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Full text of "The English metropolis; or, London in the year 1820. [by J.Corry]."

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THE 



ISngli0lb MttvopMn; 

OR, 

LONDON IN THE YEAR 1820. 

CONTAINING 

SATIRICAL STRICTURES 

OH 

PUBUC MANNERS, MORALS, AND AMUSEMENTS; 

fl Ipomig <IDntti[tman'0 smmmm \ 

AND 

CHARACTERISTIC ANECDOTES OF SEVERAL EMINENT INDIVIDVALS 

WHO NOW FIGUllE IN THIS GREAT THEATRE OF 

TEMPOflARY EXHIBITION. 



AUTHOR OF A SATIRICAL VIEW OF LONDON. 



'< HooMss, chmcbes, niixt tofcttier. 
Streets unpteUMit in all weather{ ^ 
Oaady thinft eno^gli to tempt ye, ^ 
Showy oatifdes, intidee eapty; 
Lawyen, poets, priests, pbyslei)UM» 
Noble, sinple, all conditioas; 
Women, black, red, foir, and grey, 
Pmdes, and snch as never pray ; 
Many a bean without a shUlinf , 
Many a widow not unwilling; 
Many a bargain if y^a striiie it: 
This is London— how d'ye like itP 



PHntetf hy Bamard and Farley ; 

AND. SOLD BY SHERWOOD, NEELY, AND JONES, 

PATERNOSTER-ROfr. 



{ 



1820. 

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H^tiicamti* 



RIGHT HONOURABLE GEORGE HARRY GREY, • 



STAMFORD AND WARRINGTON, 

AND L0RS-L1EUTKIIANT QF CHBtHIRE. 



My Lord, 

Your, permission to inscribe this 

Work to your Lordship is truly gratifying 

to me, while it affords me an opportunity 

thus publicly to express my gratitude, for 

your benignity, and munificent patromage. 

Equally prized by the virthous part of the 

community, for your genuine patriotism, 

and your unostentatious Uberality as the 

patron of several public institutions; and 

esteemed by your friends, for those social 

A 2 • 



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IV DEDICATION. 

virtues ;>thich render Nobility still mftre 
illustrious : may your Lordship long con- 
tinue, one of the omamaits of that superb 
" Corinthuffi Column^'' which adorns, while 
it liupports the national edifice. 

I remain, 

My Lord, 

Your Lordship's grateful, 

and most obedient Senrai^t^ 

JOHN CORRY. 

Lonianf March 1, 1820. 



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conti:nts. 



A BRiEP Description of Londoo • ■ 7 

Ro)ra! Palaces , 23 

Public Commercial Buildings •••••••• 25 

Public OflSces 27 

The River Thames and its six magnificent Bridges • • • . 29 
General Observations on the various Glasses of the In- 
habitants of London ••••••••••••••••••• 33 

Characteristics of the People of London, Westminster, 

and Southwark*. •••••••••« •• 51 

Sketches of Public Characters * • • « • 69 

Simplicity and Refinement • • • • • ^« •••••• 75 

Quackery •••••••••• ••••••••• 79 

A Young Gentleman's Adventures in London •••••••• 81 

The Literary Dissectors ••••• .•• 129 

Hints to Masqueraders .4 • • 149 

Instructions in the Art of Polite Censure . . • • • 164 

The Art of Puffing 178 

Modem Poets— Scott, Lord Byron, Southey • 179 

The Edinburgh Reviewers •«•«•• 190 

The General Election ; or, John Bull in bis Glory . • • « 193 

Satirical Strictures on Modem Education • • • • 206 

Modern Manners .«•••••••.: • 211 

A Mother's Letter to her Son 225 

Free Strictures on En^ish Literature • • 241 

Scotch Romances •••••• • 255 



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/ 



fi CONTENTS. 

MAC 

Hie Philosopber't Stone discovered in Edinburgh* • • • • 267 

Modem Refiewers,... •• ••»»••• «• 2G6 

English Newspapers 273 

The Fine Arts •• 278 

Public Amusements • •• 285 

Appendix ...• • ...•• • 309 



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THE 



ENGLISH METROPOLIS, 



0E« 



LONDON IN THE YEAR 1830. 



A BRIEF BE^CRIPTION OF I.ONBON. 

All the researches of our antiquaries have 
failed to discover the precise time wh^i London 
was founded. Some authors trace its origin to 
the Aborigines, whom they estert were Goths^ 
who settled in Britain long before this island was 
invaded by the Romans. Even the etymology of 
this city is attributed to those settlers, in whose 
language lun signified a grove, and den a town, 
or the town in the wood : other writers derive 
its name from the language of the ancient Bri* 
tons, in whidi leyn is a lake, and din ^ town, or 
ihe town on the lake; but it must be evident 
to fommon sense, that both these conjectures are 
arbitrary, vague, and unsatisfactory. 

The first historical account of London is that 
recorded by the Romans, whose common prac- 



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9 THE ENGUSH METROPOUS J 

tice it was to give new names to the places 
which they conquered. They first called this 
city Londinum, and afterwards Augusta. Lon-» 
don is mentioned by Tacitus as a place of some 
importance in the iftrst century ^ . •« Suietaruiiii»/* 
says he, ** marched through the country as far 
as London, a place not dignified with the name 
of a colony^ b^t.tlie^chief residence, of merchants, 
and the great mart of trade and commerce.'^ 

Among the few remains of antiquity in this 
city, may be mentioned London Stone, near St. 
Swithin's church, in Cannon-street. It is sup^ 
posed to have been tbeMilliarium of the Romans, 
ffo/sk whieh tjb^iy inea^ured diiptaa<;ea tp Ih^ 
^teitiQQl i».Briiajo» Wadiifig^street wan one <tf 
tbet Roman miUtary ways, an4 QW^rei^t ^mh-* 
other., Tht 6rrt'«re^i0nQf;tbe.3^^l¥ef^.'LoB-> 
dcm wan asi^ribedi lo^ JuUns fCfa^s^fi' by Fit9<' 
Stephen, an histornm iDf ve^y dooNfol ^(l^tyj 
but it iacertatn that WtUiam I. ereoted a..lbrti!e49 
pn the present s^te of the Tower^ to overawe hit 
new subjects, thd citieeoB ot Lobdim* West* 
minster Abbey M^as built by King Edgar^ in 
the year 958, and Westtninster HaU by WiUiam 
11., about the latter eiid of .the ekvonriak ^ c^ii* 
tury . Some rem wis. of the religious boqfie$ wp 
pressed by Hency YIU. are to be found in. the 
city, birt they are inconsiderable,, and neglected. 
* This great metobpoUs hw undonbtedly exirtid 



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.OR» U>NBON IK 1820. 9 

Bearly two tfaouaand years, and has undergone 
OMUiy mediorable Tioissitudet since the huts of 
ifae Aborigines, and the more convenient tnan^ 
stom of the anoieni Romaiis, were erected oil 
the northern bank of the Thames. At the pre^ 
sent moment, London is the most interesting 
spot on the habitable globe, whether considered 
as the nursery of arts, the centre of European 
commerce, tb? seat of the legislature^ or the 
abode of a v«Mit population* According to the 
computation of a living author, this world is in- 
habited by ona thousand millions of human 
beings:' of these London contains about one 
millioiH or a thousacHlth partof the population of 
the earth ; and in what other comnouaity are 
such numerous and comibrtable accomniodationa 
attatnabte, so much general knowledge, and so 
steady and ujaiilterrupted an enjoyment of social 
happiness, secured and protected by the wise and 
inipiirtia) administration of eijuitable laws ? Aa 
far as regj^ds the human person and character, 
LoodoQ preDents.an aidless diversity to the ob* 
^rvant 4^ye, from the glossy sable of the Africani 
to the perfect blooei of £lnglish femininia beauty ; 
9nd from the imperfection of the misshapen 
diMaltf^ .Dikhi' to be met with in the city, to the 
elbgmit aymmetry and mfi^estic stature of the 
QMidyft :fei»« In meatal endowments smd ac- 
qtrirements^ too^ a aMst iwkr^ing gra^ttion ia 



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10 THE ENGUSH METROPOIiTS J 

frequently perceptible in this metropolis, from 
the rustic simplicity and innocence of the vilhi^e 
maid just arrived at her first place in town, to 
the beauty, grace, and refinement of the yoong 
lady. 



• Adorn'd 



With all that earth and heaven can hestow 
To make her amiable 3" 

and the gradual developement of mind, from the 
plain good sense of the industrious handicraftsman, 
intent upon earning his daily bread, up to the 
aspirations of the sagacious statesman, thesuc-* 
ces^ful researches of the experimental philo* 
sopfaer, and the inventive energy of the man of 
elevated imagination, who shines as a musical 
composer, an artist, or an author. 

But while the city, as it is significantly called, 
is thronged with merchants, tradesmen^ and the 
subordinate classes of society to wfa6m th^ give 
employment ; while the pleased rambler views 
alternately numerous warehouses stored with va« 
luable merchandise, and shops overflowing with 
the most choice and elegant, as well as useftil; 
productions of nature and art; or gratifies the 
imagination with a glance at those magnificent 
edifices which adorn the eastern division of the 
metropolis, the western part is not without ob- 
jects of equal, or, perhaps, still greater attraction: 

Westminster bas^for many centuries been disr 



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OR, liONBON IN 1820; 11 

ttog^sbed as the seat of gOTerament. It con- 
tains the edifice appropriated to the purposes of 
legislation^ and the courts of law. It is also the 
principal residence of the nobility and gentry 
of the United Kingdom, who coofie to town about ^ 
the end of autumn, and usually spend the winter 
here, except during the Christmas holidays, when 
many of them revisit their country seats, for the 
purposes of festivity, hospitality, and that noblt 
munificence which they annually exercise by the 
distrilmtion of clothing, fuel, provisions, and 
money, among their indigent neighbours. 

The presence of some thousands of our opulent 
nobility, gentry, and merchants, in the west end 
of the town, operates as a powerful attractive to 
ingenious and aspiring individuals, who crowd 
thither to share the animating influence <if wealthy 
patronage. Hence the mansions of the great 
are furnished with elegance and splendour be«^ 
yond the power of description ; arid the drawing-* * 
room, and the assembly, display those polished 
circles where social parties with the freedom and 
propriety of polite manners, enjoy the delights 
of music, dancing, luxurious refection, and the 
still higher gratification of friendly conversatic^. . 

London has for several ages been gradually 
enlarged with a steady progression, arising from 
prosperous commerce ; and its regular improve- 
ment has been the happy consequence of that 



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13 THE ENGLISH METROPOUS; 

iatellectual power and intelligencey for which the 
free mind is peculiarly pre-eminent* 6eni|Ll9» 
aided by wealth, has thus produced a city abound- 
ing with all the accommodations that man can 
require, or invention devise. The rapid improve- 
ment in the we'^tern part of the metropolis with- 
in the last fifty years, has been superior to that 
in any part of the world, with the exception, 
perhaps, of Liverpool. For many ag-es, itie uian- 
sions erected by several of the nobility in West*^ 
minster and its vicinUy, contributed essentially to 
the increase of this part of tl)e capital, both ia 
houses and population. Speculators purchased 
ground, marked out new streets and squares, and 
erected commodious and beautiful mansions* 
The salubrity of the place, the convenience of 
the leneaieuts, and the hope of patronage from 
the greaty soon induced tradesmen to occupy the 
new buildings; and numerous shops displayed 
the various merchandise of the mercer, the 'mil- 
liner, the embroiderer, the jeweller, the uphol- 
sterer, and all those trades which aid iu tlie eiii- 
bellisbment of a great city. . 

The erection of several modern edifices also 
contributed to the magi^iificence of London* 
Three new bridges acrc^s the Thames, in addi- 
tion to tbe three which bajd for ages been the 
boast of this city, ai once promoted the conre-; 
Qient intercourse of the public, and presetited 
1 



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OR, liONDOK IN 1820; 13 

noble objects to the observation pf natives and 
foreigfners. The new Custom House, erected on 
an extensive scale, is at once ornamental, and 
conducive to the success of commerce, by the flsu 
cility it affords to the man of business ; the church 
of Mary-le-bone, near the Kegent's Park, an 
ornamental edifice of stone ; and the new church 
of St. Pancras, another elegant structure, now 
nearly finished, constitute superb and durable or- 
naments to London. 

Such is the bright side of the picture of mo*- 
dem London j but many are the shades of hu- 
man folly and profligacy, with which it is inter* 
spersed. The English Metropolis has, indeed, 
often been a subject for the studied praise of 
those cunning and avaricious writers and pub- 
lishers, who extolled it at the expence of truth, 
for the purpose of obtaining a temporary popu- 
larity for their productions. They manufacture 
their encomiums as Peter Pindar's razor-seller 
made his instruments — '^ to sell/' Thus London 
has^ been repeatedly termed by them the greatest 
city in the world, the very source and centre of 
human ingenuity and happiness* The term great 
is certainly applicable to London, both as it re- 
gards the excellence and the vice of a multitu- 
dinous community. It is great in extent, popu- 
lation, commerce, opulence, the perfection and 
beauty of numberless articles manufactured for 



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14 THB ENGLISH METROPOLIS j 

the accommodation of man, and the embellish* 
ment of his habitation. But the vices indige- 
nous to London are also great — nay, enormpus : 
and so complicated is society, that virtue am) 
vice seem in Home iostances so blended as to be 
incapable of separation. 

Here, as a modem satirist too truly observes, 
^* Two gods divide the world, pleasure and gain/' 
The commercial residents in the eastern part of 
the capital, are particularly influenced by the love 
of money, while the majority of those who reside in 
the western division of this immense place, are evi« 
dently engaged in the pursuit of pleasure. Yet, 
if we may judge from the aspects, demeanour, 
and even the sentiments of such persons as come 
within the observation of sober reason, neither 
the man of business, nor the man of pleasure^ 
have yet discovered the true path to felicity. In 
both charstcters, self-love is the predominant 
passion ; and no human being wholly devoted to 
the mere gratification of the passions, appetites, 
imagination, or vanity, ever found true happi* 
ness. From the social and sympathetic biajs of 
the heart, which is never so delighted as when 
others share its joys, we feel that man was in* 
tended for society ; and that it is equally his 
dqty and his interest to promote all communica* 
ble and innocent pleasures to those around him, 
if he wishes to be happy himself* But in a vast 



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OK, I-ONDON IN 1820. 16 

and luxorioas city like London, all the finer sen* 
sibilities of our nature seem absorbed by affiecta* 
tion. Here we may observe an individual wbo 
can sigh or weep at the representation of ficti- 
tious distress on the stage, but who will not give 
sixpence to real misery in the street. Another is 
inspired with all the gaiety of Thalia, at a comedy, 
yet is as morose as a misanthrope at home. In« 
deed, London, like all other populous commu- 
nities, seems totally at variance with truth and 
nature : all thei delights and blandishments of so* 
ciety, when brought to the test of reason^ ap** 
pear to be merely an artificial and adroit accom^ 
modation of manners and sentiments to external 
circumstances; and love, friendship, nay religioo, 
are but secondary things, if placed in compa^ 
tition with the profits of trade, or even the most 
trivial entertainment which dierishes or gratifies 
self-love. 

The frauds of London have already been de» 
scribed with sufiicient minuteness by Colquhoun ; 
but the perpetrators of crime who now infest 
society seem characterized by peculiar despera* 
tion and obduracy; insomuch, that precocious 
villapy has reared its unblushing front at the 
public bar, and mere boys have been convicted 
of the high crimes of burglary and foot-pad rob- 
bery, formerly supposed to be practicable only 
by the most bold and desperate adventurers. 



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"^ 16 THfi £NGI«TSH MBTHOPOLIS J 

Forgery has also^ it appears^ been successfully 
practised by very fine young gentlemen; and 
swindling has stained the honour of beaux and 
heroes t Thus we are informed of " The sudden 
disappearance of a man of fashion, who has long 
taken the lead in the gay haunts at the west end 
of town. I^e held high rank in the army, and is 
an accomplished scholar. An unhappy predi- 
lection for play is the cause assigned for bk 
abrupt departure. Some of his friends are said 
to be under acceptances for a vtfry considerable 
«pm. All his tradesmen are left unpaid; and 
more f^an one hotel-keeper has. reason to bewail 
his loss. The fugitir^ has winged his flight td 
the continent. *'»~So much for the superior re^ 
iinement of modern swindling ! 
^ Our great moralist, Dr. Johnson, has but too 
truly called London ^< the needy villain's gene* 
ral home;'* and undoubtedly numerous adven- 
4uters, who have cheated their creditors in va- 
rious p^rts of the United Kingdom, seek shelter 
here. On the other faand^ thousands of estimable 
find amiable men and women, of every class in 
society, adorn this great city, contribute by their 
powers to its prosperity, and obtain the esteem of 
all who know them. 

The Engush Metropoi^is is situated in 
51 degrees, 31 minutes nprth latitude, and is .406 
miles south of Edinburgh, 270 miles south-east 



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of Dubliri^lliMli wesfliT'j&dirterdam, 035~nDrth-' 
Wtot dr']4ris/6^.northi-«a8t^orill^Kd^ 800 
noilh'Wesiof Soflo^e, 8^ iM^ilh-'west of<>Lisy>i)J 
500 soiUh^^est of Cop«hfa)i'gen/i1^^olutb-West' 
df Stockt)K/hii, 1,360 ntiitH-'west-of )Odi)s«tkntK 
Hople, l,'4li4 jibothcwfek ^ RtdstJoVr. " ' '' "" ^"'' 
Thii ireiit^iiieirdpo!i^''is sixty bailed. ^tel^ff 
from fehe^e^; }( is bdilt^iii'fhe batilLsfbf -tfie^rei^ 
Tkainea^ b 'ttboot ses^en itaffks'Sn Ifebgfib, 4!A«S»' 
^tet io>W^iA,' but of aharregtalar br^bi'ibiiitlg:'' 
in soibepSittM two tniles,-''in 1>tlj^' tlirfeei ^khil' at 
i!be bh>dd«i^'pari four ttllfea^. '' Itsr ffiriee'yiStihct^ 
M(i ittiHii&if)ai c}|fi$toM'^e,- tlie vit^'d€^i](!r^6ri; 
djte CTty! =trt" *Vlfestnlin8tien f^ittid '^ • b«§6fi^li' of 
Sbnlhw^W H^M««, witli>ffiei/%x^'ti^i?^ytil>l&bj^' 
.me^'^'st ipilce'^ more iW iwbiA^' tUi)4l^' dSH-' 
iadif@i*^«^.»''iEiondoii < aid!: msfiflihit^r^^^ ieO 
giiteffjf«rrihl''tfce northm >b';lak' dr tile^^iiiT^ 
aiid coV^rteVeralKim diT6t§ii^by'thy'^Ka.s$;h«» . 
Vari^tt<4f)'^efttlef9l6()^''i!ritf Vallifes •'MW^fc'hW^ 
viewed from Blackfrlir** l/ridge,^ J9<^1tifc|^ t6^ ^ 
A*-a«lilfirg^ feyk o# \he'si)«ftatW'4l'"tbsfc'liid ' • 
Mgtiifi«@ii\'^m^ttheati-e,' -d^^raCe^'Witff iitiit^iy ^ 

jSWpfllalRW?""""' * '^'^^'"'^ b'lil'.' .J, 3^T.;! t>r>'fi;:/«q 

T<k«ct>pdiB^ tJi'd' n«Mtetrf3i«bii^tali<M,'''H«^<iich',* 

lfo'«t«ev6niS 'fii«b^ qti^di<^m^^Ldi^'^i&yk^ff 

tb!ifcoritili^«OO0'^^^Kli^aHeyk;<li]i>(;6iiUk'; 

B 

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19 TH8 VKOi.i8« lOlTIIOIKk^IS; 

60 squajreij »b4 160,000 ||D«ue« am^ wfirfsboives. 
94)t t^i^pf^mg tQ tjbe Population Ketnrn of 
\9l}, fhyfi inetropolM then contt^i^ed 140,430. 
hpiw^i ::!pchA#)g thone boilding and ujunha^ 
hi^4;..^n^ siiQC^ tba|:pf^M there have been bat 
few new housf/i bniH* W ^% ^ r^al Aambtr iti 
BwM>*ly. «>f>f Wj>l» thw lAWOO. A pM>«r 
«*^W*smtJpi» hft^ ftwn tiw* to tnn?» b«W Pf^•. 
W^ pf j4ie pf^pi^t'MMii^ Itt the year 18!Q|1, 
th0 pqpnlaj^Qp of f^uidpp was ascertained to hk, 
&l^,OQO'f y^t $)ich w the denre to overeat thalk 
it w^8 iben a«s«rted to <sQpt»i<n at least one qaillioo. 
of inhabit^Mf. Tl)#tm«^trinl9U, aimowtedtp. 
ll,000*^^ jnclndk;^ s sp^c^pf fight miles roood 
8li ;paul>.^aM>f!|clriiV ^4 consvqvcntlj oonpf^ia- 
mg, th^ ii»h;^i^(^^f,9( i^veral towii» and yillag«a» 
oear,]^ ipetrogQl^} yet thui aqople reljam di4 
npt «»tMfy tboiffi m^nlUpli^ 9f ma^^iDd, mhfi !«» 
w«K ctad|r to awi^, yeificity to ,v<|Dity« for- 

l^st V^AOfOOO hoAHW b^ipg«, . < 

Th(9 RriQcip^ fftr^t^ Iff iipodoq ar(? irif^fc?,: aj»4t 
^eUp^Vt^ jnJ^l^^l^wiUhi f^ broad f|[H)^TW^y;9^ 
^Vraiis^Abtjr^ th^ ^^i^^nW,^ for th«»fi»l* 
%pd. j>pQotii^fOp4fi|tif ft qg gfi^f9|rf)r«, 9wwU^ thft 
pavement large arched sewers comn)ttnifPf||« vitjilk 
the hpusf^ b3;,j$fnAMei;Homef>i with/ the iUreot. by 
«[Qall ope^gs^ co^mi^ With iron. gra^i^g> W^. 
wjt|).M^ Th^i^i^ wji^C9i^hat«9' cai^htp^^ 



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^leaalibcssialiand health of the itihaUtants of tbis 
pofMUaus .place. The bouses ^oq eaeb side of 
tbiesei filrciets arelofty^apacious^aml cosiinodioiis^ 
gederaUy four stdries high^ and ohtefly ocM^pted 
by tradesoieii, whose shops present the hmisI 
beaoUM ^^d perfect productions of nature and 
avt^iw ^he general aceotnaAodatton of man^ 
There aife two extensive fines of oominercial 
stfieets ffiom east to w^othe principal 6( mhuk 
^begins at Mile End, and thenee through Wbite4 
chapel, jydgate, Leadenhatlnstreet, Cornfaitl^ 
Cbeapside, St Pkiurs Cbweh-yard, Ludgat^ 
km^ mt&t^m^, the Stmnd, Fall Mali, St 
JtaqiesVgtraet, ^tid Piccadilly, to the southern 
sidsof Hyde ]^attk. Bot besides these tmrnerons 
ttot^^HMifiies of ttierichandise, there are sAi^o many 
tiidHstuhd fKbopS' in Yariotis directioniS ; and Wfaere"- 
8bevc» llm mmMbr moves, new and attractite 
cAbfeets^ 'lk)ttV airitnate and inattimate, alfferd a 
ft^rp^ttal Wi-ieCjr for Ifte gmtification of thi; most 
eurions^^Adv The genetal appearance of tlik 
]|MteiiLl|Q[tydnrdt5B is ikht of neatness, aind the 
aifiple^tfi^pli^dr wa«er a^rded by the'Tlfames 
and JNew Rl^r #ater*iH>rks, are ^ssehtia!ly con- 
ducive to the health and comfort itf'Aie inha- 
bitants. 

Among, the odii^ which i4J>Wtl|i* metropo- 
lis, St. Paul's Cl)iiiw|huisi:£bA. mMt* a^gm^cent. 
It is situated Btai^ 4iMi iieftiieM • bsn^ of the 

b2 



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20 THE ENGIJSH MWrBOPOMS; 

Thames^ . and when ^viewed from Blackfriar^f 
bridge ia the yiciBtty, {]|resents ooeof ^e.Ji^blest 
prDamentftiof auperb^iarchitectuneevecbeheU 1^ 
the hutnati e)(e. This . beautiful, onthedral i» 
buikof Portland stoae, iathe form<of a oros9, 
adorned in the central part by a lofty dome^ on 
the sutnmit of whieh is a li^ht and elegant laft* 
tem» ornamented with; jQorinthian eohimnss and 
surrounded by a balcoj^^. The l^Uern sup* 
ports a gilded globe, which is surmounted by a 
cross. The interior lengUi of the e4ific^iis 500 
feet, th^ breadth 250^ the height to the top of 
the cm^R is 500,, ai^d the circumference 4 2^992 
feet. This cathedral is A^^^Bod by thr^e pa£r 
ticos:^the western is the. principal, and consists 
of twelve stately fluted Corinthiiap cplumn^^ over 
which eigbt composite columns support a graod 
pediment ^nsculptured with: the, history pf 3t 
Fa)[il's .<^nversioi;^ beautifully ei^ectH^ in ba^so- 
relievo. But it is impQssp>le ;t9 convey by .wor4$ 
9 distinct idea, of th^ general ^agnjficeii^efof the 
noblest Frqtestant ^hurcb in the world,, th^ irery 
appearfince of which instantly bripg^ to the re- 
collection., pf the .majri. of tastej th^/des^tiptiv^ 
lines, of Pope : , ;; ...- ,.; ,. „ 

When we view some well-proportioii'd dome, ' 

The'wortd^s jutt wctoder,^nd even'thSnej 6 

No ^ingk pBits unequally. silrprise^ ^ . «i^ 



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, v cm ix}TsamsF in ;l^(h 21 

N^Xt to St. Paor» oaihedt^l for tx^ni&cenoe, 
tnd eten greater in es^ent^ • is .thati fioe «ioo(i->' 
nent of gothie architeetiure : Westminst^ Abbey, 
or the collegiate churob of St. P^ter. On its 
fiite once stood a temple dedicated to; Apollo .£(y 
iiie Roman settlers in Britain. Sebert, Kin^tof 
tfae Wiest Saxons, erected a Chri^an; college on 
the spot, which wasrepaired by Edward the Con^ 
fessorin 1066 ; Henry III. rebniltit,!ai^d Henry 
yn. added the chapel which is |||i9wn by bis 
name. ' i 

It 18 a magnificent gothic stractare in the form 
of a long cross; the choir is the most vbcttatiful 
in Enrope, and is celebrated as the place of 
coronation of the Kings and Queens of Englandi. 
- The Abbey contains may superb monnmentS 
of kings, statesmen, heroes, poets, and other me*- 
morable men who were distinguished for th^ 
patriotism, wisdom, genius, and learning. 

Many of the churches in the I^etropolis are 
heavy inelegantstradures, erected in obscure 
streets and confined situations, and apUy des- 
cribed in the jine, ' 'i(.: 

« Houses, Cfauicbes, nnxt togetlwi^" 

But there are also several beautiftil edifices 
conseci*ated to pttblic worship, particularly St. 
Martin's in the Pirfds, and St, George's, Haa- 



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&2 TH1D BNGLISH BtSTBOPOUS; 

OT€r Square^ each of wluch in adorqed witli an 
ctegant portico. St. Mary 4e- Strand is built in 
the most beautiful proportions of architecture^ 
and 8t. Stephen's Walbrook has long been ad« 
orired fpr the superior beauty of its interior archi- 
tecture. Among the modern churches that of 
St. Mary-le**Bone is remarkable for a spacious 
and stately portico composed of eight columns 
and two pilasters of Portland stone» in the Corii^ 
thian order; it has a projection on each side sop- 
ported by columns, and the circular turret on the 
roof is adorned by small Corinthian columns, con- 
tains a clock and bella, and is crowned by a gilt 
vane. ^ This church is built north and souths, and 
the northern front, which is opposite theBegent's 
Park, contributes by its noble and picturesque ap- 
pearance to the general beauty of the spot. 
Another new church, that of St. Fancras, is of 
Portland stone, in the Ionic order, built tiue east 
and west, opposite Seymour Place, ^omerstown. 
It will probably be finished in the course of the 
year )82<), and be equally ornamental to the 
neighbourhood, and convenieqt to its numerous 
inhabitants. 

The Tower odiONBON, which has been the 
scene of many a tragic and affecting event, is 
•the only fortress in th^ city. It is situated on 
the northern • bank of the Thames, eastward of 
liondon Bcidgie, and was iobtibited by the sore* 



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i^gii^ of Bifgland till ibe reigm nf QoeAi .I«liipR 
beth. It in aplac^^^f eofisicUrable teteit, 9ttd^ 
contains the Jewet OffieeyMiiit, three inrmoitriesi 
and the ro^rat frak of aitiM^ry. Tbef meqagieW 
rie, near the west enti^<ief, Ihm for ages heett % 
princijial object of atfradfioh to ra<ie iiri^tors, 
who oh their arrival eoilsidered it iadiKpensable^ 
to see iRk HoHs. 

ROYAt P ALARMS, 

St James's Pal«oe wir^in hotpitaly fobndWk 
befbr^e the Conqo^t, fo# feiirtfeen lepotarfdmaloi 
itnd eight males. It wds surrendered W fiebrjr 
YIII. in ir>32, who erected the ptempt edtfia^ 
and eficlosed St. J«mes*i9 Park w a placeit of 
amnseoient and exercise to tb^ i ttdates - of tbia 
palace and Whitebalh Qoleen Anne madv tbia 
palace her winter residence, and it was iorl90')prdJ 
ferred as sdch by Ckfoi'ge I. afnd Oterge IL 
His late Majesty George IIL, however, gtuva 
the f^eferenee to the; late Qneea'tf Palace, or 
Buckinghafili Honse, at t4ie we^rn extremity 
of St. James's Park. 

St. James's Palace is a plitia stractole 0f 
brick, but contains several coaofbiodioaB' state 
apartments. 

The late Clneen's Btlace k a handseme bi^d^ 
iiig of bricks tieitid irt' 1703 by the ihika of 



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^ THE vi:«h&M8H; J<P9APP»(rTS ; 

BW^f hftfti; Md pavchteetl % G^QtfO.IlI^m 
iSMytfet.liie'i^ayaL r6wl^ce«^ .The^partmc^uts. 
a^eMDagnifioent : .it 4teo €0^^(3^1)0$ vi^ y^Uia|:)le , U« 
bp^^Bnd;^ re^iofitl^fi stoucturf |^ j^F^pd J>y 
oKteiffiivejfiiidibeaAilifMl gardens. ., , . 

i. But itbe principal p^laiee in t|ie ,aietrp]poli$ is. 
Carlton. Hdme, the ftfi^^is% residence pf bis Ma« 
jesty King Greorge the Fourth. It is sitquted at 
the nortliern extremity of St. James's Park, was 
rebuilt a few j^t^s #go, ,ppd cpntains several 
commodious apartments,* furnished in the most 
^fendid lAanner.' , Tb^. i^rmoury; which o|ccupje8 
dMleeJarge room^^ i^thfi <npst curipqs;in l^urope,^ ' 
zmA xxlntftidi^.the.rsM^est ^peci^iens of j^pqient and 
iwdern firmour. ^ < L. >/r. ., 
: .The principal :fropt of^ Cj^fltpii House j^s mf^* 
Bificent) and. divided .frppiPfkll Mall by. a low 
sGile^; sarmountQd. ks^ a 4ne. col-o/ma^c^; in tihe 
Ie»^.ohler./ .. *■ . ; , , . •:, , . ■ -,< '*';./..' 

iDppoaitetbe froitt qf thi^.palace a,smajl squ;are, 
earUf^ WateirlQo-pJitce, and,* regular/streejt, ex- 
t&ndi»gi. Along the^radual. ascent to j.\ie ^d of 
VicoadlUy,wii|i,wben fijoisbed, add considerably to 
the architectural beauty of this part ojf t|i^ town. 
I4 is^to ibe tiegrfit&4> boweverrthat the bad taste of 
theiarcbiteot.has induced him to form the frontsr 
of the houses^ and even the columns at the en- 
tbtBo2s^:of that coiopositipp termed. Rom9.n ee- 
iamti^ni^ in plain ]Sngliji^,jp2a^(e;*;- w|;i(icb is s^ 



\ 



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OB, LQ^TBpN fS 1S20. ^ 

liable, J^ its cracks and flaws, to discover tfa^ 
dfiiAmnities bt iU very perishable substance. The 
fronts of thone two finejines of bi^lding ought to. 
have been either solid Portland stone, or gopd 
€b^ystock, brick; either of which ' would have 
eomhined durability with elegance, and har- 
monized with the jtnagnificence of. the palace at 
the southern end. • :; 

' Whe only remains of Whitehall Palaqe is the 
Bawqueting^houeey which stands on the east^^ 
Off Parliament-street. It is an exquisitely b^^uti*. 
fnl piece of architecture, of hewn stone, . two, 
iB^.'Mories high, adorned with coluijins and pila^^a 
of the Ionic and composite orders, the capitals, of 
whricfa are orbameoted with ensculptured folts^ 
and* fruit : the roof is covered with lead, and sur? 
rounded by a balustrade. 

The other remarkable public buildings in 
Westminster, bes^es the Abbey already miBn- 
tibned^ are the Horse-Guarda, a structure, of 
stone; the Admiralty, a large brick buildipg; 
Westminfeter Hall, the Hcmse of Lords, and th$ 
House- of Commons. 

PUALTC COMMEKCIAI- BUILDIXGS. 

Of theses the Royal ^plxchang?, foundf^ by Sir 
Thomas Gresham in 1566, a^d opened in th^ 
presence of Queen Elizabeth in 1570, is remark- 



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91^ THE itH&Lma. uatti^ifmAS ; 

f 

iMe not only m the nobts^t fdbric of the kind is! 
th^ world, but the faeiliCy which 'i^alfhrAtdm ^ 
ample square for the kitercoursie of merebant^ of 
lUltiatioM. t 

The tUyal l^xcfaaftg^e wae destroyed by ^ 
great fire ia 1606, and rebuilt of Portland ^taoe 
m its pr^ent form, by Sir Christopher Wren, at 
the expence of 80,000/. 

l^he Bank of England is an extensive and 
strong edifice of stone, situated to the nortfa^wesl 
of Cornhiit. The front is built in the lonie 
6rder^ and consists of a centre and two winga, 
adorned by a colonnade. The company of the^ 
Bank of England was incorporated by act of 
Parliament in 1094. Their original capital waa 
Kmited to 1,900,000/^ but it has been augment- 
ed at different periods, and now amounts to 
14,608,5001. 

The Custom House is an extensive modefti 
edifice, the first stone of which was ktid by the 
Earl of Liverpool, on the Sdthr of Qetober, 18ia< 
The south front is of Portland stone, ani lapbin^ 
with the exception of some figures in the ake-* 
relievo which adorn the attic ; but the eastern 
and western fronts are Jiighly decorated with al- 
legorical imagery. The long-room, perhaps the 
most spaciom in Europe^ is 190 feet long, ^6 
wide, add proportionably high. 

The East India Housiii Is sknatedon the soodi 



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om; xcwDOK ttr fS20; m 

Hide of Leadenhall-street, and contains the offices 
of the greatest and most opnle&t commercial 
company in the World. The front of this e<)ifice 
is of stotie, adorned in the centre iff^h six fiated 
idlutnbs \h the Ionic order, and a pediment, 
conlwnfitig several emblematic fignres. 

PUBLIC OWICIES. 

Somerset-place is a magnificent edifice of 
stone, situated in the Strand. The grand en- 
trance, by three lofty arches, opens to a spacious 
vestibule, ornamented with columns in the Doric 
order. The vestibule contains the rooms of the 
Royal Society, the l^ociety of Antiquarians, and 
the Royal Academy of Arts. 

The southern front, on the verge of the Thames, 
is erected on a terrace fifty-three feet wide, which 
is erected on a rustic basement, supported by an ar- 
cade of thirty-two arches, each twenty-four feet 
high, and tweWefeet wide. This arcade is adorned 
by rusticated Ionic columns, and the whole front 
may now be viewed to great advantage from 
Waterloo Bridge, to which it adids much mag- 
nificence. A particular description of this vast 
edifice would occupy several pages; it will amply 
gratify the curiosity of the visitor, whether a man 
of taste or a man of business. It contains tweu* 
ty one public offices, with commodious apartments 



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26 THB SKGUSH MWTKOVOUS; 

ID eacby for the accicimiiiQdatioii, p^ a secret^ry^ a 
poi:ter, and, tkeir faiDili<^&. ; 

THe Briti^ht Mqseqni is sif^^d in. Grwt Bw^ 
^el Street, Jffiiooaisbury^The 'edifice is buUli^.the 
plan of the ThuiUeries, aijid. was erected by 
Ralph, first Duke . df Mpn^gue. It cpntaiiis a 
grand* collection of antiquities, books, and -ttatu* 
ral curiosities, well worthy of the attention of 
every visitor to London. 

Besides the before-mentioned public buildings, 
the metropolis contains^ many others, includiog 
no less than forty-nine larg^ halls belonging to 
the incorporated companies of traders and ar- 
tisans. 

The Guildhall, or public hall of the city of 
London, is situated at the northern end of King- 
street, Cheapside. It jyas founded in the year 
1411. The new front, built in 1789, is a superb 
piece of gothic architecture, and the hall harmo- 
nizes with the beautiful exterior; it is a very 
piagnificent room, 153 feet long, 48 broad, and 
55 high, adorned with monuments erected to the 
memory of Mr. Beckford, liord Mayor of Lon- . 
don ; the first Earl of Chatham ; and his son, the 
Right honourable William Pitt, and numerous 
portraits of Kings and Queens of England. 



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' €*a, e6ni>on IN 1820. $9 

^H£ BITBA THAMfiS ANi> ITS SIX BfA0fi7IFli< 



QdpO€ 



lis far famed river, celebrated by historians 
andpoetSy and to which the English metropolii^ 
is chiefly indebted for its opulence ahd grandeur 
as a commercial city, takes its rise fi'om a IWfge 
isipringicalkd Thames Head, two toitessouth-West 
of Cirencester, in Gloucestershire. It is naf i<^ 
gable by ships of 800 tons up to Loudon Bridge; 
and by the largest shipi; to Deptford and Green- 
wich. 'The whole courseof the Thitoes^frblca 
Xjte source till itialls into the sesK, is 200 tuiles; 
a^ London it is about a quarter of a mile broad, 
and at Gravesend a mile. 

The banks of the Thames, irith^ metropolis, 
areiined with large manofaetoi^ies, siich as iron 
fotsmderies, glasls-houses, &c. ; aiid dapacidus 
warehc^^s, wberemierfchandize is^stored by th^ 
wharfingers. Wharfs are 6f tWa elsrases, oAe 
Uatiofed^Legal Quays, and the o^er Sufferance 
Wharfr^ ktld certain'goods are appropriated td 
^ack: ' The busiiieaa of a wharfinger is of great 
important^e, msbii^Uifb tliatliMir stores are Hie re^ 
fKttitOfles'-of 'the prineipa} health of this great 
tfietn>{(ol!^ } and they; With the li^hteriden, ti(^et 
]k>ftet%^ Und 6t)ter assiBtfeiiMs, mwage' the whole 
of the water-side business — such as'l%tifariiig. 



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m THE VWOUSH H1BTR0Pai«fS; 

landing, housing, unhousing, loading, and de- 
liTering' every deacriptton <tf merchattdttev 

London Bbi]m», tke most ancient in thb 
. metropolis, was first built of wood, in the eleventh 
century. It wf^s for ages encumbered with bopses 
on each side^ which ovorbmng the arches/ an<| 
leaned in a terrible a^kn];ier4 They were rfr- 
movfd in 17;5^ when^ tlie ^pper pai't of tb^ 
hrjdgfl was rebuilt m a very eiegaM modern 
s^yl^ The water- works on the north-west ^14^ 
of i^ bridge supply ^ consi^able part of the 
inhabitants of the. city with waiter. Tbere if 
idsa a waterwwheel at the southern angle of this 
bridge, which throws up the water into a br^ 
pipe, and s^Sords a suppfy, of that ekmpnt la 
Southwark. i 

., SojUTHWiiBi^ Baixmsoe; is intended tj> H^ntn a 
(i^wmufii^ation, from th? bottom x)f ftueenHitreek^ 
Qheajpside, to Bai^kside... It fiousistH of thrae 
iM^enrches of cast-iron, placed ^upon pieMftiid 
^^tmentft of stone« ... 

BtACJU^viAiUi BlupQK is a c»ost o^$^iH$hcank 
Of nfuaient jt9 tho .|u#tr4)ipQlis, Its situatiottiis ad- 
n^irabfy ad^pte^ to add to the effect <tf its beMUti** 
f^ ar^hitecitureit being ne^i^Jy in th0 central part 
of the cs^pita^^con^ipQang. utility with ^egaiw 
fis^a^:place of tmnsit, aiidf)reo»6a«i^ay4«)|'geM»- 
^^\ vi^w of the greatest t^ mli^ wftdd &Qak^ 
eentxaVel^vatiqiK . . . . ' . i 

8 

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T*«« bridge lias «iylit piera, udorae d . i«4th 
I^fc p'rlliirS) wbiqb Mpport Qinc^^lliptteal grebes. 
It is built of PortWod jtoqe; w I.IXX) feet loog^ 
9^ 4% bfQad, witb fiagg«id footbpatbs, and tre- 
cesses for the accommodation of paMe&gers. 'Its 
gradual elevation 'adds iBoeh Ui ite picttiresiiae 
ai^ majestic beapty^^espeOially when eompwed 
iPvHh the di4l plane ^ Waterloo Bridge, whidi 
baet b^^Ai overpraised by the pretenders to a taste 
for architecture. 

Waterloo Bri]>g;b crosses the Thames 
fi'pm the western angle of Somerset Honaa to 
LambMb Marsbt It consists .of* nine regular 
ar€^e!B^ and '^. so flat l^bat it reminds the traveUer 
of the aqaedu^t wbicb conveys the Lancaster 
canal over tbe rivef Xfnne, about half a ndile frMa^ 
that town ; with thmdiflejrenoey that the latter ba» 
only $ve, and'the (ermer nine aifches-. Bot, nrt^ 
withataadinif its di^ ititness^ it is a magntficent^ 
s|;ract^;re, erected by: (be subscriptioq of a joints' 
stQcK oon[i|Kany, sftncftioned by an act. of Fbrlia« 
ment. Theiir ci^aVis one miUkm. sterling ;l^ufr 
whether the tolls required of fMtepgisrs will lei^er' 
repay the interest of the money is very doubtfult 
when its oomparati^i^ remote sittration^ and the 
free jtio^^e over BtackA*iars Bridge, in a much 
more populous and central part of the town, are 
considered. 



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32 THE ittlCfeUSH' M£TR0P01ilS ; 

s WESTMiN^mnt Bridge, l^his beautHtil or- 
imment of the west ^nd of the town is 1,223 fctet ^. 
long*, 44 feet wide; it has thirteen large, arid twa 
snvall arches, and* is adorned with twentjr -eight 
aeini-octangnlar. towers. 

> VauxhalIi Bridge. Thfe is the most un- 
important structure of the kini] in the metropolis, 
lit crosses the'rirer at Millh^nk; to the opposite 
vicinity of Vami^haU Gardens ; consists of nine 
arches of cast-iron, supported by- piers of stone>' 
and is said id have cost ^OOiOOOZ. 
' :Therei are many other arobit^ctoral ornaments 
in Ibis great ciiy, among wbith the'MoNUBfENT, 
situated 200 yaf ds north of LdtTdon Bridge, is re^ 
markablel It is a fluted colunln of the Doric 
order, 202 feet. high. It wcfe (erected in memory 
of the g^eat.fire,*wbichy in 11S^^*br6ke outat a 
bMse onithe spot;, and^destroyefd'tbe ihetropolts 
from the Tower to Temple >Bi^; '* The inscrip- 
tion on the pedestal^ impntit^glAe calamity to 
Popbh. iiic^idiariesi ' dkcited ' tbe « indignation of 
Fo[ie^ who alhides to it intone of his. satires 
in^tbe foUowing^Kfiep : > : ♦ 

».. ' •'.*;•» . - ' - 

'^ London's co^aron pointmg; to the skiesi. ; . . 
Like a tall bully, lifts the h^,,^axid lie^^* 



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GENERAL OBSERVATIONS 

ON 'tHE VARIOUS CLASSES OP THE INHA^ 
BITAT^TS OF LONDON, 



- Major f^mae sitis est quam. 



Virtutis ; quis enim virtutem amplectitur ipsam, 
Praemia si tollas? ' ju venal. 

JcROM the foregoingf descriptive Sketch of the 
Topography of London, and of its principal edi- 
fices, the transition to strictures^ on the mani>ers 
of the inhabitants, is obvious and natural. In 
this respect the metropolis is as unrivalled as it is 
in every other distinction, which marks it as the 
capital of the British Isles, and the first city on 
the habitable globe. 

A classification of the population of London 
might appear formal and absurd, if not imprac- 
ticable; yet certain it is, that the different gra- 
dations of SQciety are almost as distinctly per- 
ceptible, as if there had been a philosophical ar- 
mngement of this vast community. 

Next to the Royal Family, our nobility are 
fouspicuous, not only for their hereditary ho- 
Qour§} immense revenues, and splendid establish- 
mentSj b,ut in numerous instances for their intel-. 
lectual, r^n^ment, elevation of sentin^eati be-* 
. c 



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34 THE ENGLISH METROPOLIS; 

nignity and amenity of manners, and that cha- 
riBicteristic munificence, which has been incul- 
cated by their parents and preceptors, and en- 
forced by the liberality of their intimate friends, 
till it has become so habitual as to be considered 
an indispensable duty. The English nobleman 
is generous because he is a nobleman, and how* 
ever parsimonious his natural disposition may be, 
he is obliged to ^* assume- a virtue,'^ so general 
among his country mep of high rank. Henct 
our nobility continue to be as their ancestors have 
for ages been, the patrons of every ornamental 
and useful art, which contributes to the gratifi- 
cation or improvement of society ; and the 
architect, the artist, and the author, are success- 
ful, beneath the animating influence of combined 
opulence and taste. 

That there are worthless and insignificant, as 
well as profligate, individuals among our nobi* 
fity, cannot be denied ; but the number is now 
comparatively few, and those shrink from the 
scrutinizing glance of ian enlightened and high<7 
spirited community, whose animadversions makef 
vice and folly tremble in the inmost recesses of 
the most splendid mansion. Indeed, a compa- 
rison of public manners in liondon twenty years 
ago, and at the present moment, roust convince 
the most sceptical, respecting national ameliora- 
tion of morals, that a steady, and i# is to be 

3 



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• OH, IjOJUP&OI^ t^ 18*0. '^ &6 

bopMl pr6^es$i¥e mpvtvement ' distifigUi A^ 
1^ pv^etA age, abor^^ all fdl'tn^f periods ia tfa^ 
hfertofy of Ibi^capitiil. '. 

'Prom the bef ibtiing of the present century to 
the present moment^ there das been ft gradual 
cfeangie in the morals, n«t owly df persons in high 
lifey birt throdgbonl the^ eotnnniotHty, which is pe^ 
ciiK^iy de)ig«htfal totho dpecoletive mind; and 
Jiigliiyibeudieial to tho individual a«d the eom^ 
muoity..- '.•.-. 

: 'Twen^ years ago f)rofligacy b^ attained a 
gigantic fovmf and moted itith the celerity 
and impbrtftdee of a eimqoeror in this great city, 
ifbe monster thetf displayed as many heads as 
the fabled Hydra. Oanaing, drunkenness, duel-- 
)ingt nrusfcal. parties m' Sunday evenings^ con« 
cUbinage in all its rftmifioatiMs, and adultery, m 
allita infocDous^md nauseous rarieties, vrtidted 
mafiy indiTidiials of very exalted r«nk, whos^e 
emuMple and influence produced a shodking viti*- 
ation of morab, not only among their immediate 
(tependantsy bot throughout the tnferibr ranks 6f 
sad«ty . Triftls for erim^ ccn.y as they weref then 
gaily and poMely termed, became^ ft kiftdof pub- 
lit armosement; our oaurta of juelice^ wer« ^ 
tfiMnged by * carious tyroa in die art of seduO'^ 
ttOA ; our net^spapers went JMed iHlh tine non^. 
fum\e9A libaldry, aMl^ mdeoeut oxplM^on de- 
posed by witnesses) to sUbMMIiMft filets, ia^ 

c2 



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36 TH1& BNGUSH MBTROPOLIS; 

criixi|pat6 male and female proflig^ates; while 

.pamphlets, cpotaining those trialsi written by. 

needy sensualists, and published by unprincipled 

hoak^Uer$(, spread the contagion qf vice among 

the vulgar herd^ who always grasp with avidity 

wha^tever has a te^ncy to depreciaite their siii 

periors. This pestilential crime, which seemild 

to menace the gradual dissolution of matrimonial 

and collaterally of national.booour, derived ibtidh 

of its pernicious energy, from the circum<^Aiica 

that. the 4elinquents wei:e permitted to marry; 

and hence, in some instances, divorce was ii^ 

reality a cause of exultation to the shfimeless 

violator of the first connubial tow. But aUifaoaglf 

the laws could not punidb the offender in a signal 

-and efficient manner, the indignant aversion of 

an, enlightened community, by unianimously set*^ 

ling the stamp of infamy, on the names oi the 

adulterer and adultress, terrified mbny gay 

and dissdute beitags, and compelled them to pay 

some deference to the puUic opinion, whatever 

might be their ow-n.pitopensity to folly and vice» 

The natural decay too of some finst<^ate sensual* 

ists^ counteracted the spread of dishonour among 

u% insomuch that conjugal infidelity is now out 

of countenance. Several of its warmest advocates 

and au^c^pionsly shameless practitiooem, whose 

example for a time concealed its ddformity, are 

li^ecpme S9p§ramiu9t6d^ . T|i«ir limbs will no 



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hngtr perfopm.ibe service of vice;. their grey 
beards and hollow eyes remind them of morta« 
lity ; the p^lsy, atrophy, aod. death itself, assail 
tliein; aod they can no longer* e«|XMSon.tfae 
spriogis of social morality, even if they- fdt the. 
isdmattonJ The inferior degrees of laeontioettcfe* 
hare also fallen into disrepute, and mattrknony is^ 
again in jEa^hion. . . < r^ 

As for ihe foUtes of the great, tfaoogh sofeie 
traces c^ frivolity and levity remain, .3^ thoaet 
foibles are trivial, compared with the exploits of 
men who a^ired to notoriety twenty, years ago. 
We seldom hear ^f the mad pranks of the Four--' 
in-hand Club, who made such a noise, and raised: 
sneh a dust, at that period* Baochanaliaa. 
orgies are also less frequent and celdbracted,- 
since the wit of.S ■ , and the good hnmoiir 

of F ' ' ' , ceased to enliven those corivivialT 
circles^ where they shone like stars of the Jirsti 
magnitude, and Han^et's. apostrophe to the seidl; 
of Yorick is^now applicable to theirs. 

When the beauties of spring invite our npbi* 
lity. to the country, the: citixen feela all the re-^ 
gret of jsdfisbness at their temporary absence. 
He ex[dofies his ledger with a heavy hearty and 
beholds , the accumulated aodount unpaid^ mbihi 
lus noble custoiBers are fly tng away fmm him on. 
horses as fleet as the wind. Well ntay jhoxien^ 



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98 THS: SKi^USH MCTRO^OlIS; 

sure th6 tardiness of some honourable wen in the. 
payment of their bills ! 

The dealers in lace, millinery, pprfutnery^ 
and oosmeliieH, have most reason to repine at tke^ 
annual excursions of the fashiol|iable and gay;. 
Our nobility, indeed, like the genial sun, give 
existence) to the various inseet tribes of effeoMi" 
nacy that thrive only in their fostering^sniilet. 

If the vetliries of pleasure pay a transient visit 
te the antique castles of tbeir abcesters^ where 
ho6|Mtality once reigned, they sdon growlisllessy 
and all the charms of Flora's musky tribes Afibvd 
them little amusen^ent* Impatient of solittide, 
and unable^ to bear the preaettce of r^BeotioH^ 
they hasten to some wfiterkig place, where they, 
ptwify tbeir exterior by Arequefit aUuticMis. Can 
vice exist where external purity prevails ? Alaa! 
the celd<-bath is too often resorted to, es a prepay > 
rative fer the repetition of new excesses durii^ 
the next wintef'^ cainpaign in the metropobs j 
and though our nKHtem gpddesae» rise like 
Venus irresistibly chafmii^ from thb sea, yet few 
of them are possessed of the chastity of Diana. 

A variety of^mosements gratify the fancy of 
the frequenters of wkteriegwplaces. The mom^ 
i»g rrde, OQ walk along the shore ) the agreeeUe 
tiipiii afkiasufe-hoat; the nevnest publicataoea' 
el the cirotflatiDg libraries; and dieexhibHiea 



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OB) JMK^OS IN 1820. 39 

M f^atitotnimes and farces at the temporary 
tb«atr€^« The whispers of scandal, and the 
sighs of wantonness^ vibrate in onison^ as the gay 
throng wander through the deceptive Ifiibyrin^ 
dfwreal pleasure^^ 

^ Thut^ Kke the dtfole, boundh^ sarlh and skief, 
AUares frood far^ aad as they follow, flies.*' 

lotbis vortex of dissipation^ the fair sex are 
mad^ giddy with the flattery of their beaux : here 
the kept-mistress rears her supercilious front 
with unblushing confidence; and wantonness, 
sanctioned by the approving smile of the crowd, 
appears amiable ! Wha^ an excellent school for 
the youthful, modest Virgin ! Here the modish 
rake will exercise every artifice to effect her se^ 
ductioo« His graceful form, elegant manners, 
and t^e ease attained by having seen the worlcl, 
render tki^ accomplished lover irresistible ; in* 
jsomuch that^ allured by his seductive wiles, she 
elopes with her betrayer,^ mam ^ef own happi* 
ness, and blasts the ho[|eof hef fond paret^ts. 

Were you, ye feilr, but cautidus whom ye tr^st. 
Did ybu but knoit" hem tfd^ih fbob at6 juiit ; 
Se isttAf of y^M tfex tvw^^ilot in VaiM) 
Of kroken imm^ aid fatthless 'mooi oomphisk 

ROWS. 

Were perstas of quality nnaniBions in prti- 



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40 TUB ENGLISH ' MUBITROPOLIS ; 

motiAg virtucT and decency, we might $oon hopB 
to see a favourable change in the coaiiners of ihf 
people. But where are those magnanimous in^ 
dividuals, who will, with a noble fortitude and 
self-denial, begin the work of public reformatioo 
by their example ? Where is that gigantic mind, 
that, rising superior to the derision of fashionable 
vanity, and contemning the childish vagaries of 
a disordered imagination, wisely prefers the ap- 
probation of tl^e Deity f and the " sunshine of the 
hreast^^ to the fantastic joys of effeminacy and 
profligacy ! 

Let such truly g^eat minds shine on the world 
of fkshion, like light rising out of chaos, and by 
their' brightness expose the deformity of ?iceand 
the misery of dissipation. Such benign beings 
may yet, like ministeripg angels, cherish the 
good propensities of the human heart, and con- 
vince the rest of our nobility, gentry, nay, the 
whole community, that decency of dress and 
manners, purity of heart, charity to man, and 
ipteiy to God, only, can conduct mortals to the 
blissful regions of eternal felicity. 

Next to the nobility in rank, importance^ and 
respectability, are those gentlemen of landed 
property, whose senatorial duties require their 
presence in London during several months in the 
year, and, excepting the distinction of a title, 
Ih^re is a very ^reat similarity of mc^nners and 



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babils, as well aa'kn iirtimate. sofcml ifitercourse, 

between tbeii and Ibe :her^ditary legislators^ of 

the upper House. The vast ^estates, and great 

weaUhtc^.many of oQr country gentlemen, entitle 

them to that distinetioD and superiority in Lob* 

4oii5 w^icfa have be^ considered the peoiKar 

privileges of the opulent in all ages of the world,* 

.^uadtbe progressbn of civilized society; and the 

' candid and anHasslBd observer will readily.uo* 

knowledge, that ithe majority ^f our nomeroos 

and enltjgfateiied g^^mtry, weil desetve'^be riches 

they possess; md are equally distinguishable^ 

while in town, for their liberal ^ncouragem^t of 

(he fine arts,^ and.. exemplary in the country for 

ittmlr HMai^^eerlp those around them, and 

their u^AoN^c^tations manners. , ^< > 

In Lonclon, like the nobility, tliey hold a^very 

important place: in segskety, and contribute, by 

itiiie ex^npe #f their ei^ensive establi^ments, to 

the general (NTosperity of this capital, where a 

Very oonisideBajblepart of tfa^ineoipe is anntiaily 

.circulated} in ret«rn for which, tbey receive niu 

J9»erdus •grfl^ifications from the procbctions of na« 

^ture and art# which, tbey could not obtain. else* 

wh^E^, on an^ terms* In many instances they 

jare patrons of whatever thay comreive to be 

praiseworthy or useful;, and itjieir munificence 

in.thie promotion of every institution,. that has a 

lendenc^to improve Ihelmman mind, or mitigate 



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4& THE mUGUSH .UnVJLOVOlM i 

the eviii iof lifei am miequalled by the grMt in 
any other oommaAity in t\e workL Some silly 
and imbecile votariea of affectation andfoUy, po- 
oasionally appear, in what is te?med the fathion- 
aUa world ; bat tbey merely ^erve to amuse 
tbd more Aenttble and refined nobility and g&ih 
try^ with whom^ in eonseqoeoee of their ranl;,^ 
they are suffered to mingle. Ifvdeedi the gaieties 
and whims of flighty individuals, serte to * amuse 
their acquamtaiic^ just as the bnffboaeries of the 
comedian, the rant of* the tragedian, aadthe agi- 
Uty of the <huicer, Sfffbrd them a pleasurable ^>ec- 
taele oo the publie stage^ 

It has been almost the invariable cmstom with 
writers on popular manners, to satirize (^ higher 
classes of society, wtthout much diseriwnnatiou. 
To censure those above us is: natoral enough, 
because, though we cavnot emtdatey we , may 
envy them; but tratk requinfei mow ilignified 
atrietures; if vices or fbllite become dangerous 
as imitaUe pucsuitsv they ought to be expoit^ ; 
but the variatioQs in dressy or even mabners, 
while they oootiniue ineffinistTe, ao4 have 4ie ten^ 
dency to violate decency, or pervert sentimetrt, 
may be suffered to pass away witbMt ooBmirint, 
or amuse the spectator,, like the trauMent display 
of (he butterfly en the wing. > 

Whoever wiU candidly and dispassioaatdy ob^- 
serve the ctedsct of the aobiK^ and gentry of 



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OR, U>NI>0N IN 1830. 4S 

file United KiogdotQ, rnuat aicknowledge, tbtt iH 
Ul their traniiactiondy integrity aiid libemlity we 
conspicuous virtues. £<iqcated with the utmost; 
care, their minds itnboed with the most vir- 
tuous precepts and honourable sentifDents^ they, 
constitiite an illustrious asseoiblage in the fwbel* 
ii$hittei)t of society in J^wioti, By thein» thet 
fine and the use^l ^rts, 9fe patronised with ^ 
protti^itude and muaifieea^e^ unknown in othar 
nations. When tbey retire to tbeir rural o^aiK: 
siow^ many of w'bich are ador^ y/^\th Om co9t^ 
liest ornaments of Grecian archi|Lectnre» and sor-.^ 
rounded by every species pf sylvan beauty, they 
enlighten and cheer those surrounding' husibaii4r 
men and their families, who are so ba|>py as to^ 
confte withia tbeif observatk>Q* In retirement^, 
the virtues of our nobijity aoid gentry, are pro- 
ductive of the mofll beneficial effects among 
tbra* tenantry and depandents} and in num^rotis 
instances, they perform the duties of true patriotet 
fay the enconr^emetKi of mdostry, by premiums 
and other beoefaedoas ; and the incalca^ion of 
piMy a«d morality^ by the endoisment af insti* 
tutieiis fiur the instnftc tion of youth. Yet we seU 
dum meet aa enoomiom oa the virtues of those 
eiitimabib individuals, because th^ are onosten*^ 
tatioua; like tjhe hiaiinary of day they cheer 
and: ealigfaftctt aU malm the sphere of their in« 



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44 THE'&I^GLISH MKTROPOtilS; . 

fltience, ^ add their best earthly reward^ is the 
coAtesiplalion of that felicity cqjoyed by others, 
tb which they are instrimient^I. 

Bat while thoosands of our manly and ge- 
nerous countrymen in high Ufe^ thus promote tbe 
happiness of their dependants and friends, there 
are, it must be confessed,- some gross sensualists^ 
Of very high rank indeed ; who, in a moral 
sense, contaminate whatever they touch, shine to*, 
allure, and smile to destroy ! Beneath' their bale- 
ful influence, purity of heart, delicacy of senli'- 
ment, and dignity of mind, are deposed to de- 
basement, and too often perish in the dreadful 
ordeal. The only safety for the ingenuous youtb, 
or the blushing virgin, is to fly fronii the seduc- 
tive fascination of voluptuousness, lest they be- 
come as impure, unfeeling and impious as the 
obdurate votary of habitual licentiousness. 

The love of amusement, so natural to the Ira-i 
man itiind;iS) doubtless, the master-passion of the. 
frivolous, gay and thoughtless in every class of 
society, not only among the youthibl votaries of 
pleasure, but thousands, who have '^ grown early 
grey but never wise," in punmit of that phan-. 
torn bf perishable delight, obtainable in great 
cities. In thi? respect our nobility and' gentry 
possess a great super<iority over merchants and- 
tradesmen, whose attiention is preoccupied by bu-- 



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' OK, LONDON IN 1820.' 46 

siiiess; htnce ihe wealth and tnunificeiice of per* 
SeOhs of quality not only gives tbem a pre^emi- 
neoce, but renders tbeoi the arbiters of fashion 
and tn^te; their patronage ensures the success 
of the ingenious sculptor, painter, and engraver; 
andieveo on the public stage, the player is chiefly 
ittd^bted to their appirpbation, for that^ very tem- 
porary fame, acquired by excellence in the histri-^ 
onic art. 

Much pf the prosperity of tradesmen in Lon- 
don arises from the liberality, and elegant luxury 
of our nobility and gentry, whose mansions, 
s))ining with the splendour of a palace,: are de- 
corated with the costliest ftirnitiure, pointings, 
and books, which can be produced by human in- 
genuity in its highest state of perfecticm. 
. While the noblemen and the country gentle-* 
men thus contribute to the embellishment of Lon- 
don, the merchants of this celebrated emporium, 
of commerce, are still greater public benefactorsr, 
. not only to their (ellow- citizens, but thd inhabitants, 
of the whole Britidi empire. Within the last halC 
century, the foreign and domestic traffic of Eng*«» 
land in general, and this metropolis in particcdafr 
has increased beyond credibility; wealdi ba^ 
flowed into our seaports from every point of the; 
compass, and while the mercantile property .oIk 
tained by the knowledge, activity and applica- 
tidn of our manwfacturers and merchants^ ha$ 



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46 TH£ ' ENCtLTSH HBT&OQPOLIS ; 

enabled as to sapply tbe wants of modtl^impean 
sa^HHis^ the oonseqnent acquisition of ^eattb by 
trade raised the landed property of onr nobility 
and gentry to double its former valoe. Hence 
tbe princely revenues %fhicb they possess; re- 
TenuAs more Tolaable than those dependent apon 
commerce, because not liable to ftuctuation or 
accident. 

To the English merchant then, our nobility, 
and even the king on bis throne, o\Ve the in* 
crease bf their income, while all the elegant ac«* 
cbmmodations,. and even the comfortable neces* 
saries of life, have been multiplied and more 
easily obtainaUe by peraons in every gradation 
of civilized society. 

Most of the magnificetit as well as^ usefhl itn* 
pmvements wfaidh adcvn modem London> ori- 
ginated in the puUie ^irit and opulence of her 
menshants. The three new bridgeis oree the 
Thames, which at once adorn the capita), and 
Indiitftte the intercourse with* the inhabkants on^ 
tbe southern side of that river, were bmlt l^ thi& 
subacrqAbos of mercbaat^ Those excellent 
liteiufy and philDSopiiioal establishments^ the 
Jjmdmh aiKl Surry Institutions, also arose) front' 
Hk^ mi mifec Hce and taste of m€« engiBiged^ in^ 
trade; amd the Mmevout in^n^v^ettietita m the. 
streets^ edi6ees> and police of London, s& eetK 
^kmve t» the eottv^nienoe of tmdienta^ staid vi^ 



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c.tMt^ CONDON IK 1830. 41 

Mtors, have beep efected by the mde&tigable 
perseverance of the :corporation 0f this great city ; 
or, in other WorcEs^ by hdr patriotic merchants 
and tradesmen. . 

That there are men actively engaged in trade, 
^ho are a dishonour to the British name and 
nation^ will not be denied by any person at all 
conversant with public life. Nefarions specula^ 
tors will insinuate themselves into the best regu«> 
lated communities, and fraudulent Jbankruptti, at 
once cheat their creditors, and dtotroy their own 
peace of mind, by premeditated perjuries ; hot 
ttie merchants of London, with a few exjceptions, 
are not only the glory of their native city, as the 
snccessiul contributors to its proi^erity and ag- 
gtandizement, Imt an honour to human nature 
itself, by their unimpeachable probity, and tbeic 
liberal habits, sentiments, and nianners. 

As public characters, the punctualityand cre- 
dit of our merchants have long b^en established ; 
and when any national exigence requires a con-* 
tribution, the generosity of the mercantile body 
equals even that of the nohility. 
• In private life they generatiy are amiable ^lia«^ 
racters. But, however estimable when detached 
from business, "they se^Mu to consider many evils,^ 
connected with commerce, as necessary conse- 
quences, and therieffore venial. Gommerpe, that 
impress of luxury and dissipation, pours her 



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48 THE BNtSLISH HfiTROF0US ; ' 

treasures into this city ; the people become self^ 
ishj and while Trade liberally. rewards her vo^ 
taries, she laughs at the scruples; • of ;c6nscience«i 
What was once stigmatized with the name o£ 
extortion^ is now softened, into speculaliibn. Spe- 
culation is a sonorous word, applied with greMr 
success both in trade and philosophy; U^t jitst 
true meaning in plain English is imi?6sitxon. 
The specnlatibg merchant looks forward, and 
perceives that there will probably be a scarcity 
of an Particle of commerce : he haptens to pur- 
chase ^ die erent justifies his expectation, and he 
sells his merchandise, for perhapa double the price 
it cost. 

But this is a very moderate monopoly. Let 
us^ for a moment, turn our eyes toward the Eart, 
and we will behold an iooffensi¥e people de- 
prived of their possessions by n^n wbooi tihey 
never injured, and who live in fiffluen^e . and 
luxury on the spdils of the widpw ^nd the father- 
less. What says Commerce P — they are all 
honourable men^.. 

The spirit of enterprise in this vast city is 
astonishing. Cornfectors monopolize our grain; 
and even dairymen prevent the waste bf milk 
and butter, by enhancing the price of these ne- 
cessaries. ./ 

Many slight deviations from rectitude are 
overlooked in civilized society. Perhaps the 



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iftMt p€MicioiM 6vf| which aeconpanie^ wealth 
M| tb^ id^a that errery things is porchasable; tbst 
the integrity and talentg of meA^ and the chastity 
6f w^meti^ may be sacrificed on the altar of 
Mammon; nay^ that lote and eten friemMiip 
are Veifta}. This assertion, tboagb pladsible^ and 
in too many inrtances appHoable,iatiot g-eaerally 
true ; and it were mocb to be Wishedy for the 
honour of human natore, that its fallacy shcmld be 
Exposed by every lover of social bappincas. 

Those moralists, who eontend that ndanhind ara 
happier ia a state of afrietrlttiral and pastoral 
inmplicity than in commuoiticKi where ^onmcnrce 
pre? ails, seem to have forgfct that '^ ar^ngth 0f 
mind^u exerci^e^ not test /" and tbat we enjoy tf 
thousand conveniences and eleg^ances unknown 
to thd Qotniored agriculturis«f of Otaheita^ ^ 
even of th« Westera Isles of ScMland. 

A claisi6d«tioii of the mercbMfts of London 'n 
it^ufsite %b impie^i the nmid of tho yc^d^ witl» 
a proper idea of the order which pt^vail^ in tb^ 
various departments of the greatest commereial 
OMHnQttity that eter existed on earth. The Ihrst 
or bighpeet da$aef mardtantt, cbieiiy reside attbe^ 
wwt end 6(^1^ town, and assimilates in matmeni 
and habits with the nobility Md gentry^ with 
whom, kk WMfj iMtance^i t^ey are tntermarri^, 
01 m babiii el tbe most ameabla intiMacy. 
SMMofdMOiafettembetfiitf the lower Ho«r««^ 



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60 THE BNGJLISH MBTROPOMS; 

and they are ia general, very rich. These com- 
mercial men commonly go to the city about noony 
and amuse themselves with whatever intelligence 
is a6oat respecting trade. They never take an 
active part in business, for their affairs are trans- 
acted by deputy, even to the writing of letters. 
They return home early in the afternoon, and ge- 
nerally dine about six o^clock. 

The second class of merchants arie more in- 
dustrious. They are mostly very opulent, and 
reside in their country houses in the vicinity of 
London, particularly in or near Hackney, Ho* 
merton, Blackheath, and Camberwell. They 
generally arrive in the city at ten o'clock in win- 
ter, and nine in summer; and spend the darly 
part of tlie day in making inquiries respecting 
the markets. Their information is obtained from 
brokers, who act as agentsi between buyer and 
seller. They appear at the Royal Exchange 
fjtom four to five o^clock in the afternoon ; write 
their letters after ^Change hours, and then return 
home. 

A third class of merchants rank with ship 
brokers, like them are very assiduous in businessj 
and their hours of refreshment depend upon com- 
mercial circumstances. 

Ship brokers act between merchants and mas- 
ters of vessels, and are paid by the latter, at ah 
agreed rate on the amount of their freight. Thusy 



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^ OR, I.ONIION IN 1820. 51 

sale brokers, ship brokers, and inslurance brokers, 
with the inferior gradations of custom-house 
agents, wharfingers, lightermen, &c» transact the 
import and export business of London, by the. in- 
struction and authority of the merchant ; nay, 
so universal is this system of agency, or doing 
business by proxy, that when application is made 
to a merchant respecting his goods, he can- 
not give an immediate answer, but either a 
reference to liis agent, or a promise that he will 
inquiry, and give the requisite information at an 
appointed time. 



GENBRAIi CHARACTERISTICS OF THE PEOPI.S 
OF LONDON, WESTMINSTER, ANi> SO€TH-^ 
WARK. 

The predominant and most obvious charac- 
teristic of the. common people of this great me-r 
tropolis, from the merchant down to the vender 
of ballads and matches, iaa busding and inces- 
sant' eagerness to get money, and a disposition- 
to spend it luxuriously. To tSie acquisition of 
gain all the powers of the body, and energies of 
the mind are directed by the grekt majority of 
tradesmen, who seem i to think themselves bora 
for no otber purpose but to acquire wealth. la 
this pursuit 'tihey are g^sierally successful ; pro- 
Da 



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Si THIJ BKGUSH HBTEOPOUS ; 

pfirtj 18 otHaiued by iodiistry, and thei cooUMrciAl 
Q^iuii ri^tirefli from buflineas to enjoy the good 
^pga oi this life^ wb^i bis capability of eojoy^* 
iftg tJiijem is^ alittO«t extiaot. 

Kut tnaoy of the most sagacious of our trades- 
(o\k, s^w^re of the uncertainty of life» wkh to 
profit by the pre9ent moment, and are sot less 
remarkably for their propei^stty to good living, 
tfaaa Uieir knowledge c^ business. The ^rt of 
liviog well, or good Uving, according ta tiie 
ttoodard aet upiin Loodoa, does nqt always pro* 
mote the health and serenity of the practitioiiep* 
View a voracious citizen, or a rustic visitor to the 
capital, seated in a tavern with the good things 
pnnrifled by cvliiiary skili before him, what a 
Bflttbtr of lAttocetit amaiab mcist.be piit to dieath 
to gratify his taste, and satiate his appetite I The 
* most ferocious savage of the wild appears ami- 
abfe, compared with. such a goirmai>di«r. The 
efitioen devoted to good livings undoubtedly ei»* 
SBi^aes nKM^thait douMb the qunntitgr of alinieiil 
feqwsita for hifr salutary suslaiiaMe^ a^iatbe 
course of twenfcj? yeaes^ devour»a fleek of at Uaafe 
ftirty skMf) and knks, aad a herd of tw^l^t 
tmet^ frftj^ SWMM of ditfeapent gra&rfMfs^eC ^wth^. 
QDe bvndred. Newcastle sahuoa^ aDdsomemiL 
limis (tf sBHdler fidies, iiMlodiiig sprais^ Bm4t 
akrimpsw^ As Ant' ^uors^ such ip^kv; tkilvt^linUi 
the vipe aeMoa ittade^paa^ i# t^ifflf raffijpietil^ 



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PR, LONDON IN 1620. 58 

liquid for the dilution of fais food, mnd tke fec^ 
water of the Tbadies must be purified by the 
action of fire, and be improved in colour and 
flavour, by a fermentation with decocted taalt, and 
an infusion of hops, to quench hts feverish fervour^ 
Soch excess swells many of our ** fat and gii^asy 
citizens," to that enormous corpcdence, so fr^ 
quently the subject of the caricaturist's ^rty Md 
so continually a burthen to tbemselvies. 

Next to the love of money, and gidbd livings, ^ 
(nromment characteristic of the |^ood follts of 
London, is a passion for public spectacles. Sin«$# 
the beginning of the present centul-y they havi 
been amused with several public exhibitionism fh^ 
most renaarkable of Whidi was that of Ihe lEth^ 
piSror of Russia and the King of Ih*iBsia^ wiA 
their retinue of princes and heroes in June }914^. 
Wherever the Emperor and fiihigappeiil^ed in phb- 
lic,' acclamations from the ttiroatd bf thdtiiraudi 
stunned them. <' Smrely ," said they toone atidthei^, 
^ there must be something very retntlricable in tfaf 
appearance^ or very absurd in the minds of tlU! 
populace of London, to provoke such tociftif^tion. 
Hiey must haVe the beiit hingft in tha WorM, artd 
be very idle too, or they would not tbtl^ assemble 
in crowds, in the dusty stt*eMs, t(> gaze on a few 
foraigttelv."' In f^l, lio perpetually wem Alex- 
ander and Wiffiam attnoyed l^ thecdrioas lodks, 
aad otitstrttdled haadg df the tttl^r of ev^ 



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54 THE ENGLISH METROPOUS J ' 

class of society, during their continuance in Lon- 
don, that they were obliged to rise early, and 
ride out incognito, to have the pleasure of a view 
of the English metropolis. In one instance, 
Alexander's saddle-girth happened to get loose, 
he nimbly alighted and buckled it ; and this im- 
perial act was recorded among the wonders of 
the day in our newspapers, as if there was some- 
thing extraordinary in an emperor's having the 
use of his limbs ! 

' This was . an era productive of magnificent 
spectacles. Those grand exhibitions in the Royal 
Parks — the Pagoda Bridge, the Temple of Con- 
cord, the Fair, and the Lilliputian sea-fight on 
the Serpentine river were the most memorable 
scenes of this splendid and expensive national 
farccp 

Since that period, the people have been 
anmsed by processions at the general election, 
in which the brutalized mob evinced their 
savage disposition by outrageously ..insulting 
some of the candidates. They also distinguish- 
ed themselves by their reception of Henry Hunt, 
on his return from Lancashire; and evinced their 
impiety and propensity to evil, by the approba-. 
tion which they expressed of the publishing 
blasphemers on Ludgate-hill and in Fleet-street. 

The passion for public spectacles is not con- 
6m4 to the canaille, or dregs of the people, for 



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. OB, I-ONDON IN 182(X 65 

genteeL* tradesmen, handicraftsmen, and even 
professional men delight ip theatric exhibitions^ 
and are «ot only the priftcipal patrons of the minor 
play-houses, but in rnony instances expose their 
own vanity and iacapacity, as perFormers at pri- 
vate theatres. To ^nch an absurd i height, and 
extent tAo, is this most preposteroi» indulgence 
of folly and sensuality carried, that the satire of 
Petronius Arbiter is properly applici^bleto those 
ridicaloas mimics of the mimetic heroes and he- 
roines of the sock and buskin <Mi the public 
stage: 

** Mundus umverms exercet Jdstrioniam.^, 
Or, as Shakspeare has it, 

." All the world's a stage, &c." 

While engaged in these light and frivolous 
pursuits, business i3 often neglected ; and the ad- 
vmev of representations of interesting events, 
sometimes makes a figure in the (Gazette, an 
event which might have been prevented by 
industry and frugality. The fascinations of 
the stage are certainly numerous and seductive. 
There the imagination, the senses; and the 
sensual appetites, are stimulated by the oombined' 
powers of poetry, painting, music, eloquence, 
wit, humomvaentimei^' itnd the paramoiukt at-^ 



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^ THE BNGLISH MBTaOPOUS ; 

tractioM of bedizened and bepainted female 
^eaaty. 

In common life, the people are remarkable tor 
very superficial knowledge, and great vanity-n^a 
devernens and dexterity respecting their own 
boiiiaese^ bat an almosf total ignorance of litera^ 
tare, religion, or whatever dignifies and enlight- 
ens the human mind. £ven genteel tradesmen^ 
though intelligent and .obliging in eommon ocv 
currences^ are mostly defective in those acquire-^ 
meats which give a nest to conyersation, and eo# 
liven the fireside. Many of them converse 
flnently, indeed much better than they can write^ 
yet they all pretend to be critics. Occasional 
visits to the theatres give thorn a taste for dra« 
matic entertainments, and a familiarity with the 
manners, and pecqUar powers of performers, 
which embolden them to decide with a divert- 
wg dogpai^m on every hiatrionic perfoi^mance. 
Most of th^se ^gaciotts orities wonld, doahUceii 
consider H the highest presumption in a conntiy 
visitor to I^ndon, to give an opinion in eon^ 
trariely^ tQ their own; for, aoeording to their 
<? qstpo^ry ^nd favourite assertion, <^ they know 

As fpr ip^ebants, and men engaged in the 
le^ra#d fM'of s^iona, they are diMde^t in their 
cri^M^l ii^^i^imvaqd like most a£ the nobility 
V^ iS«lllr^» ^oatent thonadvoa wiilb conanUiBf 



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OE, liOIWON IN 1820, 67 

ttbeeommento on theatrieal represratatiooi, writtea 
by the literati of the daily papers, who we doubt- 
less weli i^aid by tho niAoagers of our vnrioos 
fiMe9 of public amuaenieAti for their peifsuaBive 
and woli^tinied pnSs. 

AiBooif the charaoteriiAics of the common peo* 
pie, a dispositioQ to ridicule is very geueral; 
They delight to p'iu at any unfcsfaioBable feaoh 
barity in the dreas or manners of strangers, or 
even of their own intimate friends. Hence ex* 
ttriw deganee, a pleasing address, and assumed 
coMsequenoe, operate like a pasq;iort in our inters 
course with society in London, in manysitoa* 
tions where greater accomplishments, my, ta- 
lents, woidd fail of success* 

A credulous and inexperieneed individual, on 
his first visit to LoMbn, might imagine that he had 
amved at a spot where tiie loiowledge of sdl the 
arts and scieDces wasaoqnirableTa a short tive^ 
so piawttrieavethe pretensions of different advent 
turevs, who, incited by the love of gatny or the 
pride of distinction, modeedy propose to instmet 
papMs fer a moderate reoompence. Here a lee* 
turing astronomer otfisrs to make the scienee of 
the iMfvenly bodies aa femiliarto tiM eockneyf 
as tiie vray fram Mile End to Chetpaide. A 
Weiebman professes to teach Englishmen ho^rla 
speak} a IVeachman propose* to imtonaet lir« 
Jem BM in ^ art of Masoiimg; aCterman 

2 



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68 THE ENGLISH METROPOLIS; 

will, for money, produce machinery by which 
passengers and parcels may be conveyed along^ the 
king's highway without the aid of the horse; and 
an Irishman swears, that he has discovered a mode 
of increasing the population by the proper appli- 
cation of steel as a tonic ! Indeed, this m^y well 
be termed the Age of Pretence. In the public 
and private theatres, sound is preferred to sense, 
and graceful agility to impressive action. One 
vocal performer obtains more money by the exer-*- 
ticm of her vocal powers at the Italian ope;ra^ 
than all the original authors in England, by tbeit 
utmost efforts. 

But among the pretenders, or quacks of Lon- 
don, the magnanimous Cobbett must. not be 
overlooked. His praiseworthy exertions to in- 
struct the ignorant weavers and dotton-spinnem 
of Lancashire, the i^arBmen and dyers of York- 
shire, the silk- weavers of Cheshire, the toymen 
ctf Birmingham, and the riband manufactwers of 
Coventry, entitle him to the gratitude of those 
poor, ignorant, miserable^ in^rovident beings, 
whom be so humanely returned from America 
to enrich, inform, and render at once prudent and. 
happy, by an exposure of those .arts of taxation, 
whic)i may aU be counteracted and nullified by 
abstinence. He can scarcely fail of succeels in 
persuading sottish artificers to prefer water to 
that destructive preparation known by the mfxie 



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OB, LONDON IN 1820. 59 

of beer or ale ; especially, when the pupils in thiift 
new system of political ecopomy are informed, that 
the simple element has been recommended by an 
author of such high authority as Dr. Armstrong. ' 

Learn tempVance, friends, and hear without, diadaip 
The choice of water, [ ^ 

was the advice of the Scottish Esculapius, in his 
" Art of preserving Health;" and now this pre- 
cept is enforced with irresistible eloquence, by 
that great and honourable statesman, the modest 
and erudite William Cobbett. Whatever may 
be the success of this new system in the country, 
it will require some ingenuity to prevail ove* the 
prejudices of the people of London/ whose attach- 
ment to their porter, is almost as strong as even 
tjiat to the king atid constitution. ' 

Another patriot has proposed a still bolder 
expedient for the reduction of the revenue ; and 
would fain persuade our ladies to prefer an in- 
fusion of wholesome English grass, under the 
name of hay tea, to that enervating, unpalatable, 
and dear production, of China called tea. But the 
Black Dwarf will prove himself a greater hero 
than' Jack the giant-killer, and more eloquent 
than that florid orator Phillips, if he can prevail 
so far over the habits of our lovely country-wo- 
men as to make them forego their favourite re- 
freshment, to gratify a few vain and malignant 



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60 THB BNGUSH MST&OPOLIS ; 



\ 



ampincii who are so noisy on the topic of politi* 
oal reform, while they neglect their own personal 
r^formatton. Wooler has probably been told; 
that bay tea is given with great success twice a 
day to calves ; and by a very natural inference, 
conjeetnres that it may prove equally nutritious 
to asses ; but, however delicious this beverage 
may be to bis enlightened brethren ; our elegant 
females will turn up their pretty noses at the very 
effluvia or steam of this coarse refection, and will 
continue to indulge in ** large potations/* of that 
exhilarating fluid, which haa so long contributed 
to their improvement in gossiping and gaiety. 

As for the determined proselytes of Carlile and 
Co. who while they despise the word of 6d3D| 
persist in their belief of the writings and asseitions 
of impudent atbeirts, and envious sc^iibUem, di^ 
are so wall described in the following f^assage, 
tfiat it presents a 9trong illustration of their fe^ 
rocity and presumptian. 

^ Dnring the grmd fMe given by the Spanish 
Ambassador, on the 15th of December, 1810/ 
ooe ^ the disgraces ctf tfie police of Londoef a 
gang of pickpocdtcts, beset the doors, an4 ^eo^ 
deavoured to rob amidst the confusion and^alariti 
wbk^ they created. Their yellinff and actual 
violence became at last so terrifying, thatXaren- 
der, finding all his exertions ineffectual to main^ 
taiQ the peaeof sent for the mlitary, wba^ fa6w«« 



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OMf XiONDON IN t820» 6t 

•veri did not arrive for a long time. ; Their pre*r 
senee soon restored order, and preserved it dorittg 
the rest of tlie night." 

Bttt eiren amiMig the genteel class ol m^\dtf in. 
Londcm, « T^ry ^reat luajorttjr of jouDg nsk^ 
»arri^ weny and some tboosands of heads of 
fitmiiies too, seem totalty careless, cv destitute of 
a sense ef retigioas respoasibttity. Their idea, 
of integrity I veracity, and dignity of mind seems^ 
merely to be circumscribed by the term Aoitcutr 
-^honoar, that prood bat inefficient stibstitate 
for virtue. Thos tl^se bononraUe men, break 
their engiagements^ and say they fovget thenr;^ 
an^ so* ooDskler a breach of promise as a very 
trivial nratter. They seem to live wil^ioat plsUr 
the sport of every passicm, oc: wliiaii of tfaenh 
selves^ and their gididy companions ^ and are 
tossedr aboat on the ooean^ of life, hke sfaipa 
witbeut compass, rudder^ or belmsaian, ttU t&ey 
femider ID the abyss of improdenoe and ruin* 
' In seeiet^, many of them are entertaining, and' 
seme even' interesting companions^ but ij^wm 
cotttent'vrith* the* acqufsitien^ of; siieh' snperfldi^ 
accomplishments as enable them te^ shine ihB 
mew BEieteors of fr moment; The» lB»htonable 
topi^r of^tbe day; trivial approbation of some' 
provincials plfeiyeci who stindled ap^ to town nnd^ 
beoatte slatioaipry on tie l40Bdan stage; some* 
wHtiolNki^ OP satire againet statesjaeiiii»perwerr' 



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02 THE ENGLISH METROPOLIS; 

some new melo-drama, or pantomime ; or even 
a new cut in the coat, fixes the attention of these 
men of fancy and spirit. As for immortality— a 
future state of rewards and punishment^ — or a 
belief in Divine Revelation — such topics are con- 
sidered by these lively and polite mortals, as 
▼uigar and rural ideas, totally incompatible with, 
the comfort of an evening in town, where the 
theatre or the card-table present their inex- 
haustible gratifications. 

The gradation from infidelity ^nd luxury to 
criminality is so easy and natural, that it imper- 
ceptibly becomes part of the system adopted by 
sensualists. Like the progress down a smooth 
and gradual descent, adorned on either hand with 
flowers, while the perfumed air, vibrates with the 
enchanting sounds of harmony; those ramblers 
along the path of life insensibly resign themselves 
to the idelightful illusions of an overheated ima-^ 
gination. Their wants multiply as . they pro*, 
ceed, till they become so completely helpless and 
unresisting, that oblivion interrupts, or infamy 
terminates their pernicious waste of time, trea- 
surey and health. 

Such are the delusions and miseries^ever attend- 
ant on luxurious vice ; and all those evils which . 
affect the dissolute originate. in irrelig^on* It is 
a sobject of deep regret to the man of reflection i 
to ofaserve that the Deist, whose penetratioa^hu. 



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OR, I-ONDON IN 1820. 03 

discovered such errors in th6 religion of our an* 
cestorsy sibpuld be so successful in the depravation, 
of his, fellow-creatures. : When Addison flourish- 
ed, thfe metropolis could boast of only a few 
free-thinkers ; " but. we are polished bow,'' and 
the attorney's clerk, the man milliner, nay, evea 
the waiting-maid and footman, embracing the. 
modern philosophy, deride the failh which kd 
their parents to heaven. From, the tribunal of 
impious wit there is no appeal : — ridicule is her. 
sword ; sophistry her shield ; and vain-glory her. 
reward. In short, the modish Deist denies the 
authority, and execrates the precepts of. the. 
Bijble, because it prohibits the indulgence of his. 
passions ; while, by his affectation of humanity 
^ and sentiment, he passes through life with the 
character of an accomplished gentleman, though , 
destitute of that modest dignity which ever ac^ 
companies merit. 

Were we to inquire why so many new sys- 
tems of metaphysics and ethics are promulgated 
among mankind, we should find that they or i^) 
ginate in the pride of aspiring individuals* . 
Learned pride in the philosopher, and the flatter- ^ 
ed vanity of his votaries, are the origin of pAl 
those abstruse systems of human knowledge that 
now militate against Revelation, and the happi-^ 
ness of mankind; but the yolumiuous pro^ucr-f 



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tloBcr of French, OerjnaDi and English ffe^ 
tbinkei^ and fttheirt^i will, when brought to 
the test of trcrtfa, be found to conskt of d few 
iarpiovs ideas^ expanded into^jkmg dtsserfattoM. 
These atrial castks, like Toimense eohimni$ ol 
okNidS) will, when e^tpofi^d to the pervading raya^ 
of oonuDon seme, ef iiporafte into thin air. 

Witfawt a God, the universe would be M 
dteary at our s^dleai wil^oi a sun. Th^ c^om^ 
fo9taMe idMr of his^ presiding Providenee, enables^ 
tbe believer to alruggle with adversity^ and to 
Impe amidl the moet disfeouraging eircamstafice^. 
On the other band, the atheist, who has erected 
forhittiielf a faneiftil edifiee of hnnfan perfection, 
and w1d(H trusting to hi» own sagacity and exei^-^ 
tfotts^ finds to his inetpressible woe that his . 
prmd notions were unfounded, either sinks in4o 
tbe^ torpor of imbecility, orrises fo* the fren^sy of 
despair ; and often flies to self-^nurdef m- a M^ 
fn^e from reflection ! 

Athfeists^ look around ! behold the wemdetn 
ol Creatrive Wisdom^ in the heavens^ and the 
eanfr; contemplate the streretuite o# the humatt^ 
frame'^Mie fti^ulties of the mind-; and e^cfoimr 
i!>i#) Bavfd, » Fearfully and wonderftiHy am I 
maidier Do not iminously ewpfof your en-- 
dowthents in opposrCiofir tit the nrrealed wilFof 
the h e ntfii c ettt Ctirer of Kfe and reason^ iictnof 



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OB, LONDON IN 1820. 65 

mSO iingratefuUy j but, with meltiiig hearts, fall 
' prostrate and repentiog before your omnipotent 

Creator. 
A more formidable and ingfenious sect of spe- 

culatists has enoerged into public observation. 

These sages adapt their system to the natural 

propensities of the human heart. .By, rejecting 
and deriding the moral precepts, which eiijoin 
aelf-denial, and by artfully cherishing the passions, 
tiiey enchaot their votaries, who extol them as 
demi-gods. 

Our modish , sages, with an ingenuity and ef- 
frontery unknown to the ancients, have combined 
the pride of the stoic with the voluptuousness of 
the epicurean ; and at once gratify their prose- 
lytes with the idea, that . they are pursuing the 
dictates of virtue, while yieldiji^ to t;he impulse 
of every desire. Hence tlieir popularity, and the 
pernicious effects of their sophistry on the morale 
of the community. 

Thus vice has not only assumed th^ garb, bqt 
even the sentiments of virtue !. Under the plausir ' 
ble name of refinement, the most aboininable 
sensuality allurcts the unsuspecting ipind both in 
the closet and tjbe theatre — in the drama, novels, 
wd philosophical pqblicatioqs of tha day. Did 
AQF fashionable iufidels ^llow themselves to ex« 
praise dieir own reason, t^y wQuld d^poyer, that . 
iiistefid of thinking indep^ently, th^y are the 



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69 TH^ ifiiirGUSH MfiTmoPOLis; 

ttidst diq^tstiti(ms of DfK>rt«ils ! Misled by the elo- 
qMtit BtfpinMrj of a few ptoiid modern tTibminnfit 
tbey are neither free in thought nor action, but 
led captive by their tyrannic appetites. 

The fi^ethinkefs of the last century, botk 
French and Eng^lish, endeavoured to depreciate 
the Christian religion, by impudently asserting 
that it was rn vented by statesmen to overawe tli€ 
eredtilotts multitude, and render them obedient 
to human laws. But the infidels of the present 
day have gone farther, add contend that our 
established religion is erubveTsivjB of morality! 
The exertions of certain English atheists and 
deists, i6r they are of the same fraternity, are 
unremitted; and to gross^ is their presumptuoito 
infatuation, that they will toflbr any penalty fa^ 
ther than acknowledge tbtir ^rror. 
^ As ehuf'ch and state ar^ established by law in 
this country, the Reformers, as they modestly 
term themselves, at once aim at the subversion bf 
all political and rdigloos distinctions ; and under 
the plausible semblance of univemal liberty, iiot 
only cfaeridba disposition to licdntiossness, but to 
gross immot-ality, ajid horrid impiety^ in tht, 
Ihindil of their ignorant partisans. 

A free people, and such the BngUiih now 
are, notWithstandit^g the assettion^ of CobbMtt^ 
Woofer, Hmit, Cartwright, arid ^te th^ bold 
iaobhoune, io the contrary, Aft apt ^ cenMM 

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OWL, LCHfDON 13X 1820. ^ 

thoti who eiercise autbc^rity ovir tfaenk, lK)wa?Qr 
. moderatelj admiDiirfcered* Yet the hirtory of 
Englaffd affords niahy proof$, that the natkm hiis 
also been prompt m Ihe eKpreinmtt of their appro- 
liatnHi of any act of patriotisib by the Prioc^ or 
the Senate. The aristocratiml part of our \sh 
gisIatiHre indeed, derives its right to ^saist in tb^ 
€fiaictaient of laws, irom hereditary custom,. aiMl 
to the honour of the House of Peers, be it men- 
tioned, that they have, in many instances, beea 
tenadous of the people's right!, and identified 
them with their own. As for tibe House of Cofb^ 
oidns, though sotne abtises baVe ct^ ifito th* 
represeritatioui the majority of the county nsem- 
b^r% whether on the mAe of the Ministry, or the 
OpposktoU) are men of edncatiout tutegrity, md 
fbrttane^ The damodr about pariitimetitary re-^ 
foran, by 9^ few adventurous egolistal awl dema<» 
gogoes, aad the bold assertions of a fbw scribe 
Uin^paitiphleteei's, are therdbre not^oiiiy untru)?^ 
bht ^ngefous. It is an easy matter tbe)cetfee 
tbci evil passions of an igtiot*ant and envious po» 
pddace, but not so easy to keep them within legal 
bounds; bence the present Ministry have been 
compelled to make some encroachments on our 
political constitution, for the preservation of pub- 
lic tranquillity. 

The servants of the Crown are responsible to 
the King and the people for their pjablic ac« 

s2 



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eS THE ENGLISH MBTROFOUS ; 

tions, and th(By have, in general, performed their 
political duties with great cleverness and soccess. 
Their opponents, if placed in the same situa- 
tion only six months, probably would become as 
odious to the readers of certain political pamph- 
4etsf, as they now are. The Opposition indeed, 
possess in a pre-eminent degree the talent of sa- 
tire i and may be compared to reviewers; who 
can point out the errors in a new publication, 
though their own powers may be inferior to those 
of the author. But an opposition in boUi Houseti 
of Parliament, has from the sanction of custom 
be^n deemed indispensable; it has gradually 
grown up with our free constitution, and is use* 
fill. The Ministry and the Opposition may be ^ 
termed the flint and steel of British liberty ; and 
by occasional collision, produce those sparks which 
revive the flame of patriotism. By the fre- 
quency of violent contact, however. Opposition, 
like the flint, seem to have lost part of their «»a- 
teriel ; insomuch, that some of their best friends 
are apprehensive, that they will eventually be- 
come so diminished and dull, as to be incapable 
of producing either political light or heat. 



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on, LbNl>ON IN 1820. 69 

SKETCHES OF PUBLIC CHARACTERS. 

THE PINK OF NOBILITY. 

This amiable and accomplished woman^ whose 
heart beats in unison with the most generous 
emotions, has, on all occasions, evinced a superio- 
rity of intellect, combined with the most conci- 
liating urbanity. With a poetic genius, chaste 
and classic, and a taste refined by conversation 
with the most intelligent persons of both sexes, 
the pink of nobility is estimable for still greater 
perfections. It is the pride and pleasure of her 
heart to fulfil the social duties of daughter, wife, 
and mother; and happy would it be for many 
high-bred dames were they to imitate her exam- 
ple, and relinquish their chase of the phantom 
PliEASURE, which they now pursue through the 
labyrinth of life. 

The fair subject of this sketch has long been 
the patroness of genius; and if she has, in some 
instances, been attracted by the whirlpool of fa- 
shionable amusements, she ever preserved the 
dignity of virtue; and shared the frivolities of 
others, rather to avoid the imputation of singula- 
rity, than from levity of disposition. 

THE MODSBN FINE I<ABY. 

It ,is only in the serenity of retirement that 
4 



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,^0 THC EKGLIStH MliTJlOJrOUS ; 

the amiable and social qualities of womao a|^<* 
pear in their genuine lustrie. In Loncfon the 
beautiful s^x assitme an uaofalural character. 
Th^r passion for admiration, and love of plea* , 
Bure, become excessive. Not content with na- 
tural beauty, the modern fine, lady Ifsis recourse 
to art. The hairdresser supplies her with arti- 
ficial locks; the corset-maker manufactures a 
faUe bosom; apd the vender of cosmetics pre- 
pares his beautifying wash ; the light drapery of 
fashion is supplied by the mantua^maker and mil* 
liner; and the lovely dupe of vanity obscures 
her charms with artificial decorations. She eyes 
herself at the mirror; adjusts her dress, limbs, 
and deportment; and steps into the public walk, 
or the assembly, courting observation. All her 
native grace and amiable simplicity are lost in 
afi^ectation ; she rfeyels in the giddy whirl of fa. 
shionable life, at routs, masquerades, and musi- 
cal parties ; and at length finds that happiness 
** allure^s from far, but, as she follows, ^i^^.'* 

TjaE VALSTAFP OJ! KBVO&M J OB, ^N EGQTIST 
ON STILTS. 

" Will his own merit €ees.-r-This gives him pride 
That he sees more than all the world beside." 

This boaster, like his great prototype, is con* 
noced, thftt ^'the better part of valour is dis- 



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OE, I^OIfDON-JK 1820. 71 

cretion/' and has acted accordingly; for he has two 
or three times ventured his life on the immense 
ocean, to escape the fangs of the officers of justice. 
His common theme is self-praiae ; insomuch that 
even when he runs away he claims the merit of 
being the kader of Jth$ most ignorant and silly 
faction that ever disgritC0d Christendom. So 
con8u[Dm.ate is his eg^otiw^ that had the ship h^ 
sailed in encounfter^ a atorm, be would doubdeas 
have cbeer^ the mariners witb^ ** Fear not, thou 
i^arriest Caeisarr* nay, Hercul^! the modern 
iK>rrector of stiU^e errors, the fearless, hooestf and 
tlifsiaterested champion of reform. 

To a person in retirement, who perused this, 
statesman's impartial record of public events^ it 
doubtless would appear that he alone was qualified 
to regulate the political world, dedde on the 
destiny of public men, and harmonize society ia 
one general brotherhood. Yet y^hat, in reality* 
are this egotist's motives for thus assuming public 
spirit ? A m^lignaiit desire to calumniate those 
statesmen whom he envies ; a vain effort to ob- 
tain temporary popularity with the common herd; 
and an avaricious eagerness to extract the la^P 
4jqp6Me froja tb^ pod^ts of Im dupes. 



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72 THE ENGLISH METROPOLIS ; 

THE DWARF OF INNOVATION. 

<* Cunning little Isaac !" 

Next to the political enlightener of England, 
may be mentioned bis bumble imitator; for it 
has ever been customary in romance, for a giant 
to have bis attendant dwarf. In this instance, 
indeed, the imp seems almost as ingenious^ and 
fully as mischievous as the master-demon ; and 
they have both been wotiderfuUy successful in 
persuading the people to bny their sixpenn'orth 
of misrepresentation. There is a natural aptitude 
among the bulk of mankind to be gratified with 
the ridicule of their superiors in rank and for- 
tune i the satire, whether true or* false, is sure to 
please ; and the bold and unpriqcipled vilifier of 
religious and political institutions, may safely 
calculate on the success of his productions, while 
he laughs at the clergy, and.the legislators of his 
country. 

It certainly is amusing to contemplate the 
progress, and hear the pretensions of the political 
scribblers of the day. One of. them, from the 
humble situation of a common soldier, has, by 
the combination of ingenuity and impudence risen 
to the enviable pre-eminence of a common 
calumniator, and alternately loacled democrats, 



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^ OR, ioNDON IN 1820. 73 

and aristocrats, with every epithet of opprobriubi 
that his venomous malevolence could supply. 
This Falstaff of Reform, equally remarkable 
for his cowardice and his violence, reminds us^ 
by his temporising versatility, of the famous 
vicar of Bray. As for the Dwai^ of Innovation, 
he has hitherto strutted his hour; but mortal!^ 
must be his portion. His dupes cannot lonjgf 
sffibrd to pay him sixpence, veeekly, for his 
a^bortionsof malice; and he probably must re- 
cur to the practice of the black art^ ^' cease to 
write and learn to think.'* 




I'HE CASTOR ANB POIXXnC OF BLASPHEMY. 

They nobly take the high jnwt road. 
And reason dpwnward till they doubt of God. 

POPE. 

« These aspiring descendants of that Jupiter 
Tonans^ or rather, that British Beelzebub of an* 
dacious impiety, Thomas Paine, have come for- 
ward to amuse and inform the British public 
with a confidence never before exhibited in a 
court of justice. 

Castor, by his contemptible parodies, de- 
lighted those myriads of infidels with which 
London abounds. With what glee did they 
laugh at the hmAorocts application of the dogmas 



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74 THV JBNGIiTSH METEOPOLIS; 

of the church, to certaio oflicers of the state 
How witty and how wise must Castor and hii 
i»i4erling (Mills) appear to those judicious efti* 
maters x)f atheistical buffoonery ! While the 
fnatm lasted. Castor was brought before hi^ 
bettersi and acquitted of any intention to ridicule 
the religion of his country; nay^ money w^p 
coUectied for him^ as if he had been a public 
bepefactor, and certain senators were npt a$biim« 
ed.to appear among his patrons ! 
. . The success of Castor prompted Pollux to try 
his talent at blasphemy. He wrote, publishedf 
was imprisoned, tried, and condemned ! Hence 
these brethren in iniquity, however congenial 
in their sentiments and sympathies, have be^n 
very differently treated by a jury of their coun- 
trymen. Castor now holds the ascendancy, and 
continues to shine as a star of the first magnitude 
among the enlrghteners of debm and atheism; 
while poor Pollux, like the fallen archangel, 
^ his brow with thunder scarred,'* droops in 
the obscurity and incarceration, which presents 
an image, of that eternal oblivion, that he 
seems so desirous should be the portion of all 
mankind! 



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OB,, LOKPON IN ' 1820. 76 



6IMPJJCITY AND ItKFINBMSNT} OK, MOPVRN 
IMPJEtOVSMSNTS IN. F^SMAXiB SDITOATION: 
nXUSTEATBB IN A PIAI«Oai7B BSTWSBN 
MISS GATTON AND MISS WOODI«BY. 

. Miss Gojfkm. I siippoaet Matilda^ that yoa 
pass much of your tipoie in tbe cocmtry, m reading* 

;3ft«s Woodhjf. Yes, my dear^ I deliglit in 
tbe study of our best aot^rs. 

Miss Gayian. Study ! what aa unfa^ionaUa 
expression. I do oot mean study, but amusement* 
You hare, I suppose, a taste for poetry? 

Miss Woodley. Yes| I admire good poetry. 

MissGaytou. So do I, especially amatory 
pieces, such as Hammcmd's El^fies, and the 
modern producUoas of a certain sonnetteer. But 
you know-^we mast not mention these things in 
company* 

* Miss Woodky. I have made it a rule, never 
to peruse any production in the closet, which I 
should be ashamed to acknowledge in the draw* 
ing-room. 

Miss Gay tan. What a Gothic being! I pro* 
test. Miss Woodley, Vm shocked at your rusticity. 
You*U require a winter's polishing to qualify you 
for a participation in the amusements of fashion- 
able company. You must know, my dear, that 
musty morality is nearly obsolete in high life. 



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76 THE EN^GLISH METROPOLIS; 

My French governess says, she feels an aversion 
to thbse antiquated precepts, which, however 
proper they may be for the regulation of a nen- 
nery, are unfit for the consideration of people of 
fashion. 

Miss Woodley. I'm afraid that people of 
fi^hion have degenerated from the dignified 
manners of their ancestors. 

Miss GaytQn. Quite the reverse, my deai*, I 
assure you. We daily improve in all the elegant 
l^rts of life. Our milliners provide the I'aw ma- 
terials of personal decoration, and we adjust 
them. Our perfumers collect cosmetics and 
odprous Essences, and we apply them. Our book- 
sellers manufacture repositories of arts, London 
and Paris fashions, amusing tales of scandal, and 
pretty poems, and we purchase them for the 
encouragement of literature and the fine arts. 
In short, we patronise whatever contributes to 
personal or social elegance, from the invention 
of a new movement in dancing, to the philosophic 
analysis of the component parts of a con^. You 
must endeavour to elevate your taste to the 
altitude of modern refinement. 

Miss Woodley. That I shall never attempt. 
If, to be ac^complished, it is requiiute to become 
vitiated, I shall, without repining^ cherish my 
harmless simplicity of manners, and prefer the 
dictates of nature to the illusions of art. 



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OR, LONDON IN 1820. 77 

Miss Gayton. The dictates of nature! 
heavens! Matilda, you quite terrify me ! Why, 
girl, if we were to obey the dictates of nature 
we should throw ourselves into the arms of the 
first handsome fellQW we met. Your simplicity, 
as you term it, would soon make fine work in 
the fashionable world. We should bear of ladies 
rimning away with their footmen — ^lord» carrying 
ofi* cookmaids in triumph— and d&ines of high 
rank, like Mrs. Gregson, making love to their 
cpachmen. No, Matilda, as FaUts^ s^s, '^ no 
more of that, if you love me.'* 

Miss Woodky. Well, my lively cousin, since 
I find I cannot convince you of the advantage 
of simplicity, I; only beg that you will not urge 
mejto adopt your principles of refinement. 

Miss Gayton. No, my dear Matilda, no ; yoa 
are a free-born Englishwoman, and have a right 
to judge for yourself, but I have no doubt that 
jou will soon become a convert to our delightful 
system of modem elegance. Pray what's your 
(pinion of Cs4[>tain W of the guards ? we 

expect him to i^nd the evening with us. 

Miss Woodley. I only saw the gentleman 
once at my uncle's,. and therefore cannot pretend 
to judge of his merit Qr character. He seemed 
foppish, or what in your new vocabulary is 
terpned a Dandy. 

Mis^ Gayton. Ah ! that is^perfectly in cha- 



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78 THB KNOUSH MBTROFOUS} 

racter* An officer, without foppery, would be a 
jtrange kind of animal. Their d^ingf manner 
18 quite charming.*^! delight to see them look 
like heroes. 

Mks WoMey. And I hope they look like 
what they are. 

MUs OajfMk. - Who can doubt it, aftet* the 
trophies they gained at the battle of Waterloo P 
But there's young Weston^ the West India mer-^ 
ehant, a fellow polite enough I grant, but seem*- 
ingly with a bosom as frigid as the rooks of 
Nova Zembla. 

MiaB Woodley. Ihray where did you learn 
these hard names P ^ 

Mis^ Gnyt&n. From my tutor in geography, 
to be sure; don't you know, my dear, that 
young ladies are n6W taught eVery thing, by the 
most approved masters ? 

Miss Woodky. Then they most be very 
knowing indeed ! 

Miss Oayton. No doubt 6f it^ Matilda. A 
modern fine lady's, head ir the cirele of the 
sciences-*-^ terrestrial, or, if you will — a c^elei^- 
tial sphere of knowledge. 1^11 engage to find 
you a boarding school adept in fashionable ao 
complishments, who knows more than is con- 
tained in Reei^'s cumbrous and voldmitioiis Oy*' 
clopedia ! But I must defer my dissertation cW 
modem acquitements till ahotlier opportimity. 



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OR, IiOFDOH IN lt20. 79 

Miss Wwdky. Very well, my fair x^odrinr; 
from your present lectare I have learnt, that ite 
bdasted accomplishments commnnicable in Loa- 
ihin, resemble their specioas improvements in 
ardiitectura^-HSNicb as their Roman cemetit, or 
art^ials^Mj wbich^ at a distance, looks ^raod, 
but, on our approach, we observe the cracks 
and flaws which deform it ; and, like the charms 
df wumeUed ladies^ renders deformity still more 
disgosting^, because it has the semblance of gr*ce 
and beauty. 

aUAOKERT. 

Aviendo piregonado vino, yenden viaagre. 

Spanish lVover6, 

After having cried up their wine/they sell us vinegar. 

liondon, so justly celebrated for whatever can 
contribute to the comfortable and elegant ac- 
commodation of man, also abounds with such a 
Tariety of specious productions of empiricism, as 
must excite the indignant wonder of the^rational 
observer. Indeed, the credulity of the pepple, 
Aot only of this gteat city^ but of England in 
genera), respecting the healing powers of ad- 
tertised medidiiesi as well as the skill of regular 
physidauB^ is fthttost incredible. Men who, in 
the ooiamdn tfansactions of life, are prudent, 
fautious, and vigilant, lest they shMd be out- 



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80 THB ENGXJSH METROPOUS; 

witted, seem quite divested of suspicion when 
they resign themselves and their families to the 
Doctor. They very sagaciously conceive that a 
man of science who has, like a true patriotic de<- 
voted his attention to the stmcture of the human 
q^chine, who has watched over alj its move- 
ments from the 6rst period of infancy to the last 
of old age, and who has administered medicine 
in all its forms and combinations, must be xniaih 
better qualified to manage the health of bis 
neighbours than a cobler, or a tailor. Hence, 
every gentleman, nay, every genteel tradesman, 
has his family Physician, who, for an annual sum, 
engages to keep the machinery of his fire-side in 
thorough, repair, as far as human skill can 
operate. The propriety and expedience of em- 
ploying a popular physician must be evident — 
should Madam be attacked by the vapwrs 
caught over an unfortunate game at cards, or 
Miss be visited by one of those imaginary evils 
of Pandora which are nameless, because they 
never existed, the Doctor is sent for, and after 
feeling the lady's pulse, rather a critical ppera- 
tion, and viewing her tongue^ the cquforniatiou 
of which would puzzle the most experienced 
Anatomist, he prescribes a palatable mixtiim- 
from the luxurious pharmacop^ ; and she isj 
sent to bed at an ea,rly hour, as "<Ac heUme^*\ 
cine is a sound sUep.^* ,-, . , j 



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YOUNG GENTLEMAN'S 

ADVENTURES IN LQNDON; 

With Illustrations of Characters and Manners, 
Arts and Literature^ in this Metropolis* 



Edmund VERE, the son of an opulent cot- 
ton manufacturer at Spring Hill, in Lancashire, 
accompanied by his friend Mr. Wright, and a 
Mr. Bnersil, from Yorkshire, set out in a post^ 
chaise from Manchester for London in the be- 
ginning of January 1820. Mr. Vere was yet a 
minor, in the twenty-first year of his age ; his 
father had given him an introductory letter to 
his partner in trade, Mr. Bolton. The stay of 
the youth in the metropolis was limited to three 
months, and that he might enjoy all the gratifi- 
cations obtainable from polished society, five 
hundred pounds were allowed for his expenditure 
during that time. 



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82 THE ENGLISH METROPOLIS; 

On the arrival of the travellers at the Golden 
Cross, Charing Cross, Edmund proceeded in a 
hackney coach to the residence of Mr. Bolton, 
in Upper Brook-street, where he was received 
by his father's partner with the urbanity of a 
gentleman, and the cordial welcome of a friend. 
But his eager curiosity to view London was yet 
ungratified, and Mr. Bolton could hardly per- 
suade him to restrain his impatience, and defer 
his ramble till the next day. 

After breakfast, on the following morning, 
Edmund, who was an excellent pedestrian, set 
out on foot on his proposed ramble through Lon- 
don. He had predetermined to wander without 
a particular plan, rightly conceiving that he 
should derive a higher gratification from those 
incidental circumstances, and architectural beau- 
ties, which might present themselves, as it were, 
spontaneously to his observation. Consequently 
he required no impertinent leader tlirotigh the 
labyrinth of squares, streets^ lanes, and courts, 
which perpetually met hb eyes; nor was he dis- 
posed to consult engraved plans, or literary 
guides, trusting rather to his own eyes, and de- 
termined to obtain his knowledge of the topo- 
graphy 6t London, Westminster, and South- 
wark, by experience arising frokn reiterated ex« 
cursions. 

On steppijDg into the street, be inquired die 

4 



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OB^ LONDON IN 1820. 83 

\ray to St. James's Palace, of the firfiA passenger 
he met, and was directed to Bond*street^ and 
thence across Piccadilly, down St, JamesV 
street. At ten o'clock in the morning Bond- 
street was comparatively quiet, if not dull ; se- 
veral of the shopkeepers were arranging their 
merchandise in the most attractive forms to 
catch the glance of the beautiful, the gay, the 
noble, and the rich, who were soon to pass in 
such crowds through that celebrated thorough- 
fare ; and jewellery, cosmetics, silksj lace, paint- 
ings, and books, presented a pleasing variety to 
the observant eye. But Edmund had never seen 
a palace, and he passed with accelerated quick* 
ness down St. James's-street, entered the royal 
C9urt yard, and beheld a low quadrangle of mean 
brick work ! He was disappointed. ** Is this,*^ 
said he to himself, ** a meet habitation for our 
king? can the nation, with its characteristic 
magnanimity and munificence, perriiit our first 
magistrate to be so humbly lodged j or, is this 
pile considered venerable for its antiquity, and 
therefore preferred to a more magnificent edi- 
fice?'' 

The military guard stationed in this square 
now engaged the attention of Edmund. It was 
composed of veterans, men who had braved 
death in the field of battle, and victoriously sur- 
vived every conflict. The breast of each war- 
F 2 



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84 THE ENGLISH METROPOLIS; 

rior i¥ast decorated with a medal, tlie meed of 
valour for success in the decisive battle of Water- 
loo, Though no advocate for war, Edmund 
felt his heart palpitate with notional exultation. 
" These are my countrymen," said he, " how se- 
rene in peace, how invincible an war! The 
Briton, with all his foibles, is first of men, and 
Englishmen deserve the freedom and opulence 
which they possess/' H^ then passed into St. 
James's park, where several persons in various 
situations of life passed along the spacious walks, 
shaded by high over*arching elms. Tlie motley 
appearance of these passengers was amusing. 
Here the pretty affected nursery maid, imitating 
the gestures of the fine lady, led the little bloom- 
ing group of infants committed to her cane, 
while she rewarded the attention of the *^ lean 
unwash'd artificer,"' or the pensive half-pay of- 
ficer, with a gracious simper; and, like a true 
woman, seemed eager to extend her empire over 
the heart of man, whether the subject were a 
clown or a fine gentleman. There the pursy 
cit, with legs scarcely able to support his body 
corporate, though aided by a staff, waddled 
along; while the place-expectant, trimly dressed 
to attend the levee of his patron, exhibited his 
superior powers of loco-motion with a celerity 
that would have excited the envy of Captain 
Barclay, or any other walkings egotist. The 



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OR, i:x>Kl>oK IN 1820. 85 

letter carrier, the baker's boy, atnd a variety of 
industrious citizens, freely passed along, for the 
walks in the Roy^l Parks are open for the ac- 
commodation and pleasure of the public. At 
the end of the prin6ipal walk, Edmund came in 
sight of the building appropriated to the Life 
Guards; and was met by another detachment oif 
infantry, on their march to relieve the guard at 
Xhe palace. Their colours waved over the heads 
of those heroes who had so gallantly defended 
them ; white die animating sounds of martial 
music, the glitter of arms, and the regularity of 
the march, delighted a promiscuous throng of 
idle people who accompanied the soldiers. 

On passing through the arched gateway of the 
Horse Guards, Edmund came in sight of White- 
hall palace, near the front of which Charles the 
First was beheaded. The beauty of the archi'- 
tecture engaged his attention, and on inquiry he 
found that the fabric hacl formerly been the 
abode of royalty. " That/* said he, " is a pa* 
lace indeed ; how superior does it appear to the 
plain brick building appropriated to our Sove^* 
reign !" ** Yes," replied the man who bad answer*- 
ed his inquiry, '^ yet the last royal inhabitant of 
Whitehall had no reason to boast of his security ; 
the misguided and unfortunate thongh magnani- 
mous Charles miserably perished befcMre his^own 
pnlace> after a sanguinary, unsuccessful^ and un« 



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86 THE ENGLISH METROPOLIS ; 

constitutional warfare against the liberties of the 
people." " You express very independ'edt and 
bold sentiments. Sir/' said Edmund with a smile, 
" in the very precincts of the Treasury/* " Yes, 

. Sir, but my sentiments are just, because they are 
constitutional; and I^m convinced the present 
royal family of England Owe their popularity and 
security to their respect for such sentiments." 
Edmund bowed, and on looking to the right, the 
lofty square tower of Westminster Abbey pre- 
sented itself to his eye, rising majestically above 
the roofs of the circumamlnent houses. ^* Is that 
the iiower of the Abbey, Sir?** said he. " Yes/* 
replied the stranger, ** and if you have an hour to 

' spare, it will npt be misemployed in exploring 
the recesses of that ancient fabric. I would 

' willingly accompany you, but business requires 
my attendance at another part of the town, and 
you can be at no loss for a guide through Lon* 
don and Westminster, while you possess^ re^dy 
money.** . They parted, Edmund entered by the 
door which is generally left open daring the day, 
and passing along one of the aisles, in a moment 
found himself in the poet*s corner, with the statue 
of Shakspeaie before him, and hosts and ia-^ 
scripttoiis on either hand. Edmund was not en* 
thusiasticaily fond of poetry, yet it was impos« 
sible for aa Englishman with genuine feelingi, 
aUvetD naticmal fione, not to be animated with i^ 



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.on, M>Npo?i IN 1820. 87 

strong .QQiotiop Mobile be trod onthe ^ust of i^ose 
baTd9, whose geniqa had so essentially contri- 
buted to the refioemeot of language and msin- 
ners; and whose, ^ignlQ^d sentiments had by 
ado()(tiop inspired tb^tpcianlinessy ]ntrepi(|ity, \ove 
of freedopn, and reyerepce for virtue, \yhich im- 
iportalized the napi^s of legislators ^nd heroes^ 
and ^^^Ited the natipQal. character to: a pre-emi- 
nence hitherto oo^ttaiped by apy other people. 
While be gazed around, bis bosom flowed, and 
the fpoptanews ti;ibute of ajdmiratipn \}nY^t fropi 
bis l.ips, ^ Shades pf Sb^kiweare, Milton, and 
JDryden/* e^jclainoied h^ "ye wortjiies qf opr 
i^nd» ye exalters pf our i^ppcies,^hail| If frppi the 
happy regiqn. to which you doubtless have been 
^^^Itedy ye pa^f synipatbise with a copptrynum 
proud ,of that di^tipctiopy receive tbe tribute of 
approbation due to godlike genius! .Bpt what 
do I see/^ continued Eldmtpd, , looking ^ down- 
ward, <Vtbe tomb-stone of Sapiud, Johnson be- 
neath my feet ! There lies all that could parish 
of, the Christian moralist, the elegant monitor, 
and the virtuous, citi^pn^ wbjUie his works, ^aijy 
iplfrupt and enlighteii thousfands pf iotell^pt 
beings, ,and the paa^nity of prejudice ^p|d i^s- 
representatiop, ^ ][ike , ipefficipnt shells ex|4o^ipgf 
i^gainst the ,wal)s ,pf an impregn^le fprtoess, 
on^y^er^r to establish .more fir^qijy h^s jKu^trio^s 
name!*' 



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88 TtiTE ENOLT9H METROPOLIS; 

Just as Edmund had finished his soliloquy/ a 
small party of genteel young men and women 
entered the Abbey j they advanced, read the in- 
scriptionsy and made their comments. << There's 
the bust of Milton/* said one. ^* Yeis/' replied a 
young female, ** and yonder's the bu^t of Gold- 
smith, or I'm mistaken ; but as the inscription is 
in Latin, I can make nothing of it." ** Nor I," 
replied her male companion, evidently chagrined 
at his want of knowledge. ** I think it was very 
injudicious in the writer/' said another of the 
company, ** to compose the epitaph in Latin, of so 
eminent and popular an English author as Gold- 
smith." " Yet that writer whom you censure," 
said Edmund, turning to the person who spoke 
last, ** was Dr. Johnson, a man still more highly 
celebrated as an English author." ^* Well, Sir," 
said one of the young men, bowing, " we willall 
be much obliged to you if you will favouf us 
with a translation of the epitaph, which records 
the character of Goldsmith." " With pleasure," 
replied Edmund, and he immediately read the 
elegant encomium inscribed by the hand of 
friendship^ as a memorial of the worth of de* 
parted genius. The whole party, particularly 
theladies, expressed their gratification and thanks, 
and Edmund accompanied them into the body 
of the fabric, where a guide attended to shew 
th^m the curiosities of the place. 



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OR, i-oirDON IS 1820. 89 

. From the Abbey, Edmand proceeded to West- 
nunster-bridge, and for the first time bdield the 
^celebrated river Thames, which, as the tide was 
then on the ebb, did not correspond with Den- 
ham's description, 

" Though deep yet clear, though gentle yet not dull, 
Strong without rage, without b'erflowing fulL'* 

For it was then comparatively shfillovr, and its 
stream Uoged with mud, and the vi^'ions disoo- 
lorations oT the liquids thrown into it by ^yeria, 
hatters, and other manufacturers, and tihe filth of 
numerous sewers. But the architecttice of the 
bridge, on which, he stood, and those in perspec- 
tive, afibrded some gratification to Edmund, while 
numerous \i^herries, lightly gliding across the 
stream, gave animation to the scene. 
. It was now noon; the streets were crowded 
by tens of thousands of passengers on. the foot- 
ways, hastening along, some engaged in business « 
others in quest of pleasure, and a few, like Ed- 
mund, prompted by curiosity. The perpetual 
variety presented by this moving picture ; the \fe\l 
dressed multitude, passing along the footways like 
two distinct streams on each, which flowed with- 
out interruption; the regularity preserved amid ap- 
parent confusion ; and the noise and velocity of pri- 
vate carriages, and hackney-coaches, drays, carts, 
waggons, and hearses in the carriage-way, as- 



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90 a*HB UNGLISHBL MBTROPOZIS ; 

sailed tke ears of Edmund with such a din, and 
presented audi a diversity of images to hit eyes, 
that he beoame giddy, -and wasiiardLyconsoioiis 
where he \ ?a8, as he passed along Charing Gross, 
the Strand , Fleet-street, and up Ludgate iHill, 
into St Puul's Church-yard. Here he paused 
to take bri3ath, and view the exquisite beauty of 
that mag nificent Cathedral Though no archi- 
tect, be 1: lad a taste for the beauties of architect 
tnre, am d taking hi^ stand on a stone step, which 
iad into : at warehouse opposite the south weiM atigle 
of the building, he satiated his eyes with the su* 
perb di s^lay of the Grecian orders, presented by 
the.weMt'front of St. Paul's, to which the stately 
a^nd beautifully proportioned dome in the centre, 
formr;d such a superb termination. The appo- 
site illustration of Pope, instantly came into his 
recc >llection, and he concluded his survey by re- 
pea .ting, 

** When we view some well-proportioii'd dome. 
The world's just wonder, and ev'n thine, O Rome ! 
. No single parts unequally surprise, 
All comes untied to th' admiring eyes." 

As he descended into the street for the pui'pose 
of surveying the beauties of the iiiterior, be met 
his I friend and fellow traveUer Mr. W^right, who 
wil'Jb a hcmrty shake of the hand, exclaimed, 
"Well, Mr. v., I hopeyou have seen the curiosi- 
ties of London, and have now time to turn your 



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OR, LONtlON IN 1880. 91 

attention to its commerce." " 0, Sir/' said Ed- 
mund, '*! have only just sipped the flowing cop 
which curiosity presented to my lips, and suppose 
it will require a month at least, to see all the rare 
things in this world in miniature." ** That would 
be a month idty spent iiideed ; but as you have a 
right to dispose of your bwti time as you will^ I 
shall by no mean^ attempt to violate the privilegei 
But surely you may vary your gratifications by 
an agreeable interchange of business and amuse- 
ment. Will you accompany me to the Royal Ei^ 
change? Perhaps you may observe something cu- 
rious there/* fidoHifid assented, tobk tfae-arm of 
his friend, and passing quickly along the cro^vded 
footway of Cheapside, the Poultry, and Mansion- 
house-street, crossed into Cornhill, and entered 
the square of that edifice, appropriated to mer- 
cantile transactions. In its spacious piazzas, mer-^ 
chants from different parts of the globe met, and 
conversed about business. Thence they ad- 
journed to the rootns in the second story, where 
transactions to the amount of many thousands of 
pounds were concluded in a few minutes. Ed" 
mund was led by Mr. \Vright, into one of these 
rooms, and coirid not without admiration behold 
the order and precision with which business was 
conducted. From the Royal Exchange, they 
crossed the street to Tom's Coffee-house, where 
bttiinets and refection were alternately objects of 



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92 THE ENGLISH METBOPOUS ; 

attention ; and where the modera London mer^ 
chant and his provincial visitors occasionally in- 
terchanged nrntual civilities, with all the urbanity 
of the gentleman, and the cleverness of the ac-* 
complished man of business. 

Here Mi*. Wright and Edmund partoc^ of a 
flight refreshment, and our rambler, completely 
fatigued with his morning's exertions, and satis- 
fied with his first day's observations in London, 
returned in a hackney coach to Mr. Bolton's hos- 
pitable mansion. 

On his return to Mr. Bolton's, Edmund dress^ 
for dinner ; and when he came down to the par- 
lour, he was }ntroduced by Mr. Bolton to two 
gentlemen, members of the House of Commons, 
and four ladies. The person of Edmund was 
eliegant; he was of the middle size,~well propor- 
tioned, and graceful; his countenance was manly, 
open, and expressive of integrity and candour; 
his manners modest, with somewhat of rusticity, 
which rendered him still ndore interesting to the 
friend of simplicity and truth. Such was the young 
man whom Mr. Bolton introduced to his visitors 
as the son of his partner in .trade, and confiden- 
tial friend; consequently, he was admitted to the 
honour of a social intercourse with themr under the. 
most favourable circumstances. 

While the company were engaged in tbatplea* 
sing chit chat, which require^ little mental exer- 



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OR, I^ONDON IN 1820. 93 

tion, yet affords much amusemeDt, a thundering 
succession of knocks at the street door, with all 
the dexterity of the experienced footman, an- 
nounced the arrival of Lord L. This nobleman 
entered with the ease of a well bred man of the 
worlds and joined the party in conversation. In 
a few minutes three other visitors arrived ; they 
were rich merchants^from the east end of the town^ 
and behaved with the politeness of polished gen- 
tlemen, with a slight exception in the manners of 
Mr. Thrift, who had travelled on the Continent, 
and had imperceptibly acquired much of the vi« 
vacity of the Frenchman, with somewhat of the 
dogmatism of the German. 

The arrival of Sir Thomas Touchstone, a Wilt- 
shire Baronet,. Lady Touchstone, and their daugh- 
ter, completed the party, ai^d indeed rendered it 
doiiibly interesting, for Sir Thomas, a modern 
Baronet, still retained the frank and manly man- 
ners of the English Country gentleman, though 
bis wife was not a little proud of his title, and his 
daughter, Miss Letitia, was a beautiful, accom- 
plished, and most interesting girl^ possessed of 
great nataral vivacity, which had been cherished 
at a fashionable boarding school near London, 
yet sensible^ and endowed with an elevated mind» 
which admired whatever was really estimable, 
but scorned the pretensions of pride, and the va- 
nity of egotism in others. 



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04 THE JBNGUSHMl^TROPOLTS; 

In such.sociiety 09 tlii^^ the susceptible mind of 
Xldniundi rapidly improred. This was one of the 
happiest days of his life^ for his Qnassuming* man^ 
ners, and agreeable conversation, so ^ectually 
gained the esteem of the worthy Baronet, that he 
received a general invitation to visitat Park Lane. 
**My doors shall ever be open to yon, Mr. V.," 
^ said the Baronet; " our country residence is indeed 
at a considerable distance, but even when there, 
the medium of the post-ofiice, you know, will fa* 
cilitate our correspondence." Edmund expvessed 
his high sense of the honout* conferred on him by 
such an intercourse, and unintentionally casting 
a penetrating glance towards Miss Touchstone, 
exclaimed, " Who would not be proud of the privi- 
lege of visiting such a family ?" Sir Thomas 
frankly shook hands wth him, and Miss Toucb^ 
stone felt a soft blush steal over her face aud bo^ 
soiia ; called up by an indescribable emotion^ 
Ijvbich was altogether mysterious to her; nor had 
she time to analyse her feelings for the vivacity 
of a general conversation engaged her attention^ 
and required her lively remarks to give a ze^ to 
the graver observations of the gentlemen. Thus 
the elegant circle spent the pleasant hours in 

*' The full free converse of the friendly heart, ' 
Improving and improved," 

' till the midnight hour of separation^ when Hd* 



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fKR, JLOKDON IN 1830^ 95 

mund bad tbe enviable bonour to band liady 
Tducbstone and ber fair daughter into tbeif 
eoacb. Wben be retired to bis bedcbamber, the 
interesting person and accompUshments of the 
Wiltshire Barooet^s daugbtery presented i\iemh 
selves to his imagiimtion, with more for^e if pos- 
sible than the reality bad doqe ; a sentiment con- 
genial with love^ warmed bis breast for a moment, 
but the disparity of rank, like a gloomy cl<md, 
suddenly overcast the sunny scene, and be sighed 
to think that be was yet a minor Vrithout fortune, 
and that it would be a species of ni^ness to aspire 
to the bancf of Miss Touchstone. From these 
painful reflections, the friendly oblivion of sle^p 
soon relieved him. 

According to the laws of courtei^ and custom, 
£dmund went to Park Lane next morning, to pay 
bis respects to Sir Thoman Touchstone and the 
ladies. Here he was introduced to a character 
totally new to him ! a foreign baron of a prepos« 
sessing figure, and manly aspect, in which, how- 
ever, there was a degree of hauteur , by no means 
agreeable to an independent Englishman. After 
the common compliments of the morning, tlie 
conversation became animated. 

'* Well, Baron Spitzberg/' said Sir Thomas, 
^ you favoured us with an amusing description of 
Gerniany on a former occason ; we should now 
like to hear you describe England." ** Pardon 



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96 THE EKGIJSH METROPOLIS; 

me, Sir/* replied the Baron with a bow, " I am 
not yet sufficiently acquainted with the <;ountry, 
or the manners of the people, to venture an opi- 
nion on so delicate a subject." ** This is very dif- 
fident, certainly,*' said Sir '[thomas, casting a 
shrewd look at Edmund^ ** but sorely, Baron, you 
may hint the general impression on your mind 
respecting us as a nation. You have now been 
half a year in London, a city which contains indi- 
viduals from all parts of the United Kingdom.'* 
^ Why, Sir," said the Baron, with a smile of 
self-complacency, *^ the English are an industri- 
ous, pains-taking sort of people enough ; I respect 
them because their language bears an affinity to 
the German ; and nothing is wanting to render 
this country respectable but antiquity." " Anti- 
quity !" repeated Sir Thomas, with feigned sur- 
prise, ^* why, Baron, I i^uppose you'll admit that 
our Island is as old as Germany : don't you think 
they were both created at the same moment ?** 
** 0, Sir, I mean the people — you are mere in,- 
fants in genealogy, compared with the Germans." 
*.* Aye indeed !'* ** Yes, Sir Thomas," continued 
the Baron with an air of superiority and triumph, 
''our own family of the Spitzbergs, which is not 
quite so ancient as that of the Emperor of Aus^ 
tria, can trace its pedigree up to Noah ; our crest 
is the dove with the olive branch, that returned 
t?ith that symbol of security to the ark." "I 



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OK, LONDON IN 1820. 97 

vpould give half of what we are worth/' ex- 
claimed Lady Toucbstoney ^^ to be authorised to 
boast of so venerable a piece of antiquity/* 
** Then you would be the more a fool for your 
pains/' said Sir Thomas, with a smile; ''pray 
now. Madam, what superiority can you point 
out in the dove that belonged to Noah's ark, over 
the 6ying-fish which fell on the deck of the Can- 
ton, the last voyage my father made to India, 
which he immediately caught up and* adopted 
for his crest?" **What an ungracious- compari- 
son, my dear/* replied the lady, "between a 
nasty flying-fish, and a sweet cooing dove, the 
emblem of love/' ** I am honoured. Madam/' 
said the Baron, gaily, "by your compliment to my 
dove, and shall be happy to unite it with your 
flying-fish/' ** An odd conjunction truly," said 
Miss Touchstone, laughing. " Pray, Miss," said 
the disconcerted Baron, " are you skilled in he- 
raldry ?" " No, Sir, I confess my ignorance, but 
I think, that even in heraldry, whatever is prepos- 
terous should be avoided. What is your opinion, 
]M[r. Vere ?" " That I had better be silent, upon 
a subject with which I am unacquainted, Miss 
Touchstone, and leav^the elucidation to you and 
the gentleman." " Diffidence is certainly becom- 
ing in a young gentleman," said the Baron. 
"Yes, and even in a German Baron, arrived at the 
age of discretion/' said Miss Touchstone, archly* 

G 



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08 THE ENGLISH METROPOLIS; 

The Baron looked grave^ and Lady Touch^ 
stone, with whom he was a favouiite, endeavoured 
to repress the satiric gaiety of her lively daugh- 
ter. ** I must say, Letitia, that your ideas of 
rank, and the distinction due to ancient families, 
are very different from those which prevail in 
elegant society j a taste for heraldry is now very 
general, and has spread from the west to the east 
end of the town. Why, it was but the otiier 
day, liady Puff, the bankrupt publisher's wife, 
showed me the armorial bearings of the family, 
newly emblazoned, and just received from the 
College of Arms ; and what do you think they 
represented ?" " I cannot guess, Madam,*' said 
Miss Touchstone^ ^^^^y I ** something emblematic 
of honour and honesty, perhaps, as the apposite 
decoration of an adventurous bankrupt." " The 
crest was a bear and ragged staff,'' replied Lady 
Touchstone. ** That, Madam,'' said the Baron, 
*^ is a common embiem among the German 
nobility." '' Yes," said Letitia, « and I doubt 
not, but it is extremely characteristic of the qua- 
lities of the noble owners." " I bow obsequi- 
ously, Miss," cried iite Baron, with delight, '< to 
your most judicious compliment" " Aye," said 
Sir Thomas, << I believe Letitia has bit the right 
nail on the hefid." <^ She has. Sir," said the Baren ; 
^* our Ck^rman nobility are hardy and patienltKke 
the bear, rough and strong like the ri^>g<ed rtaff." 
4 



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OR^ I.ONPON IN 1820. 99 

" Admirably well explained, upon my honour/' 
exclaimed Lady Touchstone, ^* I do not think any 
of our modern poets could have given the subjects 
finer turn." " Here comes Mr. Bottom/' said 
Letitia, <' suppose we take his opinion on this pro- 
found subject. He is a ni'an of taste, discrimina- 
tion, and spirit/' 

Mr. Bottom now entered, heated, with a coun- 
tenance glowing with the effects of violent exer- 
cise; yet with an inexhaustible flow of animal 
spirits, he bouaded into the parlour, exclaiming, 
^^Xadi^s and Gentlemen, forgive my abrupt en- 
trance — ^yott know. Sir Thomas, I'm a queer fel- 
low—like nobody else — ever busy — bustling-r- 
and happy ; life is too shmt to be spent in loung- 
ing — ^I'm for doing souietbing." "Yes, Mr. 
Bottom,'^ said Letitia, in a tone of approbation, 
" and something to the purpose too." ** Why, for 
that aiatter. Miss Touchstoae, we do our share. 
This morning I aros^ at sevens — mot a sparring- 
party in the royal cockpit — rgave Lord Goosecap 
a confounded contusion in.tihe teniple, and left hioji 
in :the :hands of his surgeon^ who was busied in 
.t^ applic^ion of various emollieots to prevent 
4iacoloaratioii. But I think nature will 'prove 
too liard for chirurgijc^l skill, and the noble Lord 
m^y pass for an Irish beauty for^soqae days to 
come. .Qis tLordship swetos he would n0t for ^ 
ihousaQd guineas be ^een m^ a black ^e, u^ h^ 

02 



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100 THE ENGLISH METROPOLIS; 

is engaged to dance to-night with Miss Fitzcla- 
rion, at the Dowager Lady FuzbalFs. From the 
cockpit^ I returned to breakfast at half past eight; 
mounted my coach-box precisely at nine, and drove 
to Brentford y and back to Portman-square, a dis- 
tance of sixteen miles, in one hour, twenty mi- 
nutes, and fifty-five seconds, upon my soul !'' 
" Ah !" cried Letitia, in a tone of compassion, ** I 
pity the poor horses/* " O, Madam, the horses 
are true blood." ** And bottom too, like their 
master/' ^* I thank you, Miss Touchstone,'^ said 
Bottom, gaily, ''I thank you, my dear girl, for the 
compliment ; yes, my angel, I'm a fellow of some 
spirit, and the town shall know it ; for, to use the 
i;notto of stage-struck Coates, whik I live I mil 
croio r' " You are, indeed. Sir, a model of mo- 
dern elegance/' ^^ Nay, Letitia, don't be so sa- 
tirical. However, if our young fellows of for- 
tune would but imitate me, they would make a 
very difierent figure to what most of them do at 
present. Instead of wasting their hours at the 
public theatre, the private gaming-table, or in 
some silly amour, they might improve their health 
tind agility, by feats of horsemanship, pugilism, 
and other manly diversions, worthy of troeborn 
Englishmen. At present, there is a base dege* 
neracy among us. Notwithstanding the peace, 
our military fops continue to imitate stupid Ger- 
mans, by strutting with large swards striking their 



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OR, I-ONDON IN 1820. 101 

heels, like sotnemock hero on the boards; aDd dis- 
%aring the human form, and face by a 6er* 
mani^^ed uniform, and a ferocious stare/' *^ Do 
you know. Sir," said Spitzberg, with evident 
discomposure, " that I am a German Baron ?'^ 
"What," replied Bottom with a sneer, "the 
Baron GerambI suppose ; we have had a sufficient 
sample of German Barons." 

Sir Thonaas now interposed, and endeavoured 
to reconcile the disputants, but this unpleasant in- 
cident interrupted the harmony of the morning 
visit » though it developed the characters of two 
strange individuals to theobservatioi^ of Edmund, 
who soon afterwards retired, much gratified by 
the politeness of the Baronet, but completely cured 
of his momentary passion for the beautiful and 
accomplished Miss Touchstone, whose satirical 
wit, and high spirit, were equally uncongenial 
with his benevolent and manly disposition. 

The weather was fine, and Edmund proceeded 
to St. James> Park, that favourite resort of gen- 
teel pedestrians. He entered the walks' about 
noon, and met his friend Mr. Wright in company 
with another gentleman. This fortuitous meet- 
ing was mutually agreeable; "You have short- 
ened my morning's ramble, Mr/Yere," said Mr. 
Wright J " I intended to have gone to Mr. Bol- 
ton's^ for the purpo3e t>f introdqcing this- gentle* 
man to your acquaintauoe. His name is Brown* 



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102 THE ENGLISH METROPOLIS J 

low^ he is a native of the north of Ireland, but do 
not start at that, for he is not a wild Irishman. ' 
Twenty years intercourse with the inhabitants of 
London has tamed him ; he is now a man of the. 
world, in the best sense of the word, and well 
qualified, by his knowledge of the town, to im- 
prove yours/' Edmund thanked his friend, cor* 
dially shbok hands with Mr. Brownlow, and ex- 
pressed his wish to profit by his instructions. 
Brownlow sttiiled, saying, **The most that I can 
do for you, Sir, will be to forewarn you of the 
Inantraps, gins, and snares ^ith which you are 
surrounded wherever you turn your steps, for, 
as a modern satirist justly describes the situation 
of a young man in London, I am aware that, 

* Hourly allurements on his passions press. 
Safe in themselves, but dangerous in th'excess ; 
Here beauty woos him with expanded arms, 
Ev'n Bacchanalian madness has its charms.* " 

**I hope, Mr. Brownlow/' said Edmund, with & 
smile, *' that my state is not so perilous as the poet 
describes it ; poets ^ou know sometimes resort to 
hyperbole to give energy to sentiment/^ << That 
Mr. Brownlow is sensible of, practically,'' said 
Wright, " for, like our former traveUipg compaFi 
nion, he is an author by profession.'^ '^ And a 
satirical one," refdied Edmunds '^as I already 
perceive by his readine«3 at animadvensdcm«'^ 



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OR, LONDON IN 1820. 103 

** Why, Sir,*' said Brownlow, "if you are startled 
at my first precautionary bint, what will be your 
feelings, when I describe the vicious deformity of 
this immense receptacle of human beings? I 
.grant that London has its bright as well as its dark 
side; happy is the man, who, while he profits by 
the accommodations, the commerce, and scienti- 
fic knowledge of this great city, wisely avoids its 
bewitching plea^sures, its enervating luxuries, and 
its execrable crimes." *<^I believe,*' said Ed- 
mund, " I may entrust myself to the guidance and 
advice of this Hibernian Mentor; my prejudices 
vanish while I listen to him ; and by availing 
myself of his knowledge of the town, I may gain 
more information in one month, than I could fron(i 
my own observations in six." " Say six years,** 
exclaimed Mr. Wright ; ** and if indeed you are so 
contracted as to feel any prejudices against Irish- 
men, they will, I trust, be removed by a more in- 
timate acquaintance with this gentleman.*' Mr. 
Brownlow bowed. 

"I have a particular engagement at two 
o*clock,** continued Mr. Wright, *^ and shall now 
leave my English Telemachus under the guidance 
of his Irish Mentor.** The gentlemen laughed at 
the classical simile of their frieild, with whom 
they now parted, and proceeded to Mr. Brown* 
low's apartnients in the Inner Temple. 

** Well, Sir/^ said Mr. Brownlow, as they 



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104 THE ENGI.TSH METROPOUS ; 

sat down, " we had better proceed to business* 
I shall jiist touch a few general heads respecting 
the state of society in London, and your own 
daily observation and experience will furnish you 
with illustrations. 

'^ I need not inform you that the English Me- 
tropolis is nearly thirty miles in circumference^ 
and is computed to contain a million of inhabi- 
tants. Here every variety of complexion, from 
the healthful white and bloom of English beauty, 
to the deep sable of the African, may be seen; 
and all the variations of human disposition and 
talent may be found, from the simple innoc<snce 
of the artless country girl, just entered into her 
first service in town, to the highest refinement 
of the elegant lady, ' adorn'd with all that 
earth and heaven can bestow to make her 
amiable.' Here we observe by turns the plain, 
industrious artisan, and the enlightened and 
ibunificent nobleman and merchant ; and every 
gradation of intellectual intelligence, from the' 
rudeness and twilight of reason in the mind of 
the stable-boy, or pampered livery servant, up 
to the comprehensive wisdom of the practical 
philosopher^ and the devout theologian. 

^' As for the general characteristics of tfie com- 
mon people, they are easily perceptible. The 
love of gain is their. j^rtmum mobile^ the posses- 
sion of money, no matter bow acquired, is their 



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^OR^ LONDON IN 1820. 105 

summum honum. They are, in general, the most 
selfish beings on earth. 

'^ Among the higher classes, the love of pleasure 
is the predominant passion in London, as it is in 
all other great cities. Art is the presiding genius 
in their mansions, and nature seems totally ex* 
eluded or unknown. 

'^ Such is the fascination of pleasure, the influ^ 
ence of example, and the empire of fashion, over 
the occasional visitors to 'London, that they ea- 
gerly imitate those follies here, which they would 
have rejected with derision in the country. Thus 
the contagion of folly, and even of vice, is com- 
municated to the unwary stranger, while admir- 
ing the imposing pageantry of fashion, as the 
European traveller over the sultry and pestilential 
plains of Africa, while gazing at the gorgeous and 
approaching simoom^-is suddenly destroyed by its 
mortal i>last. 

''From this picture of the fashionable folly pre- 
dominant in London, let us just take a peep at its 
vices. But who can describe their blackness and 
enormity ! ' All the gradual shades of systematic 
crime flourish here as in a hotbed, from the first 
iniquitous efibrts of the infant pilferer, to the ex- 
ploits of the footpad, the highwayman, the house- 
breaker, the incendiary, and the murderer ! Siich 
are the tremendous gradations by which viilany 



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106 THE BN6LISM METItOPOUS ; 

arriTes at its zenith in this vk^t city, i^hich a pow- 
erful satirist has too truly described as, 

* The needy villain's general home.' ^ 

*^ But enough of this. There are other degrees 
of criminality in thiscity^ which have been glossed 
over by the address of refined sensualists, and even 
obtained temporary eclat ' by the practice of ex* 
alted personages. 

i' Among the gef[ieral follies which the majority 
of the inhabitants of London participate, by a 
kindof temporary sympathy, which for the mo- 
ment levels all distinctions, may be mentioned 
their delight in spectacles. Hence the popula- 
rity of pantomimes, whether on the stage, or in 
the streets. Whether the entertainment be Obi, 
or Cinderella, in mimetic ; or the transit of Em* 
perors and Kings in real life. The people must 
have something to gape at ; something to rouse 
their lethargic faculties into momentary admira- 
tion, woqder, and astonishtnent. Hence the 
faree of several acts, performed in high life in the 
year 1815, exceeded in popularity. Rich's famous 
pantomime of Queen Mab, which delighted the 
grown children of tftie metropolis a century ago. 

*^ From this.sombre view of civilized man in his 
highest state of refinement, let us now turn our 
attention to a more pleasing prospect^ while I try 



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OB^ I^ONDON IN 1820. 107 

ray talent as the encomiast of the most wealthy, 
celebrated, free, prosperous, and magnificent city 
in the world. 

* Babylon of old 
Not more the glory of the world than she, 
A more accomplish'd world's chief glory now/ 

^* London is indeed a place well worthy of obi- 
servation, and while adventurers from difiCerent 
parts of the United Kingdom, goaded by cnri^- 
osity, make a trip to Paris, and describe the di- 
versity of amusements and characters observable 
in that gay city, they overlook the metropolis of 
England, which presents a still greater variety of 
interesting objects, and a more perfect display of 
civilized society than any other city on the globe. 
^< In the first place, London , as the seatof govern- 
ment, has for centuries been the chief point of at- 
traction to our ambitious countrymen; as the cen- 
tre of science and literature, hither the ingenious 
resort ; and as the emporium of traffic, the manu- 
facturers and merchants of England and her de- 
pendencies, here find ample scope for speculation 
and enterprise. 

<<The facilities afforded by the post-offiee^ 
coaches, waggons, and inland navigation, have es- 
sentially promoted the prosperity of the nation ; and 
connected its inhabitjeints in one vast chain of comr 
mereial intericourse, with a precision that adtnitt 



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108 THE ENGLISH METAOPOLIS J 

scarcely of any improvement with respect to re^ 
gularity, while it is highly conducive to a conti- 
nual advancement in the universal prosperity of 
the whole community. Thus while London com- 
municates the produce of the most distant or fer- 
tile countries to provincial residents, the opulent 
manufacturers of Birmingham, Bristol, Sheffield, 
Leeds, and especially of Manchester, contribute 
to the present unparalleled splendour, magnifi- 
cence, wealth, and animation of the metropolis. 

"A journey from York or Livprpool, to London, 
two centuries ago, was considered a very fatiguing 
enterprise; and the travellers parted with their 
friends with as much solemnity as if their desti- 
nation was to a remote part of the globe. But 
with the present improved state of tlie highway, 
and the excellence and copvenience of the vehi- 
cles constructed for the accommodation of pas-» 
sengers, a journey to the capital is now considered 
as a jaunt of pleasure. 

*' At the period before mentioned, the slowly 
moving packhorse, or the still slower and more 
cumbrous waggon, passed with difficulty along 
broken and irregular roads. Now the roads are 
paved, or firnily formed of gravel j hills are le- 
velled, the packhorse is unknown, the waggon 
moves safely and with increased speed, while the 
mail and stage-coaches sweep along with the ve« 
locity of the wind; and the post-chaise, the cha« 



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OR, LONDON IN 1820. 109 

riot, and the co^ch of the nobleman, or opulent 
merchant, pass with equal expedition. 

** Vain and ignorant asserters of provincial 
prosperity, have compared the seaports of Bristol 
and Liverpool to London, but the comparison is 
that of infancy to manhood ; and unless some un- 
foreseen Calamity, such as pestilence or confla- 
gration, revisit this wonderful city, there is no 
probability, that any other town in the United 
Kingdom, nay, in the world, will ever rival Au- 
gusta, in her firmly established wealth and pre- 
eminence. 

<^Tbe merchants of London trade to every part 
of the habitable globe, their opulence is immense, 
and their integrity unimpeat:hable. With re- 
spect to their domestic establishments, many of 
them equal our nobility, with whom they fre- 
quently form matrimonial aQiances. But this 
cannot be said with truth of the merchants of any 
other part of the empire. 

*^ Most of the wealthy maniifacturers and mer- 
chants of the flourishing towns of Liverpool, 
Manchester, Leeds, and Birmingham, instead of 
commencing business with a capital transmitted 
as it were by inheritance, are the praiseworthy ar- 
chitects of their own fortune. They are, at pre- 
sent, rather the imitators than the .equals of the 
principal merchants of liondon, and in many in- 



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'^ 



IID THB ENGUSH MJQTEOFOIJS ; 

stances, on great public occasions, their liberality 
has been truly munificent. 

^'In domestic trade the superiority of London is 
evident, presenting to the observant eye, succes* 
five streets to the extent of several miles, in which 
Ijui^es of shops and warehouses are stored with the 
richest produce of every clime, and the naost use- 
ful as well as elegant productions of foreign and 
British ingenuity. 

*^ London is, to the political and commercial 
vi^orld, what the heart is to the human body. 
Here the great senate of the empire is convened, 
here the Courts of Law are opened to dispense 
jvstice and preserve order 3 and here the great 
and the gay, the wealthy and the ingenious, are 
annually collected by the inviting gratificatious 
offered to thdr minds. 

^^ A very considerable majority of our nohiliiy 
and gentry spend two-thirds of the year in Lour 
don. From the annual meeting of Parliament 
till its adjournment, the metropolis enjoys the exr 
elusive advantages arising from tb^ residence oi 
0uf senators, the officers of the Cocqrts of Law., 
tad many thousands of our opulent gentry and 
merchants, whom amusement or business attract 
to this great centre of science, ingenuity, recrea^ 
tioD jmd 'traffic. 

«* Hence London is always most interesting if 
winter and spring, and at this moment presents 



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OR, LONDON IN 1820. Ill 

such a diversity of objects and characters, as must 
satiate the most eager curiosity, and delight the 
most enlightened mind. 

'' London not only abounds in all the necessa* 
ries, but the luxuries of life. To the opulent, 
therefore, this city is a kind of terrestrial para* 
disc ; and tl^ elegant accommodations obtainable 
not only by individuals, but private faniilies, at 
the principal hotels, coffee-houses, and inns, are 
equally remarkable for their excellence, and the 
attention paid to the lodger. 

^* As for amusements, they are multiplied in 
this city, by the inventive genius of man, to an as- 
tonishing variety ; insomuch that curiosity may 
revel in a circle of recreations. The two princi-. 
pal theatres, and the Op^a House, afford the high- 
est kind of public amusement to the votaries of 
Melpomene^ Thalia, and Terpsidiore. Public 
Concerts are also frequently performed. Various 
Museuins present the rarest productions of nattii*e 
and art to the t)l)servant visitor ; and among med^ 
td gratifications afibrded by London, those of 
litterafture constitute a valuable and interesting 
part. V . 

** The far-famed lane called Paternoster RoWf 
13 the seat of the Muses in this city, and a more 
sordid, or perhaps a more filthy abode they nev6r 
inhabited, ^ifet Milton, and Pope, those favour* 
ites of tl^ Nine, were born in London ; though 



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112 THE ENGLISH METROPOLIS; 

they were indebted for none of their elevated 
conceptions to the purity of the atmosphere, and 
still less for their accommodations, to the libe- 
rality of their publishers. 

^' Among dangerous and vitiating divertise- 
ments, may be mentioned the public and private 
Masquerades, which alternately tempt juvenile 
gaiety into their dangerous labyrinths; where 
with two faces under a hood,' intrigue and seduc- 
tion revel hand in hand ; tbe fashionable nymph 
is infested with the mania of levity, and dances 
and gambols on the flowery path of infamy in 
fatal security, till scandal awakes her from the 
dream of folly." 

When IV^r., Brownlow concluded his descrip- 
tion of London, Edmund thanked him for the 
information which he had so freely cooimuni-* 
cated. " I perceive. Sir," said he, " that like 
most men of the vi^orld your sketch of civilized 
life is rather satirical ; you have observed more 
to censure thai^ commend in your intercourse with 
mankind, Mr. Brownlow, and you must forgive 
me if I continue rather sceptical."^ " Certainly, 
Sir," replied his friend; ** and in fact, a man's 
own experience is always preferable to the cau- 
tionary hints of others. But you will certainly 
escape better than any man I yet met, if you 
retain your good opinion of society in its highest 
state of civilization three months hence." ^* I 



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Otif LONDON IN 1820. 113 

bate made one obsenration on the censors of the 
human species/' said Edqfiund, ^^ ^bich has (di- 
minished the influence of their censure. They 
Seldom or never propose an efficient plan for the 
improvement of society. ]jike oi)r political re« 
formersi they talk loudtyof existing evils, with* 
out proposing a rational and practicable mode 
of peformatkm/' 

** The only way to be truly dignified, honour^ 
a<;>le,aiid li^ppy^ is to be virtuous. There is, in« 
deed, very little self-denial exerted by any mao, 
vpIio forsakes those sensual delights* wbicb bring 
disgust or disappointment, instead of anticipated 
bappiness. IM our men of rank aod Ibrtune, 
then, turn tiieir attention from the siHy pursuits 
ci fashionable dissipation, to tfie advaneeDnent of 
tSieir countrymen, in the scale of civilization. 
Many lof those spirited youn^ noblemen and gen* 
Icemen are senators. Let them deyote their 
talents to legislation, and establish the glory of 
their native land,' «pon the unshaken basis of po- 
litical integrity* Let them encourage our ma- 
nufacturers, and lend new wings, and new ener- 
gi^, 4o Che genrus of commerce; and, with a 
manly ^md pliiloso^ical excursion of their men- 
tal powers, gtanee over the habitable globe, and 
froniote 4^ reeipiiooal benefit, and ultimate fe^ 
Heity, of the gmat family of mankind. While 
engaged, ift «iH)h important improvements, they 



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114 THE ENGLISH METROPOLIS; 

will consider the indulgence of the passions and 
appetites, as unworthy of the grasp of an im- 
mortal mind/* 

This termination of Mr. Brownlow's observa- 
tions, was equally pleasing and instructive to 
Edmund, who now retired, after promising to re- 
visit his friend. 

Edmund had now been a resident in London 
about a fortnight ; and, in consequence of his in- 
troduction to persons of rank and respectability, 
had hitherto escaped the deceptive arts prac- 
tised by sharpers and demireps, to outwit raw^ 
novices from the country. He safely gratified 
his curiosity, by frequent rambles through the 
capital, visits to Museums, and general obser- 
vations on the population which passed along 
the streets, with indescribable animation and 
variety, But he had not yet seen that epitome 
of human nature, the stage ; and the appearance 
of Kean, in the. character of Hamlet, announced 
in the play-bills, first induced him to visit Drury 
Lane theatre. 

This, as will be seen in the sequel, was an 
ordeal to our young Lancasbireman, as it had 
been to thousands before *him. He came to 
London with an excellent disposition, and tem- 
perate habits ; but his passions, like those of most 
young men, were strong, and scarcely controuU 
able by reason ; his natural temperament was 



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OR, LONDON IN 1820. 116 

warm, and that ardoiir was increased by the at« 
mosphere of the metropolis. He was credulous ; 
thought every man, and woman too, whom he 
met, as good as they seemed; notwithstanding 
the precautions of his friend Brownlow, he 
was unable to discriminate sincerity from dis- 
simulation, or truth from error; and, in this 
perilous state of inexperience, he but too soon 
epcountered the deceptive arts and villanies of 
London. 



EDMUND AT THE PLATHOUS^. 

In the evening, Edmund went to the theatre 
in Drury Lane, and, for the first time, beheld 
Hamlet Prince of Denmark, properly repre- 
sented. The appropriate scenery, harmonious 
band in the or^h^stra, and histrionic skill exhi- 
bited by the performers, were new, attractive, 
and delightful to the stranger ; and the appear- 
ance of the audience constituted no small part 
of the entertainment to Edmund, who had never 
beheld so numerous an assemblage of beautiful 
ladies. As he sat admiring the various and in- 
teresting objects, both on and off the stage, a 
'young lady of superior beauty, who sat in the same 
box in company with a gentleman, became the 
particular object of his attention. She seemed to 

MS 



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11(5 THi: ENGLTSH MITTROPOUS ; 

foe about twenty, was dressed in tlie highest 
style of fashion, and, by the ease of her manners 
and attitudes, had acquired all the graces, which 
art could superadd to the endowments of na- 
ture. 

The heart of Edmund throbbed with a new 
sensation, while he gazed upon this beauteous 
object;, she soon perceived his emotion, so 
strongly pourtrayed in his expressive counte-. 
nance; and, as her male companion in a few 
ininutes retired, an opportunity, seeminj^ly pro- 
pitious, was thus afforded for conversation. En- 
couraged by the fascinating smile of triumphant 
beauty, which played lightly over the feaitures of 
the &ir incognita, Edmund ventured to address 
ber between the acts, and the soft modulations 
of her voice, added a charm to the taste she dis- 
j^yed in her observations on the performance. 
The candow of Edpaund, and her dignified urba- 
nity, were so completely in unison, thi^ when 
the Curtain fell, and a footman appeared, to 
attend the lady to her coach, our novice gallant^ 
tendered his services, which were as graciously 
accepted. 

When he handed the y^ung lady into her car- 
riage, be softly whispered how happy be abould 
bfe to bftve the honour of seeing her home ; «he 
nodded assent ; he bomided inte the vdiide, which 
he now considered 8u|)erior to the chariot of 



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OR, I-ONDON IN 1820. 117 

Vennsi away tbey went, and in a quarter of an 
hour, stopped at a house in Wioipole-street. 
The door was opened by a servant in iivery, and 
Edmund, who had hitherto met with no obstacle, 
bad the temerity to attend the mistress of the 
mansion, for such in reality she was, to a paHour 
elegantly furnished* 

" You will think me very free, Sir," said the 
lady, w4th a smile, ^'to admit a stranger undei 
my roof ; but there is a prepossessing candour 
in your character, which convinces n|e, that my 
confidence will not be abused. Pray sit down, 
Sir, and accept of such refresfaments, a^ fashion- 
able hospitality can afford %^' '^Ypur condescen- 
sion, Madam,'' replied the,youth, ^' has, if pos- 
sible, enchanted me more than your beauty. I 

am in elysium while in your presence." " Ah 

flatterer!" exclaimed the lady, ^^ I find you are 
already an adept in the art of compliment, but 
we are so accustomed to those words of course, 
that nobody, conversant ^ith polished society, 
can, for a moment, be misled by them." ** I proo* 
test," said Edmund with great earnestness, ^^\ 
never was more sincere in my life, and the fell- 
eitons ineidcnt, to which I ^we my present gra- 
tification, seems like enchantment." ** Then I 
mast be the sorceress,** replied the lafdy, laugh- 
Mg. *' I grant,'' con tioned she, with a more se- 
rious air, and a look of apprehension, ** that my 



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118 THE ENGLISH METROPOLIS; 

conduct has somewhat of levity in it, but what 
can be expected from a young, unprotected girl, 
left to her own discretion, or rather, her indiscre- 
tion?" "Unprotected!*' exclai(ned Edmund, with 
emphasis, " impossible! So lovely a being must 
find a protector in every manly mind. 

'Friends io all the aged you'll v^eei^ 
And lovers in the young,' " 

" I protest, Sir,** said the lady, " you are quite 
gallant ; I never heard those lines of Sheridan 
more happily applied/' •* Nor more justly,** cried 
Edmund. " Well, Sir, your partiality, is, I see, 
in the extreme; but prudence requires that our 
conversation should terminate. If my father 
should ever come to know how imprudently I 

have admitted " " Your father, madam !" 

said Edmund, ^* may I presume to inquire, who 
has the happiness to boast of such a daughter.** 
The lady looked at him with a penetrating 
glance, then, after soipe hesitation, said, ** since 
I have gone so far, an explanation is certainly 
requisite, to prevent surmises. I am, Sir,*' con- 
tinued she, speaking in a lower tone, ** the only 
daughter of the Earl of ^*****, a Scotch noble- 



man.** 



Edmund continued silent, reBecting on his 
own presumption, and the condescension, if not 
imprudence of the young lady, who now sat 



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OR, LONDON IN 1820. 119 

before him in evident confusion and distress; 
but like most young* fellows, he had a high opi* 
nion-of his personal merit, and therefore made 
the erroneous conclusion^ that his dulcinea was 
as deeply enamoured as himself. This re- 
stored confidence ; he arose, and ' respectfully 
taking* her unresisting hand, pt*es$ed it to his 
lips, and expressed his passion^ Reciprocal 
sympathy seemed to have taken possession of 
the fair bosom of Lady Frances *******' ^ the 
conversation became every moment more in- 
teresting, and the delighted £dmund obtained 
permission to revisit his mistress. 

He returned to Mr. Bolton's with all the 
secret delight of a lover, with whom hope was 
the predominant passion^ and retired to his 
pillow to indulge in a reverie of future felicity 
aad honour, in his union with the daughter of a 
peer of the realm. 

When Edmund descended to the breakfast 
parlour next morning, Mr^ Bolton pointed out the 
following paragraph in a newspaper. '^ Yester- 
day morning, at half past nine o'clock, a German 
Baron of some notoriety in the West end of thci 
town, and a young gentleman who has long been 
distinguished as a member of the four-in-hand 
club, met on Primrose Hill to determine an 
afiair of honour. The subject of the dispute* 
wius the censure pi^md by the young English- 



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Iftd THE ttKGUSH METBOMHLIS ; 

tttdn on the cotisequiential assamptions of those 
German adventurers who resort to London ; the 
gTMiid wai$ measored by the seconds, ^nd after 
ejcehanging two shots without bloodshed, the 
parties declared themselves satisfied*'* '' Bo 
much for the fire of Mr. Bottom^ and the Jierte 
df Baron Bpitzberg," said Mr* Bolton ; ** they 
trill now be the town talk for a day or two, and 
strut about among their friends with renovated 
j^^umption.*" '* I agred with you, Sir/' said 
Edmund, '^ in yom* censure of this appeal to 
urmsi and yet I do not sed how it can be avoided, 
while countenanced by the fashionable world/' 
*^ IPashioti,'' said Mr. Bolton gravely, •* can 
never justify th^ perpetration of murder, and 
what is duelling better ? But As this is a toj^o 
which h^ b^en disguised by liie ekqoedt and 
the Wke, without th^ir discovery of a radical or 
efiectual preventive, let us talk of something 
ehe% <* ]l^ray Sir^ how were you tintertained last 
.iHghl?*^ ** Never b^ter in my life»" replied 
Edmnnd; '' the tragedy was admirably per- 
ffermfed^*--*^ and the afterpiece?*' ** O Sir, it 
W«»s still more delightful to me,'" said the youth ; 
<< I tiever fett bigh^r gmtiication/' '« Well, my 
yom^ ^nd, at your time of life, theatrical re- 
p¥«seiAMidii^ may be v^ry entertaining, and per^ 
h«tps in somiB inMainees instructive ^ but it appeal 
to me^ thai W^vt ^ tfaf^ ntiiwemeMi of rofined 



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OR^ i<onsn>ON in 1^0. 121 

deciety, such as balls, gamifig> and especially the 
diyertisements of the pablic theatre, Originated 
in tbe lerity of tbe hnman mind, and the desire 
of tbe gay, the giddy, and the profligate, to for<- 
get death/" ** This is indeed a new view of 
anmseiiients to me» Sir,'' said Edmnnd;' ^ you 
may be in the right~but I see Lady and 
Miss Touebstone alighting from their eoacb» 
with feces full of expression. They probably 
are onne to commnnicate farther particulars of 
the recent duel to ^^* Bolton." ** No doobt of 
it,^' replied Mr. Boltott, *^ the incident is too im- 
portant to pass lightly away ; besides, you know, 
Mr. Bottom is tbe devoted admker of Uie young 
lady/' 

Mrs. Bolton now entered the room with h(Br 
two visitors. The gentlemen rose to reo^ve 
them; and while Mr. Bolton observed Misa 
Tondhstone with a scrutinizing eye, his wife 
said, ** My dear, we are indebted for the honour 
of this early visit to the ingenious paragraphist^ 
who has famished the tea-table withr an account 
of a duei between two gentlemen^ tbe intimate 
fiiends of Sir Thomas Touchstone* Tbe event 
has strongly afiected lady Tonchstone, who 
thoughts that a short ride ia Abe morning air 
moghjt alky her pertniiittion/* ^ Lady Toach- 
stone wafi very rights in my opinion/' said Mr* 
Boltenj ^ awl I iwiiappy to We the honour of 



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122 THK ENGLISH METR0P01.IS; 

her company» with her daughter, at oor breaks 
fast table/' 

During breakfast, Mi^. Bolton endeavoured to 
turn the attention of his visitors to commoD 
topics, such as the mildness of the present winter, 
the generally pacific state of the civilized world, 
the hope of commercial prosperity, and eon* 
sequent aggrandizement of England, and the 
advantages which might be derived by the in- 
habitants of London from the visits of ingenioiis 
foreigners. ** I wish those foreigners would 
stay at home,'' said Miss Touchstone with a sigh ; 
** their presumption is intolerable, and no 
Englishman of spirit can listen unmoved to their 
egotism.'' " Come, my dear," said Lady Touch- 
stone, ^* don't be too severe in your remarks on 
foreigners. The very duel which caused both 
of us such inquietude, originated in the rashness 
of Mr. Bottom. He might have let Baron 
Spitzberg vaunt without interruption." ^* No, 
Madam/' said the daughter, ^^ Bottoni was cer- 
tainly correct in repressing the vanity of the 
German, though it might have cost him his life.'' 
" I think, ladies," said Mr. Bolton, « both the 
gentlemen were too much under the influence of 
the amor patria^ and literally ventured their 
lives for the honour of their country. I'm glad, 
however, that they endured the ordeal without 
injury.^' This remark illumined the faces of 



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OB» I.ONBON IN 1820. 123 

the ladies with a smile of satisfaction, and soon 
afterwards, Mrs. Bolton accompanied her female 
friends in their morning visit to a lady at Ken- 
sington, while Mr. Bolton and Edmund set out 
on foot, the one to transact business in the city, 
and the other to amuse himself by a glance at 
the morning papers in the Chapter Coffee-house. 

THE DANGER OF INEXPERIENCE. 

The Chapter Coffee-house has long been a 
noted place of resorti not only for men of bust* 
ness, but those of the learned professions. There 
the late Dr. Buchan read the newspapers, pre- 
scribed to his patients occasionally, and often 
gratuitously, when the circumstances of the ap-* 
plicant required the aid of his benevolence ; and 
there many a musing bard and proseman have 
composed their spirits over a refreshing cup of, 

" ColFee, that makes the politician wise, 

And see through all things with his half-shut eyes;" 

before they ventured to attend the levee of those 
Hesperian Dragons, the sagacious publishers of 
Paternoster Row ! 

While Edmund was smiling at one of those 
witticism^, with which the morning pajpers 
abound, a young geptlen^an of a most prepos- 
sessing aspect seated himself in the same box, 



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124 THV ENGUSH METROPOLIS ; 

ami turniug over the papers with a quick hand 
and rapid glance, said, ^* There's no news this 
morning." *^ Nothing remarkable. Sir/' said 
Edmund, handing him the paper which had en^ 
tertained him ; but there are some good points 
in that paragraph/' The gentlem^ read it, 
laughed, laid down the paper, and said, ** Why, 
yes Sir, the diurnal scribblers conjure up a new 
idea now and then. Vm well acquainted with 
an individual who lately came from Yorkshire, 
and was obliged to subsist for some time by the 
production of such triBes." ** Pray, Sir,'^ said 
Edmynd, ^^ what was his name ?" ** Buersil, 
Sir,'^ ^' O, my friend Buersil; but be is now 
better employed, he writes foe a monthly pobli- 
cation/' ** Do you know what he can earn on 
an average, monthly ?" *' About twenty pouncfe," 
replied Edmund. *^ Then he'll soon get rich," 
replied the stranger ; ** we have a small acconnt 
to settle, and I can now look forward with some 
hope." Did you lend him money. Sir ?" " O 
Sir, a mere trifle, about ten or twelve pounds. 
'Tis not worth talking about." «* Well Sir, this 
is liberal," continued Edmund ; *^ but if yoo are 
doubtful of re-payment, I will refund the money 
now." •* By no means, Shr," replied the stranger, 
pulling out his watch, ** I hope to have the plea- 
sure of a future interview, and must now wish 
you a good morning.'* This parting com- 



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Oil, LONDON IN 1820. 135 

(Jiment was abcofmpafiied by a graceful bow, 
add be went away', kaviog Edmund doubtfal 
whether most to disapprove of tbe uoceremonious 
manner in which he had discovered his inter- 
coorse with poor Biiersil, or admire the gentle- 
manly manner in which he declined the proffered 
rei-payment of the debt. 

When Edmufid retarned to Upper Brook 
Street, be foimd a tetW in an unkoown band, 
and sealed with a copouet. His heart danced at 
tbe sight ; be hastened to his room, and break- 
ing c^pen tbe seal, read tbe following significant 
•lines. 

**Sir, 

*< However nKUscreet I may appear in 
ibe eyes of him wiKNie esteem I desire, I am im- 
paled by my feelings to write and inform yoo, 
that my father's retorn from the coatinettt iB 
daily expected, and unless some expedient caifi 
be devised, Kmt eternal separation will eonse- 
gently be inevitable. I am engaged by the 
Duchess of *♦*♦♦** to a masqued ball te-nigbt; 
bat to-morrow evening, at six o'clock^ if you 
eome disgmsed and alone, I will seek from ymur 
#ympaliiy tbe aid of frienddbip. 

Tkns Edmund, the isuccessM and happy Ed- 



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126 THE ENGLISH METROPOLIS; 

mundy like a knight of romance, was engaged 
in the cause of a distressed damsel — and distressed 
on his account too ! Oh, how delightful to the 
vanity. of a juvenile loverJ 

He again sallied forth on a ramble through 
London, and stepping into the Chapter Coffee- 
house with . a commercial gentleman, be drank 
a cup of coffee, and beard from him a detail of 
all the occurrences which had made any noise at 
the Royal Exchange during the day. His 
friend recollecting that he had an engagement 
in a distant part of the city, hastened away, like 
a true man of business who loves punctuality, 
while Edmund remained leaning on a table in 
on^ of the boxes, with all those felicitous antici- 
pations of future happiness, wliich only successful 
lovers know. His ideal fabric of delight was 
complete, when the gentleman whom he had 
conversed with in tbe^ morning made his appear- 
ance, and carelessly expressed his satisfaction at 
this unexpected meeting. He then invited Ed- 
mund to share of a bottle of winet and be was 
not in a mood to refuse. 

When they had drunk a few glasses, a sprucely 
dressed tradesman presented his bill to the 
stranger, who muttered, " Well, Mr. Holland, 
you know I don^t like dunning ; here's a Bank 
post bill which will . be due in three days.'^ 
With these wordi^ he presented the paper, and 



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OR, I.ONDON JN 1820. 127 

Mr. Holland palling out his pocket-book, found 
that be had not money enongh to pay the 
balance. " This is provoking enough,*' ex- 
claimed the gentleman, carelessly throwing his 
Bank post bill upon the table, *^ What's to be 
done ?*' " Pray how much is the amount ?" said 
Edmund. ^* One hundred pounds,^' replied his 
new friend. Edmund immediately paid down 
the Bank notes, and put the bill, which was prer 
viously endorsed by Thomas Raymond, into his 
pocket. Mr. Raymond recollecting that he had 
an engagement, soon afterwards got up and re- 
tired, after expressing his satisfaction at the 
pleasure he received from a reciprocation of 
friendly sentiments with Mr. Vere. Eldmund 
then went to a Jeweller's in Cheapside, where 
he purchased several trinkets, intended as pre- 
sents to his two sisters, and tendered his Bank 
post bill in payment, wbich he endorsed with his 
name and place of residence at the request of 
the jeweller, who then paid him the change, x 

As he stepped out of the jeweller's shop he 
met Mr. Buersil, who expressed his satisfaction 
at this casual interview. Edmund was glad to 
see the poet, and inquired how he succeeded in 
his literary pursuits. " Beyond my hopes. Sir,'' 
was the reply ; *'.! now unite the twofold cbarac- 
teir of Author and Critic ; you see no les8\a per- 
sonage than a Reviewer before yw, Sir ; and if 



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126 THE ENGLISH METROPOLIS; 

you are desirous to become acquainted \f itii a 
formidable knot of the di^>eiiser8 of literary fame, 
I shall be proud to introduce you to the bts^ 
SBOTOMBf for that is the denomination, and a 
oaost significant one it is, which has been unani^ 
mously assumed by the members of our Club/' 
** Well," replied Edmund, smiling, ^* I shall cei^ 
tainly embrace your o0er; where and wihendo 
you meet ?" ^* At a room in the Belle Sauvag^ 
lant «acred to th^ Muses, I assure you. Sir ; and 
believe me, if you do not gain improTcment, yoii 
will at least be amused by the various cbaracters 
and critical strictures presented to your obsenra- 
tion and reflection. You thought me a severe 
satirist, at the Inn where we first met, but 
I am yet a mere babe in critical know- 
led^^e and acumen, compared wkh tliose mascu- 
line censors to whom I shall introduce you. 
To-oight is appointed iov our next meetiiig ; the 
hour eight o^dock, and if you ha^e leisure, ikin 
card wiU eosure your admittance/' Edmund took 
the card, and promised to avail himsetf of the 
privilege* He tb^ waifeed to Bii^psgate Strjeet, 
iriiere he dined willi a small p^rty of young 
merdiaats« After dinner he mentioned ins 
evening's eogagenMtit, which «Kcited the merri* 
meat of the whole party. ^ So, Mr« Yore,*" sa«d 
QQ0 of tiie company, '^ you ane determined to 
keeome the asaooiate of tfaos^ 'CraBe4>niined 

4 



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OR, I.ONDON IN 1820. 129 

poet8> poetasters, and pseudo*-critics ; bat if yoa 
will go^ be ware of contagion, for the Cacoethes scri^ 
bendi is, I am told, as infectious as the Scotch itcb» 
and. not medicable by the Edinburgh ointment* ' 
If you should unfortunately turn versifier, or ro- 
mancer, it will disqualify you for the counting- 
house> and you will find that the muses are mi^ 
serabl^ bankers," ^* That may be, Sir, but I 
am as little disposed to study the belles lettres as 
yourself, yet I own, I am somewhat desirous to 
aiee and hear this damnatory fraternity." " Ob, 
you certainly ought to keep your engagement, 
Sir,*' said his host, sarcastically ; " you seem far 
gone in the disease of criticism, and Vm appre- 
hensive a promising young merchant will be lost 
to our community.'* 

Edmund joined the laugh against himself, and 
rising with the utmost good humour, wished hi$^ 
companions a good evening, stepped into a hack- 
ney coach, and in a few minutes arrived at the 
Belle Sauvage Inn. 

THE rifERARif DISSECTORS, OR THE VANITT 
OF HYPER-CRlTieiSM. 

On presenting his card, he was conduct^ by. 
a waiter into a remote apartment, where he found 
about a 4osgen individuals seated at an oblong 
tablf, with lights and wine before them. Mr. 

I 

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.180 THE tVGU%B HBTROr^OlIS; 

Bd^rsily who had pr^fMftred the cotifipany to ex- 
pect a stranger^ introduced hhn to his cbiv^ 
socilites as bi{( friend, and the ft iend of humanity^ 
a man of eletated Hentiments and a generottn 
heartland as such, worthy of the confidence andl 
esAeetn of the Dissectors. The chairman nodded 
graciously from his elevated seat at the head of 
die table. His chair was sarmonnted by a sky* 
Wue canopy, inscribed in front with the folteW-t 
ing* appropriate line^^ in lettei^s of burnished 
gold:* 

*' Let^s carve him like a dish for the gods. 
Not hew him like a carcase fit for hounds." 

Bdiilund took Kt^ seat neirt his frietifd Bnt^r'* 
sil, and while the company joined ih some dfestil- 
tory contersattonf, of wbict the news of the day 
formed a part, he had time to make a few ob- 
servations. The chairman was a tall weH-prtf- 
po^tioned man, about fifty, with kn intelligeni 
countenance, and strong voide, a qualifi^cationf 
which was peculiarly suitable to his situation. 
Near him sat a litjtle well-dressed^ man, who by 
his broad Caledonian accent, proved his descent 
from the Land of Cakes, and directly opposite 
id hinv sat an athletic, falksttive, And hiimdrous 
dibernian. Another Milesiatv, v^ho sat lieAi* 
Mr. Btfersfl, pr^ed the elar^, whtehi he* s#oire 
was the rerf \<^ter of Hi^pbcret«^, «r <aUeHExei6r 



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ORy liONDON IK I SaO. 131 

of Ihd Mase^^and that na men could pretend to 
be a critici ^itb6ut its enlivening aid, Which not 
only improved the organs of vision, for the de- 
tection of ty^graphica! eri^ors in a btrol:, but 
actually improved the mental, while it gratified 
the corporeal taste. Another Dissector, who 
preferred Madeira wine, extolled its exhilarating 
eflfectfiv iind the probability that most of ouif bisst 
writers on ariticiim used tt for their comthbn 
beverage. ^* I have no doublf, Sir," s^d He, ad^ 
dressing tlie chairman,' '^bot Dryden wrote his 
pteftice^ and dedications under tke inspiring 
itifldeYice of this Vinous cordimK It s^ems 
txy me to be the Pierian spring to which Pope 
.diude^/ though I suspedt the little fellow vtrtis hi 
jeMi, vf\^eft^ M t^iserted^ that ^rmkirig lai^ely of 
it WM Iriemtfy to ^Ariety/* ** Is Mr. Ma^« 
Utah f^t sudb^d novice iri the noble art of critic- 
dstti,'' exclafhiled the H'iberman' v^ho eitoUed 
iiitet, <^ as^ to snipped Pop^ literatlly meant 
What' he Mid^ ? The pas^tf g^ ii^ finely figaratfVi^, 
utifd justly dcpfiliedble to the^ priAciplei^ of taste. 
TlM^ pM« dtidently mehnt by h\s illustration, 
tiiot d f^upferScial' k<noWtedgd of th« trfr of pobtry, 
hdd a' telld^ey to ih^^nt^' the imieigination io 
dtt e^ttraVagslM afnd il^l»atibnill d^i^ee of entfan* 
iliUitti, ever'^dddefife of fcl^ tttdte; but that a 
more comprehensive knowledge en^Miid the 
itikd^tf ftrdo^iM attainftfietitffiippvoved hf tm- 

12 

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132 THE ENGIJSH BCETROPOLIS ; 

son, rectified by judgment, and in short, the 
acme of the art/' He then vociferated, 

'^ A little learning is a dangerous thing, 
Drink deep, or taste not the Pierian spring ; 
There shallow draughts intoxicate the brain, 
But drinking largely sobers us again." 

<< Here,'" vociferated he, filling a bumper, 
** Here's to the memory of that prince of critics, 
Pope." " Well, Mr. Kennedy,'' said the chair- 
man, ^' you are certainly in the right ; Mr. Maw- 
man h^d made an erroneous conclusion, which I 
trust you have corrected." Mr. MaWman bowed. 
*^ At the same time, Kennedy, you seem inclined 
to follow the advice of Shakespeare in your illus* 
trations, and to ^ suit the action to the word, and 
the word to the action ;' but for the sake of the 
information which we may obtain from your 
knowledge of literature, I request in the name of 
my brother dissectors, that you will not ^ o'erstep 
the modesty of nature,' by too frequent an ap- 
plication to your bottle, till the business of the 
evening is over." " l*m all obedience, Sir," 
replied Kennedy, casting however a* longing, 
lingering look at his, bottle, ^* and as you pro- 
niised':the Society a critical Lecture on the 
popular poets of the day, we shall all be properly 
attentive." 

Thei^e was now a pause of about five miontes, 



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OB, I-ONDON IN 1820. , 133 

during which, the President arranged a few 
notes, which he held in his right hand for occa- 
sional reference. He then delivered his pro- 
mised lectare in the following words. 

Some of our modern poets have obtained tem- 
porary celebrity by their power of description^^ 
and if the public taste is so low as to approve of 
those productions, 

" Where mere description holds the place of sense,'' 

such poets as Lord Byron, Walter Scott, and 
John Wilson Croker, may fairly claim poetical 
distinction. But a nation accustomed to receive 
instruction from the sublime and harmonious 
^compositions of Milton, Pope, Dryden, and 
Cowper, will not long endure descriptive pieces 
devoid of morality. 

Most of our modern rhymsters write to gratify 
their own avarice or vanity, while they certainly 
amuse the public; but as their best productions^ 
are only descriptive of beautiful imagery or strong 
passions, they soon satiate popular taste. Such 
poets resemble a buffoon, who, while he exhibits 
his activity, excites a smile or laugh of approba- 
tipn. To the disgrace of our national taste, those 
poets, have for a short time been most admired, 
who tickled the ear and gratified the fancy, 
without improving the heart. Thus the legen- 
dary ballads of Walter Scott, were in conse- 



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184 , TH£ BNGIilSHT MET&OMMLTS; 

quence of tl^ arts of puffing r^soi^ed to by the 
pubiisbers, actually sold at tbe «norm^ii» price of 
two g^uineas apiece, thoogfc not one of them 4« 
equal in poetical beputy lo the ballad of '^ Cfaev^y 
Chase/' which is purchasable for a penny. ¥he 
p«iblisbers of Scott's poeniift might have been sar 
tisfted with a crown apiece for hi^ Mannionv 
Lady of the Lake, and Rokeby, and t^ey woald 
then have bad a better chance to suryiye the 
author. But the little Scotch versifier, though 
laaie, is not blind ; be clearly perceived Jjpiai the 
popularity of his poems arpse from thdr noFelty, 
boldness of description, and above all^ tfaeiFbigh 
price; for the public naturally eKpected thA 
wJhat was so dear must Beads be supenescelleot* 
Having thus discovered the art of pleasing, he» 
by versifying obsolete legends, availed bimfielf 
c^ pc^ular foHy and curiosity, sold his flippant 
ffaymes at a hig^ price, and, douli^less, secretly 
laughed at his patrons, as well he aiight. I shall 
here introduce a short extract from the Monthly 
Beview, in iliostration of the arts resorted to £0^ 
the purpose of profiting to the uttermost doit by 
such tempc»r^ry popularity. ** We bave," «ay 
these manly critics, in a aivuim of genuine irony, 
^< to allege against Mr. G. as a candidate (fqr 
contemporary popularity, the extraordinaiiy imsh 
of being too varied and too short in bis prodoc- 
iions. Had the ^ Ancient Mariner,^ or tbe 

a 



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OR^ LONDON IN 1820. 1^6 

^ Chnstabel,' been dilated into metrical roiB«nce8^ 
first pubiished in quarto^ (some two or three ium* 
dreyd copi^H at tiie most), and then rapidly snc^ 
ceeded by several editions, of four or five hundred 
each in oclavift-r-ar b^d one well^easqned edition 
reappeared^ like an old friend with a new face, 
with sundry fresh tiUe-pages^ even before the 
town was again empty, — wonders might have 
been worked in this way for Mr. C/s popularity* 
In the first instance, however, he compresses 
matter enough for a handsome volume into a 
two-penny pamphlet, then he scatters his Sy- 
billiq^ leaves over half a hundred perisbaUe 
newspapers and magazines/' 

Lord Byron, who fro^ his boyhood has aspired 
to the name of poet, has, doubtless, been stimu* 
lated by vanity in the production of his toneAi) 
liiapsodies. He never did, as his publisher 
Viost solemnly declares f,mTite for money; bat if 
he was stimulated by the love of fame, to bandie 
that mystic instrument, the pen, he ne^erx?om^ 
mikted a more egregioQS error. Pflme never 
^d, nor ever will admit the preteosioivi of th^ 
noble Lord ; but as a x^andidate for notoi^ietjf, he 
Hiay certainly shine for a time with Romeo 
Goates, Patriot Hunt, and other meteors, who 
diffuse an evanescent splendour in the atmo* 
sphere of this great city. Indeed, such has been 
thf greediness of this noble Author for public dis- 



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136 THE ENGLISH METROPOLlf ; 

tinction as a bard, that he exposed his social 
foibles, and made his family quarrels the town- 
talky by recording them in harmonious stanzas^, 
that might be set to music by some composer^ 
and sung by those female gossips who delight in 
scandal, and who are to be found in every class 
of civilized society. Yet with all his folly and ec- 
centricity, there are passages in his misanthropic 
Childe Harold, which command the admiration 
of the critic, for beauty of des^iption and energy 
of sentiment. But these poetic gems are rare, 
and their splendour is continually obscured by the 
gloomy misanthropy which excites horror, and 
is equally untfatural and inconsistent with the 
design of all true poetry, the proper office of 
which is to delight and instruct. In this respect 
Cowper, notwithstanding his puritanical bias, is 
superior to all his contemporaries ; no man can 
read his Task without feeling some of the sacred 
enthusiasm of the bard, and the devotidn of the 
Christian. 

But the poetical progeny of Walter Scott and 
Lord Byron, are, like their authors, born tp die. 
It is even doubtful, whether they will survive 
their fathers; and some mischievous wit may 
possibly write an elegy on their extinction. The 
principal ideas in Scott's voluminous ballads are 
evidently borrowed or pilfered from the musty 
volumes of antiquaries, and combined with a ju^ 



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1^ OR, LONDON IN 1820. 137 

dicioas intermixture of amatory sentiments, 
which gratified the superficial and ignorant pre- 
tenders to poetic taste. But the illusion has 
vanished, and the public will never again be im- 
posed upon by the appearance of a high-priced 
ballad in quarto! Lord Byron's poems, indeed, 
are comparatively ch^ap; but as vanity, not 
avarice, was probably the motive of.his Lordship, 
he left the prize of cupidity to his northern con- 
temporary, content with the rainbow of fame, 
which for a moment diffused its radiance on 
'' Fare thee Welir 

The transition from these eccentric comets of 
the muses, to that steady, if not sedative lumi- 
nary, the Poet Laureate, is easy and natural. 
Robert Soathey has undoubtedly been selected 
from the tuneful throng of poets, by the infallible 
taste of a great man, and crowned with the pate- 
protecting laurel. Southey has written some 
elegant poems in blank verse, containing beau- 
tiful passages, but occasionally disgraced by the 
absurdities of a romantic and headstrong imagi- 
nation. With the political sentiments of the 
man we have nothing to do. He is a poet, and 
a productive, careless, and conceited poet too, 
with all the errors of the character. He has 
had a f&ir share of public approbation for the 
productions of his juvenile years; but not con- 
tent with that, he aimed at pre-eminence; and 

1 



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138 THtS BNGUSH METJtOPOLIS ; 

ID his progress to the sumimt of Paj^assus, 
slipped und fell irrecoverably into the .dangerous 
abyss of incongruity and faJse taste, where he 
collected those ideal phantoms which disfigured 
bis Madoc, Curse of Kehama, and other essays 
at epic composition. 

A^ for the poetical effusions of the; Clerk of 
the Admiralty, he is literally a Croaker among 
the son;^ of Apollo ; and his eulogium pn a ipodern 
warrior, is as dull as his countryman Phijips's 
Praise of Liberty, in his " Emerald Isie." Poor 
Liberty, what miserable champions has it been 
thy curse to employ in these degenerate days! 
a Cobbatt, a Carlile, a Hone, and ^a Wooler ! 
A cause dreaded by such worthies, may fairly 
be termed desperate. 

Utility, and utility aloae, must constitute the 
▼alue of a literary production, whether in venie 
or prose. Hence, merely to amuse is tniiag 
with our existence. Some moral principle, aome 
generous sentiment of paramount importance 
must be inculcated or illuflrfj*ated. Taking this 
as the criterion, the claims of most of our poets 
** vanish ii^to air,'^ while our great contemporary 
Cowper, appears among them like an unimpaired 
«rch amid the ruins of an Abbey, or the £rm and 
majestic oak, which flourishes though surrounded 
by decaying underwood. 

Here the Presidjent ccmcluded his leoturv, aod 



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neeeived the thanks of every individiiai pneseat. 
Whan £di|iund ^rose to express bis ackuow* 
ledgofientey ha folC sonei(v4»at disconcerted j l>iit 
fiesolving to ^ive his complitnent a g^y tarn, he 
«aid, ^f Mr. President, I bwe received much gi-a^ 
ii6c^tiott from the mental repast ^hich yoa M 
ski^fntly prepwed ibr your auditory, and, in re- 
iurn; I beg Jeave to invite you and your eol- 
leaguM to the more sabstantiail refection of a 
sapper/* This offer was received with accla- 
mations, a bill of f^^e was called for, and a sup- 
per ordered to be ready at ten o'clock. The 
interinediate hour was spent in cheerful conver- 
sation ; and the snbjeot menti<)ned for discussion 
at the xiext meeting, was the merit or demerit of 
modern prose writers, with a preliminary dis- 
course by Kennedy. ** Yes, yes, my boys," ex- 
claimed the Hibernian, ^ if you supply me with 
claret to wet my wli^is<?le, you ^rhali hear a loud 
invective against bombast, delivered pretty much 
in the style which it satirizes.'' " No, no, Ken- 
nedy,'* said the Scotchman, '^ you can produce 
something better than that ; but avoid abusing 
my countrymen, as much as you can j for I'm 
a Kttle tinctured with HatiimaUty, Hke my bre- 
thren, the Edinburgh Reviewers; and was once 
or twice tempted to interrupt our President 
when he was so severe oti Watty Scott/' **0^ 
Mr. Watson,*' said \ht President, ^* you know 



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140 THE ENGLISH METROPOUS; 

that I have neither predilection nor prejudice on' 
these occasions; impartiality, truth, and taste^ 
should be the guides of the true critic ; and when* 
ever I violate s^ny of these, or deviate from com* 
' mon-sense and rectitude, I shall be thankful to 
any of my brethren, who will, by a saliHary ad- 
monition, reclaim me from the path of error/* 
" Yes, Sir,'* rejoined Mr. Watson, " we all ac- 
knowledge your candour. You know that my 
countrymen have high pretensions to literary 
eminence, and have been equally distinguished 
as original authors and critics. You know, *Dr. 
Smollett was the founder of the Critical Re-^ 
view.** '^ He may indeed have established that 
literary Journal,? cried Kennedy, " and if I 
could bring myself to believe in the Pythago- 
rean doctrine of the metempsychosis, I should 
jcertainly consider the present editor as animated 
by the spirit of that resentful and severe censor, 
whose acerbity, or rather malignity, embittered 
his own life." " Come, come, Mr, Kennedy,'* 
said the President, ^*you are too severe. You 
might, with more truth, perhaps, have applied 
your censure to the Edinburgh lUumiiSati, the 
Aurora Borealis of literature/* <^ Let them alQue* 
let them alone, my friend,** said Kennedy ; *^ if 
you raise the demon of Caledonian criticism^ all 
your powers of exorcism will not be able to lay 
him. To do them justice, however^ the, Edin- 



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OR, I-ONDON IN 1820. 141 

biirgh Reviewers have favoured the public with 
some of the most elaborate and best written 
essays on poetry and history, that have appeared 
in print during the present age ; and yet I have 
made a discovery, which Fm almost afraid to 
mention/' " What is that, what is that ?'' cried 
several dissectors at once, " Why, gentlemen, 
it. is neither more nor less than that the sagan 
cious critics of Auld Reekie, have begged, bor- 
rowed, or stolen, most of their ideas on those 
subjects from the Monthly Review. I grant/^ 
continued he, seeing his auditors look surprised, 
*^ that, like most compilers, they have made some 
improvements, and even added some ideas of their 
own ; but their additions and decorations hav^y 
in most instances, like the light ornaments of the 
florid Grothic, destroyed the sublime effect of the 
original architecture.^' The appearance of sup- 
per put an end to the conversation, and probably 
prevented a disputation between the Scottish 
and Hibernian Dissectors, 

An entertainment, in which the *^ feast of 
reasonf^ was superseded for more substantial 
fare, termipated at midnight, and Edmund went 
home, completely fatigued with the various inci- 
dents of the day. 

When he retired to his bed-chamber, he found 
a letter from Mr. Brownlow lying on his table, 
in which his friend desired an interview with 



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iii THE ]&:N^L!Aste[ }^tit<ip(yiis ; 

hint D^lt tidc^niDg^ ait bis chambers. 'kvH ih& 
^edoniinant idiea in Edmtind'si toi^d \t^^s the 
hhfag6 of Lady Frances *****♦; it had attended 
him throagbout the day, and was the last^ 6hjt^t 
6f bfs reflection^ as hisf mind gradnairy ^tfnk fi^on^ 
^6nsciousi^ess into the insensifxility of rep6!9ef. 

The passion of Edintmd wai cheri^ed hy 
tw6 6{ the moit fmwerful stimiilafnts df selWdte, 
arbbitioiiy and Ibre for ^ accomplisfaii^d ahd 
heantifui yoting woman. HertttiB his expedta-* 
tkm^ran high; h6 anticipated the sur^rh^e-dtid 
pTeasure of his kindt'ed^ wh^d ^hey sH6tild fii^ 
fhetbselves allied to nobility, and canity natili^kAy 
iMg^ested that th^ fair prized ^as( df!k€ to Mi 
ihefff. 

A Qtkt Winter's moi'ning, With rcftoafkaWy 
fnild air and pleasant snnshin^, ii^nced l^diMtind 
to visit his friend BrownloW at ati early holrf. 
Th6 tifitfA of the World had ri6t yet cdthe* doWA 
staif^, but his fertiale servant had pre^aried the 
breakfast table ; the tea-kettle Wati^ bbiTing, and 
^^the cups that cheef, bdt not inebriate/' Were 
reiatdy, at a moment's Wafniog', tditfapart' their 
CbVdiat and exhilarating influetice <d the ihafetet 
of <He apartmetit and hisf ydtithful visilfof*.' 

Edmund observed several lettSeJrtf lyi"^ 6W i 
smWlrdesk ih a corner of the room. Tfiey Were 
dii^ectedto his friend, and sealed WithiVd|)f^sjsioilis 
of the arHiorial^ bearings of taed cJf hi^h I'ank. 



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OR, LONDON IN 1820. 143 

<< doefa will dmibtless be part of my corresj^n* 
deuce/* 9«id he to biimelf, *' when Lady Franceid 
takes me to heir arms." 

While he was indulging this pleasing antici- 
pation, Mr. Brownlow entered, and wekninie^ 
him with the extended hand and cheering smile^ 
of unreserved friendship. "I find," said h6, 
'^ that yon have not so completely div^ed yoof '- 
9t\( of your rustic habits as to pass your mortu* 
ings in bed ; I must approve your early rising*^ 
though I fear it is above my imitation ; it «» now 
ten o'clock," continued he, looking at bis watch ; 
<< corner Mary, let us hav6 breakfaist/' His ser* 
vant havings set every thing \jb order, and Withid 
bis reach^ retired ; and th€ fi'iends^ enjoyed their 
morning's repast, and the pkostires of ootttenm^ 
tion without interruption, or' the presence of af 
third person. 

" Yott vnW be curious to know why 1 wis^dl 
to see ytm this inoi*tiing,'' said Mt. ttrowttldw, 
<* but an opportttiity is prtMented, for the itiftfo- 
duction of my plnpil itito the highest seen^ of 
fhirfiionable iblly and dissfpal»oiiw A scene, per<- 
baps, nel exceeded iti extravagance^ by the C!y^ 
tfaer^an and Bacehanalito orgies' of the anoietvli/^ 
''Is such an e:ihibition' pei4ect)y eotisistent wit&' 
your striM rtiorAlity, mt?'' sai4 edmotid tvifh flA' 
arch stntle. *• No, my l^iend, A^f do I wiftk y^tif 
M bedeludfil by tbe AiM^aAoft ol a specify <tf 



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144 THE ENGLISH MET&OPOIilS; 

amosement, which I consider utterly incotnpa*' 
tible with the purity of the religion we profess^ 
But curiosity as not otily a strong but an irritating 
passion ; you came to London for the express 
purpose of seeing the manners and aoMsements 
of the inhabitants ; and would undoubtedly feel 
Sonne mortification, if, in answer to the inquiries 
of your country friends, you were compelled by 
truth, to own that you had not been present at a 
fashibnable masquerade/' ^'A masquerade !^^ 
.exclaiiDfd Edmund^ while his eyes sparkled with 
vivacity, " I have long wished for an introduc- 
tion to a spectacle, which has for ages been the 
delight of the great and the gay." ^^ Yes ; but 
you must be an actor as well as a spectator ; 
the choice of character is optional ; but every 
body is expected to contribute to the amuse-, 
ment of others at this motley assemblage. 
You will behold a surprising . diversity of 
forms and liabilimrats, and hear much wit, 
mugh ribaldry, and much noq^nse. For 
once, in a person's lifetime, it may be worth, 
while to ramble through this Vanity Fair of high^ 
life: to a stranger it may appear a splendid, and 
ludicrous farce, but 1 assure you, my friend, that 
the English masquerade has long been a medium 
for intrigue, seduction, and those casual int0r- 
views between young and volatile person^ pf bot^ 
sexes, which have terminated in elopement, or- 



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OR, t-ONDON IN 1820. 145 

Crim. Con/* •* \Ye\U well^ my friend," said Ed- 
mund, gaily, ** you must be convinced, that I shall 
be in no danger of contamination, by a peep at 
the gaieties and "festivities of high life. Guided 
by my Mentor, your Teleraachus may fearlessly 
encounter the allurements of a fashionable Ca- 
lypso and her liandmaids/' 

" Here then," said Mr. Brownlow, rising, arid 
tdking a card from his desk, ** I presehVyou with 
this passport^ into the fairy-land of the masque- 
rade." Edmund read it; and found that it was 
a ticket of admission to ^he Countess of ***^*'s • 
fancy Ball, in PortmAn-square, for which eight 
faandrdd tickets had b^n issued. 

** Whatever character you assume," said Mr. , 
Brownlow, ^^ must be ^s well supported as pos- 
si^le^ and I need not hint, that as many persons of 
the highest rank will be present, it will be proper, 
if you choose a conspicuous character, such as 
that of Apollo, Mercury, Adonis, &c. to borraw 
an appropriate and splendid dress." "Be as- 
sured. Sir," said Edmund, "1 have no desire to 
personate one of the heathen deities, nor even a 
mddefn hero." "O, if you perform your part 
with spirit, you will prove as agreieable to the 
company in the character of a chimney-sweeper, ' 
or dusttiUan; sts that of Jupiter ; and if you wish 
to be more an observer than an actor, you may ' 
pot^n a domiao, and be as grave or dull as yotf * 



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146 THJJ PlffilLFSH METROPOLIS; 

pLease. For my own part, I shall r^priesent, 
wiiaty in too many iostancesy I have been in real 
life, a bluDdering wild Irishman." "Then let 
me also come as near nature as I cao/' replied 
Edmund, ^^ as a Lancashire lad. I have only tp 
study Tim Bobbin's dialect for an hour or two^ 
and I think I shall puzzle isome of your fashionr 
able friends/' 

This arrangement being agreed on, and breakr 

fast over, the friends parted, having previously 

determined to dre^s in Brownlow's chambers, 

' on the following Friday evening, and proceed 

in Mr. Bolton's coach to the masquerade. 

Edmund now recollected his promise, to visit 
Boersil, at his lodgings in £k>ugb-square. Thi- 
ther he went, sent up his name, and in ^ mor 
ment, the critic appeared, pen in hand» at tka 
head of the stairs. 

He conducted his friend to the front room in 
the second floor, wh^re Mrs. Bqersil received 
him. <<This is our Lancashire frkod," said 
Buersil, intrpdupjpg Edmimdi Hh wif^ bli(shp4, 
and that blush gavo animation tp a pretty Vf\^ 
diest countepi^iicp. Q^e of b^r sons li^ iMtlc^pt 
i^ ft CTadl^, smiiipg in ^U th^ felicity qf an ip*- 
fi^pt's dream ; w*d Ij^fore :|p;dippnd s^t dQWP, tbp, 
oft#r \iQy ept^rjed the rqpna wHb a spring, bu^ 
drew bspk on peeing a M^WPger- " Cpflae iq, 

«3f l>Qy/^ egi^^Ai^sil, *^son mm ahftkft fewdi 



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OR, LONDON IN l820. 147 

trith this gentleman, for he is oar friend.'* ** 0/* 
said the child, ** if he is a friend, I shall love 
him.** " Whj^, Chades?'* "Because our friends 
always do us good." 

From this chitdish chit-chat the gentlemeu 
retired to the critic\^ study. " You must dine 
with us to-day, Mr. Vere,** said he, " just 
in that familiar way that I dined with you at 
St. Alban'i^ ; but our fare will not be so luxu- 
rious.*' " O never mind dainties," said Edoiuhd, 
" I don't expect much to gratify the palate at 
the table of an author, but I expect a refection 
for my mental taste ; * the feast of reason, and 
tlie flow of soul.* ^ Buersil shook his head, as 
li^uch as to say, I fear youMl be disappointed, 

tie conducted Edmund into a back-room. 
** This, Sir," said he, " is my study, and my bed- 
chamber, an union not uncommon in the domes- 
tic establishment of ah author." *' So I should 
think," replied Edm^uild, " and now I recollect 
we have the bonnet nuit of M^rceir, and the 
^nightgown and slippers,* ofColman, then why 
not your*s ? But this is a very handsome apart- 
ment'.^ "Yes, Sir, and we pay a handsome 
price for the use dfiti We have tliree rooms: 
first, that which * serves us for parlour, for 
kitchen, and hail,' this apartment, and a small gar- 
ret for lumber, J^ these! pay hatf a guinea a 
week ; aye, yon may smte, tmA tCKsimild t with 

k2 



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148 THE BNGLISH METROPOMS ; 

your income } but, believe me, Sir, half a guinea 
a week is a serious sum for a common author, or 
even a critic, to pay for mere shelter/' ** Yet 
you seem contented, Mr. Buersil." " Nay, Sir, 
I am contented. My. income is about three gui- 
aeas a week for my critical productions, and 
I now and then produce an e^ay for a magazine, 
and occasional strictures on the manners of the 
age, which defray the expence of our lodging; 
my wife is an excellent economist, and I'm not 
extravagant, though I sometimes spend a crown 
at the monthly meeting of the dissectors." 

"Well, Sir,^* said Edmund, seating himself 
at.a sm^Il desk, ** I want to have, your opinion of 
that fashionable amusement, the masquerade ; I 
have a ticket of admission to a masqued ball in 
my pocket, and, as I am quite ^ stranger to this, 
modish dlvertisement, I should like some pre^ 
paratory information.*^ "I consider a masque- 
rade the school for vice,'' said . Buersil, with 
some warmth, ^* and have lately produced some 
desultory thoughts on the subject. I have, my- 
self, been an ej^e* witness to the unbounded ex- 
travagance of a multitude of persons in disguise, 
and under no controul; the sight was appalling 
to me, as affording a demonstitti^ioQ of the truth 
of Cowper*s satire. , . 

• * In oties vice is hidden with most eiase, 
: Or seen with le«0t o&noe.' " 



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OR, rONDON IN 1820. 149 

i« Pray, BaersiV said Edmund, " favour me 
with ybuf retifiarks on this amusement; they may 
be useful t6 me, and enable me to profit by your 
experience." " Here they are, Sir, very much 
at your service,** replied his friend, taking some 
papers out of a drawer. "Read them, Buer- 
sil.^^ "I shall comply,*' said Buersil, "but I 
doubt you will find the observations rather crude.*' 
" O ! let me hear them, and judge for myself.^* 

Buersil then read the following strictures on 
an amusement, which has been praised and de- 
cried according to the feelings and views of dif- 
ferent writers. 

HINTS TO MASaUERABERS. 

When we-first step into life, and paingle with 
the busy world, inexperience frequently misleads 
us into the labyrinth of indiscretion ; we credu- 
lously believe the assertions of knaves, and we 
are too apt to imitate the foppery of fools, un-- 
conscious of error, till observation enables us to 
form more just conclusions. 

In order to prevent the evils arising from cre- 
dulity and ignorance, in an intercourse with po- 
lite society, those inestimable institutions, the 
boarding schools, for young persons of both sexes, 
were originally established by patriotic indivi- 
duals. At those seminaries of affectation, young 
people gradually acquire a certain degree pf 




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150 THp BNOLISEF METROPOLIS; . 

conBdence and effrontery, while they are 
taught to disguise their genuine sentiments, and 
conceal their emotionsi that they may he quali* 
fied to associate wXh the rest of mankind on 
equal terms. 

But in many instances, even the deceptive 
manners, obtaiinabde at a fiashipnaible school, are 
found inadequate for the purj^pses ^ high life ; 
the rapidity of improvements ki every branch of 
philosophy, especiaUy the development of the 
humain powers, outrufi the attainments of thc» 
pqpiL of elegance ; and the revival of the. mas.- 
querade by enlightened adepts, has, a& it were,, 
instantaneously reBned the docile tyro, who in 
the whirlpool of vohipt«>tt8ne39, white the head 
swims, and the heart dances, becomes vitiated 
by intuition. 

This most elegant amusement, at once super- 
sedes the delay, occasioned by female timidity 
and modesty ; enables the most bashful vir- 
gin, while disguised, to shine with all the attrac- 
tions of a most finished demirep; and empowers, 
the nobleman's, or even the tradesman's, daugh- 
ter, to outshine her more scrupulous country ecu-, 
sin, as far as the noxious but beautifnl gas light 
is superior to the common lamp in resplendence. 

At those promiscuous and disorderly assem- 
blages of the curious, the youthful, the vain, the. 
wanton, and the depraved, a licentious privilege 



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0«, L0RD6W Wr 18201 i^ 

etiabtes folly to wear the cap and beil)^ wrthrecldt. 
The landing votaries of gaietfy easHy become 
the victims of vie*, and the foul contagion <iK 
impure ideas is comnmnicafed by the startled 
*ar to the throbbing bosom of indiscreet inno- 
cence. The friendty mask conceal^ thoise vul- 
gar flushings, which give such an a^pearanbe of 
guilt to the unmasked countenance, and tfi'e a^« 
tonished young girl li^tc^ns Uf the impta^sibheii 
compliments and significant inuendo^s' of iM 
man of galkntry with- t^* sileht dtlientioii 6f d' 
curious novice. 

A mas<|uertfde is indeed the s«hiifol'bf eleg%Wi¥ 
itritiation in all the mysteries of ittfenttbuinessi 
itunites the stduifiti^e dttratetibn*^ of th& tHi^lVe;' 
thfe fa^errt*, a^d the *♦»*. ^ 

By the i^iVat of tbifi^ iWfieFial (»r pfarUtttbunf 
amuseiHenV^ the- ihb^t tiitiid' youri^ Ikdy miy 
soon become an ddtoti&^ished doqUet, vi^mle 
hef reputiaCion i^eUlttins* perfectly safe fhom the^ 
insiltioust attack of the' satirist. Bveri' ttiose sbUo- 
Im^ atld« ment of sense, who Have feh tUeii" iiiferii' 
ority^ in* superfiti&t acqiitfiitioHs^, ^ile' in tfie' ftre- 
iMic^-of^pdUre coxcbn^bs; ef |im, bu^' ^itiusing^' 
bufibohr, may, by the aidef tfie mdijt)berade; shdi- 
^tenly assudser tfce^chAVtfeter ef a Wii^, ot man of 
the-w^i4dvtattie aniazbitiefat^of tb^it'iUbsi iUti> 
nktcMBndfif. 

iii>Q«rdi»^ to i6mitxb'i^^mi\^^ 



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1^ THE VNGUSH MET&OPQIiiS ; 

site assurance, the .following hintgare offered to 
tl)e considerMion of such young persons as ai;e 
ij^spired with tl^e laij^lable ambition of attptinii^ 
a proficiency in d^ science of assuming a variety 
of characters at a ma^qufrade, so as- to es:cel any 
buffoon on the English stage^ , « 

: The first and esspntial requisite of whoever ex- 
pects jtojmake.a. notorious, figure at a naasqueradoj 
is. vanity, a qp^lifica^ion in which few. young 
pqople are defiqientf fpfr .this amiable self-rlove 
seems inbye^efit in most hiimfin be^iugs^ The next 
qualification is an inordinate propensity to plee^ 
sure,, ^hic^ seems aUo in some mieasmre inborn. 
The, thirds ^hiob nal^rally. arises from the twi) 
for^fer, is an e^ul^tt^on to ,ex<jel every compeh 
titer. With these preparatory aeoompUshme^iti^ 
a^ny n^s^n of spirits Oir woman of fashion, may .be- 
come an. adept in all the artifices of vanity. > 

During the sanguinary contest with France^- 
the English m^usqoerade languiiihed ; . Imt in these 
** piping times of peace,^' we may expect a revi- 
vification of every species of licentiousness^ audi 
of those the fancy ball is: proudly proremir 
nent, as nobody but persons of high consideration 
are permitted to share those oiigies of voluptuous** 
n^s. . Yet there is sotyiethiii^ so imposing in the 
novelty of vice, that we may expect to see. this 
extravagance of ^he great aped by the liUkf and 

\91ay perhaps soon find thje columns of the Moiti- 

1 



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OR, LONBON IN 1820. 163 

ing" Post, adorned with a pompons description 
Qf the masquerade giveri by the political linen^ 
draper's wife in ***** Street, or even by Lady 
Puff, who, whatever efnmity they may feel nt the 
politics i of statesmen m office, would doubt*" 
less be proud to imitate their high-bred dam^i 
in any kind of &shionable amusement, however 
questionafete in poiisrt> of propriety lor 'morality. 

The oiiivensali^y of the gvatifitcaitibiis pSered by 
t^ masquerade, mtist ever se6«ri^'it»'SUperiority 
over all other indentions' to^ Viti^e mankiad.' It 
presents^ siHdh a variety' of pleasurable, objects, 
and 'Coo[imcinicatie&: iudb « voliiptuoi^ ' s^is^tioiw. 
to the mind^ that it'inay-foe/coiiiplared^lto^tlie 
den of JCirce, or the song qf' th^<. ^Syrens»l 
Nay, it seems to combine the powers of these: 
enchanters, and may be tei^niedi Old Nick's 
gialvanic battel^, wbicli not only ^ects the 
nerves and muadds of :the maskjuenlkder, but 
subdues for the moment all sense t of shame, and 
all idea»iof decency w Like the (klirlaim of a 
fever, it fills • the imagtnatioii y^Hhi ten thousand 
fanta^ic ideas, till a. lucid interval, and a sound 
sleep restores the votary 6f .Gomus to reason. 
He may then laugh at his own folly ilnd the 
levity of 6tfa®rs, but .my think himself fortcAate 
if he escape the snares of wiAtonneiss with an un* , 
contaminiited heart. 

'' Sudv Sir,^^ said Buei^ili dosing his papers. 



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1^4 THE S»96IJ^H MBTBOFOUS; 

^f are my rewarka on inasqiaeradiDg.'' <* I con- 
fess/' repUt4 E^cHid) *' that I was a4 first 
• rather unable to learn whether you approved or 
dilsnpproVed the excesses of tbe roCaries of plea*- 
sQfe at this grand aarniv^l of sportrve gaiety ; as 
y^M f^rdeeededy I disdovered that your strictiireti 
were irbntcal < censure ita th^ giiise of praise» 
but the) eonolusion^ no man ooiild misjMderstand. 
'Yi^a wiM patfdda itey however, BuenM^^for beiiig 
somewhat scepUca:! in this instiincd, and peroiit 
me to see and jttt%e for myself." . 

Tbe.geiltleme& we to ndw toM that dinner wa^ 
veady, and %heyshtn^d a-Mg^ and; wbdesdme 
meal prorided' by Mrs; Btiemily ^ho thodghA 
herself higMy honoured by faer quest's ctodescen* 
sioow f 

Bar tlhHigrht fidooKindf waa gratified by the 
swh^le^ mfitoners' addc cabdtor of Mrs. Buersily 
atidf tbe pkayMnvsR and prattle of her boy, who^ 
^ew nMird conftdent ai^ be becimeie' more famit^ 
Ikr* widv' the steang^er'; yet as^ tha hoin^ apl^ 
pMDMshed^ fin^hif interview wilih Lady Frainces^^ 
hts^ l^atnbi inattei^ve to surrbandingi objceta^ 
Tkia wai^ 'petKieiVetift by: Bueriiiil/ "^^ m^ 
pocikig'thal; tl^ presewf societyi^as iHcsome tb^ 
hilt i^sttoi^, propotieil a waUs. Sdnmn^ a^reect^* 
a«di they sattieiiHtitn ther streetr; 

As the weather was uncoilitiMitff ftttbi' tfod^ 
tkfy^ \¥€te aAiVe' pede^MMsj^^ Ibey po^^moA to 



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OR, LONDON IN 1820. 15d 

ilrixik tea at Highgate, and Fetur» to to^nJii 
a post-cha^ise. The walk, up li»e hill wvb 
toilsome f and when tbey arrived at tlie imm«* 
oait, the tmn wa^ setting, and dit^f>layied to great 
advantage the s|atel ^ cupola of £l I^i«ii'.*<v riding 
magnificently above the surroundmg. ^Udidg^^ 
while loi^ limes of streets, ta the e^iteni of s^e- 
ralmiks, and cloodstof sBH)ke and vapo«HrH.caitw 
ried to the souAh-east, gpive ai suUdWte idea )0^,lbd 
vaatoess of the psetropol is. . i 

^ The principal inntaffofrded them^ the li^ht atvdl 
elegant relreshmejiA of tea<; itl» cheerio g imfla^ 
encc' completely restored theilr ammall sfN^rit^^ and 
eidrivenad conversatioi>9 so thai the fime pasted 
imperceptibly away till seven o*4lock> when (riiet 
chaise which they had ordleredf was k% afttendfllnce} 
at the minute, and in half arh k«Rir they srrniT^di 
ai the QuDMNiitts, Coveot G^anrdeor^ Hei^ thai 
friends^ part^ted/ Mr. Buerail lattvin^ aiv euga^ge*^ 
meat for the reiii4i^nder of the etv^ninrg^ and Dd^' 
imind weat^ to the theatre pi]rp0tiely> feo) kxU thue. 
While he sat in one of the bocids taw€Htb th& 
tej^mination of the piky, \» beheld* a ^mitig Uttif 
veiled, in an adjacent beiC| whose fi|^ire) rBaam*' 
Ued^ that ei Lady Franoesj To> tAns> oJbjiecfc lis 
atteotionr ^Ma» nojw seleTy direcfodi;* slm M^as ill' 
company wtthi a; y<MMig gentteonanf^whoiseeiitjNU' 
highly rddyigbt«d$^ ami fthofl^gkthey^taiktedt igrs^** 



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166 THB ENOLlSH MtrTROI^DMS ; 

I 

low tone, the sound of the lady^s 'Voice iihtne- 
diately brought, the harmonibus accents of his 
mistress to his recollection. He arose to aiScer- 
tain the fact, bat when |ie entered the box where 
he expected to ^nd her^ she and her companibn 
bad disappeared. 

Jealousy, that most unpleasant of all the hutn^n 
passions, now, for the first time, -agitated the 
bosom of Edmund. . He retired precipitately 
from the play-house to a tavern, and-thoagh ha^ 
bitually temperate, ordered a bottle of wme. 
But the juice of the grape could not allevidfte the 
anxiety of his mind. It was now ten o^clock, 
and he had to dress for the intervieiw with bis 
fair mistress. He ordered a hackney-coach, and 
on his arrival at Mr. Bolton's, hastened to bis 
room without going into the parlour. His well- 
formed person and youthful countenance, l-e- 
quked little adventitious aid to recommend him 
to the ladies; foppery was his avei*sion, nor would 
he have dressed like a beau to gain the heart of 
a princess. He put on a fashionable suit of 
dothes, however, and at half past eleven, set out 
on foot for Wimpole Street. 

He obtained instant admission into tha^ man^ 
sion which contained his first love, and was con^ 
diicted into an elegant parlour, where in a few 
seconds his mistress appeared before him in th^ 



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OB, iiaNDON is 1820. 167 

attractions of perfect beauty ,» adorned with all 
that venders of cosmetics^ jewellers, and millinerSi 
could bestow to make her Ipvely. 
^ , With an air of dignified affability and grace- 
ful condescension, the lady received his compli- 
ments, and appeared in all the confusion of 
feminine modesty, while she apologized for the 
indiscretion she was guilty of in admitting a 
lover to an assignation. " Nothing, .Sir," said 
she, in a voice evidently tremulous from emotion, 
" nothing could have induced me to resort to this 

expediept, but '*. here she blushed, and hid 

her face with her handkerchief, while Edmund 
gaz^d with admiration and fixed attention. 
" The dread of losing you for ever, was, I must 
acknowledge, my sole motive for requesting this 
interview; I was informed by a confidential 
friend of my father's, that he was expected home 
in less than a week — ^but this day's post has hap- 
pily relieved my anxiety, for I received a letter 
from my father this morning, in which he informs 
me, that he cannot return to England in less 
than two months from the date of this welcome 
epistle.'' '' Ten thousand thanks, my dearest 
love,'' exclaimed Edmund, ^^ for this intelli- 
gence. . How propitious is his delay, as it 
will afford me the opportunity . to persuade my. 
adorable^ Lady Frances to make me happy/ ^ 
The lady smiled^ with a glee vfhich she did no. 



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158 THE ENGLISM METROPOtlSj 

attempt to conceal, and rising, went to a bureaa^ 
took oot a paper, and presented it to her lover. 
He read what he thought the letter of a nt)We-» 
man to his only daughter, and respectfully re- 
turned it to his condescending mistress, who 
stood before him in an attitude, which would not 
have disgraced the representative of Juliet. 

£dmnn(i was now irrecoverably a dupe to 
llie artifices of this accomplished woman, who, 
perceiving her influence, resolved to retrieve her 
affairs by matrimony. 

Id the course of the night, she yielded to the 
importunities of her enamoured swain, and 
agreed to elope wilrh him to Gretna, in Scotland, 
in six weeks, or about a fortnight before the 
dreaded return of her noble father from France. 
" I shall then he of age,'* said Edmund, " there- 
fore they cannot dissolve odr marriage under 
pretence of our minority, except, indeed,'* con- 
tinued he with hesitation, looking earnestly on 
the lady. " O ! 1 understand you, Mi*. Vere,'* 
said she, with^ laugh; " make yourself perfectly 
easy on my account ; I have arrived at the age 
of discretion some time ago." ** Are you sure of 
that. Lady Frances?'* *' Why, i donH know,'* 
replied she, apparently musing, ^ I certainly 
have not proved my claim to the character of a 
discreet girl, since my acquaintance with you."' 
*< !Pardon me, nay 16ve," said He, tendeiiy, ^ T did* 



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OR, LOKDON it<r 1890. IfiO 

not mean to offend /' A smile of forg^TOness was 
the best reply. 

Lady Frances, as she chose to style herscK, 
was not indeed in her minority. She was now 
about five-and^-twenty, but by her skill in dress, 
and the artful application of cosmetics, she might 
pass by taper^light for a fine girl of eighteen. 
She had, however, so completely fascinated Ed- 
mund, that the power of the fabled Circe over 
her infatuated votaries was not more complete ; 
and thus, while he imagined himself the envi- 
able favourite of a young lady of quality, he 
was entangled in the snares of one of those 
elegant and accomplished demireps with which 
London abounds. 

About four o^ clock in the morning he retired 
from the residence of his mistress, elated with 
success, and into&icated with the delicious anti-^ 
eipatipn of the felicity and distinction, so fortu- 
nately presented by love to iiis acceptance. 

B]^i:^F MEMOIRS OF AN AUTHOR. 

In the afternoon of the following day, as Edr 
mund passed along the Strand, on his way to 
the apartments of Mr. Brownlow, he met his 
Yorkshire friend, Mr, Buersil, with whom he 
went into a coffiBo-house to have the pleasure 
of a short oonversation* *^ Although we «re now, 
2 



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.160 THE JSNjG^ISH METROPOLIS; 

well acquaii^t^d/* said Bdmcrnid, " and have trar 
veiled and spent many hours together, you have 
^ot yet given me. apy account i)f youn progress 
as a literary adventurer." ""My, story,'" replied 
Buersil, '^ is scarcely worthy of your attentiot), 
for there is npthing very e?(traordinary in it, yet 
a few incidents descriptive of the exertions and 
embarrassments of an author may amuse you. > 
** My name, yovi knpw, is Williapa Buersil. 
I am the eldest son of an opulent manufac- 
turer pf nari:ow. woojlen cloth, who resided at 
Otiey, in Yorkshire. From my evident bias to 
learning, niy father was induced to give me a 
classical education. I was sent at .the age pf 
sixteen from the Grammar School in York to 
****** CoUegie, Cambridge, where I continued 
four years,, during , which I made, a considerable 
progress in my studies. My father intended to 
educate me for the church, but before I acquired 
the preparatory attainments requisite for that 
sacred profession, my hopeful prospect of emi- 
nence and usefulness was suddenly obscured by 
the demise of that worthy parent, who left each of 
his seven children the sum of one thousand 
pounds. With their dividend of the legacy, my 
three brothers pursued the business of cloth ma- 
nufacturers ; but as I was ignorant of that useful 
art, and top proud to assist in a subordinate ca- 
pacity, I continue unemployed till I attained 



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OR, LONDON >N 1820, 161 

the age of twenty*one, when I left College, 
took possession of my property, which was soon 
diminished hy improvidence ; and at the age of 
four-and-twenty, having devoted the best part 
of three years to English composition, I pub- 
lished a volume of poems, which produced me a 
profit of about one hundred guineas, besides the 
repntatron of being a good versifier. 

^' I now considered myself a man of genius, 
indeed, with inexhaustible resources in my own 
mind. My enthusiasm was exalted still higher 
by the passion of love, the object of which was 
Nancy Villiers, a pretty young milliner, who 
kept a small shop in Micklegate, Yoijc. I ad- 
dressed my idol in "^amatory strains ; prevailed, 
and accompanied her triumphantly to the altar. 
For two years our time flew on wings of down, 
but soon after the birth of our first-born son, my 
wife^s business declined, in consequence of her 
determination to suckle her own offspring. This 
o0ended some of her best customers, who up- 
braided her with what they termed a vulgar 
prejudice, but Nancy continued inexorable; 
her boy repaid her cares, and grew one of the 
loveliest and most thriving children in York;: 
and I was too sincere a lover, and toa sentimea* 
tal a husband, to censure the conduct of a woman 
whose maternal affection I respected. 

*^ My pen, the ready instrament of my will. 



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leS THB ENOUSH MSTttOPQLIS ; 

i^eorded some lively eff^sion^ of the IVIt^ on 
tkk subject; but Apollo himself could nM^^ts 
the obduracy of tax*gatherers and parish tkiter^ 
se&rs. Our landlord, too, felt no sympathy for 
two young persona, whom he considered indolent 
and flighty; pytr at^^ck iu trade was sold by 
auotkm, and with the f esklue of our moneyii 
which amounted to about fifty pounds, we took 
priTet^ lodging, and emyoyed for soma months 
all tho luxury of coonulMal and parental love i* 
our obscurft retirements 

^ In Uiis situation, my wife wa& brought loi 
Wd of another soift, and tbei stat^ of ovr puraow 
which, liJ^e i^sops. bask^et of breads daily k^-^ 
^ame tighter, alan»ed mc^ and stinuilated. mjfi 
inveatiAa. I prodofed 2k nQ¥el, mhwh I Imidmlt 
tpt a friendify critic fw pecwal. HA». ene^miim 
W.as e&travagaat, bui he did m>% sto^ with mem 
approbatioa. Ha soett f(iMiiid % pmoelmser for vij^ 
ufterehandiM^ a YoriLshiremaiu ^th. wJkom hi^ 
was intim^itely aeqiiaifttddv and- wJmi is ^B. opiH 
kali puUisk^r iu London. This bookMHiog* 
galmiL ofieoedi mo tdbirfty guineas for* n^. mawn 
antipft^ vDhochJ gladiQfi aMepteds IS0.then.gvm 
ipe an order fiin tw^ioolttmea moioc^ o£ e^nali 
qmntity ,: ai tfrnssaqid pri^eu TUs. seoond noHAh 
i ttaosmittedt tol htm. nbm^ tunrlro. mmrthii^piiv. 
He then propottdc to^ me tfadL L shouU eomai t% 
lioodoiii : and) «i|p0initendl m {mtaodw(l ivorik^ 



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Oll^ I^ONBOK IN 18&0« 168 

and during my jouitiey to town, I first had tb^ 
^flrf)pines6 to become acquainted with you. 
When yOu honiHired me with a Visit i^n ifly 
humble lodging, you had an opportunity of see^ 
itkg my wife and children." " Yes, and of ad^- 
miring them too,'' said £dmund, tufiling aside, 
and taking Bank of England notes to the value 
of twenty pounds out of his pocket-book, '' and 
I request you to pi:esent this gift t6 yotir wifb, 
from a firiend of maternal tod conjugal yirtue/' 
With these words^ he hastily put the tWBey into 
the hands of Mr. BoersiU atid taking advantage 
of his surprise, left the CoffBe^house bdbre bs 
had time to express his thanks* 

Mr. Vere then went to the chambers of his 
friend Mr. Brownlow, and found him busy 
among his papers. ** t have prepared a few 
more observations on Society and Manners in 
L^don," said the satirist^ f< find aukUsed myself 
With digesting them in ihe fandiful form o€ an 
.elementary treatise on the universal seieAK^e of 
satire* They might be pubiiisAied With th» lal^ 
most safbty to the boOkscdle^ notwithstanding 
the existenoe of th6 Blaspbeb^us and S^ditioiis 
Libel Bil^ whi^b^has Mdently becdme %.la#. 
lodeedi th0 imjptoua attdilcity of oertaiA mpudeijit 
lOid up^tioi]^ scribblers required ^eprassion; 
and however We ttay jregr^ any restrainf oh the 
liberty of tbe press, #4 oanBet coiiMieiitioiiitfy 

1-2 



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164 TUB ENGLISH METROFOLIS; 

UUtme the authors of those restrictive measures, 
which the profaneness and infidelity of a few 
obscure, but mischievous and needy adventurers 
provoked, by reiterated attacks on whatever we 
hold sacred. My production is comparatively 
innocent, though several of the observations are 
rather severe on certain public characters, who 
Jhave obtained temporary celebrity." " I have no 
doubt but I shall be much amused, if not in- 
structed by your production, Sir," said Edmund, 
^^ and shall avail myself of the present opportu- 
nity, to request that you will read it to me.*' 
Brownlow assented, and arraqging his manu- 
script, read as follows : 

SATIRE MADE EASY; OR, INSTRUCTIONS IN 
THE AR|T OP POLITE CENSURE. 

Among the useful and ornamental arts which 
contribute to the gratification of mankind, the 
art of satire, as it is the most general, is also 
most popular. Indeed, so universal is the pro- 
pensity to^ this delightful recreation, that it can 
scarcely be termed an art^ biit seems in a great 
•degree to be the instinctive or natural bias of an 
active and ingenious mind', capable of perceiving, 
and proipapt to ridicule: the errors of others, while 
it kindly overloc^ its own. But however strong 
the aptitadejof die youthful tyro, engaged in tiie 



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Ott, LONDON IN 1820. 1Q& 

acquisition of this fashionable aecomplishment, 
may be, much scientific information respecting 
the principles and practice of refined scandal is 
obtainable from satirical 'books, attd still more 
from polite conversation. 

The antiquity of satire is unquestionable, inso- 
much that it claims priority of all the other 
sciences. If we examine the pages of ancient 
history, we shall find that air the celebrated phi- 
losophers, poets, and orators of Greece and 
Rome were arrant libellers. What were the 
animadversions of Socrates, Diogenes, Seneca, 
and other sages, against existing vices and follies, 
but the censure of indignant truth ? ' And the 
more just the application of blame to the delin- 
quent, the more fatal to him the satire, for ac- 
cording to the axiom of one of our English lu- 
minaries of jurisprudence, ^' the greater the truth, 
the greater the libel." 

Since the modern and accelerated dilffusion of 
knowledge in all its branches by the instrumen- 
tality of a free press, no art seems to be promuU 
gated with such ardour and success as the 
science of satire. From the nature of things, 
it must ever be popular, as it is at once so grate- 
ful to our vanity, and may be so easily pursued. 
By its aid we are enabled to depreciate an enemy, 
and even sometimes to aim a shaft of censure at 
the bosom of a friend. Our ancestors were not^ 



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106 THB I^NaUSH METAOJBOOS ; 

it appears, complete adepts in this exoellcDt art, 
biit simply preferred benevolence and neigh- 
bourly fijinpalhy, to that exquisite zeat for cen- 
sure, which in the present enlightened era, cor^ 
stitutes one of the most delicious gratifications 
•obtaioabla at a fashionable f&te. 

Ancient bards, particularly the comic po^, 
for a long time usut^ed the empire of sat'u'e, and 
nobody was allowed to have a rightful claim to 
the honourable appellation of satirist, who could 
not censnre, or defame another in sonorous verse. 
But modern authorg have broken the tramooM^ls 
of metrical composition, and admitted the term sa- 
tire to he equally signiiicant of censorious produe*- 
tidnt whether in pifose or verse. Theexhitaraling 
Mid cerdial inflndnce of tea, es&entially promoted 
thia {ascinati»g art; and ike efequenee olbeat»- 
tifiil yoong^ ladiea and their attendant beaux on 
the proper subjects .of scandal, suggested the 
propriety of * exalting prosaic, and especially col- 
loquial disquisitions on ckaracters and manners, 
to the rank of genuine satire. 

Sa«»e. of the most popular productions of ma- 
€^m )ite«»atiire are strongly satirical, partionlariy 
peieioioc^l a^ political tracts,^ novels, pbenaa, and 
e^en k^gimpfty. Descriptions of modern man- 
iiera and diaraelerislice, are mostly oensorioHs, 
and some W them^ lodiorou^ly satirical. The 
ohargea oi devtoin judgea to juries, are remark- 



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OR^ LOT^DON IN 1830. 167 

^ble for the caustky if a^ misanthropic spirit of 
their satire, especiaUywken anknated by ardent 
hostility again^ sdeb literary offedders as have 
the temerity and preraoaption to censure slatesmen 
invested i^itb power. 

Satire being thus held in such geiieral isml 
deserved estimation by f>^rsons of all ranks M 
civilized society, aiid sa profitable, if not honoar-' 
able to the ingenious pi^Mtitioner, the s^udy of 
thiti elegant art may niyw be considerei as ihdis^' 
peteable to the eoinplete accdmplisJMnettt of a 
yoiing lady, or gentletnanf^ as the artsf ofdfmding^ 
stugvng, playivig apM the pi«m)4i6rte, or converse 
img in broken Frehch. Hen^ee the author of this- 
elementary work a^ieipates siiceiesB, and conr-^ 
siders himself ki some degree- a public benefafetorr, 
by eommiimcsrting the precepts and «xai»pli^. 
\i^hich' he coHected, while engaged in the st»dy 
smd practice of satire during several yraris. 

Censure is considered by mme sennpolmMF. 
moraliirts, ^ the ofilipfirig of vainity and malice^ 
ba« iMoogb w& are ait willmg to satirize^ tka, 
actions of others, we sbooM be olfendied) witdv <be^ 
cbMge of being vnin or maiiidoQ^ From tiiei 
gossif^ag disposition to^ d^famspfiiifm^^ spruivg .<^*f 
titv^or tite public exposure of vice amd^ folly ia^ar. 
hfgh 9teti6n« By degrees, powder pi^emnied 0v^ 
trtitb; s»tii*a wast coadisttiiied asr itt>ellot«!^,. and' 
tlk^ s«tiKi9fc pttdisbed m> atf i»vididup« yilifierl 



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168 THE ENGUSH MBTROFOLIS ; 

It may appear paradoxical to the honest and 
unsophistioated admirer of genuine satire, when 
he 15 informed that a simple statement of facts is 
considered the most dangerous, if not atrocious 
kind of libel. For instance, if a young lady has 
been guilty of a slip in her moments' of levity, 
the censor who should expose her folly, even 
if he had ocular demonstration of the fact, 
would probably be condemned to imprisonment, 
by the verdict of a dozen of his peers! He 
must, therefore, by a kind of literary, or collo- 
quial circumlocution, beat about the thicket with 
due caution, if he hopes to start his game with 
impunity, otherwise he will incur the penalty 
inflicted. on a poacher. If ^the subject of satiric 
investigation be a notorious knave, a pettifogger 
for instance, who incites litigation in the neigh- 
bourhood where he resides, there must not be 
the slightest insinuation thrown out, that the 
gentleman is dishonest, malignant, or mischiev- 
ous. No, the censor must by rhetorical iogenuity 
praise hhn for his activity in enforcing just claims, 
and pr6tecting the property of his clients. His : 
disinterestedness may be commended, by stat-> 
ing the moderate remuneration required for his 
patriotic exertions, to set his neighbours together "■ 
by )he ears; tfnd even the occasional severity 
exercised by this active limb of the law, when he i 
arrests his dupe for the amount of his bill| must 



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OR, LONDON IN 1820. 169 . 

be mentioned as an additional proof of bis love 
of equity. 

From these bints, it must be evident to male 
^udents in the science of censure, that the art 
of libel, like the study of chymistryi however 
delightful in theory, is dangerous in practice. 
While the chymist is engaged in the combination 
of some of the most heterogeneous productions in 
nature, and proudly anticipates that success 
which shall place him at the head of experimen- 
tal philosophers, a sudden detonation in a mo- 
ment destroys his hopes, scatters the fabric of 
hi9 fame in a thousand fragments, and he may 
think himself fortunate if he escapes with bis 
eyes. The witty censor, in the same manner, 
while be chuckles beyond measure at his glow- 
ing exhibition of the peculiarities of some odious 
public character, is not aware of the mine just 
ready to ei^plode beneath his feet; but inflated 
with bis imaginary triumph over exalted vice, 
hastens to amuse the public, and glories in the 
appellation of Cato Minor, or Juvenal Junior, 
while a detachment of police officers is actually 
beating up his quarters, and all the terrors of the 
law environ his appalled mind with the irresistn 
ible impetuosity of an engulphing torrent. 

One class of censors has hithnto been screened 
by the conrtesy of custom from legal punishment. 
The ladies, ever distinguishable for their viva^ 



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.170 TH£ ENGLISH METROPOOS; 

eiou8 superiority in the exercise of the tongue, 
have, with a few exceptions, been graciously 
overlooked by those sapient dispensers of justice, 
whose apparent gravity is generally either a 
cloak for tlieir dissimulation, or the mask of their 
dulness, Yetp even the magic circle of female 
charnas has recently been broken through by 
certain lawyers, whose jealouMy respecting libel,, 
excites a general suspicion in the public mind,, 
that tbey dread the exposure of their own 
£%ults. That flippant and meretriciom satirist^ 
the dearest dear, Mary Ann, who esposed to 
popular ridicule certain, silly amatorry effinions, 
hm since, for her attack iqiK>n the chttractef 
of an honeorable man, been condenomed toi^ 
dopaoca vile. From tl>e frequency of ber dar«^ 
kig^ attacka opeii' the vices of '^read mea^ this 
VMi^Qton libetter will prohadbly be txaited to a 
pre-eminence ever elber fenMile safirbts,. which 
rxmj deter them from their favoairite pmrsmkf 
batf for their comfort, I shaU dmclfose a n^ore' 
safe aftd ^fectual methoil for the expomive 
of their enemies, while they moj pemaan 
equatty secured fijomi responsibiirty awib pimiiriii- 
me»U 

London xboundk witjbt boU speculators, aud- 
amoR^ ethevs^ thene are certain ventuvenypuib- 
lishers, wIm will risk their peniooa^^ wifely for 
the^ sake^ of gain^ No^ as sdme o£ ewr vmtA 



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OR, LONDON IN 1820. 171 

eloquent females, who feel a praiseworthy ambi- 
lion to shine as satirists, are not only of hig4i 
birth but ample fortune, let them imitate a eer«- 
tain rhyming* peep> who has long^ been infeoted 
with a cfN^ethes serijbendif or itcb» which evea 
the ointment of the Edioburgh Reviewers can* 
not cure, and present their rhapsodical soorriKty 
to a bold pnblivsher. 'Thus their censoricHis pro* 
diictioHs wilb soon bechrculated by every possible 
means, and be over«prafsed by hirelings reviewers 
in the newspapers, and beM up a» nsodob of ele* 
gent satire, and fine composition. Poor Mary 
Ann, bowef or, could not avail herself o# this 
cheap pafsport to notoriety, and literary feme: 
she was necessitous, i^nd obK^d iosiil her libl^ls--^ 
hence her disgrace. Had she^ like the iM>bie Peer 
above mentioned, j^iV^ie Anroj^ the efiUsions of her 
spleen, and tike him thus candidly admitted that 
slie properly estimated the value of her works 
when she thought them worth nothing^ the ArgM 
eyes of Jurisprudence vvHJuld have discovered 
guilt only in her mercenary publisher. But as 
this bold female has long been in the habit of mitr- 
ing the best market of her perfections, she could 
not practise the self-denial of bestowing her HbeJ 
upon some meritorious vender of printed paper. 
The consequences have been, trial, cendemna-^ 
tion, and imprisonment, fbr her injudioious een* 
sura of an estimable individual. ^, 



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172 THE ENGLISH METROPOLIS; 

We shall now proceed to the preceptive part 
of this elementary work, and occasionally illus* 
trate the rules by apposite examples. 

In satirical conversation, as well as composi* 
tion, the dignity of the subject is a great requi- 
site, for nobody will be attentive to animad- 
versions on the herd of mankind. Besides, the 
investigation, of an exalted character elevates the 
mind, and stimulates the censorious energy of the 
satirist. But as there is more glory, there is also 
more peril attached to the dissection of eminent 
men; the satirist must therefore avail himself of 
the aid of inuendoes, and other indirect methods 
of exposing the folly or vice of his subject. For 

this purpose a dash may be adopted instead 

of the real name ; nay, on some very delicate or 
hazardous occasions, a mere blank significant of 
the worthlessness of the individual satirized, may 
appear where the distinctive appellation, of a 
great man, or a splendid demirep, should have 
shone. Thejngenuity of the reader will conse- 
c|uently be exercised in the discovery of the per- 
sonage, by an intense investigation of the illus- 
trative characteristics. ^ 
. Another mode of exposing the follies of the 
great, is by the use of asterisks; but although 
those, astral marks are peculiarly appropriate 
in the illustration of characters connected with 
every gradation of knighthood, from Knights 



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OR, LONDON IN 1820. 173 

of the Post, to those of a higher order, ni^ithout 
the utmost circumspection, they may become as 
dangerous as the detonating balls of the chy- 
mist, and as destructive to the unskilful operator. 

The article the^ and the preposition o/*, are 
sometimes indispensable to the satirist in the de- 
signation of the object of his animadversion; but 
they are ominous signs, especially when antecedent 
to the initials of atitledi^nibject, for they may then 
l)e easily construed into a libel. Indeed the dexte- 
rity and judgment of an attorney of any descrip- 
tion, particularly an Attorney-General, in the de- 
tection of a lurking satire is admirable. One of 
these public accusers can measure a dash tvith ma- 
thematical precision, and expound an enigmati- 
cal libel by the aid of asterisks, or stars, with the 
astrological exactness of that renowned conjuror, 
Francis Moore himself, inhis vox stellarum ! Great 
caution is therefore requisite in the use of these 
significant constellations. 

General satire, is not only the most uniexcep- 
tionable, but the best and most effectual mode of 
exposing the errors of any description of pro- 
fessional men; and the student in satire, if he is 
desirous to censure the higher order of the gen- 
tlemen of the long robe, must, if he would suc- 
ceed, speak in general terms, and tfaen,^' Ae 
wham tht cap fits f* likie he who wins the palm. 



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.174 THE.'KNGUSH M]:TK0:901iIS ; 

J*' nii^^imaY itj'^ Hd ruajr, fof ilTstancfl,aver^ Umt 
,(i)e mystertoud inObepce of sympathy wa8 never 
m^e cOcif^cuoiM) tban.ii;) tbe public daportmeilt 
of the Judicial and leg^tMilroiuaries wbofaheis 
aboi]it^tp.<^hQracteriKe« :In a cerUid aiiisec^ibly, 
tbey can sit ^s quietly as grimalkiti, Enveloped in 
ftftf, and riiminaiiog oi) future ttiiscUii^f; they <{an 
even listen with the tpost^ philosophical equa^iti*- 
mity to a debate on th^ interests of mighty stitea, 
tlie revolutions of natioifi$b sujid the. immense pubi- 
]io expenditure of their own country. But let a 
single hint be suggested (^r the amelioration of 
the criminal^ or civil code; tbey start /up^ and 
with irresistible eloquence in a good cause, enter 
their protest against innovation. Their eeal, and 
their cboler too, are excited to the highest pitch 
whenever any question is agitated, tbe tertdeOcy of 
which is directly or indirectly calculated to dimi- 
nisH the^« of office; nay, so sensitively delicate 
are they on this tender sub^ct^ that they are ready 
(o weep when any naeasure is proppsed which diay 
res|jrai^ pettifogging. 

If truth should operate universaUy oa (h» 
minds of men, there wo^ld no longer be any 
cause for. litigation, and the patriotic labours df 
lawyers would becoi^e :mere wpdks of supertr<^ 
g;ation, iastead of the ascendency of tiieir pr^ient 
in^qence in all civilixied wmiimnities. Tratb 



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OB, ^OKDON IK 18t»). 175 

wioold na longer be eofidemned m a Kbe), nor 
sboold webe amused with tlie ex officio espteitu 
of an Attorney General. Our courts of law 
woirici. Me the temple of Janus, be shut ib peace ;* 
tbey would never then resound the eloquence of 
the advocatea of adultery, for there eimld be no 
caaea o<f Crim. Con^ kk a virtuoaa coomanitjr. 
But aince crimen prerai), legal resrtramia are tn-* 
disfWnaabW in every community. In aaopcrl^nt 
nation, the traasfer of property requires more 
knowledge than the contracting parties often 
possess, henee the necessity for the aid of an at'- 
tomey . In this view of tbingsy it must be oJb>^ 
twm to the candid censor, that indiscriminate 
blanve iff eqtfally unjusli and injurions, and obser- 
i^ion will soon convince ii»that those individuals 
are Ihe Ibudest m their invectives against chi« 
canery, who have felt, or deserved to feel, the pe-- 
nalliies ifaflreted by a j«s;t administration^ of the 
liMTS ftgaiiist the fraudulent violator of them*. 
Be»€6 an^ honest lawyer, and there are many 
satoh^ siveaigtbens that social edifice of whidk he' 
iS' at oocf tftt ornament and protector; nay, 
Often viManousTfRrbsofthekwrnay be sn«ces9- 
fill^ eoqitoyed in the deteetion of critnitials^ thns- 
iHaKtmtibg tN* adage^ << sd a thief to caWk a 
ihkf.*^ Saeh h&m^ as pettilbggera, and poitcie^- 
otteers^ whooeeaaioaaUy asBooiatewitksw^dlbnr 



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176 THE ENGLISH METROPOLIS; 

whom they betray for emolumeDty may be com- 
pared to one species of vermin destroying another, 
and thus removing a nuisance. 

In describing notorious characters/ the young 
satirist must not only be circumspect while dwel- 
ling on the pecnliarities of the individual^ but 
even sparing in the use of asterisks. They are 
the galaxy of an Attorney General, and by 
throwing light on the subject may turn a mere 
scintillation of the imagination into a most false 
and malicious libel. Indeed, such is the opulence 
and luxury of the English nation, that in sketch- 
ing the foibles or vices of one extravagant per- 
sonage, the satirist may be said to be -describing 
a thousand. For instance, the fashionable rage 
for driving, notwithstanding the dissolution of 
the ridiculous Whip-Club, may be censured 
with propriety in the disastrous exhibition of 
one of their successors, Sir John Hairbrain, Bart. 
Not long^sincfs. Sir John drove his sociable, four; 
in hand, through Bond-street, in th^ afternoon, 
when that thoroughfare of vanity was thronged by 
the gay, the fashionable, and the prond 8<ms and. 
daughters of opulence. His servant sat at Sir 
John^s Ipft hand, with his arms folded, eqjpying a 
comfortable day-dream; while La^y Hairbrain i 
appeared in the vehicle with a majestic air df so-, 
periority. One of the handmaids of Fomon^fresb 



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OR, 3LONBOK IN 1820. ITf 

from sweet St. Giles's with her wheelbarrow 
l^dea with the produce of the English orchard^^ 
and the foreign orangery, suddenly. crossed the 
street; the horses took fright at he/* discordant' 
screams, and set off at full speed over the poor 
woman, ran against a scavenger's cart^ and pitch- 
ed the beautiful and accomplished Lady Hair- 
brain into the accumulated filth of several streets; 
while Sir John himself fell oi^ the pavement, 
and broke both a leg and an arm ; and the agree- 
able dream of his unfortunate servant was inter- 
rupted by a fall into the street. It is to be hoped/ 
that such a deplorable accident, which had near- 
ly been the death of a whole faniily, will make 
gentlemen who' are ambitious to shine as dex- 
terous charioteers, somewhat more circumspect 
in the display of talents which may cost them ^ 
their lives. A few days practice on Wimbledon 
Common, or in Hyde Park, would be an excel- 
lent preparative; as a fall on the turf would be 
unattended with any danger, except, perhaps, a 
trifling dislocation of the neck, or the rupture of 
a blood vessel; while, on the other hand, the los.^ 
of the equilibrium in the streets of London, 
might be attended with sieveral concomitant and 
incidental dangers; such as being dashed to 
pieces on the pavement, or trampled on while 
down,<by the horses of some hackney coachman* 

M 



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179 THB ENOUSH METROPOLIS; 

The stadent in satire, by observations on real 
lifev will soon perceiTC the general prevalence of 
Mse pretences to merit, which are supported in 
London by varioos modes of imposition on popur 
lar credality. In this great capital, where every 
art seems to have nearly reached the zenith of 
excellence, the art of Puffing has been more ge- 
nerally and successfully practised than any other. 
The art of commendation is always employed as 
the harbinger, and often as the handmaid, of all 
the (me and polite arts which embellish society. 
Yety however convenient or pteasiiig its blandish- 
ments may prove; like other flatterers, its decep- 
tive praises prevent the exertion of those latent 
<]piaKties in the individual, which if properly de- 
v^lbped, might have realized that merit with 
whrfch it endieavom*sr to decorate vanity and indo- 
letrce. The deception of pufimg is often frau- 
dbtent, and sometimes dangerous. Like the 
shameleaH qtiack who presents his high priced 
rnid^ ineffieacious pc^oa- to the lips of infirmity, 
trnder \he imposing natne of corcHal battel of 
Oitead> or vegetabli^ syrup, fafise praise deludes 
ite d^ipe into fatal security, and certain error, 
l^his general deceiver of the pufofic, eventually 
deludes even^ the impostbr, who avaift himself of 
^ the: felse praise chrculatisd^ by the medium of H 
v^ttsd'press'; yet the player, the artist; knd even 



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the aithor, ar& iM a^t C& indulge tfa6 iSeeufHy df 
kid^bAce, «in<i «nlru6t tWvf r^puttttiou to tftii 
fot«e di^nser oftecei^tlty fMfie. 

Tbat irff^rioi- p^t^fetlifie^ dti thd pAMi«'sta^i 
listabers in tli!6 ian>t of |gf«riivtin|;'^ amd' poetttHterg and 
eomypilers, ghovld aii<«ft tbe0»6lv«^ of tfte aiidof 
fitrffing! isnaltar&I, for ^«ir preteitekmsv HketRtt 
cbarnis of d pttin««d hdy^ daily ihe^/uiiifb CMttidlitf 
stid ; but ^b«a< v^« st^ef- p«irs>dfli> tff gmK^ dmt #W)i 
Bcnc6 stoop! to sadiiow^ and iit ilway ef^eA' be sttid 

tli« evil strikt^ at the yoot>6f lirtrii^ itjitpt«i&»(l«i]M>nll 
The biMToMfe^ie^ of dfcMitrtf-ildLsMi^, A% (idp^ftf 
of « dtflHttv, and the ^viltai^m c^' an litiiiettMlu 
eer,- m a i«tfd«r*6f'I(»ttet*yMHdltiHli/ ifkMjrtigj^^ 
th^decepfeknus aid of «>p(l#$ bat «ei&t«c«ttif# iM^ 
iive gettiKM' oU^ aev^ td' dmmidt fi«tt#th^ 
retif deviAi^n^, t»^ detidi^M' iHxetHH^e^ wilh <itt 
naiabotv baes <^ evaiM«Mtt« g^y** <Aid piu(<dii^6tt 
«bk» j^raiM. 

Yet it may be pcopet'hireio iAf$>rih' lilM'^odM^ 
•iodent fif satirical) c<Mipo!Ati«Mf, ttM« iMM, if lAM 
AH* tb« |»ii«Mnsi<»h9r elf our iia«oesttftil"v«^s?(KM^ 
«Md^ «Mta^ «l> MiP pF<»)3i Writers €o»^ dl«j;k!riMI «)^ 
the reiterated ^tiffil by ^4li«ib'tH«i^ ftabHi^iMidMtf 
tatwbw^i QfllleMdi«oJ4M('tl^dV' 
)l<nM^ Masv btmi >^ ptitotAptA' aimi^li*& to 
Sito^a* < piKtitali 'ptrodiibtionkr ii4u» wttfai «> dlM(i' 
timty MidBtBcr aqaalkdv' availedi bimfiriJ^ «>|l IJkV 

M a 



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180 THE ENGUSH MBTROFOUS ; 

daring adventures of border robbers^ and Higb^f 
land assassins ; and by a judicious intermixtare 
of £rse names with old English, occasionally 
gav.e an air of original obscurity to his style and 
ideas, which was mistaken for sublimity. His 
rhymes are frequently dissonant or b^rsh ; many 
of them that are tolerable to a Scottish ear, will 
not bear the test of £nglish pronunciation ; and 
many of the exclamations are at once barbarous, 
ludicrous, and absurd. His principal merit GOQt 
si^lls in animated sketches of rural scenery ; nor 
is he deficient in the art of occasionally grati^- 
ing his reader, by a description of an ajBE^tiog 
incident. He owes much of his popularity to 
the revival of those ideas of adventurous heroism, . 
which prevailed in the days of chivalry; even- 
the terms connected with ancient fortification^ 
the Tower — the Dungeon-keep — the Hall — - 
and all the accompaniments of the feudal ages, 
are brought into play ; and the author artfully, 
and successfully, introduces scenes of courtly 
pomp, and amorous as well as chivalrous gal- 
lantry into his pieces. Thus he keeps up that 
pleasing^ illusion of the fancy, in which consists 
the excellence of descriptive poetry. 

Such are the principal merits and demerits, 
of the most popular poet of the day; but whoever 
shall look for amoraf in his voluminous bfiUads,. 
will be disappointed. Bf orality seems to be a very: 



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OR, LONDON IN 3820. 181 



\ 



seeondary consideration indeed, with this poet; 
nor are his admirers at all fastidious. 

That any author, however popular, should have 
the temerity to extend a ballad over two or three 
hundred pages quarto, was a new and bold expe- 
riment; it succeeded to admiration; and afford- 
ed another proof, how easily the pretensions of 
any literary adventurer are admitted by the ge-» 
nerality of modern readers. But seriously, when 
such excellent ballads as Barbara Allen^ Johnny 
Armntrong^s last good Nighty and The Unhappy 
HuMing of Chevy Chacej are purchaseable for a 
penny apiece, the exorbitant price of two gxxw 
neas each, for the wire-drawn legendary Ballads 
of any modem imitator, of the obsolete effusions 
of ancient and nameless bards, seems uncon- 
scionably extortionate on the part of the pub- 
lisher. 

^ In a commercial country, «very individual 
has a right to make the most of his merchan- 
dise; hence Scott is perhaps justifiable in dis* 
posing of his stock of original ideas to the best 
bidder; and even in improving with interest what 
he borrows from others. He undoubtedly owes 
his success more to the skilful adaptation q( his 
subjects, 'and his poetry, to the puerile taste of 
most modem readers of verse, than to any pecu« 
liar excelleiice in Uie productions themselves* 



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168 THE BfirOLiSH USTBOFOUS; 

While tbey obiain temporary celebrity5 like 
the last farce, or pantomime; the author is re* 
wariledy and stimulated by the hope of future 
gain, manufactures another ^ and another piece of 
equal merit in successioo, to tickle the ears of kbe 
song-singing amateurs of pretty poetry. The 
pleasing descriptions, and simple narratives of 
Scott, bring to the recoUectioQ of those fiairoM 
of* i^ius the songs of the nutsery ; %nd by fi 
vpmk deleetable asiQcUtion mS idea«, revive fth^ 
ipnocent pleasure of infancy* Their taste is Uke 
diemselves yet in its minwity ; )ience those over* 
gmwn children are delighted while the Scettisk 
i^ymster chaunts the lullaby of reason ! T^ 
the poet is firajsed^ the poblisker enriebed, and 
the feeder gratified. lodcsed such is the happy 
igMrattce, (he h^bitaal indekece, eod the grater 
ful self-complacency of the majority of readeiH 
af eiodere poetry, that <8eott, as a mmufactNrer, 
and flEUMi of kusweas, kae prudently ainttsd iiiHi^ 
srif of tket &teility pf success, which the ptublk 
efturdt to poetioal ind^tey. Tkismiodest |>apd, 
in tfae eeeduaiM qf ^ vi^ lotd of 4he Isles,'' 
«en«k forth his ^ hmmble iny,^' as he (eriM it, 
iritheut pabot^age. , He had, k apfMBis, loteod. 
ed to dediealek to a hidy of 4|qa)ity, «irhom he |Nie 
% a f troke of hb pea teaMfereied into an ai^. 



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Oft, LONDON IN 182a. IH$ 

tft might be imagined, since the power of eanoni* 
xaiipB, mty even of deification, has ever been 
considered one of the endowments of those di|« 
pensers of imoiortality who can make syllables 
harmonize. A preseatinVBnt of thit perishablli 
nature of his eulo^um, seen)s indeed to hav0 
erossed the imagiaatiott of this bard* Who ex^ 
claims most querulously, 

" What Vails the wortd ^ould know. 



That one poor garland^ twined to deck thy hair, 

Is hung; upon thy hearse, to droop and withet thefie!* 

] This aFo^al of his own consciousness of the 
frail, and precarious tenure, on Which he holds bi/i 
poetical reputation, would disarm the most vifti. 
dictife Critic, <Ud not th^ conlinaal assMiptioM 
of vain egotism offend the retetdef in liis (otmut 
dittissw But whatev^ preletiaioiis Soott vMf 
hmve 10 diflMence, his^ pttb4i^eri are teriaiAtf 
jf^crf with suffiei«mt conAdfin^ie, ^ ftle^ #6iM 
wst reqmre twn pietes of goMr fSc a* ImMm)i^ li 
thasttge ^X paper mimity, amd srti « chii# whe# thtt 
hank restmtienst rispMtMig tiM ^Mte of spH^ 
are continued by an act of the legfelatwa r m 
spMndlitoni iaiei^ awmiilmig tbiiir f«MiaV)ei- ttese 
ioeadaMr oC Yii^fne^ ffairtmMi$ aotty iMnk (h^^ 
sriyes right; hot oMff thr miMi» bat^idiMli Mli^ 
fftiwiT«f flbol^Ms*ieaiiiialii^4loug}^pilk>^ 



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184 THE ENOUSH MKTROJPOLIS ; 

a|>p6aranc6 of the Octavo edition of each of hifi 
new soDgSy and thus obtain a comparatively 
cheap pennyworth of faftbionable vaudevil. — 
The romantic ballads of Scott undoubtedly 
deserve ,a place on the same shelf with Lang* 
home's <^ Owen of Carroa/^ and ** the four and 
twenty Songs of Robin Hood ;" and when, like 
those popular pieces, they shall be reduced to the 
moderate price of sixpence apiece^ they may pos* 
sibly outlive their author ! 

Next to the industrious Scott, may be mentioned 
the romantic Lord Byron. It would be difficult to 
point out the proper station of this noble candh- 
date for poetic fame, among the iuneful tribe. 
He holds much the siune place ^mong modem 
poets, that a performer on the bassoon does in a 

^ band. Always noisy, sometimes discordant, 
and frequently- misanthropic ; bis extravagant 
sentiments, expressed in a turgid style, are 
scarcely reducible to the standard of critical in* 
vestigation. Amid the gloom, and it may even 
be said, the Stygian horrors of his misanthropy, 
occasional scintillations of genius flash on the 
observant eye. 

This ** rhyming*' peer, like other gentlemen- 
authors, has, it ap))ears, bestowed the effusions of 
bis muse upon a private individual^ and a pub- 

' lisher, both of whom have defended his lordihip 
irom the invidious report, that Im received any 



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OR, I^NBON IN 1820. 185 

Tetnuneration for his works. << I lake upon me/' 
says Mr. Dallas, <' to affirm that Lord Byron 
never received a shilling for any of his M'orks. 
To my certain knowledge, the profits of the 
Satire were left entirely to the publisher of it: 
The gift of the copyright of Childe Harold^ $ 
Pitjfrinutff€f I have already publicly acknow- 
ledged; and I now add my acknowledgment 
for that of T/te Corspir, ' With respect to his 
other poems, The Oiaour and TAc Bride of Ahy^ 
daSf Mr. Murray, thepublisher of them, can truly 
attest that no part of the sale of those have ever 
touched his Lordstiip's hands, or been disposed of 
for his use, and he has constantly, both by word 
and actionf shown his aversion to receiving mo- 
ney for his productions." This rare instance of 
a proper estimation of the value of modem poetry 
is worthy of the imitation of most other noble and 
ignoble versifiers. The whimsical Lord Byron, 
by his gratuitous labpurs in ,the republic of 
4etter8, has given us a proof of his disinterested- 
ness, and his vanity. 

By a ^natural climax in satiric investigation, 
we now come to the laureat himself ; and with 
all his verbosity, and affectation of singularity^ 
perhaps Robert Southey is our best living poet. 
His great error seems to be an inefiectual and 
perpetual imitation of the style of Milton, a poet 
to whom he is in all reapecta inferior. His 



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IM THB KKOUSH MCTmOPOU^ ; 

BBderie the hot of the Goths is, m he prop^ly 
ternif it, a tragic poem, containing man; beau- 
ttitiil'descrii>tioHS of natare, and sotne affeoting 
ittDiclents described in poetical^ tbough aome- 
titnes liKHnbaitic language. It is, however, 
nich superior to any of his former attempts at 
epic po^ry ; and is, properly speaking, m Ro* 
■MIIC9 in blank verse, although founded on some 
VMiote incidents of Spanish history. To the 
hlmk verse of Southey, howevm* pleasing some 
fj^imcks or short passages may be, the general 
eensiire of Dr. Joha«)on seems particularly appli-> 
Mble. ** Tliose who think they can aftanish 
way write bhnk verse, but those who hope to 
pimsf, m^ «oiideaG0od to rhyme/^ 

WiUiam Wordsworth, eja^tber candidrnte for 
fNM» hm imblif bed a foeuk in faltuik verse, in 
M« istg# Aod Sfidid vehiBie quaito. As a de^ 
VMipitire pMm» Awveying aatoFaUaad sometiswa 
WautMal pictiMes of vursi iiceoery^ and intet^ 
fpetsed with many jiicbcinus nrfcistifM sns hm* 
man life, the production of Mr. WoidbwMtb hM 
QUMril^ bii^moslfiisaskm witthttdisfosai t«y«arn, 
before they e«me to rihe eoiMloeioA mt a descrip- 
4ive fmmn c( thiea mt fmm haadred psfts ^pmrtak 

^ a geaoM^ aad ea^didi nviaw mt i\»mti» 
maosMffadhietiaas «f Be olh e y , ftsattt Woidb^ 
moftk, and l4>td Bfaoa^ it: aaaf diid^ ba i a ssst ^ 
ad^thal tkeit faslsariinsf to 4ha hum^^egiM 



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po^t^^ or pven writers )it>f>v6 yiKE^id^ity^ «re iiBr 
supported jby aoy of their profipctjom. 

Th^( aur literi^tqre has jn s^nad^ instam^^s heeo 
ioj]i)red by that torppri^c mS^emce q( finonyn^Qus 
qriticispi^ l?hich is repre9^ive of th^ len^rgi^d of 
jj)vepile g^Dius^ cannot h^<(|puhtad i whi(e on |ht 
o^fa^ ba^ij, tb^ bapb?fcri«^s of b^d tapt^, ^ thp pif^ 
t^i^ipq^ of vanity, have frfiq*»eRtly h?^q fl«rr^<^4 
by th§ ^^U-tip^ €^nw^i?0s pf thasf^ judvoHw 
«{iti0s^ wib? h^?(e written for the M0o|JpilyjEt«¥iaW4» 
Ybe ^Uor ^a Monthly JVIfigraiae, j^ipptad to 
4^prepiat(^ this wfill-establinhed litersiryjai«roal; 
but his animadverHioa^ on the late pmpriotor of 
<;be Monthly BevieRr, require the castration oi 
tha ioidigoant satkisA. Many literary men enm 
imly affiroit that th^y arewmoh indehte4 te 
tkk ^eYiew for the impeaveineovt q£ iheir taste. 
4t Ibf^ mme imm ik must he aikn^^lodg^Mir 
1|miI Ib^ MootUgr BevieiiMyt like their jooq» 
tmiponiiM^ are lia^ 'to ^errora* arising fraai 
pfigudiefii the.ijnfluence of partieuliar Mlifiani, 
|fpltti?a),.Apd philosophical cq^ona, and ntfaaf ia. 
^ $mitiie4» wkisk ipan ia hia «^ ieaiigl^itfitted fA%tm 
^M km ia.'^ ftit em a ciuidid c^aip^raaoa n^itb 
iftkef IkcMury jomtwiIs, m^ ewq the »iost tla he * 
iat0 farcidbrtiiwris of tiba best fihiglisb, ^a4 ^Veoeli 
^fritkok, tiMi AfotttUy Aeviev «tiHi4*ttje f«aialflkift 
i$§ elaiMa ta popiiilatity>^«iid eeotkmm U^ «hiA 
. iiit mlyib^ ilm general Mio4oar #i 



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188 ^ THB ENGLISH MBTROPOLIS; 

it8 critical strictures, but the manliness* liberality, 
and independence /of those political principles^ so 
boldly and so eloquently illustrated in its pages. 

A rara avis^ like a black swan, entitled the 
Eclectic RevieWf niade its appearance a few years 
ago in the aviary of the Muses. This non*. 
descript journal, may be termed a literary prude, 
who comes forward with pretensions to superior 
purity of principle, judgment in selection, and 
critical acumen. These pretensions have been 
advanced with varied success, for the Eclectic 
Review like " th^ inconstant moon,'* waxed or 
waned, according to the abilities of the editor 
and his coadjutors. In imitation of high life, 
whatever is vulgar, or comnaon, is excluded from 
the pale of this apparently incorruptible censor. 
It leaves the disgusting vices, the ridiculous 
follies, and the absurd fashions of the fleeting 
hour; to the castigation of inferior critics, and 
soaring on the wings of Aristotelian sagacity; and 
Johnsonian precision, rises into the higher at* 
mosphere of literature, where all is pure ; and 
selects such passages, with correspondent garnish* 
ing, as may regale the nice amateurs of Eckctic 
criticism. Hence, the most sensitive and modest< 
mortal, may safely read aloud the contents of this 
decent journal, which is iu> small praise in this 
boasted ag^ of refinement, when virtue, and vice, 
like the odours in sbot-silk, are so ingenioiisly 



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OB, LONDON IN 1820. 19& , 

interwoven by corrupt artisans^ that it is dijffir 
cult to distinguish the one from the other. From 
this description, it must be evident, that the 
'Eclectic Review may be read with profit and 
pleasure, by persons of taste, whose delicacy will 
be protecited from the rude shock of impiety, 
ribaldry, and folly, which annoy the general 
reiider, / 

Indeed, the principal prose' writers of the pre*- 
ser4 day are mere compilers, ampng. whom the 
reviewet*s are most cpn^picUQUS, and retnarkablei 
for the ingenious facility with which they fill the 
pages of monthly and quarterly Imoks of scraps* 
Dr« Aikin, who is perhaps the most entertaining 
compiler in existence, has rather ludicrously 
described the productions of modern prose writers, 
as a species of cabinet-work } but although he is 
himself a nice operator, some of his contempo- 
raries are clumsy workmen. This is particularly* 
the case with Quarterly Reviewers, who cannots 
plead haste as an extenuation of their errors: 
three months are certainly sufiScient for the. ma- 
nufacture of one hundred and fifty pages of in- - 
different prose, in an age when an industrious 
bard, can work up scraps of antiquity into a le-. 
gendary ballad, of double the size, in the same 
time. One quarterly censor, however, the 
Edinburgh RevkrVi is ably co'nducted; the cri- 
tics, like their countryman Scott, dexterously 



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ItIO tut t^i^austt imttiOPdiASi 

MttiBiCt the e^senrce 6f a voltfme, atid after mmg- 
ffttg it wrth the^ir <ywn ^trodg^ and ^i'g'nlfidatit 
MInmeiits, they send it from their manafacfory 
into t&e eotnmerciat world, an ekgdht and at- 
firactii^e artf^le, like a BirnNngbam btil!ton treM^ 
gtH. Indeed!, the whole secret of the art b;^ 
wbi<!h the Ediwburgh Revietvcrs hate obtained 
popularity, is their skilful gratification of th^ 
W<^st |Missridns of the iMhnaii rbind. In retigfon, 
th^ir pkihioptiime ha^ ^IterklHed the ptide df 
iwMet^; in [k)litiGSv therr bold ^en^ure of then hi 
paw^i', Whether just or^ unjttst, gr^ifi&A'iHe pre- 
di«]^«>iiition of iliaQbi>nd H^ depreciate their rtrien$; 
tmA Wi Kteratnre^ by a f««i^ogt^dation of a- c^ntii^^ 
«r tmiii Md talkii^g m^H Uafnedly ab6ut ChaUc^, 
SpeAMfr^ SMtekftfUea^, IWd, Mario w, Cbw^eys 
i>rydeti, and MiMoa< and ilkistrafin^ their conf^ 
tA^HKin hy fery beM^ifol figures and passag^tf; 
mm^ it^lMf some^ bortmved, and soitere (>rt^^>M?^ 
tb^y spared ilieiif readers a* worid of aippKtaiti^nv 
Md) saved' tkem tb«> trMiUe of risingf fri^ their 
sMis^ fo coamlt avthbrd by way of n^ference^ 
thoi%ti^th«y wer^ raided arMnd di^ shelved of 
tbeip libraries. ThuH' by compKnientitig* ^ 
tttittf, ministering' 4o» the iadolence^ and cherif4l- 
teg the ijgDorattM of matikind, v^hom' th^y pttu 
fiMsed to kxfoitn y the Edinburgh Rei^Wers hnv^ 
established tUxew periodical quiin«ciM of (MtkUM^ 
n/iMh la/Al doubtfesn hi6 pmA^i^^ r^^A, «ld 
1 



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Oli, LQNllOI^ fN 1820. Wi 

prized, wbUe v^nrnky asstinEye« the gnrb <^ mtellU 
gence, maligfirity of satire, tod amusing^ extracts 
of criticism. 

Out of the threescore and ten periodical pub- 
lications which illumine the literary heoni^ere 
of Britain, W€^e it peaictieablse^' valsaMie ma- 
terials for a smgle mseelktny j>(vight fft&m time 
to time be selected ; but what human beings 
could have the patience, even to glance at the 
thousands of pages of insignificant and^ l^atf- 
batched ideas, which constitute the principal part 
of these new and interesting publicatioris ? 

The art of printing, which has so long pro- 
moted the interests by faciKtating the d'ecepCions 
of empiricism in all its varieties, 6as also re- 
ceived a »ew impulse from quack news-wtiters, 
and quack mecbanicians. A (rermair proj[ector^ 
eager like the rest o^ his countrymen, to catcR 
part of the golden shower of English munificencei, 
has substantiated his claims to patronage by in^ 
venting a rotatory printing-macliine, for workin^g^ 
off newspapers with a celerity hitherto unknown. 
One or two of the diurnal prints are, it seems, pro- 
duced by, this expeditious medium, and thusi po- 
litical falsehood^ can be multiplied and circu- 
lated with a velocity, which reminds us of the 
. ikmoui structure dedicated to the Goddess <tf 
Lies: 



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102 THE . ENGLISH METROPOLIS J 

** With rapid motioo tura'd the maosion roQod ; 
With ceaseless noise the riDging walls resound. 
There various news I heard of love and strife. 
Of peace and war, health, sickness, death, and life ; 
Of turns of fortune, changes in the state ; 
The falls of fav'rites, projects of the great ; 
Of old mismanagements, taications new ; 
All neither whoUy false, nor Wholly true." 

From these cursory observations on the use of 
the pen and the press, a youthful student in the 
art of satire, may be taught caution in the em- 
ployknent of such powerful auxiliaries ; Jet me 
now request his attention to a subject which has 
for ages been the theme of censure with all pa- 
triotic individuals, who thought they evinced 
their public spirit by abusing the Government of 
th^ country. That subject is a GENERAL 
ELECTION, which though periodical, affords 
striking illustrations of manners among the dif- 
ferent classes of this great community, when an 
opportunity is presented for the undijsguised pro- 
fession of popular opinion. 

,0f the moderation, decency, and manliness of 
the populace of Westminster, unequivocal proofs 
were evinced during the last struggle of parties, 
when a ferocious mob actually pelted Sir Murray 
Maxwell, while that gentleman addressed them 
from the hustings in Covent Garden. Yes, the 



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0m, XiONDON IS 1830. 199 

boasted magQftQimity of Britons was nobly sbewn 
indeed, by driving a gentleman from bis place, 
wounded, and di^gnred with mire^ to make 
way for a demagogue ! The modest and di«n«> 
terested Henry Hunt, Esq. also offered himsdf 
as the representative of Westminster in Parlia^ 
ment, and obtained the votes of two or three 
hundred freemen ! 

I shall now describe ihe ^gcand exhibition of 
electors in a certain county. 

A OENERAl:. EI^SCTION ; OR, JOHN BULL IN 
HIS GLORY. 

That perioduml jubilee of freemen, a General 
Election in t\m happy isle, may justly be con- 
aidered a temporary revival of the gi^lden 9i^e. 
During sixteen days allowed by tbe act for poU^ 
kig, the most uncoiilK^d liberty which a ro- 
nmatic advooate for fr^wiU could desire, oni- 
yensally prevails. Human nature now appears 
in all its pristine dignity, ^roelaimmg with sound 
of trampet, and bout of drum, its disposition 'to 
ittaire a noiae io the woiM. , No mepotn^ry set* 
dier is |m-Qiktad Aoi appear ia the- 4Mniseorated 
dimict.appvopsialttft to (the.worship/of mational 
Libiirfcy, ^here lier i votaries riot at ^wiU ^» 
tfic aaattMba of ilwtehaaringianfeiende. .^PboM 



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f94 THIS ENGLISH M&TROPOlilS ; 

the fiberty of the tongue, and tbe Kberty of the 
press are employed to some purpose^ and the 
characters of the great, the brave, and the fair, 
are vilified without fear or remorse by the par- 
tisans of the difierent candidates for popular 
favour. 

During this grand festival of patriotism, the 
order of society is subverted. Superiors solicit 
the favour of their inferiors, and with flexible 
neck, and extended band, earnestly request the 
honour of the free and independent elector's 
suffrage ; while he, " good easy^ man,** crainmed 
to the throat at an adjacent tavern, generously 
complies with an air of consequence sufficiently 
ludicrous. His female friends are also emulous 
to share with him^ tbe enviable distinction of 
weai*ing the colours of the happy candidate for 
legislative honours. 

On this felicitous occasion, Boniface taps hiii 
best home-brewed ale, which by its invigorating 
energy, fortifies the throat for the sonorous repeti* 
tion of " Church and King !? " The Majesty of 
the People r' '< Freedom of Election without 
Bribery and Corruption !" and similar. exclama- 
tions.expressive of party, or individual sentiment. 
Inspirited by the vivifying influence of Sir John 
Barleycorn^ tbe eye beams, with renovated briU 
iUmcy, aad alternately Airveyaihe banners of the 



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OR,. LONDON IN 1$20. 195 

favourite candidate with a complacent smile, and 
that of his opponent with an indignant glare. 
During an election all the senses of the happy 
voters are gratified, and in this grand entertain- 
ment music is a powerful auxiliary to mirth and 
civic animation. What delightful harmony fills 
the air ! The clangour ^f cymbals, tjie ear-strain- 
ing bounce on the great drum, and the various 
sounds of the clarion, the clarinet, and the bas- 
soon, arouse the animal spirits to a degree of ex- 
tatic elevation. 

In every county-town and borough, the utmost 
activity prevails; every nerve is braced to the 
highest tone of patriotic expectation, and every 
eye brightens on the approach of that happy mo- 
ment when the golden — ^no, tlie bank note- 
shower scattered from the portfolio of the smiling ~ 
candidates for popularity, shall reward the toils 
of electors, and their assistants. As a prepara-> 
tive, the baker, the butcher, the brewer, and the 
distiller, send In their best productions, as incite* 
ments to good fellowship and constitutional fra- 
ternity.: the milliner collects ribbons of the &- 
vourite colours of the candidates, and exhibits 
them in her window in the most attractive point 
of view; while the simpering wives and daugh- 
ters of the electors, await with palpitating hearts^ 
the blissful moment when they shall be honoured 
with a chaste kiss by an expectant legislator! 

K2 



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106 THE ENGLISH METROPOLIS; 

In this great struggle of parties, the original 
object of the election seems to be totally over- 
looked ; this is indeed no tinoie for reiiection — the 
people are happy, — what would you have more ? 
" Where ignorance is bliss, His folly to be wise/* 
Indeed, so ingenious is political sophistry, that 
the friends of ministerial influence, and opposi- 
tion, are equally gratified with their choice ; and 
persuaded by the affecting eloquence of declaim- 
ers, that Mr. Wiseacre is the most proper repre- 
sentative in the world for the ancient borough of 
Fuddlington, that sagacious gentleman is elected 
to the honourable o€Bce of representative of the 
enlightened and patriotic burgesses. 

The enthusiasm of electioneering has a most 
powerful influence on the imagination ; a kind of 
temporary insanity elevates the mind to a degree 
of poetic furor J which is discharged in squibs, 
lampoons, songs, and epigrams without number, 
but not without-price, for in some instances t\x6 
poet is rewarded more liberally than even the 
laureat himself. 

Sometimes the partisans of a candidate for a 
seat in Parliament, are convened a few days 
prior to the commencement of an election. The 
following dialogue is a specimen of the diversity 
of' opinion, which commonly prevails on the 
occasion. 



2 



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OE, LONDON IN 1820. 197 

■A PUBLIC DINNSR IN THE COUNTY OF 

Presenti Parson Plausible, Counsellor Quibble, 
Farmers Blunt, Bluff, Frank, and Sly, Grind- 
well, Miller, Pinch'em, Mealman, 8ic. 

Counsellor Quibble in the chair. 

Quibble. Now, gentlemen, as tbeclotjb is re- 
moved, I shall pnopose, as a toast,, pur poble 
though absent friend. Lord. FuzbalU-^(Z>rpc»# 
with three times thtee.J 

Frank. Why to.be sure his Lordship throw^ 
dust in one's eyes—yet he gives a pretty iong 
lease. 

JKuff. Ye$, but he likes to raise the.^ipdlW 
some occasions, &r, all that. 

Plausible. And is not that justifiable ? jpp^r 
tfider bis Lordship'js large family, and JElttm^ous 
Aervaots« They cannot liv/e on the air. 

Sltf. No, that they can't. Parson, and dOAy 
Lord xv\\l take 6ir&.to have 4he fmiitSiJ^ Pur 
1jJ>ouf for their support. By4be*-hye, J hav^ 
ntkesk .thought, that several y oiing . iell^jiv;^ whft^ 
Jhis Lordship employs for io^toi^n^) and gmontfi, 
migla; make itolerable pl9aghm£n; or.w«re thay 
even employed to delve in^a ditch ior a maxifiitt 



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198 THE ENGLISH METROPOLIS; 

they would be of some use. Now they seem 
like pleasure horses to be kept merely for shew. 

Quibble. Yes, and so they certainly are. You 
koow, gentlemen, that Lady Fu^ball is the 
daughter of a celebrated jjrtist ; she has always 
been accustomed to conteinplate beautiful ob- 
jects, and therefore the most agreeable attend- 
ants are selected to be ;^boiU her per^oo. 

Blunt. Yet she was not so very particular in 
the choice of a husband. 

QuiN>te. O you know a, title is in iteelf suffi- 
ciently ^ attraciife 4;o a lady . 

Plausible. I wish, Mr. Quibble^ you would 
proceed from this small-talk to the biisiness of 
the day. 

Bluff. ^ For my own part, Parson, I think the 
best part of the business is over. We have had 
a good dinner^ which in these times is a very 
good thing. 

Grindweil. You may well say so. I wish 
every honest felbw in the couittry had as good a 
dinner. 

Plausible. That is a Radical wish, let me 
tell you, Mr. Grindwell, and comes most un*- 
graciously from the lips of a miller. Why, man^ 
if the common people were well fed and clothed, 
they vrould lose all resped; for their betters, the 
requiJEote. saboDdiiiation for the . siippprt of a 



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OB, LONDON IN ISSO, * 191> 

^ttper equilibrium in society would be lost, 
and 

8fy. We should be all overset in the mire, I^ 
suppose. 

Ffxmk. You should not interrupt the Parson^ 
Farmer Sly, you are a queerisb sort of fellow, 
but there is some respect due to the cloth. The 
Parson is, you know, a very learned man, and 
his 6aying*s are not easily understood by lis com- 
mon people. ^ 

Bluff'. Who do you call common people? If 
it were not for such folks as we, M^ho would pay 
first-fruits, tythes, and the rent of pews, with 
several other expences too tedious to mention ? 

Quibble. Farmer Bluff, you must not cast any ^ 
invidious reflections on Church and State. 

Bluff'. Perhaps, lawyer, Fm as loyal a man 
as' thee. The Church and State ought to be 
very precious to us all, for Fm sure we pay 
full dearly for their support. They cost us as 
much yearly, as, if judiciously laid out, would 
soon bring all the a>inmon lands into tillage, 
and then we should have bread for 

PincKem. An old song, and what would you 
be the better, Farmer ? Would the cheapness 
of food enable you topay your rent ? 

Plausible. I think you have him there, Mr. 
Pinch^em. 1 entirely agree with you on the 



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200 THB BffGUSH METKOPOUS ; 

propriety of promoting temperance among the 
people. 

Blunt. OH d — ^ your rescriptions, or prescrip- 
tionsy or whatever you Political Quacks oaU 
'em ; you wooU soon diet my countryoien into 
8ubmi$sion^ if they were obliged to adopt your 
regimen. For my own part, I love my eocmtry, 
I wish to see the people happy, and if we mnat 
from time to time have wars, I wish to see Bri* 
tons fed like fighting cocks. 

Bh^. Bravo, bravo! give ooie thy. hand, my 
friend ; while we have plenty of such hearty 
cocks as. thee, we need neither fear foreign not 
dpibestio enemies. 

Quibble* Domestic enemies ! I hope we have 
nothing to fear on thcA score. 

BlunL Yes, but \#e have— and diir most dan- 
gerous enemies are those limbs <of the law, who 
are always for setting. us together by the ears. 

Plausible. Na personal! ttes^ Mr. BluHt, I be* 
seech you. Let us change the subject* 

]^Unt. With all my heart. FU give yoa« 
toast. Here*s :the Roy al Fionily. 

PUmsible. Perpetuity ta them I 

JSlff. You mean, m^y they live for ever. So 
then, you're for nothing reversionary. 
. filuff. How can you say sq. Sly ? Don't you 
know 4hat the pious JXoct^r ^cRfects a Imng in 



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Oi^ 3U»fI>ON IM 1830. ' 201 

Lord KuzbttU^s gift, on the demi^ of ike i]i6iMii«» 
bait, who is now foarscore. 

Bh^. O the secret is out* That accounts fioir 
oiir^ood Rector's zeal in the cause of the fortb^ 
cmtiing candidate. 

JWifiA. What candidate ? 

Plausible. Aeally, gentlenien,i your &eetiouiSh 
ness is so amuMog, that I almont forget the Qb« 
ject of the meeting. 1 need not remind you of 
tbe patriotisni, benevolence, and other sterling* 
qualities of Lord Fusball, particidarly bij| mod&4 
ration in raising the rents- mi his eistates oi^ly: 
twenty per cent, when so many other land> 
owners require at least forty. Nor ha>i his LorA* 
nhip been inattedtive to the encouragement of 
Biamifactures. £ver solicitous to prpmcrfe the 
best interests of his country in general, and those 
of this county in particular, h^ commanded m^ 
to infoi'm you, gentlemen, that his son, the Ha« 
n<mrable Mr. jGiihb, is^nibitaous of the honootiof 
being your repreaentatiiie in Parliament.' 

Bhmt. Why, for my own part, Parson, I bine 
no objection to tbe young gentleman's taking Ahe 
trouble to misrepresent us in the Wittena-^Gre- 
mote, or assembly of wise men. The late House 
of Commons was not so earrupt, or at least not 
so hypocritical as the long Parliament dissolved 
by Ooniwell. Bui I hai^e jMe thing OMM ^o 
remark ; it seenite to tM.a grievaixce, or in cfth^ 



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20^ THE £K4>I.ISH MBVAOFOMS ; 

words^ it hurts my pride as a freeholder; to kiiiwv 
that two or three score of petty residents in a 
rotten boroagh, can send as many representatives 
to Parliament as fifteen or twenty thousand sub** 
stantial yeomen. 1 fiave another subject of coim^ 
plaint too, and that is the defective memories of 
Members of Parliament in general. While they 
canvass for votes, they are sufficiently attentive^ 
our wiv^ and daughters^ nay, the very. hooBe^- 
oaraids are kissed aqd flattered by these conde^ 
•eending gentry; but before they are a .week. 
in town, whether it arises from the thickness of 
the air, or the noise of London, they seem to lose 
all recollection of their promises, and voiv6,o£ 
patriotism. So we may toil and grumble on, tiB 
the next general Section, and then we shall have 
a repetition of the former farce. All their ek>^ 
quence, too, seems exhausted on the hustings; and 
even should Mr.' Glibb be selected as our. spokes* 
man> notwithstanding his apposite name, be. 
would probably be mute in the House, even on a 
subject of the greatest importance to his consti- 
tuents. 

BOROUQH OF Q********. 

Scene-^The Town Hall. 

Present^ Mr. Tangible, Attorney ; Mr. Starve- 
ali, Corndealer; Mr. Sharp, Cutler; Mr, Qos^ 



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OR, LONDON IN 1820. 203 

ling", Tailor ; Mr. Ferment, Brewer; Mr. Pinch, 
Baker ; Mr. Gloss, Mercer j and Mr. Prisket, 
Printer. * 

Tan<(/ible. Well, gentlemen, another auspicious 
opportunity presents itself for the improvement of 
our funds. I always rejoice at the dissolution of 
Parliament. Mr. Speculate, frdm Bedford-Place, 
London, has just made his appearance 'among* us, 
and instead of wasting his time and exhausting 
our patifeiifdfe by a long unmeaning speech from 
the hustings; be W now actively employed in di- 
viding t^h thousand pounds into suitable presents 
for the worthy and independi^nt Burgt^sses of 
G********. I shall only just hiiYt, ihrftihis ho- 
nourable candidate has unlimited 'credit at Hhe 
bank of ***, and when eVery otlielr article is so 
dear, surely ^rmctpfe^ should not be 'sold for an 
old song. 

Starveall. You are facetious, Mr. Tangible; 
but although we must make the most of the old 
Borough, let us for the sake of decency keep up 
appearances, and talk loudly of public spirit. 

Gloss. Aye, Starveall, you are in the right, 
we must always keep the best side out ; in fact, 
there never was a time when patriotism was so 
precious; it is almost as rare as gold; 

Prisket. Never mind gold, neighbours, while 
we can get plenty of paper we shall do Very well. 
"Give me only a few reams of virgin paper, and 



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204 THE JCNGUSH MET&OPOtlS ; 

1*11 engage to confer all the cardinal virtaes cm 
our favourite candidate, by a singly sq^ueeze of 
my free, and impartial press. 

Sharp. No doubt of it, Frisket j you printers 
are devilish keen blades, and can cut up any 
party, according to the price paid for dissection. 

Ferment. AM trades must live; why should 
not printers be paid as well as other tradesfolk^ ? 
You do not consider what risks they run— in 
danger of being prosecuted by Government, if 
they disclose too freely the state of public i^ 
fairs ; and of being thrown into the mashing tii|» 
of popular indignation, if they approve pf th^ 
measprefs of administration. 

fiosUfig. Whyi yes, the mpsjt igi^orao^ feUoiW 
wiH bf pa^ddling, and although as stupid ^s n^ 
goose, h^ will presume tp cen|sur^ \hwe ^amre$ 
as yon call them, by which our rulers, like jqst 
i^nd jpdi^oi^, tr^de^ent are enal^ed to cu^ the 
jqpfit ficcordjipg to thp clot^. If gre^^ p^en wij^ 
p^bbag{|B a little jr¥)w imd ^hen, v^e oughtto^i^najl^ 
some ^llQw*m<?e fqr k^Vf^v^ fwjty. ^f^. ^9^ 
l^g ^ays w^ are al^ np h^(.te|* Jthan w/e should ^e; 
an4 wheipi I yff^tf^tjB^ |4> vifxdic^to )(he public 
jjpirit of iVe Pprgp^w^ of tftis n>ps| ^nf i^pt Cqfr 
poration, she callied it ?t rfiU^hr<^h9 ,9^ 
threatened jbQ throv th? iB9pRp i4 ?ny J»««A ^f 
} 4^ 4iAt /9$y wjr v^tp f9r^%)mi4v4 »AM«4^ 



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ORy LONDON IN 1820. 205 

Tangible. Nay, Gosling, surely yoa are noit 
such a goose as to expect such a sum for allow- 
ing a good-natured gentleman, to take the trou- 
ble of appearing as your proxy in Parliament. 
There is also something due to rank, station^ 
and influence, you know. There's Mr. Signum 
the banker, will expect two hundred pounds ; the 
Reverend Simon Gleanhands an equal sum, and 
I shall consider myself entitled to half as much. 
If you can get fifty pounds for your vote, yoa 
may think you have taken the proper measure of 
the illustrious Mr. Speculate, our worthy repre^ 
sentative — ^when he has paid handsomely for that 
enviable honour. 

Gosling. Well, well, Tm ho scholar ; I mdst 
be content with what I can get. All men, I find, 
are as partial to cabbage as tailors themselves. 

Pinch. Why not. Gosling ? For riay own part, 
r can boast ^f producing as fine light paUtable 
bread as any man in England. 

Ferment. Yes, Pinch, when tvei^ed you will* 
be found Wanting. 

Pinch. Whatever dcfiriency thefre may be in 
my weight, neighbour Fehnfent, there is a still 
greater lack in your manufacture. Your *Ae has 
rieither body, nor Spirit. 

OosUng. ^tiiin it resemble our good ^^d^ 
Borough. 
TiMgihk: Rbld yotirtoiigue^'ydagbos^h^r 



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206 THE JBNGLJUSH MGTKQPOLIS ; 

Borough is highly vetierable, respectable f and ra- 
luable. It is an excellent merchantable commo- 
dity, and reminds me of a couplet of Hudibras: 

The real value of a thing, 

Is just as much as it will bring. 



SATIRICAL STRICTURES ON MODERN EDUCA- 
TION. 

The youth of all the higher and middle classes 
in society have a manifest advantage over those 
in a lower station ; yet it will be found that» in 
consequence of injudicious management, they 
derive little benefit from contingent circum- 
stances. The indulgence of infantine caprice, so 
prevalent in this metropolis, is one great source 
of folly and vice. From a ridiculous affectation^ 
of tenderness, many mothers lay the foundation 
of the future obstinacy of their sons, by gratify rng 
their childish passions. Such falsely good-na- 
tured beings will exclaim, " I cannot bear to 
make my child unhappy, even for a moment ; 
poor fellow ! he will have trouble enough when 
be grows up ; sorrow will come too soon !" This 
absurd idea is very common among parents, who 
imagine their children will be taught the regula- 
tion of their passions by experience. . 
Boys are indulged, lest severe restrictionft' 



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0% LONDON IN 1820. Wf 

should break their spirit, and render them timid; 
hence they become assuming and impudent, and 
on their entrance ' into life are like a luxuriant 
tree, whose superabundance of branches and 
foliage prevents it from producing any good 
fruit, till the sevisre hand of experience lops its 
redundancies. 

Hbw irrational are those parents who perinit 
their sons to attain maturity, with only a few 
fashionable accomplbhments ! Theystepout into 
life with all their passions and desires in full 
vigour; where, impatient of contradiction, and 
unaccustomed to controul, they areoften involved 
in embarrassments and quarrels. £}nchanted by 
the smile of pleasure, the giddy youth revels in 
her illicit enjoyments. Fascinated by public 
amusements, and misled by dissolute com|)a- 
nions, he pursues the phantom of happiness with- 
out reflection. The stews, the gaming-table, and 
the tavern, consume his health and fortune ; till 
ruined, emaciated, and forsaken, the wretch is 
left to pine in hopeless despondency ; or unable 
to meet his naked heart alone^ terminates his 
vain-glorious career by suicide ! Such, alas ! are 
too often the fruits of an improper education. 

Young clergymen would be the most proper 
histfuctors of youth. Being well taught them- 
selves, and coming fhesh from classic ground, 
with their faculties invigorated \yj polite learn- 
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208 THE SNGLISH METROPOLIS; 

10(^9 they are fully competent to the task of in* 
cnlcatin^ knowledge; and, from their prepara-^ 
tory Ktudy^ of etnicsy they ate proper guardians 
of the morals of others. 

Men of genius would find ample room (or their 
active minds to expatiate, in tracing, and aiding, 
the development of the human understanding. 
Mor will any man of sense object to the avoca* 
tion, who will take the trouble to recollect that 
some illustrious writers have presided over youth, 
as manters and assistants in academies. Milton, 
Johnson, and Goldsmith, ^^ poured the fresh m^ 
structum o^er the mind ;*' nor caa we rationaUy 
consider that emjdoyment as a degcadation of 
talents, which qontribqtes sa essentially to the 
diffjanion of knowl(^dge« 

When the pupil has been initiated in the ele* 
ments of useful iscience, and while the susceptible 
heart throbs with generous feelings, the beauty 
of morality should be exhibited in the most en* 
gaging garb. The simple and sublime precqpta 
of Christ, will awaken that benevolence which is 
the source of human fBlicit^ on eaisth. The iutor 
will have an opportunity to contrast .the fanciful 
doctrines of .the heathen, with the. elevated i^ul 
godlike dignity of Christianity,; and the unemng 
precept, " Whatsoever ye would that all man; 
should do unto you, do ye even so, unto t^em,'* 
wiUp by tmaluiig vim ^fiVl^.ai^ iperiMiiaat 40^ 



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OR, LONDON IN 1820. 209 

pression^ guide the happy being in the path of 
justice. 

Elegant literature, such as poetry, history, 
biography, and natural philosophy, may be studied 
^ith success. With a mind thus imbued with 
divine and human knowledge, the youth, when 
he steps into the wqrld, will feel and act up to 
the dignity of a rational being. He will be a 
column at once to adorn and strengthen the 
fabric of society ; he wUl perceive his dignified 
situation in the order of created beings, and 
rejoice in the honourable privileges of a ipan and 
a Christian. 

This sketch is submitted to the consideration 
of the middle and lower classes of the community, 
whose very imperfect mode of education requires 
improvement, especially as many of the school- 
masters are incompetent to a trust on which so 
niuch of the happiness of the present and future 
generations depends! Happy, thrice happy, 
would London soon be, if those miserable chiW 
dren who ^e now taught the arts of deceit and 
thievery, were taught to read and write, and had 
their minds early foi-tified with pious precepts, to 
enable them to resist the influence of evil com- 
munications. 

The human soul comes pure and innocent from 

, the handa of its holy Creator ; by its union with 

the body, it becomes liable to the errors and vices 

o 



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StO THE BFGUSH METROPOLIS; 

of fallen man, yet continues endued with facukieflf, 
which, under proper regulations, are productive 
of good ; while its exquisite susceptibility renders 
it liable to rebeive continual impressions from 
surrounding objects. Hence the vast import- 
ancjD of our infantine yelarsy and the necessity (^ 
the early and gradual inculcation of the moral 
duties. 

Parents, look around ! behold the little bloom- 
ing creatures whom Providence has committed 
to your charge. Ah, cultivate their hearts ; rec^ 
tify tlmr judgments > afid their grateftd cevereiice 
will reward your love! Do not imagine tiiat 
your duty to your offspring is confinad to supply- 
ing them with mere necessarie). That is, indeed, 
mdispansable ; but their minds require a much 
more important kind of nutriment. Instil piety 
to 6od^ aad love t^ mankind, as the two great 
principles of human felicity. Teach them to 
]^ai:d the whole <;reation as the production of 
one gteat andi good Beings whose wisdom is un- 
1»wnx}ed« As their &iCQ){bies expand^ let them 
be initiated ia the prrneipl^ of useful seienee, 
^fPk^ tai^bt some att conducive to the commoii 
IP^. Tfaea dbdl your daughters be celebraM 
for their modesty and virtue, anil ycMir wm 
l^ecoQ^ honestii indnsty-ioua, and intelligent men, 
^ glory of their parens, ^nd an honour tt^'tfam* 
coanlNry. 



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on, LONDON IN 1820. V ail 



MODERN MANNEKSr. 

The Eng]i$h national character, in its state of 
unalloyed simplicity in the eountry, i^r ooe of the 
most amiable in the world. Dif nified, sincere, 
honest, modest,, it reseoibles Denham's beautiful 
description of the Thames ; 

" Though deep, yet clear ; though gentle, yet not dull ; 
Strong Tfithout rage, without o'erflowing full."" 

By mingling with ttdrenturers^ firons tari<ms 
nations, m Londion, the purity of the g«nai«i# 
English character is lost In thd city the Ibm 
o^ gain predominates to* such a degree that 
tradefonen conv^srse with cooipkceney on the 
subject of wealth ofataoned by Qwachs^ pufffing 
Publishers, and other impiK^ora: 

The pride ^ merchants avd tpsdesmen,^ from 
lAieir consoiousiKefis of piesseHsing weakh^ is Hbs^vA^ 
yeti tk^ are as proml of the c«it0nt» of their 
wairehoosesatid/sbops^asr if they baol obtained the 
ffmsd^ imei^ by tbeiv' Mvn kvdaBtrjrr Bat m m 
philosophical point at ▼inwv tlia iMvchMt k^Hh^ 
nmrdkamemmm tor the jmAthf wAib> aMeiKb^ ita siirve 
th^ pHrchooer wkb the^ pradbca of a b^mdifedi 
dums. 

Sttib more ndiculMS^ is' tha« prid^ in Ares^ 
wAichi pm9i^ amnQg thee friii^louir ofi bdtb scDtei 

O 2 % 



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212 THB ENGLISH MBTROPOUS ; 

ill London. The tailor or milliner might with 
some propriety feel complacency, on viewing the 
productions of their taste; but the wearer ap- 
pears as much gratified with a costly dress, as if 
it were a peculiar privilege. 

Contrasted with opulence, we behold human 
nature reduced to a wretched state of degrada^- 
tion in this populous city; insomuch that poor 
boys are reduced to the necessity of sweeping 
chimnies, and indigent old men are compelled by 
want to sweep the streets. Menial servants are 
converted into mere machines ; and the herd of 
perfumers and hair dressers who attend on the 
affluent, obtain their livelihood by flattery and 
servility. A step higher is still worse ; for the 
viciauSf or as it is called the fashumable worlds 
gives existence to a train of underlings too 
hideous to l>e mentioned. 

The indecent behaviour of young coxcombs in 
the streets; their scrutinizing stare, and insipid 
grin, are at once disgusting to the manly mind, 
and a proof that purity of heart is almost a 
stranger among the fashionable butterflies who 
lounge in Bond-street and St. James's Park. 

A dangerous cause of the corruption of man- 
jiers among the laborious classes are the ale- 
houses, especially on a Saturday night, when 
mechanics assemble to receive and to spend their 
week's wages. Many of the passages of tkt 



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OR, LONDON IN 1820. 213 

* 

public houses in several parls of the town, are so 
crowded with unfortunate girls, that it is difficult 
to pass along, and they actually stand up in two 
rows to allure the inebriated mechanic, who is 
induced to indulge in wantonness, while his wife 
and children are starving at home. 

A most hideous picture of human depravity is 
also exhibited in the passages to the Theatres, 
while a multitude of dissolute persons of both 
sexes wait to be admitted at half price. The 
saloons are still more dangerous to the incousi* 
derate votary of pleasure. 

That the Public Theatres of London contri- 
bute much to the refinement of manners will' 
scarcely be denied by an accurate observer of 
human nature ; but do they not also tend to the 
refinement of vice, and the depravation of morals? 
They do ! and have introduced a c^rtmn pertne$s, 
of manners, which is substituted for wit in com- 
mon conversation, and an affectation of sensibi- 
lity instead of genuine humanity. 

Private Theatres are particularly pernicious 
to society j at these orgies of folly and rant our 
sober citizens insensibly become the votaries of 
licentiousness, and the man of the world soon, 
learns to act a fictitious part both on and o^tbe 
stage. This fact has been but too truly ascer- 
tained; nay, a tradesman who had been a con- 
spicuous actor at a private theatre, recently called 



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214 THB ENGLISH METROPOLIS; 

a meeting of his creditoi^s, who generously com- 
promised by the acceptance of ten shillings in 
the pound. In consequence of this prudent step, 
our actor soon afterwards adorned the front of 
h^R house with a portico, supported by elegant 
columnSy and surmounted with his name written 
in ktters cfgold! Such is the excellent morality 
inculcatad at pri?ale theatres ; nor are oUr public 
places of entertainment oiloulated t(> make men 
either wiser or better. The theatre may amuse 
those beings, who, lolliag on the lap of luxury, 
sigh for something new ; but it is an undouibted 
fact, that when the gloss of novelty is worn oflF, 
which at first rendered the stage so enchanting, 
almost every person of good sense is disgusted 
with the tinsel trappings, and painted faces of the 
Thespian tribe, who appear very little superior 
to the gesticulators at Bartholomew fair. 

At the same time it must be acknowledged, 
that the stage, under proper regulations, might 
be productive of the most excellent effects in the 
improvement of morals, and it indisputably tends 
to the nefinament of our maniiers. 

Botb tragedy and comedy might be engaged 
as powerful auxiliaries of virtue; but they are 
but too often the handmaids^ of sensuality. 

As for pantomime and fiarce^ they were always 
pui&ril>e aiid contemptible ; a««t such amusements 
Aisnotir attraet the mo^ neatr Westminster aivd 
2 



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OR, LONBOJ? m 1820. 416 

Waterloo brides, must give the stranger a enrioti^ 
idea of the taste of the peoplie of London. 

Musical parties are disgraceful to a warlike 
]^ople like the English. Wiiat can be more frl- 
tdlous, effeta^mate, and absurd, than to behold a 
itauscnlar fellow straining his throat through all 
the variations of a modem bravutaf and ihiitating 
theatrical songsters ? Such exertions migfht be- 
come an Italian, but they degrade amanlyBritbh. 

" Our wives read novels and our daughters plays ; 
To theatres and Fancy Balk they throng, 
And all our grace at table is a song,^^ 



EDMUND ROBBED. — RECElVBS A LETTliSI^ 
l^ROM HIS MISTRESS. — IMPRISONED ON A 
CHARGE OF FORGERY. — A MOTHER'S LET- 
TER TO HER SON. 

When Mr. Brownlow concluded, Edurtinil 
said, ** You have, Sir^ by the variety <tf to^iol 
introduced in your production Mnuaed Die hiubh; 
and if you publish it, your reftttatiovi as a «M;itoift 
will, I think, be edtabttsbsd. It is ih>w a p^ipu 
tious moment to offer yoor pamphlet ) tb^ Satirifsi^ 
the Scourge, and similar puUications, which dil^ 
* graced the £ng^sk press^ n.o Lot^r instdt the 
public eye; and even ftbe political ethioH of tGDtb^ 
bett, Wooler, SherfHu and Co. mU {ttobabl^ 



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216 THS BNGMSH MSTAOPOLIS ; 

cease to inflame the ignorant and discontented 
herd of idle and profligate artisans, and a few 
thousands of the enlightened uxxdliberal residents 
of the metropolis, whose invectives against taxa- 
tion, the ministry, and the episcopacy, originate 
in their envy, avarice, and total absence of reli- 
gious principle and feeling/' " Why, my friend," 
replied Brownlow, " though I differ from you in 
opinion respecting the politics of the day, and 
must for the sake of consistency, as a Whig, 
occasionally censure Tories in power, who, by- 
the-bye, however, are very clever fellows, or 
they could not have retained their places so long; 
yet you are perfectly right as to the probable 
success of my trivial observations on society, 
and if every lover of scandal in London and. 
Westminster will only patronise my work so 
far as to purchase a copy, the sale will exceed 
even that of Moore's Almanack. But enough 
of this; you know we are to go to the Fancy 
Ball in **♦♦♦**♦♦ square next Friday night; 
I shall call at Mr., Bolton's about ten o'clock, 
and shall expect you to be ready at that hour.'' 

This point being settled, Edmund parted with 
his firiend ; as he proceeded to the entrance of 
Mitre Court, the passage was crowded by a 
promiscuous throng, attracted to the spot by a 
dispute between two gentlemen. Edmund en- 
deavoured to pass through the crowd, but found 

1 



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himi^elf very much jostled by several youDg nfien 
who surrounded hitn, and one of vrhom struck 
him with his elbow in the breast. While h6 
pushed the assailant from him, and by ia blow in 
the temple brought him down, he felt his coat 
pocket violently pulled, and in puttings down his 
hand found that his skirt was cut in several 
places, his inside pocket cut open at the bottom, 
and his pocket book, containing bank notes to 
a considerable amount, taken away. There was 
no redress, and having now reached Fleet-street, 
..he called a coach, and on his arrival at Mr. 
Bolton's hastened up stairs to change his coat, 
for the purpose of concealing his misfortune. 
His money was now considerably diminished ; 
he was convinced that BrownloW's account of 
the turpitude of civilized man was just ; and 
sighed to think that a community, which afforded 
such numerous gratifications as that of London* 
should thus abound with depredators, who were a 
disgrace to the human species. 

When he went down to join Mr. Bolton's 
social circle in the drawing-room, a letter was 
presented to him, which at the first glance he 
knew to be in the handwriting of Lady Frances 
— — . He put it in his pocket with some 
emotion, which was observed by Mrs. Bolton, 
who smiling said, ** You are rather incurious^ 
Mr. Yere, respecting the contents of the letter. 



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418 THE fUSGJLISU Metropolts; 

and yet I think I perceived that you wer^ some- 
what affected by the superscriptioiiy how far the 
contents inay prevail in exciting similar emotiooa^ 
is yet unknown/' " O Madam/' replied Ed- 
mund in a cheerful tone, ** this epistle is mer^sly 
from a young friend, with whom. I have beeci 
acquainted about three weeks; it is probably 
unimportant. As for the concern, the traces of 
which you perceived in my countenance, it arose 
partly frcmi the circumstance of my having beea 
robbed in the street this evening/' ^^ Ah^ ipy 
friend !^' exclaimed Mr. Bolton, ^< you must 
learn to keep good hours, and a sharp look oat 
too, if you hope to escape from the dexterity of 
our active citizens. But how much did you 
lose ?'' ** About one hundred and fifty pounds^ 
6ir, which I imprudently kept in my pocket 
}}Qok; but I thought it safe in my inside pocket. 
The pickpocket, however, by cutting a few geo- 
mc^tricar figures on the skirt of my coat, soon 
opened an entrance, to my treasure, and I deserve 
to lose ic for my inattention.^' 

About ten o'clock Edmund complained of a 
slight indisposition, and made that a pretext for 
retiring to his bedchamber at that early hour. 
On entering the room he broke open the letter 
with aU the eagerness of a successful lover, and 
read the followinglines. 



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OR, LONBON IN t^9. 319 

D£AR Edmund, 

The unexpected return of my father from 
the continent, requires this brief notificatiofi of 
an event with which 6ur mutual happiness i)y so 
intimately connected. He arr^ed at noon to-- 
day >in excellent healih and spt rits^ and purposes 
to set out #itli me to Renfrew CSastle in Soot> 
land ; . so. that unless we are io be separated^ 
beyond the probability of a fatvre funiori, or ^vetk' 
a meeting, it will be requisite for you to meei 
me at the house of a friend, No. — , Conduitt-- 
street, Bond-street^ to-morrow evening at elgfit 
o'clock. Your determination during that iutelr-^ 
view will decide the fate of your 

Frances *^**'*. 

• 

" Then we must get .the start of the old gen- 
tleman," cried Edmund, '* and at 6tMM, ih 
bis native country, realize that Miss to ithich Ah 
austere and proud parent would never confs^nt.^' 
He then opened his trunk, and exafnined the 
state of his funds : neairly o^e hundred pounds 
yet remained. ** It will be quite sUfficienft fet* 
oor matrimonial excursion/* Mtid he^ ** and stfteN 
wardb my lathier wffl rea<>9y give us a supply.*^ 
With these pleasing reile:^iofis be tttited to ftiait, 
and fell asleep amid tbttt deli(^i<ms rev^fre ia 
whiob tile aMioijmtion^^ apprdiicbllfg Im^itMnit 



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S20 THE ENGLISH MCXROPOLIS ; 

passed through his imagination in all the beau- 
teous forms of love, embellished with gayest 
tints of hope, and illumined by the sunny smiles 
of joy. He little knew the twofold peril to which 
be was exposed, by the wiles of a demirep, and 
the arts of a sharper. 

Next morning after breakfSast, Edmund went 
to his chamber, and made up a small parcel of 
luffS^g^ for the following night's intended elope- 
meut. As the morning was frosty, and the 
weather fair, he walked out on a morning visit 
to Sir Thomas Touchstone ; but he had not pro- 
ceeded four hundred yards from Mr. Bolton's 
door, when he was accosted by a man who fol- 
lowed him, with' the inquiry, " Pray, Sir, is 
your name Vere?." " Yes, Sir," replied Edmund. 
" Edmund Vere, Sir ?*' " Yes," rejoined Ed- 
mund, with some surprise at the inquisitiveness 
of the stranger, <^ that is my name, why do you 
ask ?^' *f Because, Sir, I have a warrant against 
you on a very serious charge. I request, Sir, 
that you will make no resistance,^' continued 
the man, seeing Edmund look angry. ** I 
am an officer of the police. Sir, and am 
merely doing my duty. You must come with 
me. Sir." The officer then pulled out a 
pistol, and making a signal to another con- 
federate, a coach was called, in which Edmund 
went with the two officers to tlie Police Office 



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OK, LONDON IN 1820. 221 

ja Queen Square, where a magistrate was then 
sitting. 

When Edmund entered the office, he was 
recognised by the jeweller to whom he had paid 
the Bank Post Bill which he received from Ray- 
mond. " This, may it please your worship,'' 
said the tradesman, ** i» the person who paid tne 
the forged bill.^' A clerk from the Bank of 
England attended to prove the forgery. Ed- 
mund inquired whether he might send for a 
friend ; but the magistrate, ratKer sternly, in- 
formed him that his offence was not bailable ; 
and without hesitation wrote his mittimus. He 
was conveyed in a coach without delay to New- 
gate, and on entering this abode of misery and 
crime, was taken to a felon's cell. He was 
shocked, and inquired whether he could not be 
accommodated with a better apartment. ^^ Yes, 
yes,'" replied the turnkey, ** if you can command 
money; its power is great even in a prison.'' 
*^ Then take me to. a more' comfortable place.'' 
The turnkey, however, locked him in; but re- 
turned in about half an hour, and led him to a 
room tolerably furnished, and where a good fire 
softened the rigour of a winter's day. The turn- 
key now desired to know whether he wished for 
refreshments, . and Edmund ordered a mutton 
chop and a bojttle of wine. Not that he felt the 
cravings of hunger, but because he supposed that 



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223 THE ENGLISH METHOPOUS J 

the profits of whatever he ordered wonld cause 
the turnkey to treat him with more attention and 
bomanity. He then wrote to Mr. Bolton, with 
a short account of his situation, and gave the 
tmrnkey a crown to dispatch an errand boy with 
the letter. 

When ak)ne, Edmund endeavoured to cahn 
the perturbation of his mind. The events of the 
morning had been so unexpected, as well as 
calamitous, and passed in such rapid succession, 
Aat a review of them seemed like an unpleasant 
dream ; but when he looked around, and beheld 
the bohs and bars with which he wa» environed, 
he shnddered with iustinetive horror at his 
Areadfu) situation, and sickened while he exe-» 
crated the treachery ef mankind. 

While he indulged these gloomy reflections, 
the door of h\& apartment was opened, and Mr. 
Bwersil entered with a countenance as pale as 
death. He happened to be passing as EdkmitMi 
steppe^ out of the coach, and the icka that he 
might be of some service,, induced him- to caHf at 
tihe prison, on bis nM^n fro» a prinifng' office 
te wphicb he was* taking some copy of a work 
which was then in the press% There wa& seme 
consolation in^ the presence of an acquaintance ; 
and, as Edomnd arose to shake haiiidb witt 
Buersil, tear» stafiied frew the eyes^ ef the York- 
shire critic^ while heexclatmed, ^ CtoodBbtveit^ 



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OR, liONDON IN 1820. 22S 

Mr. Vere, what can this mean? Why do I see 
you here ?" Edmund then,, in a few words, 
informed his friend of his irreparable misfortune, 
and the countenance of the hearer was expressive 
of the grief of his mind. " Nothing can save 
yod, Sir,'* said he, *• but the discovery of the 
villain, who, while he swindled you out of your 
money, meditated your destruction. Do you 
know his name, and can you describe his per- 
son ?'^ Edmund satisfied Buersil respecting both 
these particulars, and he b^stened away to em-* 
ploy a number of police officers to discover the 
misereant. 

About fomr o'clock in the afternoon Mr. BoHon 
arriy^d at Newgate. Edmund felt humiliated 
at this interview ; bis friend perceived his cha- 
grin, and hinted the necessity of immediately 
writing to his father, " I shall write to Mr. 
Vere,'* said he, ^ with a siaiple* statement of 
civeub^stances ; he will doubtless hasten to Lon- 
don» where t hope that our united influence will 
extiiqate you from this dreadfttl misfortune.'^ 
Edmund concnrped. with his friend in this plan, 
and Mr, Bolton soon afterwards departed iVom 
the prison^ 

DiiHi6F was now served up to the solitary 
dupe of* n^etropolitan deception : and notwith- 
fltending the tremendous abyss into which he 
I |)langed> yet the excellence of his constitu- 



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224 THE ENGLISH M£T&QPOUS; 

tion enabled him to take some refreshment with 
a good appetite. After dinner he reviewed the 
events of his life since his arrival in London, and 
discovered that his open and unsaspicioas heart 
misled him to cherish too good an opinion of 
mankind. But Lady Frances, the lovely and 
tender Lady Frances, surely she was not deceit- 
ful ; that idea alone operated as a cordial' to his 
spirits; but he recollected with grief, that it was 
impossible for him to gratify their mutual wishes 
by an elopement. An apology was indispensa- 
ble: he did not think it decorous to date his 
letter from a prison ; and therefore wrote as it 
appeared from the Chapter Coffee House, in- 
forming her that an unforeseen event pnt it 
totally out of his power to meet her on the fol- 
lowing evening. 

On the fourth afternoon of Edmund's confine- 
ment Mr. Bolton again visited him, and informed^ 
him that his father had arrived that morning, and 
wiis busily engaged in consulting lawyers on the 
nature of the charge against him, and the possi* 
bility of effecting his speedy liberation. The 
tears filled Edmund's eyes, and his bosom heaved 
with filial gratitude and affection to so good a 
parent. *^ He will visit you this evening, my 
friend,'^ said Mr. Bolton, ** so keep up ypur 
spirits and hope the best. Your other relations^ 
have not forgot you ; here is a letter from your 



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imothiBTi .wfaSck yoa wiU ^obably like to read 
without witnesses ; I sbal4^ therefore, retire^" 
With these words he left the 1:00m, and Edmund 
with a palpitating heart,. an<) aljnost overpowered 
by bis emotions, perused the following effusion of 
maternal Jove. m - t;= ! 



A SCOtHBR'S LfiTTBB^O HXUt SOfN. 

^' ...:.: ■ - , ; ' . . • ' J •■.:■••]''■ 

This is my first letter ta my only ^ora^ and' ob ! 
in what a< situation, is my. Edmund ? — 'The • eUkl 
0£ my yoB^, and the darling of my heartt in 
•prvsidiif-^perbaps in chains! Oh Sdmund 1 1 fur- 
give ;yQi^ inbther*s; womanish ifiraentation, lor I 
^mustpeorifiirth the iedings of my full-: heart to 
..you,imyi dearest child; — instead^ of , laiparli^ng 
:.oaB»lbtt to yon, I Myself: need coBli^4tioB-rfor 
an^oisb^a bitter and indescribable ftuguisb^ has 
iaikeu porisBSsioo of my $oiiK I tjremble at evety 
^und — 1i dread every knock at my dOor,; lest 
iotelltgejo^e, not to be survived^ should bei an- 
! npunced: :hy some, messenger When. you. .9pt 
out. for/ Loodopy 1 felt sad forebodings of^ qv.i1; 
.bilt coafii^g iu. the virtne of my toa^ I: bofned 
syoa.would escape the snares of thatseat.of £()^y 
and iniquity. , » 

J • IJooked . into Gowper's Task the other day. 



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336 THIS BKOUSH MBTRQ^OLIS ; 

and turniafi^ to his deaeriptioa - of London^ mat 
the foUowiog passage r ! 

" Th6 shark is there, 

And the shark's prey:** * 



I shuddered at the danger with wkiek 'yon 
surrounded. The next day*s post brought the 
dreadful tidings, that you were imprisoned in 
Newgate on a. chargie^ of iwgtrj i : In wx^nstant. 
Spring Hill House, so long the abode of inno- 
omce and ^Meoity^ was efaangied iinio ^ tiooBe of 
ttMmmiiig. ^* A kttisr from Mr. BokoB,? saU 
yoarfather^ ^ Ai'ci there no lettttln fromBd- 
muad, Sir ?*^ txelaikBod Maria mpA Hf mst lio^h 
at #Doe. ^ No/' ^Mas the reply« I kefimj eye 
on your father wliile im' teBdiumiitnadg^m^ iaAm s 
ezpMtariidii of itearmg'iioine oews^ffom/yon. 
He aoddeiily oeased to read-«tura«d pale^^^ond 
nsing, walked up ateirs Willi the cfMi letter in 
kisfaand. Ilblfcwed hiq» in bveaidri^sf temt*. 

-H Ir Ednnrnd Ul^ my dparP'^said L -^<NV^ 
mid y oar father, in a hollow tone 4kat pieneed 
my heart. He threivr btmself onik iictfia^^-ifMped 
lor breath*J^«and seemed netually dyingv when 4lie 

:-ftrst team I ^ver saw- bim shed, atfa^ded him 
ttbmentttry mlief. I<4hrew my afmr nsond ^s 
neck and wept with him, still ignprapt of (tlie 
loU tttent of ow oommop calaniity. Ast length. 



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tim >0K90N IN 1830. ^27 ^ 

your father said ia alow and solemn tone, ^' Ed- 
mond a criminal— in irons-^and in jeopardy of 
his life! — bankruptcy, beggary, pain, nay even 
death itself were felicity to a degradation like 
thW I conld hear no mof e— my head grew gid- 
dy — the sight for$ook my eyes, anc| with a groan 
I swooned away. On my recovery, I found yoi^r 
father and sisters supporting me in bed, and 
mingling their tears. <^ She lives t our beloved 
mother and friend lives T' exclaimed Maria. 
"Thank God! thank God!'' was all your.falher 
could utter, with his eyes turned towards heaven 
in solemn devotion. 

Since that time I have been rather unwell. I 
weep, yet tears give me little relief;- for the hor- 
ror I feel every time I think that my only— my 
amiable boy-'-*a youth so universally esteemed and 
beloved, has become the victim of villains, for 
their accomplice he can never have been-— -to 
thii^k that my kind^^hearted Sdmiind, the pride 
and hope of our famiIy»now lies imprisoned for a 
crime, which is of such a nature.a9 to render even 
mercy inexorable — that )^ maybe triedf C09* 
victed, condemned — I would not conclude the 
i^entence for the wealth of Eogland ! My child, 
on whose benefit brow, th^ dig^nity of virtue is so 
distinctly imprest, caa never wfer******. No! 
that Provid^oc? wbkh protected k^ infaocy and 
yootbi wittt if a wothtr'a pr^yw9 ia^h^iu>d» yet 

V 2 

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228 THE ENGLISH METROPOLIS; 

interpose to save my beloved; restore him to ho« 
nourable society, and defeat all the artifices of the 
emissaries of hell. 

Your pocket-bible now lies open before me, 
and I find the following* words marked with a 
pencil, perhaps by your own hand : ** My son, 
when sinners entice thee, consent thou not.*' Why 
did not my dearest child take this celestial moni- 
tor with him to London? What are the accom- 
plishments of polished life, or the curiosities in- 
vented by human ingenuity, in comparison to that 
wisdom which at once humanizes, enlightens, ex- 
alts, and renovates; and that faith which opens 
the portals of immortality and happiness? 

I send this letter under cover to Mr. Bolton : 
your father set out yesterday for London. Adieu, 
my son ! The blessing of a tender, solicitous, 
and mournful niother, and above all the protec- 
tion and blessing of htm who is able to save, be 
your safeguard and consolation in this period of 
dire tribulation — of imminent peril! Farewell, 
my beloved Edmund ! Your sisters join their 
prayers and tears with mine. Farewell. 

Mary Verb. 

Spring-Hlll BfoUse, January 20, 1820. 

This tender and monitory letter was perused 
by Edmund with various emotions. Sometimes a 
strong sense of ishame at his own folly, in being 
M^easily outwitted by a sharper ; then indigna- 



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ORf LONDON IN 1820. 229 

tion against the miscreant who had brought him 
into his present dangerous sitaation; but the 
predominant idea was grief, for the sufferings of 
his pious and affectionate mother. ''Ah ! *' cried 
lie, wfth a voice broken by excessive sensibility 
and sympathy, ^' I have destroyed the health, and 
interrupted the serenity of that pure linind which 
never felt anguish for its own indiscretion, be- 
cause it has ever been virtuous. My dearest pa** 
rent now languishes under the two-fold, affliction 
of fear and sorrow, and my unhappy inexperience 
is the cause of her misery. Q merciful Creator, 
permit me to escape from this destructive snare 
in which I am entangled, and my life shall be de- 
voted to thy glory, and the welfare of my fellow 
creatures/' Overcome by strong emotion, !E!d- 
mund direw himself on his knees, and poured 
forth his supplications to the great preserver of 
men. His mind was tranquillized by devotion, 
and he arose with a presentiment that deliverance 
was nigh. Whilst he continued in this state^ 
his father, acoompanied by Mr. Bokon; entered 
the room ; Edmund felt a blush rise to his face as 
his father advanced with an extended hand. Mr. 
Vere pressed the hand of his son, but coqld not 
speak, and the youth, quite overcome by the dis- 
tress of his parent, turned away his face — sobbed, 
and wept audibly. Mr. Bolton took the hands of 
the unhappy father and son, and leading them io 



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2S2 THE^ENGIMH MtTEOPOL^S; 

might irettirii from that town by thecoaich.^'I Kr« 

compelled by k shower of snow, to seek ibbeltc¥ 

itr an ale-hotf^e on the common. On my * arrival, 

I ioutiA th^t'serc^ral persons had availed them^ 

siilv^ olf *the' hospitality of my' tondk>rd« and 

aihoft^bthei*s,thhee gnentlemen from London, who 

bad' taken posufessibn t>f a ismalJ room in the rear 

dPthii hoase, separated from^ front pai*kmr' by al 

paii*tilibfi. As I sat musing* over my giras^fne^ 

^s; T heard whispers; and curiosity incited me 

to listen. A' small crevice in the waH enaMetl 

itae to (ybserre the patty, and to hear theiir^ dis- 

(joutiie. '^'^tiamust be very liaiitious, Rltymond/- 

Mtdbne of i;henri,' lea^in^ towards another^ <«:or 

yen wiH ^ttttnry be takeni. Recollect 'that ybur 

stay in-br*' hear Lofnddti,' may prove ^ fetal/* 

" True," replied another, •*but-Wkily, my dope 

if'Al stifier'/ and then I need* tiot dread either 

v^itness or fAt>secationi In the mean time, how^ 

eVer,-it'Witl be advisfkble^bgo td. the continent} 

I intend to dle^ at ■ ( ^ ' - ^ m . in the Boraug^ to^ 

night, and to-morrow morning, before sbn-riae, I 

shall set oiit m the coach for Dover.!' '« That will 

bo^dvtsabte, Raymodd >/Hwi8fa you a good woy* 

ttge, aild a Bpeedy^jouniey tolhe Wotid unknown 

to yoa# Lancashire friieQ^u^/ . 

V'.1 4Mad now-heaid .eiuDtt^h^''. ooatpnued Boep^ 
iflv ^ tO'iOotiviaee .ine<tllat the.crimipal whobe* 
frayed toy IHend, wasjin^viMir; I started up> inr 



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OR, X.OXBON IN 1820. SS3 

fbrabedthe landlord secretly of the ciroutnsfance, 
who immediately sent to Mitcbam for a consta*- 
Ue; and borrowing a sword from my bost^ placed 
myself ilear the door of tbe room where. Raymond 
sat, resolved to take him prisoner, or die 
dn the q>ot When die constdi>le arrived, we 
entered the room ; surprised the party before 
they could stand on their defence, and made 
them prisoners. We brought them to town in 
one of the Mitcbam stage coaches, and yba 
know the rest/' 

Mr. Vere expressed his thanks to. Buersil in 
a very animated manner, and insisted on him 
acceptance of two hundred poundsfor the service- 
he hiad rendered his son. Mr. Buersil soon 
afterwards parted Wit^ Edmund, who was glad 
of an opportunity of retiring from Uie observa* 
tion of his friends, in whose presence, notwith- 
standing his probity, he ielt deep humiliation. 

But though his pride was deeply wounded, his 
passion for Lady Frances continued undimi* 
ni<iibed. This he felt the moment he was alone ; 
and anxious to learn whether she had been taken 
to i^cotland by her father, he set out on foot, 
soon after* dinner, for her residence in Wimpole- 
street. 

When he arrived at tbe door, he found it open, 
and passed along the hall unperceived by any of 
the servants. Lightly tripping up stairs, he ap- 




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384 THE SMCtUSH MET&OPCnLlS } 

proached the door of tke dr&wittg^I1o«rtt9^wb9ll 
the sound of his charmer'B voice cmiised him to 
stop« She wis io conversation witfa aiH)tbclr 
person, and fleemed in hig^ spirits^ ni she hiighed 
heartilj. He listened a moment, kad^ from tho 
ejrpressfons of her componien, be was oenvillced* 
her father was not present. Jealousy dmde .hhni 
impotuousand incoiisiderat^ } hemsfaedinto thit 
apartiDtnt^ and beheld his beaulifiil Duloiooit 
del Tobosoy sitting familiarly on «tlle hbee of a^ 
young gentleman, witK her arihs arodnd liis' 
neck, and her bead on lus br^st. Th'eybbth 
turned their faces towards the door; Lady Frances 
uttm*ed a scream, and fell on the floor;, ber 
companion mised her, placed her on a*sofa,iaad 
faming fiercely to Edmund, demanded why iie 
presumed to intrude on his priracy in his own 
house. ^ Your house ?- ' cried Edmuad, << ia 
not this tte residence of Lady Frances ***'f ^¥* 
lie was answered by a contemptudus laugh Sthm 
ihe gentleman, who, tomiag to the lady, ex«' 
rclaimed, <* Well, Fanny, what new frolic have 
yon been playing?^* '' Til tell you another 
time," whispered she ; ^^ get this rustk away as 
well as you can." Edmund heard the latter part 
of her speech; he was now convinced that ho 
had been nearly allured into marriage. by an 
accomplished demirep ; and looking aSt her witb 
indignant contempt, he turned on Us lieel« 



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WAUc0d>dt>WD stairS) and depavted from the Imnim 
wttb indwciibable fttl'mgn. 

On iiir r^irn to Mr./BoUon't, he joined the 
tsooial ptifUfi hut bii efiimrt to appear cheerful 
wasi imsueeeififal } and from tiiM to time be fell 
into? a abort mod onpleasaiit re^em, wbkh bis 
father^ latid Mr. and Mrs. Boltoti^ attributed to 
bis'ibelingffii^^»air€^iew d bts late embarrass^ 
ment. He was rallied into some attention by 
the good humour of bis host, and was more 
lively towards the close of the evening's conver- 
satiofa/ ^ When he retired tc^ his ehatnber, how- 
ever, td ** meet hfs'ttaked^h^rtfdotte/' h6 felt 
all the mortification and. misery of a rustic dupe 
to the dangerous artifices continually practised in 
Londiitt. " To wli»tpurpoi9e/' cried he^ in 
^g^^y^ *^ have I listened to tbe cautiona of 
B^wmloW) when I am thus imposed upon at 
evefy comer? Bot tb^^re are gradations of vir* 
toe/ and models of worth nmong mankind ; let 
me cultivitte an intimacy with them, and be more 
circtifl^pect in my future intercoume with stran*- 
ger^ J for I ^d, to my deep regret, that— 

*' A man may smil6, and smile, and be a villain, 
At least I*m 6lire it may be so iti liOndon.*' 

Asi for womanr who ppuld believe that such a. 
beautf^Up and courteoui^ beings as the girl I once 
loved, could beso unblushing a deceiver R Never 



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1 



ilSd THE SNGMSH METROPOLIS; 

agaia will I trastto my own sagncity in the choice 
of a mistress : no— I must employ Brownlow, or 
some other adept in the soienoe of pbysiognamy, 
to find that rare combination of female excel* 
lence» a beautifttl fece, a modest miadi and an 
afiectionate heart.'" After thia rhapsody, Edmatid 
went to bed» where the ** bsllm of hurt minds/' 
a sound sleep, operated as « complete restora* 
tive. 



AN UNBXPJ50TBJ> EVBNT|r-A JAUNTTTO XAN- 
CASHIRE. — A FAHILT MEETING.— CONCLU- 
SION. 

A week soon passed awiqr from the time of 
Edmund's liberation^ during which, his fatbw 
looked over the state of his accounts with his 
partner Mr. Bolton, and when Uiat business was 
finished prepared for his return to Spring, Hill 
House. Edouind was obliged to appear as a 
witness to criminate Raymondi and intended to 
remain in town till the termina^tion of the sessions 
at the Old Bailey in February ; but an incident 
equally unexpected and unforeseen, required his 
immediate presence at his birthplace. A letter 
from his sister to their father, communicated in- 
telligence of a most afflictive nature. It was a^ 
follows: 

2 



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OK, LOm>ON IN 1820. 837 

Dj&ARFATmSB, 

I entreat yoa to return home as speedily as 
possible. — ^My mother is very ill indeed: she 
was so overcome with joy on receiving an ac- 
count of Edmund's release from prison, that 
nature sunk under the strong emotion. She is 
noW| thank heaven, quite serene ; .but so debili- 
tated, that I shudder at my anticipations. Per- 
haps Edmund can accompany yoti.* Return, I 
beseech you, withbnt^delay. 

Maria Vbre. ' 

Spring Hill House, Jan. 28, 1«26. 

Mr. Vere read this letter with inexpressible 
anguish, and raising his eyes to heaven, exdaim- 
ed, *^ In what a dreadful series of calamities has 
the inexperience of Edmund involved our once 
happy^ family ! but perhaps the fears of Marid 
h^ve magnified the danger,, and my beloved 
wife will yet be permitted to cheer and enlighten 
h^r family and friends.*' He then hastened to 
inform his son that their presence was reiquired 
at home; and they proceeded in a chaise and 
four, with the velocity of a winter's gale, towards 
Lancashire. 

On their arrival at Spring Hill House, they 
were shocked at' the stillness and solitude of a 
spot, so often the scen6 of rural gaiety and asi- 



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998 THE E|WLI«|«[ ItfiTVOPQUS; 

tnation. Edmund followed his father into the 
hall with a heart palpitatidg with alfectkmate 
9|>prehension. They went into the ps^loor, 
where, in 9^ few mooients^ Maria fuid Harriet 
c»me to meet tbeip. Th^ paleness and evident 
affliction of the youn^ ladies terri$ed thej^ faUi^r, 
who articulated, with e?tr^«ie difficulty, and in 
a voice aUnost stifled by emotion, ^* Hbw is 
your mother?" "Ah, Sir!" said Mari*, in a 
querulous tone, " she is, I fear — r— '* Sobs in* 
terrupted articulation, but tears brought a friendly 
relief. ** This morning," continued she, ** Dr. 
L > paid his regular visit ; he seemed 

much alarmed at the state in which be found my 
iViother, and appeared to consider her recovery 
hopeless. He ordered no medicine ; but I pSrr 
spaded my dear parent to^ take ^ litUe warm 
vphey, and about four hovm ago she sunk into a 
deep sleepi from which she has not yet waked, 
and perhaps it may prove salutary," *\Q heavev 
grant that it may!" cried £ldmnnd| k^^eling 
down on the floor, and with upraised eyes and 
bands, while the tears trickled down bis cheeks^ 
ho solemnly ejaculated, ''Most merciful Bking 
of Beings^ bless > and restore, I beseech Thee, 
my parent to her friends ! that mothor whom I 
over loved^ but whose sacred lifo I have un- 
wittingly ^df^ngered I" Mr. V§ro rnm^ \w 
son, prcssaod Im h4nd> 9nd sitting ^own on a sofa 



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OR, LOVDOV IK 1820. 339 

beside hiim they gave Ml veirt talheir monrnfiil 
feelings! by an effasHMitof tears, TftBLe the yowag 
k^Uds faaiteded tip stairs tobe ki atteodaaee upon 
thdif motlier* ' 

In less llian half t^B heur a .fewmb servaiit 
bameib mAmn fcl» gsenUemeo ^al ber i^iBtiteis 
wasa^wake^and^xptcted t»«6e>the». EdoHuicl 
startiid up, end ifollewed his father. They ei»- 
tered the chamber, if hem Mrs^ Yetie^ sapporied 
by lier daugfatera, eat up ia > the bed. On their 
approach she heM logi her hands^ fetnd wiUi a look 
of taeiabk beatgnitji; and tendeii affectum, aeid, 
is A.bur voioe,.^ My prayers bare been beard^ 
I ampeniuttediid s^oay dearest ItieMb again/^ 
She paused' " -i m ii Mn Vene faeU her rigfat 
hand, and Bdnuind her left, urbile Aey beat ten^ 
derly over her. « Wbataehange bad ten diay» 
made in the appearaaee of this excellent WMaan! 
She was only in ber fortieth yemr, and admired 
by ber irieads and acquaintance for the beauty 
of her peraoa, and tbe amtaUeness ef her^ispe^ 
aitien. But the vermeil bleom of faealtb mkidk 
4ately adorniE^ ber cheek, g»re ^aee te the 
jbded bne ef the witheretl rose ; her eyes, ^^vi^dk 
beamed m\tk tbe aniination of {wiith, end the 
beauty of sentienent, were now holbw, yet they 
etai^irtened with the ligte «f sensibility j her 
feati^res were shmnk, and die eaprewiett of her 
f>aUid coantenaace was that of extreme debility. 
Mr. Yete gaeed on the rains ef hiti Mary with 



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240 THV SiNGUSH MVTROPOU9 ; 

f^ef and tenderness — he would have spoken, but 
a^emn awe interrupted thespeechof all present, 
' except the dyings saint. '' You are both welcofloie 
home/' said she ; *^ my last wish is gratified by 
jour presence. . My departure will now be a 
triumph. My ever .faithful and tender husband, 
bow with resignation* as I do» to the will «f 
our GrOD— forour daughters^ I have no fear*-- 
:lhey are both amiable and pious, and as such are 
under the jNirticular protection of Omnifo- 
f JDNCE — our Edmund too^ restored to honour, 
.reputation, and'86eiety,.will, I trust, be preserved 
from^future evili My dear Edmund," continued 
timi ^nng l^r eyes towards her iKm, ^* your re- 
^tu*R in^ftafety has reltlized my hope-^bewave of 
eiril i <sotomdaiokition&; read your bible; let it 
\m0r he your guide, : liad you will be happy 
iw' ever*$«-I :now have dose with life— yet these 
iearthly tiie s" /m ' ' '" said she, in a voice attuned 
by . tenderness, while she gazed altematriy on 
her husband and sUi'^**^*^^ the heart feds a|Hing 

at. parting y^i\h those we love" She pmised 

*.^r-^feebly i^essed the himds whibh^held hers--^ 
diea sunk down in theanns of her daughters, 
Hodiwith.a deep eigb expired, while her happy 
fpitit; soared to the bliwful regions of immor- 
tefity^ But what pen could descinbe the scene 
-which tMuedijOr the grief of ^e survivors ^ ^ ^ 
4^'-^ i K j« «f ♦ : ^ « m m m' m ^m- m. m m 
ft ,-♦•,*; > .*i; ♦' f .. *i f *. ♦ ♦ ♦-•' *. •** 



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FREE STRICTURES 



on 



ENGLISH LITERATURE. 



Duns Part d*intereuer eonsiiie Pttrt d'Scrire. . Deluxe. 



If we estimate the intellectual powers of a 
p^pk by their literary productions, those of the 
English will be found of the first order, and en- 
titled to pre-eminence. Beautifnl specimens of 
style and composition, on every subject which 
can gratify the curiosity, improve the knowledge,^ 
or polish the manners of a human being, may be 
found in our language ; and we can produce the 
works of native philosophers, poets, and histo- 
rians, unequalled by those of the literati of any 
other nation either ancient or modem. For this 
peculiar excellence in the brightest emanations 
of the mind, we are principally indebted to the 
Reformation, which first set the inquiring spirit 
of man free, and erected that powerful organ of 
knowledge, the Press. Science and taste, of- 
fered their powerful aid to truth ; the valuable 
facts, discovered and recorded by the experiment 

a 



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242 THE ENGLISH METROPOUS ; 

tal philosopher, were adorned with the graces of 
poetical • and prosaic coa^^osition, and wisdom 
and beauty were united by reason. 

We have now the treasures of ancient and mo- 
dern literature in our native language, for seve- 
ral of our ingenious and learned mon haye, by 
spirited and elegant translations of the ancient 
classics, and of the valuable works bf Continen- 
tal writers, enriched the English library with the 
wisdom of all ages<; and thus, in the true spirit 
of universal benevolence, imported whatever was 
rarejt elegaut, or beaatiful in foreign langoagea^ 
and exported their own original productions^ to 
ipst(uct and enlighten tbcj comparatively unia- 
fpirm^d and superstitious nations of CbristendoiiH 
wy, of eveiry part of the habit^tble globe. The 
English reader may now obtain, from the works 
and translation^ of bis countrymen, suiBcient in- 
formation for every purpose of utility or enter* 
tainment; and this communicable facility^ has 
contributed tp a general laste for literature, and 
the coi^e(][uent increftse of books in this opulent 
country;, insomuchi that a library is now consi* 
dered a^ indispensable in a magniQcent KaajQ«ion« 
as any other kind^ of ornameotal and costly fur- 
niture.. No.r. is this love of knowledg;e confined 
to the pp^lenty for many iudi^tri^us tradesmen 
aAd in^enipus artisans, exf^end that n^aney in 
the purcb.ase of Vokfi which th^ir wore impro^ 



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OK, LONDON IN 1820. 243 

rident or vulgar neiglitioors woold have wasted 
in Bacchanalian orgies ; and thus, a very general 
difinsion of scientific, moral, and divine truth, 
baa gradottlly exalted the character of tb« nation 
for correct habits of thinking, and ioaproved/good 
seoae, above that of other European contempora^ 
ries. Indeed, a retrospective glance at the pro- 
gressive improvement of our national literature, 
will affioird a pleasing illustration of our present 
Ikianners, morals, and the superior civilisation 
which we have so happily attained. 

The comprehensive and invaluable works of 
Bacon, Locke, Newton, and other English 
philosophers, enriched our literature with the 
treasures of human wisdom ; while the sublime 
and pathetic poetry of Shakspeare and Mil- 
t6n^ and the harmonious productions of Dry- 
Bfiw and Pope, established tbe superiority of the - 
British tnnse. These itnmortal sages and bards 
were succeeded by othei' authors, whoBe taste and 
judgment gave the last polish to the language in 
which they wrote, while their lively censure of the 
foibles and vices of tiieir contemporaries, and 
their ekiqnent recommendatioli of a pure and 
practicable morality, improved the manners of 
the age. Ai the commencement of the eigh- 
teenth centory Englaiid could bo4st of men of 
gieiuas whoae exorilence in every species <^ com- 
pMitioB Was uneqimlled in the wwld. English 
a2 



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244 THE ENGUSH METROPOLIS; 

literature was brought to the highest possible 
perfection by the emulative efforts of Adi>ison, 
Pope, Watts, Rowb, Swipt, Gay, and 
Thomson. These elegant writers were suc- 
ceeded by Johnson, Goldsmith, Hawkes- 
WORTH, Young, Gra^, mmI several other 
eminent authors, whose productions at once ctn^ 
tributed to the refinement of language, manners^ 
and morals; and in the present age, Cowper, 
by his exact descriptions of rural scenery, and 
modern manners; his manly censure of profligacy; 
And his impressive and energetic ilhistrations of 
the value of civil and religious liberty, and the 
happiness communicable by humanity and piety, 
has promoted the best interests of society with 
greater success than all his contemporaries. 

A general taste for the beauties of litwature 
has thus been happily cherished in Englaikl, 
where the most powerful efforts of the free and 
enlightened human mind have been successfully 
exerted for individual reputation and public be* 
nefit. Reading has in the present age become a 
favourite amusement with the people of this 
country ; from the opulence supplied by mai^u- 
factures and commerce, the art of printing has 
been improved at least to a co*e<|^ d^ree of 
elegance and beauty with any ^ther of the fine 
arts, and a very general dissemination of know-* 
ledge and intellectual entertai^meot has coAse^ 



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OB, LONDON IN 1820. 245 

quently been effected, especially among the gen- 
teel dasses of society. From this universality of 
reading, $l considerable number of writers have 
sprung up, and the utmost facility has been af- 
forded to their literary essays by those periodical 
publications termed magazines, which presented ' 
a favourable medium for the voluntary contribu- 
tions of youthful genius, in its first efforts for the 
acquisition of popular approbation. 

Another species of literary composition has 
for ages been generally patronized in England. 
The natural love of novelty suggested to inven- 
tive genius, the production of romances. Seve- 
ral voluminous narratives, abounding with mar- 
vellous exploits and incidents of the days of chi- 
valry, for centuries occupied the shelves appro- 
priated to prosaic works of fiction ; but these 
were displaced to make room for those lighter 
pieces,' known; by the general name of Novels, in 
which every variety of romantic composition was 
adopted, according to the taste of the writer. 
These productions soon became popular ; in them 
the intrigues, perilous adventures, vicissitudes, 
and sufferingsM^f loyers, wer^ detailed in the fa- 
miliar rtyle of conversation, and the imagination 
was captivated by a narrative related with an 
ease and ingenuity which gave it all the charms 
of reality « The novels of Rich abdson, Fislb- 
INO9 Smox^ustt, and Gox^DSitf ith, have estab^ 



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246 THB ENGLISH MBTftOPtfLIS} 

lished our claims to miperiority in this braiHsh ^ 
literature, though our countrymen undoubtedly 
availed themselves of the aid of foreign noveb 
and rbmances; and it must be acknowledged, 
that for genuine, amusing, and characteristic Ha- 
tire, we have no composition in our language 
equal to Don Quixote, and Gil Bias; works which 
have immortaliaed their authors, and established 
the claims of CfiRVANTBS and Ls Sagb, to the 
admiration of mankinds 

The epistolary novels of Rich arbson became 
so popular, that numerous imitators appeared and 
vanished in succession. Circulating libraries 
now began to be established in the most popu^- 
lous cities and towns of England, and reading 
g^dually became one of the amusements of the 
common people* Publishers^ who had hitherto 
treated authors with civility and eyen respect, 
began to assume more consequence, and this was 
increased by the servility of a new tribe of Hterati ; 
those translators, abridgers, and compilers, who 
produced a variety of mutilated works, such as 
abridgments of Upiversal History, Tours^ and 
the Beauties of eminent poets and prose writers* 
- In poetry, there has also been a considerable 
revdntion of taste, and like most innovations, it 
has been prejudicial. Our modern satirists,' par« 
licularlyCHURcniiiii, Dr. WoL€H>t*, andliOitB 
Byron, are equaHy saroa$tie and ilMkeraL An- 

3 



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OR, LOXDO* IN 1820. 247 

other de(»cription of po^ts sprang Out of mod^rit 
nefinecnent. Dr. Daawin^ witli his ^^gossii«- 
mery lioeei;'' bis repulnive personif^cflitiofis ; his 
gorgeous ornaments ; and. bis phik>sopbio gravity^ 
rendered bis *' Loves of the Plants/' more absurd 
^d kss. attractive than Ovid's Metamorphosesi 
He was pvatsed and idolized by those sensitive 
souls whose n^ves were bric^d to a perfect uni'* 
Son with bis melting melody ; bat the poet and 
his admifers, unfortunately for themselves, sunk 
to the inevital^e bblivion of dullness and false 
taste. Another description of rhymstenrobtaioed 
a t^pporary patronage. The Delia Crusca tribe 
of afiectation and rant, for a white abused the 
publici ear; and these sonorous witling were 
slucceeded by the exqukite votaries of simplidty, 
who came forward with their claims to populat 
admiration. Among these, Southry, CoIiE- 
Rii>ofi, Wordsworth, Campbri.1*, and even 
THfiirWAiiii and MonTgombry, claimed the 
meed of siniple poetry : and simple indeedit was** 
But^UTHRY^ undeterred by his failute aa ar 
simple son of the muses, aspired to be sulblinieu 
It bad long boea aoloiK^wledged thtt we oouid 
only. boa(rt of r one opicpoei; but tbe^paltriotifi 
Robert Soutbey resolved that we ^Aiould have; 
two; and lest hb fii*st beroie effort should bol 
be sufitoie«t .tb subataiitiate his daiawli k^ la*. 
vouk*ed like worid with aia^dond and a ikf rd pfkti-' 



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348 THB EMGUSH MBTROPOIiTS; 

rative in blank verse. Other performers on the 
]jre, like the ancient competitors for the, crown 
at the Olympic Games, also aspired to the fame 
of epic bards, and in this age, so prolific of me- 
morable events, and rapid improvements in all 
the arts, we can enumerate three epic poems 
Irom the pen of Southby ; one by Pyjb ; one by 
CuMBKRLAKB ; and one by Cottlb ; besides^ 
three epic ballads by the indefatigable Scott! 
A severe critic may indeed exclaim : " You can- 
not with propriety call those rhapsodies epic 
poems ; compared with the Paradise Lost, they 
vanish like stars on the approach of solar light.'^ 
This may be true ; but no liberal critic will ex* 
pect impossibilities. These gentlemen all mi»- 
took their talent when they touched the lyre of 
Apollo. 

While our poetry has thus descended into the 
regions of absurdity, and the Bathos,, with tl>e ex- 
ertion of Cowper's Task, vnhich rises among 
modern verse like an oak surrounded by under- 
wood, the art of novel and romance- writing has 
been brought 16 a degree (^ perfection, to which 
RiCHABi>soN and Pibi^dimG' were strahgerd. 
Indeed, so rapid iias been the production of 
Bovelsy and so strong the similarity c^ character 
aiid incMlents, that with the merd Variation of 
namesi the majority of them might be supposed< 
Iba bav€ been prepared for the press by the aid of 



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OR, I.ONBON IK 1820. 340 

a copying-machine. The inferiority of those 
productions^ however, has contributed to, that 
.superficial flippancy, and assuming impertinence^ 
80 perceptible in the world ; and vJce, mingled 
with absurdity, was introduced about twenty 
years ago by the translation of Grerman romances 
and plays. These extravagant productions of a 
wild and vitiated imaginationt gave a new direc- 
tion to the current of popular taste. Nothing.bnt 
^ined castles, the rendesvous of banditti, or aiipt- 
posed abode of spectres, could be endured ; and 
after the nerves of our wives amd (knghlKHrs had 
been sufficiently agonized by those monatroui 
productioni of foreign intellect, a few of our 
own worthies took up the pen to assert the 
honour of Biitish absurdity. Among these pa* 
triotic scribes, the celebrated Anne Radcuffe, 
was pre«emident. By her detailed descriptkxis 
of phaatooiui that filled her phrenetic imagina^ 
tion, landscapes that never met the human eye^ 
and woods and rooks Uiat never appeared in 
picturesque wildness on the summit of the mtf 
precipice, and her animated sketches of Italian 
assassins, half-consuined corpjses, pictaifes;^ver<» 
hung with crape, ds^gers encrusted with bloodf 
and chains fastened to rocks in subterranean 
darkness; this enchantress conjured up a host of 
horrors, whidi (revisited the reader in tarrifio 
dreams^ and altogether formed such a oombt«# 



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950 THE SNOUSI^ HBTROPOIiIS ; 

nation of absurdities as migbt be expected to 
emanate from the mind of a writer who was after- 
wards the inmate of a mad-house. Anns Riiy- 
CUFFE, however, neglected to give her novels 
that tincture of sensuality requisite for the grati- 
fication of certain readers; but a kind genius 
took up the pen to supply that deficiency, and in 
his Monk, presented all the seductive abomina- 
tions which an inflamed imagination, a cdrrupt 
heart, and a mind devoted to demonology, could 
; bestow. That the hideous romances of this 
EnglbA seosualirt, and the immoral dramatic 
pieces of Kotzebue, and Schii«i#cr, have viti- 
ated thousands among the. higher classes of so- 
ciety, is evident from the frequent trials for adaU 
tery, which from time to time disgraced our 
Courts of Justice. The pernicious inflmende of 
ribaldry and profaneness is now somewhat di*> 
minished ; one of the promoters of aidttltery has 
Itfsumed a more dignified character; und the 
vicious votaries of sensoality will not, it is to be 
hoped^ again be able to boast of the example of 
m great debauchee^ in vindication of their debase 
ing* Mmntts. Socli'are some of the most dan- 
gerous 6frms arising from the abpse of the pen, 
and' Ihe pdess, in this free country ; batmaakind^ 
thaugft hmnto error, have also an inherent pre« 
diiipeaitiM to virtue. The present time afibrds 
the aaimatRig prospect of an amelioration of 



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OR, LONDON IN 1820. 251 

morals by a geueral dissemiDatioa of the.prin* 
ciples of trotby tbroagh tbe medium of that gift 
of divine mercy, tbe Bible ; and under tbe pro«- 
tection of Providence, we may expect a gradnial 
and durable improyement of public mianners, 
and tbe consequent disappearance of levity and 
impiety, in a community wbere that sacred anti«> 
dote to infidelity, and vice, is in general ckcfila^ 
tion. On this subject, tbe highest flights of 
eloqtience, would not be hyperbolical; nor ooald 
the utmost aspirations of genius completely de^ 
scribe the celestial felicity conferred by the 
CHRISTIAN RBUGiON on mankind emancipated 
from the bondage of vice. Tbe Bible is indeed 
the harbinger of, divine philanthropy, which at 
once reveals the promise of future bliss, affords 
an antepast of endless happiness, and presents 
the cap of immortality to the tremblings and 
thirsty lips of devout and grateful human beings^ 
With the more extensive circulation of the 
Scriptures^ a considerable £dKng off in the pro* 
duction of novels is at present perceptiUe. The 
public mind seems satiated with a repetition of 
duU novels, published in many volmnes at m 
exorbitant price« A spurious kind of moral pro- 
duction has, indeed, been manufactured by ^' ready 
writers,^^ for the accommodation of polite reli« 
giottists, UBfeder the titlea of ^* Ceilebs in fS^funk 
of a. Wife;' 'VSitdf Control' '' Discipline/' iuk 



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^52 TB£ ENGLISH METROPOLIS; 

and these purified amatory pieces, are actually 
admitted into the bouses of strict moralists, who 
are deceived by the specious semblance of 
virtue. 

Such is the general state of English literature, 
which at this moment is so, various, multifarious, 
and extensive, that it would require the applica- 
tion of many years to examine the modem pro- 
ductions of the press. Indeed, so re-productiv6 
are those compilers who increase or diminish the 
works of authors to the size required by their 
employers the Publishers, that they may be com- 
pared to thistles, and other pernicious plants, 
which scatter their seeds around, and occupy the 
soil in which something truly valuable might have 
been brought to perfection. The warehouses of 
the dealers in printed paper may be compared to 
^^a rank and unweeded garden," where valu- 
aUe and useless productions of the same soil 
spring up together; the one affording whole- 
some nutriment, the other diffosing pestilential 
effluvia around. 

We can, indeed, boast of a few living authors, 
whose works will delight and instruct posterity. 
Far be it from the candid satirist to indulge, for 
a moment, the unfounded prejudice which would 
exalt the merit of our ancestors by the deprecia- 
tion of contemporary genius ; at the same time it 
must beacknowledge4 with regret, that our most 



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OR, loxbOn in 1820. ^5» 

estimablet are not always oar most popular wri- 
ters. Those authors who stoop to amuse the 
giddy throngs at the expense of their moral prio- 
ciples, are too often successful ; but sterling meri^ 
will survive such worthless and temporary pro«* 
doctions, as the ever-green flourishes in perennial 
beauty amid th^ decays of surrounding veg^ta-* 
tion. Let not a passion for fame tempt the man 
of genius from the path of rectitude into the wild 
regions of licentious imagination. The task of 
an author is the most important imaginable ; it 
is his duty to anaeliorate the morals of society ; 
but errors disseminated by his seductive elo- 
quence, may deprave thousands of intelligent 
beingi^ ! Let him also reflect, that his most secret 
studies are open to the eye of an omnipresent 
Creator, to whom he must be accountable for the 
use he makes of his talents. Under this awful 
impression, he will devote his mental powers to 
virtue, and endeavour to the utmost of his abili- 
ties to instruct the reader. 

The novels of Richardson, Fielding, Smollett, 
Goldsmith, delighted their contemporaries by 
faithful descriptions of nature, and exact exhibi- 
tions of character; and they still amuse. In 
imitation of those masterly romancers a host ^ 
inferior writers appeared, and 

*' Corresponding misses filled the ream. 
With s«ntimdDtal frippery and dream." 



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254 THB ENGLISH MIBTROPCXLIS ; 

But the works of tbese ephemera have loiig^ 
h/een removed from the aheheSf and another race 
of novelists exerted their abilities to charm and 
astonish young ladies and gentlemen* That 
affectation of refined sentiment uttered in the 
silly phraseology, supposed by those sapient 
writers to be the perfection of fashionable con* 
versation, was both ludicrous and nonsensical. 
Even Miss Edgevrorth*s Tales of Fiishionable 
Lifet are in some instances liable to this* censure. 
What opportunity had this recluse ^tnster,. or 
the still more refined old maid. Miss More^ to 
make observations on persons of quality, except 
at the public theatre ? Yet such censorioas gos^^ 
sipping as fills their pages, has long been esti- 
mated <by the ignorant reader as faithful sketches 
of characters and manners. 

Another class of novel-writers, without the 
abilities of Mrs. D'Arblay, Miss More, or Misa 
Bdgeworthj certain esquires, knights of the p^ 
and ladies who have been abandoned by their 
proteetorSf sit down and compose such, a farrago 
of scandal and falsehood as *^ The Spirit of the 
Book;' *^ The private History of the Court of 
England," and similar literary forgeric^for miere 
emolument, and written in a style which seta 
criticism at defiance. If such writers, were %o 
become English classics, we should sooa degene- 
rate into the bar barisn^ of the fifteenth eentury ; 



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om, i.ON3>aK IN^ISSO. 355 

bat hapf>ily for the honour of oar country, its 
language is too firmly established to yield to any 
innovation ; mch productions are the mere 
bubbles of literature, and like bubbles, they dis^ 
appear successively, while the true imitations of 
nature and passion remain. 

Yet let us not be too confident of the stability 
of our exoellent language, for at this moment its 
purity is menaced by no common attempt to re- 
introduee valgarity among os. In books, as in 
dress, and furniture, that capricious goddes^ 
Fashion, from time to time assumes the authority 
of an arbitress, and her dictates are obeyed by 
the passive, the giddy, and the gay. Novelty 
ever charms the crowd, and whoever can pro- 
dbce something new, strange, and tutoommon, 
may anticipate temporary sticcess. Thos the 
metrical Tales of Walter Scott produced a rich 
harvest to the author and publisher, and the ro» 
tnancea of an anonymous Scot, have since be- 
witched tbe<)ft4de folks of England, to a degree- 
of frenzy unequalled even by that absurd rage 
for German novels and plays, which inflamed the 
imag^natioa cf thousands in London, in the be^ 
ginning of the present century. Nothing less 
than the blaspkemoos execrations of continental 
bfluiditt], and atheistical villains, could satisfy the 
lovera d* sabbme composition then; and it ap- 
j^fan^ jfhat nothing but the ooarse manners, 



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aaS THir ENGLISH MBnrROPOUS; 

savage ferocity, disgusting amodrs, and insane 
Varing of Caledonian fanatics, and lunatics, can 
please now. Even the public theatre resounds 
the melodious names of Donocha Dha, Uumbvi- 
dikes, Madge Wildfire, and Macgregor; and 
sober citizens, with their wives and daughtcfrsi 
eagerly peruse the adventures of profligates, 
Border robbers, and Scotch beldams,' in the 
drawing room j or hasten to behold the repre- 
sentation of those interesting personages on the 
stage, where, happily for the morak of the audi* 
tory, the characteristic sentiments of knaves, and 
fools, are mostly delivered in a dialect which re* 
quires the aid of a glossary. 

By adroit management those northern bub- 
bles have been kept afloat for several months, 
to the great emolument of the authors and pub- 
lishers. The authors, for it cannot be supposed 
diat such exquisite productions of genius ema- 
nate from a single mind, have hitherto, like oQr 
literary reviewers, worked unseen, and as dark- 
ness is one source of sublime emotion, obscurity 
renders their romances doubly valuable. Va- 
rious modes of puffing have been resorted to for 
the excitement of public curiosity, and to effect 
the transfer of the aurum tangible from English 
into Scottish cofiers. Sometimes Walter Scott 
IS the reputed ;9tuthor, then the son of a Scotck 
Baronet, whose honourable parent wAl not let; 



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on, LQNBON IN 1820. 25'^ 

him publish his name as a romancer, is reputed 
to be the enviable favourite ; but the probability 
is, that those .novels and tales are the ofFspfing 
of the brains of several money-loving Scotch- 
men, including those original geniuses, the 
Edinburgh Reviewers. Hence, the suc- 
cess of Caledonian Romances is almost certain, 
for the publishers have two strings to their bow; 
first, an unequalled production of genius, the 
.principal beauties of which are concealed in 
language as unintelligible as the prophetic re- 
sponses of the ancient oracle ^t Delphos, and 
afterwards, the advantage of a favourable review 
by a friend to the firm. 

Like our successful tragedian?, those authors 
have profited by the influence over the mind of 
the reader, obtainable by a,>ma8terly develop- 
ment of the violent passions of human nature. 
Hence, delight and terror are alternately ex-^ 
cited, and the attention captivated by those cele- 
brated narratives. They have also chosen a 
remote period for th.e fable, the incidents of 
which are narrated in a dialect, the obscurity 
and barbarism of which places it beyond the 
grasp of English criticism. Indeed, these inge- 
nious novelists may be compared to alchymists, 
who have discovered that iong-sought-for dest-^ 
deratumj the philosopher's stone, by which Cale- 
donian hra$9 is transmuted into English goldy 

B 



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S^8 THE ENGI.1S0 METROPOLIS; 

and while they dance in a circle round their 
crucible, like the witches in Macbeth round the 
cauldron, they niay triumphantly exclaim, in the 
words of a French proverb, 

" Tutile secret que de mentir apropos/' 

The success of ingenious Scotchmen in the 
art of novel and romance writing, has given 
them a decisive pre-eminence in a species o£ 
composition to which they heretofore had no 
^laim., The celebrity of the Scottish nation in 
various branches of jK^ience and the usefnl arUi, 
has, indeed, been great for ages. Ju medicine, 
surgery, criticism, and compilation, or book- 
nMKin^y the phUosoph^s and literati oi the 
northern division of our island have \mg ob* 
tiiined distinction. Nor have their improve- 
ments in agriculture been trivial; and af for 
hprticultmre, a Scotch gardener is alu^o$t a9 com- 
i9on asr a Scotch piper. Even tlie produce of 
^e £nglisb corn field often undergoes the skilr 
ful wamud o^ration of a Caledoi^ bakei% 
before it is ftt for the nice patete of an English 
bdy. . 

In m^ern, or ratker ephemeral literature^ 
they evidently aqwe te^ kf ^h^ nii^iifipoliste ef 
genius, and even i^ ]?^f«l9le. the pvicm of A» 
bookrusarket. 1^ vhat otiwr f^i^ of tii^ Imh 
tory of SrUisb, fio* it ^msifA be cejiailk^lkk 

2 



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OR, I^OKBON UT 1820. 260 

liftirature, were eight shillingfi demaiided for a 
volume in twelves, written in a jargpon which 
feqnired the elucidatidns of a glossary or lesticon 
to eoahle the coaamon reader to nnderstdnd it? 
Bat such k the charm of novelty^ and socb the 
imposing inflQeiice of genuine iaspudenee cool- 
bioed with ingenciily, that the valgansmsr of the 
semi*fcarbariaiis of formef ages, have ptevailed 

, for a time over the reBned language of Addison, 
Pope, and Johnson, and every pretty lisping^ 
miss, and every fashionable coxcomb, must run 
the risk of suffocation by pronotiDcing W6rds of 

' Gaelic etymology, while the drawings-room re«- 
echoes the sonorous a»4 guttural phraseology of 
the wild mountaineer, instead of the elegant 
language of Rousseau^ ov the more mfosical verses 
of Petrarch. 

Daring the influence of this new species of 
eottipcMition, the progress of correct attioilatioii 
is not only prevented in fbglaad, but eve» the 
Scotch themselves, who were actjuwing a pk»s^ 
tng faciKty in the pronum^iMion of whaift may 
now be termed tlve obsolete EfigKsb langtrapge, 
are' ol^ed to* Dwa with m sHly kiiid^ of approba- 
tmn to the stody of '' Qttkt Kkke on the Greew,- ' 
^ The Ciierrie and the Slae,^ and stmilai; pro- 
ductions of the Scottish niiise'. In^ fa^ Uti&iA 
sBiiff and JBcottlsk phvaseoUigyr bid^ laii^ «^ ex- 
tinguii^ the pMMoa ibr rappoe aini Fyetveh, MV 

b2 



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260 TH^ ENGLISH METROPOLIS; . 

does it seem unreasouable, that after the nice 
noses in high-life have been tickled with pungent 
snishin, the fine, ears of the polite world should 
be harmonized in perfect unison by such melli- 
fluent and enchanting phrases, as, '* And so the 
auld carle," said Madge, ^' 1 wish ye had seen 
him stoiting about, aff ae leg on to . the other, 
.wi* a kind o' dot-and-go-one sort o' motion, as 
if ilk ane o* his twa legs had belanged to sindry 
folk." 

But this short extract is not sufficient to illus- 
trate the energy, significance, and propriety of 
the present fashionable Scottish dialect^ it may 
therefore be proper to quote the following dia- 
logue, which may serve as a model of polite 
courtship, worthy of the imitation not only of 
our cocknies, but even persons of quality. 

Suddenly changing his tone, he resolutely said, 
— *f< Jeanie, I will make ye Lady Dumbiedikes 
afore the sun sets, and ye may ride to Lunnon in 
your ain coach if ye like." 

f*Na, Laird, that can netver be— my fath^r^s 
grief — ^roy si^iter's sitpntion— -the discredit to you." 
r " That's wy business," said IHimbiedikes, "ye 
wa.d say naetbing about jthat if ye were na a fule 
— ^yeti Llike ye the better forH — ae wise body's 
aneugb in tbei married i^tate.? . : 

" But, Laird," said Jeanie, " I Jike another 
man better, than yoiu, and I canna macry ye/^ 



I 



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OR, I-ONDON IN 1820. 261 

" Another man better than me, Jeanie ?'' sai4 
Dumbiedikes — " how is that possible ? — It's no 
possible, woman — ye hae kenn'd me sae lang/' 

" Ay but, Laird," said Jeanie, with persever- 
ing simplic^ity, " I kenn'd him langer." 

But as the admirers of romance seem almost 
satiated with such wretched gibberish, the Edin- 
burgh junto, ever solicitous to obtain praise and 
pelf, have recently cultivated a new field of ima- 
gination. IyANHO£ is the fii^t fruits of their 
ingenuity, and for this Tale, in three pocket 
volumes, they have the conscience to demand 
thirty shillings! Hence, it appears, that the li- 
terary merchandise imported from the northern 
side of the Tweed, rises regularly in proportion 
to the folly of purchasers, and the price may in 
time, like the national debt, become so high that 
it cannot be paid. But as indefatigable perse- 
veranpe in the acquisition of money, seems to be 
the grand characteristic of those northern en- 
lighteners, they may, when they have produced a 
series of Anglo-Saxon Tales, turn their attention 
to the stage, and instruct and delight the people 
of England by an unequalled ^m^s^^ of Tragedies, 
Comedies, and Farces. As for their capacity, 
can any man doubt it, who recollects that they 
possess in a pre-eminent degree, one great re* 
quisite of popular composition, 



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S02 THB BNGUSH MJSTBOPOL1S ; 

^ '' He trho hath but imptidencfi 

To all things hath a fair pretence." 

Thus, even the egotism and vanity of Byron 
in poetry, and Cobbett in politics, have been ex- 
ceeded by the bold pretensions of the present 
junta of Scottish poets, romancers, and re- 
viewers. 

Among various reports respecting the ingeni- 
ous authors of the novels and tales, produced in 
the book-manufactory of Edinburgh, it is now 
confidently asserted by persons who profess to 
be favoured with the secret, that a Mrs. Wilson, 
sister to the last minstrel of Scotia, is the prin- 
cipal writer. This account is probable, and as 
the bard and romancer is a critic, and perhaps, 
even one of that constellation of dissectors, who 
may be termed the literary gas-lights of Auld 
Reekie, his brother censors can^ occasionally 
lend him a hand in the composition of those 
amusing narratives, published so regularly to 
gratify the opulent people of England. The 
boasted liberality of their publishers, however, is 
very questionable, except indeed, the thousands 
of pounds said to have been paid for the copy- 
right of those popular works, are pounds Scots, 
or one twelfth of the nominal value in English 
money. Hence, the seventy thousand pounds 
said to have been, acquired by a itnccessful 



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OK, LONPON IN 1820. 263 

Scotch versifier, dwindles down to less than six 
tUousand pounds sterling, a sum which Pope 
realized by bis trandation of the Iliad. 



THE OLB BOOK TRAIlE. 

A passion for the obsolete produi^ions of aa« 
thors long since fo^gotton, or selcbm named^ 
having lately infected the brfetiiis of a few of our 
nobiUty and gentry ^ with whom the price of a 
hobby-horse was a secondary consideration, cei'-> 
tain poblisherb in this aietropolis^ who like tailoni 
and millikevs, always catch at the first hiiit of 
any thing iienf and wnmmmonj quickly p'oduced 
fill ^ dusty and mwty foKos, quartos, octavos^ 
and ^lockdmos, oS the fifteenth, sixteenth, and 
seventeenth centuries^ whieh they cotild collect 
in the pUr€ recesses of their warehouses, and" 
having furbished up tiie itiuminaied pag^s^ ab4 
brushed the covers of those literary cdskets^ most 
generously invited the learned dnd great men of 
the realm to come and feast, but '^ not mth&ut 
monet/f' at their literary banquet. Whether the 
bait w\h attract the gndyeoM q( black letter , 
r^maias to be seen > possibly^ during a lucid in* 
tervaU those book-^ders mAy diijcover, that it 
wtek) be more f^rais^worUby to endow a school' 
fortlM education of the eibklrea of thi^ir terlantry, 
thm t0 pay one oar tn^ ibeosand pounds for th« 



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264 THE ENGLISH METROPOLIS; 

worthless and illegible production of a departed 
scribbler. The sober-minded friend of literature 
must, indeed^ smile at the foolish competitions of 
black letter amateurs, when he is informed that 
an English nobleman paid upwards of two thou- 
sand pounds for the Decameron of Boccacio ! 

. But it is by the extravagance of such ninnies 
that tradesmen live ; and those booksellers- who 
are now so active for the accommodation of the 
excellent critics of the puerile madrigals, the 
absurd tales,- and the obscene nai'rattv€s of the 
balf4augbt bards, who amused James the First 
and Ch;;irles the Second with their ribaldry, may 
well be termed the remrreetion^men^ of antiquated 
literature. They never disentomb the dead^ or 
rummage the depths of obscurity for* the remains 
of unestablished genius, without the hope of re- 
ward ; the subject, whether disseqted or em- 
balmed, is received as a treasure by the amateur 
of worm-eaten pages, and the publisher and pur- 

. chaser are mutually gratified. 

Indeed, all the arts of puffing are resorted to 
without scruple by certaiin publishers, who emu- 
late empirical quacks aiKi the venders of lottery^ 
tickets, in the inveption of attractive falsehood. 
By practice, (bey have acquired a readiness at 
enihelUshment, insomuch that they may fairly 
cjaim the palm for successful imposition; If the 
lott^r^Mtkrki^tf i^ender .stifiMilates^varic^, by pro- 



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OR, LONDON IN 1820. 265 

claiming' that his office is the true and only 
Temple of Fortune ; and the quack revives the 
hope of the dying-, by professing^ to work mi- 
racles, the publisher is no less snccessftil in ex*- 
citing" curiosity, and profiting by the credulity of 
his honie^t fellovi^-citizeTis. 

The common trick of dividing one impression 
of a work into several editions j has been so long; 
practised by publishers, that like a habit of 
swearing* or lying, the turpitude of the deception 
excites no remorse. In the art of printing-, the 
word token is a technical term for two hundred 
and fifty sheets, of course the first two hundred 
and fifty copies of the impression may be termed 
the^^^ edition, the second token, the secmd 
edition^ Slo. By this easy expedient, an impres* 
sion of one thousand copies^ will, by a dexterous 
alteratbn made by the compositor in the title* 
page, appear to l^avie pa.<^$ed through f&ur edi- 
tions ; and that such is the comnaon practice of 
some adepts in the trade of publishing, need mrt 
be doubted. One company of pubiii^hers, and a 
long-tailed (^ompany too^ has recently published 
an ' annual work as a sixteenth edition ! How 
many editions has Moore's Almanack passed 
through, according to this mode of calculation ? 

•From tbe'fik'egoing observationt^, the reviewers 
are g^herally the satiHsiSy and pubUshers^ the 
jffonifBffyHst^^ of modem authors. In some instiiiices 



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a06 THE ENGLISH METROPOLIS; 

indeed, the reviewer humanely lends bis aid 
ta the puhlisber, to preserve the bantling df soiU^ 
addle-pate, and to recommend it to the pnblic 
till the sale has realized the expence of p«p«r, 
printing, and advertisements, including pufis; 
and thus, like an indifferent dramatic pteccf, 
which languishes through its nine probationary 
nighto and then expires, many a, heavy and 
worthless volume is palmed on the liberal ere* 
didity of the public, by the secret conclave of 
publishers and compilers. 

AEVlEWfiRS. 

In a free eoumtry like England^ where the iil'» 
faabttmits are remarkable for good sense, and 
averse to every mode of oppression, literary Re<* 
viewers are the only description of secret inqoi* 
sitors tolerated and encouraged. How shall we 
^aceount for thifl singular deviation from the ge<* 
aeral manlineflls and candour of the English oha* 
racter? Have the critics, under the specious 
fH^tett of improving ^uUk taste, gradually es« 
labliihed a tribunal as airbitrary asevei* disgraced 
4 despotic govermnefit? And has tberepuUic 
of letters, with all its pretensions to freedclm, ben 
eeme enthralled by the arts of a few oatioing md 
avaricioM pnblisbers aod disappointed autlioft } 
I>oes the inAueiice of RevieWws^ depend ofiMi 



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Oltif LONDON IK 1820. S67 

the indolence of their admirers ; or is it supported 
by their own g^enuine merit ? Perhaps all these 

^ c^mses jCombine with the general pre«4«spositioii 
of iQankind to indul^^e in censure; and hence, ati 
author is dissected for the amusemei^t of the 
poblic. 

The present dei^tism of £n^li>;h Reviewers 
has been the work of time» At the ftrst esta« 
bltshment of our most popular literary Jou^al, 
the Monthly^ Review, little more was attempted 
by the critics connected with that pul)lication| 
than a few strictures on the article reviewed, 
with illustrative extracts. The exercise of utii^f 
, authorized power assumed by ationymous cenmirfi^ 
for the regulation of the republic of lettersi 

. was circumscribed by that constitutional liberty 
of the press, enjoyed by a fre6 people j and it 
was not till after the lapse of several yearft, tbM 
the Reviewers exerted their executive aotho- 
rity, and put the law of criticism in ^ce Ugaimt 
literary delinquents. Still, however, their deci-> 
sions and decrees were tolerable, and evidently 
founded on the principles of our political cfonsti-^ 
tution, with this important differem^ey that the 
culprit was not permitted to confront bis accusers 
at their bar» according to the practice of the 
ancient Romans, and modern Britons. The 
Reviewers, with the promptitude of despotic wa^ 
thority, at ouj^ acquitted or coademnedl tb# 



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268 THE ENGLISH METROPOLIS; 

author ; and from their tribunal there wa$ bo 
apfyeal; for the public opinion was in a great 
degree influenced by their decisions respecting 
literature. 

That the first Reviewers were actuated by the 
patriotic desire 16 refine the national taste, and 
regulate the eccentricities of genius, will not be 
denied by the judicious reader of their periodical 
works ; and the Monthly Review afibrds the most 
valuable and interesting History of English and 
f'oreign literature for more than half a century. 
The young author will in its pages meet with 
numerous precepts and illustrations respecting 
composition, which may aid him. in his progress; 
while the occasional censure of defective know- 
ledge, bad^ taste, inelegant diction, and vulgar 
barbarism, may prevent hiqi from falling into 
similar errors. 

The success of the Monthly Reviewers incited 
other lidyenturers to , exercise their censorious 
powers. The Critical Review now made its ap- 
pearance ; and under the influence of the malig- 
nant, but vigorous, genius of Smollett, it also 
obtained a considerable share of popularity; 
and as a strenuous and successful defender of 
morality and corrector of taste, this Journal has, 
for half a century, been equally respectable and 
elegant. The strictures of its conductors, have, 
indeed, been of u graver cast than Uiose of the 



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ORj IX>NIK>N IN 1820, 269 

MontHly Review^ which it seems to excel in 
metaphysical disquisition. Alarmed by the 
severe animadversions of this Review on the 
works of others, many a young author has paused 
in his progress towards absurdity ; and by turn-^ 
ing into the path of propriety, smoothed by cri- 
ticism,: he eventually arrived at the temple of 
Fame, which would have been inaccessible by 
any other road. By mismanagement, or from 
some accidental cause, this Review for a few 
years passed into the hands of different pro- 
prietors,, and lost much of its for\ner consistency 
of principle, and, consequently, of its influence. 
Whether it will ever regain its former reputation 
for fair and manly criticism, is doubtful. 

With the increase of books and readers, the num- 
ber of literary censors also increased ; the British 
Critic appeared as a candidate for popular ap* 
probation, and by the defence of orthodoxy and 
loyalty obtained the patronage of the supporters of 
church and state. This Review has for several 
years been a suceessftil opponent to religious 
and political theorists, who vainly or madly en- 
deavoured to subvert the laws or the souls of 
their fellow-citizens. 

Another advocate for existing establishments 
has also appeared, under the singular title of the 
Anti-Jacobin Reriew, or Churchman's Maga- 
zine ; hence, impartiality cannot be expected ioi 



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S70 THE KNGU5B MBTBOPOUS ; 

the critical decisions, published in a work avow- 
edly under the influence of party spirit. 

On a candid investigatioa of the advantoget 
derivable from most of our Kterary Reviews^ we 
shall probably discover, that they are often defi* 
cient in that critical discernment^ and superiority 
of taste and knowledge, to which their autbots 
make such bold pretensions. One of these 
anonymous inquisitors of the Muses has adopted 
the imposing appellation of TAc Ecketic Rernern^ 
Hence, .whatever proceeds from its pure recesset^ 
must be good; or, at least, select.. Even the 
Printer^s Devil must wash his hands before he 
can venture to touch the immaculate s^eeta of the > 
Eclectic Review. Away with aueb preposterous 
affectation of super^u* purity 1 Suppose that a 
&w revermid gentleoften have availed thenselv^ 
of the aid of that masked battery ht the annoy* 
ance of their, opponents, are the people to be 
Ciajoled by those pretenders to pecttKar excel*- 
)ence in morak and religion? Let them^come 
forward, like men, and avow their sentiment^ 
instead of resorting to the cocnmoo ttiok of 
anonymousi criticism, for the exposure of Uieir 
enemies. Truth requires not the aid of any 
UteriMry censor ; not even, of that of tlH>S($ north- 
ern Ifghte, the Edinburgh Reviewers. 

The EfUnburgJ^ Review is n#w indeed sd faurly^ 
established by, the^ swnd jfsii^ff^aat wd caadid 



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0«, MaCDON IN 1830. «71 

criticism of its conduetcMrs, u far aa respects 
mere literary a>mpoi»]tiont that it is entitled U> 
particular atte^ition. This quarterly paUicatioa 
was begun about sixteeu years ago, by several 
men of taste, resident ia or near the Scottidi 
metropolis} but, wbateirer may be their metit 
m critics, they are ceoswable for the levity witb 
which they ocoasionally expatiate on subjects 
oeniieGted with theology. They asem eager to 
display their independcaiGe, by that high iim» of 
philosopby which is so pleasing to bmian pride, 
and is aa ce«n{detdy homogenedi with the phti0* 
m^plmme of the French school, and the metaphyf 
sical chimeras of the German philoaopber, ISjkiRit. 
As sound and. manly critics on pdite literatiure^ 
they are inferior to none ; and their m»rtecly 
disquisitions and dlassieal development of the 
principles of literary taste, are adorned with tba 
beauties of an animated and perspicuous style^, 
la a few instances they have suffered themselves 
to be influenced by a partiality to Scotch writers^ 
which they have goodnnaluredly and candidly 
acknowledged. It ia to the ereiit of the Sd»* 
burgh Reviewers, that they seldom have tie- 
graded their character by sarcastic strictures On 
the productions of their contemporaries, particu- 
larly the first essay of an inexperienced author. 
Their great, and it appears their habitual error, 
is that partiality to infidel philosophy, manifested 



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274 THE ENOLTSH BIISTROPOLIS ; 

by the avidity with which they review and i com* 
mend the productions of fancifol French theoristi^ 
who delight in controverting the troth of Divine 
Revelation, They might by this time have been 
taught a little discretion by the fallibility of their 
political prophecies. They may arrogate to 
themselves all the attributes of the Muses ; but 
the oracle of Scotia is not a sufficient substitute 
for that of Delphos. Born and ediicated as those 
iUaminati have been in the far-famed regions of 
second-sight, they are only- purblind seers when 
they peer mto futurity ; and so erroneous have 
been their prognostications respecting the things 
of this world, that they deserve no credit for their 
vain efforts to shake the faith of the believers in 
Christianity. The doctrines of Revelation have 
withstood the vanity and levity of French wits, 
and German philosophers ; and will continue to 
rectify the morals, and animate the hopes of 
innumerable millions of Christians, when the 
most elegant and nervous productions of modem 
literary genius, and among others, the works o^ 
the Edinburgh Reviewers, shall be forgotten. ' 



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OR, roN0ON IN 18f0. 273 



-—To hold w 'twere the mirror up to Nature ; to shew Vir- 
tue her own feature ; Scorp, her own image ; and the very age 
and body of the Time, his form and pressure. — Shakspearb. 

Among^ the mimeroiis advaDtages bestowed . on 
civilized nations by the art of. printings 'New$» 
papers bave longfoitned an excellent medium of 
mriversal intelU^enoa Before the establidraient 
of tbese paper Mercuries; the getf erality of maa^ 
kind continued in a state of ignorance respecting 
each otber» and the globe which: they inbabitedi 
except the vagoe knowledge commnnieated by 
the imperfect aoeounta of travellers^ 

That. we may^ \» able to formsome idemofithe 
indispensable utility^ of newspapers^ letus^oMly 
consider the^ rapidity^ of < tbeir cnroalation ; their 
nsefiili connminieatieiM' respeotiogf commerce; 
poUtics; newdiscotrieries in tUeaits^^amdi sciences^ 
inprnvemeots inagricidtiire; aud adi^ertisemetitt 
pfi new publicationi^ Id - this^pointiof) view, thej 
may be said to i conv^ informntibn conducive to 
theLiveU4)eipg? of the-soeial body> as the blood 
cireulateftTthi'oiigfafthe animal fbrtbe-invigoratim 
of^Ui'meubers^ 

Adv0rtMi€uietit8<€8i.diffi9r«aiti subfects mt only 
amuiebiftinstratl^heireadem but in thin respect, 
itnustabeiaoknowiedgec^ .tfant ^matiy^ of our ^ psb^ 



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274 THE ENGLISH METBOPOLIS; 

He prints disseminate pernicious intelligence. 
Fdse attestations in favour of nostrums, some- 
times disgrace their columns} and the modesty 
of the reader is not unfrequently insulted by the ap- 
pearance of advertisementsyby which assignations 
and intrigues are carried on under fictitious names. 
This is the more reprehensible, as^ we often, in 
the next column, find a spirited and well-timed 
satire on some recent immoral transaction. 

Thus, like every other human institution, our 
public prints are tinctured with imperfection, 
though of general utility ; as the same fertile soil 
is at once productive of nutritious grain and poi- 
sonous plants. Till the legislature shall de^m it 
proper to suppress quackery, the editors of our 
journals will accept money from empirics, ibr the 
publication of their advertisements. 

Our newspapers exhibit a lively and interest- 
ing view of the. busy and the gay world; nor are 
the ridiculous freaks of faslnon overlooked bjf 
tiews-writers. The foibles of tti^ vain ami the 
great are comnionly too light to be corrected by 
serious admonitions from the pulpit, and too eva- 
nescent to allow the satirist time to attad^ them . 
in a volume; but bur ephemeral censors, like 
eagles on the wing, instantly perceive and purisue 
their prey, n^hidi is seldom able to elude or sur- 
vive their grasp. A fiew^paper is indeed a trer 
niiendous inquisitorial iu^trufm tot; tod the mmi 



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OR, LONlM)N IN 1820. 275 

abandoned character, in hi^h life, would tremble 
at the idea of being poblicly exposed through its 
magnifying medium. By it we obtain general 
ideas of the state of the civilized world; and in- 
telligence of affecting incidents which exhibit 
new views of human nature ; and the perpetual 
vicissitudes of the nations of the earth. 

Newspapers are confessedly the best vehicles 
of political information; and, as such, will ever 
be highly prized in all free countries. Their 
suppression might therefore be considered as a 
preliminary step towards clespotism ; for it is a 
i;^ell-aiithenticated fact, that among those un- 
happy nations subjugated by tyranny, newspa- 
pers are either unknown, or those in circulation 
are under the influence of the governraeut. 

In free countries, the case is happily difl^rent. 
Here newspapers become important, and of ge- 
neral utility. The report of the day may some^ 
times be artfully raised by stock-jobbers, and even 
the defamation of individuals may defile the pre^; 
but such rumours and slanders are soon super- 
seded by the authoritative investigation of truth. 
^ !Wboevar suspects that newspapers are not the 
bestre^sters of facts relative to the progress of 
citilizatioii, arts, and sciences^ would do well to 
inquire* whence tlie materials of our annals are 
fopfriied, wbith furnish the historian with a regu- 
kr^ iieries of intoresttng facti;, arranged in chron^ 

82 



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276 THH EKGUSH MUTROBOIitS ; 

l^eal order ? — certainly from new8|mpi»!^s« 
Thus a combhkation of materials^ collected irom 
the quarry, the mine, andithe forest, in the bands^ 
of a skilful ar^tecti.is reared into a magnificent 
temple that will endure for:a|;es4 

Numerous are the records of philosophical^ 

political, and oommercial intelligence, da^ly pre*? 

sented to .the curioust inquisitive, and intelligent 

people I of the Unitbdf I^ingdom* Facts of the^ 

utmost importanee to. tfalis gf eal; coimnuaity^ are 

&uft extensively, and speedily ^ cdrcid*ted,.And the 

discoveries and inventions of human research ian4 

ingenuity^ are not only reporded by the jonroalisti 

but tba ingenious tare stimulated to greater exer^ 

tions by the emokiment and repiitation iaccitiirable 

by merit. But) though tri]^. and scieniee. oftea 

d6€oral;ethe columns of the ephemeral Journal, 

error'too frequently oounteracts^their benigur in-^ 

ftienoe. The Ftess^ indeed^ has longj been, the 

efficieirti organ t of; inestimable cannranieatkHis# 

ibf not'imly the history>of»hatbnsy butithe records 

of'Re^elatiQni. haveibeeftt mukij^ied: by itsr addl 

All ther facts tthat^ we^ biow : o£< the pnesent; and 

future; worlds^, are^v as ifct wese^^ embfMbed^ and 

transimtted bgr/ tlser instrnnuntality oftliiisusfifid 

eogins^ < imd; itsropMatioDs^> uodmitha^gnidtofe 

ofrreasoftiaiidceligiQBf .hfttra iUilmmatodftltti'^en* 

poral pn^specis^iof aitfliiged< niM,i.««b npffdin 



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OR, SDNDON JEN 1620. ^7 

strenuously then should we depreemtethe misuse 
of the art of printing; and- how de^y should we 
regret th^t obliquity which can ilii^e the Press 
the pander of yice, the Jtooi of falsehood, the ad* 
vocate of tyranny, and the .demon of impiety! 
Like Satan transformed into an angel of light, 
the most debasing vices which contaminate so- 
ciety, assume the imposing forms of humour, wit, 
and liberality of sentiment, in some of our news- 
papers, where the pliant slaves of custom in- 
vent a palliative for every error 'however 'inde- 
fensible. 

The minds of the common people df 'England 
have been disturbed for some months, by the 
two-penny tracts of political scribes, particularly 
those of Cobbett and Wooler. The former of 
these worthies, like the Vicar of Bray, has 
changed his principles according to the impulse 
of vanity or avarice. His self-praise is certainly 
very amusing. -He thought it advisable to 
annoy the present ministry with his Registers 
from the Colombian shore, but recently returned 
to Old England, wberebe informs us, '^parlia- 
ment met fordispateh of ^boiiniess, the very day 
he landed.^' 'His journey ^from Liverpool to 
London, is described by himself, mu6h in the 
style of that of Bonaparte on his return from 
ElW to Paris! This honest, faithful, an4 disin- 
terested STATBMCAffy'StiidiBs hwd 4o-wbghtea 



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379 TfiE CNGLISH BfBTBOBOLlS ; 

tbe Reformers of Lancashire, who in ooose- 
quence of tbe act passed to prevent the circoIli<- 
tion of Blasphemaus and Seditious Lihdsr must 
pay a higher price for the precepts of their uop 
assuming instructor. 



THE ARTS. 

Whatever m?iy be the eventual effect of the 
general diffusion of knowledge by the continual 
production and reproduction of books, the arts 
also have contributed to national refinement, and 
are patronized i\i this country with more enthu- 
siasm than even literature itself. Painting, en- 
graving, and sculpture, have all been encouraged 
by the powerful aid of the nobility and gentry ; 
^nd Music has been the favourite pursuit of 
thousands of amateurs and professors. Cowper, 
with his psnal precision and force, has described 
the state of the Fine Arts in this metropolis : 

There, touched by Reynolds, a dull blank becomes 

A. lucid iniribr,' in which Nature sees 

All her rofli^ed features. Bacon there 

Qirea^^re \\^ female beauty to a s|ODe, 

i^n^ Chatham's elpqifeqce, tp marble lips. 

Nor does the chisel occupy alone 

Tile powers of Sculpture, but the style as much ; " . * 

Each province of her art her equal care. 

Witli^ nice iooiaon of her guided stetl 



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OH, u&smov IN 1820. 279 

She ploughs a braareo' field, and clothes a soil 
So sterile, with what charms ioe*er she will. 
The richest sc^n'ry and the loveliest forms. 

The self-denial enjoined by th« regulations of 
certain sectaries, iti evidently hostile to profane 
literatnre, and to the lister arts of painting, sculp- 
ture, and music, and if generally adopted in^ so- 
ciety, would exclude many of the gratifications 
of an improved imagination. Instead of the ex- 
quisite pleasure which connoisseurs now feel 
in the possession of a painting by an Italian 
master, the man of taste would be necessitated 
to have recourse to the visible works of creation, 
for that delight which he had so often tasted, 
while gazing on a latidscape depicted on canvas. 
The works of nature are indeed inexhaustible, 
and " ever charming ever new!^ to an unsophis- 
ticated mind; but a modern man of virtu has 
different, conceptions of the sublime and beauti- 
ful, and would rather purchase an accurate imi- 
tation of the scenery of nature, than receive gra- 
tuitous pleasure from the contemplation of the 
original. Indeed, from the wanton or extrava- 
gant taste of several connoisseurs, we mig^t 
conclude that they gloried in the violation of the 
second commandment. Their pleasure grounds 
exhibit the rude images of heathen gods and 
godd^ses ; their apartments shine with charm- 
ing imitations of feminine beauty j but while 



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980 THB ENGLISH imTB4»QL18 ; 

those fine modificatiotiSfof inert matter ^ave.pitr* 
chased for more than their weight in gold by the 
votary of taste, the living image of the Deity' is 
passed by with indifference, scorn, or ev§n ridi- 
cule, Jn the public ^streets by insolent. mortals, 
who, while they pay hundreds for a painting of 
a favourite horse or spaniel, will not bestow a 
shilling on suppliant mendicity. 

It must, however, he acknowledged, that the 
cultivation of the fine arts has contributed to 
the advancemeqt of knowledge, particularly 
among the ladies. About a century ago an ac- 
complished woman was quite unacquainted with 
proportions of the human form; except the 
tricing kno>vledge obtained in the nursery, by 
the conten^plation of imperfect forms, the modetit 
maiden was,pQt»permitted to indulge>rs^tional cu- 
riosity in, tl|e ftudy qf an art in which she was 
most warmly iuterested. The travels of a few 
learned ladies on the Continent, and (the vivacity 
with which th^ey described their discoverieSf at 
length ^prepiu^d the f^maie mind for the study of 
painting and ^o^^M^ire, and we can now boast of 
fair philQ^oph^l:9t who could giv^ a very instvuc- 
tive lecture. OP an^tqmy ! In^poetry, indeed* the 
ladies, vi:ho are admirers of whatever is grpat or 
beautiful, have been suffici^ntlj^ luxuriaut in 
their descriptions, inspmoicdi thf^t.thetlyr^ waiied 
wjaDtan ^bi^eath the anjwwtjugiprciwiire.of >thtir 



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OR, .IMNDON IN 18S0. 3ftl 

Iflowmgf Angers; and even Darwin in fai» 
<* Laves 0f the iP/fl»itfi/Mm<^'been< equalled, if not 
excelled by many a nuKlern Sapbbo. We cati 
alsa boast of fair^culptors, although moetof them 
have bad the decefioy .to be content with the^pro- 
duction of a bust instead of a statue. 

Asffofpaintkigy nobody conversant with. pofite 
life .will f contest Jkheir exoelktice iii)that art; lan 
art nifhadi ba» adorned. tliteirrfaoes with the'magie 
bloom, <the purple ^ht of l^^?nti«, \#hioh , allures 
so many votaries to pay their adoration ^at fthe 
footstool ic^ beailty. Some female artiste have 
given i^pectmensof their art on canvas and ivony^ 
but ! they shine brightest -in their performances , 
on an animated ground. There, indeed, the^deK^ 
cacy of tbeipencil in a femdie hand is cotAspiou* 
ously briUiflfnt, irresistibly enchanting! and ai9 
charily begins «t home, they are generally moett 
liberal in personal decomtion. Bat the art of 
beautify tog the female form and face, is chiefly 
confined to eiapecienced artists, while young ladies 
ave merely permitted :to make drawings -^df 
, flowers, foliage, or at most to take a likeness df 
another innntniatuve. The art of painting is'so 
great a favowite not only with ladies <but gentle- 
men, ^atmany a wealthy nobleman "is m 'pos- 
aession of paintings to the value of many*thetir 
sand pqundtt. Nay, «K> 'far have «ome ^i^ble 
amateurs ^amied their passion for pii^rnilpro- 



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983 THB ENGLISH Mfi¥ROPOU9 ; 

factions, that they have actiiaUy wedded heroines 
of the gr^n roonit notorious for the application 
of ccdours to the epide^^misl Thus the uian of 
imagination^ while enraptured with the iUnsive 
charms of a fair phantom, at once gratified bis 
taste and passion. 

Female artists possess several advantages over 
ladies unskilled in-the invaluable art of painting; 
The beauty of an tinpainted woman, however 

' perfect, must fade on the assaults of sickness, or 
the progressive decay of age. But the proficient 
in painting can, by the delicate, distribution of 
light and shade, baffle time in his invidious war- 
fare against comeliness, and to the last, appear 
in all the splendour of artificial loveliness. Now, 
what civilised society would voluntarily forego^ 
the pleasure obtainable from a constant exhibi- 
tion of animated painting; from a display. of the 
fine arts in their highest perfection, an excellenee 
not exceeded even by the Grecian 1m%9^ or any 
other celebrated d^nirep of antiquity ? Yet all 
these artificial t>rnaments must be sacrificed, '. 
should religion, qiodesty, and decency, prevail 
over the artifices of the ffishionable world. 

The dress, as well as the looks of our modish - 

X females, would also be modified by the band of 
decorum; and instead of the exposure of nudity^ 
or ^tbe glance of levity, women would . appear in 
pUio attire, emblematic of that punty of heart 



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OR, Mixiyox IN I8i0. 283 

so exquisitely attractive, so inexpressibly amiable, 
and incalculably estimable to the man of worth. 
The frippery and impertinence of fops would 
also give place to manly plainness of garb and 
manners. Instead of the competitions of vanity 
in a pul)lic display on a coach-box, or tt^e front 
box of a theatre, we should behold the opulent 
employed in the alleviation of pain, (he consola- 
tion of the unfortunate, and the relief of the des* 
titttte; ^ , 

As for the science of music, its charming and 
delightful influence cheers and elevates the mind 
in private parties, in public theatres,.in the court, 
in the camp, and even in the temple of the Deity. 
The great and unalterable defect of music, is 
that indistinctness with which it communicates 
ideas of the passions and sentinaents of ^hich it 
is intended to be the medium. Like .the phan^ 
toms of a vision its images vanish as soon as they 
appear, leaving an undefinable sensation on the 
nerves, which no language can describe. Thus 
the love expressed by music is not the passion, 
but rather an incitement to love; and hence the 
dangerous and -seductive influence of amatory 
airs on susceptible hearts. But when music is 
combined with poetry expressive of tendernesi^ 
its influence is increased to such a . degree, that 
it often is made a dangerous instrument of seduc- 
tion. The modifications of other passions and 



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88tt THB fSNGLSSH IftETROPOLIS; 

affections, as expressed by music alone, are also 
indistinct. Music has frequently been called in 
as the auxiliary of valour, but the musician may 
**. beat the d&ublmg drum with furious heat,'' 
without' being ^ble to conjure up a single spirit. 
flDhe momentary deration and vivacity infpired 
by martial sounds ^will subside on the approach 
of 'danger.; and if ^warriors hare no better inr 
eeiktire than imusic, their courage will expire 
with the last sound of the instrument, like that 
of rC^ptain Macheath when he exhausted the 
JBontents>of)his bottle. 

Mix/ffOK,,an'«nthasiflstie admirer of music, has 
deserlbcd devotional harmony as bringing '> all 
heaven before ills eyes;'' but what rational riW- 
gidnist has ever been able to realize this poetic 
vision? Thersolemnity jof saered muac,'as ittis 
called, may prepare some minds for the aWfid 
ntis of supplication , thanksgiving, and adoration, 
but can impart no rfeeling of gratitude for hless^ 
ings received from the ^Universal *Benefaetor, 
nor elevate the imagination (to anearer coiltem*- 
plation of the ineffable glory of God. (Ev^i^ms^ 
pif^on of human rart, 'however >sublime, ^mubt 
iiaiil and iprove /inefficient in A'.eommiinion with 
the I>eity; and like the loftiest fligkte of the 
eagle towards the moonday 8an,f must flag^iflutter, 
and sink, oveorconve by^ jsomwuidingf glony. , 

!Whatev€t refinement, gTaoe,ior elegance,iithe 



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OR, IjONBON in 1820. 285 

other fine arts « have introduced amongf us, tfaey 
seem to have operated with a pernicious hifla-' 
ence on our morals. Instead of that simplicity, 
sincerity, and purity of manners, for which our 
forefathers were celebrated^ a certain: exotio 
tinsel has been substituted for our sterling* goldi 

PUBMC AMUSEMENTS. 

Dare to have eease yours^vee ; assert tlie stAge^ 
Be justly warm'd with your own native rage : 
Such plays alone sliould win a British' ear^ 
As Cato's self h^d not disdain'd to hear. — Pope« 

Ptiblic amusements, especially those of' the 
DratBa, are peculiarly calculated to givetis^an in-^ 
sight into the manners and taste of a natibn j as 
comedies are often satires on existing follies, abd 
from the tenor of popular tragedies we may trace 
the refinement of the passions. Eyen^ fariqes and 
pantomimes . are not to, be^ oveflooked^ as they, 
generally exhibit, caricatures of the fashionable 
frivolities of the day. 

Theatrie exhibitions present so Mafny gratifii-' 
cations to the mind, that they will ever be fkyont- 
ites with a polished people. The eye' is d^w 
lighted 'with a variety of gracefdlfarmsi decorcrtedf 
ifr characteristic dresses, and dispjfiying tMe" 
afi^cting' gestures of ^passion, or the jnore^pfeast 
ing agility and graceof* motioncia the sprighllif' 



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38Q THE BMGLISU MBTBOPOLIS ; 

dance ; the ear is cbaimed with the harmony of ^ 
vocal and instrumeotal music ; the magic infliH 
ence of 9ympathy pervades the miud in unisou 
w'jth the dignified woe.of the tragic muse, or the 
nnimatiiig sallies of Thalia provoke irresistible 
mirth. To these charms may be superadded 
the interesting variety of graceful forms and 
animated countenances of the audience; while 
appropriate scenery, and the splendour of taper- 
light, give the whole an air of gaiety and plea- 
sure. 

With all these attractions, however, it is ques- 
tionable whether the stage has^ not contributed 
to immorality. Under proper regulations it 
^ould, as the poet has described it^ be a power* 
ful monitor — 

" To wake the soul by tender strokes of art, 
To mend the genius, and inform the heart ; 
To make mankind in conscious virtue bold, 
Live oW each scene, and be what they behold." 

But a candid inquiry will convince us that oajr 
most popular plays have .a pernicious effect on 
tb^ mind. . Shakspeare's tragedies, Othello,. 
Ma^fateth, ^amlet, and Richard the Third, con* 
tain several indecent passages and allusions, at 
once puerile and obscene* Those production^ of 
lewd genius were written to gratify the infant 
taste of the Hoglish nation ; but now, when it 



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OR, JMUpors IN 1820. 287 

has confessedly attained matority/ let us reject 
such passages, which have a much- greater affinity 
to didness than the idoliz<&rs of the Avonian 
bard would admit. 

The introdttctioD of the German drama, in the 
beginning of the present centm'y,' may be consi- 
dered as a phenomenon in the world of dissipa- 
tion. That the good sense of the English nation 
should tamely submit to this revolution of taste, 
is altogether inexplicable. 

When the Btranger was introduced to the 
pablic, many of our fair dames welcomed him to 
this hospitable metropolis. Their sympathy for 
the poor adul tress, so ably defended by KoTZE- 
BUB, was a striking proof of their sensibility : — 
'* a fellow-feeling makes one woudrons kimi:'' 
yet from the disrepute into which conjugal in- . 
fidelity has since fallen, the system of our male 
and female wisogynists does not obtain new 
proselytes ! 

As KoTZBBUE eloquently pleaded the cause 
of jadultery in llie Stranger j so in his Naturtd 
Son (or as it has been styled by an English play- 
wright, his Lovers' Vows) he has placed a kind, 
unwedded fair-one, in an equally affecting and 
amiable point of view. Hike Nohh Lie, written 
by the same dramatist, is another proof of the 
felicity of his invention in the extenuation of 
guilt. 



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288< THE BNOUSH MBTAOPOI.IS; 

H hasr been asserted, and with tratfa, that 
though iour modern comedies are inferior in b«- 
mour to those of Cqnob&vb and FAnaunATs^ 
they are more chaste and delicate in sentiment; 
T>be obscene allusion, the impious witticism, and 
indoeent gesture, are gradually vanishing from> 
th^ English stage; yeti eootigfa retnains to de^ 
serve the animadversions of ^ the moralist. Indeed, 
v[itk all our boasted refinement^ the ' morality of 
our theatres seems to consist in veimishf ng tlie 
haggard face of* Vice with* cosmetics. Their 
parity » like the. deanlbess^ of our fashioiiaUei 
belles^: is^ niet the removal of dirt, but the putting - 
it artfully on as a.beautifier ! 

^eme dramatic* writerscomplain d* the neglect 
of rOMumgers ; hxA \(me may judge, from thbse re- 
jected piecea which, have been published by the 
aflthors^ tfatere islittloTeasonita regoret the fastidi^ 
ousaes9 lof theatrical critkismv as probably most 
of the plays which have been refused w^ri^ uw 
WiOrikhyotFrepreseiitaftietii.. Letatibe^remembered 
pSHh^ that s^me ma»agers(' aspired; to^tbe: r^m 
tati<Mii ofdrtfrnalie Atnti^rs^ and. it w«iitbiit'reasoA^ 
able that tbejfi should* giver thenriowd pr odiwticvii 

With respeet it« th^actom^Bad c actiwses vofi tha 

prioeipUlM tbea^b^iseveral' off tbeCQ^^powessi coit^ 

sidarabW. talents { .butioner)geMrral ddTeet is,».thtit 

apparent consciousness of performing in the^pns^ 

3 



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OR» LONDON IN 1820. 289 

sence of an audience. This gives them an 
affected air in different characters and situations, 
while it destroys that pleasing illusion which 
ought to predominate in the mind of the specta- 
tor. Another defect is, the profusion of paint 
which they use. In their dress too, the actresses 
are censurable for a liberal .display of person, 
which occupies too much of the spectator's ima- 
gination. Modern pantomimes are reprehensible 
in several respects } for though the frolics of 
Harlequin and Columbine display a most pleas- 
ing variety of motion ; the appearance of giants, 
bears, pumps emitting flame, &c. are tidiculous 
and puerile. 

An absurdity in the audience, especially those 
in the galleries, is the requiring a song to be re- 
peated, of which, from the distance, they cannot 
understand a single syllable. All that an actress 
has to do oiti this occasion, is to come forward, 
and articulate a variety of musical sounds, ac-. 
companied with a smile, and a graceful attitude. 
She may save heUself the trouble of expressing 
one word. Were a favourite singer to make 
the experiment, she would not only receive 
plaudits, but hear the exhilarating encore re- 
souufled from the celestial regions; and on a 
repetition of the tone, she might rely on being 
dismissed with the loudest plaudits of those ex-' 
cellent critics! 



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200 THB )BKGLl6d ML&tH^FOElS ; 

Hiifiilg paid out iiespeo«i to the two {>fiti«ipai 
thfeatreft, tft^ hext itt gVadMion (is tih^ SuttiYn«ir 
titeatire, wlilch u certainly cowdtictcd ^ith <30tt* 
sideriible lability irnd addi^ss* To enum^frM^ 
the d^cCs, «r e^jMtlSute ob ttve meritB x)f tlv^ 
jpieces tepresenl^d therie, "Wcf^id b^ ^Xtna^t'k t^^ 
petitiM of what lias lalt^dy been nm^, ^xteptiti^ 
• that it is more peculifetly 'devoted to Thafia,*attd 
6f icbVirbe, Tigh* and fclry pvddtictiotis arte gene- 
hilly represiehted. Ih takny instances, <Jurin^ 
the last season, Wit and hritnOrir Aii^re liappily 
cbmbhied ftr the ttanftsetoent of ^tbe lowb ; buft 
MMeof tfi^ afterpieeei^ V^rb d^fkieM in e^ty 
respect. 

VV'hMever be tiife present defecits of our thet^tres, 
tftill they ftirni^h the tMdt pleasing und elegant 
6fli\\ iimtisenientsi to thfe ptiblic. ^he cet^ation 
dflfef^trie'exhibftions \V6tild i^eofder men more 
Mbix:)CibUle/iniberhl, and rdde. To ijise the wordu 
of «tn e!eg*itit iauthor,*** if meh of Wift who write 
for Che^a>g^e*Woilld turn their Hhoughts upon ex- 
dtiKg^ i9n<^h goiodnMiiiml impulses as^re inlhe 
atiiitetico, but Are ((^hMked up by vice and ki&ury, 
tliey'WduldTnpt dtily ple«se/but befltvend us 4ft 
tte saMe ^tinoe." ifieta^ It >is evid^ilt thait 'the 
r«pft^eta«Mion«ofiMniMttl«(ly^mtts itHist be<inju- 
itotis to/pdblic h^ppiiiate,'^MIe^e»dis|Attylrf 
Vftttie, ib th^ tMtiVe Udvelibe^, #6dld etaguge 
the admiration^ and purify the heai^t^^fhe'^pde^ 
tator. 



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OB, X^ONBON IK 1820. 291 

In this enlightened age, the belief in the et(- 
ittence of a De?il setm» almost exploded by the 
irreligions, that is to say, the major part of man-* 
kind. But let u» merely, by way of illn^tration,' 
admit tfafit such a being does exist, ttnd aecoid- 
log to the idea of the Methodists, that he is v^y 
basj among the playeiiisi« Hence arises a cotitest, 
if not a cotnpetitio.n between Methodism and the 
old Gentleman. At the commencement of this 
just and necessary war, the De?il was in pos- 
session of the strongest posts Imaginable. The 
heights of Pride formed his princtparstreng^h^ 
Vanity defended his wmgs, and ®elf-love was^ 
his almost impregnable intrenchment. The Me- 
thodist came armed against tins old enemy to 
tnlth 5n the divine punopiy described by St. Paul; 
and the conflict has been continued with more 
t):HMi common obstinacy, and with various suc- 
cess, for more than half a century. Bs^LzcBtoB, 
tike BtONAVAitTB, is a deep pdlitimn, and intre* 
pid general ; hot bis opponents hare, as tliey 
think, justice on their side, and they hope for 
even^al -success. 

T!hete is a striking coivtrast in most of the 
measures adopted bj 4he Methodists and their 
aiTch opponent, though in some instances they 
haverecowsetoidmilar^^pedieiito*! llieplaj^arf 
present Iheir noctumail ^aiiffiealioos,. for ^irfridi 
tbey rehire a price ; Ibe Methdlistsp elfef eadlttid 

t2 

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202 THE ENQUSU METROPOLIS;, 

happiness gratis. Both parties have availed them- 
selves of the powers of eloquence and mastc ; but 
the players, by a greater diversity of gratifica- 
tionSy have, hitherto obtained a greater share of 
popi;larity. Players call in the aid of the passions, 
laugh and weep alternately, and employ per- 
suasion io recocomend voluptuousness in the guise 
of mpmlity ; and while they flatter self-love, vi- 
tiate the crowd under the plausible pretext of 
refinement and ekgant recreation. On the other 
hand, the, Methodists require the ^practice of hiv 
mility, repentancei and. prayer, as preparatory 
to the reception pf divine iUuqoiipiation. This 
disoiplihe, no ^irited jx\2iXi of the. world, or oc- 
compZi^Aec/ lady, would submit to; hence the 
giddy ihropg followed the fascinations of the 
theatre, whiles a considerable portion of the com- 
munity resplved to embrace Methodism, an€2/>2ay 
the fool no longer. 

On his. own hereditary dominions, the public 
Stage, the old Gentleman has firmly established 
his despotism over the " lovers of pleasure." 
There he marshals all his forces against pious 
ionpvators, who disturb the orgies of vice, by 
sounding the Gospel trumpet. On the boards 
appeal: in pqmpous prpq^ssion. Tragedians in 
ggi;geous a|tire, armed with swords, daggers, and 
poisoned bowls ; their mouths .filled with blas- 
pheifiy,. fa^ratioiii ai»] bombast, and their brow^ 



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OR, LONDON IN' 1820. 293 

raised in proud defiance of all opposition : — Co- 
medians laughing at old-fashioned religion; and^ 
with insidious ridicule, depreciating the zeal'of 
modern reformers; and buffoons, dancers, and 
singers,' with ludicrous gesticulations, mirth-in- 
spiring music, and graceful attitudes, complete 
the multiform attractions of histrionic seduction. 
In opposition to this formidable host, the Metho* 
dist Preacher presented himself' in a plain dress, 
Bible in hand, and stood uuappalled amid the 
hisses, execrations, and buffetings of a senseless 
mob, like Abdiel among the apostate Angels. 
When he could obtain a hearing, bis reproof si- 
lenced clamour ; the people stood aghast, while* 
he pathetically described their danger — the gulph 
of perdition to which they were impelled by thefr 
revolt against the will of God, and thd insanity 
with which they rejected the means of lasting 
felicity, and grasped at illusory and evanescent 
pleasure. 

Thus the players spread all their allurements, 
and the multitude hastened to participate their 
joys, and their temporary triumph, over what 
. they ternoed fanaticism ; but a considerable num- 
ber of rational beings were convinced by their 
own con9eience,thatsacred truth was inestimable; 
imd the progfress of reformaticm and consequent 
happiness is now equable, steady, and suiDcessfuL 



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304 THS SNOLTSH MKTROPOUS ; 

The contest bettreen Metbodism and the St4ge 
18 yet uodecicied ; the votaries of waittoA plen- 
sure adhere with fatal fidelity to that beabteou^, 
but destructive. Syren; while the religious part 
of the community shrink from her contagious 
touchy as the^ would avoid a pestilence^ Doubtt 
less the united exeHions of wit» humour, and ri«- 
dicule, on one side, and emphatical appeals to 
Ihe heart and bead on the other, will divide man^* 
kind for ag^ei: but the diminution of the old 
Gcfntleman^B influence begins to be sensibly felt 
by his vasHals^ among whom even some princes 
and nobles arte proiid t6 appear. 
.. On a candid examination of the pretensions of 
theatried performers to popularity, perhaps it 
will be fbuttd that they conti^ibute in a small d^ 
gree to thd n^finetkeni of th^ir felldw»oiti8ena^ 

That bur morals h^vid been purifi^ in the dra^^^ 
iMtic onicible isi bowevtfr, extremely doubtful ) 
i)Ut that amorous propensities, a passion ta be 
distiBgunh^ as ttidh of gattantry^ and d prOkiip- 
tilude to vindieate oJkr conduct by the ord^l of 
gn^powder aiid lead, hi» . ba^n foilientad by 
C^ncdiiBi^ and Tragedies loo^ no person ooiii. 
▼•rtiamt vi^ith the Draoia will derly» It is from 
thd herott of Meltxim^i«, wbo defy heaven and 
earthy i\m/k mdn of exalted sentknenta raoeivd the 
fibiihiiig foKsb pf rdki0ititet| and bnrnkig wMi 



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a passion vfor glory, they retire from the T^^fttr^f 
with a determiQfttion to imitate svid^ peffect ^\Qr^ 
dels of magDS^qiini^y. 

Thp phantom of Hqnour panegyrised by Prft? 
watists, and exhibited by Plftyewij i^ well <^er 
f cribed by o^e of our Poets : 

" But ere we do engage in Honour's cause, 
First know whence Honour ie, and what she was. 
Bcom'd by the base, and eourted l^ iliie bcaT»> 
The hero's tyrant, and the coward's slave; 
8he liyes when in IJeatV? f nn? tll^ Bpldipr li^« 
But when his safety he consults — ^^^he ^ies! 
Bigotted to this Idol we disclaim ' 

Health, peace, and ease, for noAing but a name.'' 

If duelliiig, mUit y^wm»$ wd e«tnlFaga^tgalMr 
rosHyi ^t ^tbe )e;¥pen«e ^ kitegr^yt aq^ Mndfjusir^ 
to %he 09«4t«ttiao of m^Q^^im )bf m^y be^ibBr 
mated )»to tim viff^y M}ff^ Qlmo^mm.f^mw^iitk 
)>y the fi#g)»«h 3liig^: bul ttml; our l3ii>jM of 
9MiaI en^0M9p|;, ^ocmiiAil iadii^7# aod tb# ib«n 
Q§Fpleirt pfiMtiivr Qf ftho^e neii^bQOiiiy /oftcod «» 
CP)d»cive Ao 4be QCiofprt i93 wdl m 4;Ip# iti^litjr 
of ^Hiz(^d li£et /em dedm nid from Mfwc iUnth 
tg!i^9»s of mtttre^ /or flMStifioinl uuitationA of pM^ 
^i^9» is ejctrew^ ijB^>i3ab?)blei 

Ewm iircommM lila,itj^e aaqvi^Mani obtain* 
aUe t^ty ^ MttstriMM classes, liy freqaeatbg 
th^ fNiUk jjThefMkm, are not less iOu^QOs Ikaii re* 
liMk^Ufi* A diiU i>emg w]io» la his mab^al 



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296* THB EN6I.ISH METROPOLIS; 

staiBf can scarcely coant his fingers, may, by the 
aid of the Dramatic art, pass for a very clever 
fellow. He has only to commit to memory a few 
of the wretched puns supplied by Reynolds's 
Comedies; or some of the polite execrations of 
DiBBiN ; and repeat them with an imitation of 
the droll gestures of Emery and Pawcett, to 
pass for almost as great a Wit as the Rev. Mr. 
Beresford, compiler of the Miseries of Human 
Life! 

Indeed, the Stage may, by proper application 
on the part of ignorant young men and women 
who wish for improvement, in some degree sup* 
ply the want of a Boarding-School, or, as it is 
termed, a polite edaeatioi). Aspiring young 
feliows may improve their air, and Jheir conse- 
quence too, by- imitating the fine gentlemen of 
tiie green-room, and mia^y, by proper attention to 
study, learn all tiie newest and most emphatical 
oaths, and other' impoitant exclamations, with 
suitable contortions, which may be classed under 
the head of ornamental accomplishments. Girls, 
whose native modesty has given them a certain 
vulgar air of bashfuluess very unbecoming in this 
age of refinement, may, by attention to the dress, 
atiitddes^ leers, and gracefully playful move- 
ments €i Actresses, become sprightly rompSf to 
the great improvement of their appeai'ance. 
They n»ty also ^Atiie in the art of decoration, and 



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OR, LONDdN IN 1820. 297 

like the ancient Britons, beaQ|;ify their faces by 
a variety of cosmetics; and thanks to the ac- 
tivity -and zeal of modern chymists, any young 
woman who is desirous of obtaining the '^ purple 
light of hvBy^ may varnish herself for a few pence, 
in the highest style of theatrical and meretricious 
decoration. 

So multiform and various indeed are the means 
of refinement, alias corruption, afi^prded by the 
stage^ that the bare enumeration and description 
of them wduld filt a voldme. Whatever is costly 
in nature, or elegant in s^rt, is imitated], if not 
realized by lAe histrionic tribe : whose transitions 
from the tavern to the court or the camp is 
instantaneous ; who atone hour strut as conque- 
rors, or kneeling with the true spirit of chivalry^ 
lay the wreath of victory at the fe^ of bedizenjed 
beaiity ; and tbe n^ct, appear in the character of 
JoBSON, assertic^ the authority of that lordly 
being, man. . . 

The assumed contfequence of Players is fo- 
mented by many causes. The various characters 
they personate has a tendency to fill the imagina- 
tion, with strange whimsies. The pride of thea- 
trical performers is exalted to a most egregfions 
degree by the plaudits of an audience, insomuch, 
that when invested with tinsel regjalia, amid the 
aodamations of attendajtits, and cheered by (be 
shouts of tbe exoellent critics who decorate the 



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galleriei, the fidilioiui Emperor, or Ckmqnerw, 
ieds all tbe Momentory, nay,, frantic el6vatH>ii 
wbicb exalted Alsxanpba iato a demi^god- 

** With ravish'd ears, 

The Monarch heani ; 

Awamot theOo4 

Affects to nod. 

And seems to shake the spheres." 

The anMsemeiits of several persobs of quality, 
the ostentatious display of tbeir eqnipages in the 
royal parks, and principal squares and streets of 
London ; tbeir magnificent fetes, and oaeasiond: 
fonoy balls, in which theatrical eifeot is often 
sitrongly produced, all bare a ten<foncy to exalt 
the Thespian tribe to unmerited distinction. 
Indeed the ambition of players, and their lev« of 
fttme have been illustrated hy many events sine* 
Thespis and his jovial ferew #rst asoeiided tkeir 
cart, and lirom timt envi^le Novation gratiied 
the eyes and ears of an admiring populace, in 
the present «g«, notbing less than personating a 
sovereign or a hero <a411 satisfy a firsl-rate ador, 
and wliat heroine of the green-room woidd stoop 
to Iess4han royal dignity, vmless oocasionally to 
exfiiWt her powers and graces w a distrossad 
damsel, or afine lady ? 

Bnt ambitioa of a more bencieial naitore, w 
whidb realities are prdKsrrad 4o appesrranees, baa 
ftred th^fisir %oBons e( onr nineliie her ofa i ee > 



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om^-LonDOK IN 1820. tdO 

They bare furbished all the armonr of love, and 
displayed their attractions to captivate the hearts 
of certainvM>ft<^headed peers, and tender-hearted 
commoners^ and their success has been so great 
that they bid fair to transfer a mushroom species 
of impoging beauties and accomplishments from 
the green-room to the drawing-room; Thus the 
delights of the stage are, it seems, as precarious 
as any other kind of earthly enjoy tnent ; for if a 
ikvourite female singer, or dancer, a tragic o!^ 
comic actress, appears for a few nights in all the 
attractions of paint, lace, nudity, and jewels ; nay, 
even of gewgaws and tinsel, 'tis ten to one but 
she is carried off by some stlly adomr, who, like 
a giafit in romance, bears her in trinmfih fa^ 
beyond the ken of her nightly admirers. In this 
manner no less than three peeresses have ei^ 
dianged the theatrical diadem for the real eoro^ 
net of nobility ; another histrionic grace, remark* 
able for her gaiety, vivacity, and agility, bw 
been taken to the arms of a doting banker, and 
recently, a member of the Lovt^er House, has de- 
prived the pnblic of a tragic heroine, who shone 
without compeer. In short, so strong has been 
the passion in high life for accomplished actresses, 
that little is left ub of beatify or excelfamoe to 
adorn the boards ; and unless some new statnte 
bn ei»ac«ed for the p r e w srv n tion of faistrionie game, 
tfaoie n«ldln4»rained ^chers wiH make prey of 

2 



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300 THE ENGLISH METROPOLIS; 

the priestesses of Melpomene and Thalia, wait* 
ing maids and all ! 

Happily for the English dramatic art, onr 
tragedy heroes are yet safe. Kean, as a married 
man, cannot be carried off by some raving 
dowager, or simpering and sensitive young lady 
.of quality, because the law respecting bigamy 
affords him protection. We may therefore cal- 
culate on the pleasure derivable from his per- 
formances for some years to come. It is to be 
hoped that M^Cready will also be spared to, us 
for a year or two ; and if there are any symptoms 
of his charms operating /too forcibly, we must 
keep him out of sight for a few nights till the 
danger is over ; for if the mania for our heroes 
should seize some spirited ladies, as it has afOlict- 
ed certain great men, who have been fasci- 
nated by the natural, and artificial charms of 
actresses, the managers may close their doors in 
despair. 

Our dramatic critics have loudly complained 
of the paucity of new plays exhibited in our 
principal theatres, and the insignificance of those 
few which have been performed. But observa-* 
tion and reflection will convince them, that such 
a deficiency is imputable to the pride, envy, or 
false taste of managers. When the late Mr. 
Sheridan was arbiter eleffantiarum of one theatre, 
and Mr. Harris of the other, the one was too 



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OR, LONDON IN 1820, 801 

Tain, and the other too inattentive to encourage 
contemporary dramatists. Sheridan, who like the 
Turk, would " bear no brother near the throne,*' 
doubtless felt a disinclination to patronise the 
merit of another dramatic writer ; and when Mr. 
Kemble was manager, his characteristic reserve, 
and love of money, operated against the success 
of any application to him. Mr. Harris, though 
allowed to 'be a good-natured and liberal man, 
had neither taste nor inclination to induce him 
to encourage dramatic adventurers. 

When the management of Drury-Iane Theatre 
was confided t« a committee of gentlemen, the 
old adage, that ^< what is every body's business 
is nobody's business,'' was completely illustrated. 
Applications on the part of authors were neg- 
lected, and even those manuscript plays, which 
lay on the shelf, to the number of two hundred, 
or more, were mostly rejected. 

If such be the real state of theatrical patron- 
age and management, and who can disprove 
the assertion, what man of genius and spirit will 
sit down and waste half a year of his existence 
in the production of a tragedy or comedy, with 
which he would be compelled to attend the kvee 
of any inferior being, who happened to be invested 
with theatrical supremacy ? The plain matter of 
fact is, that managers in general have turned 
dieir attention principally to the funds of the 



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80S THE in^fOUSH MBTBCrPOUS; 

ettflblisboient, and ttesiroiis to fill th^ treasjary, 
will resort to any expedieat for that pprpoae^ 
regardkis 4)f the moral effect lof iiistrionlc re- 
ptiesentationa on the oommuBaty. AvAJtiOB i» 
tbeir wasleivpassioi], that (dcaci^^idn of avarice 
peeafiar to London, vfhich coUeofai and grasps 
ommey eag^erly, to spend it profusely. Thas, the 
Honey-Mooti of Tobin, evidently garbled from 
Slialk$peare*s Taming the 8hre^, is st^aiched, as; 
it were, from the tomb of the antbor, because it 
costs the manager notbing but mmie scenery;. 
Guy Ifannering is fnan«i;&eti]red into one Mdo- 
Drama, and ^ Heart of Bf id Lathian iiito an- 
(jfflier ; and any piece 'whidh can be got up with 
least expencCt is preferred to an original prodoc* 
tian, for which a price might be demanded t>y an 
aodior. 

The <?rowd of frequenters off Idle public theatres, 
go thither for mere woosement; few rei^l critics 
are to "be f^atkA <ibere, and soase of those ate the 
satellites of managers, who poff any new pieeie, 
however tmr4al,^a&d any parfonner, however de- 
fective, 4)y well writiQA paragrafdis and reriews^ 
puUished in the inarafu»g newspiqpers. 

ht present the^assiod'ctf the laAies for han&^ 
some public men ia <^ie0y isonfined to the era* 
tors <t(ihe ^«ilpit, and fbe presfnt era in BMmer- 
iftle forlfbe frequem^y of tne^rimenial union be^ 
tween preceptive saints nad ad|pki»g 'sianava^- 



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oRt iiONBoif IN lasa sot 

iasonMidli tktt an trnmarrtdd pofHulMr pronchin^ 
especially amcmg tiie I>is8efttara» majr eaoBMcr 
hia fortune oiade. While our apirited dromtm 
^nfine their ]pnrtiaHty to the ddth^irft mmf anuu 
look their itiMgeoca of dicir aoMUKia jpvmfet^ 
akies ; bi»t if diey should cast a langiQ|rc^ott 
Ibe ata^ the hiafationic art wiH be raiaed, zanil 
evea Harlequin, with all kts ^^ty^ wilt be a»- 
able to escape iroai tfadr eaabraoea. 

That Mrs* Becber was the chief otiiteetye bth 
roiae ^f 4he Gaulish <stage aiuoe Mra. Stthbms 
tired^ will tuaft he <disptitiedf hut sift^eaabe 
ohaoged the ^r€ha^ the dskgfger, and dap 4ft 
MelpoBiene lor bridal omaaoeiitSy miA uMtaaii 
af itudyiag the worics of ShBikspeare, tarnedlier 
iU.tentiea t6 thie study and ^practice of 4he ailinary 
art, ft does sot appear tihot «he apyoiatad^ hg/i^ 
Unaae aaceeHsor. fiktr husbanMl is 4mid vto ^be 
ab^ut'foity yeare df age^ and rthe lady faerdelf*M 
loaatlfairty^ «o (that .they (both hafvie arrived at 
yeaos nrfdisor^ion. M k theitefovesto beiiopegdy 
that tb^^ill i»e iilaasad with a progeny as Alia- 
aaaetaoidxgraveitoctheaiBel'vnes* ^ 

(She puny tattempts of »tbe tw^ &eiiitfloB <o 
tfa(a8kitte,<B»id^dter,icBrtBinyieoe8 for qr ep toi oiita ^ 
liba aa <the staj^^ fidhDan^s vridioalaus *cmiia 
eftiaion, euMtled ^ lAJbbmdjand at ifomey' ^tbe 
adl UDDre ^paapnsteroBs dtaaciatsc lattempta ^af 
OdliMa, «id lAe sober joowedias of Mw^dbdli^ 



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804 THE i:Ngi.[SH metropous ; 

bald, have all failed of soccess. Sven the trage^ 
dies and comedies of Shakspeare himself/ tire by 
frequent repetition. Every winter the fown 
must' be amused with the antiquated manners of 
the personages characterized by the ''Warwick- 
shire wngf''^ whose principal plays are represent- 
ed fcM* the purpose of proving the abilities of 
some aspiring actor or actress. Is it liberal on 
Hie part of Managers, thus to present the same 
thmtrical fare to their guests ? Indeed the an- 
nual appearance of the name of Richard the 
Third, Macbeth, Hamlet, and Othello, in capi- 
tes on the play-bills, demonstrate the inactivity 
and dulness of the caterers for public taste, who, 
if they can but fill their treasuries, have few 
scruples about the means, and little or no solici- 
tude respecting the gratification of their patrons. 
It was expected by persons who disapprove of 
theatrical representations, that the ridiculous ex- 
hibition of the boy Betty, about sixteen years 
ago, as a hero in tragedy, would irrecoverably 
have extinguished the passion for dramatic amuse- 
ment ; but that temporary ebullition of popular 
curiosity having ceased, Kemble and Mrs. Sid- 
dons soon restored the Tragic Muse to her ori- 
ginal dignity. The extravagant price of ad- 
mission to our principal theatres, has since oc- 
casioned thin bouses in many instances ; and the 
subsequent disappearance of Kemble and his 



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OR, LONDON IN 1820. 305 

sisteFf was unpropitioas to the success of mimetic 
exhibition. Kean then came into notice, and has 
since shone without compeer. He may be term- 
ed the great man-&ountain surrounded by little 
Lilliputians ; from the mediocrity of talent among 
his coadjutors, the representation of our most ce- 
lebrated tragedies must inevitably partake of a 
ludicrous, if not farcical character; and this 
actor, like Godwin's St. Leon, be compelled to 
exist in solitary splendour, amid the falling stars 
of the theatrical hemisphere. 

Observant and reflecting minds have taken dif-r 
ferent views of the moral eflect of stage entertain* 
ments. Thus while some authors have extolled 
the public theatre as the school of elegance, and 
knowledge of men and manners, others have con- 
demned it as the lazaretto of mental contagion 
and defilement. Perhaps both are wrong, and 
the stage has not that paramount influence on the 
morals of society which either its adnCTirers or 
censors have sup4>osed. That theatrical exhi- 
bitions have considerable influence over the minds 
of the youn^ and thoughtless, may however be 
asserted, and undoubtedly much of the levity, 
folly, and afiectation of numbers of the youthful, 
and* even the middle-aged inhabitants of this 
meti^olis, originates in their imitation of the 
gesticulations, and repetition of the silly and pro- 
fane witticisms of bufibons on the public stage. 

V 



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306 THE ENGLISH METROPOUS ; 

Players, singers, and dancers will ever be en- 
couraged by a luxurious people who delight in 
sensual gratification. But as far as respects the 
wages of a performer, whether five pounds a 
week, or fifty, is not a subject of satiric animad- 
version. The influence of the characters which 
players personate is to be considered, and it cer- 
tainly is pernicious, if the fact be admitted that the 
majority of the heroes of tragedy, are villains, 
and most of those in comedy, profligates. 
What moral benefit, for instance, can an audience 
receive from a review of the ambition, cruelty, and 
hypocrisy of Richard the Third ; the treachery 
and treason of Macbeth; the vengeful jealousy 
of Othello, the unnatural criminality of George 
Barnwell; or, even the seemingly justifiable re-* 
venge of Hamlet, or Zanga ? 

To the candid and sober-minded inquirer it 
must' be evident, that our great places of public 
amusement, the King^s Theatre, and those in 
Drury Lane and Covent Garden, are magnificent 
temples of dissipation, where sensuality is dei- 
fied by the lovers of mimetic exhibition, and 
whatever can gratify the eye and the ear, is pre- 
sented to the mind in the most seductive and im-^ 
pressive manner. 



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<3fR,'lJ&inD«N Iw *820. 907 

' «*^ Birthfy sbim^i thodgh sweet and well cdmbift'd, 
And lamest Bi^^oft (plates tD.thermind, 
licave, vice and folly unsubdued behind^" 

It IS tbeiQbief.cfaaracteruitic of the prom) nptindf 
to aspire to, the exclo9ive ei^oyment of something, 
unattainable hy others. , History records tbe 
absard qoippetitioos of high-spirited dames t^-^ 
specting excellence in per$oniU decoration ) and. 
the arch*pfiend, as desicrib^d in the noblest epic 
poem ever written, glories even in puraaioant in** 
felicity, 4pd exclaims— 

To ndga u worth amUtion, though in heH ! 

To this aspiring disposition of the proud, we 
may tracie the origin of the Italian Opera in 
England; btoit however delightful the dialogue 
and songs breathed by etotic lungs may sound 
in the ears of those personages who understand 
the native language of modern harmony, the vain 
who descend into the pit, and the ignorant who 
climb to the gallery of the Opera House, only 
evince their folly, while they fondly imagine' 
they establish their claim to fashionable taste, bf 
their appearance in a theatre originalijr intended 
for the amusement of the great. 

What, indeed, can be more insignificant than *' 
the divertisements of the Italian Opera? So 
great at present is (he sterility of invention among 
the writers for thi^ ^spuriotis species of dramatic 
entertainment, that Cinderella, after having so 

U2 

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308 THE BNGUSH METROPOU8. 

long delighted the overgrown children of this 
metropolis on the English stage, now makes her 
appearance as an Italian harmonist ; and her new 
name, ha Cenerentola, is most musically repeated 
by those, harmonious souls in the gallery ; and 
mouths which seem better adapted to receive a 
large Grerman sausage, are distorted most fright- 
fully in imitating the seraphic graces of Madame 
Bellochi, while the flexible limbs of the per- 
fumer's shopman are twisted into all the contor- 
tions of that ludicrous buffoon, Ambrogetti. 

Such are the rational delights obtainable twice 
a week at the Italian Opera, where the votaries 
of harmony and the graces may hear most melli- 
fluent sounds — sense is out of the question — and 
feast their eyes on the agility and grace of fan- 
tastical French dancers. A passion for music is, * 
indeed, very general in London. As for the real 
merit or dement of musical competitors for po- 
pularity-on the boards, the subject seems to have 
been treated in so masterly a manner by Swift, a 
century ago, that his decision will ever be found 
applicable and conclusive in settling the claims 
of the sons of song. 

«^ THE MUSICAL <tJONTEST. 

" Some say that Signior Bononcini, 
Compar'd to HandelV a mere ninny : 
Others aver, that to him Handel 
Is scarcely fit to hold a candle. 
Strange ! that such difference should be, 
. *Twixt Tweedledum and T weedledee V 

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APPENDIX. 



EXTRACT 



THE POPULATION JRETURN, 

PUBUSBED OS THE AUTHORITY OF AN ACT PASSED ilf 
THE FIFTY-riRST GEO. XJX. 



X HE Metropolis of the British Eiup ire, bei^g 
situated in the two counties of Middlesex and 
Surrey, could not be distinctly noticed in any 
preceding part of die Parish Register Abstract; 
its population is exhibited in Jive divisions j and 
amounts to one million, nine thousand, five hun- 
dred and forty^six persons.; but considering 
that fourteen thousand ai-nvsds of shipping, an-* 
DuaHy» makes a cbnsC^nt, though fluctuating 
accession to M pofruidtian^ to a larger amount 
flisn elsewhere; a^wenty-ftfth part, instMd of a 
thirtieth part^ is aiMed, Jn foraiiti|^ a comparison 
with the Parish Register Returns. > »With this 
addition, the MeknpoUsy in tiie yeeir 1^1 , con* 



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310 



APPENDIX. 



tained nine hundred thousand inhabitants; in 
1811, one million and fifty thousand. 



THE METROPOLIS. , 


POPULATION. 


1700. 


1750. 


1801. 


1811. 


l.*-City of London,! 
within the W9\\9, J 

2.— City of London,) 
wtfAoiaiJievall^J 

3.I^itY and Liberties > 
of Westmins^r.. J 

4.— Out Parishes, ) 
withjn the Bills > 
of Mortality ...) 

in the Bills ofS 
Mortality 3 

Total of the Metropolis 


139,300 

69,000 

130,000 

326,900 
9,150 


87,000 

, ^7,9op 

152,000 
357,600 

22,350 


78,000 

56,300 

165,000 

477,700 
123,000 


57,700 

68,000 

168,600 

^3,700 
162,000 


674,360 


676,250 


900,000 


1,050,000 



1. — The walls of the ancient City of London 
included a spaee» noiw in the middle of the 
Motropdis, about one mile and a half in length, 
from eaat to »west, 93ad rather more than half a 
mile in breadth. The Population has diminished 
above three-fifths since the tbegmning of the last 
Cieirtury ; . Jpmdy streets JbiLvipig been widened, 
jiqd {NSibliQi bijyd^ihgs /and warehouses erected, 
iwherel^y:<,the ^piuttber .of jiafcahitnnts .has been 
thus le9$6tied^ . , .' . ^ 

3.-^Tlie City of; l0^ii^mifiMfH$l .the mmih, is 



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APPENDIX. 311 

an extension of the same ancient city, and is 
under the same jurisdiction. In computing the 
increase or diminution of the Population of this 
district, by means of the parish registers, two 
difficulties occur; first, because several of the 
parishes, which form part of it, extend so far 
beyond its limits, as almost to double the amount 
of population, if these parishes are included 
entire. It has, therefore, been necessary to as- 
certain the increase or diminutipn upon the 
entire parishes, and afterwards to apportion it 
between the City wiihaul the walls^ and the out^ 
parishes, the enumeration returns of the parts 
within the City and without being distinct. The 
other difficulty arises from the disputed jurisdip* 
tion of the City of London, as to the Borough of 
Southwark, a claim which has not been sub- 
stantiated ; and the five Southwark parishes are 
accordingly here reckoned among the out- 
parishes. 

3. — The City of Westminster, once an ejMs- 
copal-see, and tiow the seat of government, ad- 
joins the City of London, extending westward.' 

4. — The appellation of the Out-pari^heSf is 
taken from the London Bills of Mortality, which 
were first 4ised ip the year 156?; and from 
1603, have been kept in regular series. Tfaese 
bill/i were intended to i^^ord timely notice of 
i^ny alarming increase ^ the pUigw; from which 



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312 



AFPfiNDIX. 



London was then seldoih free. But ihe crowded 
part of the city ]p«ras purified by the memorable 
conflagration of 1666; in the preceding year, 
68,596 persons had died of the plague, which 
has since entirely disappeared. The bills of 
mortality purport to exhibit the number of 
christenings and burials, but are not to be relied 
upon for the full number of either. A compa- 
rison of the results of these bills is subjoined. 



Baptiims and BuriaU within the London Bills of Mortality . 


i - 


BAPTISMS. 


BURIALS. 


Accord: BIT 
to the PArith 


the Bills 


Accordliir 
to the Pa^h 


AccordliWto 
theBli^ 




Regifter. 


of Mortality. 


BegUter. 


of Mortality. 


1700 


16,3dl 


15,616 


20,298 


20,471 


1710 


15,270 


14,928 


23,258 


24,620 


1720 


18,690 


17,479 


23,450 


25,454 


1730 


18,473 


17,118 


25,309 


26,761 


1740 


17,400 


15i231 


29,704 


30,811 


1750 


16;582 


14,548 


24,199 


23,727 


1760 


16,633 


14.951 


20,737 


19,830 


1770 


18,589 


17,109 


22,989 


22,434 


1780 


17,649 


16,634 


21,511 * 


20,517 


1700 


20,546 


18,980 


19,359 


18,038 


1800 


19,177 


19.176 


25,670 


23,068 ^ 


1801 


18,275 


17.814 


19,434 


19,374 


1802 


20,411 


19,918 


20,260 


19,379 


1803 


21.308 


« 20,983 


19,803 


19,582 


1804 


21,769 


21,543 


16,829 


17,038 


1805 


21,067 


20,295 


17,862 


17,565 


1806 


21,655 


20,880 


17.130 


17,937 


1807 


21,277 


19,416 


19,319 


18,334 


1808 


21,376 


19,906 


20,068 


19,954 


1809 


22,108 


19,612^ 


17,313 


16,680 


1810 


21,298 


19,930 


20,961 


19,893 



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AVPBNDIX. 313 

Anterior to the year 1750, this comparison is 
not perfect, eleven , parishes having been brought 
into the bills of mortality, between the yeara 
1726 and 1745. 

The number of nnreffistered interments in the 
Metropolis, has been a question much agitated^ 
on occasion of forming computations for life 
annuities, and for other purposes. In the last 
six months of 1794, it was ascertained by the 
collector of the then tax on burials, that 3,148 
persons were interred without being registered ; 
and it is not likely that the whole number of in- 
terments, or even of burial grounds, were dis- 
coverable for the purpose of taxation. If it be 
assumed that, on account of the unregistered in- 
terments, a third part (about 7000 annually) 
may be added to the registered burials, the 
mortality of the Metropolis, in 1700, was one in 
twenty-five ; in 1750, one in twenty-one ; in 1801, 
(and the four preceding years) one in thirty-five; 
since that, only one in thirty-eight ; thus shew* 
ing a gradual improvement in the health of the 
Metropolis, to a^ large amount ; but it was to be 
expected that the extension of population over a 
larger space than formerly would have this salu- 
tary effect. 

5. — A few parishes, now forming part of the 
Metropolis, have not yet been brought into the 
bilb of mortality. The rapid increase of the 

1 



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314 



APP£NI>1X. 



population of this district since the beginDing of 
the last century 9 shews how rapidly the Metro- 
■polis increases in extent, although its population 
has not increased so fast as that of the kingdonn 
in generd. In 1700, the Metropolis contained 
almost an eighth part of the inbabitapts of Eng- 
land and Wales; in 1750, above a tenth part, 
and at present rather less than that proportion^' 

6. — Objections may undoubtedly be made to 
the propriety of the limits of the Metropolis 
herein assumed ; it may therefore be right to 
add, that the total population of all the parishes 
whose churches are within a circle extending 
eight miles around St. Paul's Cathedral, (in* 
eluding the aforesaid addition of one twenty-fifth 
part) amounts to one million two hundred and 
twenty thoiusand. 

The population ascribed to the City of Paris, 
is incited in a district of this si^e. 



SUMMARY OF THE METROPOLIS. . 


i 


BAPnSMa, 


1 BCftlAtS. 


MAmJ- 


i 


Mmlei. 


F<!iii»3et. 


Tola!. 


Mate** 


FemMcA. 


TotiL 




ISO] 


10,327 


10,447 


aO.774 


11.219 


11,154 


S^,379 


9,509 


1802 


11,806 


11,352 


23,a&8 


11,720 


11,38.5 


23,105 


12,171 


1803 


I2,irrl 


12,247 


M,m 


I1,85B 


11,185 


23,043 


11,7»4 


1804 


1%5}B 


12,249 


34»767 


10,083 


9,568 


19,651 


10,772 


1605 


12,055 


12,030 


24,075 


10,744 


10,284 


21,028 


10,330. 


1808 


12,4S6 


12,231 


24,687 


10,204 


9,917 


20,121 


10,483 ; 


1307 


J2/26i 


12,^2 


24,'W 


11,420 


11,121 


22,541 


10,807 


ihm 


12,391 


11,98^ 


24,380 


13,202 


12^01 


24,703 


10,988 


1809 


ly^m 


12,740 


25,J3fi: 


10,578 


9,852 


20,430 


11,216 


1810 

Totals 


12,453 


I2,2ia 


24,671 


12,424 


\%ims 


24,t^2 


U,T25 


»2l,145 


H9,98S 


241,130 


112,452 


109,195 


221,647 


109,774 



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APPENDIX. • " 315 

This summary of the Metropolis is collected 
^ from the regi3ter8 of 86 parishes, within the 
walls of the City of London; from 12 parishes 
without the walls; from 29 out-parishes; and 
from 5 other parishes not included within the 
bills of mortality ; (namely Chelsea, R. ; Ken- 
sington, V. '; St. Mary-le-bone, C. ; Paddington, 
C; andPancras, Y.) in ally from 132 parishes: 
and it is believed that no return whatever re- 
mains due* Sevei^al of the returns mentiop un- 
entered baptisms, burials, and marriages, to the 
following amount, viz. : .* 

Annual average number of imentered bap- 
tisms, 1,345; burials, 5,753; marriages, 27. 



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316 



APPENDIX. 



POPULATION of GREAT BRITAIN, at four 





POPULATION. 




COUNTIES. 


1. 

1700. 


2. 
1750. 


3. 
1801. 


4. 
1811. 




Bedford 


48,500 

74,700 

80,600 

76,000 

107,000 

105,800 

62,300 

93,800 

'248,200 

90,000 

95,500 

159,200 

155,200 

60,900 

32,600 

34,700 

153,800 

166,200 

80,000 

180,000 

624,200 

39,700 

210,200 

119,500 

118,000 

65,200 

79,000 

16,600 

101,600 

195,900 

118,700 


53,900 
92,700 
90,700 
72,000 
131,600 

l85,oqo 

86,900 

109,500 

272,200 

96,400 

135,000 

167,800 

207,800 

74,100 

30.500 

32,500 

190,000 

297,400 

95,000 

160,200 

641,500 

40.600 

215,100 

123,300 

141,700 

77,600 

92,400 

13,800 

130,300 

224,50a 

137,500 


65.500 
112,800 
111,000 

92,300 
198,100 
194,500 
121,100 
166,500 
354,400 
119,100 
165,700 
234,000 
259,100 

92,100 
107,300 

38,800 
317,800 
695,100 
134.400 
215,500 
845,400 

47,100 
282,400 
136,100 
162,300 
145,000 
113,200 

16,900 
172,200 
282,800 

226,900 


72,600 
122,300 
121,600 
104,500 
234,600 
223,900 
138^300 
191.700 
396,100 
128,900 
183,600 
260,900 
295,100 

97,300 
108^700 

43,700 
385,600 
856,000 
155,100 
245,900 
985,100 

64,200 
301,800 
146,100 
177,900 
168,400 
123,200 

17,000 
200.800 
313.800 

253.300 




Berks 




Buckingham 

Cambridge 

Chester ,... 




Cornwall , . 




Cumberland 

Derby 




Devon •«••.«.••... 




Dorset 


» 


Durham 




Essex • 




Gloucester 

Hereford 




Hertford 




Huntingdon 

Kent. 




Lancaster ••••• 




Leicester . • • « 




Lincoln •••••.•• ., 




Middlesex 

Monmouth . • 

Norfolk 




Northampton 

Northumberland .... 

Nottmgham 

Oxford •••••••••••. 




Rutland . . 

Salop, or Shropshire 
Somerset .•.•••.... 




Southampton .. ..; 
(Hampshire) ..|i 




Canied forward 


3,798,500 


4,369,500 


6,22!l»500 


7.121.500 





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' 


^ 






APPBNDIX. 








817 


different Periods in the i8th aqd 19th Centuries. 




N 






















12. 






5. 


6. 


7. 


8. 


9. 


10. 


11. 


ANNUAL PROPORTIONS. 




Area in 
Square 1 
Miles 
^nciiBb.) 


Divisioiial 
Meetings 
of Petty 
Sessions. 


Acting 
County 
Magi- 
strates. ] 


Number 

of 

entire 

Parishes. 


Parts 

of 

Parishes. 


Number 
of 

Popula- 
tion 

Returns, 
1811. 


Number 

of 

Parish 

Re^ster 

Retumsn 

1811. 








{ 


One 
Baptism 

to 
Persons. 


One 

Burial 

to 

Persons. 


One 
Marriage 

to 
Persons. 




430 


5! 


36 


123 


3 


138 


126 


32 


56 


126 




744 


7 ' 


84 


148 


16 


220 


157 


34 


53 


144 




74S 


9 : 


86 


200 


7 


238 


206 


33 


49 


129 




686 


11 


43 


158 


6 


176 


171 


30 


44 


* 127 • 




1,017 


8 


46 


87 


3 


494 


127 


33 


50 


138 




1.407 


15 


83 


212 


2 


217 


205 


32 


62 


141 




1,497 


6 


42 


103 


— 


310 


^ 


35 


54 


138 




1,077 


6 


36 


135 


6 


318 


181 


33 


56 


137 




2,488 


19 


119 


464 


2 


485 


469 


33 


52 


118 


* 


1,129 


8 


41 


270 


2 


328 


262 


35 


57 


135 




1,040 


12 


54 


73 


2 


293 


98 


33 


50 


128 




1,525 


14 


140 


404 


4 


429 


401 


33 


44 


128 




1,122 


14 


96 


335 


7 


452 


328^ 


36 


61 


120 




971 


11 


'61 


213 


12 


272 


225 


36 


58 


150 




602 


7 


56 


32 


4 


256 


331 


.— 


«— 


250 




345 


2 


21 


103 


6 


108 


97 


31 


48 


120 




1,462 


14 


133 


403 


3 


440 


401 


30 


41 


118 




1,806 


13 


90 


68 


2 


467 


187 


29 


48 


108 




8]6 


6 


38 


212 


a 


336 


259 


36 


57 


130 




2,787 


17 


53 


630 


— 


727 


614 


32 


51 


126 




297 


9 


220 


194 


1 


243 


195 


40 


86 


94 




516 


9 


29 


120 


3 


155 


124 


47 


64 


153 




2,013 


33 


130 


722 


3 


752 


692 


30 


50 


128 




965 


7 


43 


301 


6 


343 


293 


35 


52 


133 




1,809 


8 


36 


82 


1 


554 


94 


37 


53 


137 




774 


6 


52^ 


207 


3 


266 


216 


32 


52 


119 




742 


8 


41 


214 


10 


312 


225 


34 


55 


138 




200 


1 


11 


52 


1 


60 


49 


32 


53 


147 




1,403 


13 


58 


206 


21 


386 


228 


36 


57 


143 




1,549 


16 


110 


474 


2 


544 


474 


35 


52 


129 




1,533 


13 


107 


308 


6 


394 


309 


31 


49 

• • • • 


106. 




35,50€ 


i| 332 


2,195 


7,353 


152 


10,563 


7,877 


• • • « 


• • • • 



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318 



AFPBNDIX. 



POPULATION tf GREAT BRITAIN; at fofr 



- 


POPULATION. 




COUNTIES. 


1. 

1700. 


2. 
1750. 


1601. 


4. 
1811. 




Brouf^t forward 
Stafford 


.3,793,500 

117,200 

152,700 

154,900 

91,4K)0 

96,600 

28,600 

153,900 

88,200 

96,200 

98,600 

236,700 


4,369,500 

160,000 
156,800 
207,100 
107,400 
140.000 

36.300 
168,400 
108,000 

85,500 
117,200 
361,500 


6,221,500 

247,100 
217,400 
278,000 
164,600 
215,100 
43.000 
191,200 
143,900 
144,000 
160,500 
582,70a 


7,121,660 

' 304,000 
242,900 
334,700 
196,500 
236.400 
47,500 
200.300 
165,900 
173,000 
157,600 
675,100 




Suffolk 




Surrey •••.. 




Sussex ,, 




Warwick 




Westmoirland 

wats 




Worcester ........ 

Ybrk, East Ridiug . . 
York, North Riding. . 
York, West Riding. . 




England 

Wales 


5,108,500 
366,500 


6,017,700 
449,300 


8,609,000 
559,000 


9,855,400 
632,600 




Scotland 


5,475,000 
1,048,000 


6,467,000 
1,403,000 


9,168,000 
1,652,000 


10,488,000 
1,865,000 




Great Britain . . 


6,523,000 


7,870,000 


10,817,000 


12,353,000 





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APPENDIX. 



- 319 



different Periods in the 18th and Idtb Centuries. 







% . 








^ 




12, 




Area in 

Square 

MUes 

(Englfah.: 


6. 

DiviiioDal 
Meetings 
of Petty 
Sessions. 


7. 

Acting 
County 
Magi- 
strates. 


8. 

^Number 

of 

eiktife 

Parislies. 


9. 

Parts 

•of 

Parishes. 


10. 

Number 

of-. 
Popula- 
tion 
Returns 
1811. 


11. 

Number 

of 

Parish 

Rejrister 

Returns. 

1811. 


|ANNUAI« PROPORTIONS. 




One 
Baptism 

to 
Persons. 


One 
Burial 

to 
Persons. 


One 
Marriage 

to 
Persons. 




35,500 


332 


2,195 


7,353 


152 


10,563 


7,877 


• • • . 


• •• • 


• • • • 




1,196 


8 


60 


132 


13 


361 


178 


32 


52 


121 




1,566 


17 


104 


508 


5 


521 


498 


31 


53 


128 




811 


10 


144 


139 


2 


168 


143 


36 


45 


130 




1,461 


13 


76 


312 


3 


328 


300 


30 


55 


129 




984 


4 


40 


200 


9 


268 


209 


35 


42 


116 




722 


2 


18 


32 


1 


113 63 


31 


54 135 




1,283 


13 


73 


295 


14 


391 307 


35 


54 136 




674 


9 


40. 


167 


7 


252 


197 


32 


52 


132 




1,208 


11 


33 


242 


1 


451 


246 


30 


47 


105 




2,112 


15 


53 


190 


2 


530 


217 


30 


51 


126 




2,633 


11 


59 


198 


5 


674 


278 


31 


51 


123 




50,210 


44^ 


2,895 


9,768 


214 


14,620 


10,818 
846 


33 


49 


120 




8,125 


75 


398 


772 


56 


1,121 


37 


60 


13d 




58,335 


520 


3,293 


10,540 


270 


15,741 


11,159 


34 


50 


122 




29,167 


^Add for Parte of ^ 
Pariihei, Col. ».... J 

Tdal Parwkes..., 

Scotland.. 


184 
















87,502 


10,674 






882 


80 


1,005 


' 












piSX^L'!!!!-!,} 


39 














; 




ToUI Parities.... 


921 












** 



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820 APPENPIX. 



REMARKS. 

Gdamn 5. The English square mile contains 640 statnte 
acres. • ^ ^ 

Scotland (with its islands), is about equal to, Ireland in area, * 

and is half as large as England and Wales. 

Column 7. The justices of peace acting under the commission 
for the Isle of Elv, are included in Cambridsesbire ; and the 
justices acting for the ainstej of the City of York, are included in < * 
the Bast Kiding. One hundeed nmA eighty .thvee cities and ix>wn^ 
ha^e magistrates who lay claim to an exehiiwe jurisdiction ; but 
most 1^ them exercise only a eoncwrrent jurisdiction with the 
county magistrates, and some of them no jurisdiction at all. 

Column 9. The 270 parts of parishes in England and Wales 
produce only 134 parisoes, two parishes extending into three 
counties each ; 80 parts of Parishes in Scotland, produce only 
39 parishes, for a similar reason. 

Column 10. The number of places which separately and dis- 
tinctly levy a rate to maintain tneir own poor is 14,611, accord- 
!pg to the poor return abstract of 1803. 

The number of marriages in Devonshire and Hampshire is con- 
siderably increased by sailors' marriages, which take place at 
Plymouth and Portsmouth : and the proportion of marriages in 
Middlesex is rendered very high by the practice of clandestine 
marriage, whidi is easily accomplished in London. The very 
iow proportion of marriages in Hertfordshire shews that this 
practice extends even to the lower classes in that county. 



Tie First Part o/CORRY'S HISTORY of LANCASHIRE 
wili he published in June, \H^. 

Mr. CORRY is preparing for the Press, CROMWELL ; or, 
THE Adventurer: a TtUe, to be comprised in Three Volumes ^ 
Tn^ves. ' 



THE ENP. 




BABVABD AMD V4BUtY, 

eUmuT'StruttLtudim. 



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