the
from television city in hollywood we bring you the jack many programs
thank you thank you very much ladies and gentlemen are welcome to the lucky
strike program
as you probably know this is my first television show of the season
and i'm quite excited about it because last year
i only did ten shows
the whole year this year i want to do thirteen
thirteen shows that's three more than i did last year
or four hundred and eighty six less
and arthur got free
but this season i promise you i'm going to bring some of the most important
guest stars
that you've ever seen
on my on my television shows as a matter of fact i've already made arrangements
uh... to import
some of these celebrities over from europe from italy
i'm bringing a lot of the celebrities i'm bringing over uh...
gene kelly
gregory peg
robert taylor
claudette colbert
and uh... marie albergetti
or not all that when i got here and how
the others i'm bringing over you know
and i'm also going to have this year of very very important
broadway celebrity
uh... mister wayne's father
i know that his
that his name at the moment is not
you're not familiar with his name but that as soon as you see him
you'll recognize
because for four consecutive weeks
he sat in the audience next to the celebrity
who was introduced by ed sullivan
his agent is a not sure
well
anyway here i am for the first show and i'm uh...
one of the reason i'm so happy because i had for the first time a wonderful
vacation the most one of the i went to honolulu
you know for three weeks and ladies and gentlemen
if you've never been a hawaii
you must go
you know i always thought that those narrators
narrate the travelogues i always thought that they exaggerate but
really don't they don't it's such a beautiful place
the matter of fact the hawaiian islands
are really the
the the tropical
of in fact
yes the tropical islands of enchantment
the paradise of the pacific
how about you
the city of honolulu rising among regal palms on the curve of waikiki beach
the splendor of the royal hawaiian hotel and in the background
diamond head
wearing a majestic crown of fleecy clouds held in place by the gentle
pressure of the trade winds
but out of this dream our visitors are abruptly brought back to reality
by the realization that their vacation has come to an end
but even the farewell is something to remember
hawaii's heartwarming aloha
as the luxurious queen of the pacific the lorleen prepares to sail
there is music
flowers and tumultuous gaiety
and here on the dock
is where one of the most colorful ceremonies of the island takes place
the presentation of the legs
this is an old custom by which the natives express their feelings toward
the departing visitors
first is the orchid leg
presented to those who have made friends while on the island
next comes the plumeria blossom
this token when presented to a traveler expresses the sincere wish
that soon he will return again
yes
nobody leaves the island without the adornment of at least one flowery
memento
or even the lei made of the common ordinary ginger blossom
is presented by the native shopkeepers to all those who have come into their
stores
and spent a little money
uh oh
is one of our departing visitors being neglected
can it be possible that of all those people with whom he
frolicked away those
carefree hours at Waikiki
not one of them remembered to present him with the island's most treasured
ah
here comes someone to correct this oversight
there's a whistle and rochester isn't here yet
i wonder what's keeping him
it's about time you got here, come on we gotta get going
look look boss do we have to leave now of course we have to leave now why are you
dressed like that
i didn't have time to change i was a special guest at a luau
a luau? that's an hawaiian smorgasbord
i know what it is
and anyway why were you a special guest
well this luau was given by the polynesian chapter of the
central avenue social and ukulele club
i know but you still could have left early enough to bring your own luggage
i couldn't help it they wouldn't let me leave until we drank a toast to king
kamehameha the first
king kamehameha the first then we drank a toast to king kamehameha the second
then i proposed a toast to king kamehameha the third
which led to a toast to king kamehameha the fourth
then they insisted that i drink a toast to king kamehameha the fifth
well you were certainly popular
popular? boss shankhands with king kamehameha the sixth
oh for heaven's sakes look rochester
there we are come on let's get the baggage and we'll go
take your own
mr. baby
i'm the manager of the haleakala
delicatessen in honolulu and in honor of you having taken all of your meals with us
during your stay here in the islands we'd like to present you with this
oh well that's well of course i noticed that the other passengers
received lays of uh...
of ginger and orchids
what is this one made of?
chicken liver
chicken liver?
you better not wear it on board boss the seagulls will drive us crazy
never mind thank you
thank you very very much
what a show off
and so with her bow majestically pointing into the trade winds
the luxurious queen of the pacific philoreline
reluctantly sails from honolulu harbor
and as the aloha tower sinks behind the horizon
we bid
fond farewell to hawaii
however
our vacation has not come to an end
for we still have the luxurious voyage homeward
ahem
uh... nice uh...
nice voyage isn't it?
i said it's a nice voyage
yes yes it
it certainly is
our uh...
our position is latitude one forty five longitude twenty one
well that's nice
the wind you know the wind is coming from the south
south east at eight knots an hour
are you the navigator?
no no but i have a commander cory space patrol compass
i ate cereal and it came out of my ears
that's how you get one of those compasses
how long did you live in kansas city
all about sixteen years
sixteen years
and uh...
you graduated from high school
in nineteen thirty six
there's uh...
someone being interviewed there must be a
celebrity of some kind
uh... yes
yes yes
you know uh... i'm uh... i'm a celebrity too
i guess i'll go to my state room
thank heaven now i can read
why doesn't he take those things off
cable grandpa king commander of the six
oh here boy
are you? no but i know his majesty personally
yes there's nothing like a trip on an ocean liner
for a voyage at sea is synonymous with romance
on shipboard many a casual acquaintance
has blossomed into true love
hello
would you like to play some shuffleboard?
no thank you
deck tennis? no
no thanks i'm reading now
okay
celebrity being interviewed over there
just want to go over and see who it is
you know after all i'm a
sort of a celebrity too
oh i beg your pardon
that's quite alright
mr kentzel what are you doing on this ship?
i just had a wonderful vacation in hawaii
no did you visit all the islands?
i went from maui to kaui from hilo to hattie
from tuheitie to tahiti
no well you must have seen all those hula dancers then with the grass skirts
yes i did and you know the most beautiful girls i ever saw
was on the island of oahu
i know i know what you mean
well is this your first trip
to the islands? oh goodness no every year this time i'm spending two
glorious weeks on the tropical islands of enchantment
no well how how can you afford it?
i got a nephew who's a master of ceremonies on a quiz program
and you always win?
this year i went direct to hawaii and he cabled me the questions
no well that's wonderful seeing is your wife with you?
who do you think i'm hiding from?
hello mr benny
after nineteen forty four would i be so...
how do you do?
certainly is a nice trip is it? yes it's lovely
weather and everything has been so nice
i'd like to introduce myself
i'm jack benny
well i'm mrs michelson
i'm doctor kinsley
yes
a voyage at sea is an event that will always be remembered
because there are so many things to enjoy
dancing in the salon sunbathing on the top deck
swimming in the ship's pool
and in the evening there is always a movie in the ship's lounge
gosh that was a great picture they showed last night
gentlemen prefer blondes
boy they sure had two beautiful girls in that movie
jade russell and
marylin monroe
i know them both so well
why couldn't one of them been on this trip
here i am alone
romantic mood
gee
marylin monroe
don't leave marylin
marylin don't go
marylin please don't go
marylin wait
marylin
why did you walk away from me
why did you want to leave me
because i can't trust myself with you
you're so strong and i'm so weak
and when you look at me with those big blue eyes
i just... i just...
i understand
in the picture all i wanted was money and diamonds
but now for the first time
i realize that all i really want
is you
marylin
dream on mr benny dream on
marylin i'm mad about you
i'm mad about you too jack
jack
will you do something wonderful for me
it would make me very happy
well of course marylin
i'd do anything
anything for you
what is it
in my next picture
there's going to be so many love scenes
i want you for my leading man
oh marylin i'd
i'd love to be your leading man
good, now if we could only get permission from darryl zanuck
why? who did mr zanuck have in mind?
himself
gee marylin
i just can't
get over
just the both of us here all alone
on the loralee
yes jack, i never dreamed it could happen to i
neither did me
marylin
why
why are you sighing?
i was just thinking jack
how generous you are
just so we could be alone on this trip
you chartered the loralee for six hundred thousand dollars
i did?
if that doesn't wake him up, nothing will
marylin i know this is sudden
but will you
will you marry me?
mary, but look at the difference
difference in our ages
well there isn't much difference marylin
you're twenty five
i'm thirty nine
yes, but what about twenty five years from now
when i'm fifty and you're thirty nine
i never thought of that
i did
you shut up
marylin, will you
will you have dinner with me tonight?
i'd love to jack
thanks ever so
at eight o'clock
but i better be going now
bye bye baby
remember, you're my baby
i'll give you the eye
though i'll be gone for a while
i know that i'll be smiling
be fine, bye and bye with my baby
bye
that's strange
what's strange?
i'm so crazy about you, but that kiss didn't affect me at all
that's funny
i'm a wreck
uh... don't forget
marylin
don't forget dinner tonight
at eight o'clock
i'll remember
marylin, come back here a minute
please come back
give me one more kiss before you go
hey, wait a minute
you're not marylin monroe
well, you ain't no werewolf flint
i was so sure i was
talking to marylin monroe
ah yes
the sea plays many mental tricks as you're gently lulled in the cradle of tranquility
but there's nothing as soothing and restful
as a pacific cruise back
from the tropical islands of enchantment
thank you
marylin uh...
this is your first
first appearance in television isn't it?
yes it is jack
well i'm quite flattered that you made your first appearance on my show
i really am
just wonderful to have you
uh... is uh... have you a picture that's coming out pretty soon a new picture
i mean we've seen gentleman prefer blonds another one new one
yes it's called how to marry a millionaire it's also in cinemascope
oh it is in cinemascope too
you know i uh... i made a picture once
the horn blows at midnight
and i believe if that had been made in cinemascope it would have been a huge
success
well you know cinemascope is very complicated
in order to put the big screen in all the theaters they have to take out a lot of seats
well in my picture they could have taken out all of the seats
jack i don't know why you're always panning the horn blows at midnight i saw it
you did?
yes and you don't know why i'm panning it?
did you like it?
no
well thanks ever so
goodbye maryland
you know ladies and gentlemen i'm really quite quite flattered i feel highly
honored that i was able to have miss monroe for my first show and i do want to
thank twentieth century fox so much
of course another thing that thrilled me today because i also opened my radio
series
today you know i did my first
radio show
and i had my same cast with me
uh... there's dennis and mary and uh... don wilson and rochester everybody
but phil harris
funny thing phil harris hasn't been with me for two years
and i still
don't dare light a match in the studio
but i love radio
am i through?
is that all i get?
thank you very very much