Oh, you darn fool! Turn that blackboard around the other way.
Turn it around, around!
Like that?
No, that's just like it was. Why don't you turn it twice first?
You said it twice.
No, that never turns around so folks can read what's on it there.
Yeah, like that?
Why, of course. Now come on in here before you turn again.
Bertie? This will make up your mind what you do want.
Oh, you're getting worse every day. I know who would have wanted all the time.
I didn't say so then.
I did say so. I wanted so folks would know about this special sale we're running.
You mean the sale of Union suits and shirts and socks?
Well, what else could it mean?
Well, I don't know. You didn't say anything.
You know very well I don't mean nothing else. Ain't that what's on the blackboard?
No, it ain't.
Oh, you're crazy. What is on it there?
Nothing.
Nothing? Why, I'm going out and see. Don't believe me.
What do you mean?
Oh, Sonny, Sonny. Who in Sonny rubbed that out?
I did. I did.
You did?
Well, why? That's what I want to know. Why'd you do it?
Well, the sale is finished, ain't it?
Finished? Why, you darn fool, we only started it yesterday.
I didn't know we was going to run it more than one day.
One day? Did you think we was going to sell all them Union suits in one day?
That ad we put on the blackboard was any good, we ought to.
Oh, that ad was all right. Didn't I tell you what to write?
Yeah, but we didn't sell none yesterday.
What of it? Rome wasn't built in a day.
They built it out of Union suits?
No, they didn't. I just meant...
You mean the fellows that built it wore Union suits.
I didn't mean nothing of the kind. I just...
Oh, you mean they didn't wear nothing?
Of course they wore something. That is, as close as it did.
They must have worn... What's the difference what they wore?
We're talking about that blackboard, ain't we?
Well, you ought to know, you're doing all the talking.
Hey, Peters, you shut that trap and bring the blackboard in here.
It ain't been more than five minutes.
Go on now, no more of your backtalk.
All right, don't need to get to Dad during persnickety about it.
Well, I won't have it.
Oh, there's something wrong.
Go on, there.
Oh, son of a...
Look out what you're doing here! Look out there!
Son of a...
Now look what you've done there. Look.
I couldn't help it.
Couldn't see over the Dad's darn thing.
Oh, dag nabbit.
Now we got to put in a new piece of that screen.
Another 30 cents shot to blazes.
That old one had a hole in it anyway.
Well, what if it did?
We got to have some place to let the flies out, ain't we?
What are you worrying about, then?
There's more room for them to get out now than there ever was before.
Oh, you're crazy.
Now what you standing there holding that blackboard first?
Waiting for you to tell me where to put it.
Oh, put it up against that flower barrel.
Darn fool for rubbing it out anyway.
Here's the chalk.
Well, what do you want me to write now?
What do you suppose I want you to write?
Same as you did yesterday, of course.
Now get to acting.
All right.
Chuck, you need to get head up easy today, don't you?
Never mind.
You just go on with your writing.
You know what we've got to do, Ed?
We've got to pay our telephone bill before tomorrow noon.
Oh, I mean about these union suits.
What was it that salesman was talking about last week?
Oh, yes, high pressure.
That's what we'll do.
High pressure him.
Well, what's high pressure?
Well, it's just...
Oh, Chuck, you know what high means, don't you?
Yeah, but I thought we was making these union suits low instead of high.
No, this high don't mean high price.
It means high like...
Well, like the steeple on the brick church.
And what does the rest of it mean?
Pressure?
Yeah.
Why, it means to press.
Yeah, it's to press.
Oh, yes, I see now.
You mean we've got to take all these union suits up in the steeple of the brick church and press them?
Oh, Cardinal Sharnatt, I don't mean...
How are you going to keep the iron hot away up there?
Oh, we ain't going up there.
What I was...
I thought it was all dead there in foolishness and the press place.
We can press them just as well right here in the store.
We ain't going to press in no place.
Then what are you talking about?
If you just keep the trap shut, I'll tell you what we're talking about.
We're talking about selling these union suits.
Oh, yeah.
Now, what we've got to do is try to sell one to everybody that comes in.
Man, woman, chick or child.
Don't let them get out without buying a union suit.
That's what high pressure means.
It means everybody, huh?
Yes, sir, everybody.
Sell everybody.
Yes, sir.
If we can sell one to everybody that comes in, it won't be long before they're all gone.
What'll I tell them?
Oh, dag nabbit.
Can't you use your own head once in a while?
Tell them about these union suits being all wool.
How they won't shrink clear up to your knees like lots of them do, see?
And especially about the low price on them.
Tell them anything, just so you sell them.
High pressure.
Yeah, but how do you go about it?
Well, now look.
Here comes a feller into the store.
I don't see no feller.
Never mind.
I tell you that the feller comes into the store.
All right, all right.
Go on, go on.
And he asks for a package of cigarettes.
Now, after he buys the cigarettes, you tell him he needs a shirt.
You tell him.
I can't even see the feller.
Oh, he's just in here for instance.
In here for instance.
I like to say he's in for cigarettes.
He is in for cigarettes, but as soon as he buys them and puts them in his coat pocket,
you tell him he needs a shirt.
If he's got a coat on, how can I tell he needs a shirt?
Oh, but that's the whole idea.
That's the whole idea.
That's what high pressuring is.
When somebody buys something, you sell them something else to go with it.
Like if he'd ask for a button, you'd sell him a goat.
No, you wouldn't sell him no goat.
He wouldn't want a goat.
You'd sell him a needle and thread to sew the buttons on.
On the goat?
On his shirt.
But I thought he didn't have no shirt.
Certainly he's got a shirt.
Then what are we trying to sell him one for?
Oh, this is another feller, another feller.
Say, we're getting quite a crowd in here, ain't we?
Listen, never mind the remarks.
You just do as I tell you.
Now the first question that comes in here,
you tell them they need a shirt.
Yes, but how I know shirts?
I won't know.
Never mind.
Tell them you hear they ain't got a shirt.
Well, I'll tell them something there.
Shirt.
Say, I hear you ain't got a shirt to your back.
What?
Oh, no.
Why, you're all the nerve.
You didn't hear me.
It's funny.
No, I thought it was that.
We was talking about something.
Talking among ourselves.
Yes.
Now, what do you want, Miss Bun?
Well, I'm looking for Mr. DuRard.
Is he here?
No, he ain't.
We ain't seen him.
Well, I like that.
I made an appointment to meet him here at nine o'clock.
What time, you say?
Nine o'clock.
Does he think he can meet me?
Why, say, it's quarter to ten now.
Say, Miss Bun, how you fix the union suit?
We've got...
I don't need any, thank you.
What do you want to see Mr. DuRard about?
I'll wait a few minutes.
I don't know what's the matter with him.
He didn't need waiting like this.
Just let me show you one of these union suits.
They're all worn.
I don't want a union suit.
How's your Mr. DuRard getting along with the statues?
Well, that's what I want to see him about.
I want to get instructions on it.
Just look at the price we've got on these union suits.
You can't afford to pay half a bunch.
Now, see here.
Twice, I've started...
Yes, she's bought union suits twice.
You've got two of them already, ain't you, Miss Bun?
Two?
It's none of your business.
But I have a dozen suits of underwear.
Well, if you buy them by the dozen shops,
we can make the price still lower, couldn't we, Zab?
What size do you have?
Why, of all the...
Look here.
Do you know where I can find Mr. DuRard?
No, I can't see as a dude.
Well, I'm not going to wait any longer.
That's right.
You're not going to wait any longer.
These union suits won't last long as the price that we got on them.
I'm not talking about union suits.
May I leave an envelope here for Mr. DuRard?
Why, yes, I suppose you can.
A picture of my father.
And you tell him to make the statue exactly like this picture.
All right, we'll do that.
You want to look at these union suits before you go?
Oh, for goodness sake, no.
Can you let me have a sheet of paper and a pen?
I suppose so.
Here you are.
I'm afraid you'll get my message mixed up, so I'll write it out.
Yes, maybe you'd better write yourself, yes.
But you tell him to, so there won't be any chance of him missing.
You tell him I said the statue must be exactly like this picture,
no matter what anyone else says.
All right.
I'll tell him as soon as he comes in.
And I'll put the message right in the envelope with the picture.
Yeah, I'll give it to him.
Never mind.
Mr. Winterbottom will do it.
Yes.
Here, I'll tell you, I'll put it right in the cash register where I can't forget it.
Thank you.
These union suits won't shrink when you wash them.
Does yours shrink?
Oh, you're simply impossible.
I've never heard of such impudence.
I won't stay here another minute.
I'm always kiddin' with you.
Well, I shush.
I done like you told me, tried to turn the pressure on high, but it was no use.
Oh, you darn fool.
Them union suits is all for men.