Skip to main content

Full text of "College Times 1986"

See other formats


The College Times 

Jk ' 1986 





'V- & 




The College Times. The Upper Canada College Yearbook 
featuring the year in Sports, a Humour section, an Arts and Literary 
section, and a section for the Leaving Class. This is how most 
students at UCC see "The Book". To this year's College Times Staff, 
the book meant one hell of a lot of work! The following is the inside 
story of The College Times 1986. 

First Term: You walk into the College Times Office and you have 
no idea what to do. So you call a meeting. The editors don't know 
what to do. Big Trouble. Mr. Kuhn tells you to make a blueprint for 
the book; what each page will have on it. It is November. Iain still 
hasn't completed the first term sports assignments. Jim, where are 
all the photos? "There was a U16 Volleyball team?" Mark, Help! 
December; most of the articles have been submitted. Only three 
members of the leaving class handed their material in on time. What 
December 2nd deadline? It is Christmas and you are relieved to 
finally begin first term layouts. 

Second Term: You clean up some first term odds and ends, and 
hand your first set of completed layouts to the printer. "I'm glad I 
don't have your photographers." Rich, what about the humour 
section? Murray says ten pages are sold. Something is going well! 
You explain to Jim that it might be a good idea to get the 
photography more organized. Second Term sports assignments 
are done, and the articles seem to be on time. Ponton Prize. Good 
job on that poster Aug. March Break. Second Term sports are done 
within a reasonable amount of time. You're getting good at this! 
Four members of the leaving class have handed in their material. 
Your faculty adviser advises "Close the books, Alan. We have to set 
an example." 

Third Term: Rich, why don't you and Tim start doing some 
layout. Rob, by any chance were you planning on getting the 
directory in this year? I'll talk to Slemo myself. The advertising is 
sold? John, we need a cover. Graham and Yoy, Start the leaving 
class section! Damn the torpedos! Graham, is the Ponton Prize 
judged yet? You think things are coming together. Everything is 
nearing completion at the same time. The printer calls you. "There's 
no way the book is coming out on time this year." Panic! Everything 
in by Monday. Yes, you mean everything. Take a deep breath. You 
get eighty pages to the printer in the space of a week. Wind down. 
Check the proofs. Those heavy cardboard boxes arrive. You sign 
the delivery receipt. 1300 College Times 1986. There actually is a 

As always, there are a few people who worked far beyond what 
was expected, and they deserve recognition. Iain MacKinnon gave 
me valuable advice and help all year, and helped with all sections of 
the book. Graham Sanders was both a literary and leaving class 
editor, and did great work in both areas. 

Jim Smith took on a huge job as Photography editor. He put in 
countless hours both in the darkroom, taking pictures, and on 
organization. His expertise was also invaluable, as he performed 
more than a few minor miracles. Also, Trevor Welch and John 
Thompson spent an immense amount of time in the darkroom 
making prints. They managed to maintain their good humour 
throughout some of the more tense moments, and this was greatly 

My year with the College Times was one I will never forget. I know 
not everyone will be happy with what we have done, but if everyone 
enjoys reading the book and flipping through it in future years, we 
will have achieved our goal. 

The College Times 

June 1986 

The CT Staff 

Vol. 128 

Table of Contents 

Editor-in-Chief: Alan Baldachin 

Assistant Editor: Iain MacKinnon 

Photograph]; Editors: Jim Smith, Mark Hyland 

Sports Editor: Iain MacKinnon 

Leaving Class Editors: Greg Sigel, Graham Sanders 

Literary Editors: Graham Sanders, Tom Augustinas 

Humour Editors: Richard Press, Tim Hylton 

Business Editors: Murray McCutcheon, Charles Field-Marsham 

Features Editor: Ian Johnson 

Color Section Editors: John Viljoen, Jim Smith 

Directory Editor: Rob Gambhir 

Artwork: John Viljoen, Josh Druckman, Craig Duffield 

General Photography: Jim Smith, John Thompson, Trevor 

Welsh, John Heppolerte, Chris Oster, Blair Allen, Dave Rose, 

Grant Gush, Steve Plummer. Also, thanks to the girls at 

Branksome College for their contributions. 

General Staff: Scott Sullivan, Rob Steiner, Malcom MacLaren, 

Colin Fumess, Reggie Jackson, Jesse Barfield, Johnnie LeMaster. 

Prep Section: Mr. Jon Pierce 

Faculty Adviser: Mr. Wayne Tompkins 

Printed by: Mr. Wolf Kuhn 

Cover by: John Viljoen 

The staff wishes to thank Mr. Tompkins for his guidance, and 
Mr. Kuhn for his advice and hard work on our behalf. 


4 The Prep Section 

48 The Upper School 

51 The Fall Term 

69 The Winter Term 

83 The Spring Term 

97 Arts and Letters 

121 The Humour Section 

131 After Classes 

141 The Leaving Class 

187 Advertising 

205 The Directory 



Sorting books into piles labelled "Keep," "Sell" and "Throw 
Out" is a tedious task brightened occasionally either by finding a 
prize specimen you thought you had lost, or by accidentally 
running across a piece of prose or poetry that once had gripped 
you. During the process, I was surprised to discover I had eleven 
assorted books of verse; after a brief study of these, I put them all 
in the "Keep" box, because they all contained some amusing or 
useful or moving ideas that seemed to me to be written in poetry 
more memorably than they could possibly be in prose. There 
were more of these poems that 1 can count, but one that caught 
my eye was "If — ", by Rudyard Kipling. 

Born in India in 1865, Kipling was both poet and novelist — 
you may have read Kim or Captains Courageous, The Jungle 
Book or Just So Stories or Puck of Pook's Hill. He was an 
enthusiastic, vigorous writer who won the Nobel Prize for 
Literature in 1 907, and was a leading literary imperialist (but not 
an unqualified one) during the Golden Age of the British 
Empire. He was at his best in the art of the short story — 
character, dialogue, atmosphere were all rendered remarkably 
well. But some of his poems have also endured, one of the best 
known being "Recessional," a stern warning against the 
complacency of English imperialism. 

"If — ", written in 1910, is (or was) also very well known; a 
satirical, highly successful movie based (very loosely) on the 
poem was made by Lindsay Anderson several years ago. "If — " 
is written as though a man of experience were talking to a boy, 
perhaps his son. In order to become a Man, the boy should try to 
follow several courses of action in life. Some of these, in 
paraphrase, are the following: 

Don't panic, even if everyone around you does so, and 

blames you. 

Have faith in yourself, even if others doubt you, but 

forgive their doubts. 

Be patient. 

Tell the truth, whether others lie about you or not. 

Don't hate; don't preen; don't brag. 

Dream and think, but don't let dreams and thoughts 

rule your life. 

Treat Triumph and Disaster the same: they are both 


Force yourself to carry on even if you think you can't. 

Treat everyone — kings and crowds — the same. 

Don't let either friends or enemies hurt you. 

Work hard. 
There is more advice contained in the poem than the points 
listed above, but it is difficult to translate into prose. This is how 
Kipling expressed some of it: 

//you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken 

Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools, 

Or watch the things you gave your life to broken 

And stoop and build 'em up with worn-out tools. 
And again: 

// you can make a heap of all your winnings 

And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss, 

And lose, and start again at your beginnings 

And never breathe a word about your loss. 
I don't think Kipling was suggesting that success comes from 
gambling, but you get the idea: live a little dangerously and. if 
you lose, start again — quietly. 

It seems to me that most of the philosophy contained in this 
poem is wisdom, no matter to what age or sex or race it is 
addressed. Coolness, belief in self, patience, love, willpower, for- 
giveness, hard work — these are values we can all understand 
and support. Read the whole poem some time. It is worth 

Meanwhile, have a good summer — and a good year — and a 

good life. 


by Joe Diebes 

It was a bleak and dismal day and the sky was overcast as our soccer team 
ran onto the field. We were playing Appleby at UCC, and as I gazed at their 
towering players I recalled that we had never won against them. The outcome 
of the game depended on the last fifteen seconds when the score was tied. 

A loud crash of thunder sounded and the rain pelted down heavier than 
ever. Their goalie kicked the ball way over my head. I didn't think we had a 
chance. A resounding thud between boot and ball could be heard as our left 
fullback booted the ball in front of me. As I dribbled downfield, I knew that I 
had to make this work, but there wasn't a person with me as I approached 
their net. Perspiration was rolling down my brow; my legs and arms felt weak; 
the only thing keeping me on my feet was my adrenaline. I solidly lifted the 
ball with all that was left of my strength. Their goalie, now drenched, dived in 
desperation, then fell clumsily to the ground as the ball pierced the top right 
corner of the net. A joyous victory for Upper Canada College! 

Photos: Doug Brown, Jason Cipolla 


\l iff 

S, . y^zM lW ; ■ 



by Paul Chan 

As they scuttled through the door and 
gathered by the diving board for the first swim 
practice, the boys' feet made a soft patter on the 
dry tiles. Mr. Cook gave us quick, quiet instruc- 
tions: as a warm-up, we were to swim the 
perimeter of the pool. He would demonstrate. 

He swam the four sides of the pool in four dif- 
ferent strokes. The water streamed around him 
as he cut through it, trying for style, not speed. 
Bubbles foamed along the length of his arms as 
they reached out, and his legs kicked vigourously. 
causing white explosions at the surface. Sud- 
denly his tense muscles relaxed, and he crawled 
out of the pool, his feet smacking wetly on 
the tiles. 

The sample warm-up was over, and the season 
had begun. Good luck to all Prep swimmers, 
and thanks to coach Cook! 

Art: Tim McClew 
Photos: Walter Blunt 





by Mike Hume 

It was raining. As I opened the bus door, an air of mustiness 
engulfed me, reminding me of past school trips. As I chose my seat, 
I noticed that an abundance of Halloween candy was circulating 
about the bus and I was reminded of my lunch. Before the bus had 
left, I had demolished it. This was the beginning of the second 
annual LR Ottawa Trip. 

The Holiday Inn in downtown Ottawa was the LR's home base 
as they set out on daily treks into the area, ripping apart the city for 
information. The hotel was one of the tallest buildings in Ottawa, 
being 23 floors high, but the rooms were clean and spacious (until 
we got into them). 

Besides frequent visits to museums such as the Museum of 
Science and Technology and the War Museum, we were also 
treated with guided tours of the area. Tours of Parliament and 
then question periods were also on the agenda. To top it off, inter- 
views with David Crombie, John Bosley and Sheila Copps fulfilled 
our thirst for knowledge as all questions were asked and answered 
well. We might have got the Prime Minister himself, but he was 
being presented with a Juno Award. 

Photos: Doug Brown. Bernard Lecerf 



by Tobin Davis 

The blue-and-white shirted players thrust open the dressing room door and spill 
onto the sparkling ice. like a volcano erupting. Then the towering black and yellow 
visitors march out of their dressing room, chartering and ready to play. 

The scarred puck is dropped and the action commences. The lively, enthusiastic 
crowd cheers supportively as the energetic players hustle and bash boisterously 
against each other. The shrill sound of the eagle-eyed referee's whistle and the harsh 
impact of bodies persist throughout an exciting, scoreless game. 

With 7 seconds remaining, the game whistle echoes and there is an important face- 
off in the visitor's end. The home team's coach boldly decides to yank his goalie and 
put on an extra attacker, in pursuit of the winning goal. Both teams gaze nervously 
from the benches, urging their team on to victory. The puck is dropped and both 
teams swipe at it. The seconds tick away as the scrimmage continues; finally, a blue- 
and-white jersey shovels the puck into the net over the sprawling goalie. The red light 
flashes triumphantly, and the crowd roars its approval. 




* * J 

II! « ' ( * * 

4hv 1 1| 

5 1 1 


by Mike Hume 

As we drove to the house of our billet, I absorbed the picture- 
perfect characteristics of the Finlandia landscape. The country 
road we were driving on was twisting and turning and offering a 
new sight to be seen around every corner. Cross-country skiers 
slid alongside the road and little children in thick snowsuits 
tobogganed on the low, rolling hills in the distance. Now farther 
out into the country, fresh snow covered the flat wheat fields; 
large pine trees clumped here and there, adding color to this 
crisp and serene atmosphere. Ahead, we saw an old house, a 
small waft of smoke spinning out of its red brick chimney. This 
was the kind of house where hospitality could always be 
expected. We arrived at the house and stepped out of the car and 
into the brisk noonday air. The children welcomed us into their 
home and that is where we stayed for almost a week. 

From December 27 to January 12 of this year, the Prep first 
hockey team undertook a hockey tour of Finland, Sweden and 
the U.S.S.R. Everyone had fun on the trip and it was an excellent 
experience for all involved. 


\\' • 'f" f ' «■* 









by Chad Tatum 

The empty patient trees 
Bound by snow and ice 
Waiting to be wakened. 

. ,f M 



by Chad Tatum 

The empty patient trees 
Bound by snow and ice. 
Waiting to be wakened. 

il fl 


Photos: Tam Matthews 


-if ¥ . 


by Christopher Healy 

Gently, a May breeze 

Steers a butterfly 

Among the swaying flowers. 



S T « A 

*< ' ■ » 

3 ;,'/; 

Photos: Rob Station 



by Winston Yung 

The black-and-white shirted official sounds his whistle, 
piercing the expectant hum of the pre-game crowd. The 
players take their positions; the referee tosses the ball into 
the air. As the ball reaches its height, the two centers tense, 
flex, and leap toward the ball, arms outstretched for the 
best tipping position. At its highest point, the ball is batted 
into the eager hands of a blue-and-white uniformed boy; 
unhestitatingly, he breaks quickly down the court, stops at 
the top of the key, fakes one defender, then another. Tim- 
ing his jump accurately, he lofts the ball softly, deliberately 
keeping his eyes on the orange rim. Soaring through the 
air, the ball drops gently through the net. The spectators 
applaud with excitement... 

Photos: Richard Scroop 
Art: Tim McClew 


by Jason Aitken 

The server hits the ball soft and high — front wall, side 
wall, and almost to the back wall. With difficulty, the 
receiver scrapes it back to the front wall. On it with time to 
spare, his opponent drops it into the sidewall nick: a dead 
winner! The frustrated look of the other player reveals the 
situation: 8-7 and game point. The serve takes place and 
the ball lofts toward the front wall. The receiver swings 
mightily, but the effort is in vain; the ball glances off the rim 
with a light, metallic sounds. 9-7, game ! The match ended, 
the players shake hands and congratulate each other. 
"That's good squash, boys; well played," compliments Mr. 
Pearce as the players leave the court. 


Photos: Grant Bunker, Jason Cipolla 
Art: Tim McClew 


by Robert Scott 

I strut back to the baseline, trying not 
very successfully to look casual and relax- 
ed. I tell myself that this is the last point of 
the finals of the ISAA tournament. When I 
reach the baseline the umpire yells "Match 
point". I relax a little bit; it always feels good 
to be about to win something. I tell myself 
to concentrate, though; I prepare myself for 
anything. I feel blood and energy surging 
through my body as it never has before. I 
gently rub my tongue across my chapped 
lips; I stand poised on the balls of my feet. 
Every muscle in my body is tensed, utterly 
and completely prepared for the oncoming 
ball. All my concentration and attention are 
directed toward the fluorescent globe. I 
quickly rub the results of sheer determina- 
tion off my forehead and tip my hat so the 
sun is out of my eyes. My opponent gently 
tosses the ball in the air and takes a strong 
swing. He smashes the ball with his last bit 
of determination. The ball zooms my way. I 
leap to return the oncoming ball. I smash 
the ball with all my might; down the line it 
goes, and bounces on the baseline. He mis- 
ses the shot completely. I jump with joy and 
scream loudly. What a win! 


Photos: Grant Bunker Art: Tim McClew 



by Jason Aitken 

As the cricket ball floats through the air, the tense batter raises 
his bat and swings towards the middle stump. At the last moment, 
the batter steps his front foot forward and blocks the pitched-up 
bowl. The next bowl is off stumps and cracks off the bat towards a 
bare-handed fielder. The fielder cushions his hands as he catches 
the ball. Hawzeee, cry all the people in the field as they jump up in 
joy and relief. The batsman walks off the field, having been caught 
out, however satisfied with the tidy sum of runs he scored. 

This scene is one of the many you might witness in either a 
cricket match or just a friendly scrimmage. If you enjoy a game 
which requires you to field and throw with skill and accuracy, I 
would definitely recommend that you learn how to play cricket. I 
say this not only because I enjoy the game, but because cricket is a 
sport which you will probably not get another chance at playing in 
later life. This is mainly because cricket is a team sport which is not 
usually played in other places in North America. 

Photo: Mike Buda 

Art: Tim McClew 


fc g 


by Christopher Healy 

The cool spring breeze rolled across the games field, gently mov- 
ing the awakening trees. The sounds of laughter and cries of glee 
echoed from corner to comer where softball games relieved boys 
from their studies for one short hour of the long school day. 

In one corner, the batter stood poised, crouched over slightly, his 
feet planted like twisted roots shoulder-width apart, waiting for the 
next pitch. His damp and sweaty hands gripped the dented 
aluminum bat held just above his rounded shoulders. His face had a 
fierce look of determination yet still allowed signs of tense feeling. In 
front of him stood the opposing pitcher, looking down upon him 
with glaring eyes that seemed to see right through the batter, he 
paused momentarily, then stepped towards the batter and 
gracefully swung his arm downward ready to release the ball just as 
his powerful arm would begin its ascent back upwards. 

The ball lofted through the air following a familiar trajectory 
toward the batter. The batter looked at the ball intently, watching, 
waiting, until he would lunge out and strike. As the ball approached 
him, he felt his right foot unroot and step forward, his arms came 
around farther and farther, then he connected. 

A hollow tock emitted from the bat, echoing across the field. The 
ball sailed up into the pale blue sky, soaring out above the field. 
There was a resounding thud as the batter dropped the bat and 
began to pump his legs towards first base, the look of determination 
still on his tense face. The scuffed ball had now begun its descent 
back to the battered earth. A cry of despair came from the out- 
fielders as they scrambled to get to the ball in time. The batter had 
almost made it to first, gaining speed with each powerful stroke of 
his legs. The ball was now meters away from impact, and a smile 
began to spread over the batter's face. 

Suddenly, in a valiant effort to catch the oncoming ball, an out- 
fielder outstretched himself and dove underneath the ball. The 
smack of leather indicated a shoestring catch and the end to 
another exciting game of softball. 

Photos: Doug Brown 



by James Mesbur 

Ah, at last, play day had arrived! I knew my lines and my voice 
felt fine, but this didn't matter: I was still petrified with fear. I was 
playing the part of the crusty old pirate, Long John Silver. As the 
curtain rose, all my previous fears vanished, and the play went 
along smoothly until Polly the parrot forgot her line. Silence fell 
upon the stage, and laughter rose up from the audience. Then 

there was a loud click, and everybody shut up. "Polly thinks so, 
Polly thinks so!" the parrot finally managed. Oy vay! What a 
dumb parrot! 

The play went on and ended without further ado. As the curtain 
fell, the cast all started to sing, and the final line of the play was 
"Yo, ho, ho and a bottle of rum! 


rt TimMcCleu> 
SaT5 Vernon ^ 

by Mike Hume 

Mr. Meikle raised his arms. "Tap! Tap!" said the 

"1, 2, 3, 4!" 

The players breathed together as if one and started with 
a mighty clash of cymbals and loud instruments. The 
room was glistening with the reflections of the fluorescent 
lights on the polished brass. The bass drum player 
boomed out the rhythm in this jazzy and fast-paced piece. 
Now came the trumpet section's solo. They blew out an 
extraordinary series of quick, high fanfares, faces straining 
and turning red and playing in perfect harmony. Their 
solo finished and they removed the silver mouthpieces 
from their mouths to reveal white rings in the centre of 
their otherwise ruby red lips. After a short introdruction, 
the drummer started his recital. Arms flailing, tongue 
wagging, drum heads near to breaking, he pounded out a 
rousing solo, using every drum in the perfect sequence 
and timing. Mr. Meikle, who likes a good, strong 
drummer, started to shake his head about in excitement. 
Soon, sweat started flying off the drummer's face as he 
came near the end of his part. The ever-present 
trombones struck up the lead now, using the gliss to the 
full extent. The piece was near its end. Then, for the last 
two bars, with Mr. Meikle's arms raised in encouragement, 
the sound increased in volume. Five, four, three, two, one\ 
BoomW The piece ended with a marvelous crash of every 
instrument in the band. The tuba held the note. 

"We"U do it again because of this idiotl 1, 2, 3, 4!" 


Photos: Grant Bunker, Bruce Litteljohn 

Tim McClew 




by Barry P* icc 

-point-* a. chore head a , rM „ b fad to ^ 

stupidly on the floo r.lhe ron the prisoner schee ^ 

steel met his thicK tQ hfi cellmate e 

again and passed t^T^ e . They passed it to an 

solemnly.Theguncbckedonc ^ agmn . He «» 

U time, and ^^^.TheoH^ ^«^^ g 
slightly unsteady hand to n and let of f a sno , 

10 n. The captive «*£«££, spattered the c**^*^ 

stingmgsalt. Hie weaponless S ua ' a ' . fi ton enow. 

,Mma ' i0n The^t gSs were on either ***££* heaved a 

S3 each other allies. 

"We gotta escape. 

" WeiUS \ da H dtiredly "Yeah, right! My names Mitch. A 
Th e one laughed tired y . 
and mortars, And you com panlon. We d hetter 

"Don. U seems well be t soon 

01 . __j. Howasonac 

them moved out »w , . , ^ & ^ q{ 


se« and -s lost. peer. 9 ^ 

crest- S(and i„. aro und, what' You 

jssss— — ; ;::; akeup , 

eyes. , . t? Here's a sword. n<>» ■ ,^i no keddown 

V "Wake up then, what? He ^^ d , who ^ 

The knight shoved a sword ^ ^ and charged^ 
a tthegleamingsteel,then ^ ^ h thicke* 9* 

The knight spurred Ltoho ^^ ^ d ft a pUtu tQ 

Mitch struck down ^U As he spun ^.^^he was 

face an attacker, « bac kswing, he clove and 


face from its base u hrough , he mua un 

theringingof swordonsw- ^ £»* £* no 

dumped hoove* AtoOT ^^ w „ y abour an . ^ 

- a"- » brXTiKSS bo, - 

reflective black wttn Death mca l. The 

you want i* ne 

{in 9 er - rrhina" he said in a deep croak. 

"You are searching, 

-For what? are on ly a spirit Trave 1 9 

"**» b0dV ' t Kur'ead body, and depart to 

"T US ha y d° U no »" 5 We, and your he ^ pother won 
You have had no joy ^ ^ yQur mortal yea 


the half you have 1 

° u " - *? - ^"SSSSSSE 2 

Eer half, the whole soul will be rem „ 

Leed to Heaven h Good-bve n h »^ ppeared . Mi tch 9 ot up 

The figure swept his arm in an a 
jn d set off through the jungle. 

d sei <jn uuu "= * * * , 

u , -a tour quide yammered 

-Egypt is the place of blah. blah. blah . A ^^ a 

in his^ry, nasal American voice. He wa ^s q{ ^ 

"J Z chamber ca<ved from red ock. The* ^ 

rattan, chips of stone and some tools, s ^ ^ her whming 
and then a squalid lady would wadal The gro 
child and finger it with her P ud »^ c J suits . and their rotund 

consisted of about twenty men m yacht c had & ^ ^ 

dog w,th a bow in its hair and a pug dimensiona l curtain, 

parent's sleeve, and m °^ p X redr oom with two large pylons 
wh ichonlyMitchsaw,wasatall.P^a ^ ^ out grea t 

which supported a ^ n ^S n q a lange green Pharaoh. The floors 
spreadof hieroglyphics, depictingalargg ^ and 

were marble, and the ^ d ^ were no walls , but a 
alabaster sculptures and ^™ ng about their Pharaomc 
vacuous universe full of Phara ° h * 9 , ^ M itch, and he watched 


towering over him. bellowed dee ply. 

"Are you god, or monai. 

-I am mortal." „ ciT u "You are puny! We do not need 

The god sneered with animosity. YouaP ^ Qut q{ 

yoU !\)sins and his son Hon* > ^^ not believe in us any 
his rage and looked down at his teet. 

more!" he accused in despair. ^ ^ and ads? 

Mitch was stunned. 1, l ■ • 
he suggested. 

•That will not help. 

'Til believe." . his knee s on two planets. 

-Would you?" The Pharaoh sank 
-What would you like? 

-Huh?" Mitch said, infused mind t read 

-What do you want in return for your hep 

minds. Off to Babylon' 

i ,i+V, *ANU* printed in raw 
dlrt road towards an ^toli^r 
diamonds onto a cdmson-blott^ b ^ they s ^ 

emerged from the temple and ^ew ^.^ his back . ne 

Thev seized his arms and wrencnea him 

time to reply but ^dta'^; about the floor 

and plush mattresses. Pink fan were stte ^ 

a silk feather bed where >*ubby, P^ dressed oniy in 
e andfannedbynolessthan^w = 

scraps of bojangled clothes wh,ch^ ^ ^ mostl 

Mitch told a lew )<*». *» "%, dldn 't understand so he 
Because the chicken was Sick bur h «_ ^ (hings ^ w as 
lold stoties of *°saurs and cavern, ^ ^ ^ guards too k 
SUI e were older than Babylon, w 

hold of him again, though .n better ^^ commanded . 

-You must tell as why you a- hj*^ Qur wfee ma „ 
-before we let you go Are jo 9 

2U Death 1 assure V--" ^^, Truth. Many wander 
quickly. The tests of Courage. *™^ and Heaven . Youw ill now 

complete these tests. 

* * * 

Dea ,n was walking beside Mi.* ^^^i Au revoi," 

-You have passed ^^Jl^L still walking down a 
He waved his hand and disappeareo 

mplete mese ,«-■ , , , 

peace" . , fplt a surg e of strength as his soul 

P Mitch strode forward and f t 9^ and {ound what man 

r^^^rotfltbevoodtha, we believe to 

be a void. 


by Chris Rickerd 

II y a plusieurs sortes d'argent, 

Des dollars, des pesos et des francs. 

Les citoyens des Etats-Unis et du Canada 

Utilisent l'argent pour faire des achats. 

L'argent est depense dans des Bourses 

Qui peuvent reagir comme des taureaux ou des ours. 

Les Francais, qui aiment boire du vin 

Utilisent l'argent pour l'acheter sans fin. 

Les fermiers qui demeurent en Hongrie 

Depensent leur argent pour acheter du salami. 

Les gouvemements des Etats-Unis et de la Russie 

Jettent leur argent pour produire trop de fusils. 

Les habitants et les touristes a Cuba 

Achetent beaucoup de cigares produits la-bas. 

Bien que tout le mond ait besoin d'argent, 

Le vrai bonheur ne s'achete, ni ne se vend. 


by Brian Bitar 

Soigneusement glisse l'araignee. 
Elle file sa fragile oeuvre d'art. 
Cest sa maison, c'est son arme. 
La vie tissee en une toile. 

Le temps passe, 

L'araignee habite seule dans son tissu delicat 
Seulement ses victimes visitent l'araignee. 
Les feuilles colorent la terre. 

II pleut a torrents. 

Une rafale violente secoue les arbres, 

La terre est couverte d'une couche de neige. 

Maintenant l'araignee est disparue. 



by David Johnston 

Je vois tout, 

Je peux te voir 

Et je peux voir toutes les idees qui te passent par la tete. 

Je sais tout, 

Je sais tes secrets 

Et je sais toutes les choses que tu ne diras jamais, 

Les crimes caches dans les profondeurs de ta memoire. 

Et je vais te punir, 

Je vais te torturer avec tes crimes 

Jusqu'au jour ou tu mourras. 

Je suis . . . 



by Gavin Guthrie 

It is very difficult for me to think of an embarrassing moment. I 
always thought that was fortunate, but right now a few to choose 
from would be very helpful. The only one that comes to mind 
happened during the summer break when I spent two weeks at 
Camp Huronda, a diabetic camp .near Huntsville. 

Every morning we all reported to the "Insul-Inn" for a blood 
monitoring and an insulin injection. The needle sites have to be 
rotated; e.g. arm, leg, leg and arm. However, one morning it had 
a new twist, and my counsellor, who happened to be a girl, said, 
"O.K., drop your pants and drawers. It's rump today!" Well, try 
as I might to get out of this situation, she won and I had to pre- 
sent my only cheek that wasn't blushing. Can you imagine hav- 
ing to show your backside to someone you barely know? God, I 
felt rare! 


by Braden Doherty 

Sunday night I was in the heart of a book called Vancouver 
Nightmare. I was in bed reading at eight-thirty when my mother 
came up to tuck me in. When she pulled the covers up over me, 
she did not realize that I had concealed a flashlight under the 
pillow. It was ten-thirty before I finally turned out my light. 

The next day I was exhausted. At breakfast I spilled my milk 
and put my elbow in the butter. I looked at my homework book 
and saw that we had double math and double science. Things 
were not looking too good. I went to the money box for bus tic- 
kets and all we had were coins. But it was outside that the bad 
luck began. 

My friend and I just missed one bus, and had to wait fifteen 
minutes for the next. I entered the bus by its big high steps only to 
be met by a snarky, growling bus driver. He reminded me so 
much of Spider, a character in Vancouver Nightmare, that I 
dropped my money on the floor. It began rolling at light speed 
down towards the back of the bus. I have never felt so many 
pairs of eyes staring at me — eyes of fat, tall, short, skinny. 

John Rowley 

grumpy people. My friend ignored me. The bus driver yelled, 
"Go get it!" Another supposed friend whispered. "You spaz, 
Doherty." as I wiggled my way to the middle of the bus, climbing 
over knapsacks full of books and lunches, soccer equipment, 
briefcases and lots and lots of legs. 

Finally I sported my coin, under the seat of a girl with a very 
short skirt. She was not, as my mother would say, sitting in a 
"manner appropriate for a young lady". Trying to keep my eyes 
focused on the coin, I reached down to get it. The girl looked 
down at me in disgust. 

I made my way back to the front of the bus, red-faced, weak- 
kneed and very embarrassed. A Sunday night Vancouver 
Nightmare had become a Monday morning Toronto nightmare! 



by Jonathan Appel 

Please come and play with me, 

Father butterfly, 

Even if 1 am only three. 


by Timothy Rauenbusch 


nouns and 


are quite good, 


bye-bye you Whites 

(T.H. and E.B.) 

and all 



cause I'm gonna 


the Pulitzer Prize 




is this poem good 

or not? 


by James Mesbur 

A lonely raindrop 
Descends from the sky 
Like a child's tear. 


by Alec St. Louis 

The sky is as blue as a second-place ribbon, 
The sun is as yellow as gold, 
And the lake is crystal blue. 

The sun shines down on the tree's green branches, 
And then a shadow all black and grey 
With snarling teeth that move around 
Bites into the bark. 

The air is sweet with the smell of cedar . . . 
The tree falls into the lake that was crystal blue 
And dissolves. 



^A^"^ r 


by Tim Wright 


violent pessimistic 

arguing destroying hating 

hawk hell dove heaven 

compromising creating loving 

calm optimistic 


George Balkansky 

Terence Woods 

Theodore Murata 

Jonathan Appel 

John Rowley 



by Eric Brock 

"My fellow Americans, I propose that we as a nation should 
increase our defences by building 200 new nuclear weapons." 
The President's statement had a dramatic effect on the audience. 
The constant talk of the reporters stopped, and a hush fell over 
the onlookers. They all had expected signs of peace, but no, it 
was the same old story: strength meant security. 

J.P. Smith had fooled them all. He had been a tough, two- 
fisted Governor, but had run on a platform of moderation. It was 
therefore expected that he would welcome the Russian over- 
tures for peace. Now this! The country was flabbergasted. No 
one could believe what they heard. Would there be no end to 
the theory that might is right? 

The President's elegantly trimmed moustache listened care- 
fully to every word. He was disgusted. He twitched every salt and 
pepper hair in protest. Unconsciously, the President smoothed 
him back with his thumb and forefinger. As the President's 
speech ended, it seemed as though a silence had settled over the 
entire world, for his words had been broadcast around the globe. 
Silence, yes, but anger also! 

The moustache knew he had to call a meeting that night. 

The old grandfather clock chimed the arrival of midnight. The 
President's long and slender moustache was making his way to 
the regular meeting place where he, the toothbrush, the tap 
twins, and the bandaid got together each night. Their nightly 
visits were usually taken up with casual chitchat and accounts of 
their various days. But this night was different: a global crisis was 
about to take place. 

"So, what do you think of that stupid plan!" the toothbrush 
boomed. "Why have nuclear weapons costing hundreds of 
millions of dollars when the government could use the money to 
prevent cavities? Little kids should never feel the pain of a 

"We agree wholeheartedly!" echoed the old and gold-plated 
voices of the tap twins. "We could use the money for cleaning up 
the water. We've been here in the White House for nearly a cen- 
tury, but the water has never been so bad. Imagine P.C.B.'s and 
Dioxin, Yuck!" 

"Yes, I do agree with both of you oldies but what about medi- 
cal care and research!" The young but muffled voice of the 
bandaid spoke from the medicine cabinet. "They could use the 
money for helping the sick, elderly and the handicapped." 

"Thank you ! Thank you for your ideas; but doesn't all this lead 
to one thing -peace?" The moustache spoke passionately. He 
sounded just like the President's voice. "It's peace plain and sim- 
ple. Then we would have the money for your dreams. Some- 
thing must be done!" 

There was a long silence. Then the moustache spoke quietly. 
"I have a plan," he said. And then they spent the early morning 
hours talking about strategic policies. At dawn the moustache 
settled down on the President's face for a short nap before the 
action of the day. 

When the President got up, he smoothed down his mous- 
tache, scarcely noticing that it seemed to be more bristly than 
usual, and read the latest reports from Central and South 
America. Quickly he made up his mind. He wouldn't let his 
country be pushed around. He decided to attack Nicaragua, 

Tim McClew 

Iran, Libya and Cuba, using nuclear weapons, massed troops, 
and submarines. He decided to call an emergency press con- 
ference to announce his decision. 

At 9:00 a.m. the President began to speak: 

"Due to the recent arms build up in Nicaragua, Iran, Libya and 
Cuba" ... He seemed suddenly to begin to stutter and his mouth 
seemed to be struggling with the words. "It is in my mind that we 
should stop this threat by ... by ..." A sudden twitching of his 
upper lip caused him to pause . . . "By b-banning all n-nuc!ear 
weapons world-wide, by d-dis-banding our armies and by r- 
reaching out to each other as b-brothers." His eyes were dis- 
mayed as he clapped his hands over his mouth. What was 
he saying! 

The President could not believe he had spoken, that he had 
said those words. He knew only that when he had started to talk, 
his moustache had twitched furiously. It was a strange feeling. 
He tried to explain that was not what he had meant to say at all, 
that the wrong words had somehow slipped out of his lips. 
"Gentlemen, . . ." His words were drowned out by the cheers and 
applause of the reporters. Flashbulbs popped. People ran for the 
telephones. A joyous confusion reigned. 

"Does this mean you will be calling the Soviet Leader?" some- 
one shouted. 

The President's lip twitched again. The President seemed to 
be struggling to get the right words out. "Well yes, yes, of course," 
the President blurted out. 

The next thing he knew the Russian Leader was on the line. 
Peace had won. It was over. The moustache curled up at the cor- 
ners. In spite of himself, the President smiled. 



(in the manner of Robert Service) 
by Bill Lewis 

There are strange things done in the Libyan sun 

by the men who moil for oil. 

The women in veils have strange, strange tales 

that would make your spine recoil. 

The Tripoli lights have seen queer sights 

but the queerest they ever did see 

Was on the dark night that they started to fight 

and the U.S.A. bombed Benghazi. 

Now Benghazi was by the Sidra sea 

where the water sweetly flows. 

By the calm moonlight they started to fight 

and deal their dirty blows. 

The city held the infidel 

like a witch's potent spell 

Though they'd often say in a peculiar way 

that they'd sooner train in hell. 

With his military toys, the old cowboy 

put up his wrinkled dukes 

Ready to sting, to use anything, 

even his seaborne nukes. 

But the 'ol Mad Dog had his planes in a fog, 

prepared to viciously strike 

His Koran on his right and ready to fight 

and use surface-to-air and the like. 

But Ronnie was coy, prepared to deploy 

his ship the Coral Sea 

"Onward forth, to Africa North," 

said he with fanatical glee. 

This was the place to revenge the disgrace 

that had begun in a German pub. 

The bombs would fly and people would die 

now who was the greatest thug? 

There are strange things done in the Libyan 

by the men who moil for oil. 

The women in veils have strange, strange tal 

that would make your spine recoil. 

The Tripoli lights have seen queer sights, 

but the queerest they ever did see 

Was on the dark night that they started to fight 

and the U.S.A. bombed Benghazi. 

Paul Chan 


Crawford Noble 

Tim McClew/John Rowley 

Suresh John 


Tim McClew 

Paul Chan 

David Lederman 




by Julian Poon 
The Monster 

Pertasia Persivius had metallic blue, bulging eyes ominously 
rolling about in all directions. Thin, tube-like tentacles palpitated 
in and out of hairy nostrils, resembling an organic periscope. 
They were like deadly, man-eating Venus Fly Traps, with a sticki- 
ness no creature could break free from. Morsels of flesh clung to 
these tentacles, along with several severed toes and crushed 
eyeballs, still waiting to be digested. From his retracting mouth, 
multiple tongues, resembling stigmas from a flower, were in con- 
stant motion, spitting out venom so lethal that it skinned its vic- 
tim, like a hornet's nest. His thread-like lungs hung from his 
chest, with no skin restraining it. His entire torso, comprised of a 
translucent, jelly-like, glowing substance, dische 
smell of ammonia. 

The Lair 

A sharp, ear-shattering clap of thunder and a luminous bolt of 
lightning shook the pitch black, moonless sky. A lone vulture 
could be heard screeching through the chilly, bitter, biting air. 
The entire area enveloped in this storm seemed to be in a cloak 
of eeriness. Suddenly, another burst of lightning illuminated the 
landscape. A trio of dead, crumpled, burnt bodies lay on the 
ground, with sharpened sticks piercing through their foreheads, 
like human shishkabobs. The terrain, which resembled a desert 
wasteland, had the defunct bodies of people and animals to 
serve as the cacti. The blood-stained, sandy soil felt like a mix- 
ture of sawdust, saliva, and sweat. With the exception of the 
thunder and the vulture, all was as silent as a sanctuary. 

The Treasure 

A mysterious, misty patch of fog wrapped around the 
entrance to a voluminous, subterranean cavity. Two flights of 
craggy stairwells led into a capacious, musty chamber. There, a 
visually stunning product of high technology materialized — a 
computer like not other, glistening on a brightly lit pedestal. The 
solid gold keyboard, with each symbol engraved in sapphire, 
contrasted with the sleek, glossy casing of the monitor, 
ornamented with myriads of opal. Inside, platinum microchips 
were plated with a coating of titanium. A crisp, firm "apple" was 
encrested in zircon above the keypad. Anchored beside the ter- 
minal, on a fluorite base was a silver joystick with emerald but- 
tons. Behind the bejewelled facade sat a solitary monster 
engaged in a game of Pac-People for the umpteenth time. 

John Rowley 


iy Mark Slonim 

The cellar, that eerie, forsaken place where a child's 
nightmares run rampant. Deep in the bowels of the tranquil 
home it lies, its secrets waiting to be revealed. The cellar door 
opens with an agonizing screech and the stairs seem to descend 
through the darkness into the very depths of hell. The wooden 
staircase, rotten and split, gapes open like the jaws of some 
massive creature, and the putrid odour of stateness and decay 
hangs heavy over the chamber. Spider webs entangle the lat- 
ticework of wooden beams that seem to shudder under the 
weight of the walls and ceiling. Through the dimness of the 
cellar, the red light of the furnace glares like the angry eye of a 
savage beast, growling its rage. From a maze of pipes along the 
ceiling, the steady drip of water resonates like the steady drip of 
blood on the stone floor. The large, jagged holes in the walls 
resemble open wounds. Now and then a demonic rat pokes his 
pointy face out of his rat-hole, his fiery eyes gleaming. 

Yet, through the thick, foul air pierces the narrow, triumphant 
ray of sunlight, like a mighty saber through the heart of an evil 
being, driving out the nightmarish horrors of a child, and turning 
the place back into the safety and assurance of a child's 

Paul Chan 



by David Hirsch 


South Africa, 
And Romania, too 

Saudi Arabia, 





And Afghanistan. 



And also countries. 

And all the seas. 


The Equator, 

And lines of latitude. 

You wouldn't last one day on this job with a bad attitude. 

These are all the names and places I have to know, 
I don't like it one bit but it's a living, you know. 

John Rowley 


Patrick Fejer 

Joshua Fine 

Andrew Shaw 

Greg Fenton 


by Ron-Michael Jagdeo 

This story is about a teacher I had a few years ago. He has 
bright orange hair with a matching beard, and dazzling blue eyes 
gleaming like sapphires He has a slender nose with bushy eyeb- 
rows, and his build is lean and muscular. His teeth are perfect, 
with the exception of one capped tooth. 

He doesn't get angry easily, unless he is in a bad mood. His 
dislikes are getting up early and having troubles with disobediant 
students. He is also a little shy. He is gentle and sensitive and I 
hope to have the pleasure of meeting him again. 


by Neale Gillespie 

One of my favourite teachers is a young lady who does drama 
and puppetry, at which she is very good. 

She has some special features. One of her more distinguish- 
ing features is that she's 6'2"! At all the social gatherings, she 
puts her name-tag on her skirt right at her waist so that all of the 
children can see who she is! She has a very dramatic voice and 
can tell marvelous stories, acting out all the characters with dif- 
ferent voices. 

She is very patient and puts up with a lot. She is not easily hurt. 
She gets strict when she has to, but she doesn't blow her head 
off! In doing all drama work, she makes very simple things very 
effective. It has been a lot of fun and interesting, working with 
her. It takes up some of your time, but it is worth it! 

by Stuart McDonald 

It was the first day back at school, and I was making my way up 
the stairs to my classroom. There, in front of the doorway was 
Mr. H. He was quite tall, had a nice tan, thick, thick glasses and 
curly hair. As soon as he looked at me through those thick 
glasses. I knew it was going to be a strong and hard year. 

I learned that Mr. H. had a bad temper, but could control it. If 
you were bad, he would yell so loudly the windows would crack, 
throw you out of the room, give you a detention, and then turn 
to the class and say, "Good morning, class," very calmly, after he 
had just killed a kid! One time his temper was so bad that he pick- 
ed up one of my friend's desk, threw it against the wall, and 
made a huge hole in the wall! 

Besides all those things, he was a good teacher, was nice, took 
us to a lot of great places, which I might have never gone to. and I 
was glad to be in his class! 

John Rowley 

by Jonathan Greer 

Think how nice it would be to know somebody who is plea- 
sant, fun, humorous, considerate and slightly wacky. Imagine 
having a teacher like that. This is a good description of one of my 
former teachers. 

I remember the first time I ever met him. I didn't know what 
kind of teacher he was going to be or what he was going to look 
like. He turned out to be a muscular, tall man with short brown 
hair and flashing blue eyes. He enjoyed wearing white shirts, all 
different kinds of ties, a gray suit and black shoes to school I 
always thought he was very well dressed. 

Something happened one day that showed he was consider- 
ate. It was a grub day at school. This means we were not sup- 
posed to come to school in our uniforms. We were supposed to 
wear clothes like jeans, T-shirts, running shoes and sometimes a 
hat. I forgot it was a grub day and wore my uniform to school. It 
was embarrassing coming into school and seeing all kinds of old 
clothes. To make me feel better, my teacher gave me his huge 
hockey sweater and a funny cap. I looked very weird and it 
felt perfect. 




by Brian Bitar 

From a distance, the glare of the fire against the pitch black sky 
was a sight of beauty. The immense destruction of nature was not 
yet clearly recognizable. All that could be seen was a bright, blazing 
fire, fighting forward, losing not a single battle as it tore through 
what was once a majestic forest. As I came closer to the scene, I 
could see vividly the results of the blaze. Dark, misty clouds of 
smoke billowed above the highest trees, forming a silhouette 
against the night sky. The sweet odour of pine from the day before 
had been replaced by the acrid stench of the smoke. And from the 
fire came waves of powerful heat which were not welcome on this 
already warm night. 

I looked deeper into the forest. As far as the eye could see was the 
same red, burning sight. Suddenly, instead of picking up the consis- 
tent roaring noise of the whole fire, I heard the individual crackles 
and pops of the undergrowth burning to ashes. At the edge of the 
forest, I spotted a quick flash of some movement along the ground. 
If indeed it were some animal escaping its lost home, then it pro- 
bably would be the last creature to come out of the giant, glowing 
oven alive. For the unrelenting fire further blazed its path through 
the wildlife. The giant, powerful oaks were now defenceless, like a 
caged lion battling a man with a loaded rifle. The flames engulfed 
each tree, dancing from top to bottom, then forcing down the huge 
structures, creating a wasteland of ashes and burnt wood. Quicker 
than I could imagine, the fire had sprinted through the forest. This 
process had devastated vast portions of land. Battered by the wind, 
rows of trees fell like dominos one after the other. And as the night 
passed, this breeze picked up. It fanned the flames, and they 
appeared to leap from tree to tree. Nature now offered no help, 
only the awful hindrance of the howling winds. By now, of course, 
nothing could stop the fire. Its brilliant march of destruction through 
the innocent forest was only beginning. 


John Rowley 



by Andrew Woods 

One sunny summer day in the park across the street trom my 
house, my brother and I were playing catch when suddenly the 
shrill screaming of sirens echoed across the open space. We rushed 
over to where the noise from the sirens was coming from. When we 
reached the summit of the embankment, we saw two flaming cars 
that had collided. After a series of explosions, the blinding flames 
had caught onto the grass and had reached the ravine. Within 
minutes, the ravine was filled with billowing thick black smoke. The 
greedy flames devoured everything in their path, turning beautiful 
trees into ashes. The noise was deafening, while the smoke hurt our 
eyes and filled our lungs, making it difficult to breathe. The heat was 
increasing rapidly, and my brother and I began to writhe in discom- 
fort. The flames looked as if they were trying to reach out and grab 
us. It was as if the devil himself had unleashed his evil power upon 
us. The bright red and yellow flames came closer and closer, until 
we felt that we were going to be consumed. My brother and I fled 
our location, until we felt that we were safe again. The fire now 
roared out of control. The whole ravine was aflame. It looked like a 
giant torch, and all sorts of small panic-stricken animals were scurry- 
ing and slithering out to safety. More sirens screamed and more fire 
trucks arrived on the scene. The air was filled with smoke, noise and 
confusion. The hoses went on and water showered into the flaming 
ravine and the fire began to moderate. The flames crackled in pain 
as sparks flew everywhere. The fire fighters began to close in on the 
weakened fire. Soon the fire was almost out, the flame glared at every- 
one, gave one last effort to regain itself, then flickered and died. 


by Joe Diebes 

January is the most dazzling time of year. As I tread over a hill. 
I am astounded by the scene before me. A thick white blanket of 
snow covers the hills and knolls of the landscape. A congrega- 
tion of oak and walnut trees stand, heavy with snow, bowing in 
reverence. This gathering of trees stands on one bank of a small 
waterway that has not frozen. The brook cascades over ice, can- 
tilevered on the edge of a hill, collecting at the foot where it is 
frozen. If this cold snap continues, the brook will no longer flow. 
On the other bank of the stream is a cluster of Douglas fir trees, 
regimented and dressed for the cold with their heavy green 
coats. The contrast between the dark green of the evergreens 
and the purity of the white snow is stunning. Before the brook is 
a large open field which is untouched except for the tracks of a 
winter hare that has darted across the open field and into a 

Adding to the clarity of this bright winter morning is the crisp, 
biting cold that numbs my extremities. The fumes of a far away 
bonfire permeate the air, overpowering the fresh scent of the 
evergreen trees. Winter birds chorus their piercing but peaceful 
tune, sounding like a child's music box, breaking through the 
serenity. The ever present peace here allows one to hear things 
that would normally go undetected: the gentle rustling of the few 
leaves that remain on the otherwise bare trees, the scraping and 
pawing sounds of a small forest animal among the trees, and the 
crunching of the crisp snow underfoot. As I continue my walk 
through the countryside, I realize how tranquil winter is. January 
is truly the heart of winter. 

John Rowley 


£ » \ \ 



J *-«***■*. 







by Ted Stephenson 

When Dick Howard retires as the Prep's Headmaster this July, 
he will have completed more than half a century's attendance at 
UCC. As a student, starting in 1928, he spent eleven years and 
distinguished himself both academically and in athletics. After 
graduation, he attended Trinity College, University of Toronto, 
where he took a degree in Political Science and Economics. Then 
it was back to the Prep, where he spent the next twenty-three 
years as a classroom teacher specializing in English. During this 
period, he was also the Senior Housemaster in the Prep boarding 
house from 1950 to 1966. When Alan Stephen, then the 
Headmaster, retired in 1966, Dick succeeded him and spent the 
next twenty years as the Prep's fourth Headmaster. The grand 
total of his time at UCC now stands at fifty-five years, a remarkable 
record and one that may never be broken. 

Length of service in itself, however, is no guarantee of 
greatness: it is the quality of service rather than the quantity which 
really counts. Fortunately, in Dick's case, the two were coincident, 
and all those who have been associated with the school in the 
Howard era have been the beneficiaries. 

Concern for the individual and attention to detail rank high 
among Dick's priorities and have contributed to his effectiveness, 
both as a teacher and as an administrator. In the years that I 
worked with him in the boarding house, 1 was impressed by the 
carefully organized routines he had established for the boarders' 
day-to-day existence. I was equally impressed by his ability to treat 
the boys as individuals, even when requiring them to follow the 
group routines mentioned above. 

Perhaps even more significant in his job as Headmaster is his 
ability to listen. No one could call Dick's approach to head- 
mastering autocratic or dictatorial. He has regular meetings with 
all of his staff and is receptive to the ideas that they bring forward. 

If, as he often decides, a proposed idea has merit, he will give it a 
trial run. Apart from these regular meetings, teachers are told that 
the door is always open if a situation arises that seems to call for 
immediate airing. This opportunity to discuss plans or problems 
with the Headmaster is invaluable, and I think goes a long way 
towards making the Prep a happy place to work in. 

Talking about Dick as an individual rather than as the Prep's 
Headmaster is more difficult, for he is a complex character. 
Although he is an easy enough person to meet, he is much less 
easy to get to know. His natural reserve and dislike of phony 
camaraderie make him shy away from large gatherings — one-to- 
one relationships suit him better. But even then, he remains a 
private person and one not given to small talk. A car ride with him 
where nobody says anything for 15 or 20 minutes at a stretch is 
not unusual. For people accustomed to non-stop talking, this 
much silence can be disconcerting. However, if the subject is 
important to him (education, the environment, current affairs, jazz 
or baseball), he speaks and writes fluently. Those of you who have 
read Colbourne's Legacy or heard Dick's address at the school's 
Annual Dinner a year ago are aware of his ability to express his 
thoughts clearly and succinctly, but most would be surprised to 
hear him talking knowledgeably about such individuals as Bunny 
Berigan or Ernie Banks. Actually, his interest in jazz and baseball 
goes back to his student days at UCC and continues unabated to 
the present. 

Now that it's time to say farewell to Dick, the parting should be 
brief and to the point, because that's the way he would want it. So, 
good-bye and good luck and thanks for everything. You certainly 
will be missed, but you've left the Prep strong and healthy — ready 
to face the challenges of the future. 


by Tony Hearn 

On August 1, 1986, Hamish Simpson becomes the 
fifth headmaster of the Preparatory School. In eighty- 
four years, the Prep has had only four Headmasters, 
J.S.H. Guest, J.L. Somerville, A.G.A. Stephen, and 
R.B. Howard. 

Mr. Simpson comes to the Prep from Lester B. 
Pearson College, where he has been Director for four 
years. Prior to this, he was Headmaster of Glenlyon 
School, a preparatory school in Victoria, B.C. He 
became Headmaster of Glenlyon in 1964, succeeding 
his father, who had started Glenlyon in 1932 — a 
difficult time in which to start a new private school. 
Under Hamish Simpson, Glenlyon changed from 
being a family business to a public corporation, it 
expanded, and it continued to maintain a high 

Mr. Simpson graduated from the University of 
British Columbia, majoring in history and mathematics. 
He continued his education at Princeton Theological 
Seminary, where he studied on a Rockefeller Founda- 
tion Fellowship, and later at St. John's College. 
Oxford, where he earned a Diploma in Education. 

In coming to the Prep, Mr. Simpson is reverting to 
what has been the main concern and love of his 
professional life, the education and welfare of boys at 
the Prep age group. 

On a visit to the Prep in February, Mr. Simpson was 
shown around the school by two Grade 7 boys, both of 
whom are "survivors" (i.e., they started in Form 1). 
Nobody knows the Prep, its nature and its needs, 
better than they. They certainly appeared to enjoy 
their time with their new Headmaster. 



\ , .:.■- .. 

Derek Webb 




This week I received a letter from an Old Boy, fifty years out of the 
College, in which he was critical of the degree of contribution at the 
political level made by graduates of Upper Canada College. In 
fairness, the writer may have been reflecting concern about the 
record of his contemporaries. However, by return mail I vigorously 
reminded my correspondent that in the last federal election, nine 
Old Boys contested ridings, and of these, six were successful, 
including The Honourable John Bosley, Speaker of the House of 
Commons, the Honourable Perrin Beatty, Solicitor General. In 
addition, five of six parents were elected, and one former faculty 
member failed to recapture the seat which he had held in two 
previous elections. All in all, sixteen members of the Upper Canada 
College community offered themselves to the highest level of public 
service, and eleven are now Members of Parliament. Not a bad 
record for any school at any time. It may interest readers to know 
that the highest rate of success among Old Boy candidates was 
achieved by those who ran for the New Democratic Party. Both 

I think perhaps my writer was also concerned about service in its 
broadest terms. Of course, there are countless ways beyond holding 
public office to serve others, but here again the current record of 
members of the UCC family is impressive. 

While not always the case in the past, the field of education is now 
one that attracts our graduates in increasing numbers "to serve 
them all their days". I can think of four university presidents in the 
past ten years, a flock of deans and professors, a growing string of 
heads of schools and platoons of teachers who were once Old Boys 
of Upper Canada College. Interestingly in response to an 
advertisement for teaching positions for the College next September, 
an enormous pile of applications on my desk includes six from UCC 
graduates. The academic profession is obviously now a more 
popular outlet for public service among Old Boys. 

The traditional professions as well as business, industry and the 
Arts, continue to attract large numbers of our graduates, and many 
are able to serve others through their work and their daily lives. We 
know also that an enormous contribution to public service 
continues to be made by Old Boys through their labour as workers 
or Board members of charitable organizations, agencies of the 
United Way, hospitals and universities and the full gambit of 
cultural institutions. While much of this work is recognized publicly, 
I am confident that much more occurs quietly and without 

No individual Old Boy has enbodied the service ethic more 
proudly that the Honourable John Aird, recently retired Lieutenant 
Governor of Ontario. Tirelessly and selflessly and through an 
extended term of office, he brought encouragement and support to 
thousands of worthwhile activities in this province, especially those 
which draw upon the dedication on volunteers who labour for the 
benefit of others. 

Encouraging the individual to put others before oneself is 
fundamental to personal fulfillment and to constructive and 
creative corporate life anywhere. No theme is struck more 
frequently in our morning assemblies and what rules we have about 
the school and expectations of conduct are based upon consideration 
of others. In a generation that is seen by some to be self-centred, it is 
encouraging to observe students respond each year to the needs of 
the United Appeal, to help stock the food shelves of Stop 103, to 

finance the building of an elementary school in the Tibetian 
highlands and to enable disabled boys to attend Camp Awakening 
for a summer experience, common to so many of our students 
through such programs as Interact, the Duke of Edinburgh Awards 
to work directly with programs for the disabled and disadvantaged. 
We could and should do more, but at least a vital tradition is being 
kept alive and one on which we can build individually and 
collectively. These are grounds for reassuring my skeptical 

R.H. Sadleir 

April 25, 1986. 



As I think about this year's leaving class, I find it difficult to 
describe the unique combination formed by the various individuals 
of this group in just a few words. At a school such as Upper Canada 
College, we have been able to satisfy our interests and achieved 
many of our goals due to valuable opportunities that we have been 
given. The high standards expected of us and that we set for 
ourselves enables us to become accomplished academics, athletes, 
musicians, and artists. Upper Canada has supported our creativity 
in these areas, and has provided us with a degree of self-confidence 
that, in the future, can be attributed to our high school years. 

The distinct personalities of the leaving class have made a great 
impact on the school this year. I cannot ignore the effects 
precipitated by some of our mistakes; however, both staff and 
students have learned and hopefully benefited from these. One 
direct result is already apparent - the leaving class has become a 
very cohesive body. It is a great experience to be a part of this 
closely-knit group composed of such different personalities, and 
the friendships made here could possibly be one of the most 
valuable aspects of our experience at U.C.C. 

I am proud to be a member of the Class of '86, and will be proud 
to be a graduate of Upper Canada College. 


FALL . . 


by Scott Sullivan 

1985 saw First Soccer get off to one of its most illustrious starts 
to a season ever. We blasted off to a 4 and record and began to 
gain some of the spectators first football was losing. However, as 
all good things must come to an end, our winning streak was even- 
tually cut short. 

As the season developed it was clear that TCS and Crescent 
were to be our nemeses. TCS was in our division, Crescent in the 
other. Although TCS did beat us twice, both games were close. As 
a testimony to the intensity of each game, the teams had some 
heated words with each other following both matches, and Jim 
Hayhurst even had a few things to say to the referee. Needless to 
say there was no love lost between the two sides. 

A similar state existed between Crescent and ourselves, and the 
season series included a game in which the play got quite physical. 
That particular game was highlighted by goaltender Mike Hill and 
two spectacular saves he made on free kicks. Although this con- 
test was played at Crescent, we were pleasantly surprised by the 
large contingent of UCC students present to cheer us on. Our 
thanks are extended to them for coming out to watch us play, des- 
pite our going down to a 2-0 defeat in one of the best played 
games of the season. 



The squad gelled in a short period of time and was extremely 
competitive, making the season a great success. We developed a 
reputation for being a physical team and kept this style of play up 
throughout the season. Our defence was solid, allowing only 29 
goals in 17 games. The midfield proved itself to be the strongest 
part of the team, anchored by team captain Andrew Heintzman 
and his dented shins. The offence was explosive when it got on 
track, as evidenced by a 6-4 comeback victory over Appleby, a 
game which saw us trailing 4-1 at the half. 

Jordie Valdez deserves congratulations for leading the team in 
scoring with ten goals. We were a balanced side though, with 
everyone who played as a forward scoring at least one goal. The 
team gained international fame when it defeated Cranbrook, a 
team from Michigan, by a score of 5-0. We even learned useful 
phrases along the way, such as 'Corvos' and 'Status Quo' from the 
language of the world, Latin. 

Sadly, we must say farewell to the grade 13's on the team who 
include Heintzman, Hira, Diab, MacKinnon, Wild, Wilson, and 
Jones. They will be missed next year. Our utmost thanks go to Mr. 
Bredin and his assistant, George Laczo. Without them nothing 
would have been possible. As the beloved Bump repeatedly 
stated, "It's a question of doing the simple things well." 


Front Row: G. Jones. A. Carragher, S. Sullivan, S. Diab, A. Heintzman, M. Hill, J. Valdes, D. Marcus. Back Row: Mr. T. Bredin. Mr. G. 
Laczo, N. Hira, A. Matheson. D. Wild. B. McOstrich. G. Wilson. J. Hewitt, G. Mann, J. Hayhurst. D. Turner, Mr. R. Sadleir. 
Absent: I. MacKinnon. 


2nd Soccer 

by Malcolm MacLaren 

Without question, the most important member of this year's 
team was former national team member Johnny McGrath, who 
served almost as a twelfth man. Arriving unannounced at try-outs, 
he volunteered his help to Coach Ian (have some more water) 
Fraser, who wisely accepted. 

Bolstered by some fine individual play by captains Doug (his- 
tory essay due tomorrow) Caldwell and Craig (big 'n powerful) 
Park, as well as Jeff (over the crossbar) Karabanow, Tim (walking 

wounded) Wilson and Mark (defensive saviour) Evans, the team 
finished with an 8-0-5 record. The team's skills and knowledge of 
the game, improved greatly over the course of the season, includ- 
ing a newly expanded vocabulary on how the English swear at 
referees. Witness the performance in the season's final game, in 
which the team came from behind to gain a victory over nem- 
esis Ridley. 

Good luck to next year's team a group will have their hands full 
keeping alive the 34 game undefeated streak so that everyone 
keeps "having a crack at it". 


IM6 Soccer 

by Jerry McGrath 

The under- 16 soccer team did have a 
successful season this year, despite its 6-7- 
2 record. The success came in a more 
intangible sense, as the spirit of the team 
was its strongest asset; we were definitely 
undefeated in enthusiasm. 

Coach Barillo picked a skillful team, 
composed largely of returning under- 15 
players and a few welcome newcomers. 
With hard work on some of the more basic 
skills such as ball control and heading, we 
improved immensely. The final tourna- 
ment at Ridley showed the team's progress, 
as we went 1-1-1 against good competi- 
tion. The goalkeeping team of Ian Digby 
and Brenden Caldwell was especially 
good, combining to hold the opposition to 
just two goals. 

The team was ably captained by Peter 
Hill and John Neal, who even managed to 
win a coin toss once in a while. Thanks also 
go to Fred Stupart for coming to that one 
practice! Good luck to all the guys on the 
team in years to come. 

* >mm Wf!&ijt 

>* > 


lM5a Soccer 

by Amer Diab 

The 1985 season proved to be a very 
successful one for the under-15a squad. 
After finishing third in the initial tourna- 
ment and losing the first two games of the 
season, the team went on to pile up eight 
consecutive victories without a loss, posting 
an 8-3-2 overall record. In the final tourna- 
ment we finished a strong second. 

The team's strongsuit was its consisten- 
cy, featuring a stalwart defence, a strong 
line of halfbacks, a very quick forward line 
and some much needed strength off of 
the bench. 

We were led by captain Russell Chong 
and assistant Andrew Turner. The goal- 
tending responsibilities were ably handled 
by Graham (surely you don't mean that) 
Shirley, who at one point churned out four 
shutouts in five games. 

Thanks go above all to Mr. Andrew Tur- 
ner who worked the team into the power- 
ful, cohesive force that we were. Thanks 
everyone and good luck to next year's 

U15b Soccer 

by Gregg Serenbetz 

This was the first season for the under- 
15b soccer team, and considering this we 
showed a great deal of talent and played 
quite well. The team's overall record was 2- 
1-4, however one of these losses came 
against a very tough under- 16 team from 
Albert College. The two wins were over Pic- 
kering College, as we outscored Pickering 
8-2 and 6-3. 

A newcomer in his own right, both to the 
school and to soccer, was Coach Adams. 
His guidance was invaluable in improving 
the individual soccer skills of the players. 

We played with spirit throughout the 
season, even after the aforementioned dis- 
heartening loss to Albert's. Much enjoy- 
ment was had by all, and the team wishes to 
thank both Mr. Brooks and Mr. Adams for 
their efforts and contributions. 

With such a strong nucleus of young 
talent at the school, UCC soccer can only 
improve when the players on this and the 
under 15a team reach the first team level, 
they will definitely make a run at the ISAA 
title. Don't worry Mr. Bredin, help is on 
the way! 


^m*»-. ■ 

If A 


"\ V J^* 



by Kent Jarvis 

Well, we didn't win the championship this year and, in fact, we 
were never really in contention. By all indications however, 
everyone enjoyed the opportunity to play and improve his skills in 
what can best be described as a building year. The team played 
close matches with TCS, SAC, and Ridley, beating TCS twice and 
SAC once to finish the season at 3-5. 

Although things may not have gone too well for the team as a 
whole, there were some outstanding individual performances. 
Jimmy "Downtown" Naiberg's 150-yard combined offence day at 
SAC is the first example of such an achievement that immediately 
comes to mind. It also deserves mention that this was his first year 
of kinship with the pigskin. 

Defensive captain Dave Probyn was an awesome force in the 
secondary all year, leading the team in tackles and being the most 
dependable man in the unit. Needless to say Dave "Earl" 
Campbell was dearly missed by the linebacking corps when he 
was sidelined late in the season. Dave will come back next year to 
anchor what should be a solid defence, with talent coming up 
from the under- 16 team. 

Sam Hardy deserves special mention for his performance 
throughout the year. Sam was best known for his newly 
developed "Sambo" shirt-tackle which must be seen to be 

The captains this season, besides Dave Probyn, were Kent Jar- 
vis on the defence and Trevor Farrow and John Viljoen on the 


Front Row: Mr. P.G. Crysler, 
Mr. B.A. Mackay, K.A. Jarvis. 
D.L. Probyn, Mr. R.H. Sadleir, 
T.C. Farrow. J. Viljoen, Mr. B. 
Briglio. Mr. G. Day 
Second Row: S.R. From, E.L. 
Charlton. S.B.E. Hardy. B.C. 
Conacher, T. Augustinas, B.A.N. 
Kindbom, J-F, N. Proulx 
Third Row: T.A. Christie, D.T. 
Fruitman. G.M.B. Smith. W.R. 
Plaxton. G.P. Boucher. G. 
Romanelli. G.S. Connor. R.E. 

Fourth Row: D.G. Deeks, D.L. 
Campbell, JO. Cape. R.S. Par- 
sons, J. PA. Benson. A.F. 
Archdekin. SA. Reynolds 
Fifth Row: A.D. Naiberg, T.R. 
Karon. S.B. Kerr, R.C. Field- 
Marsham, J.M. Ferguson, JA. 

Sixth Row: CF. Fisher, J.L.J. 
Caylor. B.R. Usher-Jones 
Absent: T.A. Cumming, D.F. 
O'Dwyer, J.G. Kemp 


offence. Trevor was the starting quarterback this year, after shar- 
ing the duties in 1984. Despite having his share of difficult games, 
Trevor shined in others, particularly at SAC when in a memorable 
moment he tossed a thirty yard touchdown pass to win the game 
in dramatic fashion. John Viljoen, a three year veteran, was the 
pillar of the offensive line this year. He was undisputably the 
team's hardest worker, and proved to be an indispensable asset. 
Trevor and John should be congratulated for their work with a 
very young offence, the progress of which is largely attributable 
to them. 

Thanks lastly are due to the coaches. Coach Crysler did the 
impossible last year in turning the second team into a winner. 
Given the circumstances he had to work with this year the job he 
did was no less remarkable. The defence was led again by Mr. 
Briglio, and his unit likely fared better than the offence because of 
the greater number of veterans. Coach Day deserves praise for his 
work with an inexperienced offensive unit. If the rumor that Mr. 
Day will not be with the team next year is true, then his presence 
will be sorely missed. Thanks go, finally, to Mr. Mackay for his 
work in patching up the wounded. There were an awful lot of 
them this year and it is to Mr. Mackay's credit that many players 
recovered from injury as quickly as they did. 

An afterthought. ..Good luck to next year's team! 


by Jim Andersen 

"Yay, we won." These words, heard after a 28-12 win over 
Ridley to close the season, seemed to make the fact that this was 
our only win of the year irrevelant. This win also proved to the rest 
of the school that seconds could actually win and maybe were not 
as big a joke as we had been labelled. 

Being that 2nd Football is the only school team that doesn't 
have training camp, it was a hastily organized and inexperienced 
squad that faced Ridley early in the season. The team did lose, but 
came up with a solid effort and the season looked hopeful. In our 
next three games we "lost", "lost", and "lost tactfully". A team 
meeting, a new team policy and two practices later we took on St. 
Mike's Juniors and although we were edged 21-18, the team 
showed a new-found dedication and an increased morale that 
were previously lacking. 

Even after another loss we were determined not to lose the last 
game against Ridley, and we didn't. Much thanks to Coach "don't 
worry guys, losing builds character" Bennet and Coach Benoit, 
who claimed tearfully, "Aw, the season ended just as our winning 
streak started." 



2nd Football 

U15 Football 

\ ^Pv ' ■» 

by Richard Usher-Jones 

The 26 boys on U.CC.'s first ever under- 15 football team 
played a total of six games, ending the season with a perfect 6-0 
record. In doing so they conceded only twenty-one points on 
defence, a commendable feat at any level. There was great 
camaraderie amongst the boys and a sense of unity which added 
tremendously to the team's success. For many players it was their 
first experience on a team, and they came away with a better 
understanding of what it is like to be part of a team and the type of 
commitment it demands. 

The team's caliber of play improved at a steady rate over the 
course of the season, and this trend should continue as this group 
progresses through the college's football program, hopefully mak- 
ing for a very strong first team in years to come. The boys can be 
congratulated not only for their successful season, but also for the 
perseverance and hard work they displayed both on the practice 
field and during games. 


U16 Football 

by David Viljoen 

It would be very difficult to find an 
appropriate 'Bear Bryant' phrase which 
would summarize the true nature of this 
year's under- 16 football squad. Therefore, 
to quote Mr. Payne, "It was awesome". At 
the pinnacle of a three year dynasty, we 
soared to an impressive 8-0 record. The 
team was guided by the ISAA's number 
one offence, and supported by a rock solid 
defence which featured players such as 
Simon Bregnazzi, Blair Wilson and Mark 
Hayman. This group often stopped threat- 
ening offences in key situations. 

When looking back on such an outstand- 
ing season, it is important to remember that 
this year's twenty two had not only talent, 
but also desire. The team endured heavy 
downpours along with recurring injuries to 
battle every game to the final whistle. 
Games such as the 20-16 victory over 
Appleby and the 22-6 season finale against 
Ridley boast a great deal of character on 
both the players' and coaches' behalf. 

Thanks go to Mr. Payne for his immeasur- 
able help with the offence and Mr. Miller 
who guided the defence and special teams so 
well. One can look back on the season and 
confidently say, "That's the way you do it." 



First Volleyball 

U-16 Volleyball 

by Vivek Rao 

Although we didn't get thousands of screaming fans "on the 
beach", First Volleyball did manage to win a few games this 
season. This fact puzzled us since we were a very young and inex- 
perienced team destined to go nowhere. Credit must go to Coach 
Poon who transformed a rebuilding year into a highly success- 
ful one. 

Despite the team's failure to win an exhibition game, we played 
well when it counted and finished with a league record of 6 wins and 
2 losses. Also, by way of near perfect play, we upset St. Andrews 
College to win the silver medal at the ISAA championship tourna- 
ment. Aided by captains Peter Hazlett and Honson To, Coach 
Poon achieved this goal by stressing basic skills and implementing 
the KISS offence. 

Even with our more than relaxed attitude, we did manage to 
learn a little volleyball and with the introduction of head-sets, 
cross-arm volleys and a bit of nose-play, we gave new meaning to 
entertaining volleyball. Thanks again coach and remember: 
BUMP, JUMP, and then - like Nambiar - CHUMP! 

by Lou D'Souza 

For the first time in the college's history there were two volley- 
ball teams; a first team and new under- 16 team. The under- 16 
team had 14 members from grades 9-11, most of whom had 
never played competitive volleyball before. 

Mr. Spicer, who is the captain of the University of Toronto's var- 
sity team, coached this rookie team to an unforgettable season of 
volleyball. Teaching the fundamentals and stressing teamwork, 
Mr. Spicer taught us that the score isn't the only facet of the game. 
In light of this, the 3-6 overall record and fifth place in the ISAA 
does not seem too bad. 

We hope to see Mr. Spicer next season, as well as some new 
talent to continue the under- 16 volleyball effort. Our thanks go to 
Mr. Spicer for his time, expertise and constant good humour even 
when we were playing below our potential. 



by Clarence Mah 

This year's cross-country team was one of aching muscles and 
sore joints, prompting one to wonder why anyone would consider 
joining the team. Could it be to experience the 'Indian Fartlek' and 
'Headache Hill? Definitely not! We began each practice at the 
oval with routine stretches and warm-ups followed by an 'enjoy- 
able' run, and by the end of the practice the team was quite 

However, hard work always has its rewards, and with the help 
and encouragement of Coaches Badali and Koenka the cross- 
country team had a very enjoyable season. Team captain Beau 
Hatcher led seniors, juniors, and midgets all to well fought vic- 
tories at the many meets attended this year. Placing second 
overall in a strong field at the TDCAA championships, the team's 
vanguard of Beau Hatcher, Scott Bailey, Fahlem Boyle, John 

Gardner, David Hughes, and Andrew Webster represented UCC 
at OFSAA and earned a place amongst the top runners of the 
province to end the season. 

Regardless of the final outcome of any given meet, there is no 
doubt that we had the loudest, most enthusiastic cheering section 
of any squad. An event which will doubtless stay in the minds of 
many people is when a certain UCC runner (whose name won't 
be mentioned by this reporter, but who goes by the alias 'the 
Maniac') transformed cross-country running into a contact sport 
reminiscent of Australian Rules Football. 

So, as one can see, the members of the cross-country team 
thoroughly enjoyed themselves this year, and everybody who 
joined the team was glad they did. Once again, many thanks to 
Messrs. Koenka and Badali, without whose constant support the 
team would have withered. 




by Colin Ground 

Never mind football, don't 
bother with team soccer, and 
don't even try cross country. 
Come out and participate in the 
real men's sport - House Soccer. 
This year's competition was as 
intense as usual, with enforcers 
such as Harold "death to you" 
Mousley, and Ira "come and get 
me P.W.B." Nishisato leading 
the way. 

Wedd's, Orr's and Scadding's 
all got off to fine starts and led the 
pack throughout the season. 
Jackson's came on strong later, 
defeating many tough opponents 
and gaining themselves a berth in 
U.CC.'s own version of the final 
four. Unfortunately Martland's, 
McHugh's and yes, even Howard's 
didn't get their feet off the ground 
until late in the season. Mart- 
land's played their best game of 
the season on the last day of 
regular play to clinch their first 


The final four saw overpower- 
ing Wedd's and Scadding's teams 
advance to the final. In the end it 
was the imports that came through 
for Wedd's, as they defeated 
Scadding's by a 2-0 score to win 
the championship. Creighton's 
revenge would have to wait until 
the house hockey season. 

There were many side attrac- 
tions to this fine season which 
made it even more interesting to 
the average spectator. The infam- 
ous "Yoy dance" will not soon be 
forgotten by Mr. Barber, nor will 
the newly perfected Howard's 
technique of slide tackling oppos- 
ing players. 

Congratulations to all who par- 
ticipated and to Mr. Morrow for 
outstanding leadership through- 
out the season. One question still 
lingers, and that is how does 
Scadding's always do so well in 
house soccer? Good luck next 
year, from a veteran. 

£ ' * 



by Alan Baldachin 

Despite the view of most of the U.C.C. student body (which, 
incidentally, is substantially worse than the view of the B.S.S. 
students' bodies), House Sports are a vibrant and vital component 
of interhouse competition, which ultimately leads to the award of 
that most coveted of all trophies - The Prefects Cup. (Not to be 
confused with the Stanley Cup, the Grey Cup, The Tea Cup, or 
the Upper Cup.) 

With the exception of House Soccer, House Sports take place 
predominantly at lunchtime. This term's competition was fierce, 
but as with everything else there are invariably winners and losers. 
As would be expected by even the most casual follower of such 
things, Jacksons rose to the top of the heap once again, followed 
closely by Scaddings and Wedds. 

This year's Ultimate Tournament provided some exceptionally 
spirited battles, with Orrs clawing their way to the overall cham- 


pionship. Volleyball saw Seatons claim the title by finishing first in 
both the junior and senior divisions. The senior final against Jack- 
sons was particularly entertaining, and everyone who witnessed 
the game left the gym shaking their heads in wonder. Tennis and 
Badminton were won by Wedds and Jacksons respectively, each 
sport providing a great deal of enjoyment and activity for those 
who took part. 

The house swim meet went off well for another year, thanks to 
Mr. Badali who again organized the event flawlessly. Participation 
was excellent and congratulations are extended to all who came 
out, either as spectators or as swimmers. A particularly outstand- 
ing performance was turned in by Bill Chalmers, who broke his 
own school record for the forty yard breaststroke. After all the 
water had settled Scaddings' consistency proved difficult to 
match, and they won the overall title. 


by Jeremy Alberga and Andrew Richardson 

For yet another year, Mr. Agnew successfully "converted" foot- 
ball and soccer players to rugby fans, and with the help of Mr. 
Matthews, this math duo taught both basics and new strategies to 
rookies and veterans alike. Newcomers who were hestitant about 
the violent nature of the game - "what, no pads?" - soon learned 
that contrary to popular belief, rugby bears little resemblance to 
Sunday afternoon wrestling. 

The high level of participation and enthusiasm throughout the 
season proved that once again Mr. Agnew was able to provide a 
valuable learning experience to grade nine and ten boys in the 
Intramural Rugby program. 

Hot on the heels of the rugby program was the soccer league. 
Every day for two months six teams played each other according 
to a fixed schedule. The emphasis of the league was on playing 
games in order to develop an ability to work with other players, 
rather than stressing individual skills. As the regular season drew 
to a close, a very strong Celtic team found itself on top, but the 
playoffs saw two underdogs, Hotspur and Thistle, ousting the 
frontrunners to advance to the finals. Refereed by the incompar- 
able T.P.O'D. Bredin, this exciting game saw Hotspurs gun to a 1- 
victory to take the cake. 

Much thanks goes to Mssrs. Kuzniak, Coleman, Mens, and 
McVeigh for a great season. With the leadership and guidance of 
these four dedicated masters, Intramural Soccer will no doubt 
continue to enjoy the success it has had in recent years. If par- 
ticipation does wane though, Mr. Bredin could easily fill the fields 
by asking the immortal question "But you want to play soccer, 
don't you?" 


jk ^m ^k ^^M^^^^&& 


by Mike Hill 

As has become an Association Day tradi- 
tion, the day began with rain. However this 
did not detract from the spirit. Beau Hatch- 
er started things off well with a victory in the 
Association Day run, upsetting the four- 
time champion, Old-Boy Bruce Trigg. This 
is the first time a student has won the race in 
a number of years. 

Our guest school this year was TCS - all 
of it! Mr. Wright managed to bring along 
the entire student body to cheer their 

With the rain drizzling on. First Soccer 
put up a valiant effort on a very muddy field 
but lost a 2-0 decision to a very strong TCS 
side. In other soccer action UCC faired a lit- 
tle better. The second team won easily, 
U 1 6s lost, and U 1 5s managed to gain a tie, 
putting TCS in front overall for the day. 

The jazz ensemble played a number of 
very impressive modern and classic jazz sel- 
ections in the gym to the delight of its lunch 
hour audience. The main floor was filled 
with club displays and presentations adver- 
tising particular activities. Miss B's collec- 
tion of UCC memorabilia was displayed on 
the walls of the main floor. As well, tours of 
the school were offered during the after- 
noon for all who were interested. 


The theme of this year's Association Day 
was to commemorate twenty five years at 
the new upper school. To this end, there 
was an intriguing display which detailed the 
architectural history of the school and the 
fate of the old building that was found 
structurally unsafe twenty-seven years ago. 
A reception was held in the quadrangle 
with our honoured guest this year, Major- 
General Bruce Matthews, a distinguished 
Canadian Forces veteran and Old-Boy of 
the College. 

In the muck and grime, the First Football 
team put forth a tremendous effort in the 
afternoon to defeat the TCS Bears 7-0. 
While the second team lost, both the U16 
and U15 teams won convincingly. Alan 
Baldachin, Vivek Rao and Adam Prusin 
barbequed burgers for the hungry crowds 
during the games. 

In the end, the day was a huge success 
and school spirit was strong, despite the 
weather. Congratulations to all those 



<!A&nc WL QAituLy 

by Ian Johnson 

Paul Midge's play "Out of the Blue" was a unique collection of 
characters and scenarios, centering around an absurdist plot. Per- 
formed in Laidlaw Hall from November 20-23, 1985, it was light 
entertainment enjoyed by all. 

The play starred Jeremy Robinson as Dewey, a shell-shocked 
ex-soldier, and James Ramsay as Harmon, his half-witted but 
loyal companion. 

The first act allowed the audience to get to know these people 
well. The setting was a dark and stormy night, with bolts of light- 
ning flashing across the sky, and rain pouring down on a meadow 
near the sea. Everything was soaked, including Dewey and Har- 

mon as they huddled in their pup tents. A recent typhoon had de- 
stroyed the frame of a house they had been struggling to build, 
and now the two were left amidst the downpour to contemplate 
the misfortunes of their existence. 

A host of other characters was soon introduced, including Dun- 
can Payne as Hawkins, a bothersome and ruthless detective. Two 
malcontent bikers arrive, their honeymoon having turned sour. 
They soon move off, and Crane, the blind and crippled alcoholic is 
brought on the set with the assistance of his emotionally crippled 
sister Arcadia, played by Heather Oland. Matt Doull came 
through with a strong performance in the role of Crane. 

Also noteworthy were Jeremy Harrison as deranged old Doc 
Burns, Brendan Fraser as tough-guy Wild Bull, and Ian Digby and 
Sonya Madden as drug-crazed hippies. 

Each character was plagued by insecurities and delusions, and 
seemed less than aware of his or her surroundings. To illustrate 
this, Midge brought three Russian officers onto the scene. They 
search in vain for a missing satellite, and come across as hilarious 
buffoons because they can't make themselves understood by 

What was "Our of the Blue" about, you may ask? It seems the 
best answer to this question came from one student who said, "It 
was very Midge". 

In ordc 


>r of appearance 














































ASST. 1 


ASST. 2 



































































*&LWO ^L &U&t' 

by Matt Sharp 

Back in September, the cast of "Out of the Blue" was presented 
with what seemed like an ordinary script. It soon became apparent 
that this was not the case. After two months of hard, dedicated 
work, the sixty member company put on an extraordinary play 
consisting of both drama and a bizarre brand of comedy. 

The opening night audience left the theatre slightly shocked, 
somewhat confused, yet thoroughly entertained. "I want this play 
to be one which forces people to think, instead of having every- 
thing fed into their brains mindlessly", said writer/director Paul 

The play's strong suit was no doubt its acting, which was 
generaly thought to be the best for a U.C.C. production in a few 
years. Particularly outstanding were James Ramsay and Jeremy 
Robinson as the two leads. The surprise star, however, was 
Matthew Doull as the blind, crippled Crane. Also worthy of praise 
is Jillian Madden, who turned in a solid performance as Cleo. 
Many thanks as well to the "Yacht People" who were notably psych- 
ed up for each performance. 

Our thanks are extended to the late-night theatre dwellers, who 
provided us with what can only be described as an 'original' set. 
Further credit must be given to the lighting and sound departments 
who were solid in their support. In fact the only thing missing in 
this year's play was the port. 

Unfortunately, there isn't space to mention the names of the 
entire cast, but thanks are due to everyone involved and 
especially to Paul Illidge for his undying encouragement, support, 
and numerous football analogies. 


j&turdtay November /16 th 

Paul ^ Jeim&s .Bmnel 1 1 






by Todd Christie 

This year's version of 1st Hockey had a moderately successful 
season. Not enrolled in the TDCAA this year, the team had fewer 
games and consequently had more time for practices and high 
caliber tournament play. In retrospect, this schedule might seem 
questionable as we were winless against American teams, but the 
team ended the ISAA season in third place with a 7-4-3 record, an 
improvement over last season. 

The squad showed a good balance of rookies and veterans; in 
fact two rooks (Eric "Mario" Meerkamper and Mark "Rat" Steele) 
and two vets (Andrew "Cummer" Cumming and "Captain" Dave 
Probyn) led the team in scoring. Our often stellar goaltending, 
anchored by Trevor Farrow and Dan Quinn, kept us close to many 
teams much better than our own. 

It must be said however, that this season will be remembered for 
much more than chasing that little black thing. Dam, we knew none 

of us were going to the NHL (scouts would always come to watch 
the OTHER team play), so above all we aspired to make this season 
a fun one. Images such as the relaxing card games, a quiet 
afternoon at Cummer's, the TV room at Cranbrook, and the 
"Wanking Posters" come to mind. 

Something must also be said for our coaches, Mr. Mackay and 
Mr. Brent Mackay. Although they weren't Glen Sather and Mike 
Keenan, what they lacked in coaching expertise they made up the 
effort, desire, and dedication. We weren't always the most 
committed players to be coached or the easiest guys to get along 
with, but the coaches did everything in their power to ice a winning 
team. I guess the rest was up to us. 

All the vets can say now is good luck to future 1st Hockey teams. 
What with much of UCCs opposition now recuiting fine young 
talent and invoking athletic scholarships, let's hope we find a way to 
keep pace. As for me, I'm waiting for Harold Ballard to call. 



Back Row: Mr. J. Mackay. Mark 
Steele, Andrew Frank, Craig Park, 
Phil Yuzpe, Ian Dalglish, Philippe 
L'Allier, Gaetan Romanelli, Eric 
Meerkamper, Andrew Matheson, 
Brent Mackay, David Campbell, 
Patrick Rummell, Kelvin Wong. 
Front Row: Trevor Farrow, Todd 
Christie, David Probyn, Andrew 
Cumming, Steve McKechnie, Pierre 
Boucher, Dan Quinn. 
Absent: Geoff Wilson. 


by Jim Andersen 

In a new system introduced this year, 2nd and U- 1 7 hockey were 
combined to form Junior Varsity. The JV team started early in 
November and after a few practices Junior Hockey-led by captain 
Spencer "Norman Bates" Lister and assistant Andrew "No thanks, 
I'll stand" Archdekin-was well on its way to a successful season. 

Backed by a team which was strong at every position, JV played 
an undefeated season and thereby gained a tie for first place in the 
ISAA with Nichols (the teams had one tie each). 

The season was punctuated with exhibition games and four 
major tournaments. The first two tournaments were not very 
successful, as we lost in the semi-finals of a home tournament and 
lost 2 of 3 games in Montreal at the end of the fall term - too many 
"Thumper" games the night before, I think. Nevertheless our own 

"Super Dave" Austin won a well-deserved place on the tournament 
all-star team. In the next tournament we did noticeably better, 
winning UCC's First Annual JV Invitational Hockey Tournament. 

The highlight of the season was the ISAA championship 
tournament at TCS. The team was severely undermanned, but 
"Ricco" Cape, Bildo "the Horndog" Hume and Ian "the stick" 
Charlton came up big on points and we beat TCS 8-5, Nichols 4-3, 
and Albert 5-2, thus clinching the championship. 

Special thanks go to half seasoners Jim Parkinson and David 
Stevenson, Montreal guest coach "Bryan" Adams, trainer Neven 
"Yous guys had a game today?" Blair, and especially Coach Turner, 
who put much effort into our 18-9-2 season. JV hockey! What a 
blast for a buck! 



by Scott Hunter 

A team with character is the best way to describe the U-16 
Hockey squad this year. The season started with five consecutive 
losses as we attempted to understand the new systems introduced 
by our coach. Yet, after many five o'clock practices and the addition 
of some new players, we were able to follow up by winning five 
straight. This success carried right through to the ISAA tournament 
where we reached the finals. 

Many aspects of the team contributed to its being so strong, not 
the least of which was the solid defensive play of captain Dave 
Viljoen and Scott Hunter. Other strengths were the bone-rattling 
checks make by the man wearing the 'A', Ian Blachford, and his 
trusty cohort Dan Thompson, the pin-point shooting from the 
respective blades of Jamie Shulman and Taylor Moore, strong 
goaltending from Jamie Rolph and Jerry McGrath, and lastly all- 
around efforts from Ian Kennish and Quinn McGovern. 

Many thanks are due to Mr. Briglio for his time spent coaching us. 
The team would like to wish him much continued success in the 

U16 Hockey 

U15 Hockey 


by Andrew Burns 

Responding to four straight losses to begin the season, the U-15 
Hockey team was an immensely improved squad when it came 
back from the Winter break. Bolstered by a few new acquisitions, 
most noticeably Micheal Bracht, who notched eighteen goals in all, 
and defensive leader Stuart Perrin, the team was well on its 

The first test after the break was a game against Pickering 
College, one in which Cary Hurwitz carried the team to a 4-3 victory 
with three goals and an assist. The first win was the turning point for 
us, as we finished with a record of 5-5-2, showing continued 
improvement as the season progressed. 

Among other notable achievements was a semi-final appearance 
in the UCC hosted mid-season U-15 tournament. 

In the ISAA tournament held at Ridley College we finished on a 
somewhat disappointing note, bowing out in the quarter-finals to 
Appleby by way of a shootout 

For the three rookie coaches, Mssrs. Benoit, Adams, and Hunter, 
much credit must go. They did a super job in holding up the team's 
confidence during some tough times. 



by Peter Hazlett 

Change was the word at the beginning of this year's 1st basketball 
season. A new coach in Mr. Procunier and eight new players on a 
12 man team. Pre-season highlights included a victory over Boylen 
H.S. at the annual MacKenzie tournament. 

Christmas brought even more changes. Three team members 
decided to concentrate on other things, thus we were forced to add 
Flick from JV and managed to hold our number at 10. 

We definitely had our ups and downs, but were kept loose by our 
M.I.P Charles Lewis and always relaxed by our shoe scooping 
chump, Nam. Two great roadtrips helped us stay together as a 
team. Syracuse was fun and Montreal will never be the same. 

Highlights of the season: Alex Wolfe tried to show Moo how to 
jam, but Mehm just wasn't up there. Pru was this year's Mott Cup 
King, as Wanda's was his palace. No respect was the speciality of 
VivAir. Sully kept everyone on the edge of their seats with his steal 
attempts, and Butt was the team's Most Valuable Bartender. Finally 
there was Phil, who exemplified the hard work and constant effort 
that helped this team remain on top. 

Next year should again be different, as Coach Procunier has just 
three returnees. Good Luck Coach P. and say hello to Tasha, Josie 
and Dani at Wanda's next year. 
1st Hoop '85-'86 

Back Row: M. Edin, P. Goetz, A. 
Wolfe, P. Hazlett, C. Lewis. 
Front Row: Mr. J. Procunier, A. 
Prusin, A. Nambiar, B. Girgrah, V. 
Rad, S. Sullivan. 


JV Basketball 

by Alan Baldachin 

It's a bird! It's a plane! No, it's Simon 
Bregazzi coming out of nowhere, stealing 
the ball and streaking coast to coast to 
score the clinching lay-up and secure a 
championship for the Junior Varsity Basket- 
ball Team. The celebrations commenced 
as J V brought home the first basketball title 
of any kind to UCC, in the words of expert 
Vivek Rao, "since about grade nine I 

However dramatic and hard fought our 
victory against Albert in the finals, it in no 
way overshadows the dedication, work 
ethic, and improvement that the team 
experienced throughout a highly enjoyable 
season. In his rookie season with the team, 
Coach Poon came to every practice fully 
prepared. Stressing fundamentals, his 
contention was that a team couldn't score 
too many points if they weren't able to 
execute some basic moves with the ball. 
Impeccable logic indeed! 

In spite of a losing pre-season, the team 
maintained high spirits as we sky-walked 
into January to play our ISAA schedule. 
We literally dominated the league, losing 
only one game and winning twelve. Along 
the way we hosted the First Annual UCC 
JV Invitational, in which we finished 
second to Senator O'Connor - a metro 
league quarter finalist. By seasons end we 
were ready for the ISAA tournament. 

Needless to say we captured the title, 
prompting the coach to utter those 
immortal words, "Way to go guys." Seriou- 
sly, much thanks goes to Coach Poon for all 
the hard work and enthusiasm he lent to 
the team. He set the example and provided 
the leadership that made it possible for us 
to go all the way. 

U16 Basketball 

by Nick Palmer 

To say the least the U-16 basketball 
team did not feel very confident at the 
beginning of the season, as one quick 
check of the roster showed us we were 
considerably lacking height. However, 
Coach Hood devised the stragedy which 
would carry us to a winning season - tough, 
agressive defense combined with a fast 
breaking offense. (Although not always as 
fast as Mr. Hood might have liked!) 

This style took us through the first seven 
games undefeated. The loss to Crescent 
which snapped our winning streak is largely 
attributable to an exhausting essay written 
the night before, and set by a certain history 
teacher who happens to wear flourescent 
socks. This same teacher must be thanked 
for his guidance of the team throughout the 
season, and for his unfailing, if not vocal, 
support. Also, thanks to the team members 
for a successful and always fun year. 


U15 Basketball 

by Stuart Wood 

U-15 basketball got off to a slow start 
this season. Coach OV was faced with a 
group of enthusiastic, yet inexperienced 
players. Starting with the basics he brought 
us along slowly, consequently we lost our 
first few games, however in each game we 
lost by a closer margin than we had 

We then won a few games and our team 
was on a roll going into our mid-season 
tournament. Faced with tough competition 
we failed to win a game. Despite this fact it 
was obvious to all that we played some of 
our finest basketball of the season. 

We finished with a series of close games 
including a 3-point loss to a Ridley team 
that had beaten us handily earlier in the 
season. Our trips to McDonalds, our bus 
trips, and our suicides were all memorable 
moments of the year. Many thanks to 
Coach Overholt and Asst. Coach Jeff 
Symons for a great season. 



by Andrew Steen 

Another swim season is over and the 
morning practices are just a reflection in the 
tearing eyes of team members... 

Throughout the season the squad faced 
stiff competition from the older, more 
experienced groups in the ISAA. With only 
two members of the team in grade 13, we 
sometimes found ourselves at a loss for 
points. However a promising young second 
team, led by captain Victor Chow, will 
provide a strong basis for next year's swim 

Our lack of experience was easily compen- 
sated for by a winning spirit. A strong sense 
of camaraderie bound team members and 
enthusiatic support of a fellow team member 
trying to achieve a goal was always there 
when needed. 

The team dominated the TDCAA finals, 
winning all three divisions and the overall 

men's trophy. At OFSAA finals the senior 
medley relay team placed second and Bill 
Chalmers won the breaststroke, setting a 
new OFSAA record. Bill, the Captain of the 
team, remained undefeated in the breast- 
stroke throughout the season while setting 
seven new records. 

Thanks are due to Ms. Spence for her 
work with the second team and Mr. 
Newnham who joined the coaching staff 
this year. The swim team was very fortunate 
to have the assistance of Miss Pepler, 
whose enthusiastic support and coaching 
expertise were an important part of our 
success. Of course thanks to head coach 
Mr. Eix for all his time, effort, and 
encouragement, and also for those MORN- 
ING practices! 

Swim Team 

Back Row: Mr. J. Eix, Brad 

McConnell, Rick Parsons, Steve 

Plummer, Rob Short. 

Third Row: Brenda Powell, Keith 

Johnson, Rex Sikora, Derrick Chow, 

Frank Hassard. 

Second Row: Rob Steiner, Richard 

Thompson, Victor Chow, John 

Thompson, Danny Steiner, Andrew 

Steen, Jim Smith. 

Front Row: Mrs. M. Spence, Todd 

Serenbetz, Richard Fortnum, Phi 

Hassard, Eric Shatzker. 

Absent: Bill Chalmers 



by Doug Deeks 

This year's version of the ski team again enjoyed considerable 
success at the Ontario Championships. The team placed a very 
close second to Lakefield, making it two consecutive years that we 
have lost the title by only a slim margin. Highlights of the meet 
included a first by Graham Smith in the slalom, with Bryce 
Conacher an eighth in the giant slalom. 

Unfortunately in the ISAA part of the season the team didn't 
participate very consistently, as coach Bredin's astute forecasting 
abilities kept the team from meets that would eventually be rained 

We were well supported on and off the slopes by Graham 
Moysey, Chuck Fisher, Bryce Conacher, Rene Brodeur and Coach 
Alisdair Wight. Due to solid team spirit we really enjoyed ourselves, 
despite the second place finish. Thanks to Coach Bredin for 
organizing another year of skiing au UCC. 



by Brian Sharwood 

Although small, the Cross Country ski team was strong this year. 
We made the most of our limited opportunities, as we were only 
able to compete in about four meets. Two of those were the ISAA 
and TDCAA championships. 

The past year has seen a revolution in the X-country ski world. 
Instead of the traditional diagonal stride, skiers have gone to 
technique called skating with which to traverse the course more 
efficiently. Unfortunately this put some limitations on our ability to 
compete with top-level performers, but the team is learning 

At the TDCAA championships Craig Sovka placed third and 
John Dickson fourth in the senior division, and Chris Chapman put 
in a good performance in the junior division. All three qualified for 
OFSAA, which is an admirable feat considering the high level of 

Many thanks to my co-captain John Dickson, and to Coach 


by Iain MacKinnon 

This year the first squash team learned the true value of a coach. 
With Mr. Koenka deserting the hardball team in favour of Australia, 
we were forced to fend for ourselves. Led by practice captains Jon 
"where's my Gucci bag?" Hausman, Brad "I've been on this team 
forever" Pielsticker, and match captain Iain MacKinnon, the team 
achieved its goal of placing second to a very strong Crescent team 
at the ISAA championships. 

The ten man team consisted of an assortment of characters, 
including James "I can beat anyone so I don't have to go to prac- 
tice" Hewitt, Kirk "What's practice?" Russell, and Murali "the 
Human Panzerotto" Chandesakaran. This was a season which saw 
us trying to explain to the Ridley coach why three members of the 



team never showed up for a match (they spent the entire afternoon 
driving around St. Catherines looking for Ridley), listening to Mr. 
Allen talk about Crescent at the ISAA after they showed up with 
only six members of a ten team, and hearing Hausman talk about 
everything from his Italian clothes to his uncle Gord. 

This was also the first year there were first and under sixteen 
softball teams for the entire season. Mr. Blakey directed both teams 
to winning seasons and will go down in the books as the first coach 
to introduce attendance sheets to squash. Finally, on behalf of all 
UCC squash players, I'd like to thank Mssrs. Symons, Blakey, and 
particularly Allen for their enthusiasm this season. 


by Nick Breyfogle 

During the Winter Term, 3:20 marks the time of day when the 
student's mind turns to house hockey. The skates are laced up and 
the sticks taped in preparation for this most gruelling and 
competitive of events. As the puck is dropped the game begins and 
the players dart about the rink, their skates getting caught in the ruts 
and bumps of the ice as the puck is lost under the inches of snow 
which fell that day. These not so great conditions are the realities of 
outdoor hockey, but with or without flat ice, the game must go on. 

House Hockey is one of those inveterate traditions at UCC, not 
unlike lunch hour and spares, that no-one would dare do without. It 
is our chance to show off our husky Canadian nature by exerting 
ourselves to the full, as we bare the harsh elements of the frosty 
North. This year, as usual, the season faced setbacks in attempting 
to complete the schedule. Early thaws, rain, and the occasional 
blizzard were among such setbacks, causing many a hockey player 
to wonder why nature had it in for him? 

All major traumas were averted however, due to the able and 
patient guidance of Mr. Barter and his crew of student representatives. 
The victory crowns for this season go to Jackson's in the Junior 
Division and Mowbray's in the senior, with the overall title being 
claimed by McHugh's. 

In other house sports action, Howard's claimed the junior title in 
house basketball while Seaton's captured the senior crown. 
Howard's and Jackson's tied for the overall championship, having 
to share the pennant for this year at least. Much thanks to Mr. Badali 
for organizing an exciting tournament, and to the first basketball 
team for their praiseworthy officiating. 




by Ian Pringle 

Any production of West Side Story is a 
tall order. It is made taller still when it is a 
school production drawn from a relatively 
small theatrical base. The Little Theater's 
version of this well-known musical, highly 
ambitious and long anticipated, proved 
highly enjoyable. 

The first mention of a UCC production 
of West Side Story was nearly two years 
ago. The barriers to the technical aspects of 
the show, especially the choreography, 
were immense. However, under the talen- 
ted directing of Mr. Colin Lowndes, the 
challenges were met and the result was a 
production that left the audiences with a 
sense of the cast's professionality and 

Credit must be given to Mr. Crone and 
the pit orchestra who mastered difficult 
scores and produced the wonderful music 
that is an intergral part of West Side Story. 
This music complimented a cast of perfor- 
mers who had tremendous energy and 

Hats off in particular to Miranda DePen- 
cier, Brendan Fraser, Susan Sanford in the 
role of Maria, and Greg MacMillan in the 
role of Tony. Their performances were 

Certainly all cast members deserve credit 
for the fine results they produced. They 
brought about a most enjoyable, entertain- 
ment execution of their aspirations on the 
West Side. 




by Mike Wallace 

At about 10:30 on the night of March 1, 
1986, the curtains closed on this year's 
musical, West Side Story, for the last time. 
For the almost 2000 people who saw it, 
seeing the show meant a commitment of a 
few hours; to the company of eighty, the 
show meant a commitment that was 
much greater. 

For many, the long hours of work go 
unnoticed because their work is only 
recognized when it isn't done right. Long 
before the cast stood in the spotlight, the 
lighting crew cleaned, adjusted, and focussed 
each light. The sound crew assembled the 
effects track and positioned the sound sys- 
tem. Without going overbudget, the pro- 
perty master collected all the props needed 
for the show. Literally, the largest contribu- 
tion to the show was made by the yumps 
who gathered at night to construct the 

Also not easily forgotten was the time 
spent by pit orchestra members led by 
"Captain" Crone and his assistant, Colin 
Furness, who also acted as the rehearsal 

For the "mere players", there were at 
least six rehearsals a week for seven weeks. 
While it was only the stage managers who 
attended every one, even the smallest role 
required an actor to attend most rehear- 

A great asset to the cast was the pro- 
fessional acting experience of Caroline 
Coltman, the acting coach. The expertise of 
the vocal coach, Mr. Sadler, was also 
needed and appreciated. The preparation 
and enthusiasm of our two choreographers, 
Seana Massey and Sam Sharpe made the 
dance sessions less arduous. 

Yet to be mentioned is the person who 
withstood our barrage of questions and 
opinions. Despite what he may think, our 
director put more into the show than any 
other two people. For the audience, when 
the curtains were finally drawn on closing 
night, it meant the end of a performance. 
For the company, it meant the end of 
something much greater, due mainly to the 
efforts of Mr. Colin Lowndes. 






-'':'-■''• '^/'i^. :■':■. '•'}£'' 'Jfc' ' ■ ■•..':.^v-^5«***t*^^'; .-./'•. '•'.■• : -„'-.. : ; . ■ •;'.'"-.. : ;*.•-' . ';;,''>■/ .; 

feMjvv-. 1 *- -. ..-, 


by Trevor Farrow 

Cricket: A game played with eleven fielders, two batters, two bats, 
a ball, and six wooden sticks anchored in the ground. This is all that 
many people will know about the mysterious and intriguing game 
of cricket. 

Hopefully the Upper Canada College first XI are somewhat more 
knowledgeable about the game, having been fortunate enough to 
tour New Zealand this March. While there we played against many 
strong teams, and faced some great batting and bowling from which 
we were able to learn a great deal. This year we have a wide variety 
of talent on the team. Our bowling is anchored by Chris Lewis and 
Charles Field-Marsham; a pair of opening bowlers whose in and out 
swingers riddle the bats of opponents. Jim Parkinson, Mark 
McClew, and Mike Hill also seem to have the knack of taking 
wickets at critical moments in a match. 



The strongest part of our team is probably our batting. Micheal 
Narayan and Graham Jones continue to be dependable batsmen, 
usually hitting a great opening score. John Cape, Mark McClew, 
and Paul Adams are now famous around the league for their ability 
to hit a "Parkway Ball" at any time. Dominic Rodrigues, although 
sometimes having trouble with his forward defensive shot, probably 
has the classiest shot on the team - "The Domo Corkscrew". A new 
member to the team this year is Dave Chalk. Even in the early parts 
of the season, he has shown the ability to enter a game at just the 
right moment so as to come "not out"! 

Mr. Brooks and Robin Bredin have been great coaches in both 
the batting and bowling departments, and, judging from our many 
successes, I feel that we have had a very successful and enjoyable 








by Malcolm MacLaren 

Frankly, it is hard to explain how this year's second eleven fared 
"suffice it to say we won some and we lost some." 

A solid nucleus of veterans returned from last year's successful 
team, as did the coach Mr. Procunier. All the other players were 
members of the U-16 squad, so inexperience was a problem. 
However, because of the unfortunately short length of the season, 
the team that is slow out of the gate, will most of the time, finish in 
the dust of the others. 

Second cricket is played in two leagues this year for a change. 
The first was of course, in the ISAA (minus Ridley - maybe to save 
face), while the Second 15, was in an indoor/outdoor Toronto 
public school league. The latter involved a different playing style 
and even a different version of the sport, as it is played within the 
confines of a gymnasium. Participation in the public league, I think, 
increased our understanding of the game and our appreciation. 


by Ross Healey 

As the bright afternoon sun warms the playing field, the under- 
15/16 cricket team takes the field, clad in their not-so-white 
uniforms. With veterans from last year's team returning, and many 
of the Prep first team joining, the season looked to be a promising 
one. Here are some of the sounds of the team in practice: 

"C'mon Moore! Don't hit the ball so %$*» far!!" 

"Watch where ya' throw the ball, idiot!" 

"I want this bat, you use the other one!" 

"Nice throw, bud!" 

"Good hit, man! You hit the car!" 

"I wanna bat now! You've been in there too long!" 

"You suck at bowling. Let me show you how." 

The sounds of a truly unified team, which owes its existence and 
its success to our coach, Mr. Bredin: 



and Mr. Monroe: 

"Come on in, fellas." 

So, to Mr. Bredin, thank you for another season of cricket, and to 
Mr. Munroe, thanks for your invaluable coaching, and have a good 
trip back to Australia. 



by Doug Deeks and Graeme Grant 

"Not play in the first team league! Well we'll see about your 
chances of making the team laddie." Such a comment was not 
uncommon at the beginning of the season as we only had 
thirteen boys to field two teams. However, we managed to get 
enough enthusiasts out to fill the first team roster, and while the 
outlook was bleak at the beginning, things came together soon 
thereafter. With convincing wins over Rosseau and North 
Toronto, as well as an impressive showing at the 7 a side 
tournament at Crescent the young team showed itself to be a 

With strong leadership coming from the aggressive play of 
Scott Sullivan, Jeff Mann and others, combined with the 
undaunted confidence of Coach Agnew, the year proved to be a 
good one. 

This year's U- 16 rugby team was made up of mostly veterans, 
well over half the team in fact, but as well we were strengthened 
by some talented newcomers including exchange students 
Toffer Winslow and David Hanna. The first practices and cold 
spring weather quickly separated the die-hard players from the 
merely curious and left a core of twenty odd boys who put in the 
time and effort needed for this demanding sport. 

From the early scrimmages it was clear to head coach Fraser 
and assistant Alasdair White, a teaching aide from Scotland, that 
this year's team was very talented and that another undefeated 
season was well within their grasp. Many thanks to Mr. Fraser for 
the leadership, experience and unity he provided to the team as 
head coach and as well to Alasdair who was with us rain, shine or 
snow, teaching us skills and sharing his knowledge of the game. 
Good luck to the team in future and thanks again to all those 
involved with the team. 




>»t*~- »»■ ■ 


by Brad Pielsticker 

The tennis team started off the year in a 
way that will be hard to match in the future. 
Seven members, including Ben Bradshaw, 
Chris Barnard, Doug Caldwell (captain), 
Scott Currie, Jimmy Fawcett, Brad Pielsticker 
and Coulter Wright, set off to New Zealand 
with the cricket team, to encounter the four 
'S's; sheep, surf, sun and... 

While in New Zealand we only lost one 
match. This was very good considering it 
was the end of their season and the 
beginning of ours. The match we did lose 
was our very first one, and this for obvious 
reasons: jet lag, wind, sunburn, court 
surface, and new raquets. We left New 
Zealand with a record of five wins and one 

Having won the earlybird tournament 
with help from Philippe L'Alliers' canon, 
and with probably the youngest team ever 
in the school, the possibility of winning the 
ISAA looks promising. With two grade 9's, 
Jimmy Fawcett and Coulter Wright, the 
tennis team appears as if it will continue it's 
dynasty at the ISAA. 



by Richard Press 

Last year the potential was there and so 
the team flourished. This year that potential 
is maturing and "dynamic" and "simply 
amazing" just beging to hint at what one 
can expect from the Track Team. It all 
began in November with a group of 
veteran, and highly dedicated athletes, 
assembling themselves under the guidance 
of Mr. Payne. Throughout the winter term 
these athletes trained and sweated as few 
have trained and sweated before them. An 
observer would occasionally mistake us for 
rowers. This observer would soon realize 
his folly as it became clear to him that such 
power, speed, and endurance was charac- 
teristic of the track team alone. 

Needless to say our efforts were well 
rewarded by our indoor track performances, 
highlighted (for this humble author) by our 
first place finish in the Cen-Tech medley 

relay, and our beating of Neil McNeil in the 
4x200 (thanks Sean). The mids, led by the 
team captain, Beau Hatcher, recorded one 
outstanding performance after another. 
There can be little doubt that most of 
U.C.C.'s school records are destined to be 
updated this year. Most important though 
was the base that winter training had laid 
down for our efforts in spring. 

In April five boys went down to Mansfield, 
Ohio to compete against schools from 
across North America. Though they didn't 
win, the performances that these boys put 
on was simply staggering. In particular 
James Dunda (who broke both the school's 
400 and 200 metre record) and the 
4x1600 relay team (of Beau Hatcher, 
Andrew Webster, David Hughes, and John 
Neal) who set a school record. 

The Track Team's future looks bright. 
We have a brand new coach, Mr. Benoit, 
who is enthusiastically coaching and recrui- 
ting throwers. Already the throwers have 
tripled their numbers, there are now three 
of them. Mr. Badali is back and is coaching 
the sprinters who, under his firm guidance, 
are progressing rapidly. Mr. Payne has 
decided to coach the middle distance men 
this year, ergo they will do well. Finally the 
jumpers, though I'm not entirely sure who 
is coaching them, (it seems to be a group 
effort of all the coaches), have increased 
their number by six and can only spring 
forward to greater heights. The future looks 
better than ever, and I'm just glad I'm part 
of it. 



"Hey Guys, What's With the Rowing Team!?!" 
by Mark Hyland and Duncan Wilson 

The rowing season started in the fall with a coxed four of Tim 
Hore, Craig Duffield, Grant Gush, Duncan Wilson, and cox Mike 
List. The crew placed first at the Head-of-the-Thames in London, 
Ont. and fifth at the Head-of-the-Charles in Boston, against a strong 
field of university sophomore crews. 

In November, the official start of regular season training, a record 
number of boys came to the tryouts. This original 25 to 12, leaving 
the final team total of 46 oarsmen and coxswains. Winter training, 
including running, weights, pool training and rowing ergometers, 
laid the essential foundation for the team's annual training camp at 
Princeton. The winter term culminated in UCC's hosting of the third 
annual Canadian Winter Indoor Ergometer Championships at the 
end of February. 

Despite a lumbering start by the heavyweights on the water, Prin- 
ceton proved to be a turning point, where the team, forced together 
in the cramped boathouse quarters, began to rally for the final 

weeks before the Canadian Championships. A very unified senior 
lightweight eight proved its mettle by pulling through both the now- 
defunct heavy eight, and also Princeton's Varsity lightweights. 

Now, in warmer weather, UCCs armada of three eights, three 
fours and five coachboats (with complementary coaches: Mike Nur- 
se, Larry Marshall, Mike Cookson, Dan ";" Coholan and Martin 
Mays) takes to the outer harbour daily at 6:00 am ("You mean you 
guys have to get up at FIVE every day!?!") 

The graduating members of the team are captains Duncan 
Wilson and Tim Hore, the ever-stalwart Craig Duffield, the Yankee 
newcomer Gary Bailey, the cuddly Frank Hassard, the Wide Awake 
Mark Hyland, and John "I.J - sorry you're last" Viljoen as the 
Beaver. At this point we wish all the crews the best of luck, and Mike 
Nurse and the returning oarsmen continuing good fortune in years 
to come. 


li: " -i 



by Iain MacKinnon 

House Softball, for those who don't have the benefit of playing, 
is softball at its most basic level. It is, rather than a game of inches, 
a game of errors, a game of offense, a game of poor umpiring, a 
game of yelling, but most of all, a game of fun and enjoyment. 
Most would agree that there is nothing like a field of grass, as W.P. 
Kinsella would say, "moist as chocolate cake with green icing"; or 
in our case, a field of burnt grass and dirt as dry as a parched 
tongue. Even still, the fields of Common's had the ephemeral 
odours of baseball right from the beginning of term. Everyone 
looked forward to playing ball on a warm, sunny day to relieve the 
tedium of classes. 

The warm, sunny days came and went and were enjoyed by all, 
but none so much as those from Wedd's, Mowbray's, Scadding's, 
and Jackson's. For these were the Houses that emerged as the 
ones to beat. Each had a well-balanced team of tight defense and 
solid hitting. The league was also introduced to commissioneer 
Hickman's use of official baseball rules which helped clarify many 
grey situations. 

After the last run is scored and the last out is caught the field sits 
in the orangey glow of the evening sun, remembering the fun it 



by Iain MacKinnon 

After softball, the highlight of this term's House sports was the 
increasingly popular House cross-country. As always, the thought 
of a mandatory 2, 3, or 4 mile trek on a warm spring day made 
some people wonder whether they were at a school or a Siberian 
labour camp. But after many sore muscles and miles of beaten 
grass the cross-country was won in convincing fashion by Wedd's. 
They swept each of the midget, junior, and senior divisions as well 
as tying Seaton's for participation with 100% 

Not everyone complied easily with this long standing tradition 
comprised of students sweating around a track while the faculty 
grins sadistically. For this year was the first "Walk of Peace" 
around the course, led by none other than the grade thirteens. But 

1 M 

Beau Hatcher didn't partake in the "walk", as was witnessed by his 
blazing pace. He won the senior, Andrew Webster the junior, and 
Nick Palmer the midget division. 

The follow-up to the cross-country was the "almost, but not 
quite as popular as the cross-country" track meet. It too was run 
successfully, only this time with not as much boarding House 
domination. The final two House sports are the lower profile 
cricket and squash. Cricket, as always, was dominated by those 
Houses with the most cricket team players and squash saw 
Mowbray's, Jackson's, Wedd's, and Seaton's battle in the final 
four. What really made this term's outdoor House sports a success 
was the great weather - the best in recent years. 












S 1 





top: Tim Dauies 

left: Ted Charlton 

bottom: John Viljoen 


Cathedral Terris 

by Ian Pringle Honourable Mention-Poetry 

In an obscure youth 

that drifts quietly 
in clouded chambers 

of an unconscious beginning 
I envisioned man's testimony 

to an omnipotent god 
as heightless temples 

of inestimable beauty 
and respect. 
Yet in a reflective mood 

which is spontaneous 
and humble I discern 

that what stands 
in the name of godly grandeur 

is more monument to man. 
For I have seen far greater 

witness to a power 
more than you or I. 

You laud the earthly beauty 
of Chartres and Notre Dame 

and call them old; 
god submits his own temple 

and my friend, in mind 
I have a place far greater 

which moves timeless 
and has no maker save 

time itself. 

From its nave 

unblemished blue 
yields to determined grey 

to prolific green 
to ethereal explosions 

of cerulean and white, 
ebony and vermilion. 

Spectres of peaceful power 
billow weightlessly 

above mortal concepts 
of construction. 

I asked you once, my friend, 
to go with me 

before it was too late 
and observe a boundless 

blue ceiling 
which yields its pigment 

to the water, 
to watch in silent prayer 

Cathedral Terris 
caressed by 

ponderous clouds 
that shift and change each moment 

that you watch. 

And now I ask once more, 

come my brother 
for there is but little time. 

It is crystal clear but still 
you do not see 

that amid the steel and glass 
there lurks a thing 

which is guilty 
first of ignorance 

and second pride 
and which is 

too close and yet 
too far from a forgotten 

Cathedral Terris. 
When we were children 

I sat in awe at the transept 
convinced of nature's endless life 

while you stole of the tree, 
but now our parallel lives 

have achieved manhood and 
I see you chiselling 

your own sepulchre. 

You moved the clock yourself 

and now the final minute. 
I asked, my friend, 

but you would not come. 
Again I sit at the transept 

and turn into the wind 
blowing from a nearby future. 

Now I watch ironic clouds 
of godless black 

and depressing morbid grey 
mushroom and then settle 

over the suffocated earth 
and drown in the destructive blast 

the momentary smiles 
which flicker hopelessly and then 


How long sweet friend, 

old brother mankind 
it has been since you and I were born. 

I have seen all, watched you grow, 
yet was permitted to do nothing. 

I recall with sorrow 
how the trees changed 

from green 
to red and yellow and orange; 

it should have been your 
finest hour upon the earth 

that autumn when you ran ahead. 
It is too bad 

that you misinterpreted 
your long forgotten punishment 

which was meant to teach 
and not to provoke 

a bitter ironic 
and vengeful ignorant child 

into smashing down 
the quiet gates of your 

Cathedral Terris. 



by Neil Seeman 

Honourable Mention-Poetry 

Night swoops down and steals our innocence. 

Strapped in fagades of crystal-white lambs, 
we begin to rip apart our suppressive sinews, — 
and unwind. 

Each apendage settles as the fervour commences, 
and we flare with wild fever, our eyes gold, — 
with wonder. 

Climbing higher and higher until we meet — 
the climax. 

But never wholly satiated. 

Sunday morning creeps in. 

Anonymous Insanity 

by Motek Sherman Honourable Mention-Poetry 

Neon Backlit 


Float down from 

Nirvana Central 


Swandive into 

my Drink while 

Carnivorous Soap Bubbles 


in Epileptic 

Machinegun Fire 


Coat my 

Naughahyde Suit 



Krazy Glue as I 


Bright Molotov Cocktails 

which Implode 


on my 

Ivory Toes as 

Terroristic Hippos 

start Cavorting Ineptly 

on the 

Linoleum Chandeliers 

while Crushing 


Mouse Traps 

Which Fill 


Dead Animal Shoes with 

Happy Feet 

and Melt the 

Synthetic Shoelaces 

Which Flutter 


Outer Space. 


Keith Barry 


Craig Duffield 

Ted Charlton 


Dark Places 

by Graham Sanders Honourable Mention- Fiction 

There's this guy. And he's walking down the street. It's downtown 
and everything is sort of dark and wet like just before the sun's up 
but it's really about three in the afternoon. The sky is low, real low, 
and all patchy like an old blanket. All the people are walking by with 
their hands in their pockets. They're staring down at their feet or the 
shiny concrete sidewalk. Everybody looks like they're wearing black 
even though they aren't. And everything else looks grey with a sort 
of sheen to it like an old spoon. Little cafes and restaurants are all 
down the street and lots of people huddle around short tables and 
counters and talk about nothing. You can see them through the 
glass that's got water running down it; sort of like it's sweating. It's all 
like some postcard of Paris on a rainy day even though it's just 

Now I've painted a pretty picture of it, let's see where you fit in. 
You're walking behind the guy that I talked about before. You've 
got your hands in your pockets just like everyone else. You've got 
one of them p-coats on that's so blue it looks black. And me? I'm 
watching it all. 

I can see you thinking right now since I'm right behind you. 
You've got little wheels and gears in your head and they're spinning 
around real fast; so fast that I can hear the little high hum. You drop 
your ideas in there and they get all munched up in the little wheels. I 
don't have no wheels. I'm just eyes and ears and a pen. 

So, the guy starts to walk a little faster, like he's late or something, 
and you walk faster too — so do I. he comes up to a traffic light and 
that big orange hand lights up so he stops. That orange hand is the 
only thing with colour; like it's the only living thing in sight. You and 
me and him, we're just grey and black things walking down the 
street. I stare at that warm orange hand until it goes out and the little 
walking man lights up. It's funny, he's got no colour either — just 
pure white. 

I let my chin fall and look at you again. While he was waiting for 
the hand to turn into a man you caught him up a little. Now you're 
walking behind him, right behind him. he doesn't take any notice of 
you. It'd bother me if you were walking that close. The wheels in 
your head are almost melting they're spinning so fast. Now I know 
you're up to something. 

He turns a comer and start walking down a side street. You turn 
too. this street's sort of deserted. It's just you and him and me and 
the trees. They're big tall skeleton trees all down the sides, one in 
each front lawn. They've got rough wet bark that's sort of light on 

the ridges and black in the crevices. And they're tall black lamp 
posts too with white balls on top. In the middle of each ball there's a 
glowing spot and a kind of shiny circle of light all around when you 
squint your eyes. It makes you feel sort of cold. 

I'm looking at you and him pass in and out of the fuzzy patches of 
light on the slippery concrete. It's dark now. You and me and him 
have been walking for a good while and I didn't notice the time go 
by. He checks his watch and so do you. I look at my bare wrist then 
up at the houses we're passing by. Their fronts are all kind of funny 
and flat. The porches and windows all dark. 

When I look back in front of me I can't see him or you. Then, in 
couple of steps, you then him come out from dark places on the 
concrete and move into the light patches. 

He steps into another dark place and you hurry up so you're in 
the light patch right behind him. I don't know why he doesn't notice 
you. Maybe he knows you're there but he's just ignoring you, hop- 
ing you'll pass him. You're fiddling with something in your pocket. 
Maybe it's a knife or a gun. I wonder if you know I'm right behind 
you. What if I have a knife? What suprise: stabbing someone and 
feeling the metal go in your own back. I look behind me. No one 
is there. 

I turn back around and you and him aren't there. I stop and wait 
for something to happen. No one steps into a light patch. I can't 
hear your wheels spinning anymore. I guess you've done whatever 
you were thinking about doing so you don't have to think no 

I start to walking again and I'm getting closer to where you and 
him must be, in that dark place there. What're you doing to him I 
don't know. Maybe you stabbed him and he's dying on the ground 
while you go through his wallet. Maybe you got a gun to his head. 
Maybe you're good friends and you're talking — but I don't hear 
nothing. Maybe you and him just sort of melted away and got 
washed into the gutter. I look into the dark but I don't see nothing 

I step between the parked cars. They're wet and sparkly when the 
light hits them just right. I'm walking down the middle of the street 
with my hands in my pockets, staring at the slick tar. After a little bit, I 
hop back onto the sidewalk. I didn't try and look at them. They're 
still back there in the dark and I didn't even have it to go over and 
find out what was going on. I'm just eyes and ears and I hate it. 


1 ( 15 


top: Andy Houghton 

left: John Heppolette 

bottom: John Viljoen 


Love & Velcro 

by Graham Sanders Winner-Poetry 

it comes 

toge ther 

quickly and 

quietly and 

holds fast. 

when you no 

longer need 

it it 

ri ps 

with a 

terrible noise 


1 fc 

r L n 

$E "*, 








^ m. . ■ ; | 1 

Peter Lee 

Ken Beatty 

*> . • V 



left: Tom Percival 

top: Keith Barry 

bottom: Andy Houghton 


Glynn Dyvi's eyes blinked wearily from the depths of a blackened 
face. The orange sun was not yet at the horizon, and it was still chil- 
ly. A Welsh coalminer, he was used to unusual hours. He felt the 
musty, blackness of the earthworms around him. His hands, with 
the rough smoothness of carved stone, flexed. His short stubby 
fingers came together, crossed, and the knuckles cracked. A 
matchbox was slid open, and a match struck. Glynn lit his last 
cigarette, inhaled deeply, and lay back luxuriously, smoking in 

It was Christmas day. His day off. He glanced down and stared at 
the end of the cigarette, mesmerized. It was bright orange and shed 
a cheerful, comforting aura of light and warmth, cupped in his 

A sudden scabbling came from the dark, about ten feet away. 

"Aww, Jesus Christ, what bloody time is it?" 

"Hello Tommy. Happy Christmas," said Glynn. 

"Yeah, yeah. ..Happy Christmas Glynn. Hey..." his eyebrows 
raised, "hey, have you got another fag fer yer mate?" he asked 

"Sorry Tom, it's my last." 

"What a day. Christmas, yet I'm muckin about 'ere, and I 'aven't 
even got a bloody cigarette," swore Tommy savagely. 

"Yeah, well at least Nero gave us the day off," said Glynn 

"Bloody good of 'im. A'm tellin you though, a'm gettin bloody 
tired of 'im or any other boss. Us workin lads do all the dirty work, 
take all the risks and then the bosses go and take all the credit. I'd 
like to see what bloody Nero's 'avin for Christmas pudding this 

Both men lapsed into silence. The sun was now over the horizon, 
taking the bite off the December cold. A cool wind blew from west to 
east. All of a sudden, in the distance, shouts of laughter were heard 
and the notes of a Christmas song rose and floated away. Glynn 
and Tommy could hear only snatches as the wind blew the song in 
the opposite direction. 

"Bloody Christmas carols. .." whispered Tommy dreamily. "Well, 
know what I'm going to do, I'm going to go say good mornin' and 
'ave a happy Christmas." 

"No Tom, no What if Nero comes?" 

"to hell with Nero, and all his kind. A'm going" Tom replied blunt- 
ly, and was gone. 

"Don't risk it boyo!" called Glynn, "he's a fool". He said this with 
gritted teeth. 

All of a sudden the sound of heavy boots approached from 
the earthworks. 

"'Appy Christmas Glynn." 

"Mornin' Glynn." 

"'Ello Glynn." 

"Not now, not now. Tommy's gone over to sing with them 
bleedin' nightingales." 



"Flippin' Heck!" 

"Well, there's nothing we can do, except cover for him if Nero 
comes. Come on, let's have breakfast and sing a few carols of our 
own," said Glynn sighing. 

The sun rose higher in the sky; it was midmorning when they 
finally finished a slow, cold breakfast, frequently interrupted by 


A Working Lads Christmas 

by John Neale 

First Place-Fiction 

another carol. After breakfast they each sat back in silence. Their 
reverie was finally broken by Tommy as he jumped back down 
beside them, coming from nowhere. And he was not alone. 

"Well, I'm back," he said cheerfully. "Don't just sit there! Aren't 
you going to say 'ello?" 

"These Jerry," he said briskly, "these are my mates, believe it or 
not. From lookin at 'em you can see how low I've sunk!" 

"I am very pleased to meet you all." he grined good-naturedly, 
showing his straight, white teeth. His rough clothes showed him to 
be a working class boy. He had sparkling, bottomless grey eyes 
which showed his good humor. His short blond hair was also dirty 
from hard work. 

"Listen up... One of Jerry's mates 'as a tennis ball and we kinder 
thought we could 'ave a little scrimmage, see?" said Tommy. "Us 
against them." 

"Yes, my friends love football too," said Jerry. 

There was a moment's pause, and then everyone jumped to their 
feet, yelling appoval. Two goals were swiftly set, and white corner- 
flags, using hankerchiefs, were measured carefully. Friends known 
to Tommy and Jerry poured onto the "field" and the game started. 
There were many substitutes, because players didn't want to leave, 
and frantic shouts cheered each team. 

"Come on Tommy. Get that one back." 

"Good Jerry, good." 

The beating of heavy boots on hard ground rumbled. Fouls were 
taken good-naturedly as a matter of course. Although both sides 
scored often, a count was not made, and neither team could gain 

the upper hand. Christmas Day slipped away, and the sun started to 

All of a sudden a deafening roar stopped play completely. 

Nero!" breathed a dozen, in hushed voices. 

The clean-shaven, spectacled face had turned a florid pink. His 
lily-white skin shook with anger. 

"You will all return to where you came from! Severe discipline is in 
order! Dyvi, I want to see you at once!" 

the men dispersed silently, rapidly. Glynn's heart pounded in 
fear. His face had gone white. He shivered in cold. The sun was very 
low in the sky. It was almost dust. 

"Stand straight!" barked Nero, his spectacles flashing in the face 
of the sun, hiding his cold, slick, marble eyes. "You are the highest 
ranking man that was out there." He spun around, his long shadow 
in front of him. 

Finally, through clenched teeth, his back still to Glynn, Nero 
managed to bellow, "You are hereby court-martialed. You will be 
tried in the morning, and then you will be shot. Furthermore..." 

But he was not allow to finish. There was a sharp crack and a 
searing whine. The glass of his left spectacle tinkled and a red mist 
sprayed from Nero's left eye. Jerry had heard all and they had given 
one last Christmas present. 

A corner flag lay in the mud, the white hankerchief no longer 
white, forgotten and trampled. 

The sun, now blood-red, set on France and the Western Front, 
December 25, 1914. 


Jamie Shulman 


Graham Grant 


Nothing can be anywhere near so inscrutable as the amount of 
media attention paid to the recent explosion of the space shuttle 
Challenger. If one considers the bare facts he can see that seven 
people were killed in the tragedy, which is considerably fewer than 
the number of American motorists who probably lost their lives in 
the same twenty four hours. Furthermore, the Vietnam War 
casualties didn't get nearly the attention. And to get right down to it, 
instantaneous explosion is just about the best way to go. There are 
hundreds of political prisoners being subjected to slow torture, and 
millions determinedly starving in Ethiopia, but no one seems to care 
as much about that. 

It is easy to think of explanations for the over-dramatization and 
hard to know which one is right, or whether it is the result of collec- 
tive influences. The first thing that comes as evidence is Super bowl 
Sunday and the propensity the neworks have to create drama 
where none exists. Remember that footage we saw of a child plead- 
ing ominously to the camera for her mommy not to go? And do you 
remember the film of that group of students so happy at the shuttles 
take-off, and so silent 90 seconds later when the explosion 

Blowing Things Entirely 
Out of Proportion 

by Kent Jarvis 

First Place-Journalism 

This is hardly responsible journalism, it is disrespectful certainly 
to those mourners who should deserve better than to be placed in 
some TV drama that is all too real. The explosion (in this case of an 
explosion!) is not singular to Super Bowl hype. The networks, 
especially in the U.S., give similar treatment to their "gripping" mini- 
series and, even more disconcertingly, to their coverage of the daily 
news. The problem the networks had in this case was deciding 
whether this particular event was worthy of huge coverage or not. 
None of them were sure, one imagines, and then one of them went 
ahead with the coverage, full steam, and the others, not wanting to 
appear negligent in their journalistic responsibility, had to follow 
suit. The result of that sad chain of events was a news media 
coverage that didn't know where it had come from or where it 
was going. 

Of course there was public as well as media concern for the disas- 
ter, and the media go-ahead was largely based on the way it thought 
the public would and did react. It was not, as has already been 
stated, a human tragedy. Most Canadian citizens were deceived 
into thinking that they were mourning the loss of seven astronauts 
when what they really suffered from was a lack of faith. 


People like to take certain things for granted. Even though the 
shuttle had no part in the life of the average North American citizen, 
he took comfort in the fact that a safe shuttle mission could always 
be depended on. It gave him a sense of control, if only vicariously, 
over his world. When the accident occured it became one more 
uncertainty in his life. It is bad enough that the individual has to 
worry about losing his job, about what he is going to do after retire- 
ment, and about whether there will be a nuclear war tomorrow, 
accidentally or by mutual consent. 

The space shuttle disaster also had an important effect on the 
American psyche in terms of their national feeling. In the year 
1986. America has its most popular President ever in the oval 
office, the economy has just experienced a tremendous recovery, 
and the government has just concluded encouraging summit talks 
with Gorbachev of the Soviet Union. In fact, on the very day of the 
"tragedy" Reagan was to give his annual address. The situation was 
perhaps in some ways similar to that in the 1960's under President 
Kennedy just before his assassination. Both Kennedy's murder and 
the shuttle crash (the latter much less) shattered American's faith in 
a country they saw only as moving onward and upward. 

Then, perhaps, there is the real, unspoken tragedy which is going 
to move those in the U.S. more than any funeral ceremony ever 
could. In America, the land of money and military, there can be 
nothing more grave than the loss of one quarter of its shuttle fleet, at 
a replacement cost of some three billion dollars, not to mention the 
lost revenue from scheduled shuttle flights that will now have to be 
cancelled. Add to this the fact that Reagan's Star Wars space pro- 
gram depends on the shuttle program for assemblage of anti- 
ballistic lasers (or whatever is supposed to be put up there). 

The most insulting ramification of this event was the moment of 
silence for the dead astronauts. Granted, one ought to pay tribute to 
the deceased, but there are millions of people who pass from this 
world to the next, and because of their less conspicuous cir- 
cumstances, we allow them to do so without paying the slightest 
notice. The only official moment of silence, to my knowledge, is that 
paid for those servicemen who gave their lives during the two world 
wars. Those people were heroes who did their duty despite the fact 
that they were going to die. A group of seven people, who had no 
inkling of their fate and who died instantly, instead of bleeding from 
bullet wounds in the belly, do not deserve the same reverent 


top: Peter Lee 

left: Gerald Rubin 

right: John Viljoen 



left: Nica Cape 

bottom: Jim Smith 

right: Ben Richardson 




Inside: Dick talks with the heads of horses 



"This morning's reading" ...Murali put his 
audience in a captivated, spell-bound state, 
then somehow hypnotized himself during 
his reading. 

"To sleep or not to sleep..." In the middle of 
Hamlet's most famous soliloquy, Murali 
decided the pathos and hubris were too 
much and went to sleep. 

"Spare-period 2" ...Murali, exhausted by 
Shakespeare's literary masterpiece, feels 
he deserves a quick, little 55 minute 
snooze. ..After all, the night before he only 
had 17 hours of sleep. 

"System crash, period 3." During recess 
Murali had another 'quickie' up in his room 
in Seaton's. This obviously was not enough 
though, as he crashed during his computer 

"Lunch time!!!" Even after a hearty Saga 
foods meal, Murali still found it difficult to 
resist taking a short nap. 

"Chemistry Lab test..." It looks like Murali 
was playing a little too hard with Marvin 
and Milli. After quickly finishing his lab test 
of sulphuric acid, Murali went at it again... 
After school - more of the same. 

; , 

Rich, I want you to can all beer jokes 

The contents of this humour section are intentionally slanderous. 
They are meant to hurt and insult. If they don't, we apologize. 


First there was Freud; 

Then the kids were supposed to play 

Fisher Price... 

Now, to grow up normally, you need.... 



"The man behind the Man" — Time 

"He solved all my problems" — Tex Coleman 

"One of the few people who really understands me" — 

Johnny Elix 

Dear Prof. Froots, 

Hi. My name is Dick Sadleir. First of all a brief note of 
thanks for helping me with my last problem in thinking 
of all those wonderful duties I perform as a Principal. 
When I read them out in Assembly I could tell that the 
boys were really impressed. It has come to my attention, 
however, that certain teachers are usurping my power in 
Prayers. The teachers will run up ahead of me and stand 
in front of the podium. I didn't mind when Zeke would 
occasionally take over and force the boys to sing hymn 
186 -all twelve verses. I just didn't go to those Assem- 
blies. Besides, letting Zeke have a little power keeps him 
happy. These other teachers are setting out of hand, 
though. What should I do? 

Dear Dick, 

Appoint these power hungry teachers positions with powerful 
names. Vice Principal of Academic Studies or Chairman of 
Faculty Discipline for example. This will also give you an oppor- 
tunity to get rid of some of Zeke's workload that he keeps com- 
plaining about. 

7 must remember to change this nameplate" 

"Miss Foley, send in Dick" 

Dear Prof. Froots, 

Hi. My name is Kent Jarvis. Last week I found out I was 
a steward. This week you might have seen me standing 
in front of a podium in morning Assembly. Well, some- 
one told me I wasn't making sense. People had given me 
notes with garbled messages in a foreign code (I suspect 
the U.C.C. corpse). Needless-to-say I felt very silly when 
people began to laugh at me. Though it might be radical, 
I don't think the U.C.C. corpse is an organization to be 
laughed at. And under Lord Sadleir's feet (even if they 
are pronated) is a perfectly reasonable place to stand. 
You can understand my problem, Please help!! 

Dear Kent, 

Obviously you are a victim of sexual frustration (and/or 
molestation). I can only suggest what Freud, himself, would have 
suggested; come in for a full check up. Don't worry, I won't extra- 

Prof. Froots, 

There are louts in the school! Aye, laddie, I'm referin' 
to the oafs who seem f have forgotten the school dress 
code (I think these are the same wee laddies who hold up 
Assembly with those damn notices). I say • away with 
them. Aye, we get rid of them once and for all. They 
either dress like me- ie. well, a sensible conservative 
dress (I don't mean no kilt, laddie)- or are gated. Gated, 
why? Discipline, God knows these boys need it. 
Ian "tuck in yer shirt" Agnew 

Dear Ian, 

I feel the same way. I too have been trying to get people to 
dress like me. I also think discipline is a great idea; the very 
thought of it makes me tickle all over. So, I suggest we form a 
committee to study the feasibility of this suggestion. 




(ie. What they say... When they really mean). 

When Mr. Lowndes says: 

Ah, Intriguing! (and raises only one eyebrow.' 

He means: 
That idea sucks. 

When Mr. Sadlier says: 

Ahm, it has come to my attention... 

He means: 

Mrs. Foley told me before Prayers this morning... 

When Mr. Mens says: 

He hasn't been doing a good job with the younger boys 

He means: 

He's too much of a rebel to be head of house. 

When Mr. Slemon says: 

Uh, actually, 1 didn't plan on teaching this today. 

He means: 

I have no idea what's going on. I'll have to ask Mr. Allen 

about it tonight. 

"You say you love we for my personality?" 

When Mr. D. Matthews says: 

Some of our students find they excell in smaller universities. 

He means: 

By now, Trent, DeVry, and Seneca all have you on their 

mailing list. 

When Tim Young says: 

I like getting outdoors and exercising. 

He means: 

This weekend I'm going to Norval where I will pretend to 

shoot Communists. 

When Ira Nishisato says: 

No, last year's humour section didn't bother me. 

He means: 

If those S.O.B.'s do it again they're not coming to WAC '87. 

When Ms. Spence says: 

Would Mike Slinger report to the library immediately after prayers 

concerning overdue books. 

She means: 

Geez, being a librarian is so boring, I hope that handsome boy 

Mike won't mind chatting for a few minutes. 

When Mr. Brooks says: 

Sounds like you boys had a really great time on that trip 

He means: 

I can hardly wait to tell Dick. 

When John Viljoen says: 
Have a nice day. 

He means (scarily enough): 
Have a nice day. 



STEP 1: Leave the school. 

STEP 2: If step 1 doesn't work rip out these pages and keep them 

with you until (if) you graduate. 


Mr. Agnew: 1 ) Don*t ridicule him to his face -even if he is wearing 

a skirt. 

2) If you find you're late for one of his classes remark on how 

much you like his green tie. 

Mr. Bredin: (See gatings and detentions) 

Mr. Adamson: (See Mr. Bredin) 

Mr. Lowndes: 1) Never use words with less than four syllables 
(consult SAT list for conversation possibilities) 

2) Make sure to mention how wonderful New York is. 

3) Above all, you have read "Bright lights. Big City". 

Mr. Morrow: 1) Tell him how wonderful Scadding's is and how 
much you wish you could switch houses. 

2) Make sure you mention how wonderful San Francisco is. 

3) Don't mention the Scadding's Prefect room. 

Mr. Miller: 1) Bring a good book. 
2) Bring a soft pillow. 

Mr. Mens: 1) Pretend you're really enthusiastic about the house 
and that you actually give a damn where the house places in the 
Prefect's cup. 

2) Be seen associating with the younger boys. 

3) Get your hair cut. 

Mr. Payne: 1) Ignore him. 

2) When he stops shouting at you say "Yes. sir" or "No, sir" or 

whatever seems appropriate at the time. 

Mr. Barber: 1) When you haven't not learned to not speak unlike 
none of the above don't talk to Nigel. 

2) Wear shades (dark ones). 

3) Sniff, go away. 

Mr. Fleming: 1) Cut out and use. 





Laddie, I will not be made fun of. 


A note is insisted upon by the powers that be. Therefore, get one 
of your friends to write you a note. Remember, he shouldn't sign it 
"Mommy" or "Mr. Augustinas" and a relative can only die once 
per year. 


If you happen to meet David walking through the halls, make sure 
you have your 3 Black Sabbath albums in one hand, a red 
pitchfork in the other, as 666 t-shirt on, and an upside-down 
crucifix hanging from your neck. 


(When one asks you to go to her formal) 
Be prepared to say: 

1) I think I'm going to Newfoundland 

2) My great aunt died in Kitchener and I have to go to her 

3) Sure I can go, but my girlfriend will only let me stay out 
until 9:30. 

4) Sorry, my parents are away, and I gotta make sure no one 
throws a party here. 





Featuring an interview between me and an anonymous English 
teacher who will only be referred to as REM. 

RICH: REM, we're interested in discussing the case of the 
anonymous student (pictured right), a former pupil of yours I 

REM: Weeell, you certainly get down to business right away. As 
you were saying, Billy... 

RICH: Dammit, he was suppose to be anonymous. Oh well, con- 
tinue, please. 

REM: Weeell, Billy had a simply wonderful idea for his indepen- 
dent study. He was going to write a series of plays examining 
human nature; it's passion, anger jealously, you know, the 
good stuff. 

RICH: And, what happened? 

REM: He just didn't finish in time. "Masterpieces can't be rushed." 
he said. "Ha!" I said. 

RICH: So? 

REM: So I failed him, of course. 

RICH: Of course. 

REM: Interestingly, the next year -his second attempt at the 
independent study- he teamed up with a boy called Dickens. 
Neither finished in time, and as I explained to Billy, two times zero 
still equals zero, you know. 

RICH: What happened to these boys? 

REM: They are excelling in one of the smaller universities. 

RICH: Thank you. 

REM: But, not at all. 



Deo^r Te^j 

Here \s <*\*\ i^dcpc/vAxx^V sr^cc^^\ o^VluAe. 
^^/\ X £>l<ip ^ue ces+ o^ ^m, PhcASic-s cA cesses r\ocj\ 

P^^osg : To Fire cc PUix&io^ -Ve^cUe^ 

^TgftlALS : TEX 




» 1 


k + clieU >*t 





,0^€.cK cxS\^ 



l\ v^'v vx ojorK. LA"^ V ecus* V Vue ^^P 
W c, co.recV-) WU.V w«We l*~r~< 
X£ m.o^ dwV le<*crv tW« r^^S ^© 



Instructions: Complete the following mental competitions. Write your answers down on paper and submit them to The College Times 
Office. ALL absolutely correct answers will win $50. Contest ends August 31, 1986. 

Competition No. 1: Remember Sesame Street? Well, this is the same idea. One of these pictures is not like the other, one of them 
doesn't belong. If you can spot which picture is of a commando, you'll have won our game. 

Dear Editors, 

In my opinion the commando is 

(a) Really the College Times editor who is cooking up something positively evil. 

(b) The guy who has the cooking staff thinking (because all the food is eaten at lunch) that the students like the meals. 

(c) In Vietnam, fighting Chuck Norris. 

(d) the blond-haired guy in that fashionable rebel-army look (green jacket and matching trousers). 

(e) Izzy, of the G.I. Joe real American hero squad. 

(f) All of them, as this is actually Delta Force, in which each member is a specifically trained killer who could probably exterminate you with 
only a butter knife. 

Competition No. 2: Beneath are two pictures; a before and after of the SAME person. Your objective is to write a small paragraph on 
what happened in between. While writing, keep in mind the following: Colin Lowndes. 



By Kent Jarvis 

How Teachers Avoid Marking Essays 
30 PRINT "SANDERS. 97%" 
40 ELSE 

60 65 AND 85 

90 STOP 

Todd Christie also did a lot of work and produced a two page, 
eight picture take-off on Ripley's "BELIEVE IT OR NOT'. We 
thought the funniest part was the bill he gave the College 
Times afterwards. 




n'-.-iTH- :-:'=> 











The second funniest part were these two clips: 

Ted Charlton has been known to skip up to 24 consecutive 
days of school and still pass tests!! 

Believe it or not! 

Deep down, 

Andy "Barney" Houghton truly 

digs calculus!! 

Believe it or not! 



Stan's entry was a late winner of the humour prize as it was 'accidentally' mixed in 
with the poetry section. 

In Ages Past; 

by Chris Stanley 

The first to sail the seven seas 

Had water up to each's knees; 

But then there came the ships of steel 

That always kept an even keel. 

And then when Parsons came of age 

His turbines were the latest rage. 

The ships, they grew from year to year 

As did their price, so very dear. 

And many of them came to rest 

As Neptune's everlasting guest. 

Their names, like Lusitania, 

The Queens, and Berengaria, 

Live on in books of history- 

And some in books of mystery! 

In Ages Past; 

A Present Day Prophecy 

by Graham Sanders 

'In Ages Past' by the yet unknown poet (but soon to be a 
household word- like toaster or chair) Chris Stanley, is truly an 
ecletric masterpiece. Stanley (Stan-the-man as he is known among 
his poet friends) weaves a work which combines richly textured 
classical references with a child-like simplicity that's refreshing in 
this oh, so complex modem world. Witness the fact that the poem 
can even be understood by a seven year-old. It so happens that 
Stan has quite a large following in this age group. 

Some of the subtler poetic techniques would be lost on the pre- 
pubescent crowd, however. Stan manages to uphold an iambic 
quadrameter throughout the piece. And combining this meter with 
a strict rhyming couplet scheme, he demonstrates his toehold in 
classical literature. 

Some critics may think Stan strains his meter and rhyming 
scheme somewhat, as in "Had water up to each's knees". What they 
fail to see is that Stan's structure is intentional. The peculiarity of the 
syntax demonstrated such as "each's knees" reinforces the 
singularity of and increases our sympathy for those wretched wet- 
kneed sailors. 

Stan whisks us through the age of steel and steam in four concise 
lines. He offsets the words "steel" and "kneel" and "age" and "rage". 
In these four words Stan interweaves a structural, a temporal, and 
an emotional motif with incredible finesse. He also addresses the 

economic concerns of shipping as inflation caused their prices to 
become "so very dear". 

After lulling us into historoeconomical motif, Stan hits us over the 
head with a death image that has the impact of a two-ton rubber 
mallet. His use of the metaphor "Neptune's everlasting guest" 
shows his acute interest in Greco/Roman mythology. His classical 
references followed by an obviously well-researched list of sunken 
ships (what was the Berengaria? He's got me stumped.) is a bit 
flashy for Stan's usual sublimely banal style. But every poet should 
be allowed his excesses from time to time. 

The last two lines are a typically Stanlean finish; simple on the 
surface but inherently complex. He states that these ships will live 
on in "books of history" and "books of mystery". But by writing this 
poem Stan has ensured that they will also survive in books of poet- 
ry, he has added a third unwritten line to his already accomplished 
rhyming couplet; an ingenious twist on a traditional form. And what 
does Stan mean, "in books of mystery"? He has cast an ominous 
light over the rest of the poem. Perhaps the Lusitania was 
sabotaged, not torpedoed as everyone thought? Did the Berengaria 
really exist, or is he just a pitcher for the San Francisco Giants? To 
find out how Stan resolves these perplexing questions look out for 
his latest collection: "All The Answers, or Most of them Anyway", 
coming to a bookmobile near you. 


■3 Pv 








by Andrew Heintzman 

Starting Monday morning April 28 in prayers and ending with 
the Jam on Saturday Night, this year's Arts Festival once again 
demonstrated the incredible artistic abilities which reside within 
the U.C.C. student body. Throughout the year athletes are rightly 
recognized for their considerable achievements. However, the 
Arts Festival provides an excellent opportunity for students 
interested in the arts to shine, and it seems to me that this is very 

The Arts Festival got off to a great start with a piano solo 
performed by Colin Furness in prayers on Monday. The week to 
follow was packed full of events such as noon hour recitals, artistic 
displays, and an impromptu speaking contest, to name just a few. 
Well over one hundred boys were involved in various capacities, 
and large, enthusiastic audiences made their efforts well worth 

The Friday night show was a great success. Organized by James 
Ramsey and Mr. Illidge, it consisted of a number of short plays put 
on by the school's junior and senior theatre workshops. The night 
was filled with well performed sketches in both humourous and 
serious veins, and the intensity with which the actors carried out 
their roles was remarkable. This year drama night was held in the 



lecture theatre, and this facilitated excellent interplay between the 
actors and their audience. The move from a perenially half filled 
Laidlaw Hall to the lecture theatre was an intelligent one, and 
James and Mr. Illidge should be congratulated for the evening's 

Blue Night was held for the second time this year, and took 
place in the Upper Dining Hall on Wednesday Night. Organized 
by Iain MacKinnon, both the Upper School and the Prep put their 
best jazz foot forward, entertaining an audience with music 
ranging from swing to modem jazz. 

The Jam was a smaller, more contained event than in previous 
years, but this turned out to be an advantage instead of a 
hindrance. A good crowd turned out to listen to some of the best 
Rock-and-Roll that U.C.C. has turned out to date. The tight and 
well controlled show proved to reaffirm the fact that it is possible 
to run a solid, well attended Rock-and-Roll show on school 
grounds without jeapordizing the school's policies on drugs and 

I would like to thank the many people who helped run this 
year's Arts Festival, particularly Mark Hyland and Bill Chalmers. 





by Colin Furness 

The UCC Music Program continues to flourish after some 
important faculty changes this year. Mr. Robert Mee returned 
from a one year sabbatical spent in the Eastman Music School 
Doctoral Program, and Mr. Brian Crone joined us, taking over 
from Mr. Loach who we lost at the end of last year. 

It is apparent that our Music Program has continued to improve 
each year without exception. But this year, the jump in calibre was 
simply astounding. The two senior ensembles, the Symphonic 
Band and the Jazz Ensemble, tackled a great deal of difficult 
music, creating in the process an immensely varied repertoire that 
never ceased to challenge even the first chair and lead players. 
They performed in a number of concerts throughout the year, 
notably in the Independent Schools' Music Festival in April, where 
UCC musicians filled many of the key positions. The junior groups 
also must not be overlooked. Both the Concert Band and the 
Stage Band provide ample evidence that budding young 
musicians are by no means in short supply. 

One of the great recent innovations to the extra-curricular 
music scene was the introduction last year of the fledgling String 
Ensemble. Under the careful guidance of Mrs. Goldberg, this 
group improved at a rapid rate and astounded its audience in a 
recent recital in prayers by producing a warm, beautiful sound 
usually associated with a much older group. 

The Choral program continues under the direction of Mr. Ian 
Sadler, who has worked extremely hard to popularize and expand a 
program which without his efforts would likely not even exist. 

The pit band for the Little Theatre's winter production of West 
Side Story was simply beyond comparison. Although the score 
ranks among the most difficult in the Broadway repertoire, and 
was without a doubt the toughest music ever attempted by a UCC 
group, the twenty musicians under the intrepid Mr. Crone rose 
beyond all expectations to produce a sound that was virtually 

But the most impressive accomplishment of the Music 
Department HAD to be our ninth annual Music Night held in 
honour of Mr. Richard Howard, in Roy Thomson Hall on May 20. 
It is simply not possible to realize the amount of hard work on 
everybody's part - especially Mr. Mee - to make the event a 
smashing success, not to mention a historic first. 

Playing in Roy Thompson Hall seemed a fitting place for our 
final concert - this has been the best year yet for UCC music, which 
says a great deal for the dedication of its members, not to mention 
the hard work and forbearance of Messrs. Mee and Crone, to 
whom we owe our sincerest thanks. Good Luck next year! 
P.S. Trombone IS God's instrument. 




by John Viljoen 

This year has undoubtedly been a hallmark for the Service Fund 
Committee. Under the guidance of Mme. Lowndes we have 
managed to surpass most previous standards of achievement and 
capital raised. 

Our various activities were as follows: 

First term - House Donations, Grub Day and the 

Chum/City Christmas Wish. 

Second Term - Stop 101 Food Drive and Nepal 

School Clothes Drive. 

Third Term - The Infamous Banana Eating Contest, 

this year won by David Fruitman in a time of 45 

seconds!, and the Camp Awaking Raffle. 

Perhaps the most innovative feature of the committee this year 
was that we did not concentrate so much on the money aspect of 
the donations, but also in supplying the necessary goods for the 
needy. Thanks to the committees efforts and the school's con- 
tributions there were a few happier kids at Christmas, a few less 
hungry people and a very lucky bunch of special campers who 
might not have otherwise had a summer camp opportunity. 

Special thanks go to Mme. Lowndes who not only orchestrated 
the whole affair but who also maintained a happy disposition at 
some of our less formal meetings. Also to Colin Ground, who really 
was the main factor influencing this year's success; we couldn't have 
done it without you Colin. And finally to the committee itself - a 
really super bunch of guys who gave every activity their utmost 
effort. This has been a very successful year and a pleasing one for me 
personally. Thanks all, you are absolutely outstanding individuals. 



by Colin Furness and Craig Offman 

It seems hardly necessary to expound upon the many virtues 
inherent in debating. Arguing successfully with one's parents is, 
after all, only one aspect of an art that proves itself useful every time 
you open your mouth to speak. Uh yes. 

Again this year under the auspices of Mr. Fleming, our coach, we 
managed to uphold the UCC tradition of strong debating, which is 
best exemplified by our results in a number of tournaments over the 
year. It is often only possible to send two or three students to any 
single tournament, and this creates some obvious difficulties. A 
great deal of thought was needed to create a precarious balance 
between sending veteran seniors to do well, and less experienced 
ones to learn from exposure. We tried our best to avoid the pitfall of 
concentrating too much on a few of today's seniors at the expense 
of tomorrow's, as this has occasionally been the tendency in the 
past. At any rate, there is just cause for optimism. There would 
appear to be a knot of promising debaters in every grade right on 
down, and there has been a great deal of junior talent displayed. 

Mediocrity in any activity is often diplomatically referred to as a 
"year of building." Fortunately we did not have to resort to that. The 
seniors put forth a sustained effort which brought home an 
impressive string of victories, most notably the Fulford Cup trophy 
for the first time since 1983. In addition to placing first overall, we 
also won two of the three rounds. In round I, Colin Furness in his 
first Fulford, won best speaker. In round II, Chris "Woody Wood- 
pecker" Carnegie finished second, Raj Pasricha third, and Rob 
Steiner fifth. The juniors also produced excellent results, most 
notably by Greg Eckler, John Pottow, and Satish Raj. 

There were, of course, a host of other impressive performances. 
Craig Offman won the St. Georges Challenge Saucer, and as a 
result advanced to a tournament sponsored by the Ishmaili 

Students, where competing against debaters from around Ontario, 
he was a member of the winning team. The school was also well 
represented at the Regionals by Jasper Malcomson, who together 
with Scott Bailey and Chris Carnegie, formed the backbone of our 
Grade ll's. 

Mr. Webb, our 'mentor emeritus', is owed our sincerest thanks for 
his assistance through the year, which often proved to be invalu- 
able. Both he and Mr. Fleming deserve credit for their support and 
hard work, especially at our own impromptu tournament held May 1 0. 
The only thing left to do is to wish good luck next year to the 
debaters who remain. Remember, it doesn't matter at all how 
chaotic things get, just so long as nobody else realizes it. Thank-you, 
Mr. Speaker. 


by Rob Steiner 

The World Affairs Conference, or WAC as it is affectionately 
known, was an incredible success this year. As early as November 
(WAC was in February in case you were sick that day) the commit- 
tee had received almost 1,000 applications from schools across 

Eastern Canada and the Midwest United States. In the end more 
than a thousand people attended; almost giving Mr. Sadlier a heart 
attack. The speakers included: Canada's ambassador to the UN, 
Stephen Lewis, the American ambassador to Canada, Thomas 
Niles, the leader of Canada's peace movement, James Stark, and 
such other people as Knowlton Nash and Ann Medina. Students 
engaged themselves in discussion on subjects ranging from free 
trade to apartheid to the Palestinian problem, while having the 
chance to hear from real leaders in those fields. This year, more 
than ever, WAC was the work and the success of students, although 
the devotion of Mr. Bennett must be noted and commended. Ira 
Nishisato, acting for the last time as Chairman, coordinated an 
excellent team and succeeded in planning what has become 
recognized as the largest Conference of its kind in Canada. Next 
year's Conference should be a great success as well and will be 
planned for the first time in cooperation with the Geography 
department. Thanks to all those who helped this year and best of 
luck to next year's inheritors. 



iV ' 

by Dr. Moore 

Upper Canada College is rightly proud of 
the variety of extracurricular activities avail- 
able to its students, and the Clubs pro- 
gramme this year has made an important 
contribution to this part of school life. 

About twenty groups have met regularly 
during the year with the result that many 
boys have developed interests and skills in 
activities ranging from photography to 
SCUBA or from bridge to first aid. An 
important point, often overlooked about 
such interests, is that they can be life-long 
ones: the foundation of enduring hobbies. 

In the brief space available it is impossible 
to refer to all activities. Here, then, are a 

Cycling has been the new activity, with a 
small group of enthusiasts demonstrating, 
among other things, what special features 
to look for when buying a bicycle, or how to 
train using rollers. Several local rides have 
been taken, and the way this group has 
developed is a good example of the 
importance of enthusiastic leadership in 
the success of a club. 

Cookery has continued to be popular in 
its second year and many boys have 


produced dishes of a variety and quality 
they would have thought impossible one 
year ago. 

The Inside Out Club has provided a wide 
range of interesting and often controversial 
forums, held in an overflowing room 211. 
The highlight of this year, though, was the 
World Affairs Conference held in February 
which featured Stephen Lewis as its key- 
note speaker, and had a record attendance. 

Bridge Club has probably never been 
stronger and tounaments have been held 
with Appleby, and some players have taken 
part in public tournaments in Toronto. 

A "side effect" of the clubs programme is 
the renewed interest in the Duke Of 
Edinburgh's Award scheme. Participation 
in some clubs, such as Interact, meets the 
requirements or certain parts of that 
scheme, and many boys are involved in 
this way. 

It would seem appropriate to end this 
brief account with a thank you to the many 
staff whose hard work makes the whole 
programme possible; so to them, many 




by Colin Furness 

Try to envisage a knot of 12 terrified members from the cast and 
crew of West Side Story, wandering timidly one night through Lon- 
don's seediest district, pretending not to be tourists. If you can do 
that, you might even have an inkling of what a terrific time was had 
by the members of the Little Theatre's March Break field trip to Lon- 
don, England. 

Why London, you ask? Well, fortunately Mr. Lowndes had the 
foresight to recognize the need for a restful vacation after enduring 
the hardships of mounting a musical of such incredible complexity, 
naturally, theatre being of common interest to us all, it is no coin- 
cidence that we headed for a city that plays host to some of the 
finest productions in the world. 

The half dozen or so shows that we managed to take in during 
our one week stay in England ranged from the serious to the comic, 
form the conservative to the bizarre, from the tangible to the obli- 
que. Our only restriction in what we could see inevitably had to 
be time. 

Apart from the theatres, an assortment of museums, art galleries, 
and various tourist attractions was also on our hit list. In addition, a 
great deal of time was simply spent exploring the environs. In a city 
as vibrant as London, we never seemed to have a single dull 
moment. Even something as supposedly uneventful as a stroll 
through Westminister Abbey yielded a passing encounter with the 
Archbishop of Canterbury. 

Mr. and Mrs. Lowndes were not the only faculty members to risk 
vacationing with us. They were joined by Mr. Morrow, Mr. Slemon, 
and Mr. Adams, all of whom are owed our sincerest thanks for put- 
ting up with us. 

Quite apart from the fact that it did not rain once, the trip was a 
tremendous success, as we accomplished all we had set out to do: 
relax, recuperate, and absorb some culture in the process. 


by Jeff Bryce 

Why would a group of twenty-four students, fatigued by the Feb- 
ruary Blahs, want to spend their March break in the Soviet Union? 
The initial responses varied from, "I don't know, my parents are 
sending me!" to a more decisive delve into Russian culture and 
find out if 'they' are really that different." 

With little knowledge of what to expect, we left capitalism (or so 
we thought) and journeyed to 'the motherland'. Each of the five 
republics we visited provided us with a diverse cross-section of the 
Soviet peoples and their ways of life. Of course there was always 
Lenin Square, the propaganda in the streets and some other 
apparent Russian influence, but it never outweighed the sparkling 
personality of every republic. 

From the very Russian Moscow in the north, to the more primi- 
tive Soviet Asian Samarkand in the south; from Erevan in the 
Cuacascian mountain range to the Georgian capital of Tblisi, and 
then back north to the glorified military city of Volgograd and the 
glittering glamour of Leningrad, we toured everything from Art and 
Military museums to Buiczkas and Babushkas. 

As a whole, the group fit well together under the guidance of Mr. 
Webb and Mr. Turner; many new relationships were formed. We 
owe sincere thanks to Stanoslav, our Intourist guide, who was 
always prompt and reliable. He not only made it possible for us to 
get better acquainted with the USSR, but revealed to us the classic 
patriotism and peaceful nature of the Russian people with his 
emotions and philosophies. 

We will always remember Bob and Doug and how Canadians 
can have fun too, 'eh', in the Soviet Union. There are, of course, 
oodles of propaganda posters stoned away somewhere in the 
boarding house and Guy Coultman's room is enough to make even 
Lenin roll over in his tomb. 

It is funny now that anyone should ask why we went. Rather, they 
should consider when they are going to plan an excursion to the 
USSR. (Even the city tour is worth it.) They should go and dwindle 
away some of that arrogant Western bias before it is too late. 


by Micheal Hill 

This past March, both the First Cricket and First Tennis teams 
embarked on a tour of New Zealand. We arrived on a bright, sunny 
day and were greeted by wonderful New Zealand hospitality. This 
pattern continued, as wherever we went we were treated 

On the field the natives were less repectful, as First Cricket lost six 
of their seven matches, the best result being a rain induced draw. 

The tennis team fared considerably better, winning all except their 
first match. They wrote this loss off conveniently to jet lag. 

The major part of the trip however, was the touring. From the top 
of Mt. Cook on the Tasman Glacier, to Whitewater rafting on the 
Shotover River, to Fergie's in Christchurch, we had a fabulous time. 
This was an experience of a lifetime. 






From left to right: J. Ramsay, C. Bryce, A. 
Baldachin, Mr. M. Webb, A. Kindbom 

After a year of tough indoctrination to the perennial powerhouse 
known as Jackson's, the moment has come to display the true 
strengths of a J-Man. The final test will uncover the intangibles that 
are rarely appreciated by the "average" housemaster. The spirit 
around the lockers, the Slamma-Jamma antics of the courts, and 
the killer instincts of the diamond engulfed anyone willing to 
embrace them. In Jacksons everyone did. Thanks to all: Mr. Webb, 
students, Moatheads, athletes, club-addicts, & prefects. 

We made the powerhouse roll! 

Jacksons Final Exam: 

1. The Jackson's grade thirteens must be thanked because: 

a) They alleviated the problem of overcrowding in prayers? 

b) They displayed cohesion and spirit? 

c) They proved the cliche, "Nobody's perfect"? 

d) Uhm? 

2. Who is going to win the Prefect's Cup? 

a) Jacksons 

b) Jacksons 

c) Jacksons 

d) Jacksons 

3. Which of the following represents the smallest number? 

a) The combined number of clubs the grade nines attended? 

b) Medline's shoesize? 

c) Jackson's overall average? 

d) The number of gatings Mr. Webb has given out? 

4. "Robinson Crusoe was the only one who had work done by 

Friday." Discuss how this relates to Jackson's. 

5. How many Froms are there? 

a) More than five? 

b) What is a From? 

c) Only one. Get contacts! 

d) all of the above. 

6. The Jackson's attendance list always displayed a few absences 

a) Billy-Bob and Ross didn't know where the prayer hall was? 
(Still don't) 

b) Billy-Bob and Ross thought house meetings were at 

c) Billy-Bob and Ross were in fact in prayers... They sat in the 
masters row. 

d) They were playing the organ? 

7. Jacksons can be summarized by the following quotation: 

a) "After us, the deluge." Louis XVI 

b) "Nuts." General MacAuliffe 

c) "Winning isn't everything, but it sure beats anything that 
comes second." Coach Bryant. 

d) "An honest Pop makes good friends." John Molson 




- 81-'86 

Some men see things as they are and ask why 
1 dream things that never were and ask why not 

— R.F Kennedy 

Gndiron Ball-Coach D.H. B&C. Hoop. "YAKE", Mntrl '84. 
Down South Jukin' -NYC 85 B&BB. 0-44&28-27. nocturnal 
caffeine filled roustabout, rambler, "Moathead" crew. '84 
Champ Blue Cow. "By. Nc" "Mr Breeze".. JA No.l. 

I got that green light I got 

To be movin' on 

Lynyrd Skynyrd 



A man must have a certain amount of intelligent ignorance to 
get anywhere 

— Charles Kettering 

Never let your schooling interfere with your education 

— G B. Shaw 

It wasn't the work that was hard, it was finding the energy to do 
it that I found tough. 

— N. M Brunelle 

ffx) = lim f(x+h)-f{x) 
h-»0 h 


A day of dappled seaborne douds — J Joyce 

Ufe is not a series of lamps symmetncally arranged, life is a 
luminous halo. — V Woolf 

The way is to the destructive element submit yourself, and with 
the exertions of your hands and feet in the water make the 
deep, deep sea keep you up — J Conrad 

I don't want to be a Messiah. I just want to have fun. 

- MW.H 

Thanks M&P&B&D Form 3 Survivor 

Look, there's Beaker 1 

To my pals m the B Club thanks for the support and good 



The negros in the forest brightly feathered 
They are saying forget the night and live 
with us in forests of azure out here in 
the perimeter there are no stars out 
here we is stoned immaculate 






There has got to be an invisible sun — The Police 

My Hovercraft is full of eels 1 — Monty Python 

Zappa's Law There are two things on earth that are universal 
hydrogen and stupidity 

Who knows who's right 

No subtitute you're born you're dead — Yes 

Fahenstock's Rule for Failure If at first you don't succeed, des- 
troy all evidence that you tried 
Ticking away the moments that make up a dull day 
You fritter and waste the hours in an off hand way 

— Pink Floyd 

What is supply-side economics 9 


1st Swim Team 

Ktlgore Trout 

Bob Dylan 

O. there has been much throwing about of brains 

— W Shakespeare 

Forsam et haec olim meminisse iuvabit 






Sun's up, looks okay, 

the world survives into another day 

and I'm thinking about eternity 

some kind of ecstasy got a hold on me 


1st Soccer 
1st Cricket 
New Zealand Tour 1986 

— Bruce Cockburn 

Symphonic Band 
West Side Story 


U-16 FOOTBALL '81. '82 
2nd SWIM TEAM '81. '82 
U-lb RUGBY '82 
1st SWIM TEAM '84 
1st FOOTBALL '83. '84 

ASTRO '83 

'81 -'86 




— AD '86 












The story of life is quicker than the wink of an eye. 

- Jimi hendrix (C B '84) 
I never said all those things I said 

— Yogi Berra 
I don't want to tell you that you're not doing your job. but you're 
not doing your job 

— MHW to Jackson's stewards and AGB to everyone on the 
CT staff 

Thanks to my parents, whose generosity knew no bounds in 
letting me take the subway anytime I wanted 

Austna 85 - 1SFT Jackson's House Baseball 

Bio 13 1986 - Survivor Jackson's House Soccer 

College Times '85-'86 Rotisserrie '85-"86 


In one way it seems like 
yesterday. In another it seems 
like forever 


One is never too old to learn 
from a master 

Ave UCC Lucratori Te Salutant' 
1st Hockey '85-'86 
J-man Moat Head '81 -'86 

- Charlie Daniels Band 

- Mr Kidd 

Thanks Mom & Dad 


- 81-'86 

It is not hard to live through a day, 

if you can live through a moment What 

creates despair is the imagination, that pretends 

there is a future, and insists on predicting 

millions of moments, thousands of days, and so 

drains you that you cannot live the moment at hand 

— Andre Dubus 

Having just the vision's no solution. 
Everything depends on execution. 
Putting it together. 
That's what counts. 

— Stephen Sondheim 



l r> 


From left to right: N Hira, Mr R 
Kuzniak, Mr. K. Fleming, D. Kahn, K. 

It's been a roller coaster year, so far, for the Bremner's machine. 
Interest was good in the first term but flagged in the second, with the 
notable exception of the Science Olympics. 

Although Bremner's is not the most athletic of Houses, it is 
certainly the brightest. Indeed, it leads the school in over-all average 
in four out of five grades. This is why the House did so well in 
"Reach For the Top" and other scientific competitions, and why it 
will continue to be dominating force in the Science Olympics 
competition for years to come. Incidentally Bremner's has won that 
competition for the past two years. 

As far as the athletic side of things, it must be said that Bremner's 
is not a garden of exceptional talent. It's true that there are a few 
very good athletes in the House, but there is a much larger number 
that don't seem to care for sports a great deal. The goal for 
Bremner's in the future has to be to get those people more involved, 
and I'm fully confident that goal can be achieved. 




If manliness were next to godliness I'd be like pretty godly 
—Big Bobby R (On what it is to be a man) 

Eeeessentially speaking the physicality of the situation is quite 
absolutely. — Barney H (On the human condition) 

As it says in this book I've been reading about drugs and 
individual freedom in the 1960's 

— The Aug (On any subject) 

(CENSOR) 'n ah like, 1 don't see why a guy shouldn't use 
words like (CENSOR) I mean, like What the (CENSOR) 
ya know' — Todd C (On profanity) 

First Football '84-'86 
Symphonic Band "85-'86 
Weather Beater '82-"86 

Nose Theorem Denved Eco'85 

PS Dom, seek help 



An intelligent mind is receptive ot new ideas; indeed, it seeks 
knowledge. — Prov 18:15 

The best answer to 'why' is "why not'. — J H.M 

The Spirit produces love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, 
faithfulness, humility and self-control. — Gal 5 22 

A single death is a tragedy; a million deaths is sadly only a 
statistic — Anon 

In 19-, Ottawa set up a $10 million commission to investigate 
government overspending!! — Stats Canada 

I/O Club; SOMA; WAC *85-'86, Track Team '84-'86; 
Geo & Ottawa '85; Washington '86; 
House Soccer ■ Next year guys! BREM 
My name is Jonathan, but never mind 

For me. life is a tragedy when I feel, and a comedy when I 


It is because other people are less than normal that they think I 

am eccentric 

I am full of ideas but I haven't the dnving force and energy to 

execute them One has to fight so much for every little thing I 

was bom bone lazy — Indira Gandhi 

One who goes out in search of knowledge is on the path of God 

until he returns 

Struggle is the meaning of life, defeat or victory is in the Hands 

of God but struggle itself is a man's duty and should be his 


Thanks Mom and Dad 

1st Cricket '85- '86 
House Soccer '84-'86 
Alchemist Research Group 
Top Down 

New Zealand Cncket Tour 

Symphonic Band '85-'86 

Dave Slemon Fan Club 



There's so many different worlds 
So many different suns 
And we have just one world 

But we live in different ones. 

77- - 86 

Dire Straits 

I've seen a lot of things 

But I have not seen a lot of other things 

— John Cougar Mellencamp 
See the ball you stnde, 
Let it go if it's outside, 
If it's a curve, it should bread down, 
So jack up and take it downtown — Joe Morgan 

Let me bid you farewell 

GEO '85, Washington '86. Out of the Blue, 
Drive of '85' Bru-u-u-ce' Rotissemed '85-'86' 

Dire Straits 


Education is what survives when what one has learned has 
been forgotten — B.F Skinner 

Mind- a mysterious form of matter secreted by the brain Its 
chief activity consists in the endeavour to ascertain its own 
nature, the futility of the attempt being due to the fact that it has 
nothing but itself to know itself with — Ambrose Bierce 

For decades in my lifetime nothing has succedded like 
failure — Brother Theodore 

Polhaus It's heavy What is it? 

Slade The. er, stuff that dreams are made of 

— The Maltese Falcon 

Boy 1 Do I feel like a weenie' 9 

Why worry 7 

Late Night '82-'86 

David Letterman 
— Dire Straits 

The Neighborhood 


Who is John Gait 7 

- Ayn Rand 

Deep in the human unconscious is a pervasive need for a logi- 
cal universe That makes sense But the real universe is always 
one step beyond logic 

— Muad' Dib 

Hubba-Hubba 1 Anarchists rule! 

God isn't dead he just doesn't give a f--- 1 



I know what you're saying. I have no idea what it means. 

— Herbert R Tarlek Jr 

This next one is dedicated to the girl in the third row with the 
yellow underwear 

— Jimi Hednx 


Rugby. First Soccer. LAB A T Y D 


David's biological clock foils him again 




And so farewell from your little droog And to all others in this 
story profound shooms of hp-music brmr And they can kiss 
my shames But you. my brothers, remember sometimes thy 
little Alex that was Amen And all that cal 

— A Clockwork Orange 

You are either on the bus, or you are off the bus 

— Den Desey to the Merry Pranksters 

Every saint has a past and every sinner has a future 

— Oscar Wilde 

Much love and gratitude goes to my parents for putting up 

with me 



I'm going to 

Sing my song 

I'm going to ramble 



1 held the blade in trembling hands 

Prepared to make it. but just then the phone rang 

— Roger Waters 
The traffic lights 
They turn blue tommorrow. — Jimi Hendrix 

And I wonder 
Still I wonder 

First Soccer, Nice '85 

Geo '85. Volare Master (Blood) 




There I was. catching rays under the Bohemian sun, listening 
to Style Council While sipping on my milk on the rocks, stroll- 
ing down the path I chanced upon several wonky yet wise look- 
ing men Seeking enlightenment. I asked. "O great venerable 
masters, what is the meaning of life?" 
Man in J-cloth with receeding hairline 

"Heineken with tunes " Tall guy with funny glasses "Sex dans 
le backseat dune Camaro Blanche " Dude with deadly shades: 
"B D - Bob Dylan. Bo Diddly and Bo Derek " Skinny guy hum- 
ming Neil Young: "Nirvana is skiing with a buz on a staarry 
night " Jolly Giant with intimidating haircut: "BJ r Short Man 
with C tattooed on his chest "Pink Floyd after several J's. 
man " 

Thanks Mom & Dad for everything 
Squash. Skiing First Tanning Team '85-'86 


I know you think that I'm the devil 

We're the last in line. 

We're just not sure. 

At this stage profundity alludes me 


— Anonymous 
— Dlo 

Little Theatre '82-'85. Second Rugby 84 
Ship Wrecked '84. ROAD Trip March '85. 
Snow Job March '86. GEO '85. Elliot Lake and Beyond 



From left to right: I. Dalglish, G. Sigel, 

C. Lam, 1. MacKinnon, T. Farrow, N. 

Breyfogle, G. Powis, C. Ground, C. 

Adams, A. Milne. 

Absent: M. Hill, Mr. R. Hood, Mr. M. 


Due to a summer wedding and the start of a new life with C.L., 
Howard's lost a longtime upstanding member in Mrs. Lowndes. But 
we also gained an enthusiastic new associate housemaster in Mr. 

By the end of the House Soccer season Howard's had achieved 
good team work, however it was too late in coming and we missed 
the playoffs. House Ultimate is a good sport in which Howard's still 
maintains great strength, and we finished third in it this year. The 
surprise of the year was the victory for Howard's in Junior House 
Basketball, which led to in capturing the overall title. All other 
House Sports saw excellent turnouts from all the students. 

At the end of the winter term we had pulled out of the basement 
in the Prefect's Cup standings, and stood comfortably in sixth place. 
This placing certainly gave the House a feeling of accomplishment, 
after finishing near the basement for the last three years. 

We would like to thank "Pizza-Pizza" for their kind gift of free 
pizzas, which didn't arrive within the thirty-three minute time limit 
on House Pizza night. 

Howard's gained fame this year for its open door policy with 
regards to the Prefect's room, which soon became known as the 
"Level 42 room". 

Credit must be given to all the grade thirteens in the House as this 
was the first year without prefects, an experiment which seemed to 
work well. Thanks also to all the Howardites for their spirit and 
participation, and to Mr. Hood. 

Good Luck in the future. 






A squid eating dough in a polyethylene bag is fast and bulbous 

Got me 7 — Captain Beetheart 

And Morality is nothing if it is merely a form of good 

behaviour — Lawrence Durell 

Today is an important occasion — David Byrne 

However since it is 

New Year's eve 

and I have Lip Cancer 

I will place my 

Paper hat on my 

Concussion and dance 

Might as well plant an oak in a flower pot. and expect it to 

thrive — Emily Bronte 

Brew Ball 1 985-86 GEO 86 MUCKY DUCK 



There are 2 tragedies in life: one is to lose your heart's desire. 
the other is to gain it — Shaw 

Pleasure is a sin and sometimes sin is a pleasure. 

— Lord Byron 
Love and do what you will. — St, Augustine 

If 1 appear to be carefree it's only to camouflage my 
sadness — The English Beat 

This is stranger than I thought, six different ways inside my 
heart, and everyone I'll keep tonight, six different ways go deep 
inside. — The Cure 

Beaner Club Bahamas '85 Loons '84-'86 

Thanks Mom, Dad for everything. Good luck, Peter Loving 
Always Remembering Always Wittaker fondest memories of 
Andrew Drillis who passed away at 17 in the summer of "85 He 
still lives in our hearts and always will 




So where does the power come from to see the race to the end 7 
It comes from within 

— Eric Liddell, Chanots of Fire 

It has always seemed strange to me The things we admire in 
men, kindness and generosity, openness, honesty, understand- 
ing and feeling are the concomitants of failure in our system 
And those traits of success And while men admire the quality 
of the first they love the produce of the second 

— John Steinbeck Cannery Row 

This is what we've all been waiting for ! walk out the door 
Inside I feel a smile 

— Ken Dryden, The Game 

Thanks Mom, Dad and Carter 




There is no duty we so much underrate 
As the duty o( being happy 








'82- - 86 



Don't play the game of time 

Things that happened in the past, 

Only happened in your mind ... 

So, forget your mind 

And you'll be free — David Jones 

We are bom without eyesight 

We are born without sin. — David Byrne 

There are times when all the world's asleep, 
the questions run too deep 
for such a simple man 

Won't you please, please tell me what we've learned 
1 know it sounds absurd 
but please tell me who I am. 

— Rick Davies & Roger Hodgson 
Todah rabah le mishpacha ve le chaverim shelli! 

Luck is a thing that comes in many forms and who can 
recognize her. — Emest Hemmingway 

Capitalism is a system under which man exploits man Under 
communism, it's the other way around — U Thant 

For there is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it 
so — William Shakespeare 

Hey, you weren't here a minute ago — D A R W 

Heheheheheheheheheh' — DK.L.K. 

But all this talk is only poetry Only as true as we would believe 
We must leam to fight the negative, not to court the self in 
defeat. - H J 

Austria, France '85/U S.SR '86 

Rugby '82-'86 "Top down" '85-'86 

NO MORE DOUGHHEADS"""//Hit jt , Gary! 

No one can do his best unless asked to do more than he can do 
easily — Anon 

Ehn 1 -JM 

What you think of yourself matters more than what others think 
of you — Anon 

I'll ask Mr Allen and tell you tomorrow — D S 

Mathematics is an art. not a science —AN 

Never let your schooling interfere with your education 

— G.BS 

Why stand up if you can sit down' J And why sit down if you can 
lie down. — R F 






We must sail sometimes with the wind and sometimes against it 
• but we must sail, and not drift, nor lie at anchor. 

— Oliver Wendell Holmes 

If at first you don't succeed try again then quit There's no 
point in being a damn fool about it 

- W C Fields 

Doc'. Bags' Dogie' Deeker' Tod' Who am I? 

Thanks Mom & Dad and everyone else for a great time 

NICE 1 st HOCKEY '85 Geo '85 




I know a man whose brains are small, 

He could't think of nothin' at all 

Not the same as you and me, 

He doesn't take poetry 

He's so unhip. when you say Dylan, he thinks 

your talking about Dylan Thomas, whoever he was 

The man ain't got no culture 

but it's all right Ma. everybody loves to get 

stoned — Simon & Garfunkel 

And after all, we're only ordinary men 
Jeremiah was a bullfrog 

- RW 
Three Dog Night 

1st Soccer 

Thanks MDPK & ALL 

1st Cncket 
New Zealand Tour '86 



To the hipster. Bird was a living justification of their philosophy 
The hipster is an underground man He is to the second World 
War what the dadaist was to the first He is amoral, anarchistic, 
gentle, and overcivilized to the point of decadence He is 
always ten steps ahead of the game because of his awareness, 
an example of which would be meeting a girl and rejecting her. 
because he knows they will date, hold hands, kiss, neck, pet 
fornicate, perhaps marry, divorce-so why start the whole thing? 
He knows the hypocrisy of bureaucracy, the hatred implicit in 
reliyion - so what values are left for him'- -except to go through 
life avoiding pain, keep his emotions in check, and after that, 
"be cool." and look for kicks He is looking for something that 
transcends all this bullshit and finds it in jazz 

— A jazz critc 
1 wish I was blacker than you." 

— Bud Powell to Miles Davis 




Silver scales flash bright and fade 

in reeds along the shore 

like a pearl in a sea of liquid jade 

His ship comes shining 

like a crystal swan in a sky of suns 

His ship comes shining — B Cockbum 

Sometimes, when I'm feeling really crazy. 

I'll go out and pick up a,, chili dog. — Venus 

Summer without baseball: 

a disruption to the psyche. — W P Klnsella 

It's easy to get buried in the past 

when you try to make a good thing last — N Young 

Jazz Ensemble College Times Mucky Duck 

Symphonic Band 1 si Soccer Rotisseme 

Little Theatre 1st Squash Ski Day 

Janus Brewball Late N;yht 



From left to right - top to bottom: D. 

Wilson, J. Ketchum, J. Viljoen, R. Press, 
T. Young, C. Duffield, A. Houghton, T. 
Hylton, C. Offman, R. Gambhir 
Absent: I. Pringle, N. Ross, B. Chalmers 

Character. This is the underlying factor which gives Martland's its 
special variety. Five years ago, Mr. Agnew assumed his role as 
housemaster among the newboys of our current leaving class. 
During the ensuing years our House underwent quite a few 
changes, but that particular fraternity-like spirit was constant; 
sometimes laid back, periodically bizzare, and always sincere. This 
has never been the case more than in our year. 

Our new assistant housemaster, Mr. Payne, replacing Mr. 
Koenka who is on a sabatical down under, brought new vigour, 
charm, and a sense of humour to the house. Initially it seemed as 
though our Prefect's room would become the nerve centre for 
grade thirteen socializing, however the arrival of certain smelly 
rowing garments altered that situation rather swiftly - sorry guys. 

Martland's welcomed an exceptionally large new-boy class, with 
more spunk and character (characters?) than I thought possible. 
This shone through at our house party - great legs guys! Speaking of 
which, that little stunt was orchestrated by our grade twelves, and I 
wish to point out that a rowdier, louder, and more enthusiastic class 
does not exist! 

Finally, our leaving class. From the occasionally zany Bill 
Chalmers to the always friendly Rich Press, and everyone in 
between, this is an exceptional group of people. We've seen real 
camaraderie develop between Craig Offman and Rob Gambhir. 
Ian Pringle was always there (well, most of the time) to give an 

encouraging word. And who can forget good old "Barney" 
Houghton, who can only be described as irreplaceable. Of course 
there are more, however there is not much more space. 

Thanks Martland's. You've been a very large influence on my 
entire education. I have only the fondest of memories. 

As always, 

P.S. John Loewen, You were absolutely right! 






Art '81-86 

School First day of term Loads of GCE homework 1 will never 

cope 1 am an intellectual but 

at the same time I am not 

very clever 

— Adrian Mole 

NY '85 Blazers2 


Stotes '84 

OH. what a fun bunch of guys 

- SQUAT 4' 



— Vicious Pink 

Fire and Desire '84 

— Buffalo Gals' 

Have you ever. ever, ever' 

— Colin & Me 

— Henley Tour (Pandora) 

bve for the moment 


The Right Stuff. 

Tim. Dune. Craig. Mark. Oarsmen et al 

Thanks Guys' 

And. as always, my pnde is on 

:he line 

— Others 


'80- - 81 
'84- - 86 

I'm just a simple guy and I live from day to day 
A ray of sunshine melts the clouds and blows 
my blues away 

— Led Zeppelin 

Well I pick up all the pieces and make an island might even 
raise a little sand 

— Jimi Hendrix 

it is indeed. James, a full life and a merry one 

And you may ask yourself, how did 1 get here 7 

— Talking Heads 

Twas bliss then to be alive, but to be young was very 
heaven — Wordsworth 

When you are expecting the worst you get something that is not 
so bad. after all — Mark Twain 

Love and Thanks lo Alison E . Elizabeth F . Mom and Dad 
Thanks to Yasmar Same]' 

Respect and thanks to HRH. T P O'D B . Matt. Mikey. Cap'n 

I remain sirs, your humble sound man 

"I've got 11, loo. Omar ... a strange feeling like weVe 
just been going in circles." 

— Lords 

Challenges; obstacles are why we feel the need to get up in the 
morning A perfect world would be virtual hell i.e. so 

— Montgomery 

Can you judge a man by the way he wears his hair?/Or can you 
read his mind by the clothes that he wears'/Or can you see a 
bad man by the pattern on his tie 9 / Well then, mister, you're a 
better man than I 

— Yard birds 




The Lord is my shephard, I shall not want. 

He makes me down to lie. 

Through pastures green he leadeth me, 

The silent waters by 

With bright knives he releaseth my soul 

He maketh me to hang on hooks in high places 

He converteth me to lamb cutlets. 

For lo, he hath great power, and great hunger 

When cometh the day we lowly ones, 

Through quiet reflection, and great dedication, 

Master the art of karate 

Lo, we shall rise up, 

And then we"ll make the buggers eyes water. 

Pink Floyd 




I count religion as but a childish toy 
And hold there is no sin but ignorance 

— Marlowe, The Jew of Malta 

Quieta movere merces videbatur 

And if you ever have to go to school 

Remember how this messed up this jolly fool 
And if the homework bnngs you down 
Then we'll throw it on the fire 
And take the car downtown. 

For most of us, we have two lives; 
A life to live and a life to leam. 
Thanx to U.CC. and my parents 


J'ai Vecu 

— Brouhaha 1984- 

f \ 

~~\ twuwosss h$woi* mi-mam* 

m mHmmt 

¥ , 


Procrastination is the thief of time. 

Last of the Prep Boarders 1 / 79 Voyage En France / Computer 

Boys '84 / DSFC '82-'85 / '85 Terry Fox Youth Centre / 

George Thorogood '85 / Toronto JR Group '83 / "I was so in 

love with me" — Gabnel 

Preacher preaching love like vengeance 

Preaching love like hate ... — Joni Mitchell 

"Life's a BITCH and then you DIE." 

Secret of Success: (1 ) Get a job. (2) Get a better job (3) Get an 

even better job (Repeat if necessary ) 

- LIFE IN HELL by Matt Groening 
Toronto Twilight Communications — R.I. P. 

Good Luck! J.D & C.T you're the best! 
Dear Kathy You broke my heart — but who cares 

Thought I'd something more to say,.. — Floyd 


my lord and 



My life has no purpose, no direction, no aim. no meaning, and 
yet I'm happy I can't figure it out What am I doing right? 

- Charles M Shulz 

The power of accurate observation is commonly called 
cynicism by those who have not got it. 

— George Bernard Shaw 

We can't all be heroes because someone has to sit on the curb 
and clap as they go by. 

- Will Rogers 

Procrastination kills 

.go for a soda 

Library graffiti 
- Kim Mitchell 








From quiet homes and first beginning, 
Out to the undiscovered ends. 

There's nothing worth the wear of winning. 
But laughter and the love of friends 

Between simile and metaphor lies all the gnef in the world. 
— Edward Albee 

It is easy to show a scar. It is hard to show a pimple 

— Leonard Cohen 

They haven't said much about the meaning of life yet have 

— Monty Python 

Why worry? 

Swim Team OFSAA '85, '86 
The Jam 
Jazz Ensemble 
Symphonic Band 

Rowing '83-'86, Interact, Henlay '84 
Brandenberg '85 

Thank You Everybody 


Estragon What do we do now 9 

Vladimir I don't know 

Estragon: Let's go 

Vladimir We can't 

Estragon Why not 9 

Vladimir We're waiting for Godot 


Samuel Beckett 

This time it vanished quite slowly, beginning with the end of the 
trail, and ending with the grin, which remained some time after 
the rest of it had gone — Lewis Carroll 

First Football '85 Swim Team '82-85 

Track Team '82-86 4x400 JD GD Who' (SF) ME 9 DP 
What is youze boy. ignorant? (Speed kills') 
Humour Editor '85 (Funny peculiar or funny ha-ha 9 ) 
Thanks Mom and Dad. N. V. E, K, A-Z' et Al 



Monday arrives on schedule You skip through the first ten 
hours God only knows what happened to Sunday. 

— Jay Mclnemey 

I went upstairs, had a smoke, somebody spoke and 1 fell 
into a dream. — Beatles 

Dreams never die. just dreamers. 
Dream never dies if it's strong, 

C'est Absurde 

2nd Hockey '84-'85 
Brew Ball '85-'86 
Senior Tennis '85-'86 
Gleeping It '84-'86 

— Eagles 

— Barney 



From left to right: P. Wong, C. Furness, 
A. Naiberg, A. Heintzman, T. Christie, D. 
Matthews, B. Roberts, B. Hatcher, A. 
Juman, N. Mens. 

Absent: R. Ho Ping Kong, S. Kekko, D. 
Preger, B. Sharwood, Mr. D. Poon. 

McHugh's has undergone considerable change in the past few 
years. The House has withstood many transitions beginning with 
the appointment of Mr. Mens as permanent Housemaster, and Mr. 
Poon as assistant Housemaster in the fall. 1 believe I'm correct in 
saying that we are the first House in the 157 year history of the 
school to have had two Heads in one year. 

McHugh's is a unit within a greater system whose goal is to secure 
a feeling of stability and belonging through a sense of self-worth. 
Although the road has been bumpy in the recent past I feel that we 
were all able to attain a sense of pride. Without pride, the system 
collapses, I feel however, there are two distinctly different versions 
of pride in this respect. Pride in McHugh's is something that I feel is 
developed over a periods of years. It is not a transient feeling based 
on such things as results in house events. It is not something that is 
taught or enforced; rather it is somewhat of a relationship that 
realizes its original goal as it is evolved in all our minds. 

By the same token leadership itself does not have a single, 
tangible form. Common to all such philosophies however, is the 
essence of what our years at U.C.C. do for us. We grow to 
appreciate and respect others, not for mere skills and achievement, 
but for those deeper characteristics that promote individuality and 
hence define the individual. 

Students in McHugh's attain a deeper sense of place than others 
in that they realize they are not always the fastest, strongest, most 

academic people, and that it doesn't really matter if they are. 
Sometimes we win, sometimes we lose, sometimes, just sometimes, 
we don't even play at all. The important thing is that we do maintain 
our sense of identity. There exists a sense of unity, whether it be 
because we are all A-formers (HA! B-formers live!), or because 
we're all delinquents. Judgement on such a relative scale doesn't 
really have much meaning. The point is that over time, everybody 
finds their groove, perhaps as the House jock or the House 
intellectual. As they progress through the ranks, their groove 
deepens and they gain respect from their peers. It is out of this 
respect that one develops that sense of belonging, so essential to 
the success of the House system. 

Next year, yet another handful of "privileged" people will find out 
what it really means to be a U.C.C. student. I hope it's not too much 
of a shock- Happy trails & groove on! 




! am what I am and that's all that I am. I'm Popeye the Sailor 
Man Toot'Toot' 



Been in trouble but I'm Ok 

Been through the ringer and I'm Ok 

Under the mercy and I'm Ok 

Walls are falling and I'm Ok — Bruce Cockbum 

Well, tell me more, tell me more 

Tell me more; I mean was he a heavy doper 

Or was he just a loser'-' He was a friend of yours 

He tried to do his best but he could not — Neil Young 

— Joni Mitchell 

Will you take me as I am? 
McHugh's Prefects Room '85-'86 

The Jam '82-'86 
Ski Day Survivor 

Bart Neil Young, Boot Hill '85 

Greyhound Bus, Hare Knshna. Gashouse '84 


Well say Goodbye 
It's Independence Day 
It's Independence Day 
All boys must run away 
So say Goodbye 
It's Independence Day 

Goodbye Cruel World 
I'm leaving you today 
Goodbye Goodbye Goodbye 
Goodbye all you people 
There's nothing you can say 
To make me change my mind 


- Pink Floyd 

And someone said fair warning 

Lord will strike that poor boy down. 

Went to hunt somebody down 
We may never never never come home. 
But the magic that we feel is worth a lifetime 

— Ronnie James Dio 

I don't know how it happened. 

It all took place so quick. 

Here's what's really at the end 

of the rainbow, scary- eh kids' 

Johnny, now those days have ended 

There's no more time on our side 

They say. in a little while 

It will all take on a new light — The Dream Academy 

Haven't they told you to cut your hair yel? 

- Van Halen 

— Dire Straits 

— Triumph 





Of all the things that we do ourselves, there are few that mean 

as much — I Pouserte-Dart 

If you keep cutting corners, you'll end up going in circles 
Thy life is but young, for the journey had just begun 

How does it feel, to be on your own with no direction home, a 
complete unknown. Like a Rolling Stone — Bob Dylan 

1st X-Country skiing '83-'86 Rugby "85 

1st Volleyball '85 Interact '84-'86 

Biathlon team '85 Swim team '83 
Duke of Edinburgh gold award winner '85 





It is better to debate a question without solving it than to solve a 

question without debating it 

I get by with a little help from my fnends 

It is better to invent reality 

than to copy it — Verdi 



Symphonic Band 

Jazz Ensemble 

Debating Prez 

Thanks Mom, Dad. & Holly 

— Beethoven 

TPO'DB Travel Club '84 

West Side Story '86 

England '86 



I'd like to end up sort of unforgettable — Ringo Stan- 

Many times l*ve wondered 

how much there is to know — Led Zeppelin 

The things I know how to do. I do perfectly; 
the things I don't know how to do, I do very well 

— Zorba the Greek 
I've never had any real education. 

'cept for maybe school. — David Lee Roth 

First you get the money, then you get the power, then you get 
the women. — Tony "Scarface" Montana 

Band (Retired) Thanks Dad. Mom & Adam Ace 

First Hockey (Cap) First Football 

Chicago. Boston To all my friends THANKS 


Geo '85 (Coulson!) ("C'est Absurde"") 


man stands in front of me 
ir man behind my back 
lieve they can control the game 

X-Country '81 -'86 
X-C-Skiing '83-'86 
USSR. '86 

Genesis '74 

Track '82-'86 

Thanks DSP & RW 

TJ Hymnbucket 





Take it easy, don't let the sound of your own wheels dnve • 
you crazy 

— Eagles 

Such is the rich pageantry of life 

Football, hockey, rugby, track 

Thanks all 

Your laughter bnngs me joy 

Chief Inspecor Clouseau 


AZAZ JUMAN 76-'86 

I used to hurry a lot 

I used to worry a lot 

I used to stay up till the break of day 

Oh. that didn't get it 

It was high time [ quit it 

I just couldn't carry on that way... 

Thanks you two — you know who you are 

Elliot Lake and beyond ... 

Later - AD . Glue. P Notes. A C, N H„ A.B. - Citrus Kings 



Trout trudged onward, a stranger in a strange land His 
pilgrimage was rewarded with new wisdom, which would never 
have been his had he remained in his basement m Cohoes He 
learned the answer to a question many human beings were 
asking themselves so frantically: "What's blockjng traffic on the 
westbound barrel of the Midland City stretch of the 
Interstate 9 " — Kurt Vonnegut. Jr 

We are healthy only to the extent that our ideas are 
humane — Kilgore Trout 

Life is funny, skies are sunny, bees make honey, who needs 
money? — Ten Years After 

Endless C harry. . 


To whom much is given, much is expected 
X-country, Track '81 -'86 



Got a beat up glove, home-made 

Bat and a brand new pair of shoes... 

I think it's time to give this game 

a ride., just to hit the ball, and 

touch them all. a moment in the sun 

It's gone, and you can tell that one 

goodbye Oh put me in coach 

I'm ready to play today look at me. 

I can be centerfield — J F 

Train roll on on down the line — R V.Z 

And it occurred to me that some way back 
I began a sentence that I have never 

Long may you run 

- FMF 

- Netl Brewball '85 



Present from left to right: Mr. Ben 

Briglio, Mr. Reed Barter 
Absent: E. Abbott, P. Adams, G. Bailey, 
D. Caldwell, D. Chalk, G. Day, D. Deeks, 
S. Diab, B. Heddle, T. Hore, M. 
McCutcheon, G. Moore, D. Probyn, K. 
Russell, B. Wherrett 

Dear Mr. Barter, Most Days, 1985-86 

Please excuse our absences from prayers. ..again, as we were all 
overcome by previous committments. I am fully aware that this note 
should have been in your hands yesterday, but you know how it is 
when we train too hard for the House Cross-Country -it soon 
becomes the only thing on our minds. 

Fortunately, we all remembered our important engagements. 
Unfortunately, they all conflicted with our official morning snooze. 
You see, Greg had an important executive meeting out back, and 
Sacha was still driving people home from a party. ..In Etobicoke. 
Murray (Arthur) had a ballet class (I bet you havn't heard that one 
yet!) and Paul got lost somewhere around St. Clair and Avenue 
Road. Rob and Brian were out finding Batt dates, but didn't realize 
it took longer than five minutes to get from Jarvis to U.C.C. Deeker 
had a hair appointment and Jake's coffee pot broke. Gary and Tim 
lost their oars and are still floating somewhere in Lake Ontario. 
Probo was here but he fell asleep before getting into Laidlaw Hall 
and Dave Chalk had six spares.. .again. Eric eloped with Lee 
Iacocca. Thus I was stuck writing this note, which took so long to 
compose that I missed prayers as well. As for the younger guys in 

the House, they were on a safari - Boo Boo was let out of the zoo 

So you see, we weren't being delinquent, nor were we expressing 
our dissatisfaction at not being allowed to yell MOW in prayers. Of 
course not! We were merely putting our time to more effective 

Yours Sincerely, 


PS. Seriously guys, it was a super year. We may not have won the 
Prefect's Cup, but we had a helluva good time losing it. It's too bad 
they don't give points for spirit because we would have cleaned up. 
Just remember, IF IT AIN'T BLUE & GRAY... 

Thanks to everyone in Mow, 

You've all been the greatest. 




Never regret what you have not done. 

- WRfl 

We live as a dream • alone 

— Conrad 


- WKR 

As coo! as the pale wet leaves 

of lily-of-the-valley 
She lav beside me n the lawn 

— Pound 

You would have said he was just exactly the 
would have trusted your wife with 

sort of chap you 
-FM Ford 

First Squash '83-'86 

First Volleyball '85 

If it ain't the BLUE and GRAY 

Fatso's *85-'86 
University > 


Possunt quia posse videntur 

Ed. we don't really look all that different But has it really been a 
decade? (see C.T 1977) 

Warmest thanks to Mr Barter and Mr Lowndes for putting up 
with me over the years. 

Thanks also to Craig and John I J and tack to Stine through 
whom I have learned a great deal. 

Mum and Dad too Jeg elsker dig 



- 82-'86 

But one creature said at last, "I am tired of clinging. Though I 
cannot see it with my eyes, I trust that the current knows where 
it is going I shall let go. and let it take me where it will Clinging, I 
shall die of boredom " Taking a breath, he let go and at once 
was tumbled and smashed by the current across the rocks Yet 
in time, as the creature refused to cling again, the current lifted 
him free from the bottom, and he was bruised and hurt no 
more The river delights to lift us free, if only we dare to let go. 
Our true work is this voyage, this adventure 

— Richard Bach 
He was always afraid of becoming and ordinary person 

— David Byme 
I just know that something good is going to happen 
First Soccer Brewball. West Side. Believe m it 



Success lies not in never failing. 
but in nsing every time we fall 

A |oumey of a thousand miles begins with the first step. 

— Chinese Preverb 

New Zealand Tour '86 

Jarvis = UCC 

Key member in Mega Force and Bolder Club 

Special thanks to the Bredin Bread Co. 


Once 1 had a little game 
I liked to crawl back into my brain 
I think you know what game I mean 
I mean the game called 'go insane' 

— Jim Morrison 

Ain't getting old, ain't getting younger though 

Just getting used to the lay of the land 

I ain't tougue tied, just don't got nothing to say 

I'm proud to be living in (Canada) — Neil Young 

The headaches are all gone 

And it's morning in this song 


Let's go to Haw — Max Webster 

Ski Team '82-'86 
Stubbie club 

North of the Greb Line Geo '85 
Eternal Brew Ball member 





A cynic is a person who knows the price of everything and the 

value of nothing — O Wilde 

What's a man's first duty 7 The answer's brief to be himself 

— Ibsen 

Say goodbye to all your fnends, 

Were gonna be sorry 

For a while that's how it goes 

But then who knows 

About the rain — John Lynne 

What's the scoop? 

Fla '82-'86 

Thanks Mom and Dad 

First Football *84-'86 First Hockey '83-'86 


1 don't care about pollution 

I'm an air conditioned gypsy 

That's my solution 

Watch the police and the tax man miss me 

I'm mobile — The Wh< 

Law of Life's Highway: 

If everything is coming your way. you're in the wrong lane 

The line it is drawn 
The curse it is cast 
The slow one now 
Later be fast 

Track Team Sun 

r '82-'86 

— Bob Dylan 



Thanks to everyone I've ever met 


LABATYD (PP&CS&S&KDFC Squav lives' 




79- - 86 

You have not done enough, you have never done enough, so 
long as it is possible that you have something of value to 

— Dag Hammarskjold 

The 807 - Tube Power' 

Nobody does it better' 

Alchemists, Symphonic Band, Inside-Out Club 
National Aero- Space Corporation 

Pedalling up the hill was good, but it will be fun to coast down 
the other side But not too fast please, or it will be over too 
soon — Gerald Moore 

Know thyself Perhaps you've gone all these years without 
knowing yourself at all You need a chum Start at the bottom 
with a dog. — William Goldmg 

It is certain any conviction gains infinitely the moment another 
soul will believe in it Ni w .ilis 

What's the use of getting sober, when you're gonna get drunk 
again 1 — Joe Jackson 

They took a clean cut kid and made a killer out of him. that's 
what they did! — Bob Dylan 

North of the Grebline '85. CGTT '82-'85; Ski Day "82-'85; 
Russia '86, SOS 79-'86; Brew Ball 85/86; WCPA 84-86. Bart 
Club 84-?; lnt' Year of the Greek' GO MOW' 



79- - 86 

"There must be some way out of here." said the joker to the 
thief There's too much confusion, and I can't get no 
relief " — Bob Dylan 

Welcome. O life' I go to encounter for the millionth time the 
reality of experience and to forge in the smith of my soul the 
uncreated conscience of my race — James Joyce 

Love many, trust few 

Always paddle your own canoe 

— My Mom's leaving class quote 

It's the brutal honesty that I dig — Duvellisna 

The dream of the Blue Bird bus lives on... 
Brewball. Greb Line. New Zealand Tennis. Wash 

MURRAY W. 77-'86 



It's always the little things that you do in life that count so 
much. — David 'Lub' Latimer 

Lookin' for fun and feelin' groovy — Simon and Garf unkel 

God grant me courage to change the things 1 can. serenity to 
accept the things I cannot change, and wisdom to know the dif- 
ference between them — Reinhold Niebuhr 
Spontaneity is the truest of emotions. 
The legend of the Shank Tank lives on 
Now we can get down to what is really wrong — Van 

Brewball '85-'86. GREEAAAT". FATSO'S. France 79. CGTB 
'82 '86. USSR '84, Geo '85-NOTGL Times '85-'86. Wash 
'86. If it ain't the Blue and Grey 
Duke of Ed Silver and Gold, M thanks Moose 


Thanks to my family - both my own and the one at U.C.C. 







He did not have enough money to go to Wisconsin in the 
accepted fashion True Why not mail himself It was absurdly 
simple He would ship himself parcel post special delivery 

— The Velvet Underground 
You go do that — AJ/AD 

Out of the red and into the black 

Life's been good: they think I'm crazy, but I have a good time - 
thanks Mom. Dad. Mike. David and Sandy (isn't this better than 
a picture ') 

One homemade BACON cheeseburger — Frank & Danny 
X-Country '82-'85. Track and FLOYD '85. New Zealand '86. 
Geo '85- "Elliot Lake and Beyond". Nieu-Nieu-Ne-Nee- 
Neeeeee-ee"'!! Joe W: Hey. I'm freaking out up there! 


How do you know that the fruit is ripe? Simply because it leaves 
the tree 

— Andre Gide 

A man's maturity consists of having found again the serious- 
ness one had as a child, at play. 

— Nietzsche 

Smooth runs the water where the brook is deep 

It was an early morning yesterday; 
I was up before the dawn 
And I really have enjoyed my stay. 
But 1 must be moving on 


— Supertramp 



From left to right: Mr N Barber, R. 
Field, T. Charlton, R. Barry, M. Hyland, B. 
Plaxton, T. McCartney, Mr. M. Miller. 
Absent: J. Andersen, J. Dickson, C. 
Lewis, P. Mayer, D. Rodrigues, M. 

Well once again it's time to add yet another page to the 
continuing saga of Orr's House, and this time round marks the tenth 
anniversary of it's founding. And while celebrations to comme- 
morate this momentous occasion were limited to a pop and donut 
party in Orr's lower lounge, the spirit in the House was stronger than 

The year started out well with an overall transformation of the 
Orr's image, which some felt to be too nondescript since the 
untimely departure of Kelvin Connely. The new Orr's House T-shirt 
really gave the House a feeling of distinction, and it's rumoured that 
concept consultant J. Ando was recently aproached by both Iron 
Maiden and Black Sabbath with offers for similar design work. 

Unfortunately the cedar wood for our Prefect's room sauna 
never arrived due to some mix up in our financing department, 
although the sensory deprivation cell that was eventually cons- 
tructed proved very popular for spares-let alone whole weeks. 

As for school activities, Orr's was constantly on the go in and out 
of the classroom. Of particular interest was our record setting 
performance in the House Swim Meet. This year two Orrsmen 

qualified for the finals (doubling last year's total) but unfortunately 
had to swim under protest for the illegal use of water wings. In 
general the House contributed strongly to anything they could. In 
fact Orr's only needs about a thousand more points to tie for first 
place in the Prefect's Cup, and the banana eating contest is still 
coming up. 

Orr's House has always had a different perspective on school life. 
And although the House is not without it's share of personal and 
team successes, I hope the House will never lose it's amazing ability 
to take things as they come, something I think every Orrsman 
secretly appreciates. Things are as they should be. 

Thanks to everyone and good luck next year. 



In my new life I'm travellin' light 

Eyes wide open for the next move 

I can't go wrong 'till I get right 

But I'm not fallin' back in the same groove 

'Cause I've got my own row left to hoe 

Just another line in the field of time 

When the thrasher comes 111 be stuck in the sun 

bke Dinosaurs in shrines 

But I'll know the time has come to give what's mine 

And if I live I'll be coming back again 
in the bright sky. bnght sky 
Long may you run 

— Neil Young and Bruce Cockburn 


Nevertheless, I think he is a remarkable man 
wave on. wave on. . 
eight, J 

'81 -'86 

Road to Nowhere 

Well we know where we're goin' 

But we don't know where we've been 

And we know what we're knowin' 

But we can't say what we've seen 

And we're not little children 

And we know what we want 

And the future is certain 

Give us time to work it out. 

If you can't dazzle them with brilliance 
baffle them with bullshit 

Come on now, you can do it. 


Rowing is not a small part of life, 
life is a small part of rowing 

Hope deffered maketh the heart sick: 

but when the desire cometh. it is a tree of life. 

Rowing. P-Town '84. '85. '86 
X-C Running '84. '85, '86 
X-C Ski '84, '85, "86 
Cycling "86 


— Bobbsey Twins 




Skill and confidence are an unconquered army 

— G Herbert 
A winner goes through a problem; a loser goes around it, and 
never gets past it. — Ando 

Everything is funny as long as it happens to somebody else 
-RUK Ding 
I care not what others think of what I do. but I care very much 
about what I think of what I do That is character — A.J. 
It's great to be great, but it's greater to be human 

— Will Rogers 



Thanks Forbes and Bobbie Eagle. R.H.S , and all the clowns in 




What another would have done as well as you. do not do it 
What another would have said as well as you do not say it. writ- 
ten as well, do not wnte it Be faithful to that which exists nowhere 
but in yourself - and thus make yourself indispensible 

— Andre Gide 
Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm 

— Ralph Waldo Emerson 

Did you exchange the walk-on part in the war for the lead role 
in a cage''' — Pink Floyd 

Young Dnvers of Canada WANTS YOU' - D A R W 

Symphonic Band 84-86. Ottawa 84. Montreal 85. New York 
85. Geo 85; Ottawa 85, West Side Story. USSR 86, 
Washington 86, Kingston 86. Dough-heads, Tape of the day. 
LABATYD 1 would like to thank the Academy also, my 
parents, friends and teachers 


When I don't have blue. I use red 
I shut my eyes in order to see 


— P Picasso 
— P Gaughin 

Regrets. I've had a few, but then again, too few to mention 

— F Sinatra 

It matters not what you are thought to be, but what you 

— Anon 
- J Davis 
D Adams 

It's not the having, it's the getting 

So long, and thanks for all the fish. 

We should do this more often, , 

Beanerclub limited edition. 85-86 

Marine Bio. 85 Fish, 85 Photo Club, 85 

Thanks Mum and Dad for ensuring a good education 

Specials to Al'n'Cyndi'n'Cam'n'Chris'n'friends 


Beauty is truth, truth beauty. - that is all 
Ye know on earth, and all ye need to know 

— John Keats 

And perhaps, too. you may hear, as you sit so quietly and 
still, the rustle of falling leaves, hear the magic call of Talking 
Watery and the soft low sound of voices, the voices of the 
Forest People, both large and small, who dwell in that land that 
is so far away, that is so wild, and yet so beautiful, the Land of 
the North West Wind - Grey Owl 

First Cricket '86 New Zealand '86 Parkway Club 

Badminton '85 The Weather 

Editor/Phoenix '85-'86 First ISSO 1985 

Thanks Mom and Dad for your prayers and support 




We've got lo kick at the darkness 'till it bleeds daylight 

— Bruce Cockburn 

Everything counts in large amounts 

Give a little bit 

■ Depeche mode 

— Supertramp 

Where do we go from here, now that all of the children are 
growing up! 

— Alan Parsons 
We made it. Alex' 
1st Football. Survivor 
Thanks Mom & Dad 




The stupidity of people comes from having an answer for 
everything The wisdom of the novel comes from having a 
question for everything. — Milan Kundera 

First you commit yourself; then you see. 

- WA Williams 

So I carry these scars, precious and rare, 
and tonight I feel like I'm made of air.. 


The Jam 

The College Times 

— Bruce Cockburn 

Digne 1985 

Albany River 1983 

Georgian Bay 



The problem with being punctual is that everyone thinks you 
have nothing better to do 

— Globe and Mail Morning Smile 

Everyone who takes themselves too seriously is absurd 

- WP Kinsella 

Don't know what they taught me. for the real teachers never 
teach you craft 

— Michael Ondaatje 

All animals are equal 

George Orwell 

1 would give the world for someone to teach me how to read at 
a snail's pace 

— Reuben. Reuben 


76- - 86 

Persons attempting to find a motive in it will be prosecuted; per- 
sons attempting to find a moral in it will be banished; persons 
attempting to find a plot in it will be shot. — Mark Twain 

Without fnends none would choose to live, though he had all 
other goods. — Aristotle 

When its darkest all around you. maybe you are the one who 
can tum on the light — ? 

I feel much more like I do now than I did when I got here 
— Robert Redhend 

Thanks to Moue & Cheese, good times shared with M.D.A.- 
J.S.HA.HL et all To all. love always & forever* And to AN who 
taught me to fly 




From left to right: Mr R Mee, B 
Walenius, F. Hassard, Mr. R. Morrow 

Well, the way I see it, Mr. Morrow and Mr. Mee led the House. 
What's worse, I'm the Head of House, the prefects of the House 
hardly do anything, the grade twelve boys run most of the activities, 
the prefect's room smells and it's rumoured that an alligator lives 
under the couch, the House blaster still can't be found, and the 
grade nines don't know their own names yet. But still, we stand in 
second place in the Prefect's Cup standings - we must be doing 
something right. 

Maybe our success comes from the younger grades. The nines 
and tens are all settled in their own niches-teams, clubs, and other 
activities all benefit from a Scadding's representation. Or perhaps 
our strong middle grades are the driving force behind most 
Scadding's teams. It's also possible that the leadership of the leaving 
class (all of whom can usually be found lazing around somewhere in 
the sub-bowels of the school) can be credited for Scadding's 
success. I'm sure our Prefect's Cup standings are partially a result of 
a combination of those factors. 

But more importantly Scadding's had a lot of fun in 1985/86. 
The new boys earned their place in the house by braving the muddy 
waters of a farm pond. House Soccer packed as much of a punch as 
a kick in their games. In swimming we dominated - and our 
Scadding's junior medley relay set a new record in the TDCAA 
swim meet, and the House hockey teams did a lot of skating and 
passing (but not too much scoring!) 

Maybe next year we'll take back the Cup that should be ours. 






He that nseth late, must trot all day. and shall scarce overtake 
his business at night — B Franklin 

Whoever is happy will make others happy too — A Frank 

We should all be concerned about the future because we will 
have to spend the rest of our lives there. 

— C Franklin Kettering 

Rowing lightweights 

Swimming, running, x-country skiing 

Thanks Everyone 



79- - 86 

A ship in a harbour is safe, but that is not what ships are 
built for. 

I was gratified to be able to answer promptly, and I did I said I 
didn't know. — Mark Twain 

I have nothing to offer but blood, toil, tears and sweat 

When once the itch of literature comes over a man. nothing can 
cure it but the scatchmg of a pen — Robert Frost 

Tell the truth or trump - but get the tnck — Mark Twain 
Thanks to all and to all a good night — Bruce Walenius 



- 81-'86 

The past cannot remember the past. The future can't generate 
the future. The cutting edge of this instant right here and now is 
always nothing less than the totality of everything there is 

— R.M Pirsig 

If you want to find the answer, do not seek it 

The greatest man is nobody. 

Thanks and love to John. Mom. Dad. Elaine and Chia Chia for 
their support and understanding 



j o iii mw 




When in dire straits I've always had people I could count on, 
and I thank them I would like to thank one person in particular 
for their support and consistency, you know who you are 
Thank you 

When you grow up you'll understand, there comes a time when 
you gotta dance. — Dr Johnny Fever 

l*m sorry but this is a non-alcoholic function, An empty bottle 
makes more noise. — Mr Allen 

If you can't reach the end. beat the hell out of the sides 

— C Ground 
Hey, I'm freakin' out up here — Joe Walsh 

Remember-CD (JJ). PA, Ireland. Billy-Bob, Nail, Glue. 
Barn. B Bruce. Brook-Trout, J D , Grounder, Todd, NNNaiberg, 
Luko, Chief, Booger, Dude. Jando. Geo '85, G.P. du Montreal 
"84. '86, Ski Day '86, Elliot Lake and Beyond. Camel Man 

( r.Mlun- 





They screw you up, your mum and dad 

They may not mean to. but they do 
They fill you with the faults they had 

And add some extra, )ust for you 
But they were screwed up in their turn 

By fools in old-style hats and coats. 
Who half the time were soppy-stem 

And half at one another's throats. 
Man hands on misery to man 

It deepens like a coastal shelf 
Get out as early as you can, 

And don't have any kids yourself — Philip Larkin 

1st Hockey What a coach 1 1st Football 

WBHA Lives Montreal '84 New York '85 

Nice '85 Ottawa "85 Russia '86 

Thanks to all my friends and Scadding's Prefect Room 



Talk tt's only talk 

Arguments, agreement, advice, answers, articulate announce- 
ment It's only talk Talk it's only talk 
Babble, burbble. bicker, bicker, brouhaha, 
balderdash, balyhoo. 

talk, elephant talk. — King Crimson 

Look for the ndiculous in everything, and you will find it 

— Jules Renard 
You know I don't talk much 

Except to myself 
Caus*' there's not much to say 

And (here's nobody else — Bryan Ferry 

Most people are other people Their thoughts are someone 

else's opinions, their lives a mimicry, their passions a quotation 

— Oscar Wilde 

We are ugly, but we have the music — Sincerely L Cohen 


Some people continually make the same mistakes 
Some people learn from there own mistakes 
Those who will truly succeed; 

learn from other peoples mistakes 

with political knowledge, and a momma of substance and 
high habbit. and a youth that had in it such things as regular 
vacations to Miami Beach, plus a boarding school and even 
tragedy, like a sister drowning and never being recovered, to 
give a glimpse of. say, woe-which is surely the kind of shape 
you'd like your own daddy's character to have when he's about 
to round a no-account corner in the desert, a Ray Austin lyric 
on his lips, and kill a man 

The moral: everything is fragile — Lee K Abbott 

Thanks Lawrence Park, Susan. Tracy. Jason. LYNN 
See you on the Deck at Cleves' Survivor (76-'86) 


•81 -'86 

When I was young, it seemed that life was so wonderful, 
a miracle, oh it was beautiful, magical 

But then they sent me away to teach me how to be sensible, 
logical, responsible, practical. — R Hodgson 

Did you get all you want? 
Did we see the whole show? 
So where's all the fun 
That we used to know? 
As the memories fade 
Way out of view 
I'd love those old days 

To come back to you. — R Davies 

Nice "84. '85 
Havergal 71-75: A MARGIE FOREVER! 

/^ERE, 1M£:(IE, ■£>£"*,«. — I 

[ X K^£>w ybu r><?rvi'T j"\ 

\ U\V£-6T Scv\oo\~ — 

ML. A <?* 

f e>vr «*s a \ 

/ 'fefCMER. v^o 


I /vr.js'f <5<? 13,A r t^ ' 

^-is^ % 




Left to right: G. Gladdy, M. Slinger, J-F 
Proulx, H. Lai, G. Wilson, M. Valihora, M. 
Chandrasekaran, M. Edin, H. To 
Serving drinks: Mr. C. Lowndes, Mr. A. 
Turner, Mr. D. Blakey 

Seaton's House has survived another year on pizzas and 
panzerottos. Thanks to the spiritual guidance and moral support of 
our unofficial panzo man, Murali. 

With the extra energy boost, Seatonians have been able to do 
well in the athletics department. As usual, we did well in the 
gymnasium, with some great efforts in House Volleyball and House 
Basketball. Our House Soccer results improved vastly from last 
year's. House Hockey has always been our sport, as many fine, 
brutal games were had on the ice. As an ex-Seatonian said, "We 
always had the home team advantage." 

Our housemasters have had their highlights too. First Mr. 
Lowndes' marriage and then Mr. Blakey's appointment as vice- 
principal, both came as pleasant surprises. Mr. Procunier, after 
being a tough housemaster for the last two years, has finally been 
domesticated and tamed. Last but not least, the House got many 
laughs from Mr. Turner's "close encounters of the best kind." 

Seatonians have always lived together as a happy family. The 
third floor, where wrestling matches occasionally occur, was the 

2"V*r \, v 

usual zoo, while life goes on in a quasi-civilized manner on the first 
and second floors. Georgina, Louisa, and Yvonne must be thanked 
for changing our bed sheets and cleaning our rooms day in and day 
out. Meanwhile, we must not forget the special attention Dennis 
pays to the floor. 

Congratulations and thanks are due to Mr. Blakey, for he has 
done an excellent job in his first year as Seaton's senior 
housemaster. While some of us will be moving on to other places, 
the house is undoubtedly left in good hands. I can only see Seaton's 
becoming stronger and better in the years to come. 



'83- - 86 

Achieving good performance is a journey - not a desti- 

— O.M.M. 

Leadership is being visible when things are going awry, and 
invisible when they are working well. 

- I.S.O.E. 


1 had so much to say that I forgot to say it 
First Basketball '85-'86 


You are too serious 

Thanks to Mom, Dad and Seaton's House 

Rusty Spnngs 

Motonzed Slurpee Trekker 

- D S SB 



Destiny is not to be waited for. it is to be achieved. 

So we beat on. boats against the current, borne back 
ceaselessly into the past — F Scott Fitzgerald 

It seems that you have accumulated three gatings and one 
detention to date What's going on??? — J.D Blakey 

1 knew this life of sloth and indolence was too good to last 

— Nestlings 

PANZO'S'" Squash Team '81-'86 

Thanks Mom and Dad SEATON'S FOREVER-eh"? 

Motonzed Slurpee Trekker 





If you can't convince them, confuse them — Harry Truman 

A minority may be right; a majority is always wrong 

— Ibsen 

The power which resides in a man is new in nature, and none 
but he knows what that is which he can do, nor does he know 
until he has tried — Emerson 

These were the best of times; these were the worst of times, it 
was an age of excellence, it was an age of foolishness 

Co-Author PH-PE Theory 
Motorized Slurpee Trekker 

Thanks Mom and Dad 



First Football '85 Second Football '84 

West Side Story (Shrank) '86 Seaton's 1st Fiat 

P.T. Boat 

HOLY GIZMO 1 -Wincked 1 -What iiis this' -B-Man' 

Ca fourres-tu en masse 7 -How's it goin' Cutie-Re 9 

The Fridge. Shrimpy L M R, Hardcore-in-between's 

Vive Les Mangeuses! Soon-to-be. Maxi, E K , Allison's, Mini, et 

toutes les autres B J EVERYDAY! 

Life is a road, and on this road, you get many flat tires, so .1 


degueule sur la tienne' — Batt '85 

You might not believe this, MY DEAR, but I'm the AUTHOR 




•81- - 86 

Maturity is a bitter disappointment for which there is no 
remedy, unless laughter can be said to remedy anything 

— Kurt Vonnegut Jr 

The beauty of the world has two edges — one of laughter, one 
of anguish — cutting the heart asunder — Virginia Woolf 

The energy of a dream is its romantic expectation The actuality 
of a dream is merely its appearance. — Anonymous 

Old Time Or No Time" 
180 Splat 

Thank you mum, dad. 
Jennifer. Dorothy, and Launce 

Alpine Skiing '85-'86 

Cycling 'SB-^ 

Sailing '85 

Track '83-'85 

Band '82-'85 




We shall not cease from exploration 
And the end of all our exploring 
Will be to amve where we started 
And know the place for the first lime 

- T S E [CL) 

The purring of the invisible antennae 

Is both stimulating and 


— Ezra Pound 

In the morning. 
In the evening. 
Ain't we got fun- 

USSR 1986 

Thanks Bob & Sa 

Quetico 1983 

Ann those dinners 





Special thanks to the Gareaus, Vinney and my Family 

I have been reading your column for years and never thought 
that your letters were true But I recently had an experience that 
changed my mind I had iust graduated from a small liberal arts 
college in Canada It all started one day in the back of my red 
truck... — Name and Address Witheld 

Weebles wobble but they don't fall down 1 
It is impossible to say just what I mean 1 

It's been a very large blast! 

Buck and Vinme 81-*86 


, 84- , 86 

My head fills like a junk shop 

•In desperate need of repair 

The path of least resistance leads to the 

Garbage Heap of Despair 
1 think I better get back in bed — the the 

I've walked along a dark highway and wighed that I was in one 
of the cars speeding by 1 have been in one of those speeding 
cars and wished I was walking But never I spent an hour with 
my friends and wished I hadn't, 

Movies with Marti Learning to study Val's way Who was my 
roommate last year anyway 9 All that Jazz Missed ya Johnnies. 
LRI. Doc. Rico. Demmer & Wardo 

Football Inmates "85 Seaton's 

Hockey New York '85 Hay's 

Rugby Boston '85 F.L W '86 

Soccer Pseudo Hockey '86 143JA 



Backup Vocals: V. Rao, B. Girgrah 

Acoustic Guitars: T. Simko, D. Quinn 

Synth: P. Boucher 

Lead Vocals: Mr. D. Brooks, C. 


Drums: A. Prusin 

Electric Guitar: P. Hazlett 

Keyboard: S. Chuang 

Roadies: C. Chan, G. Mann (standing in 

for B. Conacher as a human being) 

You've all heard about the unique spirit in the boarding Houses, 
the friendships created and the feeling of living in a large family. All 
that sounds very nice but here's the real story, the untold truth: 
Imagine fifty-five different boys of several different backgrounds 
from ages fourteen to nineteen living under the same roof and 
having to put up with each other's habits, music tastes, unmade 
beds and soiled clothes... Now, imagine those same fifty-five boys 
waking up in the morning and heading for the showers, then hitting 
the 4' x 5' toast room, or crowding out the visitor's room to read 
"the" paper... 

Now you get a good idea of why the boarding experience is so - 

The result, however, is a closely knit group of individuals who 
develop among themselves indelible bonds of friendship, who live 
together and share both good times and not so good times. 

The 1985-86 edition of Weed's has certainly been characterized 
by its incredibly vivid House spirit and constant effort to achieve the 
best. The House was led by eleven grade thirteens who provided 
incomparable leadership in all aspects of boarding life. They were 
definitely laid back, but could become "firm" in times of need. 

One of our greatest strengths this year was our squad of new boys 
who were extremely dynamic and enthusiastic. They were a very 
appreciated addition to Wedd's and will certainly contribute in 
ensuring the continuation of the dynasty. 

Our most remarkable achievements this year were the House 
Soccer and House Tennis championships, as well as the Prefect's 
Cup (the third in four years) with which we literally flew away. 

A great deal of the credit goes to Mr. Brooks, a man who never 
gave up... until the situation looked hopeless. Many thanks are also 
extended to Mrs. Leigh, Mr. Slemon, Mr. Badali, and Mr. MacKay 
for their tireless support of the house. Thanks also to the UP 
CHUCK club and its honourary members. Finally, thanks everyone 
for a great year and best of luck in '86-'87. 





Teardrops turn to children w 


never had the lime 

To commit the sins they pay 


through another's evil mind 

- Paul Weller 

Why should the fruit be held 

infenor to the flower' 

— Anonymous 

Boston '82 

Geo "85 

2nd Hockey '83 

Florida Nov 2-11 '85 

Infirm Club '83-'84 

President U C Club 

The horror' The horror' 

- Joe Cobb '84-" 



, 84- , 86 


No one will ever make me believe that I think all the time. 

— Voltaire 
Tout vient a point a qui sait attendre. — Anonyme 

Le beau est aussi utile que lutile Plus peut-etre. 

— Victor Hugo 
Que sais-je? — Montaigne 

Something attempted, something done — Longfellow 

First Hockey '84-86 Vive "de" French Connection 

First Football '85 Pride on the Line 

Great times, fantastic memories . The Bart YSD 

Buffalo Thanks Mr B and Wedd's 13's. D K . Mon Beau Viv.. 

Thank you all for your support in two great years Thanks mom 

for making it possible 


- 82-'86 


Man turns his back on his 


Long live the 

Well he |ust ain't no good 

— Springsteen 

Basketball '84-86 

I'll take today 

Captain '86 

You take tomorrow 

Volleyball 83-86 


Captain & MVP '86 


Geo '85 Elpat '8S-'86 

- Wilcox 

UCCLUB - Vice Pres (6| 

Thanks Wedd's 

Thank you. goodnight now 



I've make my mind up. I can take it 
I'll be fine even if 1 got to fake it 
I'll keep surviving 

- Wedd's 


Be Yourself Tonight' 

- AL&DS 

I've gone crazy again — that's what life 


i dread tomorrow The thought of it is makin 

here does to 

3 me rather ill 

it's time to go home " 


Thanx to Mom. Dad. JD. PW. MA. GMA. Viv, Pru. Shtoo. 

Bouch Coaches Poon, Badali. MacKay. Procunier. Brooks. 

Slemon Special thanks to a certain Crystal in Kingston'! 

Flish/Flesh/Flisk/Oooit/I nouied you/Shtoo/Who/Bee/Boo/ 

Butt/Yank/Y S D /DJ's/ 

USSR 84.T.T.F.W 

AUSTRIA '85. (joined the U.C.C ). I S F T 

B S.C '86. Yetti. Yoggi Thanks 



The chocolate thunder flying, 
robinzine crying, teeth shaking, 
glass breaking, rump roasting, 
bun toasting, wham, bam, 
I am JAM 

They think they taunt you 
But if you can stand the test 
You know your worst is better 
Than their best 

First Basketball '85-*86 

First Volleyball '82-'84 

Montreal & Syracuse Hoops 

Austria '85 - IS FT 

Thanks Mom, Dad, & Mr Brooks 


■ Darryl Dawkir 

- HL 


You just say LA 


Who be boo! 



A little rebellion now and then is a good thing — TJ 

There is one thing in the world worse than being talked about, 
and that is not being talked about — Oscar Wilde 

1 make myself laugh at everything in case I should have to 
weep — Beaumarchais 

Those that drink beer will think beer. 
Time brings everything 

W Irving 
- Plato 

LABTUD EL PAT Algebra=666 Tres Laahed YANK 
Fourrer en masse Schoon me'. Initiated into the U.C.C of 
U.C C Great White North? Where are the igloos? OTTAWA- 
GrounderCummerFruiterQumnerBillyBob The Lido Who 
be Pru Shtoo Boo and Haz? 




If my theory of relativity is proven correct, Germany will claim 
me as a German and France will declare me a citizen of the 
world Should my theory be disproved, France will declare me 
a German and Germany will insist that I am a Jew 

— Einstein 

Scimus te prae litteras fatuum esse 

— Petronii 

First Basketball '84-'86 (Captain) Montreal x2 

First Volleyball '85 Syracuse '86 Vancouver '84 

You owe me a WHAT THE HELL? SHTOO' 

Thanks to Mom & Dad, GMA, Wedds. DB, BB. Coaches. 
Chuck, Pru, Haz, Spaz, Bouche. Moo, Mrs C 


; JN^ 



Honesty is the best political platform 

If we don't solve our problems, other people will — and the 
world of tomorrow belongs to the people who will solve 

— Pierre Trudeau 









I've got photographic memory — it just takes a little time to 
develop — Me {I think) 

You know how time fades away 


1 still don't know what I was waiting for and my time was run- 
ning wild A million dead-end streets, and everytime I thought 
I'd got it made, it seemed the taste was not so sweet So [turned 
myself to face me But I've never caught a glimpse of how the 
others must see the faker I'm much too fast to take that 

Don't let me hear you say life's taking you nowhere, angel 
Come get up. my baby Look at that sky: life's begun.. 

1 wish those days could 
come back once more 
Why did those days 
Ever have to go 
Cause I loved them so 

Here's to Montreal 

Stevie Wonder '76 

We can be heroes — just for one day 
Just watch me now 

Deep in the human unconscious is a persuasive need for a logi- 
cal universe that makes sense But the real universe is always 
one step beyond logic — J. Herbert 

When the night has come 
And the land is dark 
And the moon is the only light we'll see, 
I won't be afraid 
Just as long as you stand by me — The Drifters 

This is not the end It is not even the beginning of the end But it 
is perhaps the end of the beginning — W Churchill 

2nd Cricket '83 Mem. of U C Club 

**• Thanks Mom and Dad 1 *"" 

David Bowie 


SURVIVORS 1975-1986 

L to R: Trevor Farrow, 
Andrew Heintzman, Doug 
Deeks, Dominic Rodrigues, 
Brian Sharwood, Bill 
Chalmers, Mrs. M. Mardail, 
Ian Pringle. 

Absent: Tim Hore, Bill 
Plaxton, Simon Horner. 


David Rose 

Christopher Logue 

Adam Rasky 

Phillip Goetz 



David Hannah 

Toffer Windslow 



Front Row: T.P.O'D Bredin, T.M. Adamson, R.H. Sadleir, J.N. Symons, D. Payne. 

Second Row: M.F. Miller, D.S. Overholt, R.S. Montgomery, CD. Lowndes, PD. Midge, J.E.R. Barter. 

Third Row: N.E. Mens, PW. Bennett, J.W. Benoit, K. Fleming, W.H. Elcock. 

Fourth Row: N.G. Barber, M.H. Webb, A.D. Turner, Mrs. M-M. Lowndes, E. Moore. RE. Morrow, B.K. Adams. 

Fifth Row: I. Sadler, B.J. Briglio, R.S. Coleman, R.A. Mee, J.F. Eix, R. Kuzniak. 

Sixth Row: J. Procunier, I.D. Monroe, R.W.D. Tompkins. V. Barillaro, PG. Crysler, D. Matthews, J. Matthews. 

Back Row: D. Poon, R. Hood, J.R. Mackay, B.J.P Badali, D.W.Slemon. 

Absent: J.M. Agnew, M.J. Newnham, J.D. Blakey, M. Spence. 




Back Row L to R: Mr. K. Daniels, Mr. A. Maclsaac, Mr. G. Keene, Mr. W. Heckbert. 

2nd Row: Mr. P. Gillis, Mr. F. Phair, Mr. O. Coseni. 

Front Row: Mr. L. Wong, Mr. J. Perez, Mrs. T. Perez, Mr. K.G. O'Brien. 



Mr. B. MacKay and Mrs. K. Monahan 
Absent: Mrs. H. Nobbs, Dr. S. Smart. 

jt % warn 'fm ' \3 

L to R: Miss C. Cambell, MS. B. Disher, Miss A. Graham, 
Miss B. Allan. 

Absent: Mr. B. Coates 



Mr. Alasdair Wight 

by Mr. Ross Morrow 

The College has been most fortunate to enjoy the vigour, 
enthusiasm and talents of Alasdair Wight, an immensely cheery 
flaming redhead, who has spent two terms among us as a tutor of 
Mathematics and Physics. A graduate of the Glasgow Academy, 
Alasdair will proceed to Trinity College, Cambridge, in the Fall to 
study pure Mathematics. While at UCC he has busied himself with a 
wide range of activities including singing in the choir, participating 
in the senior theatre workshop, assisting Mr. Bredin with the skiing 
programme and coaching and playing rugby. He has somehow 
managed to find the time as well to take French classes with Mr. 
Barillaro and cooking classes outside the College, he has also com- 
pleted the requirements for the Bronze Medallion in his spare 

The College is most appreciative of Alasdair's energy and posi- 
tive approach to the incredible demands on his time; his sunny dis- 
position and lively wit have provided considerable pleasure to 
students and faculty alike. May he flourish at Cambridge where his 
studies may lead him to consider a career in teaching. 

Mr. O'Brien 


by Tina Perez 

Mr. Keith O'Brien has decided to leave the College at the end of 
this term as Director of Physical Plant. The news came as quite a 
surprise to the school, especially to his devoted staff. 

Mr. O'Brien came to the school in March of 1976, and the 
knowledge that he acquired in the heavy equipment field and his 
own business as a Contractor benefited the school greatly. 

During his dedicated 10 1/2 years with the College, he has not 
only upgraded the school in many aspects but has supervised many 
large projects. To mention a few: New Heating Boilers, Upper 
School Science and Computer Labs, Prep. Science and Computer 
Labs, Masters' Change Rooms Upper and Prep. School, Prep. 
Music Rooms, Cricket Pavillion and many more. 

He will be missed by the College but mostly by his own staff. He 
was a great boss to work for and he generated that team spirit 

We wish him every success in any future endeavor. 






The College Times would like to thank all 

the advertisers for their generosity and 

their continued support of a tradition. 

flUlMERUn/ — 



Best Wishes 

"J^coo Camp 

An Independent Camp for Boys 

Ages nine to sixteen, situated in 

the Highlands of Haliburton. 

Lister Public Relations Limited 

Specialists in Marketing and 
Corporate Communications 

124 Merton Street, Toronto, M4S 2Z2 Telephone 485-5223 


■MaMaMiMaWiMiMiftjWiMaMaMa Li 1 

khhhuwr "a A'-* -"a\ a"' %%% ** * 


AW ■?• 



JiOitiOiTlinJi X" ^\t Itmnrntltltltltltltm 

'■"■"■r\ani"inini"ink vW '■»• jAa^AaAa'iWiWi* 

Well make a world of difference to your international finance. 

The Midland Bank Group is one of the Branch in New York. 

fil^ „ .iXJL.iKiT (if it'* }[mnml\itktktitt ... .,!■ 

KiniHiKiKiniKi' ilk* g > * ,f ^AaAiAaAaJUKnAaA 

ill; %HJ(illinaninL ,JL ^iAini" S% 


■*■ nilinan«nini?\k 

A.A k iiAiKilliniAini^ Wini"* 

ffsrasi iskk w"K& . 

1U1L 4*i*s*i*i*i^iA B 


KiAa AiAi a. Ai Aitila^i*i"i"i«i"i"i"i" "»*■"■"■"»"■ 


major banking and finance organisations in 
the world. 

Midland Bank Canada is a vital part of 
that international network. 

With Group assets in excess of 
Can. $100 billion. With our correspondent 

At Midland Bank Canada you have 
corporate finance and lending, foreign exchange 
and money market activities, fast international 
money transfers plus the Group's facilities 

Talk direct to our experienced Canadian 

banking network in over 200 countries. With senior management team in Toronto or Calgary. 

major operations in Asia, Europe, Australia 

The combined resources of the Midland 

and the Middle East — and in the USA through Group add up to a range of services comparable 

Crocker National Bank, and with a full 

to any other bank -anywhere. 

Midland Bank Canada 


P0 Box 41 1, Exchange Tower, 2 First Canadian Place, Toronto, Ontario M5X 1E3 Tel. no: (416) 362-1551. 
Also at Suite 1310, Sun Life Plaza, 144 4th Avenue Southwest, Calgary, Alberta T2P 3N4 Tel. no: (403) 234-9857. 


Where traditional 
is always in style 

on the 

for all your 
banking needs. 





TOBY HULL "45-51" 
DAVID HULL "66-76" 







Royal Bank Plaza, South Tower, 
28th Floor, P.O. Box I26, 
Toronto, Ontario. M5J 2J3 

(4I6) 8650I3I 

General Insurance Brokers, Risk Management Consultants, 

Employee Benefit Plan Design, Group Insurance Programs, 

Pension Plan Consultants, Administrators, Actuarial Services, 

Executive Compensation, Estate Planning, Life Insurance, Annuities. 





"The development of 

desirable traits and 

characteristics - that intangible 

something which we style 

personality - is the 
chief work of the school" 

Dr. Frank Cody 





Dynamic Funds Management Ltd, 

with the compliments of 


360 EVANS AVE. - P.O. BOX 36 - TORONTO, ONT. M8Z 5M9 


of Canada would like to 
congratulate the gradu- 
ating class, students, 
and staff of Upper 
Canada College on the 
completion of another 
successful year. 


Kjjhn graphic services inc. 

421 eglinton avenue west 
toronto, Canada (416) 488-0849 







' HI 1 




••'"' ' 

1 ' "ill 




111'' 1 

f 4 m 



! U 






All the best., 



2665 Yonge Street, Toronto. 485-161 1 


for the finest in Building Materials 











Best Wishes 5rom The Staff at... 

TELEPHONE (416) 243-3132 ^ 








National Bank Building 
150 York Street 
Suite 1300 
Toronto, M5A 3S5 

Toronto North 
75 The Donway West 
Suite 1414 
Toronto, M3C 2G2 

Toronto West 
190 Attwell Drive 
Suite 308 

Rexdale, M9W 6H8 



Good Luck 
Grads of '86 


Magnum & Magnum Plus 
Sunglasses from Imperial Optical 




Why Choosing Us 

Could Be^ibur Most Important 

Investment Decision 

Because of our highly personalized 
service you'll find us easy to talk to. 
And, with our broad resources, you 11 
get outstanding investment advice. 

Choosing us could be your most important investment decision. 

(DSP) Dominion Securities Pitfield 

covers business like 
Canadian Business 

Practical advice, expert 
analysis and fascinating 
profiles of the enterpris- 
ing personalities behind 
the deals, the successes 
and the disasters that 
make the news. You get 
it all every month in 
Canadian Business. 

Can adian 


To start your subscription, 
call 1 -800-268-9696 or write to 
Canadian Business, 
70 The Esplanade, 2nd Floor, 
Toronto. Ontario M5E 1 R2. 


Come toTftror 
Financial Centre. 



A Division of National Victoria and Grey Trustco 

Member Canada Deposit Insurance Corporation 






It probably costs less 
than you think to travel 
in luxury and 

....arrive in style with 


Affordably priced, chauffeur-driven limousines 

for all occasions. 

*—— ~ A "All Canada Toll Free 

677-9444 1 -800-268-4967" 




Connor Clark 

20 Queen Street West Suite 2812 
Box 43, Toronto, Ontario M5H 3R3 


We've been 


Upper Canada College 

on time 

for 27 years. 

May your 

future go like 



The Foundation Company of Canada 

The Jackson-Lewis Company Limited, a Foundation company, 

built U.C.C.'s clock tower in 1959, as well as the main building, 

laboratories and library. 


Upper Canada College /959 

Summer Programmes for Students 

Credit Programmes 

Cours d'Ete a Nice 
Grades 11,12 and 1 3 credit courses in French language on 
the beautiful Riviera. Excursions to Monaco, Florence, 
Cannes and Paris. 

Cours d'Ete a Bayonne 

Grade 11/12 credit course in French language on the 
Atlantic coast. Excursions to Lourdes, Bordeaux, Madrid 
and Paris. 

Cours d'Ete en Suisse 
Grade 1 3 credit course in French language on Lake Geneva 
near Lausanne. Excursions to Strasbourg, Geneva and 

Art & Language School in Italy 
Grades 11,12 and 1 3 credit courses in painting, etching, art 
history and Italian language in Siena near Florence. 
Excursions to Florence, Venice, Rome, Assisi and San 

Non Credit Programmes 
The Biking Tour of Europe 

Let small country roads become your path-way to Europe as 
you discover the wonders of Munich, Zurich, Rome, 
Florence, Venice, Zermatt, Paris, London and much 

Matchpoint Quebec 
Tennis camp for juniors (11 to 16 yrs.) at beautiful Gray 
Rocks in the Laurentians. Six hours of Tennis daily as well 
as windsurfing, sailing, swimming, canoeing, golf and 

Swiss Mountain Adventure 

An outdoor programme of hiking, skiing and climbing in the 
mountains of central Switzerland for juniors (11-16 yrs.) 

For free brochures please call or write: 

Butterfield & Robinson 

70 Bond Street 

Suite 300 

Toronto, M5B 1X3 

Telephone: 864-1354 





to the graduating class of 1986 

With all good wishes. 



serving travellers since 1955 

187 Highbourne Avenue (Avenue Road & Eglinton), Toronto 


Virginia Prins 




Appointed travel agent to The Experiment in International Living of Canada 
(estab. 1932) specializing in international educational exchanges 



Gluskin, Sheff & Associates Inc. 

Suite 2014, Box 78, 20 Queen Street West 

Toronto, Canada M5H 3R3 

Telephone: (416) 977-6666