T
E R B -5 A_
THE '" ' "" '
E X C'L A M A T I O N S
OF THE
SOUL TO GO D[:
O R T H E
MEDITATIONS
O F
C <6 TSi <! > SI
o
AFTER COMMUNION.
NEWLY TRANSLATED.
Together with an
INTRODUCTORY DEDICATION
T o A
REVEREND PRIORESS.
BY r H E
Fellow of the Society of Antiquaries.
LONDON;
Printed by J P. COGHLAN, No. 37. Duke-Sire?;-,
Grofvenor-Square ; and Sold by Meilrs.
Pater-Noftcr Row. M,DCC,A-C.
TO THE REVEREND MOTHER
MARY AUGUSTINA MORE,
PRIORESS
OF THE
ENGLISH CANONESSES of the ORDER
of St. AUGUSTINE at BRUGES,
MADAM,
" * HE Meditations of St. Ttrefa
" after Communion" fays the pious
and learned Alban Butler, " are full
" of affe&ive fentiments of humi-
" lity, fear, love and other virtues.
" Many finners, by reading thefe
' Meditations, have been converted
to God, and embraced a courfe
a " of
c of perfect virtue." Saints Lives,
-vol. x. p. 376. Nov. Ed. It was this
teflimony of the above mentioned
venerable Author, once the Director
of your pious Community, that firft
turned my attention to the prefent
little treatife. In taking it in hand
I was prepared to meet with thoi ;
tender fentiments of devotion . v .^nd
thofe pure maxims of heavenly doc-
trine, which the Church afcribes to
our Saint in the prayer appointed
for her feftival ; to my furprize
however, on perufing it, I difcove-
red that pathetic drain of eloquence,
and that quicknefs and fublimity of
imagination, which are to be found
in few devotional treatifes : In Chort*
I was convinced it deferved to be
generally known, and that it was
not more calculated to gratify the
devotion
devotion
votion of the Pious, than to pro-
duce the effect afcribed to it above,
by your late refpe&ed friend, the
converfion of finners.
Unfortunately however, this work
has hitherto, in our tongue, exifted
only in the cold and obfolete lan-
guage of Woodhead's literal tran-
flation; and owing to fome accident,
probably to fewer copies of it being
taken off, the fecond Volume of his
works of St. Tcrefa, which contains
the prefent treatife, is extremely
fearce. Thefe confiderations have
induced me to undertake the pre-
fent work ; in which, fatisfying my-
felf with preferving the fenfe of the
original, I have taken that liberty
with the idiom which feemed ne-
ceflary to point out the connexion
of the Saint's arguments and ideas,
a 2 and
( iv )
and to render the work intelligible
and pleafing to an Englifh reader:
a mode of tranflation, which, where
controverfy is out of the queftion,
appears to me the only one that does
juftice, at the fame time, to the Au-
thor and the Reader. With this
idea of tranflating, it will not be
expe&ed I mould have thought my-
felf under an abfolute neceffity of
working from the original language ;
it feemed fufficient to afcertain the
meaning of the Saint, by verfions of
approved judgment and fidelity.
I therefore confulted and compared
together .thofe of the celebrated
D'Andilly, the careful F. Cyprian,
and our own venerable Woodhead ;
and finding them almoft always a-
greeing in their fenfe of the Au-
thor, however much they differ in
their
their ftyle of writing, I was perfua-
ded I had every thing that was ne-
ceffary for my prefent purpofe, and
faw the inutility of procuring this
tranflation to be compared with the
original Spanifh, by perfons well
flailed in that language, as I had at
firft defigned. The beft tranflation
of a devotional treatife in our lan-
guage (a treatife itfelf that is not to
be equalled in its kind) The Suffer-
ings of Jefus, was not made from
the original Portuguefe, but from
the French verfion of F. Alleaume.
So much for the prefent tranfla-
tion : As to the reafons which have
induced me, Madam, to put it un-
der your patronage, they are fuch
as, I am fenfible, I mud not men-
tion to you, but, at the fame time,
they are fuch as I need not mention
to
( vi )
to a-ny one elfe, who has the happi-
nefs of being acquainted with you.
Thus much however you will allow
me to fay, that, in an age which
feems to threaten a fecond grand
defection from the Church, under
the delufive idea of reforming er-
rors and abufes, a work of the old
ftamp, like this, calculated to op-
pofe the prevailing torrent, by op-
pofing that fpirit of irreligion from
which it flows, naturally feeks for
protection in a lineal defcendant of
that illuftrious Martyr, theRefcuer,
in his age, of his country from in-
famy*, who endeavoured to extin-
guifh the flames of the firft Refor-
mation with his blood, and whofc
Chriftian ufe of the great talents,
with which he was entrufted, has
proved
* Sir Thomas More.
nrn
( vii )
proved, that men are not always
wicked in proportion to the means
they have of being fo,
There is danger, Madam, to all
that is rational and good, from too
much fpeculation and refinement,
as well as from flupid ignorance.
Hence the Apoftle of the Gentiles
admonifhes us, not to be more wife
than it behoveth to be wife, but to be
wife unto fobriciy. Rom. xii. 3. In
fpeaking of the antient Philofophers
he had before faid, c. i. v. 21, 22.
that they evaporated * in their own
thoughts. . . . and prof ejjing themf elves
to be wife, they become fools* The
prefent enlightened age, as it is plea-
fed to term itfelf, has reafoned, till
it has hardly a principle left to rea-
fpn upon. Politicians have reform-
ed
* Evanuerunt. Vulg. swrxiufytTM. Gr.
( viii )
ed their political conftitutions, (ill
all the evils of anarchy have poured
in upon them. The fafhionable Re-
ligionifts of the day have reformed
Chriftianity, till they have degraded
Chrift himfelf from his throne, and
worn down his fupernatural religion
to a fy ftem that (lands in need of no
Meiliah at all; and even a great
proportion of Catholics themfelves,
in the prefent day, are evidently
tired of that neceffary confinement
of thought and practice, which is
eflential to their being enclofed in
the one Sheep/old of the one Shepherd >
John x. 16. and pant for every kind
of Reformation, except that of their
morality.
It is now, for the firft time, the
Evangelical Counfels themfelves,
not the abufes of them, are got into
difrepute
difrepute with an infinite number
of Catholics, who have been taught
to confider the obfervers of them
as a ufelefs fet of beings. We now
behold the facred Cloifter invaded,
not by the difciples of Calvin or
Mahomet, but by the profefled chil-
dren of the Church. We fee its
peaceful inhabitants ftripped of their
chartered rights and property, while
the privileges of the State are ex-
tended to Jews and Idolaters: It is
made lawful, in Chriftian countries,
to blafpheme the name of Chrift,
but not to ferve him according to
that plan which he himfelf has
pointed out as the mod perfect, Mat*
xix. 21. and to which fo many thou-
fands of excellent citizens have fa-
crificed their fortunes and their
lives, under the guarantee of the
mod folemn public laws.
The prefent time is alfo marked
by a general combination of Catbo-
b lies
lies for humbling their Mother
Church, in the day of her greateft
diftrefs, and for ilripping her of her
prerogatives, when fhe has hardly
any other left, than thofe flic has
immediately received from the
hands of her divine founder. Hence
\ve now behold the common Father
of the Faithful conftantly held up,
in writing and conversation, to
contempt and hatred, by his own
ipiritual children, and fometimes
even by thofe, who, like myfelf,
have, for years, eaten his material
bread; and this on the fcorc of the
pretended or exaggerated faults of
his predeceffors, ages before we our-
felves were in being. Hence alfo
it is now made a crime of, in the
eftablifhed Paflors of the Church,
to pronounce when her facred rights
are invaded; but this queftion is
referred for a folution to her pro-
feffed enemies. In
XI
It is in this age that a general
difpofition prevails to remove the
land-marksfixedby our fathers, and
that we ftudy to unlearn, in polite
circles, the awkward leffbns we po-
red over in the ponderous volumes
of the Divines and Fathers. The ex-
tent of the imderftandingis now efti-
ated by that of the confcience. He
who trembles to tamper with the fa-
crcd conftitution of Religion, muft
be contented to pafs for a bigotted
narrow-minded man ; while the mod
fuperficial geniufes will lay claim to
fuperior flrength of understanding
on the mere ftrength of their ir-
rcligion. Hence we are told
that Afceticai works, of the prefent
call, are no more than the ravings
of bigotted Myftics; and hence thofe
great and good men, of whom the
zuorld was not worthy, to whofe zeal
Kd conftancy in fuffering we are
b 2 indebted
indebted for the facred depofit of
the orthodox faith, inftead of Mar-
tyrs, as we have hitherto confidered
them, are now proved to have died
Traitors to their country*.
Finally
* See an Anf<wcr to the Bi/hop of Comana*
Pflfloral Letter, by a writer who dates from
Mwrfields, and calls himfelf a Protefti/rg Catho-
lic. In this indecent and inflammatory publi-
cation, the mod bare-faced attempt yet made
fmce the Reformation, to difturb the peace of
Englifh Catholics, the writer aflerts, that the
learned and pious Miffioner Mr. Cadwallador,
who fuffered death at Leominfter in 1610 for
his Prieftly character, but who, like many O T
thers of his profeflion, refufed to fave his life,
by taking the Oath of Allegiance framed by
the artful Bancroft and the apoftate Perkins,
died a material traitor to his country . . . and
jhed his blood for thofe Papal prejudices iue
have all dif claimed by the Oath of 1778. It is
plain this very confident writer was ignorant
that Mr. Cadwallador, as well as Doclor Bi-
fhop
Finally hitherto, we know,the fimple
and unqualified title of Catholic has
been
(hop of Chalcedon, Dean Colleton, the cele-
brated Champney, and other fufferers, for re-
fufing the faid Oath, actually figned in 1602 a
folemn and public Protection of Allegiance,
by which they bound themfelves to fupport
Elizabeth, the reigning Qneen, agaiuft any foreign
Prelate, Prince, or Potentate, in defiance of any
Excommunication the Pope might ijjue againft her,
or againji him, for fa doing. See Dodd, vol ii.
p. 292. Mifs. Pr. vol. ii. p. 17. On what
ground then did thefe pious and learned men,
who, we fee, were no Haves to the above men-
tioned Papal prejudices, principally object to
the faid Oath ? I anfwer ; preclfely on that
ground on which we object to it at the prefent
day, i;/z. the pcrjurj of /wearing the erroneous
doctrine of the depofing po^u^r to be heretical and
damnable. For a proof of the accuracy of this
ftatement, fee our late Ven. Challoners Ac-
count Mifs. Pr. vol. ii. p. 18. and the remark-
able eontroverfy between one of thofe learned
Prierts
C
been the glory of every member of
the Univerfal Church, and has al-
ways been brought forward by the
Ancient Fathers*, as well as by
Modern Controvertifts, as a mark
of the Orthodoxy of that Church,
Priefls and Dr. King Bilhop of London, ibid, p.
75. and Dodd, vol. 2. p. 369. It is plain, thofe
old-fafhioned Divines did not underftand the
morality of fwearing that to be herefy in the
plain and obvious meaning of the *wcrd t which they
underftood to be only materially fo. If any dif-
ficulty is ilarted concerning the popular meaning
of the word Herefy 9 let Johnfon be confulted,
and the authorities he refers to. It behoves us
to take care not to be more afraid of the infamy
than of the guilt of equivocation and deceit !
* St. Tacian fays, " My Name is Chriflian,
" my Surname is Catholic .... the former title
" is my fignature, the latter the proof of my
"right to that fignature." Ep. i. ad Symph.
St. Auguftine alfo fays, Lib. contra Ep. Manir*
" The very name of Catholic. . . keeps me in
" the bofom of the Church."
which
( xv )
which has been able, in all ages, in-
variably to maintain it (imple and
unadulterated. But now it feems
that many of our Brethren are a-
fliamed of it, or at leaft unwilling to
bear it, unlefs it is debafed and bur-
lefqued, for the crooked purpofes
of worldly policy, by being unit-
ed with the diftinftive titles of ac-
knowledged Schifrnatics and He-
retics. Till the prefent day, we
have even ridiculed, in our adver-
faries, the attempt of uniting toge-
ther the incongruous titles, which
we can dill hardly pronounce with-
out a fmile, of Protejlant Catholics
and Orthodox Dijfenters*.
In fhort that man mufl be blind
indeed, or deeply infeQted with the
prevailing contagion, who does not
fee
i
* The words Heterodox: and DiJJenter have
: a<ftly the fame radical meaning.
xv
fee that a fpirit of irreligion and
immorality keeps pace with the
prefentrage for innovation, and that
at no period, during near eighteen
hundred years the Church has exift-
ed, (he has worn fo melancholy an
afpecl; as at the prefent moment.
But he that has promifed to abide
with his Church all days even to the.
confummation of the world, Mat.
xxviii. 20. has alfo aflured us, that
fcandah mujl necejfarily c6me; Mat.,
xviii. 7. as he foretold the encreafe
fo he alfo foretold the decreafe of
faith, Luke xviii. 8. previous to that
great day when hejliall come -with his
fan in his hand, and Jliall thoroughly
cleanfe his floor, gathering the wheat
into the barn, but burning the chaff
-with unquenchable fire, Mat. iii. 12.
ihenJJiall he prefent the Church to
himfelf a glorious* Church, not having
Jfot or wrinkle. Eph. v. 27.
In
( xvii )
In the defcription I have juft gi-
ven of the temper of the times,
which, I would to God any one
could prove to be unfounded or
exaggerated in a fingle particular,
there are two charges implied, which
I feel myfelf obliged to meet, in a
more direct manner, one that affects
the writings, the other the profeflion
of the Saint, whofe work I am giving
to the Public. I have fuppofed the
following treatife, fo far fram fuiting
the tafte of many modern Catholics,
will be the fubjeQ: of their ridicule.
But in oppofition to this, I will ven-
ture to aflert, that, as far as we can
pronounce on the opinion of the
Church, where no formal decifion
has taken place, there are perhaps
no writings, that have been more
pointedly or more ftrongly approved
c of
of by this unerring Judge, than thofe
of St. Terefa. Her fpirit of prayer,
and the chara&er of her afcetical
works, were not only examined and
approved of by the mod eminent
Divines of the age, but alfo by a
conftellation of her holy contempo-
raries, fuch as St. Francis Borgia,
St. Peter of Alcantara, St. John of
the Crofs, and St. Lewis Bertrand,
who were the bcft, becaufe they
were experimental judges of the
excellency of her heavenly dottrine;
for fo it is flyledby the Church, as I
obferved before, in the prayer in-
ferted in her public liturgy, after a
fecond examination of our Saint's
fpirit and writings had taken place.
It is due to St. Terefa here to men-
tion, that it was not in compliance
with her own inclination, but in
confornJtv
conformity with the exprefs orders
of her Superiors, (he wrote the fe-
vcral edifying treatifes fhe has left'
behind her. How little there was of
art or ftudy in our Saint's writings,
and to what degree they were the
fpontaneous overflowings of her
devotion, may be gathered from the
extraordinary circumftance related
of them, that in the original ftill
extant, there is not a fingle erafure
to be found, and likewife from the
following authentic account to be
fecn in the a fore fa id Saints lives,
vol. x.p. 377. " One night, whillt
" fhe was writing thefe very medita-
(t lions, a Nun came into her cell,
" and fat by her a good while in
" great admiration, beholding her,
<f as it were, in an enraptured ftate,
f holding a pen in her hand, but
c 2 often
tc often interrupting her writing,
" laying down her pen, and fetch-
" ing deep fighs : her eyes appeared
" full of fire, and her face ihone
" with a bright light, fo that the
" Nun trembling with awe and re-
(i fpeft, went (Hit again, without
" being perceived by the Saint."
The defence of the Religious pro-
feffion, now fo much attacked, and
everywhere attacked with impunity,
I owe not only toourSaint,whowasfo
eminent a propagator of it; but alfo
to the Lady I am now addrefling,
who, like our Saint, has facrificed to
it all her worldly profpefts, when
placed in the dazzling funfhine of
youth. But when I profefs myfelf
the advocate of this (late, it is only,
where it is embraced upon proper
njotives, and where the fpirit of it
is
is pi
xx
s properly preferved, as envy itfelf
muft allow to be the cafe, with regard,
Madam, to your pious Community,
and to the edifying inhabitants of
our Englifh Convents in general.
The only clamor that is, or can be,
raifed againfl perfons of this de-
fcription, is, as I have intimated a-
bove, that they are of no ufe to the
world. I might here enter into a
juft and ferious enquiry, of what
ufe to the world the generality of
thofe perfons are, in whofe mouths
this objection is more frequently
found, and for what beneficial pur-
pofes their time from morning till
night is profefledly fpent. But,
leaving that enquiry to their own
confciences, I anfwer, if we are
Chriftians, we muft be convinced
that the falvation of our fouls is the
firft
( xxii )
firft law of nature; now if, amidft
the incentives to vice, with which
the world abounds, it fhould appear
to certain perfons, that a life of re-
tirement and celibacy is neceffary,
or even ufeful, for this end, while
fuch perfons are obedient to the
laws of the Community, and court
not its emoluments, why fhould not
they be permitted to do that for
virtuous purpofes, which others are
free to do for purpofes of
vice ?
I am far however from allowing
that Religious perfons, who poffefs
the true fpirit of their calling, are
of no advantage to the world. On
the contrary, If we have faith hit as
a grain of mujlard-feed, Mat. xvii.
19. we muft allow, that they are a
public benefit and bulwark, were it
only
( xxiii )
only on account of the prayers,
which they unceafingly pour forth
for the temporal and eternal welfare
of others. Scripture tells us, that
the conflant prayer of the jujl man
availe ill much y Jam. v. 16. and there
can be no doubt but, at the great
day of retribution, the merit of many
a fplendid converfion, and of other
good works, will betaken from thofe,
who were the immediate inflru-
mcnts in performing them,and given
to certain fouls, who are now hidden
in impenetrable obfcurity : there can
be no doubt alfo, but that, it is for
the fake of fuch fouls as thefe, who
are held up by worldlings, not only
as ufelefs beings, but alfo as a para-
lie of reproach, -whofe life feemetk
madnefij and their end, without honor;
Wild. v. 3. the judgments of God
( xxiv }
are fufpended over the heads of
thefe very worldlings. Little did
the two hundred and feventy five
fellow-voyagers of St. Paul fufpecl:,
it was for the fake of him, a reputed
criminal in chains, that their lives
were fpared. Ads xxvii. Sodom it-
felf would have been faved, had
there been but ten juft perfons in
it. Gen. xviii. And Chrifl promi-
fed, that thofe days of defolation he
fpoke of in St Mat. xxiv. 22. mould
be fhortened, on account of the
Your profeffion, Madam, is not
ufelefs to the Chriftian world, while
you continue to edify it by your
example. It is of the utmoft con-
-fequence to the caufe of Chriftia-
nity, fo intimately connecled with
the temporal welfare of mankind,
that
( XXV )
4hat Religion fhould be prote&ed in
its genuine perfection, and that it
fliould have certain retreats, where
it may exert its full influence, the
thorns being, as it were, plucked up
that ufually prevent its due growth.
Now it would be madnefs to fay,
that the retirement of the Cloiftcr
has nor, in all ages, been found
more favorable for this purpofe
than a fituation amidft the cares, and
riches, and pleafures of this life. Luke
vi. .14. Corrupted as we are by
our mutual intercourfe, and by the
infatuating cuftoms, language and
amufements of the world, there is
reafon to fear we might think the
fublime and felf-denying morality
of the Gofpel to be mere matter of
fpeculation, and Platonic reveries,
did not we fee it frequently realized
d by
( xxvi )
by the heroic facrifices and conducl/
chiefly of thofe who have retired to
breathe the pure air of the Cloifter,
and with Mary have chofcn the better
fart.
Finally, Madam, your Religious
Houfes are not only ufeful, but, I
may fay, neceffary for the proper
education of female youth; at leaft
this is certain with refpeft to the
Catholic female youth of this king-
dom. It is true, the latter are, as a
celebrated Catholic writer of the
prefent day, exprefles it*, the forlorn
hope of the Catholic caufe. In faci
the incentives to libertinifm and ir-
religion are, in this day, fo nume-
rous and violent with regard to the
* See the State and Behaviour of the Englift
Catholics , from the Reformation to the Tear 1780.
p, 1 80.
youth
( xxv ii )
youth of our fex j it would be fo un-
fafhionable and un-gentleman-like,
as well as fo inconvenient, in them,
to betray an awe of the truths of
faith or the precepts of morality,
that it is not extraordinary we
mould place our chief dependance,
for the Religion of the future gene-
ration, on the piety and decorum of
the youth of your lex. But where
are they, with God's affiilance, to
acquire thefe invaluable advantages,
except where their mothers have
acquired them, in the advantages
and fpirit of a Convent educa-
tion ?
The writer I have juft quoted,
who perhaps fometimes deals in pa-
radox, in order to exercife the
powers of his eloquence in render-
ing it plaufible, and who certainly
d 2 poffefles
( xxv iii )
poffeffes a brilliancy of talents fuf-
ficient to enliven the graveil fub-*
jefts, without thofe Tallies of levity,
and fometimes irreligion,with which
he difgraces them ; this writer, I
fay, himfclf of the clerical order,
at the fame time that he allows the
Catholic Ladies, who have been e-
ducated in Convents, to jland un-
rivalled as Wives, Mothers, Citizens,
and Chri/lians*, aflerts, that Nuns are
ill adapted to the bujlnefs of educating
them y and that no mode of education
can be kfs adapted to improve the
mind, and infill fuch principles as may
fcrmit to the biifmefsof life, than thai
which thefe unrivalled ladies have aclu-
ally received. This to me is indeed
a paradox, unlefs we are to under-
* See pages 180, 181. of the above mentioned
un-cqual performance.
{land
Hand lite
( xxix )
Land literally, what this Gentleman
advances concerning the too great
partiality of nature in having be-
llowed more elements upon the
Catholic Ladies than fell to their
fhare, and which therefore may be
fuppofed to have fupplied for the
defects of their education. But,
jetting apart; I would afk this in-
telligent Author, whether in the
many Convents he is acquainted
with, fome of which are ornament-
ed with his own neareft relatives,
there are not Ladies now under the
veil every way equal to thofe in the
world; Ladies,who,with firft-rate ta-
lents, have had every opportunity of
improvement and obfervation,which
an elevation of birth and fituatiot
could afford? and whether thefe are
pot the perfons to whom the de-
partment
( XXX )
partment of education is rnoftly af-
figned in our Convents ? But the
principal queftion I wifh to afk him
is, what thofe principles are which
he confiders as requifite to form the
female mind for the dif charge of the
important duties of Wife, Mother,
Citizen and Chrijlian, and which a
Convent ^education cannot inftil ?
and whether he wiflies to fubftitute
the elegant Boarding Schools of the
day, with all their fund of fafhion-
able knowledge, inflead of our an-
tiquated Cloifters ? As far as I can
judge, the above mentioned princi-
ples lie within a very narrow com-
pafs, and are precifely thofe which
the Convent education is peculi-
arly calculated to inftil ; they may
be comprized in a word, a facred
attachment to religion and mora-
lity.
xxxi )
lity. It is evidently impoflible to
conceive a Lady, in any of the a-
forefaid fituations, to be deficient
in her duty, on whofe mind virtue
and piety have taken this firm hold.
As to that knowledge of the world
which is requifite for the due ex-
ercife of thefe qualities; when it
becomes neceffary, we know it is
very foon acquired ; and to learn
it prematurely, is evidently to rifk
the -'attainment of the qualities them-
felves. The Author feems to al-
low the neceflity of excluding the
incentives to vice and folly, and of
retiring from public notice till maturer
age has ripenedjemale virtue tofccure
perfection) and even afcribes to this,
as a caufe, that merit, of which it is
evidently only a condition. But
where is this leflbn praftifed, where
can
f xxxii )
can it generally be pradifed, ex-
cept within the Convent walls ?
The modern improvers of female
education mew themfelves ignorant
of the diftin&ive characlers of the
fexes, no wonder the errors of their
plan mould appear in the un-
exampled immorality of their fa-
fhionable pupils. It is folid virtue,
and unaffecled piety, not the trivial
accomplishments of the age, that
are calculated to promote die good
of mankind, and to form domeftic
happinefs; thefe are what all the
world feek for in thofe they are
connected with, however deftitute,
of thefe qualities they are them-
felves. The greateft accomplifh-
ment a truly refpeclable woman
can now have, is to be totally igno-
rant
( xxxiii )
rant of one half of modern female
accomplifhments.
Perfevere then, Madam, in the
plan, which even thofe who declare
themfelves its enemies, allow to
have been hitherto fuccefsful. Con-
tinue to imprint deeply in the
minds of thofe, who have the happi-
nefs of being educated under your
care, the fear of God, and a horror
of the reigning vices and tempta-
tions of the world. Make them
fenfible that virtue forms the bafis
of female merit; and that modefty
adds to it its moft attractive charm ;
Finally, that Piety is ufeful for all
things having the promife of the life,
that is ?iow, and of that 'which is te
come, i Tim. iv. 8.
I remain
(' xxxiv )
I remain, with the fincereft re-
fpeft, and with the greateft confU
dence in your good prayers,
MADAM,
Your moft obedient and faithful
Servant in Chrifl,
JOHN MILNER*
St. Peter 9 s-Houfe> Winchejler,
April 15, 1790.
THE
EXCLAMATIONS
T H E S O U L TO GOD. &c.
EDITATION I.
The Complaint of a Soul, by reafon
of her Dijlance from God, in this
mortal Life.
How does this life of mine
ifift, at a diftance from him who
is my true life ? What am I doing ?
What am I capable of doing, in this
(late of feparation from my God?
Alas! I can do nothing but what is
made up of fin and imperfection.
What reft can my foul find in the
tempeftuous fea of this world ? I
B bewail
bewail my prefent mifery, but I be-
wail ftill more my former condition
when I lived exempt from forrow.
O Lord, how fweet are thy ways !
yet who can walk in them without
fearful anxiety ? I dare not live
without endeavouring to fcrve thee,
and when I attempt to acquit my-
felf of this duty, overpowered by
the immenfity of my obligations
to thee, I find nothing that is
worthy of thy acceptance. I feena
defirous of fpending myfelf in thy
fervice; but when I look well to
the miferable ftate I am in, I feel
myfelf incapable of all that is good,
unlefs thou art pleafed firfl to be-
ftow it upon me.
O my gracious and moft merci-
ful God, what mall I do to corre-
fpond with the great things thou haft
wrought in my behalf! All thy
works
( 3 )
works are holy, juft, infinitely im-
portant, and full of heavenly wif-
dom, fince thou \vho performed
them, art the EfTential Wifdom ;
neverthelefs I experience that while
my underftanding employs itfelf
in contemplating thefe works, my
affections are reftrained from in-
dulging themfelves in the uncon-
fined manner they defire in the
fweet exercife of loving thee: In
this flate, the former drives in vain
to reach thee in thy inacceffible
grandeur, and the latter to enjoy
thee in the ftreight prifon of this
mortal body. Hence every exte-
rior objecl becomes irkfome and
painful to my foul, although at a
former period, O my God, I am
forced to acknowledge, that the
federation of thy greatnefs, by
ich flic was enabled to eftimate
B 2 her
f 4 )
her own littlenefs and imperfe&ion,
was of fignal fervice to her.
Eut why do I repeat all this, O
my God ? Whom am I complaining
to, or who elfe hears me except
thou my Father and my Creator?
And what need is there of words
to thee, who fo manifeftly refideft
in the centre of my foul? Such is
my weaknefs. But alas, O my God,
how am I allured of this ? How do
I know that I am not at this moment
deprived of thy grace ? O this life
of mine, which mud neceffarily con-
tinue in uncertainty, concerning a
thing of fuch infinite importance,
as the poffeffion of God's favor.
What is there deferable in it, Tince
the only advantage it poffefles, that
of pleafmg God in all things, is in
itfelf of fo uncertain and precarious
a nature ?
ME DI-
MED
E D I T A T I O N II.
On the Pain a Soul fiiffcrs, that loves
God y between her impatience of
pojfejfing him, and her Defire of
benefiting other Souls.
i
Oftentimes think, O my God,
that if any thing can render life
fupportable to my foul in this ftate
of her banifhment, it is folitude, be-
caufe this enables her to repofe in
thee, who art her only refting place,
yet the incapacity me experiences
to enjoy thee in that perfect manner
Ihe wifhes, often turns this pleafure
into pain: but O! how delicious is
this very pain, when compared with
the irkfomenefs of converfing with
creatures ? But tell me, my God,
how it is, that even this delicious
folitude
( 6 )
folitude wearies a foul that reliflies
no pleafure but in thee, when (he is
called upon to ferve her fellow-
creatures. O omnipotent love of
God, how different are thy effefts
from from thofe of carnal love ! The
latter is fearful of any other perfons
being inflamed with the fame paflion,
leaft it mould lofe fomething it
was pofleffed of, but the love of my
God receives new pieafure and a
frefli encreafe in proportion to the
number of companions it meets with
in this fweet exercife ; and, on the
other hand, it is a bitter allay to its
felicity, that any mould be found
who are ftrangers to this delight.
This, O my fupreme Good, is the
caufc, that even thy fweeteft confo-
lations and carefles overwhelm thy
fervants with grief in the moment
of their enjoying them, while they
reflea
( 7 )
refleft on the great number of
Chriftians that (light thefe pleafures
fct prefent, and fhall be deprived of
them for ever hereafter. Hence
thy fervants earneftly feek to make
others partakers of their felicity,
and willingly part with the delights
they themfelves experience in order
to bring others to an acquaintance
with them. But would it not be
belter, O my heavenly Father, on
thefe occalions, to poflpone this
anxious concern for others to a mo-
ment of lefsconfolation and delight,
anJ to employ the prefent happy
time entirely in the love and enjoy-
ment of thee ! O my Jefus, how
great is the love thou beareft to the
children of men, fince thou art
pleafed, that the mod acceptable
fervice we can offer thee, fhould
cgniiil in quitting thy company in
order
( 8 )
order to benefit them, and that this
fhould even be the mod perfeft
manner of enjoying thee! It is
true, the feelings of the foul are
lefs delicious at thefe times, yet
Ihe comforts herfelf in the accomp-
limment of thy bleffed will; and
fhe is moreover convinced, that
however exquifite and divine the
confolations fhe enjoys in this mor-
tal life may appear, they are all
uncertain andfufpicious, if they are
not accompanied with thy favourite
virtue, the love of our neighbour.
Whoever loves not his neighbour,
loves not thee, O God; and how
dear each one of us is to thee, the
torrents of blood thou haft fhed
for him will beft declare.
MEDL.
( 9 )
MEDITATION III.
Sentiments of a Penitent Soul in the
Confideration of her Sins, and of
the Mercies of God.
w
HEN I rcflea,O my God,
on the glory thou haft prepared for
thofe who perfevere in thy holy
fervice, on the labors and pains thy
eternal Son has endured to purchafe
this glory for us, on our abfolute
unworthinefs of it, and on the ingra-
titude it would imply to neglect
correfponding with that love which
has exerted itfelf in fo wonderful
a manner in our regard, when I
confider all this, my foul is over-
whelmed with affli&ion. For how
is it poffible, O Lord, that mankind
fhould forget a]l this,- as they prove
by their readinefs to offend thce?
How is it poffible they fhould for-
get themfelves and their own inte-
reft in the manner they do ? But
fuch, O my Redeemer, is the ex-
cefsofthy bounty, that in the very
moment in which we deftroy our
own fouls by aiming a mortal blow
at thee, thou art mindful of us, thou
overlookeft our ingratitude, thou.
ftretcheft out thy hand to preferve
us, thou awakeneil us from our
dreadful phrenfy, and teacheft us to
petition thee for the remedy of our
evils. O! blefled be this gracious
Lord, bleffed be his infinite mercy,
bleffed for all eternity be his tender
compaffion. O my foul, do thou
for ever blefs this adorable God.
How can any Chriftians be found
to rebel againft him! O, how does
their ingratitude (land condemned
by
by the excefs of his goodnefs! Do
thou, my Saviour, put a final (lop
to this ingratitude.
O ye Sons of Men, how long will
you continue to be hard of heart?
How long will you ftand in oppofi-
tion to your meek and loving Sa-
viour? What means this folly?
Can you continue to oppofe him to
:he end? No, this cannot be; for
i.he life of man decays like the
Bowers of the field, and the Son of
ii.he Virgin fhall finally come to pro-
nounce the dreadful fentence of
your eternal fate. O my omnipo-
tent God, fiace, whether we are wiL
iiing or IKH, thou mull be our judge,
why do not we confider before-
ha 1, how much it imports us to
render thee propitious to us againft
that hour of terror? And yet, after
twho would wifh, my God, to
C 2 have
( '2 )
have any other judge of his fate than
thee ? Thrice happy they who, at
that dreadful time, (hall be enabled
to fejoice with thee!
O my Lord and my God, how is
it that a Chriftian, whom thou haft
raifed from the abyfs of fin, who
fees the miferable condition to which
he had reduced himfelf for a momen-
tary fatisfaclion, and who is refol-
ved, by the afliftance of thy grace,
which is never wanting to thofe
who love thee, and who perfevere
in petitioning for the gift of an in-
violable fidelity to thee, how is it
that fuch a one can by any means
fupport life! How can he avoid
dying with grief at the reflection
of what he loft in lofing his baptif-
mal innocence! The happieft life
that fuch a Chriftian can lead, is to
be continually dying with this re-
flection.
( 13 )
flection. Yet by what means can a
foul, that tenderly loves thee, fup-
port itfelf in this ftate ? Alas, my
God, whither are my thoughts
ftraying! Can I then forget that
thou earned into the world to re-
deem finners ? Can I forget, at how
dear a price thou haft redeemed
them ? Yes, my Saviour, thou haft
expiated my falfe pleafures by real
pains and bloody ftripes ? Thou haft
cured my interior blindnefs by the
hood-winking of thy facred eyes,
and thou haft atoned for my vain-
glorious thoughts, by the fharp and
cruel thorns with which thy blefled
head was crowned. O my Lord,
my deareft Lord, the confideration
of all this torments the more a foul
that loves thee : the only confola-
tion I find under this reflection is,
that thy mercy {hall be the more
extolled,
( 14 )
extolled, in proportion as my \vick-
ednefs lhall hereafter bejmore fully
discovered. Yet fhall not this tor-
ment ever entirely ceaie, until, with
every other rnifery of this mortal
life, it fhall be forgotten in the fight
and enjoyment of thee.
MEDITATION IV.
A Prayer, that God would enable us
to redeem the Time -we have fpent
ciherwife than in his love and
fervice.
i
T feems, O my God, that my
foul enjoys a certain repofe in the
confederation of the joy it fhall ex-
perience, if through thy mercy it
fhould come to the poffeffion of
thee; but, in the mean time, it is
my
( 15 )
my earned defire toferve thee, fmcft
it was by ferving me thou haft ac-
quired that happinefs which I hope
to enjoy. What fhall I now do, O
my Lord? What mall I do? for
alas, too late do I experience this
defire of ferving thee, notwithftand-
ing that in the earlieft part of my
life thou didft feek to gain me, and
didft call upon me to give myfelf
entirely to thee. But haft thou
ever yet rejetled any foul, on ac-
count of its mifery ? Or haft thou
turned a deaf ear to any one that
called for thy mercy ? Have any
limits yet been found for the ex-
tent of thy goodnefs and thy
power ? Now then, O my moft
merciful God, is the time to
difplay thefe attributes in regard to
this thy fupplicating fervant, by in-
fpiring me with a contrition for the
I loft
( 16 )
lofs of fo much precious time as I
have mifpent in my paft life, and in
enabling me, O my God, to redeem
it. Itmayfeem a folly to afk this
favor of thee, fince every one
agrees, that paft time cannot be
recovered. But blefled be thou,
my God and my Saviour, whofe
power is infinite, and to whom no-
thing is of courfe impoflible, do
thou only will it, my God, do thou
only will it, and however imperfect
is my faith, I believe it will be
done. The more I reflect on the
wonders thou haft performed, and
the ftill greater thou art capable of
performing, the more is my faith
ftrengthened, and the greater con-
fidence do I entertain of thy grant-
ing the requeft I make at prefent.
But after all what is there extraor-
dinary in any thing that proceeds
from
from an Almighty Power ? Thou
knoweft, O my God, that in all my
fpiritual mifery I was never wanting
in acknowledging the greatnefs of
thy power and mercy. Have re-
gard to the grace thou haft be-
ftowed upon me in preferving me
from offending thee at leait in this
particular. Recover then for me,
O God, the time I have loft, by
beftowing on me a more plentiful
effufion of thy grace, fo that, late as
it is, I may yet provide, again ft thy
coming, that nuptial garment which
is neceffary to entitle me to a feat
at thy heavenly banquet. If thou
wilt, O Lord, this (hall certainly
be done.
D MED I-
MEDITATION V.
On Martha's complaint of Mary>
Luke, c. x. and how jujlly a foul
that loves God may complain to him
of her prefent mijeries.
o
My cleared Lord, how can that
foul, which has been fo ungrateful to
thee, and has made fo bad a ufe of
pad favors, prefume to demand
frefh favors at thy hands ? Can that
perfon be trufted, whofe treachery
has been fo often proved before ?
But what then fliall I do in thefe
extremities, O thou comfort of the
afflitled, and refuge of thofe who
put their trufl in thee? Had I
better conceal my wants, until thou
thyfelf malt, unfolicited, relieve
them? No, moft certainly, becaufe
thou,
( '9 )
thou, my Lord, and my Delight,
knowing how numerous, and how
prefting they are, and likewife the
confolation it affords me to bewail
them in thy prefence, haft com-
manded us, on all Rich occafions,
to offer up our petitions to thee,
with a full affurance of thy granting
what we afk for.
I fometimes think of the com-
plaint which holy Martha made to
thee; for fhe feems to me, not fo
much to have blamed her fifter, as
to have lamented, that thou
didft not attend to the pains fhe
took to pi cafe thee, and that thou
didfl not Teem defirous of her con-
tinuing near thy divine perfon.
She probably thought fhe was not
fo much beloved by thee as her
er was, and fhe certainly mufl
e been much more fenfible of
D 2 this
this misfortune, than of the pains it
coft her in ferving thee who wert
fo dear to her. For this her love
of thee could not but render fuch
labors delightful to her. This ap-
pears farther, from her not ad-
dreffing herfelf to her filter, but
only to thee, O Lord; her love em-
boldening her to afk of thee, If thou
had/I ,nd care of her? Thy anfwer
alfo points out the purport of her
complaint, in giving her to under-
ftand, that it is love alone which
gives a value to whatever we do,
and that the one thing necejfary is to
love thee in fuch manner, as that no-
thing may ever interrupt the exer-
cifeof this Jove.
But how can we obtain a love
that fhall correfpond with what we
owe to our beloved ? It is impoffi-
blq, O my God, except our love be
united
united with and draw its merit from
that infinite love which thou beareft
us. Shall I then complain, with
this holy woman, that thou doft not
fufHciently love and regard me?
Alas, my God, I have no caufe for
fo doing; on the contrary, I have
ever experienced much flronger
and more wonderful proofs of thy
love than I have even known how to
afk for or defire. If I ought to
complain of any thing, it mould he
that thy mercy has been too great
in bearing with my ingratitude.
What then can fo miferable a wretch
as I am afk of thee, unlefs it be,
according to the fentiment of the
great St. Auguftine, that thou
wouldft give me before-hand what-
ever I am to re-pay to thee; for
thus only can I fatisfy, for the
fmalleft part of the immenfe debt I
owe thee. Remember, O m)
Creator, that I am the workmanfhip
of thy hands, teach me to kno\v
thee in order that I may love thee.
MEDITATION VI.
How tedious life is to a foul that ar-
dently defires to be united to her God.
Thou Lord of all things, my
Delight and my God, how long fhall
I continue languifhing to behold
thee ? What comfort can be afford-
ed that foul which has learned to
relifh no other but what it finds in
thee? O this long life! this tedious
life! this dying life, which I lead
hereupon earth ! What a loncfome
exile is it, and how deftitute of all
comfort! How long, O Lord, how
long (hall it endure! What, O my
fovercign
( "-3 )
fovereign Good, fay, what fhall I do
w hi 1ft it continues ? Shall I wifh
to be delivered from this ardent de-
lire of enjoying thee that torments
me? O my Creator and my God,
Thou doft give wounds that want
no cure, thou doft ftrike without
bruiting, thou doft kill, and thereby
beftow new life, in fine, thou doft
aft in all things conformably to the
infinitude of thy power, it is thy
pleafure,that this contemptible worm
of the earth fhould be the fubject
of fuch ftrange contrarieties! Be it
fo then, my God, fince thou haft fo
ordained it, for I defire nothing but
that thy will may be done in all
ngs. But alas, my Creator,
extreme grief makes me fpeak and
complain of that which admits of
no remedy, till thou (halt pleafe to
R)vide one. It is true, my foul,
pent
pent up in clofe bondage, ardently
fighs for her deliverance, but even
this flie only defires in conformity
with thy bleiTed will. Let this pain,
Lord, encreafe on earth, by en-
creafingmy love of thee, or elfe af-
ford me a cure for it in the fight of
thee in heaven.
O Death! O Death! where is
the Chriftian that fears thee, fince
thou alone art the gate of life ? But,
alas, how can that Chriftian avoid
fearing thee, who has paffed the
greateftpart of his life devoid of the
fear and love of his God? And
Cnce I am confcious of being in
that fituation, what is it I pray for
in praying for my death ? What do
1 aflc for, but perhaps for the pu-
nimment I have deferred by my
fins ? But O thou my only Good,
do thou avert this heavy doom from
me
me, to redeem me from which thou
haft paid fo dear a price. And do
thou, O my foul, abandon thyfelf to
the holy vili of God, fince this is
evidently thy wifeft courfe. Serve
him during his good pleafure, and
truft that he will deliver thee from
the pains of this exile, when by due
penance thou flialt have obtained
the pardon of thy fins: do not look
for enjoyment till thou haft merited
it byfuffering: but alas, thou my
true Lord and only King, I am ut-
terly incapable even of this, unlefs
thou doft ftrengthen me for this
purpofe by thy grace : for with thy
grace I can do all things.
M E D I-
( 26 }
MEDITATION VII.
On the infinite Goodncfs of God, zoho
teflifies, that his delight is to be with
the children of men.
o
Thou my true Lord, and only
Hope, my Father, my Brother, and
rny Creator, how docs my foul over-
flow with joy at that comfortable
affurancc then hall given us, that
thy delight is to be with the children of
men! Prov. viii. 31. How effectual
are thefe words, O thou fovereign
Lord of heaven and earth, to difpel
every darkforne cloud of defpair
from the minds of finners ! Is it for
the want of an object o thy divine
complacency, that thou art delighted
with fo mean and filthy a worm as I
am ? No, my God, thou haft pro-
claimed
claimed from heaven, at the baptifm
of thy Son, that in him thou art well
pleafed, Mat. iii. 17. &c, doft thou
then put us upon a footing with
him? O incomprehenfible mercy!
O aftonifhing favor, fo far tranfcend-
ing our defcrts! Can we mortals
ever forget it? O my God, thou
who knoweft all things, knoweft my
mifery, and how capable I am of
this ingratitude; but do thou mer-
cifully prevent it. And now, my
foul, let us think, how great love
and complacency the eternal Fa-
ther conceives in the contemplation
of his co-eternal Son, and the Son
reciprocally in the contemplation
of the Father; think, at the fame
time, of the inflamed ardor with
which the Holy Ghoft is united to
the Father and the Son, in the con-
templation of them; and how thefe
E 2 three
( 28 )
three ineffable perfons are infepa-
rably united in this mutual contemp-
lation and love, becaufe they are
the fame undivided Deity. Thefe
adorable perfons mutually know,
mutually love, and mutually de-
light in each other. What need
then have they of my love ? Tell
me, O my God, why thou doft de-
fire to have it, or what benefit it is
of to thee ? Bleffed be thou, O my
God, bleffed be thou for ever,
blefled be thou by aH thy creatures,
world without end, becaufe there
is neither end nor meafure in thee,
or in thy divine perfe&ions. Re-
joice, O my foul, that thy God is
loved as he deferves to be loved,
in as much as his own infinite per-
fe&ions are the objccl of his infi-
nite knowledge and complacency.
Thank him, that even here on earth
he
he has been worthily known and
loved by his divine Son. Under
his protection thoti mayeft approach
the divine Majefty, and prefume to
befeech him that, fince he deigns
to delight in thee, the whole circle
of created beings may not have
power to prevent thee from de-
lighting in him, and rejoicing in his
infinite perfections, and that he is fo
worthy to be loved and praifed by
all his creatures. Beg of him alfo,
that he would enable thee to con-
tribute, in fome degree, to the
fanclification of his holy name, and
that thou mayeft be enabled to re-
peat, in the fincerity of thy heart,
with the blefled Virgin, My foul doth
magnify and praife the Lord. Luke
i. 46.
M E D I-
MEDITATION VIII.
A Prayer for Sinner^ who are fo in-
Jenfible of /heir blindnefs y that they
do not even dejire to be enlightened.
o
My Lord and my God, how
truly haft thou the words of eternal
life> John vi. 6g. wherein we may
find whatever we ftand in need of,
if we will but be at the pains of
fearching for it. But what wonder
is it, if we forget thy facred words,
in that ftate of folly and fpiritual
rnifery into which our fins have caft
us ? O my God, thou Creator of
the Univerfe, in whofe prefence all
that thou haft yet created is no-
thing in comparifon with what thou
art able to create : Thou, omnipo-
tent Crod, who canft do infinitely
more
more than I am able to underftand,
make me the fubjecl of thy infinite
power, and grant that thy words
may never be. effaced from my
mind. Thou has fa id, Come to me
all you that labor and are oppreffed y
and I will rcjre/h you. Mat. xi. 28.
What can we wifh for, what can we
a(k for more than thou haft here
promifed us? and why are world-
lings loft but for feeking, elfewhere
than in thee, for their comfort and
repofe? Alas, my God, how wretched
and blind are thofe who feek for
repofe out of thee? Have compaf-
fion, O Lord, on the creatures thou
haft made: Remernber that we are
ftrangersto ourfelves, that we know
not what we wifh for, and that we
wander far from the happinefswe are
in fearch of. Give light, O God, to
I: fouls. We are in a ftill more
deplorable
( 3* )
deplorable ftate of blindnefs than the
man born blind was, whom we read
of in the Gofpel : for he earneftly
wiftied and prayed for his fight,
but we are in total darknefs, and
are contented to remain fo. How
defperate, alas, is our condition !
Here, O my God, is need, at the
fame time, of thy omnipotent power,
and of thy inexhauilible mercy.
Thou Lord of my heart, and only
true God, how great a favor do I
now prefume to afk thee ! It is no
other than that thou wouldft deign
to love thofe who do not love thee,
that thou wouldft open to thofe who
do not fo much as knock, and that
thou wouldft afford a cure to thofe
who are delighted with their malady,
and who ftudioufly endeavour to
encreafe it. Thou haft faid, my
God, that thou didft come on earth,
to
( 33
to call f inner s y Mat. ix. 16. Thefe,
O Lord, are in the ftri6l fenfe fin-
ners. Do not have regard to our
blindnefs, but cafl thine eyes on the
ftreams of blood thy Son has poured
forth for our falvation. Make the
light of thy mercy mine forth
through the thick cloud of our
finful paflions. Confidfer us, O
God, as the work of thy hands,
and fave us for thy mercy's and
unty's fake.
MED I-
MEDITATION IX.
Another Prayer to God for thofe in-
fatuated fouls, who are not deferous
of being delivered from their fpi-
tual maladies.
o
GOD, whofe companion and
love for my foul is fo great, thou
haft alfo faid, JJanycnethirJly let him
come to me and drink, John vii. 37.
Alas, how can thofe avoid being
thirfty who are burning with the
flames of worldly paflions ? and
what copious draughts do they re-
quire to prevent their being totally
confumed ? I know thy bounty is
fuch, that thou wilt not refufe, even
to thefe, thy heavenly water; thou
haft promifed it, and thy words can
never fail. But if, alas, from long
habit
( 35 )
habit, they do not perceive the heat
of thefe flames, but rather cherifh
themfelvcs with i^ if they have
fo far loft their reafon, as to be in-
fenfible of their miferable condi-
tion, what remedy, O my God, is
left for them ? Neverthelefs thou
art come into the world to remedy
even fuch defperate maladies as
thefe are. Enter then, O Lord, up-
on this work at prefent. It is in
fuch deplorable cafes of mifery that
the greatnefs of thy mercy will ap-
pear. Confider that thefe thy ene-
mies are making daily advances in
their finful career. Have pity on
thofe who have no pity on them-
felves, and fince they are fo defpe-
rately miferable as not to defire to
come to thee, do thou, O Lord,
Iidefcend to go in fearch of
m. Behold I beg this, in their
name,
( 36 )
name, in the full confidence of their
rifing from the flate of death in
which they lie at prefent, as foon as
they lhall enter into themfelves, to
know their own mifery, and to tafte
thy fweetnefs.
O Life, that giveft life to all, give
me alfo of this water, which thou haft
promifed to thofe who afk for it.
Behold I afk for it, my God, and
moft ardently defire to have it, and
I here prefent myfelf before thee in
order to receive it of thee. Do not
withdraw thyfelf from me, lince
thou knoweft how neceffary the folacc
of thy prefence is to afoul that Ian-
guifhes with the love of thee t What
a fubje&of furprize and fear is it,
O my God, to confider the different
kinds of fire that inflame the breafts
of men in this mortal life. The
one
( 37 )
one kind of fire deftroys the foul,
and reduces it, as it were, to afhes;
the other purifies, and renders it
capable of an immortal life, and of
the enjoyment of thee. O wounds
of my Saviour, living fources of
grace, how abundantly do you
overflow for our refrefhment and
prefervation ! How fecurely do
they walk amidft the dangerous
fires of this world, who are ever
careful to refrefh their fouls with the
lacrcd dreams flowing from them!
MEDI-
( 38 )
MEDITATION X.
On the fmall number of the true fer-
vants of God. Another Prayer for
hardened fouls, who refufe to come
forth from thefepidchre of their fins.
GOD of my foul, how forward
are we ever to offend thee, and
how ftill more ready art thou to
forgive us! Whence, O God, can
this daring boldnefs of ours pro-
ceed ? If it is from the knowledge
we have of the greatnefs of thy
mercy, can we be ignorant, that the
extent of thy juftice is proportioned
to it ? Thou haft faid, my God, by
the mouth of thy Prophet, The pains
of death have encompajjed me. Pf.
cxiv. 3. Alas! Alas! how dread-
ful a thing nnift fin then be, -which
was
( 39 )
was capable of caufing torments and
death to a God! and does not this
cruel pcrfecution, O my God, dill
purfue thec ? Where canft thou go
but the fins of men (till attack thee,
and renew thy wounds with mortal
violence ?
O Chriftians, it is at length time
for you to take part with him who is
your King, and to attend upon him
in the general dereliction he expe-
riences : for how frnall is the num-
ber of thofe that remain faithful to
him ! while the multitude, that fol-
lows the ftandard of Satan, is great
beyond conception. But the worft
circumftance of all is, that thofe,
wh^ pretend in public to take part
with Jefus, betray him in private, fo
that he can fcarcely find any in
whom he can confide. O thou,
pur only true Friend, how ill do
Rfuch
( 4 )
fuch traitors requite thy friendfhip
and bounty ! O ye true Chriftians,
whoever you are, join your tears
with thofe of your Saviour, (ince
he did not fhed tears alone for La-
zarus, when he wept over his tomb,
but likewife for all thofe, who,
though called like him, with aloud
voice, yet, unlike him, refufe to quit
the grave of their finful habits. O
thou my fovereign Good, how inti-
mately prefent were my ftns at that
moment to thy mind! but now at
leaft, O my God, I befeech thee,
put a final (lop to their courfe, and
not to the courfe of my fins only,
but to the fins of all mankind. Give
life to all fouls that are dead in fin,
and let thy cry, O my Saviour, be
fo ilrong, and fo efficacious, that it
may give life to them, though they
do not defire this favor, and may
make
make them finally quit the tomb
of their finfal habits. Lazarus
himfelf did not pray to be re-
ftored to life, but thou didft work
this miracle, at the entreaty of a wo-
man that had been a {inner: be-
hold here, O Lord, is a finful wo-
man at thy feet, but much more
loaded with fins than Magdalen
was. Make the greatnefs of thy
mercy, O my God, appear. I afk
this mercy, miferable as I am, for
thofe who will not afk it for them-
felves. Thou knoweft, O my fo-
vereign Lord, how much it afflicts
me, to reflecl on the dreadful tor-
ments they muft for ever endure,
if they are not converted to thee.
O you, who are habituated to the
indulgence of eafe, comfort, and
delight, and who know not what it
is to fuffer the contradiction of your
G will
( 42 )
will in any thing, have pity on
yourfelves. Remember that the day
is coming, which fhall fubje6l you
to the tyranny of the infernal fpi-
rits. Confider well, that the Judge,
who will then condemn your obfti-
nacy, now entreats you to be con-
verted. Reflect, that you are not
fure of a moment of your prefent
life : why then are you fuch enemies
to yourfelves, as to refufe eternal
life hereafter. O the hardnefs of the
hearts of men ! do thou, my God,
foften them, by an effort of that
mercy which knows no bounds.
MED I
( 43 )
MEDITATION XI.
n the dreadful condition of afoul
that, at the moment of death, finds
herfelf condemned to eternal tor-
ments.
My good, my gracious God,
how is my foul overwhelmed with
anguifh, when I reprefent to myfelf,
the condition of one, who, here on
earth, has always been refpe&ed,
beloved, and honored, when at the
inftantof his paffage to the other
world, he fees himfelf utterly loft,
and clearly underftands, that the
torments to which he is doomed
{hall never have an end ! He can-
not now fhut his eyes to the truths
of religion, as he has heretofore
ione. It appears to him, that he was
G 2 fnatched
(44 )
fnatchedfromhisworldly enjoyments,
the very inftant after he had attain-
ed them; fince whatever pafies
with time will then appear to him
momentary. He fees himfelf fur-
rounded with the hideous and piti-
lefs companions of his endlefs mi-
fery. He feels himfelf plunged in-
to that ftinking lake, where the in-
fernal dragons fhall ftrive which
can moft torment him. In fine, he
finds himfelf buried in this dark-
feme abyfs, which affords nothing
but a fmoaky flame, fufficient to
make him fee the objefts of terror
with which he is furrounded.
Alas, how infinitely fhort does
the horror of this defcription fall
of the reality ! and who, O Lord,
has fo blindfolded this unhappy
foul, that (he does not fo much as
perceive this infernal abyfs, till me
finds
I
( 45 )
finds herfelf plunged into it for
ever? Who, O Lord, has -fo fhut
her ears, that fhe has never heard
what has been a thoufand and a
thoufand times repeated to her,
concerning the greatnefs and the
duration of thefe torments ? O ne-
ver-ending life of woe! O torment
without end! O torment without
end! how comes it that thofe who
are foTenfible of pain, as not to be
able to deep on a bed that is harder
than they are accuftomed to, fhould
not be afraid of this extremity of
fufferings ?
O Lord, how do I bewail that
unhappy time, when thefe truths
were hidden from my eyes, as they
are now from the eyes of fo many
others ! but fince thou knoweft my
extreme affli&ion at beholding this
unhappy
( 46 )
unhappy multitude, what I entreat
of thee is, that thou wouldft at leaft
open the eyes of fome one amongft
them, who, by thy grace, may be
enabled to give light to the reft.
I do not afk this favor of thee, for
my own fake, for I am utterly un-
worthy of every favor at thy hands;
but I afk it through the infinite me-
rits of thy beloved Son. Caft thine
eyes, O God, on his wounds, and
fmce he forgave thofe who inflicled
thefe wounds upon him, do thou
alfo, O Lord, forgive the fins we
have committed againft thee.
MEDI-
M
( 47 )
MEDITATION XII.
How timid we are in fer-ving God, and
how bold we are in offending him.
A warm exhortation tojinners to en-
ter into themfelves.
\J My God, and my only Support,
how comes it that, being fo fearful
of confequences in other undertak-
ings, we are only bold and fearlefs
in oppofmg thee? It feems as if all
the children of Adam were confe-
derated in this unnatural warfare.
But were not their reafon darkened
by fin, they would fee the folly of
attacking him who made them, and
of conftantly daring him to combat,
who in a moment could plunge them
into the bottomlefs abyfs. But be-
ing blind as they are, they a& like
madmen
( 48 )
madmen purfuing their deftru&ion,
while they think they are contri-
buting to their welfare, and in fhort
oppofing every maxim of common
fenfe. What remedy is there, O
my God, for thofe who labour un-
der this dreadful infatuation. It is
faid, that frenzy gives ftrength to
the weakeft perfons: fuch at leaft
is the cafe with thefe, O my God,
they are weak in every other at-
tempt, and only ftrong in attacking
thee their beft friend and benefac-
tor.
O incomprehenfible Wifdom,
thou haft need of all that infinite
love thou beared us to fuppcrt fuch
extravagant folly on our part, and
patiently to wait till we return to
our fenfes, whilft, in the mean time,
thou provided a thoufand remedies
to effeclour cure.
It
( 49 )
It fills me with aflonifhment, O
my God, that mankind mould be
found fo deftitute of refolution,
when it is neceffary to break through
the flighted occafion of fin, or to
difengage themfelves from a danger
which expofes them to everlafting
perdition ; for, on thefe occafions,
they think it impoffible to do what
is required of them, even though
they were ever fo much defirous of
it, and yet at the fame time that thefe
men mould be found fo ftrong and
refolute in attacking thy tremen-
dous Majefly by fin. Whence is
it, O my only Good, that they de-
rive this courage? It cannot be
from the captain they follow in this
warfare; for he is thy flave, and
chained down by thee in unquench-
able flames. How can he, that is
himfelf fubdued, infpire others with
H confidence
( 5 )
confidence to wage war againft
thee ? How, on the other hand, can
mortals enlift themfelves in the fer-
vice of fuch a mafter, who being
driven from his celeftial inheritance
fuffers the moft abject flate of want ?
What can he give his followers, who
has no other poffeffion but endlefs
torments? How comes it, O my
Creator, how comes it that we are fo
forward to oppofe thee, and fo
backward in refilling Satan ? for
though we were under no obliga-
to thee, our fovereign Benefa&or,
and, on the other hand, were in-
debted for fomething to the Prince
of Darknefs, yet how could we
bring ourfelves to forfeit the true
and never-failing rewards thou haft
promifed us, for the falfe and delu-
five joys that he holds out to us ?
and what dependance can we place
upon
upon his promifes to us, who has
proved himfelf a traitor to thee ?
O my Lord, how ftrange is our
blindncfs ! O my King, how dread-
ful is our madnefs! O my God,
how intolerable is our ingratitude!
to pay homage to the Devil with the
very gifts of thy bounty ! to requite
thy tender love with beftowing our
affections on him who hates thee,
and fhall hate thee for all eternity!
and, after all the blood thou haft
ilied, the ftripes thou haft born, and
the other bitter torments thou haft
endured for the love of us, inftead
of avenging the caufe of thy hea-
venly Father (for as to thyfelf, O
my Jefus, thou difclaimeft all ven-
geance, and prayeft for thy tormen-
tors) that after all this, I fay, we
fhould affociate ourfeives, and join
with thofe who have thus barba-
H 2 roufly
( 52 )
roufly treated thee! But fince we,
at prefent, follow the fame infernal
chieftain that they do, who can
doubt of our being claifed with
them hereafter, and of our being
the companions of their everlailing
torments ? This muft be the cafe,
unlefs thy mercy, O Lord, inter-
venes, by reftoring us to our fenfes,
and curing us of our folly.
Return then, O ye children of
men, return to yourfelves. Caft
your eyes on this your King, while
yet he is meek, and is difpofed to
treat you with mercy. Ceafe to fin,
and, on the contrary, turn all the
forces of your foul againft that in-
fernal foe who is carrying on a fatal
war againft you, and who is endea-
vouring to rob you of your hea-
venly inheritance. Again I fay to
you, return to yourfelves. Open
your
( 53 )
our eyes, and, with loud cries and
tears, beg light of him who comes
to give it to all the world. In the
name of God reflecl, that by your
fins, you aim at his life, who has
fuffered death to afford life to you,
and who alone defends you from all
your enemies. But if all this is not
fufficient to make you defift from
finning, know that it is in vain you
raife yourfelves up againft his infi-
nite power; and that fooner or
later you muft atone for this con-
tempt and boldnefs in unextinguifh-
able flames. Is it becaufe you fee,
as it were, the hands of this omnipo-
tent Lord tied faft by the love he
bears you that you thus infult him?
What other than this was the con-
dut of his executioners, who firfl
bound him with cords, and then pro-
ceeded
('64 )
ceeded to inflift ftripes and wounds
without number upon him ?
O my God, is it poffible thou
fhouldft endure fo much for thofe
who are fo little fenfible of thy fuf-
ferings! but the day mall come, O
Lord, when thy juftice mail in its
turn be difplayed, and when men
mail fee if it is not equal to thy
mercy. Think of this, Chriftians,
O think of it ferioufly. It is cer-
tain, that we can never comprehend
the extent of our obligations to the
Almighty, nor the infinitude of his
mercy. If then it be true, that his
juftice is every way equal to his
mercy, alas, my God, alas, what mail
become of thofe who have deferved
to experience it in all its extent, and
who mail be the eternal victims of
its feverity !
MED I-
( 55 )
MEDITATION XIIL
On the Iiappinefs of the Saints in hea-
vcn> and on the Jolly of mortals in
preferring falfe pleafures at prefent
to this real felicity hereafter.
o
Ye holy fouls, who now enjoy
compleat felicity in heaven without
the danger of ever lofing it, and
who are for ever abforpt in the prai-
fes of my God, how happy is your
lot! how juft is it that you fhould
inceffantly pour yourfelves forth in
this fweet exercife! how does my
foul envy your happy condition,
freed as you are from the pain of
beholding, on one hand, the offen-
ces that in this wicked world are
each moment committed againft my
God, and the ingratitude of men to-
wards
( 56 )
wards him, and on the other, their
ftupid inattention to the multitude
of fouls which Satan each day pre-
cipitates into hell.
O happy fpirits, that now enjoy
tke blifs of paradife, have compaf-
fion on. our mifery, and intercede
for us to the Almighty, that he would
beftow upon us fome fmall lhare of
your felicity, and that he would
dart upon our fouls one ray of that
divine knowledge with which you
are wholly enlightened. O my
God, make us fenfible how great
the recompence is which thou haft
prepaied forthofe who courageoufly
fight thy battles during the dream
of this mortal life. O ye fpirits,
all inflamed with love, obtain that
we may undei itand, how delightful
an employment it is to you, to look
forward to that eternity of your
enjoyment
( 57 )
enjoyment of God, and to be con-
vinced, that this your happinefs
mall never have an end. How
wretched are we, O my Saviour,
who though we believe thefe truths,
yet for want of reflecting upon them,
are fo habituated to our biindnefs,
that we neither fee them, nor even
wifh to fee them !
Deluded mortals! you who fo
eagerly purfue yourprefent interefl
and pleafurc, fee what you lofe by
your impatience: perhaps, for want
of waiting a fingle year, a fingle day,
a fingle hour, or even a fingle mi-
nute, you facrifice infinite and eter-
nal joys to a wretched momentary
gratification. Alas, my God, how
little confidence do \ve repofe in
thee, fince we refufe to wait fo (liort
a time for the accomplifhment of
thypromifes! and yet, how much
I confidence
I
C 58 )
confidence haft thou placed in us,
in intruding us with the rich
trcafure of thy divine Son,, during
the three and thirty years of his
mortal life, as Hkewife with the
merits of his bitter death on the
crofs ! and thefe benefits, O my
God, thou didft provide for us be-
fore our birth, and notwithftanding
the forcfight thou hadft of the ill
return we fhould make thee for them,
to the end that nothing might be
wanting to us on thy part, towards
making us compleatly rich in hea-
venly treafures.
O ye happy fouls, who have made
fo wife a ufe of thefe ineftimable
treafures as to purchafe with them
an inheritance of everlafting joys,
inftruft us, by your example, to em-
ploy them for the fame blefled pur-
pofe. Obtain for us thefe treafures,
you
C"59 )
you who arc fo near to their founv
tain head : draw for us of this hea-
venly water, O draw for us, \vho
arc here pcrifliing with thirit.
.,
MEDITATION XIV.
the Countenance of Jefus Chrift
at the lajl Judgment, how full of
comfort itjhall be to the juft> and
of terror to the wicked.
USli\
"-
My true Lord and my God, he
who knows thee not loves thee not;
w ferious a truth is this! and
wo to them who do not take pains
to know thee ! The hour of death
is indeed an hour of terror, but how
far more terrible will that lait day
be, when thy juftice fhall be exe-
cuted in its full extent ! O my
1 2 fweet
( 60 )
fweet Saviour, I often think what
comfort and delight thy eyes will
difpenfe to thofe who love thee;
and on whom thou art pleafed to
cad a favorable look. Methinks
one of thefe gracious looks, on
thofe thou art pleafed to confider
as thy own, would be a fufficient
recompenfe for all the years they
may have fpcnt in thy fervice.
How hard, my God, is it to make
thofe comprehend this, who have
never tajled how fwcel the Lord, is!
Think, O Chriftians, think that you
have been raifed to the dignity of
Brethren of Jefus Chrift. Confi-
der him well, and do not defpife
him, for in proportion to the fweet-
nefsoi his afpecl at that great day,
in regard to thofe who love him,
fuch ihall be the terror of his
countenance to thofe who have
oppofed
I
oppofed and perfecuted him, their
Sovereign and their Creator, vrith
all the fenfes of the body and
all the faculties of the foul.
Thou knoweft, O my Lord, that
I have often been much more terri-
fied at the apprehenfion of behold-
ing thy countenance incenfed a-
gainft me at the lafl terrible day,
than at the idea of all the torments
and furies of hell reprefented to
my mind; and thou knoweft how
often I have befoughtthce,as behold,
proftrate before thee, I befeech
thee now at prefent, that, of thy in-
finite mercy, thou wouldll fpare me
this greateft and moft deplorable
mifery : for what misfortune can
befal me equal to this? May every
other calamity thou art pleafed to
appoint overwhelm me, only fpare
me this, and grant that I may not
be
C 62 )
be excluded for ever from tire fight
of thy gracious countenance. Be-
hold thy heavenly Father has he-
flowed thee as a prefent upon us,
grant that I may not for ever lofe
thee, my mod invaluable treafure,
O eternal Father, I confefs that I
have hitherto been negligent and
faithlefs in preferving it, but my
evil is not without remedy, as long
as the period of my trial is not
concluded.
O ye, my brethren, my brethren,
children of the fame common Fa-
ther with rnyfelf, let us exert our-
felves to obtain his favor, fince he
has allured us, that in whatever
day we are truly contrite for our
offences, he will remember them
no more. O boundlefs mercy of.
my God, what can we dcfire more
than this ? might not we even blufh,
without
( 63 )
without fuch an aflurance, to afk
for the pardon of our fins upon
fuch terms as thefe ? Let us at leaft
accept of the proffered mercy of
our compaflionating God, and fince
he is gracioufly pleafed to court our
friendmip, let usnotrefufe it on our
part, feeing that he has fhed the
laft drop of his precious blood, and
given his life a facrifice to prove
the fincerity of his friendmip in our
regard. Think alfo, that he afks
nothing at our hands, but what it is
infinitely for our advantage to give
him. O my God, I am confounded
when I confider the infenfibility,
the blindnefs, and the ftupidity of
mankind in this particular : the lofs
of the mod trifling thing, that makes
either for our profit or our pleafure,
affects us with grief, and yet we can
lofe
( 64 )
lofe thee, the Majelty of heaven,
and together with thee our title
to the bright kingdom above, the
kingdom of immortal joys, without
forrow or concern! Who can
account for this, my God ? who can
account for it ? It is far beyond
my comprehenfion, but do thou, O
Lord, I befeech thee, do thou put
an end to this extravagant mad-
pefs.
MED I-
6 5
MEDITATION XV.
On the only confolation of the foul>
during its baniJJimcnt here on earth.
A.
LAS, O my God, alas, how
long and tirefome is this time of my
banifhment, and how much do I
fufFer through my impatience to
behold thee ! O what comfort can
the poor foul find, while pent up in
the narrow prifon of this mortal
body! Men fay that life is Ihort,
but O how long do I find it. It
is fhort indeed, compared with the
eternity of blifs which we may fe-
cure by employing it aright ; but O,
how long does it appear to the
foul that impatiently defires to be-
K hold
( 66 }
hold her God! What remedy, my
God, canft thou apply to this my
affliction? there is no other than
what arifes from the confcioufnels
of my fufFering in compliance with
thy holy will. O happy affliction,
which art the only confolation of a
foul that loves her God, do not
fpare me, fmce at -the fame time
thou encrcafeft, thou afiuageft the
pain which I feel from the abfence
of my beloved. Lord, all my de-
fire is to pleafe thee, and I am fully
convinced that I fliall never find
content in any thing out of theej
No wonder then I mould thus im-
patiently long for thy prefence.
Neverthelefs if, by my continuance
in this life, I can in any degree pro-
mote thy divine fervice, behold me
here ready to accept, in imitation
of
( 67 )
of thy holy fervant St. Martin, of
whatever labors or fufferings thou
fhalt pleafe to ordain for me. But
alas, my Saviour, how great is the
difference between him and me!
Pie had works to mew, but I have
nothing but words, for indeed I am
fit to produce nothing elfe; but do
thou, O Lord, have regard to my
defires, and not to my merits.
Grant, that we may all attain to the
love of thee, and fince we muft live
our deftined time, let us live for
thee alone. May all other defires
and all other interefts now ceafe;
for what greater gain or what great-
er pleafure can there be than to
pleafe thee !
O thou my God, and my only de-
light, what can I do to pleafe thee '
all the fervice I can render thee is
K 2 imperfect
( 68 )
imperfect and nothing worth. To
what end then do I remain in this
miferable life? for no other, my
God, except that thy holy will may
be accomplished in me. And what
ean be more for my advantage than
this ? Wait then, my foul, wait
with patience, fince thou knoweft
neither the day nor the hour of thy
deliverance. Watch carefully, firice
every thing here on earth is paffing
quickly away. It is only thy im-
patience, that makes what is cer-
tain appear doubtful, and what is
fhort appear long. Confider that
the longer thou fighteft the battles
of the Lord, the more thou fheweft
thy love to him, and the more com-
pleatly thou (halt enjoy his perfec-
tions in blifs that mall never end.
V EDI-
t 69 )
MEDITATION XVL
That God alone is capable of folacing
thofe fouh> -which he has wounded
with the dart of his heavenly
love.
o
I
My Lord and my God, it is a
great confolation to a foul that fuf-
fers, in her abfence from thee, to
know that thpu art prefent every
\vhere. But of what iervice is this
truth to her, when the ardor of her
love to thee, O my God, encreafes,
and the violence of her pain re-
doubles! for then her underftand-
ing grows obfcure, and her reafon
confufed, fo that me becomes quite
infenfible of this important maxim ;
the
( 7 )
the only thoughts that then pofTefs
her, are, that fhe is unfortunately
feparated from thce, and that fhe
can no where difcover 'a remedy
for her calamity. For the heart,
that is deeply wounded with divine
love, feeks for no counfel or com-
fort but from him that has inflamed
it, knowing that it is from him
alone it can receive the afTuage-
ment of its pain. When thou
pleafeft, O my Saviour, thou doft
prefently heal the wound thou hafl
made, but tiir then it in vain to
look for any remedy or comfort,
but in the knowledge of our fuffer-
ings anfwering fo good an end.
O Thou, true lover of our fouls,
with what goodnefs, with what
fweetnefs, with what delight, with
what heavenly careffes, with what
demonftrations
demonftrations of an infinite love
doft thou cure our wounds, by means
of the fame love that has caufed
them! O my God, thou only Com-
forter of my pains, how foolifh is it
in me to imagine, that human re-
medies can footh a breaft that is on
fire with the love of thee ! Who
ean penetrate to the depth of this
wound of love ? who can tell from
whence it comes, or how at once a
pain fo fevere and yet fo delicious,
can be removed ? how can it be ex-
pelled that a wound, infli&ed by
the Almighty, mould be clofed by
the contemptible efforts of human
art?
It is with reafon the Spoufc, in
the Canticles, fays, My Beloved [to
me, and J to my Beloved, Cant. ii. 16.
She fays firft, My Beloved to me, be-
caufe
caufe it is not pofllble, thatfo divine
a thing, as this happy union is,
fhould take its beginning from fo
bafe an origin as my affections are.
But why, O thou fpoufe of my foul,
if my affections be fo bafe, why do
they not reft in creatures ? why do
they conftantly mount up to the
Creator? how comes it alfo to be
faid, I to my beloved, no lefs than My
beloved to me? It is thou indeed,
my true lover, that doft begin this
fweet conteft of love, which is firft
carried on by a total abfence of all
the powers of my foul, whilft they
impatient feek after thee : thus rc-
fembling the fpoufe in the Canti-
cles, by running, as it were, through
the ftreets and public places, and
conjuring the daughters of Jerufa-
lem to indicate to them where they
can
{ 76 J
can find their God. But this con-
tcfl of love being once begun,
againft whom do thefe powers of
my foul ftrive, but againft him who
has taken poffeflion of that fortrefs
of the foul which they before held,
and, who in fubduing them, has only
in view, that they fhould be forced
to acknowledge their own mifery
and infufficiency when deprived of
him ; and thus, by taking from him
the graces they ftand in need of,
they fhould, in fome fort, fubdue
again their Conqueror ? for, by
thus renouncing all confidence in
their own ftrength, they derive an
effectual ftrength from him, and
in confefling themfelves conquered
they become truly conquerors. O
my foul, what an admirable conflict
of this nature haft thou fuftained !
L and
f U )
and how ftri&ly has the faying of
the fpoufe in the Canticles, My be-
loved to me, and I to vny beloved, been
verified in thy regard f Who will
now attempt to extinguish thefe
united flames, which in fa& are no
longer two fires but one.
MEDI-
75
MEDITATION XVIL
That we art ignorant of what rue
ought to beg of God as conducive to
our happinefs. The ardent deftrt
of the foul to enjoy the liberty of
the children of God, which conjijls
in an exemption from the pojfibility
of offending him.
o
My God, Thou infinite and
unbounded Wifdom, beyond what-
ever the. underftanding of men or
angels can poflibly conceive! O
Love, that doft love me beyond
whatever affection I am capable of
bearing to myfelf or even of com-
prehending! Why mould I wifh
L 2 for
for any thing except what thou
art pleafed to appoint ? Why fhould
I weary myfelf with begging for the
accomplifhment of my defires, fince
thou alone knoweft whither thefe
ideas and wifhes of mine^ would
conduclme; whereas I, being igno-
rant of this, might perhaps find my
ruin where I expe&ed to meet with
a blefling. If, for example, I a(k
thee to'deliver me from any afflic-
tion, thou haft fent me for the pur-
pofe of teaching me felf-denial,
how fatal, evidently, is the nature
of fuch a requeft ? if, on the other
hand, I petition for the continuance
of fuch affliction, perhaps I afk for
more than my flock of patience,
which thou knoweft how (lender it
is, is able to fupport; and fhould I
a&ually fupport it, poflibly I might
begin
( 77 )
begin to think that I had done great
matters, whereas, in that cafe, it
would be thou that didft perform
the whole. If I afk to fuffer fome-
thing for thy fake, perhaps I beg it
may not be in fuch cafes, where I
am expofed to lofe that reputation
which I vainly imagine to be ne-
ceffary for enabling me to promote
thy fervice, flattering myfelf at the
fame time, that it is thy hcmor, p and
not my own, I am feeking, whereas,
after all, perhaps the very means,
which I fear might deprive me of
the confidence of my fellow crea-
tures, may fecure it to me, and ena-
ble me to ferve thee in a more ef-
fectual manner than before, which
is the only end I wifh to have in
view in all things.
I might
( 78 )
I might fay much more to the
fame effeft; but thou, O Lord,
knoweft what I mean better than I
do myfelf. Why then, O LonJ,
do I employ words at all on this
oecafion ? The reafon is, that when
the affti&ion of fpirit mall return
upon me, and when darkoefs mall
again overfpread my foul, I may
find myfelf, as it were, again in this
my hand-writing. For oftentimes, O
my God, I feel myfelf fo miferable,
fo weak, and fo cowardly, that I
feem to look for myfelf in vain,
whom but a little before I feemed
to feel endowed with ftrength and
grace enough to encounter all the
violence and tempefls of the world.
Grant, O my God, that I may no
more truft in my own imagination^
but may thy divine providence dif-
pofc
( 79 )
pofe of me as it pleafes ; this I beg,
fince all my happinefs confifts in the
accomplifhment of thy bleffeS will ;
whereas if thou wert to grant me
all that I myfelf may wifh for, I
clearly fee that I mould bring about
my own ruin.
O how fhort-fighted is the wif-
dom, and how uncertain the pru-
dence of mankind ! do thou, O my
God, by thy heavenly wifdom, pro-
vide me with the neceflary means
for ferving thee according to thy
own will, and not according to
mine: Do not infli6t the fevere pu~
fiifhment upon me, of granting me
my requefts, when they are not con-
formable to the defigns of thy love,
which I wifh ever to be the very
principle of my life. Let' me die
to myfelf j and let one who is great-
er
er than I, who loves me better thaa
I love myfelf, for ever live in me,
that I fnay learn how to ferve him.
Let him live in me, and thus give me
life; let him reign in me, that thus
I may become his fervant; for this
is the only liberty I crave. Alas,
how can that foul be truly free that
is not in fubjeclion to the Moil
High! and what more wretched
flavery can fhe be reduced to,
than to lofe the protection of her
Creator! Happy thofe who find
themfelves fo ftrongly bound to
thee by the ties of thy love, that it
is not in their power to difengage
themfelves from thee. Love isjlrong
as death, and hard as hell. Cant. viii.
6. O that we were reduced by it
to a ftate of death, and plunged in-
to this furnace of love without any
hopes
hopes of efcaping from it, or rather
without any fears of being baniihed
from it ! But, alas, O my God; as
long as this mortal life endures, we
are flill in danger for our eternal
lot.
O Life, thou enemy of my hap-
pinefs, why is it not lawful to put an
end to thee ! I endure thee, becaufe
God is pleafed to prolong thee, I
cherifh thee, becaufe thou belonged
to him. But do not betray me, nor
be ungrateful for the care I take
of thee. Yet notwithflanding this,
O my God, how am I forced to cry
out with the Prophet, Wo is me y that
my bani/Jiment is prolonged! Pf. cxix.
It is true, all time is fhort when
confidered as the price of eternity,
neverthelefs one {ingle day, one
fingle hour appears long to the
foul that lives in a dreadful uncer-
tainty leaft (lie mould offend thee.
M O thou
O thou free will, how art thou the
flave of thyfelf, unlefs thou art
ftrongly fixed to thy Creator by the
motives of fear and love f O when,
fhall that happy day come, when
fwallowed up in the abyfs of the
Supreme Truth, thou ihalt find
thyfelf no longer to poffefs the
power of finning, nor wifh to pofTefs
it, fince then thou fhall feel thyfelf
free from all mifery, and happily
united with andabforpt in thy God!
God is infinitely happy, becaufe he
knows himfelf, loves himfelf, and
enjoys himfelf without thepoflibility
of doing otherwife; for could he
forget his own attributes, or ceafe
to love them, this would not be a
perfection but a defect in him: and
thou, O my foul, Ihalt then enjoy-
true repofe and happineTs, when
thou malt be perfectly united with
this fovereign Good, and fhalt know
what
what he knows, love what he loves,
and enjoy what he enjoys. Then
fli alt thou no more be fubjeft to
change, but thy will fhall be im-
moveably fixed in good, becaufe
the grace of God fhall at fo power-
fully in thee, and render thee fo
perfectly a partaker of his divine
nature, 2 Pet. i. 4. that thou malt
no longer have it in thy power, or
wifli to have it in thy power, to for-
get this Supreme Good, or to ceafe
to enjoy him in tranfports of love.
BlefFed are they whofe names
are written in the book of immor-
tal life But if thou, my foul, art of
that happy number, why art thou fad,
d why daft thou trouble me ? Pf.
xli. 6. Hope in the Lord, becaufe I
II yet confefs to him, my fins, and
his infinite mercies, and of both
together I will make a fong of praife
mingled with inccflknt fighs after
thee,
thce, my Saviour and my God. ibid.
It may be a day will come, when,
in the regions above, my glory fhall
Jing to him, and my confcience be
no more troubled ; Pf. xxix. 13. It
is then that fighs and tears fhall lj
no more. In the mean time, in hope
and fikncc jliall my Jlrength be ; If.
xxx. 15. I choofe rather to live and
die in the hope of this happy eter-
nity,than to pofTefs all created beings,
and all worldly advantages, which
mud fo foon have an end. Forfake
me not, O God, for my trufl is in
thce : O let me not be confounded
foi ever. O grant that I may al-
ways faithfully ierve thee, and in
every thing elfe do with me what
ihou wilt.
CONTENTS.
