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Here's to the Garden of Eden Where Adam was always a-weedin'
Till Eve by mistake
Got bit by a snake Who on the ripe pippins was feedin*.
Then a longing it seemed to possess her. For clothing sufficient to dress her.
And ever since then
It's been up to the men To pay for her dresses, — God bless her !
Wallace Irwin in ''Toasts and Tributes"' By courleiyr o( Rohde 6c Haskins
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ADAMS SOISLS
Portrayed by
A' G ^ LearrLcd.
Compiled by
Leila - Sprague^ - Learned
Copyright, 1906, by
A. G. LEARNED, New York
First Edition, September, 1906. 5000
INTRODUCTION
WRITTEN ESPECIALLY FOR ADAM'S SONS BY
WALLACE IRWIN
The Son of Adam, doomed to stray
From Eden's pleasant sod, Still wanders in a dreamy way
Throughout the Land of Nod.
He goes about avoiding trees
And woman's wiles serene, He takes to cover when he sees
The species serpentine.
Yet woman peeps from shades and nooks.
Or plain or picturesque ; He finds her in his games, his books,
He finds her at his desk.
Until, poor man! he can't forego
The yearning for a wife — • Love makes a Purgatorio
Of Adam Junior's life.
In vain he flams his brain with fib: His heart will not believe.
He knows he'd give a dozen rib To reconstruct his Eve.
But ah, the beauties that entice Are just beyond his reach.
He swears the Fruit of Paradise Is verily a Peach.
Till happy day! in bridal gown They take the golden train
For Eden, where they settle down And start to raising Cciin.
PREFACE
It was fitting that the quotations for the vol- ume " Eve's Daughters" should have been selected by a "Mere Man." Perhaps some people think that all the good and clever sayings have been about the fair daughters of Eve, and that women are the most interesting subject, not only to men, but to themselves.
Now the compiler of these sentiments about "Adam's Sons," being fittingly a woman, has ob- served that men are an all-sufficient topic of inter- est to themselves, and she confesses that men are the chief objects of most women's contemplation.
Therefore she has labored conscientiously in culling out the best things from the mauiifold epigrams on this fascinating theme. To what ex- tent she has chosen wisely, she leaves the reader to decide, believing that at least there is sufficient variety to suit all tastes.
The blessed sons of Adcim must not condenm the book nor meJign an innocent compiler, because so many of the cynicisms are uncomplimentcuy to their vanity. Let them remember that writers of all time have had to say bold, bitter things of us, to get an audience, and that simple words of praise would lack the spice necesseuy to hold our interest.
However, the compiler is confident that the illustrations by Mr. A. G. Learned will furnish suf- ficient reason for the book's being, since the public received so kindly the former volume ("Eve's Daughters"), also illustrated by him.
L. S. L.
NOTE
" I am but a gatherer and disposer of other men's stuff,'* and would therefore express my thanks for the courtesies ex- tended by the authors and publishers holding copyrights of the following books : —
Nettie Seeley Murphy's " Isn't It So? " and "What Of It?"published byj. B. Lippincott & Co. ; Herman Lee Meader's " Reflections of the Morning After," by H. M. Caldwell & Co. ; Jennie Day Haines's "Sovereign Woman Versus Mere Man," by Paul Elder & Co. ; George Horace Lorimer's " Old Gorgon Graham's Letters to His Son," by Doubleday, Page & Co. ; Minna Thomas Antrim's "Mazes, Phazes, and Crazes of Love," by George W. Jacobs & Co. ; George Ade's " Break- ing into Society," by Harper and Brothers; "The Foolish Dictionary" and "The Foolish Almanac," by John W. Luce & Co. ; " The Matrimonial Primer," by Paul Elder & Co. ; "Toasts and Tributes," by Rohde and Haskins ; and Lisle de Vaux Matthewman's " Business," by J. B. Lippincott & Co. ; and an unpublished manuscript " Mem," used by courtesy of Caroline S. Rapalje.
I regret not being able to give full credit for every thought, and beg to be forgiven by any author who finds himself quoted anonymously.
THE COMPILER.
ADAM'S SONS
(^
If Adam had had before his eyes the warning example which he set, it is doubtful if he would have been as easily fooled as are his sons.
Lisle de Vaux Matthewman.
To prove his superiority, Adam grandly accepted
the apple Eve offered. To prove his inferiority,
he laid the blame all on her when it gave him the
stomach-ache.
Nettie Seeley Murphy.
It may have taken a hundred centuries of evolu- tion to change a monkey into a man, but it takes only a few minutes and a pint of whiskey to change
a man into a monkey.
Herman Lee Meader.
Adam's sons rule the world. Eve's daughters rule Adam's sons ! Here's to their good health ! May God bless them all !
Hon. Daniel Nash Morgan.
Mankind's an uncouth squad.
Anon.
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ADAM'S SONS
Distrust that man who tells you to distrust; He takes the measure of his own small soul. And thinks the world no larger.
Ella Wheeler 'Wilcox.
TTiese three will never see hell: He who is purified by poverty, he who is hcirassed by impor- tunate creditors, euid he who is plagued wath a ter- magant wife.
The Talmud.
Reputation is a bubble which a man bursts when
he tries to blow it for himself.
Elbert Hubbard.
A stupid mam is a fool who never speaks ; in this
he is more endurable than the fool who speaks.
He who speaks little has the advemtage; the
presumption is that he possesses wit.
Anon.
The professional humorist has no use for an edi- tor who can't take a joke.
Anon.
30 tT)dLQv fi)illioi)3 of f^ce5,t9ti43t)oul^ be pope sJilre.
ADAM'S SONS
Gods! How the son degenerates from the sire.
Pope.
It by no means follows that we stfe not fit for
society because soirees are tedious, and because
the soiree finds us tedious.
Emerson.
TTie high hat is deemed inharmonious for men of low salaries.
Foolish Almanac.
A fellow may know everything that's happened since the Lord started the bzJl rolling, and not be able to do anything to keep it from stopping.
George Horace Lorimer.
I would pardon his dulness eind even his ig- norance, for one might be the fault of his nature, and the other of his education; but his self-suffi- ciency is his own fault, and that I will not and can- not peurdon.
Maria Edgeworth. 13
ADAM'S SONS
All books 2Uicl no business makes Jack a jack-in- the-box with springs and wheels in his head; all play and no work makes Jack a jackass with bosh in his skull; the right prescription for him is play when he really needs it, and work whether he needs it or not ; for that dose makes Jack a cracker- jack.
George Horace JLorimer.
He might be a very clever man by nature for aught I know, but he leud so many books upon his head that his brains could not move.
Robert HalJ.
' Tis my vocation, Hal, 'tis no sin for a man to labor in his vocation.
King Henry IV.
That fellow seems to me to possess but one idea,
and that is a wrong one.
Johnson. 14
ADAM'S SONS
A bachelor is an unattached mcin which any lady may stick, stick to, or get stuck on.
From the Foolish Dictionary.
An unmarried man is but hcilf of a perfect being
and it requires the other half to make things right,
and it cannot be expected that in this imperfect
state he can keep the straight path of rectitude any
more than a boat with one oar or a bird with one
wing can keep a straight course.
Anon.
In one sense men are not fickle except in trifles. They change their clothes, their language, and their habits, but they cJways preserve their evil in- clinations, are firm and constant in wTong-doing,
and in their indifference to virtue.
L,a Bru^ere.
The happy married man dies in good style at home, surrounded by his weeping wife and children.
The old bachelor don't die at all — he sort of rots away, like a poll5rwog's tail.
ADAM'S SONS
There is something harder to bear than re- verses of fortune ; it is the ingratitude of man.
Napoleon.
A weak man is sort of an intermediate being
between the two sexes.
Anon.
The whole creation is a mystery and particularly that of man.
Sir Thomas Browne.
No sadder proof can be given by a man of his own littleness than disbelief in great men.
Carlyle.
Unless above himself he can erect himself, how
poor a thing is man.
Daniel.
No man can be considered great who does not
move until he is pushed.
Hubbard.
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ADAM'S SONS
The man who dares traduce because he can with safety to himself is not a man.
Co-wper.
The man who pauses on the paths of treason halts on a quicksand, — the first step engulfs him.
Hill's Henryl V.
A man is as good as he has to be, — a woman
as bad as she dares.
All Baba.
I call him poor because he was discontented and envious. It was in vain that his apples were the largest for miles around, if his neighbor's vines were the most productive by a single bunch ; it was in vain that his laimbs were fat and thriving, if some one else's sheep bore twins; so, instead of enjoying his own prosperity, and being glad when his neigh- bors prospered too, he would sit grumbling cind be- moaning himself as if every other man's riches were his poverty.
19
Christina G. Rossetti.
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I Jtelii.
ADAM'S SONS
A man's standcurds of measurement are like his cigaurs, one kind for himself amd smother for his friends.
Matthewirinan.
A man whose blood is very snow broth.
Shakespeare.
Any man may be in good spirits and good tem- per when he is well dressed. There ain't much credit in that. If I was very ragged and very jolly, then I should feel I had gained a point.
Charles Dickens.
Politicians are men who volunteer the task of governing us for a consideration.
Fra Elbertus.
The best portion of a good man's life: — His
little, nameless, unremembered acts of kindness and
of love.
Words vrorth.
So over violent, or over civil.
That every man with him wets God or Devil.
Dry den. 20
ADAM'S SONS
A chump — ciny one whose opinions differ radi- cally from ours.
Gideon Wurdz.
Many a man is uniformed who ought to be
chloroformed.
Nettie Seeley Murphy.
He is an unwise man who builds on a bluff and doesn't keep the bluff up.
L. de V. Matthewman.
If you selected your wife because of her style, don't growl when the styles change.
Matrimonial Primer.
Wise men often avoid the world so that they may not be wearied by it.
La Bruyere.
The man who is always proclauming that he is in the right is intolerable ; the man who admits he has been wrong is charming.
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ADAM'S SONS
Maury ! no faith ; husbands are like lots in
The lottery. You may draw forty blanks
Before you find one that has any prize
In him ; a husband generally is a
Careless, domineering thing, that grows like
Cored ; which, as long as it is under water,
Is soft and tender; but as soon
As it has got its branch above the waves
Is presently hard, stiff, not to be bowed.
Marston.
And such is main — a soil which breeds
Or sweetest flowers or vilest weeds.
Bow^ring.
Some men who marry and settle down would have done the world more good had they remained single and settled up.
Prom Sovereign Woman Versus Mere Man.
Some quaint old author says, that man is too
smooth and oily a nature to climb up to heaven,
if to make him less slippery there be not added to
his composition the vinegar of maimage.
22
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ADAM
SONS
A lazy, lolling sort.
Unseen at church, at senate, or at court.
Of ever listless loit'rers, that attend
No cause, no trust, no duty, and no friend.
Pope.
Just because a man can break a bronco or win a prize fight, it's no sign he can manage a woman.
Gideon Wurdz.
The man who lives in town, and thinks he is a
gay dog, isn't a marker zJongside of the respectable
citizen from down the road.
George Ade.
Drive me, O drive me, from that traitor, man! So I might 'scape that monster, let me dwell In lions' haunts or in some tiger's den.
Man ! false man ! smiling destructive man.
Lee.
What then is man? The smallest part of nothing.
Young.
25
ADAM'S SONS
Let no meui trust the first f aJse step Of guilt, it hangs upon a precipice, Whose steep descent in last perdition ends.
Young,
The man who pauses on his honesty
Wants little of the villain.
Martyn.
One may take it that no man is sent to the world a ready-made scoundrel. It eJl depends upon the circumstances of life. No one is safe right up to the end, and events may combine to make the best of us into that thing which the world calls a villciin.
Henry Seton Merriman.
When the gay boy, with a change of striped shirts and a golf club, gets back from a summer outing at a man-forsaken hotel, and tries to repeat his triumphs in the city, he gets the same sort of jolt as the fat fellow does, who steps on a banana peel.
Herman Lee Meader. 26
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ADAM'S SONS
Many a man rides in an automobile who would appear to better advantage on a water-wagon.
Foolish Almanac.
Read history, and learn how conunonplace men
have often had greatness thrust upon them and met
the issue.
Hubbard.
Man is but a reed, the weakest in nature, but
he is a thinking reed.
Pascal.
Man in sooth is a marvellous, vain, fickle, and
unstable subject.
Montaigue.
Nobody loves life like an old man. '^^
Sophocles.
Sigh no more, ladies, sigh no more.
Men were deceivers ever, —
One foot in sea and one on shore, /
To one thing constant never. ^'-. . i\(
Shakespeare. ^.^
^
ADAM'S SONS
An athlete is a dignified bunch of muscles, un- able to split the wood or sift the ashes.
Gideon "Wurdz.
Small men are provincial, mediocre men are cos- mopolitan, but great souls are universal.
Hubbard.
A lot of men who get one dollar's worth of food for a five-dollar bill down-town, expect their wives to get five dollars' worth of food for a one-dollar bill at the comer grocery, and to save the change to- ward a pair of diamond earrings. These fellows would plant a tin can, and kick because they didn't get a case of tomatoes.
Old Gorgon Graham's Letters to His Son^
ere is no animal so strange as man.
Carlyle.
What a strange thing is man, and what a stranger
is woman !
Byron. 28
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ADAM'S SONS
If heaven had looked upon riches to be a val- uable thing, it w^ould not have given them to such a scoundrel.
Swrift.
A vv^eak mcin in office, like a squirrel in a cage, is laboring eternally, but to no purpose, and in con- stant motion without getting on a jot ; like a turnstile, he is in everybody's way, but stops nobody; he talks a great deal, but says very little ; looks into everything, but sees into nothing; and has a hundred irons in the fire, but very few of them are hot, and with those few that are he only bums his fingers.
Charles Caleb Colton.
My saJad days,
When I was green in judgment.
Anton^ and Cleopatra.
What a frail thing is man! 31
Shirley.
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ADAM'S SONS
Bciit your trap with some form of vanity, and there is not a son of Adam who will not nibble at the baut, if he does not swallow it whole.
Nettie Seeley Murphy.
A feishionable man is like a certjun blue flower, which, growing wild in the fields, chokes the com, spoils the crops, and takes up the place of some- thing better.
Anon.
Touch a mam's vanity, and he expeinds like a
green bay-tree. — Touch his pocket-book, and he
closes like a clam.
Nettie Seeley Murphy.
Is he the toad? he's rather like a snail; known chiefly for the house upon his back; divide the man and the house, you kill the man.
Mrs. Brow^ning's "Aurora Leigh."
I cannot talk with civet in the room, A fine puss-gentleman that's all perfume.
Cowper.
ADAM'S SONS
Man — Something that "goes first on four feet, then two feet, then three, but the more feet it goes on the weaker it be ! "
The Foolish Dictionary.
A great many men are so broad-minded that it
makes their heads flat.
Myrtle Reed.
Three things a man should not leave in another's keeping, — his wife, his wine, and his word.
Helen Woljeska.
The happiness of a married man depends upon
the people he has not married.
Oscar Wilde.
At twenty, men love women ; at forty, girls ; at fifty, themselves.
Minna Thomas Antrim.
A fellow that makes no figure in company and has a mind.
Anon. 33
ADAM'S SONS
Let him go abroad to a distant country, — to some
place where he is not known. Don't let him go
to the devil, where he is known.
Johnson.
He was the mildest mannered man That ever scuttled ship or cut a throat.
Byron.
And a\\ to leave, what with his toil he won,
To that unfeathered two-legged thing, a son.
Dry den.
A man never knows how to live until a woman
has lived with him.
Mere.
The rudest man inspired by love, is more per- suasive than the most eloquent man, if uninspired.
L,a Rochefoucauld.
He was a man of an unbounded stomach.
King Henry VIII.
He is the very pineapple of politeness.
Sheridan
34
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ADAM'S SONS
Men have made of Fortune an all-powerful god- dess, in order to be made responsible for all their
blunders.
Madame de Stael.
The less one sees and knows men, the higher
one esteems them ; for experience teaches their
real value.
Marguerite de Valoia.
Let no man think that he can devise any plaui
of extensive good unalloyed and unadulterated
v^ath evil.
Charles Caleb Colton.
I have seen men so fond of argument that they would dispute with a guide-board at the forks of a country road about the distance to the next town.
Josh Billings.
Whose little body lodged a mighty mind.
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ADAM'S SONS
Mamy a man who is worth millions is worth
nothing else.
Lisle de Vaux Matthewman.
No man is rich enough to buy back his past.
Oscar Wilde.
He who gets money before he gets wit
Will be but a short time master of it.
Anon.
A rich rogue is like a fat hog.
Who never does good till dead as a log.
Franklin.
The covetous man is one of the devil's martyrs.
Flyjoo.
The darkest day in any man's career is that wherein he fancies there's some easier way of get- ting a doUar than by squjureiy earning it.
Horace Greeley.
Machiavel says virtue and riches seldom settle on one man.
Burton.
38
ADAM'S SONS
Where lives the man that hats not tried
How mirth can into foUy glide,
And folly into sin.
Wa7ter Scott.
Some men are poor, lots of them are stupid, most of them are u^y, and all of them are conceited, but, nevertheless, they are as indispensable as bread.
Meader.
We grant, although he had much wit. He was very shy of using it.
Samuel Butler.
A poet soaring in the high reason of his fancies, With his garlamd and singing robes about him.
Milton.
From the crown of his head to the sole of his
foot he is all mirth.
Shakespeare.
1 never knew any man in my life who could not bear another's misfortune perfectly like a Christian.
Pope. 39
A ^ t^
ADAM'S SONS
The cigarette is for the trivi£j moments of life, the cigar for its fulfilments, its pleasant, comfortable retrospections, but in real distress, in the solving of questions, the fighting of difficulties, the pipe is man's eternal solace. Katherine Cecil Thurston, "The Masquerader."
Drawn by conceit from reason's plan.
How vain is that poor creature, mein !
How pleased is every paltry elf
y To prate about that thing, himself.
Churchill.
A man's a fool
If not instructed in a woman's school.
Beaumont fif» Fletcher.
All mankind is one of these two cowards ; Either to wish to die
When he should live, or live when he should die.
Sir Robert Howard. 40
ADAM'S SONS
A maui without a few evil intentions is like lingerie without lace — uninteresting.
Herman L,ee Meader.
The man who is always having his feelings hurt is about as pleasing a companion as a p>ebble in a shoe.
The Philistine.
God made him, and, therefore, let him pass for a man.
Shakespeare.
Some men don't know how much they are worth ; most don't know how little.
Lisle de Vaux Matthewman.
Love to a woman is a complete romance ; to a man it is a collection of short stories.
George Ade.
Man is only a protozoan wiggling through a fluid called atmosphere ; he is here but a day and knows neither where he came from nor where he is going.
Fra Elbertus. 43
ADAM'S SONS
A vile conceit in pompous words expressed,
Is like a clown in regal purple dressed.
Pope.
Whom do we dub a gentleman? The knave,
the fool, the brute —
If they but own full tithe of gold and wear a
courtly suit
Eliza Cook.
The man of power is one who WTings success out
of the strong heart of defeat.
Elbert Hubbard.
It is the discreet man, not the witty, not the
learned, nor the brave, who guides conversation
and gives measures to society.
Addison.
Man is the sum total of all the animals.
Prof. Oken.
It is dangerous to wake a lion from his sleep; terrific are the fangs of a tiger; but worse than both united is man in his delirious fury.
Schiller.
44
ADAM'S SONS
Many men enjoy a good reputation by giving
publicly and stealing privately.
Anon.
I've usually found that these quick, glad borrowers are slow^, sad payers, Jind when a fellow tells you that it hurts him to have to borrow, you can bet that the thought of having to pay is going to tie him up into a bow-knot of pain.
George Horace JLorimer.
Since Seraphim cannot abide here, it behooves
all women to give themks for decently auniable
men.
Minna Thomas Antrim.
Many have lived on a pedestal who will never
have a statue when dead,
Beranger.
A man's honesty is in proportion to his opportun- ities, amd a womam's virtue in proportion to her cheirms. Nettie Seeley Murphy. 45
//
^
ADAM'S SONS
Males are divided into two classes, men and cads; and some men are cads.
Foolish Almanac.
What is a man,
If his chief good and market of his time
Be but to sleep and feed? A beast — no more.
Shakespeare.
The neighbors asked what he would make his son ; " I'll make a man of him," the old man said, " And for the rest, just what he likes himself."
George MacDonald.
Better a man without riches than riches without a man.
Tennyson.
I've known a man who never came of age at all. Though he was ninety at his death.
I've known a man Who came of age a baby in his bassinette.
And was a man before he spoke a syllable.
Mortimer Collins. 46
ADAM'S SONS
Man is judged by his deeds, — woman by her misdeeds.
/ ' Ik '■"I
Foolish Almanac.
Three-fifths 6f him was genuine, two-fifths sheer
fudge.
Lowell.
Man ! an heir of glory ! a frml child of dust ! Helpless immortal ! insect infinite ! a worm ! a god !
Dr. E. Young.
Man passes away; his name perishes from record
and recollection ; his history is as a tale that is told ;
and his very monument becomes a ruin.
Irving.
Many men resemble glass, smooth, poKshed, and dull, so long as unbroken, then sharp — every splinter pricks.
Men have died from time to time, and worms
have eaten them — but not for love.
Shakespeare. 49
ADAM'S SONS
Happy the man, who, innocent, Grieves not at ills he can't prevent ; His skiff does with the current glide, Not puffing, pulled against the tide.
Green.
How cold he hearkens to some bankrupt's woe. Nods his wise head, and cries, " I told you so."
Sprague.
There is a lust in man no charm can tame,
Of loudly publishing his neighbor's shaune.
Harvey.
A man may give his wife a piece of his mind if he chooses, but he shouldn't break the peace.
G. D. Prentice.
The extreme penalty for bigamy is the plurality
of mothers-in-law which it necessitates.
Nellie Gillmore.
He is not only dull himself, but the cause of dulness in others.
Johnson. 50
ADAM'S SONS
No one is a real man after he has lost out all the boy.
.. ^n
Henry Ward Beecher.
I am so soon done for,
I wonder what I was begun for.
Anon.
Nature intended you for a man, but the work was botched in the doing.
Anon.
A Johnny is one who pays $50 for a bunch of
violets to give to a girl he wouldn't speak to if
she weren't an actress.
Frank E. Aiken.
What a great deal of time and ease that man gains who lets his neighbor's words, thoughts, and ,7/,y/ behavior alone, confines his inspections to himself, .'''^ and takes care that his own actions are honest and righteous.
Marcus Aurelius.
51
ADAM'S SONS
One of these fellows with pink tea instead of red blood in his veins, who hadn't any opinions ex- cept your opinions, until he met some one else. Preached pretty, fluffy little things, and used "eau
de Cologne" on his language.
George Horace Lorimer.
The generality of men employ the best part of
their lives to make the last part miserable.
La Bruyere.
I wish Adam had died with all his ribs in his
body!
Boucicault.
In buying horses and in taking a wife, shut your eyes tight and conunend yourself to God.
Tuscan Proverb.
There is nothing a mem of good sense dreads in
a wife so much as her having more sense than
himself.
Fielding.
52
itef)^ir)6 01) [)\n) It) p^r^licuU/^ll l)'3 1'/^ 'oQ^-
ADAM'S SONS
Some fellows never go to work for a living until
they have given everything else a fair trial.
Anon.
Most men have died without creating ; not one has died without destroying.
Alexandre Dumas.
A man in love, if sincere, is good for nothing,
despite all that has been pretended, but to make
love.
P. J. Stahl.
The absurd man is one who never changes.
Barthelemy.
Great men unknown. Old theme ! There is better still: celebrated mediocrities and celebrated fools.
From Witty, Wise, and Wicked Maxims.
An inventor is a good man laboring to obtain
wealth for others.
Charles Narre^.
ADAM'S SONS
Such and so various are the tastes of men.
Mark Akenaide.
No man is free who has not been divorced from
popular favor.
Fra Elbertus.
The man who hain't got an enemy, is really poor.
Josh Billings.
, _ , - „ „ ^ '^^ more honest a man is, the less he affects
^'^''^W^''>^^^^^^'§mrfC^^^^^ the air of a saint.
Many a man, who, before mezJ-time, would not give a sixpence for any purpose, will postprandially talk with unction of the miseries of our race, and hand over his greenbacks without grumbling.
William Mathews.
Honor the strong man, in these ages, who has shaken himself loose of shams, emd is something.
Carlyle. 56
ADAM'S SONS
Oh, I am so sick of the young men of the pres- ent day! Poor, puny things! Creatures so ab- sorbed in care about their pretty faces and small feet ; as if a man had anything to do with beauty! Charlotte Bronte's "Jane Eyre."
He builds his goodness up so high, it topples down to the other side, zind makes a sort of bad- ness.
Mrs. Brow^ning's "Aurora Leigh."
The man who, in his will, provides a penalty in case his wife memries ageiin, never had any confi- dence in her during life. He thought he owned her, body and soul. It is bad enough for a woman to be owned by a live man, but to be dictated to by a dead one, ugh!
Fra Elbertus.
Seldom he smiles, and smiles in such a sort. As if he mocked himself, and scorned his spirit That could be moved to smile at anything.
Shakespeare's "Julius Caesar." 57
ADAM'S SONS
It is the man who has not been tempted who is
proudest of his virtues.
Liisle de Vaux Matthewman.
A man with a few brains is like a dog with one
flea on him — dreadful oneazy.
Josh Billings.
Man is Creation's masterpiece. But who says so? — Man!
Gavarni.
Man comes into the world naked and bare,
He goes through the world with trouble and care.
When he dies he goes, the Lord knows where.
But if he does well here, he does well there.
Hindoo.
In men this blunder still you find. All think their little set mankind.
Hannah More.
58
'H'"
fr^en wl^o pe^int ^^lp[;)j, favll in love witl^ jorr^e bonne et br^dsVe femme, l^eakN/v^- heeled d^n^ jPeckle<X.
ADAM
SONS
Eternal smiles his emptiness betray.
As shallow streams run dimpling all the way.
Pope.
There are daggers in men's smiles.
Macbeth.
Every time a man lafFs he takes a kink out ov
the chain ov life, and thus lengthens it.
Josh Billings.
The man that blushes is not quite a brute.
Young.
He is a very good fellow, but pulpy; he v^ll run
into any mould, but he won't keep shape.
George Eliot.
Man is a very worm by birth,
Vile reptile, weak and vain!
Awhile he crawls upon the earth.
Then shrinks to earth again.
Pope.
A lawyer, — a gentleman who rescues your es- tate from your enemies and keeps it himself.
Lord Brougham. 61
ADAM'S SONS
He that abuses his own profession, will not pa- tiently bear with any one else that does so.
Caleb Colton.
Mere mushroom men — puff-balls that advertise And bravely think to brush the skies.
0\ven. Seaman.
His air, his voice, his looks, and honest soul.
Speak all so movingly in his behalf,
I dare not trust myself to hear liim talk.
Addison.
Man's like a banen and ungrateful soil, That seldom pays the labor of manuring.
Sir Robert Hotvard's "Blind L,ady."
He that Foretells his owm ccJamity eind makes Events before they come, twice over doth Endure the pains of evil destiny.
L>avenant.
62
ADAM'S SONS
How strange it is that some men, not contented with the large share of foppery and nonsense which they have from nature, should affect yet more.
Frances Bumey.
When a fellow has saved a thousand dollars, and every nickel represents a walk home instead of a ride in the trolley, and every dollar stands for cigars he didn't smoke and for shows he didn't see, it naturadly seems as if that money, when it's in- vested, ought to declare dividends every thirty days. George Horace Lorimer.
The bookful blockhead, ignorantly read. With loads of learned lumber in his head.
Pope.
He trudged zJong unknowing what he sought, And whistled as he went for Wcint of thought.
Dry den.
There's method in man's wickedness, — It grows up by degrees.
Fletcher.
63
ADAM'S SONS
O man! while in thy early years,
How prodigal of time ! Misspending all thy precious hours.
Thy glorious youthful prime ! Alternate follies take the sway ;
Licentious passions bum ;
With tenfold force give Nature's law,
That man was made to mourn.
Burns.
He holds his tongue until the people actually be- lieve he has something to say ; a mistake they could never fall into if he would but speak.
Maria Edgeworth.
A regular sawny, good-humored enough, but weak as water.
Edna L,yall.
Should vice expect to 'scape rebuke, Because its owner is a duke ?
Swift.
64
<5r^3<
„ , ffle^t) ij tf)e circled oaJ^,
ADAM'S SONS
A man who's subject to cramps and chills has no business in the water, but if you start to go in swimming, go in all over. Don't be one of those chappies who prance along the beach, shivering and showing their skinny shapes, and then dabble their feet in the surf, pour a little sand in their hair, and think they have had a bath.
George Horace Lorimer.
Shall quips and sentences and these paper bullets
of the brain awe a man from the career of his
humour ? No, the world must be peopled. When
I said I would die a bachelor, I did not think I
should live until I were married.
Shakespeare.
Sherry is dull, naturally dull; but it must have
taken him a great deal of pains to become what
we now see him. Such an excess of stupidity, sir,
is not in nature.
Johnson. 67
ADAM'S SONS
It is not good that man should be eJone.
Genesis.
A man so various, that he seemed to be
Not one, but all mankind's epitome ;
Stiff in opinions, always in the wrong,
Was everything by starts, and nothing long ;
But in the course of one revolving moon
Was ch5Tnist, fiddler, statesman, and buffoon.
Dry den.
For most men (till by losing rendered sager) Will back their own opinions by a wager.
Byron.
It isn't the twist of his mustache or the color of
his necktie that makes the man. It's the gray
matter he has in his head and the green matter in
his bank that we take off our hats to !
Nettie Seeley Murphy.
A fellow that makes no figure in company, And has a mind as narrow as the neck of a vin- egar cruet.
Johnson. 68
ADAM'S SONS
One of the principeil occupations of men is to
divine women.
Lacretelle.
Some men deserve glory and reward for having
written ; others for not having done so.
La Bruyere.
Man is not the Prince of creatures, But in reason ; fail that, he is worse Than horse, or dog, or beaist of waldemess
(////' '"
Field.
W 4
As long as mam seeks his mate, and prop>o8es ^-^^^^^^^^^ ,,^ / the union, lack of felicity impeaches only his judg- ^, J\,^^^^^^ v\
■: m
ment.
The Matrimonial Primer.
'//Ik #^P^\\;^" ((
Men who say they have exhausted life, merely
mean that life has exhausted them.
Huhb&rd. 69
ADAM'S SONS
IF
K ri I.
The things to be desired by mam in a healthy state, are that he should not see dreauns but real- ities; that he should not destroy life, but save it; and that he should be not rich, but content.
John Ruskin.
We succeed by shrewdness, — the other man
by trickery.
Lisle de Vaux Matthewtnan.
He has common sense in a way that's uncommon.
Hates humbug and cant, loves his friends like a
woman.
Lowell.
The man who knows only one subject is next tiresome to the man who knows no subject.
Anon.
I still believe him to have carried a spell with him to which it was a natural weakness to yield, and which not many persons could withstand.
Charles Dickens. 70
"=^
'Pbe fellow v/ljo lil(ej e<.co/f)cA beef ^.t^d caJj- bo^^e ^iel oftet) ipdyr^ej^p^tedefoie^gii^^^i/l.
ADAM'S SONS
Who do you think can hold that mules exist
but not asses?
Epictetus.
The wickeder a man is in this world, the more fool-women he will find to "poor thing" him.
Nettie Seeley Murphy.
Tew remove grease from a man's karakter, let
him strike sum sudden ile.
Josh Billings.
An enthusiEist has been compared to a man
walking in a fog; everything near him appears clear
and luminous; but beyond all is mist, error, and
confusion.
C. C. Colton.
Ah, why, all-righteous Father, didst thou make
This creature, man ? Why wake the unconscious
dust
To life and wretchedness?
Porteus.
73
^^
ADAM'S SONS
When he is best, he is litde worse than a man ;
and when he is worst, he is little better than a
beast.
Merchant of Venice.
The pity is not that man has descended from the monkey but that he keeps on descending.
Lisle de Vaux Matthewman.
A man who can be wound around a woman's finger, never winds himself around her hezut.
Minna Thomas Antrim.
Man has a perpetual tendency to disintegration,
Gail Hamilton.
Mules are like sum men, very corrupt at harte, — I have known them to be good mules for 6 months just to get a good chance to kik sumbody.
Josh Billings. 74
ADAM'S SONS
Experience is the name men give to their follies,
or their sorrows.
A. de Musset.
An idle man is like stagnant water: he corrupts
himself.
ILatena.
A slave has but one master. An eunbitious man has as many as may be useful for his advancement.
La Bruyere.
A man convinced ageiinst his will Is of the same opinion still.
Butler.
A man is a bundle of relations, a knot of roots,
whose flower emd fruitage is the world.
Emerson.
Old boys have playthings as well as young ones, the difference is only in the price.
^ li iz.
ADAM'S SONS
They say best men jure moulded out of faults ; And for the most part, become much more the better For being a little bad — so may my husband.
Shakespeare.
He that is respectable in his courses,
Oft sells his reputation at cheap market.
Ben Jonson.
How miserable a thing is a great man ;
Take noisy, vexing greatness they that please,
Give me obscure, and safe, and silent ease.
Crowrn.
Every man must row with the oars he has.
Chaos of thought and passion all confused Still by himself abused or disabused — Created half to rise and half to fall. Great Lord of all things, yet a prey to all ; Sole judge of truth, in endless error hurled ; The glory, jest, and riddle of the world.
Anon.
Pope.
Cooooooaoo
<70C=^0<7000>
ADAM'S SONS
Man blcimes Adam for having done what he himself does whenever the opportunity presents herself to him.
Lisle de Vaux Matthewman.
A man who has not anything to boast of but his illustrious ancestors is like a potato — the only good belonging to him is underground.
Sir Thomas Overbury.
Profound ignorance makes a man dogmatic ; he
who knows little thinks he may teach others what
he has just learned himself; whilst he who knows
a great deal can scarcely imagine that others are
ignorant.
La Bruyere.
Man is an inflammable piece of goods and
woman is the match.
Nettie Seeley Murphy.
Talk to him of Jacob's ladder and he would
ask the number of the steps.
Jerrold. 79
ADAM'S SONS
He who elevates his profession is the best me- X chanic, whether he preaches the gospel, peddles phisick, or skins eels for a living.
Anon.
He is a fool who makes his physician his heir.
French Proverb.
He who is successful cein sifford to smile; he that is not cannot £ifford to do otherwise.
Lisle de Vaux Matthewman.
He who ascends to mountain tops, shall find
The loftiest peaks most wrapt in clouds and snow;
He who surpasses or subdues mankind,
Must look down on the hate of those below.
Byron.
There is not in nature a thing that makes a man so deformed, so beastly, as doth intemperate anger.
"Webster.
When a man ridicules certain traits in other
men, he ridicules himself.
Elbert Hubbard.
ADAM'S SONS
A mam may be a duck in his own private puddle,
but when he strikes deep and strange waters he
forgets how to swim.
George Ade.
When you see a fellow swelling up and telling
his firm's secrets, holler "cash" and you'll stampede
him back to his haJl bedroom.
George Horace Lorimer.
A man will do for his bicycle what his wife asks
in vain.
Myrtle Reed.
As men's prayers are a disease of the will, so are their creeds a disease of the intellect.
Emerson.
Fond mam ! The vision of a moment made !
Dream of a dream! and shadow of a shade!
Young.
A man needs seasoning just as much as soup ^ ^^^^^^§
Nettie Seeley Murphy.
81
ADAM'S SONS
;
v^
Then what is man ? — And what man seeing this,
And having human feelings, does not blush
And hang his head, to think himself a man.
Cowper.
Men, like cats, need only to be stroked in the right direction.
Myrtle Reed.
The child who is father of the man often has cause to blush for his offspring.
Lisle de Vaux Matthewman.
When a man talks of sitting in sack-cloth and
ashes, he zJways means broad-cloth and cigar
ashes.
Fra Elbertus.
Know then thyself, presume not God to scan ; The proper study of mankind is man.
Pope,
-T ' Man, who madly deems himself the lord of all.
;
is naught but weakness and dependence.
Thomson..
""^
I ^\)t beccl^elor pdcvj \)ij rrjo^ev to^o ^.pii J^Wlt Itct \ urtj; tlje njAjrriie^ n)s^t) j^etj l)!5 adL qoit)^ for f)oib'9^ / dcf}^ vel 3orT)C' people, <Kof)'l j«,c. Ipc e^^VAQt^k^c
ADAM'S SONS
The man who smokes thinks like a sage and
acts like a Samaritan.
Edward Bulwer-L,ytton.
Just as long as men are paid honors and money, can wear good clothes, and have immunity from work for preaching superstition, they will preach it.
Fra Elbertus.
He who is not strong before twenty, handsome before thirty, wise before forty, and rich before fifty, — on such a man even beer is altogether lost.
German Proverb.
The only man we ever heard of that wasn't spoiled by being lionized was a Jew, named Daniel.
George D. Prentice.
Men may say of marriage eind women what
they please: they will renounce neither the one
nor the other.
Anon. 85
ADAM'S SONS
Men s^y of women what pleases them ; women do with men what pleases them.
De Segur.
One may smile emd smile and yet be a villeun.
Hamlet
A kind and gentle heart he had, To comfort friends and foes ; The naked every day he clad. When he put on his clothes.
Goldsmith.
About az low down az a man can git, and not quite spile, iz to liv on his wife's reputashun.
Josh Billings.
Mam carries his superiority inside, other animals
theirs outside.
Russian.
The dunces of all countries propagate the maxim that a man of genius is unfit for business.
Pope. 86
ADAM'S SONS
Every man Ccirries in his soul a sepulchre — that of his youth.
O. Firmez.
Every age has its different inclinations, but man is cJways the same. At ten he is led by sweet- meats, at twenty by a mistress, at thirty by pleasure,
at forty by ambition, at fifty by avarice.
J. J. Rousseau.
A mzm does not look behind the door unless he
has stood there himself.
Anon.
A sailor is a man who makes his living on water
but never touches it on shore.
Gideon Wurdz. \^^^^
Great men undertake great things because they
are great, and fools because they think them easy.
Vauvenargues.
Many a man labors for the day he will never
live to see.
Danish. ((( 87
ADAM'S SONS
When the Lord makes a virtuous man or a
vaiinless woman, the devil feels like shutting up shop.
Nettie Seeley Murphy.
Always suspect a man who affects great softness
of manner, an unruffled evenness of temper, and
an enunciation studied, slow, and deliberate. The
most successful knaves are usually of this description,
as smooth as razors dipped in oil, and as sharp.
They affect the innocence of the dove, which they
have not, to hide the cunning of the serpent, which
they have.
C. C. Colton.
Man's most unlovable traits are those which could have been easily eradicated by the timely appli- cation of the cowhide.
Lisle de Vaux Matthewman.
Prone is man's mind from Honor's arduous way To verge into the temporary paths of gain.
Pindar.
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ADAM'S SONS
Fame sometimes hath created something of nothing.
Fuller.
Some men possess means that are great, but fritter them away in the execution of conceptions that are little ; and there are others who can form great conceptions, but who attempt to Ccirry them into execution with little means.
Colton.
A crowd of fellows in the cafe of a smart club will make the conversation at a woman's luncheon sound like table talk in a mute asylum.
Herman Lee Meader.
Here's to man; he is like a kerosene lamp, he
is not especially bright, he is often turned down,
he generally smokes, and he frequently goes out at
night.
Anon.
91
ADAM'S SONS
Every man has his innings as well as his outings.
L. S. L.
A bachelor seeks a wife to avoid solitude; a married man seeks society to avoid the tete-a-tete.
De Varennes.
Women complain of the lack of virtue in men, yet do not esteem those who are too strictly virtuous.
BlondeL
Men love the unattainable virtue; women the
unattainable pocket-book.
Nettie Seeley Murphy.
Fortune does not chjinge men : it unmasks them.
Mine. Necker.
One of the hardest things for amy man to do u.
tew fall down on the ice when it is wet, and then
git up and praze the Lord.
Josh Billings.
If the best man's faults were written on his fore- head, it would make him pull his hat over his eyes.
Gaelic. 92
ADAM'S SONS
A bat in the hand is better than two in the head. "Little Bead-eyes."
Men will wrangle for religion ; write for it ; fight
for it; die for it; anything but — U've for it.
Colton.
Mankind love mysteries; a hole in the ground excites more wonder than a star up in heaven.
Anon.
The covetous man is like a sponge; it takes in all the moisture that comes near it, but lets out none until it is squeezed.
Man, I tell you, is a vicious animal!
Anon.
Moliere.
Every man is occasionaUy what he ought to be
perpetually.
Anon.
A man has two eairs and one mouth that he hear much and speak little.
German Proverb.
93
ADAM'S SONS
Few men would care to be "snapshotted" until
they had had time to pose.
Liisle de Vaux Matthewman.
While pensive poets pjiinful vigils keep,
Sleepless themselves to give their readers sleep.
Pope.
What an exceUent thing did God bestow upon man when he gave him a good stomach.
Beaumont Sh Fletcher.
There's no trust, no faiith, no honesty in men; All perjured, all forsworn, all naught, all dissemblers.
Shakespeare.
Man is a vagabond, both poor and proud, He treads on beasts who give hin: clothes and food.
Crofvn. They say he sits All day in contemplation of a statue With ne'er a nose, and dotes on the decays; With greater love than the self.-loved Narcissus Did on his beauty ; How shall I approach him ?
Shakerly Maruyon's Antiquary.
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> oo o^o ^sz^ooooooo
ADAM'S SONS
It is easier to be a lover than a husband, for the
same reason that it is more difficult to be witty
every day than novv^ and then.
Balzac.
Men never think their fortune too great nor their
wit too little.
Anon.
No man is so tall that he need never stretch, and none so small that he need never stoop.
Danish Proverb.
in most men there is a dead poet whom the
man survives.
Sainte-Beuve.
A man with a very small head is like a pin
without enny, very apt to git into things beyond hiz
depth.
■Josh Billings.
A man that's fond precociously of stirring
Must be a spoon.
Thomas Hood. 97
-J' ■',
n
ADAM'S SONS
You could take these men and soak their heads over night in a pailful of ideas, and they wouldn't absorb an)^hing but the few loose cuss-words that were mixed in for flavoring.
Old Gorgon Graham's Letters.
Though man a thinking being is defined, Few use the grand prerogative of mind. How few think justly of the thinking few ! How many never think who think they do !
Jane Taylor.
None but himself can be his parallel.
Theobald.
Men are but children of a larger growth.
Dry den.
Distrust him who talks much of his honesty.
Dussaulx.
Maoiy a man who has never been able to man- age his own fortune, nor his wife, nor his children, has the stupidity to imagine himself capable of man- aging the affairs of a nation. 98
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diidi r)QV(Lt^ put l)cr^ pr^<?ciou5 Jev/el3 ir>to m^9 h)^^ QVci^ Vc?y ^iropty
ADAM'S SONS
To remain virtuous, a man has only to combat his own desires ; a woman must resist her own in- clinations, and the continual attack of man.
Latena.
Never take a wife till thou hast a house (and a fire) to put her in.
Franklin.
Men and melons are hard to know.
A.non. r''
Thought is the first faculty of man ; to express
it, one of his first desires ; and spread it, his dearest
privilege.
Raynal. ^
Man is but man, inconstant still, and various ! There's no to-morrow in him like to-day ! Perhaps the storms rolling in his brain. Make him think honestly the present hour. The next a swarm of base, ungrateful thoughts May mount aloft.
ADAM'S SONS
There is only one thing that saves many a man from being a goose — his sex.
Lisle de Vaux Matthewman.
For one Orpheus who went to Hell to seek his
wife, how mamy widowers who would not even go
to Paradise to find theirs.
/. Petit-Senn.
He who is never guilty of follies is not so wise as he imagines.
La Rochefoucauld.
He who praises me on all occasions is a fool who despises me or a knave who wishes to cheat
Chinese.
Man is not depraved by true pleasures, but
by false ones.
De LiacreteJIe.
The weaJthiest man is he who is most economical; the poorest is he who is most miserly.
.m.
ADAM'S SONS
One mzui falls by his aunbition, cinother by his
perfidy, a third by his avarice, and a fourth by
his lust.
Ajton.
A bad man becomes worse when he apes a
saint.
Syrua.
A good man's pedigree is little hunted up.
Spanish Proverb.
Little men spell things out with sweat £ujd lamp smoke, but others there be who absorb in the mass, read by the page, and grow great by letting down their buckets.
Hubbard.
Mcin! Thou pendulum betwixt a smile emd a
tear!
Byron.
A mam that has done a kindness should never proclaim it, but do another as fast as he can ! just like a vine that bears again the next season.
Marcus Aurelius. 103
ADAM'S SONS
If this man had not twelve thousand a year he would be a very stupid fellow.
Jane Austen.
Thare ain't but phu men who kan stick a white handkerchief into the brest pocket ov their over- coat without letting a lettle ov it stick out, — just bi acksident.
Josh Billings.
He who goes with wolves learns to howl.
Spanish.
A man, as he manages himself, may die old at thirty or young at eighty.
Anon. He who has neither friend nor enemy is with- out tcdents, powers, or energy.
Lavater.
No man but a blockhead ever wrote except for money.
Johnson.
ADAM'S SONS
A man is in general better pleased when he has a good dinner than when his wife talks Greek.
Samuel Johnson.
For every inch that is not fool is rogue.
Dry den.
A man may cry "Church! Church!" at every word With no more piety than other people ; A daw's not reckoned a religious bird, Because it keeps a-cawing from a steeple.
Thomas Hood.
If man knew well what life is, he would not
give it so inconsiderately.
Mme. Roland.
When you strike ile stop boreing; menny a man haz bored klean thru and let the ile run out at the bottom.
Josh Billings. 107
ADAM'S SONS
Man argues women may not be trusted too far ; woman feels man cannot be trusted too near.
Browne.
Old men are always jeeJous; they are like the greedy child who wants the cake it cannot eat.
A. Ricard.
Men would not live long in society if they were
not the dupes of each other.
L,a Bruyere.
There are two kinds of men that I don't want to
meet when in a great hurry ; men that I owe and
men that want to owe me.
Anon.
Blessed is the man who, having nothing to say, abstains from giving wordy evidence of the fact, from calling us to look through a heap of millet- seed in order to be sure there is no pearl in it.
George Eliot. 106
ADAM'S SONS
Qualities of a too superior order render a man less adapted to society. One does not go to mar- ket with big lumps of gold ; one goes with silver
or small change.
Chamfort.
Great men, like comets, are eccentric in their
courses, and formed to do extensive good, by
modes uninteOigible to vulgar minds.
C. C. Colton.
Shallow men speak of the past, wise men of the
present, and fools of the future.
Mme. du Deffand.
Men who think alike and feel alike do not have to "get acquciinted." Heart speaks to heart.
Fra Elbertus.
Man was built after all other things were made and pronounced good. If not he would have in- sisted on giving his orders as to the rest of the job.
Anon.
A little, round, fat, oily man of God
ADAM'S SONS
,(^
(pa
M
Sum marry for buty, and never discover their
mistake ; this is lucky.
Josh Billings.
He who is devoted to everybody is devoted to
nobody.
C. Delavigne.
He knows little who wiD tell his wife all he knows.
Fuller.
Men lived like fishes ; the great ones devoured
the small.
Algernon Sidney.
Every man is practically three men, — the man l //f you knew before he proposed, the man you ac- cepted; and the man you've married.
John Oliver Hobbes.
^^ ^. What a piece of work is man! how noble in
'^P^^W /i) reason, how infinite in faculty ! in form and mov-
ing how admirable ! in action how like an angel !
in apprehension how like a god ! the beauty of the
world! the paragon of animals!
Shakespeare.
^ I I II I II ■■ " " ~
wl^erj "^ou f}6 rr)(Lr} ^Pd b\?. It^ too (I ipuch ^bei^e d^r^e boup^ to buma^r)
ADAM'S SONS
God be thanked, the meanest of his creatures Boasts two soul-sides, — one to face the world with, One to show a woman when he loves her.
Browning.
It is as difficult to find a vain man w^ho considers himself appreciated as it is to find a modest man who thinks himself undervalued.
La Bruyere.
All poets pretend to write for immortality, but
the whole tribe have no objection to present pay
and present praise.
C. C. Colton.
It is barely possible that you have a wife who would prefer a daily letter during your absence in- stead of some new bauble on your return.
Matrimonial Primer.
A gentleman is a man who looks and acts like a gentleman even when he isn't dressed like a gentle- man.
From Sovereign Woman versus Mere Man. 113
ADAM'S SONS
Men, like cattle, follow him who leads.
Byron.
Great men are like meteors ; they glitter and are consumed to enlighten the world.
Napoleon I.
An honest man, close button'd to the chin. Broadcloth without, and a warm heart within.
Cowper.
He was a very good hater.
Johnson.
Married men who jure allowed one night a week at their club are like old horses turned into a pas- ture. They want to cut up, but have forgotten how.
Meader.
He who thinks he can do wnthout the world deceives himself ; but he who thinks that the world cannot do wnthout him is still more in error.
La Rochefoucauld. 114
ADAM'S SONS
A mcin has but the one puny life ; the one tiny spark of faith. Better be venturesome with both for God's sake, than over cautious, over thrifty.
Mrs. Humphry Ward.
Give your preference to the lean man and the middle weights. The world is full of smart and rich fat men, but most of them got their smartness and their riches before they got their fat.
George Horace Lorimer.
Limited in his nature, infinite in his desires, man is a faUen god who remembers heaven.
He that can please nobody is not so much to
be pitied as he that nobody can please.
C.
TTie rarer a man's qualities are, the more he will be found fait with, — dust on a dimond iz alwuss
more noticeable than dust on a brik.
Josh Billings. 115
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ADAM'S SONS
The sallow man taking tea and toast in a far comer of a restaurant may be a millionaire, but the hearty fellow shouting for terrapin and canvas- back is probably earning a hundred and fifty a month.
Merman L,ee Meader.
There are two kinds of men who succeed as
pubhc characters, — men of no principle but of great
talent, and men of no talent, but of one principle,
that of obedience to their superiors.
Bishop of Liandaff.
We're not denying that women are foolish; God Almighty made them to match the men.
George Eliot.
Let me have men about me that are fat. Sleek-headed men, and such as sleep o* nights : Yond Cassius has a lean and hungry look ; He thinks too much : such men are dangerous.
Shakespeare's "Julius Caesar."
The fool of fate, — thy manufacture, man.
Pope. 116
&^r>A 2^ junr^p, Witl^ botl^ cy'e^ ir)td9t 09
ADAM'S SONS
Of all men, Adam was the happiest — he had
no mother-in-law.
P. Parfait.
He might have proved a useful adjunct, if not an ornament to society.
Every great man is a unique
Charles Liamb.
Anon.
A necessitous man who gives costly dinners pays
large sums to be laughed at.
Colton.
It is as easy for the strong man to be strong as
for the weak to be weak.
Emerson. '
He that is so very solicitous about being taJked of when he is dead, and makes his memory his in- clination, does not consider that all who knew him will quickly be gone, that his faime wiU grow less in the next generation, and flag upon the course.
Marcus Aurelius.
ADAM'S SONS
Men spend their lives in anticipations, in deter- mining to be vastly happy at some period Tvfien they haJfe time* We may lay in a stock of pleasures as w^e would lay in a stock of wine ; but if we defer tasting them too long, we shall find
that both are soured by age.
C. C. Colton.
A man uses up his best energies in being agree- able to other people, and then drags the dregs of himself home to a patient wife and expects her to
"poor dear" him.
Nettie Seeley Murphjf.
Men may blush to hear what they were not ashamed to act.
Anon.
He draweth out the thread of his verbosity finer than the staple of his argument.
Liove's Liabor's Lost.
A very gentle heast and of a good conscience.
Shakespeare.
122
ADAM'S SONS
Man, proud man,
Drest in a little brief authority,
Most ignorant of what he's most assured,
His glassy essence — like an angry ape.
Plays such fantastic tricks before high heaven
As makes the angels weep!
Shakespeare.
Geniuses may go about unshorn, but don't try to measure all men's brains by the length of their hair.
Merman Lee Meader.
The man who is allwuss trying to kreate a sen-
sashun, will git so pretty soon, that he kant even
kreate a disturbance.
Josh Billings.
Man spends his life in reasoning on the past, in
complaining of the present, and in trembling for
the future.
Rivarol. 125
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