146 WITH NO REGRETS

Life has not been easy for Jawahar and suffering
and sacrifice have left their mark on him as also on
so many others who have taken the same path.

There are people who find fault with Jawahar
and criticise him but they just do not understand
him nor can they fathom his ways. He is human
like the rest of us and has weaknesses that most
human beings have. Only where the majority suc-
cumb he does not, hence his greatness. If India
idolizes Jawahar to-day it is not for his virtues and
strength and courage alone but for his very hu-
man qualities. He neither considers himself a hero
nor a martyr, but just one who has been privileged
to serve his country in her hour of need and who
will continue to do so till the very end. He does not
consider going to jail a great sacrifice on one's part
or something to make a fuss about though almost
half his life has been spent in jail. It is just some-
thing inevitable when we are fighting for our free-
dom against alieix. domination. He once wrote to
me from jail "Going to jail is a trivial matter in
the world of today, which is being shaken to its
foundation. As a mere routine, I think it has some
value and does one good but that value is not very
great unless there is an inner urge to do it. If an
inner urge is present, little else matters for that
represents something vital."

And yet going to jail again and yet again is
no easy matter. Nor is jail exactly a bed of roses
where one would like to relax every now and then.
Some people think that those who have been in
prison many times, get used to the idea and do not
mind it. A few months in jail would soon clear up
this misconception. Physical discomforts there
always are and one expects them when one goes to
prison. It is the mental adjustment that is difficult
when one has to cope with the daily petty tyrannies
of jail life.