WEBVTT

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You are about to be entertained by some of the biggest names in show business.

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For the next hour and thirty minutes, this program will present in person such bright stars as...

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Fred Allen, Jack Carson,

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Portland Harper, Dennis King,

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Beatrice Lilly,

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Loris Merkel,

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Ed Wynn,

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the West Point Choir,

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Meredith Wilson,

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and my name darling is Tallulah Bankhens.

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The National Broadcasting Company presents The Big Show.

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The Big Show, ninety minutes with the most scintillating personalities in the world.

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The Big Show, ninety minutes with the most scintillating personalities in the entertainment world.

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Brought to you this Sunday and every Sunday at the same time as the Sunday feature of MDP's All-Star Festival.

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And here is your hostess, the glamorous, unpredictable Tallulah Bankhens.

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Well darling, a special show train brought our audience to see The Big Show.

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More than three thousand people came from and on the New Haven Railroad show train from

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Boston, Providence,

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Westinley, Hartford, Berlin, Meliden, Wallingford,

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New Haven, Bridgeport,

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Bridgeport, Westport, and Soggertuck, Norwalk, and South Norwalk, Darien, New London, and Stanford.

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Oh!

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And they're all here for an evening of laughs.

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Except two hundred and forty-three daily commuters who got off the train from force of habit

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and went to their offices.

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At Bridgeport you're not laughing, are you?

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These show trains are something new in show business.

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It used to be I would take a play to a theater in Boston.

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Now they bring Boston to me.

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Wait, when did she start fogging?

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Oh, what did you do about a show train?

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Well that's the trouble with a woman MC.

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But when do we get on the show?

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Well who knows, maybe she'll wave a green lantern.

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Yeah, where is the green lantern?

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Well the way that she turns around it's usually on the caboose.

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You know.

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There are Alan Jack Carson and Ed Wynn.

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Applause

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Did you hear what I was just saying, fellas?

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A whole train full of people coming from as far away as Boston just to see this show.

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Isn't it exciting?

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Well, isn't it?

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Are you gentlemen from Bridgeport?

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Tell her off, Jack.

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You leave it to me Fred, I can handle these birds.

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So you got an audience that came in on a show train.

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Big deal.

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You can't get an audience any other way, you railroad people into the theater.

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Laughter

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How's that, Fred?

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Good boy, Jack.

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Thank you.

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But Fred, darling, think of it.

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Three thousand people came here on a train just for this program.

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Tell Lula, it just goes to show you what people will do to get away from television.

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Laughter

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Oh, that was so good, Fred.

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I like that, what you just said.

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Well, thanks Ed, it's your turn. You get in there and tell her.

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Oh, I say, Michelle, I don't see what's so exciting about a show train.

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It's not a new idea, you know.

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No?

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Well, ten years ago I opened a show of mine in Boston.

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And twelve hundred people got up in the middle of the Frey Saks and took a train to New York.

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Laughter

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You fellows, yes, yes, yes, I forgot that wasn't silly. Anyway, however...

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You fellows just can't stand a woman being in a Mississippi's television and the biggest show on radio.

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Are you kidding? I'm through with radio. I've been promoted to television.

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Secondly, me too. I graduated out of radio long ago into television.

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Well, I've even graduated out of television.

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Laughter

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I'm in a new medium, social security.

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Laughter

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Why don't you fellows stop? I have seen you on television.

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Or should that be, I've seen you on television, why don't you fellows stop?

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Laughter

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So, Lula, what's the use of arguing? You know deep down in your larynx that all you can do with a radio is listen.

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But in television you can see a lot of action.

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I can see more action looking out of my window. Across the street there's plenty of action.

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And they don't stop every two minutes for a commercial.

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Laughter

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Well, they say they do commercials better on television, Tallulah.

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They say they do them better than they do on radio.

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When they fry a steak on television, you can actually smell it.

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That one's too easy, darling. I won't take advantage of it.

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Laughter

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Come on, Fred, you get in there and tell her.

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Well, I don't know much about television, but I would like to say a few words in favor of social security.

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Laughter

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And all I have to say to you, Tallulah, is you should live so long.

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Laughter

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Oh, thank you, darling. That's the youngest I've been on this program in months.

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And I hope all of you live long enough to see an act like this presented on television.

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It's the West Point Choir singing the Choir.

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A hundred and eighty cadets in full dress, brass buttons, white gloves.

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Get that on your television screen.

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And all in one act.

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That's right, darling, and I've met every one of them personally.

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Laughter

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Sometimes it seems a shame to take the money on the show.

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Laughter

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All right, gentlemen, I want you to meet alphabetically cadets Al, Alderman, Andrews, Atlam, Albertan.

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Applause

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Choir singing the Choir

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Choir singing the Choir

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Choir singing the Choir

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Choir singing the Choir

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Choir singing the Choir

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Choir singing the Choir

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Choir singing the Choir

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Choir singing the Choir

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Choir singing the Choir

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Choir singing the Choir

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Choir singing the Choir

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Choir singing the Choir

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Applause

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Wheeler, Wilson, Lipson, Dupont.

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There, I've mentioned every one of those cadets.

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What a wonderful day.

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Well, yes, they're all right for girls.

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For girls, they're all men.

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What's better for men than girls?

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Bridgeport, you're not laughing.

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And only a snicker from Westport and

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Westport, I could have gone to Westport, but I chose Banford instead.

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Banford, I'm sorry.

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I'm sorry.

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I'm sorry.

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I'm sorry.

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I'm sorry.

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I'm sorry.

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I'm sorry.

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I'm sorry.

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I'm sorry.

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I'm sorry.

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I'm sorry.

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I'm sorry.

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You'll be back.

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Sure, I'd still be there if I hadn't tried out for the swimming

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scene.

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Well, Jack, darling, you could never stand the rigors of

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Westport.

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Now, look, those boys told me that every morning they hiked, they

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grilled, they marched, all that before breakfast.

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So what?

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Look at me this morning.

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Must die, darling.

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I woke at 6, jumped out of bed, opened the front door,

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or picked up the newspaper with one hand, two bottles of milk

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and a pint of cream with the other and didn't drop a thing.

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What's so tremendous about that?

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No strength in my pajamas.

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Ha ha.

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Ha ha.

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Ha ha.

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Ha ha.

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Ha ha.

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Ha ha.

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A bridge force that was no time to love.

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Ha ha ha.

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Ha ha.

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Bill, um, I'd like to ask you a question.

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Yes, Doug.

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Yes.

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Yes.

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Don't answer until I ask you.

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Ha ha.

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How about you and me going out after the show, huh?

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Going out where, darling?

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Well, we could go anywhere.

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The Stork Club or, uh, my apartment.

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Or to El Morocco or...

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my apartment.

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Or to 21?

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Or my apartment?

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I heard the apartment, Jack.

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You said it three times.

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I have a three room apartment.

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You?

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Ha ha.

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If I got it all, Jack,

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I'd prefer going to the colony for dinner

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than to the theater and then to a night bar

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for some dancing.

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Oh, hello.

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That sounds wonderful.

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Look, you do that and I'll meet you at my apartment after.

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Ha ha ha.

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You must be joking.

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Bridgeport doesn't seem to agree with you.

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Ha ha ha.

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Well, here's somebody Bridgeport will agree with.

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My favorite actor just walked into the theater.

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One of Broadway's greatest, Mr. Dennis King.

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Ha ha ha.

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Ha ha ha.

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Ha ha ha.

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Ha ha ha.

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Ha ha ha.

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Ha ha ha.

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Ha ha ha.

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Ha ha ha.

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At the Goldmore Theater here in New York, darlings,

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the new play is providing great excitement.

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The play is Billy Budd, Lewis Cox and R.H. Chapman's

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dramatization of Herman Melville's classic novel of the sea.

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We are privileged to hear a scene from that play now,

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starring Dennis King and Billy Budd.

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["Billy Budd's Overture"]

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["Billy Budd's Overture"]

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["Billy Budd's Overture"]

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Billy Budd is the story of a young English seaman

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pressing to service aboard ATMS Indomitable,

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a British warship at sea against the French

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in the year 1798.

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It is not an ordinary story of war at sea,

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but of the subtle conflict between a man of natural goodness

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and simplicity and a petty tyrant of unnatural evil,

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alive with the merciless dictate of naval discipline.

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Billy Budd's violent reaction to injustice

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has resulted in the death of his tormentor.

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In Ireland, he awaits the verdict of the court martial

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being held in Captain Veer's cabin.

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Captain Veer, having witnessed the killing,

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highly sympathetic to Billy Budd's cause,

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feeling for him as he would for his own son,

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is forced nevertheless to intervene in the court martial

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as senior officer of the King,

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responsible to the Admiralty for the carrying out

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of naval law.

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As the scene opens, Captain Veer,

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portrayed by Dennis King, takes a hand

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in the deliberations of his junior officer.

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Have you anything to say, Mr. Radcliffe?

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Yes, sir.

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Claggett was killed because Budd couldn't speak.

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In the sense that he stammers, he's a cripple.

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You don't hang a man for that.

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He's speaking the only way he could.

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Mr. Wyatt?

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If we condemn him, it's the same thing as condoning the lie

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the Master-at-Arms clearly told.

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I'd have struck him too.

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Good.

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Then, gentlemen, as we agree, we can reach a verdict at once.

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Just a moment, gentlemen.

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Yes, Captain Veer.

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Hitherto I've been a witness at this trial no more,

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and I hesitate to interfere except at this clear crisis

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you ignore one fact we cannot close our eyes to.

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With your pardon, sir, as a senior member of this court,

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I must ask if you now act as our commanding officer

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or as a private man.

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As convening authority, Mr. Seymour,

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I summon this court.

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I must review its findings and approve them

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before they go to the Admiralty.

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Aye, aye, sir.

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That is your right.

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No right?

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Which of us here has rights?

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This is my duty, and I must perform it.

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Budd has killed a man, his superior officer.

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We have found a verdict, sir.

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Seymour, I know that.

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But we are not free to choose as though we were private citizens.

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The Admiralty has its code.

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You think it cares who Budd is, who you and I are?

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We don't forget it, sir, but surely Claggett's tales

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were simply lies.

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We've established that.

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Aye, but the mutinies of last year

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were brute facts and must not come again.

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If the men should think we're afraid...

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Captain, how could they?

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They certainly know Budd is no mutineer.

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Of course not.

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Since he came on board, he's done more to keep the crew in hand

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than any of us.

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That's true.

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The men took naturally to him.

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As officers, we are concerned to keep this ship effective as a weapon.

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And the law says what we must do in such a case as this.

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Now, come, you know the facts and the mutiny acts provisioned.

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At sea, in time of war, an enlisted man strikes his superior officer,

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and the blow is fatal.

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The mere blow alone would hang him.

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Well, then the men on board know that, as well as you and I.

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And we acquit him.

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The men have sense.

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They know the penalty to follow, and yet it does not follow.

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But they know Budd, sir, and Claggett too, I dare say.

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Would they not applaud the decision that frees Budd?

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They would thank us.

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String him to a yard arm, and they'll turn around and rescue him,

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and string us up instead.

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Aye, that's the point.

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It's twice as dangerous to hang the boys it would be to let him go.

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If there's a mutinous temper in the crew, sir, condemning Budd would surely set it off.

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That is possible.

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Whatever step we take, the risk is great, but it is ours.

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That is what makes us officers.

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If by our lawful rigor mutiny comes, there is no blame for us.

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But if in fear, miscalled a kind of mercy, we pardon Budd against specific order,

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and then the crew revolt, how culpable and weak our verdict would appear.

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What shame to us, and what a deadly blow to discipline.

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I concede that, sir, but this case is exceptional.

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And pity if we are men is bound to move us, Captain.

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So am I moved.

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Yet we cannot have warm hearts betraying heads that should be cool.

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In such a case, ashore, an upright judge does not allow the pleading tears of women to touch

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his nature.

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Here at sea, the heart, the female in a man, weeps like a woman.

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She must be ruled out, hard though it may be.

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Still silent.

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Conscience, perhaps.

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Your private conscience is moving.

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Aye, that's it, sir.

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How can we condemn this man and live at peace again within ourselves?

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We have our standards, ethics, if you like.

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You all feel I can see that in intent the boy is innocent.

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Does that count for nothing?

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His whole attitude, his motive, count for nothing?

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If his intent were intent or non-intentive, but is nothing to the purpose.

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In a court more merciful than Marshal's, it would extenuate and shall, at the last

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of sizes, set him free.

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But here we have these alternatives only.

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Condemn or let go.

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But it seems to me we've got to consider the problem as a moral one, sir, despite the

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fact that we are not moralists.

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The trager told you his lie.

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The case immediately went beyond the scope of military justice.

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I too feel that.

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But do these gold stripes across our arms attest that our allegiance is to nature?

17:12.520 --> 17:13.520
To the king, sir.

17:13.520 --> 17:14.520
I rat this.

17:14.520 --> 17:18.960
And though the sea be the element whereon we move and have our being assailant, is our

17:18.960 --> 17:21.280
official duty hence to nature?

17:21.280 --> 17:22.280
No.

17:22.280 --> 17:26.860
So little is there true that we resign our freedom when we put this on.

17:26.860 --> 17:32.360
And when war is declared, are we the fighters commissioned to destroy consulted first?

17:32.360 --> 17:37.640
What bitter salt leagues move between our codes and God's own judgment?

17:37.640 --> 17:41.280
We have conscripted everyone, upright in this uniform of flesh.

17:41.280 --> 17:44.760
There is no truth to war born in the womb.

17:44.760 --> 17:45.760
We fight at command.

17:45.760 --> 17:48.080
All I know is that I can't sit by and see Bud hang.

17:48.080 --> 17:53.040
I say we fight by order, by command of our superiors, and our duty lies in this, that

17:53.040 --> 17:55.960
we are servants only.

17:55.960 --> 17:57.360
The Admiralty doesn't want service like that.

17:57.360 --> 17:58.360
What good would it do?

17:58.360 --> 17:59.360
Who'd profit by Bud's death?

17:59.360 --> 18:01.360
Dear, deny us the right to act like men.

18:01.360 --> 18:02.360
You want to make us murderers?

18:02.360 --> 18:03.360
Wyatt, control yourself.

18:03.360 --> 18:05.200
What is this vessel you serve in, Wyatt?

18:05.200 --> 18:06.920
An arc of peace?

18:06.920 --> 18:07.920
Go count a gun.

18:07.920 --> 18:10.120
Then tell your conscience to lie quiet if you can.

18:10.120 --> 18:11.120
But that is war.

18:11.120 --> 18:12.280
This would be downright killing.

18:12.280 --> 18:13.280
It's all war, Ratcliffe.

18:13.280 --> 18:14.880
War to the death for all of us.

18:14.880 --> 18:16.440
Now you see that, Seymour?

18:16.440 --> 18:17.920
That this war began before our time.

18:17.920 --> 18:20.120
And will end long after it.

18:20.120 --> 18:22.120
Couldn't we mitigate the penalty if we convict?

18:22.120 --> 18:24.520
No, Ratcliffe, the penalty is prescribed.

18:24.520 --> 18:27.240
Oh, I'd like to think it over, Captain.

18:27.240 --> 18:30.160
I realize the private conscience moves you and I onward.

18:30.160 --> 18:33.160
But here we have the Mutiny Act for justice.

18:33.160 --> 18:38.120
No child can own a closer, tighter parent than can that act to what it stems from.

18:38.120 --> 18:39.120
War.

18:39.120 --> 18:41.640
War has no business with anything but services.

18:41.640 --> 18:45.240
War's child, the Mutiny Act, is featured like the father.

18:45.240 --> 18:46.240
Aye, sir.

18:46.240 --> 18:48.360
Could you stand Bud's murder on your conscience?

18:48.360 --> 18:49.360
Wyatt, hold your tongue.

18:49.360 --> 18:50.360
What do you want of us?

18:50.360 --> 18:51.360
Let him speak.

18:51.360 --> 18:54.040
I won't bear a hand to hang a man I know is innocent.

18:54.040 --> 18:56.000
My blood's not cold enough.

18:56.000 --> 18:59.520
I can't give the kind of judgment you want to force on us.

18:59.520 --> 19:02.360
I ask to be excused from sitting upon this board.

19:02.360 --> 19:03.360
You know what you're saying.

19:03.360 --> 19:05.160
Sit down and hold your tongue.

19:05.160 --> 19:08.600
The kind of judgment I ask of you is only this, Wyatt.

19:08.600 --> 19:11.680
That you recognize your function in this ship.

19:11.680 --> 19:16.040
Can't you see that you must first strip off the uniform you wear and after that your flesh

19:16.040 --> 19:18.320
before you can escape the catered issue here?

19:18.320 --> 19:20.280
Decide you must, Wyatt.

19:20.280 --> 19:21.280
We are the law.

19:21.280 --> 19:23.840
Law orders us to act and shows us how.

19:23.840 --> 19:29.400
Do you imagine Seymour or Ratcliffe or I would not save this boy if he could see a way

19:29.400 --> 19:31.360
consistent with our duties?

19:31.360 --> 19:33.560
Quit Bud if you can.

19:33.560 --> 19:36.800
Show us how to save him without putting aside our function.

19:36.800 --> 19:43.960
Or if you can't do that, teach us how to put by our responsibility and not betray ourselves.

19:43.960 --> 19:44.960
Can you do this?

19:44.960 --> 19:45.960
Speak, man, speak.

19:45.960 --> 19:46.960
Show us how.

19:46.960 --> 19:56.040
Save him, Wyatt, and you save us all.

19:56.040 --> 20:01.520
You recognize the logic of the choice I force upon you.

20:01.520 --> 20:06.120
But do not think me pitiless in this demanding sentence on a luckless boy.

20:06.120 --> 20:13.240
I feel as you do for him, but even more, I feel there is a grace of soul in him that

20:13.240 --> 20:21.200
shall forgive the law we bind him with and pity us stretched upon the cross of choice.

20:21.200 --> 20:26.920
Well, gentlemen, will you decide?

20:26.920 --> 20:36.520
Gentlemen, have you reached a decision?

20:36.520 --> 20:39.280
He is condemned, sir.

20:39.280 --> 20:42.280
So be it.

20:42.280 --> 21:01.560
All is best for you, dear darling, till we fall.

21:12.280 --> 21:20.840
Dennis King, our congratulations on the stirring performance and the scene from your new Broadway

21:20.840 --> 21:22.720
success, Billy Budd.

21:22.720 --> 21:29.040
And thanks also to Martin Blaine, Horace Brim, and Gerald Moore, who so ably assisted you.

21:29.040 --> 21:32.880
Dennis, darling, I'm so glad you were able to come over for me tonight.

21:32.880 --> 21:34.360
Don't think no more about it, Hulure.

21:34.360 --> 21:35.920
I came the moment I got your call.

21:35.920 --> 21:38.520
Ah, you're so sweet.

21:38.520 --> 21:41.640
And while you're here, Dennis, darling, may I ask one more?

21:41.640 --> 21:44.680
No, please don't degrade yourself, Hulure, by asking me.

21:44.680 --> 21:46.800
I'd be only too happy to do it.

21:46.800 --> 21:48.680
I do what?

21:48.680 --> 21:55.120
Ladies and gentlemen, I'm happy to appear on this benefit for Miss Bankhead, who has

21:55.120 --> 21:58.360
been absent from the Broadway stage for lo these many...

21:58.360 --> 21:59.800
Benefits?

21:59.800 --> 22:01.080
Benefits of whom?

22:01.080 --> 22:03.040
Courage, my dear, courage, courage, courage, darling.

22:03.040 --> 22:06.600
I know it's a harsh word, but it's no reflection on you as an artist.

22:06.600 --> 22:11.920
At some point in our careers, we must all face the vegetabels of the... the vagaries

22:11.920 --> 22:12.920
of the tears.

22:12.920 --> 22:17.920
I can't pronounce it either.

22:17.920 --> 22:22.160
The vicissitudes of fortune.

22:22.160 --> 22:25.000
But Dennis, I am not faking anything.

22:25.000 --> 22:26.400
I know, my darling.

22:26.400 --> 22:28.960
The future always seems bleak at a time like this, now, cut it.

22:28.960 --> 22:34.600
Now, ladies and gentlemen, in raising this son tonight for an artist, whom I imagine

22:34.600 --> 22:41.880
many of you are too young to remember, I appeal to you as an old friend of Miss Bankhead,

22:41.880 --> 22:48.240
or to put it more accurately, Miss Bankhead, of an old friend of mine.

22:48.240 --> 22:50.640
Dennis, what are you doing?

22:50.640 --> 22:56.000
Ladies and gentlemen, ladies and gentlemen, go back with me in time to the halcyon days

22:56.000 --> 23:03.040
of the theater, when this fine actress, who has known better matinees, gave to the theater-going

23:03.040 --> 23:06.360
public some of the finest performances of yesteryear.

23:06.360 --> 23:09.560
This grand old lady of the...

23:09.560 --> 23:17.440
Who once was the star of Little Foxes, now finds the wolf at her door.

23:17.440 --> 23:24.960
Oh, if you can't remember her as the great actress she was, try to think of her as a

23:24.960 --> 23:25.960
human being.

23:25.960 --> 23:26.960
I wait.

23:26.960 --> 23:35.320
A lady who in her declining years finds herself in a declining, declining medium.

23:35.320 --> 23:41.760
Oh, the shame, the ignominy, the degradation, the thickness of taste, the loneliness of

23:41.760 --> 23:42.760
it all.

23:42.760 --> 23:43.760
Bridgeport, you're not laughing.

23:43.760 --> 23:44.760
You're not crying, Bridgeport.

23:44.760 --> 23:56.000
You, ladies and gentlemen, give to this, this little lady, who in better days brought joy

23:56.000 --> 24:01.800
to your hearts and who now is reduced to asking for a little of that joy for herself.

24:01.800 --> 24:04.160
Now, follow my example.

24:04.160 --> 24:07.640
I will myself start the ball rolling with three dollars.

24:07.640 --> 24:14.440
Wait just a minute, but sir, who told you I needed a benefit?

24:14.440 --> 24:16.400
Well, it seemed rather obnoxious, my dear.

24:16.400 --> 24:18.000
Nobody in the theater has seen you in months.

24:18.000 --> 24:20.920
Your name hasn't been on any theater marquee in a year or more.

24:20.920 --> 24:23.280
Your picture was removed from the wall at Sardis.

24:23.280 --> 24:27.960
You're made at the Theater Guild is marked Address Unknown.

24:27.960 --> 24:28.960
Address Unknown?

24:28.960 --> 24:33.200
Why, I've been on a big show in radio.

24:33.200 --> 24:34.200
Oh, radio.

24:34.200 --> 24:37.200
Well, no wonder we never heard of you.

24:37.200 --> 24:38.200
Quick.

24:38.200 --> 24:39.200
That was spontaneous.

24:39.200 --> 24:40.200
Very expert, very marvelous.

24:40.200 --> 24:43.200
But I'll tell, I'll tell the old crowd I found you.

24:43.200 --> 24:46.200
Now, naturally, I won't tell them what I picked you up.

24:46.200 --> 24:51.200
My darling, you can tell them I am the star of the big show.

24:51.200 --> 24:54.200
The biggest show in radio.

24:54.200 --> 25:03.200
I am known as the glamorous, unpredictable, and wealthy Tallulah Bansley.

25:03.200 --> 25:09.200
My salary on the radio runs into thousands of dollars a week.

25:09.200 --> 25:10.200
Really?

25:10.200 --> 25:14.200
You make all that money by merely talking through this tall, thin, metallic contrivance?

25:14.200 --> 25:18.200
Oh, my darling, more than I ever made in the theater.

25:18.200 --> 25:19.200
Well, what do you know?

25:19.200 --> 25:21.200
Tallulah, may I speak to you for a moment?

25:21.200 --> 25:22.200
Oh, of course, darling.

25:22.200 --> 25:24.200
Darling, have you got a dollar for a cup of coffee?

25:24.200 --> 25:27.200
I haven't got a, I haven't eaten in weeks, dear.

25:27.200 --> 25:28.200
Really?

25:28.200 --> 25:31.200
Awful, of course, my darling.

25:31.200 --> 25:39.200
And ladies and gentlemen, in this fine old gentleman who most of you I massive are too

25:39.200 --> 25:44.200
young to remember as a vagabond king, is now a vagabond himself.

25:44.200 --> 25:51.200
And I would like to start the ball rolling with two dollars and twenty cents.

26:14.200 --> 26:32.200
Long may nature sing while we're young.

26:32.200 --> 26:39.200
Every day is spring while we're young.

26:39.200 --> 26:45.200
And every juice finds life a man.

26:45.200 --> 26:52.200
Too deep to look and too sweet to laugh.

26:52.200 --> 26:59.200
Though it may be just for today.

26:59.200 --> 27:07.200
Share our lovely love while we may.

27:07.200 --> 27:14.200
Soar to the sky, fall sweet surprise.

27:14.200 --> 27:40.200
Just before our eyes while we're young.

27:40.200 --> 27:47.200
Soar to the sky, fall sweet surprise.

27:47.200 --> 27:52.200
Just before our eyes while we're young.

27:52.200 --> 27:57.200
Soar to the sky, fall sweet surprise.

27:57.200 --> 28:03.200
Just before our eyes while we're young.

28:03.200 --> 28:22.200
Soar to the sky, fall sweet surprise.

28:22.200 --> 28:26.200
We'll be back in a moment with all our other stars, but first darlings, I would like to

28:26.200 --> 28:49.200
ring my chimes. This is NBC's The National Broadcasting Company.

28:49.200 --> 28:54.200
The Big Show. This is The National Broadcasting Company's Sunday extravaganza

28:54.200 --> 28:57.200
with the most scintillating personalities in show business.

28:57.200 --> 29:02.200
The Big Show, the Sunday night feature of NBC's All-Star Festival, is brought to you by

29:02.200 --> 29:08.200
RCA Victor, world leader in radio, first in recorded music, first in television.

29:08.200 --> 29:15.200
By Chesterfield, the cigarette that has, for you, mildness with no unpleasant aftertaste.

29:15.200 --> 29:18.200
The cigarette that brings you Bing Crosby and Bob Hope.

29:18.200 --> 29:24.200
And by the makers of Anison for fast relief from pains of headache, neuritis, and neuralgia.

29:24.200 --> 29:30.200
The big stars of this program are Fred Allen, Jack Carson, Dennis King, Portland Hopper,

29:30.200 --> 29:36.200
Beatrice Lilly, Lawrence Melchior, Ed Wind, Meredith Wilson, and his Big Show orchestra and chorus.

29:36.200 --> 29:43.200
And every week, your hostess, the glamorous, unpredictable Tallulah Bankhead.

29:43.200 --> 29:51.200
The Big Show!

29:51.200 --> 29:57.200
Applause

29:57.200 --> 30:01.200
Well, darlings, The Big Show is back in New York after a week in Hollywood.

30:01.200 --> 30:05.200
And with all due respect to our friends on the West Coast,

30:05.200 --> 30:10.200
it is a pleasure to come back to this large, beautiful Center Theater,

30:10.200 --> 30:15.200
which is spacious enough to accommodate our audience of 3,000 people

30:15.200 --> 30:21.200
who came here tonight on the New Haven Railroad Show train from as far away as Boston.

30:21.200 --> 30:23.200
Applause

30:23.200 --> 30:30.200
Well, darlings, bless you, darlings, the studio we had in Hollywood was very small.

30:30.200 --> 30:37.200
We held only 300 people, and they were packed in so tight I had trouble reading my script.

30:37.200 --> 30:41.200
And that studio where they were breathing on my glasses or something that I missed out here,

30:41.200 --> 30:46.200
and that studio was so small and had such a low ceiling,

30:46.200 --> 30:51.200
when I ordered frog legs for lunch, the frog legs were squatting.

30:51.200 --> 30:52.200
That's a jolly one.

30:52.200 --> 30:54.200
Don't be really busy.

30:54.200 --> 31:02.200
Applause

31:02.200 --> 31:07.200
Why, Lulu Taberkinhead?

31:07.200 --> 31:13.200
Well, Lady Keele, the bee, darling, has been aging since I've seen you.

31:13.200 --> 31:15.200
Let me look at you.

31:15.200 --> 31:17.200
But you know, I haven't seen you in years, Tallulah.

31:17.200 --> 31:21.200
Let me look at you.

31:21.200 --> 31:24.200
Well, imagine that.

31:24.200 --> 31:26.200
I can hardly believe it.

31:26.200 --> 31:28.200
Oh, no.

31:28.200 --> 31:31.200
Poor dear.

31:31.200 --> 31:33.200
Well, that's the way it goes.

31:33.200 --> 31:35.200
Well, time marches on.

31:35.200 --> 31:38.200
Darling, you look simply adorable.

31:38.200 --> 31:41.200
Well, I was just thinking how extraordinarily well you look at Tallulah.

31:41.200 --> 31:46.200
Well, have a day or two of rest, then you'll be your old self.

31:46.200 --> 31:49.200
My dear, you're always your old self.

31:49.200 --> 31:54.200
Ah, you're sweet.

31:54.200 --> 31:57.200
Well, now we've exhausted ourselves, let's talk about something new.

31:57.200 --> 32:00.200
You know, I've just got back. What's the gossip around town?

32:00.200 --> 32:01.200
Gossip?

32:01.200 --> 32:06.200
Darling, if I got gossip for you, beauty, you know, I just got back from Hollywood and I heard...

32:06.200 --> 32:11.200
Oh, by the way, before I forget, Tallulah, I ran across Noah last week and he told me to be sure to...

32:11.200 --> 32:12.200
Oh, no, all right, darling.

32:12.200 --> 32:16.200
Of course, I just saw him last month at a party at the home of, oh, what's his name?

32:16.200 --> 32:17.200
You mean Jeffrey?

32:17.200 --> 32:18.200
Yes.

32:18.200 --> 32:19.200
The man we met on the Riviera.

32:19.200 --> 32:23.200
Do you remember, darling, when he came in that night full of...

32:23.200 --> 32:24.200
Oh, that's the one.

32:24.200 --> 32:27.200
Oh, do you remember what happened?

32:27.200 --> 32:34.200
I'll never forget the way she...

32:34.200 --> 32:39.200
You know, after that, he went to the hospital for six months.

32:39.200 --> 32:45.200
Oh, be he, I'm so sure.

32:45.200 --> 32:49.200
Well, so much for frivolous gossip. Let's get down to something serious.

32:49.200 --> 32:52.200
How is the mail situation around town?

32:52.200 --> 32:53.200
Oh, didn't you hear?

32:53.200 --> 32:54.200
No.

32:54.200 --> 32:58.200
They've cut down deliveries to one today.

32:58.200 --> 33:01.200
No, we're not talking about the same post office, Tallulah.

33:01.200 --> 33:03.200
I mean men.

33:03.200 --> 33:08.200
Oh, men. Well, darling, we have the biggest crop of magnificent men in this town.

33:08.200 --> 33:10.200
It's had in years.

33:10.200 --> 33:11.200
Why, only...

33:11.200 --> 33:12.200
Only what?

33:12.200 --> 33:15.200
Well, there's a new thing that's coming to fashion, darling.

33:15.200 --> 33:18.200
Men seem to like very young girls.

33:18.200 --> 33:20.200
Ooh.

33:20.200 --> 33:22.200
35.

33:22.200 --> 33:25.200
Well, I got here just in time.

33:25.200 --> 33:31.200
Of course you did, darling. We can double date.

33:31.200 --> 33:35.200
Now, let me see, be he, I forget now.

33:35.200 --> 33:37.200
Just what type of man do you prefer?

33:37.200 --> 33:42.200
Tall, or short, fat, or thin, old or young, dark or fair?

33:42.200 --> 33:43.200
Yes.

33:43.200 --> 33:45.200
Just my type too.

33:45.200 --> 33:47.200
Oh, well, that's plenty of dates.

33:47.200 --> 33:51.200
Well, any of the men you've been going out with, Tallulah, are all right with me.

33:51.200 --> 33:54.200
Well, as a matter of fact, I've been so busy lately, darling.

33:54.200 --> 33:58.200
I've been more or less relaxing, you know.

33:58.200 --> 34:01.200
I've taken up knitting.

34:01.200 --> 34:07.200
I've just finished the most darling slip-over of my ice box.

34:07.200 --> 34:09.200
A cardigan, of course.

34:09.200 --> 34:12.200
It's so much easier, you know, to open the door.

34:12.200 --> 34:17.200
You have no idea how relaxing an evening can be just knitting.

34:17.200 --> 34:19.200
Well, of course you were here over a gay time,

34:19.200 --> 34:21.200
and I'm sure we'll find plenty of men to take it out.

34:21.200 --> 34:26.200
So, don't you worry, darling. I'll see that you're kept busy.

34:26.200 --> 34:32.200
Hmm. Tell me, darling, is it difficult to learn to knit?

34:32.200 --> 34:35.200
Why, be, darling, you sound positively unhappy.

34:35.200 --> 34:36.200
Yes, I'm miserable.

34:36.200 --> 34:39.200
Oh, how delightful. Who is he?

34:39.200 --> 34:42.200
Walt. Walt, my dear, a past tense.

34:42.200 --> 34:45.200
Well, who is he?

34:45.200 --> 34:49.200
The Walt be a man you met in England. Tell us about it, won't you, darling?

34:49.200 --> 34:51.200
I'll be glad to.

34:51.200 --> 34:54.200
But gracious, what about the team you have to go through here

34:54.200 --> 34:58.200
before she lets you sing one lousy little number?

34:58.200 --> 35:06.200
Life is a journey, they tell us.

35:06.200 --> 35:10.200
A journey right through to the end.

35:10.200 --> 35:19.200
And just like an everyday journey, it's nicer to go with a friend.

35:19.200 --> 35:26.200
We all need a traveling companion to help us along as they can.

35:26.200 --> 35:30.200
A man needs the help of a woman.

35:30.200 --> 35:35.200
A woman needs the help of a man.

35:35.200 --> 35:44.200
Now I've found a traveling companion, one whom I thought was my own.

35:44.200 --> 35:47.200
How gaily we started.

35:47.200 --> 35:58.200
Now I'm brokenhearted and making the journey alone.

35:58.200 --> 36:02.200
I was happy, oh so happy, and ready to depart.

36:02.200 --> 36:07.200
So I smiled at my companion, said, well, shall we start?

36:07.200 --> 36:14.200
And then a sticky label was slapped across my heart.

36:14.200 --> 36:19.200
Not wanted on the boy.

36:19.200 --> 36:24.200
It could have been so happy. It could have been so blind.

36:24.200 --> 36:29.200
We could have looked out of the porthole and been happy all the time.

36:29.200 --> 36:32.200
I planned to be his traveling rug.

36:32.200 --> 36:42.200
And now I find that I'm not wanted on the voyage.

36:42.200 --> 36:44.200
Why am I left at the quayside?

36:44.200 --> 36:47.200
Why does my world seem so dark?

36:47.200 --> 36:50.200
Why can't I get where I'm going?

36:50.200 --> 36:54.200
I can't even get off the mark.

36:54.200 --> 36:57.200
I had a lot of little parcels.

36:57.200 --> 37:00.200
Our friends, our hopes, our fears.

37:00.200 --> 37:06.200
A whole load full of laughter and a suitcase full of tears.

37:06.200 --> 37:14.200
But fate, that cruel American express man, just points at me and jeers,

37:14.200 --> 37:19.200
you're not wanted on the voyage.

37:19.200 --> 37:25.200
I'm going, I'm going, I'm going, I'm going, I'm going.

37:25.200 --> 37:29.200
Does the road wind uphill all the way?

37:29.200 --> 37:33.200
Yes, to the very end.

37:33.200 --> 37:37.200
Is there a long, long trail of winding?

37:37.200 --> 37:40.200
Yes, there is.

37:40.200 --> 37:43.200
Does he travel fast? Does he travel alone?

37:43.200 --> 37:47.200
Apparently.

37:47.200 --> 37:51.200
Then what about her? What about she?

37:51.200 --> 37:54.200
I asked the station clock, dear old clock.

37:54.200 --> 37:57.200
It didn't answer.

37:57.200 --> 38:00.200
I asked the station approach.

38:00.200 --> 38:02.200
It didn't answer.

38:02.200 --> 38:06.200
And then I asked him.

38:06.200 --> 38:12.200
He answered in one, two, three, four, five, maybe a half a dozen words.

38:12.200 --> 38:16.200
I was amazed.

38:16.200 --> 38:19.200
But I laughed. I thought him joking.

38:19.200 --> 38:22.200
I said, oh, shh, don't be absurd.

38:22.200 --> 38:28.200
He showed me what was written, and I read it word by word.

38:28.200 --> 38:31.200
I wasn't traveling with him.

38:31.200 --> 38:35.200
I wasn't even traveling alone.

38:35.200 --> 38:40.200
I was not wanted on the voyage.

38:40.200 --> 38:46.200
The draft was hard and bitter. I could not drink the cup, and yet I had to swallow it.

38:46.200 --> 38:49.200
Yes, down to the last suck.

38:49.200 --> 38:57.200
There had been a weekend ruck sack, and then to finish up, not wanted on the voyage, I asked you.

38:57.200 --> 39:01.200
Well, friends have been kind and consoling.

39:01.200 --> 39:04.200
There's nothing they say they won't do.

39:04.200 --> 39:13.200
But they've all got their own traveling companion, and they are sticking to them like glue.

39:13.200 --> 39:18.200
They say, you must go forward. Don't let your footsteps lag.

39:18.200 --> 39:25.200
But the memory of that moment pulls me backwards like a drag.

39:25.200 --> 39:32.200
His gentle voice saying, Porter, just label that old bag.

39:32.200 --> 39:35.200
Not wanted on the voyage.

39:35.200 --> 39:48.200
Not wanted on the voyage.

39:48.200 --> 40:02.200
Here's a word from RCA Victor.

40:02.200 --> 40:07.200
There's nothing more fun these winter nights than curling up in front of a good warm television set

40:07.200 --> 40:13.200
and let the laugh, chuckles, and downright merriment of television entertainment warm the cockles of your heart.

40:13.200 --> 40:19.200
And if there's one thing that's more fun than just plain television, it's television on a new RCA Victor set.

40:19.200 --> 40:25.200
Yes, almost two million families today are happily using RCA Victor television in their homes.

40:25.200 --> 40:32.200
And you'll know why when you watch the lifelike picture on RCA Victor's new model, the Kent, now on display at your RCA Victor dealers.

40:32.200 --> 40:41.200
The Kent brings you clear, big, 17-inch pictures locked in place by RCA Victor's exclusive eyewitness picture synchronizer.

40:41.200 --> 40:44.200
Then, too, look at the value of the Kent.

40:44.200 --> 40:48.200
It's like having console television at table model price.

40:48.200 --> 40:56.200
You'll say that RCA Victor television is the best way to warm up your heart with television fun and keep the frost off your pocketbook.

40:56.200 --> 41:13.200
Excuse me, but where do I get my money back on this round-trip ticket from Boston?

41:13.200 --> 41:15.200
What is your problem, Fred Allen?

41:15.200 --> 41:21.200
Well, I tried all week to get a ticket to the big show tonight, but there wasn't one to be had all over New York.

41:21.200 --> 41:27.200
So I flew up to Boston and bought a round-trip ticket on the show train, and that's how I get in.

41:27.200 --> 41:34.200
Oh, Fred, darling, you didn't have to go to all that trouble to fly up to Boston by plane.

41:34.200 --> 41:37.200
Well, I didn't fly by plane to Lula.

41:37.200 --> 41:41.200
There's a man over at LaGuardia Field now with a new service.

41:41.200 --> 41:49.200
You stand on the runway with two hands full of large nails, and up in Boston there's a fellow with a big magnet.

41:49.200 --> 41:52.200
If you're flying to Boston, it's the only way to travel.

41:52.200 --> 41:55.200
If you like privacy, if you want to be alone, it's the only thing to do.

41:55.200 --> 41:56.200
Well, Fred, now that you've...

41:56.200 --> 41:58.200
Don't have anything in your pocket at the time.

41:58.200 --> 42:01.200
Yes, dear, did I miss anything important?

42:01.200 --> 42:06.200
Now that you've retired from radio and television, what do you do to keep busy?

42:06.200 --> 42:14.200
Well, retired is rather a delicate way to put it, to Lula. Let us just say I was not wanted on the voyage.

42:14.200 --> 42:22.200
No, there's really...there's really a lot to do here in New York.

42:22.200 --> 42:25.200
I manage to keep pretty busy, as a matter of fact.

42:25.200 --> 42:33.200
I get up every morning about 10 o'clock and go over to see my doctor. He hasn't been feeling well lately.

42:33.200 --> 42:37.200
Then for lunch I go over to Lindy's and meet the boys.

42:37.200 --> 42:43.200
I order a lean corned beef sandwich and sit there and chew the fat for a while.

42:43.200 --> 42:48.200
Well, I'm surprised you found time to come over here at all this week, Fred.

42:48.200 --> 42:54.200
Well, in all deference to your charms and your concentrated aloe, Miss Bankhead,

42:54.200 --> 42:58.200
I really came over because Portland asked me to meet her here.

42:58.200 --> 43:01.200
She has a bit of a problem which she hopes to...

43:01.200 --> 43:02.200
Hello, Mr. Atlin.

43:02.200 --> 43:06.200
So, Portland, you made me split an infinitive.

43:06.200 --> 43:11.200
I shall never be able to go back to Boston. I've split an infinitive. I'll have to...

43:11.200 --> 43:12.200
Portland Hoffer!

43:12.200 --> 43:23.200
Hello, Miss Bankhead. Mr. Allen, did you tell Miss Bankhead why I'm here?

43:23.200 --> 43:28.200
No, I didn't have the heart to tell her, Portland. As a matter of fact, I didn't have a line either.

43:28.200 --> 43:33.200
Well, Miss Bankhead, my name is Portland Hoffer.

43:33.200 --> 43:35.200
I know who you are, darling.

43:35.200 --> 43:38.200
Please, Miss Bankhead, I have a speech prepared.

43:38.200 --> 43:40.200
Oh, I'm sorry, darling.

43:40.200 --> 43:42.200
My name is Portland Hoffer.

43:42.200 --> 43:47.200
You sound like Dagmar tonight. That line wasn't worth reading twice.

43:47.200 --> 43:48.200
Yeah.

43:48.200 --> 43:55.200
I have always been an admirer of yours, and I have been chosen by my school alumni association

43:55.200 --> 44:02.200
to portray you to Luna Bankhead in a play to be presented well...

44:02.200 --> 44:04.200
Exclamation point.

44:04.200 --> 44:06.200
You can imagine how thrilled I was...

44:06.200 --> 44:07.200
Comma.

44:07.200 --> 44:09.200
...when they told me I could portray you.

44:09.200 --> 44:10.200
Period.

44:10.200 --> 44:14.200
I've been so excited all week. I've had indigestion.

44:14.200 --> 44:18.200
Colon.

44:18.200 --> 44:21.200
I haven't been able to eat half my meal.

44:21.200 --> 44:23.200
Semicolon.

44:23.200 --> 44:27.200
Well, darling, if you quite finished dictating that letter, I wish you'd get to the point.

44:27.200 --> 44:30.200
Do you want me to come and play the part?

44:30.200 --> 44:34.200
Oh, no. I want to stand on my own two legs.

44:34.200 --> 44:38.200
Forenthesis.

44:38.200 --> 44:41.200
I've been trying all week to copy your voice.

44:41.200 --> 44:43.200
Yeah, I agree.

44:43.200 --> 44:47.200
Ah, isn't she sweet?

44:47.200 --> 44:53.200
Well, Miss Portland, that isn't even a reasonable facsimile. But then, who is?

44:53.200 --> 44:57.200
You're so right, Frederick. You took the words right out of my mouth.

44:57.200 --> 45:03.200
Well, I'm so sorry, Tallulah. Your mouth was open and there were so many of them there.

45:03.200 --> 45:08.200
I tried every way to make my voice sound that low, but it doesn't work.

45:08.200 --> 45:09.200
No.

45:09.200 --> 45:12.200
I tried pasting down my Adam's apple with Scotch tape.

45:12.200 --> 45:14.200
And that didn't do it?

45:14.200 --> 45:15.200
No.

45:15.200 --> 45:21.200
Then I tried wetting my hair and standing in front of an open window, hoping I'd get laryngitis.

45:21.200 --> 45:27.200
Yes, I know, darling. I lose more imitators that way.

45:27.200 --> 45:32.200
But, go on, Portland. What happened when you stood in front of the open window with your wet hair?

45:32.200 --> 45:34.200
Did your voice sound like Tallulah's?

45:34.200 --> 45:38.200
No, but my hair looked like hers.

45:38.200 --> 45:41.200
Well, Tallulah, those are the ball facts.

45:41.200 --> 45:46.200
Now, can you...can you help Portland out with her problem?

45:46.200 --> 45:50.200
Well, Fred, I'll do anything I can, darling, for you and for Portland.

45:50.200 --> 45:54.200
But what is the reason for this play? I mean, why are you doing it at all?

45:54.200 --> 45:59.200
Well, we want to raise some money to buy equipment for our school basketball team.

45:59.200 --> 46:03.200
Oh, what kind of equipment are you going to buy for your basketball team?

46:03.200 --> 46:08.200
A center, a guard, and two referees.

46:08.200 --> 46:11.200
Why, Portland, is that cricket?

46:11.200 --> 46:14.200
No, it's basketball.

46:14.200 --> 46:17.200
Our school hasn't won a game for 20 years.

46:17.200 --> 46:20.200
This would give our team a new lease on life.

46:20.200 --> 46:25.200
Say, Portland, you go around buying referees, and that's exactly what you'll get.

46:25.200 --> 46:27.200
20 years to life.

46:27.200 --> 46:45.200
Here, darlings, are two very good friends of ours, Bing Cosby and Bob Hope.

46:45.200 --> 46:48.200
Bob, do you realize we only have one thing in common?

46:48.200 --> 46:51.200
Hardly enough for a happy marriage, is it? What's that, Bing?

46:51.200 --> 46:53.200
Chesterfields, of course. We both like them, we both sell them.

46:53.200 --> 46:55.200
And we'd better get to selling them now.

46:55.200 --> 47:01.200
You know, folks, better tasting Chesterfield is the only cigarette that combines for you mildness with no unpleasant aftertaste.

47:01.200 --> 47:04.200
How do you know they're mild? Well, you just make our mildness test.

47:04.200 --> 47:06.200
You buy them, open them up, and enjoy that mild aroma.

47:06.200 --> 47:10.200
Then smoke a Chesterfield. You'll know it's milder because it smokes milder.

47:10.200 --> 47:12.200
And Chesterfield leaves no unpleasant aftertaste.

47:12.200 --> 47:16.200
That fact has been confirmed by the country's first and only cigarette taste panel.

47:16.200 --> 47:18.200
So, always buy Chesterfield.

47:18.200 --> 47:21.200
Go on, me junior, let's sum it up musically.

47:21.200 --> 47:25.200
Chesterfield, Chesterfield always takes first place.

47:25.200 --> 47:28.200
That milder, mild tobacco never leaves an aftertaste.

47:28.200 --> 47:33.200
So, open a pack, give them a smell, then you'll smoke them.

47:33.200 --> 47:40.200
Music

47:40.200 --> 47:49.200
Returning to a scene of his triumph on the big show is one of the truly great voices of our time, Mr. Lawrence Melchior,

47:49.200 --> 47:54.200
who only five years ago, tonight, made his debut in opera in this country.

47:54.200 --> 48:00.200
Mr. Melchior will now sing a study to Tristan, dreamed by Wagner.

48:00.200 --> 48:03.200
Merge it, darling, if you please.

48:03.200 --> 48:19.200
Music

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Music

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Music

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Music

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Music

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Music

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Music

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Music

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Music

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Music

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Music

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Music

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Music

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Music

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Music

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Music

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Music

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Music

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Music

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Music

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Music

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Bravo, Lawrence Melchior, bravo.

52:26.200 --> 52:28.200
Your undivined voice is useful.

52:28.200 --> 52:31.200
We are honored to have you back on the big show.

52:31.200 --> 52:35.200
Lola, it's always a pleasure to be on this show with you.

52:35.200 --> 52:41.200
Since you were your last, Lawrence, darling, I've been doing quite a bit of singing myself.

52:41.200 --> 52:44.200
Oh, I know, we have heard.

52:44.200 --> 52:48.200
Your voice has created sensation in music circles everywhere.

52:48.200 --> 52:52.200
Oh, you're joking. Are you joking, darling?

52:52.200 --> 52:57.200
How can I be joking? I have no sense of humor.

52:57.200 --> 53:02.200
Don't you really mean that music circles think I'm a sensation?

53:02.200 --> 53:09.200
Too, Lola. You know, today I'm celebrating the 25th anniversary of my operatic debut in this country.

53:09.200 --> 53:19.200
And I give you my word that you have created several new notes never known to the human ear.

53:19.200 --> 53:27.200
You know, really, darling, this is exciting news. I just can't wait to tell somebody. Oh, that's Jack Carson. Jack, darling.

53:27.200 --> 53:28.200
Yes, hello?

53:28.200 --> 53:35.200
Jack, do you know what Lawrence Melchior just told me? He said that I have... Oh, I beg your pardon, sir. Do you know Lawrence Melchior?

53:35.200 --> 53:36.200
Hello, Mr. Melchior.

53:36.200 --> 53:37.200
How do you do?

53:37.200 --> 53:39.200
Jack, Lawrence just told me...

53:39.200 --> 53:41.200
Mr. Melchior, you've got much thinner, haven't you?

53:41.200 --> 53:43.200
Oh, yes, my doctor has put me on a strict diet.

53:43.200 --> 53:46.200
Jack, Lawrence, darling, just told me that my voice...

53:46.200 --> 53:47.200
I'm on a diet myself.

53:47.200 --> 53:48.200
What kind of a diet?

53:48.200 --> 53:49.200
Jack, about my voice...

53:49.200 --> 53:52.200
It's a very simple diet. For breakfast, I have lunch and dinner.

53:52.200 --> 53:54.200
Mm-hmm.

53:54.200 --> 53:59.200
For lunch, I have a midnight snack and tomorrow's breakfast. And for dinner, I have tomorrow's lunch and dinner.

53:59.200 --> 54:02.200
In case of a nine-day diet, I'm doing it three days.

54:02.200 --> 54:05.200
A new idea you can reduce without losing weight.

54:05.200 --> 54:07.200
Why don't you try it, Mr. Melchior?

54:07.200 --> 54:12.200
Oh, I am happy with my doctor. He examined me and gave me his certificate.

54:12.200 --> 54:14.200
Jack, did you know that I have created notes...

54:14.200 --> 54:16.200
Let me see the certificate.

54:16.200 --> 54:18.200
I'll read it to you, you see.

54:18.200 --> 54:24.200
This is to certify that I have examined Mr. Melchior and have found him to be critically fit.

54:24.200 --> 54:25.200
Mm-hmm.

54:25.200 --> 54:28.200
Look how his spouse fed. F-A-T.

54:31.200 --> 54:35.200
Well, if you two slap-sippin' gentlemen will let me get a word in here.

54:35.200 --> 54:36.200
Yes, Lola?

54:36.200 --> 54:40.200
I have been trying to tell you, Jack, that Lawrence just gave me a great compliment.

54:40.200 --> 54:45.200
He said that I am a sensation in music circles. I have created several new notes.

54:45.200 --> 54:46.200
New notes?

54:46.200 --> 54:48.200
That's right. Isn't that right, Lawrence, darling?

54:48.200 --> 54:57.200
That's right. You see, the only known letters in the musical scale are A, B, C, D, E, F, and G.

54:57.200 --> 54:59.200
Oh, yes, I've heard that rumor.

54:59.200 --> 55:05.200
Well, we have located your notes slightly above G.

55:05.200 --> 55:10.200
Do you hear that, Jack? My notes are above G. That would be H, wouldn't it?

55:10.200 --> 55:12.200
It sounds like H to me.

55:12.200 --> 55:19.200
Lawrence, darling, do you think music is ready for these new notes?

55:19.200 --> 55:27.200
Oh, they are getting ready. Pianos are being re-tuned and clarinets are being re-pitched and violins are being re-strung.

55:27.200 --> 55:30.200
Razors are being re-sharpened.

55:30.200 --> 55:38.200
Lawrence, you've given me renewed confidence. And so I'm going to sing a chorus of a song for you right now.

55:38.200 --> 55:39.200
Right now?

55:39.200 --> 55:40.200
Right now.

55:40.200 --> 55:45.200
Mr. Melky, another thing about that diet I was telling you about. The doctor said you should take long walks.

55:45.200 --> 55:46.200
How long?

55:46.200 --> 55:49.200
About 32 bars. Would you join me?

55:49.200 --> 55:50.200
Of course.

55:50.200 --> 55:51.200
Shall we go?

55:51.200 --> 55:54.200
Come back here, you cowards!

55:54.200 --> 56:05.200
Music

56:05.200 --> 56:11.200
When we ask you to try Anisyn for the relief of pain due to a headache, neuritis, and neuralgia,

56:11.200 --> 56:14.200
we're not asking you to try a new or unproved method.

56:14.200 --> 56:20.200
For there are many people listening in now who have been introduced to Anisyn tablets by their own dentist or physician.

56:20.200 --> 56:27.200
Now you who have received Anisyn this way know the effective, incredibly fast relief these tablets bring.

56:27.200 --> 56:34.200
Anisyn is like a doctor's prescription. That is, Anisyn contains not just one, but a combination of medically proven,

56:34.200 --> 56:37.200
active ingredients in easy-to-take tablet form.

56:37.200 --> 56:41.200
People by the thousands are using modern Anisyn today instead of other ways.

56:41.200 --> 56:44.200
Doesn't their experience seem worth following?

56:44.200 --> 56:49.200
Try Anisyn the next time you suffer pains from headaches, neuritis, or neuralgia.

56:49.200 --> 56:51.200
You'll be delighted with the results.

56:51.200 --> 56:57.200
Ask your drugist for Anisyn today. Anisyn is spelled A-N-A-C-I-N.

56:57.200 --> 57:06.200
Music

57:06.200 --> 57:14.200
Well, darlings, in just a moment Mr. Ed Winn will join Mr. Melchior and do one of his wonderfully funny opera interpretations.

57:14.200 --> 57:18.200
But first a word from Ed Hurley High. Who ho he ho ho.

57:18.200 --> 57:23.200
Miss Bankhead, Ed Hurley he is on a short vacation. I've been doing the announcing. My name's Ben Growar.

57:23.200 --> 57:29.200
Oh, isn't that wonderful, darling. They finally gave me an announcer whose name I can pronounce.

57:29.200 --> 57:33.200
I'm glad you're here. Go right ahead, Ben Growar.

57:33.200 --> 57:37.200
This portion of the program has been brought to you by RCA Victor.

57:37.200 --> 57:41.200
World leader in radio, first in recorded music, first in television.

57:41.200 --> 57:46.200
By Chesterfield, the cigarette that has, for you, mildness with no unpleasant aftertaste.

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And by the makers of Anisyn for fast relief from pain of headaches, ureitis, and neuralgia.

57:55.200 --> 57:58.200
This is the big show and Tallulah is about to introduce...

57:58.200 --> 58:04.200
Ladies and gentlemen, one of the great, great clowns of the theatre, Mr. Ed Winn.

58:04.200 --> 58:13.200
Applause

58:13.200 --> 58:16.200
Ed, darling, it's so nice of you to come on the show this week.

58:16.200 --> 58:22.200
Oh, well, I had to come, Tallulah. I saw where you got that fella, you know, that finger. What's his name?

58:22.200 --> 58:24.200
Alois Melchior.

58:24.200 --> 58:28.200
Well, that's close enough, yes. He's going to sing an opera, you know.

58:28.200 --> 58:32.200
And in this country, people don't understand those foreign language operas.

58:32.200 --> 58:35.200
I'm going to explain that this is the latest story of Carmen I'm going to tell.

58:35.200 --> 58:39.200
But, darling, you explained Carmen the last two times you were on the show.

58:39.200 --> 58:44.200
Well, that doesn't mean anything. There are a lot of stories of Carmen. They all have different names, you know.

58:44.200 --> 58:45.200
Different names?

58:45.200 --> 58:50.200
Sadly, I saw Carmen last week at the Metropolitan. It was called the Marriage of Figaro, it was called.

58:50.200 --> 58:53.200
Well, now how do you come to change names?

58:53.200 --> 58:58.200
Well, Carmen's a girl, you know. When she gets married, she changes her name, that's all.

58:58.200 --> 59:01.200
But really, tonight's story of Carmen is nothing like it.

59:01.200 --> 59:06.200
I'm sure of that. But, Ed, here's Mr. Melchior. Lawrence, you remember Mr. Winn.

59:06.200 --> 59:12.200
Vividly. No matter what I sing, he only tells the story of Carmen.

59:12.200 --> 59:18.200
But you don't seem to realize Mr. Melchior, Lawrence Melchior.

59:18.200 --> 59:24.200
Well, that's close enough, yes. You see, I'm an expert on Carmen.

59:24.200 --> 59:27.200
Mr. Winn.

59:27.200 --> 59:28.200
Yes.

59:28.200 --> 59:32.200
I don't think you know if you are Carmen or Gunn.

59:32.200 --> 59:40.200
You have to excuse me. I crack the puns, you know. Don't you crack them.

59:40.200 --> 59:45.200
You don't seem to realize that there are 12 different versions of the bullfight alone in Carmen.

59:45.200 --> 59:47.200
That's a lot of bull.

59:47.200 --> 59:49.200
Young man, uh...

59:49.200 --> 59:51.200
Young man?

59:51.200 --> 59:54.200
There is only one authority on Carmen.

59:54.200 --> 59:55.200
Yeah?

59:55.200 --> 59:57.200
And that's the man who wrote the opera.

59:57.200 --> 59:58.200
Yeah?

59:58.200 --> 59:59.200
George B.C.

59:59.200 --> 01:00:02.200
That's ridiculous. I know everything there is to know about Carmen.

01:00:02.200 --> 01:00:03.200
You are B.C.?

01:00:03.200 --> 01:00:06.200
Yeah, but not too busy to explain the opera.

01:00:06.200 --> 01:00:09.200
I'll explain the story of Carmen.

01:00:09.200 --> 01:00:15.200
But Ed, tonight I happen to be singing the hymn to Venus from Tannhäuser.

01:00:15.200 --> 01:00:17.200
Tannhäuser?

01:00:17.200 --> 01:00:21.200
Shows you how things are going up. It used to be Fivehäuser. Did you know that?

01:00:21.200 --> 01:00:23.200
Everything's going up nowadays. It's terrible.

01:00:23.200 --> 01:00:25.200
But you're going to sing Carmen?

01:00:25.200 --> 01:00:28.200
No, I'm going to sing Tannhäuser.

01:00:28.200 --> 01:00:30.200
Uh...

01:00:30.200 --> 01:00:34.200
Next line is yours if you want to say it. I don't care.

01:00:34.200 --> 01:00:36.200
Oh, why?

01:00:36.200 --> 01:00:38.200
Yes, I...

01:00:38.200 --> 01:00:45.200
Oh, why didn't I become a ballet dancer like my good mother wants me to?

01:00:45.200 --> 01:00:51.200
Ladies and gentlemen, Mr. Melchior singing the hymn to Venus from Tannhäuser in German.

01:00:51.200 --> 01:00:58.200
Mr. Wen explaining it in Carmen.

01:00:58.200 --> 01:00:55.460
The

01:01:09.460 --> 01:01:14.200
Excuse me, I'll explain it up till now.

01:01:14.200 --> 01:01:17.200
Can't give the people too much to remember, you see.

01:01:17.200 --> 01:01:24.200
Now this is the story of Carmen. As most of you know, Carmen was born in Spain on account of the beautiful scenery which is there.

01:01:24.200 --> 01:01:31.200
Now Carmen, what a face Carmen has. She has star dust in her eyes, star dust in her cheeks, star dust in her lips.

01:01:31.200 --> 01:01:36.200
You never saw such a, I don't know, such a dust pan.

01:01:36.200 --> 01:01:43.200
Well anyhow, what I wanted to say was that Carmen is so magnificent, when she passes by you can hear a loud whistle.

01:01:43.200 --> 01:01:47.200
But the men never whistle back.

01:01:47.200 --> 01:01:51.200
The hero of the opera is Don Jose. Most of you know that.

01:01:51.200 --> 01:01:57.200
Don Jose makes a fourth landing on his way to Sea Carmen in Madrid, but he is in the jungle in his aeroplane.

01:01:57.200 --> 01:02:02.200
He meets a native girl and trying to make her understand, he says to her, he says,

01:02:02.200 --> 01:02:13.200
Me, me be thirty, me be thirty-nine in landing. And she says, me be twenty-six in October.

01:02:13.200 --> 01:02:17.200
Well this infuriates Don Jose and he rushes to meet Carmen.

01:02:17.200 --> 01:02:26.200
When he sees Carmen, he says, Carmen, every time when I get up in the morning and put my hands down around my knees and pull them up again, I get terrible pains in my back.

01:02:26.200 --> 01:02:28.200
Carmen says, well why do you do it?

01:02:28.200 --> 01:02:33.200
And Jose says, well if you know any other way for a guy to get his pants on, I wish you'd tell me.

01:02:33.200 --> 01:02:36.200
Now you continue the opera, will you?

01:02:36.200 --> 01:02:41.200
He tied them up, me pick a pick a pick a shoe.

01:02:41.200 --> 01:02:44.200
That's enough of it, wait, I'll explain that.

01:02:44.200 --> 01:02:51.200
Now you see, in New York, Carmen and Don Jose, they take a trip to New York and they jump on a sightseeing bus.

01:02:51.200 --> 01:02:58.200
Carmen says to the driver, he says, no she says, Carmen is a woman in this place.

01:02:58.200 --> 01:03:01.200
She says, does this bus stop at the Waldorf Astoria?

01:03:01.200 --> 01:03:05.200
The driver says, no, we keep it in the garage.

01:03:05.200 --> 01:03:07.200
I told her some other ways than that.

01:03:07.200 --> 01:03:09.200
Anyhow, what's next?

01:03:09.200 --> 01:03:10.200
What's next?

01:03:10.200 --> 01:03:14.200
Further on, the driver yells, we are now passing the biggest saloon in town.

01:03:14.200 --> 01:03:21.200
Don Jose jumps off the bus and says, maybe you are, but I'm not.

01:03:21.200 --> 01:03:29.200
That night at Carmen's birthday party, her mother turns to Carmen and she says, Carmen your birthday reminds me of the night you were born.

01:03:29.200 --> 01:03:32.200
Did you know Carmen dear, you were born in the middle of the night?

01:03:32.200 --> 01:03:37.200
Carmen says, gee mom, I hope I didn't wake you up.

01:03:37.200 --> 01:03:39.200
Some of these will make humor illegal.

01:03:39.200 --> 01:03:47.200
Anyhow, now while Carmen and her mother is speaking, Don Jose is speaking to Carmen's father.

01:03:47.200 --> 01:03:49.200
He says, I would like to marry your daughter.

01:03:49.200 --> 01:03:51.200
The father says, can you support a family?

01:03:51.200 --> 01:03:53.200
Jose says, yes.

01:03:53.200 --> 01:03:56.200
The father says, now think hard because there's seven of us.

01:03:56.200 --> 01:04:00.200
Anyhow, Carmen and Don Jose get married.

01:04:00.200 --> 01:04:04.200
It's just as well because, I don't know, they couldn't get along together anyway.

01:04:04.200 --> 01:04:07.200
Now would you continue?

01:04:07.200 --> 01:04:12.200
Wonderful things, I know, are golden faces.

01:04:12.200 --> 01:04:17.200
There is my life in a thousand beautiful rooms.

01:04:17.200 --> 01:04:19.200
Pardon me, I'll explain that.

01:04:19.200 --> 01:04:21.200
You don't mind, do you sir?

01:04:21.200 --> 01:04:23.200
This is very interesting.

01:04:23.200 --> 01:04:28.200
I've got to explain the story for opera lovers who don't care for music at all.

01:04:28.200 --> 01:04:36.200
Anyhow, Carmen and Don Jose are now married and very soon they are blessed with a six year old son.

01:04:36.200 --> 01:04:41.200
The son has what you call group Pearson and Senator McCarthy me.

01:04:41.200 --> 01:04:44.200
They're always knocking each other, you know what I mean?

01:04:44.200 --> 01:04:50.200
The boy says to his father, he says, Papa, when I grow up will I marry a woman like Mother?

01:04:50.200 --> 01:04:54.200
And his father says, you sure will if you're not careful.

01:04:54.200 --> 01:04:58.200
Don Jose says, well the latest thing your mother did was to make her hair blonde.

01:04:58.200 --> 01:05:00.200
This anger's Carmen.

01:05:00.200 --> 01:05:03.200
And she says, I see you've made your nose red.

01:05:03.200 --> 01:05:11.200
Don Jose says, yes I have, but I don't have to go to the beauty parlor once a week to have the end touched up.

01:05:11.200 --> 01:05:14.200
Well I didn't like it either, I don't know.

01:05:14.200 --> 01:05:18.200
Carmen then says, let us kiss and make up, why fight?

01:05:18.200 --> 01:05:21.200
And as they kiss there is a loud explosion.

01:05:21.200 --> 01:05:26.200
It seems that he had a toothpick in his mouth and she was chewing bubble gum.

01:05:26.200 --> 01:05:28.200
The explosion knocked Don out the window.

01:05:28.200 --> 01:05:33.200
The son says, look Mama, Papa fell out the 18 story window and killed himself.

01:05:33.200 --> 01:05:39.200
Carmen says, I can't understand it because just two weeks ago he was vaccinated against everything.

01:05:39.200 --> 01:05:41.200
Will you go on stage please?

01:05:41.200 --> 01:06:07.200
And then of course Carmen goes.

01:06:07.200 --> 01:06:27.200
One day it made me Carmen.

01:06:27.200 --> 01:06:30.200
Carmen goes.

01:06:30.200 --> 01:06:56.200
This guy says he likes to sing.

01:06:56.200 --> 01:07:25.200
Now what?

01:07:25.200 --> 01:07:31.200
What he just sang of course was the last act, which naturally needs description because a lot of people didn't understand it.

01:07:31.200 --> 01:07:34.200
But it's in this act where you meet Escamillo.

01:07:34.200 --> 01:07:36.200
I'd like to describe him.

01:07:36.200 --> 01:07:41.200
Escamillo is the kind of a guy you would use for a blueprint if you were building an idiot.

01:07:41.200 --> 01:07:49.200
Now when he was 12 years old, when he was 12 years old in one day he lost his father and mother.

01:07:49.200 --> 01:07:51.200
What a crap game.

01:07:51.200 --> 01:07:57.200
Well anyhow, when he grows up you know Escamillo becomes a great saging.

01:07:57.200 --> 01:08:00.200
You see how I've connected the story there?

01:08:00.200 --> 01:08:04.200
He becomes a saging. One night he sees Carmen for the first time.

01:08:04.200 --> 01:08:05.200
She is dancing.

01:08:05.200 --> 01:08:10.200
Escamillo the famous saging goes up and he taps the man on the shoulder.

01:08:10.200 --> 01:08:15.200
He says, may I cut in?

01:08:15.200 --> 01:08:19.200
Carmen being a lady coily drops her eyelids.

01:08:19.200 --> 01:08:24.200
Escamillo being a gentleman dupes down and picks them up.

01:08:24.200 --> 01:08:29.200
She said, I'm tired of dancing. I'll take off my shoes.

01:08:29.200 --> 01:08:34.200
He looks, he says, those are the ten dainiest toes I have ever seen.

01:08:34.200 --> 01:08:38.200
Carmen says, I'll take off my other shoe.

01:08:38.200 --> 01:08:45.200
At this instant, Carmen's father rushes to the bar and says, give me 22 drinks.

01:08:45.200 --> 01:08:49.200
The bartender at the ball says, why do you want 22 drinks?

01:08:49.200 --> 01:08:56.200
Carmen says, on account of that sign over the bar, it says nobody's saved under 21.

01:08:56.200 --> 01:09:01.200
It's nothing like a good joke and that is certainly not like a good joke.

01:09:01.200 --> 01:09:06.200
But anyhow, they realize there's something wrong with Escamillo.

01:09:06.200 --> 01:09:11.200
You see that is with a father. So Escamillo rushes Carmen's father to his hospital.

01:09:11.200 --> 01:09:15.200
It's a brand new hospital. In fact, this is the opening day.

01:09:15.200 --> 01:09:20.200
And they celebrate the opening of the hospital and Carmen's father at the same time.

01:09:20.200 --> 01:09:24.200
What an operation. This is a remarkable operation.

01:09:24.200 --> 01:09:30.200
From Carmen's father, they remove a piece of bar rail from the sole of his foot.

01:09:30.200 --> 01:09:34.200
Very unusual thing. After the operation, Carmen asks Escamillo to her home.

01:09:34.200 --> 01:09:37.200
He goes there, but he is astonished at the sight.

01:09:37.200 --> 01:09:42.200
He says, this is ridiculous. He says, you have pigs in your living room.

01:09:42.200 --> 01:09:48.200
Carmen says, why not? There's everything in my living room a pig would want.

01:09:48.200 --> 01:09:52.200
Wonderful operation. Suddenly Carmen says, will you marry me?

01:09:52.200 --> 01:09:55.200
He says, you're asking me. I don't know what to say.

01:09:55.200 --> 01:09:59.200
Carmen says, just say yes and from there on in, keep your big trap shut.

01:09:59.200 --> 01:10:03.200
And as the payment's coming down, Escamillo says, this is too much.

01:10:03.200 --> 01:10:06.200
I'm going to Hollywood and be a movie actor.

01:10:06.200 --> 01:10:10.200
Carmen yells, Hollywood bar. One day you're kissing Lana Trader.

01:10:10.200 --> 01:10:12.200
The next day you're kissing Greer Garson.

01:10:12.200 --> 01:10:17.200
The next day you're kissing Betty Grable and the next day you're a has-been.

01:10:17.200 --> 01:10:21.200
And Escamillo says, yes, but just think where I has been.

01:10:21.200 --> 01:10:36.200
Ed, that was divinely hilarious. Thanks for another story of Carmen.

01:10:36.200 --> 01:10:43.200
And to you, Lord Melchior, our thanks for lending your magnificent voice to Mr. Wynne's inspired nonsense.

01:10:43.200 --> 01:10:47.200
And now here's an orchestra number for Meredith Wilson and his big show,

01:10:47.200 --> 01:10:52.200
the orchestra chorus, the number, Hollabaloo, which is all about band music,

01:10:52.200 --> 01:10:55.200
which makes me very happy because I love band music.

01:10:55.200 --> 01:10:58.200
So don't be surprised, darlings, if I join in somewhere.

01:10:58.200 --> 01:11:00.200
Meredith, if you please.

01:11:00.200 --> 01:11:18.200
Hollabaloo, Hollabaloo, Hollabaloo, how I love the music of the band.

01:11:18.200 --> 01:11:22.200
Hollabaloo, Hollabaloo, Hollabaloo, cause the music I can play is grand.

01:11:22.200 --> 01:11:29.200
Hollabaloo, Hollabaloo, Hollabaloo, it's the only music I can understand.

01:11:29.200 --> 01:11:33.200
I want to dance, I want to sing, it's like ding-a-ling-a-ling.

01:11:33.200 --> 01:11:41.200
Hollabaloo, Hollabaloo, Hollabaloo, Hollabaloo.

01:11:41.200 --> 01:11:46.200
Give me the music, give me the music, give me the music of the mix,

01:11:46.200 --> 01:11:48.200
come on, they are.

01:11:48.200 --> 01:11:56.200
Let me be happy, let me be happy, let me be happy, that's the kind of fool I am.

01:11:56.200 --> 01:12:04.200
Play me a polka, play me a polka, play me a polka till they carry me away.

01:12:04.200 --> 01:12:07.200
Put in an off-the-dive, we'll have a Hollabaloo of advice,

01:12:07.200 --> 01:12:15.200
put it up until we see the break of day.

01:12:15.200 --> 01:12:23.200
Now I love the rhythm of the band.

01:12:23.200 --> 01:12:30.200
Won't you make the music that they play is simply grand?

01:12:30.200 --> 01:12:35.200
It's the only rhythm I can really understand.

01:12:35.200 --> 01:12:42.200
Dance, sing, sing-a-ling, Hollabaloo, Hollabaloo, Hollabaloo, Hollabaloo.

01:12:42.200 --> 01:12:50.200
Give me a cover, hey, give Hollabaloo a cover.

01:12:50.200 --> 01:12:58.200
Give me a cymbal, hey, give Hollabaloo a cymbal.

01:12:58.200 --> 01:13:06.200
Give me a tuba, hey, give Hollabaloo a tuba.

01:13:06.200 --> 01:13:09.200
I am ready to get high, play the early instrument,

01:13:09.200 --> 01:13:13.200
so professor won't you get the boy to play?

01:13:13.200 --> 01:13:17.200
Hollabaloo, Hollabaloo, Hollabaloo.

01:13:17.200 --> 01:13:21.200
It's the only rhythm I can understand.

01:13:21.200 --> 01:13:25.200
I want to dance, I want to sing,

01:13:25.200 --> 01:13:29.200
I want to sing-a-ling-a-ling until I hear the magic ring.

01:13:29.200 --> 01:13:37.200
Hollabaloo, Hollabaloo, Hollabaloo, Hollabaloo.

01:13:37.200 --> 01:13:44.200
Applause

01:13:44.200 --> 01:13:48.200
Thank you, Mary Grosson, darling, and before we get involved in an

01:13:48.200 --> 01:13:53.200
in-na-tiating story about your hometown, let's go on to...

01:13:53.200 --> 01:13:55.200
Wait a minute, Tallulah, I'd like to meet that nice gentleman.

01:13:55.200 --> 01:13:59.200
Oh, good, it's Lily, darling, no, Mary is a wonderful musician,

01:13:59.200 --> 01:14:03.200
I simply adore him and all that, but he can be such a bore.

01:14:03.200 --> 01:14:09.200
Oh, I adore bores. You know, we fought a war over them.

01:14:09.200 --> 01:14:11.200
Please, excuse me.

01:14:11.200 --> 01:14:15.200
Oh, very well if you must, Meredith, darling.

01:14:15.200 --> 01:14:16.200
Yes, Miss Bankhead.

01:14:16.200 --> 01:14:17.200
This...

01:14:17.200 --> 01:14:22.200
Applause

01:14:22.200 --> 01:14:23.200
This is Beatrice Lily.

01:14:23.200 --> 01:14:24.200
Meredith Wusson.

01:14:24.200 --> 01:14:29.200
Hello, Meredith. Tallulah tells me you're quite a bore.

01:14:29.200 --> 01:14:32.200
Well, thank you. I do my best.

01:14:32.200 --> 01:14:38.200
I adore bores. God, say something boring.

01:14:38.200 --> 01:14:42.200
Well, I guess I didn't exactly expect to be called on at this time.

01:14:42.200 --> 01:14:46.200
Never was very good at doing any impromptu boring.

01:14:46.200 --> 01:14:50.200
I like that band number you just played. When did you start leading a band?

01:14:50.200 --> 01:14:53.200
That could have a pretty boring answer.

01:14:53.200 --> 01:14:59.200
Well, sir, Miss Bankhead, and you too, Miss Lily,

01:14:59.200 --> 01:15:02.200
the first orchestra I ever had was really a doozy.

01:15:02.200 --> 01:15:05.200
It was the high school orchestra back in Mason City, Iowa.

01:15:05.200 --> 01:15:07.200
That's my hometown, you know.

01:15:07.200 --> 01:15:08.200
Yes, I know.

01:15:08.200 --> 01:15:11.200
We had a girl bandsman who played the euphonium.

01:15:11.200 --> 01:15:14.200
You know what that is. That's a big brass horn.

01:15:14.200 --> 01:15:19.200
It only belongs in a band, not in an orchestra like we had back in Mason City.

01:15:19.200 --> 01:15:21.200
Well, I'll never forget that one particular night.

01:15:21.200 --> 01:15:25.200
This girl played the euphonium and she was always just one beat early.

01:15:25.200 --> 01:15:28.200
Would you care to hear how it sounded, Miss Lily?

01:15:28.200 --> 01:15:32.200
Oh, I'd love to. Sounds so boring.

01:15:32.200 --> 01:15:33.200
Would you mind hearing it for me?

01:15:33.200 --> 01:15:37.200
I don't even know what he's talking about.

01:15:37.200 --> 01:15:38.200
He's talking something about a euphonium.

01:15:38.200 --> 01:15:39.200
What's that?

01:15:39.200 --> 01:15:44.200
I think it's a small town in Iowa.

01:15:44.200 --> 01:15:47.200
No, you see, euphonium is a big brass horn.

01:15:47.200 --> 01:15:53.200
It was in my high school, my hometown, Mason City, in the high school orchestra.

01:15:53.200 --> 01:15:56.200
I can hear that orchestra yet.

01:15:56.200 --> 01:16:02.760
OSSE

01:16:26.200 --> 01:16:30.620
21

01:16:31.120 --> 01:16:35.080
Russian German

01:16:35.100 --> 01:16:32.900
German Asian

01:16:46.760 --> 01:16:51.900
Believe in God

01:16:51.900 --> 01:16:55.900
Hey, saluda, Fred, Fred and I want to talk to you

01:16:55.900 --> 01:16:57.240
What is it, gentlemen?

01:16:57.240 --> 01:16:58.540
Do you want to tell her, Jack?

01:16:58.540 --> 01:17:00.080
Sure, I'll tell her, Fred, I'm not afraid of her

01:17:00.080 --> 01:17:00.880
Good, good

01:17:00.880 --> 01:17:04.420
Saluda, we were listening to Edwin explain that opera before

01:17:04.420 --> 01:17:06.940
And we got to thinking that too many people

01:17:06.940 --> 01:17:09.460
don't understand opera in the first place

01:17:09.460 --> 01:17:12.320
And why doesn't somebody on this program, you know,

01:17:12.320 --> 01:17:13.760
explain a popular song?

01:17:13.760 --> 01:17:16.160
But I don't understand, darlings, any popular song

01:17:16.160 --> 01:17:19.400
The lyric is self-explanatory

01:17:19.400 --> 01:17:21.200
Not the way you sing it

01:17:21.200 --> 01:17:26.040
And darling, are you implying that I don't sing a popular song?

01:17:26.040 --> 01:17:28.740
Well, when you start out singing it, it's popular

01:17:30.740 --> 01:17:33.340
You see, Tallulah, what Jack means is

01:17:33.340 --> 01:17:36.680
that there's always a story behind every popular song

01:17:36.680 --> 01:17:39.520
Now what was that song that used to be so popular

01:17:39.520 --> 01:17:41.080
before you recorded it?

01:17:42.220 --> 01:17:43.280
I'll be seeing you

01:17:43.280 --> 01:17:44.580
That's the one, that's the one

01:17:44.580 --> 01:17:47.360
Would you care to, for want of a better word,

01:17:47.360 --> 01:17:48.220
sing it for us?

01:17:48.220 --> 01:17:51.020
Fred and I will explain the story behind it

01:17:51.020 --> 01:17:51.920
Yes

01:17:51.920 --> 01:17:54.900
I'd love to, darlings, I'd just love to sing

01:17:54.900 --> 01:17:56.500
Well, how do you get the right key?

01:17:56.500 --> 01:17:59.000
Do you use the Holland Tunnel for a pitch pipe?

01:17:59.000 --> 01:18:04.000
She does need a bet, she's a walking euphonium

01:18:06.600 --> 01:18:07.440
Oh really?

01:18:07.440 --> 01:18:08.680
Oh, that's awesome

01:18:08.680 --> 01:18:13.680
Meridith, Meridith will give me my key, won't you, darling?

01:18:14.480 --> 01:18:15.920
Sure, all of them

01:18:15.920 --> 01:18:18.720
Oh, thank you, darling

01:18:18.720 --> 01:18:20.420
And now, ladies and gentlemen,

01:18:20.420 --> 01:18:23.500
the glamorous and unpredictable ballerina voice

01:18:23.500 --> 01:18:26.260
of Miss Tallulah Brockman Bankhead

01:18:26.260 --> 01:18:28.440
singing I'll Be Seeing You

01:18:30.440 --> 01:18:35.440
I'll be seeing you

01:18:36.480 --> 01:18:40.940
in all the old familiar places

01:18:40.940 --> 01:18:45.720
that this heart of mine embraces

01:18:45.720 --> 01:18:47.920
all day through

01:18:47.920 --> 01:18:49.320
What's up, Brockman?

01:18:49.320 --> 01:18:52.820
I'll explain that part of it, please

01:18:52.820 --> 01:18:55.960
I've got to carry away

01:18:55.960 --> 01:18:58.500
Fred and I will explain it up to here

01:18:58.500 --> 01:18:59.340
Hello, Jack

01:18:59.340 --> 01:19:01.700
Hi, Fred, have you seen Tallulah around lately?

01:19:01.700 --> 01:19:02.800
Tallulah who?

01:19:02.800 --> 01:19:06.840
I don't know, Tallulah Bankhead

01:19:06.840 --> 01:19:08.140
Oh, him?

01:19:08.140 --> 01:19:08.980
Yes

01:19:08.980 --> 01:19:12.880
No, I haven't, Jack

01:19:12.880 --> 01:19:17.040
and I have looked in all of the old familiar places

01:19:17.040 --> 01:19:20.020
Did you see any old familiar faces?

01:19:20.020 --> 01:19:21.960
Not Tallulah

01:19:21.960 --> 01:19:23.960
Did you look in the Luxor baths?

01:19:23.960 --> 01:19:24.960
Yes

01:19:24.960 --> 01:19:25.960
Yes

01:19:25.960 --> 01:19:26.960
Yes

01:19:26.960 --> 01:19:27.960
Yes

01:19:27.960 --> 01:19:28.960
Yes

01:19:28.960 --> 01:19:29.960
Yes

01:19:29.960 --> 01:19:30.960
Yes

01:19:30.960 --> 01:19:31.960
Yes

01:19:31.960 --> 01:19:32.960
Yes

01:19:32.960 --> 01:19:33.960
Yes

01:19:33.960 --> 01:19:34.960
Yes

01:19:34.960 --> 01:19:35.960
But I didn't see any familiar faces there either

01:19:35.960 --> 01:19:36.960
Yes

01:19:36.960 --> 01:19:37.960
Yes

01:19:37.960 --> 01:19:38.960
Yes

01:19:38.960 --> 01:19:39.980
Yes

01:19:39.980 --> 01:19:40.980
Yes

01:19:40.980 --> 01:19:41.980
Yes

01:19:41.980 --> 01:19:42.980
Yes

01:19:42.980 --> 01:19:43.980
Yes

01:19:43.980 --> 01:19:44.980
Yes

01:19:44.980 --> 01:19:45.980
Yes

01:19:45.980 --> 01:19:46.980
Yes

01:19:46.980 --> 01:19:47.980
Yes

01:19:47.980 --> 01:19:48.980
Yes

01:19:48.980 --> 01:19:49.980
Yes

01:19:49.980 --> 01:19:50.980
Yes

01:19:50.980 --> 01:19:51.980
Yes

01:19:51.980 --> 01:19:52.980
Yes

01:19:52.980 --> 01:19:53.980
Yes

01:19:53.980 --> 01:19:56.980
Fred, I'm worried about Tallulah

01:19:56.980 --> 01:19:58.980
I wonder if she's broke

01:19:58.980 --> 01:20:01.000
Well, I hear she's flat

01:20:01.000 --> 01:20:03.000
Yeah, I just heard it

01:20:03.000 --> 01:20:06.000
I just heard it too

01:20:06.000 --> 01:20:09.000
But I still wonder if she's drunk

01:20:09.000 --> 01:20:12.000
Jack, she must be

01:20:12.000 --> 01:20:15.000
You know, she spends so much money on clothes

01:20:15.000 --> 01:20:17.000
Did you ever notice that mink coat?

01:20:17.000 --> 01:20:19.020
Well, I happen to know that somebody gave her that mink coat

01:20:19.020 --> 01:20:20.020
Oh, really?

01:20:20.020 --> 01:20:23.020
What did she have to do for it?

01:20:23.020 --> 01:20:25.020
Nothing, just lengthen the sleeves

01:20:25.020 --> 01:20:26.020
Oh

01:20:26.020 --> 01:20:27.020
Ah

01:20:27.020 --> 01:20:28.020
Ah

01:20:28.020 --> 01:20:29.020
Ah

01:20:29.020 --> 01:20:30.020
Ah

01:20:30.020 --> 01:20:31.020
Ah

01:20:31.020 --> 01:20:32.020
Ah

01:20:32.020 --> 01:20:33.020
Ah

01:20:33.020 --> 01:20:34.020
Ah

01:20:34.020 --> 01:20:35.020
Ah

01:20:35.020 --> 01:20:36.020
Ah

01:20:36.020 --> 01:20:37.020
Ah

01:20:37.020 --> 01:20:38.020
Ah

01:20:38.020 --> 01:20:41.040
You know, she used to spend all of her money on jewelry

01:20:41.040 --> 01:20:44.040
But they won't let her into Tiffany's anymore

01:20:44.040 --> 01:20:45.040
They won't?

01:20:45.040 --> 01:20:46.040
Why not?

01:20:46.040 --> 01:20:48.040
Well, she has such a terrible acid condition

01:20:48.040 --> 01:20:52.040
The minute she walks in, all of the rings in the place turn green

01:20:52.040 --> 01:20:54.040
Laughter

01:20:54.040 --> 01:20:59.040
I'll be seeing you

01:20:59.040 --> 01:21:03.060
In every lovely summer's day

01:21:03.060 --> 01:21:07.060
In everything that's light and gay

01:21:07.060 --> 01:21:11.060
I'll always think of you that way

01:21:11.060 --> 01:21:14.060
Jack, frankly, I'm worried about Tallulah

01:21:14.060 --> 01:21:17.060
Let's go down to police headquarters and give them a description of her

01:21:17.060 --> 01:21:18.060
A description of Tallulah?

01:21:18.060 --> 01:21:19.060
Yeah

01:21:19.060 --> 01:21:20.080
They'd never believe it

01:21:20.080 --> 01:21:22.080
Laughter

01:21:22.080 --> 01:21:23.080
You know what I think?

01:21:23.080 --> 01:21:26.080
She must have had a big fight with some guy that she's in love with

01:21:26.080 --> 01:21:29.080
Well, I tell you, let's make the rounds of the hospitals

01:21:29.080 --> 01:21:30.080
Maybe she's visiting him

01:21:30.080 --> 01:21:31.080
She'd be with him

01:21:31.080 --> 01:21:32.080
Wait, wait a minute

01:21:32.080 --> 01:21:33.080
Did you hear something?

01:21:33.080 --> 01:21:34.080
I think it's Tallulah

01:21:34.080 --> 01:21:35.080
Listen

01:21:35.080 --> 01:21:40.080
I'll find you in the morning sun

01:21:40.080 --> 01:21:44.100
And where the night is

01:21:44.100 --> 01:21:46.100
No, no, it's only a steamship coming in tonight

01:21:46.100 --> 01:21:48.100
Laughter

01:21:48.100 --> 01:21:53.100
We'll be looking at the moon

01:21:53.100 --> 01:21:58.100
But I will be sleeping

01:21:58.100 --> 01:22:03.100
Alone

01:22:03.100 --> 01:22:19.120
Applause

01:22:19.120 --> 01:22:22.120
Well, darlings, that's it for this week

01:22:22.120 --> 01:22:26.120
We hope you'll all be with us next Sunday when we will have with us

01:22:26.120 --> 01:22:33.140
Uta Hagen, Jack Haley, Paul Kelly, James Melton, Olsen & Johnson, Monty Woolley, and others

01:22:33.140 --> 01:22:38.140
And of course, our very own Meridith Wilson and the Big Show orchestra chorus

01:22:38.140 --> 01:22:44.140
Until then, may the good Lord bless and keep you

01:22:44.140 --> 01:22:48.140
Whether near or far away

01:22:48.140 --> 01:22:50.140
Meridith

01:22:50.140 --> 01:22:58.160
May you find that long-awaited golden day today

01:22:58.160 --> 01:22:59.160
Bee

01:22:59.160 --> 01:23:04.160
May your troubles all be no ones

01:23:04.160 --> 01:23:08.160
And your fortune ten times ten

01:23:08.160 --> 01:23:09.160
Fred

01:23:09.160 --> 01:23:14.160
May the good Lord bless and keep you

01:23:14.160 --> 01:23:19.180
Till we meet again

01:23:19.180 --> 01:23:20.180
Portland

01:23:20.180 --> 01:23:25.180
May you walk with the light shining

01:23:25.180 --> 01:23:31.180
And a bluebird in every tree head

01:23:31.180 --> 01:23:36.200
May there be a silver lining

01:23:36.200 --> 01:23:40.200
Back of every cloud you see

01:23:40.200 --> 01:23:41.200
Jack

01:23:41.200 --> 01:23:47.200
Clear your dreams with sweet tomorrows

01:23:47.200 --> 01:23:51.200
Never mind what might have been

01:23:51.200 --> 01:23:52.200
Dennis

01:23:52.200 --> 01:23:57.220
May the good Lord bless and keep you

01:23:57.220 --> 01:24:03.220
Till we meet again

01:24:03.220 --> 01:24:04.220
Loris

01:24:04.220 --> 01:24:10.220
May you long recall each rainbow

01:24:10.220 --> 01:24:16.240
Then you'll soon forget the rain

01:24:16.240 --> 01:24:21.240
May the warm and gentle memories

01:24:21.240 --> 01:24:28.240
Be the ones that will remain

01:24:28.240 --> 01:24:34.240
Clear your dreams with sweet tomorrows

01:24:34.240 --> 01:24:42.260
Never mind what might have been

01:24:42.260 --> 01:24:47.260
May the good Lord bless and keep you

01:24:47.260 --> 01:24:53.260
Until we meet again

01:24:53.260 --> 01:25:01.260
May the good Lord bless and keep you

01:25:01.260 --> 01:25:05.260
Till we meet

01:25:05.260 --> 01:25:10.260
Till we meet

01:25:10.260 --> 01:25:17.260
Again

01:25:17.260 --> 01:25:21.260
Good night, darling, and Godspeed to our armed forces.

01:25:21.260 --> 01:25:25.260
We'll hear these broadcasts each week all over the world.

01:25:25.260 --> 01:25:39.260
The Big Show is produced and directed by D. Engelbach

01:25:39.260 --> 01:25:45.260
and written by Goodmanet, Fred Allen, Selma Dynan, George Foster, Mort Green, and Frank Wilson.

01:25:45.260 --> 01:25:48.260
This is Ben Growers saying good night.

01:25:48.260 --> 01:26:05.260
Coming up, Phil Harris and Alice Payne.

01:26:05.260 --> 01:26:09.260
Then enjoy Hedda Hopper's show on NBC.