WEBVTT 00:00.000 --> 00:06.000 Well, sir, it's early evening as we enter the small house halfway up on the next block now, 00:06.000 --> 00:09.000 and here in the living room we find Mr. and Mrs. Victor Goop. 00:09.000 --> 00:14.000 Vic is stretched at full length on the Davenport, gazing sleepily at a letter he's holding in his hand. 00:14.000 --> 00:17.000 Said occupies the easy chair, ostensibly donning socks. 00:17.000 --> 00:22.000 Actually, however, she's watching her husband with hostile eyes, and at last she says, 00:22.000 --> 00:25.000 You're just doing that to be mean. 00:25.000 --> 00:26.000 Huh? 00:26.000 --> 00:30.000 You've been reading the first page of that letter now for fifteen minutes. 00:30.000 --> 00:31.000 Really? 00:31.000 --> 00:33.000 More than fifteen minutes. 00:33.000 --> 00:36.000 I like to savor Bess's letters. 00:36.000 --> 00:40.000 I like to nibble at them slowly and taste the full sweetness. 00:40.000 --> 00:43.000 I'm not the one to gulp down cream. 00:43.000 --> 00:46.000 I take dainty little mouthfuls and extract the rich cream. 00:46.000 --> 00:48.000 I'm just gonna tell Bess. 00:48.000 --> 00:51.000 She boasts and brags and almost falls over backwards, 00:51.000 --> 00:55.000 telling Carberry people about her wonderful big brother-in-law. 00:55.000 --> 00:58.000 There's some grave misunderstanding here. 00:58.000 --> 01:00.000 I'm at a complete loss to understand. 01:00.000 --> 01:01.000 I'll say. 01:01.000 --> 01:04.000 I told you when you come home from the office this afternoon, 01:04.000 --> 01:06.000 I'd received a letter from Bess. 01:06.000 --> 01:10.000 You never asked to see it or volunteered to lift your little finger. 01:10.000 --> 01:13.000 At the supper table, I mentioned it again. 01:13.000 --> 01:16.000 Finally, I had to force you to take the letter. 01:16.000 --> 01:18.000 I'm reading the half-wit letter. 01:18.000 --> 01:20.000 Half-wit letter is right. 01:20.000 --> 01:22.000 I don't know what you're complaining about. 01:22.000 --> 01:25.000 Twenty minutes have gone past since you laid down there 01:25.000 --> 01:27.000 and you're still on the first page. 01:27.000 --> 01:28.000 I struck a snag. 01:28.000 --> 01:29.000 What? 01:29.000 --> 01:32.000 Bess is talking about something down there at the bottom here 01:32.000 --> 01:33.000 I can't make out. 01:33.000 --> 01:35.000 Want me to read it to you? 01:35.000 --> 01:36.000 Yeah. 01:36.000 --> 01:38.000 Actually, Vic, I'd be ashamed. 01:38.000 --> 01:40.000 Here, catch. 01:40.000 --> 01:42.000 Don't you dare throw that. 01:42.000 --> 01:44.000 I'll toss it in your lap. 01:44.000 --> 01:45.000 No, you won't. 01:45.000 --> 01:47.000 I suppose Bess would be mortally insolent 01:47.000 --> 01:49.000 if I tossed a precious letter across the table. 01:49.000 --> 01:51.000 Lay still. I'll get up and come over. 01:51.000 --> 01:54.000 Her eyes light up when she tells Carberry people 01:54.000 --> 01:57.000 about her magnificent brother-in-law. 01:57.000 --> 02:00.000 He's got this wonderful office, you'll say. 02:00.000 --> 02:02.000 He's got his own private telephone 02:02.000 --> 02:05.000 and special young lady to operate the typewriter 02:05.000 --> 02:09.000 and wears a clean white shirt to work every day of his life. 02:09.000 --> 02:11.000 Here's the letter. 02:11.000 --> 02:13.000 How far down have you read? 02:13.000 --> 02:15.000 Oh, I'm down about the middle. 02:15.000 --> 02:17.000 What's she talking about? 02:17.000 --> 02:18.000 What's who talking about? 02:18.000 --> 02:20.000 Bess. 02:20.000 --> 02:22.000 I expect I'm pretty dull this evening, but I don't... 02:22.000 --> 02:25.000 Bess talking about it, the place you quit reading. 02:25.000 --> 02:27.000 I want to know where to begin. 02:27.000 --> 02:30.000 Oh, just begin any old place. 02:30.000 --> 02:32.000 Vic, I'd be ashamed. 02:32.000 --> 02:35.000 I would. I certainly would. 02:35.000 --> 02:39.000 Kiddo, do we have to go through this rigmarole every time? 02:39.000 --> 02:40.000 Whose fault is it? 02:40.000 --> 02:42.000 I don't know. 02:42.000 --> 02:45.000 All I know is stark tragedy stalks in our home whenever the mailman... 02:45.000 --> 02:47.000 Where'd you leave off, here? 02:47.000 --> 02:49.000 Where'd you leave off reading? 02:49.000 --> 02:52.000 I used Walter's kneecap. 02:52.000 --> 02:55.000 You were reading about Walter's kneecap when I interrupted you? 02:55.000 --> 02:56.000 Yes. 02:56.000 --> 02:58.000 That's only the second sentence. 02:58.000 --> 02:59.000 Is it? 02:59.000 --> 03:01.000 You've been laying there on the davenport, 03:01.000 --> 03:05.000 20 minutes reading Bess' letter, and only got to the second sentence. 03:05.000 --> 03:07.000 Oh, I digest what I read. 03:07.000 --> 03:09.000 I weigh every word. 03:09.000 --> 03:12.000 In order to extract the pure gold, I take my time. 03:12.000 --> 03:14.000 I don't know. I just don't know. 03:14.000 --> 03:18.000 Oh, Kiddo, don't you think this is just a bit ridiculous? 03:18.000 --> 03:19.000 I do. 03:19.000 --> 03:21.000 If you pause a moment and reflect it, 03:21.000 --> 03:24.000 all this bitterness and grief revolves around the fact... 03:24.000 --> 03:28.000 Exactly. Exactly. 03:28.000 --> 03:30.000 At least you can listen. 03:30.000 --> 03:31.000 Sure. 03:31.000 --> 03:33.000 Dear sister-in-law, 03:33.000 --> 03:36.000 thought I would write and see how you are feeling. 03:36.000 --> 03:40.000 We are fine, and Walter's kneecap seems to have let up 03:40.000 --> 03:43.000 definitely on the twinges. Knock wood. 03:45.000 --> 03:47.000 Poor Bess. 03:47.000 --> 03:50.000 Poor Bess. 03:50.000 --> 03:53.000 Walter's kneecap seems to have let up 03:53.000 --> 03:56.000 definitely on the twinges. Knock wood. 03:56.000 --> 03:59.000 All right, pound on the arm of the davenport again. 03:59.000 --> 04:02.000 I'm not opening my trap. 04:02.000 --> 04:04.000 How is Vic? 04:04.000 --> 04:06.000 How is Vic? 04:06.000 --> 04:08.000 Mm-hmm. 04:08.000 --> 04:10.000 How is Vic? 04:10.000 --> 04:12.000 Should you say that three times? 04:12.000 --> 04:14.000 No, just once. 04:14.000 --> 04:17.000 But it's here. How is Vic? 04:17.000 --> 04:19.000 Is it underlined or something? 04:19.000 --> 04:22.000 No, just a plain, simple statement, 04:22.000 --> 04:25.000 sweet and straight to the point, like Bessie herself. 04:25.000 --> 04:27.000 How is Vic? 04:27.000 --> 04:30.000 We have had just oodles of rain here in Carberry. 04:30.000 --> 04:34.000 Last night it come down in bucket pulls. Ha-ha. 04:34.000 --> 04:39.000 I wonder what Bess would say if she knew. 04:39.000 --> 04:43.000 Every once in a while I get too coughed with when I'm talking. 04:43.000 --> 04:47.000 I get too coughed with when I lay flat on my back on the davenport. 04:47.000 --> 04:49.000 I wonder what makes that. 04:49.000 --> 04:52.000 I suppose Rush is still telling his playmates 04:52.000 --> 04:56.000 about the grand times he had when he visited his Aunt Bess and Uncle Walter. 04:56.000 --> 04:59.000 It was so lovely having you people. 04:59.000 --> 05:02.000 Vic looked so nice. 05:02.000 --> 05:03.000 Ha-ha. 05:03.000 --> 05:06.000 It was so lovely having you people. 05:06.000 --> 05:08.000 Vic looked so nice. 05:08.000 --> 05:10.000 Should you have got that down twice? 05:10.000 --> 05:12.000 No, only once. 05:12.000 --> 05:14.000 Vic looked so nice. 05:14.000 --> 05:15.000 Ah. 05:15.000 --> 05:19.000 Youncy has started to memorize a new piece on the piano 05:19.000 --> 05:22.000 that's every bit as difficult as the Rora Borealis, 05:22.000 --> 05:24.000 Elegy and Gallop, 05:24.000 --> 05:27.000 where she stomps on the loud pedal with both feet 05:27.000 --> 05:31.000 and scrapes her fingernail down along the white key. 05:31.000 --> 05:35.000 The new piece is called Little Red Skin Comanche, 05:35.000 --> 05:37.000 Sweetheart of Mine, 05:37.000 --> 05:41.000 and in the middle of it, Youncy hammers on the top of the piano with her fist 05:41.000 --> 05:44.000 and also lets out an Indian war hoot. 05:44.000 --> 05:49.000 Her music teacher, Miss Nell, played it over for us Friday afternoon, 05:49.000 --> 05:52.000 and Walter was upstairs and come running down, 05:52.000 --> 05:55.000 white as a sheet, he was so scared. 05:55.000 --> 05:57.000 Ha-ha. 05:59.000 --> 06:01.000 Isn't that a funny thing? 06:01.000 --> 06:02.000 Yeah. 06:02.000 --> 06:05.000 Walter heard all this commotion of hammering with fists 06:05.000 --> 06:08.000 on top of the piano and Indian war hoops 06:08.000 --> 06:10.000 and wondered what on earth was going on. 06:10.000 --> 06:11.000 Ha-ha. 06:11.000 --> 06:13.000 Don't even make you smile. 06:13.000 --> 06:15.000 Oh, I won't. 06:15.000 --> 06:17.000 Poor Bess. 06:17.000 --> 06:21.000 No matter what I do or say, I'm a fathead. 06:21.000 --> 06:26.000 Did you make that little dress yet you bought material for, mate? 06:26.000 --> 06:28.000 I bet it is just awful pretty. 06:28.000 --> 06:31.000 I bought shoes last week. 06:31.000 --> 06:35.000 They pinched my feet and I let Mrs. Goffer cross the street, 06:35.000 --> 06:38.000 wear them to Freeport to break them in. Ha-ha. 06:38.000 --> 06:40.000 Ha-ha. 06:40.000 --> 06:42.000 What's so funny? 06:42.000 --> 06:45.000 Isn't it supposed to be funny? 06:45.000 --> 06:46.000 Oh. 06:46.000 --> 06:48.000 She's got a ha-ha tacked on. 06:48.000 --> 06:50.000 Sure. 06:50.000 --> 06:53.000 Mr. Gargleson, grandfather to Miss Whiting, 06:53.000 --> 06:55.000 you met at Mrs. Phillips' house, 06:55.000 --> 06:57.000 fell out of the porch swing yesterday 06:57.000 --> 07:01.000 and had to have seven stitches taken in the calf of his leg. 07:01.000 --> 07:03.000 Ha-ha. 07:03.000 --> 07:05.000 Ha-ha. 07:05.000 --> 07:08.000 She wrote that ha-ha in there by mistake. 07:08.000 --> 07:11.000 Mr. Gargleson's a perfectly lovely old gentleman. 07:11.000 --> 07:14.000 Bess wouldn't say ha-ha about him getting hurt. 07:14.000 --> 07:15.000 What? 07:15.000 --> 07:17.000 I never said anything. 07:17.000 --> 07:20.000 I expect Vic. 07:20.000 --> 07:21.000 Vic? 07:21.000 --> 07:24.000 See how many times she mentions you. 07:24.000 --> 07:26.000 Oh, yes. 07:26.000 --> 07:29.000 My sister's man holds a wonderful position there in the kitchen 07:29.000 --> 07:31.000 where he's the head of his lodge 07:31.000 --> 07:35.000 and takes trips to Chicago and every place else. 07:35.000 --> 07:37.000 That's the way she talks about you. 07:37.000 --> 07:38.000 Hmm. 07:38.000 --> 07:42.000 I expect Vic is having dandy times at his office these days. 07:42.000 --> 07:44.000 What do you mean, dandy times? 07:44.000 --> 07:45.000 Dandy times? 07:45.000 --> 07:48.000 Does she think I go to the office to play the guitar 07:48.000 --> 07:50.000 and eat white grapes? 07:50.000 --> 07:53.000 I don't go to the office to have dandy times. 07:53.000 --> 07:55.000 I go to the office to work. 07:55.000 --> 07:59.000 Bess is a mean, cruel girl to say a thing like that. 07:59.000 --> 08:02.000 If I was you, I'd write back and scold her for it. 08:02.000 --> 08:04.000 No, old witch, shucks. 08:04.000 --> 08:07.000 I don't think she really means any harm. 08:07.000 --> 08:08.000 Hmm. 08:08.000 --> 08:12.000 I expect Vic is having dandy times at his office these days. 08:12.000 --> 08:14.000 Well, he certainly deserves it. 08:14.000 --> 08:15.000 Yeah. 08:15.000 --> 08:17.000 Yes? 08:17.000 --> 08:18.000 Nothing. 08:18.000 --> 08:21.000 By the way, mate, you can tell him our neighbor, 08:21.000 --> 08:24.000 Miss Frostgum, passed a cute little compliment on him. 08:24.000 --> 08:27.000 Your sister's husband, Miss Haffer, she says, 08:27.000 --> 08:30.000 was quite distinguished-looking. Ha-ha. 08:30.000 --> 08:32.000 Remember Miss Frostgum? 08:32.000 --> 08:35.000 She was the lady rushed into the kitchen that Sunday morning 08:35.000 --> 08:37.000 when we were there and borrowed the cup of butter. 08:37.000 --> 08:39.000 Wore the last excited shoes, remember, 08:39.000 --> 08:41.000 all in white and gold teeth. 08:41.000 --> 08:42.000 Hmm. 08:42.000 --> 08:45.000 Speaking of Miss Frostgum, she and Mrs. 08:45.000 --> 08:48.000 Richard, it looks like, Richard Fitcher. 08:48.000 --> 08:52.000 Speaking of Miss Frostgum, she and Miss Fitcher went to 08:52.000 --> 08:56.000 some place, Newton, I guess. 08:56.000 --> 08:58.000 When she gets down close to the end of her letter, 08:58.000 --> 09:02.000 she tries to cram a whole bunch of stuff in a little rotten bit of space. 09:02.000 --> 09:06.000 Speaking of Miss Frostgum, she and Miss Fitcher went to Newton 09:06.000 --> 09:09.000 to buy, hmm, something. 09:09.000 --> 09:12.000 Can't make out that word at all. 09:12.000 --> 09:16.000 I expect Rush is something, something, something, something, 09:16.000 --> 09:21.000 rather something, quite a good deal here lately. Ha-ha. 09:21.000 --> 09:24.000 Something, something, something, something, something, something, 09:24.000 --> 09:26.000 I know you'll agree. 09:26.000 --> 09:29.000 Gollies, nobody could make this out. 09:29.000 --> 09:31.000 Well, I guess I will. 09:31.000 --> 09:33.000 Something, something, something, something, something, 09:33.000 --> 09:35.000 something, rather when you can. 09:35.000 --> 09:38.000 Something, something, something, something, something, 09:38.000 --> 09:42.000 something, something, something, something, something, 09:42.000 --> 09:46.000 love to all your sister best. 09:46.000 --> 09:49.000 Nice little letter, hmm? 09:49.000 --> 09:53.000 And not such a terrible ordeal to have to listen to either, hmm? 09:53.000 --> 09:55.000 Huh? 09:55.000 --> 09:58.000 Vic? 09:58.000 --> 10:01.000 Vic, are you asleep? 10:01.000 --> 10:05.000 Vic, are you asleep? 10:05.000 --> 10:09.000 You are asleep, you are asleep. 10:09.000 --> 10:11.000 Huh? 10:11.000 --> 10:13.000 Vic, how could you do it?