Skip to main content

Full text of "Pioneer experiences, or, The gift of power received by faith [microform] : illustrated and confirmed by the testimony of eighty living ministers of various denominations"

See other formats



Cbc clnivcrsUv of Cbicaao 

^ v 







t (lift 0f ff Afeer E^efeb % jfaiib, 

r t : '.-!'' ^ 


'. 1 I i I - :" ' * J ": 

>. J | J ''.'I' ' ^ Vi' 'I..' = 

'BTTHB '"' r 



"^ O f 




OLD WOULD," &C., &C. 


" Ye are my ^fitnesses." 

"We speak that we do Unovv.'- 

"Wlioae faith follow." 




Entered according to Act of Congress in the year iS63, by 

W. C. PALMER, Jr., 
In the Clerk's offidfe of the District Court for the Southern District of New York 

Printers and Stereoty^ers, 43 Centre Street, New York. 



of euetiy name, who aije 

seeking to hnow if (pod has 

fulfilled the promise made to OUTJ 3f atheqa, 

that we being delivered out of 

. the hand of cu^ enemies, 

might ser^e him 

without feat[ 


all the days of ox{ life, 

tphese testimonies of Eighty Living Witnesses to 
the faithfulness of (pod, a^e affectionately inscribed by the 



what do you mean by PIONEEE EXPERIENCES ? 
says our friend, do you intend to give the experi- 
ence of such men as righteous Abel, Noah, Enoch, 
Abraham, and other old pioneers that served the 
God of heaven in the world's early history ? No I 

But let us tell you just what we do mean by the name 
that characterizes our work. It was neither of the antideluvi- 
ans, or of men living in the neighborhood of those days, to 
whose example Paul directed attention when he wrote, 
"WHOSE FAITH FOIXOW." It was of those, whom the Holy 
Ghost had appointed overseers of Chribt's flock, to whom the 
attention of the people were called, as an example in faith and 
practice. The day of which the prophet Joel" spake had come. 
The fulfillment of the promise made to our fathers had been 
made gloriously manifest in the experience of such men as 
Peter, John, James, Barnabas, Stephen, Paul, Timotheus, and 
a host of others, who had been placed over them, as leaders 
of various divisions of the sheep of our Lord's pasture. They 
were men of power, for the Holy Ghost had fallen upon them 
all, either at later, or earlier periods hi their Christian life. 
Paul, though born out of due tune, and not numbered with the 
one hundred and twenty, on whom the tongue of fire fell on 
the day of Pentecost, with other of his cotemporaries, now 
over the people, had alike proved through faith experiment- 
ally proved, that the promise of the Father had lost none of its 
freshness or power, and now he directs the people to the expe- 
rience of these pioneers in faith. 


Of course the things tliat were written aforetime, were, 
written for our instruction -in righteousness. Holy, heart expe- 
riences, and holy practices are necessarily associated, for out 
of the heart are the issues of life. Christian ministers, being 
openly set apart for a holy work, are expected to live mani- 
festly holy lives. But can one be holy hi all manner of con- 
versation, without holiness of heart? This is the " GIFT OE 
POWEB" that is to bring the world to Christ. Purity and 
power are identical. " Create in me a clean heart, O God, and 
renew a right spirit within me. * * * Then will I teach 
transgressors Thy ways ; and sinners shall be converted unto 

We live under the dispensation of the Spirit, the wondrous 
day of light and power of which the incarnate Deity spake, 
when in referring to his illustrious forerunner, said a greater 
prophet had not arisen, "Yet the least in the kingdom 6f 
heaven is greater than he!" Who will attempt to portray 
the momentous, solemn responsibilities of the ministry of the 
present day 1 And who shall lead forth the redeemed armies 
of the living God to conquests befitting the age, if we may not 
bring before them the testimony of men, who, from experi- 
mental realizations, can witness that the gift of power is still in 
the church, and that it is to be received by faith. Surely every 
Christian minister, irrespective of denomination, ought from 
this hour to be empowered to stand forth before the many 
powerless professors attendant on his ministry, proclaiming the 
attainment of the gift of power, as the privilege and duty of 
every believer. We say irrespective of denomination, because 
the time is past for the doctrine of Holiness to be characterized 
as the doctrine of a sect. It is the crowning doctrine of the 
crowning dispensation. It shines out with sunbeam brilliancy 
on every page of the New Testament Scriptures, as foreshad- 
owed hi the Old. And are not Christ's ministers, of every 
name, divinely called to stand out before their people, pro- 
claiming, "And we are His witnesses of these things, and so 
also is the Holy Ghost, whom God hath given to them that 
obey Him. " Surely ministers are called to the exercise of a 
pioneer faith, otherwise how can' their people "follow their 
faith," for "faith comcth by hearing." 


If I were required to plant my feet on a lofty eminence, the 
ascent to which seemed steep and rugged, I might, perhaps, 
with discouragement and perplexity, shrink away from meet- 
ing the requirement. But show me one who has once made 
the ascent, point to me the foot-marks where he firmly planted 
his feet in his upward flight, and I am more than satisfied. 
Courage and faith in a moment inspire my soul perplexities 
vanish. Buoyant with hope, I rapidly make the ascent, and 
inspiringly call to those still lingering at the base, "We are 
well able to go up," " This is the way, walk ye in it." 

Many are lingering at the foot of Zion's hill. Aye, multi- 
tudes are there, for 

" Wisdom shows a narrow path, 
With here and there a traveler.' ; 

Are you among those who are ascending, and are the marka 
by which you ascend, those which are clearly traced, hi the 
WOED OF GOD ? Then you can, with the holy heroism of 
David, exclaim, "He hath set my feet upon a rock, and estab- 
lished my goings. And he hath put a new song in my mouth, 
even praises to our God ; many shall see it and fear, and shall 
trust in the Lord." 

And now we need not tell you of the reasonableness ot 
being at much pains to show others who would ascend, the 
foot-marks by which you ascended. You see so many still fal- 
tering. Their feet have indeed been taken out of the horrible 
pit, and out of the miry clay ; but they are lingering on their 
way to Zion's Mount, ere they have scarcely begun to make the 
ascent. And your great Forerunner has caused the eyes of 
the multitude to be fixed on you, hi order that you may illus- 
trate the way by which you have experimentally tested the 
solidity of those foot-marks, by which you have thus fir 

You cannot illustrate Scriptural truth more instructively or 
more inspiringly than by your personal realizations. How 
often, or rather how continuously, did David and other Old 
Testament saints, and also Paul, and other New Testament 
saints, give force and illustration to their Scriptural teachings 
by reciting their own experiences. Again and again, both in 


the Old and New Testament, is it repeated, "Ye are my wit- 
nesses.^' "We speak that we do -know, and testify that we 
have seen." Other testimony than that given from personal 
knowledge, is not valid in civil jurisprudence. - And such testi- 
mony does our heavenly Lawgiver and Judge require of those 
whom he calls forth as witnesses before a gainsaying world. 

Of the propriety and importance of relating personal Chris- 
tian experience, we are aware that there exists a strong preju- 
dice in many, if not most of the Calvinistic denominations of 
the present day, yet there have been those among them, and 
those deservedly looked up to, that have given a most emphatic 
testimony to its importance and usefulness. , 

Matthew Henry, the Commentator says, "What God has 
wrought in our souls, as well as for them, we must declare to 
others. * * * God's people should communicate their 
experiences to teach others ; we should take all occasions to 
tell one another the great and kind things God hath done for 
us, especially our souls, the spiritual blessings; and these we 
should be most affected with ourselves, and with these we 
should endeavor to affect others." 

The Commentator, Dr. Scott, says: "Every servant of 
God is a witness for him ; and they all can give such an 
account of what he has wrought hi them, shown to them, and 
done for them, as to lead others to know, believe, and under- 
stand His power, truth and love ; and the help which He 
sends in answer to their prayers, enables them to testify that 
He never faileth those who trust in Him." 

And again he says, " I likewise learned the use of experi- 
ence in preaching, and was convinced that the readiest way to 
reach the hearts and consciences of others, was to speak from 
my own." 

Bishop Latimer, the martyr, said, hi speaking of Bilney 1 s 
experience, which had been so remarkably blessed to his con- 
version, "I learned more by this confession than by much 
reading, and in many years." 

We have no apology to make in bringing forward our 
" many witnesses," confirmatory of the faithfulness of God in 
fulfilling the oath which he sware to our father Abraham. 
And what is the oath by which He, whose name is FAITHFUI 


and TRUE, stands in the face of heaven and earth so solemnly 
pledged to His people ? "Would that we conld sound it out in 
tones louder than the thunders of Sinai, through all the ranks 
of Israel's hosts, this redeemed world oyer. How would it 
rouse the dormant energies of dying and dead churches all 
over Christendom, if all the watchmen in Zion would catch 
the sound, and reverherate it in the ears of their people. 

But we will trust that the voice of God, the Holy Ghost 
will be more potent than the thunders of Sinai. Listen ! O 
redeemed of the Lord. Zacharias was filled with the Holy 
Ghost, and spake, saying, "Blessed he the Lord God of Israel, 
for He hath visited and redeemed His people, and hath raised 
up an horn of salvation for us in the house of his servant 
David. As he spake by the mouth of his holy prophets, which 
have been since the world began : That we should be saved 
from our enemies, and from the hands of all that hate us ; to 
perform the mercy promised to our fathers, and to remember 
His holy covenant, the OATH that he sware to our father 


And now the question before the world is, Does God fulfill 
the oath that He sware to our fathers ? Is He true to His 
promise 2 It is a grievous fact, that some divines of marked 
prominence in the Christian world have dared to say, NO I 
Who has not met with many, even among the priests, 
whose lips should keep knowledge, and at whose mouth the 
people seek the law, as a messenger from the Lord of hosts, 
who so affirm ? Hundreds of ministers, even a* the present 
hour, are scattered over the Christian world, who, if the 
members of their flock should testify, that, from experience, they 
knew that God fulfilled the oath He sware to our fathers, and 
so saved from the hand of their enemies, that they were con- 
sciously enabled to " serve Him, without fear, in holiness and 
righteousness," would brand such as heretical, and their expe- 
rience on the subject, however Scripturally worded, as rank 
fanaticism. And all thia is done, unblushingly, in face of day, 
and in full view of the fact that Jesus says, *' Ye are my wit- 


nesses." Alas, for the poor bleeding cause of Christ a Chris* 
tianity sadly neutralized, and made of none effect through the 
traditions of men. How has the true and faithful witness been 
robbed of His glory, and the Church, which is His body, of the 
power which properly belongs to her, by being crucified be- 
tween two thieves. Of the world, at open enmity with God, 
we can lay claim to nothing better. A gospel, that but par- 
tially saves from the dominion of sin, is not a terror to evil- 
doers. But of Christian ministers, the grand ultimatum of 
whose work is to " present every man perfect in Christ Jesus,", 
it is not a tame error to rob Christ of His glory, by assuming 
that He is not able, and, in fact, does not so save His people 
from their sins, as to enable them " to serve Him, \\ ithout fear, 
in holiness and righteousness all the days of their life." 

"We met with a Doctor of Divinity, well known hi the reli- 
gious and literary world, and whose orthodoxy it would be 
unpopular to question, with whom we had a conversation in 
regard to the power of Christ to save His people from their 
sins. He expressed his distaste to the subject, said he could 
not believe the doctrine of being saved from all sin in the pres- 
ent life, iri view of all our natural and constitutional infirmities. 
He desired to know what we would do with the passage, 
"There is no man that liveth, and sinneth not." We sug- 
gested, in reply, that we understood it thus, "There is no man 
that liveth that does not need a Saviour every moment to save 
him, not only from sinning, but from its guilt and pollution." 
But grace is omnipotent, and it is said of our Emauuel, God 
with us, God in us, God for us, " His name shall be called 
JESUS, for He shall save His people from their sins, not in 
their sins, bu1/rom their sins. So that the humble, trusting, 
waiting soul may say, not only 

" Every moment, Lord, I need, 
The merit of thy death." 

But, by a momentary "looking to Jesus," in the language of 
appropriating faith, may exclaim, 

"Every moment., Lord, I Jiate 
The merit of Tliv death." 


u But," says the doctor, " what will you do with this pas- 
sage, ' If we say we have no sin we deceive ourselves, and the 
truth is not in us.'" 

Our answer was about thus, " We would take the passage, 
as a whole, precisely as it reads, ' If we confess our sins, 
(that is, acknowledge that we are sinners, and need a Saviour), 
He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us 
from all unrighteousness. 7 " Now, I would ask, What is the 
state of that soul who, having complied with the condition, that 
is, confessed his sin, and as an unquestionable result, proved the 
faithfulness and justice of God to forgive and cleanse ? Is he 
not from that moment empowered from on high to stand forth 
as a witness for Jesus of the infinite efficacy of His blood to 
cleanse from all unrighteousness ? And suppose that after 
being thsis cleansed through the blood of the Lamb, slain from 
the foundation of the world, he should, like as the nine, 
clear sed o their leprosy, be unwilling to glorify Christ openly. 
Whac base ingratitude towards the Divine Cleanser would this 
indicate ! And if asked, why not give to Jesus the glory due 
to His name, what should he say, but that my minister, in 
accordance with the views of the Church to which I belong, 
does not approve of the testimony. And thus our faithful 
Lord is robbed of the glory due to His name. This involves 
guilt, inasmuch as it is divinely enjoined, "Give unto God the 
glory due unto His name." 

Nothing can be more clearly demonstrated from the Scrip- 
tures o truth than that parity is power. It is the power for 
which the one hundred and twenty male and female disciples 
were commanded to tarry. It was on the eve of the day of 
Pentecost which was to usher in an era of power such as the 
world had never before witnessed. The newly risen Head of 
the Chuich, having performed His mission to earth, and being 
about to ascend to the Father, said, " Behold, I send upon you 
the promise of the Father ! But tarry ye until endued with 
power." Not regarding it as optional with themselves they 
tarried. What an endowment of power, when the cloven 
tongues of fire fell and sat upon each of them. It was then 
from constraining influences that they spake as the Spirit gave 
utterance. They did not testify of any thing they had dona 


for themselves, but of Christ. The result was that three thou. 
sand were convicted and converted in one day. But let ua 
imagine that after the promise of the Father bad thus been ful- 
filled, they had refused to testify to the faithfulness of God. 
How signal would have been the Divine displeasure ! The 
experiences of that day furnished a model for all future gene- 
rations of disciples. That many are receiving the gift of power 
at the present day, the following pages abundantly demon- 
strate. May thousands more believe through their testimony. 


IT has been announced that our volume would contain the Testimony of 
One Hundred Ministers. These were on hand, and it would have gratified ua 
beyond expression coiild we have brought them forward. Our only apology is 
WANT OF BOOM. We deemed it inexpedient to increase the price of our book 
by increasing its size beyond circumscribed limits, believing it to be the Divine 
order that it should be placed within reach of the multitude. This also must 
furnish our apology to several most excellent ministers whose experience will 
be found in this book, lor the liberty we have taken in abridging their arti- 
cles. We were constrained to do this with several most excellent and 
interesting experiences, which appear in the latter part of this volume, 
written at our own request, and which were sent in late. 

In preparing the material, we have been surprised and devoutly grateful 
that such an amount of valuable testimony, all bearing on special phases in 
the higher Christian life, should bo so diversified and marked for individual- 
ity. We are disposed to think that not one Christian reader, but will with 
ourselves be amazed, as he is introduced to one witness after another, and 
observes lines, distinctive as those marking the human face, identifying the 
personality of each as distinctive from the other giving an ever varying 
interest, devoid of sameness. To the Triune Deity be all the glory. 








" F. G. H1BBARD, D. D. " 34 



" LEWIS R. DUNN " 60 







" A. D. MERRILL 105 



j. H. MCCARTY I22 

G. HUGHES " 127 



; BENJAMIN SABIN.... " 142 

' J. BOYNTON " 145 












" B. S. SHARPE " 190 

" E. W. PIERCE . " 193. 



" R. V. LAWRENCE " -207 

" R. H. CRANE " 210 


" CYRUS BROOKS, D. D c - 217 


" JOHN H. STEWART " 232 

" J. R. DANIELS " 234 

" B. W. GORHAM " 240 

" L. M. EDMONDS " 248 

" DAVID NASH " ...251 

" J.W.HOOVER " ....'...... 256 

" P.C.BENNETT " 262 



" J. N. STOCKTON " 279 

" G. M. PIERCE " 285 

" JOHN M. PARKER " 291 

" A. M. STEELE " 293 

" C. O. COOK " 300 

" A. B. SMITH . 303 

" DAVID GAY " 306 

" R. W. HAWKINS " 309 

" DR. A. HILL " 313 

" R. N. SILSBEE " 317 

" J. MILLER " 321 

" F. S. MINTZER " 323 

" C. J. R1CHMAN " ,24 

" G. H. BLAKESLEE " 326 

" D. N. MULLER " 327 


" A. MILLIKEN " , 3 a 

" E. OWEN " 33! 

" W.G.BROWNING " 332 

" G. NEWTON " 334 

" B. G. PADDOCK 33g 

" C. B. FORD.... 337 

" J. N. SHORT " 33 3 

" H. NEFF 340 

" J.HUGHES " 34I 


" J. A. WOOD 346 

" M. P. GADDIS " 35I 






HE publishers of this book have furnished me 
the proof sheets, containing a portion of the 
ratives it records, and requested me to write & 
introduction. Having examined the sheets ? 
cheerfully comply with their request. 

It is not a denominational work. It does not profess to use 
the nomenclature, or employ the theological terms of any one 
branch of the Church exclusively. It is a free and frank con 
versation of ministers of various denominations, concerning 
their attainment and enjoyment of "Perfect Love." It is a 
book of personal experiences, having their harmonies morp 
perfectly, perhaps, in the hearts that share them, than hi tha 
words that utter them. 

It is not claimed that the experiences herein narrated arr 
new or novel. On the contrary, they profess to be illustrative 
and confirmatory of what predecessors in all ages of th? 
Church have enjoyed and declared. Jesus has always had 
ministers who have come to the people in " The fullness of th 
blessing of the Gospel of Christ." The Church has ever had 
members, who had been made " Meet to be partakers of the 
inheritance of the saints hi light." 

The Catholic Christian reader will be delighted to see how 
deeply experienced believers agree, in all that really pertaina 
to salvation, A.U these witnesses testify hi effect, that 
repenting of their sins, they were justified by faith in Christ ; 
that they lived in the enjoyment of this blessing for a longel 


or sliorter period ; that during thia time they found delight in the 
service and worship of God ; that possessing the spirit of adop- 
tion, they knew that they were, " Heirs of God and joint heirs 
with Jesus Christ;" that they often, " Rejoiced in hope of the 
glory of God ; " that subsequently to their having passed from 
death tinto life, and whilst retaining their gracious state, they 
were at times painfully conscious of the remains of the carnal 
mind within them. They often grieved that they did not love 
God with all the heart, and with all the soul, and with all the 
mind, and with all the strength, which is the first command- 
ment. At the same time they felt the utmost abhorrence of 
sin, and frequently unutterable yearning for purity. They 
" Hungered and thirsted after righteousness." The time came 
when under this strong, painful, but " sweet constraint," they 
determined, then, to seek a more satisfactory religious state. 
Enlightened by the word and Spirit of God, they perceived that 
" the Blood of Christ cleanseth from all sin." That it was the 
will of God they should be holy, because He is holy. ' ' Counting 
all things but loss for the excellency of the knowledge of Christ 
Jesus their Lord ; " " praying in the spirit," " Create in me a 
clean heart, O I God, and renew a right spirit within me." 
"The sactification of the spirit" was vouchsafed to them, and 
they were " filled with all the fullness of God." 

This I believe to be a just epitome of the experience 
described in these narratives. It will be useful to the reader 
to observe how these seekers of entire sanctification derived 
assistance from the promises of Holy Scripture. In most cases 
some particular promise was the basis of the faith which 
realized the blessing. I confess that when reading these 
experiences, I saw, as I had never before- seen, the import of 
this Scripture, "Whereby are given unto us exceeding great 
and precious promises, that by these ye might be partakers of 
the Divine nature, having escaped the corruption that is in 
the world through lust." Indeed, they are exceeding great and 
precious promises. The Giver, the glorious object for which 
they are given, and their adaptedness to that end, give them a 
value that finite mind cannot comprehend to all eternity. 

It will also be edifying to notice the distinct honor which 
many of the witnesses render to the Holy Ghost. No person 


can obtain entire sanctification without being conscious of his 
obligations to the Holy Ghost. I understand such persona 
when in describing their experience, they refer only to Christ, 
to speak of Hun as our " Great High Priest," by whose atone- 
ment and intercession we receive the Holy Spirit, who trans- 
forms us, "By the renewing of our minds, that we may prove 
what is that good and acceptable and perfect wiH of God." 
Still the usefulness of these testimonies will be greatly enhanced, 
by the distinctness with which they state the operations of the 
Holy Spirit in their sanctification. An Episcopalian, refering 
to the passage especially blessed to him, when seeking entire 
eanctification, says, " Through these words, familiar indeed, 
but never before so illumined by the Holy Spirit, a bright 
light entered my soul." Likewise a Presbyterian, " The words 
seemed to be at once revealed and applied by the blessed Spirit, 
as the full and fervent utterance of my own soul." Also a 
Butch Keformed witness, "O! how near was the Lord Jesus 
to my soul, cleansed by His precious blood and Spirit." A 
Baptist, after stating that the Holy Spirit came upon him "in 
mighty power," and describing His wonderful operations, says, 
"I could hardly bear to hear anything spoken, but the name 
or praise of the Third Person of the adorable Trinity." A 
Methodist uses the following language, "Entire sanctification 
now appears in my mind, a distinct work of the Holy Spirit." 
"The witness is as clear and far more powerful than was the 
witness of pardon or regeneration." Another Methodist says, 
"I was enabled soon to rejoice that the Holy Ghost was shed 
abroad in my heart, performing its great sanctifying work." 
A Congregationalist, Rev. Dr. Upham, expresses himself thus, 
**I do not consider consecration and sanctification the same 
thing. Consecration is the incipient, the pre-requisite act. It 
is the laying ourselves upon the altar ; but it is not until God 
has accepted the sacrifice, and wrought upon us by the con- 
suming and restoring work of the Holy Spirit, that we can be 
said to be sanctified. It is true the one may immediately and 
almost instantaneously follow the other ; and this will be the 
case when faith in God is perfect." Amen. Never did unin- 
spired man state the point more scripturally, or with more 
clearness and force. The title of the book also magnifies the 


office of the Holy Spirit, for wnat is the "gift of Power, but 
the gift of the Holy Ghost." 

We also ask the attention of the reader to the concurrence 
of the witnesses, that entire sanctification is "By faith,' 1 and 
to Wesley's sequence, -"If by faith, it may be now." 

The conjoint testimony of all these persons goes to establish 
these several facts in Christian experience : 1st. That conver- 
sion, by which term we mean justification, regeneration and 
adoption, is not only a change of our legal relation before the 
law of God, from one of condemnation to one of merciful 
acceptance, but also a radical and conscious change of our 
moral nature. 

2d. Not denying the possibility of entire sanctification at 
the time of conversion, (when justified and regenerated,) yet 
that certainly is not uniformly or ordinarily the case, because 
all these persons, while retaining the " Witness of the Spirit,' 1 
to their adoption, were painfully conscious of remaining evil in 
their hearts. Subjugated, but stirring and troublesome passion, 
tempers and desires, interrupting their peace and joy, and 
weakening their "might in the inner man," and hindering their 
love to God. 

3d. The possibility of our being sanctified wholly, soul, 
body and spirit, and preserved blameless unto the coming of 
our Lord Jesus Christ. Possible, because they knew them- 
selves thus sanctified by the " very God of Peace." The fact 
was demonstrated in their joyous experience. 

4th. Conceeding that this work may in some cases be a 
gradual one, yet they attest it may be an instantaneous one. 
The place, the circumstances, the moment of then: sanctifica- 
tion, are just as distinct in their knowledge and remembrance 
as any event in their past history, or any part of their past 

5tli. That being cleansed from all sin, and endued with 
power from on high, the greatest hindrances to progress in the 
divine life were removed. Then' aspirations after the knowl- 
edge of God, and greater resemblance to God, and closer 
intimacy with God, were wonderfully intensified. Much faster 
and more steadily could they now grow in grace, and in the 
knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ. 


6th. That this full salvation promoted their fruition of divine 
things. It imparted to them the peace of God, which passeth 
all understanding and joy in the Holy Ghost, unspeakable and 
full of glory. 

7th. The blessing greatly increased their spiritual power. 
The power to resist temptation, to trust in Christ, to love God, 
o pray, and for every good word and work. 

8th. That, though this grace greatly increased their stead- 
fastness in Christ, it did not render them impeccable. They 
were still probationers, and under the necessity of watching 
unto prayer. 

9th. That while entire sanctification makes us perfect 
Christians, it does not make us perfect men. Our bodies have 
been greatly impaired by the fall. We are encompassed with 
infirmities. Our knowledge is imperfect. Our judgment 
fallible. "We shall need the reconstruction of the resurrection 
to make us perfect men. But thank God His grace can make 
us perfect Christians here, and now. 

On all these points these witnesses testify, explicitly, posi- 
tively, and from personal knowledge. Certainly they are 
credible witnesses. They are all ministers in good standing in 
their respective Churches. Most of them are Christian pastors, 
honored and beloved by the congregations they serve. Some 
of them are official editors of. church papers, others are pro- 
fessors and presidents of literary institutions. They are not a 
company of enthusiasts, irresponsible and unworthy of cre- 
dence. No man will read the book, who, if he were a jurcr, 
would hesitate to act upon the testimony of any two of them, 
on any question upon which they claimed to have personal 
knowledge. How then can any one doubt this "Cloud of 

The readei of this book can form, from its "perusal, a good 
idea of what a Methodist Love Feast is. Indeed it would not 
be an unappropfiate title to call it, A Portable Love Feast. 

Praise God from whom all blessings flow, 
Praise Him all creatures here below, 
Praise Him above ye heavenly host, 
Praise Father, Son and Holy Ghost, 




Y early Christian experience had two prominent 
characteristics, a desire, inexpressibly strong, to 
be freed from all sin in every form, and to be 
entirely consecrated to the love and service of 
God, in all the powers and susceptibilities of my "being. 
Nor can any one conceive the gloom and horror that covered 
my mind, when older Christians assured me, and as I sup- 
posed with truth, that that was a state to which I should 
never, in this life, attain ; that my lusts would not be per- 
fectly subdued or subjected to the will of Christ, and that 
one of the brightest evidences of my conversion and growth 
in grace, was new discoveries of the deep and fixed corrup- 
tions of my heart corruptions from which I was never to 
be cleansed till death should deliver me from my bondage. 
Notwithstanding all the impediments thrown in the way cf 
my progress in holiness, I continued to press forward for a 
succession of years, till I could say, in the language of an- 
other, " I do know that I love holiness for holiness' sake." 
In this state, I commenced my studies as a student in 
college. Here I fell and fell, by not aiming singly at the 
"prize of the high calling," but at the prize of college 


honors. I subsequently entered a theological seminary, 
with the hope of there finding myself in such an atmos- 
phere, that my first love would be revived. In this expec- 
tation, I grieve to say, I was most sadly disappointed. I 
found the piety of my brethren apparently as low as my 
own. I hear say it with sorrow of heart, that my mind 
does not recur to a single individual connected with the 
" school of "the prophets," when I was there, Avho appeared 
to me to enjoy daily communion and peace with God. 

After completing my course under such circumstances, I 
entered the ministry, proud of my intellectual attainments, 
and armed, as I supposed, at every point, with the 
weapons of theological warfare, but with the soul of piety 
chilled and expiring within me. Blessed be God, the 
remembrance of what I had been, remained, and constantly 
aroused me to a consciousness of what I. was. I looked 
into myself, and over the church, and was shocked at 
what I felt and what I saw. Two facts in the aspect of 
the church and the ministry, struck my mind with gloomy 
interest. .Scarcely an individual, within the circle of my 
knowledge, seemed to know the gospel as a sanctifying or 
peace-giving gospel. In illustration of this remark, let me 
state a fact which I met with in the year 1831 or 1832. 
I then met a company of my ministerial brethren, who had 
come together from one of the most favored portions of 
the country. They sat down together, and gave to each 
other an undisguised disclosure of the state of their hearts, 
*rad they all, with one exception, and the experience of 
that individual I did not hear, acknowledged that they had 
not daily communion and peace with God. Over these 
facts they wept, but neither knew how to direct the others 
out of the thick and impenetrable gloom which covered 
them, and I was in the same ignorance as my brethren. 

I state these facts as a fair example of the state of the 
church, and of the ministry, as far as my observation has 


extended. When my mind became fully conscious of this 
fact, I was led to compare my own, and the experience of 
the church around me, with that of the Apostles and 
primitive Christians, and with the "path of the just," as 
described in the sacred Scriptures. I found the two in 
direct contrast with each other. Here the great inquiry 
arose in my mind, What is the grand secret of holy living f 
How shall I attain to that perpetual fullness and peace in 
Christ, which, for example, Paul enjoyed. Till this secret 
was fully disclosed to my mind, I felt that I was, and must 
be disqualified in one fundamental respect, to " feed the 
flock of God." While the gospel was not life and peace 
to me, how could I present it in such a manner that it 
would be life and peace to others. I must myself be led 
by the Great Shepherd, into the " green pastures and 
beside the still waters," before I could lead the flock of 
God into the same blissful regions. For years this one 
inquiry pressed upon my thoughts, and often, as I have 
looked over a company of inquiring shiners, have I said 
within myself, I would gladly take my place among those 
inquirers, if any individual would show me how to come 
into possession of the " riches of the glory of Christ's inher- 
itance in the saints." But clouds and darkness covered 
my mind in respect to this, the most momentous of all 

In this state of mind, I continued to press my inquiries 
with increasing interest upon this one subject, till the fall 
of 1836. At that time, during a series of religious meet- 
ings, a large number of the members of the church arose 
and informed us, that they were fully convinced that they 
had been deceived in respect to their character as 
Christians, and that they were now without hope, and 
appeared as inauirers, to know " what they should do to 
be saved." At the same time, the great mass of the 
remainder, disclosed to us the cheerless bondage in which 


they had long been groaning, and asked us if we 
could tell them how to obtain deliverance. I now fell 
myself, as one of the "leaders of the flock of God," pressed 
with the great inquiry above referred to, with greater 
interest than ever before. I set my heart by prayer and 
supplication to God, to find the light after which I had been 
so long seeking. 

In this state I visited one of my associates in the work, 
and disclosed to him the burden which had weighed down 
my mind for so many years. I asked him, if he could tell 
me the secret of the piety of Paul, and tell me the reason 
of the strange contrast between the Apostle's experienca 
and my own. In laboring for the salvation of men, I 
observed, that my feelings often remained unmoved and 
unaffected, while Paul was constantly "constrained" by the 
love of Christ. Our conversation then turned upon the 
passage, " The love of Christ constraineth us," &c. "While 
thus employed, my heart leaped up in ecstacy indescribable, 
with the exclamation, "I have found it." I have now, by 
the grace of God, discovered the secret after which I have 
been searching these many years. I understood the secret 
of the piety of Paul, and knew how to attain to that bliss- 
ful state myself. Paul's piety ah 1 arose from one cause 
exclusively, a sympathy with the heart of .Christ in his love 
for lost men. To attain to this state myself, I had only to 
acquaint myself with the love of Christ, and yield my 
whole being up to its sweet control. 

1. Christ had been but as one chapter in my system of 
theology, when He should have been the sun and centre 
of my system. 

2. When I thought of my guilt and need of justification, 
I had looked to Christ exclusively, as I ought to have done. 
For sanctification, on the other hand, to overcome the 
"world, the flesh, and the devil," I had depended mainly 
upon my own resolutions. Here was the grand mistake, 


and the source of all my bondage under sin. I ought to 
have looked to Christ for sanctification as much as for 
justification, and for the same reason. The great object 
of my being now was, to know Christ, and in knowing 
Hun, to be changed into his image. Here was the " victory 
which overcometh the world." Here was the " death of 
the body of sin." Here was " redemption from all iniquity," 
into the "glorious liberty of the children of God." At 
this time, the appropriate office of the Holy Spirit pre- 
sented itself to my mind with a distinctness and interest 
never understood nor felt before. To know Christ was the 
life of the soul. To " take of the things of Christ and 
show them unto us," to open our hearts to understand the 
Scriptures, to strengthen us with might in the inner ,man, 
that we might comprehend the "breadth and depth, and 
length and height, and know the love of Christ which 
passeth knowledge," and thus be " filled with all the full- 
ness of God," is the appropriate office of the Spirit. 
The highway of holiness was now rendered perfectly dis- 
tinct to my mind. The discovery of it was to my mind as 
"life from the dead." The disclosure of this path had the 
same effect xipon others, who had been, like myself, " weary, 
tost with tempest and not comforted." As my supreme 
attention was thus fixed upon Christ, as it became the great 
object of my being to know Him, and be transformed into 
His likeness, and as I was perpetually seeking that divine 
illumination by which I might apprehend Him, an era 
occurred in my experience, which I have no doubt will ever 
be one of the most memorable. In a moment of deep and 
solemn thought, the veil seemed to be lifted, and I had a 
vision of the infinite glory and love of Christ, as manifested 
in the mysteries of redemption. I wih 1 not attempt to 
describe the effect of that vision upon my mind. All that 
I would say is, that in view of it, my heart melted and 
flowed out like water. The heart of stone was taken 


away, and a heart of love and tenderness assumed its place. 
From that time I have desired to "know nothing but Jesus 
Christ and Him crucified." I have literally " esteemed al) 
things hut loss for the excellence of the knowledge of -Christ 
Jesus my Lord," and the knowledge of Christ has. been 
eternal life begun in my heart. 

Now when the Lord Jesus Christ was thus held up among 
us, by myself and others, a brother in the ministry arose in 
one of our meetings and remarked, that there was one 
question to which he desired a definite answer be given. 
It was this, "When we look to Christ for sanctification, 
what degree of sanctification may we expect from Him? 
May we look to Him to be sanctified wholly, or not 1 " I 
do not recollect that I was ever so shocked and confounded 
at any question before or since. I felt for the moment that 
the work of Christ among us would be. marred, and the 
mass of minds around us rush into Perfectionism. Still 
the question was before us ; and to it we were bound, as 
pupils of the Holy Spirit) to give a scriptural answer. "We 
did not attempt to give a definite answer to it at that time. 
With that question before us, we spent most of the whiter, 
in prayer and the study of the Bible. The great inquiry 
with us was, what degree of holiness may we. ourselves 
expect from Christ, when we exercise faith in Him ; and 
in what light shall we present Him to others, as a Saviour 
from sin ? We looked, for example, at such passages as this, 
passages of which the Bible is full, " And the very God of 
peace sanctify you wholly, and I pray God, your whole 
spirit, and soul and body be preserved blameless unto the 
coming of our Lord Jesus Christ. Faithful is he that 
calleth you, who also will do it." We looked at such pas- 
sages, I say, and asked ourselves this question, Suppose an 
honest inquirer after holiness asks, what is here promised to 
the believer ? May I expect, in view of this prayer and prom- 
ise, that God will sanctify me wholly, and preserve me in 


that state, till the coming of otir Lord Jesus Christ *? 
What answer shall we give him ? Shall we tell him that 
merely partial and not perfect holiness is here promised, 
and that the former and not the latter he is here author- 
ized to expect? After looking prayerfully at the testimony 
of Scripture in respect to the provisions and promises of 
divine grace, we were constrained to admit, that but one 
answer to the above question could be given from the 
Bible ; aud the greatest wonder with me is, that I have 
been so long a " master in Israel, and have never before 
known these things." Since that time we have never 
ceased to proclaim the redemption of Christ as a full 
redemption. Nor do we expect to cease proclaiming it as 
a full and finished redemption, till Christ shall call us 
home. For myself, I am willing to proclaim it to the 
world, that I now look to the very God of peace to sanc- 
tify me wholly, and preserve my Avhole spirit, and soul 
and body, blameless xmto the coming of our Lord Jesus 
Christ. I put up this prayer with the expectation that the 
very things prayed for will be granted. Reader, is that 
confidence misplaced? In expecting that blessing, am I 
leaning upon a broken reed, or upon the broad promise of 

There is one circumstance connected with my recent 
experience, to which I desire to turn the attention of the 
reader. And that is this ; that I have forever given up 
all idea of resisting temptation, subduing any lust, appetite 
or propensity, or of acceptably performing any service for 
Christ, by the mere force of my own resolutions. If my 
propensities, which lead to sin, are crucified, I know that 
it must be done by an indwelling Christ. If I overcome 
the world, this is to be the victory, " even our faith." If 
the great enemy is to be overcome, it is to be done "by the 
blood of the Lamb." 

Believing, as I now do, that the Lord Jesus Christ has 


provided special grace for the entire sanctification of every 
individual, for the subjection of all his propensities, for a 
perfect victory over eveiy temptation and incentive to sin, 
and for rendering us, in every sphere and condition in Hie, 
all that -He requires us to be ; the first inquiry with me is, 
In what particular respect do I need the grace of Christ I 
What is there, for example, in my temper that needs cor- 
rection 1 "Wherein am I in bondage to appetite, or to any 
of my propensities "? What are the particular responsibil- 
ities, temptations, &c., incident to each particular sphere 
and condition in life in which the providence of God has 
called me to act ? What is the temper that I ought, then, 
to manifest, so that I may every where, and under all cir- 
cumstances, reflect the image of Christ? 

Thus having discovered my special necessity, in any one 
of the particulars above referred to, my next object is, to 
take some promise applicable to the particular exigency 
before me, and to go directly to Christ for the supply of 
that particular necessity. By having the eye of faith per- 
petually fixed upon Christ in this manner, by always looking 
to Him for special grace in every special exigency, yes, for 
"grace to help in every time of need," how easy it is to 
realize in our blessed experience the truth of all the 
" exceeding great and precious promises " of divine grace. 
How easy it is to have the peace of God, which passeth all 
understanding, "keep our hearts and minds through Christ 
Jesus." "Our peace is then as a river, and our right- 
eousness as the waves of the sea." The mind seems to be 
borne upward and onward, as upon an ocean of light, peace 
and blessedness, which knows no bounds. 

" glorious change ! tis all of grace 

By bleeding love bestowed 
On outcasts of our fallen race, 

To bring them home to God 
Infinite grace to vileness given, 
The sons of earth made lieirs of heaven." 


And now, reader, " my heart's desire and prayer to 
God" for you, is, that you may know this full redemp- 
tion. If you will cease from all efforts of your own, and 
bring your sins, and sorrows, and cares, and propensities 
which lead into sin, to Christ, and cast them all upon Him, 
if with implicit faith, you will hang your whole being upon 
Him, and make it the great object of life to know Him ; 
for the purpose of receiving and reflecting his image, you 
will find that all the " exceeding great and precious prom- 
ises " of his word, are, in your own blissful experience, a 
living reality. The water that Christ shall give you, 
" shall be in you a well of water springing up into ever 
lasting life." You shall have a perpetual and 'joyful 
victory over the " world, the flesh, and the devil." Every 
where, and under all circumstances, your peace in Christ 
shall be as a "river, and your righteousness as the waves 
of the sea." " 0, taste and see that the Lord is good." 
" There is no want to them that fear Him." And, reader, 
when your cup is once filled with the love of Christ, you 
will then say with truth, " The hah has not been told me." 
" Eye hath not seen, nor ear heard, nor have entered into 
the heart of man, the things which God hath prepared for 
them that love Him." 



record the goodness of God in leading me into 
the enjoyment of a full salvation, I must first 
narrate the manner in which, by the Divine 
hand, I was led out of the Egypt of sin and un- 
belief, from the galling service of a slavish fear ; then how 
by the same hand, I was led into that state beautifully 
symbolized by the land "flowing with milk and honey," 
into the Canaan of "perfect love." Being the son, the 
grandson, and the great-grandson of a Methodist, I en- 
joyed all the advantages of early religious instruction of 
pious example of good books combined with the most 
powerful influence of religious association. And in youth, 


When a lad, in a crowded parlor at my grandfather's, 
in Ireland, the Eev. Mr. Olives stood behind a chair and 
preached Jesus. I sat on that chair during the sermon, 
and felt that my heart was then made new. For months 
my heart was full of peace and joy, and love, and praise. 
1 loved prayer and praise more than my play, or my din- 
ner, but I did not fully understand it, I made no profession 
of it, and after a time, a change of country, companionship 

KEY. W. H. POOLE. 21 

and circumstances, drew me away from the spiritual to the 


For nine or ten years I met regularly in class-meeting 
and love-feast, and I used to enjoy it. It was a pleasure 
and a profit to me ; but all that time I never witnessed for 
Christ. " With my mouth " I did not make confession, as 
was my duty. I tried to overcome my timidity, but could 
not. I suffered much from my backwardness in this duty ; 
my silence caused me sad loss. I had many a long and 
terrible struggle, and I suffered many a crushing defeat, 
until at length I gave up the conflict, gave place to the 
enemy, quenched the spirit, and sat in silence and in tears. 
The Rev. "Wm. Willoughby once in class-meeting lifted me 
on my feet, as if in love, he would compel me to victory, 
but my lips were sealed. If I could have done as Moses, 
Miriam & Co. did, when the Lord opened up a patlway 
for them through the sea, and they sang their experience, I 
would have "triumphed gloriously," but I could not hold 
up the banner for Jesus, every attempt only proved my 
inability, and failing, I became discouraged, and lost my 


Gales of heavenly love brought new life and power to 
our church and congregation, and scores of my acquaint- 
ances gave evidence of a change of heart. Members of 
our family, too, were made to rejoice in God their Saviour, 
and witnessed a good confession, but during that season of 
refreshing, I lost my tenderness of heart my comfort in 
the ordinances my communion with God my delight in 
His Word my love for religious conversation my taste 
for good books my anxiety to ,please God at all times. 
Indeed I lost all but the form of religion ; I became a won- 
der to many, and to myself also. I wandered in thought 
and feeling. I attended the means, and tried to trust in 


the midst of overwhelming doubt. I was in the wilderness 
of Zin, i. c. coldness, that district lies between Egypt and 
Canaan. There are many existing (it is not living) in that 
region ; many die there of whom it might be said they died 
of coldness of heart. 


I might have gone up at once and possessed the goodly 
land ; but I was too timid, too faint-hearted, those Anakims, 
the word means men of long necks, how they discouraged 
Israel. Were those sons of Anak types of those persons, a 
large class or tribe in some communities, who claim the 
right of stretching their necks to watch for the errors and 
failings of young converts? The fear of man proved a 
great snare to me. Such persons greatly hinder and retard 
the pilgrim on his way to Eshcol and Zion. 

My parents, friends and pastors were not forgetful of 
me, they followed me in their sympathies and prayers back 
to Pi-hahiroth, the spring of liberty, or the mouth of deliv- 
erance, and farther, even into bondage, and in answer to 
prayer, God saw fit to speak to me more directly, more 
personally, and more powerfully than before. He did 

this in A DKEAM. 

Dreams, no doubt, are often produced by physical 
causes, and are, in general, not worth a place in the mem- 
ory where they have failed to make an impression. Yet 
God does, sometimes, as in the days of old, speak in 
dreams. It is unpopular now to speak of impressions re- 
ceived through this channel. I know it, dear reader, but 
the popular rule is not always the way of duty, thanks be 
to God, through Jesus Christ our Lord, that I am not now 
afraid cf the sons of Anak, and for the honor of God I can 
say, " this shall be written for generations to come. 


I saw that life and time were past the judgment day 

REV. W. H. POOLS. 23 

at hand I heard the trump of God I saw the response 
of earth as the dust stirred and heaved with life as the 
trumpet-sound pierced the dull, cold ear of nature, and 
echoed through all the cemeteries, vaults, catacombs and 
caverns of mountain and of deep. The angels removed 
the mountains and the water-courses, and prepared room 
for the human race. Each person seemed alone, though 
in the mighty throng. Each individualized, each conscious 
of his state. I saw the great white throne coming down 
in mid-heaven, and resting as it were on a bow or arch 
that spanned the horizon. That arch seemed to be formed 
of clouds that became more dense and dark as they receded 
from the gi-and stairway of light that connected earfch and 
sky. I sa,w the Saviour, Jesus, as judge, seated on the 
throne, and before .him on the right were books of immense 
proportions, in which appeared names and deeds. 

Open to every eye was a hall, or gallery of judgment, 
through which every one must pass on his way to his re- 
ward. On the right, and above, this hall or gallery was 
connected with the celestial home or heavenly country, 
while on the left and beneath it was connected with dark- 
ness and woe. On the right and above were angels of 
light to welcome the good and the pure to their home on 
high. The floor of this hall seemed to be constructed of 
bars and lines and spaces, as the scale in music, those of 
pure motive and holy life went over those spaces with a 
buoyant step and a bounding heart, as if gravitation had 
lost its power over them ; while the disobedient and unholy 
disappeared quickly in the darkness below. Sin seemed to 
be the great force that drew them downward, the more sin 
the sooner they disappeared, and with greater velocity. As 
on the other hand, the more holiness, the more immediate 
and the more rapid their flight upward. The white robed 
ones were all singing, and as the redeemed ones joined them 
they too commenced to sing. 


As I stood petrified by fear, I saw many whom 1 had 
known in life, who, when measured by human standards, 
were pronounced wanting, to whom the Judge gave a look 
of approbation that filled them with light and glory, and 
made them almost transparent, so that heaven and earth 
witnessed their joy. I saw members of the church, and 
church officers, and ministers of the gospel, whom human 
standards would pronounce all right, but who in the hour 
of judgment stood condemned and disappeared in darkness, 
some were out of sight at once, and others passed on and 
were almost over and disappeared in a moment. Oh, the 
anguish of mind the bitter regrets for broken vows and 
neglected duties, such views of God's love and goodness, 
of the exceeding sinfulness of sin, such longing for holiness. 

When my name was called by an angel that seemed 
to have charge of the records of eternity, obedience 
was not voluntary, as in life. My will seemed to have 
no part in influencing my action, my going seemed not 
to be of myself, an unseen power controlled all, and 
compelled compliance. In the presence of the throne and 
of the Judge, the most timid would not be afraid of the 
whole human family. It is utterly impossible to describe 
my feelings as I ascended the stairs of light, and oh how 
strange that I should be the only one who dared to speak 
to the Judge, or utter a word, but I did speak. His look 
of love prompted me to speak, and inspired me with confi- 
dence. He seemed to say, speak on, and I exclaimed, " O, 
dear Saviour, don't send me over, I am not prepared." And 
0, boundless love, infinite, immeasurable love. He permitted 
me to return and prepare, and go and persuade others to 
prepare for judgment. I awoke, but I have not forgotten 
my dream. My appeal was spoken in accents so loud as 
to disturb my parents who came to my room. For days 
and nights my sleep departed from me, and when anxiety 
and grief had wearied my body and mind, and I slept 

REV. W. S. POOLE. 25 

a^ain, my dream came back upon my spirit with all the 
definiteness and distinctness of reality. There was a 
grandeur and a majesty about every point in it, that I can 
never describe. For some weeks I could think of nothing 
else; my strength failed ; "1 was sick certain days." My 
cup was filled with the "waters of Marah," they were 
indeed very bitter. When wearied walking my room, j 
often wet "my pillow with my tears." 

For three months I sought the Lord constantly. I 
think I understand the meaning of the "unleavened bread 
and the bitter herbs." I gave up business and devoted my 
time exclusively to reading and prayer, hoping that God 
would come to my rescue. Thank God, He did come, but 
first he came to me in a dream. 


I saw myself in a vast desert, without a drop of water, 
or compass, or guide, parched with scorching winds and 
burning sands, my only companion was despair. Unable 
to stand from weakness and fatigue, I sat down, feeling 
that death itself would be welcome. At length I looked 
up, and saw, far, far away, where sand and sky seemed to 
meet, a beautiful mansion, or city of mansions. In the 
sky above were the words: "Boom for all," and "Jesus 
bids you come." I felt my heart grow lighter, and my 
limbs grew stronger, and I made my way to it. There was 
only one entrance ; between the outer gate and that en- 
trance there were fountains of water, and fruits, and flow- 
ers, in all forms of loveliness ; but, to my astonishment, as I 
approached the gateway (for there was no gate, it was 
open night and day), I saw thousands of hideous serpents, 
with eyes of fire, and teeth and tongue of poison. I paused 
a moment, and looking in, I saw Jesus standing at the door 
with hands outstretched, and that same look of love and 
compassion I saw before, when he sat on the throne, and 


he repeated Matt. xi. 28 and 29, " Come unto me all ye 
that labor ;" and I walked on and over the serpents un- 
hurt, and threw myself' at His feet, full of peace and joy. 
I awoke and was much cheered, and slept and dreamed 
the same again, I arose, a long while before day, and spent 
the day alone with God, in meditation and prayer, and 
twenty-two hours after my dream, or at 2 o'clock A. 31,, in 
my father's stable, after spending the night in prayer, I saw 
a star which led me in thought to the star of Bethlehem. I 
knelt once more in prayer and said, " Father, bless me for 
JESUS' sake," and in a moment my long dark night was 
turned into more than noon-day brightness. " My chains 
fell off, my heart was free," all doubt was gone, and I 
made the air ring with hallelujahs to Jesus. I had good 
reason for praising God, and I did praise him. I awoke my 
dear father and mother, and they too praised God in my 
belutlf. I, who had trusted so much to my own righteous- 
ness, now trusted solely in the righteousness of Christ. ' I, 
who had been silent in class for nearly ten years, now 
found a tongue. I, who was so timid that I could not 
speak one word for Jesus, now began to tell to thousands 
what the Lord had done for me. O, if once I drank the 
bitter waters of Marah, I now drank from the smitten 
rock on the highlands of Rephidim. If I once was afraid 
of the long-necked Anakim, I now went right up into their 
camp, shouting victory through the blood of the Lamb. 
If I once sat me down on arid sands to die of thirst, I now 
enjoyed the famous twelve wells of water and the seventy 
palm trees cooling shade. If once I had to eat bitter 
herbs, believe me, my dear reader, I have been feasting on 
the real manna since the morning of July the 8th, 1838. 


Whatever I pass through, I can never doubt my expe- 
rience of the grace of God, that happy, happy hour. But 

REV. W. S. POOLE. 27 

leaving Egypt is not entering into Canaan feasting on 
manna and drinking from the new made fountain is very 
pleasant, but it is not crossing over Jordan, and stormuy 
Jericho. Enjoying the cooling shade of the palm is no 
conquering the land and exterminating the enemies of God 
and the country. "Up, sanctify yourselves." A great 
many left Egypt that never entered Canaan. The first 
step from Egypt is one towards Canaan, and every suc- 
ceeding step, forward, is so much gained. So the work 
of holiness commences, when the first ray of light moves 
you to repentance, and every successive ray of light that 
leads you on to justification, adoption, and regeneration, is 
so much more gained in the work of holiness, and is pre- 
paratory to it. But there will come a time in your expe- 
rience, if you go forward, when you will as clearly and as 
fully know that you have entered Canaan, as that you 
have left Egypt ; or, to "be more definite, the evidence of 
our sanctification may be as clear and as convincing as 
the evidence of our justification. If God grants an abiding 
testimony when he changes our relationship and removes 
the guilt of sin, giving us pardon, will he not, through the 
same spirit, give us a satisfactory and an abiding assurance 
when he changes our nature, and imparts the divine na- 
ture, cleansing us from the pollutions of sin, and renewing 
us after the image of God. 

I had a clear and satisfactory evidence of my forgive 
ness, and could pay and feel, that " Being justified by faith 
I had peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ." A 
peace that passeth all understanding. At the same time, 
I felt a conviction of the necessity of a more complete con- 
secration to God ; that in order to my own happiness and 
usefulness, I must have the victory over Self, the World, 
and Satan ; that I must have my nature purified ; that 
having the righteousness of Christ imputed to me, it musl 
also be imparted to me, and be implanted in me. 


In order to obtain that holiness I no tv longed for, it 
seemed to me that the first step for me was to be fully 
convinced, beyond a doubt, that upon the Divine testimony 
such a blessing was attainable. 1 read Fletcher and Wes- 


ley and others on the subject, but iirst I must satisfy my- 
self of " the law and the testimony " on the subject. I 
collected and arranged all the passages in the Old and New 
Testaments. I did this with great care, examining every 
term used, and each passage separately; my notes taken at 
the time are now before me. A brief reference to them 
may help some inquiring one : 1. Scripture commands, 
"Be perfect," "Thou shalt love." 2. Promises, "I will 
sprinkle clean water," "I will cleanse," "Blessed are the 
pure." 3. Prophecies, "And an highway," "There shall 
be upon the bells of the horses," "Holiness to the Lord," 
i. e., "the commerce, the recreations, and the pleasurable 
of life shall all be holy, "And every pot in Jerusalem and 
Judah," "All the eating and drinking shall be done to his 
honor and glory." 4. Precedents, "Let us, therefore, as 
many as be perfect," " Herein is our love." 5. Scripture 
invitations, "Come now and let us reason," "Sins scarlet." 
6. Exhortations, "Wash you, make you clean," "Let pa 
tience have her perfect," "That we being delivered out of 
the hands of our enemies might serve him without fear in 
holiness and righteousness all the days of our lives." 7. 
Prayers, " Create in me a clean," " Sanctify them through 
thy truth," "May the very God of peace sanctify you," 
" Preserved blameless." 8. Declarations of enforcing the 
doctrine "If I wash thee not," "Without holiness no 
man shall see thee," "If we confess our sins," "There is no 
fear in love, but perfect love," " May be filled with all the 
fullness of God," "To him that loved us, and washed us." 
There are scores of such passages spoken by God to 
me, to thee, dear reader. They show what He requires of 
us, and these requirements harmonized with the teachings 

REV. W. H. POOLS. ' 29 

of the Holy Spirit to my mind and heart, and with the felt 
want of my nature, these truths provided so fully, and 
offered so freely, that, for which my new relationship leads 
me so eagerly to pant, that I felt my longing soul to be 
all on fire, to be dissolved in love. 


God, through Jesus Christ, had done a great work for 
me. I now felt that the work of sanctification was a work 
in which the whole Trinity were engaged. The Father, 
through the Son, by the Holy Spirit, "working in me to 
will and to do of his good pleasure." The following pas- 
sages were applied to my mind with great power : 

1. It is the work of the Father, "Now the God of 
peace that brought again from the dead our Lord Jesus 
Christ, through the blood of the everlasting covenant, make 
you perfect in every good work to do his will." 

2. It is the work of the Son, " Who gave himself for 
us, that he might redeem us from all iniquity, and purify 
unto himself a peculiar people." " He loved the church 
and gave himself for it, that he might sanctify and cleanse 
it with the washing of water by the Word, that he might 
present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot or 
wrinkle, or any such thing, but that it should be holy and 
without blemish." 

3. It is the work of the Holy Ghost, " through sancti- 
fication of the Spirit by the washing of regeneration and 
renewing of the Holy Ghost." 

The conviction that it was my privilege to be sanctified 
body, soul, and spirit, came in like a flood of light upon 
my soul ; a knowledge that it was the will of God, even 
my sanctification, laid me under such a weight of responsi- 
bility, that I saw as never before, that my privilege was 
the measure of my responsibility. Pie had given me light- 
er knowledge of my sinfulness, that light produced convic- 


tion, and contrition, and repentance, and turning to Mm 
wiih ray whole heart, trustingly, I was accepted through 
Christ. He took me into His family, and now He was will- 
ing to make me holy ; to cleanse me from all sin, to im- 
part His own nature ; to stamp upon my being His own 
moral image ; to give me spiritual conformity to His image 
and likeness ; to clothe me with courtly apparel, with the 
costume of saints ; to bestow upon me royal immunities 
and privileges ; to admit me to the royal banqueting house, 
to the family table ; to give me a meetness and a title to 
the royal presence ; to secure me constant access there ; 
to afford me parental instruction in the school-room of 
Christ ; to make me wise unto salvation, and honor me 
with the most illustrious titles, as "son," "heir," "joint- 
heir," etc. ; to secure me a royal guard for my protection, 
and a throne, and a crown, and a kingdom where there 
are pleasures for evermore. Was I willing ? Not only 
willing, but intensely desirous to be thus transformed by 
the renewing of my mind. My whole nature drawn out, 
and up, and on to Him. ' It was not the anxiety I had 
when I sought for pardon, there was not here any sense or 
feeling of condemnation. By no means. I had a great 
peace, and I praised God night and day. Then, I was 
moved with fear, now my promptings were love ; then, I 
had a sense of displeasure, now, the smile of approval ; 
then, I came tremblingly, as a stranger, now, with confi- 
dence as a child ; I was then afraid He would employ me, 
now, T was glad to think he would give me something to 
do, and I promised that I would do all that He commanded 
me, trusting Him for strength. 


In this state of mind, earnestly looking for the work of 
holiness to be wrought in me, " my heart and my flesh 
crying out for the living God," the spirit of the Lord 

REV. W. H. POOLE. ; 31 

impressed my mind with the thought, that sanctifi cation 
was. not only the work of God in man, but that it was 
mans work too. And now for days, all those texts point- 
ing out our duty in this work, came to my mind. Holi- 
ness is a duty assigned as well as a privilege afforded, " Be 
ye holy," is a command, " Ee thou perfect ;" there is a per- 
son addressed there, and a duty assigned to that person. 
"Make yourselves a new heart," and a "new spirit." "We 
are called to " cleanse ourselves from all filthiness of the 
flesh and of the spirit, perfecting holiness in the fear of the 
Lord." "Wash you, make you clean." " That ye put off the 
old man, and be renewed in the spirit of your mind, and 
that ye put on the new man, which after God is created 
in righteousness and true holiness." " Sanctify yourselves.'' 
"Work out your own salvation." " Give all diligence." I 
saw from these and other passages of the Word, that the 
whole responsibility came back on me again." Have I 
done my part ? Have I complied with His conditions ? 
Have I given myself fully to Him 1 The work of sacrifice, 
of self-denial, of complete surrender, of entire consecra- 
tion, of yielding up all confidence in working, was fully 
before my mind. Aaron and his sons were sanctified 
when they were " set apart," devoted, or consecrated to 
the priesthood. ""The Sabbath clay was sanctified when it 
was set apart for God. The furniture of the tabernacle 
was made holy, or sanctified, when separated to holy pur- 
poses or surrendered to God's service. The vessels of the 
temple became holy, were made such, when set apart to 
temple service. The lamb became the Lord's, in the sense 
of a sacrifice, not when it was caught, or confined in a 
place of safety, but when it was boxmd to the altar of 
God ; then and not till then did it become holy. 

I could not believe that I was accepted of Him, while 
I was in doubt as to the completeness and sincerity of my 
act of consecration. I must first make the surrender on 


my part, and bind myself in solemn covenant to Him, be 
fore I could trust Him for acceptance, and for the bestow- 
ment of that blessing I desired. The self-examinations, 
heart-searchings, and reasonings of my mind just here, 
lasted for some time. I saw that to pray sincerely and in 
faith, that God would cleanse and renew, I must be con- 
scious that the vessel I wanted him to purify and fill was 
not to be used in the secular and the worldly. It must 
be dedicated to His honor and His glory. This question 
spread out before me in all its proportions, as a life ques- 
tion, as connected, indeed, with eternal life. A complete, 
entire, unreserved, unconditional devotement of self to 
God is necessaiy before the exercise of that faith that 
purifies. The " old man " must be crucified, nailed upon 
the cross, and put to death, before the " new man " will 
come in, and wash, and cleanse, and refit, and refurnish, 
and ornament the temple of the heart with all the lovely 
virtues and graces of the Holy Spirit. It is painful to 
fasten the old nature on the rugged wood. It requires a 
very firm resolution. Human nature cries out for sympa- 
thy, and sometimes resolution fails, and the work of nail- 
ing him up is not half done. Often we take him down and 
administer cordials and revive his dying energies, and 
Satan and the carnal heart triumphs, then we gather up 
our resolution, and muster courage for another conflict, 
and succeed with the " old man " as before. There must 
be an unwavering determination to please God, such an 
invincible purpose as will lead us to nail the old man on 
the cross, and go and nail him more firmly if need be. 
The question often came to my mind, can I crucify self 
and all that pertains to the carnal mind ? Can I bear the 
reproach, for it is sure to come, that such a sacrifice will 
bring upon me ? Can I witness for Christ and his power 
to save from all sin ? I am sorry to say that at first my 
courage failed me, and I shrank from the duty, but the 

EEV. W. JT. POOLE. 33 

Lord helped me, and I came from the closet saying, " I 
can do all things through Christ who strengtheneth me." 
I had there on my knees counted the cost. I reviewed the 
whole question in all its forms, with aE its conditions and 
consequences, and I said, "O, God, my heart is filled," I 
am thine. With some emotion and trembling of heart, 1 
took my pen and wrote, 

" Lord, in the strength of grace, with a glad heart and free, 
Myself, my residue of days, I consecrate to thee." 

I am thine, thine for ever, fully, freely, for ever thine, 
through Jesus Christ my Lord, Amen. While recording 
the words of this covenant or consecration, my head and 
ruind acted out its full import. I gave myself, I trusted, 
and I shouted his praise from a full and a pure heart. 
The double cure was effected, the water and the blood 
applied, and I, even I, was made whole. I have no lan- 
guage to express my feelings of gratitude. I think I had 
an experience of what Bunyan meant by the Slough of 
Despond. I know I was wounded by the bowmen of the 
enemy, and often discouraged by the lions in the way ; but 
now, I triumphed so in Beulah, my sun went not down, 
the songs of Zion. ever cheered me, the perfume from the 
garden delighted my spiritual senses, " it was heaven be- 
low." I had gone up into Canaan, and my inheritance 
was the valley of Sharon, and the mountains of Carmel 
and Tabor. I then began to grow in grace, to understand 
in some humble way the glorious privilege of living by 
faith upon the promise of God. There is a luxury divine 
in trusting Jesus. Oh, what a melting of heart what a 
subduing of the will what an emptying of self, and what a 
communication of the divine fullness. It was love filling and 
flooding my whole heart, refining my nature, and giving me 
complete victory over self, sin and Satan, "Thanks be to God, 
who giveth us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ" 



WICE within now nearly forty years of my 
Cliristian life have I been brought, through infi- 
nite mercy, to the experience and evidence of 
perfect love. The ancient command may not 
be inappropriate to me : " Thou shalt remember all the way 
which the Lord thy God led thee those forty years in the 
wilderness, to humble thee, 'and to prove thee, to know 
what was in thy heart, whether thou wouldest keep His 
commandments or no." (Deut. viii. 2). But I can speak 
only of a few points. 


A definite, deep, and abiding conviction of the neces- 
sity of this work preceded my seeking it. The circum- 
stance that awakened this conviction, accompanied as it 
was with an awful apprehension of losing my hold on 
God, and at last losing my soul also without it, was 
the timidity and dread I felt in doing all my duty. The 
duties which I felt I could not perform were, 1. A regular 
habit of confessing Christ in social meetings; 2. Vocal 
prayer in social meetings ; 3. Family prayer in my father's 
family in his absence. Hitherto mv mother had kept up 

REV. F. G. HIBBARD, D. D. 35 


this duty, in my father's absence. I felt I ought to perform 
it. I was a convert of five months' old. My secret duties 
were regular ;" class and church attendance irreprovable ; 
my life religious, and my conscience tender. But I had 
strength only occasionally to speak for Jesus .a few words 
in a social meeting, and thought I absolutely could not pray 
vocally in the hearing of any person. No one will ever 
suffer more than I did for two months, till I was driven to 
the brink of despair. I was young, and untaught in these 
ways ; yet the Spirit told me that nothing but a complete 
surrender of my all, to be governed wholly and without 
reserve by the will of God, at all times, on all occasions, 
in all places and conditions, would ever meet the wants of 
my. soul. I had made many promises ; greatly increased 
my faithfulness in all duties, except those public ones, in 
hopes to grow into spiritual strength sufficient to lift these 
crosses also ; had promised the Lord, if he would give me 
. the blessing I sought, so as to assure me that I had strength 
adequate, I would then go forward in duty ; had set apart 
weeks of .prayer, fasting, watching, and special labor, for 
the longed-for grace. But all availed not; my heart 
seemed more barren, dark and distant from God than ever ; 
and I grew thoroughly alarmed at what I justly considered 
my wretched and perilous state. The thoughts of my 
social religious duties haunted me like spectres of Sheol. I 
saw our older brethren pray and speak in social meetings 
without any embarrassment, as though they enjoyed it ; and 
I deemed them the happiest and most honored of men. I 
thought perhaps, by the time I \vas as old as they, I should 
. be able to do the same. 


My distress of mind so increased, though I was leading 
a life of daily prayer and self-denial, and special pleading 
for holiness, that I felt at length the controversy must be 


decided. I dropped my work one day, went alone to one 
of my places of prayer in the barn, and fell before God 
with something of the shuddering as though I was going 
to be immolated as a sacrifice, and, with feelings I can 
never describe, pronounced the vow which I had so long 
dreaded, in about the following words : " O Lord ! I here 
end my controversy with Thee ; I give Thee my all. From 
this moment, henceforth, I consent, and solemnly engage, 
to do all Thy known will, at all times, in all places, under 
all circumstances, according to my best ability, through thy 
grace, without any exception, reservation or delay, at 
whatever cost to myself, even though it should take my 
life." I continued in prayer and weeping for some time 
before the throne. I confessed my sin of fearfulness and 
timidity, and threw myself, as I never did before, into the 
arms of God. I felt instant strength, peace, light, and 
comfort. A mountainous burden rolled from my heart, 
and I lighted up like a vessel relieved of her too-heavy 
load. I had clone my duty, and I felt that God accepted 
me. My faith rallied, and I was wonderfully stronger. I 
had not expected the blessing I so much desired, and my 
mind did not once recur to the possibility that I might even 
then have already tasted it. I had only engaged to do all 
the known will of God in every instance, and to seek for 
the sanctifying grace till I found it, if it were to my life's 
end. The dividing-line between me and the world was now 
clearly drawn, the unmistakable landmarks set up ; and I 
was sustained by a consciousness that I was the Lord's. 

In this frame I returned to my employment with a feel- 
ing of satisfaction to which I had been altogether a stranger 
for months. Soon, however, the thought flashed across my 
mind, " What have you done ? Your vow was premature 
and rash. You knew that you never could perform the 
duties to which you are now irrevocably pledged. You 
have left no proviso, no condition, no possibility of modify- 

REV. F. G. HIBBARD, D. D. 37 

ing your course according to circumstances; and next 
Sunday you will be called upon to speak and pray before a 
congregation. You will fail, and your awful v.ow will be 
broken. You have added sin to your past course. That, 
at least, was prudent ; this is presumptuous and impracti- 
cable." Instantly I felt sinking into deep waters, and a 
horror of great darkness came over me. The temptation 
seemed truthful. It had all my past bitter experience to 
corroborate it, and I had no faith to contradict it. I 
dropped my work, and returned to the same place of 
prayer, and falling before God, wept out a prayer and con- 
fession : " O Lord ! I am wretched and helpless and 
ignorant, and totally in the power of the Tempter. Lord, 
I intended only to fulfill my duty in making the vow. I 
cannot tell whether those awful doubts are the temptations 
of Satan, or the truthful suggestions of Thy Spirit. I am 
fixed in my purpose to do all Thy will, if these suggestions 
are from Thee and I have been rash in my vow, 
oh ! forgive me, and pity my ignorance ; but if they are 
temptations, and if I have done only my duty, come to me, 
strengthen me, teach me, help me to keep my vow, and I 
will abide in it, though it cost me my life." My prayer 
was uttered from the depths, like one sinking for the last 
time in deep waters. To me all was real as eternity. I 
think I could have gone to the stake for Christ, even with- 
out spiritual comfort, if I had been assured of His will. 
My vow was made with a full expectation of losing my 
good name ; of being counted a fool for Christ's sake ; of 
being baffled and defeated, and put to shame, in my attempts 
to do my duty, but with an unalterable purpose to do all 
the known will of God. Had I done the will of God in 
making the vow? "Was I now in the line of duty ? I had 
scarcely ended my prayer of agony when the answer came. 
My soul was filled with peace, light and joy. God gave 
me " wherewith to answer him that reproached me ; for I 


trusted in His word " (Ps. cxix. 42). My way was plain. 
The Tempter left ine. I was never again attacked at that 
point. Up to that time, I had expected to be baffled in 
my attempts to pray in public ; to be a trial to my brethren, 
and a jeer to my unconverted youthful friends, and, perhaps, 
a dishonor to the common cause, on account of my weak- 
ness. But now my anxiety on these points was gone. My 
faith in God became so settled and strong, that I seemed 
to "rejoice as a strong man to run a race." I longed for 
opportunity to speak for Jesus. It is strange, but I never 
from that hour felt any embarrassment from lack of words 
or self-possession in performing my social duties. Satan 
had kept me bound ; but Christ now set me free. The 
fear of man was gone. I believe I then received the 
blessing I sought ; but as my faith was not directed to that 
point, and as I had it fixed in my mind that I was only 
entering the way as a seeker of sanctifying grace, it never 
once occurred to me that this might possibly be the thing I 



Three weeks passed in daily, hourly seeking by all the 
means which I knew, or liad reason to believe, were 
acceptable to God. My ideal of sanctification was that of 
a lad brought up, indeed, in the Christian faith and forms, 
with some elemental experience of the Spirit's operations, 
but unable to grasp questions and doctrines theologically, 
living in a retired and humble sphere, and intent only upon 
glorifying God in that sphere, without one thought or aspi- 
ration beyond. I could derive little aid from human con- 
versations. People did not explain things then as they do 
now. It was not a Sunday-school age, and the adult mind 
had not come down to the capacities of babes. And besides 
I now see that my thoughts dwelt in a region and were 
occupied with things far beyond my knowledge of words 
to express, or adequately to understand if others should 

REV. F. G. HISBARD, D. D. 39 

express them. A few helped me. One old Christian lady 
helped me much. Most did not seem to comprehend me. 
But the Lord understood me ; " and He alone did lead me, 
and there was no strange god with me" (Beut. xxxii. 12). 
He enabled me to keep my vow. I did glory in the cross. 
My peace, faith, hope, love, and purpose of mind, never 
for a moment wavered, though my emotional experience 
was not always alike. My great trial arose from the delay 
and absence, as I supposed, of that grace which I needed 
so much in order to glorify God. At the end of three 
v r eek., I was alone in the field one beautiful day of early 
spring. The clear sky, the glorious sun, the happy birds, 
and all nature, " quick, and springing into life," were but 
the symbols of my soul's experience. It was a glorious 
day within and without. I can never forget that day. I 
shall never enjoy a happier till I walk the fields of para- 
dise. As I returned homeward, while the declining sun 
was dipping low in the west, my soul full of delightful 
meditation, the thought came to me so distinctly, " This is 
a glorious day," that I answered, "Yes, it is." "You have 
been greatly blessed to-day." " Yes," I replied, with praise 
to God. " This is what you have been seeking for." " No," 
I quickly responded: "I have not yet attained." "Why 
not? what is it that you have been asking? " This "Why 
not ? " was the first occasion of directing my mind to a 
review of the nature and evidences of that blessing I was 
seeking ; and, for the first time in my life, I seemed to 
pause, and have courage to institute the question, " Is this, 
indeed, the answer of my prayer? " It took- some courage 
to admit the possibility, so far as to put it upon the ground 
of an open question. "What is it that you want?" 
seemed to be asked me. "I want victory over all known 
sin." Have you not got it ? ""Yes," I replied. " What 
else?" "I want power to perform all the known wjll of 
God." "Have you not got it?" "Yes, praise God." 


""What else do you want?" "I want to love God with afl 
my heart and soul." "Do you not?" "Yes, glory to 
God ! " These and such like questions and answers con- 
tinued to run through my mind with amazing distinctness ; 
I giving my answers audibly, as if replying to an audible 
voice, each answer increasing my faith, and my clearer 
perceptions of the nature and evidences of the work which 
I had desired, until the final question came. "Well, have 
you not, then, received the blessing you have asked ? " and 
my bursting heart answered, " Yes, I have. Blessed be 
God, my prayers are answered ; I will not doubt ! " And 
never from that hour have I doubted for one moment the 
reality of the work there attested. That was the "begin- 
ning of years " to nay soul. It was the great Passover act, 
wherein the " blood of sprinkling " procured a deliverance 
which eternity alone can adequately commemorate. I 
afterwards saw why my crosses lay so heavily on a given 
class of duties, and why it became necessary to lead me in 
so new paths, through so great conflicts (to me they were 
great), to so great victory, marking each step with tears 
and agonies and blessing. About a year after this, I was 
called to my ministerial life, and it was this intermediate 
year of special experience and activity in my boyhood 
home which I afterward saw God had chosen in anticipa- 
tion of my great work. 


I fear incautious people are sometimes made sceptical 
on this doctrine of perfect love by hearing it so often con- 
fessed that the witness of it has been lost. But is it not at 
least as often the fact in the case of justification ? So that 
it argues nothing against the. reality of the work tliat the 
witness is afterward lost, but only against the watchfulness 
and fidelity of our hearts. Blessed beyond expression was 
the period about a year and a half which immediately 

KEY. F. G. HIBBARD, D. D. fa 

followed this consecration. It may awaken surprise when 
I say that the loss of the evidence was occasioned by 
studying theology. But let me explain. When my call to 
preach was confirmed, and it became settled that that was 
to be my life-work, I immediately addressed myself to the 
task of special preparation by study. I had every thing to 
learn; and a year of preparatory study, before joining 
conference, was consecrated to severe mental labor in the 
legitimate sphere of theology. Fields of thought opened 
before me in all directions, new, indispensable, enchanting. 
The physical eifect of my intemperate study was a severe 
fit of sickness, while my mind became suddenly enlarged 
with truths which I had not time to digest or classify. My 
intellectual thirst was intensified, my ambition, aroused, my 
heart oppressed with the view of my incompetency for the 
ministry, and my resolute purpose was formed to conquer 
or die ; and I thought, if I could not conquer, I had better 
die, and be out of the way. Plistory, theology, metaphy- 
sics, biography, sacred literature, for several years, Avere 
gorged, not masticated. Strange that I did not see the 
snare ! It was not in the fact or the objects of study, but 
in my method, and in the unconscious rising of an ambi- 
tion, which I afterward saw was not wholly sanctified. 
And then it never entered my mind that any danger to my 
spiritual life could lie in the path of theological studies. 
But by being drawn oif into themes, which to me, at that 
time, were subjects of intellectual rather than spiritual and 
practical interest; by studying theology too much as a 
science and as a profession, and not enough for spiritual 
food, and immediate, practical use, my soul first became 
sensibly less fruitful of spiritual things, the fervor of my 
devotions abated by degrees, the ardor of my love became 
often chilled by criticism, and a sense of barrenness and 
want gradually succeeded to my former joy in the fullness 
of God. It was not condemnation ; I had no thought of 


departing from the old paths ; my VOAV of consecratioi .vaa 
still held as sacred as ever; but, in spite of all, there was 
an absence, and my soul often mourned, saying. "Whither 
is my Beloved gone ? " The loss of the evidence was the 
work of years, years which had their alternations of 
glowing sunshine and gloom, triumphant faith and joy, and 
despondent mourning. I could say, like Solomon, " They 
made me the keeper of the vineyards ; but mine own vine- 
yard have I not kept." (Cant. i. 6). 


I cannot follow the details of life, either in providential 
dispensations or spiritual exercises. I will only say, that 
the soul having once tasted the fullness of divine love, can 
never be satisfied with anything less ; nor will the conscience 
operate by any rule of duty below that standard. Satisfac- 
tion is a stranger to that breast which lives in a conscious- 
ness of having lost the higher life and nearer walk with 
God, and the perfect resting of faith which characterized 
former and happier days. 

In the spring of 1843, I was brought back. Oh the 
faithful love of Jesus ! He will never leave or forsake us. 
A growing dissatisfaction with myself" had shadowed and 
imbittered my ministerial life for several years, until my 
distress of mind became insupportable. Intellectually, I 
had never been better prepared to preach ; but, spiritually, 
1 seemed never so illy prepared. Week after week, and 
month after month, for several years, afforded little allevia- 
tion from the habitual despondency and discouragement of 
my heart. I looked on my right and left, for some possible 
apology for leaving the ministry; but the " Woe is me if 1 
preach not the gospel ! " hung over me, and I saw no escape. 
I sometimes asked myself, "Are not the Methodist doctrines 
and discipline too rigid, and the people too difficult to 
satisfy"? But my conscience and my education always 

REV. F. G. HIBBABD, V. D. 43 

negatived the inquiry. I opened my mind fully to one only ; 
an aged and venerable father in the gospel, whom I dearly 
loved. But what can words of human sympathy and 
advice do for one who is pining and perishing for the living 
word and power of God ? I must be newly consecrated 
to God. The old covenant must be recalled and renewed. 
Nothing but the baptism of the Holy Ghost would meet 
my case. Alas ! who can describe the difficulty of a soul 
fettered and enfeebled with unbelief and timidity in coming 
directly to God I At length, God.came near in judgment, 
and took a loved child, an only son. The sword entered 
into my soul. I knew it was of the Lord : I saw the divine 
intention, and I determined to submit, and seek a full con- 
secration to God. I cannot describe the conflict of that 
last month of wrestling before the word of deliverance 
came. My beloved wife, herself seeking earnestly for the 
sanctifying spirit, now saw the method God was talcing to 
wean us from the world and to cleanse us from our idols, 
bent over the dying couch of the little sufferer, and 
exclaimed, "O my God! is the way so narrow, so very 
narrow ? " There was no complaining ; but there was 
great searching of heart. Suffice it to say, we sought and 
found together. The blessing came at last : while at our 
evening family prayers, the usual service was prolonged 
into a season of wrestling, and our little all was replaced 
upon the altar. I felt the glorious restoration then ; but 
the full witness did not come till the next morning prayer- 
meeting at the church. 


It was the month of March. We were having a series 
of meetings, embracing a six^o' clock morning prayer-meeting. 
I was kneeling within the altar, full of blessed thoughts 
and aspirations, when the duty was presented, then and 
there, of confessing Christ in His new work in my souL 


Strange that I had not forseen this ! stranger still that ii 
should seem such a trial and cross ! For a moment, I 
thought I could not. It even seemed premature and impru- 
dent. Yet there stood the cross before me : it was mine to 
bear, and I could not deny it. But objections arose so 
forcibly, what could I do ? I said, " Lord, it will not be 
believed, and I shall only dishonor myself and the cause." 
I said, "Lord, let me wait till I go to a new appointment, 
then strangers will believe me, and I will come out and 
make the profession." . I said, "Lord, if I profess the 
blessing, I shall be expected to preach it ; and I have not 
for many years been able to preach it, except in a doctrinal 
way ; and, if my cold manner of preaching it contradicts 
my profession, it will only injure the cause which I attempt 
to advocate." I said, "Lord, if I have indeed been 
restored, let my altered life, my spirit, my preaching show 
it, and let this be my testimony." I said, "Lord, it is a 
time of great disputation in the churches on this doctrine : 
many good people disbelieve it, and I shall be set down as 
fanatical, and thus lose the little influence I now have." I 
said, "Lord, let me wait, and see if I can live it." Within 
the space of perhaps ten minutes, these thoughts passed 
through my mind with great solemnity and great distinct- 
ness. It was a moment of struggle to me, as real as life 
and death. I at length perceived that I was reasoning 
with the Tempter. I saw I was pleading for a discre- 
tionary power to do, or not to do, my Master's will. 
Already my faith was losing its firm hold on Christ. I 
came to myself, and instantly resolved to obey at any cost. 
I placed back the offering of my all, which I found myself 
half unconsciously resuming. The vow again passed my 
lips; my calmness and confidence returned ; and I waited 
for the moment, now a moment of blessed privilege, to tell 
what the Lord had done for my soul. I distinctly remember, 
that, in replacing my all upon the altar, the last item of 

REV. F. G. HIBBAED, D. D. 45 

the inventory was my good name. I did now consent to 
become " a fool for Christ's sake." We rose from prayer, 
and I fully declared what God had wrought. The work 
was done. The Tempter assailed me no more on this 
point. My soul was full of peace and joy unspeakable. 
My cross thenceforward became my delight ; my ministerial 
duties assumed altogether a new aspect ; I loved my work. 
God gave me new power to testify of his grace ; and with 
some variations of enjoyment ; yet I trust in the integrity 
of my covenant, by the grace of God, I remain until this 
day. In this grace I hope to end my ministry and my life ; 
and this alone sweetens all toil, and smooths all rough paths. 
Thus have I touched upon some points of the past; 
and the task has been at once a blessing and a trial, a 
blessing, in that it recalls some of the most precious 
memories of my life, and revives with primitive freshness, 
the hallowed vows which to-day I delight to re-affirm ; a 
trial, in that it forces me to speak of my poor sen 7 . Yet it 
is not of me, but of Christ, that I would speak. 

" Oh ! let me into nothing fall, 

As less than nothing in Thy sight, 
And feel that Christ is all in all." 


dition as 



HAVE been the subject of deep religious im- 
pressions from the period of my earliest recol- 
lections. God gave me a pious and devoted 
mother, who taught me very early my lost con- 

a sinner, and my need of pardoning mercy 

through the Tblood of Jesus. My mother, however, died 
when I was nine years old ; and her loss was to me irre- 
parable. Eternity only can reveal how much I suffered 
from the want of some one to guide my young feet into the 
way of life, and holiness, and peace. 

My convictions, although frequent and often powerful 
uniformly wore away without producing any lasting fruit 
until I was about twenty-one years old. At that time 
during the prevalence of a powerful revival of religion, j 
obtained a hope in Jesus, although it was but a weak and 
trembling one. This occurred on February 10th, 1839 ; 
though I did not make a public profession of religion until 
nearly a year after. It is no wonder, that, living in dis- 
obedience to God, I soon fell into doubts, and, for many 
months, was often in darkness. 

It seems now strange, indeed, that I could have been 


so ignorant of the way of salvation by faith in a crucified, 
but living Jesus. After uniting with the Church, however, 
I enjoyed, perhaps, about the usual Christian experience 
for many months ; sometimes rejoicing in Jesus, and walk- 
ing in the light of his countenance ; and then again plunged 
in darkness, doubting my adoption, and groaning under the 
lashes of an accusing conscience. 


About two years alter my conversion I became inter- 
ested in the subject of entire sanctification, chiefly through 
individuals and publications that fell in -my way from 
Oberlin, Ohio. Almost from the very first I had felt, at 
times, most painfully conscious that there must be some 
state of spiritual attainment and enjoyment far superior to 
any thing which I had experienced. My soul went forth 
in ardent longings for a heart " from sin set free," and a 
conscience purified in the blood of Jesus ; but I had always 
been taught that such a thing was not possible in this life, 
and I believed it. 

When, however, I became enlightened on the subject, 
and saw, from the plain, explicit teachings of God's word, 
that it was my blessed privilege, and, if my privilege, then 
of course, my most sacred obligation and duty, to avail 
myself of the precious provisions of the atonement in this, 
respect, and be cleansed by the blood of Christ from all 
sin, then at once my mind was placed in a position in 
which any real enjoyment in religion, or true and lasting 
peace, became impossible until the attainment should bo 

How could I be at rest, when I was slighting a precious 
grace which 1 fully believed the agonies of the dear Saviour 
in the garden and on the Cross had purchased for me, while 
I was living, below such a blood-bought privilege, and dis- 
honoring Christ, by neglecting so pious and palpable a 
duty ? Others may be able to answer the question satis 
factorily to themselves but, to this day, I never have. 


Then and there began a struggle in my soul, which was 
often more terribly severe than any words can describe, 
which lasted for twenty years, and never fully ceased until 
my soul was basking on the shores of deliverance, in the 
sunshine of foil salvation and perfect love. 

I met with no individual who enjoyed the blessing to 
assist me in seeking it ; but I had the Bible, and I read the 
works of Upharn, Mahan, and others, and I sought the 
blessing with great earnestness. But the more I strove to 
be holy, the more my lusts rose and rebelled. I resolved 
that I would be free ; and yet I could not break the chain 
that bound me. I resolved over and over again. I wrote 
my resolutions, and once I wrote them in my own blood ; 
but it was all in vain. Alas ! it was all in my own strength. 
I did not know how to lay hold on Jesus, and let him do 
for me what no mortal ever did for himself, -deliver me 
from, my sins. I read the journals which I wrote, the 
record of those dark years of sorrow and struggle, soon 
after I obtained my great deliverance with blank amaze- 
ment, that I could have been kept so long under the delu- 
sion of the devil. ""Why did not some one tell me," was 
my exclamation, "how to trust in Jesus, and be delivered?" 

After many months of such fruitless struggles, I at 
length grew weary and discouraged, and at times nearly 
gave np the idea that the attainment of perfect love is pos 
sible ; though I never for one moment lost the conviction, 
that a high and holy consecration to Jesus, a state of grace 
far different from any thing I had ever experienced, was 
eminently practicable, nay, a most solemn duty. 

Thus year after year wore away. I passed through a 
course of study, and entered the ministry. My experience 
was very various. Sometimes the Saviour was very near 
and precious, and I rejoiced in His salvation ; though more 
frequently I was in the dark, and almost always dissatisfied 
with my spiritual state and attainments. What infinite' 


mercy that God did not leave me to go through life in this 
halting, doubting, complaining, miserable way ! It is ot' 
His infinite grace and mercy alone that my soul has found 
deliverance. To Him be all the glory forever ! He laid 
the hand of His Providence upon me. 

Different schemes of self-aggrandizement and worldly 
good which I had formed were frustrated in succession, 
and I was reduced to great extremities. From compara- 
tive wealth I was reduced to poverty. It had been a 
favorite scheme to fix myself and family in a position com- 
fortable for life ; but all these schemes were blasted ; and 
now the question was presented, Will you forsake all anew 
for Jesus, and go again into the work of the ministry, sub- 
mitting cheerfully to all its losses and crosses, and priva- ' 
tions and toils ? The struggle was severe, but God gave 
me grace to make the sacrifice. I gave myself to Gocl and 
His Church anew with all I had or hoped to be. 

I entered a new field of labor, and was more happy in 
the work than ever before. I formed the acquaintance 
here (for the first time in my life) of a number of clear 
brethren and sisters, who professed and enjoyed the bless- 
ing of entire sanctification. I said, " Now is God's time 
for me. I will examine this question anew, and become 
fully satisfied in my own mind as to what is truth on this 
subject." I read "Faith and its Effects," other good 
books, and especially, with much earnestness and prayer, 
the Bible ; and I conversed with dear Christian friends, 
whose kindness towards, and prayers for me, will ever be 
Iield in grateful remembrance. I could not remain long in 
doubt. . I said, " This is God's truth : it cannot be gain- 
said. The Scripture testimony is conclusive." 

Then another decision followed in my own mind, just 

as clear and just as emphatic. " This blessing is for all. 

It is for me. By the grace of God, I will have it." I 

sought it with my whole heart. I sought instruction from 



the word of God, from good books, and from those who 
enjoyed the blessing. I obtained a clearer idea than I had 
ever had before what the blessing is, and IIOAV it is to be 
obtained. I saw that I must simply present my body and 
spirit a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to Gocl, which 
is nry reasonable service ; that I must lay my whole self on 
the" altar, Christ, in full faith that the altar sanctifies the 
gift; that God, simply because Pie has promised to do so, 
accepts the offering, and performs the sanctifying work. 

But to perform such an act seemed impossible. I could 
not exercise the faith. Often I struggled to do it ; but 
God, who had wrought these desires in my heart, was not 
long in performing the work. To His name be all the 
glory ! 

Monday, June 9, 1862, memorable day in the calendar 
of my being, I had observed as a day of fasting and prayer. 
I felt happy, I felt sure of the blessing ere long, because 
God had promised it. 

I came into my room at night, having spent the after- 
noon in pastoral visiting, and immediately kneeled down to 
pray. I seemed at once to be wrought upon by some 
power out of myself to make then and there that full sur- 
render of myself to God. The whisper of unbelief was, 
"I cannot do it." But it was at once suggested, "It must 
be done some time ; why not now*?" And so, almost 
before I was aware of it, my soul was struggling in the 
mighty effort to make then and there a vow of consecration 
to God, winch should include my whole being, and which 
should be irrevocable and eternal. I thought, I will write 
this vow in my journal ; and I seized my pen for that pur- 
pose, when a passage of Scripture came flashing into my 
mind. I found it by the help of my concordance (I shall 
never want a concordance to find it again), and read, " Of 
Him are ye in Christ Jesus, who, of God, is made unto 
us wisdom and righteousness, and sanctification and re- 


demption." I read it over and over with amazement. Can 
it be, I said, that I have read this over so many times, and 
never saw what was in it before ! Why, if Jesus is all 
these things to me, then surely He is every thing. He is 
all in all ; all I need, ah 1 I want ; and I could have shouted 
His praise aloud. I felt that truly I had found what I had 
BO long been seeking for ; that my soul was clear across the 
Jordan, and in the Canaan of rest. Peace flowed into my 
soul like a river, r-peace which nothing cordd disturb. It 
was indeed a glorious change. Often did I repeat to 
myself and others, " Praise the Lord ! I am in a new 
world. Old things have passed away, behold, all things 
have become new." Preaching was a new work to me, 
and has been, blessed be God, ever since. So of pastoral 
visiting, and so of laboring to bring souls to Jesus. 

It is now almost three years since these things tran- 
spired ; but they are still fresh in my memory as if it were 
but yesterday; and, although I have often come very far 
short, and, sometimes, through neglect to testify to the great 
work of God in my soul, almost cast away my confidence, 
and been brought into much difficulty, and many buffetings 
of Satan, yet I have ever found Jesus faithful to all His 
promises ; and to-day, by His grace alone, I can say that 
His blood cleanseth from all sin. My confidence in Plim is 
stronger than ever. My vows are all renewed, and my 
sacrifice is lying upon the altar, by the grace of God,' never 
to be removed. 




WAS awakened and converted to God at Mar- 
shalton, Chester Co., Pa., April 2, 1832, under 
the ministry of Rev. Levi Scott, now one of the 
bishops of the M. E. Church. Although I 
encountered much opposition from my misguided parents, 
the Lord sustained and directed me. Aided by divine 
grace, I continued steadfast, and " witnessed a good con- 
fession" for Christ. 

At length, it was impressed upon my mind, that God 
had called me to the work of the ministry. A field of 
labor being opened, I commenced my itinerant life, and 
consecrated myself to the service of God, and the responsi- 
ble duties of my calling. 

The subject of entire sanctification attracted my atten- 
tion. I was profoundly interested with it at the time of 
my ordination, when the Bishop asked me the solemn and 
heart-searching question, " Do you expect to be made per- 
fect in love in this life? are you groaning after it 1 ?" etc. 
At that moment I came very near to this great salvation. 
A little encouragement from any one familiar with the 
"deep things of God," would have been of infinite benefit 

EEV. J. 8. INSKIP. 53 

to me, and might have so modified my subsequent experi- 
ence as to have greatly increased my power with God and 
man. Often, indeed, a similar crisis has occurred in my 
life, but, alas, it was allowed to pass away unimproved. 
In two or three instances the " land of Beulah " was clearly 
in view, and with the aid of a devout instructor, I am fully 
persuaded I could have " entered in," and possessed the 
"rest " provided for the soul. 

Various influences combined to change my views of the 
doctrine, and more especially of the experience of Christian 
perfection. My mind, it is true, adhered to the doctrine 
as a peculiarity of our creed. I was supported in my ad- 
herence by a kind of denominational tenacity which led me 
to contend for the doctrine when I discarded the experience. 
The doctrine I found in all our standard authorities, and 
knowing it as a " specialty " among our Methodistic ideas, 
I was constrained to protect and advocate it on all suitable 
occasions. Notwithstanding this, I became exceedingly 
hostile to a profession of the experience. My hostility 
assumed a more reprehensible form than doubt or skepti- 
cism. It became, in fact, a deep seated and unyielding- 
prejudice, and sometimes developed in the most uncharita- 
ble criticisms upon those who professed the blessing, and 
the methods -which they adopted to promulgate it. The 
remembrance of this fact is often occasion of great humilia- 
tion before God and my brethren. I am aware I did it 
"ignorantly and in unbelief." Still the error was a very 
grievous one, and, in a certain sense, was "without excuse." 
I ought to have known better and clone differently. But 
God has graciously forgiven me. 

For nearly two years prior to the lime when it pleased 
God to bestow .this grace upon me I had been living a more 
devout life than at any former period of my history. My 
personal religious interests had been more prominently in 
view, and excited a larger measure of attention and effort 


than usual. This was not, however, with any special 
reference to the attainment of the definite blessing of purity. 
I sought after a " closer walk with God," and frequently 
was conscious of extraordinary power in the pulpit, and 
divine fellowship in the closet. My whole experience 
during this period was of the most improving and satisfac- 
tjry character. I was under the control of the sentiment 
expressed in the line, "Nearer my God to Thee nearer 
to Thee." Yet the idea of seeking entire sanctification I 
fhink did not enter my mind. I mean that I did not dis- 
tinctly and specifically have it in view, nor was it with me 
a well denned object of endeavor or hope. 

At the Sing Sing Camp Meeting, August 19, 1864, my 
wife sought and found this " perfect rest." Prior to leaving 
home she had been impressed she would receive this bless- 
ing. She was present at most of the meetings in which the 
subject of holiness was presented as a "specialty," and 
also attended and took part in all the usual services of the 
hour. Her entire time was given, and all the energies of 
her nature were aroused and drawn toward this moment- 
ous theme. On the morning of the last day of the meeting 
the Lord heard and answered her cry. The question came 
up, would you be willing to acknowledge this blessing to 
your husband and others'? She made an affirmative 
response, and " looking unto Jesus " by faith, she felt the 
" all cleansing blood " applied, and rejoiced in the assurance 
that she was made " every whit whole." In an instant the 
great transaction was done. 

The intelligence soon reached me. I cannot say I was 
surprised. Yet I was afflicted and mortified. To the indi- 
vidual who communicated the fact, I expressed myself in 
terms of the most decided disapprobation. This, however, 
only increased my embarrassment and difficulty. I could 
scarcely sometimes tell how I felt, nor what I should do. 
In the meantime my wife, wherever she went, continued to 


tell the "wondrous story," and testified that Christ had 
become to her " wisdom, righteousness, sanctification, and 
redemption," Upon returning home, she embraced the 
earliest opportunity to give her testimony to the church. 
This produced quite a sensation, and a number of persons 
came forward to the altar, earnestly seeking a "clean 
heart." The impression wrought in my own mind was 
such as led me to call on God for a larger measure of the 
influence of the Comforter, that I might be a more efficient 
laborer in the vine-yard. I was wonderfully quickened. 
My whole soul was stirred within me. Yet even at this 
moment I had not definitely determined to seek the bless- 
ing of holiness. The effect of my wife's testimony and 
spirit was such, however, as to command my attention and 
confidence. I could not but be persuaded that her expe- 
rience was in harmony with the teachings of the Father, 
and if I should attain to it my usefulness and enjoyment 
would be greatly increased. 

Matters continued in this indefinite state until the 
ensuing Sabbath morning, when I was led to preach on 
these words, " Wherefore, seeing we also are compassed 
about with so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside 
every weight, and the sin which doth so easily beset us," 
etc. In pressing home upon the consciences of the people 
this admonition, I was led to speak with great earnestness, 
and endeavored to urge them to immediate and dot isive 
action. My appeals were unusually pointed and direct. 
The interest of the hour became more and more intensified 
as the train of thought I was pursuing developed. A cul- 
minating crisis was soon reached, and in the most vehement 
manner I cried out, "Brethren lay aside every weight. 
Do this NOW." You can do it now, and, therefore, you 
should. It is your privilege, and, therefore, it is your duty 
at this moment to make a consecration of your all to God, 
and declare you will henceforth be wholly and forever the 


Lord's. I endeavored to make this point very clear, and 
repeated with increased earnestness, "Let us NOW lay 
aside every weight and the sin which doth so easily beset 
us." I dwelt upon this, and as I continued to urge the 
admonition, a voice within said, "Do this yourself." I 
paused a moment, and the voice repeated, "Do this your- 
self, and do it now." 

Of course, in the circumstances, I could consistently do 
but one thing, and that was to obey. My mind was clearly 
persuaded of the correctness of the views I had presented, 
and advised my people to adopt. Hence it was proper 
that I should lead in their practical observances ; and with 
so marked and startling a call, I could not hesitate. 
Therefore I proceeded thus : " Come, brethren, follow your 
pastor ! I am determined to lay aside every weight ! I 
call heaven and earth to witness that I now declare / will 
be henceforth loholty and forever the Lord's" Seeing that I 
had thus given myself in an " everlasting covenant " to the 
Lord, and had, so far as I could, come out and separated 
myself unto God, my faith gathered strength, and "looking 
unto Jesus," I exclaimed with a rapture perfectly unutter- 
THINE." In this act of commingled consecration and 
faith, the wondrous work was done, and I was at once 
divinely assured of its consummation. The bliss the 
peace the triumph of that hour will never be forgotten. 
Then, indeed, I felt the joy of the Lord was my strength. 
A new phase of spiritual life seemed to be revealed unto 
me, and I went forward in the path of duty with alacrity 
and vigor, such as I had never known before. 

The effect upon my congregation was truly amazing. 
Up to this time there had been no marked indication of 
any revival interest among the people. But in the evening 
of the day referred to, the altar was fiHed with penitents, 
and eight souls were happily converted to God. The work 

KEY. J. S..INSKIP. 57 

went on with wondrous success and power. Over thre& 
hundred were converted, and a large number were sancti- 
fied wholly. All the interests of the Church were invigor- 
ated, and refreshing showers of mercy and salvatkn 
descended upon the congregation for many weeks and 
months in succession. A special meeting for the promo- 
tion of holiness was held weekly in the parsonage, and 
scores there found the way of faith and purity. Such 
meetings have been a source of much profit to my soul 
ever since. 

Prior to entering into this experience I had not read 
any of the recent works on the subject. My mind, indeed, 
had become so embittered with prejudice that I was disin- 
clined to read anything upon the question. Therefore I 
was not devoted to, or embarrassed by any particular 
theory. In this whole matter I was evidently led and 
taught by the Spirit. It is, however, rather singular that 
in the consecration and faith which I practiced, I should 
have employed almost the identical phraseology used by 
Mrs. Palmer in her work entitled, "The Way of Holiness." 
Immediately after I obtained the blessing I became a sub- 
scriber to the " Guide to Holiness," and purchased the 
entire list of Mrs. Palmer's publications, together with 
numerous other works upon the "higher life," all of which 
I read with a delight I cannot describe. The Bible also 
appeared like a new book, and was so illuminated and 
precious that it seemed I had discovered a new and great 
treasure. The "promises" all appeared to be more clearly 
mine than ever before. In short, a complete and wonder- 
ful revolution was accomplished in. me, and I felt I had 
verily come into a land of corn, and Avine, and oil, favored 
with God's peculiar smile. 

The results in my work as a minister were glorious. It 
made labor very pleasant and especially those depart- 
ments of labor which previously had been so burdensome. 


I became enamored, indeed, with my. work, looking upon 
it as being done for C/trist. I had certainly always labored 
to promote His glory and the success of His Kingdom. 
This thought made every task so easy, and turned every 
cross into a blessing. I was no longer iny own, but reck- 
oning myself " dead unto sin," I lived a " life of faith," 
and went on my way rejoicing in my Master, whose 
"yoke" I proved to be "easy," and his "burden light." 
Duty became a pleasure, and my soul, filled with light and 
love, delighted to do the Master's will. 

Three years have passed away since this transpired. I 
remain through God's help " steadfast in the faith." If 
possible I am more assured than ever that the doctrine of 
holiness is true, and its experience is the great want of the 
Church everywhere. In some instances I have been 
severely tried and tempted. Yet the Lord has graciously 
aided me to endure " as seeing Him who is invisible." The 
enemy has occasionally " thrust sore at me." The conflict, 
sometime?, has been, indeed, terrible. Yet I have been 
kept safely and sweetly "kept by the power of God 
through faith." I so love my work as a Christian minister, 
that one life time appears to be too short in which to pros- 
ecute if,. I could wish my days were months, and the 
months years, that I might have further opportunity to do 
something to promote the common salvation. 

All doubt and skepticism have been removed by this 
"full assurance," and religion is a blissful 1'eality. My 
belief of its truth has become a settled satisfactory knowl- 
edge. I now know that Christ is able to "save to the 
uttermost all them who come unto God through Him," 
and that the Gospel is the " power of God unto salvation 
to every one that believeth." Christ reveals himself as my 
present, perfect, constant, and Almighty Saviour. It is 
much easier to preach, to pray, to visit the sick, and to 
comfort the dying, than formerly. I ain much blessed in 

REV. J. S. INtSKIP. 59 

leading souls to the fountain, and pointing them to the 
Lamb of God which taketh away the sin of the world. 
This always appeared to me a great honor, but now my 
heart leaps with joy at the thought that God has com- 
mitted to me a " dispensation of the Gospel," and I may 
now say to the world, " If we walk in the light as He is 
in the light we have fellowship cne with another, and the 
blood of Jesus Christ, His Son, cleanseth us from all sin." 
The Scriptures not only establish my creed, but they also 
answer to my experience. I am still "pressing on," and 
daily "grow in grace, and in the knowledge of Christ 
Jesus the Lord." To Him be all honor and praise. 

" O, tiiat the world might taste and see 

The riches of His grace ; 
The arms of love that compass me 
Would all mankind embrace. 

" His only righteousness I show, 

His saving truth proclaim ; 
' Tis all my business here below 
To cry, behold the Lamb ! 

" Happy, if with my latest breath, 

I may but gasp His name, 
Preacli Him to all, and cry in death, 
Behold ! behold the Lamb." 



N reviewing my past life, I discover no period in 
which I have not been tlie subject of deep reli- 
gious impressions. My father died when I was 
not yet three years of age, and, consequently, 
my education and training devolved entirely upon my 
mother. She was a woman of deep piety of much 
prayer, and faithfully did she discharge her duty to me. 

She was a member of the Reformed Dutch Church, 
and mildly, but firmly insisted on my regular attendance 
upon the services of the Church and Sabbath School. 
Through the influence of my mother's brother, who had 
been converted and joined the Methodist Church, I was 
induced for some time to attend the Sabbath School of the 
Halsey Street M. E. Church, Newark, N. J. Here my 
religious impressions and convictions were deepened, and 
I often purposed to serve the Lord. It was not, however, 
until I had reached my fifteenth year that I sought and 
found Christ. My sense of pardon, through the witness of 
the Spirit, was so clear and satisfactory, that I never after 
had a doubt of my adoption with God. At the first oppor- 
tunity I connected myself with the Methodist Church, and 


commenced working in the vineyard of the Lord. My 
early labors were crowned with success, and I had the 
satisfaction of seeing one after another of my companions 
brought to Christ. 

With my conversion there came a call to the ministry, 
for which I at once began to prepare not only by a dili 
gent study of the word of God, and of various branches of 
knowledge, but, also, by going out into the neighborhoods 
round about the city where I dwelt, holding religious 
meetings, and urging sinners to come to Christ. 

When I was in my seventeenth year I began to preach 
as a helper on the Flemington Circuit and for a portion of 
the three years following I was employed on this, the Haver- 
straw and Middletown Circuits, under the Presiding Elder. 

At the age of nineteen I joined the New Jersey Con- 
ference ; since that period I have been (with the exception 
of one year, when I was laid aside on account of failing 
health,) actively engaged in the great work of the Gospel 
ministry. My ministerial life has been full of labor, and 
not, thank God, without success. I always contended for, 
and strove to enjoy vital godliness and many, many 
seasons of refreshing did I realize. My delight was to labor 
in the service of God, and to see His cause and Kingdom 
prosper. Hence I built and repaired, and remodeled a 
number of churches ; labored hard in ordinary and extra- 
ordinary services; visited the people, as faithfully as I 
could, as a pastor; and, I think, I can say truthfully, 
shunned no work' which I thought would honor my Master. 
Yet, in all this, I fear there was very much of selfishness 
mingled, and almost a morbid sensitiveness to my reputa 
tion and ministerial position and standing. And too often 
I indulged in "foolish talking and jesting," which I found 
to my mortification and sorrow, were not only "not conve- 
nient," but exceedingly injurious to my religious character 
and ministerial usefulness. 


At a very early period of my religious experience, my 
mind was exercised, especially by the teachings and draw- 
ings of the Holy Spirit, on the subject of Christian holi- 
ness, perfect love. In fact, I distinctly remember that 
only a few weeks after my conversion my heart was 
s'.veetly drawn towards this subject. But it at once was 
presented to my mind, there are Brother A. and Sister B., 
old members of the Church, and they do not profess to 
enjoy this blessing,- and it would be preposterous for you to 
seek after it, or to try to enjoy it. This settled the ques 
tion in my mind, and without seeking holiness definitely, I 
aimed to "grow in grace, and in the knowledge of our 
Lord Jesus Christ." In my early ministiy, again I was led 
to feel the need of the fullness of the blessing. But about 
this time the views of some of my intimate friends (gener- 
ally then known as the "Hodgsonian theory") were 
pressed upon my attention. I thought that I had found in 
them a happy solution of all my difficulties, and, to my 
mind, the theory was truly beautiful. But, alas ! when I 
came to test it, not only by the word of God and our Wes- 
leyan theology, but, also, by my own experience, and the 
general experience of the Church of God (so far as I was 
acquainted with it), I found that it was utterly without 
foundation, and that beautiful as it had appeared to me, 
my religious convictions of truth and duty would not allow 
me to entertain, it. 

I was, then, on this question for a long period out at 
sea, Sometimes I doubted strongly whether any one could 
attain to Christian holiness in this world. Then, I thought, 
that a few persons of a refined spiritual nature, with 
pleasant surroundings and favoring influences might, per- 
haps, enjoy the blessing. And yet, again, I often thought 
that if ever I attained to this state, it would be through a 
process of severe affliction. Sometimes when my mind has 
been greatly exercised on the subject, I have even wished 


that God's afflictive hand might be laid upon me, and that 
I might pass through the fiery furnace that I might thus 
be refined. One thing which always tended to keep this 
question before my mind was this: that. in nearly every 
charge where I labored there was always some one or 
more who consistently professed this blessing, and whose 
lives re-published the testimony of their lips. I always 
esteemed, respected, and almost venerated them. But, yet, 
I comforted myself with the thought that their circum- 
stances differed from mine, and that if I ever enjoyed the 
blessing at all, it would most likely be towards the close 
of my life. Thus more than a score 'of years of my history 
and ministry passed away. About two years ago, during 
and after my return from my summer's vacation, the ques- 
tion was ever present with me, " How can I be more use- 

I was satisfied that, at the farthest, probably not more 
than fifteen or twenty years of active ministry remained to 
me, and the question was urged upon my heart by the 
Holy Spirit, "How can I make the most of those years'?" 

Of two things I was well convinced : First, That I 
could not labor any harder in the ministry and pastorate 
than I had done; and, secondly, that I could not study 
more hours or with greater intensity to prepare for the 
pulpit than I had done. What then remained? "What 
did I yet lack ? The answer came, " A deeper consecration 
to God the full baptism of the Spirit." That consecra- 
tion I resolved to make, but with a determination to say 
nothing about it, and only to let my life declare it. A . 
little subsequent to this I arranged with Brother Inskip 
and wife to come and labor for two weeks in my charge. 
They came, and his manner of presenting this subject dis- 
armed me of my prejudices, and led me on in the path I 
had before chosen. About a week after he had come with 
us, I was gently led by the Spirit fully to consecrate 


myself to Christ, and to believe that the blood of Jesua 
cleanseth me, even me, from all sin. But this was not 
until after a very severe struggle. The question came to 
my mind, "What, will you make a profession of this bless- 
ing ?" " Suppose that by so doing you are isolated from 
your brethren, and you are sent to a small and out-of-the- 
way appointment, what then?" I replied, "I can be 
happy anywhere and under any circumstances, if Christ is 
with me, and I will act up to my convictions of duty." I 
simply "believed," and I "entered into rest." The evi- 
dence of the power of the cleansing blood and of the sanc- 
tifying Spirit was just as clear to my mind and heart as 
was that of justifying and regenerating grace. And when 
I had obtained the blessing, it was the easiest thing in the 
world for me to speak of it. In fact, I could not keep 
still. But I felt just like a little child in this new stage or 
degree of Christian experience. I felt that I had every- 
thing to learn, and was willing and anxious to sit at the 
feet of Christ's saints, and learn of them. 

Since that blessed period, the 15th of January, 1866, I 
have endeavored to live near to Christ, and I have enjoyed 
very much of sweet communion with Him. And, although, 
deeply conscious of many imperfections, short-comings, and 
of occasional lapses, yet I am certain that through grace I 
have been raised to a plane of religious experience which 
I have never known or enjoyed before* At the same time 
my soul lies humbled in the dust before Him. I am 
nothing ; but Christ is everything. At times the sense of 
my unworthiness, my weaknesses, and my vileness is 
almost overwhelming ; but then my faith cordially and 
heartily accepts of Christ as my wisdom, my righteousness, 
my sanctiiication, and my redemption. Here I rest. Jesus' 
blood cleanses me. The Holy Spirit sanctifies me, and is 
carrying forward Plis work in me. All is well. 



AM constrained by the love of Christ and for 
the commendation of his rich grace, to give my 
humble testimony to the wondrous power and 
fullness of his free salvation, 
Baptized and educated in the Associate Keformed 
Church, I was early and diligently instructed not only in 
the words, but also in the great truths of the Shorter Cat- 
echism. By my faithful pastor, and especially by my most 
affectionate godly mother, and a Christian father, I was 
often led in private, as well as in the family, to the throne 
of grace, and was most earnestly and tenderly reminded 
that the vows of God were upon me that I could not, 
must not cast them off. 

When about thirteen years of age I accepted with, awe 
and trembling the sacred TOKEX which was to admit me to 
a seat at the table of the Lord. Since that solemn, never- 
to-be-forgotten hour, amid multiplied and grievious back- 
slidings and repentings, I have been seeking and often 
struggling, honestly, I trust, but most unsuccessfully, after 
a higher, better life. The record of these experiences, 


though sometimes joyful, 1 have occasionally reviewed with 
such pungent grief and shame, that I have been tempted 
to destroy at once a history of my inward life, so full of 
misery and guilt, of resolutions the most strong and ear- 
nest, made only to be violated or forgotten. "While I can- 
not forget these painful wanderings and inconsistencies, I 
delight rather to make mention of the loving-kindness of a 
covenant God, which has followed me during all the vicis- 
itudes of the past, and brought me into my present blessed 
experience of liberty and peace. 

When a youth of but fifteen, I was providentially led, 
and generously received into the family of that godly man, 
the late Divie Bethune. By his heavenly conversa- 
tion and fervent prayers, and the judicious counsels 
of his excellent wife, my languid soul was often quickened, 
and by the blessing of God upon these and other pious in- 
fluences, my feet effectually preserved from falling into the 
follies and vices so prevalent around me. In that truly 
Christian family I was not unfrequently favored with the 
society of eminent, intelligent Christians, invited to share 
its hospitalities. Among these I shall never forget the Rev. 
Dr. Ward, that devoted missionary to India, whose earnest 
prayers and spiritual converse greatly roused and profited 
me ; nor the resistless power of a timely and gentle rebuke 
from the lips of that faithful man, afterward the Eev. Dr. 
Cutler, of Brooklyn, who, on one occasion, solemnly and 
tenderly addressed me in these words : " William ! I fear 
your heart has become xoo COLD." I went to my room in 
anguish of mind, entreating pardon and grace from God, 
and forgiveness from, my friend and room-mate, because in 
the too eager pursuit of mere human learning and of col- 
lege honors, I had so failed to commend to his heart and 
conscience the power and truth of the precious Gospel. 

While a member of the Theological Seminary at Prince- 
ton, I was often urged and attracted by the thrilling 


appeals of that earnest and holy man, Dr. Archibald Alex- 
ander, and by the conversation and prayers of James 
Brainerd Taylor, whose very countenance seemed to shine 
by reason of the joy and fervor of his soul. Since then, I 
have been privileged to mingle in precious converse and 
sympathy with many whom I have loved and honored, and 
almost envied, as consistent witnesses of the doctrine of a 
full, a present salvation. My heart has often been greatly 
rejoiced and strengthened by the perusal of various admir- 
able books and publications on the same subject, and by 
labors in revivals of religion, with which God has occasion- 
ally blessed the churches under my care. 

Last spring, my attention was directed to a most con- 
vincing article in the April number of your magazine the 
reply of a minister to his Presbytery urging so powerfully, 
and with so much of Scriptural argument, the present 
privilege and duty of entire sanctification, that I was left 
utterly without excuse. In accordance with an earnest 
and long-cherished desire, I was permitted in May last to 
attend, with a beloved son, who was in a similar state of 
mind, one of your blessed Tuesday afternoon meetings. Of 
the fervent prayers, the experience and exhortations to 
which I there listened, and of the earnest spiritual sugges- 
tions and counsels afterward received from Mrs. Laukford, 
I shall ever cherish a most livery and grateful remem- 
brance. I seemed to be brought to the very gate of the 
heavenly kingdom. But, alas ! perhaps from fear of re- 
proach, or from want of entire consecration to my blessed 
Master, I did not enter. 

On my return to my Western home, I enjoyed the 
privilege of spending a Sabbath at Oberlin, and of 
listening to the preaching of one, who- accomplished and 
endured so much as a witness and expounder of the prec- 
ious Scripture doctrine of entire sanciilication. Unex- 
pectedly invited and urged to be a guest in the happy family 


of President Finney, I was blessed even beyond my largest 
expectations, in the very free spiritual intercourse enjoyed 
with himself and Ms gifted and godly wife, now rejoicing 
in the presence of that .Redeemer whom she so eminently 
loved and served. When I left that mansion of peace and 
love, I thought my mind and my heart were fixed on God 
wholly and forever ; but I did not trust fully and solely in 
the promised present power and grace of Jesus Christ. I 
dared not profess that the full salvation which I had so long 
"believed and so earnestly desired was truly mine. 

Early- in September last, I went with my wife, who had 
fully sympathized with me in aspii'ations and efforts for 
entire sanetification, to Mount Pleasant, Iowa, to avail our- 
selves of the counsel and aid of brethren, who both enjoyed 
and professed this great blessing. Spending a Sabbath 
there, I heard a precious discourse. in the morning from a 
Baptist brother, on the words, "If thine eye be single, thy 
whole body shah 1 be full of light;" clearly illustrating and 
strongly xirging the unreserved abandonment of self, the 
world and sin, and entire consecration and obedience to 
God. The afternoon we spent most delightfully and profit- 
ably in conference and prayer with Bishop Plamline and lady, 
and other Christian friends, and enjoyed the blessedness of 
commemorating with them the dying love of our common 
Lord. My desires .and purposes in reference to the experi- 
ence of entire holiness were greatly strengthened. But I 
seemed still to hear and to utter the cry, "Lo! here is 
Christ, or lo ! there," or to say anxiously, yet excusingly, 
"Who shall ascend up to heaven? that is, to bring Christ 
down from above, or who shall descend into the deep?" 
etc. I did not attend to that blessed Voice which saith : 
" The Word is nigh thee, even in thy mouth and in thy 
heart." "If thou shalt CONFESS V/ITH THY MOUTH the 
Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath 
raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved." I was 


doubtless still inclined to go " about to establish my own 
righteousness," and therefore did "not submit myself' to the 
righteousness of God" to God's simple and effectual 
method of sanctification, as truly as of justification, only by 
faith in Jesus. 

Two weeks since, I was suddenly assaulted by the temp- 
tations of Satan in a very unusual manner. For days I 
was fearfully tormented with evil thoughts and imagina- 
tions, wliich seemed to be cast like fiery darts into the 
very depths of my soul. I read the blessed Book of God, 
I prayed and .agonized ; but to li ttle purpose. Early one 
morning, in my daily reading of the New Testament, my 
eye and my heart were happily fastened upon the r^^le 
story of the leper, vile and unclean, who came and wor- 
shiped Christ, saying: "Lord, if thou wilt, thou canst 
make me clean." Matt. viii. : 2, 3. The words seemed to 
be at once revealed and apph'ed by the blessed Spirit as the 
full and fervent utterance of my whole soul. When I read 
the wondrous manifestation of the grace and power of 
Christ, " And Jesus put forth his hand and touched him, 
saying, 'I will; be thou clean,'" my heart was touched as 
by that hand of power and love. Filled with gushing, 
overwhelming tenderness and gratitude, I rejoiced in the 
blessed assurance that the experience of the poor polluted 
leper was mine: "And IMMEDIATELY his leprosy was 

On the last Sabbath our day of communion I was 
constrained, in an exhortation to my people at the close of 
the services, to refer, though with some, I fear, too much 
hesitation, to my own experience of the rich grace and 
power of Jesus. I could not refuse to testify to them that 
I beheld and recognized the mighty arm of my Redeemer 
extended to me from heaven ; I heard His voice of love 
saying, "I will help thee, yea, I will strengthen thee, yea, 
I will uphold thee, by the right hand of my righteousness." I 


have, since then, joyfully embraced proper occasions to 
confess to my brethren in the ministry, and others, the full 
power and grace of Jesus Christ to redeem from all iniquity 
to deliver and keep me from this present evil world, 
"With a humble, thankful heart, I acknowledge that Christ 
is made of G-od unto me, in my own daily cheerful experi- 
ence, " sanctification and redemption," as truly as he is my 
44 wisdom and righteousness." I well know that, like 
Peter, I may often, and, perhaps suddenly, be surrounded 
with boisterous winds and dark waters ; but, I believe, that 
He who so kindly and so promptly stretched forth His 
hand, and caught His fearful disciple, is ever able and 
willing to hold me up, to keep me from falling, and to 
present me, weak and guilty as I am, faultless before His 

In my boyhood I took the Lord Jesus Christ to be my 
Prophet to instruct me, and my Priest to make atonement 
for my sins : but in the blessed hour of my late deliver- 
ance, I joyfully accepted Him as my KING, to execute in 
me this blessed office, "in subduing me to Himself, in 
ruling and defending me, and in restraining, and conquer- 
ing all His and my enemies." 

Many years since I prepared a sermon on those precious, 
yet solemn words, Gal. ii. 20, " I am crucified with Christ, 
nevertheless, I live," etc. But the discotirse so utterly 
rebuked and condemned me, presenting an experience so 
far in advance of my own, that I laid it aside. I dared 
not preach it. "With a humble, watchful, thankful heart, 
I propose, by the grace of God, to preach this as my next 
discourse to my people, and to strive by the aid of the 
blessed Spirit to quicken and elevate them to the attain- 
ment of this, the appropriate experience of all who are 
fullv Christ's. 



HE stars are seen at their inconceivably remote 
distances because they are bright. Place 
bodies a thousand times as large as they, yet 
opaque, a hundred times as near, and no 
amount of reflected light could make them visible. Only 
the bright things can be seen from afar. And is it 
not exactly so in our natural, and in our spiritual lives? 
Not every day do we realize this truth. Some great sor- 
row comes to smite us ; and we feel the wound, and think, 
" Oh ! this will never heal." Some dark woe burns into 
the mind, and leaves a blackened cavern in the soul ; and 
we say, " Oh, the sadness of looking into that pit forever." 
A ray of joy falls into the heart, and we think but little of 
it, yet tremble lest its light shall be dim and forgotten. 
But a very little space of the journey of life carries us be- 
yon 1 the sight of the scar which that quickly healed wound 
left, and far out of the view of that dismal dark which made 
us shudder ; while with surprise and renewed delight we 
still see the steady glow of that burning joy. And as years 
bear us farther and farther away, that light seems to follow 
with equal pace, and rise as it pursues, till it shines an 
unfolding and fixed star in the heaven of our past experi- 
ence and our future hope. 


Such are three points in my early Christian experience, 
to which memory often turns, around which it will linger. 
T do not argue from these that I am a Christian, or that I 
am perfect in love. I only remember them as times when 
I was greatly blessed; when I laid myself on the altar 
wholly, and was accepted 5 and never -has the sacrifice 
been withdrawn. In many ways I may have been " busy 
here and there ;" and neglecting to watch the angel with ' 
whom I then wrestled, and over whom, Jacob-like, I then 
prevailed, may have departed for a season ; yet the altar 
has never been robbed of its burden, 

" All my soul's and body's power, 

All my memory, mind, and will, 
All my goods and all my hours, 
All I tldnk, or know, or feel." 

Let me relate some of the circumstances attending these 
three points of my life. They may profit some soul, and 
reveal to some heart a clearer view of "the way of faith." 

My conversion was in March, 1835. It occurred in a 
corner of a lot on my father's farm, where I, a boy, had 
been set to work ; and it seemed to cover the earth with 
" a light above the brightness of the sun," which was then 
sinning. During that summer, the question of my duty in 
life often came up, was pondered, and adjourned to " a 
more convenient season." Spiritual darkness gradually 
crept over my soul ; and when October came, and I was 
about to begin my winter's teaching in an adjoining town, 
the gloom could be felt in all my soul. 

One Monday morning, between three and four o'clock, 
I arose, put my school-master's books and ferule, inkstand 
and quills in my handkerchief, as many a New England 
boy, without shame, had done before me, and took my 
way on foot across the fields and woods for my Winter's 
\vork. The question came to me louder than ever: 


" What will you do for your life-work ? Will you follow 
Me ?" Oh, how dark it was in iny soul ! The shades of 
night, just before break of day, were nothing to this. Stars 
were in the sky ; but I stumbled, and tried to hasten. 
That question would it not settle itself? Could it not be 
delayed ? Thus burdened and blundering, I stepped over 
the foot of the hill that descended to the north of my 
father's house, and entered a forest full of great rocks, 
with here and there an open space of ground, having on 
its edges sapling white oaks among the rocks. As the 
gray of dawn began to fade to whiteness, my own inner 
darkness increased. Coming, at length, to a high rock, close 
to which stood a young oak, whose brown leaves I now 
hear whistling in the cool breeze of that frosty October 
dawn, I thought of Jacob going from his home, and find- 
ing God at Bethel. Something said distinctly, " Why not 
settle your question here and now ?" Said I. " O, Lord, I 
will!" Laying down my bundle, I knelt at once with a 
great load of darkness on my soul, and with the sweet eye 
of the morning star shining over my right shoulder. It 
was the last thing I saw as I fell on my knees, and lifted 
my eyes toward heaven. 

I prayed. I laid myself and all on the altar of sacri- 
fice. I promised to do any thing as a life-work, if only 
duty was made plain. I said I would give to God's cause 
one-tenth of all I should earn or receive ; and would 
always honor my God, and keep His commandments. I 
praj r ed I know not how long ; but my darkness vanished ; 
and such a light filled my soul that I thought of " the light 
of Gocl." I knew my duty then: my way was shining 
clear before me. I opened my eyes ; and there, blazing 
over the distant hill-top, was the glorious sun, to me, then, 
an emblem! of the Sun of Righteousness. Since that 
day I have had no doubt as to duty. 

The next point was also in October, and in 1838. I 


was a soplioiuore in the old Wesleyan University at Mid- 
dletown, Conn. I had a room-mate, Jennison, of most 
precious memory. He and I, with a few more, had 
walked out to a camp-meeting in Bolton, Conn. There 
Sister Ransom had exhorted, and, in fact, inspired us to 
seek after " perfect love." Jennisou soon found the faith 
that he sought ; not so with me. We returned, and the 
little " band " to which, we both belonged, Savage and 
Campbell both also ill heaven with Jennison, among 
the number, began in earnest to seek this nobler blessing. 
How we prayed and fasted, and read ! and, finally, talked 
with the sainted Dr. Fisk about it. Receiving encourage- 
ment from him, though not all the light we wanted, we 
still continued to struggle for the blessing of clean hearts. 
One evening, after our studies for the next day were pre- 
pared, Savage and I, contrary to college regulations, 
walked out of the city, northward, beyond the ferry ; and, 
at length, across the bridge over the creek, that, coming 
from the west, there falls into the Connecticut. Our con- 
versation was wholly on this one desire and purpose of our 
hearts, to be renewed in righteousness and true holiness. 
Said he, " Oh, that I could find Him here and now !" 
" Well," said I, "let us bow down, and in prayer conse- 
crate ourselves and all to Him." " Agreed," said he ; and 
beneath the open sky, in which the full hunter's moon was 
shining, we gave our souls and bodies to' Jesus. "We strngr 
gled in prayer, first one, and then the other, till neither of 
us seemed able to find another word with which to urge 
our petitions. Arising from our knees, we saw the moon 
in her brightness, and her sheen on the waters, and talked 
of its beauty, and God's care over us, and of Jesus' love, 
and goodness, and grace, we knew not how long. Oh, 
how precious did He seem, and how near ! When we en- 
tered the east door of that old college, there was that 
morning star which shone over my shoulder when I knelt 


beside the little oak on the hill in Bozrah ; and I thought 
how straight had been my road from that place to the 
river-side, where my soul had been so filled with peace 
three years before. 

It was but a few days later when Brothers Savage, 
Jennison, and I were talking and praying in our room in 
the college. We began to speak of the witness to the 
possession of the blessing of a clean heart. I cannot now 
remember any words of the conversation. The substance 
of it was, that we concluded to repeat over promises, and 
inquire why we could not, through grace, claim them 
specially at that moment. Jennison said this was what he 
understood to be "the way of faith." In a little time, it 
came to me to repeat a promise. I said, "And this is the 
confidence that we have in Him, that if we ask any thing 
according to His will, He heareth us : and if we know that 
He hear us, whatsoever we ask, we know that we have 
the petitions that we desired of Him." I had scarcely fin 
ished, when Savage said, " Why, we know we have asked 
according to His will ; is not that fact itself, knoAvn, the 
very witness of His presence to accept ?" " To be sure it 
is," said Jennison. But my heart was too full to allow me 
to speak. Jesus seemed to be there in that old college 
room, and to fill it with more than light and joy and peace. 
After some time partly spent in silence, and partly in song 
and praise, it occurred to me to say, "Why, Brother 
Savage, don't you remember how, cloAvn by the river the 
other night, we both of us seemed to be walking with some 
unseen presence 1 Was not that Jesus *?" " Oh, yes !" 
said he, "how our hearts burned within us there! He 
was there." And how many times since then has Jesus 
walked with me, sometimes in fire, sometimes in light, and 
many a time in darkness, but always in power and glory, 
and always in answer to a definite prayer, in obedience te 
a definite faith ! 



N thus supplying my experience, will not the 
reader join with me to ask, in the name of 
Jesus, that these few sentences -may prove a 
means of instruction and blessing to scores and 

I cannot review my past life, and fail to make mention 
of my precious parents. Few have been more favored iu 
this respect. My honored father, whom God's Providence 
has buried in the deep sea, and my devoted mother, who 
still lingers on the shores of time to bless us with her coun- 
sels and example, were both faithful in the domestic 
sphere. As the best evidence of their influence and labors, 
five sons and an only daughter, the entire circle, are a 
united family in Christ, and rejoice in the hope and *pros- 
pcct of rejoining our glorified father, and so constituting 
an undivided household in heaven. Oh, the luxury of an 
experience where the hearts of a large family are intim- 
ately bound to one another, and then all closely united to 
Jesus ! Let Christian parents be stimulated and encour- 
aged to labor for so desirable a result. 


"When just turned ten years of age, I realized clearly 
and satisfactorily the converting grace of God. Oh ! I 
shall never forget the 12th of February, 1838, the birth- 
day of my eternal life. Connecting myself immediately 
with the Church of my fathers, I laid it down as a rule, or 
principle, always to attend my class meeting. To a rigid ob- 
servance of this rule during my boyhood and youth, I grate- 
fully attribute the fact that I have always retained my 
place in the Church of God. 

May I commend a similar purpose and principle to 
Methodists everywhere? for I am sure that their observa- 
tion will illustrate the suggestion, that one, who regularly 
attends the class-meeting, very rarely makes shipwreck of , 
faith and a good conscience. 

At the age of eighteen, I took up the silver trumpet 
that had fallen from the hand of my faithful father, and 
began to preach, in my humble way, the everlasting Gos- 
pel. Quitting, about this time, one of the happiest of 
homes to enter the itinerant work, my excellent mother 
remarked, just upon the threshold of my departure, "My 
son, if you would be supremely happy, or extensively use- 
ful in your ministry, you must be an entirely sanctified 
servant of Jesus." It was a cursory suggestion, perhaps 
forgotten almost as soon as expressed ; nevertheless, 
applied by the Divine Spirit, it made the profoundest im- 
pression upon my mind and heart. 

Oh, the value of single sentences which any one may 
utter in the ordinary intercourse of life ! Sermons and 
exhortations are frequently forgotten ; Avhile the wish or 
counsel, simply and concisely expressed, will abide, to lead 
the soul into the clearer light. Let this fact, which will 
find an illustration in very many experiences, serve to 
stimulate and encourage even the feeblest to speak for 
Jesus. My mother's passing but pointed remark, followed 
me like a good angel, as I moved to and fro in my first 


sphere of itinerant duty ; viz., Attleborough. Circuit, Phil- 
adelphia Conference. Frequently I felt to yield myself to 
God, and pray for the grace of entire sanctification ; but 
then the experience would lift itself' in my view as a moun- 
tain of glory, and I would say, " It is not for me." I could 
not possibly scale that shining summit"; and, if I might, niy 
besetments and trials -are such, I could not successfully 
maintain so lofty a position. 

While thus exercised in mind, Bishop Hamline, accom- 
panied by his devoted and useful wife, came to Newtown, 
one of the principal appointments on the circuit, that he 
might dedicate a neat church, which we had been erecting, 
for the worship of God. Remaining about a week, he not 
only preached again and again, and always with the 
unction of the Holy One, but took occasion to converse 
with me pointedly respecting my religious experience. His * 
gentle and yet dignified bearing, devotional spirit, beautiful 
Christian example, unctuous manner, divinely-illuminated 
face, apostolic labors, and fatherly counsels, made the pro 
foundest impression on my mind and heart. I heard him . 
as one sent from God ; and certainly he was. His influ- 
ence, so hallowed and blessed, has not only remained with 
me ever since, but even seems to increase as I pass along 
in my sublunary pilgrimage. Oh, how I praise God .for 
the life and labors of the beloved Bishop Hamline ! 

One week-day afternoon, after a most delightful dis- 
course, he urged us to seize the opportunity, and do what 
we had often desired, resolved, and promised to do ; viz., 
as believers, yield ourselves to God as those who were 
alive from the dead, and from, that hour trust constantly 
in. Jesus as our Saviour from all sin. I said, "I will; 
with the help of the Almighty Spirit, I will." Kneeling 
\)j myself, I brought an entire consecration to the altar ; 
i. e., Christ, 

But gome one will say, "Had you not dedicated your 


self to God at the time of your conversion?" I answer, 
Yes ; but with this difference : then I brought to the Lord 
Jesus powers dead in trespasses and sins ; now I would 
consecrate powers permeated with the new life of regener- 
ation. I would present myself " a living sacrifice." Then 
I gave myself away ; but now, with the increased illumin- 
ation of the Spirit, I felt that my surrender was more in- 
teUigentj^specific, and careful, it was my hands, my feet, 
my senses, my attributes of mind and heart, my hours, my 
energies, my reputation, my kindred, my worldly substance,* 
my every tiling. Then I was anxious respecting pardon ; 
but now my desire and faith compassed something more ; 
I wanted the conscious presence of the Sanctifier in my 

Carefully consecrating every thing, I covenanted with 
my own heart and with my heavenly Father that this 
entire, but unworthy offering should remain upon the altar, 
and that henceforth I would please God by believing that 
the altar (Christ) sanctifieth the gift. Do you ask what 
was the immediate effect? I answer, Peace, a broad, 
deep, full, satisfying, and sacred peace. This proceeded 
not only from the testimony of a good conscience before 
God, but likewise from the presence and operation of the 
Spirit in my heart. Still I could not say that I was 
entirely sanctified, except as I had sanctified or set apart 
myself unto God. 

The following day, finding Bishop and Mrs. Ilamline, 
I ventured to tell them of my consecration and faith in 
Jesus ; and, in the confession, realized increasing light and 
strength. A little while after, it was proposed by Mrs. 
ITaniline that we spend a season in prayer. Prostrated 
before God, one and another prayed ; and, while thus 
engaged, God for Christ's sake gave me the Holy Spirit 
as I had never received it before, so that I was constrained 
to conclude and confess, 


" ' Tis done ! TLou dost tliis moment save, 

Witli full salvation bless ; 
Redemption through, thy blood I have, 
And spotless love and peace." 

The great work of sanctification that I had so often 
prayed and hoped for was wrought in me, even in me. 
I could not doubt it. The evidence in my case was as 
direct and indubitable as the witness of sonshij^received 
at the time of my adoption into the family of heaven. Oh, 
it was glorious, divinely glorious! 

Need I say that the experience of sanctification inaug- 
urated a new epoch in my religious life? Oh, what 
blessed rest in Jesus ! what an abiding experience of 
purity through the blood of the Lamb ! what a conscious 
union and constant communion with God ! what increased 
power to do or suffer the will of my Father in heaven ! 
what delight in the Master's service ! what fear to grieve 
the infinitely Holy Spirit ! what love for, and desire to be 
with, the entirely sanctified ! what joy in religious convei*- 
sation ! what confidence in prayer ! what illumination in 
the perusal of the sacred Word ! what increased unction 
in the performance of public duties ! 


Oh, that I could conclude just here these allusions to 
personal experience with the simple addendum, that my 
life to the present has answered to the description of 
" endless progression, steadied by endless peace !" Fidelity 
to truth, however, with a solicitude that other? may profit 
by my errors, constrains me to add another page of per- 
sonal testimony. 

Have you never known a sky full of sunshine, the 
promise of a beautiful clay, subsequently obscured by low 
ering clouds ? Have you never known a jewel, of incal- 
culable value to its owner, lost through culpable careless 


ness ? Alas, that so bright a morning in my spiritual 
history should not have shone more and more unto the 
perfect day; that I should, under any circumstances, have 
carelessly parted with this pearl of personal experience ! 

Eight weeks transpired ; weeks of light, strength, love, 
and blessing. Conference came on. I found myself in 
the. midst of beloved brethren. Forgetting how easily the 
infinitely Holy Spirit might be grieved, I allowed myself 
to drift into the spirit of the hour, and after an indulgence 
in foolish joking and story-telling, realized that I had suf- 
fered serious loss. To my next field of labor I proceeded 
with consciously diminished spiritual power. 

Perhaps to satisfy my conscience, I began to favor the 
arguments of those who insisted that sanctification as a 
work of the Holy Spirit could not involve an experience 
distinct from regeneration. Oh, how many precious years 
I wasted in quibbling ami debating respecting, theological 
differences, not seeing that I was antagonizing a doctrine 
that must be "spiritually discerned," and the tendency of 
which is manifestly to bring people nearer to God ! 

Meanwhile I had foolishly fallen into the habit of using 
tobacco ; an indulgence which, besides the palatable grati- 
fication, seemed to minister to both my nervous and social 
natures. Years elapsed. When I would confront the 
obligation of entire consecration, the sacrifice of my foolish 
habit would be presented as a test of obedience. I would 
consent. Light, strength, and blessing were the result. 
Afterward temptation would be presented. I would listen 
to suggestions like these : " This is one of the good things 
of God." "Your religion does not require a course of 
asceticism." "This indulgence is not specially forbidden 
on the New Testament page." "Some good people whom 
you know are addicted to this practice." Thus seeking to 
quiet an uneasy conscience, I would drift back into the old 

habit again. After a while, I began to see that the induL 


gence at best was doubtful for me, and that I was giving 
my carnality rather than my Christian experience the 
benefit of the doubt. It could not really harm me to give 
it up, while to persist in the practice was costing me too 
much in. my religious enjoyments. 

1 found that, after ah 1 my objections to sanctification 
us a distinct work of grace, there was, nevertheless, a 
conscious lack in my own religious experience. It was- not 
strong, round, full, or abiding. I frequently asked myself, 
"What is that I need and desire in comparison with what 
I have and profess ?" I looked at the three steps insisted 
upon by the friends of holiness, viz., I. Entire consecra- 
tion ; 2. Acceptance of Jesus moment by moment as a 
perfect Saviour ; 3. A meek, but definite confession of the 
grace received, and I said, "/These are scriptural and 
reasonable duties." The remembrance of my expeiience 
in Newtown supplied an overwhejming confirmation of all 
this, and at the same time a powerful stimulus in the 
direction of duty. 

"What then?" I said, "I will cast aside all pre-con- 
".eived theories, doubtful indulgences, culpable unbelief, and 
Tetrace my steps." 

Alas, that I should have wandered from the light at 
all, and afterwards wasted so many years in vacillating 
between self and God ! Can I ever forgive myself? Oh, 
what a bitter, bitter memory ! The acknowledgment that 
f here make, constrained by candor and a concern for 
others, is among the greatest humiliations of my life. If I 
had the ear of those _who have entered into the clearer 
light of Christian purity, I would beseech, entreat, suppli- 
cate, and charge them, with a brother's interest and 
earnestness, that they be warned by my folly. Oh ! let 
such consent to die, if it were possible, a hundred deaths, 
before they willfully depart from the path of holiness ; for, 
if they retrace their steps, there will still be the remem 


brance of original purity tarnished, and that will prove a 
drop of bitterness in tlie cup of their sweetest comfort. 


Eternal praise to my long-suffering Lord ! Nearly ten 
years have elapsed since, as the pastor of Greene Street 
Church, in the city of Philadelphia, I again dedicated my 
all carefully and fully to God ; the consecration, of course, 
including the doubtful indulgence. I said, "I will try and 
abstain for Christ's sake. I would do any thing for His 
sake ; and, certainly, I can consent to this self-denial that 
Jesus may be. glorified." Again I accepted Christ as my 
Saviour from all sin ; realized the witness of the sanctify- 
ing Spirit; and since then I have been walking "in the 
light as God is in the light," have fellowship with the 
saints, and humbly testify that "the blood of Jesus 
cleanseth me from all sin." 

"As ye have, therefore, received Christ Jesus the 
Lord, so walk ye in Him ;" that is, as I understand, con- 
tinually repeat those exercises or duties you performed 
when you accepted Christ as your all-sufficient Saviour. I 
received him in a spirit of entire consecration, implicit 
faith, and humble confession. The constant repetition of 
these three steps enables me to " walk in him." I cannot 
afford, even for a single moment, to remove my offering, to 
fail in looking unto Jesus, or to part with the Spirit of 


Thus I have honestly unfolded some personal experi- 
ences in connection with the doctrine and grace of sancti- 
fieation. The recital humbles me in the dust as it calls up 
the memory of years of vacillating and unsatisfactory 
religious life ; but it also fills me with the profoundest grat- 
itude for that abounding mercy which not only bore with 


me, but brought me 'to see again my privilege in the Gos- 
pel, and now, for more than ten years, has been preserving 
me in the experience, and blessing me in the profession of 
this great grace. Precious reader, I now offer you this 
testimony ; but, remember, before it meets your eye it has 
been carefully placed upon the altar that sanctifieth the 
gift, and an earnest prayer offered that it may be blessed 
to your spiritual profit. 

As you lay down this humble article, will you not for 
your own sake, and for the Church's sake, and for the 
world's sake, and especially for Christ's sake, resolve to 
be entirely and eternally the Lord's? May God help and 
bless you ! 

'My heart believes, my tongue shall tell, 

And far and near my faitli profess, 
My soul in rapturous strains shall swell, 
The fame of Jesus' faithfulness. 

" He saves His people from their sin, 

He saves me now, bless His name ! 
He sets His kingdom up within 
And shall I not His praise proclaim ? 

" Glory and honor, praise and might, 

Salvation through the wide world ring! 
Let all in heaven and earth unite, 

In praise to Christ, the Lord my Kingl 



Y seventeenth birthday was to me the period of 
religious resolve. The decision was lull and 
earnest. Being previously much devoted to 
sinful society and worldly amusements, I now 
renounced them all and gave myself up to work for Jesus, 
looking to the Church to direct my efforts, and resolving to 
be obedient to each indication of duty. I was at once 
employed as Tract distributor, Sunday-school teacher and 
exhorter, and spent much time in visiting the sick and 
dying. Being " slow to believe," my experience for some 
months was quite indistinct, but improving by gradual 
development, rather than marked by any sudden transition 
from darkness to light. Indeed, religion appeared to me 
as a, work to be performed, rather than as an experience 
to be enjoyed. That beautiful promise from the Proverbs 
was especially impressed upon my youthful mind, " In all 
thy ways acknoAvledge Him, and He shall direct thy 
paths ! " 

Clearly, as the result of this divine guidance, I found 
myself, in the year 1850, in the ministry of the M. E. 
Church. Between the doctrines of the Church and my 


own views there was entire harmony. I was especially 
delighted with the "Wesleyan theory of Christian perfection, 
and in theory heartily embraced it. 

In preaching on the subject, one Sabbath morning, I was 
met at the steps of the pulpit by a stranger, with the inter- 
rogations, "Please, sir, permit me to inquire, does your 
experience accord with your preaching ? Do you enjoy the 
grace you have offered to us this morning ? " It was with 
painful confusion I was compelled to confess a discrepancy 
which ought not to have existed. 

Soon after this it was my great privilege to be pastor 
of the family of one of our beloved Bishops. The clear 
exemplification of holiness which I witnessed in that 
Christian household gave intensity to my desires for full 
salvation, and led me to seek it as the great want of my 
soul, and the highest necessity in my ministry. In much 
prayer and self-denial I waited for the Heavenly baptism. 
And, one day, while going from Morristown, N. J., to Ber- 
nardsville, alone, at mid-day, I felt a peculiar nearness to 
Jesus, and looking up into the bright heavens I said, 
" Blessed Saviour, I do want to be entirely Thine ; I cannot 
make this heart of mine any better ; / now give it to Thee 
to be made pure, it is Thine now mould it according to 
Thine own will ! " 

The offering was accepted, and my soul filled in a 
wonderful manner with peace, light, love and power ! 

The Christian life now, to my mind, assumed the high 
and inspiring aspect of communion, walking with God. 
And with new lustre did such passages as the following 
shine, " But if we walk in the light, as He is in the light, 
we have fellowship one with another, and the blood of 
Jesus Christ, His Son, cleanseth us from all sin." Holi- 
ness, as an attainable blessing, appeared as the gjfeiid 
central truth of the Bible, around which all the precepijj 
and promises revolved in beautiful harmony. 


But I had not yet learned the necessity of a distinct 
profession of this grace. 

Occupying new positions of still greater responsibilities, 
having committed to my charge several hundreds of 
members annually, some of whom panting for the light 
and encouragement on this subject, it was my duty, as a 
Methodist pastor to give, the question, " How can I meet 
my obligation in this particular ? " became one of pro- 
found interest. Nor was it free from embarrassments. I 
could not I dared not be silent, and yet reasons, such as 
occur to almost every brother in our ministry, strongly 
discouraged the profession of it. So I resolved to try to 
diffuse the spirit of holiness, in a general way but not to 
encourage the profession. To meet more fully these obli- 
gations I also held a meeting on each Saturday evening for 
the promotion of holiness. In these meetings I read, 
talked, sang and prayed about entire sanctification as a 
blessing which might be obtained, and encouraged aspirations 
for it. . 

And, sometimes impelled by the holy Power which 
came upon me, rising superior to my prejudices against 
professing, I would say to those assembled, " I do feel all 
given up to God, and am filled with His Spirit ! " etc. 

These meetings were signally accompanied with the 
presence and blessing of Christ. Hallowed seasons ! never 
to be forgotten ! 

But the reaping was according to the sowing, though 
continued for some five or six years in the city of Newark 
and Jersey City, not one person that I am aware of was 
led into the clear light of " perfect love ! " 

All this time I believe I had some experience of the 
'blessing at least was near enough to it to feel its power, 
and4o be attracted and inspired by its glory. And often 
did I wish that God would raise up more Fletchers and 
Bramwells who would boldly declare this great salvation, 


and in the light of whose examples might be seen the 
living " beauty of holiness." Being deeply sensible of my 
own mental and physical weaknesses, and not knowing but 
that these were still more perceptible to others, and less 
understood, I feared that my testimony, if given, would 
hinder rather than advance the great cause of holiness. 

During the past year, from various causes, I had been 
less active in promoting this blessed experience. Doubts 
of the expediency of professing such a state of grace 
increased even to expressed opposition, in more than one 
instance. Severely criticising the spirit and life of some, 
making such profession, I feared that the sacred standard 
of entire sanctification was being lowered and decided 
that the best and wisest course for earnest Christians was, 
to make the consecration to God, be obedient to the 
revealings of the divine Will, and thus look for the gradual 
development of sanctification in the heart and life. 

But I was not at rest. These reasonings were outside 
of my proper sphere, and within the chilly regions of 

About two months since I was profoundly convinced 
that if I would fulfill my Heaven-appointed mission, / must 
become more definite in this matter / must become a wit- 
ness for full salvation then the power for which I sighed 
should be mine. And laying aside all prejudices, ceasing 
all criticisms on the lives of professors (deeply regretting 
that they had ever been indulged in), I vowed before 
Christ in solemn covenant, that if He would bestow His 
mighty grace on one so unworthy, and help me to keep it, 
I would be a witness of it at all times when His praise or 
the good of souls required it. Then did Pie uncover to me 
a glory I had not seen, and fill me with a peace deeper and 
sweeter than I had ever conceived. 

I could no longer doubt the propriety, or even the 
necessity of giving testimony. The difficulty was to avoid 


making this blessing my constant theme. My poor heart 
seemed thrilled and melted with the hallowing flames of 
perfect love. Salvation in glorious floods rolled through 
my adoring wondering soul. I felt a tender sweetness of 
spirit toward every living being, and wanted to tell eveiy 
friend I had ever known, " how great things the Lord had 
done for me." Intensely did I desire to draw my people 
into the same light and liberty. Blessed be God, some of 
them were soon with me rejoicing in the same grace, among 
them my own precious wife. Glory be to the Holy Trinity ! 

The rapture of emotion has of necessity, in some measure, 
subsided, returning at intervals, (generally when testimony 
is given) ; faith, too, has had to be tried but it abides firm 
in the all-cleansing blood and its blessed peace and 
strength remain, and I trust will ever remain. 

Entire sanctification now appears in my mind a distinct 
work of the Holy Spirit, standing out most prominently as 
a pillar of living light, diffusing its heavenly influences 
through every chamber of my soul. The witness is also 
as clear, and far more powerful than was the witness of 
pardon or regeneration. " The Spirit " is imparted that I 
"might know the things that are freely given to us of God." 

And with it is the deep conviction, that if this blessing 
be retained in all its light and power, there miv*t be 
distinct and unwavering testimony. 

Tn writing these deep and most sacred exercises of ray 
nature for publication, I almost tremble at the serious 
responsibility involved, from which I would constitution 
ally shrink but if they will, in the least, minister to the 
praise of redeeming grace, excite the aspiration, or 
strengthen the confidence of others the result will more 
than justify the responsibility assumed in the name of Jesus. 

Henceforth be it my highest ambition to be a faithful, 
consistent witness, to full salvation through the blood of the 



tlie Spring of 1815, in connection with a 
remarkable revival, which took place in Dart 
mouth College, I suppose that I experienced 
religion. About three years afterwards, I 
made a profession of religion hi the Congregational Church. 
Accordingly, I have been a public professor of religion ever 
since that time. During the greater part of that- long 
period, I believe that I have striven earnestly for high" 
religious attainments. For various reasons, however, and 
particularly the discouraging influence of the prevalent 
doctrine that personal sanctification cannot fully take place 
till death, I did not permanently attain the object of my 
desires. Sometimes, it is true, I advanced much, and then 
again was thrown back living what may be called the 
common Christian life of sinning and repenting, of alter- 
nate walking with God and devotedness to the world. 
This method ~of living was highly unsatisfactory to me, as 
it has often been to others. It seemed exceedingly danger- 
ous to risk my soul in eternity in such a state as this. In 
this state of mind I was led, early in the summer of 1839, 
by a series of special providences, which it is here unneces- 

PEOJ!'. T. C. UPHAM, D.D. Q\ 

sary to detail, to examine the subject of personal holiness 
as a matter of personal realization. I examined the subject, 
as I thought, prayerfully, candidly, and- faithfully looking 
'at the various objections as well as the multiplied evidences 
and came, ultimately, to the undoubting conclusion that 
God required me to be holy, that he had made provision 
for it, and that it was both my duty and my privilege to 
be so. The establishment of my belief in this great doc- 
trine was followed by a number of pleasing and important 

1. As soon as I had become established in the belief of 
present holiness, I felt a great increase of obligation to le 
holy. Many secret excuses for sin, which had formerly 
paralyzed my efforts, now lost their power. The logic in 
the case was very simple. God requires me to be holy 
now, and as he .can require nothing unreasonable, I am 
under obligation to be holy now. I could not turn to the 
right hand nor to the left. I knew instinctively and most 
certainly that God did not and could not require impossi- 
bilities. I considered Ms command as involving an implied 
promise to help me to fulfil it. I felt, moreover, that 
every moment's delay was adding transgression to trans- 
gression, and was exceedingly offensive in the sight of God. 
Accordingly, within a very few days after rejecting the 
common doctrine, that sanctification is fully attainable only 
in the article of death, and receiving the doctrine of the 
possibility and duty of present holiness, I consecrated my- 
self to God, body and spirit, deliberately, voluntarily, and 
for ever. I had communicated my purpose to no human 
being. There was nothing said ; nothing written. It was 
a simple volition ; a calm and unchangeable resolution of 
mind ; a purpose silently but irrevocably made, and such 
as any Christian is capable of making. But simple as it 
was, I regard it as a crisis in my moral being which has, 
perhaps, affected my eternal destiny. I acknowledge -that 


I took this important step in comparative darkness ; that is 
to say, clouds were round about me, and I went by faith 
rather than by sight ; but I had an unwavering confidence 
in God, that he would in his own time and way carry me 
through and give me the victory. This important decision 
was made in the summer of 1839, and about the middle of 
July. Two almost immediate and marked results followed 
this act of consecration. The one was an immediate 
removal of that sense of condemnation which had followed 
me for many years, and had filled my mind with sorrow. 
The other result, which also almost immediately followed, 
was a great increased value and love of the Bible. It 
required no great effort of reasoning to perceive that, in 
doing the whole will of God, which had become the fixed 
purpose of my life, / must taJce the Bible for my guide. As 
I opened and read its pages from day to day, its great 
truths disclosed themselves to my mind with an impressive- 
ness and beauty unknown before. And this result, inde 
pendently of the aid implied in the biblical promise that 
those Avho do the will of God shall understand "his commu- 
nication, was what might have naturally and reasonably 
been expected. Before this time, reading every where my 
own condemnation, I had insensibly but voluntarily closed 
my eyes to the doctrine of present holiness, which shines 
forth so brightly and continually from the sacred pages. 
But noAv I found hoh'ness every where, and I felt that I 
began to love it. 

2. I now proceed to mention some other changes of 
mind which I soon passed through. In December of this 
year, 1839, I visited the city of New York on business, 
which brought me into communication with certain persons 
who belonged to the Methodist denomination. I was 
providentially led to form an acquaintance with other 
pious Methodists, and was exceedingly happy in attending 
a number of meetings which had exclusive reference to the 

PROF. T. C. UPHAM, D.D. 93 

doctrine of holiness and to personal holy experience. In 
these meetings I took the liberty, although comparatively a 
stranger, to profess myself a believer in the doctrine of 
holiness and a seeker after it. And I found myself greatly 
encouraged and aided by the judicious remarks, the prayers 
and the sympathies of a number of beloved Christian 
friends. As I now perceive, the great difficulty at this 
time in the way of my victorious progress was my igno- 
rance of the important principle, that SANCTIFICATION, as 
well as justification, is by FAITH. By consecrating myself 
to God, I had put myself into a .favorable condition to 
exercise faith ; but I had never understood and felt the 
imperative necessity of this exercise, viz., of FAITH -as a 
sanctifying instrumentality. My Methodist friends, to 
whom this view was familiar, gave me, in the spirit of 
Christian kindness, much instruction and assistance here, 
for which I desire to be grateful to them. I found that I 
must give up the system, already too long cherished, of 
walking by signs, and manifestations, and sensible experi- 
ences, and must commit every thing, in light and in dark- 
ness, in joy and in sorrow, into the hands of God. Real- 
izing, accordingly, that I must have greater faith in God 
as the fulfiller of his promises, and as the pledged and 
everlasting portion of those who put their trust in him, and 
aided by the kindness and supplications of Christian 
friends, I in some degree (and perhaps I may say in a very 
considerable degree) gained the victory. I shall ever rec- 
ollect the time. It was early on Friday morning, the 27th 
of December. The evening previous had been spent in 
deeply interesting conversation and in prayer on the sub- 
ject of holiness, and with particular reference to myself. 
Soon after I awoke in the morning, I found that my mind, 
without having experienced any very remarkable manifes- 
tations or ecstacies, had, nevertheless, undergone a great 
moral revolution. I was removed from the condition of a 


SERVANT, and adopted into tliat of a SON. I believed and 
felt, in a sense which I had never experienced before, that 
my sins were all blotted out, were wholly forgiven ; and 
that Christ ~\vas not only the Savior of mankind in general, 
but my Christ, my Savior in particular, and that God was 
my Father. As I have observed, I had no ecstacy^.but 
great and abiding peace and consolation. 

3. I mark here another step in the progress of this im- 
portant contest. Under the influence of the feelings which 
I have just described. I consecrated myself anew to God in 
a more specific and solemn manner. I now made a writ- 
ten record of my consecration, which I had not done 
before. But while it seemed to me that I sincerely 
endeavored to give up all, I was unable as yet, in conse- 
quence probably of some lingering remains of unbelief, or 
because God, in his wise sovereignty, was pleased to try a 
little longer the faith which he had given me, to speak 

confidently of my SANCTIFICATION. I would take the lib- 
erty to say here, that I do not consider CONSECRATION and 
SANCTIFICATION the same thing. Consecration is the incip- 
ient, the prerequisite act. It is the laying of ourselves upon 
the altar ; but it is not till God has accepted the sacrifice, 
and wrought upon us by the consuming and restoring 
work of the Holy Spirit, that we can be said to be sancti- 
fied. It is true that the one may immediately and almost 
simultaneously follow the other ; and this will be the case 
where faith in God is perfect. But this was not the case 
with me. But I was now, however, by the grace of God, 
in a position where I had new strength, and could plead 
the promises with much greater confidence than formerly. 
God had given me great blessings, such as a new sense of 
forgiveness, increased love, a clear evidence of adoption and 
sonship, closer and deeper communion with himself, but I 
felt there was something remaining to be experienced. 

In this state of mind, not having fully attained the 

PEOR T. C. UPHAM, D.D. 95 

object of my expectations and wishes, but still greatly in 
advance of my former Christian experience, and with a 
fixed determination to persevere, I left the city of New 
York about the middle of January, 1840. Immediately 
.after my arrival at my residence in the State of Maine, I 
un^ed with some Methodist brethren in establishing a 
meeting similar to those which had benefitted me so much 
in New York, for the purpose of promoting personal godli- 
ness, and which was designed to be open to persons of all 
denominations of Christians. This meeting was very en- 
couraging to me and others. Nevertheless, I was not able 
for about two weeks to profess the personal experience and 
realization of the great blessing of holiness as it seemed to 
be experienced and realized in others. The principal diffi- 
culty, as I daily examined my heart to see how the case 
stood between my soul and God, seemed to be a conscious- 
ness, while other evils were greatly or entirely removed, of 
the remains "of SELFISHNESS. Indeed, at this particular 
time, the selfish principle, or rather the principle of self- 
love, in its inordinate and unholy exercise, seemed to be 
stimulated to unwonted activity. The remains of every 
form of internal opposition to God appeared to be centred 
in one point and to be prosecuted in one aspect. I do not 
know that I was ever more troubled, during so short a 
space of time, with feelings of this nature. I do not mean 
to say that I was more selfish at this time than ever be- 
fore ; by no means. But the existence and horrible nature 
of this state of mind were more fully brought to view. I 
took this encouragement, however, tha,t God was perhaps 
now showing me, as he often does when he is about to 
bless with entire holiness of heart, the very root of evil. 
And I was sincerely desirous to see it and to know it, that 
it might be slain in his presence. The good hand of the 
Lord was pleased to sustain my faith in this sharp contest. 
My continual prayer to God was that He would enable me 


to love Him with all my heart. I knew not fully what the 
nature of perfect love was ; but my prayer was that this 
love, whatever might be its nature and its inward manifes- 
tations, might in God's time and way be realized within 
me. And in the answer to this prayer, whenever it should 
be given, I confidently foresaw the termination of ^his 
internal conflict. For selfishness can never exist in union 
with perfect love. 

On Sabbath evening, the 2d of February, I was greatly 
afflicted in mind ; tossed to and fro as in a tempest ; and 
it seemed to me that I could not easily stand where I was, 
but must either advance or retreat. But God's grace was 
sufficient My faith remained unshaken ; and, on Monday 
morning, I thought I could say with great calmness and 
assurance, Thou hast given me the victory. I was never 
able before that time to say with sincerity and confidence, 
that I loved my heavenly Father with all my soul and with 
all my strength. But, aided by divine grace, I have been 
enabled to use this language, which involves, as I under- 
stand it, the true idea of Christian perfection or holiness, 
both then and ever since. There was no intellectual 
excitement, no veiy marked joy, when I reached this great 
rock of practical salvation. The soul seemed to have 
gathered strength from the storm which it had passed 
through on the previous night; and, aided by a power 
from on high, it leaped forward, as it were by a bound, to 
the great and decisive mark. I was distinctly conscious 
when I reached it. The selfish exercises which had 
recently, and, as it were, by a concentrated and spasmodic 
effort, troubled me so much, seemed to be at once removed ; 
and I believed, and had reason to believe, that my heart, 
presumptuous as it may appear to some to say it, Avas now 
purified by the Holy Spirit, and made right with God. I 
was thus, if I was not mistaken in my feelings, no longer 
an offering to the world, but SANCTIFIED UNTO THE LOKD ; 

PROF. T. C. UPHAM, D.D. 97 

given to Him to be His, and no longer my own ; redeemed by 
a mighty power, and filled with the blessing of "perfect love." 

4. The enemy might now be said to be cast out of the 
interior of the castle. Nevertheless, he has never ceased 
his hostility. He has laid his snares and presented hig 
temptations. It would be presumption to assert positively 
that I had never in any case, nor for any length of time, 
yielded to his power. But I can testify abundantly to the 
goodness of God's grace, that he has heard the voice of 
my prayer, and iri a wonderful manner preserved me. 
Certain it is that my spiritual life has been a new life. 
There is calm sunshine upon the soul. The praise of God 
is continually upon my lips. 

T have continually Avhat seems to me to be the "WITNESS 
of the Holy Spirit ; that is to say, I have a firm and abid- 
ing conviction that I am wholly the Lord's ; which does 
not seem to be introduced into the mind by reasoning, nor 
by any methods whatever of forced and self-made reflec- 
tion, and which I can ascribe only to the Spirit of God. 
It is a sort of interior voice, which speaks silently but efFec- 
lively to the soul, and bids me be of good cheer. At 
times, especially on the 14th of February, 1840, I experi- 
enced some remarkable operations on my mind, which 
made a profound and lasting impression. Language would 
be but a feeble instrument in detailing them, and I will not 
attempt it. Indeed I do not know but I must say with 
the Apostle, " whether in the body or out of the body, I 
cannot tell." But in view of what I then experienced and 
have experienced at other times, I cannot help saying with 
the Apostle, " God hath also sealed us, and given us the 
earnest of the Spirit in our hearts." 

I could speak of many remarkable deliverances and 

supports in time of mental trial. God has ever been with 

me, in time of trouble, a "faithful God." But these and 

many other things which have called fortlmthe deep grati- 



tude of my heart, I am compelled to omit. I cannot 
refrain from saying, however, that almost from the very 
moment of my obtaining the victoiy over those selfish feel- 
ings which have been spoken of, I was distinctly conscious 
of a new but powerful and delightful attraction towards 
the Divine mind. This, I believe, is a common form of 
interior experience among those who have enjoyed the 
blessing of saiictification. I perceived and felt very dis- 
tinctly that there was a central existence, full of ah 1 glory, 
towards which the Spirit was tending. I could realize the 
meaning of the Psalmist, " As the hart panteth after the 
water-brooks, so panteth my soul after thee, O God." I 
felt like an imprisoned bird, when the string is cut that 
bound it to the earth, and which soars upwards and spreads 
its wings to the skies. So conscious have I been that inor- 
dinate self-love has been the great cause of the separation 
between my soul and God, that the very idea of self as 
distinct from God is almost painful to me. "When self is 
destroyed, the divine union, which sanctified hearts only 
know, takes place. If I know any thing, I know most cer- 
tainly that the true resting place of my soul is and must 
be in the infinite mind ; that it is not and cannot be any 
where else. Perhaps no part of the Sciiptures, during the 
more recent periods of my experience, has more affected 
me, than the prayer of the Saviour for his disciples, " That 
they ah 1 may be one, as thou, Father, art in me, and I in 
Thee, that they also maybe ONE IN us." It is difficult for 
me to conceive of any heaven but God's presence ; of any 
hell but his absence. I realize that the cup of my happi- 
ness is full, whatever may be my personal trials and sor- 
rows, whenever and wherever my heavenly Father is glori- 
fied in me. Accordingly it is ray earnest and constant 
prayer, that my will may be wholly and for ever lost in 
The will of God, and that I may never know self any more, 
except as the instrument of divine glory. 



URINGr the summer and autumn of 1844, emi- 
gration began to push vigorously towards the 
central portion of Wisconsin. The Rock-river 
Valley had already become the theme of con- 
versation, and the object of interest to the settlers. Each 
wave of population bore its eager burden still farther on ; 
until early in July, among others, we found our resting- 
place at Wanpun. Having made our selection to embrace 
as much prairie, woodland, and water-power as we could 
well encompass, our first duty was to prepare a shanty as 
a dwelling-place ; and our next, to provide means of sub- 
sistence. In connection with opening of farms, we soon 
entered upon the erection of a saw-mill ; and a competence 
blessed our household. Religion consecrated her altar in 
the " shanty," as the close of the first day saw it com- 
pleted, and the shades of evening mantled the unpretend- 
ing evidence of the march of civilization. A walk of 
twenty miles to attend a quarterly meeting at Fond du 
Lac secured the attendance of a regular itinerant Rev. 
Joseph Lewis, at Wanpun to organize a class. The class 
consisted at first of six members, Rev. Silas Miller, a 
local deacon at that time ; his wife, Eunice ; his daughter. 


Mrs. Malvina F. Hilyar, and her husband, Henry L. ; the 
second son, Ezekiel T. Miller, who was made class-leader ; 
and the present writer, a younger son, then an ex> 
horter. With the increase of settlements, there came an 
increasing demand for ministerial labor. Until early in 
the summer of 1845, these calls became so pressing, that 
they largely embarrassed our business arrangements. A 
consultation was held ; and it was finally decided that the 
writer, being then twenty-two years old and single, could 
leave home better than the father. It was then beh'eved 
to be only a temporary provision, until men could be 
obtained from abroad. But how little do we know of the 
future ! A few weeks were spent at Brothertown among 
the Brothertown people, in the absence of the missionary ; 
and, at the close of the summer, I returned to Fond dn 
Lac, in which charge Wanpun was included, and was 
licensed to preach, and recommended to Conference. 

My first charge was called Green-lake Mission, and 
included Ceresca (now Kipon) and Wanpun. When I 
inquired of the presiding elder, Rev. William H. Sampson, 
as to the boundaries of my charge, he said, " Fix a point 
in the centre of Lake Harican, and strike a line to the 
north star, and another to the Kocky Mountains, ; and you 
will have your eastern and southern boundaries." To 
these tAvo appointments others were added, imtil in due 
time the charge numbered twenty-four: The spirit of 
revival came down among the people, and many were 
added from month to month ; until, at the close of the 
year, the Lord possessed the laud. 

But I took my pen more especially at the present 
moment to refer to an item of personal experience, which 
has already been to my mind like Jacob's Bethel. 

My large circuit, when fully organized, required long 
journeyings, which I mostly performed on horseback in 
summer, arid sometimes in cutter during the winter. 

REV. S. MILLER, D. D,. 1Q1 

Sometimes my ride on the Sabbath would be forty miles 
long, and afford the pleasure of preaching four times. On 
one of these excursions, I became very much exercised on 
the subject of Christian holiness. I had previously given 
the subject special thought ; but now it seemed to assume 
an importance with which I had never clothed it before. 
Not only did the teachings of our standards bear an 
unusual clearness, but my heart began to realize an 
impressiveness I had not felt before, to the same extent. 

I preached on the subject at my morning appointment ; 
and as I swept over the prairie some ten miles, in the face 
of a driving snow-storm, to my noonday appointment, I 
resolved to preach on the same subject again. I did so, and 
with much better satisfaction to myself. Twelve miles more 
of storm, and I was again before a congregation to preach 
the unsearchable riches of Christ ; and I am free to say, I 
had become so full of my theme, it seemed to me that this 
alone could be my subject ; and hence, though changing 
my text, I discoursed on gospel purity, showing that 
experimental religion presents itself to the conception of 
the mind under three clearly-defined ideas, justification, 
regeneration^ and sanctification. The drift of thought ran 
on this wise : By justification, in this connection, we mean 
simply the pardon of sin; and the man who finds this 
grace stands as fully accepted before the law, through 
Christ, as though he had never sinned. By regeneration, 
we mean that radical change of man's moral and spiritual 
condition which subjects all the faculties and powers of the 
soul to the control of the Divine Spirit. 

The work wrought in the heart by the Spirit includes 
not only the entire subjugation of the " man of sin," but 
the introduction of the spiritual reign of Christ. This 
change is so radical, that it may well be said, " Old things 
have passed away, and all things have become new." 
These states of grace, wrought at the same moment, we 


ordinarily call conversion; and they are attested to the 
heart by the witness of the Spirit. If the subject of them 
shall " go on unto perfection," the Spirit will lead him 
" into all truth." The justified person need not backslide 
in order to have a sense of his need of sanctification. 
Nay, he must not backslide if he would have either a clear 
conception of the great blessing, or even a drawing towards 
it. If he should be faithful to the grace already received, 
the Spirit will enlighten him, and lead to the discovery of 
new fields, as the astronomer rests his calculations on the 
worlds already discovered when he peers into the unexplored 
regions beyond. The increase of spiritual illumination will 
reveal conditions, both as to himself and the economy of 
grace, of which he had no adequate conception before. 

The moral perception, thus quickened by the Spirit, 
will furnish painful revelations as to himself. He will 
discover that there linger still some remains of the carnal 
mind. Pride, the love of the world, selfishness, self-will, 
and sometimes even anger or other evil passions, will begin 
to stir in the heart. The revelation will awaken alarm ; 
and often the temptation will follow that he is not a 
Christian at all, or these motions of sin would not be 
realized. But there need be no alarm. The evidence of 
conversion is not wanting ; yet there needs to be an addi- 
tional work to secure entire freedom from sin. This 
additional work is sanctification. The old carnal nature 
is not entirely renovated and made pure. Though the 
tree is cut down, the roots show their remaining vitality 
by sending np the shoots around the old stump. The 
"mightier" than the "strong man armed" must come, 
and pluck tip by the roots. When the evil piinciple is 
thus plucked out and destroyed, the blessed Christ holds 
the heart without a rival ; the graces of the Spirit now 
become planted in the garden of the Lord, where neither 
brier, thorn, or thistle grows. 

REV. S. MILLER, D. D. 103 

Do any ask, " Is this perfection 1 " "We answer, Yes . 
not that absolute perfection which admits of no growth or 
expansion, for none but the Infinite can know such a per- 
fection ; but such a state as casts out sin, the evil principle 
which has retarded the growth of the soul, and has now 
planted in the genial soil, all the seeds of righteousness. So 
far from being opposed to growth, such perfection intensi 
lies the agencies of growth. A sanctified soul will grow 
faster than any other, inasmuch as such soul is relieved 
of all hinderance, and also enjoys in richer ineasure all the 
conditions and agencies of growth. The sermon closed 
with an exhortation to " go on unto perfection." 

At the close of the service, a good sister referred in 
very earnest terms to the discourse, and was especially 
grateful for the ministry of a man who evidently under- 
stood so much about the deep things of God. Instantly. 
the thought passed my. mind, "Ah, yes! but there must, 
after all, be a great difference between merely understand- 
ing the theory, and knowing ' the deep tilings of God 'i n the 
heart." This thought troubled me. It came back again 
and again, and often resolved itself into the other question : 
" How can you teach others what you do not know your- 
self? " 

The hasty supper was eaten, and I was away, as I had 
ten miles to my evening appointment across the prairie. 
The snow was still falling moderately, but borne on a 
driving wind, which was rendering the going heavy and 
the path invisible. As my noble horse headed towards 
home, my next appointment, he seemed to go with the 
wind ; but, for a time, I seemed scarcely to heed him, as 
my thoughts were busy. The question came with still 
increasing force, " How can you preach to others what 
you do not know yourself? " At length I resolved ; and, 
scarcely stopping to measure the movement, or estimate 
the consequences, I was on my knees by the side of the 


cutter, engaged in prayer. My first conscious thought of 
my surroundings was awakened by the wrestling of niy 
horse as my right hand held him firmly by the lines. Then 
came the suggestion, " This is a very unpropitious time to 
settle a matter of this importance. "With a fractious horse 
by the rein, a terrible storm sweeping over the bare prairie, 
filling the already blind snow-path, you had better defer 
the matter for the present." My reply was, " It is time 
this matter were settled, and I propose to settle it now." 

" But the snow-path is nearly filled ; and you will lose 
your way, and perish." I still replied, " It is time this 
matter were settled, and I propose to settle it now." 
"But it is getting dark, and your congregation will be 
waiting for you. You had better go on and fill your 
appointment, and then attend to this matter." The Lord 
helped me to reply again with still greater emphasis, " It 
is time this matter were settled; and God helping, it shall le 
settled now." Instantly the light broke, and I Avas able " to 
reckon myself dead unto sin, but alive unto God through 
Jesus Christ my Lord." Feeling assured I had learned by 
happy experience the power of the blood to cleanse from 
all sin, I was found in due time at my appointment, 
preaching from the text, " He is able to save to the utter 
most all who come unto God by him." 



the year 1820, 1 was suddenly and powerfully 
awakened to a sense of guilt and sin, and that 
day, at seven o'clock in the evening, I was as 
powerfully regenerated ; my evidence of accept- 
ance was without a doubt. I was careful to obey eveiy 
impulse of duty, and in a few months became deeply 
impressed, that I must surrender the balance of my life 
to the work of the Gospel Ministry. These impressions 
ultimately ripened into a satisfactory conviction of positive 
duty. I went about the town of my residence visiting the 
sick and dying, and several sick and appointed unto death 
were happily converted to God, and died in great peace. 

I was invited, at length, to hold a religious meeting on 
the Sabbath, and to take a text. I moved forward at 
every opening door that was presented, without my own 
agency, and from this beginning was constantly prompt to 
preach, and acquiesced in all that I could. As I looked 
forward to a life of toil in the great and sacred calling, I 
was constantly thrown upon myself to investigate the 
motives which impelled me to action. And the more 
severe the scrutiny, the more vividly were developed the 
remains of depravity. My pride of heart was discovered 


by the opposite effects resulting from a discharge, of religi- 
ous duties. If greatly assisted 1 was exalted, if otherwise 
I was severely mortified. This, with various other dis- 
coveries of inbred corruption produced painful and deep 
searchings of heart. These views, together with the sacred- 
ness of the calling before me, wrought powerfully upon my 
mind. I was in actual distress of spirit, and thus brought 
into a state of " Hungering and thirsting after Righteous- 
ness." I saw God to be holy, Heaven to be holy, angels 
to be holy, the spirits of just men to be holy, and that I 
must be so myself, or never secure a lot and part with 
those holy ones. And 0, how much I needed this grace 
in order to understand myself, and to preach a holy 

And especially did I need this, as I was so very 
deficient in all the outward and literary qualifications for 
the Gospel ministry. 

The idea seemed preposterous for me to engage in 
reforming others, without being fully reformed myself. 
About this time I went to Boston and spent a Sabbath in 
the city, heard good and excellent preaching. But, what 
interested me most was, to be permitted to attend a 
general Band meeting, at the Broomfield Street Church. I 
could not have been introduced into a more welcome, 
though to me new scene the influence of that meeting 
was greatly encouraging to my panting and longing heart. 
Such manifest depths of devotion, such 'simplicity of spirit, 
and strength of confidence in God, I had, up to that 
hour, been a stranger to. 

I soon after was induced by my presiding elder to 
attend a Camp Meeting about to be held at Sandwich, 
N. H. ; this was the first instance of my attendance upon 
such an occasion. At first the scene was novel, and I was 
too much under the influence of curiosity. But, after a 
day or two, I heard a sermon on the subject of Purity of 

REV. A. D. MERRILL. 107 

heart, which was as balm -to my longing spirit. I wept, I 
sighed. I panted after God, as the heart panteth after tha 
cooling water-brook. -I felt most perfectly subdued in 
heart, and the presence of God was so manifest, that I did 
not wish to move or speak, lest I should disturb that awful 
sense of God's renovating presence and power to save from 
all sin. Under this gracious and overwhelming influence 
the Saviour .was presented to the eye of faith, suspended 
upon the cross; He looked upon me and smiled, that 
instant I yielded my soul, body and' spirit up to Him, to 
live, to die, to obey, to suffer, or to reign with Him for 
ever. Christ was my only hope, my righteousness, my 
all and in all. "With that smile I felt a renovating influence 
pervading soul and body, and thus felt cleansed from all 
unrighteousness, the assurance then given that I was 
wholly the Lord's surpasses ah 1 description, language is too 

poor to set it forth, and with the poet I could exclaim ! 


" The promise stands forever sure, 
And we shall in Thine image shine, 
Partakers of a nature pure, 
Holy, angelical, divine, 
In spirit join'd to Thee, the Son, 
As Thou art with the Father, one." 

My -Rill was lost in His when the Blood of the Lamb 
was applied to my heart. I could say and feel, to live, to 
die, to suffer, to reign, despised or respected, poor or 
supplied, I could leave all to His Sovereign sway to choose 
a~nd to command. I could never adopt such language 
before, and yet it was so reasonable, so perfectly proper to 
place my entire being, destiny, whatever I had or was, or 
ever should be, at the supreme disposal of unerring 
wisdom and superlative goodness. O, the union with the 
infinite Father, Son, and Holy Spirit the altogether 
lovely a heaven below to go to Heaven in. I felt as 


docile as a lamb ; my peace was steady, my hope full of 

From this blessed epoch, preaching, praying, believing 
was easy, the burden was light. Nothing so pleasant, so 
desirable as to abide in Christ as the branch is in the vine. 
Moreover, from this period my usefulness became greatly 
augmented, and great was the gathering of the people unto 
our blessed Redeemer. 

This Divine Power has been my constant attendant 
for forty-five years ; it has given character to my whole 
subsequent history, and bless God it does not forsake me 
in old age. 'An incident occurred as soon as this grace 
was mine ; I asked my blessed Saviour what He had for 
me to do at that Camp Meeting? I felt instantly directed 
to a neighboring tent, where there was something to be 
done. I went, and on reaching the place there were two 
persons there. I at first felt a check, and thought my im- 
pression was from the enemy. But I resolved to know if 
it was from the Spirit of the Lord, or from the evil spirit. 
So I asked the two (they were both young ladies) whether 
they enjoyed religion ? I found them under awakenings, 
so I collected in a few Christians to join me in prayer for 
their salvation. I took the case of one of them to the 
Lord in faith, and in less than a moment I became so con- 
vinced of her freedom from guilt, that I exclaimed at the 
top of my voice, the work is done ! the work is done ! 
She broke forth in shouts of praise to God for delivering 

Instantly, the other asked imploringly, can you beg for 
me in faith ? Yes, I replied. "We bowed, and in precisely 
the same manner of the first, she came out praising God. 
After this short but thorough work I listened with great 
delight to their developments of experience ; they were 
both school teachers. I never saw them before then, nor 
have I ever since. 



HEN I was converted, I had a very bright and 
satisfactory experience. So powerful were my 
exercises, and so great and thorough the 
change, both outward and inward, that I 
never could indulge in doubt as to the reality of the 
gracious work. I knew that I had passed from death 
unto life, by all the various evidences which usually mark 
that change. But my course was unsteady, with frequent 
alternations of light and darkness, of faith and unbelief, of 
joy and depression. 

After joining the Church, and enjoying its privileges 
for, perhaps, three months, I went away from home to a 
distant town, to commence my preparatory studies for the 
ministry. Here, removed from home, Church, and pas- 
toral influences, and surrounded by those who had much 
of the form, but little of the power of godliness, I began tc 
lose my first love to Christ. Gradually I fell into a state 
of heart-backsliding. 

In this state I remained shorn of my spiritual strength, 
under a sense of condemnation, and in darkness, for about 
seven or eight years. I retained my membership in the 
Church, continued my studies, with the ministry in view, 


and in some measure kept up outward observances. I was 
often distressed about my condition, and deeply sensible of 
my backslidings ; and occasionally I made spasmodic efforts 
to break away from my bondage and darkness, and get 
back to Christ. But I did not succeed, and I was quickly 
discouraged. It seems to me that my experience was pre- 
cisely that delineated in the seventh chapter of the Epistle 
to the Romans. I longed for deliverance, but knew not 
how to get it. I have since learned how any backslider 
may quickly escape and regain his first love, but then I 
knew not the steps to take. 

Tvi t^e Providence of God I became deeply afflicted, 
and was carried through an humbling process of trial for 
several months. Having a deep sympathy for the enslaved 
and oppressed free colored people in our land, I devoted 
myself, for a time, in making efforts to arouse the public 
mind in relation to their wrongs. In this I met an opposi- 
tion, which everywhere covered me with obloquy and con- 
tempt. This and other trials made me feel the need of ihe 
Saviour's presence and help. I began to think of Christ 
as a sympathizing Saviour, as the High Priest who can be 
touched with the feeling of our infirmities. The declara- 
tion that He "was in all points tempted like as we are," 
was soothing and precious to my troubled spirit. About 
this time I became earnestly engaged in a revival of reli- 
gion. My soul became burdened with unutterable desires 
for the salvation of sinners. I began, also, to study the 
Scriptures, which before I had greatly neglected. I was 
now restored from my wanderings, and was living a life of 
earnest prayer. Sometimes I would rise in the night to 
pray for souls. 

One day, after a special season of fasting and search- 
ing niy own heart and life, and renouncing all that I saw 
to be contrary to the will of God, I was striving to prevail 
in prayer, when the Saviour was revealed to me in such a 


wonderful manner that I was enraptured, and filled with a 
heavenly ecstacy, which continued for about a week, and 
though the brightness of it was then obscured by a severe 
temptation, yet the effects and the savor of it, has remained 
through all the following years. That vision of Jesus had 
given my soul a heavenly relish, which impelled me to seek 
after God. / 

The summer and fall which followed, bore witness to 
frequent days of fasting and prayer, with much searching 
the Scriptures. On a day specially set apart to seek the 
Lord, I was led to search my whole life from my earliest 
recollections, humbh'ng myself with penitential confessions 
to God, and promising him that I would make confessions 
and restitution to others, as far as possible, where I had 
injured them. I then covenanted to be wholly the Lord's, 
and to be faithful in all things. This solemn season of 
confession and consecration occupied ^ about four hours, 
during which I lay most of the time upon my face on the 
floor. This consecration had an immediate and powerful 
effect upon my life. I was filled with zeal, and labored 
earnestly for the welfare of souls. But I was not entirely 
at rest. I did not know the way of faith. 

My consecration was entire to the full extent of all the 
light I had. My recollection is perfectly clear upon this 
matter. I had given myself fully, and without reserve to 
the Lord. I was wonderfully helped by the Holy Spirit, 
who gave me a clear discernment, and enabled me to make 
very thorough work of it. I not only made a general and 
" comprehensive consecration of all to God, but I particular 
ized all that I could think of. I prayed for light to see if 
there Avere any thing more, until I felt clearly conscious 
that every thing was laid on the. altar. 

This was nearly four years before I received the bless- 
ing of entire sanctification. I did not then believe there 
was any such state. My soul panted after God, and I 


sought Him at times with. much, earnestness, but I had no 
spiritual state before my mind as a definite object of pur- 
suit. I labored much, and was permitted to see several 
revivals of religion. During this time, however, I was 
"brought gradually to understand that it "was the privilege 
of Christians to be sanctified wholly, and that their whole 
spirit and soul and body might be preserved blameless unto 
the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ. 

I now had a definite object before me. I was assured 
that this blessed state was to be obtained by faith. 1 tried 
to have faith for it. As an illustration of my efforts, I will 
describe one of my attempts. I was on the haymow in my 
barn alone, and I was thinking of sanctification. I thought 
I would kneel down and pray for it. I did so ; and cried 
very earnestly unto God for the blessing. I knew the dif- 
ficulty must be that I did not believe. I was conscious 
that my feelings were much drawn out, and it seemed to 
me, while I was praying, that if I could only feel some- 
what more, then perhaps my feelings would become faith. 
What a vain idea, and yet how common, that faith consists 
in feelings. I knew no better then, and I tried to feel as 
much as I could. At length, thinking possibly I might 
have succeeded, I paused and looked into myself ; but all 
was vague and uncertain. I needed further instruction. 
After a time God gave it to me. 

In company with some others, I went to Newark, to 
attend a convention on the subject of sanctification. On 
the way there, a sister, giving me an account of her expe- 
rience, said that, when she sought and obtained the bless- 
ing of sanctification, she consecrated herself to God, and 
believed that He received her, but that she did not receive 
the inward witness of the Spirit until seven days after- 
wards ; yet during all that time she held on to her confi- 
dence of God's faithfulness to His promise, and then, after 
about seven days, the Spirit came upon her and filled her 


with a joyful sense of His love. This was very helpful to 
me, fcr J had supposed the baptism- of the Holy Ghost was 
always given instantaneously, if the offering was accepted 
of God. The meeting continued through the day. At 
the noon intermission I was conversing with a young lady 
who professed to have enjoyed the blessing but a short 
time. I put this inquiry to her, " Suppose I should believe 
for the blessing, how should I know that I believed?" 
Very properly, she answered, "Faith is its own evidence." 
I saw then, as I have ever since seen more clearly, that 
faith was a matter of consciousness, and not of reasoning, 
just as memory or perception is. 

Among the experiences related that day, one by Rev. 
William Hill was especially interesting and instructive to 
me. Brother Hill was my intimate friend, and we had 
long studied and prayed over the subject together. He 
had received the blessing that morning in Dr. Palmer's 
house in New York. He related to me fully all the exer- 
cises through which he had passed the preceding twenty- 
four hours. He told of his child-like simplicity in seeldng, 
of the clear and faithful instructions given him, the full 
consecration, the long struggle to believe, which continued 
through the night, and the peaceful rest of soul which came 
in the morning. He scarcely needed to tell me the result. 
I read it in his subdued manner, his holy fervor, and in 
everything about him. I felt that he had outstripped me 
in the race, and I was glad of it, though I had started long 
before him. 

After the meeting Brother Hill and I retired to a 
private house, where we resumed the conversation. He 
instructed and encouraged me to come to God at once. 
Among other things, he said, " If you cannot give yourself 
up to God with as much feeling as you desire, do not be 
discouraged on that account, but do it with what feeling 
you can, and God will accept the offering." He also 


insisted much upon the duty of believing God's word of 
promise, irrespective of our own feelings. Pie seemed to 
have the most profound convictions concerning the sin of 
hesitating to believe God's word, and quoted with great 
force the passage, "He that believeth not God, hath made 
him a liar, because he believeth not the record that God 
gave of His Son. And this is the record, that God hath 
given to us, eternal life, and this life is in His Son." He 
said he had been so deeply convicted on this point during 
the past night that he had written down a solemn promise 
to God that henceforth he would, without hesitation and 
without having any regard to the state of his own feelings, 
believe any promise of God's word which applied to him. 

These admonitions were very useful to me. They gave 
me light where I needed it. I had been accustomed to 
look with more confidence to the state of my own feelings 
than to the declarations of God's word. Now I was con- 
vinced that I must "let God be true, and every mail a 
liar." God's word must be believed without questioning, 
and without comparing it with my own feelings, or bringing 
it to any other test. I saw that when, by grace, I fulfilled 
the required conditions of a promise, it would be great sin 
in me to hesitate a moment in believing that the promise 
tvas fulfilled. 

T was pointed to the promise, " Wherefore come out 
from among them, and be ye separate, saith the Lord, and 
touch not the unclean, thing, and I will receive you, and 
will be a Father unto you, and ye shah 1 be my sons and 
daughters, saith the Lord Almighty." It was now very 
clear to me that if I should, by a renewed consecration, 
come out and be separate unto God, and renounce the 
unclean thing, which is sin, that then it would be my duty 
immediately to believe that God received me. This would 
be no more than simply believing that God was as good as 
His word. I saw. this to be the way of faith, and it 


appeared eminently reasonable and just. I now saw the 
simple path, and I longed to enter immediately into the 
blessed state which I had so long sought. I said, " I am 
ready to give myself up and believe." 

"Stop a moment," said Brother Hill, "there is one 
thing more. When you give yourself up to God, and 
begin to believe that Pie receives you, you must hold on 
believing, and if you are tempted to doubt whether God 
receives you, you must not for a moment entertain tie 
doubt, but drive it away ; and this you can do by repeating 
over the promises of the Scripture and clinging to them." 

Such were substantially the teachings he gave me, 
though I may not have retained the precise form of 
expression. At any former period I should have regarded 
such instructions as leading directly to presumption and 
self-deception. But they were then, as they have been to 
me ever since, the light of true wisdom. In following 
them I was enabled to enter the way of holiness. 

"We bowed in prayer. With the simplicity of a child, 
I gave myself to the Lord, with all that pertained to me, 
for time and eternity, to be wholly His. All was laid on 
the altar, time, talents, reputation, prospects, influence, 
wife, children, possessions, everything. I renounced all 
sin, and gave myself wholly to God. Then I told the 
Lord that I believed He received me, and that I would 
continue to believe in view of His promise, even if He 
should not give me an inward witness for a week or a 
month. I would believe His word alone, without any 
regard to my feelings. I knew I was sincere, and I knew 
God's promise could not fail. On rising from my knees, I 
said to the two brethren with me, " I have done it ; the 
Lord is mine, and I am His." 

Immediately Satan suggested a most plausible tempta- 
tion. It was so subtle it seemed to be the spontaneous 
reasoning of my own mincl. I thought, " If I have done 


this -with my whole heart, then, no doubt, God has received 
me. But am I sure that I have done it with my whole 
heart ?" Had I entertained this question, I should have 
gone back into the wilderness. Thank God, I had been 
forewarned. Without giving the suggestion a moment's 
thought, I turned my mind toward the Scripture, and tried 
to drive it aAvay. I walked back and forth in the rooms, 
and repeated these promises, "There is, therefore, now no 
condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus, who 
walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit," and 
"Reckon ye also yourselves to be dead indeed, unto sin, 
but alive unto God through Jesus Christ our Lord." The 
effort was successful. God gave me the victory. The 
temptation to doubt and question was gone ; and I rested 
in the beginning of a life of faith wherein Christ was 
apprehended as a present and full Saviour. 

My sensibilities were not greatly moved at first. But 
after two or three days the Holy Comforter filled my heart 
with joy, and made me to realize a veiy sweet sense of 
hi ward purity and uprightness. I went about my work in 
my parish with a peculiar delight, and with a conscious 
strength of faith unknown before. With the utmost sim- 
plicity, I told everywhere what the Lord had done for me, 
beginning with my own family and my own people, and 
going abroad wherever the way was opened. Fruits were 
abundant. Many received the blessing of sanetification, 
and among the first was my wife, then many of my 
Church, and within a few months, in my parish, not far 
from a hundred were converted from the world. 

It would take volumes to relate my experiences since 
that time. For some time I walked in clear blessed light 
and perfect love. My sense of inward purity was very 
clear and sweet. My joy was often full, at times ecstatic ; 
my faith was firm, strong, and increasing. My labors were 
abundant, and my success marked. After about two years, 


having changed my place of residence, and being unsettled 
for a time, and among those who were not much interested 
in sanctification, I became languid, and suffered my 
attention to be diverted, and. spoke less on the subject; and 
thus the fine gold became dim, and the Spirit that had 
" wrought in me mightily" was in a measure quenched 
and grieved. On one occasion, I felt that I had lost the 
blessing, and in prayer I acknowledged it to God. Then 
the tempter was permitted to assail and overwhelm my 
soul. My faith had ceased to hold Jesus, and what was 
there to save me from the adversary I I was brought into 
great spiritual tribulation. For about twenty hours my 
soul was filled during much of the time with what seemed 
to be the horrors of despair. I went to two of God's dear 
children, who prayed for me, and while they were praying, 
I was delivered. 

From that time the fear of God was upon me as never 
before. For a year I had so deep and awful fear of God, 
that all worldly concerns seemed of little moment, and yet 
all along through it, I had the peace and joy of the Lord. 
After about a year, this solemn awe in a measure subsided, 
and had less influence on my sensibilities, yet I most 
devoutly thank the Lord that in a good degree it has 
remained as an abiding principle, and so to speak, a perma- 
nent safeguard. 

I have had many precious manifestations of grace to 
my soul, which have greatly quickened and strengthened 
me in the knowledge of God. At one time the Lord 
revealed himself to me by his dear name Emamiel, " God 
with us " For a long season after this, I had constantly a 
deep and precious faith in Jesus as being with me, and 
manifesting himself to me, and this realization increased 
and continued, greatly to my comfort and strength. 

My experience at that time was expressed in the follow- 
ing language : 


" I seems to me that I realize a special growth in grace 
every day. Oh, how near and how dear is Jesus to me ! 
How he opens "to me the beauties and graces and glories of 
his own character ! He quickens and energizes my soul. 
He is quick, often instant, to deliver me from sharp temp- 
tations, and brings me out with joy and triumph. He is 
my refuge. Oh, what a meaning in that word, refuge, as 
applied to him ! Yes, I have learned how the name of the 
Lord is a strong tower ; ' the righteous runneth into it and 
is safe.' As I go in and out, as I walk the. street, as I rise 
up and He down, I speak to him as a familiar Friend. My 
words, either spoken or in the silence of my heart, are 
simple, direct, confiding. His answers are loving, quick, 
and meeting the full demands of my faith, often exceed- 
ing abundantly above all that I ask or think." 

Several times the Holy Spirit has baptized me into the 
deeper and more intimate knowledge of himself, each time 
refining me, and purifying away more of the dross. Just 
at the close of the last year, while humbling myself before 
him in a spirit of contrition, he began to pour upon me a 
deeper baptism of the Holy Ghost than I had ever 
received before. It has continued with increase much of 
the time from day to day, and from week to week. I never 
realized so sweetly the " feDowship of the Spirit." I have 
a great sense of my own nothingness, and with it a most 
precious confidence that I can commit all to. the blessed 
Holy Ghost, and rely upon him for all needed grace. Self- 
denial was never so easy to me as it is now. Indeed, it is 
a pleasure. The Holy Spirit seems to make everything 
easy. I am saved from the past, and I am kept from 
prying into the future, and the present is full of peace, and 
often of joy. I do everything, seeking to pleas'e him, and 
everything I do is a pleasure. I am conscious of purity of 
heart and of his indwelling. To God be all the glory ! 



ALVATION is the same in all ages and in all 
hearts. Under the impulses of devotion, the 
Psalmist demands, " What shall I render tinto 
the Lord for all his benefits toward me?" 
Many Zion travelers, on reviewing the journey of past 
life, feel their gratitude (like that of David) welling up into 
songs and utterances of praise " to Him who died for 
them and arose again." * * * * 

Thus memory leads me back near forty-seven years, 
when first I felt the pulses of divine life thrill through my 
being, and "a live coal" from off the altar of God's grace 
touched my tongue to praise ; and I said, " God hath for- 
given all my iniquities." Then " the humble heard thereof, 
and were glad." Who expects the justified soul to live in 
the enjoyment of the blessing without professing it ? It is 
just as delusive for us to expect the sanctified to live in the 
continuous enjoyment of that richer blessing without pro- 
fessing it. If it was my duty, in youthful days, to tell 
what the Lord had done for my soul, surely it is both my 
privilege and duty, in age, to tell "in meekness and fear " 
the story of richer grace and increasing love. 

More than three years ago, the subject, of holiness be- 
came the absorbing thought of my mind. I read much 


upon the subject, and prayed in agonies of untold desire 
for the blessing of a clean heart. My convictions for 
inbred sin were deep and painful, and still increased the more 
I prayed. " The beauties of holiness " were all the time 
attracting me on to their attainment and enjoyment. I 
was conscious during the time that I was growing in grace, 
and different times I did in substance receive the blessing 
of a clean heart ; but I did not rest in it, and " commit. my 
way to the Lord." 

The 9th of July, 1866, the struggles of my poor soul 
subsided into an implicit resting in God for full salvation. 
On that memorable night. I had renewed my consecration- 
vows before God in all things and for all things pertaining 
to holiness. A sense of my need of divine aid took all 
self-dependence out of my soul. A strange tenderness and 
contrition filled me. Tears flowed more sweetly than ever 
before in my life. I seemed to be little, about the size of 
Samuel when he said, " Speak, Lord : thy servant hear- 
eth." And I was in a like state of expectancy; with 
Samuel, intensely looking for the blessing of a clean heart 
from the Lord. Suddenly faith seemed to grow massive 
and strong; and I said, "I will never give up my confidence 
in God." There was a power in that resolve more than 
mine : but all my soul was in it ; and my weakness con- 
sciously joined itself to the divine strength, and an aspira- 
tion went up equal to the attainment of the blessing. 
Coincidently, a current of heavenly love streamed through 
my whole being; like fire, it permeated soul and body. 
My rapture was unutterable. A weight of glory came on 
me, and I felt as if my physical powers would be entirely 
prostrated under it. I sank to the floor ; and the unearthly 
emotions gradually merged into "the peace of God that 
passeth all understanding," "keeping my heart and mind 
through Christ Jesus." "Thanks be to God for the 
unspeakable gift." 



Then a light rested upon the promises of God ; this 
one especially : " That ye may be strengthened with might 
by his Spirit in the inner man." " To know the love of 
Christ, which passeth knowledge.'' These also : " Commit 
thy way unto the Lord, and he shall bring it to pass." 
" Best in the Lord, and wait patiently for him." I looked 
anxiously toward results, as Moses did when imploringly 
he cried, "Oh, send me not up unless Thy presence go 
with me!" How tender the response that comes, "My 
presence shall go with thee, and give thee rest ! " Again 
God says, " On all my glory there shall be a defense." 
Enough : this is all that my soul needs. "With an unyield- 
ing grasp, my faith shall ever cling to these divine vouchers. 
"V/hat am I, and what is my father's house," that, 
although I have lingered threescore and two years, I should 
find such favor in the soul-cleansing blood of Christ ? 
"Lord, now lettest thou thy servant depart in peace, 
according to thy word ; for mine eyes have sen thy salva- 

Lord, spread tJiis salvation abroad 

Till all shall acknowledge thy sway. 
And join tliy salvation to laud, 

The Life and the Trutli and the Way ; 
Till nations and isles of the sea 

Shall hail the millennium of peace : 
From erring idolatry free, 

Then discord and envy shall cease. 

The wolf shall repose with the lamb, 

The kid by the leopard recline, 
Appeased through Emanuel's name, 

United in friendship divine : 
One song shall be carolied all round 

This earth, robed in vestals of peace ; 
'To Christ all the glory redound, 

While man shares the Eden of bliss. 





OR more than five years I have been studying 
the question of entire sanctification. I have 
read upon the subject much. I have conversed 
freely with many who profess it. I have 
thought of it by day and by night. ; and I have desired 
to be wholly^ sanctified to God, soul, body, and spirit. 
At times I have been sceptical with regard to it ; then, 
when I have taken the New Testament and examined 
into it, my scepticism has given way at once. Jesus 
taught with no ambiguous words perfection, holiness. 

I have looked around me in the church to see if there 
were any whose " fruits " of that New Testament work 
were visible ; for I did not forget that our dear Saviour 
said, " by their fruits ye shall know them." I have seen 
many whose professions would not admit of a doubt. I 
have also seen some who, I thought, did not present the 
requisite "fruits." I remember, too, that these latter were 
not the standard by which to judge of the doctrine of 
Christain perfection. I must set my watch by the clock 
that I know keeps the true time, and not by those I know 
are always out of time. 

The writings of Madame Guy on and Fenelon, and of 
Dr. Upliam, and of Mrs. Palmer and others, presented a 

BEV. J. H. McCAETT. 133 

convincing argument, not only in a logical point of view, 
but what I hold to be better than logic, or which I might 
possibly style the higher logic ; namely, Christian experi- 
ence. All this rich experience cannot be denied ; it 
challenges the belief of all; it is absolutely incontrovertible. 
On the 1st of January, 1865, I solemnly resolved to 
renew my covenant with God. I said in my heart, " If 
there is anything I do not possess, I will have it by the 
grace of God." My language was continually, 

" Take my poor heart, and let it be 
Forever closed to all but tliee ; 
Seal tliou my breast, and let me wear 
That pledge of love forever there." 

On watch-night I tried to preach from Psalms cxvi. 12 : 
" What shall I render unto the Lord ? " etc. . God gave 
me considerable liberty, and the meeting was a sweet one 
to me. It was blessed to many others. But all the time 
something said to me, " Seek for more power." A voice 
would seem to say within me, " Is not spirituality the law 
of the church, as much as gravitation is of the material 
universe?" There was a divine impulse in my heart to 
seek something higher, deeper, purer. 

I would reason with myself thus: I have been con 
verted, have had the witness in my heart of acceptance 
with God. I am firm in my belief of and adherence to the 
doctrines of Christ, my Saviour. Is this not all I have 
any right to claim ? Is this not infinitely more than I 
deserve? How can I presume to ask of God for any- 
thing more? I felt a sense of extreme unworthiness. 
Then there came to mind this and kindred passages : Rom. 
viii. 32, " He that spared not his own Son, but delivered 
him up for us all, how shall he not with him freely give us 
all things?" " With Mm!" Yes, through Christ all 
things shall be mine. I will, I do, claim them in 


his name. Then, again, I often thought of that pas- 
sage ha John : " The Son of God was manifested, that 
he might destroy the works of the devil." (iii. 8.) And 
here I stood on the edge of the pool, the angel troubling 
the waters, and I not stepping in with boldness. I 
believed, yet did not believe; I saw, but not with the 
clearness I desired ; I loved God, and felt that I wanted to 
love him more. And from day to day I said to myself, 
"I will know all the fullness. I will dwell in the bosom of 
Love. I will not rest until I can drink in its power." 

" I can but perish if I go ; 

I am resolved to try ; 
For if I stay away, I know, 
I may forever die." 

I will " go on " from the " first principles of the doctrines 
of Christ " justification, baptism " unto perfection ; " if 
I do not, I may even lose what I have. " To him that 
hath shall be given, and from him that hath not shall be 
taken away even that which he hath." 

For some time I felt a strange desire to go to New 
York. I had some business there, but none that could not 
have been transacted by letter. I frequently said to my 
wife that I had an impression on my mind that I ought to 
go to New York. Just then an item of business came up, 
in connection with the church, that required me to go 
there. I intended, when I went, to visit the Tuesday after- 
noon meeting, on the subject of holiness, thinking I might 
'there receive the light I so much desired. I was one day 
too late for the meeting. After transacting my business, 
however, I called on Friday afternoon upon Dr. and "Mis. 
Palmer. In the course of my visit I told them my feelings, 
my desires. We seemed to become one ; that expresses it. 
I felt God was in the room. 

Dr. Palmer said, " Why not receive the blessing now ? '' 

REV. J. n. MCCARTY. 125 

"Yes," I said, "if there is anything for me I want it. 
I desire it above all things." 

There was much conversation upon the subject. 

Mrs. Palmer said, "Do you not believe it to be God's 
will even your sanctification ? " 

I said, " Yes I do ; to doubt it would be wicked." 
" Then why not have faith in the promise now, ' the 
altar sanctifies the gift "? " 

" Yes," I said, "I know it, and I have laid all on that 
altar, and will be the Lord's now and forever." 

" Now, said Mrs. Palmer, " that you have laid all on 
the altar, why not say, c / am the Lord's now and forever, 
wholly Ms, dead to the world, and alive to God, 
through our Lord Jesus Christ ? " 

I said it ; I was moved by a divine impulse that seemed 
almost irresistible : " / am the Lord's, soul, body, mind, now 
and forever" 

The feeling of my heart at that moment was like the 
flow of a mighty river. It was not rapturous, not exulting 
in its nature ; it was profound. I felt lifted above the 
earth. The world seemed to recede from me, as when one 
looks through a telescope reversed, while heaven seemed to 
come nearer than ever before. My dear reader, I rested 
that moment in the bosom of love. "We prayed together ; 
we sung a hymn of praise to God. I felt, as I never felt 
before, / am the Lord's. And after my most delightful 
interview with these servants of God, I started for Brook- 
lyn, to spend the Sabbath with the dear disciples of Fleet 
Street Church, on exchange with Brother Hatfield. As I 
walked through Bowery, I felt stronger in the Lord than I 
ever felt before. And oh, how often I said, " I am the 
Lord's, now and forever His " / Day and night I say it and 
feel it. 

I cannot close.this paper without saying a word to my 
brethren in the ministry. Dear brethren, God has called 


us to save men from sin and death. "We need all the gifts 
of the Spirit to fully qualify us for our work. Are we not 
guilty if we go into the battle without being fully armed ? 
Kemember, brethren, that the Holy Spirit is the only source 
of true ministerial power. Let us have all we can get of 
this. Let us preach Jesus constantly, relying on him for 
support and comfort. May God give us a Pentecost all 
over the land ! Let us not spend our time in controversy 
about mere terms, words. Let us consecrate ourselves to 
God, wholly, and receive the baptism of power. Let us 
remember the words of Jesus to Nicodemus : " The wind 
bloweth where it listeth, and thou hearest the sound 
thereof, but canst not tell Avhence it cometh and whither it 
goeth: so is every one that is born of the Spirit." Seek 
the gift of power, and let the Spirit write its own expla- 
nations on the heart, and we shall say with the blind man 
in the Scriptures (John ix. 25.), " One thing I know, that, 
whereas I was blind, I now see." To God be all the glory 
through Jesus Christ, his Son. Amen ! 




WAS converted to God in the days of my youth, 
in the city of Philadelphia, under the labors of 
that eminent servant of Christ, Rev. Dr. Pit- 
man. But from my earliest recollection, my 
mind was piously inclined, and deeply impressed by divine 
things. This was attributable mainly to the fact that I 
was favored with pious parents ; my beloved mother 
especially, being an eminently holy Christian, The savor 
of her deep devotion, and intimate communion with God, 
ever followed me. In my trans- Atlantic home, in the days 
of my early childhood, I well remember her closet hours, 
and pleadings in behalf of her children. She used to take 
me with her, under the shadow of the Mercy-seat, and 
pour out over my head her strong ciies and tears ia my 
behalf. The memory thereof is sweet and ineffaceable. 
Called, in the providence of God, to seek a home on the 
American shore, the power of that mother's holy example 
and ardent prayers rested upon me. And, although for a 
time, in this strange, far-oif land, led into scenes of frivolity 
and sin, I was at length brought to the feet of Jesus. My 
experience of justifying grace was clear. I leaped over 
the altar, and clasped the honored instrument of my con- 
version around the neck, bedewing him with my tears, and 


blessing him. Subsequently, however, I wandered from 
"the central point of bliss," but was happily restored. 
Shortly after this, Providence directed my steps to New 
York, and I became a member of the Allen Street church, 
and there received my license to exhort. At that time I 
was brought into communion with some of the most devoted 
servants of Christ. The Saturday evening experience 
meetings were to me seasons of profit and delight. While 
attending them, my convictions on the subject of holiness 
were very deep. And then, the memories of a mother's 
purity and devotion were lingering about my pathway. I 
made some effort to seek entire sanctification, but without 
receiving satisfactory evidence. Thence, I was called to 
enter the ministry, and became a member of the New 
Jersey Conference. For twenty years I endeavored, 
according to my humble ability, to prosecute the work. 
My labors were blessed far above my deservings. I was 
permitted, in iny charges, to see many souls brought from 
darkness to light. During that period my own experience 
was variable, sometimes in clear light, and then again not 
so clear. At times my convictions on the subject of holi- 
ness were very powerful. I saw my duty, yet did it not. 
Theoretically, I was orthodox, never having any fellowship 
with " modern divinity." I always believed entire sancti- 
fication to be an attainment as definite as justification, 
separate and distinct therefrom, attainable in this life ; 
attainable by simple faith, and accompanied by as distinct 
a witness of the Spirit. This doctrine I preached in my 
charges, as well as I could without having a personal 
experience of it ; invariably receiving tokens of special divine 
favor, when so discoursing. But, in preaching it, pungent 
conviction seized my own soul, again and again. A voice, 
loud as thunder, would ask : "AVhy do you not seek it ? " 
Some circumstances led me, unhappily, to entertain pre- 
judices against those who were specially engaged in pre- 

REV. G. HUGHES. 129 

senting the subject of holiness definitely to the churches. I 
thought they made the matter too prominent ; were too 
persistent, and, to use a common expression, " made it a 
holly." Satan took advantage of me at that point, and 
held me back from full liberty. The memory of those 
years of prejudice is now very painful. Would that I 
could obliterate the record ! My prejudices were not 
against the doctrine itself, for I was thoroughly Wesleyan, 
but against the modes of operation adopted by those who 
made it a specialty. And, although at one time stationed 
so as easily to have enjoyed the privilege (priceless as' I 
now feel) of attending the meetings at Dr. Palmer's, pre- 
judice kept me away. At camp-meetings and other 
places, I avoided the society of those who were specially 
devoted to the work of holiness. So foolish, so infatuated 
was I on this subject. What years of enjoyment, and of 
ministerial power, have I lost on this account f God of 
mercy, for Jesus' sake, forgive my blindness and folly ! 

But " my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are 
your ways my ways, saith the Lord." How unsearchable 
are His judgments, and Plis ways are past finding out. 
Failing health compelled me to desist from the active 
work of the ministry. Physicians advised me to cross the 
Atlantic. Providence kindly opened the way, and I gladly 
embraced the opportunity to mingle with friends from whom 
I had been long separated. In being thus laid aside from 
public service I was deeply afflicted. The hand of the 
Lord was heavy upon me. I could not understand why, 
in the prime of life, this dispensation should be upon me. 
For a time, my whole efforts were directed to the recovery 
of health. God, however, showed me that he had other 
designs concerning me, even to bring me nearer to Him- 
self, -to the realization of full Gospel liberty. By a train 
of circumstances, most wonderful in their character, I was 
brought to decide to be wholly the Lord's, not without a 


blessing Lira. Subsequently, however, I wandered from 
"the central point of bliss," but was happily restored. 
Shortly after this, Providence directed my steps to New 
York, and I became a member of the Allen Street church, 
and there received my li cense to exhort. At that time I 
was brought into communion with some of the most devoted 
servants of Christ. The Saturday evening experience 
meetings were to me seasons of profit and delight. "While 
attending them, my convictions on the subject of holiness 
were very deep. And then, the memories of a mother's 
purity and devotion were lingering about my pathway. I 
made some effort to seek entire sanctification, but without 
receiving satisfactory evidence. Thence, I was called to 
enter the ministry, and became a member of the New 
Jersey Conference. For twenty years I endeavored, 
according to my humble ability, to prosecute the work. 
My labors were blessed far above my deservings. I was 
permitted, in iny charges, to see many souls brought from, 
darkness to light. During that period my own experience 
was variable, sometimes in clear flight, and then again not 
so clear. At times my convictions on the subject of holi- 
ness were very powerful. I saw my duty, yet did it not. 
Theoretically, I was orthodox, never having any fellowship 
with " modern divinity." I always believed entire sancti- 
Jication to be an attainment as definite as justification, 
separate and distinct therefrom, attainable in this life; 
attainable by simple faith, and accompanied by as distinct 
a witness of the Spirit. This doctrine I preached in my 
charges, as well as I could without having a personal 
experience of it ; invariably receiving tokens of special divine 
favor, when so discoursing. But, in preaching it, pungent 
conviction seized my own soul, again and again. A voice, 
loud as thunder, would ask : " Why do you not seek it ? " 
Some circumstances led me, unhappily, to entertain pre- 
judices against those who were specially engaged in pre- 

REV. G. HUGHES. 129 

senthig the subject of holiness definitely to the churches. I 
thought they made the matter too prominent ; were too 
persistent, and, to use a common expression, " made it a 
hobby" Satan took advantage of me at that point, and 
held me back from full liberty. The memory of those 
years of prejudice is now very painful. Would that I 
could obliterate the record ! My prejudices were not 
against the doctrine itself, for I was thoroughly Wesleyan, 
but against the modes of operation adopted by those who 
made it a specialty. And, although at one time stationed 
so as easily to have enjoyed the privilege (priceless as* I 
now feel) of attending the meetings at Dr. Palmer's, pre- 
judice kept me away. At camp-meetings and other 
places, I avoided the society of those who were specially 
devoted to the work of holiness. So foolish, so infatuated 
was I on this subject. What years of enjoyment, and of 
ministerial power, have I lost on this account ? God of 
mercy, for Jesus' sake, forgive my blindness and folly ! 

But " my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are 
your ways my ways, saith the Lord." How unsearchable 
are His judgments, and His ways are past finding out. 
Failing health compelled me to desist from the active 
work of the ministry. Physicians advised me to cross the 
Atlantic. Providence kindly opened the way, and I gladly 
embraced the opportunity to mingle with friends from whom 
I had been long separated. In being thus laid aside from 
public service I was deeply afflicted. The hand of the 
Lord was heavy upon me. I could not understand why, 
in the prime of life, this dispensation should be upon me. 
For a time, my whole efforts were directed to the recovery 
of health. God, however, showed me that he had other 
designs concerning me, even to bring me nearer to Him- 
self, to the realization of full Gospel liberty. By a train 
of circumstances, most wonderful in their character, I was 
brought to decide to be wholly the Lord's, not without a 


struggle, however (even involving a willingness to sacrifice 
ministerial reputation if necessary). Dr. and Sirs. Palmer 
were holding meetings in my native city, Manchester. 1 
had not met them for years. They were led, providentially, 
I believed, to manifest a lively interest in my welfare. I 
resolved to go to the services, and open my mind to the 
reception of whatever light and influence the blessed Spirit 
might afford. The influence which rested upon my soul, 
in yielding myself unreservedly to the sway of truth, was 
delightful. It seemed as though from that hour I had 
entered upon a new world. It was no delusion no mom- 
entary excitement but the Divine hand, leading me 
gently, sweetly, step by step, into the Canaan of perfect love. 
I enjoyed the meetings greatly. Daily, my convictions 
waxed stronger and stronger ; until the resolve was made 
not to stop short of the great gospel boon. The vow was 
solemnly made, at the grave-side of my dear, sainted 
mother ; an hour never to be forgotten. 

As our friends had to close their labors hi Manchester, 
in order to enter another open door at Nottingham, I 
resolved to go thither, and wait upon G-od there, and see 
if He would not make it my Jerusalem. I said to my dear 
companion, The adversary has held me in captivity for 
years on this subject ; I now see it and feel it. I am 
determined to have the victory. Let us go to Nottingham. 
We went ; seeking quiet lodgings, resolved fully to wait 
upon God. We had hardly arrived at our lodgings, on 
Saturday evening, in the house of an humble local preacher, 
himself enjoying, as I found, " the gift of power," ere a 
remarkable spirit of quiet, heavenly satisfaction pervaded 
my mind. I was quite on the verge of heaven. No 
Saturday evening in my remembrance was ever invested 
with such living, divine, unutterable interest. Dr. and 
Mrs. P. were to open their commission on Sabbath after- 
noon. I went in the morning to the Wesleyan chapel, and 

EEV. G. HUGHES. 131 

leard a sermon peculiarly appropriate to me, under tha 
circumstances. My heart was melted. A voice whispered : 
" If the Lord shall baptize you, will you be a witness for 
him to-day, to the people of Nottingham ?" Promptly and 
joyously, I returned an affirmative response. Instantly, 
the answering fire descended, and my soul was filled with 
love and joy. In the afternoon, I went to the meeting 
under the direction of Dr. and Mrs. P. During the whole 
service, I was sweetly exercised. I seemed to breathe a 
heavenly atmosphere no unusual excitement, but a calm 
and heavenly frame, almost within speaking distance of 
countless angels and redeemed spirits, and overshadowed 
with the glorious presence of the Holy Trinity. At the 
close of the service, a most solemn hour, while the people 
were prostrate before God, I lay there at the foot of the 
cross, and gave myself up, in living consecration, body, soul 
and spirit, to " The Crucified," and received the witness 
of acceptance. They were singing, " Glory, glory to the 
Lamb ! " and my freed soul replied, with an emphasis 
never before realized, " Glory, glory, glory to the 
Lamb ! " My experience was not rapturous, but unutter- 
ably peaceful, a glorious rest in Jesus ! I was constrained, 
in the evening, to ask Dr. P. to let me witness for my 
master, and God blessed me in fulfilling my morning vow. 
Let me ask the blood-washed sons and daughters of Zion 
to magnify the Lord with me ! 



Y whole being exclaims, " Come and hear, all ye- 
that fear God, and I will declare what he 
hath done for my soul." 

I had longed for a deeper knowledge of per- 
sonal holiness. I had often read, and often preached, upon 
the necessity of holiness, and had even made statements, 
in my sermons, on the manner of its attainment, that very 
closely agree with statements I would now make. But the 
thought of taking my Lord Jesus as a present Saviour 
from sin was not as now received. I took him for my 
Saviour, and supposed that I must wait until death for disin- 
thralment from a bondage which for years had compelled 
me to cry out, " O, wretched man that I am ! " 

From that bondage I have been some months free. The 
tract called " The Living Christ " was placed before me 
in September last. With a dear brother, I read it. During 
the reading of it, with full hearts, we both knelt together, 
and made a renewed consecration to God. On my part, 
and I believe on his, this was entirely unreserved. I was 
at that time in the use of tobacco, the grand argument for 
which was the condition of my throat. A few days 
sufficed ; for, however strong the health-view of tobacco 
might be, I was persuaded, after all, that it was only an 


idol. I accordingly renounced it } and have proved the 
vanity of its use as a remedy in my own case. My throat 
was glad of the farewell, and praised God more clearly 
than ever. The weed was a hateful thing, that defiled my 

On Tuesday, September 26th, 1865, I attended the 
Tuesday meeting, and there made public my consecration 
to Christ in every particular ; an act for which I have been 
glad and thankful to my God ever since. I then took 
Jesus indeed to be the living Christ within me, to do a work 
in my soul which I had long tried to do myself. He veiy 
soon had the established traders out of His temple. Sins 
and besetments that had tried and troubled me for years 
were gone, and my faith beheld him conqueror in me and 
for me. Oh, how near was the Lord Jesus to my soul, 
cleansed by his precious blood and Spirit ! I could not 
describe the joy, the peculiar peace, the full satisfaction, 
flowing from the presence of Jesus with me. I could say, 
" Lord, now I know that there is positively not one thing 
withheld from thee. Take me where thou wilt ; make me 
what thou wilt ; do with me as thou wilt,-r only give me 
thyself continually." 

Since that time, I have enjoyed great liberty, and have 
found the liberty of sanctification by faith to be vastly 
different from my previous views of its nature. The word 
of God has been more intensely precious than ever. I have 
feasted on it, and grown greatly in the knowledge of it. 

It may be asked, whether I had not, years before, made 
a consecration of myself to God. The answer is, that I 
did, in general : but in particular, in full ; to have no pref- 
erence of my own before God, and no desire but His will ; 
to boast in the cross, being crucified to the world, as I now 
understand it, I never made such a consecration before. 

One of the most noticeable features of the blessing thus 
received is deliverance from a certain bondage in regard to 


position. What other brethren thought and would say 
concerning any act or acts, has often been a question -with 
me; and I was early warned that the rumor of my 
profession of the blessing of sanctifi cation by faith, or 
entire sanctification, would injure my ministerial reputation. 
The answer is, If God has given me an especial blessing, 
which can be defined by its power in my heart and life ; if 
it releases me into a wonderful liberty from sins and beset- 
ments of years, I am certainly called upon to give to 
every one that asketh me the reason of the hope that is in 

Further, if the experience of grace received agree with 
the experience of any others than those of my own com- 
munion, I am not to deny it, nor any name by which it is 
called, if that name be agreeable to the words of the Holy 
Spirit. Nor will I. 

Sweeter than all the joys of earth is communion with 
all who have like precious faith. Let it, then, be published, 
that I do take into my soul the living Christ to be my 
sanctifying and satisfying portion. This life is indeed a 
living, moment by moment, on the Son of God ; and the 
moments spent in the conscious presence of such a .Lord 
make heaven upon earth. 

" My all to Christ I've given, 

My talents, time, and voice, 
Myself, my reputation : 

Tlie lone way is my choice. 

Oli ! Jesus, precious Jesns, 

My all-sufficient Friend, 
Come fold me to tliy bosom, 

E'en to the journey's end. 

Tlie cross for Christ I'll cherish. 

It's crucifixion bear. 
All hail reproach or sorrow, 

If Jesus leads me there ! " 


After more than two years have passed, it is ray 
privilege to testify that Jesns "saves His people from 
their sins." I am of opinion that Pie does this for all His 
dear people according to their faith. They are called a 
" peculiar people." I find many who consider my princi 
pies peculiar. But they have been obtained at a very 
peculiar place. At the fountain opened for sin and for 
uncleanuess, E found a wonderful change wrought. The 
difference between my present and former life, in this 
respect, is that I now believe what the scriptures say of 
this fountain in full, and instead of visiting the precious 
place occasionally with burdens, I now stay there, and with 
great delight feel that Jesus continually does a work in the 
soul which all the efforts of eveiy man must signally fail to 
do. Jesus can do in a moment what long years of man's 
severest discipline only seems to make impossible. " And 
this is the victory that overcometh the world even our 

It is, therefore, my firm belief, drawn from the Word of 
God and a very precious experience, that the Christian 
has but " one thing " to do, which excludes from his life 
everything repugnant to the gracious habit. That one 
thing is, " LOOKING UNTO JESUS." It most effectually kills 
looking to self, or looking at self, it kills every bad habit, 
for it puts the light of eternity upon it, and brings Himself 
near, before whom the contrite soul realizes that sin has 
no place, nor has anything a place which could be offensive 
to Him. I find also that as the soul looks unto Jesus it 
gets a strong desire, tendency, and habit, of distance from 
the world. "Worldly company, and gains, and honors, of 
every grade, fade into their naked nothingness. And so, 
the soul is full of rest. It needs no thought for the 
morrow, when Jesus is its full and everlasting portion. The 
believer enters into rest, in Jesus Christ. In Him, " The 
Lord is my habitation whereunto I continually resort." 


He is my Peace, my abiding Shepherd, before whom I can 
never want, and His "perfect love casteth out fear." My 
soul exults with "joy unspeakable and full of glory," that 
my love is from His love, that the "love of God shed 
abroad in my heart by the Holy Ghost, which is given 
unto me " with other saints, is the reason, cause, and life 
of my love to Him and all His. He, blessed and 
precious Jesus, is a welcome guest to my delighted soul, 
and a mighty quickener of all my powers into constant, 
and jealous activity in His service. 

I do totally disclaim any merit of my own. His merit 
is ah 1 my plea, and must stand for all the infirmities of my 
natural constitution. I further do disclaim and denounce 
any power to save myself from a single sin. But I do 
declare it as my full belief that Jesus Christ is my triumph- 
ant King to subdue within me everything which could 
oppose His holiness. And I declare that this is my belief 
concerning Jesus as "made of God unto me sanctification ; " 
a personal, efficacious cleansing of the soul, whereby alone 
it is made a temple of the Holy Ghost. How can man 
make clean the temple of the Holy Ghost? Therefore 
doth my soul, with fervor, commit my cleansing unto Him- 
self. "Now unto Him that is able to do exceeding 
abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to 
the power that worketh in us. Unto Him be glory in the 
church by Christ Jesus, throughout all ages, world without 
end. Amen." 

REV. B. F. CBAKY, D. D. 


Y conversion was a wonderful change, affecting 
my whole nature, and new-creating my heart. 
I awoke in a new world, filled with new- 
ideas, hopes, fears, and ambitions. The work 
was instantaneous, overwhelming, convincing; giving me 
peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ. This 
first joy remained with me for about a year without any 
interruption, except when I thought of the future and of 
in 7 profession; and then I always thought I should be 
obliged to preach. "Various hindrances to my plans about 
this time perplexed me some ; but Christ was so precious, 
study so sweet, my heart so free of distrust, that I greatly 
rejoiced. My first great trial was the fear of losing my 
hope in Christ, and becoming an outcast. One or two 
backslidden Christians presented to me the horrible 
example of falling from grace, and created an alarm, and 
Mud of distrust of my piety, which greatly distressed me. 
Then came a season of temptation beyond any thing I had 
before met. My hopes of this life seemed blighted ; and I 
passed through four or five years of indecision and unhap- 
piness. I was not always unblessed and unhappy. I had 
times of refreshing, when my soul would rejoice with joy 
unspeakable and full of glory ; and then I would relapse 


into unbelief, coldness, and exceeding unrest, bordering 
upon despair. 

All this time I studied hard, and tried to convince 
myself that God would permit me to enter my chosen pro- 
fession, and enjoy life. I pictured to myself eminent 
Christian lawyers, and hoped to be one myself some day. 
The struggle continued for weary months, until I finally 
and fully made up my mind to obey God, cost what it 

T studied my profession, and exhorted the people to 
repent. The license to exhort was followed by a license 
to preach as a local preacher, and that by a recommenda- 
tion to the Annual Conference. This was not presented 
to the Conference, on account of the great number of 
applications ; and I hoped it would be the last of it. I 
applied nryself more closely than ever, and began the 
practice of the law. In the fall of 1845, being required 
by my presiding elder to. talk at a camp-meeting, I took 
for my subject the words, " Keep thy heart with all dili- 
gence i for out of it are the issues of life." 

The sermon, or whatever it was, I do not remember, 
nor the effect of it, except the overwhelming conviction 
that I had not kept my own heart, and was in danger of 
death. I determined then to preach all the tune ; to give 
up forever my profession, and everything else if need be, 
even to life. I said, " I will again ask admission to the 
Conference, and my acceptance or rejection will be the 
test. On this I will stand. God help me !" I was again 
recommended, and received under such peculiar circum- 
stances as to leave no doubt of the interposition of Provi- 
dence. I felt it then, and believe it still, and will never 
cease to labor as a Methodist preacher until I die, God 
being my helper. 

My religious experience then assumed another phase : 
it was that of extreme sensitiveness in reference to doing 

EEV. B. F. CEAEY, D.D. 139 

all that was required by the Church, and an earnest 
yearning for power to do the whole will of God. 

The first year of my ministry was one of incessant 
labor and study, and of much trouble and little fruit. The 
next year, I had a better time generally. The third year, 
I succeeded better, and had a deeper distress on account 
of my want of power with God and men. 

I read the life of John Fletcher, and was so humiliated 
by the contrast of his life with my own, that I stumbled, 
and nearly fell. I sometimes wished myself dead, unless I 
could gain the victory and have power, power to walk 
with God, power to rejoice always, power to preach with- 
out making sad failures. I prayed and read as I rode 
along through the woods, and often wept as T Avent to my 

In 1849 I was conducting a revival meeting where God 
displayed His power and mercy in a wonderful manner. 
I was on the full tide of joyous success ; I was freely justi- 
fied; and, if ever I rode on the sky spiritually, it was 
then. I occasionally feared that I would relapse into 
doubt, and lose my hold of this haven of bliss. I had 
often been happy before, and I remembered how I had 
gone from summer to winter in one dreary hour. I fully 
believed in holiness of heart and life, but knew I had 
neither. I had not the slightest doubt of the doctrine of 
perfect love ; but I did not exactly believe it was for me. 
I had freely conversed with one aged sister, who professed 
to enjoy the blessing of perfect love. She had given me 
her views ; but I had not even sought the blessing. I had 
told her my struggles and fears. I dreaded the evil day 
when I should lose my hold on God. I expected the con- 
test to last to the end of life. 

One day, while pleading with sinners at the altar to 
believe in Jesus, believe at once that he was able to save, 
witting to save, ready now to save, and then to believe that 


" He doth now save" this good sister, who was kneeling 
near me, said, 

"Brother Craiy, suppose you try that faith, yourself." 
My inconsistency at once arrested me. I saw all ; knew 
all. The gates of life were open: Jesus was ready to 
welcome me. Immediately I said, "Certainly: I do 
believe. I am Christ's ; all Christ's. I have the power" 

I do not know that I was any happier than often 
hefore; hut I had a secret sense of invincibility and 
triumph, that exalted me at once above the humiliating 
weaknesses that had beset me. 

For six years, from that hour, I could say, "God is 
with me : my sky is clear." Difficulties only nerved me : 
contest was nothing. I rejoiced in conscious strength, and 
knew I would have victoiy through Christ. I had no sea- 
sons of darkness sufficient to drive me from my stronghold. 
I did not feel the want of trust in my gracious Eedeemer. 

I tried to do the will of God ; and, as far as I knew, 
did it. I hesitated at no cross, murmured at no trial, 
cared but little for obstacles, insults, or opposition. I 
delighted to do the will of God ; and the harder the task, 
the more joy I took in performing it. I did not spare 
myself, but went through every labor with a joyous con- 
sciousness of power. 

My security was in Christ. I trusted him. I hoped 
never to fall again for want of faith. I often prayed, 
" Thy will be done," and would have gone through flood 
or fire to do the will of God. 

The question of suffering, patient, silent, long-continued, 
terrible suffering, had never come before me. I had not 
armed myself against it. I had health, friends, everything. 

The way to suffer I had to learn, and I have learned 
it. One joy after another departed, one scene of gloom 
after another came, until I stood amid the wreck, broken. 
God pity and forgive me ! T faltered beneath the weight ; 

REV. B. F. GEARY, D. D. 141 

I did not stand; I ceased to confess Christ as a full 
Saviour. I deeply regretted the loss of spiritual power, 
and the hours of deepondency which darkened my soul. 
That I might have done better, that I ought to have 
endured the trial by fire, I have no doubt. If I had con- 
fessed Christ more fully, had clung to Him more tena- 
ciously, I would have done better ; but, after all, can we 
learn except by experience ? 

I once thought I was armed ; so do many think of 
themselves: but one cannot conceive of desolation, nor 
provide against it. I do not mean that God cannot keep 
us. He can ; but He does not give us strength before the 
trial, but only in it. Let any father or mother who now 
reads this try to conceive what would be the state of feel- 
ing, if a darling child should this moment be burned to 
death. One may pray for strength ; but this might crush 
him. So this and other sorrows oppressed my heart ; and 
the wound is still there, and the shuddering horror of the 
hour comes back once in a while to deepen my disgust of 
merely human hopes. I stumbled along through these 
months of fiery trial. Hell seemed only a step from me. I 
feared the awful temptations of Satan. The end is this : 
The state of melancholy and distrust has passed, and a 
subdued, settled feeling of rest in Jesus Christ has come, 
and with it a land of longing which seems to overcome the 
fear and dread of death. As to loving God with all my 
heart, I deem it a privilege and a pleasure to say I do. 
Always hesitating and timid about professing any thing, I 
do now feel I am compelled to confess this for Jesus' sake. 
I yet desire to express my fullest concurrence in the doc- 
trine of Christian perfection, and my humble trust that all 
I have is Christ's. Of late, I have uncommonly sweet 
communings with those who love God, and a peace which 
flows like a river, and can say, in faith, that I am willing 
now to do or to suffer the will of God, 



WAS born in Thompson, Windham County, 
Conn., March 1st, 1790, and was early taught 
by pious parents to fear God, and live for 
eternity, but knew not that I " -must be born 
again," until November 24th, 1807. Then, under the 
labors of that dear man of God, Rev. E. R. Sabin, now in 
heaven, I saw and felt my need of a Saviour. On the 
ninth day of December following I was justified by faith 
in Christ ; the Spirit witnessing the fact to my spirit. As 
I tried to live to the gloiy of God, I soon felt the need of 
a deeper work of grace in my heart ; for at times the 
remains of the carnal mind, and roots of bitterness, were 
springing up and troubling me, distracting my mind, and 
interrupting my communion with God. 

I was convinced by reading the Scriptures, and the 
testimony of eminent Christians, that I must and might be 
" holy ;" " perfected in love ;" " dwell in Christ, and He in 
me." This soon became the burden of my prayer, -to be 
" cleansed from all sin, and filled with all the fullness of 
God." At times it appeared nigh, and that I was then to 
be "baptized with the Holy Ghost and with fire." I 
seemed to have strong hold, by faith, of the promised 
blessing; but hesitating to yield my whole heart there and 


then, fearing I should not keep it, and adorn the holy 
doctrine of God my Saviour as might be expected of me, 
I found to my sorrow that I was far down the hill, as it 
were, that I -had labored hard to ascend ; and lost my 
strong hold of faith and prayer, and could only grope my 
way along as I had in the past, gaining and losing. 

About the first of September, 1808, there was a prayer- 
meeting at my father's ; and I saw by faith the long-sought- 
for blessing at hand, as I had often seen in secret devotion 
to God, and that now is my time to be purified from sin, 
and empowered to glorify God with " my soul and body, 
which are His." I agonized in prayer for it, and by grace 
resolved no more to parley, but then and there to obtain 
the blessing, the Lord being my helper ; and, if I did not 
gain the victory in the meeting, I wotdd go to the woods 
and pray all night, or until* I found it. As soon as this 
was the full determination of my heart, the Lord appeared 
lor my relief, and " glory shone around : " my soul was let 
into the " clear light, life, and fullness of Christ, my Lord." 
Under this powerful manifestation, my body was prostrated 
to the floor, and I cried aloud, in tears, for joy, wonder, 
love, and praise to God. This was "-above all that I could 
ask or think." I could now say, when tempted, to fear or 
shame, " Get thee behind me Satan ! " and the Enemy was 
vanquished at once. Here I found power through Christ 
to keep myself, and the Wicked One touched me not. This 
is the "holy ground," where we may see "the bush burn 
with fire, and not consumed." "Bless the Lord, O my 
soul ! " It is now nearly sixty years since I have known 
and "witnessed Christ's power "to save to the uttermost 
them that come unto God by Him." Here, instead of 
laboring hard to keep our religion, it keeps us. Oh, yes I 

" To dwell -within Thy wounds ; then pain 
Is sweet, and life or death is gain." 


I find as. I near the grave, in the seventy-seventh year 
of my life, the way is clear : there is "light," " clear light," 
beyond the river. Amen. So may it be ! Amen. 

I write this sketch of my experience in Christ, on Tues- 
day, the day for prayer-meeting, especially for " purity of 
heart in the blood of the Lamb," at Dr. Palmer's in New 
York. I have longed for the advantage of such a meeting 
for many years. I think it would be like the place where 
our Lord was transfigured before the disciples, "good for 
us to be here ;" but, ah ! I must die without the sight : 
nevertheless, "Thy will be done." "The Guide to Holi- 
ness," or " Christian Perfection," has ever been a blessing 
to me. Brother T. Merritt, its originator, and first editor, 
I think, was a choice fellow-laborer with me "in the 
kingdom and patience of Jesus," in the New England 
Conference, more than fifty-six years ago. Yes, yes, the 
doctrine, " If we walk in the light as He is in the light," 
&c., was well understood, experienced, and daily enjoyed 
by many in those days ; and I trust it will be our " Uriro 
and Thummim " to the end of time. 

" Then in a nobler, sweeter song, 

I'll sing Thy power to save, 
Wlien this poor lisping, stammering tongue 
Lies silent in. the grave." 



WAS converted at the age of eleven, and united 
with the M. E. Church. Soon after my con- 
version I became deeply impressed with the 
necessity of " holiness, without which no man 
shall see the Lord." By reading the memoirs of the most 
prominent among the early Methodists in the old country, 
together with the works of Messrs. Wesley and Fletcher 
on the subject, I became acquainted with the doctrine of 
sanctification, and in theory learned the power of Jesus's 
blood to " cleanse from all unrighteousness." At this early 
period of my Christian life, I became fully settled in my 
views of sanctification as a distinct blessing to be sought, 
experienced and enjoyed. The Memoir of William Bram- 
well, especially, which I read over and over again, con- 
vinced me ihat the sanctifying grace of God is an absolute 
pre-requisite to usefulness, both in the ministry and laity. 
At the age of twenty I commenced to travel under the 
Presiding Elder as a Methodist itinerant preacher. And, 
oh ! how much T suffered during that first year, from my 
convictions of the necessity of purity, and a consciousness 
that I was not all that God would have me to be. Oh ! 
how my conscience smote me when I tried to urge believers 
to " go on to perfection in Christ Jesus ! " 


Still I had many happy seasons, and saw many souls 
converted, and at times was surprised to hear Christians 
tell what a blessing some of my feeble efforts had been to 
them. But to my shame be it known, that my labors had 
only aroused them from, their slumbers, convinced them of 
the necessity of sanctiiication, but left them in the dark as 
to how it could be attained. 

Thus it was for years. There had been, and still was, 
one reserve in my consecration. Immediately after my 
conversion I was troubled with convictions of duty relative 
to the ministry. The older I became, the more pungent 
were my convictions that at some time I must preach the 
Gospel, and, although, I had been constrained to give my- 
self up to the work, and had preached for years with a 
good degree of success, by the grace of God, so far as the 
conversion of sinners was concerned, yet I had never as 
yet consented to devote myself wholly to God and His Work 
unreservedly. The truth was this : " At the age of ten 
I made up my mind to be a sailor. And if a person ever 
worked hard to accomplish any tiling, I did to enter upon 
my cherished vocation. I left no means untried ; I did all 
in my power ; several times ' I secured a berth,' but before 
the vessel sailed, Providence hedged up my way, and I 
was still left ashore. And after I yielded to my convic- 
tions and entered the ministry, I still desired 

"A life on the ocean wave 
And a Lome on the rolling deep." 

I was determined to be a Christian, and get to heaven, 
I loved to preach, and felt a deep anxiety to see souls 
saved. But, still I would think, I will preach in the con- 
ference awhile, then I will settle in some sea-port town, 
preach occasionally, (just enough to still my conscience), 
but the most of my time shall be spent in sailing, or in 
Borne way I will be identified with the shipping and com 



merce of our country. Thus you see my consecration was 
not an unreserved one. 

Things passed in this way until July, 1849. I Lad 
been absent from home several days. Returning on Satur- 
day evening about dark, Mrs. B. met me at the gate, and 
exclaimed, " Oh, my husband ! Elder Brakeman is dead 
and buried ! " The shock of an earthquake could not 
have been more startling. He was my Presiding Elder. I 
loved him as I have never loved any other man, and he 
had been more than a father to me. He was thrown from 
his horse and was killed. His death made a deep impres- 
sion upon my mind, and I felt at once to pray, " Oh, that 
his mantle might fall on me." 

The next day I had three appointments, and at each 
of them was obliged to announce the death of their P. E., 
Rev. Josiah Brakeman. I was much affected, and so was 
all the people ; and if I ever prayed in good earnest for 
any thing, it was during that day that his death might be 
blessed to me. While on the way to my third appoint- 
ment I was earnestly pleading with God to bless this heavy 
stroke to my good, and to make me a better and more 
useful man, when all at once something seemed to say, 
""What you need is entire sanctification." I responded, 
" I believe that, but how can I obtain it ? " The answer 
came, " You might have had it long ago if you had been 
willing to give np your cherished pursuit, leave the world 
leave all and live and die a devoted, self-sacrificing, 
minister of the Lord Jesus." I then solemnly vowed that 
I would not rest, until I should obtain the witness that I 
was fully sanctified. I seemed then to lose sight in part of 
Brother Brakeman's death, and soon was actually groaning 
for full redemption. Arriving at my appointment, I felt I 
could do nothing but pray for myself. If the service con- 
sisted of any thing else, I don't know what, for I never 
had any recollection of it. I was in the struggle for three 


days. Those three days are never to be forgotten. How 
I was tempted ! Satan assailed with all his power. 
Sometimes the world with all its charms, its riches, honors, 
and pleasures were presented to me, and I was bid to 
choose them. Then the toils, trials, responsibilities, and 
sufferings of an itinerant minister's life was presented, and 
I was urged to shun these. Then my solemn vows would 
stare me in the face. Then the horrible punishment that 
would follow if I should not pay those vows, would pass 
before me. Then, again, the suggestion, you are con- 
verted, and you know it ; you see sinners converted under 
your labors, and why not be satisfied with that, would be 
urged. Still at heart I felt to say, " VICTORY OR DEATH !" 

At length I reached this point. I must now choose 
between the world and hell, Jesus and Heaven; which 
shall it be ? Oh, how earnestly for a few moments, did I 
struggle, then through grace I triumphantly said with all 
the heart, " Give me Jesus." Oh, how the world with its 
beauties passed from my view ; and no sooner had I loosed 
my hold of the world, than I felt to cry out, " I cannot 
rest till pure within." Till I am wholly lost in thee." 

" Believe and it shall be done," was the answer. My 
heart responded, "I do believe with all my heart." And, 
Oh ! what a change. I did not feel like shouting, I was 
in no excitement. But, O ! how calm and beautiful ! I 
then asked, "Is the work wrought? Am I wholly the 
Lord's, and is he mine ? " The more I prayed over it the 
better satisfied I was, and have been ever since. 

From that time until now I have never doubted my 
acceptance, and have never had the least desire to abandon 
the ministry for any thing and every thing the world can 
give. And, strange as it may seem to others, it is never- 
theless true, that all my desires to sail on the ocean were 
taken away, and I now have a perfect dread and detesta 
tion of it. 


After I obtained the great blessing, I saw the vast 
difference between preaching about a thing that we know 
nothing of, and preaching what we have experienced our- 
selves. And one strong evidence to me is the fact that 
never since July, 1849, have I preached or talked on the 
subject, or even testified that " I know the blood of Jesus 
cleanseth from all unrighteousness, but I have been blessed 
in so doing, and it has proved a blessing to others. Yes, 
the " blood of Jesus cleauseth from all sin." I know it. 
And thanks be to His name that I have ever been able to 
preach this truth to others, and that I am spared to place 
my testimony on paper. 

Since the first Sabbath in November, 1866, I have been 
laid aside from my labors, my voice having been reduced 
to a mere whisper, and having suffered constantly and 
exceedingly with a chronic disease of the throat. It is 
evident that my effective work as a preacher is done. 
During these three months last passed I have been taking 
new lessons in what is called " Bearing the Cross." This 
has been a great trial to me, but still I can say, never in 
my life has Jesus been so precious as during these months 
of suffering and trial. Oh, what sweet abiding peace I 
enjoy ! what a sinking out of self into God ! what resigna- 
tion to the will of God I The Providence that laid me 
aside amid my abundant labors is to me very mysterious ; 
still I feel all the time that it is all for the best in some 
way, although I cannot see how. Oh, how full of hope 
and joy is the sweet witness, that I dwell in God, and that 
He dwelleth in me ! 

I rejoice that for nearly thirty-two years I have been 
able to testify that Jesus hath power on earth to forgive- 
sins ; and that for almost eighteen years I have been able 
to testify that His " blood cleanseth from all sin." Glory- 
be to God for a present, full salvation. Kind reader, let 
me exhort you to seek it, obtain it, live it. 



ARLY in life, I was the subject of religious 
impressions. A Christian parentage blessed 
me, and pious friends sought to instill divine 
truth into my heart. From my earliest remem- 
brance, family prayer had a most potent influence upon my 
mind. The effect of those early influences is deep and 
salutary still. The dteath of my father, when I was but 
nice years of age, placed me in a family of strangers, 
where, for several years, my advantages for religious 
training were limited. 

At times, my mind was exercised about my account- 
ability to God, and my need of salvation through the 
blood of Christ. At length, my soul was deeply wrought 
upon' by the preaching of a Methodist minister of the 
"Wesleyan connection. I professed conversion, and united 
with the class, and was baptized in the form of that church. 
For a few months, I maintained a nominal profession of 
religion with a degree of satisfaction, yet was conscious of 
a leanness. The heart was not tender: it had not been' 
resurrected into new life. About five months from my 
public confession of Christ, I was seized with the deepest 
convictions of guilt in my soul. I felt that I was lost. I 
read the Bible, and prayed, but all to no purpose. The 


wrath of God was abiding upon me : I was under condem- 
nation. My profession had been an empty show : I was 

God in infinite mercy now showed me my state of heart 
in sin and guilt. It was Sunday, a beautiful day of sun- 
shine ; but all was dark to me. I felt that I was undone : 
but I said once more, "I will go to Jesus ; He is my only hope, 

' I can but perish if I go ; 
And I'm. resolved to try.' " 

I, again fell prostrate at the feet of Jesus, and out of 
the bitter depths of my heart, cried, 

"Here, Lord, I give myself away : 
'Tis all that I can do." 

And just then Jesus accepted the offering, and spoke 
peace to my soul. The unspeakable joy I experienced no 
tongue can tell, I endeavored to tell to the Church, to 
my friends, and the world, what a Saviour I had found. 
The change I could not mistake. It was the pardoning 
love of Jesus in the soul ; and, although my pathway has 
been crooked and varied from that time until now, I have 
never, to the present moment, been left to doubt my con- 
version. In a few months, by yielding to temptation in an 
unguarded moment, I fell into a difficulty with one of the 
brethren of the Church, which grieved the Spirit. 

My heart became sad, fainted, and wandered from 
Christ. I began to live prayerlessly, and to neglect relig- 
ious meetings. Now began a most wretched experience, 
which continued nearly three years. I plunged into 
various schemes of wickedness, chose bad associates for my 
companions, and often fell into habits of profanity, intemp- 
erance, and Sabbath-breaking. But, while I inclined to 
give up Christ, He did not give me up. Frequently did I 
feel that I was wounding Christ in the house of his friends, 
and that I was "beaten with many stripes." 


At length, I was glad to return to my Father's house. 
The journey -was indeed dark and tedious. Oh the 
bitterness, the wrestlings, and the agony of my soul in 
coming "back to God ! But, blessed be His name, He met 
me in the way, and threw His arms around my neck, and 
kissed me. And now for more than fifteen years I have 
taken great delight in the service of Jesus ; but not until 
recently have I believed there was such attainments by 
faith and love as are proffered to every Christain who will, 
by simple "trust" in Jesus, receive the "sealing of the 

I said I had taken great delight in the service of Christ. 
Soon after I was reclaimed from my backslidings, I felt 
that I was called of God to preach the gospel ; and such 
was my burning love for Jesus, and anxiety for the souls 
for whom He died, that I cheerfully said, "I will go." I 
entered a course of study preparatory to the work. Soon 
my soul seemed to be impressed with the idea that the 
inclination of the students was to give too much attention 
to the "letter," and too little to the "spirit;" that too 
little care was given to have every literary attainment 
consecrated and sanctified to the great life-work of winning 
sinners to Christ. I resolved, that, whatever acquisition 
in knowledge I made, all should be laid upon the altar. 
This blessed resolution and sweet experience I was enabled 
to carry out as long as I remained in study ; and I have 
felt most deeply its influence upon my ministry. God has 
been pleased to crown my labors with constant showers of 
blesriug. But how unworthy I have felt ! and, most of all, 
a deep impression that I had not that confidence in God 
which it was my privilege to enjoy, and duty to exercise. 

In the spring of 1865, after having enjoyed a spiritual 

refreshing in revivals through the winter, I was impressed 

as never before that there was something in Christ for me 

which I had never received, and that Pie was proffering me 


REV. A. P. GRAVES. 153 

the blessing. This conviction was attended with deep 
searchings of heart ; and, the more I examined my heart, 
the more I saw its vilensss. My soul was panting for the 
fullness of Christ's love. 

The words of Jesus, " Come unto me, all ye that labor 
and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest," came fresh 
to my mind. "Well," said I, "He spoke them for the 
sinner ; and I have been giving them to the sinner these 
dozen years : they are not for me." But a voice contin- 
ually whispered, "They are for you" These feelings of 
desire and trial to do something to satisfy my thirsting 
soul continued for months. At length, the words above 
referred to pressed my heart so much that 1 began to make 
Q personal application of them. I said, "What is this 
idea of rest as presented by Jesus? " It was thus illustrated 
to me : Suppose I, wearied from toil, return home, and 
say to my friends, " I am very weary, and will retire to 
rest :" I professedly take my bed for this -purpose, but 
spend the night agitated in feeling, with disquiet and toss- 
ings. Now, can I rise in the morning, and say I have had 
rest ? So it seemed in my soul I had professed to be a 
Christian, and no doubt had possessed a good hope which 
has been as an anchor of the soul for many years, but had 
not rest. 

Like Martha, I was cumbered about much serving. 
The waves were rippled : I did not rest by simple trust in 

I felt deeply conscious that greater heights in spiritual 
things were attainable ; but to reach them was my difficulty. 
It seemed I would give all the world, did I possess it, or 
do anything if I could but enjoy the fullness of that peace 
that passeth all understanding. 

I tried again and again, with heart, lips, and pen, to 
consecrate my all to Jesus and His service; and fo* 
months my daily cry was, "Oh for a subdued heart!' 


But, with all my doing, something would frequently 

" Cast your deadly doing down, 

Down at Jesus' feet : 
Stand in lam, in liim alone, 
All glorious and complete." 

The labor of my hands, at this time, greatly increased,, 
Inquiring sinners and rejoicing converts multiplied daily. 
Never did my ministry seem more responsible and important, 
and never did I feel so unfit to perform it. I dare not tell 
any one the state of my own heart. But oh, what trials 
as I felt the sad want of faith, that weighed down my soul! 
When I directed sinners to believe in Christ, some still 
voice within would say, " Why don't you believe yourself?^ 
Again, and again, did I try to " cast my deadly doing 
down." I wrote out a full consecration of my all to Jesus, 
and in solemn prayer signed it upon my knees. 

I tried over and over again to examine my heart as 
with a "lighted candle," but ah 1 to no purpose ; and I daily 
found that I was "trying many things of many physicians," 
and was nothing better, but rather grew worse. 

" Oh ! " said I, " is it so hard for a Christian to let go, 
and simply trust Jesus ? " After spending several months 
in deep searchings of heart, a friend put the little tract, 
" The Living Christ," into my hand. The reading of each 
line awakened increased interest, and anxiety in the mattei 
of believing, trusting. The way appeared plain ; but to 
do the thing was a seeming impossibility. " Oh for a sub- 
dued heart ! " was the constant language of my soul. 
Daily I felt that I could not go and preach to my dear 
people again ; that it was almost wicked to stand up as a 
public teacher with such a tiard, unbroken state of heart. 

I determined to appoint a clay of fasting and prayer, 
hoping that by this means I might obtain liberty to my 
captive soul. I did appoint it ; but thank God, when the 

REV. A. P. GRAVES. 155 

time arrived I was compelled to turn it into a clay of 

Before my soul deeplj panted for the "baptism of the 
Spirit," I had heard through kind friends of the meeting at 
Dr. Palmer's, and was invited to attend. I concluded to 
do so before the day appointed for fasting arrived. I went. 
The experiences related somewhat illustrated my case. I 
felt interested, and measured every word. I stated my 
exercises of mind to the meeting, and was told to try and 
"trust in Jesus." I said, "I have been trying a long time 
to believe ; but the thing is to do it." Again I fell upon 
my knees, and endeavored 'to give up all, and "trust," but 
to no purpose. Still my heart was hard and unrelenting ; 
and again I cried, " Oh for sweet rest in Jesus ! " I felt so 
unworthy and so rebellious, that I was tempted to conclude 
that I should never enjoy this blessed experience. But a 
voice sweetly whispered, "Jesus has promised you the 
blessing : trust him, accept it." 

Wearied, anxious, and still unbelieving, I returned 
home. "While on the way, something seemed to say to me 
in a most signal tone, " Cast thy burden on the Lord." 
This precious passage never appeared so to me before. It 
came as the healing balm. I quickly said, " I will. Lord, 
if it be selfishness, unholy ambition, worldly pride, the will 
of man, any thing, every thing, whatever may hinder my 
simple t trust in Jesus,' I surrender all to thee.' " Still the 
passage was like a "bright light" before me; and I felt a 
consciousness that I had cast all at Jesus' feet, and that in 
His own way and time He would emancipate my burdened 
soul. I retired to rest, leaving all to Him. At an unusually 
early hour, I awoke. The room was silent and dark ; but 
in an instant the darkness passed away, and a bright light 
filled the room. The light of life seemed to be all around 
me, and Jesus appeared, not altogether in the form of a 
person, but as filling immensity with his presence. 


I never had such a view of Christ, or experienced such 
feelings, before. All the hardness of my heart was broken 
up instantly, and my soul launched out into Christ like 
launching a boat upon the bosom of a smooth lake. Just 
now that blessed Scripture, " Bring ye all the tithes into 
the storehouse, that there may be meat in mine house, and 
prove nae now herewith, saith the Lord of hosts, if I will 
not open you the windows of heaven, and pour out a 
blessing, that there shall not be room enough to receive it," 
appeared to me in all its fullness. I said, " I cannot surely 
contain this." Oh, how my soul was filled with the fullness 
of Christ's love! The tears freely flowed, and my pillow 
was wet as with the dew of the morning. Christ was " all 
in all." "I was filled with the Spirit," and I felt, that, 
after traveling a long and tedious journey over pathless 
wastes and through burning sands, I had now arrived at 
the golden gates of the city ; yea, had entered and now 
dwelt in the bright mansions of love. All was peace. 

I arose and made a record of gratitude to Gk)d for this 
infinite and unspeakable blessing. Immediately I found 
every thing changed concerning my faith in Christ, and my 
relations to him as a full and complete Saviour. 

Never did he appear so much the unchangeable One 
" the same, yesterday, to-day, and forever." " His yoke 
became easy and His burden light ; " and, on reflection, I 
could hardly believe that I had lived and toiled so long 
without this precious blessing of "sweet rest in Jesus." 

I have been led to believe, judging somewhat from 
appearance, as also from my own experience, that this 
blessing is the great want of 'the Church now; that all 
alike, ministers and laj'men, imperatively need the baptism 
of the Spirit " of fire," and of power from on high, that 
they may convincingly and with conquering power witness 
for Jesus. 



OR many years I have been entirely satisfied* 
from a most blessed experience, that the 
atoning blood can cleanse from all sin. It is 
many years since I received the gracious full- 
ness of the Saviour's merits. I was about eighteen years 
old, having then been a member a little more than four 
years, and a class leader between two and three. I had 
for some tune belonged to a land, fasted every Friday, 
met regularly, and enjoyed much of the divine favor, still 
often feeling that native defilement which I am fully con- 
vinced remains in every heart after justification. It was a 
season of great spiritual interest. Many were finding 
peace with God many the blessing of perfect love. My 
own soul was constantly thirsting for entire deliverance. 
I went to a quarterly meeting witnessed much of the 
power of God felt much myself but did not receive the 
witness of the removal of the native corruption of the 
heart. Sunday evening went to a prayer meeting in my 
own class; several were awakened, some converted, and 
one made perfect in love. My thirst after God greatly 
increased, but not satiated. I got into the carriage to 
return home, about six miles, with my brother and his 
wife, and a young lady who was about to spend some time 


in my brother's family, with whom I was conversing rela- 
tive to the meeting we had just left. I was saying to her 
that my soul had heen greatly blessed : and while in the 
act of expressing my obligations of gratitude to God for 
His abundant blessings, I received a shock which extended 
throughout the system, as though a quantity of ice water 
had been thrown upon me. This shock was as new as 
unexpected, and I did not know but I was about to be 
summoned suddenly into the presence of God. I said to 
the sister by my side, I felt as never before, and did not 
riot know what would be the issue, but desired to say to 
her that my soul was happy in God. Immediately upon 
saying this, I felt another shock of divine power, which at 
once prostrated me helpless on the floor of the carriage. 
I remained helpless and nearly speechless till we arrived 
at my brother's* house. I gained a little strength when 
near home, and my brother and his wife succeeded in get- 
ting me into the house, and placing me in an arm chair, 
where for a moment or two I feebly praised God, when I 
was again, by the power of God, stricken to the floor. 
This was about ten o'clock in the evening ; and from this 
time till two o'clock in the morning I was lost to all below, 
and completely absorbed in contemplations of the divine 
glory. My friends who stood by me informed me that I 
said nothing, except at intervals of about half-an-hour I 
repeated the word eternity with great solemnity. I then 
felt that 

" Christ was all in all to me, 
And all my soul was love." 

About two o'clock in the morning I regained my 
strength. And, being tinder the influence of 

" The speechless awe that dares not move," 

And filled 

"With all the silent heaven of love," 

EEV. J. S. MITCHELL, D. D. 159 

I retired to my bed, but not to sleep, but to lie in the 
bosom of my all sufficient Saviour. I felt as if basking in 
the presence of God, as if bathing sweetly in the ocean of 
perfect love. For many weeks, night and day, whenever 
awake, the same indescribable peace, the same hallowed 
fullness, continued without abatement. Mine was a 
cloudless sky. It was not so much rapture, as the fullness 
of the divine favor. I realized that I " dwelt in God, and 
God in me." My whole soul was calm as the opening 
morning, and so continued without a moment's interrup- 
tion for many weeks. I was young and timid, and feared 
to confess all my feelings and assurances. 

I have given this imperfect narrative of an event 
which occurred nearly fifty years since, to show some 
of my obligations to divine grace, and to indicate that 
point, and that fact in my brief history, which are at the 
foundation of whatever of usefulness or Christian decision 
have marked my course. I secured an unction and power 
with God then, which I had not possessed before, and 
which, though my life has been too uneven, (alas ! alas !) 
I have never, even for a day, wholly lost. My soul is now 
solemnly and sweetly fixed on God. 

I will conclude by saying that, after an uninterrupted 
membership in the M. E. Church of over fifty-three years ; 
preacher and exhorter over forty-eight years ;~ traveling 
preacher over forty-four years ; having come into the rest 
of perfect love forty-eight years last Spring, I never 
loved the Church so well,: nor enjoyed so constant a 
sense of the divine fullness, nor delighted so much to 
preach Christ to saint and sinner, as able to save to the 
uttermost, as now. 



HE afternoon of the Sabbath, on which I joined 
the M. E. Church, found me alone in my 
chamber, engaged in prayer and meditation, 
and while thus employed I found peace in 
believing. The only explanation I can give of my experi- 
ence at this time is this : "While thinking of divine good- 
ness in redemption, and particularly of the resurrection of 
Christ, I felt an influence of love, suddenly pervading my 
heart, so unlike any thing I had ever realized before, that 
I received it as immediately from God. I wondered, not 
only at the loving kindness and condescension of Him I 
had so insulted and grieved, but at myself for having so 
long remained in ignorance of a something so delightful, 
and perfectly within my reach. My heart was, indeed, 
strangely warmed ; and its prevailing desire was to get my 
arms about the world, and lay it at the feet of my 

From childhood an impression had followed me that 
God would call me to the ministry ; and so strong did this 
impression become that, at length, I had no hope of 
acceptance with Him while I withheld my consent. This, 
I am persuaded, helped to keep me irreligious for some 


When I was seeking pardon, the subject was readily 
disposed of by leaving it to the Lord. My call to the 
ministry was early recognized by the Church ; ere I com- 
pleted my probation, I was sent out in a stress of circum 
stances by the preachers to fill their appointments, and 
the close of ten months, as a professor of religion, found 
me a licensed local preacher. 

The way into the itinerancy mysteriously to me at 
the time did not open so readily ; still the fields for useful 
labor whitened all around me. In Autumn of the year 
1841, my father fell at his post (St. Mary's Circuit, Md.), 
nobly battling for his Master to the last. At the instance 
of the Circuit, I, by a seeming sacrifice, filled cut his Con- 
ference year. Returning to Virginia, I resumed my busi- 
ness as a teacher, and found ample opportunity, as a local 
preacher, to stir up the gift that ivas m me. The colored 
people, especially, recognized me as a preacher raised up 
for them. From seventy to eighty embraced religion in 
one season ; some of whom preachers and laymen 
remain unto this day, "but some are fallen asleep." In 
March, 1844, 1 was admitted into the Baltimore Annual 
Conference on trial; and have been on the effective list 
ever since. 

My convictions on the subject of sanctification have 
not, throughout, been as uniform as were my early con- 
victions for sin. On entering the ministry I received our 
theology entire as of the Bible. As far as I had tested it, 
I had demonstrated its truth, and I readily inferred in its 
favor where I had not experimented upon it. The advice 
of my seniors was, preach sanctification, whether you 
enjoy it or not, preach it until you do enjoy it. Acting on 
this advice, I frequently introduced the subject into my 
sermons, and, mostly, with gracious effect. I was, occa- 
sionally, subjected to mingled emotions of pleasure and 
shame, in hearing my efforts on this subject acknowledged 


in the detail of religious experience ; pleasure that God 
had thus honored me ; shame that laic experience should 
be so in advance of my own. 

A striking instance of this may be admissable just here. 
Elijah Merchant, a young man of Augusta County, Va., 
obtained the blessing of perfect love, and in professing it, 
acknowledged his indebtedness to a sermon of mine. The 
manner in which this experience was narrated producing 
the mingled emotions above referred to impressed me 
that God had called him to the ministry. Such being his 
own conviction, I procured a recommendation to the 
Annual Conference for him. He traveled his first year 
as my colleague ; and was more abundant in labors than 
almost any other man I ever knew. He always deferred 
to me as his superior, yet, imperceptibly to him, his 
elevated style of piety always impressed me Avith my com- 
parative religious insignificance. In 1852 he was selected 
for the California work, and soon fell a martyr to his 
missionary zeal. 

Strange to say ! about the time this young man entered 
upon his labors on the Pacific coast, my theory of sanctifi- 
cation began to undergo some modification. The late 
l?ev. John Hersey whose fidelity to the rigid simplicity 
of primitive Methodism has passed into a proverb 
wherever he was known published a work on this 
subject, convicting the Wesleyan theory, as was supposed, 
of marked inconsistencies, maintaining the oneness of con- 
version and sanctification ; and that religion throughout is 
but a system of growth. Though this work was early sup- 
pressed by the author, at the instance of his quarterly 
Conference, officially expressed for' his relation to the 
Church was that of a local preacher it has been suffi- 
ciently before the public to embolden a secret skepticism, 
which seemed to be awaiting the favorable opportunity for 


The subject came up for discussion before the 
Preachers' Meeting of Baltimore, of which I was a 
member, and, to my mind, at the time, the Hersey theory 
seemed the more ably sustained. Unfortunately as I 
now see I embraced it ; and soon became intensely 
opposed to the sanctification hobby, as it was called. The 
natural result was, I did not preach it as clearly as I had 
done, and suffered corresponding loss of ministerial power. 
I sometimes mourned deeply the seeming decline of my 
usefulness, and painfully queried the reason why ? I had 
large and attentive congregations ; I tried to declare the 
whole counsel of God, as I understood it; still there 
seemed to be something lacking. I occasionally reviewed 
my new theory of sanctification, and, at length, was com- 
pelled to concede the following points, namely : 

1. If conversion and sanctijication be identical, I cer- 
tainly was not converted, for I feel the remains of the 
carnal mind still lurking within ; and, while I have love, it 
is not that perfect love which casts out all tormenting fear. 

2. If conversion and sanctification be identical, it seems 
strange that I should not be as much favored in preaching 
them so, as I formerly was in presenting them after the 
Wesleyan theory. 

3. If conversion and sanctification be the same, it seems 
strange that so many excellent people, the least likely to 
be deceived in spiritual matters, should have believed, 
experienced, and taught differently, even with their latest 
breath, and under the inspiration of their final and 
greatest triumph. { 

4. And, finally, if they be identical, why do I net 
grow in grace, in believing and teaching them, as rapidly as 
"I did when I believed and taught differently? 

The result of such reflections was to bring me back to 
my old theory, and to some of my former enjoyments in 
preaching it. 


In the year 1862 I was appointed Presiding Elder of 
the Baltimore District (E. Balti. Conf.); a post of respon- 
sibility which, I felt, demanded the improvement of my 
Christian graces. In essaying to act on my convictions, I 
felt that I was making some religions progress. In 1864, 
while attending the General Conference in Philadelphia, I 
experienced some serious premonitions of nervous prostra- 
tion which, however, measurably disappeared in a few 
months. But toward the close of the Conference year, 
death laid his hand on my eldest daughter, and though 
she departed in peace, trusting in Jesus, the event helped 
to revive the evidences of my physical weakness. Shortly 
after the succeeding Conference, I was compelled to desist 
from active duty, hoping that a few weeks of rest would 
work wonders for my health ; but my few weeks extended 
to nearly five months. 

Meanwhile I concluded that, as I could not preach to 
others, I might as well address myself to the work of per- 
sonal improvement in experimental relit/ion. Fond of 
biography, especially of early Wesleyan biography, I 
re-read Carvosso and Hester Ann Eogers. I took Mr. 
Fletcher's experience as given by Mrs. Eogers, and I 
" reckoned myself dead unto sin." I took the theory of 
the Altar, as reported from Mrs. Palmer, for I had not 
then read any of her works, and made a full consecration 
of myself to God; and I felt, at the time, that I had not 
sacrificed in vain ; though I had not that fullness of 
internal evidence which I desired. On this latter account 
I concluded not to be hasty in my public confession of the 
llcssinff, but to take time for thorough self-examination by 
the most reliable tests ; and I was the more inclined to be 
backward, from the fact that such a profession seemed a 
little too much for me. I told my wife, but no one else. 

About that time I obtained the life of Bramwell, and, 
weak and nervous as I was, it had well nigh proved too 


strong meat for me. When I compared his devotion and 
godly might with my own inefficiency, I became utterly 
discouraged. I descended to a gloomy valley, seemingly 
bounded only by the mount of the law. Yet, singular as 
it may seem, in its deepest solitudes, I could, with Peter, 
appeal to the searcher of hearts, and say, " Thou knowest 
all things ; Thou knowest that I love Thee." Assailed by 
the fiercest temptations, with but little bodily strength to 
bear up under my mental depressions, and greatly hindered 
by my unbelief, I said, continually, with Job, " Though He 
slay me, yet will I trust in Him." 

But, by degrees, I accepted the fact that there was 
another mount on the boundary of my valley, and that 
was Calvary, and by getting nearer to it, I arose gradually 
from my morbidness and gloom. On resuming the duties 
of my district, I oft alluded to my recent experiences, and 
in naming my act of consecration, would go so far as to 
assert, in a negative form, my belief in its acceptance ; that 
is, I asserted ' that, "I would not say it had not been 
accepted ;" and I urged others to go and do likewise. 

One evening, after I had indulged in this train of 
remark, in a love feast, a brother in whom I had great 
confidence arose, and said, " The key note has been given 
out right this evening ; I have lived in the enjoyment of 
perfect love for some time." At this I felt greatly encour- 
aged. Next day, as 'I was reflecting on the subject, I 
queried, Why is not my evidence brighter ? What am I 
waiting for? Do I ever expect to say, well done, to 
myself? No ; "for by the deeds of the law, shall no man 
living be justified." How then, if I cannot be perfect in 
or of myself, am I to reach fully the blessing of perfection? 
Why, I must be complete in Christ. If then my complete- 
ness is to be in Christ, is it not as much mine to claim now, 
as it ever will be ? Most assuredly. Then my heart said 
with a power of faith, it had not exercised before, it is 


mine ; and, coincident with my faith, I, by the Spirit, had 
the full assurance of faith. I was exceedingly filled with 
love and peace ; and having to preside in a quarterly con- 
ference an evening or two afterward, when the business 
was concluded, I bore my positive, unqualified testimony 
to the power of the atoning blood, to cleanse from all sin. 
So I did all around the district, in the quarterly confer- 
ences, quarterly love feasts, from the pulpit, and in the 
social circle. On this elevation I stand to-day, and expect, 
through grace, to stand to the end. 

I have, by this experience, gained much in every way. 
Fullness and uniformity appear to be the words most 
expressive of my present, in contrast with my past enjoy- 
ments. I am living more by faith, and less bj r impulse. 
Formerly I often obeyed the divine law from a sheer sense 
of duty ; now, I love the law because " it is holy, and just, 
and good." Formerly temptation from without found 
some responses from within, of which I am now happily 
relieved. Formerly I dreaded sudden death, desiring 
some little notice before / tvent hence to be no more, that I 
might assure myself of thorough preparation ; now I live 
to please God, perfectly satisfied that thus living, I cannot 
die wrong. In a word, I feel that I am a better man, a 
better preacher, better every way ;. not in .or of myself 
for I never understood my own insignificance so well but 
through Him that hath loved me, and given Himself for me, 
and washed me in His own olood. To the ever adorable 
Trinity, Father, Son, and Holy Ghost, be equal, and 
undivided, and everlasting praise. Amen. 



S a member of the Methodist Church, yet with 
very little religion, I found myself, early in 
February, 1849, entering the " Golden Gate" 
of San Francisco harbor, intent on demonstrat- 
ing my gold-finding qualities. A few hours' experience on 
shore satisfied me that I should have to be a better man, 
or else, with many others, give up, to drift away on the 
swift current of sin. I rejoice that I soon resolved to seek, 
in the grace of God, security from the moral ruin into 
which multitudes were swept. During the first year of my 
residence there, Rev. William Taylor, then from the Balti- 
more Conference, arrived ; and he has especially endeared 
himself to me by pressing home to my conscience, in a kind 
manner, the subject of perfect love. 

After a while, by the voice of the Church and my own 
sense of duty, I gave up fair worldly prospects, and was 
one of two who entered the ministry of the M. E. Church 
at the first session of the California Conference. "While I 
was traveling my second circuit, which was principally 
in the Sierra-Nevada Mountains, and extended about two 
hundred and fifty miles, amid profanity, gambling, Sab- 
bath-breaking, robbery, and murder, I believe I enjoyed 
this great blessing. Constant labor and exposure brought 


on sickness, which, compelled me at last to give up my 
appointment. I had then been four years in California : 
so I determined to seek both health and a better qualifica- 
tion for the ministry in the Eastern States. Both were 
attained in due time. Then for seven months I took 
charge of the church of an invalid minister, and God 
crowned the endeavor with the conversion of over a hundred 
precious souls. Yet I hesitated to commit my all to him 
and the ministry. I loved to preach the gospel, but feared, 
when I might be disqualified through age or sickness for 
further ministerial service, I should find myself very 
dependent or impoverished. How I needed holiness then, 
to have saved two or three years, which were spent in 
occasional preaching, rather than consecutive effort and 
entire devotion to the Lord's work ! 

At last the " Woe is me if I preach not the gospel ! " 
sounded so threateningly, that, by the grace of God, I was 
enabled to accept the attendant risks, and give myself 
exclusively to the work of the ministry. When once fully 
engaged thus, the great need of holiness, as a power in my 
h'fe and preaching, frequently claimed my deepest regard. 
Indeed, I groaned after it so fervently, that more than once 
my faith claimed it; but, for some reason known or 
unknown at the time, I. would not retain .it more than a 
few weeks together. 

This fluctuation in the way of holiness, which I had 
never discovered in myself in regard to any thing else, 
humbled me deeply. By inheritance from family and race, 
and the chidings of conscience, I believed myself pertina- 
cious rather than vacillating. Why, then, could I not 
endure as seeing Him who is invisible, and follow him very 
closely ? But I could not. I seemed to fall as frequently 
as a child just learning to wall?. The consciousness of 
stability in justification only intensified the sorrow of 
instability in sanctification. Notwithstanding these dis- 


couragements, my convictions of the truthfulness and 
desirability of the blessing continued. I found that in its 
absence there remained a recollection of the love and zeal 
that formerly inflamed me : of course I had strong desires 
to repossess it, and these influences tended to new con- 
secrations of myself to God. 

" Te i'earful souls, fresh courage take ;" 

for there is a residuum of good to those who inadvertently 
lose, but do not disown, the great salvation. A prince, 
though far away from courtly circles, would evince his 
training. Is it possible to have so much light, and such 
intimate converse with Jesus, without bearing princely ways 
and views with us even into the " wilderness state ? " Oh ! 
it is lest not to lose it ; but who refuses any other good 
thing whatever from a mere dread of losing it ? And how 
well we know that God is able to keep that which we 
commit to His hand ! 

On the second day of July 1865, being Sunday, I arose 
early in the morning, and briefly reviewed my dozen years 
of fluctuation in the midst of the deepest contrition of soul. 
The Holy Spirit showed me then, as never before, that it 
was not optional with me to live in the strength of holiness, 
but that I must possess and keep it, or lose my soul. That 
was an alarming view, and one which I was satisfied the 
Holy Spirit presented. I said to myself, " This vacillation 
shall end." 
- " When ? " was my mental inquiry. 

" Now." 




" By immediately and without re serve giving all to God." 

I prostrated myself, and said, " Lord, thus lowly shall 
I -be when I die ; and, as then I shall be divested of every 


thing earthly, so now DO I divest myself of every thing 
tliou would'st not have me hold, including any thing shown 
me hereafter ; and now, without waiting one moment, or 
asking any sign of feeling, I steadfastly beneve thou dost 
receive me." A little rill of peace came ; no more. I 
said, " It's done ! My wavering is o'er, and my goings 
are established in the Lord.'' I went forth to do for God 
just as though I had the most indubitable witness of full 
acceptance. Jn the absence of any special emotion, I had 
to walk for several days insisting that the work was done. 
My lips or heart were almost constantly repeating, " / am 
thine : thou dost receive me." The light gradually increased ; 
my peace became like a river ; the word of God had alto- 
gether neAv interest ; my soul was made very happy during 
preaching, which was a new experience ; I could laugh at 
my previous fear of want in old age ; and oh, what an 
' intensified love for all God's children ! Eevelation after 
revelation of light and joy, peace and power, were made to 
me ; and I beheld in sauctification a way of wondrous 

Now the mistakes of the past are very apparent. I 
used to struggle for joy as the requisite evidence of my 
acceptance ; the joy gone, I sank into darkness and des- 
pondency. How the cold waves of unbelief rolled over me 
as I yielded up " the jewel of my trust " ! I was off and on, 
off and on, from year to year. But feeling is no longer a 
criterion. So, before, if I felt the least departure from 
God, I gave up all as gone, and fell back into justification. 
Then came defeats and flights, and the banner of the Lord 
would be sullied with earthly contact for weeks and 
months. Now, if I suffer a check on my onward march, it 
is but for a moment ; and, looking immediately to the Cap- 
tain of my salvation, what Avould otherwise prove a defeat 
and rout, with long-continued shame, he turns into a signal 
victory. Then my soul is filled with joy at the Lord's 


triumpli over my strong foe. I see now that a defectivt 
experience comes from a defective faith, indefinitcness is the 
parent of defectivene&s. 

Now I labor in a different way, and with more success. 
In business, reading, meditation, conversation, testimony, 
prayer, and preaching, I saturate my mind with the 
thought of holiness ; and then, if something demands my 
attention calculated to absorb my whole thought, my mind 
is so imbued with grace, I do not suffer from abstraction, 
but I work through these things towai'ds the glory of God. 
Is not this the way we are to keep ourselves in the love of 
God ? In public labors, I look for a definite blessing ; and 
God has signally owned it. 

Now my emotions are different and better. I do 
not find it necessary to pray for joy. For weeks together, 
each day has seemed like a bright Sabbath in June, 
when the birds are singing, and the mild, balmy air 
was fragrant with flowers, and the church going bell calls 
you to duties that are as pleasant as pastime sports. The 
sweet and quiet state of my mind is so abiding, it seems 
the millennium: morn has dawned on me. I do not know 
how long it may be before it comes to all ; but, as Simeon 
rejoiced for the Messiah in his arms, so do I for the mill en. - 
nium in my heart ! Praise the Lord, O my soul ! Christ 
enables me to do all things to His glory ; for, if I conferred 
with flesh and blood, this my testimony would not be so 
explicit of my years of moral desolation : but he has taught 
me to " count all things loss for the excellency of the know- 
ledge of Christ Jesus my Lord." It is my sincere prayer 
that this experience may aid some desponding child of 
Jesus to so consecrate all, and believe for all, that hence- 
forth he may say, " I can do all things through Christ 
which strengtheneth me." 




" Hallelujah ! I believe ! 

Now no longer on nay soul 
All tlie debt of sin is lying 

One great Friend has paid tlie whole '. 
Ice-bound fields of legal labor 

I have left with all their toil ; 
While the fruits of love are growing 

From a new and genial soil."' 

Y soul shall make lier boast in the Lord ; the 
humble shall hear thereof and be glad. O 
magnify the Lord with me, and let us exalt 
his name together. I sought the Lord and he 
heard me and delivered me from all my fears. " Thi? poor 
man cried and the Lord heard him, and saved him out of 
all his troubles." 

I am called upon for my personal testimony and expe- 
ence respecting "perfect love which casteth out fear." 
Gladly do I confess, as a witness of Christ's grace and 
faithfulness and power, that He has, by His Word and 
Spirit, given me to know in my happy experience, the blessed 
truth of "perfect love " and freedom from all fear that hath 
torment, as the present privilege of every soul that trusts 
Him fully. I had some glimpses of this fullness of salvation. 


under the aspect of "foil assurance of faith," soon after 
my conversion, which gracious favor God gave me through 
the personal experimental testimony of a dear saint, and 
through the perusal of that evangelical old work, Marshall's 
Gospel Mystery of Sanctification. But it was about 
thirteen years afterwards, when my soul was weary, veiy 
weaiy, in long and vain attempts to keep and sanctify 
myself by watchfulness and the means of grace, and when 
God's service seemed to become hopeless, because I knew 
not how to "wait on the Lord, and mount up with wings 
as eagles, and run and not be weary, and walk and not 
faint," that Pie revealed His fullness to me. In the valley 
of affliction and humiliation the Lord visited my soul. 
Blessed be His name for ever! "I will bring her into 
the wilderness, and speak comfortably unto her ; and I 
will give her her vineyards from thence ; and the valley of 
Achor (trouble) for a door of hope." 

The reading of Boardman's Higher Christian Life gave 
me, by the blessing of God's Spirit, the first glimpse of 
"full assurance of faith," as an abiding llcssing, in 
its proper connection with the experience and state of 
entire sanctification to the Lord, in soul, spirit and 
body, in all things and at all times, by full consecration 
and full faith. This is the "adoption of sons" in its 
full and constant realization. This happy experience 
the Lord gave me a few days afterward, by the aid of 
dear saints, in the meeting for holiness held at Dr. 
Palmer's, New York ; the Holy Spirit using their testimony 
to make His word plain, and to encourage and guide me 
in giving myself at once, wholly, without reserve, and for 
ever to Christ, and to God through Christ, a living sacri- 
fice, and to believe on the ground of His own word that 
He received me in Christ "without spot or wrinkle or any 
such tiling." No tongue can tell the rest and sweetness 
and peace of the soul which truly and fully, and, every 


moment, embraces Christ and abides in Him, " as of God 
made unto us, wisdom, righteousness, sanctification, and 

It was but a few days until the Lord gave me a few 
among my own dear people, as the sharers of my joy. 
When in public and private my soul made her boast in the 
Lord, and I told what He had done for me. And while 
for years the fellowship of the saints, in the meeting where 
first the Lord taught me the way of holiness by simple 
faith in Christ, was as a foretaste of heaven, the little band, 
whose hearts God opened to receive the truth of full 
salvation, in my own church, were my crown and my joy, 
amidst coldness, misrepresentation and opposition. In my 
present field God has helped me ; and some of my flock, 
some theological students, and one or more ministers, have 
acknowledged the truth of entire sanctification by faith, in 
a living, present Saviour. Eternity alone will suffice to 
tell the whole story. Thanks for this and every opportu- 
nity to witness for Jesus, as a Saviour from all sin, for it is 
not only an important duty, but a delightful privilege to 
" boast in the Lord ;" a boasting which exposes, and forever 
abandons self, as utterly bankrupt and vile, and receives 
and enjoys and rejoices in Christ as " all in all," not 
merely in theory and doctrine but in actual, personal 
experience. O for this baptism of power upon all God's 
people. "Unto Him that loved us and washed us from 
our sins in His own blood, and hath made us kings and 
priests unto God and His Father; to Him be glory and 
dominion, for ever and ever. Amen ! " 



T pleased Almighty God to bring me to a knowl- 
edge of the truth as it is in Christ Jesus, when 
only about sixteen years of age. I do not pur- 
pose in this communication to say anything in 
reference to this eventful period of my life, farther than that 
I was united in class-meeting with a band of faithful, holy 
men of God, who clearly indoctrinated me by their experi- 
ence in the necessity of going on to perfection. At that 
time there was in this (Father A. Russell's) class, George 
Erebs (a blind man), Quincy Maynard, John L. Eees, Job 
Guest, and many others who were giants in their day. 
Soon after, I, on account of my being attached to the 
Sunday School, with some others, were set ofF to ti class 
meeting at night, under Quincy Maynard as the leader. 
Being in the enjoyment of perfect love himself, he fully 
explained and insisted upon its immediate enjoyment by 
the members of his class. I was soon brought to feel the 
necessity of it, and as a consequence gave up myself wholly 
to the Lord thus early in my Christian experience, being 
about eighteen years of age. 

At that tune all were clearly taught this doctrine on 
every hand, from the true Wesleyan stand-point, conse- 
quently there were very few indeed who had any misgiv 


ings whatever upon it, and were saved from falling into 
many of the errors of the present day. After seeking this 
grace for some short time, I was brought to apprehend it 
by naked, simple faith alone in the all atoning merit of the 
precious blood of Christ. I saw then that that blood was 
shed for me, to save me not only from the guilt of my past 
offenses, but from the power and pollution of sin for the 
time to come. Through the mercy of God I was enabled 
to cast my soul on it fully, and realize its immediate efficacy 
in my own case. I was then and there permitted to enjoy 
the assurance that Christ Jesus was mine and " fully " in 
this sense. I continued to grow in this grace daily, and 
became more and more fully absorbed in Christ. I have 
been enabled to maintain my integrity in this grace from 
that to the present time. 

Since I enjoyed this blessing, being called of God to 
the work of the ministry, I have again and again preached 
it in its simplicity to others, whenever the opportunity was 
afforded me, first as an itinerant Methodist Preacher, and 
then iii the local ranks. As I have grown older in this 
hallowed work, I have been brought to make it almost 
wholly the principal topic of my ministerial labors, and 
am now more than ever confirmed in it, in my own 
personal enjoyment of it, and more than ever convinced 
that this should be the case with every preacher of the 
Gospel, if he desires to see the pleasure of the Lord 
prosper in his hands. Such evidently was the view of 
it entertained by our fathers. They always kept it 
before the people, without any fear of its being misunder- 
stood and misapplied. The people were taught by them 
that they were to be regenerated by the power of the 
Holy Ghost with the design aud purpose of going on to 
perfection of love. When converted they then felt 
the necessity of this deeper baptism of the Spirit, and 
went forward to the attainment of it. Some in a few 


days after their conversion, and others at a later period 
of life. 

I am fully convinced that, in this way, and because of 
the truth thus early enforced, they were able to preserve to 
the Church many, very many more of those who entered 
it, than we have been of late years. Our fathers were 
pre-eminently men of two books, the Bible and Hymn-book, 
in both of which are clearly set forth the doctrine in all its 
phases. They preached it, and then sang it, wherever 
they went as heralds of the Cross, and our -people were 
saved generally from falling into any error on the subject. 
The older Methodists were, in this particular, more gener- 
ally and more fully given up to God, than those of the 
present day, and were much less liable to be led astray by 
the vanities of life. They have nearly all passed away, 
and unless we, their children, are much more fully and 
entirely devoted to God, those blessed days will never 
return to us again. It is to be hoped that we shall see and 
feel the importance of it to us as a people, and that we will 
speedily come up to the help of the Lord against the 
mighty. This grace is the same now as then, its effects are 
the same, and it is not possible to attain it but by the same 
simple process of present, immediate faith in Christ. 

I thank God that it is so. Its gracious results I know 
and feel at the present moment. During the long contin- 
uence of my present affliction, now fifteen weeks confined 
to bed, I have been supported by it. In every moment of 
this time I have found it to be the one thing needful. 
Through its power I have been graciously preserved from 
every anxious care. Not one doubt or fear has arisen to 
darken my sky, or hide for one moment the Saviour from 
my eyes. At times my peace is so full, that I have felt 
myself to be as a mere mote floating in an ocean of light 
and glory. The will of God is my will, I desire to be 
governed altogether by it. 


" Thy will not mine be done 
My -will and tMne be one," 

is I think honestly the motto of my life, and constantly 
before my eyes. Nothing more do I desire and nothing 
less. I attribute this state altogether to the enjoyment of 
perfect love, which now pervades my whole being. To 
God be all the glory. Oh that His people would suffer 
the Divine Being thus to fill and rule them. I have no 
desire to make choice between life and death, but for my 
will to be entirely lost in that of God. If God in His 
Providence should see fit to take me to Himself, I entirely 
submit, and cheerfully resign myself to it. If, on the contrary, 
He sees fit to return me back again to life, I trust I shall 
employ it more fully than ever in spreading through 
society at large the simple tidings that His Hood cleanseth 
from all sin. Death to me has no sting. The grave brings 
no desolation. Whilst in weakness I pen these few lines, 
my soul is unutterably filled with 

" Glory and with. God." 

I would that I had the strength more fully to enter into 
the details by which I was enabled first to know God in 
the fullness of His salvation, and- by which I have been 
enabled to maintain that knowledge of Him increasingly 
for more than fifty years. I presume, however, that I have 
written enough to show all who love our Lord Jesus Christ, 
that I enjoy scripturally and indubitably the Divine assurance 
that "I have a house not made with hands, eternal in the 
Heavens" whither I am bound, and where finally I shall 
find everlasting repose. 



N the evening of the 8th of January, 1833, I 
was powerfully convicted of sin, at hearing a 
sermon by the late Rev. Doctor Pitman. I 
continued in a wretched state of mind for 
about six months. My mental sufferings were intense, as 
I seemed to oscillate between hope and despair, in bitter 
anguish. The false supports afforded by Deism gave way, 
yet I feared I was a reprobate, predestined to destruction. 
In the following month of June, I attended a Camp Meet- ' 
ing held near the city of Newark, N. J. Near the close 
of it I was happily converted to God. I had a clear 
witness of justification by faith. My sins were all forgiven 
the scarlet and double-dyed sins of infidelity. 

The forgiveness of sins through faith in the love of 
Jesus mapped the first form of Christian religion on my 
heart. Forgiving mercy gave delightful impressions, while 
I shouted, " Glory to God," with joy unspeakable. Yet 
the forgiveness of sins shaped, stamped and bounded my 
creed ! I am thankful I prized it so highly. I love the 
doctrine yet. It is a precious truth, we cannot live with- 
out. But three months had not elapsed before I felt the 
need of something more than pardon. Remains of the 
carnal mind were disclosed, that forgiveness could not 


reach. My needs, and gospel provisions for them were 
viewed from a new stand-point. Self-examinations, with 
faith in prayer added to scriptural searchings, gave a view 
of more ground to be possessed and cultivated. 

Of my conversion I never had a doubt, because I would 
not backslide. I passed through severe temptations and 
trials. I conversed freely on the subject of Christian 
experience with the people of God. I was of child-like 
simplicity, and wished to hold no secret views or reserved 
opinions. I loved Methodist preachers, and asked them 
many questions. I found, on comparing notes on religious 
experience, that I lacked what some of them possessed, 
abiding faith, with perfect love ! I felt the conscious need 
of a blessing, not included in my past experience. I had 
no theory of what I needed and desired. I felt no guilt 
from transgression. My want, with my faults and infirmi- 
ties did not make me guilty. Somehow, rny nature was 
not yet all subdued by grace. There seemed to be some- 
thing remaining within that I could not trust a vacancy 
not filled ! I was thankful that God would shew me my 
lack ! I prayed that He would make known to me all my 

I loved the institutions and rules of the M. E. Church, 
and attended to all my duties as a member. I began the 
duty of fasting one day in the week that I might reach the 
fullness of my privileges in Christ. I wanted to be usefal 
and in a safe state. I was happy, but that was not enough 
to fully satisfy the desire the Spirit created in me. I 
thirsted and hungered that I might be filled. Justification 
could not increase, and there was no progress in regenera- 
tion. I wanted a form of grace that I could grow in. 
Cleansing power and love, with knowledge of God in 
Christ, I sought. 

One quiet day in autumn, about three months after my 
conversion, late in the afternoon, I wandered away alone 


in deep meditation, until I reached the suburbs of the city. 
It was my fast-day, and as the shades of evening were 
deepening around me, in a lonely spot I knelt down, with a 
solemn vow upon my heart of consecrating my entire being 
to God, for time and eternity. I resolved to continue 
seeking until an answer would be received. 

With concentrated powers and intense desires, unac- 
companied with bodily exercise, I prayed for about thirty 
minutes, when the answer came with the witness of the 
Holy Ghost, and I was free and filled. God's presence 
was with me and in me in awful stillness. I heard 
nothing nor saw anything ; but I felt the heart-pervading 
presence of Divine love. Its purifying power -killed all 
pride, and lust, and envy. I arose and walked home as 
though I moved on wings, Oh, what a precious state of 
mind ! never to be blotted from the tablet of immortal 
memory ! It cast out all tormenting fear. It was a 
distinct and peculiar blessing fitting exactly my need in 
heart and mind, and soul. It had simple and abiding 
faith constantly working ! It was what God in substance 
had for me when He gave me the longing for it, under its 
shadow. It started my thinking anew, giving shapings to 
my views on the phases, and grades experienced, of religious 
truths. I borrowed and read works on the subject, by 
Wesley and Fletcher. My light was increased. 

I am old have been preaching the Gospel for more 
than thirty years but I have never doubted of my 
receiving sanctifying grace, or perfect love, as I have 
stated. The lamented Cookman and Rev. E. S. Janes 
(now Bishop) helped me much in my early experiences. 
Since then I have passed through trials, temptations, and 
afflictions. All my children, six in number, are gone to 
Heaven ! but Christ, in his sanctifying power and 
presence has been my support. I love every part of pure 
religion, but this is central to all. I can not help loving 


holiness, and I must confess that the blood of Jesus Christ 
cleanses me from all sin. Faults and infirmities are the 
inheritance of my probationary life, yet, his words abide in 
me, and I abide in the Vine. I know that I am but a 
weak creature of the dust, but the Holy Spirit is refining 
my nature, and qualifying more and more for the society 
of saints and angels. I love the society of 'the holy here, 
and I believe ah 1 the Bible promises to do for them. This 
blessed theme has helped me much in my preaching, and I 
have rejoiced in seeing some precious fruit. While my life 
lingers along this vale of tears I pray it may be my heart's 
joyful support, and after I go hence to be here no more, 
to have a lot forever among the sanctified. 

" My consecrated soul would stay, 
On Jesus' bosom night and day. 

And drink compassion in ; 
Would live a life of faith in Thee, 
And keep the law of liberty, 

Of liberty from sin. 

Love's pleasing toil shall then be rest, 
Sustained by Thee and in Thee blest 

Shall all be wrought in God ; 
My purpose ever pure and true, 
In all I speak, or think, or do, 

Kept pure in Jesus' blood. 

With white-robed hosts I'll dwell on high, 
And lofty seraphim outvie, 

In praises to the Lamb, 
The harp I'll take of singing lays, 
Reciting odes of endless praise, 

To my Redeemer's name." 



LESSED be God for a free and full salvation 
It is a little over a year since God granted me 
such a view of my heart, that I was brought 
to cry out, " Give me a baptism of the Holy 
Ghost, or I can preach the Gospel no longer." 

Then came the fiercest struggle of my whole life. A 
terrible encounter with the unseen powers of darkness 
followed. But, thanks be unto God, who giveth us the 
victory, through our Lord Jesus Christ, I was enabled to 
lay my soul and body, time, education, and hopes, my 
will, my all, upon that Altar that sanctifieth the gift ; and 
believe that the offering was accepted. 

O ! how those past fifteen years of religious profession, 
and three years of ministerial life seemed to be almost m 
vain. The blessed Jesus became mine in a fuller sense 
than I ever supposed possible in this life. From that hour 
simple faith took hold of Him as a Saviour mighty to save, 
even unto the uttermost. O, this is salvation, indeed! 
What a glorious growth in Christ I might have had, if I 
had received this great salvation before. I shall never cease 
to praise God for this blessed deliverance. 

After I was enabled to trust Jesus as my complete 
Saviour, I was strongly tempted that I had nothing more 
than I had enjoyed before, and that I ought not to speak 
of it as anything special. So I prayed to God to give me 


an experience that I could not doubt, and that the enemy 
even might not gainsay. 

On the 8th of January, 1866, while I was conversing 
with the Presbyterian minister of our place on simple faith, 
the Holy Ghost came upon me in mighty power. I could 
only utter His name, by way of adoration, for a quarter of 
an hour (as my friend told me afterwards), though it did not 
seem half so long ; then I fell upon the floor powerless, 
though not entirely unconscious ; and for more than an 
hour I was so filled with an awful sense of the presence of 
the Holy Ghost, thai i had io p?ay almost continually 
that I might not shrink, but to be willing to receive all 
that God had in store for me, though it should kill me. I 
could hardly bear to hear any thing spoken but the name 
or praises of the Third Person of the adorable Trinity. 

Then came the precious Saviour and supped with me. 
I had never seen Him before as He appeared then. His 
love melted me till I wept aloud. During His visitation, 
also, I was lost to every ibing else. Father and Holy 
Spirit were not thought of. Finally, came a consciousness 
of the Father's lore. Never before did He seem so near, 
so full of infinite love. He hecame my heavenly Parent 
While adoring ana viewing Plim every other object van- 
ished. We communed together. 

So it was; erst, the Spirit, whom I had so nearly 
ignored all my life, whose presence nearly consumed me ; 
then the Son, my all sufficient Saviour ; and, lastly, the 
Father manifested Himself unto me, as He does not unto 
the world. My greatest wonder is, that God should have 
granted so much to me. How can I praise Him suffi- 
ciently I Persecution has waxed hot, and does yet ; but I 
do not care for that, so long as I find a sure retreat 
beneath the wing of the Almighty. I must not now givo 
particulars. But peace, light, and power have been 
granted unto uie richly, from that time to this. 



JN the first day of May, 1853, 1 connected myself. . 
-with the Union M. E. Church of Philadelphia, 
and in a few months was assigned to the charge 
of the class which I at first entered. Sought 

Divine assistance and guidance, walked in the clear light 
of justification, felt the regenerating influence of the Holy 
Ghost ; never had any doubts as to my conversion. The 
Lord blessed me in my efforts as a class-leader, and in a 
year or two I was urged to prepare myself for positions of 
greater usefulness in the Church, and in 1857 entered the 
Philadelphia Conference. My labors were owned of God, 
and during my first year of ministerial work, we rejoiced 
in an addition of over one hundred to the Church. 
Greatly loved the work and labored with diligence and 
zeal, though my mind, at times, was greatly agitated on 
the subject of a deeper work, as described by the fathers of 
Methodism and professed by living witnesses. I felt that 
either these persons were mistaken in regard to the Spirit's 
operations, and the extent of the Gospel salvation in justifi- 
cation, or that there was a work of the Spirit, and an 
experience of the heart, that I had not realized in my 
religious, life. 

I became deeply interested in everything relating tc 


this subject read, studied, listened, and argued much on 
the doctrine ; prayed for direction, but all this with mind 
so prejudiced that I would only receive light that seemed 
to confirm the views I had already embraced. I had come 
to regard the work of regeneration as the completed work 
of sanctification, and that the soul was then entirely holy 
and filled with the Holy Ghost. The arguments so 
commonly urged, " in regard to God doing an imperfect 
work," and many others, were constantly before my mind, 
and every effort was made to meet the claim constantly 
pressed by friends, and as I now believe, by the Holy 
Spirit, and by the remembrance of the solemn vows made 
at my ordination, that I expected to be made perfect in 
love in this life, and was groaning after that experience. 
My life was unsatisfactory ; I could not confidently assert, 
" The blood of Jesus cleanseth me from all sin." I had 
seasons of great joy and love, followed by days of doubt 
and fear. My religious life was largely emotional, hence I 
had nothing settled yesterday, I was on the mountain of 
transfiguration ; to-day, deep in the valley, with clouds and 
darkness surrounding. 

Although I had supposed my mind fully settled on what 
I thought to be scriptural basis for a completed work in 
regeneration, yet I was not at rest. It was often suggested 
that I should plead with God for the blessing of heart 
purity and the fullness of the Spirit, The Father would 
persuade His rebellious child. 

There were many texts from which I dared not preach, 
for although I could form very plausible arguments to 
sustain my theory, yet my heart protested ; my experience 
could not confirm the doctrine as I argued it. 

I felt within the movings of a spirit, which, though 
subdued and held under restraint to a great degree, was 
not in conformity to the Spirit of the blessed Master. I 
could control anger, so that it should not break forth in 

KEY. S. L. GEACET. 187 

violent storm pride swelled the heart in an unconquerable, 
rest-disturbing ambition; self fought against the Christ- 
spirit of humility. 

For years I felt an intense longing of heart for a higher 
life a settled experience ; would seek "more religion," 
and God would bless me with renewed evidences of mercy 
and favor, and yet I was not satisfied ; rest I had not. 
There was appoint clearly defined in the experience of 
others that I had not attained was not fully satisfied that 
I was right in my views, and certain that I was not in my 
experience. I was compelled to admit a higher style of 
religious life, in the example set by those who professed to 
enjoy entire sanctification as a distinct blessing from regen- 
eration, than I beheld in those who with me maintained 
opposite views. Could I have that experience? the con- 
viction came in response to the inquiry, " It is for all who 
are willing to receive it." Instead of unhesitatingly and 
promptly following the leadings of the Holy Spirit, and 
making a full surrender to Jesus, I conferred with flesh and 
blood. What will be the effect? Very humiliating to 
human nature. What will my friends think before whom I 
have so earnestly and publicly espoused the opposite views f 
Then it was suggested that this doctrine was unpopular. 
Now my very hesitancy, for these arid other reasons no 
more worthy, convinced me more fully that I was not-free, 
as I longed to be ; I was in bondage to public opinion. 

Then there stood in my way a needless indulgence, 
which I clung to tenaciously, because of its social charac- 
ter. I now look back with disgust to the enslavement of 
appetite in which I lived for years. It was more despicable 
than the apple of Eden, yet it came to occupy in my heart 
the same relation that the innocent fruit did to our first 
parents a test of obedience. 

I often struggled for complete freedom. When urging 
sinners to give all to Jesus, and the cold and backslidden in 


the church to present themselves a "living sacrifice, wholly 
acceptable unto God," I would myself endeavor to get my 
offering completely on the altar of consecration, that 1 
might be entirely the Lord's. In social and. private prayer, 
when almost on the point of claiming the fulfillment of the 
promises, my innocent gratification would thrust itself in, 
and insist on being seen and heard. I flattered myself 
that I could relinquish the habit at any moment, but that 
it was such a little thing, that I was foolishly sensitive ; 
besides, why should I be so punctilious, where so many 
better and more useful men had allowed themselves the 
same pleasure 1 ? Thus I always presented a "lame," imper- 
fect sacrifice. The Holy Spirit said yield that pleasure ! 
"Be ye clean that bear the vessels of the Lord," "from 
all your filthiness and from all your idols will I cleanse 
you," &c. "With this ray of light falling upon mind and 
heart, my prayers after holiness became like the cold patter 
of the winter's rain. I lived thus for years with a ghoftf. 
in my closet, I was afraid to meet it. 

Yet in ail these years the yearnings of my heart were 
for rest, liberty, a death to sin and a life hid with Christ in 
God, but my proud stubborn will would not yield. My 
mountain peak and dark valley experience did not suit 
me ; I believed there was a better way ; I often sang 

"I cannot rest till pure within, 
Till I am wholly lost in thee." 

[ continued in this unsettled condition until attending, 
with my charge, the camp-meeting at Camden, Delaware, 
when God led me into clearer light, and gave me deep 
convictions of the necessity of a greater work of the Holy 
Spirit in my own heart. By His assisting grace I was 
enabled to make a full surrender to Jesus ; a consecration 
more specific, complete and thorough than I had ever 
previously known. My time, talent, reputation, friends, 

REV. S. L. GBAGEY. 189 

\" \ 

\ i 

pleasures, appetites all, all ! were placed on the altar of 
sacrifice. I desire to state most emphatically that I had 
at this time a sense of God's love, a consciousness of 
acceptance with God and frequent seasons of religious 
enjoyment. I brought "living powers " to Jesus, a soul 
alive unto God, loving and fearing him ; I came to con- 
secrate renewed powers fully to God. 

Presenting myself thus to Him, I had expected the Lord 
would do some great thing in bestowing a baptism of 
unutterable joy; that was the proposed plan, on which I 
expected the Lord to appear. . I held the offering conse- 
crated to God reckoned that it was all His believed 
that He accepted, on the authority of His Word, and yet 
could not be satisfied that my soul was fully cleansed,-until 
I had the distinct, clear witness of the blessed Spirit, that 
it was done. 

I had an abiding conviction that the offering was made 
to God, and that He would give me unmistakable evidence 
of the work being performed. Pie gave me quiet,- rest, 
peace, but not at that tune a baptism of joy as I wanted. 
My faith apprehended Christ in His power, love and will- 
ingness, and I was enabled soon, to rejoice that the Holy 
Ghost was shed abroad in my heart, performing its great 
sanctifying work. My convictions were clear and satisfac- 
tory that the blood of Jesus cleanseth. Since then I have 
enjoyed uninterrupted rest and quiet, with many seasons 
of rapture and glorious displays of God's love and favor. 

My Christian life now seems so settled, so full of love ; 
my communion with God so blessed ; my triumphs over 
temptation so easy: my work so interesting, and the 
salvation that I am permitted to preach so full and " to the 
uttermost," that I seem to have entered upon a new plat- 
form of belief and labor. Every day I repeat the offering, 
living by faith in Jesus. Here my weary heart has at 
last found rest. 



EING- convinced that my experience is a part 
of that all consecrated to God, I now submit it. 
I was converted in 1850 ; entered the mi- 
nistry in 1857; early made myself acquainted 
with the doctrines of the M. E. Church ; read most of our 
authors on " Christian Purity ;" believed in sanctification 
us distinct from regeneration, to be obtained by faith, and 
enjoyed in this life, and at times earnestly sought it. It 
was frequently a subject of pulpit effort, and I generally 
had liberty in trying to preach it. A measure of sadness, 
sometimes of condemnation, has attended my ministry, in 
that I did not know the power of that grace which I thus, 
in all conscience, presented to the people. If it be asked 
why I preached this doctrine, seeing I did not enjoy it, my 
answer is this : " I did not dare to make the measure of 
my experience the measure of that Gospel which I brought 
my people. I could not do other than preach the whole 
counsel of God." 

Thus I continued until coming to my present charge. 
Here, without a verbal profession, some of my people 
believed that I enjoyed sanctification. When I found such 
to be the case, I did not undeceive them, and for two 
reasons : I thought I could do them more good by allowing 
them to think thus ; and, secondly, to preach holiness, and 


not enjoy and live it, seemed to me so utterly inconsistent, 
that I had not moral courage to confess the whole truth. 
The time of the Penns-Grove Camp drew near. I debated 
for a time the propriety of attending the meeting. Should 
I go to the camp ? and could I pass the ordeal "? I desired, 
and yet feared to go. I would avail myself of the religious 
privilege ; but then, would I not by some means be com- 
pelled to confess my spiritual condition, and thus stand 
exposed as a deceiver ? for I could not resist the impression 
that I was acting a great lie. I had hoped to come into 
the experience of sanctification in a private manner, and 
would then profess it ; while the previous struggles, time 
of its reception, etc., would be unknown. 

All efforts to obtain rest of soul in this manner were 
fruitless. My heart became strangely hardened. Thus 
was I up to and during nearly all the camp-week. I went 
to the meeting in some sense as the lamb to slaughter. 
Some unseen power seemed to lead me on, and yet I 
dreaded to go. At the camp I avoided, as much as 
possible, close personal conversations, yet kept myself open 
to convictions. 

As the meeting progressed, my wretchedness increased. 
So far from finding rest, my soul was tempest-tossed, until 
I knew not what to do. Was tempted to do a thousand 
things but the right ! More than once I believed I ought 
to humble myself in the presence of my people, and 
publicly consecrate myself to God. This, for a time, I 
strongly resisted. It seemed to me less dreadful to leave 
the ministry, church, and state. I would fly from my 
conflicts and ministerial responsibilities. Two, if no other, 
reflections prevented this decision. One, the woes of 
Heaven would pursue me ; the other, I could not escape 
from myself. The meeting was drawing-, to a close. 
Friday night had come. My agony increased. I wag 
arrested with the conviction that my eternal well-being 


was now pending ; the great controversy between self and 
God must be ended ; that henceforth I must be icholly the 
Lord's, or I would be wholly God's enemy. 

I had attended a covenant meeting just before evening 
preaching, and from this solemn circle went to the stand 
to hear the evening sermon. Busied with my own 
wretched heart, I heard but little, knew but little, besides 
my own sad reflections. This much, however, God 
assisted me to do, to resolve to do His will when clearly 
revealed, and at whatever cost. The sermon ended, I was 
put to the test. Again I was impressed with the duty of 
public confession and consecration, and again doubted the 
propriety of such a course, seeing I already was understood 
to enjoy that blessing. l>ut now, willing to walk fully with 
God, and being distrustful of self, I sought the counsel of 
one whose intelligence and fervent piety I could not doubt. 
The memory of that brother, hour, decision, and victory, 
is more precious than words ean express. From a private 
tent, and personal conference, I went into the circle ; and 
in the presence of God and of angels, of my brethren and 
others, I publicly humbled myself. Confessing all, sur- 
rendering all for time and eternity, I knelt in prayer. The 
struggle was not long, but severe. The searching One 
saw me humbled, surrendered, consecrated, trustful. The 
promises were applied to my mind with unwonted sweet- 
ness. I saw myself that nothing that I 'am, and God the 
All and in all. Oh, what views of God ! of His presence, 
power, holiness, mercy, love ! He loved me, even me ; 
and so assured was I of that love, it would have been sweet 
to have died then and there. Oh, blessed rest of faith ! 
My " soul dwelt at ease." Having Christ, I had all ; and 
my full heart said, " Lo, I come to do thy will, O God ! " 

I have been somewhat definite ; yet Ihe half who can 
tell ? I have been trying to lift up and keep up a stand- 
ard ; and God, even the Lord God, is my God and Father. 



AM not aware that in my experience there is 
any thing peculiar; and from this circumstance 
it may be of value to thousands of persons 
whose experience has been like my own up to 
the eventful hour of my life. 

. At the age of eighteen, in my native State (New York), 
through the preaching of a devoted servant of God, I made 
a surrender of myself to Christ. For some fourteen years 
subsequently, seven of which as a traveling preacher, my 
course was a variable one. I have no doubt, if I had fol- 
lowed the leadings of the Spirit given to every convert, I 
might speedily have become possessed of full salvation; 
but looking to the waves of untoward circumstance, 
instead of looking to Him who bade me walk upon them, 
I fluctuated in my experience. 

In the winter of 1864, then resident in Wisconsin, God 
set me at perfect liberty. "We had just closed a delightful 
class-meeting, on a Tuesday night, at a private house. 
We were loath to depart. While conversing, incidentally 
the subject of entire sanctin cation came up. The leader 
of the Sunday-noon class, who was present, rather 
abruptly asked me, "Brother P., do you enjoy the blessing 
of a clean heart?" "I do not." "Then you are not 


prepared to preach the Gospel." "As to that, the Lord 
has owned my labors, in some measure, in the conversion 
of sinners, the promotion of Sunday schools, the erection 
of churches, etc. Still, I agree with you, that, without a 
conscious and continual consecration of my whole self to 
God, I am not living up to the full measure of my duty 
and possible usefulness." I inwardly resolved, then and 
there, that, come what would, " Holiness to the Lord " 
should be my motto and experience. 

Notwithstanding I had met with, and been per- 
plexed by counterfeit professors of sanctification, and 
that I might have keener ti'ials, graver responsibilities ; 
my miud was fixed. -As a means to an end, and with 
a vieAV to doing others good, I appointed a prayer- 
meeting, each Friday night, at the parsonage, for the 
promotion of holiness. At the first meeting my soul 
was set free. As the hour of nine o'clock came on, I 
gave opportunity for any to retire; and then shortly 
remarked, that, for one, I felt that I had Satan at a disad- 
vantage ; that the house, for the time being, was my own ; 
that the lights need not be extinguished, or the meeting 

* < o f <j 

dismissed, till victory came ; that I was resolved to wrestle 
and pray till the morning's dawn, but what I would come 
oif triumphant. In supplication, I kept such passages as 
these continually in my mind, " Create in me a clean 
heart, O God!" "If we walk in the light," etc. In an 
hour God gave me the desire of my heart; others also 
claimed Jesus as their uttermost Saviour. 

From that time to the present, I have had many 
serious responsibilities, arduous labors, mental and physical 
sufferings, but a continual consciousness that / ^cas all the 
Lord's; glorious victories; large success in doing good. 
God has given me clearer views of His character ; He has 
enabled me to lay aside habits which, unconsciously to 
myself, abridged my usefulness. I have been continually 

BEV. E. W. PEIECE. 195 

learning much in the way of holiness, as well as how to 
enter it. 

I wish to say, that the secret of whatever success I 
have had in pointing souls to Christ as a complete Saviour 
has been owing, under God, to my insisting upon holiness 
as (1) a definite object of search; something specific: not 
simply "more religion," "more of the Holy Spirit," etc., 
but a specific blessing, and, therefore, that we are to have 
the witness of the fact given to us of God. And (2) to be 
expected NOAV. 

I ardently pray for the time to draw near when 
scriptural life-holiness shall be the accepted belief and 
practical experience in every denominational branch of the 
Christian Church. 

" High on the raging billows borne, 
Or sweetly wafted o'er the deep, 
Alike to us the calm or storm, 
If Israel's guard our watch shall keep. 

And when the ransomed of the Lord 

With singing unto Zion come, 
And every laarp, from every chord, 

Shall sliout the pilgrim's welcome home ; 

S When far beyond tlie billow's roar, 

The liidden rock, the treacherous sand, 
We furl our sails, and hail the shore, 
The verdant shore, of Zion's land, 

Oh ! then we'll sing of dangers past, 
Of toils tliat made our bliss complete, 

That brought our crowns and palms at last 
As trophies at the Saviour's feet." 



HE exclamation of a friend, " May God bless 
you in your struggles after the higher life," 
often recurred to me, but I did not understand 
their full meaning as I now do, nor did I 
'imagine that the "higher life " might be attained without 
a struggle. I only knew that I was thoroughly dissatisfied 
with the lower life, in which I had found only conflicts and 
defeats with little sense of divine fellowship, and that I was 
passing through fiery providential trials, from which I 
longed to escape by death. He whose name is " Wonder- 
ful," " the Counsellor," has led me marvelously in a way 
that I knew not. 

I was invited, about three months ago, by a stranger 
whom I met on a steamboat, to the Tuesday afternoon 
meeting for Holiness. I had not before learned even of its 
existence, and the intimations then given me of its character 
would usually have excited my prejudices. But I went, 
hoping to find there the power of God, and to feel that 
power SOMEHOW lifting my weary soul out of the depths. 
The personal narratives given deeply interested me, and I 
was conscious of a divine presence. When those desiring 
the " full salvation " were requested to rise, I immediately 
did so. Yet all was vague. I was not accustomed to the 

BEV. H. B. ELLIOT. 197 

phrases used, and but dimly understood their meaning; 
but what the speakers seemed in substance to possess, I 
was sure I wanted. That week I obtained books and 
tracts (not controversial but experimental,) and read 
eagerly. I prayed much, and came to a clearer appre- 
hension of what I needed. I earnestly made -a more 
complete dedication of myself to God than I Lad ever 
attempted, ready to sacrifice position, prospects, human 
favor, every thing which had fostered self in the heart, and 
really believed that He accepted it, so that I had actually 
become in an absolute, unreserved sense, his consecrated 
servant. A very solemn conception of my new state and 
relation came over me, subduing my whole being into a 
sort of stillness. The world seemed full of God, and my 
future life stretched jout before me as an exclusively godly 
life, in which self was to have no place. I tried to keep 
close to Him, watched against every thing external or 
tmspiritual, and prayed almost incessantly. I often rode 
in the city cars with my eyes closed, praying, and walked 
the streets looking definitely at nothing, praying. There 
was not much liberty in all this. I was a received and 
favored servant rather than child. The tendency was to 
asceticism. But it was a good discipline to such a creature 
of the senses as I, and my impression is, that I shall always 
need much of the same habit. 

I went to the next meeting, stated in simplicity how 
far I had attained, and asked prayer that I might be led 
further. I very soon saw another point, namely, that not 
only must I be self-dedicated to God and accepted by Him 
for Christ's -sake, but the Lord Jesus himself must and 
would do for me (using my faculties in it) the work of 
keeping my heart and directing me in the paths of holiness 
and usefulness. I therefore committed it entirely to His 
charge, and trusted Him to do it, while I went about, 
undertaking every known duty, relying only on Him for 


guidance and success. This seemed liberty, and I now 
moved as an. adopted child of the Father in the companion- 
ship of His well-beloved Son. The result was a quiet peace 
and confidence, with clear views of truth and great assist- 
ance in preaching. 

There was also a further result of vital importance : I 
have always had strong temptations to evil and an active 
propenseness to it, against which I have wrestled during 
the twenty-one years of my Christian life. In the long 
conflict I had gained nothing, except to partly stand my 
ground, and avoid being vanquished and ruined. I now 
found that, without effort on my own part, I was lifted out 
of the sphere of those evils, and my heart was rectified con- 
cerning them. What had been pressing sources of tempta- 
tion were so no longer, and I was conscious of no pro- 
clivities toward the wrong. All that yet appears required 
of me is to exercise a calm vigilance, and when entice- 
ments are presented, quietly say, " No," and turn immedi- 
ately away ; Jesus does the rest, and I am safe ; though 
if I yield or relax my trust in Him a moment, I begin to 
shake. All that seem to me evil in the movements of my 
mind are certain superficial and minor impulses, or rather, 
disturbances of spirit, occasionally, but as I perceive no 
inclination of the will or the affections towards them, but 
a steady purpose and desire against them, I am disposed 
to consider them infirmities rather than sins, and partly 
attributable to bodily chronic disease and weakness, or the 
long habitudes of temperament. When I can get into more 
regular circumstances, I hope that these also will pass 
away, or by prayer and watching be subdued. My wife's 
distressing sickness (physically distressing, for spiritually 
she has had joy " like a well of water springing up within 
her," and Jesus has claimed her also as all His own) has 
broken up my arrangements of time, and allowed me few 
opportunities for quiet meditation, through the last two 

REV. H. S. ELLIOT. 199 

months, besides exhausting my nervous energy. Perhaps 
this was intended to test my faith. When I can be more 
alone with God and the Bible, I look for more marked 
improvement in the matters to which I have referred. 

This (omitting many details) is about as far as I have 
gone. It is a very gentle experience, very like the dealing 
of that gentle Jesus who does not cry aloud in the streets 
nor break bruised reeds. In my condition of brain he may 
have seen that I could not bear more exciting treatment. 
Of ardent love-emotions, abounding joy, or the sensible 
POWER of the Holy Ghost, I do not yet know much, nor 
of those vivid exercises of the faith-faculty which so exalt 
some souls. As I am able to endure them they may be 
granted me, and I am willing to wait patiently for them. 

In regard to the DOCTRINE of entire sanctification, as I 
now understand it, (not as it is currently misrepresented 
in my own, and some other denominations,) I cordially 
believe it. 

Indeed, it has become a more settled fact of conscious- 
ness, has simplified itself more to my conceptions, and more 


especially rejoiced at this. No portion of what I have 
hitherto held as the cardinal or the logical points of the- 
ology have been invalidated by it. On the contrary, they 
are all made clearer, and my belief in them is strengthened. 
Such an experience seems to me the only legitimate result 
of every feature of the evangelical scheme. It is what was 
designed in the Atonement, hi the grace of justification, in 
the work of the Spirit, in the revelation of the Gospel, in 
the organization of the Church, in the individual call to the 
kingdom. It carries them all out, and COMPLEMENTS them 
honorably to God, while without it they all fall short of an 
issue worthy of Him, and prove certainly a present failure 
a failure to be remedied only by a forced removal of the 
subjects of them to a more favorable sphere. I can not 


believe that on tlie very field where the infinite Lord has 
made His glorious experiment of redemption before the 
universe, He is satisfied to have it appear invariably incom- 
plete, or that such a removal is necessary to its complete- 
ness. I think from the common sentiment that God's only 
resort is, at the instant of death, by some irresistible grace, 
to accomplish what he tried in vain to do during life, in 
each instance under the amazing agencies which the Gospel 
presents. Does this exalt Him in our estimate ? Are we 
bound to accept such a sentiment ? Not with the Bible 
full of commands, exhortations, invitations, promises, and 
prayers to the contrary ; not with the ample arrangements 
of this new dispensation and the unmeasured influences of 
the Holy Ghost to the contrary. I believe that in vastly 
more cases than with our limited observation we have sup- 
posed, Jesus lias already verified His name by " saving His 
people from their sins," and that in the blessed age to 
come, through generation after generation, "His people 
shall be all holy." If that age is to be a millennium of a 
year for a day, according to prophetic style, as some inter- 
preters credibly teach three hundred and sixty-five thou- 
sand years how gloriously will Pie prove the perfectness 
of His work before the eyes of praising angels and men, the 
inhabitants of all spheres, " glorified IN His saints, and 
admired IN all them which believe in that day! " I 
remember with humiliation as a Christian man and a 
teacher of sacred things, my past blindness to this view, 
and look with wonder on brethren around me yet blind. 
The whole Gospel lies before me now like a smiling land- 
scape beneath a noon sun, while hitherto I have seen only 
discordant patches of it through fog-breaks. 

As to personal experience I have a precious sense of 
ENTIRENESS in devotion to God and union with Him, 
though the dwarfing and disabling effect of the past life 
makes the growth and exercise of each particular grace a 

. REV. H. S. ELLIOT. 201 

gradual, fluctuating^ difficult process, for the Lord deals 
with us as free agents, and according to the constituted 
laws of the mind. A chronic invalid may be entirely 
healed, absolutely sound again, and yet for a time the 
action of his faculties be irregular and feeble. A vesse) 
may be entirely emptied of that which is vile, and occupied 
only with what is pure, while the bruised, cracked, soiled 
condition, the effect of former ill-usage, may require the 
gradual work of the skillful potter to repair. I am con- 
scious of deliverance from that mixed, diseased state in 
which motives were conflicting, affections disordered, pur- 
poses contradictory. There is a oneness of direction which 
seems to me now as natural as I thought the former chaos 
was. Certainly it is the normal Christian condition. In 
other respects, there is variation. Enjoyment, freedom, 
fullness, prayerfulness, spiritual insight, are not always the 
same even throughout a day. But the sanctified relation 
(wholly the Lord's and kept by him, as such, apart from 
self-seeking and worldliness) is unchanging, only confirmed 
by trials And I have had trials trials in my church and 
among Christian and ministerial friends; frowns, com- 
plaints, opposition to truth, lack of sympathy and co-opera- 
tion. Yet with these our Lord has gathered around ma 
delightful supports, new friends, new witnesses to the truth, 
new trophies of grace. 

Some speak of hesitation in accepting testimony of 
sanctification, because some appear to contradict it by in- 
consistencies, and at the same time are not so fearful of 
accepting testimony of a "justified state," which is required 
to be more definite in the Methodist church than in ours. 
Certainly " many deceivers have gone abroad, and many 
are deceived." " Satan appears as an angel of light to 
deceive, if it were possible, the very elect." But do we 
not find great numbers also who profess justification, 
equally contradicting that by a life of alienation from 


Christ, who only justifies f Why, then, should we rely 
upon testimony concerning one state and not upon that of 
the other? Is not the fact simply this: that we must- 
receive all human testimony with the caveat of possible 
mistake, and go rather to the scripture of unerring counsel ? 
" The testimony of the Lord is sure, making wise the 
simple." "Let God be true, though every man were a 
liar." If we believe that His word represents a present 
state in which " the whole spirit and soul and body may 
be preserved blameless," why not on the basis of that faith 
seek it confidently for ourselves ? It is in precisely that 
connection we have the promise: "Faithful is He that 
calleth you, who also will do it." "With as much positive- 
ness as we call the sinner to believe unto justification, we 
may call the Christian to believe unto sanctification. 
Moreover, a clear experience upon the former point, I 
think, lays a pressing obligation to attain to the latter. 
Has Jesus revealed himself to one so vividly, given him 
such joy in his love, such evidence of willingness to meet 
an humble, dependent soul, so fully proved himself his 
"righteousness," and ought not such an one to go directly 
on, fulfilling Jesus' own requirement, to make Him also his 
sanctification ? Does he not sin against his acknowledged 
Justifier if he refuses to allow Him to become his Sanctifier? 
Sometimes, perhaps, those who so rejoice in Christ in 
the former relation, if they are also truly walking in Him 
and thoroughly devoted to Him, have really received Him 
in the latter, and have passed into a higher condition of 
fellowship than they recognize for themselves, needing only 
to understand their own case, to be able clearly to declare 
it. The fact that they still condemn themselves for imper- 
fections is no proof that it is not so. I have left much 
unsaid which it would give me pleasure to mention for the 
Master's praise. 



S a minister of the M. E. Church, I intelligently 
and conscientiously held, to its distinguishing 
doctrine of perfect love, or entire sanctification ; 
and, as occasion seemed to require, discoursed 
on the holy theme, under the light of the "Word, the Spirit 
of God, and the authorities of our Church, but without the 
invaluable aid of a Dersonal experience of the blessed 

* About three years ago I went to the Camp-meeting at 
Sing Sing, deeply feeling the imperative need of a far 
larger measure of purity, and power, and peace, than I 
ever -enjoyed, though, beyond all doubt, I had been walk- 
ing within the circle of the divine favor. 

At that sacred place, among my beloved and trusted 
associates, and in the sweet meetings for the promotion of 
holiness, which I attended, I heard one and another speak, 
with meekness, but grateful confidence, of tlie present and 
abiding enjoyment of that great grace of our Lord Jesus 
Christ, whereby they were enabled to live a life of faith 
"when sin had been all destroyed." I knew that my 
Saviour was no respecter of persons; that the riches of 
grace which He freely bestowed upon some of His disciples, 
He would as freely bestow upon others, yea, and upon all, 


if they were as willing and ready to receive ; and, so, I 
asked myself: Are you willing to forsake all. for Christ's 
sake ? to become singular, perhaps, for His sake ? to follow 
Plim wheresoever He may lead ? And I thought my heart 
answered, Yes, Lord, I am willing as Thou wilt help. I 
then set myself to the work of renewed and entire conse- 
cration ; to the seeking after increased moral ability, when 
I felt there was weakness, and saw there were hindrances 
to be removed ; and to the hastening out of " that blessed 
hope of the glorious appearing of the great God, and of 
our Saviour Jesus Christ," in the realm of my own soul, 
as my Saviour even to the uttermost. * 

It was not long before "showers of refreshing"' fell 
from the presence of the Lord. " Refining fire," indeed, 
"went through my heart, 'illuminated my soul,' scattered 
its ' life through every part,' " and, I then fondly believed, 
sanctified me wholly unto God. 

In some of the smaller meetings, where a handful of 
congenial souls were gathered for prayer and narration of 
religious experiences, looking to deep, immediate, mutual 
improvement, I felt as though fervid waves of divine influ- 
ence struck and passed through my entire being, leaving a 
delightful consciousness of moral refinement and elevation. 

It became my practice, at night, after my family had 
retired, to throw open my study window, and kneeling 
down beside it, with my face lifted 'up towards the pure 
sky arid the burning stars, as though they were the eye- 
beams of God, the searcher of hearts, there to wrestle for 
hours, that God's Spirit would help me into a conscious 
and entire surrender of my whole will and being, with 
every thing in any way attached thereto into His hands, 
for evermore, unto whom I intellectually acknowledged, 
I absolutely belonged. And blessed be His holy name for- 
ever. Pie did help me into this consciousness. There did 
come over me the feeling that I was all the Lord's. I could 

REV. J. W. HORNE. 205 

see that the consecration of myself and my all to God was 
now complete. That as Elijah's sacrifice was all sur- 
rounded by the trench and the water, and separated from 
the contiguous land, so my whole spirit was now separated 
from every unholy attachment, and had gone clean over 
into the blessed presence of God. The struggle for perfect 
freedom, from in-lurking corruption, I felt to be over, and 
my soul rested sweetly, completely in Jesus. 

Ever since I have been graciously enabled to keep my 
consecration entirely unto the Lord. Ever and anon, I 
look into my soul to see if all its faculties and powers con- 
sent, unhesitatingly, to God's sovereignty and ownership, 
and find that they do ; and then I look away to Jesus, to 
be sure that He continues to accept and keep almightily 
what He has enabled me to offer, and find that He does ; 
and so my soul is preserved in perfect peace. 

Experience has taught me, that entire sanctification is 
not the whole of Christian perfection, but rather only the 
negative side of it; and many occasions are offered for 
maturity in Christian character and conduct. Instead of 
resting satisfied, for a moment, in any present attainments, 
I feel constantly stimulated to do " this one thing, " forget 
the things which are behind ; reach towards those which 
are before ; and " press towards the mark for the prize of 
my high calling of God in Christ Jesus." I am sure it is 
true, that there has been a growth of grace in me as never 
before. The region of religious experience and attainment 
opens up wondrously before me. The visions of purity 
and the promises of God beckon me on from grace to 
grace. In this land of Beulah, I find flowery spiritual 
valleys, with fountains of living water ; hill sides, balmy 
with the breath of the Lord, and fragrant with His pres- 
ence; mountain tops from which, indeed, are caught 
bright glimpses of the glory dwelling in Emanuel's land ; 
while every where, along the pilgrim's path, are met blessed 


companions, who have washed their robes, and made them 
white in the blood of the Lamb, and are traveling to the 
" Holy city, the New Jerusalem, descending from God out 
of Heaven." 

I find, resulting from this higher and holier religious 
enjoyment, into which it has pleased G-od to call me, " who 
am kr-s than the least of aU saints," 1. A sweeter, pro- 
founder, uninterrupted peace of soul; 2. An increasing 
ability to love the Lord Jesus Christ for what He is in 
Himself His spotless, moral beauty: 3. An increasing 
longing for the salvation of sinners and sanctification of 
believers with corresponding effort ; 4. An increasing 
readiness in preparing to lead the services of the sanctuary, 
with relish for the discharge of all my religious duties, and 
boldness and power in declaring " the counsel of God ;" 
5. An increasing, delightful consciousness of inward purity. 
My whole soul feels filled as with " a soft, white light," 
which seems to bathe it, and is so pleasantly reflected on all 
outward objects, and I have the growing assurance that 

" I shall summer high in bliss, 
Upon the hills of God." 

No stranger am I, in these times, to the consciousness 
of perfect harmony with the whole unfallen, unstained, or 
renewed, and restored universe, whether physical or 
moral. I often seem to touch it, at every point; sink 
down into it, mingle with it, and do feel 

" I cannot half express 
Yet \A'ould not all conceal." 

In these blissful moments I freely anticipate "what 
shall be " in the heirship of God, and joint-heirship with 
Christ, when " all things " shall be ours : " Paul, Apollos, 
Cephas, the world, life, death, things present, things to 
come," all shall be ours, for we are Christ's, and Christ *a 
God's ! Hallelujah to God and the Lamb ! 



AM now trying to preach, the gospel of the Son 
of God, and am very thankful for the privilege. 
I was converted in January, 1852, and began 
to preach about a year afterward. My con- 
version was very satisfactory, not a doubt being left upon 
my mind; and, though I have been tempted to doubt 
many things since, the enemy has never tempted me that I 
was not converted. 

From my earliest religious experience, I believed in the 
doctrine of entire sanctification ; it seemed most reasonable, 
and during four years as a local preacher, and for half a 
year as an itinerant, before I enjoyed it, I preached the 
doctrine of holiness, occasionally at least ; and as I look 
over the skeletons of those sermons, I discover no departure 
from "Wesley in theology, though I do not know that they 
produced much fruit. 

All this time I enjoyed daily the witness of the Spirit 
that I was a child of God, and tried to keep myself 
" unspotted from the world." I had many precious seasons, 
and, I think, always felt that the enjoyments of religion 
were an ample compensation for all that I had lost in 
giving up the world ; but I did not enjoy the blessing of 


perfect love. I was much interested about it at times, but 
would allow other religious questions to push it aside. 

At a camp-meeting at Titusville, N. J., in August,. 
1847, I was, on Tuesday evening about six o'clock, suddenly 
awakened again to the vast importance of being entirely 
holy. In company with another minister of this (N. J.) 
Conference, I knelt in a secluded spot in the grove, and 
prayed for a pure heart. This prayer was on. my lips and 
in my heart : 

" Wash me, and make me thus tliine own ; 

Wasli me, and mine tliou art : 
Wasli rue, but not my feet alone, 
My hands, my head, my heart." 

I believed in Jesus ; and, in about half an hour, I felt 
that the work was done. I preached the next morning, 
and remember now, and shall ever remember, the sweet, 
unspeakable peace that filled my soul. I went home full 
of it. I remember, when I went to look after my horse, I 
spoke to him in my usual way, and immediately asked 
myself, "Is that the tone of perfect love?" It seemed to 
me that perfect love should not only dwell in the heart, but 
be heard in the voice, be seen in the look, soften every 
gesture, and beautify every act. He who is in the enjoy- 
ment of the highest order of holiness held out to man, 
should oftener speak in. the persuasive tone of love, than 
in the commanding voice of justice. It is now nearly ten 
years since I received this grace. I have had to tvatch 
and pray much to retain it, and watch as much as pray ; 
but Jesus's blood has been all-availing the last ten years, v 
and will to the end. 

It i's apparent to me that I might easily get sour. In 
this age of pride and worldly display in the Church, and 
no less in the pulpit than in the pew ; but I must not. 
Perfect love keeps sweet to sweeten others. I feel, too, 

REV. S. V. LA WHENCE. 209 

that I might easily drift with the Church in the worldly 
current. To the insidious- fallacies about refinements in 
church architecture, refinement in the dress of Christians, 
refinement in preaching, &c., I might easily yield, especially 
when urged from such high places, in the name of progress ; 
but I must not. Perfect love lives only in the bosom of 
simplicity ; for, according to the example of Christ and the 
apostles, true religion is severe in simplicity. 

The precious Saviour blesses me in preaching this 
doctrine. I find many, very many, who hear this pure 
gospel " gladly," and are rising up to stand as monuments 
of Jesus' power to save from all sin. And yet I find that 
every new success in the blessed work imposes the necessity 
of a fresh baptism of holy fire to keep me down in my 
place at the foot of the cross. 

I am content to go through life in an humble pathway, 
if I may enjoy this perfect peace. Will the faithful pray 
that I may be kept in this blessed state, and that God will 
help me lead many others into this pleasant pathway? 
There is to be a great " review " ere long, and I have a 
desire to lead a white-robed band before the CAPTAIN of 
our salvation. 

Kise ! clothed in strength, assert thy right, 
Thou of the first born sons of light, 
Christ is thy strength, and in His might 
Go forth and His salvation see ! 

O I great shall thy rejoicings he ; 
Ceaseless, thy boasts of victory, 
Till thou thy King in glory see, 

Through whom thou wast omnipotent. 



Y early religious training was in the Baptist 
Church. The doctrine of Christian perfection 
was first presented to my notice, clothed in 
derision. After my conversion, and reception 
La the M. E. Church, for four years my progress was, after 
the fashion of the Israelites, going round and round the moun- 
tain, rather than going up to possess the good land, 
sinning and repenting alternately. At the close of a series 
of meetings held on Augusta charge, Detroit Conference, 
by that veteran of the Cross, Rev. K. Klumph, in his admoni- 
tions he exhorted them to "resolve, by the grace of God, 
that they had committed the last sin they ever would 
commit." There was a novelty in the expression that 
arrested my attention. 

I retired to meditate. Is sin necessary to our earthly 
existence? I surveyed Calvary, and dared not limit the 
Holy One of Israel. Hitherto I had looked out upon the 
beauty of my King ; now by the same light I explored the 
caverns of my own soul. I saw the alarming discrepancy 
between my experience, and God's demands. I locked 
my closet-door to fast and pray, determined to make 
thorough work of exterminating inbred foes. I did not 
pause to ask, "Have others proceeded me? and can they 

EEV. JR. H. CBANE. 211 

guide me?" I seized prayer as my sword, declared war, 
and rushed into the contest. My strokes but aroused my 
legion foes : they darkened the air ; they wounded me on 
every side. 

For weary hours I struggled on, sometimes almost 
unarmed, sometimes almost ready to admit that my sins 
were stronger than mercy. I thought of the derided 
terms, " Christian perfection," " entire sanctification," 
"holiness," &c.; and now began to pray for these blessings, 
entirely ignorant of what they implied ; consequently, not 
knowing what to expect, should the Lord answer my 
prayers. At last I sank down in despair, conscious that 
my weapon, prayer, in which I had trusted, but rebounded 
and wounded me at every thrust. I reasoned, " The way 
is dark ; I cannot see through : my foes are powerful ; I 
cannot overcome them. Jesus is the sinner's friend : I'll 
cease my vain struggling ; I'll tell Him that I would slay 
all my foes, but cannot ; I'll rest the case in His hands." 

A few moments elapsed ; when Jesus, at whose feet I 
was sitting, rose, and came into my soul. It seemed as 
though heaven was compressed, and thrust into my 
expanding, bursting heart. Then my entire being seemed 
to be filled with, and surrounded by, not merely the love of 
Jesus, of which I had previously tasted, but His very presence. 

Some time was passed before I connected this- visita- 
tion with my struggles. I reasoned, " Yes, this is entire 
sanctification ; or, if it is not, I do not care for it. I have 
a complete Saviour : there can be nothing more in the 
universe. Yes, this is holiness ; for I am wholly lost in Jesus." 

There is no sin in me now; for Jesus is in every part. 
I am wholly His. A few hours ago, had one asked me, 
"What is Christian perfection?" I could not have given 
an intelligent reply. Now I know it is Jesus ; more of 
Jesus ; Jesus filling us with His Spirit, possessing us wholly. 



the praise of Jesus I will give a short testimony 
of the manner in which I received "the gift of 
power by faith." I believe I have received the 
baptism of the Holy Ghost. A brief survey 
of God's dealings with me from the first, may be necessary 
to a full view of the manner in which I have been led into 
this inestimable blessing. Dedicated prayerfully to God, 
and to the work of the ministry in infancy, by a devoted 
Christian mother, who fled away, in great triumph, to her 
home above, on a Sabbath morning, before I was three 
years old, I was left to grow up almost wholly without 
religious training. I was powerfully awakened at the age 
of eighteen, while attending a series of evening meetings, 
held by the various evangelical denominations in a country 
school-house. Repeatedly I went to the altar with many 
tears and cries for salvation, but never felt the deep turpi 
tude of my sins till I had prayed many times in secret ; 
then, while laboring in a field alone, God met me, and gave 
me such horrible views of my sins, that I was seized with 
the most wretched despair. "While crying on my knees 
for mercy, in that lonely field, and feeling that God could 
not forgive so great a sinner, I thought of Jesus Christ as 
a Saviour, and suddenly my great burden of soul was 

REV. W. 8. TITUS. 213 

gone and I arose and rejoiced greatly in God. The whole 
world seemed full of His glory, especially the . sun, shining 
in meridian splendor, seemed an image of my God. In 
looking back on my terrible agonies and anguish, I have 
often felt I had a foretaste of the cup of the damned. I 
prayed for powerful convictions of sin, and God sent an 
overwhelming flood upon me. I would all could see sin as 
I saw it. God forgave me, but I have never been able to 
forgive myself. The remembrance of my sins are still 
most grevious unto me. For two years I doubted my 
conversion, on account of my former great wickedness. 
"With much prayer these doubts were made to disappeai', 
while I was a student in the Hamilton Literary and Theo- 
logical Seminary. 

A few years afterwards I was led, to believe in the 
doctrine of entire sanctiftcation, while listening to a 
local preacher. I then sought most earnestly and success- 
fully for this work in my heart, as a qualifi cation for 
usefulness and heaven. I was a licentiate in the Baptist 
Church, and supplying two small churches at this time, 
when God sanctified my soul. The work seemed clear iu 
its fruits, the change as great, or greater than at conversion, 
though I was a living Christian before. I felt I had a new 
Bible, new power in preaching and I must have a home 
with the heavenly believers of this doctrine. My Baptist 
brethren opposed my preaching the doctrine, regarding me 
as fanatical. I joined the M. E. Church, and for nearly 
two years enjoyed this higher life. A deliberately written 
form of entire consecration, often used, was of great assis 
tance in my efforts to reckon myself all the Lord's. I after- 
wards spent a part of two years at Union College, and 
nearly three in Union Theological Seminary, New York. 
Helving in a good degree for my support on my 
own exertions, I was always hurried, and often neglected 
the thorough care of my soul, while strenuously seeking to 


' a 

store my mind with knowledge. The last year's course in 
college, and the first in the seminary, were crowded into 
one year. While in the seminary I was enabled to regain 
the lost witness of my entire acceptance, through the 
precious personal influence of Dr. and Mrs. Palmer. I felt 
then willing to do any work God had for me, even the 
hardest, and offered myself to our Mission Board for the 
foreign field. Was accepted for China, but was providen- 
tially hindered from entering on a work my heart was 
much set upon. For some years subsequently I enjoyed 
only a part of the time this fullness. The greatest hind- 
rance and cause of doubt, was a reluctance to its profession. 
While at Lowville, my last charge, a weekly meeting at 
the parsonage, for the promotion of entire holiness, greatly 
strengthened me. At the Rodman Camp-Meeting, in Aug- 
ust, 1866, the witness of entire holiness was very clearly 
renewed to me, and great liberty in preaching it afterwards. 
Still I shrank from a full confession in public. A little 
band of lovers of entire holiness, on the adjacent Martins- 
burgh charge, were a great blessing to me, and I hope I 
was also a blessing to them. A few on my own charge 
seemed in love with this blessed doctrine. . I came to 
Wolcott, my present charge, longing to be wholly lost in 
the will of God. I was greatly troubled in view of my 
lack of that baptism of power which I knew the Holy 
Spirit alone could confer. I had for a few months atten- 
tively read Wesley's sermons for my own spiritual good. 
My soul grew desperate ; 1 felt I could hardly live longer 
without a great baptism of fire and power. 

On the 25th of August, having started for the Hannibal 
Camp-Meeting, I was prostrated with erysipelas, in a 
malignant form, but my soul still agonized for the baptism 
of the Holy Spirit. On the morning of the 31st of August, 
while many others, and the people at the Hannibal Camp- 
Meeting, also, were engaged in special prayer for me, the 

EEV. W. S. TITUS. 215 

long desired baptism of the Spirit came sensibly upon me, 
in such an overwhelming manner that it seems I never can 
doubt again. My wife, engaged at work in another room, 
felt the same influence at the time. This was especially a 
baptism of love. My fears were gone, my soul exulted 
in perfect triumph. My physical sufferings increased, life 
was despaired of, will was made, presents given, and my 
funeral and burial arrangements were completed. For days 
reason fled from its throne but not my confidence in the 
Saviour. When reason came again and health revived, 
my recovery seemed to me and to others to be miraculous. 
I thought my tribulations and loss of flesh were that God 
might give me all things new. The promises of the 
G aspel now fed and feasted me. Our hymns, especially 
the 538th and 498th, were all the time wafting my soul 
heavenward. I felt conscious of being sealed by the Holy 
Ghost, and of possessing an earnest of my heavenly inher- 
itance. I loved all God's people with indescribable delight. 
I felt all ambition but to be useful was gone. My 
spirit of hurrying, too, was gone. I now ceased that self- 
tormenting scrutiny into motives, that looking back on the 
imperfections of my labors, had been such a snare to 
me ; all anxiety about the future, all-over anxiety about 
even the cause of God, and felt that I continually gave all, 
and received all. My peace became as the river, and so it 
continued. After having suffered awhile, God has wonder- 
fully established, strengthened, and settled me. I no 
longer hoped I was wholly sanctified, I knew it ; I know it 
still. Bless the Lord ! The blood of Jesus, that cleanseth 
perfectly ; the baptism of the Spirit, that confers power 
over all evil, and causeth us to glory in tribulations, I 
know has come upon me, and I shall boldly declare it. I 
have lost too much to keep silence longer. The whole 
work of Christ, all the offices of the Spirit, yea the whole 
realm of truth has a new and ineffable charm to me. I 


now see Pentecost to be God's pattern of blessing. I felt 
and believed God was no respecter of persons, the power 
that came on Benjamin Abbott, William Tennant, Mrs. 
President Edwards, and so many of our fathers of Meth- 
odism, was for me, and now I know this in my own heart, 
to the everlasting praise of a most gracious God. Now I 
feel all contentment, all peace, all love, all humility. Am 
ready to do anything, be anything, live long or for a few 
days, labor anywhere, and bear all manner of reproach, if 
only I may remain a habitation of God through the. Spirit. 
I suffered during my illness, what seemed as many 
deaths, but I can never be grateful enough for all this, as 
it cast me entirely on God. I yearned much for others to 
feel the same baptism, and it seemed to me that many 
ministers, especially, were coming into this full liberty of 
the Gospel. The effect of this baptism on my soul I can 
never fully describe. Bunyan's Beulah was now mine. 
The sunlight seemed lite molten gold, every flower and 
leaf, and song of birds, yea, all objects around me, 
were full of the glory of God. Payson's river of pleasure, 
on which his departing spirit seemed to float, was mine 
that river of peace I still enjoy. My doubts and fears 
have fled away. Difficult spiritual pi'oblems are now 
solved. A glorious revolution has been wrought in my 
feeling in regard to life's great aims. I must now live 
only to declare Christ's power to save, to save now and 
save to the uttermost. All the Christian graces have been 
anew tested in a fiery manner ; still I have the victory. I 
am all the Lord's, and only desire to be more and more 
filled Avith all the fullness of God. " God hath not given us 
the spirit of fear, but of power and of love, and of a sound 
mind." May this power, love, and soundness, speedily be 
obtained by our whole Zion, a fit qualification for hei 
world-wide mission in this gainsaying, skeptical age. 



Y oldest brother, long since glorified, was mainly 
instrumental in bringing me into the Christian 
fold, when I was twenty years of age. At the 
very outset, my attention was directed to the 
subject of Christian perfection, and thenceforward I felt an 
intense desire for its experience. Two years afterwards I 
was thrust out into the itinerant ministry, when I felt the 
need of it, if possible, more than ever. And during my 
first six months in the ministry I was enabled "to believe 
and enter in." Yet I had not learned to live by faith 
alone ; and when, after a time, I was called to traverse 
one of those barren tracts, so common in my pilgrimage, 
faith, unsustained by feeling, gave way. I lost first the 
witness of the blessing, and then the blessing itself. 

Ever afterwards I mourned the loss with great bitter- 
ness, but did not, for many years, set myself resolutely to 
recover my ground. Often, when preaching on the sub- 
ject, my heart would glow with something so like the old 
fire, that for a little time it would seem as if I was again 
hi possession of my lost treasure. Seldom did I reprove 
sinners for neglecting Christ, or encourage the penitent to 
trust Him How for salvation, without feeling that my 
repropfs and exhortations were as applicable to myself as 


those to whom they were directed. Sometimes, however, 
my discouragement was so great, that I almost doubted 
the reality of such an experience. 

My thirteenth year in the ministry commenced very 
much as those preceding had done. But soon afterwards, 
near the close of 1845, I read, in the Christian Advocate 
and Journal, a stirring appeal on the subject of holiness in 
the ministry. To me it was a word in season. I read it, 
thought upon it, and the Holy Spirit applied it. I was 
deeply convicted convicted that my experience was sadly 
defective ; that I was suffering heavy loss in consequence, 
loss which I could by no means afford ; that I was 
defrauding the Church, and Christ, the head of the 
Church, by neglecting an essential qualification for my 
work ; and that, in this neglect, I was utterly inexcusable. 

The resolution was at once formed, that, by God's 
help. I would be guilty of this criminal neglect no longer. 
I knelt right down before God, and sought pardon for the 
past, and then solemnly presented myself " a living sacri- 
fice unto God, through Jesus Christ." It was one of the 
most solemn transactions of my life. I realized its full 
import, and entered into it in view of all its consequences. 
I felt that, though no human eye saw me, no human ear 
heard, no human hand registered the vows uttered, yet 
there were eyes that saw, ears that heard, and a hand 
that recorded. And in view of all, the vow of consecra- 
tion was deliberately, voluntarily, resolutely taken. 

Yet it was not done without a struggle. There was 
strong and persistent opposition to it, on the part of the 
"flesh," to say nothing of other forces. There was a dis- 
position to make some exceptions in the consecration ; to 
spare some little idols ; avoid some crosses, some self- 
denials. There was a disposition to insert some conditions; 
not such as Gocl offers, and to which I was authorized to 
hold Him, but such as I might suggest. There was also a 


disposition to make a consecration of limited duration ^ not 
final, not perpetual, not irrevocable. Almost any thing 
would be accepted that did not at once, and forever, cut 
off all " provision for the flesh." 

Some of these suggestions assumed definite form, 
though they were mostly presented in so covert a manner 
as not to attract attention at the time. But they were 
strongly urged, nevertheless, and some of them would 
have been successfully urged, had not 

" Jesus, Himself, the stronger sliow'd, 
And claimed me for His own." 

With a strength of purpose which, I am sure, was from 
Tlim who "givethmore grace," overcoming grace, I made 
the consecration made it without reservation, without 
condition, without limitation. I made it in humble reli- 
ance upon His grace to help me, His mercy to pardon my 
failures, and His blood to cleanse me. 

And now, having placed myself in His hands, I humbly, 
reverently, yet resolutely, held Him to His promise. The 
act of consecration is, sometimes, described as an aban- 
donment of one's self into the hands of God. But I cannot 
so regard it. I am sure that I did not abandon, but 
intrusted myself to Him. He had graciously given His 
promise to save, and that promise was a condition prece- 
dent in the whole transaction. As to the mode of treat- 
ment, the surrender was unconditional, but God had con- 
descended to obligate Himself as to the result. And 
pleading His promise, T said, " I am Thine, save me." 

I had intrusted myself to Plim to be saved from all 
sin, and that He would thus save me, I had no doubt. 
And I felt entirely confident that He would finish the 
work just as soon as I was ready for it. I rejoiced in the 
glorious hope of perfect love ; though not, as yet, in the 
actual possession of it. "I waited patiently for the Lord," 


using, diligently, all available helps; hourly expecting 
deliverance, yet willing that He should choose His own 
time, and employ His own methods. And it pleased Him 
so to deal with me, that eveiy stage of my progress, every 
phase of my experience, was marked with the utmost dis- 

I now went immediately to my people, and told them 
what was done. In the pulpit, in the social meeting, in 
private, and wherever I had suitable opportunity, I con- 
fessed my great want ; preached Christ, a present Saviour 
from all sin, and urged the Church to come with me, and 
prove His great salvation. The eifect was very soon 
manifest in an earnest hungering and thirsting after right- 
eousness. Several experienced the blessing before I did, 
and became my teachers. An extensive revival broke 
out, many sinners were converted, and a goodly company 
raised up to testify that "the blood of Jesus Christ 
cleanseth us from ah 1 sin." 

In the meantime I was passing through a most fearful 
spiritual conflict, or series of conflicts. It may be that my 
former failures, and still more my inveterate unbelief, ren- 
dered necessary a somewhat unusual severity of treatment. 
It sometimes seemed as if the powers of darkness were all 
let loose upon me, "sworn to destroy." Yet the great 
struggle was against the foe within. All the latent evils 
of my nature evils that I had supposed long since sub- 
dued, if not utterly destroyed, seemed to start all at once 
into full activity. I had prayed the Lord to give me a 
sight of my own heart, that I might know the extent and 
malignity of the disease, but had no idea the prayer was 
to be answered in this way. 

Instead of looking in upon my heart, and seeing inbred 
sin, as I would look upon a disgusting ulcer, objectively, I 
felt sin felt it in the form of sinful impulses, tending to 
develop into sinful tempers, words, and acts. And it was 


often with the utmost difficulty that I could check this 
tendency that I could so control these impulses as to 
avoid actual sin. And this continued almost to the very 
last. However it may be in the experience of others, 
certain it is, that, in my case, the "old man" did not 
waste imperceptibly away, nor die exhausted and worn 
out by lingering disease. It was a violent death a 
crucifixion and the death struggle was terrible indeed. 

Yet during all this time I was enabled to " both hope, 
and quietly wait for the salvation of the Lord." Not for 
one moment did I draw back from the engagement, nor 
regret the step I had taken. In seasons of deepest 
distress I would not for worlds, it seems to me, have been 
placed back where I was before. "The vow was past 
beyond repeal " beyond all desire for its repeal. I had 
counted the cost, and knew it to bs comparatively trifling. 
I felt all the time delightfully assured that whatever the 
cost, the transaction was wholly in my own interest, that 
every thing I might suffer was to my own advantage. 

Never but once, I believe, did I feel even a momentary 
discouragement. And that was but for a moment, other- 
wise it seems to me I could not have endured it. Through 
long and weary weeks I had borne the bufFetings of Satan, 
and the agonizing struggles of inbred sin, but now I was 
to endure a trial still more severe. This was the final 
trial to which my faith was to be subjected, and by which 
it was to be freed from all remaining alloy. It was a 
crisis, too, a most important crisis, in the then pending 

It came thus : I was praying, and the Spirit seemed 
helping my infirmities, making intercession in me with 
groanings that could not be uttered. " My longing heart 
was all on fire to be dissolved in love." I really thought 
" the long expected hour " had come, and that God was 
about to " bless ine with His perfect love." "With eager 


expectancy I readied out to receive the blessing but it 
was gone ! The tide of feeling instantly subsided, the 
spirit of prayer left me, and I felt as if being driven back 
to wander again in the wilderness. I looked wistfully 
over to the Canaan of my hopes, which, it seemed, I was 
not permitted to enter. 

The anguish of that moment no language can describe. 
There was a feeling of blank, utter discouragement. 
Several times before, in my past experience, I had come up 
to this point, and right here had always failed. And now 
must I fail here again ? Was this a point beyond which I 
could not, must not go ? Must I drag out the miserable 
remainder of life burdened and polluted with sin ? "Was 
there none to " deliver me from the body of this death ?" 
It was not the temporary disappointment of my hopes 
that I had often borne, and could bear it again. It was 
not that I feared possible apostacy and ruin that did not 
enter my mind. There was no fear of punishment. But, 
sin ! I do not think I ever loathed it so before. And must 
I harbor it in my heart ? Must its polluting presence be 
with me everywhere in all I do, or say, or think, or feel? 
Must I carry it with me to the very close of life ? In an 
agony, I cried out, "Must it be? Oh, God, must it be? 1 

In that instant I received strength to say resolutely, 
No. It need not be, and, God helping me, it shall not be. 
God's word is out, His truth is pledged, and I will trust 
Him, I will believe. Henceforth it shall make no differ- 
ence with my faith whether my feelings are encouraging 
or discouraging. I will believe, not because / feel, but 
because GOD speaks. I saw plainly that He would have 
me trust His word, without additional security that He 
would have all the sand cleared away, and leave only the 
rock for me to build upon. The trial had accomplished 
its mission. 

This was the last severe trial to which I was subjected. 


But I had one more preparatory lesson to learn, one that 
proves of great value to me whenever I have to wait, as is 
often the case, for an answer to prayer. But I hardly 
know how to characterize it. Perhaps Paul meant it, or 
something like it, in the exhortation, "pray without 
ceasing." It is not to bring one's petition repeatedly, but 
to have it continuously before the King. It is to present it 
to Him once for all, never to be withdrawn, not for one 
moment, though He may be often reminded of it, His 
attention called to it, as an unanswered prayer, and, until 
answered, as involving an unfulfilled promise. As I now 
look back upon past experience, I see that I had often 
prayed, and with great earnestness, but not receiving an 
answer, had given up the suit for that time. In this way, 
though I did not intend it, the petition was actually with- 
drawn for the present, to be presented again with the 
hope of better success at some future time. Of course 
God cannot be expected to answer prayers that are not 
before Him. 

On the occasion of which I am about to speak, I had 
been praying for the blessing of a clean heart, and was about 
to cease, as I had done so often. But just then a new light 
shone upon me. It did not startle me as new, indeed I did 
not think of the light, but only the truth which it revealed, 
and the revelation seemed made to the heart rather than 
the intellect. I felt that I need not withdraw my request, 
but might leave it before God to plead on, so to speak, 
" without ceasing." I acted upon the suggestion at once, 
and said, as I had not before, 

" Never "will I remove 

Out of tliy hands my cause ; 
But rest in tliy redeeming love, 
And liang upon tliy cross." 

There was an immediate and entire change in the 


character of my experience. Yet the change came so 
without " observation," that it did not seem sudden. I 
seemed to be elevated to a higher plane, yet so gently that 
I knew it not until it was done to be in permanent com- 
munication with the "throne of grace," without knowing 
when the connection was formed. The tumult had ceased, 
and an indescribable calm had taken possession of my soul. 
The painful sense of inward pollution, that had so long 
oppressed me was gone, and I could discover nothing within 
contrary to perfect love. Those about me observed the 
change, and understood its significance. To me it was 
wonderful, yet it seemed negative rather than positive. 
The house seemed empty and swept, but not garnished. I 
could give no clear account of my spiritual status. In the 
absence of the direct, positive witness of the Spirit, I did 
not dare to say I was saved from all sin ; and yet T did 
not dare to say it was not so. It was not properly a state 
of doubt, hardly of suspense, but rather of calm, trustful 
waiting for further light. It was as when the weaiy, 
tempest-tossed mariner finds shelter in some safe, quiet 
harbor, and before he has quite satisfied himself that it is 
the harbor of his hopes. I needed rest, and for the present, 
at least, had found it. 

For a day or two afterwards I was aware of an expe- 
rience, which I know not how otherwise to describe, than 
as a gradual fining up. It seemed as though my heart had 
been emptied of sin, and was filling up with righteousness. 
My rest was unbroken. I was called to a neighboring 
town to assist for the next two days in a protracted meet- 
ing. Here, in preaching, and in the social meetings, I was 
greatly blessed. I spoke freely of my experience, and felt 
all the time that I was gaining higher ground. The view, 
at times, opened out before me so glorious, so vast, that I 
could hardly refrain from crying out, " O, the ocean ! O, 
the ocean ! " It seemed that nothing but the boundless and 


fathomless ocean could convey any fitting idea of the vast- 
ness and fullness of blessing that was presented before me 

The light continued to increase, so that before reaching 
home I felt delightfully assured that the work of entire 
sanctification was wrought. I felt, too, that, for my own 
sake, for my brethren's sake, and, above all, for Christ's 
sake, I must not delay telling " how great things God had 
done for me." Accordingly, I determined to speak of it 
in the social meeting that was held at night. I was not 
aware of any excitement, but my heart was full, actually 
overflowing with praise. In this spirit I went to the meet- 
ing. But when the time came for me to speak, my feelings 
had changed. The witness of the Spirit seemed to be 
withdrawn, I Avas without joy, almost without feeling. But 
the witness had been clear, and was as yet uncontradicted, 
and I felt that I must not hesitate to give God the glory 
for what he had wrought. 

I felt that this, too, was a crisis, and to falter here was 
to lose the ground already gained. Looking upward for 
light to see the path of duty, and for grace to walk in it, I 
proceeded to testify, that the blood of Jesus Christ had 
cleansed me from all sin ; and gathering strength as I pro- 
ceeded, I testified that it did at that moment cleanse me 
from ah" sin. As I made this declaration, the witness, 
which had been obscured, was restored, and with indes- 
cribable clearness. I seemed to have passed beyond the 
confines of belief, into the region of actual knowledge. 
The evidence, which was clear before, was perfectly over- 
whelming now. I could no more doubt the work than I 
could doubt my own existence. At the same time I found 
myself almost sinking under a weight of glory. I was 
overwhelmed with a flood of glory. It possessed every 
power of my soul. It filled my whole being. The Lord 
whom I sought had suddenly come to His temple, and His 
glory filled the house. 


All that I had suffered in reaching this point of experi- 
ence now seemed as nothing. That for which I had 
agonized through those long and weary weeks, was gained 
at last. I had awaked with my Saviour's likeness, and was 

In reviewing the testimony of this able witness, the 
editor can scarcely forbear adding a few words, by way of 
helping others, who have, alike with this devoted minister, 
struggled for months amid the alternations of hope and 
fear. If he had sooner rested on the bare declaration, " I 
WILL RECEIVE YOU," how much sooner he might have 
entered into rest ! God's "Word is its own evidence. He 
that lelieveth hath the icitness in himself. Our brother 
says, " When the time came for me to speak, my feelings 
Avere changed." But it was well for himself and the cause 
of holiness, that in this instance, he did not make his 
feelings the criterion for his faith. Had his faith changed 
with his feelings, he would have given in a wavering testi- 
mony. But acting on the principle that " God's "Word is 
its own evidence," he was true to the Divine order. With 
the heart he believed, and therefore with the mouth he 
confessed. And how gloriously did God honor his faith 
and show him His salvation. Be it ever remembered thai 
it is not a profession of feeling, but an unwavering profes- 
sion of faith, that God requires. "Let us hold fast the 
profession of our faith without wavering : for He is faith- 
ful that hath promised." 



WAS born in the township of London, Canada 
West, on the sixteenth day of March, 1838. I 
was lorn again of the Holy Ghost in the same 
township, on the twenty-third day of September, 
1854. Oh, the rapture of that moment ! I praised God 
aloud. I feared not the charge of enthusiasm, for I Tcneiv 
that I was a child of God and an heir of Heaven. Not a 
doubt obscured my vision. My evidence of sonship was 
clear as a sunbeam. O, the bliss, the joy, the RAPTURE I 
then felt in communion with the people of God. Can I 
ever forget that moment ? No ; the recollection of it is as 
fresh and vivid to-day as ever. My heart warms within 
me when I look back to the time and place in which I was 
born for immortal bliss. 

For several years prior to my conversion, even in the 
indecision and perplexities of irreligion, my thoughts were 
directed to the pulpit as the arena in which my life should 
be spent. My highest ambition was to make an efficient 
Methodist preacher. And now that the Holy Spirit had 
changed my heart, giving me a new name and a new 
nature, the path of duty was clearly revealed. The 
preaching of the Gospel was the undertaking to which 
every holy influence called me. Conscious of this, I 


placed myself in the way to obtain an education that might, 
to some extent, qualify me for the work ; after which I 
offered myself for the itineracy, and received my first 
appointment in August 1856. I now felt myself fully 
committed to the work of saving souls. I was pledged, not 
only to God, but to my fellow-men, to preach " The un- 
searchable riches of Christ." But O, my youth ! my inex- 
perience ! my weakness ! How deeply I felt the need of 
something which I did not possess. About this time 
Arthur's " Tongue of Fire " fell into my hand, the perusal 
of which led me to cry out 

" 'Tis worse than death my God to love, 
And not my God alone " 

I felt that I could not consistently exhort sinners to love 
God, while a part of my own affections were withheld 
from Him ; that it was as really my duty to love God with 
all the heart, as it was the duty of my neighbor to love 
Him at all. 0, hoAv I longed for " the richer baptism." 

" My longing heart was all on fire 
To be dissolved in love." 

Sometimes I fancied I- could almost claim the blessing ; 
then again darkness obscured my vision. In this fluc- 
tuating state of mind I continued for three years, coming 
sometimes up to the very borders of the land 

" Where fear and sin, and guilt expiiv, 
Cast out by perfect love." 

In this perplexed state of mind I attended three Camp- 
Meetings in the month of September. 1859. At the last of 
the three, held in London township, (the place of my 
nativity,) my soul was in such an agony that I could 
neither preach nor pray with any liberty. There hung 
over me a dark and leaden blackness which seemed as if it 


would crush me into the earth. I longed to go with the 
penitents to the altar of prayer, and seek the blessing of 
" perfect love ;" but the thought that I was a minister, and 
might, by such an act, bring reproach on the cause of 
Christ, deterred, me. I expressed my desires and fears to 

Sister K , whose prompt and wise answer decided my 

course : " Brother" said she, " you will nevsr hurt God's 
cause by getting right yourself! " I also expressed to her 
the fear that I could not keep the blessing. In this 
instance her answer was equally wise and heaven-directed : 
" You have no right to expect grace to keep what you have not 
got. Seek the blessing, and along with it God will give the 
grace to keep it. You NEED THIS BLESSING TO KEEP. YOU." 
Precious words of encouragement ! I went to the altar of 
prayer, and " with strong crying and tears," besought God 
to cleanse my heart from all sin, and Jill it with love divine. 
O, what a struggle ! My heart was hard as a rock, but 
my determination was strong. Around me gathered a 
number of my ministerial brethren, who longed to see me 
enter into rest. Their prayers were ardent, earnest ; their 
faith was strong, bold. The consecration was made. All 
the powers of mind and body were deliberately and volun- 
tarily handed over to God. Then came the promise, 
" We that believe do enter into rest." My struggling soul 
grasped it. ' I stood then on "promise ground;" and as 

Sister R was repeating in prayer the words, "The 

blood of Jesus Christ cleanseth from all sin," I cried out, 
IT DOES CLEANSE ! and in a moment my soul was happy. 

I had not the shadow of a doubt of my entire sancti- 
fication. O, how I realized the presence of the Triune 
God of Holiness. Blessed, hallowed hour ! Victory was 
mine through the blood of the Lamb. This was on the 
evening of Saturday, September 17th, 1859. The next 
morning I was asked to preach, and I took for my text, 
" The very God of peace sanctify you ivholly ; and I pray 


God your whole spirit and soul and tody be preserved blame 
less unto the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ." O, how sweet 
was duty then. How light the cross. The words leaped 
as fire from my lips into the hearts of the congregation ; 
one, and another, and another caught the flame, and soon 
the whole encampment was on fire for God. O, what a 
scene ! Never can I forget it. 

" Heaven came down our souls to greet, 
And glory crowned the mercy seat." 

I returned to my circuit, and established a select meeting 
for seekers of holiness. God gave me favor in the eyes of 
the people. One after another sought and found " the 
gift of power." Soon the circuit was in a revival flame. 
Many were the living witnesses which God raised up to 
testify that " the blood of Jesus Christ cleanseth from all 
sin." I felt myself possessed of the necessary " pioneer 
experience " to lead the followers of Christ out into a large 
place. Every difficulty which arose in the minds of 
anxious inquirers after full salvation, God seemed to give 
wisdom and power to solve. For months I continued in 
this happy frame of mind. My soul seemed to.float in an 
ocean of infinite purity and love. All my ransomed powers 
flowed sweetly in the channel of the Divine requirements. 
My own will was lost in God's will. I seemed borne 
onward in the discharge of duty like the sparless bark 
before the sweeping storm. The light fell around me with 
wondrous splendor. God was glorified by a pure flame of 
love, which is the essential element of His own character 
and felicity. 

But alas ! the darkness came again. I had not learned 
the secret of living by faith : and as soon as the first out- 
burst of joy, which accompanied the witness of full salva- 
tion was over, I doubted. 0, THAT AWFUL DOUBT ! It 
brought with it gloom and sadness. Still I did not entirely 


lose my evidence, nor relapse into my former state of fear 
and despondency. No, God was with me in the valley, 
and occasionally I enjoyed glimpses of " the full assurance 
of faith." In this state I continued to live,, until God, in 
his inscrutable providence, put me into the furnace of 
affliction. As I drew near the gates of death, and heard my 
case pronounced very critical, my thoughts turned inward. 
I examined carefully the state of my heart. The evidence 
of my acceptance with God was clear ; I knew that I was 
His child, but the evidence of "heart-purity" was not 
clear. I lifted my heart to God in earnest supplication. I 
doubted not His ability and willingness to cleanse that 
moment. Tnen came the promise, "The Lord is the 
strength of my heart and my portion forever." Blessed 
assurance ! Thrice blessed portion ! My soul cried out, " It 
is enough ; ' this is all my salvation and all my desire.' " 
The next day my disease had increased so rapidly that I 
felt I could not bear up much longer. I looked to God 
for grace to sustain me in the final struggle. Then came 
the promise clear as light ; distinct as if uttered by some 
unseen visitant, " / shall not die, but live, and declare the 
works of the Lord." From that moment my disease took a 
turn for the better ; I slowly recovered ; and now I am 
able to go forth " and declare the works of the Lord." 

My sojourn in the " Border Land " greatly enriched 
and invigorated my religious experience. I now possess 
an unwavering confidence in the divinity of our holy 
religion. I have tested its power to sustain in the solemn 
prospect of death. And I now believe that He who hath 
called me with this holy calling, will preserve me blame- 
less unto the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ. Wherever 
I go I am determined, by God's help, to preach a, free and 



ORTY-THREE years ago, last December, God, 
for Christ's sake, forgave my sins. Twenty- 
seven years since, I commenced preaching the 
gospel. I labored more than fifteen years 
in great weakness, and had some success in my efforts to 
lead souls to Christ : yet how to lead these on in the divine 
life, was exceedingly difficult to me. 

I knew the gospel proclaimed a free and full salvation. 
And I tried to preach the whole gospel. Often while thus 
doing, it would come back to me, " Get saved yourself, 
then you can save those that hear you." Then T would 
begin to search my heart, and always found an unwilling- 
ness to deny self fully, take the cross daily, and follow Christ. 
In the summer of 1846. while preaching from the words, 
"Be ye therefore perfect, even as your Father which is in 
Heaven is perfect," in the midst of my discourse, the 
power of God rested down upon me. I fell prostrate en 
the floor, and then and there offered a sacrifice acceptable 
to God, and by faith received the virtue of the atonement ; 
cleansing my heart from all sin, and filling me with love, 
perfect love to God and man. I arose, and praised God 
for sanctifying grace. Now selfishness seemed annihilated. 
I could glory in the cross. And, just so far as I have 
observed these first principles, I have walked in the light. 


Eighteen years have passed away since I obtained the 
witness of perfect love. I am now sick, and laid aside 
from labor, yet am holding sweet communion with Jesus, 
my Saviour. I have no anxiety about worldly things, and 
am permitted to see God within and all around me. I 
reckon myself dead, and my life hid with Christ in God. 

blessed Christ ! I Lear Thy loving voice, 
Its tender accents make my soul rejoice, 

Soft and more sweet than summer breezes be, 
Bidding me walk with Thee 
Alone with Thee. 

And now I come ! I come ! My spirit flies 
To meet Thee here, and the bright bending skies 
Are canopied above me while unfettered, free, 
I walk and talk with Thee 

Alone with Thee. 

The way is bright with footprints saints have trod, 
From vale to summit, pressing on to God ; 
And all the shining track unfolds to me 
While close I cling to Thee 

Alone with Thee. 

1 stand on hights, and airs celestial blow, 
In valleys green, where whitest lilies grow, 
While all the land shows fair and bright to me ; 

For I am still with Thee 

Alone with Thee. 

O'er roughest paths my toilsome way I press, 
But joy absorbs all pain and weariness : 
For nearer still Thy shining form I see, 
And it is rest to be 

Alone with Thee. 

Somewhere beyond the hills of beauty rise 
The glorious sun crowned peaks of Paradise, 
King of that lovely land, What bliss to be, 
In fellowship with Thee 

Alone with Thee ! 



ROM being a pleasure-loving. Sabbath-breaking, 
gambling, swearing, drinking, skeptical sinner, 
the grace of God made me a rejoicing heir of 
heaven, and by the witness of His Spirit with 
my spirit, assured me of my adoption into His family. 

Glory be to God ! Of this radical and most satisfac- 
tory change, this new creation, I never have had, and I 
think I never can have doubt. I desire it should be borne 
in mind, I had a clear conversion. 

After conversion I had a soul filled with a burning 
desire to lead others to a knowledge of the truth. I 
joined the Church on probation, in March, 1856, and was 
received into full membership in September of the same 
year. I received an exhorter's license on November 23, 
3 856, and was licensed as a local preacher on the 8th of 
July, 1859. On the 7th of April, 1860, 1 was admitted on 
trial in the Newark Conference, and in the name of the 
Lord Jesus, have tried to do what I could to bring sin- 
ners to the cross. 

The Lord favored me with some success, and sinners 
were converted. At Somerville, N. J., in 18612, a great 
many were saved: but during 1862, I became greatly 
prejudiced against Mrs. Pahuer and her method of pro- 

REV. J. R. DANIELS. 235 

moting the work of scriptural holiness; I did not agree 
with, her in advocating the obtaining of the blessing of 
purity as a second blessing, distinct from the blessing of 
regeneration. In fact, my notions of the subject became 
much confused, and my prejudices deepened. 

In the Spring of 1863 I was sent to Perth Amboy, and 
before leaving the Conference, was informed, very much 
to my dissatisfaction, that there were several Palmerites 
on my charge, and it would be well for me to be somewhat 
careful, and avoid offending such in my ministrations. I 
found several precious souls walking in the clear light of 
full salvation. 

Never were two years spent more, pleasantly with any 
people, than were my two years with the Church at Perth 
Amboy. Prosperity was given; and yet I was greatly 
troubled. My members gave me no rest ; I preached to 
sinners, and prayed for sinners ; yet these sanctified members 
would persist in praying for the entire sanctification of 
their pastor. Though these prayers were not answered 
during my stay upon that charge, yet, I must confess, I 
began to seriously reflect whether I might not be in error, 
and was not falling short of my privilege in the Gospel, 
and failing to measure up to the requirements of this great 

At my next appointment I was not so troubled by the 
sanctified; but One that is greater, the blessed Holy 
Ghost, led me into a thorough examination of myself. I 
now saw, that, though I enjoyed a sense of God's favor, 
there was need of a more thorough work ; there were in 
me the remains of self-will, and pride ; there were needless 
self indulgences ; the use of tobacco now, as never before, 
appeared to me as sin. By the grace of God I was hum- 
bled, and a deeper work of grace wrought in me ; but still 
my old prejudices were clinging to me concerning the 
subject of holiness. 


In February, 1866, I heard that Dr. and Mrs. Palmer 
were laboring in the Central M. E. Church, Newark, 
N. J. Having a desire to hear them for myself, I went 
to Newark for that purpose, and attended meetings on the 
14th and 15th of February, and to the praise of God, I 
must confess, my prejudices were all removed, and I 
returned to my charge a seeker for this precious gift of 
power. I think it was about this time that Rev. Henry 
Belden, (Congregational minister), moved upon my charge, 
occupied a house immediately in front of the parsonage, 
and kindly took part in our weekly prayer-meeting, and 
frequently worshiped with my congregation. Oh! how 
much I now felt my need of a thorough work, and I 
sought it the more earnestly. 

At last, on Sunday, July 29, 1866, after more than 
four months hungering and thirsting for full redemption, I 
preached from Dan. v. 27, "Thou art weighed in the 
balances, and art found wanting." I urged upon my 
people the importance of coming up to the Bible standard 
in our religious experience, and the language of the text 
fell back upon my soul with tremendous power, " Thou art 
weighed in the balances, and art found wanting." 

I could endure it no longer ; I must, at any sacrifice, 
however great, have this whole matter settled. Accord- 
ingly, the next morning I started for the Pennsgrove Camp- 
meeting, giving no reasons to my family for doing this, 
though they knew that for years I had strongly objected to 
meetings of that character. I reached the camp-ground 
on Monday evening. 

And, now, I wish it to be distinctly understood I was 
not a backslider. I rejoiced in God ; the witness of the 
Spirit to my adoption was perfectly satisfactory; I was 
saved from my sins ; I wanted the enduing " with power 
from on high." I attended meetings in those tents where 
the subject of holiness was made a specialty. I sought the 

EEV. J. B. DANIELS. 237 

blessing veiy earnestly ; I bowed at those places prepared 
for seekers ; I thought I made an entire consecration of 
myself to God; I said, "My all to Christ I've given," but 
I had no sense of any experience different from what I had 
enjoyed before. So matters continued till -Wednesday . 
throughout the morning of this day I was unspeakably happy, 
but after dinner I went into the Sharptown tent, and I now 
felt in my heart the old opposition to a distinct profession 
of this precious grace. Could I go back to my charge, 
and speak of this in the public congregation? Could I 
speak of it to my wife ? I thought not. I rose to speak 
of my difficulties in that tent ; I saw the folly of my 
cowardice, and standing there, in addition, to my other 
consecration, I surrendered my will, and at three o'clock, 
as the trumpet was blown for afternoon preaching, on the 
1st of August, 1866, 1 entered upon such an experience as 
I had never realized before. Others may speak of it as 
they choose, but I must humbly confess to the glory of the 
Master, that then and there, I was " wholly sanctified 
throughout, soul, body, and spirit." Hallelujah ! it appears 
to me that, since that hour, though frequently sorely tried, 
I have continually grown in grace, and rejoiced in the 
great salvation. 

After the Pennsgrove meeting, I was permitted to 
attend the Centenary Camp-meeting at Barnsboro, N. J., 
after which I returned to my charge, and my first Sabbath 
at home, after receiving the blessing of purity, was a day 
never to be forgotten. I entered the pulpit with a deep 
sense of God's presence with me ; almost overwhelmed. 
But now I was tried in a peculiar manner ; Brother Belden 
was present, three brethren from leading churches in 
Newark were there, and it was suggested to me that I 
had better defer all" allusion to this great matter till 
another time. Oh no ! I could not do this ; the grace of 
God had not been received in vain. I spoke, and the power 


of God rested upon the congregation; six or eight of 
my people testified to the power of Jesus' blood to 
cleanse from all sin, and at least fifty stood up, and there 
declared their desire for full salvation; this was on the 
19th of August and very soon after, on the 4th of Sep- 
tember, a glorious revival broke out on my charge, which 
lasted till conference, (twenty-three weeks), during which 
time about one hundred and fifty persons sought the Lord, 
over ninety of them joined the churches upon the charge, 
and some entered into the glorious rest of perfect love. 

I was now sent to my present field .of labors, Belvedere, 
1ST. J., and from conference till now, God has favored this 
charge with a most remarkable, powerful, and glorious 
revival of religion. From conference till the Vineland 
meeting the work was confined chiefly to the membership, 
though there were in that time several accessions to the 
Church by probation. 

Bless God for Vineland Camp-meeting! The bower 
of prayer ; especially the meeting in front of the stand 
after Brother Gorham's sermon, a time never to be forgot- 
ten; my soul was baptized again and again with the 
Holy Ghost and the powers from on High. Hallelujah ! 

From Vineland to Morristown meeting ; and here it 
was my privilege to work for, and witness glorious 
triumphs on the side of full redemption. The work of 
sanctification and pardon went on simultaneously. 

From Morristown to Belvedere : wave after wave of 
power now rolled in upon my soul, and also upon my 
congregation, till the morning of September 8th, when the 
Spirit was given in a wonderful manner. That night two 
persons came forward for prayers ; and from that time till 
the present, (more than fourteen weeks), the work has gone 
on; nearly two hundred and fifty persons have knelt at 
the communion rail as penitents, over two hundred have 
been converted, and of these, one hundred and sixty-live 


are now connected with the Church. The work has 
included among its subjects, some of the leading men of 
the place : a judge, a lawyer, an editor, a former tavern- 
keeper, some that were moral, and many that were very 
profane ; fifty-two are heads of families, and in some in- 
stances whole families have been converted. 

To God be all the glory, both now and forever ! and 
may the thousands of our Israel soon be set all on fire with 
the love of God, perfectly shed abroad in their hearts by 
the Holy Ghost given unto them ! 

O, when I saw the blood, 

And looked at Him who shed it, 
My right was seen to peace with. God, 

And I with transport read it. 
And found myself to Him brought nigh. 
And victory became my cry. 

My joy is in the blood, 

The news of which hath told me 
That spotless as the Lamb of God 

My Father can behold me. 
And all my boast is in His name, 
Through whom this full salvation came. 

My hope is in the ^ blood. 
Of being soon in glory, 
And learning with the saved of God 

The fullness of that story, 
. Which made by blood-washed spirit cry, 
And shout aloud for victory. 



N tlie summer of 1844, a Camp Meeting was 
'held near the village where I was pastor, in 
Oneida County, New York. The presiding 
elder was absent, and a great amount of care 
fell on me as the consequence. 

As the meeting progressed, from day to day, some little 
good seemed to be achieved ; but my own hands were so 
tied, and my attention so absorbed with the cares incident 
to it, that I experienced a growing depression of spirit. 

The Sabbath was a day of special perplexity and men- 
tal distress, There were many rude and disorderly persons 
on the ground, and there seemed an utter want of spiritual 
power in the ministry and the church, to control the boist- 
erous elements. A determined and almost desperate effort 
of the committee of order, resulted, however, in driving the 
evil-minded ones from the place, and restoring complete 

When this was accomplished, and I found myself 
relieved of the , anxiety and care that had weighed so 
heavily upon me, I began to feel great pain of heart at 
the reflection that, much as I had toiled to make the meet- 
ing a success, my own soul had scarce received a crumb of 
grace, through all its services, and this was the last night, 

REV. B. W. GOEHAM. 241 

I longed then to be alone with God, and pour out all my 
sorrows before Him. 

In a remote part of the ground was a small tent, in 
which were a number of persons, engaged in. prayer meet- 
ing. I stole quietly in and bowed myself down in prayer. 
It was my aim to be unnoticed, for I felt that no one of 
the company could apprehend my feelings of inward deso- 
lation, or at all appreciate my depth of self-loathing and 
yearning after God. 

I remained kneeling, I suppose, two or three hours, 
and my exercises were throughout much as if there were 
a dialogue being held between my soul and Jesus. As I 
began to utter myself to God, in prayer, I found a sad 
delight in telling him my weaknesses, and failures, and 
sins, and in recognizing the utterness of my native pollu- 
tion, wretchedness, and helplessness. But in this process 
of self-loathing and contrition, I had been almost uncon- 
sciously drawing nigh to God, and ,1 soon came to be 
sensible of the drawings of God's Spirit, in a marked 

Then began a process of distinct and heart-felt surren- 
der, by which I gave up in detail the objects I held dear. 
They seemed to present themselves to me one by one, or in 
classes, and I saw that God required me to hand them 
forth to Him, and divest myself of all feeling of right or 
ownership in them, acknowledging, from the depth of my 
spirit, God sole proprietor of ah 1 . Meantime, all my habits 
of life, all my modes of thought, and all my motives, passed 
in review, under the blazing light that was in my soul ; 
and there was felt, and in the course of the evening 
expressed the utmost readiness and depth of desire to shape 
my whole future life upon the pattern of self-denial and 
cross-bearing fidelity which the Holy Spirit seemed to pre- 
sent before me. 

Thus one point after another was settled ; and, at every 


"Yes," my soul drew consciously nearer and nearer to 
God ; till presently, I found I had nothing more to surren- 
der. I felt a degree of regret that I could give no more, 
and searched all about in quest of another offering, but in 
vain, and I exclaimed, with some disappointment, " Is this 
all?" I had seen the time when I thought I could i'l 
afford to surrender all my great interests into the hands of 
God ; but now that the offering had been laid on the altar, 
I was astonished at the smallness of the gift. " Will God 
regard it 1 " thought I, " that God before whom Lebanon 

O *~t f 

is not sufficient to burn, nor the beasts thereof sufficient 
for a burnt offering ? " 

But now, what more was to be done ? I was fully con- 
scious that all my being was rendered up to God, a living 
sacrifice ; but where were the striking emotional experi- - 
ences that, in the case of so many of my elder brethren, 
had constituted, as I had always inferred from their manner 
of relating it, the one essential fact of their experience of 
full salvation? Nothing of all that absolutely nothing 
appeared in my own case. After a little I said, "What 
next?" and I waited, looking steadfastly to Jesus, that I 
might receive divine light in the manner God should 

While thus waiting, this scripture came to my thought 
and I repeated it : "I beseech you, therefore, brethren, by 
the mercies of God, that ye present your bodies a living 
sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, which is your reason- 
able service." "Do I not thus present myself a sacrifice 
to God?" I asked, and at once replied, "I know I do." 
"If then," said I, further soliloquizing, "it is acceptable, 
will it not be accepted ? " I was consciously strengthened 
by the word of God, thus applied, to hold on in my wait- 
ing and inquiring attitude. 

Next came this, " Then shall ye seek me, and ye shall 
find me when ye search for me with all your heart." I 

REV. B. W. GORHAM. 243 

asked, " Do I not search for God with all my heart ? " and 
answered, "I know I do. No part of my heart is laggard 
in this search, and no truant affection wanders toward a 
counter object." " Ye shall find me" seemed now to bring 
me additional strength to trust and wait before Gocl. 

Finally came this, " Wherefore come out from among 
them, and be ye separate, saith the Lord, and touch not 
the unclean thing, and I will receive you, and will be a 
Father unto you, and ye shall be my sons and daughters, 
saith the Lord Almighty." I asked myself again the test 
question, "Do I thus come out from the world, and from 
whatever there is of the world in the Church, to stand 
alone with Christ and in Christ? " " Yes, I know I do." 
But God says in the text, "I will receive you." "Does 
He receive me or does He not ? " I saw I must answer in 
my heart one way or the other. I said, "I am, indeed, 
unworthy that God should do this great thing for me ; but 
then, He cannot be inconsistent with Himself; He com- 
manded me thus to give myself to Him ; He gave me the 
desire to do it, the light to do it, and the power to do it. 
.So He has wrought in me to will and to do of His own 
good pleasure in this whole matter. "Will He then refuse 
to receive me ? No, He cannot deny Himself." Then I 
began to say very quietly and solemnly, " Thou dost receive 
me ! " I repeated the words many times, simply to honor 
God's faithfulness, and not at all with the view to note 
what result, if any, might come to my emotional nature. 
As I thus continued to say, " Thou dost receive me," I 
became conscious of an increase of strength to assert the 
gracious truth ; but beyond that there was no emotional 
change. I arose at length, and went to my rest, still repeat- 
ing, "Thou dost receive me." 

Just there, so far as emotion was concerned, I remained 
for several weeks. I had no ecstatic joy ; none of the 
raptures of which I had heard so much. I found that I 


had the fact of salvation not yet the joy. A sense of 
weakness, not wholly depressing, continually abode with 
me ; but from the hour the moment, when I dared to say, 
" Thou dost receive me," I was completely saved. 

After about two weeks, during which the Lord taught 
me many valuable lessons touching the exceeding worth of 
purity above joy, so that I came to prize and covet only 
that ; then He was pleased, and has been pleased, from 
tune to tune, ever since, to bestow on His unworthy servant 
most blissful and enrapturing tokens of His love. 

From the date of the experiences here briefly told, to 
the present hour, my interest has been deep and constant 
in the spread of the doctrine and experience of holiness in 
the earth. The flame that was then kindled, burns now 
in my soul, and I know that, whatever there has been in 
my life or ministry of power to honor G-od and save souls, 
is to be attributed to the work wrought that night in my 
soul, and to the repeated baptisms of love and power with 
which God has been pleased to crown my life in the years 
that have followed. 

See yon. rock amidst the ocean, 

How the billows storm and rage ! 
Fearless of tlieir mad commotion, 

Firm it stands from age to age. 

Tempest after tempest rages, 

All their fury is in vain : 
Still it stands," The Rock of Ages," 

ROCK oy AGES, to remain. 



WENTY-FIVE years ago the seventeenth day 
of last February, God forgave my sins ; and, 
applied the direct witness of the Spirit. See 
Rom. viii. 16. My mouth was filled with His 
praise. Though retaining the witness of the Spirit, yet 
being convinced by the word of God (see 1 John i. 9), the 
reading of "The Guide," and Wesley's Plain Account of 
Christian Perfection, that a higher state, or the special bless- 
ing of Christian perfection was required, I was enabled by 
grace to make a special consecration for this particular 
thing. This was but a short time after conversion. About 
seven months had now elapsed ; and I found my way to a 
Camp-Meeting, seeking, and resolved there to seek it, with 
all my heart. The meeting had progressed to Thursday 
evening ; when the sad thought crossed my mind that the 
meeting might close, and I still continue without the bless- 
ing of perfect love. Could I go out into the world desti- 
tute of that of which God was willing now to give ? ISTo. 
Self-desperate (but guided, as I see now, by the Spirit), I 
fell uponmy knees for the last time to decide this question ; 
truly resolved to remain there, and die there, unless I 
should be " cleansed from all unrighteousness." It was an 
eventful moment. After praying for it with all my soul, I 


waited, perhaps, five minutes. Then such a peace as 
passeth all understanding ! Then such a wave of light 
and glory succeeded it ! O, what joy ! My cup was now 
full. I shouted, " Glory to God ! " rose, and stood upon 
my trembling limbs, trembling under the weight of glory. 
Opening my eyes, I saw the faces of those present as the 
faces of angels. . Then, as never before, did the word of 
God appear as the word of God. 

With astonishment to myself, and perhaps many others, 
soon I was called of God to preach. After a long struggle 
I went out and spent fifteen years in the regular itinerant 
work. Some two j^ears since, refusing what seemed to me 
a "starvation circuit," I asked a supernumerary relation in 
the Maine Conference. Soon I began to feel I was in the 
wrong place ; and after another year in a local relation, 
and encumbering myself with earthly things, I resolved to 
become disencumbered as soon as possible, and return to 
the regular work. At times, during the two years, it 
appeared that my misery was complete ; but by a recon- 
secration, and faith perpetuated eveiy hour, I received the 
witness of a clean heart. ' But two years of such suffering 
as this poor heart passed through at times, God grant that 
no one reading this may ever know ! I am floating upon 
His providences, and intend fully to be directed by His 
Spirit henceforth : and of late, though living by a perpet- 
uated consecration and faith, and preaching at ^every 
opportunity, it seems that the last and dearest blessing must 
go; namely, a good name or reputation, dearer to me 
than silver or gold. And I have questioned whether or 
not the worldly prospects of some men must not be crushed 
in order to their usefulness. 

And this morning, while meditating upon my* bed, the 
Spirit suggested the question, "Are you willing that YOUR 
all good name, influence, church relation, and ministerial 
standing forever go, if God permit ? " My soul respon- 


ded, "Yes, Lord; for Thou wast 'despised and rejected 
of men.'" "He was bruised for our iniquities. The 
chastisement of our peace was upon Him, and with His 
stripes we are healed." Yes, it is enough that the servant 
be as his master. The test was severe, and applied about 
half an hour, when I responded, "Lord, if I may be a 
block thrust under the lever, by which the Church may be 
elevated, and more souls converted, though / be crushed 
in the process, Amen ! " Then such a conscious sense of 
the presence of God, aud His love filling my heart, resulted, 
as led me to glorify God with a loud voice. Glory be to 
God ! I love Him with all my heart just noiu, and, I hope, 
with a heart of larger capacity than twenty-five years ago. 
Now it was a special blessing at conversion. It was a 
distinct special blessing at that camp-meeting. It is a special 
and higher blessing this morning, I think ; though they are 
all of the same family and from the same Father. Glory- 
to the Lamb forever ! 

Shut up in God ! O wonderotts love, 
That takes a worthless worm like me, 

Exposed to sin and Satan's power, 
And hides me in divinity. 

Shut up in God ! O blessed peace I 
Now let the tempter do his worst, 

He cannot harm me in the least, 
Unless lie toucli my Saviour first. 



FEEL that it is my duty to add my mite to the 
testimony of that great and growing army who 
are walking in the "King's highway of 

I was powerfully converted to God in February of 
1863, at a protracted meeting held on the "Page-Brook" 
Circuit, Wyoming Conference, conducted by Brother Enes 
Puffer. After a very brief, but severe struggle, while alone 
in the secret place with God, I dedicated myself as never 
before to Him, and inwardly resolved that I would never 
rise from my knees until I Tcnew that God had, for Christ's 
sake, forgiven my sins. I believed, when I made the first 
effort to go to the altar of prayer, that God would save 

After I had arrived at this decision, God's Spirit 
came, and broke my heart all in pieces, showed me 
my life-work, forgave my sins, and filled my soul with 
love and peace. I commenced at once to testify in refer- 
ence to what God had done for me, and to bear my cross 
always and everywhere ; and, as a result, I grew up into 
Christ from the hour of my conversion. 

I do not know that, at that time, a single member of 
that society professed to be " saved from all sin ;" and, up 

BEV. L. M. EDMONDS. 249 

to that time, I knew but little in reference to Methodism, 
and less in reference to this specific blessing. But God 
very soon, by His Spirit, convicted my heart that I needed 
to be entirely sanctified ; and I straightway began to pray 
for it in a general way, not expecting to attain it for a 
long time> say ten or twenty years hence ; and then I ex- 
pected to grow into it. Up to this time I had never heard 
a sermon preached on the subject, and had never heard 
any relate experience, or make a profession of it. Thus I 
continued to live for about five months, when I was per 
suaded (much against my wishes or preferences) to attend 
a camp-meeting held within the bounds of the Wyoming 
Conference. I there heard, for the first time, this doctrine 
set forth explicitly from the pulpit. At the close of one 
of the sermons, Rev. B. W. Gorham urged upon believers 
the duty of entering into this " more perfect way," and 
invited all who would seek it then, as a distinct blessing, to 
present themselves at the altar for prayers. Among others 
I went to the altar, feeling my need, but not expecting to 
receive it then. 

I continued to seek it in a general way until Friday, 
when my agony became more intolerable than when I was 
seeking pardon. This state of things continued until even- 
ing, when I went into a small tent, where one or two 
others, in about the same condition, were seeking the same 
blessing. There I was taught " the way of faith " by those 
who were " walking in the light ;" and, while on my knees 
before God, there, in that little tent, " wrestling " with 
God for a clean heart. He showed me again my life-ivorJc, 
and blasted all my pre-conceived earthly plans. I then 
and there made an entire surrender of all my plans and 
idols, and by faith took Christ to be my full Saviour and 
my fortress forever ; then the blessing came, not in the 
way I had imagined, but with that " silent awe that dares 
not move ;" and Jesus was so near, so precious, and so 


mighty to save ! The evidence to my heart was so defin- 
ite, so tangible, and so conclusive, that Satan has never 
attacked me on that point. 

It is about twelve and a half years since, and I have 
been enabled by divine grace to walk in the light most of 
the time since, with the exception of a few weeks, when I 
was debating the question of duty in reference to entering 
the "regular work " of the ministry. But I praise God 
that the clear light now shines, and my evidence is 
brighter, and my "salvation is nearer than when I 

Te ransomed ones of God, 

Who bear the blood-stained banners, 
And lead the liosts of God's elect 

With, song and glad hosannas. 
Te who are panoplied, 

And girt with, miglity power : 
Who valiantly liave fought and stood 

Till this decisive hour. 

Sing, for the word goes forth, 

"Advance, victorious legions I 
The marshalled might of God's elect 

Shall conquer sin's dark regions, 
Till every land shall shine 

With God's own peace and beauty, 
And every soul become a shrine 

Of holy love and duty." 

O, all ye blood bought throng 

Who bear God's shining banners, 
O, all who sing redemption's song, 

And follow with hosannas ! 
Exultant lift your voice, 

Sing loud the wonderous story, 
Till earth subdued shall learn the strain. 

And hail the King of Glory ! 



HEOUGH the merciful providence of God, I 
was blessed with, a pious mother, who not only 
in infancy and childhood taught me the fear of 
the Lord, but from the hour of my birth, con- 
secrated me, her youngest child, to the Lord, and to the 
Christian ministry. 

Frequent and powerful were the strivings of the Holy 
Spirit with my young and tender heart while a Sabbath - 
school scholar, and when but a child, was brought under 
greater concern about religion, through a visit to my 
native village, and to my father's house, of the late Kev. 
John Smith, the great revivalist. Shortly after his tran- 
sient visit, a great revival commenced in the circuit. I 
sought the Lord earnestly about four weeks, and at a cot- 
tage prayer meeting, was happily converted. 

Being then in the fourteenth year of my age, my joy, on 
receiving the evidence of God's pardoning love, arose 
almost to ecstacy. I shouted aloud the praises of God and 
could truly say, " O Lord, I will praise Thee, though thou 
wast angry with me : thine anger is turned away and Thou 
comfortest me. Behold, God is my salvation ; I will trust 
and not be afraid." I thank God for the clearness with 
which He then manifested His love to me, so ycung and 


inexperienced, it has saved me from many doubts which 
otherwise I might have had as to the fact of my adoption 
into the family of God. I was at once received on proba- 
tion in the Wesleyan Methodist Society, in Sandhurst, 
Kent county, England 

Soon after my conversion, my mind became greatly 
exercised about working for God, and the impression forced 
itself upon my heart that after a few more year's experi- 
ence, I should be called " to preach the glorious Gospel of 
the blessed God." The superintendent of the Sunday- 
school in the village, often prevailed upon me to exhort in 
the school, and when in my seventeenth year, the superin- 
tendent of the Circuit, the Eev. Joseph "Wilson, asked me 
to accompany him to Mountfield. He preached in the 
morning of the Sabbath, and announced that he would 
leave me to address them in the afternoon. It was a very 
humble sanctuary, in one of the most rural parts of the 
County of Sussex. Soon after I began to speak, in the 
name of the Lord, I became deeply convinced of the 
necessity of a deeper work of grace in my heart. From the 
writings of Mr. Wesley, with which I became familiar, I 
saw clearly there was a greater salvation to be attained, 
and about this time Providence favored me with the friend- 
ship and society of a few deeply devoted Christians, one 
of whom presented me with the life of the 1 Eev. W. Bram- 
well. I became athirst for full salvation, and perceived 
clearly from Mr. Bramwell's life and letters, that the way 
to its attainment was by simple faith, in the all-atoning, 
all cleansing blood of the Lamb. To the best of my 
knowledge, I had consecrated my body with all its members, 
and my soul with all its powers, to the Eord, for time and 
eternity ; but I could not be satisfied with this. I per- 
ceived that heart-purity, or the cleansing of the soul from 
all sin', was distinct from, though combined with relative 
consecration, and that it consisted in a greater work 

EEV. DAVID NASff. 253 

wrought in the heart by the Holy Spirit of God, by which 
is produced a moral and spiritual meetness for the inheri- 
tance of the saints in light. 

While seeking this purity of heart, I used to arise about 
four o'clock in the morning, and taking BramwelTs life 
with me, retired to a very secluded spot in Engley Wood, 
near the town of Cranbrook, Kent, and spent about two 
hours in reading and earnest prayer, before commencing 
the labors of the day. 1 became in a greater agony for 
this crowning blessing of the Gospel, than I did when I 
sought the forgiveness of sins, until one Saturday evening, 
having concluded the labors of the week, I went into the 
house of a good old local preacher, whose name was Henry 
Gurr, and found there three Christian friends. We soon 
went to prayer got into a hply agony ; the overwhelming 
power of the Spirit came down, and I was enabled to cast 
my soul, by simple, childlike faith, into the "Fountain that 
is opened for sin and uucleanness." O how mightily we 
wrestled with the Angel of the Covenant. But blessed be 
God, the heart-renewing love was given. Every doubt 
was removed, and the word of God, spoken by the Prophet 
Zephaniah, being powerfully applied to the mind, confirmed 
the blessing " The Lord hath taken away thy judgement. 
He hath cast out thine enemy. The Bang of Israel, even 
the Lord is in the midst of thee, thou shalt not see evil 
any more." Oh! this seemed a love sufficient to over- 
whelm the saints in light. I could do nothing, but, in the 
spirit of rapturous awe, give glory to God. After this, I 
felt a heavenly calm within. " The work of righteousness 
was peace, and, the effect of righteousness quietness and 
assurance for ever." The struggling between nature and 
grace, between the flesh and the spirit had ended, and I 
was kept in peace through Jesus' name, supported by His 
smile ; felt emptied of sin and self, and realized what our 
poet meant in the following lines : 


" All the struggle then is o'er 
And wars and fighting cease j 
Israel then shall sin no more, 
But dwell in perfect peace. 
All his enemies are gone ; 
Sin in him shall have no part ; 
Israel then shall dwell alone 
With Jesus in his heart." 

After receiving this deep work of grace, my desires 
increased for usefulness, and felt it a, privilege as well as a 
duty to labor for God and for the salvation of souls. 
Could enter into the feelings of the Psalmist, when he 
said, " Rivers of water run down mine eyes because men 
keep not Thy law." Providence opened various doors of 
usefulness. Upon removing to Beekley, in the Rye Circuit, 
Erigland, I became the leadeof a large class. The Lord 
gave me many souls. The class had to be divided repeat- 
edly, on account of its numbers. We had in these meet- 
ings many seasons of sanctifying power. I was also placed, 
on the local preacher's plan, in three different circuits, 
namely, Rye, Sandhurst, and Tenterden. These were 
days of incessant, but happy toil. Business required my 
personal attention during the week. Many of the Sabbath 
appointments were from ten to sixteen miles from my 
residence, and for some years these journeys had to be 
performed on foot. But these were halcyon days. The 
men in my employ became converted, and often the shop 
resounded with the songs of Zion. Two apprentices and 
one journeyman became preachers of the Gospel, and 
frequently we discussed points of theology and Christian 
experience. Well might Paul say, " God hath chosen the 
weak things of the world to confound the things that are 
mighty, that no flesh should glory in His presence," for 
by so feeble an instrument He often saved from ten to 
fifteen souls at a Sabbath service. 

When the Rev. Thomas Collins was appointed to the 


Sandhurst Circuit, in 1832, he came in the fullness of the 
Gospel of Christ offered the full salvation of God to 
every society. The membership in nearly every place 
began to hunger and thirst for perfect righteousness. The 
Lord poured out His Holy Spirit in a remarkable manner. 
Hundreds of souls were soon converted, and the revival 
spread to all the adjacent circuits. He was a most inti- 
mate friend, and though he was in the itinerant ranks and 
I in the local, yet we labored shoulder to shoulder in this 
blessed work, and God gave us a day of special power. 

Soon after, I became a subject of the saving grace of 
God, while walking with the superintendent of the circuit, 
the Rev. William Kaye, a faithful man of God, who said 
to me, " David, there is one passage of Scripture which I 
hope you will %dhere to all through life: ' In all thy ways 
acknowledge Him, and He will direct thy paths,' " and 
praised be the Lord, this has been my guiding star thus 
far through the pilgrimage of life, and in the year 1850, it 
appeared to direct me to these United States, and after 
much deliberation and prayer, I closed up my business, and 
amidst the tears and affections of a large circle of Mends 
and relatives, bade adieu to the beloved land of my 
fathers, to tell my fellow-sinners here of a Saviour's dying 
love, and to offer to fellow-believers the precious pearl of 
perfect love. God has been with us; He has prepared 
our way. Upon landing in this country of my adoption, I 
was immediately employed by Rev. Heman Bangs on the 
New Haven District ; joined the New York East Con- 
ference in 1851 ; was ordained deacon at the Conference 
in New York in 1853, by Bishop Waugh ; elected to 
elder's orders at the Conference in Danbury in 1855, and 
ordained by Bishop Janes. Revivals to a greater or less 
extent have been witnessed in every place where I have 
been called to labor. , 




N putting on record my humble taetimony to the 
power of redeeming grace, I would state that 
I was converted to God in my eighteenth year. 
Shortly after which I felt impressed with the 
importance of a deeper work of grace, which I sought 
with diligence and earnestness. Having, however, no very 
definite idea of what that work comprehended, and hear- 
ing nothing on the subject, I failed to realize the desire of 
my heart, though I was favored with many seasons of 
precious communion with God. 

I seemed to settle down in the belief that, while it 
might be the privilege of comparatively few, to enter into 
a state of entire sanctification in early life, I could not, 
however, recognize it as mine ; yet there were times when 
I doubted the correctness of this position. When assuming 
the vows of the ministerial office, and often, in preaching 
the Gospel, I felt the need of a baptism of power on my 
soul, but failed to recognize it as a present privilege. 

I sometimes Avould meet with those who, by the purity 
of their lives and sweetness of their experience, led me to 
believe in the superiority of their attainments, and 

REV. J. W. HOOVER. 257 

awakened the desire within me, that I might be able to 
ascend to a higher plane of enjoyment. 

As years passed on, the lively .emotion of joy which 
attended my early experience disappeared, except at 
distant intervals. The light of my justification seemed to 
be waining, so that often I could only see men as trees 

My ministry was not entirely fruitless, but my inner 
spiritual life was by no means satisfactory. 

I felt the need of inward cleansing, by a conviction as 
distinct and strongly marked as when first converted to 
God. But whether this was my present privilege, or 
whether I must wait until some indefinite period in the 
future, were questions of no ordinary interest. That it 
was indeed my present privilege, was the conclusion which 
I finally reached, by the following process : 

It is the Spirit alone which has led me to see and feel 
the necessity of this work. This is presumptive evidence 
that I may receive it. When God gives a sinner to feel 
the necessity of pardon, that itself is proof of His willing- 
ness to pardon. So, also, in relation to the higher attain- 
ments of the divine life, when the Holy Spirit inspires the 
prayer for a clean heart, this may be regarded as evidence 
that He means to answer that prayer and bestow the favor. 

Again, I read the command, " Be ye holy ! " "Be ye 
perfect." " Thou shalt love the Lord thy God, with all thy 
soul and with all thy mind, and with all thy strength." I 
read the promise ; " Then will I sprinkle clean water upon 
you, and ye shall be clean." " Christ loved the Church, 
and gave himself for it, that He might sanctify and cleanse 
it with the washing of water by the word." " The blood 
of Jesus Christ, His Son, cleanseth us from all sin." 

I read the prayer of Jesus, " Sanctify them through 
thy truth ;" and that of the Apostle, " The very God of 
peace sanctify you wholly." 


I see no reason why the things here commanded, 
promised and prayed for, may not be obtained now. I 
surely need it now; there is nothing in the Scripture 
opposed to, but much in favor of, present salvation. " Be- 
hold, now is the accepted time." I, therefore, reach the 
conclusion that it is my present privilege. 

About this time the works of Mrs. Palmer were read 
with great interest, in which I saw almost a life picture of 
my own religious state, and became inspired with a hope 
of exercising that faith which is the shorter way to full 
salvation. I, therefore, resolved, by the grace of God 
assisting me, to be sanctified wholly, and henceforth to 
glorify God in my body and spirit which are His ; and 
accordingly consecrated myself up to the measure of light 
I then had, to His service, for time and eternity. This 
was done with but a small measure of faith, and was fre- 
quently repeated without realizing the results I expected 
to reach ; and yet, I felt a growing interest in the subject 
of heart purity. The terms, " sanctification," "perfection," 
and " holiness," were no longer objectionable ; but, on the 
contrary, they seemed to embody the very substance and 
power of the Gospel, arid often, in reading the blessed 
word, I found nryself lingering over them, and endeavoring 
to extract from them the sweetness of spiritual life. The 
word HOLINESS, especially, seemed vested with an interest I 
cannot describe. I wrote it in large letters on paper, and 
placed it before me in my study, that when I raised my 
eyes I might look upon its beauty, and be admonished by 
the lesson it suggested. 

Failing to realize the answer to my prayer, after 
repeated acts of consecration, .1 was led into deep heart- 
searchings before God, to find the difficulty. I soon 
"became impressed that it was my duty to acknowledge, 
before my people, where I stood, in relation to the Avork 
of holiness. 

REV. J. W. HOOVEE. 259 

This, however, I felt unwilling to do ; it seemed 
extremely humiliating to confess that I had so long been 
living below my privilege, and that I was now definitely 
seeking purity of heart. This I refused to do, for several 
weeks, but finding that this was the cross God laid upon 
me, to humble my pride, I finally concluded to bear it, arid 
availed myself of the first opportunity, making a clean 
breast of the exercises through which I had been passing 
for months, and requested to be remembered in their 
prayers. A great load was at once lifted from my mind, 
and I soon became willing, not only to sit at the feet of 
Jesus, but to receive instruction in the way to holiness, 
from His humblest disciples ; and yet I could not appropri- 
ate the blood which cleanseth. 

The act of faith, which brings full salvation, seemed 
exceedingly difficult, but with the increasing light of the 
Spirit on my mind, and with earnest and imploring 
entreaty for the grace of God to assist me, as under His 
own immediate eye and the witnessing Hosts of Heaven, I . 
gave myself, my family, my property, my time, talents and 
reputation, in a perpetual covenant, to be the Lord's for 
ever, as I had not done before. Every power and energy 
of my being, as described by the poet, seemed to have been 
enlisted in this act. 

" My heart-strings groan with deep complaint, 

My flesli lies panting 1 , Lord for Thee ; 
And eVery limb and every joint 
Stretches for perfect purity." 

With the sacrifice thus placed on the altar, I endeavored 
to trust for its acceptance ; but the power of the enemy 
withstood me at every effort to believe the promise, " I 
will receive you." Instead of sinking down into the 
simplicity, of a little child, and trusting in the cleansing 
blood now, right now, I looked for some great thing to be 


done, but I found I had done my utmost, and I felt sure 
that Jesus must do the rest. In this attitude, with all on 
the divine altar, I seemed to sink down into proportions so 
small that it appeared as though all my former self was 
gone, and all that remained was the consciousness that I 
was the same person, and with this little all of me that 
seemed left, resting on Jesus, I said, apparently approach- 
ing Him, 

Just as I am, tliou dost receive, 

Dost welcome, pardon, cleanse, relieve, 

Because thy promise I believe 

O, Lamb of God, I come. 

" Just as I am, thy love unknown 
Has broken every barrier down ; 
Now to be thine, yea thine alone 
O, Lamb of God, I come. 1 ' 

At this point I entered the Canaan of perfect love, 
-though the transition was so gentle, that I was unable to 
fix the precise time. 

I had expected that God would cleanse me by striking 
His hand " over the place," and with considerable pomp 
and demonstration, I should be exalted to the third 
Heavens ; but there was no great emotion or ecstatic 
rapture, I simply sunk into nothing at the feet of Jesus. 
The great difficulties which for many months environed 
me were strangely removed out of the way, and a deep 
peace settled down on my soul, rendering it as perfectly 
calm and tranquil as a day without a cloud. The evidence 
of the work wrought within did not seem to come by a 
direct witness, so much as examining into the ground of 
my faith, and the fruits of the Spirit in my heart and life. 
I felt satisfied, however, that the work was done. 

Blessed be God " He that doeth my will shall know 
of the doctrine." Since then I can say with the Apostle 

REV. J. W. HOOVEB. 261 

Paul, " The life which I now live in the flesh, I li ve by the 
faith of the Son of God, who hath loved me, and given 
Himself for me." 

At times, like Abraham, I have been called to go out 
into a " strange land," a land of dark and mysterious pro- 
vidences, but faith has been to me, the " evidence of things 
not seen," in many instances, until the objects of divine 
providence have been accomplished. 

I have found, in uttering a direct testimony to the power 
of Jesus' blood to save from all sin, a great benefit to my 
religious life, and in my pastoral work, I have often been 
greatly quickened and blessed in urging this attainment on 
believers. There is, indeed, no subject so dear and precious 
to my heart, as the great theme of present and full salva- 

In preaching the word, I often find myself drawn into 
this subject, when it was iiot my intention to allude to it. 
There is, indeed, no subject so dear and precious to my 
heart, as the great theme of present and full salvation. 
And I never preach specifically on this subject without 
having a good time, and approaching nearer to the 
blessed Christ. 

Since my return from the Vineland Camp-meeting, I 
have witnessed, in my charge, the sanctification of about 
seventy souls, and about the same number of conversions. 

And now, after thirteen years experience of this grace, 
I will say to the glory of God, I realize that the path of 
*.he just is as the shining light that shineth more and more 
to the perfect day. I have never had clearer light or brighter 
skies, than I have enjoyed for months past. 

" Happj, if with my latest breath 

I may but gasp His name ; 
Preach Him to all, and cry, in death 
Behold, behold the Lamb 1" 



HOUG-H I was not favored in early childhood 
with pious parents, yet serious religious impres- 
sions attended me from a period as far back as 
memory extends. These would at times inten- 
sify into pungent convictions of sin and terrible apprehen- 
sions of God's displeasure. Thus I continued, sometimes 
praying in secret, and unsuccessfully resolving to "do 
better," until sixteen years of age, when I was enabled to 
decide the question, and yield my heart to Jesus. 

Soon my mind was called to the subject of Christian holi- 
ness. Much of the interest awakened in my heart on this 
subject is due to the instructions of my class leader, and of 
my faithful pastor, the now sainted Ninde. 

I also derived great confirmation from reading, at a cer- 
tain time, the first chapter of the First Epistle of John, and 
Dr. A. Clarke's comments thereon. After that reading I 
think I never doubted the attainableness of purity of heart. 
At times, thenceforward, I earnestly sought this bless, 
ing. The language of my heart often was, 

" Oh that with all Thy saints I might 

By sweet experience prove 
What is the length, and breadth, and height, 
And depth of perfect love." 

EEV. P. C. BENNET. 263 

After I entered upon my life-work, the Christian minis- 
try, the importance of enjoying the " fullness of the bless- 
ing of the Gospel of Christ," was frequently and deeply 
impressed upon my mind. I clearly saw it was my duty to 
instruct the people in this, as well as other Bible doctrines. 
I tried to do so ; but, alas ! my sermons on this subject 
were little else than doctrinal. O how they lacked that 
light and life, that fire and power which actual experience, 
only, can inspire. 

I never heard of a soul that was awakened to seek this 
glorious fullness under my preaching in those days. Still, as 
then, so now I believe I did my duty as far as I went. 
I had no right to do otherwise than preach a full salvation 

My reason taught me that if the Gospel is an antidote 
to sin at all, it is an antidote to all sin that if Christ can 
save men from sin to any extent He can " save them to 
the uttermost." Any other view made the mediation of 
Christ so meager and inadequate that I could not entertain 
it for a moment. Still, strange enough, my faith traveled 
little beyond this for eight years. 

During the session of the Black Eiver Conference, of 
which I was then a member, in 1846, I became deeply 
impressed with the importance of personal holiness. This 
impression increased as I proceeded to my work. Nor did 
it wear away as formerly. During a Camp-meeting in 
August, near Fulton, New York, my mind was greatly 
exercised thereon. On Saturday, I returned, not satisfied 
that the precious pearl was yet mine, though greatly 
encouraged and strengthened in the search for it. At tea, 
my dear wife, who had not enjoyed the privileges of the 
Camp-meeting, but who, for a long time, had known my 
earnest struggles for full redemption, inquired if I had 
attained this great object of my desire. I replied, " I do 
not know that I have, but I never felt so fully the Lord's 
as now." At this point my feelings became uncontrolable. 


I left the table, repaired to my study, fell on iny knees, 
wept, prayed, tried to take hold on Christ by faith, as my 
Saviour from all sin, but all apparently hi vain. My wife, 
knowing that I had been absent all the week, suggested 
perhaps I had better compose my mind, and make some 
preparations for my Sabbath services. But it seemed to 
me impossible to turn my thoughts hi that direction. The 
language of my heart was, " How can I ever again preach 
the gospel of purity, till that purity is experimentally mine T' 
Night came on a dark and stormy one. All was commo- 
tion within and without. At this point I thought of a 
brother near by, who with me, at the Camp-meeting, was 
a seeker after this priceless treasure, and who, as I sup- 
posed, had found it. I proceeded at once to his residence, 
confident that he could tell me just how to grasp the prize ; 
But what was my surprise and grief to learn, that we both 
were in about the same condition. We wept and prayed 
together, but seemed unable to help each other. I returned, 
and spent much of the night in earnest pleadings for a 
clean heart. Sabbath morning came, and the hour of 
public service. " "What shall I do ? The people expect 
me to lead their devotions, but I have no preparation 
made ! " Yet even this thought did not divert my heart 
from the all-absorbing theme. 

Proceeding to the church, and commencing the services, 
I read Psalms, li. 10 : " Create hi me a clean heart O 
God, and renew a right spirit within me." I could think 
of no other text that I dared venture to read, for present use. 
It was safe to employ this, for it expressed so fully the 
desire of my heart. I commenced to speak, but in spite 
of all effort to suppress the rising tide, niy emotions over- 
powered me. I succeeded in merely telling the people that 
iny tears were not caused by a sense of guilt, for never 
did I feel a clearer assurance of acceptance with God ; 
but that I saw such a distance between myself and Him 

REV. P. G. SENNET. 265 

such a glorious fullness in the provisions of grace, that I 
could not rest till in experience it was mine. 

I proceeded to my next appointment, for I had three 
that day, in as many different places, and announced as my 
text, Hebrew, xii. 14 : " Follow peace with all men and holi- 
ness, without which no man shall see the Lord." I explained 
the nature of the holiness mentioned in the text, with, a 
good degree of liberty, and I think with clearness,, for 
theoretically I was correct, but when I attempted to tell 
how to " follow " pursue it, I was again conquered by 
emotion, and compelled to confess that experimentally J. 
knew not the way. I assured the people of my earnest 
desire on this subject, and that when I obtained it, I would, 
to the best of my ability, tell them all about it. 

Still engrossed with this great theme, I hastened to my 
next appointment, and addressed the people from Rom. vi. 
22: "Now being made free from sin," &c. The discourse 
ended for this time I maintained the mastery of my feel- 
ings and the labors of the day ended, I was yet in deep 
agony of spirit for the fullness of salvation. 

No change occurred in my experience for several days, 
but the matter, which at times for years had engaged my 
attention, was settled without any provisos. The solemn 
vow was passed ; I was fully consecrated to the Lord. 
The old man was nailed to the cross, and there he was to 
hang until entirely dead. So much was gamed over all 
former periods. There was not the slightest wavering of 
purpose. But how to believe so as to receive the desired 
blessing I knew not. I seemed to think, that I must 
exercise a different kind of faith from that by which J waa 
justified. I would read the Bible, the Christian Manual, 
a work of great value, fall on my knees, try to believe, 
and fail as often of success ; fail because 1 tried so hard. 

At length, my mind was directed to a brother M. 
several miles distant, who had been for years a witness ol 1 


perfect love. I felt a strong impression to seek instruction 
from him. Yielding to this impression, I hastened to him 
and stated my business. He at once left his work, and 
proceeded with me to the house of Brother W. The 
object of my coming being explained, we engaged in 
prayer. After we arose, Brother M. said, "Now, Brother 
11 .tell us what have been your exercises of mind for the 
last few days ? " This I did as well as I could, and was 
remarking, that during" all that long, severe straggle, I felt 
not the slightest sense of condemnation that the expres- 
sion, "hunger and thirst after righteousness," described 
my feelings the best of anything T could think of. Brother 
ivL, interrupting, said, " See, Brother B. you say hunger 
and thirst after righteousness, expressed your feelings the 
best of anything you can think of; now why did you not 
think of the latter part of that verse ?" Quick as thought, 
my heart fastened upon it, and the promise, " for they 
shall be filled," seemed to be made especially for me. 

I cannot remember that it had occurred to me at all, 
during the period of earnest inquiry and prayer just 
described. But now it appeared so real, so tangible^ so 
entirely mine, that without hesitancy, and without effort, I 
seemed to lean upon it, to swing out upon it, as it were, 
and receive the fullness. 

O the unspeakable joy that then filled my heart. Such a 
ravishing view of my Saviour, of the glorious provisions 
of His grace, and of their manifestation to me, was over- 

" O tlie rapturous lieiglit 

Of 'that holy delight 
Wliicli I felt in the life-giving blood, 

Of my Saviour possessed, 

I was perfectly blessed, 
As if filled with the fullness of God." 

When I became able to speak, I found myself on a 

REV. P. C. SENNET. 267 

bed, with Brother M. at my side, and extending to him 
my hand, I said with unwavering assurance, "Brother M., 
I'VE GOT IT ! " Precious . hour ! Precious spot ! More, 
precious Saviour ! I could not doubt / had no desire to 
doubt. Jesus had promised; I trusted that promise. I 
had asked, and had received something. I felt sure that 
He had given me just what I had asked for. I kneAv He 
had not given me "a serpent" when I asked "a fish." 
And then, too, I saw how ample was the whole process. 
It tvas only to believe, just as when I felt the pardoning love 
of my Saviour. I saw it was the same kind of faith, only 
exercised for a different object. Then I felt an awful sense 
of guilt, and desired pardon. Faith, renunciation of self, 
and trust in Christ alone, brought the pardon 1 sought. 
Now, I felt a lack of purity, and my faith took hold of my 
Saviour as ready to impart that. I saw, too, that my 
efforts to believe failed, because, though unconsciously, T 
was really trying to work myself up into the embrace of 
my Saviour, instead of resting trusting in Him without 
effort. The consecration of myself, of all I was, of all I 
had, and of all I hoped to be, or to have ; in short, of my 
ivhole being, was made without the slightest reserve. Of 
this I had the clearest testimony of consciousness. Still, 1 
seemed to cling to this very sacrifice .after it zuas on the 
altar, as a means of bringing my heart into the desired 
union . with Jesus. But when I left this left it where it 
belonged on the altar of God, and leaned alone on the 
promise of my Saviour, the assurance of acceptance was 
given, and unutterable rapture filled my soul. 

Then it seemed to me so strange that I had lived so 
long without this fullness ; and that such multitudes in the 
church, and even in the ministry of a church that fron: 
the first had made this a prominent doctrine, and all of 
whose ordained ministers had solemnly declared that iiie} 
expected to be made perfect in love in this life, and were 


" groaning after it." I say it seemed so strange that so 
many were content to live -without it. 

With a full heart, and a heavenly influence diffused 
all through my being, I began to tell my brethren what the 
Lord had done for me, and the way in which He had led 
me. In so doing I was greatly strengthened. O what a 
privilege it was to be able, through grace, to testify from 
experience that "the blood of Christ cleanseth from all 
sin." Instead of treating the subject merely as a doctrine, 
it was to me such a heartfelt reality that it seemed a 
wonder that all could not see and embrace it at once as an 

More than twenty-one years have passed since that 
glorious event, and amid the varied experiences of this 
period I have not wavered in belief as to the reality of the 
work then wrought, nor yet as to the importance of urging 
this experience as the " central idea of Christianity." And 
I wish to add, for the admonition of those who have just 
entered the rest of perfect love, that an attempt to be 
ambiguous in my testimony on this subject, when it was 
proper to speak out plainly, has always tended to obscure 
my spiritual vision, and to diminish the ardor of my 
devotion. I am more and more persuaded that whatever 
degree of lisrht God kindles within us, must be reflected 

G o * 

upon others in word as well as in action, as a means of 
feeding the sacred flame. Such, I understand, to be the 
teaching of our Lord, and such has been one of the lessons 
of my experience. 



AVING- determined in every respect to be " cruci- 
fied with Christ," nothing of mine, which my 
long-suffering Saviour may use for the advance- 
ment of His cause, shall, with my knowledge, 
be withheld. Many providential circumstances, having 
combined to strengthen a long resisted conviction, that this 
testimony ought to be given, nay, could not be kept back 
without grieving the Holy Spirit, I send it, trusting that a 
story so humiliating to the sinner, will not fail to magnify 
the marvelous grace of the patient and loving Saviomv 

The fifteenth verse of the eighty-eighth Psalm, as it is 
translated in the Psalter of our Boole of Common Prayer, 
has to me a deep significance ; for I can truly say, " Even 
from my youth up, thy terrors have I suffered with a 
troubled mind." As far back as I can remember, death 
and the judgment were much in my thoughts, bringing 
before my childish imagination vivid and frightful pictures. 
But my first realization, that any power could banish these 
terrors, was by the death-bed of a dear cousin, who 
departed in triumph, testifying to all around her, of the 
power of Jesus to save unto the uttermost, and uttering 
with her dying breath St. Stephen's prayer, " Lord Jesus, 
receive my spirit." I was then about seventeen years of 


age, and from that time, although having no clear knowl- 
edge of the right way, tried to be a Christian. It is true 
that I had but little faith, and none of those who cared for 
my temporal welfare, manifested any concern for my soul 
Still I felt that I must have some hope to drive away the 
terror of death, and so I said my prayers conscientiously, 
went to church, and what I knew of the commandments, 
namely the letter, endeavored to keep. 

This life continued until I had entered on my twenty- 
second year, when my eyes were opened, and I saw 
the precious Saviour ; oh, how plainly. A Wesleyan 
Methodist minister, whom I knew by reputation to be most 
earnest and faithful in doing his Master's work, came to 
the place where T resided, for the purpose of doing what 
he could to awaken an interest in heavenly things, among 
a large, careless and ungodly people. I asked him to 
make my house his home. He did so, and consequently I 
attended his services as often as convenient. An evening 
discourse, the particular subject of which I cannot now 
recall, induced a train of thought, which constrained me, 
after the sermon was ended, and any member of the con- 
gregation was at liberty to speak, to rise and declare my 
determination to be no longer a merely nominal, but also 
a practical follower of Jesus. I had been striving to keep 
the law, but I had not learned of Jesus the. way to do so 
acceptably. I then resolved to become in truth an obedient 
pupil of the Divine Teacher, and although there was not a 
thought of what is called " conversion," for I had little 
acquaintance with religious phraseology, I became conscious 
that a great change was wrought within. A joy, hitherto 
quite unknown, filled my heart, and often during the night, 
I found myself uttering words of loving praise and thanks- 
giving unto my reconciled Father and His well-beloved 
Son my God and my Saviour. 

1 give this early experience thus fully, because I wish 


to testify clearly regarding another subsequent experience, 
which might otherwise be looked upon as my first experi 
mental acquaintance with the truth as it is in Jesus. 

Very soon after this great change in my inner life, I 
became impressed with the necessity, if I would retain my 
peace, of entering the Gospel ministry in fact, believing 
with St. Paul, that " woe is me if I preach not the Gospel." 
On Trinity Sunday, 1850, I was ordained, and went 
immediately to my appointed field of labor. For five 
years I wrought diligently, shrinking from no exertion, 
either physical or mental, which the Lord's work seemed 
to me to require ; yet, though in many respects blessed, I 
realized vividly that my heart devotion, fell far short of the 
Gospel requirement. 

It was not till the fall of 1855, that I caught a satis- 
factory view of the " more excellent way," and a very dear 
brother in the ministry, of our own denomination, was 
made instrumental by the Holy Spirit, in enabling me to 
secure an abundant entrance into its " pleasantness " and 
"peace." After having for some months observed this 
brother's consistent, happy walk, (as his home was but a 
mile distant from mine, and we frequently met,) I spent 
by invitation, several days in his family, in order to secure 
the rest, and release from care, needful to restore my 
impaired health. While with him, I watched closely his 
habits and conversation, and became convinced that his 
religion differed widely from mine so ividely, that I was 
. even tempted to question whether I had really been a 
Christian at all. As my visit drew near its close, I felt 
that T must learn his secret, and one morning, as he sat by 
the fireside, the heavenly peajCe resting on his spirit, was so 
evident in his countenance, that I almost involuntarily 
placed my hand upon his shoulder, and said : 

"My brother, are you always happy"? I mean, "Is 
your peace towards God never disturbed." After a few 


moments thought, as if seeking to make sure of giving a 
right testimony, he replied : 

"I think I can say, rny brother, that I am always 
happy in the Lord, always at peace towards God." 

" You must tell me how it is," I exclaimed, for I am 
not always happy sometimes I love to pray and do the 
Lord's work, and sometimes I do not. It is my desire to 
be altogether Christ's, for I have no hope but in Him ; and 
yet, though I have prayed and struggled, it seems to me 
with all the earnestness of which I am capable, I am often 
troubled, and sometimes even cold aud careless now, you 
have something which I have not, and you must tell me 
what it is. He answered, 

" My brother," all I can say is, Believe that ye receive 
these things, and ye shall have them" 

Through these words, familiar indeed, but never before 
so illumined by the Holy Spirit a bright light entered my 
soul. " Yes," I exclaimed, " I ^v^ll believe, and act as if I 
believed. All change is in me alone ; Jesus Christ is the 
same yesterday, to-day, and forever." Then these promises 
became living truths to my soul. " Thou wilt keep him 
hi perfect peace whose mind is stayed on Thee," and, 
" They that wait on the Lord shall renew their strength, 
they shall mount up with wings as eagles, they shall run 
and not be weary, they shall walk and not faint." 

In the comfort of that unwavering trust, my beloved 
Lord enabled me to walk, during the four succeeding years 
of great physical suffering, and many grievous trials. But 
nothing reached the life "hid with Christ in God," and, in 
spite of all, the " perfect peace " was kept unbroken. In 
the latter part of this period, it was my great privilege to 
enjoy intimate Christian communion with the sainted 
Eishop Hamline, and his heavenly-minded wife. How 
precious and profitable this privilege was, I have no words 
to express. From them I first learned to look upon my 


experience as identified with that which the Methodists call 
" Christian perfection," "entire sanctification," and "per- 
fect love," but though compelled to acknowledge these 
terms scriptural, I was unwilling to use them" in connection 
with myself, since I felt that they were, by many persons, 
BO sadly misapplied and misunderstood neither did I suf- 
ficiently realize the necessity of " confession with the 
mouth," as well as of faith in the heart. I speak of these 
two characteristics of my experience at that time, because, 
through them, Satan succeeded in luring me from my 
blessed refuge in the safety of the "full salvation." 

In the winter of 1860 1 was called to a new field of 
labor, in which I found none professing the happy experi- 
ence, and permitting myself to question the expediency of 
my making so singular a profession, where it would be 
inevitably misunderstood, I soon lost the power to make it 
so I did what I before deemed impossible, I entered 
again upon the struggling, dissatisfied life, and, strange in- 
consistency ! continued the unhappy strife for six weary 
weary years. At last the conflict became unendurable, and 
I felt that I must return to my rest, or miserably perish. 
Though the way before had proved so direct, yet I could 
not again find it. I resigned every position which I 
thought could stand in the way of perfect freedom, to fol- 
low the Lord's guidance, and made, it seemed to me, every 
sacrifice in my power still my spiritual condition was, 
apparently, in no wise bettered. It is true that, after each 
surrender, I was, for a little while, cheered by the Lord's 
presence, and comforted by the Holy Ghost but soon the 
darkness returned so slow was I to learn the inevitable 
duty of confession. But, at last, the moment of decision 
came, I realized that I must stand forth to the world alto- 
gether Christ's, or be rejected by the Lord forever. 

I wrote to my well-tried friend and patient sister, Mrs. 
Hamline, acknowledging all my guilty backslidings, and 


entreating her prayers. I sealed the letter; threw myself 
on my knees in an agony of supplication, and, lo! 
the blessing came I I realized, that again my heart was 
whole with my precious Saviour, and I covenanted with 
Him to testify plainly as to His all-sufficient power, in any 
way or any place which the Holy Ghost should point out. 
It has proved a precious covenant, and wonderfully have I 
been blessed in keeping it. Never before has the way 
opened for me to work so successfully for, or rather with, 
my ever-present Lord. Truly, His love passeth knowl- 
edge, and He can, indeed, strengthen with "all might," 
making us to know the "love that passeth knowledge," 
and filling us, O wonder of wonders ! " with all the full- 
ness of God." . 

I have now thus given the leading facts of an experience 
which the Holy Ghost may use for conveying unto others, 
as well as the writer, a deep practical conviction of this 
too little regarded portion of the word of God. " With 
the heart man believeth unto righteousness, and ivith the 
mouth, confession is made UNTO SALVATION." 

Fain I -would the truth, proclaim, 

That makes me free, indeed, 
Glorify my Saviour's name 1 

And all its virtues spread. 

Jesus all our wants relieves ! 

Jesus ! mighty to redeem, 
Saves, and to tlie utmost saves 

All those that come to Him. 




FIRST tasted that the Lord is gracious at a 
Camp-meeting in my native county, Cape May, 
New Jersey, in 1834, being then in my nine- 
teenth year. It was a most gracious change. 
I had indeed passed from death unto life. I cheerfully 
bore my cross, and desired to know all the will of God. 

There was but little teaching at that time in regard to 
holiness, as a distinct work- .of grace. Yet, after the first 
seasons of joy had passed away, on comparing my attain- 
ments with the word of God, of which I had become a 
careful reader, I saw there was much land yet to be 
possessed. My experience was too fluctuating, and strong 
desires for worldly gain, and worldly pleasures, would 
arise. I was also much troubled with impatience, and a 
tendency to sinful anger, to pride, and unholy ambition. 
About this time I read Mr. Wesley 's*sermons, which wero 
made a great blessing to me. His sermons on " Sin in 
Believers," on "Perfection," and the "Scripture way of 
Salvation," were peculiarly suited to my case. I also read 
the memoirs of Bramwell, Carvosso, Storer, Smith, and 
Hester Ann Rogers. 

I now saw clearly what I needed. My inmost soul 
cried out for purity for per feet love, and I determined to 


seek it with all my heart. This was about two years after 
my conversion. Having raised this standard. I grew 
rapidly in grace. I was indeed " going on to perfection," 
and had T enjoyed more outward helps, should soon have 
entered the Canaan of perfect love. But of all my 
Christian friends, only two instructed me particularly in 
regard to this higher life. Still I pressed on. At one* 
time it was suggested, "if you obtain this blessing, it will 
be your duty to confess it, and there is not one in all the 
church where you worship, that professes it, and you will 
be considered forward, and besides you may lose it, and 
bring disgrace on the cause." But I resisted this by say- 
ing, " I will try to please God, and leave the event with 

After a time I was enabled to believe, / shall obtain it, 
then, I shall obtain it soon. One evening, in secret 
prayer, I was pressing earnestly for God to cleanse me 
now. The Spirit said, " You are struggling all this time 
as if to persuade God to be willing He is willing now, 
and has been all the while. Are you ready to receive it, 
and to glorify God with it?" I said, "Yea, Lord, I am 
ready ready now." Then something whispered, "You 
are ready, and God is ready ; what hinders ? " I said, 
" Nothing hinders, I have the things I ask for ; God does 
this moment save, with full salvation bless." In that 
moment my heart was filled with love an indescribable 
comfort came into my soul, and an entire sinking into the 
will of God, with a%lear assurance, " This is perfect love, 
this is purity of heart." Then I could say for the first 
time in my life, now I love God with all my heart, soul, 
mind, and strength. 

I was soon after licensed to exhort, and in the Spring 
of 1839, was called out by the Presiding Elder to preach 
the glorious gospel. I was admitted to the New Jersey 
Conference in 1840. As I entered the ministry, I was 


fully satisfied of three important points. 1st. That I was 
converted to God. 2d. That my heart was purified by 
grace ; and 3d. That I was called to this great work. But 
I soon found that unexpected trials awaited me. I had 
promised God on my knees not to hide the light which He 
had kindled in my soul, but to preach a free, full, and 
present salvation from all sin. 

Some received this as glad tidings of great joy, but 
others doubted, and some really opposed the work. My 
brethren in the ministry, too, embarrassed me in many 
cases. True, some encouraged me, and all treated me 
kindly, yet many much older than myself, doubted the 
propriety of making this theme so prominent, and thought 
it a great pity that I had espoused it so fully. I defended 
it as best I could from Scripture, from. Mr. "Wesley's 
works, and the Methodist writers generally, showing that 
it was the peculiar calling of the Methodists to spread 
scriptural holiness over these lands. 

But, though greatly blessed in preaching, and witnessing 
frequent and powerful revivals of religion, yet, in these 
first years, 1 was painfully beset by the great adversary. 
Pie did not fail to accuse me of presumption in holding up 
so high a standard, higher than any one could live up to, 
that I was grieving my older brethren, that it would be a 
hindrance to me in the Conference all my days, and that 
I never should hold out in this way. I arose often long 
before day to wrestle with God for strength to overcome 
these temptations, and in some instances, so severe were the 
temptations, that I arose at midnight, to pray for victory 
over the dark hosts of hell. 

During the second year of ray ministry, after being 
beset for several days with these temptations, I retired far 
into the grove and poured out my soul before God. After 
about an hour's struggle, I obtained complete victory 
every cloud was wit-hdraAvn. I saw clearly that it was my 


duty to go on as at the beginning, and that God would be 
with me, and give me great success. I arose, walked to 
and fro, and praised the Lord. Then, remembering that 
Satan would most likely return again, I determined to set 
up a mark, as a witness against him. I took my knife and 
made a broad mark in the side of a small tree ! From that 
time to the present, I have not been so beset with these 
peculiar temptations. Whenever they are presented, I 
refer the adversary to the mark on the tree, and he shrinks 

Becoming established in this grace, I went on happily 
in my work, witnessing at times great outpourings of the 
Spirit, and seeing considerable numbers enter into this 
blessed experience ; at other times, too much affected by the 
discouragements in the way. But for the last few years, I 
have been wonderfully encouraged in the cause. Quite a 
large number of my brethren in the ministry have entered 
into this rest, and nearly all encourage it. Some of them 
go through the churches like naming heralds, and at the 
Camp-meetings they push the battle to the gates. Hund- 
reds, and even thousands, have proved that Jesus saves to 
the uttermost. Indeed, the flame seems to be spreading 
everywhere. Though laid aside for a season from the 
active work, yet I rejoice that I have lived to see these 
days. My soul doth magnify the Lord, and my spirit 
doth rejoice in God my Saviour. Glory to God in the 
highest, on earth peace and good will to men. 

" Jesus ! I love Thy charming name, 

'Tis music in my ear, 
Fain would I sound it out so loud, 

That Heaven and earth might hear. 

I'd carve my passion on the bark, 

And every fruitful tree 
Should droop and bear some mystic mark, 

That Jesus bled for me." 

r. j. tf. STOCKTON. 


N 1843, 1 was appointed class-leader by the Rev* 
T>. D. Lore, and the following year licensed to 
exhort. I exercised in the capacity of an 
exhorter and class-leader until the 12th of 
December, 1846, when there came another still heavier 
cross ; I was licensed to preach the glorious Gospel of Christ. 
In the year 1852, twenty years after my conversion to 
God, I was led into a more extended field of labor. I was 
called upon by the Rev. John K. Shaw, who sent me to 
Englishtown Circuit, New Jersey Conference, as a supply, 
where I labored pleasantly and successfully during the year. 
About one hundred souls were converted to God and 
joined the church. In the spring of 1853, I attended the 
New Jersey Annual Conference, for the first time, which 
was held at Briclgeton, Bishop Morris presiding. It was a 
precious feast to me. I was received on trial the 19th 
day of April, and appointed to Middlesex Mission at that 
Conference. It was a hard field, but I was strong and 
vigorous, able to labor. I went to work in faith. God 
greatly blessed me, and the people. During the year, one 
hundred and twenty souls were converted, many of them 
advanced in life, several over seventy years of age. The 
following spring I was renppointed to the same field. 


I have now reached a period in my religious experience 
of great interest. I have passed over my early religious 
life, and approached a time when my mind was fully awak- 
ened to the necessity of a clean heart. I refer to the 
morning when I stood before Bishop Waugh, to be 
addressed before the Conference, previous to being ordained 
for the solemn work of the ministry. O what a day ! O 
what, an address ! and during that address, the Bishop put 
the following searching questions to the class, which fully 
aroused me to the important qualification for the work of 
the ministry, and I have heard these same questions put to 
every candidate for the ministry, previous to being ordained. 

Lord help every minister to remember the answers given 
to these questions. I have always been a reader and 
believer of Methodist theology and discipline, which contains 
the theory of Bible holiness, and I don't understand how 
it is that Methodist preachers and people can ignore 
holiness of heart and life, and call it a "new light." 
To do so, it seems to me such persons must cut 
out about one-third of the hymns in our hymn book, 
deface the discipline, and mutilate the Bible on almost 
every page. Such a Christian would have a sad look- 
ing set of tools to work with in the Lord's vineyard-. 
But it was not so with me, I wanted all the best helps 

1 could get, and when the Bishop asked me, " Have you 
faith in Christ?" I could answer positively in the affirm- 
ative. And when he put the next question, " Are you 
going on to perfection*?" I had no difficutly, as I supposed 
we were to grow on and on, until we reached it, just as 
some are now contending for a "growth into it," and then 
came the third question, "Do you expect to be made per- 
fect in love in this life ? " this did not puzzle me, as I 
supposed the Lord would finish the work before death. 
But when the following question came, " Are you groaning 
after it ? " I confess I was confounded. I did not know 


what to reply. I was afraid to say no, and I was not pre- 
pared to say yes. The good Bishop's eyes were upon us, 
and God's eye was looking at us ; a definite answer seemed 
to be required ; my mind had to work quickly, and I think 
I began at that very moment to groan, and I said yes, faintly, 
and I groaned on and on, but groaning did not bring the 
blessing. I prayed for it, I wept for it, I read for it, I 
consecrated for it, but did not obtain it. I heard no one 
talk about it, I heard no one preach it. Thus I worked 
along in my own poor crippled way, until August of that 
same year, when I resolved to attend a Camp-meeting to 
be held at Titusville. I said nothing to my wife or any one 
else, but I resolved in my own mind to go to that meeting, 
in order to seek the blessing of "perfect love." 

As I had now reached a point when I must have it, I 
could not do any longer without it. Everything seemed 
dry and unsatisfactory. I had reached a point of necessity. 
The Spirit brought me just there, and since I have experL 
enced the blessing, I have seen many others led by the 
Holy Spirit in the same way. 

I had that intense thirst for the blessing that I cannot 
describe. No sense of guilt or condemnation, such as I 
had for pardon many years before, but an intense desire 
for " heart purity," " perfect love," " holiness," or " entire 
sanctification," so much so, that it was an immediate 
necessity. I could not go home without it, I could not 
preach without it. But I did not obtain it by groaning 
after it, neither by desiring, thirsting, hungering, praying, 
tears, or .consecration. I was led to go into a tent where 
a few brethren and sisters were holding a prayer-meeting. 
I deliberately took up a small Bible, and turned, almost 
without thinking, to the 36th chapter of* Ezekiel, 25th, 
26th, 27th, and 28th verses. I laid my finger on those 
precious promises, and said, I want all in the tent who are 
willing to consecrate themselves this moment, entirely to 


the Lord, and believe these promises as I. would read them 
to kneel. I kept my finger on them as we all knelt 
down on the straw. I commenced reading and believ- 
ing. " Then will I sprinkle clean water upon you, and ye 
shall be clean : from all your filthiness, and from all your 
idols will I cleanse you. A new heart also will I give you, 
and a new spirit will I put within you, and I will take 
away the stony heart out of your flesh, and I will give you 
a heart of flesh. And I will put my Spirit within you, 
and cause you to walk in my statutes, and keep my judge- 
ments and do them. And ye shall dwell in the land that 
I gave to your fathers, and ye shall be my people, and I 
will be your God." 

I not only read it, but I believed it, and I sang it, for 
it was at that meeting where I first sang the chorus, which 
is now sung all over the land to that good old hymn, 
" Come thou fount of every blessing," &c., with the chorus, 

" I will sprinkle you with water, 

I will cleanse you from all sin, 
Sanctify and make you Holy : 
I will corne and dwell within." 

We sang heartily and believed it. The Lord has blessed 
hundreds while singing that promise. I don't know how 
many received the blessing of "perfect love," in that meet- 
ing, but I do know, that while claiming that sweet prom- 
ise, my soul entered into perfect rest. 

It did not come as I expected it would, with overwhelm- 
ing power, but a sweet calm, resting down on Christ fully 
satisfied. The struggle was over. I had the witness that 
I was all the Lord's. I had not been seeking properly 
before that time. I was trying to get happy, instead of 
resting down on God's promise, but as soon as I rested my 
all on God's Word, something said " That is it, the blood 
now cleanses." O what a perfect satisfaction I had with 


Jesus. I returned to my work with new life, new power, 
new gifts for usefulness. Truly it was the gift of power 
received by Faith. O how light and easy everything seemed 
to move with me. The Bible was illuminated I had heard 
of such Bibles for sale, but I never saw one before prayer 
was easy, preaching was easy, visiting was easy, talking to 
sinners was easy everything was just right. "I lived by 
faith," which is the only Avay to live. 

I was not so emotional as some are, and yet it has 
pleased the Lord, at times, to fill me with the Spirit. I 
have had much more of the Spirit's manifestations since, 
than when I first received the blessing of a clean heart. 
I believe the heart must be cleansed by faith in the blood 
of Christ, before the baptism of the Spirit and power is 
given. I often hear our good brethren pray most earnestly 
for the baptism, when they have made but little sacrifice 
or consecration, and not bound their offering on God's 
altar, nor appropriated the promises. Now, if we under- 
stand the promise by which God gives the baptism or the 
gift of power all the tithes must be brought into the 
storehouse first. 

0, if all the Church would do this, including the min- 
istiy, what a baptism would fall upon us ; the Pentecost 
would be repeated. That is what the entire Church did 
on that day when the promise of the Father came. Over 
twelve years have passed away since I received the bless- 
ing of " perfect love," during which time I have not been 
exempt from trials and temptations, but I have been 
enabled to say, "The will of the Lord be clone." "Faith 
and its Effects " have been of great service to me, and I 
have been wonderfully blessed, in helping others into the 
fountain of full salvation. 

It is my greatest pleasure to do good. I find it exceed- 
ingly profitable to the Church, and my own soul, to hold 
special meetings, one night in the week in my charge, for 


the promotion of Christian holiness, notwithstanding the 
outcry against specialties. They are good for me and my 
people. Those of my members who oppose them, cannot 
stay away from them long, and finally they experience the 
blessing of "perfect love," and then they like those meet- 
ings in which holiness is taught the most. So, also, in 
preaching on the subject, some of our fastidious brethren 
think we are doing harm in preaching Holiness definitely, 
but when they experience it for themselves, they wonder 
how we can get along without preaching it, and how people 
can live without it. Many of the members of the church 
I am now serving have obtained this blessing the most of 
my official board and others are now earnestly seeking. 
Praise the Lord ! When I came to this charge, there 
was not a single professor of the blessing of " perfect love." 
To God be all the glory for his wonderful work. 

Thy power and saving truth TO show, 
A warfare at Thy charge I go, 

Strong in tlie Lord, and in Thy might, 
Gladly take up the hallowed cross, 
And suffering all tilings for Tliy cause, 

Beneath thy bloody banner fight 

A spectacle to fiends and men, 
To all tlieir fierce or cool disdain, 

With calmest pity I submit ; 
Determined nought to know beside 
My Jesus and Him crucified, 

I tread the world beneath my feet. 

O God ! let all my life declare, 
How happy all Tliy servants are, 

How far above all earthly things ; 
How pure when waslied in Jesus' blood ; 
How intimately one with God, 

A heaven-born race of priests aud kings. 



T the age of eighteen, in my native village, in 
Central New York, I gave myself to the 
Saviour. At once, my attention was caEecl, 
by my class-leader, to the work of entire saiic- 
tification. Just then arose an unhappy controversy con- 
cerning this doctrine. This controversy created in me a 
disrelish for the entire subject. I practically resolved to think 
no more about it ; at least, until the "doctors could agree." 

While pursuing the studies of my college course, I had 
concluded to embrace the law, as my profession for life. 
Hence, on graduating, I soon entered on the study of law, 
which I pursued until I secured my certificate of admission 
*o the bar. God, however, overruled my plans ; and in 
obedience to His will, at the age of twenty-one, I entered 
on the regular work of a Methodist itinerant. 

For five years, I gave myself, as far as I knew, unres- 
ervedly to the work of God. I ever found acceptance 
with the people. In fact, success appeared to be sent of 
God in all departments of ministerial labor, save in one ; 
viz., the salvation of souls. In this I had but limited 
success. I often lamented my lack of "revival power." 
At times, I became quite discouraged in view of my limited 
success in this work. 


At the end of five years- of labor in the regular work, 
I was led (as I firmly believe), in the providence of God, 
to enter on the work of a teacher in one of the academies 
within the bounds of our conference. My great motive 
was, increased qualification to be secured thus, for subse- 
quent ministerial efficiency. I have sometimes thought 
that my comparatively limited success in the work of saving 
souls may have had some influence in the matter. I 
remained teaching four years. During this time, I preached 
frequently; and was instrumental, under God, in the 
salvation of a number of souls. The Lord gave rne 
success in teaching. 

After four years of experience as an instructor, in 
answer to what I believed was a call of God, I re-engaged 
in my former work. During the first four months of my 
labors on my charge, my experience, personal and minis- 
terial, was not unlike that of former years. We had a 
church enterprise which engaged our attention, and which 
God conducted to a successful issue. 

From the commencement of my ministerial experience, 
through a period of nine and a half years, faint glimmer- 
ings of something better, and deeper, and sweeter, and more 
complete in Christian experience than I was possessed of, 
would occasionally appear ; but they were only transient, 
because unwelcome and unheeded, from my prejudice 
against the whole subject of so-called "heart-purity." 

In the fall succeeding the 'time just referred to, I 
attended the Camp-meeting of our district. My charge 
had no tent. I was led, in the providence of God, to 
make my home, during most of the meeting, at a tent 
where personal holiness was the great theme. It was 
tirged upon me by friends: I acquiesced in their views, 
but did not fully give myself up to the work. I returned 
from the meeting, thinking more and more favorably on the 
subject than ever before. 

REV. Cr'. M. FIERCE., 287 

On my return, I felt restlved to go to work for the 
salvation of souls in right good earnest. I worked hard, 
but yet with only limited success. There was evidently 
weakness somewhere. I felt all along, during the remain 
der of the conference year, that I ought to be able to 
"reckon myself dead indeed unto sin, but alive unto God 
through Jesus Christ our Lord ;" yet my mind was befog- 
ged. I had conviction ; resolved again and again to be 
altogether the Lord's ; prayed often, " Lord, sanctify me, 
soul and body ; " yet no light. I promised, when God 
would give the needed light, I would walk in it. 

I had felt, at the close of the conference year, that, in 
view of my limited success in "winning soul?," it would be 
better for the charge to have a man of more "revival 
power " sent them the next year. Still, it appearing to be 
the general wish of the charge, no change was made. 
During the summer, my convictions for a deeper work of 
grace in my heart was increased. I felt that a revival 
was needed, and resolved that I would not be in the way, 
and told the Lord I was willing to be any thing, or do any 
thing for the furtherance of this object. How often I 
wished I could " drop in," even but for a few moments, at 
" 23 St. Mark's Place," for advice and counsel concerning 
" the higher life ! " I still covenanted with God, that when 
He sent the light, that I might see my way clear, I would 
walk in the light. I was sincere in this declaration ; yet 
it may be that the covenant, or contract, was the more 
readily made, that thus I might, for the time fieinff, satisfy 
my conscience for neglect of doing the work then, and still 
retain my justification. 

This year I resolved that we, as a people, should be 
well represented at the Camp-meeting. We had a goodly 
number present at the whole meeting. I there learned to 
account for my convictions on the subject of entire sancti- 
fication, since we last met on the camp-ground. Friends 


had been wrestling with God during the entire year, that 
fullness of liberty might be mine. Holiness was the great 
theme at the Camp-meeting. It was preached from the 
stand, and was the constant subject of conversation among 
the more devout. My own convictions on the subject 
were very strong : still I procrastinated. I purchased the 
work on " Perfect Love," by .Rev. J. A. Wood. I com- 
menced its perusal, and endeavored to satisfy my mind for 
delay with the thought, " After I read the book, and see 
my way clearly, I will act." I still renewed my covenant 
solemnly with God, that, when the light came, I would 
walk in it. 

On Friday morning, Eev. Henry Belden, of Brooklyn, 
preached. His theme was holiness. Its presentation was 
clear and happy. Darkness and fog were dispelled, in a 
great measure, from my mind. This sermon was followed 
by one from Rev. J. A. Wood, on the same subject. Before 
lie had concluded, the last vestige of darkness was gone, 
and I had no longer even the flimsiest pretext for further 
delay. Those two sermons were of remarkable clearness 
and power. Hundreds, to their dying day, will thank God 
for them. 

I now had received what I had long sought, and on 
which I had based my promise to God, that, when I should 
receive such as this, I would yield. But, strange to say, I 
still refused to act. I then had reason to believe that I 
had all along made the promise, conditioned thus, too much 
as a soother of my conscience for delay. At the close of 
the prayer meeting, after the preaching before mentioned, 
all, preachers and people, who were willing to covenant at 
that time to wrestle with God to secure full salvation 
before the Camp-meeting broke up, were invited to mani- 
fest it by the uplifted hand. I was unwilling to make the 
covenant then. I was also unwilling to let the people, 
especially those of my charge, know that I would not make 

REV. G. M. PIERCE. 289 

the consecration. I dared not assume such a responsibility. 
I therefore sat down behind the seekers on the stand, and, 
at the close of the meeting, retired to my tent, restless and 
unhappy, and conscious that I had violated my pledge to God. 

At once a prayer meeting was called for in our tent. 
About the middle of the meeting I could no longer pray 
or speak, but, under the convicting and melting power of 
God, could only sob like a child. My pride was mortified, 
myself humbled, to be thus exercised in the presence of 
my people. After this trial in the crucible for more than 
an hour, with my pride humbled, myself extremely broken 
down, I could only say, " Lord, only this ; and what is thy 
will ? " It seemed at once as if God, by His Spirit's 
impress, thus addressed me : " My will is your entire sanc- 
tification. You promised me, that, when the light came, 
you would walk in it. The light has been afforded; and 
yet you are ungratefully and criminally allowing your 
pride of heart, your prejudices and imperfect professors of 
heart-purity, and your fear, lest, if the fullness of the 
Spirit should be poured upon you, you should be obliged 
to be exercised in some way that would not be acceptable 
to the carnal mind, and you should not be popular, you 
are allowing all this to make you a perjurer in my sight; 
for you are thus, in the violation of your solemn pledge, 
lying, not unto man, but unto God." 

Oh, what a view God then gave me of my folly, ingrat- 
itude, and sinfulness, in thus treating my Saviour, when 
desirous of bestowing a most blessed boon upon me ! I 
was enabled to yield, after quickly and yet thoroughly 
weighing the matter. I freely gave up all, pride, preju- 
dice, regard for man's applause or worldly popularity as a 
preacher, and simply, by faith in His word, took Jesus 
as my Saviour from all sin. At once Avas presented to me, 
as a cross that must be borne, "You must go out to the 
prayer-meeting before the stand, and make your confession 


and consecration known to preachers and people, -without 
a moment's hesitation." I responded, " Christ helping me, 
I will." This was one of the most trying requirements of 
my ministerial life. The cross was heavy, and a burden was 
removed from my heart ; and, during the rest of the meeting, 
I felt like a prisoner at liberty. How many times since have 
I blessed God that He held me to the work at that time ! 

I had no evidence direct from the Spirit, while on the 
camp-ground, that God had saved me wholly, nor did I 
have for several days afterward ; though the consecration 
was full, and the faith unwavering. Still the people of 
my charge remarked that there was evidently a great 
change in4he spirit of my preaching, on the Sabbath after 
my return. The direct Spirit evidence soon fully came ; 
though I cannot say at what particular moment, or in 
what special mode, except that it seemed to come, like the 
morning light, gradually. The words which would best 
express my feelings when deliverance fully came, and 
which are the best hid ex to my constant Christian standing, 
since that full deliverance, are ABIDING IN CHRIST. 

I now, as my life, realize an unrestricted intimacy with 
the Saviour, a consciousness that whatever is not to the 
glory of God is distasteful to my heart, the worth of the 
soul, and the sanctification of the gospel. The privilege of 
the true believer is a life of faith, limited solely by the 
word of God ; which life is one of constant reliance on 
God, and expectation of fruit from Him. This lias been 
my experience in preaching, in the various means of social 
grace, and in my visiting from house to house ; while in 
the constant panting within for all the fullness of God, 
and in the unceasing burning of soul for the salvation of 
others, to which the Lord is abundantly responding, 1 
realize that the spirit of Christ is fully mine. 

"Bless the Lord, O my soul! and all that is within 
me, bless His holy name." 



NEVEE hear a person speak with grateful 
emotions of a Christian parentage, without, 
feelings of virtuous envy, for the home circum- 
stances of my early life were not favorable to 
the development of Christian character. My parents were 
unconverted. In my father's shop, where I was early 
placed to work, the men were xisually very intemperate 
and profane. But during these years, I was the subject of 
constant and definite religious conviction. My earliest 
recollections are associated with prayer and penitence, 
with a fear of wrong doing, and dread of the Divine dis- 
pleasure. I was early taken by my father's apprentice to 
the Wesleyan Sabbath-school, in England. There my 
sensitive nature was deeply impressed by the pious, unpaid 
labors of some of the best minds in the town, as Sabbath- 
school teachers. Their singleness of purpose, devotion 
and zeal, fixed in my confidence the truth, that Christianity 
was God's plan of saving men. My confidence secured, I 
read its Bible and literature with unusual avidity. 

The Sabbath-school library, my only resource, was 
not, as now, filled with a semi-religious literature, especially 
prepared and diluted to accommodate the tastes of the 
young, but contained the best religious works of England 
and America. I cared but little for company, less for 
sinful pleasure. My convictions increased, but my heart 
repelled the necessity to which I was fast coming, of a 
public and permanent Christian life. To accommodate this 
rebellion of the heart, I sought infidel books and lectures, 


of wliich there were many. The patience of God contin- 
ued ; He did not heed my spurning ; He did not leave me 
to the way I would have chosen. I still remained in the 
Sabbath-school, and in my sixteenth year I was sweetly 
drawn to the cross. 

On Good Friday of 1841, the controversy was settled ; 
hut I did not obtain pardon till the following June, though 
1 sought it with tears, prayers, and fasting. But then it 
was so graciously bestowed so definitely attested, that I 
have never doubted its genuineness. I am thus particular 
in the detail of my conversion and its previous conditions, 
that none may charge my subsequent experience to an 
extravagant enthusiasm, or doubt its reality. God gave 
me from that hour an unspeakable peace and rest in His 
dear Son. I knew not one hour's abatement of fellowship 
with God until He sanctified me wholly. My purpose and 
consecration were at that time so severely tested, by those 
of my own household, that now, after the lapse of nearly 
twenty-seven years, I dream "nearly every night that I am 
a youth again, and subject to those terrible ordeals. But I 
was anchored, and the Rock held me. I was " strengthened 
with all might, according to His glorious power, unto all 
patience and long suffering with joyfulness." 

I now "hid the Word in my heart," and read with 
increasing delight the lives of Wesley, Fletcher, Bramwell. 
Carvosso, and especially of Mrs. Eogers. With their 
experience and soul hunger I was in deep sympathy ; was 
instructed and impressed by their intelligent appreciation 
of the gospel design. Looking through their eyes, that 
design became transparent to me the entire sanctification of 
every power to God. I wondered that no one preached 
on this subject, that but few spoke of it. I looked to my 
seniors for counsel, but they were silent. My class-leader 
was a good man, but groping in the twilight. There was 
not a leader in the church, or minister in the neighborhood, 


who professed the blessing of heart purity. I was, there 
fore, much alone with God and my. books. I did not under 
value my justification, nor lose the witness of adoption, 
yet was so hungry for righteousness, and so eager to obtain 
all the fullness of God often pleading, 

" I cannot rest till pure within." 

The bliss of Divine communion increased each day, so 
did my longings for purity. I seemed to be lured by a 
charm to which T readily yielded ; resistance was aU gone. 
The fiery trial continued, but to live or die, I was equally 
willing, if God would make me holy. As my day so was 
my strength. I had but little to consecrate, except my 
future life, and whatever talents or influence God might 
bestow ; but the consecration was made. Not in detail 
detail involved hesitation ; the process was too slow for one 
who felt that all was the Lord's. Bought by blood, attract- 
ed by love, I was impatient that I could not leap upon the 
altar. I fretted only at the poverty of my gift, the slowness 
of my faith, and the littleness of my love ; but I loved Him. 

There had been no pause in my religious life, from 
which I was now to be recovered by seeking perfect love. 
I had been "led by the Spirit." My lack of teachers, 
had been measurably compensated by a fond devotion to 
the class of books I have indicated, so that my efforts after 
full salvation were grounded in deep conviction. I saw 
that the lowest point of safety for me was holiness of 
heart. It was not a matter of choice to be this, or some 
thing else, in the religious life, but this, or religious coldness 
and loss of the dear communion, I prized more than life. 
This, or the certainty of backsliding ; this, or the loss of 
power ; this, or defeat by the antagonisms around me. 

I saw that less than holiness of heart, was less than 
obedience, and disobedience was sin. That only as I 
" walked in the light*, could I have fellowship with God.' 



In my closet, with the promises in my hand, the remnant 
of my own works abandoned, no longer looking at my 
feelings, or waiting for ecstacy, or asking the solution of 
difficulties, I trusted for completeness in Christ. Not in a 
mixture of Him and myself, but in Him alone. At that 
moment He saved me fully. I rose, not only free, but full. 
I had never been full before. I was " satisfied ; " my 
1, unger allayed. A broad, deep, divine rest was mine ; a 
sense of inward cleanness and power. It was deeper than 
eestacy, broader than my nature, the exact complement 
for my wants. I was young, my nature intense, my future 
uncertain, my immediate surroundings unfriendly, but this 
perfect grace met all my necessities ; my cup ran over. 

During a ministry of varied successes and trials, 
extending through tAventy years, Jesus has been, is now, 
my perfect Saviour. My experience has not been an effort, 
but a luxury. I have seen the doctrine assailed ; its pro- 
fessors suspected and shunned ; the indiscretions of some 
charged upon all ; the subject avoided in the pulpit, or so 
generalized that our people had become indifferent or dis- 
satisfied ; the sharp distinctions of piety had become so 
impalpable that men doubted the superior excellence of the 
Christian life, and the sincerity of the Christian belief and 
profession ; the Church was so secularized that she was 
not known as " the bride, the Lamb's wife ; " the world, 
which hated the Master, no longer hated the Church, 
because it was so much like it. In such a state of things 
I have seen this doctrine applied with uniform results of 
stability, joy and power, the conversion of souls and the 
comfort of believers. So manifest has been its power 
within my own observation, in both lands, and so divine its 
influence over my own life, that henceforth, as heretofore, 
concerning it, "my heart is fixed." My banner, shield and 
breast-plate bear but one inscription " HOLINESS TO THE 
LOUD.'" I have consecrated, the Lewi has sanctified. 



EOM the very first of my religious awakenings, 
I had a desire to be holy. This may not, and 
probably does not, accord with the experience 
of others : nevertheless, it is my own. I 
remember, when but a little boy, being in attendance at a 
Camp-meeting where the power of God was evidently 
manifested ; and, as I beheld others falling like dead men, 
under the outpouring of the Divine Spirit, I earnestly 
coveted such a blessing for myself. I longed to have some 
one converse with me, and lead me as a little child to the 
Saviour of sinners ; one of which I felt I was, even then. 
But no one spoke a word to me on the subject of my 
soul's salvation ; supposing, doubtless, that I was too 
young to realize any thing about the truth of God. 

I grew up in sin. The family altar, the Sabbath- 
school, the social meetings to which I was often led, the 
faithful preaching of the "Word of God, none of these 
saved me from being a very wicked boy. It was my 
nature to be sinful. I loved to transgress law. So far as 
I have any recollection of the matter, I went astray as soon 
as I was born, 

When I was about eleven years old, God took my eldest 
sister, at about thirteen years of age, to himself. She was 


the first one I ever saw launch out over the dark river : 
and I am glad she was ; for death has seemed much like a 
kind friend to me ever since. Her triumphant exit 
fastened the truth in my soul, " God's children die well.' 
But after a little, except at intervals, these serious 
impressions left me ; and, at the age of sixteen, I was a 
hardened and impenitent sinner. One young man, my 
most intimate associate, went to the State Penitentiary, 
convicted of high crime ; with whom, my association had 
been providentially broken off only a little while before. 
While he went to prison, God sent me into the mining 
district of Lake Superior. While there, away from my 
companions in. sin, my conviction of guilt took a deep hold 
upon, my heart. It was a dreadfully bitter cup I drank 
of, until one night in December, while bowed at my 
mother's side in the log-cabin of a copper-miner, a flood of 
joy overwhelmed me. I praised, I shouted, I laughed, I 
cried aloud for joy. There seemed to be no bottom to the 
depth of that well which had sprung up within me. My 
happiness continued for weeks. It did seem to me at 
times that the angels could know no higher rapture than 
filled my heart as I sung, 

" But now I am happy in Him, 
December's, as pleasant as May." 

I had great freedom and great comfort in offering 
salvation through Christ to all I could meet. 

Soon after my conversion, I left home again for school. 
Here, amid the excitements of earnest study, and an 
unguarded ambition to be first in my class, religion soon 
became a secondary matter. And thus it continued until 
the winter of 1855 and 1856, when, while teaching, and I 
was feeling the necessity of a better qualification for my 
responsibilities, Mrs. Palmer's " Way of Holiness " fell into 
my hands. It brought me 'the clearest light I had ever 

REV. A. M. 8TEELE. 297 

found on the subject that had always, whenever I turned 
my thoughts towards it, taken so deep a hold upon me. A 
revival broke out in an adjoining district ; and, during its 
progress, I entered the way of holiness. God saved me ; 
and I was able to declare all that Pie had done for my poor 
soul, even before those who did not believe the truth. 

But that divine blessing went away. At the tune, I 
did not know how. I desired, above all things, to retain 
it. But praying nor fasting nor groaning could hold it. I 
lacked faith. After the blessing was gone, I drifted loosely 
for years ; I entered the traveling connection ; I took the 
solemn vows of the sacred office ; I was examined 
especially upon this point by devout and godly men ; I 
studied and prayed and preached : but, if I went either 
way, it was backwards, from God. None were awakened, 
none converted, under my labors. I feared I had mistaken 
my calling. In this state of mind, I attended our district 
Camp-meeting, held near Quincy, where I was laboring in 
the summer of 1865. My condition at this tune really 
alarmed me. I felt that I was not even in a justified state. 
My convictions for holiness, at the same time, were never 
so deep, so clear, so distressing ; nor did the way ever seem 
so dark, so concealed. All I could do was to sit down, and 

" Sigli to think of happier days, " 

When tliou, O Lord 1 wast nigli ; 
When every heart was tuned to praise, 
And none more Nest than I.' 1 

The powers of darkness were let loose upon me. In 
spite of myself, my thoughts, at times, were blasphemous. I 
felt that I must curse God and die. But, oh ! how could 
I die with the memory of those blessed days upon me ? 
Ob, to be damned, when once I had been so completely 
saved! to go to perdition in holy orders! A good 
brother, filled with the Holy Ghost, was giving instruction 


to several inquiring ones just as I entered a tent of prayer 
The Spirit signified that his words were for me by apply 
ing them at once to my heart. I felt that my hour had 
come. He told us of the consecration we must make. I 
understood that perfectly well, nor was I long in bringing 
all to the altar. Then he began to speak about faith. 
How many enter not in because of unbelief, even after 
they have brought their all to the borders of the promised 
land ! My great struggle was for faith. Could 7 believe 
God would trust me with that great blessing again ? 
Presently faith came. Oh, the blissful assurance ! Blessed 
be God ! how my soul mounted up ! how it sunk down too ! 
When I returned to myself, I found the house swept and 
garnished. I felt so clean in my heart ! The Purifier had 
passed through me ; and He left it written in the chambers 
of my full soul, " J 'will; be thou clean." 

It is a wonder God saved me ; and oh, the treachery 
of this poor doubting soul ! I lost the blessing even then, 
again. I know where I lost it this time. I went home 
from the camp-ground one night. My wife and little ones 
were safely in their beds. I never loved them before as I 
did then. " Now," said the Spirit, " before you sleep, do 
tell the companion of your joys what God has done for you 
on the camp-ground." Oh ! how could I have halted at so 
plain a duty ? But I stopped, and said, '" Thou knowest, 
Lord, my good wife is not of this way of thinking. She 
does not believe in this thing at all. Would it not be better 
for me first to convince her of the reality of this state of 
grace ly my life ? I will confess it in the class-room ; I 
will preach it in the pulpit ; I will live it at home, and in 
a very little while she will acknowledge and embrace it." 
Just as if I knew better than God ! But even then the 
blessed Spiiit bore with me. It revealed my error ; but I 
lost the blessing. Winter came. Revival efforts com- 
menced. I went home from meeting, where God had been 

REV. A. M. STEELE. 299 

blessing the people, one night, and found my companion 
weeping. I soon learned the cause of her trouble. "Oh, 
husband ! " said she, " how unfaithful to God I am living ! 
Will you pray for me ? " "We prayed, and the Lord 
blessed her. She had heard my witness before the con- 
gregation, and was deeply convicted for the blessing of 
holiness. Could I have borne the cross then, and told her 
all the Lord had done for me, and urged her to a full con- 
secration to God, how blessed would it have been for us 
both ! At the Coldwater Camp-meeting last July, I had 
to go over the same ground again. God again set me at 
liberty and at rest. I cannot ask to have my own way 
now : God knows best. If the blessed Spirit impresses me 
with a sense of duty, I must not stop to parley. I am 
becoming established. Sinners are being converted ; and, 
bless God ! His dear children are being renewed in love. 
May it never be that I shall again grieve Him by doubting 
His grace ! Thus the long deferred hope of my life is 
deferred no longer. My sick heart is made well in Jesus. 

This perfect love 'tis perfect, perfect bliss. ^ 
All is well ! All is well ! 

Oh, what a happy, happiness is this ! 

All is well ! All is well ! 

My Jesus whispers, tliou are mine, 

And all in me, my child is tMne, 

Oh, these are transports all divine ! 

All is well ! All is well ! 

Rise ! Rise my soul, and onward, onward still. 

All is well ! All is well ! 
God, will with all. with all His fullness fill. 

All is well ! All is well ! 
Stronger than death, His love to thee, 
And thou to all eternity 
A monument of grace slialt be, 

All is well ! All is well J 



HEN twelve years of age God for Christ's sake 
spoke peace to my soul. I need not say I had 
much with which to contend, for I was sur- 
rounded by a class of young men who ridiculed 
religion aud spiritual things whose hearts had never felt 
or experienced the healing and heavenly influence imparted 
by grace divine, and in whose souls the " Sun of Kight- 
ousness " had never risen. 

My experience was wavering, I had never heard a 
sermon preached on " Christian Holiness," consequently, 
was almosjb entirely ignorant as regards this blessing, but I 
endeavored to serve God according to the light I had. 

Thus time passed on. I had always been impressed 
with the idea that I was called to the ministry, but waving 
my convictions, I plunged into the business-cares of the 
world ; but there was no rest for me, until in my nine- 
teenth year I received license to exhort. In this capacity 
I served the Church some time j finally, was licensed to 
preach, and then recommended to the East Baltimore 
Conference, which was then convened in Danville, Pa. I 
attended the session of Conference, which proved a great 
blessing to my soul. 

I was received into the traveling connection, and was 

REV. C. 0. COOK. 301 

appointed to Hancock Circuit. This, the first year of my 
ministry, was marked with great success. God was with 
me ; yet up to this time I had never spoken on the theme 
of " Perfect Love." The following spring I was appointed 
to Frostburg, Ct., and while traveling this circuit, having 
been thrown into the company of some who enjoyed this 
" blessing," I became very much exercised on the subject. 
I greatly felt my need of it. I knew there were heights 
and breadths, and lengths and depths in the love of Jesus 
to which I had not attained. 

It so happened that, while in this state of mind, I was 
called to Baltimore. There I heard of Dr. Roberts' meet- 
ings, which I determined to attend the following Sabbath. 
I did so, and while there I heard the young and old tell 
how they had received this blessing ; but the experience 
of one young man arrested me very forcibly the sub- 
stance of which was this : " Before he had received this 
grace, his experience was wavering. At one time, he said, 
he was on Pisgah's top, and then again down in the valley." 
This had been my experience exactly ; but he went on to 
say, " As soon as he felt the cleansing power of the blood 
of Jesus his experience became even, and that 

" Jesus, all the day long, 
Was his joy and Ms song." 

This was what I needed. An invitation was then given 
to those persons who desired the blessing, to present them- 
selves at the altar. I weiit forward, and while in thai 
attitude, a good brother came to me and told me what was 
necessary in order to receive the blessing. (That I felt my 
need of it was clearly evinced by presenting myself at the 
altar.) 1st. A full consecration of all and every thingo 
2d. Faith to believe my sacrifice was accepted. 

I then asked myself, " Are you willing to give up every 
thing ? " I said, " Yes, Lord, every thing all is Thine," 


"Then cannot you believe He accepts" "Yes, Lord, 
I said, "I do believe." Oh, what a flood of peace flowed into 
my soul. O, glory be to God ! it was truly a joy unspeak 
able, and full of glory. The blood of Jesus I felt did cleanse 
me from all sin. From that time I commenced preaching 
on the subject, and every tiine I preached it, I gained more 
strength. I enjoyed uninterrupted communion with Jesus 
for some time ; but, after a while the sin of unbelief took 
possession of my heart, and I fell back into my previous 
state of despondency. 

The following spring I was sent to "Westminster, Ct. 
While traveling that circuit I met with many who enjoyed 
this blessing. I again became deeply exercised on the 
subject (though I had never entirely lost sight of it). After 
leading class on Sabbath morning, at one of the appoint- 
ments on the circuit, a brother said to me, " Bro. Cook, 
meet me at a throne of grace, every evening between sun- 
set and dark, from this time until you come around again, 
and make the attainment of this blessing the subject of 
prayer." It was Y r ednesday preceding my next appoint- 
ment that I was riding to church, to attend my protracted 
meetings. I lifted up my heart to God in prayer, and 
accompanying the prayer was an earnest living faith, the 
sacrifice having previously been made, and Jesus was mine. 
I felt Him mine ; the trees, the stars, every thing seemed 
to shout forth the praise of the Kedeenier, and I shouted, 
Glory to God. Jesus was to me, all, and in all and since 
that time, "Jesus, all the daylong, has been my joy and my 
song." Precious Saviour, blessed Jesus; His blood c ( leansos 
from all sin, and gives me victory. 



N 1859 I was rescued by the hand of Jesus from 
the horrible pit and miry clay of infidelity, and 
felt called at once to preach the Gospel of 
Christ. Without stopping to mend my net, I 
proceeded at once to obey the call. 

In 1860 I joined the N. W. Wisconsin Conference. In 
1 863 I was stationed at Hudson City, where I became 
acquainted with a devoted sister, Mrs. S. L. Coon, who, at 
once, introduced the subject of holiness, asking me- "if I 
felt that the blood of Jesus cleansed me from all unright- 
eousness." To which I replied. "I did not." She then 
said, "How can you preach a whole Saviour until you are 
wholly saved." These words pierced my heart like a dag- 
ger, and I, at once, felt the need of being wholly saved or 
sanctified to God. But, being xmwilling to comply with 
the conditions necessary to the reception of the blessing, 
or, in other words, to slay my Isaacs, and cast away my 
idols and garment of self-righteousness, I continued to 
grovel in darkness, attempting to score and hew to the line. 
I received in this condition most of the chips in my own 
face. I continued, however, to labor against wind and 
tide by moonlight, until the hand of affliction was laid 
heavily upon me, and all hopes of my life was despaired 
of. In the meantime, my faithful Sister C. was pray- 
ing for my recovery. (I shall ever believe that it was in 
answer to that faithful prayer I was restored.) She came 
to my bed-side, saying, " Dear brother, how can we give 
you up? O! yield, and live." I then began to examine 


myself. I was deeply wrought upon by the Divine Spirit 
I began to cry, "Lord, save, or I perish." But Satan was 
not to be turned from his stronghold so easily. He, at once, 
spread before me the riches and honors of earth, saying, 
" all this I will give thee, if thou wilt fall down, and wor- 
ship me." I heeded him not, but cried unto God to save 
me from all unrighteousness, and after three days and 
nights of painful struggle, I did what I should have done 
in so many minutes, I believed in the Lord Jesus Christ, 
and was made every whit whole. Glory, glory to the 
Lanib. I now promised my blessed Saviour, if I was ever 
permitted to come before my congregation again, I would 
there confess that His blood cleansed me from all sin. 
From that moment I began to recover, and to the surprise 
of my hearers, I was soon permitted to appear before them 
again. Now came the trying hour, I was in the presence 
of some persons I knew were opposed to this doctrine. I 
did not want to offend them ; they were my dear friends, 
my supporters, the pillars in the Church. I began to think 
how I could let the people know what Jesus bad done for 
me, in such a way as not to give ofience to any. My soul 
was full of glory and of God. Hallelujah ! I felt like 
shouting, but I thought that would not sound well in such 
a fashionable congregation, so I grieved the Spirit, but 
rose to tell what Jesus had done, and fearing man more 
than God, I threw a vail over the face of my Saviour, lest 
His glory would dazzle the eyes of some of my friends. In 
a moment, a vail of thick darkness enveloped my soul, and 
I was left almost speechless before the people. On dis- 
missing my congregation, I retired to my study, I fell upon 
my knees, and wept ; imploring salvation, but not receiv- 
ing, I soon became discouraged, and gave over the strug- 
gle. In that condition I continued to preach, until August 
16, 1867. My health being impaired, I sought a more 
Southern clime. 

REV. A. B. SMITH. 305 

June 1, 1867, 1 left the Northwest for the State of 
Maryland, where I have been laboring since July 1, 1867. 
August 11,1 attended a camp-meeting, at Laytonsville. At 
night, preached from Matthew v. 8, "Blessed are the pure 
in heart, for they shall see God." While preaching I was 
deeply convicted again for the blessing. I was so deeply 
wrought upon, that I could not remain upon the ground. 
On Tuesday morning I left for my home, fully resolved 
never to preach again, until the blood of Jesus cleansed 
me from all sin. I continued in agonizing prayer until 
Friday night. Just before retiring, I was enabled to make 
a full consecration of all to God. I felt a sweet peace 
come over my soul, filled with glory and with God, and, 
in the language of the poet, I could say, 

" I, too, with Thee, shall walk in wliite ; 

With all Thy saints sliall prove ; 
The length, and depth, and breadth, and heiglitli, 
Of everlasting love." 

The same day I returned to the camp-ground ; listened 
to a discourse from. Brother J. W. Hoover of Washington, 
D. C., which was truly a feast to my soul. I was invited to 
close by exhortation. I gladly accepted, as it gave me an 
opportunity to teU what Jesus had done for my soul. I told 
them I felt the blood of Jesus cleansed me from all sin. 
While thus confessing the blessing, a shower of divine 
grace descended upon my heart, spreading its influence 
over the congregation, whose hearts melted into tenderness, 
and then* eyes into tears. Hallelujah ! Praise the Lord, 
oh, my soul ! was the language of many hearts. At night 
I preached from the following, "Oh, that thou hadst 
hearkened to my commandments, then had thy peace been 
as a river, and thy righteousness as the waves of the sea." 
Isaiah Ixvii. 18. From that time to this my peace has 
been as a river. To God be all the glory ! 



N the year 1855 I was led to the Saviour, and 
received the forgiveness of sins. The instru- 
ments in my conversion were my Sabbath- 
school teacher and my devoted father. 
The year following I was led to discover that I needed 
a greater blessing than I had as yet obtained. I longed to 
be made perfect in love. I was brought more forcibly to 
see my need of a deeper work of grace from the hearing 
of a sermon preached by Rev. N. E. Cobleigh, D. D., the 
former editor of "Zion's Herald." I shall always believe 
that T did, at that time, experience the blessing of sanctifi- 
cation ; but it was soon lost, and nearly .forgotten. Since 
then my life has been very wavering. I have never 
entirely backslidden, nor have I ever felt a disposition to 
give up the struggle against "the world, the flesh, and the 
devil ;" but there have been " fightings without, and fears 
within ;" temptations strong, which have often overcome ; 
and my life to me, at least, was a standing proof that the 
roots of sin remained within me. Oh, how many, many 
times have I panted for the "living streams," for some- 
thing which I had not ! 

"When I was first converted, I felt it a duty to proclaim 


Christ in the capacity of a minister of the Gospel. Having 
emigrated to Illinois, I promised God, among strangers, to 
serve Him more faithfully. At the age of seventeen, I 
began to exhort ; about six months afterward I was 
licensed to preach ; and, in six months more, became a 
member of the Illinois Conference, in the bounds of which 
I still labor. Sometimes during my ministry I have had 
much success, and witnessed many conversions to Christ ; 
but I have always felt, even in the midst of revival, that 1 
needed greatly to have inscribed on my banner, " Holiness 
to the Lord." During the past two years, my mind has 
been more exercised on this subject than ever before ; and 
I resolved never to rest satisfied short of its attainment. 

I then sent for " The Guide," and read works on holi- 
ness more than ever before. At one time last year, I 
established weekly meetings especially for the consideration 
of this subject. They were very interesting for a while, 
but failedj for the want of a leader, one who could teach 
experimentally. Having obtained Mrs. Palmer's little 
work on "Entire Devotion," I. sat down to peruse its 
pages, praying that God might make it a blessing to my 
soul. When. I came to the " Covenant," I paused, resolved 
not to cease pleading, until the blessing was obtained. 
Thank God, he heard my prayer. It was proposed imme- 
diately to my mind, " Why not now believe? Have you 
not doubted long enough?" I said, "Lord, I will believe." 

o c * * 

Then again it was suggested, " Do you consecrate all to 
God I" I could not but answer, aud understandingly too. 
" Yea, Lord, all" " Do you now believe God has accepted 
the sacrifice 1 ?" was again suggested. I said, "Lord, Thou 
hast promised to accept : how can I disbelieve Thy word ? 
for Thou never didst deceive me." Again the Spirit 
prompted, " Will you believe without the sensible emotions' 
being given f "Yea, Lord," I cried; "I take Thee at 
Thy word : Thou hast said Thou wilt accept. I do believe 


I ain accepted, and leave it to Thy own good pleasure 
when to givetlie evidence." Oh, then, what a sweet peace 
came over my soul ! I realized that God had accepted me, 
and that all was well, whether any other evidence was 
given or not. God was not long in giving me the full 
assurance that I was entirely His. I sat down to copy the 
" Covenant" in my diary; resolved to make it my own as 
far as it conformed to my circumstances. When I was 
writing these to me ever-memorable words, "My body I 
lay upon Thy altar, O Lord ! that it may be a temple of 
the Holy Spirit to dwell in ; from henceforth I rely upon 
Thy promise, that Thou wilt live and walk in me ; believ- 
ing as I now surrender myself," God broke in, like a flood, 
upon my soul, and heavenly joy rested down upon me. 
Glory be to God ! 

" Oil, liappy bond that sealed my vows 
To Him wlio merits all ray love !" 

God blesses me daily. It is now over seven weeks 
since I was made the recipient of this great blessing. I 
can truly say, not a cloud doth arise between me and my 
God. The devil tempts me sorely ; but 1 have no disposi- 
tion to yield; his darts He harmless at my feet. May God 
keep me in such perfect peace ! and He will so long as my 
mind is stayed on Him. Oh, that my dear people here in 
this fold might receive the like precious gift ! 



HE influence of the Holy Spirit, and the convic- 
tion that I was called to preach the Gospel. 
are among the earliest recollections of my life. 
Receiving the truth from my parents in infancy, 
I had a consciousness of acceptance with God during all 
the years of my childhood, except at short intervals, when 
convinced of sin, and reproved by the Spirit ; which, being 
followed by repentance and faith, restored me to favor 


At the age of thirteen, I made a public profession of 
religion, by uniting with the Church, and, from that time, 
until my seventeenth year, maintained a Christian charac- 
ter before the world, but was sometimes under condemna- 
tion, from departures both in spirit and in practice. I 
always desired to be released from the work of the minis- 
try; "but, being then more urgently pressed in spirit, I 
vowed, that, when the fullness- of time should come, I 
would obey the call. About the same time, I began to go 
into society, and, during the following year, gradually 
wielded to temptation, withdrew from the Church, and for 
two years indulged in the follies and vices of the world. 
The Spirit appeared to be so entirely withdrawn, that, 
while I sinned against light and knowledge, it was without 


remorse. In considering this, it became evident that I 
should never again be moved by the Holy Ghost, until 
from a conviction of duty only, I returned to do my first 
works over. I began, at once, by coming out from the 
world, and being separate, and touching not the unclean 
thing, believing the promise, " I will receive you ;" but, for 
two years subsequently, I found neither delight in the 
things of God, nor communion with Him. For many 
months, I endured the most terrible spiritual conflicts of 
my life, being so frequently overcome that I loathed myself 
in dust and ashes ; but God, who is rich in mercy, had 
compassion upon me, and rebuked the adversary. 

On one occasion, while enjoying sweet communion with 
Him, the thought arose, Why might not this be my con- 
tinual experience? I had no previous knowledge of a 
higher state of grace, or the name by which it was called; 
yet I longed for purity of heart with an intense longing. 
Then came an almost overwhelming revelation of my deep 
depravity. Compared with past experience, I saw, as with 
microscopic vision, the exceeding sinfulness of sin. I could 
not contemplate my greater sins ; and what had once been 
considered trifles appeared in their true light. These trifles 
were the idols which prevented a perfect consummation ; 
but one by one they fell, till the sacrifice was complete. In 
reading "Faith and its Effects," the declaration, "Whatso- 
ever is not of faith is sin," was so presented, that I began 
tc believe. Simultaneously a little ray of bright light 
descended from above, and rested upon me ; and I felt the 
witness of the Spirit that I had believed unto the saving of 
the soul. I continued to read ; and the thought was sug- 
gested, that so simple an occurence would soon pass away, 
and be forgotten ; but my faith failed not, and I was 
enabled to witness a good confession before many 

My vow to preach the Gospel had ever been held 


sacred ; the fullness of time had come, and having obtained 
help of God, I continue to this day. Greater conflicts 
came with greater power, and my faith was tried " as gold 
tried with fire," "as silver tried in a furnace of earth, 
purified seven times." 

Having lived for a season, without the slightest cause 
of condemnation, I began to rest with satisfaction in the 
fact that, touching the law, I was blameless ; and when it 
was difficult to judge whether the spirit had yielded, in any 
degree, to temptation, the tendency was to establish my 
own righteousness ; but the Spirit taught me to say, with 
Paul, when speaking of his own righteousness, "Those 
things which were gain to me, them I counted loss, that I 
might win Christ and be found of Him ; not having mine 
own righteousness, which is of the law, but that which is 
through the" faith of Christ, the righteousness which is of God 
ly faith" What an apprehension of the fullness of the 
atonement followed ! what a joy in realizing that we are 
accepted in the "Beloved!" 

In connection with this, another truth was developed, 
contained in the sixth, seventh, and eighth chapters of 
Eomans, that during the term of his natural life, and in 
whatever state of grace, the Christian has a redeemed spirit 
dwelling in a" body impaired by the fall. The spirit is 
changed when converted, and perfected when sanctified; 
but the body remains the same, and the law in our members 
still warreth against the soul. Though the conflict ceases 
at death, because of separation from the body, yet it will 
not be changed until " the day of redemption," when " this 
mortal shall put on immortality" In this fact, we find our 
susceptibility to temptation, and liability to fall, the' neces- 
sity of "walking in the spirit, that we may not fulfill the 
lusts of the flesh," of " crucifying the flesh with its affec- 
tions and lusts," of " bringing the body under, and keeping 
it in subjection." It is from this cause, also, that . " we, 


who have received the first fruits of the Spirit, even we 
groan within ourselves, waiting for the adoption ; to wit, 
the redemption of the body;" and it is in this sense "we are 
saved by hope." 

The knowledge of these great truths reconciled many 
difficulties which had arisen in my own mind, as well as in 
the minds of others ; but it led me to despair of being able 
always to " walk in the Spirit," and " to keep the body in 
subjection," unto the coming of the Lord Jesus, without a 
direct scriptural assurance that this is possible. Such an 
assurance is given in Romans eighth and fourteenth, " But 
if the Spirit of Him that raised up Jesus dwell in you, He 
that raised up Christ from the dead shah" also quicken your 
mortal bodies by His Spirit that dwelleth in you" It is also 
written in Romans sixth and fourteenth, " Sin shall have 
no dominion over you ; for ye are not under the law, but 
under grace" And again it is written, 1 Thess. v. 23, 24, 
" And the very God of peace sanctify you wholly ; and I 
pray G-od your whole spirit and soul and body be preserved 
blameless unto the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ. Faith- 
ful is He that calleth you, who also will do it." 

With these " precious promises," the last question is 
answered, the last shadow vauisheth away; and I, this 
day, "join myself unto the Lord in a perpetual covenant 
that shall not be forgotten," presenting my body " a living 
sacrifice, holy, acceptable to God, which is my reasonable 
service;" " For I know in whom I have believed, and ana 
persuaded that He is able to keep that which I have com 
initted unto Him, against that day." 



T a camp-meeting, held at Northport, L. L, A. D. 
1850, I was deeply under the power of the 
Holy Spirit. The past and the future were 
before me. My mind was marvelously illu- 
mined. I saw my position I saw what was duty, and 
what it would cost to do that duty, and this .occasioned a 
wonderful struggle. Duty stern, inexorable duty, stood 
before me, like the angel of the Lord before the dumb beast 
of the old prophet. And there was no more head-way in 
that direction, until I should yield to its high and imperious * 
claims. On the other hand, I thought of my position, 
social, religious, and professional. Schemes of cherished 
ambition were before me. The loss of social status the 
opinions of men the humiliation the crucifixion. 

I hesitated I struggled I wept T prayed. The 
word of God was ringing in my ears, " If any man draw 
back, my soul shall have no pleasure in him." New light, 
more effulgent than I had ever had before, now shining 
upon my spirit ; and, now, to recede, was tc lose, even my 
evidence of justification. I was conscious* that I could not 
retain my sense of adoption before God, unless I moved 
forward whither the pillar of fire would lead me. 

But, still my timid nature stood palsied before the con- 
viction, that, if I went forward, it would become my duty 
to preach, and this was the point of crucifixion. To do 
this was seeming death, to all my cherished plans, and I 
shrunk back from it, as from a frightful spectre. And, 


thus, my agonized spirit vibrated between these conflicting 
emotions. Those, only, who have passed through similar 
experiences, can imagine the fierceness of such a conflict. 
In this state of unrest I continued for some hours, while o 
voice seemed to be speaking to me interrogatively, "Will 
you?" "will you?" Subsequently, while this struggle 
was pending, and before I could achieve a decision, my 

good friends, Dr. and Mrs. P , whose sympathies were 

deeply enlisted in my behalf, were frequently present, 
affording me most valuable aid and assistance. Eut with 
a spiritual perception, which greatly astonished me at the 
time, Sister P seemed to comprehend the Avhole mat- 
ter, and without any utterance on my part, as to the real 
difficulty in the case, she seemed to perceive it, and to my 
creat astonishment, suggested her conviction, that I was 
contending against my duty to preach the Gospel. This 
Deemed to me the more remarkable, as I was an entire 
stranger to her, and she could not have known my pre- 
vious history. Was it not an illustration of the words, 
" For the Spirit searcheth all things, yea, the deep things 
of God." 

That it was a time of great spiritual illumination with 
me, is true, beyond ah 1 question. For I felt that "the 
Spirit of the Lord God was upon me." Visions of God 
were open before me and I saw, what subsequent experi- 
ence has verified, as, in a dark and cloudy night, a man 
sees the whole landscape before him in the light of a vivid 
flash of electricity. My soul was stirred to its profoundcst 
depths. I was passing through agonizing throes prepara- 
tory to an entire crucifixion to the world, flesh and sin. 
And blessed be the Lord God of Israel. I was subseqently 
ushered into a new world, of light and beaut} 1 -. 

It was a memorable crisis in my religious history a new 
era was opening upon me. And I felt assured that my 
destiny, for the future, was swinging upon this strongly 

REV. DR. A. HILL. 315 

marked pivotal period of my life. I was to come forth 
from this furnace purged of the " old leaven,"' and enter 
upon a new, and more glorious phase of -spiritual life, or 
lapse back under the displeasure of God, with the midnight 
of darkness upon my soul. And, thus, for hours I swung 
between these startling alternations, unable to decide the 
case, or resolve the' question, " Will you yield, and preach 
the Gospel?" 

After hours of fruitless struggling and most painful in- 
decision, as if in marvelous condescension to my weakness, 
the blessed Christ seemed to speak to me thus, " Twenty- 
one years ago, you gave yourself to me, and I have kept 
you. Now, will you not consecrate yourself, in a higher 
sense, to be forever, and unconditionally, the Lord's; and 
I will keep you unto life eternal?" I recognized the voice 
of the Beloved my soul melted my opposition gave way 
tremblingly, and with a full heart, I responded, " Yes, 
Lord. I must Jiave Thee at all hazards" And the great 
conflict was over. 

In all this I saw no form but I knew that Jesus spoke 
to me. I felt that my commission was from Him, and that 
in due time, the Church would conform its action to these 
requirements, and such has been the fact. I ai'ose from 
this agony with these words impressed upon my mind, 
"Henceforth reckon ye yourselves to be dead, indeed, unto 
sin, but alive unto God, through our Lord Jesus Christ." 
No joyous transport followed this struggle as an immediate 
result no absolute conviction filled my soul, that I had 
experienced the work of entire sanctification, save only in 
the sense of entire consecration. But I began to " reckon 
myself dead, indeed, unto sin, and alive unto God, through 
our Lord Jesus Christ." And thus, to " know Him, and 
the power of His resurrection, being made conformable 
unto His death." 

That such is the work of holiness, I have no doubt 


The work of the Spirit upon individuals must needs be 
somewhat peculiar, as it does not destroy individuality. I 
am not, therefore, disposed to doubt that this was a genu- 
ine work of holiness, because I was not carried away with 
unspeakable transports. My spirit was wonderfully chas- 
tened love divine, heavenly love, sweet, pure, God-like, 
seemed gradually to sweep my whole being. 

Since that period, "purity " has been invested with a 
new and delightful significance. It has been to me, also, 
an endowment ef power. Of this, I have been as conscious, 
as of anything pertaining to my spiritual life. It has "been 
"a place of broad rivers and streams," a "wealthy 
place," an enlargement of soul, an expansion of all the 
moral powers a clearer perception of God's wonderful 
revelation to mankind, and a deeper sympathy with Christ 
in His matchless mission pf love to our lost and fallen race. 
A shrinking back from the touch of sin, and a real love of 
holiness has marked and characterized this experience. It 
seems more emphatically, the implantation in the heart of 
" the Spirit of Truth." Affording an instinctive apprecia- 
tion of truth, wherever and however presented. And an 
ardent love for the truth, because it is truth. 

Holiness brings the soul into light clear, beautiful, 
heavenly light, in which many dark shadows are chased ' 
away, and to the advancing one " it shineth more and more 
to the perfect day." It is not all transport, but it is peace, 
serene and heaven-born. It is not exemption from trial, 
sore, and sometimes perplexing, but it is power to over- 
come " through "the .blood of the Lamb." It is the "suffi- 
cent grace." I have not always retained a clear and satis- 
factory evidence of " entire sanctincation," since the mem- 
orable period referred to, but in the main I have been 
marvelously sustained by the power of the indwelling 
Spirit. And still I am pressing forward, with a good 
hope, under the conscious smiles of my adorable Master. 



HROUG-H the forbearance and loving-kindness 
of a compassionate Saviour, I have at length 
entered upon a new era, having ended my 
course of wandering in the wilderness of un- 
belief, where I journeyed forty years. I was told by friends 
that it was unbelief that was preventing me from obtaining 
the blessing of holiness, and I now freely acknowledge that 
they were assuredly correct. Oh, how much I have lost 
by being fettered by that sin all the way in my pilgrimage, 
though sometimes in sight of the promised land! But 
thanks be to God, who giveth the victory, He has enabled 
me to believe. I do believe the sure word of God; and, 
in believing, a blessing a blessing whose value eternity 
alone can reveal has been granted me. 

Over forty years ago, the regenerating grace of God 
came to my benighted heart ; and, through its illuminina- 
ting light, I was enabled to see the goodness and justice of 
God, and to bless His name for the great and glorious 
plan of salvation ; and, while dwelling on it, I became 
exceedingly happy. I did not at once suppose it was the 
blessed religion, which I had been seeking for with a 
sorrowful heart for many weeks, and that the life I should 
live, should be through faith on the Son of God. 


The subtile adversary of my soul took advantage of 
the change that had come over me, by saying that I had 
lost my conviction, and consequently there was now no 
hope in my case. I at once turned my attention from God 
to myself, and found my conviction was gone, and readily 
admitted the suggestion that there was no hope in my case. 
With ah 1 my heart I began to pray for a return of convic- 
tion, and continued to pray for it, until I became filled 
with doubts and unbelief; and I was given to feel, that 
Deut. xxxii. 20, expressed my condition : " I will hide my 
face from them ; I will see what their end shall be ; for 
they are a very forward generation, children in whom is 
no faith;" 

Now, like David, I want to say, " Come near, all ye 
that fear the Lord, and I will tell you what he hath done 
for my soul." Glory be to His holy name, notwithstanding 
all my frowardness, and want of faith, the Lord, accord- 
ing to His abundant mercy, on the 14th day of last March, 
opened a door of faith, and enabled me to be obedient to 
faith, and I have received grace for obedience, and am 
bound to give thanks always unto God, because He has 
chosen me to salvation through sanctification of the Spirit, 
and belief of the truth. Glory, glory for the blessed word 
of truth which has made me free, free indeed ! Bless the 
Lord ! Blessed be the name of the Lord from this time 
henceforth and forevermore ! for He has so enlightened my 
mind as to enable me to see the mountain of unbelief that 
has been between Him and my soul. 

" The Lord spake unto Moses and Aaron because you 
believed me not, to sanctify me in the eyes of the children 
of Israel : therefore ye shall not bring this congregation 
into the land which I have given them." How could I 
enter into the promised land whilst filled with unbelief? I 
read in the Bible, " Without holiness, no man shall see the 
LcrJ." I felt the need of it, and that I must have it ; and 


besought God to impart it unto me. I would consecrate 
and consecrate and re-consecrate, but would not believe. I 
durst not believe, lest I should believe short of the bless- 
ing, and thereby fail of obtaining the promised grace. 

Precious passages of Scripture would, from time to 
time, be powerfully impressed upon my mind by the Holy 
Spirit ; but I was afraid to accept them as mine. At 
length the passage came, " I have a baptism to be baptized 
with ; and how am I straightened until it be accomplished !" 
That I felt was most assuredly mine, and accepted it at 
once. And whilst I was going to God with it in my 
behalf, the passage loomed up before me, that Christ did 
not many mighty works in Capernaum because of their 
unbelief. I pondered in my mind, "Because of unbelief" 
Christ did not many works : and inquired, Is it even so 
that Christ does not sanctify me because of xmbelief ? 
Then I said, O fool, and slow of heart to believe ! and 
marveled because of my unbelief, and upbraided myself 
with it, and concluded I would no longer stagger through 
unbelief, but believe, and ask God to help my unbelief, 
and compassionate the case of one whom Satan had bound 
these many years with an evil heart of unbelief, in depart- 
ing from the living God, so that I could not enter into His 
rest. If I would not believe, surely I should not be estab- 
lished. Christ came a light into the world, that whosoever 
believeth on Him shall not abide in darkness, but have the 
light of life. 

Then the words came with power to my heart, that, 
whilst I had the light, I must believe in the light, that I 
might be a child of light. I DID believe. Thanks be unto 
God for His enlightening Spirit!. Then again the word 
came with power and . sweetness, "Unto you who believe, 
Christ is precious." Yes, I replied, He is precious, 
supremely precious, and a Saviour especially unto them 
that believe, and " the end of the law for righteousness tc 


every one that believeth." "I had fainted unless I had 
believed to see the salvation of God." And " I am not 
ashamed ; for I know in whom I have believed, and am 
persuaded He is ahle to keep that which I committed to 
His trust." 

Having, therefore, boldness to enter into the holiest 
through the blood of Jesus, by a new and living way which 
He hath consecrated for us through the veil, that is to say, 
His flesh, I am asking that I may ever draw near with a 
true heart, in full assurance of faith, having my heart 
sprinkled from an evil conscience, and my body washed 
with pure water, and to be "sealed with that Holy Spirit 
of promise ; " and that I may be nourished up in the words 
of faith and of good doctrine, wliereunto I have attained ; 
and that the God of hope may fill me with all joy and 
peace in believing, that I may abound in hope through the 
power of the Holy Ghost. 

I am not my own, but the Lord's ; and my soul shall 
make her boast in the Lord : the humble shall: hear thereof, 
and be glad. By the help of the Lord, I intend to hold 
fast a good profession of my faith without wavering ; for 
He is faithful who has promised. I am not ashamed of the 
gospel of Christ ; for it is the power of God unto salvation 
to every one that believeth : for therein is the righteousness 
of God revealed from faith to faith; as it is written, 
" The just shall live v by faith." May I be obedient to the 
faith, established in the faith, and, like Stephen and Barna- 
bas, be full of faith and the Holy Ghost ! May I be able to 
comfort them who are in any trouble, by the comfort 
wherewith I am comforted of God ! for, as the sufferings 
abounded in me, so my consolation aboundeth by Christ, 
who delivered me from mv great and sore trouble, and 
doth deliver ; in whom I trust He will yet deliver me. 



Y parents were very strict with, regard to family 
government. I was required to go to school 
and to church and to Sabbath-school. From 
my earliest recollection the FAMILY ALTAR wag 
never permitted to go dowi. , HERE I received my first 
convictions of sin, and desired to be a Christian, and even 
resolved I would be, when old enough. I attended pro- 
tracted meetings from, time to time, and would feel the 
power of the truths preached ; WISHED SOME ONE AVOULD 
NOTICE ME and INVITE me to seek religion; but none 
seemed to observe me, although the great deep of my 
heart was broken up, and my eyes were a "fountain of 
tears." I lived unsaved until the nineteenth year of my 
age, when, under the labors of Eev. "W. E. Irvine, I was 
awakened and converted to God. Very soon I was urged 
to seek purity of heart, consequently saw and felt the need 
of having the remains of the carnal mind, all in-being sin, 
taken out of my heart. I sought and obtained the bless- 
ing. For some time lived a holy life. Unfortunately for 
me I fell from this state, and thus dishonored the cause of 
Christ. Like thousands of others I was considered a mem- 
ber in good standing, held local preacher's license, and had 
traveled for some months under the elder. When I saw 
my condition I was very far from GOD. 


A camp-meeting was held in the place where I was 
boarding, which I attended. The light shone upon niy 
heart ; I saw my state, and had no rest in my mind until 
I resolved to get right. I sought an opportunity to make 
my confession, and when this was done, I felt God smiled 
approbation, and I was justified by faith. I again saw 
if I would retain the favor of God I must seek 
purity ; I resolved never to eat, drink, "or sleep until I was 
fully saved. It pleased God to cut the work short, and 
again my heart was washed by the " blood of Jesus." 

For two years I have been preaching in connection 
with His Church. I would not boast, but I have to-day a 
better understanding concerning the way and plan of sal- 
vation than ever, light shines, and Jesus gives me grace 
to walk in it. For two years I have enjoyed this blessing, 
have had a clear witness that the blood of Jesus cleanses 
from all sin. HALLELUJAH! I am trying to preach, 
EXPLICITLY, the doctrine of holiness, as taught in the 
Bible, and by our standard authors.* God blesses me in pre - 
senting the truth as it is in Jesus. I take the whole 
Bible; the promises are all mine. Hallelujah! God 
helps me to prosecute an aggressive war against the enemy 
of all unrighteousness. Souls are being converted and 
sanctified, and I have resolved in Jesus' name never to 
leave a circuit without fruit. 

the head of Christian perfection. If you speak only FAINTLY and INDIBECTLY, 
none will be offended and none profited. But, if you speak out, although 


GOD unto salvation." 



ELIEVING that in more than one sense it is 
true, that there is that which scattereth and 
yet increaseth, and there is that which with- 
holdeth more than is meat, and it tendeth to 
poverty ; I write my Christian experience. 

I was converted in the year 1842, when I was but 
seventeen years of age. Soon after, I felt called to preach, 
but refused -positively persistently refused, for many 
years, to obey the call. My natural timidity, together with 
my PRIDE prevented me from obeying God in this direction. 
None of my family or relations of any kind, save an 
uncle, whom I never saw but once were Methodists. All 
of my old associates, neighbors and friends, were in 
sympathy, or association, with other branches of the Chris- 
tian Church. I had given my name to the M. E. Church, 
lived a tolerably consistent life, and to "come out" and 
separate myself from the world more fully aye to be a 
Methodist Preacher, seemed to be a duty which,! had not 
the gracious disposition, or a sufficient amount of grace to 
perform. What now ! in the midst of my rebellion against 
God, I was afflicted. (" Thy people shall be willing in 
the day of Thy power.") In my affliction I consented to 
do my duty. And soon after, in the Providence of God, 
I was licensed to preach. I felt now, greatly, my want 
of fitness for the work assigned me by the Church. And 
the cry, Oh, my leanness ! oh, my unworthiness ! oh, for 
power ! power ! was constantly on my lips. 

At this juncture of my religious experience while an 
old friend and sister in Christ, in a public prayer-meeting, 



was pleading with God for the blessing of a clean heart, 
or " Perfect Love," the Spirit of God convinced me that I 
ought not to rest satisfied short of this Messing. Indeed, 
that was what I needed. I wept, prayed, and "fasted 
often" until at length, in answer to the prayer of faith, the 
blessing came to my heart gentle as the morning light 
peaceful as a dove. My mind became as calm as a " sum- 
mer evening ; " and I could exclaim ! 

" 'Tis done ! tliou dost this moment save 

Witli full salvation bless, 
Redemption through, tliy blood I have, 
And spotless love and peace." 

Soon after, in a love-feast, while the congregation were 

" Am I a soldier of the cross, &c.," 

I was induced to arise, and for the first time to make pro- 
fession of the blessing received. I did so amid the shouts 
of my brethren and sisters in Christ. That was about 
twenty years ago, and the way has been growing brighter 
ever since. I can say truly, "His ways are ways of 
pleasantness, and all His paths are peace. 



OBTAINED religion Aug.- 23, 1823 ; and was 
as happy, I think, as any one could be without 
being wholly sanctified. I was on the mount 
continually, happy day and night. It was my 
whole soul's intent to do the will of God, to bear the cross, 

REV. C. J. EIGHMAN. 325 

to exhort sinners, and tell of the loving-kindness of God to 
all as I had opportunity. 

" Jesus all the day long 
Was my joy and my song;" 

and, oh, how I longed for all His salvation to see ! 

But, after a while, I found I had got some fighting to 
do, as well as shouting. I had many conflicts with the 
enemy. Pie would often tell me, " You have no religion." 
My faith would sometimes waver a little ; but I would 
pray the more earnestly. I believed it was my privilege 
to know always that I was . in favor with God, to have 
an abiding witness of my acceptance. I was convinced 
the great blessing of perfect love was attainable. 

I lived in this state about two years, when I attended 
a Camp-meeting near Blackwood Town, where I was 
powerfully convinced that I must be cleansed from all sin. 
This became the burden of my prayer, and for six weeks 
I prayed almost day and night that God would cleanse me 
and make me holy. I never doubted one moment but what 
the blessing was in store for me ; for God has said, " Be 
ye holy," and He will never withhold grace, to do what 
He requires of us. 

I prayed on. The more I prayed, the brighter it 
looked. The stronger my faith, the happier I became, 
until at length I was convinced that God had cleansed me 
from all sin. My soul was let into the clear light, life, and 
fullness of Christ my Lord, Glory to God ! forty-one years 
I have been drinking at the fountain-head. I have enjoyed 
a fullness of Christ continually. As a local preacher, I 
have been striving to work for God according to my 
ability, until my lungs are worn out. I am broken down, 
old, and feeble ; but it's all glory. Oh, how it does rejoice 
my heart to know that holiness is spreading. May it, like 
a flood-tide, roll on, and roll on, until the world shall bo 
filled with the glory of God ! 



HE language of Mr. Payson is the language of 
my heart: "Were I to adopt the figurative 
language of Bunyan, I might date this letter 
from the land of Beulah, of which I have been, 
since eight o'clock, A. M., yesterday, ' a happy inhabitant.' 
The celestial city is full in my view : its glories beam- upon 
me, its breezes fan me, its odors are wafted to me, its 
sounds strike upon my ears, and its spirit is breathed into 
my heart. The Sun of Eighteousness has been gradually 
drawing nearer and nearer, appearing larger and brighter 
as He approached ; and now He fills the whole hemisphere 
of my soul. A single heart and a single tongue seem altogether 
inadequate to my wants. I want a whole heart for every sep- 
arate emotion, and a whole tongue to express that emotion." 
I now know and feel the blood applied that purifies my 
heart. Just at the close of family prayer, the streams of 
salvation began to pour into my soul, filling me to the brim. 
I went to church under the influence of this mighty bap- 
tism, and preached. A young married lady was saved 
during the services, met in class and joined the church. I 
gave my testimony for God in the class-meeting, and 
returned home. Soon after two, P. M., while reclining on 
the sofa, the flood-gates were again let loose upon me ; and 
for the most of the time, till five, P. M., it seemed that 
my soul would burst. I never before felt the force of that 
Scripture, "Pressed doivn, shaken togetJier, and running 
over" Such filling and enlargement, enlargement and 
filling, I never realized previous to this.. I thought of the 
time when Fletcher was so filled that he said, " Lord, stay 
Thy hand." I think this is the anointing that will abide. My 
brethren in the ministry must not delay getting this baptism- 

HEV. D. N. MULLEE. 327 

I cannot find words to express what God has done and 
is doing for me. I feel very little like shouting: the 
current is too broad and deep for that. Oh ! this sinking 
into God's will, this pressure of grace, is beyond every- 
thing I had hoped for. It seems that God is crowding 
salvation into my soul, and by this process expanding it. 
I feel something of that " awe that dares not move, and all 
the silent heaven of love." I cannot doubt longer. "The 
blood of Jesus Christ cleanseth me from all sin." I must 
tell what God has done for me. " Out of the fullness of 
the heart the mouth speaketh ; " and the pen writes, and 
I will make no apology for the strain in which I have 



N August, 1852, by faith I looked out of dark- 
ness and guilt, and claimed Christ as a Saviour. 
In August, 1865, by faith I looked out of 
adoption and childhood, and claimed Jesus as 
a Sanctifier. 

Consciousness of weakness ; unutterable longings for 
deliverance from the bonds of slavish habits and unbelief ; 
yearning for the Will of God to be done in and through 
me, led my soul, by the inspiration of the Spirit, to lay all 
upon the altar and 'with hearty will and all-embracing 
faith, find full salvation in Jesus' blood. My heart says : 

" 'Tis done, Thou clo'st this moment save 
With fall salvation bless, 
Kedemption through Thy blood I have, 
And spotless love and peace." 




SHORT time before I was thirteen years old, I 
was converted to God. I had a clear witness 
of my acceptance, and could sing, "How 
happy are they who their Saviour obey," etc. 
Though young in years, I was able, through grace, to hold 
fast for some time, and proved that " His yoke was easy 
and His burden light." By and by I grew careless and 
indifferent, and fell into sin, and lost all but good desires 
to do right. I never was willing to let go entirely, and 
the church still bore with me. I finally settled down in 
life, and was privileged to attend a meeting where God 
manifested Himself in great power, and I was restored to 
my former position, and soon after licensed to preach. 

I now felt the necessity of a holy life, but blindly sup- 
posed that we gradually grew into perfect Christians, aiid 
when we had accomplished that end, God would say, 
"Enough, come up higher." Thus I lived, struggling to 
keep niy head above water ; rendering this service of my 
soul through fear of punishment, and exhorting others to 
do the same, not knowing that the "Way was so delight- 
ful." Four years of political excitement and bloody con- 
flict, well nigh destroyed all my hopes for heaven. By 
practice, at least, I was saying, that loyalty to niy govern- 
ment was sufficient for the time. I did not neglect the 
form, but the power was lost in my zeal for the- cause in 
which we were engaged. 

I was unhappy, and knew not where to go for relief, 


until it pleased God to " lead me in a way I knew not," 
and at once I' was a seeker of holiness, for the first time 
in my life. I wrote it to my friends ; I told it in the love- 
feast, and by thus committing myself, I was able to hold 
on until I was instructed In the way, for I was ignorant, 
never having heard a sermon preached on the subject ; 
neither had I cared to read about it. The Lord showed 
me that it was not only desirable, but necessary. I turned 
with a heavy heart away from the burial of our beloved 
President, .to seeki the Highway of Holiness. The enemy 
tried very hard to get me to give it up, but I felt that I 
was perishing for the bread of life. I made the consecra- 
tion complete, except tobacco. That I felt I must, but 
could not give up. 

I prayed over it, and finally, on my knees before God, 
I wrote the 'solemn vow, that from that date (May 7th, 
1865,) I would never, in any form, take it again. My 
mind was then relieved, and the next evening, while bow- 
ing at the altar, light came. Glory to God 1 I was washed 
and made a "new creature in Jesus Christ." Everything 
new ; new desires, new hopes, new aims. Glory to Jesus ! 
I am still in the Highway ; I have the witness within my- 
self. Tobacco has not troubled me ; even the desire to 
take it is gone ; and in addition to being rid of the filthy 
practice, I save twenty-five dollars per annum for the Lord. 
Let him that uses tobacco go and do likewise, and bring the 
money saved to the Lord, and there will be meat in his 
house ; and then see if He will not pour out such a bless- 
ing as " there will not be room to contain." Jesus saves 
me every day, and when temptations come, He helps me, 
and I am happy in God. 

E'er since by faith I saw the stream 

Tliy flowing wounds supply, 
Redeeming love has been my theme, 

And shall be till I die. 



HILE reading the Bible on my knees, the chapter 
for the day was Exodus the twenty-ninth. 
"When I came to the -thirty-seventh verse, my 
attention became unusually arrested : especially 
did the words, " And it shall be an altar most holy : what- 
soever TOUCHETH the ALTAR shall 6c holy" enter my heart, 
and with them a power I do not remember to have felt 
before, when trying to believe " the altar sanctifieth the 
gift." I saw, and I still see, a peculiar force in the words, 
" toucheth the altar" 

Many a time, during these years past, I have conse- 
crated my whole being to the Lord, and felt very happy in 
doing so for a time; but then my heart would grow cold 
again, and would relapse into doubt, and fear, and sin. I 
now see that the fault has been, not in the imperfection of 
my consecration, but in the imperfection, or rather mis- 
direction, of my faith ; looking more to myself, my feelings, 
&c., than to the virtue of the "altar." Now I see, I feel, 
praise the Lord! the "altar," not my feelings, but the 
altar sanctifieth the gift. Yes, the altar, Jesus Christ, He 
is now my sanctification, my all-in-all. Hallelujah, halle- 
lujah ! I believe, I feel, Plis precious blood " cleanseth 
from all sin." 

Twelve years ago, on my way to see my friends in 
Ireland, I called on the author of the "Way of Holiness, 
and she told me to look for and hold this great " salvation 
by faith ; " but never, never did I see or feel the scriptural 
propriety of her kind instructions as I now do. Praisa 

REV. F. OWEN. 331 

the Lord that He has spared me through all my wander- 
ings, up and down, to see this glad day, when Jesus does 
take all my sin and fear away, by believing His word. 
" The altar sanctifieth the gift," the poor, unworthy gift. 
I feel as if I could fill this whole sheet, and many more,, 
by writing this blessed word of the Lord, " The altar sano- 
tifieth the gift." Glory forever to the Lord for this simple 
way, this short way, this glorious way, of salvation ! Surely 
all may come; for the merit of Jesus, the blood of Jesus, 
can save all, can cleanse all. 



AM thirty-eight years old, and have labored in 
the itinerant rants fourteen years. My preach- 
ing was commenced when in the enjoyment of 
FUJ;L SALVATION. I continued in this state for 
some years. For a few years last past, I have lived much 
of the time short of this perfect grace, and at times very 
short of it. Sometime since, I consecrated my all to God 
once more. He accepted the offering. GLORY TO His 
NAME ! From that time all has been peaceful and happy 
within. God has guided me in all matters, in a way to 
astonish me. His hand appears in all that concerns me. 
His whole guidance can be understood only by' those who 
enjoy " like precious faith.' My heart, my life, and my 
preaching, have undergone a material change. Station 

E has a new preacher ! This being my second year 

on the charge, it has troubled me to find something new, 
and interesting for the pulpit, until God brought me into 
this " large place" Plenty of texts and sermons are now 


at hand. Indeed, every text to me seems like a sermon 
of itself. No language can describe my enjoyment for the 
six weeks past. My faith is unwavering. I can now 
endure " as seeingHini who is invisible." 

An attempt to describe the particular guidings of Prov- 
idence, would doubtless subject me to the ridicule of some 
well-meaning people. I will not attempt it. "Acknowl- 
edging God in all my ways," I know He "directs my 
steps." It is no longer a mere theory with me, that " All 
things work together for good to them that love God." 
With the apostle I can say, I " know " this to be so. This 
is living in earnest. " GLORY TO GOD IN THE HIGHEST I " 



ATTENDED the camp-meeting for Newburg 
District, at Warwick. Here I fell in with a 
dear brother in the ministry, whom I knew for 
years past had professed to enjoy the blessing 
of holiness, and whose course I had been led to observe 
somewhat closely. I found this was still his theme, and my 
heart began to hunger and thirst for full redemption in the 
blood of the Lamb. We had some meetings on this sub- 
ject, and were led into great heart-searchings. In one of 
these meetings I was brought to see that I was so far con- 
secrated to Christ as to be willing to be any iking for Him, 
to go any where (z. e., somewhere), to occupy any 
prominent position, or to discharge any great duty. But 
whether I was* willing to be nothing for Christ, was the 
question presented to me for solution ; whether, if He so 


willed and ordered, I was willing to be under the feet of 
my brethren, and kept out of sight, 

" Little and unknown, 
Loved and prized by God alone." 

Here I saw 1 had stumbled, and the question needed some 

After looking the whole ground over, I said, "Yes, 
Lord." I resolved to feel my way very carefully ; and 1 
purposed having a long talk with the brother referred to, 
for his advice and instruction. Bat, oh ! the mercy of God 
in Christ Jesus ! before such an opportunity was afforded, 
and while in a meeting in the old New York Committee 
tent, on Friday evening, September 1, 1865, 1 was brought 
suddenly to see, that all my struggles and delays availed 
nothing, and that my only hope was the merits of Christ 
appropriated by faith. I was enabled, without any par- 
ticular emotion or joyous feeling at the time, to cast myself 
unreservedly upon Christ, and take Him as my present and 
complete Saviour from, all sin. The first sensation was 
that of unspeakable relief, and my first testimony in public 
was that I had entered into the rest of faith. 

And now I dare not attempt any thing like a full 
account of what has followed this simple act of faith in 
Jesus, and the constant trust that I have continued to 
exercise since. I have had victory after victory over 
Satan, and have risen already into an atmosphere hereto- 
fore almost entirely unknown to me. God has favored me 
with some manifestations, that have, for the time, been 
almost overpowering, and led me to doubt whether I was 
in the body or out of the body. I have had seasons of 
great trial also, and called to live solely by faith ; but these, 
have been followed by still more glorious victories, and my 
soul is now rejoicing in the sweet consciousness that the 
Hood of Jesus cleanseth from all unrighteousness. 

I think I have come to see as never before, that the 


strength of the soul, at all times, and in every circum- 
stance, consists in its constant and persistent trust in Christ. 
I have but to look to Jesus, and live. The effect is seen 
all around me ; and I think that I have accomplished 
really more for God, since I received the gift of power, 
than in many years before. To Him be all the glory ! 



PROFESSED the blessing of holiness, preached 
it, endeavored to live it, but had lost the clear 
witness of the Spirit of its present possession; 
still I would confess it, and testify to its truth, 
but I felt in my soul a want of unction that I believe should 
always attend the possession of this grace, and does, as light 
to the sun, and, if not obstructed, will make its power 
known. Late, one night, after retiring from a protracted 
meeting, in which the conflict was even, and the enemy, at 
most, only kept at bay, in reviewing, and endeavoring to 
analyze the effort of the evening, the Spirit of God led me 
to see that my dimness of light was not sufficient, and 
others were in the dark on my account. 1 was led again 
to approach the mercy-seat with a cold, naked faith, per- 
ceiving that I was to be saved by faith, and not by my 
works, even of good desires, wishes, or resolutions ; and, if 
by faith, now was just as appropriate a time as any other 
would be. And, without feeling or emotion of any kind, I 
mentally took the stand. I am now the Lord's, letting go 
of all the past, of neglects, unfaithfulness, etc. I was ena- 
bled to stand upon this truth, "Jesus saves me, for I trust 
Him to save me ;" and from that time my witness returned. 
" To any who have lost the witness, go thou and do likewise. 5 ' 



OON after rny union with the M. E. Church, in 
the year 1804, 1 heard the doctrine of holiness, 
or entire sanctification, preached. I examined 
the Holy Bible for its proof. I soon com- 
menced seeking this higher and holy state. I honestly 
believed it attainable in this life, if ever, as I reasoned, 
" We must have it to enter the kingdom of God above, as 
no unholy thing can enter there ; and there is no work in 
the grave. If death and the grave are to do it, then uni- 

versal salvation must follow, as all must die ; then the 
grave. Hence, if it be ever attainable, it is now 

I sought it with prayers and tears for weeks and 
months. So distressed was my anxious soul for this salva- 
tion at times, sleep departed from me. Finally I resolved 
to retire to the grove, and on my knees continued to 
wrestle with the Holy one, in the name of our prevailing 
Advocate, till he should send down his great salvation. I 
continued in prayer till it appeared to the soul's eye the 
blessing was coming down from the Father of lights as a 
globe, brighter than the sun, or as burnished gold. It 
seemed as large as the hemisphere : but, as it descended, it 
grew less and less in its appearance ; and I thought God 
was condensing it, that I might grasp and embrace the 
whole. Oh, how my youthful heart beat ! It came nearer 
and nearer! But, oh! just as I was laying hold of the 
greatly-desired prize, the thought rushed into my mind, 
" You are too voung, too inexperienced, too unworthy, for 


strength of the soul, at all times, and in every circum- 
stance, consists in its constant and persistent trust in Christ. 
I have but to look to Jesus, and live. The effect is seen 
all around me ; and I think that I have accomplished 
really more for God, since I received the gift of power, 
than in many years before. To Him be all the glory ! 



PEOFESSED the blessing of holiness, preached 
it, endeavored to live it, but had lost the clear 
witness of the Spirit of its present possession ; 
still I would confess it, and testify to its truth, 
but I felt in my soul a want of unction that I believe should 
always attend the possession of this grace, and does, as light 
to the sun, and, if not obstructed, will make its power 
known. Late, one night, after retiring from a protracted 
meeting, in which the conflict was even, and the enemy, at 
most, only kept at bay, in reviewing, and endeavoring to 
analyze the effort of the evening, the Spirit -of God led me 
to see that my dimness of light was not sufficient, and 
others were in the dark on my account. I was led again 
to approach the mercy -seat with a cold, naked faith, per- 
ceiving that I was to be saved by faith, and not by my 
works, even of good desires, wishes, or resolutions ; and, if 
by faith, now was just as appropriate a time as any other 
would be. And, without feeling or emotion of any kind, I 
mentally took the stand. I am now the Lord's, letting go 
of all the past, of neglects, unfaithfulness, etc. I was ena- 
bled to stand upon this truth, " Jesus saves me, for I trust 
Him to save me ;" and from that time my witness returned. 
" To any who have lost the witness, go thou and do likewise. ''" 



OON after my union with the M. E. Church, in 
the year 1804, 1 heard the doctrine of holiness, 
or entire sanctification, preached. I examined 
the Holy Bible for its proof. I soon com- 
menced seeking this higher and holy state. I honestly 
believed it attainable in this life, if ever, as I reasoned, 
"We must have it to enter the kingdom of God above, as 
no unholy thing can enter there ; and there is no work in 
the grave. If death and the grave are to do it, then uni- 
versal salvation must follow, as all must die ; then the 
grave. Hence, if it be ever attainable, it is now 

I sought it with prayers and tears for weeks and 
months. So distressed was my anxious soul for this salva- 
tion at times, sleep departed from me. Finally I resolved 
to retire to the grove, and on my knees continued to 
wrestle with the Holy one, in the name of our prevailing 
Advocate, till he should send down his great salvation. I 
continued in prayer till it appeared to the soul's eye the 
blessing was coming down from the Father of lights as a 
globe, brighter than the sun, or as burnished gold. It 
seemed as large as the hemisphere : but, as it descended, it 
grew less and less in its appearance ; and I thought God 
was condensing it, that I might grasp and embrace the 
whole. Oh, how my youthful heart beat ! It came nearer 
and nearer! But, oh! just as I was laying hold of the 
greatly-desired prize, the thought rushed into my mind, 
" You are too voung, too inexperienced, too unworthy, for 


so great a blessing. It is for older and more experienced 
Christians." And, thus reasoning, the golden opportunity, 
the golden globe of light and love disappeared. I sank to 
the dust in gloom, fear, and doubt. For a long time, if I 
thought about seeking this great blessing, a check would 
come over my feelings : " You might have enjoyed it ; you 
gave away to the enemy, to unbelief!" I believed it 
attainable and absolutely all-important. 

I preached the holy doctrine, and sometimes as though 
I enjoyed it ; as my faith was so firm in its truth, that it 
was easy and pleasant to preach it. I always felt the more 
happy in preaching it, than in enforcing most other Bible 
doctrines. After some years thus spent, I greatly desired 
the abiding witness of its enjoyment. Thanks to God, 
again he enabled me to commence the struggle for this 
blessing ; and again it descended as a globe of light above 
the brightness of the sun, and I was taken up into its cen- 
tre : the earth and sublunary things vanished, and I 
appeared as light as vanity, and God was all in all ; and 
the elementary globe, in the centre of which I seemed to 
be moving, was represented to me as the Deity. As God 
is love, and as I was basking in this globe of love, I cried, 
" I am in God ; and Pie,, by His Spirit, dwells in me. 
Hallelujah ! Glory to the Lamb ! " 

Soon after this glorious manifestation, in which state I 
was as happy as I could be in the earthly tabernacle, I 
met a Christian brother, who, I supposed, knew and 
enjoyed it. From the fullness of my heart, and childlike 
simplicity, I cried in great earnestness, "Dear brother, 
God has sanctified my soul; He has made rue holy." He 
made no reply, and seemed surprised. This threw a 
check on the fervor of my buoyant feelings. I soon gave 
way to the unwise thought, " It may prove a stumbling- 
block to others ; I will try to live in its enjoyment : let my 
life speak for it, preach it as attainable, as a Bible doc- 

KEY. C. S. FOD. ' 337 

trine." For scores of years, I have enjoyed more or less 
of this soul-transforming blessing. 

Recently I have been confined to my bed by illness. 
Glory to my Jesus, my soul has dwelt on Pisgah's mount ! 
On death's brink I have cast the eye of faith : beyond the 
vale, all was bright and glorious. I shall go safe when 
called for, if my faith fail not. 




EN years ago I attended the Reading Camp- 
meeting, and sought God earnestly, but did not 
seem to get that especial blessing for which I 
went. The last night had come, and a good 
sister said to me, " I have staid on the ground longer than T 
woulcl, to hear your testimony that God had saved you from 
all sin." Immediately after that I went into a little 
prayer-meeting, and told the friends, in a very calm manner, 
that I was earnestly seeking, but had no evidence of Divine 
acceptance. A thought came, " I love this Saviour ; " 
and " I love Him with all my heart ; " and something said, 
" Get up and say that : " but it was suggested, " Don't 
say that ; for that would be professing sauctification." 
But two eat beside me that I loved ; and I thought, I can 
say to these, " I believe I do love the Lord with all my 
heart ; " and, as I said it, God wonderfully blessed me, 
and I fell helpless under the great power of God. 

Before this, I had accounted for various unusual 
religious manifestations on natural principles ; that, as 
some persons of a nervous temperament were overcome at 
the sight of unexpected friends, so those who were relig- 
iously afi'ected had weak nerves, and the joy of the Lord 


easily affected them. Of others, I thought it was a, species 
of catalepsy. But, since the time of my own prostration, 
I have not believed that such demonstrations were other 
than the power of God. I went on in the service of the 
Lord, and He kept me in perfect peace. But, after a 
while, I have to confess it, I let go my hold, I scarcely 
know how ; but I did, and lost the power and blessedness 
of that intimate communion which I had with God, though 
I had lived in the enjoyment of it for two or three years. 
Since then, I have lived in a tolerable state of grace, but 
more recently concluded I ought to be living nearer to 
God. I had resolved to put myself in a position where I 
could do more for Jesus ; and Avhether my sermons were 
studied as well or not, I meant to pray more. This I have 
done ; and, with a good brother minister of the Reformed 
Dutch Church, I have often gone to God, and God has 
been with us in power ; and to-day I reckon myself dead 
indeed unto sin, but alive unto God through our Lord 
Jesus Christ. 



HEN twelve years old, God, for the sake of His 
Son, forgave my sins; but, alas! I hung my 
harp upon the willow, and wandered by the 
chilling streams of Babylon, until my nineteenth 
year, when the arms of my Father again encompassed His 

Five years have now passed; and oh, how often has 
my soul longed for that fullness which is found only in the 
Godhead! At times I had a foretaste of heaven; and 

REV. J. N. SHORT. 339 

then those dark clouds of unbelief would rob me of all my 
joy. I sighed for help, but, alas ! it was in vaiit : for I 
knew not how to approach the mercy-seat, and return with 
an answered prayer. 

At times, I felt peace within ; and, for a year and a 
half, I have preached, in feebleness, the gospel of my 
Master. God blessed my labors by giving me souls for my 
hire, which encouraged me to hope and pray on ; which I 
did until the month of October, 1865, at which time I read, 
for the first time, the " Guide to Holiness," Now was my 
soul more dissatisfied than ever, for I tried to preach 
holiness : and how could 1 1 as I knew nothing about it. 
I read the way pointed out in the " Guide," again and 
again, and then would approach the mercy-seat and try to 
believe ; but it seemed in vain ; for I did not ask that the 
work might be done just now. The nineteenth of Novem- 
ber dawned, and was so"Very rainy, that I did not go to 
my appointments. My soul was sad. I repaired to my 
closet ; and, while going, the thought occurred to me, that 
1 might feel the sanctifying power of Jesus' blood just noio 
if I would believe. By faith I beheld that altar all drip- 
ping with hallowed blood. I asked to be cleansed JTJST 
NOW. I felt the waves of that purple flood as they washed 
over my soul ; and, receiving the spirit of holiness, I cried. 
" Abba, Father ! " The Spirit now bore witness with my 
spirit that I was wholly the Lords. 

That aching void within my soul is now filled with 
God; and I can say, "He is mine, and I am His." Oh, 
how simple the way ! to ask in faith, and believe that He 
answers prayer, and accepts the sacrifice of a broken 
heart. The work of the Lord now prospers in my hands. 
Twenty-five have, within a few weeks, sought and found 
pardon in Jesus' blood. The work is going on among the 
people and in my own heart. 



j BOUT three weeks after I was converted, I felt 
the necessity of holiness. I read the Memoirs 
of Mrs. Rogers and Carvosso, and the Path 
of Life, and these books confirmed me in 
the belief that it was my privilege to be made free from 
sin. I prayed earnestly for heart purity, for about one 
week, when I was able to lay all on the altar, and believe 
that the offering was accepted. God then gave me such 
a view of himself and of the power of the gospel, as I 
never had before. I was overwhelmed with the divine 
glory. I did not shout, aloud, but felt 

" The silent awe that dares not move," 

while the iire of God seemed to be penetrating my being. 
I felt lifted above the world, above the cares and sorrows 
of life : peace and joy filled my soul. I felt a power which 
I never felt before power to sing and pray, and work for 
God. I remained in this state of mind for many months, 
during which time I was much exercised on the subject of 
preaching the gospel. I resisted this conviction of duty, 
when almost imperceptibly the witness of holiness was lost. 
Sometime after this I entered the ministry. Years of 
affliction and trials came, during which God often blessed 
me, and showed me the light of His countenance. I passed 
through powerful revivals, and saw many sinners converted 
to God. But in the midst of all this I was conscious of a 
want of holiness. About three years ago I was able to 
consecrate anew. God met me again in a powerful man- 
ner. Since then I have been trying to live holiness and 
preach entire sanctification as a distinct blessing. 



^^ FTER being for some time deeply exercised on 
the subject of Holiness, I one evening took the 
" Way of Holiness," which had that day fallen 
into my hands, and went to a retired room, 
when it occurred to me that I might and ought to stay up 
and make known niy request to God, at least till midnight. 
Nature was averse ; but I had no sooner made up my 
mind to this course than I received new power to seek 
God. Satan harassed me every now and then with evil 
thoughts. I solemnly besought God to aid me, and pleaded 
that, as He had given the desire, it must be His intention 
to bestow the blessing. I acted on the suggestion of Mrs. 
Palmer, to lay the sacrifice on the altar, and I had a new. 
and affecting view of the Christian altar covered with the 
blood of the divine victim. On this altar I placed myself, 
and besought God to take possession of the offering. I 
confessed and felt that I was a sinner, worthy of being 
that moment in the flames of hell, but pleaded "the prec- 
ious blood." 

I besought God to give me some clear and indubitable; 
manifestation, that there might be no further doubt on my 
mind. I expressed myself somewhat as follows, " Lord, 
thou knowest that I shall have to testify for thee, and can- 
not do so confidently if there be a doubt on the mind as to 
che possession of the blessing. Thou knowest my naturally 
doubtful frame of mind. Give me such an inward witness 
that I shall not be able to doubt or mistake." I said a 
great deal more to the Lord, and I thank God He gave 
me "to seek Him with my whole heart" I felt fully coo 


scious of this; and the more I prayed the more I was 
drawn out in prayer. Again and again I laid myself on 
the altar and appealed to God to take possession of the 
offering. I was thus engaged when the Holy Ghost came 
upon me in a gloriously indescribable manner. 

"Words fail to convey to another mind what I then 
experienced. My frame trembled ; the glory surrounded 
me. It was not simply like a manifestation of God to the 
soul, but as if God were visibly present in His glory, and 
as if the divine light penetrated the physical as well as the 
moral nature. Not a doubt remained. The Lord suddenly 
came to His temple. Now I can write most confidently 
and truthfully, that the visitation was such, that it drove 
away all possible doubt, as to the communication of the 
grace which I sought. To doubt was impossible. God, 
the Holy One, had come and possessed me. I trembled 
exceedingly, and for some time I could only ceaselessly 
exclaim, Glory ! Glory ! Glory ! Glory ! and the exclama- 
tion seemed to be involuntary, as if it proceeded from the 
Spirit within me, more than from myself. This was near 
the midnight hour. 

I remember also, before this ever-memorable visitation, 
praying that God would apply some portion of His own 
word to my mind, and these words came with power, 
" Now ye are clean through the word which I have spoken 
unto you." And I said, "What word, Lord?" and the 
answer was, "I will; be thou clean." 

I began to plead for poor sinners, and I hope that God 
will soon save amongst us by scores and hundreds. But 
of this I have no inward assurance, only my cry is, "Lord, 
increase my faith." This memorable fact took place in a 
few days after I arrived at Trowbridge, when appointed 
by the Conference to labor in the Bradford Wilt Circuit. 



HAD tlie inestimable privilege of being blessed 
with pious parents, who taught me to walk in 
the paths of piety and peace. Left early to 
the care of a dear mother (she has been now 
many years in glory), I was taught to fear God, to love 
His word and His messengers, to reverence His Sabbaths, 
to look upon religion as the one thing needful. I loved to 
hear those who spoke of Jesus, and to sing His praises. 
Oh how often did my young heart swell with desire of 
becoming one day a missionary that seemed to me the 
post "par excellence.'" Oh that I could preach Jesus 
when I became a man ! 

In the month of October, 1847, on a Lord's day eve- 
ning, after a searching sermon, I was found, heart broken 
arid almost in despair, at the communion rail, earnestly 
seeking deliverance. There I wept and prayed there I 
tried to believe. The meeting closed, and I left the chapel 
still bearing the load of unpardoned sins. But praise God, 
while on the way home, lifting my heart to God in earnest 
mental prayer, my burden fell off, my chains were broken, 
I felt I was free Jesus was my Saviour. The spot where 
this happened will be ever graven upon my memory. It is 
hallowed ground. There God spoke peace to my soul. 
Praise His name ! With the assurance of salvation, my 
old conviction and desires respecting preaching returned 
with redoubled energy and distinctness. After much 
hesitation and doubt as to my fitness for the work (of the 


call I never had the least doubt), I offered myself as a local 
preacher and was accepted. 

But to be fully set apart to this glorious work was my 
ambition and earnest conviction. Praise the Lord, He 
undertook for me, and after enabling me to surmount 
obstacles and difficulties, He opened my way. I was 
accepted by the Conference and sent as a probationer tc 
the place I now occupy in the Lord's vineyard, as a mis- 
sionary at Jeremie, St. Domingo. 

I began my labors here with a single eye to the honor 
and glory of God, desiring nothing but to please God and 
save souls. I endeavored sincerely to do the Lord's work 
to the best of my ability. But little success seemed to 
reward my toil, and I was driven to look within. I saw 
the need of being holy ; I read and prayed : I strove to 
believe. It was the 14th of December, 1851, encour- 
aged by reading Mrs. Fletcher's life, I laid myself wholly 
upon the altar, and received the assurance that God had 
truly accepted me. I did not confess Jesus before men, 
and therefore lost the blessed assurance. Oh, had I beeii 
wise, my peace might have flowed as a river. I hid my 
treasure, and I lost it. Since that time, as often as I have 
laid myself on the altar, I have received the assurance of 
sanctification, but I have as often lost it, by hiding it from 
God's people. 

The closing services of the last, and the introductory 
ones of the present year, have been seasons of blessing to 
my soul. "Writing in my journal on January 9th, I could 
say I believe I have that perfect love which casteth out 
fear. Still I did not profess it openly. Need I tell you 
by this means I was shorn of my strength ? A few months 
a<ro we received several back numbers of the " Guide to 


Holiness." Bless God for that precious collection of 
testimonies to the cleansing efficacy of Jesus' blood! 1 
love its pages. The papers on holiness are clear and con 


vincing -, but the best part, to my taste, are those simple 
and encouraging experiences of God's sanctified ones. 
Since reading them, I have been afresh stirred up to claim 
a clean heart as mine, and, blessed be God, he has anew 
given me the testimony of His Spirit to the fact. Oh, 
what abounding grace to me, unworthy, unfaithful me ! 

Last Sabbath afternoon I was reading the " Guide,' 
and happened to light upon an experience which in some 
points resembled mine, especially in having obtained often, 
and as often lost the witness, through unwillingness to con 
fess it openly. There and then I determined to lose no time, 
but to state fully and simply what great things God had 
done for me. This Satan would rather not hear, and 
many were his insinuations with the design of frightening 
we from the performance of what I felt was a duty. 

I looked upon the affair as involving my present and 
eternal salvation, and by God's grace, plainly and humbly 
related my experience in the chapel, instead of preaching. 
I do not repent having done so, I believe I never shall. 
Praise the Lord. I am now committed to the doctrine. I 
mean to witness for Christ on all suitable occasions. This 
I see is the only means of retaining the assurance of the 
blessing. I do now feel that I am wholly and unreserv- 
edly the Lord's ; I have given myself fully to Him, and 
that for ever, and I am assured that He has accepted, and 
doth now accept me. Glory to His holy name, He 
has saved me, even such a rebel as me ! I bless God that I 
enjoy a heavenly settled peace; I have a calm and simple 
trust in Jesus as my complete Saviour ; He is my all in 
all. I love Him, and all my desire is to live to show 
forth His praise. 




OD often showed me the importance and neces- 
sity of holiness as clear as a sunbeam. I 
seldom studied the Bible without conviction of 
my fault in not coming up to the scriptural 
standard of salvation. I often commenced seeking the 
blessing, but at no time made much progress, for as I read 
and prayed, some duty was seen to present itself, which I 
was unwilling to perform, and so I passed into indiffer- 

While studying for the ministry with the Eev. William 
Hill of Cambridgeport, Vt., I was frequently led to see 
my need of purity. Brother Hill was an able Presbyterian 
minister, and for a number of years was pastor of a Pres- 
byterian Church in JSTewburgh, N. Y. He became con- 
victed for entire sanctification, through reading the scrip- 
tures, and obtained the blessing, while on a visit to Dr. 
and Mrs. Palmer's, in New York city, where he attended 
the meeting for the promotion of holiness held at their 
house. He lived it, professed it, and preached it. A few 
years since he died hi holy triumph at Bristol, Conn., in 
the thirty-seventh year of his age. The society and 
, influence of this holy man were a great blessing to me. 
More than a hundred times, I pi-esume, have I bowed in 
prayer with him in his study and held sweet communion 
with God. Those seasons of devotion still linger in my 
memory as among the most precious hours of my early 

By being so often convicted of my need of perfect love, 

EEV. J. A. WOOD. 347 

and failing to obtain it, I, after awhile, like many others, 
became a little sceptical in regard to the Wesleyan doctrine 
of entire sanctification as a distinct blessing subsequent to 
regeneration. I had no clear or definite idea in regard to 
the blessing of perfect love, but came to think of it, and 
teach it, as only a deeper work of grace, or a little more 
religion. I taught, as many do, a gradual growth into 
holiness, or modern gradualism. I threw the whole matter 
into the world of indefiniteuess, and of vague generalities. 
I expected to grow into holiness somehow, somewhere, and 
at some time, but knew not how, nor where, nor when. I 
urged believers to seek a deeper work of grace, and to get 
more religion, but seldom said to. them, " Be ye holy," 
" This is the will of G-od, even your sanctification" or seek 
"perfect love." 

I became somewhat prejudiced even against the Bible 
terms, "sanctification" "holiness," "perfection," and dis- 
liked very much to hear persons use them in speaking of 
their experience. I was opposed to the profession of 
holiness as a distinct blessing from regeneration. I became 
prejudiced against the special advocates of holiness ; and 
at Camp-meetings and other places I felt disposed to dis- 
courage direct efforts for its promotion. 

During a number of years this was my state of mind 
and here let me record that while hundreds of sinners 
were converted, in connection with my feeble ministry, I 
do not recollect a single case of a believer being entirely 
sanctified under my labors, during the first nine years of 
my ministry. Let me add, during this time I was grieved 
from year to year, by seeing what might astonish hell, and 
fill heaven with lamentations company after company of 
young converts walking into backslidden and unsanctified 
churches, first to wonder, then for a while to be grieved, 
but finally, to add another layer to the backslidden strat- 


In May I was appointed to the Court Street Church, 
Binghampton. I went there much prejudiced against the 
professors of holiness in that church. I soon found in my 
pastoral visitations that where those persons lived who 
professed the blessing of holiness, there I felt most of the 
divine power and influence. I realized a liberty in prayer 
and an access to God in those families which I did not 
elsewhere. The more 1 became acquainted with them, the 
more I was convicted of my remaining depravity and need 
of being cleansed in the blood of Jesus. 

Through the entire summer of 1858, I was seeking the 
blessing, but kept the matter to myself. During this time 
none of the professors of holiness said anything to me on 
the subject, but as I have since learned, were praying for 
me night and day. God only knew the severe struggles I 
had that long summer, during many hours of which I lay 
on my face, in my study, begging Jesus to cleanse my poor 
unsanctifted heart; and yet I was unwilling to make a 
public avowal of my feeling, or to ask the prayers of God's 
people for my sanctification. 

In September of that year, the Binghampton District 
Camp-meeting was held. About eighty of my charge went 
with me to the meeting. During six days of the meeting, 
the sanctification of my soul was before my mind con- 
stantly, and yet I neither urged others to seek it, nor inti- 
mated to any one my convictions and struggles on the 
subject. The result was, six days of such deep humilia- 
tion, severe distress and hard conflict, as I had never before 

A number of the members of my charge had once 
enjoyed the blessing and lost it. Some who professed to 
enjoy it were becoming silent on the subject. The Lord 
was evidently displeased with, us, and so shut us up, that 
our prayer meetings in our large tent literally ran out. 
The brethren and sisters became tried with themselves and 

REV. J. A. WOOD. _ 34.9 

each, other. Some of them were tempted to strike their 
tents and go home. 

On the last evening of the meeting, a faithful member 
of the church came to me weeping, a few minutes before 
preaching, and said, " Brother Wood, there is no use in 
trying to dodge the question. You know your duty and 
might as well commence seeking holiness first as last. If 
you will lead the way and define your position as a seeker 
of entire sanctification, you will find that many of the 
members of your charge will follow you." 

The_Lord had so humbled me, that I was willing to do 
almost anything to obtain relief. After a few moment's 
reflection, I replied : " Immediately after preaching, I will 
appoint a meeting in this tent on the subject of holiness, 
and will ask the prayers of the church for my soul." 
Glory to God ! the Rubicon was passed. In an instant I 
felt a giving Avay in my heart, so sensible and powerful, 
that it appeared rather physical than spiritual. In a 
moment after, I felt an indescribable sweetness permeating 
my entire being. It was a sweetness as real and as sensible 
to my soul as ever the sweetest honey was to my taste. I 
immediately walked up into the preacher's stand. The 
Presiding Elder requested me to exhort after his sermon. 
I replied, "I will, if the Lord will help." Just as he gave 
out his text, " Let us hear the conclusion of the whole 
matter" Eccl. xii. 13, the baptism of fire and power fell 
on me. For me to describe what I then realized, is utterly 
impossible. It was such as I need not attempt to portray 
to those who have felt it, and such as I need not attempt 
to describe to those who have never realized it. The most 
of which I was conscious, was that Jesus had me in His 
arms, and^ that the heaven of heavens was streaming 
through and through my soul, in such beams of light and 
overwhelming love and glory, as can never be uttered. 
The half can never lc told ! Glory ! Glory ! O it was a 


most memorable era in the history of my probation, a 
glorious epoch in my religious experience, Never, never, 
to be forgotten. Jesus, then and there, sweetly, completely, 
and most powerfully, sanctified my soul and "body to Him- 
self. Pie melted, cleansed, filled, my unworthy soul with 
holy, sin-consuming power. 

I had always been prejudiced against persons losing 
their strength. Consequently, as might have been expected, 
when the Holy Ghost came upon me, as I was surrounded 
by about thirty ministers, it was God's order to take 
control of both soul and body, and swallow me up in the 
great depths of Plis presence and power. 

After about three hours, I gained strength to walk to 
the tent, and Ave commenced a meeting for the promotion 
of holiness. I told the brethren and sisters my purpose 
to ask their prayers as a seeker of holiness, and that Jesus 
had forstalled my design by accepting my offering the 
moment I consented to stand up for holiness and was 
willing to do anything to obtain it. Our meeting contin- 
ued all night, and such a night I never experienced before. 
A large number of my leading members commenced 
seeking holiness ; and about every half-hour during that 
whole night, the glorious power of God came down in 
streams as sweet as heaven. At times it was unspeakable 
and almost unendurable, a iceight of glory. Never will 
those present forget that night of sanctifying and refining 

What I received at the time Jesus sanctified my soul, 
was only a drop in the bucket, compared to what it has 
since pleased Him to impart. Since that hour, the deep 
and solid communion my soul has had with God, and the 
rich, deep baptisms of love and power, have ben unspeak 
able and full of glory. 



WAS deeply impressed and clearly convinced : 
1. Of the absolute necessity of holiness of 
heart, "without which none shall see the 
Lord." 2. The certainty of the attainment of 
a higher state of religious enjoyment ; it being the " will 
of God, even my sanctification." 8. The simple manner 
of obtaining it by faith . in the blood of Jesus Christ. 
" Thou shalt call his name Jesus, because he shall save his 
people -from their sins." Without a moment's delay I 
resolved then and there, fully to trust the Lord ; unwaver- 
ing faith apprehended the efficiency of the blood of Christ 
to " cleanse from all sin." My anxious and burdened soul 
cried out with vehemence, impatient to be free, 

" Oh. kill me in this rebel sin, 
And reign in triumph o'er nay. willing- heart." 

In a moment I felt my heart melt like wax before the 
fire, and my eyes suffused in tears of joy. I then rose 
from my seat and walked" about the room, exclaiming in 
an audible voice, " I am the Lord's ! I am the Lord's ! '' 
I then .fell upon my knees, and made an offering of soul 
and body to God, in the following simple manner : " Here 
Lord, I bring to thee my poor, weakly body, and sin-pollu- 
ted soul ; take me, Jesus, just as I am." At that moment 
the Holy Ghost pressed home, with power, the following 
interrogation: "Do you give up all?" Bringing to my 
recollection a " form of surrender," mentioned in Livy, 
where Egenious had inquired, " Are you the embassadors 
sent by the people of Callatia, that yon may yield up " 
yourselves and the Callatine people ? " It was - answered 


"We are." And was again asked, "Are the Callatiue 
people in their own power ? " It was answered, " They 
are." It was further inquired. "Do you deliver up your . 
selves, the people of Callatia, your city, your fields, your 
waters, your bounds, your temples, your utensils all 
things that are yours, both divine and human, into mine 
and the people of Home's power?" They say, "We 
deliver up all." And he answered, " So I receive you." 
After repeating these words several times, I said, " Now, 
O my God, I would in like manner deliver up all, my soul 
and body ; all, all no longer mine, but thine, to all 
eternity. Wilt Thou now receive me?" The Holy 
Spirit then immediately whispered in my heart, in sweetest 
accents, " Yes, I now receive you." I instantly rose up 
from my prostrate position on the floor, and exclaimed 
with emphasis, " I am the Lord's forever ! I am the Lord's 
forever ! I am the Lord's forever ! " 

I then concluded I would go up stairs and make a 
record of this most solemn transaction between God and 
my soul, in my journal, calling to my recollection the strik- 
ing words of" the prophet, " One shall say, I am the Lord's ; 
and another shall call himself by the name of Jacob ; and 
another shall subscribe with his hand unto the Lord, and 
surname himself by the name of Israel." 

On entering my bedroom, I found that brother C. had 
retired to rest, wondering in his own mind, as he after- 
ward informed me, what should have detained me so long. 
My only reply was, that " my poor soul was inexpressibly 
happy." He then remarked, " I think, brother Gaddis, you 
had better come to bed soon, as the room is cold, and 
you will injure your health by sitting up so late, when so 
much indisposed." I then very deliberately unlocked the 
book-case, and took out my journal, determined, by the 
help of God, not to give sleep to my eyes, nor slumber to 
my eyelids till I should make the long-promised dedication 

REV. M. P. GADDIS. 353 

of myself to God, in writing. The tempter now assaulted 
me in a powerful manner, for the first time during the 
whole transaction, and suggested that I had better defer it 
till the morning, and. as I could not recollect the day of 
the month, the covenant would not he binding. I listened 
but for a moment, and then replied, " Get behind me, 
Satan, for thou art an offense unto me." Blessed be God, 
Satan was bruised under my feet, and I was left in qiiiet 
possession of the victory, so unexpectedly obtained. I 
then, with much deliberation, inquired of brother C. for 
the correct time, and after having been assured that I was 
right, I made the following record, without a single 
moment's premeditation : 

" Half-past ten o'clock on this, the evening of the fifth 
day of December, year of our Lord one thousand eight 
hundred and thirty nine I dedicate my soxil and body 
anew, a living sacrifice unto God: and reckon myself 
indeed dead to sin and alive to God, through Jesus Christ 
our Lord, from this time henceforth and forever, living or 
dying to be the Lord's. 

" My life and blood I here present, 
If for thy truth they may he spent." " Amen ! 


After the signing of this solemn covenant, I hastened 
to bed. I felt that I had accomplished at last what. I had 
so long most ardently desired. I also felt an inward satis- 
faction which I had never experienced before. I could 
not sleep. My mind was impressed in a way and manner 
unknown before. After some time had elapsed, I remarked 
to brother C. that I was dying, but that I was not 
alarmed. He then remarked, that from the moment I 
entered the room and told him I was so happy, his own 
emotions had been very peculiar. I recollect that he wept 
as he talked of the state of his feelings. For a little season 


my frail body seemed to sink, and I was as cold apparently 
as if the vital spark had fled ; but, on a sudden, the power 
of the Most High overshadowed me ; my whole frame 
shook as if I had been seized with a severe lit of the ague. 
This feeling was of but short continuance ; the Holy 
G-host resuscitated my feeble frame, and filled my soul 
unutterably full of glory and of Grod. My physical powers 
were strengthened in a most wonderful manner, and I 
snouted aloud for joy upon my bed. For a short time I 
was perfectly overwhelmed Avith a sense of the power and 
majesty of Jehovah. At times it seemed to me as if the 
frail casket would break, and my disinthralled spirit 

" Return on swiftest wing," 

to mingle with the "blood-washed," before the throne. I 
cried out in the fullness of my soul, " O, yes, it is done ! I 
am my Lord's and he is mine for ever, for ever, for ever- 
more ! Brother C. the ' record ' is at last made the great 
transaction is finished I am now the Lord's, and he is 
mine ! Blessed be the name of the Lord from this time 
henceforth and for ever. Amen and amen.'' I then 
thought of a dream which the Rev. Bishop Hamline 
had concerning me, a few nights previous, that seemed to 
have made a deep impression on his own heart. He 
stated that in his dream " he saw me die suddenly while 
standing in the altar at ''Wesley Chapel." Referring to his 
dream in my ecstacy, I exclaimed, " O yes, brother H., I 
am indeed dying yea, I am now dead but I am dying 
unto sin. Glory, hallelujah! Amen. I now reckon my- 
self dead unto sin, but alive unto God. The dead praise 
Him not, but the living shall praise Him as I do this day, 

' I'll praise my Maker while I've breath, 
And when my voice is loss in death, 
Praise shall my nobler powers employ, 
In that eternal world of joy.' " 



Y mind had been in a condition of bewilderment. 
Like a vessel in a fog, I could not ascertain my 
position, or satisfy myself that my course was 
either right or safe. I felt that I was not 
living that life of faith and obedience which the scriptures 
clearly require. 

But how to reach that elevated position of divinely 
wrought holiness, I knew not. That I was not right was 
as clear as a sunbeam, but how to get so, I knew not. I 
read everything that came to hand on the subject, and 
Corresponded with several individuals whom I supposed 
capable of assisting me, but all apparently to little purpose. 
Not that all of this was really labor lost, but it seemed at 
the time that I was gaining nothing. , 

I was ignorant, and the Lord was leading me in a way 
I knew not. But I was in the hands of a kind and skillful 
Physician, who gave His remedies adapted to my wants 
rather than my tastes. I now see that what the Lord does 
to save us from sin, is just the thing calculated to effect, 
the object aimed at. He did not leave me to my own way ; 
neither did Pie trust me with my own management. He 
undertook for me, and the way I have been led has proved 
itself to le right. 

But I must now tell where I am, and what has been 
done for me. And here E must proceed cautiously : we 
have doubtless a right to tell all that the Lord really does 


in us and for us. In the first place, I will say, that I can 
now understand fully the idea of having a BIBLE EXPERI- 
ENCE. The Lord has taught me hy the WORD. This is a 
new field for me, but the most glorious of any experience 
I ever had. When T first read the views of the author of 
''Faith and its Effects," I did not see the power of the 
thing. But the Lord took that very course with me, and 
I was amazed at the result ! 

It does seem, to me now that I obtain a clearer knowl- 
edge of more Scripture in one day than during a month 
formerly. And then what conviction of the TRUTH! I 
cannot describe it; but those who have expeiienced it 
alone can know. The prophet says, "All thy children 
shall be taught of God, and great shall be the peace of thy 

And now how inestimably precious is the Bible ! Let 
him that hath a dream tell it, but I prefer this method of 
instruction. The "Word of God is my meditation day and 
night. I can lean on nothing else with confidence now. 
Plow full of meaning is every passage of Holy "Writ. It 
meets my every want, answers all my difficulties, solves all 
my perplexities! I do indeed find it "profitable for 
doctrine, reproof, correction and instruction in righteous- 
ness," so that I am thereby thoroughly furnished for every 
good work. If I ask the Lord for instruction on any 
point, I am sure to get my answer by reference to the 
Word, and that in most instances before I rise from prayer. 
I do not wonder that the natural man understandeth not 
the things of the Spirit, for they are spiritually discerned. 
My heart says, "Praise the Lord!" and those who read 
these lines will say-so too. 

Another experience I will mention called the "REST OF 
FAITH." The term expresses the idea as I now apprehend 
it. My experience verifies the scripture declaration : "We 
who believe, DO enter into rest." This rest is truly ceasing 


from our own work. For it is God that worketh in us 
both to will and to do of His good pleasure. My labors, 
and toils, and struggles are over, and my soul rests in God. 
I am given up into His hands as His instrument to be 
used by Him for the accomplishment of His purposes. I 
am no longer my own, but His by purchase, and to be 
used wholly in His service. 

As to the extent of holiness, I see no end. It is just 
as illimitable as the source from whence it proceeds. The 
term, when used as expressive of a state in^p which mor- 
tals, through the blood of the everlasting covenant may 
enter, implies a life hidden in God. Without Christ we 
can do nothing. Through Christ, who strengtheneth us, 
we can do anything that He would have us do. 

When John was asked who he was, he replied, " I am 
a VOICE." God was using him to point out a Saviour. 
This is my Avill, to be a VOICE, and have the Spirit of the 
living God furnish the matter and manner. What an idea 
does the Scripture present in the declaration, " Ye are the 
temple of the Holy Ghost ! " "I will dwell in them and 
walk in them." And are we indeed thus called to be the 
representatives of God on earth. ! Has the great God no 
better way of manifesting Himself than to take our bodies 
and act out Himself in us ? Surely professed Christians 
do not realize the fact. I do not wonder that the Holy 
Spirit leaves so many, for they do no honor to the Being 
they represent. Most surely Christians are called to 
exhibit before the world an indwelling God, for the Triune 
Deity takes up His abode with the disciple who loves Him 
and keeps His ivdrds. 

My all-absorbing desire is to be literally lost in God. 
To have no wish or aim apart from the will of God. To 
keep ALL, body, soul, and spirit, at the service of God. 



an inextinguishable desire to communicato 
a knowledge of the unspeakable blessing which 
I have received. In 1846 I read " The Way 
of Holiness." It was the first book, aside from 
the Bible, that gave me tangible views of the great doc- 
trine of entire sanctification. In this I saw the blessing 
standing out before me in a substantial, practical form. I 
commenced seeking it in earnest, and I now see was on 
the eve of embracing it, but my faith staggered, and the 
precious gift seemed to take a position at a distance from 
me. Still my determination was to direct my desires and 
efforts toward it long as life endured, spurred on by the 
fear that should I fail to attain it, my soul would be lost. 

Still I failed in bringing it to the point that I would 
sell all for this pearl of great price, and while lingering 
thus from month to month, I was often the object of pain- 
ful doubts as to whether I was really justified before God. 
It is true 1 preached the doctrine with all the power I had, 
my arguments and appeals on the subject all the time lash- 
ing me with terrible effect. 

In this state of things, a ministerial friend sent me by 
mail, " Faith and its Effects." This, by the blessing of 
God, was made my Joshua to guide and urge me into the 
promised land of perfect love. I commenced reading the 
book one evening, and resumed it again the next evening, 


with no settled plan of seeking the blessing which the hook 
described. I read to the sixteenth section, when I became 
alarmed in view of the danger and awful consequences- of 
delay. Immediately I kneeled down with a fixed purpose 
to make an effort, and extend it as far as my ability should 
reach. That moment I could say. 

" Already springing hope I feel, 
God will destroy the powers of hell." 

I commenced making an entire conseciation. The first 
object that presented itself was the best beloved of my 
heart. After an earnest effort- 1 succeeded in getting her 
on the altar. Next came my library, which had often 
been a snare to me. This, also, was given up. Other 
objects were then presented, all of which were laid upon 
the altar, till, at last, came my own will. 

Then passed before me various circumstances where I 
had resisted the will of God, for the gratification of my 
own will. Among other things, through almost my whole 
Christian course, 1 had indulged a shrinking from continu- 
ing long in prayer, as my Saviour did, when He spent the 
whole night in prayer for me and a lost world. But I now 
consciously gave up my will on this and every point without 

The Holy Spirit then impressed upon my mind the vast 
importance and duty of believing the offering thus given to 
God through Christ, accepted and sanctified. Glory be to 
G>d !- grace was given, and the great bar was past ! Next 
the Holy Spirit brought before me the duty of believing 
that God would keep by His power that which I had now 
committed Him, on condition that I would continue, by 
faith, to keep the offering in His bands. 

The exercise of this glorious faith through the stupen- 
dous mercy of God became a conscious reality. The solemn 
engagement was then made and ratified between God and 


my soul, that His Spirit would lead me, and that I, assisted 
by Plis grace, should follow on, till time with me should 
be no more. And now I am kept by the power of God 
through faith unto salvation. " Satan cometh, and hath 
nothing in me." Still he is permitted to tempt, but not over- 
come. I had a terrible struggle with the adversary 
recently. I had been praying for a greater fullness and 
clearer light. I commenced my evening devotions at a 
very early hour. The unutterable breathings of my soul 
were for light ! light ! the words of my Saviour meanwhile 
sounding in my ear, " If ye abide in me, and my words 
abide in you, ye shall ask what ye will, and it shall be done 
unto you." 

The tempter not questioning my sanctification, sug 
gested that my request was within the limits of the prom- 
ises, and that if I did not realize what I was praying for 
my sanctification would die out. I was greatly distressed 
at the thought. An agony ensued, calling into requisition 
eveiy power of mind, soul, and body. The roaring of the 
fiend during this conflict was at its height when these 
words came as from more than angel lips, " Blessed is the 
man that endureth temptation, for when he is tried, he shall 
receive the crown of life, which the Lord hath promised to 
them that love Him." In a moment the battle was turned 
to the gate, and the enemy left me in the calm confidence 
of triumphant, unshaken faith. Though the descriptions 
that some have given of this precious state of holiness 
h glowing, yet I can truly say the half has not been told 

And sliall I slight my Father's love, 

Or basely fear His gifts to own ? 
Unmindful of His favors prove? 

Shall I, the halloiv'd cross to shun. 
Refuse His righteousness to impart, 
By hiding it within my heart ? 



HAT did I need ? Not the witness of my per- 
sonal acceptance; that I had gained before, 
and had never fully lost, though I had held it 
with tremulous, loosening grasp, as a mariner 
overboard in the ice-waves of the pole, clings to a floating 
berg. I wanted the proof of my call to the ministry ; that 
only could fix me. I had been taught that reason. Provi- 
dence, and such outward signs, enough proved a man's 
call; and that anything inward was vanity, yea, fanaticism. 
But now I said : " Lord, if there truly "be such a thing as 
an inward call, a clear, positive witness of my fitness for 
the ministry, and Thy purpose for me in it, give it to me ; 
for without such assurance I shall never abide." 

Two weeks of prayer brought it. O ! ifc came, blessed 
be God, cl&ir, strong, full, unmistakable. The Spirit wit- 
nessed thus : " Yes, you were born for this, created, fore- 
ordained for it, and in this work you are henceforth to live 
and die ; so that no authorship, professorship, or teacher- 
ship, nothing whatever, shall allure." "Ah, then," I 
said, " I shall stand now sure, firm, fixed, never wavering. 
The problem is solved, doubt is all gone, and my work is 

How the future's path then glowed ! How life then 
charmed ! How toil became pastime ! Two years have 
passed since then, and daily, hourly, even amid trials, 
hatreds, curses, and afflictions, this pillar of fire by night 
goes before me, brightening at each step. But this was 
only the opening eyelid of the morn. Full-orbed glory 


was y&i to come. One ray "but wakened the breath for 
more and many. Christ, too much to me as to others, had 
been one far off, over the sea, a proprietor or principal 'for 
whom I was- steward and agent, and to whom I sent back 
my account, imperfect indeed, "but true ; for which I 
received the recompensing commission. That was not suf- 
ficient. Ah ! I wanted Him to come to me, or myself to 
go to Him, and be united in a life-partnership, in an eter- 
nal fellowship. All through the winter's remnant and the 
summer's fullness, the prayer for this divine realization 
was offered. One more specialty was added to it, and 
sought amid other things. I had bid souls to God because 
He was great and worthy ; because . His service was their 
duty and mine ; because, if it was not given, they and I 
should be lost. If loss came, then it was just and right. 
But oh, there was not in my soul tender compassion, 
ardent, burning love for the poor, sulking sinner. I 
wanted this, for it was needed. So my prayer was: 
" Lord, give me an unction for souls, the baptism of the 
Holy Ghost, that I may compassionate the lost and win 
them to Christ." 

Alas ! it seemed as if these two prayers, daily, hourly 
going up to God in clouds of importunity, would never be 
answered. But the delay was only to accumulate the 
blessing. One day, in the first autumn month, the Metho- 
dist brother having charge here, came to me. He told 
how that at camp-meeting, just closed, God was present ; 
how that the Spirit had come with his brethren as with a 
cloud into the sanctuary ; how that his faith foresaw, nay, 
that present sight even declared a great work of God. He 
told me that if I and my people wished to he blessed, " it 
would be well to follow where God led, dropping all dis- 
tinctions, and working together in Christian fellowship." 
I listened doubtfully, shrugged my shoulders and shut up 
my heart. Candidly I told him that T did not like his 

EEV. G. H. A. BVLKLEY. 363 

sect, its shouts and groans, its methods and teachings; and 
that neither I nor my people could labor well with him and 
his. Like Abraham, but without the old saint's largeness 
of heart, I bid him, like Lot, go his way and I would go 
mine. This was not like Christ ; but, as Paul did, I sinned 
ignorantly in unbelief, and God had mercy on me. 

My brother begged me to come and see. I. went. I 
saw young men, but a little while ago thoughtless and 
hardened, now bowing there at God's feet, and -1 said, 
" This is a divine work ; only the Spirit could thus hum- 
ble." So at once I laid all my bigotry, my prejudices, my 
conventionalisms, and my sectarianism, in one black bun- 
dle at Christ's feet, and pledged myself to my brother in 
my Master's name, to help him as the Lord should will. 
My own people were not alive. Alas ! they did not at first 
hear my own or their Master's voice ; and I went on aloce 
and unapproved. Sabbath night came, when my Methodist 
brother asked me to preach for him. I consented, there 
not being service with us. God gave me the right text : 
"Rejoice, O young man, etc." While I spoke, the veil was 
lifted, time fled away, and eternity with its judgment 
appeared. Oh God ! I saw poor souls, precious beyond 
myriads of worlds, sweeping up thither without hope. My 
heart broke, it melted, it ran, so much did the power of 
truth and love flow together within, that I was like an 
over-freighted bark, nigh to sinking. Therefore, I cried 
out for God to stay His hand, for it seemed more than I 
.could bear and live. It was stayed, but to my grief ; for, 
though that night many souls were pricked and wounded, 
and though I went home peaceful at first, the light within 
was veiled, the chains around were renewed. 

The evening before Sabbath came. Meantime I had 
peace again. Then we met, disciples, young and old, to 
tell of Jesus' love. It was a pleasant, cheerful meeting ; 
no excitement whatever there, but a sweet, pervading 


breath of joy. At its close, souls were called to the altar. 
Then a neighboring Congregational brother spoke, telling 
of his own experience. His word was powerful. As he 
exhorted, I stood beside the pastor, and my eye ranged 
over the souls yet unborn, many of whom I had warned, 
and prayed over in love. These, and others of my own 
flock, dead in sin, came to my thought. Alas ! how dread- 
fully gleamed their guilt, how luridly flashed their sins 
on my soul. The terror of their doom in unbelief black- 
ened on my view. What if they should be lost ! What a 
death must be theirs forever ! At that moment a strange 
sensation filled me. My heart began, as it were, to col- 
lapse, and shrivel far within, like a parchment-roll in the 
flame. What spiritual agony was that ! I turned to the 
pastor and said, "My brother, I am dying." "You are 
not sick or faint 1 ? " he asked. "Oh no," I answered ; "my 
soul is sorrowful, even unto death ; I shall fall." " No 
matter," lie repHed ; "let go of yourself." I fell ; instantly 
his arms embraced me. 

Then it seemed (I say it seemed, not because it was not 
reality, for it WAS, deep and intense ; but because figures 
only, and those but faint, can express what imagination 
did not do,) it seemed as if a heart ten thousand times 
greater than my own, was projected into it, till it filled, 
swelled, and burst. Then came arms, as if Infinite and 
Omnipotent, passing up through my soul, and reaching 
towards those and other souls, with wide sweep gathering 
them up and bringing them into me, to press them through 
my soul, till, like a travailing woman, I writhed and 
groaned and cried. Then a deep, majestic current came 
sweeping on, and surging me high up over the eternal 
shores, where the Judgment throne was fixed. And then 
rose the Sinai of eternity, where blackness and darkness 
rolled in massive clouds, frighting the soul of sin. There 
Holiness, Justice, and Truth reigned over the guilty. 

REV. O. H. A. BULKLET. 365 

"Before Jehovah's awful throne," souls swept, receiving 
their doom. My soul was tortured with grief for them, 
as through that gloom a voice of divine wrath spoke in 
spiritual tones, " Tell them, tell those unbelieving souls 
that here, if they come in sin, I will say to them, ' Because 
I called and ye refused, I stretched out my hand, and ye 
regarded not,' therefore your fear and desolation shall come. 
as a whirlwind." I told them so. Some believed, some 
feared, while others mocked. 

All this time personal consciousness of place and cir- 
cumstances remained. Neither air nor. water I wanted ; 
for I Avas not faint, nor sick in body, only in soul. At 
last the calm came, when prayer began. Then faith lived; 
then peace flowed. Souls, yet unborn, in fact, were seen 
passing through birth. Troubles, fears, anxieties, doubts, 
cares, were all sunk in an ocean of love, and I was borne 
along in an ark of faith on the upper wave. They lifted 
me up, for I was weak of frame, though strong of soul. I 
spoke to them of unbelief; of the sin against the Holy 
Ghost, which I then saw ; of the judgment to come ; of 
the celestial home ; of the eternal hell. Ah, it was the 
place of God's presence there, the ante-chamber of the 
great future. Souls trembled and wondered. They took 
me home, a wonder to many, not less a wonder to myself. 
It was all a new and strange thing to me, for I had never 
seen an instance of the so-called "power," which this was, 
although I had never doubted its reality. After sweet and 
tender prayer, I laid down to rest. Almost instantly, like 
a tired babe embraced in love, I dropped into a slumber, 
such as never before since childhood I have ever known 
for its sweetness and fullness. Long before dawn it ceased. 
"Waking as by a touch, the Divine Spirit communed with 
my soul ; bade me in clear, unmistakable language, what 
to do. 

Among many things that Sabbath night, I was to 


preach, at God's bidding, on the words, "Greater love 
hath no man than this : that a man lay down his life for 
his friends." It must be in the church where I had been 
the evening previous. Though I had not been invited, my 
brother on being told of it, recognized the divine direction. 
God promised to slioAv me Christ's love as I had never 
before known it. That morning, on rising, strength came 
into my frame. Oh, how like a giant's members mine 
seemed. It was Elijah's power, or rather, like it. Never 
before had I felt so strong in body", never, likewise, so 
clear in mind, so bold of soul. Thus did I go to the sanc- 
tuary. My text was this : " There shall be weeping and 
gnashing of teetli when ye shall see Abraham and Isaac 
and Jacob, and all the prophets in the kingdom of God, 
and you yourselves thrust out." God aided me in speech. 
Pie seemed to give me the spirit of one of the old prophets. 
I cried aloud and spared not, telling my people of their 
sins, seeing them at the judgmennt seat, arid alarmed in 
soul at their danger. Night came, and with it a crowd to 
the church, where I had engaged to preach. Not to hear 
my poor speech, but drawn thither by the Unseen. I told 
them of Christ's love ; for it came to me then as a present 
reality, an intense conception, almost like a pictured vision. 
All, such love, so marvelous, so infinite ! But, alas ! the 
guilt so terrible of its rejection, the baseness so damning 
of its despisal ! This made that love a terror to the soul 
of sin. Yes, this was the new light in which God showed 
to me Christ's love. It did not melt, but smote ; it did not 
comfort, but condemn. Nevertheless, it saved. 

Now, then, came the power of the tempter. Next 
day, complaints, censures, revilings, sunk like spears and 
arrows into the already wounded heart. They called the 
preacher wild and fanatical. Only a few spoke words of 
kindness. One chiefly, and most tenderly of all, was the 
brother who stood to receive the smitten. I said to him in 

REV. C. H. A. BULKLEY. 367 

anguish, " My brother, they pierce, they crucify me, even 
my own people." " No matter," he replied ; " so it was 
with the Lord." At my request, we went into his empty 
church, and sat down in the .pulpit. We agreed to a 
mutual consecration, and tqgether knelt in prayer. At the 
very outset God took my soul into His hands, and bore 
me tip to the presence of ineffable glory. Through this, 
the Spirit of His Son, with a clearness and definiteness of 
tone that spake with, power, in my heart and through my 
lips, asked me for each and everyone of my life's cherished 
treasures. I plead with God. I reasoned with Him at 
every step, to let me keep but one gift. No : all or none ! 
I yielded all, and He took all. .Oh, in that hour I felt like 
an outcast seaman, left on a desert island in mid-ocean. 
Inwardly I suffered the loss of all things more keenly than 
if outwardly they had been in reality taken away ; for then 
I had still retained the affection and anticipation of them. 
But now all ties of life seemed broken, all interests of 
time lost, all joys of earth quenched. In that hour I saw 
before me in the world only tribulations, sneers, censures, 
oppositions ; but in Christ, I beheld inwardly, truth, love, 
and divine glory as mine. That was the " sealing of the 
Spirit." Under that process, a fiery ordeal indeed, I cried 
like a babe torn from its mother's heart. All hope?, all 
ambitions, all interests, all affections, every thing of life, 
then stripped off ; passed ' completely into God's hands. 
'That was the "inward crucifixion," "the circumcision of 
the heart," The will of self fell into the will of God, 
as a rain-drop or snow-flake falls into the sea, and becomes 
a part of its current. Thus began the union of the human 
soul with the divine nature. "What were the results of all 
this? Let others speak of those external to myself. 
Nothing do I see to glory in or commend. Only of that 
which is within can I tell, and that imperfectly. At first 
I felt as if a besieged city, overcome and prostrate, lay in 


my life, amid ruins ; as if a dissected frame were mine, 
yet intensely alive and sensitive to every touch of evil, 
every word of error. One tiling was still needed after 
that burning, the annointing of love, the oil of God, to 
soothe the seared humanity. Physically, the extremities 
of my frame were still endued with what seemed super- 
human strength, yet at the centre, in the heart's place, all 
was vacancy and weakness, as if a sword had there divi- 
ded me in twain. Intellectually, thought was quick and 
intensified, conceptions of truth were clear and strong, 
speech was fuller and truer; only the old habitudes of 
mind hampered the utterance. The former poetic and 
ornate sentences, which gave pleasure to the earthly taste, 
with just enough truth in them to save from damnation, 
were gone to ashes, burned up as hay, wood, and stubble. 
In their place, plain, speech, simple thought, yea, even 
sometimes common-place expression entered, displeasing to 
minds who think that popularity and success with minis- 
ters depend tipon beauty and not upon truth. Preaching 
became and now is attractive, glorious. The Sabbaths 
come not often and nigh enough. Study and prayer, and 
converse on religious themes, are an intense delight, 
unceasingly. The interests of earth excite but little; it 
is child's play to talk of or attend to them. Time is a 
shortened duration, in which all the energies must be 
enlisted to the utmost. Oh, it is a glory thus to live ! I 
never knew before what that term "glory" meant. It 
has been like the flashings of a rocket-wheel, expiring in 
the moment that it shines. Now it is the pathway of suns, 
the sweep of comets through my soul's firmament. Night 
and day God realizes himself to my soul. Spiritually, this 
life is indeed beyond description; truly, its peace passes 
understanding ; its joy is unspeakable. 


These works have been translated into different languages, and 

scattered broadcast among all Evangelical CJiristians 

in Europe and America. The publisher of the 

English Edition, under (lie caption, 

Mrs, Palmer's Books make Working Christians, 


The chief characteristics of Mrs. Palmer's productions may be brieflysummed 
up thus : I. A lofty and pure Ideal of Christianity and the Christian life. II. She is 
deeply in earnest to exemplify this ideal; not by fitful endeavors, -but by a steady and 
persistent strife. In her there is no tinge of quietism. III. Her writings are we! 
adapted to set everybody in motion with whom they come in contact. We know 
of no human book that will so stir a person's soul to its lowest depths as her 
They exhibit a rare insight into the Scriptures, a clear view of thrt temptations of 
the enemy, and the method provided for our escap"e ; while, at the same time, they 
open up so clearly the great doctrine of holiness, that no one in earnest to find it need 
stumble. V. As a crowning excellence, they, indicate a present salvation. Many 
have a way of talking and writing about religion very convincing indeed ; but then 
the hearer or reader, after swallowing the nostrum, falls asleep, without thinking, 
or perhaps making any effort for the next twenty years. Not so with our author ; 
every line is an exhortation to present duty. 

Way of Holiness, with Notes lay the Way: 

Being the result of a determination to he a Bible Christian. 

We recommend it as one of the best books that can be put in the hands of 
inquirers after full salvation in Christ. It bears the stamp of no one particular sect, 
but teaches the way of holiness in truth and love. Evangelist. 

Pure in sentiment, correct in theology, and beautiful in composition. Of all 
that has been written on the precious theme of entire sanctification, it is douitful 
whether anything is better calculated to rouse pious desire, and guide the soul in 
its seeking Ladies' Repository. 

Contains a remarkably clear exposition of the Doctrine of Entire Sanctification, 
and the scriptural way of attaining to the experience of this inestimable blessing. 
Wesleyan Methodist Magazine, England. 

It is a book rich in experience, and breathing a spirit full of humility and 
love. Primitive Methodist Magazine, England. 

One of the best books of its class which has been issued from the press- in a 
long time. If such books were more in vogue, more holiness would be exemplified 
by professed Christians. Wesley an Association Magazine, England. 




Economy of Salvation, its Doctrines and Duties, 

12tli American Edition. Price $1.50. 

It is gotten up in the neatest style of the art, and is ornamented with a likeness 
of the author, beautifully executed on steel. In an admirable degree, it contains 
the exciting interest of narrative with the profit of didactic reading. The articles 
are generally short, and furnish the richest variety, and all are prevaded by thu 
heavenly unctuous spirit which characterizes the author. There are one hundred 
and seventy-three topics discussed, illustrated, many of them, by the most thrilling 
incidents. The work is general in its character, and treats of religious doctrines and 
duties in their various phases. It is eminently practical as well as experimental. 
Northern Christian Advocate. 

Many of the " illustrations " are beautifully simple, and told in a winning straw 
of touching eloquence. The %ook cannot fail to" do good, for the blessing of the 
Almighty is with it. National Magaxine. 




Addressed to Ministers and People of all Christian communities. 
Price $1.50 

This very timely and interesting work has already passed through several 
editions ; and, like all the preceding works, has been re-published in Europe. Of 
the numerous flattering notices of the press, the space allowed us will leave room 
but for a few. " The idea of the work is a grand one. It is the part woman is to take 
in the salvation of the world ; how far she may legitimately exercise her gifts in the 
church, and to what extent she may be a witness for Jesus. The author of this work 
has already contributed more than any other woman in America to vitalize, instruct, 
encourage, and improve the Christian church All Christian ministers and the 
laity will be sensibly invigorated by reading it." New Tork Christian Advocate. 

What part has woman in the great work of human redemption ? How far is 
she to use her gift in the church of God? How far is it her right to prophesy? 
How far may she receive the tongue of fire, and use it for the salvation of the 
world ? These questions are answered in this volume clearly, fully, scripturally and 
practically. New Tork Commercial Advertiser. 

Mrs. Palmer has, during the last twenty years, sent forth a number of publica- 
tions on the highest possible themes, and taken the highest ground of Christian 
experience. Their broadest diffusion, in Europe and America, attests their power. 
The prese'nt volume has a title which enigmatically indicates the object of the work. 
Its purpose is to spread before our churches, of all denominations, the arguments in 
behalf of the exercise of female gifts, in the direct promotion of the gospel. She 
claims no unfeminine woman's rights. Methodist Quarterly Review. 




It treats of every stage of religious experience and practice, from the dawn of 
conviction for sin to the stage of hallowed intimacy with God, enjoyed by the 
mature veteran believer. The 'reader will find here the best thoughts, on a thou- 
sand points of Christian truth, of a mind highly endowed by nature, constantly 
impelled by a consuming zeal for the salvation of souls, and enlightened and guided 
by long-continued habits of communion with God and His WORD. Enlivened and 
illustrated by intermixture of fact and incident. North. Chris. Adiio. 

The simplicity of faith, and manne' of its exercise, are so logically presented as 
to be unmistakable to the least discerning mind. ZiorHs Herald. 

The author shows clearly that it is the will of God that believers should be 
wholly sanctified. In doing this, she exposes and corrects the errors into, which 
some have fallen, points out the good old way of attaining this state of grace, and 
supports all she advances by direct and incidental appeals to the WORD OF GOD. 
Neiu York Christian Advocate. 

This work is rich in all the best experiences of the Christian life. If the 
rationale of faith is still to seek, its reality and power are put beyond all doubt ot 
controversy, and the believer stands immeasurably in advance of the philosopher. 
London Quarterly, England. 


25th Edition. Price 40 cts. 

A charming present for the holidays. This is a new edition, improved and 
enlarged ; but it has no new doctrines to teach. A mere announcement of the work 
will be sufficient to lead many to supply themselves with it. West. Chris. Advo. 

Well worthy a place in the Christian library, or as a travelling pocket com- 
panion. Christian Repository. ^ 

If public demand and extensive circulation are an evidence of value, much 
sterling value must be accorded to the book. Christian Advocate. 

The amiable authoress is already known to the religious public of this country 
by several eminently pious and useful productions ; and this work is equal in merit 
to the rest of her valuable writings. We could wish these works a very extensive 
circulation. Methodist Magaxine, England. 

So widely is the beloved author known, tha: any words of explanation or 
recommendation would be superfluous. Ladle? Repository. 

In this volume the nature of Holiness is set forth, the way of entering into the 
enjoyment of it -plainly pointed out, and the advantages to ourselves and others 
described. Weekly Message. 



Comprising the travels, incidents, and evangelistic labors of Dr. and 
Mrs. Palmer, in England,, Ireland, Scotland and Wales. The nth 
Thousand is now before the public. It contains a fine Steel Engra- 
ving of Dr. and Mrs. Palmer, executed for this work. 1 vol. 12mo, 
700 pages. Handsomely bound, bevelled boards, red edges. S3. 00. 

" It is a narrative of singular interest, arising frequently into the sublime and 
thrilling. The work cannot fail to be a help to those seeking to make the utmost 
consecration of themselves to God. Fittsturg Christian Aduncate. 

" It is certainly a most wonderful book. . '. . We are mistaken if it does 
not become a universal favorite with the reading public. If ministers would read 
it, they would-soon find such an amount of incident as they never saw before, in the 
same number of pages." Zion"s Herald. 

" The facts recorded in this volume are really marvelous. ... It was worth 
a lifetime to achieve such results for the Master. We recommend the book as a 
record of one of the most wonderful works of God in human history. Sunday School 

"We have read this work with deepest interest. It is but subordinately a 
record of travels and of incidents connected therewith, sach as would have engaged 
the attention of ordinary tourists. . . . Such a record is scarcely to be found." 
JHwih-Western Christian Advocate. 

" Scrupulously exact in us descriptions of the scenery of the lands visited, of 
interesting incident's and ancient remains, &c. ; narrating them in an animated, 
graphic style. The great and special interest of the work is the manifestation of the 
Spirit of God in convincing and converting the soul. Considered in this light, the 
book stands almost alone." Ladies' Repository. 



Price, 55 cts. 

The subject of this narrative was emphatically a daughter of affliction. Born 
in affluent circumstances, she was in a very singular manner made acquainted with 
experimental religion at an early age ; and the pictures that follow of her trials, 
relapses, her rebellions, her recoveries, her usefulness, her faith, her piety, through 
scenes of affliction, bereavement, hardships, and privation, make up one of the most 
singular and interesting books of personal experience we have ever read. Local 
Preacher's Magaxine, England. 

Mrs. Palmer's former works have gained for het a high reputation, and very 
deservedly too. The present volume will do good by bringing more fully to light 
the virtues of one who would otherwise have remained comparatively unknown. It 
is a pleasing record of unostentatious usefulness. This work has been re-published 
in England, and passed through several editions. Northern Chrittian Advocate. 







PIECE I.D. #: 





I.D. # 



UCL 397-74 

6 529 289 



-- - ' 

2- 10158 


tfTryfPifiZk' _ r -S.. -YV , ' ' ** 

Jfe-aAv JpTi, ;, .&-,->-' v 

"m ?^K^ ;H- "- ^ ,r^r-> J < - *- 

^|j5K-jp? f iA& ""^W~ ->_ ^ ^- y*-v* 
^^fgpH^* : ^iA* -/--- * / |