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PRINCETON,  N.  J.  ^ 


BX  7745   .B17  A3  1858 
Backhouse,  Hannah  Chapman 

Gurney,  1787-1850. 
Extracts  from  the  journal 

and  letters  of  Hannah 


EXTRACTS 

FKOJI  THE 

JOURNAL   AND  LETTERS 

OF 

HANNAH  CUArMAN  BACKHOUSE. 


LONDON  : 
nlCHAriD  BAUltKTT,  PRINTER,. 
MARK  LANE. 


EXTRACTS  ^/ 

A?,  fhnl 


FROM  THE 


JOURNAL  AND  LETTERS 


OF 


HANNAH  OHAPMAN  BACKHOUSE. 


"And  they  tbat  bo  wise  sliall  .sliine  as  tlic  briglitiiess  uf  tlie  finiiamoiit  :  aii'l 
tlicy  tbat  tiini  many  to  i-ic-htoonsness  as  tlio  stars  for  ever  anil  ever." 

Dan.  XII.  3. 


MDC'CC'LVIII. 


Digitized  by 

the  Internet  Archive 

in  2015 

https://archive.org/details/extractsfromjourOOback_0 


ERRATA. 


Page  18.  /or  June  3rd,  read  May  ICth. 
„     19.     „         4th,     „  17tli. 

5th,     „  18th. 
6th,     ,,  19th. 
7th,     ,,  20th, 
219.     „  Funeral  of  John  Fell,  read  Funeral  of  Sarah  Armfii'Id. 
243.     ,,  William  Chapman,       ,,    Abel  Chapman.  (Note.) 


CONTENTS. 


CHAPTER  I. 

PAGE. 

Birtli  and  Childhood — Extracts  from  .lonrnal — Early  Tastes — 
Studies — Devotion  to  Mathematics  and  Drawing — Re- 
ligions Impressions— Visit  to  London  and  taste  of  gay 
Life — Her  first  attendance  of  the  Yearly  Meeting  in 
London — Admiration  of  Good  People — Literary  pursuits ...  1 


CHAPTER  II. 

Death  of  her  cousin  Elizabeth  Gurney — Deepening  religious 
convictions — Adoption  of  the  Language  and  Dress  of  a 
Friend — Attends  another  Yearly  Meeting  in  London — 
Her  attachment  to  the  principles  of  Friends  confirmed — 
Her  liappiness  of  mind,  and  interest  in  the  duties  of  life 
— Letter  to  her  Father — Effect  of  the  change  on  her 
intercourse  with  others,  and  on  her  pursuits   18 


CHAPTER  III. 

Marriage — Domestic  Life — Call  to  the  Ministry — Death  of 
her  eldest  child,  and  of  her  sister  Birkbeck — Illness  at 
Peterborough — Her  eai'ly  mental  exercises  and  experience 
— Jonathan  Backhouse  also  a  Minister   34 


VI 


CONTKNTS. 


TAGK. 

CHAPTER  IV. 

Doniostic  Cares — TJcligious  Diitic^ — Illness  of  her  ilusl)an(l — 
Death  of  liov  second  Son — Birth  of  lier  yomip-est — Renc^red 
health — Business  aiTnirs   52 


CHAPTER  y. 

Travels  as  a  ^Minister — In  eonipany  witli  Isaac  Stephenson 
visits  foniilies  in  her  own  Monthly  Meeting,  &c. — With 
her  husband  ^"isits  Essex,  Suffolk,  and  Norfolk — Journey 
into  Devon  and  Cornwall — Visit  to  families  in  Newcastle 
IMonthly  IMeeting,  and  to  Friends  in  Lincolnshire,  Cani- 
hridgeshive  and  Huntingdonshire — Tr(>land    n8 


CHAPTER  VI. 

Prospect  of  a  Religious  Visit  to  North  America  —  Public 
Meetings  in  Durham  and  Northumberland — Voyage  to 
America — New  York  —  Hicksism  —  Philadelpliia  —  Balti- 
more— Visits  families  in  New  York — Thoughts  on  the 
Resurrection — Visits  meetings  in  Philadelphia    71 

CHAPTER  VII. 

Death  of  her  Father — Philadelphia  Yearly  Meeting— Eliza  P. 
Kirkbride — Westown  School — New  York  Yearly  Meeting 
— Frieuds'  Bible  Meeting — Boston — New  Bedford — Nan- 
tucket— Return  to  Pliiladeli)hia — Convention  of  the  Yearly 
Meetings   93 

CHAPTER  VIIT. 

.lom  ney  to  Ohio — Allegliany  Mountains — Oliio  Yearly  Meeting 
— Indiana  Yearly  ]\Ieeting — Laborious  journey  and  re- 
ligious services  within  its  limits — Backwoods  Life — Intense 
cold — BaiJcs  of  the  Wabash — Reflections  on  close  of  1831  107 


CONTENTS. 


VU 


CHAPTER  IX. 

]\l()n;  incetiiiys  and  Fauiiliow  visiUnl  in  Indiana — rrivatioiiti 
and  ])illicnltii's — First-day  Sclioois — Rapid  junrncy  to 
Philadcliilda —  Pliiladclpliia  Yearly  ISIoetiny  —  Jonathan 
J)aekliousL'  returns  to  En<;land   l-ii 


CHAPTER  X. 

Establishes  First-day  Schools  in  Now  England — Nantucket, 
Now  Bedford — Visit  to  an  Indian  L^ettlenient — Jonathan 
Rackhoiise's  return  and  labours — Meeting  with  tlu'  Legis- 
lature   141 

CHAPTER  XI. 

Voyage  up  the  Hudson  River — Enters  Canada — Yonge  Street, 
York — Meeting  with  the  Garrison — E.  P.  Kirkbride's 
illness — ^Norwich — Settlement  of  differences    165 

CHAPTER  XII. 

Meets  her  husband  at  Albany — Philadelphia  Yearly  Meeting — 
Jonathan  Backhouse  attends  that  for  Virginia — Hope  of 
return  lionie  disappointed — Indiana  Yearly  Meeting — 
North  Carolina — Jonathan  Backhouse  returns  to  England 
— South  Carolina — ^Tennessee^ — Kentucky — Cincinnati — 
Ohio  Yearly  Meeting — Liberation — Takes  leave  of  her 
Friends  in  Philadelphia  —  A'oyage  home  —  Arrival  at 
Liverpool    1?5 

CHAPTER  XIII. 

Di'ath  of  her  sister  Barclay — State  of  the  Society — Her  sou 
Henry's  death — Yearly  Meeting  of  183(1 — Visits  Scotland, 
i^c. — Remarks  nu  kee])ing  Anniversaries — Concern  lor 
Norfolk — Letters — Visits  Brighousc  Monthly  Meeting  ...  1[)2 


vm 


CONTENTS. 


CHAPTER  XIV. 

Meetings  witli  the  Nobility — Witli  the  Jews — Norfolk — She 
eonijiletes  her  eiigageiueiit  in  London  anil  its  Neighbour- 
hood— Ilohls  meetings  in  the  East  Riding  of  Yorkshire 
— In  eonipuny  with  her  husband  visits  Cumberland  and 
Northumberland — Scotland — Jonathan  Backhouse's  illness 
at  Monti'osc — Their  Return  home — She  delivers  up  her 
Certificate    211 


CHAPTER  XV. 

Death  of  her  Mother — Letters — Services  in  the  East  Riding  of 

Yorkshire — Her  husband's  death — His  character    234 

CHAPTER  XVI. 

Removal  to  Norwich — Services  in  IMauchester — Attends  London 
and  Dublin  Yearly  Meetings — Wales — Indisposition — 
Return  to  Darlington — Visit  to  families  in  Bristol — To 
the  prisoner  "  Tawell" — Death  of  her  daughter  Ann 
Ilodgkin   253 


CHAPTER  XVII. 


Visits  Meetings  in  Hampshire  and  Dorsetshire — Increased 
Indisposition — Concern  for  Australia — Letters — Evening 
of  Lile— The  Close    277 


JOURNAL  AND  LETTERS 

OF 

HANNAH  C.  BACKHOUSE. 


CHAPTER  I. 

BIRTH  AND  CHILDHOOD  EXTRACTS   FROM   JOURNAL  EARLY  TASTES  

STUDIES  DEVOTION   TO   MATHEMATICS  AND   DRAWING  RELIGIOUS 

IMPRESSIONS  VISIT   TO   LONDON  AND  TASTE   OF   GAY   LIFE  HER 

FIRST  ATTENDANCE  OF  THE  YEARLY  MEETING  IN  LONDON^  ADMI- 
RATION OF  GOOD  PEOPLE  LITERARY  PURSUITS. 

Hannah  Chapman  Backhouse  was  the  daughter  of 
Joseph  and  Jane  Gurnej,  of  Norwich,  and  was  born 
there  on  the  9th  of  the  Second  Month,  1787. 

Almost  from  infancy  she  exhibited  indications  of  no 
common  order  of  mind  ;  a  certain  force  of  character 
distinguished  her  from  other  children.  The  pursuits  of 
her  sisters  possessed  little  or  rio  attraction  for  her ;  but 
to  join  her  brothers  in  their  games  and  recreations,  and 
her  father  in  his  rides,  were  her  chief  enjoyments. 
Throwing  her  whole  soul  with  ardour  into  the  object 
before  her,  she  seldom  failed  to  excel  in  what  she  under- 
took ;  so  great,  indeed,  was  the  absorption  of  mind  in 
her  own  pursuits,  that  it  became  a  source  of  some  trial 
to  her  anxious  mother.  The  same  disposition  rendered 
her  very  independent  of  the  companionship  or  sympathy 
of  those  about  her. 

B 


2 


1804. 


[.*:t.  17. 


We  shall  see  in  the  course  of  the  following  pages,  how, 
when  subjected  to  the  transforming  operations  of  divine 
grace,  the  elements  of  her  naturally  powerful  character 
combined  to  render  her  an  honoured  instrument  in  the 
hand  of  her  God  and  Saviour,  to  whose  service  she  was 
concerned  that  every  faculty  should  bow,  and  before 
whose  throne  she  desired  to  cast  every  crown. 

When  about  seventeen,  she  began  to  keep  a  very 
simple  journal  of  her  pursuits  and  interests.  In  an 
introduction  to  it  she  takes  a  brief  review  of  her  pre- 
vious life  : — 

I  was  born  of  parents  possessing  many  virtues,  especially 
that  of  so  loving  their  children,  tliat  while  giving  them  every 
indulgence  proper  for  them,  they  did  not  withhold  salutary 
punishments.    *    *    *  * 

My  father  had  a  country-house,  where  we  used  to  spend 
the  summer.  The  greatest  pleasure  I  remember  to  have  felt 
was  that  of  riding  in  the  whiskey  with  my  parents,  and 
opening  the  gates ;  which  if  I  was  deprived  of,  I  used  to  cry 
vociferously.  "When  about  four  years  old,  we  removed  to 
the  Grove.*  In  the  summer,  we  went  to  the  sea-side  at 
Cromer. 

What  I  felt  of  the  most  importance  was  using  the  hammer 
and  saw  with  dexterity,  and  the  greatest  pleasure  being 
victorious  in  a  game  of  trap-ball.  I  disliked  anything  like  a 
book  ;  but  in  1800  I  began  to  feel  that  vacancy  of  mind  and 
want  of  employment  which  are  great  enemies  to  happiness. 

In  1802,  we  took  a  journey  into  the  North,  which  I  enjoyed 
very  much.  When  I  came  home  I  really  set  about  working 
hard.  I  began  Italian,  divided  my  time  so  as  to  know  the 
work  of  each  hour,  and  took  notice  of  those  five  minutes 
which,  when  summed  up,  amount  to  a  great  deal.  In  the 
spring  of  1803,  I  began  geometry ;  and  I  think  (whether  it 
be  conceit  or  not  I  cannot  tell)  ever  since  I  entered  into  the 
spirit  of  it  I  have  felt  more  capable  of  accurate  reasoning;  or, 

*  A  country-house  at  a  short  distance  from  Norwich,  which  wa-s 
thenceforth  the  residence  of  her  parents  till  their  death. 


M-t.  17.] 


1804. 


3 


indeed^  of  reasoning  at  all.  I  had  a  few  lessons  in  drawing, 
which  I  began  to  be  very  fond  of. 

At  Croraer,  with  a  party  consisting  of  Hoares,  Kctts, 
Barclays,  and  Gurneys,  we  did  everything  that  could  be 
thought  of  to  produce  pleasure :  riding,  walking,  laughing, 
talking.  How  far  our  strenuous  efforts  succeeded,  I  cannot 
quite  determine ;  in  reality,  I  believe  they  did  not ;  however, 
I  began  to  feel  a  great  love  for  society,  "When  we  came 
home,  I  again  set  hard  to  work,  and  never  since  I  can  re- 
member did  I  enjoy  so  much  happiness.  But  it  was  now  that 
I  was  to  taste  great  sorrow ;  for  my  dear  sister  Mary  died ; — 
never  shall  I  forget  the  time — what  I  felt  is  indescribable. 
After  a  fortnight,  in  which  I  endured  torturing  anxiety,  she 
expired.  At  that  time  I  almost  believed  that  happiness  was 
banished  from  me  for  ever :  but  the  human  mind  will  not 
long,  I  believe,  be  put  out  of  its  usual  course ;  and  how  happy 
it  is  that  it  is  so,  for  life  could  not  long  be  supported  under 
violent  grief.  I  think  this  affliction  taught  me  one  thing — 
that  I  was  not  so  insensible  as  I  before  supposed.  Perhaps 
it  has  made  me  feel  for  others. 

With  the  hope  that  this  record  of  her  time  and 
thoughts  might  be  accurate  and  impartial,  she  writes : — 

March  11th. — Resolved  to  be  industrious,  and  get  up  in 
the  morning,  and  knock  Latin  into  me,  as  almost  every  other 
hour  in  the  week  is  employed. 

Saturday. — A  capital  lesson  in  mathematics. 

Monday. — Had  a  very  pleasant  day  at  Earlham,  were  it 
not  for  being  severely  reprimanded  on  my  return  for  leaving 
mamma,  who  was  ill,  though  recovering.  I  felt  it  the  more 
because  I  deserved  it. 

Saturday. — Spent  the  afternoon  with  Jane  C  on  the 

drawing-room  sofa  ;  she  telling  me  a  great  deal  of  the  world 
and  its  wickedness,  of  which  I  scarcely  knew  anything.  It 
made  me  thankful  that  I  was  born  of  such  parents,  and  that 
for  our  intimate  acquaintance  we. have  those  who  are,  I  think, 
better  than  most. 

I  cannot  help  observing  how,  in  any  particular  circumstance 
of  my  life,  the  idea  of  immortality  comes  forcibly  upon  me. 

B  2 


4 


1804. 


[.ET.  17. 


To-day,  in  partiug  with  the  C  s  with  the  greatest  proba- 
bility of  never  meeting  again,  is  there  not  a  something  that 
makes  one  feel  it  is  not  to  be  an  eternal  separation  ?  It  seems 
but  a  day  since  they  came,  and  now  they  are  gone ;  a  few 
more  and  this  busy  life  will  be  over,  and  then  I  firmly  believe 
the  good  we  love  here  will  be  restored  to  us  in  tenfold  measure 
for  eternity. 

Saturday. — Went  to  St.  Andrew's  Hall  to  meet  Cotman ; 
looked  over  his  sketches,  which,  though  very  beautiful,  I  did 
not  feel  it  was  out  of  my  power  in  time  to  equal.  Had  a  very 
pleasant  ride  home  with  my  father.  How  I  do  enjoy  talking 
with  him  ! 

Sunday. — My  uncle  C  's  being  here  this  Meek  has  made 

me  pant  after  seeing  a  great  deal  of  gay  life  for  a  short  time  ; 
though  the  more  I  see  of  it,  the  less  I  shovdd  like  it  for  a 
continuance  ;  for  I  think  all  real  happiness  consists  in  making 
"  my  mind  to  me  a  kingdom,"  and  being  in  the  good  conver- 
sational company  of  those  I  love. 

Sunday,  September  9th. — Had  a  charming  ride  to  North 
Walsham  meeting,  reading  Dr.  Dodd,  and  resolved  to  become 
more  diligent  in  my  duty  towards  God ;  for  every  day  I  see 
nothing  else  will  make  us  permanently  happy,  and  thorough 
self-examination  I  find  to  be  very  necessary,  as  I  really  know 
nothing  of  myself, — the  most  important  of  all  knowledge. 

Friday. — I  had  a  delightful  hour,  reading  Locke.  How  I 
now  and  then,  perhaps  rather  too  often,  enjoy  solitude  !  I 
begin  to  fear  that  this  power  of  enjoying  myself  makes  my 
pleasure  too  independent  of  others,  and  consequently  renders 
me  too  little  solicitous  about  theirs.  I  do  not  think  this  is 
for  my  good,  as  I  believe  the  greatest  earthly  happiness  is 
reflected. 

Sunday. — A  delightful  ride  with  Joseph,  on  horseback ; 
fixed  plans  of  spending  my  time  at  the  Grove — all,  I  hope, 
subservient  to  the  great  future  good ;  believing  that  in  time, 
with  the  grace  of  God,  I  could  be  brought  to  feel  the  world 
only  as  a  state  of  probation,  and  look  doM  n  upon  it  with  no 
concern  about  it,  excepting  as  it  may  tend  to  the  attainment 
of  everlasting  bliss.  How  infiiiitely  superior  to  all  other 
pleasures  is  one  truly  religious  feeling,  and  I  can  imagine  no 
bliss  so  great  as  that  which  is  an  infinite  increase  of 


.'■ET.  17.] 


1804. 


5 


To  know  God  and  His  only  begotten  Son, — would  not  this 
be  sufficient  to  form  heaven  ? 

Friday. — Drew  again  the  old  man  (a  figure  of  a  hedger). 

Sahirday. — Finished  it,  which  I  did  so  well  that  I  felt  most 
uncomfortably  elated  with  it,  as  I  was  self-conceited  beyond 
measure,  and  did  nothing  but  fancy  I  should  be  a  great  artist. 
How  I  disliked  myself,  and  could  not  but  reflect  how  diff'er- 
ently  a  great  mind  would  have  felt,  which,  instead  of  being 
blind  to  the  imperfections,  would  have  discovered  so  many  as  to 
make  it  humble.  I  strove  much  against  my  feelings,  which 
I  hope  in  measure  I  subdued.  This  week  I  have  found  great 
pleasure  in  reading  the  Bible  before  going  to  bed. 

Sunday. — Like  a  fool  I  did  nothing  at  meeting  but  dream 
about  being  an  artist ;  vexed  that  I  have  not  the  power  of 
keeping  my  thoughts  from  wandering. 

October  lith. — How  desirable  it  is  to  cultivate  cheer- 
fulness !  How  unjust  it  is  for  me  to  murmur  at  anything, 
who  am  surrounded  with  innumerable  blessings  !  and  if  I 
have  not  my  heart's  desire  in  everything,  ought  I  not  to 
be  thankful  for  it  ?  or  else  I  should  be  still  less  than  I  am, 
inclined  to  look  forward  for  bliss.  How  I  wish  to  cultivate  a 
grateful  heart,  without  which  all  blessings  bestowed  are  vain  ! 

Sunday. —   and  to  tea.    My  reflection  on  the 

evening  was — Can  these  be  immortal  souls  ?  What  a  great 
increase  of  happiness  there  would  be  if  conversation  were 
composed  of  better  materials  than  it  is  ! 

A  most  delightful  intimate  ride  with  Hannah  Chapman. 
She  in  the  true  spirit  of  a  real  friend  told  me  of  my  faults, 
which  I  owned.  What  I  want  is  that  true  humility  that 
would  make  me  less  to  live  for  myself.  How  I  love  her  for 
her  reproofs  !  At  home  in  good  time.  Little  dear  Emma, 
and  all  of  them,  seemed  really  glad  at  my  return,  which  gave 
me  heartfelt  pleasure. 

Saturday. — My  thoughts  have  been  during  this  week  one 
continued  castle  in  the  air — of  being  an  artist ;  the  only  reality 
they  M'Cre  built  on,  was,  having  painted  Kachel  in  oils  better 
than  I  thought  I  could  do — a  feeling  that  I  shall  in  a  little 
time  succeed,  and  an  unbounded  ambition  to  do  so.  I  have 
had  many  arguments  with  myself  to  know  if  it  would  be  right. 
1  think  it  would  be  so,  if  I  make  good  use  of  it.    Have  warned 


6 


1805. 


[.ET.  18. 


myself  against  conceit  and  confidence^  which  I  felt  two  great 
evils  likely  to  beset  me. 

Monday. — E.ode  to  Stoke  with  my  father,  in  which  I  took 
up  the  cross ;  as  painting  a  portrait  of  Guyton  was  first  in 
my  affections. 

Saturday. — The  love  of  painting  has  been  uppermost  in  my 
mind  for  some  weeks  past ;  I  hope  it  will  soon  settle 
into  its  proper  station  there.  Mamma  has  wanted  me  to 
give  it  up  on  account  of  the  dirt  it  makes  on  me  and 
the  house ;  my  father,  because  he  feai's  it  will  take  the  place 
of  better  objects.  Opposition  has  only  given  me  the  greater 
love  for  it.  Both  of  them^  on  review  of  Guyton,  seemed 
tacitly  to  yield,  and  my  ever  kind  and  good  father  has  ordered 
a  stove  in  the  boys'  tool-house,  where  I  am  to  unfold  my 
talents  (if  I  have  any)  without  interruption,  and  in  that  most 
auspicious  region  for  such  things,  silence.  Few  things  have 
given  me  so  much  pleasure  for  a  long  time.  I  imagine  that 
even  in  real  good  it  will  not  be  fruitless. 

Sunday. — Did  nothing  but  dream  of  being  very  gay  in 
London  for  a  month.  My  ambition  is  to  see  what  the 
fashionable  part  of  the  world  is,  as  it  may  be  of  use  to  my 
most  awkward  manners. 

June  9th,  1805.  —  Came  from  London  last  Saturday 
week.  The  first  fortnight  there  was  passed  with  papa  and 
mamma  in  visiting  relations,  and  seeing  sights.  They  then  left 
me  at  St.  Thomas's*  to  the  wide  world.  I  went  to  Carshalton, 
then  to  Bury  Hill.  From  thence  I  wrote  to  my  father  and 
mother,  requesting  their  permission  to  go  to  public  places ;  to 
which  I  received  a  most  charming  refusal  from  my  father, 
afterwards  from  mamma.  Went  to  Mrs.  Birmester's  concert, 
and  the  Duchess  of  Chandos's  party.  This  was  my  first  taste 
of  the  gay  world, — may  I  not  like  its  savour  too  well  for  my 

good  !    At  Mrs.  B  's  we  saw  the  great  people  of  the  city  ; 

at  the  duchess's,  those  of  the  west  end  of  the  town.  Went 
with  Agatha  to  the  Yearly  Meeting ;  its  effect  was  quieting 
after  the  bustle  I  had  been  in  ;  it  was  not  nearly  so  disagree- 
able as  I  expected.  The  contrast  was  great  of  the  Friends' 
manners  with  those  I  had  been  accustomed  to  at  Woodford  ; 

*  St.  Thomas's  Hospital,  of  which  her  uncle  Abel  Chapman  was 
resident  Treasurer. 


.«T.  18.] 


1805. 


7 


but  it  gave  me  the  opportunity  of  seeing  different  circles  in 
the  world.  The  purity  of  the  Quaker  mind  was  not  a  little 
striking.  I  heard  a  sermon  which  I  wish  I  may  never  forget. 
[  am  now  at  home,  and  the  intoxicating  delight  of  first 
getting  there  I  cannot  describe. 

July. — Since  I  have  come  from  town  we  have  been  much 
occupied  with  one  thing  and  another.  At  this  time,  for 
almost  the  first  in  my  life,  I  seem  to  come  to  a  stand  in  my 
darling  objects,  which  I  may  say  have  been  almost  entirely 
the  pursuit  of  pleasure  through  the  medium  of  the  under- 
standing. This  I  feel  must  be  a  useless  search ;  for  the  further 
I  go,  the  more  unattainable  is  the  contentment  which  I  hoped 
that  a  degree  of  excellence  might  have  produced;  the  further 
I  go,  the  further  does  my  idea  of  perfection  extend  ;  therefore 
this  way  of  attaining  happiness  I  find  is  impossible.  In  seek- 
ing for  it  in  the  pleasures  of  sense — which  is  in  reality  the 
meaning  of  the  pleasures  of  the  world,  (fame  perhaps  excepted) 
— though  I  have  just  put  the  cup  to  my  lips,  and  found  the 
taste  most  alluring,  yet  knowing  the  bitterness,  or  at  best  the 
perfect  vanity,  that  must  follow  the  indulgence  of  such  pur- 
suits, I  trust  no  temptations  will  ever  induce  me  to  follow 
this  road  to  destruction.  Never  in  my  life  was  I  so  sensible 
of  the  real  weakness  of  man,  though  to  all  appearance  so 
strong ;  for  I  am  persuaded  that  it  is  almost  impossible  to 
conduct  oneself  through  this  world  without  being  sincerely 
religious  ;  for  the  human  mind  must  have  an  object,  and  let 
that  object  be  the  attainment  of  eternal  happiness.  I  felt 
that  the  actions  of  almost  every  moment  may  tend  to  it ; 
every  other  object  in  life  may  fill  up  portions  of  time;  but 
worldly  objects,  as  many  as  a  man  can  grasp  (and  many  he  has 
not  power  for)  must  leave  much  time  in  which  the  mind  can 
have  no  employment.  That  we  shall  have  the  same  faculties 
for  partaking  of  happiness  or  misery  to  all  eternity  I  doubt 
not.  What  then  must  be  the  state  of  a  mind  quitting  this 
world,  if  its  objects  of  desire  have  been  those  only  of  time,  and 
which  must  perish  with  time  ?  After  such  considerations,  can 
I  be  so  weak  as  not  to  make  religion  my  only  pursuit  ? — that 
which  will,  I  believe,  bring  my  mind  into  beautiful  order,  and, 
rendering  worldly  objects  subservient  to  its  use,  harmonize  the 
whole,  and  fit  it  to  bear  fruit  to  all  eternity. 


8  1806.  [^T.  19. 

H.  C.  Gurney  occasionally  mentions  her  father  in  a 
manner  that  evinces  his  increasino;  love  to  the  cause  of 
Christ,  and  his  growing  attachment  to  the  principles  and 
practices  of  the  religious  Society  of  which  he  was  a 
member.  About  this  time  he  first  spoke  in  their  meet- 
ings as  a  minister,  in  which  character  he  became  much 
esteemed,  and  was  a  bright  example  of  Christian  ex- 
cellence. 

September  9th. — Yesterday,  Maria  Barclay  left  us.  I 
love  her  warmly,  yet  soberly,  and  I  am  sure  it  is  sincere. 
I  am  convinced  that  the  more  really  good  I  am,  the  more  she 
will  like  me.  How  different  is  this  from  being  loved  for  one's 
follies  !  I  admire  her  wish  to  be  good,  and  should  not  be 
surprised  to  see  her  one  day  an  eminently  religious  character. 

October. — On  Tuesday,  we  called  on   s  to  fix  their 

coming.  What  dull  worldly  people  they  seem  to  be  !  Having 
done  nothing  all  day,  and  being  all  assembled  in  the  evening, 
vacancy  pervaded  the  whole  room  to  such  a  degree,  that  I 
wished  I  had  been  obliged  to  work  for  my  bread,  that  my 
duty  might  not  lie  in  the  listless  inactivity  of  a  parlour. 

Sunday. — The  s  came  to  tea.    I  got  scolded  for  being 

proudly  silent,  which  I  hope  is  not  entirely  true :  yet  I  fear 
that  foolish  demon  pride  does  sadly  torment  me  ;  endeavour 
to  mortify  it  as  I  may,  it  is  not  subdued,  and  until  I  have  a 
different  heart,  I  fear  it  will  not  be. 

I  shall  now  endeavour  to  give  as  accurate  an  account  of 
myself  as  I  can,  at  the  age  of  nineteen, — March  1806. 

As  to  externals  I  am  improved,  which  I  wish  to  persuade 
myself  is  from  attending  to  what  mamma  desires;  but  fear  the 
most  powerful  motive  is  my  love  of  pleasing  those  who  look 
at  little  but  the  outside. 

In  the  company  of  people  who  are  worshippers  of  the 
god  of  this  world  my  heart  too  often  joins  with  them  ;  but  for 
those  who  are  weaned  from  it  I  feel  the  most  sincere  love  and 
almost  veneration,  with  real  regret  that  I  am  not  so  good  as 
they  are.  I  often  long  to  be  so,  but  have  not  resolution  to 
say  in  the  sincerity  of  my  heart,  "  Thy  will  be  done."  If  I 
could  entirely  resign  mv  own  will,  I  should  be  so  dependent 


MT.  19.]  1806.  9 

upon  a  better  that  it  would  keep  me  in  a  continual  watchful- 
ness, preserve  the  mind  in  an  even  tcmpei",  and  he  my 
tjreatest  guard  against  yielding  to  temptation ;  but  I  have 
never  yet  been  able  to  do  this,  dreading,  like  a  real  coward, 
tlie  painful  proof  of  my  sincerity,  though  knowing  that  the 
reward  is  quietness  and  assurance  for  ever. 

I  give  up  my  time  if  I  think  I  can  be  of  any  use  to  any 
one,  though  it  is  sometimes  a  cross  to  leave  my  pursuits ;  I 
endeavour  to  bear  patiently  what  crosses  my  inclination, 
guard  against  being  out  of  temper,  begin  to  watch  over  my 
words,  and  try  to  be  attentive  to  my  father  and  mother. 

Sunday. — Alone.  Made  Rachel  happy  by  being  very  kind 
to  her  about  her  journal.  By  her  affection  for  me  how  well 
am  I  recompensed, — what  an  encouragement  to  go  on  !  I 
often  tremble  at  the  influence  that  the  eldest  has  in  a  family; 
and  how  earnestly  do  I  wish  mine  may  be  a  good  one  ! 

Wednesdat/. — We  had  a  pleasant  evening  with  Ann  Crowley 
and  Susanna  Home  [then  on  a  religious  visit  to  Norwich]. 
I  do  believe  that  Friends  are  the  happiest  people  on  the 
earth,  and  they  do  more  than  half  persuade  me  that  if  ever  I 
would  enjoy  that  peace  and  assurance  of  mind  that  I  long  for, 
I  must  seek  it  in  the  path  which  they  have  trod. 

Friday  and  Saturday. — Very  pleasant.  What  a  vile 
uncentred  state  I  am  in  now  ! — even  a  novel  that  I  have  read 
this  week  unsettled  the  weathercock  of  my  mind.  My 
thoughts  run  upon  the  gay  world.  The  plea  to  myself  is,  that 
I  wish  to  see  and  know  the  world,  and  to  feel  from  my  own 
experience  that  its  joys  are  incapable  of  making  me  happy, 
and  that  they  are  diametrically  opposite  to  what  a  Christian 
should  seek  after.  This  is  plausible ;  but  I  fear  the  true 
reason  is,  that  a  mind  not  at  peace  longs  for  the  dissipation  of 
vain  society  to  drive  it  from  itself 

Wednesday. — This  day  ushered  me  into  the  Yearly  Meeting; 
dined  at  Joseph  Smith's ;  his  wife  is  a  most  sweet  woman.  A 
number  of  Friends  of  the  strictest  order  were  there.  I  felt 
most  awkward,  for  I  did  not  know  one,  and  being  so  unaccus- 
tomed to  be  the  gayest  in  a  party  added  to  my  confusion,  for 
I  imagined  every  one  looked  upon  me  as  a  heretic. 

TJmrsday. — A  long  meeting  in  the  morning.  At  dinner 
met  some  Friends  with  Cousin  Priscilla  H.  Gurney  and 


10  1806.  [^T.  19. 

Rachel  Fowler,  two  of  the  sweetest  women  in  appearance  I 
ever  knew.  Deborah  Darby  and  her  friend,  with  S.  Cockfield 
and  E.  Sheppard,  were  of  the  party.  The  quiet  of  meeting 
in  the  afternoon  I  enjoyed. 

Monday. — The  meetings  most  interesting.  Altogether  a 
very  happy  day. 

Friday. — Dined  at  George  Stacey's :  after  the  ice  was 
broken,  which  among  Friends  is  very  thick,  I  enjoyed  the 
dinner.  His  wife,  the  most  agreeable  of  the  party,  soon  left 
us  for  a  Committee,  and  we  killed  an  hour  or  two  very  badly 
before  meeting.  Had  a  most  interesting  meeting,  and  it  was 
the  final  one.  I  have  attended  all  the  meetings,  and  really 
enjoyed  almost  all.  I  went  because  my  parents  wished  me 
to  do  so.  That  it  has  done  me  much  good  I  do  not  think, 
but  it  has  certainly  increased  my  admiration,  and  perhaps 
love,  for  the  Society, — not  so  much  from  what  I  heard,  though 
that  was  very  excellent ;  but  seeing  such  first-rate  good  people, 
and  the  happy  state  of  mind  they  seemed  to  enjoy,  made  me 
earnestly  desire  to  be  like  them,  though  it  has  not  yet  per- 
suaded me  to  endeavour  to  be  so  :  if  I  had  a  wish  that  could 
be  granted,  it  would  be  that  my  last  end  would  be  like  unto 
theirs,  I  saw  the  most  eminently  sweet  angelic  woman  I  ever 
beheld, — Mary  Capper  j  her  countenance  expressed  the  beauty 
of  the  human  mind  when  it  is  without  weeds. 

June. — In  the  afternoon  our  party  set  out  for  Windsor  in 
two  postchaises.  After  tea  we  went  on  to  the  Terrace,  where 
we  had  a  good  opportunity  of  staring  at  those  astonishing 
human  beings,  the  King,  Queen,  and  three  Princesses.  Tlie 
whole  scene  was  amusing.  The  sight  of  a  number  of  people, 
who  looked  as  if  they  came  with  full  hopes  and  expectations 
that  all  the  pains  they  had  taken  about  their  dress  would  be 
rewarded  by  the  gratification  of  seeing  themselves  shining 
among  the  crowd,  and  who,  after  all,  found  themselves 
jostled  and  totally  neglected,  was  an  instructive  lesson, 
showing  the  infinite  disproportion  between  the  value  and 
consequence  we  affix  to  ourselves,  and  that  which  the  world 
attaches  to  us. 

August. — One  structure  of  ambition  has  vanished  to  make 
way  for  another.  The  first  I  can  remember  distinctly  was 
founded  on  a  love  of  riding  and  driving  ;  then  the  completion 


^T.  19.] 


1806. 


11 


of  my  wishes  would  have  been  to  have  horses  and  carriages 
at  my  command,  and  the  dreaming  of  the  eujoyment  I 
should  have  in  them  employed  the  thoughts  of  many  hours. 
The  next  mania  that  seized  me  was  a  passion  for  being- 
thought  learned,  and  for  this  purpose  how  many  books  did 
I  devour  !  Next  succeeded  mathematics,  which  lasted  for 
some  time,  and  many  were  the  castles  which  I  built  upon 
the  fame  which  I  expected  to  acquire  by  discoveries  in  this 
science ;  but  what  foundation  had  I  for  these  castles  ?  This 
passion  retired  at  the  entrance  of  that  for  painting.  As  I 
have  not  long  taken  my  leave  of  this  object,  I  have  clearly 
in  my  remembrance  how  towering  were  my  imaginations 
this  way ;  what  structures,  with  the  help  of  fancy,  hope,  and 
ambition,  I  built  at  this  period  :  they  are  vanished,  and  three 
or  four  wearied  pieces  of  canvass  remain  to  be  a  sorry 
spectacle  of  the  result  of  my  folly.  Ambition,  I  believe,  still 
hovers  about  me,  marking  me  for  its  prey ;  but,  as  it  wears 
no  embodied  form,  I  do  not  often  feel  its  grasp. 

Last  week  poor  Joseph  was  ill  with  a  sore-throat ;  I  was 
more  attentive  than  on  such  occasions  I  usually  am,  and  I 
do  not  think  I  lost  my  reward,  for  I  was  conscious  of  doing 
my  duty,  at  least  in  part  ;  but  I  often  felt  my  aversion  to 
the  weariness  of  a  sick-room  ;  the  constant  attention  to  trifles, 
and  the  want  of  employment  and  ideas,  made  me  feel  it  a 
great  cross ;  this  sometimes  overcame  me.  Beginning  to  act 
from  duty  in  such  cases,  one  may  end  by  acting  from  affec- 
tion, and  then  it  becomes  necessary  to  one's  satisfaction  to 
do  so.  A  woman  who  cannot  suffer  the  confinement  of  a 
sick-room,  leaves  unfulfilled  one  of  her  most  marked  duties, 
and  can  never  be  fit  for  a  wife.  It  is  a  difficult  task  when 
one  is  not  spurred  onward  by  the  continual  impulse  of  the 
lieart,  or,  in  short,  when  self  is  a  dearer  object  than  the 
invalid.  When  alarmed  by  danger,  few  are  so  indifferent 
as  not  to  desire  to  use  all  their  powers ;  but  when  it  is  only 
pain  or  sickness,  I  could  often  wish  my  heart  were  more 
susceptible  of  kindness  and  compassion  than  it  is. 

Monday. — In  the  morning  Anna  gave  me  a  letter  contain- 
ing a  particular  account  of  the  death  of  Miss  Dumbleton. 
I  felt  truly  affected  by  it,  and  could  almost  have  cried  over 
it :  it  made  me  very  serious ;  and  how  earnestly  did  I  desire 


1H06. 


L-CT.  19. 


to  be  for  ever  in  tlic  company  of  tlie  just  of  all  ages.  T  liavc 
often  felt  my  heart  very  much  softened  of  late,  and  more  and 
more  see  the  beauty  of  holiness ;  but  all  the  progress  I  can 
say  I  have  made  towards  it,  is  in  loving  it  more  ;  yet  I  feel  I 
have  a  great  way  to  go  before  I  am  entirely  given  up,  or  till 
I  can  in  singleness  of  heart  follow  after  it.  I  have  been 
afraid,  that  as  goodness  is  what  I  love  people  for,  I  may  wish 
to  be  valued  by  them  for  what  I  really  have  not,  .but  only 
desire  to  have ;  and  am  thus  tempted  to  be  an  hypocrite,  of 
which  I  have  the  greatest  horror,  and  would  often  hide  what 
is  good  in  me  rather  than  be  praised  for  it.  But  so  deceitful 
is  the  heart  of  man,  that  I  have  often  caught  myself  wishing 
that  no  good  action  or  word  should  be  unperceived  by  those 
I  love. 

On  Sunday  we  had  a  very  pleasant  ride  to  North  Walshara 
with  cousin  Henrietta,  talking  of  our  ancestors  and  their 
characters,  for  which  I  felt  a  great  veneration,  and  an  affec- 
tion for  those  who  had  lived  the  life  of  the  righteous,  though 
I  had  never  seen  them ;  which  made  me  wish  I  might  ever  be 
entitled  to  the  same  feeling  from  succeeding  generations. 
Those  who  have  not  left  behind  them  a  character  for  being 
devoted  to  the  acquisition  of  the  one  thing  needful,  even  if 
their  faculties  were  above  par,  seem  like  a  shadow  that  is 
gone ;  but  others,  as  if  there  were  a  substance  that  yet  remains. 

Till  Wednesday  we  were  quite  alone.  Outward  quietness 
and  industry  are  means  of  composure  which  do  not  always 
succeed,  but  for  this  time  they  have  done  so  very  well.  Tlie 
moonlight  evenings  were  sweet,  and  few  dull  hours  were  my 
lot — many  happy  ones,  and  some  discomposed.  I  forget  if 
it  was  this  week  or  last  that  I  finished  reading  the  bible 
through, — I  have  always  endeavoured  to  read  it  before  break- 
fast, or  directly  afterwards.  It  has  been  a  pleasure  to  me, 
in  that  I  have  often  been  made  to  feel  the  beauty  of  holiness  ; 
but,  as  a  rule  to  measure  myself  by,  it  has  often  shown  me 
how  far  I  am  from  what  I  should  be.  I  have  often  wished 
my  heart  could  join  in  parts  of  it.  I  have  seen  what  a  sweet 
friend  and  comforter  it  must  be  to  a  sincere  and  upright 
heart. 

Friday. — In  the  evening,  owing  to  nay  father's  obliging  us 
to  come  in  sooner  than  I  liked,  I  fell  into  a  sulky  mood  in 


20.] 


1807. 


13 


my  own  mind,  growling  over  the  misery  of  parental  restraint. 
I  sometimes  feel  my  want  of  freedom  rather  galling  :  but 
how  much  better  is  it  for  me  ;  for  when  I  have  a  little,  there 
is  nothing  to  stop  it.  Had  I  now  much  liberty,  my  high- 
spirited  and  ambitious  disposition  would  drown  everything 
else  in  me. 

December  24ith,  1806. — Went  to  see  Louisa*  married 
at  Tasborougli — the  most  deeply  affecting  and  interesting 
meeting  I  ever  was  at.  I  wished,  if  ever  I  was  married,  1 
might  have  such  an  one.  Came  home,  dressed,  and  went 
to  dinner  at  Earlham.  I  felt  in  one  of  the  most  solemn 
minds,  nor  did  the  presence  of  numbers  drive  it  fx'om  me. 
What  an  unmerited  blessing  it  is  to  feel  in  this  way ! — I 
believe  these  are  the  moments  which  are  only  truly  enjoyed. 
Dear  Louisa  !  how  sincerely  I  wished  her  the  best  good. 

Saturday. — Alone,  very  silent,  for  which  I  am  blamed  : 
but  I  cannot  bear  talking  about  trifles  when  there  is  no 
positive  occasion — and  I  love  silence. 

Mondaxj. — I  have  this  week  made  many  resolutions  of 
improvement  in  secondary  as  well  as  better  things,  and  some 
efforts  too ;  which,  though  attended  with  tolerable  success, 
make  me  feel  what  a  great  deal  there  is  to  reprehend  in  me. 
Would  I  were  truly  humble  !  To  keep  a  watch  over  my 
mouth  has  been  my  most  earnest  desire ;  for  this  I  have 
written  many  maxims.  I  have  determined  not  to  use  the 
words  "  genteel "  and  "  vulgar,"  or  the  like,  as  a  measure  for 
actions,  believing  them  to  be  rooted  in  pride.  ^ 

February  9th,  1807. — To-day  I  am  twenty.  And  now  let 
me  endeavour  to  describe  what  twenty  years  have  effected 
upon  me.  How  difficult  self-love  and  blindness  make 
answering  the  question,  What  am  I  ?  How  often  do  I  feel 
myself  double-minded,  and  how  seldom  have  I  that  single- 
ness of  heart  which  is  indeed  acceptable  !  Often,  when 
clothed  with  something  of  heavenly  love,  do  I  feel  that  "  I 
had  rather  be  a  doorkeeper  in  the  house  of  my  God  than 
dwell  in  "  kings'  palaces ;  but  I  fear  the  general  tendency  of 
my  pursuits  would  make  me  more  fit  for  the  latter  than  the 
former ;  yet  I  hope  I  may  be  allowed  the  encouragement  of 

*  Louisa  Gvu'iiey,  who  was  mari-ied  to  Samuel  Hoare. 


U  1807.  [^T.  20. 

thinking  that  I  am  increasingly  inclined  to  sacrifice  the  last 
to  the  first. 

Lacking  so  much,  how  is  it  possible  I  should  be  puffed 
up  ?  but  in  what  corner  of  the  mind  does  not  Satan  lurk  ? 
What  I  most  want,  and  most  sincerely  wish  for,  is,  that  I 
may  be  truly  humble — that  where  pride  now  reigns,  humility 
may  prevail,  and  where  ambition,  contentment. 

In  moral  duties  I  hope  I  am  improved,  and  when  they 
come  in  the  balance  with  self-indulgence  I  think  they  gene- 
rally preponderate ;  but  I  want  more  of  active  kindness  in 
my  own  family.  In  forbearance  I  think  I  am  not  deficient. 
As  to  learning  and  accomplishments,  I  have  been  industrious 
in  that  way ;  but  the  older  I  grow,  the  more  these  things 
retreat  into  the  background  of  my  affections. 

March,  Wednesday . — Cotman  came  in  the  morning  :  he 
gave  me  much  encouragement  about  my  drawing,  which  led 
me  farther  than  I  wished  from  humility. 

June,  Tuesday. — In  the  morning,  in  very  ill  humour,  find- 
ing mamma  had  prevented  my  meeting  a  party  at  Earlham. 
How  painfully  sensitive  am  I  to  not  being  free  to  act  as  I 
like,  though  I  have  often  experienced  how  little  it  is  for  my 
happiness, 

Thursday. — My  father  drove  me  to  Coteshall,  and  left  me 
there. 

Saturday. — I  have  enjoyed  this  visit  much,  but  felt  iincom- 
fortable  at  being  loved  and  admired  more  than  I  could  return. 
I  do  not  think  I  once  professed  anything  T  did  not  feel,  which 
I  am  glad  of.  I  hope  never  again  to  fall  into  the  error  of 
belying  my  feelings  towards  people  or  things.  How  soon  one 
is  wearied  of  the  constant  exertion  to  be  agreeable,  even 
when  conscious  of  admiration !  the  rest  of  home  was  truly 
grateful  to  me,  though  all  consciousness  of  being  admired 
there  must  cease.  The  atmosphere  of  truth  is  keen  and 
sharp,  but  it  only  is  lastingly  good  ;  I  often  feel  this  on 
coming  home. 

September. — Drank  tea  at  the   s,  which  was  not 

unpleasant  to  me ;  for  that  sweet  woman,  Hannah  Evens, 
was  there,  and  I  felt  the  high  ground  on  which  she  stands. 

November. — I  read  in  the  evening  the  Life  of  Catherine 
Phillips,  in  which  I  was  much  interested,  but  it  made  me  truly 


MT.  31.] 


1808. 


15 


uncomfortable.  I  could  not  read  of  such  excellence  without 
feeling  earnest  desires  to  attain  such  a  state  of  devotedncss ; 
yet  it  seems  almost  impossible  to  me  ;  the  probation  it  must 
require  is  very  hard,  I  do  not  know  how  it  is,  but  wlien  I 
look  forward  to  my  future  life,  though  I  may  sometimes 
build  castles  of  ambition,  oftener  of  domestic  happiness,  yet  I 
can  dwell  on  no  other  with  satisfaction  than  that  of  becoming- 
such  a  character  as  Catherine  Phillips,  May  I  have  real 
greatness  enough,  ever  to  dare  to  imitate  it !  My  father,  on 
my  leaving  the  room,  said,  "  How  I  wish  some  of  you  would 
come  round,  and  make  such  characters  as  Catherine  Phillips 
or  Sarah  Stevenson !"  This  cut  me ;  for  I  love  my  father 
dearly,  and  wish  he  may  ever  be  satisfied  with  us,  as  I  am  sure 
he  deserves  it. 

Sunday. — The  Bevans  [Joseph  Gurney  Bevan  and  his  wife] 
returned  in  the  evening.  They  looked  with  an  eye  of 
mourning  over  the  troop  of  such  unfriendly  Friends,  I 
could  half  sympathise  with  them.  How  I  do  dislike  half- 
Friends,  when  covered  by  riches  ! 

December  6th. — The  Bevans  left  us.  I  have  often  very 
much  enjoyed  their  company ;  yet  it  has  been  like  breathing 
a  rarer  atmosphere — though  better  of  itself,  yet  oppressive  to 
earthly  things.  I  thoroughly  relished  his  high  intellectual 
capacity,  if  not  genius.  *  *  *  *  Surely  the  clouds 
of  dissatisfaction  will  one  day  be  broken  through.  I 
remember  a  dream  that  I  once  had  when  a  very  little 
child,  I  dreamt  of  two  powers — the  one  light,  and  the 
other  darkness — which  by  most  violent  contention  disturbed 
me  extremely.  When  the  light  overcame,  I  was  glad ;  but 
when  the  darkness,  I  was  miserable.  I  cried  so  much,  that 
the  servant  came  with  a  candle,  and  took  hold  of  my  hand. 
Then  the  light  soon  got  the  entire  victory,  and  I  went  to 
sleep  in  great  joy,    I  often  think  of  this  dream. 

Jatmary,  1808. — Grove,  Hannah  Evens  with  us.  How 
inestimable  a  woman  of  that  kind  is  ! 

February. — How  am  I  altered  since  the  commencement  of 
last  year  !  In  looking  back  and  comparing  myself  at  that 
time  with  what  I  believe  I  now  am,  no  encouragement  can 
be  my  portion,  *   *   *   *  As  to  learning,  in  proportion  to 


IG 


1808. 


[.ET.  21. 


my  opportuuities  I  have  done  a  good  deal.  I  have  attained  the 
power  of  arranging  ideas  and  understanding  the  scope  of  an 
author  better  than  last  year.  1  have  studied  chemistry, 
Roman  history,  and  read  Pemberton's  Sir  Isaac  Newton. 
How  wonderful  are  the  laws  and  operations  of  nature  on 
material  existence ! — how  much  more  so  the  laws  of  our 
spiritual  being !  In  drawing  I  have  not  lately  made  much 
progress  :  my  inclination  for  it  seems  totally  gone — why,  I 
can  scarcely  tell :  it  has  its  pleasures  and  its  uses — it  has,  too, 
its  vanity  and  vexation  of  spii-it  to  a  greater  degree  than 
many  other  accomplishments.  As  to  personals  and  manners, 
I  have  improved,  though  they  are  not  subjects  of  so  much 
importance  to  me  as  they  were  :  pride  is  the  most  conspicuous 
demon  that  besets  me. 

Sunday. — I  read  with  great  interest  the  Life  of  Sarah 
Stevenson,  and  enjoyed  the  quiet  and  solemn  effect  it  has 
over  me. 

Wednesday. — Felt  very  much  softened  at  the  thought  of 
leaving  home  this  spring  for  London.  I  could  not  bear  the 
idea  of  parting  with  my  own  dear  family,  particularly  my 
father. 

Wednesday. — ]\Iy  father  read  to  us  in  the  evening  the 
account  of  the  death  of  Charles  James  Fox — truly  interesting ; 
but  high  life  united  with  talents  always  excites  me. 

Tuesday. — In  walking  home  from  meeting  with  my  father, 
he  remarked,  "  What  a  privilege  I  have  felt  it  this  morning 
to  be  at  meeting  \"  His  great  kindness  to  me  and  his  sweet- 
ness altogether,  made  me  love  him  inexpressibly,  and  I  could 
have  shed  tears.  In  such  moments  I  feel  unworthy  and 
ashamed  of  myself  as  his  daughter :  I  can  scarcely  bear  to 
think  what  I  might  be  to  him. 

March,  Tliursday. — In  better  spirits,  on  a  better  foundation. 

Friday. — A  capital  lesson  with  Crome ;  my  spirit  in  draw- 
ing began  to  revive.    Read  the  Iliad  with  Joseph. 

Tuesday. —  Quarterly  Meeting.  Not  very  well,  and  in  a 
bad  mind,  except  in  the  early  part  of  the  meeting  for  worship, 
Avhich  was  rather  better  than  usual ;  but  soon  my  thoughts 
were  scattered,  to  my  discomfort  during  the  rest  of  the  day. 

Sunday. — I  finished  the  Life  of  Sarah  Stevenson,  in  which 


^T.  21.] 


1808. 


17 


I  felt  an  interest  that  was  soothing  and  most  sweet :  it  made 
me  feel  seriousness  after  a  day  almost  spent  without  it.  I 
earnestly  wished  my  latter  end  might  be  like  unto  hers. 

April. — I  do  not  know  how  often  I  wish  I  was  a  good 
Friend ! 

May. — A  most  cheerful,  pleasant  evening  with  my  father 
and  mother.  How  much  I  feel  my  love  and  enjoyment  in 
ray  own  family  increasing  !  Who  can  calculate  the  miseries 
that  result  from  not  being  what  we  ought  to  be  ? 


c 


18 


1808. 


[.ET.  21. 


CHAPTER  II. 

DK.ATH    OF    HER    COUSIN   ELIZABETH    GURNEY  DEEPENING  RELIGIOrS 

CONVICTIONS  ADOPTION  OF  THE  LANGUAGE  AND  DRESS  OF  A  FRIEND 

 ATTENDS  ANOTHER  YEARLY  MEETING  IN  LONDON  HER  ATTACH- 
MENT TO  THE  PRINCIPLES  OF  FRIENDS  CONFIRMED  HER  HAPPINESS 

OF  MIND,    AND    INTEREST   IN  THE   DUTIES    OF    LIFE  LETTER  TO 

HER  FATHER  EFFECT  OF  THE  CHANGE  ON  HER  INTERCOURSE  WITH 

OTHERS,  AND  ON  HER  PURSUITS. 

An  event  now  occurred  which  put  a  seal,  as  it  were, 
upon  the  convictions  which,  tlirough  the  operation  of  the 
Holy  Spirit,  had  been  wrought  in  H.  C.  Gurney's  mind. 
This  was  the  death  of  her  cousin  Ehzabeth,  wife  of  John 
Gurney,  jun.,  a  great  favourite  in  the  circle  of  young 
people  by  whom  she  was  surrounded,  and  whose  removal 
from  amongst  them  was  almost  their  first  taste  of  grief. 
It  is  thus  recorded  in  her  journal : — 

May  \2th. —  I  was  with  mamma  in  the  school-room  pre- 
parino;  for  London.  Sad  account  from  Lynn ;  Elizabeth  is 
dead !  Soon  Joseph  and  I  went  to  Earlham  to  give  the 
information  to  Richenda  and  Priscilla.  We  sat  together 
sometime  in  the  deepest  silence. 

Sunday. — At  Keswick  with  my  aunt.*  Her  composure, 
with  her  great  kindness  and  affection  to  me,  I  felt  strongly. 
I  was  left  with  her  in  the  morning  when  the  rest  went  into  the 
plantations. 

June  Srd. — Rode  over  to  Keswick  to  be  with  L  for  an 

hour.  Our  conversation  made  me  see  more  distinctly  the 
miserable  state  of  inconsistency  that  a  gay  Friend  is  in,  which 
strengthened  my  wishes  to  be  out  of  it.  We  are  not  in  the 
world  sufficiently  to  put  on  mourning,  and  our  dress  ill  suits 
the  solemnity  of  the  grave.  Kept  alone  most  of  the  day  with 
a  mind  which  was,  I  believe,  brooding  change. 


*  The  mother  of  Elizabeth  Gurnej'. 


^T.  21.] 


1808. 


19 


It  should  bo  borne  in  mind  that,  in  setting  out  in  life, 
H.  C.  Gurney's  parents  had  not  themselves  maintained, 
nor  required  in  their  children,  a  conformity  in  language, 
dress,, and  deportment,  to  the  usages  of  the  Society. 

4th.— In  the  evening  I  felt  deeply  awed,  and,  as  far  as  I 
could,  earnestly  desired  that  to-morrow  might  he  the  day  in 
which  I  might  be  enabled  to  say,  in  sincerity  of  heart,  "  Thy 
will  be  done.''  I  could  scarcely  speak,  and  sat  profoundly 
silent  with  Anna  Buxton  and  EHzabeth.  Nobody  seemed 
able  to  break  the  stillness,  and  when  some  others  came  in, 
they  seemed  silenced.  I  feared  I  was  acting  further  than  my 
character  authorized  me  to  do,  and  yet  it  was  so  sweet  to  me 
I  could  not  break  it.  Instead  of  going  to  supper,  I  sat  by  my 
father  in  his  room,  whilst  he  was  making  preparations  for  the 
funeral. 

5ih. — At  Earlham,  on  the  day  of  the  funeral,  a  good  deal 
overcome  by  natural  feelings  which  T  did  not  wish  to  restrain, 
but  desired  to  take  my  father's  advice,  in  not  letting  them 
prevent  the  effect  which  I  earnestly  wished  the  solemnity  of  the 
event  might  produce. 

6th. — On  awaking,  I  felt  my  seriousness  nearly  gone  :  I 
begged  it  might  not  forsake  me,  and  it  did  not.  I  walked 
with  my  dear  brothers  and  Rachel  to  the  cottage  :  how  dearly 
I  loved  them,  and  wished  my  love  might  ever  be  of  service 
to  them. 

On  setting  out  for  London  with  her  parents  to  attend 
the  Yearly  Meeting,  she  remarks  : — 

7th. — I  felt  very  serious ;  love  seemed  to  have  smitten  me, 
and  under  that  banner  I  earnestly  hoped  that  I  might  be 
enabled  to  partake  of  whatever  might  be  set  before  me  in  the 
banqueting  house.  I  saw  it  would  be  right  for  me  to  say 
tJtee  and  thou  to  everybody,  and  I  begged  that  I  might  be  so 
kept  in  love  as  to  be  enabled  to  do  it, — that  love  might  draw 
me,  and  not  fear  terrify  me. 

First-day,  21st. — I  woke,  and  begged  to  be  kept.  We 
breakfasted  at  Woodford.  I  managed  to  say  thee  to  my 
uncle  and  aunt,  l)ut  not  to  the  rest :  my  weakness  in  this,  my 

c  2 


20 


1808. 


[^T.  21. 


almost  first  attempt,  was,  I  hope,  excused,  and  did  not  mucli 
oppress  me.  Wc  went  to  meeting  at  Plaistow.  I  felt  very 
serious,  and  my  heart  joined  with  the  words  that  were  spoken. 

Second-day. — I  dined  among  numbers  of  Friends.  I  saw 
how  the  beauty  I  now  love,  was  marred  by  some  of  its  pro- 
fessors ;  but  in  those  who  do  not  spoil  it,  how  lovely  it  is  ! 
I  once  or  twice  felt  proud,  because  conscious  of  being  more 
of  the  gentlewoman  than  my  companions — a  root  of  evil 
within,  which  I  hope  will  be  destroyed.  Deborah  Darby  spoke 
kindly  to  me,  which  I  felt  grateful.  My  mind  has  been 
calmed  and  elevated  in  parts  of  this  day,  which  is  unspeakable 
enjoyment.  That  I  may  never  part  with  such  feelings  from 
negligence  and  disobedience  has  been  my  earnest  desire. 

Fifth-day. — Left  Hampstead  and  my  dear  Louisa  to  go  to 
meeting.  The  ride  was  sweet  to  me ;  my  heart  filled  with 
the  purest  love  to  those  I  had  left,  wishing  their  good.  I  went 
with  the  desire  that  this  meeting  might  deeply  seal  my  reso- 
lution that  my  future  life  might  be  guided  by  Divine 
direction,  and  that  my  will  might  be  brought  into  subjection 
to  the  Divine  will.  The  meeting  was  highly  interesting,  and 
as  satisfying  to  me  as  anything  human  can  be  ;  I  felt,  as  much 
as  I  am  capable  of  feeling,  a  great  deal  of  what  was  said. 
Here  ended  my  Yearly  Meeting ;  I  have  felt  it  deeply 
interesting,  and,  as  far  as  outward  means  are  effectual,  I 
believe  it  was  good  for  me,  since  high  precept  and  example 
are  presented  to  allure ;  but,  though  I  was  often  enamoured 
of  both,  strength  is  only  to  be  had  in  dwelling  deeply  in  the 
secret  of  our  own  minds ;  yet  the  other  should  not  be 
neglected.    I  resolved  not  to  say  you  to  one  person  again. 

Seventh-day. — I  have  kept  my  resolution  of  saying 
thee  and  thou  to  every  one.  This  act  of  obedience  has 
been  the  cause,  I  firmly  believe,  of  much  peaceful  reward, 
and  of  keeping  me  in  a  very  guarded  state ;  but  it  has  often 
given  me  more  pain  than  in  so  apparently  trifling  a  matter 
might  be  expected. 

Bury  Hill,  First-day. — Did  not  get  up  till  past  eight, 
for  which  I  felt  to  blame.  I  talked  too  much  after 
breakfast  without  a  sufficient  guard,  for  which  I  repented. 
Walked  afterwards  with  the  Barclays :  my  heart  felt  very 


JET.  21.] 


1808. 


21 


heavy  all  the  time,  and  it  was  a  difficulty  to  me  to  be  agree- 
able, which  is  now  what  I  am  more  anxious  about  than  ever ; 
wishing  to  show  in  my  behaviour  that  I  am  not  under  the 
government  of  a  hard  Master,  but  that  cheerfulness  and 
amiable  manners  are  the  fruit  of  obedience  to  Him.  I  felt 
very  happy  the  rest  of  the  day. 
Second-day. — Rose  at  six. 

Fifth- day. —  Read  with  Maria  :  my  imagination  roamed 
from  the  book, — a  bad  thing ;  for,  if  it  is  right  to  do  a  thing 
it  is  right  to  attend  to  it,  and  imaginations  are,  I  believe, 
weakening.  I  spent  the  morning  mostly  alone,  drawing  a 
cottage  for  my  uncle.  The  conversation  after  dinner  turned 
ou  saying  thee  and  Mom— that  it  was  better  to  say 
Ihou  than  thee,  which  has  been  our  habit. 

Till  her  recent  change,  she  had  been  in  the  practice 
but  too  prevalent,  especially  with  the  young  members 
of  the  Society,  of  saying  thee,  instead  of  thou,  when 
addressing  one  another  ;  while  i/ou  was  employed  to 
those  not  Friends. 

This  conversation  added  to  what  every  hour  confirms  me  in, 
that  the  world  itself  likes  a  conduct  that  is  markedly  in 
opposition  to  its  own,  rather  than  one  that  conforms  to  it, 
but  not  completely.  May  this  never  be  in  any  degree  the 
motive  that  influences  my  conduct  !  I  walked  and  talked 
with  Elizabeth  in  the  evening  about  people.  In  the  end  I 
felt  and  expressed  it  to  her,  how  much  better  I  thought  it 
would  be  never  to  talk  over  anybody,  even  those  we  most 
love  and  admire ;  for,  though  no  individual  remark  may  be 
unkind,  the  eflFect  of  the  whole  is  weakening,  and  does  not 
tend  to  the  preservation  of  love.  What  a  branch  of  conversa- 
tion would  thus  be  lopped  off!  But  if  we  would  do  right, 
we  must  bear  being  pruned,  and  I  believe  must  sacrifice 
being  what  is  generally  called  "  agreeable  and  entertaining." 

Sixth-day. —  Wrote  to  my  father,  which  I  truly  enjoyed, 
and  read  with  Elizabeth ;  I  sensibly  felt  this  morning  how 
sweetly  time  passes  when  the  mind  is  satisfied.  David  Lindoe 


22 


1808. 


[^T.  21. 


came  in  the  evening.  T  felt  my  old  ambition  of  wishing  to 
sliiue  before  clever  people. 

First-day. — Walked  to  meeting  with  Agatha,  but  depended 
on  my  strength  too  much,  that  conversation  would  not  dis- 
turb my  mind.  I  felt  still  and  comfortable  most  part  of  the 
meeting,  and  thought  of  that  verse — "  Let  the  words  of  my 
mouth  and  the  meditation  of  my  heart  be  acceptable  in  Thy 
sight,  O  Lord,  my  Strength,  and  my  Redeemer  !  "  An  hour 
comfortably  quiet  by  myself,  and  then  Maria  read  to  me. 

Second-day. — Rose  at  six,  and  I  felt,  I  believe,  during  the 
day  the  benefit  of  rising  early. 

Fourth-day. — Walked  with  Agatha  in  the  evening,  and  felt 
that  talking  about  people  of  the  world  and  the  distinctions  of 
rank  engenders  pride,  and  leads  from  the  state  of  mind  we 
ought  to  endeavour  always  to  be  in. 

Sixth-day. — Spent  the  morning  mostly  by  myself,  and  had 
a  sweet  walk  alone,  in  which  all  my  resolves  felt  strengthened. 
However  painful  obedience  may  be,  the  reward  is  unspeakable 
joy  and  peace.  Let  the  prospect  of  proving  my  faith  be 
rather  cause  of  rejoicing  than  pain  to  me;  but  keep  in  the 
present  as  much  as  possible,  for  there  alone  is  to  be  found 
strength.  Looking  forward,  always,  I  believe,  weakens ;  we 
are  apt  to  imagine  trials  which  never  come  to  pass,  or 
are  made  easier  than  we  anticipate. 

First-day. — How  deeply  I  felt,  enjoyed,  and  was  strength- 
ened at  meeting !  For  the  first  time  to-day  I  called  the  days 
of  the  week  numerically  on  principle  :  it  cost  me  at  first  a 
blush.  A  walk  in  the  evening  with  our  whole  party.  How 
sweet  it  is  to  feel  one's  influence  a  good  one  !  This  day  has 
afforded  me  deeper  and  sweeter  feelings  than  any  I  have  yet 
passed. 

Second-day. — Went  out  sketching  with  Maria.  I  feel  that 
I  could,  if  my  attention  were  paid  to  it,  go  a  great  way  in 
this  art,  and  never  felt  my  powers  so  strong ;  but  I  must 
sacrifice  all  my  idols,  and  be  governed  but  by  one  Lord,  who 
is  jealous  of  aU  others.  If  my  mind  is  kept  by  his  excellent 
goodness,  all  other  excellence  wiU  sink  in  the  comparison. 

Third-day. — *  *  *  *  EHzabeth  convinced  me  of  the 
reason  of  what  in  my  own  mind  I  felt  did  me  harm, — that 
reading  books  of  great  wit,  exercisedupon  the  inconsistencies 


^T.  31.] 


1808. 


23 


of  human  nature,  is  hurtful,  as  it  wounds  the  spirit  of  love 
which  we  ought  to  cultivate,  and  which  I  believe  is  the 
only  cure  for  these  evils. 

Fourth-day. — Left  Bury  Hill.  I  can  look  to  the  time  I 
have  spent  there  as  the  happiest  in  my  life.  I  have  earnestly 
wished  that  my  example  and  influence  in  future  may  be 
useful  to  those  whom  never  before  did  I  love  with  so  sweet 
or  so  great  affection.  The  day  was  spent  quietly  and  without 
much  excitement.  I  felt  I  loved  children  and  working  better 
than  I  used  to  do. 

After  speaking  of  a  gentleman  in  the  neighbourhood 
who  had  an  alarming  seizure,  she  says  : — 

Fifth-day. — During  the  course  of  this  evening  I  sensibly 
felt  there  was  but  one  stay,  and  with  it,  the  events  of  life 
lose  much  of  their  bitterness. 

Seventh-day. — The  morning  mostly  by  myself,  making  a 
cap.  At  first  I  felt  it  would  be  most  difficult  to  wear  it ;  but 
the  idea  soon  grew  easy  to  me,  and  in  the  end  I  was  firmly 
persuaded  it  was  right  for  me  to  do  it. 

Second-day. — I  felt  once  or  twice  during  this  day  a  touch 
of  what  I  believe  is  spiritual  pride. 

Third-day. — Exhausted  in  body  and  deeply  feeling  the 
weight  of  what  I  am  about  to  profess ;  for  I  dread  hurting  a 
cause  I  do  so  dearly  love  and  admire ;  yet  I  believe  with 
unshaken  confidence,  that  if  I  keep  close  to  my  Guide,  I  shall 
be  preserved  to  glorify  Him.  1  have  dared  to  wish  that  no 
suffering  may  be  spared  me  that  may  enable  me  to  do  so. 

Previously  to  her  return  home,  her  father,  with  cha- 
racteristic prudence,  blended  with  genuine  affection, 
wTote  to  her  freely  and  fully  on  the  important  phase  in 
her  rehgious  life  through  which  she  was  now  passing, 
snowing  his  concern  lest,  through  the  ardour  of  her 
spirit,  she  should  be  induced  to  act  without  sufficiently 
examining  the  ground  of  her  actions.  The  following 
is  her  reply  : — 


24 


1808. 


[mt.  21. 


Before  Breakfast,  Woodford,  21st  of  7tli  mo.,  1808. 

My  Dear  Father, 

Thy  letter,  which  I  received  yesterday,  mixed 
with  much  pleasure,  gave  me  some  pain  from  two  insinuations; 
first,  tliat  it  appeared  difficult  for  thee  to  believe  that  the  soil 
had  been  sufficiently  prepared  by  suffering  to  make  that  good 
ground  in  which  the  seed  can  alone  flourish.  Time,  perhaps, 
can  only  openly  make  known  my  most  earnest  desire  that  my 
heart  may  be  sincere.  I  have  even  dared  to  wish  that  I 
might  endure  the  hottest  furnace,  that  I  might  be  so  purified 
that  at  the  end  I  may  stand  perfect,  confident  at  the  same 
time  that  by  no  strength  of  my  own  can  I  endure  it ; 
earnestly  wishing  that  every  moment  I  may  be  kept  depen- 
dent on  that  strength  which  is  indeed  sufficient  for  us,  and 
in  which  I  may,  with  deep  and  reverent  thankfulness,  acknow- 
ledge, I  have  been  enabled  to  feel  His  yoke  easy,  and  His 
burden  light ;  and  I  do  indeed  believe  all  His  ways  are  ways 
of  pleasantness,  and  all  His  paths  peace. 

I  am  sorry  thou  hast  thought  that  I  might  have  cast  my 
cares  more  upon  my  nearest  connexions  in  life ;  indeed,  I 
never  loved  them  so  dearly  or  felt  their  value  so  much  as 
now :  but  I  think  I  can  remember  that  thou  thyself  hast 
taught  me,  that  on  no  human  help  can  we  in  any  degree  rely. 
I  do  indeed  believe  that,  as  we  are  enabled  to  keep  the  first 
great  commandment,  and  are  made  willing  to  sacrifice  all  our 
worldly  affections  to  the  love  of  God,  we  shall  receive  a  spirit 
in  which  we  shall  really  love  our  friends,  and  all  the  innocent 
pleasures  of  life,  better  than  ever  we  did  before,  but  that  we 
shall  be  raised  above  dependence  upon  them.  These,  my 
very  dear  father,  have  been  in  a  degree  my  feelings.  May  they 
neither  give  pain  nor  displeasure  to  thee,  nor  to  any  of  my 
dear  family  ! 

I  do  not  think  I  have  stayed  too  long  from  home,  but  I 
now  look  forward  to  returning,  with  great  interest,  I  should 
say,  rather  than  pleasure ;  for,  after  so  serious  a  change  as  I 
feel  I  have  undergone  since  we  parted,  there  must  be  pain  in 
meeting  again  those  whom  I  most  dearly  love.  *  *  *  « 
Very  affectionately,  thy  child, 

II.  C.  GUKNEY. 


^T.  21.] 


1808. 


25 


Sixth-day,  15/A  of  7th  mo. — A  pleasant  ride  with  Samuel 
Hiul  Elizabeth  Gurney,  through  part  of  the  Forest.  *  * 
*  ♦  *  *  J  believe  it  is  best  not  to  form  an  opinion,  but 
where  judgment  is  wanted  for  the  performance  of  an  action, 
and  then  as  little  as  possible  depend  on  ourselves.  I  repented 
this  morning  of  giving  mine  on  the  bringing  up  of  children. 

Third- day,  \^th. — My  mind  was  kept  in  a  most  sweet 
state  this  afternoon.  I  am  conscious  of  acquiring  the  love 
and  admiration  of  those  I  am  with,  and  begged  to  be  pre- 
served from  the  evil  it  may  excite  in  me.  I  have  thought 
of  and  feared  the  truth  of  the  fable  of  the  sun  and  ^olus. 
Silent  in  riding  from  Tottenham,  during  which  I  saw  and 
felt  deeply  the  beauty  of  my  profession ;  joyful  in  its  being 
mine,  and  in  feeling  the  incalculable  ruin  which  is  caused 
among  the  children  of  men,  by  departing  from  that  Guide 
who  can  alone  lead  us  safely  through  time,  and  following 
whom  (however  rough  the  road  may  sometimes  appear),  is 
indeed  the  way  not  only  to  the  joys  of  another  life,  but  to 
those  of  this.  Sweetly  feeling  these  truths  we  arrived  at  my 
Uncle  Barclay's. 

Fifth-day,  ^\st. — General  Phipps  came  in  the  evening. 
My  Uncle  desired  I  would  take  his  likeness.  I  wished  to  be 
able  to  refuse,  if  I  believed  it  was  necessary  for  me  to  give  up 
drawing ;  but  I  also  wished  to  obey  my  Uncle  in  all  things 
lawful,  and  I  do  not  yet  feel  this  unlawful,  though  I  believe 
I  shall  naturally  draw  but  seldom  now.  A  mind  kept  on  the 
Christian's  watch  is,  I  think,  little  capable  of  entering  into  the 
spirit  of  the  fine  arts. 

Sixth-day. — Began  to  draw  General  Phipps.  I  felt  that  I 
was  standing  on  dangerous  ground  from  the  praise  I  received, 
and  I  earnestly  desired  it  might  not  hurt  me.  I  have  felt 
during  this  day  the  difficulty  of  keeping  free  from  the  spirit 
of  the  world  in  the  society  of  those  who  possess  all  the  charms 
of  its  accomplishments,  and  how  almost  impossible  it  would 
be  for  me  to  be  preserved  without  the  manners  and  appear- 
ance of  a  Fiiend,  which  are,  I  do  now  firmly  believe,  a  strong 
bulwark ;  but,  like  all  bulwarks,  if  a  constant  watch  is  not 
kept,  the  place,  and  the  bulwark  too  may  easily  be  taken. 

Second-day,  25th. — A  quiet  day,  feeling  by  comparison 
that  the  lines  are  fallen  unto  me  in  pleasant  places  ;  yea,  I 


26 


1808. 


[^T.  21. 


have  a  goodly  heritage.  Keep  ever  before  thee,  for  cause  of 
humbleuess,  that  "  where  much  is  given,  much  is  required." 

Third-day,  26th. — Weut  w  ith  my  Uncle,  Emma  Chapman, 
and  the  boys  to  London ;  then  with  Emma  to  a  milliner's 
shop,  where  I  felt  rejoiced  at  being  in  part,  (and  hoping  to 
be  entirely)  relieved  from  its  perplexities.  E-oom  for  the  exer- 
cise of  patience  on  our  return  home,  which  I  did  not  entirely 
fill  up.  A  pleasant  walk  with  Emma  in  the  evening,  com- 
paring ourselves  to  what  we  were  when  we  were  together  three 
or  four  years  ago  :  How  much  cause  for  thankfulness  that 
the  world,  I  believe,  has  lost  much  of  its  hold  on  both  of  us  ! 

Fourth-day. — The  morning  quiet,  and  after  dinner  set  off 
with  H.  G.  for  home.  I  feared  the  stimulating  effect  that  the 
power  of  his  mind  often  has  produced  upon  me,  and  begged 
that  I  might  be  kept  centred  and  watchful.  We  lodged  at 
Hockerill,  and  the  ride  was  pleasant 

Fifth-da^. — Rose  early,  and,  having  to  wait  a  little  while, 
sat  down  and  read ;  but  more  sought  to  be  quiet  and  to  be 
kept  guarded  against  the  temptation  of  endeavouring  to  shine 
before  a  man  of  talent.  During  our  ride,  he  talked  a  great 
deal  about  religion,  poetry,  and  the  people  we  are  nearly 
connected  with,  in  as  interesting  a  manner  as  great  intellec- 
tual endowments  could  produce.  I  arrived  at  the  Grove  in 
the  evening  :  my  father  was  gone  to  Keswick,  and  I  had 
nearly  an  hour  before  be  came  home,  tired  and  exhausted,  to 
collect  myself. 

Sixth-day. — Rode  with  my  father  to  Cromer.  The  idea 
of  arriving,  as  we  approached  nearer,  did  not  excite  much 
feeling ;  the  knowledge  of  being  different  from  my  sisters 
gave  me  pain,  as  I  found  it  had  done  them. 

Fifth-day. — Emma*  met  with  an  accident.  I  was  almost 
surprised  to  find  my  increased  confidence  under  circumstances 
of  alarm  with  a  mind  at  ease. 

Sixth-day. — Went  to  meeting — some  Friends  there;  per- 
haps never  have  my  feelings  been  so  deep.  The  exercise  of  it 
was  great,  but  it  was  comfortable  to  partake  in  a  degree  of 
that  silence  I  have  so  often  longed  for.  Rode  home  with  my 
father,  and,  though  he  did  not  say  much,  the  nearness  he 
seemed  to  feel  for  me  was  most  sweet.  . 

*  iler  sister. 


^T.  21.] 


1808. 


27 


Seventh-day. — In  this  week  ray  joy  has  been  increasing, 
and  my  buideu  decreasing.  I  have  desired  humility  which 
can  alone  secure  in  mc  that  [spiritual]  prosperity  which  I  now 
feel  great ;  but  how  apt  is  all  prosperity  to  puff  up ;  nothing 
but  the  power  of  Omnipotence  on  the  mind  can,  I  am  per- 
suaded, counteract  its  effects.  May  I  ever  remember  what 
my  father  said  to  me, — that  the  longer  he  lived,  the  more 
careful,  observation  made  him  not  to  judge  of  others  ;  for  he 
had  often  found  that  profession  puffeth  up,  possession  alone 
humbleth. 

Fifth-day. — The  meeting  with  Rachel  Gurney  and  Anna 
Buxton  was  agitatingly  interesting,  but  in  the  midst  of  it  a 
peace  and  satisfaction  which  is  indeed  abundant  recompense. 
Dear  Anna  returned  with  me ;  we  were  silent  during  the 
ride ;  I  felt  nearly  united  to  her.  How  sweet  it  is  to  feel 
that  degree  of  union,  which,  I  firmly  believe,  if  we  continue 
faithful,  will  increase  in  time  and  be  made  sure  in  eternity. 
To  dinner  came  Saint  [the  mathematical  teacher].  I  talked 
to  him  about  the  state  of  the  mathematical  world,  which  was 
interesting  to  me ;  but  I  felt  the  danger  of  knowledge 
puffing  up.  It  has  several  times  been  a  question  with  me,  if 
I  should  not  almost  entirely  give  up  further  acquirement  in 
the  mathematics;  but  I  believe,  if  kept  secondary,  this 
study  is  a  handmaid  to  virtue.  It  certainly  enlarges  the 
scope  of  the  mind,  and  gives  power. 

Qth. — Mamma,  Anna,  and  I  went  to  meeting ;  the  ride 
back  M'ith  mamma  pleasant,  agreeing  about  the  effect  of 
bringing  up  children  with  the  external  marks  of  a  Friend. 

bth. — I  was  requested  to  use  my  influence  to  encourage 

 in  the  pui'suit  of  the  one  thing  needful.    This  idea 

was  most  interesting  at  the  time ;  it  has  led  me  to  consider 
what  the  manner  of  our  influence  over  one  another  ought  to 
be,  and  I  have  believed  that  we  can  only  exert  it  by  showing 
the  sweet  fruits  of  devotion,  manifested  by  those  actions 
which  spring  from  peace  and  love ;  for  if  we  are  under  the 
government  of  the  spirit  of  love,  a  kindness  of  manner  will 
be  shown  to  all,  which  will  in  a  degree  soften  and  allure 
those  whose  hearts  are  not  entirely  hardened ;  but  as  to 
any  immediate  influence,  I  believe,  we  can  only  affect  the 


28 


1808. 


[^T.  21. 


individual  as  we  are  under  the  guidance  of  Divine  love  and 
power. 

Sixth-day. — Went  to  meeting  with  mamma  and  Anna.  In 
going,  mamma  desired  me  to  read  the  first  Chapter  of  Penn's 
"  No  Cross,  No  Crown."  I  acknowledged  it  true.  When  I  had 
heard  it  before,  I  honestly  pleaded  guilty,  with  a  heavy  heart, 
and  unmoved  "  Will  not."  How  mercifully  has  adorable 
Goodness,  by  arraying  Truth  in  the  garment  of  Love,  allured 
me  to  her,  and  strengthened  me  to  embrace  her ! 

First-day,  Wth. — Cromer.  My  father  spoke  at  meeting, 
which  he  has  done  several  times  lately.  In  riding  there,  I 
read  a  little  in  Job  Scott.  I  have  once  or  twice  wished  I 
had  read  more  of  Friends'  books  before  I  changed  ;*  for  the 
little  I  know  has  sometimes  been  a  comfort  to  me.  Rode 

home  with  in  her  carriage.    Would  that  all  felt  from 

experience  that  no  liberty  affords  equal  enjoyment  to  the 
glorious  liberty  of  the  cross  of  Christ ! 

Second-day . — Could  not  make  mamma  enter  into  my  motives 
for  preferring  to  wear  stuff  to  silk ;  that  I  did  not  feel  wearing 
stuff  or  silk  made  a  person  better  or  worse,  but  the  thing  T 
have  seen  needful  for  myself  was  becoming  in  appearance  a 
Friend.  It  has  seemed  to  me  that  the  general  appearance 
is  the  thing  we  are  to  look  to,  and  not  to  reason  about  the 
particulars  that  compose  it.f  Mamma,  I  believe,  could  not 
enter  into  my  idea,  that  if  we  are  marked  as  Friends,  it  should 
be  done  correctly,  "  One  thing  or  the  other,"  has  been  my 
maxim  through  life ;  but  I  fear  I  did  not  behave  with  proper 
consideration  and  gentleness.  If  w  e  lose  the  banner  of  love 
even  in  the  defence  of  right,  we  are  not  leaning  for  de- 
pendence on  that  strength  which  can  alone  support  what 
is  right. 

Fifth-day. — Drank  tea  at  the  P  s.   I  felt  the  awkward- 

*  It  may  be  hardly  necessary  to  remark  that  this,  and  some  similar 
expressions  employed  by  her  about  this  time,  refer  to  that  work  of 
Divine  grace  in  her  soul  which  had  been  accompanied  by  many  out- 
ward indications  of  her  allegiance  to  her  Divine  Master. 

t  Silk  waa  at  that  time  very  expensive, — twice  its  present  price  ; 
and  was  consequently  then  but  little  worn  by  Friends  generally. 


^T.  21.] 


1808. 


29 


ness  of  being  a  Friend ;  it  wciglied  upon  me,  but  I  was 
sensible  of  its  preserving  influence  and  was  humbled  under  it, 
which  I  was  thankful  for,  as  feeling  it  a  wholesome  state,  in 
which  we  are  led  to  seek  for  help. 

Seventh-day. — How  true  it  is  we  have  infinitely  more  of 
this  world  by  being  made  willing  to  surrender  it !  My  am- 
bition to  be  well-bred  and  liking  for  Avell-bred  people  have 
increased.  I  believe  this  will  be  a  dangerous  rock  for  me ; 
for,  though  I  think  it  is  a  good  thing  to  possess — truth 
always  keeping  the  upper  hand — as  it  gives  confidence  and 
ease  of  manner  without  rudeness,  and  great  consideration  for 
others  ;  yet  true  politeness  is,  I  believe,  only  in  the  possession 
of  those  whose  every  action  is  under  the  influence  of  that 
love  which  vital  Christianity  can  alone  infuse  into  the  heart. 
One  has  the  semblance  of  virtue,  the  other  is  virtue  :  the  one 
may  be  the  result  of  the  spirit  of  the  fine  arts,  the  other  that 
of  Christianity. 

Second-day . — Every  imagination  of  the  heart  of  man  is  evil, 
or  of  evil  eff'ect.  Pride  !  thou  art  a  great  enemy  of  mine ;  I 
almost  believe  thou  dost  now  attack  me  more  vehemently 
than  ever. 

Fourth-day . — My  father,  mother,  and  Jane  went  to  Norwich 
in  the  morning.  Truly  happy,  and  thought  of  what  I  had 
read  in  Lord  Bacon, — that  the  face  of  reason  was  towards 
truthj  that  of  action  towards  goodness ;  so  having  settled  my 
household,  and  done  all  the  good  1  could  think  of  by  action,  I 
set  my  face  towards  reason.  Went  into  my  own  room,  and  read 
his  "  Advancement  of  Learning""  for  an  hour  or  two.  It  is 
admirable  to  see  how  far  human  wit  can  go,  and  pleasant  to 
enjoy  it,  when  the  heart  is  at  ease.  Let  my  earnest  endeavour 
be  directed  to  attain  consistency  of  character :  it  is  not  in 
man  of  himself  to  acquire  it ;  but  "  My  presence  shall  go 
with  thee  and  I  will  give  thee  rest,"  is  the  language  of  Him 
that  was,  and  is,  and  is  to  come. 

First-day,  2Sth. — Ride  and  meeting  interesting.  I  think  I 
have  begun  to  feel  what  deep  spiritual  labour  is.  May  I  be 
preserved  from  fainting  under  it  ! 

Second-day. — General   W   came  after  breakfast. 

Walked  down  to  the  shore  with  him.    He  was  particularly 


30  1808.  [.ET.  21. 

kind  to  me.  1  fear  his  attentions  lay  a  snare  for  my  humility 
in  more  ways  than  one. 

Fourth-day. — "Went  to  Earlham  with  Richenda.  The  plea- 
sure and  interest  altogether  put  me  off  my  guard.  Thou 
hast  never  more  occasion  to  watch  than  in  tliose  moments 
when  thy  heart  is  warmly  excited  by  tliose  thou  hast  loved 
so  dearly. 

Seventh-day. — This  week  has  been  spent  chiefly  in  attend- 
ing to  .    I  hope  I  have  been  useful.   Had  I,  as  formerly, 

depended  upon  no  other  food  for  my  mind  than  what  was 
intellectual,  I  should  have  been  dull  to  a  degree  ;  but  instead, 
I  was  usually  cheerful  and  happy ;  yet  I  have  not  lost  my 
relish  for  intellectual  pleasure. 

Third-day. — How  is  life  now  changed  for  me  !  Those  times 
when  I  used  to  be  most  gay  and  sprightly  are  now  those 
when  I  feel  the  pruning-hook ;  when  I  used  to  be  dull  and 
disconsolate,  I  am  now  commonly  full  of  joy. 

Fifth-day. — My  mind  in  a  high  tone  this  morning.  Read 
a  little  of  Milton.  Went  down  to  bathe — a  most  beautiful 
morning — swam  capitally — and  went  home  disappointed  at 

not  seeing  the  H  s.    But  the  morning  was  so  fine,  and 

I  was  so  happy,  that  I  did  not  like  to  sit  down  to  read :  so, 
after  some  consultation  within  myself,  I  resolved  to  walk  by 
the  side  of  the  cliff  and  go  down  to  the  shore.  The  scene 
was  beautiful ;  the  sea  coloured  in  the  finest  manner.  Many 
ships.  It  was  one  of  the  most  glorious  sights  I  ever  beheld, 
and  I  enjoyed  it  alone ;  but  still  I  felt  how  little  outward 
objects  were  soul-satisfying.  A  drive  with  Jane  in  the  mule 
cart,  and  then  walked  nearly  from  Beckhive  home.  The 
shore  was  sweet,  and  my  mind  turned  to  its  chief  Love,  with 
earnest  desires,  first,  that  those  to  whom  I  feel  most  nearly 
united,  then  the  whole  world,  might  come  to  know  how 
sweet  He  is ;  that  every  action  might  be  so  under  his 
government  that  I  may  glorify  his  cause  on  the  earth. 
Yet  what  need  have  I  of  preservation  from  the  danger  of 
attributing  any  of  the  praise  to  self  May  it  be  solely  to 
glorify  Thee  that  I  endeavour  to  make  myself  agreeable 
to  dLUj  one  !  But  who  that  is  filled  with  Thy  joy  and  fear  does 
not  manifest  them  by  his  words,  manners,  and  actions  ?  Then 


Air.  21.] 


1808. 


31 


what  a  sweet  savour  they  have  !  Ever  give  me  this  fear,  and 
joy  when  it  is  good  for  me. 

Fourth-day. — Called  on  the  s  in  the  morning.  They 

discomposed  me  a  good  deal  by  talking  of  Friends,  seeming 
to  have  no  correct  idea  of  them.  How  deep  must  the 
foundation  be  laid  to  support  our  sacred  profession  in  its  true 
majesty  and  beauty  !  None  but  the  regenerate  man  can  do 
it.  I  felt  hurt  at  the  conversation  of  the  morning;  but 
may  blame  myself  almost  always  for  unhappiness.  I  should 
have  left  them  sooner,  or  tried  to  turn  the  subject.  Became 

more  cool  by  the  time  the  s  came  in  the  evening.  This 

day  and  in  many  of  the  last,  I  thought  a  great  deal ;  but  oh  ! 
for  that  word  which  says,  "  Peace  be  still." 

Sixth-day. — This  day  I  began  again  to  read  ;  but  the  cul- 
tivation of  my  intellectual  part  has  been  the  subject  of  many 
a  thought,  whether  it  would  not  injure  that  which  I  love 
better.  I  never  was  so  capable  of  vigorous  attention,  as  my 
heart  never  was  so  easy,  my  head  never  so  clear.  I  feel 
the  danger  of  it  for  myself ;  but  still  I  believe  with  bounds 
I  may  pursue  it ;  and  these  bounds  I  thought  were  active 
duties,  even  the  minor  ones,  little  attentions,  &c.  Whenever 
these  are  called  for,  the  other  must  be  sacrificed.  Still,  if  I 
carefully  husband  my  time,  head  may  have  some  attention 
paid  it ;  and  it  will  be  fine  exercise  of  my  patience  and 
temper  never  to  be  disturbed  by  interruptions,  however 
interested  I  may  be  in  my  pursuit :  if  I  am,  the  proper 
watch  is  not  kept  up. 

Seventh-day. — General  W  at  breakfast.    I  knew,  and 

in  a  degree  felt,  how  much  I  needed  a  preserving  power  to 
watch  over  me  to  guard  me  from  being  led  away  by  the 
worldly  honour  that  his  very  marked  attentions  give.  Were 
my  heart  as  it  should  be,  I  believe  I  should  not  feel  elated 
in  any  degree  by  it ;  but  I  know  where  to  apply  for  help 
against  all  that  is  at  enmity  with  my  soul's  salvation.  Where 
should  I  have  been  tossed  had  I  not  found  this  anchor  ?  I 
was  glad  that  next  day  was  meeting  day,  for  there  perhaps  I 
have  more  deeply  known  my  centre  than  anywhere  else. 

First-day,  9th. — I  felt  more  quiet,  mj  mind  raised  above 
the  dazzling  splendour  of  worldly  greatness. 

First-day,  \6th. — I  often  long  for  meeting,  and  am  not 


32 


1809. 


[^T.  22. 


generally  disappointed  in  its  effects  upon  me.  John 
Wagstaffe's  funeral  in  the  afternoon.  Death,  though  rather 
comfortahle  than  terrible  to  me  now,  is  full  of  awfulness 
when  the  idea  of  it  is  brought  home. 

Fifth-day. — My  father  took  me  into  the  study  to  warn  me 
against  being  hurt  by  people's  kindness  and  love  for  me. 

Fourth-day. — Went  to   s  about  a  cloak  which  has 

cost  my  mind  some  indecision.  Not  what  things  are,  but 
the  character  they  mark,  is  what  I  look  to  in  my  clothes.  I 
believe  the  true  spirit  of  my  profession  is  the  opposite  of 
that  of  doing  penance,  and  I  wish  to  avoid  every  likeness  of  it ; 
but  in  avoiding  one  reproach  do  not  cast  a  worse  upon  it — 
extravagance. 

Fifth-day. — Dined  at  Earlham  with  all  the  family.  On 
returning  I  felt  real  pleasure  at  unexpectedly  seeing  Jonathan 
Hutchinson.  After  supper  he  desired  me  to  sit  down,  and 
addressed  me  in  the  kindest  manner,  warning  me  that  our 
enemy  was  an  unwearied  one,  and  pursued  us  in  every  way ; 
that  we  should  carefully  watch  to  distinguish  the  voice  of  the 
true  Shepherd  ;  that  this  voice  was  not  in  the  whirlwind,  but 
it  was  the  still  small  voice.  He  kindly  hoped  not  to  dis- 
courage me.  He  believed  the  Lord's  work  was  on  the  wheel, 
and  that  He  would  gather  his  lambs  into  his  bosom.  My 
heart  acknowledged  the  truth  of  what  he  said,  and  I  thanked 
him  for  it. 

Fifth-day. — Self,  I  am  daily  more  persuaded,  is  my  great 
enemy,  and  I  fear  I  do  not  combat  suflSciently  against  the 
love  of  it.  Now,  if  I  would  endeavour  to  be  a  follower  of 
Christ,  ought  I  not  to  wrestle  with  every  enemy  that  would 
prevent  my  feeling  [grieved]  for  those  who  are  separated 
from  it  ? 

9th  of  2nd  mo.,  1809. — Twenty-two  years  old.  Through 
Divine  mercy,  great  is  the  change  that  this  year  has  wrought 
in  me.  The  love  of  God  has  enticed  me  to  begin  that  spiritual 
journey  which  leads  to  the  promised  land.  I  have  left,  by  his 
guidance  and  strength,  the  bondage  of  Egypt,  and  I  have  seen 
his  wonders  in  the  deep.  May  the  endeavour  of  my  life  be  to 
keep  close  to  that  "  Angel"  [of  his  presence]  who  can  deliver 
us  from  the  trials  and  dangers  of  this  world  !  I  have  not  studied 
much  this  year,  yet  I  have  almost  every  day  read  a  little, 


.Ki:  22.] 


180!). 


33 


and  uevcr  wus  my  sight  so  clear  into  the  intellectual  world. 
Stud}^  may,  I  believe,  usefully  occupy  some  portions  of  time. 
With  regard  to  externals,  man  does  not  so  often  put  me  in 
fear,  so  I  am  more  easy. 

10th. — Felt  very  peaceful  and  satisfied  in  active  employ- 
ment ;  but  conscious  of  the  deep  watchfulness  it  requires  not 
to  be  driven  from  my  centre  by  it,  even  if  the  object  of  it  be 
attention  to  the  poor. 

16ih. — This  last  week  has  been  chiefly  employed  in  pre- 
paring for  a  school.  1  have  been  satisfied  iti  active  employ- 
ment, as  leaving  the  heart  more  leisure  than  study  does ;  but 
I  have  felt  the  continual  proof  it  makes  of  our  wisdom,  and 
that  that  wisdom  must  be  from  above  :  if  we  do  not  possess 
it,  we  had  better  be  quiet. 


b 


34 


1811. 


[m.  24. 


CHAPTER  in. 

HER    MARRIAGE  DOMESTIC     LIFE  CAl-L    TO    THE    MINISTRY  DEATH 

OF  HER   ELDEST   CHILD,   AND  OF  HER  SISTER   BIRKHECK  ILLNESS 

AT  PETERBOR^UGH  HER  EARLY  MENTAL  EXERCISES  AND  EXPE- 
RIENCE JONATHAN  BACKHOUSE  ALSO  A  MINISTER. 

In  the  foregoing  chapters  we  have  traced  the  growth 
and  gradual  development  of  H.  C.  Gurney's  mind,  and 
the  formation  of  her  character.  We  have  seen  the 
pursuits  of  literature,  of  science  and  of  taste,  employing 
her  powers,  and  cultivated  by  her  with  no  common 
success.  We  have  seen  the  glory  of  this  world  tarnished 
in  her  view,  and  partly  under  the  influence  of  youthful 
grief,  but  more  especially  under  the  immediate  operation 
of  the  Holy  Spirit,  her  affections  weaned  from  temporal 
objects  and  turned  towards  the  treasure  in  Heaven  that 
fadeth  not  away. 

Yet  the  process  indeed  appears  to  have  been  very  little 
dependent  upon  any  outward  means.  To  our  imperfect 
sight  she  seems  to  have  been  for  a  time  groping  her 
way  in  the  quest  of  Him  whom  her  soul  loved  ;  but  the 
extracts  which  have  been  given  from  her  journal,  and 
others  which,  to  avoid  repetition,  have  been  suppressed, 
bear  evidence  that  He  was  himself  becoming  to  her  "  the 
chiefest  among  ten  thousand  and  altogether  lovely  and 
though  we  see,  it  is  true,  more  of  the  e/^ects  of  her  love 
to  Him  in  her  willingness  to  deny  herself  and  take  up 
the  cross,  than  we  do  of  the  clear  and  distinct  reception 
in  her  understanding  of  the  doctrine  of  "  Jesus  Christ 
and  Him  crucified,"  we  cannot  doubt  what  was  really  the 


-KT.  24.J 


1811. 


35 


nature  of  the  tree  which  bore  this  fruit,  and  we  see  in 
her  subsequent  hfe,  and  especially  in  the  clearness,  the 
soundness,  and  the  power  of  her  gospel  ministry,  abun- 
dant illustration  of  the  truth  that  he  who  doeth  the  will 
of  the  Father  shall  know  of  the  doctrine  of  Christ,  both 
of  its  authority  and  its  nature. 

A  period  now  succeeds  devoid  of  any  very  striking 
religious  experience,  and  one  moreover,  respecting 
which,  scarcely  any  memoranda  of  her  own  exist  to  aid 
us  in  tracing  her  course. 

H.  C.  Gurney  was  mai-ried  in  the  spring  of  1811,  to 
Jonathan  Backhouse,  of  Darlington,  to  whom  she  was 
closely  united  in  the  bonds  of  spiritual  as  well  as 
natural  affection,  and  who  proved  a  helpmate  peculiarly 
fitted  to  her  need  in  her  remarkable  course  in  life. 

A  description  in  her  own  words  of  the  entrance  upon 
her  new  home  may  here  be  interesting. 

Blackwell,  near  Darlington,  19th  of  6tli  mo.,  1811. 

My  Dear  Mother, 

The  thought  of  my  parents  and  their  kindness 
has  often  half  choked  me ;  new  circumstances  have  tended 
to  remind  me  of  my  affection  for  you. 

They  are  circumstances  which  are  more  pleasant  than  I 
expected,  more  than  can  often  be  found,  and  more  than  I 
think  I  have  yet  been  sufficiently  grateful  for.  In  my 
husband's  family  there  does  not  appear  to  be  one  whom  it 
is  difficult  to  love,  and  their  habits  of  intercourse  are  com- 
fortable and  easy. 

My  father  and  mother  Backhouse  are  very  kind,  and 
the  young  people  an  unusually  pleasing  nice-looking  set. 
We  have  been  receiving  company  these  last  three  afternoons, 
and  many  agreeable  people  came.  Perhaps  I  am  too  old  to 
be  much  excited  by  being  stared  at.  I  am  a  bride,  and  a 
bride  here  is  the  puppet  show  of  the  day.  As  to  my  house 
and  the  situation,  I  believe  it  will  really  please  thee,  or  thou 

u  2 


36 


18U. 


[jet.  27. 


must  be  most  unreasonably  ambitious  if  it  does  not ;  and  for 
myself,  as  liousekeeper;  I  think  I  fairly  promise  not  to  tarnish 
the  glory  of  my  ancestors. 

I  hardly  like  to  be  writing  in  this  waj^,  when  I  consider 
the  circumstances  you  are  now  in  with  regard  to  my  dear 
Uncle  Gui'ney.  The  remembrance  of  him  is  pleasant  though 
affecting  to  mc. 

Thy  most  aflPectionate  child, 

H.  C.  Backhouse. 

She  now  devoted  herself  to  domestic  objects,  with 
the  ardour  which  she  had  formerly  given  to  intellectual 
pursuits.  Her  mental  and  physical  powers  were  for  a 
time  almost  absorbed  by  the  cares  and  pleasures  of 
her  family.  Conjugal  duties,  the  i-egulation  of  her 
establishment  and  the  training  of  her  children,  consti- 
tuted almost  her  sole  occupation.  In  the  government 
of  the  latter  she  was  firm  ;  her  words  were  few  but 
emphatic,  and  once  uttered,  were  not  easily  forgotten. 
Often  a  single  look  stood  in  place  of  a  command  or  a 
reproof. 

The  following  are  among  the  few  entries  in  her 
journal  between  1809  and  1820  : — 

Eighth  Month,  1813. — These  last  four  years  are,  perhaps, 
best  left  in  that  situation  in  which  spiritual  darkness  has  in 
great  measure  involved  them.  It  may  be  that  the  sweet 
and  new  objects  of  external  love  and  necessary  attention  in 
which  I  have  been  engaged,  have  too  much  drawn  my  mind 
from  internal  watchfulness,  after  the  first  flow  of  spiritual  joy 
began  to  subside  ;  or  it  has  been  the  will  of  the  Author  of  all 
blessing  to  change  the  dispensation,  and  taking  from  me 
the  light  of  his  love,  in  which  all  beauty  and  virtue  so  easily 
and  naturally  exist,  to  teach  me  that  the  glory  of  all  good 
belongs  to  Him  alone,  and  that  He  is  indeed  jealous  of  our 
decking  ourselves  with  his  jewels. 

Eleventh  Month,  1814. — How  hard,  but  how  necessary 


.ET.  29.] 


1816. 


37 


a  lesson  it  is,  to  learn  to  suffer  the  will  of  God  without  the 
consolations  of  his  Spirit — how  much  hai'dcr  than  to  do  his 
will  in  the  light  of  his  countenance  !  Permit  me  in  all  the 
dispensations  of  Thy  providence  to  learn  wisdom,  and  feelingly 
to  know  this — that  all  wisdom  is  from  above.  Unless  we 
were  sometimes  left  to  ourselves,  we  could  hardly  know  this 
great  truth, — that  we  are  poor,  weak,  miserable,  and  blind. 

Subsequently  to  this  period  her  father's  family  was 
visited  by  severe  affliction.  Her  two  only  brothers, 
Joseph  and  Henry,  young  men  of  great  promise,  were 
removed  by  death  just  as  they  were  entering  upon 
manhood.  These  affecting  events  occurred  in  1815  and 
1816;  and  in  the  following  year  her  sister  Rachel  died 
at  Nice,  after  a  long  and  suffering  illness. 

The  winter  of  1815-16  w^as  passed  by  H.  C.  Back- 
house at  Exmouth,  whither  she  went  to  help  in  the  care 
of  her  invalid  sister.  A  third  child,  her  daughter  A  nn, 
was  here  added  to  the  family. 

Exmouth,  22nd  of  2nd  mo.,  1816. 

My  Dearest, 

It  is  a  great  comfort  to  hear  so  good  an 
account  of  thee,  and  that  we  are  in  thy  mind  so  often, 
and  in  a  manner  that  is  so  consoling  in  the  pain  of  sepa- 
ration. I  do  indeed  crave  thy  preservation  every  way, 
and  the  belief  that  we  may  be  stronger  together  than  when 
separated  is  a  sweet  idea,  though  it  makes  the  seriousness  of 
separation  the  greater,  and  requires  a  strong  confidence  in  our 
motives  for  it  to  render  it  justifiable. 

Dear  Jonathan  is  a  sweet  companion.  When  I  told  him 
in  a  cheerful  way  that  thou  wast  in  London  with  his  grand- 
mamma, his  enquiries  were  very  earnest,  and  his  voice  soon 
faltered,  so  that  I  thought  it  wisest  to  leave  the  subject. 
I  feel  very  peaceful  in  being  here,  and  cannot  question  its 
propriety.  Since  this  last  attack,  I  think  there  is  an  increase 
of  disease  in  poor  llachel. 


38 


1820. 


[.CT.  33. 


Aunt  Jane  and  tlie  cliildren  have  high  romps  together; 
they  seem  a  great  relaxation  to  her,  and  no  cue  makes  the 
babe  more  merry  than  she  does. 

Exraoutli,  19tli  of  3rcl  mo.,  1816. 

My  Dearest, 

I  delayed  writing  yesterday,  in  the  expec- 
tation of  doing  so  with  more  zest  after  the  receipt  of  thy 
letter  this  morning,  and  I  have  not  been  disappointed.  Thy 
letters  are  quite  a  feast  to  me,  for  my  heart  sometimes  sinks 
at  the  vacancy  thy  absence  leaves.  It  did  yesterday,  at  times, 
more  than  usual. 

After  breakfast  I  took  Jonathan  and  Jane  to  the  shore. 
It  was  luxuriously  warm — the  tide  was  full  and  the  sea  calm ; 
vessels  sailing  about,  and  the  opposite  coast  very  conspicuous, 
making  it  one  of  the  finest  views  I  ever  beheld.  I  felt  more 
alive  to  the  beauty  of  the  scenery  than  I  often  am,  and  was 
cheered  in  seeing  my  dear  babes  enjoying  themselves  this 
sweet  day. 

I  have  been  hearing  Jonathan  his  lesson  almost  every  day 
since  thou  mentioned  it ;  but  he  is  neither  very  apt  nor  very 
willing  just  now. 

With  dear  love  to  you, 

Most  truly  thine, 

H.  C.  Backhouse. 

First  Month,  1820. — Our  brother,  Edward  Backhouse,  gone 
to  Sunderland,  with  the  thought  of  residing  there,  a  thing 
felt  seriously  and  tenderly ;  considerations  also  about  our 
moving  into  his  house.  Felt  the  importance  of  such  steps ; 
yet,  perhaps  we  think  more  about  them  than  is  desirable.  I 
have  longed  that  light,  not  selfishness,  may  direct  us  in  them  ; 
and,  though  there  is  a  right  position  for  all  things  in  this 
worldj  and  much  of  our  spiritual  and  temporal  interest  may 
depend  upon  it,  yet  oh  !  that  we  may  not  give  them  more 
than  tlicir  due  place  in  our  minds. 


^T.  33.] 


1820. 


39 


Third  Month. — Moved  into  my  brother  Edward's  house 
(South-End),  in  which  I  have  felt  comfortable  and  satisfied. 

Spent  the  day  with  my  husband,  going  to  Staindrop 
Meeting  and  Cockfield.  ***** 

After  returning  from  a  visit  to  Sunderland,  H.  C. 
Backhouse  writes  : — 

I  had  felt  for  some  time,  and  particularly  of  late,  a  warm 
concern  for  the  religious  interest  of  our  family  circle,  which, 
to  my  humiliation,  surprise,  and  consolation,  I  was  strength- 
ened to  express  in  a  private  opportunity  with  them  before  I 
left  Sunderland. 

On  our  ride  home,  I  felt  the  candle  of  the  Lord  shine 
round  about  me  in  a  manner  I  had  not  done  for  years, 
accompanied  with  much  tenderness,  and  some  foreboding 
fears.  I  felt  I  had  put  my  hand  to  the  plough,  and  must  not 
look  back ;  but  I  remembered  the  days  that  are  past,  and 
I  knew  something  of  the  power  of  Him  in  whom  I  had 
believed. 

Many  removals  and  changes  in  this  meeting  [Darlington] 
throw  me  into  a  new  and  important  sphere,  which  has  brought 
me  into  some  feeling.  I  see  I  ought  to  be,  what  is  likely  to 
fall  to  my  lot,  an  overseer.  My  heart  has  burned  as  an  oven  ; 
internal  and  external  supplications  have  not  been  wanting 
to  ease  it.    May  I  endure  the  burnings  as  I  ought ! 

In  allusion  to  attending  the  Yearly  Meeting  in 
London  soon  afterwards,  she  remarks  : — 

For  the  young  people  I  felt  a  new  and  unusual  interest. 
On  one  occasion  I  believe  I  ought  to  have  spoken,  for  the 
subject  was  pretty  clear  before  me,  and  my  mind  could 
receive  no  sense  of  good  all  the  day.    *    *    *  * 

I  afterwards  spoke  twice  in  the  Women's  Yearly  Meeting, 
and  the  composure  at  the  moment,  and  after  a  time  the  sense 
of  peace  which  ensued,  seemed  to  assure  me  that  I  had  not 
run  without  being  sent.    The  remembrance  of  former  days 


40 


1820. 


[.Ki:  33. 


came  strongly  before  rac,  and  in  thus  again  publicly  mani- 
festing the  intent  of  my  heart  I  felt  the  comfort  of  being  no 
stranger  to  that  hand  which,  as  it  once  fed  me  with  milk, 
seemed  to  me  now,  after  a  long  night  season,  to  be  feeding 
me  with  meat. 

After  the  Yearly  Meeting  was  over,  I  attended  a  meeting 
of  dear  Betsy's  [Elizabeth  J.  Fry]  about  her  prison  discipline, 
which  was  very  interesting. 

In  the  First-day  morning  meeting,  at  Plaistow,  it  seemed 
so  clear  to  me  that  I  should  speak,  that  I  ventured  to  do  so. 
I  was  favoured,  though  in  deep  fear,  with  a  conscious  upright- 
ness of  soul,  and  with  a  marked  concurrence  in  the  minds  of 
those  I  dearly  love,  my  own  mother's  especially,  though 
both  she  and  my  dear  husband  were  much  affected  by  it.  The 
sense  of  love  and  liberty  in  my  own  soul  afterwards,  made  it 
ready  to  enjoy  the  company  I  was  in  during  the  remainder 
of  the  day. 

Ari'ived  at  home  the  20th  of  Sixth  Month.  It  was  a  treat 
indeed  to  me  to  have  all  my  dear  little  ones  together,  aud  to 
find  them  pretty  well. 

Seventh  Month. — The  trivial  things  of  this  world  have 
somewhat  oppressed  me.  Is  not  my  spirituality  on  the 
borders  of  idleness  and  love  of  self-indulgence?  Have  been 
working  hard  with  my  dear  mother  on  house-linen  and 
settling  my  house,  with  a  heart  so  sunk  as  to  be  very  un- 
willing to  attend  to  these  necessary  things ;  but  I  hope  they 
may  be  in  better  order  than  they  have  been.  I  often  see  the 
virtue  and  excellency  of  active  life,  and  feel  the  pressure  of 
another.  However,  I  live  in  the  faith  and  hope  that  both  may 
brighten. 

As  to  spirituals,  the  thought  had  rather  beset  me,  how,  if 
it  were  required  of  me,  should  I  ever  be  able  to  kneel  down 
[in  vocal  prayer]  at  meeting ;  but  this  mountain  has  been 
removed,  and  a  sweet  flow  of  peace  and  love  returned  into 
ray  bosom. 

A  heavy  trial  now  awaited  J.  and  H.  C.  Backliouse 
in  the  death  of  their  son  Jonathan,  a  lovely  boy,  eight 


.CT.  33.] 


1820. 


41 


years  of  age.  The  event  is  thus  alhuled  to  in  the 
journal  : — 

On  this  period  I  do  not  know  liow  to  dwell.  After  a  lin- 
gering illness  of  some  weeks,  which  did  not  make  us  par- 
ticularly anxious,  and  from  which  he  seemed  much  recovered 
— so  as  I  think  to  go  to  school  again — our  dear  eldest  child 
became  very  ill  ;  and,  after  the  best  medical  treatment,  in 
which  much  hope  was  given,  he  expired  in  a  convulsion  fit  in 
my  arms.  I  seemed  at  the  time  hardly  sensible  of  the  depth 
of  the  sorrow.  Dear  E.  Fry,  being  in  the  north,  came  to  the 
funeral  and  preached  consolingly  at  meeting,  desiring  that  the 
language  of  our  minds  might  be,  "  Do  with  me  what  thou 
wilt,  only  make  me  what  thou  wouldst  have  me  to  be."  The 
meeting  had  been  peaceful  to  me,  and  I  believe  I  was  kept 
from  undue  excitement.  At  the  head  of  the  grave,  light  arid 
love  filled  my  soul,  and  I  was  soon  enabled  to  express  my 
desire  that  we  might  humbly  return  thanks  for  the  mercies 
we  had  received. 

We  had  a  sweet  evening  with  many  of  our  friends,  whose 
sympathy  has  been  precious,  and  has  brought  them  very  near 
to  me.  But  oh  !  the  loss  is  great,  and  the  separation  bitter. 
He  was  a  truly  tender-spirited,  sweet  child  ;  I  was  not 
worthy  of  him.  Had  w,e  in  all  our  ways  kept  nearer  the 
Fountain  of  light  and  love,  I  have  sometimes  thought — but 
it  has  not  deeply  oppressed  me — we  might  have  had  him  pre- 
served to  us.  But  he  is  gone  a  little  before  us,  and  the  belief 
in  a  re-union  after  death  has  at  times  been  consohng  to  me, 
W'here  transgression  is  washed  away  in  the  blood  of  the 
Lamb,  and  infinite  mercy  eternally  adored  in  perfect  and 
inseparable  union  with  the  souls  that  we  have  loved. 

Memorandum  written  4th  of  Eleventh  Month,  1820. 

Oh  !  "  how  great  is  Thy  goodness  which  TIiou  hast  laid  up 
for  them  that  fear  Thee ;  which  Thou  hast  wrought  for  tliem 
that  trust  in  Thee  before  the  sons  of  men  \"  In  looking  back 
to  tl)e  last  two  or  three  months,  I  feel  T  may  adopt  this  lan- 
guage, although  in  them  I  have  known  the  greatest  portion 
of  suffering  that  it  has  yet  been  my  lot  to  taste. 


42 


1820. 


[^T.  33. 


To  Marta  Fox. 

Darlington,  ISth  of  11th  ino.,  1820. 

My  Dear  Maria, 

I  cannot  but  believe  that  we  have  both  of  us  of 
late  drunk  of  a  deeper  cup  of  suffering  than  either  has 
ever  tasted  before.  May  it  have  made  us  really  more  tender- 
hearted, and  therefore  more  alive  to  true  enjoyment  as  well  as 
suffering  !  My  life  seems  to  me  materially  changed  ;  the  home 
of  life  shaken,  in  so  much  nearer  an  acquaintance  with  death. 
It  has  been  deeply  affecting  to  me  ;  but  at  moments,  the  hope 
beyond  it  has  entered  most  consolingly  and  cheeringly  into 
my  heart. 

How  many  who  have  been  bone  of  our  bone  and  flesh  of 
our  flesh,  and  with  whose  minds  we  may  have  been  as 
intimately  acquainted  as  with  our  own,  have  now  entered  an 
unchangeable  state,  and  may  we  not  humbly  trust,  have, 
through  much  conflict  and  tribulation,  been  permitted  to 
unite  with  the  song  of  the  redeemed  ! 

The  journal  is  resumed  : — 

Soon  after  this  event,  my  dear  brother  and  sister  Birkbeck 
came  to  us  at  Seaton,  where  we  had  removed  for  a  week  or 
two  on  account  of  the  children's  health.  It  proved  no  time 
of  rest,  for  our  dear  Henry  took  cold,  and  had  a  severe 
illness  for  some  weeks.  Inexpressibly  kind  and  tender  was 
my  dear  sister  in  this  my  deeply-tried  state  of  mind ;  for  the 
illness  of  my  beloved  child  made  me  tremblingly  alive  to 
every  touch.  The  excellence  of  her  natural  powers,  as  weD 
as  the  sweetness  of  her  disposition  and  consideration  for 
others,  was  very  striking.  There  was  a  deep  gravity,  a 
carelessness  of  passing  and  inferior  objects,  that  I  thought 
portended  change — I  fondly  hoped  a  substantial  change — from 
the  pursuit  of  earthly  things,  in  whatever  form  they  had 
attracted  her,  to  the  pursuit  and  possession  of  heavenly  things ; 
but  this,  in  the  manner  I  had  desired,  I  was  not  to  see. 

I  was  going  on  in  my  various  relationships  more  comfortably 
than  usual,  when,  after  some  favourable  accounts  of  my  dear 


xi\  34.] 


1821. 


43 


sister's  confinement  with  a  son,  we  received  another— of  her 
being  very  ill ;  and,  after  a  suspense  of  some  days,  in  which 
hope  was  uppermost,  one  of  no  hope.  At  North  Allerton  [on 
our  road  to  Norwich]  the  account  of  her  death  reached  us. 
It  deeply  affected  me. 

After  attending  the  funeral : — 

I  visited  my  dear  cousin  Priscilla  Gurney,  in  the  last  stage 
of  consumption.  Her  mind  was  peaceful  and  clear.  "  Be 
faithful,  there  is  nothing  like  it,"  was  among  the  few  sen- 
tences I  heard  her  speak. 

Whilst  under  the  pressure  of  these  sorrows  an  alarm- 
ing account  of  Jonathan  Backhouse's  father  induced 
them  to  set  off  hastily  for  home.  The  exertion  was  too 
much  for  her,  and  they  were  obliged  to  stop  at  Peter- 
borough, where  she  became  seriously  ill.  Her  father 
and  mother  soon  came  to  her,  and  the  wise  and  skilful 
nursing  of  the  latter  materially  promoted  her  recovery. 
The  three  weeks  thus  passed  was  a  time  of  much  suffer- 
ing to  herself,  and  of  great  anxiety  to  her  watchful 
attendants. 

Looking  back  upon  this  period,  after  describing  her 
bodily  and  mental  suffering,  she  says  : — 

A  visit  from  dear  Jonathan  Hutchinson  brought  a  feeling 
of  peace  and  refreshment  over  my  mind,  which  seemed  for  a 
time  to  heal  it,  and  once  or  twice  I  felt  tendered  by  my  dear 
father's  readings,  and  by  the  sweetness  and  power  of  his 
prayers.  1  could  bear  but  little  reading,  hardly  anything  but 
the  Bible,  and  the  simple  narrative  suited  me  best. 

When  well  enough  to  be  removed,  H.  C.  Backhouse 
returned  to  Norwich,  and  afterwards  went  to  Cromer, 
where  her  health  gradually  impi'oved.  Of  the  time  spent 
in  Norfolk  she  writes  : — 

I  had  little  comfort  in  my  own  mind,  but  ray  dear  parents 
were  inexpressibly  near  and  dear  to  me,  and  I  could  often 


44 


1821. 


[^T.  34. 


enjoy  their  company,  and  regret  that  the  great  care  of  myself, 
and  my  weakness,  kept  me  so  much  from  them.  One  morning, 
after  the  reading  in  my  room,  my  dear  father  sweetly  returned 
thanks  for  my  recovery,  and  in  terms  which  I  forget,  seemed 
to  devote  me  to  the  service  of  his  Lord. 

I  went  to  the  Quarterly  Meeting  at  Norwich,  in  so  low  a 
state  of  body  as  to  have  hardly  power  for  a  serious  thought ; 
however,  I  was  enabled  to  discharge  what  I  felt  as  a  debt 
from  me  to  the  meeting,  in  a  supplication  that  seemed  like 
a  renewed  bond  to  devote  myself  to  a  service  which  I  have 
been  made  to  love.  The  deep  flow  of  peace  into  ray  own 
heart  during  the  rest  of  the  day  was  a  sweet  confirmation 
to  me.  I  spent  some  part  of  it  with  my  father,  when  the 
rest  were  gone  to  the  meeting  for  business.  I  think  I  hardly 
ever  felt  such  union  of  spirit  and  love  and  tenderness  as  I  did 
in  those  hours  with  him.  He  said  he  could  scarcely  refrain 
from  tears  all  day. 

We  spent  three  interesting  weeks  in  Norwich,  nursing  my 
dear  father,  who  suffered  much,  and  at  times  he  appeared  so 
ill  as  almost  to  alarm  us.  It  often  afforded  sweet  opportu- 
nities of  being  with  him  ;  and  how  I  did  delight  in  his  spirit 
and  humility ! 

One  day  I  had  an  interesting  ride  alone  with  him  to  North 
Walsham,  where  he  was  led  to  minister  a  good  deal  in  a  very 
small  meeting,  and  joining  with  him  in  heart  and  word  was 
very  sweet  to  me.  On  our  return,  he  touched  upon  his 
family  losses,  and  the  consolations  which  he  had  received 
under  them. 

To  HER  Husband. 

Grove,  .5lh  of  4tli  mo.,  1821. 

I  truly  believe  that  the  more  faithful  we  are  to 
our  Lord  and  Master,  the  more  we  shall  love  and  be  united 
to  each  other. 

Thy  account  of  the  visit  to   was  sweet  to  me. 

Implicitly  obey  thy  Master,  and  every  time  we  receive  such 
warning  and  encouragement,  surely  it  is  a  strong  call  to  trust 
in  Him  more  fully  on  occasions  which  may  afterwards  present 


-CT.  35.] 


1822. 


themselves.  It  is  not  a  day  to  hide  our  talent  in  a  napkin. 
Surely  if  any  people  have  been  visited,  Ave  have.  Let  us, 
therefore,  be  endeavouring  to  render  according  to  the  benefit 
received.  We  must  not  look  too  much  at  what  others  do. 
It  is  to  our  own  Master  we  stand  or  fall ;  and  the  more  we 
follow  Him  with  a  single  eye,  the  more  we  shall  be  permitted 
to  feel  united  to  those  who  are  endeavouring  to  walk  by  the 
same  rule,  though  He  may  see  meet  to  give  us  different 
stations  in  the  church.  So  I  believe  we  shall  be  led  to  prize 
our  friends,  though  not  doing  as  we  do,  because  we  may  see 
them  at  their  own  posts,  guarding  against  the  enemy  in  a 
different  quarter,  which  may  leave  us  more  at  liberty  for  ours. 

I  am  sure  in  the  course  of  my  life  I  can  set  my  seal  to  this 
truth, — that  it  is  in  the  day  of  the  Lord^s  power,  his  people 
are  made  a  willing  people,  and  I  do  desire  that,  in  this  his 
day,  when  He  is  again  manifesting  his  power  on  our  souls, 
we  may  make  use  of  this  willingness  to  follow  Him  with 
alacrity,  whithersoever  He  may  please  to  lead  us. 

After  leaving  Norfolk,  the  journal  continues  : — 

On  arriving  at  home,  I  think  I  may  say,  peace  and  thank- 
fulness covered  my  heart.  I  did  enjoy  being  there  once 
again,  and  after  the  intense  suffering — I  do  not  think  the 
term  too  strong — thati  have  passed  through,  the  pause  seemed 
delightful.  I  was  still  very  weak,  and  had  my  household 
almost  entirely  to  arrange  again,  which  took  all  the  time  and 
attention  I  was  equal  to.  These  new  arrangements  cost 
me  some  serious  thought  about  manner  of  living.  I  had 
begun  to  feel  that  Christian  discipline  should  extend  to 
this  part  of  our  conduct,  and  that  perhaps  no  circumstances 
warrant  its  being  sumptuous. 

The  meetings  now  became  very  interesting  to  me,  and  as 
the  reward  of  what  I  am  induced  to  believe  was  faithfulness, 
they  were  greatly  refreshing.  I  went  to  the  Quarterly 
Meeting  at  Newcastle;  the  sense  of  religious  exercise  was 
hardly  off  my  mind ;  one  thing  succeeded  another,  but  I 
believe  I  had  the  unity  of  Friends.  Attended  a  funeral  at 
Bishop  Auckland ;  I  think  I  saw  that  had  I  been  a  little 


40 


1822 


[^:t.  35. 


more  patient  under  exercise  I  might  liave  done  better ;  but  I 
had  some  sweet  staidness  of  mind  and  peaee  after  speaking 
in  the  meeting. 

Fifth-day,  \4:th  of  ^nd  mo.,  182.2. — At  meeting  to-day 
no  words  ;  I  felt  quiet  and  refreshed  afterwards.  Found 
a  young  friend  whom  I  called  upon,  had  stayed  at  home 
[from  meeting]  pleading  being  busy  with  writing  and  other 
things.  Doubtful  whether  to  admonish.  In  virtue  of  my 
office  [as  overseer] ,  and  perhaps  of  my  own  feelings,  I  think 
I  must. 

Fifth-day,  2lst  of  2nd  mo. — Did  (not  a  little  in  the  cross) 
what  I  thought  I  was  bid,  which  was  kindly  received, 
and  I  think  tended  to  the  peace  of  my  own  mind.  I  long 
to  see  a  deeper  frame  of  spirit  pervade  people  after  meeting. 
Some  satisfaction  this  week  in  visiting  the  poor. 

First-day,  7th  of  3rd  mo. — In  the  afternoon  meeting  a 
subject  seemed  so  clear  before  me  that  I  ventured  to  speak  ; 
but  oh  !  the  evil  of  my  heart,  the  consciousness  of  having, 
or  supposing  I  had,  chosen  my  words  well,  was  like  the  fly 
in  the  ointment  of  the  apothecary,  the  baneful  effects  of 
which  I  felt  many  days  after.  The  more  I  see  of  my  own 
mind,  the  more  I  am  conscious  of  impurity.  May  the  lan- 
guage of  my  soul  be,  "  If  Thou  wilt.  Thou  canst  make  me 
clean." 

A  visit  from  my  dear  cousin  Rachel  Pease,  and  Mary 
Cudworth,  humbling  and  sweet  to  me. 

\^th  of  3rd  mo. — Went  with  my  dear  husband  and 
brother  John  to  Auckland ;  I  felt  my  inexperience  in  the 
service,  had  many  fears  of  having  exceeded  my  commis- 
sion, or  of  not  being  patient  enough  in  it,  yet  on  returning 
home  felt  sweet  peace,  and  dear  love  and  unity  with  my 
husband,  who  was  much  in  the  same  state ;  glad  of  my 
brother  John's  company,  and  was  sensible  of  his  deeper 
spiritual  gifts. 

6th  of  5th  mo. — Last  night  I  did  not  keep  close  enough 
to  my  Guide  in  prayer,  on  account  of  which  I  felt  some 
distress ;  perhaps  not  altogether  wrong,  but  had  not  stopped 
when  I  ought,  nor  w-aited  sufficiently  for  clearness  and 
strength  in  the  exercise.    I  hope  I  shall  not  hurt  others. 

6th  of  6th  mo. — A  month  has  now  passed  in  which  at 


^T.  36.]  1823.  47 

times  T  have  been  enabled  to  enjoy  the  h)ve  of  God  and 
man  in  my  heart.  A  sweet  parting  First-day  with  our  friends 
going  to  the  Yearly  Meeting.  Some  interesting  ministerial 
engagements,  if  I  may  call  them  so,  following  dedication  to 
gentle  pointings  of  duty.  How  much  soever  I  may  enjoy 
the  feast  of  fat  things,  I  have  learnt  to  fear  its  effects  on 
a  disposition  such  as  my  own,  not  naturally  humble. 

Came  to  Harrowgate  with  all  our  family  on  the  5th,  for 
my  benefit  and  dear  Gurney's,  still  a  delicate  child.  I 
think  we  are  both  better,  and,  if  there  be  anything  in  the 
exercise  of  gifts,  it  has  led  to  some  and  not  very  exalting 
service.  Where  and  what  am  I  ?  Can  I  ever  pursue  the  path 
I  have  been  led  into,  in  humility  and  self-denial,  as  well  as 
faith  ?  How  tempest-tossed  my  mind  has  been,  and  yet  at 
times  may  I  say  sweetly  comforted  !  Some  meetings  precious, 
though  I  have  gone  to  them  in  the  sense  of  great  bodily  and 
mental  weakness. 

Darlmgto7i,  Wth  of  Wth  mo. — At  Harrowgate,  my  dear 
cousin  Rachel  Pease  brought  me  the  news  of  our  Monthly 
Meeting  having  very  unanimously  recommended  me  to  the 
meeting  of  ministers  and  elders.  I  felt  it  a  great  relief, 
and  also  1  trust  humbling ;  this  mark  of  approval  was  very 
sweet  to  me. 

Have  been  gradually  improving  in  health,  and  I  trust  in 
some  stability  of  mind,  though  it  has  been  often  much  tossed. 
To-day  my  dear  father  and  mother  left  us.  It  has  been  pecu- 
liarly interesting  to  have  them  here;  but  their  being  in  the 
decline  of  life,  and  ourselves  fully  arrived  at  the  meridian, 
has  been  affecting  to  me.  My  mother's  active  kindness  and 
consideration  for  our  comforts  great,  my  father's  uprightness 
and  simplicity  of  mind  very  striking ;  a  treat  to  hear  him 
again  [in  ministry],  and  to  have  his  unity  as  well  as  my 
dear  mother's. 

27th  of  \st  mo.,  1823. — My  husband's  concern  as  to 
the  ministry  becoming  very  heavy,  accompanied  with  much 
disquietude  from  not  having  given  way  to  what  he  had 
thought  too  slight  impressions,  I  have  ventured,  under  a 
belief  that  he  is  truly  called  to  it,  to  encourage  him  to  act ;  I 
have  had  much  satisfaction  in  doing  so,  as  I  dreaded  a  call, 
which  I  believed  to  be  a  right  one,  not  being  obeyed.  For 


1823. 


[.tT.  30. 


M'ant  of  yielding  to  these  gentle  intiiuatious  many,  I  believe, 
are  marred  on  the  wheel.  What  destruction  has  such  neglect 
made  in  the  peace  and  prosperity  of  individuals  and  of 
families  !  To  m}^  relief,  he  has  again  spoken  in  our  meeting, 
and  the  state  of  his  mind  has  assured  me  that  we  wei'e 
not  wrong;  still  it  is  a  fearful  thing,  and  v.e  had  need 
to  be  very  watchful.  Hom"  important  is  a  true  birth  in  the 
ministry !  may  none  neglect  such  a  day  of  visitation  !  If 
they  keep  humble  as  well  as  faithful,  they  will  no  doubt  be 
preserved,  to  their  own  unspeakable  consolation  in  Christ,  and 
to  that  of  others. 

20//i  of  2nd  mo. — Obliged  to  stay  at  home  this  morning 
from  a  slight  affection  on  the  chest,  which  added  to 
great  nervous  debility,  makes  me  pass  through  hours  of 
deep  suffering.  The  love  of  life  is  so  strong,  that  I  seem  as 
though  I  could  hardly  bend  with  submission  to  the  thought 
of  its  being  cut  off.  Sometimes  I  would  fain  believe  these 
feelings  are  but  a  baptism  for  service  and  for  the  trial  and 
refinement  of  self ;  and  then  I  fear  to  be  deluded  in  supposing 
myself  to  be  thus  wanted.  This  morning  I  remembered  the 
words,  "  Whatever  is  brought  upon  thee  take  cheei'fully,  and 
be  patient  when  thou  art  changed  to  a  low  estate."  In  every 
other  respect  except  this  plague  of  the  heart,  and  infirmity 
of  body,  how  I  am  blessed !  My  husband  I  believe  loving 
the  truth  and  growing  in  it,  and  truly  affectionate  to  me ; 
children  altogether  well  and  happy ;  surrounded  by  kind 
friends,  and  as  many  external  comforts  as  I  could  desire ;  and 
in  the  midst  of  this,  some  taste  of  better  things. 

27/A  of  2nd  mo. — A  very  interesting  conference  with  men 
Friends  at  the  Monthly  Meeting  at  Stockton,  to  which, 
though  feeling  very  weak,  I  thought  I  would  not  omit 
going.  In  it  Isaac  Stephenson  laid  before  us  the  prospect 
he  had  long  had  of  visiting  America.  I  have  not  often  been 
so  sensible  of  a  depth  of  feeling  and  sympathy,  in  myself 
and  in  those  present.  At  the  conclusion  I  felt  a  renewal 
of  strength  both  naturally  and  spiritually,  which  revived  my 
faith  in  the  Shepherd  and  Keeper  of  Israel,  and  in  the  truth 
that,  though  death  and  darkness  may  sui'rouud  us  for  a  time, 
the  eternal  life  of  the  soul  hid  with  Christ  in  God  is  no 
cunningly  devised  fable. 


36.] 


1823. 


49 


7th  of  37-d  mo. — I  have  felt  tliat  giving  way  to  depres- 
sion is  virtually  mistrusting  the  mercy  of  Him  for  whose 
pleasure  we  are  and  were  created.  We  had  better  tryio  be 
actively  engaged  if  we  can ;  though  not  so  earnestly  as  to 
draw  the  mind  from  its  centre. 

30th  of  4th  mo. — I  have  much  to  bind  me  to  this  earth. 
Its  cares  I  feel ;  but  perhaps  more  power  of  gratcfull}'' 
enjoying  its  blessings  is  wanted,  and  may  be  in  store  for  me 
before  I  leave  it.  A  pleasant  call  from  a  friend ; — some  minds 
seem  deeply  anchored  in  the  truth,  meekly  and  patiently 
bearing  the  trials  of  the  day  with  firmer  faith  and  greater 
purity  than  others ;  but  each  heart  alone  knows  its  own 
bitterness,  and  I  believe  there  is  never  high  attainment  with- 
out much  suffering.  In  weakness  of  body  and  fear  of  mind,  I 
entered  upon  the  Yearly  Meeting.  The  select  meetings  being 
new  to  me,  subjected  me  to  fresh  conflict  ;  but  I  think  I 
derived  instruction  as  well  as  comfort  from  attending  them. 
Being  chosen  to  assist  at  the  table  in  the  women's  meeting, 
I  managed,  I  believe,  to  read  audibly  the  little  which 
there  was  for  me  to  do.  In  the  midst  of  all  my  soul's 
enemies,  it  yielded  some  satisfaction  to  myself:  the  post,  I 
believe,  was  an  instructive  one  to  me.  For  want  of  faith  and 
promptness  in  the  first  place,  and  afterwards  for  want  of 
patience,  either  to  let  the  matter  drop,  or  to  find  a  more 
suitable  opportunity  for  expressing  it,  I  sadly  ill-timed  a  con- 
cern ;  for  which  I  was  most  publicly,  though  not  personally,  set 
down.  I  saw  I  had  been  wrong,  aud  thought  the  wounds  of  a 
friend  better  than  the  kisses  of  an  enemy :  it  might  have  its 
use  in  humbling  me.  Oh  !  for  a  due  spirit  of  subjection,  free 
from  slavish  fear  of  man,  or  a  looking  to  any  other  than  the 
great  Head  of  the  Church. 

In  returning  home  we  spent  part  of  First-day  at  Doncaster, 
and  in  our  measure  had  much  service.  We  set  off'  just 
before  the  afternoon  meeting,  which  left  a  sting  that  I  hope 
we  shall  not  soon  forget.  May  it  be  a  lesson  in  futui'e  to 
beware  how  we  violate  soob^aous  a  duty  as  that  of  attending 
our  meetings  regularly,  or  break  unnecessarily  the  quiet  and 
orderly  spending  of  the  Fii'st-day.  The  Yearly  Meeting's 
Epistle  was  very  good  on  the  subject  this  year. 

E 


50 


1823. 


[.ET.  3G. 


Some  weeks  of  this  suninicr  and  autumn  were  spent 
with  her  parents  bj  the  sea-side. 

First-day,  17 th  of  Sth  mo. — Went  to  our  Cromer  meeting. 
All  our  family  circle,  and  many  besides,  not  Friends, 
were  present.  I  felt  sitting  down  among  them,  but  was 
strengthened  to  do  what  I  believe  was  my  duty,  and  had 
peace  after  it ;  but  oh  !  the  dangers  attending  such  a  mind 
as  mine.  Keep  Thou  the  door  of  my  lips,  and  may  the  praise 
be  alone  thine  !  I  wish  these  services  to  pass  off  my  mind, 
and  all  curiosity  as  to  the  impression  on  others  to  be  subdued  ; 
for  there  is  danger  in  it. 

22nd.— The  common  routine  of  the  day  has  passed 
more  peacefully  and  cheerfully  than  often.  Meetings 
interesting. 

24^A. — Felt  low  and  condemned  for  offering  unformed 
opinions.  Paid  one  or  two  religious  visits,  which,  after  a 
time,  brought  a  ray  of  peace  over  my  mind,  as  did  also  some 
services  in  our  little  meeting  here  ;  but  oh,  the  mending  our 
own  net :  I  often  feel  mine  full  of  holes, — the  little  I  converse 
about  not  always  in  a  right  and  charitable  spirit,  nor  esteem- 
ing others  better  than  myself. 

We  left  Cromer  on  the  6th  of  Tenth  Month,  after  an  in- 
teresting farewell  meeting,  and  parting  with  our  friends. 

Seaton,  20M  of  12th  mo. — Since  I  last  wrote,  my  husband 
has  been  confined  for  several  weeks  by  an  intermittent  fever ; 
many  very  trying  anxious  moments,  much  fag  both  of  body 
and  mind.  Patience,  thou  hast  been  tried,  and  thy  stock  not 
found  sufficient ! 

Children,  and  the  education  of  them,  a  subject  of  too  much 
anxiety.  Too  sensible  perhaps  of  idleness  and  awkwardness; 
too  earnest  for,  and  valuing  too  highly,  intellectual  cultiva- 
tion, easy  action,  and  decorum  of  manner. 

Find  a  pleasant  friend  in  my  new  sister  Katharine  Back- 
house. Monthly  Meeting  interesting  to  me  :  I  should  have 
better  faith  in  my  own  judgment  of  it  if  I  felt  it  so  while 
inactive  ;  for  I  observe  inactive  members  generally  think  the 
times  low.  Oh  self !  thou  art  the  very  serpent  in  my  way, 
and  wheresoever  this  foot  of  mine  doth  tread,  thou  liest 


.KT.  36.]  1823.  51 

before  it.  Desired  that  Friends  might  never  hear  the  seeond 
query  (that  on  love)  read  without  a  deep  self-cxaminatiou 
how  far  they  kept  a  conscience  void  of  offence  in  this  im- 
portant matter.  Good  need  have  I  to  take  the  lesson  home  : 
let  me  deeply  examine  myself  on  it !  Refreshed  by  the 
retirement  of  this  place. 

In  the  course  of  this  year  her  husband  was  acknow- 
ledged as  a  minister  by  DarUngton  Monthly  Meeting  ; 
and  thus  was  the  call  of  both  of  them  to  that  Gospel 
service  in  which  they  were,  during  the  rest  of  their 
joint  lives,  so  often  unitedly  engaged  to  labour,  fully 
recognized  by  the  Church. 


e3 


52 


1824. 


[yET.  37. 


CHAPTER  IV. 

DOMESTIC  CARES  RELIGIOUS    DUTIES  ILLNESS    OF    HER  HUSBAND  

DEATH  OF  HER  SECOND  SON  BIRTH  OF  HER  YOITNGEST  RENEWED 

HEALTH  BUSINESS  AFFAIRS. 

31*/  of  1st  mo.,  1824. — Encouraged  by  reading  the  Life 
of  Lady  Maxwell.  The  feeling  of  fellowship  with  those  out 
of  our  own  pale  is  very  enlarging  and  comforting.  *  *  * 
The  love  of  riches  an  enemy  we  need  guard  against.  Many 
questions  arise  out  of  these  things.  Oh !  that  truth  may 
help  and  support  usj  whatever  man  may  say  of  us.  Children, 
servants,  houses  and  lands, — all  have  been  a  subject  of  some 
anxious  thought. 

lOlh  of  2nd  mo. — Oh !  my  wandering  thoughts  and 
desires ;  hard  to  know  where  proper  attention  ends  and 
undue  earnestness  begins.  At  the  Monthly  Meeting,  peti- 
tioned against  the  power  of  the  enemy.  He  was  very  busy 
with  me  all  day,  though  now  and  then  a  gleam  of  peace. 

12//i  ofZrd  mo. — Rode  with  my  husband  to  Hurworth,  to 
call  on  a  distressed  gentleman  and  lady,  and  few  sacrifices 
(for  such  I  felt  it  to  be,  having  long  thought  it  my  duty  to  go) 
have  given  me  more  peace,  and  the  hope  that  one  day  my 
love  for  and  ease  with  those  not  within  the  pale  of  our  Society 
may  increase.  Often  tried  with  my  incompetency  to  manage 
my  girls :  anxious  to  do  right  towards  them,  and  give  thera 
the  advantage  of  a  substantial  education ;  but  oh  !  for  the 
government  of  the  temper. 

Fourth-day. — This  day  has  been  one  of  external  and  internal 
sunshine.  The  meeting  to  me  sweet :  said  a  few  words  in  it 
much  to  my  comfort.  The  burden  of  my  desire  was  for 
young  people  to  become  really  Christians,  by  being  able  to 
call  God  father,  through  that  spirit  of  adoption  which  is 
given  by  a  new  birth, — that  they  may  truly  know  Him  as 
their  guide,  counsellor,  and  friend,  in  the  important  matters 
in  which  they  may  have  to  decide.  I  felt  this  especially  with 
regard  to  marriage,  though  I  did  not  say  so.  A  sweet  walk 
afterwards  with  ray  sister  Katharine. 


JKT.  37.] 


1821. 


53 


Seventh-day. — Attended  a  Committee  of  the  Female 
Charity.    A  day  of  peace  and  satisfaction. 

First-day. — Deeply  exercising ;  a  stranger  present  being, 
I  believe,  the  cause  of  it.  His  company  afterwards  convinced 
me  I  was  not  mistaken.  The  redemption  of  the  soul  is 
precious.  What  fools  men  are  to  halt  between  two  opinions, 
when  the  love  of  God  shows  them  what  they  ought  to  be  ! 

Attended  the  Quarterly  Meeting  at  Sunderland  through 
much  bodily  infirmity.  Was  engaged  in  supplication  for  the 
rich,  some  of  whom  being  present  interested  me  a  good  deal. 
At  Sunderland  my  husband  was  taken  ill  with  ague, — a 
severe  attack,  which  lasted  with  little  intermission  for  nearly 
a  mouth.  It  was  a  trying  time  to  me.  Poorly  myself,  I 
could  scarcely  be  of  any  use  to  him,  and  felt  T  was  adding 
much  to  the  trouble  of  my  brother's  house.  All  my  habits 
of  being  waited  upon  seemed  to  rise  up  to  reproach  me ;  and 
yet  I  was  afraid  of  exerting  myself.  Forbearance  and  kind- 
ness were  truly  manifested  towards  us.  With  all  this  sense  of 
weakness,  and  wants,  both  natural  and  spiritual,  I  was  not 
seldom  engaged  in  the  exercise  of  my  gift.  Our  kind  brother 
Richardson,  at  whose  house  we  were,  came  home  with  us.  To 
my  acute  feelings,  the  fine  fresh  air  of  the  country,  the  verdure 
of  the  spring,  and  the  scent  of  the  flowers,  were  truly  refreshing, 
and  being  with  the  dear  children  was  a  cause  for  thankfulness. 
I  injured  myself,  I  think  for  some  time,  by  not  seriously 
acknowledging  it  in  my  own  house  ;  fear  of  doing  too  much, 
and  of  being  led  by  nature  rather  than  grace, — want  of  faith- 
fulness, in  reality, — prevailing.  My  brother  William  left 
us  for  the  Continent  on  the  28th  of  Fourth  Month ;  an 
interesting  parting,  in  which  my  religious  courage  was  put  to 
some  proof.  Days  have  passed  in  my  family  very  comfortably; 
a  sense  of  more  health  than  for  some  time,  exhilarating.  I  do 
not  remember  any  spring  in  which  I  have  been  so  capable  of 
enjoying  the  sweets  of  nature,  which  the  fine  weather  has 
beautifully  displayed.  Our  garden  looking  lovely,  and  the 
children  playing  about  and  enjoying  themselves,  a  true 
pleasure  to  me.  A  little  sound  health,  how  superior  an 
indulgence  to  the  most  downy  bed  ! 

20th  of  7th  mo. — Much  encouraged  about  my  dear  girls, 
who  seem  going  on  with  great  energy  and  good-humour. 


54 


1821.. 


[/ET.  37. 


10th  mo.,  Third-day. — A  religious  opportunity  with  dear 
Joseph  [J.  J.  Gurney].  An  interesting,  encouraging,  and 
very  affecting  time ;  Avceping  was  a  great  relief  to  me, — the 
promise  of  coming  out  of  all  my  valleys  cheering,  and  in  some 
bitter  moments  since  has  revived  to  my  comfort  and  hope. 

Joseph's  company  very  interesting  to  me.  I  could  not 
but  admire  his  almost  unparalleled  excellency  of  spirit,  of 
understanding,  and  of  nature,  gifts  and  graces, — talents  cul- 
tivated to  so  much  active  usefulness.  We  parted  in  much 
love. 

ISth  qfWth  mo. — My  dear  Gurney  very  ill,  at  times  alarm- 
ingly so.  Myself  remarkably  well,  and  generally  preserved 
in  a  tz'anquillity  and  even  cheerfulness  of  mind,  M'hich,  under 
my  present  circumstances,  might  make  me  ready  to  exclaim, 
"It  is  the  Lord's  doing,  and  it  is  marvellous  in  my  eyes  !  " 

My  sister  Emma  came  to  us  on  the  inst.,  when  it  seemed 

hardly  likely  the  dear  child  would  live  long.  A  most 
acceptable  moment.  Her  company  very  valuable  to  me. 
An  interesting  visit  and  parting  with  our  dear  friends  Anna 
Forster  and  Abigail  Dockray. 

I  expressed  in  meeting  on  First-day  my  own  state  of  mind, 
or  what  at  least  I  desired  it  might  be, — that  come  what  may, 
we  might  answer  the  end  of  our  being,  and  bring  glory  to 
Him  who  created  us  for  that  purpose.  I  felt  jealous  of 
myself,  lest  I  might  be  too  much  prompted  by  circumstances  ; 
but  though  fearful,  did  not  feel  condemned  in  it. 

— Our  dear  child  died  on  the  23rd,  and  was  buried 
on  the  26th.  I  think  I  may  say  I  have  been  mercifully 
dealt  with  and  supported  in  this  deep  and  awfully  trying 
time, — health  to  pay  him  much  personal  attention,  and 
composure  of  mind  to  take  the  many  alleviations  of  the 
present  hour ;  and,  when  he  could  bear  it  (which  was  often 
the  case),  to  be  his  cheerful  and  amusing  companion.  This 
and  many  other  comforts  I  believe  I  can  acknowledge  as 
mercies  not  at  our  command ;  yet  I  have  had  to  pass  through 
many  hours  when  the  waves  completely  covered  my  head, 
and  when,  in  the  proving  of  faith  and  patience,  the  day  seemed 
as  if  it  could  not  dawn. 

\Wi  of  2nd  mo.,  1825. — My  dear  little  Edmund  is  now 
nearly  twelve  weeks  old, — a  fine,  fat,  flourishing  babe.  A 


-EX.  38.] 


1825. 


55 


greater  portion  of  ease  and  joy  has  entered  my  mind  since 
his  birth  than  I  have  known  for  years ;  not  that  tender 
recollections  or  tears  are  forgotten,  I  was  confined  in  the 
evening  of  the  First-day  after  his  dear  brother's  interment. 
Two  nights  of  more  refreshing  rest  than  I  have  had  for  a 
long  time  were  a  merciful  preparation  for  such  a  trial. 

Alluding  to  the  purchase  of  Polam,  which  was  after- 
wards their  residence,  she  remarks  : — 

I  have  felt  a  satisfaction  in  it  that  is  as  a  token  for  good 
which  has  never  yet  deceived  me^  and  is  cause  for  much 
thankfulness,  and  also  watchfulness  that  we  rest  not  in  these 
things.  Oh !  what  pains  and  trouble  I  might  have  spared 
myself  had  I  acted  up  to  my  first  clear  impression  on  the 
subject.  Child  in  religious  experience  and  in  knowledge  of 
life !  if  ever  thou  readest  this,  let  me  counsel  thee,  without 
being  enthusiastic,  not  to  throw  away  clear  impressions  even 
with  regard  to  the  affairs  of  this  world — affairs  in  which  the 
worldly-wise,  and  perhaps  even  some  of  the  good,  may  say 
faith  has  nothing  to  do.  But  I  believe  it  often  has  to  do  with 
little  things ;  for  as  the  foolishness  of  God  is  wiser  than  the 
wisdom  of  men,  so  He  who  can  see  present  and  future  at  one 
glance  may  well  see  on  what  apparently  trifling  or  indifferent 
things  hangs  much  that  is  of  great  importance  to  his  weak 
creature  man.  "  In  all  thy  ways  acknowledge  Him,  and  He 
shall  direct  thy  paths." 

of  4th  mo. — On  First  and  Second-day,  my  mind 
enjoyed  a  liberty,  and  something  of  the  light  of  the  glorious 
gospel  which  I  often  pant  after.  In  each  day  a  religious 
engagement  seemed  peculiarly  blessed  to  myself.  The  powers 
of  the  world  to  come, — what  an  infant  I  am  in  the  knowledge 
of  them !  My  dear  babe  a  treat  and  blessing,  for  which  I 
am,  I  trust,  truly  thankful. 

To  . 

Darlington,  27th  of  4th  mo.,  1825. 

In  reply  to  thy  question  as  to  the  Friendliness  of 
my  children,  I  do  not  know  much  about  it.  I  certainly  wish 
them  to  be  Friends,  inasmuch  as  if  they  keep  to  the  truth  in 
all  things,  little  and  great,  I  believe  it  will  make  them  so. 


5G 


1825. 


[.ET.  38. 


This  is  the  only  standard  I  ever  wish  in  my  house.  "Friendly 
or  "  ixn-Friendly,"  as  applied  to  extei'nal  objects,  I  have 
always  disliked,  as  a  vague  term,  which  can  have  no  other 
import  than  by  putting  effect  for  cause.  Gay  or  grave,  plain 
(or  simple)  and  complex,  I  can  understand,  and  that  it  is 
desirable  to  be  grave  rather  than  gay,  because  the  time  is 
short,  and  we  do  not  want  external  objects  to  attract  us  from 
internal ;  and,  for  the  same  good  reason,  tilings  had  better 
be  simple  than  complex,  and — with  allowance  for  improve- 
ment— uniform ;  for  they  must  require  Ic^s  attention  than 
when  they  change  for  the  sake  of  change.    =■=    *  * 

H.  C.  Backhouse. 

19^A  of  5tJL  mo. — Some  fearful  but  satisfactory  conversation 
with  an  elder  this  morning.  Oh  !  that  we  were  so  anchored  in 
the  truth  as  really  to  understand  each  other ;  then  would  the 
fear  of  man  be  done  away,  love  and  hai'mony  would  prevail 
more  eminently  than  they  do, — each  might  rejoice  in  seeing 
his  neighbour  walk  in  the  way  cast  up  for  him ;  because  He 
who  orders  all  things  rightly  makes  room  for  the  talents  of  all, 
allows  no  confusion,  but  wills  that  each  should  help  the  other. 

Leyton,  lOih  of  6th  mo. — On  Second-day  the  30th,  I  set 
off  with  all  my  family  to  join  my  husband  in  London.  An 
interesting  First-day  before  leaving  home. 

7th  mo.,  Fourth-day. — At  Gracechurch  Street  Monthly 
Meeting,  with  John  Barclay.  I  was  too  prompt,  felt  my 
poverty,  and  was  humbled  under  a  sense  of  it ;  John  Barclay 
striking,  and  the  meeting  solid.  In  that  for  discipline  I 
was  more  satisfied  that  in  wishing  to  be  obedient  I  had 
not  been  officious. 

Leyton,  Sixth-day. — I  came  here  with  the  wish  to  be 
with  my  sister,  and  so  far  I  am  thankful  that  I  have  felt 
remarkably  free  to  enjoy  the  beauties  of  nature,  and  the 
domestic  pleasures  of  this  house. 

Eai'lham,  15th  of  7th  mo. — The  enemy  has  been  busy, 
and  disquieted  many  hours  of  the  night  and  of  the  day, 
which  should  have  been  under  the  government  of  the 
Prince  of  Peace.  However  it  is  no  sin  to  be  tempted,  nor  to 
feel  the  power  of  the  tempter,  which  has  been  limited,  and  I 
have  had  peace  and  comfort  in  being  with  my  friends,  and 
not  questioning  I  was  right  in  it.     Altogether  I  have  been 


A:r.  39. 


18.2G. 


57 


in  u  low  key,  but  iu  it  perhaps  a  little  more  patience  than  usual. 
The  meetings  interesting  to  me  ;  tliere  seems  a  revival  among 
Friends.  If  this  people  all  pulled  one  way,  what  power  there 
would  be  in  them  !  Amelia  Opie's  joining  the  Soeiety  a 
subject  of  interest. 

Cromer,  7th  of  Sth  mo. — My  mind  has  often  been  greatly 
tossed  and  tempted  since  I  came  here;  too  susceptible 
of  the  influence  of  external  circumstances ;  too  eager  about 
the  affairs  of  this  world ;  but  here  and  there  a  gleam  of 
comfort  and  better  health  than  I  have  enjoyed  for  years.  I 
wish  to  do  right,  but  am  not  patient  and  decided  enough,  and 
not  diligent  enough  in  reading  the  Scriptures. 

Larlinyton,  5ih  of  lOth  mo. — We  came  home  the  beginning 
of  the  last  month.  I  was  glad  to  return  with  a  confirmed 
belief  that  if  it  be  not  positively  my  place  to  be  from 
home,  it  is  positively  my  place  to  be  there :  I  have  felt 
less  buffeted  and  tempted,  my  mind  more  at  ease.  Isaac 
Pease's  illness  and  death  have  been  a  subject  of  much 
interest  to  us  ;  also  Ann  Jones's  services  at  the  funeral,  and 
at  the  Quarterly  Meeting  at  Newcastle.  Her  warnings 
mixed  with  her  encouragements  came  closely  home  to  some 
of  us.  We  had  a  nice  and  instructive  visit  from  John 
Dymond,  whose  meek  and  quiet  spirit  reminded  us  iu  what 
true  riches  consist. 

At  the  Quarterly  Meeting,  I  went  into  the  men's  meeting 
to  testify  against  sporting.  My  dear  cousin  Margaret 
Richardson  accompanied  me. 

Twelfth  Month. — General  banking  run,  and  money  affairs 
sadly  besetting.  The  Monthly  Meeting  at  Stockton  in  the 
midst  of  it  truly  refreshing.  My  own  mind  hard,  to  religious 
feeling  obtuse ;  love  of  the  things  of  this  world  pressing,  the 
fear  of  wrong  also  besetting,  and  di'awing  the  mind  from 
watchfulness  in  the  present  moment  which  is  only  ours. 

SOihof  1st  mo.,  1826. — This  mouth  something  of  a  repeti- 
tion of  the  last;  business  occupj'ing  my  dear  husband  so  much 
as  to  be  a  trial  to  me  ;  myself  also  unwell  with  some  symptoms 
which  may  make  the  joys  and  sorrows  of  this  world  very  tran- 
sient ;  but  it  may  be  one  of  my  fancies,  and  I  may  yet  live  to 
know  the  bands  of  brass  and  iron  with  which  I  so  generally  feel 
bound  to  be  broken.  Children  vei'y  sweet,— a  great  treat  to  me. 


58 


1826. 


[.ET.  3y. 


CHAPTER  V. 

TRAVELS     AS    A    MINISTER  IN     COMrANY    WITH     ISAAC  STEPHENSON 

VISITS  F^UVIILIES  IN  HER  OWN  MONTHLY  MEETING,  ETC.  WITH  HER 

HUSBAND  VISITS   ESSEX,  SUFFOLK,    AND  NORFOLK  JOURNEY  INTO 

DEVON    AND     CORNWALL  VISIT     TO     FAMILIES    IN  NEWCASTLE 

MONTHLY  MEETING,  AND  TO  FRIENDS  IN  LINCOLNSHIRE,  CAM- 
BRIDGESHIRE AND  HUNTINGDONSHIRE  IRELAND. 

2n(i  of  3rd  mo. — Entered  last  week  on  a  visit  with  Isaac 
Stephenson  to  the  families  of  this  Monthly  Meeting.  Ability 
for  this  service  is  surely  a  gift ;  may  the  vessel  be  purified 
by  using  it  in  faith  ! 

29th  of  3rd  mo. — This  month  has  been  spent  mostly 
with  Isaac  Stephenson,  first  in  visiting  the  famihes,  and  then, 
after  many  cogitations  and  some  provings  of  faith,  I  went 
forward  from  Cotherstone  with  him,  taking  Abigail  Wilson 
with  me  to  Kendal.  We  visited  Lancaster,  Manchester, 
and  Leeds,  and  returned  home  to  our  Monthly  Meeting 
on  Second-day  the  20th.  It  cost  me  some  heart-sinkings 
and  tears  ;  but  my  mind  was  underneath  sweetly  pre- 
served in  peace  and  confidence,  and  though  I  had  times  of 
depression  and  fear  to  pass  through,  I  have  been  thankful 
that  I  have  made  the  sacrifice.  It  has  endeared  many  indi- 
viduals to  me ;  and  at  times  the  undoubted  belief  that  it  was 
a  Divine  requiring  has  strengthened  my  faith,  and  excited 
some  degree  of  thankfulness  for  being  so  employed.  Went  to 
Stockton  on  Fifth-day;  ray  husband  gained  the  willing  consent 
of  Priends  to  proceed  in  the  visit  to  the  families  there,  but 
after  attending  Norton  Meeting  the  next  day  we  returned 
home,  Isaac  Stephenson  not  being  well.  I  was  rejoiced  at  the 
present  release,  enjoyed  some  sweet  peace,  but  again  brought 
a  deep  cloud  over  my  mind  by  unguarded  conversation. 

Fourth  Month. — Our  family  visit  completed,  to  some  increase 
of  faith.  Returned  on  First-day  the  16th.  Second-day  was 
a  sweet  day  of  rest  and  peace. 


MT.  39.] 


1826. 


59 


Fifth  Month. — Monthly  Meeting.  My  mind  seemed  in 
measure  prepared  to  mention  my  concern  of  visiting,  after 
the  Yearly  Meeting,  the  counties  of  Essex,  Suffolk,  and 
Norfolk ;  but  I  became  sadly  beclouded  by  asking  counsel  of 
man,  when  I  had  no  business  to  do  so,  from  cowardice  or 
secretly  wishing  to  obtain  ease  under  a  burden  which  I 
should  have  been  contented  to  bear  till  the  right  time,  and 
then  no  doubt  sufficient  strength  and  clearness  would  have 
been  given.  So  the  Monthly  Meeting  passed,  and  the  load 
yet  remained,  wearing  me  not  a  little  ;  though  I  endeavoured 
to  strive  against  it,  and  comforted  myself  in  hoping  a  way  of 
escape  was  yet  open. 

In  the  Yearly  Meeting,  the  little  active  service  I  had 
I  believe  Friends  united  with,  and  I  may  almost  say  I  was 
thankful  that  little  did  devolve  upon  me ;  for  I  thought  I  saw, 
more  clearly  than  I  had  ever  done  before,  that  it  does  truly 
require  great  weight  and  power,  such  as  are  not  often  given 
except  to  those  of  much  experience,  to  move  acceptably  in 
these  large  meetings ;  and  that  many  that  were  often  wise  in 
other  places  might  there  be  in  especial  danger  of  offering  the 
sacrifice  of  fools,  particularly  in  prayer — the  sense  of  it  over 
the  meeting  being  caught  by  those  not  fitted  to  convey  the 
expression  of  it  to  so  large  an  assembly,  and  so  taking  the 
place  of  those  who  might  have  conveyed  it  more  rightly. 
Yet  the  weakest  should  not  be  discouraged  because  they 
sometimes  miss  the  way,  nor  the  simplest  in  following  the 
obedience  of  faith  because  it  does  not  always  tell  for  much 
among  their  fellow-mortals.  No  doubt  the  Master  of  assem- 
blies often  ruled  over  all,  and  kept  things  in  right  order, 
which  was  generally  very  conspicuous.  The  last  sitting  of  the 
Select  Meeting  a  memorable  and  instructive  occasion.  After 
much  conflict  in  my  own  mind  (but  with  the  advice  of  many 
friends  whom  I  consulted)  my  husband  and  myself  joined 
Isaac  Stephenson  and  his  wife,  and  attended  the  Quarterly 
Meetings  of  Essex,  Suffolk  and  Norfolk,  and  many  of  the 
meetings  in  these  counties.*     I  felt  satisfied  in  being  in 

*  H.  C.  Backhouse  applied  for  by  letter,  and  obtained,  the  sanction 
of  her  Monthly  Meeting,  which  (it  will  be  remembered)  she  had  been 
<liscouraged  from  aaking  for  previously  to  leaving  home. 

,» 


00 


1826. 


[/ET.  39. 


my  place,  tliougli  often  sunk  very  low.  It  is  a  wonderful 
service, — we  had  need  undergo  deep  baptism  to  be  prepared 
for  it ;  little  as  my  part  was,  I  thought  sometimes  I  had 
nearly  as  much  as  I  could  bear.  We  returned  home  with 
peaceful  minds.  After  what  1  have  seen  and  known,  though 
it  can  be  but  a  very  small  part,  can  I  doubt  the  power  and 
guidance  of  the  Holy  Spirit,  or,  with  it,  the  realities  of 
invisible  things  ? 

We  met  with  much  kindness  from  Friends,  particularly 
from  Anne  Dale  and  llachel  Womersley,  who  went  with  us  to 
many  places.  This  little  journey  has  introduced  my  mind 
into  a  new  and  interesting  field. 

Under  the  appreliension  that  further  service  would 
be  requu'ed  of  her,  she  writes  : — 

I  have  had  many  plunges,  as  well  as  some  centred 
moments,  in  Avhich  my  mind  could  renew  its  faith,  and  hope, 
that  the  thick  clouds  and  darkness  which  have  been  round 
about  were  not  as  a  punishment  for  sin,  and  would  in  the 
end  be  dispersed.  I  now  feel  as  if  both  spiritual  and  natural 
health  materially  depended  on  hourly  watchfulness,  especially 
keeping  my  mind  from  earnestness  about  outward  things, 
which,  I  perceive,  has  been  a  great  snare  to  me.  When  , 
anything  not  necessary  awakens  much  care,  it  is  better  to 
turn  from  it  and  leave  it,  in  faith  and  hope  that  if  we  keep 
our  minds  open  to  the  discoveries  of  truth  we  shall  not  be 
left  to  blunder  on  in  darkness.  I  could  wish  I  had  more 
attended  to  this  excellent  injunction  of  the  Apostle — ''Let 
your  conversation  be  without  covetousness,  and  be  content 
with  such  things  as  ye  have  ;  for  He  hath  said,  I  will  never 
leave  thee  nor  forsake  thee." 

Seaton,  6th  of  9th  mo. — "  Ye  have  not  yet  resisted  unto 
blood  striving  against  sin,"  I  thought  applied  to  myself. 
When  shall  I  be  content  not  to  be  pleased  ?  When  shall  I 
be  sufficiently  weaned  from  the  love  of  this  world  and  its 
delights  (that  might  be  otherwise  innocent  and  even  desii'able), 
to  make  my  duty  to  God  and  man  my  only  business  ?  "  To 
the  pure  Thou  wilt  shew  thyself  pure.'"'     May  thy  purity 


.F.T.  39.] 


1820. 


01 


be  my  aim  and  ddiglit !  Enable  nic  to  bear  tbc  furnace  that 
is  to  separate  from  all  that  breathes  not  "  Thy  will  be  done 
and  oh  !  my  God,  suffer  me  not  to  be  tempted  above  what  I 
am  able  to  bear,  but  manifest  the  power  of  thy  love  in 
carrying  me  victorious  through  it  !  Yet  I  am  more  and  more 
persuaded  that  this  kind  goeth  not  out  but  by  fasting  and 
px'ayer,  in  which  I  believe  I  am  deficient,  and  therefore  may 
well  be  overcome  as  often  as  I  am,  and  my  natural  strength 
seems  to  fail  under  the  conflict. 

Twelfth  Month. — At  the  Monthly  Meeting  I  ventured  to 
propose  joining  Isaac  Stephenson  in  holding  some  public 
meetings  in  the  towns  and  villages  in  parts  of  Durham  and 
Yorkshire.  About  two  months  afterwards  we  returned  the 
certificate,  and  truly  I  have  had  cause  to  be  made  thankful 
that  I  was  strengthened  to  give  up  to  the  service.  Though 
very  conscious  of  much  imperfection  in  my  part  of  the  en- 
gagement, most  of  the  meetings  were  satisfactory,  many 
eminently  so.  Returned  home  with  more  of  the  flow  of  peace 
than  is  often  my  lot  to  experience.  In  this  time  we  have  had 
much  company  and  many  social  engagements.  My  brother 
William's  j'oungest  child  James,  a  sweet  boy,  between  four 
and  five  years  of  age,  died  after  a  short  illness.  I  was  with 
them  when  he  expired, — it  was  a  deeply-affecting  occasion, 
and  I  was  comforted  in  having  some  capacity  to  weep  with 
those  who  weep.  The  funeral  was  a  uniting  time,  and  soon 
again  we  were  re-assembled  in  the  chamber  of  death  ; — my 
father  Backhouse  died  as  in  a  moment,  whilst  sitting  in  his 
arm-chair,  on  the  11th  of  the  Eleventh  Month.  He  appeared 
but  a  few  minutes  before  as  well  as  usual,  and  was  found  a 
lifeless  corpse.  I  happened  to  enter  the  house  almost  at  that 
instant, — not  a  muscle  seemed  to  have  moved ;  he  most  likely 
departed  in  sleep,  as  little  expecting  the  change  at  the  time 
as  did  his  family.  I  never  saw  death  in  so  mild  a  form. 
We  have  good  reason  to  believe  he  was  ready  to  go,  and  that 
his  change  is  a  happy  one.  The  funeral,  and  many  other  times 
before  it  took  place,  were  sweetly  uniting  to  his  large  and 
collected  family  of  children  and  grandchildren.  May  the 
bond  of  the  fellowship  of  the  gospel  increase  in  strength 
among  us,  as  I  believe  it  has  already  been  often  known  to 
exist ! 


G2 


1827. 


[/KT.  40. 


In  the  prospect  of  a  religions  visit  to  Devonshire  and 
Cornwall,  H.  C.  Backhouse  writes  : — 

At  our  Monthly  Meeting  at  Stockton  on  the  13th  of  Second 
]\Iouth,  a  prospect  that  had  been  long  before  me  so  pressed 
upon  my  mind  soon  after  taking  my  seat  in  meeting,  that  I 
thought  it  best  to  mention  it  to  Friends  at  that  time,  and  I 
have  since  had  reason  to  be  truly  thankful  that  I  was  enabled 
to  do  so.  The  manner  in  which  it  was  received  has  been  a 
stay  to  my  mind,  and  I  have  since  enjoyed  more  cheerful- 
ness and  serenity  than  for  a  long  time  past,  and  I  have 
had  leisure  quietly  to  make  arrangements  for  the  journey. 
Deep  clouds  have  compassed  me,  and  fears  of  not  doing 
right  in  outward  things — I  do  not  mean  morally  right, 
but  religiously  right — but  I  believe  these  may  be  beset- 
ments  of  the  enemy  to  perplex  me ;  they  however  drive  to 
prayer.  I  have  been  entangled  occasionally  perhaps  by  both 
want  of  faithfulness  and  by  folly ;  some  covetousness  also,  not 
of  money  I  am  sure,  but  of  indulgences  :  but  who  has  passed 
through  life  and  done  right  and  wisely  in  all  things  ?  How- 
ever, I  believe  it  is  now  honestly  all  my  desire  and  all  my 
request  that  I  may  have  the  direction  of  pure  Wisdom  in 
everything. 

Feeling  the  requiring  clear  to  go  into  Cornwall  has  com- 
forted me, — a  favour  I  am  not  worthy  of.  Leaving  children 
and  home  will  many  times  cost  nature  much,  yet  I  feel  a 
trust  they  will  not  suffer  from  it,  though  I  may  never  see 
them  again.  The  interest  which  both  servants  and  children, 
as  well  as  friends,  seem  to  feel,  is  very  sweet.  "  Thy  ways 
are  higher  than  our  ways,  and  thy  thoughts  than  our 
thoughts."  Make  them  ours  (in  our  sphere),  through  thy 
Holy  Spirit.         *    *  * 

Who  is  sufficient  for  these  things  ?  Left  to  ourselves,  they 
are  impossible.  We  can  only  go  forward  under  a  humble 
trust  that  strength  will  be  given  sufficient  for  the  part  we 
may  be  called  upon  to  perform.  If  our  humility  is  but 
increased  thereby,  the  end  may  be  answered.  May  we  bow 
low  enough  to  be  shielded  from  danger,  though  we  cannot 
escape  trial.    *    *  ^-  * 


MT.  10.] 


1827. 


03 


J.  and  II.  C.  Backhouse  left  homo  on  this  journey 
through  Devon  and  Cornwall,  in  the  Third  month,  1827. 
They  visited  the  meetings  of  Friends  generally  in  both 
counties,  and  in  some  places  the  families.  They  were 
accompanied  in  part  of  the  visit  by  their  cousins  Robert 
and  Maria  Fox,  of  Falmouth.  It  was  at  this  place  that 
H.  C.  Backhouse  held  the  first  public  meeting  appointed 
at  her  solo  request  for  the  inhabitants  generally.  This 
was  followed  by  other  meetings  of  the  same  description, 
principally  in  their  visit  to  the  Scilly  Isles  ;  in  reference 
to  which  she  says  : — 

These  meetings  were  mostly  very  satisfactory ;  the  poor 
people  were  quiet  and  attentive,  and  I  trust  an  influence  at 
times  prevailed  that  contrited  many  hearts. 

To  a  pubHc  meeting  at  Devonport,  in  the  Town-hall, 
she  alludes  as  follows  : — 

This  was  a  memorable  occasion  to  me,  in  which  I  was 
remarkably  sensible  of  grace  to  help  in  time  of  need ;  for, 
from  the  place  and  the  multitudes  that  attended  it,  it  was  an 
awful  undertaking. 

Early  in  her  public  ministerial  course  as  was  this 
meeting,  it  is  not  uninteresting  to  know  that  it  was  a 
labour  which  bore  fruit.  A  respectable  young  woman 
was  much  impressed  on  the  occasion,  and  subsequently 
joined  the  Society. 

We  afterwards  held  public  meetings  at  Barnstaple,  Bideford, 
Ilfracombc,  Torrington,  and  three  other  places ;  all,  except 
one,  to  me  very  satisfactory.  John  and  Olive  Dymond  were 
with  us,  and  most  kind  and  agreeable  companions.  Here 
ended  our  engagement ;  it  appeared  time  to  leave  off,  though 
the  field  for  labour  seemed  so  open  that  it  was  difficult  to 
quit  it.  We  returned  home  by  Sheffield  and  Doncaster  ;  the 
Monthly  Meeting  at  the  latter  place  was  a  time  of  much 
refreshment  to  me.    Left  that  evening  late,  and  arrived  at 


G4 


1837. 


[.KT.  40. 


home  the  next  day,  truly  thankful  and  delighted  to  meet  my 
dear  family  all  well.  It  was  like  having  them  all  given  to  me 
again.  My  mind,  though  low,  continued  calm  and  peaceful, 
and  especially  I  felt  it  a  day  of  favour  when  we  gave  in  an 
account  of  the  journey  at  the  Monthly  Meeting;  but  in 
returning,  I  have  been  made  remarkably  sensible  that  the 
business  of  religion  is  the  business  of  every  day,  and  that  the 
exercises  and  strength  of  any  past  day  are  but  as  nothing  for 
the  one  that  is  passing  over  us.  The  dread  of  getting  into  a 
worldly  scale,  and  manner  of  life  inconsistent  with  our  pro- 
fession, has  made  me  ready  to  fear  lest  we  should  bring  a 
reproach  on  our  words  and  profession ;  but  perhaps  these 
are  baptisms  which  the  poor  of  the  world  escape,  and  they 
may  be  given  in  counterpoise  to  those  who  are  blessed  with 
the  abundance  of  temporal  possessions,  and  whose  sufferings 
in  making  a  choice  may  only  be  known  to  Him  who  tries  the 
hearts. 

Towards  the  end  of  this  year  J.  and  H.  C.  Backhouse 
began  a  visit  to  the  families  in  Newcastle  Monthly 
Meeting.  This  and  other  religious  engagenients  iu  that 
quarter  occupied  them  for  some  months. 

The  following  remarks  are  in  allusion  to  this  prospect, 
and  also  to  their  quitting  South-End  as  a  residence  : — 

It  was  a  heart-rending  time  to  me  to  separate  from  my 
family,  and  under  the  sense  of  how  uncertain  whether  we 
ever  meet  together  again,  certainly  not  in  a  house  to  which 
we  have  become  attached,  and  in  which  I  have  spent  some  of 
the  happiest  as  well  as  the  most  bitter  moments  of  my  life, 
both  from  natural  and  spiritual  causes.  My  tears  flowed  in 
unusual  abundance,  and  my  heart  was  indeed  full,  especially 
towards  my  dear  children.  I  was  almost  afraid  of  neglect- 
ing my  spiritual  concerns  from  the  overwhelming  feelings  of 
thus  breaking  up  our  sweet,  happy  little  family. 

It  was  fixed  for  our  girls  to  spend  the  winter  with  my  dear 
father  and  mother — we  left  dear  Henry  settled  at  school,  and 
Edmund  with  his  kind  uncle  and  aunt  John  Backhouse — so 


.KV.  41.] 


1828. 


G5 


that  my  mind  was  set  at  rest,  about  my  dear  cliildreu^  and 
we  entered  upon  our  arduous  work  with  the  very  acceptable 
company  of  our  cousin,  Margaret  Richardson.  We  laboured 
very  harmoniously  together  through  the  meetings  of  Shields 
and  Newcastle,  and  some  public  meetings.  The  measure  of 
suffering  in  this  part  of  the  engagement  has  not  been  small ; 
help  enough  to  support  us,  I  think  I  may  say,  never  failed 
my  often  doubting  mind.  My  husband  and  I  went  through 
the  families  at  Sunderland  alone,  which  I  believe  was  also 
right ;  though  I  felt  as  if  a  greater  weight  was  laid  upon  us, 
and  perhaps  a  deeper  exercise,  after  our  very  instructive  com- 
panion left  us,  she  not  seeing  her  w-ay  to  go  through  this 
meeting.  We  attended  the  Monthly  Meeting  at  New- 
castle, and  after  it,  I  was  taken  so  ill  that  I  could  not  move 
from  the  house  of  our  valued  friend  George  Richardson,  but 
was  confined  there,  mostly  to  my  bed,  for  a  week.  Whether 
I  should  survive,  seemed  to  myself  uncertain ;  but  I  had  no 
wish  to  die,  and  though  nervous  suffering  and  prostration 
of  strength  were  great,  yet  underneath  I  was  supported,  and 
was  cared  for  by  George  Richardson's  family,  with  true 
kindness  and  attention.  At  length  in  a  very  weak  state  I 
reached  Sunderland.  By  slow  degrees  we  got  through  the 
remainder  of  our  visit  here. 

I8th  of  3rd  mo.,  1828. — Since  writing  the  above  we  have 
finished  our  engagement,  by  visiting  the  families  at  Durham. 
We  have  had  a  very  interesting  Monthly  Meeting ;  the 
ministry  in  it  was  alielp  to  me.  We  gave  up  our  minute,  and 
afterwards  I  laid  before  Friends  a  prospect  of  visiting  Lin- 
colnshire, Cambridgeshire,  and  Huntingdonshire,  and  the 
families  at  Ipswich.  I  never  more  felt  the  sympathy  of  the 
spirits  of  my  friends,  many  seeming  much  tendered.  My 
dear  husband  also  expressed  his  wish  to  go  with  me,  and  we 
were  comfortably  set  at  liberty ;  and  this  evening  my  soul 
rests  as  beside  the  still  waters. 

I  feel  my  faith  renewed  at  this  moment  in  our  Heavenly 
Father's  care  over  us,  hoping  that  we  may  yet  leave  all  our 
besetments  behind  us,  and  press  forward  to  a  higher  mark 
tlian  the  comforts  of  this  present  world,  which  have  so 

F 


66 


18.28. 


[mt.  41. 


engrossed  us  of  late.*  However^  I  may  acknowledge  I  have 
had  satisfaction  in  attending  to  some  necessary  household 
concerns.  True  faith  will  not  lead  to  the  neglect  of  these 
things  ;  for  "  if  a  man  rule  not  his  own  house,  how  can  he 
take  care  of  the  Church  of  God  ?"  and  inspection  into  every 
department  is  necessary  to  ruling  well. 

Having  given  a  brief  outline  of  the  accomplishment 
of  the  visit  above  mentioned,  the  journal  continues  : — 

On  the  19th  of  Fifth  Month,  we  attended,  with  my  father, 
the  funeral  of  my  aunt  Chapman,  at  Winchmore  HiU.  Best 
help  I  do  helieve  was  near,  and  the  many  relations  as  well 
as  friends  who  were  present  felt  it  a  favoured  season. 

Fourth-day. — Began  the  Yearly  ]\Ieeting.  I  sat  under  a 
sense  of  great  fear  lest  I  should  not  be  able  to  see  clearly,  or 
be  faithful  during  this  Yearly  Meeting  ;  which  perhaps,  being 
the  feeling  of  many  minds  present,  I  might  have  been  made 
mouth  for  them  in  supplicating  that  the  language  "  Fear 
not,"  might  be  heard  in  the  hearts  of  the  lambs  and  of  the 
sheep  of  the  Lord's  fold ;  my  own  mind  was  reheved,  and  I 
trust  others  not  burdened.  Next  day  came  a  greater  trial  of 
my  faith ;  as  soon  almost  as  I  sat  down,  the  men's  meeting 
came  into  my  mind,  and  another  Friend  expressing  a  similar 
concern,  I  offered  to  join  her.  It  was  a  fearful  undertaking  ; 
but  I  was  enabled  to  come  out  of  the  meeting  feehng  pretty 
clear.  Once  or  twice  during  the  Yearly  INIeeting  I  might 
have  earned  more  wages  by  more  action,  but  altogether  the 
end  was  peace  to  me. 

Attended  to  satisfaction  two  public  meetings  held  by  Ann 
Alexander — peaceful  in  being  another's  helper. 

]\Iy  mind  has  been  of  late  less  covered  with  clouds  than  it 
used  to  be,  and  my  health  revives  with  it.  "  "What  shall  I 
render  for  all  Thy  benefits  ?"  may  well  be  the  language  of 
my  soul. 

My  dear  father  and  mother  left  us  on  the  17th  of  Twelfth 
Month,  after  a  very  sweet  parting  opportunity.    Many  things 


*  Eeferring  to  the  occupations  iuvolved  in  their  change  of  residence. 


.«T.  42.J 


1829. 


G7 


of  deep  interest  have  occurred  in  their  visit :  towards  the 
end  of  it  the  prospect  of  visiting  Ireland  came  very  closely 
before  me.  It  was  so  weighty  that  I  thought  I  must  have 
mentioned  it  at  the  Monthly  Meeting  in  the  Eleventh  Month  ; 
but  many  considerations  held  me  back. 

At  the  next  Monthly  Meeting,  Elizabeth  Dudley  [who 
was  at  this  time  paying  a  religious  visit  at  Darlington] ,  was 
led  in  a  remarkable  strain  of  encouragement  to  some  mind 
or  minds  present  to  go  and  preach  the  gospel,  setting  forth 
how  it  was  ordained  that  the  gospel  should  be  promulgated 
by  instruments  from  the  earliest  days  to  the  present,  and 
bringing  forward  the  example  of  Gideon's  trying  the  fleece, 
as  a  condescension  to  his  weakness,  not  as  a  subject  of  imita- 
tion ;  as,  had  he  gone  in  the  strength  first  afforded,  it  might 
have  been  as  great,  and  the  sacrifice  as  acceptable.  Tlie 
sanction  of  the  meeting  to  the  concern,  and  to  that  of  my 
husband  to  accompany  me,  was  comforting. 

In  allusion  to  this  prospect,  H.  C.  Backhouse  writes : — 

Since  the  Monthly  Meeting  in  which  our 
prospects  met  with  the  unity  of  our  friends,  my  mind  has  at 
times  enjoyed  such  profound  peace,  that  I  can  make  no  doubt 
thus  far  we  are  right  in  the  matter.  The  beginning  is  a  small 
part :  may  we  be  preserved  to  the  end  in  faith  and  patience  ! 

The  following  letters  relate  to  this  journey  : — 

To  Joseph  Gurney. 

Lisburn,  Third-day,  7th  of  3rd  mo.,  1 829. 

My  Dear  Father, 

*  *  *  Though  often  very  weary,  we  are 
well,  and  have  had  a  very  comforting  meeting  to-day — a  crown 
to  our  engagements  in  this  quarter,  with  which  our  friends 
seem  well  satisfied.  We  have  great  cause  to  be  truly  grate- 
ful ;  not  exalted,  I  trust,  but  refreshed  and  strengthened  to 
persevere. 

We  are  to  have  a  meeting  with  all  the  outcasts  at  Richhill, 
on  Sixth-day ;  they  are  a  very  numerous  and  very  neglected 

F  3 


68 


1829. 


[/KT.  42. 


class  in  those  parts.  In  that  Meeting  I  am  told  there  are 
sixty  families,  with  more  or  less  connection  with  onr  Society, 
and  yet  not  members,  and  in  a  very  low,  neglected  and 
ignorant  state.    *    *  * 

Jonathan  Backhouse. 

Jonathan  Backhouse's  benevolent  feehngs  were 
strongly  awakened  on  behalf  of  the  class  here  alluded 
to,  who  were  mostly  the  descendants  of  those  who  had 
left  the  Society  on  doctrinal  or  other  grounds,  towards  the 
beginning  of  this  century,  but  many  of  whom  continued 
to  attend  the  meetings  of  Friends ;  and,  with  the  energy 
and  zeal  which  belonged  to  his  character,  he  did  not 
rest  satisfied  until  he  had  enlisted  the  support  of  Friends 
in  aid  of  a  scheme  for  the  establishment  of  a  school  at 
Brookfield,  for  the  children  of  these  poor  neglected 
people.  The  institution  has  been  and  still  continues 
eminently  useful  and  prosperous. 

Moyallan,  17th  of  3rd  mp.,  1829. 

My  Dearest  Mother, 

On  First-day,  though  very  weak,  I  attended 
both  the  meetings  at  this  place,  but  they  were  very  remai'k- 
able  ones,  perhaps  worth  all  the  suffering  they  have  occasioned 
me.  I  rose  with  only  the  text  in  my  mind,  "  He  that 
believeth  and  is  baptised  shall  be  saved,  but  he  that  believeth 
not  shall  be  damned.''  I  had  to  enlarge  upon  it  in  a  way 
that  I  had  never  thought  of  before,  greatly  to  the  relief  of 
my  own  mind.  Several  unbelievers  were  present.  In  the 
afternoon  I  had  only  a  few  words  to  say  towards  the  end  of 
the  meeting ;  but  I  understood  afterwards  that  one  of  these 
people  not  in  the  habit  of  coming  to  meeting  was  there,  and 
she  appeared  a  good  deal  affected.  I  mention  not  these 
things  boastingly,  but  that  they  may  help  to  reconcile  you,  as 
they  have  done  myself,  to  this  trying  detention.  Our  friends 
the  Wakefields  are  most  truly  kind  to  us. 

H.  C.  Backhouse. 


.-KT.  42.] 


1829. 


G9 


Dublin,  12th  of  6th  mo.,  1829. 

On  Fourth-day  \vc  hope  to  take  tlie  steam - 
packet  for  Liverpool ;  but  my  impatience  to  be  in  it  has  met 
with  so  many  rebukes  that  I  desire  not  to  look  at  it,  but 
trust  that  the  hour  of  clearly  leaving  this  interesting  land  will 
arrive.  After  all  the  kindness  we  have  received,  and  the 
interest  we  have  felt  for  many  individuals,  the  idea  of  a  last 
farewell  will  suppress  the  feeling  of  gladness  at  the  end  of  our 
labours  :  if  we  are  low  and  peaceful  it  is  all  I  look  for  or 
desire.  I  am  remarkably  well  in  health.  I  do  not  think  for 
many  years  I  have  felt  so  much  power  in  rallying  from 
fatigue,  or  my  mind,  at  times,  in  so  happy  a  state. 

H.  C.  Backhouse. 

The  journal  contains  a  retrospect  of  their  journey, 
from  which  J.  and  H.  C.  Backhouse  returned  in  the 
Sixth  Month,  1829  :— 

In  the  course  of  four  or  five  months,  we  attended  all  the 
particular  meetings,  and  the  three  Quarterly  Meetings;  visited 
regularly  the  families  of  Friends  at  Cork,  and  made  many 
calls  at  most  places  whei'e  we  were;  attended  the  Yearly 
Meeting,  and  held  twenty  or  more  meetings  with  those  not 
in  profession  with  us.  There  was  much  exercise  of  faith,  but 
patience  had  not  its  perfect  work.  Perhaps  we  might,  to 
more  satisfaction,  have  visited  the  families  in  Dublin  also ;  but 
I  was  afraid  of  proceeding  without  sufficient  clearness.  May 
my  daily  prayer  be  for  patience,  and  the  close  exercise  of  my 
spirit  be  to  obtain  it  ! 

With  all  the  omissions  and  commissions  which  I  can  look 
back  on  with  shame,  I  can  remember  this  journey  among  the 
many  mercies  of  my  life ;  being  at  times  in  the  course  of  it 
introduced  into  a  more  soul-satisfying  state  than  I  had 
perhaps  ever  known  before ;  and  never  was  I  more  fully 
persuaded  that  we  were  commissioned  to  preach  the  gospel. 
The  company  of  my  dear  husband  was  truly  a  comfort  and 
support.  This  journey  has  enlarged  my  heart  in  love  to 
hundreds,  and  has  written  many  an  epistle  there,  which  I 
trust  may  never  be  blotted  out. 


70 


1829. 


[.KT.  42. 


The  kindness  of  many  dear  Friends  was  very  grateful^  and 
might  have  tended  to  make  us  think  of  ourselves  more  highly 
than  we  ought  to  think  ;  but  the  internal  weight  that  was 
laid  upon  our  spirits  was  such  a  counterbalance  that  the 
kindness  and  approbation  of  others  seemed  often  only  suffi- 
cient to  keep  us  from  sinking.  Invitations  were  so  many 
and  pressing  that  it  was  often  painful  to  refuse  them,  and 
at  times  oppressed  me,  lest  I  should  omit  what  ought  to  be 
done,  or  be  induced  by  the  solicitations  of  others,  to  go 
beyond  my  business.  Perhaps  I  shall  never  be  permitted  to 
see  my  way  with  the  clearness  that  some  otliers  have  done. 
It  has  many  times  appeared  to  me  more  like  a  commission  to 
go,  teach  all  nations,  and  that  we  must  be  instant  in  season 
and  out  of  season  ;  but  though  I  could  sometimes  imagine 
this  to  be  my  experience,  I  am  sure  I  cannot  always  preach, 
and  I  desire  firmly  to  hold  fast  the  principles  of  Friends  in 
this  particular. 


.EX.  42.] 


182'J. 


71 


CHAPTER  VI. 

rilONPEtiT  OF  A  RELIGIOUS  VISIT  TO  NORTH  AMERICA  PUBLIC  MEETINGS 

IN  DURHAM  AND  NORTHUMBERLAND  VOYAGE    TO    AMERICA  NEW 

YORK  HICKSISM  PHILADELPHIA  BALTIMORE  VISITS  FAMILIES 

IN  NEW  YORK  THOUGHTS  ON  THE  RESURRECTION  VISITS  MEET- 
INGS IN  PHILADELPHIA. 

We  hare  witnessed  the  commencement  and  the  pro- 
gress of  Hannah  C.  Backhouse's  labours  as  a  minister  of 
the  gospel,  and  have  seen  that,  even  in  the  comparatively 
early  days  of  her  service,  she  was  made  willing  to  leave 
the  comforts  and  enjoj^ments  of  her  home  and  family, 
and  to  endure  humiliation,  conflict,  and  toil,  for  the  love 
of  Jesus  and  the  good  of  souls. 

We  now  approach  the  period  in  which  a  yet  closer 
trial  of  her  faith  and  allegiance  to  the  Prince  of  Peace 
was  laid  upon  her,  yet  she  flinched  not.  The  call  to 
go  and  preach  the  kingdom  of  God  was  in  her  case,  as 
in  that  of  the  man  of  whom  we  read  in  the  gospel  of 
Luke,'""  accompanied  by  the  requirement  to  surrender 
the  claims  of  kindred  to  follow  Christ.  This  was 
nothing  less  than  an  absence,  for  some  years,  on  the 
Continent  of  North  America.  Before  proceeding  to 
trace  the  preparation  for  and  performance  of  her  ex- 
tensive labours  in  this  harvest-field,  we  have  to  notice 
some  minor  religious  engagements  which  occupied  her 
towards  the  close  of  1829,  which  seem  to  have  been 
required  both  as  a  clearing  out  from  her  own  land,  and 


*  Luke  ix.  60. 


72 


1829. 


[yET.  42. 


also  as  some  little  preparation  for  the  hardships  which 
she  was  to  encounter  in  the  wilderness. 

These  engagements  are  noticed  in  the  foUomng 
letters  : — 

To  Mary  James  Leckey. 

Darlington,  8th  of  11th  mo.,  1829. 

It  has  been  a  month  of  some  exercise  and  con- 
siderable peace.  At  our  ]Monthly  Meeting  last  Third-day, 
we  obtained  a  minute  for  holding  public  meetings  in  our 
neighbourhood,  if  a  range  of  forty  miles  may  be  so  called. 
I  have  found  every  fresh  concern  has  its  own  peculiar  fashion, 
so  that  one  trial  of  faith  does  not  lessen  the  next.  I  had 
great  peace  after  the  minute  was  granted  us,  so  that  I  did 
not  feel  inclined  to  doubt  and  fear. 

To  

lOth  of  12th  mo.,  1829. 

We  had  nearly  twenty  meetings,  to  more  or 
less  satisfaction,  mostly  held  in  Methodist  Meeting-houses ; 
we  have  also  attended  three  small  country  meetings  of 
Friends  at  Cornwood,  Allendale,  and  Alstone.  I  never,  for 
so  many  days  together,  had  such  poor  accommodation — 
lodging  in  small  public-houses,  the  air  coming  in  at  many  a 
crevice ;  so  thou  mayst  suppose  that  returning  to  our  own 
manner  of  living,  and  to  our  own  friends,  was  not  unwelcome, 
though  I  have  had  abundantly  to  experience  at  least  a  con- 
siderable degree  of  the  truth  of  these  lines  :  — 

"  If  place  we  seek,  or  place  we  shun, 
The  soul  finds  happiness  in  none  ; 
But  with  a  God  to  guide  our  way, 
'Tis  equal  joy  to  go  or  stay." 

I  can  enter  into  thy  feelings  in  most  things,  and  imagine 
what  you  pass  through  in  your  many  solitary  hours.  We 
have  all  our  burdens,  and  all  hours  of  trial  of  different  kinds. 
I  truly  feel  for  you  in  youi-  outward  solitude,  and  do  not 


^T.  43.] 


1830. 


73 


wonder  if  you  sometimes  think  yourselves  of  no  use ;  but  if 
under  such  fcehngs  we  abide  in  patience,  we  shall  find  that 
it  has  not  been  time  lost.  "  What  thy  hand  findeth  to  do, 
do  it  with  thy  might."  As  we  are  engaged  to  obey  this 
injunction,  it  is  surprising  how  our  way  opens  before  us, 
and  very  abundant  employment  will  be  found  for  us  all ;  but 
if  we  yield  to  fear  and  not  to  faith, — if,  instead  of  dispensing 
to  others  when  it  is  in  our  power  to  do  so,  we  withhold  more 
than  is  meet, — our  way,  instead  of  opening,  becomes  more  and 
more  shut  up,  and  every  faculty  of  the  mind  and  heart 
narrowed. 

To  Mary  James  Leckey. 

11th  of  1st  mo.,  1830. 
*  *  *  *  Clouds  that  now  beset  me  may 
clear  away,  but  baptism  after  baptism  seems  just  now  my 
portion.  I  know  something  of  the  blessedness  that  belongs 
to  faithfulness ;  but  under  the  idea  that  I  may  be  again  called 
to  sell  all,  and  part  with  many  at  least  of  my  choicest  blessings, 
body,  soul,  and  spirit  tremble. 

To  THE  SAME. 

6th  of  2iid  mo.,  1830. 

This  deep  baptism  that  I  am  and  have  been 
passing  through,  seems  for  no  less  an  object  than  a  visit  to 
North  America.  It  has  been  a  deeply  interesting  time,  both 
on  our  own  account  and  that  of  our  dear  parents  and  children. 

My  dear  mother,  on  coming  to  Darlington,  observed  me 
look  oppressed ;  and  one  morning,  meeting  me  on  the  stairs, 
and  questioning  me  closely  as  to  the  cause,  I  confessed  to  her 
what  was  on  my  mind.  She  looked  very  serious  for  a  moment, 
and  then  quietly  said,  "  Though  He  slay  me,  yet  will  I 
trust  in  Him."  I  did  not  let  anyone  else  know  (except  of 
course  my  husband),  till  the  beginning  of  last  week,  when 
our  dear  children  and  most  of  our  near  connexions  were 
informed  of  it :  this  was  very  atfecting  work,  and  brought  my 
soul  into  deep  waters.  But  every  disclosure,  as  it  seemed  to 
confirm  my  faith,  bound  me  more  closely  to  it,  so  that  at 


74 


1830. 


[/ET.  43. 


our  Monthly  Meeting,*  last  Third-day,  I  laid  the  prospect 
before  my  friends,  my  dear  husband  giving  himself  up  to 
go  with  me.  It  was  a  very  affecting  time;  my  father  and 
mother  and  two  daughters  being  there,  and  many  of  our 
dear  friends  and  relations.  My  soul  was  deeply  humbled, 
and  I  was  broken  to  pieces ;  but  the  way  seemed  made 

*  The  Substance  of  H.  C.  Backhouse's  remarks  in  laying  before 
THE  Monthly  Meeting  her  prospect  of  visiting  America. 

The  time  seems  come  when  I  must  claim  the  notice  of  my  friends, 
and  I  can  truly  say  that  it  is  under  an  awful  sense  of  the  greatness  as 
well  as  the  goodness  of  God,  that  I  venture  to  acknowledge  that  my 
mind  has  often  been  led  to  admire  and  adore  his  power,  and  whilst  it 
has  been  matter  of  humbling  consideration  that  He  should  deign  to 
employ  so  mean  an  instrument  in  any  part  of  his  work  or  service,  my 
spirit  has  been  enabled  and  made  willing  to  bow  in  entire  submission 
to  his  holy  righteous  will,  and  to  dedicate  myself, — all  that  I  am,  and 
all  that  I  possess, — in  simple  obedience  to  his  requirings.  For  many 
years  I  have  seen  that  if  I  continued  alive  in  the  Truth,  yielding  faith- 
fully, in  the  integrity  of  my  heart,  to  the  leadings  of  my  great  Lord 
and  Master,  I  should  be  called  to  more  extensive  labours  to  promote 
his  great  cause  in  the  earth,  and  to  travel  in  distant  and  remote  lands. 
And  now  of  later  time  the  call  has  appeared  louder,  and  in  endeavour- 
ing to  dwell  near  to  Him  who  I  reverently  believe  has  thus  called  me 
into  his  service,  there  has  seemed  no  other  way  but  to  stand  resigned, 
giving  up  all,  and  faithfully  following  the  Divine  requirings.  It  has 
appeared  that  if  I  would  not  forfeit  that  sense  of  acceptance  with 
my  Maker,  wliich  I  value  beyond  every  earthly  joy,  I  must  cross  the 
waves  and  billows  of  the  great  ocean,  and  visit  the  Churches  on  the 
continent  of  North  America. 

In  thus  opening  to  jon  this  solemn  subject,  I  am  deeply  sensible  of 
the  extent  of  the  sacrifice  to  be  made,  surrounded  as  I  am  by  comforts 
abundantly  enjoyable,  and  it  seems  as  near  giving  up  my  life  as  pos- 
sible. I  have  then  to  solicit  for  my  friends  at  this  awful  hour  the  spirit 
of  judgment  and  discernment,  that  they  may  try  this  thing  with  me 
and  for  me.  Here  are  present  those  to  whom  I  owe  my  natural  life,  and, 
much  more,  here  are  those  who  are  very  dependent  upon  me, — those 
to  whom  I  am  bound  in  the  nearest  and  tenderest  bonds  of  relationship, 
— those  to  whom  I  am  and  have  long  been  united  in  the  holy  bonds  of 
Christian  unity  and  fellowship,  the  fellowship  of  religious  exercise  and 
suffering.  Many  of  these  will,  I  am  well  persuaded,  feel  deeply  witli 
me  ;  but  these  I  resign  a  whole,  and  I  trust  living  offering  to  my  God,  in 
faith  in  his  mercy  and  goodness,  and  am  prepared  so  that  He  graciously 
go  with  me  to  travel,  it  may  be  for  years,  in  distant  lands,  to  preach  the 


-ET.  43.J 


1830. 


75 


straight  before  us,  and  in  the  minds  of  onr  friends,  so  that  wo 
could  do  no  other  than  yield  to  this  prospect  of  manifested 
duty  in  the  renewed  persuasion  that  He  who  calleth  is  also 
able  to  give  strength  for  his  own  work,  and  to  enable  us  to 

unsearchable  riches  of  Christ,  to  declare  that  the  beloved  Son  of  God 
hath  indeed  come  in  the  flesh,  and  also  to  point  to  his  coming  by  his 
Spirit  in  the  heart  of  man. 

T  have  now  only  to  pray  for  the  help  of  your  spirits,  and  to  acknow- 
ledge that,  through  all  my  conflicts,  I  have  been  mercifully  helped  of 
Him  whom  I  desire  evermore  to  serve. 

The  following  is  the  Certificate  issued  by  the  Monthly  Meeting : — 

To  THE  Yearly,  Quarterly,  and  Monthly  Meetings  of  Friends  in 
North  America — where  these  may  come. 

Dear  Friends, 

Our  dear  friend,  Hannah  Chapman  Backhouse,  has  in  a 
solemn  and  impressive  manner  imfolded  to  us  a  prospect  which  she 
has  had  for  some  years  past  of  paying  you  a  religious  visit,  believing 
that  the  time  is  now  come  when,  through  the  constraining  love  of  Him 
who  died  for  us  "  without  the  gate"  of  Jerusalem,  she  is  required  to 
surrender  all  to  her  gracious  Lord,  and  stand,  in  the  obedience  of  faith, 
resigned  to  this  service. 

Under  a  solemn  covering,  we  have  been  favoured  to  enter  into  near 
sympathy  with  her  in  this  extensive  prospect  of  arduous  labour,  and 
to  feel  full  unity  and  concurrence  with  her  therein,  and  we  hereby 
certify  that  she  is  a  minister  of  our  religious  Society  in  good  esteem 
amongst  us.  And  our  dear  friend,  Jonathan  Backhouse,  having 
informed  us  that  he  has  believed  it  his  duty  to  accompany  his  beloved 
wife  through  a  part  or  the  whole  of  her  religious  engagements  in  your 
land,  we  have,  upon  serious  consideration,  felt  unity  and  much  sympathy 
with  him  herein.  We  certify  on  his  behalf,  that  he  is  a  minister  of  our 
Society  in  good  esteem  amongst  us,  and  that  he  has  settled  his  children 
and  outward  affairs  to  the  satisfaction  of  his  family  and  friends. 

We  now  recommend  them  to  your  brotherly  care  and  sympathy,  but 
especially  to  the  care  and  keeping  of  Israel's  uuslumbering  Shepherd  ; 
and  may  He  condescend  during  tlieir  labours  of  love  in  your  land, 
whether  amongst  you,  or  as  Truth  may  open  the  way  amongst  those 
not  under  our  name,  to  overshadow  them  with  his  wing,  owning  their 
labours  to  your  edification  and  his  praise. 

With  the  salutation  of  love, 

We  remain, 

Your  Friends. 

Signed  in,  and  on  behalf  of  Darlington  Monthly  Meeting,  hekl  at 
Darlington,  the  16th  of  llie  lliird  month,  1830. 


76 


1830. 


[.'EX.  43. 


commit  our  many  precious  outward  blessings  to  his  care  and 
keeping. 

"  Strong  and  of  good  courage"  as  she  undoubtedly 
was,  yet  it  was  no  small  favour  to  her  that  in  this 
journey  she  had  the  co-operation  of  her  beloved  hus- 
band. Not  only  did  he  truly  share  in  her  religious 
exercises,  but  his  energy  and  perseverance  of  character, 
with  his  cheerful  and  affable  disposition,  often  contri- 
buted to  smooth  the  trials  and  difficulties  attendant 
upon  such  an  undertaking.  Under  the  pressure  of  this 
concern  he  writes  : — 

To  M,  AND  M.  J.  Leckey. 

6th  of  2nd  mo.,  1830. 

My  Dear  Friends, 

I  am  sure  will  feel  for  us  under  our  present 
appalling  prospects.  I  can  scarcely  estimate  tlie  full  extent 
of  the  sacrifice^  it  is  indeed  nothing  short  of  giving  up  all, 
but  I  desire  to  be  amongst  the  number  of  those  who  count 
nothing  too  near  or  too  dear  to  part  with  for  the  Gospel's 
sake,  and  though  it  is  a  very  deep  plunge  whichever  way  we 
view  it,  I  feel  thankful  in  being  enabled  to  trust  that  He  who 
calls  for  the  sacrifice,  will  sustain  and  preserve  us  under  it, 
and  our  dear  lambs  also. 

J.  Backhouse. 

To  Esther  Wheeler. 

Darlington,  8th  of  2ud  mo.,  1830. 

From  the  language  of  thy  last,  and  the  en- 
couragement which  it  contained,  and  which  at  the  time  I  was 
in  almost  too  sore  a  state  to  know  how  to  relish,  thou  mayst 
not  be  surprised  to  hear  that  at  oiu*  last  ]\Ionthly  Meeting  I 
was  strengthened  to  lay  before  it  a  prospect  of  visiting  North 
America ;  the  plunge  which  it  has  caused,  thou  mayst  more 
easily  suppose  than  I  can  describe.  The  separation  from  my 
dear  father  and  mother,  and  children,  costs  many  a  tear,  and 
will  if  it  takes  place  cost  many  more,  but  the  belief  that  it  is 
required  has  I  trust  never  once  forsaken  me.  Indeed  the 
whole  temper  of  my  soul  seems  so  altered  by  it  that  I  cannot 


Mv.  43.] 


1830. 


77 


but  believe  it  is  the  Lord's  doing,  and  if  He  is  pleased  to  call 
for  it,  it  is  but  a  reasonable  sacrifice  for  the  many  blessings 
which  He  has  showered  down  upon  me,  of  which  I  may 
esteem  it  the  greatest,  that  He  has  ever  counted  me  worthy 
to  be  employed  in  his  service. 

To  Mauy  James  Leckey. 

Darlington,  1st  of  3rd  mo.,  1830. 

This  mighty  engagement  is  turning  over  a  new 
leaf  in  my  life ;  I  have  been  in  the  deeps  indeed,  but  not  in 
darkness.  I  was  this  morning  struck  with  reading  in  the  last 
chapter  of  Luke,  that  after  the  disciples  were  commanded  to 
"  go  teach  all  nations,"  whilst  waiting  for  power  from  on  high 
at  Jerusalem,  as  they  were  also  commanded,  they  "  were 
continually  in  the  temple  blessing  and  praising  God."  A 
measure  of  this  state,  I  think  I  have  also  of  late  been  intro- 
duced into,  so  that  the  present  moment  seems  wonderfully 
my  own,  in  which  T  can  partake  of  the  many  comforts  and 
blessings  with  which  I  am  surrounded.  During  my  father 
and  mother's  stay,  my  mind  was  almost  continually  in  a  state 
of  inexpressible  tenderness — the  idea  of  leaving  them  and 
the  children  nearly  always  before  me — their  tenderness 
towards  me,  and  their  resignation  under  the  dispensation, 
very  striking.  They  were  with  us  about  six  weeks,  a  memo- 
rable time  to  all — the  parting  most  affecting,  but  the  solemn 
covering  over  us  seemed  to  speak  the  language,  "  I  will  not 
leave  thee  nor  forsake  thee." 

Jonathan  and  Hannah  C.  Backhouse  were  Kberated 
hy  the  full  concurrence  of  the  Quarterly  Meeting,  and 
of  the  Yearly  Meeting  of  Ministers  and  Elders.  The 
certificate  of  the  lattei"  Meeting  is  subjoined.* 

*  From  Oqr  Yearly  Meeting  of  Ministers  and  Elders,  held  in 
London  by  Adjournments,  on  the  17th,  18tii,  19th,  and  29th 
OF  the  5th  Month,  1830. 

To  Friend.s  in  North  America, 

Dear  Friends, 

Our  beloved  friend,  Hannah  Chapman  Backhouse,  who 
is  a  minister  in  good  esteem  amongst  us,  has  in  a  weighty  and  ini- 


78 


1830. 


[.ET.  43. 


They  embarked  at  Livei-pool,  in  tlio  "  Hibernia," 
(Captain  Maxwell)  on  the  4th  of  Eighth  Month. 
A  few  days  previously  H.  C.  Backhouse  writes  : — 

Liverpool,  30tli  of  7th  mo.,  1830. 

My  Dearest  Parents  and  Children, 

In  the  peace  that  has  been  my  possession  since 
the  bitterness  of  parting  with  you  was  over,  I  have  got 
through  the  quick  succession  of  duties  that  have  presented 
themselves,  with  more  than  usual  satisfaction.  It  must  be 
the  work  of  Him  who  can  still  the  waves  and  winds,  or  I 
could  not  feel  as  I  have  done,  separated  from  all  so  inexpres- 
sibly dear  to  me. 

The  journal  now  takes  the  form  of  a  continuous  letter 
to  her  family  : — 

1th  of  dith  mo. — The  wind  fair,  the  day  fine,  and  the  coast 
of  Ireland  disappearing.    My  mind  enough  at  peace  to  bear 

pressive  raanuer  informed  us  that  for  several  years  she  has  believed  it 
would  be  her  duty  to  pay  a  religious  visit  in  Christian  love  on  your 
Continent,  and  that  she  apprehends  the  time  is  now  come  for  her  to 
enter  upon  this  arduous  service. 

This  meeting  has  been  favoured  with  a  precious  degree  of  solemnity 
whilst  deliberating  upon  this  important  subject,  and  much  unity  and 
sympathy  have  been  felt  and  expressed. 

Our  dear  friend,  Jonathan  Backhouse,  who  is  also  a  minister  in 
good  esteem,  has  at  the  same  time  in  a  feeling  manner  informed  us 
that  he  believes  it  to  be  his  religious  duty  to  accompany  his  wife  in  the 
performance  of  this  visit,  and  with  his  proposal  also  much  sympathy 
and  unity  have  been  felt  and  expressed. 

We  therefore  believe  it  right  to  leave  these  our  dear  Friends  at 
liberty  to  proceed  on  this  important  engagement.  We  commit  them 
to  the  protecting  care  of  the  Lord  Almiglity,  fervently  desiring  that 
He  may  be  graciously  pleased  to  endue  them  with  wisdom  and  strength 
to  perform  his  will — that  He  may  preserve  them  on  every  hand,  grant 
them  from  time  to  time  the  consolation  of  his  Spirit,  and,  if  consistent 
with  his  good  pleasure,  bring  them  back  in  peace. 

Eecommending  them  to  your  Christian  kindness  and  sympathy,  and 
desiring  that  their  labour  of  love  may  be  to  the  edification  of  those 
amongst  whom  they  travel,  we  remain,  in  the  love  of  the  Gospel  of 
our  Lord  and  Saviour,  J esus  Christ, 

Your  affectionate  Friends, 

Signed,  in  and  on  behalf  of  the  Meeting, 

William  Allen,  Clerk. 


^T.  43.] 


1830. 


79 


external  miseries  Avith  patience.  In  the  afternoon  I  went  on 
cleek,  and  enjoj'ed  some  pleasant  conversation  with  a  gentle- 
man and  lady  from  Boston,  named  Grey — young-  people 
returning  from  the  Continent  after  spending  the  winter  at 
Florence  on  account  of  her  health.  They  have  a  little  boy 
of  two  years  old,  arid  a  sweet  babe  of  five  months,  who  is  a 
great  favourite  with  all. 

Sth,  First-day. — I  awoke  this  morning  in  fear,  and  not 
very  well.  We  had  a  light  fair  breeze,  and  the  sea  was  calm  ; 
not  a  sail  to  be  seen,  but  one  level  horizon  of  water.  My 
husband  had  spoken  to  the  captain  and  gentlemen  at  the 
breakfast  table  about  reading  in  the  course  of  the  day,  and 
they  agreed  that  the  passengers  and  crew  should  assemble  on 
deck  at  one  o'clock.  I  felt  not  a  little  exhausted  and  sunk, 
but  keeping  very  quiet  was  refreshed,  and  went  on  deck. 
All  had  their  better  clothes  on,  and  the  appearance  of  a 
Sabbath  was  cheering.  I  sat  on  deck  and  thought  of  you, 
and  of  my  friends  in  their  meetings,  believing  that  many  of 
their  thoughts  would  be  turned  towai'ds  us.  Yours  I  can 
have  no  doubt  of.  The  company  assembled  on  deck, — fifty 
people  perhaps.  After  a  short  prayei",  which  I  trust  it  was 
right  for  me  to  oflPer,  my  husband  read  the  fifth  chapter  of 
Matthew;  then  our  friend  Grey  a  tract  addressed  to  seamen; 
then  my  husband  the  107th  Psalm.  We  both  addressed 
them.    The  meeting  concluded  in  some  real  solemnity. 

9th. — My  husband  has  conversed  with  the  crew.  Some  of 
them  are  very  dark  and  savage-looking,  and  such  professed 
unbelievers  that  they  do  not  acknowledge  the  immortality 
of  the  soul.  They  can  read,  and  are  not  ignorant  of  the  Bible. 
It  seems  to  me  as  hard  to  make  an  impression  on  such 
minds  as  to  influence  the  course  of  the  winds. 

Seventh-day. — The  wind  continued  rising  through 
Second-day  night,  and  on  Fourth-day  blew  so  stiong  that  we 
were  much  tossed,  and  most  of  us  were  made  very  ill.  I  was 
entirely  confined  to  my  berth  :  truly  it  was  a  sufi"ering  state 
to  be  in  !  Surely  if  a  few  days'  voyage  had  been  appointed  for 
a  punishment,  some'  humane  people  would  think  themselves 
bound  to  get  it  abolished  !  To  be  at  sea  with  a  very  guilty 
conscience  must  be  terrible. 


80  1830.  [.ET.  43. 

On  First-day  the  15tli,  they  again  assembled  with 
the  passengers  and  crew,  for  rehgious  worship,  after 
which  II.  C.  Backhouse  remarks  : — 

I  hope  that,  altogether,  there  might  be  some  service  in  it. 
What  a  very  interesting  book  the  Polynesian  Researches 
is !  My  husband  reads  it  to  me  while  I  lie  down.  I  only 
retire  into  my  den  as  into  the  cell  of  a  prison,  out  of  which 
the  hope  of  escape  in  due  time  is  cheering.  My  husband 
seems  doctor  on  board,  and  our  medicines  have  come  into 
use. 

22nd,  First-day. — The  weather  calm,  and  we  assembled 
again  round  the  dining-table — some  of  our  companions  absent 
from  choice,  one  or  two  not  well.  I  was  refreshed  by  the 
exertion,  and  so,  I  trust,  were  some  others  also.  The  banks 
of  Newfoundland  were  announced  the  first  thing  this  morning, 
— quite  cheering  news. 

— Another  very  fine  morning.  Rose  early  and  enjoyed 
the  air  on  deck.  I  breakfasted  at  the  table,  and  a  chapter 
in  the  Bible  was  read  afterwards,  which  was  a  comfort  to  me. 

30/A. — This  day  is  calm.  My  dear  husband  has  been 
reading  to  me  The  loss  of  the  "  Kent.''  I  think  I  hardly 
ever  heard  anything  more  affecting.  He  has  also  read  to  me 
in  the  book  of  Samuel,  which  I  have  thoroughly  enjoyed. 
The  hope  of  land,  which  with  a  high  fair  wind  was  uppermost 
in  all  hearts  a  few  days  ago,  is  settling  into  a  more  quiet 
and  patient  state. 

\st  of  9th  mo. — Took  up  by  the  sides  of  the  vessel  what  is 
supposed  to  be  the  spawn  of  the  mackerel,  looking  from  the 
ship  like  blue  gems  about  the  size  of  a  small  pea.  They  are 
white  gelatinous  substances,  with  a  small  speck  of  bright 
blue,  which  gives  the  tinge  to  the  whole.  We  suppose  it 
must  be  the  same  substance  that,  at  night,  looks  like  glow- 
worms. This  day  passed  more  pleasantly  than  most,  the  idea 
of  land  so  near  was  gladdening ;  the  wind  sprang  up  early  in 
the  morning,  and  carried  us  joyously  over  the  deep  at  the 
rate  of  nine  or  ten  miles  an  hour.  I  was  again  made  ill  with 
it;  but  "land  a-hoy  !  "  first  discovered  by  a  passenger,  (for 
we  were  nearer  than  the  captain  had  calculated),  roused  us 


.V.T.  43.] 


1830. 


81 


very  early  upon  deck  to  see  it.  At  breakfast  all  were  in 
spirits ;  and  now  the  hour,  as  formerly  the  day,  of  arrival  was 
our  theme.  On  we  went  rapidly,  till  about  noon,  when  the 
wind  calmed.  It  was  soon  made  known  at  New  York  that 
our  vessel  was  in  sight.  The  first  boat  reached  us  about 
twenty  miles  from  port, — sent  out  for  the  news.  As  we 
brought  the  first  intelligence  of  the  French  Revolution,  our 
importance  was  increased.  The  loveliness  of  the  day — the 
number  of  vessels — the  variety  of  the  coast,  and,  above  all,  the 
fact  that  we  were  coming  into  port,  gave  an  animation  to  the 
feelings  of  all,  not  soon  to  be  forgotten.  We  requested  an 
early  dinner,  that  as  we  drew  near  the  land  we  might  see 
all  the  beauties  of  the  scene.  The  meal  was  a  quiet  one — 
less  talking  than  usual.  The  pause  which  my  husband  re- 
quested afterwards,  was  a  solemn  one,  and  I  believe  that 
many  felt  the  thanksgiving  which  he  ofi^ered  for  the  care 
extended  over  us,  and  the  many  mercies,  both  spiritual  and 
temporal,  which  we  had  received.  I  rose  from  table  with  a 
heart  light  enough  thoroughly  to  enter  into  the  beauty  and 
interests  of  the  view  before  us.  The  sun  set  in  splendour, 
and  the  charm  of  the  American  atmosphere  was  very  con- 
spicuous. The  moon  rose  opposite,  and  we  soon  perceived 
that  it  was  eclipsed.  It  was,  we  understood  afterwards,  a 
total  eclipse.  All  seemed  to  know  their  destination  but  our- 
selves, till  a  kind-looking  young  man  Friend  (who  had  come 
to  see  after  us,)  told  us  we  were  to  lodge  at  Hannah  Eddy's  ; 
and  John  R.  Willis  also  coming  on  board,  accompanied  us 
to  our  home,  which  has  proved  a  very  comfortable  one. 

Many  Friends  have  called  upon  us,  giving  us  a  very  kind, 
and  some  might  say  flattering  welcome.  I  thought  of  my 
dear  mother,  and  how  fearful  she  would  be  to  have  her 
children  so  noticed.  However,  if  I  may  I)ut  be  preserved, 
occupying  rightly  my  own  sphere,  whether  I  am  great  or 
little  in  the  eyes  of  others  is  of  little  importance,  and  I  hope 
I  may  feel  it  so. 

At  the  close  of  the  following  day  on  which  they  had 
attended  the  meeting  for  worship  at  New  York,  H.  C. 
Backhouse  writes  : — 

5th. — I  did  feel  it  a  very  serious  thing  to  go  to  this  meet- 

G 


82 


1830. 


[.KT.  43. 


ing  ;  but  I  was  quiet,  and  tnisted  that  He  wlio  had  hitherto 
helped  us  would  again  be  present  to  guide  and  to  uphold. 

8///. — We  went  to  meeting,  which  was  a  very  small  one ; 
the  Hicksites*  have  taken  the  old  Meeting-house,  and  all  the 
property  belonging  to  the  Society  in  New  York.  This  subject 
is  the  frequent  topic  of  conversation,  which  I  am  not  inclined 
to  encourage,  and  which  is  wearing  out ;  but  we  hear  enough  to 
believe  that  it  must  have  been  a  time  of  great  suffering  and 
perplexity,  and  that  the  visits  of  the  English  Friends  one 
after  another  have  been  eminently  useful.  William  Forster's 
visit  has  been  truly  valued. 

9th. — Went  to  the  Refuge,  an  institution  for  boys  and 
girls  who  have  been  convicted  of  theft,  &c.  It  was  interest- 
ing to  see  them  at  work.  Above  a  hundred  of  them  were 
making  brushes,  and  working  in  cane.  John  Griscome 
had  been  active  in  establishing  this  Refuge,  and  Friends  con- 
tinue so  in  attending  to  it.  The  extent  of  country  and 
meetings  is  almost  appalling,  both  in  New  England  and  the 
Yearly  Meeting  of  New  York.  "  In  patience  possess  thy 
soul,"  must  continually  be  my  watchword;  I  mean  not  so 
much  in  external  things,  for  this  I  hope  I  may  be  brought  to 
do,  but  in  feeling  my  own  emptiness  and  blindness,  and  how 
I  am  to  go  in  and  out  before  this  people  !  I  have  felt  great 
love  for  them,  for  many  individuals  especially;  and  most 
truly  kind  they  are  to  us. 

Wth. — We  made  a  call  on  ,  now  the  principal 

man  among  the  seceders,  whom  Friends  so  much  loved  that 
they  grieve  over  his  loss  more  than  over  that  of  most.  It  will 

*  The  reader  is  doubtless  aware  of  the  sad  conflict  in  which  some  of 
the  Yearly  Meetings  of  Friends  on  the  American  continent  had  for  a 
few  years  previous  to  this  time  been  involved,  through  a  wide-spread 
schism  in  reference  to  the  fundamental  doctrines  of  the  Gospel,  and  of 
the  consequent  secession  of  a  large  number  of  those  who  had  been  in 
religious  connexion  with  our  Society.  EUas  Hicks,  who  was  their 
leader,  had  gradually  imbibed  opinions  that  appear  to  have  nearly 
approximated  to  deism,  yet  masked  by  a  specious  profession  of  high 
spirituality.  Many  of  the  meeting-houses,  burial-grounds,  and  other 
property  of  the  Society,  were  taken  possession  of  by  the  seceders, 
where  they  formed  the  more  numerous  party  ;  but,  in  the  majority  of 
cases,  legal  decisions  were  obtained  in  the  civil  tribunals  of  the  different 
States,  in  favour  of  those  who  adhered  to  the  original  doctrines  of  the 
body. 


.KT.  43.] 


1830. 


83 


indeed  require  wisdom  to  have  the  right  communication,  if 
any  at  all,  with  this  peo2>le. 

ISth. — Samuel  Parsons  came  for  us  in  his  carriage,  and 
took  us  to  his  pleasant  dwelling  eight  miles  off.  The  road 
lay  through  a  country  poorly  cultivated.  Except  the  weeping 
willow,  I  have  not  yet  seen  a  tree  that  could  be  called 
fine.  The  world  is  a  wilderness  without  man,  and  it  requires 
labour  and  time  to  bring  him  and  his  land  into  decency 
and  order. 

15th. — We  had  a  very  pleasant  drive  to  the  Monthly 
Meeting  at  Westbury.  Mary  King  and  Mary  Parsons  were 
our  agreeable  companions;  the  road  was  good,  the  soil  light 
and  sandy.  Locust  trees,  which  are  a  species  of  acacia, 
abound,  and  are  one  of  the  most  valuable  products  of  Long 
Island.  This  tree  grows  rapidly,  and  its  durability  is  greater 
than  that  of  almost  any  other ;  it  is  much  used  in  shipbuilding. 
The  Monthly  Meeting  was  an  interesting  one ;  close  to  it  the 
Hicksites  were  holding  theirs,  in  the  Meeting-house  formerly 
belonging  to  Friends.  The  number  of  Friends  on  this  island 
is  small ;  but  I  think  those  who  remain  are  a  chosen  few,  who 
do  know  in  what  they  believe,  but  their  trials  have  indeed 
been  great :  hardly  a  family  in  which  some  of  the  members 
do  not  go  to  a  different  Meeting-house, — husbands  and  wives, 
parents  and  children,  brothers  and  sisters  separated  from 
each  other. 

17ih. — Made  a  few  calls  and  returned  to  Flushing.  We 
find  a  hearty  welcome  among  these  farmers,  who  are  living 
upon  their  estates  in  greater  abundance  and  comfort  than 
those  of  the  same  class  in  England.  They  appear  more 
intelligent  and  active,  and  can  certainly  make  a  living  with 
much  less  toil  than  our  farmers. 

\9th. — The  morning  meeting  with  Friends  this  day  was 
refreshing,  a  preparation  for  that  in  the  afternoon,  which  was 
truly  formidable  :  the  neighbours  had  been  very  generally 
invited,  and  they  are  almost  all  Hicksites.  Our  meeting- 
house was  nearly  filled,  and  several  of  those  who  attended 
were  of  the  more  moderate  class  of  the  seceding  body.  I 
believe  I  was  helped  to  declare  the  truth  in  plain  terms  with- 
out giving  offence  to  any  party.     I  felt  thankful  for  the 

(i  2 


84 


1830. 


[m\  43. 


meeting,  which  has  been  more  relieving  to  my  mind  than 
any  since  we  came  to  this  country. 

24<th. — I  am  glad  to  hear  that  dear  Jane  and  Ann  are 
reading  and  studying  the  Bible.  I  feel  my  own  want  of  a 
more  accurate  knowledge  of  Scripture ;  for  every  word  is 
sifted  in  these  sifting  times,  when  every  man  is  called  upon 
to  give  a  reason  for  the  hope  that  is  in  him,  or  he  may  be 
supposed  to  have  none.  I  cannot  say  how  much  I  should 
like  to  have  the  Bible  by  heart,  from  beginning  to  end ;  but 
this,  I  may  say,  never  will  be.  The  members  of  the  Select 
Meeting  were  convened  to  deliberate  upon  the  appointment  of 
a  meeting  for  the  Hicksites.  The  unity  of  Friends  was  very 
strengthening,  but  it  is  a  formidable  prospect. 

25th, — The  meeting  proved  one  that  I  understand  well 
satisfied  the  people  and  Friends ;  the  house  was  filled,  and 
several  of  the  Hicksites  and  doubtful-minded  were  present. 
I  have  not  often  been  more  helped  to  declare  the  truths  of 
the  Gospel. 

30th. — Went  to  Flushing,  in  order  to  hold  some  meetings 
in  parts  of  Long  Island  where  the  Hicksites  are  very 
numerous. 

1st  of  IQth  mo. — We  called  on  some  Hicksite  neigh- 
bours. One  of  them  advanced  such  doctrines  as  would  have 
astonished  you.  He  clearly  stated  that  we  received  no 
benefit  from  the  blood  of  Christ,  nor  any  harm  from  the 
transgression  of  Adam.  I  took  little  or  no  part  in  the  con- 
versation. Had  a  meeting  at  Oyster  Bay,  in  which  I  believe 
Scripture  truths  made  some  impression,  for  many  came  to 
shake  hands  with  us  afterwards  with  tears  in  their  eyes.  A 
considerable  number  of  Hicksites  were  present,  and  among 
them  the  man  who  had  talked  with  us  in  the  morning;  I 
hoped  he  was  a  little  softened,  and  that  some  of  them  may 
return  to  Friends  better  instructed  in  the  Christian  faith  than 
they  were  before. 

6th. — Monthly  Meeting,  in  which  Elizabeth  Coggeshall 
obtained  leave  to  accompany  us  to  Baltimore  Yearly  Meeting. 

12th. — On  the  steamboat  for  Philadelphia.  We  stopped 
at  Burlington,  and  for  a  minute  saw  Stephen  Grellet. 
Abigail  Barker,  an  agreeable  Friend,  very  kindly  came  on 


A^A\  13.] 


1830. 


85 


board  to  be  with  us :  we  enjoyed  her  company  during  our 
passage  to  Philadelphia,  where  we  arrived  before  eight  o'clock, 
and  were  very  kindly  welcomed  by  ThomasWistar  and  his  wife, 
who  took  us  to  their  house, — a  very  comfortable  abode. 

13ih. — Attended  Pine  Street  meeting.  It  was  small, — very 
few  men.  In  the  evening  we  took  tea  at  Jonathan  Evans', 
with  three  of  his  sons,  a  daughter,  and  daughter-in-law,  re- 
markably agreeable,  intelligent  people.  It  was  a  very  pleasant 
evening,  and  ended  with  more  than  conversation.  Friends 
are  printing  a  Bible  for  their  Bible  Society  here ;  we  saw 
some  proof  sheets  :  I  hope  to  send  one  over  when  they 
come  out. 

I5th. — At  seven  o'clock  we  were  in  the  steamer  which 
brought  us  to  Baltimore.  The  shores  of  these  noble  bays 
and  rivers  are  covered  with  abundance  of  wood,  and  the 
autumnal  tints  are  extremely  rich.  There  is  a  species  of 
oak,  whose  leaf  is  now  a  bright  crimson ;  and  we  see  every 
shade  of  colouring  from  that  to  the  yellow  and  green.  We 
wei'e  kindly  met  by  Gerard  Hopkins,  and  conducted  to  his 
house.  An  old  Friend  was  there  who  had  come  100  miles  on 
horseback  by  himself.  He  was  among  the  few  who  stood 
firm  in  a  large  district,  and  felt  his  mind  bound  to  attend 
this  Yearly  Meeting,  though  his  family  were  in  tears  at  the 
idea  of  the  journey  for  him. 

21st. — After  meeting,  we  were  taken  by  Israel  Morris  (a 
choice  Friend,)  to  see  a  coloured  man*  who  had  formerly  lived 

*  Extract  from  Jonathan  Backhouse's  Account  of  the  same  visit  : — 

He  has,  by  his  industry,  become  owner  of  his  own  house,  and  of 
thi-ee  or  four  adjoining  ones.  He  gives  his  children  a  good  education, 
and  he  has  enabled  many  of  his  coloured  brethren  to  purchase  their 
freedom,  by  lending  them  money,  which  he  says,  in  all  cases,  they  have 
repaid.  The  coloured  people  have  a  large  chapel,  and  I  was  truly 
gratified  in  seeing  the  number,  respectability,  and  serious  countenances 
of  many  of  them  in  coming  out  of  it  on  First-day.  A  short  time  ago, 
a  neighbouring  farmer,  from  want  of  cash,  sold  twelve  of  his  slaves, 
amongst  them  a  married  woman.  The  husband,  poor  fellow,  followed 
them  many  miles,  bemoaning  his  loss,  until  they  drove  him  back.  The 
farmer's  compassionate  feelings  prevented  his  resting  night  or  day,  and 
he  came  to  restore  them  to  each  other  ;  but,  alas  !  they  were  all  removed 
many  hundreds  of  miles.  The  anguish  he  suffered  made  him  im- 
mediately liberate  the  rest. 


80 


1830. 


[^T.  43. 


with  liim^  and  who  had  remarkably  prospered  in  the  world. 
His  cottage  was  very  ueat^  and  his  gratitude  to  Israel  Morris 
very  pleasant. 

This  ride  took  us  through  some  of  the  best  parts  of  the 
city,  and  near  a  beautiful  pillar  erected  to  the  memory  of 
Washington.  The  houses  are  built  of  excellent  bricks,  and 
the  door-steps  are  of  fine  white  marble.  The  evening  was 
spent  pleasantly,  making  calls  on  two  choice  Friends,  and 
taking  tea  with  a  large  party  at  the  Careys'.  There  are 
interesting  people  everywhere  ;  but  the  complete  sacrifice  of  a 
broken  and  contrite  spirit,  how  seldom  it  appears  to  be  made  ! 

Isi  of  11  th  mo. — A  full  day's  work  amongst  the  families; 
interesting  visits,  some  among  the  Hicksites. 

Srd. — Visited  several  families  in  the  morning.  Our  visits 
were  gladly  received,  and  the  day  ended  in  a  covering  of 
peace,  in  which  I  was  truly  refreshed. 

5th. — Rose  early,  and  came  in  the  steamboat  to  Philadel- 
phia. A  kind  reception  at  Thomas  Wistar's  was  very 
cheering. 

Glh. — Dined  at  home,  and  truly  like  a  home  I  find  Thomas 
Wistar's  house.  T.  and  M.  Wistar  have  the  true  qualifica- 
tions of  a  father  and  mother  to  those  in  our  circumstances, 
and  I  never  felt  the  desire  stronger  to  be  under  the  wing  of 
such. 

7th. — Attended  Twelfth  Street  Meeting.  It  requires  some 
time  to  divest  myself  of  the  various  thoughts  that  arise 
from  seeing  myself  at  the  head  of  these  great  meetings,  with 
the  feelings  of  curiosity  that  are  excited  in  the  minds  of  others 
by  a  stranger  being  among  them.  I  have  sometimes  thought 
that  this  very  circumstance  must  do  the  meeting  harm  if  we 
are  not  really  in  our  right  places. 

Not  satisfied  without  returning  to  Baltimore,  H.  C. 
Backhouse  writes  : — 

Sth. — The  Wistars  encouraged  my  going  back  to  the  places 
we  had  left,  and  Israel  Morris  was  willing  to  accompany  us. 
On  board  the  steamer  we  met  an  interesting  young  Avoman, 
who  had  lost  her  husband,  a  child,  and  her  father.  She  had 
no  small  conflict  to  go  through  in  holding  fast  her  profession, 


^T.  43.] 


1830. 


87 


being  in  a  neighbourhood  in  which  ahnost  all  have  separated 
from  our  Society.  She  said  she  was  so  glad  to  be  in  the 
company  of  Friends,  that  she  wished  to  make  herself  known 
to  us,  and  very  kindly  invited  us  to  her  house.  There  seems 
no  end  to  the  cases  that  require  sympathy.  You  can  have 
little  idea  of  the  havoc  that  Hicksism  has  made  ;  it  is  as  if 
the  powers  of  darkness  had  been  let  loose.  Kindly  received 
by  Susanna  Needles,  and  arranged  for  a  public  meeting  next 
evening.  The  night  was  passed  more  comfortably  than  many 
previous  ones. 

10th. — Left  Baltimore  this  time  with  an  easy  mind.  It  is 
a  place  that  much  interests  me, — but,  interested  as  we  may 
become  for  places  and  individuals,  we  must  leave  them  in  the 
blessed  confidence  of  our  Heavenly  Father's  love  and  pity 
over  all  his  family. 

I2th. — Attended  the  Quarterly  Meeting  at  Deer  Creek  : 
not  twelve  women  present,  a  few  more  men, — the  relics  of  two 
considerable  Monthly  Meetings.  Some  interesting  individuals 
among  them. 

We  called  at  the  house  of  a  Hicksite,  and,  the  evening 
closing  in,  we  were  obliged  to  stay  and  accept  their  hospi- 
tality, which  was  cheerfully  bestowed.  We  had  much 
conversation.  Their  blindness  and  delusion  are  wonderful. 
It  is  surprising  how,  by  spiritualizing  Scripture,  they  make 
it  in  the  end  but  "  the  baseless  fabric  of  a  vision,"  and  the 
doctrine  of  the  guidance  of  the  Spirit  of  Truth  becomes 
(according  to  their  view  of  it,)  an  "  ifftiis  fatuus,"  a  delusion 
of  him  who  transforms  himself  into  an  angel  of  light. 

15th. — We  had  a  refreshing  time  after  breakfast,  and 
went  on  light-hearted  to  William  Jackson's,  a  Friend  who 
was  at  my  father's  house  twenty-six  years  ago.  He  met 
us  at  the  door  of  his  farm-house, — a  venerable  figure.  His 
knowledge  of  home  brought  you  all  so  before  me  as  to  make 
me  shed  tears  ;  but  we  were  comforted  by  this  interview  with 
some  who  are,  I  cannot  doubt,  of  the  excellent  of  the  earth. 
We  had  something  like  a  blessing  at  parting. 

16th. — Reached  the  Quarterly  Meeting  at  Concord,  which 
pi'oved  an  interesting,  refreshing  season.  Just  before  meeting, 
a  packet  of  letters  was  put  into  my  hand.  I  saw  you  were 
all  well ;  but  I  could  not  read  them  till  evening.  You  cannot 
tell  what  a  treat  your  letters  ai'c.    You  never  need  fear  my 


1830.  [.ET.  43. 

forgetting  you  ;  the  difficulty  is,  to  avoid  thinking  of  you  too 
much.  I  was  asked  at  one  place  if  I  had  father,  mother  and 
children.  "  How  blest  you  are  !  "  was  the  observation, 
which  was  striking  to  me,  as  I  may  sometimes  be  inclined  to 
begrudge  being  so  absent  from  you,  when  I  ought  to  think 
what  a  privilege  it  is  to  possess  you. 

19^A.— Lodged  at  W.  Jackson's.  Went  on  to  Wilmington, 
the  dear  old  man  riding  a  mile  or  two  with  us, 

21*^. — Attended  three  meetings  this  day.  I  hoped  to  have 
a  quiet  meeting  with  a  few  Friends  in  the  afternoon ;  but 
again  the  house  was  filled,  so  exercise  was  more  my  portion 
than  I  had  calculated  upon.  Afterwards,  my  soul  tasted  of 
those  consolations  that,  from  time  to  time,  renew  my  bodily 
as  well  as  mental  powers, 

2Srd. — We  had  a  pleasant  ride  with  Mary  Wistar,  sixteen 
miles,  to  a  farm-house.  The  hospitality  of  Friends  is  truly 
agreeable  :  driving  up  unexpectedly  to  their  doors  gives  them 
no  embarrassment,  but  the  best  seat  at  their  fireside  is  imme- 
diately offered  us  after  a  hearty  welcome,  and  then  all  the 
members  in  the  house  set  to  work  to  prepare  us  a  meal  and 
lodging,  and  light  a  fire  in  the  best  parlour;  and  shortlj"^ 
everything  bears  a  very  comfortable  aspect.  We  have 
abundance  spread  on  the  tea-table, — a  blazing  wood  fire, — 
buckwheat  cakes,  or  corn  cakes,  something  like  our  pan- 
cakes,— some  kind  of  cold,  and  sometimes  hot  meat,  and  salt 
fish, — very  good  bread,  and  toast  soaked  in  cream,—  preserved 
peaches,  almost  always.  Then,  all  having  put  on  a  better 
raiment,  we  sit  down  to  our  bountiful  provision,  which  a 
hearty  welcome  and  many  miles'  travelling  make  very 
agreeable. 

24th. — Attended  the  Select  Meeting  of  the  Falls  Quarterly 
Meeting.  I  was  so  low  that  I  longed  to  be  alone ;  but  on 
reading  the  passage  "Wash  and  anoint,"  I  went  into  the 
parlour  and  tried  to  practise  the  duty,  and  succeeded  all  the 
better  for  having  read  it. 

26th. — A  refreshing  small  meeting,  in  the  evening,  at 
Bristol. 

Some  weeks  were  now  spent  in  visiting  the  families 
of  Friends  in  New  York.  In  the  course  of  the  engage- 
ment, H.  C.  Backhouse  writes  : — 


.ET.  43.J 


1830. 


89 


This  discipline  seems  to  search  out  all  the  impure  corners 
of  my  heart,  shewing  me  how  much  the  world,  the  flesh, 
and  the  evil  one,  have  lurking-places  there,  and  impede, 
though  they  are  not  suffered  wholly  to  frustrate,  the  work  we 
are  engaged  in.  The  hearts  of  the  people  seem  much  opened 
to  receive  us ;  and  I  might  be  ashamed  of  myself,  as  I  often 
am,  at  being  so  reluctant  a  labourer. 

lO^A  of  \2th  mo. — Paid  seven  visits.  Saw  one  poor  woman, 
to  whom  I  believe  our  visit  was  a  comfort ;  so  I  hope  the  day 
was  not  spent  in  vain.  When  I  am  ready  to  faint,  I  rouse 
myself  by  the  thought  of  the  value  of  the  immortal  soul ;  and, 
if  my  friends  have  not  been  mistaken,  our  business  is  with 
its  health. 

I'oth. — A  visit  at  Samuel  F.  Mott's  that  might  repay  for 
many  days  and  hours  of  toil  and  labour. 

22nd. — Visited  a  poor  Friend,  who  has  not  been  able  to 
walk  for  fifteen  years,  confined  in  one  small  room,  often 
sufi^ering  great  pain;  but  her  countenance  bespoke  more  joy 
than  that  of  many  in  the  midst  of  outward  prosperity. 

27th. — My  dear  father  and  mother's  letter  of  the  20th  of 
10th  mo.  was  put  into  our  hands, — a  great  treat  and  comfort 
to  me.  The  political  news  from  England  was  also  very  inte- 
resting. I  found  myself  caring  for  it  much  more  here  than 
at  home ;  indeed,  on  many  occasions,  I  find  the  folly  of 
national  feeling  rising  in  my  mind, — a  feeling  I  am  always 
jealous  of  hurting  in  the  minds  of  others,  though  I  see  the 
absurdity  of  it.  I  have  enjoyed  hearing  of  my  dear  little 
Edmund,  and  receiving  his  nice  letter. 

Referring  to  the  death  of  a  relation,  she  says  : — 

That  the  dead  are  raised,  and  that  they  have  a  distinct  indi- 
viduality, we  must  believe,  or  our  faith  vrill  be  vain,  and  our 
preaching  vain ;  impossible  though  it  be  for  us,  while  clothed 
with  flesh  and  blood,  to  conceive  a  spiritual  body.* 

*  These  reflections  were  induced  by  the  unbelief  in  the  blessed 
doctrine  of  the  resurrection,  which  so  much  prevailed  amongst  the 
Hicksites. 

On  this  important  subject  it  may  be  proper  to  cite  the  following 


90 


1831. 


[/KT.  44. 


3rd  of  1st  mo.,  1831. — Tea  at  W.  T  's^  tlie  only  member 

of  the  party  wlio  was  a  Frieud ;  the  rest  were  Hicksites.  A  very 
trying  visit  it  was  to  me.  Our  next  visit  was  truly  refreshing 
to  a  convinced  Friend^  and  her  mother,  a  sweet  old  woman,  a 
Presbyterian.  In  the  relief  of  getting  out  of  the  last  house, 
and  the  comfort  of  being  in  this  (though  they  were  strangers 
to  me),  well  might  this  text  occur, — "  Every  spirit  that  con- 
fesseth  that  Jesus  Christ  is  come  in  the  flesh,  is  of  God." 
If  I  go  into  houses,  knowing  the  inmates  to  be  Hicksites, 
I  am  of  course  jealous  of  myself,  when  subjects  of  docti-ine 
occur ;  but  if  we  enter  a  room,  wholly  ignorant  of  the  party 
present,  and  have  pointed  things  to  say  on  doctrine,  and  to 

extracts  from  a  statement  of  Christian  doctrine,  issued  on  behalf  of  the 
Society,  in  the  year  1693,  as  given  in  the  Preface  to  the  Eules  of 
Discipline,  pp.  xi.  and  xii. : — 

"  Concerning  the  resurrection  of  the  dead,  and  the  great  day  of 
judgment  to  come,  beyond  the  grave,  or  after  death,  and  Christ's 
coming  without  us  to  judge  the  quick  and  the  dead  (as  divers  questions 
are  put  in  such  terms),  what  the  Holy  Scriptures  plainly  declare  and 
testify  in  these  matters  we  have  been  always  ready  to  embrace.  First, 
for  the  doctrine  of  the  resurrection,  if  in  this  life  only  we  have  hope 
in  Christ,  we  ai-e  of  all  men  most  miserable. — 1  Cor.  xv.  19.  We 
sincerely  believe  not  only  a  resurrection  in  Christ  from  the  fallen  sinful 
state  here,  but  a  rising  a'ud  ascending  into  glory  with  him  hereafter  ; 
that,  when  he  at  last  appears,  we  may  appear  with  him  in  glory. — 
Col.  iii.  4  ;  1  John  iii.  2.  But  that  all  the  wicked  who  live  in  rebellion 
against  the  light  of  grace  and  die  finally  impenitent  shall  come  forth 
to  the  resurrection  of  condemnation.  And  that  the  soul  or  spirit  of 
every  man  or  woman  shall  be  reserved  in  its  own  distinct  and  proper 
being  ;  and  every  seed  (yea,  every  soul,)  shall  have  its  proper  body,  as 
God  is  pleased  to  give  it. — 1  Cor.  xv.  A  natural  body  is  sown,  a 
spiritual  body  is  raised, — that  being  first  which  is  natural,  and  after- 
wards that  whicb  is  spiritual.  And  though  it  is  said  this  corruptible 
shall  put  on  incorruption,  and  this  mortal  shall  put  on  immortality  ;  the 
change  shall  be  such  as  flesh  and  blood  cannot  inherit  the  kingdom  of 
Cod  ;  neither  doth  corruption  inherit  incorruption. —  1  Cor.  xv.  We 
shall  be  raised  out  of  all  corruption  and  corruptibility,  out  of  all  mor- 
tality ;  and  the  children  of  God  and  of  the  resurrection  shall  be  equal 
to  the  Angels  of  God  in  Heaven.  And  as  the  celestial  bodies  do  far 
excel  tei-restrial,  so  we  expect  our  spiritual  bodies  in  the  resurrec- 
tion shall  far  excel  what  our  bodies  now  are.  Howbeit,  we  esteem  it 
very  imnecessary  to  dispute  or  question  how  the  dead  are  raised,  or  with 
what  body  they  come  ;  but  rather  submit  to  the  wisdom  and  pleasure  of 
Almighty  God." 


.•ET.  44.] 


1831. 


91 


apply  tliem  to  individuals,  and  we  find  the  application  is  just, 
it  is  a  confirmation  of  our  faith,  for  which  we  ought  to  be 
thankful.    In  several  instances  this  has  been  the  case. 

5//i. — Monthly  Meeting.  A  more  lively  occasion  to  my 
feelings  than  I  have  attended  for  many  a  day. 

Qth. — Paid  visits  among  poor  families,  or  rather  those  that 
live  by  day-labour ;  people  that  keep  a  cart  and  horse,  and 
are  employed  by  store-keepers.  These  carmen  come  from 
the  country,  and  if  they  are  industrious  and  sober  they  earn 
enough  to  buy  a  farm,  and  often  rise  to  much  comfort,  if  not 
to  wealth. 

13th. — Fine  frosty  morning;  thermometer  at  14°  Fahr.  We 
went  seven  miles  into  the  country  in  a  sleigh.  I  enjoyed  the 
ride,  and  thought  of  our  dear  children,  wishing  they  could 
have  had  the  pleasure  of  it.  Sleighing  is  all  the  fashion  :  we 
see  party  after  party  taking  their  rides,  some  in  handsome 
equipages. 

23rd,  First-day. — In  the  afternoon  we  went  to  an  appointed 
meeting  in  the  workhouse.  I  suppose  500  or  more  of  the 
inmates  were  present, — a  sadly  marred  assemblage  of  human 
beings.  Afterwards  went  to  the  House  of  Refuge  for  Juvenile 
oflPenders. 

25th. — Paid  three  or  four  visits  this  morning,  which  cheered 
me,  as  they  seemed  truly  acceptable,  and  were  to  the  poor 
and  little-looked-after. 

2nd  of  2nd  mo. — Purchase  Quarterly  Meeting  passed  com- 
fortably, and  we  spent  the  evening  with  Esther  Griffin  and 
her  daugher  Underbill,  an  interesting  woman  and  a  minister. 

4th. — After  we  were  foiled  this  morning  in  getting  off  by 
the  steamboat,  my  dear  persevering  husband  found  that  we 
had  yet  means  to  go  on,  and  we  reached  Trenton  at  half-past 
ten  o'clock. 

5th. — In  the  sleigh  about  half-past  six  o'clock.  The  scene 
about  sunrise  was  beautiful,  the  sun  shining  brilliantly  upon 
the  snow  and  ice. 

After  a  few  days  spent  in  Philadelphia,  attending 
meetings,  and  paying  visits, — 

9^^. — Went  to  German  Town,  to  Abington  Quarterly  Meet- 
ing. I  came  out  of  it  feeling  condemned  for  doing  too  much ; 


92 


1831. 


[jet.  44. 


the  most  humiliating  of  all  reproofs,  which  I  endeavoured  to 
bear  patiently.  Friends  of  this  place  were  turned  out  of 
their  meeting-house  by  the  Hicksites,  and  on  the  day  of 
separation  assembled  under  an  oak  in  the  yard ;  a  memorable 
meeting  it  was,  in  which  Ann  Jones  was  admirably  engaged. 

Thomas  Wistar  said  that  in  visiting  these  people  after 
their  separation,  they  often  met  with  great  abuse  ;  the  Avhip 
was  held  over  them,  doors  barred  against  them,  and  in  some 
instances  they  were  locked  into  the  room,  but  in  others  they 
were  treated  civilly,  and  in  one  instance  they  sat  in  solemn 
silence  with  their  opponents,  and  had  a  very  interesting 
interview.  This  country  is  not  clear  of  revolutionary  spirit, 
and  the  unwillingness  to  bear  restraint,  human  or  divine,  has 
been  much  at  the  root  of  the  matter  in  our  Society.  The 
Society  as  it  remains  after  the  storm,  is  I  should  think, 
possessed  of  as  many  true  Christians  as  any  religious  com- 
munity can  pretend  to, — people  you  would  admire  and  love, 
and  whom  I  may  often  wonder  we  should  be  sent  to  visit. 


4-t.J 


1831. 


93 


CHAPTER  VII. 

DEATH    OF    HER    FATHEE  PHILADELPHIA     YEARLY    MEETING  ELIZA 

P.  KIRKBRIDE  WE8TOWN  SCHOOL  NEW  YORK  YEARLY  MEETING  

friends'  BIBLE  MEETING  BOSTON  NEW  BEDFORD  NANTUCKET 

 RETURN     TO     PHILADELPHIA  CONVENTION     OF     THE  YEARLY 

MEETINGS. 

ISih,  First-dai/. — Little  did  I  think,  on  going  to  bed,  what 
the  morrow  was  to  be  to  me.  Before  I  rose,  my  dear  husband 
told  me  that  there  was  a  paragraph  in  a  newspaper  announcing 
the  sudden  death  of  my  dear  father.  At  first  I  did  not  know 
how  to  believe  it,  but  after  an  hour  or  two  he  shewed  me  the 
paper  directed  by  my  brother  Edward  Backhouse,  and  this 
seemed  to  put  the  truth  beyond  all  doubt.  I  remained  in 
bed  for  some  hours,  till  I  thought  it  better  to  rouse  myself 
and  dress,  remembering  my  dear  mother's  example  on  such 
occasions.  I  had  a  day  of  almost  continued  weeping,  in  my 
own  room,  but  joined  my  kind  friends  at  tea.  The  nearest 
relations  could  not  have  treated  me  with  more  real  kindness 
and  pleasant  attention ;  they  have  been  themselves  acquainted 
with  sorrow,  and  I  can  esteem  it  no  small  favour  that  the 
intelligence  has  found  us  circumstanced  as  we  now  are.  As 
to  bitterness  in  the  sorrow,  I  can  hardly  say  there  has  been 
that, — the  remembrance  of  my  dear  father  is  so  inexpressibly 
sweet.  May  his  example  help  to  stifle  the  rising  evils  of  my 
heart,  especially  that  of  not  bearing  with  cheerfulness  and 
equanimity  the  trials  of  life  ! 

I  shall  never  look  upon  his  like  again ;  but  we  are  bound 
to  be  reverently  thankful  that  we  have  so  long  had  near  us 
such  an  example,  such  a  companion,  and  such  a  friend !  In 
the  few  years  that  may  yet  remain  to  me,  his  mind  will,  I 
believe,  be  present  with  me,  as  the  sun  gives  its  light  long 
after  it  has  set.  Oh,  my  dear  father  !  there  is  surely  no 
mortal  who  has  brought  into  my  mind  so  strong  a  foretaste 


91. 


1831. 


[mt.  44. 


of  that  Ileaveu  into  which  I  crave  that  my  own  soul  and  the 
souls  of  men  may  be  gathered,  and  for  the  sake  of  which  I 
now  suffer.* 

A  short  time  after  H.  C.  Backhouse  writes  : — 

I  had  hoped  to  spend  this  week  in  the  house,  but  my 
husband  thought  we  must  not  lose  the  opportunity  of  going 
to  Salem  Quarterly  Meeting.  The  meeting  of  ministers  and 
elders  was,  I  believe,  with  a  "  poor  and  afflicted  people,"  and 
I  might  be  all  the  better  capable  of  ministering  to  them, 
from  what  my  own  mind  was  passing  through.  Though 
sorrowful,  I  did  not  feel  out  of  my  place.  I  believe  that  for 
a  few  moments,  nearer  access  to  the  Throne  of  Grace  had 
hardly  ever  been  granted  to  me ;  our  ties  to  another  world, 
strengthened  by  affliction,  might  have  brought  it  closer  to 
me.  This  is  a  small  remnant  of  the  once  large  Quarterly 
Meeting  of  Salem.     We  dined  at  the  house  of  a  sweet 

*  The  following  portraiture  of  Joseph  Gurney,  the  father  of  Hannah 
C.  Backhouse,  is  from  the  pen  of  his  nephew  J.  J.  Gurney  : — 

"  His  image  is  in  a  very  lively  manner  presented  to  my  mind  this 
afternoon.  Truly  he  was  a  man  in  ffood  liking,  of  a  handsome  build 
both  of  body  and  mind,  a  right  agreeable  companion,  fraught  with 
amiable  tempers,  sound  intellectual  powers,  playful  good-hnmour,  and 
above  all,  deep  humble  piety.  He  was  withal  no  man's  copy — a  man  of 
striking  integrity  and  independence  of  mind,  who  always  thought  for 
liimself;  and  when  any  proposition  or  sentiment  was  uttered  by  his 
companions  he  was  sure  enough  to  examine  the  other  side  of  the  ques- 
tion, and  picked  out  the  weakness  of  many  a  plausible  notion.  He 
generally  wore  a  smile,  and  knew  how  to  laugh ;  his  cheerfulness  did 
credit  to  his  religion,  and  was  the  happy  ornament  of  that  settled 
seriousness  which  ever  dwelt  within.  He  had  read  considerably,  and 
observed  largely  and  acutely ;  so  that  his  conversation  seldom  failed  to 
be  informing.  His  ministry  was  delivered  in  great  brokenness.  It 
was  lively,  refreshing,  original,  frequently  presenting  some  new  train 
of  thought  for  the  instruction  of  his  hearers.  I  often  think  of  the 
tenderness  and  love  which  so  peculiarly  marked  his  demeanour,  and 
shone  upon  his  features,  during  the  last  few  weeks  of  his  mortal  exis- 
tence. Truly  he  was  gathered,  I  reverently  believe,  as  a  shock  of 
corn  fully  ripe,  into  the  Lord's  garner.  Many  were  they  who  loved 
him  dearly  and  honoured  him  faithfully,  and  his  memory  will  not 
perish." 


.^.yr.  44.] 


1831. 


95 


woman  rriend,  whose  husband  is  a  Ilicksite, — thifi  is  separa- 
tion, of  the  bitterness  of  whicli  we  can  form  little  idea.  On 
our  return  to  Pliiladclphia,  we  received  a  packet  of  letters 
from  j^ou ;  we  took  them  into  our  chamber  to  weep  over 
them.  They  have  brought  you  into  an  inexpressible  nearness 
to  me,  audit  is  a  great  satisfaction  tons  to  find  that  my  dear 
cliildren  Iiave  been  such  a  comfort  to  my  beloved  mother. 
If  I  could  doubt  that  our  separation  from  you  at  this  time  is 
in  the  ordering  of  Him,  who  has  in  his  wisdom,  and  no 
doubt  in  his  mercy  too,  seen  meet  to  take  unto  himself  my 
dearly  beloved  parent,  it  would  be  hard  to  bear  indeed ;  but 
though  I  have  often  had  to  see  the  work  marred  by  the 
imperfection  of  the  instruments,  I  have  never  questioned 
that  it  was  right  for  us  to  come,  and  to  come  at  the  time  we 
did. 

24fA. — Went  to  the  Monthly  Meeting  in  Arch  Street, 
where  Ave  sat  long  in  silence.  I  was  peaceful,  though  low,  and 
believed  I  might  kneel  down  with  this  petition, — "  That  what- 
ever might,  in  the  counsel  of  unerring  wisdom,  be  our  allotted 
portion  of  suffering  or  of  conflict,  we  might  bow  in  submis- 
sion and  thankfulness,  desiring  that  our  Heavenly  Father's 
will  might  be  done ;  and  be  prepared,  when  our  pilgrimage  is 
over,  to  unite  with  the  redeemed  of  all  ages."  My  dear 
husband  added  a  few  lively  words,  and  I  believe  the  hearts  of 
many  were  touched.  Friends  seemed  peculiar!}'-  kind  and 
tender  towards  me,  and  I  felt  that  in  thi;s  endeavouring  to 
persevere  in  what  I  have  believed  to  be  my  Heavenly  Father's 
business,  my  spirit  was  drawing  nearer  to,  rather  than  being- 
further  separated  from,  those  most  dear  to  me  in  the  flesh, 
and  those  who  are  now  taken  out  of  it. 

Burlington,  2^th. — Sympathy  with  Stephen  Grellet  and 
his  wife  was  a  prominent  motive  in  bringing  us  hei'e. 

\st  of  2>rd  mo. — Stephen  Grellet  laid  his  concern  [for 
visiting  Europe]  before  the  men's  meeting,  but  the  women  in 
this  country  have  no  part  in  such  deliberations,  which  I  felt  a 
great  loss.  He  however  came  into  the  women^s  meeting,  and 
it  was  very  interesting  to  be  with  him. 

A  pleasant  ride  to  Mount  Holly  (John  Woolman's  meet- 
ing), where  my  husband  collected  the  few  Friends  together, 
and  w  e  had  iu  this  barn-like  place  a  very  refreshing  time. 


96 


1831. 


[mt.  44. 


In  the  evening  a  large  company,  probably  about  500,  were 
assembled  in  the  Baptist  Meeting-house.  People  were  very 
kind  to  us,  the  minister  inviting  us  to  come  again. 

6th. — Befoi'e  we  went  to  meeting,  some  letters  were  given 
me  which  mentioned  you.  I  sat  down  in  meeting  and  wept. 
No  one  spoke  for  a  long  time ;  at  length  I  rose,  having 
remembered  that  under  the  Law  the  people  were  not 
allowed  to  cut  themselves  for  the  dead,  and  especially  the 
priests  were  not  suffered  to  mourn  even  as  the  people.  This 
appeared  to  me  as  the  shadow,  to  show  that  the  true  believers 
must  not  mourn  as  those  who  had  no  hope  ;  hope  founded 
on  the  resurrection  from  the  dead,  brought  to  light  through 
the  gospel.  I  thought  what  I  had  to  say  might  be  for  others 
as  well  as  for  myself. 

10th. — After  a  meeting  at  Easton,  rode  on  to  Job  Haines's, 
a  valuable  elder  with  two  daughters,  who  welcomed  us  very 
heartily  to  a  small  clean  house.  This  country  is  divided  into 
farms  of  from  one  to  two  hundred  acres.  On  each  farm  there 
is  generally  a  house  with  three  or  four  rooms  on  the  first 
floor,  besides  a  back  kitchen,  and  a  number  of  small  rooms 
upstairs  filled  with  beds,  and  wherever  I  have  yet  been  they 
are  clean.  One  girl  or  helper,  is  generally  the  only  domestic  ; 
but  we  are  in  fact  better  waited  on  than  in  many  houses  in 
England  where  several  servants  aie  kept.  The  kindness  and 
hospitality  of  Friends  are  truly  refreshing,  and  though  I 
cannot  but  often  remember  my  home  indulgences,  both  of 
flesh  and  spirit,  I  do  not  know  where  I  could  be  better  pro- 
vided for,  away  from  you. 

11  th. — A  pleasant  ride  through  pine  trees,  which  abound 
in  these  parts ;  the  smell  is  so  m  holesome  at  certain  seasons, 
that  the  woods  are  resorted  to  for  their  salubrity.  It  is  said 
that  when  the  pine  wood  is  cut  down,  oak  springs  up  in  its 
place,  and  when  the  oak  is  cut  down,  then  the  pine  comes 
up, — a  peculiarity  not  accounted  for ;  but  nature  does  not 
like  sameness. 

12th. — Monthly  Meeting  at  Upper  Evesham  ;  one  of  the 
largest  that  we  have  attended.  A  very  interesting  testimony 
was  read  of  an  old  friend,  Elizabeth  Collins,  which  was  much 
felt  by  the  meeting,  by  whom  she  was  greatly  beloved.  I 
could  not  be  insensible  to  its  influence,  and  the  savour  of  the 


-CT.  44.  J 


1831. 


97 


spirits  of  tlie  just  docs,  I  believe,  not  nnfrcqncntly  cheer 
and  contrite  my  heart. 

ISih,  First-day. — A  very  large  public  meeting,  several 
Ilicksites  present.  Another  at  four  o'clock  at  Crosswell,  also 
large.  It  was  truly  laborious ;  but  at  the  end  of  the  day, 
impeiifect  as  I  had  felt  our  labours  to  be,  I  was  peaceful,  and 
had  some  sound  refreshing  sleep 

I4ih. — Came  on  to  the  Monthly  Meeting  at  Haddonfield. 
There  is  yet  a  considerable  body  of  Friends  here,  in  a  rather 
peculiarly  interesting  state.  They  had  recently  lost  many 
valuable  Friends,  and  are  left,  I  believe,  without  a  minister 
among  them.  Richard  Jordan  belonged  to  this  Quarterly 
Meeting.  I  said  little,  but  that  little  was,  I  suppose  appli- 
cable, as  Friends  appeared  truly  glad  of  our  company.  This 
little  roiind  has  revived  our  faith  that  it  has  been  right  for 
us  to  come  here,  and  also  animated  me  with  the  feeling  of 
getting  on  with  our  engagement. 

There  are  few  liours  in  which  you  are  not  in  my  mind.  I 
never  on  any  occasion  felt  removal  [by  death]  so  little  of  a 
separation.  That  ray  father  lives,  seems  ever  present  with 
me  :  "  He  that  liveth  and  believeth  in  me  shall  never  die." 

20th. — An  interesting  public  meeting  in  the  evening  at 
Camden,  in  the  Court-house,  where  a  very  important  trial 
between  Friends  and  the  Hicksites  (about  tlie  property  of 
the  Society),  is  going  forward.  Though  truly  our  labours 
are  abundant,  and  I  am  sometimes  inexpressibly  weary,  yet 
when  I  come  to  sit  down  quietly  by  myself  I  often  feel  very 
peaceful,  and  hope  that  at  the  end  of  them  I  may  do  the  same. 

4<th  of  4th  mo. — Melville,  almost  a  new  settlement.  The 
manufacture  of  glass  is  the  principal  occupation  of  this  place. 
There  is  a  sand  here  of  which  the  finest  glass  can  be  made, 
and  now  there  is  a  flourishing  and  increasing  manufacture  of 
it.  How  often  have  I  been  led  to  wisli  that  the  wisdom  of 
Christianity  had  prevailed  in  the  American  and  English 
Governments  ! — that  they  had  sought  to  do  good  and  to  com- 
municate, instead  of  barring  up  communication  as  they  have 
done  between  the  two  countries.  What  advantages  would 
have  resulted  to  both  from  the  free  interchange  of  commo- 
dities !  They  seem  so  to  belong  to  each  other,  that  even  these 

II 


98 


1831. 


[.F.T.  44. 


fetters  can  hardly  keep  them  asunder.  There  is  an  immense 
market  for  the  produce  of  English  manufactui-e,  and  it  is  a 
pity  we  are  not  allowed  to  partake  of  the  rich  abundance  of 
this  soil.  Took  the  road  to  the  Cumbei-land  Iron  Works. 
There  we  found  two  young  people,  members  of  our  Society, 
and  the  manager  very  kindly  disposed.  The  meeting  was 
held  at  one  o'clock,  and  a  ra\y-looking  set  of  people  had  some 
truths  told  them,  which  I  trust  made  an  impression.  After 
it,  we  went  on  our  way  rejoicing.  It  was  through  an  intricate 
forest  of  at"  and  pine  wood,  the  path  just  wide  enough  for 
the  carriage,  Avhich  got  many  a  blow  from  the  branches. 
The  evening  was  very  fine,  and  the  light  through  the  trees 
beautiful :  could  I  have  had  you  with  me,  my  cup  would  have 
been  full  indeed  !  "VYe  passed  through  miles  of  forest  that 
had  been  burned.  Seven  square  miles  of  timber  had  been 
consumed  in  this  conflagration. 

6th. — A  drive  for  fifteen  miles  through  almost  uninterrupted 
forest.    The  cedar  tree  is  in  blossom,  and  very  abundant. 

7th. — A  meeting  with  a  few  friends,  which  I  believe  was  a 
real  comfort  to  a  poor  afflicted  people. 

Philadelphia,  17th. —  We  lodge  at  our  kind  friends  the 
Stewardsons,  and  find  it  a  very  pleasant  and  convenient  home 
for  the  Yearly  Meeting. 

18//t. — The  Yearly  Meeting.  What  a  stripling  to  sit  at 
the  head  of  it !  More  than  1,200  or  1,300  persons  present  I 
should  think.  Oh  that  I  might  be  preserved,  doing  neither 
more  nor  less  than  enou2:li  I  Our  certificates  and  those  of 
other  Friends  were  read,  and  the  expression  of  unity  and 
sympathy  with  us  was  most  comforting.  My  heart  was  full, 
and  I  acknowledged  how  cordial  the  sympathy  of  Friends 
had  been  to  me,  reminding  me  of  those  times  when  we  were 
liberated  by  our  own  meetings ;  and  I  then  alluded  to  the 
circumstances  in  which  we  were  placed, — that  I  could  not 
weep  for  him  who  in  a  moment  was  taken  to  dwell  for  ever 
with  his  God  and  Saviour;  but  I  felt  it  no  small  trial 
to  be  parted  from  those  who  were  left,  and  concluded  with 
asking  their  prayers  for  our  preservation  in  faith  and  patience, 
that  nothing  might  be  able  to  separate  us  from  the  love  of 
God  in  Christ  Jesus.    Both  myself  and  the  meeting  felt  it, 


.KT.  -14.] 


1831. 


99 


andj  tliough  I  believe  an  appeal  to  natural  feelings  is  rarely 
in  the  ordering  of  the  Gospel,  on  this  oceasion  I  feared 
cutting  too  short,  rather  than  making  too  much  of  the 
subject. 

19th. — The  meeting  began  at  nine  o'clock — the  three  first 
queries  remarked  upon  in  a  very  lively  manner. 

23rd. — The  last  sitting  of  the  Yearly  Meeting,  which  might 
truly  be  said  to  be  owned  with  much  real  solemnity. 

24:th. — A  day  of  suffering  to  me.  Perhaps  it  would  not  be 
well  for  me  always  to  feel  that  I  have  chosen  the  right  path. 
I  have  more  and  more  to  know  that  mercy  is  our  only  refuge, 
and  to  be  often  comforted  when  under  the  rod,  in  the  belief 
that  it  is  part  of  the  appointed  discipline. 

About  this  time  H.  C.  Backhouse  first  met  the 
young  Friend  who  was  afterward  her  companion  in 
America,  and  with  whom,  during  the  remainder  of 
her  life,  she  was  united  in  the  bond  of  tenderest 
friendship. 

6ih  of  5th  mo.— I  had  the  company  of  Eliza  Kirkbride, 
for  whom  I  feel  much  interested.  She  has  been  a  very  gay, 
animated  young  person,  but  through  a  succession  of  afflictions 
is  become  quite  serious.  It  is  cheering  to  feel  that  we  may  have 
been  some  little  help  and  comfort  to  her,  she  is  left  without 
parents  exposed  to  a  great  deal  of  gay  [i.  e.  worldly]  society. 
I  make  acquaintance  with  many  characters  that  are  very  in- 
teresting to  me,  it  goes  to  my  heart  to  leave  them ;  but  I 
desire  simply  to  attend  to  our  business  : — and  oh  !  that  we 
may  be  favoured  with  right  direction  in  our  movements,  and 
cast  all  our  cares,  even  those  for  the  church,  on  Him  who 
careth  for  us. 

7th. — We  went,  with  our  dear  friend  Mary  Wistar,  to 
West  Town  school,  about  twenty  miles  off.  The  afternoon  was 
pleasant,  and  we  gathered  on  the  way  many  flowers,  some 
very  beautiful  ones  which  we  had  never  seen  before ;  a  scarlet 
flower  growing  in  a  meadow  particularly  attracted  our  atten- 
tion.   The  road  is  so  hilly  that  it  is  very  little  interruption 

H  2 


100 


1831. 


[iET.  44. 


to  our  progress  to  gather  them.  How  you,  my  clear  girls, 
would  have  enjoyed  this  ride  !  These  things  are  so  associated 
vnth  you  that  I  had  an  unusual  enjoyment  in  them;  without 
this  association  I  should  not  perhaps  pay  much  attention  to 
them.  We  arrived  at  four  o'clock,  and  spent  the  remainder  of 
the  day  chiefly  in  talking  with  the  girls,  and  looking  at  their 
botanical  specimens.  I  found  many  whose  relations  I  knew. 
Some  about  your  own  age  seemed  much  to  feel  being 
separated  from  their  friends — those  just  come  were  very  full 
hearted.  We  saw  them  all  at  supper  with  their  peach  pie 
and  milk.  They  fare  more  sumptuously  in  diet  than  the 
children  at  Ackworth ;  but  the  boys  look  rougher,  though  a 
fine  intelligent  set.  We  were  at  their  reading  in  the  evening, 
and  it  was  pleasant  to  us  to  be  among  them. 

15fh. — A  large  public  meeting  in  the  Court-house  at  Mon- 
mouth. I  felt  this  day  a  very  formidable  one ;  but  strength 
was  given  for  the  occasion,  and  the  meeting  was  one  which 
I  believe  we  may  number  amongst  our  mercies. 

ISth  — A  large  meeting  in  the  Methodist  Meeting-house 
at  Trenton.  This  was  a  most  comforting  and  seasonable  con- 
firmation of  oui'  faith,  for  it  seemed  to  soften  the  hearts  of 
the  people  towards  us,  and  was  a  delightful  refreshment  to  a 
burdened  and  heavy-laden  mind.  The  state  of  society  is 
indeed  very  interesting  in  this  land.  The  Hicksites  increase 
in  unsettlement,  and  the  diversity  of  those  lines  that  lead 
from  the  Truth  is  being  marked  more  and  more  among  them  ; 
whilst  I  believe  that  under  the  diversified  mass  which  remains 
in  our  church  there  is  an  increasing  diligence  in  seeking, 
and  willingness  to  be  gathered  to  Him  who  yet,  in  his  mercy, 
does  from  time  to  time  very  evidently  manifest  Himself  to 
be  Head. 

New  York,  2\st. — I  have  felt  remarkably  peaceful  since 
coming  into  this  city.  Our  old  friends  have  met  us  heartily. 
I  thought  the  covering  over  the  Select  Meeting  in  the  morning 
was  precious ;  and  in  the  afternoon  I  felt  satisfied  in  en- 
deavouring to  do  my  duty,  but  it  was  a  painful  duty  to  me. 
Fi'iends  have  seen  what  the  too  lenient  exercise  of  the  discipline 
has  led  into ;  and  now  I  fear  there  may  be  too  mucb  activity 
and  severity,  and  too  little  consideration  for  the  weakness  of 
human  nature.    I  had  the  comfort  of  having  dear  old  Esther 


yET.  44]  ■     1831.  101 

Griffin  by  my  side.  Slic  is  a  precious  friend  to  the  church 
and  to  us. 

23/y/. — Went  to  a  Friends'  Bible  meeting :  it  was  pleasant 
to  see  the  interest  excited. 

24th. — Queries  answered,  and  many  remarks  much  to  the 
point ;  but  I  was  not  altogether  satisfied  with  the  part  I  took. 
It  is  difficult  to  steer  clear  of  building  up  the  old  people  in 
their  austerities  on  the  one  hand,  and  on  the  other  of  giving 
the  least  latitude  to  the  young  ones  in  their  vanities,  in 
which  they  sufficiently  abound.  A  sweet  hour  or  two  in  the 
evening  with  Clarissa  Griffin,  one  of  those  remarkably  bright 
spots  in  life  which  confirm  the  weary  soul  in  the  promises  of 
the  gospel.  There  is  a  heaven ;  there  is  the  communion  of 
the  blessed.  There  aj-e  joys  unspeakable,  for  they  may  be 
tasted  on  earth. 

27th. — This  afternoon  ended  the  Yearly  Meeting.  We 
spent  a  comfortable  evening  among  nice  Friends,  with  whom 
there  was  the  feeling  of  being  knit  together  in  love. 

29th,  First-day. — Close  exercise  in  the  meeting,  and,  as  far 
as  regards  my  husband  and  myself,  in  silence ;  but  I  rose 
peaceful,  and  satisfied  that  I  had  been  there. 

dOth. — Although  the  weather  was  intensely  hot  (the  hottest 
weather  in  England  hardly  to  be  compared  to  it,  the  ther- 
mometer nearly  90^),*  I  enjoyed  the  ride.  At  Brunswick  we 
were  most  kindly  entertained  at  the  house  of  a  Presbyterian 
minister.  Our  meeting  was  held  in  their  meeting-house,  and 
hard  preaching  it  is  in  these  places,  there  is  so  much  looking 
to  the  preacher. 

\st  of  6(h  mo. — We  were  glad  to  arrive  at  the  hospitable 
dwelling  of  Richard  Hartshorn,  an  active  Friend,  above  eighty 
years  of  age,  who  has  borne  a  noble  testimony  to  the  truth  in 
this  part  of  the  country.  He  and  his  daughter  Sarah,  who  with 
her  family  lives  with  him,  seemed  to  me  among  the  excellent 

of  the  earth.  From  thence  to  's,  where  some  peculiarly 

trying  circumstances  had  brought  the  family  into  great 
distress.  I  thought  that  had  religious  principle  been  as  much 
the  rule  in  their  house  as  in  the  one  we  had  just  left,  they 
would  have  been  shielded  from  this  stroke.    We  had  a  very 


*  Falireuheit's  thermometer. 


102 


1S31. 


[.ET.  44. 


affecting  interview  with  the  family,  whieh  produced  many 
tears,  and  was  a  relief  to  me,  for  this  visit  had  been  much  in 
my  thoughts. 

25th. — Arrived  at  Boston.  This  town  and  Lynn  are 
very  superior  to  the  places  of  the  same  names  in  our  own 
country;  yet  the  situation  of  each  so  far  resembles  the  other 
as  to  account  for  the  names  being  given.  Part  of  the  ride 
here  has  been  very  interesting  ;  reading  in  the  New  Testa- 
ment. What  a  mine  is  the  Bible !  I  enjoy  it  much  with 
E.  Kirkbride, — her  mind  is  so  in  it. 

26th. — Lynn  meeting  in  the  morning;  large,  and  very 
satisfactory.  In  the  afternoon  went  on  to  an  appointed  one 
at  Salem,  also  large  and  remarkably  comfortable ;  so  that  for 
the  mercies  of  this  day  we  could  return  thanks. 

27th. — Meeting  with  the  Friends  at  Salem,  at  nine  in  the 
morning.  My  heart  overflowed  with  love  and  gratitude  in 
feeling  the  spirits  of  the  people — especially  of  the  youth — 
brought  near  to  that  which  is  good.  Another  large  meeting 
in  the  afternoon,  at  Boston,  one  that  I  had  dreaded.  An 
assembly  of  respectable-looking  persons,  in  a  large  house  that 
Friends  have  lately  built,  though  there  are  no  members 
of  our  Society  in  this  place.  It  was  to  me  a  laborious  time. 
One-half  of  the  town  said  to  be  Unitarians,  high,  worldly- 
minded  people. 

29th. — Spent  an  hour  or  two  with  my  dear  friend  Harriet 
Grey,*  whom  I  found  very  poorly.  The  conversation  with  her 
was  very  interesting,  and  I  hope  may  prove  some  stay  to  her 
mind. 

1*^  of  7th  mo. — My  dear  husband  and  our  host  went  on  to 
Plymouth,  to  appoint  a  public  meeting,  no  Friends  residing 
there.  It  is  the  place  where  the  Pilgrim  Fathers  landed 
when  they  made  their  escape  from  the  persecutions  which 
they  suffered  in  England.  They  had  to  endure  bitter  hard- 
ships after  they  reached  this  land.  The  rock  is  now  shown 
on  which  they  first  trod  on  American  soil ;  but  a  town  and 
wharfs  being  built  upon  it,  lessen  the  interest  which  we 
should  feel  were  it  still  in  its  original  state.  Plymouth  is  a 
considerable  and  flourishing  port.   We  had  a  very  satisfactory 

*  A  fellow  passenger  on  board  the  "Hibernia." 


^ET.  44.] 


1831. 


103 


mcetiug  in  the  Baptist  Chapel.  The  evening  being  fine,  we 
much  enjoyed  a  walk  on  the  jetty,  bringing  strongly  to  niy 
mind  the  associations  of  former  days,  when  I  delighted  so 
greatly  in  the  beauties  of  the  ocean ;  but,  without  boasting, 
I  may  say  the  depth  of  the  peace  of  my  own  mind,  how 
much  greater  !  indeed  of  late  the  joys  rather  than  the  suffer- 
ings of  the  gospel,  having  been  my  portion. 

2/26?.— Rode  on  to  New  Bedford  to  the  truly  comfortable 
abode  of  George  Rowland. 

In  reference  to  a  family  in  this  place,  for  whom  she 
had  been  much  interested,  H.  C.  Backhouse  writes  : — 

W.  R  was  on  the  wharf.  Poor  man  !    I  believe  we 

all  felt  for  him.  In  former  days  he  had  stood  as  a  prince 
among  the  Friends  here,  and  his  kindness  and  pleasant 
manners  won  the  hearts  of  the  people ;  these  were  not  all 
gone.  He  handed  us  kindly  out  of  the  carriage,  and  after 
meeting,  a  friend  came  to  me  with  a  fine  carnation,  which  he 
had  sent  for  me.  I  felt  the  attention,  for  it  brought  kindness 
into  my  heart  for  him.  Had  that  family  kept  their  first  love, 
what  might  they  not  have  been  !  But  in  the  progress  of  error 
they  have  many  of  them  fallen  into  Unitarianism,  and  made 
shipwreck  of  faith  and  a  good  conscience ;  still  I  have  little 
doubt,  although  some  of  them  have  now  bitterly  to  weep  by 
the  rivers  of  Babylon,  that  in  the  remembrance  of  Zion  they 
may  yet  partake  of  the  mercy  of  her  King. 

We  had  an  agreeable  passage  to  Nantucket,  and  spent  a 
quiet  afternoon  at  E.  Barker's. 

4:th. — Attended  a  public  meeting  appointed  by  Elisha 
Bates.*  I  think  I  never  heard  a  more  lucid  discourse  on 
redemption,  beginning  with  the  bondage  of  the  children  of 
Israel  in  Egypt  and  their  journey  through  the  wilderness,  to 
the  advent  of  our  Saviour  and  the  free  gift  of  his  Holy  Spirit; 

*  It  lias  been  thought  best,  notwithstanding  the  change  which  sub- 
sequently took  place  in  the  views  and  position  of  this  Friend,  to  retain 
some  of  the  notices  which  H.  C.  Backhouse  supplies  of  his  character 
and  services  in  the  cause  of  Truth.  A  similar  remark  may  probably  be 
ap|)licablu  to  some  other  of  the  names  which  are  to  be  found  in  this 
journal. 


104 


1831. 


[^T.  44. 


unfolding  the  necessity  and  mercy  find  glory  of  the  Christian 
dispensation  in  a  striking  manner.  Nathan  Hunt  followed, 
I  thought,  to  the  point.  My  hushand  added  some  few  and 
appropriate  words,  and  it  would  have  heen  well  for  myself 
had  I  had  a  little  more  faith ;  but  fearing  to  touch  so  good  a 
meeting,  it  broke  up  without  those  expressions  of  thanks- 
giving which  I  believe  were  required,  and  which  at  least  my 
own  heart  felt  the  want  of. 

9th. — Met  our  old  friend  Joseph  Hoag,  who  gave  us  a  re- 
markably interesting  account  of  the  separation  in  his  Monthly 
Meeting;  how  the  children  consulted  among  themselves  which 
side  to  take,  and  wisely  determined  that  they  would  watch 
the  behaviour  of  both  parties,  and  whichever  side  behaved 
the  best,  i/iat  they  would  take.  The  result  was,  that  all 
except  two  left  the  meeting  with  the  orthodox  party,  Joseph 
Hoag  at  their  head.  His  children  are  all  ministers.  Return- 
ing home,  I  was  unexpectedly  regaled  by  a  packet  of  letters. 
I  enjoy  thinking  of  dear  Emma  and  her  baby,  her  domestic 
happiness  interrupted  by  no  American  journey, — not  that  I 
complain  of  my  allotment.  I  may  indeed  well  be  thankful 
for  the  very  many,  both  spiritual  and  temporal  enjoyments 
that  are  my  portion,  so  that  there  are  moments  when  I  can 
feel  my  cup  runs  over. 

10th,  First-day. — Three  meetings ;  first,  with  Friends  in 
the  morning,  at  the  North  Meeting  y  in  the  afternoon,  at  the 
South  Meeting  ;  and  a  public  one  afterwards.  It  was  a  day 
of  favour  to  be  remembered. 

11th. — A  meeting  with  the  coloured  people,  who  live  very 
much  by  themselves  in  one  part  of  the  town,  and  it  proved  a 
comfortable  opportunity. 

After  visiting  several  of  the  meetings  and  families  on 
the  island  of  Nantucket,  J.  and  H.  C.  Backhouse  returned 
to  New  York,  and  from  thence  to  Philadelphia. 

22nd.— When  we  left  Newport  the  weather  was  delightful, 
the  sea  calm,  and  with  our  agreeable  company,  and  in  an 
excellent  steam-vessel,  the  time  passed  pleasantly.  I  was 
enjoying  a  walk  on  the  deck,  admiring  the  fine  moonlight 
scene,  when  one  of  the  ladies  sent  a  request  to  me  to  address 


-KT.  44.] 


1831. 


105 


them.  It  did  not  seem  right  to  say  "  No "  at  once,  for 
various  are  the  ways  in  whieh  our  duties  open  upon  us  j  so  I 
replied  that  I  would  consider  it.  In  the  meantime  my 
husband  gave  them  some  explauation  of  our  views  of  ministry. 
I  then  told  them  that  if  they  liked  to  assemble  in  the  ladies' 
cabin  before  we  retired  to  rest,  I  could  have  no  objection 
to  read  a  chapter  in  the  Bible,  which  I  did  to  perhaps  a  dozen 
ladies,  and  I  trust  it  helped  to  gather  our  spirits  to  the  Source 
of  all  good. 

23rd. — A  pleasant  ride  to  David  Clarke's  at  Stony  Brook, 
where  a  good  night's  rest  was  very  refreshing. 

24//«. — The  meeting  at  Stony  Brook  was  small,  but  I  rose 
from  it  refreshed,  and  my  faith  renewed  that  our  path  of  duty 
lay  in  the  way  we  were  taking.  After  dinner,  on  a  beautiful 
afternoon,  we  drove  twenty  miles  on  our  way  towards 
Philadelphia. 

25ih. — Reached  Philadelphia  in  time  for  the  Conference.* 
Many  Friends  who  had  been  appointed  to  attend  it,  expressed 
themselves  very  desirous  of  our  company,  but  we  waited  until 
we  had  the  formal  invitation  of  the  committee.  Two  sittings 
held  this  day ;  a  great  deal  of  interesting  matter.  A  sub- 
committee Avas  appointed  to  draw  up  a  report. 

A  report  was  drawn  up,  which,  with  very  little  alteration, 
passed  the  Conference  unanimously  in  the  afternoon,  when 
we  had  a  deeply -interesting  sitting ;  but  it  was  agreed  to 
defer  acting  upon  the  subjects  that  had  been  discussed,  in  tlie 
hope  that  at  a  future  time  all  the  Yearly  Meetings  would  be 
united  in  the  concern.  I  cannot  but  hope  and  desire  that 
the  day  may  come  when  the  whole  Society  of  Friends  the 
world  over  may  have  one  assembly,  in  which  they  may  be 
united  in  their  representatives,  and  together  wait  upon  the 
great  Head  of  the  Church.  The  Conference  was  adjourned 
to  Seventh  month  next.  At  dinner,  afterwards,  there  were 
two  members  out  of  each  of  the  six  Yearly  Meetings  :  a  very 
harmonious  table  it  was ;  an  assemblage  of  very  striking 
characters. 

*  This  assembly  was  convened  for  the  consideration  of  the  general 
iuterests  of  tlic  Society,  and  with  a  view  to  uniformity  of  discipline 
throughout  the  different  Yearly  Meetings. 


lOG 


1831. 


[.ET.  44. 


27th. — Spent  a  deeply-interesting  day  at  George  Bacon's, 
whose  wife  (E.  Kirkbride's  sister,)  was  alarmingly  ill,  and 
there  seemed  little  ground  for  hope.  It  was  a  scene  of  great 
distress,  and  I  believe  they  were  glad  to  have  me  there. 

2Sth. — Went  to  Arch  Street  Meeting,  but  my  mind  had 
been  so  interested  in  private  scenes  and  feelings  as  to  divert 
it  from  the  public.  Attended  the  funeral  of  a  young  man 
who  had  died  very  suddenly,  and  spent  the  remainder  of  the 
evening  at  George  Bacon's,  where  the  scene  had  wonderfully 
changed ;  marks  of  returning  life  and  sense  had  appeared ; 
and  it  was  truly  affecting  to  witness  their  joy,  as  well  as  the 
grief  which  preceded  it. 

In  the  two  weeks  previous  to  their  departure  for 
Ohio,  some  of  the  neighbouring  meetings  were  visited. 

llth  of  Sth  mo. — Went  with  Mary  Hodgson  and  E.  Kirk- 
bride  to  the  Quarterly  Meeting  at  Woodbury,  and  the  very 
cordial  reception  we  met  with  was  very  cheering. 

 . — Took  Sarah  Grimke  and  her  sister  to  Wilmington. 

Visited  Samuel  Canby,  a  venerable  old  man,  now  confined  to 
his  chamber.  Having  particularly  desired  to  see  him  for 
some  time,  this  opportunity  was  a  relief  to  me. 

— — •. — A  pleasant  ride,  with  my  young  friends  to  the 
Quarterly  Meeting  at  Concord  ;  returned  to  Philadelphia, 
and  on  the  way  we  were  most  hospitably  entertained  by  John 
Thomas,  a  Friend  who  had  nobly  liberated  his  slaves. 


JET.  41.] 


1H31. 


107 


CHAPTER  VIII. 

JOURNEY  TO    OHIO  ALLEGHANY    MOUNTAINS  OHIO  YEARLY  MEETINCJ 

 INDIANA  YEARLY  MEETING  LABORIOUS  JOURNEY  AND  RE- 
LIGIOUS    SERVICES      WITHIN     ITS     LIMITS  BACKWOODS  LIFE  

INTENSE     COLD  BANKS      OF     THE     WABASH— REFLECTIONS  ON 

CLOSE    OF  1831. 

Accompanied  bj  Jane  Johnson,  a  valuable  elder, 
J.  and  H.  C.  Backhouse  now  set  out  for  Ohio. 

Baltimore,  17th. — Breakfasted  at  the  country-house  of  the 
Careys,  where  I  met  my  old  friend,  Margaret  Chcston,  It  was 
an  interesting  interview  to  me,  and  I  believe  to  her  also. 

20th. — Reached  Hagar's  Town,  the  ride  through  very 
beautiful  country.  We  saw  a  number  of  new  flowers,  birds, 
and  butterflies. 

22nd. — Continued  our  wilderness  travel  over  mountains 
covered  with  wood,  and  a  rough  turnpike  road,  on  a  very 
rainy  day,  till  darkness  overtook  us,  and  we  were  obliged  to 
stop  short  of  the  inn  we  had  hoped  to  reach.  Nor  should  we 
have  found  a  lodging  there,  had  not  a  party  of  kind  Hicksites 
ofi"ered  one  of  the  rooms  they  had  engaged. 

25th. — Set  off"  early  this  morning  for  the  Monthly  Meeting 
at  Dunning's  Creek.  There  are  a  few  Friends  here  who  have 
been  saved  in  the  separation. 

26th. — To-day  we  have  crossed  the  Alleghany  mountains. 
My  driving  powers  are  in  great  request,  and  it  requires  fixed 
attention  to  steer  clear  of  stumps  and  keep  the  carriage  from 
overturning  in  the  deep  ruts  that  the  rain  has  made ;  but  we 
are  in  no  real  danger, — all  is  so  slow-paced  that  it  cannot 
well  exist,  and  we  have  a  remarkably  good  pair  of  horses. 

27th. — Rose  early,  and  went  eighteen  miles  to  a  meeting 
at  Brownsville ;  a  beautiful  ride,  through  a  more  cleared 
country  than  we  have  yet  been  in.  It  was  refreshing  to  be 
at  a  Friends'  meeting  again.  On  the  other  side  of  the 
shutters  were  the  Hicksites.  In  the  evening,  a  public 
meeting,  which  has  been  altogether  a  comfort  to  me. 


108  1831.  [.OT.  44. 

2Sth. — Crossed  the  fine  broad  river  Monongahela,  in  a 
ferry-boat.  Hills  richly  wooded  on  each  side;  the  atmosphere 
delightfully  clear  and  bright,  refreshing  to  all  nature.  In 
the  evening  we  had  a  meeting  in  a  small  town  on  the  top  of 
the  hill,  which  turned  out  an  interesting  occasion.  Many 
pious  Methodists  were  there,  and  some  infidels,  as  I  after- 
wards understood.  It  was  dark,  and  we  had  two  miles  of 
rough  hilly  road  to  travel.  I  was  glad  to  accept  the  offer  of 
a  friend  to  take  her  horse  while  she  rode  in  our  carriage 
Guided  by  lanterns,  we  did  very  well ;  and  I  rather  enjoyed 
my  solitary  ride. 

29th. — On  our  way  to  Pike  Run,  the  carriage  broke, 
the  binding  up  of  which,  with  the  badness  of  the  roads, 
took  us  three  hours  and  a  half.  Our  meeting  was  in  the 
habitation  of  two  elderly  Friends,  ministers,  David  and 
Ruth  Graves.  I  was  comforted  and  instructed  in  being  in 
the  company  of  these  ancient  worthies.  As  the  house  was 
full,  I  took  my  repose  on  some  hay  in  the  barn,  to  the 
amusement  of  my  friends.  From  the  old  friend  Graves  we 
had  a  very  impressive  and  encouraging  address,  in  Avhich  we 
were  reminded  of  the  many  falls  of  ministers,  almost  always 
to  be  traced  to  exaltation.  I  have  been  so  much  cast  down 
of  late,  that  the  hope  that  these  feelings  might  at  least  have 
preservation  in  it  was  consoling. 

31^^. — Passed  through  a  village,  and  feeling  our  minds 
drawn  towards  the  people,  had  a  meeting  appointed  at  four 
o'clock,  which  was  remarkably  satisfactory. 

2nd  of  dth  mo. — On  this  day  in  the  last  year  we  landed 
at  New  York,  and  to-day  have  crossed  the  Ohio — an  Indian 
name  signifying  beauty — and  truly  the  banks  and  scenery  are 
beautiful  indeed  !  The  extent  and  rapidity  of  water  carriage  in 
this  magnificent  country  can  scarcely  be  imagined  by  those  who 
have  not  witnessed  it.  Now  began  our  principal  adventures. 
Two  active,  obliging  young  men,  who  were  going  in  the  same 
track,  came  to  our  assistance.  The  first  hill  we  ascended,  was 
very  steep,  about  a  mile  in  length,  and  so  deeply  mired  and 
guttered  that  I  was  left  to  drive  the  horses  up.  I  might 
have  thought  myself  in  jeopardy  of  my  life,  but  for  the 
many  able  men  about  us,  in  waiting  to  keep  both  horses  and 
carriage  up.    My  dear  liusband  rode  on  the  horse  of  one  of 


iET,  44.] 


1831. 


109 


these  young  men ;  the  night  came  on  fast  and  occasioned 
something  of  peril ;  for  hesides  other  breakages,  the  pole  of 
our  carriage  gave  way,  so  there  was  no  directing  the  wheels. 
I  kept  to  it,  like  an  old  captain  to  his  ship,  as  long  as  I  could  ; 
but  in  this  ease  there  was  no  "  letting  drive,"  for  holes  and 
mire  abounded ;  so  at  last  I  was  put  inside  with  our  other 
friends,  and  driven  by  one  of  the  young  men  who  knew  the 
road.  We  were  glad  at  length  to  find  ourselves  in  a  kind 
friend's  house,  and  finally  in  a  comfortable  bed,  in  which 
I  slept  soundly. 

Srd. — We  left  our  shattered  carriage  with  George,*  to 
follow  us,  and  reached  the  dwelling  of  our  friend  Elisha  Bates, 
at  Mount  Pleasant  :  he  lives  in  a  small  but  comfortable 
house.  The  sight  of  his  room,  with  ink,  paper,  and  books 
on  shelves — amongst  them  a  Greek  lexicon,  (a  mark  of 
intellect  and  cultivation  w  hich  we  seldom  see) — was  cheering, 
as  was  also  the  sight  of  a  nice  wood  fire.  The  Select  Meet- 
ing was  agreeable  and  refreshing.  On  our  certificates  being 
read,  a  remarkably  affectionate  and  comforting  welcome  Avas 
given  to  us.  I  was  particularly  struck  with  one  man  and  his 
speech,  and  was  pleased  afterwards  to  find  that  it  was  William 
Flanner,  whom  I  had  not  seen  in  England.  We  returned  to 
E.  Bates's  to  dinner,  and  seeing  three  such  fine  men  as 
Nathan  Hunt,  Elisha  Bates,  and  William  Flanner,  who  were 
cast  both  by  grace  and  nature  in  their  best  moulds,  was  a 
treat  that  refreshed  me,  and  which  I  was  at  that  moment 
capable  of  enjoying. 

First-day,  4th. — Attended  two  large  meetings  at  Mount 
Pleasant,  held  in  their  spacious  house,  capable  of  con- 
taining about  3,000  persons.  The  position  of  it,  on  a  hill, 
with  a  fine  commanding  view  of  very  beautiful  country,  is  a 
great  contrast  to  our  Devonshire  House.  Many  of  the  neigh- 
bouring inhabitants  came  in,  apparently  from  idle  curiosity, 
disturbing  the  meeting  by  going  in  and  out  almost  all  the 
time,  even  when  Friends  were  speaking. 

5ih. — The  Yearly  Meeting  commenced  with  a  pause  which 

*  George  Conning,  a  Friend  who  had  come  over  in  the  same  vessel, 
was  their  driver,  and  proved  an  able  and  kind  assistant  in  their  long 
and  often  tedious  journeys. 


110 


1831. 


[^ET.  44. 


I  thought  miglit  be  generally  felt ;  it  was  sweet  to  me,  and  I 
hope  I  did  not  disturb  it.  We  had  a  long  sitting,  as  there  is 
only  one  in  the  day. 

7th. — On  a  committee  at  eight  o'clock,  to  consider  the  esta- 
blishment of  a  boarding-school  for  the  chiklren  of  Friends. 
I  was  never  present  at  anything  of  the  kind  so  interesting ; 
the  liberality,  talent,  and  unanimity  displayed,  were  truly 
cheering.  The  meeting  afterwards  was  long  and  good.  A 
heart-tendering  visit  from  Nathan  Hunt.  Dear  old  man  ! 
his  heart  seems  full  of  the  peace  and  love  of  the  gospel,  and 
no  wonder  we  all  like  to  partake  of  its  influence. 

Qth. — Dined  with  some  Friends  who  had  been  among  the 
first  settlers  in  this  country,  and  dependent  for  their  meat  on 
the  deer,  bears,  and  wild  turkeys  of  the  forest,  which  then 
abounded,  but  are  now  rarely  seen.  They  look  like  people 
who  have  flourished  in  this  world,  and  have  taken  thought 
for  another  at  the  same  time,  so  that  they  are  become  among 
the  princes  of  the  land ;  people  delighting  in  the  dew  of 
Heaven,  and  in  the  fatness  of  the  earth. 

lOi'/i. — After  a  large  public  meeting  at  Wheeling,  on  the 

\2th. — We  went  on  to  Concord. 

\ZtJi. — This  day  was  one  in  which  my  soul  was  comforted, 
and  a  degree  of  rejoicing  my  refreshing  portion,  giving  new 
vigour  to  soul  and  body.  Surely  these  changes  are  beyond  our 
control !  all  teaching  us  our  helplessness,  and  that  we  cannot 
keep  ourselves ;  but  a  ray  of  sunshine  brings  a  renewal  of 
faith  that  we  are  under  the  safe  guidance  and  good  keeping  of 
the  Prince  of  Peace. 

Smithfield,  Ohio,  15tl)  of  9Ui  mo.,  18.31. 

My  Beloved  Childhen, 

J.,  A.,  H.,  A\D  E., 

How  I  should  have  enjoyed  having  you  with 
us  in  our  scramble  over  the  mountains  !— you  would  have 
borne  all  our  jolts,  and  only  been  amused  by  them.  The 
carriage  often  goes  so  much  on  one  side,  that  your  father 
leans  out  at  the  window  of  the  highest  side  to  help  to  keep 
it  from  going  over,  whilst  I  have  little  or  no  apprehension 
that  this  will  be  the  case.    From  sidelings  (as  these  high 


.ET.  44.] 


1831. 


Ill 


ridges  arc  called),  we  get  into  mud-holes  which  the  horses 
dislike  more,  looking  at  them  hesitatingly,  as  though  con- 
sidering whether  they  should  leap  over  them.  We  some- 
times sink  in  the  mire  nearly  as  far  as  the  axle-tree,  and  it 
requires  a  good  pull  to  drag  us  out.  Sometimes  large  trees 
are  laid  across  the  road,  and  then  we  have  to  take  a  turn 
into  the  wood,  to  avoid  them.  The  forests  are  beautiful,  the 
land,  or  rather  hills  uncultivated,  and  we  pass  river  after 
river.  That  part  of  the  land  which  is  cleared  is  very  fertile, 
and  the  habitations  of  men  rapidly  improving ;  but  were  I 
inclined  to  describe  them  minutely,  you  would  see  a  consider- 
able contrast  between  your  mode  of  living  and  ours  :  but 
these  are  things  that  do  not  move  me.  I  have  plenty  of 
water  to  wash  in,  and  plenty  of  wholesome  food  to  eat,  and 
if  I  have  to  keep  a  window  open  with  a  stick,  or  take  a 
comb  or  the  eyelet-hole  borer  from  my  dressing-box  to  make 
the  door  fast,  it  intrudes  not  on  my  comfort.  The  hospitality 
of  our  entertainment  is  truly  agreeable,  and  the  minds  of  the 
people  much  like  their  country,  with  fine  capabilities,  and 
ready  and  eager  for  improvement.  The  more  I  see  of  life, 
the  more  earnest  I  am  for  your  improvement  and  cultivation. 
I  have  rejoiced  at  the  many  good  accounts  of  you,  and  I 
reverently  trust  that  the  "  blessing  which  makes  truly  rich" 
has  rested  upon  you  and  will  preserve  you.  I  always  have 
believed  that,  painful  as  it  is,  this  separation  brings  you  into 
circumstances  that  will  prove  a  lasting  advantage  to  you.  I 
know  that  some  of  you  are  eager  enough  after  improvement, 
and  I  desire  that  this  eagerness  may  not,  by  too  much 
engrossing  the  mind,  in  degree  frustrate  the  end  designed. 
I  have  not  often  been  so  fond  of  reading  as  of  late.  It  is 
true  I  do  not  read  much  except  the  Bible ;  but  when  the 
mind  is  thoroughly  fixed  on  any  one  thing,  its  capacities 
increase,  and  I  question  whether  there  is  anything  it  can 
more  effectually  work  upon  to  enlarge  the  understanding 
thau  the  Holy  Scriptures. 

H.  C.  Backhouse. 

\lth. — A  pleasant  peaceful  morning  with  dear  Jane 
Johnson, — a  time  to  be  grateful  for. 

19/A. — Had  an  excellent  meeting  at  Clairsville,  which 


112 


1831. 


[.V.T.  44.. 


greatly  revived  our  spirits  and  our  faith.  The  judge  and 
many  lawyers  were  present.  Had  we  so  good  a  meeting  as 
this  every  day,  I  fear  I  should  not  have  humility  enough  to 
bear  it,  or  rather  the  danger  might  be  that  we  should  be 
tempted  to  deck  ourselves  with  the  Lord's  jewels. 

20th. — Had  a  sweet  parting  with  dear  Jane  Johnson,  who 
does  seem  to  me  to  be  one  of  the  excellent  of  the  earth. 

At  Wheeling  they  embarked  on  the  Ohio. 

21s^. — Some  kind  friends  accompanied  us  on  board  the 
steamboat.  Towards  evening  the  company  drew  together  in 
the  gentlemen's  cabin;  a  great  deal  of  interesting  conversation 
ensued  between  my  husband  and  an  intelligent  man,  a  lawyer, 
evidently  a  Unitarian.  I  was  in  some  degree  of  fear  lest 
the  promotion  of  Christian  spirit  should  be  lost  sight  of  in 
advocating  evangelical  truth. 

22nd. — Since  breakfast,  I  have  talcen  my  seat  on  the  deck 
of  the  ladies'  cabin,  with  my  writing  things  and  bible.  The 
weather  is  beautiful ;  the  fine  broad  river  and  richly-wooded 
banks,  with  the  islands  in  it  equally  wooded,  form  a  feast  for 
the  eye  every  time  I  lift  it  from  the  paper.  Many  a  time 
have  I  wished  that  my  dear  friends  at  home  could  take  a 
view  of  the  magnificent  scenery  of  this  new  and  rising 
world,  in  which  nature  seems  to  beg  of  man  to  make  free  use 
of  her,  with  the  promise  of  rewarding  him  richly  for  his  toil. 

23rd. — The  boat  stopped  some  time  at  Maysville,  a 
thriving  settlement  in  Kentucky,  one  of  the  new  States 
which  has  admitted  slavery  into  its  laws ;  and  now  the 
question  arose  whether  we  had  not  better  leave  our  boat  and 
call  the  inhabitants  together.  This  being  concluded  upon, 
Benjamin  Wright,  my  husband  and  myself,  took  leave  of  our 
companions,  who  expressed  much  regret  at  parting  with  us. 
We  had  a  large  meeting,  several  coloured  people  present. 
"  Early  candlelight  "  was  the  time  named  in  the  bills.  As 
watches  do  not  abound,  the  hour  is  thus  marked,  and  as 
clearly  as  by  naming  it.  I  believe  the  gospel  was  preached, 
and  some  ears  might  be  opened  to  hear  it ;  but  I  thought  the 
efi"ect  of  slavery  might  be  felt,  and  that  the  light  of  the 
gospel  shone  dimly  in  this  place. 


-ET.  1. 1.  I 


1881. 


118 


24tli. — At  midnight  I  was  roused  from  a  comfortable 
slumber,  and  put  on  board  a  steamer.  Finding  on  the  25th 
we  could  not  reach  Cincinnati  in  time  for  our  morning 
meeting,  a  public  reading  was  proposed  to  the  captain. 
Thirty  or  forty  persons  assembled,  and  I  think  we  had  cause 
to  be  thankful  for  it.  Being  in  these  boats  and  seeing  so 
much  of  character  in  them,  gives  but  a  sad  feeling  of  the  real 
state  of  the  minds  of  men.  How  little,  apparently,  is  the 
melting  influence  of  divine  grace  suffered  to  operate  !  How 
far  is  nominal  Christendom  from  being  Christian  ! 

26th. — A  meeting  with  Friends  of  Cincinnati  in  the 
morning,  and  a  public  one  in  the  evening,  in  a  very  large 
house,  which  was  pretty  well  filled. 

27th. — After  a  few  leave-takings  we  left  Cincinnati,  and 
had  only  proceeded  a  few  miles  before  one  of  the  springs  of 
the  carriage  completely  broke.  How  would  an  Englishman 
have  contrived  to  go  on  ?  Our  American  friend  was  at  no 
loss  whatever,  and  taking  a  rail  out  of  the  fence,  he  placed  it 
under  the  body  of  the  carriage,  and  thus  we  rode  on  with 
nearly  as  much  ease  as  when  borne  upon  the  best  tempered 
springs  of  Long  Acre.  Coming  to  a  little  village,  an  intel- 
ligent-looking smith  undertook  to  put  us  in  oixler  again,  and 
a  Friend  dwelling  near,  we  took  refuge  in  his  house.  Here  we 
determined,  partly  from  necessity,  to  remain.  There  was  a 
village  near,  and  I  thought  I  should  like  to  be  with  the 
inhabitants,  and  a  meeting  was  soon  got  up  ;  altogether,  I  did 
not  regret  the  spring  of  the  carriage  breaking.  It  does  not 
seem  that  Paul  went  to  Athens  with  any  intention  of  preaching 
the  gospel,  but  whilst  he  was  there  waiting  for  his  com- 
panions, his  spirit  was  stirred  within  him,  and  he  preached  a 
sermon  as  memorable  as  most  we  hear  of. 

2Sth. — We  went  on  to  Hamilton,  a  considerable  town  on 
the  Great  Miami  river.  It  is  surprising  to  see  what  towns 
and  villages  have  risen  up  within  a  very  few  years.  The  soil 
is  remarkably  productive  in  this  part  of  the  country ;  we  saw 
Indian  corn  not  less  than  fifteen  feet  high.  We  thought  of 
having  a  meeting  in  this  place,  but  felt  best  satisfied  to  leave 
it  and  go  on  to  Oxford,  so  named  I  suppose  from  being  the 
seat  of  a  large  seminary  or  college,  in  which  there  are  about 
200  students.     It  was  a  busy  time  in  the  town,  for  the 

I 


114 


1831. 


[.V.T.  44. 


students  had  been  examined,  and  degrees  bestowed ;  the 
inns  were  crowded,  and  I  was  sent  to  take  shelter  in  a  private 
house,  the  mayor's ;  his  wife  (I  supposed  her  to  be)  was 
sitting  with  her  elbows  on  her  knees,  and  her  pipe  in  her 
mouth.  She  bid  me  civilly  sit  down,  and  went  on  talking 
to  some  young  men  in  the  room.  Finding  that  it  was  a 
suitable  evening  for  a  meeting,  our  men  friends  were  busily 
employed  in  giving  notice,  and  I  had  some  time  for  rest : 
serious  and  suffering  moments  they  were,  as  those  often  are 
which  precede  a  public  meeting.  The  house  was  filled  before 
the  time  appointed,  and  to  sit  for  some  time  before  such  an 
expectant  multitude,  with  not  a  word  to  utter,  was  no  small 
trial  of  faith,  and  of  the  sincerity  of  my  desire  that  not  a 
word  might  be  spoken  except  as  it  was  given ;  but  we  were 
helped,  and  a  time  of  renewal  of  faith  it  was.  A  young  man, 
a  student,  walked  home  with  us ;  he  seemed  to  have  been 
pleased  with  the  meeting,  and  the  intelligence  and  animation 
of  his  countenance,  with  his  evidently  serious  disposition, 
were  very  cheering. 

29th. — Went  ten  miles  to  a  meeting  of  Friends  at  Salem, 
which,  after  some  close  work,  ended  to  the  relief  of  my  mind. 
We  are  now  evidently  getting  into  a  community  of  less 
civilization  than  in  Ohio.  The  whole  appearance  of  the 
people  bears  the  same  mark,  but  great  kind-heartedness 
beams  on  their  countenances.  Went  on  three  miles  to 
Liberty,  where  we  had  a  public  meeting,  and  I  returned 
comfortable  to  the  inn.  The  landlord  and  landlady  were  very 
civil,  and  seemed  pleased  to  show  us  hospitality  at  their  own 
table.  They  sit  with  us  at  meals ;  indeed,  every  inn-table  is 
a  public  one. 

SOth. — Drove  on  a  beautiful  frosty  morning  through  fine 
forest  trees,  with  a  rich  autumnal  hue  upon  them.  Arrived 
at  Richmond,  Indiana,  where  the  Yearly  Meeting  is  held. 
Attended  a  long  committee  on  Indian  affairs,  and  heard  some 
interesting  reports. 

1st  of  lOth  mo. — My  cold  very  indifferent,  but  went  to 
the  meeting  of  ministers  and  elders,  which  I  trust  might  be 
a  comfort  to  some,  and  was  glad  to  go  to  bed  afterwards ; 
my  husband  gone  to  a  committee,  and  I  feeling  more  forlorn 
in  a  foreign  land  than  I  have  yet  done. 


tT.  44.] 


1831. 


115 


2nd,  First-day.— Y cry  poorly,  but  managed  to  go  to  jneeting, 
— a  very  large  one,  probably  1,600  or  2,000  persons  present. 
Ill  as  I  had  been,  I  do  not  think  I  remembered  my  indis- 
position for  an  hour.  Then  came  the  afternoon  meeting — 
Was  I  to  go  or  not  ?  Well,  I  thought  I  must  go  as  long  as  1 
could ;  so  I  dressed  myself  again,  thinking  of  poor  Henry 
Martyn,  whose  zeal  I  have  so  often  condemned ;  and  ti'uly 
when  I  sat  in  the  meeting  I  did  feel  ill.  I  wrapped  mj'selt' 
in  my  cloak,  and  whilst  my  husband  was  speaking,  kept  very 
still ;  but  almost  as  soon  as  he  sat  down,  the  great  uncertainty 
of  our  lives  came  forcibly  before  me ;  and  weak  and  unwell  as 
I  was,  I  was  strengthened  to  speak  with  more  animation,  if 
not  life,  than  usual.  On  returning  home  I  was  glad  again  to 
retire  to  rest. 

Srd. — I  awoke  rather  better  :  rose,  and  just  as  I  had 
finished  dressing,  I  found  our  friend  Isaac  Bonsall,  who 
lodged  in  the  same  house,  had  been  seized  with  a  fit.  On 
opening  my  door  I  saw  him  lying  close  beside  it,  very  ill,  but 
quite  sensible  :  he  looked  pleasantly  at  me.  I  enquired  of 
him  if  he  felt  much  oppressed.  He  replied  he  wanted  to  be 
bled  ;  but  said,  "  Do  yoii  go  to  meeting  who  can  go  ;  I  Avant 
you  all  to  go  to  meeting."  These  were  the  last  words  he 
uttered.  The  doctor  was  then  come,  but  as  they  laid  him 
upon  the  bed,  he  expired.  We  could  do  no  good,  and  went 
to  meeting.  On  our  return,  we  found  that  Benjamin  Wright, 
our  kind  companion  and  friend,  had  received  a  hopeless 
account  of  his  eldest  son,  a  married  man.  This  Avas  very 
aflPecting.  I  never  saw  any  one  bear  such  intelligence 
with  more  Christian  meekness :  he  came  and  sat  by  my 
bedside  with  my  dear  husband.  I  could  not  say  much,  but 
with  this  account— a  corpse  in  the  next  room,  and  feeling 
myself  very  unwell — you  may  suppose  this  was  a  low  moment 
in  Ufe ;  yet  I  did  not  feel  so  much  cast  down  as  I  have  often 
been  on  former  occasions,  when  there  was  less  appai'eut  cause. 

4!th. — We  staid  from  the  Yearly  Meeting  to  attend  the  inter- 
ment of  Isaac  Bonsall.  This  morning,  the  meeting  for  worship 
was  very  large,  and  a  truly  solid  one  I  believe  it  was;  the  silence 
was  at  times  striking,  and  there  were  words  enough  also. 

9th. — I  ventured  to  appoint  a  public  meeting  for  the 
evening,  and  I  do  not  think  I  have  often  been  strengthened 
more  fully  to  advocate  the  truths  of  Christianity ;  so  that  I 

\2 


110  1S31.  [.+:t.  44. 

may  Immbly  acknowledge  tliat  He  whom  I  desire  to  serve 
has  manifested  himself  this  day  to  be  "  strength  in  weak- 
ness," &c. 

10//^. — 'The  Yearly  Meeting  ended  ;  I  believe  many  felt  its 
solemnity.  Friends  were  very  kind  afterwards,  and  the  good 
wishes  of  some  honest-hearted  old  Friends,  whose  hearts  had 
the  glow  of  Yearly  "Meeting  npon  them,  were  very  cheering. 
The  reading  of  the  scriptures  has  been  regularly  kept  up 
every  evening  in  our  large  company.  The  house  which  is 
small,  has  contained  forty  or  fifty  inhabitants. 

"We  are  in  this  place  among  the  nobles  of  the  land  ;  some 
of  them  truly  such  in  the  best  sense.  I  have  looked  many  a 
time  with  admiration  on  the  well-marked  lines  of  their 
exjiressive  countenances. 

12ih. — ]\[ade  a  call  on  a  sick  Friend.  My  faith  renewed  by 
hearing  afterwards  that,  though  I  knew  nothing  about  her, 
what  I  said  was  very  applicable  to  a  most  afflicted  and  ex- 
cellent person.  Then  to  meeting  at  "Whitewater.  My  head 
ached,  and  I  felt  thoroughly  low,  and  sat  for  a  long  time  in 
this  state  till  at  last  it  was  given  me  to  speak,  I  suppose,  a 
word  in  season;  for  a  Friend  came  up  afterwards  and  desired  I 
might  be  encouraged,  and  we  had  a  cordial  greeting  from  many. 

13th. — The  Friends,  at  whose  house  we  lodged— a  large 
family,  of  many  generations, — were  as  kind  as  they  coiild  be  ; 
the  old  man  saying  he  was  so  sorry  forme, that  he  should  be 
glad  to  be  ill  instead  of  me.  "\Ye  had  a  nice  leave-taking,  for 
which  they  were  truly  grateful,  and  went  on  to  Dover.  I  felt 
low  and  ill  during  the  first  part  of  the  meeting,  but  had  to 
speak  on  brotherly  love  ;  and  afterwards,  for  the  confirmation 
of  my  faith,  found  there  was  a  want  of  it  among  them.  A 
fine  drive  afterwards  through  the  woods,  whose  rich  autumnal 
foliage  was  illuminated  by  the  rays  of  the  setting  sun ;  reached 
another  habitation  of  the  same  kind, — the  house,  and  almost 
all  things  in  it,  the  handiwork  of  the  inhabitants,  and  much 
better  than  you  could  suppose.* 

*  The  following  descriptive  letter  is  from  Jonathan  Backhouse : — 
Newport,  Wayne  County,  Indiana,  loth  of  10th  mo.,  1831. 

My  Dear  Henrt, 

•    •    *    *    We  have  attended  the  Yearly  Meetings  in 
Ohio  and  Indiana,  which  are  quite  in  the  western  parts  of  the  United 


.ET.  41.]  IHol.  117 

1  bth. — At  New  Garden  Monthly  JNIceting.  A  large  number 
of  Friends  assembled,  and  it  proved  a  very  refreshing  meeting, 
though  it  lasted  six  hours. 

States,  at  least  that  portion  of  it  that  is  inhabited  by  white  people. 
We  are  now  in  Wayne  County,  Indiana,  which  possibly  thou  might  find 
on  reference  to  the  map  :  it  is  about  700  or  800  miles  west  of  New  Vork. 
These  two  states,  [Ohio  and  Indiana]  are  very  fine  and  fertile  districts, 
and  have  made  in  forty  years  wonderful  advances  in  the  comforts  and 
arts  of  civilized  life.    A  great  part  of  Ohio  within  thirty  years  was  a 
wilderness,  and  now  towns  and  cities  and  villages  are  to  be  found  in 
various  parts  of  it.    Cincinnati  contains  30,000  inhabitants,  and  on  the 
river  Ohio  are  several  hundred  steamboats,  almost  in  constant  operation, 
chiefly  from  Pitsburgh  to  Cincinnati  and  New  Orleans  on  the  Mis- 
sissippi.  We  came  350  miles,  and  might  have  gone  by  steam-navigation 
1,500  miles  further,  so  wonderful  is  the  extent  of  the  rivers  on  this  Con- 
tinent; beautiful  in  general  they  are,  the  banks  well  covered  with  timber, 
and  on  some  of  them  great  variety  of  beautiful  shrubs.  Where  we  now 
are  is  amidst  the  more  recent  settlements,  where  a  few  fields  are  cleared 
of  the  trees — a  small  house,  built  with  the  logs,  not  abounding  with 
the  comforts  of  life.    The  whole  family,  though  consisting  of  ten  or 
twelve  persons,  all  sleep  in  one  room.    We  generally  separate  our  bed, 
and  make  a  little  apartment  for  ourselves  by  susiiendiug  a  pair  of 
sheets  at  a  little  distance  from  the  bed.    Indian  corn  is  grown  in  great 
abundance,  and  wild  fowl,  turkeys,  pigeons,  and  ducks  are  very  plentiful. 
Where  we  lodged  last  night,  a  young  man  went  into  the  woods  and 
brought  a  wild  turkey.    Deer,  which  were  also  plentiful,  have  now 
become  scarce  ;  people  are  settling  it  so  rapidly  that  the  game  is  very 
much  driven  away.    Wild  pigeons  were  so  numerous  a  few  years  ago 
that  a  friend  told  me  they  occupied  a  space  of  ten  miles  wide  and 
seventy  long  with  their  nests,  and  every  tree  would  have  from  fifty  to 
one  hundred  nests.    When  on  the  wing  during  the  day,  they  darkened 
the  air  so  that  if  he  was  I'eading  he  was  obliged  to  lay  aside  his  book. 
The  log  houses  are  some  of  them  very  cold, — broken  windows,  open 
doors,  wide  crevices  between  the  logs,  where  the  wind  and  cold 
penetrate  and  make  it  very  much  like  sleeping  in  the  open  air  ;  but 
many  are  comfortable  ;  our  lodging  to-night  is  in  a  warm  tight  house, — 
agreeable  orderly  Friends,  and  all  things  comfortable  about  us,  though 
on  a  small  scale.    The  kitchen  is  also  the  dining-room,  and  the  loom 
occupies  an  important  part  in  it.    Here  people  are  really  clever  and 
ingenious  ;  they  grow  the  wool,  spin,  dye,  weave  the  cloth,  and  make 
their  clothes.    Some  of  them  ai'e  very  well  made,  others  moderately  so ; 
but  they  have  little  occasion  for  money,  as  the  farm  produces  all  they 
want  for  food.    The  juice  of  the  maple  yields  them  sugar  in  plenty. 
They  make  their  own  soap  from  the  wood  ashes,  and  candles  too  from 
tallow  or  wax,  but  they  are  of  course  very  inferior  to  what  we  see  in 


1H31. 


[.KT.  4i. 


I6th. — My  liusbaud  went  to  a  meeting  some  miles  in  the 
woods,  and  I  remained  at  New  Garden.  Here  I  had  no  great 
deal  to  say  ;  but  my  mother  and  children,  my  brothers  and 
sisters  and  tlieir  children,  came  so  closely  before  me  that 
although  no  one  present  knew  anything  about  them,  I  ventured 
publicly  to  put  up  my  petition  for  them.  Many  came  to  me 
with  tears  afterwards,  and  the  hearts  of  the  people  did  truly 
seem  turned  towards  us. 

17th. — Lodged  at  a  house  in  which  there  was  no  spare  bed- 
room ;  but  by  hanging  up  our  sheets,  we  made  a  comfortable 
private  apartment. 

18/^. — Went  on  to  Center.  It  was  a  trying  time  to 
myself.  Perhaps  it  might  be  a  baptism  to  prepare  me  to  feel 
for  some  there ;  for  a  Friend  came  to  me  aftervvards  and  said 
he  was  thankful  I  liad  been  sent  into  this  country. 

19th. — I  mounted  a  horse  and  rode  four  miles  through  the 
noble  forest,  on  a  fine  sunshiny  morning,  to  Arba  Monthly 
Meeting,  which  proved  a  time  of  renewal  of  faith ;  the  poor 
Friends  did  so  gladly  receive  us  that  it  was  very  cheering, 
and  they  conducted  us  afterwards  to  a  remarkably  comfort- 

Eiiglaud  ;  yet  I  aiu  amused  at  tlieir  readiness.  We  liad  a  public 
meeting  at  early  caudleliglit,  and  candles  were  even  to  make  when  the 
time  of  meeting  was  near  at  hand  ;  but  they  speedily  melted  some 
tallow  and  had  the  candles  ready  for  us.  The  travelling  is  very  diffi- 
cult ;  the  roads  are  bad  beyond  description,  much  of  them  through  the 
woods,  and  so  often  trees  which  have  blown  down  have  fallen  across 
the  road,  that  we  have  to  turn  out  into  almost  untrodden  paths,  through 
the  bushes,  aud  often  deep  in  the  mire,  that  it  is  not  only  slow  and 
tedious  (not  exceeding  2  or  2h  miles  an  hour),  but  very  fatiguing.  We 
are  both  well ;  thy  dear  mother  has  recovered  from  the  effects  of  a  severe 
cold  which  she  had  a  few  weeks  ago,  but  we  are  longing  to  hear  from 
you.  Our  love  to  "  Uncle  and  Aunt  Barclay  "  particularly,  aud  to  their 
dear  children.  My  nephew,  Robert,  would  be  amused  with  the  natural 
history  of  this  country,  many  parts  of  which  are  very  beautiful  ;  but  I 
miss  the  silence  and  calmness  of  our  evenings  and  nights.  Here  the 
noise  is  perpetual,  aud  the  croaking  of  frogs,  the  locusts  called  "  Katy 
did  it,"  from  a  constant  reiteration  of  a  soimd  resembling  these  words, 
and  of  a  bird  called  "  Whip-poor-Will,"  from  the  same  resemblance. 
The  variety  of  trees  is  very  great — forty  different  species  or  varieties 
of  oak.  The  colouring  of  some  of  them  is  beautiful  at  this  season — a 
deep  crimson  ;  and  some  of  the  trees  of  the  foi'cst  very  large,  as  much  as 
twenty-five  feet  in  circumference,  and  in  general  from  100  to  120  feet 
high.    *    *    *  * 


44..] 


1831. 


119 


able  dwelling,  where  we  were  introduced  into  a  small  air-tight 
room  (a  real  privilege),  with  two  clean  comfortable  beds,  and 
an  excellent  fire.  Upon  one  of  them  I  remained  profoundly 
still  for  an  hour  or  two,  when  I  thought  I  must  rouse  myself, 
and  a  lovely  little  infant  being  of  the  party,  I  got  its  fat  little 
face  to  play  with.  It  was  warmly  and  sensibly  clothed,  and 
very  clean ;  so  that  we  perceive  as  much  difference  in  indi- 
vidual character  among  the  inhabitants  of  this  wilderness,  as 
among  those  of  the  civilized  parts  of  the  earth.  Good  sense 
and  good  principle  have  a  marked  influence  everywhere. 

20th. — Parted  with  our  kind  and  helpful  friends  John  and 
M.  Negus,*  and  proceeded  on  our  way  to  Jericho.  Coming  to 
Norwich,  a  small  settlement  of  Friends,  I  was  not  easy  to  pass 
it ;  so  we  stopped  and  had  an  interesting  little  meeting  in 
the  woods,  to  the  comfort  of  the  people  and  ourselves.  We 
were  welcomed  into  our  lodging-place,  by  a  poor  woman 
lying  in  bed  in  one  corner  of  the  only  room  they  had, 
except  a  kitchen  and  an  outhouse  for  the  loom.  The  spot  did 
look  forlorn  ;  but  the  woman's  kind  welcome  and  expression 
that  she  hoped  we  should  not  pass  them  by,  cheered  us.  We 
accepted  the  bed  in  the  opposite  corner,  which  had  clean 
sheets  for  strangers,  and  by  opening  out  the  carriage  cushions, 
each  of  which  contains  a  pillow,  sheet,  and  blanket,  putting 
the  blanket  against  the  wall  to  keep  out  the  air  from  the 
many  holes  in  it,  and  hanging  the  sheet  upon  the  joist,  we 
contrived  to  make  a  separate  apartment,  and  slept  com- 
fortably. This  is  backwoods  life — an  introduction  into  a  very 
new  world  to  me,  and  one  which  I  trust  I  may  not  have  long 
to  continue  in,  but  which  I  am  not  sorry  that  I  am  seeing. 
We  have  plenty  to  eat ;  though  a  succession  of  chickens, 
which  are  running  about  one  half-hour,  and  in  the  pot  the 
next,  is  not  the  most  tender  and  dainty  of  food.  The  bread 
is  generally  very  good,  and  we  have  plenty  of  good  apples, 
cooked  in  many  forms. 

21*^. — The  road  very  bad,  from  the  depth  and  frequency 
of  the  mud-holes.  Our  kind  and  excellent  guide  George 
Shugart  lent  me  his  horse  for  some  miles — a  trial  of  my 

*  Marian  Negus  had  very  kiudly  cared  for  H.  C.  Backhouse 
during  the  time  they  had  been  together,  nursing  her  when  she  was 
ill,  &c.  &c. 


1831. 


[.fiT.  44. 


horsemiiTisliip  to  keep  the  balance  on  a  man's  saddle ;  how- 
ever I  succeeded  admirably,  and  in  thus  riding  through 
the  Avoods,  and  feeling  the  benefit  of  the  accomplishment 
obtained  in  early  life,  the  past  might  in  part  bury  the 
present.  I  cannot  but  admire  these  magnificent  forests, 
the  hollow  bark  and  yell  of  the  dogs  resounding  through 
them.  We  went  on  six  miles  to  an  evening  meeting  in  the 
county  town,  Winchester,  which,  weary  as  we  were,  was 
satisfactory.  We  lodged  in  a  comfortable  inn,  where  we  had 
a  room  to  ourselves,  a  luxury  you  cannot  fully  appreciate ; 
but  sleep  sometimes  comes  in  the  poorest  better  than  in  the 
most  indulgent  habitations. 

22nd. — Rode  two  miles  on  horseback,  to  White  River 
Meeting,  where  things  seem  in  a  low  state.  A  fine  tender- 
hearted man  spoke  very  encouragingly  to  us  afterwards. 
Truth  gives  an  expression  to  the  countenance  which  in  its 
lustre  cannot  be  mistaken.  There  is  salt  yet  on  the  earth, 
and  it  is  not  wanting  in  this  wilderness. 

24lh. — A  long  ride  through  the  mud  and  wood  to  Ilard- 
shaw  INIeeting.  I  sat  by  an  interesting  young  woman,  with 
a  child  on  her  lap,  and  felt  great  sympathy  for  her.  Found 
she  was  an  acceptable  minister,  imder  the  trying  circum- 
stances of  great  poverty,  a  helpless  husband,  and  many  little 
children. 

27i/i.^Speut  this  day  at  Charles  Osborn's.  We  had  had 
many  days  of  ha]  d  travelling,  and  our  things  wanted  repair ; 
so  I  sat  down  to  mend  my  shoes  and  habit,  and  put  some 
other  things  in  order.  Here  we  were  feasted  on  wild  turkey 
and  venison,  both  plentiful  in  this  neighbourhood, — a  sure 
symptom  of  being  far  in  the  wilderness. 

28//;. — Another  meeting  at  Springfield,  which  was  interest- 
ing and  relieving.  Drove  eight  miles  afterwards  through  the 
woods  to  a  house  which  exceeded  anything  we  have  yet  met 
with.  It  was  really  appalling  ;  there  was  apparently  neither 
door  nor  window,  and  hardly  a  chair  to  sit  upon  :  the  inhabit- 
ants in  as  low  a  state  as  the  house.  I  began  to  write 
for  my  solace.  But  "  watch  and  pray,  and  tliat  continually:" 
1  ought  to  have  been  attentive  to  the  people  of  the  house, 
and  not  self-indulgent. 

We  are  quite  a  sight  in  thes:C  places.    The  children  come 


.*;t.  44.] 


1831. 


about  us  for  the  most  minute  inspection,  and  are  surprised  to 
see  me  write  as  fast  as  I  do.  jNIv  fur  cloak  is  under  constant 
observation,  and  they  seem  pleased  to  find  that  it  is  the 
fur  of  their  own  squirrels,  which  are  so  abundant  in  these 
Moods  that  they  are  killed  in  numbers  for  destroying  the 
corn. 

The  Meeting-house  in  the  wood  was  well  filled,  and  I  believe 
it  was  a  good  meeting  ;  so  that  although  our  life  is  unusually 
trying,  yet  fi'om  meeting  to  meeting  we  are  so  helped  that 
we  cannot  question  that  we  are  in  our  right  places.* 

3rd  of  llih  mo. — A  few  miles  from  Greenfield  we  came 
into  the  State  road,  which  was  so  bad  that  the  carriage  broke 
twice,  and  was  brought  to  the  town  by  oxen,  whilst  I  rode 
thither  on  hoi'seback. 

5th,  First-day. — I  tried  to  be  agreeable  to  the  kind  friends 
about  us.  The  mother  of  our  host  is  a  woman  of  affliction, 
and  of  a  cheerful  countenance,  bespeaking  the  renovating 
influence  of  the  life  of  true  devotion.  Her  company  was  a 
comfort  to  me,  and  she  gave  me  a  very  sweet  kiss  and  a 
blessing  on  parting  the  next  morning.  I  had  also  had  a 
refreshing  rest,  endeavouring  to  cast  my  care  on  Him  who 
careth  for  us. 

6th. — Again  attended  Duck  Creek  Meeting.  Notice  had 
this  time  been  w"ell  given,  and  it  renewed  our  faith  that  we 
were  not  forsaken,  but  were,  with  all  oxir  doubts  and  fears,  in 
the  line  of  Divine  appointment.  I  then  took  my  horse  (for 
my  husband  has  bought  one  for  me),  and  we  rode  seven 
miles  to  a  town  where  we  had  a  public  meeting,  also  a 
time  of  favour.  "We  lodged  at  a  Friend's  house  near,  but 
had  to  come  through  the  woods  by  the  light  of  a  pine  knot. 

*  About  the  same  time  H.  C.  Backhouse  writes  : — 

I  fear  you  may  thiuk  my  journals  of  late  have  been  very  ga-umbliug, 
but  I  am  in  hopes  Vjrighter  times  may  come.  However,  we  have  been 
getting  on  with  our  work,  which  should  be  our  main  desire,  and  I  believe 
to  the  satisfaction  of  our  friends,  which  is  no  small  favour  ;  and  if  there 
were  not  internal  ballast,  we  might  be  more  in  danger  than  I  trust  we 
are  ;  but  never  was  I  more  fully  brought  to  the  persuasion,  "  that  in 
me,  that  is  in  my  flesh,  dwelleth  no  good  tiling."  My  dear  husband, 
who  keeps  a  much  more  even  tenor  of  mind,  thinks  I  look  too  gloomily  on 
myself.  He  smiles  at  me,  and  says,  "  It  is  well  to  talk  about  martyrdom  ; 
but  thou  seest  how  poorly  thoubearest  it  when  it  comes  home  to  thee  !" 


122 


1831. 


[Jix.  44. 


I  learned  the  other  day  that  by  wrapping  a  piece  of  rag  round 
a  tallow  candle,  a  torch  is  made  that  is  not  easily  blo^yn  out ; 
in  short,  there  is  no  inconvenience  for  which  these  people 
have  not  a  remedy  at  hand,  so  that  life  is  a  continual  employ- 
ment of  their  inventive  faculties. 

7ih. — I  again  mounted  my  steed,  and  rode  six  miles  before 
ten  o'clock ;  the  roads  hardly  fit  for  a  carriage  to  be  drawn 
over ;  our  hearts  so  heavy  that  we  thought  it  better  to  pause 
befox-e  pursuing  our  course.  It  may  be  that  the  wdll  may  be 
accepted  for  the  deed.  But  the  further  we  go  westward  the 
more  prepared  the  people  seem  to  receive  our  ministry.  I 
am  often  inexpressibly  depressed,  yet  now  and  then  there  is  a 
bright  gleam — so  it  was  yesterday — in  which  nothing  seemed 
impossible,  and  my  heart  abounded  in  a  joy  with  which  the 
stranger  cannot  intermeddle.  There  have  been  moments 
in  our  log  cabins  which  amply  compensate  for  many  hours  of 
suffering,  and  are  I  believe,  but  glimpses  of  that  day  which, 
if  faith  and  patience  hold  out  to  the  end,  shall  shine  with 
unclouded  brightness,  where  there  is  no  more  separation  from 
those  Ave  most  dearly  love,  no  more  fears  for  their  welfare,  no 
more  temptation,  doubt,  or  conflict ;  but  where  joy,  and  love, 
and  peace,  in  holy  communion  with  the  blessed,  shall  be  our 
everlasting  portion. 

Avery  agreeable  company  of  Friends  assembled  this  even- 
ing, in  which  there  were,  I  believe,  feelings  of  true  Christian 
fellowship. 

11th. — By  hard  travelling  reached  Indianapolis,  where  we 
had  a  public  meeting,  largely  attended.  Indianapolis  is  a 
flourishing  town,  only  ten  years  since  in  possession  of  the 
Indians.  This  rapid  improvement  gives  a  decided  cast  to  the 
character  of  the  people,  who  are  ready  to  seize  upon  every 
new  thing. 

White-lick,  17th  of  11th  mo.,  1831. 

My  Beloved  Children, 

I  was  glad  to  hear  of  the  interest  you  take  in  your 
pursuits,  and  the  many  opportunities  you  have  for  improve- 
ment. I  could  almost  wish  I  had  not  been  so  earnest  to  learn 
much,  that  what  I  did  learn  might  have  been  more  accurately 
impressed  on  my  mind  ;  for  want  of  it,  I  cannot  have  that  sort 


/V,T.  -14.] 


1831. 


123 


of  coufidence  which  would  now  be  a  very  great  help  to  me. 
How  much  do  I  desire  that  you  may  be  makiug  good  use  of  the 
present  most  valuable  time  !  Mauy  are  the  stripes  we  receive 
in  after  life,  for  hours  sauntered  away  or  misspent  in  youth, 
the  mind  acquires  a  bent  tlien,  that  it  never  wholly  loses ;  if 
we  are  early  accustomed  to  apply  vigorously  to  what  we  are 
about,  we  gain  a  habit  of  attention  which  saves  us  from  those 
wanderings  of  the  imagination,  in  which  many  bitter  sorrows, 
as  well  as  great  evils,  have  their  origin  and  food.  It  Avould 
be  a  comfort  to  me  indeed,  to  hear  that  dear  Harry  was 
thoroughly  attentive  to  his  lessons,  when  he  was  about  them, 
and  then  let  him  play  as  heartily  as  he  will  afterwards.  I 
know  this  giving  the  whole  mind  to  the  object  which  we 
think  it  right  to  be  engaged  in,  is  more  difficult  to  some 
than  to  others ;  and  I  know  too,  that  it  requires  an  effort  to 
keep  the  mind  for  any  length  of  time  to  one  point ;  but  the 
more  he  tries  to  do  so,  the  easier  it  will  become.  I  have  no 
more  taste  for  labour  than  he  has,  but  I  am  sure  I  can  obtain 
no  comfortable  rest  without  it.  A  word  to  the  wise  is  suffi- 
cient. I  was  glad  to  hear  of  his  garden  being  flourishing, 
and  that  he  had  so  much  pleasure  in  it. 

Dear  little  Edmund  !  I  am  glad  he  has  "  a  kite  as  high 
as  his  chin."  I  should  like  to  help  him  to  fly  it.  I  remem- 
ber having  a  kite  that  I  was  very  fond  of  flying,  and  could 
hardly  hold  the  string  in  a  high  wind.  I  like  to  hear  of  his 
reading  to  dear  grandmamma. 

I  wish  I  could  give  you  an  animated  description  of  the 
country,  and  the  scenes  through  which  we  pass;  but  to  do  them 
justice  I  must  put  them  down  in  a  pocket-book  as  in  a  sketch- 
book ;  for  though  at  the  time  I  think,  what  a  good  thing  this 
would  be  to  tell  the  children,  yet  like  scenes  in  nature, 
strong  as  the  impression  is  at  the  moment,  I  cannot  recall  acts 
and  expressions  that  have  amused  me.  Hats  are  very  useful 
in  this  country ;  they  serve  for  stopping  windows,  blowing 
fires,  and  dusting  the  hearth,  as  well  as  being  in  spare  time  a 
covering  for  the  head  out-doors  and  in-doors.  The  roads  are 
beyond  anything  you  can  suppose.  We  go  down  into  holes, 
the  shake  of  which  is  so  great  tliat  I  rise  from  my  seat,  and 
placing  my  back  against  the  carriage,  and  my  feet  on  mv 


124 


1831. 


I'ET.  11. 


dressing  box,  can  endure  almost  anything ;  then  sometimes, 
to  adjust  the  balance,  \vc  have  to  move  from  one  side  of  the 
carriage  to  the  other.  We  can  seldom  have  the  glasses  up, 
lest  they  should  be  broken  by  the  branches  of  the  trees,  as 
most  of  our  way  is  through  the  foi'est.  Rattlesnakes  are 
found  here,  but  they  seldom  do  any  injury,  always  giving 
warning  by  the  rattle  before  they  bite.  A  Friend  told  me  he 
met  with  one  while  ploughing,  which  frightened  the  horses 
so  that  they  ran  away  ;  but  he  soon  killed  it.  I  saw  the  skin 
of  one  about  five  feet  long ;  I  think  the  same  Friend  had 
found  a  nest  of  thirteen. 

At  the  Quarterly  Meeting,  there  was  a  paper  sent  in  from 
an  absent  representative,  "  The  reason  I  do  not  attend  is  for 
lack  of  a  suitable  beast  to  ride  on ;'"  from  another,  "  Could 
not  get  a  suitable  creature  ;"  from  another,  "  Could  not  con- 
trive to  bring  my  babe  on  the  creature."  Horses  are  gene- 
rally called  creahires  ;  in  Ireland  the  populace  go  by  that 
name.  A  horse  tied  up  is  called  "  hitched  up they  are 
hitched  up  in  numbers  about  the  meeting-houses,  which  are 
in  the  midst  of  the  wood.  "  Gear"d  up"  is  harnessed.  But  in 
general  there  is  much  less  peculiarity  of  expression  than 
among  the  uneducated  part  of  our  [English]  community. 
We  have  now  three  horses.  Our  guide,  who  has  been  long 
accustomed  to  drive  a  waggon,  drives  our  carriage  in  waggon 
style,  riding  upon  the  wheel  horse,  and  with  aline — literally  a 
rope  attached  to  our  third  horse — contrives  to  get  through 
mud-holes,  sideling  places  and  stumps,  in  a  manner  that 
would  surprise  you. 

Oh  these  sylvan  scenes  !  They  bring  to  my  mind  the  old 
chivalroias  times  when  Europe  was  almost  a  forest ;  when 
knight  and  damsel,  on  prancing  palfrey  borne,  wandered  in 
quest  of  adventure.  It  is  one  thing  to  hear  of  it,  and  another 
to  see  what  woodland  life  is.  It  is  no  pleasant  thing,  I  can 
assure  you,  to  be  lost  in  a  forest ;  though  the  forests  of 
America  are  exempt  from  thieves  and  robbers,  and  very 
much  so  from  wild  beasts.  Some  wolves  however,  and  bears, 
and  I  believe  the  panther,  yet  remain.  Racoons  abound, 
and  are  killed  for  their  valuable  skins.  I  do  think  I  shall 
indeed  prize  the  civilized  part  of  the  earth,  when  I  may  be 


.i;t.  44.] 


1881. 


125 


gladdened  with  a  sight  of  it  again  ;  bnt  I  believe  I  shall 
never  regret  seeing  the  contrast  to  it  which  I  have  seen  of 
late.  We  are  in  excellent  health,  which,  considering  the 
exposures  we  a7'e  subject  to,  is  almost  surprising.  The  cold 
is  now  intense;  it  has  been  with  some  difficulty  that  I  have 
dressed.  This  is  the  most  suffering  part  of  the  day,  as  when 
oru  clothes  are  on,  the  cold  does  not  easily  penetrate ;  but 
to  dress  in  an  atmosphere  near  zero  is  not  very  pleasant. 

Your  truly  affectionate  mother, 

H.  C.  Backhouse. 

I9th. — Attended  the  meeting  for  Ministers  and  Elders  of 
White -lick  Quarterly  Meeting,  in  which  1.  believe  I  wept  like  a 
child,  and  Ijegged  for  help.  The  covering  over  the  meeting  was, 
I  thought,  sweet ;  at  least  my  mind  was  more  staid  than  for 
some  time  past.  A  sense  of  help  from  the  sanctuary,  in  which 
I  was  ready  to  believe  we  must  persevere  through  all  the 
difficulties  of  the  roads,  and  the  pain  of  distance  and  absence, 
to  visit  the  remote  meetings  of  this  Quarterly  Meeting.  In 
the  evening  we  had  a  public  meeting  at  Moorsville,  a  small 
town  near,  in  which  I  spoke  with  considerable  ease  to  myself, 
and  felt  peaceful  afterwards.  Lodged  in  the  town,  at  the 
house  of  some  Friends,  who  seemed  much  pleased  to  entertain 
us.  Though  a  gleam  of  light  had  shone  over  the  day,  I  do  not 
think  I  slept  at  all  in  the  night,  and  had  some  difficulty  in 
keeping  myself  warm,  there  being  many  avenues  to  the  ex- 
ternal air ;  howevei",  after  breakfast,  I  felt  revived.  George, 
who  is  most  pleasantly  attentive  and  really  seems  to  feel  for 
me,  brought  the  carriage,  and  I  returned  to  our  old  lodgings, 
where  I  dressed  myself  a  little  neatly.  I  seldom  see  myself 
in  a  glass,  and  never  was  there  less  occasion  for  it. 

The  Quarterly  Meeting  was  held  to  pretty  good  satisfaction, 
and  Friends  were  veiy  kind  and  affectionate.  W^e  crossed 
the  river  in  a  canoe  (the  ford  being  too  deep,)  made  out  of 
one  large  tree :  spent  a  pleasant  evening.  I  was  glad  to 
have  my  heart  opened  a  little  to  the  social  enjoyment  of 
Friends'  company. 

2\st. — After  being  kindly  welcomed  by  our  friends  [Joel 
Dixon's  family]  we  went  to  the  adjournment  of  the  Quarterly 
Meeting,  beginning  with  a  meeting  for  worship,  which  was 


1831. 


[.v/v.  44-. 


refreshing;  very  fer\ent  were  my  petitions  for  preservation. 
In  the  meeting  for  discipline  we  had  a  remarkably  nice 
visit  from  Jesse  Arnott.  Spent  a  pleasant  evening;  Friends 
much  interested  about  our  going  forward,  and  manifesting 
a  really  tender  concern  for  our  encountering  the  difficulties 
of  their  country.  Their  kindness  on  the  breaking  up  of  the 
Quarterly  fleeting  was  quite  striking,  making  me  feel  most 
unworthy  of  it. 

22nd. — We  proceeded  five  miles,  through  miserable  roads  ; 
however,  I  had  a  peaceful  pleasant  ride,  and  spent  the  evening 
in  a  sunshine  of  mind  that  Avas  truly  refreshing  The  night 
was  frosty,  and  the  house  very  open ;  but  throwing  my  shawl 
over  my  head,  I  was  not  in  immediate  contact  with  the  air. 

2Zrd. — A  meeting  at  Sugar  Grove — one  of  those  to  be 
remembered  with  gratitude.  The  Friends,  with  tears  in  their 
eyesj  desired  our  preservation,  the  difficulties  of  the  road 
before  us  especially  exciting  their  interest.  Here  we  parted 
Avith  our  truly  kind  friends,  the  Dixons.  Ten  miles  through 
a  very  difficult  road  brought  us  to  Mill  Creek,  and  my  soul 
this  day  enjoyed  remarkable  rest  and  peace.  ^Yere  it  not  for 
this,  the  difficulties  of  the  way  might  well  have  dismayed  us. 

.24^/(. — A  remarkably  interesting  meetiug  at  Danville, 
and  unusually  peaceful  evening,  in  which  I  enjoyed  social 
intercourse. 

2^th. — This  day  much  sunk,  but  refreshed  by  the  way,  by 
the  hospitable  Avelcome  of  some  new  settlers  (not  Friends). 
Hospitality  is  a  virtue  I  more  and  more  prize,  and  we  find 
it  abound  in  this  land. 

2&th. — Rose  early,  and  went  three  miles  to  a  Friend's  house 
to  breakfast,  and  with  some  effort,  to  Sugar  Creek  Meeting, 
which  afforded  refreshment  to  a  very  tried  and  weary 
soul ;  then  to  Craw'fordsville,  where  a  meeting  had  been 
appointed  for  us  with  the  people  of  the  town.  I  came 
out  of  it  w  ith  a  glow  of  soul  so  sweet  that  I  thought  my  work 
was  surely  done  and  I  might  enjoy  myself ;  so  I  began 
earnestly  to  write,  but  had  to  repent  this  self-indulgence  and 
neglect  of  others. 

27th. — A  cold  sorry  night,  the  air  coming  in  freely  on  all 
sides  ;  it  seemed  hardly  safe  to  go  over  the  prairies,  and  our 
drivers  were  well  pleased  when  we  concluded  that  it  was  best 


."ET.  44-.] 


1831. 


127 


to  stay.  Visited  six  families,  and  returned  in  a  remarkably 
peaceful  state  of  mind. 

29>tk. — Visited  more  families. 

2,0ih. — Another  meeting  at  Crawfordsville.  A  second 
meeting  in  a  place  is  trying  to  my  faith ;  but  it  ended  in  a 
peace  which  I  trust  marked  it  as  no  imaginary  requiring. 

\st  of  12th  mo. — A  day  of  renewal  of  faith  in  the  possession 
of  a  peace  which  the  world  cannot  give. 

6th. — A  long  ride  over  the  prairies  to  Flint.  The  condition 
of  the  people,  or,  as  they  themselves  term  it,  the  manner  in 
which  they  are  fixed,  is  very  poor.  What  would,  in  England, 
be  thought  of  having  no  other  light  by  which  to  see  the  food 
on  the  table,  than  what  is  admitted  by  the  door  being  set 
open,  with  the  thermometer  at  zero  ?  Yet,  through  all,  we 
are  preserved  in  health. 

— Another  long  ride  over  the  prairies,  ended  by  our 
missing  the  way  and  having  to  leave  the  carriage  and  walk 
through  deep  snow  to  a  miserable  cabin,  where  we  lodged. 
It  might  be  right  for  us  to  be  thus  detained ;  for  the  next 
morning  we  visited,  in  a  neighbouring  cabin,  a  poor  old  woman, 
who  bore  the  character  among  her  neighbours  of  being 
"  middling  wicked.''  She  was  very  dirty  ;  had  a  stern,  dark, 
miserable  countenance — was  sitting  by  a  log  fire,  muttering 
to  herself — an  opening  in  the  wall,  close  beside  her,  admitted 
the  cats  and  the  cold  air.  My  husband  read  to  her  the  story 
of  the  Jew  and  his  daughter, — the  latter,  on  her  death-bed, 
entreating  her  father  to  read  the  New  Testament,  and  no 
more  to  speak  against  Jesus  of  Nazareth.  The  old  woman 
was  much  affected,  sat  with  her  elbows  on  her  knees,  and 
shook  her  head  with  evident  feeling.  We  afterwards  ad- 
dressed her,  and  I  did  not  feel  this  visit  to  be  among  the 
fruitless  acts  of  my  life.  She  could  not  read,  and  evidently 
felt  the  privation.  We  left  a  New  Testament  with  her 
daughter-in-law,  who  we  hoped,  might  read  it  to  her.  Well, 
I  thought,  if  this  poor  soul  might  be  helped,  our  perils  were 
worth  encountering.  After  this,  we  proceeded  to  Thornton, 
and  though  very  weary,  had  in  the  evening  a  meeting  in  the 
Presbyterian  Chapel,  which  wonderfully  refreshed  me. 

11th,  First-day. — Another  public  meeting  at  Crawfords- 
ville, an  awful  one  to  me.     However,  I  believe  that  our 


128 


1S81. 


[.-KT  '4.4. 


prayers  were  licard  ;  for  this  meeting,  wliicli  cost  me  so  much, 
proved  one  wliieli  dre\y  tlie  minds  of  the  people  more  to  their 
right  centre  than  most  we  have  held.  Earnest  had  been  my 
desire  that  I  might  be  preserved  in  silence  if  I  was  either 
mistaken  in  appointing  the  meeting,  or  if  it  was  right  that 
our  testimony  to  silence  should  be  upheld  throughout.  We 
had,  however,  something  to  communicate,  and  my  mind  was 
delightfully  relieved.  The  thermometer  is  13  or  14  degrees 
below  zero  ;  so  you  may  imagine  what  this  cold  is,  and  be 
surprised  to  find  that  we  are  often  sleeping  in  houses,  on  every 
side  of  which,  we  may  see  the  sky  through  the  holes  in  the 
logs. 

12th. —  Called  on  some  of  our  Crawfordsville  friends,  who 
took  leave  of  us  with  tears  in  their  eyes.  I  believe  there  are 
some  very  serious  people  in  this  place,  but  was  glad  to  get 
out  of  it,  with  the  hope  that  I  had  no  more  labour  there. 

ISth. — Went  on  to  another  meeting, — the  weather  was 
so  unusually  severe  that  few  came  to  it.  The  cold  is  so 
intense  that  many  have  been  frost-bitten,  i.e.  the  flesh  be- 
comes so  brittle  that  it  may  be  broken  off  without  sensation; 
by  applying  snow,  life  returns  to  the  part  affected,  and  with 
it,  inflammation.  We  are  in  no  danger  wrapped  up  as  we 
are  in  the  carriage,  but  I  am  rather  afraid  for  our  driver. 

Nothing  will  do  in  this  service  but  not  counting  our  lives, 
or  anything  we  may  have  a  life  in,  dear  unto  ourselves  ;  yet 
I  do  hope  that  a  day  will  arrive,  even  in  this  land,  when  the 
task  of  living  in  it  may  not  be  so  hard.  Were  it  not  for  some 
hours  of  decided  sunshine  in  my  soul,  I  could  not  support  it ; 
and  a  few  of  these  have  been  very  bi'ight. 

14^A  and  15ih. — Days  too  cold  to  venture  over  the 
prairies,  the  thermometer  25°  below  zero,  in  some  places 
27°.  It  is  considered  to  be  lower  than  it  has  been  before 
known  in  this  country.  We  were  in  a  cabin  not  air-tight, 
the  head  of  our  bed  about  three  yards  from  a  large  wood  fire, 
covered  with  abundance  of  clothes  (all  most  needful) .  If  our 
hands  or  face  were  in  the  least  exposed,  the  sensation  was 
like  that  of  having  ice  applied  to  them.  Water  froze  within 
three  feet  of  the  fire,  but  wrapped  in  my  cloak,  bonnet,  hood, 
veil,  &c.,  &c.,  I  am  seldom  thoroughly  chilled. 

16th. — The  weather  has  now  become  more  moderate.  We 


jET.  4-1.] 


1831. 


129 


made  several  calls,  my  mind  enjoying  uncommon  peace.  We 
are  in  very  good  health,  which  truly  is  a  favour.  How  often 
does  my  mind  turn  towards  you  in  the  remembrance  of  this 
time  last  year  !  What  suffering  have  we  passed  through  since 
then  !  And  perhaps  also,  Ave  have  never  been  made  more 
sensible  of  a  peace  which  the  world  can  neither  give  nor 
take  away,  and  in  which  the  remembrance  of  each  other,  and 
of  those  we  dearly  love,  has  something  in  it  of  that  heaven 
in  which  there  is  no  more  separation. 

17th. — Came  over  the  prairies  to  Flint.  A  very  cold  day, 
and  the  wind  blowing  bitterly. 

I8th. — Attended  the  morning  meeting  of  Friends,  which 
was  a  time  of  close  trial  and  conflict,  but  I  felt  peaceful  after 
it.  We  dined  at  the  house  of  our  kind  friend  and  companion 
for  the  last  month,  David  Horner,  and  set  off  after  it  to  La 
Fayette,  where  a  meeting  was  appointed  at  early  candlelight, 
according  to  the  custom  of  the  country.  The  road  excellent 
most  of  the  way,  but  coming  to  a  half- frozen  stream,  we  had 
to  get  out,  and  it  was  well  we  did,  for  the  carriage  again 
broke;  but  our  old  friend  the  rail  was  applied,  and  we  reached 
the  meeting,  though  rather  past  the  time.  It  was  a  large 
gathering,  in  the  Methodist  Meeting-house,  and  I  have  no 
doubt  it  was  a  good  meeting. 

22nd. — Some  visits  in  the  morning,  to  satisfaction.  It 
surely  cannot  be  of  ourselves,  when  we  are  led  to  describe 
correctly  the  state  of  individuals,  almost  without  seeing  them. 
Such  eneoui'agement  that  we  are  under  Divine  direction 
cheers  me  from  time  to  time. 

2Ath. — Made  more  calls,  went  some  miles  to  a  public 
meeting,  and  returned  home  after  it  with  a  mind  and  body 
restored  by  a  sense  of  mercy  and  love  being  near. 

2hth. — *  *  *  The  people  of  Israel  suffered  formerly  because 
they  did  not  serve  the  Lord  with  joyfulness  and  gladness  of 
heart.  I  am  ready  to  reproach  myself  for  not  being  a  more 
cheerful  servant ;  but  then  again,  I  am  comforted  by  a 
knowledge  that  He  who  knows  us  altogether  as  we  are,  is 
touched  with  compassion  for  the  deep  conflicts  which  I  pass 
through,  and  is  at  times  graciously  pleased  to  say — "  Peace, 
be  stiU."  It  may  be  right  that  I  should  pass  through  dis- 
pensations so  remarkably  proving  to  me  my  own  weakness,  in 

K 


130 


1831. 


[jet.  44. 


order  to  bring  me  yet  more  fully  to  the  acknowledgment  that 
every  good  and  perfect  gift  cometh  from  above. 

26th,  27th,  and  28/A. — Visiting  families,  and  holding  two 
more  public  meetings,  after  -which  the  clear  sentence,  "  It  is 
enough,"  was  joyfully  received  :  with  it,  on  the — 

2'dth — We  w^ere  glad  to  go  forward  and  cross  the 
"Wabash,  fifteen  miles,  to  a  meeting  appointed  for  us.  A 
fatiguing  ride,  but  I  think  we  were  helped ;  and  the  next 
morning,  after  many  tears  and  close  conflict,  I  gave  up  to 
visiting  the  families  in  the  small  settlement  of  Friends  at 
Pine. 

31*^. — The  dogs  were  howling  all  night  at  the  wolves,  and  I 
awoke  low  enough.  We  visited  the  few  remaining  families,  in 
which  there  was  some  life:  and  it  was  concluded  that  this  last 
day  of  a  year,  not  soon  to  be  forgotten,  in  which  bright 
beams  of  sunshine  and  dark  clouds  of  the  sky  have  been 
I'emarkably  my  portion,  should  be  given  to  rest — so  I  take  it 
in  the  carriage  writing  to  you,  as  there  is  no  window  to  give 
light  enough  in  the  house,  or  a  table  unoccupied ;  yet  I  am, 
perhaps,  just  now  as  happy  in  my  fur  cloak,  with  my  cushion 
on  my  lap  to  write  upon,  as  I  have  at  times  been  in  my  own 
drawing-room.  Well !  this  year  is  about  to  close  :  may  the 
year  to  come  (if  it  does  come  to  us),  through  the  tender  mercy 
of  the  Shepherd  of  Israel,  find  us  standing  each  day  in 
our  own  allotment ;  and  however  suff^ering  it  may  be,  may 
He  grant  us  to  stand  in  the  faith,  and  abide  in  the  patience, 
that  no  murmuring  voice  may  be  heard  ;  and  if  it  seem  good 
in  his  holy  sight  to  give  to  some  of  ns  an  easier  path  than 
we  have  of  late  had,  and  to  bring  us  on  our  way  rejoicing, 
may  it  renew  our  desires  to  be  dedicated,  body,  soul  and  spirit, 
to  his  service,  and  enable  us  to  ascribe  the  glory  and  praise 
to  Him  M'ho  ruleth  over  all ! 


jet.  44.] 


1832. 


131 


CHAPTER  IX. 

MORE  MEETINGS  AND  FAMILIES  VISITED  IN   INDIANA  PRIVATIONS  AND 

DIFFICULTIES  FIRST-DAY  SCHOOLS  RAPID  JOURNEY  TO  PHILA- 
DELPHIA PHILADELPHIA  YEARLY  MEETING  JONATHAN  BACK- 
HOUSE  RETURNS  TO  ENGLAND. 

2nd  of  \st  mo.,  1832. — Yielded  to  the  discouragement  of  a 
snowstorm,  and  the  apprehended  difficulties  of  crossing  the 
river,  and  turned  aside  from  a  town  in  which  I  wished  to  have 
a  meeting.  So  on  this  day,  I  could  with  Titus  exclaim — 
"  I  have  lost  a  day  !  " 

Srd. — After  a  difficult  ride,  held  a  meeting  at  Attica.  The 
people  were  very  earnest  to  come,  and  if  they  received  what 
was  preached  to  them  they  will  be  nearer  perfection  than  one 
at  least  who  spoke  to  them,  who  more  than  daily  finds  she 
has  not  attained. 

4th. — Two  more  meetings  this  day ;  the  first,  at  Portland, 
a  very  interesting  one. 

5th. — Another  meeting,  at  a  village  on  the  Wabash ; 
afterwards  dined  on  wild  turkey,  nicely  cooked,  which  was  a 
real  treat  to  us,  as  we  had  for  days  been  feeding  on  pork  or 
tough  chickens. 

6th. — At  Eugene  we  had  a  comfortable  sojourn,  and  a 
meeting  which  proved  a  true  encouragement  to  go  on.  My 
mind  remarkably  refreshed  after  it,  and  I  enjoyed  that  day 
much  peace. 

11th. — A  day  of  stripes,  ending  in  rest  and  peace. 

loth,  First-day. — A  meeting  which  I  believe  will  not  soon 
be  forgotten  by  many  who  attended  it,  so  that  after  having 
been  sunk  inexpressibly  low,  we  are  sometimes  raised  again 
so  as  to  feel  it  truly  ungrateful  to  begrudge  our  labours  on 
these  poor  inhabitants  of  the  wilderness.  Many  tears  were 
shed  when  we  took  our  leave,  and  proceeded  by  moonlight  to 
John  Hayworth's.  The  snow  is  melting  fast,  and  the  weather 
quite  mild,  in  consequence  of  which  we  got  into  one  of  our 

K  2 


132 


1832. 


[yET.  45. 


old  mud-holes.  I  came  over  on  a  rail  taken  from  the  fence, 
and  having  a  mind  very  much  at  peace,  stood  pretty  con- 
tentedly on  the  prairie  for  nearly  an  hour. 

2lst. — Tired  in  mind  and  not  well  in  hody,  I  gave  up  to 
entire  rest.  I  trust  the  prayer  for  patience  may  have  been 
heard,  for  towards  evening  my  troubled  soul  was  calmed, 
and  my  strength  revived. 

22nd. — Went  to  meeting  at  Ellwood,  and  gave  up  to  the 
thought  of  visiting  the  families  of  this  meeting.  The  end  of 
this  day  and  the  two  next,  the  28rd  and  24th,  fully  occupied 
in  visiting  families,  but  the  weather  again  so  intensely  cold 
that  we  could  not  accomplish  all  we  had  planned. 

30^/i. — We  had  an  interesting  assembly  in  the  evening  (at 
Thomas  Cook's),  of  a  number  of  Charity  Cook's  descendants, 
who  are  the  principal  occupiers  of  this  settlement. 

31st. — Attended  the  funeral  of  a  young  man  who  died 
after  a  few  days'  illness,  owing  in  part  (it  was  supposed)  to 
exposure  to  the  intense  cold  :  it  was  an  interesting  occasion, 
and  one  which  I  hope  might  arouse  the  dead,  many  of  whom, 
in  a  spiritual  sense,  were  I  believe  present. 

Is^  of  2nd  mo. — Went  on  seven  miles  to  Newport,  and  had 
a  meeting  with  the  inhabitants,  which  brought  a  delightful 
beam  of  light  and  suushine  into  my  soul.  Crossed  the 
Wabash,  and  at  Montezuma  had  another  very  crowded  and  I 
believe  good  meeting.  I  began  to  feel  as  if  my  wheels  were 
again  oiled. 

2nd. — A  nine  miles  ride  over  a  bad  road  to  a  Friends'  meet- 
ing, which  was  also  a  relieving  one.  Went  afterwards  quickly 
to  Rockville,  a  county  town,  where  we  had  a  large  and 
crowded  meeting,  in  which  I  forgot  my  fatigues,  and  I  believe 
was  anointed  for  the  occasion,  but  was  nearly  fainting  when 
the  meeting  was  over. 

12//i. — A  day  of  cl6uds.  The  carriage  broken,  and  could 
not  proceed. 

13th. — Very  low  ;  I  sobbed  bitterly.  We  took  the  carriage 
to  a  blacksmith's  some  miles  off.  A  hard  frost  had  made  the 
roads  even  worse  than  before.  My  dear  husband  rode  on 
horseback,  and  I  was  alone  weeping  in  the  carriage. 

lOtli. —  *  *  *  In  endeavouring  to  be  led  by  faith,  all  the 
wisdom  of  the  wise  and  the  understanding  of  the  prudent 


^ET.  45.] 


1833. 


133 


have  again  and  again  to  be  broken  to  pieces,  and  we  have  to 
throw  ourselves  upon  the  mercy  and  goodness  of  Him  who 
orders  all  things  wisely.  We  had  a  meeting  near  the  black- 
smith's shop,  which  dried  up  my  tears ;  the  people  were 
very  affectiouatej  and  in  returning,  my  heart  flowed  with 
love. 

15/^. — Visited  several  families  in  the  neighbourhood : 
lodged  at  a  house  in  which  lived  a  poor  woman  who  had  lost 
the  power  of  speech,  and  was  totally  helpless,  yet  with  her 
understanding  clear.  I  have  no  doubt  that  our  visit — though 
she  could  not  wipe  away  the  tears  which  she  shed  abundantly — 
was  a  comfort  to  her.  She  had  been  a  sinner,  but,  I  trust, 
will  be  made  fit  for  a  world  in  which  there  is  no  more 
temptation,  sickness  or  sorrow. 

20th. — Visiting  families  as  before,  my  faith  strengthened 
by  the  occurrences  of  the  day,  in  speaking  to  individuals. 
One  young  man  took  hold  of  my  hand,  and  with  tears  in  his 
eyes,  said  he  hoped  he  should  do  better.  I  thought  he  was 
a  stray  one,  and  had  addressed  him  as  such  :  so  if  one  sinner 
be  converted  from  the  error  of  his  way,  of  what  little  account 
ought  our  sufferings  to  be  ! 

Bloomfield,  22nd. — A  large  meeting  of  the  children  and 
young  people  of  the  settlement,  in  a  good  school,  for  the 
purpose  of  establishing  a  weekly  meeting  for  their  instruction 
in  the  scriptures.  It  was  a  particularly  interesting  occasion  : 
old  and  young  seemed  surprised  at  their  ignorance,  when  they 
came  to  be  examined,  and  all  were  earnest  to  apply  the  remedy. 
The  plan  proposed  is  that  they  should  read  chapters  in  the 
historical  parts  of  the  Bible,  during  the  week,  and  learn  by 
heart  certain  portions.  They  are  to  repeat  what  they  have 
learned,  and  to  be  questioned  in  the  chapters  that  have  been 
read,  on  a  First-day  afternoon.  Some  intelligent  Friends 
have  taken  charge  of  the  school.  One  young  man  was  so 
pleased  with  the  plan,  that  the  Bible  was  hardly  out  of  his 
hands  during  the  time  we  were  there.* 

*  A  Friend  who  visited  Indiana  nearly  twenty  years  afterwards 
writes  as  follows : — 

"Few  can  estimate  the  value  of  H.  C.  Backhouse's  labours  in  America, 
and  the  permanent  results  which  have  followed,  and  are  still  developing. 
In  no  portion  of  the  Society  are  they  perhaps  more  conspicuous 


134 


1832. 


[^T.  45. 


2Srd. — The  roads  from  snow  and  frost  almost  impassable, 
and  the  carriage  so  broken  that  it  must  again  be  mended. 
My  husband  took  his  horse  and  went  with  the  dignitaries  of 
the  churcli  to  consider  the  important  business  of  the  esta- 
blishment of  another  meeting,  Friends  residing  so  far  oflF 
they  can  hardly  attend  the  one  now  established.  In  the 
meantime,  with  a  sensible  old  Friend  helping  me,  I  sat  down 
and  repaired  our  clothes,  which  are  reduced  to  a  very  low 
estate ;  but  with  two  or  three  hours'  work,  we  filled  up  the 
holes,  and  mended  the  rags.  The  morning  was,  I  may 
acknowledge,  spent  in  peace  and  comfort,  raising  a  hope  that 
thei*e  would  be  a  calm  of  longer  duration  granted  me,  after 
these  toils  are  over. 

The  following  month  was  similarly  occupied,  in  the 
same  neighbourhood,  in  visiting  families,  and  in  holding 
public  meetings  almost  daily.  Of  one  at  Rockville, 
H.  C.  Backhouse  remarks  :  "  This  truly  dreaded  meeting 
proved  a  very  good  one, — the  subjects  new,  and  bearing 
upon  our  peculiar  testimonies." 

Describing  the  aspect  of  the  country,  she  writes  : — 

The  principal  feature  of  interest  in  the  country  at  this 
time,  is  the  making  of  sugar  from  the  maple  tree.  A  cut  is 
made  in  the  trees,  and  the  saccharine  juice  is  drawn  from 
them  by  spiles,  and  is  then  boiled  down,  first  to  treacle,  and 
afterwards,  by  means  of  eggs,  milk,  or  ley,  it  is  turned  into 
sugar.  This  sugar  and  treacle  have  often  been  meat  and  drink 
for  us. 

ISth  of  Brd  mo. — First-day,  at  Honey  Creek,  the  Hicksites 
met  in  one  side  of  the  meeting-house ;  but  our  side  was  so 
full  that  the  door  was  opened  between,  which  I  believe  they 

than  in  Indiana,  where  more  than  one-third  of  the  whole  body  of 
Friends  in  America  are  now  reaping,  through  the  divine  blessing,  as  we 
may  humbly  trust,  the  fruit  of  those  exercises  into  which  she  was  led 
on  behalf  of  the  rising  generation,  in  the  present  and  continuous  enjoy- 
ment of  an  amount  of  scriptural  instruction  exceeded  in  none  of  the 
Yearly  Meetings  of  that  land." 


jET.  45.] 


1832. 


135 


wished.  We  were  favoured  to  declare  the  truths  of  the 
gospel,  and  my  poor  mind  enjoyed  some  sunshine  afterwards. 

25th. — An  interesting  meeting  with  the  few  families  of 
Friends,  after  which  I  felt  very  peaceful.  I  trust  we  may 
have  been  the  means  of  helping  them  to  meet  together  for 
worship,  which  by  giving  way  to  discouragement  they  had 
neglected. 

26ih. — Parted  with  our  kind  friends  the  Hallidays,  who 
expressed  themselves  much  comforted  by  our  visit,  which  was 
cheering. 

27th. — Two  meetings  on  our  road  to  Vincennes.  This  day 
the  call  seemed  most  clear  to  me  to  Philadelphia  Yearly 
Meeting,  and  that  we  should  despatch  business  quickly. 

There  was  now  an  interval  of  little  more  than  two 
weeks  before  the  occurrence  of  the  Yearly  Meeting. 
Several  places  towards  which  they  felt  attracted  had 
yet  to  be  visited,  and  in  the  then  state  of  communi- 
cation it  seemed  all  but  impracticable  that  they  should 
reach  Philadelphia  in  time.  But  their  faith  was  strong, 
and,  as  we  have  already  seen,  their  will  and  power  to 
surmount  obstacles  not  small.  We  give  a  few  extracts 
marking  the  character  of  this  arduous  and  rapid 
journey. 

28th. — Meeting  at  Bruceville  in  the  morning,  and  Vin- 
cennes in  the  evening ;  a  memorable  day  of  favour :  my 
bonds  seemed  bursting,  and  power  given  in  a  weary  frame  to 
proclaim  the  truths  of  the  gospel,  especially  in  a  very  large 
meeting  at  Vincennes.  An  Episcopal  clergyman  came  up  to 
us  afterwards  to  express  his  satisfaction  with  the  service  of 
the  day. 

29^/i.-With  some  difficulty  reached  Washington,  [Indiana,] 
where  we  had  another  meeting.  The  same  day  went  many 
miles  further  to  Mount  Pleasant,  and  held  a  meeting  in  the 
evening  in  the  Court-house — the  Court  was  at  that  time 
sitting  in  the  day — at  which  many  of  the  lawyers,  &c.  M  ere 
present. 


136 


1832. 


[.ET.  45. 


SOih. — We  went  to  the  gaol,  to  see  a  man  who  was  that 
day  to  take  his  trial  for  murder.  I  thought  there  was  some 
of  the  authorit}'  of  the  Gospel  in  that  visit.  Well,  overturns 
may  soon  ai'rive,  and  a  curious  one  did  befall  us  soon  after. 
In  going  down  a  hill,  from  which  no  danger  could  have  been 
anticipated,  George  locked  the  wheel,  the  drag  had  an  iron 
prod  in  it  for  the  frost,  this  prod  caught  the  end  of  a  piece  of 
M'ood  lying  in  the  road,  which  was  exactly  adapted  to  act  as 
a  lever,  and  threw  the  carriage  over.  We  were  neither 
frightened  nor  hurt ;  but  the  carriage  was  so  broken  that  it 
required  an  hour's  mending,  in  cm'ious  fashion  to  be  sure. 
The  people  of  the  town  came  most  willingly  to  help  us,  and 
would  receive  nothing  for  their  labour.  Here  we  heard  what 
was  said  of  the  meeting  and  ■s'isit  to  the  prison ;  so,  alto- 
gether, our  overturn  cheered  me,  and  had  not  the  carriage 
been  so  repaired,  it  would  have  broken  to  pieces  in  the  very 
rough  road  we  had  afterwards  to  encounter  in  going  to 
Paoli. 

3lst. — A  very  good  [public]  meeting  at  nine  o'clock  at 
Paoli,  and  a  satisfactory  one  with  the  Friends,  and  then  on 
to  Salem. 

Salem,  1st  of  mo. —  In  the  morning  a  Friends' 
meeting — a  large  one  a  few  miles  off — a  day  of  favour. 
Gave  some  instruction  about  teaching  the  Scriptures  to  a 
large  company  of  young  people  at  William  Hobbs's,  a  very 
nice  substantial  Friend.  Oh,  I  was  weary  !  but  I  had  some 
refreshment  at  night ; — pleasantly  waited  upon  by  some 
young  people, — quite  a  treat. 

2nd. — iSIade  one  call  in  Salem,  and  should  have  made  two. 
It  is  surprising  how  these  flies  of  omission  get  into  the 
ointment  of  the  apothecary  and  ruin  it.  Rode  to  Albany ; 
enough  for  flesh  and  blood. 

3rd. — A  meeting  at  Albany  in  the  morning  excellent ;  that 
at  Louisville  in  the  evening  as  little  so.  I  ought  to  have 
appointed  another  at  nine  the  next  morning,  but  not  doing 
so  involved  me  in  much  trial. 

4:th. — A  day  almost  uselessly  spent,  except  in  visiting  a 
prison  in  a  most  wretched  state.  The  prisoners  had  nothing 
to  lie  upon ;  in  short,  as  they  said,  "  put  in  like  any  creatures 


^T.  45.] 


1833. 


137 


to  herd  together,"  and  must  go  out  worse  than  they  came  in. 
They  had  no  Bible  or  Testament,  and  seemed  truly  pleased 
by  our  visit. 

bth. — A  meeting  at  Louisville  in  the  morning,  though  but 
with  few,  very  reUeving.  In  the  afternoon  we  went  to  the 
Poor-house.  What  places  in  comparison  with  those  in  other 
towns  !  but  some  good  seemed  astir,  and  some  accommodation 
for  the  body.  An  evening  meeting,  painful  to  me.  The 
people  are  slaveholders,  and  it  is  a  noted  bad  place. 

Qth. — A  meeting  at  Jeflfersonville.  The  longing  to  be  ofi" 
spoiled  my  meeting,  which  my  husband  said  was  a  very  good 
one.  The  steamboat  took  us  up  afterwards.  May  we  reach 
Philadelphia  in  time  for  the  select  meeting  ! 

Nights  in  a  steam-boat  are  not  delightful ;  but  this  was 
more  restful  than  some  I  have  passed,  my  mind  having  now 
no  anxiety  but  that  of  accomplishing  our  object,  which  did 
not  seem  very  probable.  However,  we  reached  Cincinnati  on 
the  morning  of  the — 

7th. — I  did  not  land,  as  one  of  the  fastest  sailing-boats  on 
the  river  was  nearly  ready  to  start.  Here  we  left  George 
and  the  old  broken  carriage  and  horses,  to  go  and  refresh  at 
some  kind  friends'  in  the  country,  and  steamed  on  rapidly  up 
the  Ohio ;  the  state  of  the  weather,  the  waters,  and  moonlight, 
being  all  in  our  favour.  We  took  under  our  protection  a 
young  Friend  who  had  set  her  mind  on  attending  the  Phila- 
delphia Yearly  Meeting.  My  dear  husband  and  I  had  a 
state-cabin  to  ourselves,  which  was  a  relief, 

8//«. —  A  First-day  in  a  steam-boat  is  not  without  its  cares 
and  exercises.  We  had  a  reading  with  the  cabin  passengers, 
in  which  an  agreeable  young  man,  educating  for  a  clergyman, 
united  by  reading  a  pamphlet  of  William  Allen's.  These 
are  fearful  occasions  to  me,  but  omitted,  I  believe  they  would 
leave  dissatisfaction.  We  found  it,  on  this  as  on  many  other 
occasions,  easier  to  preach  to  the  poor  than  to  the  rich  : 
whether  it  be  a  real  diflFerence  in  them,  or  only  because  the 
latter  tempt  more  to  the  fear  of  man,  I  will  not  pretend  to 
determine.  The  passengers  were  very  friendly  with  each 
other.  We  had  some  conversation  with  a  J ewess,  who  was  on 
board  with  her  children,  in  unison  with  our  young  friend,  the 
clergyman,  and  some  Unitarians,    It  was  interesting,  but  I 


138 


1832. 


[^T,  45. 


was  afraid  of  raising  the  Jewish  spirit  of  unbelief  into  anger^ 
and  thereby  wounding  in  spirit  the  cause  we  would  maintain 
by  word.  Her  faith  seemed  wavering,  and  she  acknowledged 
to  me  an  interesting  fact, — that  the  Jews  are  becoming  less 
observant  of  their  religious  rites,  and  ai'e  more  indifferent  about 
their  faith ;  so  the  ground  may  be  prepared  for  their  eventual 
reception  of  Christianity.  Truly  there  was  something  to  be 
felt  in  the  spirit  of  that  woman,  which  marked  a  wandering 
from  the  Shepherd  of  Israel. 

10th. — Landed  at  Wheeling  :  my  dear  husband  sought  out 
a  capital  conveyance  in  an  opposition  line  of  new  coaches, 
and  uniting  with  some  of  our  fellow-passengers — some  young 
people  with  their  infant  of  a  month  old,  and  nurse — we  plea- 
santly filled  an  excellent  coach  with  three  seats.  We  had  plenty 
of  room,  which  was  what  we  stood  in  need  of.  Here  we  met  a 
multitude  of  letters,  which  after  we  were  seated  in  the  coach 
we  opened ;  you  may  imagine  with  what  sensations,  as  it  was 
I  think  four  months  since  we  had  heard  any  intelligence 
from  home.  I  felt  very  peaceful,  and  I  believe  I  may  say 
grateful  to  receive  such  good  accounts. 

llth. — Summoned  early,  after  a  short  night,  into  our  coach. 
We  again  had  a  long  and  prosperous  day's  journey  over  the 
Alleghany  mountains,  agreeing  very  well  with  our  com- 
panions. We  were  pretty  tired,  for  the  road  was  not  the 
smoothest,  but  the  weather  was  most  favourable. 

12th. — Again  a  very  short  night^s  rest,  but  not  so  long  a 
day's  journey  to  Frederick's  Town,  where,  after  refreshing 
ourselves  with  water  and  a  good  supper,  we  took  possession 
of  a  coach  on  the  railroad,  had  straw  laid  on  the  bottom,  on 
which  myself  and  our  young  friend  and  her  baby  reposed 
many  hours,  as  we  were  taken  rapidly  and  easily  in  the  dead 
of  the  night  sixty  miles  to  Baltimore.  Arriving  very  early 
Ave  entered  no  house,  but  between  five  and  six  o'clock  in  the 
morning  of  the — 

13th — Found  ourselves  on  board  the  boats  that  go  in  a 
day  to  Philadelphia.  My  spirit  was  remarkably  at  rest  and 
peace.  Truly  I  was  tired,  but  sunshine  of  mind  is  most 
invigorating.  Such  a  journey  in  so  short  a  time  with  the 
same  degree  of  rest  was,  it  is  supposed,  never  performed  over 
the  same  ground.     Arrived  in  Philadelphia,  it  was  truly 


.•ET.  45.]  1832.  139 

sweet  to  lay  my  head  dowu  in  peace,  and  feel  myself  more 
among  my  particular  friends,  and  at  home,  than  at  any 
place  in  the  Avorld  that  is  not  really  so. 

14:th. — Most  kindly  and  sweetly  welcomed  by  Friends,  and 
my  heart  was  fully  open  to  receive  their  kind  greetings.  I 
came  out  of  meeting  very  comfortable  :  a  solid  one  I  believe 
it  was. 

16th. — Comfortable  meetings ;  my  mind  covered  with 
peace. 

20th. — I  Avent  into  the  men's  meeting  to  my  own  relief. 
Our  meeting  ended  I  trust  with  real  solemnity.  Never  have  I 
attended  any  Yearly  Meeting  in  which  my  own  path  was  made 
so  clear  to  me.  No  one  was  very  active,  but  many  have  ex- 
pressed that  it  was  one  of  the  most  comforting  Yearly  Meetings 
they  had  had  for  years.  The  state  of  my  mind  so  much 
resembled  that  in  which  I  was  before  I  left  all,  that  it  felt  as 
a  merciful  preparation  for  a  change  that  could  hardly  have 
been  borne,  or  rightly  borne,  without  it ;  and  it  was  evident 
that  the  hearts  of  Friends  were  remarkably  open  towards  us ; 
our  hardships  seemed  to  have  endeared  us  to  them. 

The  change  here  spoken  of  was  nothing  less  than  the 
return  home  of  her  husband  and  fellow-labourer  in  the 
Grospel,  leaving  H.  C.  Backhouse  to  prosecute  her  Master's 
work  for  a  time  without  him. 

Her  need  in  this  trial  was  remarkably  supplied  by 
one  who,  though  young  in  years  and  Christian  expe- 
rience, was  prepared,  both  naturally  and  spiritually,  to 
be  to  her  what  Timothy  was  to  Paul. 

25^A. — Twelfth  Sti-eet  Monthly  Meeting,  a  memorable  time 
to  me.  E.  Kirkbride  laid  her  concern  before  the  meeting, 
in  writing,  as  she  had  a  bad  hoarseness.  The  effect  on  the 
meeting  was  striking.  So  young  a  person,  or  rather  one  so 
lately  become  known  in  the  character  of  a  serious  Friend, 
was  enough  to  excite  the  fears  of  the  prudent  j  but  the 
covering  over  the  meeting  was  such,  that  fear  was  driven 
backwards,  and  faith  prevailed ;  so  that  there  was  a  very 


140 


1832. 


[yET.  45. 


general  expression  of  unity,  and  many  shed  tears  that  such 
a  thing  could  be.  It  was  indeed  a  confirmation  of  my  faith 
that  she  has  been  especially  given  to  minister  unto  me. 

I  very  fully  expressed  my  feelings  with  regard  to  her  in 
the  Monthly  Meeting  and  how  jealous  I  had  been  of  myself 
in  them ;  yet  boldly  confessing  that  I  believed  it  was  a  merci- 
ful provision  of  the  Great  Head  of  the  Church,  who  knew 
us  altogether  as  we  were,  and  all  the  circumstances  of  our 
lives,  to  choose  for  me  one  so  remarkably  adapted  to  minister 
to  my  necessities,  and  whom  I  loved  as  an  adopted  child. 

With  this  day's  work  I  think  I  must  end  this  part  of  my 
journal — a  day  I  increasingly  believe  I  may  number  among 
the  tender  and  unmerited  mercies  of  my  Heavenly  Father, 
who,  knowing  our  frame,  will  not  put  upon  us  a  burden  that 
He  will  not  make  preparation  for  us  to  bear.  "  Thy  gentle- 
ness hath  made  me  great,"  is  a  language  I  have  often  thought 
of    Farewell ! 

Accompanied  by  E.  P.  Kirkbride,  H.  C.  Backhouse 
now  proceeded  to  Virginia,  to  attend  the  Yearly  Meeting 
for  that  state,  held  at  Gravelly  Run. 

12th. — Reached  Baltimore  in  good  time.  The  change  is 
great,  but  I  am  so  satisfied  in  its  being  right  for  my  dear 
husband  to  leave  me,  that  all  regret  is  taken  away,  and  I  can 
rejoice  in  believing  that  his  mind  rests  in  the  same  peace. 
We  spent  the  afternoon  at  Gerard  Hopkins',  who  is,  I  fear, 
in  a  very  precarious  state  of  health.  He  seemed  much 
pleased  to  see  us,  and  spoke  most  affectionately  of  my  husband; 
indeed  it  has  been  sweet  to  me  to  see  how  he  is  beloved. 

I4th. — Up  at  half-past  five  o'clock  to  write  to  my  husband; 
breakfasted  early,  had  a  sitting  with  the  Kings,  and  after- 
wards with  Gerard  Hopkins,  and  was  in  the  boat  by  nine 
o'clock. 

15th. — After  steaming  down  the  Chesapeake,  we  landed  at 
a  place  that  looked  like  an  old-fashioned  English  gentleman's 
seat,  and  found  it  one  of  the  most  celebrated  places  in  the 
neighbourhood,  beautifully  situated  on  James  river.  The 
owners  were  very  civil,  and  allowed  their  carriage  to  take  us 


MT.  45,] 


1832. 


141 


five  miles  to  a  Friend's  hoiise  (Hargrave),  in  which  we  found 
comfortable  and  hospitable  entertainment. 

I6th. — With  the  wife  of  Flemming  Bates,  drove  to  the 
meeting  of  ministers  and  elders,  five  miles  through  the 
woods  :  the  whole  number  amounted  to  ten  persons.  We 
were  the  only  women,  and  four  of  the  company  strangers.  It 
was  a  new  character  of  meeting  ;  they  seemed  from  cir- 
cumstances so  heartless,  that,  although  valuable  as  in- 
dividuals, all  energy  as  a  meeting  seemed  gone.  I  did  not 
feel  out  of  my  place  being  there. 

17th. — A  most  awful  tempest  came  on,  which  prevented  our 
going  on  as  we  had  intended.  Here,  without  hesitation,  we 
were  obliged  to  stay,  though  without  any  baggage. 

Gravelly  Bun.  22nd.  — A  long  meeting;  felt  very  weary 
afterwards,  and  took  some  rest ;  but  amid  the  number  of 
Friends,  especially  young  people,  it  was  difficult  to  be  at  ease 
in  neglecting  them.  We  have  found  Rowland  Green  a  very 
agreeable  sensible  companion.  In  the  evening  the  Friends 
who  lodge  in  the  house  assembled  to  hear  a  chapter,  or  what 
else  might  be  communicated,  which  was  not  at  any  time  much; ' 
but  with  only  one  meeting  in  the  day,  and  a  large  party  col- 
lected, this  plan  seemed  especially  desirable. 

23rd. — Before  the  close  of  the  Yearly  Meeting  a  very 
solemn  covering  overspread  us.  In  a  short  supplication  and 
a  few  words  afterwards,  the  meeting  ended  to  the  relief  and 
refreshment  of  my  soul,  and  the  countenances  of  our  little 
company  marked  that  their  hearts  had  been  softened  by  a 
portion  of  the  love  that  gathers  to  the  Head,  and  unites  its 
members  one  unto  another  in  Him. 

Returning  to  Baltimore,  H.  C.  Backhouse  remarks  : — 

27th. — I  went  to  the  meeting  in  doubt  aud  fear ;  but  it 
ended  comfortably,  and  I  believe  with  solemnity.  It  is  a 
meeting,  the  present  state  of  Avhich  peculiarly  interests  me. 
If  some  could  acknowledge  more  openly  what  they  are,  the 
law  and  the  testimony  would  be  truly  exalted  by  them ;  but 
the  burden-bearers  must  have  to  pass  through  many  dis- 
couragements, and  often  be  ready  to  faint.  There  is  a  strong 


142 


1832. 


45. 


tendency  to  compromise  with  the  world,  and  possibly  with 
their  near  neighbours. 

The  evening  meeting  at  the  Point  was  I  believe  satisfactory. 
I  did  feel  sitting  down  without  my  husband,  and  could  almost 
wonder  what  was  to  become  of  me,  not  having  a  word  to  say 
for  some  time,  but  at  last  there  was  enough  for  the  meeting. 
In  returning  home  I  felt  thankful  for  the  favours  of  the  day. 

From  New  York  she  writes  : — 

7th  of  6th  ?wo.— With  E.  Coggeshall,  J.  R.  Willis  and 
wife,  Samuel  Wood  and  his  wife,  went  to  the  Penitentiary. 
I  hope  our  visit  might  be  of  use ;  some  appeared  touched, 
and  all  were  quiet.  We  then  went  into  another  department, 
where  the  state  prisoners  were  confined.  These  seemed  to 
feel  our  visit  more  than  the  others,  and  took  our  hands 
afterwards  with  tears  in  their  eyes.  I  hope  the  Prison  Dis- 
cipline Society  have  plans  of  these  prisons  :  I  never  saw  any 
buildings  better  constructed  for  their  object. 

8th. — Went  to  the  almshouse  in  the  morning  with  Hannah 
Eddy,  E.  Coggeshall,  and  Samuel  Wood.  I  feared  it  was 
over  zeal,  but  felt  very  peaceful  afterwards. 

^  They  then  proceeded  to  Newport,  Rhode  Island,  to 
attend  the  Yearly  Meeting  for  New  England,  which  is 
held  there. 

10th. — A  formidable  day.  Went  to  Newport  meeting  in 
the  morning ;  spoke  a  few  words,  but  came  burdened  out  of 
this  large  assembly ;  if  I  was  wrong  it  was  from  the  honest 
fear  of  being  superficial. 

ISth. —  Meeting  of  ministers  and  elders,  in  which  I  relieved 
ray  mind  pretty  fully  on  perhaps  one  of  the  most  difiicult 
subjects  to  touch — that  of  gospel  ministry.  The  standard  to 
be  sure  is  high,  and  well  may  we  all  say  we  "  have  not 
attained.'" 

\4th. — At  Abigail  Robinson's,  and  enjoyed  a  quiet  company 
round  her  old-fashioned  tea  table.    She  told  us  that  she  had 


jfT.  45.] 


1832. 


143 


been  for  above  seventy  years  an  inhabitant  of  that  house ; 
everything  in  it  of  the  same  ancient  character.  She  seemed 
like  one  very  near  the  kingdom,  and  we  had  a  sweet  little 
sitting  with  her  and  her  old  servants.  On  taking  leave,  she 
expressed  the  comfort  that  our  visits  had  been  to  her. 

I7th. — At  three  o'clock  was  an  appointed  public  meeting, 
in  which  I  was  enabled,  after  a  pretty  long  silence,  to  declare 
the  truth,  to  the  relief  of  my  own  mind.  It  must  be  some- 
thing more  than  natural  strength  that  could  thus  enable  me 
to  labour  when  truly  I  know  myself  weak  without  it. 


144 


1833. 


[iET.  45. 


CHAPTER  X. 

ESTABLISHES    FIRST-DAY    SCHOOLS    IN    NEW    ENGLAND,  NANTUCKET,^ 

NEW    BEDFORD  VISIT    TO    AN    INDIAN    SETTLEMENT  JONATHAN 

backhouse's  RETURN  AND  LABOURS  MEETING  WITH  THE  LEGIS- 
LATURE. 

From  this  time  until  the  middle  of  the  following 
year,  her  labours  were  confined  chiefly  within  the  limits 
of  Sandwich  Quarterly  Meeting,  of  which  Nantucket 
forms  a  part.  Her  mind  was  particularly  attracted 
towards  the  little  company  of  Friends  residing  on  this 
Island,  visiting  them  in  their  meetings  and  families 
again  and  again.  Among  those  who  were  not  members 
of  her  own  Society,  her  labours  were  also  abundant, 
and  especially  was  she  interested  for  a  class  in  New 
England  who  had  imbibed  what  were  termed  "  New 
Light"  views,  paying  religious  visits  to  them  in  their 
own  houses,  and  holding  many  meetings  with  them. 
The  fruit  of  these  labours  was  even  then  apparent,  in 
setthng  the  minds  of  many  in  sounder  views  of  doctrine 
and  practice. 

But  perhaps  the  most  important  feature  of  tliis  visit 
was  the  establishment  of  the  schools  for  instruction  in 
the  Scriptures  (on  the  plan  that  had  been  adopted  in 
Indiana).  She  used  to  have  the  children  and  their 
parents  assembled  in  the  Meeting-house,  when  she 
frequently  addressed  them  in  a  solemn  and  impressive 
manner,  on  the  vast  importance  of  acquiring  a  thorough 
knowledge  of  that  blessed  volume,  "  which  is  able  to 
make  wise  unto  salvation  through  faith  that  is  in  Christ." 
Her  concern  on  this  subject  was  cordially  united  with 
by  the  Friends  of  the  different  Monthly  Meetings 


45.]  1832.  1  t5 

Avhere  they  were  introduced.  Many  of  these  schools 
have  been  kept  up  and  have  been  productive  of  much 
good. 

Of  one  of  these  occasions  she  writes  thus  : — 

Nantucket,  22nd  of  7th  mo. — A  day  to  be  thankful  for. 
Besides  the  morning  and  afternoon  meetings,  I  had  the 
children  and  young  people  assembled,  and  endeavoured  to 
shew  tliem  the  importance  of  becoming  more  acquainted 
with  the  Scriptures ;  proposing  at  the  same  time  the  establish- 
ment of  a  school  on  a  First-day.  It  was  a  time  of  interest, 
and,  low  as  I  was  at  the  beginning  of  this  day,  I  felt  at  the 
end  of  it  that  the  Sun  of  Righteousness  had  arisen  with 
healing  on  his  wings. 

The  natural  features  of  the  island,  w^hose  inhabitants 
had  so  much  interested  her,  are  thus  described  in  her 
journal  :— 

Nantucket  is  a  desert  of  sand,  with  a  few  large  ponds  in  it, 
around  which  there  is  some  fertility  of  soil.  The  town  is 
rich,  loves  itself,  and  well  it  is  that  it  does,  for  no  one  else 
loves  it. 

The  whale  and  cod  fisheries  are  the  principal  trade,  and 
the  origin  of  the  wealth  of  the  place.  The  whales  were  first 
caught  near  the  island,  and  boats  were  sufficient  to  search 
after  them  ;  small  vessels  soon  succeeded,  and  pursued  them 
100  miles  from  the  shore.  The  voyage  gradually  extended 
as  the  whales  fled  from  their  pursuers,  and  now  they  make 
voyages  into  the  Pacific  and  Southern  Oceans,  which  occasion 
them  absences  of  three  or  four  years  from  their  families,  and 
a  bad  eff'ect  such  separation  seems  to  have  on  most  concerned 
in  it.  The  young  people,  and  generally  speaking  the  in- 
habitants, are  more  than  commonly  good-looking,  and  I 
think  intelligent  also.  I  have  no  doubt  our  Society  there  was 
at  one  time  in  a  very  flourishing  state,  and  what  was  wanting 
in  temporals  the  inhabitants  made  up  in  spirituals;  but  unless 
better  days  arise,  the  city  that  is  and  has  been  full  of  people 

L 


1^6  1832.  [.CT.  45. 

will  most  likely  sit  solitary  and  be,  like  her  land,  a  barren 
waste.  But  why  any  place  flourishes  and  why  it  declines  is 
often  difficult  to  ascertain;  perhaps  it  is  more  in  the  disposition 
of  the  inhabitants  than  from  local  advantages,  and  that 
disposition  often  takes  its  rise  from  some  leading  individuals; 
so  that  we  may  see  how  even  the  five  faithful  men  may  save 
a  city,  and  more  than  five  I  trust  there  are  in  this.  I  cannot 
but  believe  that  the  more  equal  distribution  of  the  good 
things  of  this  world  in  this  country  than  in  our  own  tends 
to  its  general  prosperity  and  happiness — less  of  eiinui  on  the 
one  handj  or  of  inordinate  labour  on  the  other.  The  almost 
total  absence  of  extreme  poverty,  excepting  in  the  gi-eat  cities, 
or  in  consequence  of  gross  misconduct,  is  certainly  a  relief  to 
be  felt.  It  is  indeed  a  fine  and  magnificent  country.  "When 
we  contemplate  its  almost  inexhaustible  resources, — its  noble 
streams,  carrying  with  such  facility  the  wealth  and  industry 
of  one  part  to  another,  its  freedom  from  taxation,  the  great 
fertility  of  the  soil  in  many  parts,  the  coal,  the  salt,  and  the 
iron  in  others,  the  very  rapid  increase  of  population,  and 
with  it  the  astonishing  growth  and  increase  of  their  cities — 
truly  we  may  say,  it  is  a  land  of  wonders  ! 


To  

New  Bedford,  11th  of  9th  mo.,  1832. 

My  Beloved  Priend, 

•  Thy  letter  has  particularly  interested  my  best 

feelings.  I  crave  thy  enlargement  in  the  love  and  power  of 
the  gospel.  It  has  long  been  my  persuasion  that  nothing  but 
faithfulness  can  set  thee  free  from  thy  many  cumbers,  and 
give  thee  the  aboundings  of  that  love  and  peace  that  alone 
can  delight  thee.  I  am  not  jealous  of  the  integrity  of  thy 
heart  as  far  as  thou  knowest  it  thyself ;  but  who  can  know  it  ? 
May  all  thy  fears  of  going  before  thy  Guide  be  tried  by  Him 
who  alone  can  show  unto  man  what  his  thought  is.  Is  it  not 
in  John  Churchman's  journal  that  a  very  good  lesson  is  given 
to  those  who  have  long  been  servants  in  the  Master's  family — 
that  the  gentlest  pointing  of  his  finger  manifests  his  will  as 


yKV.  45.] 


1832. 


147 


distinctly  to  tliese  as  his  loudest  commands  to  those  who  are 
\inaccustomed  to  his  voice  ? 

Since  my  hcloved  husband  left  me,  I  have  been  favoured 
with  a  very  agreeable  companion  in  E.  Kirkbride,  whose  early 
habits,  natural  temperament,  and  religious  experience,  render 
her  peculiarly  congenial  to  my  taste.  This  is  indeed  a  favour, 
when  we  have  to  be  so  much  and  intimately  together. 
Diu'ing  this  time,  I  have  had  as  deep  plunges  as  perhaps  I 
ever  had  in  my  life,  and  as  close  service,  till  I  almost  despaired 
of  life.  This  has  been  principally  in  visiting  the  families  of 
Friends  in  Nantucket  and  New  Bedford,  The  detention  has 
been  very  great,  but  T  believe  not  more  than  has  been  required; 
yet  a  long  tarriance  in  any  one  place  is  peculiarly  trying, 
though  Friends  are  very  kind.  I  have  been  sometimes  ready 
to  envy  Paul  his  own  hired  house. 

New  Bedford,  12lh  of  9th  mo.,  1832. 

We  have  visited  the  families  in  this  place,  and 
have  had  some  deeply  interesting  meetings,  at  which  most  of 
those  who  had  formerly  been  members  were  present.  I 
believe  I  may  say  that  out  of  weakness  I  was  made  strong. 
Friends  are  very  kind,  and  so  are  those  who  once  were 
Friends.  I  am  often  very  weary,  but  on  Second-day  morning 
I  felt  sweetly  refreshed.  The  day  before  had  been  truly 
exercising — a  very  large  public  meeting  in  the  evening,  to 
which  I  had  especially  invited  those  who  had  formerly  been 
members,  and  who  had  lost  their  right  of  membership.  Many 
came  who  had  not  attended  a  meeting  for  some  years  past.  It 
was,  I  believe,  a  solemn  occasion.  I  expect  that  it  will  be  my 
duty  to  have  more  intercourse  with  them  before  I  leave, 
partly  perhaps  in  a  social  way. 

Amid  her  various  labours  of  love  for  the  souls  of  men, 
the  aborigines  of  this  country  were  not  forgotten.  A 
visit  to  one  of  their  settlements  on  Martha's  Vineyard, 
is  thus  described  by  E.  P.  Kirkbride  : — 

"  On  Sixth-day  morning  we  set  out  for  an  Indian  Settlement, 

L  2 


148 


1832. 


[iBT.  45. 


and  after  riding  twenty  miles  (part  of  the  road  rougher 
than  anything  I  had  seen  before),  stopped  at  an  Indian  hut 
for  refreshment;  but  everything  around  looked  so  uninviting 
that  we  were  not  a  little  pleased  to  see  their  minister  arrive 
with  a  cordial  invitation  to  repair  to  his  abode,  adding  that 
he  had  full  unity  with  all  the  faithful  servants  of  the  Lord. 
A  large  mimber  of  Indians  assembled  in  the  evening. 
H.  C.  Backhouse  addressed  them  very  appropriately,  and 
then  their  pastor  set  his  seal  to  her  communication,  hoping 
the  audience  would  profit  by  what  they  had  heard.  After 
he  took  his  seat,  an  Indian  (whose  health  is  fast  declining), 
in  the  most  soothing  and  melodious  voice  poured  forth  the 
grateful  feelings  of  his  heart,  expressing  his  thankfulness  that 
she  had  been  commissioned  by  the  Lord  to  come  among 
them.  He  said  that  his  days  on  earth  were  nearly  ended, — 
that  soon  his  spirit  would  return  to  God,  and  be  united  to  the 
just  of  every  people  and  every  tongue, — that  there  is  much  of 
suffering  in  the  world,  and  that  he  had  no  wish  to  stay  here ; 
but  he  hoped  his  brethren  would  treasure  up  the  counsel 
they  had  heard,  for  his  heart  told  him  that  it  came  from 
God." 

After  an  absence  of  seven  months,  Jonathan  Back- 
house returned  to  America  early  in  the  Twelfth  month,* 
with  certificates  from  Friends,  empowering  him  to  hold 
meetings  separately,  as  well  as  in  conjunction  with 
his  wife. 

They  now  frequently  separated,  J.  Backhouse  visiting 
the  more  distant  and  less  accessible  districts.  Several 
weeks  of  this  winter  were  spent  in  the  north-eastern 

*  His  passage  of  more  than  six  weeks  had  been  very  stormy,  not 
unattended  with  danger.  In  the  midst  of  one  of  the  fearful  gales  they 
encountered,  "  I  was,"  he  writes,  "  favoured  to  feel  very  quiet,  though 
our  situation  was  fearful."  At  another  time,  when  the  sea  was  riuining 
very  high,  he  went  on  deck,  and,  secured  by  a  rope,  gave  himself  up  to 
the  enjoyment  of  the  awful  and  magnificent  scene.  *  *  *  When 
the  weather  permitted,  Jonathan  Backhouse  assembled  the  cabin  and 
steerage  passengers  for  reading  and  wor.ship. 


iET.  45.] 


1832. 


149 


parts  of  New  England,  where  to  a  large  body  of  Friends 
in  a  remote  quarter  his  company  and  reHgious  labours 
were  peculiarly  acceptable. 

Whilst  in  the  neighbourhood  of  Sandwich,  H.  C.  Back- 
house and  E.  P.  Kirkbride  experienced  a  remarkable 
preservation,  which  is  recorded  by  the  latter  several 
years  after,  as  follows  : — 

"  Your  mother  had  felt  drawn  to  spend  the  night  in  the 
house  of  an  old  Friend,  who  lived  by  herself,  and  who  was 
not  at  all  in  the  habit  of  entertaining  visiters.  The  chamber 
which  she  introduced  us  into  was  very  cold,  and  as  the 
chimney  was  boarded  in,  we  asked  her  if  we  could  have  a 
pan  of  coals  placed  on  the  hearth,  to  which  she  replied  in 
the  affirmative,  and  accordingly  a  very  large  vessel  was  put 
in  the  room,  and  replenished  again  and  again  with  charcoal ; 
so  that  when  we  retired  for  the  night,  we  both  expressed 
surprise  that  she  had  succeeded  in  making  that  icy  apartment 
so  very  comfortable.  We  soon  fell  asleep,  being  no  doubt 
overcome  at  once  by  the  impure  atmosphere,  till  I  was  aroused 
by  your  dear  mother's  exclamation  that  she  was  fainting. 

"  I  sprang  out  of  bed,  found  my  way  to  the  washing-stand 
in  the  dark,  and  filled  a  glass  with  water ;  but  before  I  could 
reach  her  I  fell  upon  the  floor  wholly  insensible.  In  a  few 
moments,  no  doubt,  the  vital  spark  in  both  of  us  would 
have  been  completelj'  extinguished,  as  it  would  have  been 
impossible  to  revive  in  that  foul  air ;  but  the  uuslumbering 
Shepherd  of  Israel  was  watching  over  us,  and  in  tender 
mercy  averted  so  awful  a  catastrophe.  The  noise  I  made  in 
falling  awoke  our  aged  hostess,  and  taking  her  light  in  her 
hand,  she  came  up  to  our  chamber  door,  to  know  what  was 
the  matter ;  but  finding  all  was  silent,  she  thought,  as  she 
afterwards  said,  '  My  friends  are  asleep,  and  I  will  not 
disturb  them,'  and  attempted  to  go  to  the  attic  where  her 
servant  slept,  to  see  if  the  noise  proceeded  from  thence ;  but 
before  she  had  gone  far  her  steps  were  arrested,  and,  as  she 
said  herself,  she  felt  '  constrained  to  return  to  our  room,' 
where  on  opening  the  door  she  found  us  in  the  state  I  have 


150 


1833. 


[jet.  46. 


described,  entirely  insensible.  The  admission  of  fresh  air 
into  the  room  soon  restored  ns  to  consciousness  ;  but  it  was 
several  days  before  we  were  able  to  travel,  and  I  think  the 
whole  of  this  memorable  circumstance  was  blessed  to  our 
aged  and  awe-stricken  friend.  A  few  days  afterwards  we 
heard  of  three  little  children  in  the  neighbourhood,  who 
were  placed  in  a  room  with  a  charcoal  furnace,  and  perished 
in  a  very  few  hours." 

Second  Month  19th. — With  our  kind  friends  the  Rogers', 
and  two  others,  we  set  off  for  a  meeting  appointed  at  Hing- 
ham.  We  made  one  or  two  interesting  calls  on  their  afflicted 
neighbours,  and  arrived  just  in  time  for  the  meeting  at  two 
o'clock.  I  felt  much  wearied,  and  on  entering  a  very  large 
meeting-house  (the  first  erected,  it  is  said,  in  the  United 
States),  I  did  truly  feel  I  had  no  strength  of  my  own :  I  was 
afraid  my  fears  would  have  almost  overwhelmed  me.  After 
some  time  of  silence,  I  was  strengthened  to  rise  with  the 
text,  "  Blessed  are  the  pure  in  heart,"  and  to  show  forth 
from  Scripture  that  nothing  but  the  Christian  dispensation 
would  bring  about  this  purity.  It  was  a  Unitarian  Meeting- 
house. I  did  not  know  how  the  doctrine  could  be  borne. 
The  audience  were  very  kind  to  me  afterwards,  and  none 
more  than  the  minister,  who  seemed  quite  affected.  After- 
Avards,  a  lady  and  clergyman  called  upon  us,  and  pleasantly 
cautioned  me  against  speaking  too  loud  and  straining  my 
voice. 

20th. — I  remembered  the  advice  of  my  Hingham  friends, 
and  took  real  pains  with  the  modulation  of  my  voice,  greatly 
to  the  satisfaction  of  my  friends.  I  believe  it  was  truly  a 
good  meeting,  and  I  felt  very  peaceful  after  it,  and  had  such 
a  night's  rest  as  I  have  not  had  for  many  a  long  night,  and 
rose  truly  refreshed.  The  sun  seemed  to  shine  on  mind  and 
body. 

23rd. — A  meeting  at  Quincy,  at  two  o'clock,  in  an  elegantly 
fitted-up  Unitarian  meeting-house.  An  intelligent  audience 
appeared  satisfied  with  the  truths  proclaimed. 

Boston,  2Gih. — I  was  ushered  into  the  State  House  by 
llezekiah  Barnai'd,  and  placed  in  the  Speaker's  chair,  before 
1,000  people;  I  felt  it  not  a  little,  even  to  tears;  but  I 


yET.  46.] 


1833. 


151 


was  helped  through^  and  many  expressed  their  satisfaction 
afterwards.* 

1st  of  3rd  mo. — Meeting  at  Lynn — very  low — just  faith 
enough  to  appoint  a  public  meeting  for  the  afternoon,  which 
renewed  my  trust,  and  I  had  peace  afterwards. 

6th. — A  very  pleasant  ride  on  a  beautiful  afternoon  in  an 
open  sleigh.  Lodged  at  a  comfortable  inn  at  Newbury- 
port,  and  lost  the  sweet  peace  I  had  all  the  afternoon,  by  not 
speaking  to  some  young  men  sitting  round  a  fire,  just  before 
we  went  to  bed. 

Salem,  S^sf. — A  very  solemn  meeting  to  me.  I  believe  I 
was  enabled  to  tell  the  people  the  truth  of  their  states. 

Ist  of  4th  mo. — We  took  a  pleasant  ride  to  Nahant.  The 
evening  was  fine,  the  scenery  of  rock  and  water  good  to  the 
eye,  I  was  pleased  to  see  others  enjoy  it;  but,  unworthy  as  I 

*  In  allusion  to  these  meetings  E.  P.  Kirhhride  writes  : — 
"  Called  on  an  Episcopalian  minister,  who  came  to  see  us  soon  after 
our  arrival.  His  wife  had  some  acquaintance  among  Friends,  and  both 
were  cordially  polite  to  us.  Your  mother  gave  them  very  sweet  en- 
couragement, and  they  were  much  affected  by  it.  On  taking  leave  he 
said  : — '  Would  you  were  going  to  remain  among  us,  and  could  make  all 
Quincy  such  Friends  as  yourselves  !'  His  wife  observed  to  us,  she  '  felt 
rejoiced  that  Christ  had  once  at  least  been  preached  within  those 
Unitarian  walls  adding,  '  I  shall  never  forget  your  visit  here.'  Your 
mother  wishing  for  a  meeting  with  the  Legislative  body,  now  in  Boston, 
and  Friends  uniting  witli  her  in  it,  her  proposition  was  sent  in,  in 
writing,  unanimously  voted  for,  and  on  the  evening  of  Second-day  she 
had  a  truly  favoured  opportunity,  not  only  with  the  members,  but  also 
with  their  wives.  Many  expressed  their  satisfaction  afterwards,  and  some 
proposed  that  they  should  return  a  vote  of  thanks.  One  man,  who  had 
been  speaking  rather  lightly  of  the  meeting  on  the  day  before,  recalled 
what  he  had  said,  observing,  he  was  confident  that  'no  one  there  could 
help  feeling  the  stillness  and  solemnity.'  We  returned  to  Lynn,  and 
there  commenced  the  work  of  visiting  the  families  of  Friends.  Your 
mother  has  a  large  proportion  of  this  kind  of  service,  and  an  old  Friend 
remai'ked,  he  did  not  wonder  that  her  Master  kept  her  to  it,  she  was 
so  eminently  qualified  an  instrument.  A  call  we  made  a  day  or  two 
ago  corroborates  the  truth  of  this  remark.  We  went  into  the  house 
entire  strangers,  and  when  about  to  go,  your  mother  having  said  some 
very  close  and  striking  things,  the  man  begged  leave  to  ask,  in  Scripture 
words,  a  single  question  :— '  Sayest  thou  this  of  thyself,  or  did  another 
tell  it  thee  of  me  V  Being  assured  that  she  had  no  outward  know- 
ledge of  them,  that  even  their  very  name  was  yet  unknown  to  her, — 
he  answered, '  Well  !  I  am  satisfied  ;  the  visit  is  satisfactory.' " 


152 


1833. 


[mt.  46. 


am,  I  have  yet  uo  meat  but  to  do  my  Master's  will.  Made 
a  visit  or  two  afterwards,  while  my  dear  husband  had  a 
public  meeting,  which  brought  a  little  light  and  peace. 

3rd. — A  meeting  with  the  Friends  at  Lynn,  for  which  I 
ought  to  be  reverently  thankful,  and  trust  that  He  will  not 
utterly  forsake  me.  I  was  favoured  to  relieve  my  mind,  and 
the  power  of  truth  opened  our  hearts  toward  each  other. 

Jonathan  and  Hannah  C.  Backhouse  again  separated 
for  a  short  time  ;  the  former  to  attend  the  approaching 
Yearly  Meeting  in  Philadelphia,  the  latter  to  continue 
her  labours  in  New  England,  under  the  kind  and  indul- 
gent care  of  William  and  Anna  Jenkins 

— Made  a  few  visits.    Moses  Brown,  in  his  ninety-fifth 
year,  went  with  us. 

17th. — Took  a  pleasant  country  ride  with  dear  A.  Jenkins. 
Went  to  the  school  in  the  evening,  and  gave  the  children 
a  lecture  on  the  Bible  to  stimulate  them  to  study  it :  some 
comfort  to  me. 

llth  of  5th  mo. — Attended  a  meeting  appointed  by  Elizabeth 
Wing,  a  truly  substantial  Friend,  of  few  words  and  much 
spiritual  depth. 

12^/<. — Meetings  at  Smithfield  and  Uxbridge.  The  day 
ended  peacefully :  I  desire  to  be  thankful  for  this  calm. 

13///. — Again  yielded  to  visiting  families,  with  less  conflict 
than  usual.  Suffice  it  then  perhaps  to  say,  for  the  remainder 
of  this  week,  that  we  visited  family  after  family^  and  had  four 
or  five  public  meetings  in  the  evenings,  in  a  populous  cotton- 
spinning  neighbourhood.  The  Friends  received  us  kindly, 
and  the  people  heard  us,  I  suspect,  gladly;  for  they  were  very 
attentive.  We  lodged  at  several  different  houses ;  for  our 
labours  were  spread  over  many  square  miles. 

At  Luke  Aldridge's  and  Waldo  Earfs,  very  agreeable 
resting-places.  On  First-day  there  was  a  large  and  general 
assemblage ;  but  I  felt  it  best  to  leave  the  meeting  to  my  dear 
husband,  and  went  off  to  a  small  one  at  ]\Ieudon,  where  some 
poor  souls,  I  believe,  were  comforted.  During  these  visits 
we  have  had  the  valuable  company  of  Mary  Allen,  a  minister, 
a  woman  of  judgment,  talent,  and  principle.  Had  a  pretty 
good  meeting  among  Friends,  and  another  at  a  town  near. 


.♦vr.  16.]  183:5.  153 

No  wonder  that  1  am  kept  so  poor,  for  if  a  gleam  of  light 
and  comfort  comes  across  my  mind,  it  so  renovates  the  whole 
frame,  that  I  am  ready  to  think  all  tilings  possible.  I  was 
marvellously  helped  through  this  meeting,  and  the  people 
seemed  remarkably  ready  to  receive  the  word  spoken.  Next 
morning  made  a  few  calls,  and  my  dear  husband  joined  us 
in  the  evening. 

Qth  mo. — Went  to  Providence  to  attend  the  funeral  of 
Dr.  Toby^s  wife.  A  large  number  of  the  inhabitants  were 
present,  and  a  solemn  meeting  it  was.  Pleasant  to  find 
ourselves  at  William  Jenkins',  and  enjoy  their  company  and 
the  comforts  of  their  house,  after  some  days  spent  in  almost 
Indiana  fashion.  How  the  things  here  make  me  turn  my  mind 
to  my  own  dear  home  !  A  piece  of  well-cooked  wholesome 
meat  is  an  indulgence  you  are  not  yet  fully  aware  of. 

Home  people  and  home  things,  like  the  flesh-pots  of  Egypt, 
do  not  soon  lose  their  charms  :  how  often  I  think  of  them 
and  dream  of  them  !  perhaps  go  further  !  Had  I  not  a  com- 
panion to  whom  I  am  really  attached,  this  travel  would  have 
sometimes  seemed  to  me  almost  insupportable. 

Second-day.— A  meeting  at  Freetown,  and  most  comfortably 
lodged  at  David  Shove's.  I  have  not  seen  a  house  since  we 
have  been  in  America,  the  order  of  which  so  much  reminded 
me  of  my  dear  mother's — a  place  for  everything  and  every- 
thing in  its  place,  and  uncommonly  nice, — temporals  and 
spirituals  remarkably  combined.  Mary  Shove  and  her  agree- 
able husband  went  with  us  the  next  morning,  to  Taunton, 
where  we  had  a  meeting  with  a  few  scattered  Friends  and 
their  neighbours,  and  in  the  evening  a  very  large  one.  At 
Fall  river  we  attended  a  meeting  appointed  by  John  Warren, 
a  Friend  from  the  eastern  part  of  New  England.  It  Avas  a 
treat  to  me  to  hear  him  and  remain  silent.  Satisfied  with 
proposing  to  the  Friends  the  holding  of  a  First-day  scliool, 
in  which  John  Warren  very  much  united.  Went  on  next 
day  to  Tiverton,  at  another  meeting  of  his.  Came  to  Edward 
Wing's  too  weary  for  much  exertion,  and  now  with  a  broken 
axletree,  we  are  kept  on  the  road,  affording  the  opportunity  I 
have  long  wished  for  to  write  up  this  journal.  Now  I  may 
describe  the  general  features  of  the  country  we  have  been  in, 
which  is  truly  beautiful, — wood,  water,  hill  and  dale,  under 
a  beautifully  clear  atmosphere,  have  formed  scenery  in  which 


154 


1833. 


[^T.  46. 


my  eye  lias  delighted^  whilst  my  heart  has  been  sad.  The 
river  that  runs  to  Providence  through  Smithfield  has  many 
falls,  and  these  are  made  use  of  to  turn  mill  after  mill  for 
the  spinning  and  weaving  of  cotton ;  so  that  the  country  is 
peopled  by  many  manufacturers,  an  interesting  class  of 
people,  whose  ears  are  open  to  hear  every  new  thing,  and 
their  understandings  to  examine  them.  I  am  glad  of  beauty 
anywhere — much  I  have  seen  and  loved  :  but  when  may  I 
retire  to  my  own  spot  of  earth,  and  my  own  internal 
dominion — to  cultivate,  and  I  trust  enjoy  it  ? 

2Q)th. — At  George  Rowland's :  Susan  and  myself  occupied 
in  making  a  clear  statement  of  the  plan  of  the  [First-day] 
schools,  and  of  the  questions  to  be  used  in  it.  A  book  of 
directions,  and  questions  such  as  Friends  can  fully  approve, 
is  much  wanted,  and  I  was  glad  to  leave  the  carrying  out  of 
the  plan  in  the  hands  of  a  valuable  Friend,  who  is  interested 
in  the  subject.* 

29>th. — An  interesting  call  from  the  people  whom  it  was 
my  principal  object  to  see  at  New  Bedford. 

\st  of  7th  mo. — T\'e  passed  yesterday  pretty  comfortably.  I 
reminded  my  old  friends,  among  whom  I  have  laboured,  that 
darkness  had  gradually  overspread  the  Christian  world  by 
looking  to  man,  and  that  the  seed  of  this  error  had  early 
taken  root,  which  called  for  the  reproof  of  the  Apostle, — 
"  I  am  of  Paul,  I  of  Apollos,"  &c.    *    *    *  * 

J.  and  H.  C.  Backliouse  now  quitted  this  scene  of 
prolonged  and  arduous  labour,  and  turned  towards 
Canada.    Arrived  at  New  York,  the  latter  writes  :— 

Neiv  York,  2>rd. — At  the  Monthly  jNIeeting,  I  ventured 
into  the  men's  meeting,  to  propose  the  First-day  school  being 
under  the  care  of  a  committee  of  the  ^Monthly  Meeting. 
*  *  *  *  O  may  I  be  preserved,  moving  only  in  my  right 
allotment,  in  advocating  a  means  of  Scriptural  instruction, 
which  I  cannot  doubt  has  at  diflei-ent  times  had  the  Divine 
sanction  upon  it ! 

*  The  compilation  here  referred  to  was  made  and  printed  in  Phila- 
delphia in  1834,  under  the  title  of  "  Scriptural  Questions  for  the  use 
of  Schools." 


-fi".  4(5.] 


1833. 


155 


CHAPTER  XL 

VOYAGE    UP   THE    HUDSON     RIVER  ENTERS    CANADA  YONGE  STREET, 

YORK  MEETING  WITH  THE  GARRISON  E.  P.  KIRKBRIDe's  ILL- 
NESS NORWICH  SETTLEMENT  OF  DIFFERENCES. 

of  7th  mo. — Henry  Hull's  wife  took  us  eight  miles,  a 
hilly  and  beautiful  ride,  to  the  Friends'  school  at  Nine 
Partners, — the  Ackworth  of  New  York  Yearly  Meeting, — it 
was  a  committee  meeting.  I  examined  the  children  in  their 
knowledge  of  Scripture,  which  was  very  deficient.  A  few  weeks 
ago  thi'ee  whole  copies  of  Scriptures  were  all  that  were  to  be 
found  in  the  institution ;  lately,  at  the  instigation  of  a  Friend, 
five  more  have  been  introduced.  Surely  the  duty  of  being 
acquainted  with  the  Scriptures  has  not  stood  in  the  place  it 
ought,  and  the  neglect  of  those  writings  which  testify  of 
Jesus,  that  "  He  is  the  Christ,  the  son  of  the  living  God," 
has  laid  the  foundation  in  a  great  degree  for  the  unsound 
doctrines  which  have  been  so  lamentably  prevalent  in  this 
country.  I  think  the  feeling  in  a  district  thus  poisoned  is 
something  similar  to  being  in  a  slave  State — the  oppression 
of  the  enemy  under  a  different  form.  We  lodged  under  the 
agreeable  roof  of  Isaac  and  Anna  Thorn,  and  after  breakfast, 
in  a  very  solemn  manner,  he  supplicated  for  us  and  for  our 
children,  and  our  safe  return  to  them. 

14^/i. — A  very  large  meeting  at  Troy,  altogether  one  to  be 
thankful  for ;  many  spoke  affectionately  to  us  afterwards. 

LansingburgJi.  loth. — Another  public  meeting,  which  left 
me  poor,  and  how  many  I  made  rich,  questionable.  My  dear 
husband  had  also  a  meeting  at  a  village,  close  by. 


156  1833.  [mt.  46. 

From  Jonathan  Backhouse. 

Lansingburgh,  16th  of  7th  mo.,  1833. 

My  Dear  Children, 

Whilst  on  our  voyage  from  New  "York  to  Albany 
I  longed  for  you  to  enjoy  the  magnificent  scenery  which  the 
Hudson  river  discloses  to  view.  It  is  a  noble  stream  of  one 
or  two  miles  in  width,  running  through  a  deep  valley  ;  lofty 
banks  ornamented  with  wood,  neat  farm-houses,  gentlemen's 
seats,  and  pleasant  villages  interspersed  ;  the  cliffs  in  some 
places  bold  and  precipitous,  and  for  five  or  six  miles  the 
basaltic  rocks  are  almost  perpendicular ;  they  are  594  feet 
high,  and  are  called  the  Balustrades.  We  left  New  York  on 
the  4th,  came  forty-five  miles  by  water  to  Peekskill,  had  a 
meeting  there  that  evening,  and  on  Sixth-day  we  proceeded 
by  steam-boat  to  Poughkeepsie,  forty  miles  further  ;  passing 
through  what  are  termed  the  Highlands,  mountains  close  to  the 
river,  rising  boldly  from  the  margin  to  1,500  feet  in  height. 

The  tide  flows  160  miles  from  the  sea  to  Albany.  This  city 
is  the  capital  of  New  York  State,  the  seat  of  government, — a 
fine  town  containing  20,000  inhabitants.  The  City  Hall  is 
a  noble  building. 

We  return  to  the  journal : — 

17th. — Rose  early  and  went  to  the  Springs  [Saratoga],  the 
pleasantest  mineral  water  I  ever  tasted,  highly  saline  and 
impregnated  with  fixed  air.  *  *  *  *  It  is  curious  to  see 
the  M^ater  springing  up  out  of  a  conical  rock  about  three  feet 
high.* 

ISth. — A  beautiful  ride  to  a  meeting  six  miles  ofiF;  the 

*  From  E.  P.  Kirkbricle  : — "  We  spent  a  day  or  two  at  Saratoga 
Springs,  and  had  a  large  and  memorable  meeting  there.  Some  Jews 
were  present.  Before  leaving,  your  dearest  mother  took  a  few  tracts 
into  the  drawing-room,  saying  she  wished  to  give  them  to  the  Jews.  I 
was  afraid  they  would  not  be  well  received  ;  but  they  appeared  quite 
pleased  with  the  attention  :  indeed  there  was  so  great  a  demand  for 
them,  she  very  soon  got  rid  of  all  she  had." 


KT.  46.] 


1833. 


157 


Motts  and  other  Friends  kindly  accompanied  us.  The  poor 
Friends  appeared  very  glad  to  see  us :  they  are  left  few  in 
number,  their  meetings  having  been  so  desolated  by  Hicksism. 

A  long  ride  to  John's  Town^  where  a  meeting  of  many 
hundreds  was  at  an  hour's  notice  assembled. 

21*^ — Attended  the  small  meeting  of  Friends  at  Utica, 
and  a  time  of  refreshment  it  proved  to  me,  and  I  believe  to 
the  little  flock.* 

2^th. — A  cordial  reception,  and  a  meeting  in  the  Presby- 
terian meeting-house  at  Auburn,  proved  a  confirmation  of 
faith  that  was  at  a  low  ebb. 

27111. — Visited  the  prison  at  Auburn.  The  prisoners,  700 
or  800,  at  breakfast.  Afterwards  went  to  see  them  work.  The 
order  and  excellence  of  the  regulations  were  very  interesting. 
Finding  no  opportunity  for  religious  communication  could  be 
had  with  them  in  the  week,  too  hastily  gave  it  up,  and 
went  on  to  Scipio ;  but  my  mind  was  so  burdened  that  we 
returned  to  Auburn,  and  next  morning,  at  half-past  six,  after 
they  had  breakfasted^  had  a  very  interesting  opportunity  with 
them.  Then  went  to  our  two  appointed  meetings  near  Scipio, 
which  were  got  through  comfortably ;  many  Hicksites  present, 
and  many  Gospel  truths  declared.  Lodged  at  the  very 
comfortable  abode  of  Humphrey  Rowland. 

2Qth. — Called  on  an  interesting  family,  great  botanists,  who 
had  many  flowers  in  their  garden,  and  on  Susannah  Marriot, 
an  English  maiden  dame  of  very  good  repute  for  sense, 
benevolence,  and  sound  faith.    *    *    *  * 

We  are  truly  in  a  magnificent  country,  the  energy  of  its 
inhabitants  marked  by  rapid  improvements,  and  already 
excellent  towns  and  villages  prove  that  no  tithes,  no  war 
debts  to  pay,  and  no  feudal  tenures,  are  a  marvellous  relief  to 
the  land.  One  thing  I  often  remark, — that  the  courteousness 
of  the  mass  of  the  inhabitants  is  greatly  superior  to  that  of  the 
English,  less  noisy  speaking,  fewer  vulgar  tones  and  accents. 

^ith  of  Sth  mo. — Inexpressibly  fearful  of  another  meeting 
appointed  at  Ithaca  this  evening ;  my  faith  renewed,  and  my 

*  Of  this  meeting  E.  P.  K.  writes: — "Your  dearest  mother  dwelt 
with  unusual  power  and  clearness  on  doctrinal  points,  and  we  were 
told  afterwards  that  a  Hicksite  minister  who  had  been  zealously 
promulgating  their  views  was  present." 


1833. 


[.ET.  IG. 


body  with  it  strengthened  in  a  meeting  witli  some  nice 
Friends  and  others  at  Hector,  and  in  the  evening  a  very  large 
meeting  at  Ithaca,  and  one  of  the  most  satisfactory  I  have 
often  had.  The  Baptist  minister  afterwards  publicly  asked,  if 
we  would  not  have  another  meeting  and  religious  opportunity 
in  his  family,  which  my  husband  declined.  Verily  I  think 
the  world  is  fast  acknowledging  our  principles,  or  thej'' 
would  not  listen  so  attentively.  In  a  few  places  they  refuse 
women's  preaching ;  yet  it  is  but  rarely  they  do  so ;  the 
ministers  are  too  dependent  upon  the  people,  and  the  people 
receive  it  [women's  preaching]  willingly. 

6th. — Rode  to  Farmington ;  a  hard  day's  work ;  some  exer- 
cise of  mind  and  travelling  many  miles  over  a  bad  road.  A 
violent  thunderstorm,  in  which  a  tree  was  struck  half-a-mile 
from  the  place  where  we  took  shelter. 

7th. — A  large  meeting  in  the  morning  in  the  Friends' 
Meeting-house,  many  Friends  and  others  present.  I  was 
helped  out  of  much  weariness  to  preach  the  Gospel.  Kindly 
entertained  at  Asa  Smith's. 

Sth. — Caleb  Macumber,  an  interesting  and  original  char- 
acter, and  admirable  minister,  was  with  us :  his  kindness  and 
sympathy  have  been  truly  valuable  to  me.  He  is  a  man  of 
strong  natural  sense  and  full  of  pithy  anecdotes ;  roughness 
itself  in  exterior;  under  other  circumstances,  Johnson  or  Parr 
would  not  have  outdone  him.  A  Friend  of  his  meeting  said 
he  frequently  speaks,  but  he  never  knew  two  sermons  at  all 
similar.  I  thought  of  my  dear  father,  whom  he  was  not 
wholly  unlike  in  countenance.  Speaking  of  ministry  and  his 
own  experience,  he  said,  "  I  should  be  ready  to  question  its 
authority  if  the  same  thing  occurred  again;"  but  all  are  not  to 
expect  that  newness  of  idea  is  always  to  accompany  newness 
of  life. 

'[2th. — At  Rochester,  a  very  large  meeting  in  the  Methodist 
Meeting-house.  Hardly  alive,  from  fatigue ;  but  the  meeting, 
I  believe,  not  injured  by  it. 

— Went  on  to  Hartas  Hedley's  at  Wheatland,  one  of 
the  most  agreeable  Friends'  meetings  I  have  been  at. 

17th. — Another  large  meeting  at  Rochester.  If  I  had 
more  satisfactorily  taken  leave  of  our  kind  young  hosts,  I 
think  I  should  have  left  Rochester  with  a  light  heart. 

2Brcl. — Arrived  at  Niagara  just  before  sunset,  and  in  time 


.Kv.  46.] 


1833. 


159 


for  a  view  of  tlie  Falls  from  the  Table  rock,  and  by  moonlight 
also.* 

24th. — Seeing  the  Falls  all  day  from  both  sides. 

2dth.~Tiose  early  and  arrived  in  time  for  the  Select 
Meeting  in  Yonge  Street.  In  bed  the  rest  of  the  day  : 
found  a  kind  and  helpful  friend  in  Margaret  Wright. 

1st  of  9th  mo.,  First-day. — Too  ill  to  go  to  meeting.  I 
somewhat  enjoyed  the  rest  from  labour ;  yet  illness  with  poor 
accommodation  at  such  a  distance  from  home  is  no  small  trial. 

2nd. — Made  one  call  in  the  evening.  Had  the  children 
together  for  the  sake  of  Bible  instruction. 

Zi'd. — Took  leave  of  our  kind  friends,  made  a  call  or  two  on 
our  way,  and  came  to  Whitchurch.  Attended  their  meeting  : 
felt  very  weak  and  poorly,  but  had  the  children  together  on 
Bible  instruction  in  the  evening. 

8i/i. — A  morning  of  trial :  my  heart  is  sore :  some  little 
refreshment  in  the  meeting  with  Friends.  Afterwards  went 
to  David's  Town,  to  visit  a  people  that  had  separated  from 
Friends  under  David  Wilson,  whose  principles  and  practices 
appear  to  be  of  the  worst  kind.  Several  hundreds  came  to 
the  meeting. 

Wth. — Made  more  visits,  one  on  David  Wilson.  Thought 
of  what  Paul  said  to  Elymas,  and  partly  repeated  it.  Came 
to  James  Pearson's  pretty  peacefully. 

\2th. — Attended  the  Monthly  Meeting,  perhaps  I  may  say 
had  some  good  service  therein,  particularly  about  establishing 
First-day  schools. 

*  Of  this  occasion  her  companion  lurites : — 

"  On  our  way  to  Canada  we  spent  a  few  days  at  the  falls  of  Niagara, 
and  I  shall  not  soon  forget  the  lively  interest  which  thy  dear  mother 
manifested  in  this  truly  sublime  and  wonderful  spectacle  ;  it  seemed 
so  adapted  to  the  dejith  and  breadth  of  her  capacious  and  powerful 
understanding.  But  she  was  not  idle  even  here.  Several  meetings  for 
worship  were  held  with  the  motley  groups  who  frequent  these  spots  of 
interest:  some  of  them  were  favoured  seasons.  She  had  no  idea  of 
pleasure  in  opposition  to  duty  ;  but  when  she  could  combine  the  two 
things,  as  in  the  present  instance,  no  one  could  have  a  keener  relish  for 
innocent  enjoyment. 

Looking  habitually  through  nature  up  to  nature's  God,  the  language 
of  her  spirit  seemed  to  be — 

"  Thus  wondrous  fair, 
Thyself  how  wondrous  then." 


160 


1833. 


[.CT.  46. 


I5th. — Two  good  meetings  ;  one  with  the  Friends  of  Youge 
Street,  and  another,  a  full  one,  with  the  people.  A  bright 
gleam  afterwards,  but  paying  a  visit  in  the  impatience  to  get 
done  brought  a  cloud  over  my  mind  and  was  too  much  for 
my  strength. 

23rf?. — Fourteen  miles  of  very  rough  travel,  and  a  most 
beautifully  fine  day  we  had  for  it ;  but  felt  it  a  close  trial 
to  be  thus  sent  into  the  woods  and  again  to  have  to  put  up 
my  curtain  in  a  log  cabin. 

24th. — Left  my  dear  husband  at  York  [now  more  generally 
known  by  the  name  of  Toronto] ,  to  attend  meetings  in  the 
neighbourhood.  Before  we  parted  I  felt  bound  on  bended 
knee  to  beg  preservation,  craving  that  if  for  the  sake  of  the 
souls  of  men  we  were  to  be  separated,  we  might  walk  worthy 
of  our  high  vocation.  These  are  trials,  but  all  must  again 
and  again  be  given  up. 

27th. — An  interesting  reading  meeting  with  some  young 
men  Friends.  The  reading  of  the  day,  Samuel  Neale's  journal 
in  America,  suited  my  poor  tried  soul.  In  the  afternoon, 
another  meeting  in  the  Methodist  meeting-house,  much  more 
relieving  than  the  last ;  but  it  is  a  place  in  which  there  seems 
much  in  array  against  vital  religion.  Afterwards  went  to  see 
some  poor  children  of  the  neighbourhood,  among  whom  the 
young  men  hope  to  establish  a  First-day  school. 

Yo7'k,  29th. — Yesterday  was  a  trial  of  faith  [alluding  to 
her  concern  for  holding  a  meeting  with  the  soldiers  of  the 
garrison] .  The  commanding  officer  gave  me  leave  to  have  a 
meeting  with  as  many  of  the  garrison  as  wished  to  come, 
and  was  himself  present.  It  was  truly  an  awful  engagement 
but  it  ended  to  my  relief.  The  Commander  aftei'wards  ex- 
pressed his  satisfaction,  as  did  many  of  the  officers  and 
their  wives.  I  endeavoured  to  make  no  more  of  my  feelings 
than  I  could  help,  but  this  engagement  did  cost  me  some- 
thing. To  preach  Christianity  faithfully  among  soldiers  and 
not  offend  did  seem  difficult ;  but  I  may  thankfully  say  I  was 
helped  to  do  it.  We  returned  from  the  barracks  about  six 
o'clock,  and  after  tea  Isaac  Hammer  spent  an  hour  or  two 
very  pleasantly  with  us. 

29fh. — Took  the  steam-boat  to  Hamilton  ;  but  my  mind, 
though  not  sorely  distressed  as  it  had  sometimes  been  on 


-ET.  46.] 


1833. 


101 


similar  occasions,  had  not  sufficient  evidence  of  being-  right, 
thoroughly  to  enjoy  the  interesting  letters  from  home  which 
had  been  put  into  my  hands  upon  going  on  board.  A  little 
more  patience,  and  I  believe  I  should  have  had  a  very  peace- 
ful release. 

Slst. — Quite  ill  in  the  morning — a  very  severe  headach — 
low  in  mind.  Ventured  to  appoint  a  meeting  in  the  evening, 
which  was  satisfactory,  and  my  poor  soul  was  cheered. 

4i/i  of  11th  mo. — A  long  ride  over  very  bad  roads  in  the 
dark,  to  a  house  in  which  the  accommodation  was  very  low  ; 
for,  oh  !  to  sleep  in  a  small  room — men,  women,  and  children 
■ — is  oppressive ;  especially  when  body,  soul,  and  spirit  seem 
all  in  like  condition. 

6th. — Turned  back  six  miles  to  hold  a  meeting  at  Levi  " 
"Wilson's,  which  was  a  large  and  very  satisfactory  one,  bringing 
some  light  and  peace  into  my  mind,  encouraging  to  do  what 
my  hands  find  to  do. 

8th. — Went  to  a  meeting  appointed  near ;  night  dark  and 
rainy ;  my  mind  has  not  often  been  more  enlarged  on  gospel 
truths,  nor  have  I  felt  more  ability  to  declare  them. 

12th. — In  the  afternoon  had  several  children  collected,  who 
took  much  interest  about  the  First-day  school. 

The  following  are  extracts  from  letters  written  at 
this  time  — 

To  HER  SON  Henry. 

We  are  again  going  from  log-cabin  to  log- 
cabin,  and  seeing  multitudes  of  unlettered  children.  We 
have  felt  unusually  interested  about  them,  in  a  little 
meeting  near  this  place,  in  which  I  think  there  must  be  a 
hundred,  in  not  much  more  than  ten  families.  You  have 
indeed  great  advantages :  most  of  these  poor  children  can 
barely  read  intelligibly,  and  are  very  ignorant  of  the  Sci'ip- 
tures.  They  are  many  of  them  very  good-looking,  with  fine 
curly  hair  and  bright  black  eyes ;  hands  as  brown  as  an 
Indian's,  feet  bare,  and  of  the  same  complexion.  I  am  per- 
suaded there  is  a  labour  for  the  mind  that  as  much  conduces 
to  its  health,  as  labour  for  the  body ;  but  there  may  be 
too  much,  which  only  makes  it  weak.    I  have  always  desired 

M 


102 


1833. 


for  thee^  my  dear  child^  that  thou  mayest  be  industrious,  but 
I  have  never  wished  thee  to  overwork  tliyself.  Some  can  bear 
more  personal  exertion  than  others ;  and  so  it  is  with  the 
mind :  if  we  do  our  share  according  to  our  abilities,  it  is  all 
that  can  be  expected  of  us,  and  we  need  not  fret  oui'selves 
because  those  of  stronger  power  can  do  more ;  for  surely, 
thougli  learning  is  desirable,  well-regulated  dispositions  of 
mind  are  more  so. 

To  THE  Same. 

I  am  glad  you  are  so  comfoi'table  at  school, 
and  have  such  a  kind  master  and  mistress.  Dost  thou  ever 
bring  her  any  flowers  out  of  thy  garden  ?  Little  attentions 
of  that  kind  are  pleasing,  and  show  gratitude  for  greater 
kindnesses.  I  have  always  liked  the  story  of  Fido,  in 
Evenings  at  Home.  Little  things  may  often  bring  very  im- 
portant consequences.  "  For  want  of  a  nail  the  shoe  was 
lost,  for  want  of  a  shoe  the  horse  was  lost,  and  for  want  of  a 
horse  the  man  was  lost," — so  poor  Richard  says.  We  must 
be  careful  of  little  things ;  it  is  the  pence  that  make  the 
pound.  So  I  hope  thou  wilt  begin  by  doing  right  in  little 
things,  and  greater  will  follow.  I  consider  dress  to  be  a 
little  thing,  and  yet  our  appearance  altogether  has  a  decided 
efl"ect  on  the  mind  and  character.  If  we  attend  too  much  to 
it,  it  makes  us  trifling,  and  if  too  little,  disorderly  and  dis- 
agreeable ;  so  I  hope  thou  wilt  keep  the  happy  medium. 

To  HER  YOUXGEST  SoX. 

Norwich,  12tU  of  11th  mo.,  1833. 

*  *  *  *  I  am  glad  grandmamma  gave 
thee  a  plane.  I  used  to  be  very  fond  of  using  carpenter's 
tools,  and  I  should  like  my  little  son  (though  I  suppose  he 
has  grown  a  tall  boy  now),  to  be  able  to  use  them  well.  We 
never  can  tell  what  may  be  our  allotment  in  life,  and  know- 
ledge of  all  kinds  we  one  time  or  other  generally  find  a  use 
for.  I  should  like  thee  to  read  the  story  of  the  gentleman 
and  the  basket-maker,  in  Sandford  and  Merton ;  I  have 
sometimes  been  reminded  of  it  since  I  came  into  this  country, 
cir  rather  the  rougher  parts  of  it.    In  Philadelphia  and  the 


.HT.  4G  ] 


1833. 


163 


great  towns  we  live  much  as  we  do  in  England ;  but  here  we 
had  much  better  know  liow  to  cut  down  a  tree  than  to  dravi 
it  most  beautifully. 

Dear  "  papa"  left  us  two  weeks  ago,  and  I  have  not  heard 
if  he  attended  Carolina  Yearly  Meeting.  I  hope  he  may 
be  back  again  shortly.  I  think  of  you  night  and  day,  and 
do  feel  it  a  very^  very  long  absence ;  but  I  believe  it  my  duty 
yet  to  be  here ;  so  if  we  all  try  to  do  right,  I  hope  some  day 
we  may  all  be  happy  together  again.  We  travel  over  very 
rough  roads  ;  but  if  we  remain  much  longer  in  this  part  of  the 
countr^'^j  we  hope  to  have  sleighing,  which  will  make  it  much 
easier  to  get  along,  but  I  should  be  glad  to  be  excused  from 
spending  a  winter  in  Canada.  I  do  not  like  Canada  so  well 
as  the  United  States,  though  they  are  much  alike ;  yet  there 
does  not  seem  quite  the  same  energy  among  the  inhabitants, 
and  more  poor-looking  people  in  the  great  towns,  in  conse- 
quence of  the  numbers  of  Irish  that  come  over  in  great 
wretchedness. 

We  have  met  some  Indians  on  the  road  with  their  blankets 
on  their  shoulders.  I  missed  seeing  those  Indians  who  have 
been  under  the  care  of  Peter  Jones  ;  but  I  held  a  meeting  in 
the  log-house  of  his  father,  who  has  obtained  a  large  tract  of 
land  by  marrying  four  Indian  wives.   *    *    *  * 

Farewell,  my  very  dear  child.  I  am  glad  to  hear  that  thou 
art  a  good  boy,  and  I  hope  thou  wilt  continue  to  be  so. 

Thy  very  affectionate  mother, 

H.  C  Backhouse. 

To  HER  Daughters. 

I  am  pleased  you  like  attending  the  Yearly 
Meeting :  let  us  take  home  all  that  belongs  to  us,  and  leave 
the  rest.    *    *    *  * 

I  advise  you  not  to  perplex  yourselves  about  the  various 
views  of  right  and  wrong  in  things  not  immediately  your  own 
business  :  study  to  be  quiet  and  to  mind  that,  and  then,  after 
much  experience,  your  senses  may  be  exercised  to  discern 
between  good  and  evil  in  things  relating  to  others.  But  it  is 
generally  safest,  especially  in  early  life,  to  form  no  judgment 
on  things  that  do  not  especially  concern  us. 

M  2 


164 


1833. 


[jet.  46. 


To  . 

*  *  *  *  Though  much  suffering  has  been 
my  portion  in  this  land,  I  have  to  acknowledge  many  mercies ; 
and  many  hours  in  which  the  truths  and  joys  of  Christianity 
have  been  sealed  more  deeply  on  my  mind  than  at  any  other 
period  of  my  life.  Domestic  life  appears  to  be  sometimes 
almost  too  great  a  comfort  to  be  allowed  in  this  world ;  so 
long  separated  from  it,  I  may  forget  that  it  also  has  its 
toils,  trials,  and  temptations.    *    *    *  * 

It  is  very  trying  to  me  to  be  so  unusually  detained  from 
place  to  place ;  it  brings  mind  and  body  low,  I  can  assure 
you  ;  but  I  feel  so  peaceful  after  my  day's  work  this  evening, 
that  I  am  again  willing  to  cast  myself,  my  cares,  and  all  that 
is  dearest  to  me,  on  Him,  who  we  may  surely  acknowledge 
has  cared  for  us,  and  leave  our  times  in  his  hands,  trusting 
that  He  will  be  pleased  to  order  all  things  rightly.  It  is  no 
small  trial  to  be  again  without  your  dear  father ;  but  I  have 
often  thought  that  if  we  are  not  separated  now,  he  will  have 
to  come  back  and  finish  his  work  when  mine  is  over.  If  we 
follow  in  faith  we  must  not  regard  anything  before  the  voice 
of  our  Master,  trusting  that  He  will  not  put  upon  us  a  burden 
w^hich  He  will  not  enable  us  to  bear. 

To  return  to  the  journal. 

13^A.— The  Monthly  Meeting  [of  Norwich].  In  that  for 
discipline  my  school  business  was  introduced.  Wearied  ai 
I  am  with  a  tale  so  often  told,  the  manner  of  its  reception 
and  the  feeling  that  accompanies  it  sometimes  surprises  me. 
Perhaps  these  schools  may  be  the  most  lasting  fruit  of  my 
toils  !  I  also  mentioned  my  view  of  visiting  families,  which  was 
very  cordially  received. 

24<th,  First-day. — A  good  meeting  in  the  morning  and  one 
in  the  evening  at  the  Methodist  meeting-house.  My  soul 
enjoyed  light  and  peace  this  day. 

Ist  of  12th  mo. — ^Paid  a  visit  to  the  school,  which  was  cheer- 
ing, and  the  children  said  their  lessons  with  spirit. 

Leaving  Norwich,  they   travelled   in   waggons  to 


a;t.  46.]  1833.  105 

Burford.  Here  H.  C.  Backliouse  parted  with  her  kind 
companion  and  elder,  James  Brown,  his  health  not 
permitting  him  to' bear  the  hardships  and  difficulties 
they  had  to  encounter. 

4tk. — A  small  meeting  with  the  Indians  at  Captain  Brant's* 
an  Indian  chief.  Afterwards  decided  to  hold  another  meeting 
at  Brantford,  which  was  a  comfortable  one,  bringing  light 
and  peace  into  my  poor  soul  that  had  had  little  of  it  manj'^ 
days.    Too  hastily  appointed  a  meeting  at  Mount  Pleasant. 

5th. — This  meeting  one  of  the  most  trying  to  my  deepl)^- 
tried  mind.  After  sitting  some  time  in  silence  I  ventured  to 
kneel  down ;  but  this  not  relieving  me,  I  yielded  to  a  pre- 
vioiis  suggestion  to  break  up  the  meeting  and  appoint  one 
for  the  evening.  It  was  a  close  trial :  possibly  I  might  have 
spoken  and  finished  with  the  place,  bad  or  good,  but  I  have  a 
dread  of  going  too  far  and  not  preaching  in  the  life.  Oh, 
that  I  might  be  able  to  hit  the  mark  in  this  most  important 
office  of  a  gospel  minister,  and  know  the  time  of  silence  as 
well  as  that  of  speech  If    In  the  evening  many  came. 

9th. — Ready  to  faint  under  the  trial  and  exercise  of  the 
day,  and  as  dear  E.  K.  was  too  ill  to  accompany  me,  I  took  a 
woman  who  was  sewing  at  the  inn  with  me  in  our  waggon.  It 
was  a  meeting  which  very  much  relieved  my  mind,  and  brouglit 
that  ray  of  light  and  peace  into  my  soul,  for  the  love  of  which 
great  are  the  hardships  and  trials  I  endure. 

10th. — My  mind  not  being  free  from  the  place  we  were  in, 
we  remained  another  day.    The  dirt  of  the  house  (an  inn) 

*  Captain  Brant  was  chief  of  the  Mohicans,  and  his  mother  Queen  of 
the  tribe.  She  had  in  her  possession  a  service  of  plate  given  to  her 
ancestors  by  our  Queen  Anne,  which  she  took  great  pleasure  in  showing 
to  her  guests. 

t  From  a  letter  written  about  this  time  to  her  mother : — 

"  Feeling  the  imperfection  of  my  own  works,  I  comfort 
myself  in  believing  that  there  are  few  if  any  who  are  much  engaged, 
who  do  not  sometimes  miss  their  way  either  in  going  too  far  or  in 
holding  too  much  back  ;  and  I  have  sometimes  thought  in  the  solemn 
duty  of  prayer,  we  may  not  be  the  least  easily  misled  by  mistaking  the 
good  will,  which  perhaps  the  sensible  influence  of  good  brings  into  the 
heart,  for  a  commission  vocally  to  approach  the  throne  of  grace." 


166 


1833. 


[yET.  46. 


was  not  little,  and  the  provisions  so  bad  that  we  could  hardly 
find  food  enough  to  support  our  strength.  Dear  E.  K.  well 
enough  to  sit  up,  and  together  we  looked  over  our  clothes, 
mended  many  a  tatter,  and  put  on  many  a  string. 

The  meeting  this  evening  pretty  well  attended,  and  I  have 
no  doubt  was  a  favoured  one.  It  was  rather  trying  to  me  to 
begin  with  the  words  "  Wine  is  a  mocker,"  &c. 

11/A. — Glad  to  leave  our  disagreeable  inn.  We  went  on 
six  miles  to  Vittoria,  where  a  meeting  had  been  appointed 
the  day  before.  We  were  at  a  more  comfortable  inn,  and 
had  an  eatable  dinner.  My  dear  friend  ventured  out  to  the 
meeting,  which  was  a  very  large,  and  I  believe  a  good  one ; 
renewing  my  faith  that  it  must  be  the  Lord's,  not  my  doing, 
and  therefore  only  let  me  suffer  till  it  is  his  will  to  say,  "It  is 
enough." 

15th. — Dear  E.  K.  very  ill.  It  did  seem  a  fearful  respon  - 
sibility, thus  exposing  her  delicate  frame.  With  our  blankets 
and  sheets  I  got  a  good  bed  made  up  in  a  room  with  a  loom 
in  it.  I  left  her  for  a  meeting,  which  was  largely  attended, 
and  a  good  one  I  believe  it  was. 

17th. — Travelled  fifteen  miles  through  the  snow.  Glad 
we  were  to  have  something  to  smooth  the  jolts,  which  the 
day  before  had  been  almost  intolerable.  However  we  arrived 
at  the  end  of  the  day  at  a  dirty  tavern,  where  it  was 
determined  that  John  Palmer  and  George  should  go  on  to 
Norwich  for  a  covered  sleigh,  and  send  some  friends  to  us. 

18/A. — Left  to  ourselves  in  this  poor  place;  however  with 
cue  comfort — a  fire  and  a  room  to  ourselves;  and  way  rather 
remarkably  opening,  we  had  a  considerable  meeting  in  the 
evening  at  our  inn. 

24th. — Weather  very  stormy,  and  feeling  unwell,  deter- 
mined to  stay  the  day.  In  the  morning  I  catechised  the 
children.  I  believe  a  little  pains  bestowed  is  of  great  value 
to  these  inhabitants  of  the  wilderness,  who  are  so  largely 
partaking  of  the  consequences  of  the  fall.  The  children 
seemed  much  pleased  with  the  instruction,  and  at  least  a  good 
copy  of  the  scriptures  will,  I  hope,  be  the  consequence  of  our 
visit — they  had  not  a  whole  one. 

25th. — Oh  how  I  longed  to  spend  this  day  in  some  ac- 
cordance with   my  inclinations!    but  the  past  must  not 


.KT.  47.] 


1834. 


167 


interfere  with  the  present.  Press  onwards,  and  then  I  hope 
we  shall  enter  into  the  rest  the  soul  so  often  pants  for  in  this 
scene  of  labour  and  of  pain.  After  taking  leave  of  our  kind 
friends,  travelled  over  a  rough  road  to  Jeremiah  Moore's, 
who  received  us  very  kindly.  A  large  company  of  young 
people  were  there.  As  there  was  an  opening  for  a  meeting, 
we  embraced  it,  and  hoped  it  might  be  profitable  to  some. 
In  the  morning  a  number  of  young  people  were  gathered 
together,  and  I  introduced  Scripture  instruction  among  them, 
with  which  they  seemed  much  pleased.  Afterwards  had  a 
very  good  sitting  in  the  family,  which  is  an  interesting  one' — 
the  only  remnant  of  a  small  meeting  who  had  not  gone  off 
with  the  Hicksites.  Among  the  young  there  seemed  real 
sensibility. 

7th  of  \st  mo. — Went  to  Catfish,  to  an  evening  meeting ; 
the  weather  very  stormy ;  hard  to  leave  dear  E.  K.  so 
poorly;  but  she  encouraged  me  to  do  it,  and  the  night 
being  very  dark,  I  lodged  there.  Truly  I  felt  my  faith 
was  tried  in  going  without  any  female  companion.  I  was 
inexpressibly  low,  both  mind  and  body,  before  meeting  ; 
but  afterwards  had  one  of  those  blessed  gleams  of  light  and 
peace  that  allayed  all  my  fears  for  myself  and  others,  and 
gave  me  the  hope  of  preservation  and  final  deliverance  out  of 
all  our  sore  privations,  dangers,  and  difficulties. 

Qth. — Went  twenty  miles  with  a  female  Friend  and  child, 
whom  I  picked  up,  to  a  meeting  in  the  woods.  After  my 
long  ride,  kindly  received  by  some  Methodists,  who  gave  us 
tea  and  buckwheat  cake.  A  little  food  coming  in  this  way  is 
often  more  refreshing  to  a  poor  weary  traveller  than  the 
daintiest  morsel  to  the  rich  and  full  :  this  was  my  dinner. 
We  then  went  to  the  meeting,  which  I  believe  was  an 
authorised  one.  The  poor  inhabitants  of  the  very  wilderness 
seemed  quite  tender-hearted  towards  me.  Here  also  I  found 
a  ci-devant  Friend.  I  felt  interested  for  him,  for  the  heart 
of  a  Friend  seemed  in  him.  His  wife  looked  of  the  careless 
daughters — little  to  help  him  ;  but  I  might  be  mistaken.  I 
took  leave  of  my  Methodist  friends,  who  wished  me  well. 

12th. — A  large  satisfactory  meeting  in  the  Methodist 
meeting-house,  on  the  road  to  London.  Dined  with  a  young 
man  who  lived  with  John  Budge,  in  Cornwall,  and  knew  my 
(^Ornish  friends. 


168 


1831-. 


[.ET.  47. 


ISth. — Went  to  John  Moore's,  and  called  on  a  family 
where  a  j'oung  woman  was  fast  going  in  consumption. 
Although  I  had  for  some  time  past  been  desiring  to  see  her, 
I  hesitated,  knowing  her  to  be  of  a  strong  Hicksite  family ; 
but  now  the  opportunity  offering  I  thought  I  must  embrace 
it,  and  on  sending  a  message  to  say  if  it  would  be  agreeable 
I  would  call  on  her,  I  found  the  poor  girl  had  been  so  desirous 
of  seeing  me  that  her  parents  had  been  thinking  of  sending 
for  me.  We  had  a  precious  opportunity  together ;  her 
countenance  was  quite  animated  when  I  came  into  the  room, 
and  I  have  not  often  been  more  sensible  of  a  holy  influence 
than  over  the  spirit  of  that  young  woman. 

16ih. — Left  the  Widdifields',  where  for  two  weeks  we  had 
received  much  kindness. 

20ih. — Went  to  see  the  prisoners  in  the  gaol  in  the  morning, 
and  to  a  meeting  in  the  evening  a  few  miles  off. 

2lst. — Took  leave  of  John  Palmer,  who  had  been  most 
kindly  with  us  for  many  weeks  past,  and  a  true  help  and 
comfort. 

23rcl. — With  a  burdened  mind,  we  went  on  to  Oxford, 
thirty  miles,  to  a  meeting  I  had  ventured  to  appoint  there. 
Here  we  met  Adam  Stover,  who  had  come  from  Norwich  to 
fill  John  Palmer's  place,  and  afterwards  Justice  Wilson,  his 
wife  and  daughter,  kindly  came  out  to  see  us.  The  meeting 
was  a  pretty  good  one,  but  I  felt  the  time  was  not  ripe 
for  it. 

—  A  trying  night,  going  back  was  so  before  me,  and 
now  the  opportunity  offering;  employing  A.  S.  and  T.  W. 
in  giving  notice  for  meetings,  one  with  the  coloured  people 
again,  and  another  on  the  way  back.  I  felt  pretty  peaceful. 
Dined  at  the  inn  in  London,  and  should  have  done  more 
wisely  had  I  followed  a  secret  check  that  was  given  to  stay 
there  all  night. 

25ih. — Went  further  on  than  last  time  in  the  black  settle- 
ment called  Wilberforce ;  had  a  much  more  satisfactory 
meeting,  many  more  were  present,  and  I  became  better 
acquainted  with  the  state  of  things  among  them  :  felt  a  ray 
of  peace  after  it. 

26th. — Remarkably  stormy  day,  wind  and  snow  in  abun- 
dance. But,  a  meeting  being  appointed  at  Westminster, 
twelve  miles  off,  wc  went  and  found  the  house  nearly  full. 


^T,  47.] 


1831. 


169 


&h  of  2nd  mo, — Came  back  to  Norwich.  Pleasant  to  be 
among  our  friends  again. 

Qth. — The  neighbours  invited  to  our  meeting  in  the  morn- 
ing, and  a  good  one  it  was.  Saw  a  few  First-day  scholars, 
and  attended  a  meeting  in  the  woodsj  the  log  school-house 
crowded. 

\Zth. — Much  discourse  on  differences.  Had  an  interview 
with  the  opposite  parties,  which  ended  comfortably. 

\7th. — Not  easy  without  seeing  some  Friends  together,  in 
reference  to  the  sad  question  of  boundary  lines.  Way  opened 
for  it,  and  I  had  a  very  satisfactory  conference  with  the  few 
Friends  collected,  who  signed  the  paper  that  I  hope  in  time 
may  settle  all  their  differences. 

This  wish  was  fulfilled,  and  it  seems  that  H.  C. 
Backhouse's  mediation  was  the  means  of  setthng  a  long- 
existing  difference  among  Friends  of  this  place,  relative 
to  the  boundary  hnes  of  different  properties. 

\9th. — We  returned  to  the  Stover's,  and  read  a  package 
of  sixteen  letters,  a  good  account  of  our  dear  family,  but  felt 
much  the  intelligence  of  the  death  of  my  dear  cousin 
Rachel  Pease.  There  are  few  whose  friendship  I  have  valued 
more  for  a  long  course  of  years. 

2ncl  of  Si-d  mo. — Took  tea  at  John  Hill's,  and  heard  his 
wife  relate  an  interesting  story  of  the  preservation  of  herself 
and  her  father's  family  in  the  midst  of  a  very  severe  famine. 
When  their  stock  of  provisions  was  almost  exhausted,  and 
a  poor  little  half-starved  pig,  which  was  their  only  remaining 
means  of  support,  had  been  killed,  all  hope  of  relief  seemed 
to  be  lost.  Then  occurred  a  most  remarkable  circumstance  : 
every  morning  a  pigeon  came  and  settled  upon  the  paling  in 
front  of  the  house ;  this  they  shot,  and  it  formed  their  only 
provision  for  the  whole  day.  For  fourteen  days  their  wants 
were  supplied  in  the  same  manner  by  the  daily  arrival  of 
another  pigeon,  always  perching  on  the  same  spot.  In  the 
spring,  after  the  melting  of  the  snow,  there  was  a  most 
plentiful  supply  of  strawberries,  larger  than  had  ever  been 


170 


1834. 


[jet.  47. 


known  before.  She  touchingly  described  her  father's  visits 
as  he  went  round  every  night  after  they  were  in  bed,  and 
kissed  each  of  his  children,  expecting  nothing  but  death. 

To  

Stamford,  14t.h  of  3rd  mo.,  1834. 

I  have  as  usual  been  very  industrious,  in  no 
large  tract  of  country ;  however,  I  have  come  on  rather 
faster  than  usual,  and  must  do  so  to  get  to  Philadelphia 
Yearly  Meeting.  I  have  lield  some  very  interesting  meetings, 
and  received  many  marks  of  kindness  from  others  besides 
Friends. 

We  were  the  other  day  in  a  Mennonist  settlement :  these 
people  live  very  much  to  themselves,  and  are  esteemed  in 
their  neighbourhood  as  honest,  respectable  people.  They 
bear  a  testimony  against  oaths  and  war.  I  felt  the  idea  of 
this  meeting  not  a  little,  and  sat  in  it  some  time  in  great 
fear ;  but  it  was,  I  think,  comfortably  got  through.  An  old 
elder,  whose  countenance  and  appearance  was  very  like  that 
of  a  Friend,  told  me  he  was  glad  I  came,  he  hoped  I  should 
do  them  good.    *    *    *  * 

I  was  interested  in  reading  last  evening,  for  the  first 
time,  the  alterations  in  our  Queries  and  Advices.  I  cannot 
but  think  in  the  main  it  is  a  great  improvement  in  the  style 
and  manner  of  the  thing,  but  I  was  glad  to  see  the  substance 
so  much  the  same. 

The  journal  continues — 

16th,  First-day. — Meeting  at  Queeustown  in  the  morning, 
and  at  Stamford  in  the  evening,  both  interesting.  Took  tea 
with  Dr.  Mewburn,  a  brother  of  Francis  Mewburn,  where 
we  met  some  of  the  gentry  of  the  neighbourhood.  Being 
First-day  evening,  the  Doctor  proposed  reading  the  Bible, 
inviting  me  to  service  afterwards.  These  are  trying  positions, 
but  it  was  in  accordance  with  my  feelings,  and  it  proved  a 
satisfactory  termination  to  the  day's  labour. 

21*^. — Had  the  comfort  of  again  meeting  my  dear  husband, 
and  having  our  anxieties  respecting  each  other  set  at  rest. 


M-v.  47.] 


1834. 


171 


Jonathan  Backhouse  had  been  spending  some  weeks 
in  Ohio  and  Indiana,  attending  meetings  wliich  he  and 
his  wife  had  not  visited  in  the  winter  of  1830-31. 
He  travelled  principally  on  horseback,  over  roads 
which  the  hard  frozen  mud  often  rendered  difficult  and 
almost  dangerous  ;  but  his  courage  and  perseverance 
were  not  easily  daunted.  In  crossing  the  Ohio  when 
it  was  covered  with  floating  masses  of  ice,  he  describes 
being  landed  on  one  of  them,  and  having  to  step  from 
one  to  another  until  he  reached  the  opposite  shore. 
He  held  many  meetings  among  Friends  and  others  ; 
one  at  Columbus,  Ohio,  where  the  legislature  was 
sitting,  was,  he  writes,  a  "  favoured  occasion." 

In  the  course  of  this  journey,  he  writes  as  follows  : — 

I  am  truly  glad  the  slavery  question  lias  so  far  satisfactorily 
issued ;  I  liope  iiotliiug  will  interrupt  its  progress  and  opera- 
tion, till  all  shall  be  set  free.  The  more  slavery  is  known 
the  more  it  will  appear  in  its  true  and  horrible  colours. 
*  *  *  *  I  see  enough  to  make  me  thankful  that  our 
country  has  so  energetically  pursued  the  subject,  till  they 
have  brought  it  to  the  verge  of  final  extinction.  The  other 
day,  walking  on  the  banks  of  a  little  brook  that  runs  into 
Ohio,  [in  Virginia],  I  came  up  with  a  group  of  slaves  en- 
camped, and  a  quarter  of  a  mile  further,  witli  200  men, 
women  and  children,  who  had  been  bought,  and  were  waiting 
a  steam-boat  to  take  them  into  Missouri,  to  find  a  market. 
The  men  were  chained  to  each  other,  and  the  women  looked 
wretched ;  the  children  many  of  them  seemed  most  uncon- 
scious of  the  sorrows  that  awaited  them.  1  longed  to  say  a 
word  of  comfort  to  them,  I  did  to  some  of  them,  and  also 
spoke  to  their  master ;  but  I  found  him  very  difficult  to 
approach  on  the  subject,  and  all  that  seemed  left  for  me  to 
do  was  to  express  the  desire  I  felt  that  he  might  so  remember 
to  do  justly,  love  mercy,  and  walk  humbly,  that  in  a  day  to 
come  nothing  might  rise  in  condemnation  against  him.  He 
seemed  a  little  softened,  and  we  parted  under  kind  feelings  ; 


172 


183  k 


[^.T.  47. 


but  oh,  the  darkness  that  covers  the  land,  and  the  gross 
darkness  the  hearts  of  the  people  on  this  affecting  subject ! 
May  He  who  can  turn  the  heart  as  the  water  brook,  so  arise 
and  subdue  all  things  to  Himself,  that  every  bond  may  be 
broken,  and  the  oppressed  set  free. 

To  return  to  the  Journal. — 

22nd. — Dear  E.  K.  so  ill  with  the  exposure  yesterday, 
that  I  left  her  in  bed  and  took  tea  with  a  friend  in  the 
town  who  had  been  very  kind  to  my  dear  husband  and 
interested  himself  much  about  our  meeting :  indeed  he  and 
John  Hill  had  gone  through  perils,  in  consequence  of  the 
state  of  the  roads  and  the  difficulties  of  crossing  the  rivei',  in 
order  to  accomplish  it. 

23rd. — A  formidable  day  to  me  ;  the  sitting  with  the  little 
company  of  Friends  at  the  widow  Evans',  who  possibly  most 
of  them  had  but  little  of  their  profession  left,  was  reviving, 
and  in  the  evening  the  meeting  was  very  large,  and  I  believe 
to  many  satisfactory;  though,  perhaps,  I  was  more  en- 
couraged from  what  I  heard  than  from  what  I  felt. 

2nd  of  4th  mo. — Took  leave  of  our  friends ;  had  the 
comfort  of  believing  that  our  visit,  with  all  its  blunders,  had 
been  a  refreshment  to  them,  and  went  on  to  Shelby,  over  a 
road  more  than  commonly  bad.  Rather  late  at  the  week-day 
meeting  there,  but  some  I  hope  were  helped  by  the  visit. 
Had  a  meeting  in  the  town.  Trying  to  flesh  and  blood  to  be 
out  on  bad  roads  in  a  dark  night.  William  Haines  drove  me 
in  his  waggon,  and  we  reached  our  home  in  safety. 

Srd. — Went  on  towards  Rochester.  Left  Rochester  with  a 
peaceful  mind,  and  with  fine  weather  and  tolerable  roads  we 
arrived  just  in  time  for  a  meeting  appointed  at  Farmington, 
twenty  miles  off,  in  the  afternoon.  What  I  expressed  was  so 
pointed  almost  at  an  individual,  that  I  was  fearful  of  being 
mistaken  ;  but  a  Friend  afterwards  came  to  me  and  said  it  was 
what  they  wanted. 

— By  great  exertion  reached  Scipio  just  as  Friends 
were  in  the  act  of  appointing  representatives.  T  was  most 
kindly  welcomed  by  them,  and  we  had  a  nice  refreshing  time 


.«T.  47.] 


1834. 


173 


together.  Nobody  can  tell  how  imdcscrving  I  feel  of  such  a 
welcome. 

10^/i. — Quarterly  Meeting  interesting  and  pleasant,  but 
marred  by  the  false  calculations  of  otlicrs  that  we  could  not 
get  to  the  Philadelphia  Yearly  Meeting  without  leaving 
before  the  usual  meeting  for  worship  next  day.  My  mind 
did  not  seem  prepared  to  leave,  and  reason  struggled  against 
faith  for  some  time.  At  last^  yielding  to  my  feelings,  we 
lodged  at  Augustus  Rowland's  and  ventured  to  the  meeting 
next  morning,  and  amply  repaid  I  was.  Oh,  the  difference 
between  a  light  heart  and  a  burdened  one  !  We  then  pro- 
ceeded, helped  by  our  kind  friends  the  Rowlands  to  Skin- 
eatilis  to  an  appointed  meeting  in  the  Methodist  meeting- 
house. I  was  afraid  that  my  strength  would  have  given  way 
after  a  hard  travel  over  very  rough  roads,  but  it  was  re- 
newed, and  we  had  a  large  meeting  with  the  inhabitants, 
which  I  did  not  regret  holding. 

Here  ended  the  visit  to  Canada,  which  was,  perhaps, 
the  most  trying  part  of  the  American  journey.  The 
habits  of  the  people  in  a  newly-settled  country,  the 
want  of  accommodation,  and  sometimes  even  of  proper 
food,  amounted  often  to  real  hardship  ;  but  the  absence 
of  mental  cultivation  was  perhaps  the  greatest  privation. 
Meetings  were  held  night  after  night,  and,  persevering 
over  roads  that  seemed  almost  impassable,  and  in  weather 
which  it  was  thought  dangerous  to  encounter,  she  would 
go  forth  in  faith,  when  the  eager  gatherings,  the  attentive 
listening,  and  the  warm  shake  of  the  hand  afterwards, 
shewed  how  cordially  the  Gospel  message  was  received 
by  these  poor  inhabitants  of  the  wilderness.  Thus 
heart-gladdened,  she  went  on  her  way  rejoicing ;  and 
her  companion  has  graphically  described  how  she 
watched  for  her  return  from  these  expeditions,  and 
how  delightful  it  was  to  her  to  hear  the  jingling  sound 
of  the  sleigh-bells  and  to  welcome  the  beaming  counte- 
nance of  her  beloved  friend 


174  1834.  [jet.  47. 

"  Surely,"  writes  E.  P.  Gurnev,  "  there  is  no 
stronger  evidence  of  the  transforming  power  of  Divine 
grace  having  made  her  what  she  was,  than  that  which 
is  furnished  by  the  remarkable  manner  in  which  she 
was  brought,  in  submission  to  the  cross  of  Christ, 
to  renounce  those  high  feelings  which  belong  to  the 
'  wild  nature,'  and  in  this  childlike  state  yield  her 
whole  heart  to  love  and  sympathy  ;  so  that  the  theme  of 
her  after  life  was,  '  Glory  to  God  in  the  highest,  peace 
on  earth,  and  goodwill  to  men,'  loving  the  Lord  her 
God  with  all  the  strength  of  her  naturally  powerful 
affections,  and  her  neighbour  as  herself  I  well  remem- 
ber," continues  E.  P.  Gurney,  "  being  gently  corrected  by 
her  once  for  saying  (when  exposed  in  our  journey 
together  to  constant  intercourse  with  fresh  persons) 
that  I  did  long  to  get  out  of  the  way  of  human 
beings,  I  was  so  tired  of  seeing  new  faces  every  day. 
She  first  smiled  at  my  naughtiness,  and  then  directed 
ray  attention  to  that  beautiful  description  of  our  Saviour, 
under  the  character  of  Wisdom,  in  the  eighth  chapter  of 
Proverbs.  I  can  even  now,  at  the  distance  of  eighteen 
years,  see  her  countenance  beaming  with  pleasure  as  I 
read  the  latter  part.  '  Then  I  was  by  Him  as  one 
brought  up  with  Him,  and  I  was  daily  his  delight,  re- 
joicing always  before  Him,  rejoicing  in  the  habitable 
parts  of  the  earth,  and  my  delights  were  vdth  the  sons 
of  men.'" 


MT.  17.] 


1831. 


175 


CHAPTER  XIL 

MEETS   HER   HUSBAND  AT  ALBANY  PHILADELPHIA  YEARLY  MEETING-  

.lONATHAN   BACKHOUSE    ATTENDS    THAT    FOR  VIRGINIA^  HOPE  OF 

RETURN  HOME   DISAPPOINTED  INDIANA  YEARLY  MEETING  NORTH 

CAROLINA  JONATHAN  BACKHOUSE   RETURNS   TO   ENGLAND  SOUTH 

CAROLINA  TENNESSEE  KENTUCKY  CINCINNATI  OHIO  YEARLY 

MEETING  LIBERATION  TAKES  LEAVE  OF  HER  FRIENDS  IN  PHILA- 
DELPHIA VOYAGE  HOME  ARRIVAL  AT  LIVERPOOL. 

I6th. — We  arrived  at  Albany  about  three  o'clock  at  a  large 
inn,  and  asking  if  a  gentleman  of  the  name  of  Backhouse* 
was  there,  soon  found  my  dear  husband  had  just  arrived  before 
us.  It  was  very  pleasant  to  meet  thus  opportunely ;  and 
leaving  George  and  the  horses  to  come  by  another  conveyance, 
we  took  the  steam-boat  to  New  York.  The  beautiful  north 
river  was  soon  hid  by  the  shades  of  night,  and  we,  placed  in 
our  berths  to  exist  till  morning.  Forgetfulness  overtook  me, 
a  comfort  I  could  greatly  crave  in  any  watery  passage.  The 
fogs  of  the  morning  disappointed  us,  and  prevented  our  taking 
the  boat  to  Philadelphia  early  in  the  morning.  The  road  from 
Syracuse  (called  the  Cherry  Valley  road,)  runs  through  some 
of  the  most  beautiful  parts  of  the  State  of  New  York.  The 
land  mostly  in  cultivation,  sufficiently  interspersed  with  the 
old  forests  of  the  country  to  give  its  mountains  and  valleys  a 
magnificent  appearance.  I  was  particularly  pleased  with  the 
little  lake  Canadaigua  and  the  town  near  it  that  bears  the 
same  name.  Indeed,  the  upper  part  of  the  State  of  New 
York  will,  I  believe,  soon  vie  in  the  beauty  and  magnificence, 
both  of  art  and  nature,  with  anything  in  the  world.  All 
seems  flourishing  about  it,  and  the  sense  of  progression  gives 
to  all  the  scenes  of  this  country  great  animation. 

Philadelphia,  26th.  —  This  is  probably  the  last  Yearly 
Meeting  I  shall  ever  attend  in  this  interesting  city,  which,  if 
my  lot  were  to  be  cast  in  any  other  part  of  the  world  than 
where  it  has  been,  I  should  prefer  for  a  residence. 

*  In  the  intei'val  between  their  last  meeting  and  the  present,  .Jonathan 
Backhouse  had  been  travelling  in  Canada. 


176 


1834. 


[^.T.  47. 


Leaving  his  wife  in  Philadelphia,  Jonathan  Backhouse, 
in  company  with  Israel  Morris  and  several  other  Friends, 
proceeded  to  Summerton,  where  the  Yearly  Meeting  for 
Virginia  was  held.* 

"  On  the  First-day  previous,''  he  writes  "  the  multitude 
was  so  large  that  the  meeting  for  worship  was  held  under 
the  shade  of  two  large  oaks  close  by.  Towards  the 
close,  I  turned  round  and  addressed  a  large  company  of 
coloured  people.  The  Friends  here,  though  few,  hold  a 
very  important  place  as  advocates  of  the  free  coloured 
people.  One  of  the  worst  features  of  slavery  is  the  sale 
of  the  children,  which  is  a  very  frequent  occurrence,  torn 
from  their  parents  and  sent  into  the  Southern  States,  where 
probably  they  are  never  seen  or  heard  of  more  by  each 
other.  They  sell  them,  too,  by  weight, — six  or  eight  dollars 
per  pound  !  It  is  horrible  to  think  of;  yet  I  hope  the  day 
is  drawing  near  when  Virginia  may  become  a  Free  State, 
and  an  increasing  conviction  prevails  of  the  system  being 
repugnant  to  the  Gospel,  though  I  fear  not  to  a  degree  that 
can  justify  the  hope  that  the  time  is  at  hand  when  every  bond 
shall  be  broken,  and  every  captive  set  free." 

Jonathan  Backhouse  rejoined  his  wife  at  New  York, 
when  they  attended  the  Yearly  Meeting  there. 

To  HER  Mother. 

New  York,  28th  of  5th  mo.,  1834. 

I  expect  we  shall  receive  our  certificates  from 
the  meeting  to-morrow  :  the  kindness  and  love  of  Friends  is 
sweet,  I  desire  not  in  any  way  to  be  caught  by  it.  All  that 
I  seem  most  to  crave  now,  is,  that  our  path  may  be  directed 
by  that  wisdom  that  is  without  the  partiality  induced  by  tlie 
bias  of  natural  feelings.  I  am  now  in  a  position  very  difficult 
to  escape  from  them.  T  desire  to  be  satisfied  as  to  the  time  of 
embarking,  and  to  come  home,  feeling  that  it  is  my  place  to 
be  there,  or  I  know  I  could  be  no  good  or  comfort  to  any 
one ;  but  though  I  trust  the  time  is  approaching,  I  do  not 

*  This  Yearly  Meeting  is  now  merged  in  that  held  at  B;iltiiiinre. 


.ET.  47.] 


183  J.. 


177 


wisli  to  set  my  heart  uj^on  it  until  it  comes.  The  dear 
children's  letters  arc  very  pressing,  and  all  the  wise  coun- 
sellors think  the  time  for  return  draws  near ;  but  there  is  One 
wiser  than  Daniel,  and  as  it  was  by  His  counsel  we  came,  so  I 
trust  it  may  be  by  His  permission,  if  not  command,  we  may 
return. 

To  Amelia  Opie. 

New  York,  2nd  of  6th  mo.,  1834. 

My  dear  Friend, 

Thou  canst  hardly  suppose  the  gratification  th)'- 
truly  kind  attentions  have  given  to  me,  and  to  many  others 
also ;  the  likenesses  of  those  so  dear  to  me,  are  valuable 
indeed ;  the  mark  of  increasing  maturity  came  very  home  to 
me,  and  truly  the  cry  "Comeback!  comeback!"*  reached  the 
inmost  recesses  of  my  heart,  in  the  dawnings  too  of  faith  and 
hope  that  the  restoration  of  these  precious  gifts  at  the  hands 
of  Him  from  whom  they  were  received,  and  for  whose  sake  we 
believe  they  were  left,  is,  at  no  remote,  though  not  yet  defined 
period,  in  reserve  for  us.  To  be  restored  to  you  all  again  in 
peace,  is  a  hoped  for  (though  I  acknowledge  an  unmerited) 
mercy,  for  if  one  taste  be  given  of  those  glories  that  shall 
hereafter  be  revealed,  the  sufferings  of  moments  past  are 
not  worthy  to  be  compared  to  them ;  and  seeing  how  frailty, 
shortsightedness,  and  impatience  were  stamped  upon  them, 
we  acknowledge  that  we  are  not  worthy  even  that  our  lives 
should  be  given  us  for  a  prey,  much  less  that  the  calming 
influences  of  the  Holy  Spirit  should  speak  the  language, 
"She  has  done  what  she  could;"  but  as  this  language  is 
not  yet  fully  and  intelligibly  heard,  that  it  may  be  yet 
patiently  waited  for  is  the  daily  desire  of  my  heart. 

19th  of  7th  mo. — I  do  trust,after  so  much  of  public  life,  some 
time  of  domestic  comfort  may  be  allowed  us  for  the  renova- 
tion of  bodily  and  mental  strength,  and  the  right  ordering  of 
our  worldly  affairs ;  for  I  never  was  more  persuaded  that 
there  is  a  time  to  keep  silence  as  well  as  a  time  to  speak,  and 
that  if  this  time  be  missed,  the  growth  in  grace  is  greatly 

*  Referriug  to  the  device  on  the  seal — a  guinea  fowl  crying  "  Come 
back." 

N 


178 


]  83 1. 


[/ET.  47 


injured,  and  that  it  is  as  difficult  for  those  accustomed  to  speak, 
to  discern  this  time,  as  it  is  for  those  not  accustomed  to  it  to 
know  when  to  speak. 

After  attending  the  Yearly  Meetings  of  New  York 
and  of  New  England,  and  holding  several  meetings  in  the 
latter  province,  Jonathan  Backhouse  returned  to  Vir- 
ginia, whilst  his  wife  visited  several  Quarterly  Meet- 
ings in  the  State  of  New  York.  They  worked  hard 
during  an  intensely  hot  season,  hoping  that  they  might 
be  permitted,  after  four  years  of  arduous  labour  in 
America,  to  return  to  their  home  and  family.  But 
when  the  time,  to  which  they  had  looked  as  the 
termination  of  their  labours  had  arrived,  they  believed 
that  further  service  was  yet  required  at  their  hands. 
Again  they  surrendered  all  as  a  living  sacrifice  to  their 
God,  exhibiting  in  this,  as  well  as  on  many  other  deeply 
proving  occasions,  the  character  ascribed  to  Levi  in  the 
blessings  of  Moses, — Deut.  xxxiii.  8—11. 

Exhausted  by  what  she  had  gone  through  in  coming 
to  this  decision,  a  little  repose  was  now  needful  for 
H.  C.  Backhouse  ;  and  whilst  her  husband  went  forward 
to  attend  the  Yearly  Meeting  of  Ohio,  she  remained  a 
few  days  at  Bedford  Springs,  under  the  kind  care  of 
her  friend  Marmaduke  Cope,  and  then,  with  restored 
health,  travelled  towards  Indiana,  with  the  view  of 
attending  the  Yearly  Meeting,  Jonathan  Backhouse 
joining  her  on  the  way. 

On  their  arrival  at  -Hichmond  they  found  a  new  trial 
awaiting  them,  in  consequence  of  reports  that  had  pre- 
ceded them  affecting  the  soundness  of  their  views  on 
some  important  points.  On  a  full  investigation  of  these 
charges  they  were  of  course  found  to  be  wholly  ground- 
less, and  they  were  accordingly  received  by  Friends  of 
that  Yearly  Meeting  with  the  utmost  cordiality  ;  all 
barriers  were  broken  down,  and  they  were  enabled,  in 


^.T.  47.] 


1831. 


179 


the  demonstration  of  the  Spirit,  to  bear  Hving  testimo- 
nies to  the  truth  as  it  is  in  Jesus.  Alluding  to  these 
circumstances,  H.  C.  Backhouse  writes — 

Though  a  jealousy  was  spread  over  the  minds  of  many 
Friends  on  our  account,  all  seemed  done  away  in  the  end ; 
and  the  affection  manifested  bj"^  hundreds  on  our  taking  leave 
at  the  close  of  the  Yearly  ]\Ieeting  was  very  humbling  and 
aff'ecting.  The  most  grateful  speech  to  me  was  from  a  dear 
valuable  friend,  who  came  to  the  carriage  after  I  had  taken 
leave  of  her,  saying,  with  tears  in  her  eyes,  "  I  do  believe 
when  thou  gettest  home  all  thy  bonds  will  be  burst."  This 
brought  joy  into  my  heart ;  for  often  have  I  been  ready  to 
fear  this  would  never  be  my  blessed  experience.* 

*  Writing  to  J.  and  II.  C.  Backhouse's  children,  a  Friend  says : — 
"When  I  look  at  the  benefits  likely  to  result  to  our  beloved 
Society  from  the  labours  of  your  parents,  I  feel  thankful  that 
they  have  been  sent  amongst  us,  and  trust  that  their  many  trials 
and  humiliations  in  the  service  of  their  Lord  will  to  them  be  '  an 
evident  token  for  good,'  and  that  in  time  to  come  those  who  have 
reaped  the  benefit  of  their  labours  will  arise  and  call  them  blessed. 
In  the  dissemination  of  Scriptural  knowledge  among  the  poor  and 
ignorant  in  an  especial  manner — although  their  efforts  have  not  been 
confined  to  those  classes — their  works  will  long  be  remembered  with 
gratitude  ;  their  sympathies  have  been  awakened  peculiarly  towards 
those  who  seemed  to  be  forgotten,  and  the  abodes  of  the  unlettered  and 
the  needy  have  been  visited  and  cheered,  not  only  by  their  munificence 
in  administering  to  their  earthly  wants,  but  in  ofifering  to  their  sin-sick 
souls  the  knowledge  of  a  Saviour  and  a  Redeemer,  and  placing  within 
their  reach  the  means  of  Bible  instruction.  It  is  not  difficult  to  account 
for  the  ignorance  prevailing  in  Canada,  and  in  many  parts  of  the 
United  States,  among  the  members  of  our  religious  Society.  In  newly 
settled  countries,  to  obtain  food  and  raiment  is  the  jjrimary  object ; 
schooling  is  very  difiicult,  and  the  time  even  of  children  too  important 
in  daily  business  to  admit  of  their  being  allowed  to  devote  much  time 
to  books.  People  in  remote  situations  generally,  I  believe,  continue 
poor,  or  if  otherwise,  they  have  lost  the  taste  and  value  for  le.irning,  in 
their  strenuous  efforts  to  obtain  a  living,  and  thus  generation  after 
generation,  ignorance  is  perpetuated  almost  insensibly,  after  the  causes 
which  first  produced  it,  have  ceased  to  exist.  To  dispel  this  cloud  which 
rested  on  many  portions  of  the  vineyard  where  your  precious  parents  . 
have  been  led,  has  been  their  peculiar  business  both  as  ministers  and 

v  2 


180 


1834, 


[/ET.  47. 


Leaving  Indiana,  they  steamed  down  the  Ohio,  and 
then,  by  a  road  cut  for  more  than  100  miles  on  the 
sides  of  the  Alleghany  mountains,  through  scenery  of 
rich  magnificence,  they  entered  North  Carolina. 

Greensborougli,  Slat  of  lOth  mo.,  1834. 

*  *  *  *  We  are  surrounded  with  many 
blessings,  and  we  ought  to  consider  it  one  of  the  greatest 
that  we  are  esteemed  wortliy  to  suffer  in  a  cause  that  has 
eternal  life  for  its  end  and  object;  but  that  the  hour  of 
suffering  may  pass  from  us  is  not  an  unhallowed  desire,  if  it 
be  accompanied  with  resignation.  We  have  now  been 
travelling  some  hundreds  of  miles  through  slave  States.  The 
distress  of  seeing  these  poor  creatures  on  the  road,  just  bought 
up  by  the  slave-dealers,  separated  from  the  nearest  relations 
of  life,  never  more,  in  all  probability,  to  be  heard  of  again  by 
them,  is  unspeakably  great,  although  I  believe  there  are  many, 
especially  the  domestic  slaves,  well  treated,  and  that  even  a 
pious  care  is  often  extended  over  them ;  yet  the  system  is 
horrible.  They  are  kept  in  as  much  ignorance  and  degrada- 
tion as  possible.  Could  j^ou  see  what  I  see,  and  hear  what  I 
hear,  you  would  not  wonder  that  we  are  called  to  suffer  as  we 
do.    No  one  that  has  not  seen  it  can  tell  what  slavery  is. 

To  Jane  Gukney. 
Deep  Eiver,  North  Carolina,  14th  of  11th  mo.,  1834. 

I  have  been  desiring  to  write  to  thee  this  last 
week,  but  great  weariness  of  body  and  close  engagement  have 
prevented  me.  The  Yearly  Meeting  ended  comfortably,  and 
we  received  the  most  cordial  welcome  from  all.  Nathan 
Hunt  was  very  kind  and  fatherly,  and  expressed  his  belief  that 
my  coming  here  was  on  my  journey  heavenward.  Nothing 
short  of  such  a  belief  (in  another  form  of  words)  would  have 

as  members  of  our  Society ;  they  have  endeavoured  to  diffuse,  wherever 
they  have  been,  gospel  light  ;  and  whilst  they  have  suffered,  I  doubt 
not,  keenly  in  passing  through  a  thirsty  land,  yet  I  do  hope  and  believe 
they  have  been  refreshed  from  season  to  season  in  watering  others." 


.•ET.  47.] 


1834. 


181 


induced  me  to  come.  The  desire  of  being  again  with  you  in 
peace,  is  almost  continually  with  me  so  that  I  have  found  it 
more  than  usually  hard  work  getting  along  without  a  mur- 
muring spirit,  but  when  my  own  mind  sinks  and  I  am  ready 
to  question  the  rectitude  of  all  my  steps,  the  encouragement 
of  Friends  is  poured  in  upon  me.  Since  the  Yearly  Meeting 
we  have  attended  a  Quarterly  Meeting,  and  had  a  Friends' 
Meeting  laid  out  for  every  day  for  two  weeks  after.  This  I 
thought  a  bold  stroke,  but  so  far  it  has  answered.  The 
meetings  lie  at  no  great  distance,  but  more  than  one  in  the 
day  is  too  much  for  me.  My  dear  husband  has  left  us  to 
attend  other  meetings;  we  expect  to  meet  him  again  at 
Nathan  Hunt's  next  week.  Last  evening  we  had  a  great 
treat  in  being  in  the  company  of  a  sweet  Friend,  ninety-two 
years  old,  convinced  of  Friends'  principles,  or  persuaded  to 
embrace  them,  by  Rachel  "Wilson.  She -is  in  perfect  health 
of  body — faculties  remarkably  bright,  except  the  sense  of 
hearing,  which  is  considerably  impaired — she  spins  and  knits, 
and  sews  a  great  deal,  never  liking  to  be  idle — she  is  a  woman 
of  excellent  understanding,  extremely  neat  in  her  person,  and 
apparently  in  the  enjoyment  of  perfect  peace.  Her  descrip- 
tion of  her  own  state  was  that  she  felt  "  as  easy  as  a  little 
child/' — has  not  a  pain  by  day,  and  sleeps  well  all  night.  If 
the  end  of  all  my  labours  might  be  such  a  state,  surely  it  must 
be  enough  !  This  Friend  has  brought  up  a  large  family,  and 
had  her  share  of  affliction  in  an  intemperate  husband ;  but  it 
is  said  she  was  always  in  good  humour  with  him.  Towards 
the  end  of  his  life  he  reformed,  and  died  a  member  of  our 
society.  It  was  sweet  to  me  to  see  the  delight  she  appeared 
to  be  to  the  household.  She  was  living  in  her  daughter's 
house,  and  the  pride  and  pleasure  of  her  grandchildren  as 
well  as  children,  who  considered  their  house  blessed  by  her 
presence. 

Raleigh,  8th  of  12th  mo.,  1834. 

My  dearly  beloved  Children, 

*  *  *  *    I  met  your  dear  father  unexpectedly 
at  Raleigh,  the  capital  of  this  State .  Here  were  assembled  the 


182 


isy  1.. 


47. 


Governor,  Senate  and  Commons,  two  Friends  also,  appointed 
by  Nortli  Carolina  Yearly  Meeting,  to  present  a  petition 
for  the  repeal  of  the  laws  that  prohibited  slaves  being  taught 
to  read  or  allowed  to  preach.    On  the  way  we  had  a  meeting, 
in  a  place  where  there  is  a  college,  and  badly  indeed  did  some 
of  the  students  behave.    The  history  of  Elisha  and  the  boys 
came  into  my  mind,  and  I  regretted  not  relating  it  to  them ; 
however  the  meeting  ended  better  than  might  have  at  first  been 
expected.  Next  day  we  came  to  Raleigh,  and  had  a  very  large 
public  meeting  on  First-day  evening,  in  the  Presbyterian 
meeting-house.    The  meeting  was  so  unsettled,  and  there  was 
so  mucli  coughing  to  make  us  speak,  that  remembering  the  dis- 
satisfaction I  had  felt  for  not  reproving  the  young  men  [on 
the  previous  evening],  I  ventured  to  rise,  and  reminded  them 
of  the  injunction  to  the  disciples  "not  to  throw  pearls  before 
swine,"  &c.,  and  that  gospel  truths  were  not  to  be  given  to 
unprepared  minds.    This  I  did  as  delicately  as  I  could  ;  and 
soon  after,  your  father  knelt  down,  and  we  had  a  meeting 
that  relieved  my  mind  more  than  usual.  The  next  evening,  I 
had  one  with  the  members  of  the  Legislature  exclusively,  and 
though  I  might,  with  more  composure,  have  made  more  of 
the  opportunity,  I  found  I  had  not  displeased  them.  They 
■were  perhaps  surprised  that  nothing  offensive  was  said  by 
such  known  opposers  of  slavery,  though  the  subject  was 
strongly  alluded  to. 

The  yoke  of  slavery,  instead  of  being  made  increasingly 
easy,  is  harder  and  harder ;  laws  are  making  yet  more  severe, 
and  they  are  determined  to  keep  the  blacks  in  as  much 
degradation  as  they  can,  falsely  believing  it  is  the  only  way 
to  preserve  their  power.  I  have  thought  continually  since  I 
have  been  in  North  Carolina,  and  seen  something  of  the 
deplorable  condition  of  these  human  beings,  and  heard  very 
much  more, — that  "the  measure  of  the  iniquities"  of  the 
white  people  was  rapidly  filling  up ;  and  judgments  are  already 
evidently  pouring  on  the  State  :  the  inhabitants  leaving  it  in 
numbers,  those  possessing  slaves  going  principally  to  Ken- 
tucky and  Alabama — those  that  feel  its  iniquity,  to  Ohio  and 
Indiana.  There  Friends  flock  in  abundance,  and  I  cannot 
suppose  they  will  remain  here  many  years  longer,  unless  a 
change  takes  place  that  does  not  look  probable  at  present. 


M-i.  48.] 


1835. 


183 


A  blight  evidently  rests  upon  this  part  of  the  country; 
instead  of  improvement  everything  is  going  backward, — 
houses  in  wretched  repair,  meeting-houses  in  the  most  un- 
comfortable condition, — not  a  pane  of  glass — light  as  it  may 
be  with  an  open  door  or  shutter.    *    *    -x-  * 

.  Tlie  families  in  New  Garden  Monthly  IVIeeting,  Deep 
River  and  Sioringfield,  were  now  visited. 

16th  of  1st  mo.,  1835. 

My  dearest  Mothee, 

Thy  deeply  interesting  letter  from  Southend 
I  have  received  this  day ;  and  reading  it  just  before  meeting, 
(not  my  usual  habit),  it  did  not  make  me  less  serious 
than  usual,  or  less  desirous  of  drawing  near  to  Him  who 
has  been  wisdom  and  strength  to  those  who  have  desired  to 
follow  his  guidance,  in  every  age  of  the  world.  Hitherto, 
I  have  had  no  reason  to  doubt  that  our  protracted  stay 
has  been  rightly  ordered;  though  I  have  never  been  more 
solicitous  for  ourselves  as  ministers,  for  the  claims  of  our 
family  and  friends,  and  for  the  cause  of  righteousness,  lest 
it  should  suffer  in  any  way  through  our  mistakes.  I  do  feel 
it  a  very  important  thing  that  we  should  time  our  return 
well.  If  the  church  with  you  wants  us,  it  can  only  be  as  we 
return  to  it  in  the  best  ordering ;  it  may  have  been  best,  for 
our  own  sakes,  to  have  been  absent  these  last  few  years,  and 
when  I  return,  it  will  be  with  sincere  desires  that  discretion 
may  preserve  us. 

The  account  of  the  state  of  society  in  England  has  been 
very  interesting  to  me,  and  I  look  with  great  solicitude  to 
the  transactions  of  the  Yearly  Meeting.  I  do  trust  Friends 
will  examine  things  on  the  broad  foundation  of  unchangeable 
truth,  which  first  brought  iis  to  be  a  people,  and  not  be  led 
away  with  the  cry  of  ancient  doctrines  and  ancient  principles; 
thus,  when  Moses  was  extolled  by  the  Jews,  he  was  not  in 
truth  believed  in.  I  suppose  many  disputes  have  arisen  as 
to  the  place  the  Scriptures  should  hold,  and  some  are  very 
jealous  of  Barclay's  expression  of  their  being  a  secondary 
rule.    I  cannot  but  wish  he  had  never  used  it,  as  it  has 


184 


1835. 


[^T.  48. 


caused  so  many  disputes.  "  First  and  Second/'  seem  to  me 
to  have  nothing  to  do  with  the  question.  "  These  are  they 
which  testify  of  me,"  said  our  Lord. 

The  snow  has  rendered  travelling  almost  impracticable 
these  last  few  days.  The  cold  has  been  intense  in  America ; 
in  the  northern  States  the  mercury  has  frozen  in  the  tubes, 
and  here  the  thermometer  has  been  below  zero  for  several 
days.  From  want  of  stoves  or  fires  in  the  meeting-houses, 
and  the  very  open  state  of  the  dwelling-houses,  I  do  not 
think  that  in  any  winter  we  have  found  the  cold  more  trying.* 

29i/i.  —  I  have  just  been  at  meeting,  and  laid  before 
Friends  my  prospect  of  visiting  the  families  of  the  place 
(there  arc  about  sixty).  I  have  since  enjoyed  more  quietude 
and  peace  of  mind  than  I  have  partaken  of  for  some  time. 
The  future  I  must  leave,  and  be  thankful  for  the  present. 

■*  From  a  Feiend  in  Carolina. 

"The  labours  of  youi'  beloved  parents  have  been  very 
acceptable  to  us,  and  more  abundant  and  general  than  those  of  any 
Friends  that  ever  visited  us  from  Europe,  since  my  remembrance. 
They  have  attended  not  only  the  meetings  of  Friends  generally  in  these 
parts,  but  had  many  meetings  with  those  of  other  societies,  and  your 
dear  mother  has  visited  many  families  in  several  Quarterly  Meetings. 

Notwithstanding  the  difference  of  climate,  of  manners,  and  customs, 
and  the  great  difference  and  generally  inferior  style  of  living  in  this 
Southern  country  from  what  your  parents  have  been  accustomed  to, 
they  have  accommodated  themselves  to  all  these  circumstances,  with 
much  Christian  simplicity  and  magnanimity,  which  has  been  an  addi- 
tional satisfaction  to  us,  and  rendered  their  labours  easier,  and  them- 
selves so  much  more  useful. 

I  have  rarely  seen  a  Friend  whom  I  have  loved  more  than  your  dear 
father  ;  and  the  sweetness  and  weight  of  spirit  of  your  dear  mother 
has  often  been  refreshing  to  me  :  both  in  meetings  and  in  families,  in 
silence  and  in  gospel  communication,  the  weight  of  their  exercise,  and 
their  abimdant  labours  in  this  country,  and  especially  in  this  neigh- 
bourhood, have  been  inexpressibly  relieving  to  my  mind.  Although 
they  have  been  so  long  in  America,  and  their  vessels  so  often  filled  with 
the  j^recious  oil  of  the  Heavenly  kingdom,  or  with  the  honey  from  the 
living  rock,  and  jjoured  out  and  diffused  amongst  us,  they  still  have 
access  to  the  inexhaustible  fountain,  they  are  as  fresh  and  green  as 
ever,  in  the  blessed  truth,  and  in  the  love  and  power  of  the  religion  of 
Jesus." 


^T.  48.] 


1835. 


185 


From  Jonathan  Backhouse. 

2nd  of  2nd  mo.,  1835. 

The  houses  in  this  State  are  generally  poor,  we 
lodged  in  one  lately  which  had  not  a  glass  wdndow  in  it, 
nothing  but  an  opening  with  a  window  shutter,  and  if  some  of 
them  were  once  glazed,  so  many  squares  are  now  out  that  you 
might  almost  as  well  be  without  them  altogether.  Now  that 
the  weather  has  become  cold  it  is  very  trying,  and  when  very 
cold  we  either  sit  almost  in  darkness,  or  leave  the  door  open. 
The  climate  is  certainly  mild,  but  it  sometimesfeels  rather  hard 
fare  ;  yet  we  have  no  cause  to  complain,  for  we  are  preserved 
in  health,  though  sickness  abounds. 

23rc?.  —  Our  engagements  in  North  Carolina  have  been 
protracted  beyond  what  I  anticipated,  but  they  have  in  their 
winding  up  left  a  sweet  and  clear  evidence  of  a  peaceful 
release  from  this  part  of  the  heritage. 

Feeling  no  further  call  for  service  in  America,  it 
seemed  best  for  Jonathan  Backhouse  to  return  home, 
leaving  his  wife  to  complete  her  engagements,  "  which," 
she  says,  "have  been  so  evidently  owned  that  I  dare 
not  yet  break  off."  They  parted  at  Charleston,  South 
Carolina,  from  whence  she  writes  :  — 

18th  of  4th  mo.  1835. 

My  dearest  Mother, 

The  path  of  duty  has  ever  been  a  deeply 
proving  one,  and  something  of  the  feelings  of  Abraham  have 
surely  attended  my  mind  in  giving  up  my  beloved  husband, 
thyself  and  children,  for  a  continuance  of  a  few  months  longer 
in  this  part  of  the  world. 

This  setting  up  of  my  conviction  of  right  in  opposition  to 
thine,  has  cost  me  as  deep  searching  of  heart,  as  I  believe  it 
is  possible  for  me  to  pass  through.  But  I  never  could  see  a 
clear  conclusion  to  the  visit  till  after  the  next  Ohio  Yearly 
Meeting.  The  suffering  it  has  cost  me  is  only  fully  known 
to  the  Searcher  of  hearts,  and  if  I  perish  it  must  surely  be 


186 


183."). 


[^T.  48. 


at  his  footstool.  My  dear  husband's  mind  seems  clear  as  to 
returning,  but  I  hope  the  separation  will  not  be  long.  The 
Ohio  Yearly  Meeting  is,  I  trust,  the  boundary  of  my  mission. 

Farewell !  my  dearest  mother.  I  still  trust  the  Shepherd  of 
Israel  will  keep  that  which  is  committed  to  Him  in  his  own 
peace;  and  commending  thee  my  precious  mother,  my  hus- 
band, and  children  to  his  protection, 

I  am  thy  truly  affectionate  child, 

H.  C.  Backhouse. 

After  Jonathan  Backhouse's  departure  two  or  three 
meetings  were  held  at  Charleston,  another  at  George 
Town,  H.  C.  Backhouse  and  her  companion  then  re- 
traced their  steps  through  North  Carolina,*  spending  a 
few  days  more  in  the  animating  company  of  their 
venerable  friend  Nathan  Hunt. 

*  From  E.  P.  Kirkbride  to  J.  G.  and  A.  Backhouse. 

The  manners  iu  the  South  and  North  are  very  different. 
Instead  of  rushing  out  the  moment  they  are  told  the  meeting  is  over, 
the  people  crowd  around  us  to  shake  hands,  in  such  a  way  that  it  is 
difficult  to  reach  the  door  ;  the  children  climbing  over  pews  and  benches 
in  order  to  get  near  enough  to  say  "  good  evening,"  and  the  poor  blacks 
smiling  and  curtseying,  look  overjoyed  when  your  beloved  mamma  puts 
out  her  hand  and  makes  the  kind  inquiry,  "  How  art  thou?" 

A  lady  who,  with  true  southern  hospitality,  received  ua  at  her  man- 
sion some  weeks  since,  because  the  inns  were  full,  observed  to  me,  "  The 
Northern  people  don't  know  anything  of  slavery  at  all ;  they  think  it 
means  perpetual  bondage  merely,  but  of  the  depth  of  degradation  that 
that  word  involves  they  have  no  conception.  If  they  had  any  just 
idea  of  it,  I  am  sure  they  would  use  every  eflbrt  to  put  an  end  to  such 
iniquity."  This,  I  believe,  is  very  much  the  case  ;  things  at  a  distance 
we  can  hardly  realize,  and  know  not  what  to  credit  of  the  tales  we 
hear.  A  nice  slave  came  to  me  the  other  day,  to  tell  me  what  "  great 
joy"  your  mother's  meetings  were  to  "  colour  people."  "  "Why  me," 
she  says,  "  dat  minnit  me  look  on  Missis's  face,  me  sure  she  here  for 
good ;  den  when  her  colour  come  and  go  so  quick,  she  hab  a  berry 
angel  on  her  countenance."  Her  husband  gave  us  a  most  touching 
history  of  their  life  of  bondage,  his  broken  manner  adding  to  the 
interest.  He  said,  "  Me  got  religion  many  years  ago,  and  den  me  sing 
and  pray,  and  colour  people  come  about  to  hear  ;  but  one  day  Massa 


yET.  48.] 


1835. 


187 


Springfield,  13tli  of  5tli  mo.,  .1835. 

Well,  dears,  I  do  trust  that  the  Autumti  will 
bring  us  all  together  again,  in  a  peace  the  world  cannot 
give ;  and  yet  even  this  great  blessing  we  must  only  crave  in 
the  will  of  Him  who  alone  knows  when  even  those  who  love 
Him  most  are  able  to  receive  it.  That  it  is  a  blessing  not  at 
our  command,  I  never  more  abundantly  experienced  than 
during  the  past  years  of  my  life ;  for  a  few  moments  I  have 
enjoyed  it  to  a  degree  that  assured  me,  by  an  evidence  past 
the  possibility  of  a  doubt,  of  the  realities  and  unspeakable 
glories  of  the  Gospel,  that  our  belief  in  the  joys  of  the 
blessed,  was  no  cunningly  devised  fable,  but  solid  substantial 
truth.  ***** 

Very  closely  have  I  endeavoured  to  examine  whether  it 
was  my  place  to  be  at  the  Yearly  Meeting  in  London  this 
year.  Rumours  of  unsettlement  in  religious  opinion  amongst 
us  have  reached  us  from  many  quarters,  so  that  I  have  looked 
with  feelings  of  deep  interest  to  this  occasion ;  but,  however 

tell  me, '  Tom.'  Me  say,  '  Here  Sir.'  Den  Massa  he  say,  '  Tom,  you  no 
quit  exhortiu,  me  sell  you  strait  away.'  Den  me  leave  off  long  time  ; 
but  Christmas  come,  and  me  so  fitll  of  tanks  me  heart  runs  over  ;  den 
me  begin  to  sing  and  pray  again,  and  INIassa  right  soon  sen  me  word, 
'  Be  still but  me  is  much  happy,  me  keep  on.  Den  Massa  send  forme, 
an  order  me  bout  tirty  lashes  ;  and  he  say  '  Now  Tom  you  pray  no 
more.'  But  me  say,  '  Yes  Sir,  but  me  mws;  pray  :  me  serb  you  allays,  you 
my  eartly  Massa ;  but  when  you  tell  me  not  to  serb  my  hebenly  Massa, 
den  me  dare  not  bey  you.'  Massa  grow  berry  mad  :  he  say  '  You  sail  hab 
tirty  lashes  more  if  you  no  promise  quit  such  troubliu  noise  ;'  but  me 
keep  tell  him  no — me  feel  it  right  to  pray — me  sorry  disoblige  him,  but 
me  forced  do  what  right.  Massa  grow  madder  ;  till  he  say,  '  Go  out  my 
sight  forebber.  Here,  take  Tom  away,  and  sell  he  to  de  highest  bidder.' 
Den  me  beg  Linna  (Belinda)  may  be  sole  well  as  myself,  and  Massa 
he  say  '  Yes  ;  go  along  away  out  of  my  sight  all  at  belong  to  you  ;  I 
nebber  want  to  look  at  you  again.'  Den  overseer  put  we  on  de  table, 
and  he  sell  we  bote,  and  now  us  got  good  places,  tanks  to  my  gracious 
Massa.  New  Massa  is  a  Jew,  dat  me  no  like  so  well ;  but  den  he  berry 
kind,  and  nebber  sturbs  me  when  me  sing  and  pray." 

Poor  Tom  !  I  have  not  done  him  justice,  certainly  ;  but  truly  I  did 
think  that  something  of  the  spirit  of  the  holy  mai'tyr.s  rested  on  this 
pool",  ignorant,  but  honest-hearted  follower  of  the  Lamb. 


188 


1835. 


[jet.  48. 


outwardly  it  may  appear  desirable  to  myself  or  my  friends 
that  I  sliould  be  there,  if  it  be  not  in  the  ordering  of  Him 
whose  wisdom  is  far  above  ours,  it  might  be  of  deplorable 
consequence  to  myself,  and,  as  far  as  my  influence  extends,  to 
the  church.  Never  was  there  a  time  when  we  had  more  need 
to  dwell  near  the  Fountain  of  all  good,  that  we  may  distin- 
guish between  that  which  serves  God  and  that  which  serves 
Him  not.  For  you,  my  dear  children,  and  for  myself,  I 
crave  a  meek  and  quiet  spirit,  and  whenever  you  feel  this  is 
injured  either  in  conversation — whatever  be  the  subject  of  it — 
or  by  action,  I  believe  the  reproofs  of  instruction  will  be  near 
at  hand,  to  convince  you  this  is  not  of  Him  who  was  meek 
and  lowly  of  heart.  It  may  be  you  will  fall  in  company 
with  those  who  make  the  subject  of  religious  opinions  a 
matter  of  conversation,  with  comments  on  ministers  and 
ministry  very  freely  oflered ;  the  less  you  join  in  it,  the  better 
it  will  suit  my  taste  and  judgment,  though  I  do  not  wish 
you  to  go  blindfold  through  the  world — nor  is  there  any 
occasion  for  it — yet  these  things  should  be  weighed  in  a 
manner  and  under  an  influence  which  is  too  rarely  to  be 
found  in  common  conversation,  and  it  is  I  believe  seldom  the 
place  for  it. 

From  North  Carolina,  H.  C.  Backhouse  passed  through 
Tennessee  and  Kentucky,  slave-holding  States.  Often 
was  she  attracted  to  the  dwellings  of  the  large  slave- 
holders, and,  although  on  entering  them  she  sometimes 
met  with  a  cool  reception,  not  a  single  instance  is  re- 
membered in  which  the  hearts  of  the  visited  were  not 
evidently  softened  by  her  ministrations  ;  and  not  unfre- 
quently,  judging  by  their  looks,  they  thought  they  had 
been  entertaining  "  an  angel  unawares."  Thus  was  she 
enabled  in  various  ways,  by  the  qualifying  power  of  the 
I  loly  Spirit,  to  promote  the  coming  of  that  glorious  day 
when  "  the  kingdoms  of  this  world  shall  become  the 
kingdoms  of  God  and  of  his  Christ,  and  He  shall  reign 
for  ever  and  ever." 


M-i\  48.]  1835.  189 

The  day  so  earnestly  longed  for  had  now  arrived  ;  her 
firm  belief  that  a  clear  dismissal  would,  if  faith  and 
patience  were  abode  in,  .be  in  the  right  time  granted, 
was  at  length  realized. 

After  attending  the  Yearly  Meeting  of  Ohio,*  she  felt 
that  her  bonds  were  burst  ;  "  and  my  mind,"  she 
says,  "  is  most  mercifully  clear  as  to  its  being  now  time 
for  me  to  leave  America,  and  I  have  had  some  sweet 
moments  of  entire  peace  of  mind,  in  which  the  prospect 
of  being  soon  with  you  has  been  an  almost  overwhelm- 

*  The  following  address  teas  taken  down  from  memory  after  a  meeting 
held  hy  H.  C.  Backhouse,  at  Columhus,  Ohio,  in  the  Seventh  month  : — 

"  Striking,  indeed,  must  the  contrast  have  been  between  the  humble 
shepherd  from  the  land  of  Canaan  and  the  mighty  monarch  of  the 
Egyptian  throne,  when  he  appeared  before  him  as  a  suppliant  beggar, 
driven  by  want  and  famine  from  his  home.  Pharaoh  was  in  the  midst 
of  pomp  and  power,  his  empire  was  indeed  a  mighty  one  ;  but  Jacob 
was  a  follower  of  Him  whose  kingdom,  we  are  told,  is  not  of  this  world, 
and  as  he  stood  before  this  earthly  potentate,  he  told  his  simple  story 
in  these  words  : — '  Few  and  evil  have  been  the  days  of  my  pilgrimage.' 
Great  was  the  contrast  in  their  situation  then. 

"  Strikingly  different  their  allotment  now.  The  house  of  Pharoah 
has  gone  down  for  ever.  The  splendid  ruins  of  his  mighty  kingdom 
serve  as  a  monument  to  mark  the  frailty  and  the  pride  of  man,  as  well 
as  to  proclaim  in  fearful  characters  the  power  and  majesty  of  Israel's 
God — confirming,  too,  the  truth  of  prophecy  ;  for  are  we  not,  my  friends, 
expressly  told  '  Egypt  shall  be  the  basest  of  the  kingdoms,' — 'that  there 
shall  be  no  prince  in  all  the  land  of  Egypt  V  Truly  the  sceptre  has 
departed  from  her ;  her  chariots,  and  her  horsemen,  pomp  and  noise, 
pride  and  mighty  power,  where  are  they  now  1  Ruins  of  temf)les, 
pyramids,  and  kingly  tombs,  alone  proclaim  her  ancient  glory  and 
vast  magnificence. 

"But,  oh  !  my  friends,  the  house  of  Jacob  shall  endure  for  ever  ;  for 
the  inspired  volume  has  declared  that  of  the  royal  seed  of  David,  Shiloh 
came,  whose  kingdom  is  an  everlasting  kingdom,  and  of  the  increase  of 
whose  government  and  peace  there  is  no  end.  And  most  assuredly  I  do 
believe,  that  equally  different  at  the  present  day  are  those  who  dwell  in 
spiritual  Egypt,  whose  treasures  are  in  earth  and  earthly  things, 
who,  worshipping  the  god  of  this  world  find  him»  a  hard  and 
cruel  taskmaster,  from  the  spiritual  of  Jacob,  the  true  and  faithful 
Israel  of  God,  who  bow  before  the   King  immortal  and  invisible, 


190 


1835. 


[mt.  48. 


ing  delight."  She  returned  by  way  of  Baltimore  to 
Philadelphia,  where  she  took  leave  of  Friends,  to  many 
of  whom  she  had  become  closely  attached  in  gospel 
fellowship. 

There  was  'one  from  whom  she  had  to  part,  on  quitting 
America,  who  had  become  to  her  both  as  a  daughter 
and  a  sister  in  the  truth,  and  from  whom  it  was  a  trial 
of  no  ordinary  magnitude  to  separate.  The  natural  and 
spiritual  friendship  which  had  so  remarkably  sprung  up 
between  herself  and  E.  P.  Kirkbride  had  been  cemented 

the  aloue  wise  God  our  Saviour,  those  who  are  learning  hourly  of  Him 
whose  yoke  is  easy  and  whose  burden  light,  and  thus  obtaining  rest 
unto  their  souls.  As  marked  the  difference  at  this  vei'y  day  as  when  the 
land  of  Egypt  was  involved  in  darkness  (a  darkness  to  he  felt),  and  there 
was  light  in  all  the  tents  of  Israel.  And,  oh  !  my  friends,  it  is  a  solemn 
truth,  that  the  multitude  have  ever  hasted  to  do  evil  ;  a  chosen  few  have 
in  all  ages  formed  the  Church  of  Christ,  and  when  we  stand  before  his 
awful  bar,  where  liy  his  hohj  law  we  shall  be  tried,  vain  will  be  it  for 
any  one  of  us  to  plead  the  customs  of  a  world  that  lies  in  wickedness. 

"  Let  us,  then,  put  the  question  to  owv  hearts  ;  it  is  an  awful  one,  my 
friends — a  very  awful  one  indeed,  to  every  one  of  us — Had  we  been 
living  in  the  day  when  the  dear  Son  of  God  took  flesh  and  dwelt  among 
men,  should  we  have  been  among  the  feio  who  left  their  nets  at  his 
command  and  followed  Him,  or  of  the  multitude,  who,  when  He  rode  in 
triumph  to  Jerusalem,  cried  out  indeed  '  Hosannah  in  the  highest ,' 
but  who  when  the  tide  of  popular  opinion  changed,  were  just  as  ready 
to  raise  the  cry,  '  Crucify  him!  crucify  him  ! '  'We  will  have  no  king 
but  Cresar?'  He  came  unto  his  own,  and  his  own  received  Him  not ; 
but  to  as  many  as  did  receive  Him,  to  theyyi  gave  He  power  to  become 
the  sons  of  God.  Then,  oh  !  my  friends,  let  us  take  heed  that  we  be  found 
of  God's  own  Israel,  that  our  allotment  may  not  be  among  the  kings 
and  princes,  captains  and  mighty  men,  whose  empire  being  only  of  this 
world,  with  all  its  pomps,  must  crumble  into  dust :  for  these  the 
apostle  saw,  without  the  Holy  City,  calling  upon  the  mountains  and 
the  rocks  to  fall  on  them  and  hide  them  from  the  wrath  of  God  and  of 
the  Lamb  ;  whereas  the  seed  of  Jacob  and  the  house  of  David,  those 
who  had  worshipped  Him  whose  kingdom  is  an  everlasting  kingdom, 
and  whose  dominion  shall  endure  for  ever,  were  seen  within  the  New 
Jerusalem,  the  Holy  City,  clothed  in  white  robes  and  with  palms  in  their 
hands,  ascribing  unto  God  and  to  the  Lamb,  glory  and  honour,  thanks- 
giving and  power,  might,  majesty,  and  dominion,  world  without  end. 
Amen." 


MT.  48.]  1835.  191 

by  more  than  three  years  of  ahnost  unbroken  compa- 
nionship in  tlie  midst  of  suffering  and  conflict.  Although 
now  parted  for  a  time,  yet  were  they  permitted  again 
to  share  not  only  many  a  grief  and  many  a  toil  during 
the  few  remaining  years  of  their  joint  pilgrimage, 
but  also  to  enjoy  much  of  social  happiness  together. 

In  company  with  her  friend  Anna  Thorn,  who  was 
about  to  pay  a  religious  visit  to  England,  H.  C.  Back- 
house sailed  from  New  York  on  the  8th  of  Tenth  month, 
and,  after  a  passage  of  eighteen  days  (rapid  at  a  time, 
when  no  steamers  had  yet  crossed  the  Atlantic),  she 
landed  at  Liverpool,  where  she  was  greeted  on  the  Quay 
by  her  husband  and  daughters,  after  a  separation  of 
more  than  five  years  from  the  latter  :  to  whom  it  was  an 
unspeakable  joy  to  behold  her  so  unchanged  by  the 
vicissitudes  and  the  many  new  interests  of  her  American 
life. 


192 


1835. 


[/KT.  48. 


CHAPTER  XIII. 

DEATH   OF   HER   SISTER   BARCLAY— STATE  OF  THE    SOCIETY  HER  SON 

henry's   death— YEARLY   MEETING  OF  1836  VISITS  SCOTLAND, 

&C.  REMARKS     ON     KEEPING     ANNIVERSARIES  CONCERN  FOR 

NORFOLK  LETTERS  VISITS   BRIGHOUSE  MONTHLY  MEETING. 

On  her  arrival  on  English  ground,  H.  C.  Backhouse 
first  heard  of  the  death  of  her  beloved  sister  Elizabeth, 
the  wife  of  Robert  Barclay  of  Leyton,  tidings  which  she 
received  with  calmness,  being  evidently  not  unprepared 
for  the  event. 

To  Emma  Peask. 

Liverpool,  26th  of  10th  mo.,  1835. 

My  DEAREST  Emma, 

It  is  a  great  comfort  to  be  once  more  with  my 
dear  husband  and  daughters,  and  with  a  mind  so  peaceful  as 
to  hush  any  feeling  of  regret  that  my  absence  from  home  has 
prevented  all  further  intercourse  with  a  precious  and  dearly 
beloved  sister.  When  I  looked  towards  her,  particularly  on  the 
voyage,  I  felt  I  had  nothing  to  do  but  to  love  her ;  now  she 
is  removed  from  the  deep  sufferings  of  her  day,  and  rests,  I 
believe,  where  in  a  few  more  fleeting  days  or  years,  I  trust,  we 
shall  all  rest  together,  on  the  bosom  of  Hira  where  even 
in  time  we  have  found  it  sweet  to  repose. 

The  events  of  the  next  few  months  will  be  best 
described  by  her  own  pen,  in  letters  written  some  time 
after  to  her  friends  in  America. 


49.] 


1830. 


193 


To   . 

Polam,  4th  mo.,  183f). 

^Y  DEAR  Friend, 

*  *  -x-  *  J  staid  a  few  days  at  Liverpool, 
but  shortly  left  it  and  attended  the  funeral  of  Thomas 
Richardson  of  Sunderland,  a  valuable  brother-in-law ;  which 
gave  me  the  opportunity  of  being  a  few  hours  with  the  Friends 
of  our  neighbourhood  before  I  went  forward  to  see  my  dear 
mother  and  sons,  whom  it  was  a  great  comfort  to  find  so  well, 
and  that  Divine  regard  had  evidently  been  richly  extended 
towards  them.  It  was  deeply  interesting  being  with  them, 
and  with  the  acquaintances  of  my  childhood  in  that  part  of 
the  country.  I  also  spent  some  little  time  with  the  family  at 
Leyton,  near  London,  which  was  vei'y  atFecting ;  yet  it  was  a 
comfort  to  see  my  dear  brother  and  the  children  bearing  their 
affliction  in  a  very  exemplary  manner,  and  the  order  that 
was  evidently  the  fruit  of  much  pious  care  remarkably  con- 
tinuing among  them.  Thomas  Shillitoe  appeared  to  be  de- 
clining, but  was  very  kind  arid  affectionate,  and  so  I  can 
truly  say  were  all  I  met  with.  We  had  a  pleasant  visit  at 
Dykes  Alexander's  of  Ipswich,  on  our  way  to  London,  and 
we  were  also  with  Sarah  Grubb,  at  Sudbury, — a  relieving 
visit,  I  believe,  to  both  of  us.  I  could  not  but  observe,  in 
most  places,  an  eye  turned  upon  me  to  see  what  I  was ;  and 
many  have  been  glad  to  find  that  my  views  arc  the  same  as 
when  I  was  allowed  to  go  to  America.  These  are  troublous 
times,  there  can  be  no  manner  of  doubt.  I  thought  it  my  duty 
to  attend  the  Quarterly  Meeting  of  Lancashire  on  our  return 
home :  there  is  dissimilarity  of  view,  and  still  greater  of 
feeling,  subsisting  there,  which  probably  must  lead  to  some 
leaving  the  society,  as  their  attempts  to  change  its  views  will 
no  doubt  prove  unsuccessful.  It  is  a  great  trial,  not  only  of 
the  principles  but  virtue  of  Friends,  and  I  fear  more  for  their 
virtue  than  their  principles.  To  defend  a  right  cause  in  a 
right  spirit,  in  religious  controversy,  is  probably  one  of  the 
hardest  lessons  for  the  human  mind.  I  have  had  to  think  of 
the  saying,  "  Better  is  he  that  ruleth  his  spirit  than  he  that 
taketh  a  city."    *    *    *  * 

The  ensuing  Yearly  Meeting  will  most  likely  be  a  very 
important  one ;   perhaps   no  engagement  of  my  life  ever 

o 


194 


183G. 


[-■ET.  49. 


appeared  more  awful  tlian  that  of  attending  it.  I  desire  to 
avoid  party  feeling,  and  questions  that  do  but  gender  strifes, 
and  to  keep  close  to  a  refuge  which  has  never  yet  failed  me. 
Were  it  not  for  this  refuge,  for  myself,  and  for  the  society 
generally,  nothing  but  dismay  could  be  ours.  Oh,  may  the 
hands  be  hallovred  that  support  the  ark  !  I  have  more  fear 
that  this  may  be  wanting  than  on  any  other  ground;  for  I  am 
persuaded  that  the  principles  professed  by  our  early  Friends, 
as  manifested  in  the  public  documents  of  the  Society,  will 
bear  the  strictest  investigation ;  and  though  the  writings  of 
individuals  are  probably  not  faultless,  yet  as  a  whole,  they 
bear  the  most  unequivocal  testimony  to  the  faith  of  the 
Apostles,  a  belief  in  the  Father,  Son,  and  Holy  Spirit,  the 
baptism  into  whose  name  can  alone  make  members  of  the 
Church  militant  or  triumphant. 

We  have  been  now  several  weeks  comfortably  settled  at 
home,  and  do  indeed  feel  it  a  privilege  to  be  with  our  family 
and  near  relations.    *    *    *  * 

To   .* 

*  *  *  *  Thy  animated  zeal  to  so  late  a 
period  of  life,  in  the  things  that  concern  the  welfare  of  our 
Society,  and  the  good  of  mankind  generally  ;  is  peculiarly 
cheering  and  instructive,  and  I  have  no  doubt  leads  thee,  in 
thy  retired  moments,  to  seek  help  for  others  as  well  as  for 
thyself,  from  the  Helper  of  Israel,  through  whose  strength 
and  wisdom  the  kingdom  of  the  dear  Son  of  God  can  alone 
be  exalted  on  earth,  and  the  delusions  of  the  subtle  adversary 
of  all  good  be  discovered  and  defeated.  Never  was  there  a 
day  when  we  had  need  more  earnestly  to  seek  this  wisdom 
and  this  strength ;  for  surely  the  adversary  has  come  up  to 
the  very  gates  of  the  city,  and  is  besieging  her  not  in  one 
quarter  only,  but  in  all.  However,  fearful  as  the  signs  of  the 
times  are,  her  King  is  yet  in  the  midst  of  her,  and  does  not 
forsake  the  poor  of  his  people,  his  humble  and  depending 
little  ones.  These  we  know  will  have  the  victory,  though 
their  faith  and  patience  may  be  closely  ti'ied, — though  they 
may  have  many  conflicts  and  grievous  threatenings  to  endure: 


*  Prolialily  Abigail  Eaj-ker. 


a:t.  49.] 


1830. 


195 


the  horse  and  liis  rider  shall  still  be  cast  into  the  sea  by  the 
power  of  Israel's  God.  Who  are  of  Israel,  and  who  are  not, 
can  only  be  fully  known  to  the  Searcher  of  hearts,  and  must 
be  left  to  his  judgment.  *  *  *  *  But  I  must  own  that  I 
look  for  suffering  not  wholly  from  this  quarter,  but  almost  as 
much  from  unhallowed  and  undiscriminating  zeal  in  defend- 
ing a  good  cause,  a  cause  that  must  not  be  measured  by  the 
confines  of  our  Society,  and  which  I  can  consider  to  be  nothing 
else  than  the  whole  truth  as  it  is  in  Jesus,  independent  of 
party  or  sect.  This  was  the  station  that  I  always  believed 
that  admirable  man  George  Fox  took,  and  which  has  ever 
been  taken  by  his  true  followers,  since  his  day  to  the  present 
time,  and  which  we  must  continue  to  take,  if  we  are  to  stand 
as  a  religious  Society  in  this  day  of  close  searching.  *  *  * 
But  I  may  now  take  leave  of  a  subject,  with  which — though 
it  is  of  too  general  interest  and  too  much  importance  to  be 
disregarded — I  like  to  occupy  my  mind  as  little  as  possible, 
wishing  to  keep  myself  clear  from  anything  like  bias  or  party 
feeling.  Our  immediate  circle  of  near  connexions,  and  I  trust, 
our  Meeting  also,  are  as  free  from  these  troubles  as  could  be 
expected  in  such  a  general  state  of  inquiry.    *    *    *  * 

But  not  long  was  she  thus  permitted  to  enjoy  the 
dehghts  of  home.  Accompanied  by  her  husband  and 
daughters,  she  again  left  it  to  go  to  Sunderland,  New- 
castle, and  Shields.  Various  meetings  and  families  were 
visited  in  the  course  of  this  journey,  during  which  her 
ministry  was  often  such  as  to  leave  no  common  impres- 
sion on  those  who  heard  it.  Her  engagements  were 
now  almost  unremitting  :  one  duty  accomplished,  others 
followed  in  quick  succession,  and  a  field  of  labour  once 
entered  upon  unexpectedly  enlarged  as  she  proceeded 
in  the  work.  Perhaps  it  is  not  strange,  that,  both  to 
herself  and  to  her  fiiends,  it  seemed  at  times  hardly 
possible  that  such  a  continual  sacrifice  of  domestic  com- 
fort could  be  required  of  her  ;  and  in  the  conflict  of  mind 
which  these  questionings  involved  it  was  not  always 
easy  to  her  to  disceru  where  her  duty  really  lay,  earnest 

o2 


196 


1836. 


[jet.  49. 


as  were  her  desires  to  do  only  that  which  was  right. 
For  this  she  was  ready  to  make  any  sacrifice, — to  en- 
counter any  difficulty ;  but  it  might  be,  that  the  obscurity 
of  vision,  the  conflict  of  soul,  was  a  permitted  means 
to  keep  humble  this  devoted  follower  of  her  Lord.  The 
dispensation  was  humiliating,  and  the  sufferings  endured 
in  these  questionings  excited  the  close  sympathy  of  her 
friends,  but,  perhaps,  could  only  be  fully  known  (as  she 
often  expressed  it,)  to  the  Searcher  of  hearts.  Often 
when  the  trial  was  most  severe  were  her  services  more 
especially  owned  :  many  of  these  occasions  were  times 
of  refreshment,  followed  by  a  delicious  calm,  in  which 
her  beaming  smile  bespoke  the  tranquil  happiness  of  her 
own  mind,  and  diffused  it  to  those  around.  But  we 
must  follow  her  again  in  her  trials,  and  a  great  one  now 
succeeded.  Her  eldest  surviving  son  Henry,  never  a 
very  strong  child,  was  taken  ill  at  school  in  the  spring 
of  the  year  :  his  indisposition  occasioned  uneasiness,  but 
did  not  excite  alarm.  J.  and  H.  C.  Backliouse  were  at 
Kendal,  attending  the  Quarterly  Meeting,  and  had  begun 
a  visit  to  the  families  of  that  place,  when  an  express 
arrived,  informing  them  that  their  son's  illness  had 
assumed  an  alarming  character.  The  following  letters 
describe  the  close  : — 

To  E,  P,  KiRKBRIDE. 
Tottenham,  near  London,  19tli  of  4th  mo.,  1836. 

My  dearly  beloved  Friend, 

How  often  hast  thou  been  in  my  mind  in  this 
day  of  affliction,  when  we  have  had  to  pass  tlirougli  the  very 
deep  trial  of  parting  with  our  beloved  eldest  son,  just  as  we 
were  hoping,  that,  in  a  few  months'  time,  we  should  take  him 
from  school  to  live  with  us  at  home  !  But  it  is  ordered  other- 
wise, and  no  doubt  wisely  and  most  mercifully ;  for  I  think 
we  may  say,  that,  with  the  eye  of  faitli,  we  have  seen  him 


vET  49.] 


183G. 


197 


admitted,  through  redeeming  love,  into  his  glorious  home  in 
the  mansions  of  eternal  blessedness.  This  morning  we  took 
our  last  leave  of  the  remains ;  heavenly  serenity,  and  a  smile 
of  unutterable  peace,  were  marked  on  the  countenance.  The 
peace  of  God  seemed  poured  upon  us,  in  which  my  dear 
husband  bowed  the  knee  and  returned  thanks.  After  a 
pause,  his  master  gave  us  a  description  of  this  dear  child, 
which  brought  additional  light  and  peace  into  my  soul.* 
We  soon  after  left  the  room,  not  quite  so  quietly  taking  the 
last  look  as  I  should  have  liked,  but  with  very  little  apparent 
emotion.  But  to  keep  to  the  truth,  the  very  truth,  and 
nothing  but  the  truth,  in  every  scene  and  circumstance  of 
life,  with  the  various  temptations  that  abound  in  them  all,  is 
perhaps  not  easily  attained,  or  rather  requires  a  continual 
watchfulness  in  which  even  disciples  are  wanting. 

And  now  I  will  endeavour  to  detail  some  of  the  events 


*  The  foUovdng  letter  received  a  short  time  afterwards,  from  the 
Superintendent  of  Grove  House  School,  gives  an  interesting  description 
of  the  character  of  his  late  pupil. 

*  *  *  *  On  his  first  coming  to  Tottenham,  there  was 
nothing  conspicuous  in  his  conduct  beyond  the  manifestation  of  a  sweet, 
amiable,  and  docile  disposition.  There  were  however  clear  indications 
that  the  good  seed  was  sown  in  his  heart,  which  afterwards  more 
evidently  produced  fruit  to  the  praise  of  the  Heavenly  Husbandman, 
and,  we  trust,  to  the  benefit  of  those  by  whom  he  was  surrounded. 
I  think  I  never  witnessed  a  more  striking  instance  of  genuine  sim- 
plicity of  heart  than  that  exhibited  in  the  conduct  of  your  child.  He 
was  possessed  of  excellent  abilities,  and  had  attained  considerable 
proficiency  in  many  departments  of  his  education,  yet  I  never  observed 
any  indication  of  self-estimation  ;  his  humility  and  unobtrusiveness 
were  quite  characteristic,  and  will  I  believe  be  long  and  instructively 
remembered  by  those  who  had  intimate  opportunity  of  ascertaining 
that  they  were  based  on  that  conviction  of  utter  un worthiness,  which 
the  operation  of  Christian  principle  can  alone  impart. 

I  have  many  times  expressed  my  belief  that  the  first  object  of  his 
desire  was  to  walk  in  the  fear  of  the  Lord  ;  this  was  evinced  by  its 
unfailing  accompaniments,  tenderness  of  conscience  and  suscepti- 
bility, of  heart,  which  he  possessed  in  no  ordinary  degree.  There  was 
an  evident  growth  in  seriousness  and  stability  during  the  last  two 
or  three  yeai-s  of  his  life,    it  is  comforting  and  animating  to  recur 


198 


1836. 


[.tT.  4<). 


preparatory  to  the  close.  My  dear  husband^  who  had  gone 
to  him  upon  the  first  alarm,  was  led  to  believe  that  the 
case  was  one  of  general  delicacy  only,  whi<;h  might  continue 
for  months  ;  so  he  left  him  and  joined  me  on  the  5th  of  this 
month,  at  Lancaster,  where  I  was  pursuing  my  religious 
engagements  with  an  unusual  sense  of  acceptance  in  the 
service.  We  attended  Westmoreland  Quarterly  Meeting, 
held  at  Kendal  on  the  7th,  and  spent  First-day  there ;  but  on 
Third-day  evening,  the  intelligence  reached  us  that  the  dear 
child  had  suddenly  become  much  worse ;  we  set  off,  travelled 
all  night  and  two  days,  and  got  to  the  school  about  six  o'clock 
on  Fifth-day ;  found  he  was  yet  alive,  and  that  my  dear  girls 
had  arrived  an  hour  or  two  before  us. 

I  was  soon  taken  into  the  room  to  behold  the  stamp  of 
death  on  the  countenance ;  but  he  had  been  expecting  us, 
and  it  was  evidently  a  comfort  to  him  to  see  us.  He  told  me 
that  his  cousins  Elizabeth  Fry  and  Samuel  Gurney  had  been  to 
see  him  that  morning.  The  former  had  supplicated  for  him, 
and  afterwards  asked  him  if  he  felt  peace  and  reconciliation 
through  Jesus  Christ ;  I  understood  his  answer  was,  "  That 
is  a  close  question."  The  evening  passed  in  a  state  of  great 
restlessness  and  violent  sickness.  It  was  a  bitter  cup,  but  my 
God  was  near,  and  marvellously  supported  me  with  his  peace 
and  presence,  so  as  to  remove  almost  all  natural  excitement, 
and  enable  me  once  or  twice  to  say  a  word  or  two  with 

to  his  diligent  aud  regular  perusal  of  the  Holy  Scriptures,  aud 
the  lively  interest  that  he  manifested  in  their  contents.  It  was  his 
regular  practice  to  spend  portions  of  every  day  in  religious  retirement. 
I  have  repeatedly,  unconsciously  to  himself,  noticed  him  withdrawn 
from  his  amusements  or  recreations  for  this  purpose  :  and  I  cannot 
doubt  it  was  specially  blessed  to  him ;  a  sweet  solemnity  was  often 
depicted  on  his  countenance,  on  his  return  from  these  opportunities. 
In  his  ordinary  intercourse  were  beautifully  blended  innocent  cheer- 
fulness and  a  watchfulness  not  to  ofifend  with  his  tongue.  His  unifoiin 
gentleness  and  kindness  were  conspicuous. 

I  am  desu-ous  of  abstaining  from  anything  approaching  to  eulogy  or 
exaggerated  statement.  His  life  was  a  practical  evidence  that  his 
heart  was  i-enewed  by  divine  grace,  and  that  it  was  imbued  with  the 
love  of  his  Saviour. 

Your  friend,  sincerely, 

Thomas  Binks. 


.tT.  I'J.] 


183G. 


199 


regard  to  his  sufi'erings,  and  my  confidence  that  he  would 
soon  be  removed  from  them  into  glory.  He  asked  us  to 
read  :  I  chose  the  23rd  Psalm,  and  then  spoke  of  our  God 
being  with  him  in  the  valley  of  tlie  shadow  of  death,  anoint- 
ing his  head  with  oil,  and  causing  his  cup  to  flow  over  with 
everlasting  praises  to  the  Lord  God  and  the  Lamb.  I  thought 
he  was  comforted,  and  he  requested  more  reading.    *    *  * 

The  assurance  of  my  soul  increased,  that  our  Lord  and 
Master  would  take  him  to  glory.  *  *  *  At  half-past 
three  o'clock  on  Seventh  day,  the  scene  closed. 

On  First-day  morning,  we  retired  into  the  sitting-room, 
and  read  the  15th  chapter  of  the  1st  Epistle  to  the  Corin- 
thians, and  never  were  so  rejoicingly  brought  home  to  rae 
the  bright  hopes  and  glorious  truths  it  contains ;  so  we 
employed  the  two  meeting  hours  under,  I  believe  I  may  say, 
a  canopy  of  Divine  love  that  humbled  our  souls,  and  was  as 
the  precious  ointment  poured  forth  to  the  healing  of  our 
wounds.  In  the  evening,  we  assembled  in  the  dining-room 
with  all  the  school-boys.  It  was  a  solemn  time,  and  I  trust 
may  be  remembered  by  the  family  and  dear  children  to  their 
benefit. 

****** 
The  sense  of  the  great  loss  to  us  of  so  precious  a  child 
seemed  to  increase  upon  me  as  I  returned  to  the  school-gates, 
just  at  the  hour  I  had  entered  them  a  week  before.  I  believe 
I  may  say  a  flood  of  heavenly  consolation  overflowed  my  saul 
part  of  the  remainder  of  the  evening, — a  draught  of  the  river 
of  pleasure  for  evermore. 

Tottenham,  18th  of  4th  mo.,  1836. 

My  dearest  Mother, 

*  *  *  *  It  is  a  very  great  loss,  but  I  have 
been  remarkably  favoured  with  the  persuasion  of  my  dear 
child  being  safely  landed  in  his  heavenly  inheritance,  and 
that  the  few  years  that  stand  between  us  will  soon  be  passed ; 
not  that  the  earth  and  its  many  remaining  treasures  are  not 
now  thoroughly  prized,  and  even  at  this  moment  of  grief 
enjoyed  by  me.  I  believe  I  never  before  knew  so  much  of 
that  faith,  which  is  the  substance  of  things  hoped  for,  and 


200  1837.  [.ET.  50. 

the  evidence  of  things  not  seen.  And  what  are  things  hoped 
for  ?  Surely  the  communion  of  saints  is  one  ;  a  re-union  of 
the  living  that  have  lived  to  God.  And  what  is  this  evidence 
of  things  not  seen,  but  that  peace  and  joy  that  cover  the 
heart  and  animate  it  with  some  faint  sense  of  the  estate  of 
the  blessed.  But  truly,  when  I  return  to  the  feelings  of 
that  tabernacle  in  which  we  now  dwell,  my  mind  aches  under 
the  vacuum ;  and  sorrow,  in  the  remembrance  of  things  that 
are  sweet  and  past,  covers  my  soul.    *    *    *  * 


After  this,  H.  C.  Backhouse  went  to  her  mother's, 
at  the  Grove,  and  remained  there  until  the  Yearly 
Meeting,  which  she  attended,  and  in  which,  with  Chris- 
tian boldness  and  discretion,  she  steadfastly  maintained 
the  principles  and  practices  of  our  religious  Society, 
which  w^ere  at  that  time  attacked  by  many,  especially 
with  reference  to  Gospel  ministry  and  spiritual  worship. 
A  few  meetings  were  held  on  her  way  home  ;  that 
at  Belper,  near  Derby,  was  a  memorable  one.  She 
had  spoken  with  great  power  and  earnestness  on  the 
divinity  of  our  Saviour.  It  was  afterwards  ascertained 
that  this  meeting  had  been  attended  by  several  Unitarians 
of  considerable  influence  among  the  manufacturing 
population  of  the  neighbourhood.  To  this  succeeded  a 
time  of  rest  in  the  quiet  enjoyment  of  her  home. 

In  the  Seventh  month,  she  returned  her  certificate, 
and  again  asked  for  one  to  attend  the  Half-year's 
meeting  at  Aberdeen,  and  to  hold  meetings  on  the 
coast,  and  in  the  neighbourhood  of  Darlington.  Her 
husband  was  liberated  to  accompany  her,  but  was 
prevented  doing  so  by  a  slight  attack  of  paralysis  ; 
in  consequence  of  which,  she  undertook  the  journey 
without  him,  and  accomplished  the  service  satisfactorily, 
having  for  her  helper  and  companion  her  beloved 
friend  Eliza  Kirkbride,  who  had  most  seasonably 
just  arrived  from  America,  on  a  visit  to  her.     In  the 


.KT.  50.] 


1837. 


201 


Twelfth  month  of  the  same  year,  II.  C.  Backhouse  accom- 
panied her  friend  Mary  Fell  in  her  religious  service  in 
some  meetings  within  Durham  Quarterly  Meeting.  This 
engagement  prevented  her  being  with  her  mother  at  the 
Grove  at  the  time  of  the  anniversary  of  her  father's 
death,  when  her  company  would  have  been  especially 
desirable  to  her  dear  surviving  parent.  In  reference  to 
this  circumstance  she  makes  the  following  instructive 
remarks  in  a  letter  to  her  : — 

So  again  I  have  to  remember  language  that  I  believe  I 
may  in  humility  apply  to  myself :  "  When  thou  wast  young 
thou  girdedst  thyself  and  walkedst  whither  thou  wouldst ;  but 
when  thou  art  old  another  shall  gird  thee  and  carry  thee 
whither  thou  wouldst  not."  How  often  have  I  striven,  for 
many  years  past^  to  spend  the  2oth  as  I  could  desire  !  But  all 
my  striving  has  been  in  vain,  and  circumstances  the  very 
opposite  to  my  inclinations  have  almost  invariably  been  my 
allotment^  bringing  me  home  to  the  root  of  the  matter, — 
that,  in  accordance  with  the  principles  of  Friends,  days 
and  times  are  not  to  be  observed ;  things  belonging  to 
that  eternity  where  there  is  no  night — having  nothing  to  do 
with  time  and  its  measurements.  So  I  have  ever  experi- 
mentally found  that  the  most  sacred  feelings  of  the  mind, 
arising  from  love  to  God  and  man,  appear  almost  wholly 
independent  of  the  things  of  this  world.  Nevertheless,  I  am 
fully  aware  that  natural  temperament  may  have  much  to  do 
with  sensibility  to  associations,  and  that  it  varies  in  different 
individuals.  I  believe  thou  hast  the  power  of  feeling  it  much 
more  than  myself,  and  that  in  the  recurrence  of  this  season 
of  the  year  thou  claimest  our  tendei-est  sympathies,  which  we 
can  truly  say  (little  as  I  often  express  them)  thou  hast  at  all 
times.    *    *    *  * 

To  Maria  Fox. 

Norwich,  3rd  of  1st  mo.,  1837. 

My  beloved  Cousin, 

I  wish  I  had  now  thy  last  kind  and  interesting 
letter  by  mc  to  read  over  again,  that  this  might  be  more  of 


202 


1837. 


[*T.  50. 


an  answer  to  it  ;  but  liaviug  the  opportunity,  it  is  very 
pleasant  to  me  to  avail  myself  of  it,  to  have  a  little  inter- 
course with  thee.  How  especially  should  I  enjoy  to  have 
thee  by  me  this  cold  day,  when  the  fireside  is  so  agreeable, 
and  would  be  rendered  doubly  so  by  thy  presence  ;  for  I  have 
a  very  old  and  old-fashioned  affection  for  thee,  which  began 
in  early  days,  when  we  did  not  well  understand  its  origin ; 
but  now  when  so  many  years  of  our  lives  have  past,  in  which 
I  believe  we  may  say  the  principal  business  of  them  has  been 
that  of  endeavouring  to  become  acquainted  with  the  law  of 
love  and  to  live  under  it,  happily  I  do  not  find  my  affectionate 
regard  towards  thee  in  any  degree  diminished,  but  feeling 
more  assured  of  its  permanence  and  stability,  I  can  rejoice 
that  we  are  yet  permitted  to  sympathize  with  each  other  in 
the  trials  and  consolations  attendant  on  our  pilgrimage  :  in 
both  of  these  we  have  surely  participated  in  large  measure. 
Our  visible  trials  have  not  been  few,  but  I  believe  we  shall 
both  be  ready  to  acknowledge  that  our  more  hidden  ones 
liave  had  as  much  in  them  of  that  burning  which,  we  may 
without  presumption  believe,  is  caused  by  the  fire  of  the 
Lord's  jealousj^  Oh  !  these  minds  of  ours,  what  suffering 
they  have  to  pass  through  before  the  dross  and  tin  and  repro- 
bate silver  shall  be  purely  purged  away  !  In  this  reprobate 
silver  I  have  sometimes  included  unhallowed  religious  per- 
formances— silver  they  are  called,  though  reprobate — and  as 
such  by  the  law,  not  fit  to  bear  the  image  of  the  King;  but 
the  author  of  all  lies  and  counterfeits  has  power  to  put  some- 
thing so  like  the  right  stamp  upon  it,  that  it  deceives  the 
superficial  observer,  and  can  hardly  be  detected  but  by  its 
wanting  weight.  So  it  is  evidently  a  day  in  our  religious 
Society,  when  we  stand  greatly  in  need  of  well-poised  balances, 
first  for  the  trial  of  ourselves  and  our  deeds,  and  then  no 
doubt  as  a  Church ;  but  we  must  remember  that  unerring 
balances  are  only  in  the  hand  of  Him  who  cannot  err.  Yet 
in  the  confidence  that  He  still  visits  us  as  a  people  with  his 
Spirit,  and  that  that  Spirit  is  a  spirit  of  judgment,  I  trust  we 
may  be  preserved  from  the  use  of  that  reprobate  silver,  with 
which,  for  so  many  centuries  past,  the  arch-enemy  of  souls 
has  corrupted  professing  Christendom,  and  out  of  which 
corruption,  I  believe  the  Society  of  Friends,  or  those  among 


50.]  1837.  'iOl'j 

them  who  liave  been  faithful  to  their  priuciples^  have  been 
made  instrumental  (and  are  yet  designed  to  be  made  instru- 
mental) in  bringing  it.  But  the  mystery  of  iniquity  is  great, 
as  well  as  the  mystery  of  godliness.  Well,  it  seems  as  if  the 
destroyer  was  endeavouring  to  lay  us  waste  by  his  most 
subtle  machinations.  May  we  be  clear  of  all  railing  accusa- 
tions even  against  his  emissaries,  only  adopting  the  language 
of  the  Archangel,  "  The  Lord  rebuke  thee  I  am  some- 
times almost  as  much  afraid  of  myself  and  my  friends  as  of 
those  to  whom  I  cannot  feel  united,  lest  in  our  creaturely 
zeal  for  the  truth  we  should  be  giving  it  a  wound  when  we 
are  not  aware  of  it.  And  yet  I  do  believe  there  must  be  a 
time  when  rightly  prepared  Friends  will  be  called  into  action, 
to  pi'cvent  those  principles  and  practices  which  constitute  us 
a  separate  religious  Society  being  trampled  upon  by  a  wasting, 
desolating  spirit.  This,  were  it  suffered  to  elfect  its  purposes, 
would  destroy  a  community  that  has  enjoyed  much  of  the 
unity  of  the  spirit  in  the  bond  of  peace,  and  has  certainly 
brought  many  very  important  Scripture  truths  to  light,  under 
what  we  can  make  no  doubt  has  been  the  immediate  guidance 
of  the  Holy  Spirit. 

But  I  have  no  thought  that  this  will  ever  be  the  case, 
unless  w  e  virtually  or  absolutely  deny  Him  whom  we  have 
ever  acknoAvledged  to  be  alone  worthy  to  be  the  Ruler  of 
his  people,  having  given  Himself  for  them.  I  would  rather 
believe  that  (though  it  is  a  time  of  close  sifting,  and  many 
may  be  driven  from  us),  those  who  remain  will  be  brought  to 
a  more  perfect  knowledge  of  Christian  truth,  and  that 
humility  in  which  there  is  a  willingness  to  act  up  to  it ;  so 
that,  though  our  numbers  may  be  sorrowfully  lessened,  we 
shall  lose  nothing  in  weight  and  true  excellency.  Yet,  well 
may  we  exclaim  with  the  Prophet,  "  Who  shall  abide  the 
day  of  the  Lord  ?    Who  shall  stand  when  he  appeareth  1"  *  * 

H.  C.  Backhouse. 

Early  in  1837,  H.  C.  Backliouse  applied  to  her 
Monthly  Meeting  for  liberty  to  pay  a  religious  visit  to 
parts  of  Norfolk,  and  the  adjacent  counties.  It  did 
not  appear  to  Friends  that  the  time  was  come  for  this 


204 


1837. 


[jet.  50. 


engagement,  and  it  was  accordingly  deferred.  Whilst 
the  permission  to  remain  at  home  was  in  one  sense  not 
unwelcome,  there  was  no  small  degree  of  humiliation 
accompanying  it,  and  the  burden  could  not  be  wholly 
laid  aside.    On  this  occasion  she  writes  : — 

I  have  been  more  afraid  of  bringing  any  discredit  upon 
the  society  by  my  blunders  than  of  any  suffering  they  may 
lead  me  into.  Certainly  some  close  self-examination  has 
been  the  result^  and  my  conclusion  is  tbat^  if  the  dispen- 
sation be  rightly  abode  under,  it  may  do  me  good  and  was  no 
doubt  desirable.  I  do  not  mean  by  being  rightly  abode 
under  that  I  should  be  low  or  discouraged  beyond  measure, 
for  this  I  believe  was  not  designed  by  it,  but  that  a  time  of 
more  rest  from  religious  engagements,  leaving  me  leisure  to 
improve  my  own  mind  and  fulfil  my  domestic  duties,  might 
be  my  best  present  allotment.  Indeed  I  am  glad  of  the  rest, 
tbough  at  the  expense  of  some  humiliation,  which  however 
may  be  the  best  part  of  it ;  so  that  I  hope  you  will  not  blame 
our  meeting,  or  think  we  have  suffered  beyond  what  we  really 
have  by  its  decision. 

To  

Polam  Hill,  7tli  of  3rd  mo.,  1837. 

My  dear  Friend, 

*  *  *  *  Thou  mayst  ask  what  makes  me  so 
sober— truly  I  cannot  account  for  the  depression  that  is  so 
often  my  portion.  I  could  desire  to  be  a  little  more  cheerful 
than  I  frequently  feel  myself  to  be,  for  the  sake  of  those  that 
surround  me,  and  yet  I  believe  these  feelings  are  given  in 
mercy,  and  for  that  preservation  in  poverty  of  spirit  which  is 
also  in  itself  a  mercy.  Still  there  may  be  secondary  causes 
(not  less  in  all- wise  ordering),  which  in  some  degree  may  be 
the  occasion  of  it, — a  succession  of  events  giving  me  con- 
tinually to  feel  the  precarious  tenure  on  Avhich  I  hold  so 
many  precious  ties  to  earth  as  I  yet  possess, — the  natural 
constitution  of  my  body,  with  the  exertions  that  it  has 
passed  through,  produce  a  languor  in  which  the  mind  is  apt  to 


-F.T.  50.] 


1837. 


205 


fall  back  upon  itself,  and  soe  things  darkened  by  the  veil  of 
the  flesh.  Not  that  I  am  in  ill  health,  but  I  seldom  pass  a 
day  without  feelings  of  weariness  and  dulness,  which' are  in 
themselves  painful.  Still  perhaps  I  do  not  sufficiently  culti- 
vate the  virtue  of  thankfulness,  and  petition  enough  for  that 
excellent  gift  that  "  hopeth  all  things,  believeth  all  things/' 
&c.  I  am  not  aware  that  the  general  state  of  things  in  our 
religious  Society  has  any  especial  effect  on  my  mind.  I  have 
always  been  of  the  opinion  that  we  have  nothing  to  do  with  the 
public  but  by  commission,  and  that  when  that  commission  is 
over  we  may  leave  others,  and  should  leave  others,  to  their 
own  Judge  and  Master.  Still,  I  sometimes  think  that  before 
commission  tliere  is  a  preparation  for  it,  and  that  if  all  were 
smoother  with  us  than  it  now  assuredly  is,  there  might  he  a 
more  general  and  individual  feeling  of  rejoicing  ;  but  I  think 
we  must  be  careful  not  to  give  the  character  of  prophetic 
sorrow  to  every  casual  feeling  of  mental  depression  that  we 
cannot  well  account  for.  It  is  a  day  of  close  sifting,  and  I 
believe  we  must  endeavour  to  be  humble  enough  to  learn 
even  from  our  enemies ;  and  enemies  poor  old-fashioned 
Quakerism  assuredly  has,  but  I  do  not  fear  for  it.  If  faith- 
fulness be  but  the  girdle  of  her  loins,  truth  will  be  seen  to 
be  her  buckler  ;  but  if  pride — spii'itual  pride — creeps  in  for 
ourselves  or  our  profession,  no  strength  is  given  to  wear  that 
buckler,  which  can  alone  be  worn  in  humility.      *    *  * 

H.  C.  Backhouse. 

In  the  Fourth  Month,  witli  a  certificate  for  liolding 
meetings  in  going  and  returning  from  London  Yearly 
Meeting,  slie  accomplished  part  of  the  service  that 
yet  lay  upon  her  mind.  Public  meetings  were  held 
in  Norfolk,  and  among  her  old  friends  and  I'clatives 
she  was  also  frequently  engaged  in  private  religious 
opportunities,  of  a  striking  and  instructive  cha- 
racter. In  the  autumn,  H.  C.  Backhouse  went  into 
Brighouse  Monthly  Meeting,  and  united  with  her 
beloved  friend  Mary  Fell  in  visiting  the  families  of 
Friends  in  the  different  meetings.     In  part  of  the 


206  1837.  [^T.  :,0. 

engagement  she  was  joined  by  her  husband,  and 
together  they  held  many  meetings  in  this  populous 
district. 

Whilst  they  were  in  the  neighbourhood  of  Bradford, 
the  sudden  death  (by  a  fall  from  his  horse)  of  a  medical 
man  of  considerable  practice,  created  a  great  sensation 
among  the  inhabitants.  A  large  concourse  attended 
the  interment,  which  took  place  in  the  Friends'  bur}^- 
ing-ground,  and  one  who  was  present  on  the  occasion 
supplies  an  outKne  of  that  part  of  the  discourse  in  which 
she  was  led  to  plead  with  those  who  deny  the  truths  of 
Christianity.  It  is  rarely  desirable  to  attempt  a  de- 
lineation of  the  kind  ;  but  this  sketch  is  not  only  in- 
structive in  its  matter,  but  may  perhaps  not  unsuitably 
furnish  some  idea  of  the  manner  in  which  she  was  not 
unfrequently  led  to  liandle  deep  and  difficult  subjects  in 
the  authority  of  the  truth. 

"The  utmost  point  to  which  the  infidel  can  go  is  the  em- 
ployment of  all  his  faculties  in  endeavouring  to  disprove  and 
disbelieve  the  existence  of  a  supreme  Being.  I  doubt  whether 
there  be  such  a  thing  as  absolute  unbelief.  Voltaire  himself, 
and  those  about  him,  were  terrified  at  the  approach  of  death. 
What  does  thi.s  terror  indicate  but  a  trembling  unbelief? 
The  devils  also  believe  and  tremble,  and  the  present  occasion 
is  one  which  calls  on  those  who  dare  to  deny  the  Lord  Jesus 
to  ask  themselves,  '  Were  I,  like  this  poor  man,  while  riding 
on  my  horse,  to  be  struck  with  death  in  a  moment,  would  I 
rather  be  a  disciple  of  Jesus,  (little  as  I  know  about  it,  or 
much  as  I  know  about  it,)  or  a  disciple  of  Voltaire  ?  '  But 
he  will  say,  '1  cannot  understand  how  the  death  of  an 
obscure  individual,  almost  2,000  years  ago,  can  affect  the  state 
of  any  one  at  the  present  day.'  Canst  thou  understand  the 
mysterious  union  between  soul  and  body — why  thou  dost 
live  at  the  present  time,  and  move  and  think  and  reason  ? 
Thou  who  hast  most  deeply  studied  the  philosophy  of  mind 
and  the  frame  of  the  human  body  canst  not  answer  these 
questions.     But  the  man  of  science  has  discovered,  and 


.«T.  50.] 


1837. 


207 


knows  beyond  a  doubt,  that  nothing  in  matter  is  lost  ;  that, 
though  dispersed,  it  exists  in  other  forms  ;  and  shall  that 
which  is  of  infinitely  greater  value  than  the  body — the  human 
soul — be  lost  ?  But  he  may  say  that  there  is  not  argument 
sutficient  on  the  side  of  the  believer  in  Divine  revelation. 
Find  then,  in  any  science,  a  chain  of  argument  more  close 
and  satisfactory  than  that  which  proves  the  authenticity  of 
the  sacred  volume.  Only  He  who  knows  the  end  from  the 
beginning  could  possibly  have  been  its  author.  Then  believe 
what  is  written.  But  I  believe  it  is  not  in  the  intellect  of 
man  that  infidelity  has  its  seat,  it  is  in  the  corrupt  heart  of 
man.  It  is  because  our  deeds  would  be  condemned  if  brought 
to  the  light  of  the  Gospel,  that  we  will  not  believe  it."  &c. 

In  some  of  these  public  meetings  the  evidence  of  pro- 
phecy  in  support  of  the  Gospel  Avas  powerfully  brought 
into  view  by  her  in  addressing  unbelievers — a  class 
liut  too  numerous  at  all  times  in  the  manufacturino- 
districts,  and  more  especially  so  in  periods  of  commercial 
depression. 

Leeds,  !)tli  of  lltli  mo.,  18.37. 

My  beloved  Child, 

I  little  looked  for  sucli  a  string  of  questions  as 
thy  last  letter  contained,  and  would  wish  to  answer  tliem 
more  fully  than  I  fear  I  shall  at  present  have  the  opportunity 
for  doing.  But,  before  I  attempt  to  do  so,  I  shall  tell  thee 
that  I  like  thou  shouldst  always  be  very  open  and  free  with  me, 
which  will  be  the  way  for  thee  to  benefit  by  my  experience  ; 
for,  unless  I  am  a  very  fool  indeed,  fifty  years'  experience 
must  have  taught  more  lessons  than  thirteen;  and  I  have  heard 
a  saying  that  those  who  benefit  by  the  experience  of  others 
are  happy, — those  who  benefit  by  their  own  are  wise, — and 
those  who  benefit  by  neither  are  fools.  Now  I  wish  thee  to 
be  very  happy,  and  I  believe  thou  wilt  be  in  the  way  of  being 
so,  and  wise  too,  if  thou  wilt  have  the  humility  to  benefit  by 
the  experience  of  tliy  parents,  and  not  wait  to  benefit  b}^ 
thy  own  ;  for,  thougli  in  the  end  thou  niightst  be  taught 


208 


1838. 


[.t;t.  51. 


wisdom,  it  will  be  at  the  expense  of  much  suffering  and  loss 
of  time,  which  Avoiild  be  avoided  if  "  thou  wilt  hear  the  in- 
struction of  thy  father,  and  if  thou  forsakest  not  the  law  of 
thy  mother and  I  have  no  hesitation  in  saying  "  they  will 
be  as  an  ornament  of  grace  unto  thy  head  and  chains  about 
thy  neck.'' — Prov.  vi.  i.  This  I  hope  may  be  thy  blessed 
experience. 

How  often  have  I  remembered  what  was  said  of  Abraham, 
"  For  I  know  him,  that  he  will  command  his  children  and  his 
household  after  him,  and  they  shall  keep  the  M  ay  of  the  Lord, 
to  do  justice  and  judgment,  that  the  Lord  may  bring  upon 
Abraham  that  which  He  hath  spoken  of  him."  Here  is  no 
reasoning  with  or  entreating  his  children  that  Abraham  was 
commended  for,  but  simply  command! ay ,  and  it  appears  they 
obeyed ;  and  the  God  of  Abraham  was  the  God  of  Isaac,  and 
the  blessing  of  the  Lord  descended  from  one  generation  to 
another,  on  all  that  were  faithful  to  Him.  Now  most 
assuredly  believing  that  it  has  been  in  obedience  to  the  law 
of  our  God,  that  thy  dear  father  and  myself  have  conformed 
to  the  language  and  dress  of  Friends,  and  to  other  important 
views  in  which  Friends  have  differed  from  other  religious 
professors,  and  by  which  they  became  a  separate  society,  we 
cannot  do  otherwise  than  command  our  children  after  us,  to 
do  those  things  which  we  believe  to  be  in  conformity  with 
the  will  of  God,  and  which  will  bear  the  closest  test  they  can 
be  put  to  by  the  letter  and  general  scope  and  spirit  of  the 
scriptures.  But  we  believe  it  not  necessary  for  a  child  to 
make  all  this  examination  before  he  is  obedient  to  his  parents 
in  doing  those  things  which  they  consider  this  law  commands. 
This  is  not  consistent  with  that  government  in  which  all 
things  are  regulated  with  perfect  wisdom.  We  must  first 
obey,  and  afterwards  we  may  be  favoured  to  see  the  reason 
for  the  commandment.  If  thou  wert  to  be  always  asking  the 
reason  why  every  lesson  is  given  thee  and  not  begin  to  learn 
it  till  thou  knew,  very  little  indeed  wouldst  thou  ever  attain ; 
and  so  it  is  in  the  best  knowledge,  as  well  as  in  that  knowledge 
that  belongs  to  the  things  of  this  world.  So  then,  dear 
child,  thou  must  remember  that  when  thou  departest  from 
the  well-known  principles  of  Friends,  thou  art  violating  the 
command  of  thy  parents,  and  therefore  one  of  the  command- 


MT.  51.] 


1838. 


209 


ments, — the  first  with  a  promise  attached  to  it,  "  Honour 
thy  father  and  thy  mother,"  &c.  Well,  I  humbly  hope  thou 
wilt  not  be  persuaded  to  do  so,  and  then,  at  some  suitable 
time,  when  I  trust  we  may  enjoy  being  together,  I  might 
read  some  book  with  thee  explanatory  of  the  views  and 
principles  of  Friends,  and  might  then  be  able  to  answer  any 
observations  thou  mightst  make  upon  them.  I  do  long  more 
than  I  can  say  for  such  hours  to  arrive,  but  in  the  mean  time 
I  desire  we  may  both  try  to  be  patient,  and  endeavour  day 
by  day  to  be  faithful  in  our  various  allotments,  asking  for  a 
daily  supply  of  that  heavenly  nourishment  which  alone  can 
strengthen  the  soul  to  resist  the  temptations  and  overcome 
the  difficulties  that  are  to  be  found  in  every  day  of  our  lives. 

We  expect  to  leave  Leeds  on  Second-day,  but  what  further 
detention  we  may  have  in  this  large  Monthly  Meeting  we  do 
not  yet  know.  I  trust  I  may  be  liberated  before  thy  vacation, 
but  I  always  desire  to  check  anxiety  about  the  futiu'e,  and 
leave  it  to  the  ordering  of  Him  who  alone  knows  what  is  best 
for  us.  Do  write  to  me  again  soon,  and  tell  me  if  thou  likest 
and  understandest  this  letter. 

Bradford,  4th  of  1st  mo.,  1838. 

My  dearly  beloved  Childeex, 

*  *  *  *  Well,  dears  !  there  is  nothing  like 
faithfulness,  either  for  this  life  or  for  the  promise  of,  and  in- 
heritance in  that  which  is  to  come,  and,  with  all  its  costliness, 
I  hope  we  may  be  enabled  to  persevere  in  it,  giving  to  it  (to 
the  end  of  our  career)  all  that  we  have,  even  children,  lands 
and  houses.  Farewell,  dears  !  — May  a  merciful  Father  restore 
us  to  our  children,  even  in  a  measure  of  that  joy  in  which 
Abraham  received  his  son,  as  in  a  figure,  from  the  dead  !  But 
his  time  must  be  waited  for,  or  the  sacrifice  is  not  a  whole 
burnt-offering.  And  still  more  may  you,  my  dearly  beloved 
children,  know  and  serve  the  God  of  your  fathers,  with  a 
perfect  heart  and  an  upright  mind. 

Yours  most  affectionately, 

H.  C.  Backhouse. 

The  visit  to  Leeds  and  Bradford  was  completed  in 

r 


210 


1838. 


[.CT.  51. 


the  beginning  of  this  year.  In  allusion  to  the  return  of 
her  certificate,  H.  C.  Backhouse  writes  : — 

I  informed  the  meeting  that  I  had  had  400 
sittings,  [religious  visits  to  individuals  and  families,]  and 
between  thirty  and  forty  public  meetings — that  the  Lord 
had  helped  us,  and  that  I  had  not  often  remembered  on  any 
previous  occasion  feeling  a  larger  measure  of  the  fulness 
of  the  blessing  of  the  Gospel,  for  which  I  desired  to  be 
humbly  and  reverently  thankful  to  the  Author  of  all  our 
sure  mercies. 

To  Maria  Fox. 

Polam  Hill,  24tli  of  1st  mo.,  1838. 

My  dear  Maria, 

*  *  *  *  Now  I  have  the  comfort  to  say  I 
am  resting  at  home,  and  hope  to  do  so  till  I  can  no  longer 
find  rest  in  it,  and  if  ever  and  whenever  this  is  not  to  be  the 
case,  I  leave  to  that  to-morrow,  for  which  it  is  declared  we 
should  take  no  [anxious]  thought.  It  is  an  inexpressible 
comfort  to  be  now  at  home,  with  a  remarkably  unclouded 
mind  for  me  ;  not  that  I  can  say,  that  nothing  but  perfect 
sunshine  has  been  my  allotment  since  my  return,  about  two 
weeks  ago  ;  for  I  find  if  I  am  not  faithful  in  ray  day's  work, 
even  at  home,  these  clouds  will  arise ;  but  I  do  not  know 
when  I  have  returned  from  any  field  of  labour  with  a  stronger 
evidence  that  it  was  in  the  right  time,  and  that  the  offering, 
if  such  it  may  be  called,  had  been  accepted.    *    *    *  * 

How  I  do  wish  that  all  would  speak  who  are  called  to  do 
80,  and  that  none  of  us  may  speak  but  when  called,  and  then 
neither  too  much  nor  too  little,  and  we  may  wish  all  this 
without  expecting  perfection  either  in  ourselves  or  others. 
It  is  a  day  when  deep  heart-searchings  ought  to  be  ours,  with- 
out giving  way  to  unprofitable  discouragement,  either  for 
ourselves,  our  friends,  or  the  church.  That  the  dulness  of 
our  formal  silences  is  to  be  broken,  no  wonder  ;  but  if  broken 
by  the  activity  of  man,  we  shall  only  substitute  empty  talk 
for  empty  silence ;  and  yet  I  do  assuredly  believe  that  there 
has  been  much  of  empty  silence  among  us,  for  want  of  faith- 
fulness in  abiding  under  those  baptisms  that  would  prepare. 


-CT.  51.] 


1838. 


211 


aud  that  hand  that  would  work  in  us  a  willingness,  both 
to  do  and  suffer  His  will,  aud  which  would  have  qualified 
many,  I  believe,  to  speak  in  a  way  that  would  contribute  to 
give  life  to  silence,  and  to  make  it  a  school  of  preparation 
both  for  prayer  aud  praise,  mental  and  vocal.  I  am  almost 
ready  to  think  our  lamp  as  a  society  must  go  out,  if  the 
dumb  be  not  made  to  speak ;  and  truly  it  is  something  for 
one  to  make  this  acknowledgment,  who  perhaps  thinks  her- 
self as  little  indebted  to  words  as  most,  and  whose  natural 
taste  for  them  thou  knowest  is  not  very  great.     *    *  * 

To  A   FRIEND  IN  AMERICA. 

2nd  mo.,  1838. 

I  have  thought  of  thee  with  so  much  lively 
interest,  that  I  do  not  like  any  longer  to  withhold  the  expres- 
sion of  it.  Would  I  could  converse  with  thee ;  for  then  I 
could  say  many  things  that  it  might  not  be  best  to  put  on 
paper,  though  I  have  no  secrets  about  the  things  we  might 
converse  on  :  and  yet  if  things  are  written,  and  that  perhaps 
not  always  clearly,  they  get  so  misinterpreted  in  this  age  of 
critical  dissection,  that  I  am  afraid  lest,  to  use  a  sti'ong 
expression,  I  should  give  any  occasion  to  the  adA'ersary  to 
blaspheme.  However,  powerful  and  insidious  as  he  is,  the 
comfort  always  is,  his  power  is  a  limited  one,  and  limited  not 
by  ourselves,  but  by  Him  whom  we  desire  to  serve,  and 
therefore  I  do  believe,  if  I  may  be  allowed  the  expressive 
language  of  the  old  school,  if  we  patiently  wait  for  the  arising 
of  his  power,  we  shall  always  eventually  know  the  schemes 
of  the  enemy  defeated,  and  the  victory  given  us,  through 
Jesus  Christ,  whose  power  remains  the  same  at  the  present 
day  as  it  was  in  that  day  when  it  was  declared  that  even  the 
devils  were  subject  unto  him.  I  believe  the  deeper  our  expe- 
rience in  things  spiritual,  the  more  we  shall  be  made  aware, 
not  only  of  a  present  God,  but  of  an  enemy  ever  seeking  to 
destroy  the  works  of  his  creation,  spiritually  as  well  as 
naturally,  and  the  injunction  to  resist  him,  steadfast  in  the 
faith,  may  be  felt  to  be  most  obligatory  by  those  who  have 
known  some  victory  granted  them  over  the  world  and  the 
flesh.    Surely,  I  believe  it  may  be  said,  he  has  set  his  foot 

p  2 


212 


1838. 


[^.T.  51. 


among  m,  and  has  been  discerned  by  the  spirituallj'-minded 
in  the  midst  of  the  children  of  the  Highest.  How  many  he 
has  wounded^  how  many  he  has  prevailed  over,  and  how 
many  have  resisted  him  steadfast  in  the  faith^  can  only  be 
fully  known  to  the  great  Head  of  his  own  Church,  with 
whom  all  judgments  respecting  individuals,  as  to  their  alle- 
giance to  Him,  must  be  left.  But,  as  a  church  united 
together  by  the  acknowledgment  of  the  fundamental  truths 
of  Christianity,  and  the  recognition  of  the  apostolic  doctrine 
of  the  Father,  Son,  and  Holy  Spirit — the  one  great  and 
incomprehensible  Jehovah — yet  holding  peculiar  views  as  to 
the  thorough  working  out  of  this  doctrine  in  the  maxims 
and  practice  of  civil  and  religious  life,  it  has  never  appeared 
to  me  that  we  can  differ  from  these  peculiar  views  of  Friends, 
in  regard  to  the  working  out  of  these  great  truths,  and  yet 
be  rightly  in  connexion  with  them.  That  many  who  have 
been  educated  among  us  do  widely  differ  from  the  practices 
and  principles  of  our  ancestors  we  can  make  no  doubt,  and 
that  they  differ  so  variously,  that  it  would,  I  believe,  be  found 
difficult  to  find  any  two  among  them  who  think  alike,  or  who 
dissent  in  the  same  degree  and  manner  from  us;  so  that 
there  seems  little  bond  of  union  among  them.  Some,  un- 
hesitatingly upbraiding  the  Society  with  holding  most  anti- 
christian  principles,  are  still  so  inconsistent  with  themselves, 
as  to  wish  to  be  retained  as  members,  and  dislike  being  dealt 
with,  because  they  confess  that,  with  all  the  errors  with 
which  we  are  charged,  they  cannot  find  any  other  people 
to  whom  they  can  unite  themselves. 

These  things,  my  dear  friend,  I  can  now  say  from  know- 
ledge :  I  came  from  your  country,  as  I  believe  thou  well 
knowest,  as  far  from  receiving  any  bias  from  party,  as  it  was 
possible  to  do,  and  I  was  received  by  many  for  a  time  with 
great  jealousy.  It  has  since  been  my  lot  to  labour  much 
among  my  friends,  and  certainly  wherever  I  have  found  this 
spirit  that  has  rent  and  divided  us,  I  have  been  greatly 
pained,  and  in  many  instances  have  I  felt  it  when  no  know- 
ledge from  without  informed  me  of  the  state  of  things.  The 
form  which  it  assumes  is  wholly  different  from  [it  might  even 
have  been  said,  opposite  to]  Hicksism  ;  but  its  scattering  effect 
from  the  true  fold  not  in  my  apprehension  very  different. 


MT.  51.] 


1838. 


213 


possibly  more  insidious.  And  yet  mistake  me  not  in  sup- 
posing, that,  of  those  that  remain  among  us,  there  are  not 
some  who  may  be  exposed  to  opposite  temptations,  and  some 
who  fall  by  the  many  temptations  that  are  common  to  the 
Church  in  every  age.  But  one  evil  is  no  apology  for  another, 
nor  will  evil  of  ever  so  opposite  a  nature  subdue  its  antagonist 
evil.  All  we  have  to  do,  or  can  do,  at  this  time  or  at  any 
other,  is  to  seek  to  mind  our  own  business,  which  I  believe  is 
in  great  mercy  yet  made  known  to  the  simple-minded,  and 
in  doing  which  they  are  often  permitted  to  know  sweet  unity 
of  spirit  with  those  who  are  in  the  one  faith,  dwell  in  the 
one  Lord,  and  submit  to  be  baptized  by  the  one  baptism. 
That  through  all  the  weakness  of  flesh  and  spirit  such  are 
still  preserved  among  us,  and  that  they  are  yet,  generally 
speaking,  those  in  authority  in  our  church,  I  believe 
we  may  gratefully   acknowledge  to  be  the  case  among 

US.      ^     ^     ^  -i^ 

To  E   S  . 

Polam  Hill,  5th  of  3rd  mo.,  1838. 

My  beloved  Triend, 

*    *     *     I  have  received  a  letter  from  dear 

 ,  which  was  deeply  interesting  to  me.    Her  account 

of  thy  services,  and  thine  of  thy  dear  husband's,  gladdened 
my  heart,  though  they  at  the  same  time  introduced  me 
into  much  tender  feeling  for  you  both.  Now  is  your  day 
to  show  yourselves  valiant  in  fight ;  and  though  it  has,  and 
no  doubt  will,  cost  you  many  sacrifices,  fear  not,  nor  be 
dismayed.  The  battle  is  not  yours,  but  His,  who  gives  to 
his  soldiers  the  wages  of  eternal  life ;  so  be  steadfast,  un- 
moveable,  always  abounding  in  the  work  of  your  Lord.  *  * 

I  think  thou  hast  my  sympathy  full  as  much  as  thy  dear 
husband,  who  will  probably  be  so  much  occupied  with  his 
business  as  to  have  little  time  to  groan  under  any  thing  but 
his  work.  But  thou  wilt  have  to  ponder  that  of  each  day, 
and  find  perhaps,  in  thy  solitary  sittings  in  thy  own  house, 
and  the  wakeful  hours  of  the  night,  that  much  of  passive 
suffering  as  well  as  active  duty  may  be  thy  present  allotment. 
One  word  of  caution  for  every  state.     Even  the  state  of 


214 


1838. 


[jF.t.  51. 


preparation  for  service^  as  well  as  service  itself,  has  its  temp- 
tations, and  it  may  be  that  one  temptation,  in  a  state  of 
suffering  and  privation,  is  to  look  too  gloomily  upon  our- 
selves, and  upon  the  church.  That  "  hoping  all  things,"  is 
an  ingredient  in  that  most  excellent  charity,  we  are  told  by 
very  high  authority ;  but  no  doubt  it  is  an  exercise  of  faith 
to  believe  that  from  seeming  evil  He  still  educes  good. 
After  all,  the  burden  of  my  song  toward  thee  is.  Be  of  good 
cheer ;  and  being  of  good  cheer,  use  thy  gifts,  and  even  be 
willing  to  stir  them  up  ;  so  shall  peace  be  in  thy  borders,  and 
prosperity  in  thy  palaces.    *    *    *  * 

For  a  few  weeks  after  her  return  from  Leeds, 
Bradford,  &c.,  H.  C.  Backhouse  remained  peacefully  at 
home.  She  subsequently  held  some  very  interesting 
meetings,  chiefly  in  the  populous  districts  of  the 
Collieries . 

To  Maria  Fox. 

Newcastle,  16th  of  3rd  mo.,  1838. 

My  BELOVED  Cousin, 

*  4f  *  *  J  }jad  a  delightful  rest  of  a 
month,  without  any  minute  or  certificate,  after  our  return 
from  Brighouse,  and  truly  did  I  enjoy  home  engagements, 
with  all  my  family  about  me.  At  the  Monthly  Meeting  in 
the  next  month  I  obtained  a  minute  for  holding  public 
meetings  in  our  neighbourhood.  They  did  not  take  me 
much  from  home  till  the  last  week,  in  which  I  have  had  one 
almost  every  evening.  I  do  not  remember  often  to  have  had 
such  close  provings  of  soul.    *    *    *  * 

Surely  nothing  is  a  more  wide- wasting  evil  than  preaching 
out  of  the  life,  and  probably  doing  so  was  the  origin  of  that 
apostacy,  the  weight  of  which  is  strongly  to  be  felt  over  our 
land,  a  darkness  to  be  felt  in  a  very  especial  manner  in 
our  Cathedral  cities,  perhaps  in  none  more  so  than  that  of 
Durham.    Oh,  may  I  be  preserved  from  this  evil  i    *    *  * 


-HT.  51.1 


1838. 


215 


CHAPTER  XIV. 

MEETINGS    WITH    THE     NOBILITY  WITH    THE    JEWS  NORFOLK  SHE 

COMPLETES  HER  ENGAGEMENT  IN  LONDON  AND  ITS  NEIGHBOUR- 
HOOD HOLDS    MEETINGS   IN    THE    EAST    RIDING   OF  YORKSHIRE 

—IN  COMPANY  WITH  HER  HUSBAND  VISITS  CUMBERLAND  AND 
NORTHUMBERLAND  -SCOTLAND  JONATHAN  BACKHOUSE*  8  ILL- 
NESS  AT  MONTROSE  THEIR  RETURN    HOME  SHE    DELIVERS  UP 

HER  CERTIFICATE. 

In  the  course  of  her  extensive  journeys  in  England 
and  Scotland,  H.  C.  Backliouse's  mind  was  often  deeply 
exercised  on  behalf  of  those  who  held  prominent  sta- 
tions in  society,  and  whose  influence  in  their  respective 
neighbourhoods,  and  in  the  country  at  large,  was  con- 
siderable. 

She  would  often  in  writing  convey  her  interest 
for  them,  and,  if  way  opened  for  it,  more  fully  relieve 
her  mind  by  a  personal  interview,  in  which  she  ex- 
pressed her  sympathy  in  the  cares  and  resi^onsibilities 
belonging  to  their  station,  accompanied  with  earnest 
desires  for  their  present  and  everlasting  welfare,  setting 
forth  at  the  same  time,  in  impressive  language,  the 
blessings  that  would  follow,  not  only  to  themselves,  but 
to  the  multitudes  over  whom  their  influence  extended, 
upon  a  faithful  obedience  to  their  divine  Master — the 
happiness  that  would  be  their  portion  on  earth — the 
crown  of  glory  which,  for  the  sake  of  their  Holy 
Redeemer,  would  be  eternally  theirs. 

At  her  request  two  meetings  were  held  successively 


216 


1838. 


[tKT.  51. 


at  the  Meeting-house  in  Westminster,  especially  for  the 
nobility,  many  of  whom  attended  them. 

At  Cambridge  was  held  a  memorable  meeting, 
which  was  attended  by  many  of  the  Collegians.  In 
this  service  she  had  the  efficient  companionship  of 
her  friend  and  fellows-labourer,  William  Forster. 

Towards  the  close  of  the  year  she  commenced,  in 
company  with  her  husband  and  her  friend  Mary  Fell, 
a  visit  to  the  families  of  Devonshire  House  Monthly 
Meeting,  and  it  was  during  this  period  that  she  was 
enabled  to  carry  into  effect  a  concern  which  had  long 
rested  on  her  mind,  to  hold  meetings  with  the  Jews,  a 
large  number  of  whom  occupy  the  district  between 
Bishopsgate  Street  and  Whitechapel.  Many  were  the 
meetings  which  she  held  ^vith  them.  They  willingly 
responded  to  the  invitation,  and  listened  attentively 
when  the  faith  of  Abraham  and  the  object  of  that  faith 
— the  glorious  truths  of  the  gospel — were  unflinchingly 
proclaimed.  In  one  of  her  letters  she  says  : — 

Last  evening  we  had  an  interesting  meeting  with  the  Jews, 
who  were  invited  to  Devonshire  House,  and  a  respectable 
assembly  we  had — preaching  to  them  out  of  Moses  and  the 
Prophets,  and  rehearsing  the  blessings  and  curses  on  their 
keeping  the  law  of  the  Lord  or  departing  from  it,  and  de- 
claring to  them  concerning  Him  of  whom  Moses  and  the 
Prophets  did  write. 

After  a  succession  of  these  meetings,  it  was  remarked 
that  many  of  the  Jews  continued  for  a  few  years  the 
practice  of  attending  Devonshire  House  meeting,  on 
First-day  afternoons. 

Whilst  paying  a  visit  to  her  mother,  she  again  held 
meetings  in  the  neighbourhood  of  Norwich.  Towards 
the  little  remnant  of  Friends  in  lier  native  city  and 


M-r.  52.] 


1839. 


217 


county  she  felt  peculiar  interest  and  the  tie  of  old 
associations  ;  visited  many  of  them  in  their  families, 
and  in  their  meetings  she  was  often  strikingly  engaged. 

After  a  long  suspension  of  her  journal  it  was  now 
re-commenced,  and  the  following  are  extracts  from  it 
during  her  visit  to  Norfolk  : — 

27th  of  1st  mo. — Attended  the  funeral  of   .  The 

feeling  of  awful  tenderness  at  the  grave  very  strong.  The 
meeting  was  a  deeply  interesting  one;  some  of  my  old 
acquaintance  and  relations  there,  who  are  never  seen  at 
meeting  but  on  such  occasions.  It  was  a  day  of  mercy  to 
my  soul,  and  I  did  not  feel  it  less  so  in  being  allowed  a 
peaceful  rest  in  the  afternoon  than  in  being  able  to  declare 
the  whole  counsel  of  God  in  the  morning. 

Slst. — Visited  families,  on  a  very  cold  day,  in  the  country  ; 
dined  at  a  farm-house,  and  deplored  the  eifects  of  drinking 
and  smoking,  to  which  I  believe  may  be  traced  the  fall,  both 
civil  and  religious,  of  many  in  this  county,  who  thought 
little  harm  of  a  social  pipe  and  glass. 

Srd  of  2nd  mo. — Meeting  with  the  Friends  of  Tivetshall  in 
the  morning ;  an  afternoon  meeting  in  the  same  Meeting- 
house, crowded  with  neighbours  ;  and  another  more  so  in  the 
evening,  at  a  Methodist  Meeting-house  at  Dickleborough :  a 
day  of  favour  to  my  own  soul,  in  which  strength  was  afforded 
to  mind  and  body. 

4th. — Visiting  families,  and  another  call  on  John 
Oldershaw.  I  had  not  felt  satisfied  with  myself,  so  called 
again  in  fear  ;  but  it  answered  well,  and  he  took  leave 
of  me  most  affectionately.  I  had  known  him  in  early  life, 
whilst  visiting  the  Kerrichs'  at  Harleston,  as  the  clergyman  of 
the  place.  He  is  now  above  eighty  years  old,  and  archdeacon; 
but  he  listened  to  a  woman's  preaching,  and  expressed  him- 
self comforted  by  it.  Meeting  at  Harleston  in  the  evening, 
satisfactory,  though  not  large. 

Came  to  the  Grove  before  they  expected  me,  and  spent  a 
most  sweet  comfortable  evening  with  my  dear  mother  alone. 
These  are  seasons  of  refreshment.  Part  of  our  employment 
this  evening  reading  Thomas  Shillitoe's  journal.     The  ex- 


218 


1839. 


[^T.  52. 


ample  of  his  faith  in  Divine  direction  has  been  very  useful  to 
me,  and  has  tended  to  reconcile  the  minds  of  some  in  regard 
to  my  movements. 

A  visit  to  the  families  of  Friends,  vsrithin  the  compass 
of  Southwark  Monthly  Meeting,  was  that  which  seemed 
next  in  order,  and  she  accordingly  returned  to  London, 
with  a  view  of  entering  upon  this  service.  She  laid 
the  matter  before  Southwark  Meeting,  and  the  pro- 
posal being  cordially  united  with,  the  visit  was  com- 
menced. But  that  heavenly  oil,  without  which  there 
can  be  no  true  anointing  for  service,  seemed  stayed  ; 
and,  humiliating  as  it  was  to  her,  both  naturally  and 
spiritually,  she  convened  some  of  the  Friends  of  that 
meeting,  and,  with  the  child-like  humility  and  simplicity 
of  •  a  true  disciple,  told  them  that  she  believed  she  had 
mistaken  the  time  for  entering  on  this  religious  engage- 
ment, and  that  her  peace  was  concerned  in  proceeding 
no  further  in  it. 

She  then  returned  into  Norfolk,  and  completed,  to 
her  own  relief  and  the  satisfaction  of  her  friends,  the 
service  in  which  she  had  been  engaged  before  returning 
to  London. 

Early  in  the  Third  month  she  resumed  her  labours  in 
London,  with  a  visit  to  the  families  of  Friends  in  the 
Monthly  Meetings  of  Gracechurch  Street  and  Peel. 
Her  faith  was  confirmed  by  the  manifest  opening  which 
there  was  for  her  gospel  labours  in  this  direction, 
and  by  the  coincidence  that  her  retirement  from  the 
field  of  labour  in  Southwark  had  made  way  for  the  per- 
formance of  a  like  service  in  that  quarter  by  another 
Friend  in  the  ministry ;  which  would  have  been  interfered 
with,  or  wholly  prevented,  had  she  proceeded  with  hers, 
as  originally  intended. 

The  following  extracts  refer  to  some  portion  of  these 
engagements  :  — 


j-rr.  52.] 


1839. 


210 


Q)th  of  Zrd  mo. — Went  to  Gracechurch  Street  Monthly 
Meeting,  where  I  confessed  my  mistake  about  Southwark, 
and  asked  their  leave  to  proceed  with  the  families  in 
Gracechurch  Street,  which  was  cordially  given,  and  I 
felt  peaceful. 

14^/*. — A  very  interesting  day  at  Uxbridge,  at  the  funeral 
of  John  Fell.  In  the  evening,  a  crowded  public  meeting  : 
believe  it  was  a  good  one. 

\7th. — A  comfortable  meeting.  Some  visits  afterwards 
with  Jacob  Post.  My  J.  B.  engaged  rather  strikingly  in  a 
family  to  whom  the  words  that  were  spoken  were  peculiarly 
applicable. 

This  Spring  she  attended  the  Yearly  Meeting  in 
DubHn,  In  describing  her  service  in  one  of  the  meetings 
there,  she  says  : — 

I  was  engaged  in  ministry  during  the  last  part  of  it,  to 
the  considerable  relief  of  my  own  mind, — the  man  Christ 
Jesus  brought  into  view,  which  in  some  communications  I 
had  thought  too  much  left  out. 

Of  the  London  Yearly  Meeting  of  this  year  she 
writes  : — 

I  could  not  but  feel  the  position  I  occupied,  and  earnestly 
did  I  desire  I  might  be  rightly  exercised  and  directed  in  it. 
I  believe  there  has  been  more  of  a  covering  of  love  over  this 
Yearly  Meeting  than  I  remember  since  I  returned  from 
America. 

9th  of  6th  mo. — At  Peel,  two  excellent  meetings,  the  last 
a  public  one.  A  day  of  much  exertion,  the  body  ready  to 
faint  under  it. 

16th. — At  Plaistow  meeting,  under  no  small  weight  of 
exercise,  but  remarkably  strengthened  to  throw  it  oflF. 

Folam,  22)1(1. — Reached  home  to  tea  with  all  our  family, 
which  I  felt  a  mercy. 

24:th. — Quietly  going  on  with  household  affairs. 


220 


1839. 


[yET.  52. 


SOth. — A  silent  meeting  in  the  morning ;  in  the  evening 
our  neighbours  were  invited,  and  a  solid  good  meeting  I 
think  it  was. 

Sunderland,  Srd  of  7th  mo.  [where  she  had  been  attending 
the  Quarterly  Meeting]. — Longed  to  go  home,  but  was 
fearful  of  doing  so  in  impatience;  so  after  a  season  concluded 
not  to  alter  our  first  prospect,  but  to  stay  over  Fifth-day. 
Made  several  calls,  and  after  supper,  at  Ashburne,  had  an  inte- 
resting time  in  encouraging  the  young  people  to  faithfulness. 

4^th. — A  very  good  searching  meeting  at  Sunderland; 
rather  a  conflicting  time  afterwards,  as  I  did  not  feel  clear  to 

go  away,  but  thought  I  must  next  day  call  upon  ,  a 

baronet  of  the  neighbourhood.  I  felt  it  not  a  little,  having 
to  go  and  see  people  of  whom  I  knew  nothing ;  however,  my 
dear  husband  went  with  me,  and  after  walking  some  time  on 
the  cliff,  during  which  my  mind  was  quieted,  we  found  them 
at  home,  and  were  received  very  politely.  I  hope  I  did  my 
duty  by  encouraging  them  to  be  faithful. 

7th. — Two  meetings  in  Newcastle,  in  which  I  spoke  at 
some  length;  in  the  evening  the  neighbours  were  invited. 
Though  very  much  exhausted  in  body  by  this  day's  work,  I 
was  easy  in  mind. 

— Proceeded  to  Morpeth  to  see  Bolam,  [a  prisoner  in 
the  county  gaol,  accused  of  murder.] 

9th. — Again  visited  the  gaol,  and  the  governor  collected 
the  prisoners  for  us  in  the  chapel :  much  was  said  to  them, 
and  they  appeared  to  feel  it. 

Wth. — At  home.  The  meeting  in  the  morning  one  in 
which  I  should  have  liked  to  keep  silence ;  but  I  believe 
faith  did  better  for  me  than  my  wisdom. 

21*^. — In  the  afternoon,  a  public  meeting  in  the  school- 
room at  Dalton  ;  altogether  a  peaceful  day. 

— The  wedding  of  my  niece  Lucy  B.  Backhouse  ;*  a 
beautiful  sample  of  order  externally,  and  much  internal 
comfort. 

30^/?. — A  memorable  time  after  breakfast.  I  was  very  low, 
and  got  some  relief  in  prayer  for  us  and  dear  Edmund 
[leaving  home  for  school] . 

of  Sth  mo. — Paid  a  religious  visit  to   ,  [a  cele- 

*  To  Johu  Mounsey. 


Mr.  52.] 


1839. 


221 


brated  boxer,]  in  the  moruiug,  and  in  the  evening  went  to 
Wakefield,  and  had  a  good  meeting  with  tlie  railroad  men. 
Several  other  satisfactory  public  meetings  in  this  neigh- 
bourhood. 

IGih. — Went  to  the  meeting  at  Leeds,  where  I  was  heartily 
welcomed  by  Friends,  and  had  a  sweet  meeting  with  them  : 
my  soul  refreshed. 

4th  of  9ih  mo.—*  *  *  *  My  unusual  path  of  faith 
most  deeply  trying  to  myself  and  often  to  my  friends ;  but 
sometimes  am  I  given  to  feel  that  I  have  a  Counsellor  better 
than  the  best  of  men,  and  Him  I  must  follow. 

— Off  at  seven  o'clock  for  Osmotherly.  The  neighbours 
invited  to  the  afternoon  meeting,  which  proved  a  good  one  ; 
and  then,  with  a  little  of  that  living  water  which  refreshes 
soul  and  body,  drove  on,  as  soon  as  we  could,  to  our  meeting 
at  Smeaton,  in  a  barn.  It  was  really  a  favoured  one,  and  we 
returned  home,  I  trust,  with  renewed  faith,  and  thankful  for 
the  mercies  of  the  day. 

Then  followed  several  visits  to  country  places,  where 
the  people  were  many  of  them  poor  and  neglected  ; 
often  the  most  favoured  meetings  were  amongst  this 
class,  and  in  one  or  two  places,  where  the  people  had  a 
character  for  ignorance  and  vice,  the  door  seemed  re- 
markably open. 

In  these  journeys  H.  C.  Backhouse  was  generally 
accompanied  by  one  of  her  daughters,  and,  besides  the 
willing  assistance  which  was  rendered  by  Friends  of  the 
parts  she  visited,  in  her  faithful  servant  John  Hall  she 
often  found  an  efficient  helper.* 

*  It  was  rarel}'  indeed  that  .Jolm  Hall  was  disposed  to  complaiu  ;  he 
had  so  much  respect  for  his  mistress,  and  for  the  cause  in  which  she  was 
engaged,  that  his  part  of  the  work — which  often  involved  no  small 
exertion  both  to  himself  and  his  horses— was  usually  rendered  with 
cheerful  alacrity.  On  one  occasion,  when,  after  moi-e  than  usual  toil, 
he  had  been  a  little  inclined  to  murmur,  he  was,  as  he  afterwards 
remarked,  so  "  refreshed "  by  the  meeting  which  followed,  that  he  « 
thought  he  could  not  again  be  "  put  out  "  by  anything  belonging  to  the 
work,  which  he  felt  "was  indeed  a  good  one." 


222  1839.  [^T.  52. 

22nd. — At  meeting  with  our  friends  in  our  own  room  at 
the  inn  at  Redcar,  in  the  morning  ;  a  public  one  at  Coatham 
in  the  afternoon,  and  at  Redcar,  in  the  Methodist  Meeting- 
house, in  the  evening.    A  day  of  much  favour. 

29th. — At  Whitby  meeting  in  the  morning  ;  a  pubHc 
meeting  at  Sleights  in  the  afternoon,  and  one  at  Egton  in 
the  evening. 

7th  of  lOth  mo.—*  *  *  *  I  do  not  think  I  set  a 
sufficient  watch  on  the  door  of  my  lips. 

Sth.  spoke  to  me  very  seriously  about  our  much 

going  out.    Felt  it  a  good  deal. 

9th. — Yet  thought  it  right  to  persevere,  and  went  to  Long 
Newton.    A  good  meeting. 

To  

12th  of  10th  mo.,  18.39. 

My  dear  Triend, 

It  was  no  small  comfort  to  me  to  receive  thy 
letter  of  the  Seventh  month  30th ;  the  time  since  I  heard 
from  thee  before  had  been  so  long,  and  I  had  written  to 
thee  twice  in  it,  that  I  almost  concluded  thou  must  have 
become  quite  alienated  from  us.  I  was  glad  indeed  to  find 
by  thy  letter  it  was  not  so,  and  that  thou  yet  retained  the 
affection  for  us  that  we  so  much  valued  when  we  were 
together.  From  what  we  had  to  experience  when  among  you, 
I  think  I  am  in  some  degree  prepared  to  sympathize  with  you 
in  tlie  false  views  some  may  take  of  you ;  but  as  the  opinion 
of  man  makes  no  real  alteration  in  our  state,  I  have  always 
believed  it  best  no  further  to  regard  it  than  as  one  of  the 
means  which  are  often  made  use  of  to  lead  into  close  self- 
examination,  in  which  we  may  crave  for  that  spirit  of  meek- 
ness and  humility  through  which  we  may  be  prepared  to 
receive  every  lesson  that  the  Spirit  of  Truth  may  teach  us. 
Thus  evil  report,  rightly  made  use  of,  has  a  strong  influence 
in  bringing  us  before  the  Throne  of  Grace,  that  mercy-seat 
near  which  we  are  enlightened  in  the  knowledge  of  the  most 
hidden  recesses  of  the  heart,  and,  being  contrited  at  the 
sight  of  manifold  infirmities,  are  brought  to  taste  of  the 


JET.  52.] 


1839. 


223 


forgiveness  and  purification  that  belong  to  the  extension  of 
that  mercy  alone.  So  have  many  servants  of  the  Lord  Jesus, 
in  every  age  of  the  world,  been  brightened  in  the  furnace  of 
affliction,  and  evil  report  has  been  so  changed  into  good 
report,  that  the  supposed  murderer  has  been  thought  a  God* 
as  well  as  he  that  was  thought  a  God  stonedf.  But  possibly 
the  real  state  of  the  heart  is  as  much  proved  by  good  report ; 
the  mortal  who  can  so  receive  it  as  to  give  all  the  glory  to 
Him  to  whom  alone  it  belongs,  must  indeed  be  filled  with  the 
Spirit,  and  abide  in  the  spirit  of  Him  who  was  meek  and 
lowly  of  heart ;  but  when  good  report  is  not  thus  received,  a 
fall  is  the  sure  consequence  ;  and  I  cannot  but  fear  that  this 
has  been  the  real  cause  of  the  stumbling  of  some  whom  in 
days  past  we  have  thought  very  well  of, — I  believe  deservedly. 
So  it  often  appears  to  me  as  if  everything  within  and  without 
cries  out  that  we  stand  in  jeopardy  every  hour  ;  but  then  we 
may  remember  that  help  is  laid  on  One  who  is  mighty  to  save 
and  to  deliver,  &c. ;  that  He  is  touched  with  a  feeling  of  our 
infirmities,  and  that  through  Him  the  victory  may  be  obtained; 
so  that,  though  we  may  fear  always,  we  never  need  despair, 
but  may  commit  ourselves,  under  the  most  trying  circum- 
stances of  life,  to  Him  who  judges  righteously,  and  who  we 
know  will  render  unto  every  man  according  to  his  deeds.  I 
rather  long  to  know  the  result  of  your  last  Yearly  Meeting, 
and  whether  you  have  been  comforted  in  any  of  its  decisions, 
or  felt  its  spirit  helpful  in  pouring  a  little  balm  into  your 
tried  souls, 

I  can  hardly  suppose  any  position  more  trying  than  one  to 
which  I  have  at  times  been  exposed,  when  I  have  known  that 
individuals  have  been  very  jealous  of,  if  not  disapproving,  my 
ministry ;  but  it  seems  to  me  all  we  have  to  do  in  such 
circumstances  is  to  keep  very  close  to  the  gift,  and  to  be  as 
faithful  to  it  as  we  possibly  can,  both  in  doing  and  in  suff'ering, 
leaving  the  result  in  the  hands  of  Him  from  whom  we  believe 
it  has  been  received.  I  did  not  like  to  hear  of  thy  having 
been  so  long  silent  in  the  ministry.  Hast  thou  not  closed 
thy  own  mouth  at  times,  by  meditating  on  the  things  of  man, 
rather  than  keeping  thy  whole  attention  exclusively  fixed  on 


Acts  xxviii.  4-6. 


t  Acts  xiv.  ]1-10. 


224 


1839. 


[^:t.  52. 


the  things  of  God  ?  Now,  if  we  do  in  the  secret  of  our 
hearts  halt  a  little,  those  who  are  on  the  watch  for  our  halting 
will  quickly  discover  it,  and,  truth  being  partly  on  their  side, 
they  will  be  sure  to  make  the  most  of  it ;  and  when  we  are 
found  fault  with  by  those  who  have  a  little  truth  on  their 
side,  though  they  may  give  expression  to  a  great  deal  more 
than  there  really  is,  we  feel  much  more  acutely,  and  are  much 
more  apt  to  resent  it  and  be  soured  by  it,  than  when  there  is 
no  truth  at  all  in  their  feeling  towards  us.  So  it  is  we  must 
look  straight  forward,  and  then  I  believe  we  shall  be  helped 
along;  for  when  a  man's  ways  please  the  Lord,  he  maketh 
even  his  enemies  to  be  at  peace  with  him,  (i.  e.  in  His  own 
time) .  Thou  seest  I  have  spoken  very  plainly,  indeed  have 
told  all  my  mind  as  I  have  gone  along. 

Thy  letter  mentions  thy  husband's  being  out  on  a  journey 
into  the  western  parts  of  your  country.  I  could  venture  to 
hope  it  was  not  on  a  voyage  of  discovery  to  see  where  you 
might  move  from  your  present  position.  I  do  think  you  had 
need  be  especially  guarded  under  your  present  circumstances 
not  to  move  but  under  the  most  clear  pointings  of  the 
Divine  finger ;  indeed  I  can  hardly  suppose  it  to  be  right 
for  you  to  do  so,  until  by  patience  and  forbearance,  and  the 
ordering  of  Him  in  whose  hands  are  the  hearts  of  all  the 
children  of  men,  you  ai'e  on  those  comfortable  terms  with  the 
Friends  where  you  now  live  that  you  once  were.  How  I 
should  rejoice  to  hear  this  was  the  case,  and  I  cannot  despair 
of  it  if  you  patiently  and  meekly  bear  all  the  torments  of  that 
discipline  that  Wisdom  is  said  in  the  Apocrypha  to  give  her 
children. — Ecclesiasticus  iv.  16,  18.  Well,  thou  mayst  say 
this  is  hard  to  bear,  especially  when  it  comes  through  those 
who,  we  conjecture,  know  little  of  the  matter;  but  the 
scourge  in  the  hand  of  the  master  knows  nothing  of  injury, 
real  or  supposed,  for  which  it  is  made  the  instrument  of 
inflicting  suffering.  And  so  if  we  could  view  our  fellow- 
moi'tals  when  made  instruments  of  giving  us  suffering,  I 
believe  it  would  tend  greatly  to  the  advancement  of  that  dis- 
pensation which  has  for  its  object  glory  to  God  in  the  highest, 
peace  on  earth,  and  good- will  to  men. 

H.  C.  Backhouse. 


;et.  52.] 


1839. 


225 


Seaton,  —Meeting  in  my  brother  Edward's  parlour 

in  the  morning  ;  at  Hartlepool  in  the  afternoon,  and  at 
Seaton  in  the  evening,  in  the  Methodist  Meeting-house.  A 
day  of  no  small  favour,  particularly  the  last  meeting. 

19^^.— Monthly  Meeting.  Went  quietly  to  it,  with  earnest 
desires  that  I  might  be  rightly  directed ;  which  prayer,  now 
in  returning  from  it,  has  I  believe  been  heard.  Much  in- 
teresting preaching;  afterwards  I  requested  Friends  to  stop, 
and  obtained  another  minute,  [for  holding  meetings  in  her 
own  neighbourhood,]  which  was  very  cordially  granted ;  and 
my  own  mind  is  very  peaceful.  Thanks  to  Him  who  does 
not  forsake  those  who  trust  in  Him,  though  He  often  permits 
their  faith  to  be  closely  tried. 

24-th. — A  sweet  afternoon  with  my  dear  mother,  instead  of 
going  to  the  afternoon  meeting,  and  then  she  went  with  me 
to  Piercebridge,  where  we  had  an  excellent  meeting.  The 
consolations  of  the  gospel  abounded  afterwards. 

2nd  of  12th  mo. — My  dear  mother  left  us.  Had  an  in- 
teresting leave-taking  at  Southend.  Something  remarkably 
sweet  and  complete  in  this  visit, 

7th.— A  meeting  at  Heighington  in  the  evening,  crowded, 
and  many  words  were  not  wanting  ;  but  my  mind  was  not 
relieved,  perhaps  owing  to  the  fear  of  appearing  in  suppli- 
cation after  so  many  words ;  so  perhaps  I  lost  patience,  and, 
with  it,  bread. 

To  

D;ir]iiigtoii,  5th  of  12th  mo.,  1839. 

My  Dear  Priexd, 

There  was  one  subject  thou  touched  upon  in 
thy  kind  note,  about  which  I  have  since  thought  a  good  deal. 
"  I  hope,"'  thou  sayest,  "  zeal  will  not  go  before  knowledge 
in  the  Teetotal  cause — I  think  I  see  harm  to  the  cause  of 
Christianity  in  it."  I  believe  unsanctified  zeal,  even  in  the 
cause  of  Christianity  itself,  defeats  its  own  object;  but  a 
cause  being  pursued  in  a  wrong  manner,  is  no  argument  at 
all  against  the  cause  itself;  and  I  am' willing  to  confess  that 
the  more  I  know  of  the  workings  of  total  abstinence  from  all 
fermented  liquors,  the  more  I  value  the  principle,  and  see 


22G 


1839. 


[.ET.  52. 


the  great  advantages  that  must  flow  from  it — and  on  the 
other  hand,  I  can  see  no  disadvantages  from  pursuing  it.  If 
I  like  to  drink  nothing  but  water,  milk,  tea,  and  coffee, 
and  find  I  am  no  worse,  but  rather  the  better ;  I  do  not 
see  on  what  pi-inciple  I  can  injure  any  one,  and  if  I  sit  at 
the  head  of  my  table  doing  so,  there  is  a  silent  preaching 
against  intemperance,  which  may  not  well  please  my  neigh- 
bour ;  but  which  surely  need  not  prohibit  him  from  taking 
as  much  as  his  conscience  approves  for  the  benefit  of 
health ;  and  I  suppose  for  indulgence  in  drinking  thou 
wouldst  not  plead.  I  cannot  but  see  that  had  all  the  masters 
and  mistresses  of  families,  who  would  not  think  moderate 
drinking  an  evil,  been  teetotallers,  it  would  have  made  a 
wonderful  difference  in  some  families  with  whom  we  have  been 
acquainted  ;  and  many  a  bitter  cup  would  have  been  spared. 
Perhaps  there  could  hardly  be  found  a  prisoner,  who  may  not 
trace  to  drinking  the  beginning  or  consummation  of  his 
vicious  courses.  How  the  cause  of  Christianity  can  possibly 
suffer  from  people  not  taking  fermented  liquors,  I  cannot 
conceive ;  but  that  it  suffers  prodigiously  under  their  doing 
so,  I  am  absolutely  certain. 

13th. — At  Thirsk.  One  of  those  nights  when  the  blast  of 
the  terrible  one  was  truly  felt — a  night  of  wrestling,  so  many 
fears  of  being  deluded,  and  so  longing  to  get  home.  Isabel 
Casson  very  kind  to  me.  My  conflict  resulted  in  the  appoint- 
ment of  a  meeting  in  a  village  this  afternoon.  Rested  in 
the  morning,  and  had  a  remarkable  meeting  in  the  evening 
in  the  coach-house  of  a  widow  lady.  The  day  ended  in  great 
peace,  and  I  had  a  good  night's  rest. 

15th. — At  Thirsk  this  morning,  full  of  peace,  and  a  good 
meeting  with  Friends. 

16th. — Returned  home, — a  treat  to  get  there. 

At  this  time  J.  and  H.  C.  Backhouse  obtained  the 
concurrence  of  their  Monthly  Meeting  for  a  religious 
visit  in  Scotland,  to  which  Cumberland  and  Northum- 
berland were  subsequently  added. 


.KT.  52.] 


1839. 


227 


17 th. — Rose  peaceful  after  a  very  good  night's  rest.  At 
meeting,  Scotland  came  fresh  before  me.  I  allowed  the 
meeting  to  break  up,  but  afterwards  convened  Friends,  and 
with  my  dear  husband,  was  sweetly  liberated.  A  day  of 
much  peace.    Went  into  the  men's  meeting. 

ISth. — Rather  ruffled  by  too  much  personal  exertion  on 
things  that  do  not  signify. 

19//<. — A  peaceful  comfortable  meeting. 

To  Mary  James  Leckey. 

Polam  Hill,  14th  of  12th  mo.,  1839. 

My  beloved  Friend, 

*  *  *  *  I  have  always  desired  thy  faith- 
fulness in  this  as  Avell  as  every  other  matter,  and  do  desire 
that  the  discourager  may  never  be  suflFered  to  hinder  the  good 
work,  which  he  is  apt  to  succeed  in  doing,  I  believe,  in  many 
instances,  making  thereby  room  for  unauthorized  offerings. 
I  do  hope  your  troubles,*  which  possibly  have  originated  in 
self-righteousness,  have  abated,  though  many  under  them  have 
suffered  great  loss.  I  never  could  be  sorry,  for  the  general 
good  of  the  Church,  that  this  spirit  has  so  rapidly  led  to  ex- 
tremes, and  thereby  shown  itself  so  distinctly.  Such 
proceedings  in  the  will  and  wisdom  of  man,  under  the  garb 
of  self-denial  and  great  spirituality,  are  only  a  stratagem  of  the 
enemy  to  prevent  the  eye  from  being  kept  single  to  Him  who 
guides  his  servants  into  all  truth  by  that  way  which  He  trod, 
who  was  himself  the  friend  of  publicans  and  sinners,  and 
through  whose  cross — and  not  our  own — we  are  redeemed 
from  all  iniquity ;  the  world  is  crucified  to  us  and  M  e  unto 
the  world.  Then,  as  to  the  duty  of  cross-bearing  and  Chris- 
tian self-denial.  I  have  never  approved  the  expression  of 
'•'taking  up  the  cross"  when  applied  exclusively  to  external 
acts.  I  do  believe  that  the  taking  up  of  the  cross,  under  the 
guidance  of  the  Spirit,  does  frequently  lead  to  those  external 

*  Allusion  is  here  made  to  the  trials,  to  which,  on  a  comparatively 
small  scale,  and  for  a  short  time,  Friends,  especially  in  the  south  of 
Ireland,  were  subjected,  by  a  ranting  spirit  in  some  who  made  a  high 
profession  of  spirituality. 

Q2 


228 


1839. 


[mt.  53. 


acts  which  mark  before  men  our  desire  to  be  the  disciples  of 
Christ ;  but  that  is  a  very  different  thing  from  calling  these 
acts  the  cross,  and  thus  confounding  cause  and  effect.  I 
am  not  fond  of  dwelling  on  nice  distinctions,  but  I  have  seen 
so  much  error  arise  (apparently)  from  the  want  of  keeping  to 
the  form  of  sound  words,  or  Scripture  terms,  that  I  think  it 
peculiarly  desirable  for  those  engaged  in  the  ministry  to  be  very 
careful  to  avoid  adopting  any  phraseology  that  can  be  doubtful, 
when  every  clear  meaning  may  be  conveyed  in  clear  terms. 
The  state  of  society  everywhere  demands  that  we  should  be 
careful  in  these  respects.  I  feel  much  interested  for  the 
Friends  in  Ireland,  who,  from  our  first  acquaintance,  have 
shown  us  so  much  kindness.  That  thou  mournest  over  the  low 
state  of  things  I  do  not  wonder ;  but  if  thou  dost  thy  best, 
thou  must  not  be  careful  for  anything,  in  the  consoling  belief 
that  He  who  has  given  himself  for  his  Church  loves  her  more 
than  we  can  possibly  do,  and  cares  for  her  to  an  extent  that 
we  cannot  possibly  comprehend.    *    *    *  * 

In  the  year  1840,  laborious  engagements  and  import- 
ant events  rapidly  succeeded  each  other.  During  the 
spring  J,  and  H.  C.  Backhouse  were  engaged  in  visiting 
the  meetings  of  Friends,  and  holding  numerous  meet- 
ings of  a  more  public  character  in  Cumberland  and 
Northumberland.  They  found  a  very  open  door  in  that 
district,  and  diligently  did  they  labour  in  the  work  to 
which  they  were  called,  devoting  to  it  unsparingly  their 
time  and  their  substance. 

The  following  letters  and  extracts  relate  to  this 
period  : — 

Cockermouth,  31st  of  12th  mo.,  1839. 

My  dearest  Mother, 

*  *  *  *  I  have  shed  many  tears  this 
week  from  earnest  longings  to  be  with  my  children,  and  to 
spend  this  week  with  them ;  but  it  has  always  seemed  as  if  my 
days  could  not  be  marked  by  spending  them  as  I  would 
naturally  choose.    Greatly  in  the  cross  1  have  turned  out, 


£.T.  52.] 


18  iO. 


229 


and  many  deep  plunges  I  have  had ;  but  I  could  not  doubt  it 
was  right  my  being  at  the  Quarterly  Meeting  at  Wigton,  and 
I  have  always  seemed  in  my  place  in  every  meeting  I  have 
had ;  but  what  has  cost  me  the  most  thoughtfulness  and 
conflict,  has  been  the  belief  that  it  might  be  right  to  attend 
Kendal  Quarterly  Meeting,  which  I  expect  to  venture  upon 
to-morrow. 

I  think  thou  wilt  feel  for  me  in  it  in  many  ways,  for  it 
reuews  very  painful  remembrances.*  Thou  wilt  pity  me  in 
the  sacrifice  of  so  much  home  comfort,  and  crave  my  preser- 
vation. Whether  we  go  forward  into  Scotland,  after  the 
Quarterly  Meeting  at  Newcastle,  we  have  not  yet  determined. 
The  pain  of  thus  leaving  my  family  has,  indeed,  been  severe ; 
but  I  trust  we  may  be  cared  for.   *    *    *  * 

To  HER  ChILDKEN. 

Morpeth,  1st  of  1st  mo.,  1840. 

I  have  had  a  time  of  much  sufiering  and  close 
trial  of  faith,  which  has  ended  in  going  on  with  the  work  in 
these  parts.    After  you  left  us,  my  heart  was  sad  indeed,  but 

I  managed  to  get  through  dinner  at  the   s',  and, 

after  an  hour's  rest — if  rest  it  might  be  called — in  all  the  pain 
of  separation  from  you,  we  rode  to  Morpeth,  where  my  heart 
continued  sad,  and  so  went  to  meeting.  As  soon  as  it  was 
over,  a  pleasing-looking  young  woman  called  and  said,  that 
though  she  feared  it  was  an  intrusion,  she  could  not  be 
satisfied  without  coming  to  speak  to  us.  She  had  felt  so 
comforted  by  the  meeting, — it  had  been  a  great  relief  to  her 
mind ;  she  had  loved  our  people  ever  since  she  was  a  child, 
and  though  she  had  never  before  seen  Friends  but  in  the 
shops  and  streets,  nor  ever  attended  one  of  their  meetings, 
yet  she  had  been  impressed  with  the  idea  that  that  people 
was  her  people.  She  believed  that  such  a  language  as  this 
might  be  addressed  to  me  :  "  If  thou  wilt  care  for  my  flock,  I 

*  It  was  wliile  engaged  in  attending  tlie  Quarterly  Meeting  at  this 
place,  in  1836,  that  she  was  summoned  to  attend  the  death-bed  of  her 
son  H.  G.  Backhouse.    (See  p.  195.) 


230 


1840. 


[.«T.  53. 


will  cai'e  for  thy  children."  I  have  at  last  given  you  up, 
and  trust  that  the  Shepherd  of  Israel  may  himself  be  near 
to  do  you  good. 

Newbiggin,  13tli  of  1st  mo.,  1840. 

My  dearly-beloved  Children, 

You  have  been  with  me  night  and  day,  and 
never,  since  the  hour  I  first  laid  you  to  my  bosom,  do  I  think 
my  whole  soul  has  felt  so  knit  to  you ;  then  I  received  an 
infant  babe,  but  now  it  seems  your  souls  as  well  as  bodies  are 
my  especial  care,  with  the  fondest  interest  of  maternal  love, 
in  the  double  sense  of  natural  and  spiritual  mother.  How  I 
do  crave  you  may  be  nourished  by  the  sincere  milk  of  the 
word,  which  I  may  pray  for,  but  cannot  give  ! 

Irvington,  18th  of  2nd  mo.,  1840. 

My  dearest  Mother, 

*  *  *  *  We  have  met  with  many  seriously- 
minded  people,  and  the  willingness  to  come  to  the  meetings 
which  we  have  appointed  in  this  neighbourhood  has  been 
great ;  the  houses  have  been  crowded,  and  I  believe  it 
may  be  truly  said  the  meetings  have  been  favoured  ones. 
For  some  time  past  we  have  had  one  eveiy  evening,  and,  as 
thou  mayst  suppose,  I  have  often  been,  and  am  almost  always, 
very  weary  ;  but  I  get  just  round  enough  again,  by  sleep  and 
food,  to  go  on ;  and  when  we  are  to  stop,  and  where,  I  know 
not.  My  dear  husband  does  not  goto  all  the  meetings,  which 
I  am  glad  of,  as  I  am  sure  the  exertion  would  be  too  much 
for  him ;  but  if  he  is  content  to  take  the  business  moderately, 
I  see  it  rather  does  him  good  than  otherwise.    *    *    *  * 

This  engagement  was  resumed  after  the  Yearly  Meet- 
ing. Many  pubhc  meetings  were  held  in  Northumber- 
land, and  then,  with  their  whole  family,  J.  and  H.  C. 
Backhouse  crossed  the  border.  Meetings  were  held  at 
Coldstream,  Jedburgh,  Peebles,  Glasgow,  Stirling,  Perth, 
and  other  places.    After  one  at  Montrose,  in  which 


.KT.  53.] 


1840. 


231 


Jonathan  Backhouse  had  been  largely  engaged  in  niin- 
istiy,  he  was  seized  with  a  severe  attack  of  paralysis, 
and  for  some  days  his  life  appeared  in  danger ;  he  was, 
however,  permitted  to  recover  a  considerable  degree  of 
health,  although  the  full  use  of  his  limbs  never  returned. 
His  wife  records  of  this  period  that  "a  sense  of  heavenly 
peace  rested  upon  their  little  party  in  the  sick  chamber." 

Before  quitting  Montrose,  H.  C.  Backhouse  felt  bound 
to  the  performance  of  some  further  service  in  that  part 
of  Scotland.  Whilst  absent  on  some  of  these  en- 
gagements, she  wrote  as  follows : — 

To  Jonathan  Backhousk. 

Cupar,  Fife,  14th  of  10th  mo.,  1840. 

My  dearkst, 

Thy  sweet  letter,  with  dear  Aun^s  addition,  so 
like  yourselves,  I  have  received,  together  with  the  enclosures. 
Everything  does  truly  call  us  home,  and  I  trust  a  kind  and 
gentle  Master  will  allow  us  shortly  to  live  there.  The  meeting 
I  had  last  night  was  so  remarkably  owned,  after  twenty-four 
hours  of  as  much  mental  suffering  as  I  have  often  passed 
through,  that  I  cannot  distrust  the  feelings  that  induced  me, 
greatly  in  the  cross,  to  leave  you.  I  have  had  a  good  re- 
freshing night's  rest,  and  the  aspiration  of  my  heart  in  the 
morning  that  way  might  be  made,  if  possible,  towards  home, 
I  trust  will  be  answered.  Every  natural  thing  does  indeed 
seem  to  call  for  it,  and  I  trust  no  impediment  may  arise  to 
our  at  least  being  at  Wooler  on  First-day,  leaving  Edinburgh 
on  Sixth-day. 

The  journey  home  was  safely  accomplished,  and 
with  grateful  hearts  the  little  party  assembled  once 
more  in  their  own  dwelling,  though  under  a  chastened 
feeling  caused  by  the  feebleness  and  impaired  power 
of  its  beloved  and  honoured  head. 


282 


1840. 


[iET.  53. 


On  the  3rd  of  Eleventh  month,  H.  C.  Backhouse 
delivered  up  her  certificate  in  something  like  these 
words  : — 

It  was  in  weakness^  in  fear,  and  in  much  trembling,  that 
I  asked  for  this  certificate,  and  I  can  truly  say  that  since  that 
time  (now  nearly  twelve  months'  ago),  this  has  been  my  almost 
constant  state.  Never,  I  think,  in  any  previous  year  of  my 
life,  have  I  passed  through  so  much  suffering,  and  never  has 
all  natural  strength  been  more  prostrated  at  the  foot  of  the 
cross ;  but  I  may  acknowledge  there  have  also  been  seasons 
of  abounding  consolation,  when  there  has  been  a  foretaste  of 
that  glory  which  the  redeemed  partake  of. 

About  one  hundred  public  meetings  were  held  in  Cum- 
berland, and  a  great  many  in  Scotland.  In  almost  all  of 
them  I  had  the  company  of  my  beloved  husband,  until  we 
came  to  Montrose,  where,  after  a  large  and  very  satisfactory 
meeting,  than  in  which  I  think  I  never  heard  him  more 
excellent,  he  was  seized  with  a  stroke  which  nearly  proved 
fatal.  Such  a  sense  of  peace  was  given,  even  at  the  time, 
as  marked  the  presence  of  my  God,  and  it  was  continued 
during  the  whole  of  this  illness  at  Montrose.  The  Lord  was 
indeed  very  near  to  my  beloved  husband,  making  all  his  bed 
in  his  sickness,  and  supporting  by  his  strength  those  nearest 
and  dearest  to  him.  When  he  Ijccame  better,  I  left  him  for 
a  night  or  two  at  a  time,  to  attend  some  meetings  in  the 
neighbourhood,  but  it  was  always  very  painful  to  me,  and 
sometimes  the  conflict  between  nature  and  grace  was  more 
than  I  knew  how  to  bear. 

Some  of  these  meetings  were  remarkably  owned,  and  I 
believe,  if  patience  had  had  a  more  perfect  work,  our  return 
might  have  been  delayed  a  few  days  longer,  and  a  few  more 
meetings  been  held  on  the  coast ;  but  the  pressure  of  cir- 
cumstances seemed  to  call  us  home,  and,  after  having  mused 
much  upon  the  subject,  and  whether  I  should  give  up  my 
certificate,  I  thought  of  our  Saviour  at  the  grave  of  Lazarus, 
and  believed  that  He  who  wept  over  it  would  take  compassion 
on  my  infirmities. 

Scotland  is  a  very  interesting  country ;  they  are  a  very 
considering  people,  and  at  this  time  there  is  much  questioning 


iET.  53.] 


1840. 


233 


iu  regard  to  a  hireling  ministry.  Truly  tlie  fields  are  ripe 
unto  harvest.  I  have  sometimes  thought  whether  there  was 
not  too  much  amongst  us^  as  individuals  and  as  a  Society,  of 
saying,  "  There  are  four  months  and  then  cometh  harvest.'' 
Oh !  that  the  rising  generation  may  be  devoted  to  the 
service  of  their  Lord,  and  with  more  faith  and  more 
patience,  preach  the  unsearchable  riches  of  Christ. 


234 


1841. 


[^T.  54. 


CHAPTER  XV. 

DKATH  OF  HER  MOTHER  LETTERS  SERVICES  IN  THE  EAST  RIDING  OF 

YORKSHIRE  HER  HUSBAND's  DEATH  HIS  CHARACTER. 

Before  the  close  of  the  year,  H.  C.  Backhouse  was 
again  engaged  in  rehgious  service  in  Scotland,  accom- 
panied by  her  beloved  friend  E.  P.  Kirkbride. 

In  the  Second  Month,  1841,  she  was  summoned  to 
attend  the  dying  bed  of  her  beloved  mother,  Jane 
Gurney. 

Of  the  latter  it  may  truly  be  said,  notwithstanding  the 
many  blessings  with  which  she  was  surrounded,  that  such 
was  her  sensitive  nature  that  the  path  of  her  pilgrimage 
was  often  weary,  and  she  had  drunk  deep  of  the  cup  of 
sorrow.  The  death  of  her  husband,  and  seven  out  of 
her  nine  children,  most  of  them  in  mature  life — left  her 
bereaved  and  heart-stricken  ;  yet  was  it  evident  that 
each  successive  trial  accomplished  the  purpose  for  which 
it  was  sent,  and  was  received  by  her  with  growing- 
submission  to  the  Hand  that  dispensed  it.  Her  house 
was  the  sheltered  home  of  her  daughter's  children,  not 
only  during  the  long  journey  of  their  parents  in 
America,  but  also  in  their  frequent  absence  on  other 
religious  errands.  Neither  was  she  forgetful  of  the 
apostolic  injunction  to  entertain  strangers,  and  many 
were  the  gospel  messengers  who  shared  her  hospitality 
and  Christian  kindness.  Her  love  for  her  friends,  and 
her  practical  interest  in  their  welfare,  became  increasingly 
conspicuous  in  her  declining  years.    She  reached  the 


.'KT.  54.] 


1841. 


235 


advanced  age  of  eighty-two,  with  but  httle  failure  of 
either  bodily  or  mental  power.    Her  evening  was  calm 
and  peaceful,  and  her  sun  set  in  brightness. 
Of  this  event  H,  C.  Backhouse  writes  thus  : — 

To  Jonathan  Backhouse. 

Grove,  22ud  of  2ud  mo.,  1841. 

It  has  been  a  great  mercy  to  us  that  we  were 
strengthened  to  leave  you  at  the  time  we  did^  as  it  enabled  us 
to  arrive  just  at  the  seasonable  hour.  When  my  dearest  mother 
had  aroused  from  the  unconscious  state  she  had  been  in  most 
of  the  night,  and  evidently  received  no  small  consolation 
from  the  knowledge  that  dear  Jane  and  myself  were  beside 
her,  she  pressed  my  lips  earnestly,  and  in  an  accent  I 
shall  never  forget,  she  said  "  Dear  Hannah  !"  She  appeared 
to  be  in  great  suffering.  I  told  her  I  believed  it  was  the 
forerunner  of  unutterable  joy,  on  which  she  remarked  that 
"  all  was  clear  before  her."  I  said  the  Lord  was  with  her,  and 
I  believed  the  language  to  her  was,  "  This  day  shalt  thou  be 
with  me  in  Paradise.^'  We  thought  she  answered,  "It  is  all  of 
mercy;"  at  least  the  word  "mercy"  was  several  times  repeated, 
and  then  "  forgiveness on  which  I  said,  "■  The  people  that 
dwell  therein  are  forgiven  their  iniquity."  Shortly  afterward 
she  exclaimed,  "  Now  open  the  pearl  gates,'^  two  or  three  times 
repeating  it.  She  then  appeared  to  be  in  considerable  suffering 
for  several  hours,  and  afterwards  fell  into  a  sleep  of  perfect 
tranquillity,  and,  drawing  her  breath  shorter  and  shorter, 
made  no  doubt,  a  glorious  entrance  into  one  of  those  mansions 
her  Lord  had  prepared  for  her.  It  was  a  most  triumphant 
escape  from  the  sufterings  of  time  into  the  joys  of  eternity. 
"  Beautiful  for  situation,  the  joy  of  the  whole  earth,  is  Mount 
Zion,  the  city  of  the  living  God."  A  feeling  of  heavenly 
peace  clothed  our  spirits  as  we  stood  around  her  bed,  which 
I  trust  was  not  interrupted  by  a  few  words  from  myself; 
and  afterwards  dear  J.  J.  Gurney,  in  supplication,  brought 
all  the  members  of  our  family,  both  those  that  are  gone 
and  those  that  remain,  before  the  throne  of  grace  in  a  very 
sweet  manner. 


236 


1841. 


[mt.  54. 


It  would  be  impossible  for  such  a  scene  to  abound  with 
more  consolations.  "  The  path  of  the  just  is  as  the  shining 
light,  that  shineth  more  and  more  unto  the  perfect  day." 

To  Elizabeth  Dudley. 

My  BELOVED  Triend, 

I  do  feel  something  like  shame  at  thy  truly 
welcome  and  acceptable  letter  having  remained  so  long  un- 
answered. I  could  make  a  number  of  apologies  for  it ;  but 
I  had  rather  simply  say  I  am  sorry  it  has  not  been  done, 
lest  thou  might  possibly  have  thought  we  had  not  truly 
valued  thy  kindness  and  attention.  We  can  sincerely  respond 
to  the  language,  "  Ye  are  in  our  hearts  for  very  often  have 
I  thought  of  thee,  and  often  mentioned  thy  name.  I  rejoice 
in  thy  labours,  and  have  no  doubt  of  their  being  blessed  to 
hundreds  and  thousands.  How  many  places  in  the  kingdom 
mayst  thou  find  where  the  voice  of  a  Friend  has  not  been 
heard  for  thirty  years,  and  many  where  it  has  not  been  heard 
at  all !  Numbers  in  our  society  think,  I  believe,  that  our 
principles  are  well-known,  but  the  more  I  have  been  able  to 
know  of  the  fact,  the  more  I  am  certain  that  they  are  very 
little  known,  and  I  question  if  one  in  a  thousand  of  the  popu- 
lation of  Great  Britain  and  Ireland  have  any  distinct  notion 
of  them — surely  not  even  that  proportion.  I  think  the 
society  might  take  a  little  more  pains  than  it  has  done  in  the 
distribution  of  books  treating  on  its  principles,  by  placing 
them  in  the  public  libraries  of  the  kingdom.  The  more  I 
look  into  them  the  stronger  is  my  conviction  of  their  im- 
portance. 

To  Catherine  Gurney. 

Devonshire-square,  26th  of  6th  mo.,  1841. 

My  dear  Catherine, 

The  touch  of  sympathy  for  me  in  thy  letter  was 
most  truly  grateful.  I  am  thankful  that  I  have  been  enabled 
to  rejoice  with  those  who  rejoice,  and  trust  I  shall  increas- 


yET.  54.] 


1841. 


237 


ingly  be  able  to  do  so  ;  but  I  had  no  idea,  on  coming  up  to 
this  Yearly  Meeting,  how  much  my  spirits  would  have  been 
affected.  The  change  of  circumstances  is  so  great  to  me 
since  last  year,  and  the  contrast  with  the  state  of  others 
seems  to  bring  them  home  with  double  force ;  but  the  fashion 
of  this  world  passes  away,  and  if  we  may  be  but  favoured  to 
have  a  hiding-place  in  Him — the  Rock — all  the  passing 
storms  and  sunshine  of  life,  except  as  they  have  been  found  to 
minister  to  our  attachment  to  Him,  will  soon  be  found  less 
than  nothing  and  vanity.  Though  I  have  had  many  low  ones,  I 
have  had  some  sweet  hours  during  this  Yearly  Meeting,  when 
the  spirits  of  those  we  have  both  dearly  loved  have  been  very 
livingly  before  me,  and  in  their  rest,  and  in  looking  towards 
it,  I  have  rejoiced  in  tears.  My  precious  mother  has  been 
continually  before  me ;  thy  feelings  at  her  loss  seem  to  have 
bound  me  yet  closer  to  thee. 

Trusting  that  all  the  joys  or  sorrows  of  time  we  may  yet 
have  to  pass  through,  may  be  uniting  us  still  closer  in  that 
love  that  changes  not, 

I  am  thy  truly  affectionate  cousin, 

H.  C.  Backhouse. 

To  

Polam  Hill,  11th  of  6th  mo.,  1341. 

My  beloved  Friend, 

Many  times  have  my  thoughts  turned  towards 
you  since  we  parted,  and  especially  so  since  you  gave  up 
coming  to  London.    *    *  * 

We  remained  a  week  at  home,  a  week  of  preparation  and 
some  rest.  Finding  my  dear  husband  better  than  when  we 
left  him,  I  had  no  hesitation  about  going  to  London,  and,  as 
far  as  regarded  him,  left  home  with  an  easy  mind ;  but  my 
spirit  was  low  and  burdened,  which  I  found  increasingly  the 
case  during  the  first  few  days  of  the  Yearly  Meeting,  and 
it  continued  to  be  so,  though  I  had  full  persuasion  that  it 
was  my  place  to  be  there,  and  never  felt  best  help  nearer 
than  in  those  religious  engagements  into  which  I  believed 
myself  called.     *     *     *     Truly  I  have  often  thought  of 


238 


1841. 


[jet.  54. 


thee  in  reference  to  the  exercise  of  that  "  gift"  that  I 
believe  has  been  bestowed  upon  thee :  my  desire  thou  well 
knowest  is  that  thou  mayst  "  fulfil  it.''  I  was  afraid  when 
in  Ireland,  that  of  later  times  thou  hadst  been  under  much 
discouragement  respecting  it.  My  view  is  that  thou  simply 
abide  with  the  gift,  and  not  think  of  the  opinions  of  others 
concerning  it,  and  above  all,  compare  it  not  with  the  gift  of 
any  other ;  for  as  no  two  members  of  the  body  have  the  same 
office,  so  there  must  be  a  diversity  in  the  gifts  to  enable  us 
to  fill  our  respective  ofiices.  It  is  only  as  we  are  faithful  to 
our  individual  charge,  that  we  are  ourselves  kept  in  life  and 
health,  and  are  able  to  edify  the  body.  Thy  offerings  have 
been  very  acceptable  to  me,  but  if  they  do  not  always  bring 
that  evidence  into  thy  mind  afterwards  which  gives  the  sense 
of  acquittal,  I  wish  thou  wouldst  examine  whether  it  may 
not  have  been  from  giving  way  to  fear  in  the  exercise  of  the 
gift  and  thereby  hindering  that  possession  of  the  soul  in 
patience,  in  which  He  our  Lord  is  made  unto  us  mouth  and 
wisdom,  tongue  and  utterance.    *    *    -x-  * 

However,  I  again  repeat,  keep  close  to  thy  own  gift,  and 
do  not  think  thou  hast  received  none,  because  after  the 
exercise  of  it  thou  dost  not  feel  that  satisfaction  thou  couldst 
desire,  but  rather  let  it  lead  thee  into  a  close  examination  in 
what  way  the  earth  of  the  vessel  may  have  hindered  the 
flowing  of  the  pure  water  of  life. 

To  Maria  Fox. 

Leamington,  25th  of  6tli  mo.,  1841. 

My  deae  Maeta, 

*  *  *  *  But  what  with  the  state  of  my 
body  run  down  from  previous  exertions,  and  my  changed 
situation,  in  attending  a  Yearly  Meeting,  without  a  parent,  a 
husband,  or  a  child,  and  with  other  things  that  closely  tried 
my  feelings,  I  think  I  was  hardly  ever  more  continually  under 
depression.  However,  in  the  midst  of  tears  and  sufferings, 
I  was  favoured  to  take  a  part  in  the  labour  of  the  meetings 
with  more  satisfaction  to  my  own  mind,  and  I  believe  more 


54.] 


1841. 


239 


to  the  comfort  of  my  friends,  than  on  any  former  occasion. 
The  course  of  time  had  placed  me  on  the  foremost  seat,  a 
seat  that  I  had  seen  vacated  again  and  again,  and  closely  was 
it  brought  home  to  me,  especially  whilst  the  testimonies  were 
being  read,  how  short  must  be  the  remainder  of  my  course ; 
but  with  this  thought  and  the  remembrance  of  my  dear 
mother's  closing  hour,  a  glance  was  given  me  of  that  kingdom 
of  rest  and  peace  which  stamped  the  words  of  the  apostle, 
"  I  reckon  that  the  sufferings  of  this  present  time  are  not 
worthy  to  be  compared  with  the  glory  which  shall  be 
revealed  in  us." 

The  following  letter  refers  to  the  marriage  of  Joseph 
John  Gurney  with  Eliza  Paul  Kirkbride,  who  had  for 
some  time  been  a  much-valued  inmate  in  the  family  at 
Polam. 

To  Elizabeth  Fry. 

Polam  Hill,  25th  of  10th  mo.,  1841. 

My  BEro\T;D  Cousin, 

*  *  *  *  The  day  of  the  21st  passed  off 
with  as  much  of  entire  and  solid  satisfaction  as  any,  I  think, 
I  can  remember.  A  beautiful  crown  bestowed  by  the  Father 
of  mercies  as  a  reward  of  many  years  of  faithful  service — a 
little  earnest  of  that  crown  which,  we  trust,  will,  when  days 
are  over,  be  worn  by  the  dear  united  ones,  and  by  those  who 
have  been  made  partakers  of  their  joy.  I  have  deeply  felt 
parting  with  her,  but  acknowledge  it  good  and  wholesome  for 
us  that  she  has  her  own  natural  home,  and  feel  very  peaceful 
under  the  separation. 

Thy  very  affectionate  cousin, 

H.  C.  Backhouse. 

To  

Polam  HUI,  27th  of  10th  mo.,  1841. 

My  beloved  Friend, 

*  *  *  *  Life  does  not  want  objects,  yet 
what  object  can  be  pursued  with  comfort,  but  under  some 
sense  of  Divine  approbation  ?    Thou  often  eomplainest  of 


240 


1841. 


[.-ET.  54. 


poverty ;  thou  surely  canst  not,  I  think,  know  mucli  more  of 
it  than  I  have  done ;  but  there  is  such  a  thing  as  joy,  peace 
and  praise — an  inheritance  in  light ;  and  may  we  never  by 
any  discouragement  of  the  enemy  lose  our  part  in  it,  not 
a  part  of  our  own  procuring,  but  reserved  for  us  by  Him 
who  upholdeth  all  things  by  the  word  of  his  power.  I 
do  apprehend,  as  I  always  have  done,  that  thou  art  designed 
to  speak  well  of  his  excellent  name,  and  I  would  have  thee 
fully  patient  as  well  as  faithful  in  the  exercise  of  thy  gift ; 
for,  for  want  of  patience  I  believe  in  many  of  us  it  is  often 
marred,  the  subject  not  clearly  developed,  the  end  too  soon 
come  at ;  and  surely,  though  to  study  the  Scriptures  for  the 
sake  of  using  them  in  jJi'eachiny  could  not  befit  our  principles, 
yet  I  am  increasingly  persuaded,  that  by  the  mind  being 
attentively  fixed  upon  their  sacred  contents  oftener  than  the 
day,  a  store  of  gold  is  obtained,  ready  to  be  coined  at  the 
king's  command. 

I  do  feel  much  interested  in  thy  progress  every  way.  I  do 
not  mean  to  make  preaching  and  real  religious  progress  the 
same  thing;  I  am  sure  I  know  they  often  stand  distinct 
the  one  from  the  other ;  on  the  other  hand,  "  Out  of  the 
abundance  of  the  heart  the  mouth  speak eth." 

To  Maria  Fox. 

Polam  Hill,  6th  of  11th  mo.,  1841. 

My  beloved  Cousix, 

*  4f-  *  *  jyjy  (jg^j,  husband  continues  very 
much  in  the  same  state,  though  in  looking  back  for  a  length 
of  time  we  see  more  of  a  return  to  his  former  habits.  He 
now  almost  regularly  gets  to  meeting  on  First  and  Fifth-day 
mornings.  We  spend  our  evenings  very  pleasantly  together, 
and  my  dear  husband  enjoys  being  read  to ;  his  mind  is 
preserved  in  peace  in  the  midst  of  much  remaining  activity. 

My  dear  girls  and  I  read  the  Old  Testament  together,  for 
a  short  time  after  breakfast.  What  a  comfort  in  hfe  is  the 
Bible !  The  capability  of  enjoying  it  is  one  of  our  greatest 
blessings,  and  is  truly  a  gift ;  yet,  like  many  other  gifts,  to  be 
sought  after  by  using  all  diligence  to  keep  the  heart  and 
mind  upon  it. 


.KT.  54.] 


1841. 


241 


To  

17tli  (.f  nth  mo.,  1841. 

My  i)E.a.r  Cousin, 

*  *  *  *  Tliy  letter  was  very  iuteresting 
to  me,  and  demands  some  explanation  of  my  half-told  views, 
which,  like  other  half-told  things,  are  very  apt  to  create  mis- 
apprehension. I  am  an  enemy  to  costume  for  the  sake  of 
costume;  but  I  am  also  persuaded  that  if  we  bear  a  con- 
sistent testimony  against  that  which  springs  from  vanity, 
decking  the  person  with  ornaments^  and  changeable  suits  of 
apparel,  and  changing  for  the  sake  of  the  fashion,  we  must 
fall  into  a  very  simple  manner  of  dressing,  and  that  very 
much  of  a  uniform  one,  with  the  exception  of  those  real 
improvements  that  tend  both  to  ease  and  health,  and  which 
have  nothing  to  do  with  conformity  to  the  world  for  the  sake 
of  conformity.  In  following  such  a  line  of  conduct,  it  is  self- 
evident  that  we  must  differ  from  the  majority.  But  as  truth 
and  righteousness  have  never  yet  been  supposed  to  be  with 
the  multitude,  common  usage  is  no  argument  for  the  Chris- 
tian ;  and  if  we  differ  from  others  by  a  consistent  testimony 
against  ornament  and  change  of  fashion,  we  must  become 
singular,  and  it  is  this  singularity  which  marks  us  as  Friends  ; 
and  what  we  think  founded  on  right  principles  for  ourselves 
must  also  be  so  for  our  children. 

This  is  tlie  reasonable  view  I  take  of  our  peculiarity  of 
dress.  Simplicity  and  absence  of  ornament  is  undoubtedly  a 
Christian  requirement;  but  the  Church  may  have  rcquirings  in 
one  state  of  mankind  that  might  not  be  necessary  for  her  in 
another.  Were  the  world  not  to  lie  in  wickedness,  as  we 
know  it  does,  there  would  be  no  need  for  the  protection  that 
the  mark  of  being  a  Friend  is  now  known  to  be,  both  to  our 
young  men  and  young  women.    *    *    *  * 

I  am  sure  I  Avould  not  laj'^  any  bonds  upon  our  dear  young 
people,  but  those  of  the  gospel ;  but  I  do  believe  that  the 
more  submissive  they  are  to  these,  the  more  they  will  value 
the  principles  and  peculiar  practices  of  the  Society. 

We  now  enter  on  another  year  of  diligent  service  in 

n 


the  cause  of  lier  Divine  ^Master  ;  a  year  also  marked  by 
sore  bereavement.  From  her  journal  for  this  period 
a  few  particulars  may  be  extracted. 

1st  of  1st  mo.,  1842. — Returned  from  York,  after  more 
than  a  two  weeks'  absence  in  Yorkshire,  with  dear  Ann : 
kept  on  in  faith  from  day  to  day.  Patience  much  tried,  but 
it  had  not  its  perfect  work. 

2nd. — A  day  of  heaviness  of  heart,  in  the  midst  of  so  much 
blessing  :  some  fervent  desires  after  righteousness. 

7th  of  2nd  mo. — Went  to  Newcastle  ;  fixed  Avith  George 
Richardson  to  go  forward  with  rae  to  Scotland  ;  rode  witli 
him  to  Edinburgh. 

12th. — Returned  home  by  myself. 

22??rf. — Went  to  the  IMonthly  Meeting  at  Stockton  with 
my  dear  husband  and  family,  and  obtained  a  certificate  for 
the  East  Riding  of  Yorkshire. 

23rd. — Left  home  early  ;  attended  York  Monthly  Meeting; 
went  on  witli  Mary  Hustler  and  Henry  Tuke  to  York.* 

25th  and  26th. — Visiting  families. 

27th,  First-day. — Good  meeting ;  in  the  evening  a  public 
one. 

2^th. — Visiting  families. 

3rd  of  3rd  ?ho.— Monthly  Meeting  at  Hull — evidently  in 
my  right  place  ;  and  in  the  evening  a  meeting  in  the  Sailors' 
Chapel,  an  old  vessel ;  then  saw  my  way  to  go  home  for  a  few 
hours. 

5^/^. — Went  to  Leamington,  found  the  scene  had  closed  as 
we  expected,  the  morning  before.  [Alluding  to  the  death 
of  a  beloved  nephew,  Robert  Barclay,  jun.] 

Qth,  First-day. — In  the  morning  with  the  mourners;  in  the 
afternoon  at  Warwick  ]Meeting. 

11th. — Assembled  in  the  dining-room  at  Leyton,  (pre- 
viously to  the  interment)  a  very  sweet  occasion.  I  was 
favoured  in  supplication  at  the  grave, — an  excellent  meeting 
afterwards. 


*  Both  these  Friends  were,  in  iliffereut  waya^  amongst  her  most 
faithful  and  devoted  helpers  in  this  part  of  her  course. 


MT.  55.] 


1842. 


243 


1 7ih. — Quarterly  Meeting  at  Lincoln,  and  public  meeting 
afterwards. 

21*/. — Visiting  families,  and  a  public  meeting. 

24th. — Small  meeting  at  Hatfield  in  the  morning;  a  large 
and  very  satisfactory  one  at  Epworth  in  the  evening. 

SOth. — Visiting  families_,  and  capital  public  meeting ;  a 
liappy  conclusion  to  my  labours  at  present. 

31.9/. — Happy  and  peaceful  arrival  at  home,  with  dear 
Mary  Hustler. 

5ih  of  4th  mo. — Our  own  Quarterly  Meeting  a  very  com- 
fortable one ;  and  enjoyed  Friends'  company  afterwards. 

ISth. — The  thought  of  going  out  before  Yearly  Meeting 
distressing  and  pei'plexing. 

\9th. — Concluded  to  go  to  Whitby  ;  my  faith  confirmed  at 
their  INIonthly  Meeting.  John  and  Martha  Yeardley  libe- 
rated for  the  Continent ;  meeting  at  Aisleby  in  the  evening, 
a  day  of  favour. 

20th. — Calls  in  the  morning,  capital  public  meeting  in  the 
evening  ;  sore  tossin2;s  about  going  forward  to  Scarborough. 

Whitby,  24th,  First-day, — Interesting  meeting  in  the 
morning,  at  which  many  attended,  and  a  very  large  public 
one  in  the  evening. 

Meetings  were  held  at  many  of  the  little  fishing 
villages  in  the  neighbourhood  of  Whitby,  and  several 
in  that  town  ;  to  which,  in  her  view,  a  more  than  com- 
mon interest  attached,  from  the  fact  of  the  many  rela- 
tions on  her  mother's  side  who  lived  there.'^ 

In  one  of  these  meetings  the  principles  of  Friends 
were  in  a  striking  manner  unfolded.  It  was  not  un- 
frequently  the  case,  both  here  aiid  in  America,  that 
where  two  or  three  meetings  were  held  in  the  same 
place,  she  was,  in  the  last  of  the  series,  engaged  to  speak 
on  the  distinguishing  views  of  the  religious  Society  of 
which  she  was  a  member — fully  believing,  as  she  did, 

*  Her  mother,  Jane  Guruey,  was  the  daughter  of  William  Chapman, 
of  "Whitby ;  a  man  so  highly  respected  for  his  integrity,  that  he  used  to  go 
among  his  neiglibonrs  by  the  name  of  "  honest  William  Chapman." 

II  2 


244 


1842. 


[.ET.  55. 


that  these  yicvvs  were  but  the  practical  carrying  out 
of  the  doctrines  and  precepts  of  our  Lord  and  his 
apostles. 

I2th  of  5th  mo. — An  interesting  meeting,  the  funeral  of 
G.  P/s  child.  The  evanescent  nature  of  the  joys  and 
sorrows  of  time  expatiated  upon  from  the  text,  "  In  the 
day  of  prosperity  be  joyful,  but  in  the  day  of  adversity 
consider.''  We  set  off  for  London  ;  a  quiet  ride,  in  which  I 
enjoyed  reading  the  Scriptures,  and  had  some  aspirations 
after  preservation  and  right  acting  towards  all. 

i4;th. — Resting,  but  with  a  heavy  heart. 

21*^. — Meeting  at  Peel ;  one  for  the  nobility  in  the  after- 
noon, at  Westminster;  and  another  for  the  Jews  in  the 
evening  :  altogether  a  day  to  be  thankful  for. 

dth  of  Qth  mo. — The  wedding  of  my  dear  nephew  Joseph 
Gurney  Barclay  with  Mary  Walker  Leatham.  Thankful,  I 
trust,  for  the  favours  of  this  day,  and  for  the  part  I  was 
enabled  to  act  in  it.  Few  days  have  left  a  more  unclouded 
recollection. 

Wth. — Arrived  at  the  Grove  at  noon  ;  a  peaceful  feeling  in 
being  there. 

\2th. — At  Guilding-croft  meeting  in  the  morning.  Goat- 
lane  in  the  evening ;  a  day  of  peace. 

During  the  next  few  weeks,  she  had  much  religious 
labour  in  Norfolk  and  Suffolk,  interspersed  with  several 
days  of  happy  domestic  and  social  interest.  Towards 
the  close  of  the  Seventh  Month  she  w^ent  into  Yorkshire, 
and  attended  the  General  Meetings  at  Ackworth  and 
Ay  ton. 

\st  of  Sth  mo.— Craved  on  waking,  that  my  thoughts, 
words  and  actions,  might  be  acceptable  this  day,  that  patient 
endurance  of  privations  and  labour  might  be  mine.  Visited 
five  families,  and  had  a  comfortable  public  meeting  at 
Staiuton-dale,  in  the  evening;  but  very  sensible  through  the 


XT.  55.] 


18i.2. 


245 


day  of  bodily  and  mental  influences.  Enjoyed  the  reading  of 
the  Bible,  to  me  the  most  palatable  food  I  got  in  the  day. 

2nd. — Five  family  visits  in  the  morning  ;  mind  low  enough, 
but  endeavouring  to  bear  my  allotment  with  patience.  A  very 
good  meeting  in  a  barn  cheered  me. 

3rd. — At  meeting  silent ;  visited  afterwards  a  family,  poor 
and  afflicted ;  a  lesson  to  be  more  of  a  contented  and  grateful 
spirit :  perhaps  it  was  worth  some  suffering  to  give  them  a 
little  comfort. 

8th. — Had  two  interesting  family  visits ;  then  I  called  on 
11.  M.  Beverley,  and  felt  satisfied  with  doing  so.  Dined  at 
Hannah  Stephenson's.  A  sweet  visit  to  the  Nortons  in  their 
neighbouring  lodging ;  then  to  tea  at  F.  Grey's  ;  a  precious 
visit  we  had,  and  a  good  meeting  at  a  village  near.  A  return 
to  Scarboro'  ended  a  day  of  great  peace. 

9th. — Rose  early,  and  had  a  nice  visit  to  a  young  woman. 
After  a  deep  plunge  in  spirit  to  begin  with,  had  a  most  refresh- 
ing meeting  in  the  Baptist  Meeting-house  at  Kilham ;  and 
Avent  on  to  Driffield. 

LOth. — Returned  in  the  morning  to  visit  some  of  our 
Kilham  friends.  How  many  serious  people  there  are  more 
prepared,  perhaps,  to  instruct  me,  than  I  them  ! 

14th. — Greatly  refreshed  with  the  rest  of  yesterday.  Meet- 
ing with  the  Friends  of  Bridlington  in  the  morning ;  house 
very  old,  attenders  very  few.  I  believe  I  was  helped  to 
say  the  right  thing,  and  I  felt  peaceful  afterwards.  Had  a 
large  meeting  in  the  Wesleyan  Chapel,  in  the  evening ;  close 
and  sound  Christian  doctrine  was  preached,  the  people  were 
attentive,  and  some  spoke  to  me  kindly  afterwards.  I  felt 
easy,  but  not  abounding,  after  it. 

15th. — A  meeting  at  Smeeton,  in  a  barn;  a  comfortable 
one. 

IQth. — Went  on  to  Scarboro',  to  the  Monthly  Meeting, 
which  proved  a  time  of  real  refreshment  both  to  myself  and 
my  friends. 

Idth. — Visited  families  in  the  morning,  in  the  evening  a 
meeting  nine  miles  off ;  came  home  peaceful  at  the  end  of 
this  laborious  day.  The  sense  of  Friends  being  in  a  comfort- 
able state  in  this  meeting,  cheering.  Dear  M.  Hustler  very 
kind  to  me. 


246 


1842 


[.JiT.  55. 


20th. — A  visit  or  two  iu  the  morning;  rode  into  the 
couutrjr  iu  the  afternoon,  and  had  an  interesting  family  visit 
to  R.  R.;  and  on  returning  in  peace  went  to  the  Inn,  where 
I  had  the  great  comfort  of  meeting  my  dear  husband  and 
daughters,  and  John  Ilodgkin  and  his  little  girls. 

21st. — An  interesting  First-day.  Had  my  dear  husband 
by  me  at  both  meetings ;  a  relieving  one  with  Friends  in  the 
morning,  and  a  very  large  one  with  the  public  in  the  evening ; 
a  day  to  be  thankful  for;  full  of  domestic  enjoyment,  in  the 
favour  of  Him  without  whose  sunshine  no  comforts  are  to  be 
truly  enjoyed;  but  in  it,  husband,  children,  and  comfortable 
accommodations  are  delights. 

25th. — Rose,  ardently  desiring  that  the  day  might  be  spent 
in  a  Christian  spirit.  Excellent  meeting  in  the  evening  at 
Scarboro'. 

26th. — Went  to  Thornton  and  had  a  favoured  meeting  in  the 
evening  at  Pickering ;  my  dear  husband  by  me  in  the  pulpit. 

Whitby,  2Sth. — This  was  a  day  of  very  close  trial  to  me ; 
two  meetings  of  Friends  to  which  the  public  were  invited, 
and  good  solid  meetings  they  were.  Fatigued  in  body  and 
low  in  mind. 

31s/. — Attended  a  little  meeting  at  Pickering ;  in  the 
evening  at  Teddington,  a  comfortable  day. 

1*/  of  9th  mo. — Stayed  at  our  comfortable  home  in  the 
morning,  and  in  the  evening  an  excellent  meeting  at 
Brompton,  and  an  interesting  visit  afterwards  to  Sir  John  and 
Lady  K.,  and  many  that  were  with  them ;  who  received  us 
courteously  and  kindly. 

4:th. — A  very  good  large  meeting  at  Kirby-Moorside,  in 
the  Methodist  ]\Ieeting-house ;  a  day  altogether  to  be  very 
thankful  for,  in  the  midst  of  great  bodily  weakness. 

Qth. — Attended  the  funeral  of  a  worthy  old  man,  eighty- 
four  years  of  age ;  a  heavenly  sense  of  his  blessedness,  and 
a  good  meeting.  Got  into  the  carriage  and  dined  on  the 
road ;  great  peace  flowed  in  my  heart.  Arrived  at  home  a 
little  past  seven  o'clock,  to  the  delight  of  all ;  so  in  mercy 
felt  I  came  home  in  right  time. 

\Qth. — This  evening  with  my  own  family — a  true  luxury  to 
be  quiet,  and  with  them — but  an  exhausted  frame  produced 
some  depression  ;  on  all  the  glory  there  is  a  defence. 


.m\  5a.] 


1812. 


247 


IGih. — An  excellent  meeting  in  the  Eethcl  Meeting- 
house, Scarboro'— a  gleam  of  light  for  a  poor  weary 
traveller. 

IQth. — Rose  early  and  came  to  the  Monthly  Meeting  at 
Castleton,  in  great  peace  of  mind.  Rode  home  afterwards 
with  dear  Jane ;  a  shower  of  celestial  rain  was  poured  upon 
my  soul.  Heartily  received  at  home,  and  with  my  dear 
husband  at  the  select  meeting — a  heavenly  time  never  to  be 
forgotten, — something  like  being  on  the  verge  of  heaven ; 
such  it  will  probably  be  to  some  present. 

20th. — A  sweet  comfortable  evening  with  my  dear  family. 

23rd. — Went  to  Thornton-in-the-Clay.  A  small  Friends' 
meeting  with  some  neighbours,  rather  reviving  to  my  faith, 
which  had  been  low  enough. 

24//i. — A  meeting  in  the  evening  at  Plelmsley.  In  the 
morning,  an  interesting  visit,  with  my  brother  William,  to 
Lady  r.  and  her  famih^ 

27th. — Went  to  York  to  the  Quarterly  Meeting ;  peaceful 
in  going,  and  met  with  a  hearty  welcome  at  the  Select 
Meeting.  ♦ 

2dth. — The  concluding  meeting  ended  to  my  mind  iu  peace  ; 
got  home  very  comfortable. 

30th. — Blessed  with  an  evening  at  home  and  to  ourselves. 

1^^  of  10th  mo. — Rode  with  my  dear  husband  round  by 
Blackwell  and  Cockerton;  a  beautiful  morning:  a  peaceful  yet 
saddened  heart. 

27id. — With  Maria  Tuke  and  James  Backhouse  attended 
a  large  meeting  at  Huby ;  rode  on  to  Thirsk ;  meeting  iu  a 
barn  at  Felskirk  ;  rode  six  or  eight  miles  further,  to  a  verv 
interesting  meeting  at  Silton,  and  returned  to  Thirsk. 

3rd. — Returned  to  Darlington  by  the  mail  train.  A  sweet 
meeting  [Quarterly  Meeting  of  ministers  and  elders.]  After 
the  list  of  our  members  was  read,  I  spoke  a  short  time  on 
the  blessedness  of  death.    I  was  very  peaceful. 

4:th. — Quarterly  Meeting,  relieving  to  my  mind  ;  I  spoke 
in  supplication  at  the  end  of  the  first  meeting. 

oth. — Several  relations  and  friends  with  us  ;  a  sweet 
evening  indeed  !  much  pleasant  conversation.  At  the  end,  a 
heavenly  opportunity,  our  souls  flowed  together ;  my  dear 
husband  with  us,  a.s  well  as  usual. 


248 


1812. 


[-ET.  55. 


7th. — Breakfasted  early.  Henry  Tuke  and  Edward 
Backhouse  Jun.,  went  off  to  appoint  a  meeting  at  Stokesley. 
Left  home  after  an  early  dinner,  with  ]\Iary  Hustler  and  dear 
Ann.  A  large  meeting  at  Stokesley,  my  mind  oppressed ; 
but  about  ten  o'clock  a  sweet  feeling  of  calm  came  over  me. 
I  went  to  bed  and  slept  soundly,  and  was  awaked  by  a  rap  at 
the  door.  Edward  brought  a  letter,  from  which  I  at  first 
thought  dear  Edmund  was  gone  ;  but  after  a  time  I  found  it 
was  my  beloved  husband.  The  agony  I  have  since  suffered 
and  the  proving  of  my  faith,  in  being  then  absent  from 
him,  and  so  little  with  him  of  late,  may  make  me  go  softly 
in  the  bitterness  of  my  soul  many  days,  if  not  all  the  days  of 
my  life. 

The  closing  struggle  was  so  short  that  had  she  been 
at  home  her  presence  would  probably  have  been  of  little 
avail ;  yet,  in  the  anguish  of  her  heart,  she  looked  back 
upon  her  absence  at  the  solemn  moment  with  an  ex- 
aggerated feeling  of  regret. 

The  decease  of  Jonathan  Backliouse  took  place 
about  ten  o'clock  on  the  night  of  the  7th  of  the  Tenth 
Month.  The  evening  had  been  passed  with  the  usual 
tranquillity  ;  but  he  had  scarcely  retired  to  bed  when 
another  paralytic  seizure  occurred,  so  suddenly  affecting 
the  vital  organs,  that,  notwithstanding  active  measures 
were  promptly  resorted  to,  life  rapidly  ebbed,  and  all 
M'as  over  in  less  than  half  an  hour. 

The  folloAA-ing  are  extracts  from  H.  C.  Backhouse's 
memoranda,  penned  after  her  return  home  : — 

This  morning,  as  our  family  circle  were  collected  in  the 
drawing-room,  I  said  that  no  one  present  could  possibly 
estimate  the  depth  of  my  sufferings  during  the  last  few 
months,  in  leaving  my  beloved  husband,  but  I  had  been  com- 
forted in  the  thought  that  if  I  had  been  instrumental  in 
bringing  one  immortal  soul  (the  price  of  which  in  this  world 
wc  could  never  value)  nearer  to  its  God,  I  believed  it  would 


55.] 


1842. 


249 


now  be  the  joy  of  a  redeemed  spirit  in  heaven.  In  giving 
me  up  as  he  had  done,  I  believed  it  liad  been  an  acceptable 
sacrifice  to  his  God.  *  *  *  *  I  have  been  in  to  see 
the  body  this  afternoon, — past  life  rose  vividly  in  remem- 
brance. *  *  *  *  Well,  if  in  a  few  more  short  fleeting 
years  we  may  meet  before  the  throne,  a  family  in '  heaven 
(which  T  have  an  unshaken  belief  we  shall),  all  tears  will  be 
wiped  from  our  eyes,  and  there  will  be  no  more  corroding 
care,  nor  any  business  but  that  of  love. 

12th. — May  the  truth,  in  all  its  beauty  and  simplicity, 
prevail  over  us  to-morrow  [the  day  of  the  interment],  under 
the  heavenly  canopy  of  love.  And  under  the  sense  of  being 
so  much  nearer  heaven,  may  the  language  be  applicable : 
"  Better  is  the  end  of  a  thing  than  the  beginning,  and  the 
day  of  our  death  than  the  day  of  our  birth." 

On  another  occasion,  being  assembled  with  her  chil- 
dren and  two  or  three  near  connexions,  she  prayed 
most  touchingly  and  impressively  for  them,  and  for 
herself,  "  the  most  solitary  one,"  the  "  worm  of  the 
dust,"  whom  the  Lord  had  been  pleased  to  bless  with 
the  precious  gift  of  such  a  husband  ;  who  had,  together 
wdth  her,  passed  through  many  cares,  perplexities  and 
sorrows  ;  but  who  had  also  been  permitted  to  share  with 
her  some  seasons  rich  in  temporal  blessings,  and  some 
moments  of  celestial  joy.  She  petitioned  that,  during  the 
days  of  her  solitude,  which  could  not  now  be  many,  the 
Lord  would  be  her  refuge  and  strength, — would  enable 
her,  with  increasing  calmness,  to  discern  his  will,  and 
with  increasing  faithfulness  to  do  it ;  and  that,  at  last, 
she  also  might  be  permitted  to  join  in  the  endless  song 
of  praise. 

Having  now  seen  the  close  of  Jonathan  Backhouse's 
useful  and  honourable  course,  a  glance  at  some  of  the 
features  of  his  character  will  not  be  out  of  place. 


250 


1842. 


\_MT.  55. 


His  was  emphatically  a  loving  spirit,  and  he  had  a 
lively  sympathy  with  human  weal  and  woe.  With  him 
the  exercise  of  generosity  was  not  merely  a  duty,  it 
was  truly  a  dehglit.  Regardless  of  consequences, 
he  would  throw  himself  into  the  gap  to  rescue  those 
whom  he  saw  in  trouble,  sparing  neither  time  nor  ex- 
pense to  alleviate  distress  or  to  confer  pleasure.  Diffi- 
culties, instead  of  deterring  him,  increased  the  zest  with 
which  he  pursued  the  object  before  him.  This  ardent 
temperament,  in  reference  to  everj^thing  which  he 
undertook,  occasionally  led  him,  as  some  might  think, 
beyond  the  bounds  of  discretion,  and  exposed  him  to 
needless  sacrifices,  and  even  to  the  censure  of  others. 

His  capacity  for  social  enjoyment  was  large,  and, 
Avhether  as  host  or  as  guest,  the  pleasure  which  he  both 
received  and  imparted  will  be  long  vividly  remem- 
bered by  those  who  had  the  jorivilege  of  his  society. 
The  observance  of  the  apostolic  injunction  to  "  be 
kindly  affectioned  one  to  another  with  brotherly 
love,  in  honour  preferring  one  another,"  was  to  him 
rendered  easy,  both  by  nature  and  by  grace  ;  his  diffi- 
dence and  forgetfulness  of  self,  contributing  to  it,  as  well 
as  that  charity  and  humility  which,  in  the  Christian 
disciple,  are  fruits  of  the  Spirit. 

He  was,  from  early  life,  a  lover  of  good  men,  and 
warmly  attached  to  the  religious  society  of  which  he 
was  a  member.  His  private  memoranda  indicate  the 
work  of  grace  upon  his  soul,  and  shew  that  the  call  was 
from  time  to  time  renewed  to  set  his  affijctions  on  things 
above  ;  and,  notwithstanding  the  various,  and  at  times 
absorbing,  interests  and  duties  of  a  temporal  nature  in 
which  he  was  engaged,  they  furnish  unequivocal  evidence 
that  he  was  exercised  to  "  seek  first  the  kingdom  of 
God  and  his  righteousness." 


^:t.  55.]  251 

As  lie  approached  middle  life,  he  was  made  increas- 
ingly willing  to  dedicate  himself  to  the  service  of  his 
Lord,  and  when  his  beloved  wife  was  called  to  enter, 
as  a  diligent  labonrer  into  the  harvest-field,  he  en- 
couraged her  to  the  work,  and  for  many  years  he  not 
only  shared  her  labours,  but  his  substance,  his  time, 
and  his  patience  also,  were  largely  taxed, — and  most 
willingly  was  the  tax  paid — to  aid  her  in  the  perform- 
ance of  all  that  her  hand  found  to  do.  It  was  most 
frequently  as  her  companion  that  he  went  forth  in  the 
work  of  the  ministry  ;  yet  he  had  manifestly  a  distinct 
service,  and  it  was  evident  that,  even  between  those 
thus  closely  connected  by  nature  and  grace,  there  were 
differences  of  administration,  though  they  moved  under 
the  same  spirit,  at  the  command  of  the  same  Lord. 

In  addition  to  the  extensive  and  multifarious  religious 
services  in  which  he  was  engaged  in  England,  Scot- 
land and  Ireland,  and  on  the  Continent  of  America, 
Jonathan  Backhouse  found  time  to  be  an  active  and 
generous  patron  of  the  Bible  and  School  Societies,  as 
well  as  a  labourer  in  the  cause  of  the  negro  race,  whether 
bond  or  free  ;  and  few  have  taken  a  more  lively  interest 
than  he  did  in  the  protection  of  the  Aborigines  of  various 
countries  from  the  wrongs  and  cruelties  inflicted  on 
them  by  civilized  man. 

With  such  varied  objects  for  the  good  of  others,  in 
addition  to  extensive  concerns  in  business,  and  attention 
to  public  affairs,  including  the  formation  of  the  first 
railway  company,*  in  which,  in  concert  with  his  relative 
Edward  Pease  and  other  gentlemen,  he  took  a  pro- 
minent and  efficient  part,  his  was  indeed  a  full  and 
laborious  life.    How  precious,  in  the  contemplation  of 


*  The  Stockton  and  Darlingcon  Railway. 


252  1842;  lm\  55. 

such  a  labourer,  is  the  undoubting  assurance  that, 
after  all  his  toils,  he  has  now,  through  the  mercy  of 
God  in  Christ  Jesus,  entered  into  that  holy  and 
undefiled  and  eternal  rest  which  is  prepared  for  the 
people  of  God ! 


.•ET.  55.] 


1812. 


253 


CHAPTER  XVI. 

REMOVAL  TO  NORWICH  SERVICES  IN  MANCHESTER  ATTENDS  LONDON 

AND      DUBLIN     YEARLY    MEETINGS  WALES  INDISPOSITION  

RETURN  TO  DARLINGTON  ^VISIT    TO    FAMILIES     IN    BRISTOL  TO 

THE  PRISONER    "  TAWELL."  DEATH   OF   HER  DAUGHTER. 

To  Maria  Fox. 

29th  of  10th  mo.,  1842. 

My  dear  Makia, 

Thy  affectionate  note  was  very  welcome  to 
me ;  I  felt  so  sure  of  its  honesty.  The  great  loss  I  have 
sustained  has  given  me  a  deep  and  awful  plunge,  and 
placed  me  in  another  stage  of  existence.  There  has  been  a 
long  preparation  for  it,  and  yet  the  event  took  place  in  a  very 
unlooked-for  moment.  I  do  not  feel  inclined  now  to  men- 
tion circumstances,  some  of  which  were  almost  overwhelming 
to  me  at  the  time.  When  I  look  on  this  earth,  there  appears 
a  few  more  years  of  labour  and  of  suffering,  intermingled 
with  many  of  those  joys  wliich  a  heart,  often  broken  to 
pieces,  is  capable  of  receiving  both  from  within  and  from 
without.  Never  were  the  joys  of  another  state  of  being 
brought  so  closely  before  me,  and  there  have  been  moments 
of  substantial  peace,  in  which,  I  can  have  no  doubt,  I  have 
tasted  of  the  happiness  of  the  redeemed — hours  in  some  of  our 
meetings  and  in  our  social  circle,  just  before  the  awful  event, 
which  were  as  "  the  gate  of  heaven."  I  can  dwell  on  these 
things  at  favoured  moments,  and  feel  the  joy  and  peace  of 


251. 


1842. 


55. 


believing  in  those  great  truths,  of  which  the  resurrection 
from  the  dead  seems  as  a  corner  stone.    *    *    *  * 

Shortly  after  the  death  of  her  husband,  H.  C. 
Backhouse  went  with  her  family  to  Norwich,  and  made 
the  Grove  [formerly  the  residence  of  her  parents],  her 
home  during  the  ensuing  year. 

Grove,  16/A  of  Wth  mo. — Came  home  to  many  kind  letters ; 
and  then  a  walk  about  the  place  with  dear  Ann,  looking  after 
it,  and  seeing  many  things  out  of  repair.  Many,  many 
mercies  to  be  thankful  for,  in  this  last  stage  of  my  pil- 
grimage.   May  I  in  it,  get  nearer  and  nearer  to  my  God  ! 

2'bth. — My  own  mind  seems  losing  much  of  the  stayedness 
and  sweetness  it  had  on  first  arriving  here ;  the  cares  of  the 
world  so  much  beset  it,  the  storehouse  of  my  mind  so  full  of 
trifles.  How  I  should  like  to  have  a  mind  full  of  rich  good 
thoughts  ;  but  the  executive  of  life  is  always  bearing  upon 
them ! 

Wth  of  \2th  mo. — O  Lord!  take  compassion  on  me,  for 
I  am  a  widow  and  desolate;  and  if  thy  wisdom  and  strength 
be  not  given  to  me,  what  is  to  become  of  thy  poor  fearful 
creature  ?  Give  me  wisdom  this  day  to  direct  my  steps 
aright. 

To  Maria  Fox. 

Grove,  13th  of  12th  mo.,  1842. 

My  beloved  old  Friend  and  Cousin, 

I  turn  from  weeping  over  a  very  interesting 
account  of  the  illness  and  death  of  my  dear  sister  Elizabeth 
Barclay,  (written  by  mj  dear  brother  for  me  when  I  was  in 
America),  to  write  to  thee.  Oh,  the  sufferings  that  have  been 
passed  through  from  generation  to  generation  !  We  hear  of 
them  in  part,  but  the  fulness  of  them  is  only  known  by  Him 
who  tasted  death  for  every  man,  and  who,  in  all  our  afflictions, 
is  afflicted.  And  yet  to  contemplate  the  glory  that  shall 
follow,  where  the  heart  is  fixed,  trusting  in  the  Lord,  has  not 
unfrequently  been  my  high  privilege  of  late,  (the  nature  of 


tliat  glory  surely,  not  the  tlogroc,)  so  that  it  is  at  times  sweet 
to  weep  for  the  dead  that  die  in  the  Lord ;  they  rest  from 
their  labours,  and  their  works  do  follow  them.  *  *  *  * 
A  pause  in  life  seems  now  to  be  given  me ;  and  under 
the  restraining  calming  influence  of  heavenly  love,  and 
natural  affection  too,  I  have  enjoyed  many  hours  with 
the  remnant  of  my  family,  in  a  place  where  so  many  tears 
have  been  shed,  and  so  many  favours  from  heaven  received. 

*      *      i|:      =i=  =i< 

Whilst  in  Liverpool,  attending  the  interment  of  her 
friend  Abigail  Dockray,  her  mind  was  brought  into 
exercise  for  religious  service  in  Manchester  ;  but  she 
had  no  minute  for  it,  and  family  claims  seemed  to 
require  her  presence  at  home.  She  accordingly  returned 
to  Norwich,  but  here  she  found  no  rest  for  her  de- 
voted spirit.  Under  the  kind  escort  of  her  valued 
friend  William  Forster,  she  went  down  to  Manchester, 
and  attended  the  First-day  meetings  there  ;  but  it 
became  evident  that  she  must  enter  more  fully  upon 
her  Master's  work  in  that  place,  and  accordingly,  after 
much  conflict  of  mind,  she  proceeded  to  Darlington, — 
of  which  Monthly  Meeting  she  was  still  a  member, — and 
obtained  a  certificate  for  visiting  families  in  ^lanchesler, 
as  well  as  for  service  in  the  West  of  England.  In  the 
course  of  this  engagement  she  went  to  Norwich,  to  be 
present  at  the  marriage  of  her  beloved  daughter  Ann 
with  John  Hodgkin,  Jun.,  of  Tottenham,  of  which  event 
she  writes  : — 

Fifth-day,  \Qth  of  2nd  mo. — The  wedding  at  the  Giiilding- 
Croft ;  a  day,  I  trust,  to  be  remembered  with  gratitude. 
Order,  spiritual  and  temporal,  seemed  to  be  well  kept ;  but 
it  is  a  great  change  to  me  ;  another  seal  that  the  fashion 
of  this  world  passes  away. 


25C  1818.  [.ET.  56. 

To  Ejima  Pease. 

Grove,  IGtli  of  2iul  mo..  184.3. 

My  beloved  Sistek, 

Another  stage  in  my  eventful  life  well  and 
happily  passed  over.  The  order  of  the  day,  natui'al  and 
spiritual,  has  been  solid  and  satisfactory,  in  full  accordance 
I  have  thought  with  the  views  and  feelings  of  those  whose 
mortal  remains  were  not  far  from  us,  as  well  as  of  those  still 
-more  brought  to  our  remembrance.    *    *    *  * 

You  were  married  in  the  same  place,  which  I  have  no 
regrets  that  we  have  chosen  for  the  solemnization  of  this. 
So  life  passes  on ;  I  feel  this  event  as  the  receding  of  this 
world  from  under  my  feet,  as  I  did  the  last  as  the  opening 
towards  another ;  however,  wherever  peace  reigns,  there  is  a 
substance  of  an  enduring  nature  delightful  to  lay  hold  of. 

With  dear  love  to  you  all, 

Thy  truly  affectionate  Sister, 

n.  C.  Backhouse. 

Shortly  afterwards,  she  resumed  lier  religious  labours 
in  Manchester,  and  very  seasonable  they  were  to  that 
large  and  interesting,  but  stricken  meeting. 

It  was,  however,  a  time  of  considerable  suffering  to 
herself  ;  for,  although  she  found  many  kind  friends  in 
the  places  which  she  visited,  yet  perhaps  at  no  former 
period  of  her  ixiblic  ministry  had  she  been  so  com- 
pletely deprived  of  companionship  and  help  in  the 
work  ;  a  succour  on  which  she  had  possibly  become  too 
dependant. 

3rd  of  Srd  mo. — Had  a  nice  sitting  with  the  Fletchers,  and 
saw  some  of  their  young  men  ;  to  a  boy  of  fourteen  I  said  a 
few  words,  and,  very  weary,  thought  I  had  done  my  business 
very  poorly ;  but  to  my  encouragement  saw  the  tears  run 
down  the  poor  boy's  cheeck.  Eode  to  meeting  a  few  miles 
off,  doubting  that  I  had  any  capacity  for  the  work.    At  length 


,r:v.  56.] 


1843. 


257 


I  ventured  to  rise,  and  abundance  of  matter  flowed  tliat 
might  in  some  degree  have  been  prepared  in  the  furnace  of 
my  own  tried  soul.  On  coming  home  to  Anne  Marsden, 
"  I  am  sure/'  she  said,  "  the  Lord  hath  sent  thee so  I  feel 
comforted. 

10^^. — I  feel  this  a  truly  heart-searching  dispensation, — a 
breaking  of  my  dependences ;  but  I  trust  a  little  progress  is 
making  in  resignation.    *    *    *  * 

Oh  !  I  have  been  low  indeed,  but  this  evening  a  little  com- 
forted by,  I  trust,  some  good  patient  work;  but  it  is  truly 
humbling  to  be  going  about  in  this  way. 

22nd. — In  a  very  weak  state.  Lydia  Nield's  company  has 
been  a  great  support  and  comfort  to  me. 


Except  the  attendance  of  her  own  Quarterly  Meeting, 
her  work  amongst  Friends  and  others  in  this  place, 
and  in  several  other  parts  of  Lancashire,  was  continued 
with  little  intermission,  till  the  approach  of  the  Yearly 
Meeting  in  Dublin. 


1st  of  4ith  mo. — The  joint  conference,  in  which  Rachel 
Pi'iestman  and  John  Pease  were  liberated  to  go  to  America,  a 
very  interesting  time.  In  the  afternoon  heard  the  testimony 
concerning  my  beloved  husband;  it  was  deeply  affecting  to  me, 
bringing  into  close  review  the  years  we  had  spent  together, 
their  sorrows,  and  their  mistakes.  Still,  with  all  the  difS- 
culties  and  trials,  outward  and  inward,  which  we  had  had 
to  pass  through,  I  believe  our  way  was  making  towards  our 
heavenly  inheritance ;  and  in  a  foretaste  thereof  many  were 
the  precious  hours  we  passed  together,  both  in  and  out  of 
meetings,  in  true  unity  of  spirit,  and  in  the  bond  of  peace. 
He  has  now  entered  upon  it;  his  toils  are  over.  I  inex- 
pressibly miss  him  ;  still  the  hope  rises  triumphant  over  all 
the  weaknesses  of  flesh  and  spirit,  that,  through  the  mercy 
of  Him  of  whose  love  we  have  often  partaken,  we  shall 

s 


258 


1843. 


[vET.  56. 


finally  be  brought  together  before  His  throne,  and  unite 
in  the  song  of  Moses,  the  servant  of  God,  and  in  the  song 
of  the  Lamb ;  knowing  the  end  of  our  faith,  the  salvation 
of  our  souls. 

2Sth. — Crossed  with  a  peaceful  mind  to  Dublin,  under 
some  sense  of  the  presence  of  Him,  whose  favour  I  do 
believe,  after  all  my  sore  conflicts,  is  granted  me. 

Dublin,  6th  of  5th  mo. — To-day  will,  I  expect,  end  this 
Yearly  Meeting  :  I  believe  it  has  been  well  that  I  have 
been  here.  I  have  been  most  kindly  received  by  my  friends, 
and  peace  has  attended  my  labours  as  generally  as  is  usual 
with  me, — more  so  I  think. 

After  the  Yearly  Meeting  in  London,  she  writes  : — 

The  first  week  of  the  Yearly  Meeting,  especially  the 
attendance  of  the  Select  Meetings,  was  a  time  to  my  mind 
of  peculiar  favour ;  the  darkness  was  past,  and  the  clear 
light  of  the  Sun  of  Righteousness  gladdened  my  inmost 
soul.  In  the  second  week  of  the  Yearly  Meeting  we  had 
many  comfortable  times.  The  next  First-day  was  one  of 
great  favour :  at  Plaistow,  in  the  morning,  I  very  much 
relieved  my  mind,  and  in  the  evening  at  Devonshire  HousCj 
a  few  Jews  came  in  ;  and  my  heart  expanded  towards  them. 
The  next  day  attended  the  Morning  Meeting,  and  went  after- 
wards to  Colchester — was  at  the  Select  meeting  there — a 
favoured  time  it  was. 

After  visiting  the  Quarterly  Meetings  of  Bristol  and 
Somerset,  and  of  CornVall,  H.  C.  Backhouse  attended 
the  General  Meeting  for  Hereford,  Worcester,  and 
Wales,  held  at  Brecon.  At  this  place  was  held  the 
first  of  a  series  of  meetings,  which  occupied  several 
weeks,  extending  through  different  parts  of  the  counties 
of  Brecon,  Glamorgan,  Carmarthen,  and  Pembroke.  The 


.KT.  50.] 


1813. 


259 


time  was  one  of  great  excitement  among  the  peasantry, 
in  connexion  with  the  "  Rebekah  riots,"  an  insurrec- 
tionary movement  directed  against  the  number  of 
turnpike  gates  and  the  heavy  tolls  levied  on  a  popu- 
lation very  unable  to  bear  them.  In  the  manufacturing 
districts,  also,  it  was  a  period  marked  by  Chartist 
agitation,  and  the  spread  to  some  extent,  of  infidel 
opinions.  Yet  was  the  way  remarkably  made  for  the 
gospel  labours  and  plain  practical  exhortations  of  this 
devoted  servant,  and  that  among  various  classes  of 
the  community. 

The  workmen  employed  in  the  large  iron  works 
flocked  to  the  meetings  appointed  at  Merthyr  Tydvil, 
Tredegar,  Ebbw  Vale,  and  Aberdare,  and  the  inter- 
mediate and  adjacent  villages  ;  and  in  many  instances 
successive  meetings  were  held  in  the  same  place,  with 
a  growing  interest  among  the  inhabitants.  In  the 
course  of  this  service,  her  friend  J oseph  Tregelles  Price, 
of  Neath  Abbey,  was  her  most  efficient  helper.  On 
finally  quitting  Merthyr  and  its  neighbourhood,  H.  C. 
Backhouse  left  there  a  number  of  Friends'  books, 
for  the  use  more  particularly  of  those  who  had  been 
awakened  to  enquiry  respecting  the  principles  and 
doctrines  of  our  Society,  and  among  whom  she  had  so 
earnestly  and  so  faithfully  laboured. 

Whilst  in  Glamorganshire,  she  was  obhged  for  a  time 
partially  to  suspend  her  labours,  in  consequence  of  ill- 
ness induced  by  much  exhaustion,  both  of  mind  and 
body.  During  this  interval,  she  was  most  tenderly  and 
hospitably  cared  for,  at  the  house  of  her  kind  friend 
Rebecca  Gibbins.  Yet,  whilst  indisposition  oppressed 
her  frame,  she  would  often  appoint  and  hold  meetings, 
when  according  to  all  appearance  she  was  wholly  unfit 
for  the  exertion. 

In  the  latter  part  of  her  visit  to  Wales,  she  Avas 

s  2 


260 


1843. 


[j'.T.  56. 


joined  by  her  valued  friend  Junia  Price,  and  they  were 
favoured  to  labour  together,  with  true  sisterly  harmony, 
and  much  unity  of  feeling.  At  Carmarthen  a  new  and 
somewhat  peculiar  service  lay  before  them.  Junia 
Price  believed  that  it  was  required  of  her  to  propose  to 
have  a  meeting  with  the  magistrates,  and  the  ministers 
of  the  Church  of  England,  and  other  Christian  deno- 
minations,— a  service  in  which  her  companion  was  fully 
prepared  to  co-operate. 

On  enquiry  it  appeared  that  the  usual  meeting  of  the 
magistrates  was  to  take  place  on  that  day,  and  that 
very  important  matters  were  coming  before  them, 
in  consequence  of  a  formidable  gathering  of  the 
"  Rebekah"  rioters,  in  the  immediate  neighbourhood. 
Application  was  made  to  the  magistrates  assembled 
in  the  Court  House,  who  kindly  consented  to  receive 
the  proposed  visit ;  and  it  is  believed  that  the  service 
was  both  well-timed  and  acceptable.  Junia  Price,  in 
her  address,  dwelt  upon  the  importance  of  carrying  out 
consistently  the  peaceable  principles  of  the  gospel,  and 
upon  the  unlawfulness  of  taking  away  human  life  ;  and 
H.  C.  Backhouse  earnestly  exhorted  her  hearers  to  lay 
aside  the  doctrine  of  expediency,  and  to  adhere  faith- 
fully to  the  precepts  of  the  gospel,  endeavouring  to  fulfil 
the  whole  law  of  Christ,  in  the  public  not  less  than  in 
the  private  duties  of  hfe.  She  expressed  her  belief  that 
the  principles  of  Christianity  were  increasingly  preva- 
lent, and  more  and  more  regarded  by  the  inhabitants 
of  this  country — from  the  Queen  upon  her  throne  to 
the  lowest  of  her  subjects, — as  the  grand  remedy  for 
social  and  moral  evil ;  bringing  forcibly  into  view  the 
effect  which  would  be  produced  upon  the  mass  of  the 
community,  both  in  repressing  crime  and  in  promoting 
the  cause  of  religion  and  virtue,  if  the  nobles,  the 
magistrates,  and  the  ministers  of  religion,  were  with 


-liT.  56.]  1843.  261 

consistency  of  life  and  conduct  to  take  the  lead  in  the 
work  of  reformation. 

2nd  of  9th  mo. — Rode  to  Milford  Haven;  the  Inn  in  a 
bustle,  from  the  arrival  of  the  rescued  crew  and  passengers 
of  a  steamboat  that  had  just  gone  down  at  the  mouth  of  the 
harbour. 

4th. — Visited  the  few  families  of  Friends  with  Junia  Price, 
and  then  made  calls  on  the  widow  La  Touche  and  her 
daughters,  and  on  some  others,  who  had  been  saved  from 
a  watery  grave.  They  were  grateful  for  our  visit,  which  was 
of  a  most  interesting  character. 

7th. — Called  on  the  President  of  the  College  at  Lampeter: 
and,  on  the  road  to  Llandilo,  on  Job  Thomas's*  widow,  aged 
94 — a  very  interesting  visit — saw  her  son,  and  a  nice  grand- 
child who  takes  care  of  her.  Truly  the  savour  of  his  spirit 
seemed  to  remain  among  them — the  blessing  to  the  third  and 
fourth  generation  of  those  that  feared  the  name  of  the  Lord. 

The  visit  to  South  Wales  being  completed,  H.  C. 
Backhouse  and  Junia  Price  went  into  Staffordshire. 
There  they  held  several  meetings,  chiefly  in  the 
Potteries,  and  also  visited  the  families  of  Friends  at 
Stoke ; — Edward  Pease  accompanying  them  in  this 
engagement. 

2nd  of  10th  mo. — Reached  Darlington  just  in  time  for  the 
Select  Quarterly  Meeting.  Pleasant  to  be  with  my  friends 
in  a  sense  of  "  the  unity  of  the  Spirit  in  the  bond  of  peace." 

In  the  course  of  the  journey  just  described,  she 
addressed  the  following  letter  to  her  friend  E.  0. 


*  See  a  tiuct,  with  yonie  account  of  his  triumphant  close  ;  Friends' 
Series. 


262 


1843. 


[.CT.  5G. 


Ti  egelles,  when  about  to  embark  on  a  religious  visit  to 
the  West  Indies  : — 

22nd  of  9th  mo.,  1843. 

My  dear  Friend, 

I  must  send  tliee  a  salutation  of  love  before 
thou  leavest  our  shores.  I  know  something  of  the  very 
mingled  sensations  that  are  the  portion  of  those  who  leave 
everything  they  hold  dearest  on  earth,  to  follow  their  Lord 
in  the  obedience  of  faith ;  the  sweetness  of  the  enjoyment  of 
His  presence,  even  when  we  are  undergoing  trials  heart- 
rending to  nature. 

I  believe  thou  wilt  be  favoured  with  the  sense  of  its  being 
full  time  to  go,  that  peace  will  go  with  thee,  and  that,  in 
taking  leave  of  thy  beloved  wife  and  children,  and  sisters, 
thou  wilt  be  able  to  commend  them  to  the  care  and  keeping 
of  the  Shepherd  of  Israel,  and  feel  as  if  thou  couldst  now  do  no 
more  for  them.  I  do  crave  thy  preservation  and  prosperity. 
Thou  wilt  probably  be  much  enlarged  in  thy  gift,  and  preach 
with  more  authority  than  thou  hast  ever  known  before ;  thy 
heart  too  will  in  all  probability  be  greatly  expanded  in  love, 
and  find  at  times  that  this  love  is  as  an  ocean  to  swim  in. 
I  know  also  thou  wilt  have  thy  deep  baptisms,  thy  heart 
enlarged  to  suffer  as  well  as  to  enjoy.  O,  mayst  thou  be  pre- 
served both  in  heights  and  depths  !  "  Keep  thy  heart  with 
all  diligence."  Be  not  allured  by  pleasant  things  or  pleasant 
people  ;  seek  only  to  fulfil  thy  calling  and  return  unspotted 
from  the  world.  Then  indeed,  I  believe  it  will  be  in  a  peace 
that  passeth  understanding,  again  to  resume  thy  place  among 
thy  family  and  friends,  and  with  renewed  vigour  to  fulfil  and 
enjoy  all  the  relationships  of  life. 

I  feel  deeply  interested  for  thee,  and,  in  a  degree  of  maternal 
solicitude  which  my  age  may  now  warrant,  the  foregoing  ob- 
servations are  suggested.  I  should  like  my  love  to  thy  dear 
wife,  whose  kindness  to  us  was  very  cordial  and  cheei'ing.  I 
can  quite  enter  into  her  feelings  in  parting  with  thee,  and 
believe  that  she  too  will  experience  that  peace  and  consolation 
which  will  bring  to  her  mind  the  promise  to  Israel,  "  I  will 


.i:r.  56.] 


1843. 


263 


keep  thee  as  the  apple  of  mine  eye."  My  love  also  to  thy 
dear  children,  and  thy  sisters.    *    *    *  * 

Thy  affectionate  friend, 

H.  C.  Backhouse, 

During  her  stay  at  Darlington,  though  in  poor  health, 
she  paid  visits  to  the  workpeople  of  the  "  Black  Boy 
Colliery,"  and  to  the  schools  which  her  husband  had 
established,  and  attended  to  various  other  duties  as 
they  were  presented  to  her  mind  ;  but  she  was  evidently 
unequal  to  a  large  amount  of  exertion,  and  on  her  arrival 
at  Norwich  she  placed  herself  under  the  care  of  a  physi- 
cian, who  ascertained  that  she  had  serious  symptoms  of 
organic  disease.    On  this  she  remarks  : — 

I  surely  think  my  state  of  health  very  serious.  May  I 
repose  solely  on  the  wisdom  and  mercy  of  Him  who  gave  me 
a  being,  and  who  can  prolong  or  cut  it  short  at  his  pleasure  ! 
I  feel  the  uncertainty  of  all  things  future. 

Yet  while  she  took  this  grave  view  of  her  own  case, 
her  conviction  was  strong  that  she  must,  in  the  obe- 
dience of  faith,  pursue  what  she  apprehended  was  called 
for  at  her  hands.  The  close  of  this  year,  and  the 
commencement  of  the  next,  she  spent  with  her  son  and 
daughter  Hodgkin,  at  Tottenham,  where,  after  all  the 
conflicts  and  afilictions  through  which  she  had  passed, 
she  was  able  to  realize  the  healthy  spring  of  natural  joy 
in  the  birth  of  her  first  grandchild  ;  an  event  which 
threw  a  glow  of  thankfulness  over  her  mental  horizon, 
of  which  her  memoranda  contain  several  indications. 

27th  of\2th  mo. — I  was  present  at  the  birth  of  the  child 
— called  after  my  dear  husband.     The  day  afterwards  was 


264. 


1844. 


[.V.T.  57. 


spent  in  some  anxiety ;  but  towards  evening  we  could  feel 
something  of  rejoicing  at  an  event  vvliicli  I  have  long  antici- 
pated with  pleasure. 

6th  of  1st  mo.,  1844. — I  attended  the  funeral  of  dear 
William  Allen — it  was  a  day  of  the  deepest  refreshment ;  as 
we  gathered  round  his  coffin  a  heavenly  calm  was  spread 
over  us. 

13th. — The  evening  was  spent  pleasantly  in  a  little  of  my 
Father's  peace. 

I5th. — Prostrated  before  my  Lord,  to  know  the  way  I 
should  take ;  which  in  mercy  opened  clearly  before  me. 
I  took  a  sweet  farewell  of  my  children  and  the  family, 
and,  with  my  dear  Edmund,  and  my  servant  Fanny,  I  went 
to  Ipswich.  ^  *  *  1  liad  a  most  peaceful  ride,  not  the 
shadow  of  a  doubt  about  being  in  my  right  place ;  and  a 
pleasant  welcome  and  evening  we  had. 

From  a  belief  that  the  time  was  come  for  leaving 
Norwich  as  a  residence,  (the  particular  object  for 
which  she  had  gone  there  being  accomplished,)  she 
now  returned  to  her  dwelling  at  Darlington,  which  con- 
tinued to  be  her  home  for  the  remainder  of  her  life. 

6th  of  2nd  mo.,  1844. — A  pleasant  ride  with  dear  Jane, 
Edmund,  and  J.  Hodgkin,  to  Stockton  Monthly  Meeting 
— a  meeting  indeed  to  be  thankful  for.  I  felt  throughout 
the  whole  of  it  peaceful  and  quiet,  and  on  laying  my  concern 
for  Bristol,  &c.,  before  my  friends,  met  with  a  support, 
unity,  and  sympathy  from  them  which  dispersed  all  my 
doubts  and  fears.  Truly  it  was  a  time  to  be  remembered  with 
gratitude  of  heart  to  the  Father  of  mercies  ! 

19th  of  3rd  mo. — Took  leave  of  my  dear  children  at  Totten- 
ham, and  came  with  George  Stacey  to  Bristol.  As  I  entered 
Daniel  and  Sarah  Wheeler's  house,  I  felt  ray  separation  from 
all  my  friends  and  the  prospect  of  so  much  labour,  but  I  was 
in  mercy  clear  of  all  doubts. 

22nd. — Laid  before  Friends,  after  the  week-day  meeting, 
my  concern  to  visit  families,  which  was  comfortably  united 
with ;  but  the  judgment  was  unanimous  that  I  should  go 


57.] 


1844. 


265 


alone.  I  felt  my  strippedness  as  compared  with  former  times, 
but  I  both  saw  aud  felt  it  might  now  be  best. 

Very  diligently  was  she  engaged  in  going  from  house 
to  house  among  the  members  of  that  large  meeting, 
attending  also  meetings  for  worship  as  they  came  in 
course. 


2^th. — A  highly  favoured  day.  Some  truly  harmonious 
ministry.  A  nice  call  on  Samuel  Capper's  son,  probably  not 
far  from  his  end,  and  a  peaceful  return  home.  In  mercy  it 
was  given  me  to  hold  an  excellent  meeting  in  the  Methodist 
Meeting-house.  Truly  it  was  a  day  of  favour  to  be  gratefully 
remembered. 

Sidcot,  \st  of  5th  mo. — Discouraged  yesterday  from  having 
a  public  meeting  here  this  evening,  and  with  Friends  to- 
morrow, by  the  inconvenience  to  them ;  this  was  yester- 
day's trial ;  and  I  at  last  yielded  to  visits  being  appointed 
for  Fifth-day  in  Bristol,  at  the  persuasion  of  others,  not 
sufficiently  with  my  own  mind ;  which  has  brought  a  burden 
upon  me.  Oh  !  the  reasonings  of  the  creature ;  what  con- 
fusion they  lead  into  !  Had  in  mercy  a  pretty  good  night, 
but  regrets  assail  me.  Lord  !  pity  and  forgive,  and  give  me 
more  patience  to  do  all  thy  will. 

2nd. — The  whole  of  this  day  confirming  my  belief  that  I 
ought  to  have  stayed  at  Sidcot ;  and  on  really  looking  over 
my  work,  found  nothing  would  have  been  more  reasonable  than 
to  have  done  so.  So  it  is ;  faith  always  leads  into  the  things 
most  reasonable,  but  which  the  ignorance  of  the  understand- 
ing conceals  for  a  time  from  the  mind. 

6th. — May  the  Preserver  of  men  grant  us  clear-sighted- 
ness !    I  trust  He  will. 


After  the  Yearly  Meeting  she  proceeded  with  her 
religious  engagement  in  the  West  of  England,  accompa- 


266  1844.  [.ET.  57. 

niecl  by  her  friend,  Eliza  H.  Hunt.  Writing  in  the 
Ninth  Month,  respecting  this  period,  she  says  : — 

Now  I  think  I  can  hardly  follow  in  detail  a  very  interesting 
three  months  of  my  life,  in  which  I  felt  most  closely  united, 
I  believe,  in  true  gospel  fellowship  to  my  very  sweet  and 
interesting  companion,  E.  H.  Hunt.  We  were  at  the  Quarterly 
]\Ieetings  of  Bristol  and  Somersetshire,  at  Bridgewater ;  of 
Devon  and  of  Cornwall :  had  deeply  interesting  rides  and 
conversations,  and  readings  of  the  Bible  ;  they  were  months, 
I  believe,  of  much  instruction,  often  of  great  enjoyment,  but 
also  of  considerable  suffering.  All  the  meetings  in  Somer- 
setshire, Gloucestershire  and  Wiltshire,  were  visited,  and 
most  of  the  families,  and  several  public  meetings  held. 

In  the  foregoing  extract  Ave  have  a  sketch,  from  her 
own  pen,  of  the  earlier  stages  of  a  friendship,  which, 
in  its  close  intimacy,  was  permitted  through  the  good 
providence  of  her  God,  to  cheer  the  later  years  of  her 
life,  and  to  shed  over  them  some  fresh  rays,  both  of 
social  and  spiritual  joy. 

In  the  Sixth  Month,  her  brother-in-law,  William 
Backliouse,  (who  had  a  certificate  from  his  Monthly 
Meeting,  for  religious  service  in  Norway,  and  was  about 
to  embark  for  that  country,  accompanied  by  one  of  his 
nephews  ;)  attended  his  meeting  apparently  in  usual 
health,  when  on  rising — as  was  supposed,  to  address 
the  assembly — he  suddenly  fell  down  and  expired.  It 
is  a  remarkable  fact  that  the  vessel  in  which  their 
berths  were  taken,  was  lost  and  all  on  board  perished. 
In  relation  to  this  event,  she  writes  in  her  journal  : — 

The  day  of  the  funeral  was  a  deeply  interesting  one,  in  the 
service  of  which  I  had  much  part  to  take.  There  seemed 
but  one  heart  iu  the  matter.    Esteem  for  the  deceased  was 


-KT.  57.]  1844.  2(57 

very  manifest  by  the  state  of  the  town — all  shops  shut,  and 
the  meeting-house  filled. 

loth  of  10th  mo. — Dear  Jane  married  [to  Robert  Barclay 
Fox,  of  Falmouth] .  Fervent  were  my  desires  that  the  day 
might  be  passed  under  the  shadow  of  that  wing,  under 
which  there  is  power,  truth,  simplicity  and  love — and  so  I 
think  it  was. 

llih  of  11th  mo. — The  dear  Hodgkins  left  us.  Ann  came 
sweetly  to  my  bed,  early  in  the  morning.  I  endeavoured 
to  ascertain  the  state  of  her  mind  regarding  her  own  health. 
She  said  that  she  thought  she  had  nothing  to  do  but  to  abide 
in  the  present  moment ;  she  rather  thought  she  might  be 
better,  but  that  she  should  not  be  surprised  at  being  at  any 
time  worse  :  her  spirit  did  seem  sweet  indeed,  and  it  was  most 
endearing  to  be  so  near  her.  I  accompanied  them  and  their 
dear  precious  child  to  the  station,  and  saw  them  off  with  a 
heart  full  of  tenderness  and  love,  and  I  trust  gratitude  for 
such  treasures,  precarious  as  I  felt  the  tenure  on  which  I 
must  hold  them.  *  *  *  I  have  since  had  with  my  son, 
and  also  when  left  to  myself,  hours  of  great  rest  and  peace — 
feeling  this  allotment  to  be  in  the  Divine  appointment.  I 
have  been  reminded  of  days  and  hours  before  I  married, 
when  the  Bridegroom  of  souls  was  so  sweetly  taking  me  to 
Himself ;  and  now  when  life  is  so  far  past,  I  feel  that  He  is 
drawing  near,  I  trust,  to  be  my  comforter  to  the  end  of  my 
pilgrimage.  Under  this  feeling  I  have  revived  in  health, 
and  been  engaged  about  schools ;  again  reminding  me  of  the 
employment  of  my  youth,  and  of  the  turning  round  of  the 
wheel.  All  honour  and  glory  and  praise  be  to  Him,  who 
hath  washed  us  from  our  sins,  in  his  own  blood,  and  made 
us  Kings  and  Priests  unto  our  God,  as  we  may  most  humbly 
and  reverently  trust ! 

In  the  Eleventh  IVIonth  of  this  year,  H.  C.  Backhouse 
was  hbcrated  by  her  Monthly  JMeeting  for  religious 
service  at  Kendal,  and  in  the  neighbourhood,  on  which 


268  1845.  [.liT.  58. 

journey  she  had  the  counsel  and  fatherly  help  of  her 
friend  and  relative  Edward  Pease. 

In  reference  to  a  meeting  held  there  in  the  course 
of  this  engagement,  she  says  : — 

I  was  favoured  with  a  large  relieving  public  meeting  in  the 
evening.  A  tide  of  heavenly  love  and  peace  did  after  it  flow 
in  my  heart,  to  its  great  comfort,  encouragement,  and  refresh- 
ment. 

She  afterwards  attended  the  Quarterly  Meetings  at 
York  and  Kendal.  After  reaching  the  latter  place  she 
remarks — 

I  felt  on  arriving,  and  in  the  select  meeting,  as  if  I  was 
under  Divine  approval, — a  little  of  the  peace  of  my  God 
being  given  unto  me.  So  ended  the  first  day  of  the  year 
1845.  May  the  Lord,  whom  I  desire  to  serve,  create  in  me  a 
clean  heart,  so  that  I  may  readily  learn  his  good  and  accept- 
able and  perfect  will,  and  be  able  to  use  such  language  as  this  : 
"  I  dehght  to  do  thy  will,  O  God." 


To  Thomas  "Wistak. 

Darlington,  16th  of  lat  mo.,  1845. 

My  much  loved  and  honotjeed  Friend, 

I  have  heard  this  day  of  the  decease  of  the 
beloved  and  precious  partner  of  thy  life.  I  heard  also  that 
thou  wast  wonderfully  supported  and  calm ;  that  I  could 
believe,  because  I  could,  I  thought,  feel  that  the  arms  of 
everlasting  love  and  mercy  were  round  about  you  both, — 
the  one  in  heaven  and  the  other  on  earth — and  would  be  so 
till,  in  the  perfect  judgment  of  your  Lord,  the  time  shall 
come  for  you  to  worship  before  Him  together  in  glory.  I 
dehghted  in  your  union  on  earth ;  1  feel  it  jonly  increased  by 
the  one  being  in  heaven,  the  other  awaiting  that  day  wheu 


.i-,T.  58.] 


1845. 


2G9 


the  fulness  of  it  shall  be  sealed  for  ever.  I  think  I  can 
almost  feel  myself  among  you.  I  remember  to  have  seen 
my  own  dear  Father  smile  when  collected  with  his  family 
after  one  of  their  closest  trials, — a  smile  which  gave  a  sense 
of  knowing  a  joy  beyond  the  confines  of  the  grave,  and 
which  the  grave  could  not  touch.  Such  smiles,  I  believe, 
thy  family  have  beheld  on  thy  countenance  in  the  midst  of 
tears.  I  love  to  think  of  your  family  circle,  dear  Elizabeth 
especially,  who  will  partake  most  fully  both  in  the  sorrows 
and  also  I  believe  in  the  consolations  that  abound  under  the 
present  affliction,  "  Numbered  with  the  just  of  all  gene- 
rations." Surely  this  is  the  prevailing  thought,  but  the  loss 
of  such  an  one  on  earth  is  great.  It  came  home  to  me  as 
that  of  a  near  relation. 

I  do  feel  it  a  mercy  that  her  life  was  so  long  preserved,  and 
the  descent  altogether  so  gradual.  She  will  long  live  in  the 
remembrance  of  those  who  had  the  privilege  of  her  friend- 
ship and  acquaintance,  and  the  very  recollection  of  her 
virtues  is  a  stimulus  to  well-doing.  Yet  with  all  the  conso- 
lations that  Christian  feeling  and  knowledge  can  give,  united 
with  the  tenderest  attentions  of  thy  beloved  family,  I  know 
thou  art  deeply  to  be  felt  for  in  thy  solitude.  May  He, 
in  whose  presence  is  fulness  of  joy,  lift  up  the  light  of  his 
countenance  upon  thee  and  bless  thee ;  and  conduct  thee  so 
gently  towards  thy  eternal  rest,  that  thou  mayst  continually 
adopt  the  language  so  frequently  made  use  of  by  the  Psalmist, 
"  His  mercy  endureth  for  ever." 

With  my  very  affectionate  remembrance  to  thy  family 
circle —children  and  grandchildren — to  dear  Elizabeth 
especially, 

I  am  thy  truly  attached  friend, 

H.  C.  Backhouse. 

In  the  course  of  this  month  she  obtained  a  minute  to 
attend  the  Quarterly  Meeting  for  Warwick,  Leicester 
and  Rutland  ;  and  to  hold  meetings  in  Cornwall. 

2^th  of  \st  mo.,  1845. — I  was  cheered  in  the  evening,  by 
attending  the  select  meeting  at  Coventry,  where,  as  a  con- 


270  1845.  [.KT.  58. 

firraation  of  my  faith,  I  spoke  beforehand  on  a  subject  that 
afterwards  came  before  the  meeting. 

29th. — Attended  the  Quarterly  Meeting  to  my  own  com- 
fort, and  I  believe  to  that  of  many  others.  I  felt  at  liberty 
to  proceed  afterwards  to  Bristol. 

In  Cornwall,  she  held  a  few  public  meetings,  and  was 
also  at  some  of  the  meetings  held  in  course  for  worship 
and  discipline,  and  visited  a  few  families.  At  the  close 
of  this  engagement  she  beheved  it  right  to  endeavour 
to  see  the  prisoner  "  Tawell,"  then  awaiting  his  trial  on 
the  charge  of  murder,  for  which  he  was  afterwards  exe- 
cuted. She  accordingly  went  up  (attended  by  her  son 
John  Hodgkin),  to  Aylesbury,  where  the  Assizes  were 
being  held.  On  reaching  the  town,  they  found  that  the 
verdict  of  guilty  had  just  been  pronounced.  The  visit 
which  ensued,  is  described  in  the  following  letter  : — 

To  E.  H.  Hunt. 

Polam,  leth  of  Srd  mo.,  184.5. 
*  *  -x-  *  The  leave  of  a  visiting  magis- 
trate was  necessary,  and  the  nearest  was  three  miles  off. 
To  him  a  letter  was  sent,  and  the  answer  came  late  at 
night ; — that  we  had  his  best  wishes  and  approbation ;  and 
that  he  would  call  at  nine  o'clock,  the  next  morning. 

During  our  Scripture  reading  in  the  morning,  the  magistrate 
to  whom  we  had  w  ritten  was  announced ;  his  manner  was  kind 
and  intelligent,  and  the  tears  flowed  down  his  cheeks  whilst 
he  conversed  with  us  on  the  affecting  occasion  on  which  we 
■were  met.  He  proceeded  to  the  gaol  to  make  way  for  us : 
my  soul  I  trust  was  humbled  and  tendered  before  the 
Lord.  The  gaoler  came  to  us,  saying,  that  Tawell  was  in 
bed,  and  in  such  a  state,  that  he  hardly  knew  if  he  Avere 
sensible.  The  gaoler  Avished  him  to  get  up  and  take 
breakfast  before  Ave  saAv  him,  but  asked  my  son  to  go 
in  first  and  speak  to  him.    J.  H.  presently  returned,  and 


.KT.  58.] 


1845. 


271 


wished  me  to  follow  him.  It  was  an  awful  moment.  I 
entered  the  cell^  in  which  there  was  just  room  for  the  bed 
and  a  chair  ;  no  hght  but  from  the  door.  The  sound  of  his 
groaning  I  cannot  describe.  I  went  up  to  him,  and  laying 
my  hand  on  his,  I  said,  "  John  Tawell,"  in  an  accent  which  I 
believe  touched  him,  and  he  began  to  sob  :  after  some  little 
time,  in  a  low  voice  he  said,  "  Pray  for  me which  I  was 
soon,  I  believe,  enabled  to  do,  standing  by  the  bed.  I  felt 
my  own  mind  relieved  by  it,  and  an  awful  pause  ensued. 
He  was  evidently  calmed.  I  was  very  plain  in  what  I  said, 
entreating  him  to  endure  the  furnace,  and  craving  that 
there  might  be  no  superficial  work ;  but  that  he  might  be 
brought  to  look  upon  the  Lamb  of  God,  who  takcth  away 
the  sins  of  the  world.  After  a  considerable  pause  my  son 
followed  with  very  close  and  good  advice.  He  asked  if  it 
was  a  question  of  days  or  hours  :  I  told  him  I  did  not  know, 
and  besought  him  not  to  think  about  that,  but  to  attend  to 
his  own  business.    *    *    *  * 

After  attending  the  Yearly  Meetings  of  Dublin  and 
London,  H.  C.  Backhouse  devoted  a  portion  of  the 
Summer  and  Autumn  to  rehgious  labour,  in  two  or  three 
successive  journeys  in  the  Western  Counties,  more 
especially  Cornwall,  to  complete  the  work  which  she 
had  before  left  unfinished ;  and  in  a  considerable  part 
of  this  engagement  she  was  again  accompanied  by  her 
beloved  friend  E.  H.  Hunt,  whilst  other  parts  of  the 
service  were  performed  alone,  and  often  under  deep 
conflict  of  mind.  Of  a  public  meeting  at  Marazion, 
held  whilst  they  were  together,  she  writes  : — 

In  it  we  had  the  comfort  of  harmonious  ministry,  with,  I 
believe,  a  portion  of  the  demonstration  of  the  Spirit,  and 
with  power. 

Of  another  meeting  she  remarks  : — 


The  meeting  at  Newlyn  the  most  spiiitual  and  refresh 


272  1845.  [.ET.  58. 

ing  I  think  we  hfive  had  ;  the  blessings  of  the  poor  were 
given  to  me  after  it. 

Still,  notwithstanding  the  manifest  acceptance  of  her 
service  by  the  churches  which  she  visited,  and,  we  may 
reverently  add,  the  owning  of  it  by  her  Lord,  this 
narrative  would  be  unfaithful  if  it  did  not  exhibit  her  as 
at  times  unprofitably  discouraged  in  the  apprehension 
that  she  had  failed  in  the  full  performance  of  all  that 
had  been  required  of  her.  And  when  this  apprehen- 
sion was  once  present  to  her  mind,  there  was  no  bodily 
fatigue  and  exposure,  no  amount  of  "  back-work,"  (as 
she  used  often  expressively  to  term  it),  which  she 
would  not  willingly  encounter,  rather  than  leave  her 
labour  of  love  incomplete. 

In  one  of  the  intervals  of  her  Western  engagement  she 
attended  her  own  Quarterly  Meeting  at  Newcastle,  of 
which  she  writes  in  her  journal  : — 

7t]i  of  lOth  mo. — The  Quarterly  Meeting— a  solid  meeting 
for  worship  :  after  it  John  Pease  returned  his  certificate 
for  visiting  America,  a  good  and  interesting  time.  I  said  a 
few  words,  welcoming  him  home,  and  expressive  of  satisfaction 
that  the  glory  was  given  to  Him  to  whom  it  was  due. 

Towards  the  close  of  this  engagement  she  went  for  a 
few  days  to  Tottenham,  to  pay  a  short  visit  to  her  beloved 
daughter  Hodgkin,  whose  health  was  sufficientl}^  inter- 
rupted to  excite  her  maternal  anxiety,  though  no  imme- 
diate danger  was  apprehended  by  herself  or  her  medical 
attendants.  The  subsequent  event  rendered  this  little 
interval  peculiarly  precious  in  the  retrospect.  In  refer- 
ring to  it  afterwards,  she  writes  : — 

While  sitting  by  my  dear  Ann  in  the  evening,  in  her 


.K,T.  oS.] 


1845. 


278 


room,  I  said  if  I  could  be  permitted  to  enjoy  such  peace 
as  I  then  did,  and  stay  with  her,  it  was  all  I  could  desire. 
Dear  lamb  !  It  was  my  last  time  of  intelligent  communica- 
tion with  her  on  earth.  It  seemed  the  foretaste  of  heaven, 
and  is  now  among  my  sweetest  recollections. 

H.  C.  Backhouse  then  returned  to  the  West,  in  com- 
pany with  her  valued  friend  Susanna  Corder,  to  attend 
a  few  meetings  which  yet  remained  unvisited.  Whilst 
at  Bristol  she  was  summoned  to  Tottenham,  in  conse- 
quence of  her  daughter's  increased  illness,  which 
speedily  terminated  in  death. 

Almost  all  words  seem  inadequate  at  such  a  time — so  I  felt 
it ;  but  the  solemn  stillness  did  proclaim,  "  Weep  not  for 
me."  After  a  time  we  went  to  bed,  but  not  without  my 
beholding  the  remains,  and  the  sweet  expression  of  her  solid, 
sensible,  and  affectionate  countenance — a  glow  of  heaven 
upon  it.  Some  Httle  sleep  I  got,  but  my  body  and  my  soul 
were  bruised,  and  too  sore  for  much.* 

*  We  here  subjoin  a  few  memoranda  and  extracts  of  letters  of  Ann 
Hodgkin^  descriptive  of  some  of  her  religious  experience  : — 

I  have  no  remembrance  of  any  deep  religious  feeling  till  about 
the  age  of  seven  :  when  I  began  to  feel  what  I  know  not  how  to 
describe  but  as  a  sense  of  need  ;  it  was  so  strong  as  to  induce  me  to 
ask  my  governess,  after  retiring  to  rest,  to  "  teach  me  to  pray."  She 
put  off  my  request,  I  hardly  know  how  ;  but  the  following  evening, 
under  the  same  strong  feeling,  I  repeated  it ;  and  her  reply  was,  in 
effect,  that  she  could  not  teach  me,  that  I  must  apply  to  my  Heavenly 
Father.  Then  did  my  heart  turn  towards  Him  with  the  fervent 
petition,  "  Lord,  teach  me  to  pray."  With  equal,  I  think  increasing, 
earnestness,  the  same  prayer  was  ofiered,  after  laying  my  head  on  the 
pillow  on  the  two  following  evenings  ;  when  I  was  graciously  answered, 
and  the  prayer  put  into  my  heart  that  I  might  be  forgiven  my  sins  for 
the  sake  of  Jesus  Christ,  cleansed  through  the  operation  of  the  Holy 


271 


18iG. 


Darlim/fon,  I  fi///  of  ]«/  mo.  1810. — My  son  Ilodgkiii  camciu 
the  evening,  and  was  nmcli  affected.  Dear  Ann  !  the  nearer  I 
can  keep  her  image  before  nie,  and  the  wisdom  and  sweetness 

Spuit.  I  now  forget  the  ju'ecise  wovdti ;  but  I  do  not  forget  the  power 
that  accompauied  them,  imr  the  distinctness  of  the  sense  tliat  it  was 
for  the  sake  of  Ilini  who  loved  ns,  and  gave  Himself  for  us,  and  through 
the  operation  of  the  Holy  Spirit,  that  we  are  justified  and  sanctified. 
Almost  with  the  prayer  the  answer  seemed  to  come,  filling  my  heart 
with  gratitude  and  love.  Then,  in  perfect  trustfulness,  I  seemed  able 
to  rest  on  the  bosom  of  Jesus,  so  that  I  can  only  look  back  upon  this 
season  as  one  of  perfect  peace. 

Whether  at  that  period  there  was  any  apparent  change  in  my  conduct  I 
am  unable  to  say,  so  slight  is  my  recollection  of  the  thoughts  and  actions 
of  those  days  :  but  well  I  remember  their  evenings — with  what  peaceful 
feelings  I  laid  my  head  upon  my  pillow,  and  how  the  spirit  of  supplica- 
tion was  again  and  again  vouchsafed.  The  evening  following  the  one  of 
sweetest  visitation  (before  noted)  was  in  an  especial  manner  a  time  of 
renewed  favour  ;  and  an  enlarged  capacity  was  given  to  supplicate,  not 
only  for  myself,  but  for  my  father,  mother,  sister  and  brothers,  and  (I 
think,  but  am  not  clear  about  it)  for  the  whole  human  family,  for  whom 
desires  were  about  this  time  raised  in  my  infant  heart,  that  all  might 
come  and  taste  the  exceeding  goodness  of  our  Lord  and  Saviour. 

Another  occasion  has  left  a  strong  impression  upon  my  mind, 
whether  it  was  after  or  before  this  time  I  cannot  tell,  when  my  heart 
overflowed  with  gratitude  and  praise  in  the  remembrance  of  those 
lines — 

"  Whene'er  I  take  my  walks  abroad. 
How  many  poor  I  see  ; 
What  shall  I  render  to  my  God, 
For  all  his  gifts  to  me  ?" 

1842.  —  As  I  hinted  at  the  clouds  that  hung  over  me,  I  must  tell  thee 
that  I  am  again  permitted  to  enjoy  a  sweet  portion  of  peace.  Oh  ! 
how  sweet  is  "  the  least  glance  of  the  Father's  eye  :"  a  token  that  wc 
are  not  forsaken,  that  a  Saviour  is  nigh  ! 

The  conviction  deepens  that  peace  and  joy  are  not  the  fruits  of 
Nature's  barren  soil ;  that,  apart  from  Christ,  all  we  can  know,  even 
amidst  the  choicest  things  of  earth,  is  vanity  and  toil.  Thus  is  the 
call  to  follow  Him,  to  give  up  all  to  Him,  again  and  again  extended. 
Pray  for  me  that  I  may  be  willing  and  obedient,  that  nothing  may 
hinder  my  being  wholly  His. 

1843.  — I  feel  this  rnther  peculiarly  a  time  in  which  I  am  called  u]jou 
to  see  that  I  am  ready  for  the  midnight  cry,   "  Behold  the  bridegroom 


-ET.  59.] 


1840. 


275 


of  her  spirit,  the  more  grateful  to  me.  I  was  glad  to  have 
him  with  us,  and  felt  more  peaceful  this  evening,  than  has 
often  been  the  case  of  late. 

cometh,  go  ye  out  to  meet  Him  ;"  to  ask  of  Him  wlio  giveth  freely  the 
white  robe,  the  weddiug  garment.  Oh !  for  a  heart  thoroughly 
cleanseil,  ouly  delighting  in  the  will  of  its  Lord  !  loving  Him  above  all ! 

lltk  mo.  1843. —  Quite  free  from  pain  through  almost  all  the  night, 
during  a  part  of  which  I  lay  awake,  enjoying  more  than  is  often  the 
case  with  me,  the  sense  of  the  love  of  my  Heavenly  Father.  It  is  not 
for  us  to  sa_y  we  lack  anything,  is  it,  dearest  1  or  that  we  do  so,  if  only 
we  may  be  preserved  unto  the  day  of  Christ,  and  may  see  our  dear 
children  walking  in  the  truth. 

3rd  mo.  1844. — Whilst  enjoying  the  degree  of  restoration  permitted, 
I  desire  not  to  lose  sight  of  what  the  last  few  weeks  have  brought  pecu- 
liarly home  to  me — that  life,  that  my  life,  hangs  upon  a  thread,  and  with 
it,  may  there  still  be  granted  me  a  sustaining  sense  of  the  love  of  my 
Saviour ! 

3rd  mo.  1846. — The  meeting  was  one  in  which  I  renewedly  felt  the 
value  of  silent  worship  ;  and,  whatever  the  experience  of  others,  how 
impossible  (is  it  too  much  to  say  1)  it  was  for  me  to  grow  without  it. 

8th  mo. — There  is  nothing  like  the  path  of  fiiith  for  eventual  comfort, 
though  it  often  costs  thee  much,  I  well  know  ;  and  my  heart  desires 
that  a  gracious  God  may  uphold  thee  in  thy  exercises,  and  me  in  my 
weakness,  and  that,  whatever  He  may  see  meet  to  dispense  to  us  here, 
we  may  know  Him  to  be  our  everlasting  portion. 

The  following  were  among  her  expressions  the  day  before  her 
decease  : — 

"  I  hope  you  will  not  be  too  much  tried  if  my  life  should  be  taken  at 
this  time.  Thou  knowest  I  am  not  one  of  those  given  to  much  expres- 
sion, but  I  have  a  feeling  of  these  things,  perhaps  not  a  sufficient  sense 
of  their  deep  importance.  I  think,  however,  we  have  reason  to  believe 
that  He  in  whom  we  have  trusted  will  care  for  us,  and  for  our 
dear  children.  *  *  *  *  I  don't  wi.-h  to  be  presumptuous,  but  I 
think  it  will  be  a  comfort  to  you  to  know  that  I  liave  a  humble  hope 
that  my  sins  are  forgiven  nie,  for  Jesus'  sake  ;  and  for  this  His 
unmerited  mercy  and  grace  I  now  desire  to  render  thanksgiving  and 
praise  to  my  God  and  Saviour.  *  *  *  *  Through  the  mercy  of 
God,  the  sting  of  death  is  taken  away  ;  and  I  do  believe  He  will 
gently  lead  me  along  the  dark  valley  of  the  shadow  of  death  !  We 
must  give  up  ourselves  wholly  to  our  dear  Redeemer,  who  loved  us 
and  gave  himself  for  us."  She  often  repeated  very  emphatically,  "  The 
reward  is  sure  ;"  and  once,  in  a  powerful  voice,  said,  "O  death!  where 
is  thy  sting  1    O  grave  !  where  is  thy  victory  1" 


276 


1846. 


[^T.  59. 


17i5/i.  — After  a  sadly  wakeful  night,  a  quiet  day  in  the 
house;  but  oh,  how  little  is  done,  and  how  little  is  mind 
exercised  !  and  yet  we  exist,  and  even  in  this  state  He  may 
dwell  in  us,  who  is  the  fulness  of  blessing  and  joy  (1  John 
iv.  12).  What  a  void  and  wilderness  when  He  withdraws 
his  presence  !  Who  will  show  us  any  good  ?  Lord,  lift  thou 
up  the  light  of  thy  countenance  upon  us. 


4iT.    51).  J 


18 


.277 


CHAPTER  XVII. 

VISITS      JIEETIN«S     IN     HAMPSHIRE     AND     DORSETSHlllE  INCREASED 

INDISPOSITION  CONCERN     FOR     AUSTRALIA  LETTERS  EVENING 

OF    LIFE  THE  CLOSE. 

Soon  after  the  Yearly  Meeting,  H.  C.  Backhouse 
went  into  Hampshire  and  Dorsetshire,  to  complete  the 
service  which  she  felt  to  be  still  remaining  unperformed, 
under  her  certificate  for  the  Western  counties. 

of  6th  mo. — The  morning  spent  at  Alton.  One  family 
with  whom  I  dined  yesterday  particularly  took  hold  of  my 
mind ;  but,  unwilling  to  enter  on  a  family  visit,  I  came  away 
burdened  on  their  account. 

Gosport,  9th. — We  met  the  two  Friends  of  the  place,  an 
elderly  man  and  woman,  with  a  Friend  of  Southampton,  at 
twelve  o'clock.  I  thought  I  felt  more  life  in  sitting  with 
these  individuals  than  I  often  experience.  I  said  a  little,  and 
was  comforted;  a  little  helped  for  what  was  before  me  for 
the  evening,  which  I  felt  very  formidable  Met  in  the  Inde- 
pendent Meeting-house,  a  large  room  : — I  sat  alone  at  the 
reading  desk.  Some  persons  spoke  kindly  to  me  after  the 
meeting,  desiring  I  might  be  blessed.  I  trust  there  was  a 
feeling  of  good  over  us,  and  that  gospel  truths  were  pro- 
claimed under  right  authority. 

ISth. — Encouraged  by  my  son  Ilodgkin — now  my  com- 
panion, we  left  Basingstoke  early  ;  paid  a  visit  at  the  Andover 
lload  station,  to  a  Friend,  which  my  son  thought  worth 
coming  for  ;  and  in  the  heat  and  dust  went  to  Andover, 
thence  to  Amesbury,  and  Stonehenge,  to  which  we  went  up. 
Reached  Shaftesbury,  went  to  the  Inn,  and  were  kindly 


278 


181G. 


59. 


called  upon  by  John  Rutter;  appointed  a  public  meeting  for 
the  next  evening.  It  liad  been  the  point,  I  think,  most  on 
my  mind  in  coming  to  Shaftesbury. 

15th. — Reached  Maruhull  just  in  time  for  meeting,  which 
was  held  with  a  few  Friends,  and  was,  1  trust,  a  solid  one.  I 
preached  on  being  covetous  of  spiritual  riches, — that  content- 
ment in  a  low  estate  was  an  acceptable  sacrifice,  or  something 
of  the  kind  ;  a  sermon  at  least  for  myself.  Ventured  to 
appoint  a  meeting  for  the  evening,  though  in  the  midst  of 
hay-time.  I  wished  for  a  stronger  call,  but  taking  the  very 
gentle  one,  was  easy  under  it :  some  apparently  nice  serious 
people  came  in,  and  I  believe  the  meeting  was  rightly  held  : 
the  day  was  very  hot.  Almost  before  us  were  the  graves  of 
those  worthies,  whose  memory  was  much  with  me  this  day, — 
William  and  Rebecca  Byrd, — and  I  thought  the  leaven  of 
their  spirits  was  yet  to  be  felt  among  their  neighbours.  We 
were  kindly  entertained  by  Hannah  Hatcher,  one  with  whose 
spirit  it  was  good  to  unite 

17th. — Took  the  train  to  the  nearest  point  to  Alton,  and 
drove  to  Abraham  Crowley's,  [the  family  to  which  her  mind 
had  been  attracted  when  there  before] .  We  were  very  kindly 
received,  and  soon  sat  down  with  them.  I  trust  it  was 
a  required  visit,  and  it  was  a  relief  to  my  mind.  We  left 
Alton,  and  reached  Tottenham  the  same  evening,  with  some 
hope  that  it  was  better  to  return,  and  that  a  continuation  of 
service  in  visiting  families  was  not  required. 

19th. — My  dear  little  grandson  R.  Fox  and  myself  went 
home,  and  got  there  comfortably ;  but  the  arrival  at  home 
was  dull  to  me,  though  externally  very  pleasant. 

29th. — Seized  with  a  shivering  fit,  followed  by  sickness. 
My  sister  and  John  Fothergill  were  sent  for ;  the  former 
remained  with  me  some  time.  I  dozed  most  of  the  day,  and 
did  not  feel  very  ill ;  but  such  an  attack  brought  the  thought 
of  the  end  before  me  seriously.  I  could  do  no  more  than 
commit  myself  into  the  hands  of  Him  who  gave  me  being. 

30th. — I  do  feel  this  condition  of  body  an  awful  one,  and 
crave  that  it  may  have  no  more  dominion  over  my  actions 
than  it  ought  to  have.  Die  I  must,  and  in  that  awful 
moment  may  "  dying  power  be  given  with  dying  hour."  To 
know  that  this  is  possible,  is  a  comfort. 


.rr.  r><).] 


1846. 


I  have  been  with  dear  Barclay  and  Jane  to  our  Monthly 
Meeting  at  Stockton,  where  I  have  given  up  my  certifi- 
catCj  and  comfort  rested  on  doing  so.  I  could  not  tell  of 
the  peace  I  enjoyed,  as  I  have  on  some  former  occasions ; 
rather  that  I  trusted  the  labour  had  not  been  in  vain, 
to  the  humbling  of  my  soul,  and  the  declaration  of  tlie 
goodness  of  our  God.  I  came  home  in  quietude  and  peace  : 
indeed  I  feel  it  cause  for  gratitude,  that  the  way  has  been 
made  so  plain,  and  that  I  have  such  dear  companions  now 
allotted  mc.  It  was  sweet  to  deliver  up  my  darling  boy 
to  his  parents. 

This  was  her  last  ruhgious  engagement  of  so  exten- 
sive a  nature  as  to  call  for  the  sanction  of  the  church. 
To  some  it  may  seem  strange  that  there  should  not  at 
the  close  of  the  work  have  been,  in  the  heart  of  so 
faithful  a  labourer,  more  evident  tokens  of  the 
fulfilment  of  the  promise,—"  He  that  goetli  forth 
and  weepeth,  bearing  precious  seed,  shall  doubtless 
come  again  with  rejoicing,  bringing  his  sheaves 
with  him  yet  truly  her  humble  and  simple  acknow- 
ledgment is  in  perfect  harmony  with  the  precept  of 
her  Lord, — "  Ye,  when  ye  shall  have  done  all  those 
things  which  are  commanded  you,  say  we  are  unprofit- 
able servants,  we  have  done  that  which  was  our  duty 
to  do." 

In  the  foregoing  brief  record  of  the  arduous  labours 
in  the  work  of  the  ministry,  which  occupied  so  large  a 
portion  of  the  life  of  this  devoted  servant  of  the  Lord, 
we  have  seen  practically  exemplified  the  important  truth 
that  the  Christian  is  not  his  own,  and  that  he  is  therefore 
called  upon  to  glorify  God  in  his  body  and  in  his  spirit, 
in  such  way  as  He  whose  they  both  are,  may  see  meet  to 
require.  To  the  eye  of  reason  it  may  appear  strange  that 
one  who  was  a  wife,  a  mother,  and  a  mistress,  should  have 
been  so  much  withdrawn  from  a  participation  in  the 


2S0  1847.  [^T.  60. 

important  duties  inseparable  from  her  position  ;  but  she 
was  emphatically  called  to  walk  by  faith,  not  by  sight, 
and  the  requirement  to  hold  even  the  claims  of  kindred 
in  subordination  to  the  service  of  the  Lord  which  so 
marked  the  tribe  of  Levi  under  the  law,  is  under  the 
Gospel  extended  to  all  who  would  be  the  faithful  and 
self-denying  followers  of  the  Lord  Jesus  Christ. — Matt. 
X.  37,  38. 

7th  of  8th  mo. — Breakfasted  upstairs,  went  down  to  read 
with  the  servants.  Truly  I  ought  to  be  thankful  for  the 
enjoyment  I  have  had  in  the  company  of  my  children  aud 
grandchildren ;  but  my  poor  mind  seems  as  weak  as  the 
body,  and  cannot  bear  much  exertion.  Fanny  [ber  faithful 
servant],  very  kind,  and  a  great  comfort  tome. 

About  this  time  unfavourable  symptoms  increased  so 
much  as  to  cause  her  friends  real  uneasiness  ;  but  she 
was  seldom  prevented  from  the  attendance  of  meetings 
for  worship  as  they  came  in  course,  and  earnestly 
desirous  did  she  continue  to  be  that  the  work  might 
keep  pace  with  the  day.  She  spent  a  few  weeks 
during  this  summer  on  the  sea-coast,  with  her  son 
Hodgkin's  children,  and  on  being  again  at  home  she 
was  helped  by  the  visit  of  some  of  her  dear  relatives 
and  friends.  She  particularly  notices  a  farewell  visit 
from  her  friend  Benjamin  Seebohm,  accompanied  by 
his  wife,  previously  to  his  leaving  England  ;  in  reference 
to  which  she  says  : — 

The  weight  and  savour  of  his  spirit  were  very  sweet  and 
instructive.  After  breakfast  he  expressed  a  few  words  to  the 
servants,  and  afterwards  as  we  were  sitting  together,  to  me  ; 
saying  he  had  thought  of  me  whilst  dwelhug  on  the  text, 
"  I  have  graven  thee  on  tlie  palms  of  my  hands,  thy  walls  are 
continually  before  me.'^    He  did  not  say  many  other  words. 


.liT.  60.] 


18-17. 


2H1 


but  tliesc  brought  an  encoura<rcment  to  me  which  I  did  not 
expect.  May  his  work,  [alluding  to  the  visit  to  America  on 
which  he  was  about  to  enter,]  be  blessed  to  the  turning 
of  those  to  whom  he  is  sent  into  the  right  way  of  the  Lord, 
and  to  the  confirming  of  those  who  are  already  there  ! 

27th. — Dear  E.  H.  Hunt's  visit  has  been  very  sweet  and 
pleasant.  We  were  quiet  and  truly  happy  together,  and  1 
trust  we  may  have  encouraged  each  other  in  that  which  is 
good. 

6th  of  -  1st  mo.,  1847. — Whilst  writing  in  my  sitting-room, 
my  sisters  K.  Backhouse  and  E.  Pease  came  in,  and  care- 
fully broke  to  me  the  affecting  intelligence  that  dear  Joseph 
John  Gurney  had  drawn  his  last  breath.  It  was  astounding 
news  :  we  had  heard  of  his  being  ill,  but  had  no  idea  of 
danger.  They  had  been  alarmed  on  First-day,  and  on 
Second-day  night  he  gently  breathed  his  last. 

8th. — Arrived  at  Earlham.  I  saw  the  remains  ;  they 
were  beautiful^  and  a  smile  of  entire  peace  and  repose  rested 
upon  them.    Peace  seemed  to  reign  in  the  house. 

To  E.  W.  WlSTAR. 

Polam  Hill,  24tli  of  3id  mo.,  1847. 

My  BELOVED  EllIEND, 

The  note  that  I  have  lately  received  from  thee 
was  truly  welcome.  It  is  pleasant  to  be  remembered  in  the 
second  degree  of  sympathy,  which  is  more  apt  to  be  over- 
looked than  the  first.  We  have  indeed  met  with  a  loss 
that  can  never  be  repaired ;  but  his  time  was  no  doubt  fully 
come,  and  could  we  have  retained  him  it  would  have  been 
no  profit  to  ourselves  and  no  good  to  him.  Such  has  often 
been  my  persuasion  concerning  those  who  are  taken  aw  ay, 
bitter  as  the  pang  has  been  to  part  with  them  ;  such  is  the 
course  of  human  life,  and  in  the  submission  to  it  we  have 
to  bow  to  a  will  that  is  higher  than  ours,  and  to  trust  our- 
selves to  it  for  the  perfecting  of  that  which  concernoth  us. 
His  death  brings  the  end  of  all  things  here  very  near  before 
some  of  us.  Our  companion  in  life, — may  he  be  so  in 
another  world!    Truly  the  memory  of  the  just  is  blessed; 


282 


1817. 


[.ET.  CO. 


and  his  memory  will  remain,  brigliteniiig  1  should  thii)k 
as  years  pass  on,  and  as  the  slanders  to  which  he  has  been 
subjected  die  their  natural  death. 

H.  C.  Backhouse. 

28//<. — Went  to  Nevvington  Meeting  to  attend  C.  Majolier's 
wedding.  I  was  sensible,  to  a  degree  that  I  have  long  been 
ignorant  of,  of  the  arising  of  life,  and  bore  a  short  testimony 
to  it,  which  was  responded  to  by  John  Finch  Marsh  : 
altogether  the  meeting  was  agreeable  and  truly  refreshing 
to  me. 

Darlington,  Idtk  of  4t/i  mo. — Dear  Barclay,  Jane  and  the 
children  left  me.  Before  we  parted  I  ventured  to  commend 
them  and  ourselves  to  Him  whom  we  have  desired  to  serve, 
and  who  has  so  blessed  us  together  at  this  time.  Oh  !  may  He 
keep  us  where  no  evil  can  come  near  us,  even  in  the  hollow 
of  his  hand  ! 

One  of  her  favourite  occupations  at  this  time  was 
that  of  aivinfi;  her  grandson  J.  B.  Iiod'2;kin  his  niorninji- 
lesson.  She  greatly  enjoyed  having  him  under  her 
own  roof  for  many  weeks  together. 

John  Hodgkin's  dear  children  have  been  with  me.  My 
health  but  indifferent — poor  uights  and  languid  days — some- 
times solicitous  about  the  well-being  of  the  soul — little  light 
or  peace,  and  yet  no  great  uneasiness,  and  preserved  from 
much  exercise  of  mind. 

To  E.  P.  GURNEY. 

Polam  Hill,  Uth  ol'  7tli  mo.,  1847. 
My  DEAllLY  BELOVED  EllIEND, 

Thy  last  letter  was  a  real  treat  to  me  *  *  *  * 
I  do  love  those  scriptural  views  of  the  resurrection  ;  indeed, 
they  sccin  to  me  to  be  so  intimately  blended  with  our  belief, 
that  1  do  not  know  how  they  can  be  separated.    With  the 


^.T.  61.] 

weiglit  of  tlie  flesh  pressing  licavily,  we  cannot  be  sorry  that 
flesh  and  blood  cannot  inherit  the  kingdom ;  but  that  they 
should  be  the  seed  of  that  body  that  is  raised  we  cannot  but 
rejoice  in — indeed,  how  otherwise  personal  identity  should  be 
retained  we  cannot  conceive  ;  and  that  it  is  so,  we  cannot  have 
the  shadow  of  a  doubt.  "  God  is  not  the  God  of  the  dead  but 
of  the  living."  How  these  texts  do  come  home  when  we  lose 
those  who  have  been  very  dear  to  us,  so  that  we  can  view 
them  as  departed  for  a  season,  and  anticipate  a  blessed  re- 
union, a  perfect  oneness  in  the  perfection  of  glory  and  of 
love  !  These  ideas  are  not  visionary  ;  they  are  borne  out  by 
Scripture,  and  the  more  I  lose,  the  more  I  seem  to  dwell  upon 
them  as  certainties,  with  delight,  even  when  pressed  down 
by  the  thick  veil  of  the  flesh,  which  it  is  almost  impossible 
to  penetrate.  Yet  that  these  things  shall  be,  if  we  faint 
not,  I  have  no  manner  of  doubt,  little  as  I  can  now  realize 
them.  . 

H.  C.  Backhouse. 

\7th  of  Sth  mo. — A  pleasant  ride  with  Abigail  Thorpe  and 
Ann  Eliza  Dale  to  Barnard  Castle.  Saw  the  castle  before  tea  ; 
which  we  really  enjoyed.  Nothing  like  the  present  moment ! 
I  felt  something  [of  religious  concern]  towards  the  man  who 
showed  it  to  us — a  curious  inhabitant  of  the  old  ruin — but  did 
not  yield  to  it.  Afterwards  I  found  that  A.  E.  Dale  had  had 
the  same  feeling,  and  had  spoken  to  him  a  few  words  at  the 
gate.  I  proposed  to  go  and  see  him  on  our  return,  but  this 
return  never  came.  At  Cotherstone  I  found  that  an  account 
had  been  received  of  the  death  of  my  brother,  John  Backhouse; 
it  was  appalling,  though  we  had  long  looked  for  a  sudden  ter- 
mination of  his  life.  Stunned  and  stupified  I  sat  through  the 
meeting,  which  was  a  solemn  one,  and  afterwards  I  went  to 
Shull,  where  I  saw  my  dear  sister,  [Katharine  Backhouse], 
and  Eliza,  and  felt  it  sweet  to  be  with  them,  and  to  minister 
a  little  to  them;  and  also  to  see  the  remains,  which  bore 
the  marks  of  a  peaceful  and  redeemed  spirit  having  taken  its 
departure. 

22nd. —  [The  day  of  the  interment.]  Thankful,  I  believe, 
we  all  were  for  a  day  so  favoured,  uniting  our  hearts  in  peace 
and  love. 


284. 


1848. 


[^T.  61. 


The  deceased  was  one  of  the  few  with  whom  she  held 
intimate  communion.  His  chastened  and  refined  spirit 
was  often  a  comfort  and  help  to  her  in  outward  affliction 
and  in  spiritual  conflicts. 

2tid  of  2nd  mo.,  1848. — Fanny  came  in  to  say  that  William 
Backhouse  wished  to  speak  to  me,  and  that  there  had  been  a 
very  poor  account  of  Anna  C.  Backhouse.  On  going  down 
stairs  I  found  she  was  gone.  I  went  at  once  to  my  dear 
sister  and  EUza,  and  found  them  much  overcome  :  a  letter 
from  John  brought  the  information,  and  with  it  some  con- 
soling particulars. 

The  event  here  so  briefly  glanced  at  was  the  death  of 
the  only  daughter  of  Joseph  John  Gurney,  w^ho  having 
gone  with  her  husband  and  two  infant  children  to  the 
South  of  Europe,  in  consequence  of  her  delicate  health, 
had  died  on  board  a  steamer  off"  Palermo,  in  Avhich  they 
had  taken  refuge  from  an  insurrection  which  had  broken 
out.  Notwithstanding  the  alarm  and  hurry  of  their 
flight  from  the  city,  and  the  trial  of  meeting  death  under 
such  circumstances,  there  was  ample  evidence  that, 
through  the  Saviour's  love,  her  end  was  peace. 

11 /A. — This  day  brought  the  affecting  intelligence  of 
my  niece  Maiy  W.  Barclay's  death.  This  last  stroke  has 
been  astounding ;  after  much  conflict  of  mind,  she  became 
tranquil,  and  expressed  the  most  undoubting  assurance  of 
the  mercy  of  God  her  Saviour,  to  the  great  comfort  of  those 
about  her. 

24th. — Have  been  to  meeting — stupid,  and  sleepy,  and 
cold.  What  is  to  become  of  me  ?  A  few  words  from  my 
sister,  on  Him  "  who  is  touched  with  the  feeling  of  our  infir- 
mities," and  a  sure  refuge  in  the  day  of  trouble.  She  spoke 
the  language  of  present  experience  I  doubt  not. 

5tk  of  ith  mo. — With  my  cousin  Edward  Pease,  met  Mary 
Nicholson  and  Daniel  P.  Hack  [then  on  a  religious  engage- 


-F/r.  G\.] 


1848. 


285 


mentj  to  consult  about  their  proceeding's,  and  was,  I  believe, 
of  some  use.  *  *  *  I  was  ratlier  surprised  at  the  com- 
fort tliat  flowed  into  niy  heart  from  giving  this  help  to  a 
disciple. 

17ih. — An  interesting  morning  at  the  Black  Boy  Schools, 
examining  the  children,  and  distributing  the  prizes.  I  felt 
comfortable  in  the  employment,  and  went  through  it  with 
more  spirit  than  usual. 

24t/i  of  5/h  mo. — Yearly  Meeting  began.  The  dulness  of 
ray  state  spiritually  was  felt  by  me.  Very  little  was  the 
amount  of  my  vocal  service,  though  I  sought  diligently  to 
do  my  duty :  often  the  meeting  seemed  full  enough  of 
preaching.  Altogether,  it  was  not  a  bright  Yearly  Meeting, 
but  the  right  thing  had  the  ascendancy ;  and,  in  conclusion, 
we  had  to  acknowledge  that  we  were  not  a  forsaken  people, — 
a  High-priest  having  the  Urim  and  Thummim  being  yet 
amongst  us. 

On  the  22nd  of  Ninth  month  H.  C.  Backhouse  at- 
tended the  marriage,  at  Falmouth,  of  her  son  Edmund 
with  JuHet  Mary  Fox.  "A  time,"  she  says,  "  to  be 
remembered  with  thankfuhiess." 

This  event  was  an  especial  cause  of  joy  and  happi- 
ness to  her  ;  and  she  had  the  additional  comfort  of 
retaining  her  son  and  daughter  under  her  own  roof, 
and  being  lovingly  cared  for  by  them  through  the  re- 
mainder of  her  life. 

Falmouth,  24^A.— This  morning  quite  a  happy  meeting, — 
I  was  silent.  In  the  afternoon  I  supplicated  for  this  part  of 
the  heritage,  and  took  leave  of  them  with  a  mind  greatly 
relieved. 

%Qth. — A  beautiful  ride  to  Plymouth.  My  mind  remarkably 
at  peace. 

i^Qth. — Glad  to  arrive  at  home,  feeling  I  had  been  merci- 
fully dealt  with ;  having  escaped  doubts  and  hesitations,  and 
enjoyed  abundance  of  blessing  every  way.  "  Bless  the 
Lord,  O  ray  soul  !  and  forget  not  all  his  benefits.  '' 


286  1848.  [;et.  01. 

5t/i  of  I2th  mo. — Monthly  Meeting  a  comfortable  one, 
but  I  liad  no  share  in  the  vocal  service.  Well,  may  this 
silence  raise  the  question,  How  is  it  with  me?  Am  I  grown 
inscusible  to  good,  or  sliall  I  ever  feel  as  I  have  done? 
"  Let  integrity  and  uprightness  preserve  me."''  Let  me  be 
sure  the  fault  is  not  mine,  and  then  I  can  take  this  release 
from  much  exercise  as  a  favour,  hoping  that  one  day  without 
the  exercise  of  so  precious  a  gift  as  that  of  the  ministry  of 
the  word,  I  shall  enjoy  the  lifting  up  of  the  light  of  His 
countenance,  in  beholding  of  which  there  is  perfect  peace 
and  joy ;  but  now  it  is  much  hidden  from  me. 

9th. — I  am  expecting  before  this  day  concludes  to  welcome 
my  beloved  E.  P.  Gurnej^,  and  her  sister  and  niece. 

Evening — Which  I  did  wdth  all  my  heart,  and  they  seemed 
to  come  with  theirs. 

To  Mary  James  Leckey. 

■9th  of  ]2tli  mo.,  1848. 

Thou  art  welcome  to  the  history  of  me  and 
mine,  so  far  as  I  can  give  it ;  for  myself  I  suppose  it  may  be 
said,  I  am  poor,  but  quiet  and  peaceful ;  as  to  religious  engage- 
ments, I  have  had  so  little  to  do  with  them  of  late,  that  they 
appear  as  a  tale  that  is  told.  I  hope  it  may  not  arise  from 
lukewarmness  or  insensibility.  My  health  is  tolerable  ;  but 
weariness  is  often  my  portion,  and  I  am  obliged  to  take  care 
that  I  am  not  over-fatigued.  The  truth  is,  I  am  advancing 
in  years,  and  cannot  expect  the  healtli  and  vigour  of  youth, 
and  my  habits  are  getting  accommodated  to  it.  There  is 
certainly,  in  such  a  state,  much  to  remind  us  of  our  latter 
end,  for  which  may  we  indeed  be  prepared !  but  we  must 
increasingly  feel  that  we  cannot  prepare  ourselves,  and  that 
our  entrance  through  the  pearl  gates  is  through  pure 
unmerited  mercy.  All  our  experience  goes  to  deepen  this 
great  truth,  both  for  ourselves  and  for  others. 

We  now  approach  an  event  in  the  life  of  this 
devoted  servant  of  the  Lord  Jesus  Christ  which 
strikingly  marks  her  unflinching;  acceptance  of  the 


.ET  ()2.]  18 ]y.  287 

terms  of  (lisciplcsliip  ;  showino-  that  neither  children, 
nor  outward  ease  and  comfort,  nor  the  rest  which 
seemed  so  needful  for  her,  nor  even  life  itself,  was  put 
in  competition,  with  the  love  of  Him  whose  she 
was,  and  whom  with  a  willing  mind  she  desired  to 
serve.  Truly  she  counted  not  her  life  dear  unto  her- 
self, that  she  might  finish  her  course  with  joy,  and  the 
ministry  which  she  had  received  of  the  Lord  Jesus  ;  to 
testify  the  gospel  of  the  grace  of  God. 

We  also  recognize  in  this  passage  of  her  life  a  fresh 
evidence  of  the  tender  regard  and  compassion  of  her 
God  ;  even  the  God  of  Abraham,  w^hom  she  so  often 
exhorted  others  to  serve  with  the  faith  of  Abraham. 
Having  as  we  believe,  proved  her  faith  by  calling  her 
to  a  sacrifice  and  service  of  a  peculiarly  formidable 
character,  He  condescended,  as  we  trust,  to  accept  the 
surrender  of  the  whole  will,  and  to  release  her,  by  the 
clear  and  united  judgment  of  the  church,  from  the  work 
which  had  been  presented  to  the  eye  of  faith,  as  required 
at  her  hands. 

20(h  of  Srd  mo. — The  first  meeting  was  very  serious.  At 
the  end  T  knelt  supplicating  in  few  words  tliat  the  Lord's 
will,  not  ours,  might  be  done.  I  requested  that  Friemls 
might  be  stopped^  and  I  laid  before  them  a  concern  tliat  had 
been  for  some  time  on  my  mind^  but  which  had  of  late 
Aveightily  impressed  it ;  to  pay  a  visit,  iu  the  love  of 
the  gospeb  to  Friends  in  Van  Diemeu's  Land  and  parts  of 
Australia.  I  made  no  comment,  and  sat  down.  Thci'c  was 
a  profound  silence  for  some  time ;  then  A.  E.  Dale  knelt, 
and,  iu  a  very  striking  manner  petitioned  that,  as  it  was 
with  Abraham,  the  sacrifice  might  be  accepted,  and  a  ram 
provided  in  its  stead.  My  sister  Katharine,  after  some 
silence,  rose,  and  said  she  had  been  reflecting  on  Christ  as 
the  leader  of  his  people  individually,  and  as  head  of  his 
Church.  Had  it  not  been  for  the  renewal  of  her  faith  this 
day,  her  heart  would  have  fainted;  but,  while  thinking  of 


288 


1849. 


[^T.  62. 


this  subject,  she  had  remembered  a  passage  in  tlie  life  of  the 
patriarcli  David  :  when  he  told  the  propliet  that  it  was  his 
intention  to  build  a  house  for  the  Lord  his  God,  the  prophet 
immediately  answered,  "  Do  all  that  is  in  thy  heart,  for  the 
Lord  thy  God  is  with  thee  but  after  lie  was  gone,  the  king 
received  a  message  from  the  Lord  forbidding  him  to  do  it ; 
but  that  it  was  well  that  it  was  in  his  heart.  So  she  believed 
it  was  well  it  had  been  in  the  heart  of  her  dear  sister,  but 
she  trusted  that  the  will  would  be  accepted  for  the  deed, — 
that  now  in  the  evening  of  her  day  she  might  be  excused,  but 
that  it  might  prepare  the  way  for  some  other  labourer  to  enter 
the  same  field.  Several  others  spoke  to  the  like  purport. 
This  was  evidently  the  mind  of  the  meeting.  I  then  thought 
I  might  conclude  it  by  saying  that  I  now  felt  satisfied  and 
could  rejoicingly  accept  the  judgment  of  my  friends.  Thus 
ended  this  momentous  affair.  I  saw  that  several  had  been  in 
tears.  I  was  quite  unmoved  myself,  having  been  preserved 
from  any  emotion,  from  the  beginning  to  the  end. 

My  health  is  altogether  I  think  rather  improved,  but  my 
nights  ax*e  often  very  sleepless  j  as  to  spirituals  I  am  so  dull 
I  fear  some  fault  on  my  part,  but  a  sort  of  quiet  peacefulness 
makes  me  hope  I  am  not  forsaken.  Dear  Jane's  children 
being  with  me  is  a  great  treat,  and  I  have  leisure  to  enjoy 
them.  I  talk  but  little,  and  leave  to  those  of  another 
generation  many  of  the  activities  of  life.  Truly  I  am 
surrounded  with  benefits  and  mercies  ! 

In  the  Fifth  Month  she  attended  the  Yearly  Meeting 
for  the  last  time. 

Ath  of  6th  TOO.— Went  to  White  Hart  Court  to  the 
meeting  of  the  Prison  Discipline  Society,  where  I  was  much 
interested.  Surely  dear  E.  Fry's  labours  have  not  been  in 
vain  !  A  portion  of  her  sweet  spirit  seemed  to  rest  upon  us. 

3rd  of  9ih  mo. — I  have  had  a  pleasant  comfortable  visit  to 
my  dear  friend  E.  P.  Gurney ;  I  believe  it  has  been  well- 
timed;  it  has  renewed  that  feeling  of  near  afi'ection  which 
will  continue,  I  trust,  so  long  as  we  live.  She  had  evidently 
grown  in  the  school  of  Christ,  and  her  chief  dependence  was 


-KT.  62.] 


1849. 


289 


on  Him  aloue.  I  enjoyed  seeing  her  fill  a  plaee  of  extensive 
usefulness,  both  among  Friends  and  in  her  own  family. 

In  the  same  month  a  short  time  was  spent  in 
Cornwall. 

22nd. — A  day  of  rest ;  sweet  to  be  with  my  children ; 
preparation  for  departure  on  Second-day. 

23rd. — Favoured  with  a  good  meeting  at  Falmouth,  in 
which  I  was  enabled  to  approach  the  throne  with,  I  trust, 
some  fervent  petitions.  I  added  a  few  words  in  testimony  ; 
which  concluded  the  meeting. 

29th. — Arrived  at  home,  and  was  most  sweetly  welcomed 
by  my  dear  son  and  daughter.  I  was  weary,  but  rejoiced  to 
be  so  comfortably  at  home  again.  Well  might  I  return 
thanks  for  the  preservation  afforded  during  my  absence,  and 
for  my  happy  return. 

SOth. — An  interesting  meeting  :  almost  all  of  those  in  the 
galleiy  had  been  absent  from  home  some  time  ;  the  ministry 
flowed  sweetly ;  I  knelt  down  at  the  conclusion ;  kept  at 
home  in  the  evening ;  the  savour  of  the  meeting  truly 
precious. 

The  remainder  of  her  journal  contains  entries  which 
indicate  her  diligence  in  the  attendance  of  meetings, 
often  under  feebleness  and  exhaustion  ;  and  also  some 
notices  of  more  private  labour,  and  a  record  (»f  hei" 
thankfulness  for  family  mercies,  and  especially  for  the 
filling  of  her  cup  of  blessing  m  the  bii'th  of  a  grandson 
— the  first  child  of  her  onl}'  son. 

The  work  was  now  nearly  done,  and  she  felt  it  to 
be  so  ;  yet  she  could  look  calmly  forward  to  the  end 
which,  without  any  very  defiinite  views,  she  knew  cor.ld 
not  be  far  distant. 

13th  of  10th  7T10.,  1849. 

I  am  not  much  recovered ;  I  sleep  badly  at 
night,  which  has  long  been  my  chief  ailment,  and  which 

r 


290 


1850. 


[/ET.  63. 


luakes  me  feel  languid  during  the  day,  but  with  care  I 
get  on  pretty  well,  though  the  weariness  of  the  flesh  is 
often  reminding  me  of  my  latter  end,  which  I  think  I 
can  contemplate  with  lessened  natural  fear,  but  without 
any  bright  visions  of  future  glory  ;  but  I  may  leave  all  in 
llis  hands  who  has  hitherto  dealt  bountifully  with  me; 
who,  in  the  dying  hour,  gives  dying  grace,  and  whose 
strength  is  made  perfect  when  we  are  the  weakest.  So  we 
may  rest  in  Him,  the  Lord  Jesus  Christ,  as  our  only  hope  of 
glory. 

Her  last  illness  was,  in  its  earlier  stages,  attended 
with  severe  pain,  which  she  endured  with  great 
patience.  The  attack  however,  was  of  short  duration, 
and  she  was  generally  exempt  from  much  sufl'ering, 
and  able  to  listen  with  interest  to  the  reading  of  the 
Scriptures,  as  well  as  some  biographical  works.  On  the 
3rd  of  the  Fourth  Month  she  wrote  to  her  beloved 
friend  E.  H.  Hunt— 

I  am  mercifully  cared  for,  both  internally  and  externally ; 
my  mind  is  preserved  in  much  quietude,  and  as  to  nurses,  I 
have  ray  heart's  content;  having  dear  Jane,  and  E.  P. 
Gurney,  and  Eliza  Barclay,  and  ray  most  faithful  Fanny. 
I  often  think  of  the  pleasure  it  would  be  to  see  thee,  a 
pleasure  which  is,  I  trust,  in  reserve,  at  no  distant  period. 

She  would  occasionally  refer  to  the  seriousness 
of  her  illness,  and  to  its  probable  termination  ; 
but  these  remarks  were  generally  made  with  her 
wonted  cheerfulness,  and  in  a  manner  that  indi- 
cated the  condition  of  a  mind  at  peace  with  God. 
Hers  was  not  a  gloomy  chamber,  far  otherwise  ; 
there  the  Lord  of  Life  shed  his  enlivening  influence, 
and  thence  frequently  arose  the  incense  of  prayer  and 
praise. 


AiT.  63.] 


1850. 


291 


On  First-day  evening,  the  5tli  of  Fifth  Month, 
she  underwent  for  a  time  extreme  suffering,  succeeded 
by  partial  paralysis..  Consciousness,  however,  con- 
tinued to  the  close,  and  she  responded  with  a  look  of 
deep  significance  to  the  words  of  the  Psalmist,  repeated 
for  her  comfort :  "  When  I  walk  through  the  valley  of 
the  shadow  of  death,  I  will  fear  no  evil." 

About  noon  on  the  6  th  she  quietly  expired. 

The  v  alley  passed,  her  pilgrimage  ended,  her  toils 
and  conflicts  over,  and  all  crowns  cast  at  the  feet  of 
her  Lord,  she  is  added,  we  believe  beyond  all  manner 
of  doubt,  to  the  countless  multitude,  who  ascribe 
"  blessing,  and  honour,  and  glory,  and  power,  unto  Him 
that  sitteth  upon  the  throne,  and  unto  the  Lamb,  for 
ever  and  ever." 


FlNiy. 


I,(..\n(iN  ;   KK  UAIiTl  liAllllLIT,    IBlMtli,    MAUK  LA^E. 


j 


I'