(Bobbarb's Satirpcall Dialog

a

Satir^call 2)ialogv>e

OR A SHARPLYE-INVECTIUE CONFER ENCE BETWEENE ALLEXANDER THE GREAT AND THAT TRUELY WOMAN-HATER DIOGYNES

[BY WILLIAM GODDARD]

Imprinted in the Lowcountryes

[? Dortf 1615] for all such gentlewomen

as are not altogeather Idle nor yet well

OCVPYED

FROM A UNIQUE COPY IN THE BRITISH MUSEUM

EDITED BY JOHN S. FARMER

LONDON

PRIVA TEL Y PRINTED FOR SUBSCRIBERS ONL Y MDCCCXCVII

>'

INTRODUCTION

[UR knowledge of WILLIAM GODDARD, the satirist, is scanty, even as his books are scarce. Internal evidence is likewise, for the most part, want ing ; his satires being in general of an impersonal character.

Flourishing in the reign of King James the first Goddard is thought to have belonged to the Middle Temple; he also appears to have lived for some time in Holland holding there an ap pointment in a civil capacity. At all events two of his. books were " imprinted in the Lowcountryes" ; one of them "A Neaste of Wasps, " most certainly at Dort in the year 1615, and the other, the present reprint, was also probably issued from the same press.

Beyond these facts nothing is certain. There was (says The National Dictionary of Biography],

XII INTRODUCTION

in July 1634, one William Goddard, "Doctor of Physic at Padua, " who was incorporated in the same degree at Oxford ; but his identity with the satirist seems doubtful.

GODDARD'S known books are three in number, and are as follows: —

A Satyricall Dialogue, or a sharply e invectiue conference between Allexander the Great and that truelye woman-hater Diogynes. . . Imprinted in the Lowcountryes for all such gentlewomen as are not alltogeather Idle nor yet well occupy ed. [PDort? 1615.]

A Neaste Of Wasps latelie found out and discovered in the Law [Low] Countreys yealding as sweete hony as some of our English bees. [At Dort... 1615.]

A Mastif Whelp, with other ruff-Island-lik Currs fetcht from among the Antipedes. Which bite and barke at the fantasticall humorists and abusers of the time... Im printed at the Antipedes •, and are to be sould where they are to be bought. [1598.]

Curiously enough, all seem to have been issued without the name either of printer or publisher;

INTRODUCTION

a fact which would seem to indicate that they failed to obtain the usual license. The title page of "A Mastif Whelp" informs us that the book was " Imprinted at the Antipedes and are to bee sould where they are to be bought." A further clue may possibly be found in the first dedi cation [Sat. Dia. Aa], in the last four lines of which a reference is seemingly made to the burning of Marston's "Satires." This, however, is a mere surmise; and if censorship was really exercised over Goddard's productions it is difficult to see the reason why; for, though his satire would now-a-days be counted gross, his diction was no coarser than that of most of his contemporaries. His second dedication " to the senceless censurer " seems also to point in the direction I have in dicated.

At all events, such a fact, could it be estab

lished, would go far to explain the extreme rarity

of Goddard's works. Of " A Satyricall Dialogue, "

the present reprint, only one copy is known to

exist, that being in the British Museum ; whilst two

copies are extant of " A Neaste of Wasps." One is

n the library of Worcester College, Oxford, and

another in the private collection at Bridgewater

House. His " Mastif Whelp " is only to be found

in the Bodleian.

Goddard's satire was almost entirely levelled

XIV INTRODUCTION

against women, and in not a few instances his pen was dipped in the bitterest invective and scorn. Especially is this noticeable in "A Satyricall Dialogue" which he doubly dedicates to the " bewteous . . . most puissaunt creatures of the Earth, Woemen," and " to the 'senceless' Censurer," the argument of which I will briefly outline.

Alexander the Great comes in disguise from his court to ask Diogines why he is for ever a recluse, and never seen in the busy haunts of men. Diogines replies that courts and courtiers are not to his taste : he is no wine-bibbing, gluttonous sycophant, but an honest man. Alexander contends that such disdain comes but of lack of travel and want of knowledge of the world. " Not so : all sorts and kinds of men and women, " says Diogines, has he seen. " But, " quoth Alexander, " does not Diogines at least care for the delights that come of women?" at court he may "take viewe of ladies trymm." All in vain Alexander pleads ; for, says the recluse, " all woemen I haue scene ; all are wanton, all are badd," and he would

"rather dwell A thousand tymes, a single man in hell"

than married be ; it " galls his gutts " a woman's tongue to hear. Alexander retorts : —

INTRODUCTION XV

v

" Oh harsh-sowre, crabby Cynniclc, still I see, To gentle creatures thou wilt stubborne bee : If with a girle th'ast neuer slept a night, Thy soule hath neuer tasted sweet delight

» » » » (a Virgins grace), Which tripps lavaltoes in each maydens face, When men's fowle tongues o're-flowes with ribaldery, Should make thee loue maidens, for their modestie."

Maids modest? " Nay, Maids can feign modesty, yet by themselves their tongues do wag in all too broad talk." And then Diogines relates "The Three Wanton Sisters Wanton Dreams " wherein he shows : —

"what modest chat Young maids will have when by themselves they're got"

Still Alexander is unconvinced : " ill is done to accuse so generally, " so Diogines continues his experiences — how once he feigned to be a mar ried wife, and overheard the counsel of one Madam Will "in various guise to women wronged "—shall he the story tell ? " Why, yes, " and so the cynic proceeds to narrate the advice the old bawd gave concerning (a) an old wife's complaint of her young husband ; (6) a young wife wedded to a jealous old man ; and (c) the churlish spouse of a gossipping wife. And so the two discuss the whole range of women's ills, Alexander

XVI INTRODUCTION

at length disclosing himself in a last but vain attempt to induce Diogines to change his tub for a courtly hall.

So far the summary; for the rest the student (and only for such are these reprints made) will not need to be longer delayed from Goddard's caustic lines. It only remains to mention that in 1878 Dr. Furnivall prepared Goddard's three known books with a view to republishing them, but they were never issued, and Dr. Furnivall's notes and materials have now been generously placed at the disposal of the present editor.

S A T I R Y-

CALL DIALO-

GVE OR A SHAR-

plye - invectiue conference, be- tweene Allexander the great, and that truelye woman-hater Diogy- nes.

Jmprinted in the Lowcountryes for all fuch gentlewomen as are not alto gether Idle nor yet well

OCVPYED.

THE VERTVOVS,

bewteous : to the all-illuftrious, and

moft puiffaunt creatures of the Earth, WOE- MEN: Willy am Goddard, fole defirer of th'yncreafe of your bewtyes, and chiefe adorer of your goddes-like vertues (with al reuerence to your Angelicall fex,) commendes to your proteftion this harfh vnlearned

DIALOG VE.

Tarrs of this earthlieheauen,you whofeeffence Compofd was of mans pur eft quyntejfence, To you (to virtuous you] I dedicate This fnaggy^fprigg, hew' d from a crabby pate, Wherein (Celeftiall bewties) you Jliall fee, ] Howe 0/^Diogynes extolleth yee. We men, doe loue to fee ourfelues vp-raifd,

Andjocond are, to heare our own felues praifd

But (oh you fpringes of Wifdome !) / doe find

That is a thing moft hatefull to your kind.

Yet old Diogynes did fee your worth,

Such worth hee fawe as needes heed paint it forth.

Accept his loue; for all the Cynnicks deedes

Out of true zeale vnto your fex proceedes.

With reverent zeale, as high as ttiazurdfkyes,

Your virtuous deedes, the old man magnifies.

Contrary wife, he with a bitter penn

Inveftivelie doth write againft bad men,

Comaunding them, that what foe e're they doe,

They alwaies fkould example take by you. Badd are thefe men,fuch is their e pern erf e kind,

They burne all bookes wherein theire faults they find.

And therefore (earthlie aungells) my defire

Is, you' I protect this from confuming fire.

The euer-faythfull houourer of your celeftyall Sex,

Willyam Goddard.

A 2 To

To the fenceles Cenfurer.

Afh Reader, read my booke, and when tis read Difdaynefullie through't o're thy muddy head Thy condemnations peale a both fides ringe : Rafh men are priviledgd t'faie anie thing, And therefore (hare-braine] reade, crie mewe diflike :

My fpleene fwells not when fooles with babies ftrike. Pack hence, precifion : cry'fl it is obfceane ? Diue deeper, Jhallowe pate : knowe what I meane. Knowe what I meane ? alas ! what hope haue I ? Since carpers mindes haue but a poreblynd eye. Yet to prevent thy cenfures, thus muche knowe, Whollye this booke was made,yfc//z> to fhowe, And he which laies ope tymes abufe, and vice, Are iildome blam'd of men Judicious wife :

At which I ay'md ; and therefore, duncepate, hence, Or looke for lafhes for thy rude offence.

IVilliam G.

A SATIRYCALL DIA-

LOGVE OR A SHARPLYE-IN- VECTIVE CONFERENCE Between*

ALLEXANDER THE CREATE

and that

Truly e woman-hater Diogynes. Allexander.

Hy howe nowe, Cynnick, what duft doe a daies That thou in tubb art coop't-vp htus alwaies?

Diogynes.

"\7[ 7Hat doe I doe? not daunce from howfe to howfe,

* * To bibb in wynes fweete luice, cache dambd corrowfe. Nor doe I gallop it from place to place, To viewe each faire bewitching painted face ; Nor fluddye howe, this populous world to wynn, My ftuddy's howe, to beate and conquer fynn. I ftuddye not wherewith my gutts to cramm : On what foe ere I feede, well pleafd I am. To mee's all one the fyn'ft and grofleft meate; So't wholefome be, I nere care what I eate. With in my felfes a world, and it is true I howrlie fight, all that world to fubdue. And thefe fell-fighters bee the enymies, That rebell-like, againfte me dailie rife. Vaine Pryde (my cheifeft foe) the leading hath Of thefe feirce-foes : loathd drunkenness1 and Wrath, With Averice, S loathe, Gluttonie, and Luft,

- drunkenues, orig. A 3 Encounter

old

Encounter hottlie eu'rie dale I muft ; To beate downe thefe, I daylie doe devife; To this end, I vfe ftrenght and pollicies : I ftuddy not, nor trouble I my witt Howe I by flatt'ry fhould be fauouritt Vnto greate Allexander. I would refufe To be that monarchs felfe, If I might chufe.

Allexander. HPHou wouldft not; wouldfl?

Diogynes. would, by loue I vowe.

I

Allexander.

A Las (poore fillie fnake) why what art thou?

Diogynes.

WHat thou art not : I am an honeft man ; And then (I hope) the more vnlike thee than. I am no Courtyer, I, for once by chaunce I with another man's faire wife did daunce, Yet Icie-vayned-I (vnfett a fire) Did freeze mofte coldlie in loues hott defire : I did indeed : but doe you heare me, hoe ? Was e're hott-blouded Courtyer frozen foe ? I am noe Lawyer, I, for once there was A poore man praide me vndertake his cafe : Quoth he, praie vndertakt, and you fhall haue your fee Though you fitt dumb, and nothing fpeake for me. But I refufd it, I : yet harke you, hoe, What Lawyer ere refufd, and tempted foe ? I am noe younger-brother brauelie fprighted, For once a vfring golden Affe (benighted) Quite laden with his full ftuft treafure baggs, By me that dreaming drudge all feareles laggs ; Yet honefl I (vntempted with this fight) Though emptie mavd, at this baite would not bite.

Hence capring Courtyer, afk you who I am ?

Goe, gett you hence, fcudd quick from whence you came.

Allexander.

dogg barkes.

Allexander.

QYnnick, you are to fharpe: did you but knowe me, V/I am aflurd, more reu'rence you would fhowe me.

Diogynes.

TTOwe? I fhowe reverence? noe, vnderftand A J-That Allexander getts none at my hand.

Allexander.

TN faithe, Diogynes, thou hafte not beene, •Mn all thy life, where anie thing th'aft feene. Yf thoudft but trauayle, and fome fafhions fee, Thoudft anfwere none, as nowe thou aunfwerft me.

Diogynes.

T TAue I not trauayld? ha? yes, yes, I trowe,

(Spruce fellowe) thou hafle neuer trauailed foe. Where I haue bene, theres fewe hath1 euer beene, But yet men faie noe wonders I haue feene. Why, once I fawe a ritch-left heire to weepe, When's old dadd tooke his euerlafting fleepe. Once did I fee a bewteous maide (tis ftraunge!) Liue twentie yeares, yet not that title chaunge. Once did I fee a wife in mourninge weede Shedd teares ouer hir hufbands courfe indeed. I once did fee a Cytizens faire wife Liue at the Courte, he leading elfe wher'es life, And hee (ins witt) noe wifer then an afle ; Yet was hee brow'd, more fmothe then fmotheft glafle. Once did I fee a King giues foes the foile, And gaue his fouldyers leaue to take the fpoile : And lafllie, once I was in fuch a Court, Where 'bout the- King noe flattrers did refort. Where I haue beene, oh furelie none haue beene, Then why faie you, noe wonders I haue feene? 1 harh, or*. ' A 4 Alexander.

The old

Allexander.

faith, Diogynes, me thinkes thefe are Not things (as thou wouldfl make em) wondrous rare : The like in eu'rie place and realme I fee, Th'are comon, man, they ordynarie be.

Diogynes.

r"pHofe, ordynarie thinges ? I fayth, fir, noe ; ••• Thefe thinges are th' ordynarie thinges, I trowe : To fee faire bewtious ladies nowe adaies Refufe to take at once both pricke and praife : Of both the 'ile not accept, for {till thofe men Which gives the one, fhall tother have agenn. The other thinges ? why ! thofe are wondrous rare ; Thefe be the thinges that ordynarie are : To fee how Lords fhake-of their ferving men, And ho we their ladies take them on agen, Holding em in (vnto their Lords unknowne) To ride in private with them vp and downe. T' fee mercers bookes fild-vp with courtyers names ; To fee your mincyng bewteous cyttie dames Haue alwaies fome one gallant of the court (As kinsman to them) to theire howfe refort. To fee a plaine kind man loue none foe much As he which giues his pate the cuckolds tutch. Thefe, thefe are ordynarie, man : alfo This thing is as much ordynarie too, To fee your ritch old country fquires to wedd Their chamber maides vnto theire fervaunts bedd, But firfte themfelues to take the maydenhead, Then place them in fome cottage nere at hand To haue theire fervice readie at comaund. Thou faydft the firft were ordynarie thinges : Awaie, awaie : why, man, to fee on kinges Howe Daunger, plaine cloathd fmoothly-fmiling Daunger, Wayteth on them, attending like noe ftraunger, But like fome fmyling countenanced freind, Onelie to giue too's Prince his fatall end :

Thoult

dogg barkes.

Thoult fay, perhaps, this is noe common thing ;

But thoud'ft vnfay't againe wert thou a king. What thinges are common, and not common be, Thy fhallowe reatch cannot conceaue, I fee.

Allexander.

"MTAie, fie, Diogynes, infaith thou art -^ In thy conclufions, Hill a dram to tart; I pray thee lett me foe prevaile with thee, As ride to Allexandcrs court with mee; Twill mend thee much, and I will vndertake The King fhall byd thee welcome for my fake.

Dwgynes.

T 7Nto my Tubb, lett Allexander come;

* I'me in a Pallace, when I'me in this home ; Let thofe that lift, vnto thy king refort, Tis not my lift : what fhould I doe at's court?

Allexander.

AS others doe ; in fpending of fmale pelfe, Thou maifte in tyme to honour raife thy felfe.

Dwgynes.

I cannot fawne, my tongue too ruftie is ; I bafhfull am ; I'm nothing boldlie rude, I rather chufe Court delecates to miffe, Then with a brazen face my felfe ty'ntrude : In tubb (coop't-vp) I will Hue euer mude, And euer Hue vppon fowre garden woortes, Er'e lie' a flattr'er be, and followe cortes,

I cannot turne my tongue to praife and laude A foone-lamb'd prick-eard proud-feerce firy fteed; I cannot, Fyndalls full deep mouth applaude, Nor fweare the greate-mans grew hound hath beft fpeed,

B When

The old

When hee doth plaie the flowe-flugg curr indeed. Though fome cann doo't, yet fuch is my fowre kind I neuer could, though't gall's his fweld puft1 mind ;

I cannot tell the greate foole hee is wife, Nor tell fowle ladies they are wondrous faire. I ne're applaude aboue heauns-fpangled fkies, The curld-worne treffes of dead-borrowd haire.

Like Northern blafte I breathe my crittick aire; I am noe Mimyck ape, I loathe and hate, Each light-braind giddy-head to Imytate.

I cannot brooke to fuck the livings bloud

Of thefe old Vfrer's ritch-left prodigalls;

I nourifh not with fuch fweete-bitter food ;

I hate to rife by other mens downe falls.

I knowe tis 111, though other think tis good ;

Though fome doe think fuch papp all fweete to be,

Yet I doe not; it poyfon proues to me.

To make fhort worke, I neuer loud' vaine fportes, And therefore I'me vnfitt for Prynces Courtes!

Allexander.

'T\Iogynes, thou art deceyued quite ; •*~^In vanities, Kinges take the leait delight. He vndertake none fhall refpefted bee (Yf thou wilt followe him), better then thee. Come to the Court, and then in feeing him Thou alfo mayfte take viewe of ladies trymm. Mee thinkes hee is too dull and fadd of fpright That in a bewteous dame takes noe delight.

Why, hee that's mary'd, is in heauen all night.

Diogynes.

HPHere lett him bee, for I had rather dwell, / •*- A thoufand tymes, a ilngle man in hell. I am affurd that ther'es noe Divell cann (Like to a wife) torment a mary'd man.

1 pust, orig.

dogg barkes.

Il'e none of them, I'me euer worfe a yeare When once I doe a woman's tongue but heare. It galls my gutts when I a woman fee, I

He not once come where fuch ftraunge creatures be. > Come, hold your tongue, and prate no more to me. \

Allexander.

~M"Aie, good Diogynes, bee not ioe quick, A fl hope yet, 'ere I die, fee thee loue fick.

Diogynes.

T Oue-ficke ? why, I doe loue thefe women foe,

•"As I'me foe fonde, I knowe not what to doe. Such is my loue vnto the f email Kind, As were I Empr'our of Uiynfernall lake, But Women, none with me flwuld favour fynd, One man into my Kingdome Id'e not take.

Ide' fend my fer vaunts out, to fearch and fee,

To bring all women in the world to mee.

Allexander.

BYth, mafle, Diogynes, thou louft em well ! Wert thou the King and gouernour of hell, Thou wouldft, I fee, advaunce the women kind, There is noe want of will hadft thou1 thy mind. Wert thou (I fee) the prince of that faire place, Women (one-lie) with thee fhould be in grace. I fee, thoudft very carles be of men, I fee, thoudft women haue, t' attend thee then.

Diogynes.

I That I would, and this they fhould be bold, Ide carefull be they fhould not freeze with cold.

Allexander.

IFayth, Diogynes, I doubt th'aft euer Beene privatelie a vild laciuious liuer.

B 2 Or

1 to, ong.

The old

Or neuer hafte beene yet (I greatelie feare) Where anie one faire vertuous creature weare.

N

Diogynes.

Or nere will looke to be : I am too wife To thinke that vertue cann remaine in vice.

Allexander.

V\ 7Ert thou at Court, thou'dft alter then thy mind, ^ * When women thou didft fee, foe wondrous kind. Forfake this Tubb, t'is folliterie 111, And howe to court faire ladies, learne the fkyll.

Diogynes.

NOwe, by the luflfull fire, hott boiling vaines, Of that fame wanton greate god lupiter, I am vn fkild in thefe fpeech-pleafing ftraines, To courte a wenche when I come vnto hir.

I'me then an all-mute, dumb, and furlie fir ; I cannot lifpe, nor cann I courtlike faie ; When I doe women woe, I runn my waye.

I cannot finge, nor can I turne my tongue To chaunte a Syren-charming quau'ring dittye ; When I thefe bewties chaunce to come amonge, My lead-fade-fable lookes mufl moue their pittie,

All what is in me then is all vnwittie. I want thefe warbling noates to win their loues, Nor cann I prickfong fett which better moues.

I cannot mufick it, nor finger fyne A fweete-cleare-throated, eare-charme inflrument ; I'me not poflefte with fuch fweet parts devyne, Whereby to caufe faire bewties merryment.

T'ynchaunt theire eares nothing cann I invent ; And well knowe I, that women take delight In thefe fame inftruments, both daie and night.

dogg barkes.

I cannot daunce, nor with my fprawling heeles Cann I the ny'mble cutt-heele caper kick, My fullen bloud an other humour feeles ; To woe a wench, I want the wanton trick.

I am a milkfopp then, I then am fick Againe, ftreng[t]hes moyfture in my1 vaines is fkant, Which women after dauncing mufl not want. And, therefore pry thee, fellowe, lett me refte : Of all thefe worldly Courtes, my Tubb's the beft.

Allexander.

'T^\Iogines, my meaning is miftooke :

*-^I would not that your Tubb be quite forfooke,

But for your recreation nowe and then

Youd' goe too th' Court, from court t' your tubb agen.

Miftake me not, it will for your good tend ;

A wifeman alwaies lyften will too's friend.

Diogynes.

NAie, would you would thefe complementes forbeare; For Courtyers friendfhipps, I did neuer care; Yet fhould I chufe a friend, a Courtyer than I would make choife-of, fore another man. By this example I will plainlie proue, That like to Courtyers, none doe trulie loue ; Like to apparell they doe loue theire friend, To what (like that) doe they theire loues extend ; ^ Like cloathes they loue theire friendes : why that is true, luft like em, caufe they nere loue cloathes but newe. Pack hence, for fuch loue fhould I find of you.

Allexander.

NAie, fye, Diogynes, you can (yf lift) Forbeare to plaie this crabb-fowre fatirift. I pry thee, Cynnick, broach thy milder braine, And let thy wordes runn in a fweeter vaine, In others natures too too much thou2 markft.

B i Againlt

1 may, orig. 8 you, ong.

The old

Againft theire faultes too rufly loud thou barkft ;

I doe diflike it, I, I pry thee ceafe ;

Thoud'ft gaine more loue, yf thou didft hold thy peace :

Turne courtyer, man, come, be thou pollitick wife ;

He bed wynns loue, that belt can footh-vp vice.

Diogynes.

THen lie wynn hate : nor King nor Clowne lie fpare, Yf they with vices vennym poyfned are ; Yf with Prides fwelling tympany I fynd Theire hartes are once puft-vp, He fpeake my mind. Let's pate be crownd with hundred thoufand crownes, Lett cruell deathe fucceed his wrathfull frownes, Yet (yf in him) loathd filthie fynns I fee, Hee fhall not (in them) footh'd-vp-be by mee.

I cannot foothe ; I am not that waies wife ;

Who liveth not in virtue, dies in vice.

Allexander.

THou fayft well, Cynnick, for I hold this race Of oyld-tongu'd flattrers, to be dangerous bafe. The cankerd rust doth not the Iron frett, Soe fafte as thefe doe in good natures eate ; The flatelie oake a longer tyme would Hue, Yf to the Ivie he noe trufte did giue ; But as the Ivie 'boute the oake entwyndes To worke his fall, fo't fares with flattrers mindes.

But whether in difcourfe fhall our tongues walke ? I came not here, of court affaires to talke, I came to fee thy manner kind of life, And t'afke thee why thou getfl thee not a wife. Faith, gett thee one ; I would not lie alone Yf all the world could but afford me one.

Diogynes.

A Wife ? why, for my live I cannot fee Howe man, with woman, euer fhould

When

dogg barkes.

When men goe backward, and goe down the wynd,

It frettes, cuttes, galles, and greiveth fore the mind.

When women backward growe, and downeward goe,

Theire fpleenes with laughter tickles then, I trowe:

Since theire two natures are fo contrarie,

I mufe howe tweene them cann be fympathie.

A wife ? oh fellowe, tha'rt a younge man yet,

Ther'es much fowre fawce belonges to that fweete bitt:

Who would be troubled with the yawling noyfe

Of a harfh-whewling young childes whympring voice;

Againe, to fee them fligger, fmile, and plaie,

Doth make mee greiue as much an other waie.

When they doe fimper, I doe fighe ; for then

I mynd the miferies theyl fee (ere men).

Twould cutt my heart to heare a babe cry 'dadd,

Oh giue me meate,' when tis not to be hadd.

He that doth wiue for pleafures fole intent,

Tis ten to one, but foone he will repent.

Who would be bound to fcrape, pinch, carke, and care

For bra.ttes (perhapps) that gott by others are?

Not I: He' none of this thing cald a wife;

Let him take one that's wearie of his life,

For hee that alwaies will fupplies' wiues lack,

Muft vnto Nature goe, for a fteele back.

A wife? Tie ha noe wife: fuch fprights will frowne

Vnles they (er'e a non) are coinurd' downe :

Againe, my little Tubb is too too fmall

?o hold my wife, my felfe, and whom fhee'le call;

t muft not be a finale howfe that can hold . filent man, ioynd with a fhrill-tongud fchold. owe will hir gofsipps come; then praie nowe, where roome for them to chatt, and make good cheere? nd nowe hir old-acquainted freind will come, (terhapps to fee hir when I'me from my home) then where's my galleree for them to walk? d)r anie place for old freindes fecrett talk ?

.ome what perhapps theyd' doe, I fhould not fee: Where haue I chambers then for them to bee?

Tot in my Tubb : my Tubb hath not the fcope

' or hir to goffip't with hir mates, I hope.

The old

Yet though I haue noe wife (with hott defire)

My harte is flamd : burnt am I with loues fire.

A loue I haue, to whom I will be true :

Obferue hir partes, I will difcribe them you : My loues pure white hath ne're fuflaind a fpot, She's wife, good, rich, faire, chafte. what is fhee not ?

12 3^1 2 ^3

'Ir eyes, grace, f peach ; hath fir* d, amaz'd, rauifkt,

I 2 ' 3 12 3

My harte, fence, thoughts ; with loue, wonder, delight,

123 12 3

Butfyr'd 'mazd, fence-reft; I fought, pray de, and wifht,

123 12 3

To quenche,cure, andheale ; loue, fence, andeyes-dy md fight,

123 12 3

Thus eyes, grace, fpeache; hathfyr'd, amazd, fence-charmd

123 i 23

My thoughts, fence, witts, with loue, withfeare, vnarmd.

Oh my loue's fairlie white without a fpott,

Such is hir hue, no ftaine hir hue can blott.

Virtue's that Dame; in hir fweete grace I fitt,

Tis fhee loues me, fhe'es womans oppofitt. uld I one, headles lymbles corples fee,

To fuch a one would I betrothed be ;

For had fhee nere a head: noe tongue fheed haue,

Nor corps ; then Ide not dread the lechrous knaue :

Nor lymb ; then fhould I neuer quiv'ring ftand,

Fearing my eares remenbraunce of hir hand. Of rope or hangman I was nere afrayde, At noe fight quake I but at wife or maide.

Allexander.

OH harfh-fowre, crabby Cynnick, ftill I fee, To gentle creatures thou wilt ftubborne bee : If with a girle thaft neuer flept a night, Thy foule hath neuer tafted fweete delight. Such is the femall fex, while wife or maide, As of them, too much good cannot be faide, Me thinkes the f kipping bloud (a Virgins grace),

Which

r. J

dogg barkes.

Which tripps lavaltoes in each maydens face, When mens fowle tongues o're-flowes with ribaldery, Should make thee loue maides, for their modeftie.

Dtogynes.

. IV/T Ay dens modeft? what is this modeftie?

Jf *n 1V-1-If t'is in them, it is a vice, faie I,

Vertue in women is as cold as Ice ;

Nothing is warme in them vnleft' be vice.

Thou art a dunce, thou hafte noe reatche, I fee.

Why Maydes at all tymes cann faine modeftee ;

Theil' blufh as oft while they Hue fingle Hues,

As they will weepe when they be marry'd wiues ;

If twas rny Hfte, I could a thowfand name

That would (yf men talke 111) blufh at the fame;

Yet, by themfelues, their tongues fhall nimblie walke

Whole nights togeather, all in too-broad talk.

Allexander.

n^Hou wrongft em foore : I doe not think it, I, *• That maydens tongues will tripp ImmodeftHe.

Diogynes.

ou dooft not, dooft? I prithee think foe ftiU; I think thy witt is like a womans wiU, I jAtt*****^

But what thou dofl not think, I trulie knowe, What I haue faide of maydes, men fhall find foe. I, fellowe, fellowe, till theire by themfelues, Maydes in talke are modeft bafhfull elues, But beinge from the companie of men, The lawes of modeftie is broken then. Twas not longe flnce I flood to maydens neere, But, Lord! thou't ne're beleeue what I did heare, For onelie that fame wench efteemd' was well, Which could the ribauldft dreame relate and tell. I could relate all what they did relate, But that my tongues disvs'd to fuch like prate.

Tis vild obfcene ; fpeake, younge man, wilt you hav't?

C Allexander

The old

Allexander.

COme, out with't, Cynnick, I knowe thy delight Is, all in all to worke faire woomen fpight.

DIOGINES RELATES

the three wanton Sifters wan ton dreames.

Diogynes.

OVer the fyer, once three maydens fatt. Vnknowne to them, I ouer heard their chatt. Eache with hir tuckt-vp cloathes, in pleafing plight (Pleafing I meane vnto fond younge mens fight), Satt ore the fyer, foe as one might fee, From (lender foote, to round-white nimble knee. As thus they fatt, Tme fure thou doefl think what (When maydes with maydens bee) wilbe theire chatt. Girles (quoth the eldeft filter) what {hall's 'doe? Smal'es my defire, vnto my bedd to goe, For yet, I neuer in my couche could fynd A fportiue mate to pleafe my mayden mind. Alas, alas, what pleafure and delight Takes one mayde with an other in the night ? But fmale, god knowes it, for my owne part I Ne're tooke anie with whom I e're did lie. For loue, noe revells in that bedd doth keepe, Where one girle, by an others lide doth fleepe. For trulye (fillers) there is none that can Giue maydes delight in bedd, but a young man, And but in dreame (the more vnhappie I), I ne're with fuch a beddfellowe could He ; But yet in dreame (oh, matchles fweete delightes !) Iv'e lyne, and lyne with one, whole wynters nightes, The greater greife (youl faie) 'twas to my mind When I did wake, and myfelfe fingle fynd. Oh, girles it was ! but, filters, I doe fee,

It

dogg barkes.

It is with eu'rye mayde as 'tis with mee.

Such are our dreames, as wee do laugh in fleepe,

But when wee wake againe, oh, then wee weepe.

But what fhalls' doe? wee'l not foe foone to bedd,

Letts rather tell, howe ne're wee haue beene fpedd.

Our merry'ft dreames come lett vs nowe relate,

Girles gott with girles, their mindes maie freelie prate.

What though w'are maides? heare are noe men to heare vs,

Freelie wee vfe to chatt, when th' are not nere vs.

W'are by our felues ; what ere we talke, is well.

Come, letts drawe lotts which firft hir dreame fhall tell.

At which the youngefl, blufhing like a rofe, Being aflignd by lott firfte to difclofe, Begynns to tell howe to hir foules delight Hir fences ravifht' were, the other night.

THE YOVNGEST

Sifters dreame.

/^\OihJkeet on bedds fofte downe, downe did I lie, )& And fnugd downe clofe, to haue Jleepe clofe eache eye, But ere 7 would lee I entred in a mufe (I, fuch a mufe as all wee may dens ufe), I mufd (me thought] yf there were fweeter blijfe For maydes, then 't lie with men, to clipp and kijfe ; Me thought, I thought (this thought fetcht out a groane) It was a hell to lie all night alone. At which f fight, and turning me I wept, Defiring what I knowe not till I Jlept ; In which my Jleepe (oh fancies fweete delight f] Appeard a youth (Pheobus was much leffe bright) ; Gold were his lo ekes, firye f par kles were his eync, His browes, cheekes, and chynn were as louelie fyne; Pns Jhirte was hee, a Jhirt foe fyne, I wynn. As one might fee what was tweene Jliirt and fkynn, His fnowe-white armes, in-laide with azurdvaine (Mixed with crimfon dye) one might fee plaine ; His full-broade manlic fome-what downy e chejle, Dale-like indented tweene two mounting brejles,

C 2 On

The old

On which two prettie fmiteles teatlinges grewe ; Not milkie fweete, fweete oneliefor the veiwe. I faw's foftfiender wafte; and, fifters, well me I fawe what grew e beneathe his plump-round bellie; All what I fawe (fweete wenches) I would tell ye. But that fweete loue coniures me (here's the fpight] Not to difcribe mans fweetly-fportiue fpright : Oh fweet's the dreame which yeeldeth fuch delight ! But come, girles, come (fye, whether doe I roamef), Me thinkes but coldlie I tooth purpofe come. To me he came, and kijle me too ; when I, Me thought, didfaine I did ajleeping lie; Me thought I lett him kiffe and kiffe agenn, And touche me too (maydes maie be toucht by men). I, Jifters,faythe (me thinkes) that maide's vnwife That will in private, to hir loue be nice; Twofaythfull lovers cannot fynn, I weene, Soe what they doe, by others is not feene. Nowe would the wagg be Jlroaking of my face, And nowe my pappes, anon another place, Delighting of himf elf e; fifters, you can (Better then /) tell what bejl likes a man ; Butfayth-la, girles, I cannot chufe but f mile, I laie as yf I foundlie flept the while, Permitting him to pleafe the appetite Of his too too-fond youth-luft-burning fight ; Fayning I foundeft Jlept, when hee did Jleale To vnhill that which maides Jhould chief ft conceale; But when as hee'd haue come into my bedd, The fear e I had to loofe my maydenhead Awaked me. Quoth thother fifters, what? I hope we may dens leaft of all fear e that. Beleeve me (quoth the elder girle) fiiould I With my fweete-hart on my wedding-night lie, And find him drowfie dull, like heauie lead, Hunting but coldlie for my maydenhead, Twould kill my tender hart: twould murder mce ; The blufhing morne I nere fhould Hue to fee; Oh I fhould fill the roome with groanes : in morne With lookes deiected I fhould feemeforlorne. Biit

dogg barkes.

But when you wakt (quoth Jlie] chaff you not then? Oh noe ! in that cafe maides nere chafe with men. Though wee feeme angry at there boldejl partcs, Yetfeldome comes our anger from our hartes ; For in loues fporte (this is our f exes wylc] We'elfecme tofrowne, when mojl of all we f mile. Yet, fifters, faith (quoth flic] me thought I wept When I did wake, caufe I noe longer Jlcpt, For troth-la, girles, fuch pleafure in't tooke I, As in like dreame twould nere greiue me to die; Had I a world, Id' giu't to learne the fkyll Howe I Jlwuld Jleepe and dreame foe at my will. Had I that arte, that mate hies pleafmg Jlyght, Fewe dates Id'e haue, eache daie Id'e turne to night: Lye downe I would, lulling my felfe a fleepe, Bidding my foule delightfull rev ells kcepe. Slid would I wake, but alwaies by my will I de Jleepe, and dreame, and be embracing. Jlill. Nowe, fecond Jlfter, wake, I praie (quoth fliee], And in your lafte nightes dreame come fecond me.

THE SECOND SI-

fters dreame.

7 He fecond Jifter fome what modcjl bold Reply' d: my dreame par tlie by you is told. Before you Jlept, me thought I heard you faic You in fweete mufmge did a longe tyme laic, You mufmgfigttd, and figh' d till Jleepe did Jlcale Vppon your may den eyes, their lidds to fcalc. At length you Jlept, and dreamt you f awe your loue (A dreame indeed, which much vs maydes doe moue], You kifte with him; but when he'ed with you lie, * That made you wake, and out the bedd to fie. But foe (me thought], fweet fijler, did not I ; For I (me thought] did think it was noe fynn To lett a youth betweene my Jheetes leapt- in, But yet for faJJiions fake oft thus Ide crye,

C 3 Pra>'e

The old

Praye gett you hence, feeke fome where els to lye/ Yet this repulfe fhould ftill foe faintlie come, As it Jhould feircer whett him on for roome; For, coldlie to denie loues fweete delight Spurrs to a gallop the feirce appetite. And, Jifters, well you knowe, we maydes doe hold Thofe youngmen weake which hunt loues chafe btit cold ; What is it to cry, fye, or, praye no we, hence ? Why, to a refolute mynde, that kinde offence Too open lies : oh / men are def prate foes, Vppon advantadge theile come in and clofe. Ide ne're cry, fye, awaie, nor viler this, But I would clofely hugg to him and kiffe. Begone, furceafe, y'are rude ; forbeare, I praie, Of tymes fuch wordes I've gone about to faie, But er"e thofe cruell wordes could haue their birth, Tha'ue f mother d bynn, and all has turnd to mirth. Wagges well knowe howe to quench our angers flame, Sweete kiffes, atfirft kindling, dampe the fame, For (fifters] Loue his fchollers this doth teache, Wee ioyne fliould lippes, to feale our lipp's from f peach, And foe it far d with vs; fpeachles we laie, Giving to pleafures fweetned Jlreame free waie. Soe longe (me thoiighl) we dally' d in the bedd, As allmoft I had loft my maydenhead; But (girles} I curfe Drea.mesfatfe deluding guile, As I was loojlng it, I wakt the while. Oh girles / oh girles / who knowes what I did miffe f For I awakt in midft offweetefl bliffe ; If euer mayde toucht Nettar with her lipp, Then I (in dreame] of that fweet iuyce did Jipp. Biit oh, I wakt ! oh then (awakt} my fpight, For being wakt, afleepefell all delight.

Nowe, eldeft Jlfter, you muft wake (quoth Jhee), Your turne's to tell the next dreame after me. And reafon to, the eldejl Jiftter fayde, Elfe let on me fomeforfeyture be laide, Biit I muft tell the dreame you haue told twice, Vnles I fhould fome fayned dreame devife. Were here more then flue hundred maydes, yet each

Of

dogg barkes.

Ofvs, Jhould in one text and leffon preache, For all we maydes doe dreame alike a nights ; Then to our eyes appear eth pleafing fights, And then a f mack we tajle 0/" loues delights ; Oh that Dame Nature would but hcare my fute, Then Jhould our may den bodies bear noefruite ; Or would it were noe fcandall to our Hues To haue our pappes giue fucke, er'e married wiues ; If with that pleajing graunt, we maydes were blejl, Then foner would we yield to loues requejle, For a my fayth, girles, were it notforfeare To be with childe, Id'e ne're denie my Deare. Oh then thefefalfe dreames fond deluding Jightes Weed ne're care for ; we'ed tajle loues tfuft delights. More then tenn thowfand tymes, Ive thought to pyne This mallenchollie fullen corpes of myne, For Jild (alas) we maydes can tajle fweet loue But our owne bellies doe the tell-tales proue, With fullen puft-up pride alowde they reade, Proclayming publickelye our private deed; Hap pie are wiues, for they are nere afraide Of that which terryfyeth mojle a maide ; They maie haue boyes and girles, and boies agen, They maie with hufbands lie, and other men, Yet nothing noted; but alas, poore we Sild dare doe ought but what the world maie fee ; Eache thinge itfelfe againjle vs doth oppofe, Allthinges are blabbes, our fecrets to difclofe. For Jild we reape loues pleafure in the night, But envious date (tdur Jhames] bringes it to light, Shewing too plaine at what game we haue beene, Making our fweetlie Jlolen pleafures feene. Oh were it not for dreames, I wonder, I, Howe we in bedd a night es could brooke to he. But come, lett thefe things paffe; eyther of you Your dreames haue told, my dreame beginneth nowe.

C4 THE

The old

THE ELDEST SI-

fters dreame.

OH ' (fijlers] know e you, to my raviftit fight My loue with's amber locks appear d lajle night, Bold boie, boldlie hee came as fear d of naught, Shewing in what fchoole hee his f kill was taught. Scarce f peaking ought at all '; yf 'ought, twas this, Where's my Gerle f fmothering that too with a kiffe, Nor with his kiffing fpent hee all the night; Tutt (girles] our paftime yeelded more delight. I dreamt it did doe foe, for you mujl knowe I did but onelie dreame it did doe foe ; To loues embracementes wee (me thought} fell then, But loues fweete game is coldlie chafte by men. Yet our f ex workes loues labor eitrye date With mindes as willing as men goe to plaie. I girles, I girles, I fpeake in heate of bloude, Men too too foone are tyr'dwith doy ing good; But oh, deare girlis (fuch is our f exes kind] One man maie pleafe vs all, except our mind, For yf one man content one woman cann, Then why Jkould it not be this youthfull man ? His vaines werefidl, foe Jlronge a back hee had As Herculis to him was but a ladd; Yf youth and Jlrength 'tis, quencheth womans fire Then 'twas in him, as much as Ide defire. But 'tis not Oceans of that liquid fluff Which lyes in youthful/I men, that is enough To quench the mindes outragious frying fiame, For that once ty^nd, age onely dampes the fame. Manie a woman 'till Jhee hath tr'yd twoo, Diftafteth all hir firfie fweetehart doth doe ; From whence praie comes 7/foz/Lufte, that fowre-fweetf mart? Oh, tti ead of that fame fpr ing es, a divelifk harte. But whether from my text am I nowe fied? My dreame was this, I lofie my may den head.

To

I

dogg barkes.

To that let me retourne : oh, tis delight Vnto vs maides, to think but on that night. Him fweene my armes one while I did infold, Another while, he me, 'tweene his would hold ; Entwindinge leggs (me thought) with me he laie, While I, withs curled locks, did fporte and p laie. Soe longe plaide we as, Jijlers, well I wijfe, Our f port es extended further then to kiffe. Soe longe I kifte, Joe longe oris looks Ifedd, As f lire in dreame I lojle my maydenhead. But (Jifters) was it in my pow're to choofe, Thenfuch a loffe Id'e eu'ry my nut e loofe, For when we maydes doe lofe our may den treafure, Oh, by that lofse we wynn a world of plcafure. Fayth, Girles, maydes cannot think what fwect delight \ Two loners take which warr in loues feirce fight ; \ To them, loathfoiris the date, ouer the night. But nowe I Jig he, nowe doe I greiue to think e That, that night my eye-lides did euer wynke, For when I wakt (oh dreames / oh dreames, y'are theeucs f) And mijl my loue, ludge then (girles] ofmygreeues! Oh, had I had tenn worldes, I would haue than Gev'n all thofe worldes (fweete girles] for halfe a man. Men fluffs their chefles as full as they can hold With cramttd-truft bagges of aungell-winged gold : But what to doe? for footh, to by this land. Oh, would I had that dicft of Tagus flrand, Ide not buy land or howfes with it, I, For other merchandize Ide make itjlie; Had I fuch laden truncks, this Ide doe than, For eury night itft yeare Ide buy a man. For, Jifters, I maiefpeake to you my mind, When I awakt, and lookt my loue to find, Feeling for 's neck, to clafpe that neck of his, For's ruddy lipp, hoping that lipp to kijfe, For's wanton legg,for myne with that Pyntwind,

And Jifters for , oh girles, you knowe my mind,

When for thefe louelie thinges I fearcht to fc<\

D But

The old

But could not find, where thofe fweet things might be:

With bitter pafjlon, I burft out and cryd,

Wifkinge, within my mothers wombe Id'e dy'd.

Oh Jijlers ! oh fweete Jijlers, then did I

Wifkefatall Death attache me injlauntlie. Nowe did I ftare aboute; nowe did I call; But when noe aunfwere I could heare at all,

Vp in my f mock I rofe, and fear cht each place (Oh girles, extreames our f ex, in louesfweete cafe], Groping behind eache trunck, feeling vnder bedd, Me thought for him which had my maydenhead: And of t Ide crye, fweete wagg, thy f elf e difclofe, For Iv'e another maydenhead to loofe. But when noe anfwere I could heare, oh then,

Weeping, I Jigtid and went to bedd agen,

Where, one while tumbling that waie, other this, Nowe Jhould I Jighe, nowe my poor e pillow e kiffe, Entwinding it betweene my armes embrace, Ide hugg't as yf my deare duck were in place, Fayning (in that my frying pafjions flame} I hottlie chafte lottes fweetft delightfull game. But when I found my fence deluded foe, My pafjions heate, to coldnes then didgrowe, For myfjing himjgrewe more cold then Jlone ; Oh't paynes my heart to telt; come, letfs be gone. Soe vp they rofe; but er'e they went, I rufht From where I ftood, at which the wantons bhiftit.

Nowe, fir, I hope you fee what modeft chatt Young maydes will haue when by themfelues theire gott. Graues fwallowe them : were all dead, I'de be gladd ; The beft of wiues, or maides, are worfe then badd.

Allexander.

, come, Diogenes, although thofe three private mirthe exceeded modeflie, Yet you doe 111 t' accufe foe gennerall ; Caufe one is badd, therefore mufl they be all ? In foe concludinge, very 111 you doe ; Noe man foe gen'rallie concludes, but you.

Diogynes.

dogg barkes.

Diogynes.

A Nd by your leaue, fir, Il'e conclude foe ftill, -^Where one of them is good, tenn thowfand's 111. What I haue faide, I will re-faie agen, Wer't not for them, oh, bleffed were we men ! Into vs men, they eate as ruft and moathes Eates into Iron, and the fyneft cloathes. Thou feeft this riv'led hollowe-eyd face of mine : Thoudft little thinke it has been decl-vp fyne, And tricklie trym'd-vp in a womans guife, Onelie to dive into their knaueries. But duft thou heare (I fpeake it to their praife), I haue a mary'd wife beene in my daies, At leaftwife like one, for th'eile yet confeffe, They once tooke old Diogines for noe leffe : Noe butned dublett, on my back I bore, A gowne downe to my heeles (wif-like) I wore, And fuch attire, this head of myne did beare As mary'd wiues in thofe daies vfd to weare. Then to my chynn, noe briflye haires were knowne ; Nay't had not entertayned anie downe, But twas foe foft, foe fleek, as each man fayd When I paft by, there goes a wife or maide : My curled locks hang in a careles guize, With which the wynd did plaie in wanton wife. Like to a wanton I was trymlie dreft, But why I was foe, there confifts the ieft.

Allexander.

\ 1 7Hy waft thou foe ? I pry thee, Cynnick, tell : W Till thou haft told it, I fhall nere be well.

Diogynes.

then be 111 : in footh 'tis not my lifte To make thee laughe, for I'me a Satyrift.

D 2 Againe

The old

Againe thy companie, I doe brooke foe 111, As I would haue thee gone, had I my will.

Allexander.

, tel't mee then, and inftantlie fhalt fee will departe, and gett me hence from thee.

Diogynes.

that condition I will telt : why, knowe, was the caufe I went difguifed foe. The Dames si Athens, merrye wenches be, And vnto meetings, giv'n are much, you fee ; To gofip't with them I did long time longe, To heare the verdid of each womans tongue, For well knewe I, when wines are gott with wiues, There's tryalls to be heard, of hufbands Hues ; Falfe accufations, cruell ludgments then (Vnmercy fullie) paffe vpon poore men, To heare all which (tooth hazard of my life) I tooke on mee the habitt of a wife. And well I womand it when I did walk ; But when at table, I were fett to talk, Then did my tongue betraye me, for I trowe It prou'd a lade in pace ; t' was dull and Howe ; I mumping fatt ; I could not for my life Make my tongue gallopp like a marry'd wife. Twas caufe I lackt theire arte to fpur it vp Euer anan with a full fugerd' cupp. Yet wiud I it the beft that I could doe, )

And nowe and then raild on my hufband too. > But marke mee nowe, nowe to my tale I goe. ]

The Cynnycks difcription of the manner

of womens goffypping.

AS at our meate we fatt, twas hard to knowe •*•*• Whether our teeth, or tongues, didfajlejl goe.

At

dogg barkes.

At tables vpper end in cheifejl place

Satt maddam Will, in reeling drunken cafe;

Light in atire fliee was ; Jhees womens god,

They hir truefubietts bee: but flie'es mans rodd.

Nothing by Will at anie tyme is faide,

But is by wiues and widdowes Jlill obayd.

Wills Oration,

S^Vbiettes, quoth maddam Will, I here am fett ^ Not alltogeather to fe how e you eate, Nor came I whollie to participate With this your freelie-fpoken merry e prate, But chiejlie why amongjl you nowe I come, Is, to knowe howe eache wife fares in hir home, Howe by hir hufband fliee is dailie vfd, Whether Jhe'es well-entreated, or abufd; Therefore yf anie of you fufer greife, Know't I am Will, and will yeild you releife. Be bold to fpeake, I am the wiues delight, And euer was, and wilbe, th'ufbandes fpight. II' e Jitt as ludge vppon thefe wicked men : Doe you accufe, and II' e giue fentence then.

The old wiues complaynt againfte hir younge hufband.

A T which old Crona, with hir redd-bleare eys, \ *± From of the Jloolejhe fatt, did ftraytewayes rife, > And out aloude, to Will,/?/- iujlice cryes. }

Quothefke, my fou'raygne Queene, 'tis not with tongue I able am t* expres my day e lie wronge. Three hufbandes haue I had; two old, in truth, But they the cropping had of my greene youth, In lewe of which (to think on V nowe I' me f add) They left me all the goodes and gold they had. With Cattell (loSd-was all my pajlure growndcs,

D 3 With

old

Withfyne woold bleating fkeepe my hilly e downes. Cra/mVd was my barnes, my chejle with in' I did hold Manie a Princes picture in puere gold; And while they liv'd, that thing was wondrous fkant That Crona euer did fpeake-for and want : Then in wealthes pleafures I did fwymm and float e. But out, alas, that e're old fooles fhould doate, For fine e their e deathes (oh Queene, If peak 't with ruth!] Fond-foolifh I fett my loue on a youth, Making him maijler and poffeffor quite (hi hope heedy doe to mee all true loues right] Of all the golden goodes I were poffeft A nd left-with, by their e foules, which nowe doe rejle. But (aye me, Caytif] neuer wretched I Vntill this tyme knewe what was miferie. Oh, nowe Ifynd, this is the fweeter life, To be an old mans nurfe, then a youths wife. For's loue I wedded him, but he aboue Doth onelie knowe, who doth enioie his loue. My bed hee loathes ; hee neuer giues me kis But hee cries, wife, reward my loue for this ; For yf ' young e men old wiues one kis affordes, Tis for the loue th'aue to theire golden hordes. Without I buy his loue, heel lye all night In fullen wife, and dif contented plight, Not once foe much as turning vnto me, Vnles a golden lure his eyes doth fee. And nowe, greate goddes 'Will, for loues intent Soe longe I brib'd him haue, as all is f pent, And I am caft-of; wherefore lett me craue, That gainft him, publick fentence I maie haue.

At which fame per iodd, all the wittles route

In her behalf e vnto dame Will cryd' out.

Dame Wills Sentence.

, quoth Will, well has thy fluent tongue Exprejl with paffion thy too greate a wronge.

The

dogg barkes.

The fentence I pronounce againjl that wight Is this : thou Jhalt torment him daie and night With that fame poyfned injlrument of thyne, I meane thy tongue ; then Jhalt thou fe, infyne, Howe defpratelye, to hang himfelfe he'ele gadd, Or els, howe foone he will proue braine-Jlck madd. My fentence is, at noe tyme thou fhalt reft, But with thy tongue torment him ftill thy befte. Infeilde, in bedd, at borde, in eache place ftill Ide haue thee ftyng him with thy bitterft fkill, Call him vp-ftart, bafe fcumm, the worft ofworft; Afk him who made him, and who raifd himfirftef Tell him, e're thou mettft with him, hee did lacke Shoes for 's feete, hofe for's leggs, and cloathes for's back ; Such peales at all tymes ring thou in his eare. It is my fentence ; doo V, and doe not fear e. To doe that heft, awaie did Crona trudge, Praijlng dame Will, for a mofte vpright fudge.

The younge wifes complaint againft

hir ieolous headed old

hufband.

T.

"Hat wrinckle-faced drudge noe fooner gone, But in hir place ftraight ftept-vp fuch a one As matchles was in bewties pleafing grace ; One who exceld loues mother in the face. Men call her Youtha: oh, greate queene, quoth Jhee, \Since woemens wronges thou rightft, then right thou mee. \My couetous parents (not to Natures kinde] I Vnto an old man matcht me, 'gainfte my minde. ! For -tie fuch men, unable are to quenche / The firye flames tyrid in a luftfull wenche. \ When burning Lufle wtth's violent J "cor 'tc hing fire Hath fing'd my harte with pajfions feirce dcfire, Then in Loues chafe I hunt, for in Loues game Remayneth that which quencheth Lufts hott flame.

D 4 But

The old

But, tweene an old mans armes, what's there to quench f Still flares the flames, ty'nd in a youthfull wench. Yet yf that Jhiu' ring coldnes, heate allaies, Then that in old men fliall we find alwaies ; As we are extreame hott, foe Jlill are they Extreame in that fame cold extremytee. But \Q\\&$>feircefire, with fire muft quenched be, 'Ells Jlill the more it burnes : fo 't fares with me. For 'las, when luft hath heate me, I cann find His cold embrace, noe quencher of my mind. My parents might haue matcht me to one dead, As well as to a f apples old mans bedd; I cann fmale diffrence make, for men, onc\e\ old, Like dead men laye ; oh, th'are corruptly cold. Rug' d-wrinckled is his face; his head in fliowe Seemes like a hillock, hild with milk white f now e ; His hitmors heauier then f add mafjie lead, His leggs like Ificles doe warme my bedd; Noe Jlgne of heate is in this aged fire, 'Les in his nofe, but that refembles fire. What fliall I faie, ther'es none, that doth him fee, But faies, the piflure of cold winte'rs he; Yet I (oh mojl vnequall matche!} alas, Enforfte to wedd with this cold dotard was, With whom (greate Queene) I fuch a life doe leade As I eache mynute wiflie my felfe were dead. Soe hath his aged difabillitie Poffeffed him with this feende leolofie, As I cann noe waies goe from fight ofs' eyes, But ftraitewaies after me he fendes his f pies; Nor cann I talke with ante, but in 's head Arrifethfome conceipte, II' e wrong his bedd. Let but a trech'rous doore in night once creake, Then Jlraight he doubles, ther'es fome with me would f peak e Confrence with near eft kinn1 heel not allow e, Fearing we plott, to breake our weddlock vowe. Which god he knowes (greate Queene] my f pottles mind, That waies, as yet, hath neuer beene inclynd. 1 Orig. knin. Smyle

dogg barkes.

Smyle I, or weepe I, all is one ; for hee Of who? t foe eyre I doe, will ieolous bee : Ifldoefmyle, then f ayes he Jlraight, We had Sport with my loue ; tis that makes me foe gladd. If I am fadd, then doth heefaie hee knowes The fpring from whence my mallan chollie flowes, Vpbraydinge me, Pme onelie fadd for this, Becaufe my loue, ofhisfett how're did mijfe. Suche is a griflie old mans fair e wiues' ftate, As ieolous-headed he will deeme Jhe'el hav't, Though ouer hir hee fetts a thouf and f pies, And eu'ryefpie, an Argus is,for's eyes; Therefore, fine e (cau/les) he doth wrong me foe, Teache me revenge againft this loathed foe.

Giue fentence (Queene) what fliall bee done by me

Againfte him in revenge o/'s ieolofee.

Dame Wills fentence in the young

wifes behalf againft hir old

hufband.

"VTOutha, quoth maddam Will, with greate reguard •*• Haue I, this thy fadd information heard, And doe bewaile the fame ; but lie1 haue thee Plague thy old hufband for his Ieolofee. Yet leolous-headed men noe plagves doe neede, For in themfelues fufficient plagues doe breede. For looke, in what place lealojie doth dwell, There are the tormentes of an earthlie hell. Yetjincefor naught, he doubts foe fair e a dame, Thusjhalt thou jling and torture him forth' fame. Infecrett wife He haue thee Jlaine his bedd, And graft fair e guilded homes orisfilverd head. Such glorious fpriggs foe well in noe place growes As in the rivaled furrow es of an old mans browes. Thou art a woman, therefore can/I not want At all tymes f kill, fuch fetts and grafts to plant.

E

The old

My fentence is, thou Jhalt him foe beguua, As make him thinke he's1 father to that chii>a Which thou thy f elf e know ft not who it begott. To gather goodesfor whom, Jhall tti old drtidge trott, Not /paring night nor date, tilVs life be done, Howe to f crape wealth, to giue another s fonn ; And caufe thy parents for ft e thee to his bedd, Thus will I haue thy parents punniflied. Thou Jhalt, vnto their e fkar let blujhing Jhame, Befpott them with the f potts of thy ftaind name, Soy ling thy wedding flieetes, fair e Pwy white, Withfowle black f potts of fait lufts loathd delight.

Bewteous Youtha, my fentence nowe is done,

See that on (hem the'res execution.

The goffipping wiues complaint

againft hir riche churlifhe

hufband.

His fentence giv'n, the whole route 'gann to rife, But pert quicke-tongued Goffippa (whofe eyes Contaynd of brynniflie teares a criftall fluude) Starts-vpp, and praies Dame Will, to hir be good. Of all thy louing fiibiefts I (quoth JJiee) Haue euer yet beene found fay thfulft to thee, And therefore, my good Queane, let me acquainte Thy gentle eares with one petition plainte.

Binges I loue ; two vfuall thinges they are : fir fie, newe-fajhiond cloathes I loue to weare, Newre tires, newe ruffes, JL, and newe gejiurejoo ; In all newefafliions I doe loue to goe.

e fecond thing I loue, is this, I weene, Toria^e ubviite1 Id hdUe'thd)& newe cioatnerfeene ; At^eu*ry<> gfilkppwg T q{^($ Jlill^ Andvuer wilbe, maie I haue my will, For at ons owne howfe, praie, who ifl cannfee Howefyne in newe found fafltond tires wee beef

his. Ynles

dogg barkes.

Vnles our hufbandes? faithe, but very ef ewe. And whoo'd goe gaie to pleafe a huf bands veiwc? Alas, we wiues doe take but f male delight, Yf none (peftde our hufbandes)fe'es that fight. It ioyes our heartes, to heare an other man Praife this or that attire that wee weare on. Wee iocond are, and thinke our fe lues much grafte, Yfwe heare one fate, faire wenche, faithe, in wafte This ftraight-girt gowne becomes you palling well ; From other Taylors, yours doe beare the bell: Oh, hee that well cann atte-out fuch fweete partes, Throwes-up the lure which wynns our verye hartes. When we are ftubborrift, then let men with fkill Rubb'es well with th'oyle of praife, and bend we will; That fmoothe-fyne fupple oyle doth f of ten vs foe, As what ift then we will not yeild vnto? Meetinges and brauerye were my delight: Thofe were the two: but (greate queene) he' res the fpight Without greate Jlore of wealth be dailie gainde, Of all delightes, thofe are the worfte maintaind; And therefore I did alwaies plott in mind Howe, a wealthie riche huf band, out to find, And one I've gott: but fuch a churle is hee, As fear ce a penny will beftowe on mee; And thatjhall neuer come, but (fore I ha'te) The miferable clowne, will f cratch his pate, Alwayes demaundinge what with V 1 'will doe, And then comes out, her'es fuch a ftir with you. A man had better ridd-be of his life, Then clog'd with fuch a fydling foolifh wife. Such are his tauntes, when I demaund him ought, As what I gettfrom him is dearelie bought. I cannot groff lie feed, for I in footh Haue a tender mawe, and a daintie tooth. Thefe beeues and muttons are but homeliefare, My appetite doth thirjle-for what's mojl rare: Had I vnto my mind, then I would eate Still of the fyneft pallat-pleafing meate.

The old

Butfye on hogges! oh ! there is none Hues, Hues Soe ftraung\e\lie hatefull as thefe rich churles wives , For yf I cannot gnaw e a hard dry e crufte, Manie a daie, fafte-out the tyme I mufte. lujie like to Tantalus it fares with mee, For what I hunger-for, I alwaies fee. All what againjl him Id'e to faie, Ive faide: Nowe queene, I doe ymplore thy counfells ayde. I cannot goffipp it nor cann goe trymm, Caufe I want arte, to worke coine out from him. Tailing Goffippa here-at holdes hir tongue, With praying maddam Will to right her wronge. Silence beinge made, thus dame Will replies.

Wills fentence vppon the rich churle.

, quoth fhee, Iv'e heard thy Iniuries ; And yf they all bee true which I did heare, Then are they too too much for thee to beare, For to vs women thefe thinges are mofte III, J" abate our prides, and to rejlraine our will. If hee bee riche ; his barnes are full of graine. Where hee one bufhell fells, fell thou Jlill twaine ; His fwyne, fheepe, geefe, henns, ducks, doe thou convaie, I, fell his very fhirtes, but goe thou gaie ; Of all men, hee vnworthy'ft is of life That will not, lafte of all, mijlrufte his wife. A night es, faile not but pick the churles jluft purfe : Yf hee doth f ware, I hope thy tongue cann curfe, But yf his barnes, purfe, yarde, and all doe fay le, Then to th! old vfe put thou thy nimble tayle; Lett that worke for thee', for by that fame waie Ther'es manie a woman makes hir f elf e [go\ gaie. That waie thou maifte the fupple fattins ware, That waie thou maifte feed, on thee^ dainty1 ft fare ; Yf noe waie elfe thou canfte make thy felfe trymm, Then that waie, tis my will, thou punnifh him.

1 orig. then. Wkoo'd

dogg barkes.

Whoo'd fweate and toy le for this fame golden treafure, When one maie gett it with the fweetejl pleafure. Thou knowft my minde; Goflippa, doe it then: \^Faire wenches cannot want, while there are men.

Diogynes makes himfelf

knowne.

AT th'end of which fame fentence all arose, Where-at my felfe to them I did difclofe; But er'e I did it, I did gett to th' 1 dore, For, had they caught me, they'd haue vfd me fore. To hold me, eu'rye woman out did crie, But, being out theire reache, awaie rann I; Gladd that Id'e feene and heard theire knauerye.

Nowe, fir, Ive iuftlie told, for what intent I, /ike a woman, amongft women went. Yf you on theire behalfes haue ought to faie, Sait'e fome where elfe, or gett you hence awaie.

Allexander.

TO what thaft' faide, fmale creditt I cann giue, For I can neuer made-be to beleeue, That creatures halfe devine .for glorious bewtie, Should foe refpedles be to man in dutie. Thinges eu'rye waie foe perfect faire in fhowe, In virtues, fullie perfed are, I knowe.

Diogynes.

THou knowft it, dooft? awaie, thou art an elfe, What canft thou knowe, that knoweft not thy felfe? The golden-fkaled fnake's a louelie thinge,^ Had not that glorious worme a poyfned ftinge; Of maides and wiues noe barrell better bee ; Would God made none, but what were 'fpoke of mee.

, A E i Allexander.

1 Ong. to'oth. " 3

*he old

Allexander. "\ yl 7Hy, prithee fpeake ; howe manie wouldft haue then ?

Diogynes. one halfe girle, tenn hundred thowfand men.

Allexander.

fie vppon thee, Cynnick, why doil bite, And fett foe pure a thing as woman, light ? I am a fhamd' of thee ; doe what I can, I cannot think thou art a perfect man. I doe beleeue that thou at noe tyme hafte That manlie heate, which caufeth man to wafte. Thou art noe man ; for, we'rt a man, I'me fure A woman's companie thou couldft endure. But faie, thou wert enforft vppon they life To take thee to fome one to be thy wife, What kinde of woman-creature wouldft thou chufe, Yf it were foe thou mightft' it not refufe.

Diogynes.

BY hanginge, Ide chufe rather end my life Then Id'e a woman haue, to be my wife. But were it foe, that one I needes muft haue, And that I had noe waie my felfe to faue, Then all the world Ide' feeke,' but I would fynd A woman for my "jfr^iTT1^ H^fp attd K1Tf1fi Beiides, yf I coulcTpofsiblie prevaile, Ide feeke the world, for one without a taile. Moft men, in bodie wafted are by wiues ; But fuch, I'me fure, would proue reftoritiues.

Allexander.

dogg barkes.

Allexander.

, man ; why what in woman dooft thou fee, That they foe much diftaftefull are to thee ?

Diogynes.

"MTOe more then thou maifte fee, yf th'art not blind, A -*• ^ Why mofte of them hudge gyantes are for minde. Pride keepes hir faire in eache faire wantons face, And Lujle keepes in theire tayles hir markett place. Revengefull Wrath theire furious tongues doth fwaie, From labor, drowfie Sloath their handes doth ftaie, En fyns fweete-poyfned luyce drunken theile be, And Envie others, drunken foe to fee. What fee I not in them ? they are the Inns Wherein doth lodge thofe monftrous murdring fynns.

Allexander.

Fie, Cynnick, thou dofte blowe too bitter aire On tender bloffoms, which are fweetlie faire.

Diogynes.

"\7T fhee be faire, and a fharpe-witted one, *• And honefte too ; a Phenix fhe'es alone. Who hath tenn Herculeffes flrengths in's loines, And with a faire, fharpe-witted wanton loyns, Shall be affurd, the home on's browe to fynd. Whoo'l quench a wantons lufte, mud quench the mind; Th'are proude; eache wench would bee an Allexander, And by hir will, ouer a world commaunder. But yf not proude, nor luftfullie inclind, Then eyther foole, or fcold, of hir fhalt fynd. Eyther of them, mans patience foe would alter, As they would make him flraight make vfe ath halter. They are all naught, I cannot brook em, I

Would

The old

Would I were Deathe, then women all fhould die.

Allexander.

TVTAie, fie, Cynnick, thou railft too gennerall, •*• ^ Thou mufte not, for fome fewe, condemn em all ; Thou talkft, as yf thou wert noe womans fonn ; I would th'adst trauaild but as I haue done ; Although th' Athenians givn are to theire will, And Hue a life difplealinge (hatefull ill), Yet fince my travaile (whereas I haue beene), Aboundance vertuous women I haue feene.

Diogynes.

OH, ya'r a trauaylier ! praie, are you foe ? Where you haue beene, black fwanns you haue feene too. Good trauayler, the hearinge I will giue you, But you fhall giue me leaue not to beleeue you.

Women are naughte : Il'e talk noe more with thee ; And therefore naught, becaufe women they bee.

Allexander.

OH, ftraung ! yf Allexander heard but thee, For womens fakes (I'me fure) thou'dft punnifht be.

Diogynes.

e, telt' him, goe; I doe as little care For him as thee ; let both doe what you dare. Tell me of him ? I feare him not a flie ; I dread not might, Diogynes am I. Hees but a man ; Il'e ne're fawne for mans grace ; What I haue faide, Il'e boldlie faye too's face. And wer't, he were as badd as women bee, Id'e bite the monnark to his face ; fhouldfl fee.

Allexander.

dogg barkes.

Allexander.

TTE knowes thou wouldft, in that I knowe the fame, -L J-For I am hee ; for this caufe here I came, To heare thy wittie bluntnes, and to fee Whether thy fayings and thy deedes agree. Come, Cynnick, burne this tubb, and followe me, And vnto noble titles He raife thee.

Diogynes.

rTAHou wilt ; but I will not ; none can raife me ; •*• I'me in my tubb as greate a King as thee.

Who holdes the world and it's vaine trafh for flight,

He trulie conquers it ; giue him his right.

And foe doe I: therefore, hudge Allexander,

I hold my felfe (ath twaine) the greatft commaunder.

I will not begg to rule and governe landes;

Onelie thy abfence, He begg at thy handes.

I prethee pack thee hence, and gett thee gone ;

The companie ftill is beft, where is but one.

Goe, feeke thee out an other world to wynn,

And putt the women of this world therein ;

But let that world be farr enough ; and then

Learning and virtue will encreafe with men.

Naught elfe I haue to begg ; graunt but this fuite, Then henceforth euer fhall my tongue reft mute.

FINIS.

AN

AN APOLOGIE.

YOu choycefte creatures, (you which god did take Prom-out mans f elf , mans comforter to make) Difcomfort not your felues, nor be difmayd At what a dogged Cynnick here hath fay de. What though fowre-churlif he-he (too currifh blynde] Hath barkt too broadly e gainfte your gentle kind, Yet little doth fuck clouds keepefrom our fights Your fhynninge virtues, this worldes fplendanntst lights. Happlye his gaily vennym'dfpeech proceeds As grounded by felf-doyinge divelifhe deedes. Dead is the dogg, I hope, and for your f ex The fpirritts doth his fpirritt hottlye vex. Excufe my worke, it paints the Cynnick forth, And to the wife it nothinge Jlaines your worth.

FINIS.

A MORRALL SATIRE

yntituled the Owles araygne- ment.

Henfowles could talke with reafon like to men, This accident amongjl em happend then ; Before the Prince offowles the Owle was brought To aunfwere why f he did things lawles naught : 'Hir adverfaries were the batt, the thrufh, With others moe : who night' lie in the bufh Shee eyther fcard with fkreeking fearefull cries, Or fodeynlie (ere wake) did them furprize ; Wherefore they apprehending hir did craue That they againjl hir might iujle luftice haue. Greate Prince, quoth they, to death put thou this Owle, She is a vildlie living wicked fowle : Vnfitt to Hue: all daie fhee fleepes ; a nightes Smale birds fhee kills ; the befl and great/I f he frights, Breaking our quiet fleepe with her fell noyfe Of manlike lure and yauling-w hooping voice; And therefore, fou'raigne Prince, wee all doe craue, Since fhee deferveth death, death fhe mate haue. The Eagle ft ernlie mild putt them ajide, Commaunding filens thus the Eagle cryd: Come forward, Owle, and free thy hart from feare, Speakefreelie, bird, true iujlice I doe here\ Before my f word of iujlice Death doth Jlrike, TK accufer and tti accufd I hear e alike ; Bribes nor affettion maks my clear e eys blind, And thereforefreeliefearlesfpeak thy mind. When ttt owle did hear e this mild f peach of hir Lord, Couradg fhee tooke in gejlure and in word. C hearing hir f elf e, fhee thus tooth Eagle cryes : Impartlall iujlice comes from Maiejlies,

F 2 And

The Owles

And Jince your highnes doth thus daine to heare My caufe your f elf e ; my caufe I little fear e. For what need I, quoth fhee, dread anie thing, Being my caufe is heard before my King f Let murdrers quake when lujlice f hakes hir rodd, The lujl nerefeares the Judgment of luft god. Noe more will I, Jince freelie plead I mujl (In guiltles caufes] before a King foe iuft. Two accufations are againft me layde ; To be a murdrer is thefirft I'me fayde, Thefecond is that I in fy lent night With manlike voice f male birds andfowles af right. Great Prince, I both confes ; butfirfte lie f how e The caufe and reafon which makes mefkreckfoe; A nightes I hollowing whoop and wondring crye, But, gratious Prince, this is the reafon why.

In eache place I doe fee proude Babells built,

With cloude-braving turretts daubd-tfre with guilt.

With in thofe Babells I doe peepe to fpie

The princelie prefence of your maieftie, But when in Jleed of you (on bedd offtrawe) I fee that tailing bird, the lack-adawe,

With admiration then awaie I flie, Then lo ho ho, then wo ho ho crye I.

Sometimes I daringlie prefume to peepe Within your Court when all your courtyers fleepe, Where when I fee the prating parratt grac'd, And birdes of better worth for him difplac'd, . Or when I fee the plumy peacocks pride To ftriue to lie by1 s fou' raigne Princes Jide, And fe the "valiant Cock with fwaines to Hue, That.Jlght much wonder to my eyes doth giue. With admiration then awaie I flie, Then lo ho ho, then wo ho ho crie I.

Sometimes I flie ore Neptunes glaffte foile To veiwe the fhipps of our fea-girt-in lie,

But

Araignement.

But when I fee howe nakedlie they bee, Howe like they are tooth winter-fhaken tree, And howe from them all braue fea birds are fledd, Then like a malecontent I hang do wne head. With admiration then awaie I flie, Then lo ho ho, then wo ho ho crie I.

Sometimes ore fto'nd-paud Citties I take flight, Where to my night-clear d eyes admired fight I fee the Cuccoe build in houfe his neajle, Which ere was wont to be Silvanus guefte; Bafelie brooking each cock-fparrowes rwalrye, Suffrings mate for trafh to bath in brothelry. A nights, fuch fights prefented to my eye, Makes me with wonder, wo ho ho to cry.

This is the caufe, greate Prince, why in the night I wonder foe ; nowe where they doe indight Me for a murtherer : your grace f hall flnd I'me leafte of all your nobles foe inclind; Gui\J\tles I plead; or yf 1 guiltie be, With me muft die your whole nobility. Your Hawkes (dread four aigne Prince] doe dailie kill, And dailie doe devoure, eate-vp, and f pill Your honeft fubietts, yet theres not a taint Laies hold of them; 'gainjl them the' res noe complaint. Greate-peares nere to Princes fhould not doe foe ; By their Jlepps we track which waie Kings doe goe. As Phebes light from Phebus doth proceed, Soe doth a great Lords aftfroms Princes deed. Yf Kings encloudwith vice their Virtues funn. That f elf e thick-foggy e courfe their peeres will runn. Yf I doe murther, they doe murther too; What waie I goe, that waie your hauks mujl goe, Elfe, gratious Prince, your lawe giiies waye and place To fuch as are, or are not in your grace. Elfe greate ones open maie your mercy es doore, Sucking the fatt from men but meanlie poore, Iniuftly wronging poore-poore vnderlings

F 3

The Owles

For pettie crymes: when, vnder your owne wings,

Far fowler acts within themfelues they nurrifh,

And confciensles, the vildeft dambd things cherrifh.

But foe it fhould not be, my fouraigne King;

For from a Kingdoms lawes cleere chrijlall fpring,

Alike all ftreames fhould runn: I, eu'ry where

That fhould fpoute water vncorruptlie cleare.

Let it doe foe, my Prince: let poor e mans cryme

Be iudgd like their es: w'are made of felf-like Jlime.

All kings are earthlie gods; therefore fhould Kings

In an impartiall ballance weigh all thinges.

The iujleft iudge doth foe; and foe fhould you,

Like that corruptles iudg, in all pointes doe.

I freelie fpeake; the caufe I fpeake foe free

Is, 'caufe atfirft, great Prince, you licenfd mee.

I haue accufd, but not excufd ;for Jiill

My fault's not leffondfor an others ill;

Therefore, my Prince, to this my pleadings tend,

You' I quitt my fault, and He my fault amend.

The Prince, well liftning to th' appeaching Oivle,

Turnes to the hawkes, on whom with wrathfull fcowl

Hefixt his eyes. Quoth he, fpeake, is it true,

My nobles, which this owle reports of you f

In guiltles b loud haue you embrud your hands f

T'is monftrous vilde! why, you'r* the propps of lanas,

The fteres-men to your Prince; by you hees lede ;

By whom but you fhould he be counfelled?

Your heades fhould conduifts be: cleare crijlallfprings,

From which fhould powre al wholfom virtuous things ;

From your brainesfountaines,fuch pur eftreamsfhouldflowe,

As by that moyfture things fhould flor if hing grow e.

Wherefore enaEl I lawes with your confentf I thinke, to punifh vice was our intent:

Will you that are parte-makers of the lawe, Be breakers ofitfirft? How then in awe Shall I my fubiefts haue? why, when they fe

You drownd in vice, they'le deeme the like of me. Difgracefullie then this they will report,

Howe

Araignement.

Howe their 's an extreame famin grown at court;

Of virtuous men, theresfuch a famin grown,

As fcarcelie one about the Court is knowne.

By you f hall I grow e to loathd infamie,

And iudgd the nurje offowle-fell tyranny ;

And therforc, nobles, yf you'r* free and cleare

From thefe dambd haynos crimes, makt now appeare.

Silence being made, the guiltie nobles, Seing themfelues to growe to dangrous trobles, Thus (defpratly] replies : oh King, quoth they, I hope vnto our murthers youl giue waie. Yfwe make fpoile, and other birds vndoe, We take thex' ample, fouraign Prince, from you. We nerejl Princes Imitate them ftill, We be the emblens of your good or III; Yf you flaie, we flaie ; yf you faue, we faue. All Kings about them manie fhadowes haue ; For this our fault we feeke not make excufe, Caufe from your f elf e f prang firjle this faults abufe; And therefore, King, yfyou'l haue fubiefts awe, You muft not onelie make, but keep your lawe.

This peremptorye aunfwere fo incenft His maiejlie, as tweene them wars comenft. But while as they were foe at Civill Jlrife, The Owle, that malefactour, faues hir life; She, being loofe, awaiefrom keeper Jcudds, Luf king from Jight all daie in thickejl woods;

But eu'ry night, about the outlaw e flies, Joying hir efcape; wo ho hofke cryes.

FINIS.

W. G.

V

PR 2279 G34S3 1897

Goddard, William

A satirycall dialogue

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UNIVERSITY OF TORONTO LIBRARY

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