The Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet, starring the entire Nelson family.
Here's Ozzie. Here's Harriet.
Here's David. And here's Rick.
Here they are, America's favorite family, the Nelsons.
Hi. We're going to turn back the clock a few years this evening, eight to be exact,
and show you what happened to the Nelson household during Christmas week in 1956.
We thought we'd warn you just in case we all look a little younger.
We hope you enjoy reminiscing with us.
There certainly are lots of beautiful Christmas cards this year.
Yeah, they're coming in kind of early, aren't they?
Are you kidding? Christmas is less than a week away.
Is that possible? Boy, it really sneaks up on you.
Oh, here's a nice card from Dr. Williams and his family.
Oh, yeah. Boy, the kids are sure getting big.
You'd think they'd write a little something on it, wouldn't you?
Oh, no, not necessarily. It's a nice picture of the family.
Oh, yeah, I like these family photographs best of all,
but I like people to write a little something on them,
particularly when they're such good friends of ours.
Here's what I mean. Listen to this.
May this be your happiest Christmas, and may all that follow be even happier.
Merry Christmas and a happy New Year.
We hope we may always be privileged to include you among our nicest and best friends.
Isn't that nice? Oh, it certainly is. Who's it from?
Jack McLeaners.
Pardon me.
Oh, let's look at these games over here, Harriet.
Harriet?
Attention, please. Calling Mrs. Muller. Calling Mrs. Muller.
Little Irving is at the Lost and Found Department. Please come and get him. Thank you.
How much is this donkey party game, miss?
Miss?
Oh, hello, Mr. Nelson.
Well, hello there, Mrs. Brewster.
Attention, please. Mrs. Muller, please come and get Little Irving.
He's at the Lost and Found Department. Thank you.
I guess this must be the only quiet corner in the store.
Quite a crowd, isn't it? Isn't it, though?
It seems that no matter how early I start my Christmas shopping, I always get caught in the last minute rush.
Well, that's the way it goes.
Attention, please. Calling Irving Muller. That's Irving Muller.
Your mother is waiting for you at the Lost and Found Department.
You know, every time I hear Silent Night, it reminds me of a wonderful Christmas Eve years ago when Harriet and I were first married.
We'd finished trimming the tree and we'd opened a few of our presents and we're just sitting there in front of the fireplace.
And all of a sudden, as if from out of nowhere, we heard voices singing Silent Night.
It was a group of carolers, friends of ours, and they'd stopped in front of our house to sing for us.
You know, one of my favorites.
Deck the halls with boughs of holly, fa la la la la la la la la.
My goodness, isn't that a coincidence? We have the most wonderful arrangement of that.
Oh, how about that?
Why don't you and Mrs. Nelson join us? It wouldn't take much of your time.
Well, I'll speak to her and see how she feels about it.
Oh, she'd love it.
Um, Clara Randolph phoned her and she said she'd be glad to if you were willing.
Now hear this. Now hear this. Will little Ozzie Nelson please report to the Lost and Found Department?
Oh, I beg your pardon. I'm sorry.
Will Mr. Ozzie Nelson please report to the Lost and Found Department? Your wife is looking for you.
Oh, I'm sorry.
Hey, that looks real nice.
Thank you, dear.
Thanks, Pop.
How come you didn't buy a Christmas tree when you were downtown?
Oh, it's a little too soon, Dave.
Your father wants to wait until Christmas Eve.
Well, no, it isn't a question of waiting until Christmas Eve. I just want to take things as they come along.
I'm not going to get involved in a lot of complications this year.
Well, it seems to me you're involved already. You're going to sing Christmas carol.
Well, I got tricked into that and you helped. But that's all I'm going to do.
When are we going to start putting up the lights outside the house, Pop?
Uh, we're not going to do that this year.
Who says so?
I say so. I'm the guy who gets stuck with all the work.
We'll help you.
Yeah, you guys always say that. But I'm the one who has to climb up on the roof and string the lights up.
Well, if you don't want to do anything so elaborate, why don't you just hang a few lights around the front door?
Oh, sure. I start putting them up around the front door and somebody makes a few suggestions.
All of a sudden there's a ladder standing next to me.
And the next thing I know I'm up on the roof stringing the lights around the chimney.
Hi, Dave.
Oh, hi, Doctor. Come on in.
Thanks.
Uh, Pop, it's Dr. Williams.
Hi, Oz.
Hi, Doc.
Hello, Harriet.
No, I can only stay a minute.
What do you think?
I don't have enough to do so they made me chairman of the Christmas Entertainment Committee at the men's club.
Oh, boy. That sounds like a lot of hard work.
Oh, I don't think so. It sounds like a lot of fun.
You going to do the pageant again this year?
Well, we were going to, but Joe Randolph came up with the suggestion that we do Dickens' Christmas Carol.
So they talked me into playing the nephew.
You see, Harriet, that's just what I was talking about.
Here's a man, one of the busiest men in town, a doctor, and they impose on him and spoil his Christmas.
Are you kidding, Oz?
No, I'm not kidding.
Oh, I get it. Who told you?
Told me what?
Oh, you sly dog, Oz.
Okay, you can have the part.
Here, I thought I was going to have to talk you into it and you'd know about it all along.
Now, wait a minute. If you think I'm going to play a part in your Christmas play, you've got another thing coming.
That's perfect, Oz. That's old Scrooge himself.
Christmas, bah!
I knew you'd be wonderful.
Sure you would. We'll count on you, Oz.
Now, wait a minute. In the first place, how am I going to learn that big, long part?
Well, that'll be easy. We're going to do a short version.
I'll send you the script.
Won't you stay for some coffee, Doc?
Oh, no thanks, Harriet. I've got to get home.
I promised Cheryl I'd start putting up the lights around the house.
Oh, we aren't going to put up any lights this year.
You're not?
Oh, well, yes, we are. We're just not going to make such a big deal of it, that's all.
Oh, that's a shame.
Well, we'll count on you playing Scrooge, Oz.
Christmas, bah!
Hi, Oz.
Well, hello there, Joe.
Hey, you're just in time.
How would you like to help me hang these lights up in front of the house?
Oh, thanks, Oz. I've got plenty to do as it is.
I'll tell you why I dropped by.
You know, the Lodge is putting on the annual Christmas Eve party at the orphanage again.
Oh, that's a nice idea.
Oh, it's a great idea.
But Tubby McIntyre always played Santa Claus for us, and he moved out of town about a month ago.
And we just found out that he always used his own Santa Claus outfit.
Oh, say, I have a Santa Claus outfit right up in the attic.
Oh, gee, that's great, Oz.
If you're there at seven, it'll be just about right.
And we'll have the bag of toys waiting for you.
Joe, look, you're welcome to borrow the outfit, but I can't be Santa Claus.
Oh, sure you can, Oz, with that wonderful hearty laugh of yours.
And you can put a pillow in front there.
I don't know, maybe you won't need a pillow.
Oh, I don't know what sweater I'm wearing here.
Well, I'll need a pillow.
Oh, suit yourself, but, Oz, thanks so much.
You've taken a load off my mind.
Well, no, no, no.
Christmas Eve, seven o'clock at the orphanage.
Just a minute, Harriet. Joe!
Ozzie?
Harriet, what do you want?
I thought you were going to put up the Christmas lights on the front of the house.
Well, I will. I'm just getting them untangled here.
Oh, well, here, these are for you.
Doc sent over your part for the Christmas play, and Mrs. Brewster dropped off the music.
She said, would you please learn the bass part?
Thanks.
Deck the halls with boughs of holly, fa la la la la la la la la.
Christmas ba humbug.
What'd you say, dear?
Christmas ba humbug.
Well, that's a fine Christmas spirit.
That's my part in the play.
Christmas ba humbug.
Does that sound convincing?
Yes, I hate you.
Thank you, dear.
You know, I just don't know how you're going to do all the stuff you promised to do.
Why not?
Well, everything happens on Christmas Eve, which is tomorrow night in case you've forgotten.
Well, I know. I'll just have to work out a tight schedule, that's all.
What about the lights?
Well, I'll take care of those, don't worry.
Why don't you put them up now?
Well, Harriet, I've got this whole big part to learn.
You can study while you're up on the ladder.
Are you kidding? This is Dickens' Christmas Carol. It's not Romeo and Juliet.
Oh, and what about the Christmas tree? Shall I get that?
I have to go downtown anyway and pick up some tree ornaments.
No, Harriet, I told you, I'll take care of the Christmas tree.
One thing at a time.
Okay.
Christmas ba humbug.
Deck the halls with boughs of holly, fa la la la la la la la la.
Bob Cratchit? So you'll want a day off tomorrow, I suppose.
Convenient. Of course it's not convenient.
Once a year.
A poor excuse for picking a man's pocket every 25th of December.
Ebenezer Scrooge. Ebenezer Scrooge.
How now? Who are you?
Ask me who I was.
Who was you? Who were you?
In life I was your partner, Jacob Marley.
No, no, no. See, you're Marley's ghost. I'm Scrooge.
In life I was your partner, Jacob Marley.
See, that's your name. You're Jacob Marley, or Marley's ghost. Try it again.
In life I was your partner, Jacob Marley.
You're Marley's ghost.
That I am. That I am.
Did you say that there?
No, but I just thought it fit pretty good.
Don't ad lib. Just give me the lines where they're written there, because that's the way I'm supposed to learn them.
I can't believe it.
It must be my indigestion.
For all I know, you may be an undigested bit of beef.
A blot of mustard.
A crumb of cheese.
A fragment of an underdone potato.
Did I leave anything out there?
How about a pistachio ice cream soda with an onion in it?
Spoil the mood, David.
Hey, what are you doing anyway? That's my sheet.
I'm helping Pop rehearse.
But Rick, the problem with you is you got no artistic appreciation.
Rick?
Rick, give me the next line.
Ozzie?
What do you want?
I was in the boys' room. I thought you were putting up the light.
Well, I was on my way up to the roof, and I dropped into the boys' room to rehearse my part.
Well, there's a telephone call for you.
Oh, here he comes now, Joe. Joe Randolph.
Why don't you come down the stairs?
Oh, I went up the ladder.
Hello, Joe.
Oh, hi, Oz. I was just wondering, did you find your Santa Claus outfit?
Oh, not yet, but I know where it is. It's right up in the attic. Don't worry about it.
Okay, just checking on everybody.
I'll see you tomorrow night around 7 o'clock. So long, Joe.
Where are you going?
Up to get my Santa Claus outfit before I forget it.
What about the light?
Oh, well, I'll crawl out the attic window and fix them on the way down.
Oh, Mr. Nelson. Mr. Nelson.
Oh, hello, Miss Brewster.
I stopped by to tell you we'll pick you up tomorrow night at 9 o'clock.
Gee, I hope I'm finished at the men's club on time.
I have some more music here for you.
Oh, I'll be right down.
Ebenezer Scrooge.
No, not now, Rick.
Your part is all marked in red.
Oh, you are a bass, aren't you?
Well, I don't think so.
Oh, dear, I'd appreciate it very much if you would be a bass.
We're so shy on basses this year.
Oh, well, all right. I've already learned the one bass part, you know.
Oh, that's just fine. Well, see you tomorrow night. Bye.
Okay.
Deck the halls with boughs of holly, fa la la la la la la la.
I'm dreaming of a white Christmas.
Deck the halls with boughs of holly, fa la la la la la la la.
Ebenezer Scrooge.
Oh, there you are.
You're neither Marley nor his ghost.
I'm Marley's brother.
Oh, no, Marley's brother.
We dine.
But I gotta fix the lights.
In the May case, Scrooge, the festive board is set with a blot of mustard and all that other jazz.
Deck the halls with boughs of holly, fa la la la la la la la.
Oh, Ebenezer Scrooge.
Oh, no, who are you?
I'm Santy Claw's wife, and I freshed your suit. Here, I'll put it on.
Oh, I fixed his beard for you, Pop. The wire was bent.
Oh, thank you, Dave.
I get it.
Say, how about the lights on the house tonight's your last chance?
Well, I'll put them up as soon as I get back from buying the tree.
Hello?
Oh, hi, Joe.
Well, he's gotta be over at the men's club by 8 o'clock.
Oh, okay, I'll tell him.
What was that all about?
Well, that was Joe Randolph, and they've changed the plans.
They've got so many children, they're gonna give two parties at the orphanage.
One at 6 and one at 7.30.
I can't be there by 6.
Oh, sure you can. Oh, will you get that?
What time are the Christmas carols, Pop?
Oh, they're at 9 o'clock.
Hi, Doc.
Hi, Oz. Say, I'm in kind of a hurry.
I got an emergency call from the hospital.
Would you do me a favor and run down and pick up the costumes?
They're being altered. Here's the address.
Be sure and try the pants on.
Remember, they were kind of tight across the seat.
What does a man take a job for if he's not gonna do it?
Want me to drive you over there, Pop?
Oh, yeah, maybe that's a good idea, Dave.
This is way up the other side of town.
Well, dinner's practically ready.
Hey, I don't have time to eat dinner.
I'll go start the car.
Oh, thanks, Dave.
Boy, here we go again.
It's a fine way to spend Christmas Eve.
Oh, don't forget your beard.
Thanks.
Where'll I meet you?
I've got a couple things to do, so I'll meet you back here, okay?
Okay, bye.
Bye.
Coming.
Good luck.
You think these pants are awfully tight?
Oh, no, that's the way they wore them in those days.
You better try the coat on, Pop. It's getting awful late.
Gee, looks great, Pop.
Thank you.
Uh, is this all right, Mr. Nelson?
Oh, yeah, that'll be fine. Thank you.
Merry Christmas, boys and girls.
Merry Christmas.
Lots of toys for little girls and boys.
Gee, thanks, Oz. It was swell.
Glad to do it, Joe.
I'd better get back to the kids.
Okay, I'll see you.
I don't know how to thank you, Mr. Nelson.
The children had a wonderful time.
Well, it was my pleasure.
Three o'clock.
Okay, I'll be right there.
I'll be seeing you.
Oh, Mr. Nelson, you dropped your beard.
Oh, thank you.
See what I tell ya.
Merry Christmas, Uncle.
Merry Christmas, bah, humbug.
Uncle, don't be cross.
What else can I be when I live in a world of fools such as this?
Merry Christmas, bah, humbug.
You keep Christmas in your way.
Your way.
I'll keep Christmas in mine.
Uncle, I have fun to see you in homage to Christmas,
and I'll keep my Christmas spirit to the last.
Well, nonetheless, I'll see you in my house.
I'll keep my Christmas spirit to the last.
Well, nonetheless, Merry Christmas, Uncle.
Merry Christmas, bah, humbug.
I'm sure glad you weren't there.
It was so darn embarrassing.
Oh, I wouldn't worry about it, dear.
They probably thought it was part of the play.
Yeah, I thought it was swell, Pop.
Everybody laughed.
That's for sure.
See, I didn't get a Christmas tree.
Oh, Ricky's getting one.
Rick?
Sorry, Pop.
This is the best I could do.
They're all sold out.
Well, it wasn't your fault, son.
I should have bought a tree weeks ago.
Ay.
What's the matter?
Oh, I banged my knee.
Trying to climb in and out of the car so darn fast.
Oh, it's a shame, dear.
Oh, I meant to tell you, Pop.
I got a parking ticket outside the men's club.
Gee, I didn't know it was a red zone.
Boy, that does it.
That's the end.
Here, let me see it, babe.
I spend all week knocking myself out, and what do I wind up with?
A broken leg, a parking ticket,
a scraggly, scrawny-looking Christmas tree.
Hey, wait a minute.
This isn't a parking ticket.
It says you are hereby sentenced to a Merry Christmas
and a Happy New Year.
Don't forget the policeman's ball January 15th.
Silent night
Holy night
All is calm
All is bright
Round yon virgin
Mother and child
Isn't that beautiful?
Sure is.
It sure is.
Well, come on, gang.
Let's join the carolers.
Yeah, come on.
Let's go, boys.
Hey, it's snowing outside.
Yeah, how about that?
Oh, how wonderful.
Harriet, where's my top coat?
It's in the den there.
In the den?
Surprise!
Oh, Harriet, this is beautiful.
Gee, thanks, fellas.
It's going to be the most wonderful Christmas we've ever had.
I think so, too.
Oh, what fun it is to ride in a one-horse open sleigh
Oh, jingle bells, jingle bells
Jingle all the way
Oh, what fun it is to ride in a one-horse
One-horse open sleigh
Merry Christmas!
Oh, that's wonderful.
Merry Christmas!
Hey, Osh, what happened?
You usually have lights up in front of the house.
Yeah, what happened?
I know it, Doc.
I kept promising Harriet I'd put them up,
but I just never got around to it.
It's all my fault.
Okay, Ricky, hit the switch.
Hey!
Who did that?
Ricky and I did.
We didn't want you and David to have all the fun.
Well, how about that?
A man doesn't know what goes on in his own house.
Well, come on, let's get going.
How about Deck the Halls?
I've been practicing the bass part all week.
Okay, here we go.
Deck, deck the halls with boughs of holly
Fa la la la la la la la la
Tis the season to be jolly
Fa la la la la la la la la
Tis the season to be jolly
Fa la la la la la la la la
Troll the ancient yule-tide carol
Fa la la la la la la la la
Deck the halls with boughs of holly
Fa la la la la la la la la la la
Tis the season to be jolly
Well, that's what happened at the Nelson household
during Christmas week in 1956, eight years ago.
And here we are, it's practically Christmas 1964.
We're all a few years older,
and our family is a little bigger, we're happy to say.
In fact, there are eight of us now, instead of four.
So if you'll stay with us for just a moment,
we'll be right back while Rick sings the Christmas song,
and we'll meet the entire family.
That's Dave and June and their little boy Danny,
and Rick and Chris and their little daughter Tracy.
We'll be back in just 60 seconds.
Chestnuts roasting on an open fire
Jack Frost nipping at your nose
Yule-tide carols being sung by a choir
And folks dressed up like Eskimos
Everybody knows a turkey and some mistletoe
Help to make the season bright
Tiny tots with their eyes all aglow
We'll find it hard to sleep tonight
They know that Santa's on his way
He's loaded lots of toys and goodies on his sleigh
And every mother's child is gonna spy
To see if reindeer really know how to fly
And so I'm offering this simple phrase
To kids from one to ninety-two
Although it's been said many times, many ways
Merry Christmas to you
Now on behalf of all us Nelsons, Dave, June and Danny,
Rick and Chris and Tracy and Harriet and myself,
we want to wish you a very Merry Christmas.
Merry Christmas!
Thank you!
Tonight's Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet was brought to you by your gas company,
which helps you live modern for less with gas.
That's what we Nelsons do.