WEBVTT 00:00.000 --> 00:10.000 Personal notice, danger's my stock and trade. If the job's too tough for you to handle, you got a job for me, George Valentine. Write full details. 00:10.000 --> 00:39.000 A few years ago, a new slogan or slang expression was thrust on the vocabulary of the American public. You remember it. It came in very handy when the wife wanted you to clean out the attic. 00:40.000 --> 00:59.000 Or your brother-in-law put the bite on you for a ten spot. It was, quote, drop dead, unquote. Of course, it never did you any good, but it was better than 23 skidoo or go jump in the lake. If you listen carefully, you may get some tips on how to use the expression with more effective results. 01:00.000 --> 01:08.000 It all started with a phone call at George Valentine's office by a little fella who was just full of questions. Oh, let's see if George has any of the answers. 01:08.000 --> 01:16.000 Don't you want a story? Hold it, will you? Who is this? Jerry Huell, I said. I'm a writer and I have a story. Yeah, well, this is George Valentine and I'm not a publisher. 01:17.000 --> 01:24.000 Please listen to me. You've got to meet me right away. Captain Charlie's Neptune Palace, the old waterfront district. The captain's who's what? 01:25.000 --> 01:35.000 I live here. It's an old hotel. I'm collecting material. But this particular story, I'm afraid I don't know how it ends. And that's why I need you. Sounds to me like it goes around in a circle. 01:35.000 --> 01:40.000 I want to be there when it ends. Don't you understand? That's why I'm calling you instead of the police. 01:41.000 --> 01:42.000 Police? What kind of a story is it? 01:43.000 --> 01:49.000 Well, it concerns a mysterious stranger and a seaman who choose tobacco. And mostly, of course, the parrot. 01:50.000 --> 01:50.000 The what? 01:51.000 --> 01:58.000 The parrot, a green and orange parrot. Ordinarily, I don't like parrots myself, such mangy squawking creatures, but Captain Charlie, of course, will he's the... 01:59.000 --> 02:01.000 A green and orange parrot. Now look, friend, if you... 02:01.000 --> 02:08.000 Meet me in 15 minutes at the foot of Tide Street, please. You don't want anyone else to get their hands on this story, do you? 02:21.000 --> 02:29.000 Well, I don't know, Mr. Yule. It all depends whether or not this story has a happy ending. And from where I sit, I'll bet you it hasn't. 02:29.000 --> 02:34.000 However, to keep things even, here's another kind of story that I know has a happy ending. 02:37.000 --> 02:42.000 Now, let's see. George and Bruxy were supposed to meet a Mr. Yule at the foot of Tide Street. 02:43.000 --> 02:49.000 Say, that's a pretty rough part of town. You better watch it, George. You might get in over your head. 02:50.000 --> 02:51.000 Is it always so foggy down here? 02:52.000 --> 02:53.000 Only in the summer. 02:54.000 --> 02:57.000 Captain Charlie's Neptune Palace. Quite an ornate old place, isn't it? 02:57.000 --> 03:01.000 Oh, the rooms are empty now, or most of them, and half of it is locked off, of course. 03:02.000 --> 03:06.000 It tips like a one-legged man there where the piling is underneath the sinking. 03:07.000 --> 03:11.000 The commercial docs went away and left this district, you see, when they built the new pier's father town. 03:12.000 --> 03:15.000 Beer and sandwiches. Step into the kitchen and make your own. Rooms, 50 cents. 03:16.000 --> 03:19.000 Quite a come down from the kind of hotel it must have been once. 03:20.000 --> 03:24.000 Oh, but there's no tranchant trade, you understand, Miss Brooks. Just the ones Captain Charlie asked to stay permanently. 03:24.000 --> 03:27.000 Like writers who specialize in foggy stories. 03:28.000 --> 03:34.000 Now, just be patient, Mr. Valentine. I want you to understand this setting, that's all. 03:35.000 --> 03:38.000 It's mood, it's character, it's strange, it... 03:39.000 --> 03:40.000 Shut the door! 03:40.000 --> 03:41.000 Oh, hello! 03:41.000 --> 03:42.000 You want some coffee? Pour your own. 03:43.000 --> 03:45.000 Oh, don't look at me, friend. Captain Charlie, I suppose. 03:46.000 --> 03:47.000 No, no, this is Morton. 03:48.000 --> 03:50.000 Sure, I'm not crazy. I just look that way. 03:50.000 --> 03:53.000 The business cards, menus and wedding announcements, that's his line. 03:54.000 --> 03:55.000 Why? 03:55.000 --> 03:57.000 Why, he used to do the menus on the Lusitania, no less. 03:58.000 --> 04:00.000 Been sunk ever since. 04:01.000 --> 04:05.000 He prints Charlie stationary for him. Not that Charlie ever uses any, but that's how he took him in. 04:06.000 --> 04:08.000 Where's the draft coming from? Morton, the door! 04:09.000 --> 04:11.000 That's all right, Sadie. Go back to your knitting. 04:12.000 --> 04:17.000 Oh, there, that's Sadie. She used to own the place back in the gay days when it was Sadie's Neptune house. 04:17.000 --> 04:22.000 Sure, sure, but Captain Charlie never had the heart to throw her out either. 04:23.000 --> 04:24.000 Who're your friends, you? 04:24.000 --> 04:25.000 Oh, never mind us. 04:25.000 --> 04:26.000 Who's down there? 04:27.000 --> 04:29.000 All we care about is a story, not that we'll ever get it. 04:30.000 --> 04:32.000 Yeah, well, now, Morton here, he was in it. 04:33.000 --> 04:36.000 Oh, no, I'm not. Charlie gave me a check for the 25 bucks. 04:37.000 --> 04:39.000 Don't mix me up in your fiction. 04:40.000 --> 04:42.000 Parrots, ha! Bird feathers. 04:43.000 --> 04:45.000 I said who's down there? You, Captain? 04:45.000 --> 04:48.000 Look, Buster, for the last time, will you tell us what this is all about? 04:49.000 --> 04:53.000 Come on, come on, through here. No bar room. I'll give you all right. 04:56.000 --> 04:59.000 Well, well, well, and who might your friends be, Mr. Yule? 05:00.000 --> 05:01.000 No matter, no matter, the welcome's always out. 05:02.000 --> 05:05.000 But you know what I've been here, sitting and thinking, me and Limey here? 05:06.000 --> 05:07.000 Right, Skipper and me been thinking. 05:07.000 --> 05:08.000 Be quiet. 05:08.000 --> 05:09.000 Right, Skipper. 05:09.000 --> 05:11.000 The next thing this hotel needs is a rubber plant. 05:11.000 --> 05:15.000 I remember in Bombay once I seen the most lovely rubber plant. 05:16.000 --> 05:18.000 Hey, wait a minute. I wanted to tell these people about last night. 05:19.000 --> 05:20.000 Oh, that. Well, now, I don't blame you. 05:21.000 --> 05:25.000 Last night, young lady, I bought the most lovely green parrot that any man ever saw. 05:26.000 --> 05:27.000 Do you know this morning he had... 05:28.000 --> 05:31.000 Captain, would you mind sticking with last night? What is it? What happened last night? 05:32.000 --> 05:33.000 He told you, Governor, he bought a parrot. 05:34.000 --> 05:36.000 No, no, no, no, no. But a story should begin at the beginning. 05:36.000 --> 05:40.000 And, Mr. Valentine, the very first thing was $25. That's what woke me up. 05:41.000 --> 05:42.000 What? 05:42.000 --> 05:45.000 Right. I woke you all up tomorrow at sea. Only he didn't have it. 05:46.000 --> 05:49.000 And neither did Sadie, so I had to break the lock on Morton's room and dig it out of his stuff. 05:50.000 --> 05:53.000 That's on account of the Skipper here was a little short in the cash register. 05:54.000 --> 05:56.000 Made Morton sore, too. Made all of you sore. 05:57.000 --> 05:58.000 Oh, not me, Skipper. 05:59.000 --> 06:02.000 Nobody appreciates a good parrot, young lady, but I do and I bought him. 06:02.000 --> 06:05.000 Had to scrape up a whole hundred dollars. That's the story. 06:06.000 --> 06:07.000 But I made it and I bought him. 06:08.000 --> 06:10.000 Limey, run fetch the bird. Show the people. 06:11.000 --> 06:12.000 Right, Skipper, whatever you say. 06:13.000 --> 06:15.000 I'll give you a hand in case he talks back. 06:16.000 --> 06:21.000 Ah, Yule, is that all there is to it? Just that the captain bought a bird... 06:22.000 --> 06:26.000 Mr. Valentine, the stranger. Now let me tell you about him. The man he bought the bird from. 06:27.000 --> 06:28.000 The mysterious stranger? 06:28.000 --> 06:31.000 Don't look at me that way. He was. He was a foreigner of some sort. 06:32.000 --> 06:37.000 He was a Hindu or Sikh or something. One of those big fellas with a beard and a turban. 06:38.000 --> 06:42.000 But a sailor. And he and Charlie gibbered away at a great rate in some heathen tongue. 06:43.000 --> 06:44.000 Oh, now look, friend. 06:45.000 --> 06:47.000 He wanted to get rid of that bird, the Sikh did. Acted as if he was afraid of him. 06:48.000 --> 06:51.000 That's why all the fuss about the money. He was so anxious to get paid and get out. 06:52.000 --> 06:54.000 And when he left, he left a runnin'. 06:55.000 --> 06:56.000 Well? Here, now wait. 06:56.000 --> 07:00.000 Here he is. Aren't you, you ducky lout? 07:01.000 --> 07:03.000 Careful there, Lyme. Careful he don't slip off your shoulder. 07:04.000 --> 07:06.000 He's taking quite a fancy to Lyme here, you know that? 07:07.000 --> 07:08.000 So that's the parrot. 07:09.000 --> 07:10.000 Isn't he the most lovely bird you ever saw? 07:11.000 --> 07:12.000 Well, I wouldn't exactly say... 07:13.000 --> 07:15.000 Oh, Lyme's gonna clean him up a bit. You know how it is. 07:16.000 --> 07:19.000 But here, here, let me show you. This is a piece of resistance. 07:20.000 --> 07:23.000 Now come on, baby. Say it. Speak out for the people, baby. 07:23.000 --> 07:25.000 Oh, fine bird. He talks, yeah. 07:26.000 --> 07:29.000 That's a baby. That's a baby. Talk right up like you did to the heathen. 07:30.000 --> 07:31.000 Speak out, baby. Speak out. 07:32.000 --> 07:33.000 Drop dead. Drop dead. Drop dead. 07:34.000 --> 07:35.000 Drop dead? 07:36.000 --> 07:37.000 Isn't he the most lovely thing you ever heard? 07:38.000 --> 07:39.000 Drop dead. That does it. 07:40.000 --> 07:50.000 Valentine, wait, wait, wait. Wouldn't it interest you if I told you that I took a walk this morning just before I called you, and that I found the Sikh, that heathen sailor who was so afraid and so anxious to get rid of the bird. 07:50.000 --> 07:57.000 And that the poor man was just lying there in an alley. Dead. 08:12.000 --> 08:18.000 Now, wait a minute. That man didn't drop dead. He was rolled. Look at his pockets. See for yourself. Slugged and rolled, that's all. 08:18.000 --> 08:22.000 Yeah, you're right, Lieutenant. Only whoever hit him tapped him a little too hard, check. 08:23.000 --> 08:24.000 It's happened more than once down here. 08:25.000 --> 08:26.000 Don't you think it's interesting that... 08:27.000 --> 08:32.000 And never mind that Eye of the Idol mystery magazine stuff either, Mr. Yule. What I want to know is why you didn't report this to the police quicker. 08:33.000 --> 08:34.000 But here in the alley, I knew no one would find him. 08:35.000 --> 08:40.000 Besides which? A beard and a turban. You don't even know he's the same guy you saw last night. 08:41.000 --> 08:42.000 I think he is. 08:42.000 --> 08:49.000 Yeah, there's a whole shipload of these birds in port. Can you tell them apart? Routine. That's a routine case and you've got to clutter it up. Big mystery. 08:50.000 --> 08:52.000 Okay, boys, where's that wagon? 08:53.000 --> 08:54.000 Well, Mr. Yule? 08:55.000 --> 08:57.000 I wrote a story about one of these fellows once. 08:58.000 --> 09:03.000 Hey, hey, wait a minute. What are you doing? Johnson will cut your gizzard out if you touch that body. You're in enough trouble as it is. 09:04.000 --> 09:08.000 Let go of me! The turban. Here, hold that flesh out. 09:09.000 --> 09:10.000 Oh, brother. 09:10.000 --> 09:14.000 There. You see? I told you it was the same man. 09:15.000 --> 09:19.000 Yeah, whoever rolled the sailor just wasn't so bright about where he'd carry his money, huh? 09:20.000 --> 09:21.000 Yeah, 60, 70. 09:22.000 --> 09:29.000 Yeah, give me that. Yeah, it's the 100 bucks, all right. No, no, no, I'll keep it. Only so what? This still doesn't mean the parrot had anything to do with it. 09:30.000 --> 09:35.000 Hey, Mr. Valentine, look at this. Did you ever see an oriental who chewed tobacco? 09:35.000 --> 09:41.000 What? A plug? Okay, so there's been somebody around here lately who chews tobacco, but... 09:42.000 --> 09:46.000 Oh, yeah, I remember. You said on the phone something about a seaman who chews tobacco. 09:47.000 --> 09:49.000 Yes, yes, yes, a big fellow, but an American seaman. 09:50.000 --> 09:53.000 Well, where did he creep in? Now, look, Buster, you'd better spill the rest of what you know fast. 09:54.000 --> 10:02.000 I've told you everything, honestly, I have. He was just a seaman, that's all. I didn't get much of a look at him, but this morning when I woke up, he was peering in my window. 10:02.000 --> 10:09.000 And when I shouted, he ran. I came out to look around. That's when I found the body. And then I ran. 10:10.000 --> 10:13.000 Well, that's a good idea. Mr. Valentine. All right, you too, Doc. Come on. 10:14.000 --> 10:18.000 Miss Brooks is still back in the car. You went out of the other way. Tell Johnson I went to get her, will you, or some other lie? 10:19.000 --> 10:21.000 What? But I... No, no, you stay there and hold hands with Johnson. 10:21.000 --> 10:34.000 Hey, Valentine. See you later. I'm going to write a story. 10:35.000 --> 10:40.000 George, remember? He said that man in the turban seemed so anxious to get rid of the bird... 10:41.000 --> 10:45.000 Take it easy, Angel. Hey, Captain. Captain Charlie. 10:45.000 --> 10:50.000 This is a crazy strange place, isn't it? That captain gives me the jitters. 10:51.000 --> 10:56.000 Never mind. I don't want to see him anyway. Limey's the one who'll talk for us. A weasel if I ever saw one. 10:57.000 --> 10:58.000 But why? What can he tell you? What is it you're doing? 10:59.000 --> 11:02.000 Here we are, through here. Just check the information we've already got, Brooks. 11:03.000 --> 11:09.000 I'd like to weed out some of Yule's weird notions. He's about stupid enough to think that bird is some sort of weird... 11:09.000 --> 11:15.000 George. Relax, Angel. Not with the head of the stairs, that's all. Come on. 11:16.000 --> 11:17.000 Speak of the devil. 11:17.000 --> 11:43.000 Something at the bottom of the stairs, too. Limey. It's Limey. He's dead. 11:43.000 --> 11:47.000 You know, I've always found it pretty tough to squeeze juice from a lime. 11:48.000 --> 11:53.000 Well, that can't be true with everyone, because here's a case where somebody squeezed a limey too hard. 11:54.000 --> 11:57.000 Couldn't have been the parrot, but he might have been the inspiration. 11:57.000 --> 12:21.000 Now, if you're in need of inspiration, why don't you give this a listen. 12:21.000 --> 12:31.000 And now, if your name is George Valentine, you don't believe in the kind of story that has a parrot in it. 12:32.000 --> 12:36.000 When the parrot says, drop dead, people drop dead. The only trouble is they do. 12:37.000 --> 12:41.000 First a foreign sailor who sold the bird, and now the next man that the bird took a liking to, Limey. 12:42.000 --> 12:45.000 Yes, Limey is just about as dead as the sailor was. 12:46.000 --> 12:47.000 Who's going to be murdered next, George? 12:48.000 --> 12:49.000 Oh, Brooks, he cut it out with you. 12:49.000 --> 12:50.000 He didn't just fall down the stairs. 12:51.000 --> 12:52.000 It's a dark stairway. It could have happened. 12:53.000 --> 12:54.000 Only you doubt it. 12:55.000 --> 12:58.000 Yeah, I guess he was dead before he fell. But a guess isn't good enough, is it? 12:59.000 --> 13:00.000 It's also unbelievable, all these crazy characters. 13:01.000 --> 13:04.000 There's another explanation of some kind. You want to bet it's nice and simple? 13:05.000 --> 13:06.000 No. 13:07.000 --> 13:10.000 Okay, maybe not. But for instance, why is the parrot important? 13:11.000 --> 13:12.000 Why was that main G Captain so anxious to buy him in the first place? 13:13.000 --> 13:14.000 He buys Mr. Ewell so interested. 13:15.000 --> 13:16.000 Now you get the idea. So run out and get the police, will you? 13:16.000 --> 13:19.000 What are you going to do? I want to see who's around, Angel. Mostly upstairs. 13:20.000 --> 13:21.000 Well, the bird is, for one. 13:22.000 --> 13:23.000 I know. He hopped off down the hall. See you later. 13:24.000 --> 13:25.000 All right, George. 13:26.000 --> 13:28.000 You sure fell all right, Buster. 13:29.000 --> 13:32.000 Well, so who pushed you? Or slugged you first? 13:33.000 --> 13:34.000 Get him off me! 13:35.000 --> 13:36.000 What the? It's Sadie! 13:42.000 --> 13:43.000 Sadie! 13:43.000 --> 13:45.000 Get him off! Get off of me! 13:46.000 --> 13:47.000 Get out that window! 13:48.000 --> 13:50.000 All right, all right. Just a parrot, that's all. 13:51.000 --> 13:52.000 Just of all the ugly memes. 13:53.000 --> 13:56.000 All right, take it easy, take it easy. He's out the window now, huh? 13:57.000 --> 14:00.000 Sitting there on the kitchen roof like he was real proud of himself. Only what happened? 14:01.000 --> 14:04.000 Hopped through here, across my face. I was sound asleep. 14:05.000 --> 14:08.000 I told Captain Charlie I wouldn't stay here if he kept that bird. 14:08.000 --> 14:12.000 I never allowed parents when it was my hotel. This was a respectable place. 14:13.000 --> 14:16.000 Sure, sure. But look, Sadie, did you hear any noise out by the stairs a while ago? 14:17.000 --> 14:18.000 Maybe about half an hour ago? 14:19.000 --> 14:22.000 No, why should I? Everybody's been out except that awful creature. 14:23.000 --> 14:24.000 I heard them go. Why? 14:25.000 --> 14:28.000 Stripper, only tell me something, Sadie. How long have you lived here? 14:29.000 --> 14:33.000 Forty years now, I'd say, off and on. Barring a couple of marriages. 14:34.000 --> 14:35.000 But I always come back. 14:35.000 --> 14:38.000 Oh, my lands, I wouldn't know any other place to live. None of us would. 14:39.000 --> 14:41.000 All been here for years with Captain Charlie, huh? 14:42.000 --> 14:45.000 Well, of course. Except that Yule, naturally. He's recent. 14:46.000 --> 14:48.000 We're all sort of has-beens, but... 14:49.000 --> 14:54.000 Captain, he keeps us all under his wing. He's a wonderful man. Generous, honest. 14:55.000 --> 14:58.000 That was what you wanted to ask about, wasn't it? 14:59.000 --> 15:00.000 Yeah, Captain Charlie. 15:01.000 --> 15:03.000 Ask anybody in the district about Captain Charlie. 15:03.000 --> 15:04.000 Okay, okay. 15:05.000 --> 15:09.000 Nothing bad about anybody here, except for that bird. 15:10.000 --> 15:11.000 Yeah, well, I'd better get him off that roof. 15:12.000 --> 15:16.000 Well, don't you bring him back in here. He won't have that thing screaming at me like... 15:17.000 --> 15:19.000 Oh, be quiet, Sadie. Somebody else trying to get him off that roof, too. 15:20.000 --> 15:20.000 Huh? 15:21.000 --> 15:24.000 Very popular bird. No, no, stay there. I can make it around the ledge. Just stay in your room. 15:24.000 --> 15:30.000 Easy, doesn't it, boy? I'll be up there and get you in just a minute, now. 15:31.000 --> 15:33.000 We keep the big cramp shut, will you? 15:34.000 --> 15:36.000 Well, that's noise now, that's the stuff. 15:37.000 --> 15:38.000 Hmm, don't you know? A seaman. 15:39.000 --> 15:41.000 Hey, now we got your baby! 15:42.000 --> 15:43.000 Would have been easier to climb up with a ladder. 15:44.000 --> 15:45.000 What? 15:45.000 --> 15:49.000 Bird-watching society. You always chew tobacco when you go parrot hunting? 15:50.000 --> 15:51.000 Beat it, will you, buddy? I don't want no trouble. 15:51.000 --> 15:53.000 I don't blame you. Not on a slippery roof. 15:54.000 --> 15:55.000 Stay out of it, Mack. 15:56.000 --> 15:57.000 Hey, don't reach for that bird. I want to talk to you. 15:58.000 --> 15:59.000 I ain't the type! 15:59.000 --> 16:00.000 Stay where you are, I said. 16:01.000 --> 16:02.000 Drop it, drop it, drop it! 16:02.000 --> 16:03.000 Oh, still, you... 16:04.000 --> 16:07.000 Yeah, now look what you did. That's the kitchen flue he's climbing into. 16:08.000 --> 16:09.000 Now we can all have fun getting him out. 16:10.000 --> 16:11.000 Yeah, well, let him stay there. 16:11.000 --> 16:12.000 Forget him. You're the one I want. 16:13.000 --> 16:14.000 There's a little matter of people dropping dead at the... 16:15.000 --> 16:17.000 Oh, no, Mack, I had enough. I don't want no trouble. This is where I came here. 16:18.000 --> 16:19.000 Oh, don't try that. Hey, you... 16:19.000 --> 16:20.000 So long, sucker! 16:20.000 --> 16:21.000 You'll slip! 16:33.000 --> 16:36.000 Drop dead, drop dead! Valentine, you're the one I... 16:36.000 --> 16:38.000 Oh, stop it, Johnson. Drink your coffee. 16:39.000 --> 16:40.000 Easy for everybody here, folks. Help yourselves. 16:41.000 --> 16:43.000 The seaman isn't dead, Lieutenant. His skull wasn't fractured. 16:44.000 --> 16:46.000 So we gotta wait for hospital reports before we can get him to talk. 16:46.000 --> 16:50.000 Johnson, for the tenth time, leave me alone, will you? Go solve your two murders. 16:51.000 --> 16:53.000 Have you checked all these people on when they last saw Lyme? 16:54.000 --> 16:55.000 Yeah, we checked and double-checked and still haven't found anything. 16:56.000 --> 16:58.000 Okay, then leave me alone. I'll drink my coffee and think about it. 16:59.000 --> 17:01.000 Sure. First, you'll pocket a hundred bucks and run. 17:02.000 --> 17:04.000 Then you'll find something but won't say what it is. Then you... 17:05.000 --> 17:06.000 Johnson! 17:06.000 --> 17:08.000 What kind of an idea did that seaman give you? 17:09.000 --> 17:10.000 What you got up your sleeve? 17:11.000 --> 17:12.000 Well, break up this picnic and maybe you'll find out. 17:13.000 --> 17:14.000 But you... 17:14.000 --> 17:16.000 All right, all right, everybody, get out of here. 17:17.000 --> 17:19.000 There's a genius working on a story. That's all for now. 17:20.000 --> 17:21.000 Break it up, break it up. 17:32.000 --> 17:33.000 George. 17:33.000 --> 17:34.000 All right, they've gone now. So come here, brace me, Angel. 17:35.000 --> 17:36.000 And you can beat it, too. 17:36.000 --> 17:37.000 Brace you? What? 17:37.000 --> 17:38.000 George, get off of that stool. 17:39.000 --> 17:40.000 It's a big one. Got a big ear, man. 17:41.000 --> 17:42.000 What? 17:42.000 --> 17:44.000 Hope he's all right. 17:44.000 --> 17:45.000 Yeah, I can reach you. 17:46.000 --> 17:47.000 Oh, where are you, boy? 17:48.000 --> 17:49.000 Come on, come on. 17:49.000 --> 17:51.000 Oh, brother suit, grease and cobwebs. 17:52.000 --> 17:53.000 You mean he's been there all this time, the parrot? 17:54.000 --> 17:55.000 I hope he's in here. 17:55.000 --> 17:56.000 I hope I can reach him. 17:57.000 --> 17:58.000 Yeah, hey. 17:58.000 --> 17:59.000 Sure, here we go. 18:00.000 --> 18:03.000 Oh, look at the poor thing. 18:04.000 --> 18:06.000 Yeah. Well, I'll clean him up a little. He'll be all right. 18:06.000 --> 18:07.000 George, what are you going to do with him? 18:08.000 --> 18:09.000 I wouldn't touch that bird if it laid golden eggs. 18:10.000 --> 18:11.000 All right, hold still there, have me. 18:11.000 --> 18:12.000 Now, Brooksie, listen. 18:12.000 --> 18:16.000 We got to find out once and for all if this bird really does have anything to do with all the crazy stuff going on here. 18:17.000 --> 18:18.000 You're sure hard to convince. 18:18.000 --> 18:19.000 Hey, hey, get off my coffee. 18:20.000 --> 18:22.000 If you're thirsty, boy, we'll get you a drink. 18:23.000 --> 18:24.000 Now, Brooksie, you go in the bar where Johnson is. 18:24.000 --> 18:28.000 Give me five minutes head start, then tell people I found the parrot and took off down the alley. 18:29.000 --> 18:32.000 Well, this is the only way to find out, isn't it? To see who comes after me. 18:32.000 --> 18:36.000 The bird itself can't have any value, but maybe somebody thinks it does. 18:36.000 --> 18:39.000 Oh, Brooksie, now look. 18:39.000 --> 18:42.000 Just because everybody who's been around this long-nosed chicken has gotten into trouble. 18:42.000 --> 18:43.000 All right, all right, I'll do it. 18:44.000 --> 18:46.000 There must be easier ways to find the end of a story. 18:48.000 --> 18:51.000 Okay, bird, let's get some of the grease off your feathers. 18:52.000 --> 18:53.000 Bird of El Oman, huh? 18:53.000 --> 18:54.000 Big mystery bird. 18:55.000 --> 18:56.000 Oh, you like that. 18:57.000 --> 19:00.000 Get yourself all stretched because in about five minutes we'll go outside and see if anybody meets us. 19:00.000 --> 19:03.000 We'll find out just how dangerous it is to hang on to you when you're... 19:03.000 --> 19:05.000 Brokken, brokken, brokken. 19:06.000 --> 19:07.000 Cut it out, cut it out, will you? 19:07.000 --> 19:08.000 Yeah, much better. 19:08.000 --> 19:12.000 Brokken, brokken, brokken, brokken. 19:13.000 --> 19:14.000 What? 19:15.000 --> 19:17.000 Hey, bird, snap out of it. What's the matter with you? 19:18.000 --> 19:20.000 Hey, Avnick, come on, boy, come on. 19:21.000 --> 19:22.000 There's nothing wrong. 19:24.000 --> 19:25.000 Oh, brother. 19:26.000 --> 19:27.000 Brokken, huh? 19:28.000 --> 19:29.000 Coffee. 19:30.000 --> 19:32.000 The coffee you took a drink of my coffee. 19:33.000 --> 19:34.000 Brooksie. 19:35.000 --> 19:36.000 Johnson, what? 19:36.000 --> 19:37.000 John. 19:50.000 --> 19:52.000 George, listen to me. Can't you hear me? 19:52.000 --> 19:54.000 Here, here, slap him with the wet towel some more. 19:54.000 --> 19:55.000 I'll do it, I'll do it, Captain. 19:55.000 --> 19:57.000 That stuff can't hurt him any. 19:57.000 --> 20:00.000 Get you and your crazy joint. Get out of here. 20:00.000 --> 20:02.000 All right, all right. 20:03.000 --> 20:05.000 You, you all drink that stuff too? 20:05.000 --> 20:06.000 George, here now, don't move. 20:07.000 --> 20:08.000 You told me five minutes. 20:08.000 --> 20:11.000 It was five minutes before anybody even started to look for you. 20:11.000 --> 20:13.000 Sure, sure, sure. Just me, huh? 20:13.000 --> 20:15.000 Just my coffee. We're not all dead, huh? 20:15.000 --> 20:17.000 Valentine, I regret to say. 20:17.000 --> 20:19.000 Never mind, never mind. I know. I lost it up again. 20:19.000 --> 20:22.000 An old-fashioned knockout drop. They keep them behind the bar. 20:22.000 --> 20:24.000 Naturally, they would in this kind of a place. 20:24.000 --> 20:25.000 Wait a minute, wait a minute. The bird. 20:25.000 --> 20:26.000 He's all right, George. 20:26.000 --> 20:28.000 And making a lot more sense than you are. 20:28.000 --> 20:30.000 Okay, Johnson, somebody dealt my coffee. 20:30.000 --> 20:32.000 Everybody had a chance. 20:32.000 --> 20:34.000 Everybody knew I was going to be here alone. 20:34.000 --> 20:37.000 But at least it proves that somebody right here, doesn't it? 20:37.000 --> 20:39.000 Hmm. You nominate the seaman? 20:39.000 --> 20:41.000 Yes, but why did this happen, George? 20:41.000 --> 20:43.000 We found you and the bird hadn't been touched. 20:43.000 --> 20:44.000 Hey, did you move me? 20:44.000 --> 20:45.000 What? 20:45.000 --> 20:46.000 Here, I'll help you get up. 20:46.000 --> 20:47.000 No, no, don't touch me. 20:47.000 --> 20:49.000 If it wasn't the bird they were after, it was me. 20:49.000 --> 20:52.000 Only why me? What have I got that they want? 20:52.000 --> 20:53.000 That hundred bucks. 20:53.000 --> 20:55.000 Look in your pocket. See what was taken. 20:55.000 --> 20:58.000 Yeah. I thought I had it in this pocket. 20:58.000 --> 20:59.000 Oh, the wallet's okay. 20:59.000 --> 21:01.000 Everything else? 21:01.000 --> 21:03.000 Sixty, seventy, eighty, ninety. 21:03.000 --> 21:04.000 That's all there. 21:04.000 --> 21:06.000 Oh, nobody'd commit crimes just for that amount of money anyway. 21:06.000 --> 21:08.000 No, no, of course not. So get on your feet. 21:08.000 --> 21:10.000 We start all over at the beginning. 21:10.000 --> 21:12.000 Johnson, I think, better on the floor. 21:12.000 --> 21:14.000 You know, all this business could be awfully simple. 21:14.000 --> 21:17.000 Sure, Hindus and parrots and sea captains and... 21:17.000 --> 21:19.000 This thing with me could be a mistake. 21:19.000 --> 21:21.000 Lyme could just have fallen down the stairs. 21:21.000 --> 21:23.000 The first guy we already know was just slugged and rolled. 21:23.000 --> 21:25.000 I think you'd better stand up, George. 21:25.000 --> 21:28.000 Okay. Too far-fetched, huh? 21:28.000 --> 21:31.000 But a desperate man might hope that's the way to go down. 21:31.000 --> 21:33.000 Like what man? Like why? 21:33.000 --> 21:34.000 What are you talking about? 21:34.000 --> 21:36.000 Captain Charlie's respectable, isn't he, Johnson? 21:36.000 --> 21:37.000 Honest and good with the police. 21:37.000 --> 21:38.000 That's right. For years. 21:38.000 --> 21:40.000 The same goes for the people he's kept under his wing. 21:40.000 --> 21:41.000 Morton, Lyme, Sadie. 21:41.000 --> 21:42.000 Sure, sure, sure. 21:42.000 --> 21:45.000 Charlie keeps the place clean, all right, only... 21:45.000 --> 21:46.000 What's that got to do with... 21:46.000 --> 21:47.000 All right, now listen. 21:47.000 --> 21:49.000 A foreign sailor comes in with a parrot last night 21:49.000 --> 21:51.000 and all blazes breaks loose. 21:51.000 --> 21:53.000 Everybody's imagination dives off in seven directions. 21:53.000 --> 21:56.000 It isn't imagination that the bird was involved in every crime, though, 21:56.000 --> 21:58.000 is it? Here with you, with Lyme, you took care of him, 21:58.000 --> 22:00.000 with the sailor who brought him in? 22:00.000 --> 22:02.000 Sure, and you get so wound up, you don't notice something else 22:02.000 --> 22:04.000 that was involved with everyone. 22:04.000 --> 22:05.000 What, George? 22:05.000 --> 22:07.000 The money that paid for the parrot. 22:07.000 --> 22:08.000 Huh? 22:08.000 --> 22:11.000 But you just said that dough in your pocket hadn't been touched. 22:11.000 --> 22:13.000 I thought I had it in the other pocket, that's all. 22:13.000 --> 22:15.000 But suppose while I was out, suppose the reason I was dope 22:15.000 --> 22:17.000 was to get at that money and do something with it. 22:17.000 --> 22:19.000 Now, look, if it's there, it's there. 22:19.000 --> 22:22.000 And that something was the last crime that needed to be done. 22:22.000 --> 22:24.000 From here on, the mysteries could stop. 22:24.000 --> 22:26.000 George, for heaven's sake, tell me... 22:26.000 --> 22:28.000 Okay, Angel, okay, words of one syllable. 22:28.000 --> 22:31.000 Suppose in this place one person isn't so respectable, 22:31.000 --> 22:34.000 being fooling Charlie along with everybody else for years. 22:34.000 --> 22:37.000 And last night, Lyme broke a door, a lock. 22:37.000 --> 22:40.000 Why would anybody lock a door around here, incidentally? 22:40.000 --> 22:41.000 But who were you... 22:41.000 --> 22:43.000 Because Charlie needed $25 more to make up the hundred 22:43.000 --> 22:45.000 the sailor wanted for his bird, remember? 22:45.000 --> 22:48.000 Well, Lyme got it all right. He found it in Morton's room. 22:48.000 --> 22:49.000 Well? 22:49.000 --> 22:51.000 Well, Johnson, from there on, one, two, three. 22:51.000 --> 22:53.000 Morton was mad, remember? 22:53.000 --> 22:55.000 But the sailor had already gone. 22:55.000 --> 22:57.000 Then the sailor was slugged and rolled. 22:57.000 --> 23:00.000 But if it was Morton, he couldn't find the money he wanted to get back. 23:00.000 --> 23:02.000 George, Lyme didn't have any money, so... 23:02.000 --> 23:03.000 Lyme was a weasel. 23:03.000 --> 23:06.000 Suppose he got to asking Morton about that money he took. 23:06.000 --> 23:08.000 Suppose he caught on to what I'm catching on to. 23:08.000 --> 23:11.000 So Morton killed him, scared to death of discovery now, 23:11.000 --> 23:13.000 with one accidental murder already to his credit. 23:13.000 --> 23:15.000 All right, then came me. 23:15.000 --> 23:18.000 Do you want to bet I was dope so that $25 of that hundred 23:18.000 --> 23:20.000 could be replaced with a different $25? 23:20.000 --> 23:22.000 Holy smoke. 23:22.000 --> 23:23.000 Sure, that's right. 23:23.000 --> 23:25.000 Replaced with genuine money. 23:25.000 --> 23:27.000 George, Morton's a printer, isn't he? 23:27.000 --> 23:29.000 You got it. His press must be in the locked room. 23:29.000 --> 23:30.000 He printed menus, remember? 23:30.000 --> 23:32.000 Green ones with pictures of Lincoln and Washington 23:32.000 --> 23:33.000 and people like that on them. 23:33.000 --> 23:35.000 That's the idea. 23:35.000 --> 23:36.000 And it explains everything. 23:36.000 --> 23:39.000 A counterfeiter trying to keep from being discovered. 23:39.000 --> 23:41.000 Well, come on, don't just stand there. 23:48.000 --> 23:49.000 Morton. 23:49.000 --> 23:50.000 Hey, Morton. 23:50.000 --> 23:52.000 He was here just a second ago. 23:52.000 --> 23:54.000 He ran upstairs when you came out of the kitchen. 23:54.000 --> 23:55.000 There he goes. 23:55.000 --> 23:56.000 Morton, stop! 23:56.000 --> 23:58.000 Sergeant, Sergeant, get in! 23:58.000 --> 23:59.000 Hold it, Angel. 23:59.000 --> 24:00.000 Let the police do the rest. 24:00.000 --> 24:03.000 Say, what's going on anyway? 24:03.000 --> 24:05.000 Look, ma'am, ain't this a lovely bird? 24:05.000 --> 24:09.000 You know, someday I'm going to get me a rubber plant and then... 24:17.000 --> 24:19.000 Oh, but George, even if Morton did commit those crimes, 24:19.000 --> 24:21.000 it still doesn't explain everything. 24:21.000 --> 24:23.000 There's still that tobacco-chewing seaman 24:23.000 --> 24:25.000 who fell off the roof and the parrot... 24:25.000 --> 24:27.000 Hey, hey, you didn't start this story, you'll did. 24:27.000 --> 24:29.000 So stick around a minute and I'll give him the rest of it. 24:37.000 --> 24:38.000 You're right, Brooksy. 24:38.000 --> 24:41.000 There are a lot of questions that still need answering. 24:41.000 --> 24:44.000 So, while George is getting his story straight, 24:44.000 --> 24:53.000 suppose we all give this story a listen. 24:59.000 --> 25:02.000 Yes, he was a counterfeiter, I understand. 25:02.000 --> 25:05.000 All he wanted was to get his $25 back. 25:05.000 --> 25:06.000 But the seaman, George, went... 25:06.000 --> 25:07.000 Oh, yes, yes, yes. 25:07.000 --> 25:09.000 The mysterious man chewing tobacco. 25:09.000 --> 25:11.000 Well, use a little logic. 25:11.000 --> 25:13.000 The sick, the foreigner who was so anxious to sell the bird in a hurry 25:13.000 --> 25:14.000 didn't speak English. 25:14.000 --> 25:16.000 Yes, that made it all the more... 25:16.000 --> 25:18.000 So where did his bird learn to say drop dead? 25:18.000 --> 25:19.000 Oh. 25:19.000 --> 25:23.000 Yeah, and every clue Yule gave me about him suggested the obvious. 25:23.000 --> 25:25.000 The sick had stolen the bird and was trying to sell quickly 25:25.000 --> 25:27.000 before the guy he stole it from caught up with him. 25:27.000 --> 25:29.000 You're telling from the hospital, huh? 25:29.000 --> 25:32.000 Well, this might not be all clairvoyance, but sure. 25:32.000 --> 25:34.000 The seaman didn't want to get mixed up in any trouble, 25:34.000 --> 25:36.000 but he still wanted his bird back. 25:36.000 --> 25:39.000 Huh, his bird. 25:39.000 --> 25:41.000 And that's all there was to... 25:41.000 --> 25:46.000 Oh, my beautiful, romantic story of the waterfront 25:46.000 --> 25:48.000 with all those strange characters... 25:48.000 --> 25:50.000 Watch it, watch it. 25:50.000 --> 25:52.000 Don't get carried away again. 25:52.000 --> 25:55.000 Oh, dear. My beautiful story. 25:55.000 --> 25:57.000 Anyway, cheer up, Mr. Yule. 25:57.000 --> 26:00.000 Maybe you could sell it to one of those mystery shows on the radio. 26:00.000 --> 26:16.000 Sure. Call it Drop Dead. 26:16.000 --> 26:19.000 Just in case we lost you somewhere along the way, 26:19.000 --> 26:22.000 George Valentine was played by Robert Bailey 26:22.000 --> 26:25.000 and Brooksie, played by Virginia Gregg. 26:25.000 --> 26:28.000 David Victor and Jackson Gillis wrote the tale, 26:28.000 --> 26:31.000 and Eddie Dunstetter played the music. 26:31.000 --> 26:33.000 Now, this is yours truly, 26:33.000 --> 26:36.000 inviting you to our next visit with Valentine, 26:36.000 --> 26:38.000 when you will again hear what happens 26:38.000 --> 27:07.000 when you let George do it. 27:08.000 --> 27:10.000 Thank you.