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Full text of "The Life Of Charles Stewart Parnell Vol - I"

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JEi. 33]                    ILLNESS OF BUTT                           179
had difficulty in breathing, nearly as great as I used to have at Buxton on the night I came over with you. It has continued more or less ever since. My journey to the sitting-room here—you know the length—has been a series of relays and pantings, and all this is accompanied by vagueness in my trains of thought. Now surely, my dear friend, it is useless to say that this is of no consequence. Is it not better to accept the truth that' it is the knell of the curfew telling us the hour is come when the fire must be put out and the light quenched? If not, is it not at least something that requires more care than you or I or Butcher have given it? In other respects I am improving. You will see in this letter that my hand is steadier, but does not this give to these symptoms a worse character ? I have observed latterly that in writing I very frequently omit a word, far oftener the syllables or letters of a word. When half-aii-hour in bed last night I had lost all recollection of where I was, or how I came to be where I was. I had great difficulty in settling to myself whether the change from Irish to English time made my watch fast or slow. Is it not through the want of blood to feed the action of the brain, or is it only congestion of the ganglionic nerves ? Do not laugh at this, tell me honestly, and as a true, because a candid, friend what you think. I will, go to Quain to-morrow, but I fear this is of no use. I have taken a strange notion in my head. I would like to consult a perfect stranger who does not know me, and see what he would say. If I were to carry out this perverse notion, who would be the best man to select ? Can I depend on you to tell me the truth? I will write to you to-morrow what Quain says. I am afraid I must stay here until the Education Bill passes. If I
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