The Irene Dunn Fred McMurray Show.
Starring Irene Dunn as Susan.
And Fred McMurray as George.
Together in a gay new exciting comedy adventure.
Bright Star.
Yes, it's the Irene Dunn Fred McMurray Show.
Starring Irene Dunn as Susan Armstrong.
Owner and editor of the Hillsdale Morning Star.
And Fred McMurray as George Harvey.
The paper's ace reporter.
And in the office of the paper today.
Irene and Fred, Susan and George.
Are listening to the troubles of Sammy.
Copy boy of the Morning Star.
Ms. Armstrong, Mr. Harvey.
Yes, Sammy.
Oh, but why should I bore you with my problems?
Well, it's all right, Sammy. Go ahead, bore us.
Well, I've got a new girl.
Well, that doesn't sound very complicated.
But it is, Ms. Armstrong.
You see, in order to make an impression, I...
Well, I may have exaggerated my status here at the paper.
Now, how do you mean, Sammy?
Well, she thinks I'm a reporter.
Sammy, you know you shouldn't have.
I know. But a certain madness crept over me.
And, well, that's not the worst.
Well, tell us the worst, Sammy.
She wants to come down to the office and see me at work.
Mr. Harvey.
No, Sammy.
You couldn't just switch jobs for an hour or so?
Mr. Harvey's right, Sammy.
Once you begin these things, they can become terribly complicated.
Exactly.
Oh, what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive.
You make me sound like a spider.
Go to her, Sammy. Go to her. Tell her the truth.
Ask her forgiveness.
Well, maybe I'll just go back to my old girl. It's simpler.
Good. Well, now that we have that settled, Sammy, let's get on with...
Oh, excuse me, Ms. Armstrong. I've got a letter for Mr. Harvey.
I forgot to give it to him.
Oh, a letter? For me? Business, I guess.
It's scented, Mr. Harvey. Here.
Scented?
Well, it is a dad, isn't it?
Can I go into business with you, Mr. Harvey?
Smells like magnolia blossoms.
Well, aren't you going to open it, George?
Open it? Oh, open it.
Of course, if there's any reason why you don't want to.
Reason? Well, there's no reason. Not at all. No.
Hmm. Well, what do you know?
Is she right like she smells, Mr. Harvey?
Just an old classmate of mine, Sammy, from Memphis.
We correspond occasionally. Just Christmas cards. You know how it is.
Sure, I know how it is, George. Merry Christmas.
I see no reason for that tone of voice, Susan.
Maddie Lou is very happily married. Oh, how nice.
But it is a little embarrassing. You see, Sammy, go sweep the floor or something.
I just swept it. Oh.
Well... What's so embarrassing, George?
Well, it's just one of those things, Susan. You see,
Betty Lou has always written about how well Beauregard, that's her husband,
how well he's doing, and...
Well, I told her that...
Oh, you haven't been taking liberties with the truth, George.
Oh, Susan, I should think that you'd know me better than that.
Well, she does think that I'm the editor of the Star.
Oh, I don't see any harm in that. You can straighten Betty Lou out next Christmas.
As a matter of fact, Susan, she writes that she is, and I suppose Beauregard,
just happened to be passing through Hillsdale, and...
Well, Susan, I don't suppose that just for an hour or so...
George! Mr. Harvey!
Well, don't look at me like that. I mean, what's the harm?
An old classmate passes through town, and she's happy to see I'm editing my own paper,
and she and Beauregard go off into the night rejoicing.
Oh, what a tangled web we weave when first we practice.
If you're not willing to do me a simple little favor, Susan, then I'll...
Well...
I'll tell you what I'll do, George.
I'll just leave the whole thing up to Sammy, all right?
No. Well, all right. What do you say, Sammy?
Mr. Harvey, you don't deserve it. But yes.
Sammy? Sammy, you're... you're a better man than I am.
Sure, Mr. Harvey. You're just a spider.
Ha ha ha ha!
Yes?
May I come in, Mr. Harvey?
Oh, you're most welcome at any time, Susan. Anything I can do for you?
Yes. You can take your feet off my desk.
Oh, now, don't get excited. Just getting into character.
Betty Lou and Beauregard are due here any time.
George, the more I think about this thing, the more I think that...
It's just a simple little fraud, Susan.
The more the wiser, the happier.
But honestly...
She...
Oh, oh, me. Yes, Sammy?
She's here.
Betty Lou? Well, send her in, Sammy. Send her in.
George, I still think this whole thing...
Susan, it's all right for you to stay, but would you mind standing?
Standing? Well, of all the...
George Harvey, just look at me!
Well, Betty Lou, how are you?
Now, don't you say another word.
Hold still.
Oh, there.
How many girls get a chance to walk right into a great big newspaper office and kiss the editor?
Oh, Betty Lou, this is Miss Armstrong. She's one of my reporters.
How do you do? I was just leaving.
No, no, no, Susan. I mean Miss Armstrong. Stay, please.
Just look at you, George Harvey, sitting behind that great big desk, just the way I always picked you, George.
Ha, ha, that's so.
Where's Beauregard, Betty Lou? Didn't have time to stop in, I suppose.
Guess you two must be making a flying trip, huh?
George, honey, Beauregard and I, we're taking a little vacation from each other. He's back in Memphis.
Beauregard's not with you?
Well, you see, we hadn't been getting on, and I talked so many times about knowing the edit of a big newspaper,
and Beauregard took the most jealous attitude and kept saying,
if I thought so much of you, I did not just leave him for you, which I wouldn't even think of doing.
But then you know how everybody always told me how good I was at writing letters,
and I told Beauregard that you'd give me a job in a minute, and he told me you wouldn't, so here I am.
Why?
Well, George, honey, I told you, Beauregard and I...
You mean you came up here for a job?
Why, of course. Now, you just tell me where my desk is, George, and I'll be in the first thing in the morning,
you great big editor.
But, Betty Lee, we're...
Well, you great big editor, you.
Susan, I... I wonder how I got into all this.
Miss Susan, hadn't you better leave for work?
You wouldn't want Editor Harvey to give you the sack.
Editor Harvey has problems of his own patience,
and he'd better come up with some quick answers.
Betty Lou.
A very interesting situation. What are you going to do about it?
George is going to have to tell her the truth, that's all.
And this morning, too.
Oh, well, I'm sorry, but I'm going to have to go.
I'm sorry, but I'm going to have to go.
Oh, well, that's all. And this morning, too.
Wouldn't be a bit surprise if that ye is.
Good morning, Susan. Excuse me for walking in like this,
but I've been thinking about this thing all night, and...
Good morning, Patience.
How are you, Mr. Harvey?
Terrible.
You were saying, George?
Well, I've been thinking about this problem all night, Susan, and...
What have you come up with?
Nothing.
Oh, swell.
But don't worry, Susan. I'll think of something. Tomorrow night, sure.
You're not waiting until tomorrow night, George.
You're going to tell that Betty Lou the truth this morning.
Well, isn't that awfully sudden?
George Harvey, I'm warning you.
Well, Patience, Patience, I imagine you're familiar with my problem?
Yes, Mr. Harvey.
All right, Patience, I'll leave it up to you, then. You call it.
If you say yes, I'll make a clean rest of things this morning, positively.
Yes or no?
Yes.
Oh. Let's make it two out of three.
George?
There she is, George. Go right over and tell her.
The truth.
Well, don't push me, Susan. Don't push me.
How's that mean old editor this morning?
Well...
What do I do first, Georgie? Expose some gangsters?
Well, I'd intended to send Miss Armstrong out on that story, but...
You intended to...
Tell her, George.
Yes, but Betty...
Haven't you got something you want to say, Mr. Harvey?
Well...
I'm just dying to hear, George.
Well, I... I'll expect you back by noon, Miss Armstrong.
A deadline, you know.
A deadline? Oh, George, how do you say the most fascinating thing?
Do I really? Honestly?
Honestly and truly, I may kill both of them.
May I come in, Chief?
Never mind the cutting sarcasm, Sammy. Things are tough enough already.
Here's a story by Miss Armstrong, Chief.
She calls for the immediate arrest of racketeer Mugsy Crane.
Well...
Mugsy might get sorry, Mr. Harvey.
He might come here to the office and threaten her.
Hardly, Sammy, hardly.
That's why I suggest putting Betty Lou's name on the story.
She might get so frightened that she'd go back to Memphis and Beauregard.
Wonderful. But how do we make Mugsy show up here?
I can hire a friend, Mr. Harvey. Lefty McLarnon.
He's honest, but he looks crooked.
Betty Lou would never know the difference.
Wait. He impersonates Mugsy Crane, gives Betty Lou 24 hours to get out of town.
Sammy?
You have a head on your shoulders.
It's small, but powerful.
Sammy, if I ever do get to be an editor, you shall be my right-hand man.
George! George, look at this edition.
Who changed my byline and put Betty Lou's name instead?
Susan, she'll hear you.
I don't care who hears me, George.
I wrote this story on Mugsy Crane, and I want to know why my name isn't...
Susan, Susan, it's just a clever little scheme I worked out.
You see...
Will you get that, Sammy?
Sure, Mr. Harvey.
Hillsdale Morningstar.
You see, a friend of Sammy, pretending to be Mugsy Crane...
What? But Lefty, you have to make it.
It's a matter of life and death.
Of course.
You can't?
Positively?
I'll tell Mr. Harvey.
Mr. Harvey, can I speak to you for a minute?
No, later, Sammy.
I'm talking to Miss Armstrong, explaining our plot.
But that's what I have to talk to you about, Mr. Harvey.
Lefty says...
Hey! Who in here is Betty Lou Costas?
There he is, Sammy. Susan, right-arm cue.
Yeah, but he...
Who's Betty Lou Costas?
I'm Mugsy Crane, and I don't like what she wrote about me.
And when I don't like, I do something about it.
Are you Betty Lou Costas?
Me? Oh, no, indeed.
Advance her over there, Lefty. Do a good job.
Mr. Harvey.
Did I get somebody calling my name?
You certainly did, Betty Lou.
Miss Costas, this is Mugsy Crane.
Lay it on thick, Lefty.
Mr. Harvey.
Am I? What broad shoulders, Mr. Crane.
Sure. You shouldn't have written them things about me, Miss.
You... you shouldn't have.
Scare her, Lefty. I mean, Mugsy. Scare her.
Who are you, buster?
I'm the editor, but the one you want to talk to must be...
I don't hit no dames. Did you tell her to write them things?
Well, yes. I mean, no.
Look, Mr. Editor, I'll tell you so you can remember.
I don't like the things you print about.
Now, wait a minute, Mugsy Crane. If you think you can scare me, you...
Lefty, don't get carried away.
Hey!
Oh, stop! Don't hit him!
Mugsy, stop!
That is nothing.
Next time I have to tell him, I won't do it so gentle.
I'll remind him of that when he wakes up.
Oh, poor, brave George.
I never realized how dangerous it is to be an editor.
You know, Betty Lou, I don't think George did either.
Poor Mr. Harvey.
opportune
mortgage
THE L Murder executive
And now back to our two stars, Irene Dunn and Fred McMurray,
and Fred McMurray and the second act of our story.
George has taken over the editorship of the paper with outstanding results.
Dividends so far, a black eye from an irate gangster,
a cold shoulder from Susan,
and a very uncertain future in the newspaper business.
Oh, good evening Mr. Harvey. Won't you come in?
Thank you, Patience.
Mr. Armstrong is right. Mr. Harvey, your eye!
I know, I know, Patience. I was watching a ping pong game and got too close.
Oh, those things will happen, Mr. Harvey.
They will, will they?
George, I'm in here.
Susan, Susan, I've decided that this whole ridiculous business has gone too far.
You're so right, George.
I'm sorry I let myself be talked into it in the first place and I'm going to...
Who talked you into it?
I'm determined on a showdown. I invited Betty Lou over here this evening and I'll put an end to this whole affair.
Good. You're going to tell her the truth.
Well, not exactly. Something much better.
Much better? Now listen, George, if you think I'm going to let you go on pretending...
There she is, Susan. I've got a little plan that can't miss.
And in the meantime, I wish you'd stop writing those articles about Mugsy Crane. It's too hard on my eyes.
I have no intention of giving up on Mr. Crane and as far as any plan about Betty Lou...
Betty Lou? Patience is letting her in. I'm going to be very cruel to her, Susan. It's the only way.
Cruel?
When she sees that she can never mean anything to me, she'll go back to Memphis and Beauregard. I work this out by myself.
Oh, surprise, surprise.
Oh, Charlie, why didn't you tell me you had this perfectly gorgeous house all by yourself?
Here's how I should have it. Oh, it's really nothing, Betty Lou.
Oh, and so expensive. No, no, no. It cost me practically nothing.
He's so right.
Why, Miss Armstrong, I didn't notice you there at all.
Well, Susan, we're just leaving, Betty Lou. I mean, Miss Armstrong.
Won't you, Miss Armstrong...
Just leaving, Mr. Harvey. But I'm not going very far.
Fine, fine. Good night, Miss Armstrong.
Good night. Good night.
Now, sit right down and tell me about this big important thing on your mind, George, honey.
Well, I... plenty of room? Just right.
Betty Lou, I've decided that there really isn't any point in your staying on here in Hillsdale because...
George, remember the night of the junior prom.
Yes. As I was saying, Betty Lou...
You were so cute the way you kept cutting in.
I was? So die-shin.
Betty Lou, I want to be very frank with you and honest, even though it seems cruel.
I don't feel justified in coming between you and Beauregard, and as far as your working on the paper is concerned...
Oh, that's so noble of you, Georgie, saying what you don't mean just out of duty to Beauregard.
But I...
Shall we dance, George, honey, or just snuggle?
Well, I guess we'd better dance.
Dance, sir.
Somehow things seem to be closing in on me.
Have they gone, Miss Susan?
Finally, patient.
Nothing accomplished, I take it.
Toward getting Betty Lou to go home? Nothing.
Well, don't you think it's time you took things into your own hands, Miss Susan?
It's past time.
Patience, hand me that phone, please.
Oh, yes.
Long distance?
Long distance.
Hello, operator?
I want to speak to Memphis, Tennessee, Mr. Beauregard Carstairs.
This Miss Carstairs calling.
Yes, I'll wait, operator, but not too long.
I'm just expiring to speak to my sweet Beauregard.
I think I sound southern enough, patient.
Miss Susan, any more southern and you'd turn into a candied yam.
Telegram just came for you, Chief.
Just put it down, Sammy, put it down.
Why don't you open the wire, Mr. Harvey?
Might be good news.
Don't be a comedian, Sammy.
I'll open it for you.
Good news, Mr. Harvey.
It's from Beauregard Carstairs.
Why?
He's coming to take Betty Lou home with him.
Wonderful.
And he gives you 24 hours to get out of town.
Oh.
But don't worry, Mr. Harvey, he may never catch up with you.
Why?
There was a call a few minutes ago from Mugsy Crane.
He gives you only 12 hours to get out of town.
Oh, well, what'll I do, Sammy?
I'll think of something, Mr. Harvey.
I'm with you right to the end.
My only friend.
Sammy, if I ever get out of this, and I ever get anywhere in the newspaper game, I'll make you my partner.
If it's all the same to you, Mr. Harvey, I'd like to tie up with someone with a little more future.
Where's the Chief, Sammy?
In his office, Miss Armstrong.
Or your office.
It's very confusing.
To say the least. Do you know what he's doing?
I think he's making out a will.
He figures that if Mugsy Crane doesn't get him, Beauregard Carstairs is bound to.
Well, he doesn't deserve it, Sammy, but I'll see if I can come to the rescue.
Do, Miss Armstrong, do. Mr. Harvey means well at all times.
He's just a plaything of fate.
The story of his life, Sammy.
You're calling an ambulance?
No, not quite yet. Hello?
I want to speak to Mugsy Crane.
Oh, Mr. Crane, this is Susan Armstrong of the Morningstar.
Mr. Crane, we're going to have the man down here responsible for those articles about you.
So if you'd care to drop around in about half an hour, you'd be here? Oh, thank you.
Miss Armstrong.
Wait, Sammy, wait. Grand Hotel, has Mr. Beauregard Carstairs checked in yet?
Yes? Oh, would you put him on, please?
Hello? Beauregard? This is your little Betty Lou.
Miss Armstrong, there's a little frightening one aroused.
Well, I'm just dying to see you too, Beauregard, honey.
Will you just get that right over here to this paper?
In about half an hour or so, there's just one thing.
The man I've been doing the town with, it isn't George Harvey at all.
Ah-ha!
No, his name is Mugsy Crane, Beauregard.
Now you forget I told you. I know how violent you are. C-R-A-N-E.
See you soon, Beauregard lion. Bye.
Miss Armstrong, do me a favor.
What, Sammy?
Never turn against me. I wouldn't have a chance.
Mr. Harvey, come on out.
Why, Sammy? Why?
Mr. Crane is here. He just came in.
Oh, well, I guess I may as well face him now as later.
Miss Armstrong sent for him.
Susan did?
Well, I hope you don't mind, George.
Mind? Why should I mind? What's left for me now that you two have turned against me?
I asked Beauregard to come over too. He'll be here in a minute.
It doesn't even cause me pain, Susan. I'm past that.
Hey, bud, come here.
Me? You?
Are you or are you not on back of those things your paper has been saying about me?
I warn you, Mugsy, that I intend to defend myself with a last drop of...
Excuse me, is this the office of the Morning Star?
Beauregard, honey.
Oh, Betty Lou, honey.
What is this, the tunnel of love?
I came as soon as I got your call, Peaches and Crane.
My call? But Beauregard, darling, I didn't expect you so soon, right, Betty Lou?
A far be it from me to interrupt for a mere homicide lady, but I got a lot of chores to do today.
Excuse me, sir. I don't believe I've been properly introduced around, Betty Lou.
Who cares? For once, I agree with you.
But Beauregard, honey, this is Miss Armstrong.
Ciao, Miss Armstrong.
My pleasure, Mr. Carst. Um, how do you do?
And this is Mr. George Harvey, Beauregard.
Mr. Harvey, sir, I feel that I have misjudged you.
You have? Oh, that is, you have, yes, you have.
Look, folks, I got a hot thing going on the Fifth of Pimlico, while all this is very charming.
And this, Beauregard, is Mr. Crane.
Crane?
C-R-A-M-E.
Prepare, Mr. Crane, to defend yourself.
I'm gonna nest a crackpot.
Beauregard, stop!
Not till the damage to your name is repaired, Betty Lou. Put up your hands, sir.
Hey, it's a bum rap, I-I-I-I-I-I-I! There you are, sir.
Well done, Beauregard.
I, uh, I don't understand it, but I love it.
And let that be a lesson, sir.
I don't think he can hear you.
Beauregard, you were so, so masterful.
Shall we go, my dear? We must pack for our trip back to Memphis.
Of course, Beauregard, if you say so. Goodbye, George. Goodbye, Miss Armstrong.
Goodbye, goodbye.
Come back again.
Susan, this is all very puzzling.
Really?
Would you mind coming into my office and explaining?
Whose office, George?
Well, your office, Susan. Of course.
Somehow I have the feeling that I've lost the upper hand.
You know something, George? You're right.
Poor Mr. Harvey.
Our stars, Irene Dunn and Fred McMurray, will be back in just a moment.
Susan.
Yes, George?
Aren't you ever going to explain to me what happened?
I don't think so, George.
I'd rather have you think of it as a superior intelligence moving mysteriously behind the scenes.
I refuse to concede any superior intelligence, Susan.
It all has some perfectly rational explanation, and if you won't tell me, I can find out by, by you...
By what, George? By writing to Betty Lou, honey?
Well, I did have that in mind.
Of course, it might be better to wait until Christmas.
Oh, that's when you usually correspond.
No, no need in making a special point of it.
Beauregard might misunderstand.
Beauregard.
You're really going to keep up the correspondence, George?
Well, this Christmas I'll be very careful to select just a plain card. No sentiment.
No sentiment?
No sentiment. And then I'm going to sign a wrong name. I'm just impetuous, Susan. Not stupid.
Oh, George.
Irene Dunn and Fred McMurray will be back next week in another exciting comedy adventure in the gay new series, Bright Star.
This is Wendell Niles inviting you to join us then.
Thanks for watching.