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LEILA ADA,

THE JEWISH CONVERT

BY

OSBORN W. TRENERY HEIGHWAY.
EEYISED BY THE EDITOR.

*' A sacred glory rested on her brow,
And mantled o'er her cheek ; a lovely smile
Sat like a cherub on her faded lips :
A solemn rapture was that dying scene ;
Celestial spirits fanned it with their wings-
It breathed the air of heaven."— Leila Ada.

PHILADELPHIA:
PRESBYTEEIAN BOARD OF PUBLICATION,

No. 265 CHESTNUT STREET.

17694

Entered according to Act of Congress in the year 1S53,
Br A.Vr. MITCHELL, M.D.,

in the Office of the Clerk of the District Court for the Eastern Dis-
trict of Peunsvlvauia.

Slote & MooxET, Stereotypers.

COTsTENTS.

■4-

PAC^H

Introductory Remarks.

CHAPTER I.
Introduction — Leila's Character and Pursuits — The Mishna —
The Talmud 9

CHAPTER XL
Leila accompanies her Father to the Holy Land — Their Jour-
ney— Cologne— The Rhine — The Juras — Geneva — Chillon —
Lausanne — Gibbon 24

CHAPTER IIL
The Journey continued — Bernese Oberland — Simmenthal —
Staubbach— Wengern Alp— An Avalanche— The Simijlon.... 26

CHAPTER IV.
The Journey continued — Milan — Verona — Venice— Ferrara —
Bologna— The Apennines — Florence— Rome— The Coliseum
—Naples 47

CHAPTER V.
The Journey continued— Athens — Mistra — The Morea— Sparta
— The ^gean Sea — Constantinoide GO

CHAPTER VL

The Journey continued— Antioch — Jerusalem — Account of the
Holy Land — The Return Home— Alexandria— Malta — A

Tempest ''^

(iu)

IV CONTENTS.

PAGE

CHAPTER VII.
Leila's Conversion 82

CHAPTER VIII.
Leila's Letter to her Father 92

CHAPTER IX.
Leila's Letter to her Father concluded 108

CHAPTER X.

Conversations between Leila and her Father — Leila is sent to
her Uncle 121

CHAPTER XL

Treatment of Leila by her Uncle^Her Trials — Character of
Leila's Cousin 143

CHAPTER XIL
The Final effort to Reclaim her — Cut off from her Nation —
Her acquaintance with Miss H, — Returns to her Father —
"How soon we fade !" 151

CHAPTER XIIL
Evanishings 167

CHAPTER XIV.
"We all do fade as a Leaf" 193

CHAPTER XV.
Leila's Dying Hours — The Closing scene 203

CHAPTER XVL
Leila's Poems, &c 208

INTRODUCTORY REMARKS.

- — h

The young lady wlio is the subject of this memoir
waSj as its title indicates, a Jewess by birth. The
majestic beauty of the religion of Jesus has, in all ages,
obtained its finest representatives from the house of
Israel : and among the many lovely examples of sub-
lime attainment in the divine life made by Hebrew
Christians, Leila Ada is not one of the least conspicu-
ous. What she appears in the record of her now pre-
sented, that she was in real life, a pure, holy, humble
Christian — a Christian hallowed, sublimed, etherealized
by the influences of the Holy Spirit.

Leila is a character of undoubted loveliness : but she
is not in the ver?/ least degree an ideal. We have been
scrupulously exact in our descriptions and comments
throughout. We have written from knowledge obtained
through personal acquaintance of the dearest kind.

Leila was one of those fair and flower-like natures,
which at intervals rise to cheer us along the dusty high-
ways of life; but she was a plant which flourished in
1^ ■ (v)

VI INTRODUCTORY REMARKS.

the shade, and her real worth was known to very few.
Her natural abilities were of the highest order, and she
had cultivated them with the strictest care ; so that had
God seen it fitting to spare her life and call her to a
more public situation, she would have occupied no
humble position among those nobled-souled and intel-
lectual women who are an honour to our country. She
was one'of the loveliest flowers that ever gleamed in the
cold atmosphere of a world of sin ; a flower fragile in its
pensile form, delicate in its tender purity, spiritual in
its beauty ; too frail to live amidst these tempestuous
clouds of earth, and only at home in the kindlier soil
and among the stormless skies of " the better land.''

All Leila's papers are given verbatim et literatim.
"Write incorrectly she could not. A thoughtful, reflec-
tive mind she always had. Although her language is in
some places difi'use and inartificial, we could not feel at
liberty to alter it. We felt (and perhaps our feeling
may be smiled at — let it be even so,) that Leila would
never have consented to any similar mode of procedure
while she lived; to be truthfully exact was always the
rule of her conduct ; and that if she was cognisant of
our occupations now that she was in the skies, she
would regard such disguise with even less allowance
still. It is almost unnecessary for us to say that she
never expected anything she wrote would be given to
the world.

INTRODUCTORY REMARKS. Vli

We have writteOj we trusty with a single heart — with
a pure intention that Grod may be glorified. To him
Leila was indebted for whatever she was. That in every
respect she fully realized the picture of her which we
have drawn, we are assured. We say this from a calm,
unprejudiced, deliberate judgment. Were we to speak
as we feelj we should be at once inclined to say, that
her sweet Christianity could be estimated at its proper
value only in the hearts of those who knew her while
she was upon the earth — that any attempt to give in
writing an adequate idea of her character must of neces-
sity fall short.

Finally, we again repeat that we have nowhere
written one word, look, or expression which is not most
exact to the truth. Our dear relative, Miss H. {the
Miss H. whose friendship with Leila is noticed in the
Memoir itself,) once said to us — ^' Sucli a life, and s,uch
a death ! You cannot possibly give it a beauty which
it did not really possess.^'

OsBOEN W. Tbenery Heighway.
London, July, 1853.

LEILA ADA,

THE JEWISH CONVERT

CHAPTER I.

INTRODUCTION — LEILA'S CHARACTER AND PURSUITS — THE MISHNA-—

THE TALMUD.

The West of England abounds in scenes of quiet
and picturesque beauty. Its shores are girded by tall
gray cliffs, bold headlands, numerous islets, and large
caves hollowed out and draped with sea-weeds by the
musical waves of the Atlantic ; while the inland scenery
is rich in hills and valleys, dells and dingles, woods and
meadows, combined in forms of surpassing loveliness.
Crystal streamlets wind amongst quivering aspens ; and
glide, breaking into fall and rapid, and murmuring with
a sweet complaining eloquence as though they were of
life.

Amidst one of the sweetest of these scenes, and near
the southern coast of Cornwall, there is an ancient-
looking mansion, soft and tranquil in its elegant sim-
plicity, and removed far away from the smoke and stir
of earth. It stands in a deep but most lovely valley,
between a line of picturesque eminences. Embosomed
amid lofty and luxuriant trees, and surrounded by a

(9)

10 LEILAADA,

verdant lawn thickly dotted with beds of rich flowers, it
impresses the mind as the very repose of peace and
beauty. Several of the windows are partially hidden
by festoons of luxuriant ivy; while roses, jessamines,
and other sweet-scented plants and creepers, have
thickly interlaced the open trellis-work of the balcony
which encloses the door.

IMany a time and oft have we wandered at sunrise
over the velvet green sward, and in the noble gardens
attached to the house, seeking to learn the life, the
freshness, the purity, the joy of this little Eden. And
then we went on to the side of the clear streamlet, and
sat down by its little gushing waves. Each had its
own separate being ; they varied in form — one pure and
glassy reflected an unbroken sunbeam ; another dashed
it into a thousand glittering spangles, but they all came
from the same deep fountain. They all rejoiced in the
same light; they all hasted on their happy race to the
same wide ocean. And ever, as they flowed, soft voices
like a spirit-melody met our ears ; purity, life, and joy,
must produce sweet tones of harmony.

A romantic and shady road encircles the valley, and
passing in front of the house, enters an avenue of giant
oaks, which grow upon the borders of a luxuriant forest.
Between this avenue, and a double row of chestnut and
walnut trees which mark the margin of the lawn in that
direction, runs the beautiful little river to which we
have just adverted. Towards the east a lofty hill throws
up its huge body — its sloping sides covered with lovely
orchards, and long rich grass, and flocks of sheep.

Several pretty nests of trees grow in the little park
which adjoins the house, and beneath them are some

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 11

tastefully arranged seats. And often, after wearying
herself in frolics with the goat and her kid, that lived
in a small paddock separated from the lawn by a ring
fence, the subject of this memoir has reposed herself
upon one of these seats, and gazed upon the loveliness
of nature, and watched the majestic glories attendant
upon the setting sun.

Before taking possession of this mansion, A. T ,

Esq., had buried the wife of his youth; and on coming
to this charming retreat, he and an only and lovely
daughter, named Leila, lived in comparative seclusion
from the world. He knew no happiness independent
of his child, for all his enjoyment consisted in promoting
her interest and gratification. She was, indeed, the
very being to excite the most tender lavishment of pa-
ternal love. Beauty surrounded her as a mantle, but
her cultivated mind, and amiable disposition, threw
around her an influence superior to any of the short-
lived fascinations of the body. In her conduct and
manner there was a freshness of innocence, and a win-
ning grace which could not fail to arrest the interest
of every beholder. She was highly accomplished, and
could read and write several languages with fluency.
The idol of her fond father, he loved her tenderly — a
feeling which she as tenderly reciprocated. Being of the
seed of Abraham, he had educated her in the strictest
principles of the Jewish ritual, and felt the most intense
satisfaction in witnessing her early seriousness and devo-
tion. To her religion he thought her an ornament.

For our slight knowledge of the early part of Leila's
life, we are principally indebted to a series of papers
written by herself, and entitled, " Keflections.'' A few

12 LEILAADA,

references to it are also made in her diary and corres-
pondence. From these sources we learn that a leading
characteristic in the earliest development and exercises
of her mind, was an ardent thirst for truth. It is also
evident that from her earliest years she felt the draw-
ings of the Holy Spirit, and had an anxious desire for
her eternal salvation. And it is painful, yet pleasing,
to witness the deep struggles of a soul whose whole wish
is simply to be a true and accepted servant of the living
God, yet surrounded by the exclusive spirit and dead-
ening influences of Judaism. It never appears, how-
ever, that through the whole course of her childhood,
and the first years of more thoughtful youth, she had
any misgiving respecting the truth of the Jewish belief.
Her conviction, upon this point, was doubtless height-
ened, in her maturer years, by her deep acquaintance
with the Eastern writings. From her conversation and
reflections it is evident that the fanciful and mystic lore
of these, joined to a supposition that she observed coin-
cidences in approaching changes, greatly strengthened
her belief in the approaching advent of the ^' Murdah,''
or ^^ Good One'' — the Messiah of the Scriptures. But
the dawn of a brighter day was coming.

Her character, even in childhood, was thoughtful and
reserved ; she was always disposed to be grave rather
than gay. In adverting to this phase of her disposition,
we cannot do better than use her own language ; we
therefore extract from her diary the following reflection :
^* I enjoy solitude much ; my heart delights in its own
company, and finds this a richer enjoyment than any
which can be had in busy life. It is an important mat-
ter to feel in no way embarrassed, because excluded

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 13

from the bustling joy of social life. Really^ I am in no
way indebted to external sources of amusement • in
contemplating God, in nature, I have opened a mine of
happiness which is indescribable. Indeed, I am rather
unsocial ; I do not like company ; I am quite miserly in
selecting the sources of my happiness. To hold sweet
converse with my own heart, and sit in my dear closet,
with my pen and my book, are the greatest delights I
"can enjoy. I do not know that I could wish for a large
diffusion of all and exactly this feeling ; if universally
indulged, it might cast a shade of moroseness over our
fireside enjoyments. Being natural to me, however, I
cannot avoid it ; and, really, it makes me very happy."

At sixteen years of age she began to keep a diary,
or, rather, prescribe rules for her conduct, and note her
experience, by way of meditation and reflection ; for, it
does not appear, that she began to keep a regular diary
till she had nearly completed her seventeenth year. Her
diary and reflections were designed to be a secret corres-
pondence with her own heart, and certainly were never
written with any expectation that they would meet the
eye of man. Extracts from these portraitures of her
inmost soul, will more justly display her character than
anything which could be said by any other person.

Among this interesting collection of papers, we find
the following prayer. It is powerfully descriptive of the
feelings and aspirations of her heart at a very early age,
for it is dated at the commencement of the new
year, 18 — , when she had just completed her thirteenth
year : —

^' 0 thou great and adorable Jehovah ! fountain of
love! listen to the prayer of a sinful, rebellious child;
2

14 LEILAADA,

hide not thyself from my supplications. May thy Spirit
illuminate my dark, benighted soul ; may it dispel the
gloom which now casts down my spirit, and guide my
petition aright.

"I adore thee for the countless blessings which to
the present time, thou hast bestowed upon me ; and for
thy care, which has preserved my existence amid these
numberless mercies. But when I look into my heart,
and see its depravity ; when I think on the ungrateful
return I have made thy love, I am abased — I am pros-
trate in the dust.

^' Thou, who permittest me to address thee as my
God, and my Creator, thou seest my state ; thou know-
est me altogether. 0 that I could express half that I
feel of love to thee, who hast done so much for me. O
Grod, I am proud, self-willed, worldly-minded, and I
cannot be happy j but thou hast inspired ardent desires
for thyself; answer me according to thy word — thy
word which is truth itself — eternal as thy duration —
O that on it my soul may repose. 0 that thy love
may refresh my spirit, and cause my eyes to over-
flow with tears of joy, in the conviction that tJiou lovest
me. Then how poor and mean will be all earth-born
joys; then will my soul rejoice in its freedom, and exult
in its immortality.

<^The dissolving universe shall one day proclaim
that the hour of retribution is at hand ; and the great
arcana of nature, in which I love to trace thy finger,
shall melt before the piercing glance of thine avenging
eye. 0, that through thee I may be enabled to hail
the moment, as that of my complete happiness.

" On this commencement of another year, I enter

\

THEJEWISH CONVERT. 15

into a solemn covenant with thee, to dedicate myself
to thee. Show me what thou wouldst have me to be
and do, and I will pray earnestly for thy assistance,
that I may fulfil thy will. O, that thou wouldst
arise, and by thy glorious beams scatter my spiritual
darkness. Grrant me thy aid, that I may not swerve
from my resolution. Enlarge and bless my soul ; and let
me be happy from a constant walking in thy fear. Amen."

We have every reason to suppose that at this period
Leila's belief in her religion was unshaken ; yet from
this her earliest record of thoughts and imaginings,
written at the time she felt them, we may see that she
was now earnestly in pursuit of that in which she after-
wards found solid happiness. We can perceive an en-
thusiastic longing of the spirit, and a deeply wrought
effort of the soul, which when the veil fell from her
eyes, abundantly prepared her to press into the liberty
of the children of God.

Although the children of Israel profess to receive the
Old Testament Scriptures as divine, yet they greatly
neglect their study, and as a consequence are involved
in gross darkness. But while they have cast Moses
and the Prophets into the shade, they have introduced
an enormous rival to divine revelation, under the pre-
tence that it is a comment upon the Law of Moses.
This they call the Mishna, or oral law.

The Mishna is divided into six orders : — the first or-
der treats of the vegetable world ; the second of feasts ;
the third of women; the fourth of damages; the fifth
of holy things ; and \h.Q sixth of purifications.

The Mishna was published to the world in 1698, in
six folio volumes, by Sui-enhusiuS; of Amsterdam. The

/

16 LEILA ADA,

principal part of these volumes is occupied by the com-
ments of translators and rabbis.

We will give an account of the Mishna by Kabbi
Moses Ben Maimon. This Moses Ben Maimon was one
of their ablest doctors. He was physician to the Sultan
of Egypt, lived in the twelfth century, and was enthu-
siastically engrossed in the philosophy of Aristotle.
From the initials of his name the Jews call him E-am-
bam : he is the writer of their creed and liturgy ; and
they have a saying, that from Moses to Moses there is
no one like Moses. Of the Mishna he gives the follow-
ing account : — " All the precepts of the law were given
by Grod to Moses, our master, together with an inter-
pretation of what the authentic text signified. Moses,
going into his tent, first related to Aaron the text
and the interpretation ; he rising and going to the right
hand of Moses. Eleazar and Ithamar, the sons of
Aaron, came and heard the same that had been before
dictated to their father ; so that he heard it twice.
Then came the seventy elders, and at last the whole
people heard the same. They all committed to memory
the text and the interpretation, which Aaron had heard
many times, and hence arose the written law, and the
oral law — 613 precepts together with their interpreta-
tions : the precepts inscribed in the books — the inter-
pretations handed down by word of mouth.

^' Moses dying left these interpretations to Joshua,
and he again to the elders, and they to the prophets,
who handed them down from one to another without
any dissent, till the time of the men of the great syna-
gogue, who were Haggai, Zechariah, Malachi, Daniel,
Hananiah, Mishael, Azariah, Ezra the scribe, Nehe-

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 17

miali, Hacaliah, Mordecai, and Zerubbabel the son
of Shealtiel, with others to the number of one hun-
dred and twenty. But the last of the men of that
sacred company was the first of the wise men mentioned
in the Mishna, Simeon the Just, at that time high priest.
After whom it came in process of time to our Rabbi,
the holy, who was the phoenix of his age and the unique
glory of that time, a man in whom God had accumu-
lated such virtues that he merited to be called by his
contemporaries, our Rabbi, the holy, whose name was
Judah, so that it was said, ' From the days of Moses
to the Rabbi, we have never seen law and nobility
together, and from the time that he died, humility and
the fear of sin ceased •/ and so rich was he that it used
to be said, ' The groom of the stables of Rabbi was
richer than Sapor king of the Persians/ He, tracing
his doctorial genealogy up to Moses, composed the
Mishna, partly from the traditions from the lips of
Moses, partly from consequences elicited by argument
in which there is unanimous consent, partly from con-
clusions in which there is a difference arising from two
modes of interpretation (for they have thirteen modes
of interpreting) ; so that sometimes our Rabbi says,
' Such a one affirms this, such another says that.' "

There being such various modes of interpretation has
given rise to numberless dissensions among the Jews.
From Simeon the Just to the year 150 of the Christian
era, Judah mentions ninety-one wise men, as handing
down to him their decisions.

The Mishna is said to be an oral law, received from
the lips of God, and intended as an . exponent of hir
written law. But we should transgress the purity
2'^

18 LEILAADA,

whicli religion demands, were we to quote some of its
puerile and absurd follies. If those who penned it set
about their work with an intention to shock common
sense, and load the Jewish religion with contempt, they
could scarcely have acquitted themselves better. And
let no one suppose that our strictures are unkind : any
one at all acquainted with the Mishna, will at once per-
ceive them to be within the bounds of that' charity and
pity, which we owe to those who err. Indeed, it were
but too easy to quote passages which would justify our
severest censures.

But withal, the Mishna is surrounded with a degree
of obscurity and hardness, owing to its orientalisms,
and a considerable pervasion of a sort of Hebraeo-G-re-
cism in its structure. This obscurity has given rise to
another commentary, called the Gremara, or completion.
One Gemara, written in Palestine, forms with the
Mishna, the Jerusalem Talmud, and another, written
at Babylon, composes the Babylonish Talmud. Thus
the Mishna, which the Jews declare to be God's own
interpretation of his law, requires interpretation from
man, and the whole together forms a mighty work of
twelve folio volumes. These are the volumes which
contain the whole of the Jewish divinity ; for, dishon-
ouring to God, they have almost completely withdrawn
the Jews from the study of Moses and the Prophets.

In common with the rest of her nation, the Talmud
formed the basis of Leila's religious education. Of the
Old Testament she knew comparatively little. It is far
from certain, indeed, that she knew a great deal of the
Talmud. For this there were causes : — first, she did
not like its study ; she telb us in her Reflections, that

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 19

while believing in its divinity, as she was instructed, she
experienced a smothered dislike to many of its forms,
observances, and precepts. *a felt it,'' she says,
" smouldering at the bottom of my heart long before I
had moral courage to permit a single thought upon it.
I shuddered at my suspicions as blasphemous, yet 1
could not conquer them. But as the Spirit of God
opened my eyes, I felt no difficulty in fully avowing my
severest thoughts upon the inane, absurd, debasing stu-
dies of the Talmud. I felt no compunction while I
openly declared to my own heart that it was an impure,
stupid fabrication, composed by fallen and sinful man."
What a volume is contained in these few thrilling sen-
tences ! Would the sons of Jacob speak out, how many
would tell us the same story ? Impossible it is but that
among them there are thousands who, while they dare
not repudiate the Talmud, are conscious of a feeling of
offence at its impurities, and absurdities. Secondly,
her father, although strictly a Jew in belief and profes-
sion, gave himself little trouble about their require-
ments and observances, and, therefore, was very far
from pressing them upon his daughter.

But a mind constituted like that of Leila, eagerly
thirsting after truth, could not be always content without
strictly examining the Old Testament Scriptures ; those
Scriptures which all her nation believe in, as the pure
word of God. Her first intentions to study them (for
certainly she had previously read them, especially the
Psalms) are expressed among the earliest entries in her
diary, and bear date when she was about seventeen years
old. We extract the passage : ^' I have read the Tal-
mud, and have dipped into the learning of the East, and

20 LEILA ADA,

while my heart has been intent in the prosecution of
these studies^ I have comparatively neglected the blessed
word of God — the majestic Scriptures. The result of
my reading is a strong opinion that the advent of the
Messiah is probably near ; yet, while I have been con-
sulting the writings of men, I have greatly neglected the
prophecies which relate to him. Why then do I pro-
fess to my heart that I have formed an opinion, when I
have neglected the great test, the predictions of the
Scriptures ? 0 Lord, forgive my thus dishonouring
thee. As I now determine that in thy strength I will
give myself to the earnest, simple, devout reading and
study of thy holy word, I ask of thee, I beseech of
thee, illuminate my soul, and guide my judgment aright.

^' 0 Lord, my G-od, thou knowest my heart, and thou
knowest how ardently I pant to be thine accepted ser-
vant ; yet, alas I I am in bondage ; yet alas ! I am not
happy. Oh, that I could pour out my eyes in tears for
my sins ! It is they, which like a mountain, cast down
and oppress my spirit. I find no comfort but in aspira-
tions after thee ; and thou knowest I am sincere — at
least I believe I am sincere ; if not I beseech thee rec-
tify my heart. 0 that I knew how I might please thee !
for then should I be at rest. Forgive me for the time
that is passed : guide me, and teach me, and assist me
in the future. 0 that thou wouldst visit me according
to the word which thou hast declared unto my fathers !
Amen."

Leila was fully aware of the necessity of acting on a
digested plan, that all her time might be used to
some purposes of good. A considerable portion of it
was devoted to reading, and other endeavours for the

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 21

improvement of her mind ; and this was to her a source
of pleasure which she highly valued — far more so, indeed,
than the empty frivolous pursuits of many of her own
age and sex. That she might have every help to strictly
fill each moment, she drew up an arrangement in writing.
In this she apportioned to every hour its occupation, and
to it she endeavoured to rigidly adhere. '^ I strive," she
says, in her diary, '^ to occupy every moment well; I do
this, not simply because it is my interest, but also, and
I hope and believe chiefly, because it is my duty.''

At about the same time she also formed a series of
resolutions for the regulations of her conduct ; and the
mind which could make and act upon them, must have
had in it all the elements of greatness and efficiency ; it
must have possessed a character deservedly esteemed and
revered. They are worthy the imitation of every one,
especially the young, and we cannot forbear copying
them here : —

" For the regulation of my life, and balancing my
conduct, I resolve :

" 1. That the salvation of my soul shall be my first
and great concern.

^' 2. That I will never be ashamed of my religion, but
will always avow it when and where it shall seem proper
so to do.

*'3. That I will always carefully speak the truth;
never indulge in the very least equivocation, but always
.be both verbally and substantially correct ) and to this
end I will carefully watch the meaning of all I utter.

" 4. That I will always be ready to confess a fault,
or ask forgiveness for it, no matter what the character
or position of the person against whom I have offended.

2® LEILA ADA,

" 5. That I will do nothing to another which I should
object to their doing to me. That I will never do any-
thing which if I saw it committed by another would
cause him or her to fall in my esteem.

^' 6. That as far as in me lies, I will never do nor he
anything upon which I cannot expectingly and confi-
dingly ask the blessing of God.

'^ 7. That when I have fixed a principle in my mind
I will never abandon it, whatever occurs, unless I am
convinced that it is a wrong one, or would involve me in
bad consequences.

" 8. That in fulfilling a clear duty, or in the pursuit
of a good and proper object, I will never allow myself to
be overcome by any trials or difficulties whatever.

"9. That I will daily study the Scriptures.

'^10. That I will encourage meditations upon death
and eternity.

"11. That I will live to God, with all my might while
I do live. That I will strive never to engage in anything
which I should shun, if assured I was living the last
hour of my life.

'^12. That I will decide nothing which is brought
before my judgment, until I have thoroughly examined
it on every side. That what I have once decided, shaU
be fixed and irrevocable. That I will take nothing for
granted, but that I will endeavour to discover what is
truth in reference to the smallest principles.

" 13. That upon all occasions I will discountenance
improper levity and conversation, in whatever company
I may be.

" 14. That I will carefully guard my temper, and
never show the least symptom of impatient emotion;

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 23

not even by an altered tone of voice, or expression of
countenance. That I will do this even if from physical
causes I feel fretful and uneasy : no one else should
suffer on this account.

"15. That I will never speak sharply or crossly to
our servants; on the contrary, I will be gentle and
affectionate, which will gain all my desires the sooner.

" 16. That my conversation shall be always in love,
and as far as possible adapted to the tone of feeling in
those with whom I converse. That I will never talk
upon trifles, nor self, nor the failings or defects of others;
nor in it will I ever seek to display superiority of attain-
ment over the company I may be among ; but I will
always use it in advancing the happiness of my social
and domestic circle.

^' 17. That I will never waste a moment.

" 18. That I will be temperate in eating and drink-
ing.

" 19. That I will strictly guard against pride in
dress, and every other of its manifestations; against
vanity, self-conceit, and indulging supposed superiority
of mind.

"20. That I will live only to serve God and for the
good of others. Never seek my own pleasure or satis-
faction at the expense of that of any one else ; but as
far as possible I will forget that there is a self to please.

"21. That I will love my dear father with all my
might, and do everything I can to promote his temporal
and spiritual happiness. ''

24 LEILAADA,

CHAPTER 11.

LEILA ACCOJIPANIES HER FATHER TO THE HOLY LAND — THEIR JOUR-
NEY— COLOGNE — THE RHINE — THE JURAS — GENEVA— CHILLON

LAUSANNE — GIBBON.

Leila was now in the eighteentli year of her age.
Her mother was dead. Her father, lonely except in
the company of the child of his love, resolved to visit
with her the Holy Land and the city of his fathers.
This was a season of joyous excitement to Leila.
Happiness in ten thousand dreamy forms flitted before
her mental vision, and filled her, even in anticipation,
with indescribable pleasure. In a letter written just
before leaving England, after much playful description,
she continues: '^I love the East; it has always been
the sweetest spot in my imagination. All my anticipa-
tions are in joyous exercise. I shall be fired by the
loneliness of the ocean, the stirring excitement of new
scenes, the romantic and historical associations con-
nected with the places through which I shall pass, their
variety of manners, customs, and costumes, the shores
and hoary mountains which border upon the sea, the
sublime solitariness of the wildly beautiful isles of the
blue ^gean, and a host of adventures and pleasurable
situations. At every step I shall be furnished with
abundant materials for thought and reflection." And
to a large extent she was not disappointed, as is proved
by some of her beautiful sketches, in poetry and prose.

But that the enjoyment which she proposed to her-

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 25

self was tinged by a deep religious feeling, and that

with it was connected a deep concern for her religious

interests, is evinced by the remarks made in her diary.

Here, too, we notice the commencement of a glorious

era in the life of Leila; the circumstance which, under

the blessing of the Holy Spirit, led to her embracing

the Christian faith ', and how delightful it is to trace

the prevailing character of her mind in these reflections ;

hastily as they sometimes appear to be written. But

we will go on to our extract : —

" For a while, then, I am about to leave thee, my

much-loved C . The green sward on which I have

so often sported — the groves which have so often rung

with my wild and girlish joy — the sweet river, whose

constant changes, and whose lulling murmurs, give a

sweet variety and music to the scene ; and ye, my lovely

flowers, whose culture has so often engaged my time

and attention, and led me to look

*To Him whose sun exalts,
Whose breath perfumes you, and whose pencil paints ;

yes, I must leave you all. Shall I ever again behold
you ? A stray tear flows down my cheek— welcome
drop ! I would on no account forego thy pleasure
The passions, when acted upon in a manner both puro
and innocent, are sources of deep delight.

'' Thou Infinite Eternal ! go with me. I visit that
land which has in a special manner been visited with
exhibitions of thy miraculous power — the land in which
my fathers worshipped. ' Oh ! that the salvation of
Israel were come out of Zion. When Grod bringeth
back the captivity of his people; Jacob shall rejoice,
and Israel shall be glad.'
3

26 LEILAADA,

'< I am sensible of my sinfulness ; I am unworthy of
the slightest mark of favour from thy hand; but cast
me not utterly from thy presence. Save me, 0 Grod, by
thy name ; take not thy Holy Spirit from me. Thou
desirest no other sacrifice than that of a broken spirit
and a contrite heart — this I offer to thee. Dispel thou
now the cloud which afflicts my soul. Enable me to
rejoice in thy salvation, and evermore glorify thee in my
body and spirit, in my life and conversation.

"I desire to record the blessed effect which the read-
ing of the Scriptures has had upon my mind. I desire
to read them more attentively, that in future this good
may be increased. I have also determined to read the
book which the Christians call the New > Testament.
They profess that prophecies in the Old Testament are
clearly fulfilled in the New. I intend to see what
ground they take. It is true I have heard much, and
read much, of the awful character of that book, and am
told that a fearful curse rests upon the reading of it. 1
cannot think this to be true, where it is intended to
increase a knowledge of the difference between the Jew
and the Christian. Besides, shall I not be a better Jew
for reading it ? Will it not assist to imbue my mind
with the proofs of the dreadful mistake which the
Christians commit ? I cannot doubt that I am right.
Suppose I were conversing with a Christian, how could
I give the lie to a book I have never read ? Would he
not turn upon me and inquire, ' Where is your princi-
ple V The Christians read and study the Old Testa-
ment ; and how should I be prepared to prove to them
that the New Testament is untrue, if I am unacquainted
with the nature of the proofs in favour of Christianity

THE JEWISH CONVERT 27

wliich it contains ? Curiosity, a sense of duty, and a
desire to have a well-instructed, well-balanced mind, all
impel me forward. Indeed, too, I look at the Chistians,
and I see no manifestations that a curse rests upon
them — shall I, dare I say, that, compared with our own
afflicted nation, they are most happy? It is true; then
I will repeat it.

^' With sentiments of gratitude to Grod, T at present
close my Cornish journal. May my future one, in ad-
dition to the catalogue of mercies, of divine favours, re-
cord also more heartfelt thankfulness for their bestow-
ment, and more ardent longings for an entire devotion
of myself to the service of my G-od and King. Amen."

It was arranged that their pilgrimage to Asia, should
be by way of Switzerland, Italy, Greece, and Turkey.
In a journal entiled ^' Notes of a Tour to the Holy
Land," Leila has given us a most interesting series of
remarks upon the places in their course. From this we
shall make large quotations ; more especially as her re-
flections upon her spiritual state are in many cases in-
separably mixed with the accounts of the emotions ex-
cited by the solemn beauties of nature, as presented to
her view.

On the 9th of April, 18 — , Leila, in company with
her father, left London for Ostend. In the following
pathetic lines, she has beautifully expressed the feelings
produced in her mind, as she beheld the shores of her
native country gradually vanish in the distance : —

" One look, one parting look, and now thy shores,
Thy happy shores, are vanished, Albion ;
Adieu! Adieu!

28 LEILAADA,

What can my grief be ?
Have I not hope, and joy, and happiness ?
Is not the world before me, and my home ?
Have I not with me all I have to love ?
What can my grief be ? Why am I so sad ?
Why measures thus mine eye each saucy wave,
Which coursing drives me onward ?

Why I
There is a spot engirt by those white rocks.
Most sacred of the earth ; the Mecca's fane
To which my holiest memory ever kneels —
My mother's grave ! a fragrant shrine. From thence
I distance count, henceforward and for aye."

ArriviDg at Ostend the pilgrims pursued their way to
Cologne. Of this city, Leila briefly says, " And this is
the Colonia Agrippina of the Romans, and the metropolis
of Rhenish Prussia. It is certainly very pretty, indeed
beautiful, if you will take the trouble to cross and view
it from the right bank of the Rhine. Thence the effect
is very fine — the river, smooth as a polished mirror, re-
flecting in its bosom the various craft upon its sur-
face— the city bathing its deep shadow in the cooling
waters — and the prominence of those beautiful edifices,
St. Martin, St. Gereon, Baiensthurm, and Der Dom.
I have found much to interest me."

Thence they steamed up the Rhine ; and in a few
slight, but powerful touches, Leila has given her testi-
mony to the living freshness, and unchanging beauty,
of the vine-clad banks of that glorious river. ^'In
looking," she says, ^' upon the smiling fields and rich
orchards and luxuriant vineyards, with the pretty towns
and villages buried amongst them — upon the ancient
and hoary castles tottering with age, upon the towering
crags which support their foundations; I felt I was living

THE JEWISH CONVERT, 29

some of the most delicious moments of my life : and I
wept with a feeling of unutterable delight. Oh ! how
good is G-od, to provide so much innocent pleasure for
the gratification of the senses ! Oh ! that men would
praise him for his goodness ! I trust that I can trace
a feeling of increased thankfulness and gratitude for the
abundant blessings and mercies he has bestowed upon
me. May he help and save me^ and make me all that
is pleasing in his sight: in him^ the strong, the
Almighty, do I put my trust : I will not be afraid.
Thy vows are upon me, 0 God ; then come thou to my
present salvation.^^

Amid scenes of living loveliness, which more and
more imbued her mind with the purifying and exalting
influences of nature, she approached the Alps. This
stupendous range of mountains, proudly rearing their
snowy summits to the skies, seemed to her imagination,
as something spiritual, which she had seen in her
dreams : as something too ethereal to belong to reality.

Proceeding onward they came to the heights of the
Jura. ^'Reie," says Leila, "the scene which burst
upon our view, far exceeds my powers of description.
It was intensely grand and beautiful. The lovely lake
of Geneva, lying in a hollow, begirt by the sublimely
majestic Alps, which in their turn arouse feelings of
wonder and delight; and then the other objects, sweet,
chaste, and impressive, which compose the landscape,
form an ensemble of overpowering magnificence. I was
at once reminded of Rousseau's description of a Swiss
exile beholding again his native country. I could enter
into the passionate ecstacy. As far as a stranger could
feel it, it was my own :—

80 LEILAADAj

a (

The moment in wliicli, from the heights of the
Jura, I discovered the lake of Geneva, was one of
ecstacy and ravishment. The view of my country, that
country so dear to me, where my heart had overflowed
with torrents of delight; the Alpine air so salutary and so
pure ; the soft air of my native soil, sweeter than all the
perfumes of the East; this rich and fertile land, this un-
ique landscape ! the most beautiful with which the human
eye was ever struck ! delightful abode, to which I had
never found an equal in the world ! the aspect of a free
and happy people, the sweetness of the season, the
serenity of the climate — a thousand delightful recollec-
tions, which awakened all the feelings I had tasted
there ; all this threw me into such transports as I cannot
describe, and seemed to give back to me at once the en-
joyment of my whole existence !' "

Traversing Switzerland, in the direction of Greneva,
they stayed a moment at Avenche, thus noticed by
Leila : '^ This morning we reached Avenche, the ancient
Aventicum. We went to see the column erected to the
young princess, Julia xilpinula. How exquisitely touch-
ing are the recollections of history ! I looked upon its
venerable aspect, seemingly worn rather by grief than
time. I thought upon her purity and filial devotion,
and I felt her immortality."

They had now reached the beautiful, the romantic
lake of Geneva. Every one who has seen the grandeur
of this lake and the surrounding scenery — the sublime
majesty of the distant Juras — the dreamy Alps, hover-
ing i'n the sky, unsubstantial as a vision, spiritual,
heavenly in beauty — the luxuriant shores of the Pays
de Vaud, its hill-sides covered with the richest vine-

THE JE WI SH CO N VERT. 31

yards, among wliicli numerous towns and villages smile
in all the attractions and loveliness of Paradise — the
afar off mouths of the blue and rapidly gliding Rhone — '
the rich shores of the Chablais™ every one who has seen
the unequalled beauty and magnificence of this pan-
orama, has felt its syren-like influence, in withdrawing
the imagination from contemplating the harshness, and
roughness, and impurity of the world, and in exalting
communion with the pure spirit of nature, to fill the
heart with the genius of a higher and holier existence.
Moving amid these ennobling scenes, Leila imbibed a
still deeper love for solitude : and soothed by their ex-
quisite softness, or exalted by their ethereal majesty,
she spent many hours in their contemplation. Her study
and her closet, she made of the mountain torrent, the
placid lake, the crystal stream, or the embowering copse.
And elevated and refined by their sublimity and sweet-
ness, "we hear her saying, " I have almost forgotten the
world, and were not such feelings, perhaps, selfish, I
could wish never to return to it, but live and die among
contemplations upon the beauties and harmonies of
nature. I love to be alone. The deep emotions which
throb in my bosom, while I gaze upon the beautiful
earth and sky, I could not express — indeed, were they
exnressible, their value must be diminished. Thank-
ful I am that my heart is so deeply susceptible of im-
pressions of loveliness and sublimity."

Embarking at Greneva, our travellers began their voy-
age along the interesting shores of this beautiful ex-
panse of water. Leaving Hermance, Nerni, and Evian
behind, they arrived at Meillerie; to which Rousseau

32 LEILA^ADA,

has contributed interest^ by bis ^^ Nouvelle Helojse."
With this village, and its situation, Leila was delighted :
in reference to it she says, ^' After dinner we ascended
the heights [of Meillerie]. It occupied us upwards of
an hour. The caverns echoed and re-echoed with the
wild screams of the terrible eagle of the Alps. A
torrent, formed of the melting snows, rolled its turgid
Tfaters at a short distance from us. Below us, and on
the left of the torrent, grew a large wood of oaks.
Behind us, was that part of the Alps called the Glaciers ;
a chain of rocky precipices separated it from the part of
the heights on which we stood. On our right hand,
were thick forests of black pines : and beneath us, lay
the smiling lake, fawning upon the beach, and separa-
ting us from the luxurious shores of the Pays de Yaud,
beyond which towered the magnificent Juras. All was
silent grandeur and exquisite loveliness."

Thence they passed to the singularly beautiful village
of St. Gingoux, respecting which Leila says, *^Iwas
enraptured with Meillerie; but, in comparison, this
village is of surpassing beauty.''

Montalegre, Hermance, Nerni, Lausanne, Meillerie
and its heights, the castle of Chillon, Clarens, the range
of Alps above Boveret and St. Gingoux, the mountains
of Savoy and the Yalais, the blue lake, all these formed
a panorama of images of ideal loveliness, which found
their way to the inmost soul of Leila. In her own lan-
guage, '* This would seem the abode of idealism; I can
scarce believe that what I see is real. It impresses my
mind as a familiar scene which was once dear to my
imagination; and^ lost in the spirituality of a vision^ is

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 66

now brought before me, in its sublime magnificence a
creation too powerfully bright for reality/'

Crossing the stream of the Rhone, at the eastern
extremity of the lake, they continued their voyage, and
soon came up to the Chateau de Chillon. Around this
castle an undying interest is thrown by the remarkable
Bonnivard, it being the place of his imprisonment for
several years. A visit to it is thus described by Leila :
''The castle of Chillon is situated between Clarens and
Yilleneuve. Opposite it are the heights of Meillerie
and the Alps. In situation and everything else it is
striking and romantic. An irregular mass of towers
and pointed roofs, it rises from out of the waves near the
eastern extremity of the lake. The water, which washes
its walls, having been sounded, is found to be eight hun-
dred feet deep, French measure. Immense mountains
enclose and overhang it, and greatly contribute to im-
press the beholder with awe, while he recollects the
scenes of which its walls have been the theatre. The
access to it is by means of a draw-bridge. Its white
walls make it a very conspicuous object, and being large
it may be seen along the lake for a great distance.
Descending below the level of the lake, you come to a
range of prisons ', an involuntary shudder crept over me
as I entered these dark, chilly abodes of cruelty. There
is one which is pointed out as the principal place of con-
finement for the early Reformers; how I felt my heart
dilate with thankfulness to God^ that those days have
passed away from the earth. In later years it was used
as a place of confinement for prisoners of state. It is
supported upon pillars, to which rings for the captives

34 LEILAADA,

are attaclied ; their names are engraved upon the stones.
A narrow cell is adjacent to this dungeon, and still
beyond this is another one, very dark and lofty, and
supported upon arches. Across one of these arches is a
black and mouldering beam, upon which the condemned
prisoners were formerly executed. I felt a cold thrill
of terror as I looked upon it. We were told, also, that
a secret spring communicated with the lake, by means
of which the whole of the dungeons could be filled with
water, and so rapidly that all possibility of the captives
escaping would be certainly prevented. Bonnivard has
left the traces of his footsteps in the pavement of the
prison in which he was confined. I was very, very glad,
to quit these dungeons of cruelty and sufiering ; and I
felt an indescribable sense of liberty, when again I
inhaled the free and salutary air of the Alps."

Leaving Chillon, they landed at Yevay. ^' Vevay,"
she says, *^is a pretty town. Sweet and lovely in sim-
plicity, it is the kind of abode which is often present in
niy imagination. The market-place is a spacious square,
beautifully interspersed with trees. From thence you
have a fine view of the blue lake, the mountains of the
Valais and Savoy, and the picturesque valley of the
Rhone."

Groing onward, they visited Ouchy, and thence pro-
ceeded to Lausanne, about a mile distant. Their pur-
pose was to see the house and garden of Gibbon. We
again quote from Leila's journal: ^^ After dinner we
walked to Lausanne, and proceeded at once to our great
object of interest, the residence of Gibbon. We were
shown the avenue of old acacias on his favorite terrace,

THEJE WIS II CONVERT. 35

SO often noticed in his memoirs, and where he took his
final leave of the great work which had occupied so large
a portion of his life. I gathered a few acacia leaves to
preserve in remembrance of him.'^

From Ouchy, a pleasant sail brought the travellers
back to Geneva, beautifully situated at the outlet of the
Rhone from the lake. Thus closed what had proved to
each a most delightful voyage.

36 LEILA ADA,

CHAPTER III.

THE JOITRNET CONTINUED — BERNESE OBERLAND — SIMMENTHAL —
STAUBBACH — WENGERN ALP — THE SIMPLON.

The pleasure which Leila had experienced during
her Swiss tour, determined her father to prolong it by
another to the Bernese Oberland — a region certainly not
less interesting than any they had yet visited. Once
more, therefore, they entered their boat, and retracing
the lovely borders of the lake, they again visited Ouchy
and Lausanne. Still cruising by the shore, they landed
at Yevay. Leaving Yevay, they proceeded on to Cla-
rens. Arriving there, they began a passage up the
beautiful ascent of the range of mountains which sepa-
rate the basin of the Leman Lake from the valleys of the
Bernese Oberland.

After repeated slips down the precipitous declivities,
and meeting with all the variety of occurrences incident
to a mountain passage, our travellers surmounted the
crest. Here they lingered awhile to gaze upon the mag-
nificent prospect before them. The lofty Juras and the
majestic Alps, encircled the blue expanse of the lake.
In an opposite and easterly direction, might be dimly
seen the lakes of Morat and Neufchatel, and still neare**
the Canton of .Friburg and its mountains.

Leaving these peaceful and ennobling scenes, our
travellers, as Leila expresses herself, " with a mind full
of the beauties of nature/^ slowly prepared to descend

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 37

into the pastoral district of the valley of the Simmen-
thal. The Simmenthal is considered the longest and
most beautiful of this range of the Alps. Leila's mind
was filled with images of the peace and quietude of the
pastoral life in these vales. The following is an extract
from her description : '^ All around me is poetic beyond
my powers to describe — poetic even to the most simple
features of the peasant's life. The rustic shepherd
of the Alps, seated upon a rugged rock^ his crook beside
him, his pipe, his bottle of simple whey, and the wallet
containing his hard cheese and coarse bread, perhaps,
suspended by a girdle, the bleating of the mountain
goats, the bells hung to the necks of the cows, the
tinklings of which become faittter and more faint as
they fearlessly climb the most precipitous rocks — all
combine to fill me with inexpressible pleasure. Never
before did I equal the enjoyment experienced in mixing
with this unsophisticated pastoral life.'' So it would
seem, for we find her conversing with the shepherds,
playing with their goats, visiting their chalets, eating
at their board, drinking their milk and whey, frolicking
with their children, and nursing their infants.

Emerging from the lovely valley of the Simmenthal,
the charming lake of Thun burst upon their view,
forming with the surrounding prospect a scene of chaste
and unrivalled beauty. On arriving at Thun they found
a village fete was just commencing. There were booths
gracefully hung with festoons of variegated lamps,
buried amid bouquets, and interwoven with branches
of trees. These booths exposed refreshments and other
articles for sale. Our travellers were enraptured with
the beautiful, simple, and sweetly wild melody of the

38 LEILA ADA^

native airs sung by the peasant girls of Thun and the
neighbouring villages. In the evening the streets were
illuminated. There was a profusion of rustic music and
dancing, and the streets were not quieted till long after
midnight. It was conducted, however, with pastoral
simplicity, and altogether devoid of any approach to
profanity or debauchery.

At Thun they embarked upon the lake, and were not
long ere they reached Interlachen. In their way into
the remarkable valley of Lauterbrunnen, they had to
pass through the impressive gorge of the Liitschinnen,
where they met with scenes of indescribably sublime
and awful grandeur. In her journal, Leila says: '^I
write while sitting uj^'on a rock in the gorge of the
Liitschinnen. I am overwhelmed in contemplation of
the magnificent workings of divine power which lie
around me and above me. All is grand, full of majesty,
and omnipotence, and glory. As I sit, I obtain a
glimpse of the distant Jungfrau. The bright silver of its
glaciers, resting upon the soft azure of the sky, greatly
heightens the sublimity of the scene. Large masses
of fallen rocks lie on either hand, among which the
mountain streams bound with a wild and impetuous
majesty. Above me are terrible overhanging precipices,
and huge rocks suspended in mid air. Spanning the
boiling torrents at intervals, and at a height which
makes me giddy even to look at, are the frail and peri-
lous planks which form the bridges of the Alps. One
unused to see such paths would imagine that any
attempt to cross them at such a dizzy elevation, and
over the rushing and roaring cataracts, must involve
certain and fearful destruction. But Alpine maidens

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 39

trip across the awful abyss without manifesting any
trepidation. We have just passed a rock called the
Bruderstein, It is in the most savage part of the gorge,
and bears an inscriptionj recording that there one brother
committed murder upon another. I shall be glad to
leave this dismal pass, where, in my apprehension, every
thing bears the marks of earthquakes and convulsions.^'

Leaving this " dismal pass,'' they entered the wildly
magnificent valley of Lauterbrunnen. The change from
the savage grandeur of the Liitschinnen, to the beauty
and deliciousness of Lauterbrunnen, produces, from the
powerful contrast, the most lively emotions of pleasure
and delight. The mind is filled with a soul-felt love for
nature, of a higher and more comprehensive order than
the mere sympathy of individual passion, so blended
with the entire being, that our personality is destroyed,
and, though knowing ourselves to be but part, we mingle
in the glory and beauty of the whole.

Our travellers lingered awhile to contemplate the
lovely Staubbach. " Staubbach," says Leila, " is like
nothing which my richest imagination had depictured or
conceived. Its effect is beautiful — indescribable, as it falls
from an immense height (about nine hundred feet), like
a volume of finely powdered snow, gradually widening
in the most graceful curves as it descends. Upon it sits
an iris of great beauty, so near that you may walk into
it ; I myself did so. Though so very high, its descent
is soft and peaceful.

" I find these scenes of inestimable value in stirring
me up to a deeper acquaintance with the word of God,
and also in enlarging my views and conceptions of his
majesty and greatness, and love and power. To gaze

40 LEILAADA,

upon the bright stars, as one by one tliey peep from
behind the distant peaks, or are seen through the vistas
of the rocky pass ; to watch the fading glories of the
setting sun, and mark their brilliant hues as reflected in
the clear, deep bosom of the soft lake ; how beautiful !
how exalting ! how impressive !

'^ I trust that this effect may not be lost upon me ;
but that, as where much is given, much is also required, I
shall be found faithful to my opportunities and privi-
leges. For this I pray earnestly. 0 Grod, go not far
from me, but arise and deliver me for thy name's sake.
Thou knowest — thou art my witness — how much I desire
that my heart may be rightly guided, and entirely/ sub-
dued to thy service. ^As the hart panteth after the
brooks of water/ even thus doth my soul pant for the
enjoyment of my Grod.

*^ At such seasons as the present, when indisposition
and languor affect my body, how practically I feel that
no mere earthly good can make me happy. Nothing
but the constant presence of him who fills the earth
and heaven, can content my soul. For this my prayers
shall be more earnest and persevering than ever ) and
though he seems to tarry, I will endeavour to wait
patiently for his coming.

'■'• What can I do ? All the curses of God's broken
law seem impending over me \ my soul is earthly ) the
heavens reveal my iniquity ! And Grod is a ^ just God.'
But he is also inexhaustible in mercy. He is a being
all love. 0 that I and my sins may be swallowed up in
its pure unsearchable sea. 0 thou Eternal ! I appeal
to thee if I do not love thee with my whole heart

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 41

Thou koowest that with all ray soul I desire to serve
thee.

'' I can scarcely write for weeping : often I spend the
night-watches restless, and watering my couch with my
tears. I am in a strait of bitter darkness — darkness which
may he felt. I know not the way of salvation. In the
Talmud I have no faith — I can have no faith. The more I
read the lovely Scripture, the more clearly do I perceive
that that book is altogether a fahrication of man. I can
believe nothing else ; nay, more, I feel that for worlds I
could not insult God by imputing it to him, or supposing
that he had anything to do with its being written.
And the Mosaic law I cannot fulfil ; it is impossible to
me and all our nation. Lord, help me and save me !
0 that thou wouldst take compassion on my woeful
state, and teach me what to do.

^^ My condition so oppressess my spirits, that to ele-
vate them I often write, and endeavour to make myself
believe, that Grod will enable me to rejoice in his salva-
tion, although I cannot tell why, nor how, for if I can
understand the Scripture, there are clearly conditions
which must be fulfilled. I repent, heartily repent;
my heart is indeed broken on account of sin ."

She has left this painful entry unfinished. Every
reader will sympathize with such a state, and will be
able to image it for himself Comment upon it is need-
less ; it could neither add to, nor diminish from the im-
pressions created by it.

They now began to make the passage from the valley

of Lauterbrunnen to the valley of C4rindelwald, over the

Wengern Alp. This is one of the most magnificent

and beautiful scenes, in this land of magnificence and

4*

42 LEILAADA,

beauty. Their ascent commenced amongst pasturagei?,
and goats, and shepherds, and chalets; while as they
wound higher and higher up the slopes the distant
mountains gradually unfolded themselves to view, form-
ing a scene of surpassing majesty and magnificence.
At length, a scene of overpowering sublimity burst
upon them — they were opposite the Jungfrau, and sepa-
rated from it by a tremendous and impenetrable abyss.
It was here that they had their grandest view of those
striking phenomena of the Alpine regions — the mists
rising from the valleys. This abyss had the appearance
of an ocean of vapour, boiling and foaming with agi-
tation, and heaving and dashing against the terrific
precipices. The efiect is solemn, and perfectly sublime.
Looking across this cloudy sea, the Jungfrau elevates
its snowy crest, surmounted by a superb cupola of
bright clouds, and brilliantly ornamented with glaciers.
Not less beautiful are the Wetterhorn and Eigher. And
several thousands of feet below lay the valleys of Lau-
terbrunnen and Grindelwald.

With the bracing and exhilarating air of the moun-
tains, our pilgrims and their men appear to have had a
return of the fresh youthful spirit of gaiety, for, ^^ While
descending the Wengern Alp,'' says Leila, '^ we heartily
amused ourselves in pelting each other with snow-balls.
In the palmiest days of my girlhood I have realljf
never surpassed the noisy mirth which I gave way to
on this occasion."

Descending the Wengern Alp among precipices of
ice, here and there rent into deep ravines, through
which rushed the mountain torrents, they entered the
valley of the Grindelwald. The romantic magnificence

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 43

of this valley, full of the most superb scenes of the
Bernese Oberland, could not fail to intensely interest
them. The immense glaciers rent and rugged, and
looking like a sea locked by immense breast-works of
ice. which, while hoary with the storm, had been sud-
denly frozen amid the wildness of its tossing, the tre-
mendous defiles and precipices, the overhanging rocks,
the tottering crags, the impetuous dashing of the Alpine
torrents, all these formed a striking contrast to the
peaceful woodland, the green pasturages, the rich forests
of pines, interspersed with verdant plains^ and smiling
cottages, and crystal streams.

Passing the base of the steep Wetterhorn, they
entered upon the richly verdant pastures of the Scheid-
eck — motley with cows and sheep, and lovely paradisiac
cottages, smiling with pastoral innocence and beauty.
From hence they had an unequalled view of the great
glacier of Rosenlaui. Pausing at the beautiful fall
of the Ileichenbach, they leisurely contemplated the
loveliness of the scene ; then, proceeding onwards, they
shortly after quitted the Oberland, and returned to
Geneva by a route in which nothing calls for particular
notice.

They were now to leave Switzerland for Italy. Their
route was by the lovely lake of Geneva and the Valais,
by way of Sion, Brieg, &c., to the famous pass of the
Simplon. Of this magnificent effort of human inge-
nuity, Leila expresses herself in terms of mingled
wonder and delight: ''The passage of the Simplon is
most extraordinary in its wonders — here, sweet and
magnificent; there, solemn and majestic. HerC; we

44 LEILAADA,

proceed through beautiful forests of pine and larch;
there, throush the most desolate and sterile solitude.
Now, through scenes of loveliness and sublimity; anon,
between frightful and terrific rocks, abysms calculated to
strike awe into the most impassioned beholder. The
termination of the valley of the Simplon is a frightful
chasm between precipices, perhaps two thousand feet
high, evidently a rent formed by some terrible convul-
sioii. The Doveria, formed by the junction of the
Krumbach and Querna, foams and roars through this
abyss, and follows the course of the road, sometimes
dashing its boiling torrent beneath the feet of the trav-
eller ; at others, with impetuous rage, it rushes head-
long past him. So does the traveller proceed for a very
great distance, through scenes awfully wild and desolate,
and between rocks of frightful height, which, over-
hanging his head, threaten each instant to tumble, and
involve him in destruction. I am struck with awe
while I only think upon it. The gallery of- Gondo is
another remarkable feature in this extraordinary road ;
it is an excavation in the solid granite of nearly six
hundred feet in length. Immediately upon issuing
from this gallery we stood over the Fmssinone. This
cataract is seen falling from a very great altitude, and,
continuing its course to the depth of perhaps a hun-
dred feet below you, it precipitates itself into the
Boveria. It is impossible to give any adequate des-
cription of the emotions which this scene excited in my
mind. They were of the true sublime, with a mixture
of awe and surprise, that created a conflict I can never
cease to remember. It is, perhaps, the finest assem-

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 45

"biage of objects to excite admiration whicli I have met
with in the Alps.

'' When near the gallery of G-ondo, a terrible storm
of rain, hail, and thunder broke overhead. We took
the best shelter we could find — an inhospitable, drip-
ping grotto. The lightning was awfully vivid, and as it
rushed from peak to peak, and glided down the deep
abyss, the effect was magnificent — sublime. The thun-
der, reverberated in powerful echoes from the mountains,
was deafening. Rain fell in torrents, and large hail-
stones in abundance. It was a terrific tempest; but I
was perfectly calm and composed throughout. I knew
who held the storm, and I felt safe in the protecting
hand of Omnipotence.

" Leaving Gondo, and the solitary and gloomy pass
of the Julia, the character of the abyss changes, and,
gradually widening, puts on an appearance less sterile
and dreary. At length the defile opens j the aqueous,
chilly mists and vapours are dispersed, and a scene
of the greatest beauty is unfolded to the view. This is
the lovely, the smiling valley of Fontana. We are now
in Jtal?/. Here, in a succession which bewilders the
senses, rise orchards, vineyards, gardens, groves, tiny
parks, and snowy white villages, nestling amid them.
The balmy atmosphere is a perfume. The exhilarating
effect of this change is indescribable. I was almost
ashamed of my loud outbursts of pleasure; again and
again did I inhale with increased delight the odoriferous
air of the Italian plains.

" With the impetuous Doveria still rushing and roar-
ing by your side, you proceed a few miles further.

46 LEILAADA,

Here, at tlie village of Crevola, another, and more
extensive, and perhaps more delightful, valley comes
into view. This is the delightful Val d'Ossola. Our
drive from the pretty village of Crevola to Duomo
d'Ossola was a season of the deepest enjoyment; surely
it is one of the loveliest spots which the traveller can
visit."

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 47

CHAPTER lY.

THE JOURNEY CONTINUED — MILAN — VERONA — VENICE — PERRARA

BOLOGNA — THE APENNINES — FLORENCE — ROME — THE COLISEUM
NAPLES.

On arriving at the Lago Maggiore, the Borromean
Islands arrested the attention of our travellers. " They
are fine," writes Leila, ^' but they do not agree with my
notions of beauty. They are too artificial — too much
of the architectural ornee over them." Thence they
passed onward through Sesto Calende to Milan. Again
we extract from Leila's journal : " This city, the capital
of northern Italy, is, in some sense magnificent; not
very so, I am apt to think ; indeed, scarcely what I
anticipated. Its beautiful cathedral, of white marble,
is certainly no less than grand, noble, and majestic. I
felt an exquisite sense of admiration when I first saw it.
It seems almost too ethereal to be an earthly creation,
as something which could exist only in poetical imagi-
nation. It is the largest cathedral in Italy, St. Peters,
at Rome, excepted. The great object of interest in the
interior, is the subterranean chapel of San Carlo Borro-
meo. His remains are kept in a sarcophagus of crystal,
superbly adorned with silver gilt and other decorations.

^^The gateway, which Napoleon erected at the en-
trance to the city, is also a striking and impressive
structure.

<' We were particularly fascinated with a fine Gu-

48 LEILA ADA,

ercino in the Brera collection, ^ Abraham putting away
Hagar and Ishmael/ While standing before it, one
cannot feel that it is only a picture" — that we look
merely upon gross and earthly colours. Hagar's coun-
tenance is full of soul ; every point in every feature beams
with deeply-wrought emotion ; her intense distress, her
mighty agony, the mixture of pathos and entreaty, of
sternness and upbraiding, of pride and desolation. Oh !
it is a face which once seen must ever be remembered.
Miraculous power! wondrous art! to endow a piece of
canvass with life, and thought, and all the noblest emo-
tions of the soul ! to invest an inanimate board with
a power, an impassioned eloquence, beyond what tongue
could ever utter, signs convey, or language express V

After visiting the Ambrosian Library, our tourists
quitted Milan, and, continuing their route, arrived at
Lake G-arda. Leila thus notices it : '' It being a lovely
day, we had a delightful drive on the borders of the
lake, and along the promontory of Sirmione, to visit the
ruins of the Villa of Catullus. On reaching the villa,
I was altogether interested and pleased, until our guide
conducted us to a dirty room — or, more correctly, a
cellar, choked with filthy rubbish— and then sagely
assured us that we were looking upon the very place
which Catullus occupied while writing his Odes to
Lesbia. I was so poetically indignant that I did "not
ask him to adduce a single proof; but I afterwards
reflected that whatever belief I might choose to indulge,
there is no more proof that it is not, than that it is."

Proceeding by the ancient Via Emilia, they came to
Verona, the birth-place of Catullus, Pliny the elder,>
and Paulo Veronese. Of its majestic amphitheatre, Leila

THEJE WISH CONVERT. 49

thus speaks : " With the grandeur of the amphitheatre I
was much impressed — it is a surprising structure. It is
composed of large blocks of marble, and is considered
the most perfect remain of Roman architecture which
now exists. It is to be regretted that the greater por-
tion of the upper range of arches in the exterior wall is
destroyed; thereby the effect is greatly diminished.
Within, however, the preservation is surprising. To
the interior there are two principal entrances. The
arena is encircled by forty-five rows of seats. The form
of the amphitheatre is oval : in length it is 464 feet ;
in width, 367 feet/ French measure."

Going forward, we bring our travellers within sight
of the city of Venice. The floating churches, domes,
palaces, and spires of Venice, are now united to the
mainland by a railway thrown across the lagoon. Those
however, who prefer the poetic association of the adven-
ture-suggestive gondola, to the thunder and rattling of
the unpoetic railway train, may still enjoy the luxury
of a transport on the rippling waves. Numerous gon-
dolas, and polite and characteristically attired gondo-
liers, are in constant readiness,

Leila has drawn a lively picture of their approach to
Venice : —

'' It was a lovely moonlight evening as we approached
the Adriatic ; and such a moonlight — so soft and yet
so bright and clear, as I never saw before — a thorough
Italian sky and landscape. The sparkling eyes of night
twinkled like precious brilliants in the liquid azure.
An exquisitely-tinted, bluish-roseate mist, hovered over
the plains which stretched before and on each side of us;
the effect was rendered intensely beautiful — became in-
5

50 LEILAADA,

deed a feeling — as the silvery light of the moon pierced
through it. We rolled on. At length I became sensible to
the salt breeze of the Adriatic ; we were on its shore, and
with an overpowering thrill of rapture, I stepped into a
gondola. Plash ! plash ! as the oar of the gondolier
struck the flashing waves,* and made them dance in
brilliant coruscations. Our gondola swept on, the yield-
ing waters dashing against the prow with a heavy slug-
gish gurgle. Each anxiously strained his eyes to be the
first to descry Venice. There is the glorious city ! as
a dim light was seen in the distance, and a voice of
softened melody came undulating across the waters.
Our gondoliers assured us that the singing proceeded
from another- gondola, and (I shall never forget the
effect) immediately commenced the same wild air, each
alternately singing a verse. 0, that moment ! Tears
suffused my eyes ; the air still trembled with melodious
intonations — it found its way to my inmost soul. We
glided on. A light spiritual haze rested on the waters
before us. It vanished as we approached, and, like a
vision of enchantment, Venice was seen approaching
upon the dark waves. All was novel ; and I felt an in-
describable sense of mystery and melancholy, mourn-
fulness, and pleasure, as we glided into the Grand Canal,
and were in the now sleeping Venice."

The poetic aspect and situation of Venice invariably
awaken a train of similar emotions in the bosom of
every traveller at all gifted to appreciate them. Three

* By night in a warm latitude, every stroke of the oar is followed
by a light, ethereal flash from the water. It somewhat resembles
sheet lightning. This effect is also often obser vecl in a cold lati-
tude ; perhaps, oftener than I am aware.

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 51

days afterwards we find Leila writing : ^^ This Venice is
the city of my dreams ! and yet I never dreamed it was
what it is. My first excitement is not yet over; my
heart has not yet ceased its increased rapidity of palpi-
tation. My mind is full of memory and admiration;
my soul full of intense pleasure and satisfaction, yet so
exquisitely tinged with sadness and depression, that
again and again I could weep with renewed gratification.
My enjoyment is so great, so intense, that I really can-
not command myself to appreciate if

Having seen all that was interesting in Venice, they
proceeded towards Rome. At Ferrara they visited the
prison of Tasso, and the house of Ariosto. Leila thus
adverts to them : ^' The prison in the hospital of St.
Anna, in which Tasso was confined seven years, is a
small, gloomy, intensely miserable cell. The windows
are grated ; altogether its aspect is bereft of any saving
relief : it is a dungeon.

^' In the Ferrarese Library are preserved some of his
letters, and the original manuscript of his ' Gierusa-
lemme Liherata.'

^' The house of Ariosto the poet is an object of great
interest also ; although certainly less attractive than the
memorials of the unfortunate Tasso. He was born at
Reggio, in the duchy of Modena. As well as his house,
the Ferrarese profess to show (and I have no reason to
doubt their correctness), his autographs, the arm-chair
he was want to use, and his inkstand."

Passing onward through Bologna, they began to climb
the purple Apennines, in the direction of Florence.
The ascent of these romantic hills winds among deep de-
files, and gloomy chasms, and profound acclivities; some-

62 LEILA ADA,

times, perliapSj overtopped by a ruined tower. At in-
tervals, a snowy white convent is seen peeping from amid
the thick groves of pine and cypress. The scenery
here, is altogether of a different character to that of the
Alpine regions ; less grand and majestic, but more ro-
mantic. As the road approaches the half-way house
between Bologna and Florence, it puts on an aspect in-
creasingly wild and dreary, until at length, in the gloom-
iest part, we arrive at the sinister, mistrustful-looking,
inn of Covigliajo. This inn was, for a succession of
years, the scene of numerous murders. They were per-
petrated by the mistress, assisted by a servant, and the
cure of a village which lay near. The victims were
travellers, whose riches were sufficient to tempt the
cupidity of the murderers. Their clothes, carriages,
baggage, and everything which might lead to detection,
were either burned or buried.

From these heights, the view of and descent to Flor-
ence, " Frienze la bella," is one of surpassing beauty. At
the feet lie Fiesole and the whole of the Val d'Arno,
stretched out in placid, sun-lit loveliness. This beautiful
vale is enclosed within a fine range of mountains, of the
richest blue and purple colouring, and variety of pic-
turesque forms. The whole of its expanse is clothed
with the most luxuriant vegetation, and in the very
midst of it reposes the delicately fair Florence, lovely as
an eastern beauty. When Milton was afflicted with
that great loss, the severity of which caused his pathetic
and touching lament —

" Thus with the year
Seasons return, but not to me returns
Day, or the sweet approach of even or morn "— -

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 53

he recorded; that were permission given to him'^to choose
the scene upon which he would once more open his eyes,
he would desire, that it should be to look down upon
Fiesole and the Val d^ Arno. " When from the heights
above Fiesole/' says that elegant writer, Mrs. Jameson,
^^ we beheld the city of Florence, and above it the young
moon and the evening star suspended side by side, and
floating over the whole of the Val d'Arno and the lovely
hills which enclose it a mist, or rather a suffusion of
the richest rose colour, which gradually as the day
declined, faded, or rather deepened into purple, then I
first understood all the enchantments of an Italian
landscape. '^

Leaving Florence, after a very short stay, in which,
however, our tourists found time to visit the Medicean
or Florentine Gallery of Paintings and Sculptures, and
a few objects of interest beside, they pressed onward
toward Rome. They took their route by way of Perugia,
in order to visit the superb falls of Terni. Here neither
space, nor the object of this work, will permit us to
detail the features of the beautiful country, and the
various interesting objects which they passed. Our
materials would be superabundant j we, therefore, bring
them to Perugia. Near to this city is its sweet lake — the
Lacus Trasimenus of the Romans, one of the fairest
spots on earth. But here history is over officious.
While looking upon its crystal waters one cannot
avoid a shudder at the thought of their once being red-
dened by the choicest blood of Rome.

" We have visited the lake,'' writes Leila. " On its
shores is the venerable ruin which commemorates the
name of the victorious Hannibal, being called ' For«
5*

54 LEILAADA,

teressa di Annibale.' Here are the passes in wbich
Hannibal so skilfully disposed his troops, and by means
of which he induced the Roman consul Flaminius to
make an attack upon his main body. A number of his
light horse, whom he had artfully concealed, then fell
upon the Roman rear and cut off all possibility of a
retreat. By these rbanoeuvres the Romans were com-
pletely enclosed between the lake and the mountains;
their rear was blocked up by the light horse; the
remainder of the Carthaginian army hemmed them in.
For three hours the Romans maintained the battle with
the most desperate courage ; the presence and example
of their general, Flaminius, inspired them to perform the
most daring acts of valour, and great execution was done
among the ranks of HannibaFs army. In the midst of
the battle a terrible earthquake occurred. It overthrew
many cities in Italy, changed the course of rivers, tore
down and rent mountains, and threw the sea upon the
land; but, according to Livy, the combatants were so
ardent and intent upon the battle that not one of them
felt the shock. With the fall of Flaminius, however,
the courage of the Roman army sank ; they ultimately
gave way, and were cut in pieces by the flushed horse
and foot of the Carthaginian army. No mercy was
asked, and none was shown. I saw a small stream which
is still called the ^ Sanguinetto,' from its having been
red with the blood of the vanquished Romans.

******

*^ But my favourite spot here is the banks of the

pretty little river Clitumnus. I spend hours of every

day reposing upon the verdant slopes, which look upon

its crystal current. It is a spot which infuses itself

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 55

into the soul as peace, and love, and joy, and beauty,
all combined/'

The cataract of the Yelino is thus noticed by her :
'' The falls of the Velino are as grand an object as any
I have yet seen. My imagination is bewildered while
I think upon it. A vast volume of water, fifty or sixty
feet broad, tumbling headlong a depth of three hundred
feet into an impenetrable gulf of boiling vapour, and
then, again leaping over the black crags, forming several
smaller cataracts, but each from fifty to a hundred feet
in height, (for the whole altitude of the cataract is seven
hundred feet;) altogether forms a scene which words
can never express. To gaze upon it is overpowering to
the senses ; there it flows and flows, an eternity of
waters, ever rushing, ever changing, yet ever the same.
It does not descend equally, but falls over the top in
rugged ridges, or rather (and which will express the
meaning better), in thick careless folds. A deep thunder
reverberates up the abyss, yet, it is never the same,
but is ever modulating, ever changing. Now, by the
varied motion, it has a sound which I know not how to
better express than by comparing it to a deep, sonorous
howl, mingled with the boom of artillery; anon, it
rolls a real and crashing peal of deafening thunder;
yet there is an indescribable difierence which is won-
derful to the ear.

" The scenery around is chaste, sublime, beautiful.
In the distance sunny mountains repose upon the bright
blue of the lovely Italian sky, their sides clothed with
verdant vegetation, and forests of pines waving in the
clear and ambient air. Near are groves of golden

5@ LEILA ADA,

orange^ and olives, and arbutus with its crimson fniit,
and the tall ilex.

* * * jK *

'^Passing Narni, and its picturesque but ruined
bridge, and the beautiful Civita Castellana, we entered
the dreary solitude of the Campagna di Roma. The
aspect of this desolate waste, combined with a recollec-
tion of the scenes of grandeur and tumult to which it
had been witness, filled me with a deep melancholy.
To feel that you are treading upon the ashes of a nation
whose sway once governed the world; of an empire
which once existed in the greatest earthly splendour,
the cultivation of whose intellect had attained a high
degree of perfection, and then to look around and wit-
ness this majesty hurled to the dust, and silence and
desolation seated upon its ruins — how very impressive !
The air, which I am this moment breathing, once re-
sounded with the loud notes of the martial trumpet ;
mighty legions and triumphant cars have coursed upon
this very ground ; the victor and the vanquished have
trod its surface; the regal diadem has on this spot been
led captive at the conqueror's victorious chariot; the
mightiest princes of the earth have here licked the dust
and rendered the most submissive homage to their proud
mistress, I ask to see the monuments of this grandeur,
and am pointed to some stunted shrubs, a few mutilated
columns and broken statues, which here and there lie
half-buried in the soil, the dissevered and ruined arches
of an aqueduct, or, at intervals, some melancholy tower.

'' How clear to any mind, even if it be but little
accustomed to reflect, is the superintendence of Provi-

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 57

dence over the creation. Dreadful are the effects of the
unrestrained passions of men. Nations which have
filled the measure of their iniquities are hurled from
their pinnacle of power, their country given to ruin
and desolation, but all work together for good in the
wisdom of him who governs the universe and sees from
heginning to end.^'

They had now reached Rome — the ^^ Eternal city.'*
" We ascended the Capitoline Mount /^ we extract from
Leila's journal; '^before us were a few columns of the
Comitium and the field of the Forum — a waste. Still
looking in the same direction is the arch which com-
memorates Titus's triumph over Jerusalem, the arch of
Constantino, and the huge pile of the Coliseum. To-
wards the left is the Basilica of Constantino in ruins.
At our feet a part of the Via Sacra, the ruins of the
temples of Fortune and Jupiter Tonans, and the arch
of Septimius Severus. Extending our view beyond the
walls we perceive the broken aqueducts by which the
ancient Romans were supplied with water, and a few
scattered tombs, marking the direction of the Appian
way.

" Afterwards we visited that mighty pile of masonry,
the Coliseum. It stands a monument of a debased and
degenerate people, of that depraved taste which rapidly
paved the way for the final downfall of the E-oman em-
pire. I shuddered, as standing within its vast area I
traced in my imagination the deeds of slaughter, the
human butcheries, which had been enacted upon the
spot whereon I trod. Once this arena was wont to be
deluged with the blood of unoffending men, men com^

58 LEILAADA,

pelled to murder each other that they might yield a
barbarous gratification to depraved emperors, senators,
people, even women — yes, even loomen could enjoy the
fiendish occupations of the arena, aye, worse, could at
length appear upon the accursed stage ; and it was
always a virgin who gave the signal for slaughter.

" It is now a stupendous ruin. The ascent to the
great corridor is up decayed stairs, and by broken and
ruined walls overgrown with long grass and wild flowers,
among which the birds build their nests and rear their
young. Looking through the fragments, glimpses are
obtained of the immense area beneath, with its mould-
ering seats and passages rising one above another. Its
immense magnitude, its slowly mouldering ruins, its
awful solitude, its complete desolation, fill the heart with
a conflict of emotions, but the most prominent is a sad,,
yet soft, melancholy — peculiar — indescribable.

"Leaving the Coliseum, we visited the beautiful St.
Peter's. It is massive, majestic, magnificent. We
ascended to the roof, a height of four hundred feet, by
a broad and commodious staircase. I was awed by the
solemn grandeur of the interior. The decorations are
superb and gorgeous, yet harmonious and chaste. But
in truth, from my having but just left the Coliseum, I
had not force of mind left sufficient to appreciate the
majesty of St. Peter's. My heart was full of admira-
tion, my eye of forms and proportions."

After visiting the palace of the Vatican, with the
statues in which Leila could not fail of being interested,
the Castle of St. Angelo, Tivoli, and the pretty lake of
Nemi, our travellers gave Eome a parting glance, and

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 59

went onwards to Naples. The situation of this city is
enchanting : rising like an amphitheatre, it forms with
its verdant shores and magnificent bay a scene of almost
unrivalled beauty. Leila speaks of it in terms of
enthusiastic delight. It was here they bade adieu to
Italy, and turned to the equally classic land of Grreece,
embarking in an English vessel bound to Athens.

60 LEILAADA,

CHAPTER V.

THE JOURNEY CONTINUED — ATHENS — MISTEA — THE MOREA — SPARTA
— THE ^GEAN SEA — CONSTANTINOPLE.

Landing at the harbour of the Pireeus, Leila and
her father lingered to contemplate the lovely islands
anchored off in the blue ^gean, the gulf and rock of
Salamis, the ancient Sunium, the chain of marble moun-
tains which inclose the plain of Attica, the temples of
Phidias on the top of the Acropolis, the olive groves of
the Academus, immortalized by Plato and his disciples ;
and then slowly drove into the city of Athens.

" Visited the Acropolis/' (we quote from Leila), " the
beautiful, venerable and hoary Acropolis, with its mag-
nificent ruins. Thence I turned to the Parthenon, and
with my eye fixed upon its mouldering but majestic
desolation, I reclined in the delicious shadow of the
temple of Erichtheus. There I sat for hours, looking
upon its fallen columns, which in immense blocks, were
scattered upon the pavement by the side of its broken
capitals.

^^ On a piece of ruin before me sat a Grecian girl,
whose picturesque costume, in my imagination, added
much to the poetry of the scene. On the crown of her
head she wore the close, red cap of Albania. Her tem-
ples were bound by a rich muslin turban, elegantly tied
by a costly band set with pearls, and from thence it de-
pended almost to the shoulder, the end being finished
by a tassel. Her dark hair, enwreathed with pearls; fell

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 61

in thick ringlets upon ber neck. A loose robe, open in
frontj was negligently thrown across her shoulders, leav-
ing her wrists (on which she wore bracelets) and part of
her arms bare. Beneath this was a gown of striped
silk, and white stockings and yellow shoes completed
her elegant attire. Her look was pensive, with some-
what of melancholy, but very intellectual, clearly indi-
cating a mind superior to that of Greek women in gen-
eral; and — I can scarcely tell why — but I felt for her
such an aifectionate interest, such a desire for intimate
communion of soul; as quite oppressed me when I re-
flected it could not be.

" From contemplating the Parthenon, I turned to the
Propylea, and the temple of Erechtheus, and of the
Caryatides : all of these are close to the Parthenon.
But majestic as they are — magnificent as they are, the
mind is incapable of receiving their adequate impres-
sions through comparison with the great majesty itself.
In the contemplation of that, the soul has expended all
its strength — it is full of the true emotions of sublimity,
and has no chord left to be excited by the others. As
I gazed upon these great and almost superhuman efforts
of genius, I was transported in admiration and praise of
that great and lovely Being who is the source of all
mind, whom to know is the highest wisdom, whom to
serve is happiness, whom to love is heaven. 0, that all
this may be the experiencq of my soul ! I do not des-
pair. The hand of the Lord is not shortened that it
cannot save. He will lead my ignorant, guilty, soul to
drink of the fountains of repose. He will teach me.
0, I am sometimes quite animated with hope ! My trust
is in Grod, I shall yet praise him : soon he shall arise
6

62 LETLAADA,

upon my soul, and his glory, yes, his glor}?- shall scatter
this night, which prevents my- knowing or doing any-
thing aright, and I will rejoice in the Lord, I will joy
in the God of my salvation. In a spiritual sense, I do
record it, that at the present moment, I am more happy
than usual. I can confidently rely upon the divine
direction in those momentous considerations which now
engross my mind.

*^In the midst of the ruins of what was once Athens,
rises a precipitous mountain. It is surrounded by enor-
mous walls. At their base, they are constructed of
fragments of white marble ; higher up, with ruins of
columns and broken friezes. Its summit, which is
levelled to receive the foundation of temples of the gods,
contains an area of perhaps, upwards of a hundred
thousand square feet. From its top is obtained one of the
most beautiful views of all the space which was ancient
Athens, and the country which surrounded it — divested,
indeed, of most of its gorgeous splendour, its thousand
temples fallen to decay, the great wall of the Piraeus
broken and mouldering into dust, the magnificent Par-
thenon mutilated and destroyed by Venetian cannon,
the slopes of yon beautiful amphitheatre of mountains,
once clothed in forests, in pastures, in groves of vines,
and citron, and oranges, and olives, in towns and villa-
ges— all, all desolate and depopulated; but notwith-
standing this, one glance over to that lovely horizon, the
recollection of which since I saw it, has haunted me
both awake and asleep — one glance on the glorious col-
ouring of the scene, will fill the soul with emotions most
deep, noble, and sublime.

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 63

" With a heart beating quick from association and
memorj; you take a first hasty look — are overpowered
by the comparison of ancient and modern Athens — of
the city and surrounding country when Plato stood, and
taught, and admired on that very spot where you now
stand, and its persent ruin and decay. You imagine for
a moment, that you see the port of Phalerus, the harbour
of the Piraeus, the sea of Athens, and the gulf of Co-
rinth, as in ancient times, covered with forests of masts,
and snowy sails, and proud flags, trembling in the classic
air ; that you hear the murmurs of the busy tribe within
the mighty capital, and the sound of the sonorous ham-
mer as it detaches the huge blocks of marble, from
the quarries of Pentelicus ; that you see the people pres-
sing in a waving mass towards the very place where you
are now seated, to burn incense and offer sacrifice to
their imaginary deities ; that you hear the declaim of
the mighty orator, and the plaudits of the delighted
audience. You f^el what you have imagined; and then
look again, and behold the present solitude and ruin —
you turn away weeping. Let your tears flow ! the
ground is consecrated to remembrance.

''This relieves you, and while you feel the pasi you
are enabled to contemplate the present beauty of the
scene. You see the hills which formed the ancient
Athenian soil, the course of the now exhausted Ilissus,
the scanty Cephisus,* the valleys of Pentelicus, the
plain of the Piragus, the range of valleys and towering
mountain crests which conceal Marathon, and stretch
away to the Acropolis of Corinth, and the lovely ^gean,

* Cephisus' stream is indeed scanty; the Ilissus has no stream
at all.

64 LEILA ADA,

with its romantic islands, Salamis and j^gina, on the
top of which is the Temple of Jupiter Panhellenius.
The whole presents such an assemblage of beautiful
objects, of the wonders of nature and art, such sub-
limity of colouring, such perfection of beautiful and
inimitable perspective, as neither the imagination can
conceive, nor the memory recollect anything like it.

^^How poor and laborious is the effect, when that
which should strike as a whole upon the sense, is de-
tailed in parts ! We may tell of the rippling ocean
streaked with shadows of the richest purple, its hoary
crested waves tipped with the effulgent lights of the
sunbeam ; of islands floating upon its surface, some in
the distance dimly seen through golden mists, and look-
ing as though they belonged to an ethereal creation ;
others bright and clear, their naked rocks and precipices
varied by verdant mosses and brilliant tints — orange,
red, gray 3 we may add to this, a description of glowing
summits, themselves more intensely azured than the
sky against which they repose j of marble columns and
ruined temples, beaming with radiance effulgent as the
sun, yet exquisitely relieved by deeper shadows, and
most lovely colours ; we may tell all this, and more than
this, and yet after all, how ineffectual are the ideas con-
veyed by such a picture V

Engaging a body guard of hardy Mainiotes, they left
Athens, and entered the Morea by the Isthmus of
Corinth. "With an intention to visit Lacedsemon, they
proceeded in the direction of Mount Taygetus, and in a
short time arrived at Mistra, a beautiful little town,
situate at the commencement of its acclivity.

'^ Our drive into Mistra/' writes Leila, "was de-

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 65

lightful. The shadows of evening were fast descending
when we entered its quiet streets. Its situation at the
foot of Mount Taygetus is picturesque and pretty : the
groves of olives, &c., are as rich and as classic as any
I have yet seen in Greece. Indeed, from my observa-
tion of the Morea, I am prepared to say that it does
not yield in climate, fertility, and classical interest to
any part of G-reece, nor indeed of Europe, so far as I
am acquainted.

'^ The same evening we obtained a place in which to
reside during our stay. It is situated in the prettiest
part of the suburbs of Mistra, overlooking the groves
and pastures towards Amyclae and the Eurotas.

" The night I passed very restlessly, between wake-
fulness and fevered dreams of Sparta, and Leonidas, and
Lacedaemonians. In the morning I rose early, and took
a walk among some beautiful trees which grew near our
residence. After breakfast, accompanied by our cice-
rone, we ascended the castle of Mistra, whence we were
to see the spot which once was Sparta. On reaching
the summit I exclaimed to the cicerone, in breathless
haste, ' Now, first show me the city of Lycurgus !'
^ Signora, what did you say ?' ' I wish to see Sparta —
Lacedaemon; this Mistra is not the site of the ancient
Sparta V ^ I think I do not feel your meaning.' ' Show
me the Eurotas !' He pointed to the right, with a
grave and stately bow. ' Now, Sparta, the great re-
public. Palaeochori I Palaeochori ! Surely you know
what I mean !' ' 0 yes, 0 yes, Signora !' cried the
Greek with profound gesticulations. ^I know what
your ladyship means — Palaeochori, great Lycurgus; it
is there, at Magoula/ pointing to the valley. I looked
6*

66 LEILAADA,

in the direction indicated, and saw a small white cottage
and a few trees. ^And this is all/ I said, while my
eyes suffused with tears, ' this is all that marks the site
of that celebrated city, where are the graves of Agis
and of Leonidas !' "

Leaving Mistra, they took the route to Nauplia di
Romania. Nauplia di Romania is a fortified seaport
near the head of the gulf of Nauplia, the Argolic Gulf
of the ancients, on the east of the Morea. At Nauplia
they embarked for the Turkish capital.

Their course lay among the beautiful islands of the
j^gean, " amid scenes,'^ writes Leila, " enrapturing in
beauty and classical interest." Delos, Syra, Myconi,
Scio, Lesbos, Lemnos, were each in turn intensely
attractive objects. At length they entered the Darda-
nelles, the ancient Hellespont, and passing Sestos and
Abydos, they soon arrived at Constantinople.

Here Leila found scenes full of intense interest.
''Every day/' she says, ''Pascend the belvedere upon
the top of our house, and give myself to dreamy and
delicious contemplations. The beautiful objects around
me fill my soul with the most charming images, and
the most sublime emotions; yet, as often as I go, I
experience increased delight."

The walls of Constantinople are now in ruins. " I
know," writes Leila, " no walk in the whole city of Stam-
boul which I prefer to that by its decayed walls. That
triple line of immense battlements is now in ruins, and
covered with ivy. It is four miles in length, and sur-
mounted with two hundred and eighteen towers. From
the historical scenes connected with it, and which have
been so beautifully described by Gibbon, every step

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 67

along it is full of the deepest interest. On the other
side of the road are those lovely spots^ the Turkish
burying grounds, full of lofty and luxuriant cypresses,
and interspersed with the choicest flowers of the East.
In them I spend many hours. I love to visit every re-
pository of the dead wherever I go. Meditations upon
death and eternity are with me, favourite ones ; and no
means should be neglected, which have the effect of
making the mind familiar with that solemn event which
must soon arrive, and through which we must pass to
heaven. 0, that when it comes, it may find me pre-
pared to meet it ! 0, that at that season, I may have
that divine support, and that blessed hope of heaven,
which shall encircle my brow with composure and my
spirit with calmness and delight ! Then — yes, then —
I will meet him with a smile, I will welcome him as my
dearest friend. His gloomy valley passed, I shall be
for ever with my Lord — ever in the presence of him
whom my soul loveth. Lord, prepare me, I beseech
thee ! 0, lift up the light of thy reconciled counte-
nance upon me, for the sake of him who thou hast
promised shall be our Saviour from the retribution which
our sins have deserved! I tremble with emotions
of fear, uncertainty, — uncertainty f — 0, I do not know
myself ! I do not know my conviction ! I do not
know what to do ! I sometimes scarcely dare to think,

lest I am . Lord, do teach me ; do make me happy !

0, give me thyself; convince me, show me the truth ;
yet hast thou not answered my prayers for guidance ?
surely, thou hast made my way plain. Lord, thou
knowest me altogether ; I cannot disguise my heart
from thee. I fear no trial^ no loss of friends, no diffi-

68 LEILAADA,

culticSj so that I am not offending thee, but am living
according to thy written word, and believing everything

which thou 1 may not write. Lord, make me to

know thee ; and, if it be necessary, I will forsake all to
follow thee, and to serve thee. 0, I love thy delight-
ful service !"

To the present part of her diary, Leila carefully ab-
stains from making any reference to the cause of all this
commotion. With the fact that she has commenced to
read the New Testament, we are already acquainted.
But to explain her turmoil and agitation of mind, and
the reason of her remark, ^' I may not write,'^ we must
refer to her writings of a later date. And in these she
tells us, that until she had obtained a clear conviction,
she carefully abstained from making any remarks which
palpably referred to a belief in Jesus as the Messiah ;
she knew that if they were found, they would subject her
to the severest trials.

Who does not feel emotions of deep sympathy while
reading such a portraiture ? How faithfully does it de-
pict the tossing and uncertainty of her mind ! " When
I begin to write,'' she says, elsewhere, " I am in such
a whirl of doubt, fear, and conviction, that I can
scarcely trust myself. But, it would not be thus with
me, if I had any one to whom I could lay open my soul.
Oh, no ! I shall be glad to return to England ; here, I
cannot have any books to help me ; no, nor yet sympa-
thy, except from my Lord : and I do praise him for
those seasons of inexpressible comfort which I receive
from his love. I am determined that I will simply
follow where he leads, no matter how great my earthly
difficulties/'

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 69

And now we turn to our narrative.

A strong desire to see the interior of tlie mosque of
St. Sophia had nearly plunged Leila into serious re-
sults. We give the incident in her own words : " I was
walking, in company with our Turkish guide, one
"beautiful evening, when, as yet, we had been but a few
days in Constantinople. We were near the principal
entrance to the mosque of St. Sophia, when the clear
music of the Muezzin's voice was heard from the high-
est gallery of the minaret. The last notes of the so-
norous and beautiful ^' Allah Hu,"* had died away in
melodious intonations, as we turned to go onward. A
firman, which would permit us to visit the mosque, we
were unable to procure. I had an unquenchable desire
to see the interior, and now that the Mussulmans were
bending over their Comboloios,^ and praying with their
faces turned towards Mecca, it invested my desire with
an additional charm. In a few moments it became
irresistible ; I determined to step up to the Turk who
guarded the door, and obtain a peep within, forgetting,
in my enthusiasm, that my temerity might be attended
with unpleasant results. " Alfi," said I, as we stood be-
fore the entrance, (Alfi, was a mussulman, a descendant

* The Turks have no bells. " Allah Hu," are the words which
conclude the Muezzin's call to prayer. He dwells on the last sylla-
ble, which gives it a most striking and extraordinary effect, especi-
ally if the evening be still, and he have a fine, clear voice ; then it
is solemn and beautiful beyond any other means of invocation.
" Allah Hu," is also the proper war-cry of the Mussulmans, and
the peculiarity of their tone gives it an air of singular wildness.

f " Comboloio," a Mahometan rosary. The beads are ninety-
nine in number.

70 LEILAADA,

of the Prophet, and wore the privileged green garb,*
^ Alfi, come with me a moment, let us view the interior
of the great temple/ * Signora !' cried Alfi, violently
catching my light muslin dress, for I had begun to act
while speaking ; ' Lady Signora, you know not what
you say; you will be cut in pieces, though they had
broken bread and salt with you.f Bismillah ! ge !'J
^ Amaun, amaun,|| Alfi; I forgot that I was in danger :
thank you.' "

After a season of the " richest delight'' at Constan-
tinople, they embarked for Smyrna. As they sailed
down the Dardanelles, Leila cast a longing, lingering
look towards the city, with its magnificent domes and

* Grreen is the significant colour of the Prophet's descendants,
and if we are to believe all who assume it, he nas left a very numer-
ous family. Faith is reckoned as their direct and unchangeable
family inheritance ; and as it supersedes the necessity of good works,
their characters are in general very indiflferent; indeed, they are
the worst of the followers of their father Mahomet.

f For a Mussulman to partake food with you, to break bread and
salt with you, insures your safety as his guest. Even though you
were his enemy, from that moment your person is sacred. And so
far is this characteristic carried among most of the Mahometan
tribes, that if a captured haramy or robber have a piece of bread
given to him by a child (the child of the person who took him
prisoner only excepted), he may demand the privilege attached to
having partaken food with his captor, and must be directly set at
liberty. From that time he is the friend of all that tribe, and of all
others in amity with it.

J " Bismillah," in the name of God. This is the commencement
of all the chapters in the Koran, with the exception of one : like-
wise of thanksgiving and prayer. " Ge," come.

U *• Amaun," pardon, mercy, quarter.

THE JE WI SH CO N V E RT . 71

minarets, and then turned away to enjoy fresh and not
less lovely scenes. Their course lay among some of the
most beautiful islands which stud the blue ^gean.
Their wild and sunny grandeur, their sublime rocks,
their deep inlets, were favourite contemplations for
Leila.

72 LEILAADA,

CHAPTER yi.

THE JOTTRNEY CONTINUED — ANTIOCH — JERUSALEM — ACCOUNT OF

THE HOLT LAND — THE RETURN HOME — ALEXANDRIA ^MALTA — A

TEMPEST.

After a stay at Smyrna, which did not exceed many
hours, they proceeded in the same ship to Cyprus, and
thence they went on to Antioch.

^' The present city of Antioch/' says Leila, " al-
though superior in size to any other of the towns upon
the coast, is not beautiful, scarcely handsome, for it is
not well built. There is not one of the public buildings
which strikes the observer as being worthy of particular
notice, but the view of the town and valley from an
eminence is picturesque, even pretty. The streets are
very narrow, and not particularly clean. On each side
of them is a raised pavement for foot passengers, and
in the middle a deep defile for the horses, but it is sel-
dom that this is sufficiently wide to admit of two horses
passing each other. The river Orontes winds through
the valley, at about three miles an hour. It is here
about a hundred and thirty feet wide, and crossed by
an old but really romantic and picturesque bridge of
four arches. The bazaars are very numerous, and in
them may be purchased all the usual articles of demand.
Here are several fountains, all rather ordinary ones.
One is called the Ain-el-Omra, or fountain of life.

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 73

The water which it supplies is very beautiful, aad being
supposed to possess medicinal virtues, is a great resort
of the afflicted. Between the stones are great quan-
tities of nails driven in by these persons, either as a
propitiatory or a thank-offering to the imaginary genius
of the spring. The Jews here are quite unmolested in
the exercise of their peculiar observances. There are
twenty-one families of them, and they meet in a small
room in the rabbi's house. The mosques are fourteen
in number. Six of these, in the purely Turkish style
of architecture, have tall white minarets, close galleries,
and blue pointed tops, surmounted by the crescent. The
men wear cloth kaooks, long robes, red trousers, and
yellow boots. The women wear white muslin, and veil
their faces with black gauze. Indeed, both men and
women are Turkish in their dress, taste, and language. ''

They were now approaching the ancient land of
Canaan; and let us by no language of our own tres-
pass upon Leila's most touching account of the sacred
and holy feelings and associations awakened in her
bosom, as she first saw it stretched before her in all its
goodly beauty : —

'' How languid is this land which once throbbed
with animation and warm delight ! How silent those
groves and valleys which were wont to echo the notes
of softened and joyous music ! How desolate and soli-
tary those plaiin^ which were the garden of the Lord ! —
a land of fountains, springs, and murmuring streams,
of wheat, and barley, and grapes, and olives, and fig-
trees, and pomegranates, of oil, and milk, and honey.
These hills and dales which even still repose in placid
and sunny beauty, are the Jewish father-land; those
7

74 LEILAADA,

smiling plains their home — alas ! how could I say their

home ? Poor

* Tribes of the wandering foot and weary breast,
How shall ye flee away and be at rest?
The wild dove has her nest, the fox his cave.
Mankind their country, Israel hut the grave.'

^' They are homeless wanderers — exiles. Jerusalem,
although so dear, is not now theirs. They are permitted
to remain on this their ancient soil only by tolerance.
Not an inch can be claimed as their own. A Turk may
scare them from the tomb of their father Abraham. A
look upon the hallowed spot which contains the ashes
of their fathers must be obtained by stealth. Their
land has been

* Trodden down
By all in turn, Pagan, and Frank, and Tartar —
So runs the dread anathema — trodden down
Beneath the oppressor ; darkness shrouding thee
From every blessed influence of heaven ;
Thus hast thou lain for ages iron bound
As with a curse.'

— ' Iron-bound as with a curse.* May that be true ?
O ! if I will believe the truth, I fear it is. How else
am I to explain the position of our people through the
past eighteen centuries ? What adequate cause can be
assigned for our long protracted and unexampled chas-
tisement ? Our fathers, who were guilty of idolatry,
the greatest crime they could possibly commit against
God as their king and lawgiver, were only punished
with a captivity in Babylon of seventy years' continu-
ance ; but though we have ever since entertained the
utmost abhorrence of idols, and have not, as a people,
been chargeable with greater vices than other nations,

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 75

yet that captivity, in which we are at present, has
lasted more than twenty-iive times seventy. What can
be the crime which our ancestors committed, and of
which to the present we have not repented^ that the
hand of the Lord has lain, and still lies, so heavily
upon us ? Whatever it is, it must be some act or deed
of a most atrocious character, which they perpetrated
before our dispersion : an act or deed in the approval
of which we have unchangingly persisted, and the guilt
of which we have obstinately refused to acknowledge.

^' I have read our national records, and I find but one
act to which all our nation have in every age given their
unanimous, and persevering, and really obstinate adhe-
sion. It is the crucifixion of Jesus, the Son of God.
That he was the Messiah I no longer doubt. The New
Testament agrees with the Old. In the 26th chapter
of St. Matthew I find the fulfillment of the 53d of
Isaiah. 0, what glories it has unfolded to my view !
I thank my God and Father for the palpable influence
and assistance of his Holy Spirit, while engaged in its
delightful reading. I am not now afraid to write; I
am no longer intimidated. I never feared the curse of
the rabbis; and, therefore, I have endeavoured to cal-
culate the time of the prophecies which relate to the
coming of the Messiah. These are, I think, in almost
every case, expired; in all perhaps. But 0, my na-
tion, with what heart-rending agony of soul must I
view this act ! The innocent Jesus — terrible thought !
— that he who is the Saviour of his people, should have
been by our nation crucified, and afterwards sneered
at as the Taluiy^ that the Divine Redeenier of the
* The " Crucified One."

76 LEILAADA,

world, the promised Messiah, should be blasphemed in
the miserable, insane Toldoth Jeshu. Weep, weep !
ye Jews, for your iniquities ; let your wails rise to hea-
ven, long, loud, and deep. 0, what will ye feel — who
shall describe your poignant grief when the Spirit of
God convinces you of this guilt — the ^1 J/^^-*
The very land in which it was committed weeps, looks
mournful, and is desolate.

^' My heart is very full. I have read the lovely
Gospel, but I am a poor, ignorant, benighted creature,
and cannot understand it as I wish. 0, that I were in
England ! that I might obtain more knowledge from
the servants of Christ. I am now tossed in a whirlwind
of thought, all-engrossing, yet so agitated and indefinite
that I can select no language to portray it. It is an
agon?/ of soul. I wish to be a Christian. 0 Lord !
calm my troubled spirit. Do of thy loving-kindness
guide me to thy simple truth. Let me rest and be at
peace beneath the canopy of thy love. Teach me tJi?/
law of liberty, as thou in thy word hast described ; and
having taught me thy will, assist me to follow thee, to
give up my own, whatever shall happen to my body.
Amen.

" Now, my Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ, my hope
is in thee, my prayer is unto thee ; in the multitude of
thy mercy hear me. Deliver me out of the mire, and
let me not sink, and out of these deep waters, that they
may not overflow me.''

Almost immediately upon their arrival at Jerusalem,
Leila was visited with a severe and wasting illness. " I
am just recovering from the most severe illness I ever
* The great transgression.

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 77

had. Throughout my indisposition I received much
divine support, yet I have not that indwelling peace I
desire to have, and which it is clearly my privilege to
possess. I want the evidence that I am what God
would have me be. Although I earnestly pray for this
evidence, all seems dark and mysterious. Lord, arise
and scatter my darkness for the Redeemer's sake. 0,
let me, unworthy, miserable, sinful me, obtain thy
promised salvation ! Amen.

^^ It is a solemn scene ! From my window I see the
Mount of Olives, the deep ravine that forms the bed of
the brook Kedron, and the valley of Jehoshaphat where
my fathers lie buried. Beneath me lies most of the
Holy City. With a slight turn of my head, I see the
Mount Moriah, and the enclosure where once stood the
Temple of the Lord. Again shifting my view, I see
the few thin-leaved olives which are supposed to mark
the garden of Gethsemane — the scene of the agony of
the divine Redeemer! A solemn calmness hovers
everywhere around me. My spirit harmonizes with the
time and scene."

The illness of Leila resolved her father that they
would proceed no further in their pilgrimage ; although
his original intention was to visit the Dead Sea, and
various parts of Arabia Petrsea. As soon, therefore, as she
was sufficiently recovered to be removed, they left Jeru-
salem for Jaffa, its port : there they embarked for
Alexandria. ^

'^ Alexandria," writes Leila, ^^ presents a scene of

magnificent ruin and desolation. Everywhere the eye

is met by half-ruined houses, whose symmetry is not for

solitude ; and heaps of rubbishy and fragments of tem-

7*

78 LEILAADA,

pies, palaces, obelisks, capitals, and columns, are
scattered around. The gardens of Ptolemy, and most
of the buildings and groves which environed Alexan-
dria, are no more. Cleopatra^s palace has quite disap-
peared; it stood upon the walls which face the fort.
East of it were the two obelisks called Cleopatra^s
needles. One of them still remains. It is composed
of one piece of Thebaic stone, and is nearly seventy feet
in height; its surface covered with deeply cut hiero-
glyphics. A few of the porphyry pillars of Caesar's
palace may still be seen, and the beautiful front is en-
tire. Near the ancient gate of Rosetta, five marble
columns stand solitary ; they belonged to the colonnade
of the Grymnasium, and are all of it which escaped the
barbaric destruction of the Turks.

" On the sea coast, there is an artificial reservoir,
called the Bath of Cleopatra. Huins in connection
with it indicate that it was formerly ornamented. In
its sides are two beautiful saloons, furnished with
benches cut from the rock. • A winding canal conveys
water from the sea to these saloons, and renders it trans-
parent as crystal.

'' In modern Alexandria, there are no public build-
ings which are worthy of particular notice. The city
consists of narrow, dirty, unpaved, and awkward streets.
Like the other towns upon the coast, the houses are all
flat-roofed, with inconveniently constructed wooden lat-
tices, for the admission of light and air. There are
several mosques, a few G-reek churches, and a convent."

After an inconsiderable stay at Alexandria, they left
for England (via France) in a government steam-ship.

" Day and night/' writes Leila, " we steamed on

TIIEJEWISHCONVERT. 79

witliout mercy. One morning we were at breakfast,
using every means (materially assisted by a slice of
tough beef) to prolong this congenial break in the dreary
monotony of a sea-day ;, when an officer entered the cabin,
and informed the captian that land was seen a-head.
We hastily despatched the remnants of our meal, and
proceeded to the deck ', thence we saw the land, hover-
ing like a gray, sombre cloud upon the verge of the
horizon. This was announced to us as the island of
Malta.

'^At about noon, we entered the noble harbour of
Valetta, the capital of the island. It is a pretty town,
and strongly fortified. The scenery around is of the
grandest character.

" At eight o'clock in the evening, our steamer was
again under weigh. The wind, which for a day and a
half had been boisterous, now blew with the violence of
a storm. It was no matter; our sailing was imperious,
and could not be delayed. The night was a dismal one ;
the heavens and the ocean were all on uproar. Heavy
masses of clouds drifted over the dark and tumultuous
waters, and the gale shrieked in wild chorus to the
dashing billows. We cleared the harbour, and entered
the Mediterranean in a tempest, the wind blowing full
a-head, and directly upon the land. The whole power
of the engine was exerted, and yet it could not be per-
ceived that the steamer made any headway. 1, among
several other passengers, had staggered to the quarter-
deck, and was stoutly clinging to the rails, not far from
the men at the helm. The menacing headland, covered
with surf, seemed close upon us, and ever threatened from
the same point of view. Not an inch did the steamer

80 LEILA ADA,

gain upon her way ; all her power was exhausted, in main-
taining her position. Her every nerve was on the strain,
and as her fiery breath flashed from her huge throat it
seemed to show how mightily she grappled in the
deadly struggle. Sometimes, as plunging long and
deep, she buried herself to the very bulwarks, it ap-
peared as though she were lost for ever in the whelming
abyss ; but she recovered with a shock which quivered
to her centre. She struggled on, labouring heavily;
and as she rolled from side to side with the violence of
the gale, now and then one wheel was deeply submerged
in the water, while the other impotently churned the
air. The storm increased, the wind howled, and the
waves foamed, as though the spirit of the tempest were
gnashing to devour us. I was terrified, as again look-
ing towards the rock, it appeared closer to us, and our
ship driving upon it. I convulsively grasped my father's^-*
hand, believing that the next minute would involve us
in destruction. A hoarse rough voice suddenly bawled,
* Nor'-nor'-west ; keep her to half a hair's breadth V
Full of fear, I turned to look at the men at the helm.
The light of the compass shone like a hopeful star in
the thick darkness. With a turn of their strong arms,
the helmsmen brought the ship upon her course. She
wrestled heavily with the tempest. ' Nor'-west ; don't
let her fall ofi",' cried the same voice. Another turn of
the wheel placed our good ship upon the desired course.
Soon the line of the storm was broken, and we steamed
away from the threatening breakers to open sea. But
the captain walked the deck with a chart in his hand
the whole of that tempestuous night.^^

It does not appear that they met with anything else

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 81

which calls for particular attention. In France they
made no stay^ but proceeded directly homeward ; and it
was not long ere they safely arrived at their sweet
mansion in Cornwall.

On the day following their arrival, Leila remarks in
her diary : " I am very grateful while I acknowledge
the many mercies and kind providences we have ex-
perienced, since I left this, my loved closet. Our travel
has been one of rich and pure enjoyment; but I am
very thankful to be again at home. I feel a blissful
assurance that I am about to enter upon a life of bless-
ing and happiness; and my delight is beyond expres-

82

LEILA ADA,

CHAPTER VII.

Leila's conversion.

We are now brought to the most interesting portion
of Leila's life — her conversion to Christianity.

It has already appeared that her belief in the tenets
of Judaism had received an irremediable shock ; the
absurd fables of the Talmud were cast aside as unworthy
of a thought, and the trammels of rabbinical authority
completely burst asunder. On her return to England
she was only waiting for more instruction in the articles
of the Christian belief, to dispose her to embrace it
with all her heart. One of her first objects, therefore,
was, she says, " to find a company of simple, earnest
Christians."

At a small village, distant about three miles from her
residence, there was a chapel in which was exercised
such a ministry as she desired. This was the nearest
place of Christian worship which presented itself, and it
was here she began to attend. Being aware that a
knowledge of this would call down the severest dis-
pleasure of her father, her visits to it were by stealth,
and, chiefly indeed, except in one or two instances,
solely by night ; and she always sat closely veiled. The
way to the chapel was through a long, dreary, and
solitary lane ; but, at all hours, when it was possible
for her to be present at the services, Leila might be
found, unattended, wending her way among the gloomy

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 83

trees. Her natural timidity was painful, and her dread
of walking alone at night unconquerable, until now that
an earnest desire for the salvation of her soul made her
superior to any bodily fear she might entertain. In her
own ple_asing way, she says, " I was dreadfully fright-
ened during my first essays in the dark. I usually ran
the very utmost of the distance that I could ; my agita-
tion and terror of mind being, during the whole time,
indescribable. Hurrying in this manner, the whole
distance from our house to the chapel was frequently
done in a few minutes over half-an-hour ; but, by prayer,
all my terror was removed, and although I continued to
be just as fearful of going anywhere else, yet I could
always go to, and return from, my dear chapel, without
the slighted perturbation of mind, feeling quite sure
that my Father would give me his protection."

We have said that, during the first part of her at-
tendance, she kept herself strictly secret, even from the
congregation; but, as the influence of the Holy Spirit
applied each discourse more and more powerfully to her
mind, this fear subsided, and, in proportion, she felt
an increased desire to unbosom herself to some Christian
friend, who would sympathize with, and still further
instruct her in that glorious cause to which she had now
engaged her whole heart. Being assured that this
would assist her to the attainment of that peace she so
ardently desired, she conferred not with flesh and blood,
but, with that fearless decision in favour of duty which
ever characterized her, she resolved to seek an interview
with her minister. This was easily obtained ; and she
describes it as " a blessed season :" and says, further,
^' It has stirred me up to seek the Lord fully — to

84 LEILA ADA;

agonize with a determination not to rest till I am ac-
cepted in the Saviour — till my mourning is turned into
joy." And, again, " 0, for that earnest, child-like

simplicity and faith of which Mr. [her minister]

told me. I want to take the word of God just as it is.
This is the faith of the New Testament : this is the
faith God requires, and will have, in order to my sal-
vation. Lord, save me ! increase my faith ; increase it
largely — mightily ; confirm my hope, and fan my love
for thee into a mighty flame V'

She was an earnest and humble seeker of the truth as
it is in Jesus. Her heart had now become intent upon
one great business — the salvation of her soul, and to
this end she used every means, and every effort, regard-
less of personal consequences. This we think, is abun-
dantly set forth in the entries made in her diary at this
important period. We make a scanty extract : —

*^ 0, that I could express half that I feel of love to
that gracious Being who has kept me hitherto, and led
me from my deep darkness into spiritual light. I have
not yet the evidence that he has pardoned my sins
through the blood of the Atonement — through my
Jesus, but I earnestly pray for it ; I am determined to
agonize for it in simple faith. I know, I believe — oh,
yes ! / do believe that Jesus died for me. I thirst, I
pant for the Spirit of adoption, whereby I shall be en-
abled to cry, ' Abba, Father.'

" O, my Father, I thank thee ; I adore and praise
thy holy name, that thou hast removed from my heart
that dark, impervious veil which so long separated be-
tween me and thyself, and so between me and the source
of all happiness. Now through thine infinite mercy, I

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 85

behold thy glory, who art full of grace and truth, and
the form and comeliness of him who is altogether lovely,
even the Saviour and Preserver of my soul/'

^ ^ * ;|{ » ^

" I am convinced by the experience of every day
that I am utterly dependent upon thee for all the
power through which I can persevere. Oh, continue
to help me ! Grive me thy present assistance. Without
this aid from thee, I sink — I die. Enable me to rig-
orously fulfil all the means thou hast prescribed for the
salvation of my soul : and, 0, do thou bestow the bless-
ings which thou hast promised shall attend their use.
Only believe and all things are possible ; believe, and
all the fullness of the blessings of the Gospel are mine,
Christ Jesus is mine, full and perfect salvation — holi-
ness is mine, and the blissful fruition of holiness, in
the enjoyment of God for ever in heaven is mine — •
all are mine through faith. Lord, I do believe ; help
thou my unbelief. Blessed Jesus, my hope is in thee !
take up thy abode in my heart; there reign, and direct
my every thought and act.

" Father, forgive my manifold sins and offences against
thee ! my rest is on thy mercy, through the atonement
of my Lord Jesus Christ. Make me a temple for th}?^-
self. Be near me in the hour of temptation. 0, be
with me in the future; thou knowest what is before me
to endure ; but do thou only make the season of worldly
trial a time for communications of thyself, and I will
cheerfully embrace whatever thou shalt appoint. Lord,
hear and answer my petition ; increase my faith and my
humility, and make me wholly thine, through the

merits of my Saviour. Amen.''
8

86 LEILAADA,

And in a very little time after this she was enabled
to rejoice in the Grod of her salvation; her heart was
filled with joy and gladness, and her mouth with praise.
This dllightful change took place while receiving the
sacrament of the Lord's Supper, after having been dedi-
cated to Grod in baptism. In her diary she thus refers
to it :—

'■^ Bless the Lord, 0 my soul, and never forget this
day's benefits ! I have sealed the covenant — have en-
listed under the banners of the cross, by receiving the
ordinances of baptism and the Lord's supper — but, let
me write while my eys overflow with tears of joy — my
gracious Redeemer has manifested his presence to my
soul, has filled me with the joy and peace of believing.
That blood which the Jews have imprecated upon them-
selves and their children, has been showered upon me,
in the most abundant and unspeakable mercies. I am
happy beyond expression. I do, indeed, rejoice with a
joy that is unspeakable and full of glory. I feel on the
very verge of heaven ; I have experienced a glorious
elevation of soul — Christ is mine and I am his. Un-
speakably happy conviction ! Come unto me all ye
that fear God, and I will tell you what he hath done
for my soul ! Bless the Lord, 0 my soul, and never
forget this day's benefits.

'^ It is a solemn season, a day to be held in everlast-
ing remembrance. When the cup was held to me and
the solemn. words were pronounced — ' The blood of Jesus
Christ, which was shed for thee, preserve thy soul and
body unto everlasting life ! Drink this in remembrance
that Christ's blood was shed for thee, and be thank-
ful— I felt that my God was reconciled through my

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 87

Saviour's death^ and I was enabled to feed upon Christ
in my heart through faith, and with thanksgiving.

" 0, my JesuSj help me now to persevere ! There
are heights and depths in religion which I long to ex-
perience ; my soul is on iBre with the divine love. Help
me to tell to all what a gracious, what a mighty Saviour
thou art. May no motives of personal comfort induce
me to swerve from the character of an Israelite indeed, in
whom is no guile. 0, that thou wouldst give me thine
assistance, and direct me by thy Holy Spirit, while I
make it known to my dear father ! Do, 0 my Saviour,
hear my prayer for this, and to thee I will give all the
glory, now and through endless ages. Amen."

" I bless and adore thee — Father, Son, and Holy
Ghost, that all have united to deliver me from my
guilt and bondage. And now, 0 God, my heart is
fixed : my heart is fixed to live in Christ. Nothing but
the constant indwelling of thyself will satisfy my soul.
O, for that mysterious and incomprehensible union with
my God which shall produce in me mighty faith,
ardent love, lively hope, and active obedience. Blessed
be God, all this is promised ! I believe it. Who shall-
circumscribe the Holy One ? He can so touch the
heart as to extirpate sin, and save with this full salva-
tion ; for it shall be my never-ceasing prayer. Lord,
enable me to feel myself as nothing, and thou my all.
Keep me in the hollow of thy hand. Prepare me
for all thy righteous will, for I have given up all my
soul and body's powers fully and unreservedly to thee.
O, accept my sacrifice ; enter into covenant with me and
ratify it in Heaven. Amen."

Leila's baptism was an interesting — a singularly lovely

88 LEILAADA,

scene. We do not expect ever to witness another equally
affecting on earth. It was our privilege to be one of
four friends who at her request waited near her during
the performance of the solemn ceremony. Arrange-
ments had been made to prevent the gaze of inquisitive
and idle curiosity, by ensuring that none but regular
members of the congregation should be present. At the
appointed time Leila was led from the vestry, her pure
countenance having in its expression more of heaven than
of earth. Her answers to the questions were made in a
calm and decided, but weak and tremulous tone; for she
was bathed in tears. Indeed, we think all present wept
with deep emotion. The solemn act of baptizing her in
the name of the Triune Jehovah having been performed,
the minister delivered an exquisitely touching and beau-
tiful address. This finished, the sacrament of the Lord's
supper was administered to all present, which concluded
a season of hallowed and holy influence never to be for-
gotten.

Having herself become acquainted with the truth as
it is in Jesus, she wept as she thought of the darkness
which still surrounded her dear father ; she felt that her
Christianity, and, indeed, every natural feeling was in-
volved, if she made no effort to induce him to renounce
Judaism. But how was she to proceed ? To obtain an
answer to this question cost her much mental agony. To
her father she was tenderly devoted, and she knew that
he was a strict believer in the faith of his fathers ; and,
therefore, all the prejudices of his mind would be
strongly against her Christianity. To the present period
in her life he had never once spoken to her with a look or
tone of displeasure, and she had at no time crossed his

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 89

will, nor done anything to which he would not give per-
mission; but God was with her, and through the forti-
tude of Christian principle, she was enabled to dare the
worst. And unquestionably, if we reflect a moment
upon the Jewish character, we shall perceive that she
had cause to fear not a little.

Of the means taken by Leila, she thus remarks in her
diary : —

'' I have this night laid a letter on my father's dres-
sing-table ; in it I have detailed the change which has
taken place in my soul; in it I have avowed my belief
in Jesus of Nazareth, and the joy and peace which I
experience in believing. 0, that it may do him the
good I ardently pray for — that it may lead him to em-
brace the Gospel of Christ. I have committed it to
God; I leave it in thy hands, 0 my Father; bless it I
beseech thee. This whole night do I intend to devote
to special wrestling with thee, for the salvation of my
dear father.

''And now, I beseech thee, be thou my helper.
Choose thou for me my future portion ; be my inheri-
tance, calm my agitated spirit; have I not committed
the event to thee ? 0, be with me on the morrow, when
I shall be questioned respecting the hope that is in me ;
do thou be very present with me, and enable me to speak
as becomes a temple of the living God. May I be saved
from bringing any disgrace or disrepute upon the reli-
gion of Jesus — that divine cause which now possesses
my heart. May my feet be firmly fixed upon the rock
Christ Jesus ; and then, whatever shall occur, whether
I live or die, I shall be happy — for I shall be the
Lord's.

8*

90 LEILAADA,

" It is with, gratitude I record that my soul is im-
pressed with a sense of the divine presence and love.
I can rejoice in the blessed conviction that my Beloved is
minej and I am his ! — I have a present salvation. Bliss-
ful hopes — animating prospects are before me. What-
ever results happen to me, temporally, may my soul but
enjoy the presence of Grod, and all will be well. 0, my
Father, baptize me largely, and still more largely, with
the hallowing influences of thy Holy Spirit; this will
renovate my nature, and cleanse the very thoughts of my
heart. This is what I want — inward holiness — to be
holy as thou hast called me to be.

"Each day lays me under increased X)bligations to
dedicate myself entirely to the service of my Grod and
king, and I find the blessed effect of each morning re-
newing my covenant engagements with Grod, my devo-
tion of all I have, and all I am, to him. I desire to
have a constantly indwelling God. Unspeakable love !
that he whom the heaven of heavens cannot contain, will
condescend to come and take up his abode in the humble,
contrite heart. My religion calls me to be up and doing.
My time is short; the veil which separates me from
eternity may soon be drawn aside. Indeed, I am not
able to repress a serious and solemn foreboding that my
days on earth will not be prolonged. How important
that I should prepare ! so that, with holy calmness and
composure I may await the momentous summons. If I
am always ready, it cannot come upon me unawares.
One with Christ, through faith, when I shall hear that
Hhe Master is come and calleth for thee,' I shall then^
in its full triumph, be enabled joyfully to exclaim, 'Even

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 91

SO, come, Lord Jesus/ I am really in a strait : I have
^ a desire to depart and be with Christ/

'' Ere I close my book, I again pray for thy blessing,
0 my Father ; bless, 0 bless, I beseech thee, the con-
fession I have made of thee, and give me strength ac-
cording to my need. Amen."

92 LEILA ADA,

CHAPTEH yill.

Leila's letter to her father.

The letter to which Leila refers, we shall give in full:
it breathes the spirit of filial piety and love, and is at
once a fine proof of her good sense, and an ornament to
the religion she professed : —

^' My very, very dear Father ; — Do you love me ? 0,
how plainly I hear you say, ' How can my dear daughter
ask me this question ? Has she not had proofs of my
affection again and again ? Does she not know that she
is dearer to me than all the world besides V But, my
very dear father, do you love me ? — do you love me ?
Yes, I know that you love me — dearly love me ) and,
my dear father, I love you most tenderly — most deeply ;
so as no language I could think of could describe to you ;
and I know that you believe that I do.

" Well, then, my father, will you not rejoice whilst
your daughter tells you of the goodness of Grod as mani-
fested towards her — a poor, sinful, guilty creature? 0 !
I do so fear you will distrust this delightful work, and
yet not from wilful unkindness neither, but from what
you will believe to be a proper sense of duty. But, my
dear father, with tears of joy coursing down her cheeks,
your Leila tells you that she knows, %h.Q feels all her sins
are forgiven through the blood-shedding of Jesus of Naz-
areth. 0 ! be mild while I speak further, and yet I am

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 93

faint, and my hand trembles so that I can scarcely go
forward.

^' I am so happy ! — 0 ! my dear father, if you did
but know how very happy, I am quite sure of this, you
would rejoice with me; you would not hesitate a single
moment, but would come, as you are invited, and drink
largely of those fountains of bliss, the streams whereof
make glad the city of God. I feel that God loves me,
and that I love Sim. 1 feel that I am his child, and I
have through grace a blissful assurance that, saved by my
blessed Redeemer, I shall see him, and be happy in his
presence to all eternity. And will you not come to
heaven, too, my dearest father ?

" Do not suppose that I am mistaken, or that I am
deceiving myself. O, no ! I am as sure that all my sins
are forgiven through Christ Jesus, as I am of the being
of God himself. I could tell you the very minute when
I first received this conviction, and was enabled to rejoice
in God my Saviour. And if you, my dear papa, would
in this same way test its reality, by possessing for your-
self a knowledge of the love of God, it would alone be
quite sufficient to convince you of the truth of the Chris-
tian religion. When under the influence of joy, no
argument, however forcible or sophistical, could con-
vince you that sorrow filled your heart. The result of
faith in Christ is peace and joy in believing; to this my
experience bears testimony. What further proof can I
wish that its origin is divine ? I do not. I have this
internal consciousness, and am as certain of it, as of
anything that aifects my external senses.

'^ With great propriety we always attach importance
to a remedy that has been tried, and more especially

94 LEILAADA,

too, if the individual recommending it has personally
proved it to be efficacious. 1 once was very unhappy.
Instead of submitting myself to the righteousness of
God, I was going about to establish my own righteous-
ness. At this time I was sunk in sin, and knew not
where to look for one ray of comfort. My whole soul
hungered for food my religion could not give ) it groped
in its deep night for some pillow on which to repose
itself, and find the dawnings of heaven, but all was in
vain till it found repose in the wounded side of Jesus ;
and here may I abide for ever ! . Allow me, then, my
dear father, in the fullest filial affection, to recommend
to you this remedy. T know you are not happy ; you
cannot be happy as you are at present, and this is the
only cure, and it is the never-failing cure, for a weary
sin-sick soul.

^' I need not tell you the train of circumstances which,
in a gracious and benignant providence, Grod used to
produce this sweet change — of course you will under-
stand me as meaning instrumentally ; to God's Holy
Spirit alone am I indebted for that illumination which
enabled me to see Ms way of salvation. And 0, it is
so simple — only believe ! ^ Whosoever believeth on
him [that is Christ] shall be saved.' Christ is the end
of the law for righteousness to every one that believes.
But the proofs that the Messiah has come, and that
Jesus of Nazareth is the Messiah, are numberless, un-
mistakable, and positive. Shall I go on ? I must hope
that you will bear with me.

'' The law, which was given by Jehovah to Moses
upon Mount Sinai, was designed for that land which
was given to our great ancestor Abraham, and for that

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 95

land only, for it cannot be fulfilled in any other ; there-
fore, through the dispersion of our nation, we are in
the position of a people who have a' law given to them
by God which they cannot obey. From what we know
of the divine government we are sure that it cannot
consist with the wisdom and character of Grod, that this
shall still be the law by which we are governed.

" And is not our destitution of a sacrifice bewailed in
our service as a great calamity ? In one of the prayers
that are offered on the Day of Atonement, is this ex-
pression : * Woe unto us, for we have no Mediator !'
And to make up for this want of a sacrifice we have
transgressed the law by our invention of rites and ob-
servances ; a course expressly forbidden.

" Then, my dear father, in the absurdities of the
Mishna and Gremara — the Talmud — see the conse-
quences of man's attempting to supply the place of
God's law. 0! I do think that in every sense that
book is a terrible insult to the divine wisdom, and,
therefore, how sinful ! If it had been desired to hold
up the religion of the Jews to universal contempt, and
outrage propriety, delicacy, and common sense, a more
fitting book than the Talmud could scarcely have been
devised. Moses gave no intimation of this traditionary
or oral law — of this interpretation of God's written
law. The law which was written and laid up in the
ark, was the only law of which he spoke, and that only
was commanded to be read in the ears of all the people.

^' You, my dear father, are, doubtless, as well ac-
quainted with the Mishna as I am, and, therefore, I
need not point out to you — need not quote its impuri-
ties, nor its follies. Indeed, I must beg you will let

96 LEILAADA,

me recall a part of what I have just said ; for some of
them I could not write — you would not love me if I
could. But how impious, to stigmatize God as the
author of such a book !

*'The Jews declare that the Mishna contains God^s
interpretation of his law ', yet this interpretation is so
obscurely given, that it requires an interpretation from
man.

*^ And you know that this belief in the childish fol-
lies and foolish observances of the Talmud has caused
an almost total neglect of Moses and the Prophets ; or,
when they are read, it is so carelessly and cursorily in
spirit, that we never understand their meaning. Hence
we are involved in a fearful darkness. We acknow-
ledge, and honour, the Scriptures of the Old Testament
as divine — so do the Christians : and during many cen-
turies, the deep, rational study of the Old Testament
Scriptures has been confined to them solely, or very
nearly solely. Now, my dear father, this forms to us a
powerful presumptive proof that the Scriptures of the
New Testament are also divine ; for, as the Christians,
who are so deeply acquainted with the Old Testament,
believe in them as divine, it clearly follows that they
cannot be Jiostile books. Indeed, I might say further
than this — that the Scriptures of the JVew Testament
have led them to study those of the Old Testament;
and the result is, that they acknowledge both as the
written word of God, for they are agreed together.
Can we say as much of our inane, debasing Talmud,
and the books of Moses and the Prophets ? Beside,
what man knows much of the enormous Talmud ? and
he that does know much of it, knows this likewise, that

THEJEWISHCONVERT. 97

no mortal can ever fulfil the law set forth, in it. Who
then is safe ? Hence it is that the Jew looks beyond
the present life with terror and alarm ; hence his dread
of death, and his fear that in the grave he will be beaten
by the Evil One, and suffer other terrors too numerous
to mention. Hence he cannot die with holy confidence
and composure, for he cannot be certain whether he
shall be taken to heaven or not. R. Inani, on his
death-bed, confessed and said, ' that he did not know
whether he should be happy or miserable.' Once, too,
my dear father, like the rest of our nation, I was un-
happy and in doubt, and knew not where to turn for
comfort ; but now, through my Redeemer, I am very
happy, for I have found the place of rest and calm re-
pose ; and this can be found in no other way but by
resting the soul upon the atonement of Jesus.

^' Before this I might have said that unquestionably
the law of Moses is not perfect, inasmuch as it leaves
some sins without an atonement; but this is to teach
us to look forward beyond the type to the great Anti-
type— even the Messiah.

"All our nation and all Christians believe that the
Old Testament writings give promise of a Redeemer,
who will save his people from their sins. The prophecies
in reference to this are most explicit, so that if we will
diligently study them, with a prayerful dependence upon
divine aid, I do not see that we can be easily mistaken
as to his person. A history of the promised Deliverer's
life is given : the manner of his death, his empire^ the
time and circumstances of his birth, and other parti-
culars are clearly written. Let us see, my dear father,
if Jesus of Nazareth be not the Messiah ; and if we can
9

98 LEILAADA,

prove it from the books of the Old Testament, will you
not then believe ? 0 ! you must ; I must be sure you
will; and then you and your child will glorify Grod
together. I pray that the Lord Jesus will grant me
the aid of his Holy Spirit, and graciously answer my
petitions for the salvation of my beloved father.

" The Jews admit that they have no certain, definite
knowledge of the time of the Messiah's appearing.
'Hope deferred maketh the heart sick.' ' Our eyes fail
while we wait for our God/ was anciently the language
of our people. The hope of Israel, the Saviour thereof
in time of trouble, they know not. Hence they have
ever been liable to deception, and again and again they
have been bitterly disappointed. That there was a
general and strong expectation of the Messiah at the
time that Jesus of Nazareth appeared, is evident by the
numbers of well-informed and learned men who received
him ; and who were so convinced of the truth of what
they saw and heard, that they willingly suffered the
most cruel martyrdom for his sake.

" But the Jews themselves likewise expected him at
this period. This is especially testified by the heathen
writers, Suetonius and Tacitus ; and a reference to
Josephus, our own historian, proves that from their
hope of deliverance by the Messiah proceeded their
desperate resistance of the Roman power. Under every
misfortune of their country, they still clung to this
hope, and more and more earnestly as its calamities in-
creased. They were buoyed up by it during the mis-
eries of the most dreadful siege which history records —
that of Jerusalem. And we are told by Josephus, that
on the day upon which the city was taken, the poor,

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 99

infatuated people were persuaded by a false prophet to
ascend the battlements of the temple with the expecta-
tion that they would there receive miraculous signs of
their deliverance.

" And that Jesus was the Messiah is confirmed by
the sufferings of the early Christians. Their belief in
Jesus was not a mere matter of opinion, it related to
matter of fact. We certainly know whether we see a
person, or do not see him ', we certainly know whether
we see anything wonderful, or do not see it. The first
Christians united to assert a series of miraculous and
astonishing facts; they were convinced of what they
saw, and rather than compromise or deny the truth, they
submitted to the most horrible sufferings, and the most
cruel oppressions. These they endured, not for a short
time merely, but through a long course of years. But
they had seen the miracles of Jesus, and had, also, seen
him after his resurrection from the dead ; for ^ he was
seen,' says St. Paul, ^ of Cephas, then of the twelve
[apostles], after that he was seen of ahove five hundred
bretliern at once, of whom the greater part remain unto
this present.' Now, supposing the story were false,
would St. Paul have dared to make such an assertion,
and mention in connection with it a host of witnesses,
who, as he declares, still lived, and might, therefore,
have come forward and contradicted this statement ?

^' Then the accounts of the Christians by heathen
writers agree as to their sufferings and numbers with
those accounts we have in the Scriptures. I extract the
following passage from Murphy's Tacitus : ^ In order if
possible to remove the imputation [of ordering Kome to
be set on fire], Nero determinded to transfer the guilt to

100 LEILAADA,

others. For this purpose he punished with exquisite
tortures a race of men detested for their evil practises,
by vulgar appellation commonly called Christians. The
name was derived from Christy who in the reign of
Tiberus suffered under Pontius Pilate, the procurator
of Judea. They were put to death with exquisite
cruelty, and to their sufferings Nero added mockery
and derision. Some were covered with the skins of
wild beasts, and left to be devoured by dogs : others
were nailed to the cross, numbers were burnt alive ; and
many, covered over with inflammable matter, were
lighted up, when the day declined, to serve as torches
during the night/ Now, although it was shameful to
misrepresent the conduct of such a suffering people, yet
Tacitus' testimony is valuable ; and not the less valuable
because he was a heathen, and an enemy to the Chris-
tians. It proves that Jesus suffered under Pontius
Pilate ; and that within thirty-one years after his cruci-
fixion, there were great numbers of Christians in Rome,
as well as in Judea ; and that for their belief in Christ
they were called to endure most fearful sufferings. All
these beautifully agree with the accounts we have in
the Scriptures.

''But now that the Jews have rejected the true
Messiah, they are ever liable to imposture, for they can-
not calculate the time for his appearing ; thus at a loss,
they have always been ready to grasp at any shadow.
It has been so from the time of the impostor. Bar
Cozab,* to that of Napoleon Buonaparte; and so far

* We extract the following note from Leila's correspondence.
" In the second century of the Christian era, the Jews scattered
over the whole Roman empire rose in rebellion. Their leader in the

THE JEWISH CONVERT, 101

have they now lost all pretension to a knowledge of the
true time for his appearing, that embittered by frequent
disappointment, they have uttered the dreadful ana-
thema, ^ Cursed be he that shall calculate the time I'
Yet is the period for the Messiah's appearance most
clearly marked out in Scripture. Why are our nation
sceptical in reference to the prophet Daniel's inspiration?
Simply because it is Daniel who most unmistakably de-
fines the time of the Deliverer's appearance ; and if
Daniel be true, that is, if he be inspired, they have a
deep conviction that the period is past. Therefore, it is,
that they have removed ^ him from his place in this
njiri; and made him one of the writers of the D^^in^>
and not one of the D*KO^ •

" And who and what the Messiah is to be, the Jews
profess to know not, except that they declare to us one
thing, '■ He is to deliver them from their afflictions, and
give them in reversion, joy, temporal dominion and
prosperity, and the triumphant possession of their own
land.' I will notice this belief again directly, ^ When
the Messiah comes,' they say, ' he will manifest his

province of Syria was Cozab, who represented himself to be the
Messiah, and in this he was supported by a celebrated Rabbi named
Akibah. This Cozab persecuted the Christians, struck medals,
and pretened to work miracles. He was crowned King of the
Jews at Bether, and he then assumed the name Bar Gozah, or son
of a star. The emperor Adrian sent Julius Severus to quell the
rebellion. He completely subdued the rebels, took fifty fortified
places, destroyed very nearly one thousand towns and villages,
and slew in various engagements about 580,000 Jews. Em-
bittered by the terrible consequences of his pretensions, the
Jews afterwards designated this false Messiah Bar Cozba, or son of
a lie."

9*

102 LEILA ADA,

claims, and make his mission altogether plain/ How
are thej to judge of these claimSj but according to their
agreement with the prophecies ? How would they have
ever known that any Messiah should be given, except
God had promised him? And has God declared no
means by which he was to be known ? Has he said
nothing about him ; what he is to be ; how we are to be
certified of him ; whether he is to be a Gentile or a Jew ?
Yes : they know something of this, from the predictions
of the Scriptures : they know that he is to be a Jew ;
and they do profess further, that they know enough to
be able to declare that Jesus of Nazareth was an im-
pastor and blasphemer. Why do they not study all
that can be known by the prophecies ; and having
studied, why do they not declare to the world all that
can be told about the Messiah ; so that the Christians
may compare the Messiah in whom they believe, with
the one whom the Jews expect, according to the Scrip-
tures ; so that the Jews may be able to say, ' This is
a picture of the promised Messiah; a history of his life,
acts, death, and suiferings, as drawn from the unerring
standard of Scripture. Judge ye between us this
day !' Why should they hesitate to do this ? The
Christians are ever ready to bring into light their mul-
titudinous proofs that the Jesus in whom they believe
is the Messiah, the promised Son of God., But if, for
a moment, we suppose that he is to come, how are the
Jews to know him ? They neglect the reading of the
only book which tells of him ] then how shall they know
him ? Even should a mighty conqueror appear, it
could be no proof that he is the Messiah, any more than
the conquests of Alexander, or Caesar, or Judas Mac-

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 103

cabeus, or Buonapartej could prove them to be the ex-
pected Deliverer. And even if one should come and
work miracles, he must be brought to the test of the
Scriptures. This our nation admit ; then, why do they
not study them ? They also admit another scriptural
definiton of who he is to be : ' he is/ they say, ' to be
the son of Abraham, and Judah, and David/ But, if
he were to come now that the genealogies are lost, by
what means could the descent be proved ?

It is a visionary and idle theory to suppose that
Messiah will miraculously restore the genealogies. This
inane supposition lays our nation open to imposture
and forgery in this very particular. It is essential to
the very nature of genealogical proofs that they be
transmitted from age to age through all posterity. If
the Messiah were to restore these registers, they would
neither be genealogical proofs, nor, indeed, any proof
at all of his descent. If he were distinctly seen to
create such records, it would prove that he had per-
formed a miracle — nothing more ; it would be just as
availing that he testified his descent by some other
miracle. I speak reverently : I can think of no miracle
which the Messiah, if he be not come, could now per-
form, that could be to man a test that he had descended
from Abraham, and Judah, and David. To restore our
genealogies would, in the opinion of man, bear the char-
acter of fraudulent evidence; and, therefore, it would
not be such as Grod would ask of him to believe. In
God^s dealings with mankind he universally appeals to
the exercise of their judgment, and, according to this
judgment does he suit all conviction by means of mira-
cles. He makes his proofs so plain, so clear, so direct

104 LEILA ADA,

to the reason, that man cannot avoid conviction, unless
he determinedly oppose himself to the truth. When
Jesus made his appearance upon earth he did not ask
men to take it for granted that he was the Messiah be-
cause he declared himself to be so. No ; he exhibited
miraculous signs ; and of what character ? Were they
of a kind which might be forged ; was it possible that
they could be surreptitiously performed; or, after all,
according to human judgment, would they, as proofs,
be regarded as inconclusive ? 0, no; to the commonest
reason, they were palpably, clearly divine. Were they
not ? To walk upon the sea ; to restore the blind ; to raise
to life the dead ; to heal the sick by a word ; to calm the
fury of the tempest, &c. ; can there be any doubt that
these were exercises of divine power ? Indeed, our
Saviour appeals to the judgment of the multitude ; ' If
I do not the works of my father, believe me not !' — I
ask not that ye shall believe my Divinity, except as I
prove it to you by my acts. Of this kind would be his
language in reference to our genealogies : ^ If it cannot
be proved by your own registers that I am the son of
Abraham, and Judah, and David, believe it not.'

" But, as the prediction that he was to be the Son
of Abraham, and Judah, and David, is explicitly written
in the Scriptures, it follows, clearly, that his appearance
was to take place while his descent could be proved by
our registers. Therefore, here again is powerful evi-
dence that he has appeared ; and here, I say, too, that
this prediction is fulfilled in the person of Jesus of
Nazareth. He was proved by our genealogies to be
lineally descended from Abraham, and Judah, and
David.

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 105

" I just now observed, that our people expressly
believe that a part of the Messiah's office is, that he
shall be a temporal deliverer. If this, belief be a cor-
rect one, my dear father, it would show just this — that,
on the coming of the Messiah, he would find them in
a condition which needed temporal succour. And was
not their position at the appearance of Jesus one which
needed help ? Were they not suffering intensely
from the galling yoke of their Roman masters : from
the severe government of Herod, the deputy sovereign
under Caesar ? ' Yes,' they will answer, ^ and if this
Jesus, of whom you speak, were the Messiah, we should
have been delivered from this tyranny V How can you
tell what he would have done, had you believed upon him ?
The prophet describes the Messiah as first to suffer, and
then to conquer; and from this very prophecy, the Jews
have thought fit to invent what I may call a twofold
Messiah — Ben Joseph the Sufferer, and Ben David the
Conqueror. He is to be a conqueror — but in what way ?
Is it not in this ? — That all his enemies shall be put
under his feet : that all his foes shall be bruised and
made his footstool ? And were not all the promises of
deliverance made to his friends ? Were not temporal
blessings, in abundance, promised to these, and shame
and confusion to his enemies? Undoubtedly. Evi-
dently it was thus understood by Zacharias, the father
of John the Baptist. This fulty appears in his beau-
tiful and prophetic song, in reference to the birth of
our Lord Jesus Christ : ♦ Blessed be the Lord God of
Israel, for he hath visited and redeemed his people ; as
he spake by the mouth of his holy prophets, which
have been since the world began : that we should be

106 LEILA ADA^

Raved from our enemies, and from the hand of all that
hate us; to perform the mercy promised to our fathers,
and to remember his holy covenant : the oath which he
sware to our father Abraham, that he would grant unto
us, that we, being delivered out of the hand of our
enemies, might serve him without fear, in holiness and
righteousness before him, all the days of our life/

'■'■ And those who rejected, blasphemed, insulted, and
crucified the Messiah, could it be expected that he would
grant such heinous sinners temporal deliverance ? That,
at about the period of the coming of Jesus, the Jews
were a most iniquitous nation, is proved by the testi-
mony of Josephus; so wicked, that he observes, 'If
God had not sent the Romans as his executioners, the
earth would have opened and swallowed us up/ What
a dreadful place ! And, doubtless, the most crying evil
of these people was their rejection and treatment of
Jesus Christ the Son of God. How could such sinners
expect deliverance ? Did not Jesus weep and lament
over Jerusalem, while he foresaw the punishment which
would descend upon it, and the calamities which would
befall it, for putting him to death ? Listen, my dear
father, to the thrilling passage, as I copy it from the
gospel of St. Luke ; and, 0 that, by the aid of the
Holy Spirit, it may sink deep into your heart, is your
loving daughter's prayer : * And when he [Jesus] was
come near, he beheld* the city [Jerusalem] and wept
over it, saying. If thou hadst known, even thou, at
least in this thy day, the things which belong unto thy
peace ! but now they are hid from thine eyes. For the
days shall come upon thee, that thine enemies shall cast

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 107

a trench about thee, and compass thee round, and keep
thee in on every side, and shall lay thee even with the
ground, and thy children within thee ; and they shall
not leave in thee one stone upon another ! because thou
hnewest not the time of thy visitation.^ What a solemn
subject for deep thought is this passage ! How sig-
nally was it fulfilled !

108 LEILA ADA,

CHAPTER IX.

LEILA*S LETTER TO HER FATHER CONTINTIED.

"Po you ask me what deliveraBce Jesus wrought
out for his friends — for those who Relieved on him ?
Did he not deliver them from those awful calamities
and sufferings which overwhelmed those who crucified
him ? Most certainly : he promised that he would do
so. Permit me, my dear father, to transcribe the pas-
sage. It is in St. Luke's gospel : ' And as some spake
of the temple, how it was adorned with goodly stones
and gifts, he said. As for these things which ye behold,
the days will come, in the which there shall not be left
one stone upon another, that shall not be thrown down.
Nation shall rise against nation, and kingdom against
kingdom : and great earthquakes shall be in divers places,
and famines, and pestilences; and fearful sights, and
great signs shall there be from heaven ; but there shall
not a hair of your head perish. And when ye see Jeru-
salem compassed with armies, then know that the deso-
lation thereof is nigh. Then let them which are in
Judea flee to the mountains : and let them which are
in the midst of it depart out ; and let not them that are
in the countries enter thereinto.' He promised his dis-
ciples that 'not a hair of their heads should perish;'
and this promise he fulfilled. He warned them of the
terrible events which were to happen, and that when
they saw Jerusalem compassed with armies, they were

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 109

to flee to tlie mountains — to depart out of the midst of
Judea. The disciples obeyed their Lord, and were kept
amidst the desolating scourge.

" In reading the page of history we find that, in every
case, nations are blessed in a ratio proportioned to their
Christianity. Mark England ! Christians really rule
the world with a power which is irresistible. All hea-
then, idolatrous, and unbelieving nations are weak and
helpless. Look at the Jews ! they are quite at the ex-
ercise of the Christian will. And at the Mahommetans !
they are impotent as their religion is baneful and false.
Just so of the Pagan nations. When no Jew could
approach the city of his fathers, a Christian church was
peacefully flourishing in Jerusalem. Here, my dear
father, it might not be out of place if I were to say,
that you must not suppose that the spirit of persecution
and oppression which has been so often manifested
towards the Jews, is at all sympathized with by the real
Christian. Oh, no I I have found it to be exactly the
reverse. I find that the real and earnest Christians love
and honour the Jews, as the nation from which sprang
the Messiah ', as the penmen of the Gospel ; as the peo-
ple to whom it was first delivered, and by whom it was
first preached ; as those who in the first ages of Chris-
tianity formed an impregnable defence of the Christian
religion ; as a proof of the Gospel ; and, to say no fur-
ther, as their brethren in Christ, he being the great cen-
tre— the great salvation both of Jews and Gentiles. 0,
I always fintl that a true Christian is ready to acknow-
ledge even that he is under obligations to the Jews
which he can never repay. Father dear, with tears I
beg of you, do not think unkindly of the Christians —
10

110 LEILA ADA,

love the Cbrlstians; they very, very ardently love the
Jews ; and they are such a lovely and affectionate people,
as I could not describe. I have found real and true hap-
piness among them. Their hearts are knit to each other :
the grief of one appears to be the grief of all, and each
is ready to sympathize and soothe. Indeed, I could not
have imagined, a short time ago, that such happiness,
such union, and such affection were to be found upon the
earth. It is a reflection, faint certainly, but real, of
that feeling which pervades the bosoms of the spirits in
celestial bliss. 0, that my dearest father may soon
partake of it too ! and, then — but, indeed, I must not
think, how happy we shall be.

" But I did not say what kind of Christians they were
who persecuted the Jews; well, I scarcely need, for you
could imagine for yourself. They were dead professors
of Christianity, and perhaps not that — for, of the nations
called Christian, the great bulk is composed of men
making no profession; and the number who really and
genuinely possess the faith of the Grospel are very few
indeed. I pray that they may be increased. But there
is no salvation for an unbelieving, nominal Christian,
any more than for a rejecting Jew.

" But whither am I wandering ? I return, and ask,
have the Christians had no temporal blessings conferred
upon them through the reception of the Grospel ? God
has fought for them against the mightiest powers and
brought them off victorious. These blessings are, how-
ever, the minor blessings compared with*the others
which are showered upon the subjects of the Saviour's
kingdom.

*' Yet Israel is not always to be a servant and a by-

i

THE JEWISH CONVERT. HI

word among the nations. 0, no ! A brighter day is to
dawn upon our ancient people ; a day which, by their
conversion to Christianity, shall recover them from their
fallen and ruined condition. This is clearly expressed
in Scripture. It is a part of the new covenant into
which God has entered with the seed of Jacob : ' Behold
the days come, saith the Lord, that I will make a new
covenant with the house of Israel, and with the house of
Judah : not according to the covenant that I made with
their fathers, in the day that I took them by the hand
to bring them out of the land of Egypt, which my cove-
nant they brake, although I was a husband to them,
saith the Lord : But this shall be the covenant that I
will make with the house of Israel. After those days
saith the Lord, I will put my law in their inward parts ;
and will be their God, and they shall be my people.
And they shall teach no more every man his neighbour,
and every man his brother, saying. Know the Lord; for
they shall all know me, from the least of them unto the
greatest of them, saith the Lord ; for I will forgive their
iniquity and I will remember their sin no more.' (Jer-
emiah xxxi. 31 — 34.) And how delightfully majestic
is the prophecy of Isaiah, in which he tells in glowing
and animated terms, of the glory of the church in the
universal conversion of both Jews and Gentiles : ' Arise,
shine ; for thy light is come, and the glory of the Lord
is risen upon thee. For, behold, the darkness shall cover
the earth, and gross darkness the people : but the Lord
shall rise uP)n thee, and his glory shall be seen upon
thee. And the Gentiles shall come to thy light, and
kings to the brightness of thy rising. Lift up thine eyes
round about and see ; all they gather themselves together,

112 LEILA ADA,

they come to thee ; thy song shall come from far, and
thy daughters shall be nursed at thy side. Then thou
shalt see, and flow together, and thine heart shall fear,
and be enlarged ; because the abundance of the sea shall
be converted unto thee, the forces of the Gentiles shall
come unto thee/ (Isaiah Ix. 1 — 5.) Turning to the
New Testament (bear with me, my dear father), we find
the Apostle Paul, telling us the same glorious truths,
and also of their happy consequences. ' If the fall of
them [the Jews] be the riches of the world, and the
diminishing of them the riches of the Grentiles, how
much more their fulness ? For if the casting away of
them be the reconciling of the world, what shall the
receiving of them be but life from the dead ? For I
would not, brethren, that ye should be ignorant of this
mystery, lest ye should be wise in your own conceits,
that blindness in part is happened unto Israel, until the
fulness of the Gentiles be come in. And so all Israel
shall be saved.' (Rom. xi. 12, 15, 25, 26.) It is beau-
tiful ! Their misery and suffering have been deep and
intense, but proportioned to these shall be the greatness
of the mercy exercised, and their happiness and joy.
The blindness is to rest upon Israel, only until the con-
version of the Gentiles, or, as the meaning probably is,
all Israel shall be saved — all Israel shall be grafted in,
when the fulness of the conversion of the Gentiles is
come in, or is coming in. And all the nations of the
earth shall rejoice in their exaltation. ^ And thou, O
tower of the flock, the stronghold of the"aughter of
Zion, unto thee shall it come even the first dominion ;
the kingdom shall come to the daughter of Jerusalem.''

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 113

' Thou art my servant, 0 Israel, in wliom I will be glo-
rified/

" Yet how carnal are the Jewish expectations of a
temporal deliverer ! Is this the spirit manifested by
Abraham, by Isaac, by Jacob ? Did tliey desire earthly
prosperity as their chief good ? Was not the spiritual
glory of the Messiah's kingdom, that upon which they
set their eye of faith ? 0, my dear father, raise your
views from things temporal, to those which are eternal.
Read the sublimely impressive 72d Psalm.

^^But why has such gross darkness fallen on the
Jewish mind ? Why is it that they cannot recognize
the Messiah of the Scriptures? Because they have
abandonded the hope and faith of their pious fathers in
the person of the Messiah ; because they have wilfully
withdrawn themselves from the light of that blessed
volume, by which our ancestors loved to test the purity
of their faith and actions. And why have they for-
saken the Scriptures, and reposed themselves upon the
senseless and absurd fables of men ? They have re-
jected Jesus of Nazareth ; if they search the Scripture,
it bears incontestable evidence to the truth that he was
the Messiah — the promised Son of God. It is a test by
which their religion cannot stand a trial. Then may Grod
early arise, and by his powerful Spirit, tear away the
veil which blinds our people, and thus, their eyes being
opened, may he grant them the grace of repentance for
their guilt and iniquity, and admit them to the partici-
pation of t^^lorious blessings of his salvation.

^' In the Targum"^ of Onkelos, we find Genesis xlix. 10

* The Targums are translations of the Scriptures from the pure
Hebrew of the original into a Chaldaic dialect. After the Baby-
10*

114 LEILA ADA,

— a passage of Scripture to wMch Christians appeal
— rendered thus : ' There shall not pass away one exer-
cising dominion from thfe house of Judah, nor a scribe
from his son's sons for ever, until Messiah shall come;
and his is the kingdom, and to him the people shall
hearken.' This proves that the Messiah has come, for
dominion has passed away from the house of Judah.

^' The rabbis, David Kimchi, Solomon Jarchi, Levi
Ben Gersom, Aben Ezra, and others, among a host of
theological works, have written commentaries upon all
the books of the Old Testament, Our late writers,
while labouring to refute the interpretations of Chris-
tians, in favour of the Divinity and Messiahship of
Jesus, have contradicted their predecessors. They
themselves Jiave admitted it. David Kimchi wishes to
apply the second Psalm to David merely ; but he con-
fesses the words *)]2 Ipt^*^ should be translated, 'Kiss
the Son.' He further confesses, that our pious forefa-
thers had applied this Psalm to the Messiah, and goes
on to say, ' If the Psalm be interpreted thus, the mean-
ing will be clear ; though it seems more likely that
David composed this Psalm concerning himself, as we
have explained.'

'^ And now, my dear father, I have to say that the
accordance between the prophecies concerning the Mes-
siah, and the record of the life, acts, sufferings, and

lonish ca,ptivity, this dialect became the national tongue. Some
of the Targums are entitled to much more credit than others, be-
cause they are more ancient, and the original sei^H^nd significa-
tion is more strictly and literally maintained in the translation.
Others are rather commentaries, with which fables are intermin-
gled. The Targum of Onkelos is held in the greatest estimatiou,
on account of its antiquity and purity.

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 115

death of Jesus of Nazareth, as given by the Evangelists,
is perfect and complete, and — which for a moment I
had let slip' — his resurrection too ; for the proofs of the
resurrection of Jesus of Nazareth, and that it took
place in accordance with the prophecies, are clear, con-
clusive, and beyond rational contradiction. Do you ask
me if I can prove that in him the prophecies are ac-
complished ? I must emphatically answer ' yes !' for
the coincidences are multiplied, precise, minute.

'^ In the writings of David and Isaiah, we have a
series of predictions which foretel, in the most emphatic
terms, the following events : — That the Messiah was to
be a descendant of David ; that his mother was to be a
virgin ) that he was to be born in Bethlehem; that he was
to be of humble birth, and without external recommenda-
tions to pubHc notice; that he was to reside in Galilee;
that his life was to be one of suffering; that he was to
be rejected of his own people (the Jews) ; that he was
to be betrayed by one who professed to be a friend ;
that he was to be treated as a malefactor ; that he was
to be mocked and insulted; that he was to display
lamb-like meekness and patience ; that he was to be
put to a violent death, yet with the appearances of jus-
tice ; that his executioners were to divide his apparel,
casting lots for his vesture ; that although put to death
as a criminal, he was to be interred in a rich man's
tomb ; that he was to rise from the dead, without his
body having undergone corruption ; and that he was to
leave the^orld, and ascend into heaven. Now, my
dear father, all these prophecies are in the book which
you honour as divine. There can be no forgery, for
they were written long before the advent of Jesus. It

116 LEILA ADA, ^

is a well authenticated fact, that long before t.lie occur-
rence of the events described in the gospel narrative,
they were in being, not only in the original Hebrew,
but in a Greek translation also. Will you, my beloved
father, take the Old and New Testaments ; then com-
paring the inspired writings of David and Isaiah with
the no less inspired records of the Evangelists, you will
be fully assured that the agreement is exact, precise.
This is not hyperbolical writing — an opinion given upon
something I wish to believe ; it is but just and properly
true. Do, my dear father, prove it for yourself; read
the Book, and you will be fully satisfied, that all the
particulars contained in the prophecies which relate to
the advent of the Messiah, are accurately fulfilled in
the person of Jesus of Nazareth. At least then, if you
will not do this, let me prevail upon you to read St.
PauFs beautiful Epistle to the Hebrews. It cannot do
you harm ; I recommend it as what I hope will do you
good; and you enjoy elegant literature; well, believe
me, that even in this low sense it is quite a rich treat.

" And I am not alone as a Jew bringing against the
Jews the awful charge of crucifying the Lord of glory.
Among their own writings I find observations by which
they substantiate the charge. In one of their works,
entitled ' Yoma/ they ask the question, ' Why was the
second temple destroyed ?' In the answer to it, among
the principal causes given is this, D^H HN^iti^* ^J£3D-*
I refer them to the 69th Psalm, one which is admitted
by Aben Ezra to be prophetical of the Messi(| ' They
hated me without a cause/ is charged by our Saviour
upon his enemies.

* On account of the hatred without cause.

THEJEWISH CONVERT. 117

'* Nor is it possible that the Jews can be altogether
blind to the curse which has rested upon our nation
through the eighteen hundred years which have elapsed
since the crucifixion of Jesus. ^ What adequate cause
can be assigned for our long protracted chastisement?
is one of their solemn questions. ' What can that crime
be, which was committed by our ancestors, and of which
to this day we have not repented ? Whatever it is, it
must be some act or deed, of a most atrocious character
— an act or deed, in the approval of which we have
steadfastly persisted, and the guilt of which we have
obstinately refused to acknowledge.'

^' And if they will seriously reflect, they cannot avoid
the conclusion, that there is no one deed, to which in all
ages they have given their adhesion, except the cruci-
fixion of Jesus. With that event, too (and they can-
not avoid observing it), commences the era of their
sufi'erings and distresses. Here, what is related of Rabbi
Solomon Marochan occurs to me : while reflecting upon
the iniquities of the Jews, he said, * The prophet Amos
mentions a fourth crime for which we have been in our
captivity — of selling the just one for silver. It mani-
festly appears to me, that for selling the just one, we
are justly punished. It is now one thousand years and
more, and during all this time we have made no good
hand of it among the Gentiles, nor is there any likelihood
of our ever any more turning to good. Oh, my God !
I am afraid lest the Jesus, whom the Christians wor-
ship, be tWjust one whom we sold for silver."

" In A. M. 5588, the Czar of Russia issued an im-
perial ukase, which refused to permit the presence of
the religious officers of the Jew« in his dominions — a

118 LEILA ADA,

decree replete with cruelty and oppression. In conse-
quence of this act an address to the Jews of all coun-
tries was drawn up in London, and, I believe, published
there, too. Doubtless, my dear father, you recollect
this address, and the circumstance which called it forth,
perfectly well. I will, however, select from it one
solemn paragraph : ' These persecutions manifest a pre-
vailing spirit which should alarm the Israelites of all
countries and climes, and incline us to arouse our hitherto
too dormant feelings, and to search our ways, that so,
by tracing effects to their causes, we may attempt to
find a remedy for the accumulated evils which have be-
fallen, and still surround us ; and that we may acknow-
ledge the justice of our Creator, even the King of Israel,
and own that these as well as all the other chastisements
which have been heaped upon our devoted heads, are,
as it respects the Almighty, merited by the sins of our-
selves and our forefathers, as denounced by our lawgivers
and prophets.' And oh ! that Israel may enter into
the spirit of this address — that they may begin that
deep and prayerful examination of their hearts, which it
inculcates. Do they inquire why their devoted race has
been again and again visited with the direst calamities ?
O ! let us roll back the page of history, and trace our
sufferings as they rose from the moment of the erection
of the cross of the Lord Jesus Christ upon the hill of
Calvary. But, while we are humbled, debased to the
dust, by the guilt of giving our assent to the crucifixion
of the Son of God, let us not despair j but, IRl of hope
believe, and become partakers of the blessings which he
died to purchase for us. So shall that dark cloud which
now hangs over our nation, melt before the glorious

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 119

beams of the Sun of Righteousness, and our souls be
vivified by the dawning of an everlasting day. May
God help us to this for his Son's sake. Amen.

" At the commencement of this letter, my dear father,
I told you that I had proved in my oion soul, that Jesus
is the Messiah. This, to me, would, if it were alone, be
quite suf&cient; it is conclusive proof; I could desire no
greater, for it is altogether satisfactory. Through
Jesus I am washed from my guilt ; through Jesus, I
have a joyful looking forward to a glorious immortality;
through Jesus, I rejoice with ' joy unspeakable and full
of glory.' I know whom I have believed, and I know that
he has purchased and ' laid up for me a crown of right-
eousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, shall
give me at that day, and not to me only, but unto all
them that love his appearing.'

" All my tastes, desires, and pursuits, are opposite
to what they once were ; old things are passed away,
all things are become new. It is my constant prayer
that I may have a heart purified, even to its most secret
thoughts and imaginings.

" Having received so much from Jesus, I prayed for
strength to act in obedience to his command, that I
should make a public testimony of my belief in his
name. He gave me this power to confess him before
men ; therefore, I have been publicly dedicated to his
service by baptism, and by partaking of the memorials
of his dying love ; I mean, I have received likewise,
the sacrament of the Lord's supper. Do not be dis-
pleased with me, my dear father, because I did not
before tell you of all I have now made known. Could
you but see how my heart palpitates with the deepest

120 LEILAADA,

love towards you, I am quite sure you would not.
Perhaps, indeed, I ought to have told you before — I
think my duty to you enjoined that I should ', but really,
previously to the present moment, I had not the energy
to do so. Forgive me this wrong.

^' I now commit this letter to you. I beg of my Sa-
viour to attend it with his smile and benediction. 0,
that it may lead my dear father to those streams of bliss,
of which his Leila has already tasted ! 0, that the
angelic choir may have to tune their golden harps, and
praise the Lamb of God, moved by the sight of my
much-loved parent, prostrate at his feet ! How happy
we should be, my dear father, both journeying to Hea-
ven together ! Both having the sweet assurance, that
even death itself could but divide us a few short years.
O do, do begin to serve Jesus. I cannot write any
more ; my paper is moistened with tears : they are tears
of mingled prayer and praise.

" May God be with you, and keep you, and bless you ;
and may he guide you, and lift up the light of his
reconciled countenance upon you; yea, may you be
very precious in his sight, is the prayer of,

^^My dearest father,
*' Your very affectionate and devoted daughter,

"Leila Ada.''

THE JEWISH COJ^{VERT, 121

■" CHAPTER X.

CONVERSATIONS BETWEEN LEILA AND HER FATHER — LEILA IS

SENT TO HER UNCLE.

The night on which Leila's letter was given to her
father, was spent by her in earnest prayer. Of it she
remarks ; ^' I experienced much of the Divine presence
and support, I felt a calm assurance that my Saviour
would work for me ; and that whatever happened to me,
all would be for good."

Daylight came : and with a body made feverish by
watching, and spirits absorbed and depressed by deep anx-
iety, she made her morning toilette. Eight o'clock, the
time of meeting her father in the breakfast-parlour,
arrived ; her spirits sunk to the helplessness of infancy,
in prospect of the dreaded interview. Her father would,
perhaps — nay, almost certainly — speak unkindly; it
was more than she could bear. Eight o'clock passed
— she was kneeling, with uplifted hands and streaming
eyes, beseeching divine aid to meet the event : it was
given, and she arose strengthened.

Entering the room, she found her father already
waiting. Directly she went up to him, and throwing
her arms upon his neck, was about to claim her usual
kiss —

" Leila !" ejaculated her father solemnly, at the same
moment turning his head from her.

" 0, my dear, dear papa !" said Leila, weeping, ^"do

122 LEILA ADA,

not refuse to kiss me ! Do give me my kiss, and tlien I
will try to bear all you have to say. But, indeed, I
cannot stay if you will refuse me this. I cannot en-
dure so severe a mark of your displeasure."

" What have you done, Leila ? How can you ex-
pect me to kiss you? Can you imagine the night I
have spent ? Is it for this I have had you instructed
in the law of the God of Israel, that you should mock
at it, and cast it behind your back ? Is it for this that
I have withheld no means of knowledge from you, that
your learning should become a snare to you ? 0, my
daughter, perhaps my heart has been too much bound
up in you. Now I am scourged ; those hopes I had,
that you would soothe my declining years, are blighted.
But come, kiss me," he continued holding out his
hand to Leila, who stood petrified with anguish.

'' Now, my choicest treasure, tell me who it is that
has poisoned you ; let me know who it was made you a
proselyte from the faith of your father Abraham. To
think that one of my kindred should have become an
apostate — a Christian — and that one, too, my own
child ! But come, my dear, speak to me ; tell me how
your unsuspecting and innocent heart has been misled.
The arms of our religion are as wide open to you as
ever, if you will return now ; and I need not tell you
that I shall love you better than before."

" 0, my dear father," faltered Leila, ^^ no one has
abused my judgment: indeed, it is God has of his
mercy opened my eyes,"

^^ God open your eyes to believe in Jesus of Nazareth !
It is not possible. Do you not know that God has
specially chosen our nation as the depositary and con-

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 123

servator of the only true religion? You are flying
from God, my dear child. God chose Israel, and made
it the sanctuary of the true faith. The nations were
sunk in error and idolatry ; and in many cases their
idolatrous rites and sacrifices were perpetrated under
the holy name of religion. But in order to accomplish
his designs of mercy, in the establishment of truth and
righteouness upon the earth, he raised up Israel, and
declared himself unto them as his chosen and peculiar
people, calling himself by name Jehovah — the one —
I AM. He became our Lawgiver and our King. Read
the charge of Moses to the Israelites, given as he was
about to die : * Behold, I have taught you statutes and
judgments, even as the Lord my God commanded me,
that ye should do so in the land whither ye go to
possess it. Keep, therefore, and do them ; for this is
your wisdom and your understanding in the sight of the
nations which shall hear all these statutes, and say,
Surely this great nation is a wise and understanding
people. For what nation is there so great, that hath
statutes and judgments so righteous as all this law, which
I set before you this day ? Take heed to yourselves
lest ye forget the covenant of the Lord your God which
he made with you : for the Lord thy God, is a consum-
ing fire, even a jealous God.' 0, beware of what you
are doing ! I tremble, my child, for you ; I cannot ex-
press my agony for you. Although in the many ages
which have passed since the giving of the law, the tra-
ditions of men may have become mixed with it, yet this
will not afiect the faithful soul; our religion is still
pure and holy, and still of God ; man cannot change or
deteriorate it."

124 LEILAADA,

" But, my dear papa, God has entered into a new and
better covenant with his people, and Christ Jesus is the
Mediator of that covenant. His is the blood of sprinkling
that speaketh better things than that of Abel. The law
as given to Moses was typical, and it was imperfect and,
therefore, it continually reminded the Jews of their
need of a perfect and full atonement, which should
sanctify and purge their conscience from dead works,
to serve the living Grod. And this new covenant has
abolished all the forms, observances, and ceremonies of
the old covenant, for these were only imposed as a
figure until its fulfilment and perfection in the Lord
Jesus Christ. These stood in outward ordinances but
the new covenant in Christ Jesus has opened to us a
new and more excellent way : ' This shall be the
covenant I will make with the house of Israel after
those days, saith the Lord, I will put my law in
their inward parts, and write it in their hearts, and
will be their God, and they shall be my people.'
Permit me, my dear father, to read to you from this
book," continued Leila, as she drew a small New Testa-
ment from her pocket : " ' For ye are not come unto
the mount that might be touched. But ye are come
unto mount Zion, and unto the city of the living God,
the heavenly Jerusalem, and to an innumerable company
of angels, to the general assembly and church of the
first-born, which are written in heaven, and to God the
judge of all, and to the spirits of just men made perfect,
and to Jesus the mediator of the new covenant, and to
the blood of sprinkling which speaketh better things
than that of Abel.' 'But Christ being come an high
priest of good things to come, by a greater and more

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 125

perfect tabernacle, not made with handsj" ^'by his
own blood entered once into the holy place, having
obtained eternal redemption for us." Christ was once
offered to bear the sin of many. And for this cause he
is the mediator of the New Testament, that by means of
death, for the redemption of transgressions that were
under the first testament, they which are called might
receive the promise of eternal inheritance.' ' Sacrifice
and offering, and burnt-offering, and offering for sin,
thou wouldst not, neither hadst pleasure therein ; which
are offered by the law. Then, said he, [Christ, my
dear father,] Lo, I come to do thy will, 0 God. He
taketh away the first that he may establish the second.
By the which will we are sanctified through the offer-
ing of the body of Jesus Christ once for all. Having,
therefore, brethren, boldness to enter into the holiest by
the blood of Jesus by a new and living way which he
hath consecrated for us, through the veil, that is to say,
his flesh • and having an high priest over the hou e of
God; let us draw near with a true heart, in full assur-
ance of faith, havii^ our hearts sprinkled from an evil
conscience, and our bodies washed with pure water;
for he is faithful that promised.' And through faith
in this perfect covenant, my dear father, I am made
happy, having received remission of my sins. I love
Jesus ; I feel very certain that he loves me. I am
striving for that crown of glory which he has purchased
for me. I seek a city out of sight, even the heavenly
Jerusalem. I seek a tabernacle not made with hands-
eternal in the heavens. For all my help I look to my
Lord Jesus Christ, who is the Author and Finisher of
my faith. And 0, my dear father, that you would in-
11*

126 LEILAADA,

crease my joy, in seeing you thus happy too; in seeing
you serve your Saviour too. Do begin to study the
New Testament, will you ? there is a dear, good papa ;
do read the beautiful Epistle from which I have just
cited • it is St. Paul's to the Hebrews."

" 0 my precious child ! you have thrown me into
great distress; I am much straitened; what will become
of you ? An anathema will be pronounced against you :
your name will be blotted from among our people.
What will become of you, if you waywardly persist?
Why do you think of setting yourself against the belief
of the wise and pious men of our nation ? I am much
affected and really can speak to you no longer, my dear.
But I feel, that, as I am commanded, I must discharge
my duty to your spiritual welfare. You may sit with
me to breakfast ; after that you must enter my presence
no more until a week has expired. Then I will see you
again. If you persist in your apostasy, my dear child,
1 must do what I cannot bear to think upon — what it
will almost kill me to do — part from you, that you may
receive attention and instruction frgm abler hands than
mine."

'* Leila's loving bosom swelled with the yearning of
its deep and hidden tenderness. This was a new, and
yet untasted, and wholly unexpected trial. Her feeling
heart was too full for words to relieve. She sought
where she might give scope to the tearful springs
now swelling in her soul. Convulsively kissing her
father, she entered into her own room and wept there.
From such a separation as he contemplated, the whole of
her affectionate nature shrunk. Yet through the noble-
ness of Christian heroism, she was enabled to look upon

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 127

it without wavering. The first conflict of her filial de-
votion being past, her faith derived fresh vigour from the
conviction—'^ I can do all things through Christ which
strengtheneth me.'^ A stream of heavenly light and
peace flowed into her soul. With renewed dedication
of all she was to Grod, she bowed herself before the
throne of grace, and richly experienced the tranquilizing
and hallowing influences of prayer. She was enabled to
feel happy, eveti joyful, that she was counted worthy to
suffer for the sake of Christ. In a letter which in the
midst of this week she wrote to her dearest female friend,
she says, while referring to these minutes,

'^ ' He knoweth the way that I take : when he hath
tried me, I shall come forth as gold.^ I know, my be-
loved Emily, your heart will mingle its rejoicings with
mine, when I assure you that I am able to say, I have
no anxiety. I think I am seldom cast down except from
purely physical causes. At first I wept with mighty
anguish. Leave my precious parent ! Oh ! could I bear
that ! But when I had, on my knees, surrendered my-
self afresh to God, I ceased to inquire, and with every
faculty of my soul I could say, ' What thou wilt, my
Jesus, what thou wilt. I dare not breathe the slightest
wish.' 0, my lovely friend, help me to praise our glo-
rious Redeemer. How abundant is his salvation. Why
did I so long continue ignorant of his love — the only
source of rest and calm repose. Is he not fitly called
Immanuel — Grod with us ? I prove it every moment.'^

>K ^ ^ ^ *

Not less beautifully does she depicture herself in her
diary.

" I have this day had delightful and intimate com-

128 LEILA AD A J

munion with my God. I felt the sacred fire of divine
love. My desires after entire conformity to the will and
mind of Grod have been intense : my whole sonl was
engaged. I am truly athirst after the righteousness
which my Saviour has promised and so delights to bestow.
0^ my Jesus, satisfy my ardent longings for the indwell-
ing of thyself. What then is all the tribulation of the
world, if the God of love has taken possession of my
soul ? 0, may I be enabled to lean siijSply on Omnipo-
tence, and more than ever feel that things present are a
shadow unworthy of a serious thought. One smile from
thee, my Redeemer, is more than adequate for years on
years of toil and sorrow. It is my grief that I cannot
habitually feel this ; that I do not find a more intense
disdain for the miserable offerings of this vain world.
Lord, enlighten my understanding, let my views of thee
be yet more and more enlarged. So my soul, restored
to thy image, shall begin here that bliss which will
attain to its perfection in the abodes of eternal joy and
felicity.

'■'■ How thankful I ought to be that the Holy Spirit
still continues to visit me with his gracious influences 1"

" There is no precept or command in the blessed. Gos-
pel, for the performance of which God is not ready and
willing to communicate divine strength. The Saviour
never gave orders without furnishing the arms to fulfil
them. I can therefore look to Heaven, and with confi-
dence expect those blessings which I so peculiarly need
at this time."

"0 Lord, my heavenly Father, I beseech thee, endue
me with power and courage from on high, adequate to
whatever thou art pleased to lay upon me. Enable me

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 129

to lay aside this carefulness which now engrosses my
spirit. Lord, help me : increase my faith, confirm my
hope, and let my love for thee glow with more and more
ardency than ever.

" I am impressed with awe ; I hardly dare to hope ;
I am determined that Grod shall be my guide, that I will
follow him in whatever path he shall mark out for me.
To the glory of divine grace I have to record that I en-
joy seasons of sweet serenity and calmness. May I
become more diligent in the use of every means of grace
which God has prescribed. May I be enabled to press
forward, till I have seized on every privilege which is
mine as a child of God, as a believer in Christ Jesus.
Amen."

" The more I drink of the fountain of living waters,
the more I feel my thirst abate for earth-born joys. I
am in possession of a peace which passeth understanding;
I am happy in the love of God.

" When that dark veil which naturally covers our
hearts is thrown aside, we discover a Father of infinite
love, who tritiS us here, that we may be fitted for the
hallowed enjoyment of himself in heaven.

^' In the presence of the great luminary the stars
withdraw themselves. Last evening I saw them most
distinctly ; now they are lost amid the brightness of the
day, and I cannot catch the slightest glimpse of their
sparkling orbs. But as night advances, and draws her
veil before the sunbeams, they again emerge from their
obscurity and shine with lustre undiminished. Emblem
of the trials of the Christian ! When these have cast a
shade over the vanity of our hearts, and thrown a gloom
over the brightness of our earthly views^ how plainly

130 LEILA ADA,

then can we perceive our inward depravity — what reve-
lations of indwelling sins are made to us, and of a kind,
too, whose existence we little suspected ! While we
were surrounded by everything calculated to insure our
ease and comfort, they were undiscovered; but let the
clouds of trial and adversity darken the zenith of our
worldly happiness, and coming forth from their obscurity
they show their palpable existence. These are the sea-
sons when the world is compelled to confess itself nothing
but vanity and deceit, and when the soul is fitted to
wing its flight far beyond the things which are seen,
to those which are not seen, even the joys of celestial
bliss.

^' No matter how heavy, how impenetrable, the cloud
may appear, the glorious star of Jacob pierces the
thickening shadows, and shows himself our unchanging
guide — our morning-star. The more weightily our
affliction presses upon our spirits, the more valuable and
lovely do we feel religion to be, the more do we find its
adaptation to our every want. Then it is she stands out
in bold relief, and shows herself clad in robes of immor-
tality and eternal life.

'^ Let such considerations as these induce me to take
joyfully my appointed share of trial. Let me lose
sight of the world — of all things earthly, and seek after
an increasing resemblance to my Redeemer, that I may
be a lucid gem in his crown for ever. He shall be my
pattern and my guide. I bless God; I love him; I love
his service ; I love religion better than ever. 0, what a
bitter draught is life without Grod, and so without hope !

*' Most fervently do I pray that through divine grace
I may walk worthy of the Lord unto all pleasing, and

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 131

increase in the knowledge of God. May I be enabled
to ' forget those things which are behind, and reach forth
unto those things which are before, pressing toward the
mark, for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ
Jesus/

" To-morrow I am permitted to again see and speak to
my dear parent. My love for him glows with more
intensity than ever. What will be the consequence ? I
cannot tell ; I have given the event to God. My path
is clear — to maintain simply and obediently my belief in
the Lord Jesus, as far as seems necessary to make his
goodness to me known, to avow my intention to cleave
to my religion ; that course will I strictly follow, what-
ever be the consequence. Most earnestly do I entreat
of God that I may have a complete mastery over myself.
0, my Jesus ! save me from bringing any contempt upon
religion ; but 0, that I may adorn by my life and con-
versation, that lovely cause in which all my soul is en-
gaged. I bless God, I record it to the praise of his holy
name, that he does not permit me to be harassed by a
single doubt of the truth of the religion I profess and
believe in, not a single doubt that Jesus is the Messiah ;
on the contrary, each day finds my convictions deepened,
my faith strengthened, my love confirmed. Glory be to
God for what he hath done for my soul.^'

^' Now, my darling, my precious child!" exclaimed
her father, with deep feeling, as she obeyed the permis-
sion to see him again, which he had given her, " come
to the bosom of your inconsolable father, and tell him
you have abjured all your sinful opinions and belief."

" 0, my dear papa," sobbed Leila, '^ indeed I can-
not 3 my belief is firmer^ stronger than ever.".

132 LEILA ADA,

'' Then, my child, it is my duty — you must leave me

as I said. To-day I will write to my brother at ;

while you are there I shall have no direct communication
with you ; all that is necessary will be made known to
me by your uncle. Till he answers my letter, T shall see
you no more."

" 0, it is cruel, very cruel, papa, to put me away
from you, when you are the only being in the world I
love, and with whom I can be happy. 0, how happy
we have been together ! Indeed, I could not have sup-
posed that you would do this ; and you know that my
uncle will certainly treat me unkindly now that I am a
Christian. It will kill me, my dear father ! you have
always been so very and so delicately kind to me, that 1
cannot now bear the very least unkindness or neglect.
But I have never murmured against your will, and I
trust to be saved now."

" My dear daughter feels it much less than her father.
What do you think it is I have to endure, while I see
my choicest treasure removed from my dwelling; my
child in whom my every hope was centered ! The
struggle is deep and severe, and nothing but a stern
sense of duty supports me through it. Now, my dear,
leave me; I am ill."

Retiring to her chamber Leila gave vent to her over-
wrought feelings in an agony of tears. Thus relieved,
she became more composed, and able to prepare prayer-
fully to meet the future.

The morning which had been assigned for her depar-
ture arrived. Upon this morning we find the following
brief, but expressive entry in her diary.

*' Dearest, loveliest, and the best of all, my Jesus !"

And then came the last fond lingering moment — the

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 133

last tender embrace — the last adieu from her swimming
eyes. Graphically as every circumstance of the parting
of this affectionate daughter from her only parent has
been depicted to us^ we must draw a veil over its
further description. Such scenes in life are far too
sacred to be committed to aught but private remem-
brance. It was a deeply affecting one. She went, not
knowing whether she should ever return 3 but the victory
was hers through divine grace.

The domestics (themselves of the seed of Abraham)
ghed abundance of tears. ^' 0, my dear young mistress/'
said one, her utterance choked with grief, '' do come
back again soon.'' '' When God sees fit ; pray for me,"
enjoined Leila; and with a bursting heart, she threw
herself into the carriage which was waiting at the door.

12

134 LEILA ADA,

CHAPTEH XI.

TREATMENT OP LEILA BY HER UNCLE — HER TRIALS — CHARACTER
OF LEILA'S COUSIN.

AVe have remarked of Leila's father, that although
his belief in the Jewish religion was firm and persistent,
yet he was not strenuous in the observances enjoined by
their ritual. But his brother was much more strict.
He was very regular in his attendance at the synagogue,
and he was generally regarded as a pious and devout
Jew. To his care Leila was confided, with a desire that
he would exert all the knowledge he himself possessed,
and likewise introduce her to conversations with other
wise and pious Jews, with the view of shaking her belief.
He was also instructed to guard carefully against her
obtaining possession of any religious works except those
which belonged to the Jews ; and further, she was never
to be permitted to attend a place of Christian worship.
That this, and the purchase of any Christian books
might be effectually prevented, she was never to go out
but in the company of another.

Her zealous uncle began his work immediately.
Clo'seting himself with her the very first hour after her
arrival, he began: ^^My dear child, what dreadful
tidings are these, that you have apostatized from the
religion of your father Abraham ?"

She replied, " Abraham believed God : I do the same,
Abraham's faith was counted unto him for righteousness :

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 135

mine is so too, Abraham's salvation is the same Saviour
as mine ; his faith in the bloody and imperfect sacrifices '
of the old covenant always referred beyond those types ■■
to the Saviour whom God had promised; mine refers to
the fulfilment of the old and the establishment of the
new, by the one perfect sacrifice of Christ, who is the
Mediator of the new covenant into which God hath
entered with his people. I have not committed apos-
tasy. I wish, my dear uncle, I had a New Testament.

'^ I would not listen ; I would not have such a book
in my house. What it contains is blasphemous, and has
been again and again refuted ; and you, Leila, ought to
know all this. Alas ! all that my dear brother said was
too true. What ! do you think that I, and your dear
father, and all your nation, are wrong, and you are
right ? — "

" Uncle V interposed Leila, " from experience I know
that neither you, nor any of our nation, have any solid
joy, or hope, or peace, or even comfort, in your religion.
You reject Christ Jesus, the Saviour; what will you do
for an atonement ? You have none. Do not yourselves
confess it ?''

^' An atonement ! are you ignorant of the Jewish con-
fessions ? I mean those which are appointed to be said
by a person in prospect of death. What say they ? —
and it is even so : ' My death must be an atonement for
my sins T "

"Oh. I that is a terrible delusion : indeed, it is reli-
gious insanity. What death do you mean will be an
atonement for your sins? Are your notions of sin, and
its origin and its nature, so crude, that you do not know
that ' in the day thou eatest thereof thou shalt surely

136 LEILA ADA,

die/ refers not to temporal death merely, but to eternal
death also? This eternal death of the sinner, or an
atonement, God's justice must have. No bodily death,
no purgatorial pains, not even the most excessive tor-
ments of hell, could satisfy Grod's offended majesty.
The sinner must either endure eternal misery — eternal
death, or be ransomed in such a way that Grod can still
be just, although he justifies and restores him to his
favour. If the words you have quoted mean only the
sullen calmness of despair, I can understand them;
they are desperate madness, if they mean anything else.
You said, too, that the accounts in the New Testament
have been again and again refuted. In this respect, my
dear uncle, you are mistaken ; they are capable of the
most triumphant proof. The Sanhedrim could not avoid
admitting that our Saviour performed the miracles im-
puted to him.^'

" My dear, I really must not go into this, I have
listened to you with great patience, and I shall seek to
manifest the deepest kindness towards you; but, be
careful of this, that not a word of your principles is
uttered in my family. I love you yet, as well as ever I
did, and I should be very sorry to suppose that you
should ever cause me to love you less. I will fulfil my
promise — I will do all in my power to save your soul,
but I will not have Jesus of Nazareth preached in my
house.''

" As far, sir, as my duty to God will permit me, I
promise I will make no observation ; beyond this, I
dare say nothing, even if the forfeiture shall be my
life.''

Leila's aunt was a leader of the fashion, as it is

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 137

phrased 3 and now, therefore, she was placed in the
midst of a giddy whirl of dinner and evening parties,
balls, reunions, &c. This, considered by itself, was to
her pure, and quiet, and retiring spirit, an inexpressible
trial. It was her uncle's desire that, as far as possible,
her being a Christian should be kept secret, for, said
he, ^' I should feel ashamed to have it known that my
niece is a believer in Jesus of Nazareth. My pride,
too, would be humbled were our people aware that such
a person is living with me.''

Her personal appearance was singularly beautiful.
Her manners and address were characterized by that
elegance, refinement, and ease, which inseparably attend
good sense and good breeding ; and, withal, by a win-
ning softness and innocence which at once fascinated.
This was remarked by more than one. Among her

relatives it was often observed, '' If Miss T 's ar^u-

ments fail to convince, her insinuating tenderness and
innocence of manner will : in any case, she has the
victory." Of her intellectual power, we have before
us precious evidence. It cannot surprise, therefore,
that she quickly became a chief favourite in this family
circle. And, as she appeared at the first ^' quiet din-
ner and evening party," (it was at her uncle's house,)
clad in a robe of simple white muslin, her aunt could
not avoid a feeling of pride in her niece. Playfully
patting her cheek with her glove, she exclaimed, '^ Oh !
Leila dear, if you were not in such a dreadful delusion,
how I could enjoy you.'^

Invitation after invitation poured in upon her, and
it was not left to her own choice whether they should
be accepted or not. Soon, however, one was sent for
12*

138 LEILA ADA,

a grand reunion and ball. This, she felt she must not
accept. The evil was too mighty to permit of any
course but one — a stern refusal. ''My father/^ she
writes, " bade me obey my uncle as I would himself.
I feel I have already done this too much : I will do so
no more. My obedience aifects my soul, and, therefore,
cannot be given. Although I have striven hard to
keep my thoughts in heaven, while I have been in the
midst of these gay circles, yet I fear it has, in some
measure, deadened my soul ; indeed, it cannot be oth-
erwise, because the music, and singing, and animation
are to me temptations ; then I cannot avoid a taint.
O, my Jesus, forgive me what I have done ! I never,
till to-day, saw the evil clearly. I have sought tempo-
ral peace and composure at the risk of my spiritual
life ; but, now, by thy help, I am determined to do so
no more. My body trembles and is ill at what I know
is to come — what I know will be the result of my con-
duct— but thou, my Saviour, canst give me all necessary
strength; and thou wilt if I have faith in thee. I en-
treat thee, fire my soul with thy love ! Enable me to
break down every obstacle which shall hinder me in my
progress toward heaven : 0 perfect thy strength in my
weakness ! I am full of sweet confidence that thou
wilt : I have an assurance that in the hour of trial the
Saviour will appear for me. Then, welcome whatever
he appoints. I am voyaging to eternity : no matter if
mine is to be a stormy passage ; I shall better enjoy
the peaceful haven of celestial rest. My hopes of
heaven will glow more vividly; my faith in Jesus be in
more mighty exercise. He will save me : I believe it.
Bless the Lord, 0 my soul, and forget not how much

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 139

te hath done for thee ! Fear not trials, Jesus will be
with thee ; the Lord of hosts is his name. Whom shall
I fear ? The Lord is my rock and my tower 3 the God
of Jacob is my refuge !

" 0, that Christ Jesus may but dwell in my heart
by faith, and then, rooted and grounded in love, I shall
be enabled to overcome every adversary, and to com-
prehend with all saints what is the length, and breadth,
and depth, and height, of the love of God — that love
which passeth knowledge and understanding. I shall
even be filled with all the fulness of God. With the
glorious prospect of my heavenly inheritance continually
before me, I shall rejoice with a joy unspeakable and
full of glory. Finally, being brought off more than
conqueror, I shall rise to the mansion of rest which
Jesus has prepared for my eternal home.^'

From this revelation of the workings of her heart, we
may perceive that Leila had some time previously be-
gun to suspect that the fulfilment of her uncle's request,
1^ abstaining from distinctly confessing her attachment
to Christianity, was nothing less than putting her light
under a bushel. And therefore she gave herself to re-
flection upon how far her peculiar circumstances, and
that obedience to her father which the Scriptures en-
joined, justified her in what she now believed to be an
infringement of the law of Christ. For the sake of
that affection with which we cherish the memory of our
dear friend, we feel it necessary to record the assurance
which we have had from her own lips, that she never
made the shadow of an attempt to hide the fact of her
being a Christian.

From the very first she resolved, that she could yield

140 LEILA ADA,

obedience to her uncle only so far as not to seek for an
occasion which would require her to repudiate Juda-
ism j if that occasion came without any effort of her own,
she fully determined that not for one moment would she
compromise the truth by which she was saved. She
felt that beyond doubt the time for her to confess Jesus
had now arrived. From the extract just given she
appears to think that it had arrived before; but she
was quite assured that her position compelled her to
disobey her parent now, and that she might righteously
do so. But what a flood-gate of persecution would be
opened upon her, if she transgressed her uncle's word,
and made it known that he, a strict Jew, had allowed a
devoted Christian Jewess, to be introduced into Jewish
circles, and yet had spoken of her as though she
were a believer in the faith of her fathers ! Leila
thought on all this and on much more than this, and
that she should have to endure sufferings which could
only be imagined by one who was like herself, a Jew.
But she wavered not. Her help was laid on '' One that
is mighty," and with a calm assurance, and trusting
confidence she took her pen to decline the before-men-
tioned invitation, and declare her joyful belief in Jesus
as the . Messiah. The letter was written in her own
sweet spirit; full of a yearning tenderness for the soul of
the person to whom it was addressed ; and noble and un-
daunted in her recognition of the divinity of the Gospel
of Christ. She wrote without first making her uncle ac-
quainted with her intention. To such a task she felt un-
equal ; and therefore left to her Heavenly Father's direc-
tion, the way in which it should be made known to him.
With this act a course of severely increased trial

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 141

commenced. This, as we have said, slie bad anticipated.
To the present moment, her uncle and aunt and their
family had been solicitously kind. It is true that they
sometimes took occasion to scold her for displaying,
what in their estimation of obedience, they considered
too much of the '^Nazarene doctrine'^ as they called it;
but in general, all their efforts to reclaim her to Juda-
ism had been characterized not only by affection, but
that tenderness to which her ardent and refined spirit
rendered her so peculiarly susceptible. Even the re-
strictions of her father they had many times transgressed.
She had often been permitted to go out alone (except on
the Christian sabbath), and she had availed herself of
these occasions to purchase the Bible, and several of her
favourite books. But now sour looks and dogged silence
took the place of approving smiles and bland conversa-
tion ; she was dunned on every hand with questionings
and expressions upon her spiritual state. ''I could
bear,'^ she says, '' my endless catechizing if the per-
sons possessed sound judgment and competent know-
ledge ; but to be compelled to give a composed attention
to the puerile reasonings and empty observations of those
who know just as little of their own religion as they do
of the Christian religion, is quite painful.^' Compared
with her trying situation these reflections were exceed-
ingly mild ; yet a review of them startled their meek
writer, for she continues, "But are not these expres-
sions impatient, and, therefore, sinful ? Lord Jesus,
save me from all disposition to murmur ! It is thou
who hast laid it all upon me. 0, then, enable me to
cheerfully endure it all ! I am, perhaps, not well, for

142 LEILA AD Aj

to-day I have had to encounter more seyere trials than
usual."

Each day her position became more trying. Insults
became increasingly common; so that we find her
writing, " If my father knew the intense cruelty of my
position, he surely would not leave me here ; it is trying
me almost beyond my powers of endurance. My
spirits sometimes sink very low. Lord, save me ! Many
of those who come near me hold in their clothes lest I
should touch them, and as they pass me avert their
faces, their lips curling with a most offensive expression
of scorn. I am not permitted to have any meals with
my uncle and aunt, nor any of their family. All of
them but one, and even the servants, insult me. Last
evening I entered a room in which two of the servants
were working : ' Eudice,^ said one, ' let's turn our coats,
and go and pray to the Carpenter's son to come down
and save us.'

" ' Oh ! don't talk to me. I hate him, and every-
body as likes him ; and I shouldn't think he very well
likes a hypocritical apostate.'

" ' Oh, yes, he does; both he and his people are very
fond of proselytes. They'll promise them anything;
and, as to heaven, they'll warrant them getting in there
if they have to carry them in a basket.'

'^^Well, say what they will, they shall never point
at me as a turncoat Jew; I would rather be a dog.'

" Here followed a torrent of vulgar abuse and blas-
phemy, which I could not write. 0, my Saviour, for-
give them ! I would pray with Stephen, ' Lord Jesus,
lay not this sin to their charge.' "

But in her aunt's family there was one who had al-

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 143

ways behaved to her with uniform and delicate kind-
ness. This was her eldest cousin^ a young man whose
mind, destitute of those unreasonable prejudices pos-
sessed by too many of his nation, was always on the
stretch to obtain increased light, or to communicate it.
His influence prevented Leila from being subjected to
many an intended slight or insult. He very often con-
versed with her about the New Testament, and the
prophecies, and the proofs that the Messiah had come.
In the midst of these conversations, he confessed that
he had long felt an absence of confidence in the reli-
gion of his people. This feeling arose through reading
the Old Testament, and comparing it with the Talmud ;
but he feared to trust his judgment, lest he should com-
mit the error of reasoning himself into deistical princi-
ples, or even worse, perhaps, than these. He had
noticed the character of several Christians, and it
claimed his admiration j but one thing he thought very
wrong — even if Jesus should be verily the Messiah — it
was the changing of the sabbath. He thought this a fla-
grant offence against the majesty and command of God,
and wondered that Leila could think of observing this
<^ sabbath of man's creation." But one by one his
scruples were removed, and his opinions changed ; and
Leila had the satisfaction of seeing him increasingly
incline to become an " apostate" too.

He was far from being a person of timid and ever-
shifting principle. Before adopting any opinion as his
own be af^customed himself to examine it well on every
side; at the same time condensing all the light he could
obt?.:u, and throwing it upon it. When at last his
juJ-ment was decided in favour of a principle, he was

144 LEILA ADA,

prepared to vindicate and sustain it to the uttermost.
At each successive conversation with Leila, his convic-
tion that she was right and his parents were wrong,
struck deeper into his soul, and his exertions on her be-
half became more strenuous and earnest. This hastened
things to a crisis. From his conduct it was "quite
clear that he was infected with her blasphemous opin-
ions-'^ Indeed, it was a fact that he made no attempt
to disguise. His parents were enraged — not against
him, but Leila; and something must be done at once.
Perhaps part of their resolve was taken with the view
of following up the " salutary impression'^ which Leila's
aunt supposed her sufferings would make upon the
family : but we also believe that with it was coupled an
honest intention to make one final effort, that if possi-
ble her poor soul might be saved from the perdition
which threatened it. Her father was written to. He
was told that she had been exerting every means in her
power to convert the family to her abominable doctrines,
and had nearly succeeded in poisoning that member of
it to whom we have referred.

But in the midst of these painful circumstances, her
confidence in God's mercy and love towards her was un-
changed. This is sweetly proved by her diary : —

" Eternal Father, infinite is thy goodness ; unbounded
thy love ! In the contemplation of it I am lost in
wondering adoration. What am I, 0 God, that I
should be so highly favoured ? Where shall I, who am
but dust and ashes, begin to glorify my gracious Parent
and Preserver? or where shall I find a point at which
my strain of praise may cease ? By thy mercy it is,
that from a soul-felt experience 1 am enabled to cele-

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 145

brate thy love. "Whatever I have been, whatever I
now am, whatever in a blissful eternity I may become,
is thy precious gift, my Redeemer. To thee let the
tribute of my gratitude be unceasingly offered. To
praise thee with all my faculties, with all my energies,
is the wish of my soul.

*' Glorious Emmanuel ! I love thee. And now, when
perhaps thy visitations may seem most trying, I rejoice
in the sweet conviction that goodness and mercy preside
over the infliction. With humble confidence I approach
thee, 0 Grod, as my Father; and so I believe that thou
wilt pitifully weigh whatever chastisements thou seest
fit to exercise me with. Is it for me to complain of the
trivial cares and slight annoyances which I feel, when I
recollect what Christ suffered, and suffered with uncon-
querable love and unshaken patience, that I might in-
herit eternal life ? If I am oppressed with anguish,
my faith may still derive fresh courage from the reflec-
tion that the time is coming when God shall wipe away
all tears from the sorrowing eye. At those seasons
when my soul shrinks with a disgraceful fear, let it look
to the bright example set by my Redeemer, and be thus
assisted, strengthened, and consoled. It may be that
fearful is the trial and life-long the conflicts which I am
decreed to know, but, with Jesus as my guide, I may
still say, ^ none of these things move me.' My con-
stancy shall never be overcome. And then, what
mighty joys hath he laid up for me in reversion ! With
what glad songs of triumph shall I mount above the
skies, to dwell in the presence of my Saviour for ever-
more ! Accept my thanksgivings, gracious Father;
thine — only thine I am; and thine through eternity
13

146 LEILA ADA,

do I desire to remain. How sweet the thought ! With
what faith and love does the anticipation of heaven in-
spire my soul!

' 0, how Omnipotence

Is lost in love ! Thou great Philanthropist !

Father of angels ! but the Friend of man !

Like Jacob, fondest of the younger born,

Thou who didst save him, snatch the smoking brand

From out the flames, and quench it in thy blood !

How art thou pleased, by bounty to distress !

To make us groan beneath our gratitude,

Too big to utter ! to favour, and confound ;

To challenge, and to distance all return !

Of lavish love stupendous heights to soar,

And leave praise panting in the distant vale !

Thy right, too great, defrauds thee of thy due ;

And sacrilegious our sublimest song/ "

"^Hitherto hath the Lord helped me/ It is my
privilege to repeat moment by moment the exulting
words. And while through them I express the re-
joicings of a heart grateful for past mercies, they con-
yey also the cheering conviction, that as he has hitherto
assisted, so will he in mercy continue to support, even
to the end. The consolations of the Christian are too
rich — too solacing to be given up, because sometimes
clouds may intervene between the soul and the beams
of the Sun of righteousness. To speak thus seems to
the worldly the height of foolishness. Let it be so.
The Christian can well afford to be counted weak and
ignorant. The things of Christ can only be spiritually
discerned; and to his faithful servants this confident
dependence upon him seems to approach the perfection
of wisdom. It is ever a .source of love, and hope, and

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 147

peace, and joy. 0 I then, let me exult in the favour
of my protecting God. Heaven is in my view, and in
comparison with that, all the sorrows of earth fade into
insiLmificance. It is mine to know that through the
merits of my Kedeemer I am reconciled to the Deity,
and am made an heir of everlasting glory.

" Such are now my feelings, but how often are my
spiritual senses dulled ! how often do I find cause to
deplore my coldness and insensibility to eternal things !
This bosom, which has been so often filled with a joy
unspeakable, and which should constantly beat with
exultation and gratitude, why is it that it ever remains
unmoved ? How very sinful is this indifference ! How
deficient in dignity and reason, as a creature destined
to immortality, must I be, if I can ever neglect such
wonderous love.

^' Do I start when I contemplate the gloom of the
doubtful future ? Away with such desponding and un-
worthy thoughts. I have nothing at all to do with the
events of my life, but submit myself to them, sustained
by the positive assurance that all things shall work
together for my good. Grod chastens those whom he
loves : and I must kiss his correcting hand. Oh ! then,
my Jesus, let me calmly leave all I am with thee.
Help me to confide peacefully in thy protecting care,
and repose in thy perfect wisdom. May my soul now
rise above this cheerless world and turn to thee — the
Mighty Jehovah — the Eternal ! So shall I find peace,
and love, and joy, for ever and ever."

" How deep is this stillness ! broken only by the solemn
ticking of my watch at my side. Tremendous monitor !
How mighty is the silent eloquence with which thou

148

L E ILA ADA

tellest me it is now just midniglit. This minute sepa-
rates the day which has closed from that which now
opens upon me. An all-pervading awe surrounds my
spirit. The day — the future-^eternity — is beginning.
Let me dedicate these solemn moments in a grateful act
of worship to my God.

*' G-reat and adorable Creator ! with unaffected rever-
ence and humility I bend before thy awful throne,
and worship and adore thee as the purchaser of my
glorious immortality. By thy grace I have been safely
brought through the sorrows and difficulties of another
day. Grant that my soul may have a proper sense of
thy mercy, and justly value the love which thou hast
displayed towards it, in the day that has now for ever
fled into eternity. Lord, I am thankful; and. before I
sleep, I desire to feel that thou hast accepted the tri-
bute of my gratitude. Pardon all my offences against
thee, whether they have proceeded from weakness or a
more blamable source. Amidst thought and distrac-
tion did I forget thee, 0 my indulgent Father? Have
I earnestly coveted to be like my Saviour, loving and
holy, meek and humble, gentle and affectionate, patient
and resigned, disinterested and unwearied in my efforts
to do all the good which my present circumstances
admit ? Alas I how defective is my deportment before
mankind and thee. May my gracious God look down
in loving compassion upon his erring child. I long for
a complete devotion to my Saviour. Oh ! teach me
more and more of thyself, my Jesus; and more and
more fit me for immortality. Help me to abhor what is
evil, and eagerly pursue everything that is good. To
this end let all my thoughts; and hopes, and aims be

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 149

directed. If in thy wisdom it is determined that this
day shall introduce me to the eternal world^ 0 ! help,
sustain me still , and grant that with unshaken faith in
my Kedeemer, T may tranquilly pass from earth into
that state of being, in which all sublunary sorrows and
anxieties are dismissed for ever 3 and where to per-
fectly knowj and love, and adore thee will be the con-
summation of blessedness. Amen.''

" A constant sense of the Omnipresence of Grod
would be the most prevailing incentive to a devotional
holy frame of mind. All my words, thoughts, and
actions are known to him. Every pure aspiration,
every inward struggle, every victory gained over sin, is
observed by the Deity. How should my worn spirit be
cheered by such a conviction ! My secret anguish is
not unknown to thee, my Heavenly Father, and thou
wilt not pass over it with cold indifference. At an age
when I could least bear it, I have been violently torn
from the parental bosom, in which I have so loved to
nestle and be cherished. But it is enough, my Saviour,
that thou seest it, and hast willed it should be so.
Satisfied that thou lovest me too well to be unkind,
may I repose upon the assurance, that, no matter what
are my difficulties, they shall tend to my eternal benefit.
It is true my way may be obscured by clouds and
gloom, but the conviction that thou art watching over
me, and counting all my tears, shall make me rejoice.

" Never did I feel more than I do at this time the
importance and beauty of religion. I love my Saviour;
I am o'er-canopied by his wings; and I am happy. I
have seen a glimpse of his glory whom my soul loveth;
and I long — I pant most ardently to be lost in God.
13^

150 LEILAADA,

* 0 could I lose myself in thee, -

Thy depth of mercy prove,
Thou vast unfathomable sea

Of unexhausted love !'

I am athirst for a state of everlasting happiness ; for
those immortal joys which live in the presence of my
Saviour for ever. A holy, solemn calm flows o'er my
heart — yes, I have a sweet impression that I soon shall
join the spirit-music of the skies. Do I deceive my-
self ? A little time will answer me."

In proportion as sorrows thickened around her, so
did her faith increase, constantly pointing her to the
mansions of everlasting peace — to the ^' floods of celes-
tial light.'' These ardent aspirations after the love and
rest which remain for the children of God, were ever
breathing within her soul. In one of her reflections,
written while she was with her uncle, after beautifully
expressing her deep trust and repose on the arm of her
Hedeemer, she dilates in glowing terms upon her in-
tense expectation of the peacefulness of heaven ; and
concludes by animating her soul in the beautiful lan-
guage of one of her own verses :

" Beyond the gulf of death,
Go seek the realms of love's immortal rest
Where the black storm ne'er spreads its threatening crest.

Where sorrow sends no breath."

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 151

CHAPTER XII.

THE FINAL EFFORT TO RECLAIM HER — CUT OFF FROM HER NATION

— HER ACQUAINTANCE WITH MISS H , — RETURNS TO HER

FATHER — "how SOON WE FADE."

One afternoon, Leila's aunt expressed a desire that
on that occasion she would dine with the family. It
was a pleasing surprise ; and her mind was filled with
imaginings of the probable cause. She thought — perj
haps her uncle and aunt seeing her constancy, were
about to change their conduct, and permit her to return
home; perhaps her father had sent for her; perhaps he
was that evening expected; perhaps he had become
favourable to Christianity ; perhaps the hatred of her
uncle and aunt towards it was partially removed; yet,
no I that could not be, for they had not been any kinder
to her ; their enraged dislike appeared as great as ever.
Well, then, it was almost certain that she was going
home ; her father had either sent for her or was coming for
her; and if he were averse as ever to Christianity, and
if he would not permit her in his presence, it was a
delightful thought that she would be under the same
roof with him ; she would at least be exempted from
contumely and insult. Oh ! how happy she felt on that
afternoon. She went to her Bible, and read its pro-
mises, and thought how richly in her experience they
had been fulfilled, and were still fulfilling ; how abund-
antly God had been with her, and supported her to that
moment — the extremity of her trial, for in her father's

152 LEILA ADA

house she would suffer nothing equal to what she was
then enduring.

" All this afternoon/' she writes, " I have read my
Bible through tears of pure and exceeding joy. God
has been eminently with me : I never felt such a weight
of glory. The manifestations of his presence have been
overpowering, so that I was compelled to exclaim,
' Lord, enlarge, enlarge the vessel, or my clay tenement
must sink beneath this mighty revelation of thy love !'
Oh ! what must be the bliss of heaven ! I lon^ for
heaven ! I thirst for heaven I If I can enjoy so much
on earth, what must be the ecstatic raptures of the
spirits in glory j their faculties no longer clouded by the
body — no more shackled by sense I Glory be to Father,
Son, and Holy Ghost, for this glorious foretaste of celes-
tial joys ! I have drunk deeply of those vivifying
streams which flow from before the throne of God and
the Lamb for ever. 0, the love of God — the boundless,
unfathomable love of God ! lam Christ's; and I can
constantly live upon him in my heart by faith. Bless
the Lord, 0 my soul I and to all eternity remember the
blessings which thou hast this day received."

Dinner-time approached, still she was left unnoticed
and alone. She heard a servant remark, " The dear
rabbis have just come." There was to be company then.
A bell hung upon the staircase above the room which
she generally occupied. The servants had named it the
*' Christian's bell " because it was usual to call Leila by
it, whenever her attendance was required. The Chris-
tian's bell was rung, and with deeply wounded sensibili-
ties, Leila obediently prepared to obey the summons.
As she was descending the stairs, she was met by her

I

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 153

cousin — his eyes flashing, and bis lips firmly compressed
■with subdued indignation. "Leila/' he cried, ''this
is abominable. I did not know till this moment that they
intended to be so gracious as to let you sit with us ;
else you should not have been used as you have. '^

" Do not mind me, " replied Leila, and leaning upon
his arm, she entered the dining room.

Here she found two rabbis, and several elders, and
other Jews, whom she had seen before, with one or
two whom, to the present time, she had never seen.
They rose to receive her with apparent affection, and
throughout the dinner-time, maintained towards her
a kind solicitude. All this conspired to give an as-
surance that another trial awaited her ; and she
prayed that if it were so, God would be with and sup-
port her.

Dinner was ended ; and accompanied by her uncle
and aunt, the guests adjourned to another room. It
was intimated that Leila was to follow. Her only friend
first called her aside — ''Leila," said he, "I know what
awaits you ; but be firm, and seek to keep yourself com-
posed. God will be with you ; I know he will. We
are commanded to abstain from entering the room, but
they should not have kept me out, only I dare not trust
myself. I am sensitive, and I know not what conse-
quences might follow if they treated you uncourteously.
I am proud ; you are meek and humble, and I believe
will do best alone."

That none of the conversation might be overheard,
the door of the room which lay beyond that one in
which they now were, was fastened. Upon the table
before them, a number of the principal books of Jewish

154 LEILA ADA,

learning and theology were arranged. Among these
were the Talmud, the Targums, Commentaries, Moreh,*
the Hagiographa, &c. Leila had only the Bible, and
this she had not by permission (for they did not know
she possessed one), but because she always carried it
with her. Indeed, as soon as they saw her draw it
forth on this occasion, it became a matter of discussion
whether it should not be taken from her ; and from their
manner it was evident, that had they not intended to
first ply her with blandness and seeming affection, she
would not have been allowed to retain it.

One of the rabbis commenced with a long address,
setting forth their love for her and her father ; their in-
tense solicitude for her soul; her breach of the com-
mandments by grieving and disobeying her parent and
relatives, &c. He concluded thus: "It is only this
feeling of earnestness for your eternal welfare, which
calls us here to-night. We wish, by dispensing to you
our light, to free you from that fatal delusion and
snare which is thrown around you. To this end we
proceed orderly : we will patiently listen to all your
answers to our questions, and to every remark you
may interject."

Through a disquisition of seven hours, Leila modestly,
but firmly, maintained her position. How delightful
it is to contemplate this youthful Christian (for she was
now but just entered on the twentieth year of her age),
reasoning with these eight of her nation through so
many hours ; all of them, too, well-skilled in Jewish
learning. There she sat, calm and composed — no friend

* " Moreh," or " Guide to the Perplexed," the most celebrated
work of Rabbi Moses Ben Maimon.

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 155

but God and her Bible, no help but her memory — at-
tempting to prove and disprove, as far as they gave
her the opportunity.

Their promised patience and kindness were early
exhausted. Each repeated essay to prove that Jesus is
the Messiah, was met by the most intemperate refusals
to listen. Most of the time was occupied in putting to
her questions quite irrelevant ; in harangues from the
elders and rabbis ; and in reading large quotations from
their books.

Finding, at length, that her religion was not to be
shaken by anything they could say or do, and con-
founded by her references to their own Scriptures, the
smouldering fires of their ill-concealed rage burst forth.
^' God hath done with thee," exclaimed a rabbi ; " He
hath spoken to thee, blaspheming apostate, by the
mouth of us his servants for the last time."

Leila quoted 1 Cor. i. 21 — 24, and then inquired,
" Will you, (I will ask no more than this) — will you
permit me to demonstrate to you the fact of Christ's
resurrection from the dead ?"

'' I tell you," said the rabbi, '^we have proved to you
from our writings, that Jesus of Nazareth was an im-
postor and seducer : that the Messiah has not yet come.
You have hardened your heart ; we will hear no more."

'' Sir, it is too much to say you have proved it. For
the honour of my Divine Master, I must declare the
truth — you have not done so ; yourselves know it. You
have said nothing really convincing ; you have brought
forward no sound evidence : this you must surely feel,
unless you have forgotten the nature of what you have
said. My weak self could, with the help of God, have re-

156 LEILA ADA,

fated all I have heard to-night against the Messiaship
of Jesus/'

*' Wilt thou then deny it, young incorrigible ? Wilt
thou put all present to the lie ? Then, on God's behalf,
I smite thee ;" and he struck her upon the cheek.

The other rabbi rose : ^' Miss T , I ask you once

more, and it is the last time, will you still believe in
Jesus of Nazareth as your Messiah V

" I do — I will — I ever shall ; and I hope soon to be
in Heaven with him."

" Ha V sneered an elder, and the same moment he
spat in her face. Leila buried it in her handkerchief.

" Then,'' said the rabbi, " I pronounce that your name
is cut oif from your nation ; that it is blotted from under
heaven. Thou hast wilfully forsaken God, and would
not hearken to his reproof, and now he hath forsaken
thee } thou art an offence in his sight. I pronounce
thee excommunicated : and every Jew who shall here-
after keep thy company, I pronounce against him the
anathema of Jehovah, our Lawgiver and our King.''

An elder now began to read to her. Leila was terri-
fied— terrified not because she feared any of the anathe-
mas which related to herself mereli/, but because some
of them separated her from her father and all her
relatives. The following is the substance , —

^' Hear thou the curses of the Lord upon all those
who break the commands which he gave to us, his
chosen people ; and against all those who are disobedient
to his law, as promulgated by our lawgivers and prophets.

'^ ^ Thus saith the Lord, if thou wilt not hearken unto
the voice of the Lord thy God, nor to the voice of his
people, to do all the commandments, and tread in all

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 157

the statutes which I have given to thee this day, then
all these curses shall come upon thee and overtake thee.

^' '- Cursed shall be all thy substance.

'^ '■ Cursed shall be thy dwelling-place.

" ' Cursed shall be thy going out and thy coming in.

'' ' Cursed shall be the fruit of thy body.

^^ ' The Lord shall smite thee with drought, and fever,
and consumption. Thine enemies shall reign over thee.
Thy food shall not satisfy.

" ^ All these things, saith the Lord, shall come upon
thee, because of the wickedness of thy doings, whereby
thou hast forsaken me.'

'^ These are the curses of the Lord, even the King of
Israel. That they may be averted and not fall upon
thee, we will offer our earnest prayers.

^'Further, we pronounce our anathema against thy
father, or any of our nation, who shall come near thee,
or have ought to do with thee whatever. To us thou
art as though thou wert never born among us.

"Lastly, we beg of thee, turn and repent. Bewail
thy sins, if it be that thou mayst have pardon for thy
manifold wickedness."

Thus was this affectionate child to be for ever sepa-
rated from her only parent — that parent who was her
very life-spring. The shock was too severe, and she
wept heartily and convulsively.

'■'■ Dost thou repent V^ harshly inquired a rabbi.

'^ Oh, no, no, no ! Do not speak to me; your kind-
ness is cruelty."

A paper was directly set before her to which she was
compelled to affix her signature. In her own artless
manner she says : '' I was full of terror when they
14

158 LEILA ADA,

forced the pen into my hand. I could scarcely guide
it, my hand trembled so much. They told me to write
my name. I do not know how I wrote it ; I suppose it
was legible, for they appeared contented. What it was
I signed I never knew.'^

This done, she was ordered to leave the room. Her
uncle spoke to a rabbi in a low, earnest tone ; the rabbi

immediately said, ^' You are permitted, Miss T , to

remain here three days longer. That time being ex-
pired no Jew may receive you into his house. You
must be prevented all opportunity of preaching your
views among us ; therefore, according to the command
of God, we have cut you off from his people. Do not
reflect upon us ; you have placed yourself in this sorrow-
ful position. Your dear father will be immediately
acquainted with our proceedings ; and I, earnestly hope
that jei your eyes may see the error of your ways."

It was long past midnight when Leila retired ; but it
was not to sleep. Closing the door of her chamber, she
bent her knees in prayer for resignation to the divine
will; and now as, perhaps, the dearest ties of consan-
guinity were severed, that Grod would be her Father, as
he had promised. Then, being determined that she
would not remain at her uncle's house another day, she
arranged for her departure.

And thus was this last effort of her uncle and the
rabbis a signal failure. The cutting-off of every Jew
who forsakes the national faith, is of course nothing
more than a proper fulfilment of Jewish law and usage.
But very confidently was it believed that the idea of
being separated from her father and kindred would ter-
rify Leila into a denial of Christianity. They admitted

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 159

it. They told her father so. Full of this expectation
they came together that afternoon; full of it they began
the efforts of the evening. And yet all their laboriously
prepared arguments had been swept away like chaff
before the whirlwiud, as long as they could agree to
listen. Everything they said was met, and refuted,
with the unshaken firmness and heroic constancy of

deep and solemn conviction. And this by a mere child

a child who had not received a moment's notice of the
ordeal through which she was to pass. They were en-
raged. Amidst their insults she had conducted herself
with a calm and majestic dignity. She had heard the law
read which separated her from her parent and her people.
Yet she did not exhibit the slightest sign of a waver-
ing intention. On the contray she professed her fixed
resolution, even in tbe very extremity of her agony.
They were confounded. They could scarcely believe it.
During this interview Leila was favoured with the
especial blessing of her Heavenly Parent. We have
often heard her declare, that she never felt such power
and quickness of thought, either before or after it. It
was always her conviction that her tongue was directed
and influenced by the Spirit of Grod; for the language
was not her own, and appeared to flow without toil or
effort. Nor was she for a moment at a loss. Doubt-
less this fact, connected with her extreme youthfulness,
had much to do with the disgusting behaviour she ex-
perienced from certain of her irritated opposers. In

the midst of a correspondence with Mr. Isaac T

(her cousin before referred to,) we received in May last,
a letter designed to throw additional light on this view
of the feeling of her questioners, and also to exhibit

160 LEILA ADA,

Leila's constancy and decision in the extreme moment
of her anguish. He thought we might make the in-
formation available for a new edition. Not clearly see-
ing how it could very well be done, we requested, and
obtained permission to publish an extract. And here
it is : —

" I cannot tell when I am to bring this awfully long
letter to a close, for I have now to tell you of two inci-
dents, which to the present moment I had never thought
of as being important for you to know, and which I
think I should not have remembered now, only when
I came to this part of my beloved cousin's memoir, it
struck me that if you had known them you would per-
haps have taken occasion to introduce them. I waited
up that night until the rabbis, &c., came out of the
room. After talking and fasting for so many hours
they seemed both hungry and thirsty, and while zeal-
ously employed in appeasing their appetites they also
found time for some very edifying conversation. Being
in a very ugly temper, I pleaded illness, and did not join
them at the table; but I took notice of all they said,
and a few sentences I still remember. ' Well,' said some-
body, ^ of all the bold and determined opposers of even
fii'st principles of religious truth, I never knew one to
equal her to-night. How glibly her tongue runs when
she gets into that Nazarene doctrine.' ^ Ah !' answered
one of the rabbis, ' I told you you would not find it so
easy to overturn her. You have not had my experi-
ence among the wicked. "When the seductions of that
Nazarene doctrine have laid hold upon the mind of the
young, it is almost impossible to recover them. I
never knew an instance yet. x^h ! the men who propa-

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 161

gate it little think of the curse which clings to them,
and which is yet to take effect. How many hundreds
of our noblest brethren have been sucked down its ac-
cursed vortex I' ' To hear such a girl speak so confi-
dently and bear down everything before her, put me out
of patience/ said another. 'A good beating would
have done her more good than reasoning with her, and
I should like to have given it her.' ' Hush V said fa-
ther. It was just in time to save me from saying some-
thing worse, and so bringing myself into trouble.

^' The other thing might help to show how decided
Leila was to the last. I was conversing with her on
the morning of her departure from our house, and in
the midst of it I took occasion to inquire tenderly how
she had resolved, and if her intentions were of such a
kind that she could allow me the delight of assisting
her in any way. ' Well/ she replied, ' I think, my
dear Isaac, there is nothing now that you can do to
assist me. I do not profess that I have no anxiety.
Indeed, I have much anxiety. But I think I can say,
that my trust is simply in Jesus ; and that if my be-
loved father [here her emotion overcame her and for
some time she was silent] should never speak to me
again, and, even if he should make me no allowance of
money, (this I do not believe,) I shall not hesitate a
moment. Should my present circumstances result in
both these, I shall seek a situation as resident governess
or servant of some kind. And to compensate for my
ignorance, I will be content to have no salary. I have
sufficient clothing to last me a very long while — as long
I think, as in that case I shall want any ; and I have
some money too and that, you know, is a

162 LEILA ADA,

large sum, considering the care with which I shall use
it.' ''

She had determined to leave her uncle's house, and
that at once, but in what a trying strait she was in-
volved. She had been cast out from among her nation,
she had been cut off from her kindred by the rabbis,
but would her father really be guided by their decision ?
The many happy years gone by, the sweet and number-
less proofs of the high place she possessed in his affec-
tions, all seemed to declare loudly that it was impos-
sible. Whatever dislike he felt to her profession of
Christianity, he would never be able to deny her living
with him. She fixed, however, that she would for the
present reside with a Christian family, who, since her
conversion, had been most affectionately intimate with
her. They lived at about two miles from her home.
Their eldest daughter, an exceedingly pious young lady,
had ever since the commencement of her acquaintance
with Leila been her confidential friend and corres-
pondent.

Their meeting was affecting to both. ^^ She threw
herself upon my neck," says Miss H , "exclaim-
ing, ^ They have dared my dear father to permit me to
return home.^ She wept ; and — can it surprise ? — I
rejoiced to weep too."

In about a month from the time of her leaving home,
symptoms of declining health became visible. Her con-
stitution, never strong, had, doubtless, received a severe
shock from the accumulated sorrow and anxiety which
she had undergone, through separation from her father
and her home. Add to this the coercive regimen and
unkindness to which she was subjected in her uncle's

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 163

family. But she had become a comparatively unno-
ticed being ; and she was not of a disposition to com-
plain.

These symptoms increased ; and at the time she
quitted her uncle's family, the decay in her health was
very apparent. " I saw/' continues her friend, " that
she was quite ill; indeed, I thought ver^ ill, although,
she did not appear to be fully aware of it. I observed
it to her. ' Well,' she replied, * I am not well, but I
should be if I were with my father ; it is absence from
him unnerves and depresses me.' "

Having communicated with, her father, she received
a most affectionate answer. Among other things he
expressed intense indignation at her usage; a noble
contempt for the curses of the rabbis ; and desired her
to come home to him directly !

This letter produced a sudden revulsion of her whole
life's current, which for a moment was painfully over-
powering. It filled her again with the most brilliant
hopes. Evidently her father had almost — oh ! might
he not have quite ? — burst asunder the trammels of
rabbinical authority. She was scarcely recovered when
a carriage, with himself in it, drew up to the door. He
had followed the bearer of the letter. How sweet that
moment to both ! But their meeting must be sacred.

And Leila was reinstated in her sweet home — her
father kinder than ever — all her books returned to her
— permission to attend her chapel at any time she
pleased cheerfully accorded. She was happy !

Under the tender lavishment of paternal affection,
her spirits appeared to recover their wonted vigour, and
a fresh glow of health to course through her veins and

164 LEI LA ADA,

suffuse her cheek. But it was only the stimulus of
old and dearly-cherished enjoyments which produced
this effect. She had begun to droop. Her spirit was
ripening for the everlasting joys of heaven. Soft and
peaceful was her decline, for it was soothed by the pres-
ence of her E-edeemer.

The first steps of the insidious disease were more
than usually guileful. And when at length it had as-
sumed its undoubted characteristics, her fond father grew
restless and impatient if ever any reference were made
to it. "A slight cough — and this was so very slight —
was a thing to which she had always been subject : and
the shortness of breath, and the bright hectic flush
upon her cheek, he had noticed before. She would
soon be quite as well as ever she was. However, if it
would please the other members of the family, he would
certainly call in the physician. But he himself was
quite satisfied that his services were not required.''
The physician said that there was no present cause for
serious apprehension, and he tried to bind up the
breaking threads of her life. But all, except her parent,
could see her unworldly thoughtfulness, and her gradu-
ally wasting strength. And then there was a deceitful
change, and Leila again walked in the garden and
tended her flowers. She could even sit down to the
piano and sing some favourite movement — but it was
always soft and solemn. Her father rejoiced, for they
said she would soon be well again. But on Leila's own
heart there rested a sweet assurance, tha.t she was going
to the bosom of her Redeemer.

It was a calm golden evening — one of those lovely
sunsets toward the close of summer when earth and sky

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 165

seem to mingle into one blaze of glory, and all nature is
hushed in profound adoration. In a bower formed of
jessamines and bright roses sat Leila gazing into the
profound depths of the fiery splendours, her heart throb-
bing with impulsive delight. Her thoughts were afar,
and she seemed to have forgotten that any one beside
herself was present. She began slowly and calmly,
and in tones so soft and deep as made it seem an inspi-
ration—

'* I saw no temple therein, for the Lord God Almighty
and the Lamb are the temple of it. The city had no
need of the sun, neither of the moon to shine in it ; for
the glory of God did lighten it, and the Lamb is the
light thereof.^^

And then a soft brightness passed across her face like
a shadow from the wing of an angelic spirit ; and she
continued, '* I am going to behold that glory.''

It was strange. For she seemed to be regaining her
strength, and to be progressing towards health. But
the words fell on the heart of one who sat near her with
all the certainty of a prophesy. Accepted by her father,
he loved Leila, and was beloved in return. And he
looked at her white hands and noticed that they were
getting longer and thinner, and that her skin was becom-
ing more and more clear and transparent. The shadowy
veil of time which hung between her sight and her
Saviour was fast dissolving ; and even now, that thought-
ful eye appeared lit up with an immortal fire. Why
did he not observe all this before ?

That young saint was pasvsing away in the midst of
all the brightness which a promised future of love and
peace could bestow. But she felt no regret for all she

166 LEILA ADA,

was leaving — nothing except an absorbing desire to see
the salvation of her parent and relatives. She knew —
the feeling was an all pervading reality — that she was
going to a better home, where every love and beauty is
enjoyed in perfection and for ever. And she longed to
fly away and be there.

i

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 167

CHAPTER XIII.

EVANISHINGS.

"She pleads,
Witli angel tongue and mild beseeching eye.

Her heart
Rejoiced to die, for happy visions blessed
Her voyage's last days, and hovering round.
Alighted on her soul, giving presage
That heaven was nigh. Oh, what a burst
Of rapture from her lips ! what tears of joy
Her heavenward eye suffused \"

It is a sweet employment to honour the memory of
those once dear to us in this life, but whose face we can
now behold no more. To trace the bright track which
marks their earthly course : to view them in the cham-
ber of death, see their last triumphant smile, and hear
their latest prayer ; and when at last the final victory is
completed, to watch their flight to those realms of bles-
sedness where no sigh can ever breathe, to interrupt the
harmony of the skies, no pain disturb the repose of the
inhabitants.

Thrice hallowed be the memory of the friends who
are dead, thrice hallowed be the fondly cherished image
of departed love. Come to us, ye gentle daughters,
who mourn the loss of a tender father, or a fond, devo-
ted mother ; — come to us, thou heart-stricken husband,
who weepest the loss of a beloved wife; and come, too,
thou inconsolable mother, whose dearest offspring has

168 LEILA ADA,

drooped away in the cold embrace of death ; oh ! come
and join us, and our tears shall mingle in holy affection
for the absent ones, and in spirit we will seek the con-
secrated remembrances in which these beloved objects
repose.

We are not separated eternally. They may not re-
turn to us, but we shall go to them. What consolation
in the thought ! What a holy calm does it diffuse over
the spirit ! What bliss will it be to rejoin them in
^'the better land," full of the joy-inspiring conviction
that we shall part no more !

Even so, beloved spirits ! early have ye left us to be
for ever with the Lord. But we shall follow you into
his blessed home. We will not weep for you as lost.
Your forms are often shadowed to us, and we hear
you singing sweetly in our dreams. Resting with a
firm reliance on the merits of our Redeemer, Jesus, we
know we shall soon awake to rejoin you. Even now
you seem to invite us to share with you the society of
angels, while you breathe in soft whisperings that we
are hastening to you again.

Eternal Father ! Fountain of goodness ! we praise
and adore the love with which thou doest all things.
We cease our dishonourable sorrow : " The Lord gave
and the Lord hath taken away, blessed be the name of
the Lord." '' Praise the Lord, let us praise the Lord,
and speak good of his name." With tender affection we
will recall scenes passed with those who have been
called away — scenes which can return no more. Our
tears, the simple offerings of unaffected love, shall tes-
tify the emotion of our hearts. And, is it even so, that
they who were so dear to us are asleep in the tomb ?

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 169

Yet by them our sighs are not unheard; nor do our
tears fall unheeded.

The illusive hopes of Leila's lengthened stay on earth
wore passing away. During the buoyancy of these
treacherous weeks, she occupied much of her time in
writing. Her heart yearned with a sad and thoughtful
tenderness towards her nation. The guilt they were
contracting, and the happiness they were losing, while
denying their Messiah, lay like an icy weight upon her
soul; and she cherished fervent longings to do some-
thing for them. Most of all was she concerned for her
father and her kindred. And as she felt the film of
life grow thinner and thinner, the deep workings of her
spirit on their behalf became more and more powerful
still. Warm-hearted and thoughtful she had always
been, but there was a strange loveliness and maturity
about her now. Often would she seek her parent, and
with her head resting on his bosom, and her arms
entwining his neck, whisper to him of the unutter-
able joys she felt in the love of Jesus, and the bright
home to which she knew she was going. It pained
him excessively ; for his child seemed all that he pos-
sessed. He had cherished her with all a tender parent's
lavish fondness : and she had repaid his affection by ex-
panding into life very beautifully and with ever-increas-
ing loveliness. He felt it impossible that he could
consent to her passing away. He shuddered to hear
her speak of dying. And while in tones full of deep
paternal feeling he begged her not to say anything
about leaving him, he would answer evasively respecting
his belief in Jesus.

The afternoon had declined into the golden brilliance
15

170 LEILA ADA,

of sunset : and this again was decaying into the soffe
shadows of twilight, Leila had been conversing with
her parent on themes connected with Christianity^ while
her eyes, unnaturally bright with the slow fever that
was burning in her veins, gave a wondrous fire and en-
ergy to all that she was saying.

^* Papa, dear !" and laying her burning hand on his,
she tenderly kissed his pale cheeky " I do loye you
so — oh ! inexpressibly. I think about you a groat deal ;
for you are always in my heart. God is going to take me
to heaven : I wish I could take you with me. But you
will soon follow me. Yes, dear papa, and I will come
to meet you ! Perhaps — perhaps — papa, — Jesus will
allow me to wait by your bedside as you are dying. He
may — and I will kiss you — and comfort you — and —
papa — " Leila's voice wandered dreamily. It was
plain that her thoughts had fled far from earth, and
joined the hymning circles of bright spirits in heaven.

" Leila, my darling child, I cannot hear you talk in
that way — do cease V said her father, in a dry, hard
cadence.

^' 0, papa," said Leila, "it pains me more than I
can express to hear you speak so. Why cannot you be
happy and trusting like me ? Why do you not give
yourself up to Glod, and come to heaven with me ?
Mortality is the lot of man. Nothing is more usual,
nothing more common on earth than separation. I
know it is very severe for you to give me up to die. I
feel immeasurably on this account, and sometimes it
almost tempts me to wish to remain with you ; for it
makes me very sad when I think on what you are suffer-
ing. I used to imagine how dreadful it would be if you

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 171

were to die and leave me behind ; but then, papa, you
know, I was young, and might have thought that, per-
haps, I should live many years. Now, you are sure
you will not be long separated from me. The hour
may indeed be very near when your earthly existence
must close. Excessive grief, while it may displease
God, will render your life wretched, and unfit you to
serve him as he commands you : and it cannot keep me
with you, nor yet recall me when I am dead. Jesus is
sorry to see you so unhappy at losing me, but I am his,
papa ; and he must take me. Don't sorrow any more
for me ; this is one of those things which he left his
Father's house to conquer. He would comfort you and
make you quite happy, if you would allow him. He
waits, he expresses his wish to cheer you graciously in
your affliction, and bring us again to meet in himself at
last, and to share with each other the joys of his king-
dom. Will you not open your heart to him ?* You are
so noble, so loving, so excellent in everything, papa,
that I am sure you are not far from the kingdom of
God. Jesus loves you : do, dear, come to him, pray to
him, and you will soon feel that he loves you.'^

Her father's earnest eye, and tightly pressed lips,
seemed to speak of a mighty effort to subdue emotions
that were passing in his mind. His countenance re-
laxed, and he said, in a mingled but melancholy voice,
*^ If I could only have your simple and realizing confi-
dence in God — it's of no use to think of it — I cannot
be resigned.'^

" Papa,'^ answered Leila, " it grieves me, it makes
me sad — very sad. It is the omnipotence which Jesus
exercises on my behalf, that reconciles me to the thought

172 LEILA ADA,

of leaving you, papa ; and if you would only ask him,
he is ready to give you the same peaceful, happy trust.
Then will a sweet serenity come over your soul, and
you will have an experimental assurance that all he does
is in love. He will always give you what is best for your
temporal peace, and eternal happiness. I have often
found, papa, on examining my heart, when it seemed
to me I had cause to be sorrowful, that the real evil was
my being weakly, perhaps sinfully disposed, and there-
fore I had no just cause to repine. ... 0, my dear
papa, come to Jesus — now, will you ? I am dying. I
shall not be here to talk to you of him much longer ;
let us kneel together before him. He is God — indeed,
indeed he is : I feel it every moment. His Spirit will
sanctify, and bless, and save you, and crown your head
with everlasting joys.''

" Leila, I shall see you again. Pray that I may take
comfort from that thought."

'^ Then, papa, you are a Christian V
" Are there none besides Christians in heaven ?"
" No, sweet papa, none but those who come to G-od
through Jesus, and who love him better than all else,
can be admitted into heaven."

^^ But, my dear, I love God with all my heart, I hope
— at least I try to."

" And he loves you for that, papa. But he cannot
receive you into heaven if you do not also love the Son
whom he hath sent. He cannot pardon you, if you
deny Jesus. It is to Christ that we owe the blessing
of calling Jehovah our Father, and of seeking from his
unutterable love, the blissful recompense for earthly
sorrow in a joyous immortality. Oh, papa, do love

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 173

Jesus and come to heaven. All is so happy in heaven.
All is so peaceful, — loving, — beautiful, in heaven. I
long to be there.'' And Leila spoke in a voice of still
assurance which she often used unconsciously — a voice
as though the veil which separates the present from
eternity, were drawn aside, and her eyes were looking
upon its glory.

There was a solemn silence ; and Leila's father drew
her fragile form still closer to his bosom.

^' Papa/' said Leila, after a while, "you have no con-
fidence in Judaism, I think I may be certain of that.
Have you now ?"

" I have none in its present forms of presenting wor-
ship to Jehovah. We have got wrong somehow."

'^ Well, now ?" said Leila, in a tone which expressed
that she wanted to know what he did confide in.

" God, my dear, is a Being all love and mercy. He
' willeth not the death of a sinner.' And seeing that,
perhaps, none of us have learned his appointed way of
worship, I believe that in the overflowings of his love
and mercy, he will pardon us. I am more charitable,
Leila, than I was when you got me to investigate the
Jewish belief. I think that every pious Jew who clings
to his Bible and that only, and who loves God with all
his heart, and every pious Christian who does likewise,
may thus be saved."

" 0, papa," said Leila, in a voice of deep concern,
'^ I would rather hear you say that you are still as ever,
a strict believer in the religion of our people. This is
really a very dangerous view which you take. It quite
alarms me; for it may lull your soul into a false peace.
God hath said, ' The soul that sinneth it shall die.'
15*

174 LEILA ADA,

What gift can yoa bring to purchase your forfeited life,
papa ? It is impossible to do away with the necessity
of an atonement. God is love. But he would cease to
be God, if he allowed himself to forgive sin, in the
way you have supposed ; for we cannot imagine a per-
fect being who is not inflexibly just. This the Scrip-
tures everywhere assure us God is. Therefore, though
of his love and mercy, he might earnestly desire to
pardon the transgressor, he cannot do so unless there
are some means of satisfying his justice. And, papa,
I don't want you to tell me, for I know that you believe,
you are not able to do this for yourself. But God the
Son has performed the work which you could never
have done. Oh ! dear papa, is he not altogether
lovely ? can you help loving him ? He loved you, and
took upon himself the awful task of satisfying his
Father's justice, therefore his name shall be called
Wonderful, Counsellor, the Mighty God, the Everlast-
ing Father, the Prince of Peace. There is no salva-
tion, no joy on earth, no heaven, except through his
mediation. Oh, papa, if — if I could only hear you say
that you believed this precious truth — '^

That loving voice was silent. Leila, wearied and
oppressed, leaned on her father's bosom, like a tired
dove nestling in the parent's breast. The deep cloud-
shadows enshrouded the apartment with a solemn hue.

Leila's appeal sunk into the depths of her father's
heart. He spoke of it after she was dead. He saw
no more the bright imploring eyes, but the yearning
voice still sounded in his soul like a spirit-echo, — '^ The
soul that sinneth, it shall die." That he was a sinner
he knew ; and with a vividness which made him shud-

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 175

dePj he saw himself a naked spirit standing before a
just and holy God. He had no conviction of his favour,
such as his beloved child possessed. He acknowledged
to himself, that though he strove to love him he could
find little comfort in his service. And then he thought
of the seraphic happiness and love which his daughter
enjoyed, and from his heart gushed a passionate wish
that in everything he could be like her.

A conflict of passion followed. '' God is just," he
thought. ^' The soul that sinneth it shall die.'' Be-
tween this sentence and salvation he saw an awful gulf
fixed. How was it to be passed ? He did not look to
Jesus, for then it would have vanished. " She is
right," he again thought, ^' I feel she must be right.
Can all this beautiful faith and this yearning love be a
fiction — an empty imagination ? Can this deep, pro-
phetic certainty of immortal happiness be after all a
bubble? It is impossible that anything so lasting and
equal should not depend on some source more powerful
than the excitement of mere human feeling Such an
influence could never result from a foolish belief in the
divine power of a mere man. But how is the truth to
be found out ? Who can be sure of anything, where
everything is so uncertain? He was lost in a wilder-
ness of conjecture and unbelief, and consequent un-
happiness.

'' Papa !" said Leila in a tremulous voice, and she
began to weep : " kiss me, dear."

" Never mind, Leila. Don't distress yourself. I
am not worth half so much anxiety as I cause you. I
am sorry you think of me so much. Think less about
me : it will all be right at last."

176 LEILA ADA,

'' But, papa, you are not a Christian. 0, papa, think
• — suppose now — suppose — '^ for a moment her emotion
overpowered her — " suppose you should die not being a
Christian. 0 ! it is dreadful to think of ! The thought,
papa, that there is indeed a possibility that I am about
to leave you for ever, is too horrible for me to bear."

''Well, my dear, we shall see. I will talk to you
another time : I fear the effect of this excitement upon
you. Do allow yourself to repose."

" Papa, I shall be with you only a little time longer.
I want to talk to you about Jesus. No excitement
hurts me so much as your present state ; and all this
afternoon you have been so wishful to listen to me. It
is indeed very kind of you, dear papa : and I thank
you. But there is one thing which you always excuse
me from doing — I mean, reading to you from his word.
Do be willing I should read the New Testament now."

" I will gladly hear you read anything you desire.
But I had rather you would wait for some other oppor-
tunity. You are very tired. Be quiet now. You shall
read to me, my love, to-morrow."

"Indeed, I am not too tired to read of the precious
love of our Redeemer, my dearest father," answered
Leila, with so high, so sublime an expression of joy
upon Iier countenance as could never be depicted in lan-
guage. And she proceeded to open her Bible : it was
ever at hand.

With the fineness of soul and tender sensibility of an
ardent lover of the pure and beautiful, and a quick
poetic fancy, she was one of the most touching readers
of Scripture whom we ever heard. Her faith so vividly
apprehended whatever she was reading, that it seemed to

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 177

become a reality; and this, joined to her sweet pathos
and her tenderness of feeling, gave a strange influence
and attractiveness to her diction. And beside this, the
nearness to eternity, which now was her always present
feeling, surrounded every thing she said and did with an
ever-increasing loveliness. She read first the 53 d of
Isaiah. Then turning to the Gospel by St. John she
read the 14th, 15th, as far as the 16th verse, and the
17th. These finished, she turned to the account of the
Redeemer's wondrous love and agony as recorded by St.
Luke. She opened the 22d chapter, read first the 37th
verse, then from the 39th verse to the end; and on to
the 48th verse of chapter 23d. It was a hallowed exer-
cise. According to the condition of her emotion, she
addressed comments, &c., to her father, who sat evidently
deeply affected. He was very uneasy; constantly shaded
his eyes with his hand ; and strove earnestly to wrestle
down whatever it was he felt.

" 0 my dear, dear papa,'' said Leila, earnestly, and
with swimming eyes, as soon as she had finished, '^can
you now resist such infinite love as Jesus has displayed
any longer ?"

Her father made no reply.

^' Papa, do believe me, there is no happiness so great^
so pure as that which flows from an experimental ac-
quaintance with the love of Christ. Will you pray to
him — now, papa?"

"What's the use, my beloved child, if I can't believe
upon him ?"

" Well, sweet papa, kneel with me ; and we will pray
to him till he gives you faith. He will hear you and
answer you, if you can only address to him the language,

178 LEILA ADA,

* Lord, I believe ; help thon my unbelief/ 0 ! he is so
good — so lovely. Will you, papa?" and taking his
hand, she tenderly kissed him.

" Speak to me another time, Leila, Don't say any
more now." And he seated himself before the piano —
a very useless mode of trying to drown the voice of an
awakened conscience.

With a silent prayer that God would deepen the

impression evidently made, Leila listened to him as he

played one of her favourite pieces,

" There's a land where those who loved when here,
Shall meet to love again." — Song of the Troubadour.

As Leila's father has been so often brought before
our readers, and will be yet again, we are inclined to
suppose they would like a brief introduction to him.

Imagine a dignified, delicate-looking man, in appear-
ance of about fifty years of age, with a high clear fore-
head, pensive eyes, and hair which time has here and
there lightly streaked with silvery gray. His features
are exceedingly mild and prepossessing; it is scarcely
possible for the dullest and most careless to look upon
them without an emotion of pleasure, for they seem at
once to gain our confidence that he has a kind and
feeling heart. All his movements partake of the calm-
ness and peace which reign everywhere within his
bosom.

He was one of a family of three — two brothers and a
sister. His sister and he, being very similar in taste,
disposition, &c., became much more deeply attached
than is at all usual, even in such a relation ; but before
she had attained eighteen years of age his fondly
cherished companion was separated from him by death.

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 179

ThiS; added to the complete mental unlikeness between
himself and his brother, greatly contributed to form that
disposition to tender pensiveness which ever after was a
distinguishing feature in his character.

From his mother he had inherited a delicate consti-
tution, and a certain fineness of nature, which seemed
rather to belong to the softer organization of woman,
than the usual coarseness of man. His intellectual
capacities were of a superior order, his taste refined, and
there was always about him a yearning after the ideal,
which resulted as it commonly does, in a supreme
dislike for all the matter-of-fact occupations of life. In
business, he thought he never could, and, as it was not
necessary, he never did engage.

Nothing could be more opposite than his brother.
Masculine and energetic, there was an aspect of rocky
decision in everything he said and did. Yet he was
kind, even tender ; but inexorable in what he thought a
duty, there was a sort of grimness, an unmistakable
want of right feeling in many of his results. A power-
ful thinker within certain limits, he was just fitted to be
what we have seen him, stern and unbending in his
religious opinions. He had been taught that Judaism
was right ; he had no doubt that it was right ; indeed
he felt it must be ; and that was enough.

When about twenty-five years of age, Leila's father
married from among his own people a lady two years
his junior. This lady was a woman of great purity and
sweetness of character; " a very, very woman," says he,
who was best qualified to judge — her husband. As the
marriage contract was in both based upon the highest
esteem and deepest affection, he entered into its spirit

180 LEILA ADA,

with all tlie ardour of his sensitive nature, and their
home was the centre of " far more than the ordinary
amount of conjugal happiness." And when in three
years after their union his wife became the mother of a
lovely daughter, it seemed as if their domestic joys
could not possibly be increased.

But these structures so fair and beautiful seldom last.
They are too bright, too spiritual to exist amidst these
cold and stormy scenes of earth. In two years from the
birth of his daughter, he was called to the bed-side of
the wife of his bosom, to receive her last embrace, hear
her last sigh, and then to find her gone for ever !* Alas,
poor heart-stricken, consoled by no bright certainty
of a meeting in the '' better land," for his religion gave
but fragile hope that he should see her again hereafter.
To be sure he felt a sort of hope, but it brought little
comfort. There was no undisturbed confidence, no
sweet assurance, such as the Christian possesses :
nothing but an indistinct and shadowy trust that the
divine mercy would be extended to him, although he
knew not why.

* Leila had great hope in her mother's death. We know this
from some beautiful reflections among her papers : we have also
heard her express it in her conversation. A woman of sound un-
derstanding, and great strength of mind, the Bible was her constant
study and delight. From the prophecies of Jacob, Moses, David,
and Isaiah, she moulded her belief in the Messiah whom she ex-
pected— a belief so exactly agreeing with the office of the real Mes-
siah, that had she read the New Testament, she would doubtless
have become a Christian. The only diflferenee which existed be-
tween her religion and Christianity was simply that she still con-
tinued to look forioard for the establishment of the new covenant;
while we as Christians of course believe that it has already beea
established in the person of Jesus of Nazareth.

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 181

0 hard religion ! Unlike — liow unlike — that gener-
ous, loving trust which the Lord of Glory delights to
receive from his creatures — that blessed relationship
into which he waits to enter with all those who believe
upon him, as he has revealed himself in his written
word. Sons of Abraham ! Our friends and brethren !
Our hearts yearn toward you, our spirits are troubled
for you, when we reflect upon the doubtings, the chill-
ing misgivings, the substantial unhappiness, which your
religion must always entail upon you. Will you not
bring your worn and anguished souls to Jesus, that he
may fill them with everlasting peace and joy, out of
the riches of his self-denying, suffering love? Raise
your weeping eyes to the Man of sorrows, in whose
loving breast is borne the grief and sadness of a
world.

A deep melancholy now settled around Mr. T. He
saw nothing, felt nothing, cared for nothing: He
wished that himself and his infant might die. But as the
fair and flowerlike nature of his daughter began to ex-
pand itself, and put forth its buds so full of loveliness
and promise, he felt once more aT^akened to tenderness.
He had called her Leila Ada — her mother's name — and
as she began to unfold herself in her mother's image,
and to exhibit all the fanciful graces and sweet beauty
of childhood, she imperceptibly filled up the great chasm
which had been made in his heart. Sometimes past
things would present themselves vividly before him,
and fill his soul with sadness ; but he ever found the
company of his child an effective diversion. Hours on
hours would he amuse himself in pelting her with
flowers among the garden walks, and twinmg wreaths
16

182 LEILAADA;

of rose and jessamine in her hair ; or sometimes he
guided her fragile fingers along the keys of the piano,
and taught her to jDlay and sing some simple piece
■which, in long gone times, he had so loved to hear per-
formed by her mother. Rich was the solace of these
chosen moments. Perhaps the bereaved parent whose
eye is now bent upon this page, can feel how sweet
their blessing — they seemed to bring him near to Aer,
his loved one, called away.

Leila grew up with exceeding sweetness ; and soon
her earnest and loving nature threw out its tendrils and
completely entwined itself around her parent. Leila
thought only of him ; he was her world ; and she was
constantly engaged in devising new plans to increase
his pleasures.

Never perhaps were the parental and filial relations
more afiectionately sustained than between Leila and
her father. All his interests, all his hopes, all his joys,
had unconsciously entwined themselves with those of
his child. For her he lived ; with reference to her
benefit he had always managed his property ; to advance
her happiness, in the largest possible degree, was the
height of his ambition, and the expected result of all
his plans.

But we think we hear our young reader whisper,
^' Ah, then, why did he so obstinately persist in send-
ing her away, when she became a Christian V We are
obliged to own, that in this matter he was painfully at
fault. It was an act which, at the time, he felt to be a
terrible sacrifice ; and which afterwards cost him many
repentant tears. Yet we must remind our readers that
though his commands respecting Leila wore certainly

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 183

unkind, and greatly to be wondered at, yet he had no
idea that she was subjected to neglect and insult, in ad-
dition to these. When he knew this, there was a sort
of grandeur in the turn his conduct took, and the in-
dignation he expressed. He immediately avowed to the
parties concerned, that in the insults which Leila had
endured, he felt himself to be more deeply dishonoured
than the child ; and afterwards, when they had offered the
best explanation they could give, he warmly, and in a
tone of bitter sarcasm, expressed a wish that they
would pronounce the same anathema against himself,
for he would never enter a synagogue, nor have a Jew
(excepting his own family) in his house again.

Then let it be also remembered that Mr. T. was at
heart a Jew. Though he could not at all prevail upon
himself to believe in the use of a great many of the
observances appointed by the Judaic ritual, his spirit
was essentially Jewish. He saw that the national reli-
gion was surrounded by great inconsistencies, and that,
to a thoughtful mind, there were difficulties connected
with it which seemed almost insurmountable; but after
all, he believed it was the right one, and that there was
no other by which men could be saved. Therefore, to
use his own language, '' The thought of my daughter's
forsaking it, filled me, from my very love for her, with
a perfect horror.^'

And now he saw his cherished offspring, in whose
life his own was bound up, gradually pining away. It
made him feverish, restless, even peevish. There was
a deep thoughtfulness too about him ; for he saw his
child's happiness and love, and felt no doubt that she
was going to eternal bliss. Sometimes he found it im-

184 LEILA ADA,

possible to resist the soothing influences of her unruffled
serenity and peace ; and then a deep calmness was spread
over him, hushing his tumultuous spirit into sweet re-
pose. Not that he was any more resigned to give Leila
up to die — that he never could be — it was a strange
comfort that insensibly filled up his heart.

5k Siz. ik jk 5?x ^

Her strength was fading away — slowly and beauti-
fully as the last lingering flowers droop amidst the soft-
ened breathings of autumn. There could no longer be
any doubt of the result : hope forsook all — even her
father. Sometimes she could almost indulge a wish to
live, that if possible she might do something to bless
her nation, and make them feel rightly ; for their mel-
ancholy condition had sunk into the depths of her
earnest heart. She laboured with her pen in their be-
half, up to the latest moment that her strength would
permit. She sent long, and fervent, and afl"ectionate
letters to all her near relatives — writing out, and ad-
dressing a separate one to each member of their respec-
tive families. Some of these pure breathings of a soul
already very nearly passed within the veil of eternity,
we have now upon our table. One of them (it is nearly
the last letter which she ever wrote), we cannot read
without being touched even more deeply than by any
of the others. The language is exquisitely beautiful.
It is the earnest expression of a soul all love, conscious
that it was soon to pass away into its immortal rest.
On the day upon which the closing passages were added
to it, she seemed very capable of the efTort of writing,
and therefore she continued it much longer than was at
all usual with her now. At last, quite tired, she re-

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 185

clined herself upon the sofa. She had given her whole
heart to what she had been writing, and the enthusiasm
of her spirit had kindled her countenance, till it was
radiant with feeling, and her eyes glistened bright
through her tears. '

^'I am writing to cousin Mary,^^ she said to a friend
who was present, ^' I have most sanguine hope of that
dear girl. She is generally impressed in favour of the
Christian religion ; indeed, I am inclined to suppose
that she quite believes that Jesus is the Holy One of
God; yet she does not decide. Her resolution is, I
think, much weaker than her judgment. I have urged
her as well as I am able. It overcomes me to think
that this will probably be the last letter I shall ever
write to her. Come and see what I have said ; and
help me to persuade her.'^

The letter was finished ; she laid down her pen from
directing it, and then, clasping her hands, said : —

'^0, my poor suffering people! They weigh so
heavily on my heart. I love them. Could I only make
them understand the love and peace which the servant
of Jesus feels, they would come to Christ — I am sure
of it. It is dreadful to think how they harden their
hearts against him. If I had lived, I was resolved to
devote everything I had, to trying to do them good. My
Saviour can do without me ; and so he takes me away.
But you will continue to love them for me, will you
not ?'' she added with a sweet simplicity.

A domestic was called. '' Grace dear," said Leila,
^' let me depend upon you to see that this letter is posted
in good time ; may I V
16*

186 LEILA ADA,

She had left the room. "That sweet girl is a
Christian V said Leila, her pure face radiant with
delight.

*^ A Jewess by birth, is she not ?''

•'* Yes : I am so thankful. I was conversing with her
two days ago, and she told me that she loved the Lord
Jesus with all her heart ; and that she was always pray-
ing to him for more strength and peace; and also that
if she died at any moment she was sure he would receive
her soul. May the Lord Jehovah preserve her, and
give her the strength for which she prays,'' continued
Leila with deep feeling. And for a few moments she
was silent, and leaned her head in her hand. She was
doubtless engaged in prayer.

*' The dear creature was willing to be baptized if I
had lived, she said. Should she do so, her parents, and
brothers, and sisters would see her face no more. She
has been rather seriously seized with paralysis once ; and
she always thinks she will be a second time. I spoke
to papa about her ; and he told me that as long as he
lives, she shall have a home with him, and that in the
event of his dying, he will do something to keep her in
comfort. I gladly told her this j and, if she would
come now, while I have strength enough, I offered to
arrange for her baptism, and accompany her myself : but
she shrinks from the consequences which may happen
to her. 0 ! that Jesus may help her to burst the diffi-
culties, and put her unwavering trust in him.''

Leila closed her desk, and went to repose on the
lounge. It was by a window, from which she could look
down upon the long garden. The summer was declining
now : but the flowers of the season were still blooming

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 187

in all their gorgeous beauty. Leila bent her eyes
upon the lovely scene. An enthusiastic admirer of
the beautiful and good she had always been, but she
looked now with the thoughtful, understanding gaze of
a soul which felt the first impulsive throbbings of its
immortality.

'' Immortality is dawning upon me," she said, smiling
brightly. " Grod is going to take me to that home for
which I have long panted. I am happy — very, very
happy. It is, indeed, sweet to die when we know that
we are accepted and loved by Jesus. I often meditate
on that beautiful and majestic truth, ' God is love,^ till
I seem almost to realize the employments of the spirits
in celestial bliss. Do you not find it a precious happi-
ness, to think that we are to be the inhabitants of a
world in which there is nothing — oh ! nothing but Love ?
I shall soon be in that sweet place for ever and ever.
My Redeemer assures me every moment that he loves
me, that I am altogether his, and that he is going to
take me to himself."

" You are so peaceful and happy, and have so much
of holy joy, that it makes us feel quite in love with
dying if we might feel like you."

She smiled sweetly. ''It is Jesus makes me happy.
He is present with me as he promised to be. He fills
me with love ', I have no sort of doubt or fear, and he
will soon come for you too. Oh ! you love him and
that is a great joy to me. Try to love him more, much
more. Be patient a very little longer. Oh ! how
immense is the rapidity with which time flies. Heaven
is very near — constantly look for it. Always aspire
after enlarged holiness. Constantly struggle to be

188 LEILA ADA,

great in the knowledge of God. Sit perfectly loose to
earthly things. Then you will be always ready. It
may not be long before the messenger will come to re-
lease you.''

I asked, "Do you ever feel any shrinking at the
thought of dying ? Though to ask such a question is
very formal after what you have so often said; for I am
almost sure you never do."

" I have no care aibout it/' she replied, " I never
think of it except as a joyful event, which will loose my
soul from earthly bonds. Often, when I contemplate
the certainty of its near approach I feel — oh ! enraptured
— beyond what language can express.

" Continue to visit papa often. He is very nearly
decided to be a Christian. Neither forget dear Grace.
Impress upon her the necessity of avowing Christ before
every one. You know," she added, in an easy, cheerful
voice, " our commands are to preach the Gospel to the
Jew first. You have a fine opportunity here.

" How earnestly the Jews are looking for the coming
of the Messiah. They sink into my heart. Poor, dear
people, almost exhausted with longing expectation,
heaven is offering them happiness, but they refuse to
accept it ... In order to the success of all Christian
efforts made among us, it is quite necessary that there
be a considerable share of the heavenly essence, love,
mixed with the argument; and the more there is of it,
the more probable it is that the end contemplated will
be attained. A Jew cannot often be gained by a mere
cold controversy. Perhaps this is a strange kind of fact
■ — but it is one, nevertheless. Nothing is so effectual
with us as Christian solicitude and love.

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 189

" "When I was at uncle's I prevailed upon cousin Isaac
to take me one sabbath-day to a Christian place of wor-
ship. I knew that in heart he was then a disciple of
Jesus. Gray and mirthful as is his disposition, I didn't
think he intended when he got there, to advertise him-
self as a Jew. He drew forth his Hebrew Bible, laid a
part of the synagogue service conspicuously on the ledge
before us, and refused to accept a side of my hymn-
book. Some excellent friend noticed it, and conveyed
the information to the minister. After the service he
came to us, and kindly inquired if we would oblige him
by a little conversation in the vestry. This was just
what Isaac wanted; and we went. You can easily sup-
pose what the minister's object was. He had not said
much before we observed his impression that in myself
he was addressing a disaffected Jewess, in cousin a per-
verse Jew. He said a few very affectionate words to
me, and then he turned all his force upon Isaac, who
had already desired me to say nothing which would pre-
vent things from taking their course, for he wanted the
ar.o-ument. An exceedingly valuable discussion fol-
lowed ; one which did us both much good. Yet I
thought, there was a sad omission. There was so very
little of that winning tenderness which always excites
high and noble sympathy. The kind minister seemed
almost as quiet and unimpassioned as though he were
about to demonstrate a problem of Euclid. Very little
of a melting or subduing character was expressed.
Instead of using solvents to the rock, he took up the

hammer to crush it in pieces The Jewish heart

is very peculiar soil, and needs therefore peculiar treat-
ment, if it is to be productive of good fruit. "

190 LEILA ADA,

How dignified, how exalted is the Christianj even in
this world. His eyes fixed on immortality, he seems,
like Enoch, to walk with God, and calmly smiles at all
the shocks of time. But never does religion appear
with such dazzling majesty as in the closing hours of
the Christian's life. Then its glorious beauty is indeed
sublime,

The moments, the hours were flying quickly away.
A sad and solemn stillness reigned everywhere within
the house, and mute sorrow was depicted on every
countenance ; for Leila was declining rapidly. Her
cheek daily became brighter : seldom and more seldom
was her light step heard among the rooms, and oftener
was she found reposing on the sofa with her Bible open
before her — her thin fingers separating the leaves. Or
sometimes she would for a long time lie with her head
resting on her hand, her eyes looking into the cerulean
skies. But her thoughts were not among them : they
had taken wing far above the earthly prison-house, and
were wandering on the peaceful shores of the paradise
of God. Happy smiles passed across her face like a
sunbeam glancing amidst summer leaves : and some-
times on that countenance there rested an expression so
unearthly, as to make it seem like the beamings of im-
mortal lifjht.

0 death ! where is thy sting ? 0 grave ! where is
thy victory ? Leila's fading away was calm and very
beautiful. If this were death, why was he ever dreaded
by the child of God? Leila rejoiced to see him. She
smiled on him lovingly, and hailed him as a friend for
whose coming she had long yearned. Nor was it death.

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 191

It was merely '^ the shadow of death.'' The substance
had been endured for Leila by her Saviour. She knew
it, and her soul blessed him for the victory.

It was a mild, golden afternoon. She was getting
very near the immortal rest now, and was reclining,
with her little Bible open in her hand at the closing
chapters of the Revelations.

^' I never before felt the wondrous sublimity of this
imagery and language as I have this afternoon," and
she read in a slow and gentle tone : —

" And he showed me a pure river of water of life,
clear as crystal, proceeding out of the throne of God and
of the Lamb. In the midst of the street of it, and on
either side of the river, was there the tree of life, which
bare twelve manner of fruits, and yielded her fruit every
month; and the leaves of the tree were for the healing
of the nations. And there shall be no more curse : but
the throne of God and of the Lamb shall be in it ; and his
servants shall serve him. And they shall see his face,
and his name shall be in their foreheads. And there
shall be no night there ; and they need no candle,
neither light of the sun; for the Lord God giveth
them light; and they shall reign for ever and ever.
And he said unto me. These sayings are faithful and
true; and the Lord God of the holy prophets sent
his angel to show unto his servants the things which
must shortly be done. Behold I come quickly ; blessed
is he that keepeth the sayings of the prophecy of this
book."

She stopped, and seemed absorbed in her own
thoughts. She was going to that glory — she stood on

192 LEILA ADA,

its verge. " Oh, what a glorious hope is ours !" she
said to her friend who was present. " Come, let us
pray once more together. 0, for immortal powers to
exalt the name of Jesus I" And Leila prayed. It was
a moment which seemed to bring heaven very near to
earth.

I

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 193

CHAPTER XIV.

" WE ALL DO FADE AS A LEAF."

" The path of the just is as the shining light, which shineth more
and more unto the perfect day." — Prov. iv. 1 8.

Our readers will expect a detailed account of Leila^s
illness and dying Lours. We have already adverted to
the close union which subsisted between her and Miss
H . At Leila's request this young lady went to re-
side with her during the whole of her illness. It was
a beautiful companionship : and was to both an abundant
source of the purest enjoyment. Nor were they sep-
arated long. For in a few months after Leila's death
her lovely friend joined her in the praises of the skies.

As Miss H was constantly with Leila, we thought

an account written by her would be much more lucid
and acceptable than a fragmentary one by ourselves.
She readily acceded to the desire we expressed ; and by
the aid of the copious entries which she had made in
her journal, furnished us with the following touching
portraiture of the closing weeks of Leila's life.

^' For some weeks previous to the death of my dear

friend, the late Miss T , her piety assumed a rich

maturity and mellowness. She was evidently ripening
for glory. All her reflections were made subservient
to her spiritual prosperity ; and to all eternity I shall
have reason to bless God, that it was my privilege to
listen to her deeply pious and sensible remarks.
17

194 LEILA ADA,

" One evening we were seated beneath the shadow mI
a large chestnut tree, which grew upon the lawn, in
the midst of a very interesting conversation she re-
marked, ' I have often sat upon this seat and watched
the long shadows of evening quietly descending upon
the trees, and fields, and flowers. And as the shades
have deepened in the blue air, I have watched the beau-
tiful stars, as one by one they pushed aside their veils.
This I have continued, until dewy night has completely
spread her rich mantle, in imagination looking as
though it were thickly studded with intense but soft
brilliants, diamonds, and pearls, and gold. At such
seasons the profound beauty and the solemn stillness
have found their way to my inmost soul, and my spirit,
surrounded as it was by a darkness greater than that of
night, yearned for the food by which alone it could be
sustained. But since the glorious beams of the Sun of
Righteousness have vivified my soul, what happiness
have I here experienced ! Then, when I could view
the starry hosts as the creation of mi/ Father^s hand —
when I thought on their amazing distances, and veloci-
ties, and their numbers, which not even the first arch-
angel can count — when I reflected on the love of their
Creator, my Saviour, so great that he could lay aside
his majesty and his grandeur, and sufier for me the
cruel death of the cross — then, I have felt sublimely
happy. These, my dear Emily, have been very deli-
cious seasons of my existence.' She mused for a few
moments : ' Look, my dear, at yonder sun. This morn-
ing he arose dim and murky, surrounded by a thick
gloom ; yet see how brilliantly, how calmly, how ma-
jestically he sinks to his repose. 0, that this may be the

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 195

happy emblem of my course ! It began amid mists, and
tears, and doubts, and apprehensions. I shall die soon
— I know I shall — and 0, that like him, I may go to
my rest, peaceful, tranquil, without a cloud !"

*' I said, ' You have no fear to die ; neither any anxiety
to live.' ^ No, no,' she repeated, ^I have no fear of death-
it is all removed. I have long accustomed my mind to be
familiar with that certain, solemn event, which will open
to me the gate of heaven. These are by no means
gloomy thoughts. There have been seasons when my
soul has soared far beyond all sublunary things, and
held free converse with its Maker. All earthly thoughts
were intrusive on the aspirations of my spirit. I bless
God for the measure I liave felt and do feel, of holy
peace and joy. There is but one desire in life that I
have : it is that I may witness the conversion of my
dear father. I should then die without having a single
regret to leave behind me.' She then, with an earnest-
ness and simplicity peculiarly her own, prayed, * 0 my
Jesus, do of thine abundant mercy irresistibly affect my
father's heart ; do save him. I have besought thee for
him, and I can rely upon thy promise to hear my prayer.
If it be thy gracious will, answer me speedily \ but I
will abide thy time with patience. 0, my dear Emily,'
she continued, embracing me, '• this always makes me
happy ) I have an unshaken confidence that God will
save my dear father I'

'^ I cannot recollect all she said ; but this will assist
to show the general tenor of her mind. Never before
did I feel half so much of the loveliness of religion as
during my association with this young, yet mature saint.
Never, until I witnessed it in her life and conduct, did

196 LEILA ADA,

I see half its blessed efficacy in purifying the feelings,
exalting the motives, and sanctifying the affections.
She was a pattern of love, meekness, gentleness, good-
ness, and faith. When I reflected on the vastly in-
creased opportunities of serving God which I had had
in comparison with her, I was powerfully convinced of
my stunted growth as a Christian : I was humbled and
abased.

" The united skill of several physicians was inade-
quate to the preservation of her life. Her strength
gradually decreased. The last public work and labour
of love in which she engaged was to visit her ' dear old
woman.' I rode in the landau with her. It was a
memorable afternoon. I never felt so in love with
death as at that season. A hallowed influence pervaded
both our spirits; a solemn, holy awe, such as is seldom
experienced in time, as with tearful eyes, and faltering
accents, she commended each to God. She prayed
with a fervour and a solemnity of feeling as though she
knew it would be the last time they should meet on
earth : and so it proved. Oh ! the loveliness of reli-
gion! God be praised for a holier, a happier, an ever-
lasting life — a life in which friends separated by death
shall see and enjoy each other, for ever and ever.

" As we were returning home, she said to me, ^ I am
very weak now. I think, Emily, that perhaps this
afternoon's work may have been rather too much for
me. But God has given me strength to fulfil it, and I
am thankful. I should like to die working for him who
has done so much for me; but I think that my work
on earth is almost finished. Oh, my dear Emily, I am
very happy ! I have an inward peace and joy which is

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 197

unspeakable; it is full of glory. Jesus is precious;
he is heaven ; I shall soon be with him ; he blesses me
every moment ; Oh, his boundless love to me V

'' Afterwards, she said, ' I have been thinking of my
dear father a great deal ; I am sure that God is power-
fully working upon his heart. He often converses with
me upon my religion, and upon Jesus ; and I can
plainly perceive that his prejudices have given way, and
that he is inclined to regard the Christian religion as
the true religion after all. 0, that God may continue
this delightful work till the glories of Heaven shall
crown what grace hath begun.'

" One very fine afternoon, a short time before she
was almost completely confined to her room, she said to
me, ^ Come with me for one walk around the lawn : it
will be the last we shall ever have together,' I ac-
quiesced immediately, and we proceeded ; she leaning
upon my arm for support. It was deeply affecting to
see her stoop to touch the flowers which her own hand
had so delighted to culture ; to see her look upon the
trees, and fields, and the sweet river, while a deep con-
viction occupied her mind that she was looking and
admiring for the last time. As we were slowly return-
ing she several times stopped to throw a lingering look
upon those lovely scenes which she had so often beheld
with rapture. On ascending the steps of her residence,
she exclaimed, ' Emily^ I shall ascend these steps no
more !'

^' Thus calmly and tranquilly did she look upon the

certain approach of death. No doubts nor harassing

apprehensions afflicted her; in her own language, ^All

is well with me. For me to live in Christy and to die

17^

198 LEILA ADA,

is gain. I have a desire to depart and be with Christ,
which is far better than to live/

" On a morning not long before her death, she said,

* This is my birthday. I am twenty years of age to-
day ; and, in some measure on this account, I should
very much wish both your sisters to come here this
afternoon. Will you make this request known both to
them and papa ?' I at once promised. In the after-
noon she remarked, 'I think I have quite strength
enough to sit up with you, and I should like to look
upon the fields and flowers once more.' Being placed
as she desired, she smiled upon her attendant, saying,

* Thank you ; your kindness in bearing with my fancies,
is very great.' After looking awhile, she said, ' What
a beautiful world ! but beautiful as it is, it bears no com-
parison with that to which I am going. There are
amaranthine bowers and crystal streams, and ever-ver-
dant fields, and ambrosial fruits ; but, above all, there
I shall eternally be in the visible presence of my gra-
cious Kedeemer, and there I shall be able to love and
serve him perfectly. That is my enrapturing thought.
O, the joys of immortality ! I rejoice in my immor-
tality; I am going to live with my Redeemer, and with
the saints in light.' She mused, ' 0, my dear father,
if I could only rejoice in your salvation before I am
summoned from earth -, but I am enabled to give yoo
up into the hands of God. He has always been faith-
ful to his promises : this I have ever proved — and never
more than at the present moment. Blessing and praise
to his holy name !'

" We were all seated round her, and at times she
maintained an animated conversation, though painfully

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 199

interrupted by difficulty of breathing, &c. ' Come
sing with me V she exclaimed, ^ and sing that beautiful
hymn — ^

" Come, let us join our friends above,
That have obtained the prize.' "

" We immediately complied. A deep feeling of the
solemnity of our position — our dear friend and sister
with us now, but just escaping to bliss, already breath-
ing the atmosphere of heaven — and the additional effect
which this gave to the impressively beautiful words we
were singing, filled our eyes with tears. Leila sat in
silent delight. A heavenly smile illumined her coun-
tenance, indicating that she was drinking of the river,
the streams whereof make glad the city of God. In
the midst of the exercise tears chased each other down
her cheek. We inquired the cause. ' Oh !' she ex-
claimed, ^1 thought, if your earthly notes were so
beautiful, what must be the impression created by the
songs of the redeemed in heaven ', and I was so affected
that I could not help weeping with excessive joy. The
words too are so beautiful — but, 0, how inadequately
does such solemn language impress us. Do think less
of this world, and more of eternity than you ever did.
When, like me, you come to die, then will you practi-
cally feel what vanity of vanities is everything earthly.
0, how happy — how veri/ happy— I am ! It is all over.
Death ! oh, death ! where is thy sting ? I am victorious
through my Lord Jesus Christ !'

^' When we had finished the last verse of the hymn,
she remained for a few moments in silent thought as
though revolving its sublime exclamations of triumph

200 LEILA ADA,

in her mind. She then said, ' What beauty ! what gran-
deur ! and I can use it as my own language. I know
whom T have believed. Glory be to my Saviour ! He
is with me now ; and, though my flesh and my heart
fail, yet he is the strength of my heart, and my portion
for ever.' "

'' Although, sometimes, she suffered severe pain, yet
not one look of peevishness, even for a moment, sat
upon her countenance ; nor did a word of murmuring,
or fretfulness, ever escape her lips. Tears of gratitude
would fill her eyes, and she would exclaim, ' Thank
you, thank you; you are very kind!' at the very
slightest marks of regard or attention manifested either
by her friends or attendants. Hers was a lovely Chris-
tianity ! My petition is, that her mantle may descend
upon me.

^' The closing scene drew on apace; for, it was evi-
dent to all that she must soon die; indeed, she knew
it herself; and, therefore, she began to give final direc-
tions respecting the disposal of certain matters. This
was three days before her death. After sending some
substantial mementoes of her love and regard to those
families on her visiting list, she turned her attention to
her family and personal friends. Having expressed
most of her desires concerning these, she requested that
her writing-desk might be placed near her. It was
done. Unlocking it, she took out of it a number of
elegant Bibles. ' Precious books !' she exclaimed, as
she clasped them to her throbbing bosom. ' 0, precious
books ! would I had read you more !' Presenting one
to her maternal aunt, who was present, she said, ' Do
accept this token of my love for you^ and this letter,

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 201

which some time ago T wrote for you ; and, as you read
it, may the Spirit of God lead your heart to those bliss-
ful fountains of repose which have made me so happy.
You believe, my dear aunt, that I am quite happy —
that I have no fear of death — that I am going to
heaven — do you not ?"

" ' I cannot doubt it/

" ^ Well, then, it is all through the merits of my
Lord Jesus Christ. His death atoned for my sins. I
shall soon be with him for ever. Then, my dear
aunt, will you promise me that my dying request, that
you will read these Scriptures of the Old and New Tes-
tament, shall be granted ?' Her aunt assented. ^ Thank
you ; you make me very happy ; and I pray that the
God whom I serve, will of his mercy, enlighten your
understanding, so that you may perceive the truth. I
am tired now 3 I must rest a little.'

^' In the eye which is lighted up by the fever of con-
sumption, there is an expression which those who have
seen it can never forget, and which those who have not
seen it can never imagine.

" How beautiful she looked as she peacefully reposed
upon the white pillow ! Her bright eyes, that were
wont to glow with the very soul of animation, inclosed
within their snowy lids, and their long lashes shading
her marble countenance, which beamed with innocence
and love. I felt in love with the beautiful clay, and
almost wished that my own summons from mortality to
immortality were as near.

^' Reviving, she said, ' I can say but little more.'
Then, putting aside several Bibles for as many of her
relatives, and a letter with each ; ^ Let these be given,

202 LEILA ADA,

with my dying love, to those to whom they are directed
Say, too, I most earnestly beg of each to read them,
and pray over them, and to obtain all possible help to a
knowledge of the Christian religion. And tell them,
that with my latest breath, I testified, Christ is pre-
cious; that he was with me — pre-eminently with me —
while passing through the valley of the shadow of death,
and that through faith in Christ, I was victorious over
death and the grave, and died in full, perfect assurance
of eternal bliss. But be sure of this, tell them plainly,
that it was all through the death of my Lord and Sa-
viour Jesus Christ. Now I must repose. 'Tis almost
finished I' Her articulation of these precious sentences
was painfully interrupted, so that, to say them all,
occupied her some minutes.

" The following day she requested that pen and ink
might be brought to her. AflTectionately clasping her
Bible, she looked once more upon those parts which she
had marked as having given her special encouragement
and enjoyment; then, being supported, she took the
pen in her dying hand, and tremulously and disjointedly
traced upon the fly-leaf the last words she ever wrote :
* Christ is heaven V "

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 203

CHAPTER XY.

Leila's dying hours — the closing scene.
" 0 death ! where is thy sting ? 0 grave ! where is thy victory ?"

'' On the morning of the day on which Leila died,
she said, ' It will soon be finished. Tell my dear father
to come here/ He was called, but was so painfully
affected, that for some minutes he could not speak to
her ! What a scene ! Friends weeping — the youthful
Christian, in heavenly composure, awaiting the solemn
moment of separation from the body. Surely it was
the spontaneous outburst of every heart, ' Is this death ?
Can all this holy joy and peace be death ? Oh ! then,
let me die the death of the righteous, and let my last
end be like hers ! As I looked upon her placid coun-
tenance, I exclaimed exultingly, ' 0 death ! where is
thy sting ? 0 grave ! where is thy victory V Crush-
ing sobs broke upon the awful stillness. Oh, the luxury
of such tears ! — tears flowing from the most sacred emo-
tions of the soul. Let me attempt no remark upon
these heavenly breathings.

" Yoltaire laughed at Christianity — he mocked at the
* madness of believing in the gospeL' Did he ever see
a Christian die ? Did he ever witness this tangible
evidence of the value of religion in the most awful mo-
ment of life ? Oh, never ! never ! The chamber of
the dying saint is a shrine at which the boldest blas-
phemer must bow in homage to the religion of Jesus.

204 LEILA ADA,

" Her fatlier was weeping. ^Do not grieve for me,
my dear papa/ she said, soothingly. ' If you are faith-
ful to Grod, you will soon he happy again with me in
heaven.'

" ' Then, my precious treasure, you are not deceived !
You feel that your religion fully supports you in death ?'

" ' O yes ! 0 yes ! Though I walk through the valley
of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil — his rod —
and — his — ' she could proceed no further. Her father,
bending with grief, retained her hand in his.

" In a little while she gathered strength : ^ Father,'
she continued, ' you love me dearly, do you not ?' My
child do not speak so to me; you know you are the very
soul of my existence.'

" ' Will you grant me one request — a dying request ?'

^' ' What is it ? You know I will not deny you I'

" ^ It is this — that you will never again doubt Jesus
my Saviour ; but that you will begin to love and serve
him. O, think, my dear father, what he has done for
me ! Read the New Testament,' and she looked inqui-
ringly.

" ' My dear, I have begun to read it. I have seen
that your religion must be true. I never expected to
witness a death like yours, my daughter. I have begun
to pray ; you pray too, that Grod will help me to follow
you to heaven. I believe., my dear — I confess to you
and all present that I beUeve — in elesus.'

" The sudden revolution of feeling was too great for
her weak frame. She was just able to articulate, ^ Bles-
sing— praise — ' and then lay exhausted.

^' On recovering, she slowly reached her Bible, and in
faltering accents said, ' My dear papa, I am dying — you

THE JEWISH CONVERT, 205

have — . We shall soon meet again. Here is the Bible
which has been — so truly blessed to mj soul. Let it
now be yours. You have all my books of a religious
character. They are choice — learn them well. Praise
the Lord — I am dying; but I am rejoicing.'

*'She lay for some minutes with her eyes closed.
Occasionally her lips moved as though in prayer. It is
more than probable that her petitions were then ascend-
ing to the throne of grace, that her father might be
enabled to rejoice in the liberty of God's children. They
have been answered !

'■^ Again she unclosed her eyes, and looking upon her
father with a smile of indescribable pleasure — '■ Bles-
sing, honour, praise, and glory to Jesus. Kiss me, dear
papa.'

^' In a little while — ' Glorious hope ! immortality !
eternal life ! What an eternity ! an eternity of perfect
love.'

^' She then, with considerable intervals, gave direc-
tions for her funeral. ' You have said, papa, that you
will have my mother removed, and that we shall all
three lie together in one tomb. I am glad of that. At
my funeral make no show. Do not have me embalmed.
I wish my body to be clothed in linen and white muslin

only When you have my name put upon our

tomb, be sure you put this, " Thanks be unto God who
giveth us the victory, through our Lord Jesus Christ." '

" ' I hear the voice, "The Master is come, and call-
eth for thee." My whole soul responds, "Even so,
come, Lord Jesus." I am full of glory.'

" Although perfectly sensible, she said but very little
after this. She appeared to be looking into eternity
18

206 LEILA ADA,

Its glorious realities were unfolding to her vision, and
feasting her soul with ravishing contemplations.

"About two hours before she died, she suddenly
awoke from a gentle slumber, and exclaimed, ' Dear
Emily ! are you here ?' I took her hand. ' Grive me a
farewell kiss, my love. Thank you ;' and then pressing
my hand with all her remaining strength, ' We shall be
united again soon, Emily, and then-jrou will never have
to separate from me. Love Jesus : it will not be long.'

'' A little after she ejaculated, ' Victory ! victory V
and raised her dying arm. After a few moments —
^ Heaven is — heaven is — ' the rest was lost.

" She lay quietly for about an hour ; then gently
putting out her hand, she said, ' Farewell, my dear papa.
I am going to glory. Serve Jesus — you will soon be
there.'

" These were the last words she uttered. Her eyelids
closed. For a few minutes she breathed softly and
slowly, and then — the solemn stillness of death ! My
friend was a disembodied saint in glory ! Her spirit had
taken its rapturous flight to that blissful rest which she
had so long anticipated ; and in preparation for which,
she had kept her soul with all diligence. Again, through
gushing tears, I prayed, ' Let me die the death of the
righteous.'

'* She died November 27th, 18 — , at a quarter past
eight o'clock in the evening, aged .twenty years and
eighteen days.

^^ Of such a character as hers I need say nothing more
by way of eulogy or description : her death was an epi-
tome of her life.

•' Emily L. F. H ."

THE JEWISH C O N V E 11 T . 207

Leila has since been joined by ber father. He rapidly
sunk beneath the sorrow produced by her death, and
in eleven months was laid beside her in the tomb. He
died peacefully, and with unshaken reliance upon his
E-edeemer.

" The hour is coming in which all that are in the
graves shall hear my voice, and shall come forth ; they
that have done good to the resurrection of life/'

Amen. Even so, come, Lord Jesus.

208 LEILA ADA

CHAPTEE, XYI.

Leila's poetical and prose compositions.

To prevent an undue criticism, we remind the reader
that not one of the Poems which we give, any more
than any part of her other writings, was ever written
with the least expectation that it would meet the eye of
the world. So far from this being the fact, we may
remark that no one while she lived, had the slightest
idea that she ever essayed to make poetic compositions.

Intellectual pleasure and improvement were the only
objects at which she aimed. These attained, the artistic
character of her performance was to her consideration
of little moment.

We have taken the following papers quite at random.
The first poem we give, bears date when she was sixteen
years of age. Let us just observe also, that we can
scarcely find a single piece of versification written after
she had attained nineteen years of age.

SONG OF THE SPIRIT OF JOY

I AM not to be found where the miser is telling

His weight and his measure of gold's sordid dust j
I breathe not the air of impurity's dwelling ;

I fly from the soul sunk in baseness and lust.
I am not in the press, whence blooming and beauty

At dawning return with a pale and wan cheek;
I never am found from the path of fixed duty ;

I outer no heurt which oppresses the weak.

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 209

In vain your white bosoms with diamonds may glisten

Your temple be circled with emperor's crown j
These have no inducement, Tve no ear to listen

To prayers for my presence their sorrow to drown,
I am not in the pomp of greatness or glory ;

I have nothing to do with the conquerors fame j
I never yet breathed in the trumpeted story

Of deeds which from motives of selfishness came.

I live in those hearts which to virtue are given ;

My palace I fix in the yellow-thatched cot;
I sport on those lips which with smiling are riven

Round the peasant's bright hearth — my most belov'd spot.
I dance o'er the meadows, the rose-buds just blooming,

I frolic with nature throughout her domain ;
I live midst sweet bells, in their bosoms entombing

Myself with their petals, so lovely in stain.

I live in the skies among beings cherubic ;

I live in each flower, each tiniest blade ;
Nature gives them their paint, I give them the music,

Which breathes in the soul 'mid the gloomiest shade.
Oh ! seek not in vain among streams of pollution,

You widen our distance, compel us to part ;
Come, think not of loss, I'll make retribution,

My realm is unbounded, my ?tome is the heart.

THE RECLUSE OF THE ALPS.

On a warm afternoon, I left the pretty village, on
the borders of the Lake Leman, in which we were mak-
ing a temporary stay. My purpose was to enjoy a
solitary walk among the romantic and beautiful scenery
of the mountains which rise from the shores of the
Lake.

To the man of reflective and imaginative mind per-
18*

210 LEILA ADA,

haps there is no country presenting a succession of
more charming scenes than Switzerland during the
months of summer. Those who have ever spent this
season there, cannot fail to have the lovely magnifi-
cence of many of its prospects impressed in vivid and
. never-fading characters upon their recollection. How
often have they again in imagination felt that inexpres-
sible awe and sublimity which they experienced while
threading the tremendous abysms of its mountains, or
stealthily looking over the unprotected marge of its
terrible precipices. How often have they over again
felt in their heart that same thrill of warm gratitude
and love to the great Being, whose omnipotence was
seen in the magnificence and majesty before them.
How often have they again experienced the giddy sur-
prise with which they were struck on first opening their
eyes on such and such a prospect, from this or that emi-
nence. It is such scenes as these — such contempla-
tions as these — which elevate the soul to that world
where every beauty is lasting and perfect.

It was in the summer season when I took the walk
which is the subject of my present sketch. For a con-
siderable distance my path lay up a rather steep ac-
clivity. Having gained the eminence I turned to look
upon the smiling Lake. Here and there a white sail
glittered like a young swan upon its blue bosom. Other
boats, rowed both by men and women, were slowly
moving over its smooth surface. At intervals the song
of the Swiss maidens was wafted towards me on the
wings of the gentle zephyrs, as in the valley below
they drove the cows to the milking shed. Nature was
exceedingly lovely, and the soft murmurs of a distant

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 211

mountain stream added much to the delicious dreami-
ness of the effect, seeming to invite to contemplation
and repose.

Turning, I entered a deep and narrow gorge, and for
some distance walked beside a foaming stream, which
rushed past me with the rapidity of an arrow. Soon
the defile began to contract, which warned me I was
walking in the part called the " Haunt of Death." It
is thus named from the circumstance of two lovers
falling over the top of the dreadful precipice, having
missed the plank which crosses the abyss ; and tradi-
tionary gossip says that, at certain seasons, sighs and
wails are to be heard near the spot on which they were
dashed to pieces.

But it is a fearful place. An awful precipice rises on
either hand, with a separation at the bottom very little
more than wide enough to admit of the passage of a
rapid stream, which courses along dark and threatening,
and whirling in gurgling and deep eddies. Along the
side of this stream is a little path. All around was
solitary; the savage torrent dashed on with impetuous
pride ; the shaggy tops of the precipices scowled over
the abyss.

Emerging from this chasm, a sweet but small valley
was stretched before me. I descended a path, in which,
when I had wandered some time, I found another lead-
ing to a neat white cottage. It was the only one I
could see. Its plaintive solitude interested me. In the
front was a small tastefully arranged garden; at the
back a rich orchard. Being determined to invoke the
hospitality, for the cheerfulness of which the Swiss are
as remarkable as any people, I walked up and gently

212 LEILA ADA;

tapped at the door. It was softly opened by a reverend
looking man. The snows of winter were fast settling
upon his head, and time and care had ploughed deep
furrows in his prepossessing and affectionate counte-
nance. He received me with a parental kindness of
look j a calm but melancholy smile for a moment illu-
mined his features. It could not tarry, but was immedi-
ately absorbed in the shadows of a hardly suppressed
grief. He was evidently suffering unwonted sorrow;
and on looking within I was immediately informed of
the cause. There lay the remains of a beautiful girl,
about seventeen years of age. I looked at the re-
signed and peaceful countenance of the father, then at
the angelic daughter. Tears suffused my eyes ; for a
moment I could not speak.

^' Pardon me ; I wished to have a peep at your sweet
paradise, but I will not intrude upon you sacred grief."

"You will not intrude, my dear madame; come
within, if you can feel comfortable in such an humble

cot.''

I walked within, and stooped to gaze upon the lovely
corpse. Innocence and peace had stamped the impress of
heaven upon it. I never felt such an inexpressible com-
mino-ling of sublimity, and awe, and deep delight, as when
I looked at that beautiful form. Could I weep ? No.
A zephyr laden with the perfumes of celestial bowers
* fanned my spirit. In imagination I could hear the en-
raptured songs of the soul which had just fled to the
realms of bliss, and the responsive harpings of the an-
o-elic choir. It was a delicious moment. With my
eyes still fixed upon the beautiful clay I sunk into a
chair near its side.

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 213

All this time I had been so engrossed that I had
taken no notice of the venerable man, to whom I had
before spoken. He stood, his eyes fixed upward, as
though every tie which bound him to earth were now
broken, and he would gladly hear the summons which
called him to rejoin the departed spirit.

" My daughter^ my only child, the joy of my eyes is
taken from me. 0 Adeline ! I thought thy gentle
hands would sustain and support me, and close my eyes
in death. But why do I lament my darling's happi-
ness ? She was the Lord's ; I devoted her to him ; he
has claimed her, and taken her to himself. But what
shall Ido with out my child, to cheer the remainder of my
weary pilgrimage ? Lord, make me thankful that thou
gavGst me and so long permittedst me to enjoy such a
daughter. My aged heart will not beat much longer ;
I shall soon be with her again." I inquired the par-
ticulars of her death. For a moment he buried his face
in his hands ; but his grief was too deep to obtain re-
sponsive tears. On the morning of the previous day she
had left home, blooming in youth, and health, and
beauty, to visit a sick person, residing upon the opposite
side of the Lake. A young lady accompanied her.
Having prolonged their errand of benevolence till the
day began to decline, the shadows of evening encompassed
them, while yet a considerable distance from the shore.
Their little bark proceeded in safety, however, until
they had approached very nearly to the land. Suddenly
they heard a shrill '^Look out,'' from the intoxicated
crew of another and larger boat It was too late. The
next moment, a part of the rigging of the strange vessel
caught their sail. They were immediately overset and

214 LEILA ADA,

both precipitated into the Lake. Adeline uttered a
shriek as the chill waters encircled her in their dark
bosom. A few faint struggles, and then she gently sank
to rise no more. Some dizzy circles ruffling the surface
of the water — a few breakinor bubbles — informed those
who came to save, that human assistance, if it were to
avail, must be quickly rendered. Some minutes elapsed
before the body was recovered. Every effort to resus-
citate it was energetically made; all was in vain; the
spirit had fled ; she had sunk into the fathomless depths
of eternity.

The young lady, her companion, clung to the inverted
boat, until picked up by the revellers, whose incapacity
to act had caused the fatal collision.

That same evening the body of Adeline was borne
slowly home, followed by a crowd of sympathizing
villagers, to whom she was known, and by whom she
was beloved, for her ever-ready kindness and benevo-
lence. The way behind the corpse was watered by the
tears of unstifled grief. The youth and children poured
out the feelings of their overfraught hearts, in audible
cries and sobs

Just as the venerable parent had concluded his narra-
tion, a soft knocking was heard at the door. Leaning
upon his cane he rose to open it. It was made by an
interesting little girl about nine years old. She was a
scholar in a class which Adeline had convened in the
village, for the purpose of studying the Scriptures, and
instructing them in reading, writing, arithmetic, &c.
Directly she obtained admission, she rushed to the bed-
side, and hysterically kissing the faded lips, cried, " 0
my dear governess — my dear mademoiselle Adeline !

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 215

do speak to me once more; do, mj^ dear mademoiselle,
kiss me as you used 5 — oli ! never again I" and slie sat
upon the ground, and rocking lier body to and fro, re-
lieved herself by a flood of tears. Responsive drops
coursed down the father's face, as he sat her upon his
knee. It was a luxury : and I wept too.

'^ Don't cry, Therese," said he, "you must dry your
tears, for Adeline is, very happy — more happy than you
can think ; and you would not wish her to leave so much
happiness to come back, would you ?'^

*' Oh, what shall I do ! what shall I do, without my
dear governess ?" sobbed the child convulsively.

" You must love and serve God, and then you will
be more happy with her in heaven, than ever you were
upon earth. Do you recollect what she has often told
you ?''

" Oh, yes ! I remember, I remember ; she told me
that G-od loves good little children, and that when they
die they go to live in heaven among the angels; and that
there, they are more happy than she could tell me. And
then she used to say, ' Therese, I shall be in heaven ;
mind you meet me there.' Oh ! and now she has gone
there : I am sure she has gone there. She used to make
me kneel down by her side, and tell me to pray, and
tell we what to say. Oh, I will go to heaven, too, and
see her again ! I'll be good : I'll kneel down and pray
as she taught me.''

And, leaping from her seat, she fell upon her knees.
'' Perhaps you will join our petitions," he was, doubt-
less, about to say; but I was already in a kneeling pos-
ture, for I, too, was a servant of the God of Jacob.
After a few moments of solemn silence the venerable

216 LEILA ADA,

recluse ejaculated, '' Now, Therese, my dear, we will
pray."

And never shall I forget the eloquence, the pathos, the
fervour of that child's prayer; I was powerfully affected.

And then the solemn tones of the father ascended like
sweet incense to the throne of the Eternal. It was a day
which will ever live in the sanctuary of my remembrance.

With chastened feelings I rose to.return home. The
little girl was my companion to the village, which now
reposed in the sober shades of evening.

I afterwards visited the tomb of Adeline. She reposes
with her mother, and, perhaps ere now, the father has
rejoined them. ^'Lovely in their lives, in death they
were not divided.'' A modest stone marks the spot —
the brief memorial of the lovely Adeline.

THE BERNESE COTTAGE.

If we would look upon Christianity, smiling in all its
irresistible, and most winning loveliness ; if we would
see it displaying its sweetest beauty, we must seek it in
the abodes of humble life 3 or (that being a term I do
not like) I would rather say, amongst those who are not
encumbered with this world's riches. Among these I
have witnessed the sublimity of its philosophy ; the
grandeur of its sanctified intellect ; the eloquence and
pathos of its poetry ; the purity and fascination of its
exalted patriotism; the unquenchable fire of its love and
benevolence. Ah, if we would see the pure, the soul-
felt religion of the Saviour, we must look at it, as it
appears when unfettered by the trammels of fashionable

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 217

society; not upon that sickly, stunted Christianity,
which is reared in the pernicious atmosphere of the
world. It is too late to say that it is the great panacea
for all the ills of mortality— that it is the only thing
which can make the severest lot contented and happy—
this, all who know anything of its power, believe. But,
while we say this, we might declare further, that if we
would see, and be acquainted with Christianity, pure
and happy as the Bible ordains it to be, we must obtain
our knowledge and perceptions among the dwellings of
the poor. As a proof of its power to make a seemingly
hopeless, forlorn, and wretched condition, a comfortable
and happy one, I give the following simple, and perhaps,
unremarkable incident. However, I reflect that to a
well-balanced mind, nothing can be so trivial as neither
to teach nor give delight.

As late in the afternoon I was returning from a ram-
ble among the mountains of the Bernese Oberland, the
sky became thickly overcast with masses of dense clouds,
and I very soon found that I was in the midst of a
severe storm of thunder and rain. No shelter was in
sight. Awful precipices, and steep mountains, rearing
their white summits till they touched the skies, were on
each side of me. Hastening on, I most unexpectedly
came in view of a small cot. From its dilapidated con-
dition, and its melancholy desolation, my first impres-
sion was that it could not be inhabited. But I was
speedily convinced of the contrary, by perceiving light
columns of smoke ascending from various parts of the
roof. I walked up, and knocking at the door desired
permission to stay until the pelting storm had ceased.
Without any ceremony, but an honest, unsophisticated
19

218 LEILA ADA,

welcome, I was desired to enter. My wet things were
taken off with the greatest assiduity, by the kind young
woman who had opened the door, and hung to dry
around a cheerful fire which was blazing upon the
hearth. And within its genial influence I myself was
in a few moments seated.

This little mansion contained but one room. Its in-
habitants were the pretty, modest young person I before
adverted to, and a little merry girl of about five years
old. All the furniture consisted of a bed, four worn-
out chairs, the ruins of a small round table, and a stool.
On the side, too, there was a book-shelf, on which seven
books — one, a large Bible — were carefully arranged.

The only light which was admitted into the cottage,
was through the numerous crevices in the roof, and two
small, carelessly formed holes, over which was stretched
a piece of thin stuff. But, although everything wore
an aspect of deep poverty, yet all was remarkably neat
and clean ; scarcely a particle of dust rested anywhere.
The young woman was dressed in the usual costume of
the Swiss mountaineers, and wore an apron white as the
newly fallen snow.

I had been seated but a few minutes when a consi-
derable stream of water began to pour in upon us from
the roof. The young woman meekly and contentedly
placed a large pan to catch it. I wondered that in a
situation, which seemed so comfortless, she could look
resigned, and even happy. I suppose my countenance
might have betrayed the workings of my mind, for, as
she fixed the pan, she said to me, '' Ah, mademoiselle,
I am still better off than my divine Master was while
he sojourned on earth. He had not where to lay his

THEJE WISH CONVERT. 219

head; I have a home, very poor certainly, but much
better than I deserve. And often I think," she pur-
sued, her voice trembling with deep emotion — '^ often I
think, as the heavy blasts sweep over my dwelling, how
good and kind is my Heavenly Father, who has provided
me a shelter in the midst of the storm. My room looks
dreary, but here I enjoy a happiness which I would not
forsake if I might wear a crown. Humble and forlorn
as it is, I often feel in the presence of the King of
kings. I often enjoy seasons of the most delightful in-
tercourse with the Father of spirits, and experience
sweet foretastes of the better and happier inheritance I
shall have in heaven."

She now began to prepare supper for herself and the
little girl. It consisted of milk and coarse bread.
Placing the loaf and a morsel of butter near me, she
with a sensitive and delicate reserve invited me to join
them. I saw that anything but a frank acceptance on
my part, would wound her sensibilities, and therefore, I
immediately drew towards the table. The good young
woman asked a blessing, and I made a meal, which for
deep and pure enjoyment I never exceeded. I felt the
calm influences of the peace and contentment which
pervaded every corner of this little cot.

The storm was hushed; the lightnings and rain had
ceased ; and I rose to proceed. My things were com-
pletely dried. With a heart throbbing with love and
gratitude, I took an eternal leave of the mountain cot-
tage ; but of this I am sure, I shall meet its inmate
among that blessed company of blood-bought spirits,
who evermore surround the Saviour's throne, and sing
the praises of his redeeming love.

220 LEILA ADA

THUNDER-STORM IN THE PASSAGE OF THE SIMPLON.

Sublimely terrible ! each rocky cave

Is crashing with loud thunder : quick lightnings

Rush past hissing : how they whirl and wave,

And gleam with horrid beauty ! Now brightening

Each murky glen, a sea of firs they lave

The darkling gorge — its blackness heightening.

The heavy hailstones crush, and torrents hiss

While headlong tumbling down the dark abyss.

Blacker and blacker grows the dusky air,
'Tis night, except as through the rending cloud

Leap the huge fires, the echoing rocks to tear,
A moment rolling back the gloomy shroud,

And lighting every peak with mighty glare !
Flash calls to flash, in thunders long and loud ;

The black lake shines : a meteoric sea

Of bubbles dancing joyously and free.

Hearken ! 'tis like a mighty earthquake's crash,
The echoes shout with rapturous delight;

The mountains quiver, as the fitful flash

Hurls the huge pine adown the giddy height

To the dark pool : one loud, convulsive splash —
One bound — and all is vanished like the light

Which lit them hither. Who has sure defence

But he whose safety is Omnipotence ?
Orevola, June, 18 — .

HYMN TO THOUGHT.

Take wing, my thoughts ! away !
Dash off the cumbrous chains of earthly care.
On, on, ye free! outstrip the winds which bear

Wild ocean's snowy spray.

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 221

On ! where the sunny streams
Burst from deep fountains in the diamond's cell
Where lotus-cups and quivering rushes tell

Of old heroic themes.

On ! where the forest trees
Lift high their heads amid the liquid skies,
And eastern spice-woods grow, and orient flies

Dance in the scented breeze.

On ! to Hesperian climes,
Where palm-boughs shadow in the classic streams,
Where mystic spirits haunt, and starry gleams

Show shrines of olden times.

On ! on ! oh, stop ye not !
On, where loud laughter rings the antique walls j
Mix with the revels in the hearth-lit haUs

Of ages long forgot.

Farther, and loftier yet !
Soar high above the purple mists of night.
To the bright regions filled with holy light

Of suns which never set.

Beyond the gulf of death !
Go, seek the realms of love's immortal rest;
Where the black storm ne'er spreads its threatening crest.

Where sorrow sends no breath.

In flights still more sublime,
Mount, mount ! ye wing'd ! o'ersweep time's deep abyss ;
Kise, where pure spirits reign in holy bliss,
Eternal and divine.
Buomo d'Ossola, 18—.
19*

222 LEILA ADA,

SUNSET.

Enshrouding the valley, empurpling the mountain

The iris-like colours of evening now float;
The last brilliant showers from light's golden fountain

Are laving in beauty the verdure remote.
And soft to the ear is the mild zephyr telling,

Its whisper of gladness and joy from afar j
The birds' homeward song to their wild forest dwelling,

Illumed by the rays of the bright evening star.

From out their deep prisons, the waves' careless music

In richly-hushed murmurs, lull nature's repose,
And tell in soft breathings, symphonious, cherubic,

What infinite joy in their bright bosom glows.
The stars, one by one, purple night is unveiling j

Creation is joining in vespers of praise j
How soothing this hour — solemn silence prevailing.

And sinking to sleep are the last bedimmed rays.

Thus calm may I be as my earth's day is closing ;

Thus smiling with joy may I sink to my rest;
Fall softly to sleep, on my Jesus reposing.

With him to awake in the realms of the blest.
'Twas for this my Redeemer to Heaven ascended.

For this he now makes intercession on high;
Oh, hope full of bliss ! — life's journey being ended —

Thy dawn, Immortality, breaks on the sky.

AFRAGMENT.

In the dry land, where water was not yet,
Wells forth a sweet refreshing rivulet.
The thirsty soil with verdure now is drest.
With peace and j)lenty crowned, the scene is blest.

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 223

Sharon Avith roses glows, and round the tomb
Of man's pollution flowers of promise bloom.
How beautiful the feet of those who preach
Glad tidings of salvation, and who teach
The people holiness ! how lovely they
Who fill the dark holes of the earth with day j
Mighty in faith, renewed in second birth,
Who break the idols and subdue the earth !

While suffering the close and cruel confinement of
her uncle's house, and enduring separation from her
much-loved home, Leila penned an interesting series of
papers. Although they were found separate from her
other " Reflections/' yet they bear the same title, and
are of a like character. We have only space to make a
short extract : —

How fearful was that retribution which fell upon our
nation, for the rejection and crucifixion of Jesus; and
which caused him to weep as he viewed Jerusalem, and
foresaw her fearful doom. Why our people are so
utterly incapable of discerning the hand of God in
their dispersion and oppression from that moment ; and
so, of repenting them of the sins which led to their
punishment, I can account for on no other ground, but
that of judicial blindness.

The imagination cannot conceive a more agonizing
spectacle than that presented at the destruction of Jeru-
salem. Its details are written in blood ; and so full of
horror that the mind transfixed with alarm, refuses to
dwell upon them. Death appeared to gloat amidst
agony, demoniacal insanity, and intense desolation.
The air, laden with the poisonous efiiuvia of the un-

224 LEILA ADA,

buried dead, spread pestilence among tlie living. Mad-
dened by hunger, the mother, who in other circum-
stances would have interposed her own white bosom
between her infant and the sword of the assassin, bore
herself the knife, and then sat down to the horribly
unnatural meal ! At length came the awful, profound
quietude of despair — the sullen hopelessness of com-
plete desolation. So horrid was the catastrophe, that
when Titus entered the city, " he turned away weeping,
and cursing the wretches who had forced him to pro-
duce such misery." Thus fell Jerusalem; a fearful
memento of the retributive justice of the Almighty.

But the downfall of Jerusalem was but the " begin-
ning of sorrows," — it was but the first shock of that
tremendous earthquake which should shake Judea to
her very foundations ; its mighty throes compelling the
Jew to flee in terror for his life. The Koman power
drove the ploughshare of ruin over the Holy City.
Decrees, exiling the Jew from his father-land, sent
him forth homeless, hopeless — a sport for the storm.

Feelings of indignation and revenge burned in his
heart as he gazed upon Mount Tabor, reposing upon the
richly-watered plains of Sharon and Esdraelon, which
lay placidly smiling in all their sunny beauty. There
lay Galilee, spread out in its brilliant and ideal loveli-
ness. Who can describe his emotions, while thus an
exile looking upon the land which was given to his an-
cestors, and from which he had been driven with min-
gled cruelty and scorn ? Summoning all their remain-
ing powers, at the command of an impostor, the Jews
made an unfortunate effort to regain possession of their
country. It was a lamentable attempt; it increased

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 225

the fury of their oppressors, and aroused their bitterest
feelings of hostility. In it, 580,000 Jews perished.
From that period to the present they have never been a
compact nation, but one scattered in fragments to all
corners of the earth ; for there is no country in which
they are not found. They have been again and again
the objects of the most cruel oppression, and the most
agonizing and terrible and cruel massacres. But, as I
cannot bear to dwell upon their punishment, I would
rather take up a more pleasing theme — their conversion
to Christianity — an event which is explicitly predicted
in the Scriptures of both the Old and New Testa-
ments.

Christianity was originally founded, professed, and pro-
pagated by Jews ; and it would be well if the attention of
our people were more positively drawn to this fact. After
the crucifixion of Jesus, a number of creditable and up-
right Jews, who were acquainted with his life, miracles,
death, and resurrection, boldly challenged their con-
temporaries to come forward and contradict their asser-
tions respecting him. Far from accepting this chal-
lenge, the Sanhedrim made an acknowledgment that
the miracles wrought by our Saviour, and by his apos-
tles could not be called in question. By this act
they subscribed their belief in his divinity. A conse-
quence of it was, that many thousands of the Jewish
people, and also many of the priests believed. On
leavino- Judea the Jewish converts carried the Gospel
with them, and preached it to the inhabitants of the
countries into which they entered. By these also it was
embraced.

Even the very idiom— the very structure of the

226 LEILA ADA,

Gospel language, is insuperable proof of its Hebrew
origin. But, although the great mass of the Jewish
nation have rejected him in whom their brethren be-
lieved, yet the preservation of their sacred books,
and their calamitous experience in consequence of
their unbelief, has been to Christianity a munition and
defence, which has resisted the fiercest assaults from
without.

For their perversity, the Jews carry with them the
marks of the divine indignation and retribution. But,
alas, for their deplorable condition ! they know nothing
of the sanctifying and exalting influences which should
attend his afflicting hand. Persecution and trial refine
and elevate the Christian; but no such results are
witnessed in the Jewish character. And why ? Be-
cause they are not sufiering for truth. We therefore
find, that in proportion as they have endured, in that
proportion has the Jew become hardened and impervi-
ous to the invitations of the glorious Gospel of Christ.
Thus their lives are earthly and sensual, and they
have no well-grounded, no lawful hope of the world
to come.

But, melancholy as this picture is, it is not without
its redeeming point. The eternal purpose of God has
determined that the Jewish nation shall be brought
within the enclosure of the church of Christ ; they shall
be '^born again /^ they shall be a holy people, trees of
righteousness bringing forth fruit to the praise and glory
of God.

The signs of the times are already encouraging;
thousands of Jews are giving themselves to the study
of the Scriptures of the New Testament. Of this I am

THE JEWISH CONVERT. 227

quite sure— the wall of partition, which through so
many centuries prevented all Christian access to them,
is being broken down ; and they are not only beginning
to listen to the Gospel with candid attention, but really
court conversation upon Christian topics. Among them
may be seen an earnest desire to know the truth. Chris-
tians, too, are awaking to their responsibility to the Jew-
ish nation, and are bringing their instrumentality to bear
upon them in the most energetic forms. I cannot now
take such low ground as only to speak of individual
instances of success, for there are strong and particular
reasons for supposing that the glorious ingathering of
the house of Abraham into the Church of Christ is at
no great distance. In fact, the work is begun ; and, to
a great extent, is already done. Old prejudices are
speedily giving way ; mutual dislike is vanishing ; a
spirit of inquiry is aroused ; almost everywhere an easy
access to the Jewish mind may be obtained ; the inter-
dicts and countenance of the rabbis are daily decreasin^y
in value and effect; — all conspire to excite the most
lively hopes.

I do not know that I should be too bold — I am not
sure I should exaggerate the truth — if I said that were
it not for fear of their brethren, for fear of those hundred
little things which they must suffer ; for instance, per-
haps, to be separated from their kindred both in life and
in death; and were it not that distrust of the Chris-
tians is not altogether uprooted — were it not for these
I think there are thousands who are ready to come and
avow their change of mind. Oh ! if the Christians
will earnestly labour for our poor nation ! One of the
first efforts should be to disabuse their minds of all pre-

228 LEILA ADA,

judice wliicli they may have imbibed, through witness-
ing the conduct of nominal disciples of Jesus. An
effort should be made to convince them that the real
Christians are not parties to their oppression, and suffer-
ings and degradation ; that they have no sympathy with
those who load them with opprobrium and scorn ; that
whatever feelings the unconverted Gentiles may enter-
tain towards the Jews, those of the Christian G-entiles
towards them are pure and holy, and benevolent.

It were well to be frank with them, and disclaim all
sympathy with the Christianity of a majority of profes-
sors, and to tell them, that for this mere general pro-
fession of Christianity there is no more salvation, than
for the perverse Jew who wilfully rejects the Messiah ;
but, above all, always and at once assume that Jesus of
Nazareth is the true Messiah, bringing the whole current
of recorded proofs and prophecies to bear upon the mo-
mentuous question. Fearlessly and boldly assert this
doctrine ; let it be the rock on which you rear your
superstructure ; take no sinuous course ; go direct to the
very vitals of your belief. This, from the constitution
of the Jewish mind, will have the weightiest effect.
Thus being girt with the armour of truth, and having
in your hands the sword of the Spirit — even the blessed
word of God — your efforts cannot be in vain.

As far as possible, too, I would say (unless the object-
ing Israelite would not permit it), avoid generality and
minor details. Keep to the great theme — the divinity
and office of our Lord Jesus Christ — and, perhaps,
nothing could be more effectual than the fact of his re-
surrection, ably and clearly demonstrated : this must
silence the boldest blasphemer. Compel them to yield

THE JEWISH CONVERT, 229

here, and they are for ever subdued to the faith of the
^' Crucified One." To convince them that the ^' Car-
penter's Son" is the ''Holy One of God/' should
always be the burthen of our message. This gained,
and the rock of their impenitence is broken.

But God has reserved to himself the Spirit by whose
influence this great work is to be effected. Therefore,
strong, energetic, agonizing prayer must be poured out
in behalf of the '' lost sheep of the house of Israel."
Our system may be ever so in accordance " with the di-
vine will, but, of itself, it will never be sufficient to '' turn
away ungodliness from Jacob." It is God who will do
it. " I will pour upon the house of David, and upon
the inhabitants of Jerusalem, the Spirit of grace and
gupplication, and they shall look upon him whom they
have pierced, and they shall mourn for him as one
mourneth for his only son, and shall be in bitterness for
him as one that is in bitterness for his first-born."
Therefore, all ye, whose ^' heart's desire and prayer to
God for Israel is, that they might be saved," remember
that God has made the outpouring of his Spirit indis-
pensable, and for it must our earnest prayers ascend on
high.

DEATH OF AN INFANT.

I GAZED upon that infant as it slept : —
That sleep was strangely beautiful, and seemed
An ectasy immortal. The curtaining lids
Had dropped their silken fringes o'er the soul,
And shut out all except the beams of Heaven.
A sacred glory rested on her brow.
And mantled o'er her cheek ; a lovely smile
20

230 LEILA ADA,

Sat like a cherub on her faded lips :
A solemn rapture was that dying scene ;
Celestial spirits fanned it with their wings —
It breathed the air of heaven. She oped her eyes —
Those bright blue eyes still looked as they were wont.
The very soul of tenderness and joy.
They sought her mother's face, again to feast
Upon its beauty ! forth from them spoke a rest.
Such only as the innocent may feel.
The Angel of the Covenant had come
To wing her home. At his august command,
Death quick unbound his shaft, and touched her heart,
Curdling her hot life's blood. "With ruthless haste
He closed her snowy lids, and bound her brow
With ice. His spoils were done ! He seized her breath.
The roses on her cheeks ; but left that pure
And holy smile. He did not dare steal that j
For it belonged to Heaven,

THE END.

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