WEBVTT 00:00.000 --> 00:03.500 Henry! Henry Ulrich! 00:03.500 --> 00:04.500 Coming, Mother! 00:17.500 --> 00:21.000 Thank heaven, American boys eventually grow up. 00:21.000 --> 00:24.000 But no matter how important or how old they become, 00:24.000 --> 00:26.500 they always like to grow down to boyhood again, 00:26.500 --> 00:30.500 to recapture their teenage and the adventures of Henry Ulrich. 00:30.500 --> 00:33.000 The scene opens in the Ulrich front hall. 00:33.000 --> 00:35.000 It is Saturday morning. 00:35.000 --> 00:37.500 Well, I guess I'm just about all set, Homer. 00:37.500 --> 00:39.000 Gee, Henry. 00:39.000 --> 00:42.000 Gee, how'd you ever talk your folks into it? 00:42.000 --> 00:43.500 I didn't have to, Homer. 00:43.500 --> 00:47.000 After all, it's the most natural thing in the world to do. 00:47.000 --> 00:52.000 Boy, I bet this is the biggest day in your life since your first pair of long pants. 00:52.000 --> 00:54.000 Gee, Homer. Gee whiz. 00:54.000 --> 00:59.000 My mother and father just suddenly realized that I've reached the age of manhood. 00:59.000 --> 01:00.500 Gee, I wish I would. 01:00.500 --> 01:01.500 Henry! 01:01.500 --> 01:02.500 Yes, Mother? 01:02.500 --> 01:03.500 Have you got your money? 01:03.500 --> 01:04.500 Sure, Mother. 01:04.500 --> 01:06.500 Well, here, I want you to tie it up in this handkerchief. 01:06.500 --> 01:07.500 Mother! 01:07.500 --> 01:10.000 Oh, Alice, stop worrying. He won't lose it. 01:10.000 --> 01:14.000 Sure. Gee whiz, didn't we all agree I wasn't a kin anymore? 01:14.000 --> 01:15.500 That's right, son. 01:15.500 --> 01:18.000 Now run along and use your own judgment about the whole thing. 01:18.000 --> 01:22.000 Thanks, Dad. And Homer, when we get down there, I don't want you saying anything. 01:22.000 --> 01:23.000 Nothing at all. 01:23.000 --> 01:25.000 Only if I ask for your opinion. 01:25.000 --> 01:28.000 And even if he asks you, Homer, please don't interfere. 01:28.000 --> 01:31.000 We want Henry to make his decision entirely on his own. 01:31.000 --> 01:33.000 Sure. Come on, Homer. Let's go. 01:33.000 --> 01:35.500 Only, Henry, if you really can't decide, be sure and phone me. 01:35.500 --> 01:36.500 I'll be okay, Mother. 01:36.500 --> 01:37.500 Good luck, Henry. 01:37.500 --> 01:38.500 Dear, have you got the handkerchief? 01:38.500 --> 01:40.000 Yes, Mother. Good-bye. 01:40.000 --> 01:41.500 Well, please be careful, and Henry... 01:41.500 --> 01:43.000 Alice, let him go. 01:43.000 --> 01:45.500 Sam, we should never have let him do it. 01:45.500 --> 01:49.000 No, Alice, Henry's perfectly capable of handling a thing like this by himself. 01:49.000 --> 01:52.000 Well, maybe he is. But just the same... 01:52.000 --> 01:53.000 Why are you putting your coat on? 01:53.000 --> 01:56.000 Sam, I'm going to stay a good hundred yards behind him. 01:56.000 --> 01:58.000 Alice, you're going to do no such thing. 02:09.000 --> 02:12.000 Well, here I am, everybody. How do you like me? 02:13.000 --> 02:14.000 Henry! 02:14.000 --> 02:16.000 Henry, oh, Henry, oh, this is your fault. Thanks. 02:16.000 --> 02:17.500 Gee whiz, what's so terrible? 02:17.500 --> 02:19.000 Sam, speak to him. 02:19.000 --> 02:22.000 I refuse to say a word to him until he takes that thing off his head. 02:22.000 --> 02:23.000 You... 02:23.000 --> 02:26.000 You mean you don't like the hat, Father? 02:26.000 --> 02:29.000 After you told me I could choose my own? 02:29.000 --> 02:31.000 All he needs now is spats and a cane. 02:31.000 --> 02:33.000 Henry, I hardly know what to say to you. 02:33.000 --> 02:34.000 But, Mother... 02:34.000 --> 02:36.000 My goodness, a straw hat! 02:36.000 --> 02:39.000 Dear, what on earth possessed you to buy a thing like that? 02:39.000 --> 02:43.000 Look, Mother, it's a genuine West Indian straw worth 14.50. 02:43.000 --> 02:47.000 And on account of winter coming on, I got it for only three dollars. 02:47.000 --> 02:51.000 Did you suppose any of my friends saw him walking along under that? 02:51.000 --> 02:53.000 Mary, Mother said I could pick it out myself. 02:53.000 --> 02:55.000 Oh, no, I didn't. 02:55.000 --> 02:59.000 Sam, you were the one who decided your son could choose his own clothes from now on. 02:59.000 --> 03:01.000 Alice, he's your son as much as he is mine. 03:01.000 --> 03:06.000 Look, look, let me sort of walk away from you, Mother, so you can get a better perspective. 03:06.000 --> 03:07.000 What's that? 03:07.000 --> 03:10.000 The whole trouble is everybody's just looking at it too closely. 03:10.000 --> 03:12.000 Pretend I'm walking down the street, see? 03:12.000 --> 03:13.000 Yes. 03:13.000 --> 03:15.000 Doesn't the hat begin to look better? 03:15.000 --> 03:17.000 Keep on walking, Henry. 03:17.000 --> 03:20.000 Sure, you see my coin? 03:20.000 --> 03:22.000 There, now it looks fine. 03:22.000 --> 03:24.000 But Father, I'm out in the hall! 03:24.000 --> 03:26.000 Recycling! 03:26.000 --> 03:30.000 Henry, will you please stop this foolishness and come back here? 03:30.000 --> 03:33.000 Mother, won't you please try to look at the overall effect? 03:33.000 --> 03:37.000 You always have to make an adjustment when you see a man you're not used to in a hat. 03:37.000 --> 03:38.000 Oh, I mean... 03:38.000 --> 03:40.000 Henry, let's not waste any more time talking. 03:40.000 --> 03:44.000 You'll just have to march straight down to the Emporium and return that hat. 03:44.000 --> 03:45.000 Return it? 03:45.000 --> 03:47.000 Mother, you don't mean... 03:47.000 --> 03:49.000 You're just kidding, aren't you? 03:49.000 --> 03:51.000 I've never been more serious in my life. 03:51.000 --> 03:53.000 But gee whiz, Mother, I can. 03:53.000 --> 03:55.000 Father, you see my side, don't you? 03:55.000 --> 03:59.000 Sam, will you please explain to Henry that you were wrong about the whole thing? 03:59.000 --> 04:02.000 As a matter of fact, Alice, I just remembered some work I have to do. 04:02.000 --> 04:03.000 Sam! 04:03.000 --> 04:06.000 Mother, look, I can't go back. I can't. 04:06.000 --> 04:09.000 Henry, it's a perfectly simple matter to walk into a store and say, 04:09.000 --> 04:12.000 I've changed my mind about this and I'd like my money back, please. 04:12.000 --> 04:14.000 Of course it is, Henry. 04:14.000 --> 04:15.000 Oh, boy. 04:15.000 --> 04:17.000 My goodness, I do it all the time. 04:17.000 --> 04:21.000 But Mother, the clerk will think that I don't know my own mind. 04:21.000 --> 04:24.000 Just tell him your mother refuses to let you wear it. 04:24.000 --> 04:26.000 After him calling me, sir? 04:26.000 --> 04:36.000 Oh, gee whiz, I can't walk into a store and start talking about my mother as if I was a little boy. 04:36.000 --> 04:39.000 Dear, even big boys have mothers. Now please start. 04:39.000 --> 04:44.000 Gee whiz, Mother, I can't. I just can't. 04:44.000 --> 04:47.000 Very well. Mary, will you please take Henry by the hand and- 04:47.000 --> 04:49.000 Mary, don't you touch me! 04:49.000 --> 04:51.000 Mary, are you ready to go by yourself? 04:51.000 --> 04:55.000 Mother, listen, won't you please try to look at it this way? 04:55.000 --> 05:09.000 Yes, sir, is there something I can do for you? 05:09.000 --> 05:16.000 Why, yes, as a matter of fact, I- Homer, how would you like to sort of step over there and look at those coats a minute? 05:16.000 --> 05:17.000 Well, Henry, I'm interested. 05:17.000 --> 05:20.000 Oh, you're interested in buying a coat, young man? 05:20.000 --> 05:23.000 Me? Gee whiz, no, I've got a coat. 05:23.000 --> 05:25.000 Homer. 05:25.000 --> 05:27.000 Well, I guess it wouldn't do any harm to investigate. 05:27.000 --> 05:32.000 Look, mister, look, about this hat, it isn't that I don't like it. 05:32.000 --> 05:41.000 I knew you'd like it, sir. Why, in all my years in hats, I've never seen a face that fitted a hat the way yours fits that one. 05:41.000 --> 05:47.000 Yeah, sure, only that's exactly what worries me, the fit. 05:47.000 --> 05:50.000 The fit? Well, we can certainly remedy that. 05:50.000 --> 05:51.000 You can? 05:51.000 --> 05:55.000 Well, I don't mean the fit so much as, well, as my doctor. 05:55.000 --> 05:56.000 What's that? 05:56.000 --> 06:02.000 I don't know how it slipped my mind, but according to my doctor, I shouldn't wear a hat, I think. 06:02.000 --> 06:03.000 Why not? 06:03.000 --> 06:07.000 Well, I'm sort of losing my hair. 06:07.000 --> 06:12.000 Oh, is that so? Well, if you're really losing your hair, you don't ever want to be seen without a hat. 06:12.000 --> 06:13.000 I don't? 06:13.000 --> 06:16.000 No, sir. Now, just let me set it back on your head. 06:16.000 --> 06:17.000 But, mister, what I- 06:17.000 --> 06:20.000 Always remember to give it a pat, like this. There you are. 06:20.000 --> 06:21.000 Well, sure, only- 06:21.000 --> 06:23.000 How do I look in this? 06:23.000 --> 06:24.000 Homer, where are you? 06:24.000 --> 06:27.000 Right here, inside this coat, isn't it? 06:27.000 --> 06:30.000 Young man, are you interested in buying that raccoon coat? 06:30.000 --> 06:32.000 I'm interested, sure. How much is it? 06:32.000 --> 06:33.000 Three hundred dollars. 06:33.000 --> 06:38.000 Yeah? Well, frankly, I've suddenly lost interest. 06:38.000 --> 06:43.000 Mister, look. Look, about this hat, I've, I've decided to return it. 06:43.000 --> 06:44.000 Return it? 06:44.000 --> 06:47.000 Sure, and I'd like my money back, please, if you don't mind. Well, that is- 06:47.000 --> 06:49.000 What's the matter? Didn't your mother like the hat? 06:49.000 --> 06:51.000 My m-mother? 06:51.000 --> 06:54.000 Gee, she has nothing to do with it. 06:54.000 --> 06:55.000 Well, that is- 06:55.000 --> 06:57.000 Well, I'm sorry, sir, but I'm afraid we can't take it back. 06:57.000 --> 06:58.000 Why not? 06:58.000 --> 06:59.000 What about your initials? 06:59.000 --> 07:00.000 Oh, I forgot about the initials. 07:00.000 --> 07:04.000 There they are, right on the sweatband. H-A, as large as life. 07:04.000 --> 07:05.000 We never take a hat back once it's been initialed. 07:05.000 --> 07:06.000 But couldn't you remove them? 07:06.000 --> 07:07.000 Remove them? 07:07.000 --> 07:08.000 Yeah. 07:08.000 --> 07:11.000 Well, how could we remove initials? They're perforated. Look, H-A. 07:11.000 --> 07:18.000 Oh, well, couldn't you just add a T to the H-A, and then you'd have H-A-T? You know? 07:18.000 --> 07:20.000 No, just a minute, son. 07:29.000 --> 07:30.000 Hello? 07:30.000 --> 07:31.000 Hello? 07:31.000 --> 07:34.000 Hello. Is this Mr. Harold Acorn? 07:34.000 --> 07:35.000 Allcorn, Henry. 07:35.000 --> 07:36.000 What's that? 07:36.000 --> 07:37.000 I mean, allcorn. 07:37.000 --> 07:38.000 Yeah? Who's this? 07:38.000 --> 07:42.000 Well, you don't know me, see? I just found your name in the phone book. 07:42.000 --> 07:43.000 You did? 07:43.000 --> 07:48.000 Sure. I'm phoning everybody I can find who has the initials, H-A. 07:48.000 --> 07:52.000 And, look, how would you feel about a swell new hat? 07:52.000 --> 07:55.000 Yeah? What program is this? 07:55.000 --> 07:56.000 What program? 07:56.000 --> 07:59.000 Sure. Didn't you say you were giving away a hat? 07:59.000 --> 08:01.000 No, gee whiz, I'm selling it. 08:01.000 --> 08:02.000 Selling it? 08:02.000 --> 08:05.000 Look, just let me ask you this. What size is your head? 08:05.000 --> 08:07.000 Eight and a half. What's it to you? 08:07.000 --> 08:13.000 Eight and a half? Wow. So just forget the whole thing. Goodbye. 08:13.000 --> 08:16.000 Quick, let's see the phone book, Homer. Are there any more H-As? 08:16.000 --> 08:19.000 Sure, only I think all this phoning is hopeless. 08:19.000 --> 08:24.000 Homer, there just has to be one H-A in Centerville with a six and a half head size who needs a hat. 08:24.000 --> 08:25.000 What's the next number? 08:25.000 --> 08:27.000 Elm 669. 08:27.000 --> 08:28.000 Number, please. 08:28.000 --> 08:29.000 Elm 669. 08:29.000 --> 08:30.000 Elm 669. 08:30.000 --> 08:32.000 How'd you make out on Mr. Allcorn, him? 08:32.000 --> 08:35.000 Boy, he was the biggest sore head I ever heard of. 08:35.000 --> 08:37.000 Yeah, eight and a half. 08:37.000 --> 08:41.000 But I've got a feeling this is my lucky customer coming up. 08:41.000 --> 08:43.000 Gee, Hen, I sure hope so. 08:43.000 --> 08:44.000 Hello? 08:44.000 --> 08:47.000 Hello, may I speak to H. Andrews, please? 08:47.000 --> 08:49.000 Well, this is Hildegard Andrews. 08:49.000 --> 08:52.000 Hildegard? 08:52.000 --> 08:54.000 Yes, who's this? 08:54.000 --> 08:57.000 Well, gee, gee, I don't think you'd be interested. 08:57.000 --> 09:01.000 Well, I might be. Come on, who is it? 09:01.000 --> 09:05.000 Well, no, no, no, I'm sure you wouldn't be. Goodbye. 09:05.000 --> 09:07.000 Homer, we're just not getting any place. 09:07.000 --> 09:10.000 Hey, Henry, I just got a swell idea. Why don't you fill in the police department? 09:10.000 --> 09:11.000 The police? 09:11.000 --> 09:16.000 Sure. After all, they keep fingerprints. Maybe they keep head sizes, too. 09:16.000 --> 09:18.000 Homer, you're crazy. 09:18.000 --> 09:19.000 Henry! 09:18.000 --> 09:19.000 Oh, boy. 09:19.000 --> 09:21.000 Henry, haven't you left yet? 09:21.000 --> 09:23.000 Last mother? For where? 09:23.000 --> 09:27.000 Dear, didn't we decide you were to take your hat down to the Emporium and get your money back? 09:27.000 --> 09:30.000 Well, I'll tell you, Mother, I did go down, see? 09:30.000 --> 09:31.000 Oh, you did? Fine. 09:31.000 --> 09:35.000 Sure, and I had a long talk with the clerk, see? 09:35.000 --> 09:37.000 Oh, and he gave you your three dollars back? 09:37.000 --> 09:38.000 Why, not exactly. 09:38.000 --> 09:39.000 You mean he gave you credit? 09:39.000 --> 09:40.000 Credit? 09:40.000 --> 09:45.000 That's just as good, Henry. You and I will go down later this afternoon and pick out another hat for you. 09:45.000 --> 09:47.000 Mother, wait, you don't understand. 09:47.000 --> 09:52.000 Yes, I do understand how you feel, but until you're a few years older, you need help in selecting your clothes. 09:52.000 --> 09:54.000 Well, Mother, if you don't let me explain... 09:54.000 --> 09:57.000 Let's not talk about it now, dear. I have to start lunch. 09:57.000 --> 09:59.000 Gee, whiz, Homer, my mother thinks I returned the hat. 09:59.000 --> 10:01.000 Why didn't you set her straight? 10:01.000 --> 10:05.000 I tried to, Homer. What's she going to do when she finds out I've hidden it up in my room? 10:05.000 --> 10:07.000 Boy, you're in a spot, Henry. 10:07.000 --> 10:08.000 Wait a minute. 10:08.000 --> 10:09.000 Who are you going to phone? 10:09.000 --> 10:12.000 The Centerville Times. I've got the whole thing figured out. 10:12.000 --> 10:13.000 Help me, please. 10:13.000 --> 10:14.000 L-909. 10:14.000 --> 10:15.000 L-909. 10:15.000 --> 10:16.000 Who's that for times? 10:16.000 --> 10:17.000 Tim. 10:17.000 --> 10:21.000 Mary's boyfriend, Kermit, and he always said if there's anything he can do for me, he'd be glad to do it. 10:21.000 --> 10:22.000 Yeah? 10:22.000 --> 10:25.000 Sure, and I know he'll be just crazy about my hat, even if his initials are in H.A. 10:25.000 --> 10:27.000 Centerville Times, Editor Blankstein. 10:27.000 --> 10:31.000 I'd like to speak to one of your reporters, please, Kermit Hannigan. 10:31.000 --> 10:33.000 Hannigan isn't there, sorry. 10:33.000 --> 10:36.000 He isn't? Oh, just a minute. Homer, he isn't there. 10:36.000 --> 10:38.000 He isn't? Well, why not leave a message? 10:38.000 --> 10:39.000 Sure. Hello? 10:39.000 --> 10:40.000 Yes? 10:40.000 --> 10:43.000 Look, could I leave a message, please? A very important message. 10:43.000 --> 10:44.000 Who is this? 10:44.000 --> 10:53.000 Why, you wouldn't know me, but I'm a member of the general public who reads your paper, and I'm trying to locate somebody with the initials H.A. 10:53.000 --> 10:54.000 You mean he's lost? 10:54.000 --> 10:55.000 Lost? 10:55.000 --> 10:58.000 No, gee whiz, I just have to find him. 10:58.000 --> 10:59.000 Why not call the police department? 10:59.000 --> 11:02.000 The police? Would they fool around with a thing like this? 11:02.000 --> 11:03.000 I told you, Henry. 11:03.000 --> 11:05.000 Well, that all depends. What's this fellow done? 11:05.000 --> 11:08.000 Who? The fellow that wouldn't give me my money back? 11:08.000 --> 11:10.000 He wouldn't? Well, how much was involved? 11:10.000 --> 11:11.000 Well, gee, every cent I had. 11:11.000 --> 11:15.000 Is that so? All right, let's have all the information. Initials H.A.? 11:15.000 --> 11:18.000 Sure, with a six and a half head size. 11:18.000 --> 11:19.000 How are they going to help you, Henry? 11:19.000 --> 11:21.000 Homer, will you please be the... Hello? 11:21.000 --> 11:22.000 Hello? 11:21.000 --> 11:24.000 Okay, Henry, I can take a hint. Mrs. Aldridge? 11:24.000 --> 11:27.000 The important thing is he has to light storehouse. 11:27.000 --> 11:29.000 Are you in the living room, Mrs. Aldridge? 11:29.000 --> 11:33.000 Yes, Homer. Mr. Aldridge and I happen to be having a private discussion. 11:33.000 --> 11:36.000 Well, did I hear you say it was almost lunchtime? 11:36.000 --> 11:39.000 Not quite, Homer. You have plenty of time to get home. 11:43.000 --> 11:44.000 Yes, dear. 11:44.000 --> 11:49.000 Well, are you sure I can't help you in any way, Mrs. Aldridge? Set the table or anything? 11:49.000 --> 11:51.000 No, thank you. 11:51.000 --> 11:55.000 Oh. Well, I guess I'll be running along then. 11:55.000 --> 11:56.000 Goodbye, Homer. 11:57.000 --> 11:58.000 Where were we, Alice? 11:58.000 --> 12:02.000 I was saying, Sam, that you should take a lesson from what happened this morning and put your foot down. 12:02.000 --> 12:07.000 That was unfortunate, Alice, but I still maintain we should give Henry one more chance to choose his own hat. 12:07.000 --> 12:09.000 Sure, I agree with Mr. Aldridge. 12:09.000 --> 12:11.000 Homer, I thought you'd gone home. 12:11.000 --> 12:16.000 Alice, try to look at this whole thing from a boy's viewpoint. I was a boy once myself. 12:16.000 --> 12:17.000 Sure, so was I. 12:17.000 --> 12:22.000 If you lead him down to the emporium by the hand, you'll destroy every shred of his self-respect. 12:22.000 --> 12:24.000 Dear, I don't intend to take his hand. 12:24.000 --> 12:26.000 Psychologically, you'd be taking his hand. 12:26.000 --> 12:34.000 Sam, the important thing is Henry has to have a new hat. And since he isn't capable of choosing one himself, then someone has to do it for him. 12:34.000 --> 12:35.000 But, Mrs. Aldridge... 12:35.000 --> 12:37.000 Homer, will you please go home? 12:37.000 --> 12:40.000 Sam, listen to me. Someone has to help Henry. 12:40.000 --> 12:42.000 Farewell, Alice. Have it your own way. 12:42.000 --> 12:45.000 Oh, I'm glad you're being reasonable, Sam. And when you get down there... 12:45.000 --> 12:46.000 Down where? 12:46.000 --> 12:47.000 To the emporium with Henry. 12:47.000 --> 12:48.000 Alice, I'm not going with him. 12:48.000 --> 12:55.000 Yes, you are, Sam. I've changed my mind. You're a man. You are definitely the one to help Henry select a new hat. 12:55.000 --> 12:56.000 Now, wait a minute, Alice. 12:56.000 --> 12:57.000 I think so, too. 12:57.000 --> 12:59.000 Homer, will you please go home? 12:59.000 --> 13:06.000 Well, ladies, you'll never be in a predicament when it comes to making a choice if you choose gay shimmering jello for dessert. 13:06.000 --> 13:08.000 Tomorrow night, try raspberry pear whip. 13:08.000 --> 13:12.000 Just prepare a package of raspberry jello as usual, then whip it up. 13:12.000 --> 13:16.000 Fold in a cup of luscious pear pulp and chill until firm. 13:16.000 --> 13:20.000 All you have to do is put it in a glass jar and put it in the fridge. 13:20.000 --> 13:22.000 And then you can eat it. 13:22.000 --> 13:29.000 Put a package of raspberry jello as usual, then whip it up. Fold in a cup of luscious pear pulp and chill until firm. 13:29.000 --> 13:39.000 All six jello flavors, strawberry, raspberry, cherry, orange, lemon, and lime, have that wonderful locked-in goodness that reminds you of the real ripe fruit itself. 13:39.000 --> 13:43.000 Ask for jello, America's favorite gelatin dessert. 13:43.000 --> 13:52.000 And now, getting back to the troubles of Henry Aldridge. 13:52.000 --> 14:01.000 Having been told by his parents that he could choose his new hat himself, Henry came home this morning proudly exhibiting a genuine West Indian straw. 14:01.000 --> 14:06.000 And then, ordered to return the hat immediately, he ran into difficulties. 14:06.000 --> 14:10.000 Now, Henry is searching for someone to whom he can sell the hat. 14:10.000 --> 14:13.000 The scene opens in the Santaville Police Station. It is that afternoon. 14:13.000 --> 14:15.000 But, Sergeant, what's this fellow done? 14:15.000 --> 14:20.000 I don't know what he's done. All I've found out is the Centerville Times is on his trail and they'd sure like a chance to show us up. 14:20.000 --> 14:21.000 You're right. 14:21.000 --> 14:25.000 Now, here's all I know about him. His initials are H.A. and his head size is six and a half. 14:25.000 --> 14:27.000 His head size? That's a new one. 14:27.000 --> 14:31.000 From what I can gather, the main clue is a straw hat. Now, if you find that, we'll be on the right track. 14:31.000 --> 14:33.000 Okay, I'll start checking hats, doors, and cleaners. 14:33.000 --> 14:40.000 And if you run into anyone from the newspapers, don't let on. We don't know anything, but try to find out who it is we're looking for. 14:48.000 --> 14:49.000 Mary, please. 14:49.000 --> 14:52.000 Henry, let's go. I have to get ready for the beauty parlor. 14:52.000 --> 14:58.000 Mary, listen. If you had a brother and he was going to die any minute now, wouldn't you make a move to help him? 14:58.000 --> 14:59.000 Of course I would. 14:59.000 --> 15:01.000 Well, okay. I've got to have three dollars. 15:01.000 --> 15:03.000 Mary, do you think I'm made of money? 15:03.000 --> 15:07.000 But don't you realize Mother thinks I've got a credit of three dollars at the emporium and I haven't. 15:07.000 --> 15:11.000 And don't you realize that Kermit is coming here for dinner tonight and I'm a sight? 15:11.000 --> 15:14.000 Look, Mary, why waste your money in beauty parlors? 15:14.000 --> 15:15.000 What? 15:15.000 --> 15:21.000 If you're going to marry Kermit someday, don't you think the only fair thing to do is let him see you in your natural condition? 15:21.000 --> 15:23.000 Henry Aldrich! 15:23.000 --> 15:26.000 Mary, wait before you get mad. When is Kermit's birthday? 15:26.000 --> 15:27.000 In June. Why? 15:27.000 --> 15:32.000 Now, do you like to buy him a swell present? It's worth $14.50 and you can have it for three dollars. 15:32.000 --> 15:33.000 No. 15:33.000 --> 15:34.000 $2.95. 15:34.000 --> 15:36.000 No. And goodbye. I have to fix my hair. 15:36.000 --> 15:38.000 You mean you're not going to the beauty parlor? 15:38.000 --> 15:40.000 Of course I am, but I can't go there looking like this. 15:40.000 --> 15:44.000 Okay, Mary. Just wait until you want me to be best man at your wedding. 15:44.000 --> 15:45.000 Henry! 15:45.000 --> 15:48.000 Mother, are you sure there hasn't been a phone call for me? 15:48.000 --> 15:49.000 No, dear. 15:49.000 --> 15:52.000 Oh gee whiz, a reporter that won't even answer a phone call. 15:52.000 --> 15:57.000 Mary, I have to run over to your Aunt Harriet first, but I want you to meet me down at the Emporium in 45 minutes. 15:57.000 --> 15:58.000 At the Emporium? 15:58.000 --> 16:01.000 Yes. It seems your father has suddenly disappeared. 16:01.000 --> 16:06.000 Well, look, Mother, don't you think a new hat is just a waste of money? 16:06.000 --> 16:07.000 Certainly not. 16:07.000 --> 16:12.000 But gee, you know how I always lose everything, especially a hat. Why, I won't have it a half an hour. 16:12.000 --> 16:13.000 Now, hey, Mary. 16:13.000 --> 16:16.000 Gee whiz, Mother, I'd lose my head if it wasn't fastened on. 16:16.000 --> 16:21.000 Now, dear, you really need a hat and you have a credit of three dollars down at the Emporium. 16:21.000 --> 16:23.000 Mother, listen, there's something I've got to tell you. 16:23.000 --> 16:25.000 Tell me down at the Emporium in 45 minutes. 16:25.000 --> 16:27.000 But it'll be too late then. 16:27.000 --> 16:28.000 What, Homer? 16:28.000 --> 16:30.000 Excuse me, Mrs. Aldrich, did I knock you over? 16:30.000 --> 16:33.000 Not quite. And please don't be late, Henry. 16:33.000 --> 16:35.000 Hey, Henry, where's your hat? 16:35.000 --> 16:36.000 It's hidden up in my room. 16:36.000 --> 16:40.000 Listen, I found this pilot, see, who wants a straw hat. 16:40.000 --> 16:41.000 He does? 16:41.000 --> 16:46.000 Sure. He flies planes from Miami to Chicago and he wants a straw to wear while he's in Miami. 16:46.000 --> 16:48.000 Homer, you don't mean it. 16:48.000 --> 16:53.000 Sure, and his head size is six and a half and he doesn't care a darn about the initials. 16:53.000 --> 16:56.000 Oh, boy, Homer, let me shake your hand. 16:56.000 --> 16:57.000 Sure, shake. 16:57.000 --> 16:58.000 Shake. Ouch. 16:58.000 --> 17:02.000 Oh, I'm sorry, Homer. It's just that I'm so graceful. 17:02.000 --> 17:04.000 Well, stop twisting my arm and I'll give you his address. 17:04.000 --> 17:06.000 Sure, and then let's go upstairs and get the hat. 17:06.000 --> 17:08.000 You know what happened to me on the way over? 17:08.000 --> 17:09.000 What? 17:09.000 --> 17:11.000 A cop stopped me on the street and asked me my initials. 17:11.000 --> 17:12.000 He did? 17:12.000 --> 17:18.000 Sure, and when I told him H.B., he said I was just one letter out. 17:18.000 --> 17:22.000 It's funny. Do you suppose I nearly won a prize of some kind? 17:22.000 --> 17:23.000 I'll answer the phone, Henry. 17:23.000 --> 17:27.000 Okay, Mary, only if it's Kermit. Tell him he's missed his chance. 17:27.000 --> 17:28.000 Hello? 17:28.000 --> 17:30.000 Hello, Mary, dear. 17:30.000 --> 17:33.000 My Kermit. How are you, Kermit? 17:33.000 --> 17:37.000 Fine. As a matter of fact, Mary, I'm on top of the world. 17:37.000 --> 17:38.000 You are? 17:38.000 --> 17:44.000 I just wanted to prepare you. By the time I come over for dinner tonight, I might be out of the pictuaries. 17:44.000 --> 17:46.000 Really? My goodness, what's happening? 17:46.000 --> 17:51.000 Well, I haven't time to explain, Mary, but I'm working on a big story. I'm going to scoop the police department. 17:51.000 --> 17:52.000 No. 17:52.000 --> 18:00.000 Yes? So, it won't be long now, Mary, before you and I can talk over a breakfast table instead of a telephone. 18:00.000 --> 18:03.000 Oh, my. Oh, my goodness. 18:03.000 --> 18:06.000 Well, I've got to be getting along. Do you call, Mary? 18:06.000 --> 18:09.000 Of course. Goodbye, Kermit, and good luck. 18:09.000 --> 18:10.000 Mary! 18:10.000 --> 18:11.000 Yes, Henry? 18:11.000 --> 18:13.000 Listen, Mary, I give you my word. I didn't mean it. 18:13.000 --> 18:14.000 You didn't mean what? 18:14.000 --> 18:17.000 Anything. Anything I've ever said to you, except when I paid your compliment. 18:17.000 --> 18:18.000 Henry, get to the point. 18:18.000 --> 18:19.000 That's what I said. 18:19.000 --> 18:23.000 Mary, whatever I've done to you, let's both be good sports and give me back my hat. 18:23.000 --> 18:24.000 What hat? 18:24.000 --> 18:26.000 My West Indian straw that was up in my room. 18:26.000 --> 18:28.000 I haven't been anywhere near you. 18:28.000 --> 18:31.000 Mary, I haven't time to joke. Now, hand it over. 18:31.000 --> 18:32.000 But, Henry, I haven't got it. 18:32.000 --> 18:34.000 Listen, Mary, I'll have Father sue you. 18:34.000 --> 18:37.000 Go ahead. I'll sue you for false arrest. 18:37.000 --> 18:38.000 Henry, I don't think she's got it. 18:38.000 --> 18:41.000 But somebody's got it. I can't have lost it. 18:41.000 --> 18:44.000 Why not? You'd lose your head if it wasn't fastened on. 18:44.000 --> 18:48.000 Oh, boy. Homer, get out of my way. Maybe I put it in here. 18:50.000 --> 18:53.000 Henry, are you going to throw everything out of your hall closet? 18:53.000 --> 18:57.000 Hey, cut it out. You nearly hit me with that coat hanger. 18:57.000 --> 19:04.000 Henry, put down that rubber bow. 19:10.000 --> 19:12.000 Yes, sir, we clean and block hats. 19:12.000 --> 19:14.000 But what I want to know is, do you stretch them? 19:14.000 --> 19:15.000 Why, sure. 19:15.000 --> 19:19.000 Well, you see, this straw hat, it's a six and a half. It belongs to my son. 19:19.000 --> 19:22.000 And if it's possible, I'd like it stretched so it would fit me. 19:22.000 --> 19:23.000 Well, may I see the hat, please? 19:23.000 --> 19:24.000 Yes, certainly. 19:24.000 --> 19:25.000 Oh, it's a very fine hat. 19:25.000 --> 19:27.000 Yes, genuine West Indian straw. 19:27.000 --> 19:30.000 My, my, your son has good taste. You think so? 19:30.000 --> 19:32.000 To tell you the truth, I agree with you. 19:32.000 --> 19:33.000 I'm surprised he'd want to part with it. 19:33.000 --> 19:37.000 Well, he isn't anxious to, but his mother, so that is. 19:37.000 --> 19:39.000 I understand what you mean. I'm a married man myself. 19:39.000 --> 19:46.000 It isn't that mothers mean to be unreasonable. It's just that through no fault of their own, they're, well, they're women. 19:46.000 --> 19:48.000 That's quite true. 19:48.000 --> 19:51.000 So I'd like to help my son out and buy this hat from him. 19:51.000 --> 19:54.000 Initials A.J., huh? Now, do you think you could stretch it? 19:54.000 --> 19:58.000 I'm pretty sure I can, sir. It'll only take about ten minutes. 19:58.000 --> 19:59.000 Good, that's fine. 19:59.000 --> 20:04.000 Just make yourself comfortable while I step into the back room. And don't go away. 20:04.000 --> 20:14.000 Hello? 20:14.000 --> 20:15.000 Hello, is that you, Mary? 20:15.000 --> 20:18.000 Yes, Mother, I just got back from the beauty parlor. Where are you? 20:18.000 --> 20:23.000 Down at the Emporium. I've been waiting for nearly two hours. Have you any idea where Henry is? 20:23.000 --> 20:28.000 He isn't here. And Mother, do you realize it's almost dinner time and Kermit will be here any minute? 20:28.000 --> 20:33.000 Oh, my goodness, I've forgotten. Mary, you'd better start peeling potatoes and let your father entertain Kermit. 20:33.000 --> 20:34.000 But Father isn't here either. 20:34.000 --> 20:38.000 He isn't. Well, dear, I'll get a taxi and be home in five minutes. 20:38.000 --> 20:39.000 All right, Mother, goodbye. 20:39.000 --> 20:40.000 Goodbye, dear. 20:40.000 --> 20:42.000 Father, where did you come from? 20:42.000 --> 20:44.000 Good evening, Mary. 20:44.000 --> 20:46.000 My goodness, that straw hat you have. That's Henry. 20:46.000 --> 20:51.000 Mary, I don't want to hear this hat mentioned again in this house. Do you understand? 20:51.000 --> 20:53.000 Father, you look upset. Is anything wrong? 20:53.000 --> 20:58.000 Mary, let me ask you something. Do I look to you like a common criminal? 20:58.000 --> 21:03.000 Of course not, Father. You don't look the least bit common. 21:03.000 --> 21:06.000 Mary, I've just come from the police station. 21:06.000 --> 21:08.000 The police station? What did you go down there for? 21:08.000 --> 21:10.000 I was taken down there in a police car. 21:10.000 --> 21:11.000 You were, Father? 21:11.000 --> 21:12.000 I was arrested. 21:12.000 --> 21:14.000 Really, Father? Really? And truly? 21:14.000 --> 21:18.000 One minute I was sitting quietly in the cleaners thumbing through the hats by his monthly. 21:18.000 --> 21:22.000 And the next minute I was sitting under a bright light answering questions. 21:22.000 --> 21:28.000 It seems the cleaner telephoned some eager Beaver newspaper reporter and he sent the police down. 21:28.000 --> 21:29.000 But why did they arrest you? 21:29.000 --> 21:32.000 How should I know? They didn't even know themselves. 21:32.000 --> 21:37.000 Excuse me, Father, I've got a phone Kermit. My goodness, when a prominent lawyer gets arrested, that's news. 21:37.000 --> 21:38.000 Mary, put down that phone. 21:38.000 --> 21:39.000 But Father. 21:39.000 --> 21:45.000 Put it down. Do you really mean you'd sell your own father down the river just to get Kermit out of obituaries? 21:45.000 --> 21:47.000 But Father, our whole future is involved. 21:47.000 --> 21:48.000 So is mine. 21:48.000 --> 21:49.000 Yours, Father? 21:49.000 --> 21:52.000 Age it as I am, Mary. I have a few good years left. 21:52.000 --> 21:54.000 Please answer the phone. 21:54.000 --> 21:56.000 Hello? 21:56.000 --> 21:58.000 Hello, Mary. This is Kermit. 21:58.000 --> 22:01.000 Oh my goodness, you did it. Hello, Kermit. 22:01.000 --> 22:05.000 Mary, I'm afraid I won't be able to come up for dinner tonight after all. 22:05.000 --> 22:06.000 You won't? Why not? 22:06.000 --> 22:12.000 I'd rather not go into details, Mary, but a case I was working on more or less blew up right in my face. 22:12.000 --> 22:15.000 Oh, Kermit, that's a shame. 22:15.000 --> 22:17.000 Yeah, oh well. 22:17.000 --> 22:21.000 Never mind, Kermit. I've got a scoop for you. Only you have to promise not to print it. 22:21.000 --> 22:22.000 What is it? 22:22.000 --> 22:24.000 Guess what happened to my father. 22:24.000 --> 22:26.000 Mary, I really have to go now. 22:26.000 --> 22:28.000 I meant aren't you interested? He was arrested. 22:28.000 --> 22:35.000 Oh, arrested? Well, I'm certainly surprised. Arrested? Why, that's terrible. Well, goodbye, Mary. 22:35.000 --> 22:39.000 You're hanging up right in the middle of our conversation. And Kermit, why can't you come to dinner tonight? 22:39.000 --> 22:41.000 I've got to cover an obituary. 22:41.000 --> 22:43.000 Hello, everybody. I'm home. 22:43.000 --> 22:45.000 Welcome, Mary. Could you meet me on the corner? 22:45.000 --> 22:46.000 From the corner? 22:46.000 --> 22:49.000 Mary, I'm... gee whiz, here it is, my sly. 22:49.000 --> 22:53.000 Wait a minute, Kermit. Henry Aldrich, what on earth have you got on your head? 22:53.000 --> 22:55.000 What does it look like, Mary? Mother! 22:55.000 --> 22:56.000 Hello, Kermit, listen. 22:56.000 --> 22:57.000 Mother, are you in the living room? 22:57.000 --> 22:59.000 No, Henry, she isn't home yet. 22:59.000 --> 23:04.000 She isn't? Oh, boy. Once she gets here, Father, will you help me explain how I got tied up? 23:04.000 --> 23:06.000 Hey, wait a minute, Henry. What's that thing on your head? 23:06.000 --> 23:08.000 An aviator's helmet, Father. 23:08.000 --> 23:09.000 Well, yes, but... 23:09.000 --> 23:14.000 See, it has ear flaps and everything. Don't you think it's the most practical type hat for me? 23:14.000 --> 23:15.000 Where did you get it? 23:15.000 --> 23:19.000 From a pilot friend of Homer's. He sort of traded it to me on trust, see? 23:19.000 --> 23:23.000 And now that I've found my straw hat, all I have to do is take it over to him. 23:23.000 --> 23:25.000 Henry, about that straw hat... 23:25.000 --> 23:27.000 Boy, am I lucky he takes six and a half. 23:27.000 --> 23:30.000 Yes, well, the hat is now size seven and a half. 23:30.000 --> 23:32.000 What? Well, how can that be? 23:32.000 --> 23:36.000 Never mind, it is. You just have to return that helmet to your pilot. 23:36.000 --> 23:39.000 Return? Oh, no, Father. 23:39.000 --> 23:41.000 Henry, let me have a look at you. 23:41.000 --> 23:42.000 You, Mary! 23:42.000 --> 23:43.000 In the living room, Alice. 23:43.000 --> 23:44.000 Oh, boy. 23:44.000 --> 23:46.000 Listen, Mother, I can explain everything. 23:46.000 --> 23:49.000 Henry, you can explain later. First, I have something to show you all. 23:49.000 --> 23:50.000 What is it, Mother? 23:50.000 --> 23:54.000 Well, while I was waiting for Henry down at the Emporium, I bought... 23:54.000 --> 23:57.000 Here I am, everybody. How do you like me? 23:57.000 --> 23:58.000 Mother! 23:58.000 --> 23:59.000 Alice! 23:59.000 --> 24:01.000 Mother, gee whiz, what is it? 24:01.000 --> 24:02.000 Why, dear, it's a hat. 24:02.000 --> 24:04.000 A hat? 24:04.000 --> 24:05.000 I don't believe it. 24:05.000 --> 24:09.000 Mother, a brace of pheasants? Certainly, Mary. 24:09.000 --> 24:15.000 Alice, you will march down to the Emporium first thing in the morning and return that...that hat, Father. 24:15.000 --> 24:18.000 Return it? But, Sam! 24:30.000 --> 24:31.000 Say, Henry. 24:31.000 --> 24:32.000 What, Homer? 24:32.000 --> 24:36.000 At dinner tomorrow night, do you suppose we should tell your mother I'm on a very special diet? 24:36.000 --> 24:37.000 Gee whiz, you are? 24:37.000 --> 24:39.000 Sure, because I'm anemic. 24:39.000 --> 24:40.000 You are? 24:40.000 --> 24:41.000 Gee, Homer, that's tough. 24:41.000 --> 24:46.000 Sure. To build up my strength, I have to have second helpings of everything. 24:46.000 --> 24:52.000 Well, second helpings is what everybody asks for when there's Jell-O Tapioca Pudding for dessert. 24:52.000 --> 24:57.000 Yes, Jell-O Tapioca Pudding, newest members of the famous Jell-O Pudding family. 24:57.000 --> 25:00.000 And they're a miracle of goodness, a marvel of speed. 25:00.000 --> 25:06.000 There's Jell-O Vanilla Tapioca, Jell-O Chocolate Tapioca, and Jell-O Orange Coconut Tapioca. 25:06.000 --> 25:11.000 All three are luscious, light, and delicate, gloriously rich and creamy. 25:11.000 --> 25:13.000 And you know that name Jell-O is a trademark. 25:13.000 --> 25:18.000 It's the property of General Foods, and it tells you that you're getting a genuine Jell-O product. 25:18.000 --> 25:21.000 Ask your grocer for Jell-O Tapioca Pudding. 25:21.000 --> 25:26.000 And while you're about it, better get three packages so you'll have plenty for the weekend. 25:26.000 --> 25:30.000 That's Jell-O Tapioca Pudding. 25:30.000 --> 25:34.000 Here's hoping you'll be in your living room in ours next week at the same time. 25:34.000 --> 25:37.000 Good night, folks. 25:37.000 --> 25:47.000 And this is Dan Seymour in New York saying the Aldridge family is brought to you by the Jell-O family. 25:47.000 --> 25:53.000 For desserts that are delicious, boy, believe me, you should know. 25:53.000 --> 25:59.000 They are made by famous J-E-L-L-O. 25:59.000 --> 26:13.000 Listen again next Thursday, same time, same station, for another sparkling half hour with the Aldridge family. 26:13.000 --> 26:18.000 This is NBC, the national broadcasting company. 26:18.000 --> 26:23.000 Thank you.