Skip to main content

Full text of "The Kiss and Its History"

See other formats


Google 



This is a digital copy of a book that was preserved for generations on library shelves before it was carefully scanned by Google as part of a project 

to make the world's books discoverable online. 

It has survived long enough for the copyright to expire and the book to enter the public domain. A public domain book is one that was never subject 

to copyright or whose legal copyright term has expired. Whether a book is in the public domain may vary country to country. Public domain books 

are our gateways to the past, representing a wealth of history, culture and knowledge that's often difficult to discover. 

Marks, notations and other maiginalia present in the original volume will appear in this file - a reminder of this book's long journey from the 

publisher to a library and finally to you. 

Usage guidelines 

Google is proud to partner with libraries to digitize public domain materials and make them widely accessible. Public domain books belong to the 
public and we are merely their custodians. Nevertheless, this work is expensive, so in order to keep providing tliis resource, we liave taken steps to 
prevent abuse by commercial parties, including placing technical restrictions on automated querying. 
We also ask that you: 

+ Make non-commercial use of the files We designed Google Book Search for use by individuals, and we request that you use these files for 
personal, non-commercial purposes. 

+ Refrain fivm automated querying Do not send automated queries of any sort to Google's system: If you are conducting research on machine 
translation, optical character recognition or other areas where access to a large amount of text is helpful, please contact us. We encourage the 
use of public domain materials for these purposes and may be able to help. 

+ Maintain attributionTht GoogXt "watermark" you see on each file is essential for in forming people about this project and helping them find 
additional materials through Google Book Search. Please do not remove it. 

+ Keep it legal Whatever your use, remember that you are responsible for ensuring that what you are doing is legal. Do not assume that just 
because we believe a book is in the public domain for users in the United States, that the work is also in the public domain for users in other 
countries. Whether a book is still in copyright varies from country to country, and we can't offer guidance on whether any specific use of 
any specific book is allowed. Please do not assume that a book's appearance in Google Book Search means it can be used in any manner 
anywhere in the world. Copyright infringement liabili^ can be quite severe. 

About Google Book Search 

Google's mission is to organize the world's information and to make it universally accessible and useful. Google Book Search helps readers 
discover the world's books while helping authors and publishers reach new audiences. You can search through the full text of this book on the web 

at |http: //books .google .com/I 




Harvard College 
Library 




FROM THE FUND OF 

HARRIET J. G. DENNY 

or BOffioif 



*44- 




r 



/ 



THE KISS AND ITS HISTORY 



(• 



THE KISS 



an^ tt0 Distort 



BY 

Dr CHRISTOPHER NYROP 

Professor of Romance Philology at the University of Copenhagen 

TRANSLATED BY 

WILLIAM FREDERICK HARVEY 

M.A,y Hertford College y Oxford; Barrister-at-Law of the Inner 
Temple ; Lecturer in English at the University of Lund 
(Sweden); sometime Professor of English Literature 
at the University of Malta 



LONDON 

SANDS & CO. 

12 BURLEIGH STREET, STRAND 

I9OI 



\^51\^.^1,5 



M 










TO 

WALTER BENSON, Esquire 

1 DEDICATE MY MODEST PART IN THIS BOOK 

IN TOKEN OP A FRIENDSHIP WHICH 

HAS GROWN STAUNCHER WITH 

THE GROWTH OF 

YEARS 



THEOCRITUS, /(iy/ xxviii., 24, 25. 

"Surely great grace goes with a little gift, and all the offerings 
of friends are precious." 



a 2 



Je c616bre des jeux paisibles, 
Qu'en vain on semble mepriser, 

Les vrais biens des dmes sensibles, 
Lcs doux niysldros dii baiser. 



DORAT 



To gentle sports due praise I render, 

At which some wits have vainly sneered: 

The true delight of spirits tender, 

The kiss's mysteries endeared. 

W. F. H. 



TRANSLATOR'S PREFACE 

The following treatise, which is the work of 
a Romance philologist of high European repu- 
tation, has not only gone through two editions 
in Denmark, but has also been translated into 
German, Swedish, and Russian. The popu- 
larity which this learned and at the same time 
charming little book rapidly acquired abroad, 
and the favourable criticisms passed on it by 
Conlincnlal scholars, have encouraged me to 
present it to my fellow-countrymen in an 
English dress. With regard to the numerous 
poetical quotations that form so striking a 
feature of this book, those which I have 
translated myself may be distinguished from 
such as I have borrowed from standard versions 
by the appended initials, W. F. H. 

Inner Tkmplk, 
London, md August 1901. 



VII 



AUTHOR'S PREFACE 

Wenn ich nur selber wusste, 
Was mir in die Seele zischt! 

Die Worte mid die Kiisse 
Sind wunderbar vermischt. 

Oh, could I but decipher 
What 'tis that fills my mind. 

The words are with the kisses 
So wond'rously combined. 



Heine. 



Dante, in the fifth canto of his Hell^ has 
celebrated the power a kiss may have over 
human beings. In the course of his wander- 
ings in the nether world, when he has reached 
the spot where abide those who have sinned 
through love, he sees two souls that "flutter 
so lightly in the wind." These are Francesco 
da Rimini and her brother-in-law Paolo. He 
asks Francesco to tell him : 

" In the time of your sweet sighs, 
By what, and how love granted, that ye knew 
Your yet uncertain wishes ? " 

ix 



% AUTHOR'S PREFACE 

Whereto she rq>lies : 

^ One day 
For oor delight we read of Lancelot, 
Hoir him love thtall'd. Alone we were, and no 
Stiqncion near us. Ofttimes by that reading 
Oitr eyes were drawn together, and the hue 
Fled from our altered checks But at one point 
Alone we fell. When of that smile we read, 
The wished smile, so rapturously kissed 
By one so deep in love, then he^ who ne'er 
From me shall separate, at once my lips 
All trembling kiss'd. The book and writer both 
Were love's purveyors. In its leaves that day 
We read no more." * 

I h;ivc had a sjx^cial object in iirefacinj^ my 
studies on the history of kissing with these 
famous verses, for I regarded it in the light of 
a duty to caution my readers emphatically, and 
at the very outset, as to the danger of even 
reading about kisses; and I consider that, 
having done this, I have warned my readers 
against pursuing the subject, and " forewarned 
is forearmed," or, *' homme avcrti en vaut dctLx^ 

* H. F, Gary's translation. 



TABLE OF CONTENTS 



CHAP. 

I. What is a Kiss? . 


• 




PAGl 

3 


II. Love Kisses 






29 


III. Affectionate Kisses 






79 


IV. The Kiss of Peace 






lOI 


V. The Kiss of Respect 






"3 


VI. The Kiss of FRiENnsnir 






141 


Vll. Various Kinds of Kisses 






161 


VIII. The Origin of Kissing . 






177 


L*Envoi 






. 189 



I 



WHAT IS A KISS ? 



A 



CHAPTER I 

WHAT IS A KISS? 

It may perhaps seem somewhat futile to 
begin with discussing what a kiss is : that 
every child of course knows. We are 
greeted with kisses directly we enter the 
world, .and kisses follow us all our life long, 
as 1 lolty sings — 

Giving kisses, snatching kisses, 
Keeps the busy world employed. 

W. F. H. 

Nevertheless the question is not altogether 
superfluous. It seems to mc even to offer 
certain points of interest, inasmuch as it is 
by no means so easy as people may imagine 
to define what a kiss is. If we turn to the 
poets we are often put oflf with the answer 
that a kiss is something that should be 
merely felt, and that people would do well 



4 THE KISS 

to refrain from speculating as to what it 
actually is. 

What says this glance ? What meaning lurks in this 
Squeezing of hands, embrace, and lingVing kiss ? 
This only can your heart explain to you. 
What have such matters with the brain to do ? 

W. F. H. 

So, for instance, says Aarestrup ; but he adds 
as a sort of explanation — 

But when I see thee my fond kiss denying, 

And straightway, nathless, mine embrace not spurning, 

Then needs must I to tedious arts be turning, 

And let crabbM wisdom from my lips go flying. 

Know then the voice alone interprets rightful 
And with poetic fire from heart's depth welleth, 
And yet the sweetest of them all by no means I 

Whereas the bosom, arms, and lips, and eye-sheens — 
How shall I call it ? for the total swelleth 
Unto a language wordless as delightful. 

W. F. H. 

which has not brought us nearer to a solu- 
tion of the question. Other poets give 
us an allegorical transcription, couched in 
vague poetical terms, which rather refer to 
the feelings of which the kiss may be an 
expression than attempt to define its physi- 
ology. Thus Paul Verlaine defines a kiss 
as ** the fiery accompaniment on the key- 



WHAT IS A KISS ? 6 

board of the teeth of the lovely songs which 
love sings in a burning heart." 

Baiser I rose tremi^re au jardin des caresses ! 

Vif accoinpagncment sur le clavier des dents, 

Dcs doux refrains qu'Atnour chatile cii les ccciirs ardcnls 

Avec sa voix d'archange aiix langueurs charnieresses I 

This definition, which seems to me to be 
as original as it is beautiful and apt, deals, 
however, exclusively with the kiss of love ; 
but kisses, as we all know, are capable of 
expressing many other emotions, and it 
enlightens us not one whit as to the external 
side of the nature of a kiss. Let us, there- 
fore, leave the poets, and seek refuge with 
the philologists. 

In the Dictionary of the Danish Philo- 
logical Society ( Videnskabernes Selskabs Ordbog) 
a kiss is defined as "a pressure of the 
mouth against a body." As every one 
at once perceives, this explanation is very 
unsatisfactory, for, from the above statements, 
we could hardly accept more than one, viz., 
the mouth. Now, of course, it is quite clear 
that one of the first requisites for a kiss is 
a mouth. ** Eincn Kuss an sich, ohnc Mund, 
kann man nicht geben," say the Germans, 



J 



6 THE KISS 

and it is also remarkable that in Finnish, 
antaa sunta, "to kiss," means literally "to 
give mouth." 

How does the mouth produce a kiss? 

A kiss is produced by a kind of sucking 
movement of the muscles of the lips, accom- 
panied by a weaker or louder sound. Thus, 
from a purely phonetic point of view, a kiss 
may be defined as an inspiratory bilabial 
sound, which English phoneticians call the 
lip-click, i.e.^ the sound made by smacking 
the lip. This movement of the muscles, 
however, is not of itself sufficient to produce 
a kiss, it being, as you know, employed by 
coachmen when they want to start their 
horses ; but it becomes a kiss only when it is 
used as an expression of a certain feeling, and 
when the lips are pressed against, or simply 
come into contact with, a living creature 
or object. 

The sound which follows a kiss has been 
carefully investigated by the Austrian savant, 
W. von Kcmpelcn, in his remarkable book 
entitled The Mechanism of Human Speech 
(Wien, 1 791). He divides kisses into three 
sorts, according to their sound. First he treats 
of kisses proper, which he characterises as 



WHAT IS A KISS? 7 

a freundschaftlich hellklatschendcr Herzensktiss 
(an affectionate, clear-ringing kiss coming 
from the heart) ; next he defines the more 
discreet, or, from an acoustic point of view, 
weaker kiss ; and, lastly, speaks contemptu- 
ously of a third kind of kiss, which is desig- 
nated an ekelhafter Schmatz (a loathsome 
smack). 

Many other writers have, although in a 
less scientific manner, sought to define and 
elucidate the sound that arises from a kiss. 
Johannes j0rgensen says very delicately in his 
Stemninger that ** the plash of the waves 
against the pebbles of the beach is like the 
sound of long kisses." 

It is generally, however, an exclusively 
humorous or satirical aspect that is most 
conspicuous. In the Seducers Diary 
(Forf0rerens dagbog) of Soren Kierkegaard, 
Johannes speaks of the engaged couples who 
used to assemble in numbers at his uncle s 
house : ** Without interruption, the whole 
evenings through, one hears a sound as if a 
person was going round with a fly-flap : that 
is the lovers' kisses." A still more drastic 
comparison is found in the German expres- 
sion, *' the kiss sounded just like when a cow 



8 THE KISS 

drags her hind hoof out of a swamp." This 
metaphor, which is used, you know, by Mark 
Twain, is as graphic as it is easy of compre- 
hension ; whereas, on the other hand, I am 
somewhat perplexed with regard to an old 
Danish expression that is to be found in the 
Ole Lade's Phrases {Fraser) : ** He kissed her 
so that it rang just as it does when one strikes 
the horns off felled cows." Another old 
author speaks of kissing that sounds as if 
one was pulling the horn out of an owl 

The emotions expressed by this more or less 
noisy lip-sound arc manifold and varying : 
burning love and affectionate friendship, 
exultant joy and profound grief, etc., etc. ; 
consequently there must be many different 
sorts of kisses. 

The austere old Rabbis only recognised three 
kinds of kisses, viz. : those of greeting, fare- 
well, and respect. The Romans had also 
three kinds, but their classification was essen- 
tially at variance with the Rabbis* : they 
distinguished between oscn/a,* friendly kisses, 
basia, kisses of love, and suavia, passionate 

♦ From osculum wc get the words osculogy, the science of 
kissing, and osculogical, that which pertains to kissing ; but the 
Greek derivations philematology and philematological are per- 
haps preferable. 



WHAT IS A KISS? 9 

kisses. The significance of these words is 
clearly expressed in the following lines : — 

Basia coniugibus, sed et oscula dantur atnicis, 
Suavia lascivis miscantur grata labellis. 

But the Romans* division is by no means 
exhaustive ; kisses are and have been 
actually employed to express many other 
feelings than those above-mentioned. 

That kisses in this book are arranged in 
five groups, viz., kisses of passion, love, peace, 
respect, and friendship, is chiefly due to 
practical considerations ; for, to be precise, 
these artificially-formed groups are inadequate, 
aiul, besides, oftcMi ovcTlap one another. 

A modern French writer reckons no less 
than twenty sorts of kisses, but I find in 
German dictionaries over thirty different desig- 
nations : Abschiedskuss, Brautkuss, Bruder- 
kuss, Dankkuss, Doppelkuss, Ehrenkuss, 
Efwiderungskuss, Feuerkuss^ Flavimenkuss, 
Frauenktiss, Freundschaftskiiss^ Frtedenskuss^ 
Gcgenktiss, Geisterkuss, Handkuss, Honigkuss^ 
InbruntskusSy Judaskuss^ Lehenskuss, Liebes- 
kuss, MddchenkusSy Minnekuss, Morgenknss, 
Miitlcrkuss, Ncbenkuss, PantoJfclkusSy Segens- 
kuss, Sifhnungskuss, UndschuUiskttss, Ver- 



10 THE KISS 

m'dhhmgskuss^ VersohnungsktisSy Wechselkuss^ 
WeihekusSy Ztu:kerku5s, etc., etc. In German 
the verb itself, **to kiss," is varied in many 
different ways, e.g.^ in Germany one may 
aukUssen, aufkUssen^ auskussen, bekUssen, 
durchkUssefiy emporkUssen, entkilssen, erkilssen^ 
fortkilssen, herkUssen^ nachkilssen, verkUssen, 
vorbeikUssen, wegkUssetiy widerkiissen^ zerkUssen^ 
zukilssen^ and zuriickkilssen. 

We must give the Germans the credit of 
being thorough, and in the highest degree 
methodical and exhaustive in their nomen- 
clature, for can wc conceive a more admir- 
able word than, for instance, nachkilssen^ 
which is explained as ''making up for kisses 
that have been omitted, or supplementing 
kisses " ? However, on the other hand, it 
cannot be denied that they are at the same 
time awkward and tasteless in their expres- 
sions ; a word such as auskUssen, which, for 
instance, is used in the refrain : Trink aus! 
Kuss aus! seems to me to smack perilously 
of the ale-house. 

We have now seen what a kiss is ; but 
before proceeding to investigate the different 
kinds of kisses, their significance in the history 
of civilisation, and treatment in poetry, it 



WHAT IS A KISS? 11 

still remains for us to reply to some of the 
ordinary queries regarding the nature and 
characteristics of the kiss. 

In the first place we must investigate the 
kiss in its gustative aspect. I here confine 
myself to what Kierkegaard calls " the perfect 
kiss," i,e., the kiss between man and woman ; 
kisses between men are, according to that 
authority, insipid. 

Kiissen^ tvo sntekt dat? see de vtaid. Yes, 
its taste naturally depends entirely on the cir- 
cumstances, and experience is here a teacher 
that sets every theory at nought ; but a few 
leading features may, however, be indicated. 

When Lars Iversen, in Schandorph s Skov- 
fogedb0rnene, has kissed Mette Splyd, he 
wipes his mouth and says, when he has got 
well outside the door, "That tasted like 
meat that has been kept too long." When 
the old minnesinger, King Wenceslaus of 
Bohemia, had kissed his sweetheart he sang: 
**Just as a rose that opens its calix when 
it drinks the sweet dew, she offered me her 
sugar-sweet red mouth." 

Recht als eiii rose diu sich uz ir klosen lat, 

Sweiiii si des siiczcn touwcs gert, 

Sus bol si mil* ir zuckersiiezcn r6len niuiil. 



12 THE KISS 

As we perceive from both these examples, 
there is a great distinction between kisses 
in their gustative aspect, but, for obvious 
reasons, I shall entirely exclude the variety 
represented by Mette Splyd. 

The most frequently employed and, at 
the same time undoubtedly the most fitting 
epithet of a kiss, is that it is sweet. The 
shepherd in the French pastorals is fond of 
asking for a sweet kiss {un doux baiser)y and 
poets innumerable, like Wenceslaus, have sung 
about the beloveds sugar mouth. During 
the Renaissance such expressions as her 
bouche sucrine (sugary mouth) and bouche 
pleine de sture et d'ambregris (mouth full 
of sugar and ambergris) were often employed. 

We find this further borne out by two 
Latin epigrams. One asks: — '*What is 
sweeter than mead ? " and the answer runs : 
** The dew of heaven. And what is sweeter 
than dew? — Honey from Hybla? What 
is sweeter than honey? — Nectar. Than 
nectar? — A kiss." 

Quid mulso praestat ? Ros coeli. Rore quid ? Hyblae 
Mel. Melle hoc ? Nectar. Hectare ? Suaviolum. 

The second epigram goes through a 



WHAT IS A KISS? 13 

similar string of comparisons, and arrives at the 

same result : ** What is better than sugar ? — 

Honey-cake. Than honey-cake ? — The flavour 

of honey-combs. Than this flavour? — Dewy 

isses — 

Saccharo quid superat? Libum. Quid libo ? Favorum 
Gustus. At hunc gustum ? Basia roscidula. 

Kisses are sweet as woman's gentle 
breath, which, according to a Roumanian 
folk-song, smells of "delicate young wine," 
or, as the French poets say, of '* thousands 
of flowers." — 

Laughing mouth, mouth to caress, 
Kissing ere its lips you press ; 
Sweet for kissing, bahny breath 
Like the perfume of fresh heath. 

W. F. H. 

A woman's breath, which intoxicates man, 

is, as it were, the ethereal expression of her 

whole being. In the description of the 

youthful Blancheflor we are told that her 

breath is so delicious and refreshing that he 

who experiences it knows not pain, and 

needs no food for a whole week. 

De sa bouche ist si douce haleine, 
Vivre en peut-on une semaine ; 
Qui au lundi le sentiroit 
En la semaine mal n^avroit. 

Moreover, as the flavour of a kiss depends 



14 THE KISS 

on the woman's mouth, let us, therefore, 
investigate how a woman's mouth ought to be 
fashioned in order to fulfil its purpose from a 
philematological point of view. When the 
mediaeval French poets describe a beautiful 
and desirable woman they say of her mouth 
that it must be ** well-formed and sweet to kiss** 
(bien faite et douce pour baiser). The trouba- 
dours likewise in their love poems praise the 
mouth that is benfaita ad obs de baisar. 

If more detailed explanations are wanted 
they can easily be given. The lips must, in 
the first place, be bewitchingly soft ; next, 
they must be as red as coral : 

Los labios de la su boca 
Como un fino coral, 

or else red as roses : 

La bocca piccioletta e colorita, 
Vermiglia come rosa di giardino, 
Piagente ed amorosa per baciare.* 

This last simile is one of the most fre- 
quently employed. The beloved one's mouth 
is likened to a rose ; it has the scent and 
colour of a rose : 



* The tiny little mouth, red as a rose 
That blossoms hidden in some garden-close. 
Pleasant and amorous through being kissed. W. F. H. 



WHAT IS A KISS? 15 

Haec dulcis in amore 
Est et plena decore, 
Rosa rubet rubore, 
Et lilium convallium 
Tota vincit odore, 

sang the wandering clerks in the Middle 
Ages, the jolly Goliards, and they extolled the 
youth who was lucky enough to kiss the 
mouth of such a woman : 

Felix est qui osculis mcllifluis 
Ipsius potitur. 

And, they went on to say, **on every 
maiden's lips the kiss sits like a rose which 
only longs to be plucked " : 

Sedit in ore 
Rosa cum pudore. 

The old German minnesingers use the 
expression Kussblilmlein (kiss-floweret), and 
a bard of the Netherlands sings : '* My be- 
loved is my summer, my beloved is my joy, 
all the roses bloom every time she gives me 

iss : 

Mijn liefken is niijn somer, 
Min liefken is mijn lust, 
En al de rosen bloejen 
So dicmael si mi cust. 

But all this is only poetry, merely feeble 
imageries which only give an entirely weak 



16 THE KISS 

idea of the reality. How accurate is Thomas 
Moore when, in one of his poems, he declares 
that roses are not so warm as his beloved s 
mouth, nor can the dew approach it in sweetness. 
Now if we turn to the other aspect of the 
case and see what women exj)ect from a 
man's kiss, then the question becomes some- 
what more difficult to treat, inasmuch as so 
exceedingly few women have treated of kisses 
in poetry — a, fact which is also in itself quite 
natural. Runeberg, who himself has so often 
sung the praises of kissing without, however, 
being versed in their nature: 

For my part Tve ne'er understood 
Of kisses what can be the good ; 
But I should die if kept away 
From thy red lips one single day. 

W. F. H. 

asks his beloved : 

Now, dearest maiden, answer me. 
What joy can kisses bring to thee ? 

W. F. H. 

But she fails to answer him : 

I ask thee now, as I asked this, 
And all thy answer's kiss on kiss, 

W. F. H. 

Besides, it seems very evident from the last 
line that the situation did not admit of the 



WHAT IS A KISS? 17 

calmer and more sober observation which 
forms the necessary condition for a reliable 
answer to the question. I am, therefore, 
obliged to attempt to reply to the question 
myself; but I readily admit my deficiency in 
the essential qualification of being able to do 
so in a satisfactory manner. Moreover, the 
literary material at my disposal is exceedingly 
inadequate, and, for that reason, I cannot claim 
any universal application for my treatment of 
the subject. 

In the first place it seems indisputable that 
a woman gives a decided preference to a man 
with a beard ; at all events a heiduke sings 
in a Roumanian ballad : " I am still too 
young to marry ; my beard has not yet 
sprouted. What married woman then will 
care about kissing me ? " 

C^ simt voinic neinsorat ; 
Nici mustete nu m'a dat : 
Cum simt bun de s^rutat 
La neveste cu barbat ? 

To judge from the part the heidukes play 
in the ballad literature of the Roumanians 
and Serbs, they must be very experienced in 
everything that has to do with women and 
love, and their testimony must therefore be 

B 



18 THE KISS 

accepted as being sufficiently reliable. Be- 
sides, we find the same taste among women 
in Northern Europe. In Germany there is 
said to be nothing in a kiss without a 
beard : Ein Ktiss ohm Bart ist einc 
Ves/>er ohvc Mac^nificat (a kiss wilhout a 
beard is like Vespers without the Magnifi- 
cat) ; or, still more strongly, Ein Kvss ohnc 
Bart ist ein Ei ohne Salz (a kiss without a 
] beard is like an ^^^ without salt). The 
young girls in Holland also incline to this 
point of view : Een kussjc zonder haard, ecu 
eitje zonder zotU (an %gg without salt), and 
they have in the Frisian Islands some who 
share their taste : An Kleeb sanner Biard as 
as en Brei sanner Salt (porridge without 
salt). Lastly, the Jutland lassies also take 
the same view of the matter — in fact they 
are, if I may say so, even more refined in 
their requirements ; a kiss is not only to 
sound, but it must have some flavour about 
it — it ought to be strong and luscious : At 
kysse en karl nden skni og skaeg cr soin at 
kysse en leret vaeg (kissing a fellow without 
a quid of tobacco and a beard is like kissing 
a clay wall), say those who express them- 
selves in the most refined manner ; but there 



WHAT IS A KISS? 19 

arc others who are not so particular in the 
choice of words, and these latter say straight 
out : A kys jeUy dee hveken r0ger eller skrder^ 
de iB som rnte ku kys (b sp(e kal i r., (kissing 
one who neither smokes nor chews tobacco is 
like kissing a new-born calf on the rump). 
On the other hand, a person should not be 
too wet about the mouth — that they do not 
like ; e.g., the scornful saying : " He is nice 
to kiss when one is thirsty," or, as the Ger- 
man girls say : Einen Ktiss mit Sauce bekom- 
men (to get a kiss with sauce). 

It apparently follows from this that women 
are not so simple in their tastes as men ; a 
kiss by itself is not sufficient, it requires 
some condiment or other in addition — and, 
for the credit of women's taste, let it be said 
— this need not always be tobacco. In a ^/ 
French folk-song the lover tells us that he has 
smeared his mouth with fresh butter so that 
it may taste better : 

J'avais toujou dans ma pochette 

Du bon bieur' frais, 
O que je me gressais la goule, 

Ouand i' Tembrassais. 

I have already mentioned in my preface 



20 THE KISS 

how dangerous the mere reading about kisses 
may be ; but, apart from literature, a kiss 
is something which has to be dealt with 
most cautiously. Now hear what Socrates 
said to Xenophon one day : " Kritobulus is 
the most foolhardy and rash fellow in the 
world ; he is rasher than if he meant to 
dance on naked sword -points or fling him- 
self into the fire : he has had the audacity 
to kiss a pretty face." — "But," asked Xeno- 
phon, "is that such a deed of daring? I 
am certainly no desperado, but still I think 
I would venture to expose myself to the 
same risk." — " Luckless wight," replied So- 
crates, "you are not thinking what would 
betide you. If you kissed a pretty face, 
would you not that very instant lose your 
freedom and become a slave? Would you 
not have to spend much money on harmful 
amusements, and would you not do much 
which you would despise, if your understand- 
ing were not clouded? Hercules forbid 
what dreadful effects a poor kiss can have! 
And dost thou marvel at it, Xenophon? 
You know, I take it, those tiny spiders which 
are not half the size of an obol, and yet 
they can, through merely touching a person s 



WHAT IS A KISS? 21 

mouth, cause him the keenest pains; nay, 
even deprive him of his understanding. But, 
by Jupiter, anyhow this is quite another 
matter ; for spiders poison the wound 
directly they inflict a sting. O, thou simple 
fellow, dost thou not know that lustful kisses 
are poisoned, even if thou failest to perceive 
the poison? Dost thou not know that she 
to whom the name of beautiful is given is a 
wild beast far more dangerous than scorpions ; 
for the latter only poison us by their touch, 
whereas beauty destroys us without actual 
contact with us, and even ejects from a long 
distance a venom so dangerous that people 
arc deprived thereby of their wits. This is 
the reason why I advise you, O Xenophon, 
to run away as fast as you can the very instant 
you see a beautiful woman, and with regard to 
yourself, O Kritobulus, I deem you will act most 
prudently in spending a whole year abroad ; 
for that is the least time necessary for curing 
thy wound."* 

It may perhaps be thought that Socrates' 
fear of kissing is a trifle exaggerated, his 
idea possibly arising from a certain prejudice 
derived from Mistress Xantippe ; anyhow, 

* Translated from the Danish Version. 



22 THE KISS 

nowadays, we regard the matter from a far 
more sober point of view. We oiight, never- 
theless, to be well on our guard against the 
frivolous opinion expressed in so many modern 
sayings, that a kiss is a thing of no conse- 
quence whatever. The Italians bluntly assert 
**that a mouth is none the worse for having 
been kissed '* {bocca baciata non perde ventura), 
and a French writer of the present day even 
goes so far as to compare a kiss with those 
usually-harmless bullets which are exchanged 
in modern duels. Bah ! deux baisers, qtiest 
que cela? On les ^change comnie des balles 
sans risultat^ et rhonneur reste satis/ait 
(Bah! two kisses. What of that.** They are 
exchanged like bullets that miss the mark, 
and honour is satisfied). 

This frivolous notion must not, however, be 
deemed peculiar to the Latin nations : it is 
to be met with even in the North. In 
Norway there is a song: 

Jens Johannesen, the Goth so brave, 
The maid on her chops a good buss gave. 
He kissed her once, and once again, 
But each time was she likewise fain, 
But each time was she likewise fain. 

W. F. H. 

As you see, the last line of the verse is 



WHAT IS A KISS? 23 

repeated as if for the purpose of duly 
impressing the moral of the song. 

It is said in Als : Et kys er et stow^ den 
der it vil ha et, ka vask et ow (a kiss is like 
a grain of dust, which any one who would be 
rid of it can wash away). We read as far 
back as Pcder Syv * : Et kys kan afviskes 
(a kiss can be washed away), but he adds 
solemnly, and for our warning : " She who 
permits a kiss also permits more ; and he 
who has access to kisses has also access to 
more." Even the Germans say : Kuss kann 
man zwar abivischen, aber das Feuer im 
Herzen nich loschen (a kiss may indeed be 
washed away, but the fire in the heart 
cannot be quenched). 

Thus hardly the shadow of a doubt ought 
to exist as to kisses being extraordinarily 
dangerous- -or, in any case, capable of becom- 
ing so — far more dangerous, for instance, than 
dynamite or gun-cotton ; in the first place, 
at any rate, inasmuch as people are not in the 
habit of walking about with such explosives in 
their pockets, whereas every one has kisses 
always at hand, or, more correctly speaking, 

* A Danish poet, philologist, and collector of proverbs 
(1631-1702). 



24 THE KISS 

in their mouths ; secondly, we are rid of 
dynamite when once it has exploded, but, on 
the other hand, we can never actually be quit 
of a kiss — without at the same time returninj^ 
it ; for we take back the kisses we give, you 
know, and we give, too, those we take back — 
and, adds the proverb, ** nobody is the loser." 
Einen Kuss den man raubt giebt man wieder 
(One returns a stolen kiss), say the Germans ; 
and the Spaniards have expressed the same 
thought in a neat little copla : " Dost thy 
mother chide thee for having given me a 
kiss? Then take back, dear girl, thy kiss, 
and bid her hold her tongue." 

I Porque un beso me has dado 
Rifte tu madre ? 
Toma, nifta, tu beso ; 
Dile que calle. 

Marot has treated the same subject in his 
epigram Le Baiser VoU, or the Stolen Kiss. 

About my daring now you grieve, 
To snatch a kiss without ado, 
Nor even saying, " By your leave." 
Come, I will make my peace with you, 
And now I want you to believe 
I'm loth your soul again to grieve 
By theft of kisses, since, alack, 
My kiss has wrought such dole and teen ; 



WHAT IS A KISS? 25 

Yet 'tis not lost ; 1*11 give it back, 
And that right blithely, too, I ween. 

W. F. H. 

There is a French anecdote of the present 
day about a student who took the liberty of 
kissing a young girl. She got very angry, 
however, and called him an insolent puppy, 
whereupon he retorted with irrefutable logic : 
Ponr Dicii ! Mademoiselle ne votis fdchez pas, 
si ce baiser vous gine, rendez-le-moi (For 
goodness' sake, don't be cross, young lady. 
If that kiss annoys you, give it back to me). 
It seems to have had a more amicable settle- 
ment in the case of a Danish couple who had 
resolved to break off their engagement: "It 
is best, I suppose, that we return each other s 
letters?" said he. '* I think so too," replied she, 
*' but shall we not at the same time give each 
other all our kisses back ? " They did so, and 
thus agreed to renew their engagement. 

This little story shows us that a kiss is 
something which cannot be so easily lost, and 
I hope, not least for the sake of my book, that 
we shall concur in the Italian proverb which 
says : Bacio dato non e mai perduto (a kiss 
once given is never lost). 



II 



LOVE KISSES 



A long, long kiss, a kiss of youth and love 
And beauty, all concentrating like rays 

Into one focus, kindled from above ; 
Such kisses as belong to early days, 

Whcro hcarl, aiul soul, and s<m»so, in <*()n<*crl move. 
And llie blood's lav.'i, and llic pulse a blaze, 

Each kiss a heart-quake, — for a kiss's strength 

I think, it must be reckoned by its length. 

BVRON. 



CHAPTER II 



LOVE KISSES 



'*y\T the time of the worlds creation kisses 
were created and cruel love." Thus begins 
a Cypriot folk-song, and it is assuredly with- 
out the shadow of a doubt that among all 
nations which on the whole know kissing, it 
gets its sublimest meaning as the expression 
of love. 

In the transport of love the lovers' lips seek 
each other. When Byron's Don Juan wanders 
one evening along the shore with his Haidee, 
they glance at the moonlit sea which lies out- 
spread before them, and they listen to the lap- 
ping of the waves and the whispering murmur 
of the breeze, but suddenly they 

Saw each other's dark eyes darting light 
Into each other — and, heholding this, 
Their Hps drew near, and clung into a kiss. 

20 



30 THE KISS 

They had not spoken, but they felt allured, 

As if their souls and lips each other beckoned, 
Which, being joined, like swarming bees they clung — 
Their hearts the flowers from whence the honey sprung. 

The kiss of love is the exultant message 
of the longing of love, love eternally young, 
the burning prayer of hot desire, which is born 
on the lovers' lips, and "rises," as Charles Fuster 
has said, "up to the blue sky from the green 
plains," like a tender, trembling thank-offering. 

Que tons les cocurs soient apais6s 

Et toutes les levres ouvertes, 
Qu'un fr^missement de baisers 

Monte au ciel bleu des plaines vertes ! 

The love kiss, rich in promise, bestows 
an intoxicating feeling of infinite happiness, 
courage, and youth, and therefore surpasses 
all other earthly joys in sublimity — at any rate 
all poets say so — and no one has expressed it 
in more exquisite and choicer words than 
Alfred de Musset in his celebrated sonnet on 
Tizianello : 

Beatrix Donato was the soft sweet name 

Of her whose earthly form was shaped so fair ; 

A faithful heart lay in her breast's white frame, 
Her spotless body held a mind most rare. 



LOVE KISSES 31 

The son of Titian, for her deathless fame. 
Painted this portrait, witness of love's care, 

And from that day renounced his art's high claim, 
Loth that another dame his skill should share. 

Stranger, if in your heart love doth ahide, 
Gaze on my lady's picture ere you chide. 

Say if perchance your lady's fair as this. 
Then mark how poor a thing is fame on earth ; 
Grand as this portrait is, it is not worth — 

Believe me on my oath — the model's kiss. 

W. F. H. 

Thus even the highest work of art, yea, the 
loftiest reputation, is nothing in comparison 
with the passionate kiss of a woman one 
loves. This is what life has taught Musset, 
and a half melancholy sigh rings through his 
exultation over the omnipotence of love. In 
turning to the more natve speech of popular 
poetry, we find in a German Schnaderhilpfel 
(Improvisation) a corresponding homage to the 
kiss as the noblest thing in the world : 

My sweetheart's poor. 

But fair to behold. 
What use were wealth ? 

I cannot kiss gold. 

W. F. H. 

And we all yearn for kisses and we all seek 
them; it is idle to struggle against this passion. 
No one can evade the omnipotence of the kiss, 



/_ 



32 THE KISS 

the best resolutions, the most solemn oaths, are 
of no avail. A pretty little Servian folk-song* 
treats of a young girl who swore too hastily. 

Yestreen swore a maiden fair, 
Ne*cr again Pll wear a garland, 
Ne'er again I'll wear a garland, 
Wine again J 'II never drink, 
Never more Fll kiss a laddie. 

Yestreen swore the maiden fair, 

Clean to-day her oath's regretted : 

If I decked myself with flow'rets, 

Then the flow'rets made me fairer ; 

If I quaffed the wine that's ruddy, 

Then my heart grew all the blither ; 

If I kissed my heart's beloved, 

Life to me grew doubly dearer.* W. F. H. 

It is through kisses that a knowledge of life 
and happiness first comes to us. Runeberg 
says that the angels rejoice over the first kiss 
exchanged by lovers. 

The evening star was silling beside a silver cloud, 

A maid from out a twilight grove addressed this star 

aloud, 

"Come, tell me, star of evening, what angels think in 

heaven 
When by a youth and maiden the first sweet kiss is 

given ? " 
And heaven's bashful daughter was heard to deign reply: 
**0n earth the choir of angels bright look down from 

out the sky, 

• This and most of the following Servian ballads were trans- 
lated by Prof. Nyrop into Danish from the German version of 
O. P. Ritto. 



LOVE KISSES 33 

And see their own felicity then mirrored on the earth. 
But death sheds tears^ and turns his eyes away from such 
blest mirth." 

W. F. H. 

Only death weeps over the brief duration 
of human happiness, weeps because the bliss 
of the kiss endures not for ever. And likewise, 
even after death, lovers kiss. Jannakos and 
Helena, his plighted bride, die before their 
wedding day. They die in a kiss and are 
buried together; but over their grave grew a 
cypress and an orange tree, and the latter 
stretched forth its branches on high and 
kissed the cypress. 

The happiest man is the man who has the 
kiss. In the Greek romance of Babylonika^ 
which was attributed to Jamblicus, who lived 
in the second century of the Christian era, 
three lovers contend for the favour of a young 
maid. To one she has given the cup out of 
which she was wont to drink ; the second she 
has garlanded with flowers that she herself has 
worn ; to the third she has given a kiss. 
Borokos is called on as judge to decide as to 
which has enjoyed the highest favour, and he 
unhesitatingly decides the dispute in favour of 
the last. 

The same subject is often the theme of 



34 THE KISS 



d4 inct A.ias 

folk-poetry, and the verdict never alters ; the 
joy bestowed by a kiss surpasses all other joys. 
A Hungarian ballad runs thus : 

As the hart holds dear the fountain , 
And the bee the honied flow'rets, 
So the noble grape I cherish ; 
After this songs melting, tender, 
Kisses, too, of lips of crimson, 
As thine own, O Cenzi mine. 

But the wine's might fires my senses, 
And songs wake within me blitheness. 
And with love intoxicated. 
With thy love, mine own belovM. 
And my heart no more is longing 
After purple, after gew-gaws> 
After what the others long for. 

Happy am I in the clinking 
Of the goblet filled with rich wine ; 
Happier still amidst sweet singing ; 
But my happiness were greatest, 
Dared I press my kisses on a 
Mouth, and that mouth only thine. 

W. F. H. 



The same idea is still more delicately ex- 
pressed in the following Servian ballad : 

Proudly cried a golden orange 
On the breezy shore : 
'* Certainly nowhere happiness 
Is found to equal mine.*' 



LOVE KISSES 35 

Answered a green apple 
From its apple tree : 
" Fool to boast, golden orange, 
On the breezy shore ; 
For happiness such as I've found, 
Its like cannot be seen." 

Then said the breezy meadow. 
As yet untouched by scythe : 
** Too conceited, little apple^ 
That speech of thine, meseems, 
For happiness such as IWe found. 
Its like cannot be seen." 

Then spake a lovely maiden. 
Unsullied by a kiss : 
" Thou pratest folly, grass-plot. 
Instead of sooth, I ween. 
For happiness such as I've found 
Its like cannot be seen." 

But a handsome lad made answer 
To every speech they made ; 
** YouVe mad, all mad, to utter 
Such words as I've just heard. 
For no one in the universe 
Can be so blest as I." 

" Golden orange by the breezy 
Shore I pluck thee now. 
Apple, from thy apple tree 
To-day V\l shake thee down. 
Grass-plot, I'll mow thee level 
With my scythe-strokes to-day. 
Maiden, as yet unsullied, 
To-day I'll kiss thy lips." 

W. F. H. 



36 THE KISS 

In another Servian lay, the lover sings 
that he would rather kiss his sweetheart 
than be the Sultans guest. In Spain the 
lover wishes he were the water-cooler so that 
he might kiss his darlings lips when she 
is drinking : 

Arcarrasa de tu casa, 
Chiquiya, quisiera ser, 
Para besarte los labios 
Quando fueras A beber. 

The Greeks say that the kiss is ** the 
key to Paradise*'; yea, it is Paradise itself, 
declares Wergeland : 

Nay, bride, thine embrace more than heav'n I prize ; 
Oh, kiss me once more that to heav'n I rise. 

W. F. H. 

The kiss is a preservation against every 
ill. ** No ill-luck can betide me when she 
bestows on me a kiss," sings the old trouv^re, 
Colin Muset : 

Se de li ai un douz baisier 
Ne me porroit nus nials venir. 

It gives health and strength, adds 
Heine : 

Yet could I kiss thee, O my soul, 

Then straightway I should be made whole. 

W. F. H. 



LOVE KISSES 37 

It carries life with it ; it even bestows 
the gift of eternal youth — if one can believe 
the words of the Duke of Anhalt the 
minnesinger : 

Your mouth is crimson ; over its sweet portal 
A kindly Genius seems for ever flowing. 
If on that mouth a kiss I were bestowing, 

Methinks I should in sooth become immortal. 

W. F. H. 

The Persians, too, had the same idea. 
The jovial Hafiz laments that "sour wisdom 
added to old age and virtue" has laid waste 
his strength, but a remedy is to be found 
for these : 

" Come and drink," the maiden whispered, 

** Sin and sweetness, youthful folly, 
Lovingly from lips of crimson, 
From my bosom's lily chalice, 
And live on with strength redoubled." 

W. F. H. 

And if a kiss is no good, then nought 
avails. In another passage the same bard 
says, that were he suddenly on some occa- 
sion to feel himself tormented by agony and 
unrest, no one is to give him bitter medicine — 
for such he detests — but : 

Hand me the foaming juice of the vine. 
Jest and sing from your heart to mine, 



38 THE KISS 

And if these prove not a remedy sure. 

Then a pair of red lips you must straight procure. 

But if these latter avail not to save, 
May I be laid deep down in the grave. 

W. F. H. 

In the case of lovers a kiss is everything; 
that is the reason why a man stakes his all 
for a kiss. In Enthousiastne Aarestrup 
3ays: 

Ha, you're blushing-! What red roses 
Deck your lips ! A man were fain to, 
If a chasm yawned before him, 
Straightway peril life to gain you. 

W. F. H. 

And man craves for it as his noblest 
reward : 

From beyond the high green mountains 
Lamentations fraught with sadness 
Issue, soft as from a girl's voice. 
Then a youth the sound pursueth, 
And he sees a maiden shackled 
Fast in fetters thick of roses. 

Then the fair maid called unto him : 
*' Doughty youth, come here and help me ; 
V\\ be to you as a sister." 

But the youth straightway made answer : 
"In my home I have a sister." 

" Doughty youth, come here and help me, 
For a brother-in-law Til choose thee." 



LOVE KISSES 39 

Then the lad again made answer : 
" In my home I have that title." 

'^ Come, young hero, and assist me, 
And ril be thy heart's beloved." 

Quickly kissed he then the maiden 
Ere he loosed her from her fetters, 
Then went homeward with his bride. 

W. F. H. 

Thus runs a Servian ballad, and innumer- 
able analogues to it are to be found in the 
folk-lore of other countries, in ballads as well 
as tales. It is, you know, for a kiss from the 
princess's lovely mouth that the swine-herd 
sells his wonderful pan. 

But women are aware, too, of the witchery 
that dwells on their lips, and the power 
that lies in their kiss. According to a 
remarkable saga which forms the subject of 
one of Heine s poems, King Harald H^rfager 
sits at the bottom of the sea in captivity to a 
mermaid. The king's head is reposing on 
her bosom ; but, suddenly, a violent tremor 
thrills him, he hears the Viking shouts which 
reach him from above, he starts from his 
dream of love and groans and sighs : 

And then the King from the depth of his heart 
Begins sobbing, and wailing, and sighing. 

When quickly the water-fay over hini bends, 
With loving kisses replying. 



ii) THE KISS 

Man is the slave of the kiss ; by a kiss 
woman tames the fiercest man ; by nic<ins of 
a kiss man's will becomes as wax. Our 
peasant girls in Denmark know this, too, 
right well When they want one of the lads 
to do them a service they promise him '* seven 
sweet kisses and a bit of white sugar on 
Whitsunday morning." ** But he will get 
neither/' they say to themselves. 

Now, as we have discussed the kiss and 
\iH iniporlancc as the direct expression of 
love and croiic emotions, we will pass over to 
certain more special aspects of its nature. 

In the very first place, then, we have the 
(|uantitative conditions. 

It is a matter of common knowledge that 
lovers are liberal in the extreme in the ques- 
tion of kisses, which arc given and taken to 
infinity^ and these have likewise continually 
the same intoxicating freshness as at the 
first meeting. Everything in love is, you 
know, u reiteration, and yet love is a j^r- 
|H^tual a^H^wing, How inspiriting are the 
wonls of Tox'c to King Waldemar, as J. P. 
luooUson ^ivos them : 

Aik) now 1 sty fv^r the tin>t time : 
*^ Kiiig Yohner, 1 low thee," 



LOVE KISSES 41 

And kiss thee now for the first time, 
And fling mine arms round thee ; 

But should you say I've said this before, 
And you to kisses are fain, 

Then say I : " King, he's but a fool 

Who minds such trifles vain." 

W. F. H. 

What has a love kiss to do with the law 
of renewal? That one does not arrive at 
anything by one kiss is expressed with suffi- 
cient plainness in an Istro-Rounianian proverb : 
Cit tm trat busni mt se afla muliere (with a 
single kiss no woman is caught). 

This maxim holds good besides in the 
case of both men and women. But how 
many kisses are necessary then } 

There is a little Greek folk-song called 
**A11 good things are three." It runs as 
follows : 

Your first kiss brought me near to the grave, 
Your second kiss came my life to save ; 
But if a third kiss youUl bestow. 
Not even death can bring me woe. 

W. F. 11. 

But, nevertheless, we may assume without 
a shadow of a doubt that he was not satisfied 
with these three kisses — lovers are not wont 
to be so easily contented. The Spaniards 
and many other nations besides say of lovers 
that ** they eat each other up with kisses;" 



42 THE KISS 

but more than three are certainly required for 
that purpose: 

Take this kiss and a thousand more, my darling, 

W. F. H. 

sings Aarestrup, but Catullus outbids him, 

however, in one of his songs to Lesbia : 

A thousand kisses ; add five score : 
Another thousand kisses more ; 

Then best forget them all, 
Lest any wight with evil eye 
Our too close counting might espy, 

And dire mishap befall.* W. F. H. 

As we see, Catullus love has no trifling start 
over Aarestrup's, and so a later poet seems 
likewise to think that even his demands are 
quite ridiculously small. ** Nay," says Joachim 
du Bellay to his Columbelle, "give me as many 
kisses as there are flowers on the mead, seeds 
on the field, and grapes in the vineyards, and 
so that you shall not deem me ungrateful, I 
will immediately give you as many again." 

Du Bellay, moreover, bitterly upbraids the 
poet of Verona for asking for so few kisses 
that they can, when taken together, be counted : 

In truth Catullus' wants are small. 
And little can they really mean. 
Since he could even count them all. 

W. F. H. 

* From "Various Verses," 1893. 



LOVE KISSES 43 

I must, however, take Catullus' part to a 
certain extent; he is not so precise in his 
demands of Lesbia as Uu Bellay makes out ; 
in another poem he asks her: 

Thy kisses dost thou bid me count, 
And tell thee, Lesbia, what amount 
My rage for love and thee could tire. 
And satisfy and cloy desire ? 

And the answer runs : 

Many as grains of Libyan sand 

Upon Cyrene*s spicy land 

From prescient Ammon's sultry dome 

To sacred Battus* ancient tomb ; 

Many as stars that silent ken 

At night the stolen loves of men. 

Yes, when the kisses thou shalt kiss 

Have reached a number vast as this, 

Then may desire at length be stayed. 

And e'en my madness be allayed : 

Then when infinity defies 

The calculations of the wise ; 

Nor evil voice's deadly charm, 

Can work the unknown number harm. 

This being the case, it is a divine bless- 
ing that, according to the Finnish saying, 
"the mouth is not torn by being kissed, nor 
the hand by being squeezed " : 

Suu ei kulu suudellessa, 
Kasi katta annellessa. 



44 THE KISS 

But even if the mouth is not exactly torn, 
yet much kissin<j^ may be ahiiost harmful ; 
but there is only one remedy to be found for 
this — "you must heal the hurts by fresh 
kisses." 

Dorat, who may be regarded as a high 
authority on philematology, expressly says : 

A second kiss can physic 
The evil the first has wrought. 

W. F. H. 

And Heine, whose authority in these ques- 
tions should hardly be inferior, holds quite 
the same theory : 

If you have kissed my lips quite sore, 

Then kiss them whole again ; 
If we till evening meet no more, 

Then hurry will be vain. 

You have still yet the whole, whole night, 

My dearest heart, know this : 
One can in such a long, long night, 

Kiss much and taste much bliss. 

I make use of the last of the verses 
quoted as a transition to the next question 
we have to investigate, viz., the qualitative 
aspect of kissing, as I regard it apart from 
its merely gustative qualities, which have 
already been considered. 



LOVE KISSES 45 

The love kiss gleams like a cut diamond 
with a thousand hues ; it is eternally chang- 
ing as the sun s shimmer on the waves, and 
expresses the most diverse states and moods, 
ranging from humble affection to burning 
desire. 

The love kiss *' quenches the fire of the 
lips," quells and stills longing and desire, but 
it also burns and arouses regret. Margaret 
sits at her spinning-wheel, and, in tremu- 
lous longing, calls to mind Faust's ardent 
kiss : 

My peace is gone, 

My heart is sore : 
'Tis gone for ever 

And evermore. 

And the magic flow 

Of his talk, the bliss 
In the clasp of his hand, 

And, oh, his kiss I 

My bosom yearns 

For him alone ; 
Ah, dared I clasp him, 

And hold, and own I 

And kiss his mouth, 

To heart's desire. 
And on his kisses 

At last expire I 



46 THE KISS 

Numberless poets have varied the theme 
of the quenching yet burning kisses of 
love. 

O'er me flows in streams delicious 
Kisses' rosy and glowing rain, 

W. F. H. 

sings Waldemar at his meeting with Tove, 
and Aarestrup laments : 

In vain I'm seeking 

In eVry land, 
Thy sweetness burning 

Of mouth and hand. 

W. F. H. 

This "burning sweetness" seems to be an 
indubitable characteristic of a genuine love 
kiss ; we even find it again in Heine : 

The world's an ass, the world can't see, 

Thy character not knowing. 
It knows not how sweet thy kisses be, 

How rapturously glowing. 

The emotions consequent on the first kiss 
have been described in the old naive, but, 
nevertheless, exceedingly delicate love-story, 
of Daphnis and Chloe. As a reward Chloe 
has bestowed a kiss on Daphnis — an innocent 
young-maid's kiss, but it has on him the 
effect of an electrical shock : 



i 



LOVE KISSES 47 

"Ye gods, what are my feelings. Her 
lips are softer than the rose's leaf, her mouth 
is sweet as honey, and her kiss inflicts on 
me more pain than a bee's sting. I have 
often kissed my kids, I have often kissed my 
lambs, but never have I known aught like 
this. My pulse is beating fast, my heart 
throbs, it is as if I were about to suffocate, 
yet, nevertheless, I want to have another 
kiss. Strange, never-suspected pain! Has 
Chloe, I wonder, drunk some poisonous 
draught ere she kissed me? How comes it 
that she herself has not died of it?" 

Impelled, as it were, by some irresistible 
force, Daphnis wanders back to Chloe; he 
finds her asleep, but dares not awake her : 
** See how her eyes slumber and her mouth 
breathes. The scent of apple-blossoms is 
not so delicious as her breath. But I dare 
not kiss her. Her kiss stings me to the 
heart, and drives me as mad as if I had eaten 
fresh honey." Daphnis* fear of kisses dis- 
appears, however, later on, directly his 
simplicity has made room for greater self- 
consciousness. That a kiss is like the sting 
of a bee, or pains like a wound, is a 
metaphor which many poets have used, and 



48 THE KISS 

the metaphor comes undoubtedly near the 
truth. With growing passion, kisses become 
mad and violent : 

Thy ruby lips, they kissed so wild, 
So madly, so soul-disturbing ; 

W. F. H. 

and such kisses leave marks behind them. 
Aarestrup's mistress has beautiful plump 
shoulders : 

They curve, as of a goddess, 
So naked and so bold. 

I'll brand your comely shoulders, 
Such guerdon have they earned ! 

Look where my lips enfevered 
Have scars of crimson burned. 

W. F. H. 

Mafiz' mistress is afraid that **his too 

hot kisses will char her delicate lips." With 
continually increasing desire kisses grow 
more and more voluptuous, and assume 
forms which have been celebrated by poets 
of antiquity and the Renaissance. Many 
burning, erotic verses have been composed on 
the subject columbatim labra conserere^ or 
kissing as doves kiss. 



LOVE KISSES 49 

Kisses at last grow into bites. Mirabeau, 
in a love-letter to Sophie, writes : " I am 
kissing you and biting you all over, et 
jalottx de ta blancheur je te couvre de 
sufons'' ; and the classic poets often speak 
of the tiny red marks on cheeks or lips, neck 
or shoulders, which the lovers' morsiuncuUe 
have left behind. 

Arethusa writes to Lycas : " What keeps 
you till now so long away from me? Oh, 
suffer no young girl to print the mark of her 
teeth on your neck." The Italians use the 
expression baciare co' denti (kiss with the 
teeth) to signify "to love." We can only 
treat these kisses as a sort of transitional 
link, of shorter or longer duration, according 
to circumstances. They arc, as it were, **a 
sea fraught with perils," which in Mile, de 
Scudery s celebrated letter (la carte de tendre), 
carries one to strange countries {les terres 
inconnues) \ but, as these countries lie out- 
side the regions of pure philematology, I 
shall not pursue my investigations further. 
I will, however, first quote what old Ovid 
has written, although I am not at all prepared 
to assert that his opinion is entitled to have 

any special weight, more especially as it is 

D 



50 THE KISS 

far from being unimpeachable from a moral 
point of view : 

Oscula qui sumpsit, si non et cetera sumet, 
Haec quoque quae data sunt perdere dignus erit. 

Quantum defuerat pleno post oscula voto ? 
Heu mihi rusticitas, non pudor ille fiiit.* 

After the foregoing it would seem super- 
fluous to enter into a closer investigation of — 
if the term be allowed — the topographical 
aspects of kissing. The love kiss is, as you 
are aware, properly directed towards the 
mouth — a fact sufficiently known, and in 
testimony of which I have, moreover, brought 
forward a number of passages from respect- 
able and trustworthy writers. I shall only 
add a German " Sinngedicht *' of Friedrich 
von Logau : 

If you will kiss, then kiss the mouth, 
All other sorts are but half blisses, 

The face — ah, no — nor hand, neck, breast, 
The mouth alone can give back kisses. 

W. F. H. 

Von Logau's vindication of the mouth as 
the only place that ought to be kissed is 

* He who a kiss has snatched and takes naught more, 
Deserves to lose the kiss he has in store, 
How much was lacking to my perfect bliss ? 
Not modesty but clownishness was this. 

W. F. 11. 



LOVE KISSES 51 

extremely logical, and, I take it, from a 
purely theoretical point of view, unobjec- 
tionable; but, practically, the case is quite 
the contrary. The royal trottvlre, Thibaut 
de Champagne, treats in a lengthy poem — 
one of the so-called jeux-partis — the question 
whether one should kiss ones mistress's 
mouth or feet. Baudouin's opinion is in 
favour of kissing her on the mouth, and he 
gives his reasons for it at some length ; but 
Thibaut replies, that he who kisses his 
darling on the mouth has no love for her, 
because that is the way one kisses any little 
shepherdess one comes across ; it is only by 
kissing her feet that a lover shows his affec- 
tion, and it is by such means alone that her 
favour is to be won. 

The question of feet or mouth is threshed 
out minutely by the two contending parties, 
who at last agree in the opinion that one 
ought to kiss both parts, beginning with 
the feet and ending with the mouth. 

It cannot be denied that Thibaut de 
Champagne has a far better insight into 
the matter than Von Logau, and yet even 
the old French poet's point of view must be 
characterised as being somewhat narrow. 



52 THE KISS 

All the other poets, you must know, teach 
us that not only the mouth, but every part 
of our sweetheart's body says, "Kiss me," 

Friends, if it only were my fate ! 

If fate would will it so, 
I'd kiss her beauties small and great 

From bosom down to toe. 

W. F. H. 

So sings Aarestrup, and he returns again 
and again to the same idea in his ritorneller: 

When scarce the mouth can longer feel such fooling, 

Because thy lips are all too hotly burning, 
Press Ihcni to bosom \s Alpine snows for cooling. 

The arms so white and tender woo caresses ; 

A lovely pleasance, too, those plump white shoulders ! 
But through the soul a bosom-kiss straight presses. 

Her snow-white shoulders ! All what may be said on 

Such beauty I have uttered. For my guerdon 
Grant me one now to rest my weary head on. 

At kisses pressed upon your neck's fair closes 

You thrilled and threw your head back, and I 
straightway 
Planted upon your throat my kisses' roses. 

About my darling I am wheeling, flying, 

Like to a gadfly round a lily's chalice, 

Buzzing until in nectar-cup mute dying. 

W. F. H. 

Allow me also to call your attention to a 
pretty little myth which Dorat composed 



LOVE KISSES 53 

about a *'kiss in the bosom's Alpine snow." 
The kiss is a fair rose, and roses bloom 
everywhere in these tracks ; through witch- 
craft two vigorous rosebuds sprouted forth 
on woman's white bosom: 

Le bouton d'un beau sein est eclos du baiser ; 
Une rose y fleurit pour y inarquer sa trace ; 
Fier de I'avoir fait naitrci il aime k s*y fixer. 

But if the object of one s affection is not 
within reach, and oscula corporalia are, for 
that reason, practically impossible, her image 
may be kissed, as a French song naively 
says : 

I will make a portrait gay, 
Like lo Ihcc, set in a locket ; 

Kiss it five score times a day 
Guard it safely in my pocket. 

W. F. H. 

But if one is not fortunate enough to 
possess an image of the object of one's affec- 
tion, then anything that has in any way been 
associated with, or is reminiscent of, him or 
her may be kissed. Tovelille exults to King 
Volmer : 

For all my roses I've kissed to death 
Whilst thinking, dear love, of thee. 

W. F. H. 



54 THE KISS 

But F. RUckert sings with pain and 
mockery : 

With fervour the hard stone Vm kissing, 
For your heart is as hard as a stone. 

W. F. H. 

Such oscula impropria are often mentioned 
by ancient as well as modern poets. Pro- 
pertius (I. i6) says: 

Ah, oft I've hither sped with verse to greet 
Thee, leaning on thy steps with kisses pressed. 

How often, traitress, turning towards the street, 
Tve laid in secret garlands on thy crest. 

W. F. H. 

Eighteen hundred years afterwards Dorat 
writes : 

I kiss the kindly blades of grass 

Because they have approached your charms : 
The sands o*er which your footsteps pass, 

And leafy boughs that stretched their arms 

To hide our happiness, dear lass. 

W. F. H. 

Lovers often send each other kisses through 
the air, as in B6ranger's well-known song on 
the detestable Spring : 

We loved before we ever met ; 
Our kisses crossed athwart the air. 

W. F. H. 

But should the distance be too great for 
such a platonic interchange of kisses, certain 



LOVE KISSES 55 

small, obliging postilions d' amour are em- 
ployed. Heine uses his poems for that 
purpose : 

O would that all my verses 
Were kisses light and sweet : 

I'd send them all in secret 

My sweetheart's checks to greet. 

While the young girl in Runeberg has re- 
course to a rose that has just blossomed : 

Through the grove amidst the blooming flow'rets 
Walked the bonnie maiden unattended, 
And she plucked a new-born rose, exclaiming : 
* Lovely flow'ret, if you'd only wings on, 
1 would send you to my well-beloved 
When I'd fastened just two tiny greetings 
Lightly on your right wing and your left wing ; 
One should bid him cover you with kisses, 
And the other send you back to me soon.' 

W. F. H. 

But however much poets may clothe with 
grace such kisses sent and received by post — 
and it cannot be denied that many of them are 
extraordinarily charming from a poetical point 
of view — they are, and must be, nevertheless, 
in reality only certain mean substitutes with 
which lovers in the long run cannot feel fully 
satisfied. '*The kiss," says the practical 
Frenchmen, "is a fruit which one ought to 
pluck from the tree itself*' (Z^ baiser est un 



5G THE KISS 

fruit qvHil faut ctteilUr sur farbre). Kisses 
ought to be given, as they should be taken, 
in secret ; only in such case have they their 
full freshness, their intoxicating power. Heine 
says of such : 

Kisses that one steals in darkness, 
And in darkness then returns — 

How such kisses fire the spirit. 
If with ardent love it burns ! 

No profane eyes should see them : they only 
concern the pair of lovers — none other in the 
whole world. Secrecy and silence must rest 
over these kisses, as over all else that regards 
the soul of love, so that the butterfly's wings 
may not lose their delicate down. 

The strait-laced Cato degraded a senator 
of the name of Manilius for having kissed 
his wife in broad daylight and in his 
daughter's presence. Plutarch, however, con- 
siders the punishment excessive, but adds : 
** How disgusting it is in any case to kiss in 
the presence of third parties." Clement of 
Alexandria, one of the Fathers of the Church, 
endorses this opinion, and exhorts all married 
people to refrain from kissing one another 
before their servants. 

All delicate - minded persons must un- 



LOVE KISSES 57 

doubtedly sympathise with the ancient ascetic 
conception in proportion as they unconsciously 
follow it in practice. A kiss to or from a 
woman we love is a far too delicate 
pledge of affection to bear the gaze of 
strangers. 

How many engaged couples would, do you 
suppose, find favour in Cato's eyes? How 
often do they not by their behaviour offend 
the commonest notions of decency? Their 
kisses and caresses, which ought to be their 
secret possession, they expose quite uncon- 
cernedly to the sight of all One evening at 
a large party I saw a young girl ostentatiously 
kiss on the mouth the gentleman to whom she 
was engaged. Cato would certainly turn in 
his grave if he knew that such immodest 
behaviour was actually tolerated by people 
of refinement and position ; and how disgusted 
and indignant he would be — unless, indeed, 
he preferred to smile — at the sight of the duty- 
kisses after dinner, which are often exchanged 
between man and wife at dinner-parties. Ah, 
yes, when the belly's full. . . . ! How war- 
ranted is Kierkegaard's satire on the conjugal 
domestic kiss with which husband and wife, 
in lack of a napkin, wipe each other's mouth 



58 TFIE KISS 

after meals. On the lips of youth alone you 
reap the sweetest harvests : 

Sur les l^vres de la jeunesse 
Tu fais les plus douces moissons. 

(Dor at). 

The young maiden will only give her love- 
kiss to her sweetheart, the stalwart swain ; 
an old suitor is spurned with scorn. The 
lovely Mara, white and red, walked by the 
spring and tended her sheep: 

See an old, old suitor comes riding up on horseback, 
Shouting : " God's peace be thine, fair Mara, white and 

red. 
Tell me, canst thou offer me a draught of cold clear 

water ; 
Tell me, can the basil ever verdant here be gathered, 
And may I snatch a kiss from thee, fair Mara, white and 

red ? " W. F. H. 

But straightway comes the answer from 
fair Mara, white and red : 

'* I charge thee, old, old suitor, to horse and ride hence 

quickly. 
No drink is here thy portion from the fountain cold and 

clear, 
And the ever -verdant basil by thee shall not be 

gathered, 
Nor durst thou snatch a kiss from me, fair Mara, white and 

red.»' W. F. H. 



LOVE KISSES 59 

Again, fair Mara, white and red, walked by 
the spring and tended her sheep : 

See n young and handsome suitor conies riding up on 

horseback, 
Sliouting : " God's peace be thine, fair Mara, white and 

red. 
Tell me, canst thou offer me a draught of cold clear water ; 
Tell me, can the basil ever verdant here be gathered, 
And may I snatch a kiss from thee, fair Mara, white and 

red?" W. F. H. 

But Straightway comes the answer from fair 
Mara, white and red : 

*' I charge thee, handsome laddie, to horse and ride hence 
quickly, 

Wouldst thou drink of this cool fountain, thou must 
hither come some morning. 

For cold and dear's the water in the hours of early dawn. 

Woutdsl thou gather from the bushes, thou must hither 
come at mid-day. 

For the flower-trees smell the sweetest about the noon- 
tide hour. 

Wouldst thou kiss the beauteous Mara, then hither come 
at evening. 

At evening sighs each maiden who finds herself alone." 

W. F. H. 

In another Servian ballad we find the same 
glorification of the stalwart young lover, the 
same contempt for, and detestation of, old men 
who go a-wooing. 

High upon a mountain's slope once stood a maiden, 
Mirroring her lovely image in the stream. 



60 THE KISS 

And her image in these words addressing : 
* Image fraught to me with so much sadness 
Had I known a time was ever coming 
When thou shouldst be kissed by agM lover, 
Then amidst the green hills I had wandered, 
Gathering with my hands their bitter herbage, 
Squeezing out of it its acrid juices, 
Washed thee then therewith that thou should'st savour 
Bitterly wheresoe'r the old man kissed thee.' 

' O my lovely image, had I known that 
Thou wert fated for a young man's kisses, 
I had hurried to the verdant meadows, 
Gathered all the roses in the meadows, 
Squeezing from the roses their sweet juices, 
Laved thee with them, O mine image, that thou 
Savoured of fragrance wheresoe'r he kissed thee.' 

W. F. H. 

A kiss must be given and taken in frank, 
joyous affection. To have recourse to violence 
is unknightly, unlovely, and despicable in the 
highest degree. This is a sphere vrherein 
the brutal axiom regarding the right of the 
stronger can never hold good. An Albanian 
folk-song tells us of a young man who is 
in search of a young maiden with whom he is 
in love ; he finds her at a brook, and, against 
her will, kisses her mouth and cheeks. Filled 
with shame, the young maiden tries to wash 
away the kisses in the brook, but its water 
is dyed red, and "when the women in the 



LOVE KISSES 61 

neighbouring village come thither to wash their 
clothes, the latter turn red instead of white. 
And, in the gardens watered with water from 
the brook, scarlet flowers sprout up; and the 
birds which drank of the water thereof lost 
their power of song." 

This ballad shows us, in burning words, how 
deeply a man outrages a woman when he 
kisses her against the dictates of her heart. 
A Southern imagination alone can find an 
expression so sublime and poetical : in French 
it runs simply and frankly : Un baiser nest 
rien, quand le coeur est muet. In Teutonic 
countries it is expressed somewhat more 
awkwardly. In Denmark [Xioplc say: Kys 
vied gevalt er <eg uden salt (a kiss snatched by 
force is as an egg without salt) ; and in 
Germany still less elegantly : Ein aufgezwung- 
ener Kuss ist wie ein Hilhneraug am Fuss 
(like a corn on one s foot). 

The question of kissing by main force can 
be treated not only from an ethical, but also 
from a juristic point of view. Holberg relates 
that in Naples the individual who kissed in 
the street a woman against her will was 
punished by not being allowed to approach 
within thirty miles distance of the spot where 



62 THE KISS 

the outrage had taken place; and a German 
jurist wrote in the end of the eighteenth century, 
a minute and extremely solid treatise on the 
remedy that a woman has against a man who 
kisses her against her will {Van dem Rechte 
des Frauenzimmcrs gegen eine Mannpersmi, 
die es wider seinen Willen kilsset). The author 
begins by classifying kisses ; he distinguishes 
between lawful and unlawful kisses, and frames 
the following classification : — 

Kisses are either 

1. — Lawful, 

A. As spiritual kisses. 

B. As kisses of reconciliation and kisses of 

peace. 

C. As customary kisses ; partly, 

a. By way of salutation. 

1. At meeting. 

2. On arrival. 

3. At departure ; partly, 

b. As mark of courtesy. 

c. In jest. 

D. As kisses of respect. 

E. As kisses on festive occasions. 

F. As kisses of love : 

a. Between married people. 



LOVE KISSES 63 

j8. Between such as are engaged to be 

married, 
y. Between parents and children. 
8. Between relations. 
€. Between intimate friends ; or, 

II. — Unlawful, when they are given — 

A. Out of treachery or malice. 

B. Out of lust. 

After this particularly happy attempt to 
reduce kissing to a system, our jurist maintains 
the view that all depends on the person who 
kisses and the person who is kissed. 

If, for instance, a peasant or a vulgar citizen 
takes such a liberty as to kiss a noble and 
high-born lady against her will, her claim 
against the aggressor ought to be far greater 
than it would be in the case of one of less 
ignoble descent ; but, on the other hand, if 
Hans steals from his Greta "an informal, 
hearty, rustic kiss," and she complains to the 
authorities about it, there will scarcely be any 
grounds for litigation. 

On the whole, says he, a kiss between indi- 
viduals of the same position in society is not 
to be regarded as a tort, and he more closely 



64 THE KISS 

defines how he arrives at this conception. 1 1 
can only be actionable in the case of a party 
having some consciously unchaste intention 
when he kissed, or in the case of an osculum 
luxuriosum or libidinosum — in such cases only 
can a verdict be brought in of what, according 
to Roman law, is termed crimen osculatiants, 
and in no other case can the wrong-doer be 
punished by fine or imprisonment, propter vol- 
untatem pemtciosa libidinis. The punishment, 
however, should be proportioned in severity 
according to the rank of the injured party. 
In the case of a nun or a married woman 
it ought to be most severe ; less severe if the 
lady be unmarried but betrothed, and mildest 
when she is neither married nor betrothed. 

But if the unchaste intention cannot be 
distinctly proved, the woman has no grounds 
for complaining of any sort, and, in accordance 
with the procedure of the German courts, the 
kiss is to be considered innocent till the con- 
trary is proved. 

Our jurist thus takes a really liberal view in 
the case of a " kiss taken by force " ; he may 
almost be said to regard it as cine grosse 
Kleinigheit (an unimportant trifle). 

With regard to the question of a woman s 



LOVE KISSES 66 ^ 

right to defend herself in such cases, he is of 
opinion that she is justified in repulsing the 
insulter by a box on the ears, but only if the 
offence amounts to crimen osculattonis^ and 
this box on the ears may not be inflicted with 
"the fist of an Amazon," as, by such re- 
quital, she easily loses her right to take legal 
action in the matter. She must, above all, be 
careful that the box on the ears be not exces- 
sive {die Ohrfeige proportionirlich einzukleiden\ 
as otherwise the man can bring an action 
against her; consequently the woman ought 
to use her right of self-defence with great 
caution. 

Our jurist concludes with considerations of 
cases when the woman who has been kissed 
forfeits all claims, viz., when, for instance, by 
look or gestures she says, " I should like to 
see the man who would dare to kiss me," and, 
by such conduct, obviously exposes herself to 
the danger. 

Holberg has also occupied himself with this 
question, and tells the following story in one 
of his epistles (No. 199) : — 

*' Last week I was at a party where a curious 
incident happened. A person stole up to a 
lady and gave her a kiss unexpectedly. The 

E 



66 THE KISS 

Vestal virgin took this douceur in such ill part 
that, in her wrath, she gave him a sound box 
on the ears. He gave a start, and every one 
expected he was going to pay her back in the 
same coin ; but, to show his respect for the 
fair sex, he made a low bow, and kissed the 
very hand that had but lately struck him. 
All present praised this act of courtesy, on 
his part." Holberg, on the contrary, does not 
commend the man's politeness ; like the 
German jurist, he sees nothing wrong about 
a kiss — indeed, he even goes so far as to say 
that the young man ought to have given the 
maiden a box on the ears in return. This 
coarse way of looking at the subject from a 
bachelor s point of view is wittily defended in 
the following rather startling way : 

** I candidly confess that if anything of the 
kind had happened to me I should have 
returned the good lady's salutation in the 
same way, and that not out of anger or desire 
of being revenged, but for the purpose of 
showing the courtesy with which one ought 
to treat a woman; for kissing the lady 
on the hand which has boxed his ears is 
equivalent to saying : * As you are a feeble 
creature of no importance, and cannot hurt me, 



LOVE KISSES 67 

your act deserves ridicule rather than revenge 
or rage/ No sensible woman can be pleased 
with such a compliment, as there is nothing 
worse than being treated like a puppet ; and 
I hope no maid or matron will take this 
opinion of mine in ill part, but will rather 
regard it as a proof of the justice I have always 
shown to women by always taking them 
seriously. A kiss is nothing but a salutation, 
and cannot be looked on as anything else. 
We are no longer living in the golden age, 
when a young lady almost fainted at hearing 
the word pronounced." 

English ladies regard the matter from quite 
another point of view. In 1837 Mr Thomas 
Saverland brought an action against Miss 
Caroline Newton, who had bitten a piece out 
of his nose for his having tried to kiss her by 
way of a joke. The defendant was acquitted, 
and the judge laid it down that "when a 
man kisses a woman against her will she 
is fully entitled to bite his nose, if she so 
pleases." — " And eat it up, if she has a fancy 
that way," added a jocular barrister half aloud. 

Let us next consider how the thing stands 
when it is apparently only a question of a 
kiss snatched by force — for it is, you know, 



68 THE KISS 

a matter of general knowledge that a woman's 
** No " IS not always to be taken seriously. 
The refusal may, you know, be merely feigned. 
The maiden's " No " is the swain's " Yes," 
Peder Syv teaches us, and Runeberg, who also 
understood women, says : — 

Ev'ry girl is fond of kisses, 

Though she may pretend to scorn them. 

W. F. H. 

If one is now convinced that the German 
proverb which says : Auf ein Weibes Ztinge 
ist Nein nicht Nein (On a woman's tongue 
" no " is not ** no "), what then ? Well, but 
how the point is to be finally settled is not 
satisfactorily explained by the authorities 
within my reach ; and this is the reason why I 
dare not pronounce an opinion on the ques- 
tion at issue. But I am convinced that the 
momentary difficulty will afford the man the 
necessary diplomatic qualities as well as the 
requisite tact. There is only one thing I 
can lay down for certain, viz., that if a man 
follows his natural simplicity and reserve, 
and takes the girl's feigned " No " seriously, 
she will only laugh at him afterwards — such, 
again, is woman's nature. 

A well-known French chanson deals with 



LOVE KISSES 69 

a hunter who meets a young girl out in the 
forest. Struck by her beauty, he wants to 
kiss her : 

And takes her by her white hand, 

Intending to caress her ; 

W. F. H. 

but she begins to cry, and, moved by her 
tears, he releases her ; but he has hardly got 
clear of the wood before she begins to laugh 
at him heartily, and in derision shouts after 
him : ** When you Ve got hold of a quail 
you ought to pluck it, and when you Ve got 
hold of a girl you ought to embrace her": 

Quand vous tenitz la caille, 
II fallnit la pinincr. 
Quand vous leiiiez la fillelte, 
11 fallait IVnibrasser. 

I quote these verses, for they may possibly 
afford inexperienced young men some matter 
for reflection. 

Besides, a woman's " No " has often a 
piquancy about it which lovers of a somewhat 
more refined class set great store by. Even 
Martial (v. 46) has expressed himself in favour 
of this in a little epigram which begins thus : 

While ev'ry joy I scorn, but that I snatch ; 
And me thy furies more than features catch. 



70 THE KISS 

And Marot, who was likewise much skilled 
in *' ars amandi,'' even begs his mistress not 
to give him her kisses readily : 

Mouth of coral, rare and bright, 
That in kissing seems to bite ; 
Longed-for mouth, I pray you this : 
Feign deny me when you kiss. 

WW • P • XJI* 

Dorat has also expressed himself in favour 
of such. " Promise me nine kisses," says he to 
his Thais, " give me eight, and let me struggle 
for the ninth." 

The first eight kisses you accord 
Will crown my love's felicity ; 

But I shall die in joy's reward 
If for the ninth a struggle be. 

W. F. H. 

Even if the answer is not a decided negative, 
yet it can, you know, be couched in such 
equivocal words as to be tantamount to neither 
a permission nor a refusal. Many girls agree 
with the Swedish song : 

But ** yes" 's a word I will not say, 
Nor will I either answer " nay." 

W. F. H. 

There is a saying in Jutland that runs thus : 
**Maren, may I kiss you? — Guess. You 
won't then, I suppose } — Guess once more ? 



LOVE KISSES 71 

You will ? — But how could you guess 
it then?" This tallies capitally with the 
following German saying : " Zwinge mich^ so 
thu ich keine Silnde,'' sagte das Mddchen 
(** Constrain me, so that I shall not commit 

sin," said the maiden). Naturally in this case, 
there can be no question of any crimen oscu- 
lationis, for, as the jurists have it, volenti non 
Jit injuria. 

Let us finally examine all these kisses from 
an ethical standpoint. We have all of us, 
you know, learnt from our earliest childhood 
that — 

He who kisses maidens hath 
A very naughty habit ; 

W. F. II. 

and popular belief adds, by way of warning, 
that it causes sores on the mouth. Ah, yes, 
that is certainly very true, but what becomes 
of our childish lore in the main when we attain 
to somewhat riper age? Now, only listen to 
the ballad about what happened in the case 
of the young Serb, in spite of all he had 
learnt : 

Here, so people told us, 
Dwells a youth industrious, 
Who from ancient volumes 
Late and early studies. 



72 THE KISS 

As for books they tell us : 
Don't vault on the saddle, 
Buckle not thy sword on, 
Drink no wine that fuddles, 
Never kiss a maiden. 

But the young man harkens 
Not to what they tell him : 
Keenest sword he seizes. 
Hottest wine he drinketh, 
Fairest maids he kisses. 



W. F. H. 



When so learned a man as our Serb suc- 
cumbs to the tempting kiss, what is to be said 
then about all the rest who are less instructed ? 
And let us remember ere we sit in judgment 
on any one — ^and it ought to be regarded as 
peculiarly extenuating circumstances — that a 
woman's mouth is a direct incentive to kiss- 
ing, that it is formed, as you know, for that 
purpose, asserts an old troubadour, and created 
to kiss and smile : — 

And when I gazed upon her red mouth sweet, 

To match whose charms not Jove himself were meet, 

That mouth for laughter and for kisses framed, 
I fell thereof so amorous straightway 
That I lacked power to do aught or to say. 

W. F. H. 

The roguish mouth with the white teeth and 
the moist red, delicately-shaped lips say to 



LOVE KISSES 73 

every man who is not made of marble, " Kiss 
me, kiss me " : 

Her fresh mouth's playing 
Seems ever saying 
To kiss I am fain 
Again, again. 

W. F. H. 

How human is Byron's wish that all women 
had but one mouth so that he might kiss them 
all at the same time : 

That womankind had but one rosy mouth, 
To kiss ihein all at once from north to south. 

Runeberg has uttered a similar wish, and 
with a minute account of his reasons : 

I gaze on a bevy of damsels, 
V\\\ gazing and gazing incessant^ 
The fairest of all Til be choosing. 
And yet as to choice Tm uncertain ; 
For one has the brightest of bright eyes, 
Another girPs cheeks are more rosy, 
A third one's lips are the riper. 
The fourth has a heart far more tender. 
There isn't a single maid lacking 
A something ihal captures my senses. 
There isn't one there I'd say " no" to. 
Oh, would I might kiss the whole bevy ! 

W. F. H. 

Even an ecclesiastic such as iEneas Silvius 
Piccolominiy when wishing to describe how 
beautiful and fascinating a young girl was, 



U THE KISS 

writes that " no one could see her without being 
seized at once with a desire to kiss her." So 
as not to shock my readers, I may mention 
that he wrote this before he was made Pope 
and assumed the name of Pius II. 

It ought now to be taken as proved that 
women — beautiful women — ^and kisses are of 
a piece. It is at the same time nature's ordi- 
nance, and we find it verified in all countries 
and in all ages. Odin himself says, you know, 
in Hdvamdl, where he instructs mortals in the 
wisdom of life : 

Ships are for voyages, 

And shields for ward, 

Sword-blades to smite, 

And maids to kiss. 

W. F. H. 

And the Greeks sing : '* Wine belongs to 
chestnuts, honey to nuts, and kisses morning 
and night to young maids." 

I am inclined to assume that women also 
agree with this view ; certainly I have no 
positive enunciation to support my assumption, 
but I am able to quote a German proverb 
which most assuredly points in this direction : 
** IcA kann das Kilssen nicht leiden^' sagte das 
M'ddchen, ^^wenn ich nicht dabei bin " (** I can- 



LOVE KISSES 76 

not bear kissing," said the maiden, "when I 
am not taking any part in it") 

Now if, in spite of all I have quoted, some 
rigid moralist or other will persist that kissing 
young maids is always a *' bad " habit, and if, 
peradventure, a still sterner moralist will main- 
tain it is a sin into the bargain, I should reply 
that, in any case, it is one of those sorts of sin 
that are venial. The Pope himself will not 
refuse his absolution, say the Italians, and 
they certainly ought to understand things in 
Rome. " Kiss me," runs an Italian folk-song, 
" the Pope will forgive you ; kiss me and I will 
kiss you, and the Pope will forgive us both." 

O bcUa figlia, o bella garzona, 
Baciate me, ch^ il Papa vi perdona ; 
Baciate me, ch^ io bacer6 vui, 
Ch^ il Papa ci perdona tutti e dui. 

If the Pope is so complaisant then, to be 
sure, a subordinate servant of the Church such 
as Aarcstrups Father Hugo may well say: 

Child, a kiss is but a trifle, 
If it*s only long and sweet. 

W. F. H. 



Ill 



AFFECTIONATE KISSES 



Seigneur, tu m'as donn^ les baisers de ma m^re, 
Je te b^nis, Seigneur 1 

F. £ Adam. 



I bless thee, O Lord, for having given me my mother's kisses. 



CHAPTER lU 



AFFECTIONATE KISSES 



A KISS can also express feelings from which 
the erotic element is excluded — feelings that 
are consequently less ardent and longing, 
but, most frequently, far deeper and more 
lasting. 

A kiss is expressive of love in the widest 
and most comprehensive meaning of the word, 
bringing a message of loyal affection, grati- 
tude, compassion, sympathy, intense joy, and 
profound sorrow. In the first place a kiss 
is the expression of the deep and intense 
feeling which knits parents to their off- 
spring. At its entrance into the world the 
little helpless infant is received by its fathers 
and mothers warm kiss. In the Middle 
Ages they kissed the new-born baby thrice 
in the name of the Holy Trinity. And the 
parent's kiss follows the child through life. 

79 



80 THE KISS 

When Hector takes leave of his wife 
Andromache he lifts his little son up into 
his arms, but the child is afraid of his 
fathers helmet, '*of the gleam of the copper 
and the nodding crest of horse-hair." 

And from his brow 
Hector the casque removed, and set it down, 
All glittering, on the ground ; then kissed his child, 
And danced him in his arms.* 

The Evangelist Luke tells the story of 
the Prodigal Son's return home. ** But when 
he was yet a great way off, his father saw 
him, and had compassion, and ran and fell 
on his neck, and kissed him." 

The parent s kiss is like the good angel 
which shields the child from all evil. When 
Johannes in Soren Kierkegaard's For/0rerens 
dagbog would describe the impression made 
on him by Cordelia he says, "She looked 
so young and fresh, as if nature like a tender 
and opulent mother had that very instant 
released her from her hand," and he goes 
on to say: **It seemed to me as if I had 
been witness to this farewell scene ; I marked 
how the loving mother once again embraced 
her and bade her farewell ; I heard her say : 

* Translated by Edward, Earl of Derby. 



AFFECTIONATE KISSES 81 

' Go out into the world now, my child ; I 
have done all for you. Now take this kiss 
as a seal upon your lips ; 'tis a seal the 
sanctuary preserves ; no one can break it 
against your own will, but when the right 
man comes, you shall understand him.' And 
she presses a kiss on her lips — a kiss which, 
not like a human kiss, takes aught, but a 
divine kiss that gives all." The chaste purity, 
which is Cordelia s halo and protection, is, as 
it were, the reflection of a mother's kiss. 

It is for this reason also that in the 
sagas a quite irresistible power is attributed 
to the parent's kiss. When Vildering, the 
king's son, quits Maid Miseri and journeys 
alone to his parents to tell them what has 
befallen him, she implores him to be especi- 
ally careful not to let his parents kiss him, 
"for should that happen, you will forget me 
utterly." In spite of his caution his mother 
kisses him, and oblivion covers the past ; 
he forgets his betrothed, who is sitting and 
waiting for him in the depths of the forest. 

Kisses of affection are exchanged not 
only between parents and children, but be- 
tween all the members of the same family; 

we find them even outside the more narrow 

F 



82 THE KISS 

family circle, everywhere where deep affec 
tion unites people. 

When Naomi bade her son's wife farewell, 
" they lifted up their voice and wept again ; 
and Orpah kissed her mother-in-law; but 
Ruth clave unto her." When Moses went 
to meet his father-in-law, "he did obeisance 
and kissed him ; and they asked each other 
of their welfare; and they came into the 
tent ; " and when Jacob had wrestled with 
the Lord he met Esau, ran towards him, fell 
on his neck and kissed him. 

The family kiss was also much in vogue 
with the Romans. Propertius, in one of his 
elegies, chides his mistress for inventing 
quite ad libitum a whole crowd of relations 
so as always to have at hand some one to 
kiss her. This is how that came to pass : 
In ancient times there was a so-called jus 
osculiy which allowed all a woman's relations 
to kiss her. There are several curious 
stories about this peculiar privilege. The 
old traditions, which have been solemnly 
discussed by several writers, relate that 
once upon a time women were forbidden to 
drink wine ; the above-mentioned law must 
have been instituted so that the parties 



AFFECTIONATE KISSES 83 

concerned should, in a pleasant and practical 
way, be able to satisfy themselves about 
observing the prohibition. This highly 
improbable explanation has been defended 
in a thesis for the degree of Doctor of 
Philosophy even in the eighteenth century. 
The kiss of affection is often mentioned 
by the early Greeks. Odysseus, on reaching 
his home, meets his faithful shepherds, dis- 
closes his identity to them, and shows them, 
as a certain proof, the cicatrix of a wound 
that he had on one occasion received when 
out hunting : 

"But come, another token most manifest will T show, 
Thai the tiulli in your souls may be strcnglliciied, and 

my very self ye may know. 
Lo the scar of the hurt, which the wood-boar with his 

white tooth drave on a tide, 
When with Aulolycus' children I sought Parnassus' 

side ! " ♦ 

So saying, the rags about him from the mighty weal 

he drew, 
And they twain looked upon it, and all the tale they 

knew ; 
And they wept, and o'er wise Odysseus they cast their 

hands, they twain, 
And kissed his head and his shoulders, and loved him 

and were fain.* 

* William Morris' Translation. 



84 THE KISS 

In the same hearty manner the shepherd 
Eumaeus received Odysseus* son on the 
latter's return from his journey, and lucky 
escape from the treacherous plot of the 
suitors : 

And on the head he kissed him, and both his eyes so 

fair, 
And both his hands, moreover, and he shed a mighty 

tear ; 
And e'en as a loving father makes much of his dear son. 
Who has come from an alien country where the tenth 

long year is done. 
His only son and darling for whom he hath travailed 

sore. 
E'en so the goodly swineherd now kisseth him o*er and 

o'er 
Telemachus the godlike, as one escaped from death.* 

He gets the same reception from his old 
nurse and his mother: 

But the nurse, e'en Euryclea, beheld him first of all 

As the fleecy fells she was spreading o'er the painted 

seats of the hall, 
And, weeping, went straight toward him ; and the other 

maids thereto 
Of Odysseus hardy-hearted, all round about him drew, 
And they kissed him and caressed him, his shoulders and 

his head.* 



William Morns' Translation. 



AFFECTIONATE KISSES 85 

Then Penelope the wise-heart from her chamber forth 

she sped> 
Like to golden Aphrodite or Artemis the fair, 
And she cast her arms amidst weeping round her son 

beloved and dear ; 
And therewithal she kissed him, his head and his lovely 

eyes.* 

We have another famous scene of recog- 
nition, but of far later date, in the old 
French epic of Girart de Roussillon. Girart, 
after many years' absence, returns in poverty 
and sickness to France. He presents him- 
self to the queen, who recognises him by 
means of a ring, and, "although it was 
Good Friday, she fell on Girart's neck and 
kissed him seven times." 

It would perhaps be superfluous to quote 
more instances of the kisses of affection. We 
meet with it in all ages in grave and solemn 
moments, not only among those who love 
each other, but also as an expression of 
profound gratitude. When the Apostle Paul 
took leave of the elders of the congregation 
at Ephesus, ''they all wept sore, and fell 
on Pauls neck and kissed him *' (Acts xx. 37). 

When De Malesherbes had solicited for 
himself the perilous honour of undertaking 

* William Morris' Translation, 



86 THE KISS 

the defence of Louis XVI., that monarch 
got up and, in order to show his gratitude, 
kissed him publicly. 

Even among persons who are utter 
strangers to each other, kisses such as these 
may be exchanged. The profoundest sym- 
pathy with, the warmest interest in, another's 
weal or woe can be instantly created. 

The story of Ingeborg Vinding and Poul 
Vendelbo L0ven0rn is well known. H. P. 
Giessing relates it, just as he heard it, in 
the following form : Poul Vendelbo, the poor 
student, went one day on the ramparts 
round Copenhagen, and walked with two 
rich noblemen who, like himself, had matricu- 
lated at the university from Horsen's School. 
They happened to notice a singularly beautiful 
woman sitting at the window of one of the 
adjacent houses. One of the noblemen then 
said half-mockingly to Vendelbo, ** Now, if 
you could get a kiss from that lady, Poul, 
we would defray the expenses of that tour 
abroad which you are so anxious to make." 
Vendelbo took him at his word, went up to 
the beautiful lady, and told her how his 
whole future possibly depended on her. She 
then drew him towards the window, and, in 



AFFECTIONATE KISSES 87 

the view of the nobleman, gave him the kiss 
he craved. He went abroad, and, return- 
ing at last as Adjutant - General L0ven0rn, 
paid the fair lady a visit. She was none 
other than Ingcborg Vinding. 

This is the anecdote, equally character- 
istic of both parties, that Carl Ploug has 
so prettily treated in his poem Et Kys (A 
Kiss). 

The professor's daughter is sitting alone 
in the sitting-room, and ** humming a song 
she has learnt by heart." Then some one 
knocks at the door, and in steps young Poul 
with his audacious request ; first she will 
refuse him indignantly : 

Ere yet a word she uttered 

She raised her eyes again. 
Their angry flash should wither 

That overbold young swain. 

But, ah, he stood so quiet, 

With such a modest grace, 
With features stamped with honour, 

And such a noble face. 

Once more the maiden's glances 
Looked down, their anger dead, 

And with a blush delicious 
She spoke him fair instead, 



88 THE KISS 

^ Twas wrong indeed, I take it, 
That you should boldly dare 
Address a well-born maiden 
By stealth with such a prayer. 

^' But if your looks belie not, 
You good and noble are, 
And so your path to fortune 
I should be loth to mar." 

Then by the hand she leads him 

To where the window is, 

She blushes and she trembles ; 

They interchange a kiss. 

W. F. H. 

It would be superfluous to say more about 
this poem, which I suppose is the most 
popular of Ploughs essays in epic narrative. 
How far the anecdote is historical is un- 
certain ; but with the knowledge wc have 
of his and her character it cannot, in any 
case, be regarded as improbable. Ploug 
may thus be right when he says : 

A kiss has with its gentle flame 

Once kindled honour's beacon high ; 

A kiss has given Denmark's fame 
A hero's name that shall not die. 

W. F. H. 

In early French literature there is a story 
somewhat akin to this; it occurs in the old 



AFFECTIONATE KISSES 89 

miracle play of ''La Marquise de la Gaudiney 
In her husband's absence she has been falsely 
accused of adultery and thrown into prison. 
Nobody dares to undertake her defence when, 
suddenly, a knight named Anthcnor steps 
up and offers, with sword in hand, to under- 
take the defence of her innocence, having 
a long time back owed her a deep debt 
of gratitude for having, on one occasion, 
saved his life by a kiss. He himself tells 
us naively and ingenuously how it happened : 
**Once upon a time I found myself, as you 
are aware, in peril of death ; the king suspected 
me and believed I aspired to his wife's favour. 
Ah, this was not the case at all, you know. 
But one day he said he would believe me 
if I divulged to him who my sweetheart was. 
I did not know what to do, and to save my 
life I said that the marquise was my amie. 
He was not, however, content with this, but, 
as a proof, demanded that I should take her 
by the waist in his presence and ask her for a 
kiss. She gave it me and thus saved me from 
the snare the king had laid. I shall never 
be able to repay her for what she has done 

for me." 

* 

The kiss of affection is also bestowed on 



90 THE KISS 

some person or thing that excites detestation 
and abhorrence. 

The legends of St Martin tell us how, on 
coming one day to Lutetia, followed by a 
great crowd of people, he caught sight of a 
leper at the gate of the city, who was so 
terrible an object to look at that everybody 
turned away from him with loathing. To 
give those who followed him a lesson in 
Christian charity, he went up to the poor 
sick man, kissed and blessed him, and on the 
following morning the latter was cured as by 
a miracle. 

It is just through overcoming oneself in 
respect to that which is intrinsically foul and 
repugnant that this kiss gets its high signifi- 
cance and dignity. St Francis of Assisi had 
bidden farewell to an existence of luxury, 
bestowed his wealth on the necessitous, 
and lived the life of a beggar, but his con- 
version was still incomplete ; he did not 
become ripe for his great work of charity 
until he had overcome his repugnance to 
the leprous. One day, when out riding, he 
met one of these wretched sufferers, whose 
whole body was like a great open wound, 
and he reined his horse aside in disgust ; but 



AFFECriONATE KISSES 91 

shame overtook him at once, he leapt off his 
horse, spoke kindly to the sick man, gave 
him what money he had, and kissed both 
his hands. Such is the account given by 
the historical chronicles, but the legend goes 
on to say that the leper immediately after- 
wards vanished : it was Christ Himself who 
wished, in this wise, to bestow His benediction 
on the noble and beautiful life s work of the 
saint. 

The kiss of affection also plays an import- 
ant part in folk-poetry ; that alone has power 
to cast off spells, that alone breaks all the 
bonds of witchcraft and sorcery, and is able 
to restore man to his original shape. 

in the Scotch ballad of Kempion we are 
told how the Earl of Estmereland's daughter 
is persecuted by her wicked stepmother, who 
at last by magic arts changes her into a 
snake : 

Cum heir, cum heir, ye freely feed 
And lay your head low on my knee ; 

The heaviest weird I will you read, 
That ever was read to gay ladye. 

O meikle dolour sail ye dree, 

And aye the salt seas o'er ye'se swim ; 

And far mair dolour sail ye dree, 

On Estmere crags, when ye them climb. 



92 THE KISS 

" I weired ye to a fiery beasts 
And relieved sail ye never be, 
Till Kenipion, the king's son, 

Cum to the crag, and thrice kiss thee.'' 

O meikle dolour did she dree, 
And aye the salt seas o'er she swam ; 

And far mair dolour did she dree 

On Estmere crags, when she them clamb. 

And aye she cried for Kempion^ 

Gin he would but come to her hand. 

At last Kempion hears her voice, and straight- 
way rows towards the foot of the mountain : 

Out of my styllic I wiinia rise, 

• • » » » » 

Till Kempion, the king's son. 

Cum to the crag, and thrice kiss me ; 

implores the snake ; but Kempion dares not. 
The snake coils in and out, and the mountain 
is aflame; at last Kempion summons all his 
courage : 

He's louted him o'er the lofty crag. 
And he has given her kisses three ; 

Awa she gaed, and again she cam, 
The loveh'est ladyc e'er could be ! 

The same subject is found in the ballads 
of other countries. In the Danish Jo7nfruen 
i ormekam the young maiden has been 
changed into a little snake, compelled to 



AFFECTIONATE KISSES 93 

wriggle in the grass. However, the knight 
Jennus conies : 

It was the brave knight Jennus ; 

Forth to the greenwood he hies. 
As o'er the grass he rideth, 

A little snake he espies. 

It was the brave knight Jennus ; 

Over his saddle he lay. 
He kissed the little serpent ; 

A maiden it turned straightway. 

It was the brave knight Jennus ; 

Troth to the maid he did plight. 

He bade them keep his wedding 

For both with much delight. 

W. F. H. 

In another ballad the maiden has been 
turned by her stepmother into a lime-tree, 
and makes her moan : 

She changed me into a lime-tree, and 
She bade me e'en in the greenwood stand. 

She bade me stand and hope for no bote, 
Until a king's son should kiss my root. 

Here have I tarried for years full ^wej 
Nor kissed me has any king's son alive. 

Here have I tarried for years now ten. 
Nor has a king's son kissed me since then. 

W. F. H. 

But at last the hour of her freedom arrives ; 



94 THE KISS 

the king's daughter has heard the lime-tree's 
lamentation, and she sends a message to her 
brother, who comes at once : 

He hoisted his silken sail of red, 
And o'er the salt sea on he sped. 

The knight on his back a red cloak threw, 
And fared to the lime-tree without ado. 

He kissed himself the lime-tree's feet, 
Which straight became a maiden sweet. 

W. F. H. 

Corresponding poetical stories of the re- 
deeming power of the kiss are to be found 
in the literature of many countries, especially, 
for example, in the Old French Arthurian 
romances [Lancelot^ Guiglain^ Tirant le blanc) 
in which the princess is changed by evil arts 
into a dreadful dragon, and can only resume 
her human shape in the case of a knight 
being brave enough to kiss her. This kiss 
is called le fier baiser. From French the 
subject migrated to Italian literature, in 
which it was taken up and made use of first 
in CarduinOy later on in Boiardos Orlando 
innamorato. The hero, after many perilous 
adventures, reaches an enchanted castle 
where a young and beautiful maiden is sitting 



AFFECTIONATE KISSES 95 

by a tomb. She tells him she can be released 
if he will venture to lift the stone from the 
tomb and kiss what then appears. Without 
giving it a second thought, the knight opens 
the tomb, and a horrible serpent with hissing 
tongue and venomous breath darts forth. 
Trembling with fear, he fulfils his promise, 
and that very instant the monster is trans- 
formed into a lovely fairy who overwhelms 
her benefactor with recompenses. This motif 
formed the subject of a drama in the last 
century by Gozzi in La donna serpente : fiaba 
teatrale tragicomica. 

Finally many folk-stories on this subject 
may be quoted. In the tale of '* Beauty and 
the Beast," the transformed prince begged 
the young maiden he had carried off on his 
back for a kiss. **No," answered she, "how- 
could I kiss you who are so ugly and have 
seven horns on your forehead ."^^ Then the 
beast went its way, and she saw it no more 
till one day she found it lying dead under a 
bush in the garden, whereupon she wept as 
she had never wept before, and cast herself 
down on the beast and kissed it. Then it 
returned to life, and the ugly beast became 
the handsomest prince her eyes could see. 



96 THE KISS 

He then told her that he had been bewitched 
by a wicked fairy, and could not be delivered 
unless a maid fell in love with him and kissed 
him, despite his ugliness. 

In this case the kiss redeems from death, 
and likewise death itself is nothing more than 
a great kiss of affection. When a human 
being quits this earthly life it is God who 
takes His child in His arms, kisses it, and 
carries it away from earth to brighter and 
more blissful spheres. 

This highly poetical and beautiful concep- 
tion of death has found expression in Italian, 
where, instead of the word "die," one can 
say, **fall asleep in the Lords kiss" {addor- 
mentarsi nel bacio del Signore\ And this 
has got flesh and blood in an old legend of 
the saints, where it is told of St Monica that, 
as she lay dying on her couch, a little child 
whom nobody knew came and kissed her on 
her breast, and straightway, as if the child 
had called her, she bowed her head and 
breathed forth her last sigh. 

The kiss of affection follows man even after 
death ; with a kiss one takes leave of the 
lifeless body. 

In Genesis we read that when Jacob was 



AFFECTIONATE KISSES 97 

dead, "Joseph fell upon his father's face and 
wept upon him and kissed him '* ; and it is 
told of Abu Bekr, Mahomet's first disciple, 
father-in-law, and successor, that, when the 
prophet was dead, he went into the latter's 
tent, uncovered his face, and kissed him. 

In the curious poem of Bdde Tyges0ns 
dSdsridt^ when the knight's horse carries his 
corpse back to his betrothed, it is said : 

She lifted up his gory head, 

And raised it to her lips to kiss ; 

She swooned away, and fell back dead, 

In very sooth, as she did this. 

W. F. H. 

In ancient times lovers always demanded 
of each other this act of love. "When the 
alabaster box, filled with Syrian perfume, 
has been poured out over my dead body, 
then do thou, O Cynthia, press thy last kisses 
on my cold lips," sings Proper tius in one of 
his elegies : 

Osculaque in gelidis pones suprema labellis, 
Cum dabitur Syrio munere plenus onyx. 

Propertius iii. 4, 29, 30. 

And the same wish is expressed by Tibullus 
(L, i. 61, 62) : 

Flebis et arsuro positum me, Delia, lecto, 
Tristibus et lacrymis oscula mixta dabis. 

G 



98 THE KISS 

" You'll weep for me, dear Delia, ere flames have caught 
my bier, 
And mingle with your kisses full many a bitter tear." 

W. F. H. 

The death-kiss is something so natural that 
it is superfluous to point out its existence 
amongst different nations. It was not only a 
mark of love, but it was also an article of 
belief that the soul might be detained for a 
brief while by such a kiss. Ovid, in his 
Tristia, laments over his joyless existence in 
Tomis, whither Augustus had banished him, 
and is in despair because, when the hour of 
death approaches, he will not have his be- 
loved wife by his side to detain his fleeting 
spirit by her kisses mingled with tears. 

The kiss is the last tender proof of love 
bestowed on one we have loved, and was 
believed, in ancient times, to follow mankind 
to the nether world. Even in our own days, 
popular belief in many places demands that 
the nearest relative shall kiss the corpses 
forehead ere the coffin lid is screwed down ; 
in certain parts, indeed, it is incumbent on 
every one who sees a dead body to kiss it, 
otherwise he will get no peace for the dead. 



IV 

THE KISS OF PEACE 

Salute invicem in osculo sancto. 

Pauli Epist cui Romanes^ xvi. i6. 

Salute one another with an holy kiss. 



CHAPTER IV 



THE KISS OF PEACE 



The kiss, as expressive of deep, spiritual love, 
alsa came to figure in the primitive Christian 
Church. 

Christ has said : " Peace be with you, my 
peace I give you," and the members of 
Christ's Church gave each other peace 
symbolically through a kiss. St Paul re- 
peatedly speaks of the "holy kiss" i^lXtiiJM 
ayi^v), and, in his Epistle to the Romans, 
writes : ** Salute one another with an holy 
kiss " ; and he reiterates this exhortation in 
both his Epistles to the Corinthians (i, xvi. 20, 
and 2, xiii. 12), and his first Epistle to the 
Thcssalonians (v. 26), wherein he says : "Greet 
all the brethren with an holy kiss." 

The holy kiss has gradually found admis- 
sion into the ritual of the Church, and was 
imparted on occasions of particular solemnity, 

such as baptism, marriage, confession, ordina- 
m 



102 THE KISS 

tion, obsequies, etc, etc At a wedding the 
ceremony was as follows : On the conclusion 
of High Mass and after the Agnus Dei had 
been chanted, the bridegroom went up to the 
altar and received the kiss of pe*ice from the 
priest After this he returned to his wife, 
and gave her the priest's kiss of peace at 
the foot of the crucifix. Reminiscences of 
this rite still survive in several churches in 
England. 

The holy kiss played an important part 
even at the Mass ; in the Greek Church it 
was imparted before, in the Roman Catholic 
Church after, the consecration of the elements. 
The priest kissed the penitent, and through 
this kiss gave him peace ; this was the true 
kiss of peace (psailum pacts). We have a 
peculiar memorial of this in Old Irish, where 
the word pdc, which is derived from the 
Latin pax, means "kiss," — not "peace." 
This change of meaning must, 1 suppose, be 
attributed partly to a misunderstanding of 
the priest's words when he kissed the 
penitent : Pacem do tibi (Peace I give unto 
thee), i,e., people understood the kiss as the 
chief thing, and thought pacem referred to 
that, The same peculiarity is again to be 



THE KISS OF PEACE 103 

met with in mediaeval Spanish, where paz 
has also the meaning of "kiss." In an 
ancient romance which relates how Fernando 
dubbed the Cid a knight, it says at the end, 
** He buckled a sword on his waist, and gave 
him 'peace' (/.^., a kiss) on the mouth" : 

El rey le ciAo 4a-€9pada 
-Paz eti la boca le ha dado. 

The holy kiss occurs even in the early 
Christian love-feasts, the so-called ayaTrar, and «*, 
indeed was often exchanged in the church 
itself by all the faithful without regard to 
sex, which gave the heathen cause for 
scandal, and its use was restricted so that 
only men kissed men, and women, women. 

The kiss of peace was in vogue in France 
down to the thirteenth century. We find it 
in the story about a very unpleasant incident 
to which Queen Margaret, the wife of St 
Louis, was exposed. One day when she was 
in church and the kiss of pciicc was to be 
imparted, she saw close beside her a woman 
in splendid apparel, and taking the latter to 
be a lady of rank, she gave her the kiss of 
peace. It turned out, however, that the 
queen had made a mistake; she had kissed 



104 THE KISS 

one of the common courtesans who always 
swarmed about the Court. She then com- 
plained to the king, the consequence of which 
was that certain ordinances were drawn up 
with respect to the dress of women of that 
class, in order to render all confusion with 
respectable women henceforward impossible. 

The kiss of peace in the churches seems 
to have been abolished in the latter part of the 
Middle Ages, at different times in different 
countries. 

In the middle of the thirteenth century 
a special instrument for conveying the kiss 
was introduced into England — the so-called 
osculatorium or tabella pacts, which was 
composed of a metal disc with a holy 
picture, and was passed round the church 
to be kissed. 

From the English Church the osculatory 
was gradually introduced into other churches, 
but nowhere does it appear to have contrived 
to rejoice in any particularly long stay. In 
various ways it gave occasion to scandal. 

It was provocative of contention and strife 
in the church itself, when people of position 
quarrelled violently as to whom the honour 
belonged of kissing it first. Contentions as 



THE KISS OF PEACE 106 

to precedence at church are».^ ^ s w e see, of 
long standing. 

It seems also to have served as a sort of 
profane intermediary between lovers. When 
a young and beautiful girl kissed it she had 
close beside her a fine young fellow who 
waited impatiently to take it directly from 
her hand and lips. We read in one of 
Marot's poems : 

I told the maid that she was fair ; 
I've kissed the Pax just after her. 

W. FrH: 

Through the use of the osculatory, the 
well-known custom of gallants such as, from 
the Greek romances and Ovid, existed in 
ancient times, was revived — Huet calls it 
elegans urbanitatis genus — when the lover 
drank out of the goblet from the very place 
which the beloved one's lips had touched. 
Formerly a sort of pax was employed even 
in Danish churches. The Catholic priests 
showed the people **a picture in a book" (of 
course the picture of some saint), and this 
picture was kissed by the congregation ; for 
which purpose a small fee termed "kiss- 
money" or "book-money" was handed to 
the parish clerk. 



106 THE KISS 

Even after the use of the pax had been 
abolished by the Reformation, the "book- 
money," as a customary due to the clerk, was 
retained. But at a congress at Roskilde in 
1565, parish clerks were forbidden to demand 
this fee. 

The holy kiss is still imparted in the Greek 
Church on Easter Sunday ; all the faithful greet 
each other in church with kisses, and the 
words, "Christ is risen," the reply to which 
being, "Verily, He hath risen." In the Roman 
Catholic liturgy this usage has been confined 

to certain masses, and the holy kiss is only 
exchanged among the clergy, not among the 
members of the congregation. First, the 
bishop and archdeacon kiss the altar, then 
the archdeacon kneels down and the bishop 
gives him the kiss of peace with the words : 
Pax tibi^f rater ^ et ecclesue sanctce /?«' (Peace 
be with thee, brother, and with God's Holy 
Church). The archdeacon answers : Et cum 
spiritu tuo (And with thy spirit), after which he 
gets up, genuflects towards the altar, and 
carries the kiss of peace to the chief canon, 
whom he kisses on the left cheek with the 
words pax tibi^ and thus it is sent round to 



THE KISS OF PEACE 107 

all the officiating clergy with many different 
ceremonies. 

The holy kiss soon spread beyond the walls 
of the church, and came into usage even in 
secular festivities. Thus, during the Middle 
Ages, it was the custom to seal the reconci- 
liation and pacification of enemies by a kiss. 
The old German poets mention such a kiss 
under the name of *' Vredekuss," and so wide- 
spread was the custom of the kiss of reconcilia- 
tion, that the verb at sonCy or udsone^ got the 
meaning of **to kiss." SSnen has still this 
meaning in Frisian. 

In an old French miracle-play St Bernard 
of Clairvaux says to Count William and the 
Bishop of Poitiers, who had had a long-stand- 
ing feud with each other, and between whom 
he had managed to make peace : "In order 
to show that your friendship is true and 
sincere, you must kiss each other." Count 
William then goes up to the bishop, saying : 
** My lord, I crave your forgiveness for the 
wrong I have inflicted on you ; I have erred 
greatly towards you. Kiss me now to seal 
our peace, and I will kiss you with loyal 
heart." 

Even knights gave each other the kiss of 



108 THE KISS 

peace before proceeding to the combat, and 
forgave one another all real or imaginary 
wrongs. 

In Covenant Vivien, Vivien exchanges the 
kiss of peace with Girart and six other illus- 
trious warriors before the great fight with 
King Desram6 begins. 

Manzoni has made use of the kiss of peace 
in the pathetic scene in / promessi Sposi (The 
Betrothed), when Fra Cristoforo obtains for- 
giveness from the nobleman whose son he has 
slain. The nobleman receives the monk in 
his palace. Surrounded by all his relations, 
he stands in the middle of his great hall, with 
left hand on his sword-hilt, whilst with his 
right he holds a flap of his cloak pressed 
against his chest. Cold and stern, he gazes 
contemptuously and with suppressed wrath at 
the novice as he enters, but the latter exhibits 
such touching remorse and noble humility 
that the nobleman, there and then, abandons 
his stiffness. He raises up the kneeling 
brother himself, grants him his forgiveness, 
and, finally, ** carried away by the emotion that 
prevailed, he threw his arms round the latter's 
neck, and gave and received the kiss of peace." 

After the Middle Ages the kiss of peace 



THE KISS OF PEACE 109 

disappears altogether as the official token of 
reconciliation ; solitary instances, indeed, can 
certainly be quoted from Catherine of Medici's 
Court, but they are rather to be regarded as 
studied efforts to re-introduce an old and 
abandoned usage. After the murder of 
Francis de Guise in 1 563, his widow and 
brother meet Admiral de Coligny; the latter 
swore that he had not the least suspicion 
of the assassin's plot, whereupon they kiss 
each other, and mutually promise to forget 
all enmities, and henceforward to live in peace 
and harmony, i This kiss of peace was as 
powerless to revive the old custom as Lam- 
ourettes memorable attempt at the time of 
the Revolution. On the 7th July 1792, when 
the quarrel amongst the members of the 
Legislative Assembly had reached a terrible 
height, at the time when the Austrian and 
Prussian armies were marching on Paris, 
Lamourette got up and made a fervent 
patriotic speech, in which, in the most moving 
terms, he exhorted all the members of the 
Assembly to sink their differences. He finished 
by saying : " Let us forget all dissension and 
swear everlasting fraternity " — ei jtirons-nous 
fratcrnitd dlcrnclle^ and the deputies at once 



no THE KISS 

fell into each other's arms, and in a universal 
kiss of reconciliation every one forgave each 
other's wrongs. But this unity did not last 
long. The quarrels began again the following 
day, and two years afterwards Lamourette 
himself died by the guillotine ; but the ex- 
pression, a kiss of Lamourette — un baiser de 
Lamourette — still survives in the French 
language as a half ironical term for a short- 
lived reconciliation. 



V 



THE KISS OF RESPECT 



Les rois des nations, devant toi prostern^s, 
De tes pieds baisent la poussi&re. 

RACmE— A tAa/ie, 



The kings of the Gentiles, prostrate before thee, kiss the 
dust of thy feet. 



CHAPTER V 



THE KISS OF RESPECT 



Margaret of Scotland, who was betrothed 
to Charles the Seventh's son, the Dauphin 
Louis (afterwards Louis XL), one day walked 
through a hall where Alain Chartier was 
sitting asleep in a chair. On perceiving the 
sleeping poet, she went up to him and kissed 
him on the lips. Many of her suite were 
astonished at this, " for nature had, so far as 
Chartier was concerned, suffered a beautiful 
and rich mind to take up its abode in an ugly 
body." The princess replied that they were 
not to marvel at what she had done, for it was 
not the man she had kissed, but the mouth 
from which so many golden words had pro- 
ceeded. Margaret's kiss was therefore an 
expression of the respect she had for the 
poet, and the admiration and regard inspired 
by his poetical genius. A little further back 

in the Middle Ages we meet with another 
ns H 



lU THE KISS 

Striking instance of a kiss as expressive of 
veneration ; but this kiss is of a more humble 
nature. We are told that, when the Emperor 
Otto I. had taken leave of his pious mother 
in the church attached to a monastery, the 
latter followed him with her eyes as long" as 
she could, and then returned to the church 
and kissed the place whereon his feet had 
stood. 

The kiss of veneration is of ancient origin ; 
from the remotest times we find it applied to 
all that is holy, noble, and worshipful — to the 
gods, their statues, temples, and altars, as well 
as to kings and emperors ; out of reverence, 
people even kissed the ground, and both sun 
and moon were greeted with kisses. 

In the first book of Kings God says to Elijah : 
'* Yet I have left me seven thousand in Israel, 
all the knees which have not bowed unto Baal, 
and every mouth which hath not kissed him " 
(xix. 1 8). 

In the thirty-first chapter of Job, Job extols 
his own piety : ** If I beheld the sun when it 
shined, or the moon walking in brightness ; 
and my heart hath been secretly enticed, or my 
mouth hath kissed my hand" (26, 27). Here, 
undoubtedly, allusion is made to the kissing of 



THE KISS OF RESPECT 115 

hands whereby the heathen were wont to salute 
the heavenly bodies. 

When the prophet Hosea laments over the 
idolatry of the children of Israel, he says that 
they make molten images of calves and kiss 
them. 

Even in remote classical times a similar 
homage was paid to the gods ; people kissed 
the hands, knees, and feet, even the mouths, 
of their idols. Cicero informs us, in one of his 
speeches against Verres, that the lips and 
beard of the famous statue of Hercules at 
Agrigentum were worn away by the kisses of 
devotees. 

Bayle tells us, in reference to this passage, 
that a physician was asked one day why it was 
that a bronze face could, in this manner, be 
worn away through being kissed, whereas, on 
the other hand, kisses did not leave the 
slightest trace on the countenance of the most 
fashionable courtesan. His answer was that 
the reason, he supposed, was that statues were 
kissed for centuries, but that the woman in 
question was only kissed for a very few years, 
viz., so long as her beauty lasted. This ex- 
planation was, however, considered unsatis- 
factory, and the physician's attention was 



116 THE KISS 

called to the fact that soft flesh must be far 
sooner worn away than hard bronze ; besides, 
lover's kisses being considerably more violent 
than those of mere respect. The physician 
then urged another reason, viz., that which 
kisses wear away from bronze lips is lost for 
ever, but that which is worn away from living 
lips is immediately replaced by renewal of 
tissue in the body. 

The kiss of veneration came to play a very 
important part in Christian society. St Luke 
the Evangelist tells us that when Christ sat at 
meat in the Pharisee's house there came a 
woman who had been a great sinner, bringing 
with her a vase of ointment. ** And stood at 
his feet behind him weeping, and began to 
wash his feet with tears, and did wipe them 
with the hairs of her head, and kissed his feet, 
and anointed them with the ointment " (vii. 38). 
When the Pharisee wondered at His having 
allowed such a woman to touch Him, He 
rebuked him by the parable of the two debtors, 
and added, '* Thou gavest me no kiss, but this 
woman since the time I came in hath not ceased 
to kiss my feet. My head with oil thou didst 
not anoint, but this woman hath anointed my 
feet with ointment." 



THE KISS OF RESPECT 117 

Again in the Psalms, ** Kiss the Son, lest 
he be angry, and ye perish from the way, when 
his wrath is kindled but a little. Blessed are 
all they that put their trust in him/* 

C. H. Spurgeon used these lines as the text 
of a sermon he preached in the ** Music Hall," 
London, on the 3rd of July 1859, in which 
he did his utmost to make his congregation 
understand what is meant by saying we are 
to **kiss Christ." "The kiss," says he, "is a 
mark of worship ; to kiss Christ is at the 
same time to recognise Him as God, and to 
pay Him divine worship. The kiss is a mark 
of homage and subjection ; we ought likewise 
to acknowledge Christ as our King, and pro- 
mise to follow blindly His behests. The kiss is 
a sign of reconciliation ; we ought to show that 
we are reconciled with God. Lastly, the kiss is 
the greatest of all tokens of love ; to kiss Christ 
is therefore only a figurative way of expressing 
to love Him with deep and fervent love."* ^ 

As the woman that was a sinner showed 
her reverence for Christ by kissing His feet, 
so all saintly men and women henceforward 
were honoured in a like manner. They were 
saluted humbly by kisses on their hands or 

* Retranslated from the Danish of the Text. 



118 THE KISS 

feet, and the legend goes that he who kissed 
the hand of St Dominic never afterwards 
committed sin. In many countries, more 
especially in Southern Italy, kissing the 
hands of the priest is still customary. 

The kiss reverential was extended to every- 
thing that was holy, or had been consecrated 
to sacred purposes. 

People kissed the Cross with the image of 
the Crucified, and such kissing of the Cross 
is always regarded as a particularly holy act. 
in many countries it is required, on taking 
an oath, as the highest asseveration that the 
witness is speaking the truth, and as a last 
act of charity, the image of the Redeemer is 
handed to the dying or death- condemned to 
be kissed. Kissing the Cross brings blessing 
and happiness. In the south of France people 
used formerly, in moments of difficulty or 
danger, when no Cross was at hand, to kiss 
their thumbs laid in the form of a cross. 
When devout Catholics salute the Pope by 
humbly kissing his slipper, they are fond of 
explaining away this greeting. They say 
that it is not to be taken as any personal 
homage paid to the Pope ; the kiss having 
nothing to do with his slipper, but the cross 



THE KISS OF RESPECT 119 

which is embroidered on it. Therefore Christ 
it is to whom they are prostrating them- 
selves. This idea, however, is undoubtedly a 
later fancy ; the kiss on the slipper ought, I 
take it, more correctly to be considered as 
humble homage to the Pope as primate of 
the Church, and such, therefore, must be the 
view the Pope himself holds, since he has, 
times without number, exempted cardinals 
and other persons of high rank from kissing 
his slipper. The number of kings and 
ambassadors who, in the course of time, have 
refused to submit to this ceremony, have 
undoubtedly regarded it as a humiliation ; and 
popular conception bears this out thoroughly. 
To **kiss the slipper" has become in many 
languages synonymous with a low and 
unworthy cringing. In the old German war- 
song against Charles V., we find : 

Ah, think the whole imperial race 

Through Popery fell in sore disgrace 

And German might was riven. 

Will you for all their knavery 

To slipper-kiss be given ? 

W. F. H. 

People kiss the image of Our Lady. The 
legend tells us that John of Antioch even 
dared to kiss Mary^s mouth, and this kiss 



120 THE KISS 

gave him wisdom and great eloquence, and 
spread a golden glory round his mouth, hence 
his surname Chrysostom (golden mouth).* 

People kiss the pictures and statues of 
saints. Down in St Peters church in Rome 
there is a remarkable old bronze figure of 
St Peter, which is said to date from the fifth 
century, and the faithful have, in all ages, 
shown the highest veneration to this image, 
in consequence of which a great part of the 
right foot has been gradually kissed away. 

Even nowadays the kiss bestowed on the 
pictures of the saints plays an enormous part 
in the Roman Catholic, but more particularly 
in the Greek Church. Not only their 
pictures, but even their relics are kissed ; 
they make both soul and body whole. St 
Balbina obtained forgiveness for her sins by 
kissing St Peter's chains, and Pascals niece 
was cured of a disease in her eyes by kissing 
one of the thorns of Christ's Crown. This 
cure, the historical authenticity of which is, 
however, somewhat doubtful, made a great 

* We have here a striking example of how legends arise. 
John, the Father of the Church, got the epithet "golden- 
mouth" on account of his great eloquence ; but the people 
sought another more concrete explanation, if I may use the 
term, of that name, the metaphorical use of which they failed 
to comprehend. 



THE KISS OF RESPECT 121 

sensation, and provoked a violent controversy 
between the Jansenists and Jesuits. 

Besides, there are legends innumerable of 
sick people regaining their health by kissing 
relics ; innumerable, too, are the satires which 
arose by reason of abuses in respect to cures 
which were achieved with relics genuine and 
false. One of the best known is perhaps the 
mediaival story of The Monks Breeches. 

A Franciscan friar was a very intimate 
friend of a merchant in Orleans and his wife 
— especially of the latter. One evening the 
merchant returned home unexpectedly from a 
journey, and the friar, who had tried to the 
best of his ability to entertain the wife in 
the husbands absence, for certain circum- 
stances which were capable of being mis- 
understood, thought it wisest to disappear as 
quick as possible ; but in his haste he forgot 
his breeches. The merchant, however, did 
not notice anything ; the night was dark, 
and next morning he even put on the friars 
breeches instead of his own. On coming 
back home from his oflfice in the afternoon 
— he had long discovered his mistake — he 
demanded, with violent and hasty words, an 
explanation from his wife; but the latter, 



122 THE KISS 

who had discovered at once in the morn- 
ing what had happened, hurriedly sent a 
messenger to the friar to consult with him 
as to what was to be done. According to 
their arrangement she answered her husband 
very calmly : 

" My dear friend, don't fly into a passion ; 
you ought to thank me instead of quarrelling 
with me. You know we have no children, 
and we have tried everything — but all in vain. 
Now 1 heard that St Francis* breeches could 
work miracles, even of that sort, and that 
is why I had them fetched for you. Take 
them off now, for I expect some one from 
the monastery will be coming for them 
directly." The poor man in his delight 
quickly got out of his breeches, and directly 
he had done so there came a knocking at the 
door. It was the friar, followed by a 
choir boy carrying holy-water and a censer. 
He had come to fetch the precious relic of 
the monastery, and inquisitive neighbours 
flocked in from all quarters. He wrapped 
the breeches reverently up in a white hand- 
cloth, and sprinkled them with holy-water 
while the boy incensed them, after which he 
lifted up the sacred bundle. Meanwhile all fell 



THE KISS OF RESPECT 123 

on their knees, and after pronouncing a 
panegyric on St Francis, he himself carried 
round the breeches so that the people who 
had assembled might kiss them. This they 
did with deep piety and emotion, more especi- 
ally the honest and grateful merchant 

This little story afforded much merriment 
in the Middle Ages. People found much 
enjoyment in its burlesque humour, and never 
got tired of hearing it. It occurs as 6, fabliau^ 
a farce, and a story, and belongs to the 
facetia with which the Pope's Secretary, 
Poggio, amused his friends in // Bugiale (The 
Lie Manufactory). 

Even as regards the great ones of this 
world the kiss used to serve in various ways 
as a mark of humility and reverence. Its 
use in ancient times was remarkably wide- 
spread ; people threw themselves down on 
the ground before their rulers, kissed their 
footprints, literally "licked the dust,*' as it is 
termed. In the Psalms, Solomon sings of the 
promised King : ** They that dwell in the 
wilderness shall bow before him ; and his 
enemies shall lick the dust " ; and the prophet 
Isaiah says : ** Kings shall be thy nursing 
fathers, and queens thy nursing mothers : 



124 THE KISS 

they shall bow clown to thcc with their face 
before the earth and lick up the dust of thy 
feet" (xlix. 23). 

They kissed not only the ground under the 
powerful, but also their feet, knees, hands, or 
the hem of their garments. 

Certain Roman Emperors adopted these 
oriental usages. Thus Caligula ordered people 
to kiss his hands and feet, and even in the 
Middle Ages the custom of kissing the feet 
of kings was in vogue. 

Nearly everywhere, wheresoever an inferior 
meets a superior, we observe the kiss of 
respect. The Roman slaves kissed the hands 
of their masters ; pupils and soldiers those 
of their teachers and captains respectively. 

During the Middle Ages the vassal paid 
homage to his feudal lord by a kiss on the 
hand or foot, hence the expression devoir la 
bouche et les mains. It is well-known what 
befell Charles the Simple when Rollo, the 
Norman chieftain, had to pay him feudal 
homage. The proud Viking would not bow 
down to the king, but laid hold of the latter s 
feet and lifted them up to his mouth, whereat 
the king, amidst the laughter of the spectators, 
tumbled down. Thus the scene is depicted 



THE KISS OF RESPECT 125 

briefly and graphically in the Roman de 
Rou : — 

Quant baisier dut le pie, baisier ne le deigna, 
La main tendi aual, le pie al rei leua, 
A sa bouche le traist e le rei enuersa ; 
Asez s'en ristrent tuit, e li reis se dre^a.* 

They also kissed their liege lords on the 
thigh, and this method of kissing can be 
tniccd down to the sixteenth and seventeenth 
centuries ; but the kiss on the hand was un- 
doubtedly most frequently in use ; and it was 
the general custom for the vassal at the same 
time to hand his lord a present, which is the 
reason why the word baise-main (hand-kiss) 
gradually got this meaning. 

If the lord was absent when the vassal 
waited on him, the latter had to kiss the 
door, the lock or bolt, which was regarded as 
a valid substitution for kissing the hand. 
From this arose the expressions, baiser Vhuis, 
(the door), baiser le verrouil, (the bolt), which 
were used partly as an expression of slavish 

*And when he had to kiss Charles' foot — such kissing Rollo 

spumed — 
He thrust his hand forth downward, and to the monarch turned. 
He raised the king's foot to his lips, and overturned the king, 
Who quickly rose upon his feet whilst mirth around did ring. 

W. F. H. 



126 THE KISS 

subserviency, and partly in an ironical sense 
of lovers who have been rejected by their 
mistresses, and thus constrained to 

Kiss the door, and kiss its chains 

For ladies* sake who are within. W. F. H. 

As expressive not only of respect, but also 
of repentance, children in former days were 
made to kiss the rod by which they had been 
chastised. Geiler von Keiserberg writes in 
the sixteenth century: **When children are 
thrashed they kiss the rods and say : 

Liebe ruot, trute ruot 
werestu, ich tet niemer guot.* 

" They kiss the rods and jump over them, yea 
they leap over them." We have a memorial of 
this custom in the phrase, ** kissing the rod." 

There is still one great power that we have 
not mentioned, and one who demands, too, 
homage by kisses, i.e., the devil ; but, in order 
that the humility shown to him may be as great 
as possible, he must be kissed on his behind, 
i.e.y on the place where the back ceases to be 
called the back. Old pictures of the Sabbath on 

* Which may be freely translated : 

Dear, kind rod that's trusty stood. 
Without thee ne'er should I do good. 



THE KISS OF RESPECT 127 

Blocksberg exhibit to us his Satanic majesty, 
in the guise of a goat or cat, sitting on a high 
seat, while his worshippers reverently approach 
and kiss him under his tail. In several 
confessions of witches wc find this kiss still 
more closely described: **The devil has a 
big tail, and under it a sort of face, but with 
this face he never speaks, as the only use 
he makes of it is to let his most devoted 
followers kiss the same ; for kissing this face 
is regarded as an especially great honour." 
This somewhat awkward kiss occurs, more- 
over, in several sagas. In Harehyrden the 
Jeppe gives up his magic flute to the king on 
condition that the latter kisses his ass under 
its tail. It can also be shown in actual life, 
and we have some anecdotes from the Middle 
Ages which seem to prove that the podex-Viss 
was used as a derisory punishment. There 
is also a story told of a merry knight, once 
upon a time, compelling a party of monks 
to pay their respects to their abbot in the 
aforesaid less dignified way. 

Kisses in ano seem also to have been 
required of neophytes on their reception into 
certain secret societies. 

The part this kiss plays in insulting speech 



128 THE KISS 

ought to be sufficiently well known. The 
Romans ere now spoke about lingere cuhim 
or lambere nates ; the Germans more decently 
say : Kilss mich da ich sitz (Kiss me where I 
sit), or Er kan mich kilssen da zvo ich keine 
Nase habe (lie can kiss me where I have no 
nose). Frenchmen even use the last men- 
tioned paraphrastic expression. It is told 
in an old poem about Theodore de Beza, 
whose youth was, as you are aware, a very 
dissipated one, that, on one occasion, he said 
of a lady that he would like to kiss her, 
but he did not know how he could manage 
to do so as her nose was far too long. When 
the lady learnt this she wittily replied : 

Pour si peu ne tenez, 
Car si cela seulement vous en garde ! 
J*ai bien pour vous un visage sans nez.* 

We have no knowledge if this offer tempted 
the rigid Calvinist that was to be; but the 
lady was undoubtedly young, and even if 
he had not found her face so remarkably 
beautiful, yet it would have been very differ- 
ent had the invitation come from an old 

♦ . . . Well, if you chose 
With less to be content, don't stick at this. 
I have for you a face without a nose. 

W. F. H. 



THE KISS OF RESPECT 129 

crone, as the well-known saying, " baiser le cut 
de la vieille'' implies the deepest ignominy 
that can befall a man, at any rate a gambler 
— viz., to lose without scoring a point. 

There is a Jutland variant of the story 

about Theodore de Beza : ** I was driving 

one day with Niels Hundepenge, and we 

saw at a distance a woman walking on in 

front. Says Niels, 'Peter, there goes a 

pretty girl ; just see what a figure, and how 

she steps out.* When we got up to her 

we found she was pock-marked and hideous. 

Then says Niels, * Now, my girl, if you 

were only as good-looking in front as you 

are behind, I should want to kiss you.' 

'Well, if you think so,' replied she, 'you 

can kiss mc, you know, where you fancy I 

am best looking."* 

Allow me, in connection with this, to 
call your attention to a peculiarity about 
the Latin word osculum. The first syllable 
OS of course signifies "mouth," the two last, 
on the other hand, mean the correlative 
part on the reverse side of the body. This 
circumstance has been made use of in a 
Latin anecdote about a married lady. An 
importunate suitor asked her for a kiss, 



130 THE KISS 

whereupon she replied that this could not 
be granted, inasmuch as the first of what 
he asked absolutely belonged to her husband, 
but, as she did not wish to be too hard on 
him, he was welcome to have the last : 

Syllaba prima inco dchctur UXa inariio, 
Sume tibi reliquas, non ero dura, duas.* 

In modern times the ceremonious kiss of 
respect has gone clean out of fashion in the 
most civilised countries ; it is only retained 
in the Church, but in all other domains it 
is practically unknown — so unknown, indeed, 
that in many cases the practice would be 
offensive or ridiculous. 

Kissing the earth is another instance of 
such kisses that I shall quote. It plays a 
part in the old stories about Junius Brutus. 
Together with King Tarquins sons he 
journeyed to Delphi to consult the oracle. 
The answer they received was that the 
supreme power would fall to the lot of him 
who first kissed his mother. Brutus then 
made a pretence of stumbling, and as he fell 
he kissed the earth, our common mother. A 

* My first is for my husband, not for you ; 
But you*re right welcome to the other two. 

W. F. H. 



THE KISS OF RESPECT 131 

few years after this, the royal family were 
expelled from Rome, and Brutus and Lucius 
Turquinius were elected consuls. 

People also kissed the earth for joy on 
returning to their native land after a 
lengthened absence. When Agamemnon 
returned from the Trojan War : 

Stepped he forth inwardly glad to the shore of his 

well-loved country, 
Kissing and kissing again his mother earth while the 

scalding 
Tears down his cheeks were coursing, though his heart 

was brimming with blitheness. 

Even nowadays people feel glad at seeing 
their native country again after long absence, 
but they have another way of expressing 
their joy, and, without exaggeration, it would 
be safe to assert that if any one returning 
from a journey wished to emulate Agamemnon, 
that person would undoubtedly be put down 
as mad. 

We find in Holberg (" Ulysses of Ithaca," 
or "A German Comedy") a parody of the 
old usage, where Ulysses says : ** Let us fall 
down, after the old heros fashion, and kiss 
our mother earth." They fall down and kiss 
the ground, but Chilian gets up hurriedly 



132 THE KISS 

and says : ** The deuce ! I don't really under- 
stand the use of these ceremonies. Eugh, 
somebody has been here before — that I can 
plainly perceive." 

The old custom now only survives in certain 
sayings. Frenchmen use the expression baiser 
la terre (to kiss the earth), jeeringly, of a 
person falling ; and the German, die Erde 
kilssen (to kiss the earth), is a euphemistic 
way of saying "die." I may add, for the 
sake of completeness, that kissing the earth 
still occurs sporadically nowadays in the 
sense of the profoundest humility mingled 
with regret. When Raskolnikow, in Dosto- 
jewski's novel of that name, has confided to 
Sonja how he murdered the old usurer's wife, 
he exclaims in his despair : ** And what shall 
I do now?" — **What shall you do now," 
exclaims Sonja, and her eyes flash: ''Get 
up, go hence at once ; station yourself at a 
crossway, kneel down and kiss the earth you 
have defiled, bow down thus before all the 
people, and say to them : * I have committed 
murder.' Then God shall give you new life." 
And, finally, when Raskolnikow has deter- 
mined publicly to acknowledge his crime and 
denounce himself as a murderer, he falls pros- 



THE KISS OF RESPECT 133 

trate on his knees in the middle of the 
market-place, bows down, and, amidst the 
laughter and derision of the bystanders, 
kisses the dirty ground with ecstasy and 
delight. 

In Europe, at least, we no longer kiss the 
ground before the feet of the mighty, any 
more than we salute them by kissing their 
hands or feet ; a bow more or less gracious, 
according to circumstances, serves the same 
purpose generally. Nevertheless, at certain 
courts, such as the Spanish, English, and 
Russian, kissing the hand is still customary 
as a sort of ceremonial salutation ; but its 
practice is usually confined to certain solemn 
occasions. 

Individuals of princely rank excepted, the 
kiss of respect to superiors is to be regarded 
as all but extinct ; but even in the eighteenth 
century, kissing the hem of their garments is 
mentioned as a salutation befitting ladies of 
exalted rank, and in Holbergs Politiske 
Kandest0ber (the Political Pewterer), we see 
how Madame Abrahamsen and Madame 
Sanderus even kissed Gedske on the apron. 

Kissing, as expressive of admiration, still 
undoubtedly occurs, but can scarcely be said 



134 THE KISS 

to be particularly general ; it becomes less 
and less common as we approach our own 
time. 

A half-ironical instance occurs in Moli^re ; 
in Les Femntes Savantes Armande and Phila- 
minte fall into raptures over Vadius* great 
learning. Du grec ! O ciel! du grec ! II 
salt du greCy ma sceur ! (Greek! good 
heavens! Greek! He knows Greek, sister), 
says the one, and the other answers : Du 
grec! quelle douceur! (Greek! how sweet!). 
In their boundless enthusiasm they ask Vadius 
to let them kiss him as a mark of their admira- 
tion. He accepts this salutation very politely, 
if not with any particularly great joy; but 
when he turns to young Henriette, from 
whose lips he is especially desirous of receiv- 
ing so tender an expression of admiration, 
she rejects him quite abruptly with the re- 
mark : ExcuseZ'tnoiy monsieur^ je nentends 
pas le Grec (Excuse me, sir, I don't under- 
stand Greek). 

The pedantic Vadius got just what he de- 
served — a kiss as dry as dust from two 
middle-aged, sexless blue-stockings, which 
nobody begrudges him. On the other hand, 
many, perhaps, will read with envy of the 



THE KISS OF RESPECT 136 

homage received by Benjamin Franklin at 
the French Court. Mme. de Campan, in her 
M4moires, says : ** At one of the splendid 
entertainments given in Franklin's honour, I 
saw how the most beautiful of the three 
hundred ladies present was chosen to place 
a laurel crown on the white locks of the 
American philosopher and imprint a kiss 
on each of the old man's cheeks." 

The kiss of admiration and respect has, 
I suppose, been the longest to survive in the 
form of kissing ladies* hands. Formerly, in 
many countries, it constituted a friendly 
greeting on meeting a lady or saying good- 
bye to her ; but nowadays this custom has 
grown obsolete in most places ; nevertheless 
we have certain literary reminiscences of it. 
In Austria people say Kilss die Hand, gnadige 
Frau, and Sdrut mdna in Roumania, but 
still it is comparatively rare that this expres- 
sion is followed by actual kisses, as was 
formerly the case. Je vous baise les mains is 
now only used in an ironical sense in France. 
Ceremonial kisses, however, still flourish in 
Spain to a marked degree, not only in the 
language of the Court, but also in general 
conversation. When I was first presented 



136 THE KISS 

to a Spanish lady I expressed my gladness 
at making her acquaintance by kissing her 
hand — only, however, by figure of speech — 
but her husband at once pointed out to me 
in a laughing way, that I had failed to 
show her proper respect. One can only kiss 
a Spanish lady s feet : Beso cL usted los pies 
or ci los pies de usted (I kiss your feet), as 
they say. 

Before leaving the subject of the kiss 
reverential I will mention two different ways 
in which it has been used. Formerly it was 
the custom, at least at the French Court, 
for pages to first kiss the articles they were 
to hand to distinguished personages. Henri 
Estienne tells an anecdote about a page who 
had to carry a letter to the Princess of 
Naples. It was expressly enjoined on him 
to kiss it {baiseZ'la), but the page pretended 
he had misunderstood the words, so when 
he had to leave the letter he first kissed the 
unsuspecting princess. 

We find another peculiar form of the kiss 
reverential in the cases when a person kisses 
his own hand before offering it to the guest 
he would especially honour, or before accept- 
ing a present for which he wishes to show 



THE KISS OF RESPECT 137 

his gratitude in an extraordinarily polite 
manner.* 

In an old comedy of Marivaux, '^Harlequin 
poli par CAmoury' a fairy falls in love with 
a rustic lout. She carries him off, entertains 
him in her castle, and tries in every possible 
way to gain his love; but he remains utterly 
callous to all her blandishments, and behaves 
all the time in a most foolish manner. He 
takes a fancy to a valuable ring the fairy 
is wearing ; she removes it from her finger 
and gives it to him, but when he scarcely 
says " Thank you " for it, she says to chide 
him : Mon cher ArlequiUy un beau garpon 
coinme voiis, quand 7ine dame ltd presenle 
qtielque chose^ doit baiser la main en la 
refevant* Arlequin takes hold of the fairy s 
hand and kisses it ; but she corrects him 
again, and says : " He does not understand 
me once, but I like his mistake. It is your 
own hand, you know, that you should kiss."t 

This usage still prevails amongst old 
peasants in Jutland, and is termed receiving 
something with ** kissed hand," or **kiss 

* My dear Arlequin, a handsome lad like you, when a 
l:idy olTers him anything, ought to kiss the hand when he 
receives it. 

t Omitted in the last edition. 



138 THE KISS 

hand." The expression Kusshand is also 
employed in German, and is explained thus : 
*'Gruss, wobei man die eigne Hand klisst 
und dann nach der zu griissenden Person 
hin bewegt oder sie reicht." The same sort 
of greeting is found both in England and 
France. Voltaire tells us that children in 
certain countries are taught to kiss their 
right hand when anybody gives them some- 
thing good. Even at the present day, in 
certain places on the Alps, peasants express 
their thanks by kissing their hand before 
taking what is given to them. 



VI 



THE KISS OF FRIENDSHIP 



Par amistiet Ten baisat en la buche. 

Chanson de Roland, 



For friendship pressed a kiss upon his mouth. 

W. F. H. 



CHAPTER VI 

THE KISS OF FRIENDSHIP 

The kiss is also employed as a conventional 
salutation between persons who only stand on 
a footing of friendship or acquaintance with 
each other. In our northern countries the 
friendly kiss usually occurs only between 
ladies, but in this instance its usage is very 
widely extended. With men and women it is 
properly only allowable when there is a marked 
difference in age between both parties, but, on 
the other hand, it seldom or never takes place 
between men, with the exception, however, of 
royal personages who, on solemn occasions, 
are wont to greet and take leave of each other 
with more or less sincere kisses of greeting and 
farewell. Here we find ourselves again in a 
sphere in which, alas, we have sadly fallen 
away from the good old weiys. In former 
times, to wit, the friendly kiss was very 

141 



142 THE KISS 

common with us between man and man as well 
as between persons of opposite sexes. In 
guilds it was customary for the members to 
greet each other '* with hearty handshakes and 
smacking kisses," and, on the conclusion of a 
meal, people thanked and kissed both their 
hosts and hostesses. In a description of a 
wedding in the olden time in the district of 
Voer in Denmark we read: 

" When they had eaten, the parish clerk got 
up first, put his arms round the parson's neck, 
and kissed him on the mouth, sayino^ : Tak 
for mad, hr. pastor (Thanks for your hospi- 
tality, sir priest). Then the parson planted 
himself against a chest of drawers, and all the 
women, old and young, went up to him, one 
after the other, and kissed him on the mouth. 
Some of the old goodies could not quite reach 
him, for the priest was a big, tall man, and 
they had actually to climb on to his boots, 
though he stooped down to them slightly." 
Peder Havg^rd said that he would not have 
cared much to be in the parson's place, for it 
was a mean and poor country thereabouts, and 
some of the women were very shabbily-dressed 
and dirty-looking. 

If we glance outside Denmark it appears 



THE KISS OF FRIENDSHIP 143 

that the kiss of friendship is considerably in 
vogue. In Iceland it is still a general form 
of salutation, although of late years there is 
said to be a certain falling off in its use ; and 
every one who travels in South Germany and 
Austria can study at the very first railway 
station the different forms of that kind of kiss 
which in those countries is specially used by 
way of leave-taking ; officers and students, 
farmers and merchants, all treat each other to 
sounding kisses, usually on the cheek. One 
can observe the same sort of thing in France, 
but more especially in Italy. I can attest from 
personal experience that it is looked upon as 
the most natural thing in the world for people 
to kiss their intimate friends when saying 
good-bye, a shake of the hand being far too 
cold a leave-taking beneath the warm sky of 
Italy. 

It is, however, undoubted that, speaking 
generally, the custom of kissing, as an ordinary 
greeting, has immensely declined; in ancient 
times and in the Middle Ages it was much 
more frequent than nowadays. 

It was the common practice with the 
Hebrews for acquaintances, when they met, 
to kiss each other on the head, hands, and 



Hi THE KISS 

shoulders ; and it was assuredly with a kiss 
of pretended friendship that Judas betrayed 
his Master. 

Even the Greeks in former times used kiss- 
ing as a common salutation ; not only friends 
and acquaintances kissed each other, but also 
persons who quite accidentally met when they 
were travelling. 

The custom of kissing, however, became 
less general later on. In a discourse of Dion 
Chrysostomus, called I^rom Eubosa, or *'The 
Hunter," is a story of a rustic conihig to the 
city and meeting two acquaintances in the 
assembly, whom he goes up to and kisses. 
^* But," says the rustic, " people laughed pro- 
digiously at my kissing them, and, on that 
occasion, I learnt that it is not customary for 
people of the city to kiss each other." * 

Kissing seems to have been much more in 
vogue with the Romans, amongst whom it 
was the usual custom for people to salute each 
other with a kiss on the hand, the cheek, 
or the mouth. Many even scented their 
mouths in order to render their kisses more 
pleasing — or less unpleasant. Martial laments 

* Omitted in the last edition. 



THE KISS OF FRIENDSHIP 145 

over this usage in a little epigram to Pos- 
thumus : 

What's this that myrrh doth still smell in thy kiss, 
And that with thee no other odour is ? 
*Tis doubt, my Posthumus, he that doth smell 
So sweetly always, smells not very well. 

This kissing of friends gradually became a 
veritable nuisance to the country. Fashion 
ordained that every one should give and 
receive such kisses, but, in reality, every one 
preferred evading them. Martial, in another 
epigram to this same Posthumus, exclaims : 

Posthumus late was wont to kiss 

With one lip, which I loth ; 
But now my plague redoubled is, — 

lie kisses me with both. 

and 

Posthumus' kisses some must have, 

And some salute his fist ; 
Thy hand, good Posthumus, I crave, 

If I may choose my list. 

Under such frightful circumstances people 
had recourse to shifts which seem almost as 
unsavoury as the kisses they would escape : 

Why on my chin a plaster clapped ; 
Besalved my lips, that are not chapped ; 
Philajnis, why ? The cause is this : 
Philaenis, thee I will not kiss. 

K 



146 THE KISS 

But such artifices, however, are of very 
little use ; no one escapes the basiatores 
(kissers). They prowl about the streets and 
market-places ; not even the walls of the 
home, nor even the enforced solitariness 
of the most hidden-places served as a pro- 
tection against them : 

There are no means the kissing tribe to shun, 
They meet you, stop you, after you they run, 
Press you before, behind, to each side cleave, 
No place, no time, no men, exempted leave ; 
A dropping nose, salved lips, can none reprieve. 
Gangrenes, foul running sores, no one relieve ; 
They kiss you in a sweat, or starved with cold, 
Lovers' their mistress' kisses cannot hold ; 
A chair is no defence, with curtains guarded, 
With door and windows shut, and closely warded, 
The kissers, through a chink will find a way, 
Presume the tribune, consul's self, to stay ; 
Nor can the awful rods, or Lictor's mace. 
His stounding voice away these kissers chase. 
But they'll ascend the Rostra, curule chair, 
The judges kiss while they give sentence there. 
Those laugh they kiss, and those that sigh and weep ; 
'Tis all the same whether you laugh or weep ; 
Those who do bathe, or recreate in pool, 
Who are withdrawn to ease themselves at stool. 
Against this plague I know no fence but this : 
Make him thy friend whom thou abhorr'st to kiss. 

All greet one another with kisses ; every con- 
dition of life, every handicraft, found a repre- 



THE KISS OF FRIENDSHIP U7 

sentative amongst the basiatores. When a man, 
in ancient times, was afraid of meeting his 
tailor, it was not so much on account of the 
latter's bill as by reason of his kisses. 

'* Rome," says Martial, *' gives, on ones 
return after fifteen years' absence, such a 
number of kisses as exceeds those given by 
Lesbia to Catullus. Every neighbour, every 
hairy-faced farmer, presses on you with a 
strongly-scented kiss. Here the weaver assails 
you, there the fuller and cobbler, who has 
just been kissing leather ; here the owner of 
a filthy beard, and a one-eyed gentleman ; 
there one with bleared eyes, and fellows 
whose mouths arc defiled with all manner 
of abominations. It was hardly worth while 
to return." 

People kissed whenever they met : morning 
and evening, at all seasons of the year : 
spring and autumn, summer and winter. The 
winter kisses seem to have been especially 
unpleasant, and Martial censures them, in 
the strongest terms, in his epigram to Linus : 

'Tis winter, and December's horrid cold 
Makes all things stark ; yet, Linus, thou lay'st hold 
On all thou meet'st ; none can thy clutches miss ; 
But with thy frozen mouth all Rome dost kiss. 



us THE KISS 

What could'st more spiteful do, or more severe, 
Had'st tiiou a blow o' ih' face, or box o' th' ear ? 
My wife, this time, to kiss me does forbear, 
My daughter, too, however debonaire. 
But thou more trim and sweeter art. No doubt 
Th' icicles, hanging at thy dog-like snout. 
The congealed snivel dangling on thy beard. 
Ranker than th' oldest goat of all the herd. 
The nastiest mouth i' th' town I'd rather greet. 
Than with thy flowing frozen nostrils meet. 
If therefore thou hast either shame or sense. 
Till April comes no kisses more dispense. 

That Martial's epigrams depict the actual 
state of the case without any particular 
exaggeration it may, among other things, be 
inferred from the fact that the Emperor 
Tiberius, according to Suetonius, issued an 
edict against these cotidiana oscula (daily 
kisses). 

The friendly kiss was likewise much in 
vogue in the Middle Ages. 

In La Chanson de Roland the Saracen king 
receives Ganelon with a kiss on the neck, 
and then displayed to him his treasures : 

Quant I'ot Marsilies, si Tad baisiet el' col ; 
Pois, si cumencet ^ uvrir ses tr^sors. 

(603). 

And Ganelon salutes the Saracen chiefs in 



THE KISS OF FRIENDSHIP 149 

the same way, and "they kissed each other 
on face and chin " : 

** Bien serat fait " — li quens Guenes respunt ; 
Pois, se baisierent es vis e es mentuns. 

(625, 628). 

The friendly kiss is, on the whole, pretty 
often mentioned in the Old French epics. 
**Out of friendship he kissed him on the 
mouth " is a verse that frequently recurs : 

Par Vamisiiet Ven baisat en la bucke. 

The kiss of friendship was also exchanged 
between the opposite sexes. It was the 
general custom for ladies to salute with a 
kiss any stranger whether he came as an 
ambassador, expected guest, or a chance 
passer-by. In the old French mystery-play 
of St Bernard de Menton, the Lord of Miolan 
is sitting one day with his wife and daughters 
in the hall of his castle, when a squire steps 
in and announces that some strangers have 
arrived. The lord of the castle receives them 
courteously, bids them welcome in God's 
name, and at once orders his wife do her 
duty to them. She, too, bids them welcome, 
and kisses them ; at last it comes to the 
turn of the little girls, who assure their 



150 THE KISS 

father that they know their duty right well, 
and are even willing to perform it : 

A vostre bon commaiidement 
Les bayserons et festoyrons, 
Trestons le myeulx que nous pourrons, 
Mon seigneur, a vostre talent. 

Which may be rendered thus : 

As it is your orders dear, 

We will kiss and make good cheer. 

All, so far as in us lies, 

Since your wishes that comprise. 

W. F. H. 

Whereupon they kiss the strange gentle- 
men. In the poem of ** Huon de Bordeaux" 
we are told how Huon's mother, the Duchess 
of Bordeaux, receives the French king's 
embassy with kisses. The queen, in Marie 
de France's Lai de Graelan, sends an 
ambassador after Graelan to make his 
acquaintance, and, when he arrives, goes to 
meet him, and kisses him on the mouth. 

In other Romance countries, too, kissing 
serves as a common mode of greeting, which 
fact can be incidentally substantiated by 
means of philology, inasmuch as the Latin 
verb salutare (* to greet ') both in Spanish and 
Roumanian, and partially in French, has 
acquired the meaning of 'to kiss.* 



THE KISS OF FRIENDSHIP 151 

When Abengalvon, in the old Poetna del 
Cid^ meets Minaya Alvar Faflez, he advances 
smilingly towards him in order to kiss him, 
and he "greets" him on the shoulder, "for 
such was his wont " : 

Sonrisando de la boca, ibalo abrazar, 
£n el ombro lo saluda, ca tal es su usaje. 

The expression "to greet on the mouth" 
likewise occurs many times ; but also the 
verb saliidar ('to hail') is also used alone, 
as in the Roumanian sdruta, to express *to 
kiss.' 

Even in the fifteenth and sixteenth centuries 
the friendly kiss flourished in France. When 
Leo Rozmital, the Bohemian nobleman, paid 
his respects to Louis XL at Meung-sur- 
Loire, the king led him to the queen, and 
both she and all the ladies of her court 
kissed him on the mouth. 

We get further information in a letter 
from Annibale Caro dated 29th October, 
1544. It is addressed to the Duke of Palma, 
and describes the visit of the French Queen 
E16onore to the Emperor Charles V. in 
Brussels. "When we met," says he, "the 
ceremony of reception with kissing of the 



162 THE KISS 

ladies was, in the highest degree, interesting ; 
it seemed as if I had been present at the 
Rape of the Sabines. Not only the higher 
nobility, but even all the rest took each his 
lady, and the Spaniards and Neapolitans 
were the most eager. It gave rise to much 
merriment when the Countess of Vertus, 
Charlotte de Pisseleu, was observed to lean 
over her saddle to such an extent, in order 
to kiss the Emperor, that she slid off her 
horse, and kissed the earth instead of His 
Majesty's mouth. The Emperor hurried up 
to her assistance, and with a smile kissed 
her heartily {e ridendo la bacih saporitamente). 
Directly afterwards Duke Ottavio rode up, 
jumped quickly off his horse, and the 
Emperor himself conducted him to the 
Queen's carriage, and there he was presented 
to the distinguished ladies. The Duke kissed 
the Queen's hand and was about to remount 
his charger, but the Emperor called him 
back, and told him that he ought also to 
kiss Mdme. d'Etampes, who was sitting right 
opposite to the Queen in the carriage. Like 
a good Frenchman, he exceeded the Emperor's 
order and kissed her on the mouth." 

A vast quantity of other evidence goes to 



THE KISS OF FRIENDSHIP 

show how general was the friendly 

salutation even during the Renj 

especially among the upper classes. 

Estienne satirises it in his Apolog 

Hdrodote. " Kisses arc allowed," wi 

''m France between noblemen and 

yfhtihtv they do or do not belong 

same family. If a high-born dam 

chuYch, and any fop of her acqu 

com^s, s\iQ must, m conformity with tl 

^YGW'jAXiwg \\\ good society, get up, 

sh^ be absorbed in the deepest devot 

\iiss him on the mouth." 

Even Montaigne expresses his dis 
of such a state of things. '* It is," 
'*a highly reprehensible custom tha 
should be obliged to offer their 
every one who has a couple of lackey 
heels, however undesirable he may 
we men are no gainers thereby, for 
to kiss fifty ugly women to thra 
ones." 

None the less, the friendly kiss 
ground right through the seventee; 
even a part of the eighteenth 
Moliere*s marquesses kiss each othe 
ever they meet ; for instance, in the 



154 THE KISS 

eleventh scene in Les Prdcieuses ridictiles, 
when Mascarille and Jodclct fall into each 
other's arms with many warm kisses. In 
Le Misanthrope Alceste reproaches Philinte 
with embracing and kissing every one, and 
*'when I ask you who it is, you scarcely 
know his name ! " 

Vous chargez la fureur de vos embrassements ; 

Et quand je vous demande apr^s, quel est cet homme, 

A peine pouvez-vous dire comme il se nonime. 

La Bruy^re has, time after time, satirised 
this foolish custom, which, especially at 
Court, seems to have assumed colossal 
dimensions ; but even in middle-class circles 
etiquette required men to salute ladies with a 
kiss. 

In an old comedy entitled Le Gentilhomme 
gziespin a father presents his son, who is extra- 
ordinarily awkward and clumsy. The latter 
does not know how he ought to behave to 
the ladies of the house, so the father in 
despair gives him a dig in the ribs, and 
whispers in his ear : " He's bashful. Kiss 
the lady. One always greets a lady with a 
kiss." 

... II est honteux. L^, baisez done Madame ; 
C^st toujours en baisant qu'on salue une femnie, 



THE KISS OF FRIENDSHIP 165 

MoH^re has made use of this scene in Le 
Malade imaginaire, where Thomas Diafoirus 
pedanticly asks when he is introduced to 
Angelique : Baiserai-je ? (Am I to kiss ?). 

In England we come across pretty nearly 
the same state of thing. Erasmus of 
Rotterdam, in one of his EpistolcB famtltares^ 
expresses his great satisfaction with English 
customs : " When you arrive every one kisses 
you ; at your departure they bid you good- 
bye and kiss you ; you come back, then fresh 
kisses. You are kissed when you meet 
any one, and so, too, when you separate. 
Wheresoever you go everything is filled with 
kisses, and if you have only once tasted how 
delicate these kisses are, and the delicious- 
ness of their savour, you would want, my 
dear Faustus, to be banished to England 
for time and eternity." In another passage, 
where Erasmus is speaking of the state of 
the inns in England, which he mentions in 
terms of unqualified praise, he winds up as 
follows : ** Everywhere at the inns one meets 
with pretty, smiling girls : they come and 
ask for one's soiled clothes ; they wash them 
and soon bring them back again. When 
the travellers are about to resume their 



156 THE KISS 

journey these girls kiss them, and take as 
affectionate a farewell of them as if the latter 
were their brothers or near relations." 

And Holberg in his letter writes : "In 
England it is considered uncourteous to enter 
a house without saluting one's hostess with 
a kiss." 

Even in the Low Countries the friendly kiss 
was much in vogue. Adrianus Horeboord, 
a professor at the University of Leyden, 
has, in a Latin treatise, investigated the ques- 
tion as to whether the custom of allowing 
strangers to kiss young girls, widows, and 
other persons* wives, on paying a visit, can be 
said to be in conformity with the laws of 
chastity. Horeboord s opinion is that such 
practice is in no way objectionable : as a kiss 
can be given without any arricrc pcnsiCy the 
kisses demanded by politeness may be quite 
chaste. 

Erycius Puteanus, the learned Dutch philo- 
sopher, on the contrary, holds that the afore- 
said custom is not without danger — at any 
rate to more sensually-disposed temperaments. 
In a letter on the education of a young 
Italian girl he writes that he would never 
suffer any one to kiss his pupil, adding : " Our 



THE KISS OF FRIENDSHIP 157 

Flemish girls never do so ; they are not so 
ardent. They do not comprehend the lan- 
guage of love in glances and kisses. In the 
matter of Italian girls on the other hand, 
things are quite different, and I teach my 
pupil the speech of our country and our 
customs, kissing excepted." 

The kiss of friendship was so general in 
Germany, even in the eighteenth century, that 
Klopstock could write to a friend in 1750: 
Vergessen sie nicht zu mir auf einen Kaffee 
und auf einen Kuss zu komnten. It seems, 
however, soon to have fallen into disuse. 

As far back as 1747, Lessing had ridiculed 
it in a poem : 

The kiss with which my friend will greet me 
Is not what's rightly termed a kiss, 

But only formal salutation 

Because cold fashion bids him this. 

W. F. H. 



VII 



VARIOUS KINDS OF KISSES 



Einen Kuss in Ehren 
Darf niemand wehren. 

German Proverb, 



No one should take amiss 
An honest-hearted kiss. 

W. F. H. 



CHAPTER VII 

VARIOUS KINDS OF KISSES 

It has been previously shown by numerous 
examples that kissing occupies a promineni 
place in certain ceremonies. It would b< 
easy to multiply instances of this. 

We know from Roman law that the so-callec 
osculum interveniens, which concerned gifts 
was exchanged between engaged couples 
The law enacts that, in the event of one o 
the contracting parties dying before th< 
marriage, only a moiety of the presents an 
to be returned, provided a kiss was exchangee 
at the betrothal, but, if no kiss had been ex 
changed, all the presents were to be returned.* 

* Si ab sponso rebus spoma donatisy intervenienie osculo^ ant 
nuptias hunc vel illam mart contigerity dimidiam partem rerut 
donatarutn eul superstitem pertinere pracipimusy dimidiam a 
dcfuncti vcl de/uncta heredes cuiuslibet gradus sint et quocunqu 
iure successerinty ut donatio stare pro parte media et solvi pr 
parte media videatur: osculo vero non intervenientey sive sponsu 
sive spoftsa obierity totam infirtnari donationem et donatori spom 
sive heredibus eius restitui, 

161 T 



162 THE KISS 

The kiss was regarded as the introduction, 
as it were, to matrimonial cohabitation — tnitium 
consummationis nuptiarum ; it was symbolical 
of marriage — viri et tmdieris conjunctio. Certain 
ancient jurists have even discussed the question 
whether a married woman who has suffered 
herself to be kissed by a stranger has not 
thereby rendered herself guilty of adultery. 

The decree of the Roman law which, so 
far as I know, still partly holds good in Greece, 
is met with again in the Latin countries 
during the Middle Ages. It was incorporated 
in the law of the Visigoths {JLex Romana 
Visigothorurn), and migrated thence to the 
different old Spanish fueros and the old 
French law, in which the word osculmn was 
also used in the learned form oscle. It was 
likewise admitted into the law of the Lombards, 
and Italy is most probably the West European 
country where donatio propter osculum has been 
longest retained. We find, even down to our 
own times, traces of the same in customary laws. 

This is probably the only ceremonial kiss 
that has received legal sanction ; but wherever 
elsewhere we may turn our eyes and investi- 
gate old ceremonies, we constantly find the 
kiss a necessary and important part. 



VARIOUS KINDS OF KISSES 163 

Its usage was, for instance, general at 
weddings. Thomas Platter, who studied at 
the University of Montpellier at the end of 
the sixteenth century, tells us, in his " Diary," 
that the majority of marriages took place in 
private, without witnesses, through fear of 
witchcraft ; though the wedding feast, on the 
contrary, was celebrated in public with a vast 
concourse of guests, and with many merry 
episodes. At the conclusion of the feast the 
bride was divested of her bridal array, amidst 
jokes and raillery, smart young bachelors 
having to take off her garters ; and when at 
last she sat up in bed, clad only in linen, then 
all the guests, male and female, came and kissed 
her on the mouth, and the kisses were followed 
by facetious compliments and good wishes. 

Moreover, at the later ceremony of dubbing 
a knight, the newly-made knight of the 
Golden Fleece was kissed by the master of 
the ceremonies, and had afterwards to kiss 
all the senior knights present. 

At certain academical functions the kiss 
also formed part of the festal ceremony ; in 
the seventeenth century the Dean, when 
degrees were conferred, kissed all the new 
doctors and masters. 



164 THE KISS 

Even in the guilds we meet with the kiss, 
though in a somewhat peculiar form. Hlibertz 
tells us that at the ceremony of admitting a 
member into the Guild of Tanners, the candi- 
date chose for his " Kranzjungfer '* a girl 
who had to be ** fairly a maiden." She 
painted black moustaches on his upper lip, 
and the senior member placed a crown on his 
head. This done, he kissed the latter, removed 
the crown, and decorated him instead with a 
" Jungferkranz." Finally, the senior member 
made a speech to the new member, and gave 
him three boxes on the ears, on which the girl 
kissed him, and washed off his moustaches, 
whilst " Vater " hung a sword to his waist. 

The ceremony of reception into the Guild 
of Carpenters was followed by a feast, at 
which the members, as a sign that they were 
now grown-up, were allowed, on the pay- 
ment of a mark, to kiss the barmaid, who 
was usually the innkeeper's daughter. 

It is easily understood that the kiss like- 
wise came to play a prominent part in many 
different dances and games. 

Kiss-dances were very common during the 
Middle Ages and even later. Montaigne 
describes one that he witnessed at Augsburg 



VARIOUS KINDS OF KISSES 165 

in 1580. **The ladies," said he, "sit in two 
rows along the walls of the room. The gentle- 
men go away and bow to them ; they kiss the 
latter s hands, and the ladies get up, but with- 
out kissing them on the hand. Then each 
gentleman puts his arm round the ladys 
waist, right beneath her shoulder, kisses her, 
and lays his cheek to hers."* Whether it is 
the lady's cheek or mouth that is kissed, he 
omits to state ; but it is certain that kisses 
on the mouth were not uncommon. 

A Swiss traveller who stayed for some 
time in France in the middle of the sixteenth 
century relates that, when he was in Mont- 
pellicr, he was invited to a ball, and there met 
a very beautiful young lady ; but, he adds, 
her nose was a trifle too long, and so her 
partner had great difficulty in kissing her 
mouth, **as is the general custom." 

The kiss-dance has not yet died out in 
Germany ; but it appears no longer to have 
the graceful forms of the Renaissance period, 
if we can trust Fritz Reuters description in 
his Journey to Belgium, At a wedding when 
the kiss-dance is to be held, the parish clerk 
cautiously inquires of the clergyman whether 

* Retranslated from the Danish Text. 



166 THE KISS 

kissing is regarded as unbefitting his priestly 
dignity, but when the answer comes short 
and shrewd, ** Kiss away," he bows to Mrs 
Black and — smack ! — gives her a couple of 
hearty kisses right on her mouth. Madame 
was thoroughly frightened, but that did not 
avail, but every time he swang round with 
her, she got a proper, smacking kiss. 

But it is evident from Romeo and Juliet 
that even in England there were dances in 
which a gentleman was allowed to kiss his 
partner. All know the beautiful words with 
which Romeo claims his right : 

If I profane with my unworthiest hand 

This holy shrine, the gentle sin is this : 
My lips, two blushing pilgrims, ready stand 

To smooth that rough touch with a tender kiss. (I. 5.) 

One can still take the same liberty at 
Christmastide under the mistletoe. I know a 
young English lady who was offended with an 
American gentleman who did not dare to avail 
himself of his privilege, because he thought 
that this custom was obsolete in Europe. 

Kissing in our time still plays an important 
part in France in the refrains of dance songs. 
Le Botcguet de ma Mie ends with : 

Bell* bergfere, embrasse-moi, 
Embrasse, embrasse, embrasse 1 



Various kinds of kisses 167 

And in Ramenez vos MoutonSy Berglre, is 
sung by way of conclusion : 

Tombez k genoux, 
Jurez devant tous. 
D'etre uii jour epoux 
Et embrassez-vous.* 

There is, I suppose, no doubt that in these 
games the kiss is given and taken, as 
the dramaiis personce are generally children, 
but what takes place when adults amuse 
themselves with these rondes, I do not know ; 
but I consider it probable that the gentleman 
will demand as his due a kiss, at any rate on 
the cheek. There also exists an old ronde 
a baiscrs, which is very characteristic and 
merry. In this it is the lady who has to take 
the first step : 

Madame, entrez dans la danse^ 
Regardez-en la cadence, 
Et puis vous embrasserez 
Celui que vous aimerez.t 



* Now down on your knees fall, 
And promise straightway 
To be wife and husband, 
And then kiss away. W. F. H. 

f Madame, join the dancing throng, 
Listen to their measured song ; 
But remember, for the rest, 
You shall kiss whom you love best. W. F, H. 



168 tHE KtSS 

As the living expression of the warmest 
and sincerest human feelings kissing has been 
credited, in the world of fairy tales and super- 
stition, with a considerable curative and pro- 
phylactical power. 

We have seen, in the old sagas and ballads, 
how enchantments are broken by means of a 
kiss ; we have seen how holy men in the 
legends restore the sick to health by means 
of a kiss, etc. Kissing has, on the whole, 
influenced popular credulity to a large extent, 
and of the numerous superstitious notions 
concerning it 1 only quote some few : 

If you would protect yourself against 
lightning you should make three crosses 
before you, and kiss the ground three times. 
(Germany.) 

If you want to have luck in gambling you 
must kiss the cards before the game begins. 
(France.) 

If you have the toothache you should kiss a 
donkey on his chops. (Germany.) This very 
efficacious advice is found as far back as Pliny. 

If you drop a bit of bread on the floor you 
must kiss it when you pick it up. The same 
respect is also to be shown to books you 
have dropped. (Denmark, Germany.) 



VARIOUS KINDS OF KISSES 169 

According to Danish superstition, it is a 
bad omen when the first person you meet of 
a morning is an old woman ; nevertheless, 
you can ward off all evil consequences by 
giving her a kiss. Evil must be expelled by 
evil. 

People kiss little children when they have 
knocked themselves, in order to take away 
the pain ; they must ** kiss them well again," 
as it is termed, or, as Englishmen say, "kiss 
the place and make it well." 

The Greenland mother, who does not \/ 
understand kissing as expressive of love, 
kisses her sick child on the breast, shoulders, 
hips, and navel to restore it to health. 

As the loving kiss of a living human 
creature brings life, health, and happiness, 
so it is thought, on the other hand, that 
kisses of a supernatural being bring destruc- 
tion. 

In Lucian's True History there is a 
description of a perilous journey to the 
realms of fancy. In one of these the 
travellers came upon a remarkable vineyard 
wherein all the vines at the bottom were 
green and luxuriant, but those above had the 
shape of women. "They greeted us, as we 



170 THE KISS 

drew nigh, and bade us halt. Some of us 
kissed them on the mouth, and those who 
were kissed lost their understanding and 
reeled about like drunken men. But worse 
befell those who had suffered themselves to 
be embraced by these women ; they were 
powerless to extricate themselves from the 
latter's arms, and we beheld their fingers 
changed into boughs and twigs."* 

I will here call your attention to the 
Roumanian song about cholera, which comes 
in the shape of an ugly old woman to Vtlcu, 
and Vilcu entreats it thus : ** Take my horse, 
take my weapons, but give me still some 
days so I may once more see my children, 
which are as dear to me as the light of the 
sun." But the old woman stretches forth 
her bony arms, folds Vtlcu to her bosom, 
presses her pallid lips to his, and, in a death- 
dealing kiss, takes his life, whereupon she 
departs with a mocking laugh. The Rou- 
manian text is here very strong : 

Gur& pe gur^ punea, 
Buze pe buze lipia, 
Zilele i le sorbia. 

* Retranslated from the Danish of the Text. 



VARIOUS KINDS OF KISSES 171 

Apo! cloanza ear ridea, 
Cu zilele purcedea, 
Si voKnicul mort c&dea. 

Even a spectres kiss brings death. 
In an English variant of the ballad of 
Leonora, Margaret says to her dead bride- 
groom, who is knocking at her door at 
night : " Come and kiss me on the cheek 
and chin." — " Perhaps I shall come to thee," 
he replies, but : 

If I shou'd come within thy bower, 
I am no mortal man ; 
And should I kiss thy rosy lips, 
Thy days will not be long. 

I shall also call your attention, in connec- 
tion with the foregoing, to a curious old 
story of the venomous girl. 

A young maiden had from her tenderest 
years been reared on all the most deadly 
poisons. Her beauty was marvellous, but 
her breiith was so poisonous that it killed 
everybody who came near her. She was sent 
to the palace of Alexander the Great, as the 
king s enemies reckoned on his falling in love 
with her and dying in her arms. When the 
king saw her he at once wanted to make 



172 THE KISS 

her his mistress ; but the shrewd Aristotle 
suspected treachery. He restrained the king, 
and had a criminal who had been sentenced 
to death sent for. The criminal was made 
to kiss the girl in presence of the king, and 
he fell prone on the ground, poisoned by her 
breath, like one struck by lightning. 

This story can be traced to India. It 
found its way into several mediaeval story- 
books and attained great popularity. The 
monks made use of it in their sermons, and 
gave it an allegorical interpretation : Alex- 
ander was the good, trustful Christian ; 
Aristotle was the conscience ; the venomous 
girl, incontinence, which comprehends every- 
thing that is poisonous to the soul ; and the 
criminal is the wicked man who pursues the 
lusts of the flesh and suffers his punishment. 
" Let us, therefore, abstain from all such 
things if we wish to reach Paradise," is the 
moral that the monk draws from it at the 
close of his sermon. 

In conclusion I will quote several expres- 
sions to which kissing has given rise : 

A lady's hat which was fashionable in 
England in 1850, and which had no brim to 
it, got the name of Kiss-me-quick. In con- 



VARIOUS KINDS OF KISSES 173 

tradistinction to this, the old-fashioned Danish 
hats with prominent brims were called Kiss- 
me-if-you-can. We have a modern variant in 
the Salvation lasses' Stop-kissing-me hat. 

In France, during the last century, there 
was a colour of the name of Baise-moi ma 
mtgnonnej called in England *' heart Vease " : 
Look-up-and-kisS'tne^ Kiss-me-at-the-garden- 
gatCy KisS'tne-erC'I-rise ox Jtimp'Up'and'kisS'me. 

The verb *' to kiss " is often used in a figura- 
tive sense, e.g., the Italians say of one who 
likes drinking, *' He kisses the flask " {Bacia il 
fiasco) ; the Germans say of mean people, 
**They kiss the farthing" (JDen Pfennig 
kussen) ; the English too speak of a penny- 
kisser. 

This figurative meaning is not, however, 
confined to jocose expressions and phrases ; 
on the contrary, it occurs perhaps more 
frequently in serious prose. 

Our whole life, lived in love to our neighbour 
and nature, is nothing more than one long kiss. 

Kaalund somewhere says : 

A babe was I not long ere this, 

But time too swiftly slips ; 

And that is why I press a kiss 

So warmly on life's lips. 

W. F. H. 



174 THE KISS 

A similar figurative use is extraordinarily 
common with the poets. H. C. Andersen, in 
Goose-grass, says of the lark that it flies past 
the tulip and other aristocratic flowers only to 
light on the sward by the humble goose-grass, 
which it kisses with its beak, and for which it 
sings its joyous song. The other poets re- 
present the waves as kissing the white beach, 
the bees, the scented flowers ; and the ears of 

corn in the fields as heaving beneath the warm 
kisses of the sun s golden rays. The sun s 
kisses are oscula sancta ; every creature shares 
in them, for they are the most beautiful ex- 
pression of God's love. Ingemann sings in a 
morning hymn : 

The sun looks down on hut and hall, 
On haughty king and beggar weeping, 

Beholds the great ones and the small, 
And kisses babes in cradles sleeping. 

W. F. H. 



VIII 



THE ORIGIN OF KISSING 



Les coututnes, quelque ^tranges qu'elles deviennent parfois 
K la longue, ont g^n^ralement des commencements tr^s simples. 

Max Muller. 

Usages, however strange they may sometimes become in the 
long run, have generally very simple beginnings. — TrafixJated 
from the above. 



CHAPTER VIII 



THE ORIGIN OF KISSING 



With most civilised and many uncivilised 
nations kissing is the natural expression of 
love and its kindred emotions. 
^How can it be explained that a kiss has 
succeeded in getting so deep and compre- 
hensive a significance? How can a trivial 
movement of the lips interpret our innermost 
feelings in so eloquent a way that there is not 
a language which has at its command words 
approaching to it in argumentative power ? 

Are we face to face with something primitive, 
or something conventional and derivative ? Is 
it as natural to kiss when we are transported 
with love as it is to smile when we are mirthful, 
or weep when we are sad ? In other words, is 
Steele right when he says, in strict conformity 
with a Cypriot folk-song previously quoted, 
that " nature was its author, and it began with 
the first courtship ? '%/ 



178 THE KISS 

I shall try to answer this question in the 
following pages, but, nevertheless, I wish at once 
to state most expressly that we are now ap- 
proaching ground where we know nothing, and 
where no one can with certainty know any- 
thing. We can only advance more or less likely 
hypotheses. 

In the first place, it is important to bear in 
mind that there are many races of people who 
are quite ignorant of kissing as it is generally 
understood. Thus it is unknown in a great 
part of Polynesia, in Madagascar, and among 
many tribes of negroes in Africa, more particu- 
larly among those which mutilate their lips. 
W. Reade, in one of his books of travel, tells us 
of the horror which seized a young African 
negress when he kissed her. Kissing is like- 
wise unknown amongst the Esquimaux and the 
people of Tierra del Fuego. Certain Finnish 
tribes appear, from what B. Taylor tells us, not 
to practise it much. In his Northern Travel 
he relates that ** while both sexes bathe 
together in a state of complete nudity, a kiss is 
regarded as something indecent." A Finnish 
married woman, on being told by him that it 
was the usual custom for husband and wife to 
kiss each other, angrily exclaimed, ** If my 



THE ORIGIN OF KISSING 179 

husband were to attempt such a thing, faith, I 
would warm his ears in such a way that he 
would feel it for a whole week." 

If the question arises as to what these people 
substitute for kissing, the fact is well-known 
that, amongst uncivilised races, there is an 
endless number of different ways of salutation ; 
some smack each other on the arms or stomach, 
others blow on each other s hands, others again 
rub their right ear and put out their tongue, 
etc., etc. Here, however, we must confine 
ourselves to the salutations which are sug- 
gestive of kissing. 

In many places people are in the habit of 
saluting with their noses. This is the so-called 
Malay kiss, which consists in rubbing or 
merely pressing ones nose against another 
person's nose. This nose-salute is found among 
the Polynesians, Malays, Esquimaux, certain 
negro tribes in Africa — in short, just among the 
majority of races which are ignorant of kissing 
as we understand it. 

Darwin thus describes the Malay kiss : 
*'The women squatted with their faces up- 
turned ; my attendants stood leaning over them, 
laid the bridge of their noses at right angles over 
theirs, and commenced rubbing. It lasted some- 



\y 




180 THE KISS 

what longer than a hearty hand-shake with us. 
During this process they uttered a grunt of 
satisfaction." * The French savant Gaidoz, who 
has also described this custom, remarks, ** I 
have many times observed that cats which are 
fond of one another greet each other in this 
way ; and I myself once had a cat which always 
tried to squeeze its nose against mine as a 
mark of affection." * 

Everything is in favour of this nose-salute 
\ being a very primitive custom, and its origin 
may be sought beyond the sense of touch ; no 
doubt, in the sense of smell. 

Spencer has arrived at the following con- 
clusions : The sheep bleats after her little 
lamb which has run away. It sniffs at several 
lambs that are skipping about near her, and at 
last recognises her own by means of the sense 
of smell, and undoubtedly feels great delight 
at recognising it. In consequence of assiduous 
repetitions of this a certain relation is developed 
between the two factors, so that the smell of 
the lamb excites joy in the sheep. 

As every animal has its peculiar smell, so, 
too, has every human being. When the 
patriarch Isaac grew old his eyes began to 

* Retranslated from the Danish Version in the Text. 



THE ORIGIN OF KISSING 181 

get dim, and he could not see. He wished to 
bless his eldest son, Esau, but Jacob deceived 
him by clothing himself in his brother's gar- 
ments, and giving himself out as the latter. 
Isaac then said to him : ** Come near now and 
kiss me, my son." And he came near and 
kissed him, and he smelled the smell of his 
raiment, and blessed him, and said : ** See 
the smell of my son is as the smell of a field 
which the Lord hath blessed." 

The sense of the smell peculiar to some 
one we are fond of is capable of exciting 
pleasure. Timkowski writes of a Mongol 
father that the latter time after time smelt 
his youngest son's head. This mark of 
paternal tenderness serves with the Mongols 
instead of kisses. In the Philippine Islands, 
the sense of smell is so developed that the 
inhabitants, by simply sniffing at a pocket- 
handkerchief, can tell to whom it belongs ; 
lovers who are separated send one another 
presents of bits of their linen, and, in their 
absence, keep each other in mind by often 
inhaling each other s scent. 

That the delicate perfume that exhales from 
a woman s body plays an important part in 
love affairs even with modern civilised nations 



182 THE KISS 

is too well-known to require more than a 
passing mention on my part. 

Certain races of mankind now actually 
salute each other by smelling ; they apply 
their mouth and nose to a person's cheek, 
and draw a long breath. In their language 
they do not say ** Give me a kiss," but '* Smell 
me." The same sort of kiss is also met with 
among the Burmese ; and with many Malay 
tribes the words ** smell" and ** salute" are 
synonymous. Other races do not confine 
themselves to smelling each other's faces, but 
sniff their hands at every salutation. 
^ Alfred Grandidier, a French traveller, says 
of the nose-kiss in Madagascar : ** It always 
excites the merriment of Europeans, and yet 
it has its origin in an extremely refined idea. 
The invisible air which is continually being 
breathed through the lips is to savages, not 
only, as with us, a sign of life, but it is also an 
emanation of the soul — its perfume, as they 
themselves say — and, when they mingle and 
suck in each other's breath and odour, they 
think they are actually mingling their souls." *^ 

Then the origin of the nose-kiss, it seems, 
undoubtedly ought to be sought — at any rate 

* Retranslated from the Danish Version in the Text. 



THE ORIGIN OF KISSING 183 

partly — in the sense of smell. The love of 
another human being involves, as a conse- 
quence, ones loving everything belonging to 
this other beiiig; and this love is shown in 
casu by drinking in his or her breath, whereby, 
little by little, a peculiar nose-salutation is 
very ingeniously developed, which, naturally, is 
capable of gradually assuming various con- 
ventional forms. 

Now we will proceed to the kiss proper — 
that on the mouth. How can its origin be 
explained } * 

^pTt does not seem very rational to assume 
that the motion of the muscles in breathing 
should of itself be the natural, purely physical 
reflex of a feeling of love in the same way as, 
for instance, certain half-spasmodic contrac- 
tions of several muscles in the upper part of the 
face can be the immediate expression of wratKl 

I do not believe either that the mere con- 
tact of the lips with another person's face was 
originally sufficient to express •' 1 love you.*' 

* Naturally, I am not concerned here with the various ex- 
planations given by the poets as to the origin of the kiss. 
Gressner, in an idyll of Daphnis and Chloe, has told us 
how both the lovers observed the sport of the doves in the grove 
and then tried to imitate it by pressing their mouths together as 
the doves do their beaks. 



184 THE KISS 

Naturally, the longing to touch the beloved 
one's body, to approach it as closely as pos- 
sible, is a very essential manifestation of erotic 
emotion ; but so far as the contact of the lips 
is concerned, there is reason for assuming 
that, originally, without its being the direct 
object, it had been, moreover, and perhaps 
in an equally high degree, a means of attaining 
a definite sensual gratification — a gratification 
that can be realised by the co-operation of 
the lips and mouth. 

As the nose - salutation partly originates 
in smell, so the mouth salutation may, to 
a certain extent* at least, have its origin 

* Besides the passive or receptive element of the kiss, which 
is essentially the object of my investigation, there is also, as we 
have previously noticed, an active element which must not be 
overlooked, viz., the contact and muscular sensation at the pres- 
sure. During the erotic transport, which excites the desire for 
something further of a brutal and violent nature, the body 
trembles with powerful muscular tension, and a pressure or bite 
of the mouth is one of the forms by which the passion of love 
finds expression. It is difficult, in these pages, to go further 
into this aspect of the kiss, which is regarded by certain 
philosophers as the main one, which it really is in respect 
to certain kisses under certain circumstances ; but there are 
other kisses which are equally so originally, and in which the 
passive element seems to me the most essential. The origin of 
the love-kiss ought scarcely to be sought in any single source, 
whether in the sense of touch or in that of taste and smell com- 
bined. Unquestionably both these elements co-operate in its 
production, but under constantly varying conditions, jqst 



THE ORIGIN OF KISSING 185 



in taste, or — which is even more probabK 
in both smell and taste ? These latter, as you 
know, are very closely related to each other. 

The dog shows his joy at his master's 
presence by licking the latter s hand. Why 
is this? It would not, I suppose, be too rash 
to assume that he as good as " tastes " him ; 
loving his master, he therefore loves the taste 
and smell peculiar to him. 

The cow licks her calf, and in this one 
may presumably see the expression of a feel- 
ing which is to some extent satisfied by this 
action. And why so.^ Undoubtedly by re- 
cognising by the tongue (and nose) the taste 
(and smell) peculiar to the calf 

Now, is it not exceedingly probable that 
the human kiss, in its original form, can, as 
to its passive element, be accounted for in an 
identical way, viz., as a purely sensual assimila- 
tion, by means of the nerves of taste and smell, 
of another persons peculiar qualities with 
respect to gusius and odor? These qualities 
have probably been much more conspicuous 
in primitive mankind than nowadays, just as 

as the active or the passive element predominates, the kiss 
accompanies and interprets according to the erotic phase. In 
what follows I shall confine myself exclusively to the receptive 
element in the kiss. 



186 THE KISS 

it is quite certain that its faculty of taste and 
smell were far more developed than ours. 

And have we not still, especially in the 
love-kiss, but also in kisses between women, 
very numerous representatives of the primitive 
kiss, which I should like to term the ** taste- 
kiss." I have many times pointed out, in the 
preceding pages, the part which taste plays in 
kissing; and I shall now add what I have 
often heard young girls say to a lady they had 
kissed amorously : ** Your kisses taste so nice." 

From being a natural expression for love 
the sucking, tasting kiss has, in course of time, 
become reduced to nothing more than a simple 
inspiratory movement of the lips, which, by 
analogy, has come to express many other feel- 
ings, such as gratitude, admiration, compas- 
sion, tenderness, etc. It has become at 
length so degraded as to be used as a purely 
conventional salutation. 

If this reasoning be correct, then the mouth- 
kiss, in the course of its development, presents 
a perfect parallel with the nose-kiss. Both 
these forms of greeting were originally closely 
allied, but the mouth-kiss had better conditions 
for development than the nose-kiss. It has 
become a salutation of a considerably higher 



THE ORIGIN OF KISSING 187 

sort, and whenever savage tribes come into 
contact with civilised nations the nose-kiss is 
gradually discarded. Such, for instance, was 
the case in Madagascar. There is no doubt 
that savages can express very deep emotions 
by the nose-kiss. A French missionary tells 
the story of how he was received when he 
went back to the island of Pomotu : ** When 
we approached the country all the population 
assembled on the beach. They had harpoons 
in their hands, for they imagined we were 
enemies ; but, as soon as they saw my cassock, 
they shouted, 'That's the Father, away with 
the harpoons,' and when we reached the shore 
they all rushed forward to kiss mc by rubbing 
their noses against mine, according to the 
custom of that country. The ceremony was 
not very agreeable to me, and I was not 
altogether pleased at having to take part in 
it."* Civilised people, on the other hand, 
regard the nose-kiss as something highly 
ludicrous, and I doubt if any poet has the 
power of casting a halo of romance over it. 

The mouth - kiss, on the contrary, is 
redolent of the purest and most delicate 
poesy. A German minnesinger rhapsodises 

• Retranslated from the Danish Version in the Text, 



188 THE KISS 

thus : ** The radiant sun is darkened before 
mine eyes when I behold the roses that 
bloom on my darling's mouth." 

"He who can pluck these roses may rejoice 
in the depth of his heart. Many are the 
roses I have beheld, but never have I looked 
on any so splendid," 

** How beauteous are the roses one gathers 
in the valley ; nathless her delicate, ruddy 
lips conjure up thousands that are lovelier 
still." 



L'ENVOI 

Wherefore, methinks, let ev'ry man 

Kiss as he knows best, will, should, can ; 

But I and my beloved know this : — 

How we ought properly to kiss. — Paul Fleming. 

W. F. H. 



Printed by 

Oliver A Boyd 

Bdintmigh. 



of/^?'/^ 



Tliis book is a preservation photocopy 

produced on Weyerhaeuser add free 

Cougar Opaque 50# book weight paper, 

which meets the requirements of 

ANSVNISO Z39.48-1992 (permanence of paper) 

Preservation photocopying and binding 

by 

Acme Bookbinding 

Qiarlestown, Massachusetts 

m 

1994 



f 




3 2044 021 577 085 



WIDENER LIBRARY 

Harvard CoUege, Cambridge, MA 02138: (617)495-2413 



If the item is recalled, tlie borrower will be notified of 

the need for an earlier return. (Non-receipt of overdue 

notices does not exempt the bftiywf r frnm ftvf rduf fines.) 




Thank you for hewing us to preserve our coUecdon! 



.,W «)\.y>'MV, Ik**- 






^