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Full text of "Life"

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Bound 
AUG 1 1903 




l^arbacli College l.ttirar5 



FROM THE 



BRIG^HT LKCiAC'V. 

Descendants of Henry Brifj^ht, jr., who died at Water- 
town, Mass., in i6S6, are entitled to hold scholarships in 
Harvard College, established in iSSo under the will of 

JONATHAN BROWN BRIGHT 

of Waltham, Mass., with one half the income of this 
Legacy. Such descendants failing, other persons are 
eligible to the scholarships. The will requires that 
this annonncexnent shall be made in every book added 
to the Library under its provisions. 



Received JLO ^iC./f.C>X...7T..4-^..^oun 



r)o\ 





VOLUME XLI. 

^a 1 1 1 ! a r ij — Ju nc 

1903. 



Ihhei at tie Life Office ■» 

1^^ Cntfftl at WYWat 0)f«» «> S^:ond. Clms HaU flatter- " 1^*^^^ jQfK ' 



West jnst St. 



PAUB 

Above the Clouds 588 

Absorbed 594 

According to Newton 191 

Ade, Geo 394 

Ad Infinitum 250 

Advertisement 182 

Advice to Bores 112-3. 156-7 

-^sop Up to Date 302, 385 

After Christmas i 

After Fifteen Years 392-3 

After the Holidays 25 

Airy Persiflage 507 

Alas 366, 375 

Alas, Poor De Lesseps 490-1 

Alice in March 243 

All Absorbing Love, An 183 

All the World's a Stage 411 

Americanized 572 

Americans Abroad 563 

Anatomical 5 

And shall we never meet again ^ 523 
And so you won't let me be 

yours 285 

Announcement 177, 563 

Another Victim 465 

Answer, The 70 

April 34 

Arabian Nights up to Date 590 

Arbitration 390 

At the Sign of the Bow ana 

Arrow 487 

Aut Scissors Aut Nullus. .16, 38, 

58, 78, 98, 118, 140, 147, 162. 

184, 206, 228, 252, 274, 296. 

304, 334. 354. 376, 3^8, 422. 

452, 472, 496, 524, 554. 574 598 

Baby's Omar 151 

Back to Asia ^^ 

Bad Boy 174 

Ballade of Knightly Clothes, A. 416 

Ballade of Lent 171 

Ballade of the Illustrious 294 

Ballade of the Undiscovered 

Country 324 

Bear Possibility, A 465 

Beatrice F 565 

Blaisdell, E. W 129, 131, 263, 585 

Bobbie, did you know I was 

going to Marry your Sister? 117 

Book Shop Girl.. 1 53, 198, 374, 522 

Booky Bits 69 

Bores 390 

Boys, don't you know it's wicked 

to fight? 301 

Broken Lease, The 466-7 

Brute ventures to suggest that 
a Bonnet might possibly be 

more suitable 200-1 

Bully! We'll have real Horses, 
a real Brook (and real 

Actors) 158 

Burial of the Trusts, The 348-9 

Business and Pleasure 455 

Business 'Boom, A 463 

Busy Day, A 271 

By George, none of the Game 
Laws ever seem to apply to 

that Boy! 288 



Can't you hurry a Bit, Clara? 
We must catch the Sawyers 
and Congratulate them on 

their Marriage 83 

Case of Necessity, A 353 

Case of Present Treatment, A.. 50 

Cash Register and Ledger 551 

Catechism Universitatis Futurae 449 

Challenge 504 

Changed 449 

Change for $5? 293 

Chant of a Grateful New 

Yorker 85 



CONTENTS. 



PAOB 

Charge of the Four Hundred. 47 

Chicken Sandwich. A 85 

Civilization and Progress 85 

Coal Mining 6q 

College Man, The 5^8-9 

Comfortable enough Beast to 

Ride 450 

Commentator. A 545 

Compulsory Harmony 43 

Cupid's Candle 494 

Cupid's R 459 

Dante's Inferno? 139 

Day Dream, A 251 

Delaware 469 

Desperate course of a Lover 
whose Fiancee is a con- 
firmed Lion-hunter 246-7 

Dessert 8 

Dispossessed 17B-9 

Doloroso-Capriccioso 585 

Don't Quarrel with the Cab- 
man 347 

Don't shoot. Grandpa Hoar! 

You may kill me 132 

Don't worry about him. Dear. 

All the World loves a Lover 87 
Don't vou have electric Lights 

and Onyx Pillars in Heaven? 293 
Don't you think six Clubs a 

good many to belong to?. . 303 

Down with the Gout 37^ 

Do you think it is going to 

Explode? 486 

Drama.. 12, 34. 54, 74, 94, 114, 
136, 158, 180, 202, 224, 248, 
270, 300, 328, 350, 372, 394, 

420, 448, 468, 492, 520 

Drastic Measure, A 331 

Drawing his own Conclusion.. 48 

Dying Calendar, The 7 

Easter Carol, An 285 

Easter Catechism, The 292 

Easter Inquiries 293 

Easter Offering 292 

Easter on the Avenue 292 

Editorial. .4, 26, 46, 66, 86, 106, 
128, 150, 172, 194, 216, 240, 
262, 286, 320, 342, 364, 386, 
406, 440, 460, 484, 510, 542, 

562, 586 

Educational 134-5 

Ef that city Chap, what com- 
plained Winter was devoid 
of Amusin' Features could 
see Bill Bumpstid since he 

froze his 272 

Elopers have returned to ask 

your Blessing 227 

Emergencies that we must Face. 527 

English Table D'Hote 3^3 

Enthusiastic Patron, An 494 

Even in Lent some people con- 
tinue their Pranks 205 

Evolution of the Game Hog. 197 

Expected It 91 

Expensive 319 

Experientia Docet 321 

Fable of Fashion, A 265 

Family Seal 462 

Father, I cannot tell a lie 

(Cherry Tree) 152 

Father Knickerbocker to George 

Washington 177 

Father, who turned us out (Po- 
tatoes) ? 469 

Feather Fancy, A 239 

February (Clay) 105 

Fellerock, The - 546 

Filipino's Prayer. The 512 

First Lesson, The 410 



PAOB 

First-Nighter, The 48 

First Syndicate Performance. 469 

Fish Pictures 221 

Five Stages, The 373 

Flirt. The 373 

Florida 167 

For Love and Spring make a 

Goose of Everyone 351 

Fragment from the Oxyrhynch- 

ous Papyri, A 203 

French History 302 

Fresh Air Fund 588 

Future of Cattle-Brick. The 76 

Game of *Tollow the Leader".. 127 

Game of Hearts, A 521 

German Bird 3*7 

Getting Acquainted 271 

Getting ready for the Summer 

Trade 488 

Getting the good Things of 

LIFE 365 

Get your Money's Worth if 
you can, but don't overlook 

the man on the fence 49 

Giving Up 323 

Gloomy (Jutlook for Pa, A 410 

Going down for the third Time. 215 

Golfer Cupid 469 

Golfer's Paradise, The 414 

Good Sign, A 55 

Gosh, Maria, he's the handiest 

Help I've ever hired 544 

Government Emphatically by 

the People 87 

Gracious! So that's a fried Egg 444 
Grandma, I am five Years old 
to-morrow, and to have a 
Cake with five Candles. 63 
Great American Family Ques- 
tion, The 464 

Great Invention, A 347 

Great Lily-Pads! These Toadies 

make me Tired 374 

Great Satellites! Another one? 6 

Hands Up! 5 

Hang the Luck! Not a Drop of 

Ice Water for a Bath 3^9 

Happy Faculty, A 343 

Hardly Worth While 261 

"arold and his Pa. .30, 176, 204, 550 
Hat itself is pretty, hut does it go 

with my Horns? 151 

Health 51 

Heartless 325 

Helen J 564 

Her Easter Hat 292 

Here's mi Regar's (hie). Fel- 
lows (hie). Alius (hic) like 
t' drink with gen'lemen 

myse'f 76 

Her Father's Daughter 287 

Her Journey 407 

He was the Man. After all 175 

Hey there! No Children allowed 

in this Tree 242 

His Duty 297 

His Faithless Legs 559 

His Reason 543 

History Repeats Itself 552 

Hoist with his own Petard 91 

Horatius at the Bridge 34^ 

Hounded 521 

Housewife's Omar, The 388 

How about Mamma?. 412 

How did your Ladyship find the 
Jewels I caused to be Con- 
veyed to you? 130 

How long have you been in 

New York, Uncle? 443 

How long will it take to make 
this Monument to my Hus- 
band? 321 



contM^Ts. 



PAOB 

How maiw can I have? 57 

How on Earth could he do it?. . 573 

How to Flirt 530 

How to Win Success 516 

How Tramping Titus lost two 

Pair of Trousers 516 

How We saved a Home 513 

How would you like to have 

your Picture taken? 250 

Humpty Dumpty sat on a Wall. 138 



I believe you call every Girl 

your Divinity 407 

I don't believe I care for Fruit, 

anyway 221 

H I thought you could live 

down your Reputation as a 

bad Man I could marry you. 296 

I flatter myself this Farce will 

be one of the best of the 

Season 47^ 

If Theodore Roosevelt's Ances- 
tors had stayed at Home... 444 
If you Folks can't learn Man- 
ners (Mice and Tails under 

Table) 75 

If you open your Mouth, I 

shoot (Burglar) 363 

If your Daughter trusts me, Sir, 

why can't you? 77 

I kpow you must have made 

Love to some other Girl 409 

Illustrated Lecture on Literary 

New York 531 

I Love this Toy the Best of all ... . 339 

Incense 257 

In Forty-Second Street 225 

In Praise of Tobacco 204 

In proportion 155 

In Saecula Saeculorum 45 

Interrupted Courtship, An 132 

Tn the Garden of Harmony 265 

In Time of the Theatrical Trust ... 493 
In View of Agitation concern- 
ing Traffic, Street Car pic- 
tures reprinted i8i 

Irish Lover, The 225 

Isn't the Bouquet throwing 

being rather overdone? 152 

Isn't there a great Difference in 

their Ages? 471 

Is that the Bible you are Read- 
ing? 417 

It draws the Lightning 115 

It is a wise Ass that knows its 

own Driver 591 

It's not as hot as I thought it 

would be 571 

It was all right 272 

I want you to mention my Dia- 
monds being stolen . .\ 31 

I wish I. had your Talent 387 

Jack, dear, when you are gone 

I shall pine away 199 

January (Clay) 3 

Jones has asked Miss Robinson 

to sit out the next Dance. 

Refreshments served 273 

John, you've been drinking again 

(Giraffe) 6 

Judge charged the Jury. The 49 

Judgement of Bishop Valentine. 133 

June 515, 541 

June Blossoms 511 

Just before the Curtain Rises. . 451 

Kickers' Column 27, 50 

Kind of Funny, After All 441 



Lament of the Sleepless, The. . 96 
Land of the Midnight Son, The. 70 



FAOB 

Latest Books: 6, aB, 48* 68, .88, 
108, 130, i§2, 174, 196, 218, 
242, 264, 288, 322, 344» 366, 
388, 408, 442, 462, 486, 512, 

544* 588 

Lenten Letter, A 171 

Lest we Forget 145 

Let Joy be Unconfined 67 

Let's Kiss and Part 55© 

LIFE'S Dictionary of Inter- 
national Biography 27, 55 

LIFE'S Fashions for 1903: 48, 
87, 159, 174, 197, 242, 263, 

330, 352, 360, 462 
LIFE'S Guide to Summer Read- 
ing 566 

LIFE'S Photograph Gallery: 

442, 494, 551, 573 
LIFE'S Suggestions for Artistic 

Street Signs 88 

Light Diet, A 291 

Literary Notes 512 

Little Boy, does your Mother 
know you spend Money 

Playing Craps? 420 

Looks bad for the Bill 291 

Look here. If you write a 
Sequel — (Hero of Histori- 
cal Novel and Author) 561 

Look! Ji-Jimmy, wha' what's 

that? 544 

Look, Papa, the Duke has 

brought his Coronet 368 

Love at First Sight 396 

Love Laughs at Bolts and Bars, no 

Love on Skates 89 

Lovers 182 

Love's Fetter 550 

Luxury of Travel in New York. 72-2 



Made Up Minds 417 

Magician, The 495 

Making Bread Pills 370-1 

Mamma, I don't believe that 

little Jones Boy is so bad . 182 
Mamma, don't you think I'm 
large enough to put on long 

Pants? 595 

Manchuria's Fixed Constella- 
tion 567 

Man's Conquest, A 108 

Man who didn't Fail, The 137 

March 193 

Marriage Ceremony or Baptism. 535 

Mary had a little Lamb 331 

Mashed Potatoes 594 

May 439 

Meadow and Brook 439 

Merely a Postponement 405 

Metropolitan Critic, The 411 

Millionaire trying to "Kill 

Time" 563 

Mill Race, A 2Q 

Mill That Jack Built. The 590 

Miss Ladybug and Mr. Bumble- 
bee 57 

Mistake of a Mother, The 297 

Misunderstanding, A 325 

Moneybags takes the Air 539 

More than Rumor 14 

Morning, Noon and Night 395 

Mother is on our Side, Anyway. 583 
Mother will be down in a 

Minute 241 

Mr. A. Merger Hogg is taking 
a few Days' much needed 
rest at his country Home.. 518-9 
Mr. Buckton says he likes a 

social Game of Poker 414 

Mr. Dragon Fly and Mr. Cater- 
pillar 450 

Mr. Elephas and the Journalist 

(Elephants* Elopement) .... 35 

Mr. Fish and Worm on Hook. . 443 



Mrs. Mouse and Swiss Villa full 

of Holes 522 

Mrs. Squirrel and the Bird 505 

Municipal Mots 249 

My Uncle dies Yesterday, Sir, 

and I want you to officiate. 267 

My! What a Dust I'm Raising. . 567 



Never 95 

Newer Education 533 

New Generation, A 37 

New Heraldry, The 367 

New Preparations 266 

New York and the New Year.. 14 

Nocturne- Andante 125 

No Stop-Over 250 

Not Impossible Experience, A. 182 
Now, Uncle Hayrick, don't you 
think Maude's new Gown a 

Triumph? 13 

Now, wouldn't that jar you? Just 
look at the Dutchman swim- 

min' in thot icy Water 263 

Nulla Dies Sine Linea 596 

Nursing bottle of the Far North. 585 



Of course, we needn't believe 
Everything we hear about 

our Friends 449 

Of course you will come to Sun- 
day School 301 

Oh, come. Carl! You know we 

must make these Calls 249 

Oh, fluttering Heart, sit still!.. 15 
Oh, Jack! The Engineer didn't 

hear you Toot 218 

Oh, stop crying, Emily. People 
can't always be loving each 

Other 30 

Oh, yes, it's a good Likeness, 
but you know Frances al- , 

ways did take well 149 

Old Man Washington and 

Neighbor 160 

Ominous 176 

One of the Dangers of the 

Third Rail 389 

One-Sided Affair, A 88 

Only a Dream 198 

Only Way. The ...: 487 

On the Site of Newark, N. J., 

2903 A. D 589 

Orchard Blossom, An 567 

Original May First 385 

Other Books received 174. 196 

Our Fellow Citizen, the Sultan 

of Zulu, and his Wives 54 

Our Foolish Contemporaries. 526, 576 

Patriotic 444 

Peace with Honor 160 

Peach Crop, A 592-3 

Perils of Springtime Golf 367 

Personal Case, A 116 

Phoebe, see how the color has 

run in this Waist 345 

Pie 416 

Pill for Bill, A 195 

Plea, A , 289 

Plea for Ignorance, A 594 

Poet is a Person who Writes 

a- Sonnet 285 

Point of View 120 

Pony of Love, A 266 

Portrait of Gentleman who was 
unwilling to attend a fancy 
dress Ball until he saw him- 
self in Costume 485 

Postals from a Home-made Son 

to a Self-made Father 351 

Prayer of the Predaceous, The. 546 

Problem Play, A 448 



Proper Manner of . returning 
Salutation of Friend in 

Gasoline Automobile 388 

Prophecy, A 127 

Proposal, A 23 

Proved Romance, A 345 

Pshaw! Nothing on at the 

Opera House to-night 588 

Pugilistic Term 196 

Queen of Hearts, A 116 

Raising the Devil 296 

Recent Fiction 396 

Reception Committee Welcom- 
ing Cottagers at a Jersey 

Summer Resort 552 

Rcggy's Christmas Present 9 

Result of a large Voice in a 

Small Room 461 

Retort Courteous, The 49, 437 

Rules for Metropolitan Street 

Railway Conductors 445 

Rural Free Delivery 413 



Said the Ice Trust to the Coal 

Trust 463 

St. Patrick 218 

St. Patrick and the Serpent 226 

Same Old Song 375, 397 

Sam set to Music, A 521 

Sanctum Talks 450, 489, 570 

Saved on a Salary of Five Thou- 
sand Dollars a Year 570 

Say, Boss, did your Barber have 
much Trouble parting your . 

Horns in the Middle 95 

Say, Dad, where do bad Boys 

go when they Die? 67 

Say, Mister Officer, if this 
young Lady is engaged to 
two, can't she be arrested 

fer Bigamy? ,. 552 

Scenes of our Youth 570 

Schedule for an Up-to-Date 

New Yorker 173 

Secret, The 52-3 

See here, young Fellow (Uncle 

Sam and Venezuela) 7 

Seeing Things 95 

See, Johnny! An old-fashioned 

Stage Coach 445 

Sense and Incense 177 

Shady Story, A 271 

Shade of Elizabeth and Auto- 
mobile 71 

She belongs to 400, doesn't she? 29 

She, too. IS lucky (chicks) 303 

Signor Mascagm's Impressions 

of the Land of Freedom... 95 

Six A. M 222-3 

Sleeping Beauty, The 509 

Snapshots in Hades 28. 16B, 

266, 289, 489 
Snatches of Conversation heard 

on the Avenue 591 

Social Push, The lo-i 

Society 67, 9i» m, 138, 301, 

^ . ^ 367, 389, 470, 51 1» 54^ 

Society Butterfly, A 36 

Soldier's Valentine, A no 

So long as Colonel Lexington 
had to wear glasses he in- 
sisted upon the right Kind. . 387 
Some Designs for Book Plates, 

131, 182, 264, 344 
Some International Correspond- 
ence 365 

Some Letters of Recommenda- 
tion 195 

Some Notes on Labor 391 

Some Snapshots of the Pullct- 

ville University Picked Nine 587 



Content^. 

Song of a Sermon, The 171 

Spheres of Influence 486 

Splendeur Dex! Had we but 
known of this Conceit dur- 
ing our Reign on Earth 71 

Spring 319 

Spring, Spring, Gentle Spring. . 361 

Still another Man with the Hoe. 411 

Still the Champion 446-7 

Stolen Sweets ...418-Q 

Story when Mother Heard it, 65 
Strange! I can't seem to make 

Rmgs 514 

Street Sayings 302 

Strong Business Proposition, A 17s 

Success to Trade 35 

Suggestion for a Monument 
which might be presented to 

Transatlantic Friend 245 

Suggestions for Artistic Street 

Signs 68,107 

Summer Girl, The 483 

Surely the Hon. Joe Chamber- 
lain deserved his Welcome.... 7 
Symposium, A 443 

Take in that Spinnaker. We are 

nearing the Flatiron 322 

Taken from the Enemy 213 

Teddy's Coming 408 

Temptation of St. Anthony, The 32-3 
Ten little Millionaires standing 

in a Line 219 

Tentative Verses 585 

That Inevitable Delay 397 

There are those who never re- 
spond to the Opportunity. . 596 
There is no Accounting for 

Taste 92-3 

These country Boys who come 
to the City for Fame often 
leave Something better be- 
hind 25 

They are calling for the Author. 

What shall I do? 553 

They must get kind of mixed up 
in Heaven with so many 

Mrs. Brown's about 203 

They say that cycling's out of 

Fashion 502 

Things like This 509 

This, certainly, is the longest 

Meal I ever had 470 

This is the last time I shall ever 

ask you to be my Wife.... 173 

This is the Season 373 

Tie up on the Bridge, A 352 

Time's Valentine 131 

Toast, A 215 

Toast to the Irish Blood, A 220 

To make a long Story short — 451 

To Myrtilla 171 

Too much Ballast 545 

To Saint Valentine 129 

To Spring 344 

Total Strangers 239 

Trick for Trick 329 

Trifle behind the Times, A 204 

Trojan Horse, The 268-9 

Truth 249 

Trying his Hand 290 

Turn about is Fair Play 5S» 543 

Twentieth Century Document, 293 

Twentieth Century Idyl, A 597 

Two's Company, Three's a 

Crowd 326-7 

Two Stages 492 

Two Views 56 

Typographical Term 261 

U. S. Army Post, A 272 

U. S. Senate in Session, The 329 

Usual Question of Precedence, 263 



Valentine, A 107, 137 

Valentine to Sibylla 129 

View of New York by a Pessi- 
mist, A 153 

Walking Delegate of the Fu- 
ture, The 547 

Wanderer on the Face of the 

Earth. A 352 

Wasn't there any Time while 
making Love to me that you 

were embarrassed? 15 

Wedding Feast—Rice, The 296 

Wedding Ring. The 481 

Welcome to Summer 548-Q 

What a Shot that was! 75 

What a very small Thing fright- 
ens our G. O. P 483 

What Interesting Sermons you 

Preach 346 

What is Home without a Cook. 138 
What is your Objection to him. 

Papa? 365 

What Reckoning do ye keep, 

and steer her by what Star? 97 

What's in a Name? 514 

What's your Hurry? 175 

What way did you come. 

Ma'am? (St. Peter) 217 

When the Thermometer is low. 271 

When Winifred was Twenty-two 577 

Where is St. George? 415 

Whitmanically Put 288 

Who are They? Contest (An- 
swer) 96 

Wholesale Generosity 464 

Who's the Victim 345 

Why, he can hatch more Eggs 

than that! 389 

Why not advertise the sensa- 
tional Novel in a Sensation- 
al Way n 

Why she didn't get the Place. ..298-9 

Widow, The 227 

Windy Day, A 324 

Winter and Summer 116 

Wish, A 413 

With a Fan 387 

With all my Heart 39& 

With Bread and Cheese and 

Kisses 459 

Working Costume of a Hoosier 

Poet 571 

Worst Newspaper, The, 

75, 90. 181, 225 
Wot's dat you say? You don't 

love me? 27 

Yankee Foozles 529 

Ye Plaint of ye Tuneful Weaver. 492 

Yes, those Patent Breakfast 

Foods gave me Indigestion. 322 

Yis, me Frinds, awn this Day 
(Mr. Casey and Washing- 
ton's Birthday) 154 

You Americans cannot deny 
that at smart Functions you 
drink too much 421 

You didn't seem to love me, at 

first 445 

You do not inject enough con- 
tempt, spite and Venom into 
that Word 5^4 

You'll miss half the Fun if you 

don't take me, too 513 

Your daughter. Madam, is a 

born Princess 589 

Your Diet 595 

Your Parents seem to have got- 
ten over Dislike for me iCii 

Your Wife has opened an Ac- 
count with us, Sir, and I 
called about it 237 

You will get tired of refusing 

me some Day 331 



VOLUME XLI. 



NEW YORK, JANUARY 1 , 1 903. 

Entered at the New York Poet Om«e iT^Mond-Claas Mall Matter. 



NUMBER 1053. 




AFTER CHRISTMAS. 

** WELL, MIH8 8U8AN, I SUPPOSE YOU «OT SOMrTUING USEFUL AND ORNAMENTAL IN YOUR STOOKIHG?** 

**8IRl" 



lift DC* THV ACT OF lifll . 



LIFE 




V^N NORDEN 
TRUST COMPANY 

751 FIFTH AVENUE-NEAR 58^-** STREET 
NEW YORK 

Capital and Surplus, $2,000,000 



Absolute security is assured depositors by^ — 

1, Capital and Surplus of $2,000,000 ; 

2. Stockholders* liability of $1,000,000 ; 

3- Semi-annual examinations of the Company's condi- 
tion by the New York State Superintendent of Banks ; 

4. Restrictions governing investments ; 

5* Supervision by a Board of Directors composed of 
men chosen for their business knowledge and wide experi- 
ence. 

The Company is a legal depository for Trust 
Funds, and for City, County and State Moneys. 



o P F I c B R & 

Wnmer M. Van Nc^ndto, F^wttdrmi M&Hon C KtclhrjK Vict- ^ ft* am,t J^ > 

Edlwiifd S, Af«ry, Tr^ii O^.r^ 



Wjimer Van Norden 
Wjirtitr M. Van Mordftn 

Mm H }■ liiskf 
} it 03^1 raitou 
HoUh <:t>rtM9tiui N* BUj* 



DIRECTORS 

ritiqi<)nt Clarke 
Henry f . Sboammker 
Kfnjaaiin Perkirbt 
Rkchard \^ IjJwardi 
Joim H. Wa^bbum 
junaLlikn B. Uumy 



ExnM. Hia^mann 
C harks W, M4»r>« 
MahLon D. llmtttier 
Hetifv H. Cdofc 
Henry 1\ l^runwin 
Artliur A. FtiWJftr 



Goln^ Into Business 

A min imfncUittdy tikc^ iti^i fo pmicd Kim 
mviriinurnit. You «f« ihir Invci^lcid cjpitjl for 
your fimlly. Protccr iHcm by Life IniuriJite tn 

The Prudential 

Insurance Company of America 

JOHN F, DftYDEr* 
Prti^Pilfni 




IS2-^ A.D. 



2 2 
GOLD MEDALS 



LONDON 1861 
PHIIMIPMIA \m 
VIENNA 1873 
CHICAGO 1893 
LONDON \m> 
BUFFALO 1901 
PARIS 1867 
1878 1300 



The Worlds Best Tonic 
Imported from Trinidad bwi 



UnrJvajtcd appetiztng Conic and siomafh 
corretik^e, recommended by physicians. A 
lialf a wine-glass before or after meals ox 
before retiring strengthens ihe jaded siom- 
ach. A few dashes in pure liquor* sherry » 
or champagnci the epicure** delight. In- 
dispensable on every private side boards. 
Refuse imitations ^nd cheap Eubstiiutes. 
None genuine except Dr» Siegert^s. On 
the market 70 years, ftfade only by 

DR« J. G. B. SIEGERT & SONS. 

Ail GrLiurs an J Druggists, 

J. W. WUPPERMANN/Sole Agent, 

NEW YORK, N. Y. 




R^emington 

Type^vriter 

Simple ? Yes 
Sure ? Yes 
Swift ? Yes 
Strong ? Yes 

R.emington Typewriter Co* 
327 Broadway, New York 



T ^(c-j.-t. f^^^^a^iL^I . ^ ^ 



LIFE 







LIFE 




clogged with snow and the Elevated's 
third rail is iced— the resnlting chaos 
is unspeakable. As for the Brooklyn 
Bridge— it is best to say no more about 
it than that it does its best. 



♦• H'kile there is Life therms Hope:^ 

VOL. XLl. JAN. 1, ie08. No. 1063. 

10 Wbw Thirtt-Fibst St., New Tore. 




Pnbllshed evenr ThnradaT' t&OO a year In ad- 
▼auoe- Pofltaire to foreign conntrlee In the Postal 
Union, $1.04 a year extra, t^ln^le current cooles, 
to oenta. Back nombers, after tnree months from 
date of pubhcatlou. S6 cents. 

No contribution will be returned unless 
accompanied by stamped and addressed 
envelope. 

The illustrations in Life are copyrighted^ 
and are not to be reproduced. 

Prompt notification should be sent by sub- 
scribers of any change of address. 

pERSONS 
■*" not now 
residents of 
the City of 
New York 
or of any 
of ita sup- 
plementary 
districts, 
• who are 
considering 
the ezi)edi- 
enoy of 
cToming here 
tc> live, are b^^r^by besought, for 
their own sakes as well as out of re- 
gard for New York's present popula- 
tion, not to come for at least a year. 
Transient guests with money to spend 
are always welcome here, and we 
could stand perhaps a few more people 
of leisure with small families as resi- 
dents, but there are more working 
people here now, who live in Harlem 
and work below Fourteenth Street, 
than the resources of the town can ac- 
commodate. Life UDder existing con- 
ditions in New York is too strenuous. 
To get down town early in the mom« 
iug and back up town late in the after- 
noon, or to come from Brooklyn and 
return in what are called the " rush 
hours/' involves two life and death 
struggles a day. The elevated railroad 
has increased its capacity and bettered 
its service by using electricity ; the 
surface cars in good weather carry an 
amazing number of people ; but both 
together, under the best conditions, 
are overwhelmed by the demands that 
are made upon them. When the con- 
ditions are bad— when the streets are 




years at the rate of one every eighteen 
months, and it does not seem unlikely 
that a little outside pressure may 
prove wholesome to her. To throw an 
occasional fit is the reasonable privi- 
lege of a free country, but a condition 
of political epilepsy cannot exist in- 
definitely without consequences that 
invite treatment. 



OO do not move to New York this 
^ year, good friends, unless your 
business is pressing. In another year 
it will be better. Another bridge will 
connect Manhattan Island with the 
city of bedrooms. The tunnel will be 
finished to the relief of travel on the 
surface and in the air. Enough new 
hotels and apartment houses will be 
finished to shelter about a million 
more people, and folks who have the 
price of happiness about them will 
have a fair chance to be happy here. 
The improvement will not stop there. 
Many more bridges over the East 
River and a series of tunnels under 
both North and East Rivers will pres- 
ently give New York enough con* 
venient exits to empty the island at 
any time in the course of an hour. It 
is going to be so, presently, that you 
can go anywhere in ten minutes for 
five cents and arrive in health and 
with all your clothes on, but it will 
take a little more time to realize that, 
and meanwhile, for the moment, New 
York is swamped. 




S 



OME of the members of the 
Women's Ohristian Temperance 
Union have learned With lively con- 
cern that Watts' picture, ** Love and 
life," is to be hung in the dining- 
room of the remodeled White House. 
They are afraid that it will have an 
unfavorable effect on the morals of the 
country, because the fig^nres in it are 
nude. The picture has been in the 
Gorcoran Oallery for seven years, and 
the ladies want it sent back there. 
Their feeling is that if hardened peo- 
ple choose to go to picture galleries 
and run the risk of seeing nude pic- 
tures, it is nobody's fault but their 
own, but that the White House ought 
to set an example of expurgation to 
other American domiciles. It seems 
as if the W. C. T. U. ladies were 
almost too fussy about some things. 
The President in times past has shown 
a disposition to be master in his own 
dining-room, and probably he will be 
in this case. 




TTP to this writing there has been a 
^ creditable dearth of excitement 
about Venezuela. At last accounts 
our Minister at Caracas was the repre- 
sentative of the United States and 
most of Europe, and promised to be 
useful as a peacemaker. . Congress has 
continued fairly tranquil, Wall Street 
has had troubles of its own and has 
been disinclined to borrow more, and 
the general sentiment has been that 
our South American neighbor was 
going to acquire some valuable experi- 
ence without any agitating conse- 
quences to us. Heaven knows whether 
the Venezuelan mind is so constituted 
that experience of any sort can be 
profitable to it, but Venezuela has 
been having revolutions these many 



T^OCTOR LORENZ is the hardest 
~^ worked and most popular visitor 
we have had since Prince Henry came. 
He has worked his way across the coun- 
try, exciting great interest wherever 
he has gone, and putting children's 
hip bones in their sockets by the hun- 
dred. The medical profession every- 
where has received him with cordiali- 
ty, and paid the most flattering atten- 
tion to his operations. He has lavished 
his strength and skill on the cases 
brought to him and has done his best 
to make his methods clear to our sur- 
geons. He is a fine type of healer, 
- and however many American dollars 
he may happen to carry back with him, 
a grateful cheer will go with every 



•LIFE 







If Mil 



HANDS ,UP 1 

Identity. 

*• n^HAT man went out to the Philippines three 
-^ years ago a poor man, and he has come 

back with all kinds of money.'' 
** Saloonkeeper or missionary ? *' 

Life and Death. 

THE time is not far distant when physicians will know jnst 
how mnch sodiam chloride and how much oxygen and 
bow mnch of something else to inject into a deceased person's 
veins in order to restore him to ]ite,—The laUtt/rom ih€ Uni- 
vmrHty <tf Chicago. 

The words, "how mnch of something else/' do 
not imply that there is any nncertaiDty in this 
matter, or that secrets of importance yet remain 
to be wrested from Nature. They simply fill 
provisionally the gap in the formula reserved for 
the flavoring material, which necessarily varies 
with the individual, some preferring vanilla, 
others sarsaparilla, and still others strawberry. 

A Sure Thing. 

"DARKE : I predict that we will have the 
-*- worst cold snap this winter we have had 
lor years, with hard frost all over the country. 

LiANB : What makes you think that ? 

•• Well, I have just bought an orange grove in 
Florida.*' 




^/^/0K 



ANATOiyilCAU 
Ht : WHAT PART DO TOU ACT IH THS MEW PLAT t 
8h4 : THS LOWER HALF. 



LIFE 




The World: great batkllitm 1 anotbbr onf? 

*• YES, THE HIKETEBN HDNDBBD A»D THIRD." 




^laddin O'Brien^ by Gouverneur Morris, 
-^ is a delightful story. It is neither a 
pose nor a problem. It is bright, it is sin- 
cere, full of the joy of living, the love of 
man and the mystery of sorrow. Scene: 
New England and Gettysburg. Time: 
The Civil War. Characters: Men and 
women as God made them, imperfect but 
lovable. (The Century Company. $1.50.) 

We have had China served up to us in so 
many forms lately that we are heartily tired 
of the dish. The result is that even Pierre 
Ix>ti fails to quicken our jaded palates with 
his Last Days of Pekin. At some future 
time, when a new generation of romancers is 
ransacking our present and their past for 
local color, Loti*s letters from the seat of 
war will doubtless prove a treasure- trove. 
(Little, Brown and Company, Boston.) 

A critical volume, of interest to all stu- 
dents of Browning, to lovers of his work 
and to others willing to be taught, is Stop- 
ford A. Brooke's Tfie Poetry of Robert 
Browning. It is lucid, clear-eyed, apprecia- 



tive, and yet sane and temperate and free from 
the mawkish affectation which has changed 
Browning, a poet, into "Browning," a cult. 
(Thomas Y. Crowell and Company. $1.60.) 

Louise Forsslund is finding herself. The 
Ship of Dreams, her new study of Long 
Island coast characters, woven into a rather 
dramatic story, is a long stride in advance 
of her first novel. The Story of Sarah. She 
is striking to the field she knows and is im- 
proving her handling of it. (Harper and 
Brothers. $1.60.) f 

Josephine Dodge Daskam, on the other 
hand, does not duplicate the light touch 
and delicacy of the stories in The Madness 
of PJiiUip in her new collection called 
Whom the Oods Destroyed. There are good 
stories among the latter, and short story 
readers will enjoy the book, but they only 
amuse us, while the others left us the richer ~ 
in knowledge of that subtle and lovable 
thing, child nature. (Charles Scribner's 
Sons. $1.60.) -r 

Denslow*s Night Before Christmas is the 
best illustrated edition of this Christmas 
classic we have ever seen. It was in 1822 
that Moore wrote The Night Before Christ- 
mas. A San Francisco paper praises 




"JOHN, TOU*VE BEBK DRINKIMO AGAIN.'* 
'*XT DEAR, I'll swear I ONLY TOOK ENOUGH 
TO WET MT THROAT.** 



LIFE 



W. W. Denslow's pictares, and adds : " Clement C. Moore 
Aimiahes some amusing doggerel." Such is fame in 'Frisco ! 
(Q. W. Dillingham Company. $1.60.) «/. B, Ktrfoot. 

OTHER BOOKS RECEIVED. 

Tin Tan TaUt, By Qracla Kaason and E. Tschantrd, Jr. An 
amablng book for cblldren. (E. P. Datton and Company. $1.60.) 

Picture* qf Point-Box- Town. By Douglas Zabrlakle Doty. Out- 
line pictures with Terslfled instructions for coloring. (E. P. Dn^ 
ton and Company. $1 00.) 

Thelma. By Ifarle Corelli. (R. F. Fenno and Company.) 

Th« Lani That Had No Turning. By QUbert Parker. (Double- 
day, Page and Company. $1.50 ) 

A ffarvard Alphabtl, (The Harvard Co-operaUve Society, 
Oambridge.) 

New Year Resolutions. 

k O l)4>rrijw more money than trouble, 
'To i^ivo more advice than help, 
To bejLf patiently my neighbor's suffering, 
Aud ta be courageous in his defeats ; 
To sit quietly while others stand, 
To drink while others thirst, and to eat while 
othera starve, 
In short, to live along the lines of least resistance, and die 

comfortably, 
This IB my symphony. 

A, PorUy Hogg, 






Uhde Samuel: san hsbs, touko fsllow, i*ll pbotect toitr pbopbbtt, but i want 
Ton to distinctlt undsbstahd that this place is mot a aapuoB fob opfbndxbs 

AOAIHST UNIVBBSAL LAW AMD OBDBH. 



JUDGE 



— , of Boston, who is 
a great fisherman, for some 
years past had been in the habit of 
bringing back from Newfoundland, 
the scene of his piscatorial labors, 
such marvelous stories of his catches 
that his friends grew more and 
more skeptical. The Judge, in order 
to remove all doubts about his hon- 
esty, finally procured a set of spe- 



8UBBLT TBB UOMOBABLB JOB OBAMBXBLAIM DXSBBVBD BIS WABX WZLOOMS 
IK SOtTTH AFBICA. HE HAS I>OMB XOBX FOB TBB UMDBBTAKXBS AMD TUX OBAVX- 
STOMB CUTTXR8 OF OBBaT BBITAIN TBAM AMY OTHXB BIMGLB INDIVIDUAL. 

The Dying: Calendar. 

X TURN its lessening pages with a sigh. 
-*- Life's Calendar — Tis running out so fast, 
Cold January — Tropical July. 
They all have gone and now there come the 

last— 
Those months, three-syllabled, which tell the end 

is near, 
When one sighs soft and ofl — another waning 

year I 



Yet on those dozen leaves I note the theme, 

Tho' ever varied, ever is the same — 
Love Frustntte— Love in Triumph — Love Su- 
preme — 
Love's Quarrels, Kisses, Raptures, Praise and 
Blame- 
Love in the Rain — the Snow — in Youth and 

Age— 
'Tis Love — Love — Love illumines each glowing 
page. 

Oh, Sorceress— who sets the year a-speedingi 
Undying is the text your page inspires. 

The Voice that breathed o'er Eden still is plead- 
ing 

In tones of which this old world never tires. 

And tho' the winter months draw on apace, 

Life's daily leaf we turn with better grace, 

Because within our hearts there runs tha 
rune: 

*' Love does not end with Roses and with June." 

Sarah 8. PraU. * 



cial scales and triumphantly 
weighed all the fish he caught, and 
for his friends' inspection kept the 
record thus accurately made. 

Recently, while the Judge was 
away from home, there was an ad- 
dition to his family. 

The Judge's scales were used, 
and they recorded the baby's weight 
as f orty-eight poinds. 



LIFE- 




OtpjtrfaHtr flNM, Av r<if/* r»tM«*fw^ C^ 



DESSERT. 



LIFE 




RCGOT 8 CHRISTMAS PRESENT. 



LI 




III " " 








€tptH8l^* f9m. If Mf 




XIAL PUSH. 



12 



LIFE 




T 1 I * I J 



DRAMii 





Sentiment and Reminiscence. 

;^EXTIMEXT, German sentiment, that is to say, sen- 
timent of the thick, sticky kind, is the motive of 
*' Heidelberg " at the Princess Theatre. It is a sort of 
glorification of puppy love and shows the seriousness with 
wluih the <"Jt^mj«n siiuiii'iit and the German author, 
jireNuuuM'ly one time a student himself, 
Tvgurd these preliminary can- 
ti f A In the world of love. Per- 
<^ the old-time proverb about 
t}M iack of smoothness in the 
U'oiirse of love had its founda- 
tUm in these immature affairs. 
^^m^ "-^r-c-^r-^^BM ^ They are from their very nature 

r*(^^^^ta^^3 ™*'*°'^ susceptible to the vicissi- 

A^^^^^HK tude« of fortune than the later episodes 
^^^^^^^^^L \ihirh tma^ with maturer years and 
^^^^^^^^^^ umr*' fnrvdfvm and independence of out- 
^^^^^^^^^ tfjd<? eonrntl on the part of those en- 
^^^^ ^^^^ gagtd III ihtm. Certainly the course of 

^^H^^^^ true love in the case of Karl Heinrich, 

Heir Apparent to tfie Throne of Sachsen 
Karlshfjtrg, and Katie, the belle of the Heidelberg inn, ran very far 
from smooth. In fact, it ends in a love catastrophe artiMtic in it- 
self but saddening to those who insist that all plays shall end hap- 
pily. Fortunately, though, this love was only puppy love, and its 
spectators may console themselves that, sweet as it was, it was 
probably soon over and that the subsequent marriages of both par- 
ties to the affair were founded on a more rational and sensible 
basis. This may seem a practical and stony-hearted view to take 
of what is really a very pretty little love story, but it is advanced 
for the benefit of those cultured play-goers who insist that all 
romance must be on the same popular basis as the Duchess's 
novels, with wedding bells and rice at the end. 

The hero of the piece — impersonated by Aubrey Boucieault, 
who also adapted the play from the German of Wilhelm Mayer- 
Forster — is a sort of modified Reichstadt, compelled by state reasons 
to be reared in seclusion. Part of his education for the throne, 
however, involves a sojourn at the university, and at Heidelberg 
he falls in love with Katie, the niece of the womdn who keeps an 
inn M hich the students frequent. Here the glimpse into the corps- 
life of the German student is entertaining and must be the principal 
reliance for whatever success the play is to have, as the story stops 
with KarVt sudden elevation to the throne and his^eturn for a brief 
farewell to his fellow-students and Katie. The melancholy interest 
naturally centres in Karl, for his lot is to marry a presumably 
uninteresting German princess, while Katie may be pictured as later 
on a contented haits-frau surrounded by a brood of sausage-eating 
youngsters. Mr. Boucieault, in looks, is picturesque and interesting 
and does his work intelligently, but lacks a certain element of 
earnestness which would gain the character a deeper sympathy. 
Miss Dupree is dainty and pretty as Katie, which is about all the 
part exacts. The real German atmosphere is supplied, so far as the 




smallness of the part allows, by Herr Max Freeman as Dr, JftUner 
and Ja wofU! he is a German professor, gewist I 

" Heidelberg " is a trifle, but it is pretty and woKh seeing. 
• • • 

|E graybeards who remember the days of 
the Rebellion will find considerable to inter- 
est and amuse in " When Johnny Comes 
Marching Home." Even the title brings 
back moments when that song roused seri- 
ous doubts as to whether Johnny ever would 
come marching home or not. These were the 
days when Godey's Ladie$' Book was the 
standard of fashion for the American women, when patriotic songs 
of the ** Tramp, tramp, tramp " order were evolved at short inter- 
vals and became immensely popular, when the Momen in their big 
hoop-skirts, poke bonnets and small parasols were, if possible, 
more ridiculously dressed even than at present, when the young 
women were eut^ged in fairs for the Sanitary Commission and in 
making things for the absent soldier boys, and when the 
best blood of the country was flowing in torrents for tlie saving of 
the Union. Mr. Stang6 and Mr. Edwards have embodied some of 
these things in what they term a ** Spectacular Military Opera." 
Probably Mr. Stang^'s original intention was a more or less serious 
one, but the result is an out-and-out musical comedy. The lines 
which he meant to be spoken seriously are so mock-heroic that they 
have properly been taken to be burlesque and are so rendered. The 
would-be serious situations are also so primitive that the onlj way 
to treat them is to play them farcically — which is done. Th® 
climax of the first act is really impressive, showing a continuous 
stream of marching soldiers in the background, and in front 
Union ofiUcers and Confederate girls singing a medley of war songs. 
The chorus girls and principal women are in the ample hoop-skirts 
of the time, and raise the problem of what on earth would ever be- 
come of New York's present broken-down transportation system if 
those hoop-skirts should come in fashion again. 

The company is fairly competent. Miss Lucille Saunders and 
Mr. Wm. G. Stewart are entirely up to the not heavy requirements 
laid on them in their musical numbers. The heroine is sung by 
Miss Zetti Kennedy, and one cannot help wondering any more 
where she got her remarkable name than where the management 
got her. She has a pair of laughing eyes and a set of dazzling 
teeth kept constantly in evidence with absolute confidence that the 
audience must be pleased with them. In her singing she indulges 
in a wealth and kind of gesture which shows that the East St. 
Ix»uis Conservatory of Music would be only too proud to claim her 
as a graduate. The music is interesting. One song, "Kate, My 
Southern Rose," is very catching. The piece is worth sitting 
through. Metcalfe, 

LIFE'S CONFIDENTIAL GUIDE TO THE THEATRES. 

Academy of J/t/«V —"The Ninety and Nine." Spectacular melodrama 
based on Sankey's hymn. 

liela*co.^"1he Darling of the Gods.'* Powerful play, splendidly staged 
and acted. 

Broadtcat/.—''The Sliver Slipper/' Moderately good musical comedy. 

Casino.—" The Chinese Honeymoon.** AmuHlug musical comedy . 

7>a^y>.— Last week of "A Country Olrl." Best of the musical comedies. 

J'^njhrf.—*' Imprudence." Clever comedy, fairly well done. 

Garde n.-Soxhem in " Hamlet.'' Well acted. 

GarHck.^HAry Mannerlng In "The Stubl>ornness of Geraldlne.' Light 
and amusing comedy 

Herald iSquare.—Mr, Mansfield's production of '* Julius Csesar.' Well 
done. 

Knickerbocker.— Ur. Goodwin and Miss Elliott In "The Altar of 
Friendship/' Pleasing little play, well acted. 

MadiMOh .sv^or^—** Audrey." The novel in dramatic form. Not much. 

Manhattan.—" Mary of Magdala," with Mrs. Flske In the title part. In- 
teresting. 

Neto York.—*' When Johnny Comes Marching Home " See above. 

PHwc^M.— " Heidelijerg." See above. 

Savoy.—'* The Girl with the Green Ejes." Notice later. 

Victoria.—'' The Eternal City.*' Hall Calne dramatized. 

Wallack^s.-" The SiUtan of Sulu. " Notice later. 

W€t>er and /^/</«'«.~Vaudevllie and burlesque. Expensive. 



LIFE 



13 




WHT MOT ADTBBTISB TUB 8BM8ATIONAI. NOTBL IK A SENSATIONAL WAT? 



Christianity. 

SOME hare nUd that the Bible had better 
bare gone to the Islands before the bullet, 
but I feel that the bnllet was necessary.— J?«v. 
C, W. Brigga, BaptUt missionary in the PhUip- 
pines. 

The Bible proposes Christiaxiity la 
the abstract, as we may say. The 
bnllet, on the other hand, is concrete. 

The concrete always appeals morti 
X)owerfnlly to simple minds, psycholo- 
gists assure ns, and it is quite con- 
ceivable that the Filipinos are 
given a truer insight into our 
religion by being shot at than by 
being preached to. 

Suited Them Better. 
-piRST YOUTH: That was 
-*- a great tragedy, wasn't 
it ? Did you take your parents 
to see it? 

Second Youth: Oh, no! 
They are too old for that 
sort of thing. They went to a 
farce comedy. 



IVyf AN is the only animal that 
■^-^ works the other animals 
for a living. 



OLIMSON : Well, Willie, what have 
^ you to say to this fine turkey ? 

Willis : I was thinking that he 
laughs best who gobbles last. 

Baseball Note. 
TT is said that Jerome is a good 
-^ catcher, but we do not think he 
Can-field. 



•• ^VyfAMMA, what kind of flowers 
-^ "^ do they have in heaven ? '* 
**0h, morning-glories and forget- 
me-nots.'' 



"VrO matter how smoothly the mar- 
•**^^ riage ceremony may proceed, 
there's bound to be a hitch in it. 




Mrs. Portly Jowl: now, unclb hatrick, don't tou think mauds's new oown is a triitxph in dbxumakimo? 
UncU Hayrick : BiroBE oivino an opinion i shall be obuged to look undeb the table. 



14 



LIFE 




MORS THAN BUMOB. 




New York and the New Year. 

EW YORK stood sulkUy pnU- 
ing on his gloves, as he waited 
to greet the New Year. The 
rather bored expression on his 
face changed to interest, and then to 
delight, when her radiant figure tim- 
idly advanced. 

** This is a bewildering surprise," he 
mnrmored, pressing his lips to her 
finger-tips. "I fancied yon were a 
brat of a boy." 

" A boy was expected," she replied 
diffidently; "bnt I happen to be a 
girl." Then, hnrriedly: *•! am so 
glad yon met me. I am snre yon 
are going to protect my youth and 
innocence, are you not ? " 

** Assuredly," returned New York 
paternally. "From all, save myself. 
In the first place, you must refuse to 
even meet Chicago. It would com- 
promise you terribly to do so. Trust 
yourself implicitly to me." 

" You are very wise, are you not? ** 
appealingly. 

"H'm. Very knowing, at least. 
But yon are charming. Do you think 
you can be happy in my home ? " 

*'I don't know," said 1908. a little 
dubiously, lifting a white satin slipper 
covered with mud, and holding up her 



filmy skirts flecked with soot. ** Your 
house is so dirty, and your servants 
are so noisy and quarrelsome." 

"But couldn't you learn to love 
mef* questioned New York eagerly, 
ardently. "I am a very peculiar 
nature, and had I met a woman like 
you earlier. Heaven knows, things 
might have been different. Let me 
tell you the story of my life." 

" Oh, no, no I " cried the New Year, 
putting her hands up before her face. 
" Mamma made me promise not to 
listen to that. Even to an expurgated 
edition. But," blushing prettily, and 
looking up in his face with an ex- 
pression of Ethel- Barry more naivete ^ 
*• I do not think it would be very hard 
to learn to love you. You are so mag- 
nificent and splendid, so amusing and 
gay, that you dazzle me. Still, you 
and your big house frighten me dread- 
fully." 

"Frighten you, my child? And 
why?" 

" Oh, they say you have a pet tiger 
roaming about loose." 

" Tammany ? Why, dear, old Tam- 
many is gentle as a kitten. " 

" Ah, but you also have fierce dogs, 
who are always baying at the moon, 
or at the sun, or— or — " 

" Any old thing," finished her host. 
"Jerome and Parkhurst, eh? Dear 



child, they merely amuse themselves 
barking. I assure you, they are quite 
pets." 

" But you are very cruel sometimes. 
You turned my grandmother, *78, out 
into the streets without a i)enny." 

" Merely to give Mr. Pinero an idea 
for his problem play of • Iris '," re- 
marked New York parenthetically. 

"And you made my cousin, '94, a 
hissing and a byword through the 
land; and you allowed all sorts ot 
attempts to be made on the life of my 
dear sister, 1902. Those devil-machines, 
which you call automobiles, strove to 
run her down ; rocks were hurled at 
her from the subway; she was sub- 
jected to terrible explosions, wrecked 
in tunnel disasters, and nearly burned 
to death in appalling fires." 

" I grant you that my servants were 
careless in their treatment of your 
sister ; but, adorable 1903, you are 
withholding your answer. You will 
not let my past militate against 
me?" 

" If I were quite sure that you are 
you," she murmured coyly. " In all 
your portraits you wear Colonial cos- 
tume, square-toed shoes, a white wig, 
and have a long pipe in your mouth. 
But, on meeting you, I find you are 
very smart, very modem." 

" I have merely adapted my costume 



LIFE 




15 

to the times,** he said smilingly, encircliDg her with 
lii(* arm. *'Ihave even changed my coat of arms 
to on 13 more appropriate.** 
*' The beaver and the windmill? ** she questioned. 
" The beaver and the windmill no longer,'* he an- 
swered. '*The arms of New York is 
now a Jew, a cocktail, and a peroxide 
blonde against a field of gold.** 

Mrs, WiUon Woodrow. 

Classes. 

n^HE middle class are an ex- 
-^ tremely important and 
useful class. They are often 
spoken of, not unjustly, as the 
great middle class. 

It is from the middle class 
that the indispensable upper 
class are recruited. For. the 
middle class not only amass the 
money, but they beget the 
fools to i)art with the same, 
also. 

Art would doubtless fare but 
meagrely without the middle 
class. The lower class are too 
poor to patronize art much, 
and the upper class really 
have some judgment in those mat> 
ters. 

The middle class neglect their civic 
duties, and this makes business brisk 
for the reformers, many of the wor- 
thiest of whom woxdd otherwise have 
to go to work. 

The women of the middle class are 
ashamed of their men-folks. Thus 
they contribute in no small measure to 
the creation of a correct popular taste. 

"ORIGGS: Well, the next thing 
-*-^ J. Pierpont Morgan will 
own the solar system. 

Griggs : Why, he already con- 
trols The Sun. 




'ffe-ot 



*' WA8H> THSBB ANT TIXB WHILB TOU WJBB MAKINQ LOTS TO MB. DBAB, TBAT TOU WBBB 
BXBARRASBEDf '* 

*• OH. TBI I JUST ABOUT THB TIMB WHBN I WAS GBTTIMO THAT UNCI.*' 






o 



OH, TLtTTTBBINO HBART, BIT STILL I 



LIFE 




TJ^^AvTMM 




Cardiff, Wales, has just started a new electric 
railway service. A number of by-laws have been 
framed by the corporation for the regulation of the 
traffic and passengers, and this is how they are 
summed up in rhyme: 

Thou Shalt not use cuss words or swear, 

Or play sweet music on the air 

Or give out tracts or ask for alms, 

Give way to cards or such like charms. 

When drunk thou shalt in nowise ride ; 

No dog or beast shall with thee bide. 

Thou Shalt not cut or scratch thy name. 

Defile the car, deface the same. 

Thou Shalt not smoke, thou shalt not spit. 

No antics, mind, but merely sit. 

Don't try to boss or interfere. 

Or show the driver how to steer. 

Just sit you down and take your rest — 

The men must know their business best. 

And keep your hands oft curious things, 

The trolley rope, the bell that rings. 

Upon or off a moving car 

Thou shalt not jump, so friend, beware. 

Nor carry gun or dangerous thing. 

Nor with disease that risk may bring. 

Pay up. nor grumble at the fare, 

Before you quit or leave the car. 

Such is the law, don't say It nay; 

There's fines for those who don't obey! 

— Western Mail. 

To HAVE helped a great man on his way is 
something to remember. A Chicago paper says of 
one Western Senator that he takes pride in never 
saying more than "yes" or "no" to newspaper men. 

One day a correspondent Interviewed him with 
the usual result, and ended by asking: 

"What is the largest city in South Dakota?" 

The Senator looked his surprise, but replied 
courteously : 

"Sioux Falls." 

The reporter, bowed and took his leave. A few 
moments later he met a friend, and said to him : 

"I've beaten all you fellows. I've just added 
the words 'Sioux Falls' to Senator 's vocabu- 
lary." — youth's Companion. 



One useful element of a literary style is sug- 
gestion. The author does not tell a laborious story. 
He presents a picture in as few words as possible, 
allowing the reader to fill in the details for himself. 
This was the unconscious method of little Margaret, 
who had had a present of some sugared almonds, 
and was laboring under an impulse of generosity. 

"Aunty," said she, "don't you want some of my 
almonds?" 

"Thank you, dear," was the prompt reply, "I 
will take one or two. Sugared almonds are favor- 
ites of mine." 

"Well, which is the most favorites, the pink ones 
or the white ones?" 

"I will take the white ones, please; that is, if 
you don't mind." 

"That'll be just right, aunty. Tou take the 
white ones, and I will keep the pink ones. They 
were all pink at first." — Philadelphia Telegraph. 

Mb. C. Brookfield, in his very readable "Rem- 
iniscences," tells the Etory, which he fathers on 
Lord Hardwicke, of how Poole, the tailor, went to a 
fashionable entertainment at a large country house, 
and on being asked next day how he had got on, 
replied : 

"Very well ; but the company was rather mixed." 

"You surely did not expect all of them to be 
tailors?" was the reply. 

The story is not told as original, and the 
Standard has had a lot of serious correspondence 
about it which is of a laughable character.^ — Sport- 
ing Times. 

I 

General "Phil" Sheridan was at one time 
asked at what little Incident did he laugh the most. 

"Well," he said, "I do not know, but I always 
laugh when I think of the Irishman and the army 
mule. I was riding down the line one day, when 
I saw an Irishman mounted on a mule which wa» 
kicking its legs rathar freely. The mule finally got 
its hoof caught in the stirrup, when, in the ex- 
citement, the Irishman remarked: 'Well, begorrah, 
if you're goln' to get on, I'll get off !' " — New York 
Tribune. 



The country editor had turned the personal col- 
umn over to his daughter temporarily, while poli- 
tics claimed his attention. 

The daughter had studied country editorial meth- 
ods to some advantage, and the following items ap- 
peared : 

"Tom Jones called last evening with a two- 
pound box of candy. Call again, Tom." 

"Harry Mason was around with his trotter aad 
sidebar buggy last week. Don't forget the number. 
Harry." 

"George Brown's billboard is said to be good for 
two seats for anything that comes. We always 
like to see Goorge on show nights." 

"Miss Mary Martin, the milliner, has a mag- 
nificent display of the latest styles in her show 
window. How much Is this good for, Mary?" — 
Chicago Post. 



^ Dr. William Byron Forrush, pastor of the 
Winthrop Church, Boston, told a little story to 
illustrate the nature of a boy's ambitions at the 
"Congress About Boys" which recently met in this 
city. He said a gentleman in Springfield, Mass.. 
met a boy walking on the shores of Massasoit 
Lake. He was such a bright, manly little fellow 
that the man could not forbear stopping to talk 
with him. After some conversation he asked him 
how old he was. The little chap appeared confused, 
hesitated, and finally replied: 

"Well, I ain't but twelve, but my pants is 
marked sixteen." — New York Times. 



And it came to pass that the Sluggard, after con- 
sulting the Sage from Sageville, heeded his advice 
and went to the Ant for the purpose of acquiring a 
job lot of wi3dom. But when he finally arrived at 
the hill where the Ant toiled eighteen hours daily, 
he discovered a half-starved Ant-eater making a 
one-course dinner of the Ant colony. 

"Verily," remarked the Sluggard to himself, as 
he turned away in disgust, "if that is the reward of 
industry, I shall continue to slug as heretofore." — 
Chicago News. 



Life is for sale by all Newsdealers in Great Britain. The International News 
Company. Bream^s Bailding, Chancery Lane, London, E. C, England, Agents. 



Established 1823. 

WILSON 

WHISKEY. 

That's All! 

THE WILSON DISTILLING CO., 
Baltimore, Md. 



CHESTER CREST, 

North Poarth Avenue, Mount Vernon, New York. 

A quiet resort with every oomfort, for men nervously disordered through disslpa' 
tion. Communications strictly confidentiaL Address O. S. Avery, Manager. Tele- 
phone— 445 A. Mount Yemon. 



GILBERT HEADS 




OD|^jr<jM^^»'. DORIS 

75c. EACH 
LIFE PUBLISHING CO. 

19 AND 21 West 31ST Strbkt . . New York 






-Tiic NAME IS evavniiNa* 

Esterbrook 

on a pen is an absolute 
marantee of Its excellence 



Inflexiblel 
Accountant's 
and Firm 
Over 150 
other styles 
every pu 
stationers 
Accept no 




|Na322. An 
Pen. Fine 
|P o i n t 8 . 
varieties of 
it o suit 
ose. All 
'have them, 
substitute. 



THE Esterbrook SiEa veh ca 



St Perfect BLOCK SIGNALS on THE NEW YORK CENTRAL 



LIFE 



ABOUT 75% or THE MEN 

In mercantile and professional life 
owe eomething of their succesa to 
personal appearance. The leisure 
class owes still more to the same 
cause. T he few genuine geniuses 
succeed io spite of it. Personal 
appearance is largely a matter of 
dress. Dress Is largely a matter 
of the Cravat. This was under- 
stood by some as far back •3 the 
days of Bean Brummel, but It Is 
only the later section of the pros 
ent generation of men who have 
fully grasped it. The well- 
groomed man of to-day tOvenwhen 
he must economise on other arti- 
cles of apparel, buys ten Cravats 
where his daddy bought one. 

There is a jj^p&f^ text book 
called »*TiiE Cravat." It tells 
of the What, Where, When and How of a Man's Cravat 
—Its Names and shapes, Its Tying, Its Care, Its Selec- 
tion, Its Various Forms for Special Occasions and Func- 
tions, Its Color Scheme, Its Adjuncts : I'ins, Fasteners, 
Etc., Its Doni's, in fact, 

All About A Man's Cravat. 
It is profusely and sumptuously illustrated by one of 
the foremost sutlsts of Amerlda. The first edition cost 
tiM publishers over $15,000, but yon can have a copy for 
the aslclng, by sending this Adv*t with your address and 
6 cents In sUnps to the Publisher, James R. Kelser, 122- 
1 24 Fifth Avonne, New York. If you prefer a bound copy, 
de Laze odlttoo* send 15 oeato in 




only 
MINERAL WATERS sold in America to-day. 

CARBONIC, ARTIFICIAL VICHY, 
SBLTCRS, CLUB SODA, Etc., 

are also pat up in bottles for oat of town 
delirery, and oan be sent by freisbt or 
ezDresa to any part of the United States. 
Orders to 

CARL H. SCHULTZ 

Tel 142 Madison Sq. 4a(M44 First Ato., N. Y. 



WILEY'S 



WAiSENE 



f^WBTONLY PREPARATIOH 
I HADE EXPRESSLY FOR 

'K ixeHEisr 

Fr.OORS 



i.i'-i iy it yuurielt. It prcflf rrps tJie wdckV 

room rlwD, »»««t,ui(l bejiltbruf. \\ >| \ t^N 11 U 
1 Qoi LWfU, w»flb up ro^ulftb^ but aiiftKirflf afivr 1 
Lirrp«.rtiloti. -tlie on ly th I n g^ t n ttt*» « o r Ul ! li at wli 1 1 
^^fert^Dtft dour ri^Qm pnuuinK^ eobrlittf or ^oltt]niK\ 

■Tt'VK IT. £«i[H>rlB|lT AttftfitC^i for LlniiLt'unkn alkLl 
OaclotMinrt tilt b.attH HIT mad* for .A LI, HARD- ^ 
WOOI> FUKJiifl, &nld by pdlnt. barcJwiire. Krucery, 

in*lj FR eh;. S*fti [| f M r free d --irr U -t ivt Iwjuk I tt . 
r. n, WILKY d£ to., Mfrs.. 





Bicycle 

S^ Playing 
[^ Cards are 
Favorites 
the world 
over. 



When you play with "Bicycle" 
Playing Cards you Hold Good 
Cards. Sold by dealers. Popular 
price. 29 backs. Order by name. 
Design shown is "Locon^obile." 
Copyrighted, 1900, by 

The U. S. Playing Card Co. 
Cincinnati, U. S. A. 



Guaranty Trust Company of New York 

MUTUAL LIFE BUILDING, NASSAU, CORNER CEDAR STREET. 

LONI>ON OPPICKR 33 LOMBARD STREET, E. C. «0 ST. JAMES STREET, 8. W. 

Fiscal Agents of the United States Government. Manila. Phtllpplne Islands, Hong Kong, Cblna. Depository of the 

Government of the Philippine Islands, Manila 

Capital, $2,000,000. Surplus and Undivided Profits, $5,180,000. 

INTEREST ALLOWED ON DEPOSITS sahject to cheque or on certificate. 

Acts as Trustee for Corporations. Firms and Individuals: and as Guardian. Executor and Administrator: Takes entire 

charge of Real and Personal Estates : carefully selected securiries offered for investment. 

TRAVELERS' LETTERS OP CREDIT Available in all parts of tbe world. 

_ roiTiiriERriAL letters op credit issued. 

DRAPTS on aU parts of Great Britain, France, Germany, Cblna, and Philippines BOUGHT and SOLD. 
WALTER G. OAKMAN, President. ADRIAN FSELIN. JR , Vice President. 

GEORGE R. TURN BULL. 2d Vice-President. HENRY A. MURRAY. 3d Vice-President. 

WM. C. EDWARDS. Treasurer. JOHN GAULT. Manager Foreign Deparonent. 

E. 0. HEBBARD. Secretary. F. C. HARRIMAN, Assistant Treasurer. 

R. C. NEWTON, Trust Officer. 
DIRECTORS: 
George F. Baker. O. G. Haven. Augustus D. Jullllard, 

George S. Bowdoin. £. H. Uarriman. James N. Jarvie. 

August Belmont, R. Somers Hayes. Richard A. McCurdy, 

Frederic^ CromweU, Charles R. Henderson. Levi P. Morton. 

Alexander E. Orr, 



Walter R. GUlette, 



Adrian iselln. jr., 



Walter G. Oakman, 
Henry H. Rogers, 
H. McK. Twombly, 
Frederick W. Vanderbllt, 
Harry Payne Whitney. 



London ComnUttees ARTHUR J. FRASER. Chairman; DONALD C. HALDEMAN. 



^ 



• Lll^C- 




>oa fooLlSH 

iNTEMPO 



EXPERT OPINION. 
Like a port sculler one physician plies, 
And all his art and all his skill he tries ; 
But two physicians, like a pair of oars, 
Conduct you faster to the Stygian shores. 

— New York Medical Journal. 

For convenience, really superior hotel service 
for select patronage, and climate, there is nothing 
for New Yorkers quite like Lakewood, New Jersey. 
Laurel House. 
Laurel-in -THE-PiNBS. 

Chabitt covers a multitude of skins. — School- 
master. 

Boston breathes deep in patriotism and culture 
as will be recognised from the following examina- 
tion in geography in one of her public schools : 

Teacher: Have you ever heard of the "happy 
isles of Greece"? 

Little Waldo: Tes, ma'am. 

Teacher: Can you tell me something about 
them? 

LiTTLB Waldo : They are pieces of pork entire- 
ly surrounded by beans. — Schoolmaster. 

CHABMiNO place— Old Point Comfort, Va. Chamberlin 
open for the seMon. Send for booklet. 



"Of course," said the youth who was in love, 
"two can live as cheaply as one." 

"Perhaps," replied his wise father, "but I never 
knew ihem to do It." — Chicoffo Evening Poet. 

"Thunder and guns !" exclaimed the old gentle- 
man, as he was given the bill for his only daugh- 
ter's last gown, "but you cost a pile of money!" 

"Well, papa," she replied, demurely, "if you 
wouldn't sit in the back parlor with the door open 
when I am enterUining Mr. Binkley in the front 
parlor, you'd stand a better chance of getting rid of 
the expense." — Chicago Evening Poet. 

HOTEL VENDOME, BOSTON. 
All the attractions of hotel life, with the com- 
forts and privacy of home. 

"And now," said Professor Longhunger, as he 
greeted Mr. Henry Peck, "what shall we make of 
your little boy — a lecturer? He has a sincere taste 
for it." 

"I know he has," replied the male parent; "he 
Inherits it from his mother." — Schoolvtaster. 

ELeCTRlC-LIGHTLD TRAIN TO CALIFORNIA. 
The "Overland Limited" via Chicago and North- 
western, Union Pacific, and Southern Pacific Rail- 
ways, has electric reading lamps in every berth ; 
long distance telephone service, buffet-library cars 
(with barber and bath), compartment observation 
cars, and dining cars. All agents sell tickets via 
tbii« route. 

Patient: Tou mean to say that it is to you 
that I am wholly indebted for my cure? 

Doctor: I consider myself the instrument in 
the hands of Providence. 

Patient: Or, rather, the middleman — the party 
who usually gets the profits. — Boston Transcript. 

Kentucky Teacher (of infant geography class): 
Tommy Blood may tell us what a strait is. 

ToMMT Blood : It's Jis' th' plain stuff 'thout 
— ♦»-«n' In it. — Ohio State Journal. 





MILWAUKEE^ 

LARGEST BREWERS 

Over One Million Barrels 

of Schlitz Beer Sold in One Year 



This makes us, by over 
one hundred thousand barrels, 
Milwaukee's largest brewers, 
and Milwaukee, as you know, is 
the most renowned brewing 
center in the world. 

TMs is How It Was Done 



For fifty years we have doubled 
the necessary cost of our brew- 
ing that Schlitz Beer might be pure. 

We cool Schlitz Beer in plate 

glass rooms, and all the air that 

touches it comes through filters. 



We age our beer for months before 
we market it. That is why Schlitz 
Beer doesn't cause biliousness. 

We filter Schlitz Beer through 
wonderful filt{_Ts, then sterilize 
every bottle after it is sealed. 



The Beer that Made Milwaukee famous 



ABBOTT'S omciNAiANCOSTURABlTTERS 



OLD CROW RYE 



STRAIGHT 



WHISKEY 



H. B. KIRK & CO., Sole Bottlers, New York. 



LIFE 




THE RARE, PIQUANT FLAVOR OF 

Chartreuse 

— QREEN AND YELLOW - 



MAKES IT THE DAINTIEST 
AND MOST DELICIOUS OF 
ALL CORDIALS 

ii*"*-*'*** ^l""* Mw^;hMni,^ Ort.Pfr». Hotel*, Cmlht. 

uatjer ^ Co*. 4 J Broadway, New York, NY*. 

Sole Ageuiafot United Suiei 




" Ifiifloina Old Branilv made froaWlna." 

^Mftlkai Prtm iLandonYy Aug, iim, 

MARTELL'S 
THREE STAR 
BRANDY 

AT ALL BARS AND RESTAURANTS. 



/^^ 






If you're a. Judge 




of Champa^gne and 




have not trJ«d 



Oceans of 
Sunshine 

Acres of roses and miles of palms 
—that's Californiri in midwmter. 
Gather flowers and pick oranijes* 

Reached on a high -class trajn— 
The C&Ufornia Limited. 

Chicagro to California in less than 
three days. Wh y e nd u re disa gree- 
ab!e weather at home ? 

The CalEfoTnl* tour dcjicribed m our 
OcneTBl J^sftengrf Office, Atchimn.Topclti 



Veuve Qicquot 



You hci^ve ftv 
unique experience 
comings "^ ^ X 




Rae's Lucca 

Olive Oil 

appreciated by connoisseurs 

fur its 

0«licate Flavor 

iXo rank smetl nor Taste, #0 frequent m 
»oia(i brands u toil ve Oilj 

Ouannteed Pur« Oil o* Oilvci 
- . * tinl^ » . * 

U S. R,AE & CO. 

LEGHORN, ITALY 



Santa Fe 




The Highest T/pe of French Champagne 
CODMAN & HALL CO. 

^gtnt$for the U. S 
BOSTON. f^ASS, 



m^ 



SHAVING 



The lather of Williams' Shaving 
Stick acts like ricli cream to 
the hot or irritated lace- It i^ 
soothing, corn fort ing-, re- 
freshing, and aiuiseptic, 
and makes shaving reallv 
enjoyable. 









LIFE 




5f^ t^hS w e s t indies 



An hlmL frpflt in wht^h to ppcTtcl it wliucr^ 
VACotJpn aiHi avoid *ll tin? e^trtrot* at ihe 

UNITED FRUIT CO/S 
STEAMSHIP LINES 

nperafe weekly b^tT^wn BOSTON wia rHIt.- 
AiJBLPHiA And JAMAICA* the ninKniflC^rit 
twin icftiw tl B. MiiU BtewnJilltp*! 



Adoilr*! newejr 
Ad mini ^hlr> 



Admiral 3«fnpjon 
AdOiJrml Farrafiit 



Fsirf ^ir ronnd trlr*, !t!cIodtnE stnrenjom acoom- 
dumU lions and mi^ih, S75; "'J*? wiiy, *iO» 

S«»4 Atr ftar lH!«iiUfta] lMiokl«t w bat her T0a««9t«B> 
plftt« th« trip or uot 

UNITED FRUIT COMPANY 




■^iortii Wliarve*. 
IlLA, 



Lofig Wharf, 
BOSTON 



Cril6 taste convinces 

KORN-KRISP 

Leads them all 



KitchenUtensiU 

K AVI KG THIS 

TRADE MARK 




ARE SAFE. 



NO POISON 

UiiM E^er Bf?cn Found Ln 

Agate Nickcl- 

Stecl Ware. 
The BLUE LABEL 

lYotfit'tjeNt liv I»ici!iksin?f 
rtiHt^i SraJU^fl Csmrt, j>Mted 

PROVES IT, 

If (fUbittltiitt'-. iLrc fjfffJ^H 

hy the Iwidtnar iHT.RTtiiiLiil 
nod bauK-rnniliihtnir Stoiu^ 

l^lArw-n A drOEjWQ Mtft. Ox* 



G0U1 & RHEUMATISWI 



Dmc^ Great En£rll8h Rfim&dy 

BLAIR'S PILLS 

SafBfSvratCffecthne. 50a A St. 



Mm 




If always of uniform excelJcnct. U never 
departs from tti high quality. It Is a dry 
Champagrrt with a dcn^htfuJ bouquet, 
madt of the pure |uSc« of ^rapcj* natur- 
ally fcrmcnleiL 



J 



•LIFE 




ORIENTAL 
CONFECTIONS 

which h:*ve f"5r centuries rav 
khtfd Lhe ta^t*? of wnni^-n o( 
the Orient, are tio« for thtj 
iirm lime offered in AtntTka, 
Made *fter rciapt^ Kaudird 
duwn From ( ^ya i>l Clcopaita,. 

la Five Styles : 

Almond, Filbert 

Pineapple* Cherry 

and Assorted 

Plua oT chocoUtc covered. 
la ordering bjiecify whJLh. 

Pfke, $tM per pound 

iExpreaspaidi 

m pnte lliiiu u y t^it er dDri- 
Jf!CLiont — liut juHt i]»Hi: much 
b*n ef, 1 hi*y make the dam- 
ikttand most uniaue as wdl 
as iti.c]%t aicept»Dl<! gitt of 
the holidfiy seiU'jfi. 



URELK-AHEt^fCAN CONFECTlONEtY 
7-9-1 ( mai-iQA Strecli New York 



f A tlemnrkable AlmiiiiiMik for the j^bx (Ajuh? 
Domlnli) iJ^Oii. contaLaLnict a complete RAlendihr 
ftad Ahnmlaace of Ob&urviuicins. Kt^edpTft, 
Signs wtid other psirucuJam f^r vtrj c*>UJtd- 
etmhle Tc&Tters both iis«ruL and i?nrorialalDir to 
ml\ gocHi I'enptc. The Whole jJcrForKied without 
LQV(>ca.Uou or coDjnrlu; by Alfmd Bartlett la 
bid frtrtc, which l& loctuvd on Com IlIU, la 
Boston. 1 1 mi^ke!! iv tin I q u e Ch rln miBa j^tft ftDd 
Ia well worth harlu^. Ejend for It. 




Oxydonor ' 



JVaJ* ¥^ri Jltgiittrtd 

Efiitioulif^ a luw or^ 

of fvery dts^iiFe from 
wlt!( h HI u ti k 3 n d fniSt*m. 
ON;YE>OWR com pel a the body J 
to ab*:irb Olj(j'?:n frnni the * 
atmoephf ro to tlio thoroneh f 
ol:yirft]iitiou of the whole vol- 
pme o f the b lood , f orci ng dis- I 
cAAefroTii the Hystemth roil k'ti | 
the tiiitunil Chan act j^. lb- 
ioinnin, Ifhetiinat»m^ Ca- 
tairh , >'e nou b Debi I i t y, D i a- 1 
bete^H Tfeurai^la^ La Gnppe^ I 
Malaria, etc, -ioon d i aappear r 
wht'n OiydtJiinr ift uawi 

unit J^WES i^TEWAftT, Jft-p] 

Prt^'t Ps«- »lilll iiat Miilg- Co , 

., iDcin* a* » ftht?n tiHJiU'LTnnil fori 
Ftbuunuudimi U of irrupt r&luc to I 
aJ' 1 

1 OXYDONOR riiriis \^ hile 3 o« «*t ot f li'*?P La^H 1 

#ji nrHiimi' *irrvca iho en Tin- family, B»;^'ar<' i»' ' 

/Uuiii^roii^ irruut u ►n^. Thi- nauii- of Dt SutiL-ht- 

fls efiffniv* a on Hh' j.n tnuoo t ixydonnr- k^Nsfc rc»r ^ 

Shat naiuu. Iti^iruvKvo literfltiiry ott rr-iLi'-^^'t. . 

, DR# Hi SANCHEdcCg. ^^ _. 

?IT Fiftii A^€„ Ne-r York. 61 FlFtb St., Drtrold. MJcIl, 



Th« founder of the EVANS BREW- 
ER.V me^tered th* sqlencc of bTewJng 
9\jp«rlor &!« e^rtd estabti^K^d the busl^ 
nosa ir\ 17 S^* since wKJcW time Kis 
dos^cendents hft.ve m&.de ur\lnterrup<©a 
strides In perfecting their prodyct &nd 
CLdded to the i>orfected art of brewing 
the JntrlOfcte sclen<^e of bottllni— B.ri 
«^dvftr\t&tfe the.t h&a pl^oed 

EVANS' 



ALE 



B.t the he«d of the brewing In- 
dustry of the world. Never be- 
fore his ale att&lned the perfec- 
tion achieved by the product of 

C. H. EVANS & SONS, 

Brewenv JlaJtweJrt A Bottlerp, Hud* on, N. Y. 
Apply to uu duler n^yw hers. 



Note tBkr^iullv the letbel 
upon having 



^nd Insist 




i here are otherst>-t'*lled milk-chocobies* but P*^t*r*» 
is the original (nidde in SwitMrtaod) ; the only one 
that ntver prod aces thir^rl. Hijjhly nourishing and 
warmly commeaded for the use of children, invalids 
and tsersons of vftak djpesiion. If your dealer does 
Dot Iteep P^ter**, send l<ent stamp to the 
U. 5. Ssllliig A9«at% 

UMONT. CORLISS X CO., 2iw";iSSS''c.?r: 



THe 



^ 



EOUlTABLEf 



HENRY B.HYDE 



^4fm 



J,W.ALtXANDER 



' J.H.HVDE 

VICE PftESIOENl 




A GOOD 
RESOLUTION 

for 1903 would be to save some- ^ 
thing from your income. i 

An Equitable Endowment policy will /* 
not only help you to save something" during" 
1903, but will help you to sove during every '^^ 
year for 15 or 20years — and will assure ^ 
your life in addition. g 

A resolution of this kind will not " 

benefit you-or your family-unless it is 1^ 
carried out. If it i^ acted upon, the money 
you mi^ht waste will be saved. ' 

If you would like to accustom yourself to 
saving something" each ye^r, fill out coupon below | 



(TaCRTicl**p* In pvpft Stnt^ fnr in«n or rhnrftPter to net ii« 
[rpprewrrttrtflvpw. Appl y tn Oftgr E, Tarbpll, 2d yirP-Prf-w*) | 

TUK EilXlTAUlM LIFE ASSURANCE SOCIETY, 
1^ BRO A E W A Y . KK W YO R K. Dept No. 27, I 

Fleaae b tid me Inforn aUon regarding un Enrtowtnttit for l 
t,^^^..^ ir Issu d lit yenra of ftge* 



L^ 



Name. 



Addresfl...* 



LIFE 



Jaanaryl, IWI 



...JUST PUBLISHED... 

Three FaC'Simites in Color 



.AFTER.. 



SA^^AI?!) JO/fES" 




CfopvrighttW2,byUft 

*' The Secret— B?eii Fishet Have Sara" 





Copyright 1901, dy I^fe 



Oopyri{fhitWl.lfyUflt 

"DeiBcrt,'' 



*Cniaoet** 



Size 11x15 CLi\d Tipped on Heavy Carbon 

MELTON MOUNTS. SIZE 15 X 20 INCHES 
List Prico Sl.OO EoLch 

T'&e^o Carbon P/>oto^rap/}4: 

...AFTER.... 

C. ALLAJV GIL'BETtT 




Chpyrightt9l»,tyJ4fe 

'* Bud of a Love Story 




«o ^ 9fl ww^e*!* St..* e*!*!* «•«••■* 



OopyriQhtlWi,tyL^ 

"AUlaVamtj" 
SIZE OP PRJNT U X 14i MOUNTED, 15 X 20 INCHES 
List Price $3.00 EoLch 

LIFE PUBLISHING COMPANY 



VOLUME XLL 



NEW YORK, JANUARY 8, 1 903. 

Entered at tbe Kew York Poit omce a» S«cond'ClftS» MkH Miner. 
Oopjrigbtt lOOiS. t>y life Pt^SLissfNO CoHfAir?. 



NUMBER 1064. 




A PftOPOSAL 

* IH?aB Mfi ! BFT We'RK rtttl^Ktekli Ti> UAVM. IlKACnCD THE .MsK OF DISCfiETIO^.** 
*' Oa THE rOJ^TBAWY, We'VB PAM^KD it, TU^.VIt H^AVKX I '^ 



eOPVRiaNT FOR 0«KAT ■mTAIN BY JAMKS HCNOKHBON 
UNOCII TNK ACr or 1««1 . 



LIFE 




Health 
Clear Skin 
§ood Figure 

1 ton trjlntt t<3 I'utitlEK'? 
you If J (Ml n»nt la re- 
duce Ooftb, buHd up 
your nu-uf Q, r«&«w ami 
btretLi^thcn t» e r v e 
lorcr'. to ti0 rvUc'Tiid cf 
Indi^tMiUQu. B 1 ^ V p- 

Torpici Ltver, sluHvinb 
Olroulation. Bbaumatism. Weak Hcrart c^r 
Lusffs, dlMAMs peoullAr to tlw- iH»i, {;'r aU mw^n^-i 
ohronlo Atlmantiy I can do mor« f or yau ihMD. pLj*^- 
oluia can do. 

I thorooffhlj ttady your omw, |»reivrlT^ fcr jon tlir 
dtotand Uie bathlnir which your fiytieia j f attire* atnl 
glreyon ipeelal azerolMS nooMMirr lo tirlnjr ^^rn cut 
•• an indtTtdaml to perfect hoalth noi ii:^ii]rm'tr7. It 
Ifl to my IS yeam of work with womcD tn f ^rvon oeriTc 
I began my Inatrnotlona by mall, Uiax i a.\tnhKHrtny 
marrelooe nuy^esa with niy mall pupil j. I luvi; rnii^ti 
Id oat one inetanoe to reUere th*^ roadltlnn 1 letgiit 
to relierek Xy work la not moM^^j Ur fuerelK' alone. 
It ifl physical culture. It beffizm witi^ tb« ckuh*^ 
'"" -- -" • -- r^tliBii3iii»Jifld 

■ M. rvuuw » le-jtunnj I ftduoe her 
When I boUd Ukt, I halld bxr ta 



with the rital onranii. the nenre c^ni 
thelieari, and when I reduce a vimanj 
to stay reduced. 



•tayboilt. 



-^ workcnltiTatefl the diattniT'iliiiM carrj&fifa M.a4 
beariaff and the engaging preeenc-u and euw, wliJc:^ At 
oncebeepeiUc culture and reHneni^iit- It ptve*yoq 
polse^ mental, moral, Tltal— perfci't Hir^ficMp<»«ton, a 
clear brain, quick perorpuon fcad a narre tote* 
▼itamnt with Ure. 

I can take but a limited numb«r of pupils, beoauM^ 
I clre each pQpl< my personal at'«?nt mn. 

If you will write to me, I shall I'm ^lAd Vt t»ll toq 
iostwhat lean do for you, sendJnir tdu rmiipicto 
Informa ion la regard to my work 4n<i t^tllDp f dq . 
whether I can reach your case hmi how, I nn^wj 
that I can reauce prominent abMiofntcA un4. Iilpe,^ 
build up thin necks, bust and ch^ i-i, »d(1 bHnrnDf 
woman to ronnduesB and vymmcin, and I can flv^ 
them relief from above di8*a»es. f ha-nv done ill pf 
the<M Hundreds and hnndr«ds of tirnr*- It 1?^ iio 
longer an experiment wtth me. Write to ma, iut tea cunts I a^^ad you an lastmctlre and loter^ 
eetlng booklet, showing the correct linee of a woman's fl^nrw m poise and morement, and a card 
of correcc poise for your dressing table. 

Tours fbr a body expresslnir perfect health, perfect grace and perfect womanhood, 

SUSANNA COCROFT. Dept. 110, 57 Waahlntfton St., CHICAGO. 




MiMOocroft{sihePrt9tdentofthePhv*ical<MtUf^BxUn«ionW<n*1nAfnm-iccL, t%UUtmffMent 
introduction to the pubUo, 




A ticket to California via the 

Gelden State Limited 

is practically a guarantee that for 2J4 
days you will be supremely happy ; 
that you will sleep soundly, fare on 
the best the land affords, meet pleasant 
people, see interesting scenery, and be 
transported from the centre of the continent 
to its southwestern corner in the briefest 
possible space of time. 

Newest of transcontinental trains — and 
the most comfortable. 




Rocklsland 
System 



Leaves Chicag^o daily via the £1 Paso-Rock Island 
route. Less than three days to Los Angeles. Through 
oars to Santa Barbara and San Francisco. Electric 
lights ; electric fans ; bath room ; barber shop ; Book- 
lover's Library. Lowest altitudes of any line across 
the continent. Tickets, berths and full information at 
this office. jno. Sebastian, P.T.M., Chicago, lU. 




Annual Sale 

At "The Linen Store" 

JbffaCwW fVa^jriri 

Will commence Friday, January 2d, and continue 
throughout the entire month. The goods which we shall 
offer will be, in every instance, of the same high standard 
of quality that has been maintained by us since the foun- 
dation of our business, almost fifty years ago, and will 
include 

Tablecloths and Napkins. 

Table Damask by the Yard. 

Hemstitched Table Linens. 

Doylies, 5carfs and Centerpieces. 

Towels and Towelings. 

Hemstitched Sheets and Pillow Cases. 

Embroidered Bedspreads. 

Quilts and Blankets. 

Most of these lines show substantial reductions in price. 
Booiclet (32 pages) teliing about the goods 'mailed free on reqaest 

James McCotcheon & Co^ 14 West 23d St, N. Y. 



JAMAICA 




5"fS"KWEST INDIES 

An ideal spot in which to spend a wlnter^s vacation and avoid all the extremes 
of ihe northern climate. 

UNITED FR.UIT CCS 
STEAMSHIP LINES 

Operate weekly between BOSTON and PHILADELPHIA and JAMAICA, the 
munificent twin-Bcrew U. S. Mail Steamships: 

Admiral Dewey Admiral Schley Admiral Smmpson Admiral Parraffot 

KalllBffi Weekly from Bottoa and Philadelphia 

Fare for ronnd trip, inclading Btateroom accommodations and meals, $75; 
one way, $40. 

Send for onrbeavtirtal booklet wkether yon eon ten plate the triporaot 

UNITED FRUIT COMPANY 

Pl«r 5, North Wharvea, PHILA. Long Whart, B05T0N 

Foil Information and Tickets of Local A^ent 



LIFE 



/ 






COLLLGE 



% 



IQ-^T 



V^\ 



25 



-^*?RIDGE, VIX3: 




* THB0B OOUHTBY B078 WHO COHS TO THB CITT FOR FAMB OFTEN LBAVB SOMETHIKO BETTER BEHIND.'' 




After the Holidays 

BOKE, broke, broke 

No joy in life I see, 
And I would that my tongue 
could utter 

The thoughts that arise in me. 

O well for my innocent child. 
That he shouts with his sister at play I 
While smashing the last of the toys that 
lived 
Through strenuous yesterday. 

O well for the bachelor man, 
And the maid that is fancy free. 

Ah, little reck they of the care to-day 
That is sorely vexing me 1 



For the Christmas bills flow in 
To their home on the crowded file ; 

In dumb despair I place them there 
On the top of last year's pile. 

Broke, broke, broke, 

No pleasure in life I see, 
For the unpaid bills of a day that is dead 

Will ever come back to me. 

Jennie BetU Harttwick, 

Extravagance. 
nPHE man was very angry, and now 
^ that his tongue was loosed, he 
upbraided his wife bitterly. 

** You are extravagant ! " he cried. 
" Only yesterday I paid a bill of ten 



thousand dollars for the persons you 
killed with your automobile last 
month ! " 

** And everybody is ^sneering at 
me beoause I run over such cheap 
people ! '* wailed the woman, rocking 
to and fro miserably. 

This touched Ponsonby's pride. He 
bit his lip. Should he confess that he 
was wrong and ask to be forgiven ? 

After all, it was only what he had 
always done before. 



TXTEareashatpy as we think we 
^^ are. 



2^ 



LIFE 




♦* While there is Life there's Hope:' 

VOL. XLl. JAN. 8, 1P08. No. 1064. 

19 Wmt Thirtt-Firot St.. N«w York. 



Publiflbed everj TnxxnOaj. $5.00 a year In ad 
7t*4<*' ^<?SU*«® ^*> forel^ countries in the Posul 
Union, $1.04 a year extra. 81ngle current copies, 
lOoenU. Back nombers, afterthree months from 
date of publication. 25 cents. 

No contribution will be returned unless 
accompanied by stamped and addressed 
envelope. 

The illustrations in Life are copyrtghted, 
and are not to be reproduced. 

Prompt notification should be sent by sub- 
scribers of any change of address. 




A/[ ARK TWAIN 
is writing in 
a contemporary 
magazine about 
Christian Science. 
He does not in- 
dorse it ; qnite the 
contrary ; but he 
thinks it works 
surpassingly well, 
and he seems to 
think it has very, 
very pro6X)erous 
times ahead of it. 
He is fairly well satisfied with it as a 
means of making people feel as well 
as they are, and does not worry be- 
cause it sometimes kills a patient who 
is truly ill. He believes, or affects to 
believe, that its adherents are going to 
be the strongest religious body in this 
country except the Roman Catholics, 
and he foresees, or affects to foresee, 
that in the end its votaries will deify 
and worship Mother Eddy . Preposter- 
ous as this last suggestion seems, he 
cites some interesting facts in support 
of it. 

Our Brother Mark's expectations 
conflict. It is possible that Christian 
Scientists may presently worship 
Mother Eddy. It is also possible that 
the Christian Scientists may presently 
form a very strong and numerous re- 
ligious body. Either one of these 
things may happen, but not both. The 
advertising columns of every news- 
paper attest the credulity of the Amer- 
ican people in the matter of cure-alls. 
Charlatans, nostrum - vendors and 
bogus healers of every description gull 
them by the million every day. 



But setting up a new divinity is a dif- 
ferent matter. American training is 
not favorable to that. 




T^HE North American Betfiew has 
begun serial publication of a 
new story by Mr. Henry James. The 
Review is in its eighty-eighth year, but 
it never printed a work of fiction be- 
fore. If it is to change the habits of a 
lifetime it does well to begin with a 
story by Mr. James. People read the 
Bevieio not so much for entertainment 
as for edification. To the same end 
they read Mr. James's stories, and 
they get what they are after, for Mr. 
James is undonbtedly edifying to read- 
ers who have the leisure and' the req- 
uisite mental qualifications to daUy 
with him. Neither the North Ameri' 
can nor its readers will find fault with 
him because he does not introduce de- 
tectives or broadsword exercise into 
his tales, nor use rope-ladders for 
the facilitation of matrimony. He has 
come to his own, and his own has 
taken him in. 



his skill, and though he commonly 
gives away a generous share of it, the 
market price for what he sells is high, 
and his pecuniary reward is ample. 
That is as it should be. Unusual talent 
and skill should have their due peonn- 
iary reward in every profession. Bnt 
whereas money-miJdng is the chief 
end of business, it is, or should be, an 
incident of the labor of professional 
men, and especially of dootoni. The 
success of a business man is measured 
by his profits. The reputation of a 
doctor or lawyer is merely reflected in 
his fees. They are not the measure of 
it. It is the business side of him that 
makes money, but his professional side 
that wins fame. It is a misfortune 
when a doctor lacks business sense and 
does not get his just dues out of people 
who can pay, but we do not like doc- 
tors in whom the business faculty is 
too prominently developed. Their own 
professional brethren don't like them 
either. When a great doctor is a pig, 
as occasionally happens, the other doc- 
tors know it and criticise him. But it 
does not often happen so. The big 
doctors are pretty big men, and Doctor 
Lorenz is a fine example of them. 




TT has been generally appreciated 
^ that the purpose of the labors of 
Doctor Lorenz in this country was not 
to make money but to advance medical 
science. Nevertheless, there have been 
exaggerated rei)orts of great fees that 
he received, and rumors that he had 
earned a great sum of money caught 
his eye. He took the trouble to dis- 
close that Mr. Armour paid him thirty 
thousand dollars, and that his other 
fees for private operations were barely 
sufficient to pay his expenses. He was 
none the richer for his visit, he said, 
for his private practice in Vienna 
would have brought him in quite as 
much as he received here in the same 
space of time. What pleased him 
here was his reception by his col- 
leagues and by the people, and the 
facilities afforded him to make his ex- 
perience profitable to physicians and 
their patients in America. 

A great physician or a great surgeon, 
if he practices in a big city, commonly 
gets rich. There is a market for all 



T T is matter for congratulation that 
-*- President Roosevelt has been able 
to avoid the undesirable labor of arbi- 
trating the matters in dispute between 
Venezuela and Europe. There was no 
doubt that he preferred not to undertake 
the work, and the readiness and the 
fitness of The Hague Tribunal for such 
duties has made it feasible for him to 
decline. It is his busy time. He is 
already working full hours on work- 
ing days, and though at a pinch he can 
turn his hand to arbitration, the pinch 
must be urgent to warrant him in 
bringing personal relief. War in Vene- 
zuela is merely war, and on a small 
scale at that. It is not a critical 
exigency like the coal strike, and if 
it were, it is not certain that the 
President would care to meddle, for 
the cure of the coal strike is still much 
discussed by publicists who think it a 
dangerous precedent ; and the hope is 
earnest and pretty general that it may 
be the only case of its kind. 



LIFE 



27 



Life's Dictionary of Interna- 
tional Biography. 

LEO TOLSTOI. 

n^HE Russian Goyemment has not 
yet begun erecting statues to this 
crank, but then the Russian Gk>yem- 
ment is young. 

There are cranks and cranks. 

Some men are bom cranks, some 




*' A ciHzen qf the world.'* 

men have crankiness thrust upon them, 
and others acquire it. Tolstoi is all 
three. A crank has been variously de- 
fined, but in general it may be said he 
is one who is so far in the minority as 
to be a present failure and a future 
pattern. 

This gentleman is a citizen of the 
world, incidentally bom in Russia. 
He is very much set in his ideas, and 
believes in the strange doctrine of pov- 
erty. But this is doubtless due to his 
environment. Had he been bom in 
this country and had the advantage of 
living near enough to Uncle Russell 
Sage and Pier]>out Morgan, he would 
probably have realized the error of his 
ways. At present he is groping around 
in the dark, insisting that honesty is 
the best policy. 



Leo Tolstoi does not believe in insti- 
tutions, but then he has never seen the 
Beef Trust in active play or sniffed at 
the Standard Oil Mint. 

Leo Tolstoi does not believe in mar- 
riage. But then he has never lived in 
Chicago. 

Altogether, he is a hopeless lot. 
Afflicted with a positive mania for tell- 
ing the truth, he is out of place any- 
where. As a reformer, he has done 
#■■ 

' nothing but live up to what he believes 
in — always fatal in a reformer. As a 
preacher, he has preached to the pulpit 
instead of from it — an unforgivable 
9 Bin — and, as an all-around crank, he 
^ has been so unconventional as to be in 
continual ''bad form." Newport 
wouldn't tolerate him for a day. 

There is nothing, then, for Leo 
Tolstoi to do but to acknowledge him- 
self de trop» 
In the meantime, Money is " It.*' 
Tom Ma»«on, 

Esoteric. 

'T' HE principles of world politics are 
^ esoteric. They have to be. Other- 
wise they would be absurd. 

When the British forcibly possess 
themselves of the orderly, decent 
Boers and their country and make 
them a Crown colony, we Americans 
say never a word. 

But how we bristle when there is 
talk of the British or the Germans 
taking a slice of South America away 
from a gang of turbulent, unreliable 
Spaniards ! 

It would be quite inexplicable, were 
it not world politics. 




c^-.; 



" WOT'S DAT TOIT SAT f TOU IK)N*T LOT! KB t 
BCJH I DBN I*LL JB8T ETIBLABTIN'LT I«AX TXB 
TILL TXB DOBS.** 

Materia Medica. 

« AITH is the great cura- 
tive principle. In order 
to be cured, when you are 




sick, you need have faith in 
something ; in yarbs, or prayer, 
or serum. 
Yarbs seem to be pretty much 
out of it. 

Prayer is cleaner than serum. You can 
have faiih in prayer without contracting 
blood poison. 

Prayer is natorally inexpensive, but this 
disadvantage is being rapidly overcome by 
Christian Science. Some day, perhaps, it 
will cost about as much to believe in prayer 
as to believe in serum. 

Personal. 
TpDITOR : You must try and culti- 
-*^ vate a vein of satire. 

(Contributor: How can that be 
done? 

" Well, study yourself." 

^T^HE years are steps that break from 
•^ under us as we climb. 




EDITOR OP LIFE. 
Ikar Sir: I ask your attennon to the en- 
dosed, and In tbls connection would state tbat I 
resrretfully stopped my 8Ut)scriptlon to wbat I 
considered tbe wittiest paper published In the 
world because of Its narroumest on many ques- 
tions, chief of which I can mention vivisection 
and Imperialism. Very truly, W. W, W. 

December 8. 

Our thanks ; but we think this cor- 
respondent a little unjust, perhaps, in 
his application of •* narrowness." As 



to Imperialism, events seem to be bear- 
ing out the correctness of Life's " nar- 
rowness.*' 

In the matter of vivisection, we think 
the iwpular verdict is entitled to re- 
spect. 

FROM AN ENGLISHMAN. 

I always defended your sincerity and stood up 
for your paper, althous^h probably two-thirds of 
the time I did not airree with you. 

Bedford, Ind., December 18, 1002. 



28 



LIFE 




"TT is a real pleasure to chronicle an in- 
-*- tellectual treat among the books of the 
day. The attitude of the essayist seems 
out of vogue. The man who ** keeps office 
hours with his own soul" is a back number. 
Dollars and dogmatics have driven mere 
ideals to the wall. The Lo$i Art of Reading, 
by Gerald Stanley Lee, dares to recall these 
methods, to practice these self-oommunings, 
to defend these broken idols. Some of us 
will shrug at the volume. Others of us, 
having read it, will keep it near us. (G. P. 
Putnam's Sons.) 

Out of the West is a first novel by a new 
writer, Elizabeth Higgins. It is a specimen 
of the story political. An Eastern black 
sheep, exiled to Nebraska, becomes a Popu- 
list leader and goes to Congress. Here, 
being by nature a black sheep, he, so tosay, 
returns to his mutton, and the book ends 
with a fit of repentance of which one doubts 
the permanence. As reading matter it is 
neither good nor bad. (Harper and Broth- 
ers. $1.50.) 

A political novel of more dash and a story 
of more holdfast interest is Tfie Henchman, 
by Mark Lee Luther. Items of Republican 
methods in Western New York, and the 
relations between **The Boss" and '* The 
Henchman " strongly suggest well-known 
figures in not too ancient history. (The 
Macmillan Company. $1.50.) 

We have so many books upon old New 
York, its associations, traditions and 
changes, that additions to the list seem 
superfluous. Yet Rufus Rockwell King is 
one of the most pleasing compilers of such 
subjects, and his New York, Old and New 
is better planned and better written than 
most. It appears in two attractive volumes. 
(J. B. Lippincott Company, Philadelphia. 
$3.60.) 

Musings WUhaut Method is the title of a 
collection of monthly articles republished 
from Blackwood^s Magazine for 1900 and 
1901. They are by an anonymous writer, 
^'Analist," and deal with current events — 
political, literary, artistic and social. The 
author has a pretty turn for satire, but 
many of the matters touched upon have 
already been forgotten, even in England, 
and few of them are of moment here. 
(McClure, Phillips and Company.) 

Glimpses of China and Chinese Homes, by 
Edward S. Morse, differs from most records 
of travelers' impressions by the compara- 



tively technical nature of its subject. The 
author has been a resident and a student of 
Japan, and visited China for the purpose of 
studying their interiors. His drawings and 
comments are accurate and reliable. (Little, 
Brown and Company. $1.50.) 

Sir Alfred LyaVs biographical critique of 
Alfred Tennyson forms a contribution to the 
English Men of Letters Series which main- 
tains the excellence of this interesting work. 
(The Macmillan Company. 75 cents.) 

J, B. Kerfoot. 

No Danger. 
■piRST FINANCIER : Aren't you 
-^ afraid this deal may land ns in 
jail? 

Second FmANCfiXB : Nonsense. Yoa 
seem to forget that millions are in- 
volved. 



W 



Wine, Woman and 5ong. 

"HO loves champagne, sonbrettes and 
song 

Is wise, or else the proverb's wrong ; 
But it is true that love like this 
Means Paris first — then paresis. 

Felix Carmen, 



nPHE egoist is an optimist : he ex- 
pecte his neighbors to love him 
as he does himself. 



Genius. 

"Y^ELLOW EDITOR: Have yoa 
-*- had any experience as a re- 



porter? 

Applicant : No. 
I am a bom liar. 



Bnt they tell me 




SNAPSHOTS IN HADES. 

A XAOBIHS rOR PUHUBIHe PABSHTS WHO VETEB BBABON WrTH THBIB CBILDBBlft BUT ALWAYS 

SLAP THBIB PACn FOB TBmAL OFPBNCBS. 



LIFE 



» 




Another Champion. 
"pjOCTOR WILLIAM W. KEEN, of PbiladdpMa, ia a warm 

supporter of vivisection. He thinks it ehonld be e«* 
cooraged and that Senator Galliuger should refrain from his 
endeavor to have it restricled. 

He proves to his own aatiiif action that he saved a man** life 
once becanse the cutting up of hve critters had taught him 
£c)inethiDg, 

He does not like the idea of having men Uke 
Senator Gallin^eroome between him and 
hia fun* H.^ bujs : 

In Tlew, therefore, of tbe 

flucti experLmiMiiM, l triiat tbAt 
70a will be wilimg tn desLflt 
from fntihereD'oru &t aticti re* 
pne^lTe, fttid, ab I re^rd Ic, 

IliUOQ. 

** Inhuman and cruel 

legtslation '' j 

Well, these vivisectionists are certainly humorous 

when they g-ive their minds to it. In the meantime 

bring on your pet animals and let the fmi go on with 

the merry knife anil tweezers. 

Late. 

'T'HE provinces are beioj^ railed at for their uegleot of 
■^ KociflR. But, after all, i» Kodan^» mUfortyne their 
fault? 

Asa matter of fact, the proTiiipe» know evf-ti le^a a!>(>tit 
art i ban New York, and they art quite m devoted to the 
art w h ich rem a 1 » a esoterie . W h 1 1 e }■ e 1 1 he i n cu rs i o n f fo r- 
fiugn musical CffkbriCiffl was nt-w, it wu^ the gitruient of a 
very ordinary celebrity which did not Imve at Jca>it two 
liema kJs^ed off it during a tour of Ihe proTineesi. 

Bui when art preBt-ntly ditjeloaea iu oomtnercial motive. 
the provineeB shi ft their point of Tie w. The proviuce» k now 
a thing or two about busine-'^s proiwaitious. 

The trouble with Koemn Ih that he m late getting labo 
the game. 






'* MHE B|SU>KOB TO THE 400» UOXflR^T 
*' WBLLt BHIE OUOHT TO BT THIJ* TIM 



K. RHZ HAS 



MAaBiKu Tuata of TfriH/ 



The Drama. 

IHE manager listened coldly, 

''It takes something besides epigrama to 
make a play/* he said, when the author waa 
done reading. 
^^ *' Yefl, but cannot the actors be depended on 
— " to inject the necessary indecency? " asked the 
author. 
The manager laughed a short, brutal laugh. 
'^ I can't afford to hire very great actors for an mi tried 
plHv/' he replied. 

^tlTHEN we aee something nice we want it. That is why 




A MILL KAOB. 






laws are made. 



30 



LIFE 




Lq%: 



A Ray of Hope. 

N 'HIS IB from a document now being 
-^ ciroolated, and it gives much tmth 
in few words : 

Every respectable man in thia 
city is interested in abolishing 
the indecent conditions which 
now disgrace the management 
of our elevated and surface car 
systems, which make it impos- 
sible for any woman to use 
these public conveyances with- 
out unavoidable and indecent 
contact with others, and, as a 
result, frequent gross insult 
which cannot be resented or 
avoided. 

The x>etition accompany- 
ing the document shonld be 
signed 1^ every New Yorker who cares for public decency 
or for his own rights. May the petition fulfill its mission ! 
As the document further relates : 

The time has come when every man who has respect for his 
mother, wife, sister or daughter must protest against this condition 
and assert the public right against these usurping corporations who 
use the right of public control over public property for private profit 
instead of public benefit, for which latter purpose it was granted. 

This thought has been thought, and many times and 
repeatedly thought, by every traveler on Kew York 
street oars. 

Harold and His Pa. 

•* "pA, don't you like New Year's? 
-*" You always look so sad. ' ' 

<'No, not specially. I am not 
going crazy over the idea of 
New Year's, my son." 
"But why?" 

'* Well, this is the time when 
the bills come in." 

** Are bills so awful bad, pa, 

that you don't like to have 

them come in ? " 

" Some are, and some are not. I never mind my bills for 

cigars, but it makes me hopping mad when I see the bills 

for your mother's hats." 

" That's funny. I should think you would mind one as 
much as the other. What are bills like, anyway? " 

"Well, some are like thirty cents, some like thirty dol- 
lars and some like a house and lot." 

** Dear me, how awful ! But is New Year's the only 
time they come in? " 

* * Oh, no. But New Year's is the time we celebrate their 
coming in more than at any other time." 

*' But I thought that to celebrate meant to be happy." 

•* Not necessarily, my son. You celebrated the Fourth 

of July, but when you burned your fingers you weren't 

happy. Your dear papa sometimes celebrates at the club, 

but it doesn't always make him happy — the next morning. ' ' 

** Well, pa, why do you have the bills come in, if they 




make you so sad ? Why don't you tell them to stay away? 
Why don't you say ; 

*' Bills, bills, go away. 

Come again some other day ? " 

'* Because, my dear little boy, that wouldn't be right. 
Besides, your dear mother wouldn't like it." 

** What has mamma got to do with it ? " 

'* Oh, not a great deal. It is her business to see that they 
come in, that's all. That's your dear mamma's occupation. " 

" How funny I I thought you were the only one in the 
family who had an occupation." 

" Oh, no. Your mother's occupation is to see that just as 
many bills come in as possible, and my occupation is to pay 
them — if I can." 

" But suppose you can't." 

** Then I stand i)eople off." 

" What does that mean ? " 

'* Now, my son, you're getting too personal. Run and 
play." 

" But when I grow up, will I have to celebrate New 
Year's that way?" 

** That depends, my boy, on whether you become a 
husband. You are already an American, which is only 
half of the condition." 



M^ 



'RS. YON BLUMEB : What sort of a hostess does 
Mrs. Oaterby make? 
Yov Bluxbr : Splendid. She made me feel as if I wasn't 
at home. 



T. PETER : Where did you oome from ? 
Arrival: I jumped down from the roof of a New 
York office building. 



S 



•* TT'NOW thyself, " said the ancients. 
-^^ *' Be thyself, " say we. 







He: OH, STOP cbtxmo, built, pkoplb can*t always be loviho bach otbbb. 




LIFE 



31 




Toptrigkt, 190M, by !//• FuUUMng Ob. 



Actress: i want tou to mbmtion the fact of mt diamonds being stolen. 

" WHEN DID it BAPPBK f " 
*• NEXT WEEK.*' 



L 




Ooprrffht. t$OS, hf lAf FmUUhlng Oo. 



"THE TEMPTATIOI 

U5C1E SAM Ih 




n OF ST. ANTHONY." 

J THE TTTLB B^LE. 



34 



LIFE- 




t \ % I i i r^ 






DRAMATI 




Bad Actors and " The Girl With the 
Green Eyes.** 

T^HE dearthofyouDg American actors who 
-*- can play even the simplest parts accept- 
ably is a most noticeablef conspicuous and 
lumeiitable fact. The young Americans who 
to-day are occupying leading positions in the 
best companies we have are so notably 
incompetent, so little educated for the 
PE RSO N A. work, and so little artistic in their con- 
ceptions and methods that there must 
be a fundamental reason for the de- 
ficii'ucy. The primary reason is doubtless that 
w(f arc; Dot an artistic nation. We have been so 
biiziy fikrhting, first for an existence and later for 
commercial supremacy, that there has been in 
thb t:o!iatry no atmosphere for art. The best re- 
wi>r4v tt,r which men strive were to be gained in 
more prosaic pursuits, and the man who would 
go in for esthetics must have a courage, rare in artistic natures, to 
overcome the rebuffs, discouragements and discredit in his path. 
The American woman, being of more delicate and receptive tem- 
perament, has succeeded, and does saoceed, better in meeting the 
requirements of the stage. 

Besides the conditions incident to our national growth, those 
surrounding the theatre itself are calculated to turn away from it 
Iht? very men it needs. An educated or refined man 
win dful little in the stage life of America to 
tvnipt him. Its whole tone is grovelling and 
(here is in it nothing of artistic incentive 
or inspiration. The highest ideals of 
those in control are that the men of the 
»L3ge should be physically good looking, 
tiiat they should be animated clothes- 
nicks, and that they should be objects of 
jidmiration to the matinee girl. Brains, 
temperament and breeding are in no way 
uecessary. For this purpose the good- 
Iwking stable-boy or bar-tender is quite 
Kufficient. 

If you doubt this condition — etr- 
cuinapice ! 

• * • 

HE GIRL WITH THE 
GREEN EYES" will 
'' never send the name of Clyde 
. Fitch booming down the paths of 
f Fame. Even in the way of con- 
* temporary value it has less to recom- 
mend it than his other pieces. As 
faintly indicated by the title, its 
modve is a young woman's Jealousy. But 
in working up the complications which 
the jealousy causes Mr. Fitch takes his 




\\ "^] 



incidents so far away from the realm of not only probability but 
possibility that his audience is in a continuous titter, not at the 
comedy itself, but at the absurdity of episodes which are supposed 
to be serious in themselves and important in their consequences. 
To bring in his main reliance — the clever and faithful staging 
of familiar scenes from real life — he takes his jealous girl 
and her husband-victim to Rome and gives us a carefully 
wrought up gallery scene from the Vatican. The action takes 
place in the cabinet where stands the Apollo Belvidere, and 
horror of horrors! Mr. Fitch has the audacity to lug into his 
lines that antediluvian remark of Mrs. Perkins, of Boston, who 
prefers the physique of Perkins to that of the famous statue. In- 
cidental to this scene is the introduction of a party of Cook tour- 
ists and their conductor who, as here pictured and under a strict 
interpretation of the law, might give Messrs. Thos. Cook and 
Son ground for a libel suit. Through improbability of incident nnd 
faithfulness- of detail the story proceeds by bumps and jerks to the 
final catastrophe, where the jealous one who, by her blind self-de- 
ceit, has made needless trouble for everybody, attempts to suffocate 
herself by turning on the illuminating gas. She is overcome by it 
but is discovered before she is actually dead, and promptly regain- 
ing consciousness, goes through a reconciliation scene with her 
husband, showing thereby that she has a vigorous constitution 
proof against the usual effects of inhaling the gas manufactured by 
the Consolidated Gas Company. 

Conspicuous in a weak cast is Mrs. Clara Bloodgood, who 
jumped into prominence by her first appearance in *' The Conquer- 
ors," and has since gained notice as a portrayer of very modish 
women in society plays. Jealousy, as a rule, is supposed to go with 
a more or less passionate temperament, but in her early and ten- 
der relations with her new husband, * Jinny* Aiuitin is a very ice- 
bergy bride, indeed, and one whom it would be difficult to con- 
ceive as caring enough to be jealous of any one. In the jealous 
scenes, however, she is more effective, and gives a fair illustration of 
the utter absurdity of that emotion. The other members of the 
company are mediocre, the remarks above applying with especial 
force to the male members. 

*' The Girl With the Green Eyes " is endurable, but it reflects lit- 
tle credit on its writer and producer. MetoaJfe. 

LIFE'S CONFIDENTIAL GUIDE TO THE THEATRES. 

Academy qf J/twic— Spectacular 
Ninety and Nine." Worth seeing. 

^«/(Mco.— "The Darling of tbe Qods.* 
markable play. 

Jroadwoy.— "The Silver Slipper.' 

Ccuino,—*' The Chinese Honeymoon.* 

2>a/y'*.—" The Billionaire." Notice later. 

Empire.—''* Imprudence.'' Agreeable little comedy, acceptably acted. 

(?ard«w.— Sothem in ♦' Hamlet. " Excellent. 

G'orricI:.— Mrs. Langtry in *• The Orossways." Notice later. 

Herald Square,^** ixiiVaE Ciesar/' with Mr. Mansfield as Brutus. Good 
production. 

Knickerbocker. —Hi, Goodwin and Miss Elliott in "The Altar of 
Friendship.'' Amosiag little play, well done. 

Madison Square.— EliZAbeih Tyree in '♦ Gretna Green." Notice later. 

Manhattan.— Un. Fiske in ''Mary of Magdala." Interesting and well 
staged. 

New York.—'' When Johnny Gomes Marching Home. " Musical comedy 
of Civil War times. Diverting. 

Princess.—** Heidelberg." Sentimental little play of German student 
life. Rather Interesting. 

Savoy.—** The Girl With the Green Eyes." See above. 

Victoria.—** The Eternal City.'' Strenuous dramatization of Hall Caine's 
novel. 

Wailack^s.—*' The Saltan of Sulu. " Notice later. 

Weber and J^e/<i«'».— Vaudeville and burlesque. Millionaires who will 
pay the speculators the price they ask and who conduct themselves re- 
spectfully when passing the box office may see the performance. 



and religious melodrama, "The 
Remarkable production of a re- 
Musical comedy. Fair. 
Musical comedy. Better. 



mmm 



LIFE 



35 




Mr. EUwha$: tou mioht bat ih toub abticlb that during oub klopbmcmt mt wifb was 

WHILB I HAD eOHB VOB AMUTABOB BOMB OBB BOBBBD BBB OV A PAIS OF BXAUTITUL lYORT TUSKS. 

Th§ Joumatttt : tou must bb ooibo oh the btaob. 



ALMOST DBOWBBD IB CBOS8IMG A BXTBB, AHO 



Success to Trade. 

T^HE heart of every sturdy 
^ grocer, butcher and stock- 
jobber in America throbs in 
righteous sym- 
pathy with the two 
evangels of civiliz- 
ation now engaged 
in collecting bills 
along the Spanish 
main. The one 
dark cloud hang- 
ing over our pros- 
parity is the knowl- 
edge that at any mo- 
ment our debtors may 
go into bankruptcy, 
while we are debarred the international luxury of m^ng 
them settle with a gun. The principle of cannonading 
nations who are small enough into a settlement of our de- 
mands, without the intermeddling of courts and lawyers, is 
sound, and meets the approbation of every patriot in trade. 
It saves anxiety, postage stamps, commissions, time and 
subscriptions to Bradstreet and Dun, to send all bills 
against fraudulent foreigners to the Navy Department 
with instructions to collect right off. 

Business men are out of patience with Spanish America. 
The inhabitants are foreigners who can*t speak English ; 
being Latins, they are inferior to us ; being black and tan, 




they are entitled to no consideration ; and their courts and 
laws should be ignored by us. It is a waste of time to 
argue with them ; arbitration is only for world powers ; 
and it is an excellent training for our fleets to bombard 
towns. and knock down forts. Naval authorities agree 
upon the necessity of target practice. Our Anglo-Saxon 
States never repudiated their debts ; we never inveigled 
foreigners into building our railroads and then swindled 
them out of their stocks and bonds ; we never abused 
foreigners living under our flag ; and no world power has 
collected its bills from us with artillery, because we have 
always been a white man's country and a guardian of 
civilization. 

Venezuela is poor, weak and ungrateful and ought to be 
cannonaded. Anglo-Saxon ideas should be encouraged 
and collections made easy. We have been too considerate 
with Dagos. Look at the Monroe Doctrine. Because we 
guarantee the sacredness of the soil, are we to deprive the 
honest white trader of his right to grab the fruits of the 
soil? Never! As a God-fearing, freedom-loving, com- 
mercial people we rejoice that at last armies and navies are 
being used as the agencies of trade and civilization in the 
collection of bills and the discouragement of Dagos. We 
must impress our superiority and moral worth upon the 
inferior races by reproving poverty and disciplining im- 
pecuniosity. 

It will be a great day for the Republic, a glorious vindica- 
tion of the Declaration of Independence, when the honest 
principles of international bill collecting are applied to our 



36 



LIFE 



domestic policy, and when we abolish 
bankraptoy laws and courts and utilize 
onr army and navy in collecting the 
grocery and bntcher bills of our fear- 
less and Christian merchants, manu- 
facturers and hucksters. 

If our strenuous President desires to 
endear himself to that great bulwark 
of American government— the Ameri- 
can shopkeeper — he will at once dis- 
patch Dewey and his fleet to aid our 
German and British brethren in the 
glorious work of compeUiug decadent 
Dagos to pay five hundred cents on the 
dollar. Joseph Stnith, 

Unembarrassed. 




TDOUGHLY speaking, there are 
-^^ about three classes of Senators, 
as divided by their sentiments touch- 
ing the Statehood bill, viz.: 

1. Senators who favor admission be- 
cause the new commonwealths are 
likely to elect Democrats to Congress. 

2. Senators who oppose admission 
because the new commonwealths are 
unlikely to elect Republicans to Con- 
gress, and 

8. Senators who favor admission be- 
cause good friends of theirs will be 
financially benefited. 

The situation is singularly unem- 
barrassed, it would seem, by Senators 
who look at the matter from the stand- 
XK)int of the general good. 

** 'yHEY say Grater is a man with 
■^ a New England conscience." 
" Beally ! And how much did he do 

you out of ? '* 

3 Cheers for Wm. 1 

TT is interesting to learn that a 
-^ PoliBh schoolgirl, named Kopec, haa been 
aentenced to fourteen days* imprisonment in the 
province of Poaen, for leze majeatf , in baying 
tbrown a brooch with Emperor William's plctore 
in it to the floor and stamping upon it. These 
brooches, it appears, were presented to the 
papils of the schools when his Majesty visited 
Posen. 

This is good work, William. 

We rely upon you to see that all that 



relates to your imperial sanctity shall 
be reverentially treated. If • there is 
any foolish public sentiment in Ger- 
many that prevents a severer punish- 
ment for children in these cases, you 
might manage to ruin their fathers' 
business. 

Don't weaken 1 

Children are a bad lot. 



<2" 



Literary Item. 
uid Avemus f (The Blim Blam Com- 
pany, Chicago, tl.60.) 

This superb collection of the inde- 
cent letters which have been rtmning 
serially through the mails distinctly 
foreshadows a new literary form. It 
sounds the knell, we may suppose, of 
the decadent historical novel. 

In itself, and apart from its relation 
to art in general, the book is extremely 
clever. 

The words which had to be replaced 
with dashes and asterisks in order to 
avoid conflict with the law have nev- 
ertheless been made use of, rich prisses 
being offered to the readers who shall 
guess what they are. The organiza- 
tion of guessing circles in connection ^ 
with church work is suggested — a very 
pretty conceit. 

The people in the illustrations all 
look like driveling idiots. This is ex- 
plained by the fact, frankly stated in 
the preface, that it was the original 
intention to put the book out as a 
juvenile. 

The stage rights are reserved. 

'yHE following form of At Home 
cards will be popular this winter : 



Mrs. JOHN H. SMITH 
Miss MABEL SMITH 



Warm Tuesdays in 
Febmarj 



100 Jackson 
Boulevard 



The Real Truth. 
•* T^IDN'T she marry a ' has been ' ? " 
-^-^ *' No. She thought he was a 
* will be,' but he turned out an • isn't.* " 

n^HE gods of Olympus have shrunk 
•^' into the fairies and ogres of the 
nursery. 

T OVE is gracious only to beggars. 




Festina Lente. 

'T behooves Congress to be 
very cautious about taking the 
duty off anthracite coal. 
The tariff, as it is scarcely 
necessary to say in these days when 
Republican platforms are as much read 
as the Bible, primarily protects the 
American workingman in the enjoy- 
ment of an American living. Of 
course the nation will not stand for 
legislation likely to reduce onr hard 
coal miners to the abject manner of 
life of foreign labor. 

The fact that the duty was put on 
anthracite by stealth is immateriaL 
The Lord moves in a mysterious way 
His wonders to perform. 

•* ■^^ID that great football player 
"^ that Carrie married make a 

success? " 
*' Oh, yes ! He got a position as 

porter in a hotel." 



T^HE only wizards who beheve in 
^ their own magic are the children. 




A BOCIBTT BUTTBnVLY. 



\ 



LIFE 



37 



EAR ME, aid friend, how 
Time does fljr! 
T see you with a baby carriage 
And think of days when yeu 
tifid I 
Deliberat4?d love and marriage : 
T*5n yearB ago who could have told 

The sequel to euch cogitations 
Or gutisaed ^rhich of uii first would hold 
One of the seeoud g^an^ration ? 




I mJud me bow wt used to flit 

Around tbe board wiih pipes 
and vhifiky^ 
Wout to pbiloBopbize a bit 
Ajid trade off stoH^ r&tber 
riftky ; 
I mind me of the goo^ cigars — 
How many ^we haTc sujoked 
toj^ether \ — 
Beni^ath the eun^ the moon and fltara^ 
Alike in every kijad of weather, 

ar« those old ilmes, bat 

Wo fclill Binivnjf the living Urry : 
And life's prescription isoems to b« 
^ill Shak*pere*B fi^uent dose— "Ay, 
marry ] '* 
So here' 15 a health to Her and yuM — 
Cotupauioua Jive until you i^ray be! ^ 

And here's another, just as Irue — - 
Congratulations to the Baby I 

F^i£ Carrmn. 




LIFE 



^^^M^ 




MEHITABLE HAWKIN& 
Mehitable Hawkins (if you should e'er see her, 
I'll bet you would much rather not, than to be her!) 

Mehitable Hawkins 

Was richer than cream — 
Her riches beat e'en an 

Arabian dream ! 
She dressed up in satins 

And imported things. 
And trimmed all her hats with 

The choicest of wings; 
She called up her footman. 

And goodness alive ! 
How folks craved her money 

When she went to drive ! 
She touched on a button — 

The world bent the knee ; 
She walked in the park and 

The world rushed to see ; 
She ate from plates golden 

The rarest of foods, 
And measured her habits 

To cuddle her moods; 
If soured on sour 

She ordered up sweet. 
And the wealth of the world 



Was laid at her feet. 
Ah ! tell me, now who could 

Much happier be. 
Than this most remarkable 

Aladdin— She? 
Mehitable Hawkins 

Was sixty years old 
And had more of temper 

Than she had of gold : 
She raved at her dresses 

And imported things, 
And swore at her hats and 

Her choice, costly wings ; 
Her foQtman, poor fellow. 

Was very near dead 
With frequence of cussings 

Aimed at his poor head ! 
She swoce at the servants 

Who answered her call. 
And walked so bow-legged 

She'd frequently fall : 
Her golden plates bored her. 

The foods botches were — 
Not even her habits 

Would last long with her ; 
She soured on sour. 

She soured on sweet — 



Not the wealth of the world 
Cured the corns on her feet ; 

In fact, for each coin that 
She threw to the wind. 

She paid to the limit 
In unrest of mind. 

MehiUble Hawkins (if you should e'er see her. 
I'll bet you would much rather not than to be her.) 
— Baltitnore News. 

An amusino 8TORT is told of the editor of a go- 
ahead London evening newspaper who. In the eter- 
nal rushing to press to get ahead of tbe oppoaltioii, 
was constantly impressing upon his reporters the 
necessity for condensing all news. 

A terrific boiler explosion had taken plaxse on 
board a big ship lying at Portsmouth. 

"Get down there as hard as you can," he said to 
one of bis men. "If you catch the 11. 40 from Lon- 
don Bridge, you'll be there soon after' 2. and can 
Just wire us something for the fifth edition; but 
boil it down." 

And the reporter went. Soon after 3 o'clock 
that afternoon they got a wire from him : 

"Terrific explosion. Man-o'-war. Boiler empty. 
Engineer full. Funeral to-morrow." — London TU- 
BUa. 



LiFi is for sale by all Newsdealers in Great Britain. The international News 
(Tompany, Bream*8 Building, Chancery Lane, Liondon, E. C, England, Aanrrs. 



Established 1823. 

WILSON 
WHISKEY 



That's All I 



THE WILSON DISTILLING CO., 
Baltimore. Md. 



The High Standard of 

Hunter 

Baltimore 

Rye 

is the result of selected Rye, 
careful distillation, thorough 
ageing. 

Wm. Lanabah & SoH, Baltimore, Md. 





london dcmi 

UTHIA WATER 



Begniles ^ tedium o£ a long jour- 
ney because it refreshes and invigor- 
ates, besides preventing tbe system 
from becoming deranged by the I 
irregular habits that result from much 
traveling. LONDONDERRY is 
sold on all bufiEet and dining cars | 
the same as at your hotel or dub. 




Th* 



Egyptian 

Cigarette 

of Qvjetlity 



At 3roar 
tilnb or daaler't 



AROMATIC DELICACY- 
MILDNESS — PURITY 




For lovers of good things to cat and 
drink. A delicious beverage and a 
piquant seasonings 

Amf\o\jr & Company 




Retains the full Havor of and is a sub- 
stiiuie for frc^h ajiparagus. Served at 
fountains and cafes. Sold by grocers. 
Chicago, Illinois 





Plain or chocolate covered. 
In ordering specify which. 

Ptictf $K00 per pound 
(Express paid) 

Haggis Loucoumes are higher 
in price than any other con- 
fection^—but just that much 
better, lliey make the dain- 
tiest and most unique as well 
as most acceptable gift of 
the holiday season. 



QRBEK-AnBRICAN CONPBCTIONBRY 
7-1^11 Marion Street* New York 




CO. 



'LIFE' 
Sea|)oard Florida Limited 

SHORTCST LINE SHORTEST TIME 

New York to St Augustine 



An Ideal Train, all Pullmans, 
with Drawing-room and 
Compartment Sleepers, 
Dining and Observation 
Club Cars, during the Tourist 
Season. 

The route to Raleigh, 
Southern Pines, Pinehurst, 
Camden, Columbia, Savannah, 
Brunswick and all the best Win- 
ter Resorts. 



For Book of Winter Tours and Booklets 
describing ** The Land of Manatee/' on 
the West Coast of Southern Florida, apply 
to Agents of the 

SEABOARD AIR LINE 
RAILWAY 

OR 

C. B. RYAN, a. P. Am Portamouth, Va. 




Master thinks Im a dandy 
at mixing cocktails^. 



@:ktails 



YOU 



c8Ln do it 
fust as well 



Pour over lumps of Ice* AtrB^tn «Lf\d serve 
SEYEN KINDS BEWARE OF IMITATIONS 



G. r. HEUBLEIN ®. BRO. 



HARTFORD 



NEW YORK 



LONDON 



II you're e^ fudge 
of ChampsLgne and 
have not tried 



Veuve Clicquot 





You Hsl ve sl 






unique experience 






<x>ming. ><><>< 




^ 




-/ 



National Eleotrio Vehloles 

Handsome, sracefbl, ttaoroagbly depend- 
able. Bailt for reliable, everyday servloe 
and glyeit. Simplest in oonstmction, safely 
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Writ* for <mr llliulnA^d ovtalofiM ihowliic 

01M17 Mw sad ImproTsd •laeferio mitoraobati. 

lilKgALYmOllOll. 906 EadBtHlpd^^^^rMi^M 



HH I»» H I. 



• i* 



* o 



i> 



• 



THE ABOVE IS THE TRADE- 
MARK WHICH FOR 300 
YEARS HAS DISTINGUISHED 

Chartreuse 

-GREEN AND YELLOW — 



THE LIQUEUR MADE BY 
THECARTHUSIANMONKSOP 
LA GRANDE CHARTREUSE, 
GRENOBLE, FRANCE. 
A GLASS OF THIS MOST 
DELICIOUS AND WHOLE. 
SOME CORDIAL IS A FITTING 
FINALE TO A GOOD DINNER 



At flrit-daM Wim Mtreluuilt, Oroeen, Hotali, Cftftt. 

Bfttjer ft Co., 45 Brosdwav, New York, N. Y., 

Sole Agenu for United Sutes. 



WE 

PAY 

POST- 

AQS, 



All 70a have guessed about life 
Insorance may be wrong. If yoo 
wish to know the trutb, send for 
** How and Why," Issued by the 
Pknk Mutdal Lifb, 
921-8-6 Chestnut Street, Philadelphia. 




Tot stocking* 

» "Hold Up" 

for ditcomfort 

'Let Up'' 



NoCh^mg or 
Rubbing by the 
Clasp; that'i 

Fl&t 



BRIGHTON 

Silk G&rter 

rOR MEN 

Bes that «* Brt^litoii *' is on t he clai; p. HQ ovBiU 
a pair. At rieak^ri^ or hy miiii. 

PIONEER SUSPENDER CO., 
71S Market St.^ PhiUdetphift, 



LIFE- 



(gNTEMPO; 




Regaki>in41 the dJs put lit ion on r^runl literature 
t)fltwe«ii Sir Edward Clarku uad Iildintind Guniie, 
Th& London Qlohc prlots thl^ tpigram : 

Tlie ODe acrotiB the Dar bat^ ntray^d 

To m\l for unknown sboree ; 
Til"? other qulta the Bonrd of Trade 

To join the tTade of Bores^ 

FoH convenience, really superior hottil service 
for select ptttronagfc. and climate, therf? in nathlUB 
for New Yorkers quite llko Lakewood, New Jersey, 

La ruE L- IN 'THE' Pine b. 



A French MA^^ was payttifi hla flrst vl&lt to 
London, and was walking through Hyde Park on 
on« of tho many tas¥^y metropolitan morotngij with 
an En^lUh frlfitid. Fog! Ha, ha, mon freii.' 
ejaculated the Frenehrnan ; "now I understand Tot 
you mean veil you n^&y ie puu uevaire act on your 
dooiinion. Ma tol, It does not Hae." — Toledo Blade. 

CALIFORNIA IN LES5 THAN THREE DAYS 
TTA Chicago Hfjd North-Westeru, L'uloo Pacific, aud 
Southern Pacific Railways from Cbloago. The elec- 
tric- lighted "Overland LJTOitrd" provider the best 
of evorytblug. Dlveryity of rontes ; fiue»t Eicenary. 
Compartment observation cars, buflet-Uhrary cars 
(with barber and bath I ; dlnli^g t-fl^ra* All agents 
aeil tickets via. thla route, 

Mi3Th£ss (m itMrpjri.Hi*i i Why diel you place the 
alarm clock by the buckwheat batter? 

NojiA I So ut would know what time to rise, 
m,um. — Chicfigo Daily 2<^eii^ii. 



A TRAVSLiNa Irish divine alters hla benevolent 
pbra^e aeeordine to hid loci^lUy^ vU, ; "Dear BeTfa^ft 
So:4b/' "Dear Dublin Soule/* "Dear Cork Souls." — 
The Moon. 



HcTBL (JUAMBiHiiiJf, ftt Old Polot Comfort, Vft*. la 
great. Id Sou theru f anii I les >t t h e Vui n t every jentt. Try 
a tIalL Do it now. A postal Lirlugfa the booklet, 

A Texas paper declares that a Tarrant County 
girl, who is attending school in Fort Wortbr re- 
cently wrote home to her parents: "I am Just In 
love with piag-ponp!" Wben her stem TeiaK 
father read her letter, he remarked: "Vou ran 
write and tell Amarlllls Jane that If she U f^olngr 
to fall in love with any of them blamed Fort Worth 
Chinamen she can ju^rt rount on being tut off with- 
out a eent/'— ^r^onUMJt. 

In need of a tonic y Take AbtHitt'H, tbe Oriif tna! Anf oa^ 
tniB, the king of tonloa. At g?ocer§ iLnd drugglita. 



"O ! SIt^'8 so sweet, e-o angelic and fair/* airbed 
Lotett Fursjyte. "But I know I shall never auceeerl 
In winning her love" 

"NonKen=.eV' exclaimed May Sharpe. "'Lots of 
other men have succeededr Why i^houldn't you"" — - 
Philadelphui PrcM. 

If yoa are going hnntjag.jon ahonld provide yourself 
irlth Coak'ti Jmjttfial A>fr<3 Ifjy ChfimikiQnf, 

The manager of a i^oncert given in a small 

town, Instead of putting "not transferable" on thr 

tickets, posted a Tiotlee on the door: "No genUejtjinn 

Hted unlcRf be tomes hfm^elL" — Fo>iit^'t Com- 




Th© only PIHE and rORHECT ARTIFICIAL 
KTNFIAL WATERS sold In America to-day, 

CARBONIC, ARTlFICrAL VICHY, 
SELTERS, CLUB SODA, Etc.» 

are al*o put up In bottte^i for out of town 
delivery, tin^i f>aa he tmiX by freight or 
CJtpre^o* to any part of the I nlled fitales. 
Orders to 

CARL H. SCHULTZ 

Tel. 3<a Jf*dlaon Sq, 4%^44 First Ave . N. Y, 




Pure 
Habana 

] Segars— 
I Always 
: Mild 

And 

Aromatic 



Mtvd« in the o1d-fak,shioned honest 
wav of P\ire Haba.n&. Tobacco 
delightfulty blended 



Look for the B\i!l 
Dog on ee^ch Box 



J^hn W. Merria^m & Co. 

The Rovcroft Sega^r Shop, which 
Is -At the Sign of the BuU Dog'* 
N E W Y O R K 



" I Ginflijii Old Braid V maiJa from iiai/' 

MARTELL'S 
THREE STAR 
BRANDY 

AT ALL BARS AND RESTAURANTS. 




Scotch 
Whiskies 

JOHN HOPKINS & CO. 

Gl ASGOW ANO LO^DOAf 

'^Glen Garry^' 

AlriD 

*'Navy Liqueur*' 



"fii# l*#»t Scolck 
f*varite4 of 



Boolclct af 4i) our 
Mitr upQo request 



C, H. ARNOLD & CO. 

AGCNT5 rOR V. S. 
27 South Wiiliflin St. 

Ntw vomi 



LIFE 



$ore Throat 

Hoarseness, Quinsy .Tonsillitis 

Laryngitis and otiier tliroat 

troubles quiclcly relieved 

and promptly cured 

by the use of 

iigdrozone 

This scientific germicide is used 
and endorsed by leading physi- 
cians everywhere. It is afyso^ 
lutely harmte^^, yet a most 
powerful healing agent. 

By killing the germs that cause 
these diseases, without injury to 
the tissue, Hvdrozone cures the 
patient. Sold by Leading Drug- 
gists. If not at yours, will send 
bottle, prepaid, on receipt of 25 
cents 



Q^ 




Dept. D., 60 Prince St., New York 




Rare Old Violins 

(LarffMit and flnaat oollectfon on this oontinant, 
comprislxLg the complete celebrated Hawley 
colleotion. Fine oatalosne «£ree» containing 
60 facsimile labels incolonand Blographieeof 
all the noted malcera. Listand partioalarsof 
Solo instrnmente from $50 to $10,000. Monthly 
payments may be arranged. Violins sent on 
seren days examination. Formal certificate 
of G«>naineneaii with each Instrument. 

LYON & HEALY. ''iSS^ 



THERE ARE NUMBERLESS 
BRANDS OP SCOTCH WHISKIES 

on the market, admitted to be blends 
of this, that, or the other 

WHY SHOULD WE HAVE BLENDS ? 

Is not a fine, well matured, strictly 
pure article, the product of the best 
distillery in the Glenlivet district, at 
good as can be? AH this blending 
tomfoolery U done to cheapen* As men 
nearly a half century in the business 
we do not believe that anything is as 
good as the gtraic^ht article. Our oldest, 

The Bonnie Brier Bush 

is the best we ever saw. 

The Souvenir of Scotland 

is from same distillery ; not as old. 
For sale in bond in original packages 
or from store, in quantities to suit. 

H. B. KIRK & CO., 
SOLE BOTTLERS, NEW YORK. 



(From the Yale Rtcord.) 
WHO ARE THEY? 




THEY ARE. 

I. Th« gill his mocbv jvanU 4> Hb ftnt knre. 
him to muTj. 5. TIm cM b« eolf* with. 

,9. Th«girlwithmofM7. 6. Th« gfri he flfats^irith. 

3. The girl who jOlcd him. 7* HIePlalooic friend. 

The Owl wishes to announce that he has won the 
I500 offered by Li/i for the correct solution of the 
Gibson Girl puale. We print f he successful answer 
above. 




^ CIG ARETTES 

A STANDARD OF 

EXCELLENCE UNJURPAUED 



•rltfRT' 



^^ IfyoQwantto 

^^^ know how to do yoar 
advertising at less cost, if you 
^^^ .^ish to become an ad-writer or 
^ manager at $10 to $100, if you wish to gain 

I knowledge that wiU positively increase your salary or 
I income, if you wish your son or your daughter to 
I learn a dignified and quickly-profitable profession, 
1 send three a-cent stamps for prospectus and read In it 
I the terms on which 1 give a ftltiv guarant$t •f 
I incrtaiU tarningi. « „ « -. 

lARLES AUSTIN BATES 130 Waisaa St.. New Ysrk^ 




NAB18C0 

Sugar 
Wafers 

A Fairy Sandwich with an 
upper and lower crust of 
indescribable delicacy, 
separated with a creamy 
flavoring of 

Lemon, Orange* 
Chocolate, Vanilla, 

Strawberry, 
Raspberry, or Mint. 

ABk for your Ikvorite flavor. 
NATIONAL BISCUIT COMPANy 



What Man's Affections 

Mint iNf^t riTtreBw^i \\\ 

WHITMAN'S 

Confections 

WHITMAN'S 

Instantaneous 
Chocolate. 

\ ^Mudf In II iiilittHH.' I 

-Tmi[ ^v^Hh-HT 
blilllT!iU LIpklk. 
HTKI'Hi;^ f . 
W1IJTJIA 






CHESTER CREST. 

Nortli Fovrtli Ave., Moant VerMM, N. Y. 

A quiet resort with every comfort, for men nervously 
disordered through dissipation. Communications 

strictly conlldentlal. Address G. S. Avery, Manager. 
Telephone— 445 A. Mount Vernon. 



" Irresistibly Delicious " 

ta the only phrase that properly describes 



LIFE 



jAnnuy 8, iSQi 



VEVEY 

swtTzeauANO 





- ^TriEOf^iqi^l^L 

cMILK-CHOCOWTE 



It is a confection, yet a wholesome food. For it 
nourishes and sustains, and is the o«ly chocolate that 
can be eaten freely by children, invalids and persons of 
weak digestion. 

If yourtfaaUr do«t not k««p PETER'S, tontf 2^ant 
•tamp to-tha U. 8. Soiling Aganti, 

UMONT. GBRLI8S I CO., 2eV?8JI8"c.Vy: 




*" Now, don't cry. Tommy, that's the boy. Look out of the 
window and watch the trolley kUl somebod y.*'— 77^^ Moon. 



MORTON TRUST COMPANY 

38 NASSAU Street, New York 

Capital, - . . $2,000,000 
Sarplus and DodlTlded Profits, $5373,061 

OFFICERS: 
LBVI P. nORTOBl, President 

THOMAS P. RYAN, Vic«;Pre«ldent 

JAMES K. C0RBI^ERE,2d Vice-Prest. 
H. M. PRANGIS, Secretary 
EUGENE B. VARET, Asst. Secretary 

G. L. WILMERDING. Asst. Secretary 
H. B. BERRY, Trust Officer 

EXECUTIVE COMMITTEE: 

Lev! P. Morron Joseph C. Hendrix 

Thomaa P. Ryan James N. Jarvle 

Bdward J. Berwind Qeonre Poster Peabody 
G. G. Hayen Jacob H. Schiff 

William C. Whitney 




BLACK, STARR 
«wi\d FR.OST, 

458 FIFTH AVE*. 
NEW YORK. 

WEDDING 
SILVER. 



■RCAO'MAKcna 




It is 

Real Cory 

That is what ladies say of 
The California Limited 

Private compartments, 

ample dressing rooms and 

observation parlor, all daintily 

furnished. Perfect dinmg-car 

meals. 

Chicago to California in less 

than three days. 

Why stay at home ? 

The California tour described in our 
books ; mailed lor loc in stamps. Address 
General Passenj^er Office, Atchison.Topeka 
& Santa Fe Railway, Chicago. 

Santa Fe 



^W^O the perfected e^rt of brewing, 
^ the nin.kere of WL'^^t^s* Ale 
hn.ve euccesefully etclded the 
intri<^eLte science of bottling, e^n 
eLchievement that hoLS resulted in 

EVANS* 



ALE 



^vr»attr\g the suiyretBiaLoy of tKe 
Ale Industry from th« Old World 
— eLfiother Instance of Amerloekit i 
•nterpfiso leAdlng the ^va.v to] 
better tKlngs ^.r^d lower prloee. 
Art ytu In ttap with the march of profreM 7 | 

Apidy to nearMt dealer or write to 

C. H. ETANlH 6c 80NH, Hsdsoa, N* T. 

Establiahed 1786. 



WASSERMANN BROTHERS 

STOCK BROKERS 

40 EXCHANGE PUCE, NEW YORK 

Members of New York Stock Exchange | 

BRANCH OFFICES: 

753 Fifth Ay enae( Plaza Bank). 

Windsor Arcade, corner 46th St. and 5th Ays. 

Astor Court (Waldorf-Astoria Uotel). 

Imperial Hotel. 

5 West £6th St.. opposite Ifartin^s Reetanntnt. 

Fifth Avenue Hotel. 




' LOS ANGELES-Four Days from New York or Boston-By NEW YORK CENTRAL 



VflLUMI! m. 



Entered at thfl New York Poat Office us Secojjd-CUi^a HaU Marter 



NUMIERIBii. 




COWPULSORY HARMONY. 
OKI SOBS Tttm vouk jiXD thb iiTurit suabes tub viwyriT. 



W^VRMHT worn I 



UNOCR THE AOr OF 1S91. 



uir u 



VAN NORDBN 
TRUST COMPANY 

751 FIFTH AVENUE.NEAR 58Ti* STREET 

NEW YORK 

Capital and Surplus, $2,000,000 



No. 18 

The temporary offices of Van Norden Trust Company 
were opened for business March 31, 1902. 

The following statement accordingly represents nine 
months' growth: 

STATEMENT, DECEMBER 31, 190a 



RESOURCES 
V, 8. Md K. T. i Itj BoBds 91,007,718.14 



Other iBTMtBieMU 
TlBie l^ani • . . 
Demaad liOaai . . , 
CMh Im BiMks . . . 
6old U Taalt . , 

Legal Teadert U Tanlt 



2S8,0«6.«4 
. 1.7l8.Ut.90 
. «, 107.986. 6« 
. 1«24«.0U.67 
. 4««.I4«.90 
. 106.000.00 
$<.864.00w.OO 



LIABILITIES 

Capital $1,000.00000 

Harplas l^OOO.OOU.OO 

Uadlflded Profltx . . . nQ,9iS.Ht 

DtpoalU 4,80t,168.08 



$tt,He4.O9e90 



OFFICERS 

Warner M. Van Norden. Presidtnt Morton C. Nichols, Vice^Pres. an*i Src'y 

William F. Havemeyer, Vice-Prtsideni Arthur King Wood. Asiuiamt iitcrttary 

Edward S. Aveiy, Trust UJ/Ufr 



Warner Van Norden 
Warner M. Van Norden 
William F. Havemeyer 
^ohn H. Flagler 
ames Talcott 
on. Cornelius N. Bliss 
John Claflin 






DIRECTORS 
Dumont Clarke 
Henry F. Shoemaker 
, Benjamin Perkins 
Richard L. Edwards 
John H. Washburn 
Jonathan B. Currey 



Thomas P. Fowler 
Ernst Thalmann 
Charles W. Morse 
Mahlon D. Thatcher 
Henry H. Cook 
Henry T, Bronson 
Arthur A. Fowler 



Life Insurance 

Free from A.11 

Sfieculative 

Featured. 



THe 



Travelers 
Insurance 
Comliany, 

Hartford^ConiL 

S.D. DUNHAM, 

Pretideiit. 



Accident Insurance 

in the 

Oldest ^ E/ai«gest, 

and Strongest 

Accident Compaiiv 



How Pennies Count. 

ACCIDENT INSURANCE* 

Almut four cents a day, yihAi yom 
tifieitd for news p4i]*erH, will proi^ure 
yuw, if ft prflJiertvd riHk,tLn aucident 
jtn I i y pn y i t] g Jvl, tXlO for B<H*i d en tal 
ilfmh or lofiiiiint'hoth *.*ypH or limbs j 
and in-oportinnnte ami Hints* fi>r loss 
Mi one tye or liniVi ; $15 n wlh k (or 
inuihli^jibiiity ■ $(laut»pk fnr par- 
tin 1 disubilitv ; and doijhif the al>tj va 
umouiito foriiijuritja iecciveil iu cer- 
tain specified accidents, etc., etc. 

LIFE insurance; 

Fifteen and one-half. cents a day 
will purchase a life insurance policy 
at age thirty-five for $2,500. 

Twelve cents a day will purchase 
a twenty-year endowment policy at 
age thirty-two, paying you $1,000 
cash at the end of twenty years if 
living, and insuring you for $1,000 
for the twenty years' time. 

LIFE and ACCIDENT Combined. 

Nineteen and one-half cents a day 
pu rchases $3, 000 accident i nsurance, 
and at a^e thirty-five $2,500 ordi- 
nary life insurance. 
Who says Insurance costs 
a good decU? 



!kmv*>J' 



Lundborg's 
Perfume 

VIOLET 
DEW 

and natural fra- 
l^rjincf of ihc violet is 
cmbodicfdiTi this deli- 
cate ^lasting perfume. 

l.iDD A rnvn^, ^MT \(ii\k 




Your FoLinily 

Are they provided for f 
Life Insurance in 

The Prudential 

is the greatest of mediums 
for home protection. 

WfiU/or informatUm. Dept. O. 

The Prudential Insurance Company 



OF AMCIUCA 



JOHN F. DRYDEN 

President 



HomeOiBoe 
NBWABK,N.X 



LIFE 



45 




IN S>€CUU SVECULORUM. 

Lmt; I WAS almost afbaid to call ok tou this obmturt. x thought tou bad outgrown xs. 
Life: nomssnsbI I'm always **at homx**— to you. 



46 



LIFE 




•• H'hile there is Life there's Hope:' 

VOL XLl. JAN. 16. 1908. No. 1066. 

19 West Thirty-First St., Nkw York. 



Published erery TbnradaT. 9&W a year In ad 
rauoe. Postage to forelfrn count rlee In tbe Poiiul 
Union, $1.04 a year extra. (>lnsle current cupie», 
10 cents. Back numbers, after three months from 
date of publication. 2i cenU. 

No contribution will be returned unless 
accompanied by stamped and addressed 
envelope. 

The illustrations in Xa^il are copyrighted^ 
and are not to be reproduced. 

Prompt notification should be sent by sub- 
scribers of any change of address. 




the 

current 

immljer of 

Magazine there is told, and well told, 
the story of how the city government 
of Minneapolis was allowed to fall 
into the hands of criminals, and what 
the consequences were, and what was 
finally done about it. A rogues' gal- 
lery of portraits of the criminal city 
officers is given, and very edifying it 
is. Minneapolis is one of the most 
flourishing towns in the country. It 
would resent the suggestion that any 
other city of its size had a larger pro- 
portion of upright and able citizens, a 
higher average of righteousness among 
its voters, or was more competent for 
self-government. Yet a gross, de- 
bauched, disgusting scamp got himself 
elected Mayor of the city for several 
successive terms, and finally cast off 
all pretence to decency, and allied 
himself with thieves, gamblers and 
disorderly persons for purposes of 
revenue. A brave man, a fighter, who 
happened to be chosen on the Grand 
Jury, undertook to bring this Mayor 
to justice. Some of his fellow- jury- 
men helped him ; the rest he dragged 
along. He spent his own money and 
his own strength. Finally he drove 
the terrified rascal Mayor into exile, 
and sent most of his helpers to State's 



Prison. What he did was done in the 
teeth of the protests of many cowardly 
citizens who, though not aggressively 
bad themselves, could tolerate shame- 
ful rascality in the city officials. 
That is the story that is told in all 
misgoverned cities. There is a little 
band of active scoundrels who get the 
upper hand in local politics, and a 
great body of fairly respectable citi- 
zens, busy with their own concerns, 
who only want to be let alone. The 
indifferent citizen works at his busi- 
ness and makes money ; the politician 
rascal works at his business and also 
makes money. Matters in 3£inne- 
apolis came to a worse pass than is usual 
— though St. Louis has been in nearly 
as bad a case — and the Minneapolis 
story is useful in that it seta forth 
briefly what incredible things may 
happen to towns when most of the 
competent men apply themselves to 
money -making to the absolute neglect 
of their oivic duties. 



A/T ARK TWAIN, returning in the 
**" "^ January Karth American Reriew 
to the discussion of Christian Science, 
again predicts its expansion on an 
enormous scale. In less than thirty 
years, he thinks, it will be •* the gov- 
erning power in the republic," and he 
predicts that it will be '*the most in- 
solent, unscrupulous and tyrannical 
politico-religious master" since the 
Inquisition. His anticipations are 
based not so much on his confidence in 
the merits of the Christian Science 
teachings and practice, as on his great 
respect for what he calls the " Trust " 
that is pushing them. This *' Trust," 
of which the only well-identified repre- 
sentative is Mrs. Eddy, seems to him 
to be wonderfully competent on its 
business side. He insists that it has 
made an enormous amount of money, 
and has fabulous profits in prospect as 
Christian Science spreads. He says in 
a note that he wrote the piece in which 
these opinions are expressed three 
years ago, yet he seems still to have 
confidence in his predictions. 

Our Brother Mark has had a night- 
mare. There is no doubt that Mrs. 
Eddy has made money. There may be 
a small, irresponsible but able coterie, 
of which she has been the head, that 



has found Christian Science extremely 
profitable. But no such spread of the 
persuasion as Brother Mark foretells 
seems to be yet in progress. The 
World Almanac guessed last year that 
the Christian Science churches had a 
million communicants. This year it 
has cut its estimate down to forty -nine 
thousand. That is not conclusive, but 
it does not look like dangerously rapid 
growth. Mark seems to underesti- 
mate the average good sense and oon* 
servatism of his fellow-countrymen. 



T TNDER the new liquor law now in 
^ force in England the police may 
arrest a drunkard anywhere except in 
his own house, and whether disorderly 
or not. After conviction the drunk- 
ard is blacklisted in drinking places 
for three years. If he attempts to get 
a drink he is liable to a fine, and the 
saloon-keeper who sells him liquor 
may be fined fifty dollars the first time 
and one hundred dollars the next. If 
this law is enforced, the ingenuity of 
drunkards may be considerably taxed 
to get liquor. The principle of pursu- 
ing the drunkard as well as the saloon- 
keeper seems sound, and we shall be 
interested to learn how it works on 
application. 




n ^HE appointment of Oeneral Francis 
Greene to be Police Commissioner 
in New York has encouraged the 
friends of good government here. The 
Police Department has needed a Her- 
cules ever since Mayor Low took offioe* 
and Commissioner Partridge, though a 
worthy man, was not a Hercules. 
General Greene, though he has had a 
painful experience as president of the 
Asphalt Trust, is believed to be both 
able and upright. Called now to an 
exceedingly important post in an emer- 
gency, he has a chance to do a publio 
service of immense importance. His 
time is short and his task difficult, but 
he has taken hold hard, and what he 
can do to put and keep the powers of 
darkness under foot in this town will 
undoubtedly be done. 



LIFE- 



47 




"rr ALP a block, half a block, 
-*--*- Haifa block onward. 
All in their 'motobiles 

Rode the Four Hundred. 
" Fonoard I " the owners shout, 
* * Hacing-car I BundboiU ! " 
Into Fifth Avenue 

Rode the Four Hundred. 

" Fonoard ! " the owners said. 
Was there a man dismay'd ? 
Not though the chauffeurs knew 

Some one had blundered. 
Theirs not to make reply, 
Theirs not to reason why. 
Theirs but to kill or die. 



The Charge of the Four Hundred. 

Into Fifth Avenue 

Rode the Four Hundred. 

Tunnels to right of them. 
Tunnels to left of them, 
Subways beneath them 

Volleyed and thundered ; 
Stormed at with shout and yell. 
Boldly they rode and well. 
Into Fifth Avenue, 
While rang the chauffeur's bell, 

Rode the Four Hundred. 

Flashed all their goggles bare, 
Flashed as they cleft the air, 
Smashing the people there, 
Charging the people, while 



All the town wondered. 
Plunged in the gasolene smoke. 
Right down the street they broke ; 
Copper and pedestrian 
Reel'd from their lightning-stroke 

Shattered and sunder'd. 
Then they rode back again. 

Rode the Four Hundred. 

When can their glory fade ? 
O the wild charge they made ! 

All the town wondered. 
Proud of the charge they made, 
Proud of themselves, they said, 

Were the Four Hundred. 

J, a D. 



Music. 

n^HE musical honors still cling to Boston. 
-*- In spite of the prevalence of some ter- 
ribly light operas hereabouts it is safe to 
say that all tastes in music can be satisfied 
in New York. Recitals, concerts, grand 
opera, light opera — some of it too volatile to 
mention — are all abundant. But it should 
be recorded to our credit that we manifest a 



lively appreciation of the Boston Symphony 
Orchestra. These audiences are not only 
the most intelligent musically, but they fill 
the hall. Both in size and quality they are 
a merited tribute to Mr. Gericke and his 
splendid organization. 

"TF some men told all they knew the 






silence would be oppressive. 



/COMMERCE is the evangelist of in- 
^-^ teirnational peace. 

A Test. 

TITE : Yes, darling, for your sake, I 
-^-^ would meet death in any form. 
Sira : Will yon ride on the Elevated 
from five to six P. M ? 



48 



LIFE- 




IVyf OST of us have enjoyed Jack I^n- 
^-^ don's ihort stories of Alaska. U i« 
therefore with some fear of losing a favorite 
that we approach his first novel. A iJawjh- 
ter of the Sjiowb^ however, is far from di.Hii|t' 
pointing. It is an interesting story, and i^ 
essentially true, both in its material picture 
of early days in the Klondike and hi h^ 
moral estimate of the value of the c<^nvcn- 
tions in the face of primal condiuotiK. 
(J. B. Lippincott Company, Philadelphia.. 
$1.50.) 

To a lover of fun and nonsense the com- 
piling of A Nonsense Antfiology would tMUu- 
rally seem a worthy task. There are 
some things, however, the futility of 
which can only be proved by experi- 
ment, and CarolynWells's labors have 
demonstrated that nonsense is one of 
those delicate wild plants that will 
not bear domestication. Crowded in 
a dense throng, between stifling 
covers, even our dearest bits from Alief 
herself droop and die. (Charles Scrib- 
ner*s Sons.) 

Which subject brings us to Andrew 
Lang's new book, Tfie Disentanglertf 
These tales, selected from the records of 
a company formed in London for solvii^i^ 
matrimonial tangles, are delicately poised on 
the dividing line between foolish faci and 
sensible nonsense, and give an amusini? j^Hmpae of 
society in the convex mirror of Mr. Lang's humor. 
(Longmans, Green and Company.) 

The historical romance has come to rt^^emble h 
piece of '* Louis XV." furniture from Grand Hapkij», 
a well-veneered, machine-made imitation of wimt 
passes for a bygone style. Mollie Elliot S^^awell han 
all the newest machinery. Dranzeska is her lattr^t 
output and has the approved swing, the mo^^it tukin^ 
devil-may-care spirit and the innovaUon af o. tragic 
ending. (The Bowen-Merrill Company, Indianapolis. 
$1.50.) 

Harry A. Spun* presents, witji certain argument* 
in favor of its genuineness, a translation of one t:^! 
the many tales fathered by the elder Alf^iundre 
Dumas. Leaving these delicate queitti«)[i» of 
thenticity to specialists in the higher cj-itU 
cism, it suffices to recommend Master AiUxfn , 
the Calabrian to all who enjoy a good ttru > 
well told. (R. F. Fenno and Companv 
$1.00.) 

A new publication, which for taste of 
workmanship and perfection of illustration 
bas not been approached this side of Paris, 
is Camera Work, a quarterly edited by 
Alfred StiegliU. It should commend it<elf 



to all dcvrttwfH of pictorUl j>hrttci|frn^,hy (ind till 
Iiivif m t J f t he \ M*i4n t J hi I . U.*ainff m \ Vor k , WJ \ ^wa* 
Ardl^tr^et. Ntw Yr»rk.) 

Tikf Ihuhm% Itiif^ frnm iT^an to ^Saunm 
is a htxntlmmt^ voluun? by Ed.i*Ar M»yhew ^^ 
Oaeon, priirunidy lilupitriitcHl. H i» one of 
I he cfosi-hr*Hl prmJncthuis uiUfh a tree ted 
nowadays mid. In the hmguai^ of the turf, 
h b y n iKl ori <*n 1 Jt*t m a n ci* o u l o f* Jy i di* IkuA . 
and hIiowh both the l]j|^btLno»N of [t» «ire and 
the KtJiyiiig quiilitle« of its dam. (O, J\ 
Putnam i*8onit.) J. B. Ktrfit^U 





LIFE'S FASHIONS. 1903. 



▲ PRACTICAL BUSINESS SUIT. 
WILL ADAPTED TO WITHSTAND 
TBI WCAB AND TEAR OP WALL 
8TBBKT. 



liaAwiiro ui» oww ooxcrLtnioit. 

The Frrst-Njghter* 

ItlS BALLADE. 

/^n, fwragleam of vuiiahed light 

^^ From protnptbooksof Ibii Unig ago. 
The stage is stink iu Btygian night, 
It» *tar«, aijk!t, but diroly glow, 
lu vain the i?ntk^* praises flow ; 

\V€?>edofie to death by modi^ni plap, 
As all theatric bills will show \ 
C^bp for the Drama's good old days 1 



Olif for onr moment of the might 
That made for wholesome mirth and 
woe J 

Of Irfive*"! youns^ dreAin, its future bright, 
Uf lifelong friewd, of noble ff>e ; 

All ihoiw quaint thingii w« it^ed to know 
AVhen mu - nkk touli were not a 
craze 
,Th rough five long acts of snlTering slow : 
Oh, for the Drama's good oM d&^ \ 



nb, fT>r fiome respite from the sight 
Of the*e mad myths of riuero ; 
Or5Ciw»**s trk*k9, Du Barry a blight, 
lti:itlHi'a jiigljtt ftnd dropi — but no, 
\Vu lire not flpan?d a laiit AtJl blow, 

We inuy not lio^te for mended ways. 
Here's Dnse and D'Apnunxio : 
Oil, for the Drama's good old daysl 

I^nmatic Mme. dt^^cendt for lo ! 

l^irat-nigliter^ fret with fevered gas« ; 
Mu*t tbey forever utiffer so ? 

Ob. for the Drama 'a good old dejsl 

Jfab^ Warren Saf\ford, 



n^HE good man of basiness never allows his 
opinion of his partners to escape him. 



LIFE 



49 




Underwear. 
n^HERE are only three opinions 
among eminent doctors as to the 
best material for underwear. 

Wool, or linen, or silk is best. 

If cotton ever becomes expensive 
enough to be suitable for refined people 
such as eminent doctors practice 
amongst, or on, there will then be four 
opinions, of course. But nobody sup- 
poses cotton will ever become so expen- 
sive as that. 



OST TOUB nonet's WOBTB, IP YOU CAN, BUT DON'T OTBBLOOK TBI HAN ON TBB FBNCB. 

The Continent. 
'X'HE Continent is that part of Europo which 
is chiefly inhabited by crowned heads^ 
American tourists and musical celebri- 
ties. It is quite well known through 
out the civilized world throui^h 
the Continental Sabbath. 
The Continent has 
a fertile soil. Some 
of the best French 
wines we get come 
from the Continent. 
In Grermany the 
bad and the wurst 
abound. Germany, 
Austria and Italy 
form the Dry Bund, next to the Raines law 
the most effective temperance device the 
'world has ever known. 

No description of the Continent woold be 
complete without mention of the King of the 
Belgians. His Majesty has identified himself 
with the Continent in a negative way by not 
giving a continental damn. 

Paris is very gay. It comprises the Other 
Half, the Latin Quarter and the Submerged 
Tenth. The remaining three-twentieths are 
the Bourgeoisie. 



^HE married man*s last word always 
turns out to be the one before the 



last. 






THE RETORT COURTEOUS. 

**WBT ABB TOU IN MOUBNING?" 

**Oa ! FOB MY SINS." 

"l didn't KNOW TBAT TOU BAD LOST ANT.' 



■>.!f'K 



TBB JUDOB CBABOBD TBB JURY. 



TUDGE : Your wife has shown 
^ her bruises to the jury. What 
have you to say that sentence 
shall not be pronounced upon 
you? 

Prisoner : I can prove that for 
the last three weeks she has been 
doing her holiday shopping. 



Defined. 

O HE : Dear, you have crushed 
^ and almost . suffocated me. 
What kind of a hug do yon call 
that? 

He : That's a Metropolitan 
Street Railway hug. 



50 



LIFE 




OLUMN 



What Christian Science Is Not. 

rrsO THE EDITOR OF LIFE : 

-*- J)ear Sir: go many little articles, anecdotes and poems have 
recently appeared in Life on the subject of Christian Science, that 
it is now possible to gather from them with some degree of accu- 
racy what Christian Science is not. For example, it is not " New 
Thought," as implied in some supposed *' Love Letters," nor does 
any Christian Scientist consider himself a " Vibration of the Mind 
Universal," or a *' Radiator of Hope," whatever these terms may 
mean. Christian Science is not "treating " anybody without their 
desire, nor ** doing mentally" anything to anybody against their 
will. Therefore, it is not hypnotism, nor personal influence, nor 
willing another person. 

Searching the files of Lifk for possibly accurate characteriza- 
tions, we also discover that Christian Science makes no claims to 
being "psychic," or to giving "spiritualistic insight"; is not 
especially interested in "asparagus" beds, or "rats and green 
snakes " ; and does not use the press for circulating false reports, 
or preach sermons denouncing other Christian denominations, or 
even accuse physicians, who lose patients, of having committed 
manslaughter. 

In point of fact. Life credits Christian Scientists with being 
" happy, '^ with having an " increasing membership roll," and with 
showing a " long list of the maimed and the halt now alleged to 
have been made whole." 

What Life cannot forgive is that Christian Scientists " have not 
oared death," which is a very proper grievance for Life to have. 
Ifc should be remembered, however, that among the many qualities 
Trhich Christian Scientists have not is also that of infallibility, and, 
therefore, they crave from their critics a little of that kindly con- 
sideration which seems to be accorded to members of all other de- 
nominations except their own. 

As a Christian Scientist, I also claim for my fellow-believers 
that they are not unreasonable. For instance, they do not assume 
that simply because a faith makes people better and haj^ier, 
therefore the Founder of that faith most necessarily be evil-minded; 
they do not accuse the members of all the professions under the 
sun, of all the arts on earth, and all the occupations between the 
poles, of being mercenary, because they all, without exception, ac- 
cept remuneration for their labor ; they do not call churches " cor- 
porations for profit," because most of them maintain enormous de- 
nominational book concerns, nor do Christian Scientists abuse 
authors roundly for copyrighting their books and selling them to 
those who want to buy them, at the prices that people are willing 
to pay for them. Nor, as far as I can recollect, do Christian 
Scientists attempt to decide for these authors what the prices of 
their books shall be to people who do not want to buy them. 

There are other mistakes which Christian Science teaches people 
to avoid, but I think those I have mentioned are quite important 
—in a way. ^' •^« McCrackan, 

December 20, 1902. 



A Suggestion. 

TN primitiye dajs, when street railways had 

-^ antiquated ideas of courtesy, there used to be 

signs on the street cars which stated in effect that 

the company would be glad to know of any in- 

ciyility on the part of their employees. 

These signs in New York have long since been 

taken down, and nothing has taken their place. 

This is not in accordance with our modern requirements. 

Something np to date should be substituted. 

Life suggests to the Metropolitan Street Railway that 

the following rules be ix>sted conspicuously in each car : 

Conductors sbonld report any indTtllty on tbe part of paaseniirera. 
Ladies will always remain standing wnen there are gentlemen present. 
When a passenger falls to attract the attention of the conductor, and 
rings the bell himself, tbe oondactor sboaid spare no effort to make him 



see what he has t)een guilty of. A complete vocabnlary of choice and In- 
iltlng language will be furnished to all condactors on a] 
In disciplining passengers, conductors should select 



rppUcatii 
ladies 1 



ktion. 
anaccom- 
panted by escorts, as they are less likely to make trouble. 

Whenamotorman, by Dirine Providence or other circnmstanoes be- 
yond his control, is compelled to stop his car, he should allow it to alide 
along into tbe middle of ibe block. 

A CASE OF PRESENT TREATMENT. 



MUSIC arouses emotion ; emotion, thought ; thought, 
action ; action, regret ; regret is soothed by music. 




LIFE 



51 





Health. 
OOME of our millionaires and airesses are looking tired. 
^ They need our system of physical culture. Health and 
ruddy cheeks will be restored by following these few simple 
exercises: 

BICEPS. 

Take two one-pound diamonds, and holding them easily 
but firmly in the hands, swing them above the head ten 
times, then back until the hands meet, and then to the 
floor. Be careful and not use diamonds weighing over one 
pound. Too much weight mil make tired muscles, 

NECK DEVELOPMENT. 

Placing your tiara firmly on your head, bend it forward 
until you are looking straight at a ten-pound pearl at your 
feet, then back until you are gazing at a three- pound ruby 
above your head, and then from one side to the other. 
Then swing your head slowly from side to side. If your 
neck aches in one minute, the tiara is too heavy for your 
strength. A tiara weighing over ten pounds should never 
be used. 

CHEST. / 

Lying flat on your back, place a six-pound package of 
Gk>vemment 4s on your chest, and by inbreathing raise it 
as far as possible. Do this forty times, and every day 
double the size and value of the bonds. 

CALVES. 

Hold two quarts of pigeon's-blood rubies in eaoh hand. 
Then raise yourself thirty times on your toes night and 
morning. 

At the end of a month increase to three quarts. 

Prosperity. 

TTTHEN a brutish, insolent fellow remarked that it cost 
^ ^ more to live now than it had cost eight years ago, 
the Trust President lost his temper. 

" Isn't it worth more to live in a time of prosperity than 
in a time of depression ? '' he roared. 

The boor made no reply, but slunk away like a whipped 
cur. 




|M»*TMWKUHAVIT 

CHRISTIAN 

SCltNCe. 

READER 




L 





C&pvrlght, fPOf. &y Hf* P^hUaMng Oo. 



THE 
BVKN FISl 



E. 





J! 



;CRET. 

BAVa SABS. 



54 



LIFE 




OUR FELLOW-CITIZEN, THE SULTAH OF 8ULU, AMD ▲ FEW OF BIS WITES. 





Only Two More Musical Comedies. 

^-HAT a belligerent lot of folks we are 
- getting to be I Even our comio 
operas have caught the warlike spirit, 
and the United States uniform and 
American flag properly set to music have 
become sure lures for popular favor. When 
' Me had an army of only twenty-five 
thousand men and were a peaceful, stay- 
at-home people, content to mind our own 
business and let other nations mind theirs, 
the United States soldier was not very good stoge material. Now 
that we have embarked on a career of world-conquest and have an 
idea that trade follows the flsg, our patriotic and commercial 
instincts make the soldier and sailor mighty inspirii^g characters. 
• • • 

ATEST of these appeals to the wariike spirit is ' ' The Sultan of Sulu, " 
of which Mr. George Ade has supplied the book and Mr. 
Alfred G. Wathall the music. Mr. Ade has seized upon 
Uncle Sam in his new rdle as a conquering hero, and out of 
the novelty of our relations with uncivilized races has 
managed to inject some originality into the hackneyed 
musical comedy idea. The book is not so funny as one would 
expect it to be coming from Mr. Ade, but its humor is fresh and 
clean, and its special value lies in the promise it gives of a libretto- 
writer who may have brains to get away from the set lines of a form 
of entertainment which has been done almost to death. The 
musical accompaniment to Mr. Ade*s words is not awe-inspiring, 
but it is fairly good, and some of its numbers have the desirable 
quality of catchiness. 

The title rAle introduces to Broadway a new and very amusing 
comedian, Mr. Frank Moulan. As Ki Bam^ the ruler of Sulu, who, 
among the earliest institutions of American civilization, becomes 
acquainted with the cocktail, Mr. Moulan not only is amusing, 
but is also that rarest of birds, a comedian who can sing. It would 
be well for the piece 'if the same could be said of the person to 
whom is wrongfully intrusted the important part of OoL Budd, in 
command of the American troops. Both Maude Lillian Berri and 
Gertrude Quinlan sing well, the first as the (JoUmeVs daughter and 
the other as one of the wives of our openly polygamous fellow- 
citizen in the Sulu archipelago. The rest of the cast is competent, 
the chorus redundant with pretty girls, and the stage settings and 
costumes sufficiently brilliant. 

' ' The Sultan of Sulu " is considerably better than most of its kind. 



TpROM "The Country Giri" to "The BiUionaire," which has 
-*- taken the place of the former at Daly's, there is a long drop 



from what was fresh and dainty to what is vulgar and common- 
place. "The Billionaire" was evidently constructed with the 
Tenderloin taste well in mind. Messrs. Smith and Kerker have 
been at this sort of thing so long that they know perfectly 
how to suit the requirements of the managers who cater to 
the Tenderloin grade of intellect, and the result is exactly what was 
to be expected. To Mr. Jerome Sykes, whose broad comedy as 
Fory QuilUr is agreeably remembered, is given the part of the chief 
vulgarian who gives the piece its title. In make-up he is a repro- 
duction of some well-known caricatures of Senator Hanna. Mr. 
Sykesis singing voice was in total eclipse during the earlier repre- 
sentations of ** The Billionaire, *' so it is hardly fair to Judge his 
performance in its entirety. The principal fun allotted to May 
Robson is a display of grotesque hosiery, which seems a waste of a 
talented comedietme'n real ability. The rest of the company is not 
much, but it is quite equal to the material with which it has to 
deal. 

Such a piece as "The Billionaire" at Daly*s will be rather a 
shock to the persons of refinement who have been accustomed to 
patronize that theatre. Metcalft. 

LIFE'S CONFIDENTIAL GUIDE TO THE THEATRES. 

Academy qf JftMk.— " The Ninety and Nine.** Melodrama with im- 
posing Are scene. 

i7«/aM0.— "The Darling of the Gods.** Imposing, interesting and weU 
acted. 

Broadway.— '"tht Silver Slipper.** Moderately good moslcal comedy. 

CVuifio.—" The Chinese Honeymoon.*' Moslcal comedy. Diverting. 

2>a/y*«.—'* The Billionaire."' See alMve. 

Empire.— Stott company in " The Unforeseen." Notice later. 

Oard€n,-%othervL in " Hamlet.** WeU produced and well 
acted. 

Herald Squart.—Hx, Mansfleld'i prodaeiloa nf *- Ju-^ 
lios Cesar. '^ Satisfactorily done. 

Knickerbocker.— '*ThtAlXMXOt Frleti(l*blp/^ with ^U 
Goodwin and Maxlne Elliott as co^t^r^. Nor gt^%U tiut 
amusing. 

Madimn S^tiartf.— Elizabeth Tyretj m" Gretna are«ii.'' i 
Notice later. 

Manhattan.—'' Mary of M&gdala.*' latetv&ttng 
version of the New Testament story. 

New ror*.— "When Johnny Coui**» Marching 
Home.** Fan and music of Ket>eUi4>Ti dnjn. 

Princ€M.—** Heldell)erg.'* RomutTir HlseTt;h of 
German student life. Weepy, batituiii^iiitf 

Savoy. — **Thei Girl with the G^^^^?n Ki^a' 
Mrs. Bloodffood in not the greatest of Cljde 
Pitch's society sketches. 

Victoria— UaW Calne's"The 
Eternal City *' in stage form. 
Fairly interesting. 

Wo/teclrV.— "The Sultan of 
Sulu.** See above. 

Weber and Fields' ft. — Bnr- 
lesque and vaudeville. The 
theatre is small and a few 
good seats are to be had from 
speculators at advanced prices. the sultan and thk colonbl^s DAueims. 




^r-M' 



LIFE 



55 




TUBK ABOUT U FAIB PLAY. 



Life's Dictionary of Interaa- 

tional Biography. Unal- 

phabetically Arranged. 

ALBERT EDWARD. 

T K these plutocratlo days we mast not depre* 
-^ cate too much the Inflaence of kings. Kings 
hare their nses as well as financiers and polltl* 
clans and brigadier-generals. The Inflaence of 
King Edward over Newport and upper Fifth 
Avenue can hardly be overestimated. 
This monarch was bom during the last cen- 



tury and attained the age of manhood without 
wearing a coat that didn't fit him or using his 
knife at the table wrongfully. At an early age 
he began to attract the attention of prominent 
actresses and rich Americans, and his social 
career was thereafter assured. He became the 
fashion, so to speak, and while his nephew Willie 
was going ta church and Sunday-school and 
learning how to be an understudy to the Divin- 
ity, Edward was bunching his horses and open- 
ing up jack pots with the proceeds of the India 
famine fund. 
Every great man owes much of his success to 



the women he has met. Thej 
have awakened his amblUons, 
given him oonfldence and spurred 
on bis Imagination. LUy Langtry 
did everything for Edward. Prob- 
ably to-day he wouldnt be the 
king he la If It hadn*t been for 
her. She patted him on the back 
at the right time and said: 
** Never mind, Eddie, If the Boer 
WKTiscomlnigon. Chirk up and 
be a man . 1 '11 stand by you while 
there's a cent left. '* And she was 
true to her word, for there wasn't 
a social centre In America that 
didn't feel the eflRects of her red- 
taUon of the *• Absent-Mlnded 
Beggar.'* 

As soon as Edward became 
King he determined upon a radi- 
cal change lu the administration 
of anairs. Cablegrams were sent 
to all parts of the world, and now, 
what Is the result? Almost every- 
where the cutaway coat Is taking 
the place of the frock. 

To trace the exciting adven- 
tures, hairbreadth escapes and 
momentous events that have 
crowded King Edward's life 
would be too much. Once he was 
within several miles of a naval 
battle, but seemed to bear a 
charmed life. Again at a cotil- 
lion he came near being sullb- 
caled, and during a yacht race 
was dreadfully near being blown 
overboard. But through all his 
calamities he has preserved a 
calm and cheerful exterior ; no 
doubt, because he Is a regular 
reader of Lira. 

King Edward, who was recently 
crowned by J. Plerpont Morgan 
and Charles Schwab, has com- 
mented upon the agreeable sensa- 
tions that were incident upon that 
occasion. 

<« It is pleasant,*' he said, *< that 
though some of my handsomest 
officers are In South Africa, soci- 
ety Is still abl^ to hold Ito head up 
and support me in my pressing 
duUes." 

His favorite occupations aret 
Cultivating American beauties, 
wearing bath robes, not talking to 
Sir Michael Hicks-Beach, and re- 
gretting that Alfred Austin Is poet 
laureate. 

Principal Works : A new shirt front, patent 
studs (racing and bosom), device for keeping 
down trousers, etc., etc. 




▲ GOOD SIOH. 



56 



LIFE 



TWO VIEWS. 





N Optimifit and a Pessimist met at a 

crossroads. 

The Optimist was dressed in 
dark, sombre clothes. No one 
would have known by his ap-. 
.pearance who he was. "For,** 
said he,** I don't need to advertise my- 
self. I am the real thing." 

The Pessimist, on the other hand, 
was giddy in the extreme, and flashed 
afar with brilliancy. **Por," sighed 
he, ** my appearance only serres to 
make me more melancholy. It is a 
constant reminder that all is vanity." 

Said the Optimist to the Pessimist : 

** My friend, I have never been able 
to understand your peculiar point of 
view, and I am intensely curious to 
know why we differ so radically on all 
subjects." 

•• The only way we can determine 
that," said the Pessimist, *' is to go 
along together, and I think I can easily 
convince yon that I am right." 

** Heaven forbid 1 " exclaimed the 
Optimist. " On the contrary, I shall 
be only too glad of the opportunity to 
bring you around to my side. In a 
beautiful world like this, I hate to 
think that any one can be so unhappy 
as yon are." 

And so they journeyed along to- 
gether. » ♦ » 

y\T was not long before they came 

/k|u^ to a house where two lovers 
M^ were spooning. 
■ **Now, here," said the Pes- 
I simist, *' is an excellent exam- 

M pie of what I mean. Just 
gaze upon this sickening sight. This 
fellow is kissing this girl, and promis- 
ing her all sorts of things that he 
cannot fulfill. She is drinking in every 
word and believing him. By and by 
they will get married, and wake up 
out of their dream. Ignorant of their 
ultimate fate, of the trouble and trial 
and agony that await them, they moon 
away their time* in hopeless disregard 
of the consequences. Did you ever see 
two such fools ? " 



f^^^ 



The Optimist laughed a cheery 
laugh. 

** My boy," he replied, "you don't 
know what you are talking about. 
Those two x)eople are not only su- 
premely happy at present, but I see 
absolutely no reason why they 
shouldn't keep it up. They are fitted 
for each other, and you know the real 
love, which undoubtedly possesses 
them both, never dies. Instead of 
waking up out of a dream, as you 
insinuate, they will develop greater 
possibilities for happiness all the time. 
I know it I I am sure of it ! " 
• • • 



^ J^ ^HEY passed on to a 

P*^\^^m church, where in silence 

C^^"^^ »* for a while they observed 

Jg the people going in to 

^1^ worship. 

"Doubtless," sneered the Pessimist, 
•'you will be prepared to uphold this 
sort of thing, when you must know 
these poor fools are worrying them- 
selves to death over something that 
they don't know anything about. If 
there is anything at all hereafter, I 
am convinced that it must be a Hell; 
for I have never yet seen any one who, 
judged consistently by the dogma of 
religion, didn't deserve to go there. 
They are right in calling themselves 
miserable sinners." 

** Your peculiar notions," said the 
Optimist, ** should not go unchallenged. 
Why, I cannot imagine a happier con- 
dition than that of these people. So 
sure are they of a joyous immortality, 
that the things of this world, even if 
they are termed trials by some, sit so 
lightly on them as to have no effect. 
So far from believing what you say 
about a Hell, I am thoroughly con- 
vinced that if there is anything needed 
in this beautiful world to make it any 
more beautiful, it lies in the blessed 
assurance that a Heaven awaits us all 
in the next one." 

They came soon to the house of a 
magnate. 



"I have purposely," remarked the 
Pessimist, *• brought you around thl« 
way, because I want to show you, if 
it is possible to get a grain of reason 
into your head, the most striking ex- 
ample of your so-called happiness. 
Now, here is a man, who, from the 
standpoint of this world, is enjo3ing 
himself. And yet, see how truly mis- 
erable he is. He is so restless that he 
cannot stop a momen t. He is bothered 
continually by cranks who want his 
money, and he works like a slave all 
the time trying to take care of and in- 
crease it. & is not only unhappy 
now, but he has absolutely nothing to 
look forward to, because there is 
nothing left to enjoy." 

** Nonsense I " exclaimed the Opti- 
mist. '* Ton amuse me greatly. I see 
you belong to that misguided crew 
who think just because he has money 
he cannot enjoy himself. In the first 
place, this man has achieved what the 
majority of men would sell their souls 
for. This in itself is a source of last- 
ing pleasure and satisfaction to him. 
Then his money doesn't bother him 
nearly so much as you imagine. He 
has x>ower, which is a supreme joy, 
and he is envied by every one, secretly 
or otherwise, which is no small thing. 
Not only this, but he really does a lot 
of good, which makes him all the hap- 
pier when he reflects that he is enabled 
to do 80 by his own ability. No, sir I 
You are mistaken ! " 

*• Well," said the Pessimist, " if it is 
impossible to convince you in this 
case, at least come with me to the 
slums, and I'll show you misery 

enough." 

• • • 

'HBN they had ar- 
rived there, the Pes- 
simist said : 

** Now, what do you 
think? Did you ever 
see a sight like this be- 
fore? Isn't it terrible? What hope 
is there for these poor wretches? 
There is no reason for me to dilate 
upon their despair. Just look at them 
yourself. It ought to be enough. ' ' 

** You poor old wet blanket," cheer- 
ily replied the Optimist. " Don't you 
know, in the first place, that things 
are never so bad as they look ? These 
people are not miserable. Clothes 
don't make the man. It is true that 




LIFE 



57 




they don't bathe every day, but 
vvhat of that? The real, true, 
genuine Bources of happiness they 
liossess much more than even if 
rhey were outwardly luxurious. 
In the first place, they are all un- 
selfish, which is the supremest 
joy of life. Look at that mother, 
bending over wnat you would 
T4^rm a squalid, ragged child. ' 
Liook at the light in her eyes. 
Lcx)k at the bare breast of that 
workman, how he bends to his 
task. He is creating something 
with his own hands. My friend, 
rhere is hardly any happiness 
compared with that." 

" I see, '* said the Pessimist, 

as he glowered upon his com- 

f panion, "that it's no use. 

We can do each other no 

good. Let us part." 

••Willingly," said the Op- 
timist. "If any one could 
ruffle me, I am sure you 
would." 

And Father Time, as he 
watched them going off in 
(opposite directions, whistled soft- 
ly to himself and said : 

** What a pity those fellows can- 
not get on together. For they are 
both right." l^om Masson, 



■ V -VT ALFRACTICE ? No I The 
-^ dose caused heart failure, 
of course, but the symptoms war- 
ranted it." 

'• I dare say. After all, the thing 
;hat saves us sinners is that there 
are so many ways of doing a 
thing wrong." 



«««i. 




** HOW MANY CAN I HAVBf* * 

"WBLL, HOW MANT CAW TOU GABBT AWAT WITH 
TOUf" 



MiuLadybug : qo a way, vb. buu- 

BLKBCB. YOU CAN*T FLIBT WITH ME. 
YOU ABS A BXOUUIB OLD HU1IBUO. 



LIFE 



\%Xf\')f'^MH\^ 




That Thomas A. Edison is deaf Is a fact well 
koowD to the nubile. Only his Intimate friends, 
however, are aware that In his case deafness Is 
more a psychological phenomenon than a physical 
condition. That which Interests him he can usually 
hear very well, but to that which does not Interest 
him he can be as deaf as the proverbial adder. 

Not long ago a specialist in diseases of the ear 
called upon Mr. Edison, and unfolded a plan of 
treatment which he was sure would restore his 
hearing. The Inventor listened to his story with 
patience, as It was informative on several points. 
To the proposition that he submit to treatment, 
however, Mr. Edison opposed an emphatic negative. 

"What I'm afraid of," said he, "Is that you 
would be successful. Just think what a lot of stuff 
I'd have to listen to that I don't want to hear ! To 
be a little deaf and be the only one who knows just 
how deaf you are has its advantages, and. on the 
whole, I think I prefer to let well enough alone." — 
Neto York Times. 



A MiBBOUBi farmer, whose hog had been killed 
by a train, and who Imagined himself to be some- 
thing of a poet, wrote these lines to the company's 
claim agent for settlement: 

My razorback strolled down your track 

A week ago to-day ; 
Your 29 came down the line 

And snufTed his llgh^ away. 

You can't blame me — the hog. you se^. 

Slipped through a cattle gate; 
So kindly pen a check for ten, 

The debt to liquidate. 

He was rather surprised a few days later to re- 
ceive the following: 

Old 29 came down the line 

And killed your hog. we know ; 

But razorbacks on railroad tracks 
Quite often meet wlih woe. 



Therefore, my friend, we cannot 

The check for which you pine. 
Just plant the dead ; place o'er his head 

"Here lies a foolish swine." 

— Milwaukee Evening Wi90on*in. 



A Blaiboowrxk man had married a natlre of 
Kirkcaldy. Some years later, when the woxqad was 
dying, she said to her husband, "John. I're been a 
good wife to you. and I want you to do me a faror." 

"Weel, 'oman, what is it?" 

"Weel, John, it's jist this, that ye'll bury me 
among my ain folk at Kirkcaldy." 

"Hoots, 'oman, it canna be ; I tell you it canna 
be." 

"Weel. John, if ye dinna tak' me to Kirkcaldy 
I'll haunt ye; my speerlt will haunt ye." 

"Aweel, if It comes to that. 'oman. I'll hae to 
do it; but I'll try ye in Blairgowrie flrat." — Ex- 
change. 



LiPB is for sale by all Newsdealers in Great Britain. The international News 
Company, Bream*s Bollding, Chancery Lane, London, E. C, England, Agbktb. 



Established 1823. 

WILSON 
WHISKEY. 



That's All I 



THE WILSON DISTILLING CO., 
Baltimore, Md. 



CHESTER. CR.EST. 

Nortli Fparth Ava^ Mamt Veraaa, N. Y. 

A quiet resort with every comfort, for 
men nervously disordered through dissipa- 
tion. Communications strictly confldential. 
Address O. S. Avery, Manager. Telephone 
—445 A. Mount Vernon. 



Fac-81ralle 
Signature ol 


TRY THEM FOR 

k Coughs, Colds, 
1 Asthma, Bronehttis, 
r Hoarseiifss, 
and Sore Throat 



Vp ngllaK Ala brawara laa^va tha 
^^ bottling of tKalr prodxict to 
oxitaldara— tha*** not tKa y^v^e>.f\a' 
wwv— tt>.f\d tKa raaxilt la tha^t 

EVANS' 
ALE 

la laa^ving aJ| otKara fa^r 
bahlnd— It la botUad by Ita 
n\akara'at tha bra^Mrary. 

Baaldaa, tKara'a a i 
Prioa-dlffaranoa ^vorth wh^ 
rioua atudy. 

Apply to the neareat dealer. 
C. H. EVANS dl SONS 
CataLbllaKad 1786 Hudaon^N.Y. 



"Tiie NAME B evetvnuNG.* 

Esterbrook 



on a pen 1: 
guarantee of 

E S T E 
FALCO 
the most 
pen in 
Over 150 
other styl 
every pu 
stationers 
Accept no^ 




an absolute 
its excellence 

\\ViO O Yi 

i'jNo. 048 is 

popula t^ 

[the world. 

varieties of 

to suit 

ose. All 

ave them. 

substitute. 



The Esterbrook 

N.J. ^ 



STra.PENCo 

M Jsna Slrti^ N* Y« 



NatioDal Eleotrio Vehioles 

Handsome, ffracefal, tboroaghly depend- 
able. Bailt for reliable, everyday senrloe 
and glTe It. Simplest In construction; safely 
and easily operated— the perfected aato- 
mobiles for business or pleasure. 

Write for <rar iUiutrated OAtslnfue thowlnf 
many new and Improred •leetrlo ftatnmobltei. 

liTIOIAL YIHICLI CO., 906 l.22d 8t ,IndiMt?oli8jiid. 



GUARANTY TR.UST COMPANY OF NEW YOR.K 

MUTUAL LIFE BUILDING, NASSAU, CORNER CEDAR STREET. 

LONDON OPPirKK 83 LOMBARD STREET, E. C. 00 ST. JAMES STREET. S. W. 

Fiscal Agents of tlie United States Government. Manila. Philippine Islands. Hong Kong, China. Depository of the GoDeni- 

ment of the PhUlpplne Islands, Manila 

Capital, $2,000,000. Surplus aad Undivided Profits, $5,180,000. 

INTRREST ALLOWED ON DEPOSITS subject to cheque or on cerdflcaie. 
Acts as Trustee for CorporaUons. Firms and Individuals: and as Guardian. Executor and Administrator: Takes entire 
charge of Real and Personal Estates : carefully selected secunries offered for investment. 
TUAVELEUS' LETTKIt.H OP CREDIT Aviillable Id nil part* of tb« world. 
COiTIinKRriAL LETTERS OP CREDIT INSUED. 
DRAFTS on all parts of Great Britain. France, Germany, China, and Philippines BOfTCillT and SOLD. 
WALTER 0. OAKMAN, President. ADRIAN ISELIN, JR , Vice President. 

GEORGE R TURNBULL. 2d Vice-President. HENRY A. MURRAY. 3d Vice-President 

WM. C. EDWARDS. Treasurer. JOHN GAULT. Manager Foreign Department. 

E. C. HEBBARD. Secretary. F. C. HARRIMAN, AssUtant Treasorer. 

R. C. NEWTON, Trust Officer. 
DI RECTO RS * 
George F. Baker. G. G. Haven. Augustus D. Jullllard, Walter G. Oakman, 

George S. Bowdoln. E. H. Harriman. James N. Jarvie. Henry H. Rogers. 

August Belmont, R. Somers Hayes. Richard A. McCtirdy, H. McK. Twombly, 

Frederic Cromwell. Charles R. Henderson. Levi P. Monon. Frederick W. VanderbUt, 

Walter R. Gillette. Adrian Iselln. Jr., Alexander E. Orr, Harry Payne Whitney. 

LondoD Commltiaes ARTHUR J. FRASER, Chairman: DONALD C. HALDEMAN. 



*MOLETTESddOZAR 



THE EVER FASHIONABLE PERFUME OF 
ORiZA-L.LEGRAND(arandPrizPari8l800) 




'LIFE- 

Why use 
poor cards 
when you 
can buy 

Bicycle 

Playing Cards 

They wear well. Sold by dealers. 
Popular price. 29 backs. Back 
shown is "Wheel." Order by name. 

The U. S. Playing Card Co. 
Cincinnati, U. S. A. 

We will send ITS-paf^e Condensed Hoyle 
lor 10c. stamps, If addressed to Dept 51. 



ONLY $600. 

DIRECT FROM THE FACTORY 




We have about a dozen of our superb 
HtUe Bteam carriages— '* The Toledo, 
Jr."— ready for immediate deliverv. We 
have never sold one for less than $800, but, 
for a while, we will sell these direct from 
the factory at $600. ** The Toledo. Jr." 
is strictly high grade and all right in every 
respect. Better act quick on this. 

We make steam. electHo and gaM>l«iie Mtomo- 
1llle^ each the acme of perfection in its clao. 
If you want expert adrlce on .antomoblle«, 
wrfte ns. We can mippbr any kind or c»P«^ 
Tehicle you want at a price that U right. Cat- 
alogue and yahiahle booklet free. 

The International Motor Car Co. 
3051 Central Avenue, TOLEDO, OHIO. 



Moki Hairdresser 




' Tetlent Ka.8 no sex 
a.nd Envy no gender.' 
Neither he^s 



Veuve Clicquot 

CHAMPAGNE 

a.n equa.1 — Try 
it and see. 



Go to winterless 

California 

Where roses grow outdoors at 
Christmas time, and there is always 
perfect weather. ^ , , _ , 

The luxurious California 
Limited will take you there m less 
than three days from Chicago. 

Finest dinmg-car service m the 
world. All vou could ask for m 
comfort, speed and scenery. Seventh 
season — new equipment. ^ ^ 

Hotel accommodations at principal 
resorts better than ever before. 

The California tour described In our 
books ; mailed for loc in sUmps. AddrMS 
General Passenger Office. Atchlson.Topeka 
& SanU Fe Raflway, Chicago. 

Santa Fe 



The only PURE and COBREGT ARTIFICIAL 
MINERAL WATERS sold In America to-day. 

CARBONIC, ARTIFICIAL VICHY. 
5ELTERS, CLUB SODA, Etc, 

are also put np In bottles for out of town 
delivery, and can be sent by freight or 
ex Dress to any part of the United States. 
Orders to 

CARL H. SCHULTZ 

Tel. U2 Madison 8q. 4a(M44 First Ave., N. Y. 



WILEYS. 



jy/ 



IS THE ONLY PtfERfftTION 
MADE EXPRESSLY FOR 

KITCHEN 
FLOORS 



-C 



:*tM *:tm Jir>iily it3foiirfielfpltpre«?nf*fithowcKisd/ 
(^vise 1 It ii ItnifliL. D&tUTnl tUi-iehi 1 L iMvrenti diU'C^ 
knd tllrt, tl*.M^ fc^ij vlih LiLiij!^ arid hwjpfltho I 

tiot a wAK^ vfvsh or \arcil4iif but an c ni kfi-i^ qow 1 

nrernntlaii -itujaQly thliiy in iht Tf orlJ t Nat wist | 

pfoyenl* lloor imm epottlQir, c*itorlti(r or loiiltnf 

wti h iiot griMiH or wa[ cr. K viji t & rrcu; s i^ iii i lU n ^ 

iu\K It. £<ipociilif adutpt^Ml for l.inoli'mna ■nil 

Oilcloths "nd tLo berttlilnff mod* for ALL H Alt D- 

Wi; )0 D FL4.x:J'HS. l5tiJd fe>- pbJ nt, li itra w are, arroeer/ , 

jiiad dppartmenii 0torTD i^vcryw litre, gAmpI* cmn by 

I Li ji il FIlE VL Brnd fur froL't d t^*r r 1 1 ftlTo boujs let. 

I. n* WILEY dt CO., Mfr«» 

i,^ SndbUTT SI. 



Q 



ABBOTISorIginai 

Angostura Bitters. 



JAflAICA 




Sf%''i?Swest indies 

An ideal spot Id wbf cb to spend a winter's vacation 
and avoid all the extremes of the northern climate. 

UNITED FRUIT CO/S 
STEAMSHIP LINES 

operate weekly between BOSTON and PHILADEL- 
PHIA and JAMAICA, the magnincent twin-screw 
U. S. Mail Steamships : 
Admiral Dewey Admiral Sampson 

Admiral Schley Admiral Parragut 

Salliags Weekly froM Boston and Philadelphia 
Fare for round trip, inclading stateroom accommo- 
dations and meals, $76 ; one way, $40. 

Send fbr onr beantiral booklet whether joa eoatoM- 
plate the trip or not 

UNITED FRUIT COMPANY 



Pier 5, North Wharves, 
PHILA. 



Lonff Wharf, 
BOSTON 



FqU Information and Tickets of Local Agent 



• LiJ-t: 



B?^ 



^■""DuR fooLlSH, 

gNTEMPO^Af 



Customer: Have you any problem novels? 

Bookseller: No, but here Is a treatise on In- 
tegral calculus which Is said to contain some novel 
problems. — Reeky Mountain News. 

For convenience, really superior hotel service 
for select patronage, and climate, there Is nothing 
for New Yorkers quite like Lakewood. New Jersey. 
Laurel House. 
Laurel-in-the- Pines. 

Two little girls, aged, respectively, six and eight 
years, were discussing religious matters. The older 
one said to her sister: "Which would you rather 
do, live, or die and go to heaven?" 

"Why," the young one said, "I would rather 
live." Whereupon the elder one burst out with the 
emphatic question. "Sarah B., what does your re- 
ligion amount to?" — The Christian Register. 

Madison Square Garden 

Automobile Show, 

January 17th to 24tb. 

Admission 60 cento. 

Bnoland Is an aristocracy supported by plun- 
der. — Schoolmaster. 

ELECTRIC-LIGHTED TRAIN TO CALIFORNIA. 
The "Overland Limited" via Chicago and North- 
Western, Union Pacific, and Southern Pacific Rail- 
ways, has electric reading lamps in every berth; 
long distance telephone service, buffet-library cars 
(with barber and bath), compartment observation 
cars, and dining cars. All agents sell tickets via 
tbl«( route. 

Mrs. Flanagan: I want a pair of shoes for 
my boy. 

Salesman: French, kid, ma'am? 
"No, sir, Irish kid." — Schoolmaster. 

Old Point Comtort, Va. Easy to go. Hard to return. 
Send to the Chamberlin for one of their handsome bookleto. 



A WOMAN on the death of her husband tele- 
graphed to a distant friend: 

"Dear Joseph is dead. Loss fully covered by 
insu ranee. ' ' — Tit- Bits. 

When you are at the Olnb, drink a nice cold bottle of 
OooVs Imperial Extra Dry Champagm, An ezhilaratiog 
beverage. 

Drink and the world drinks with you, but set- 
tle the bill, and you settle alone. — Marysville (Mo.) 
Tribune. 



The dinner In honor of the birthday of Thomas Paine, 
arrange(\ to be held at the Hotel Marlborough, Broad- 
way and 36tb Street, on the evening of January 20th, 
promises to be a grand alDstlr. Over one hundred seato 
have already been subscribed for, and perhaps only two 
hundred C/in be accommodated. Those wishing to attend 
should arrange for seato with Mr. Edwin C. Walker, 214 
West 14ad Street, New York 

"Yes, he's given up the political Job he had." 
"The idea! why, I understood it was a regular 

little sinecure." 

"So it was, but after the last election It became 

a little insecure." — Washington Star. 





MILWAUKEES 

lARGEST BREWERS 

Over One Million Barrels 

of Schlitz Beer Sold In One Year 



This makes us, by over 
one hundred thousand barrels, 
Milwaukee's largest brewers, 
and Milwaukee, as you know, is 
the most renowned brewing 
center in the world. 

This is Bow It Was Done 



For fifty years we have doubled 
the necessary cost of our brew- 
ing that Schlitz Beer might be pure. 

We cool Schlitz Beer tn plate 

glass rooms, and all the air that 

touches it comes through filters. 



We age our beer for months before 
we market it. That is why Schlitz 
Beer doesn't cause biliousness. 

We filter Schlitz Beer through 
wonderful filters, then sterilize 
every bottle after it is sealed. 



The Beer that Made Milwaukee Famons 



OLD CROW RYE 

for PURITY and QUALITY 

It is a Straight Kentucky Hand-MoLde, Sour Mash Whiskey 

IT HAS NEVER BEEN EQUALED. Guaranteed by the 
distillers and ourselves to be SOLD ABSOLUTELY PURE 



H. B. KIRK (SL CO. 



Between New York and Chicago In 24 hours 
Via New York Centrai-Lake Shore Route 



Sole Bottlers, 



NEW YORK 



*^LAKE SHORE LIMITED- 



tt 



PRKSS or THK J. W. PRATT CO.. NKW YORK. 



•TTFE- 



}tMkMtMiM^0Miflif^^ 



^ 



The Inner Man 



A delightful surprise, a charm 
to the palate and cheer and 
comfort to the inner man is 
found in the perfection of 



Hunter 
Whiskey 



S<dd fttall flrst-claM cafes and by Jobben. 
WM. LAN AH AM A SON, Baltimore. Md. 



(itt«i»iai«i«i«iiMUmi|lMi 



GOUT & RHEUMATrSWi 



Otttbi Great English Remedy 

BLAIR' 3 PiLLs\ 

Sal«t5iir*.Eff«ctlv«. 50a d. $1 
DEUGOrfiTS. Of 2U Wfllifttn St. N, Y. 



IQlclieaUtensils 

YRADE MJLRR 




ARK SAF£. 



NO POISON 

Has Ever Been Found la 
the Bnamel of 

Agate Nickel- 

_StecIJWafc 
The BLUE LABEL 

Protected by Decision of 
United StMtet Coort, pasted 
on OTerr piece, 

PROVES it. 

If rabatitutes are offered, 
write na. New Booklet Fiee, 
A«at« Nickel-Steel Wart^issold 
by the leading Department 
and Booaefamuhlnflr Stores. 

If lance A Oro^ean Mffp. CJo., 
New Yorlc Boston, Ohioaco. 




TO CALIFORNIA g;s;/ifeS»i?„ 

»Ji^£e'l«l«t* «t S trip fc] wlhtrrl'vi CinfoTnt* OTtr Ibl 
tVA^^TA rl. flD tta« EiitdHoua, €«liriini(» T.fiiiiti^tl, ^F^i^ah 

P<i)Etf.)iM ftbciuttirmtKl Cmijau *if At! i<^rt« oiAf ltd Jtjr Hi *^^. 



Pabsi beer 

is aSmm putt 

Brewed from carefully selected barley and hops ^ never, permitted to 
leave the brewery until properly aged. 




" Ifiuain Old BrudT Hide fm Win." 

-Medical Press (London), Aug, 1899. 

MARTELL'S 
THREE STAR 
BRANDY 

AT ALL BARS AND RESTAURANTS. 




The Highe9t Type ef French Champagne 
CODMAN & HALL CO. 

Agsnts for ths U, 8. 
BOSTOH. - - . MASS. 



SHAVING 





You'll be comfortable aboard 

The Golden State Limited 

Don't make any mistake about that U*s that kind of a 
train. 

There's a diaer^of course, a buffet-smoker, an observatton 
car, a compartment sleeper, and a bath room with hot 
and cold water, soap, and real bath to^irels. 

Less than three days Chicago to L03 Angelei- 
Through cars to Sanla iiarbara and San Fran* 
ciaco. Electric Tights ; electric fan^ ; barber 
shop ; Booklovers' Library. Lowest altitUiieb. 
Run* over the El Paso-Rock Island route — ihe 
most southerly line across the continent. Cut 
out this ad. and mail it, with name and address, 
to this office, and a beauttfully UJustrated book 
about California will be sent free* 



Sebastian, P.T.M., Chicago, IH. 



Rock Island 

Syslem 



m * f 



All RoacJs Alike to 

The Oldsmobile 

The motor carriage thai 6oc» noi need to be stored for wi fiicr« 
Any day and every season 6nd£ this fa%'f>ri|e Ruoabaut reajf 

for practical u»e. Duiii 10 run aW ^^^j^j iA 

Ample protection afforded by the leather or rubber top and 
storm apron> Operating levers entirely under cover. 

Every machine rvow leaving the factory is equipped with the 
1903 improvements, so that the Oldsmobile ia in advance of tht 
season and ahead of competition. 

In the 1000 lbs, and under class in ihe New York-Boston 
Reliability Run four Oldsmobilcs obtained first-class certificates. 
One machine completed the course with an absolutely perlect 
record, being the only automobile in this class to qualify for the 
highest award— the President'! Cup, 

S i mpler a nd stron gc r than ever, No complicated roochinery* 
No multiplicity of parts, A^^»ikin^ h^ itfaUk ^ui tk^ rtm4. 

PRICE $650 

OftU oa auf orour ^ belting Agonta m wftie f&r l]lDStt«ted Imot: «o t^mM* 



Olds Motor Works, Detroit, Mich. 




VOLUME XLL 



NEW YORK, JANUARY 22, 1903. // NUMBER 1056, 

Ktiterea »t ihft Sew Yort Poat Office aa Sfcoad^^lass ^%i\ Maner. ^ 

Cfip^ right, imi£lif liiPB Puiiij 

COLl£(i£ 




\-cic 



IT r- 






, Ti r 






'^ 



^^.> 




\ 



^' OEAynMA^ 1 AM riVE V£ABd OLl* TO-MORBOW, A>D I'M QOIKQ TO HAV« A CAKE WITH F(VK CAJWDLES OU ITi" 

"what would yoo j*fj rg" rnu wemb rive hundhku a^d rivEp a^i^K me?^' 

'^T'D have FtKK^OKKS." 



UNOCW THC ACT OW 1««1. 



LIFE 



THE PERFECT PlANO PLAYER 



mm 



s the on/v one which a 
woman can operate 
without fat igtie^ and 
is the oitly piano 
player whose touch 
is absolutely no?!- 
mechanical. We 
prove all we claim if 
you give us the op- 
po^tunit}^ Address: 

Farrand Organ Co,, Dcpt. L, 

DETROIT. MICH. 



Morton Trust Company 

38 NASSAU STREET, NEW YORK 

Capital, $2,000,000 

Surplus and Undivided Profits, - $5,815,982 

OFFICERS: 
LEVI P. MORTON, President 

THOMAS F. RYAN. Vice-President 

JAMES K. CORBlfeRE. 2d Vice-Prest. 
H. M. FRANCIS. Secretory 

G. L. WILMERDING, Asst. Secretary 

H. B. BERRY, Trust Officer 

EXECUTIVE COMMITTEE: 
Levi P. Morton Joseph C. Hendrix 

Thomas F. Ryan Tames N. Jarvie 

Edward J. Berwind George Foster Peabody 

G. G. Haven Jacob H. Schiff 

William C. Whitney 



JAMAICA 




5"pS»sswest indies 

An Ideal spot In which to ipend a winter*s vacatioQ and avoid all the eztremet 
of the northern climate. 

UNITED FR.UIT CO/S 
STEAMSHIP LINES 

operate weekly between BOSTON and PHILADELPHIA and JAMAICA, the 
matniiflcent iwin-^crew U. 8. Mail Steamahipa: 

Admiral Deway Admiral Schley Admiral Sampaoo Admiral Parraprt 

Salllagt Weeiil J froM Baatoa aad Philadelphia 

Fare for round trip, including atateroom accommodations and meals, |7S: 
one way, $40. 

Bead for oar beaatifkl hoohlet whether joa eoateMplato the trlperaet 

UNITED FRUIT COMPANY 

PtM- 5. North Wharves, PHILA. Laaf Wharf, BOSTON 

Fall Information and Tickets of Local Afcent 



WASSERMANN BROTHERS 

STOCK BROKERS 

40 EXCHANGE PLACE, NEW YORK 

Members of cf{^ York Stock Exchange 



BRANCH OFFICES: 

753 Fifth Avenue (Plaza Bank). 

Windsor Arcade, corner 46th St. and 5th Ave. 

Astor Court (Waldorf-Astoria Hotel). 

Imperial Hotel. 

5 West 26th St., opposite Martin's Restaurant. 

Fifth Avenue Hotel. 



AT .ALL 

FOUNTAINS 



y/im. STOMAOIS 

XrLLASANT d AGKIEABU BEVERAGI> 
ARZ^IOUR €. COi^lEANy 



c M I C J>^G o 



SOU) 

BY 

DKUGGLyXJ 



LIFc^ 






^M'^^ 



/DGF, M^^^^• 



65 




^i.?;?^i^AA-^ uvv^,!C»C f:5 r; 



^V t< 






^.^/,: 
.•^•?;! '-v'"' 

P?-^;/.'-'." 



THE STORY WHEN MOTHER HEARD IT. 



«6 



LIFE 




•» H'kiie there is Life there's Hope."' 

VOL. XLl. JAN. 22. 1908. No. 1066. 

10 WMT THIItTT-FlBaT ST., NEW TORE. 



Pabllstaed every ThurMlay. i&OO a year In ad 
▼aooe. PosUge to foreign oonntrlee In the Po»u] 
UnlOD, 91.04 a year extra, etlnsle current copies, 
10 oenU. Back nombers, after three months from 
date of publication, 35 cents. 

No contribution will be returned unless 
accompanied by stamped and addressed 
envelope. 

The illustrations in Life are copyrighted ^ 
and are not to be reproduced. 

Prompt not ideation should be sent by sub- 
scribers of any change ot address. 




rpHE Indianola post- 
-^ office incident in- 
vitb'^ disonssion. In- 
diauolii is in Mississippi. 
The [lOBtmistress who 
bad \\v\A office there for 
uine years and had 
given satisfactory 
service was a 
negress. In- 
spired appar- 
ently by the 
prevailing en- 
thusiasm i n 
the South for 
white-man government, some of the 
citizens of Indianola invited her to 
resign. It was reported that she was 
threatened with personal discomfort 
unless she did resign. That has been 
denied. Anyhow, she was gently, 
perhaps, but firmly requested to resign, 
and did resign, and went out of town to 
recover her spirits. These proceedings 
displeased the Postmaster-General, 
and, with the approval of the President 
and Cabinet, he suspended the post- 
office at Indianola altogether, and had 
the mail for that place sent to another 
town inconveniently distant, much to 
the discomfort of Indianola. 

Now it is a grievous thing for a town 
to be deprived of its post-office. More- 
over, the chief end of postmaster or 
postmistress is to give satisfaction to 
the community served, and the fact 
that a postmistress's complexion is not 
of a shade acceptable to the patrons of 
her office is a fact that should be con- 
sidered when it comes time to make a 
new appointment. Indianola is ex- 
tremely grieved to have its post-office 



closed, and we all feel for her, but 
the Postmaster-General maintains that 
he cannot afford to allow the Post- 
Office employees to be terrorized. **We 
terrorize nobody," says Indianola, and 
so the case stands, and the South 
doesn't like it. The appointment of 
Mr. Crum (colored) to be Collector of 
the Port of Charleston has also worried 
the Southern brother, and we hear 
daily that the South, which made great 
strides in brotherliness while McKinley 
was President, has been repeatedly af- 
fronted by Roosevelt, and is going to 
be solid and hostile again and flock by 
itself. This is pretty sad. It makes it 
appear that President Roosevelt has 
made mischief. It is not quite certain 
to the dispassionate observer that the 
punishment of Indianola has fitted the 
crime, but everywhere in the South 
and in both parties the movement to 
shut out negroes from all political in- 
fluence and from all offices has lately 
made rapid advance, and it is at least 
pardonable in a Republican adminis- 
tration that it should feel constrained 
to demonstrate that, so far as the 
Federal Government is concerned, the 
rights and privileges of negro citizens 
are still going to be respected. That 
the President has offended the South 
is obvious, and it is a pity. But that 
he has antagonized it is not obvious. 
It looks rather as if he was the victim 
of changing conditions, and the rapid 
development in the white population 
of the South of the belief that it is the 
only population in the South the exist- 
ence of which it is proper for the 
Government to recognize. 



i®)^::.^, 



STIRRED by testimony given before 
the Coal Strike Commission as to 
hardships attending the eviction of 
certain miners' families from houses 
belonging to the Markles, Mr. John 
Markle has been at the pains to publish 
a long statement of the relations of 
his company to its employees. He 
explains, among other things, why 
the evicted miners were evicted, de- 
clares that they had ample notice, that 
they were advised by the Mine Work- 
ers' attorney not to move out, and that 



no special reasons were known to the 
company for not evicting them. Bir. 
Markle thinks that the union inrhich 
advised the men not to move shoiild 
have looked after them. His explana- 
tion clears him of the charge of in- 
tentional harshness, and his general 
statement leaves a strong impression 
that the Markle miners, at least, had 
no just occasion to strike. The publi- 
cation of such a statement indicates 
that some of the coal operators care 
nowadays for public opinion, and are 
willing to take some trouble to famish 
means to form it intelligently. 

The testimony of non-union miners 
before the Commission has g^ven due 
prominence to the hardships endured 
by men who worked through the strike, 
and to the failure of the authorities to 
protect them. It is pretty plain that 
the union miners relied on terrorism 
to make their strike successful, and 
that there was no resolute purpose on 
the part of the State and local authori- 
ties to stop violence and protect men 
who wanted to work. The Commission 
is doing a very important work in 
bringing out the facts. Interest in its 
proceedings is kept active by the high 
cost and scarcity of coal. The lesson of 
the coal strike is being more thoroughly 
rubbed in than any lesson of the kind 
the American public has ever had to 
learn. If coal at from twelve to twenty 
dollars a ton can bring it home to the 
American consciousness that it does 
not pay to let either workmen or cor- 
porations defy the law, the service 
rendered will be cheap at the price. 




/CONGRESSMEN, Senators and pos- 
^^ sibly Presidents seem nowadays 
to have very vague notions as to the 
limitations of their job. An impulsive 
Congressman from Indiana, named 
Griffith, has introduced a bill limiting 
private fortunes to ten million dollars, 
and confiscating any excess for the 
benefit of the Federal Treasury. Go to, 
Mr. Griffith ! Ten millions is not 
enough to have. What would be- 
come of enterprise if money-makers 
were limited to a mere competence ? 



•LIFE 




-Jiw^^-^ 



' LIT JOT BB UNCONFINED.'* 



Society. 




R. AND MRS. MERGER HOGG think of taking 
the entire first tier of boxes for the opera next 
season. Mrs. Hogg says she loves mnsic. 

Mrs. Groundfloor Jones was confined to her 

palatial residence on upper Fifth Avenue last 

Thursday for several hours. She felt a toothache 

coming on. But, fortunately, it did not come. ' 

Arizona papen please copy. 

^ma Mr. and Mrs. Goshwatta Pyle may 

^r ""^ change their breakfast hour this winter. 

But nothing is fully decided as yet. 

She is a cousin of the Hon. Ennyole Figure. 

Fashionable society is making a great pet of Mrs. Shaidie Ppast. 

Mr. F. Somewhat Punkyns is cne of her warm admirers. So is Billy 

Ollfur Stile. 

Mrs. BuUifat Inkum never wears the same shoes twice. She was one 
of the Heeps of Boston. They have always been fashionable. 

Monroeism and Monarchy. 
"\/f ONARCHY is inimical to civil liberty because it lodges the political 
-^ -*" power with one man. 

But is Diaz less a monarch in fact than Maximilian was ? 

Is Castro less a monarch than Edward VII. ? 

Finally, is Wilhelm II. more a monarch than our own President? 

The Monroe Doctrine is pretty foolish, but it sounds big, and we 
are bumptious. 




' SAT, 1>AD, WHBRB DO BAD BOT8 GO WBBN TBBY DIE f '* 
**THBr GO TO A TOBRID ZONK, MY SON." 



* * T^ID you have many Christmas presents 
-*-^ given you?" 
** Yes, but I bear no malice.*' 

rniME is ungallant : it tells on a woman. 



«8 



•LIFE 





/ Uei-ary Values and Other Papers^ by 
'^ John Burroughs, offers us the oppor- 
tunity of spending some quiet hours in 
informal and intimate companionship with 
a delightful mind. Such invitations are few 
nowadays. Most volumes offer either to 
amuse us or to cram us with desiccated in- 
formation. Mr. Burroughs talks with us, 
gives us of his individuality, offers us a 
mental hospitality at once unforced and 
charming. (Houghton, Mifflin and Com- 
pany. $1.10.) 

In the study of wild life with the camera 
the past few years have seen opened a new 
field, at once of popular interest and of 
scientific value. Mr. A. Radclyffe Dugmore 
has been a pioneer and is still a leader in 
this field, and in Mature and the Camera he 




SUGGESTIONS FOR ARTISTIC STREET SiGNS. 

rOB THB GITIDANCB OF VISTTTNO STBANOXBS. 



outlines his methods and aims. Mr. Dug- 
more is singularly free from any hint of 
pose. His explanations are simple, wholly 
sincere and eminently practical, and his 
results vouch for their effectiveness. His 
book is of real value to all workers in this 
branch of photography. (Doubled ay, Page 
and Company. $1.35.) 

We do not advocate the soft-drink habit 
in fiction, but to those who like the literary 
ice-cream soda of historical romance we can 
recommend the product of Francis Lynde's 
fountain, The Master of Appleby It has 
the natural fruit flavor of old Virginia, the 
cool tinkle of rapiers and the piquant effer- 
vescence of love triumphant over villains. 
(The Bowen - Merrill Company, Indian- 
apolis. $1.50.) 

One dislikes to say disagreeable things 
about Alfred Austin. It seems like kicking 
a man some one else has knocked down. 
But there is really nothing pleasant to say 
about The Haunts of Ancient Peace, his 




third sequel to The Garden TJuU I Love, 
The old characters go upon a driving tour, 
and Mr. Austin has preserved for us, he 8ays« 
the cream of their conversation. Alas I and 
Alas I (The Macmillan Company. $1.50.) 

Mrs. Sarah P. McL. Green's new book, 
Winsloui Plain, is delightful. It purports 
to be a man's reminiscences of his boyhood 
in a New England village and a picture of 
his friends there. Mrs. Green handles those 
good old elements, humor and pathos, with 
a charming delicacy. She is never boister- 
ous and never maudlin. (Harper and 
Brothers. $1.50.) 

Bichard Hume is a novel by T. B. War- 
nock, dealing with Iowa life at an unnamed 
date and belonging to the class which de- 
pends wholly upon plot for interest. And 
the plot is that hoary plot where everything 
is explained when the villain turns out to 
be the girl's brother. (R. F. Fenno and 
Company. $1.25.) 

J. B. Kerfoot, 



LIFE 



69 






Coal Mining. 

p H E coal 
-*- mines are 
owned b y 
widows and 
orphans. 
They are 
worked by 
slaves. 
Moreover, there 
are the opera- 
tors. When it chances that the widows 
and orphans mnrmnr, and complain 
that their dividends are too small, the 
operators exclaim : 

** What ! Would you take the bread 
from the mouths of the poor slaves in 
the mines? '* 

And if it falls out that the slaves 
would have more wages, the operators 
protest : 

*• What I *Would you take the bread 
from the mouths of the widows and 
orphans whose slender means are in- 
vested in these mines? '* 



It is their cleverness in working the 
widows and the orphans and the 
slaves that has won for these persons 
the name of operators. 



•* T NEVER could understand why a 
-*- woman puts anything on her 

face. She deceives no one but herself." 
"Isn't that enough?" 



Booky Bits. 

A BOOK in the hand is worth two 
■^^^ in the press. 

Too many books spoil the trade. 

Many hands make light verse. 

Circumstances alter bookcases. 

A f:ood name is rather to be chosen 
than great characters. 

Dead authors tell no tales. 

It's a long page that has no turning. 

Authors will happen, even in the 
best-regulated families. 

Fine leathers do not make fine 
words. 



Where there's so much puff, there 
must be some buyer. 

A gilt - edged volume needs no 
accuser. 

A profit is not without honor save 
on a best-selling book. • 

The love of sequels is the root of all 
evil. 

A publisher is known by the Co. he 



Don't look a gift book in the bind- 
ing. 

Two Vanrevels are better than one. 

Some are born Corelli ; some achieve 
Corelli ; and some have Corelli thrust 
upon them. 

Ye cannot serve Grood English and 
Mammon. 

An ounce of dialect is worth a pound 
of royalties. 

Epigrams cover a multitude of sins. 

A new boom sweeps clean. 

Carolyn Welh. 



70 



LIFE 




The Answer. 

A MAN, desperately 
in love, once 
sought a philoso- 
pher for a cure. 

**I have had," 
said the man, 
** about all I can 
stand of this sort 
of thing. Between 
terrific quarrels 
and midnight 
make - iips, I ' m 
about dead. I want 
[ to withdraw with 
' honor and a whole 
skin." 
** Your case is a 
pathetic one," said 
the philosopher. "My 
advice to you is to study the workings of your own mind. 
You will find then that what you deem real is only, after 
all, the phenomena of being. This creature that you love is 
in reality only an illusion, a subjective projection, and exists 
only in terms of empirical consciousness. After awhile, by 
reflections of this sort, you will rise above such folly." 

So the man went away and began to reflect upon the 
transcendental aesthetic, and the properties of space and 
time. But he found the relief was only temporary, for when 
the girl came and put her arms around his neck, he was as 
badly off as ever. So in despair lie went to a wise man. 

** I'm in love," he said, *' and don't like it. I want to be 
calmer and do things worth while." 

** Study astronomy," said the wise man. ** After you 

have been at it for awhile your own insignificance will 

appall you. You and your girl will fade away. Then when 

you come back to earth, take care to bring only yourself." 

So the man looked at the stars. 

But there was the girl behind him, with her soft hands 
in his hair, and at last he gave it up. ** What are a few 
picayune planets," he cried, "compared with her caresses ? ' ' 
And then he was obliged to acknowledge that still he was 
not his own master. 
And after the next quarrel he went to an alchemist. 
"Mix me a drng," he said, <* that 
will cure me of love." 
The alchemist smiled. 
** My friend," he rephed, ** to be 
candid with you, a great many fine 
stories have been floating around 
about sundry old potions for this 
purxx)6e, but they are all quack reme- 
dies. The only cure I know of is 
prussic acid." 

The man smiled grimly. ** I don't 
want to die quite yet," he said. "I want 
to get rid of this love feeling. It*s the 
worst agony I ever experienced. It 
blows hot and it blows cold." 
"Well," said the alchemist, ** go 




and ask that clown over yonder. Maybe he'll tell you." 

So the man went to the clown and told his story. 

** Want to know the answer? " the clown grinned, as he 
puffed a machine-made cigarette. 

** Yes, yes," said the man, impatiently. 

" Marry the girl," said the clown. Xoni Mdsaon. 

Infelicity in High Places. 

"OERUN. — As the Crown 
-^ Prince of Weisnichtwo 
was beating his wife yesterday, 
her Highness lost her temper. 
The Prince was greatly 
shocked, but had the presence 
of mind to summon a patrol 
wagon. 

It now appears that the 
Princess has always been 
wayward. The story goes 
that within a week after her 
marriage she refused to 
braid her hair in the form 
of a trunk handle for her hus- 
band to drag her about by. 

The Prince bears up won- 
derfully. He appeared in 
public to-day and was en- 
thusiastically cheered by the 
populace. 

Rome.— The report that 
the Vatican will intervene 
to reconcile the Grown 
Prince of Weisnichtwo and 
his Princess is denied. The opinion here is that the 
Princess is not fitted to sustain the exalted responsibilities 
to which she has been called. 

Character. 

/CHARACTER la a by-product.— TToodrOTr WUson, 
^ Mankind have always been more or less busy, it is 
likely. 
What have they wrought ? 
Nothing permanent, except character. 

So fleet the works of men, back to their 

earth again, 
Ancient and holy things fade like a dream. — 

The Tower of Babel has vanished. 
The Pyramids are vanishing. But 
whatsoever of character the Baby- 
lonians and the Egyptians built re- 
mains and will remain. 

The saying that character is a by- 
product is smart. A successful pork- 
packer saying it would be voted clever. 
But a president of Princeton 

This is truly an era of remarkable 
things. 




V 



■rUiVr-tfiWERt- 



THS ULKD OT TR« XTDNTOHT SON. 



'T^HE man who shrinks from attract- 
ing attention should marry. 



LIFE 



7X 




O'^t^L^i-f^-'^a 



Shade of Mizabeth: splbndbub osx I had wx but kkown or this wanton conceit during oub reign on earth, our bister of Scotland 

HAD not stood SO LONG IN OUR WAT I 




THE LUXURY OF 1 



■/ 



E- 




AVEL IN NEW YORK. 



74 



LIFE 



i f T i I I I < I f r 





Once More to the War. 

HE belligerent spirit is surely 
abroad in the land. Again 
we have soldiers, uniforms, bugle- 
calls, the rattle of musketry and 
the other paraphernalia of war, this 
time in a rather loosely constructed 
dramatization of George W. Cable's 
* * The Cavalier." Union soldiers and 
Confederate are mixed up in a variety of 
complications, all centering about the cy- 
clonic career of Charlotte Jhjurand, imper- 
sonated by Julia Marlowe. She is a vigorous 
young woman, and her doings in this play 
are made of such great importance that if 
she had been a real person in the days of 
the Rebellion she would have been *'a 
bigger man than ol' Grant.'' See didn't 
mind sleeping in a car filled with ammuni- 
tion ; saving an ambulance train loaded 
with Con federate money was a mere baga- 
telle to her, and incidentally she carried on 
a very strenuous love aflfair with a military 
gentleman engaged in the arduous duties of 
standing well with the armies of both sides 
to the conflict. Naturally this led to doubts 
in the mind of a young woman devotedly 
attached to the interests of the Confederacy 
and to more or less heart-aching for every 
one concerned. Mr. Worthing impersonates 
this character, and it is to be confessed that 
he appears to better advantage in the dress- 
clothes of the carpet knight than in the 
accoutrements of a warrior bold. Julia 
Marlowe does not seem to be gouig forward 
in her art ; in fact, there are evidences of 
retrogression not pleasant to those of us 
who have so often seen her at her very 
delightful best. She seems to lack enthu- 
siasm, ^nd both her sprightliness and pathos 
have become somewhat mechanical. The 
spontaneity which was one of her greatest 
attractions appears to have become forced. 
Her eyes are among her strongest weapons, 
but she resorts to the use of them until one 
almost wishes she would not try so hard to 
make them expressive. All this does not 
mean that Julia Marlowe has ceased to be 
an accomplished and attractive artist, but 
that she is not in this part at her best. One 
might almost imagine that she herself is not 
altogether pleased with the inconsequential 
play provided for her. The remaining mem- 
bers of the cast are competent, and the play 
goes along with a rush and a swing and a 
bustle thoroughly martial. 




i HE frequent repeti- 
uon of the American 
soldier in oorrent attrac- 
tions may be the result of 
^ oar new world-conquer- 

% ^^^^J^^yfe ^"1? ambitions; it may be 
^H^'^\4i^ [ f»at the time is j ust now 

ripe for using the Civil 
War as dramatic material, or it may be 
simply a case of thought transference 
among playwrights, actors and managers. 
Waves of this sort are not unusual in the 
theatrical business, and might be worthy of 
investigation by some of the workers in the 




JUUA MIRLOWB IN " TBI CAVALIEB." 

field of psychical research. *'The Cavalier " 
is a very pronounced example of the war 
play, and not an entirely satisfactory one, 
although it is far from uninteresting to 
witness. 

• • • 

Xkw York, January 10, 1903. 

"EDITOR OF LIFE: Your 
paper is good, your direct- 
ory for theatre-goers is 
better, but best of all is 
your frequent mention of 
the connivance of the 
'* chosen " people with the 
ticket speculators — in 
their employ. This evening at 8.30, I went 
to Weber and Fields's. Box office said no 
seats. Speculator offered seat C 8 in bal- 
cony, first for $1.75, then for $1.50, latter 
being box office rate, as it was late. I de- 
clined. Came back in five minutes, or per- 
haps ten. Speculators all gone. Went to 
box office. *' Have you a single seat for a 
dollar?" "Yes." And they gave me seat 
C 8 in the balcony. Quai-e. — 1. Can you 
explain how the speculator eot it ? 2. Then 
how the box office got it back again ? 3. And 
why the box office sold it for a cut rate? 
When I first saw the speculators they had a 
lot of seats and the box office none. On my 
return the speculators must have had no 
seats, for they had disappeared, but the box 





office had quite a lot. But it is a small 
house and, besides, " they need the money." 
Yours devotedly, E. Z. Mabk. 

From our correspondent's signature we 
obser^-e that he belongs to the family from 
which managers who do not deal fairly with 
their patrons derive their largest income. 
If all the E. Z. Marks in New York de- 
clined to be imposed upon, swindling 
managers would be driven out of businese. 
• • • 

^ HE programmes at the New 
York theatres are, with one 
or two exceptions, a disgrace 
to a metropolis. They are 
cheap, inartistic, inconvenient 
to handle, and their poor ink 
is a menace to delicste gloves and gar- 
ments. After a Sabbath day's Journey 
through a mass of badly printed and ineffect- 
ive advertisements one finds the programme 
proper, if one is lucky enough not to have 
overlooked it. Honorable exceptions to 
this state of affairs are to be found at Daly's 
and the Manhattan Theatre. 

Metcalfe. 

LIFE'S CONFIDENTIAL GUIDE TO THE 
THEATRES. 
Academy qf Music. — ReligloQS and scenic 
melodrama, " The Ninety and Nine/* Melodrama 
with imposing Are scene. Worth seeing. 

^«/a«eo.— Japanese tragedy, '' The Darling of 
the Gods.** Artistic and impressive. 

Broadway.— ''The Silver Slipper.** Ifosical 
comedy of average merit. 

Casino.—"* The Chinese Honejmoon.** Ifosical 
comedy. Amnsing. 

Criterion. Jolla ICarlowe In '"The Cavalier.*' 
See above. ^ 

Z>o/y '*.-*' The Billionaire.*' Masical comedy 
of the vulgar and commonplace type. 

JSmpii^.—atoct company In ♦*The Unfore- 
seen.* Notice later. 

Ganien.-lJUit weet of Mr. Sothem's excellent 
production of " Hamlet*' 

Garrick.—Annie Rassell in " Mice and Men.** 
Notice later. 

IfercU: Square.— De Wolf Hopper In "Mr. 
Pickwick. •» Notice later. 

Knickerbocker.— '" Mr. Blnebeard.** Notice 
later. 

Manhattan.— Mrs. Flske In '^Mary of Mag- 
dala.*' Interesting. 

New York—** When Johnny Comes Marching 
Home.'* Musical and patriotic. 

Princess,— ijoida Mann in "The Consul.*' 
Notice Uiter. 

Savoy.-*' The Girl with the Green Eyes.** 
Frothy but amusing Cljde Fitch play, with 
Mrs. Bloodgood as the star. 

VictoHa.—** The Eternal City,'* which has 
been called '' The Eternal Bore," but is, In (act, 
rather interesting. 

WaUack's.—** The Sultan of Sulu." George 
Ade's clever musical comedy. Clean and funnj. 
Weber and Jfieids^s.—BxiTleaqae and vaude- 
ville. Good seats may be purchased from pirates 
and highwajmen disguised as ticket specu- 
lators. 



LIFE 




75 

rpHE wflrsl newipai^er published iti the Utirtcd Stat#» is iili4i|il)M^' Ibe 
^ Kaahville iMU^f K^ws, My rt-aisou fnr such i*iateiiicitt is qul«kl^' tfili^ 

Very recently the editor of th& Dmfif Nt>w* wvk9 accoftUNi gn the itrect hf a 
uew«bOij, who did riat recognize him, thuv ; 

Box: Mister, I'm stiiek. TIpiu^, sir, hny a papr 
Epitor : I don*t wjiut » pafitr. Why don't you yell out wbnt*» 
Suit? That 11 Bell it. 

Therft's nolbin' in it. BWy B, 

Kuji»ici» F(JUtt* 
The wor*t PR per in th(* United Sutes h thrw hi irumlwr. 7V«p 
iTj'jimifier, which overruns Saii Praiifitfo ; Th€ Chicuijo 
Aiaerkati, ufflicUng a village in lilinoiJ'j und T?i€ A>?r 
IWfc Jr7u rfiqi and AmrriViin, which infesls the Kmpir^St^te 
in particular, And every pluie<* eUv In genera L 

Alltlirt'e ar« the projj^eny of a iiotwrtoaa philftnthropiist 

Jifimes! William Uaiuiolph Hearst, recently elected Congresij- 

mnii Irora Nevr York in recognition tif his serviceii to the 

'' Ueih*' Vfho a»as4ii3mUfd M«- 

KinlfV, 

l'h«ae j»aper3* may ht- elm»!*i- 
ilcd vvitl) Atid companfij to some 
n s J I II g-ti II n t d i.teaae», viz . : S rtiu i l- 
pos . As J aric ch ol er ft in M I h u hivn i c pill gue , 1 1 i? h ft r d 
to chnow« thi* worBt» but on general principles the 
JoutjujI gets the pal in ft 9 the niott Jkr-re^iching und 
influent ijiL Jn«t na the plague, bftd enough y^lmi 
n*Mricted to Ihc pi ti a hie crew of some tramp ahijj, 
could he ft niillioii times mom dire if transpJftnted to 
the middle oj' tliniiex Street. 

The JfmrfHtJ^ tike Iih brothers, h^ds on the»]iiii«of 
senBaiion and ihe s*tum of scandal, ^nd wajiev tki 
on I he diet. 
It Btand.^ for nothing and nothing filAnd& for ii 
It is u respecter of no one or anylxidy, and nohcMly 
who is somebody renpeets the Joicmo/. 

It profesaea to r€ present the *' Commou People "" by 
mi«rcpri.'senUng the uncommon |Yeople. and system at- 
ie«lly reviles niid critieises Ihe Government with out 
ever itngge»tiiig any practical remedy. 

It BtaudB for teni pern nee on the one hand, and 
with the other rakes in the dollars from its^ ]i(|Uor 
advert isetn en 1^. Chie tl&y a tnorbid cartoon hy 



WSAT A «HOT TBAT WA* ! 



I 



Worst Newspaper. 

TTTHIOH iH the worst daily news- 
paper in the United Statt*B, 
and why ? 

Life would like to h^ye tMs ques- 
tioti definitelj settled. With that in 
view we offer 

A Prize of Fifty Dollars in Gold 
for the cleverest contribtttion show- 
ing wh J any particnlar daily news- 
paper is the worst in the United 
States. 



OoyDmoNg. 

i'omp«Utora tnuat iLmli rbelr argu meats to 
ttiree tmiirlred wcmlj^i eM>ct). 

W rile on one stitc of tlie paper enlj 

Tlie contest wilt cly«e Mnrcti 1. lUua, *nd the 
award wilil t>e made am ftiK^n HiereAfter asibe 
respectlvo UjertlH of tlio arguinonts can l>e 
determined. 

Tlie witinliij^ anrument will ii^ printer}, 
lOjreTher with §uch omerw nn nia]f warn to Like 
w orth; or t ti n t iJ t hT 1 1) (Til 19 b eil bo uor. 

Names awd ad(treH?iea o! tlic wrtterti slieuM 
accorjipttoy ail mMimflcripis. In no ca^^ if Hi 
thf*^. Ifl* ftrhitf.d \tiihout ff6fT/ii**-ioft of t^it 
teniict\ Tlii>^4i whii lii'iiiitti limiT ujiinofMinpTii 
retarned stiouid eDclose a stamped and ad> 
dressed return envelope. 

Each manuscript may bear a paeudonym, 
which will be printed with the argument. 

The Editors of Lifb are to be the sole judges 
of the merits of the arguments. 




" ir TOU FOLKS can't LEARN MANNERS BNOUOB 
TO KEEP TOUR TAILS UNDER THE CHAIRS, TOU MAT 
GET SOME ONE ELSE TO WAIT ON TOU, AND THAT'S 
ALL THERE IS ABOUT IT.** 



76 

Dismal Davenport depicts the drunkard's 
disgrace, and the next day the same page is 
illumined by a champagne ad. 

In times of peace the Jotamal howls for 
war, and when the country wars, it is the 
first to bellow for peace. 

If the clear sky of prosperity is darkened 
by a cloud of disaster, the Journal says, " I 
seen it first.*' If some great good is accom- 
plished, the Jovemal says, " I done it." 

An inventory of the Sunday Journal is as 
follows : 

Sixty-four pages of truculent raff; 
Thirty-six more of sensational stuff ; 
Six colored sections for innocent youth ; 
Five social scandals, and one column of 
truth. Oliver, 

Science. 
" "gJUREKA I " cried the alchemist, 

-^^ trembling with joy. 

Of course the old ass had found noth- 
ing. Of coarse he was chasing a 
rainbow. 

But with the biologist who seeks a 
way to mannf actare the protoplasmic 
cell, it is very different. That is, it 
seems very different to us. 

Will it seem very different to people 
a thousand years hence ? 



TpOREIGNER: Captain, when will 
we be in sight of New York ? 
Captain {of ocean steaimr) : Well, if 
the smoke lifts, we ought to see it 
pretty soon after we have tied up at 
the wharf. 



LIFE 



A Result. 





' O-^^^ ^ * three-hour working 
^^ day and the right to fix our 
own wages ! " demanded the Working- 
men. 

*'But then, how shall we maintain 
our fifty per cent, dividends on all this 
watered stock ? *' pleaded the Trusts. 

While they disputed, the price of 
commodities became bo lofty that the 
Ordinary Citizen, who could not be 
classed as either laborer or millionaire, 
could no longer afford to live and at 
last went to purchase a pistol. But the 
Firearms Trust had so long been tied 
up with a strike that weapons were 
within the reach of only the longest 
purses. 




HERE 'SMI REOAR'8 (HIC), PBLLERS. ALLUS (hIC) LIKE T' DRINK WITH GENTLEMEN MYSE'p ! ' 



'* Alas I *' cried the Ordinary Citizen, 
** to me, already having been deprived 
of the necessities of life, those of death 
are now denied.'* 

Later, however, not to be foiled in 
his object, the vulgaCr fellow drowned 
himself in the river. 

The Future of Cattle-Brick. 

(Manafactarers of Arbor. Vitae Bolt-Nuts and 

Pebbola. Wltb apologies to Mr. 

Rud-yard Kipling.) 

TXT HEN earth's last cookie is cooklMl, 
and the eggs are broken and fried ; 

When the freshest jelly has moulded, and 
the oldest rooster has died ; 

We shall starve, and, faith, we shall feel it- 
just fast for an seon or two, 

Till the doctor of all sanitariums shall give 
us a brick>bat stew. 

And those that are hungry shall suffer, they 

shall sit in a chair of wood ; 
They shall eat with a pewter ladle of new 

predigested food. 
They shall find real gravel to chew on, done 

up in a nice pa()er box ; 
They shall eat for an age at a sitting, just 

forever a-chewing those rocks. 

And only the doctor shall feed us, and only 

the doctor shall say, 
That no one shall eat an apple, and no one 

abstain from hay. 
But each must devour a health- food ; each 

must stuff till he fall, 
Must chew on a stale malted biscuit and 

never slake hunger at all. 

Carl Lewis Bernhardt, 

Pensions. 
n ^HE case of the Kansas veteran who 
was converted to Christian 
Science, and thereupon relinquished 
the pension granted him by reason of 
rheumatism and stomach trouble, pre- 
sents difficulties. 

What becomes of the man*s republi- 
canism ? 

Seriously, does not this sort of thing 
jeopard the basic purpose of the pen- 
sion system ? 

We cannot afford to trifle with the 
interests of Christianity and human- 
ity, to say nothing of our destiny and 
the national honor. Merely to suggest 
a way out, the pensioner who is con- 
verted to Christian Science, and thus 
finds himself doubting the reality of 
the physical ills by reason of which he 
is pensioned, might still accept the 
bounty of a grateful nation on tlie 
ground of mental weakness. 



LIFE 



77 




•* IP TOUR DAUGHTER TRUSTS MB, SIR, WHY CAN'T TOUf *' 

" SHE DOBSN't CARB HOW MUCH A THING COSTS, AND I DO.' 



LIFE 



\%Xi^')')°V)Mm^ 




AN OMAR FOR LADIES. 
One for her Club and her own Latchkey fights. 
Another wastes in Study her good Nights. 
Ah, take the Clothes and let the Culture go. 

Nor heed the grumble of the Women's Rights ! 
Look at the Shopgirl all about us — "Lo, 
The Wages of a month," she says, "I blow 

In tor a Hat, and when my hair is waved. 
Doubtless my Friend will take me to the Show." 
And she who saved her coin for Flannels red. 
And she who caught Pneumonia Instead, 

Will both be Underground in Fifty Tears. 
And Prudence pays no Premium to the dead. 
Th' exclusive Style you set your heart upon 
Gets to the Bargain counters — and anon 

Like monograms on a Saleslady's tie 
Cheers but a moment — soon for you 'tis gone. 
Think, in the sad Four Hundred's gilded halls. 
Whose endless Leisure ev'n themselves appalls. 

How Ping-pong raged so high — then faded out 
To those far Suburbs that still chase its Balls. 
They say Sixth Avenue and the Bowery keep 
The dernier, cri that once was far from cheap ; 

Oreen Veils, one season chic — Department stores 
Mark down in vain — no profit shall they reap. 
— Josephine Dodge Daskam. in ^arper*8 Magazine. 



"This," observed Wu. as he lifted a box-like 
affair from his trunk, "is one of the greatest won- 
ders o^ America." 

"It doesn't look very wonderful," commented 
Tsi Ann, tucking one foot up where she could sit 
on it and the throne at the same time. 

"No. but even in America no one can understand 
it. Listen." 

"Don't put that thing to my ear," cautioned 
Tsi Ann. "Is this another of those telephones?" 

"O, no. This is worse than the telephone. It 
is a gas meter." 

"A gas meter? What does it do?" 

"The consumer." 

"How does it work?" 

"That is a mystery. It is only known that it 
works always and untiringly. It works while you 
sleep and while you wake. It never stops. It is 
constructed after the Newtonian theory of creation. 
It has something in it that Just keeps it whirling 
on and on, at so much per revolution, and nobody 
knows what keeps it moving, and nobody can stop 
It." 

"That's funny." 

"Funny, yes. But very sad in America. Listen 
to It. Hear it running right along. Thank Con- 
fucius and the 900 gods of the Pale Oreen Moun- 



tains ! The gas company never will get the cb&not 
to read what this meter has recorded." 

"But." said the Bmpress, "la there no eacapi 
from this in America?" 

"None." 

"It must be worse than manifest destiny." 

"It Is." 

"Wu." remarked Tsi Ann, with that intelllgezit 
smile which has enshrined her in the hearts oi 
curio collectors. "Wu, I am glad you were sent to. 
America. At one time I almost had decided to be* 
come civiliaed." 

"So had I," acknowledged Wu, "but the bite of 
the dog. as the foreign devils put it, will cure the 
hair." — Chicago Tribune, 

^'Nbxt month." wrote the editor of one of the 
most progressive of the many magazines having each 
the greatest number of intelligent readers. In bi« 
prospectus, "we shall begin the publication of a 
series of 1,000— count them — 1,000 articles on the 
Second Epistle of St. Peter, by the colonel of the 
Seventy-ninth Regiment of Oklahoma Volunteers!" 
Then he remarked to his entourage that he guessed 
certain rival publications would wish they bad 
never been bom, so hot had the pace become. — 
Detroit Journal. 



LiPK Is for sale by all Newsdealers In Great Britain. The International News 
Company, Bream^s Baildlng, Cbancery Lane, London. E. 0., England. AaENTS. 



Established 1823. 

WILSON 
WHISKEY. 

That's All I 



THE WILSON DISTILLING CO., 
Baltimore, Md. 



Washable Dress Goods. 

White Macclesfield, Gabrlelle Saltings, 

Embroidered Grass Linen, 

Embroidered Batchers* Linen, 

French Piqn6, Embroidered and Plain, 

White Silk Organdie. Silk Ginfrbams, Tokio Silks, 

Mercerized Canvas and Cheviot, 

D. & J. Anderson's 
Ginghams and Cheviots. 

NFW YOIK 



In Best Places 

Hunter 
Whiskey 

Stands Foremost. 

Wm. Lakahak a Son. Baltimore, Md. 





The 



At jrour 
til«b or dealer** 



Egyptian 

Cigarette 

c/*Quotlity 

AROMATIC DELICACY- 
MILDNESS — PURITY 



CHESTER CREST. 

Nortb roartli Ave.. Momt VerMa, N. V. 

A qaiet retort with every comfort, for 
men Dervoatly disordered through dimips- 
tion. CommanicationB strictly confidential. 
Address O. S. Avery, Manager. Telephone 
A. Mount Vernon. 



DDnUfM'Q BRONCHIAL 
DnUff 11 TROCHES 

Fifty years of succesii prove these I 
troches the simplest and best remedy I 
for Coughs, Hoarseness, Bronchial | 
and Lung Troubles. 

In boeoe*— never sold in bulk. 



BLACK, STARR AND FROST, 

438 FIFTH AVE., NEW YORK. 

PRECIOUS STONES. 



MOLETTESdoCZAR 



THE EVER FASHIONABLE PERFUME OF 
ORIZA-L.LEGRANDCOrandPrizFarislOOO) 



LIFE- 



II n il M il n il M il n il <l I 1 



A Delicious Digestive 




CHARTREUS^ 




Chartreuse 

— QRSSN OR YELLOW — 



THE HIGHEST GRADE CORDIAL. 
A GLASS AFTER DINNER IS A 
WONDERFUL AID TO DIGESTION 



At flwt cl— Wine MwchMita, Qroeeii, Hotria, CtdU. 

Batjcr & Co.,4S Broadway, New York, N.Y., 

Sole Ageau for United Sutes. 



>••«•« 



••mm 



Tondo nderrij 



IjITHIA 



h the clyb-mftn*g jor. lie knows 
tl<klhin|F lA better as a morning 
bfvcmge, Later in the day he 
appredfltes the way it blends uiih 
wine* and liqtiors and when used 
by Itself adds zest to aryy meaL 




-^"^^ MIDWINTER 

HORSE AUCTION 

MADISON SQ- GARDEN 
JANUARY 27-31 

FIVE DAYS AND EVENINGS 

Commencine each day positively at 11 o'clock 

A. M. sharp ; evenings a t 7.30 P. M. 

GREAT ARRAY OT EQUINE aLEBRIHES 

including a number of the 

FASTEST TROTTERS AND PACERS 
that were campaigned last year. 
Wiaacrt for I90t !• Fast aad Slow Cli 



RURITANIA and DAINTY DAFFO 

Champion Pair at last National Horse Show, 
and other Blue Ribbon Winners of national 
reputation from Winoga Stock Farm, Chestnut 
Hill, Pa. 

Horsss of Highest Class for Track, Speedway 
and Road, Futurity Prospects, Gentlemen's 
Driving Teams. Catalogue gives full par- 
ticulars. 

Madlton 8q. 6ird«ii 
Nfw York City 



FASIG-TIPTON CO., 




The club 

are the orlfi^nal bottled Cocktails. 
Years of experience have made 
them THB PERFECT COCKTAILS 
that thev are. Do not be lured 
Into buying some imitation. The 
ORIGINAL of anything: Is good 
enough. When others are offered 
it is for the purpose of larger prof- 
its. Insist upon liaving the CLUB 
COCKTAILS, and Uke no other. 

G. F. HEURLKTN & BRC, SoU FroprUtort 

29 Broadway, New York, N. Y. 

Hartford, Conn. Ix>ndon 



LEADAMS SHOE TREES 



<is-! 



'^fCeep A Shoe ff«e in your 
I blwe when the fool is <kiI.'^ 

Jtrivi--. ttii- riir! fmni tfic U'm'. 
U*-(iir4'H (iriiTltjiii ljt":^iiit:K[*. 

M*¥\'a and Wtjmen's 8tgtt9. St. 
fat UQur 8f}Qa Dm^hr of 4ir»ct 
\ from 

LIOMEL N. LEADAM 

131> P\LMKTTf* STHj:|!T,nilOiliiLTN 



WITHOUT TREES. " The Leterage J)oe$ /«.•» 



WITH TREES. 



Moki Snake Dance 




If you are 
Growing Old 

Go to California this winter and 
add ten years to your life. 
Wine-like air and balmy sun- 
shine. 

Every comfort on the restful 
California Limited. 
Chicago to California in less 
than three days. 
Why shiver at home ? 

The California tour described in our 
books ; mailed for loc in stamps. Address 
General Passenger Office, Atchisoo.Topcka 
& Santa Fe Railway, Chicago. 

Santa Fe 




Pure 

Habana 

Segars— 

Always 

Mild 

And 

Aromatic 



Me^de in the old-foLshioned honest 
way of Pure HaboLnoL Tobacco 
delightfully blended 



Look for the Bull 
Dog on eoLch Box 



J^Kn W. MerrisLin & Co. 

The R^oycroft Sege^r Shop, which 
is "At the Sign of the Bull Dog** 
NEW YORK 



y 



LIFE 



r^^'^Ooa fboLfSM 



([gNTEMPoRAi 




Shb met bim In the darkened hall ; 

Said he, "I've brought Rome roses." 
Her answer seemed irrelevant ; 

It was, "How cold your nose Is !" 

— ^Varsity Fortnightly. 

For convenience, really superior hotel service 
for select patronage, and climate, there is nothing 
for New Yorkers quite like Lakewood, New Jersey. 
Laurel House. 
Laurel-in-the-Pines. 

"It's a fact. Aunt Kate." said the young man. 
"Father says he will pay my way through college, 
but after that I'll have to stand on my own merits." 

"Let us hope it will not be so bad as that, Rod- 
ney," soothingly replied his elderly relative. — Chi- 
cago Tribune. 

Get strength of bone and moscle, purify the system 
with Abbott's, the Original Angostura Bitters. Druggists. 

"This is the best stove in the market. It will 
save half your coal." 

"Is that so? Then give me two of them, so's I 
can save it a\\."— Chicago Daily News. 

Off to Old Point Comfort, Va. ! The scenery is 
sublime. Historic. Wouldn't miss it ! A postal to 
the Chamberlin brings a booklet. 

"Now, phwat wud ye do In a case loike thot?" 

"Loike phwat?" 

"Th* walkin' diligate tills me to sthroike. an' me 
ould woman orders me to ka-ape on wur-rkln'." — 
Woman'8 Home Companion. 

CALIFORNIA IN LESS THAN THREE DAYS 

VIA Chicago and North-Westem, Union Pacific, and 
Southern Pacific Railways from Chicago. The elec- 
tric-lighted "bverland Limited" provides the best 
of evenrthing. Diversity of routes ; finest scenery. 
Compartment observation cars, buffet-library cars 
(with barber and bath) ; dining cars. All agents 
sell tickets via this route. 

When somebody once misinterpreted Thomas B. 
Reed's refusal to take a glass of whisky as an en- 
deavor to reform a bad habit, he remarked : "I hope 
you don't think that I ever needed two sidewalks on 
my way home." — Argonaut. 

Bt the sad sea waves, drink a bottle of delicious 
Champagne. Cook'g Imperial Extra Dry. It Is the 
very best. 

A Nebraska cowboy eloped with his employer's 
daughter ; the angry father shot him in the hip ; a 
preacher married the pair while the doctor probed 
for the bullet, and then the preacher went out with 
a gun and chased the father away. — Buffalo Com' 
mercial. 

The one hundred and sixty-sixth anniversary of 
the birthday of Thomas Paine, Thursday evening, 
January 29th, will be celebrated in New York by a 
dinner at the Hotel Marlborough, at which all ad- 
mirers of the "author-hero of the revolution" will 
be welcome. Addresses are promised from Messrs. 
Moncure D. Conway, Hugh O. Pentecost, Henry 
Frank, and Rev. Minot D. Savage. Seats must be 
engaged several days in advance, and may be ob- 
tained from Mr. Edwin C. Walker, 244 West 143d 
Street, New York, at one dollar and twenty-flve cents each. 

"Mrs. Bjones expected her husband to give her 
a new wrap on Christmas, but she was disap- 
pointed." 

"I always knew he didn't care a wrap for her." — 
Philadelphia Record. 




The only PURE and CORRECT ARTIFICIAL 
MINERAL WATERS sold In America to-day 

CARBONIC, ARTIFICIAL VICHY. 
SELTERS, CLUB SODA, Etc., 

are also put up In bottles for out of town 
delivery, and oan be sent by freight or 
express to any part of the United States. 
Orders to 

CARL H. SCHULTZ 

Tel. 142 Madison Sq. 48(M44 First Ave., N. T. 



Sore Throat 

If oarsenesStQuinsy .Tonsillitis 

Laryngitis and other throat 

troubles quickly relieved 

and promptly cured 

by the use of 

nyarozone 

This scientific germicide is used 
and endorsed by leading physi- 
cians everywhere. It is <ihs€h~ 
tut el y harmless^ yet a most 
powerful healing agent. 

By killing the germs that cause 
these diseases, without injury to 
the tissue, Hvdrozone cures the 
patient. Sola by Leading Dnig- 
gists. If not at yours, will send 
bottle, prepaid, on receipt of 25 



cents 



Qj.^ ^tote 



^hJlcCLh^MASa^ 



Dept. Dm 60 Prince St. 9 New York 



" Afimiiiiii Old Briidf nde fmWiii." 

-Medical Press iLondon), Aug. IS99. 

MARTELL'S 
THREE STAR 
BRANDY 

AT ALL BARS AND RESTAURANTS. 




DEUTZ a GELOERIUIlirS 

"Gold Lack" 

CHAMPAGNE 

** sec" and **brut" 



One of the lead: 
ingChampagngj 
of Europe, 



possessing to the 
fullest extent the 
fruity and delicate 
character peculiar to 
the wines of tlic fa- 
mous Ay district of 
France. 

C H. ARNOLD *C0. 

AGENTS f 01 U. & 

27 Soiitii WiUia* St 

NEW YORK 



©LO eR©W RYE 



A 
STRAIQHT 



M kWWMMC^m^^W^^J H. B. KIRK & CO., 

Y^ |-1 1 IV O Y SOLE BOTTLERS. NEW YORK 



LIFE 



i'TTHE qoesrion has been asked why ForeiRn Ale has not 
A the same good taste here that it has in England. It 
is answered by the iact that the climate is different ; be- 
sides there are the disturbances and the exposure of 
ocean tran^wrtatioo. 

EvOl1\S* 

ALB 

Is Bottled at the Brewery 

hy its muJurt^ who ktum frtcisefy when and 
ka>nt t0 handle it. and who preeiffusiy guard the 
goodness 0/ It* brewimg against danger from 
auiside battling, t 

EVAFIfl* ALB \m soM at amnetal 
lo^rer price than foreign ale b«*l 
eause Is Is bottlad at tbe brewery* I 

Apply to may dealer anywhere. 

£stobliBbedl786 , 
I, Hudson, M. TJ 



O. H. SYANH & 8QNH, 

Brewery and BotUlnc Worki 




The Lion's Mouth 

a novel monthly prize competition, is described in a beautiful 
httle book, illustrated by Uibson, Rrnungton, Smedley, Pen- 
field. Hutt, and other well-known artists. Send four cent» a* 
uoce for the book and list of over three thousand dollars in 
prues, to 

The Uon's Mouth. 418 West 13th St.. New York 
WASHINGTON. 

Tliree-daj Personallj-Oon^netad Toim 
▼la Penneylvanla Railroad* 

The next PUnMQrlra la Railroad P«nonallT<eondueted Tour 
WMbinct<m leaves Tbnraday^ January 19. Hate, oovertoff rail- 



Philadelphia. These rates cover aooommodations tortwodays St 
the Arlin ton, Normandle, Bigas. Bbbltt. Shoreham, L'ochrsn, 
Gordon, Barton, or Hamilton Hotels. For aoeommodations at 
Recent, MairopoHtan. National, or Gokmlal Hotels. $1M lees. 
SpMial side trip to Mu Vernon. 

All tlokeiB aood for ten days, with ipedal hotel rates after 
•Tpinuion of hotel ooupons. 

yor Itfnerarlee and full information applr to tloket scents; 
Tooriat Acent, 988 FIftb Avenue Mew York : 4 tk>nrt Street, 
Brooklyn ; 7«9 Broad Street, Newark, N. J. ; or address Geo. W. 
Boyd. AssistABt General Passencar A^ent, Broad Street Sis- 
tion, Philadelphia. 



WP^ All 70a have sraessed about life 

CL insurance may be wrong. If yon 

P^Y ^^'^^ ^ know the truth, send for 

U^N^^^ "How and Why," lasued by the 

■ V'JiPtJ " PlNN M UTUAL Lmt. 

/^ C E ■ •^•^ Cheatnm Street. Philadelphia. 




Rae's Lucca 

Olive Oil 

appreciated by connoisseurs 
for its 

Delicate Flavor 



(No rank smell nor taste, so frequent in 
some brands of Olive Oil.) 

Onaranteed Pure Oil of Olives 
• . • only . . . 

S. RAE & CO. 

{Established 1836) 

LEGHORN. ITALY 




OSORGI. WlSB-NOTOK CR08BINO TBI DRLAWABB. 



NatioDal Elsotrio Vehioles 

Handflome, moefal, thoronghly depend- 
able. Bnilt for reliable everyday service 
and give it Simplest in oonstmction, safely 
and easily operated— the perfected auto- 
mobiles for business or pleasure. 

▼rlt« for <rar lUttatrsted estsl«iffa« ■taowins 
Bsay new and Improvsd sleouio Miloinobltet. 

unoiu ynioLi co., we um st ,iBiiuap«iiajDa. 




Rare Old Violins 

)LanceMt and finest oolleotion on this continent, 
comprising the complete oelebrated Hawley 
ooilection. Fine oatalogne (free) containing 
60 fa<>«imilelabels in colors and Biographies of 
all the noted malcers. List and partionlars of 
Solo instmments from ffiO to 110.000. Monthly 
payments may be arranged. Violins sent on 
seren days examination. Formal certificate 
of Oenainenesa with each instrument. 

LYON & HEALY, "USS^ 



kitrto-" 



Ifyoawsntto 

^_ know how to do your 

^ "^verticinc at less cost, if you 

"^ish to become an ad-writer or 

msnsser at $io to ^100, if yon with to gain 

"knowledee that will positively increase yoar salary or 

I income, if yon wish yonr son or yonr daughter to 

learn a dignified and qaickly>proatable profession, 

I send three i-cent stamps for prospectus and read In it 

the terms on which I give a filtlvt gmaranttt •/ 

1 incrt»t«d tarnlngt. 

LCHAILES AUSTIN BATES 130 Nsissa St., New Yerk. 



STANDS FOR THE ACME OF 
EXCEULENCE 



. 1 

Veuve Qicquot 
Champc^e 




NABISCO 

Su{(ar 
Wafers 

A Fairy Sandwich with an 
upper and lower crust of 
indescribable delicacy, 
separated with a creamy 
flavoring of 

Lemon, Oranget 
Chocolate^ Vanilla, 

Strawberry, 
Raspberry, or Mint. 

Aak. for your fkvorite flavor. 
NATIONAL BISCUIT COMPAKV 



( 



1500 



in CASH 
PRIZES 



Or the equivateni in GOERZ manufadures 
if preferred 

G. P.Goers Optleml HForku hereby wlslito la- 
form the intending compeUtors for the Inter na- 
tional Prize Competlttonythat at the request 
of a number of competitors In the Ensrllsh and French 
Colonies, the date of closing this contest has been 
postponed antllthe 30lh of Jane, 1903. 
Competitors who, with a view to this alteration, wish 
to withdraw their exhibit or exchange the same, are 
hereby notified that their exhibits will be kept at the 
New York Office antll the date of shipment to Berlin. 

FOR PARTICULARS ADDRESS 

G. P. GOERZ OPTICAL WORKS 

Room 58 

32 East Union Square* New York 

Main Office, BERLIN — PRIBDBNAU, GERMANY 
Branches, LONDON— 3-6 Holborn Circus 
PARIS — as Rue de L'Bntrepot 



20th CENTURY LIMITED '^;^'^^:l;£'' NEW YORK CENTRAL and LAKE SHOJ 



LIFE 



/ainiar7tE,naL 



FiftjT'Ei^hfh ^nnuat ^fafement of the 

NEW -YORK LIFE INSURJ^NCE CO. 

JOHN A. McCALL. President. 
346 & 348 BROADWAY, T>l^\Af YORK CITY. 



JANUARY 1. 1903. 



ASSETS. 

{Company does not invest in or loan upon stocks of any kind.) 
United States. State, City, Couaty and other Bonds (cost 

value, $318,42»,U51). market value, December »1, 1903 $225,039,205 

Bonds and Mortgages (505 first liens) 26. 125,818 

Deposits in Trust Companies and Banks, at interest 22,622,05(5 

Loans to Policy-holders on their Policies as security Gegal 

val. thereof, $85,000.000) 

Real Estate (26 pieces, including 12 office buildings, 

valued at $10,090,000) 

Loans on Bonds (market value, $5,949,420) 

Quarterly and Semi-Annual Premiums not yet due, re- 

serve charged in Liabilities 

Premium Notes on Policies in force (Legal Reserve to 

secure same, $4.800.000) 

Premiums in transit, reserve charged in Liabilities 

Interest and Rents accrued 



22,098.674 

12 8S0,000 
4,104,000 

8,147.027 



INCOME, 1902. 



2,664,476 
2.294 277 
1,870,775 

Total Assets (perCertificate of NewTork Ins. Dept.) , $822,840,000 
LIABILITIES. "~"~"^ 

Policy Reserve per Certificate of New York Insurance 

Department (see below), December 81, 1902 $268,844,420 

All other Liabilities : Policy Claims, Annuities, Endow- 
ments, etc., awaiting presentment for payment.. .... 

Additional Reserve on Policies wbieh 
the Company values on a 8 per cent, 
or a 8^ per cent, basis, over tlie 4 
per cent, valuation by the Insurance 

Department 

Reserve to provide dividends payable to 
policy-holders during 1908, and in sub- 



4,462,861 



$5,897,825 



sequent years, per policy contracts — 
To holders of 20 " --..--" 



Year Period Policies 

and longer 23.877,826 

To holders of 15- Year Period Policies 8,270.742 

To holders of 10-Year Period Policies 588.668 

To holders of 5- Year Period Policies 587,401 

To holders of Annual Dividend Policies 800,947 

Reserves to provide for all other contingenci es 10.511,715 

Total 



50,084.119 



Total Liabilities (per Certificate of New York In- 
surance Dept.) $822.840.900 



New Premiums (Annuities. $1,712,429) $15,688,022 

Renewal Premiums 49,461,921 

Interest, etc. (Trust Fund, $468.881) 14,058,456 

Totallnoome .$79,108,401 

DLSBURSEMENTSt 1902. 

Death-Claims paid $15,982,507 

Endowments paid 4.045,102 

Annuities, Dividends, Surrender Values, 

etc 10.618,229 

Total paid policy-holders. . . $80,595,888 

Conunissions, Brokerages, and all other pay- 
ments to Agents 8,869,787 

Home Office and Branch OfBce Salaries and 

Physicians^ Pees 4,829,896 

Ttoes, Advertising and all other expenses. . 8,180,070 

ToUl Disbursements 946.926,^1 



INSURANCE ACCOUNT, 

Number. 

Paid-for Insurances In Force, December 

81,1901 599,818 $1,865,889,299 

New Paid.for Insurances, 1902 155.440 802,798,229 

Old Insurances Revived, etc 1,444 2,897,(1 



Totals 756,702 $1,671,064,528 

ToUl Terminated In 1902 52,185 117.486.502 



Paid-for Insurances In Foree, Decem- 
ber 81, 1902 704,567 $1,558,688,026 



Gain in 1902 104,749 $188,258,727 



CERTIFICATE OF SUPERINTENDENT OF STATE OF NEW YORK INSURANCE DEPARTMENT. 

AxBAKT, January 8, 1903. 

I, FRANCIS HENDRICKS. Superintendent of Insurance of the State of New York, do hereby certify that the NEW-YORK MFE 
INSURANCE COMPANY, of the Citv of New York, in the State of New York, a Mutual Life Insurance Company, having no capital stock, is duly 
authorized to transact the business of Life Insurance in this State. 

I FURTHER CERTIFY that, in accordance with the provisions of Section eighty-four of the insurance law of the State of New York, I have 
caused the Policy obligations of the said Company, outstanding and paid for on the 81st day of December. 1902. to be valued on the following bads : 
Policies known as the Company's three per cent. Policies, and all Policies issued since December 81. 1900. being valued as per the American Ex- 
perience Table of Mortality with three per cent, interest, and all other Policies being valued as per the Combined Experience Table of Mortality with 
four per cent, interest ; and I hereby certify the result to be as follows : 

Net Reserve Value of Policies $250,008,23400 

•* •* Additions 8,882,52900 

•* ** Annuities 15.248.811.00 

Total $268,589,074.00 

Less Net Reserve Value of Policies re-insured 944,654 00 

Total Net Reserve Values $268,844.420.00 

I FURTHER CERTIFY, from the sworn Report of the Company on file in this Department, that the Admitted ' 

Assets are... $828.840,900.08 

Reserve Values of Policies as calculated by this Department $868,844,420.00 

General Liabilities 4,468,861.17 

Additional Reserve on Policies which the Company values on a higher basis than that used by the 

Department, as above stated $5,897,825.00 

Reserve to provide dividends payable to policy holders in 1903 and in subsequent years 84,125.078.86 

Reserves to provide for all other contingencies 10.511,715.00 

Total Additional Reserves 50.034,118.86 

Total $822.840.900.08 

IN WITNESS WHEREOF, I have hereunto subscribed my name and caused my official seal to be afflzedat the City of Albany, the day and 
ar first above written. FRANCIS HENDRICKS. Superintendent of Ine\ire.nce. 



VOLUME XLl. 



NEW TURK, JANUARY 29, 1903. 

Entered at the New York Post Office as Second-Class Mail Matter. 

Copjrtgtl!, 1002, by LIFK Pr'BUaH[KG GoMPAlfT. 




"CAN'T YOU HURBY A BIT, CLABA? WE MUST CATCH THE 8AWYEBS AND CONGRATULATE THEM ON THEIB 
MABBIAQE." 

"there's no use hurrying for THAT — IT's TOO LATE TO CONGRATULATE THEM, ANYHOW; THEY'VE BEEN 
MARRIED A MONTH." 



/ 



O^VRIOHT PON OliEAT BIIITAiN BV JAMES HENDCIISeN 
UNOER THE ACT OP 1891. 



LIFt; 



VAN NOR DEN 
TRUST COMPANY 

751 FIFTH AVENUE,NEAR 58"^" STREET 

NEW YORK 

Capital and Surplus, $2,000,000 



No. 19 

Household and personal accounts are received, upon 
which checks may be drawn, as in any bank* Interest is 
allowed on daily balances. 

Every kmd of inconne will be collected for the deposi- 
tor and credited to his bank account or remitted. Bonds^ 
real estate mortgages, stock certificates, and coupons may 
be deposited for safe-keeping, collection at maturity, or 
delivery in case of sale. 

The Trust Company thus offers advantages not fur- 
nished by a bank. 



OFFICERS 
Warper M. Van Nordtn, Prfiidrnt Morton C Nicholi, rice- Pre j. and Ste*y 

WQtiam F, Hav«iin*yer, f'it:^-Prttti/^mt Arthur King Wuod, Trtaturtr 

Ed*ard S, A very t Tmit Ojfiirr 



Warner Van Narden 
Warner M. Van Norden 
William F. Havenieyer 
Joim H. Flagler 
lames Takou 
rluUi CurneLius N. BList 
John Claf1.in 



DIRECTORS 
DtiQiont Claret* 
Hetjrjf F. Shnjemaker 
Benjamin P^rkin^ 
Richard [.. Edwards 
John K. Wail-ihum 
Jonathan E. Curr^y 



T>]omaj P* Fowler 
Efnsl Thai maun 
Charles W. Moru 
MaiiLon D. Tlijticher 
Henry H, Cook 
Henry T. hronson 
Arthur A. Fuwier 



From the Woman's Viewpoint 

Life Insurance is more than an investment^more than simply 
sound business Judgment. It Is her gusranlee of support and 
comfort tn the future— the bulwark of protection which you 
are in duty bound to provide. 
( 

The Prudential 

would like to have the appiication. 



Write for patticvbn. 

Address D«p|. O, 

THE PRUDENTIAL 
INSURANCE 
:OMPANY 
3F AMERICA 

JOHN F. DRY DEN 
President 




iOME OFFICE: *^ 

Newark, N* J. 




1903 MODEL 



<^ 




The ^evidence 

"Am very glad to write stating that our c%T arrived 
in Cleveland after a very interesting trip. Stopped Sun- 
day in Cleveland, leaving by boat that night. Left 
Detroit 8.20 A, M. Monday — fair roads for 26 miles 
— then rongh sandy roads for 40 miles — ran into 
heavy rain storm, clay, hills — had to put ropes on 
wheels. Got through all right. Arrived Saginaw 7 P. M, 
Left Saginaw 7. JO — extremely slippery roads. About 
1 1 miles on low gear in the rain. Balance 5 miles on 
stone roads and pavements, arriving home at 10 P, M., 
dead tired, but with the satisfaction that everything 
worked from beginning to end of trip with perfect 
satisfaction, and that, too, through the hardest trying 
out a machine could possibly have.'* 

The above letter and many others like it can be seen ai 

our offices 

Any of the four wheel* on the Packard Motor C*r can be 
raised or lowered fifteen inches from the plane of the other 
three wheels without the slightest strain in either the body or 
mechanism. This does not in the least impair the stability of 
the car nor affect its steering, but it changes the shocks notice- 
able in rough going on other machines to an easy rolling 
motion in this. 

Ask the MslFi Who 
Owns One 

Price. $2,500 

.-/.W) WRITE FOR CATALOG J. 

PACKARD MOTOR CAR CO. 
Warren, 0. 



LIbI of A^^eiicJeR i 

NfcW YOlJK— Eii?HTn Ik'|iE., BIT W. riliCAliO^ Pstdw A CompAiiyj4<)l MicM' 

fifiHi St. ^J!Hl IkJuk-^-anj. 

PIllLAI>KIJ'lirA-Wm. 11. l{mlul].li, ?j>J Uy^ A NGKLKK -Norman W. Cbnreh. 4^ 

liOSTilN'-ll. Ji. Siunnnk a S.>i], a-i'J SAX I-HANCISCO— H. B. Lanaltre, Ijtu 

<.V>1 I*i]f^ Avi-. Market St. 



/■ ••;■: 



r-:^v) coLLLui;^ 



:0\ 



LIFE 



V. 



'^^ 



85 



■^^■♦'•"'JnGr, M^5^' 




CIVILIZATION AND PROGRESS. 
AS PBBTBCTBD BT THB XSTBOPOLITAN 8TBBBT RAILWAY CO. 



Chant of a Grateful New Yorker. 

TT'IND FATE, attend to my stridenttale, 
-*-^ And note my lot in life, 
Of which I speak 
With pride in my cheek, 
Though it's one of deadly strife. 
Others there be who suffer with me — 
There's a million or more on tap — 
But I am the man Who's next to the man 
who's hanging on to a strap. 

On the surface cars, as I fight my way, 
Or on the third rail ride ; 

Though I'm black and blue, 
And breathless too, 
As my ribs sink into my side. 
Yet with joy I cry, 
As my way I pry, 
And my clothes in ribbons flap. 



For I am the man who's next to the man 
who's hanging on to a strap. 

O kind Manhattan I I owe thee much 1 
How may I quite repay 
This place reser\'ed 
As I'm jerked and swerved 
On my million volted way? 
And thy fostering care 
I bless, nor swear, 
As I fill this favored gap, 
For I am the man who's next to the man 
who's hanging on to a strap. 

Tom. Masson, 

* * "p A, what is a theatrical syndicate?' ' 
** My son, it's a concern that 
stands between the public and what 
the public really wants." 




A CHICKEN SANDWICH. 



i6 



LIFE 




'♦ »'-*//<f M^r<f is U/e there's Hope:' 

VOL. XLI. JAN. 29, 1908. No. 1067. 

19 Wmt Thirtt-Firot St., Nbw York. 



Pabllshed every Tboraday. •5.P0 a year In ad 
▼aooe. Postaffe to foreign count rlee In tbe Postal 
Union, I1.U4 a year extra. e>lnKle current copif>s, 
10 cents. Back narobem, after three months from 
date of publication. 3a cenu. 

No contribution will be returned unless 
accompanied by stamped and addressed 
envelope. 

The illustrations in Life are copyrighted, 
and are not to be reproduced. 

Prompt notification should be sent by sub- 
scribers of any change of address. 




^HE Springfield Republican 
complains that too many 
Americans, nowadays, live 
in rented houses. The 
mass of people, it says, are 
either unable or unwilling 
to own real estate. Fami- 
lies are small, as a rule, 
and live well up to their 
incomes, relying on a little 
life insurance for future 
protection. They move often, 
-and do not become permanently 
identified with any particular 
neighborhood, but go the pace 
according to their several abili- 
^ ties, developing new wants all 
the time, and imparting rest- 
lessness to life. The Hepublican 
thinks it is a poor state of things, and 
wishes that more of us would deny 
ourselves, and settle down, and eschew 
luxury and acquire land. Its moans 
are timely, and are particularly ap- 
plicable to that i>art of the population 
that lives in big cities. New York, for 
example, is full of homeless people who 
live in flats and have no immediate 
prospect of ever being anything but 
homeless. If they stay in New York 
it takes all they can get to live, and if 
they go away they lose their incomes. 
Things have been supposed to be better 
in smaller towns, but if the shoe 
pinches in Springfield it must be 
pretty tight everywhere. The upshot 
of the situation seems to be that aspir- 
ing American families nowadays need 
at least two incomes, one for the 
maintenance of a home somewhere, 
and the other to hire and run a place 
to live and work in. Our system of 



inheritance, by which family estates 
are divided equally among all the 
children, doubtless makes for restless- 
ness, for primogeniture has at least 
the merit of keeping up family homes. 
But we don't want primogeniture, and 
as for the more obvious remedy, no 
one can deny that, as a people, we 
strive earnestly to acquire incomes 
enough to provide for all our needs. 
Millions of us are yearning all the time 
to have homes, and are hustling dili- 
gently to get money enough to buy 
them. Some of us will succeed. More 
of us might perhaps succeed if the 
labor barons, and the coal barons, and 
the meat barons, and the railroad 
kings and the tari£f fixers did not so 
exalt the price of necessaries that it is 
more trouble to save money than it is 
to be homeless. The luxury of having 
a home and the necessity of making a 
living seem to conflict. If the Reptih- 
lican can devise any way of harmoniz- 
ing them it will earn an increased 
measure of the public regard. 




/^OAL is scarce and dear. It is not 
^^ quite clear whether the miners 
are making coal scarce so as to make 
the operators unpopular, or the opera- 
tors are holding it back so that we 
may the better appreciate the obstinacy 
of the miners. Mr. Mitchell has called 
upon his miners to work harder, but 
the independent operators are working 
each for himself and charging famine 
prices, and wholesale buyers are, appar- 
ently, holding back coal so that the 
famine may pinch. The whole coal 
situation is displeasing to contemplate, 
and too complicated to discourse about 
with safety. The one clear thing is 
that a good many persons, including 
most of the independent operators, are 
making a great deal of money out of 
the necessities of the public. The big 
c>oal companies insist that they have 
not raised their prices, but the consum- 
er certainly i)ays an extortionate price 
for the coal they mine, and some one 
gets the difference. Congress has re- 
moved the duty on coal for a year, 
which is more than was expected of it. 
That may help matters a little. Mean- 
while we follow the story of the strike 



as it is told to the CommisBion and 
wait for the Commissioners to point 
the moral. 




^ 



TT seems at this writing to be settled 
-^ that the Utah Republicans will 
send Apostle Smoot to the Senate. So 
far as appears, the only trouble about 
Smoot is that he represents Hor- 
monism. There are Senators who rep- 
resent various commodities like oapper 
or sugar, and others who represent 
pocket boroughs ; there are good Sena- 
tors and bad, but there is none at 
present who represents anything quite 
so objectionable as the Mormon church. 
We all know now that Utah should 
not have been admitted to Statehood, 
but since she is a State it is, possibly, 
not the worse thing that could happen 
for her to send to the Senate a true 
representative of the degrading hie- 
rarchy which governs her. It is better 
that we should remember the Mor- 
mons. Smoot will put the Senate in 
mind of them when he knocks at its 
door. 





^pHE law seems to have dealt inade- 
quately with David Fleming of 
Plattsburg. He is a golfer, and suffers 
from the infirmities natural to golfers. 
Stung one day to sudden irritation by 
the failure of a stroke, he hurled his 
golfing iron at a caddie. It struck the 
boy in the face and destroyed one of 
his eyes. The caddie's father sued for 
damages, and the court directed Flem- 
ing to pay six thousand dollars, or 
spend six months within jail limits. 
Fleming won't pay, and is living com- 
fortably at a hotel within the Uberal 
jail limits of Plattsburg. He is getting 
off too cheap. The law— Plattsburg 
law, at any rate — is too lenient to of- 
fenders against caddies. It is hereby 
suggested that the American Grolf As- 
sociation consider this Fleming case, 
and try to devise some penalties that 
will cover it, and like cases, in future. 
Unless caddies can be protected from 
cads, golf will languish. 



LIFE 



87 




from the O. H. D. T. B, I.» demanding thai; yon Babmit a reiK>rt 
hi th^ui* bpedfjing how much alcohol ia comsiimed in the White 
House tach week. 

PliEsiDENT: Say no. Hold on — tell them if they will 

pay th« Biliary of the clerk who draws up the statistic*. I 

don^t mind. {.Uitk.} Alter all. I'm only the si^rvant of 

the people. (/IMrf,) What doeii O. H. D, T. B. L 

stand for? 

SE(:i>ND Secretary : " Order of Hearthstone Defend- 
ers, Temjje ranee Bran<.'h, Inct>rporated/' 

PiiEsmBST ; Really? I ihought it might 
mean '* Old Heos Dying to Butt In." 
( f)tf^tr ai^n a. K/i h i ■ DOM ESTIC . J 
Domestic : Your Eietdleney, Mrs* Rot)j*evelt 
desires to know if it will ajccord with your con- 
venience to call upon the Bsmith-Bjones next 
Suiiday nf tarnooii ? 

President : Yes, certainly. Tell her we will 
start at three o'clock. 

Thikd Secretary : Just a moment, Mr. Presi* 
dt^nt. Here \^ iv notificarion from the South Caro- 
lina Ladies* Sunday Observance Or- 
ganization, stating that unlesH you are 
willing to conform to tbe rules laid 
down by tbeir S^iciety about staying at 



**|KIH'T WORRT AKOtTT H(3i, UKaB. AU, TMB WfJHU) IflVE.** K UOVKIt.' 
'* T18 ; BUT FAPA^II BO AWfCLLr C.H W-qRLDH." 

Government Emphatically by the People- 

^ lu'Hiil tif [heptcEE^rf^ 'Love Aud 
Life/' fmni !he Wttllw »»f Th« Wliiie 
House biM:lc to tbe forcomii Gallerr, 

Scene : Pritntr fffirf w' fh* 

PrEsIUENT '■'/ f/i* Vfiiied Stfltff(. 
I hit Ej?rtllttii\t/ jMtttit thi' fvmit 
trJith' hin Hrrrtittfifa ajitu hin 

FiHsT Secretary : Mr. PreHident, 

h+^rt* in a lettf^r from the W. (t. O- A* 

a.Hkini< that their representative* l*e 

apxiointed to >*uperintt:'nd tbe malEing of the 

bedwin the Executive Man>ion. 

PKE,sinK>T: CVrtainly nor. Tell them so. 
What does W. G. O. A. mejjiii by tbe way ' 

First Sechetary {r**H¥fiHitiij MUf): Er— *■ W^omcu*s 
General Overseeing Association.'* 
President : Ha I 
Second Secretary : And here is one, your Excellency, 





Li.: .MSi^' 



LIFERS FASHION PLATES. 
major-oenbral'b uniform, u. s. armt. 



88 



LIFE 



home on the Sabbath Day and 
reading Improving Works to 
your family, it cannot con- 
scientionsly support you dur- 
ing the next Presidential cam- 
paign. 

Presidbnt {turning pale) : 
Oh, that alters the case com- 
pletely. (Jb Domestic.) Tell 
Mrs. Roosevelt that it will be 
impossible to make the call on 
Sunday. (Exit Domestic.) 
Dear, dear I This is terrible. 
Talk about your narrow es- 
.capesl (Loud murmurs with- 
out,) What is that noise? 

Attendant (entering): There 
are sixteen deputations, your 
Excellency, waiting to see 
you. 

President : Sixteen depu- 
tations 1 What in heaven's 
name are they ? 

Attendant : All women — 
ladies, I mean, your Excel, 
lency. The P. T. A. M. J., the 
O. B. Q. L. R., theD. L. S., 
the X. Z. J. Q.W. K. A. A. A., 
the O. T. R. 

President : Here, that will 
do. Tell them they needn't 
wait. Tell them to. go to^^ 
no, say I am going out of town. 
Say I am going to resign 1 Tell 
them Hanna can have my job. 
Say — here, bring me something 
to dip my head in I 

(Wat)es hia arms frantically , 
as scene closes in,) 

David IL Dodge, 



LIFE'S SUGGESTIONS FOR ARTISTIC STREET SIGNS, 

FOR THS OUIDANCB OV YIBITINO STRAKelM. 





rpHEY say John isn't doing 
-■- well in medicine. I am 



afraid he never will learn 
enough to be an all around 
practitioner." 
•* Oh, well, never mind. He can be- 
come a specialist/ ' 





X^on Telepathy Explain? is a little volume by Minot J. 
^ Savage upon Spiritism (a new term to replace the word 
Spiritualism, now somewhat shopworn). It is succinct, 
straightforward and hence interesting. If the cited obser- 
vations contain no error, the deductions are inevitable and 
the results momentous. But, in Mr. Savage's own words 
in regard to himself, those of us who have had no such 
experiences, while * ' we doubt neither his intelligence nor 
his honesty, do not believe a single word that he tells us." 
(G. P. Putnam's Sons.) 

Some very good fun is to be found in the pages of J. 
Storer Clouston's Adventures of M. d Haricot,— a French- 
man who, having dallied with political intrigue, thinks 
himself pursued by the Government, and determines to 
conceal himself in London disguised as an American. 
He tells his own story, a caricature at once full of fun and 



A ONE-SIDED AFFAIR. 



LIFE 



8? 




(Harper and Brothers. 



free from malice. 
$1.50.) 

Mr. Charles Frederic Goss, in The Loom 
of Life^ seems to have dreamed of blending 
Greek tragedy and modern fiction. *'If 
Sophocles came to Cincinnati," as it were. 
His story of a Kentucky girl of Greek line- 
age and classic training who adopts the r61e 
of a Fury to ruin the life of her betrayer is 
pedantic and wholly unconvincing. (The 
Bowen-Merrill Company, Indianapolis. 
$1.50.) 

Emmy Lou, Her Book and Hearty by 
George Madden Martin, is a dear story of a 
dear little girl. It is having a wide success, 
and it deserves it. (McClure. Phillips and 
Company.) 

Americans in Process, compiled by Robert 
A. Wood, is a book which, as it deals with 
the slum conditions in the North and West 
Ends of Boston, might appear to be of 
merely local interest. It will, however, be 
found, on account of its breadth of grasp 
and excellent presentation of its subject, 
worth the notice of civic and political 
workers throughout the country. Its title 



is a just and happy one. (Hougbton, MiJ- 
flin and Company. $1.60.) 

The Lightning Conductor, by r, K* and 
A. M. Williamson, is a comedy-romance 
founded upon the whim of an American 
heiress to travel from London to th^ Hiviera 
in a new motor-car. Some rather 
guide-booky descriptions of Ibe 
Chateaux visited by the way cali 
for hill -climbing powers in tht? 
reader, but the chapters devoted u> 
the action of the story are bright 
and amusing. (Henry Holt and 
Company.) 

Fwmitvre of the Olden Time, 
by Frances Clary Morse, is a^,--y 
compilation which will be a de-'^^^ 
light to all lovers of antique ' 
cabinet-work. Some three hun- 
dred pieces are illustrated and 
described, and there is an inter- 
esting chapter u|K>n the cele- 
brated cabinet makers. The 
volume is beautifully printed. 
(The Macmillan Company. 
$3.00.) 




Love and Louisa, by Effie 

Adelaide Kowlands (Mme. Al- 

banisi), recalls the fiction of the 

'80s when The Duchess and 

Bertha Clay sat upon the 

pedestals now occupied by the 

historical romancers. It is good 

-* of its kind, although the kind 

long since became known by 

the generic name of trash. (J. B. Lippin- 

cott Company, Philadelphia. $1.50.) 

J, B. KerfooU 



O' 



Congress. 

^F conrse it is not pleasant to be 
told that Congress will be able to 
do very little, dnring the present ses- 
sion, beyond passing the appropriation 
bills. The prospect of a long, hot 
summer, without general legislation of 
any sort in the meantime, is very 
sobering. 

What we seem to need is a perma- 
nent commission to attend to matters of 
graft. 

The principles of graft being now 
pretty well settled by the practice of 
upwards of a century, why should 
(Congress be burdened with the work 
of framing appropriation bills? Why 
should the body which has exclusively 
the initiative in legrislation be filling its 
time with the i)erformance of duties 
hardly more than clerical? 



Love on Skates. 



"U^ VERY pond a mirifor icy 
""^ For the arching skies above. 
Now Love goes on skates and, vick 

Versa, skates now go on Love ; 
And this little rascal kneeling 

At her feet, as you can see. 
Is young Cupid. How appealing, 

How insinuating he I 

Jealousies are sure to rankle 

In one's heart to see him put ^ 
First a hand upon an ankle. 

Then, another on her foot : 
He will take his time about it. 

Holding fast to heel and toe. 
Who can blame the boy ? No doubt it 

Is delight that makes him slow. 

So, securely let him shoe her 

With the blades of shining steel : 
On the ice one waits to woo her. 

If his heart does not congeal ^ 

Ere the god of Love has strapt her^ 

Skates upon her tiny feet. 
Then another chap and chapter 

Cupid's story will complete. 

Felix, Carm^en, 



Too Much. 

* IVf ^ <^^^^ter says you kissed her, 
"^^ sir, without notice.'* 
*' Well, sir, did she want me to serve 

a subpoena on her? *' 



90 



LIFE 




HIGH is the worst daily news- 
XMtper in the United States, and 
why? 

Life's Contest to decide this 
important qaestion is beginning 
to attract wide attention. Every 
one is invited to compete, and no daily 
newspaper in the country, no matter 
how bad it is, need suffer by being left 
out. Remember, that a Prize of Fifty 



THE WORST NEWSPAPER. 

Dollars in Gold is offered for the 
cleverest contribution showing why 
any particular daily newsxMiper is the 
worst in the United States. 
Conditions. 

Competitors most limit their arfoments to tbree 
hundred words each. 

Write on one side of the paper only. 

The contest will close March 1, 1908, and the 
award will be made as soon thereafter as the 
respective merits of the argnmente can be de- 
termined. 




POISON 




Number Five. 

rpHE owner of the 
^ Keic York Ameri- 
can — so-called because 
it is printed in red on 
white x)ax)er and, after 
seeing a copy, one has 
the blues — was seated 
athisdesk. He looked 
worried. Turning to 
his assistant, he said, 
" You say there have 
been no divorces or 
scandals in high so- 
ciety for next Sun- 
day's issue?" 

" Yes, sir," was the 
reply. 

" And no mammoth skeletons of 
animals of the time of Adam have been 
foimd? " asked Mr. Hearst. 
*• None, sir," said the assistant. 
** Well, we'll have to make the story, 
'Are There Ants on Mars ? ' the feature 
Sxmday. And also have an editorial 
on * The Effect of Intoxicating Liquor 
on a Calf.* And, by the way, did the 
Whiskey Trust take a double-page ad ?" 
<*Yes; and they want it in the edi- 
torial section, too,'' said the assistant. 
''That's all right. Also print that 
story, 'A New Drink to Stimulate 
Divorces.* What the people want is 
something to talk about, and we must 
excite them," said Mr. Hearst. 

" Shall we say much about your 
political affairs ? " asked the assistant. 
" Well— ahem — no. I am Congress- 
man," replied Hon. W. R. Hearst. 
"That's been mentioned; a Missouri 
paper now wants me for President in 
1904. If I can lower the morals of the 
American in any way, I may accept the 
nomination. However, I don't care to 
be noticed at present. A couple of 




pages in green and red about my po- 
litical affairs will be enough.*' 

Just then a newsboy on the street 
cried out, '* Bxtry American — A case 
of eggs busted in a runaway." 

E, F, Ckmch, 
Number Six. 

^HE worst daily 
newspaper in the 
United States is the 
Richmond Daily Pal- 
ladiumhec&TXBe : It con- 
tains no news ; is never 
funny ; has no policy because no editor; 
has no circulation because no policy; is 
unknown because it lacks circulation ; 
has no advertising because unknown ; 
is issued from an empty shack, without 
capital and without staff ; says noth- 
ing; means nothing; does nothing; 
goes nowhere; is never read and rarely 
seen. Is as useless as the hole in a 
doughnut or the curl in a pig's tail, 
and accomplishes the same results. 
How it exists and why are xmanswer- 
able questions because there are no 
answers. It does. That's all. 

C. //. Opper. 

Number Seven. 

" 'T^HERB are three kinds of journal- 
"^ ism here," a New York news- 
paper man once said ; *' New York 
journalism, Brooklyn journalism, and 
the Mail and Express. ^^ 

Life may be surprised to hear that 
the Mail and Express is not meant to be 
a funny paper. I tried to find out 
about it over the telephone, but learned 
that the paper had no telephone. Then 
I called on the city editor. 

"How do you get news without a 
'phone ? " I queried. 

"Doesn't our headline explain it- 
self?" the city editor asked wearily. 



The wtnnlnic arfnment will be printed, together 
with snch others aa maj aeem to Lips worthy of 
that dlaUngnlshed honor. 

Names and addresses of the writers shonld 
accompany all numoscrlpts. In no case wUi 
these be printed without permisHon of (he sender. 
Those who desire their manoscrlpts returned 
should enclose a stamped and addressed retnm 
envelope. 

Each manuscript may bear a psendonym which 
will be printed with the argnment. 

The Editors of Lira are to be the sole judges of 
the merits of the argumente. 

"The lighter matter comes by Mail, 
the heavier by Express." 

•* Is the Mail and Express a joke ? " I 
questioned. 

'* Some say so ; others think it a 
tragedy." 

** Who runs it?" 

" Any one who pays to," replied the 
city editor. 

*• Who edits it?" 

** I think," said the city editor yawn- 
ing, *' that the present editor is dead, 
but maybe he's only sleeping." 

We heard a rumbling sound. 

" Don't be alarmed," said the city 
editor. "That's only the managing 
editor snoring. He needs the rest, 
poor fellow ! Hasn't slept a wink for 
two hours." 

*• What kept him awake? " 

" The subscriber was seriously ill," 
replied the city editor. •* We were 
afraid we'd lose him." 

"Is he the man who signs letters 
< Constant Reader '? " 

**No," said the dty editor. 'Tm 
« Constant Reader.' " 

*' How about the European letters ? " 

*'The foreman of the decomposing 
room vmtes the weekly London letter. 
His father really was in London once." 

" Is the paper for sale ? " I asked. 

* * Two cents, ' ' replied the city editor, 
"or for forty-seven dollars you can 
have the whole thing, including the 
mortgage." 

« a « 

As I reached the street I saw an 
ancient newsman. 

** Extra I " he called. 

" What's the extra ? " I asked. 

" Big fire in Chicago in 1870 ! " he 
exclaimed. '* Extra I " 

The story had come by express. The 
package had been mislaid. Befugee. 



LIFE 



n 




EXPECTED JT. 
The Widow : i suppodb tou werb surprmed to bbab that poor dear biram went opp bo sudden ukb t 

NO, I ALLBBS SAID TO MESBLP, BP BTBB HIBAM 8TOBXEB GOT OUT OF HI9 WIPERS SIGHT BB'D HEY TBB DU IT MIOHTT SUDDINO. 



M 




Society. 

RS. BILLY DE SPLAY gives a theatre party of twenty 
uext Friday. It is hoped— and expected— that it will T>e 
iiinrrr and noisy. 

Next week society will be excited over the 
werifliag of Simpleigh A. Nass to Miss Blabbie 
Duzzjt. The bride is the only daughter of the 
Hou. Munnie Dnzzyt, onr esteemed Senator at 
W^tshington. 

Although fabulously wealthy, Mr. and 
Mrs. Ennyole Figure brush their own 
teeth just Uke ordinary people. Mrs. 
Figure was a Tubbs, being a first cousin 






of the Hon. Beetsngar Tubbs, part owner of the Capitol at Washington 

That was a curious experience that befell Mrs. General Electric last / 
Monday. She was all dressed for the opera, except putting on the last quart u 
of pearls, when the Greneral entered the chamber to say good-by. In / 
stepping, quite accidentally, upon some loose pearls, he fell upon the back of / 
his head, and one of his feet struck Mrs. Electric in the jaw. No damage 
was done, except that she had to remain silent during some of the acts 
that evening. 




lA *sw?( rrr* 



• ^ 








lij m 

Z o 



o ^ 

^ 5 

< i 

o 8 

Z M 

CO ^ 






94 



LIFE- 



'v-n* 




t t n i J r- 








Mr, Clyde FitCh Should Know Better, 

IE "bird *' in Mr. Clyde Fitch's newest 
cage is very much of a goose. The 
cage in which she is captured is an en- 
gagement to a rich man, which would not 
have been contracted if the bird, goose, or 
girl, called Bosalie, whom Mr. Fitch 
makes the heroine of his latest play," The 
Bird in the Cage," had even the proverbial 
sense to come in out of the wet. She is 
the poor-girl offspring of a New England 
&ctory, the proprietor of which wishes to 
marry her. She is in love with one of the 
&ctory hands, but doesn't know enough to 
know it. Therefore when the proprietor pro- 
poses, and couples with the proposal an agreement to buy unlimited 
Omega Oil for her lame Irish aunt's crippled knees, Bosalie takes 
the bait and becomes engaged. Incidentally there is a brother to 
the proprietor who wants to have entirely too much to do with hitf 
brother*s semi-idiotic ^nc««, and an Irish brother of the Irish 
aunt who hasn't anything whatever to do with the play except to 
delay the action and give Mr. Edward Harrigan a chance to 
appear on the legitimate stage. 

Mr. Fitch, perhaps, has no idea how much he and his play owe 
to Sandol Milliken. Any actress with a past, or less guileless and 
more mature in looks, would have evoked peals of laughter in this 
exhibition of superhuman innocence and stupidity. LittU Eva 
in ** Uncle Tom's Cabin " was an accomplished adventuress com- 
pared with this recent creation of Mr. Fitch's brain. But Miss 
Milliken is one of the few ingenues who has not acquired Ethel 
Barrymore's wise and wondering drawl, and, therefore, she almost 
makes one think at times that JRosalie might possibly have existed 
outside of an asylum for imbeciles. Besides that, Miss Milliken is 
very pretty, she has an infantile accent, big blue eyes, which open 
wide with childish surprise, and her hair is of the 18-karat golden 
shade largely affected by angels and saints. Of course, hair like 
this can be acquired at almost any drug-store, but in Bo8alie*8 case 
it seems almost credible. Mr. Harrigan's part is not essential, but 
it introduces the best stage Irishman of our generation. It must be 
admitted, though, that Mr. Harrigan, by his over-deliberation, de- 
tracts much from the enjoyment of his real humor of method. The 
rest of the cast is effective, in the case of Mr. Arnold Daly so much 
so that he is the most perfect stage cad we remember to have seen. 
Any actor who is cast for such a part deserves sympathy, but Mr. 
Daly does it so well that it is to be feared that on the Bocky 
Mountain circuit he might be made a target for the revolvers of the 
chivalrous natives. 

The last act of '* The Bird in the Cage " is an act of ingratitude 
on Mr. Fitch's part, to the matinee girl, who has contributed so 
much to his popularity and success. It is fit to rank with a similar 
scene in "The Conquerors," which means that it is unfit to be dis- 
cussed in Life. Under other than Syndicate management Mr. 
Fitch Mould have been advised for his own good to find another 




ending for his play. Lips would say to the better class of Mr. 
Fitch's admirers that " The Bird in the Cage " is not of sufficient 
value as a play to Justify their witnessing this revolting last act. 
• • « 

OVERS of Charles Dickens who think they are 
going to find at the Herald Square Theatre 
much of their author will be sadly disappointed. 
Stage versions of Dickens's wonderfUl character 
drawings have always been very far away from the 
clear-cut imprensions the writer conveyed 
to the minds of his readers. Here the 
Pickwick legend is frankly made merely 
the basis of a musical comedy of the usual kind. The costuming 
is in the mode shown by the illustrators of Dickens, and some of 
the well-remembered incidents of the book are brought in at in- 
tervals to Justify the title of the piece. The result, however, Is iar 
from unpleasant. The two Kleins— librettist and composer — liave 
brought together lines and tunes which are rather better than thoee 
found in the ordinary musical comedy of commerce. In fact, some 
of the musical numbers are very pretty and Mr. Charles Klein 
has stage-versioned the Dickens material in a way to make it ac- 
ceptable to Broadway and yet not seriously offend the most ardent 
admirer of the novelist. 

Mr. De Wolf Hopper is, of course, not Mr, Pickwick, although 
so described on the bill. But he is Ainnier than Mr. Hopper has 
been for some time, and is ably supplemented in the same way by 
Mr. Digby Bell as Sam Weller, Mr. Grant Stewart comes nearer 
Dickens in his Alfred Jingle than do any others in the cast. The 
Winkle, SnodgrasB and T%ipman are colorless, and the Mrt, BardeU, 
Fai Boy and TonyWeUer are entirely out of the Dickens idea, and 
not much in the musical comedy part of the production. A dimin- 
utive person named Marguerite Clark as PoQy, Sam's sweetheart, 
is clever out of all proportion to her siae. 

*• Mr. Pickwick " is a long way from Dickens, but it is a very 
fair sort of musical comedy built not exactly on Tenderloin lines. 

MetoaV€. 

UFE'S CONFIDENTIAL GUIDE TO THE THEATRES. 

Academy qf JtftMic.— ''Plorodora.** Everybody knows ** Florodora.** 

B€latco,^**The Darting of Uie Gods.** Thrilling and beantlfnlly pre- 
seated Japanese tragedy. 

^nxufiray.—'* The Sliver supper.'* Musical comedy. Fair. 

Ca«ino.—** The Cblnese Honeymoon.** Musical comedy. Better. 

CW/^Hon.—Jalla Martowe in " The Cavalier.** War-times play. Soil!- 
clently Interesting. 

/>a/y*«.—** The Billionaire.** Maslcal comedy. Adapted to the Tender- 
loin taste. 

Ofarden.—Mr. Sothem in ** If 1 Were King,*' Mr. MoOarthy*B scholarly 
play. Well set and well acted. 

OarrUk.-'Auuie Russell In " Mice and Men.** Notice later. 

Ilfrald Square.— De Wolf Hopper in " Mr. Pickwick." See above. 

Knickerlfocker.-~**Mr. Blaebeard.*' Notice later. 

ManhaUan.—** Mary of Magdala.** Worth seeing. 

New York.—** When Johnny Comes Marching Home.** Musical comedy 
with patrioUc airs. Not bad. 

Princess.— lA>u\B Mann In '* The Consul.'* Notice later. 

Savot/.—Un. Bloodgood In "The Girl with the Green Eyes.** Not pon- 
derous bat diverting. 

Victoria.— Bail Calne's **The Eternal C*ity.** A trifle prosy, bat fairly 
interesting. 

Wallaek^s.— "The Saltan of Sula.** Best of the musical -comedies now 
mnnlDg. 

Weber and Fields' s.—Bvaleaqne and vaadeville. Amusing. The persons 
who Infest the entrance are not tialn-robbers and road-agents. They are 
simply tlcket-specolators. 



LIFE 




Never. 

" '^T^HERB must be relief ! *' 

^ The mayor of the great city, as 
he rose and faced his confreres, was 
pale and determined. 

*'Tes, gentlemen/' he continued, 
"relief must come, and that right 
speedily. Never before, in the history 
of the world, has there been snch a 
congested locality as that in which we 
are now sitting. Millions every hour 
of the day are crowding and jostling 
each other in a mad whirl. Our trans- 
portation facilities, never adequate to 
the situation, have become hopelessly 
helpless. With our x)opulation in- 
creasing at such an alarming rate, it is 
not enough that we should conquer 
the situation as it exists at present, 
overwhelming as it is ; but it is nec- 
essary that we also provide for the 
future." 

A large, portly man now pushed his 
way to the front. 

'*Sir," he said, addressing the may- 
or, **I am one of the officers of the 



to say, has this great city by the 
throat. And I have listen€d to jrmr 
eloquence with much interest. But 
what you propose is impos^iltle. To 
iticreaBe the comfort of the 
gi^rs, we should need to put two 
conductors on each car, and select 
men who have good manners, to say 
nothing of ordering a lot of new cars. 
No, sir, we couldn't do it." 

"But why not?" asked the crest- 
fallen mayor. 

The great man smiled. 
"Why, my dear sir," he said, "we 
are now only making about 200 per 
cent, profit, and if we should do what 
you propose, there ia a strong proba- 
bility that it might be cut down to 199 
per cent." 

Pathos. 
nPHE pathos of the 
-*- Adjutant - Gen- 
eral urging young 
officers who have ho 
material resources 
beyond their pay not 
to marry unless they 
can ^ marry money 
will touch the heart 
of the great American 
people. 

The most of us 
marry and live pretty 
happily the bulk of 
the time after, on a 



95 

one hundred and sixteen dollars 
and sixty-seven cents per month, 
the pay of a second lieutenant, 
but who of us wishes the man who 
has drawn his sword in defence of 
the Fatherland to sift his ashes 
more than once, or to make his 
straw hats answer longer than 
about three seasons each ? 

Surely, we are in no mood, in 
these parlous times, to skimp the 
army. We are too keenly sensible 
of our national destiny, which we 
are liable to be called on to fulfill 
almost any day now. 

Seeing Things. 

"TTE thought he saw a crocodile 
-*— ^ A- weeping in the rain ; 
He looked again and found it was 
A novel by Hall Caine ; 
" The great increase in suicide," 
Said he, " I'll now explain." 

He thought he saw a battlefield, 
With corpses heaped up high ; ^ 

He looked again and found it was 
A dust-cloud in the sky. 

Said he : " I'll hike from here before 
The • devil ' carts whiz by." 

He thought he saw a field of filth, — 
Above the clouds hung gray ; 

He looked again and found it was 
A modern problem play ; 

" Of course," said he, ''a syndicate 
Has dividends to pay." 

He thought he saw some monkeys swing 

Upon a gilded tree ; 
He looked again and found it was 

A Newport social tea 1 
'* I think," said he, '* that tweedledum's 

The same as tweedledee." 

John N. HUliard. 




-I 9 • X - 



Bay : bat, boss, did toub barbxr hav£ much trouble in 



corporation that at present, I am glad good deal less than fabtikq tour horns in thb m iddlx ? 



9i 



LIFE- 



The Original Designations. 




tions were sent in by Mr. E. W. 
Snyder, 65 West Thirty-fifth Street, 
Bayonne, N. J., to whom has been 
sent Life's check for |500. 

Life congratolates Mr. Snyder and 
regrets that under the conditions of 
the contest all the competitors coold 
not have been snccessfnl. 



12 






14 



1. His Fiancee 

2. His Sister 

3. The Qlrl Wlio Bores Him 

4. His First Love 

5. The Girl He Flirts With 



2 
THCY ARi: 

The Olrl With Money 
The Girl Who JUted Him 
The Girl He Jilted 
The Girl His Mother Wants 
Him to Marry 



13 



8 



10. His Typewriter 

11. The Girl He Golfs With 

12. His Sister's Cham 

13. His Platonic Friend 
U. The Girl He Loves 



The Lament of the Sleepless. 

AFTER VENISON. 

A WAKE, awake, awake !— 
•^^■^ And the cold gray dawii I see ! 
And I would that sweet sleep would smother 
The wide-open eyes of me ! 

O well for the portly police 

As they tramp on their nightly way ! 
O well for the nightingale, too, 

Who can sleep through the livelong day. 

And the hateful hours go on, — 

And return they never will ; 
But O for the snatch of a vanished sleep, 

And the sound of a snore that is still I 

Break, break, break, 

At the foot of my bed, O Dawn I 
But I would give gold, in sums untold, 

For the ghost of a snooze or a yawn ! 

George Alison, 



The Successful Sheet 



Who Arc They? 

n^HE competition to ascertain which 
of Life's readers could most cor- 
rectly determine the faces answering 
the descriptions printed below them, 
closed on the fifteenth instant. The cor- 
rect designations were placed in a sealed 
envelope in October and remained 
there nntil the sixteenth of January. 
The Editor of Life was the only person 
who knew the contents of the envelope, 
which was opened in the presence of 
witnesses. To make sure of fair play, 
all the sheets entitled to compete were 
marked by a disinterested person be- 
fore the envelope was opened. Above 
will be found the heads with the 
original designations. The suc- 

cessful designations sent in by the 
person coming nearest to being correct 
will be found below. These designa- 




LIFE 



91 




* WHAT BSCKONINO DO TB KSEP, 
AND 8TSBR HBB BY WHAT STAB ? ** 

— Thf Sow^*— Kipling. 



LIFE 




THE "LAZY GERM'S" OPPOSITE. 
They've found the germs of this and tbat- 

Tbe germs of that and this — 
The germs that make us thin or fat, , 

The germs that make us ^iss; 
The germs that make us fall In love — 

I hope they'll never Jerk 
Their magic microscopes above 

The germs that make us work! 

The germ of laziness is found — 

Tom from his happy nest. 
He gallivants our systems 'round. 

And makes us long for rest. 
He is the germ of calm content 

That peacefully will lurk 
Unless there comes, on mischief bent. 

The germ that makes us work. 

The germ of laziness attacks 

Our heads and hands and feet. 
And makes a hammock to our backs 

Feel perfect and complete. 
He circles in tobacco smoke 

With pleasing smile and smirk; 
His sole exertion is to choke 

The germ that makes us work. 

The germ of laziness is found. 

Now we'll be tantalized 
By folks who will not have us 'round 

Unless we're pasteurized. 



f^ll^M^ 



They'll hold us in a grasp unkind 

And warn us not to shirk. 
And cry, "O, hurry up and find 

A germ to make him work!" 

— Chicago Tribune. 

Once, when the press in the Carson City Appeal 
had Just started to run, the late John Mackay 
rushed into the editorial sanctum and called to 
Sam Davis in an excited tone of voice : "Sam. stop 
the press! Stop the press!" 

"What's the matter, John?" 'Davis asked in 
alarm. 

"Why, old man Crooks" (famous for his stingi- 
ness) — "old man Crooks has Just presented a peck 
of apples to the orphans' home, and he'll be broken- 
hearted if you don't have a column and a half 
about it in the paper this afternoon." — Exchange. 

" Do you mean to tell me that you were paid for 
voting as you did?" 

"Well," answered Senator Sorghum, "I had to 
have some motive, didn't I? A man who would vote 
that way without any excuse at all would be an ex- 
ample of total depravity." — Washington Star. 

Many occupations have diseases which are more 
or less incidental to them, and literature is not 
exempt. The two most prevalent literary maladies 
are writer's cramp and swelled head. The unfor- 
tunate thing about writer's cramp is that it is 
never cured. The unfortunate thing about swelled 
head is that it never kills.—JIf. ^i. P. 



MR. DOOl-EY ON GENEROSITY. 
Whin a man begins makin' money In his youth 
at annjcthing but games iv chance, he niver can be- 
come gin'rous late in life. He may make a bluff 
at it. Some men are gin'rous with a crutch. Some 
men get the use of their gin'rosity back suddenly 
whin they ar-re in danger. Whin Clancy the miser 
was caught in a fire in th' Halsted Sthreet Palace 
Hotel he howled fr'm a window : "I'll give twinty 
dollars to annywan that'll take me down." Cap'n 
Minehan put up a laddher an' climbed to him an' 
carrid him to the sthreet. Half-way down th' lad- 
dher th' brave rayscooer was seen to be cbokin* 
his helpless burdhen. We discovered aftherwards 
that Clancy had thrled to begin negotyations to 
rayjooce th' reward to five dollars. His gin'rosity 
had become suddenly par'lyzed agalb. 

So if ye'd stay gin'rous to th' end niver lave 
ye'er gin'rosity idle too long. Don't run it ivry 
hour at th' top Iv its speed, but fr'm day to day 
give it a little gintle exercise to keep it supple an' 
hearty an* in due time ye may injye it. — Front 
Observations by Mr. Dooley. 

Herb is another Dr. Parker story. He was argu- 
ing with a man on the problem of continued exist- 
ence, and at the door the friend declared finally : 
"The fact is, I am an annihilationist. I believe 
that when I die that will be the end of me." 
"Thank Qod for that !" exclaimed the doctor, and 
banged the door. — New York Tribune. 



Life is for sale by all Newsdealers in Great Britain. The International News 
Company, Bream's Building. Chancery Lane, London, E. C, England, Agbnts. 



Established 1823. 

WILSON 

WHISKEY. 

That's All! 



THE WILSON DISTILLING CO., 
Balumore, Md. 




Neglect of a Coogh or Sore 

Throat maf retvlt In an la- 

i cnrable Throat Troable or 

r CoatampttOB. For relief 

le BB0WH*8 BRONCHIAL 

TB0CHI8. Hothlag excels 

this simple remedy. Sold only 1b boxea. 



CHESTER. CR.EST. 

Nortli Fottrth Ave., Mouat Yeraoa, N. Y. 

A quiet resort with every comfort, for 
men nervously disordered through dissipa- 
tion. Communications strictly confidential. 
Address G. S. Avery, Manager. Telephone 
A. Mount Vernon. 



"THE NAME IS EVemmUNG.'* 

Esterbrook 



00 a P£Q Is 



Prof ess iooal 
Expert 
Favorite. 
Over 150 
other styles 
every pui 
stationers 
Accept no 



Its excdleojpe 



X0.A1. The 

Penman's 

Very elastic. 

varieties of 

to suit 

'pose- All 

Have thesL 

substitute* 



THE Esterbrook Steb. pen Ca 

¥reffti.CMrfi«,N.J MMHiSlrMiN.V. 



'Always Leading 




COCDA-niHDCOLKrE 

linBg uallBdinPuHlTY- 'FiAVDR 

ALL GROCERS' 



^^ SEKVED 

lIOHinAINS 
CAFES 




lOIL^EAK STOMACHS 

'^ AFLEASANT AlO) 

AGK££ABLE BEVERAGE 
>SKMOTXR fiwCOMBftWY, CHICAGO 



-m 



SOLDIN 
BOTTLES 

BY 




MOLETTESdvCZAR 



THE EVER FASHIONABLE PERFUME OF 
ORIZA-L. LEGRAND (Orand Friz Paris 1900> 



LIFE 




" \^AIT a moment, girls, and let me play 
the piano for you before you go. I 
want you to hear what artistic effects I can 
obtain. With the aid of my new Angelus I 
can play with the same wonderful power as 
the greatest pianists. See how I can phrase 
and shade and how I can accent a note when- 
ever required, but, most astonishing of all, 
how / can subdue the accompaniment and bring 
out clearly the melody either in the treble or in 
the bass.*' 

••IP YOU HAVE AN ANGELUS 
you can play anything, from a Chopin Noc- 
turne to * Mr. Dooley,*and it is so delightful 
to be able to sit down and play a piece of 
music as it ought to be played. You know 
that the technique will be perfect and the 
expression you give yourself, just as you 
would if you were playing with your own 
fingers and had your foot on the pedal." 

'*The Angelus costs only $250.00, and if I 
could not obtain another I would not part 
with mine for anything in the world, for it 
has made music more real to me than I could 
ever have imagined." 

Illustrated book given to 



inquirers. 



THE WILCOX & WHITE CO. 

Main OfioM and Faetorj, Maridaii, Conn., U. S. A. 

SOLD BY 

The Oliver Ditson Co., Boston. 

John Wanamaker, New York. 

Joelg & Co., Baltimore and Washington. 

John Wanamaker, Philadelphia. 

S. Hamilton, Pittsburg. 

Geo. P. Bent, Chicaeo. 

The Estey Co , St. Louis. 

Sherman, Clay & Co., San Francisco. 

The W. G . Woodmansee Piano Co., Cincinnati. 

The J. T. Wamehnk & Sons Piano Co., Cleveland. 

J. Herbert Marshall, Regent House, Regent St., London. 

And other local agencies throughout the country. 



TUB IBWSST for bag 
PLATJrORM punching 

MOLINE 

Platform tt 4 O 

WITHOUT BaO 9 I ^^ 

Teed by all the leading pro- 
fessional bag punchers and by 
boxers in training. 

Catalogue of Athletic Goods J^r 

A.«.SPALDINt&BROS. 

New York, Chicago, Denver, Balllmore, Buffalo, 
Philadelphia, St. I^uis, Boston, Minneapolis, 
Kansas City, San Francisco, Montreal, Can. 
_^ liQDdon, Eng. 





When you 
play with 

Bicycle 

Playing Cards 
you hold 
Good Cards. 

Bicycle cards always wear well. 
Sold by dealers. Popular price. 
Order by name. 29 backs. Design 
shown is "Automobile" back, 
copyrighted, 1902, by 

The U. S. Playing Card Co. 
Cincinnati, U S. A. 

We wUI send 128-pa(;e Condensed Hoyle 
for 10c stamps, if addressed to Dept. 51. 



LEADAMS SHOE TREES 



'■Keppd Shoe It^c in vour 
I Shoe wJven tll« feet [» out.** 

Drivp* thff curt fmm lime Voc. 
Ke«lo«^ oi-kMiifll iicwni^tis^ 
Kt^t-|ji» tilt flijJf fljit, 

Man's antt Wamttf'n Stttf*M, ^t^ 
J at yoi/r Shtf^ Deitfwf or fiittet 
I front 

LIONEL M. LEADAM 

13fl FALMKTTO STftKKtj BBftOtLYK 



WITHOUT TkKKs^, 



' Thf Ltrtmuf Do€si It:' 



WITH ri££l:-J5. . 



Buffalo Uthia Water 

Wh&t the Medical Profession thinks of it as a 
Remedy in Bri^ht's Disease, Albuminuriat 
Calculit Gout, Rheuma^tism, and all Uric 
Acid Troubles. ''The Most Valuable Min- 
eral Water in Use.V 

Dr. Graeme M. Hammond, of New York, Pro fessor 0/ Diseases of the Mind 
and Nervous System in the New York Post-Graduate Medical School and Hospital: 
<* Inall casesof BRIQHT'S Kitwrni n I PTUIM lAtorPD <>' the greatest 
DISEASE I have found IHIErilUl LI 1 nut llfUBK service in in- 

creasingtlie quantity of urineand in ELIMINATING the ALBUMEN. In GOUT 

and RHEUMATISM it is highly ■%„. - - _ _f^ ■ •««■««« WkMmmwmmw^ as the most 

beneficial. I have long regarded dUFEALO LITHIA nKTER valuable 
mineral water in use." 

Dr. Wl if ia m Doug hty, former Professor of Materia Medica and Thjrapeutics, 
Medical College of ^^H mg sgCTA 1 ITlfffS IBBIVII ^^ ^^^ ^"^^ reliable treat- 
Georgia, Augusta: DUnrJllJIJ lilllUA lUllUl mcnt known to me for 
the permanent relief of gravel, and the antecedent conditions that determine it.** 

Dr. J. T, LeBianchard, Professor Montreal Clinic, SM., SN, V. U,: **I 
have OiiVBmv^ t WMmnM. lillFI'm in most obstinate cases of Chronic Infiam- 
uscd DVfTAUl Lll nlA Will UC mation of the Bladder, in Stone of the 
Bladder, in Uric Acid Gravel, with the most efficacious results.'* 

Dr. P. B. Barringer. Chairmanof Faculty and Professor of Physiology, Uni' 
versityof Virginia,: ** Alter an experience of more than twenty years, I have no 
hesitancy in stating that for prompt results ||i|«VM « f^ \ vnillM llfl'ITfl 
I have found nothing to compare with DUC MIUI Mil I fUA Wiil UI 
in preventing Uric Acid deposits in the body." 

BUIEAIJO LITHIJI WKTER ^ ^^^ ^^^ ^^ Grocers and Drag^sts generaUy. 
Testimonials which defy all imputation or questions sent to any address. 
PROPRIETOR BUFFALO LITHIA SPRINGS, VIRGINIA. 



''Wpl 







THE WINNER'S PLACE. 
To win the matrimonial race — 

O all ye maids who try — 
You're lucky if you get a place 
Resulting In a tie. 

— Philadelphia Preaa. 

Fob convenience, really superior hotel service 
for select patronage, and climate, there is nothing 
for New Yorkers quite like Lakewood, New Jersey. 
Laurel House. 
Laurbl-in-the- Pines. 

Thbbb had been a lUlgbt shock of earthquake, 
and Mr. nerlihy and Mr. Dolan had both felt it. 

"lim." said Mr. Dolan. solemnly, "what did 
you think whin flrrst the ground began to trimble?" 

*' 'Think !' " echoed his friend, scornfully. 
"What man that had the use av his legs to run and 
his loongs to roar would waste his tolme thinkin'? 
Tell me thot!" — youth*a Companion. 

ELECTRlC-LiGHTCO TRAIN TO CALIFORNIA. 
Tbb "Overland Limited" via Chicago and North- 
Western. Union Pacific, and Southern Pacific Rail- 
ways, has electric reading lamps in every berth; 
long distance telephone service, buffet-library carti 
(with barber and bath), compartment observation 
cars, and dining cars. All agents sell tickets via 
thi* route. 

A TE8TI1IONIAL : Mme. Yale : The other day I 
accidentally dropped a pickle into some of your 
famous face wash, and when I fished it out with 
a hair-pin much to my surprise I found the wrin- 
kles and warts all eradicated. Yours. Miss Vera 
Symple. — Exchange. 

Beautiful trip to Old Point Comfort. Va. ' Go 
while you can. Children ought to see historic Fort 
Monroe. Send postal to the Chamberlin for a 
booklet. 

First Oateman: Who is that woman who ha:* 
asked twenty times in the last five minutes about 
the schedule for fear her train will get away? 

Second Gateman : She's headin' a bunch o' 
delegates goin' down t' a meet in' o' th' American 
League o* Don't Worry Clubs. — Baltimore Netoa. 

Bur U for it In a wine of exquisite bouquet. Cbot*« 
Imperial Extra Dry Champagne. It Is far superior to any 
other. 

"Thet tell me, professor, you have mastered 
all the modern tongues." 

"Well, yes ; all but my wife's and her mother's." 
— Pennaylvania Punch Bowl. 

"Old friends are best'* — a particularly appropriate 
truism when applied to the world-famous Williams' Shaving 
Soap, which has held first place In the toilet requisites ot 
fastidious men /or more tban half a century. In its purity, 
delicate perfume and superabundance of rich, creamy 
lather, it stands without a peer. If you sbave yourself and 
have not tried it, you have a delightful experience coming. 
Ask for " Yankee Shaving Stick " in metal case. For sale 
everywhere. 

"What is it that makes men great, papa?" 
"Persistent advertising, my son." — Cleveland 
Plain Dealer. 



•LIFE- 

Time has Worked Wonders 
in the Brewing Industry 

It is not like Americans to stand still : they must ever strive to 
meet new conditions and new needs, with new effort and re- 
newed success. Take for instance the bnttline of 

EVANS' 
ALE 



by its maker at the brewery. English brewers leave 
the bottling of their product to outsiders — that'* not 
the Evans* wav — and the result is that Evans' Ale is 
leaving all others far behind. 

The nearest dealer will sopplj it. 

V. n. ETANM dc »ON8 

EsUbltohed 1716 Hudson. H. T. 



Upholstery. 

Hangings and Furniture Coverings. 
Cretonnes and Linen Taffetas. 

Ruffled Muslin and Madras 

Curtains. 

Slip Covers, Beds and Bedding. 

Hotel and Yacht Work a Specialty. 

EsiimaUs Furnished on Reqtust. 



NEW YORK. 



ANNUAL STATEMENT OF 



THE MANHATTAN LIFE INSURANCE COMPANY 



NEW YORK. 
HENRY B. STOKES, 



President. 



Total Payments to Policyholders Since Organization and Amount Now Held 

P6r Their Benefit. 



$67,792,736.22 



B « , RECEIPTS IN 1902. ^^^^^^aa^c 

For Premiums $2,254,266.35 

For Interest and Rents 872,253.03 



DISBURSEMENTS IN 1902. 

For claims by death, and matured endowments 

Return to Policyholders (dividends, annuities and surrendered policies) 

Total Payments to Policyholders 

Taxes, Commissions and all other expenses 



$3,126,519.38 

$1,445,250.23 
297,446.82 

$1,742,697.05 
945,700.09 

$2,688,397.14 

$3,543,648.75 

6,146,210.00 

834,024.04 

4,955,283.15 

1,232,201.73 

146,605.23 

256,661.08 

286,556.74 

LIABILITIES. $17,401,190.72 

Policy Reserve (as Computed by New York Insurance Department) $ 1 5,27 1 ,779.00 

All other liabilities 1 45,077.04 

FUND TO PROVIDE FOR POSSIBLE DEPRECIATION IN ASSETS 100,000.00 

Surplus Si, 884,334.68 ««*'5i6,856.04 

We, the undersicned, a Committee elected by the Board of Directors of the Manhattan Life Insurance 
Company to examine the accounts of the Company, hereby certify that wc have carefully examined in 
detail the assets of the Company, and that they are correctly shown in the foregoing statement. The 
liabilities shown include the reserve on policies in force as calculated and certified to by the New York 
Insurance Department. 

N. F. PALMER, WALTER C. STOKES, 

EDWARD S. RAPALLO, SIMEON FORD, 



ASSETS JANUARY Irr, 1903. 

United States and other Bonds owned by Company 

Bonds and Mortgages, first lien 

Loans on Stocks and Bonds 

Real Estate owned by Company 

Loans and Liens on Policies in force 

Cash in Bank and on hand 

Net Deferred Premiums and Premiums in Course of Collection. 
Interest due and accrued, and all other assets 



n 



Committee; 



Total Insurance in force $67,519,305.00 



GAIN 



IN SURPLUS, GAIN IN INSURANCE WRITTEN, 

GAIN IN ASSETS, GAIN IN INSURANCE IN FORCE, 

GAIN IN INCOME. 



OLD eROW RYE 



A lAri1lCM/*I2^1.7 H. B. KIRK * CO., 

STRAIGHT WrllOlVl^Y SOLE BOTTLERS. NEW YORK. 



'astest Trains in the World— On the New York Central. 



•LIFE 



No Dinner is Complete 



WITHOUT A GLASS OF 



Chartreuse 

QRSBN OR YBLLOW 



THIS FRENCH 
LIQUEUR FOR 



^^3^3^^l 300 years 



HAS BEEN THE 
PREFERRED 
AFTER-DINNER 
COR DIAL OF 
POLITE SOCIETY 



At flnUdMs Win* M«chM»to,Oroe«m.Hotol«,C^ 
BStkr ft Co., 45 Broadway, New York, N. Y. 
^^ Sole Xfinto for uiited Sutea. 




GOUT & RHEUMATISWi 



u«tiJi« Great Eni:ll&h Remedy 

BLAIR'S PILLS 



S«fi&t 5iir»» Effective. 50c, 4, $ 1 , 



THE CITY OP NEW YORK, 

DEPARTMENT OF TAXES AND ASSESSMENTS, 

MAIN OFKICE. BOROUGH OF MANHATTAN, 

NO. 280 BROADWAY, STEWART BUILDING, 

January 12. 1908. 
NCXriCB IS HEREBY GIVEN, AS REXJUIRBD 
by the Greater New York Charter, that the hooka 
called "The Annual Record of the Assewed Valuation 
of Real and Personal Estate of the Boroughs of Man- 
hattan. The Bronx, Brooklyn. Queens and Richmond, 
comprlslnic The City of New York." will be open for 
examination and correction on the second Monday of 
January, ^nd inrlU remain open uiLtil the 

1ST DAY OF APRIL, 1003. . 

During- the time that the books are open to public 
inspection, application may be made by any person 
or corporation claiming to be aggrieved by the as- 
sessed valuation of real or personal estate to have the 
eame corrected. ^ . ^ - 

In the Borough of Manhattan, at the main office of 
the Department of Taxes and Assessments, No. 280 
Broadway. _ ^ ^ . ^^ 

In the Borough of The Bronx, at the office of the 
Department, Municipal Building, One Hundred and 
Seventy-seventh Street and Third Avenue. 

In the Borough of Brooklyn, at the office of the De- 
partment. Municipal Building. 

In the Borough of Queens, at the office of the De- 
partment Hackett Building, Jackson Avenue and 
Fifth Street. Long Island City. « - .w 

In the Borough of Richmond, at the office of the 
Department. Masonic Building. Stapleton. 

Corporations In all the Boroughs must make appli- 
cation only at the main ofBce in the Borough of Man- 
Applications in relation to the assessed valuation of 
peieonal estate must be made by the person assessed 
at the office at the Department In the Borough where 
such person resides, and In the case of a non-resident 
carrying on business In The City of New York, at 
the office of the Department of the Borough where such 
place of business Is located between the hours of 10 
A. M. and 2 P. M., except on Saturday, when all ap- 
plications must be made between 10 A. M. and W 

°^"* JAMES L. WELLS. President, 

WILLIAM S. COGSWELL. 
GEORGE J. GILLESPIE. 
SAMUEL STRASBOURGER. 
RUFUS L. SCOTT, 
OommlAsionerB of Taxes and Assessment!. 



DOMINION LINE toEUROPZ 



..i 



^ 



Boston to Qaeenstown and Liverpool 

^, S. Comfnoiiw*^altll. 1 3,0«0 t<>n»i 

Vs^.tHii-rfii. • ia,OOatoiiii 

S, S. merlon, * ll,63i>toun 

^MEOITERRAHEAN SERVJCEI^ 
niTsirr^ dirett to Azores* O I brills r, 
I AlijlpnifCieiio** ^ai»l#i«i[]d \le^- 
^ A II (1 rt a ■ Semi for 1 1 1 u* iratiKi fkto kJfl t, 
DOMINION LINE 

tjtl hejirlrnni Street, Ctuoiot* 
, 1123 Broutlwii>\ - New Xuns. 



FIVE POINTS OF EXCELLENCE. 



Leaving the center of the city from which yon start; reach- 
ing the center of the city of yonr destination ; over smooth 
and level tracks ; giving rest and comfort ; riding beside 
mnning waters most of the way ; throngh the centers of popu- 
lation to the gateways of commerce ; when yon travel by the 



NEV YORK CENTRAL LINES> 



A copy of the 52-page Illaitrated Gataloiraeof the " Foor-Track Series ♦* will 
be sent free upon receipt of a two cent stamp by George H. Daniels, General 
Pasienger Agent, Mew fork Central A Hudson River RaUroad, Grand Central 
Station, New York. 



ABBOTTSom^mALANGOSTURABlITERS 




No train in America is more brilliantly lighted than the 

Colden State Limited. 

Electric lights are everywhere — in the roofs, on the sides of the 
cars, in the berths. This last feature is worthy of special note, 
for it not only enables one to undress in comfort, but also, in 
case one wishes, to read in bed. The berth lights arc conven- 
iently placed and can be turned on and oif at pleasure* 

The Golden State Limited leaves Chicago djiily 
via the EL Faso-Rock Tslaod route. Lca^ than three 
day^ to Loa Ani|:«l&^. T)iTCi^ car$ to Santn Barbara and 
San Fraqcl^co. Compartimtnt and standard s]i^cpc^s; 
diniQ|i7. library, and Dbservation cars. Lowest altitudes 
of any Hne across the contmpv;t. Tickets and full Iw 
bmiatbii at any T^llroad ticket office > or by addresaLog 

Jno, Sebastlafl, RT.M., Cblcago, lU. 




LIFE- 



JinoaiT 29. IMS. 




The correct thing for gen- 
tlemen who shave. 

The acme of luxury, con- 
venience and refinement, 

fW^. Tu^frff_r*M'* Cftts, iff ail DrIilfislSy 

^Tbc J. B. WllUama Co.. aiABtonbury, Ct. 




The Nig/test Type of French Champagne 
CODMAN & HALL CO- 

BQSWH. ... mASS, 



DR.SIEGERTS 

i BITTERS 



tmporiedfrom THmtkid BMl, 



\ 22 GOLD MEDALS 

\QOH IB&2 LONtKJN igSfe 

y^j VIENNA rezi p^Risf ;;?; 
T/?e On/y Genuine 



TTnrlYftlk'<) «i)p«tiBiQer to^lc And at^ipaiBch 
<:o?Tf«tivi'. Rictioimi'iKleil by ptjyaiL'iiiiti)i 
for tnvAiid? Jtn*^ cunvalescenta. Lends the 
ftmiiimiSc frajerance i*( ihc iropSea lo ynur 
llqiuiT. BiJiAtiri! or c)icap doint^mtic: ^utjvti- 
luti'H and LmiTAticttiM. Tti,c t^ennfne fa infide 

DR. J. O. B. SIEOERT & SONS, 

J. W. WUPPERMANN, Sole Aetnt, 

NEW YORK, N. Y. 




^ ClG ARETTEf 

A STANDARD OF 

CXCELLCNCC UN5URPA5JED 



The only PURE and COBRECT ARTIPICIAL 
MINERAL Waters sold in America to-day. 

CARBONIC, ARTIFICIAL VICHY. 
SELTERS, CLUB SODA. Etc.. 

are also pat up In bottles for oat of town 
delivery, and oan be sent by freight or 
exorew to any part of the united States. 
Orders to 

CARL H. SCHULTZ 

Tel. 142 Madison Sq. 48(M44 First Ave., N. Y. 




JAflAICA 



5"p%<ffS WEST INDIES 

An ideal spot in which to spend a winter's vacation 
and avoid all the extremes of the northern climate. 

UNITED FRUIT CO/S 
STEAMSHIP LINES 

operate weekly between BOSTON and PHILADEL- 
PHIA and JAMAICA, the magnificent twin-screw 
U. S. Mail Steamships : 
Admiral Dewey Admiral Sampson 

Admiral Schley Admiral Parragut 

Raillags Weekly from Boston and Philadelphia 
Fare for ronnd trip, Inclading stateroom accommo- 
dations and meals, $75 ; one way, $40. 

Send for oar beavtifal booklet whether yon eoatem- 
plate the trip or not 

UNITED FRUIT COMPANY 

Pier 5, North Wharves, 
PHILA. 

Fall Information and Tickets of Local Agent 



Long Wharf, 
B03TON 




Loxfer 

who has not tasted 

Veuve Clicquot 



has yet to learn whj it costs more 

to produce than any other wine 

In the market. 




Titan of 
Chasms 

The Grand Canyon of 
Arizona. The great 
round world has nothing 
like it. Comfortably 
reached by rail on the 
way to California, any 
day in the year. Excel- 
lent hotels and safe trails. 

"Titan of Chasms** pam- 
phlet mailed free— or send 
500 for t>eautifui Grand 
Canyon book with illu- 
minated cover, containing 
special articles by noted 
travelers, authors and 
scientists. Address Gen- 
eral Passenger Office, At- 
chison, Topeka & Santa 
Fe Railway, Chicago. 

Santa Fe 



: J. W. PRATT CO.* new VOMK* 



VV/LfUiTiEi y\bi« 



Entered at the New York Post Office as Second-Glass Mall Matter. 
Oopyrlght, 1'902, by Lifb P(JBli8hino Company. 



/ /7 I/- . / 




/ 



uf,j/r,gM, I90:(, 6» Ai/r /»i,,',. ,#Arfiy To. 



UNDtH THE ACT or 10B1, 



LIFE 









^^^^^^ y4^T0M0BILES 

are used by people of discriminating judgment and refined taste, 
because their reliability has been proved by seven years of successful 
service, while in style, finish and elegance of equipment, they are 
superior to all other vehicles, 

TAe COLXTMVIA. tine for 1903 includes aur ne^ 

Columbia Gasolene Touring C^r* Four cylinders. 20 H P, nominaK (Actual Brake 

H, V. 2(k) Must efficient and handsomest American^made car. 
Columbia^ Electric Light RufY0i.baut> ITTidersiung battery, leavinR body entirely 

open. 
Columbisi £Iectric Rea.r*drlven Coupe. Combining distincttvc features of Uoib 

ihe Brougham and Hansom types^ 
Columbia^ EMectric In side -ope retted CotJpe. Dispensing with necessity Un «ep^rate 

driver. Especially desirable fur physicians. 
Columbia £]ectric Spect&l Service Wivgon. For inspectors, ^iuperintrndenis, fire 

and ptjlice chiefs^ and others rt quiring high-powered elecinc autotnubiles aiapted to 

hard service. 
Ulectrlc Delivery W&gons ai\d Trucks- Entirely new mcwlels, containing many 

exclusive features* 
Colximbia Electric '^Seabright'" Runabouts, Victorias, Surreys, Tonneaus, 

Cekbrjolets, Opera 'Buses, a.nd Broughams, which were unqualified Ly success- 
ful during ujn2, are perpetuated with various improvements. 



N^ se 



CMalo^ue ^M\\\ be sent qti request, alaa Se^clal Bulletins cover- 
Ing comptete det&H&d Inforrrt&tion for each vehicle sup&ratety^ 



^ ^ 



ELECTRIC VEHICLE COMPANY 

HARTFOItD. CONN. 

ftltW YOIIK SUESROOUt 134'136-llS West 39tfi Street 

BOSTON; 41^5 Columbus A^snuo CHICAGO: 1421 Michigan Avenue 




LIFE 



GUARANTY TRUST COMPANY OF NEW YORK. 

MUTUAL LIFE BUILDING. NASSAU, CORNER CEDAR STREET. 
LONDON OFFICES 83 LOMBARD STREET, E. C. 60 ST. JAMES STREET, S. W. 

Fiscal Agents of the United States Government. Manila, PblUppine Islands. Hong Kong, 
China. Depository of the Government of the Philippine Islands, Manila. 

Capital, $2,000,000. 
Sarpli8 aid Undivided Profits, $5,180,000. 

INTERBST ALLOWED ON DEPOSITS subject to cheque or on certificate. 

Acts as Trustee for Corporations. Firms and Individuals: and as Guardian, 
Executor and Administrator : Takes entire charge of Real and Personal 
Estates ; carefully selected securities offered for investment 

TRAVELERS* LETTERS OF CREDIT 

ATiillable In nil parts of th« 'world. 

COIVIflERCIAL LETTERS OF CREDIT ISSUED. 

DRAFTS on all parts of Great Britain. France, Germany, China, and Philippines 
eOVtiHT and SOLD. 



WALTER G. OAKMAN, President 
GEORGE K. TURNBULL, 2d Vlce-Prest. 
WM. 0. EDWARDS, Treasurer. 
E. C. HEBBARD, Secretary. 



ADRIAN ISELIN. JR., Vice-President. 
HENRY A. MURRAY, 3d Vice-President. 
JOHN GAULT. Manager Foreign Department. 
F. C. HARRIMAN, Assistant Treasurer. 



George F. Baker. 
George S. Bowdoln, 
August Belmont, 
Frederic Cromwell, 
Walter R. GUlette, 
G. G. Haven. 
£. H. Harrlman. 



R. C. NEWTON, Trust Officer. 

DIRECTORS: 
R. Somers Hayes. 
Charles R. Henderson. 
Adrian Iselin.jr., 
Augustus D. JuiUiard, 
James N. Jarvie. 
Richard A. McCurdy, 
Levi P. Morton, 



Alexander E. Orr. 
Walter G. Oakman, 
Henry H. Rogers, 
H. McK. Twombly, 
Frederick W. Vanderbilt, 
Harry Payne Whitney. 



I^ondon Committee t ARTHUR J. FRASER. chairman; DONALD C. HALDEMAN. 



Santa Fe 

all the Way 

You leave Chicago on the Caltfor- 
nia Limited. In less than three 
days you are in California. It's 
Santa Fe all the way— train, track 
and management. 

Shortest line. Chicago to Los Angeles and San Diego. 
A direct route to San Francisco. Only line to Grand Can- 
yon of Arizona. 

Money cannot provide a finer train. Think of a travel 
comfort : here it is. Cosy compartment Pullmans, sunny 
observation parlor, a well-selected library, electric lights ; 
also bufifetsmoking car, with barber shop and daily stock 
reports. But the crown of it all is the dining-car serv- 
ice — Harvey's best, which is best in the world. Con- 
vincing tacts in booklets. 

Our other daily trains to California carry standard 
Pullmans, tourist sleepers and chair cars. 

Atchison, General 

Santa*re SflLTltflL JC 6 ^^^^^ 

Railway. ^i^ 1^**^1^ ^. ^^ Chicago. 



UheWOS ''SCobile'' 



DEVELOPED TO THE HIGHEST STATE OF PERFECTION. 

Through more than a Million Miles of Experience^ including single journeys of a 
thousand miles over such rough country as that from Seattle to San Francisco, and the 
carrying of more than 50,000 passengers by a single Gnnpany using Rapid Transit 
vehicles* 

A $550 *' Mobile" for Two Persons. 

A $^,060 Delhrery Wagon for Mefchants. 

Twenty-four styles of carriages, including coupes, touring wagons, Victoria 
runabouts, omnibuses, many styles di delivery wagons, surreys, etc* 

Do Not Tail to Send for 

The 1903 "Mobile" Catalogue 

— a "work of art — before considering the question of buying* 

It contains 32 pages of interesting information about the automobile problem. 

ffhe "S^obile" Company of 3tmerica. 



JitDsti 
$550 



Czecuti'T** Sales and Storage Offices s 
" MolMle " Bulling, Broadway ^ 54th St, 
NEW YORK. 



Factory : 

Philipte Manor Station, 

N. Y. C. €r H. R. R. ON-THE-HUDSON. 



L 



LIFE 




THE PERFECT PIANO PLAYER 



s the only one which a 
woman can operate 
without fatigue, and 
is the only piano 
player whose touch 
is absolutely non- 
m echan ic a L We 
prove all we claim if 
you give us the op- 
portunity. Address: 

Farrand Organ Co., Dept. L, 

DETROIT. MICH. 





Leave Chicago this evening on the 

Golden State Limited 

via thci E! Paso- Rock Island route and in 
less than thres days you will arrive at Los 
Angeles, 

An hour laler you can be on the shores of 
the Pacific, listening to the roar of the surf, 
drinking in the wine-like air ; the bluest of 
blue skies above you and the most charming landscapes In 
America all about you. ThJs> mind you, at a time of year 
when the thermometer at home is 'way below zero and the 
newspapers are filled with details of the '- greatest snow- 
storm in years/' 

Cut our thb ftd and mail it* with name and address, 
^ and beautifully illustrated book about California" will 
in be sent free. Tickets, berths and ftiU Inforination at 
this office. 




ALL flOAOS ALIKC TO 



'She Oldsmobile 

Twenty-three years of cxpericni.c iu yAi^oJinc 
motor and automobile manufaclu re is rmhiHjR'il un 
the construction of this practkai aatomobilt- 

Tlie UJdsitiobik was the firtt American runa* 
bout t& be placed in ihe hand^of the public, and Iu 



Wide popularity among 
Auto users makes it the 
favorite with prospec- 
tive pur<:ha!«ers. 

Flattered by imitation 
buc unsuccessfully opposed \%\ 
Spued, Endurance and Reltabitity coniesifi, and 
tn all tests for real merit, the Oldsmobile it still 
the cJitapest reliable auiomobile made. 
Price $650, 
Call on any of our 58 SeUing Agents ur 
write for il lost rated booli to Dept. J. 

Olds Motor Works 

Detvott, Mich. 




Operators of writing machines^ espedallf skilkd opera- 
tors, prefer the REBDIHGTON, and for very good reasoas. 

The Best Results 

in the Amount and Quality of work done, and tbe Ease and 
Spe^d with which it is done, are attained only through the 
use of the t^ ♦ rws , 

Remmgton Typewritt 



105 



LI 






FEB ?> v^y\ 

r E B P U A P Y 




106 



LIFE 




looks, and even while our pride suffers 
there is a certain amount of encourage- 
ment in reali2sing how far we have 
come. 



*' H'hiU there is Life there's HopeP 

VOL XLl. FEB. 6, 1903. No. 1068. 

19 Wkst Thirty-First St., New York. 



Published every Tnursday. $&.00 a year In ad- 
▼auce- Postage to foreign countries In tbe Postal 
UnloD, |l.(»l a year extra. Aiinsle current conies, 
10 cents. Back nambem, after three months from 
dAte of pubhcatlon. 26 cents. 

No contribution will be returned unless 
accompanied by stamped and addressed 
envelope. 

The illustrations in Life are copyrighted ^ 
and are not to be reproduced. 

Prompt notification ihould be sent by sub^ 
scribers of any change of address. 




'^pHE gentlemen 
of science 
seemdis- 
po 8 e d 
n o wa - 
days to 
Ml carry 
the in- 
vestigation of "ttr family rec- 
ords to excess. They keep 
digging up all sorts of human docu- 
ments which they connect with us 
without asking leave. A man's skele- 
ton was dng out of a hillside in 
Kansas a few months ago, which was 
supposed to antedate the glacial peri- 
od, though sober second thought has 
since modernized it somewhat. But 
there was nothing mortifying to our 
pride about the Kansas man. His 
bones were creditable enough bones, 
as bones go. But more recently still 
there have been dug out of the sub- 
cellar of a cave in Croatia, Austria* 
I>arts of the skeletons of human crea- 
tures estimated to have lived more 
than two hundred thousand years ago. 
These last relics make somewhat for 
our dismay. The scientific gentlemen 
have deduced from them a man who 
had no forehead to speak of, and no 
chin ; who had a very long head, a flat 
face, enormous teeth in huge jaws, a 
long body, short legs and curved thigh 
bones. They think he could speak a 
little, that he walked with difficulty, 
and that he was a cannibal. They do 
not waste compliments on him, but 
they insist that he was a man. 

It seems a mistake to have too much 
ancestry, but at least these Croatian 
relics show that we have improved in 




TPROM the Croatian man to Mr. 
"*- Hewitt, for example, is a very 
long step. Nothing has been too good 
to say of Mr. Hewitt since he died, and 
it is comfortable to remember that in 
his case we did not wait until he died 
before expressing our sentiments about 
him. For a good while, by something 
like common consent, he had been re- 
garded as New York 's first citizen . He 
had opponents— a man as active in 
affairs as he is bound to have oppo- 
nents — but if he ever had enemies, he 
had outlived them, and he had pretty 
much outlived opposition too. He had 
come to be so generaUy recognized as a 
wise and devoted servant of the public, 
that his desires and opinions on any 
matter of concern to the people of New 
York had more influence than those of 
any other man. He was so tireless in 
well-doing, wise in counsel and effect- 
ive in action, that it was a great ad- 
vantage to this community to have 
him live his time so well and glorionsly 
out. He was successful in the com- 
mon, limited sense of the world, for he 
accumulated wealth, but we admired 
him not for what he acquired but for 
what he gave out, and not even for the 
money he gave, but for his lavish 
bestowal of himself — his time, his 
strength, his heart and his judgment — 
on matters that concerned the present 
happiness and future welfare of his 
fellow-countrymen. It is invaluable 
to any city or any country to have in 
it men of supreme ability who are 
aggressively good, and make it a part 
of their daily duty to work for right- 
eousness in time present, and for the 
betterment of generations to come. 
Such men leave the world better than 
they found it, and it is by their efforts 
that civilization moves on. 




works, is Governor Taf t of Ohio and 
the PhiUppines. His choice of an 
occupation, as we all know, is to be a 
Judge of the United States Supreme 
Court, and as we also know, the Presi- 
dent is more than ready, when the 
chance offers, to give him what he 
wants. But he went to Manila to help 
to do our work there, and though it 
is not particularly good for him to be 
there, and his health has suffered, the 
Filipinos feel that it is particularly good 
for them to have him there, and he has 
put his own hopes and wishes behind 
him again and will stay in the Philip- 
pines until he can better be spared than 
now. Manila protested so fervently 
when he proposed to come home that he 
relen ted. It indicates a hopeful pitch of 
intelligence in the Filipinos that they 
appreciate Governor Taf t, and his self- 
sacrificing preference of the duty at 
hand to other and moise congenial 
labors will be gratefully remembered 
by his fellow-countrymen. 




A NOTHER admirable citizen, whose 
"^^ light we trust may long shine to 
provoke his fellow-countrymen to good 



rp HE Flatiron building in New York 
-^ is extremely tall of its age, and 
extremely flat. Its renown has gone 
very much abroad. It advertises itself 
in the papers pictorially and in type, 
and also by its flirtations with the 
wind. The wind comes bolstering 
along on windy days, hits the Flatiron 
inattentively on its thin end; and next 
thing it has blown down a policeman 
and six ladies on Broadway, and has 
been hurled through a handful of plate 
glass windows across the street. The 
wind does not resent this treatment, 
but the ladies and the policemen think 
it rough, and one of the owners of plate 
glass, who is out of pocket by it, has 
brought suit against the Flatiron and 
wants damages. It is a novel and un- 
precedented suit which the owners of 
tall buildings will doubtless watch 
with interest if it ever comes to triaL 
What the Flatiron and the other cloud- 
capped edifices need is a wind storage 
apparatus, which, instead of turning 
aside brisk breezes to the detriment of 
the neighbors, will gather their va- 
grant energy and turn it to account in 
running elevators and making electric 
Ught. 



LIFE 



107 





SUGGESTIONS FOR ARTISTIC STREET SIGNS. 

FOR TBB OUIDAMCB OT TISITIlfe 8TRAKOSB8. 



A Valentine. 




y ONG, long ago, when the footsteps of 

men bjkI wi men first began to beat 

aloug the path of Ufe, the god of Love 

came down frum heaven to dwell with 

tbf m. It was before the 

^;^ dii\ 3 of archery, but Love 

could sing, and so, instead 

of vvounding human hearts 

bj shooting passion-tipped 

arrows into them, as 

he does nowadays, 

he lifted up his voice 

and sang, sang till 

the women looked 

up and held their 

breath to listen — till 

the men could not 

rest for the music 

throbbing in their 

hearts. 

Love's wonderful 



song has been vibrating along the ages, the most divine thing 
the human heart can know. When the wistful sweetness 
of the musio reaches a woman's ears it fills her heart with 
a gladness which has no like in heaven. Sometimes the 
song is faint and far away, as if its broken measures were 
being practised on wandering wind harps by untutored 
fingers. But where Love truly abides the song grows strong 
and stays, teaching happiness, goodness, patience ; making 
men willing to die for it — making them into the big- 
hearted, unselfish, gentle lovers—the Hims to whom all 
women pay loyal and tender homage, silently, in their 
hearts. 

When the shadows of life lengthen and one, grown 
weary, ventures out into the unknown, the deathless song < 
of Love seeks its way across the barrier of the eternal and 
pours its balm into severed hearts, soothing, healing, com- 
forting. ^. j^ ^r 



TDRIGGS: Bilkins didn't get along with that rich girl 
-"^ he married, did he ? 

Griggs : No. She went back to her family, and he went 
back to his creditors. 



108 



LIFE- 




V^n^ffisjr^ 




fTHE LATEST BOOKS 



TT was hardly to be expected that the second novel in Frank 
-*- Noma's trilogy of The Wheat should equal TJie Octopus, yet 
in spite of this realization The Pit is a dinappointment. In the Cali- 
fornia story, the impotence of the human atoms before the imper- 
sonal power of the Octopus, at first dimly discerned, became little 
by little omnievident and unescapable, till tragedy vras justified by 
its own grandeur. In The Pit, the current of the action is clogged 
and interrupted by petty detail, till the roar of the maelstrom of 
the Pit is drowned by the nearer bickerings of a mere love story. 
(Doubleday, Page and Company.) 

To the curiously inclined follower of fiction, a story of Rome by 
a native writer of acknowledged ability like 
Matilde Serao offers interesting opportunities 
of comparison with Marion Crawford, and 
with the twin bids for fame of Miss Corelli 
and Mr. Caine. The OonqueMt of Rome is in 
Mme. Serao's peculiar style, a broad effect 
produced by a series of minutely detailed 
pictures, and fully equals her Neapolitan 
stories in strength and interest. (Harper and 
Brothers. $1.60.) 

Mr. Crossland's The Unepeakdble Scot has 
roused the Highlander in one Angus McNeill, 
and a volume called The EgregiotLS English 
is the result. Poor Scotland at least deserved 
a champion with some sense of humor. To 
Mr. McNeill, however, the faults of the 
English are no joke, and he enumerates their 
failings with the ponderous exactitude of the 
hopelessly matter of fact. (G. P. Putnam's 
Sons.) 

An analysis of social and commercial condi- 
tions and an examination of their apparent ten- 
dencies, by W. Q. Ghent, appear under the title 
of Our Benevolent Feudalism, The volume is 
exceptionably readable, the author being 
neither a worshipper of statistics on the one 
hand, nor a weaver of theories on the other, 
nor yet without a realization of the grim 
humor of facts as they are. (The Macmillan 
Company. $1.25.) 

The Kiss of Glory is a three-hundred-page 
elaboration by Grace Duffie Boylan of the 
story of Joseph and his coat of many colors. 
It is chiefly noticeable for the emphasis it 
places, by contrast, upon the superb literary 
value of one of the most perfect short stories 
ever written. (Q. W. Dillingham Company.) 

Jesse Lynch Williams, in Xeto York 
Sketches, calls our attention to the city of to- 
day from the view-point of the observer and 
the artist, instead of to the city of the past 
from the view-point of the antiquary. The 
book gives us an inkling of how much we 
pass daily with unseeing eyes, (Charles Scrib- 
ner's Sons. $2.00.) J. B. KerfooL 



"I 



A MAN'S CONQUEST. 

WONDER," said Castleton to himself, as he made 
his preparations to leave town, *' just what is going 
to happen to me? Will she have me or not 7 " 

There is probably no more really happier period in a 
man*s life than when, having fallen desperately in love, 
he is on the eve of proposing, and is doubtful of the 
result. The very uncertainty of his fate appeals to that 
spirit of adventure which every true man carries about in 
his heart— a souvenir of past ages : and the constant alter- 
nation between delight and despair produces that thorough 
elimination of other considerations and that utter absorp- 
tion of mind and heart, which lift the victim into an epic 
world in which he is the colossal figure. 

Oastleton felt all this very keenly as he threw his things 
together to get ready for Mrs. Pinkerly's house party at 




SNAPSHOTS IN HADES. 

THB DEPARTMBMT WHBRS FCNI8HMBMT 19 XKTED OUT TO THE WORLO's NERVE-SHATTERING NOI8B 
MA KBRS— INCLUDING STREET-HAWKERS, AND THE INVENTOR OP THB AIR BRAKB U8BD ON THB NBW 
TORK ELEVATED RAILROAD. 



LIFE 



(09 




** CatUeton told a doub^fid good morning,*'' 

Green Gables in the Jersey Hills. Preooonpied as he had 
been for the last ten years of his life with large business 
interests, he had had little time before this to cultivate the 
fair sex. Beyond an occasional dance, or a theatre party, 
or a ride in the Peu-k, there had been no opportnnity for 
him to enlarge upon Miss Wintou*s acquaintance. But 
here was a chance that he could not miss, so he accepted 
Mrs. Pinkerly's invitation with much pleasure, knowing 
ihat Miss Winton was to be one of the party. And he 
determined that it should not be his fault if, at the end of 
a week, or as much sooner as was possible, he had not 
succeeded in winning her for himself. 
As luck would have it, when he stepped on the train at 



Jersey City, there were Miss Winton and her 
maid, occupying the chairs in the parlor car 
directly opposite to his own. 

** I am so glad you are to be one of us,** she 
said cordially. There was even that in the 
blight pressure of her hand, or the indefinite 
something in her voice, that seemed to indi- 
cate perhaps a keener joy at his presence than 
her conventional words conveyed. " The Pink- 
erly*s place, you know, is simply delightful. 
They have everything one can think of. Do 
you play games?" 

•• Why, I suppose so," said Castleton. •* I am 
ready for anything, you know.** 

'* Qood ! ** said Miss Winton, her eyes flash- 
ing with health and vital energy. •* We must 
start in early to-morrow morning, so that we 
shall not miss the early morning air. My 
maid knows one of the grooms, and 111 see 
that you get one of the best mounts — now, 
about what time shall we start? *' 

Castleton, living in his bachelor apartments, 
usually got up at eight, and after a bath and 
a hasty breakfast, was down at his office at a 
little after nine. But the ''early morning 
air** that Miss Winton extolled so highly 
api)ealed to him, especially as there was the 
certainty of their being alone, so he said : 
** Well, let*s say seven o'clock.** 
"Seven o'clock 1** echoed his companion. 
** Why, the sun is way up then.'* And she 
added with a touch of scorn: ** No, sir ! It mnst 
be promptly at six, or not at all. ** 

So at six sharp the next morning, Castleton 
said a doubtful good morning in the parte 
cochere. He had pulled himself out of his bed 
in the left wing half an hour before, in the 
cold gloom of an autumn morning, wondering 
how in the world he would manage that horse, 
for, if the truth be told, he had always been 
too busy to learn how to ride. 

And now here was the animal, led out by the 
compliant groom, plunging and rearing, while 
Miss Winton, on her own mount, waved enthusi- 
astically and impatiently to him. 
Castleton sprang on the saddle and grasped the reins. 
The horse, knowing beast that he was, lost no time, but 
rushed forward madly, and, almost before he knew it, 
Castleton was spinning through the air. In a moment the 
girl he loved was bending over him. 
"Are you hurt? ** she asked. 
He got up slowly. 

"Not a bit,'* he said faintly. "But if you will excuse 
me, I guess I won*t try that again. I*ve never had time 
enough to learn how to ride a horse.*' 

"Never mind," said Miss Winton. "Let's play golf I 
1*11 change my habit in a jiffy, and the links is only a mile 
away.*' 
So to the links they went. 
At the end of the fifteenth hole, Miss Winton was eight 



U^lcVfOitt^iJ 



no 



LIFE 




*'*^rf^ 



" LOTS LAUGHS AT BOLT0 AND BAB8." 

ap and three to play. Her score at the 
finish was ninety- three. Castleton's 
was one hundred and twenty -four. 

" You've played golf before, haven't 
you? " she asked sympathetically. 

** Never to any extent," replied Cas- 
tleton. " My time has been too much 
occupied." 

"Well," said his companion, "let's 
go in and get some breakfast. I'm 
awfully hungry. ' ' 

Her cheeks were red as roses. She 
seemed to walk on air. Castleton, on 
the contrary, was fagged out. He 
hadn't been used to this sort of thing. 
Nevertheless, for a man in love, he ate 
the breakfast of his life. 

«* What shall we do after breakfast? " 
said Miss Winton to the assembled 
guests. 

Golf, bowUng and ping-pong were 
in turn suggested. 

** Perhaps you play ping-pong," said 
Miss Winton to Castleton. His eye 
brightened. He had passed the ball 
several nights at the club. Tes, he 
played ping-pong. In a few moments 
more, surrounded by a crowd of idle 
spectators, they began their game. 

It did not take long to show Castle- 
ton that he was no match for his 
opponent. The score was six -two in 
her favor. He refused to play another 
set. Chagrined, angry with himself, 
he withdrew from the company, and 
walked off down the long lane of 



maples that led away from the entrance. 

*' This will never do ! " he said to himself. 
" I must win that girl some way, but how, 
when she is evidently determined to 
beat me at everything? It only makeii 
me love her more than ever, and yet 
how she must despise me by this time. 
But I'll get her yet, in spite of her 
superiority ! " 

He walked back. 

From out in the tennis court he 
heard the sound of voices and laughter, 
and thither he strolled. 

Miss Winton was playing doubles. 

" I'll be through in a few moments," 
she shouted as she saw him coming, 
" and then we'll play together." 

Castleton smiled back and nodded. 

*' It's evident," he said to himself, 
" that she has set her heart on my com- 
plete defeat. Well, it's something if 
she is even interested enough in me 
to do that." 

The game of tennis went the same 
way as the horseback riding, golf and 
ping-pong. Miss Winton won easily. 
Then came bowling, target practice, 
tether ball, and, in the evening, pool. 
It made no difference. This young 
and beautiful creature, full of life and 
spirits, superb in her excess of physical 
strength, had beaten him at every- 
thing. 

They met in the lonely hall at mid- 
night. 

**You look tired," she said. "Are 
you going upstairs? " 

** Not yet," he replied. 

He looked full into her eyes. Then 
he reached out and took her hand in his. 

"There is only one game you haven't 
beaten me at to-day," he said. "I 
shouldn't be able to sleep to-night 
until we had settled that also. I love 
you. Will you " 

Her head dropped on his shoulder. 

"Yes," she replied, "of course." 

Castleton didn't understand it even 
then. 

"I cannot believe it," he half whis- 
pered. ** Do you love me just as much 
as if I had beaten you all day instead 
of your beating me ? " 

She laughed softly. 

" More," she said. " Why, that's the 
way you won* me. Don't you know 
that in married life it is ever so much 
more important that a man should excel 
in worldly affairs, than that he should 
know how to play games ? " T, Af, 



A SOLPIER'S VALENTINE. 




"TT was only a square of paper lace 
-*- Where roses and hearts entwine, 
And beneath them a loving word or two : 
Only a valentine. 

A frivolous thing, in an envelope 
All covered with cooing doves, 

Forget-me-nots, and hearts, and darts, 
And little ecstatic loves. 

'Twas sent by a girl who kissed it once 
As she stood in the whirling snow, 

Where the lights from the corner store 
through the storm 
Sent out a hazy glow. 

But your Uncle Samuel must have 
guessed, 
No matter what else might wait, 
That letter must go, post-haste ! post- 
haste ! 
From here to the Golden Gate. 

For across the river and over the hills 
And the prairies, on it flew ; 



LIFE 



HI 




It dodged a wreck, and it entered storms, 
And once 'twas the last train through! 

Then forth it put to the Western sea, 
Where the speeding waves upcurled ; 

And the Cupids and love - lairds sailed 
away 
To the other side of the world. 



O wonderAil scrap of paper lace ! 

It went to a hospital bed 
Where a homesick soldier tossed and 
turned 

And would not be comforted ; 

And somehow the soldier felt that day 
Soft arms, whose pressure he knew, 



And home, and love, and .health, and hope 
* Thrilled him through and through. 

And he felt new love for our Uncle Sam 
Who had lent his trains and men 

And ships, that the whole wide world apart, 
Two hearts might meet again. 

Florence E. Pratt, 




Society. 

C0> lETT here has been enrlcbed this winter by 
^ tlie election to Congress of several wealthy 
jtmhg men who have wives possessed of social 
aspirations.— H(i#Ain^ton Letter. 

Society, everywhere, is a factor 
in our complex life, one way or 
another. Indianapolis society, for 
instance, affects literature, mostly ; 
Newport society, ethics. But 
Washington society is a political 
factor. 

The time has been that any man 
who was twenty-five years old 
and had lived in the United States 
four years was eligible to Con- 
gress. Now, of course, a man has 
moreover to be sufficiently well 

heeled to enable his womenfolks to go the pace set by 

Washington society. 

This does not mean that only rich men may enter Con- 

grress. There are almost always interests to which a member 

may sell himself for enough to put up the necessary front. 




Success. 

n^HE Durbar seems to have been quite a success. 

-^ In the first place, it exploded the popular notion that 

Kitchener would never smile again. 

Then Ourzon fairly outdid himself. Everybody says his 
superciliousness is riper and more massive than ever. 

Moreover, the Nizam of Hyderabad spent half a million 
dollars in Oriental fashion, thus demonstrating that the 
right man can shine socially even though he keeps his 
women in the background. 

Last, but not least, India's starving millions went back 
to their starving, after it was all over, with a distinctly 
clearer and more adequate conception of their unimpor- 
tance. 

TT^IRST PLUMBER : Well, my doctor just telephoned 
-^ me that something was wrong. 

Second Plumbsr : He has been calling on you regularly, 
hasn*t he? 

•• Yes, but now I'm going to return his visits." 



1V>r ARRIAGES are still made in heaven ; but subject to 
^-^ the import duty. 




«^frrf JU, list, »f £!/• fi tMUMn ^ Oft 



tr run KABWOT HAKif tw «y 



IIFE- 




ORES. 

VorS BBAIN8, DO IT WITH YOUR FEET. 



U4 



LIFE 



T-r-rT-XT^Tnr-7- 




The Season at Its Zenith Point. 

"'T'he Wizard of Oz was a very 
wicked old wiz, indeed, and made 
hirge bunches of trouble for little 
Vottie from Kansas and her amiable 
friends, The Scarecrow and The Tin- 
tnan. But this little band of adven- 
ftirers. carried into the mzard's do- 
minions by a Kansas cyclone, took 
their troubles not much to heart, 
and as the bulk of their ex- 
periences were of a most spectacu- 
lar nature, the whole thing makes 
an amusing entertainment for New 
York audiences. With it goes any 
amount of fun, some music not 
difficult of comprehension, and a 
^bewildering array of pretty and 
shapely girls in costumes elaborate 
in design but scant in material. 
The scenery is gorgeous and the 
lighting effects are utilized in a way going to show that there is no 
limit to the possibilities of electricity as a stage accessory. Mr. 
Julian Mitchell is responsible for the mounting of the piece and 
for the stage management and his results are calculated to dazzle 
and bewilder the spectator. 

"The Wizard of Oz" is the opening attraction at the new 
Majestic Theatre, which marks the extreme extension of New 
York's theatre district to the North and West. The theatre is 
handsome in design and decoration, and the roominess of the seats 
and aisles is a delightful departure from the stinginess of space 
which makes so many of our theatres places of torture for the 

average-sized citizen. 

« « • 

'lUf R. LOUIS MANN will be remembered gratefully as a very 
-^ -^ clever comedian of the German dialect school in a play 
where he was a subordinate character. His ** It is to Laugh " has 
become almost classic. But Mr. Louis Mann as the hero of a 
four-act play, involving his almost constant presence on the stage, 
is a very different matter. He is very funny, to be sure, as the 





German- American who,victimized by a practical joke, holds a com- 
mission from the Department of State of the State of New York 
as American Consul to a German principality, but it must be ad- 
mitted that his dialect and grimacing pall upon one after the fir^t 
hour or two. ** The Consul " condensed into a two-act comedy and 
preceded by a curtain-raiser, with Mr. Mann in a different line of 
work, would give him better opportunity and please his audiences 
more. 

• « • 

£RY unlike his former plays ia Captain 
Robert Marshall's '*The Unforeseen." 
From the light vein of " His Kxcellency, 
The Governor " and ** A Royal Family " it 
is a serious drop into a play which opens with 
a death in the first act, and whose whole atmos- 
phere is permeated with the dead gentleman's 
ghostly presence. Add to this a blind clergyman as a hero, and 
we have a sense of gloom which even the sunny vitality of Mr. 
Fritz Williams as a sixteen-year-old boy is not able to dispel. Nor 
can Captain Marshall be justified in his choice of material by the 
display of any great expertnest as a playwright. The principal 
interest centres in Margaret Anglin as the bride of the blind clergy- 
man, impersonated by Mr. Charles Richman. This lady, who has 
one of the customary I-am-going-away-from-here parts, seems to 
have gained better control over her facial expression than she bad 
last season, and in the emotional scenes shows very considerable 
power kept under good control. The other characters are subsidiary 
and well done. *' The Unforeseen '* is certainly not very blithe 
and merrv, and is not remarkably interesting. 

Metcalfff. 

LIFE'S CONFIDENTIAL GUIDE TO THE THEATRES. 

Academy qf ifwir.— "Florodora." Like the brook. 

Beiasco.—*'The Darling of the Gods.** Tragic story of Japanese life. 
A most artistic prodnotlon. 

BijOH.—Ur. Clyde Flicli's ''The Bird In the Cage.'' Not for the young 
person. 

Broadway.— >'The Sliver Slipper.'' Musical comedy, chiefly notable for 
Mr. Seabrooke's ''Mr. Dooley." 

Ca^m>.— " The Chinese Honeymoon." Musical comedy. Moderately 
amusing. 

CH/«rton.— Julia Marlowe in "The Cavalier." Play of the Rebellion. 
Interesting. 

/)a/y'«.— "The BUllonaire.'' Musical comedy. Commonplace and not 
very refined. 

Oarden.—Ux, Sothem in " If I Were King." Excellent play, well acted. 

Oarrick.—hJin\e Rnssell in '* Mice and Men." Notice later. 

Herald Square.— De Wolf Hopper in "Mr. Pickwick." Not Dickens, but 
musical comedy on rather unnsiial lines. 

KrUckerboeker.—''UT. Blue Beard." Notice later. 

ifanAa^an.— "Mary of Magdala." Mrs. Flske as heroine of New Testa- 
ment story. 

AVm; York.—** When Johnny Comes Marching Home. " Tuneful fun. 

Princess.— honlB Mann in " The Consul." See above. 

Savov.-Ur, Fitch's "The Girl with the Green Eyes." with Mrs. Blood- 
good as the star. Amusing. 

TlctoHa.— "The Eternal City'* and Viola Allen. Fairly Interesting 
draoia of life in modem Rome. 

Waliack^s.—** The Sultan of Suln." Bright and tuneful musical comedy. 

Weber and FUlfis^s.—Burlewrae and vaudeville. Diverting. Persons 
wishing good seats can secure them from near-by speculators. 




SOME OP TBI PRXTTT GIRLS IN "THB WIZABO OP OZ. 



LIFE 



us 




IT DRAWS THB LIOHTNIIfG* 



Depressing. 

'T'HE story that the stringent new 
regulations as to what officers of 
the army shall wear on their feet were 
oooasioned by a certain captain having 
appeared in full uniform with buff 
shoes makes the earth seem pretty 
thin under our feet. What profits it a 
people to gain the whole world, if 
they can't have faith in their army? 



A nation does not live by unex- 
ampled prosperity alone. 

One almost wishes that mankind had 
never emerged from the condition of 
the cave-dweller, who knew nothing 
either of buff shoes or world-politics. 

Music. 

'T'HAT Mr. Bagby's musical mornings 
•^ have been appreciated was shown by 
the size and close attention of his audience. 



Although composed chiefly of the fair sex, 
which loves to hear itself talk, and is seldom 
given to applause, the artists must have 
been gratified by the intelligent interest 
taken in their achievements. 

The song recital is a severe test, and 
Mesdames Adams, Schumann-Heink and 
Gadski, and M. Gilibert again proved their 
artistic merit. As for Mme. Sembrich, her 
ability in this and other musical fields is 
well known. 



I 



U6 

A Personal Case. 

' T^IS versifier's fortune fine 
■^ To have on hand both '"thine" and 

"mine" 
In constant rhyme with ** valentine." 

But, dearest, I could strive to see 
The rhyme so changed that it might be 
Your Valentine could rhyme with Me, 
James March Leonard, 

Consecrated. 

* ' r DOUBT the power of any university, " 

-^ says John Bascom, "to turn money 
that has been made at the expense of the 
community to the welfare of the com- 
munity." 

This is to intimate either that the proto- 
plasmic cell cannot be artificially produced, 
no matter how much money is spent for 
biological laboratories, or how big salaries 
are paid the professors in charge of these, or 
else that common people wouldn^t be much 
benefited by being enabled to live forever. 

Dr. Bascom is a teacher of moral philoso- 
phy in a college whose endowment is dis- 
tinctly less than twenty millions. Naturally 
he is more or less out of touch with the most 
advanced thought. 

As for the masses, they have no misgiv- 
ings. With them it is no longer the narrow 
old doctrine, *'A penny saved is a penny 
earned," but the gander, worthier truth, " A 
penny per gallon more for oil is a penny 
consecrated." 



LIFE 



OUGGESTED inscription for the 
pedestal of the monument pre- 
" sented by the Emperor of Grermany to 
the people of the United States, by the 
Grace of God free and independent. 



This Kino, 

Frbderick of Prussia. 

Had Considerable Skill in War. 

This Exhausts His Praises. 

He Submitted, in Manhood, to Be Ganed 

By His Ruffian of a Father. 

He Was an Unkind Husband 

To a Submissive Wife. 

His First act of Sovereigntt 

Was 

To Rob His Neighbor, 

That Mbiohbor Beino a Woman. 

The Reason He Gave for This Robbbbt 

Was 

That This Woman Was Timid and 

Helpless. 

But She Proved to be Neithbr, 

And Gave Him the Fight of His Life. 

His Morals Were Unspeakably Bad. 

He Scoffed at Religion. 

His Government Was Worthy op 

The Dark Ages. 

He Was the Embodiment 

Of Brute Force. 

He Trampled Upon His Own Laws. 

He Despised Democracy, 

And Said 

That America Would Soon Return to 

•♦The Good Old Way of Monarchy ! " 

americans i 

Honor This King ! 



/ 



.THEN WHAT rHE:\ 



^N THE G00&\ 

Old Summer: 





WINTER AND SUMMER. 



A Queen of Hearts. 

(VALENTINE.) 

Xir OW many hearts with rapture beat 
-*— *- And long to have and hold you, 

Sweet! 
It is disquieting to know- 
That, of the many beating so, 
When love and fate their web have spun. 
There shall be joy for only one! 

It must be difficult to tell 
Just wisely how to choose and well, — 
There are so many in the game, 
Their tender stories all the same : 
Bewildering the task must be, — 
So many locks, and but one key ! 

O, maiden of my dream and song, 
Bound whom these hopeful lovers throng, . 
When you select one, have a care. 
For my heart is among them there : 
Choose then to-day, dear Valentine, 
And may the happy heart be mine ! 

Felix Carmen. 

The Nude. 

"TP Adam and Eve had not sinned, 
-^ nobody would be wearing clothes. 
That is entirely clear. 

But who shall affirm that the W. C. 
T. U. would be anywise more tolerant 
of the nude? 

It may be that the fall of man was a 
clever scheme to avoid trouble. 



LIFE 



117 




**BOBBIX, DID TOU KNOW I WAS 80INO TO MARRT TOUR SISTER?" 
"oh, T«8. WHVN did you find it OUTt'* 



LIFE 





PLUTOCRAT'S CHANT. 
Tell me not in mournful numbers 

Trusts are but an empty dream, 
And the merger dead that slumbers 

And things are not what they seem. 
Trusts are real, trusts are earnest. 

Wealth unbounded is their goal, 
Dust thou art, to dust retumest 

Was not spoken of King Coal. 

— B. Prieth, in The Whim. 

While President Roosevelt's boys are diverting 
Washington society with their doings. President 
Hadley's children are as entertainingly contributing 
to the gayety of New Haven and the Yale campus. 
Some of the stories about Arthur T. Hadley, Jr. 
(and these are the ones most relished by the stu- 
dents), have led him to be punningly referred to as 
the minus scion of a noble house. 

One of them relates that be recently took pos- 
session of the bathroom, and patriotically repro- 
duced the battle of Santiago in the tub with minia- 
ture warships of bis own make. After a time his 
mother ordered him out, as she wished to take a 
bath. Young Hadley, however, imheedingly contin- 
ued to loop the loop. 

Opportunely his father arrived and commanded 



^fl'if'^MH^ 



the boy through the keyhole to abdicate. The boy 
said nothing, but was too wise to oppose his father. 
Soon the water was heard running from the tub. 
the key turned in the lock, and out marched Master 
Arthur. Not a word did he say until he bad opened 
the front door and provided an avenue of escape. 
Then his voice arose defiantly: 

"Well." he shouted. **I came out for you, but 
I've got the plus to the tub with me, and the Presi- 
dent of Yale College himself couldn't take a bath 
now!" — New York Times. 

The story is told of a young man in West Gard- 
ner who called one night a few weeks ago upon a 
young lady who lived a considerable distance from 
his home. It was raining hard that night and when 
the young man started to take his leave at about 
11 o'clock the mother of the young lady upon whom 
be had been calling told him that he had better 
remain there that night and occupy the spare cham- 
ber. He told them that ' he thought perhaps he 
would, but upon their return to the front room after 
a few minutes' absence they found that their vis- 
itor had gone. Supposing that he had changed his 
mind and decided to spend the night at home, they 
locked the doors and started to retire, when there 
came a knock at the door. Upon opening it they 



found the young man with a little bundle under his 
arm. He explained that he bad Just been horn* 
after bis night clothing. — Gardner (Mast.) New: 

Two old pals met on the street. 

"I saw you in the liquor men's parade Tues- 
day," one of them said. 

"Oh, yes." 

"Now, you tell me about It Who .were tli06« 
fellows in front on horses?" 

"Those? Why, those were the wholesalers." 

"Well, who were those fellows in carriages?" 

"Those fellows in plug hats, smoking the bis. 
black cigars?" , 

"Yes." 

"They were the distillers and brewers." 

"Who were those fellows walking there with the 
white plug hats, white coats and gold-headed 
canes?" 

"They were the retailers." 

"Who were those fellows that brought up th« 
rear?" 

"Fellows with cauliflower noses and fringe on 
their pants — the crowd I was with?" 

"Yes." 

"Oh, they were the consumers." — The Dela- 
ioarean. 



Life is for sale by all Newsdealers in Great Britain. Tbe international News 
Ck>mpftn7, Bream's Building, Cbancery Lane, London, E. C, England, AaENTS. 



Established 1823. 

WILSON 
WHISKEY 

That's All I 



THB WILSON DI8TII-LINO CO.. 
Baltimore. Md. 



Dyspepsia 

and other 4tonk<wh troubles 

quickly relieved and in most cases 
surely ou-ed by the use of 

^lycozone 

This scientific germicide is ab^o- 
tutety harmte^'S: it subdues the 
inflammation of the mucous mem- 
brane of the stomach, and by re- 
moving the cause, effects a cure. 
Used and recommended by leading phy- 
sicians. Take no substitute and see that 
each bottle bears my signature. Trial size, 
•1.00, at druggists or by mail, from 



D«pt. 9., 60 Prince St. 

Send for Booklet, 



New York. 



Printed Satin Foulard. 

Shantung, Habutai, and India Silks. 
NOVELTIES IN 

Rich Evening Silks. 

Ombree Moire Loutsine, New CrSpe 

Mircttc, 

Rustique, and Ninon. 

White Silks and Satins 

for 

Wedding Gowns. 

Novelties for Bridesmaids' Dresses. 

Black Silks, Velvets. 



NEW YORK. 



Two Elements of 

5ocial Life are 

Health and Hospitality. 

Hunter 
Baltimore Rye 

contributes to both. 

Wm. Lakahak a Son, Baltimore, Md. 




BLACK, STARR ewi^d 
FR.OST, 

438 FIFTH AVE.. NEW YORK. 

PRECIOUS 

STONES. 



WE 
PAY 
POST- 
AGE. 



All you have gueeeed about 
life insurance may be wrong. 
If you wish to know the truth, 
send for "How and Why," 
^ issued by the 

Penn Mutual Lifk, 

921-3-5 Chestnut Street, 

Philadelphia. 



mSS^ 



Prompt lUlM for 

Coughs, Colds, 
Jlstbma, 
Bromlfitis, 
BoarsiuessixiSore Zbrom»t 



OYAL L LEGR;^"D 



THE LATEST SUCCESS OF THE 

ORIZA-PERFUMERY rOrflAd Pviv Pa^h IfiOO^ 



LIFE- 



No better Turkish Cigarette 
can be ma.de 



Ergyptian 
Deities 





Master thinks Im a dandy 
at mixing cochfailsV 



u 



(lub 
(ocrtails 

Y^fll I ^^^ do it 



just as well 



Pavr over lumps of ice, strain OLnd serve 
SEVEN KINDS BEWAPE OF IMITATIONS 

G. F, HEUBLEIN ® BRO, 

HARTFORD JVEW VORK LONDON 



MINEUaL WATEU^ Kolrl 1u Araerb.a lu^luv 

CARBONIC, ARTIFICJAL VICHY, 
SELTERS, CLUB SODA, Etc, 

are aUit (lut up In b^jUk";* fur out of topn 
delivery H Bod cad Im lient ^^y fn4i:hT or 
eitjft^s?! to any part of itj*j I aktM wmtes. 

"""'" CARLH.SCHULTZ 

Tel. 142 Miv] i!"!!'!! Si|. .(;» m | i r>i A v i-. , N. Y. 



One taste convinces 

KORN-KRISP 

Leads them all 



Pure Delight found in The EDISON 

PHONOGRAPH 

Use Edt^on ^ 

Mom J died rTecords+ 
Make Records of 



The Plionogriipli ia the 
m*ly mui hjtietJiiitficH'^ not 
(rcruk-h nor acrewh. giving 
ftnrt? musWi tone* ntid 
ck-ur Bjh'ecli, with grt;at 
Volume Mid sweftness. 

Tb« rhoruigPujOi is the 
mm-hine with vfhU^h ^uc* 
cewsful rcfords t*in be 
ninde nt Fiomc, iilliprdin^ 
Unt'ndiHi^ nmuscment iind 
iribtruftinti. 

NATIONAL PHONOGRAPH CO* 
Oranse, N« J. 

Kiw VotiJt. S3 Cbainti*™ Strppt ; Cniciofl, Ui 
Wabftfllj A^erjiifl I San pHANrteoo. 933 Market 
S»tr«t!t ^ KrfciiM, Hii Rempu-rt i^lnt George;!, 
Aniwerp^ B«lEFluni. 



JAHAICA 




5p%*'m'2WEST INDIES 

An Mi^AX HTxtT In whtf'b To ftpend a wliirer'9 vtidLllou 
and AvoUi liliate e^irftiieti of the nortliero ciluuiK^, 

UNITED FRUIT CO/S 
STEAMSHIP LINES 

operate wee lE It trt? I Treen BOSTOK and PllTLATIErH- 

I'^JIA unil JAMAICA^ 4tle QJAgulllceur lwm-8e:rcw 

I. ,*?. jy^lL Sieiiniiibtpa : 
Ad ml rat Dtw^y Admiral FampAon 

Admir*! Schley Admiral Furrairut 

Siilt^iifr« Weeklf from Botton tn4 rjitladelphl* 

FHr*^ fnr rnimd rrlp. In cl ml toff stiicomoni ncctmimcj- 

ijatlons^ auii nit'Hi^, |t:» , one wuy, f ja, 

Spml for our b(?»oHfnl bonkUt wHffhpr yflii tOatem- 
|fUte llu' trlfi cir nut 

UNITED FRUIT COMPANY 



RierS, Nnrth WKi 
PHI LA, 



Lonw Wbnrf, 
B05T0N 



Full InfomLAtlun and TickelB of I41OCHJ Ajj^ent 



^ 



^SERVED 

lOUNlAINS 
CAFES 




ARMOUR 



lORVEAKSTOMACBS 

'^ ^AITEASANT AND 

AGSIXABIiE BEiVEKAGlL 
fiwCOMB^NY, CHICAGO 



^ SOID IN ' 
BOTTLES 



LIFE 



^NTEMPor 




SETTLED OUT OF COURT. 
A rogue met a pretty youDg Mrs., 
A widow, and stole a few Krs. ; 

And the lady, though she was astounded. 
Said she'd wave prosecution 
If he'd make restitution, 

So the felony soon was compounded. 

— Philadelphia Press. 
For convenience, really superior hotel service 
for select patronage, and climate, there is nothing 
for New Yorkers quite like Lakewood. New Jersey. 
Laurel House. 
Laurel-in-the-Pinbs. 

"I guess we would be amused if we could see 
ourselves as others see us." 

"But think how amused others would be if they 
could see us as we see ourselves." — Philadelphia 
Press. 

CALIFORNIA IN LESS THAN THREE DAYS 
VIA Chicago and North-Western, Union Pacific, and 
Southern Pacific Railways from Chicago. The elec- 
tric-lighted "Overland Limited" provides the best 
of everything. Diversity of routes ; finest scenery. 
Compartment observation cars, bufFet-library cars 
(with barber and bath) : dining cars. All agents 
sell tickets via this route. 

When Lord High Admiral, the Duke of Clar- 
ence, afterward William the Fourth of England, 
went down to Portsmouth to inspect the naval es- 
tablishment, the first person he met was his Jolly 
old messmate and friend. Captain Jack Towers. 
The prince took him by the hand and laugh inrly 
said: "Why, Jack, my boy, they tell me you are 
the greatest blackguard in all Portsmouth!" "Ob." 
quoth Towers, "I hope your royal highness has not 
come down here to deprive me of my character." — 
Argonaut. 

If you put it off, you won't go. Old Point Com- 
fort. Va., with its history — its Fort — its gentle 
Southern atmosphere is waiting to welcome you. A 
postal to the Chamberlin brings a booklet. 

In a rural Justice court in Georgia, says a 
Southern newspaper, an old negro whose testimony 
had been questioned by the lawyer delivered this 
defense of his character : 

"Jedge, I'm a good man. I been a-livin' roun' 
heah ten yeahs. I ain't neber been lynched, en de 
only boss I ever stole frowed me en bruk bofe my 
lalgs." — Youth's Companion.. 

As a health-giver, no tonic made equals Abbott's, the 
Original Angostura Bitters. Druggists and grocers. 

THE HOTEL OF 2003. 

Clerk : Michael, are you about through moving 
those trunks? 

Porter : Yis, sor ; in a few minutes. 

"Well, when you've finished, stretch the lifenet 
over the front pavement. Mrs. Hibawl has Just 
telephoned from the top floor that her husband has 
fallen out of the window." — Smart Set. 



IWMLN YOU CO "TOCOUKT" YOU'K 
BLS7 ADVOCATE IS 



WHITMAN'S 



I Chocolates axid 
Confections 
>t[>|(i t^vpr>Tk ht^rw. 
WHITMAN'S 
InttantaneouB 
Chocolate. 

fwlth t»oiiliii? nillk. 






MORTON TRUST COMPANY 

38 Nassau Street, New York 
Capital, - $2,000,000 

Sarplns and Undivided Fronts, $5»815»982 

OFFICERS: 
LEVI P. MORTON. President 

THOMAS P. RYAN, Vice.PrMld«at 

JAMES K. C0RBIERE,2d Vice-Preat. 
H. M. FRANCIS. Secrstarq 

G. L. WILMBRDING. Asst. Swrretar^ 

H. B. BERRY, Trust Offiesr 

EXECUTIVE COMMITTEE: 
Levi P. Morion Joseph C. Hendriz 

Thomas F. Ryan James N. Jarvie 

Edward J. Uerwind Georire Poster Peabody 
O. G. Hayen Jacob H. Scbiff 

William C. Whitney 



WASSERMANN BROTHERS 

STOCK BROKERS 

40 EXCHANGE PUCE, NEW YORK 

Members of New York Stock Exchaofe 



BRANCH OFFICES: 

733 Fifth ATenue (Plaza Bank). 

Windsor Arcade, oomer 46th St. and 5th Ave. 

Astor Court (Waldorf-Astoria Hotel). 

Imperial Hotel. 

5 West S6th St., opposite Martin's Restaurant. 

Fifth Avenne Hotel. 




If It h«s been your habit to drink 

foreign SlIo yo\i owe It to yourself 

to try 

Evans 

Ale 

Just to see how America has 
virrested the supremacy for 
brewing from the old ^irorld 



Apply to any dealer. 



Accept no substitute 
use only tho genuine 

MURRAY A 
LANMAN^S 
FLORiDA 
WATER 

For the Handkerchief, 
Dressing-table and Bath. 



Bordeaux 
Wines 

CLOSSMANN & CO. 

Bordeaux, F'rance, 
Founded 1770. 



Chateau 
IMalleret 

Grown on the Estate of 
Mr. Paul Clossmann. 



: MAL' 



HBf' 






Olher Clossmann 
brands constanlly on 
hand. 

Booklet of our wines 
sent upon request. 

C. H. ARNOLD & CO., 

AGENTS FOR li. S.. 

27 South William St., 

NEW YORK. 



LIFE 



Rabst beer 

is diwm pure 

Brewed from carefully selected barley and hops — never permitted to 
leave the brewery until properly aged. 




THE 



EQUITABLE 

nCNRV B tlVDE. fouiidcr 




JWJllEXANDER 

PRESrOEIfT 



J^ 



mk' 



JMMYDt 

Vlt[ PRCSIDENT 



Washington and 
Lincoln 

defended and protected their country 
wJiilc they lived. 

The Father of a family should defend and 
protect his family, not only while he lives 
hut after he dies. 

This can best he accomplished by life 
Assurance. An Endowment policy in the 
Equitable will protect your family in the 
event of your death, and will provide for 
your own future if you live. 
For full information fill out coupon below. 



Vneancle^ la evt-tt Btme foriaeoorcliApacrfr aTi4 fnrruy tfr act m.m 
reprpBF&t&llTP». ApplT to fiaittt E, Tarbf 11, 'Id Ticr-Pi-cH. 



THE EQUITABLE LIKE ASSURA\CE SOCIETY 

OP THE UNITED STATES 

120 R ROADWAY, NEW YORK Dopi. No. 27 

it isiiufd tit. ,.,„,,,,,,,,.. H , .. y^^rt ofa^Q. 

Narot. , 

Address. , 



M^mmr "V/\#«lr /^^^M-f t»ClPl 



W««CI 



«/i r^«^4f<il C^<i^:/^n CENTER OP THE CIT 



LIFE 




■THE LAST STAND" 
/V FTER exhaustive tests the United States Government has put 
Smith & Wesson Revolvers in the hands of its soldiers. Soldier 
and civilian alike meet dangerous needs with the confidence that no 
other revolver but a Smith & Wesson gives. 

For Smoking Rootn or Den we have published a limited number 
of copies in exact reproduction of Frederic Remington's stirnnK 
picture, "THE LAST STAND," on heavy plate paper. 14 x 15 
inches in size, ready for framing. We will send, prepaid, a copy to 
any address for ten cents in silver, togeiher with small reproduc- 
tions of the pictures which have appeared previously. In the 
March Pearson^s, Collier's, Munsev, Country Life and Town and 
Country we will reproduce *' HOSTILES," an Indian picture by 
Dan Smith. 



All Smith & Wesson 
Revolvers have this 
monogram trade-mark 
stamped on the frame. 
None others are genuine. 




SMITH & 

42 STOCKBRIDGE STREET 



WESSON 

SPRINGFIELD, MASS. 



DOMINION LINE toEUROPE 




Boston to |}y£8nitown and Livarpool 

Fu,*^ t T ^*' i ti -.■'I ■ r-.' w S \ t=a m t-rn 
!*,S. CommciiiwriiltiK 1 3,0410 ton 
!«. S. fVeW tCnicUnd, ]l,|OatoliPt 

«i. <^. ]Tl«Tli>ti, P ll^63atotiPi 
MEDITERRANEAM SERVICE 

^% lsrt«r*<t<^ao)^ :^ftp]ea and Alex « 
andriA, 8^Eiit for Illu^imk-d Ij^ 

DOMtNIOii WINE 

!/j I i-'irlHini Street, Cmo4ivv 
llj3 i<n>ailway, - New Yohk. 




Rare Old Violins 

pLKfitMtand finest oolleetf on on thisoontiawit. 
com j -rising the oomplete celebrated Hawley 
wlt»>jjtion^ Fine eatalosue ifreer ooBtainia* 
WfiH-ei mile labels tnoolorsand Biographieeof 
AiUiie noted makers. List and particolara of 
Itolo Instmmenta from tfiO to tlOjOOO. Monthly 
P^rmentM may be arranged, violins aent oa 
■VP4ITI days examination. Formal carl" 
Df ffunalnenewi with each Instrument. 

LYON&HEALY. 




Pure 

Habana 

Segars— 

Always 

Mild 

And 

Aromatic 



MaLde in the old-faLshioned honest 
wav of Pure HabaLnaL Tobacco 
delightfully blended 



Look for the Bull 
Dog on ea.ch Box 



J«hn W. MerriaLin &. Co. 

The R.ovcroft Sega^r Shop, which 
is "At the Sign of the Bull Dog" 
NEW YORK 



U.n^R^Uf RVR 



\ STRAIGHT 



Vi^HKSKRV 



H. B. KIRK 6l CO., 



lUDmm/ «/#%nB/' 



LIhb 




Write for 

illustrated 

booklet A. A. free. 

JOSEPH DIXON CRUCIBLE CO., 
JerMj City, N. J. 



This 

Gibson 

Head 

and pictures by Reming- 
ton, Smcdley, Casuigne, 
Hutt, and other well- 
known artists are in a 
beautiful little book, tell- 
o.»«^^/<w.«^ '"ff of a novel monthly 

S!C?'i?i/7 competition for more 

' than $3,000 in prizes. 

The contest is open to everybody, without 
cost. Send 4 cents in stamps for the book to 

Th* U«ii»t Mottth, 418 Wctt I3tli St-ffawYorll 




Kttdienlltensls 

HAVINC THIS 

TitADE MARK 




JUUC SAFE. 



NO POISON 

Has Ever Been Found in 
the Enamel of 

Agate Nickd- 

Stcel Ware. 
The BLUE LABEL 

Protected by Decision of 
United States Court, pasted 
on every piece, 

PROVES IT. 

If gabstitutefl are offered, 
write us. New Booklet ^Yee. 
Agate Nickel-Steel Ware in HOld 
by the leading^ Department 
and Houwfumishins Stores. 

L9 lance & Grosjean Mfg. Co.* 
New York, Boston, Chicago. 



THE CITY OF NEW YORK, 

DEPARTMENT OF TAXES AXU Ai?SESSMENTS, 

MAIN OFFICE. BOROLGH OF MANHATTAN, 

NO. 280 BROADWAY, STEWART BUILDING, 

January 12. Ili03. 
NOTICE IS HEREBY GIVEN, AS REQUIRED 
by the Greater New York Charter, that the books 
called "The Annual Record of the Asseseed Valuation 
of Real and Personal Estate of the Boroughs of Man- 
hattan. The Bronx. Brooklyn, Queens and Richmond, 
comprising The City of New York," will be open for 
exatnination and correction on the second Monday of 
January, and will remain open uotii the 
1ST DAY OF APRIL, 19U3. 
During^ the time that the books are open to public 
Inspection, application may be made by any person 
or corporation claiming to be aggrieved by the as- 
sessed valuation of real or personal estate to have the 
eame corrected. 

In the Borough of Manhattan, at the main office of 
the Department of Taxes and Assessments, No. 280 
Broadway. 

In the Borough of The Bronx, at the office of the 
Department, Municipal Building, One Hundred and 
Sc-ven,ty-«eventh Street and Third Avenue. 

In the Borough of Brooklyn, at the office of the De- 
partment. Municipal Building. 

In the Borough of Queens, at the office of the De- 
partment. Hackett Building, Jackson Avenue and 
Fifth Street. Long Island City. 

In the Borough of Richmond, at the office of the 
Department, Masonic Building, Stapleton. 

Corporations In all the Boroughs must make appli- 
cation only at the main office in the Borough of Man- 
hattan. 

Applications in relation to the asse.ssed valuation of 
pon»onal estate must be made by the per.son asse^Sf:'d 
at the office of the Department In the Borough where 
such person resides, and in the case of a non-resident 
carrying on business In The City of New York, at 
the ofHce of the Department of the Borough where such 
place of business is located between the hours of 10 
A. M. and 2 P. M., except on Saturday, when all ap- 
plications must be made between lo A, M. and 12 
noon. JAMES L. WELI.S. President. 

WILLIAM F. COGSWELL. 
GEORGE J. GILLESPIE, 
SAMUEL STRASBOURGER. 
RUFI'S I*. SCOTT. 
Commissioners of Taxes and Assessments. 



HARTFORD ""''''■ 
DUNLOP "?JSfe 
HARTFORD rI*!.'.!^. 

1 ll\ll^& are universally 




Costs more to produce 

than 8Lny other 

choonpeLgne in the market 



Veuve Qicquot 



What^s the inference? 




U h iklkious, Fruity vid pure, with 
a Fofty-year record u flnt on the list 
«f Dry Chvnpflgncj. Ho spArkUnj 
wine in us* is its juperfor 




oarss Of Tur J- ku *katt r-f% Hrw wfv*M- 



Llt^t 



Febrnary 6. 19a3. 





NOW KING 
OF HAVANA CIGARS 

Made irv Hoveirva airvd Tekirvpck 




/^ L^- 



VOLUME XLl. 



NEW YORK, FEBRUARY 12, 1903. 

Entered at the New Tork Post omce as Second-Olaas Mall Matter. 
Copjrlglit, 1002, by Lifb Pitblishiko Gompakt. 



NUMBER 1059. 




NOCTURNE— ANDANTE. 

D. Cupid. Op. 1001. 



UhCtll THC *Cr OF IB&1* ^ 

VAN NORDEN 
TRUST COMPANY 

751 FIFTH AVENUE.NEAR 58'-" STREET 

NEW YORK 

CHARTERED MARCH 21, 

CAPITAL AND SURPLUS, 

DEPOSITS, 

TOTAL RBSOURCES, 



LIFE 



, 1902 

- sa,coo,ooo 

B,COO,000 
7,000,000 



^.D«ra M WAN NORDEN P^t^^u^^J ARTHUR KINQ WOOD. See v A-o TRfAi- 

WARNER M, VAN NOROtHt kpesibe'^i ROBINSON, Aj*t TRtAftUPEii 

WILLIAM F. HAVEMEYER. Vict-P«E4<PCNT WILLIAM W. ROBi^ibM". ***» 

MORTON C NfCHOLS.ViC£-P»E6tDtNT JAMES B. H*IU. Jn , 

-rp*LJ3»i !-•■=- _ _ _ TnUHT OrrttCB 

EDWARD a AVERy, - - ' ' 



WAmUKm VAM NOflOiN 

NewYoric ^„ 

WARMmn M. VAM NORDCM 

Prea*defit ,„ 

WILLIAM F- HAVEWIIYEfl 

Kew Yorfe 

JOHN «• FLAGLIR 

JAMCB TALCOTT 

Hon' OORMLIU* M. RH«« 

Ei'Secref&r? of tHe Interior. P S. 

fcsiitik 

HENRY F. SHOtWAltRR 
ChttlrmAR Esecnit^e Committee 

RBNitAMlM PfiRKINS 



it 



RICHARD L. tDWARDS 

PraaUlfiiit Natlotttti Bftnk oC ^Sorto 

JOHN H* WASHBURN 

Prtjftldt'iiT li^mn-^ lir^i]iATi'eGnm|i*"y 
JONATHAN O. CU«R«V 

WVaiMni jiAilrfJttcl Ctniip*iij 
ERNftT THALMANN ^ 

iJuleQCJDrjr, TtlflUnanti * CciuniftUJ 
CHARLCt W. MORSE 

MAHLON^'d. THATCHIR 

HiHRY H. OOOK 

N I? w ¥ tIl 

** vlio-lrZi'dflUt Americiiii SjiTingii Umut 
ARTHUR A. FOWLER 



IBZ-* A.B. 



2 Z 
GOLD ME DAIS 



LONDON 1861 
PHIlMtlPHtA I6?6 
VIEHKA 1873 
CHICAGO 1893 
LONDON 1386 
UFFALO 1901 
KRIS 1867 
1878 1900 



m 



llfTlRS 

The Worlds Best Tonic 
Imported from TrMadsw/ 



UnnvaUed appe tiling tonic and siomach 
corrective, recommended by physicians A 
half a winc^ijlassin sweetened wat^r.sod^ 
water or lemonade makes a dehgHtful 
heahh^Rivmg drink (or ladies and chil- 
dren, A few dashes in pure liquor, sherry 
or champagne, the epicure's delight- Re. 
(lise imitations and cheap Sbbsiuaies. 
None genuine esccept Dr, Siegert S, On 
the market 7° years. Made only by 

DR. J. a B. SIEGERT fit SONS. 

A a Crotcrt and BrugghU. 

J W. WUPPERMANN, Sole Agent, 

NEW YORK, N. Y. 



Lundborgs 

perfi 



mes 




CLOVERA 

GOLDEN 

Jasmine >i 



goyauly, 
\ Violet 

e^DEW. 



L 




Tfte 
Perfumes 

of 
Quality 

Lundborg s Productions have been for 
over half a century the standard of su- 
perior quality, delicacy and refinement. 
Ladd & Coffin, New York— London- 




Price, «i3,500 

A Terfecf Mcichine. 'Buitt ^Better. 
LaaK^ -Better and Is Better 

It leads in all that is desirable. For ease, afety. 

enauranc© and speed it has no equal ji .P ^ 

WHITE FOB CATALOG I 

List «f AE'O'Ji** » <«ii«-ii 



NEW TOiEK— Efl*"«Ti 

ni I LA U KLPni A- Wni 

BO&T<'N-ir 11 Sbattnck 
Columbn* Atc 



fi»n Bcn}l*^*rf« „^ _._ i. ^ 

L03 A?jGKtt:*'N^mfln W- CkmX^ 



8. WftiuSt, , ^. „ 
Miirl*! 1 Sit, 



PACKARD MOTOR CAR. CO>. Warren. O^ 



LIFE 



^:^t-' 



[J-v) tOLluC;,. I 



127 



Fc :, l''Vr'' '•■ 




THS GAME OF '* FOLLOW THE LEADER/* 



A Refutation. 
S a report seems to be tour- 
ing the country to the 
effect that Mr. Gibson has 
departed this Life, and is 
mixed np with The Ladies^ 
Home Journal, we hasten to 
correct a statement reflect- 
ing so injuriously upon a 
close personal friend of this 
journal. Mr. Gibson has 
no agreement with The 
Ladies* Home Journal, His 
work will appear only in 
Collier* a Weekly and Life. 

'pHE Fountain of Youth lies in 
the smiling eyes of our chil- 
dren. 




A Prophecy. 

TUTAVING commented with character- 
-*— ■- istic amiability in his poem, ** The 
Rowers," upon England's alliance with Grer- 
many, Mr. Rudyard Kipling may be ex- 
pected at almost any moment now to express 
his views on the reference of the Venezuela 
matter to arbitration. It is uo violation of 
confidence or copyright to suggest that these 
will take form somewhat as follows : 

The Kiss op the Snake. 
Ye have forced a way through the jungle. 

Ye have hewed a path through the wood : 
With bluster and blunder and bungle 

Have ye wrought for ill or good I 
Ye have hammered flat the mountains, 

Fen have ye drained and lake — 
Ye are feared, ye boast. 
Nor of Man nor Ghost — 

Beware the Caress of the Snake I 



oTf.,C.iU/- 



Desert and forest and mountain 

Have ye handled for right or wrong — 
Have moved the river and fountain 

To ways they shall follow long : 
With hammer and sword and ploughshare 
Ye have made Mother Earth to ache : 
Ye have riven her breast 
In your great Unrest — 
But beware the Fang of the Snake ! 

I have piped, ye have danced : the worl 
trembled 
At the sound of your moving feet : 
And Nations and Thrones assembled 

Raise eager hands to entreat : 
Hear their imploring — but hearken I 
Ye will never make mistake. 
No aid will ye need 
If ye but take heed — 
Beware of the Kiss of the Snake ! 

H. G. Butler. 



128 



LIFE 




»» H'hiie there is Life there's Hope.' 

VOL. XLI. FEB. 12, 1903. No. 1069 

19 Wk8T Thirty-First St., Xiw Yore. 




Published ereiT Thareday. $&00 a year In ad 
▼aooe. Postage to foreign countries in the Postal 
Union, |l.(ti a year extra. t«lnii1e current copies. 
10 cents. Back numbers, after tnree months from 
date of publication. 25 cents. 

No contribution will be returned unless 
accompanied by stamped and addressed 
envelope. 

The illustrations in L.IFE. ate copyrighted ^ 
and are not to be reproduced. 

Prompt notification should be sent by sub- 
scribers of any change of address. 



\ GUIN- 

DO*S peti- 
tlrmtoCon- 
;:re8 8 to 
J t^ n d the 
^^■Cp^ people of the 
Philippines a 
^ Imii^r^^d million 

dollaxei for th«3 develop- 
ment and improvement of agriculture 
is not approved even by the best 
friends of the Filipinos in this country, 
but its spirit is respected, and it has 
had some effect in calling increased 
attention to the distress which now 
prevails in the islands as a result of 
war, cholera, cattle diseases and other 
calamities. A large proportion of the 
Filipinos are near starvation and un- 
questionably need help. It lies with 
Congress to help them by an appro- 
priation of money, an abatement of the 
tariff in their favor, and by giving 
them a sound currency. Governor 
Taf t wants three million dollars for 
their immediate relief. He ought 
to have it, and have it promptly, and 
surely Congress will also concede the 
reduction of tariff and the currency 
legislation which the Administration 
calls for. The Filipinos are out of our 
sight ; there is danger that they will 
be out of mind too. Their present 
distresses are the immediate results of 
American efforts to improve their con- 
dition. There is a fair prospect that 
those efforts will eventually do some 
good, but meanwhile the islanders 
need prompt attention and timely help. 
It augurs well of the improved rela- 



tions between the Filipino leaders and 
our representatives in the islands that 
Aguinaldo*s petition should have been 
forwarded to Congress. It is a reason- 
able inference from that that the natu- 
ral leaders of the Filipinos are no 
longer regarded as enemies of the 
United States. 




pOLONEL ARTHUR LYNCH, 
^-^ British subject of Irish birth, 
late commander of a regiment on th& 
Boer side in the South African war, 
has been tried for high treason, found 
guilty, and sentenced to death. But 
our British brethren are not going to 
behead or even to hang him. His sen- 
tence has been modified to life im- 
prisonment, and probably in due time 
he will be let out of jail. That seems 
a highly convenient disposition of his 
case, both for him and for the British 
Government. Executions for high trea- 
son are very much out of date. They 
have to be public, and a pubUc execu- 
tion would scandalize contemporary 
England. Besides, there was a strong 
element of opera bouffe about Lynch 's 
treason. He was elected to Parliament 
by an Irish constituency while he was 
in South Africa, and came back to 
Europe, but lingered a good while in 
Paris before he could make up his 
mind whether to risk himself on Eng- 
lish soil. When he did set foot in 
England he was arrested. By trying 
and condemning him the British Gov- 
ernment has recorded its disapproval 
of subjects who take arms against the 
Crown. By commuting his sentence it 
has avoided making a hero of him, 
and eluded the vengeance of Father T. 
Dempsey of St. Louis, who was ready 
to dynamite the British Empire if 
Lynch was executed. 



<^^ 




teaching accompanies it. Some of his 
predecessors held a different opinion, 
but Mr. Skinner argnes the legality of 
his position, and also says that by 
order of the Board of Education in 
New York selections from the Bible 
have been read daily in the schools of 
that godly city for many years without 
appeal or protest or evidence of dis- 
satisfaction. It is to be hoped that 
both the Legislature and the public 
will rest easy under Mr. Skinner's re- 
port. The Bible is still the most 
interesting and important of books to 
the Western world, and is highly re- 
* spected by good judges of literature. 



■VTR. CHARLES SKINNER, Super- 
-^ -^ inteudent of PubUc Instruction 
in New York State, has reported to 
the Legislature that he does not con- 
sider that the State Constitution is 
violated by reading the Bible in the 
public schools, and that he will not 
stop such reading where no sectarian 




n^HERE is a disposition to amend 
football by abolishing ** mass- 
plays." A mass-play is one in which 
five or six players stand one behind 
another and try to force a way 
through the opposing squad. They 
are criticised as being dangerous to the 
players and uninteresting to the spec- 
tators. They can be avoided by a very 
simple modification of the rules. Any- 
thing that can be done to increase the 
gratification of spectators at football 
games ought to be done. They spend 
their time and money freely, and en- 
dure cold, rain and acute physical 
discomfort for the benefit and en- 
couragement of comparatively few 
players. If the abolition of mass-plays 
will make the game livelier and give 
better sport, abolish them. 




/CONGRESSMAN FITZGERALD, 
^^ of New York, proposes a law for- 
bidding the use for advertising pur- 
poses by any person engaged in trade 
of the likeness of any living person 
whose consent has noc been first ob- 
tained. It would be a good law, and 
Congress might i>ossibly find warrant 
for passing it in the power given it 
to regulate commerce. But the com- 
merce clause ill the Constitution needs 
watching. If it keeps on stretching. 
Congress will soon declare that mar- 
riage is a bargain, and pass laws regu- 
lating divorce, and compelling hus- 
bands to be in at ten o'clock. 



LIFE 



)2» 






Valentine Verses, 



THE POINT OF VIEW, 



^^. Y THOITGHT ilmt valetitinea were 

^^^^^^^^ I imt of dut* [ 

Y/aJ^ Til at juit^er bearii And fondlf 

V-TOi And all (be symhols of r crIIow 

Were evpry where declared bebiud tlie Um4?«* 
And IbtMi I »(iiw & maUl laugh i^ut tti g^ee 

Atid hide hff mb^rive, iiiid a youth, elttte. 
Grow red at Iuh ; ajul kuexv—alfl* Jor rut; — 

irs not St Viilentiiie ivho'«i fiut of dale! 

Jh/jV^ Wiiiior Tmnpkins, 

TO GAINT V/XLENTINE, 

(The Preabyttfr or Bisihop, bo culletl beeAaae of 
his atiiiablt? c;hBraci*r, was hebeadiid at Rome In 
the reigo of the Eiiit>eror <'laudm»0 

/~\Hi Saint, beheaded by the Roman folk, 
^^ Thy fale was liarah and steru, 

But bartlly vrorfie than mine ! 
For I» oil* I do burn 
With lovt\ auJ hive'« no Joke; 

Bt. Valtfuliue I 

Now, really ^ Saint, a fellow-feeling ought 
To make you kind to me : 

Jiiai like your blessed Hajntahij* I atn caught : 
Tve lost my head, you scti ! 

hiciLard Btirlan. 

A Kind-Hearted Ruler. 

TTTE copy the following comment from our bright 

^ ^ Newark neighbor, The Whim : 

Turn Kaiser's Sporting Record. 

Bbrun, October 28.— It la annonnced In the i>aperB here that the 
Kaiser has completed bis tblrtieth year as a banter and sportsman. 
An elaborate list Is given of bis tblrty years' " bag.'* It seems tbat his 
Jiajesty has killed an aggregate of 47,443 animals. Of these 18,891 
were pheasants, 27.881 bares, 2,507 wild pigs, 1,627 rabbits, over 4,50u 
<leer of all sorts, mcludlng 8 reindeer and 7 elk, 121 chamois, several 
tiondreds of varlons birds, as gronse, bastards, docks, etc., 1 marten. 1 
whale and 1 pike. The list closes with " 473 varioas other animals,'* 
AS to which no details are given, and about which some reasonable 
curiosity Is felt.— JLontfon ChfvnicU. 

How proud the Kaiser must feel when he ponders the havoc 
he has wrought among the harmless denizens of his forests. 
How his manly bosom must swell when he thinks of the fear- 
less way in which he bowled over the unsuspecting animals. 
Safe in his cover, unseen by his victims, he merely pressed the 
trigger and sent the death-dealing missile towards the living 
target. 



VAL&I4T1NE TO SIBYLtX 

PIQUANT, petit* ; 
JCoserHrott^*^; 
All that Is awect,-— 

That ia btr way. 

Bmile like a ray j 
Eye-1— hqvr thty ehine 3 

Sibylbt Bay-- 
Will you Iwmine? 
Voice, such a treat I^ 

Tlini»h-$ongiii U^f 
When falls the fleet 

Dunk of the day. 

TrtMses where ijiay 
Gold gleatua divine ; 

Sibylla, say— * 

Will you be miue? 
Hctir rut* repeat - 

Ijovc's fuundclay I — 
Every heart -Heat 

Yours ia for aye ] 

Hark, while 1 ptayl " 

List, lest T pine I 

Sibylla, »ay — 
Will 70U be mine? 

xNVor. 
Whtsjjer mc *'yea/* 

Fair Viilentiue I — 
Sibyila» say 

Wh^% youTl b« tpine f 

Ciinton SooUctrd. 




^W4lY>aKVlt^ 

I ♦ • I 



~T~T seems that tight lacing tends to make a woman's 
-L nose red. That is to say, things don't look quite so 
daxk for posterity as they did. 



JSxplorer: can tou tell xh where i can pikd the north pole? 
Native: sat, touno teller, you are the fifth man who has asked he 

THAT QUESTION. WHAT's THE JOKE, ANTUOW f 



130 



LIFE 




Qn the Crast, Wilbelmlne von Hlllem's *'Ro- 
mftDce of tbe Puslon Play at Oberammer- 
gaa/* can only be described as a case of nisbing 
In where tbe angels tbemseWes wonld besltate. 
Tbe tbeme bas tremendoas emotional and dra- 
matlc possibUiaes, but offers Insurmountable 
obstacles to good taste. Zola would bave at- 
tempted It, and failed. A Milton or a Shakespeare 
might have succeeded, but wonld never have 
attempted It. It is fair to say, however, that it the 
tM>ok is sensational, and, in places, fairly sacri- 
legious, this is apparently tbe result of the au- 
thor's limitations and not of her intentions. 
(Drexel Biddle, Philadelphia. $l.fiO.) 

Mrs. Alice Morse Earle, whose accurate and 
charming writings upon old-time ways liave bad 
so wide a popularity, bas surpassed her own 
record in her new volume, Sun Dials and Roset 
of YesUrday. It represents a vast amount of 
delving and study, and gives their results in 
most attractive form. Tbe history, ssthetics 
and mathematics of the dial are all included, and 
the book is finely illustrated. (The MacmUlan 
Company. $2.50.) 

Mans inhumanity to bis wife is treated from 
the widely separated standpoints of twentieth 
century realism and mid- Victorian sentimentality 
in two curren t stories. The Life of a Woman , by 
R. V. lUsley, is at once so graphic and so com- 
monplace as to be merely depressing. The 
woman never wholly enlists our sympathy, and 
the man does not even win tbe compliment of 
our contempt. (Herbert S. Stone and Company, 
Chicago.) 

Mrs. Elizabeth Stuart Phelps, on tbe other 
hand, in Acery, calls in a vision and a semi- 
miracle to reduce tbe delinquent to remorse and 
ring down the curtain upon a happy stage and a 
tearful audience. Unfortunately, the sclflsti hus- 
bands, who alone might be benefited by either 
book, will never read them. (Houghton, Mifflin 
and Company. $1.00.) 

Napoleon Jackson is one of Ruth McEnery 
Stuart's clever sketches of Southern darkles. 
Napoleon is a gentleman of color and of elegant 
leisure, whose mother had *' marked him for 
rest,'' and tbe story hinges upon the vain etTorts 
of " the quality " to establish a proper division of 
labor betw^n him and his cheerfully industrious 
wife. The little book is amusing, with a touch of 
very genuine sentiment (The (Jentnry Company. 

$1.00.) 

7%« Weaving qf Webs is a story of secret serv- 
ice in and about Richmond under General 
McClellan, in which Dame Fortune is kept 
busy controlling' tbe alternating current of 
her smiles and frowns. After playing seesaw 
with the hero and the villain through many chap- 
ters she finally confirms the eternal laws of 
poeUc Justice. Tbe l>ook is by Francis W. van 
Praag. (R. F. Fenno and Company. $l.fiO.) 

More of James Wbltcomb Riley's verses about 
youngsters are always welcome. His new vol- 
ume. The Book of Joyous Children, is daintily 
illustrated, and holds some delightful bits of real 
Riley. (Charles Scribner's Sons. $1.50.) 

J. n. Ktrfoot. 




*H0W DID TOUB UIDTSHIP PIND TBI JKWILS WHICH I CAUSID TO BX OONVlT£D TO TOUf *' 
"with TBI AID OF AH XNLABGINO GLASS, TOUR XXCBLLEKCT." 



LIFE 



J3J 



Time's Valentine. 




' 'y WAS St. Valentine's Day, and Father 

-^ Time 
Said, " I think I'll scribble a bit o' rhyme, 
To send to the sweetest maid on earth." 
And the old fellow chuckled in roguish 

mirth. 
He reached for his inkhom and quill, then 

said, 
As he absently nodded hh wise old head, 
" But what maiden is gentle and sweet and 

fine 
Enough to be my Valentine 7 
There's a musical girl in Kalamazoo, — 
But I hear she beats Time, so she won't do ; 
There's a fair New York girl, proud and calm. 
But they say she kills Time without a 

qualm I 
A pretty clubwoman I saw one day, 
But * I won't have Time,' I heard her say. 
For one of those summer girls I yearn ; 
But they declare they 'have Time to bum.' 
There are lovely girls in a Southern clime, 
But they sweetly admit that they waste 

Time. 




Cupid: it's bast SNOUUH to XAKK VATCHIS in this COUMTBT, WBXBB it 19 so DARK 
TOD can't SSS WHAT.TOU ABl SPOONING WITH. 



While the bustling woman, with manners 

curt, 
Takes Time by the forelock, and that does 

hurt. 
On the Boston maiden I make no claim. 
To improve Time seems to be her aim. 
And I heard an old spinster contriving a 

plan, 
Say, * ril try to get Time as soon as I can.' 
So none of these whom I've mentioned yet 
A Valentine from Time shall get. 
But I've in mind a maiden who, 
When a fond lover came to woo, 
Just blushed and hung down her pretty 

head. 
And * Give me Time I ' was all she said. 
By Cupid, that's the maid for me ! 
To her my Valentine shall be." 

Oirotyn Wells. 

This Country of Ours. 

'yHB Grovernment of the United 
States comprises three depart- 
ments, viz.: Wall Street, the W. C. 
T. U., and the Beet Sugar Industry. 

The Beet Sugar Interests fix the 
tariff. 

The W. C. T. U. determines what 
pictures shall hang in the White 
House. 

Wall Street, with such clerical help 
as Congress may render, does the 
rest. 



SOME DESIGNS FOR BOOK PLATES. 
1. 



ex tlBRl$ 




msellmae 



132 



LIFE 




An Interrupted Courtship. 

HERO aud a Heroine, who hud 
caped f niDi the pag^^e of our 
best magaziTi^s, met at 
a conn try huuse m an 
afternoon- tea environmeiit. 
The Heroine belonged to 
that claBB of charHcterB 
whose home snrronndings are thtus dei>(Mibefl : 
•• 'f calkilate I'd better fly -ronud an* etir Tiji 
a mess o' crulls an' some johntiy^cnk^ fer 
Paw's sapper/ said Mirandy Stebbiiis, peericj? 
through the narrow-paned kitebeu wludow at 
the leaden New England 6k> ." 

The Hero, on the other band, wat* of thtit 
aristocracy of stories which bejrin with a para- 
graph of scenery, and are followed by a ptr- 
sonal descriptive bit, written with style : "A 
face, remote yet not resentful, abBtracted yet 
not capricionsly, morbidly intiiffereot ui thwt 
it defined an appreciation of a 8nbtlety wholly 
RUggestive, bnt nevertheless arriTiujsr »t plaiii- 
tiveness in the cadences <rf a toIc^ whose 
echoes betrayed an irref- 
ragable and nnimpassioned 
peccability." 

Had this maid and this 
man met in a cheap maga- 
zine, the usual melodra- 
matic denouement might 
have been expected ; bnt 
they were the brain children 
of those who had painfully 
acquired a vocabulary, and 
had spent the rest of their 
time in hauling up buckets 
from the wells of '* English 
undefiled," thus entirely 
failing to observe life's interesting 
pageant. 

Now the daughter of Mirandy and 
Hiram Stebbins was doomed to " eddi- 
cation." She had profited by her op- 
portunities, and was about to take up 
literature, having almost completed 
** The Love Letters of a Yassar Girl, 
by One Who Could Not Possibly Have 
Received Any. ** Ck)nsequently she knew 
enough to avail herself of the privi- 
leges of the tea-table ; so she politely 
inquired: "Will you take lemon, 
cream, or rum in your tea ? " 

** I don't quite know," replied the 
young man. " I just escaped from the 
magazine this afternoon. If I am the 
child of a New England spinster,"— 
the girl blushed and looked down,— 
**my conscience wouldn't allow me to 
take rum or lemon. It would savor of and beautiful. 




The Elephant : x>oh't shoot, obaicdpa boab I tou mat kill m«. 

The Leisure Class. 



cosmopolitan frivolity. But if I be- 
long to the American ' society tale,' 
whose authors usually write with the 
naive snobbery of 'gentlemen's gen- 
tlemen,' I shall be obliged to take 
rum." 

The girl gazed at him perplexedly a 
moment, and then put down her cup. 

*' Look," she cried, **here come 
Ethel Newcome and David Copper- 
field, Jane Eyre and Tristram Shandy, 
Mrs. Proudie and Tom Jones, Charlie 
O'Malley and Maggie Tulliver. 
They're real. What's the use of our 
fooling and pretending that we can 
drink tea? We are only ink and 
paper." Mrs.WiUon Woodrow. 



/CHILDREN are wise: they see 
^-^ every day something wonderful 



n^HE leisure class is the fruitage of ma- 
^ terial prosperity. It comprises two 
species, namely, the smart set and the 
hoboes. 

These species differ (genus plus differentia 
giving us the scholastic definition of species) 
both accidentally and essentially ; acci- 
dentally, in that the smart set always have 
money to bum ; essentially, in that hoboes 
sometimes have a sense of humor. 

The smart set are the successes, the 
hoboes the failures, of our civilization. Our 
civilization is remarkable in that its suc- 
ccHses and its failures are equally good for 
nothing. 

However, we are not money-mad ; merely 
money-drunken ; in the morning, doubtless, 
we shall be sober. 



IVyTAN has to work for what 
^-^ lower animals get free. 



ttm 



•LIFE 



J33 




The Judgment of Bishop 
Valentine. 

^n€ tvm^ ^ Vduthe of faire degree 
Dldde loolie up0n a niayile* Mb 
me* 
She was as cov« as anye floiv>t 
She $to1c hvs hart« In thaHe savme 

Jllle vaifilie be to Cove didde calle, 

Ve Mifide Sodde bolp bym notte atte 

alle. 
Co Bisbop Ualentifie tbetine bies 
Ve Voutbe, ye Damosel likewyse, 
JIfide eacb 'gan toll bys tayle of diiefe* 
€acb sayd ye otber was ye tbieto« 
^^ Sounds r' cried ye Sainto, ^^ tbto brawie 

must cease* 
Til binde ye botbe to keepe ye peace/' 
Olbereat ye twain in nowyse foatb» 
^^Pray tben vpytb one bond binde us 

botbe/' 
Coude laugbed ye Sainte, ^^Perdil Xis 

doner' 
JInd made ye Voutbe and mayden one« 

Lady, anent this suit of mine 

In search of. precedents, I waded 
Through ancient lore, and found this fine 

Old Judgment, in a parchment faded. 
If 70U will ponder the last line 

And be by wise example aided, 
We, too, will make Saint Valentme 

Our Judge, and— compromise, as they did. 
Oliver Herford, 

"VrODD : Old man, I really believe you have stopped your 
■^^ worrying. What brought about the change ? 

Todd (cheerfully) : My troubles are more real than they 
used to be. 

T IPE is a school, with board and lodging extra. 




Peace. 

T F, as we are now advised they will be, the festivities 
"^ incident to the entertainment of Lord Roberts by the 
Ancient and Honorable Artillery of Boston have been pro- 
longed sufficiently to enable these fine troops to wear all, or 
nearly all, their different uniforms, bonds of amity are 
likely to be cemented. 

Of course it is the demonstration of our preparedness for 
war that makes for x>eace. Minding our own business is 
obsolete. 



TpmST MODERN PLAYWRIGHT ; Aren't you always 
-^ nervous on the first night ? 

Second Modern Playwright : Never I I am too care- 
ful where I get my ideas. 



IFE- 



^S^^^^^^ 



i^'^- ■.'••^•^'^v - - 




^fSl^L. 



}36 



LIFE 




t \ % t 9 



DRAMA 





Two Good Ones. 

n^HE li«ftt Uiid scbemes o* mice and men 
^ GaDf? Aft a-j^ley ; 
And ieavo ih naught bnt grief and pain 
For promised joy. 

BuniB's lines furnish the title to Mrs. 
Jityley *8 pretty play, the schemes being those 
of u ^rell-intentioned gentleman to 
briug up a young girl in the way she 
^hc^uld go with a view to making 
her his wife. The schemes 
go **a-gley" because the 
. feminine young person, as 
X^^ always, seems to have, in 
matters of the heart, an innate tendency to go in directly the 
opposite direction to that intended for her. This is a little bit 
rough on Mark Embury, who had arranged the plan, and he is 
seen at the last curtain taking up his life in loneliness instead of in 
double-harness as he had fondly anticipated. The sympathy, how- 
ever, has all along been with the young lovers, so his disappointment 
is borne philosophically by the audience. The whole atmosphere of 
* * Mice and Men " is refreshing. It is not a great play, but it is clean 
and wholesome ; it tells its little romance simply and directly, and 
yet does not drop into the slough of mushy sentimentality. Mrs. 
Ryley has not aimed unreasonably high and she has hit her target 
full in the centre. The success of her play goes to contradict the 
belief entertained very generally in the theatrical world that the 
taste of the whole American public has become so debauched that 
only what is tawdry or meretricious appeals to it. The character 
of the audiences attracted by this play shows that there is a saving 
remnant of theatre-goers who will not patronize the ordinary 
''show" of commerce, but who will give substantial support to 
decent plays if they are well presented. 

Not only is the play attractive, but it is a joy indeed to find three 
artists like Annie Russell, Mrs. Gilbert and Mr. John Mason play- 
ing together. Annie Russell is the star, and in Peggy^ the ward of 
Mark Emhwy, who is to become his wife, she has a part exactly 
fitted to her sweet and gentle personality. It is enough to say that 
Mrs. Gilbert appears as the housekeeper of Embury — to praise her 
would be almost to paint the lily. Mr. John Mason's part is a 
reposeful one, and he plays it with a polished dignity only too rare 
among our present-day actors. There are other good actors, too, 
notably Messrs. Glendinning, Johnson and Butler, and in its 
entirety the cast is a better one than has been brought together for 
some time. 

*' Mice and Men " can be witnessed without loss of self-respect, 
either on the grounds of intelligence or morals, and is a most 
enjoyable entertainment. 

* * • 

^^OT only the children but grown-ups as well will find in " The 
-'-^ Little Princess," performed afternoons at the Criterion, a 
most delightful and surprising combination of play and players. 
It is distinctly a play of childhood, but in it Mrs. Burnett 



has mingled the humorous and pathetic, the former predom- 
inating, in a way to joy the heart of anyone who has ever 
takei; the slightest interest in children, and in the better side 
of children's ways. Those who have children of their own 
should take them to this performance as a lesson in those good 
manners to which in this country perhaps too little attention is 
paid. Besides, Mrs. Burnett tells a very interesting little story 
which closely holds the attention of both child and adult. Miss 
Millie James, who is Sarah, the child heroine of the piece, gives 
a really remarkable performance, and it is difficult to believe that 
she is in fact a young woman instead of the charming child she so 
sweetly and artistically portrays. The others in the cast, most of 
them real children, have been wonderfully well trained, and the 
results in the way of acting are indeed noteworthy. Some of 
them put their elders to the blush. The audiences, composed 
mostly of children who follow the story with absorbed interest and 
unconcealed delight, are an entertainment in themselves. There 
is nothing jaded or &/asd about these spectators and it must be a 
joy to play to them. 

It is worth the while of even a very busy business man to take 
part of an afternoon off to see '* The Little Princess." It will do 
him good in more ways than one. It is not to be inferred from 
this that the play is anything in the nature of a Sunday-school 
lesson. It simply goes to increase the blessed love of children. 

• « • - 

R. BLUEBEARD " is a combination of hand- 
some spectacular effects and costuming 
imported second-hand from London, and com- 
monplace humor of the Tenderloin type made 
to order in this country. It contains a few 
laughs, notably those caused by the grotesque 
antics of a two-man stage elephant. There is 
also introduced a cleverly acrobatic small 
ballet of imported English girls. As to the rest of the show, 
if every spectator should be equipped with a chestnut-bell, and 
ring it on due provocation, not much would be heard of this 
classic performance. 

" Mr. Bluebeard " is the kind of entertainment perfectly adapted 
to people who have table d'hoted at filty cents, and tilled up on 
table d'hote wine. It is a cheap show for cheap people and — they 
like it. Metcalfe. 

LIFE'S CONFIDENTIAL GUIDE TO THE THEATRES. 

Academy qf J/t/jric— "Florodora/' Second edition of the original music- 
al comedy. 

Bela*eo.—**1Xi% Darling of the Gods.*' Sonabre but interesting and 
wonderfully well staffed story of Japanese life. 

Bijou.— Ux, Clyde Fitch's "The Bird in the Cage/' More immoral than 
clever. 

^roadiray.— "The Silver Slipper." Musical comedy of the regulation 
kind and only average interest. 

6\wino.— " The Chinese Honeymoon." Musical comedy. Fairly tuneful 
and fanny. 

OriterUm.—iuWt^ Marlowe in '*The Cavalier." Military drama Inter- 
esting story well acted. Afternoons, "The Little Princess." See above. 

/><i/y*«.— "The Billionaire.** Mnsical comedy. Tenderloiny. 

Garden.— Ml. Sotheni m "If I Were King." Poetic drama. Worih 
seeing. 

{rarHrik.— Annie Russell in " Mice and Men." See above. 

Herald Square.— ''Mr. Plckwiclc " in musical guise. Funny and melo- 
dious. 

Knickerbocker.— "Mr. Bluebeard." See above. 

Manhattan.—'* Mary of Magdala." Interesting version of the scriptural 
story. Well staged. 

Xew York.- haAi week of *'When Johnny Comes Marching Home" 
Musical comedy with tunes of the period of the Rebellion. Worm bearing. 

Princess.— LonXfi Mann in *'The Consul." Too much of Loals Mann. 

Savoy.— Ur. Pitches "The Girl with the Green Eyes." lotemarional 
comedy. Diveriing. 

Vict/>ria.—lAat week of "The Eternal City." Fairly interesting drama- 
tization of Hall Calne's novel. 

Wallack^s.—*' The Saltan of Snlu." Musical comedy, with book by 
George Ade. Funny and melodious. 

Weber and i^/cf«>.— Barlesqne and vaudeville. Accommodating specu- 
lators have good seats for sale at advanced prices. 




•LIFE 



137 




The Man Who Didn't Fail. 

(a mOHTlIABB or THB FUTURE.) 

Pittsburg the air- 
ship was stalled for 
L hour by the soot. 
McPlnnger, 
the owner, was 
beside himself. 
••To-morrow," he fumed, •* is my 
wedding-day. I must be in Lon- 
don by four o'clock sure, or forfeit 
my reputation.*' 

Several local society leaders came 
forward with offers of a soot plough. 
"No,** said McPlunger, ••these 
modern appliances are no good. I 
shall use, after all, the old-fashioned 
hot-air blower." 

Ajs they rose finally through the 
soot, they were greeted by cheers 
from eighteen million throats. New 
York was next. How to get by was 
the question. 

In half an hour they sighted the 
offices of the Metropolitan Street 
BailwAy rising to a height of several 
miles. As they came near they saw 
people being clubbed by the con- 
ductors. 

Several thousand children flew in 
their way, but McPlunger ran 
through them mercilessly. 

•• London or Bust! " was his motto. 
" We might go South," suggested 
his private secretary. • • Somewhere 
along the Atlantic coast there ought 
to be a break in these office buildings 
enough to let us through.*' 
His master frowned. 
*• What do you think the Building 
Trust has been doing — sleeping 
nights ? " he asked satirically. 

•' Not on your life 1 Our only 
hope is the coast of Greenland." 

They passed Boston in fifteen min- 
ntes. The secretary shivered. Adver- 
tisements of new religions were sky- 
high on the horizon. 

«« What's that we've struck?" he 
cried, as the machine plunged and 
swayed from side to side. 

<« Those are Parker House rolls," 
said McPlunger. *• Well, I'll be hanged, 
if there isn't a row of office buildings 
ten miles high right up the coast of 
Greenland. No air is deep enough to 
let US get over them." 

«' Let's go back to 'Frisco," said the 
private secretary. •* You were married 




▲ VALKNTIHE. 



only last week. Won't you wait an- 
other week before you are married 
again?" 

*'NoI" roared McPlunger, ••I 
can't. Besides, the girl expects 
it." 

••Well," said the private secretary, 
getting out his parachute, •• I'll resign 
my job right here. I'm going to work 
my way back to 'Frisco, if it takes all 
day." 

So saying, he dropped off at Halifax. 

McPlunger sat for a long time over 
the Provinces in deep thought. 

•• There's only one way out of it," 



' I'll do it, if it costs 



he muttered, 
me my life." 

Thereupon he called up the London 
Flying Machine Trust by wireless. 

•' Have a machine on the ocean side 
of New York, with all possible speed," 
he aired, •' and wait for me." 

•• "Very good, sir," was the reply. 

♦' And now," said McPlunger, " back 
to the Harlem River. It's the only 
route I know." 



At three-thirty the next afternoon 
he was ready for the ceremony, his 



138 



LIFE 



pale, emaciated and braised form, however, showing the 
terrible effects of his ordeal. 

** Darling," said his latest bride, ** how did you get 
here? How did you get over those American office 
buildings?" 

** I didn't," said McPlunger faintly. *• I left my machine 
on the other side, and for yonr sake I faced death in a 
thousand forms, and walked through the streets of New 
York I " Tom Ma^stm, 

Wonders. 

A WAGON loaded with hard coal came up the street. 
-^^ The excitement was intense. 

Suddenly a trolley car stopped and let a man off precisely 
where he wanted to get off. 

Many pinched themselves to see if they were awake. 

In the midst of it all, the policeman whose duty it was 
to be there was there, and treated everybody courteously. 

Persons with weak hearts began to fall dead. 

But now an automobile, going eighty miles an hour, 
tore through the dense mass of people. Wonders had 
ceased ; the spell was broken ; the world wagged on in the 
old way. 

Beware of Love. 

T T is reported that the vivisectors are getting up a Society 
~^ for the Prevention of Kindness to Animals. 

We don't believe it. These slanderous reports will travel. 
Besides, you know, the vivisector loves animals. We had 
an uncle who loved lamb. 

Society. 

n^HE BULLTFAT INKUMS have gone South. 
-^- will remain there until they come back, 
gets all her potatoes of Tiffany. 

There is a rumor floating about that Miss Flissie Heep, 
second daughter of Mr. and Mrs. Toppother Heep, wore a 
hat last Thursday that did not quite please her. We sent 
a reporter to the house, and he was officially informed that 
the rumor, while based on fact, was somewhat exaggerated. 
The reporters from the New 
York IHines and the New 
York Tribune were already 
on the doorstep when our 
representative arrived. 

Mrs. Hardy Snubber, last 
Monday, was walking from 
her costly equipage to the 
doorway of an expensive 
jeweler, when she noticed a 
slippery place upon the side- 
walk. Had she not seen it 
in time she might have 
fallen. She has about seven 
millions in her own right. 

At a dinner given by Mrs. 
Innittor Dedd in her palatial 
mansion on Madison Avenue 
recently, Mrs. Shaidee Ppast 
began to laugh while drink- 
ing champagne, and she al- 
most choked. 



They 
Mrs. Inkum 




HUXFTT DUVPTT BAT ON A WALL, 

HUXPTT DUXFTT BAD A GRlAT FALL ; 

ALL THE KINOES BOR9B8 AND ALL TBS KlNO's MBN 

COULDN*T PUT BUMPTT DUMPTT TOGKTHKR AGAIN. 

Books. 

T INCOLN read only a few books, and not always the 
-^ best books, and was highly educated. 

We read a great many books, and very good books, and 
are much less highly educated, as a rule. 

The business of books is to set a man to thinking. After 
he has been set to thinking, what he needs most of all is 
time to think. 





WHAT 18 HUMS WITHOUT A COOK? 



;.-e.^. 



LIFE 



J3? 




DANTE'S INFERNO? 

WSLL, NOT SXAOTLT. BUT IT*8 AHTWHSRS IN MSW YORK ALONG TBI LIKE 07 TBS 8X7BWAT. 



LIFE 



f%^#]l5MNvLM 




WHAT THE ELEPHANT THOUGHT. 
Into the city of Delhi so old, 
Seated at ease In a howdab of gold, 
With his fair lady. Lord Curzon so bold 

Entered with never a blink. 
Worshipped bis elephant was by the crowd ; 
All to incarnate old deities bowed — 
But as he heard all the shouting so loud. 

What did the elephant think? 

What did the elephant think of the show 
Where he was largely It, whether or no. 
As he advanced with tread stately and slow. 

All his trappings a-cllnk? 
What did he think when the others their trunks 
Raised and blew out their strange noises like 

chunks? 
Had he a thought of Chicagotown plunks? 

What did the elephant think? 

What did this elephant massive and tall. 

Ponderous, dignified, think of It all? 

Did he think he had heard Fame trumpet's call 

On immortality's brink? 
Or did be wish for the set of the sun. 
Wish such vain foolishness all he might shun? 
Didn't he wish from the start it was done? 

What did the elephant think? 

— Indianapolis News. 



An Indian Territory editor has this to say of hii 
work: 

"Editing a newspaper is a pleasant business — if 
you can stand it. 

"If it contains many advertisements, a subscriber 
complains that they take up too much space. If 
there is lack of advertising, it is unpopular and the 
people won't have it. 

"If we attend church regular, they say we go for 
effect. If we stay away from church, they say we 
are monstrously heathenish. 

"If we accept an invitation to a wedding, they 
say we are only invited to 'write it up.' 

"If we go to the opera house, they say we go on 
free tickets. If we are seen upon the streets too 
often, they say we neglect our business. If we 
avoid going on the street, they say we don't hustle 
around after the news. 

"If we publish a man who has brought disgrace 
upon his family, the friends of the family never for- 
give us. If we, out of goodness of heart, decline to 
say anything on the subject, the man's enemies are 
disappointed and we are branded as white-livered 
cowards." — Exchange, 

Ths latest child saying on record comes to us 
from a reader whose six -year-old son was the tri- 
umphant originator of it. Writing Just before 



Christmas to Santa Claus to tell him what would 
be appreciated as gifts by himself and his smaller 
brother, he was puzzled as to how he should sign 
it. He turned to his mother and Inquired, "Shall 
I say 'from your loving little friend, Willie/ or 
shall I say 'Amen,' as I do to Qod?" — London Doily 
Nexcs. 

A NUMBER of years ago suit was brought against 
the cashier of the State Bank of Iowa Palls, to re- 
cover an alleged deposit, which deposit the bamk 
denied. During the trial at Eldora. the defendant's 
attorney made a very convincing argument for his 
client, and took pains to tell the Jury of his client's 
high social and religious standing, and of the con- 
fidence of the people which he enjoyed, and endeav- 
ored to impress upon the minds of the Jury that 
the defendant was not the kind of a man to make a. 
mistake in the handling of other people's money. 

Tom H. Milner. then, as now. a witty as well 
as a very shrewd lawyer, represented the otber 
side, and In addressing the Jury said: 

"Gentlemen. I heartily concur in what my 
brother has said of the defendant ; I agree with bixn ' 
in each and every statement that he has made per- 
taining to Mr. 's good self; but I would have 

you consider deeply this one fact — Canada is full 
of Just such men."— Orecn Bag. 



Life Is for sale by all Newsdealers In Great Britain. Tbe International Mews 
Company, Bream^s Building, Chancery lAue. London, E. C. England, AGnrre. 



Established 1823. 

WILSON 
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THE CITY OF NEW TOBK, 

DEPARTMENT OF TAXI^S AND ASSESSAEENTS, 

mAIN OFFICE, BOBOVGH OF MANHATTAN, 



No. 280 BBOADWAT, 

January 12. 1903. 

NOTICE IS HEREBY GIVEN. AB 
required by the Greater New York 
Charter, that the books called "The 
Annual Record of the Assessed Valua- 
tion of Real and Personal E:8tate of the 
Boroughs of Manhattan, The Bronx, 
Brooklyn. Queens and Richmond, comr 
prising The City of New York," will be 
open for examination and correction on 
the second Monday of January, and will 
remain open until the 

1ST DAY OF APRIU 1903. 

During the time that th« books are 
open to public inspection, application 
may be made by any person or corpora- 
tion claiming to be aggrieved by the 
assessed valuation of real or personal 
estate to have the same corrected. 

In the Borough of Manhattan, at the 
main office of the Department of Taxes 
and AssesMments, No. 280 Broadway. 

In the Borough of The Bronx, at the 
office of the Etepartment. Municipal 
Building, One Hundred and Seventy- 
seventh street and Third Avenue. 

In the Borough of Brooklyn, at the 
officp of the Department. Municipal 
■'llni?. 



8TEWABT BUILDING. 

In the Borough of Queens, at the office 
of the Department, Hackett Building. 
Jackson Avenue and Fifth Street, Long 
Island City. 

In the Borough of Richmond, at the 
office of the Department, Masonic Build- 
ing, Stapleton. 

Corporations In all the Boroughs must 
make applijatlon only at the main office 
In the Borough of Manhattan. 

Applications In relation to the assessei 
valuation of personal estate must be 
made by the person atsessed at the office 
of the Department In the Borough where 
such person resides, and In the case of a 
non-resident carrj-lng on business in The 
City of New York, at the office of the 
Department of the Borough where such 
place of business is located between the 
hours of 10 A. M. and 2 P. M.. except 
on Saturday, when all applications must 
be made between 10 A. M, and 12 noon. 
JAME» L. WELJ.S, President. 
WILLJAM 8. COGSWELL. 
GEORGE J. GILLESPIE, 
SAMUEL STRASBOURGER, 
RUFI'S L. SCOTT. 
Commissioners of Taxes and Assess- 
ments. 



I 



No library should be without a 
complete set of Life. Bound vol- 
umes of Life Four Dollars each for 
the later volumes, bound in red and 
gold, green and gold, and full black. 
Prices of the earlier volumes and 
complete sets made known on appli- 
cation. The issues of Life for six 
months constitute a volume. 

To those who send unbound copies 
in good condition the price of the 
bouDd volume will be Two Dollars. 

Life Pubusbing Company, 
19 West Thirty-first Street, 
New York City. 



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LIFE 

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VELVET 



Most velvets are stretched. *• Nonpareil " Vel- 
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faster than that of other velvets, and its 
wear eparanteed. The dyers* name, J. A 
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JUarv Anderfon icritfg : ** Th^ ' Nonpareil ' V(l- 
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"Nonpareil" Velvet awarded Wrrt Oold Medals at 
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LIFE- 



^■r\ 



Pe??=! 



OoR. fboUSH 



(gNTEMPOi 




GREAT MEN AND THEIR JOKES. 
Lives of great men all remind us 
We may do great stunts as well. 
And. departing, leave behind us 
Anecdotes we didn't tell. 

— Wtuhington Post. 

For convenience, really superior hotel service 
for select patronage, and climate, there is nothing 
for New Yorkers quite like Lakewood, New Jersey. 
Laurel House. 
Laurel-in-the- Pines. 

"What is your father's objection to me. Mil- 
lie?" asked the young man. 

"He says you have no application, Gerald." 
"No application!" he echoed bitterly. "I won- 
der if he knows I've been coming to see you twice 
a week for nearly six years V'-^ChUxigo Tribune. 

Oft for Old Point Comfort, Va. Never miss 
you here. New man when you. return. What do 
you say? Will you go? Send a postal to the 
Chamberlin and get a booklet. 

"OmcER/' asked the Police Court Judge, "what 
made you think the prisoner was drunk?" 

"Well, your Honor, as he was going along the 
sidewalk he ran plump into a street lamp-post. 
He backed away, replaced his hat on his head, and 
firmly started forward again, but once more ran 
into the post. Four times he tried to get by the 
post, but each time his uncertain steps took him 
plump into the iron pole. After the fourth at- 
tempt and failiy^ to pass the post he backed off, 
fell to the pavement, and clutching his head in his 
hands, murmured, as one lost to all hope: 

" 'Lost ! Lost in an impenetrable forest !' " 

"Ten days," said the Court. — Qreen Bag, 

ELECTRIC-LIGHTED TRAIN TO CALIFORNIA. 

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cars, and dining cars. All agents sell tickets via 
Ibis route. 

Instructor: Mention some of the by-products 
of petroleum. 

Shagot-Haired Youno BfAN : Universities. — 
Chicago Tribune. 

Bear in mind that the Champagne you want is CSook'§ 
Imperial Extra Dry, Made in America, beUer than 
foreign makes. 

Small Bot : I got two lickings to-day. one from 
pa and one from ma. 

Bio Boy : Yes ; they are a spanking team. — 
Princeton Tiger. 



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LYMINQTON, ENGLAND 

There will be vacancies for five girls in the Spring term. 
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Liding and violin extra. Warm and healtliy climate. Address, 
IV1R5. MAN50N, Amcwocd Hoiiae» LymlDgton, BDg. 
Full information and circulars can be had by appljrtng to 
ieorge Batten & Co., 38 Park Row, New York. 



-"-^.rKSi-^ 



Our Costly 
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The water used in SCHLITZ Beer comes 
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The barley is the finest grown, selected 
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The hops come mostly from Bohemia, 
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All the air that touches SCHLITZ Beer is 
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DR. STALL "nd '^o 'n Asia. 

THE SELF AND SEX SERIES 

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Utile steam cainagF'fl— ^'The Toledo, 
Jr.''— reaily f«^T im meat ate tleliv^rj. We 
hnvo never so U1 one for Jess limn $mO. but, 
fori* while, we will eell these flirect from 
ihe factory at tflOO. *' Tlic ToUkIo. Jr.'' 
is Ririctty high grade ftnd nil ri^htin every 
respccl. Beit* r »n t quiek on Ibis* 

We tnnlrt* rtffinip f li'^-trfd nnrl KfuuilfDr' *iitoini>- 
hUi*»' wii'li tln?*em<' of pfi-ftt'lton In Ita cla*". 
It yrm want I'xjvtt milxUi^ mi ftntoFnoMJt*, 
wrU*f 118*. ""iVc emu t^upply tuiy )iijn\ iT <-'«f*»f:'Y 
rchirli:' yf*u want ut n Mr! 'a- tJiAt I* rtffntK i.fl.1- 
tdofpiv ami ■valujihlt' twMjiilfl tiit% 

The IniernatJonal Motor Car Co, 
3051 Central Avenae, TOLEDO. OHIO. 



The Highest Type of French Champagne 
CODMAN & HALL CO. 

AgwU for th9 U. 8. 
BOSTOM, - - - MASS.. 



GOUT & RHEUMATISM 



CuUkfl Great Eng^lish Remedy I 

BLAIR'S PILLS] 

$aff«« Sun. Cfrectlv«» 60a <^$1« 
PBTTGGISTS. or ZU WMtm Bt.. g. Y. \ 





Theoretically, the buffet- 
smoking-library cat of the 

GeMen State 
UmHed 

is for men only. 

Practically, it isn't. It is a fa- 
vorite resort for lady passengers— a 
place where they go for an hour or 
two, while husband, brother, father 
or friend talks tariff revision and 
smokes a fragrant cigar. 

The Golden State Limited leaves Chicago daily 
via the El Paso-Rock Island route. Less than 
three days to Los Angeles. Through cars to Santa 
Barbara and San Francisco. Electric lights ; elec- 
tric fans ; bath room ; barber shop ; Booklovers' 
library ; compartment and stand- 
ard sleepers ; observation, dining 
and library cars. 



Cut out this ad and mail it, with name and 
address, to this office, and beautifully illus- 
trated book about California will be sent free. 




LIFE 




No attempt to improve 
upon the work of nature in 
making Shredded Wheat, 
The properties naturally 
organised are scientifically 
cooked- That is all, 

ill j.-j][3r-*i F]I£E* AilTlicbi. 

l>/^e NATURAL FOOD CO, 

NiAinrA rails, N« Y. 



One taste convinces 

KORN-KMSP 

Atwsys ready io eat 



JAHAICA 




57Pt*WS we'st indies 



An ideal spot in whicb to gpend a winter's Tacation 
and aTold all the extremes of tlie northern climate. 

UNITED FRUIT CO.'S 
STEAMSHIP LINES 

operate weeklj between BOSTON and PHILADEL- 
PHIA and JAMAICA, the magnllicent twin-screw 
U. S. MaU Steamsblps : 
Admiral Dewey Admiral Sampson 

Admiral Schl|y Admiral Parragut 

RalllBfi rSkIr from Boitoa aad Philadelphia 
Fare for round trip. Including stateroom accommo- 
dations and meals, $76 ; one way, $40. 

Bead fir oar beaatlfhil booklet whef her 70B coatem- 
plate the trip or aot 

UNITED FRUIT COMPANY 



'«r 8, North Wharves, 
PHILA. 



Long Wharf, 
BOSTON 

11 Information and Tickets of Local Agent 



DOMIHION LINE toEUROPZ 




Boston to ptieinstown and Liverpool 

N, roiumonwoaltli. 1 StOOO Ions 
^. t^eiv EnjElaud, 1 1,400 t^nn 
S» iKM^aiiadA, ■ lO^OUOtoikN 

.««. »l, |Cl«rifiClt ^ lKC3&tonM 

EDITERRANEAN SERVICE 

.%ls;lerii^l-eiiiiA» ^a|iS«a nil AleX^ 

AEldrla. S-nl for lllu>^iriiktl fkraklet. 

OOWIRION LINE 

T ^ i rL r I S 1 TK'K' \ , - liOPTO N 

ti^ lW'ririN»rii STTWt, CiilCJlf.io 




Unlimited Comfort 

Half a million dollars is the expense of new 
equipment this season on the California 
Limited. You pay nothing extra for 
these added comforts. 

Most experienced travelers prefer the California Limited. They 
find luxurious ease in the cosy compartment and observation Pull- 
mans. They enjoy the diversified scenery, a thrilling panorama of 
valley and peak, forest and plain ; no wearisome monotony. They 
appreciate the superior dining-car meals, '* Santa Fe all the way,'* 
Chicago and Kansas City to Los Angeles, San Diego and San Francisco. 

Such a train will please you, too. Why be satisfied with less than 
the very best? You can visit Grand Canyon of Arizona en route. 

Our other through California trains carry standard Pullmans, 
tourist sleepers and chair cars. 



Atchison, Topeka & 
Santa Fa R*y. 



Santa Fe 



Geaoral Pa s aeajer 
•Offko, 




Nothing 
cheap about 

Bicycle 

Playing Cards 
except the 



price. 



They wear well. 20 baclcs, including 
new Automobile designs. The back 
shown is "Pedal" design. Order 
by name. Sold by dealers. 

The U. S. Playing Card Co. 

Cincinnati, U. S. A. 

We will send 128-page Condensed Hoyie 
for 10c. stamps, if addressed to Dept. 61. 



$1,200 A YEAR rOR LIFE 

Secured by Small Monthly Payments 

There is nothing speculative about crude rubber. It can be sold every day in the year, in every market in the world and at 
a stable price that has been steadily advancing for many years. For a quarter of a century the world*s supply of crude rubber has 
always been spoken for months before it has reached a civilized market. It can be gathered every day in the year irrespective of 
weather or season. The ignorant and improvident natives who gather it to-day almost invariably ** tap to death" the tree that 
brings them their golden harvest, and in the virgin jungle no white man can live to guide and oversee them. Hence, the price has 
doubled in ten years, and the question of the world's supply of rubber for the future becomes of vast moment. 



We a.re che^nging the production of Crude Rubber from the primitive a.i\d destruc- 
tive method heretofore employed to the most scientific a.nd economic pla.n known to 
modern forestry. No industry ever underwent so ra.dica.1 a development a.s we a.re 
now enga.ged in without ma.king immensely wea.lthy those who a.ccomplished the 
cha.ntfe. Here is a. sa.fe. conserva.tive» a.nd perma.nent investment in a.n industry 
new enough to be immensely profita.bles yet old enough to ha.ve lost a.11 element 
of risk. 



We have 6.175 acres of land in the state of Chiapas, the most fertile soil in Mexico, and we are developing this land into a 
commercial rubber orchard under the most successful conditions and plans known to scientific forestry. We are selling shares in 
this plantation, each representing an undivided interest equivalent to an acre of land. 

Each acre as soon as it is sold is cleaied and planted to 600 rubber trees ; 400 of these are tapped to death before maturity, 
leaving at the end of the development period 200 trees, the normal number per acre for permanent yield. The advantage of this 
method is that by beginning the tapping thus early dividends begin also in the same year. 

Any one can own such ^hares, or acres, by paying for them in small monthly instalments. Supposing you buy only five. 
You pay $20 a month for 12 months, then $10 a month for a limited period, until you have paid the full price of the shares in the 
present series — ♦276 each ; but during the period of these payments you will have received dividends amounting to $210 per share ; 
hence the actual cost of your shares, or acres, is only $66 each, and you own real estate then worth at least $2,600, and from the 
maturity period onward, as long as you live, your five acres, or shares, will yield you a yearly income of $1,200. This is a most 
conservative estimate (based on Government reports of the United States and Great Britain, the most reliable sources of informa- 
tion in the world) for 200 trees per acre, and figuring them as yielding each only two pounds of crude rubber per year, a total of 
400 pounds ^t 60 cents net per pound. Of course, if you buy 10 shares your income would be $3,400 yearly, or better still, 25 shares 
will yield $6,000 a year. 



Five Acres, or Shares, in our Rubber Orchard planted to 1,000 Rubber trees will at 
maturity yield you a sure and certain income of $100 a month for more years than 
you can possibly live. Your dividends average 25 per cent, during the period of small 
monthly payments. 



Every possible safeguard surrounds this investment. The State Street Trust Company of Boston holds the title to our prop- 
erty in Mexico as Trustee. We agree to deposit with them the money paid in for shares, and we file with them sworn statements 
as to the development of the property. This Company alio acts as Registrar of our stock. We agree to place with the Trust 
Company a cash forfeit to be held as security to the shareholders that we will fulhl every detail of our contract. You are fully 
protected against loss in case of lapse of payment, or in case of death, and you are granted a suspension of payments for ninety 
days at any time you wish. Furthermore, we agree to loan you money on your shares. 



RUBBER! Indispensable as wheat or cotton* or coal. American manufacturers alone 
consume annually sixty million pounds of crude rubber, worth at least forty million 
dollars. Yet the supply falls short of the demand. The immediate completion of the 
Pacific cable would consume the entire available supply of rubber in the United States 
to*day. 



If we can prove to you that five shares in this investment, paid for in small monthly instalments, will bring you an average 
return of TWENTY-FIVE PER CENT. ON YOUR MONEY DURING THE PERIOD OF PAYMENT, and will then bring 
you $100 a MONTH FOR MORE THAN A LIFETIME, we could not keep you out. Send us $30 as the first monthly payment 
to secure 5 shares — $40 for 10 shares — $100 for 25 shares ($4 per share for as many shares as you wish to secure). This opens 
the door for yourself, not to wealth, but to what is far better, a competency for future years, when perhaps you will not be able •p 
earn it. We already have hundreds of shareholders scattered through 40 states, who have investigated and invested. Our literature 
explains our plan fully and concisely, and proves every statement. It will be sent to you immediately, on request. 

Mutual Rubber. Production Co. 

87 MILK STREET. BOSTON. MASS. 



r«ii 

lir 




LIFE 



February 12, 1908. 







"i 



i 




HAS THE |f» 

STRENGTH OF, fl 
GIBRALTAR J Ivi 



AMOUNTS 
SI00.000to>IR 



Greatest Record 



in the History of this 
Qiant Company 



LIFE INSURANCE ISSUED AND PAID FOR 

during 190a, including Ordinuy- Iniurance (f 87,000,000), over 
ASSETS, end of 190 a, over 
INCOME, during 190a, over 

PAID POLICY-HOLDERS, during 190a, over 

SURPLUS, over 

POLICIES IN FORCE, nearly . 



60 

33 

9 

9 

5 



Millions 

Millions 
Millions 
Millions 
Millions 



Millions 
INCREASE IN PAID-FOR INSURANCE in Force, over 108 Millions 



MAKING THE GRAND TOTAL OF 



Paid-for Insurance in Force over 800 Millions 

Paid Policy-holders in 27 Years, neariy 68 Millions 

Features of the Year's Administration were 

Marked Reduction in Expense Rate, Increased Dividends to Policy-Holders. 

The Progressive Management and the Judicious Care of, and Liberality in Dealing with, 
Policy-holders* Interests, have made this 

ONE OF THE GREAT LIFE INSURANCE COMPANIES OF THE WORLD 

Write for Information of Policies or Agencies, Dept, O. 

The Prudential 



Home Ofrioer 
Newark, N. J. 



INSURANCE CO. OF AMERICA. john f. drvden. 

President. 



VOLUME XLI. 



NEW YORK, FEBRUARY 19, 1903. 

Entered at the New York Post OfUce as Second-Class Mail Matter. 
Copyright, 1902. by Lipb Publishing Company. 



'^-'LXJ^S'o /' 



NUMBER 1060. 




■LESr WE FORGET' 

' TUEl^miltE, I WELL KEM^M»f» WHBN TOU WEtlB tlTTLE AMi TlfJDE ON MY BACK-' 



co^vwiQNT worn oncAT BHITAIN BV JAMCC ncnocnbon 

UNOCN THC ACT Or 1891. 



LIFE 



w 



9 





^ •' 







^< g ^ * 



1 



^*^ -2. y // 



To Remove All Misapprehension 

The Ladies' Home Journal, in prinring oa its front cover for February 
a small sketch by Charles Dana Gibson (not originally drawn for 
that periodical, but an advertisement, arranged for by the publisher of 
his annual book), makes the misleading comment that "the original of the 
drawing sold in New York City for $80." As we have recently con- 
cluded a $100,000 contracft with Mr. Gibson» it seems proper to cor- 
re<fl the impression that the right to reproduce his original drav^ang? 
may be had for any such sum as $80; and, in justice to Mr. Gibson 
and to the two periodicals which control his work {Life and CoIlier^S 
}Veekly\ we print, with his consent, the above contrad, which shows 
the price paid for his original drawings Mt first hand. 

New York, January 30, 1903 COLUER'S WEEKLY 



LIFE 





THE MERRY WAR MANCEUVRES. 
Out o'er the ocean's mighty breast 

Loud rang the cannon's roar; 
Upon the cruiser's bridge there stood 

Lieutenants I to IV. 
The Admiral so stanch and true 
Then calmly viewed the fray. 
While through his hat imaginary 
Bullets tore their way. 

Imaginary men were dead. 
Imaginary blood so red. 
Imaginary sea-wolves fed, 
Throughout the sunlit day. 

Imaginary shot and shell 

Plowed through the quivering air, 
The Admiral then raved and tore 

Imaginary hair. 
For well he knew that down below 

Lay on the mess-room floor 
Imaginary sailors in imaginary gore. 
Imaginary wounds they had. 
Imaginary foes were glad. 
Imaginary parents sad. 
And wounds and blood galore. 

The Admiral then turned unto 

Lieutenant No. IV. 
Requesting him as referee 
To figure up the score; 
And getting out his little book. 
He sadly sighed and said: 
"According to the latest rules. 
For two days we've been dead. 
Imaginary shot and shell, 
Imaginary mines as well. 
Imaginary minds now tell. 
That we the sharks have fed." 
-Porter Emerson Broton in the United Service. 



ir^^^AvTlJvLU^ 



LAUNCHED ON LIFE'S BILLOWY SEA. 

About seventy-five people gathered at Hotel 
Paisley last Thursday evening to witness the cere- 
mony that bound together the lives of Mr. John 
Simmons and Ida Hamilton. Rev. Stark officiated 
in an able and impressive manner. . . . The 
bride looked charming attired in a white silk dress 
trimmed in white appliqud, and carrying a 
bouquet of pretty flowers. The groom looked at 
his best in a suit of black. The sacred ceremony 
was begun, pursued, and ended without the slight- 
est hesitation. . . . Such Joy prevailed that 
the happy moments seemed to flee all too rapidly; 
but for an hour prattle and chatter and merry 
laughter gave evidence of supreme happiness. . . . 
Following is the list of gifts received: . . . 
Syrup Jug, Frances Suit, . . ^. shaving mug 
Michael and Pearl Suit, syrup Jug Mr. and Mrs. V. 
Conn, syrup Jug Mr. and Mrs. Alvin Moss, syrup 
Jug and tray Mr. and Mrs. Frank Light, syrup Jug 
Mr. and Mrs. J. J. Moore, pocketbook from groom 
to bride. Hair chain from bride to groom. — Che- 
waucan {Wis.) Post. 

It is related that while in New York. Professor 
Lorenz one evening at dinner was seated next to a 
clergyman, who was describing to the great Aus- 
trian how deplorable were moral conditions on the 
Bast Side. "Why, professor," said the minister, 
"I heard an eleven-year-old girl over there one day 
step up to a boy of about her own age, and say, 
'I'll lick hell out of you.' " Dr. Lorenz looked puz- 
zled, for he is not familiar with American slang. 
"Lick." he said; "was ist doa 'lick?'" "Why, 
'lick,' " said the clergyman, a little puzzled in re- 
turn, " Mick' is to kick out of, to stamp out from, 
to eradicate." "Oh." said the professor, "and 
•hell.' I don't know 'hell.' " "Well, 'hell' sUnds 
for all wickedness, everything that la wicked." 



**Ye8. I see." slowly responded Dr. Lorenz; "the 
leetle girl said to the leetle boy she would stamp 
out. eradicate everything wicked from him. But 
why should that be so bad?" — Argonaut. 

CoNQRESSMAM CANNON, who is a power in argu- 
ment and quick at repartee, enjoys displays of sim- 
ilar resourcefulness in others. 

During a hot summer campaign in Illinois he 
sought temporary rest in a hammock stretched 
imder the trees in the yard of a country hotel. 
From his window the shade looked inviting, but on 
the spot he found the lawn strewn with tomato cans, 
potato peelings, and other debris. On many of these 
more or ley unsanitary mounds were myriads of 
files. 

"I had no sooner stretched myself in the ham- 
mock," said Mr. Cannon, "than these files attacked 
me. seemingly by the million. It was intolerable, 
and in no pleasant frame of mind I looked up the 
proprietor. 

" 'What do you mean,' I demanded, 'by stretch- 
ing your hammock in that fiy-haunted field of tor- 
ture you call a lawn?' 

" 'I know the files are bad out there now.' he 
answered, 'but, Mr. Cannon, you ought to use the 
hammock during hammock hours, and you'd have 
no trouble from the flies.' 

" 'What are hammock hours?' I inquired. 

" 'From 12 noon to 2 P. M. daily,' he replied. 
'During those hours files will not attack you in the 
hammock.' 

"I was much interested in the man's Socratlc 
skill in evading the issue, and wishing to draw him 
out I asked: 

" 'Why are there no files around the hammock 
between 12 and 2?' 

" 'Oh.' he rejoined, 'at that time they're all in 
the dining-room.' " — Saturday Evening Post. 



JAHAICA 




S^t'^S WEST INDIES 



An ideal spot in which to spend a wlnter^s vacaUon 
and avoid all the extremes of the northern climate. 

UNITED FRUIT CO/S 
STEAMSHIP LINES 

operate weekly between BOSTON and PHILADEL- 

PuIA and JAMAICA, the magnificent twin-screw 

U. 8. MaU Steamahips : 
Admiral Dewey Admiral Sampaon 

Admiral Schley Admiral Parragiit 

Saillagt Weekly from Boitoa aad Philadelphia 

Fare for round trip, including stateroom acconimo- 

dationa and meala, $76 ; one way, $40. 

flead fir oar beaatlfhil booklet whether yoa coatem- 
plate the trip or not 

UNITED FRUIT COMPANY 



Pier 5, North Wharvea, 
PMILA. 



Lone Wharf. 
BOSTON 



Poll Information and Tickets of Local Agent 



Fancy Apples 

from the famous Lake Shore sec- 
tion of Western New York, 

Kings, Baldwins, Greenings, Northern 

Spys, Russets, Spitzenlwrgs, 

Seel(-no-furthers, Etc. 

Each one selected, wrapped with 
great care, singly in paper and per- 
fectly packed in boxes. In single 
varieties or assorted. 

Delivered at your door, all 
charges paid, for $3.00 per box 
containing 100 to 125 apples ac- 
cording to size and variety, cash 
with order. Also 

Fancy Evaporated Apples 

prepared and packed by us, suitable 
for sauces, pies, etc. Will keep in- 
definitely. Directions inside. 2 5 -lb. 
box, ;?!3.5o; 50-lb. box, ^6.00. 

Money re/nntUd if not at we state. We are the 
largest individual skippers of apples in the United 
States. Our cold storage capacity is 300fiOO barrels. 

£.M.Upton&Co.Hiltoa,N.Y. 



** Built to run and daes U ' ' 
A pmctical realliatton of the JdcuJ— 

Tbt Oldsmoblle Isthu cbiJd of (ii'< 
ceiwSTj-, amply filling the demonii for 
% FL'lbhlc, lijMiHly and iftfe Antomn- 
btlv At Ol t^opukr pricQ. 

th« BaiJi<riichtm or Un TOOO driTiTi'. 
TmltfltioniiAlnByv lack thtj [icrf t'ctn m 
of thftoriciiiol — !he pioTn-cT runabotit 
\^ r\e M^Mt Thing Oft Wheilf. 

Price $650.00. 

WHU^ for LlJij£tr&k<d book ta IMrt. Jh 

Olds Motor Works^ 

Detroit, Mlch« 



LIFE 



White Wash Fabrics 



For 1903. 




ta^fttrrd Trm4f-Mmrk. 



This season marked prominence is given to the white 
good 5. They will be more popular, if possible, than 
last year. 

Many new weaves and exclusive designs are displa^xd* 
particularly in the heavier /abrics which can be comfort- 
ably worn in the early spring and at the seastiore and 
mountains. Among them we mention : 



English and French Shirtings, 
Fancy Piques, 
Mercerized Cheviots, 
Fancy Vestings, 
Mercerized Madras, 
Embroidered Linens, 
Irish and German Linens, 
Silk and linen Tokios, 

We also show a very wide line of dainty colored 
fabrics of every desirable kind. 

Mail orders have prompt attention. 

James McCutcheon & Co. 

14 West 23d Street, New York, 



35c» to 60c. yd, 
3Sc. to $1-00 yd. 
35c. to $1-00 yd, 

55c. to 95c, yd. 

40c. to 60c, yd. 

. $1,20 yd. 

45c. to $1,25 yd. 




Above all, don't miss Santa 
Catalina. 

There's nothing like it in California, 
nothing like it anywhere else in America — a great rock, 
twenty miles long by three to four miles wide, rising right 
out of the sea. 

The fishing is une quale d — yellow tail, barracuda ^ sea 
bass and tuna. 

Santa Catalina is only 3f hours from Los Angeles, and 
Los Angeles is less than three days from Chicago, via the 

Golden State Limited 

The best train, via the best route. 



Compartment and standard sleepers ; dinliigf 
library and observation cars. Electric lighls ; 
electric fans; barbershop; bafh room; Book^ 
lovers' Library. Runs over the El Pa^o-Rock 
bland route. 

Tickets anc^juU information at thia office. 
CaJJ or write* 

J no. Sebastian, P.T.M., Chicago, III. 






NOW KING 
OF HAVANA CIGARS 

Mai1# ^r^ tta^rtruk and TaTnpa ' 




Special Offer 



French . 
Court ^ 
Memoirs 




Tvi^n (jf Uu Hurry (*hcwt p?T?rf>iui.l mt-nniin 
tKv-upy funr cif tbrt Vrplqxucfi) UiUi nut f>f 

CoTi>^ it* otftwi^ indJ'ilftfUutJouiL Ajid where- 
eamiii;!! W1U wic aTocrt K^-lth Mtort^t imd obvcurc 

wliere bcuiMr t<aitDf?UBfliE-tnt«<) ti^mlrw Atid the 
vewiiffd T&t^ttj ar fiTorit^^ iiiatij^attMl cam- 

HdMl forth tb«i Xiiriih. t« "bky ifiiif«< tbo lulf ot 
BorapA^ It \m jimrntMlblc' to compiFf b^nd Ehi* curU 
OiM ervtiti nt "hlMtorj without koowLn^ tliA lntt<- 
inwfa dtriidl* Of thow tindfrlTtnf r^upe^ 
It If* <?hnnic.<tei'ti<tk' Df tbvHv !lfe»iJ4>ir»tluLi. In 



lUau Juumt 1>P B4itiit 

deidln? wttlt Ui« pucimu nlfmlm wtUrli nm wpa^ 
rLB,t4sl ill ftwr^rotie'i mtDd t^iib fn'iu^h OcMit^ 
hlitQT7 of itiv pcTinl. th^it vt'^rv timpiAn^eiCf MiA 
lnuit£tt»« puF^et tbfiSQ of <il oiremne, 

Tli« QBdni^iiiAil «mtr«lfl » few iota of iAmem^ 
jmwKinai FnmftiOoQTt SI(^iio|i*itrBJiBliil0d wUA 
HdflUir Into EnirlWi) whieh eu he wvnirnl, Iji 
oouil^k!^ Hffto onlr* *t * T^TT ]«vr ftrii.'e, uhI on 
mmJl monthly fMyineiitfl, it prtf t-rred^ pTCi^'ldMl 
itfil^tlctliioii be mAde At onoe. 

Tbi^Ae tvff »]piaA ftrv trom a UffnitAl 1 
imd rpgifltf Ted *%* hut* odllion, imaud tt|^ ha I 
«t flO » TalBitifc. Bui Ihroufrh ft btndea'ii tni 
th» l«Kth«r of tlie tdIuud-a H tmp«tfMU3r 






Pleiiae §eDil me pttrttouJH-rfr— MlrertiwiJUt^At Ut 



N«me . 



AddrooB 



ehofdi&laK »nd Jit^ 4. yrv^e itboitf vtrBal 
to the Tuiueof thu iiiLixitind iliFclra. 

A tj4><)kiiit ftii^v tS wi.^ntiintf t^e eiJtp 
tlijtj VfiW tufHht, i^JtEVtlter «t(li r<r^^ 
i.riut|4?{ilA(«t If ytm OlgN HAd wMnA tMam 
fftLicrirr iLlp In tbo atbur eoniMc at 

J.B.CflAD80i;Rr4B,Secr. 
II Eut iMH &tt New V^rK. 






LIFE 






149 




The Sitter qf the Sitter: oh, tkb, it^b a good likbnbss, but tou khow paANOBS always did takb wbll. 
(And the artist happens to be even more than ordinarUy eenHUve.) 



Opportunity. 



'T'HE display of wealth in gowns, diamonds 
*- and Jewelry of all kinds at omclal and 
prlTate receptions and entertainments was never 
80 great in Washington as it is at present.— 
WasMnffton Letter. 

The next witness was a girl of thirteen, who 
testifled that she worked at night, twelve hoors 
oontinnonsly, tending a spinning machine, for 
three and one- half cents an hojxc.—Newepaper 
Report of the Proceedingt of the Gray Oommiseion. 

The American standard of living is, 
of course, what the protective tariff 
ultimately protects. 



But in the meanwhile, the character 
of our civilization is opportunity. 
Twenty years from now that young 
girl may be living in Washington, and 
never thinking of going anywhere with 
less than a peck of diamonds on her. 

Bills. 
^PHE President fumes and frets and 
causes trust bills to be prepared. 
Representatives in Congress knit their 
brows and prepare trust bills. Senators 
look serious and prepare trust bills. 



Trust bills to burn, but no legislation 
in sight. 

Out West there is some forcible seiz- 
ing of coal trains by mobs. 

An effect of legislatures trifling with 
great emergencies is, finally, the re- 
sumption of the legislative function by 
the Sovereign. When the people legis- 
late they waste no time with bills. 
They go about the business rudely, 
savagely, perhaps, but without circum- 
locution. 



J50 



LIFE 




•• WkiU there is U/e there's Hope:' 

VOL. XLl. FEB. 19, 1908. No. 1060. 

19 Wbst Thibtt-Pirst St., Niw Yori. 



Published everj Thursday. (SbOO a year In ad- 
▼auoe- Postage to foreign conntries In the Postal 
Union, 11.04 a year extra, s^lnsle current copies, 
10 cents. Back numbers, after three months from 
date of publication. 26 cents. 

No contribution wilt be returned un/ess 
accompanied by stamped and addressed 
envelope. 

The illustrations in Life are copyrighted^ 
and are not to be reproduced. 

Prompt notification should be sent by sub- 
scribers of any change of address. 




/^UR bamptions contemporary, The 
^^ Philistine, asserts at some length 
and with fervor that society ought to 
pay for some of the law's mistakes. 
When a man is hanged for a crime 
which it is finally discovered he did 
not commit, it would be graceful, at 
least, to pay something to his heirs. If 
a man is imprisoned for an offence of 
which he is presently found to have 
been innocent, there is nothing to do 
now but to pardon him, and turn him 
back into the world, broken, impover- 
ished and disgraced. That is wrong. 
In so far as money can make up to him 
for what he has suffered, his sufferings 
should be salved. He should have a 
right to sue the State for heavy dama- 
ges because it made a mistake. Even 
when it merely happens that a man is 
arrested and held a long time, and 
tried for a crime, and manages to dem- 
onstrate his innocence, and is ac- 
quitted, there should be some repara- 
tion coming to him. At least he should 
be reimbursed for his loss of time and 
the expenses of his defense. That limi- 
ted degree of justice is done, it seems, 
in only one country in the world — 
in Utopian New Zealand. The terrible 
hardships that innocent individuals 
occasionally suffer by the blunders of 
courts and juries have always been rec- 
ognized. The inconvenience of fram- 
ing laws which provide for reparation 



for such hardships is appreciated. But 
in an advanced state of society such 
laws should be framed. Justice that 
ignores its innooent yictims is not 
justice. We are the State, and the 
State is rich. When we do a great 
wrong we ought at least to pay dama- 
ges. It is mean, as well as brutal of us, 
to say there is no law that punishes 
our mistake, and that we will give no 
redress. 






'yHERE is a difference in the Red 
Cross. The merits of it have not 
fully transpired, but Miss Clara Barton 
is on one side, and a number of very 
respectable people are on the other. 
These respectable people have pro- 
tested to Congress and the President 
that Miss Barton has managed to make 
herself the sole tyrant of the Red 
Cross, and that no one else has any 
power. Miss Barton's friends say that 
she has done nothing wrong, and had 
particularly good reasons for all that 
she did. The public doesn't like to see 
disputes in the Red Cross, and it par- 
ticularly dislikes any dispute by which 
Miss Barton seems likely to suffer. 
She is a veteran, and is honored as a 
veteran. If she can be backed up, she 
should be backed up hard ; if she must 
be let down, she should be let down 
easy. Ladies and gentlemen, please 
arbitrate this matter. A war in the 
Red Cross is unbecoming. Nobody 
wants to see the Red Cross managers 
carried off the field on their own 
stretchers. 



knows. Mark Twain has drawn 
heavily both on what he knows and 
what he doesn't know to make his 
articles, and has pieced out his knowl- 
edge and lack of knowledge with 
imaginings that for scope, size and in- 
credibility beat anything The Hemew 
ever printed before* 




n^HE New York State Legislature 
^ has been discussing whether it 
ought not to restrain the patent medi- 
cine business. The State Constitution 
says the freedom of the press shall not 
be abridged. Nine-tenths of the news- 
papers of the State lean yery heavily 
on the patent medicine advertisements 
for support. Anyone who thinks that 
the patent medicine business can be 
restrained without abridging the free- 
dom of the press is grievously mis- 
taken. Patent medicine is often bad 
for takers, but is always good for 
newspapers. It won't be restrained. 





OOME of the Pennsylvania legislators 
'^ want to abolish caricatures. No 
wonder, but no such half -measure 
would help them. What Quay's pup- 
pets need is a law that no one shall 
look at them, nor speak of them. 
Nothing less than to be ignored will 
make them safe. 




^VT ARK TWAIN continues to dis- 
cuss Christian Science in The 
North American Btciew, His deliver- 
ances have the merit of originality. 
Christian Science is a nebulous sort of 
persuasion, about which almost anyone 
can say almost anything without pre- 
vious preparation, and with little em- 
barrassment for want of knowledge. 
What one doesn't know about it makes 
just as good discourse as what he 



A T this writing New Mexico and 
■"^^ Arizona have not yet been made 
States. They are utterly unworthy in 
character and importance of such a dis- 
tinction. The time may come when 
they will be fit to become States, but 
at present the sort of distinction they 
are worthy of is to have Senator Quay 
for their champion. He wants two 
more rotten-borough States in the 
Union. Sit tight, good Congressmen, 
and keep them out 1 



LIFE 



I5J 






%y^3^^ 



' VATRSB, I OUmOT TBLL A LIS. I DOKK IT- 




" THB BAT ITflBLT 18 TSRT PRBTTT, BUT DOBS IT OO WBLL WITH XT 
HORHS?** 

The Baby's Omar. 

MAR'S the fad ! Well then, let uh indite 
The shape of verse old Omar used to write ; 

And Juveniles are up. So we opine 
A Baby's Omar would be out of sight ! 

Methinks the stunt is easy. Stilted stvle, 
A misplaced Capital once in a while, — 

Josephine Daskam does it like a shot ; 
And can't I do it too ? Well, I should Smile ! 

But how I ramble on. I must dismiss 
Dull Sloth, and set to Work at once, I wis ; 

I sometimes think there's nothing quite so hard 
As a Beginning. Say we start like this : 
Indeed, indeed my apron ofl before 
I tore, but was I naughty when I tore ? 

And then, and then came Ma, and thread in hand 
Repaired the rent in my small pinafore. 

A Penny Trumpet underneath the Bough, 
A Drum that's big enough to make a Row ; 

A Toy Fire-Engine, and a squeaking Doll, 
Oh, Life were Pandemonium enow. 

Come, fill the Cup, then quickly on the floor 
Your portion of the Porridge gaily pour. 

The Nurse will Spank you,and she'll be discharged, — 
Ah, but of Nurses there be Plenty more. 

Yes, I can do it I Now, if but my Purse 
Some kindly Editor will reimburse, 

I'll write a Baby's Omar ; for I'm sure 
These Sample Stanzas here are not so worse. 

Carolyn WeUs, 

Greed. 

O ENATOR ALDRICH'S protest against •* the sacrifice 
^ of the manufactTinng and indnstrial interests of the 
country to the greed of the agricultnral interests of the 
West" is timely. 

Congress should keep it ever in mind that whereas the 
people of the East have mostly had the sentiments of sordid 
avarice refined out of them, the people of the West are 
new, yet, and pretty hoggish. 

We cannot, as a Christian nation, afford to let any class 
suffer through being deficient in greed. 







" what's that. 



my 




i:-^^' 




TOU TOUHO MnXSKULL?- 






, (^j**^ii|j%!f- 




IS2 



LIFE 




""^m^ 



YOU aone it v 




'rATHBB, LET XX FINI8U. Z VOKS IT 




^t'* 








I8H*T THIS BOUQUIT THBOWIHO BUMO RATHBB OVBBDONB? 




"THAT WILL DO, XT SON. TOUR FUTURE L1K8 
IN THE XILITART PROFESSION. TOU HAVE ALREADT 
BXeUN BT MURDERING THE KINO'S ENGLISH/' 



PERHAPS the best descriptton of Nancy Has- 
ton Banks^s novel, OUfJUld, that can be 
irlven In a few words is to call it a Kentucky 
"Cranford/* It is a delightful picture of a 
YiUage in the Pennyroyal region in the days 
before the war. It hardly seems like a story. 
To have read the book is simply to have visited 
Oldfleld, met its people and learned to love 
them. (The Macmillan Company. $1 60.) 

Edward Jleynddt is a novel by W. L. LUli- 
bridge which suggests unaccustomed gambols 
in the broad pastures of Action. Little green 
anachronisms, the rank smartweed of poor 
repartee and the sour-grass of faulty syntax are 
all cropped with the relish of good timothy and 
clover. (The Qrafton Press.) 

Thomas A. Janvier's intimate acquaintance 
with the life and tradiUons of the South of 
France unites with his charm of style, genial 
optimism of outlook and graceful humor to 
make an exceptionally alluring volume of his 
description of three fStes among the Proven- 
ceaux, which is called The Christmas Kalends 
0/ Provenee. (Harper and Brothers. $1.25.) 

Mr. Raymond L. Bridgman's Loyal Traitors 
is a Boston anti-imperialistic capsule— a large 



dose of political argument enclosed in a thin 
shell of soluble notion. In medical prac- 
tice the method is effective for obvious rea- 
sons. In literature it is suggestive of April- 
fool candy. (James H.West Company, Boston. 
$1.00.) 

The love ailkirs of prominent writers is a 
snt^ect which has been so treated and mal- 
treated by literary paragraphers that the title 
Storits of Authors' Zones is almost one to shy 
at. Clara E. Lsnghlin'stwo handsome volumes 
bearing this name, however, are prompted by 
so genuine an interest, and written with so 
nice a feeling, that they are thoroughly at- 
tractive. (Charles Scribner's Sons, 2 volumes. 
$8.00.) 

Professor Maxwell Somerville of the Uni- 
versity of Pennsylvania claims for A Wan- 
derer's Legend that it is a summary of a six- 
teenth century manuscript discovered by him 
in India. It contains an account of the life 
of the Wandering Jew up to 1529. If there is 
such a manuscript, a literal translation might 
interest students. The present volume has 
neither antiquarian nor Actional value. (Drex- 
el Biddle, Philadelphia.) 

Lois Mallets Dangerous Oift is a very dainty 
story for girls by Mary Katherine Lee. It is 
told with a simplicity which at once suits the 
little Quaker heroine and emphasizes the 
beauty of the story. (Houghton, Mifflin and 
Company. 85c.) 

J. B, Ksrfoot. 



LIFE 



153 




▲ viBw OF mw TOHK.— By a Pe$Hmist. 




WHAT'S that, sir? A book for a 
lady? A new book? Oh, yes, 
sir — yes, sir, we've got plenty of new 
books. Indeed, I never saw a season 
with so many new books in it. 
Everybody's writln'. New authors 
crop up every day and all the old 
ones are at it again. 

Book for a lady. H'm, let me see. 
Now, what kind of a lady is she, 
sir? Of course, I mean what kind 
of a readin' lady? They're so differ- 
ent, you know. 

Now, some of 'em like real books, 
same as men, but mostly they like 



Flossy books. 

What are they? Oh, that's just my 
name for 'em. Flossy books, you 
know, are books that seem real nice, 
and most people like them, but 
there's really nothin' to 'em. 

Now, if this here lady of yours 
likes that kind, there's nothing would 
please her so much as "Mrs. Wiggs 
of the Cabbage Patch." 

What? You never heard of that? 
Well, that's funny. It's been a best- 
seller all this season. The people 
that like it just simply adore it, you 
know. They rave over it, and they 



say, "Such humor! Such pathos!" 

It's like a Christmas card; gives 
you a sort of mental lithograph of 
"Father, dear father, come home with 
me now," and "Eva, lit-tle E-va," all 
jumbled up together, while the angels 
look down through the snowflakes. 

Oh, no. It isn't really like that. 
That's just the way it strikes me. 
It's really like Mrs. Wiggins's books 
— just exactly like 'em. I s'pose 
that's why it's called Mrs. Wiggs. 

You don't think your lady'd like 
it, eh? Well, I think she would, 
'cause a hundred out of every ninety- 



154 



LIFE 



nine women do. Still, you know 
best. What authors does she like? 

Barrie? Oh, laws, yes, Barriers out 
in great shape this year. "The Little 
White Bird." Finest book since 
"Trilby." I've read it three times, 
and on my fourth. My, if I get 
talkin' 'bout that book, I can't never 
stop. 

You've seen it advertised? Well, I 
should say you had/ It's been ad- 
vertised too much. It's wicked to 
advertise a book like that, as if it 
was a common, old best-seller. Why, 
it's pearls before swine to make peo- 
ple buy that book who can't appre- 
ciate it. 

Why, a lady come in here only this 
morning, an' says she, "Have you got 
•The Little White Speckled BiY-d'?" 

I gave her one look an' sized her 
up, an' I said, "I guess you mean 
'The Speckled Bird' without the 
white, ma'am," an' I give her that. 
You don't know that book? Well, 
I guess you can live through that. 
It's by Augusta Evans Wilson, and 
it's a kind of a second hatchin', that 
bird is. Why, Miss Evans, she used 
to write love stories when my mother 
was livin' em. 

But "The Little White Bird," oh, 
it's great! 

iSo sensible, and yet highfalutin, 
too, with Mr. Barrie himself stickin' 
out everywhere between the chinks. 

You want to see some funny 
books? Yes, sir, we've got them. 
The two funniest are "Observations of 
Mr. Dooley" and "Confessions of a 
Wife." Of course, you know what 
the Dooley books are, and this one 
is right up in line with the rest. 

But that "Confessions of a Wife" 
— my, I nearly died laughin' over it. 
It's a kind of an aquarelle — ain't 
that a salt water study? — for the 
woman weeps on every page, and 
twice on some. Between weeps she 
kisses any old clothes that come 
handy, and then she sits down and 
makes out in her diary a kind of a 
trained nurse chart of her symptoms 
— mental, immoral and physical. Not 
meant to be funny? N-no, I s'pose 
not, but it is all the same. 

Does your lady like child books? 
I don't mean Juvenile books, you 
know, but stories for grown-ups. 



Ansten such a lot. Of oonrse, she's 
got a touch, and she's fine and quaint, 
but it's all in the style. I must say I 
like sonie interest in the plot, too. 

Oh, you'll take Jane Austen, eh? 
And you'll take "Mrs. Wiggs," too? 
Yes. I thought you would. Every- 
body does. I'm sure your lady'U like 
it first-rate. Have 'em sent? All 
right. Good morning, sir; good 
morning. 

Now, ain't it queer there's such 
a few different kinds • of ladies 
in the world? Readin' ladies, I 
mean. I know that lady of his as 
well as if she was my own sister, 
and yet I've never laid eyes on her 
and never expect to. She's just this 
way: 

She'll like "Mrs. Wiggs" an awful 
lot, but she'll pretend she doesn't; 
and she'll just hate to read Jane 
Austen, but she'll tell everybody she 
"simply adores her." Carolyn WelU. 

Taste. 

^HB weakness of the 
indictment which 
accuses the popular taste 
in art of being decadent > 
lies in the fact of there 
never having been a popu- 
lar taste in art. 

There has been a popular willingness 
to be bored in the name of art, which, 
in an age of commercial art, passes 
easily for artistic taste. 

If this be decadent, who but the 
fakirs will regret it ? 



written over the kids' shoulders. 

You don't know what I mean? 
Well, the best of them are by Ken- 
neth Grahame and Miss Daskam, but 
they haven't had a whack at it this 
year. 

There are others, though, and 
"Emmy Lou," by Mrs. Martin, and 
"In the Morning Glow," by Roy 
Rolfe Gilson, are pretty good imi- 
tations. Most folks like "Emmy 
Lou" a heap. I must say she don't 
quite suit me, but it isn't her fault. 
She's a dear little girl, and if that 
Miss Daskam had written about her, 
she'd have been all right. But her 
author didn't know her very well, 
and, of course, that shows in the 
book. 

But, my goodness! if you want a 
hummer, get Kipling's "Just-So 
Stories." I don't believe there's any- 
body that wouldn't like that book. 
There's just one Kipling, isn't there? 
The story in that book about the 
Cat Who Walked by Himself is 
worth the whole price of admission. 
I've read it till I know it by heart. 
I guess Mr. Kipling must have been 
a cat once. But then he must have 
been a soldier, and a sailor, and a 
woman, and a ship, and a locomotive, 
and a wireless telegraph, too. 

You think your lady wouldn't care 
for that book? Well, of course you 
know more'n I do about that. 

Here's a set of Jane Austen. She's 
the great fad this year. Queer how 
fads come, isn't it? Now, nobody 
knows why, but all 
of a sudden every- 
body must read Jane 
Austen or they're not 
in it at all. Why, 
more'n half the ladies 
who fly in here and 
ask for Jane Austen 
think she's a historic- 
al novel, like "Janice 
Meredith," and 
they're so surprised 
to find she's half a 
dozen books. They 
buy the set, of course, 
but they go out look- 
ing as if they had a 
fearful big stunt ^^- <^««y •* tis, xb frimos; awh this dat, fkbrooart tub twiktt- 

ahead to read them ""*^"^» iiviHTiiH hckdrbd ahd thortt-two, was bar-rn gborok 

' VA8HIMOTOK, WHO APTHBRWARD8 BBOAXB TBB FATHBR AT THB COUHTHRY 

Me, I don't like Jane that obt bix birth. 





LIFE 



155 




IN PROPORTION. 

"OB, HO. IT'« ROT THAT I'M SO rORD OW rOBBIOH TBAVBL, BUT YOU KNOW BUBOn aAKBS lUCk A SOOD BACKSBODMO rOB OHC" 




Copsfrfght. 1903, 69 Life PublUUltg Co. 



ADVICi 

FOLLOW YOUR CARD UPSTAIRS AXD F 




•=s^^- 



> BORES. 

»UT WHAT THEY REALLY THINK OF YOU. 



158 



LIFE 




-r-nrm-r 



DRAMA! ,. 






'^/Jl 





A Clever Comedy by an American. 

R. AUGUSTUS THOMAS has desigted from drama- 
tizing the States of the Union long enough to write 
a comedy which contains laughable complications 
sufficient to equip a round dozen of French farces. 
Unlike the French farces which the Theatrical Trust 
delighted in importing, ** The Earl of Pawtucket '* is 
' absolutely free from indelicacy, and, notwithstand- 
ing, keeps its audiences in a continuous peal of laughter. It 
would be impossible to detail its plot, even if it were fair to our 
readers to do so. It concerns itself with the blunders and mis- 
adventures of an English Earl, who, with the laudable intention of 
winning an American girl on his own merits and not by the allure- 
ments of his title, assumes to be an American, and unfortunately 
borrows the name of the very man whom the object of his 
affections had lately divorced. With this 'as a motive Mr. 
Thomas has managed to load his three acts with more clever lines 
and more good, clean, wholesome fun than have been seen ori a 
New York stage for a long time. One could wish Mr. Thomai^ 
more prolific and that his dramatic output was greater, but perhai>» 
he has chosen the better part in wishing to write good plays rather 
than many plays. He, his audiences, and his actors are not losers 
by the fact that he has not joined the school of dramatists who Q.t^ 
able to turn out a thousand plays in a thousand hours. 

" The Earl of Pawtucket" is the means of bringing to more 
pronounced notice Mr. Lawrance D'Orsay, who will be re- 
membered as The King in * ' A Royal Family." Mr. D'Orsay is 
a very heavy swell of the dragoon order. His style is im- 
passive, but finished and deliberate. He has been likened 
to the late E. A. Sothem, but he possesses none of that 
great comedian's vivacity, and, so far as can be judged, 
none of his versatility. But Mr. D'Orsay 's measure has 
been carefully taken by Mr. Thomas, and the part of the 
chivalrous and well-bred but rather stupid Earl fits him 
perfectly. Elizabeth Tyree plays Harriet Fordyce, the , 
young woman who, from the very start, has penetrated Lord 
Onrdin^ton's flimsy make-believe, and has. lots of fun with 
him and the other characters who are not so clever as she. 
The part suits her personality admirably, and she appears 
to much better advantage than in any of her recent under- 
takings. With the exception of Louise Sydmeth, who im- 
personates HarrieVs strenuous maiden aunt, and Mr. Elton 
as the typical English valet, WiXkins^ the cast is commonplace. 
'* The Earl of Pawtucket " is a most diverting play, and 
its quiet fun is a most refreshing relief from the horse-play 
and buffoonery of the musical comedians who have inun- 
dated the theatres. 



Philadelphia, February 6, 1903. 

TO THE Editob of Life : Will you kindly tell me why 
your dramatic critic almost always eives the male 
actors the courtesy of the '* Mr.," and usually speaks of the 
women of the stage by their first names without any title 
whatever 7 Are not actresses entitled to as much respect as 
actors? A r. 



Surely. But the reason is a simple one. The names are neces- 
sarily taken from the programme. Ordinarily no titles are given, 
but it is quite safe to give any man the title of '' Mr." With the 
ladies of the stage it would be rather a risky proceeding to add 
either " Miss " or *' Mrs.," without reliable information as to which 
was correct. When the programmes supply this information, Life 
is very glad indeed to accord to actresses the same courtesy it 
would to women in any other walk of life. MetoaJfe, 

LIFE'S CONFIDENTIAL GUIDE TO THE THEATRES. 

Academy qf ifu^.— "Florodora. »• Not partlcnlarl j well done. 

Belascc—'^the Darling of tbe Gods/' Remarkable production of a 
very strons play. 

£^M.— Marie CahUl In •' Nancy Brown. *' Notice later. 

Broadway.^'' The Sliver Slipper.'* Musical comedy. Handsomely 
mounted. 

{7a«im>.— ** The Chinese Honeymoon.** Musical comedy. Reasonably 
Interesting. 

Criterion.— ^•me% T. Powers in "The Jewel of Asia ** Notice later. 

Z>a/y v.— "Tbe Billionaire.*' Mosical comedy. Coarse. 

Oarden.—UT. Sothem In "If I Were Ring.*' Mr. McCarthy*s story 
of Franfois Villon. Well staged and well played. 

&arrk;A;.— Annie Russell in "Mice and Men.*' A pretty play prettily 
done. 

Herald Sguare.^**UT. Pickwick ** in musical guise. Better than the 
average. 

KnickerboeXer.— "Mr. Bluebeard.** Gorgeons and stupid. 

Manhattan.—hiLat week but one of •• Mary of Magdala.** Mrs. Ftske as 
Mary. Interesting. 

iVinc«««.- Amelia Bingham in " The Frisky Mrs. Johnson.*' Notice later. 

Savov.-Ur. Fitch's "The Girl with the Green Eyes.'* WeU acted. 
Afternoons, "The Uttle Princess." Charming. 

Fictorid.— Blanche Walsh in " Resurrection.'* Notice later. 

WaUaek^t.--** The Sultan of SqIu." Musical comedy. The best of 
the lot. 

Weber and Fields*e,^Bnr\f9qne and yandeyille. Philanthropic specu- 
lators will part with good seats for a sufficient oonsideratton. 




The Manager: bulltI we'll bavb bsal hobsm. ▲ bbalbbook, bbal bihi 

AND OlESl, AND BSAL HAT. 

The Author: and would tou xihd havino real actobs, roof 



LIFE 



I5» 



of^P'.^ 




LIFE'S FASHION PLATES. 

AN ENGLISH MAN OF LITTSBS AT HOMK. OOSTUXK BT FOOLK. 



I«0 



LIFE- 




Peace With Honor. 

^HE Kaiser and John 
Bull were at table 
aboard the impe- 
rial yacht; the lack- 
eys and other 
nobility had re- 
tired to the pantries; and 
but for the Scotch and 
'Ml stogies they were alone. 
Juhn's face wore an expression of 
melancholy, almost righteous in- 
dignation, as he sipped a glass and murmured, ** Billy, this 
is all right ; Scotch is great stuff.'* ** It's the best substi- 
tute for laughing gas your island has invented," said the 
Kaiser. *'But let the Scotch go and get round to the 
Dago, to Oastro and Venezuela. Ton 're up to something, 
John. What's your game ? " " Billy, ' ' replied John with 
emotion, "you are queering me; you are acting lik^ a 
barbarian right in front of Sam's house. Tour conduct is 
an affront to Anglo-Saxon civilization and I can't stand 
for it." 

" John," said the Kaiser slowly, " you have more nerve — 
off a battlefield — than any one I know. I bombard a 
measly fort and the Yankees kick, and at once you get 
yellow and want to scuttle. Yesterday you were slaying 
Boers, murdering women and children, burning farms and 
destroying harvests, while our friend Sam supplied the 
mules, horses, canned grub and other agencies of civiliza- 
tion ; and you call me a barbarian. John I You are the 
limit ; Ananias and Peck- 
sniff were amateurs beside 
you." 

** William, my child, 
when will you learn sense 
and business?" retorted 
Mr. Bull pityingly. "De- 
stroying little republics 
and annexing their golden 
territories are advancing 
Christian civilization; suc- 
cess sanctifies your work ; 
and a division of the 
profits engenders interna- 
tional sympathy. There is 
nothing in Castro now but 
a chance for a row with 
Sam ; since he is rich and 
belligerent trouble with 
him would be barbarous. 
Nothing is so shocking to 
Christian sentiment and 
enlightened civilization as 
going up against a big- 
fisted government, which 
may lick you and make 
you pay the bills. Every 
instinct of religion and 
kinship makes war with 



Sam abhorrent to me in 1903 ; in 1808 it was different ; he 
was then in the Transvaal class and robbing him was 
pleasant and profitable." 

*' I am beginning to understand," the Kaiser said feebly. 
* * The virtue of your warlike efforts increases with the weak- 
ness, helplessness and potential richness of the victim." 

"Exactly," answered John promptly. "The mailed 
hand for the weak, the mailed letter for the strong ; hot 
shot for the small, hot air for the big. Observe Sam and 
me. Sam is strong and vain and easily buttered. I have 
no earthly rights in Alaska, but I need a slice of it for my 
fur-lined relations. I make a big claim by mail and preach 
kinship, peace and righteousness, and suggest arbitration. 
Sam gets mad, puzzled, and dazed ; but when his vanity is 
tickled, he consents. Always arbitrate, Billy, with the big 
ones. It costs nothing, and, right or wrong, you get some- 
thing. I couldn't fight Sam, but I can give him hot air 
and swindle him ; he's dead easy. Now, in Venezuela, we 
can get nothing but custom receipts, and there's nothing 
in them unless we make the Dagos use a bell punch. Ergo, 
Billy, we pull out and settle for two dollars and fifty cents 
on the dollar— out of regard for our dear Samuel. Are you 
on? Civilization is vindicated, peace triumphs, Anglo- 
Saxon ideas to the fore, America fooled and delighted, you 
and I ahead of the game, and our reputation for fair 
play made. Billy, let us pull up stakes for Christianity, 
civilization and the unearned increment." 

The Kaiser sat up, his imperial face suffused with pleas- 
ure and admiration, and he shouted joyously: "John, 
you're a wizard ; it's a go. Pass the chloro— the Scotch, 
and let us drink to Peace with Honor." Joseph Smith, 




Old Man Washington : i tell tou, vexohbob, that obobok of mine u pbbcooious. 

A MEBB CHILD, PBACTISIHO IN ADVANCE FOB OB088INO TBB DELAWABE. 



JJJBT LOOK AT HIM, 



LIFE 



M 




Timid Lover : tour parents sikx to hays qottbn ovbb thkib dislike roB m b. 

'*TE8. WHEN WK FIRST XBT THBT WBRB APRAID IT MIGHT LEAD TO 80XBTHIM0.'' 



LIFE 



\%!!p')f>V)M}k\^ 




THE PSYCHICS OF INDIQESTIBLE8 



("Dreams consist of recollections of the com- 
bined Impressions received and workings of the 
physical and astral minds. The soul and sub- 
consciousness are independently active, and It is the 
confusion arising from the confounding of the 
thoughts of the soul with the exaggerated interpret- 
ation of Impressions received by subconsciousness 
which makes It so often Impossible to remember 
dreams." — C. W. Leadbeater, in his theosophical . 
lecture.) 

O gentle reader, when you eat 

The pie so rich and light, 
It clinches with your astral self 

And holds it In the night ; 
And when you think you have a dream 

That fills you with distress, 
It is the psychic pie at work 
On your subconsciousness. 

The lobster salad lures you on 

Until you yield and eat ; 
And then the giddy nightmare comes, 

And awesome shapes you meet. 
It Is the astral wave that sweeps 

Your dome parietal, 



And you behold the future with 
Your eye subliminal. 

The pudding, redolent of plum 

And cinnamon and spice, 
Is but an astral goblin that 

Tempts to another slice. 
You eat. and mystic midnight's hour 

Unbars the door of fate — 
All through the coming ages you. 

Unknowing, cerebrate. 

O let us lay us down to sleep. 

Well stocked with cakes and pies, 
Welsh rabbits, tripe, and Wienerwurst, 

And thus grow very wise. 
How often might we have foreseen 

The coming good or ill 
Had we not thwarted fortune with 
The pleasant pepsin pill ! 

— Chiaigo Tribune. 
The shrewdness of' one of the founders of a 
famous estate In Maine gave rise to many amusing 
stories, one of which has recently been retold. 

One day the man, who was a large lumber oper- 
ator, was superintending a crew which was break- 
ing up a log Jam in the river. Suddenly the spruce 



on which he was standing slipped. The lumberman 
dropped out of sight In the water, and the loss 
closed over him. 

The nearest Frenchman saw the accident. Hop- 
ping briskly over the slippery logs, he helped the 
"boss" to land. 

Nothing was said about the accident After an 
hour or so the Frenchman began to get anxious, be- 
cause the reward which he considered due was not 
forthcoming. He approached the lumberman and. 
pulling clumsily at his cap. stammered : 

** I see you fUl in, m^sleur, an* I ran qoeek to imU 
you out 'fore you drowned." 

"Prob'ly," snapped the lumberman, "prob'ly. If 
you'd been ^tending to business as you'd oughter, you 
wouldn't have seen me fall In!" — Youth*M Com- 
panion. 

Lord Russell once asked Mr. Hume: "Mr. 
Hume, what do you consider to be the object of 
legislation ?" 

"The greatest good of the greatest number." 

"And what do you consider the greatest num- 
ber?" 

"Number one," was Mr. Hume's reply. — CTreen 
Bag. 



Life Is for sale by all Newsdealers In Great Britain. The International News 
Company, Bream^s Balldln?, Chancery Lane, London, E. C, England, Aobntb. 



Established 1823. 

WILSON 
WHISKEY 

That's All I 



THE WILSON DISTILLING CO., 
Baltimore. Md. 



Hunter 
Whiskey 

sterling Quality 
Superb Flavor. 

Wa. Lahahak A Son, Balttmora, Hd. 



5kin Diseases 

Eczema, Salt Rhemn, Pimples, 
Ringworm, Itch, Ivy Poison, Acne 
or other skin troubles, can be 
promptly cured by 

Itydrozoiw 

Hydrozone is endorsed by leading 
physicians. It is absolutely harm- 
less, yet most powerful healing 
agent Hydrozone destroys para- 
sites which cause these diseases. 
Take no substitute and see that 
every bottle bears my signature. 
Tria.1 Size, 25 Cents. 
At J>tuggiBtB or by mall, from 



nnooi 

uaeii 



klet OB the Mttoaal treat* 
ittt ofdlMaMeaent n-wT^ 



NEW IMPORTATIONS. 

High Grade Linens. 

Fine French, Irish, Scotch and Dresden 

Satin Damask, Table Cloths and 

Napkins, Doylies, Centerpieces, 

Tray Cloths and Scarfs, 

Hemstitched Linen Sheets and 

Pillow Cases, 

Damask and Huckabuck Towels, 

Hand Embroidered Bed Spreads, 

Imported Dimity. Ariel and Satin 

Finished Bed Spreads. 

NEW YORK. 




BLACK. STARR a.ivd 
FR.OST. 

438 FIFTH AVE., NEW YORK. 

PRECIOUS 

STONES. 



^^ All you have guessed about 

iRf E life ineunnce may be wrong. 
MA%^ If you wish to know the truth, 
rSKY send for **How and Why," 
p^o V. issued by th^ 

Pbnn Mutual Lirs, 
ACE. fl21-8-5 Chestnut Street, 
Philadelphia. 



BROWN'S BroncMalTrocbes 



Sold In B0XB8 only, Aoold Imltathmm,, 
Signature of ^^C ^M^mm,/^ \ 



^nVAl L. L EfiRAim THrLAfESf~SUCCESS OF THE 

■^^ ■ ••■■ "■ kEliiniilllf ORIZA-PERFUMERY (Gxaad Prix Paris 190O) 



LIFE 




BLgyptian 
Deities 




DUNLOP 
HARTFORD «K 

I 1 Ix- ]L# S «lind foremost 
for u IV I form qumUty &fid tcrvice 







The only PITRB and COBRECT ARTIFICIAL 
MINERAli WATEUS sold in America to-day. 

CARBONIC, ARTIFICIAL VICHY, 
SELTERS, CLUB SODA, Etc., 

are also pnt up In bottles for out of town 
dellrery, and can be sent by freight or 
exDrem to any .part of the United States. 

*^""° CARLH.SGHULTZ 

TeL 142 Madison Sq. 480444 First Ave., N. T. 




RareOMN^oKns 

tjirifPintand finest collection on this continent, 
i^jiuL^riains the complete celebrated Hawlejr 
i-nlk'Mtlon. Fine catalogue (free> containins 
dJ /■><- eimile labels in colors and Biographiesof 
II M the noted makers. Listand particnlars of 
H^j 1 » i nstroments from ffiO to $10,000. Monthly 
[Kij m snts may be arranged. Violins sent on 
f><i3\t-n days examination. Formal certificate 
rif I rMoaineness with each instrument. 

LYON & HEALY, ''^iSS^ 




The club 

are the original bottled Cocktails. 
Years of experience have made 
them THB PERFECT COCKTAILS 
that thev are. Do not be lured 
Into buying some imitation. The 
ORIGINAL of anything Is good 
enough. When others are offered 
it is for the purpose of larger prof- 
Its. Insist upon having the CLUB 
COCKTAILS, and take np other. 

G. F. HEUBLEIN & BRO., SoU Prv^rietPrt 

29 Broadway, Nkw York, N. Y. 

Hartford, Conn. LoNDOXf 




Pure 

Habana 

Segars— 

Always 

Mild 

And 

Aromatic 



MaLde in the oId-f«L8hioned honest 
way of Pure H&baLn«L Tobacco 
delightfully blended 



Look for tl\e Bull 
Dog on eek.cl\ Box 



J*>Kn W. MerriaLiTv & Co. 

The R.oycroft SegaLr Shop, which 
is "At the Sign of the Bull Dog" 

NEW YORK 



LIFE- 



r^— OoR. fboUSH 




Uncle C^ari^eq ; Hoys, how can you DL»^oclAte 
with that DlDkss hoy? I understftod he's the worst 
i^rhoLar Jo the schcml. 

WiiAJxi Htih! If H WHan*t for htm me or 
Tommy *ud he at the foot of the rlasa. — Chicago 
Bail]/ NeicE. 

For coQTBiiienco. renUy puperlof hotel terrico 
for select patronage, and tltmate. there Is nothing 
for New Yorkers quite like Lakewood, New Jersey. 

LAtrnEL'iN-THt^ Pines. 

The danger of cariTlnK an arerument to Its logi- 
cal cQUcLuelon la tbus set forth: They were at a 

"Flngera were mafle l^fore forks/' she lau^bad 
ms she betped her.self tn democratic fashion, 

"Yes," he admitted, "and people were made be- 
fore cJothea." gbe hastily reached for a forltK — 
Chiva^o Pott. 

HOTEL VEh^DOME, BOSTON, 
All the attractlecLR of hotel life, with the com- 
forts and privacy of faemcr 

DocToa: Have you heard of Mr, Blank's de^th? 
Frisnd ; No. Are you sure he' a dead? 
"PosltlTe. I treated him myself." — Chicago 
Daily Netoa. 

In the midst of historical places — interesting 
history — Old Point Comfort, Va. Quick trip — per- 
fect rest. Go to-morrow. Might as well. 

She; You certainly wouldn't marry a girl for 
her money, would you? 

He : Of course not. Neither would I have the 
heart to let her become an old maid merely because 
she had money. — Chicago Daily Jfetoa. 

CALIFORNIA IN LESS THAN THREE DAYS 
VIA Chicago and North-Western. Union Pacific, and 
Southern Pacific Railways from Chicago. The elec- 
tric-lighted "Overland Limited" provides the best 
of everything. Diversity of routes; finest scenery. 
Compartment observation cars, buffet-library cars 
(with barber and bath) ; dining cars. All agents 
sell tickets via this route. 

. Thb physicians were holding a consultation be- 
side the cot of the man supposed to have appendi- 
citis concealed about his person. 

"I believe," said one of the surgeons, "that we 
should wait and let him get stronger before cutting 
into him." 

Before the other prospective operators could re- 
ply the patient turned his head and remarked 
feebly : 

"What do you take me for — a cheese ?"— Balti- 
more American. 

Prkpari the system to endure summer heat by forti- 
fying with Abbott's, the Ortginal Angoetora Bitters. 

Nell: There is nothing more delightful than 
the knowledge that a man is in love with you. 

Bess : Oh, I don't know. What's the matter 
with the knowledge that two or three men are in 
love with you? — Chicago Daily Netoa. 

Aftkr a test of forty years connoissears pronounce it 
the best ; Cook'a Imperial Extra Dry Champagne. 

Mrs. Smith: We missed you so much at our 
party ! 

Mrs. Jones : And I was so vexed when I couldn't 
come! You see, our cook had company unexpect- 
edly, and she needed us to fill out the card tables. 

Detroit Journal. 




MORTON TRUST COMPANY 



38 Nassau Street, New York 
Capiui, . $2t000,000 

Surplus and DDdlTlded ProOts, $5,815,982 

OFFICERS: 
LEVI P. NORTON, President 

THOMAS P. RYAN. Vice-President 

JAMES K. G0RBrERB,2d Vics-Prest. 
H. H. FRANCIS. Secretarn 

0. L. WILMBRDINQ. Asst. SM^retaru 

H. B. BERRY, Trust Officer 

EXECUTIVE COMMITTEE: 
Levi P. Morron Joseph C. Hendiix 

Thomas F. Ryao James N. Jairie 

Bdward J. Berwind Geonre Poster Peabody 
G. G. Haven Jacob H. Scbiff 

William C. Whitney 



WASSERMANN BROTHERS 



STOCK BROKERS 

40 EXCHANGE PUCE, NEW YORK 

Memben of New York Stock Exchange 



BRANCH OFFICES: 

758 Fifth Avenue (Plasa Bank). 

Windsor Arcade, oomer 46th St. and &th Ave. 

Aster Court ( Waldorf-Astoria Ilotell. 

Imperial Ilotel. 

5 West 96th St., opposite Martinis Besteorant. 

Fifth Avenne HoteL 




Sest Line to Cincinnati and St. Louis-- New York Central. 



LIFE 




Chartreuse 

— QRBBN AND YELLOW— 



THIS LIQUEUR TAKES PRECB« 
DBNCB AT ALL FIRST-CLASS 
HOTELS AND CAPES AS INCOM. 
PARABLY THE HIGHEST-GRADE 
CORDIAL—THE ONLY ONE 
MADE BY THE CARTHUSIAN 
MONKS OP THE GRANDE CHAR- 
TREUSE, GRENOBLE, PRANCE. 
NO APTBR-DINNBR CORDIAL 
EQUALS XT IN QUALITY AND 
PLAVOR. 

At flntclaMWIne Mercluintt,Groeeft.HoCe]s,CBfte. 

Batjer & Co.. 45 Broadway^ New VorkTw. Y., 

Sole Agedts for United States. 



Magnetic Throat 

AN» 

Lung Shields 

OR 

Protectors. 

Ton make a mistake when yon bny any other 
throat or chest covering. Ton make another 
when yon leave onrs off snmmer or winter, 
that is, if yon have any throat or Inng tronble 
of any form or natnre whatsoever. Don't wait 
a minnte. Invest a penny at once to inqnire 
what this advertisement means. We guarantee 
the investment to pay yon a per cent, profit 
beyond all calcnlatiou. One cent invested will 
brin^r yon a scientific explanation ; it will bring 
yon the most convincing book of testimonials 
ever gathered from grateful patrons. Finally, 
it 'Will bring us your order, and that will bring 
yon something dearer than pearls of great 
price. Dr. Thacher will give personal attention 
to all describing their case. 

THE THACHER MAGNETIC SHIELD' CO., Ltd., 
103 StaU and Adams 8tt.. Chicago, III. 



Importations for 1902 of 

Go Ha MUMM & Co/s 
Extra Dry 

were 407,304 bottles 
more than any other brand* 

The Famous 1898 Vjntaqe of Mumm's Extra 

Dry, now arriving, is destined to make 

a still more emphatic increase. 




'TWAS EVER THUS. 

8ki: IF I HAD KNOWN THAT TOO HAD SUCH A HOSBID 
TXM PBB, I WOULD NKTBR HATB MARBIBD TOO. 

Be : HBAYBNS I WHY DOBS TBB TRUTH ALWATS A&- 
RIVI TOO LATB TO BB ANT GOOD TO A FBLLOW? 

~PicJt-Jfe-Z ». 



THE CITY OP NEW YORK, 
DEPARTMENT OF TAXES AND A&SESSMENTS, 
MAIN OFFICE. BOROUGH OF MANHATTAN. 
NO. 280 BROADWAY, STJiWART BUILJ>ING, 
January 12. liM)3. 
NOTICE IS HEREBY GIVEN, AS REQUIRED 
by the Greater New York Charter, that the books 
called "The Annual Record of the Asseased Valuation 
of Real and Personal Estate of the Boroughs of Man- 
hattan. The Bronx, Brooklyn. Queens and Richmond, 
comprising The City of New York," will be open for 
examination and correction on the second Monday of 
January, and will remain open uatil the 
1ST DAY OF APRILS 1908. 
During the time that the books are open to public 
inspection, application may be made by any person 
or corporation claiming to be aggrieved by the as- 
sessed valuation of real or personal estate to have the 
«ame corrected. 

In the Borough of Manhattan, at the main office of 
the Department of Taxes and Assessments, No. 280 
Broadway. 

In the Borough of The Bronx, at the office of the 
Department, Municipal Building. One Hundred and 
Seventy-seventh Street and Third Avenue. 

In the Borough of Brooklyn, at the office of the De- 
partment, Municipal Building. 

In the Borough of Queens, at the office of the De- 
partment. Hackett Building. Jackson Avenue and 
Fifth Street, Long Island Oty. 

In the Borough of Richmond, at the office of the 
Department, Masonic Building. Stapleton. 

Corporations in all the Boroughs must make appli- 
cation only at the main office In the Borough of Man- 
hattan. 

Applications in relation to the assessed valuation of 
personal estate must be made by the person assessed 
at the office of the Department In the Borough where 
such person resides, and In the case of a non-resident 
carrying on business in The City of New York, at 
the office of the Department of the Borough where sych 
place of business is located between the hours of 10 
A. M. and 2 P. M., except on Saturday, when all ap- 
plications must be made between 10 A. M. and 12 
noon. JAMES J J WELLS. President, 

WILLIAM S. COGSWELL, 
GEORGE J. GILLESPIE. 
SAMUEL STRASBOURGER. 
RUFUS L. SCOTT, 
Commtosloners of Taxes and Assessments. 



Th«*re's & striking diffe^ronce b«riw«p«Nn ordi^ 
nary At« and the deliclaus blendlnA ot the 
fragT&nt Ko^ ootit&lti«4 in overy bottle of 




There vou flncl ale in Its best &nd 
mos t en Jc^y able form* T h e d If te re n c e 
l& net alene In the ftigredlents— 
there's the bre\«rJfig nand Dottllng a» 



Itr JUAUnER MOW "^ 

JAMAICA:- 



WINTER 
Va4;«tloa Trips 



din nillllt ' af LbQ A tln^ J.I nr S^rvift- * 
ShUAitA, Ktit of lilt WEST rWDit*, h^i^y^ *^li 
miiU'n irtTanUrol s^t-M-ry. ejrwnrint botf^l-t i >ne 
WA.V, ^Oi rutin. 1 triji, &7r.. f"'rulj»G of 2?i c|aj'«, 

with itifjifnnvi^r^ aiiTT. 
TO JAMAICA, CfiLDMIIAjMICAftAfiVA.GDSTA IICA 
Apply to BUBrftC-JlSifRHllN WHt, PppL 0, 3^7 
Flrfiinlway, Koiv Turk; 1o^Run4k>]T)li !*l., ClilcaicPf 
lgii >, Rrt*iMlway, 8t. ]x>i|]i5 ^ If £8 Walnut J^t., 

Oillft>rrir4 BL, SkiJi Pmnt'l&M ] 11 a 
K»irll(l &\v,. i']ev(iliti][S, t>. 




Scotch 
Whiskies 

JOHN HOPKINS & CO. 

GLASGOW AND tONOON 

**Glen Garry'* 



a£H OMSK 




Am 
"Navy Liqueur^* 



"Ihe beM Scotch 
wbr&kr«&, tlie 
laveriteA of 
COanetsseurSi/' 



IkKikffft of ill] uLir MfHies 
AHiii u|>ots rectuMi. 



C. H- ARMOID St CO. 

AftlMS FOR LL S. 

27 South WIHiflm SL 

NLW YORK 



LIFE 




THS CAKB WALK FROM A PARISIAN POINT OF TISW. 



'•Journal Amutant. 



In California To-day 

Perfect June weather, no big coal bills. When 
you go there, travel on the California 
Limited: for seven seasons the choice of 
travelers who require perfection of service. 

Ladies will be pleased with the cosy compartment Pullmans and 
sunny observation parlor. In latter are fashion journals, monthly 
magazines, sutionery and a library. In buffet-smoking car gentlemen 
will find daily market reports, latest newspapers and an expert barber. 
Opportunity for a neighborly chat or smoke. 

The six o'clock dinner — Harvey's best— is a social delight. 
The tables are resplendent with cut glass and silver. Electricity fur- 
nishes a rich flood of light. Every delicacy on the menu. 

Chicago and Kansas Ciiy to Los Angeles, San Diego and San 
Francisco. Books about California tour and Grand Canyon of Arizona. 

Atchison, Topeka & £> a VT^ GmmtaI Pmm 

s-ffiry. Santa Fe •^ 



DOMINION LINE toEUROPE 



Boston to Qmostown and 




FaiatTvvic-w:ttw Steamers 
Commoiiwev^ltli^ 1 3,000 ion 
Ne»' l£iltEt»<i^» 11^44»0 tolls 
nbaaa, . 10,000 lou* 

HlvrloD, » li^QS^tonn 
DITERRAMEAM SERVICE 

adrla. ^^n^\ for lUiis^ir^U^ Book lei. 
DOIMINION LINE 

11:^ Bmoilwtj, - ^Ew IVilk 





^ CIG ARETTO 

A JTAra>ARD or '"'""^"^'^ 

CXCCLLCNCE INS1JRPA55ED 



KitchenUtensils 

riAVIMG TKtS 

TRADEMARK 



NO POISON 

Hai Ever B«en Found ta 
the Snamel of 

Agate Nickel- 
Steel Wafc. 

The BLUE LABEL 

P rotected byDeeMoAof 
United Stetea Ooart* pMted 
oo«T«i3r pteea» 

PROVES IT. 

If mlMMtatea •!« offered. 

write uik New Booklet Free. 

Agmte Nickel-Steel Ware te aeld 

by the leedli« UepertmcMt 

JUI£ SAFCfe. aad Boasefoniehliv Stofeik 

Leluce & Oro^Jean Mfft. Oo.. New York, BoiIob. Chloacoi 




Tour to 

California. 

Under the PersorutUy-Condaded System 
of the PennsythanU Railroad. 

The second Pennsylvania Railroad Personally- 
conducted Tour to California for the present sea- 
son will leave New York and Philadelphia on the 
Golden Gate Special, February 19, f^oing via Cin- 
cinnati, New Orleans, San Antonio and El Paso 
to Los Ang^eles and San Dieg^o. Three davs wUl 
be spent in New Orleans, during: the Mardi-Gras 
festivities. Should a sufficient number of passen- 
gers desire to travel under the care of a Tourist 
Agent and Chaperon, a delightful month's itin- 
erary in California has been outlined ; and a re- 
turning itinerary to leave San Francisco March 
38, visiting Salt Lake City, Glenwood and Colo- 
rado Springs and Denver, arriving in New York 
April 6. Kate, $275 from all points on the Penn- 
sylvania Railroad east of Pittsburg, covering all 
expenses of railroad transportation, side trips in 
California, and berth and meals going on the spe- 
cial train. No hotel expenses in California are 
included. Tickets are good for return within 
nine months, but returning cover transportation 
only. For detailed itinerary apply to Ticket 
Agents, or address Geo. W. Boyd, Assistant Gen- 
eral Passenger Agent, Broad Street SUtion, Phila- 
delphia, Pa. 



LIFE 



Life and Accident Insurance. 

531 



ANNUAL STATEMENT 



(.Condcnacd.) 



Insurance Gompctnif, 

HARTFORD, CONN. 



MORGAN G. BULKELEY, President. 

Assets, Jan. 1, 1903, . $08,493,546.78 

Premium receipts in 1902, . 10,^24,200.98 
Interest receipts in 1902, . 2,592,589.16 

Total receipts inl902. . . 12,816,800.09 
Payments to Policy holders in 

1902 6,868,099.76 

Leffal Reserve, on Policies, and 

ai claims 55,879,111.68 

Special Reserve in addition to 

Reserve above ffiven, . 2,118,988.00 

Gaaranlee Fana in excess of 

Beqairements bj Com- 

panj*8 Standard, . . 5,500,501.05 
Guarantee Fund in excess of 

Legal Reqairements, . 7,694,484.05 
Life Insurance issued and re- 
vised in 1902, . . 80,489,888.00 
Life Insurance in force Jan. 1, 

1903 218,762,977.00 

Accident Insurance in force 

Jan. 1, 1908, . 199,550,204.00 

Paid Policy bolders since orgaitzatlon, 

$132,383,973.96 

MOWRY 6i PATTERSON, Managers, 
No. 49 Cedar Street, New York. 

W. A. NICOLAY, Manager, 
Mechanics' Bank Building, Brooklyn. 

STERLING, FRENCH & STERLING, 

Managers, 

Accident Department. 

JAS. R. PITCHER, Manager, 

Liability Department. 
Continental Building, New York; 



A decieion has been banded down by tbe United States 
Circoit Court of Appeals for tne Seventh Circuit, affirm- 
ing the decree of the United States Circuit Court, which 
granted to Dr J. O. B. Siegert & Sons, the exclusive 
right to the use of the v ord "Angostura" in connection 
with bitters. The decree in question conuins the fol- 
lowing passage : 

Th« court farther finds that tbe said word "Angostum" is a 
tnule maiic, good and ralid in law, and that tbe us^ of saf d 
word by the complalnaata and their prtdiicesBors sine 9 the 
date of its adoption, as aforesaid, has been contmaoos for 
OTPr fifty years, and thnt the complainants are now In fact 
and in law the owners Uiereof, and hare tne exclnslTe rteht 
to use the sam* as a trade mark for and in connection with 
tiia sale of hitters. 




GO mOHT TO CARRMGE HEADQUARTERS 

Write to-day for ota illustrated catalogue (free) which describes our goods truthfully, 
explains our method and our guarantee and makes it safe, simple and easy for you to 
get cazriages, harness and horse accessories direct from our factory at wholesale prices. 

THE COLUMBUS CARRIAGE wiB HARNESS COMPANY. 
Factory and General Oflice, Columbus, 0. Western Office A Dlstributtng House, 8t Louis, Mo. 

Write to nearest offlosu 



WATER 




ondon dcrrij 

LITHIA*^ 




A friend 
in need is a 
friend in- 
deed. There is 
nothing like the clear, 
sparkling, absorbent, 
Lomtonderry to drive 
poisonous secretions 
from the bodv^ no mat- 
ter whether they are 
itihcriledor the result 
of o ve r - ) n d u Igen cies. 
Try it if you hare rheu- 
matic or gouty aches. 



Guaranty Trust Co. of New York 

MUTUAL LIFE BUILDING, NASSAU, CORNER CEDAR STREETT. 

LONDON OFFICES 83 IX)BfBARD STREET, E. C. 60 ST. JAMES STREET. S. W. 

Fiscal Agents of the United States Government. Manila, Philippine Islands ; Hong Kong, China. 

Depository of the Government of the Philippine 'Islands, Manila. 

Capital, $2,000,000. 
Surplus aid Uadlvided Profits, $5,369,000. 

INTERKST ALLOWED ON DEPOSITS subject to cheqne or on certtflcate. 
Acts as Trustee for Corporations. Firms and Individuals: and as Guardian. 
Executor and Administrator: Takes entire chanreof Real aud Personal 

Estates ; carefully selected securities offered for investment 

TRAVELERS* LETTERS OP CREDIT available In all parts of tbe world. 

COmniERCIAL LETTERS OP CREDIT ISSUED. 

DRAFTS on all parts of Great Britain. France, Germany, China, and Philippines BOUGHT and SOLD. 

WALTER G. OARMAN, President. ADRIAN ISELIN. JR , Vice President. 

GEORGE R TURNBULL. 3d Vlce-Prest. HENRY A. MURRAY. 3d Vice-President 

WM. C. EDWARDS, Treasurer. JOHN GAULT. Manaaer Forelim Department. 

E. C. UEBBARD, Secretary. F. 0. HARRIMAN, Assistant Treasurer. 

R. C. NEWTON, Trust omcer. 



George F. Baker. 
George S. Bowdoin. 
AQgnst Belmont, 
Frederic Cromwell, 
Walter R. Gillette, 
G. G. Haven. 
E. H. Hamman. 

London CommUfeet 



DIRECTORS: 
R. Somers Hayes. 
Charles R. Henderson. 
Adrian Iselln.jr.. 
Augustus D. Juilllard, 
James N. Jarvle. 
Richard A. McCurdy, 
Levi P. Morton,. 
ARTHUR J. FRASER, ChaUman; DONALD C. HALDEMAN. 



Alexander E. Orr. 
Walter G. Oaltman, 
Henry H. Rogers. 
H. McK. Twombly, 
Frederick W. Vanderl)tlt, 
Harry Payne Whitney. 



WE CLAIM THAT 



OLD CROW RYE 



H. B. KIRK 
& CO.. N. Y. 



IS BEST-BECAUSE 

It is sold straight. It brings the distiller far more price 

than any other made in the United States. 
It is hand made, sour mash, and has the best reputation. 
Our Scotch Whiskies are true Glenlivets ; are sold straight. 
1 he Souvenir is old. 
The Bonnie Brier Bush is very old. 
Compare them with any others. 



F8bn»r7 10. 1903 



©MMT 





THE SALES OF a A ■ ■ * 

^ CHAUPACNC ^ 



IN TUC YEAR 1902 WERE 



W 



3,733,744 

BOTTLES, A EIGURC NEVER REACHED 
BY ANY OT HERCHAMP AGNE HOUSE. 

THLINCRCJISE IN THE UNITED STJITES TOR 1902 OVER 1901 M% 

367.116 

B0TTLES.J1 RECORD NEVER BEFORE J!TTi!INED 
IN THE HISTOBY OF THE CHjJMPilGNE TRJIDE IN 
THIS COUNTRY.RjIRKING JlN JIDYHNCE EQUJlL TO 

PER CENT 

CREilTER TH>1N THE COMBINED INCREASE 
or ^LL THE OTHER CH^MRflCNE HOUSESr 

Extmct, Benforfi Win^ ahU Spirit Ortt^r^JmnuAtyl&t iWl. 

THESE NOTEWORTHY STATISTICS SHOW A FtTTINQ 
TRiBUTC ENDORSING THE^a#^ p 




OlT^Hl^ 



SEAL 



CCPYRiQHTep /9o5^ 



CHAMPAGNE OT; ' 
Geo. A. Kessler & Ck>. 



VOLUME XLI. 



NEW YORK, FEBRUARY 26, 1 903. NUMBEftyfOS I 

Entered at tbe New York Post Office as Second-Class Mail Matter. / 

UopjrigUt. league LiryrrmditfiijsQ Cosf pant. 




FLOmOA 
THK HM,p >V.\VK THAT NEAKLY KILLED THE ORANGE BLOSSOMS. 



LIFE 



UNOCR THC ACT OW 18«1. 



i:^!k^: 



THE DELINEATOR 



FOR MARCH 



Social Life of the Army and Navy 

Waldon Ptwcett In an article in The Dsliheator for March ilo- 
scribes at length the social life of the army and navy, Mrith il^uiiini^ 
tiocs, showing well-known officers and their wiyes, and Bcene« aud 
events familiar to the men of the army and navy, including in>pab' 
lished photograubs of Mr«. Roosevelt and Miss Alice Rooeeveltn 

The army and navy conrtitute a distinctive element of Am^Tican 
society, and the wive« and daughters of the officers, whether from 
the homage due to arms or on account of their personal attraotion^i 
everywhere elicit attention and admiration. Their lives, howtver. 
are not altogether enviable ; In the navy separations are loui? nnd 
frequent, and in both branches of the service there is the p\vt 
present danger of death or injury to loved ont^. 

CONCERNING AFTERNOON TEAS 

The afternoon tea is a favorite mode of entertaining. It is thp bt*l 
method of keeping in touch with one's lliends. a^ \»ell as to intro- 
duce a vbitmg friend to one's general acquaintance ; and it 1* uIpd 
I he accepted faiihion for the presentation of a daughter. A few 
special pointa in regard to this function are given in the Slaffb 
Delineator, touching upon the manner and form of invltationp^, 
the duties of hostess, assistants and guests, and minor matters. 

*' JusC get Th4 IkHneatory 

15 cenU per copy. Sold by all Nev\ sdeaiers 
and Butterick Agents. Send $1.00 now and 
gel The Delimeatuu for an enUre year. 

THE DELINEATOR, 17 West 13th Street, New York 



Spring styles and Millinery 

Tho March Tiunii>er of Tkp Dkli^skator e^ve* mvir new 
sue;[;e^tioQH rof shirt wiiii!^t v&Hheloiia nnd pWi^tni; morftfA for 
aklrtu tliftl flt smoolh alwiuT ttu- hipw aiifl flaj-uit Hit Imltmin 

For many dn-acy mill IntTr cruatSnni the Mur<~b nuiuber of THE 
DeufeaTiir iM3i]«arpjiKsed. The iiw of flni^t'n* wl^h (limy lulle. 
]uf*f rtr (^hlffnn in daltn_v ijul rpt'aiions ure di-MTiTjc-d and tliystXAfi-rl 
in luany culor?^- 

CORRECTNESS IN STATIONERY 

A fe*luw of rtiu March l»Ki-i?itiATf»|| tH mliitplny fif fj«^tiMF[i*ble 
pttttllontry, showing varlou* ^hfti»t*w nf euvelu|je4 atj4 rlieeis^ ami e%* 
ample* <jr oddns*" lii^adlniic and crL*le. >lnurolug horfiern, a^* well 
as the quail tv aird col' if t^t patH'^ *t* rvferHMi in, unci airont^tlirr it W 
an liirfrecimu paiTP. Thlf- i^ a euhj^Mrt of the grcate^i impi)rl*iir<' Irt 
ihcw* whovToqld hc'com-tl in social innMcr* in tlid cinftl"y of l^ht^ir 
dtaticmery, i int' \*<- Jiidp-d armdor as much by the ffiTtrfiftl ftf i^HiiranCt' 
of AlelirriiS hv thecontvnti4, ami in ibii reirafii. us ifi all orher^ 
portaliiint! to Ihr uvngcti of poUt»- aof/k-ly, their nn-f friain prc^criHtMi 

For fMhioni In etatloQcry— " Jwl gtf I7f« D^Hneaiurr 

I Scents fn?T cnpy. ?^M by all Xi-wstleitkt« 
and Bpttertck Aeeiitj!. ,«knd §tm rnt\v and 
gei Tni I)ELi\EATr>n fur ati riiliro >i,TUr» 

THE DEUNE^TOIt, 17 West Bth Street, New York 



Life Insurance 

Free from All 

Speculative 

Features. 



The 



Travelers 
Insurance 
Company 

Hartford, Conn. 

President 



Accident Insurance 

Otdefit, Larg*est 
and Strongtest 

Accident Company 

in the World. 



IVriie to The 

Travelers Insurance 
Company 

tlartford, Conii^ 

or the Agent in yr^ur vitinity. 

Therer are some 

Eye Openers 

in Accident Insurance Policies 
Jusi placed on the markrl by 

The Travelers Insurance Co, 

They arc something new, and 
there is tioihmg now offered that 
can touch ihem in LIBERAL- 
ITY, in INCREASED HENE- 
FITS, in SIMPLICITY. 

And the f^ame old tircurity 
grown larger, that make*? TlIK 
TRAVEL LRS' contracts the 
nv^'St widely popular among 
snlid business and professional 
meni is behind them. 



A RATTLING GOOD STORY 



THE 



cc 



PICAROONS 



By GELETT BVRGESS and WILL IRWIN 



99 



This is honestly, one of the smoothest and richest things 
that ever happened* It is a gingery, ^ coast '^ story and quite 
strong enough to make you forget many things you don't 
want to remember. 

READ IT 

IN PEARSON'S 



10 CENTS 



ALL NEWSDEALERS 



PEARSON PVBUSHING CO., Aster PUoe. Now York City 



LIFE 





A WXL1.-KN0WN judge, who Is as famous for his 
wit as for his corpulency, was much disturbed in 
mind by his tendency to ever-Increasing stoutness. 
He tried many remedies, but without any success. 
At length a friend suggested that he should Uke a 
coarse of treatment at certain hot springs. He 
immediately set out for the place, sojourned for a 
few weeks at it, managed to get rid of a good deal 
of his superfluous flesh, and returned home in a 
most happy and jocular frame of mind. 

On the flrst morning after his return, when he 
was wending his way to the court house, he came to 
the butcher's shop where his family were supplied 
with meat. Marching inside, he said: 

"Cut me off twenty pounds of pork." 

The butcher sharpened his knife and at once 
complied. The judge looked at the meat for a min- 
ute or two and then walked off. 

"Shall I send the pork to your house, my lord?" 
inquired the butcher, who felt that the judge had 
overlooked instructions. 

"Oh, no," was the reply, given with a smile, 
"I don't want It- I have fallen off just twenty 
pounds, and I only wanted to have an idea of how 
much it was!" — Exchange. 

If your friend Is poBsesaed ofun artistic taste and rather 
hard to please, you will save yourself time and trouble by 
sending to Curtis and Cameron, of Boston, for a catalogue 
of the Copley TrinU. A portrait of Winston Cbarchins 
daaghter, entitled 'Little Miss Cburchlll,** by Mrs. Kenyon 
Cox, and a cbaracterlstic picture called **The Siesta/' by 
Gaugengigl, the Melssonnier of America, are among tbe 
latest and moat beautiful reprodactionB, and either or both 
woQid make a most acceptable gift, or would further 
adorn your own walls. 



Jif\')H')f^^H 



An amusing street Incident happened recently. 
A young lady left her husband's side to look in a 
window. On leaving it she took, as she thought, her 
husband's arm, and continued her conversation. 

"You see," she said, "you don't even look at 
anything I want you to see. You never care how 
I am dressed. You no longer love me. Why, you 
have not even kissed me for a week, and " 

"Madam, I am sorry ; but that is my misfortune, 
not my fault," said the man, turning round. — Ex- 
change. 

My brother-in-law was also an inveterate and 
clever story-teller, and of course occasionally made 
a slip, as, for' instance, on a railway journey to 
Brighton once, when he found himself alone with a 
stranger. The stranger in conversation happened 
to ask my relative, casually, if he were fond of 
traveling. 

"Traveling? I should rather think so," he re- 
plied, airily; and, imagining he was impressing 
someone who was "something in the city," he con- 
tinued, "Yes, sir, I'm a pretty experienced traveler. 
Been mostly round the world and all that kind of 
thing, you know, and had my share of adventures, 
I can tell you!" 

After a bit he gained more confldence and 
launched into details, giving the stranger the benefit 
of his experience. "Why, sir, you read in books 
that hunters of big game, such as tigers, watch 
their eyes. Not a bit of it. What you have got to 
do is to watch the tail. That's the thing ! It mes- 
merizes the animal, so to speak, and you have him 
at your mercy." 

On arriving at the hotel he found that hi3 
traveling companion had just signed his name in the 



Tlsltors' book. It was Richard F. Burton, one of 
the greatest travelers of the age! My brother-ln- . 
law hastened to apologize to Sir Richard for his 
absurd tales. He had no idea, of course, to whom 
he was retailing his yams. 

Burton laughed. "My dear sir, not a word, 
please. I was more entertained than I can tell 
you. You really might have traveled — you lie so 
well."'— J/orry Fumiss't *' Oanfetrtom of a Cariea- 

The monkey lost his hold and fell Into the 
crocodile's waiting jaws. Even then his wits did 
not desert him. "I just dropped in for dinner," he 
said, with an engaging smil^. — Yale Record, 

In Kentucky : With all its faults, I love the " 
still. — Cornell Widow. 

WANT 7,200,000 BOTTLES. 

A deal has Just been clo-ed by William Lanaban & 
Son, Baliimoru, Md., proprietors of Hunter Baltimore 
Rye, awardini; a Pittsburg concern the contract for fur- 
nishing &0.0OJ grofs of bottles during tbe year 190a. 
There are t* be t>hipped fifty grors per day, and no less 
than three car loads per week It will require 156 cars 
to carry the produrt from Pittsburg to Baltimore, or 
four ordinary freight traius. 

Each hot le it* twelve inches long. There will be 
7.200.000 botileit. uhieb, if placed end to end, would 
make a line of bottles about l.fiOO roilvs long. Assuming 
that thtre are an average of thirty-lwo drinks to the 
bottle the order will have a capacity of 280,400,000 
diinkc, or about three drinks for every person in the 
Unit(*d States In all there wUl bo a capacity of 1,440,000 
gallous in the 7.2 0.000 bottles. The above speaks vol- 
umes for the |«opularity of Uuuter Baltimore Rye. 




The first-class, round- 
trip rate, Chicago to Cali- 
fornia, is $110. Tickets 
are good to return any time 
within nine months. Stop- 
overs are allowed. One 
stop-over, that is distinctly- 
worth while, is at El Paso — to get 
glimpse of Old Mexico. 

The train to take to California is 
the 

Golden State Limited 

via the El Paso-Rock Island route. 

Newest, finest, and most luxuriously 
equipped train across the continent. 

Less than three days Chicago to Los Angeles. 

Thro' cars to Santa Barbara and San Francisco. 

Electric lights; electric fans; barber shop; 

bath room ; Booklovers' Library ; compartment and 
standard sleepers ; observation, dining and library cars. 

Cut out this ad and mail it. with name and address, to 
this office, and beautifully illustrated book about Cali- 
fornia will be sent free. Write or call for further 
information. 

Jno. Sebastian, P.T.M., Chicago, III. 




VIRGINIA HOT SPRINGS 

2,900 Feet ElevatiM MaKsificeat MoflMtaia Sorroaiidiaga Opes All Um Year 



Reach^ by the 



Chesapeake & Ohio Railway 



^o^j^^^HbB^^ 



INCOMPARABLE SPRING, SUMMER AND FALL CLIMATE 

Luxurious baths and most curative waters known for rheumatism, gout, obesity 
and nervous troubles. New golf club house with squash court, lounging rooms, 
caf^, p\Ti^ P^ugi etc. Fine golf hnks, teonis courts, pleasure pool, excellent 
livery and ail outdoor pastimes. 

Ne^v Homestead and Cottages. -The hotel is a brick structure of the 
highest class, completed iu September, 1902, contaioiog 400 rooms and 200 
private biths. Long distance 'phone in each room. Broker's office with direct 
New York wire. 

Pullman compartment car from New York via Washington and the Chesapeake 
and Otiio Railway. The F. F. V. Limited, leaving New York 4:55 P. M., 
arrives Hot Springs 7:25 A. M. Excursion tickets at C. & O. offices, 362 
Broadway, New York, and offices Pennsylvania R. R. and connecting linc^ 
throughout the country. For hotel information, address 

FRED. STERRY, Manager, Hot Springs, Bath Co., Va. 



LIFE 



VAli NORD£N 
TRUST COMPANY 

751 FIFTH AVENUE.NEAR 58^-- STREET 
NEW YORK 

Capital and Surplus, $2,000,000 



No. 21 

The services of the Trust Department are offered to de- 
positors. Wills in which the Company is designated as 
Executor or Trustee are drawn and kept without charge. 
Familiarity with probating wills and managing estates en- 
ables the Trust Company to act promptly and efficiently 
with the least possible expense to legatees. 



OFFICERS 
Warner M. Van Norden, Presidtnt Arthur King Wood, Stc'y and Trtasurtr 

William F. Havemeyer, Vict'tresident William W. Robinson, Ai^t Treaturtr 

Morton C. Nichols, Vict-Preudtnt James B. Haig, Jr., Ass*t Trtasurer 



TRUST DEPARTMENT 



Kdward S. Avery 



Trutt Officer 



Warner Van Norden 
Warner M. Van Norden 
William F. Havemeyer 
John H Flagler 
James Talcott 
Hoit. Cornelius N. Bliss 
Jolin Claflin 



DIRECTORS 

Dumonc Clarke 
Henry F. Shoemaker 
Benjamin Perkins 
Richard L. Edwards 
John H. Washburn 
Jonathan B. Correy 



Thomas P. Fowler 
Ernst llialmann 
Charles W. Morse 
Mahlon D. Thatcher 
Henry H. Cook 
Henry T. Hrunson 
Arthur A. Fowler 



IS2'^ A.D. 



^i- 



WffS I 



2 2 
GOLD MEDALS 



LONDON 166Z 
PHIIADQPHIA 18% 
VIENNA 1873 
CHICAGO l£93 

LONDON lase 

BUFFALO 1901 

PARIS 1867 

)B7& 1900 



IDTflES 

The Worlds Best Tonic 
Imported from Trinidad swi 



By Hoj&] Warrant Purveyors to His 

Majesty the German Emperor mod 

the King^ of Prussia. 
Un rival Jed appciizinijf tonic and i>tamach 
corrective. Rccom mended by phyddans. 
Docs not contain Angostura bark or other 
powerful of harmful drugSi such as iire 
often founii in douii^stic subsiitutcs iind 
imitations, Manulactured only by Dr. J. 
G, B. Stegert & Soni, Triaidad, B. \V. L 

J- W- WUPPERMANN, Sole Agent, 
NEW YORK, n, Y. 



OOD money m^km need some coa- 
servative method of investing i put 
of their gains to protect the rest. 
Successful men are just the cuts \o 
carry the most Life Insurance. The Prudentiars 
Guaranteed Five Per. Cent. Gold Bond is especially 
attractive as a means of investment. Write for 
particulars. 



The 
Prudential 

Insurance Com- 
pany of America 

Dept. O 



JOHN F. DRYDEN. President. HOME OFFICE. Newuk. N. ]. 




^e(^^*- 




BARTON & GUESTIER 

BORDEAUX 

Established jy2^ 

Fine Clarets, Sauternes, and Copac Vicrge 

Messrs. Barton & Guestier have all 
their Wines bottled at their own cellars, 
their specialty being to select the finest 
vintages only. 




THE U. S. BY 




REPRESENTED IN > E. LAMONTAGNE & SONS 



45 Beaver St, New York 




'^^^- '^'Ju / 



f-',^. I'. ' < 



^^''"^i:}rA., ^^ 



N 

•'A 




UFB 



A Ballade of Lent. 






^ HE daysof pennnce are at hand; 
Haidcus aud men are nobly bent 
On self-denial, duly planned 
According to the rules of Lent. 
Away wiih idle merriment — 
Dinners aud dances, cards and 
plays I 
We p!ay the pious penitent — 
But only for the Forty Days. 



Flirtation by Jeannette is banned ; 

My mood is likewise reverent ; 
To church I go, at her command. 

And iiear the sermon, eloquent 

Of deeds undone and time misspent ; 
We vow relorm ; and who shall raise 

The question if it's |)ermanent, 
Or only for the Forty 

Days? 

While sel f-denial rules the 
land,* 

The world of fashion muit invi^nt 
Amusements of a harmlesn brund— 

Pastimes to suit the innocent ; 

The sins we love must now Ihj blent 
With piety — for Fashion pa>?i 

Profound regard to precedt'nt — 
But only for the Forty Dayn. 

Satan, you grumbler, be conteTit ! 
Though we renounce you nud your 
ways, 
And think it proper to repeni, 
It's only for the Forty Hays! 
Frank Roe Batc?iehitf\ 

To Myrtilla. 

J^T^IS Lent, and yet in party j^o^vii 
-■- You linger onward at the dutic^e. 

'Tis Lent ; deserted is the town . 
Ah I is your lingering a change ? 

Or do you flout at churchly wtiyii — 
Refuse to do as you are bid 7 — 

Howe'er it be, I feel just now 
Not half so pious as I did. 



LENTEN VERSES. 

A Lenten Letter. 

Li^OR forty days imprisoned in the ark 
•^ Sailed Noah solitary on the sea 

Without so much as one rock or a tree 
Or star whereby his proper course to mark. 
In torrents fell the rain. Did he but hark 
He heard the waters laughing in their 

glee. 
How lonely was that voyaging, ah, me ! 
How desolate, how dreary and how dark ! 

For forty days I, too, a prisoner 
Must taste of loneliness, for this is Lent, 

And I in vain look fotth for one I love. 

Go, then, white letter and make search 
for Her, 
And, like the messenger that Noah sent. 

Be yours to find the olive branch, my Dove I 




The Song of a Sermon. 

A DAM and Eye and the Apple, 
-^^ Garden aud Serpent and Tree, - 
Such is the sermon at Chapel 

Preached to Myrtilla and me : 
Back to the very Beginning, 

Back to the Parents of yore, 
Goes the good man — ^to the sinning, 

Clear to the worm at the core. 

Stale is the fabulous story, 

Dull is the clerical prose. 
Even the sequel of glory 

Fails to keep me from a doze : 
There is a garden more recent 

Only ten minutes away, — 
This is my dream, and a decent 

Sort of a dream for the day. 

Love's little Eden ! It covers 
Less than an acre — a spot 
An>pl43 enough for two lovers 
When all the world is forgot : 
I^ve'a are the apples that grow there. 

Not interdicted is one ; 
Bo with Myrtilla 1*11 go there 
A Hit the sermon is done. 

Felix Carmen, 



Meeds of Femininity. 

*' "y ES, ladies,** announced the physical 
-*- culCTirist, "you "will be surprised 
at the miracles my system can work. It 
can incrf a8R your shoulder measurement 
feevenii iuehea, add to your stature and 

p-ace, |?ive yon " 

*'Cur," interrupts a fair pupil, ''our 
dressmnkerj^ can do all that for us in no 
time- Whut we "want to know is how to 
get a 334nfh waist into a 16-inch corset, and 
a No. 5 frwit into a No. 2 shoe, without tak- 
ing e 111 an ►farm.** 



" TSTOBLESSE OBLIGE " applies still— 
■^^ to collars and cuffs. 



172 



LIFE 




•• WhiU there is Life there's Hope:' 

VOL. XLl. FEB. 26, 1908. No. 1061. 

l» WwT Thirtt-First St.. N»w York. 



Published evenr Thoraday. t&OO a year In ad 
Taooe. Postacre to foreign conntrtes in the Postal 
Union, I1.U4 a year extra, {(insle current copies, 
10 cents. Back nombers, after tnree months from 
date of pablication. 26 cents. 

No contribution will be returned unless 
accompanied by stamped and addressed 
envelope. 

The illustrations in Life are copyrighted^ 
and are not to be reproduced. 

Prompt notification should be sent by sub- 
scribers of any change of address. 



spoke, of outcries from the South 
"against what is called President 
Rooseyelt's policy of appointing ne- 
groes to office," when under former 
Presidents more were appointed and 
nothing was said. He felt that the 
new question of what to do for the 
negroes is one that challenges our best 
thought and patriotism. 




TN his speech at the 
"^ Union League 
Club dinner Secre- 
t a r y 
Roo t 
^ men- 
tioned 
three 
out of 



many con- 
^ temporary 
problems 
which held with- 
in them possi- 
bilities of grea^ 
evil to the country . 
One was coming from the tendency 
towards division and jealousy between 
the rich and the poor; another was 
growing out of the propensity of labor 
unions to check individual develop- 
ment ; the third was a consequence of 
the failure of the plan devised after 
the Civil War for the uplifting of the 
Southern negroes. The last of these 
problems has been widely discussed 
since Mr. Root spoke of it. The admis- 
sion of one of the foremost representa- 
tives of the administration that the 
experiment in negro suffrage had 
failed has been exceedingly interesting 
to the country. **The suffrage,** said 
Mr. Root, **ha8 been taken away from 
the black man in most of the States 
where he composes the larger part of 
the population. It is only a question 
of a short time when the blacks will 
be excluded from all the offices in the 
Southern States.** The first plan had 
failed, he said, but our responsibility 
for the welfare of the blacks remained. 
He did not suggest any new plan. He 





OO it does ; so it does. But after all, 
^ to what extent has the first plan 
to help the negro failed? Negro suf- 
frage has failed in a measure. It is not 
abolished anywhere, but it is restricted, 
and the operation of the restrictions is 
in the hands of the whites. The South 
doesn*t want negroes in office, and 
there are likely to be very few negro 
officeholders while the South con- 
tinues of its present mind. But uni- 
versal negro suffrage was based, not 
on exx)erience, but on hope. So long 
as it was effectual it made for lament- 
able mlBgovernment. It gave political 
power to the unfit, and it failed pri- 
marily because of the unfitness of the 
new voters. It led to government 
by a combination of the unscrupu- 
lous and the incompetent, and it 
gave no promise, immediate, or even 
reasonably remote, of yielding better 
results. The collapse of so futile a 
plan hardly constitutes failure. It is 
fairer to look upon it as a step in 
progress. The negro was not equal to 
tasks and privileges to which he had 
not been trained, but he has advanced. 
The Southern blacks, as a whole, are 
doing better than any lot of negroes 
equally numerous in the world. They 
are earning more money, getting more 
education, and acquiring more prop- 
erty than negroes elsewhere. Universal 
negro suffrage never did the mass of 
the negroes any good ; the loss of it 
will not do them harm. So long as 
they have education, industrial train- 
ing, and protection in their personal 
and property rights, the doors of prog- 
ress are not closed to them. 




counseled men of their race to keep 
out of politics. It is possible that 
life, liberty and the pursuit of happi- 
ness may be better secured to the 
Southern negro under the new suffrage 
plan than under the old. A cause of con- 
tention has been minimized. Increased 
responsibility has been placed upon 
the whites. A New Orleans judge, 
charging a grand jury last month in 
Louisiana, said to them : *' The white 
people of this State now exercise all 
of the powers of government. To say 
that the courts and the laws are in- 
adequate to the punishment of the 
negro when he deserves punishment, 
and to his protection when he is en- 
titled to protection, is to confess that 
our race is incapable of administering 
the government.** Talk of that sort 
is encouraging. The South cannot be 
made a good country for white people 
without making it a good country for 
negroes also. The best Southern white 
people know that, and upon them 
more than anyone else — except the 
negroes themselves— the future of the 
Southern negroes depends. 




'^HB wisest negro leaders, headed 
by Booker Washington, have long 



TTTITH the best intentions towards 
^' the white population of the 
South, President Roosevelt has failed 
to give it satisfaction. He backed the 
Postmaster-Gfeneral in resenting the 
treatment of the colored postmistress 
of Indianola, he appointed Dr. Crum 
Collector of the Port of Charleston, 
and he followed precedent in inviting 
to a White House reception the Regis- 
ter of the Treasury and the Recorder 
of Deeds. Also he sat at dinner with 
Booker Washington : that has not been 
forgotten. The South complains that 
the President has forced the race 
question, but it is the South that has 
forced it, not he. He has met, not 
made, the situation. It is one that 
calls for fill the wisdom of the ser- 
pent, and all the harmlessness of the 
dove. It is hard in the North to make 
anything like a fight for the negroes 
which will not do them more harm 
than good, and yet the North would 
be ill-content with a President who 
was not solicitous to discover and per- 
form his full duty in their behalf. 



LIFE 




OBpyrffM. ftOS, ftf U/» FuUUMh^ Co. 



The PerHsterU SuUor (detperaUly) : this is thi la«t timk i shall bt»b ask tou to be mt 

" OH, THIS IB so BUDDBN I ** 



Schedule for an Up-to-Date 
New Yorker. 



8:00 -if; 



Jump out of bed. 

Bath and shaye. 
Dressed. 
Bound downstairs to break- 



8:08. 

8:10. 
fast. 

8:15. Bolt breakfast and read head- 
lines. Say "yes *' and •* no " to wife 
4 or 5 times. 

8:21. Sprint to Elevated. 

8:26. Wait one minnte for train, 
and swear at delay. 

8:50. Bush into office. Dock three 
clerks for being 8 minutes behind. 

9HX) to 12:S0. Do a great business. 



Telephone 8 times, write 400 letters, 
see 10 men. 

12:84. Hurry to restaurant. 

12:86. After waiting nearly 50 
seconds to get waited on, cram down a 
sandwich, a piece of pie, and a cup of 
hot coffee. Time wasted in doing so, 1 
minute and 80 seconds. 

12:42. Back at office. 

12:50 to 6:00. More business. Tele- 
phone 12 times, see 18 men, answer 4 
telegrams, and write 150 more letters. 

6:15. Rush to Elevated to get Ex- 
press. See it coming in distance and 
jump up 4 steps at a time. Last man 
in. 



6:45. Run upstairs to room. Strip 
off business clothes in 8 minutes. Pull 
on evening clothes in 8 minutes more. 

6:52. Fume because dinner is 2 
minutes late. 

6:54. One hour at dinner. Awful 
bore. Fidget all the time. Guests. 

7:58. Smoke. 

8KX). Theatre. Leave wife at second 
act to go to Club. 

9:40. Hearts at Club. 
10:15. Hearts too slow. Change to 
Bridge. 

1 2 KX). Home and meet wife on stairs. 
Kiss her good night and jump into bed. 
Dead to the world. 



)74 



•LIFE 




ANEW volume of reminiscences, by 
the author of The Martyrdom of 
an Empress, beara the title of A Doffed 
Coronet, Its five hundred pages of engag- 
ing gossip are written in a most entertain- 
ing style, and range from pictures of events 
and characters on the diplomatic stage in 
Egypt after the Arabi Pasha rebellion to 
the author's adventures during an American 
exile, necessitated by financial disaster. 
(Harper and Brothers. $2.25.) 

Mr. A. J. Dawson has achieved remark- 
able results in his story of Morocco, called 
Hiddm Manna, It is a real story of real 
Morocco, gathered bit by bit at the gates of 
strange cities and in the bazaars where 
news and gossip are bought and sold. To 
write it the author has first become a Moor, 
and his tale is saturated with the spirit of 
Islam. (A. 8. Barnes and Company. $1.50.) 

Professor George 8. Ooodspeed's History 
of th€ Babylonians and Assyrians contains 
an account of the work accomplished in the 
past fifty years by excavators and scholars, 
and an analysis and summary of the re- 
sults to date, M hit h will interest many who 
like to keep abreast of other work than 
their own, although they may not care to 
follow all the included intricacies of dynas- 
tial succession. (Charles Scribner's Sons. 
$1.25.) 

**The Man in the Street " Stories from TTie 



Kevo Tork Times have been issued in book 
form, and their humor is vouched for in an 
introduction by Chauncey Depew. TbiN ih 
a fearful handicap for a young book jns^t 
starting out in life, but there are so mrajy 
good stories in the collection that it 
should succeed in spite of it. (J. B. 
Ogilvie Publishing Company. __^ 
$1.00.) ^ 

George Gilbert's novel, In the 
Shadow of the Purple, is written 
with the avowed object of clearing 
the honor of Mrs. Fitzherbert, wife 
of George IV. This is rather a 
work of supererogation, as Mrs. 
Fitzherbert's honesty is acknowl- 
edged. The book, however, is 
fairly interesting. (R. F. Fenno 
and Company. $1.50. 

Isabel Loveirs Stories in Stone 
from the Honum Forum is one of 
the fifty-seven varieties of canned 
information now so freely supplied 
by the various publishers. These 
'* stories in stone'' are a rather per- 
functory compilation of Roman 
history and mythology with a de- 
cided tinny flavor. (The Macmil- 
lan Company. $1.50. 




A really beautiful volume, called 
The (iuest of tfie Holy Orail, contains a 
series of reproductions from Edwin Abbey's 
frieze in the Boston Public Library, and a 
sympathetic and charming interpretation 
and paraphrase of the holy legends by 
Ferris Greenslet. (Curtis and Cameron, 
Boston.) J, B, Kerfoot, 



LIFE'S FASHION PLATES. 
COURT COSTTlia FOB IfOlf'IIIUTABr AMERICAK AMBASSADOR. 

OTHER BOOKS R'CEIVED. 
JttkttCs Charge and Othn Poem*. By Fred 




Emerson Brooks. (Forbes and Company, Boston. 
$1.26.) 

Frederick Walker. By Clementina Black. (E. 
P. Datton and Company. 76c.) 

Citnid is King. A book of vnrses by Roy Par- 
rell Greene. (Richard D. B^ger, Boston.) 

ChrUtlan Sdefce, A comedy by M. H. ICan- 
gasartan. (M. M MangasarUn. Chicago.) 

Bomcking t hyffutt. By N.W. Bingham. (Heniy 
A. Diokerman and Son.) 

Zon* Sonnets (f an OJJU^ Boy- By 8. E. Klser. 
(Forbes and Company, Boston. 60c.) 

The Book of Weddinrrs By Mrs Barton Kings- 
land. An etiquette book lllusriated by pboto- 
Fraphic reproductions of floral and table decora- 
tions, vl^ubleday. Page and Company. $1.20.) 

How to MnH Runs, By Candace Wheeler. 
(Doubleday, Page and Company. $1.00.) 

MUliona*re» of America. A portfolio of clever 
carlcatares by Max Cramer de Ponrtales and C. 
de Fornaro. (The Medusa Publishing Company.) 

l>s HeT09 de Bomnn. An edition of Bolleau^a 
dlaliigue. witn introduction and notes by Thomas 
Frederick Crane. (Glnn and Company, Boston. 
76c.) 

Mozart A biography In the series npon master 
musicians, by E J. Breakspear. (E. P. Datton 
and Company. $1.25. » 

Translations from Old Enalish Poetry. Edited 
by Albert 8. (»ok and Chauncey fi. Tinker. 
(Glnn and Company, Boston.) 

A Treanv^y of Hvmaroius Poetry. Edited by 
Frederlo Lawrence Knowles. (Dana, Estes and 
Company, Boston.) 

Binffsof Smoke. By Geneva V. Woloott (The 
Electric Press, Wilmington, Delaware.) 

In Merry Mo^d. A book of verses by Nixon 
Waterman. (Forbes and Company, Boston. $1.25.) 

The Life and Bep^ntanre of Mary Magdalene. 
By Lewis Wager Reprinted with notes by Fred- 
eric Ives Carpenter from the original edition of 
1566. (The University of Chicago Press.) 

Clniitral Strainf. By Louis Alexander Rob- 
ertson. (A. M. Robertson, 8an Francisco. 76c.) 




* what's TOUB HURBTf" 

**I PBOMISBD MT HUSBAKD X WOULD MBXT HIX AT 0X1 O^CLOCK." 
** BUT IT'S OBLT TWO JTOW." 



He Was the Man, After All. 

** "Y^OU wiU not do ! " 

It was nearly eight o'clock in 
the front reception room of a Harlem 
flat. Two people sat alone in the 
shadows. In the distance could be 
heard the ramble of the great city. 
Something in the stem, forbidding 
aspect of the young girl's face, beauti- 
ful as it Was, seemed to fascinate the 
pale young man who faced her, so that 
he listened with parted lips, unable to 



reply to the full force of her elo- 
quence. 

" No," she continued, •* you will not 
do. While in a certain sense I respect 
the ability which has enabled you to 
ask me for my hand, there is some- 
thing in my nature that demands, nay, 
that cries oat for a hero. I must have 
a man to love me who has really suf- 
fered, and whose nature has thus been 
developed in the fire of actual experi- 
ence. I want a man who has, unaided, 
struggled with humanity, and who. 



175 

although at times suffocated with 
the contact of baser souls, has yet 
had the patience to fight on and 
never surrender, until his destina- 
tion has been reached. I want a 
man who, when the opportunity 
has presented itself, has not stopped 
to consider, but in spite of warning 
voices has jumped into the breach 
and held on with desperate resolve 
to win out ; a man who, if neces- 
sary, will push to the wall all others, 
and, right in the thick of the battle, 
will strike right and left until the 
palm of victory be his." 

"Then," said her companion, re- 
covering his composure swif tly,"my 
own darling, waste no time, for I 
am that very man. I have just 
successfully ridden up from Park 
Place in the Elevated." T, M. 

Question. 

rnHE chaplain of the Wisconsin 
"*- Senate broaches a delicate 
question when he suggests, in his 
morning prayer, that Senator 
Si>ooner would make a good Presi- 
dential candidate in 1908. 

That temperate and accurate theo- 
logian. Dr. Charles H. Parkhurst, 
used to say that the Aimighty 
could not maintain gold and silver 
money at a parity of value (either 
with or without the consent of 
other nations, presumably). 

Is it likely, then, that He is able 
to elect a President from a State 
which is in no sense pivotal? 

Of course, much depends on the 
attitude of the material interests. 




A STRONG BUSINESS PROPOSITION. 
*' MILLIONS IN IT." 



J7« 



LIFE 



ViU 



Ominous. 

^~\ MEN, an omen oft you see, 
^^ y But do not let one trouble you, 
Unless the omen chance to be 
Preceded by a W. 

In that case it is wo, men say, — 
Or women ; and the trick of them 

Is just to wait and have their way 
Until you take your pick of them. 

Felix Carmen* 

Harold and His Pa. 

^^"pA, what do yon do 
|\^ j^ -*- when yon are de- 
tained at the office 
at night?" 

"Why, I work 
very hard, of conrse. 
What do yon snp- 
poeeldo?" 

*'Well, I always 
thongh t yon 
worked too, nntil I 
heard mamma say 
that yon didn't." 
"Indeed I I -fon- 
der what yonr mamma 
knows abont it." 

•• She says she knows 
a great deal more than 
yon think she does." 
*' That's real nice of yonr mamma to 
say that. Tell me, Harold, what is 
her idea of the way I pass my eyen- 
ings when I am detained at the office ?* ' 
** Well, she says yon don't always do 
the same thing. Sometimes yon go to 
the clnb, sometimes yon go to the 
theatre, and sometimes yon play i)oker. 
Say, pa?" 
"Well, my boy." 
"What is poker?" 

" Poker, my son, is a game where 
yon sit at a table all the evening with 
a lot of other men to see who shall win 
the last ronnd of jack-pots." 

" What a fnnny name I What is a 
jack-pot?" 

"It's a thing to hold money. Yon 
see, one man opens it and then some 
one else takes the money." 

"Bnt, pa, why do yon sit all the 
evening to win the last ronnd ? Why 
don't yon play the last ronnd right 
away and win the money, and then 
come home to mamma?" 

" Because, my son, for two reasons : 
It isn't the mle of the game, and it 
isn't any fnn." 

" But don't yon ever get tired, pa ?" 




" No, my boy. If I stayed home with 
yonr mamma and read the evening 
paper alond, I shonld get very, very 
tired. Bnt I can sit np all night and 
play poker and not feel a bit tired.'* 

"Bnt suppose yon lose all yonr 
money— doesn't that make yon tired ?'* 

"Oh, yes, bnt I don't feel it nntil 
the next morning, when I awake ont 
of my trance." 

*' Trance I Why, pa, that is what 
they do at a spiritualistic meeting, 
isn't it?" 

" Yes. A game of poker is almost 
always accompanied by spirits, and 
every one of the players may go into a 
trance. It is often called a seance, to 
distinguish it from a prayer- meeting." 

"Dear me, pa, how much I am 
learning. Tell me some more. When 
yon lose all yonr money, who gets it?" 

" Oh, some one I play with.'* 

" Is he a friend of yours ?" 

"Certainly. He may be the best 
friend I have in the world." 

" Doesn't it make him feel funny to 
take yonr money away from you — 
especially when he is such a good 
friend?" 

" Why, yes — bnt if I didn't have the 
money he wouldn't be such a good 
friend. Besides, the next time I may 
get it all back." 

" Oh, I see. Then yon may not lose 
so much, after all.'* 

" Oh, no. At the end of a year I may 
come ont even — that is, if it wasn't for 
the kitty." 

" What ! Pa, yon don't mean to say 
yon have a pus^y cat I Is it a real, 
live kitty?" 

" Well, not exactly, Harold, bnt it is 
pretty active." 

" What does the kitty do ?" 

"It's the kitty's business to take 
part of the money all the time." 

"But what does the kitty do with 
the money?" 

" Oh, the kitty has a high old time ; 
buys all the cigars and other things 
for the crowd. The kitty keeps setting 
'em np all the time." 

"I am afraid, pa, I don't know 
much. What does setting 'em up 
mean?" 

"That means providing the happy 
medium, Harold. Yon know every 
spiritualistic meeting and every poker 
party must have a happy medium." 



" I see. Say, pa, will yon take me 
with yon some night?" 

"No, «>.'" 

"Bnt why not?" 

" Because it wouldn't be a fit plaoe 
to take a young boy like yon." 

" But if it's fit for you, why isn't it 
fit for me?" 

"Yon go and ask yonr mother, 
Harold. She knows so awful much, 
perhaps she can tell yon that also." 

Significant. 
n^HB great significance of the dis- 
covery of adrenalin is indicated 
in the announcement that a dog was 
made to live ten and one- half honrs 
with his head cut off, by means of this 
powerful restorative. 

One of the chief difficulties in vivi- 
section has always been the proneness 
of dogs and other animals to die with 
the pain and shock of having knives 
thrust into them. Nobody knows how 
many secrets of nature have eluded ns 
merely because of the vivisectionist 
having had to stop at the critical mo- 
ment and get another dog. 

Now that a dog may be kept alive 
upwards of ten hours with his head 
cut off, important results may be 
expected. 

Health Hints. 
TXT HEN a man is well, merely to 

* ^ live makes him glad. 

That is to say, if yon can't be glad 
except as yon are diverted by powerful 
appeals to the senses, yon are ill. 

Treatment? 

That depends. Some like serums, 
while others prefer to be operated on. 

Debuts. 

TXT HEN yon are introduced to the 
^ ' debutante, be very careful what 
yon say. 

"How is your liver? " is felicitous, 
but supererogatory. 

" Put it there I " does very well, pro- 
vided yon are very sure yon know jnst 
how high to shake hands. 

"Lovely weather we're having^" is 
always in order. 

"Do yon use Pears' soap?" is no 
longer deemed good form. 

If the debutante says she is glad to 
see yon, do not exclaim: "What a 
lovely liar you are I " Fulsome com- 
pliments are out of place. Simply go 
her one better by saying yon are glad 
to see her. 



LIFE 




177 



ify Dtar Sirs .*—! have used your Notoriety Tablets for years, usually taking 
ptje ufisr tvtty public dinner, and can vouch for them^nd all they claim. When- 
ever I feel any tE.'t)dency to lapse into silence, your Tablets always restore me to 
roy nurm&L con di Lion . By their use I have kept myself before the public for years 
on t^carcely any foundation at all. Gratefully yours, 

Chauneey Depew, 
Gtnllemirtt :— Three years ago I had given up all hope of ever attracting 
ftttention. I heard of your Tablets and immediately began their use. Now 
I iirji known wherever there is a barroom. Yours for health, 

Oarrie NcUion, 
pem' Sirs ;--Please send me at oivpe a barrel of your Notoriety 
T^b;ei4. For some time now I have discontinued their use, but I 
find that I cannot get along without them. Don't delay, as I am 
riij(td!y being forgotten. W. J, Bryan, 



Father KrdektHtodttr to Qwrge Washington: i*ll havb to ask 

TOU to XOVB out of TBS ITkT, PLBASK. 

Announcement 

OUR Notoriety Tablets have not been 
previously put upon the market, as 
the private demand for them has 
been more than equal to the 
supply. Our facilities, however, 
having been quadrupled,* we are 
offering them to a few patrons out- 
side of our regular customers. 
The following testimonials speak 
for themselves : 

Notoriety Tablet Co., 
Unlimited, 
Europe and the United States. 
For Sale at All Publishers and Lecture Bureaus. 
GenUemen ;— I began taking your Notoriety Tablets several years 
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your Tablets to all. HaU Caine, 

Dear Sirs :— Please publish this letter. Every little helps. You 
will see by this that your Notoriety Tablets have benefited me 
greatly. Before taking them I was modest and unassuming, and 
could not look a book reviewer in the face. Now I even take the 
Devil to Task when I can get myself noticed. I consider^ by the 
constant use of your Tablets, that I am permanently cured of any 
tendency to obscure myself. Marie OoreUi. 





■'••=:s 



^ 



-.\ 



/' 



Sense and Incense. 



C HE smokes I ** I beard the gossips 
•^ say; 

Of coarse they love to blab It, 
Discoursing In their pleasant way 

Upon the vlcioas habit : 
I wondered were It truth or lie, 

Of envy bom or malice, 
And though I listened to It, I 

Took it cum grano salU. 



What happened next I can*t forget : 

It chanced as we were parting 
I lit a Tarklsh cigarette, 

And, jQst as I was starting. 
Myrtllla gently drew me back 

As if I were a brother. 
Confessing, as she kissed me, "Jack, 

I wish you had another I " 

Felir Carmen. 




DISPG 

"CHBEB UP, JOHN. WE MAY HAV 
" IMI*08SIBLE. NINE-TEXTIIS OF TH 




I'LANET .OF OUR OWN BOMS DAY.' 
ARK OWNED BY THE TBUST NOW.' 




DISPOl 

" CHEER UP, JOHN. WE MAY HAVIi 
' IMPOSSIBLE. NIXE-TENTHS OF THt 




ESSED. 

PLANET .OF OUR OWN BOMS DAY." 
ARE OWNED BY THE TBUST NOW.'* 



ISO 



LIFE 




-TT 1 I r r 



IDRAMAI 



J = ^'K 




The Risqu6e Mrs. Johnson. 




N^ 



^O New York first-night andience 
thinks it has had its money's 
worth nnless, in addition to the 
entertainment itself, the author, 
or star, or some one else is goaded 
into making a speech. As a role 
the goading is not an arduous task, 
and on the first production of 
"The Frisky Mrs. Johnson," 
Amelia Bingham was quite ready 
and willing to oblige with a beau- 
tifully prepared and really amus- 
ing oration. She is her own 
manager, and showed that she 
assumes all the responsibilities of 
the i)osition by her self-possessed 
allusions to " my play," " fwy com- 
pany" and "fwy author." Inas- 
much as Mr. Clyde Pitch wrote or 
adapted " The Frisky Mrs. Johnson," 
and as Mr. Fitch has some thirty or 
forty other plays now playing in New York under other 
managements, this particular claim to ownership savors a 
little of bumptiousness. 

But taking Amelia Bingham's own claims to eminence 
as a manageress as founded more or less on fact, there 
crops up one very serious argument against her claim. A 
really clever manageress would have secured some one 
besides Amelia Bingham to play the title part. With her, 
temx)erament and avoirdupois are in the wrong ratio for 
friskiness. Had she more mind and less weight, more ex- 
pression and fewer curves and dimples, she might be frisky 
in the sense the author intends. Nowhere in the play is 
this more evident than in the scene where there is a quick 
exchange of very bright chaff between her, as Mrs, Johnson, 
and Jim Mm-ely (Mr. Lackaye). The rapid fire speeches 
could never have come from such a Mrs, Johnson, In real 
life such a woman would smile fatuously and try to look 
as though she understood, but anything like repartee would 
have been entirely foreign to her. It might also be urged 
by those who would deny Amelia Bingham's claims to 
greatness, that a cleverer manageress would have chosen 
some one besides Mr. Gtottschalk to represent Lord Bertie 
Umthcote, a young and conscienceless English nobleman 
who is " a deevil among the weemen " and the hero of any 
number of conquests. Whatever Mr. Gottschalk may be — 
and he is certainly a clever actor of eccentric parts— he is 
neither a hero nor a ** masher,*' and in the important r61e 



here assigned to him he is entirely out of the picture. A 
shake-up, which should introduce another and more spirit- 
uelle actress as the heroine, give Mr. Gk)ttschalk the ec- 
centric part of the French nobleman, Count Max Dindeau, 
and make Mr. Abingdon (now Frank Morely, the colorless, 
deceived husband) the Lord Bertif, wotdd be an improve- 
ment all around. Mr. Lackaye, although inclined to be 
stagey, gets inside of the individuality of the hero of the 
piece and carries with him the sympathy of the audience 
from start to finish. The rest of the cast will do. 

<*The Frisky Mrs. Johnson " reafitous the suspicion that 
Mr. Fitch is getting along towards the front door of the 
facilis descensus. It is adapted from the French, to be sure, 
and, therefore, he is not as responsible for its risque motive 
as he is for the last act of ** The Bird in the Cage," but 
both show that he is exhausting his material and that his 
imagination needs a rest. There is no law to prevent 
modem playwrights attempting to rival the Bard of Avon 
in the matter of productiveness, but they should remember 
that Shakespeares are not born every day. Also, that there 
was something besides mere speediness in the work of the 
author who wrote three inmiortal tragedies in one year. 
Mr. Fitch's friends and those who have hopes for an 
American school of dramatists have wished for Mr. Fitch*s 
advancement, but judging from the higher standards, his 
work this year seems to show advancement crab- wise. He 
has passed the pot-boiling stage, and it is no longer neces- 
sary for him to write simply to amuse. He is strong enough 
in the popular fancy to attempt to do something for more 
enduring fame. 

The defects of *< The Frisky Mrs. Johnson " do not de- 
stroy its diverting qualities if one half closes one's eyes. It 
is a fairly amusing evening's entertainment. Metcalfe, 

LIFE'S CONROENTIAL GUIDE TO THE THEATRES. 

Ac€uUmy qf Music.^The UDceasing **Florodon.'' Road oompany. 

B€laKO,^** The DarllDg of tbe Gods.'* The romance and tragedy of old 
Japan In Impreasiye stage form. 

i?(/0M.~Marie Cahlll In «* Nancy Brown.** Notice later. 

Broadway.— ImA week of *'The Sllyer Slipper.** Moslcal oomedy. 
Ayerage type. 

CaHno.^** The Chinese Honeymoon.** Musical comedy. Fairly fanny. 

CH/«ri4m.— James T. Powers in '*The Jewel of Asia.** Notice later. 

DalyU.—"' The Billionaire.*' Musical comedy. Adapted to the Tenderloin 
taste. 

Garden,— Ur. Sothem in " If I Were Ring.*' Plctnresqoe, poetto and 
well done. 

(^arH^Jfc.— Annie Russell in *'Mlce and Men.** Clean and amusing 
Uttle play. 

Herald Square.— ''Mr. Pickwick.** Diyertlng musical piece with Dick- 
ens*s work as a basis. 

Kniekerbocker.—"Ur. Bluebeard.*' Extrayaganza more elaborate than 
clever. 

Man/iattan.—hBMt week of "Mary of Magdala.** Well mounted and 
interesting. 

Princess.- AmeWsk Bingham In " The Frisky Mrs. Johnson.*' See above. 

.sv/fcw/.— Mr. Fitch's "The Girl with the Green Eyes." Sketchy but 
amusing. Afternoons, '*The Little Princess.'* Delightful play of child life. 

Tlc/oria.~Blanche Walsh in " Resurrection.'* Notice later. 

Wailack^s.—QeoTge Ade*s *'The Sultan of Sulu.'* Musical comedy. 
Clean, pretty and funny. 

Weber and Fields' s.-BuTletque and vaudeville. Charitable enterprise 
for the support of Indigent theatre-ticket Bpeculators. 



•LIFE- 



181 



IN VIEW OF rni P1IB8BNT AGITATION CONC2BNINO TRAFFIC IK NEW YORK, *' LIFE " REPRINTS BBREWITR, FROM 80M K OF ITS FORMER ISSUES, A FEW 
PICTURES BEARIWO ON A SUBJECT DEAR TO THE HEARTS OF ALL NEW YORKERS. 




THE NEW YORK STREET CAR. 
UNSAFE FOB OATTLB* BUT GOOD ENOUGH FOR HUMANS. 



**8TBP LIVELY, LADIES 1 THERE'S PLENTY OF BOOM INSIDE." 



The Worst Newspaper. 
"T^^HICH is the worst daily newspaper in the United 
^^ States, and why? 

LiIFb's Contest to decide this important question is begin- 
ning to attract wide attention. Every one is invited to 
compete, and no daily newspaper in the country, no matter 
how bad it is, need suffer by being left out. Remember, 
that a Prize of Fifty Dollars in Gold is offered for the 
cleverest contribution showing why any particular daily 
newspaper is the worst in the United States. 

OONDITTONS. 

Competltora mast limit their argcnnents to three htindred words each. 

Write OD one side of the paper only. 

Tne contest will close March 1, 1908, and the award will be made as 





MANY BECKON IN TaIN. 





soon thereafter as the respective merits of the arguments can be deter- 
mined. 

The winning argument will be printed, together with such others as 
may seem to Life worthy of that distinguished honor. 

Names and addresses of the writers should accompany all manuscripts. 
In no cote will thete be printed without permission of the gender. Those 
who desire their manuscripts returned should enclose a stamped and 
addressed return envelope. 

Each manuscript may bear a pseudonym, which will be printed with the 
argument. 

the Editors of Life are to bq the sole judges of the merits of the 
arguments. 

Number Eight. 

I am surprised that a handicap of forty-nine dollars and ninety- 
nine cents was not placed on the contestant selecting TJie Boston 
Herald as the worst newspaper ever. • 

The news zone of this paper is bounded on the north by the city 
limits ; on the east by Boston Harbor ; on the south by Thomas 
Lawson's stock farm ; on the west by the Harvard Pump. The 
Bonton Herald is the herald of Boston and nothing else. It never 
tires of its job. The front page is usually given to advertisements, 
a description of what a city reporter saw on his way to the office, 
and a picture of the new member of the School Board. 

The Herald has not yet recovered from the Spanish war head- 
line type. Its pseudo-ethical discussions of music, art and 
literature give it a pass into Back Bay, while its political con- 
tortionism, with a general leaning towards Irish Home Rule 
(in Boston), gives it a considerable circulation at the other end of 
town . The HeraJUTa recent effort to prove that the * ' Mayflower " 
took aboard most of her passengers at Cork has, however, not 
met with universal acceptance. 

The Herald is green, not yellow. Its editorial page smacks of 
the Harvard class-room, with its accompanying unripe theories. 
Further than this it never commits itself. If Harvard wins a 
football game, the sporting editor monopolizes the paper and 
overflows into every issue for six weeks. If some college, like 
Yale or good old Princeton, licks them, yon can look for an 
account of the game under the weather report on the seventh page. 
The defeat of The ^ostoti-ITeraZd-Lawson-Boat, ' ' Independence, ' ' 
has closed the paper to all mention of boats except under the gen- 
eral subject of shipping. Tfie Boston Herald is untraveled. They 
ought to move the whole outfit around the country on a flat car to 
observe that the country has grown a little since 1776. Like The 
Old Ladies* Home Journal, it gets a whole lot out of nothing. 

Th^ price of the paper varies with politics. Individual copies 
sell for two cents. 

Looking for the world outside. The Herald shows you a new view 
of the Boston Public Library ; for travel, it takes you for a ride 
through the Subway ; asking for news, you get hash. 

Tlie Herald is not vicious, but weak. Its insipid crime is its 
provincialism. 
Send me the fifty dollars, as I want to get a sack of coal. 

A Hoosier Sojourning in the Effete East, ' 



}82 



LpOver** 




'y WO tender hearts in a Garden, 
-*- Where early apples hang ! 
** Only one girl in the world for me I " 

Was what the yoang man sang. 
Their chaperon was an angel : 

Their love had fullest leave : 
And the name of the man was Adam, 

The name of the woman Eve. 

A vision of days Olympian ! 

Luridly classic skies I 
Heroes and gods and battles, 

All lit by a woman^s eyes I 
The Beauty that fired a city 

Was ravishing Priam's boy, 
And the name of the lad was Paris, 

The Beauty, Helen of Troy. 

A story of love in Verona ! 

A balcony full of bliss ! 
Friar and nurse and potion. 

And the don't-tell-my-mother-ly kiss ! 
Peace be on both their houses ! 

Montague — Capulet ! 
For Romeo was the lover, 

And the lady Juliet. 

But none of these shady amours 

Compares with my own dear state — 
A very respectable passion 

And certainly up-to-date ! 
I see in propriety's fancy 

Announcements connubial shine, 
And yours is the name of the woman, 

And the name of the man is mine. 

Edward A, Church, 

A Not Impossible Experience. 

pOMTE ROBERT DE MONTES- 
^-^ QUIOU. soon after his arriyal in 
New York, manifested an especial in- 
terest in that serpent which has been 
lifted np in the wilderness for the 
adoration of all tme Americans, '* The 
Strennons Life," with its accompany- 
ing appropriate motto : '* Qet ont and 
do something I It does not matter 
mnch, what. If you cannot put in 
all of yonr time cultivating a slty- 
scraping character, hunt gamblers, or 
decrease the surplus population by 



•LIFE- 

speeding an automobile I " 

A friend, who was willing to gratify 

the Comte's curiosity, led him.there- 

- fore, to the haxmt and home of '* The 

Strenuous Ldfe," the editorial office of 

the Sweat Magazine, 

Comte Robert's eyes were immedi- 
ately attracted to a huge placard which 
hung upon the wall : 

** What the Sweat Magazine, 

The Only True Exponent of The 

Strenuous Life, 

Offers for the Coming Year: 
$10,000 PRIZE, for the best story writ- 
ten by a Plumber, which shall embody 
all the art, tenderness, and human 
sympathy of his trade. 

"WE ARE ESPECIALLY ANX- 
IOUS for a SERIAL which shall de- 
pict the true poetry of the Narrow 
Life. We would suggest the presenta- 
tion of imi)06sible men and women in 
as sordid and commonplace an environ- 
ment as practicable. Contributions 
from New England spinsters gladly 
received. 

"ALL STORIES must positively 
REEK of AXLE-GREASE. 
We would suggest to our 
younger contributors that, 
when about to compose 
stories for the Siceat Magtuine, 
they don their overalls, and 
seek the machinery room of 
a department store. 

"WE PROPOSE to make 
an ANNOUNCEMENT very 
soon, offering a magnificent 
prize for the best story writ- 
ten by a Butcher. We would 
suggest to aspiring slaughter- 
house workers, that although 
they should dwell as much as 
possible upon the carnage and 
flow of blood, it were best to 
pass lightly over the suffer- 
ings and cries of the animals. 
Let a spirit of happy optimism 
pervade your work.'* 

The lyOrsay of his day tot- 
tered to the door, murmuring 
faintly the last words of a 
famous recluse: *'Que vivre est 
difficile y 6 fium ccBur fatiguS ! '* 
Mrs. Wilwn Woodraw, 

A GIRL thinks it better to 
■^-^ have been kissed and 
caught, than never to have 
been kissed. 




Advertisement. 

CORRESPONDENCE SCHOOL OF STARVATION. 

TTSING only your spare time, we 
^ fit you in six months to be a 
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legitiinate actor, or a conscientious 
clergyman. 

A more extended course for sincere 
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Write for booklet oontaining testi- 
monials from graduates who are now 
pursuing art for art's sake. 

SOME DESIGNS FOR BOOK PLATES. 
U. 



mommmmmmm^m^ 



JOHN D. W 



n 



IROCKEFELLERi 




LIFE 



183 





▲M ALL-ABSOBBIXtt LOVM. 

Correct. 

** TVyf Y beat girl is a poach." 

Baltimore." 

' ' No, sir. She's not only a peachy 
but a star.** 

*' Ah, I see. New Orleans." 

*' No. She*s not only a peach and 
a star, bnt a warm baby." 

"Florida.'* 

" Gness again. I might say that» 
in addition to the things I have 
mentioned, she is hot stnff." 

*• Kentucky ?" 

*' Not yet. And besides all these^ 
she is a winner." 

"Ah, I know. Saratoga." 

"Ton mnstdo better than that. 
Perhaps I should also remark that 
she is a dream." 

" No w I know. Philadelphia. " 

"Once more to the front. Re- 
member now, she is a peach and a 
star, a warm baby and hot stuff, a 
winner and a dream." 

** New York 1 " 

" Right 1" 

HE : You make love like a novice. 
*^ He : Then we're both defective. 

1 ought to make love like an expert, 
and you ought not to know the differ- 
ence. 



** MAMMA, I DONT BCLIBTC THAT UTTLS JONXS HOT U 80 TBBT BAD— BS SAID *DAM1f * 
BUT THBM UB PITT GOD BBFOBB IT t '* 



n^HERE is more to be learned from 
"*- one living woman than from a 
whole Smithsonian museum of an- 
thropology. 



LIFE 



\%j[ f\')'jrV) hmvb/^ 




MY LIFE IN MANY STATES. 

My first British holiday was spent in Scotland, 
where I stayed for a week. When I was at Bal- 
moral the Queen happened to be there. Leaving 
Balmoral, I went to Braemar, on the way to Aber- 
deen. A number of young students were there at 
the time, and I spent some moments talking with 
them. Suddenly, there was a tremendous uproar 
and excitement, and I saw a four-in-hand drive up. 
The students informed me that it was the Premier, 
Lord John Russell, who had Just returned from an 
audience with the Queen at Balmoral. I saw there 
was a chance for some sport. Turning to the 
students, with a smile, I said : "I wonder how his 
lordship knew I had come to Braemar? I hoi>e to 
have the pleasure of speaking with him." 

The students laughed satirically. One of them 
said : "Look heah. Mr. Train, that sort of thing 
won't do heah, you know. We don't do things as 
you do In America." Another suggested that I 
should not be treated very civilly if I attempted to 
approach Lord John Russell. 

For reply, I took out a card and wrote on it : 
"An American, in the Highlands of Scotland, is 
delighted to know that he is under the same roof 
with England's Premier, Lord John Russell, and, 
before he goes, would ask the pleasure of speaking 
with his lordship for a moment." I carefully folded 
the card in the letter that had been given to me 
by Mr. Webster, and afterward signed by the Presi- 
dent of the United States and Henry Clay. I sent 
the two in to his lordship. 

In a few minutes the door opened, and the sec- 
retary of Lord John Russell came in and asked for 
"Mr. Train." I said I was Mr. Train. "Lord 



John Russell," replied the secretary, "waits the 
pleasure of speaking with Mr. Train, of Boston." 
I followed him out of the room, to the amazement 
of the young studenU, who didn't do things that 
way in England. — From Oeorge Francis Train's 
Autobiography, published by the Appletons. 

Commenting on the columns of space devoted 
to the doings of royalty in the daily newspapers, 
F. Peter Dunne's "Mr. Dooley" says: 

"The king business is like a poker game. It's 
been goin' on f'r a long time, an' whiniver it puts 
its money in we lay down, thinkin' we was up again' 
a handfull iv kings an' queens. But th* minyit 
they'se a show-down th' bluff is over. Thin we see 
that th' hand that we were afraid iv is composed 
intirely iv sivins. sixes an' dooces, with maybe wan 
Jack that looks like a king on'y to near-sighted 
people. A show-down is death to rilety. Whin I 
was a boy. if a king fell out with his folks, no wan 
knew iv It but th' earls an' markesses an' Jooks 
that overheerd th' row while they were* waltin' on 
th' table. They didn't say annything, but wrote it 
down in a notebook an' published it afther they 
was dead. Whin th' king passed th' butther plate 
so high to his wife that it caught her in th' eye. it 
was a rile secret. Whin his rile spouse pulled his 
majesty around th* room be th' hair Iv th' head, th' 
tale remained in th' fam'ly till it got into history. 
Whin wan iv th' princesses threatened to skip with 
a Jook. th' king touched th' spring Iv th' thn^- 
dure, an* her rile highness, Augoostlna CUmintina 
Sofia Maria Mary Ann, wint down among th' qoal 
an' th' potatoes an' niver was heerd iv again. But 
nowadays 'tis dift'rent. Th* window shades is up 
at th* king's house as well as ivrywhere else. Th' 



gas is lighted, an' we see his majesty stormin' 
around because th' dinner is late, kickln' th* rile 
dog, whalin' th' princes iv th' blood with a lath, 
brushin' his crown befure goln' out, shavln' his 
chin, sneakln' a dhrink at bed-time. Jawin' his wife, 
an' makin' faces at his daughter." — Copyright, 
Robert Howard Russell, 1902. 

An amusing story is told of a New England 
minister who often speaks in behalf of a certaiD 
charity in which he is greatly interested. He has 
a fine voice and a graphic way of telling incidents 
both humorous and pathetic, so that his hearers 
are often "moved to laughter or to tears." 

At the close of one meeting* nt which he had 
spoken with great effect, and a large gain for the 
charity had been the direct result, a little old lady 
approached the minister. 

"Oh," she said, earnestly, "I've been so interest- 
ed in hearing about those poor, dear children! 
And I suppose a great many of those stories you 
told are really true, aren't they?" — Youth's Com- 
panion, 

On one occasion the Pope wrote a message to 
be printed in a newspaper, and copies were shown 
in advance to prominent men by the newspaper, 
with a request for comment to be printed at the 
same time with the document. To the request 
made of him, the late Thomas B. Reed replied: 
"The overpowering unimportance of this makes 
me speechless. I have nothing to say."— Arponaut. 

Politician : I'll do what I can to get work for 
you. 

Citizen : I don't want work ; what I'm after 
is a city joh.-^Boston Transcript. 



Life is for sale by all Newsdealers in Great Britain. The intematioual News 
Company, Bream's Building, Chancery Lane, London. E. C, England, Agents. 



Established 1823. 

WILSON 
WHISKEY 

That's All I 



WILSON DISTIIjLINO oo., 
Baltimore. Md. 



"STRONQEST IN TttB WORLD/* 

The Ff*rty-*hiJtl JLnimml Statement ci' ill* EiiTiiraltlfl Uf^ AftnirB^ftce Sw:l<rty for bmln^ (■ of W^ i« jmb. 
liAhefl f(>-doj. T i* eoii»-rT»|ii»ni ■ ►? th mArinu^eni' ftt Li ' vldent In ibo clArftctor i>f tile lato*?ipen^ flrif4>d. 
THe tT'Ul o r illlne «■»- tti in cludJn^ tbot* b< arlTiij no tn w P«t, t» ^^..^iffiM^. 7K, Aftt- r pm vldlng r*r t t ► ay 
U9.ii\ Lltv, tber b ^ n t?6»l2r,4l».Tl .,r( , n . < urplim tu yUArd OKAiluit utrvree wntlnse^tK'l* *. 

DuriiiNf IWB the GkKnet^ wtut* ti.t* Iftrge t o^uf iint uf ttt'W IvdsUibw In Jtfl lustorv , f$ftl,^S &!(, lUnJ ihe 
flU^tBJitiln? awuranc* on D ts mix r 31 w^* ti.2«;iM,&». Ttie Inf ome nx?rlTm « uiiDv i )i« y» ju- inm i r-un 
p™iiiuin*»XPSa,tSia, from Interest, rtmf, rt*?., |lJi,ff74 MS.fll, nMJcluK* <diaJ of tw.007,{H3,S5. 

Tlie a mU ty lyt id d ftta cla^mB vittu> i*i,*flJ- -.t, *n.ilow nn^ntsftriJ H^fUir^ dJrldetiJ p^^Lk'i n jtmnutiMtur 
to $AjB^,&i&.nf AO'I KUT' lul^ Taines (a,12lS,4Ki.>«^ Ttieiimoaiil.ofi£llYtdpjiil[t,|4iT7,W4.JJi. *» tun rh nu >re 
tbftn wmi pfUd la 1W>U Then WJM l^n» Bf^^r prorim<a« for kII tlM rest of i]ie cUsbiLr«>QD»itnl»^ ^^la^ltwM, 
or tro jjef cent, of tli* entlns Incomo for fumrs JnveatiucnL 



lOO 

Fine Oriental 
Carpets. 

Kirman, Serebend, Garevan, 
Mesched, Khorassan, Kurdistan, 
Tabriz. 

25^ Reduction from Regular Prices, 

NEW YORK. 



•THE HAMC B EvonnmNa' 

Esterbrook 

on a pen isj 
Snarantee off 



Na 130 
Is exactly! 
name i 
Over 150 
other stylesj 
every pu 
stationers 
Accept no 



an absdote 
itseudknGe 



Easy Writer. 

what its 

plies. Tlyit 

3(1 varieties of 

to snit 

ase. All 

have thesif 

substitute. 



The Esterbrook Swbl RNCa 



g^^'^^mmns^^ 






SAVE TOH BiaESTIOI ^»^fflf .fTiJffS SoS^MM SoiUC 

ToarKmo and nUddrentiur- masoned with %0%M4MM49%^V «'•••■"' 



your voap and mUd dre«tn«r ■ masoned with 
•nd 70Q will never knuw tiie meuuns of Dr 



sell it. Free Booklet on Request. 



"^. 



a. TryitaadbeconTlnoed. Allgrooen 
.ILHENNY'S TABASCO, New Iberte. La. 



MOLETTESdoCZAR 



THE EVER FASHIONABLE PERFUME Of 
ORIZA-L.LEGRAND(Ora2idFrlzFari8l900) 



LIFE 



No better Turkish Cigarette 
can be made 



Ergyptian 
Deities 



' The Kiiiff'8 Highway.*' 



TO THE 

GATEWAYS OP COMMERCE 

THROUGH THE 

CENTERS OP POPULATION, 

adding greatly to the interest of your 
journey, without increasing its ex- 
pense beyond what you would expect 
to pay for the '* best," which you se- 
cure if you travel by the 



NEV YORK CENTRAL LINES. 



A copy of •*roiir-Traok Series" 1^0.18, 
' Urban Population in 1900," will be vent free, 



on receipt of a two-o«'nt stamp by George H. 
Duiiels. Generai Passenger Ag<*nt, New 
York Centml A Hndfion River R. B., Grand 



Central Station, New Toriu 




fV 



RfilSwtiy travel is 

Vou dt>£i't know 
who hafl just used 
tljo soap lunliahed 
on slt^eplui; Cfira or 
liilifiU'la. Every ad- 
viijciUiji^ In taking 
^iUi you a c&kG oj 



V -^ Woodbury's 



A I tucks tho dirt but 
ruspL^CU tti6 tkin^ 
iJat'S not dry np tbe 
iiaiumloll.DeliiflU- 
fijl for the hands. 
Rosu^iiH, clcunsieg^ 
inuk^'a tliem M'liit-e 

'■inoolh. Kei'pa 
' i Ml !^o iiio, nom&L- 
i. i Jiow oJteii they 
niiijSt be \Ffl5hed. 

AeklnFoap, 

Tr[nt il£« cwks 
f ipT 1 cti let p 

The Atidrtw 
Jerg«n« Ca. 

Sol* i^Qtib, Cludtitittl, ^ 






I 



MAGAM FALLS 9 HOURS FROM NEW YORK VIA NEW YORK CENTRAL 



LIFE- 



r! 



^^1 



, Qua fboLi 
feNTEMPo. 




Father: I wonder what's the matter with Nel- 
lie this morning. She acts like one possessed. 

Mother: She probably is. I noUced a new 
ring on her finger when she came down stairs. — 
Philadelphia Bulletin. 

Fob oonrenience, really superior hotel service 
for select patronage, and climate, there is nothing 
for New Yorkers quite like Lakewood, New Jersey. 
Laxtbel House. 
Laubel-in-the-Pines. 

"You needn't tell me/' averred Miss Batchgurl, 
"that golf isn't good exercise. It makes the young 
men so strong in the arms that — that you can 
scarcely breathe." — Chicago Tribune. 

8fobt8iian*8 Show. 

Madison Square Garden, 

February 21st to March 7th. 

AdmlBsion 60 cents. 

A z/>CAL band was one day playing at Dun- 
fentfline when an old wearer came up and asked 
the bandmaster what air they were playing. "That 
Is 'The Death of Nelson,' " replied the bandmaster 
solemnly. "Ay, mon," replied the weaver, "ye hae 
gl'en him an awfu' death." — Tid Bite. 

Ou) Point Comtobt, Va. The key to the James 
River. See the sites of former vivid war scenes. 
See history-endeared places. A postal to the Cham- 
be rl in brings a booklet. 

P. Caddaqan of the Hoffman House tells a story 
of how one night one of his guests who had occa- 
sion to pass through the Tenderloin district came 
into the hotel considerably exercised. When Cad- 
dagan asked him what was the matter, lie said : 

"As I was coming along the street a fellow 
jumped in front of me and. presenting a pistol, 
said : 'Give me your money or I'll blow your 
brains out !' " 

"And what did you do?" 

"Simply told him to blow away : that I would 
rather be In New York without brains than without 
money." — New York Timea. 

ELECTRIC-LIGHTED TRAIN TO CALIFORNIA. 
The "Overland Limited" via Chicago and North- 
western, Union Pacific, and Southern Pacific Rail- 
ways, has electric reading lamps in every berth ; 
long distance telephone service, buffet-library cars 
(with barber and bath), compartment observation 
cars, and dining cars. All agents sell tickets via 
this route. 

Wife: I found out something to-day that I 
promised never to tell. 

Husband: Well, go ahead; I'm listening. — 
Chicago Daily News. 

Popular clamor is going the rounds for the famous 
Extra Dry Champagne, Cook's Imperial. Try it! You 
will like it 

"Did Johnson's purchase include also the good- 
will of the business?" 

"There wasn't any goodwill to it. It was a 
coal dealer that Johnson bought out." — Syracuse 
Herald. 

HOTEL VENDOME. BOSTON. 
The ideal hotel of America for permanent and 
transient guests. 

Angelinb: What did Dorothy say when you 
ventured to kiss her? 

Reginald: She said. "Stop right where you 
« re ! • • — Evening Sun. 






^"l^oa^ 



Costly 
Brewing 



The water used in SCHLITZ Beer comes 
from six wells, driven down to rock. 

The barley is the finest grown, selected 
personally by a partner in our concern. 

The hops come mostly from Bohemia, 
and cost twice what common hops cost. 

Every process of the brewing is in per- 
sonal charge <of two of the brothers who 
own the business. 

All the air that touches SCHLITZ Beer is 
filtered. Every drop of SCHLITZ Beer is 
filtered through masses of white wood pulp^ 

Every bottle is cleaned by machinery y^//r 
times before using. 

After the bottle is filled and sealed, it is ster- 
ilized for i\ hours by the process of M.Pasteun 

Common beer can be brewed for half the cost of 
SCHLITZ; but our extra cost is all spent to insure absolute 
purity. Yet common beer and SCHLITZ Beer cost you 
the same. Why not get the best for your money ? 

Ask for the Brewery Bottling. 



The only PUKE and COBRBCT ARTIFICIAL 
MINERAL WATERS sold in Amerloa to-day. 

CARBONIC* ARTIFICIAL VICHY* 
SELTERS, CLUB SODA, Etc., 

are also pnt np in bottles for ont of town 
delivery, and can be sent bv freUrbt or 
express to any part of the United States. 

"^"•'^ CARL H. SCHULTZ 

TeLSMOUadtionSq. «XM44 lint Are., N.T. 



'One taste convinces 

KORN-KRISP 

Always, ready to eal 



O eROW RYE 



A 
STRAIGHT 



WHISKEY 



H. B. KIRK & CO., 
SOLE BOTTLERSt NEW YORK. 



Fully Ripe 



Made from the choicest of selected 
Rye, and distilled under every 
precaution, insuring the highest 
nutrient quality, 



[WKMAfS 



JWTtRWE 



Hunter 

Baltimore 

Rye 



^^^H^^ 



^ALTIMORE^rE 

., BOTTLtDBV 

WmLanahan&SON 



Undergoes thor- 
ough ai^eing be- 
fore it is sold, and 
in this state of 
fullest develop- 
ment it is the per- 
fection of Rye 
Whiskey. 



It is particularly 
recommended to 
women because 
of its aq:e and ex- 
cellence. 



Sold at aU flnt-clMs cafes and hr jobbem 
WM. LANAHAN A SON, Baltlmora, Md. 



BR 



TR 



WN'S 



Clear 

the Tolce. 

BR NCHIALcuro^coi^^^^^^ 

and oolds. 

In boxes only. 
Avoid Imitations. 



CHES 




DK. STALL 



STALL'S BOOKS 

A Man with a Messag:e 

Millions of people always await 
the man wiih a real message. 
Dr. Stall has found it so. His 
books are already circulated in 
every land. 

275tb tbouMnd in Bnglisb. 

They are being translated into 
several languages in Europe 
and two in Asia. 

THE SELF AND SEX SERIES 

has the unquauned endorsement of 
Dr. Joseph Cook Bishop Vincent 

Rev. CM. Sheldon Anthony Comstock 

Rev. P. B. Meyer "Pansy" 

Dr. Theodore L. Cuyler Frances B. Wlllard 
Dr. Prancis B. Claric Lady H. Somerset 
Bninent physicians and hundreds of others. 
4 BOOKS TO MBN. By Sylvanus Stall, D.D. 
What a Young Boy Ought to Know. 
What a Young Man Ought to Know. 

What A Young Husband Ought to Know. 
What a Man of 45 Ought to Know. 
4 BOOKS TO WOMEN. By Mrs. Mary Wood- 
Allen, M.D., and Mrs. Emma F. A. Drake, M.D. 
What a Young Girl Ought to Know. 

What a Young Woman Ought to Know. 
What a Young Wife Ought to Know. 
What a Woman of 45 Ought to Know. 
Sr Ptr copy, post free. Send J or table 0/ contents. 

VIr Publishlns Co. y5?,a^~' iJJKSdSu 



LIFE 



CO meinr to carruuie wEdOQiMinERS 

Write to-day for our illnstrated catalogue (free) which describes our goods truthfully, 
eicplains our method and our guarantee and makes it safe, simple and easy for you to 
get carriagesi harness and horse accessories direct from our factory at wholesale prices. 

THE COLUMBUS CARRIAGE miB HARNESS COMPANY. 
Factory «mI General OIBce, Columbus, 0. Western OIBco A Distributing House, St Louis, Mo. 

Write to neanst office^ 




•'STRONGEST IN THE WORLD" 

THE EQUITABLE LIFE 
ASSURANCE SOCIETY 

OF THE UNITED STATES. 
HENRY B. HYDE, Fonnder. 



Outstanding Assurance 

Dec. 31, 1902 . . . $1,292,446,595.00 

New Assurance Issued 

in 1902 281,249,944.00 

Income 69,007,012.25 

Assets Dec. 31, 1902 . 359»395>537'72 

Assurance Fund and 

all other liabilities . . 284,268,040.95 

Surplus 75,127,496.77 

Paid Policyholders in 

1902 29,191,250.79 

JAMES W. ALEXANDER, President. 
JAMES H. HYDE, Vice-President. 



LIFE 





Bicycle 

Playing 

Cards 

wear well. 



Sold by dealers. Popular price. 
20 backs, including new Automo- 
bile designs. Order by name. 
Design shown is "Motorette" 
back.- Copyrighted, 1900, by 

I^The U. S. Playing Card Co. 
Cincinnati, U. S. A. 

We will send 128-paee Condensed Hoyle 
for 10c. stamps. If addressed to Dept.5l. 



DOMINION LINE toEUROPE 




Boston to Q'jBonstowii and UierpDot j 

!^ S. roniMionnf^aUli* 1 1) ^000 toi 
S, ^. Neil' fsiislantlf II,4UOtou»^ 
!«. f«. CnnnclH, . lO-^oaOlann 

2i$, $^. m^rKin, • 11,635 IfPiiH 
IWEDITERRAHEAIi SERVICE^ 
lamcrs d]D?ct to A^^rcn, Gibraltar, 

a If il r I a , S t; mi for U J ri- 1 rau.' J lii ju k let, 
DONIINION LINE 

(S'^UltB r hj I r 11 S t re 1 1 , C ii 1 1? .s 




The Second 
American VLevolution 

IX 1 778 Americmii threw a car^o of Tea overboard 
a« * protect BgMiDBt tiixailoit without t«,\»t«c«iv- 
tiition and to aiiow their contempt for forviKO 
caatoma. llihtory uow repeata it««lfl To-dar 
Aiiierirana are throwing foreign ALB "overboaid ^* 
— aiiuply becauM 

EVANS' 
ALE 

is bettor. The eecond revolution began with tlw 
botUinir of BVANc)* ALB 

by its miJcers at the bre^arery. 

Are you in step with the march of progreaa in 1 
Ale ioduairy f 






TO CALIFORNIA VS^lVtVi^ 

6Af(Tl rC cm. ihf ImimHci-ih California IJ lu Ir«j. lb rr«|& 



Under this Cover 

_ , CATALO&UE 



Standard 
Operators 
Can Do 

15 Vo 

,„„ , ^ . , . . ,, J More Work 
I Whith wrdcs m plain sigMj ^^^ 

WJtHams iion on ativ oLhcr Typewriter* 

iu3 lIi mp3 E«nt lo re$porisib1« part ie». 

WfLUAMS TVPtWRJira £^., Dtrbv, Conn. 



GOUT & RHEUMATISM 



Lh^Creat EngMBhR«m©dyl 



iBLA/R'S PtLiLS 



I Sfl f e, Sura, C f Fecth^e 
IPBTTGGTSTL, or 2H Wimim' 






mi^ 




n« Hightit Typt of French Champaam 
CODMAN & HALL CO. 

BOSTON, - . , MASS. 



LIFE 



K6e WINTER. 
R.ESORTS 

Texas 

Mexico and 

CalifornioL 

are best reached from 5T. LOUIS 
via 

Iron Mountain 
R.oute 

The direct line to 

HOT SPRINGS. ARKANSAS 



Blegont equipment Cafe dining cars 

Meals a la carte 

Excursion Tickets on sale 

Write for booiclets 



W. E. HOYT 

General Eastern Pass. Ac^nt 

335 Broadway, New York 

H. C. TOWNSEND 

Oeueral Pass. Agent, St. Louis, Mo. 



Richard Bennett 

TAILOR 

Riding, Driving, 6olf Suits, Uniforms and Livsriss 
Importer of Fine Woolens 

Fine Shirts a Specialty 
206 and 208 Broadway, New York 

EVENING POST BUILDING 



IVIARLENA/OOD 

N£AR CINCINNATI, OHIO. 

A Sanatorium established In 1875 for the private care and 
medical treatment of Urus and Alcoliollc Addle- 
tloiiM. Ttiousands tiavlng failed elsewhere have been 
cured by as. Home Treatment If Dealred. 

Address Thb Dr. J. L. SrBptiKNs Co . Pep. 77, Lebanon. 0. 



THE CITY OF NEW YORK, 

DEPARTMENT OF TAXE^i AND ASSESSMENTS, 

MAIN OFFICE. BOROUGH OF MANHATTAN. 

NO. 280 BROADWAY, STEWART BUILDING, 

January 12, 1003. 
NOTICE is HEREBY GIVEN. AS REQUIRED 
by the (Jreatcr New York Charter, that the books 
called "The Annual Record of the Asseaeed Valuation 
of Real and Personal Estate of the Boroughs of Man- 
hattan, The Bronx, Brouklyn. Queens and Richmond, 
comprisinjr The City of New York," will be open for 
examination and correction on the second Mcjnday of 
January, and will remain open until the 
1ST DAY OF APRIL, 19<X1 
During- the time that the books are open to public 
inspection, application may be made by any person 
or corporation clalmln)^ to be aggrieved by the as- 
sessed valuation of real or personal estate to have the 
eame corrected. 

In the Borough of Manhattan, at the main office of 
the E>epartfnent of Taxes and Assessments, No. 280 
Broadway. 

In the Borough of The Bronx, at ihe office of th. 
Department, Municipal Building. One Hundi*ed an»l 
Seventy-seventh Street and Third Avenue. 

In the Brtrough of Brooklyn, at the office of the Di - 
partmeB-it, Municipal Building. 

In the Borough of Queens, at the office of the De- 
partment. Hackett Building, Jackson Avenue an-1 
Fifth Street, Ix)ng Island City. 

In the Borough of Richmond, at the office of the 
Department, Masonic Building, Stapleton. 

J'orporetions In all the Boroughs must make appll- 
ration only at the main office in the Borough of Man- 
hattan. 

Applications In relation to the assessed valuation of 
personal estate must be made by the person assessed 
at the ofHce of the Department in the Borough where 
!»uch person resides, and In the case of a non-resident 
carrying: on business In The City of New York, at 
the office of the Department of the Borough where such 
place of business Is located between the hour.s of 10 
A- M. and 2 P. M., except on Saturday, when all ap- 
plications must be made between 10 A. M. and 12 
noon. JAMES L WELLS Pre.>^ident, 

WILLIAM ?. COGSWKLL. 
GEORGE J. GILLESPIE. 
SAMUEL STRASBOURGER. 
RUFUS L. SCOTT, 
Comml^fsloners of Taxes and Assessments. 




Freddii Femur : finb pubck of uobsbflksh you hivb thbrk. 

Corporal Drybones: ybs, sir, that horse went all through the war with 

MK, AND although ABOIT HALF A POZBN BULLBTB FA88BD THROUGH HER, SHE DIDN'T 
GET HIT ONCE.— TA^ MOfUt . 



BUFFALO LITHIA WATER 

Is Offered to the Public Upon its Record of Results 
Accomplished. Nothing Save an Actual Test can 
be more Satisfactory to the Patient than the Testi- 
mony of Eminent Medical Men who have Repeat- 
edly Tested its Merits in Bright's Disease, Albumi- 
nuria. Renal Calculi, Inflammation of the Bladder. 
Gout Rheumatism and Uric Acid Troubles. 

Dr. Roberts Bartholow, forfner Professor Materia Medica and General Ther- 
apeutics in Jefferson Medical College, Philadelphia, and author of **Bartholows 
Materia Medtca and Therapeutics'* and other well-knoum medical works, says^^ It 
Is used with great advaiitag:e in Qouty, Rheumatic and Renal Affections. 

Dr. G. A. Foote. of Warrenton, N. C^ex-President Medical Society of North 
Carolina, formerly Mentder of the State Board of Medical Examiners, and also of 
the Slate Board of Health, After reporting remarkable relief obtained from the use of 
this water in a case of CH RON id BRIQHT'S DISEASE in his own person, Dr. 
Foote says: "From this experience in my own case, and obser\'ation of its action m 
similar cases in patients for whom 1 have prescribed the water, I have no hesitancy in 

TpfnTorfh^a'? BUEfiiijoLniiuiwoQ L'„o^; .?r^.er.rt;rdb"f 

tressing malady so difficult of treatment." 

Geo. Halsted Boyland, A. M., M. D., of ^""^P^'^PLii ^^li^^J^ 
the Faculy of Paris, says: "There I* NO REMEDY SO ABSOLUTELY SPECIFIC 
IN ALL FORMS OF ALBUMINURIA and BRIQHT'S DISEASE, whether acute or 

g~a"s BOEHUJOlJIIDAWinBiiPf ^i^^i'cks*^^^^^^^ 

Albumin is found in the urine as late as the last week before confinement, if this 
water and a millc diet is prescril>ed, tlie Albumin disappears rapidly from the 
urine and the patient has a positive g:uarantee against Puerperal Convulsions. 
Used as a substitute for ordinary water during the period of Gestation it will 
be found invaluable as a preventive of Puerperal Convulsions and other disturb- 
ances incident to this condition. 

Voluminous medical testimony of the highest order showing the value of this 
water in the other diseases mentioned mailed to any address. 

JMimiX) UTHMI WWER i« ^«r ^^^ ^^y ^^^^^^^ generally. 

PROPRIETOR, BUFFALO LITHIA SPRINGS, VA. 



ABBOTTSomaNAiANCOSTURABllTERS 



LIFE 



— ^— The U. 5. 

"Long Distance" 
Automobile Co/s 

TOURING CARS 

Built for American Roads 




TYPE C. TONNEAU 



Ttvo Cylinders Vertical Engine 
Trice ^2500.00 

Built for service, lonjr runs and hill 
climbing. Simply operated, free from 
vibration. Each part easily reached, 
no intricate machinery to get out of order. 

TYPE A. RUNABOUT ------- $1250.00 

TYPE B. TONNEAU - 1500.00 

Our book is of unusual interest to 
Automobilists. Sent free on request . 

U.S. Long Distance Automobile Co. 

1 10-114 West 41st Street, New Yoric 
Factory, 307 Whlton St., Jersey City 





^f H^^Vv^A^A CIGARS 



THE MOST POPULAR SIZES 






Wrm9kAmntmw 



C^f^Olfc l4#«-«|*| 






A Tempting 
Delicacy 




Fancy Apples 



Shredded Whole Wheat Biseuit 

is the Natural Food for Invalids because it is the 
most porous and light of all foods and presents 
^eater surface /or the action of dij^estive /iuids. 
These fluids are drawn hy absorption into every 
part of the wheat shreds, making the food inimcd- 
lately assimi'able. 

Shredded i^'hole Wheat Biscuit contains a food 
property to upbuild each and every element of the 
depleted body. Foods made of part of the wheat, 
such as white-flour bread, cannot do this, and the fer- 
ment contained in them results in a sour mass in 
the stomach. There is no lard, yeast or health-dis- 
turbing ingredient of any nature m Shredded Whole 
Wheat Biscuit and its use insures a bweet, clean 
stomach. 

Shredded Whole Wheat Biscuit purifies the di- 
gestive tract, and constipation is unknown to those 
who eat it regularly. It can be prepared in so many 
tempting ways that the fickle appetite is always at- 
tracted by its goodness and the ailing body quickly 
responds to its all-nourishing force. 

For sale hv all );ro. ers. Send for "Tlit- Vital Question" 
(cook IhjoIc. illustrated in cijlurs) FREE* Addrcs:i 

THE NATURAL FOOD CO., Niagara Falls. N. Y. 



Williams/ 
Shat/inq 
Stich^ 

I Men of luxurious and] 

refined tastes are sat- 
I isfied with nothing less 
f than Williams' Shaving ' 
' Stick. Its creamy, heal- 
ing lather, convenience 
of form, and attractive 
style, leave nothing to be 
desired. 

Piii-r, Tu.'nttv-tivr Ceuts^o/ all Druggists 

The J. B. WILLIAMS CO., Gla8teiibiiry,CC.i 



ijRtbDfcN SYUNBYj 



from the famous Lake Shore 

section of Western New York. 

Kionfs, Baldwins, Qreeniof s, Northero 

Spys, Russets, Spitzeolmri:5, 

Seek-no-furthers, Etc, 

Delivered at your door for I3.00 per 

box. all charges prepaid to points east of 

the Mississippi river and north of the 

Ohio. Other points add 50 cents. 

Boxes contain about one bushel. 
according to size and variety. Each 
apple carefuMy selected, wrapped In 
paper and perfectly packed. In single 
varieties or assorted. 

Fancy Evaporated Apples 

prepared and packed by us, suitable for 
sauces, pies, etc. Will keep indefinitely. 
Directions inside. 25-lb. box, $3, so, 
50-lb. box, ;?6.oo. Charges prepaid as 
above. 

Afouey refunded i/ not as ne state. We are tJk^ 
tartest indtviduai shippers of apples in the Unift-ti 
State* . Ou r cold s torage capacity is 200flO0 ba rre/s. 

£.M.Upton&Co.Hilton,N.Y. 



^RCSSOr THE J. W. PMATT CO.. NEW TORK 



VOLUME XL[. 



NEW YORK, MARCH 6, 1903. 

Entered at the New Torir fosA Offlc* ^ J^n^cond-Class Mali Matter. 



NUMBER 1062. 




ACCORDING TO NEWTON 



COPVRiaHT roil OREAT BIIITAIN by JAMES HCNOCRSON 
UNDER THE ACT OW 1««1. 



LIFE 



VIRGINIA HOT SPRINGS 

2,500 Feet Elevatton MagiiifficMit MiNmUin Snrroniidiiigs Open All the Year 

""^'^*'" Chesapeake & Ohio Railway 




INCOMPARABLE SPWNQ, SUMMER AND FALL CLIMATE 

Luxurious baths and most curatiTe waters known for rheumatism, Rout, obesity 
and nervous troubles. New g^olf club house with squash court, lounginic rooms, 
cafe, ping pong, etc. Fine golf links, tennis courts, pleasure pool, excellent 
livery and all outdoor pastimes. 

N«w Homestead and Cottetfos.-The hotel is a brick structure of the 
highest class, completed in September, 1902, containing ^00 rooms and aoo 
private baths. Long distance 'phone in each room. Broker's ofhce with direct 
New York wire. 

Pullman compartment car from New York via Washington and the Chesapeake 
and Ohio Railway. The F. F. V. Limited, leaving New York 4:55 P. M., 
arrives Hot Springs 7:25 A. M. Excursion tickets at C. & O. omces, 362 
Broadway, New York, and otlices Pennsylvania R. R. and connecting lines 
throughout the country. For hotel information, address 

FRED. STERRY, Manager, Hot Sprinqs, Bath Co., Va. 




A ticket to California via the 

Goidon State Limited 

is practically a guarantee that for 2^ 
days you will be supremely happy ; 
that you will sleep soundly, fare on 
the best the land affords, meet pleasant 
people, see interesting scenery, and be 
transported from the centre of the continent 
to its southwestern corner in the briefest 
possible space of time. 

Newest of transcontinental trains — and 
the most com'"ortable. 



Leaves Chicago daily via the £1 Paso-Rock Island 
route. Less than three days to Los Angeles. Through 
cans to Santa Barbara and San Francisco. Electric 
lights ; electric fans ; bath room ; barber shop ; Book- 
lovers' Library. Lowest altitudes of any line across 
the continent. Tickets, berths and full information at 
this office. J no. Sebastian, P.T.M., Chicago, 111. 




FOR THE 

SKIN 



For chapped hands and lips, chafing 
and all skin irritations^ nothing equals 

Velcrema 

Possesses marvellous healings curative 
powers* Delightful after shaving. Try 
it, 25 c* Made by Lundborg. 



The Test 




of Service 

always proves the ibsolute 
supremacy of the 

REMINGTON 

TYPEWRITER 



Remington Typewriter Company 

327 Broadwiy, New York 



J 



LIFE 



193 




V..>^' BEWARE the WINDS oj MARCH 



)94 



LIFE 




Diaz ifl not too old for ench service, 
why not appoint him ? 



*• JVkiie there is Life there's Hope:' 

VOL. XU. MABCH 5, 1908. Ko. 1062. 

19 W«gp THiBTT-FiRar St., New Tori. 





Published ereiT Thareday- 9&>00 a letx in ad- 
▼aaoe. Postage to forelfrn countries In the Postal 
Union, $1.04 a year extra, dlnsle current copies, 
10 oents. Back numbers, after three months from 
date of pnbUoatlon. 26 centa. 

No contribution wiii be returned unless 
accompanied by stamped and addressed 
envelope. 

The illustrations in Life are copyrighted^ 
and are not to be reproduced. 

Prompt notification should be sent by sub- 
scribers of any change of address. 

'T'HE Germans and 
British who 
' latf Ij lilookaded Vene- 
zQt'Ia have been in- 
duced to go home. 
General Castro has 
premised to pay 
scitne of Venezu- 
^eU's outstanding 
bills. She owes 
citizens of nearly 
every country in 
Europe, and seems to have no available 
revenue except what is coUected at her 
custom houses. Of this, a large part 
is now pledged to defray these foreign 
obligations. How the Republic is go- 
ing to maintain its own government 
and conduct the necessary semi-annual 
revolutions without this custom-house 
money, remains to be seen. Nothing 
that is known of General Castro, who 
is the present government, warrants 
the belief that he cares at all whether 
Venezuela's debts are paid or not, and 
nothing that is known of* General 
Matos, who may defeat and supersede 
General Castro at any minute, suggests 
that he takes fiscal obligations any 
more to heart than General Castro 
does. Venezuela shows many symp- 
toms of being an irresponsible State. 
It may be necessary before long to 
have a receiver appointed to manage 
her property and see that a reasonable 
share of her income goes to satisfy the 
reasonable demands of her creditors. 
The question is, Who has power to 
appoint him? The Monroe Doctrine 
says that Europe can't do it. How 
long before it will have to be done 
by the United States? If President 



TT is reported that Mr. John W. 
-^ Gates is going to retire from active 
business, and try to get some real satis- 
faction out of life. He has lately been 
travelling in the West, and denied on 
February 19th, in Chicago, that he had 
won a million dollars at cards on his 
trip. He said the stories were three- 
quarters lies. $1,000,000— f750,000= 
$250,000, which is a fair haul. But, 
after all, there isn't much real comfort 
in playing cards except for a change. 
Bishop Spalding lectured the other day 
on " How to Make the Most 6f Life.'' 
He said that seventy-one per cent, of 
business failures were for moral causes. 
But that does not apply to Mr. Gkites, 
who has done very well in business. 
He said: *'One must be earnest to 
attain anything.'* Mr. Grates has been 
earnest. He said : " It is the quality 
of the things a man yearns for that 
determines his success in making the 
most of life." There is more pros- 
pect of help for Mr. Gkites in that idea. 
If he is really going to settle down 
now and take comfort, it may paj^ him 
to obtain from Bishop Spalding a list 
of yearnings suitable to \nk case, and 
see if he can realize them. The pros- 
pect that he will be able to make the 
most of life by his own undirected 
efforts seems dubious. 




TT is suggested that the President's 
"^ salary be doubled. It is some 
years since it was raised, and mean- 
while the country has grown in wealth 
and population, so that it is not only 
harder to govern it, and provide it 
with office-holders, but there is an ap- 
preciable increase in the demand 
for meals — ^including stimulants, music 
and tobacco— at the White House. The 
capacity of the White House for hos- 
pitalities has lately been very much 
increased by providing another build- 
ing for the President's business offices. 



The cost of living in it has in- 
creased proportionately. The cellars 
hold more rum than heretofore, the 
bedrooms more beds, the beds more 
guests. A President who lives up to 
the present opportunities of the plant 
must unquestionably be at more ex- 
pense than his predecessors. 

Think how inconvenient it would be 
to have a President go out on strike ! 
To be sure, that is not threatened. But if 
we ought to make the salary a hundred 
thousand dollars a year, we can afford 
to do it. The best reason for doing it 
is that our Presidents are usually poor 
men, and that they ought to be able, 
easily and without cheese-paring, to 
save enough out of their salaries dur- 
ing a single term of office to keep 
them in decent comfort the rest of 
their days 




r\UR friends in New York, Pitts- 
^^ burg, Chicago, Philadelphia and 
other centres of interest in Art will be 
glad to learn that the Isabella Stewart 
Gardner Museum in the Fenway, In- 
corporated, in Boston, is now open to 
the public on the first and third Mon- 
days of each month, and the following 
Tuesdays, from eleven A. M. to three 
P. M. Only two hundred tickets will 
be sold for any one day, and none will 
be sold at the door. The price of ad- 
mission will be one dollar. On this basis 
the Museum will not make any money 
unless the gate receipts are heavily 
reinforced by gains from slot ma- 
chines, exit fees and the sale of 
refreshments. But widespread inter- 
est will be felt in the opening of Mrs. 
Gardner's show. A remarkable woman 
has gathered a remarkable collection 
of pictures and junk in one of the most 
remarkable edifices ever put together. 
She has done it in her own way, and 
that has not been in the least like the 
way of anyone else. But she has done 
it wonderfully well ; so says everyone 
whose opinion about pictures and 
palaces is worth attention. Let us 
make our acknowledgments to a lady 
who has placed an object of unique 
interest upon American soil, and 
opened the door, on a crack, to the 
public. 



•LIFE 



195 




A PILL FOR BILL 
* DOCTOR, HOW IS THIS PILL TO BS TAKEN? * 
** SWALLOWED." 



Some Letters of Recommendation. 

npHE bearer of this has been my husband now for several years, 
-*- and is only leaving me because ^ve both feel the need of a 
change. He is willing and obliging, a first-rate man about the 
house, runs errands and carries bundles cheerfully, never kicks 
about expenses, and is used to one night out a week. I can cor- 
dially recommend him to anyone looking for a good, durable 
article. Mrs, A, Ibnguer. 

The young lady who bears this I have loved passionately for 
some time, and she is leaving me now only because I cannot afibrd 
to have her any longer. She is easily loved and responds readily 
to caresses. She is very fond of flowers and candy, and expects 
regular supplies. She likes to go to the theatre and eat anything 



on the bill of fare. Anyone who wishes to be passionately loved 
and broke at the same time will find her up to all the requirements. 

Theodore Stuffer, 

The bearer of this has been in our employ for more than a year, 
as conductor, and has given complete satisfaction. During that 
time he was never known to stop a car at the right comer, or to 
speak a civil word to a passenger. We are sorry to lose him. 

Met, St. Ry. 

The bearer of this has been my typewriter for two years past, 
and only leaves me at my wife's urgent request. She has a kind, 
gentle and loving disposition, and is a most desirable companion. 
She enjoys the theatre very much, and is fond of long drives. 
I shall miss her. Sledger Skate, 



1% 



LIFE 




T7LMORE ELUOTT PEAKE'S noTel, 7%€ PHdt 

-'--' of TeHfaHf. is oar lint taste of the 1908 Actio a. 
Mr. Peake wrote one of the best of Harper's Amer^ 
can novel series two years ago, Tht DarlXngUjvA^ 
and bis new book shows this to have been no hapi>y 
accident It is a vlTld picture of characters i w i' 
small town in Illinois and is extremely interesting. 
(Harper and Brothers. $1.60.) 

Another good beginning for the new seasoTi tg 
Vyrta Lockett Avery's A Virginia Oirl InOuCiH 
War. The material for these memoirs was gather^ni 
from the lips of a Sonthem woman, and Mrs. Averj '» 
pages not only give ns the interesting record of ber 
fHend*s ezp^ences, bnt preserve to a remarkahl(« 
degree the snbtle charm of a dellghtfol personaUtj^ 
(D. Appleton and Company. $1.85.) 

Mr. Eostace H. Miles, Englishman, scholar, 
athlete and crank, has undertaken to distill the 
one drop of essential truth from each of th<^ 
world-bruited panaceas from Christian Science 
to the Kneip core, and offers the result, a veri- 
table hypochondriao ponsse^»f6, in a volome 
called Avtnwt to ffeaUA. Mr. MUes has per- 
■onally tested each treatment, and while 
we marvel at his constitution and laugh at 
his foibles, we acknowledge that his book 
contains many valuable suggestions. (E. 
P. Dutton and Company. $1.60.) 

Austin Oobson contributes the latest of 
the critical biographies in the English men 
of letters series, that of Samuel Blchardson. 
Mr. Oobson has addressed himself, to those 
who, while they have never read Famela^ 
CksriwL and Sir CharUi Grandlson, are yet In- 
terested in the beginnings of the English novel. 
Bis volume easily enters the second rank 01 
this excellent series. (The Macmillan Com^ 
pany. 76c.) 

Th€ Jliffhway qf Fait is the title of Rosa 
Kouchette Gary's latest novel. For thlrty-flve 
years Miss Gary has been an Industrious and 
often a popular writer of Ught Action, but the 
style and fashion of twenty years ago are not 
those of to^ay, and while there is undoubtedly 
a strain of homely interest in this rather longlsh 
love story, most readers will And it decidedly 
banal. (J. B. Lippincott Company, Philadel- 
phia. $160) 

The Game qf Ufe is a volume of fables and 
other bits of satire upon twentieth century con- 
ditions from the very sharp pen of Mr. Bolton 
Hall. Cleverness of this quality is scarce, and 
while one does not like them all, one like*) 
some of them more than enough to make an 
average. (A. Wessels and Company. $1.00.) 

Ccg^tttin 7Vw is a maritime Munchausen oC New Eau- 
land origin exploited by Clay Emory. The Captniri fisllows Uib 
ideas of the eminent Baron, his predecessor, so t^ionel^ ha to rather 
take the edgeoffhis yams. (Doubleday, Page and coropanjr. fi 00.} 

J. D. h'tjfaoi. 
OTHER BOCKS RECEIVED. 
A Poclulful qf PoHee. Being an attractive volume of catchy verses 
for children by Abble Farwell Brown. (Houghton, Mifflin and Com- 
pany. $1.-00.) 

The Corred TMngin Good Society. By Florence Howe Hail. (Dana, 
Estesand (^mpany, Boston. 7&c.) 




PUGILISTIC TERM. 
'going dowk fob thb count." 



LIFE 



J97 




Pandemics. 

A N Ohio doctx>r asnnres ns that smallpox is now pan- 
-^^ demic. That is to say, smallpox is all over every- 
-where. 

Diphtheria and scarlet fever are not pandemic, as yet. 
Serum inoculation for these diseases has not been in vogue 
anywhere near as long as vaccination. 



** TIT OW do you suppose she manages to make her hus- 

-^--*- band still love her? " 

" Why, she won't let him draw on her principal ; and 
that, of course, keeps up the interest." 




THE EVOLt/TION OF THE QAME HOG. 




r 



J 



'''»>.-,;. 



'"■*<Wfe. 



1^t» 




sJipL^ 




LIFE'S FASHIONS. 
OFFICIAL C08TI7IIX POB MATOB OP AN AMERICAN MZTBOPOUS. 



'."ijrf*ll 



A LITTLE newsboy, who had been in an accident, 
■^-^ came into his Sunday school class with one of his 
ears bandaged to his head, and said to the teacher, "I'm a 
good one to preach to to-day, for it goes in one ear and 
can't get out the other." 



"V/T AN AGING EDITOR : What is your specialty ? 
^-^ Applicant (haughtily) : I have just graduated 
from college. 

** Well, you might accept the position of editor-in-chief, 
until some of your knowledge wears off." 



»8 



•LIFE 



Ethics. 

A S to Reed Smoot, the 
"^-^ Christian conscience 
says at once, reject him. 

Bat to reject him is to 
lose Utah to the Republi- 
can party, than which no- 
body, unless perchance the* 
Standard Oil Company, is 
doing more to further 
Christian aims and pur- 



Of conrse, the discon- 
certing divergence of theo- 
retical and practical ethics 
is nothing new. 



"VrO oonyersation is as 
•'^^ interesting as that of 
friends with nothing to 
say. 




OKLT A DRBAII. 



r^ OOD MORNING, Miss Parkinton ; 
^-^ good morning. Now what do 
you want in our line to-day? We've 
some fine new novels just in. I de- 
clare, I don't see how so many people 
find time to write novels. But a 
greater number of people find time 
to read them, don't they? 

What's that? It takes longer to 
write one than to read one? Well, I 
don't know. The authors do turn 'em 
out awful fast. Now here's a new 
one by Anthony Hope, — The Intru- 
sions of Peggy, — how'd you like that? 

Oh, you don't care for suggestions? 
You know already what book you 
want? Well, that's all right, too. 
But so few ladies do know. They 
come in here and expect me to select 
a book that will please them. I de- 
clare it's a real comfort to come 
across one who knows what she 
wants, herself. And what is it. Miss 
Parkinton? 

The Pitt Oh, yes, by Frank Nor- 
ris. He's dead, poor fellow. Buch a 
nice young man; he used to come in 
here often, and always smilin' so 
pleasant and affable. Well, now, I'm 
awful sorry, Miss Parkinton, but we 
haven't got that book this morning. 
We sold our last copy yesterday fore- 
noon, and the new ones haven't come 
yet. I'm right down sorry, 'cause I 



THE BOOK-SHOP GIRL 

want to read that book myself. It's 
great, they say, and I know I'll like 
it, for Ethel Flagg says she can't un- 
derstand it, and I'm sure to like the 
books she can't understand. Why, I 
just love Henry James's books, and 
Ethel says she can't get head or tail 
to 'em. I tell her there isn't much 
tale to them, — that's my little joke, 
you know, — but nobody reads Henry 
James for the story. What do I read 
him for? Oh, I don't know exactly; 
but he makes me feel sort of intel- 
lectual and queer. And if you hold 
on tight and read hard, you can often 
make out what he's driving at. Here's 
his new book now. The Wings of the 
Dove, I don't see why you can't take 
this instead of the one you came for, 
and I can get that for you next week. 
You don't care for James? Oh, but 
you could if you only tried. Here, 
I'll read you a sentence from The 
Wings of the Dove at random. I'll 
just open the book anywhere. Now, 
listen to this on page 328: "She could 
have dreamed of his not having the 
view, of his having something or 
other, if need be quite viewless, of his 
own; but he might have what he 
could with least trouble, and the 
view wouldn't be, after all, a positive 
bar. ..." Stop? Oh, yes, I'll 
stop, but that isn't all of the sentence. 



Still, it shows you what I mean, — that 
floundering sort of feeling, as if you 
had just fallen into a dump-heap of 
words. / think it's lovely. 

You don't care for James? Well, 
some folks don't. My aunt, now, she 
says give her The Duchess every 
time. But I like James, — especially 
if I can read a new copy. What? 
Oh, no, I'm not afraid of microbes^ 
but with a new copy, you know, you 
have to stop so often to cut the leaves^ 
and it's such a pleasant rest. 

Now here's Richard Harding 
Davis's Captain Macklin. Captain 
Swashbucklin', / call it. It's one of 
those books you can read by Just 
looking at the pictures. What's that?" 
It has an atmosphere? Well, I don't 
know exactly what you mean by that,, 
but, of course, all Mr. Davis's work 
has an air. Oh, you've read Captain 
Macklin, have you? Well, why don't 
you take Francezkaf That's a his- 
torical novel by Miss Seawell. His- 
torical novels are having a run, aren't 
they? Well, they're better than the 
old Tess and Jude style. Longer, and 
not so broad. They must be easy to> 
write, too. No plot required, char- 
acters ready-made, — ^st add a few 
swear-words and there you are! 
Francezka's up to the average, and 
it's pretty good for a woman to 



•LIFE 



199 




'*JACK, DEAR, WHVN TOU ARS GONE I SHALL PINE AWAT/ 

" don't pine away ; spruce up." 



write. What's that? Women can 
write as well as men? Oh, no, not as 
well. At least, not when it comes to 
real writing. If you mean light lit- 
erature, or even humorous stuff, a 
woman can get right up alongside. 
But when they take themselves seri- 
ously it's too much for them. 

Look at Miss Daskam now; her kid 
stories are out of sight There 
couldn't be anything better than her 
Study in Piracy, or Madness of 
Philip. But when she got out that 
book lately. Whom the Gods De- 
stroyed, I only wished I could coax 
the gods to destroy the whole edition. 
My, but it's doleful. Not a spark of 
humor in it, and that's Miss Daskam's 
strongest card. Now the other day 
Miss Marguerite Merington was in 
here, and she said women have no 
sense of humor. Of course that's 
been said before, lots of times. But 
she said it in earnest, and she meant 
it — and my! but she's mistaken. 
Some of our best funny books are 
written by women. Look at Napo- 
leon Jackson by Mrs. Stuart. There's 
more real humor in that book than 
in all George Ade's slam-bang slang. 
And Mrs, Tree is funny, and Aunt 
Abby's Neighbors, 



Then there's The Housewives of 
Edenrise, by Florence Popham. That's 
sort of funny, but, of course, it's Eng- 
lish, so the fun is clumsy. Still, I 
chuckled over it a lot. Oh, the 
"Ladies I've Laughed With " would 
make an interesting article; I mean 
to write it some time. You didn't 
know I wrote articles? Well, I don't; 
but I'm going to some time. You see 
everybody comes in here, — Wiseacre's 
book-shop is almost like a club for 
the authors, and they say such funny 
things to each other, somebody really 
ought to write them up. But land! 
I couldn't do it, and anyway I don't 
suppose they'd like me to. What 
kind of things do they say? Well, 
they tell their experiences, you know. 

Oh, I*m sure I could write a book 
about them, and I'd call it ** Who's 
Who in the Book-shop.*' 

Oh, you must be going, eh? And 
don't you want any book? What? 
You'll take The Wings of the 
Dave f All right, here's a new copy. 
It's in two volumes, you see. Cut 
the leaves as yon go along. It helps 
to keep your place, and then, when 
you wake up, you can go right on 
from where you left off. Oh, you 
want it for your reading-circle? Well, 



it will, be real nice for that; I should 
think it would last you all winter. 
And let me give you a little tip, Miss 
Parkinton. When you talk about 
Henry James, always refer to his 
work as being 'Un his earlier manner" 
or "in his best vein." He always 
writes in one of those, and it doesn't 
at all matter which is which. Oh, 
yes, I'm quite sure the ladies of the 
club will rave over It. Good- morning, 
Miss Parkinton, good morning. 

What a difference there is between 
the Ladies I've Laughed With, and 
the ladies I laugh at! 

Carolyn Wells. 

rnHE COOK : Would yon mind giv- 
■^ ingme a recommendation, ma'am? 

The Mistress : Why, you have only 
just come. 

** But ye may not want to give me 
wan when I do be leaving." 

^"yHERE goes a man who's life 
is nothing but one long regret. ' ' 

•* Heavens ! How sad I What is 
he?" 

"An editor." 



H 



ISTOBICAL novelists are manu- 
factured, not bom. 




439pw^t*t. twm. If tAf* 



THK BRUTE VEXTURE8 TO PUti^.E 



FE 




OXXET MIGHT POS8IBLY BE MORE SUITABLE. 



202 



LIFE 





Serious and Silly. 

KSSONS in morals taaght 
JVom the stage are of 
loubtful efficacy. Eyen 
in its book form Tols- 
toy's *' Resurrection'' 
was more effective as 
a pictare of contem- 
Iporary Russian life 
'and as a narrative, 
than as teaching men 
to repent of their sins 
against the opposite 
sex. To teach New 
York theatre - goers 
auythiDg except rag- 
time is practically an 
impossibility, and to 
point a moral in a 
play is labor abso- 
lutely lost. The pro- 
ducers of " Resurrec- 
tion," of course, had 
n > such thought in mind, 
uiid their effort is simply 
a theatrical attraction and 
nothing more. In that as- 
pect, it is fit least impressive. Put into the 
flesh, Tolstoy's hero with his remorse and 
ambition for atonement is more ideal than 
possible, and this gives a tone of falseness 
to the whole piece. iVtnce Dimitri was 
enough a man of the world to have aban- 
doned his task of reforming Maslova^ even 
by a marriage which would have wrecked 
him and done her no good, after he had 
seen in the prison what a creature she had 
become. A real man in his position would 
have seen the hopelessness of it and con- 
fined himself to looking after her material 
welfare. In the subsequent scenes we drift 
Into the realm of pure fiction, and the story, 
which up to that point has been realistic, 
loses its interest. As literature the play is 
not imposing, and what might have been a 
scholarly work becomes in this translation 
merely commonplace. 

As a piece of realistic and repulsive acting 
Miss Blanche Walsh's Maslova is more thor- 
oughly artistic than anything seen on the 
New York stage for a long time. Naturally 
comely, she has the courage to put aside her 
attractiveness and lose her identity in that 
of the woman outcast, bloated and bestial in 
her physical degradation and debauched in 
mind to the point where her mentality has 




lost its power. For one moment the last re- 
maining spark of self-respect biases up in a 
mad impulse of revenge against the first 
cause of her downfall, but it is only a fiash, 
and she lapses back into her former state of 
apathy. In this scene Miss Walsh showed 
power as unusual as it was unexpected. 
Mr. Joseph Howarth as Prince Dimitri had 
an almost impossible task, but made the 
character real as far as it could be. He has 
a slight tendency to stiffness and a declam- 
atory style, but he is also manly and tender 
in a manly way. The cast is a large one 
and has many opportunities for good char- 
acter bits which, almost without exception, 
are well done. 

*' Resurrection " is a trifle sombre, but it is 
well staged and well acted and is a decided 
relief from the vapid entertainments which 
are given at most of our theatres. 
» • • 

^HE visible supply of 
Johnnies is' hardly 
large enough to sup- 
ply the customary 
quota for the stage 
doors of all the mu- 
sical comedies now in 
town. Johnnies of a by-gone epoch, men 
who are old enough to have outgrown the 
Johnny habit, have come back to the stage- 
doors again, but even so the musical com- 
edies are so plenteous that many a chorus 
girl goes home lobsterless and with no violets 
to perfume her hall bedroom. This over- 
supply of musical comedy is not only a 
hardship to the ladies of the chorus but is 
more or less of a nuisance to the theatre- 
going public. It occupies the theatres to a 
point where it is difficult for a sane play for 
sane play-goers to find a place in to wn . Per- 
haps, however* this glut of musical comedies 
which are seldom musical and rarely comic 
may prove its own cure. Even the rag-time 
public is getting a little tired and is begin- 
ning to ask for something else. 
• • • 

'T^HE latest candidates for popularity in 
-*- this line are "Nancy Brown," with 
Marie Cahill in the title part, and *' The 
Jewel of Asia," with Mr. James T. Powers 
as the special attraction. The former gives 
Marie Cahill ample opportunity to display 
her engaging personality and pleasant voice. 
In other respects the piece is commonplace, 
although Mr. Edwin Stevens,' whose versa- 
tility seems to know no limit, lends artistic 
dignity to the comedian's part. " The Jewel 
of Asia" is a hodge-podge of ordinary 
music and extraordinarily bad puns. Miss 
Blanche Ring, who showed some cleverness 
earlier in the season, has evidently had her 
head turned by her little success, but even 



her lelf-assuranoe cannot spoil the wretched 
material entrusted to her. Mr. Powers is 
not by any means the funniest of our comedi- 
ans, but he may be relied upon to get a 
good deal out of any humorous lines en- 




MARIE CAHILL. 

trusted to him, and do it in a way not to 
offend. But even the greatest of comedians 
would find it more than difficult to produce 
any effect with the feather-weight imitation 
of fun in **The Jewel of Asia.'» So Mr. 
Powers, in the present instance, is more to 
be condoled with than blamed. 

In the early days of musical comedy these 
pieces might have won success. In the 
strenuous competition of to-day they are 
both among the ''also rans." Metcaffe. 

LIFE'S CONFIDENTIAL GUIDE TO THE 
THEATRES. 

Academy cf Music.—** Florodora." PrebUtorlo 
musical comedy. Moderately well done. 

Belasco.—** The Darling of the Gods.'* Re- 
markably good performance of tragedy of old 
Japan. 

B(/<m.— Marie CahiU in ** Nancy Brown.** See 
above. 

Broadufqy.'-'"rhe Silver Slipper.** Mosioal 
comedy, well stased but ordinary. 

CVwino.—" The Cnlnese Honeymoon.*' Mosical 
comedy. A little better than tbe average. 

Criterion, James T. Powers In ** The Jewel of 
Asia.** See above. 

Daly's,— *' The BlUlonalre.** Masloal comedy. 
Not espedally mnslcal and not very comic. 

Oardeti^MT, Sothem In ••If I Were King.** 
Romantic play, handsomely staged and well 
acted. 

Oamck.-Aimie Rossell In "Mice and Men.** 
Delightful lltUe comedy. 

Herald Square.^'* Ut, Pickwick.*' Musical 
comedy, with Mr. De Wolf Hopper in title part. 
Fairly amasiog. 

irnicib«rdooA:^r.— '•Mr. Bluebeard.** Spectacu- 
lar bat stnptd. 

Manhattan.—'* The Blshop*s Move/* with W. H. 
Thompson as The Bishop. NoUce later. 

iV<m:«^#.— Amelia Binffbam In •*The Frisky Mrs. 
Johnson.'* Amaslng bat not soper-ezcellent. 

Savoy -Mr. Fitch's ''The Girl wltn the Green 
Eyes.*' Society play with jealonsy as the motive, 
worth seeing. Afternoons, "Tbe Uttle Princess.** 
Remarkably clever acting of an amusing child- 

Victoria.— B]»nche Walsh In '* Resurrection.** 
See above 

fra^aci(:V.— George Ade*s •' The Saltan of Sn- 
la.** Mosical comedv. Best of the lot. 

Weber and Fielders — Barlesqae and vaude- 
ville. For good seats apply early to the specu- 
lators. 



LIFE 



203 




J C^SA*^ J^^^^JU.. 



Mist Jones {to Mr. Broum^ viho has survived three wives) : tbvt must arr kind of mixed up in hiayxn with to man ▼ xns. bbowns about. 
Mr. Broton: ou, no« i oaloulatb kot. tou an, now tbbt^bb all DirFBBBNf SHADBfl of bbown. 




A Fragment from the Oxyrhynchous Papyri. 

ND the Lord hardened their hearts so that they hark- 
ened not nnto the plaints of their servants. And be- 
hold, becanse of the intolerable burdens which were 
laid upon them, the servants rebelled against their 
masters, and there was a coal famine in the land. 
In all the length and breadth of the land not a 
pick was raised ; not a man lifted his hand to draw 
the treasures of the mines from the bowels of the earth. 
And great was the woe ; but the end was not yet. 
For still the Lord hardened their hearts. And He caused 
a bitter wind to blow, and the snow to fall from out the 
heavens, and a wailing arose in all the houses of the land. 
Yea, there was not a house where wailing was not heard. 
And behold there dwelt a mighty man in the land. His 
coffers were bursting with gold. Day and night his wells 
gushed forth oil, yea, with a great flood of oil gushed they 
forth. 

And the man cried, Behold as of old, Daniel the prophet 
read the writing on the wall, so do I now plainly read the 
work of the Lord in this. 

Even as the Philistines were delivered into the hands of 
Saul, so are these people delivered into my hands. 

And when they came to him, the rich and the poor, the 



widows and the fatherless, beseeching oil, because of the 
coal famine, he showed no mercy. All alike received no 
oil but at great price. Tea more, much more, than had 
been exacted in the time of plenty exacted he of them. 
From the rich and the poor, from the widows and the 
fatherless, exacted he alike, even to the uttermost farth- 
ing. And they that had no money went away empty-handed. 

And the riches of the man waxed more and more, his 
coffers were heaped high, yea, as high as the mountains. 

And because the hand of the Lord was plain, out of his 
great abundance the man builded halls and seats of learn- 
ing. And the fame of his name went forth into all the 
quarters of the earth. 

And daily in the temple he gave thanks to the Lord for 
His great mercy. ' 

**TTTHAT are you people in New York going to do about 
^ ^ , your inadequate transit system ? Are you getting 
ready to migrate? ** 

** Migrate ? No, dear man 1 There are three kinds of people 
in New York : Those who have lived in better places ; those 
who have lived in worse places, and those who have never 
lived any where else. The first can*t get back; the second 
won't go back, and the third don't know where to go. They 
will all hang by a strap and grin and bear it." 



204 



LIFE 




Harold and His Pa. 

* f "P a; I*ve got Bometbing 
-^ to own up to." 
*• All right— unburden 

yourself." 



^^'^'^.^.- ** Will you scold 
me?" 
«*Not if you are real 
penitent. What have you been doing, 
anyway?" 

"Well, I haven't got my geography 
lesson right, and the teacher says I 
should study it more at home." 

"Your teacher is right. You 
mustn't be an ignoramus, my boy, no 
matter what else you are." 
"What is an ignoramus?" 
"Oh, anyone who doesn't know his 
lesson. A doctor may be an igno- 
ramus, or a member of the Senate, or 
even an expert in a popular murder 
case." 

"Gracious! I don't want to be one, 
pa, and I want you to help me. Will 
you tell me about geography?" 

"Of course, my dear boy. Just ask 
me what you want to know." 
"Well, pa, where is New York?" 
"It's situated on this first floor of 
the Waldorf-Astoria." 

"What's that? A country?" 
** No, it's a caravanserai." 
"Oh, my, what a word! What is a 
caravanserai?" 

"You wouldn't understand if I told 
you. It's a sort of a place of public 
Irreverence where people go who are 
too rich 'to live in homes. Ask me 
something easier." 

"All right. Tell me where Wash- 
ington is." 

'*It's a small hamlet, located at the 
foot of Wall Street." ' 

"Why, I thought it was a glorious 
capitol." 

"Yes, every four years — on election 
day — it's the most glorious capitol 
in the world. On other days it is 
what I have said." 

"How nice to know that. Now, 
pa, what part of the world is the 
United States in?" 

"It is in that part, my son, known 
as the Morgan belt, which extends 
from latitude 32 north to 32 south." 
"Is it very far from Boston?" 
• * What ? The United States ? ' ' 



"Yes." 

"Oh, no! It's just south of Boston. 
Boston people often visit the United 
States— when they come to New 
York." 

"And how about Chicago, pa? 
That's a place I have heard of." 

**Yes, my boy, every one has heard 
of Chicago, except the people who 
live In St. Louis. Chicago occupies 
the rest of the country." 
"How is that?" 

"I will explain. Tammany Hall, 
the Waldorf, Wall Street and the 
Standard Oil, together with Mr. 
Carnegie's house, occupy one part 
of the Morgan belt, and Chicago oc- 
cupies the rest." 

"Oh, my! I hope I shall remember 
all those names. But isn't Philadel- 
phia somewhere near Chicago?" 

"Oh, no. Philadelphia is about two 
hundred years away from Chicago." 
"But, pa, I thought every country 
had cities." 

"It has, my boy. That is one of its 
complaints. The State of New York, 
which is a sort of half country, has 
been troubled with Albany for some 
time, and The Morgan Belt, which is 
really a country in a way, has long 
had Kansas on the knee. It's hard 
to explain all these distinctions to 
your young mind, but remember what 
I have said, and some day you will 
understand." 
"But what is a city?" 
"A city is a collection of individ- 
uals banded together for mutual dis- 
comfort." 
"Is Brooklyn a city? " 
"Well, hardly. Brooklyn Is a polyga- 
mous trolley run, entirely surrounded 
by pressed brick." 

"And what Is a State?" 
"A State Is a large piece of wooded 
and cleared land, almost entirely cov- 
ered by mortgages and owned by 
politicians." 
"And what Is a country?" 
"Oh, any place where an Irishman 
or a Jew halls from." 

"Dear me, my head Is so full! I 
guess I have learned enough. My, 
but you are a great man! " 

"Thank you, my boy, I know some- 
thing. If you digest all I've told you, 
you will be at the head of your class." 
"That's so, pa. What a surprise I 
will be to my teacher." Tom Massan, 



In Praise of Tobacco. 

OF all the good things man has foand 
Scattered upon this planet roond, 
Tobacco surely holds its ground, — 

A weed delicious : 
No other green leaf yields so much 
Delight ; no flower has fragrance sach ; 
No plant, its virtue with a touch 
Of something vicious. 

A pipeful after breakfast when 

I read the morning paper ; then, 

At luncheon one small whiff again, — 

A tube of tissue : 
And, after dinner, a cigar, 
An easy chair beside the Jar 
Wherein the good Havanas are, 

Too close to miss you. 

Life is at best a journey brief, 
And Time pursues us like a thief. 
But if one cultivate the Leaf 

There is no hurry. 
A friend, it cheers one on the way. 
And helps to lengthen out the day, 
And keeps the hair from turning gray 

With care and worry. 

Virginia, Turkish, or Perique,— 

A puff of incense and a streak 

Of smoke that almost seems to speak 

In sweet aroma ! 
And may the good Tobacco last 
So long as we to life hold fast. 
Till Death, the old iconoclast. 

Brings his diploma ! 

Frank Dempster Sherman, 




ONE hopes that the CongregatioDal- 
ist clergyman of Chicago who has 
advised the Baptists, being pretty flush, 
to buy out the other churches and con- 
solidate them, is not in earnest. Chris- 
tianity is already beyond the reach of 
the very poor. If we were to go much 
higher, the Government would be 
forced, in order to protect the consumer, 
to seize and operate the churches, 
and that would be socialism. 



LIFE 



205 




'STBN IN LSNT SOME PBOrLS OOTfTINUl THBIR PRANKS.** 



i 



LIFE 





POOR LO SNATCHED BALDHEADED. 

Dr. DaYld Starr Jordan, President of the Leland 
Stanford, Jr., Uniyerslty, who has recently discov- 
ered a number of new varieties of flsb in the 
streams of Hawaii and the Philippines, is a great 
sportsman as well as a conscientious ichthyologist. 
As might be expected, he uses the most approved 
of modem rods and flies In flshli\^. 

"I have met some fishermen, even among profes- 
sional sportsmen, who prefer old-fashioned meth- 
ods," said Dr. Jordan, "and though the ancient 
story of the farmer's boy who catches fish with a 
bent pin fastened to a piece of twine where full- 
rigged sports from the city fall 'to get a bite bor- 
ders on the mythical, I have actually witnessed in- 
stances of success with back-number outfits where 
modern appliances failed to land the game. 

"One day in California I had had a remarkable 
run of luck, and that night as we sat around the 
camp-lire I took occasion to say that my success 
was due to the superior tie of flies I had used. 

" 'Ton may flatter yourself on the string you've 
brought fn to-day,' said an old fisherman who had 



;r^<=i^^oli5AvrMLv^ 



Joined our party, 'but let me tell you. Doctor, that 
I saw a Digger Indian catch more fish in an hour 
in this stream than you've landed all day with your 
fine files.' 

" 'What bait did he use?' I asked. 

" 'Live grasshoppers,' replied the old man, 'but 
he didn't impale them. From his head he would 
stoically pluck a hair and with it bind the strug- 
gling insect to the hook. Almost upon the instant 
that this bait struck the water a fish would leap for 
it. After landing him the Indian would calmly re- 
peat the performance of snatching a hair from his 
head and affixing a fresh grasshopper to the hook. 

" 'I became fascinated,' continued the narrator. 
'After the Indian had landed in quick succession a 
mighty string -of salmon trout he suddenly stopped. 
I called to him to go on with the exciting sport, 
but .he merely smiled grimly and pointed signifi- 
cantly :to his head.' 

" 'What was the matter with his head?' I 
asked," said Dr. Jordan. 

" 'He had plucked it bald,' replied the old man." 
— Saturday Evenitig Post. 



An English paper tells this story of how the 
Mad Mullah worked one of the "miracles" which 
drew many waverers to his banner: "An English 
man-of-war was sent to demonstrate off the coast, 
and at night threw a searchlight on to the Jungle- 
covered mountains. Abdullali was in hidhig there, 
and, knowing from his visits to Aden what it was 
that his followers hailed as a new star, told them 
that the light was seeking him. When the electric 
rays actually tflooded his encampment, he cried in 
triumph : 'Will you deny now that I am under the 
eye of Ood?' The Somali fell on their knees, beat 
the earth with their foreheads, and replied: Thou 
art truly the Elect, the Chosen, the Mullth, the 
Master. Our goods, our existence, our souls belong 
to thee. We place ourselves entirely at the dispo- 
sition of thy will.' A few weeks later came the 
news of the rising of some 4,000 of these SomtU;' 
— Exchange. 

Whom the politicians wish to destroy, thej 
'first nominate for President on the Democratic 
ticket. — Penn. Punch Botol. 



LiPi is for sale by all Newsdealers in Great Britain. The IntemaUonal News 
Company. Bream^s Building, Chancery Lane, London, E. C, England, AaniTB. 



Established 1823. 

WILSON 
WHISKEY 

That's All! 



THE WILSON DISTILLINO CO., 
Baltimore. Md. 



GOOD! BETTER IBESTl 




Insist on geftinq 




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NEW YORK. 



Two Sides 

Aside from the cheer and 
comfort it gives to life 

Hunter 
Whiskey 

is friendship's pledge in 
happy hours. 

Wm. Lakahav a Son. Baltimore, Hd. 




BLACK. STARR ^M 
FR.OST, 

458 FIFTH AVE„ NEW YORK. 

PRECIOUS 

STONES. 



MAl^LEWOOD 

NBAR CINCINNATI, OHIO. 

A Sanatorlnm established in 1876 for the pri- 
vate care and medical trtotment of Drue 
and Alcoholic Addlrtlun*. Tbon- 
Rands having failed elsewhere have been cnred 
by ns. Home Treatnieiit If Desired* 
Address Tee Db. J. L. Stbpbbns Co., 
Dep. 77, Lebanon, 0. 



bronchial Trochee 

Promptly Relieve Coaghs, Hoarwne* 
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Nothing excels this simple remedy. 



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TffB LATEST SUCCESS OF THE 
ORIZA-PERFUMERY (Grand Friz Paris 1900) 



LIFE 




E^gyptian 
Deities 





Master thinks Im a dandy 
at mixing cocktails^ 

@:ktails 

V|^¥ T ca-n do it 

Jl \J \J }ust as well 



Po\ir over lumps oi Ice. •tra.ln e^nd servo 

SEVEN KINDS BEWARE OF IMJTATIONS 

C. F. HEUBLEIN (Si BRO. 

HARTFORD NEW YOR.K LONDON 



MORTON TRUST COMPANY 

}8 Nassau Street, New York 

Capital, $2,000,000 

Sorplos and UndlTlded Proflts, $5,815,982 

OFFICERS: 

LEVI P. MORTON, President 

THOMAS P. RYAN, Vice-President 

JAMES K. CORBIERE.Sd Vice-Prest. 
H. M. PRANCIS. Secretary 

G. L. WILMBRDING. Asst. Secretary 

H. B. BERRY, Trust Officer 

EXECUTIVE COMMITTEE : 

- L6T1 P. Morron Joseph C. Hendriz 

Thomas P. Ryan JamfS N. Jarvie 

Bdvrard J. Berwind Georirp Poster Peabody 
G. G. Haven Jacob H. Sctaiff 

WilUam C. Whitney 



WASSERMANN BROTHERS 

STOCK BROKERS 

40 EXCHANGE PUCE. NEW YORK 

Memben of New York Stock Exchange 



BRANCH OFFICES: 

753 Fifth Avenne (Plaza Bank). 

Windsor Arcade, corner 46th St. and 5th Aye. 

Astor Court ( Waldorf-Astoria Hotel). 

Imperial Hotel. 

5 West 20th St., opposite Martinis Restaorant. 

Flf lb Avenue Hotel. 




99 per cent of a Camera^s Value 
is in the Lens 

One paU only in a ramrra la respcm^lble 

That's Lhe Lens. A poor kfis cannot tnake 
a perfect jiicture tvcii fay atcideiiL 

The Goerz Lens 

ii used by ihe leading pholog^riiphcrSj 
amateur and prof ess lunal , m every fDUiilry. 
M vtur dfjilcrs or direct. Wiitt for 
descriptive catalogue. 



Sweet Sentences are Best 
Punctuated with Periods of 

WHITMAN'S 



Chocolates a^d 
Confections I 

Vat *.^l»i p^^rT^lsH'rr. 

WHITMAN'S 

, Inatantaneoufl^ 
Chocolattr* 

t\\C Pflh-* iiM-lniJl 
i>f (Iriiklc*. 

II in ri.»4in«4 hk. 



t?v 



^Sl 



D 




Pure 

Habana 

Segars— 

Always 

Mild 

And 

Aromatic 



Mak.de In the old-fa.shioned honest 
way of Pure HabeLna. Tobacco 
delightfully blended 



Look for the Bull 
Dog on eetch Box 



J°Kn W. MerrieLiTV &, Co. 

The R.ovcroft SegaLr Shop, which 
is "At the Sign of the Bull Dog" 
^NEW YORK 



LIFE 



V9NTEMP0. 




Mybb: In olden time it is said that it was pos- 
sible for a man to render himself invisible. 

Otbb : Pshaw ! That's not at all remarkable. 
Men in this country are doing it every day. 

"Ton don't tell me! How do they manage it?" 

"By marrying famous women.'" — Chicago News. 

Fob convenience, really superior hotel service 
for select patronage, and climate, there is nothing 
for New Yorkers quite like Lakewood, New Jersey. 
Laurel. House. 
LAUREL.-IN-THE- Pines. 

t/ The Eufaula Journal, speaking of a rival paper, 
says : *< If the brains of the editor were of dyna- 
mite they would be insufflolent to blow his hat over 
his eyes." — Kansas City Journal, 

Old Point Comfort, Va. Charming army at- 
mosphere and largest Fort. Turn soldier. Half a 
loaf is better than staying at home. Send to the 
Chamberlin for booklet. 

Bthbl : A sixteen-page letter from George ! 
Why, what on earth does he say? 

Mabbl: He says he loves me. — Pittsburg Dis- 
patch. 

HOTEL VENDOME. BOSTON. 
All the attractions of hotel life, with the com- 
forts and privacy of home. 

SWBLL (to small boy): What are you crying for, 
my little man? 

8MAIX. Boy: Because you are sitting on my 
tart. 

CALIFORNIA IN LESS THAN THREE DAYS 
TiA Chicago and North-Westem, Union Pacific, and 
Southern Pacific Railways from Chicago. The elec- 
tric-lighted "Overland Limited" provides the best 
of everything. Diversity of routes; finest scenery. 
Compartment observation cars, buffet-library cars 
(with barber and bath) ; dining cars. All agents 
sell tickets via this route. 

Thacber: What is a farm? 
Bbioht Little Girl: A piece of land entirely 
covered by a mortgage. — Detroit Free Press. 

Sport8Xan*8 Show, 

ICadison Square Garden, 

February 21st to March 7th. 

Admission 60 cents. 

"Sat, our backbones are like serial stories, 
aren't they?" 
•*t»rove it." 

"Continued in our necks." — Harvard Lampoon. 

Oliar complexion indicates pure blood— result from 
use of Abbou% the Original Angostura Bitters. 

V " Waitkb, bring me a deml." 

"Yes, sir, tasse or John?" — Philadelphia Record. 

I>0N*T be hoodwinked into drinking another Cham- 
pagne. Oook's Imperial Extra Dry la the proper wine. 

"You say his wife's a brunette? I thought he 
married a blonde." 

"He did, but she dyed." — Wrinkle. 

As a winter resort for fishermen, Palm Beach has no 
equal. Joe JefDerson and other pereons of note, who have 
the means to go anywhere that fancy dictates and enjoy- 
ment may allure, find the best fishing for winter to be in 
Lake Worth and offttie ocean pier, or from craft put at sea. 
The catches of klngfish, taken every day throughout the 
season in the past, have been extraordinary. 

Husband (irritably) : It isn't a year since you 
said you believed our marriage was made in heaven, 
and yet you order me around as if I wasn't anybody. 

Wife (calmly) : Order is heaven's first law. — 
New York Weekly. 




Portland, Oregon— In 



Four Days from New York or Boston-By New York Central. 



LIFE 



TOURS TO LOS ANGELES 

ON ACX^OUITT OF THS 

Presbyterian General Assembly. 



lender like PersonallyCondncted System 
of the PennsylTanla Railroad. 

For the Presbyterian General Awembly at Lo8 Angeles, 
Cal., i\Iay 21 to June 1, the Pennsylvania Railroad Company 
hat* arrangi^ tlireo trons-contiuciital tours at extraordinarily 
low rates. Special trains of high-grade Pullman equipment 
will be run on desirable schedules. A Tourist Agent, Chap- 
eron, Official Stenographer, and Special Baggage Master 
will accompany each train to promote the comfort and 
pleasure of the tourists. All Sunday travel will be avoided. 

The Pmnsylvania RaUroad is the only railroad that itiU 
run toure to Lo§ AngiUs on this occasion under its own 
Bsrtion ally -Conducted System. 

No. 1. Assembly Toub. 

Special train of baggage, Pullman dicing and drawing- 
room sleeping cars will leave New York May 18, going via 
Chicago, Denver, and the Royal Gorge, stopping at Cfolorado 
Springs, Salt Lake City, and San Francisco, arriving Loj' 
Angeles May 90 ; leaving Los Angeles, returning, June 1, via 
the Santa Fe route and Chicago ; arriving New York June 5. 
Ronnd trip rate, including transportation, Pullman accom- 
modations, and meals on special train, $134.50 from 
New York, $132.75 from Philadelphia, $128.75 from 
Baltimore and Washington, $120.00 from Pittsburg, and 
proportionate rates from other points. 

Tickets for this tour, covering all features until arrival at 
Los Angeles, with transportation only returning independ- 
ently on regular trains via going route. New Orleans, or 
Ogden and St. Louis, and good to stop off at authorized 
Western points, will be sold at rate of $109.50 from New 
York, $107.75 from Philadelphia, $104.75 from BalU- 
more and Washington, $08.00 from Pittsburg ; returning 
via Portland, $11 .00 more. 

No, 2. Yellowstone Park Tour. 

Special train of baggage, Pullman dining, dra\ving-r(X>m 
sleeping, and observation cars will leave New York May 12, 
going via Chicago, Denver, Colorado Springs, and Salt Lake 
City, with stops en route^ arriving Los Angeles May 20 ; re- 
tarning, leave Los Angeles June 1, via Santa Barbara, San 
Jose, San Francisco, Seattle, and St. Paul, with stops en 
route and a complete tour 9f Yellowstone Park ; arriving 
New York June 28. Rale, including all necef*sary expenses 
except hotel accommodations in Los Angeles and San 
Francisco, $253.00 from New York, $251.25 from 
Philadelphia, $249.25 from Baltimore and Washington, 
$844.00 from Pittsburg, and proportionate rates from 
other }>oint8. 

No. 8. Home Mission Tour. 

Special train of baggage, Pullman dining and drawing- 
room sleeping cars will leave New York May 13, going via 
Chicago and Santa Fe Route, Grand Canon of Arizona, 
and Riverside, arriving Los Angeles May 20, leaving Los 
Angeles, returning, June 1 via Santa Barbara, San Fran- 
ciaco. Salt Lake City, Royal Gorge, and Denver, arriving 
New York June 11. Rate, including all necessary expenses 
except hotel accommodations in Los Angeles and San Fran- 
daco, $169.00 from New York, $156.75 from Phila- 
delphia, $152.75 from Baltimore and Washington, 
$144.50 from Pittsburg, and proportionate rates from 
other points. 

Tickets for this tour, covering all features until arrival 
at Lo« Angeles and transportation only returning independ- 
ently via direct routes with authorized »U^p overs, will be 
Bold at rate $121.00 from New York, $1 18.60 from 
Philadelphia, $116.00 from Baltimore and Washington, 
$llO.00 from Pittsburg; returning via Portland, 
$11.00 more. 

The tours outlined above have the Indorsement of the 
officers of the Presbjrterian General A8j»embly, and are de- 
ttign^d to meet the requirements of those attending the Gen- 
eral Assembly as well as those desiring to vinit the Pacific 
Coaf^t at a minimum expense. 

Detailed itinerary is now In conrne of preparation. Apply 
to Geo, W. Boyd, Assistant General Passenger Agent, Broad 
Street Sration, Philadelphia. 




y o h n Dew a 7 



PLIRTH, SCOTLAND 
LOXDON, ENGLAND 




Scotcb MbUkii 
Bietlllers 



IRKDERICK GLASS UP 
S^ifAgintffjr fAe £7.5^ New York 



The only PURE and COBRKCT ARTIFICIAL 
MINERAL WATERS sold in America to-day. 

CARBONIC, ARTIFICIAL VICHY, 
SELTERS, CLUB SODA, Etc., 

are also put up In bottles for out of town 
delivery, and can be sent by freight or 
express to any part of the Inited States. 

""'^"" CARL H. $CHULTZ 

TeL 8420 Madison Sq. 430-444 First Ave., N. T. 



THE CITY OF NEW YORK, 

DEPARTMENT OF TAXES AND ASSESSMENTS, 

MAIN OFFICE. HOROUGH OF MANHATTAN, 

NO. 280 BROADWAY, STEWART BU1L.D1NG, 

Janitry 12. 1903. 
NOTICE IS HEREBY GIVEN. AS REQUIRED 
by the Greater New York Charter, that the books 
called "The Annual Record of the Asseseed Valuation 
of Real and Personal Estate of the BorouKha of Man- 
hattan, The Bronx, Brooklyn. Queens and Richmond, 
comprlslnjc The City of New York," will be open for 
examination and correction on the second Monday of 
January, und will remain open uatil the 

1ST DAY OF APRIL, 1003. 

During the time that the books are open to public 
inspeclion. application may be made by any person 
or corporation claiming to be aggrieved by the as- 
sessed valuatioh of real or personal estate to have the 
ftame corrected. 

In the Borough of Manhattan, at the main office of 
the Department of Taxes and AsseBsments, No. 280 
Broadway. 

In the Borough of The Bronx, at the office of the 
Department, Municipal Building, One Hundred and 
Seventy-seventh Street and Third Avenue. 

In the Borough of Brooklyn, at the orHie of the De- 
parnnont. Municipal Building. 

In the Borough of Queens, at the office of the De- 
partment. Hackett Building. Jackson Avenue ami 
Fifth Street, Long Island City. 

In the Borough of Richmond, at the office of the 
Department, Masonic Building, Stapleton. 

Corporations in all the Boroughs must make appli- 
cation only at the main office In the Bon>ugli of Man- 
hattan. 

Applications In relation to the assessed valuation of 
pergonal estate must be made by the person assessed 
at the office of the Department In the Borough where 
such person resides, and in the case of a non-resident 
carrying on business in The City of New York, at 
the office of the Department of the Borough where such 
place of business is located between the hours of 10 
A. M. and 2 P. M., except on Saturday, when all ap- 
plications must be made between 10 A. M. and 12 
noon. JAMES L. WELI^. President, 

WILLIAM S. COGSWELL, 
GEORGE J. GILLESPIE. 
SAMUEL STRASBOURGER, 
RUFITS L. SCOTT, 
Commtesloners of Taxes and Asseasments. 




Rare Old Violins 

B I^rtf««t and finest ei:>] Itwt ion on t Ji In eoutlnciiit. 
cAin[»ritiiiiK (bi* cofup^KtA dHlvhrmihl llitwinjr 
ftallffcUon. FLiitt catHloiiiie <frfl*i corvtsJn^iiff 
m f n<s» I rti i Id* 1 p bu l« i n cci tnj m aa d H 3 okfh i ill [ ^ 1 
ft I J thv not «d m Hk«rv. L i«r and ua rt i cd I tir^ o t 
t^oln i I if^tFit m Ttn rn t m m t Fu I to |1 rt Joi M ontiUy 
^^irrD^Rtti moy lpe arrnnHHct- Vinlinn m>Bt on 

of tIbD n i tt nnff'HH v,\ih i-nch UkF^irmnFnt 

15 Ai*mt St. 
Chlcatt. 



LYON & MEALY. 



londondcmi 

IITHIA 
WAT£R 



The first thing | 
in the morning — ^ 
a gl:iss of pure, sparkling I 
Londonderry will quench 
thirst as nothing else can and 
tone up the sptem so that 
its benefits will be felt all | 
day long. 



©LO eR©W RYE 



A 
STRAIGHT 



WHISKEY 



H. B. KIRK & CO., 
SOLE BOTTLERS, NEW YORK, 



LIFE 



■ III I III I III I M I M III ■ III ■ III 




c chartreuse! 




A Dainty Sip 



IS 



CHARTREUSE 

— ORBEN AND YBLLOW^ 



AND A FITTING FINALE TO 
THE BEST OP DINNERS. IT 
DELIGHTS AND ENRICHES 
SOCIAL HOSPITALITY 

At firii<l*M Wine Mereluinta,Orocen,Hotoli,Caf£i. 
liJltjer & Co., 45 Broadway, New York, N.Y., 

Sole Agenu for United SUtes. I 



i AgenU i 



♦Ill- 



Importations for 1902 of 

G. n. MUMM & Co/s 
Extra Dry 

were 407 , 304 bottles 
more than any other brands 

The Famous 1898 Vintage of Mumm*s Extra 

Dry, now arriving, is destined to make 
L a still more emphatic increase. 



The Yale Seal 

In embossed gilded 
bniBS, with colors en- 
ameled ^ a perfect fac- 
simile of original. 
Mounted on Flemish 
Oak shield. Size, 10>i^x 
13U Inches. 

Delivered ansrwliere 
on receipt of S2. 60* 

Also, aeals of BArrard, 
Princeton, PennflTlvania, 
Oolumbia and Cornell, 
mounted the same way, at 
same price, or complete 
set of six for 913.00. 

Jnat the thinfir for Den 
decorationa. 
Circular vhowlng seal in colon 
mailed on request. 

Ul H.SHERMAN &C0., 27 Soatliiltli St., Pliil«deiplii« 




A Comparison. 

Bass* Ale is never bottled by its brewers, 
but is sold in bulK to iiirtependeii t Iwttlers, 
who affix to the bottles their own dis- 
tinguishinf? labels. 

Evans' Ale 

Is Bottled at the Brewery 

by its makers, who know pnxjisely when 
and how to handle it. and who preciously 
l^uhTd the goodness of the brewing 
against danger from outside bottling. If 
it is not just right it is not bottled; that's 
why it's always brilliant and clear and 
absolutely without sediment and the 

Best Ale in the World. 




Accept no substitute 
use only the genuine 

MURRAY A 
LANMAN'S 
FLORIDA 
WATER 

For the Handkerchief, 
Dressing-table and Bath. 



The Prudential Insurance Company of America, 
with its characteristic promptness, has paid all the 
policies carried by that company on the lives of 
those persons killed in the New Jersey Central 
Railroad disaster near Westfleld on January 27. 
Of the twenty-four persons killed, six had policies 
in that company, which Immediately upon learning 
of the accident notified its representatives located at 
Plainfleld to hasten in every way possible the filing 
of proofs of death in order to expedite the payment 
of the Insurance money to the afflicted families. 
An idea as to how vague were the means of identi- 
fication may be had from the fact that the com- 
pany ordered the money paid on the life of one vic- 
tim of whom nothing was recognizable but the fill- 
ings of his teeth, which were identified by a local 
dentist. 




Rae's Lucca 

Olive Oil 

appreciated by connoisseurs 
for its 

Delicate Flavor 



(No rank smell nor taste, so frequent in 
some brands of Olive Oil.) 

Quaninteed Pure Oil of Olives 
. . . oniy . . • 

S. R.AE & CO. 

(Estahlished 18S€) 

LEGHORN* ITALY 



TELL5 THE l>rsrANCe EXACTLV 



M* 1ST lJ*dlrittTrnirnafivtuni(> ]-^\-'}MSilbf rh««TAlujx«f O^e 
' * Vt.^f€l«r CM]<im{<-lvi- imd tu it un >«at- tiIiicJ*, *o t 

■.\'U' i n II 1 1 IT tn't*\ pim foi *%-*ryihlDit r httuM^ the n . 
■ ^ (TM ►! I P I c. Ij f ir^ oc *^ji' fv. I n iT> rnt'rl tm stal* o i44Ui;4«t 

VIIMR IJJ. CD ^ 7 UntiLi Strftfft, Eart&Td. Cflnn. 
Mnk^'i-if flfCy*' loin' tor*. itdoinrt^TTi, TadicisniHU^rKy 



©6e WINTER. 
R.ESORTS 

Texas 

Mexico and 

CalifonvioL 

•re l>eet readied fron 5T. LOUIS 
vie 

Iron Mountain 



R.oute 



The direct line to 

HOT SPRINGS, ARKANSAS 



Eiesent equipment Cafe dininflf cars 

Meaie a la carte 

Bxcnrsion Tickets on sale 

Write for bookleU 

W. E. HOYT 

Ciencral F^astern I^hhs. Agent 

335 imOADWAY, NKW YORK 

H. C TOWNSEND 

Gen. Pass. & Tk*t Agt., St. Loma, Mo. 



Eczema 

Saft Rheum, Ringworm, Itch, 



Acne or other skin troubles, 
promptly relieved and cured by 

HydrozoiK 

This scientific germicide. which 
is harmless, cures by killins: 
disease germs. Used and 
endorsed by the medical 
profession everywhere. Sold 
by leading druggists. If not 
at yours, send 25 cents for a 
trial tottle. The genuine bears 
my signature. Accept no 
substitutes. Address 

wBKv /Vnlnmble Booklet on tke 
■^■'■■' \tr*»ntiiient of dlae«M»a. 



LIFE 




^ CIG ARETIE5 

A J1Ara>ARD0r 

EXQCLLCNCC IMSURPAJJED 



THE lUTDAL LIFE INSURANCE 

COMPANY OF NEW YORK 

RICHARD A. McCURDY President 

STATBnENT 
For the year •ndlng Dectmber 31 , 1902 

Acoordins to the Standard of the Insurance 
DeparUnent of the State of Mew York 



INCOME. 



lt0MlTed for Pninlanifl 
From all other SoarcM 



. $66,874,069 IS 
. 16,460,960 69 

$7»,606,0g> 74 



DISBUBSEKEKTS. 



To Poliej-bolders for Clatms hj 
Death 

To Policy-holders for Eadow- 
■eats. DiTtdeads, ete. - 

For all other Aecoaats 



$17,629,466 61 

11,6M,201 60 
15,040,660 47 



$44.160,807 68 



$820,140,806 02 

81,666,684 60 

10,278,000 00 
14,620,874 79 



ASSETS 

Uaited States Boads aad otheir 
Seearltles . - - ^ 

First Ltea Loaas on Boad and 
Mortyaae > . . ■ 

Loaas on Bonds aad other Se- 
earltles .... 

IioanN on Company's own Policies 

Beal EnUte: Conipaajr's Ofllee 
Bnlldinini ta Ixindon. Paris, 
Berlin, New York, Boston, 
PhlUdelplila, San Prtnolsro, 
Seattle, Sydney and Mexico, - 
and other Beal Entate • - 82,888,828 46 

Gash la Banks and Trust Com- 
panies 16,677,926 78 

leerned Interest, Net Deferred 

PremtnmH,et€« • - 7,816,666 66 

$382,482,681 80 

LUBIUTIES 
Policy Reserves, etc. - - $314,298,468 19 
Coating eat Oaarantee Fund 
ATsllable for Authorized OItI 
deads • • . 



. 66,110,228 II 

8,020,000 00 

$882,482,681 80 

Insarance aad Aaaaltles la 

force - . - . $1 ,842,912,062 81 

I have carefully examined the foregoing State- 
ment and find the same to be correct ; liabilitiea 
calculated by the Insurance Department. 

Chaklbs A. Prkllbb. Auditor 



ROBERT A. QRANNISS Vice-Premocnt 



Walter R. Giixettb 
Isaac F. I^loyd 
John A. Fonda 
Frederic Cromwell 
Bmorv McClintock 



General Manager 

ad Vice-President 

8d Vice-President 

Treasurer 

Actuary 







The On$ in Front : buret and shoot I hubbt up I 

** GBB I BUT I CAM*T BBAOH FAB ENOUGH I * 




Guaranty Trust Co» of New York 



nata#l_I«|fe JBjilldlnH:* 

STREET. 



NASSAU. CORNER CEDAR 
liONIION OFFICBS 83 LOMBARD ST., £. C. 



00 ST. JAMES ST., S. W. 



FlMtl Ag*ntt off the 
United States Qevernaent. 



} 



Manila, Philippine Islands. 
Noeg Kong, China. 



} 



Depository off the Government off 
the Philippine Islands. Manila. 



Capital, $2,000,000 Sarplns and UndlT lded Profits, $5,369,000 

INTMMEBT AULOWMD ON DMPOSIT8 SUBJECT TO CHEQUE OR ON CERTIFICATE. 

Acts aa Trastee for Oorporatloiifl. Finns and IndlYidnals : and as Qnardian. Executor and Administrator; 
Takes entire charge of Real and Penonal Estates ; careniily aeieoted aeconues offered for InTesonent. 

TRAVELERS* LETTERS OP CREDIT AVAILABLE IN ALL PARTS OP THE WORLD. 
COMMERCIAL LETTERS OP CREDIT ISSUED. 

BB AFTS on ail parts of Great Britain, France, Qermany, China and Philippines BOUGHT and SOI<B« 

WALTER G. OAKMAN, PreaidenL ADRIAN ISELIN. JR., Vice-President. 

GEORGE R. TCTRNBULL. ad Vioe-Prest. HENRT A. MURRAY, 8d Vice-President 

WM. C. EDWARDS. Treasurer. JOHN GAULT. Manager Foreign Department. 

E. C. HEBBARD, Secretary. F. C. HARRIMAN, Assistant Treasurer. 

R, C. NEWTON, Trust Officer. 

BIBEOTOBS: 

George F. Baker, R. Somers Hayee, Levi P. Morton, 

George S. Bowdoln, Edwin Uawley, • Alexander E. Orr, 

August Belmont, Charles R. Henderson. Walter G. Oakman, 

Frederic OromweU, Adrian Iselin.jr.. Henry H. Rogers, 

Walter R. Gillette, Augustus D. JuUllard, H. McK.-TwomtMy, 

G. G. Hayen. James N. Jarrle. Frederick W. Vanderbilt, 

£. H. Harrlman, Richard A. McCnrdy, Harry Payne Wbltney. 

London Committee t ARTHUR J. FBASER, Chairman; DONALD C. HALDEMAN. 



DOMINION LINE toEUROPE 




Boston to gtftenstown and Livarpool 

^^, Commonwealtli^ 13^1100 
»5i. T^ew Kll«]alkd, Il,IOI>tODa 
», Cntinila, . 10,000 I *»n« 

S, ^. inerlcin, * 11,03.1 to u^ 
MEDITERRAMEAfl SERVICE 
'jnnorw timet to Azor^iit dhrallmr, 
Alirff?r»,lMeinm, ^faplea^ui'l At^x* 
A u d r J a * St-^ii^ i for 11 1 qp i m L^d Ht H.^k i^ -t 
DOMINION LINE 
rr stjile street, - Boston 
fi^i Dearborn Street, Chicago 
lias Broadway, - 2iEW Yubk 




LIFE 



Santa Fe 

all the Way 

You leave Chicago on the Califor- 
nia Limited. In less than three 
days you are in California. It's 
Santa Fe all the way — train, track 
and management. 

Shortest line, Chicago to Los Angeles and San Diego. 
A direct route to San Francisco. Only line to Grand Can- 
yon of Arizona. 

Money cannot provide a finer train. Think of a travel 
comfort : here ii is. Cosy compartment Pullmans, sunny 
observation parlor, a well-selected library, electric lights; 
also buffet-smoking car, with barber shop and daily stock 
reports. But the crown of it all is the dining-car serv- 
ice — Harvey's best, which is best in the world. Cqn- 
vincing facts in booklets. 

Our other daily trains to California carry standard 
Pullmans, tourist sleepers and chair cars. 



Atdiisoo. 
Topeli« & 
Santa Fa 
Railway. 



Santa Fe 



oanaral 



Office, 




(JIBSON PLAT^ 



i^^M 



■. .'K 



. K 



^^*OJ 



*L\ft* 



CHAHLi:S DANA GIBSON'S 1 

PICTURES ON CHINA. 

This iA one of th« twenty-four sub}«t5 ] 
from wbicb you can make yotir stleciiod. 
Each plate is JO^^ iDchtsin siie, and «ihows ] 
an cjract reproduction of a Gibson picture 
direct from the original draiwif>g of the : 
artJEt. The plates are gr nujoe Doulton por- 
oebm, with rich decorative border Ctin- 
in flow btue. At aU siore?^, each - ^VC. 

If your dealer cannot supply you. mention 
his name and send price direct, wi4b 35c. 
e]itra fur poiiiji^^e. 

GEO. F. BASSETT dL CO. 
Dopt* U, 49 BftfcUy St.. New Vork^ 

A beaucfful ^nite iouk, Ahuwinv twenty^aor 
03(1*00 subjects, beauuEuUy pnnied iu i^Cflora, 
sunt for Cc, 10 cover com pJ postngs. 



Fancy Apples 

from the famous Lake Shore 

section of Western New York. 

Kiivs, Baldwins, Qreenin^, Northern 

Spys* Russets, Spftzenboiip, 

SeelL-no-furthers, Etc. 

Delivered at your door for I3.00 per 

box, all charges prepaid to points east of 

the Mississippi river and north of the 

Ohio. 

Boxes contain about one bushel, 
according to size and variety. Each 
apple carefully selected, wrapped In 
paper and perfectly packed. In single 
varieties or assorted. 

Fancy Evaporated Apples 

prepared and packed by us, suitable for 
sauces, pics, etc. Will keep indefinitely. 
Directions inside. 25-lb. box, I3.50, 
50-lb. box, I6.00. Charges prepaid as 
above. 

Money rt/unded if not tu w* xtaU, We are the 
l^rgftt individual skippers of apples in the United 
States, Our cold storage capacity is soofloo barrels, 

EM.Upton&Co.Hilton,N.Y. 

MiKaaor tmk j. w. phatt eo.. nkw your. 




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VOLUME XLI. 



NEW YORK. MARCH 1 2. 1903 

Kmercrt «, ,he jr,, ,,„, ^,^, „„,^, ^ .s,..„„.,,„^ ^^, 



U-fJ^.r p 



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UNDKIt TKC ACT OF IQRU 



LIFE 



1 



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YES 

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BUT 

it is always well to seen re the best yon 
can for the money- 

THEREFORE 

Yon shun Id bear in mind tliis remark 
of an experienced traveler : 

*' For the rxciUtmce of tfs tracls, ike spedi cf iis irams, Ikf 
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Sent! t^i Gct^Tfre H. hanieU, General Pia&Mng«r Agent* Orand CeFilratSwiwA 
Xew York, a 'i-^:^cm si£iJfn|r taf « vi-piige illuatrat^ Catalufuis t»l Ihtf 'Kvnf' 



-u 



LIFE 



^UaKfin^otn the Enetny^ 



In a Western State, whose laws provide for a 
jury of six in suits before Justices of the peace, a 
German was elected to that high and honorable of- 
fice. The old gentleman was naturally smart, and, 
being prosperous, was something of an oracle in 
the neighborhood ; but laW was a thing he knew as 
little about as most of his predecessors and suc- 
cessors of the J. P. genus. 

When his first case came on he listened with 
reasonable attention to the evidence, but with 
wrapt interest to the arguments of counsel for both 
plaintift and defendant. 

When the arguments were closed he appeared 
very ill at ease, and not until reminded that it was 
his duty to charge the jury did he ofTer any sug- 
gestion touching the case in hand. But he came up 
to the situation that confronted him like a man 
and a Judge. 

"Oentlemens of der tschury," he said, "as dis ist 
mein first oxberience in tschargin' a tschury, I 
hartly knows vat do say do you. But as eet ist 
mein tuty to tscharge you somedings I vill do der 
pest vat I knows how. 

"Bef you peleeves all vat der lawyer for der 
blaintlfr haf said, den I tscharge you dot eet is 
your tuty to find your ferdict for de blaintiff, und 
assess hees tamages as you dink righdt, not do ox* 
seet five huntret tollars and der cosdts, vich you 
must nod verged. 

"But eef, on der odder hant, you peleeves all 
vat der tefendant's lawyer haf saidt, den eet ees 
your tuty to flnt for der tefendant. In dot case 
you vill tschust do Id, und say nodlngs apoud it, 
oxcepdlng der costs, vich you moost nod vorged. 

"But, tschendlemens, if on der odder hant, you 
are ligke me apout dis maddter. unt dondt peleeve 
a tamt vort vat eider one off dem haf saidt, den I 
doan' know vot in der hell you are goin' ter to." — 
Oreen Bag. 



Not long ago a lady was choosing a winter hat, 
with the usual uncertainty of mind as to the kind 
of hat she wanted, or whether, indeed, she wanted 
a hat at all. After trying on nearly every model 
in the shop she pounced with glee on one she had 
overlooked. "Here's something pretty!" she said; 
"why did you not show me this before?" Without 
waiting for an answer, she appealed to her patient 
friend. "There's some style about this, isn't there? 
How do I look?" The friend distinctly sniffed. "It 
makes you look a hundred, and it's very dowdy," 
she said. The other tried the hat at another angle. 
"It is rather dowdy," she admitted at this Juncture : 
"perhaps I won't risk it after all." A voice from 
behind her made its' third attempt to gain a hear- 
ing. "If you've quite done with my. hat," it said, 
very bitterly, "I should rather like to put it on." — 
Argonaut, 

It IS told of the late Senator Matt Carpenter 
that one day while chatting with friends in a com- 
mittee room the conversation turned on the relative 
merits of religious sects. Nearly every member of 
the party belonged to some church and there had 
been an animated discussion, .Senator Carpenter 
pacing up and down, listening intently enough, but 
saying not a word. 

"What church do you belong to. Carpenter?" 
asked one. 

"I do&'t belong to any." 

"Why don't you Join one?" 

"I don't want to. None exactly suits my views." 

"What one would you Join, if you were to feel 
forced to a choice?" 

"The Catholic, by all means." 

"And why the Catholic?" 

"Because they have a purgatory, and that's a 
motion for a new trial." — The Omaha Bee. 



As A sergeant was bawling out hit orders in a 
barracks in Dublin and watching the line of feet 
as the new recruits endeavored to obey the word of 
command, he found to his astonishment that ona 
pair of feet, more noticeable on account of their 
extra large size, never turned. 

Without taking his eyes oft those feet, the aer- 
geant bawled out a second order : 

"About face." 

He could see that all the feet except those ha 
watched turned in obedience. Rushing up to the 
owner, a little fellow, he seized him by the shoul- 
der, shouting: 

"Why don't you turn with the rest?" 

"I did!" replied the trembling recruit 

"Tou did. eh? Well, I watched your feet and 
they never moved." 

"It's the boots they gave me, sir," said the poor 
fellow. "They're so large that when I turn my feet 
turns inside of them." — Dublin News. 



Platwbight: That villain In my play doesn't 
act his part up to the lines. He must wear a look 
of worry and desperation. 

Manaqeb : Oh ! don't get excited. I'll fix that. 
John, go up on the stage and start a riunor that I 
have skipped with the box-offlce receipts. — Balti- 
more New8, 



Mbs. Nextdoob: Your daughter has improved 
wonderfully in her piano playing. 

Mbs. Homxb: Vm glad to hear you say so — if 
you are really sincere. 

"Why, what do you mean?" 

"Well, you see, we didn't know whether she was 
improving or whether we were merely getting used 
to it." — Chicago Daily News. 



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Vice-President— JOSIAH QUINCY, of Boston. 
Sect and Tbeas'b— A. S. WITHERBEE. 



A. 



Far full particulars address 

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LIFE 




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LIFE 



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215 



A Toast. 



HTN the whole city 

-■- None can match Kitty, 

Pretty and witty 

And jolly and free ; 
From old Killamey 
Bringing her blarney 
Over to Barney 

Whose sweetheart is she. 



Each cheek a rose is 
Sure, and her nose is, 
That, I suppose, is 

An Irish bouquet. 
Let me caress them, 
Kiss them and press them, 
Kitty — God bless them ! — 

On St. Patrick's Day. 



Fill up the glass now. 
Let the words pass now : 
Drink to the lass now 

And shamrock divine I 
This be the toast of 
Him who thinks most of 
Kitty :— I boast of 

That honor as mine. 



Sure there was never 
Qirl half so clever. 
Kitty forever I 

Drink up, lads, and then 
While we grow frisky, 
Though it seem risky, 
If there's more whisky 

We'll toast her again I 

Felix Carmen, 




* GOING DOWN FOR THK THIRD TIXB/ 



2t« 



LIFE 




jear, and much is going to happen 
before then. 



* * While there is Life there's Hope:' 

VOL. XLl. MARCH 12, 1908. No. 10fl3. 

19 Wmt Thirty-Fibst St.. N«w York. 



Published every Thursday. $&00 a year In ad- 
Tanoe. Postacre to foreign countries in the Posul 
Union, $1.04 a year extra, (tlnflle current copies, 
10 cents. Back numbers, after three months from 
date of publication. 26 cents. 

No contribution will be returned unless 
accompanied by stamped and addressed 
envelope. 

The illustrations in Life are copyrighted, 
and are not to be reproduced. 

Prompt notification should be sent by sub- 
scribers of any change of address. 



LAWS 

or the: 
STATE or 




T TNDER the patron- 
^ age of the Presi- 



dent "race-snicide" 
and the negro problem 
are having a great run 
as topics of discourse. 
Race-suicide is the 
easier topic. Anyone 
can discnss that. The 
few facts that are nec- 
essary are easily come 
by. It is a matter that 
concerns every family, 
and is of universal in- 
terest; no wonder it 
is profusely consid- 
^ered. The future of 
the American negro 
is also easy to talk 
about, but the talk is not worth much 
unless it is based on knowledge that is 
soimd and wide. Sentimental con- 
sideration of the problem is worthless, 
and a very large part of the letters the 
newspapers print on both sides of the 
question are sentimental. 

There are signs, by the way, that the 
race issue is being magnified just now 
with the idea that it isn't good for 
Boosevelt. By his action in the coal 
strike and his interest in anti-trust 
legislation, the President has hurt the 
feelings of the corporations. Wall 
Street has got through with him, and 
wants a safer man for his successor. 
Wall Street has nerves, and the Presi- 
dent has jarred them ; it has money 
and will spend it to beat him— for 
nomination if possible, for election if 
necessary — provided the Democrats 
put up a sane and trustworthy citizen. 
But the cat doesn't jump until next 




t45V» 



n^HB members of the Intercollegiate 
-^ Committee on Football Rules 
are reported to be pondering deeply 
the question how to meet the demand 
for reform in the vociferous exercise 
that they are apx>ointed to regulate. 
The demand was as definitely ex- 
pressed as it can be at the meeting of 
the Head-Masters Association in Bos- 
ton last December, when the masters 
of many well-known schools expressed 
emphatically their judgment that foot- 
ball as now played is too severe and 
dangerous, and asked for *'such a modi- 
fication of the present rules as will 
retain the unique and characteristic 
advantages of the present game with- 
out its most serious evils.*' This seems 
a reasonable desire, but the coipmittee- 
men are quoted as repining over the 
difficulties of their task. History has 
recorded the compromise of the care- 
ful parent with her child who aspired 
to aquatic diversion : 

*• Mother, may I go in to iwim ? " 
*' Yes, my darling daughter ; 
Hang your clothes on a hickory limb, 
And don't go near the water." 

In a like spirit the committeemen 
might advise the head-masters to let 
their lads play, but to keep them off 
the gridiron. The side lines are fairly 
safe as yet, but that wouldn't suit the 
masters. They like the game and want 
their boys to play it, but they don't 
want them to invest their whole vital 
force in it for two months of term 
time, or to be broken in too many 
places at the close of the season. 

Perhaps the committeemen may be 
able to tinker football so that it will be 
more tolerable, but they have to con- 
tend with a spirit that tends to run 
every good college sport into the 
groimd by making it too arduous and 
too seriously important. It has been 
reported that it is hard work at Har- 
vard this year to get out the requisite 
number of competent men for the 
crews, the nines and the track athletics. 
The students, we are told, prefer the 



milder sports, like basket ball, lacroese, 
hockey and fencing. They hesitate to 
undertake the severe labor and profuse 
expenditure of time that membership 
in the more important teams involves. 
If that is true, it does credit to the 
undergraduates' discretion. All the 
chief intercollegiate contests have 
grown to be too laborious. Prepara- 
tion for them is too big a job for men 
who pretend to do anything else, and 
the physical strain of some of them — 
rowing and football especially — is x)eril- 
ous to the health of many of the 
contestants. If the football rules com- 
mittee can make that game less dan- 
gerous and easier, it will be a good work, 
and if the four-mile boat races can be 
cut down to three miles, that also will 
almost certainly be an improvement. 






n^HERE seems to be a great increase 
of betting on horse-races. The 
stock-market gambling which was so 
prevalent throughout the country until 
last fall has diminished very much. 
The newspapers no longer contain the 
daily advertisements of inside informa- 
tion offered to lambs at so much a 
week, but there has been an increase 
of advertisements of racing tips. The 
get-rich-quick concerns which were 
fooling their dupes a year ago with 
illusive promises of preposterous stock- 
market profits are fooling them nowa- 
days with hopes of big winnings in 
horse-races. Of course, so long as the 
inevitable separation of the fool and 
his money is so easily induced, it is idle 
to hope to stop it entirely, but the 
horse-race sharpers seem for the mo- 
ment to be getting rather more than 
their share of the fxmds of the simple. 
We are following with surprising fidel- 
ity in the footsteps of England, where 
betting on horse-races is so extraordi- 
narily prevalent, and so mischievous in 
its results, that it has lately been the 
subject of a parliamentary investiga- 
tion. A committee has looked into it, 
and has reported that it is an enor- 
mous evil, but no plan has been de- 
vised as yet which will check the 
ruinous indiscretions of the betting 
poor, without at least reflecting un- 
handsomely on the betting rich. 



LIFE 



2J7 




QfSoCtt**MiJr 



8t, Peter: what way did tou comi, xa'axT tou look worn out. 
President qf Society for MhiccU Culture: bt th« hew elevated system. 

St. Patrick: SURE, YB'D have got here just as quicksand been XOBE OOMVORTABLB like, ox THB old ROHAN BOAD. 



218 



LIFE 




"piNG-PONG 18 dead, but the historical romance is still with us. 
-^ Calvert of Strathore, Carter Goodloe's tale of Paris during 
the French Revolution, with headquarters at the American Em- 
bassy, is chiefly remarkable for the multitude of celebrities one 
meets iu its pages. It will doubtless be read by hundreds who have 
never opened A Tale of Tioo Cities^ "and the loss will be theirs. 
(Charles Scribner's Sons. $1.50.) 

The Speronura is the first volume of Miss Katherine Prescott 
Wormley's forthcoming Jottmeyi with Dumas ^ selected translations 
from the Impressions de Voyage of the great Frenchman. It is a 
Tolume of delightful reading, showing us Sicily in 1836 through 
the eyes of an unsurpassed observer and raconteur. (Little, Brown 
and Company, Boston.) 

The publishers seem to consider anything which bears Gilbert 
Parkers signature to be worthy of covers. The author's name is 
the only assignable reason ior making a volume out of The March 
of the White Ouard^ an incident from the annals of the Hudson 
Bay Company of mere short story value and showing careless 
workmanship. (R. F. Fenno and Company. $1.25.) 

A book well fitted to fill an aftemoon^s leisure will be found in 
The Romany Stone, by J. II. Yoxall, an English Member of Parlia- 
ment and dabbler in literature. It is a story of Derbyshire gypsies, 
with just enough adventure to be interesting and just enough local 
color to be realistic. (Longmans, Green and Company. $1.50.) 

Charles F. Carter, in Some Byways of Califorhia, falls, as the 
saying goes, between two stools. His byways lie mosily among the 
less visited missions of the South, but his facts are too scattered for 
a guide book, and his style is too labored for entertainment^ (The 
Grafton Press.) 

A volume which should be a source of delight to any enterprising 
boy, and will arouse whatever lingering memories of bird nesting, 
butterfly collecting, rabbit rearing and kindred sports may cling to 
older minds, is M. A. Hewett's Open Air Boy, Mr. Hewett's flora 
and fauna are English, but his spirit is just human kid and knows 
no geographical restrictions. (R. F. Fenuo and Company. $1.25.) 

There are times when a bite between meals — a cooky for the inner 
man or a bright short story for the imagination — is as good as the 
proverbial feast. The Herr Doctor, by Robert Macdonald, is a 
morsel for such occasions. (Funk and Wagnalls Company. 40c.) 

J, B. Kerfoot, 

Socialism. 
^HERE are two kinds of socialism, namely, the 
theoretical and the practical. Theoretical eocialism 
contemplates the rich dividing np with the poor. 
Practical socialism, on the other hand, contem- 
plates the poor dividing np with the rich. The 
f mits of theoretical socialism are panics, hot air and 
high thinking. Practical socialism is prodnctive of tmsts, 
strikes and nnezampled prosperity. There is some talk of 
Christian socialism, owing to a great many practical social- 
ists owning pews and giving np lovely. However, the 
best thought seems to be that Christianity has to do with 
the gospel, rather than with affairs. 






** OH, JACK : TUS BMOIMSBB DIDM^T BKAB YOU TOOT T' 



St. Patrick. 

^H£ poets say St. Patrick was a gentle- 
man ; historians say he was a French- 
man ; the chroniclers make him an adopted 
Irishman ; the fact that he drove vermin out 
of Ireland refutes the slander that he was a 
Scotchman ; and his miraculous talent in con- 
verting the Irish nation to his religious views, 
without a debate or a broken head, marks him as a statesman 
worthy of honor, a saint worthy of canonization. 

The Ireland of Patrick's day was a country to make an Anglo- 
Saxon groan, to make a Scotchman weep. Poets, scholars, 
musicians and orators were the most highly honored in the land ; 
kings were numerous enough to congest travel ; heroes were a drug 
in the market ; bankers and burglars were unknown ; millionaires 
and door-locks were non-existent ; Englishmen were yet unborn ; 
trade was in the bands of low foreigners ; and the strenuous life 
was still in' the web of the future. Ireland was darkly ignorant 
of finance, promotion, poverty, dirt, industrialism, Carnegie, kero- 
sene, coal trusts, imperialism and the other joys of true civilization; 
it was happy and unharassed, although given over to poets and 
pipers, harpers and humorists, and, though divorce and the 400 
were unknown, it never blushed. 

Although a missionary, St. Patrick was a gentleman ; he adopted 
the garb, language, brogue and customs of the Irish ; he never 
called in the Roman fleets and legions to swat his converts ; he 
made no demands for franchises and concessions for his Gallic 
countrymen ; he even forgot to plunder and insult his hosts. To- 
day we naturally would regard him as a failure, fit only to excite 



LIFE 



21» 



the Bcom and merit the cenaure of pious 
presbyteries; an unpractical visiontry, preach- 
in>( faith, charity, peace and love, unac- 
quainted iKTith alcoholism or an elastic cur- 
rency or conscience. 

St. Patrick taught the Irish the principles 
of government, and laid deep and broad the 
future greatness of the race. He predicted — 
he was something of a prophet— that the Irish 
would rule all the nations of the earth— except 
the Irish. To punfsh their sins and stimulate 
their activity the Irish would be bossed by the 
Sassenach. This, said the wise Saint, will prove the 
unfitness of the Sassenach for government, and temper 
the pride of the ruling and unruly race. 

St. Brendan, the Navigator, was a favorite disciple of 
St. Patrick ; he could tack and reef, and give Kipling 
points on weather and verse. He sailed for Spain 
and fetched up in New York, antedating the 
Santa Maria and Mayflower. After charting 
Manhattan he sieered for Australia, and landed 
in Galway and was welcomed home by St. Pat- 
rick. Said he to the Apostle, *' America is a great 
country and a fine climate. All it needs is a 
hard-working, thrifty population and a firm, 
paternal Irish government to make it the wonder 
of the world." 

"Brendan," said Patrick softly, ''what d'ye 
think Vm teaching the principles of government 
for? What's the sense of being a prophet if you can't 
squint ahead a trifle of fifteen hundred years? America 
will fill up with all kinds of people from white men to 
Anglo-Saxons ; they'll be too busy to govern themselves, and 
our boys will take care of them. In those days 
nothing will be too good for the Irish — except the re- 
formers ; and they'll be too good for everybody, and 
useful only to make people happy and contented 
under Patrick's chosen people. It will be a great 
day for Ireland." 

In good season St. Patrick died in the odor of 
sanctity and the North of Ireland ; he went to glory, 
and heaven is his bed. 

It was O'Hara, the wise philosopher of Shanbally- 
macguthrie, who wrote ''Blessed is the man who 
dies poor and single. He leaves no widow to scoff at 
his frailties with number two ; no son to spatter his good name 
with red liquor ; no estate for a family to fight over, and cause 
graceless lawyers to mock his sanctity and impugn bis sanity." 

Patrick died celibate and celebrated, honored and lamented ; 
he was the only man who ever conquered the Irish, the only 
conqueror loved and honored by the conquered — once a year. 
Perhaps in time the Irish will live up to him. 

Joseph Smith, 




TBN LIITLB XILU0NAISS8 8TAKDIN0 IN ▲ LINK ; 

ONI 8W0BB HIS TAXIS OFF. TBIM THUII VBBI HOT NUd. 




VINI LIITLB XILU0NAIBI8 BBWAIUMO ALL TBEIB FATI ; 

ONI SAID HI LIVID IN GAICDIN. THIN THIU WIEI HOT BOBT 




BIGHT LITTLI lOLUONAIlllS II8KIN0 OHANOI OF HIATBM *, 
ONI HAD NO lOXOBT. THIN THIBI Will BUT 8IVBN. 



Remembrance. 



day — 



"J" OVE was with me yester- All the world may marvel why 
Joyful with great joy am I. 
None may know who cannot say, 
* * Love was with me yesterday ! " 
Charles Hanson Totome. 



In the dusk she crept away ; 
But I am light-hearted yet, 
* Since I never can forget. 



'T^HERE are people who recite to you all the tragedies 
-^ of the erening papers, and call it conversation. 




SBVBN LITTLB MILLIONAIBBS IN A PRBTTT FIX ; 

OOLDBONDS TOWID HI WAS IN DIET. THIN THIBI WBBI BUT BIX. 



220 



LIFE 




BIX LRTLB MILIJONAIBai GLAD TO BB ALIYS : 

THIS ONI DID LIKI ALL THB MM8T. THXN THKBB VIEB EOT riTB. 



i 




riYB LIITLB XILU0MAIBB8 TBCTBFUL TO THB OOBBCT) : 

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" VU A BANKBrPT/' OHB DBOLABBD. THBN THBBB WBBB BUT THB 




TBBBB UTTLB HILLIONAIBBS GLAD THAT THBT WBBB THBOUGH ; 
ONB OAYB A FOOB BXCU8B. THBN THBBB WBBB BUT TWO. 




A Toast to the Irish Blood. 

T^ILL me a cup with the " Dew of Killarney," 
-■- Purer than chastity, essence of fire ; 
Ogling a laugh at ye, beaded with blarney ; 

Breath of the peat-smoke, and blood of desire I 
Fill me a cup, 'til I drink to St. Patrick ; 

Drink to the harp strains, the songs that beguile ; 
Drink to our emblem, the mystical shamrock I 

Up with ye ! Down it I The Emerald Isle 1 



Oh, we are the world's great lovers ; 

To our hearts Love fled from the skies ; 
For we know the secret of laughter, 

And Ire know the passion of sighs. 
And your vanity's fief to our blarney, 

And your soul to our Irish eyes. 

We follow the star of the vision, 

Whose light to our souls doth stream ; 
For us swing the ivory portals, 

Where the pearls of fancy gleam, 
*Mid the coarse, philistine banter : — 

** 'Tis the mad Celt's madder dream I " 

In the van of the world's great battles, 

We have followed the scarlet ways. 
Then, to war with our pen's stiletto I — 

For the losing side, always !— 
And, behold the Pharisee, blatant. 

Impaled on our poignant phrase. 

From cerements of convention, 

The heart and the brain we free,— 
Rebels, and mockers, and dreamers. 

Of the open road and the sea. 
Our pelf is but love and laughter, 

Ix>otless and friendless, we ! 

Though broken our falling rafters. 

Though our larder shelf be bare, 
Better the wit and the masic. 

And the hearts that know not care. 
And the hand that is free and ready 

A crust with all to share ! 

Then, fill me a cup, 'til I drink to St. Patrick ; 

Drink to the harp strains, the songs that beguile ; 
Drink to our emblem, the mystical shamrock I 

Up with ye I Down it ! The Emerald Isle I 

Mrs. Wilnon Woodrmo. 




TWO LITTLB MILLIONAIBBB, FOB TBUTH THBT "TOOK THB BUN I *' 
GOLDBUG HAD A MOBTQAGB. THBN THBBB WA8 BUT ONB. 




ONB LFITLB MILUONAIBB LBFT AMONG 80 MANY ; 

SAID HB HADN'T BBBAD TO BAT. THBN THBBB WA8N*T ANT. 



LIFE 



221 




* I Don't BCUBTB I CARK FOB FRUIT, ANTWAT.'^ 



~rN a recent issue of Life there appeared 
-^ in '* The Worst Newspaper" contest a 
statement which the editor of the Richmond 
(Ind.) Palladium resents. lie says : 

To show yon bow grossly and cmelly yon have 
wronged ns by printing tbe statement of some 
cowardly enemy, we will state tbat tbe Palladium 
is the second oldest paper in tbe State. It Is the 
leading Republican paper-dally and weekly— 
in a section of the State oTCrwhelmingly Repub- 



lican—leading in eTery respect. What its finan- 
cial standing is, you can easily find out by con- 
salting any commercial agency. 



TpmST ACTRESS : I was certainly 
-*" beside myself with rage. 

Second Actress: You certainly 
were. Why, you quivered even in the 
places you were upholstered. 



Vacation Notes. 

T3UDYARD KIPLING and Alfred 
-^ ** Austin will start soon for South 
Africa on a still Pegasus hunt. 

President Baer and John Mitchell of 

the Amalgamated Union have together 

taken a cottage at Newport for the 

season, where they will entertain their 

friends. 

Joseph Chamberlain and the 
Kight Reverend Emperor William 
are planning a yachting course to 
South America in the latter's boat. 
Provisions will be taken on for a 
six months* tour, and three sur- 
geons will accompany the two 
friends. 

Peter Collier and E. W. Bok are 

talking of changing places. Mr. 

Bok will run Collier's Weekly, and 

Mr. Collier will preach for TKe 

Ladies* Eome Journal, 

Juhti D. Rockefeller is contemplating a visit 

n L«o Tolstoi of Russia. His object being to 

Bi^nvert Count Tolstoi to the Baptist Church. 

Confessions of Geraldine. 

C> W much longer can I endure it ? 

This momiDg my husband rose 
before daybreak. He was too lazy to 
light a lamp, and breakfasted in the 
dark. The result was he ate the 
prepared kindling wood instead of 
the predigested breakfast food. 

When the servants got up there 
woa nothing to build the fire with. 
(if course they were angry and left. 
I do not blame them. 

I spoke of the matter to my hus- 
band to-night. He said he did not 
care, that he had felt first- 
rate all day. 
The selfish brute I 
I am quite calm as I write. I marvel 
at my own patience. 

'^PHE ideas we pride ourselves on 
^ most are foundlings, not our own. 



Ek'"^^ 




Mrs. Bass : help I housebbbakbbs, thikvis 




PonriflU, t$0$. If Z4/» AiMMMnf (O. 



SIX 

JUBT BEFORE 



'E 




M. 

IE AWOKE. 



224 



LIFE 




DRAMA 




\^v^)c^ 



K^ *<'!,' 







The Negro on Broadway. 

n^HE SeDegambian idea of 
-*- humor is primitive at 
best, but in its elementary 
state it makes an irresistible 
appeal to the other human 
creature with a fairer skin. 
Complicate it with the ques- 
tionable refinements of what 
is called musical comedy and 
we ^t a product which is neither funny 
nor agreeable. All that is essentially ne- 
gro ba» disappeared, and in its place is a 
poor iriiftntion of a model which is not 
wortli imitating. The plantation darkey, 
apiug the airs and graces of his masters 
and mi.Htrtisses, is amusing, but even then 
not nt his best. It is when he is natural 
and KiMrmtaneous that he is really a co- 
median. 
** In Dahomey," which marks the first appearance at a Broadway 
theatre of a company composed entirely of negroes, is an illustration 
of the fact that when the negro gets out of his own racial environ- 
ment he doesn't become a white man, but spoils the negro. 
Williams and Walker themselves, who head the organization, have 
always managed to create much merriment in bringing out this 
very point in a vaudeville sketch. One is the typical, thick-headed 
darkey roustabout, grotesque in person and child-like in his credu- 
lity. The other is the equally typical smart "coon," with yellow 
skin, an irresistible tendency to gorgeous attire, and a thorough 
acquaintance with sporting life. They both have the negro facility 
in dancing and singing. As vaudeville artists their act was 
laughable throughout. Spread out over an evening's performance 
they reach the limit of their resources early and one quickly re- 
alizes how little there is to their abilities. The piece in which they 
appear is a crude effort with no plot and no lines. One song, 
"I'm a Jonah Man," is made funny in the interpretation by 
Bert Williams, but in itself is on the same level as the rest of 
the performance. 

"In Dahomey" makes no effort to call out what really charac- 
teristic talents might possibly exist in the large number of negroes 
crowded on the stage. There is none of the good dancing one might 
expect, and none of the delightful harmonization to which negro 
voices lend themselves so readily. These colored people give sim- 
ply a pitiful exhibition of their childish race vanity, which finds 
its exploitation in dressing up in gaudy attire and making up their 
tawny skins with paint and powder in imitation of their white ri- 
vals in similar entertainments. 

As a theatrical attraction, " In Dahomey " does not seem to jus- 
tify the experiment of turning a Broadway stage over to a negro 
company. As a demonstration of the histrionic capabilities of the 
colored race, it is an absolute failure. 




ANY people of their own color flocked to 
see these African performers, and at first 
it seemed likely New York might have to 
tBLce the race question right here within its 
own limits. New York is very sympathetic 
with the negro in the South, but when it 
comes to sitting next to him in its own 
theatres, a slight repugnance demonstratet 
itself. He may be a man and a brother all right, but when it comes 
to touching elbows with him for an entire evening, your New 
Yorker objects quite as strenuously as the Southerner. The man- 
agement of the New York Theatre met the predicament by assign- 
ing seats for negroes in separate parts of the house. 
# # # 

ND so metropolitan New York is going to allow, 
■ileepy Philadelphia to have the endowed 
theatre this country so sadly needs. Over 
there it is a matter of five million dollars ; 
here it would mean six millions. But 
Philadelphia is the seat of much wealth 
and the necessary money may be forth- 
coming before New York knows that it 
has neglected the opportunity to establish 
the one institution which should fix, for all time, its position as 
the artistic as well as the commercial metropolis of America. It 
already has the Metropolitan Museum of Art and the Metropolitan 
Opera House ; to complete its pre-eminence, it should round out 
the artistic trinity with the Metropolitan Endowed Theatre. 

Metcalfe. 
LIFE'S CONFIDENTIAL GUIDE TO THE THEATRES. 

Aeademv qf ^f»*ic.—''F\oroAon.^* Musical comedy of a bygone epoch. 
Only lalrly well presented. 

Seiaseo,—'* The Darling of tbe Qods.'* Sombre but impressive Japanese 
drama. 

Bijou.— UMie CahlU In "Nancy Brown.** Llgbt-weight musical comedy. 

Broadway.— iMt week of ''Tbe Silver Slipper." It will not be deeply 
regretted. 

Ca^no.—" The Cblnese Honeymoon.** Musical comedy. Reasonably 
amusing and tuneful. 

Criterion.— Ja.meB T. Powers in '*The Jewel of Asia.** Musical comedy. 
Pretty poor. 

Daly^i.— ''The Billionaire.*' Musical comedy. Not very funny and 
ratber coarse. 

Garden.— Ur. Soihem in **If I Were King.*' Well acted poetic play 
iMksed on the life of Francois Villon. 

Oarrick.—*' Mice and Men.*' Agreeable comedy, with Annie Russell as 
the star. 

Herald Square.—'' Mr. Pickwick.** Musical comedy, with Incidents from 
Dickens's story. Amusing. 

Kni€kerbocker.—"MT. Bluebeard.*' Elaborate production of tiresome 
musical comedy. 

Jifanhatfan.—'* The Bishop's Move,** with W. H. Thompson as The 
Bishop. Notice later. 

Princess.— AmelUk Bini^ham In "The Frisky Mrs. Johnson.*' Diverting 
play of society life by Clyde Fitch. 

Savoy.— Mr, Fitch's *' The Girl with the Green Eyes.'* Society comedy. 
Amusing. 

Ft(;/<7f*ia.— Blanche Walsh in " Jiesurrection." Depressing but interesting 
stage version of Tolsioi's story. 

WaUack^s.-Qeorge Ade*s "The Saltan of Sulu.** Musical comedy. 
Well performed and laughable. 

Weber and Fields'g.—Bnrlewine and vaudeville. The management re- 
Rards the ticket-speculator as a down-trodden individual who has a perfect 
right to live. 



LIFE 



225 




IN FORTY-SECOND STREET. 

"l WONDSB IP I*LL CATCH MT TRAIN.** 

The Worst Newspaper. 

(The contest closed on March Ist. Announcement of j>rize- 
winner will be made as soon as possible after the publication of 
contributions.) 

Number Nine. 

'^r'HE Pittsburg Dispatch is positively the worst newsjiaper in the 
-^ United States. 

The one reliable item in it is the date. It is printed in two 
sections, for the purpose of denying in the second the assertions 
made in the first. 

It is made up of itissaids, rumorhasits, accordingtos and similar 
reliable items, garnished with pink ink. If, by chance, it reports 
a cold fact, one realizes, on reading it, that it is an old friend one 
has met, sometime ago, in a better place. 

Its editorials are reminiscent of the animal that is neither dog 
nor goat, because, for a dog it has not bark enough, and for a goat 
it is lacking in horns, while the size of its ears bears witness to its 
negative intelligence. 

A philanthropist has offered $76,000.00 to the person who could 
analyze and clearly state the JhspcUch's political position, but 
nobody ever even made an attempt to earn the money. 

The Pittsburg Dispatch can safely be read by anyone desiring no 
news, or by those who read ''anyhow," or by those whose moral 
standing is so low that they do not care how they spend two cents 
United States money. 

It is a newspaper only because it has to be classified somehow, 
and it could not be called either a bill-poster, or a patent medicine 
circular, as it lacks toughness as well as sanitary qualities. 

It is useless. WUkinsburg, 

Crisis. 
TXT ASHINGTON : Cipher dispatches from Caracas con- 
^ firm the nunor that a strange man with a camera 
is taking things in Venezuela. 
The rei)ort that he is a Grerman with an English mother 




is belieyed to be exaggerated. The President does not deny, 
however, that the navy yards have been ordered to hasten 
all repairs. 

Washington : The Grerman Ambassador acknowledges 
that the man with a camera, at Caracas, is a subject of His 
Imperial Majesty Wilhelm II. Bat he insists that only a 
cow and a few natives have been taken, thns far, and that 
there is no disposition to take territory. 

The crisis is believed to be passed. 

The Irish Lover. 

nPHE Englishman's love is a model of form, 
•^ Respectable, dominant, never too warm. 
His cardiac temperature may be found, 
Where it should be, at seventy all the year round. 
There is no lack of fire in the hot Gallic heart. 
But it errs when it makes of love-making an art, 
Instead of an instinct, like fighting or fun — 
Each an excellent thing, if it's not overdone. 
The Irishman isn't like Briton or Gaul ; 
He says, *' Love is your affair ; manage it all." 
He woos in a natural, rollicking way 
And sighs just as seldom as one in love may. 
He is willing, but not at all anxious, to die 
For her sake, if she asks him, but wants to know why. 
His compliments please, for, between you and me, 
He sees only just what he wishes to see. 
In dealing with women he finds truth is best, 
And blarney is only the truth neatly dressed. 
Should she pout or refuse him, he will not complain ; 
Homoeopathy lends him a balm for his pain. 
But when he wins some one, he gives her the key 
Of his heart and his purse, well contented to be 
In a limited monarchy head of the state, 
With a clever prime minister keeping him straight; 
And she who becomes this plain gentleman's wife 
Has a lord and a lover the whole of her life. 

James Jeffrey Roche, 



226 



LIFE 




'I*TI ONLY TWO XINUTU TO BPABB. BLAST IT ALL.' 



St. Patrick and the Serpent. 
"/^OME, move on wid yez," sez 

^ Saint Pathrick sharply. 

"For why?*' axed the sarpint, 
ooilin' himself up more comfortably. 
" It's well satisfied I am wid the way 
things is here." 

"I'm not donbtin' that same," sez 
Saint Pathrick. "But it's ont av it 
yez must go, becase I'm telliu' ye to." 

*' An' who might yez be? " axed the 
sarpint, wid a sneer like a woman has 
at her best friend's last year's dress. 
"An'who might yez be?" axed he, 
for sure it was himself was the biggest 
owld sarpint in all Erin, an' diyil a bit 
did he care for nobody at all, at all. 

"I might be the Prisidint av the 
United States," sez Saint Pathrick, 
sarcastic like, " or I might be a anti- 
thmst law," sez he ; " but I'm not. I'm 
Saint Pathrick himself, an' I'll thron- 
ble you to be gettin' a move on yez. 
Come, move on now," sez Saint 
Pathrick, givin' him a whack wid his 
pasthorial staff. 

** Ouch I Murder I " sez the sarpint, 
shiverln' all over wid the pain an' sur- 
prise av it. " Say, me darlin' Saint," 
he sez humbly, "can't we arbithrate 
this proposition av yours? " 

"'There's nothin' to arbithrate,' 
quotin' yerself," sez Saint Pathrick, 
wid a grin. ^ 



TBB BLASTl 



"Sure, haven't I vested inthereete ? " 
axed the sarpint hotly, for his timper 
was niver none av the h^HsL 

" If yez have,'* eez Saint Pathrick, 
" sthick 'em in your vest an* f^t ont 
av this. There's more just lilte yez I 
must be chasin' to-day, an' I can't 
stand palaverin' wid yez 
forever," sez Saint Pathrick. 

" Think what 




I've done for 
the oounthry," 
begs the sar- 
pint. " Think 
how it's meself 
has developed 
its rasources. 
Sure, it would 
not amount to 
a dhrop more'n 
England itself 
if it wasn't for 
me energy an' 
entherprise," 
tears in his eyes. 

" Thrue for yez, me bucko," sez 
Saint Pathrick, "till ye 're so f ull av 
those same rasources yez can hardly 
crawl. But crawl yez must immejate." 

"Ye'U niver be able to get along 
widout me," sez the sarpint, shaking 
his ugly owld head wamin'ly. " Mere 
men can niver do what meself has 



i**<4 



ON TXMB, ArrSB ALL/' 



sez the sarpint, wid 



done. It takes a combination av 
sthrengch an' skill an' courage an' 
confldince to push great entherprises 
to success," sez the sarpint. 

" That same success bein' the ruina- 
tion av everybody else," sez the Saint, 
proddin' him wid his staff. ''Git out 
wid yez." 

" Ye'll niver be able to go on wid the 
good work yez are doin* av convertin' 



LIFE 



227 



^U^- 




the )iatheia an' spreadin* the thme religion widout money," 
seethe garpint ciiniiiTrij — s^ure, wasn't he the slick owld 
rooHther? '* It's mesclf/* he goes on wid all the earnestness 
in the world, *• it's meself will hnild chnrches an' colleges, 
an' hospitola an' libraries till everybody sez there's nobody 
like Saint Pathrick for cotivertin' a connthry, an' besides," 
sez the sarpiut, " ye shall have a campaign fnnd whatTl make 
ye the only saint in the calemlar. Thmst me," he sez. 

But Saint Pathrick was too wise for him enturely, 
aii* scorned his bribes, he did so, an' dhrove him oflf 
the island like the rest. But just before he plunged 
into the say^ the sarpint turned an' sez, sez he : 

" It's a gplendid Baint yez are, Saint Pathrick ; 
hut it's a dam* poor practical politician ye'd make. 
It's the ruiDation av any parthy ye'd be, as sure 
as I*v© no Ho^vl," he sez. 

An' wid that he plunked sizzlin' into the say, 
an* swam sthraight for America, where he's 
rilativee, so I'm towld. Alex. RicketU. 

Apostolic. 

A N authority assures 
-^^ us that the Protes- 
tant churches of the 
United States raised 
eighteen million, three 
hundred and sixty-nine 
thousand, one hundred 
and sixty-three dollars 
for foreign missions last 
year. 

The original apostles 
got the gift of many 
tongues by an inspiration 
of the Holy Ghost. 

These matters are or- 
dered rather differently 
now, and yet not in- 
effectively withal. 

Certain it is that money 

talks to '*men out of 

every nation under the sun." 

QIRL'S best chaperon 
is her conmion sense. 



**TH« BLOPEB8 HATB RETURNKD TO ASK TOUR BLE89IN0." 

"BLB981NO, BH? HOW DO THBY WANT IT / IK THB FORX OF AK ALLOWANCB, OR 
A CASa DBPOSITt '* 




THE WIDOW. 

B DANCB OP LIFE. 



LIFE 





LAY OF ANCIENT ROME, 
Oh, the Roman was a rogue. 

He erat, was, you bettum; 
He ran his automobllis 

And smoked his clgarettum; 
He were a diamond studibus 

And elegant cravattum, 
A maxima cum laude shirt, 

And such a stylish hattum. 

He loved the luscious hic-hsBC-hock, 

And bet on games and equl ; 
At times he won ; at others, though. 

He got It in the nequi; 
He winked (quo usque tandem?) 

At luiellas on the Forum, 
And sometimes even made 

Those goo-goo oculorum. 

He frequently was seen 

At combats gladiatorial. 
And ate enough to feed 

Ten boarders at Memorial; 
He often went on sprees. 

And said, on starting homus, 
"Hie labor— opus est, 

Oh, here's my hie — hie — domus I** 

Although he lived in Rome — 

Of all the arts the middle— 
He was (excuse the phrase) 

A horrid Individ'l. 
Ah, what a different thing 

Was the homo (dative, hominy) 
Of far-away B. C. 

From us of Anno Domini ! 

— Shanghai Times. 



'T^^ll^MIVLLv^ 



In his reminiscences, Charles Brookfleld, the re- 
tired English actor, says: "My father was dining 
in London one night at the Oxford and Cambridge 
Club with Tennyson and two or three others. After 
dinner the poet insisted on putting his feet on the 
table, tilting back his chair 'more Americano.' 
There were strangers in the room, and he was ex- 
postulated with for his uncouthness, but in vain. 
'Do put down your feet!' pleaded his host. 'Why 
should ir' retorted Tennyson; 'I'm very comfortable 
as I am.' 'Everyone's staring at you,* said an- 
other. 'Let 'em stare.' replied the poet, placidly. 
•Alfred,' said my father, 'people will think you're 
Longfellow.' Down went the feet." — Argonaut. 



I WAS at Caribou last Saturday. The day was 
fine. I took the sidewalk near the Burleigh Hotel, 
and passed down Sweden street. On this particular 
sidewalk was a huge drift of snow as high as the 
vine-covered fence. Pedestrians had made a nar- 
row path through it two feet deep. When I had 
got about half way down this "straight and nar- 
row path," I met a lady, young and handsome. As 
I did not want to get into the snow up to my watch 
pocket, I turned around to go back. 

"Wait a minute," said she, "I will show you 
how to pass ; put your arms around my waist." 

After hesitating a moment, I did so; she then 
put her arms around me and said: "Turn as you 
would In a waltz." 

I obeyed, and all too soon we had conveniently 
passed each other. 

"Everything Is easy in this world if you only 
know how," said the charmer, as she tripped along 
again." — Aroostook Republican. 



Tms is the way a Billville Justice laid down 
the law: "Mr. Bailiff, take the lawyer to jail for 
ten days, give the woman a divorce, whip the bus- 
band and bring in a Jug of liquor !" — Atlanta Con- 
stitution. 

"Abb you sure the course is clear,'* she whis- 
pered, sliding down to the arms of her lover. 

"Yes," he responded: "I succeeded in boring a 
hole in the water pipe. Tour father has discovered 
it, and will keep his finger over the hole until the 
plumber arrives. Come V'^PhUadelphia Bulletin. 

"Tou say Grace married into the smart aet?" 
"Gracious, no; she was divorced into It." — 
B<iltimore Herald. 

Stories concerning the rivalry between Chicago 
and St. Louis evidently will never grow old. The 
latest concerns a visit which Alderman Michael 
Kenna, "HInky Dink." recently paid to St. Lioals. 
He wished to talk to a friend who lives in the sub- 
urbs of the Missouri city, and, as he had a dime in 
his pocket for change, called up over the telephone. 
He talked but a few minutes, and then asked the 
central operator how much he must deposit for the 
call. 

"Fifty cents, please," was the answer, in a most 
confident voice. 

"Fifty cental" gasped the alderman. "What do 
you take me for? A man with coin to bum? Why, 
in Chicago I can call up hades for 50 cents." 

"Perhaps so," was the answer, still framed in 
the most unruffled tone ; "but that's within the city 
limits, you know." — Man in the Street (New York 
Times). 



hirm is for sale by all Newsdealers in Great Britain. The international News 
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substitnte. 




^y^^'^^mmmm^^ 






LIMPS OF PEPPii SJEy,jStSLit?SSStoS! ^ri r e 

sehaiidalMoliitel7indiffesS»l«.McIIJHENNY'S ^OiHidCO &€UiCC 

csrdasa^euonner.ita'readydiaMlyedandisapotittTesidtodlirfstton. TryitODoe. At 
aUffTooen. Free Booklet on request. MclLHENNY'S TABASCO, Kewlberia, La. 



I 



IOLETTESddCZAR 



THE EVER FASHIONABLE PERFUME OF 
GRIZA-LLEGRANDCarandPrixPaxislOOO) 



LIFE 




E^gyptian 
Deities 





miO©^ 



PIANOS 

Our Quarter-Grand is the 
smallest Grand embodying 
modern principles ever made 

An illustrated catalogue will 
be sent gratis an application 

MANUPACTURXD SOLBLV BY 

CHICKERING & SONS 

Pianoforte Makers 

796 Tremont St., Boston, Mass. 

Established in 2823 



SyflUIAMS'S 

( SHAVING ) 
STICK 



Indispensable to every j 
I gentleman who shaves. 

Combines in the 
highest possible degree, 

Luxury, 

ElogancCj 
Convenience, 

^The J. B. WillUmsCo., ai«»tonbiiry, Ci^ 



CO me,Wf TO CARRMGE HEADQUARTERS 

Write to-day for our illustrated catalogue (free) which describes our goods truthfully, 
explains our method and our guarantee and makes it safe, simple and easy for you to 
get carriages, harness and horse accessories direct from our factory at wholesale prices. 

THE COLUMBUS CARRIAGE md HARNESS COMPANY. 
Factory and Qeneral Offlce, Columbus, 0. Western Office & DittrilMiting House, St Louis, SNo. 

Write to nearest office. 




Si£«i, fi, fi, e^, end 7 feeL Wdght, 30 U 70 Iba, 

TJin fi Uie only Practical rnirtnhk Tnblc In iiJif^ Tiart fiti 
lirnTity or dinliii; luibjt, or on out fLjJcLirii? flUtii'i i Quickly 
h vtl with our lt!Tp]n]g hliH^kif *tt awjij la cJijwi nr ti4fhii]d 
A-.iKif, ]ivit«a 1 1 J im I'TvV I'd . Kirb niAhg'fitnjr TraiuC wji]^ {ilaiict 
ELriiAtiL Ueciorputerjt iJirinaiiUiJ w^:id, wkh atetl firUfru^ tlie 
(■Illy bed Lhii Will reTimiJi pcrfin:tLy level under ml rcondiMoi:!*: 
t^nen bni<drt(it1l cover, b«'*t tuhtt^r ad J «tn>L raBhltiiib, 
r.MiiL?«^4r(i i^k'^ll^tM, vilh rri\'fn., I(i fliifpt baU*, 4 eutnn ii> 
LHi;>k[iji'iiLi UJlAOa. Write £ut bwiltlei, liwi iiUo tor 
J 1 limp 11 ( yQur \<yt:ji,i timkrt 

Th« I. T> eURROWES CO., PartUnd, Ma., and Ifew lotk 

Alio itfr». Uurrgwta RariLSviM lllM^L■t Scix-i-riB, MtLtU tu Order. 



The only PURE and CORRECT ARTIFICIAL 
MINERAL WATERS sold in America to-day. 

CARBONIC, ARTIFICIAL VICHY, 
5ELTERS, CLUB SODA, Etc., 

aro also put up In bottles for out of town 
delivery, and oan be sent by freight or 
express to any part of the united States. 

"^""^ CARL H. SGHULTZ 

TeL 8490 Madison Sq. 480-444 First Aye., N. Y. 



PlRE DeUOHT found in Thr EDtSON 

PHONOGRAPH 



Use Ediion 
Moulded Records, 
Mdkf Records of 






/.■ 



-TdlU-afii; 



The PHONOGRAPH led 

all tnlkin;;:; machines in- 
to prominence. 
The PHONOdRAPW leads 

all in volumcSiwef tne55 

and clearness of the 

suund prijduiied* 
The PH0IN00R4PH i* the 

machine with vhich 

successful records can 

be made at lujnnc. 
The PH0?«00ftAPH catalogues and Record 

Lists are /rt^ at nH iMihrf^ 

Nalianal Phono^aph Co., Oranj^^« N. J, 

IISW 1 031, 33 Chambar^ t\.\ :HT:AaO, H\ Watuli M- ; 
XU10?E> 3J Ee opart rahl OforgEi. ArtwATB, BolfluB 



20th CENTURY LIMITED 



20-Hour Train 
to Chicago. 



NEW YORK CENTRAL, and LAKE SBC 



LIFE 



(gNTEMPoRA 




A South Carouka Finoivo: "What was the 
verdict that the coroner's Jury returned?" "Wilful 
neglect of duty on the part of the deceased. Ho 
went out unarmed, knowing the other fellow was In 
town." — Chicago Record-Herald, 

Fob conyenlence. really superior hotel service 
for select patronage, and climate, there is nothing 
for New Yorkers quite like Lakewood, New Jersey. 
Laurel House. 
Laurel-in-the-Pines. 

Somebody has figured out that kings earn about 
$80 a minute. We have seen four kings earn more 
money than that in less time. — Atlanta Journal. 

Go to Old Point Comfort, Va. Take a rest and 
you'll be glad. Trip teems with interest. A postal 
to the Chamberlin brings a booklet. 

"What yo* doin' now, Abe?" 
"Cleanin* out a bank." 

"President, cashier, bookkeeper, or Janitor?" — 
Leslie's Weekly. 

ELECTRIC-LIGHTED TRAIN TO CALIFORNIA. 
The *' Overland Limited" via Chloa«o and North- 
western, Union Pacific, and Southern Pacific Rail- 
ways, has electric reading lamps in every berth; 
long distance telephone service, buCTet-Ubrary cars 
(with barber and bath), compartment ob3ervation 
cars, and dining cars. All agents sell tickets via 
this route. 

"How do you like this young pianist?" 
"I think she is a good Christian." 
"Yes; her right hand does not know what her 
left hand does!" — Le Figaro, Paris. 

HOTEL VENDOME, BOSTON. 
All the attractions of hotel life, with the com- 
forts and privacy of home. 

"I HAVE something exceedingly rare in the way 
of books." 

"Thanks. When it comes to a book. I prefer one 
that is well done." — Harper's Bazar. 

Don't be deluded into trying European makes, when 
the best is American. Cook's Imperial Extra Ihy, 

SHE : Doctor, is Squeedunk a good place to go 
for rheumatism? 

Doctor: Sure. That's where I got mine. — 
Detroit Free Press. 

PAI.M Beach, Fla., Is easily the queen of the 
winter resort world. The grounds, favored by Na- 
ture with a great variety of tropical growth, bor- 
dered on the west by Lake Worth and on the east 
by the Atlantic Ocean, have been greatly enhanced 
in beauty by the lavish expenditure of money. The 
shores of the lake for miles are fringed with stately 
cocoanut palms, always in bearing. In the Royal 
Poinclana grounds these cocoanut groves extend to 
the spacious verandas of the hotel. The lawns, of 
which there are acres upon acres, are green the 
entire year through. Branching out In every direc- 
tion are the most picturesque bicycle paths imag- 
inable. They run for miles north and south into 
deep Jungle, through groves of stately palms and 
tropical trees, by handsome villas and artistic 
grounds, always within hearing distance of the 
waves of the ocean swashing In upon the beach. 

"So you belong to an anti-swearing league. 
Have you accompliihed much good?" 

indeed. W^by, we have persuaded some of 
Water Srrett teamsters to say *0b, fudge I ' 
teams tangle up." — Chicago News. 



0W 



^?f:;>^^y 



70£ff^ 



Mn 



,$' 



What 

PURITY " ^i-^'t 
Means 

Purity req\iires pure welter. 

We get it from six wells, driven down to rock. No purer 
water flows anywhere in the world. 

Purity necessitates pure air. 

All the air that touches Schlitz Beer, after the boiling pro- 
cess, passes first through an air filter. 

Pure beer must be filtered. 

Every drop of Schlitz beer is filtered by machinery 
through masses of white wood pulp. 

Pure beer contains no ||emis« 

Schlitz Beer is sterilized after it is bottled and sealed, 
by a process invented by M. Pasteur, of France. It 
requires one and one-half hours. 

That's how we double the necessary cost 
of our brewing. We do it to make purity 
certain — to make Schlitz Beer healthful. 

Will you drink common beer, and pay just 
as much for it, when Schlitz Beer can 
be had for the asking. 

Ask for the Brewexy Bottling. 



fff^ i 



ABBOTI5omGiNAi 

Angostura Bitters. 



One taste convmces 

KORNiOaSP 

That it is the best 



•LIFE 



CHARTREUSE 



— QREEN AND YELLOW— 



THE OLDEST 
KNOWN AND 
FINEST OP ALL 
CORDIALS 



FOR 300 YEARS 
IT HAS BEEN 
MANUFACTURED 
BY THE CAR- 
THUSIAN MONKS 
OF FRANCE IN 
THE SAME WAY 



A GLASS AFTER 
DINNER I S A 
WONDERFUL 
AID TO 

DI QB8TIO N 



At flrtt-clMs Wine Merchants, Oroecn, HbUU, Cftfte. 

BiUjer & Co., 45 Broadway. New York, N. Y. 

Sole Agents for United States. 




(-^^GOUT & RHEUMATISM 



UttibtGraat En^MBh Remedy 

BLAtR'S PlLLSl 

5«re, Svr*, CffecUvft. S OCX Hi $ K 






THE CITY OF NEW YORK, 
DEPARTMENT OF TAXES AND ASSESSMENTS, 
MAIN OFFICE, BOROUGH OP MANHATTAN, 
NO. 280 BROADWAY. STEWART BUILDING. 
January 12. 1003. 
NOTICE IS HEREBY GIVEN. AS REQUIRED 
by the Greater New York Charter, that the books 
called "The Annual Record, of the Assessed Valuation 
of Real and Personal Estate of the Boroughs of Man- 
hattan. The Bronx, Brooklyn. Queens and Richmond, 
comprisiniK The City of New York," will be open for 
examination and correction on the second Monday of 
January, and will remain open ontU the 
1ST DAY OF APRIL, 1003. 
DuriniT the time that the books are open to public 
inspection, application may be made by any person 
or corporation claiming to be aggrieved by the as- 
sessed valuation of real or personal estate to have the 
earoe corrected. 

In the Borough of Manhattan, at the main office of 
the I>epartment of Taxes and Assessments. No. 280 
Broadway. 

In the Borough of The Bronx, at the office of the 
Department, Municipal Building, One Hundred and 
Seventy-seventh Street and Third Avenue. 

In the Borough of Brooklyn, at the office of the De- 
liar ment, Municipal Building. 

In the Borough of Queens, at the office of the De- 
partment. Hackett Building, Jackson Avenue and 
Fifth Street. Long Island City. 

In the Borough of Richmond, at the office of the 
Department, Masonic Bulldfnar, Stapleton. 

Corporations in all the Boroughs must make appli- 
cation only at the main office In the Borough of Man 
hattan. 

Applications In relation to the assessed valuation of 
personal estate must be made by the person assessed 
at the office of the Department In the Borough where 
such person resides, and in the case of a non-resident 
carrying on business in The City of New York, at 
the office of the Department of the Borough where such 
place of business is located between the hours of 10 
A. M. and 2 P. M., except on Saturday, when all ap- 
plications must be made between 10 A. M. and 12 
noon- JAMES L. WELLS. President, 

WILLIAM S. COGSWELL. 
GEORGE J. GILLESPIE. 
SAMUEL 6TRASBOURGER, 
RUFUS L. SCOTT, 
Commissioners of Taxes and Assessments. 



Pabst beer 

is always pure 

Brewed from carefully selected barley and hops — never permitted to 
leave the brewery until properly aged. 



THE 



EQUITABLE 



MENRV B.HYDE 
FOUNDER 




J.W.ALEXANDER 

PRESIDENT 



,,, HYDE 

PRESIDENT. 



y/- 



AM INCOME 
WITHOUT CAPITAL 

can be created hy means oi the New 
Continuous Instalment Endowment Bond of the 
Equitable. 

If you die. it will provide a permanent income 
for your beneficiary just when he, or she. may need it. 

If you live, it wilt provide an income for your- 
self Just when you may need it. 

The income commences at once , it you die. 

It will commence in twent y years jf you live 
and wilt be paid as long as either you or tlie 
beneficiary live 

It will be paid fontweniy years in any event. 

Send coupon below for particulars. 



.■.I I 

^\ 

Wac^nmt^M Ut PYerv Ntnte Tor itica of ch^rnrter find pniTtfr i» ajcl as vBJl 

rriin'Nfiitiktivi*:*!. AM»Ly lu ttaiEt' E. TurbeLl^ 'id Vlrc-Ptrit. W^-^J 

The Equitable Life assuraxce Socrnxv or the Uwited States, ■Ell 

iM BkOADWAv, New Vork. Dept. No. 27, WwM 

i wotihl )iki' tfi riLtti^iVfi inrormEtiian r^urdbi^ a o.mijnuous InsiMlment Endow- [(w^fl 

ment Jkirtdt iiitiod ro a^ YAar^un .igfld »».*., -yean. l^S^nl 

Name,.,,,..... , * *.. .,.,►. 

Addms, . . i.,, , -,-.^t H...... *..*f 



LIFE- 




DOMINION LINE toEUROPZ 




=-^l^^^rBoston to Quvanstown and Liverpool 

8-N, Coiiiiii<»nwe4tlibHt 13,00(1 tona 

K.K Canada, « lO,001>tofis 

8. S. MerloOf « 11,03^ loiLN 
MEDITERRANEAN SERVICE 

SU^ani'-T-' tlin^t to Azore^t Gibraltar, 

ttudrl&, Stnr! for Illii^irjittid JiookR'i. 
DOMINION LINE 




Evans 

Ale 

Hai no counterpart at home or abroad. lU 
purity. fUTor aod bealthfuloeflu are pecul- 
iar to itfcelf. No article could bay^ obtained 
»uch widespread popularity aare through 
•uperlatire merit. 

« «,^r2r«* for j»«l 117 yean by 

C. H. KTAN8 &JaON&t, Undeon, If. T. 



High Class Cloths 

for 

Tailor Made Gowns. 

Scotch Homespuns, Cheviots and 

English Mohairs, 
In all the fiuhionable weaves tmd colonic;!. 



NEW YORK. 




!W^ 



LIFE 



HARTFORD ="^SfelT 
DUNLOP °**¥Sk|I 
HARTFORJ) RJSJKgg 

5 



f^/^' 




Unlimited Comfort 

Half a million dollars is the expense of new 
equipment this season on the California 
Limited. You pay nothing extra for 
these added comforts. 

Most experienced travelers prefer the California Limited. They 
find luxurious ease in the cozy compartment and observation Pull- 
mans. They enjoy the diversified scenery, a thrilling panorama of 
valley and peak, forest and plain ; no wearisome monotony. They 
appreciate the superior dining-car meals, ** Santa Fe all the way," 
Chicago and Kansas City to Los Angeles, San Diego and San Francisco. 

Such a train will please you, too. Why be satisfied with less than 
the very best ? You can visit Grand Canyon of Arizoiia en route. 

Our other through California trains carry standard Pullmans, 
tourist sleepers and chair cars. 

Atchison, Topeka & C^ — . --i^ -i. -^ ¥7^ ^ Gwieral Paaaeogcr 
Santa Fe R'y. Oailta JC 6 cK. 



WE CUIM 
THAT 



OLD CROW RYE 



IS BEST— 
BECAUSE 






H. B. KIRK 
& CO.. N. Y. 



It is sold straight. It brings the distiller far more price 

than any other made in the United States. 
It is hand made, sour mash, and has the best reputation. 
Our Scotch Whiskies are true Glenlivets ; are sold straight. 
The Souvenir is old. 
The Bonnie Brier Bush is very old. 
Compare them with any others. 



.^ 



/t^fc ' x> 



§ * 1 



A trnde mark Ts valuable only b^^cause 
of what it represents. iWjpk ask for 

Kelly-SpriT\gfJeld Tires 

because the eiperipnce of the grealeHt 
number of users and bmldem of vehicles 
ba.s ahown that the KeUy-Springfifld Tire 
is the best. Send for our booklet, " RuLlmr Tirtd*' 

Cor\solld«Lted Rubbmr Tlr» Con\peLi\y 

40 Wall Street, New York Akron, Ohk> 



Que taste convinces 

KORNiffiISP 

BreakEBsUDinneKSiiiipe^ 



NATURAL SHERRY^ WINE 

Now for tiie First Time 

Oirtainable |n t!^ 

Cotfiitry. 

OHE product of the finest vineyard 
of Spain« A natnrat tmcolored 
and unsweetened wine^ containing only 
the actual akohol made by its own f er- 
mentation« A delicious table wine of 
about the same akohofic strength as 
clarets and may be drunk quite as freely. 
It is the adopted luncheon wine of the 
Wine Merchants^ Luncheon Qub of Lon- 
don (the members of which are the best 
judges of wine in the world)* 

Price per csLse of 12 bottles, $t2*00 
Sample bottles, fl*25; express pjtid 

G. F. HEUBLEIN & BP 

Hartford New York L**- 



LIFE 



10^ 
Am th* mothef ttKlt t!w crarfl* toine tr^.nfiarBiiitc La Kkr^it of 

IfKf tKT £ hiltJ+ Ai thfi 4:hild f rowm the vi^ m^rttwr l^^d't t)lv 

body vllh ALI^NUUH ISHIHG Voop k A i>r4et t ti.tt ht may 1:>* 
itro^K (or iifc'i bAltJ«i iJid And ui honored pl^ce nld^ mca. 

Shredded Whole Wheat Biscuit 




ll Hl9 K»tllT»l Foort — ihc TM,ii »hn*e e:!-"!! intPiTnl pr^r* hi' 

CtsKt toufitc r|vi rt io t hfl |iij ni 1 a (:Mxly — lUt firiffl 1 1 ■ [ 
lldslbe perfect wlhslc b«^airv« H buiki* the wrfrni par^- 

The perfect food to wrftct mail. 6 H REDDED 
WaolE WHEAT BISCUIT IS more porous tliafl 
any other lood — that roeaua more digestible. 

U Uilu'ckJy tr^Eiiif.>rraed int9 tL' h blMJ, l^tto flmJi, t^iJy 

mulcln *ild fttl iK^Uvfr tit4i[i» Said hy fell grt>i,eri^ 

Send fof »'TJ» vital Qu«tkm" tCook B«j3t, llliortrated in 

color^j FREE. AddttEi 

THE ITATt^KAL POOD COMPAlfT 
HiA^ii Falls. If. T, 



Richard Bennett 

TAILOR 

Riding, Driving. Qolf Suits. Unlforns and Lbtrles 
Importer of Fine Woolens 

Fine Shirts a Specialty 
206 and 208 Broadway, New York 

EVENING POST BUiLDINQ 




$750. The 

CRESTMOBILE 

is the best of all 

Gasoline motive power. Starts from the 
seat. Speed up to 30 miles an hour. Shaft 
drive. Simple to operate and is noiseless. 
No chains. 

100 miles on a single charge. 
SEND FOR CATALOGVEX 

CREST MFG. COMPANY. 

Home Office, CAMBRIDGi:* MASS. 
16 West ISth SU New Yoris. 

Agencies in other large cities. 




THB ARTXSr WAS VIBT GLAD Dig PICTUBB UXU 
WHIN SB SAW WBO WAS ON THB JUBT. 



/y 




n 



VELVET 



Most Yolreta are stretohed. ** Nonparoll " Vel- 
vet Is never stretched. Its pile is therefore 
faster than that of other yelvets, and its 
wear gparanteed. The dvers* name, J. A 
J. M. WoBSALL, on hack of everf yard. 
Marie Rose wrtteat " The ' Nonpareil * 

Velvet is anequalcd, rad far superior to 

other fabrics of the kind.'* 

**NoB|»areU>» Velvet awanled Flnt Odd Medids 
«t Fkrli^ London and Amsterdam Ezhlbltlona. 
ALL cocone at nasr-oiAss stores. 



I I I I I I i 



Good Leads 



Smooth as Silk 
Strong and Sound 

DIXONS 

AMtRlCAN uRAPHlTt 

PENCILS 



[ 



UTTcsUJr«lL 




M I M I I I I'l 



Joicph Oixon Crucible Co., Jersey City. N. J. 





One pack 

Bicycle 

Playing Cards 
beats two pair 
of poor packs. 

Bicycle cards wear well. Popular 
price 29 backs. Back shown 
is "Racer" design. Order by 
name. Sold by dealers. 

The U. S. Playing Card Co. 

Cincinnati, U. S. A. 

We will send IZS-pa^e Condensed Hoyle 
for 10c. stamps. If addressed to Dept 51. 



LIFE 




Aaio mob ilej: 



have been in successful service shice 1895. The latest models 
are a lesuU of eight years steady aiid consistent attention to 
development and tmprovernent in Ihe largest and best equipped 
automobile factory in the world, and are unequaled for effi- 
ciency, durability, perfecMon of details and efeg-arice of finish. 

COLUMBIA GASOLENE TOURING CAR 



Mark XLL 




Everywhere admit !ed to be the most uerfect gasoler.e car yet devised. 
Seats siK persons. New and exclusive features throughout. All parts of 
engine and transmission gear instantly accessibte. Igniting plugs and 
valves removable without tools. Speeds four to forty-five miles psr hour, 
Minimum of vibration and ncise. Finest body work &nd furnishings ever 
seen on an automobile. 



Trice, 



^5,000 



COLUMBIA LIGHT ELECTRIC RUNABOUT 



M&Tk XXXVIIL 




One of the sensations of the New York and Chicago Shows. Most con- 
venient, fastest and handsomest Electric Runabout in the 1903 market. 
Battery and motor benealh the floor, leaving entire body space available 
for tuggage. Low center of gravity gives great steadiness and splendid 
riding quahties. Two brakes. Five speeds up to fifteen mil?> p?r hour 
Forty mllea on one charge of battery. 



Trtce^ 



^900 



ELECTRIC BROUGHAMS, HANSOM5, COUPES^ 
CABRIOLETS, TONNEAUS,SURREVS,VlCTORl AS, 
RUNABOUTS, SPECIAL SERVICE WAGONS, 
BUSSES, WAGONETTES, DELIVERY WAGONS, 
TRUCKS, PATROL WAGONS, AMBULANCES 5 ^ 

Tat^tdgue And tyll Information will be sent on reqiie^l 

Electric Vehicle Company 

HARXrORD, CONN. 

NEW VORK SALESROOMS, Wcit 39th St., opp. Metropolitun Opera Houie 
BOSTON, 4 J Cnlunbiis Ave. CHICAGO. 1431 JVHchlgan Ave. 




f 

" ¥E>T ASD HOW MAf^V MJ^rFH WIM. I Al'PRAK IN IP Trtill I^VKA^flTT, 




You'll be cnmfortjljle aboard 

The Golden State LImfited 

Don^t make any mistake about thai. It's that kind of a 
train. 

There's a diner, of courseja buffet-smoker, an observation 
car, a compartment sleeper, and a bath room with hut 
and cold water, soap, and RKAr. bath towels. 

_^^^ Less ihan three days Chicago to Los Angeles, 

Through cars 10 San la liarhara and San Frati, 
ciHco. Electric lights ; clectnc fans ; barhcr 
shop ■ Booklovers' Library. Lowest aldtudes. 
Runs over the EJ Paso- Rock Island muic— ihe 
most southerly line across the coniinent. Cut 
oat ihis ad. and mail it, wiih name and addre*is, 
toibisMfiice, and a beautifully illusirated book 
about CaHfi.}rnja will be sent free. 

Jno. Sebastian^ P.T.M.» Chicajifo» III, j 




•LIFE 



M&rch 12. ieo9L 



DARRACQ 

p A DC HOLD MORE RECORDS THAN ANY 
^^iV»3 OTHER MAKE IN THE WORLD .* ji 




i lii3itw>pnv,r?' IfKU laAHRACVi, ia liK top anil triniicfiu (t<iii4-hJtlt|f>. 

NiiWlesiB- antoraahc Itibrlciitlori- complete rtirmtle cunrn^l. ^, i\ lo. r: und -Jti linrac- 

Wci»lEiy lmiM»rTiiUon» liiitui'f.' l&t#at siv1«9 luid Jmmeill&te delivery^ 

S^et' our ttuattii^^M (Ieil?«r¥ waj^iirirt, rininwrn frriv 

AMERICAN DARRACQ AUTOMOBILE CO. 

Controlled fey F. A. LA ROCHE COMPANY 

Etetern Airetit^ for xhv Cl*?vcl*tiri Uo?MlHter &52-6&4 Hudson Street 

llrnnch^HT Weal 3?itti Street WEW YORK 





I^O oily but in? I pad hei^h eggs. Th<* eirifs 
1^ pivc a tlclicious cr^aniiriess and that 
brii?bt, fresh nvidc flavor thai was Ihougbt 
impoa*»hie in a maiiufacturod ariklc. Ab- 
solutely pure. Xevtr spoils. 

ALPHA SALAD CR£AM 

is ii new preparation as dainty as the house* 
wife*s best mayonnaise, or the chefs mosl 
famous Salad lhes**iTig. Contains no oil, but 
those who like oil can readily add their favor- 
ite brand with perfect resuhs. 

ALPHA SALAD CREAM 

is the ideal Dressini^ ior^i II varieties of salads. 
It is also the ideal sauce or relish for cold 
meals, canrcd salmon, shrimp or lobster, fi«.li 
cakes, bal.ed beans, cold slaw, cold cauH- 
flower or asparagus, cold hafh or on sand- 
wiches* Samples not mailable* 

ALL GROCERS 

MiinlKH Taft Wi ntworili rti\\,tr h.»v»t {'~i r«dpe« and 
^uggffsituMi.) sirni frd« lor gnuer'* n:ini^» l*hi» f'^iyrOt ln- 
cUiJe> pnrmiuHT bit. Infutms \im Jiow tu a«Gqf<* l^e tiew 

WONDERLAND PtJDDIK0 TABLETS 

One Tablet makes a i.|u;*ri oJ mi Ik iiitrh a tti*lk jelly mone 
(fiflicKtis. relresliiue *rid lu'umtimg thai* oOtir 4l«.*»eirt$. 
Wiinilertaiid Podding Tablsls aU*j make dplkvms Ice 
t rftiim. Fark;n;« i>i i-k Tijl^lcts by tnaii )» ients« Ko 
3umpli*s, 

THE H. J. BLODGETT CO. OttC), 
47 Thayer Street - BOSTON, nA55. 



VOLUME XLl. 



NEW YORK, MARCH 19, 1903. 

Entered at the New Tork'Po«rj>fl|p0JM^(y[2P°^'^'''^ ^^'^^ Matter. 
Copyright, l^'t^'LiPB PubushiKo ^dUtpAjv^. 






NUMBER 1064. 




** TOUS iriTK HA9 OPBNBO AK ACCOUNT WITH US, SIR, AND I CALLKD TO BBS TOU ABOUT IT/ 
" J>OX*T JDU IT, you:Na MAN t I'TB HAD BUSINESS DEALINOS WITH HER NOW FOB TBN TBAB8« 
AND BHB HAS ALWAYS OOT THE BEST Or MB/* 



LIFE 



UMDCR THE ACT OF 1S91. 



VIRGINIA HOT SPRINGS 

2,500 Feet Elevetioii MagaHiceat ^9mmUnn Serroandiiigs Open All the Year 

"''^'^*'" Chesapeake & Ohio Railway 




INCOMPARABLE SPRING, SUMMER AND FALL CLIMATE 

Luxurious baths and most curative waters known for rheumatism, pout, obesity 
and nervous troubles. New g:olf club house with squash court, loun^ng rooms, 
caf^, pinp pong, etc. Fine g:olf links, tennis courts, pleasure pool, excellent 
livery and all outdoor pastimes. 

Now Hoinostead ar\d Cottaga9.-The hotel is a brick structure of the 
highest class, completed in September, 1902, containing 400 rooms and 200 
private baths. Long distance 'phone in each room. Broker's office with direct 
New York wire. 

Pullman compartment car from New York via Washington and the Chesapeake 
and Ohio Railway. 



The F. F. 



arrives Hot Springs 7:25 A. M 
Broadway, New York, 



V. Limited, leaving New York 4:55 P. M. 
Excursion tickets at C. £^ O. offices, 362 
and otlices Pennsylvania R. R. and connecting lines 
For hotel information, address 



throughout the country 

FRED. STERRY, Manager, Hot Springs, Bath Co., Va. 



JEROMB ■as. CRIMB 

2tr HARRIE DAVIS 

The thrilling story of how District Attorney William Travers Jerome has 
undertaken, single-handed, the desperate task of ridding New York City of its 
vice and crime, will create a far-reaching sensation. 

This story will tell truthfully and fearlessly of the actual, existing con- 
ditions. It will make astounding revelations regarding the politicians and 
police officials of supposedly high standing, who are in league with the 
keepers of dens of shame, disreputable gambling resorts and the like, and will 
show how these guardians of the peace and public safety have accepted 
bribes In return for which protection against prosecution Is guaranteed to the 
law breakers, dealers In crime. 

The frank and open manner in which details of vice will be treated may 
call forth very harsh criticism from many readers, but the truth must be told 
and plainly. Some hard scenes will be enacted and much pathos shown, and 
there will be everywhere apparent this young man's noble determination to 
"clean the city." 

Nothing will bo concealed. The inside facts and secrets come direct 
from judge Jerome himself. 



It Is a romance of the sea. 
a most delightful strain of 



SIR HENRY MORGANa Buccaneer 

By CYRUS TOWNSEND BRADY 

This Is the author's latest and greatest work, 
fierce and powerful ; yet carrying throughout, 
wholesome love. 

BOTH OF THCSC ARTICIXS COMMENCE IN APRIL 

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ELECTRIC BROUGHAMS, HANSOM5, COUPES, 
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E^lectric Vehicle Company 

HARTFORD, CONN. 

NEW YORK 8 VLBSROOMS, Wot 39th St., opp. Metropolitan Opera House 
BOSTON. 43 Columbus Ave. CHICAOO, 1411 Michigan Ave. 



LIFE 



239 





//:■,- - 



TOTAL 8TRAN0S1I8. 

A Feather Fancy. 

"DENEATH dusk coils of ostrich plume 
-^-^ Her hair has all the glint and gloom 
Of some dim Oriental room 

Half firelight lighted; 
Her brows display a Cupid-curve ; 
Her nose is flawless without swerve ; 
Her chin shows winsomeness and verve 

And mirth united. 

Her wide and wondrous eyes, — ah, me, 
What wells they are of witchery I 
[ can but marvel what they see, 

With gaze unbroken ; 
Is it some lover, heart-preferred, 
F* *r whom her lips seem faintly stirred, — 
A-tremble with Love's perfect word, 

A " yes," low spoken ? 



Dear dream of maiden loveliness. 
Could I but think that poisM " yes" 
Were meant to ease my heart-distress. 

All grief were ended ! 
For what consistent bachelor 
A greater joy could hunger for 
Than just to pose as conqueror, 

And your intended ! 

Clinton ScoUard. 

"TJ" USB AND : Where do you want 
-^^ to go on a vacation ? 

Wife : Oh, anywhere that's expen- 
sive and restless. 



Saved. 

ff 'Y^OXJ are in my power.*' 

"^ Bertram Callow, polished vil- 
lain that he was, as he spoke flourished 
in his hand a paper. 

"Your lover," he sneered, "can do 
nothing. He is but a humble dry 
goods clerk on thirteen dollars a week, 
while I hold in my hand the mortgage 
on your father's coal-bin. You must 
marry me before midnight or I will 
foreclose." 

Sibyl clutched her hands nervonsly 
in her peroxide hair. She had only a 
moment to spare, as the Split Sisters 
were waiting to come and do their 
famous act. Assuming an air of care- 
less abandon, she said gaily : " Why, 
certainly, dear. It will be all right." 

Approaching the sideboard, by a dex- 
trous movement of her hand she threw 
several grains of predigested break- 
fast food into a glass and filled it with 
Scotch. 

•* Drink my health," she said, with a 
bright smile. 

In sixty seconds more, as the villain 
writhed on the floor, her lover stole in. 

** Quick, Jack, the paper!" she 
cried. 

Thus virtue triumphed. 



240 



LIFE 





sphere. 



tercsting to watch our Uncle's coat 
come off and his back bend to the 
effort to put it through 



♦♦ H'Ai/e there is Life there's Hope:' 

VOL. XLl. MARCH 19, 1908. No. lOM. 

19 WB8T THlRTT-PlRSr ST., NlW YORK. 

Published every Tnureday. •5.0O a year in 
rauoe. Postmce to forelsn countries in tne Poscai 
Union, ll.iH a year extra. Single current copies, 
10 cents. Back numbers, after three months from 
date of publication. 2& cents. 

No contribution will be returned unless 
accompanied by stamped and addressed 
envelope. 

The illustrations in I.IFE are copyrighted, 
and are not to be reproduced. 

Prompt notification should be sent by sub- 
scribers of any change of address. ^ 

y H E Fifty - Seventh 
Congress did some 
thingg well. In its last 
se^ion it passed a good 
army bill, and put the 
Philippine currency in 
order. It provided 
^ .- for the new ships 
^- _ which we are 

told are india- 
pensable to 
our comfort 
as defenders 
of the Ameri- 
can hemi- 
Its saddest omission was 
its failure to modify the Philippine 
tariff. There is great distress in the 
Philippines, and a modification of our 
tariff which would promote trade be- 
tween ns and those islands was part of 
Governor Taft*s plan of relief. But 
it failed. Leg^islative assemblies are 
like corx)orations in that it is hard to 
locate their souls. But there were 
good omissions as well as bad. Quay's 
Statehood bill failed, and we escaped 
having two more unfit States added to 
the Union. Senator Morgan succeeded 
in holding over the Panama Canal 
treaty for the consideration of the new 
Senate, but at this writing the proba- 
bilities are that the treaty will be 
ratified, and possibly the meritorious 
reciprocity treaty with Cuba will also 
pull through. We have got along for 
a century without a Panama Canal, 
and can doubtless rub along without it 
for some time longer, but the canal 
seems due, and here's hoping that 
Uncle Sam will get Senator Morgan's 
consent to build it. It is a huge un- 
dertaking, and it will be vastly in- 




M^ 



R. ADDICKS is not to go at 
present either to the Senate or 
to jail. By an agreement between the 
Republicans and the Addicks bondmen 
in Delaware, two new Senators have 
been chosen— Dr. Ball to represent 
Delaware, and Mr. Allee to represent 
Addicks. Mr. Allee has long been Mr. 
Addicks's leading hired man in Dela- 
ware, and the manager of his pro- 
tracted attempt on the Senatorship. 
It is disgraceful that a Senatorship 
should be the reward of such work as 
he has done, but after all, it is not his 
Senatorship, but Addicks's, and he 
holds it as Addicks's proxy. Public 
sentiment about the compromise for 
which Allee and Dr. Ball stand is 
mixed. Addicks is not yet in the 
Senate, and that is important, but it is 
feared that, the fight against him has 
been weakened by the compromise, 
and that when Dr. Ball's term ex- 
pires it may be impossible to prevent 
the gasman from succeeding him. The 
pity is that it i^uld be merely a 
question of how long it is possible 
to keep Addicks out of the Senate, and 
not, as it should be, a question of how 
long it will be possible for Addicks to 
keep out of jail. No State has ever 
before been debauched as he has de- 
bauched Delaware, but for all that 
appears Addicks may defy decency 
and incite dishonesty for years to 
come and go still at large. 




M' 



fR. JOHN D. ROCKEFELLER 
has gone to California to meet 
the spring. His health is no longer as 
robust as it was, and he pays more 
attention to recreation than he did in 
early life. He was almost incessantly 
busy then ; that has long been known, 
but a great deal of interesting light is 
being thrown on the aim and scope of 
his early activities by Miss TarbelVs 
history of the Standard Oil Com- 
pany which is running as a serial 



story in McClure's Magastine. It is a 
mighty interesting story, and Mr. 
Rockefeller is the hero of it. Possibly 
Mr. Homung, the biographer of Hag- 
gles, might have done Mr. Rockefeller 
fuller justice than Miss Tarbell has, 
but she has done exceedingly well, and 
a great company of readers are obliged 
to her. For really Mr. Rockefeller is 
worth knowing about. He is an ex- 
traordinary character : a truly Napole- 
onic trader. If it were polite to call a 
benevolent elderly gentleman of Bap- 
tist proclivities a monster, the tempta- 
tion would be strong to apply that 
word to him. It would not be an 
epithet, but merely a definition. A 
monster is something that seems 
human and isn't. Mr. Rockefeller 
seems human. Hia likeness is the 
likeness of a man ; his x>ortrait by 
Mr. Eastman Johnson shows him good- 
looking and not without distinction. 
But as one reads of his career, of his 
extraordinary acquisitiveness, and the 
craft, remorselessness and indomi- 
table persistence of it, the impression 
strengthens in the mind that there is 
something nnhuman about him. In- 
human one would not call him, for he 
has no malice and has never been 
needlessly cruel. Superhuman one 
would hesitate to call him, for 'that 
implies qualities which he has not 
manifested. Unhuman he somehow 
does appear; mighty, extraordinary, 
defective ; a man whose life seems 
one long disease — a monstrous, insatia- 
ble hunger for money. It is sad to be 
the slave of an appetite, even though it 
leaves one's head clear and his brains 
active, but the slave of his money-hun- 
ger Mr. Rockefeller seems to have been. 
Oh, well 1 Our judgments of men 
are only guesses, after all, and our 
estimates of living men are especially 
liable to err. Possibly it is wiser 
merely to wonder at Mr. Rockefeller, 
and leave it to the future historian to 
weigh and analyze his character. The 
trouble is that he has worked so much 
by pipe-lines and other underground 
methods, and has been so retiring and 
advertised so little, that the future 
historian may not recognize him as a 
profitable subject for investigation. 
But the material Miss Tarbell has 
gathered helps, at least, to avert the 
chance of his being neglected. 



LIFE 



24t 




'"7- K- H'* '^' ""^ ^'^' 



'mother will be down in a minute. ' 

'*wht| the maid said tour mother wa9m*t at home.** 

"then W0N*T TOU please go? it will save MB A GOOD LICXINO.** 




LIFE 



UFE'S FASHION PLATES. 

OOLT 008TUMB— ■ZCLUSITE PATTBBM. 




TT'ATHERINE CECIL THURSTON'S 
-*-^ DOTel, Tke Circle, is couceived on 
lines at once artistically simple and strongly 
dramatic. There are but four characters 
fully deyeloped, but they are drawn with 
breadth and sureness, enlist sympathy from 
the first and hold interest to the end. (Dodd, 
Head and Company. $1.50.) 

The critical biography of Nathaniel Haw- 
thorne , by Professor George E. Wood berry, 
is disappointing. It is careful and pains- 
taking as to the biography and plodding ns 
to the analysis. It utterly lacks the subtle 
necromancy with which, for instance, Sir 
Leslie Stephen has materialized for us the 
spirit of George Eliot. (Houghton, Mifflin 
and Company. $1.10.) 

This is not a sentimental age, and one 
meets few stories based on sentiment which 
do not ring false — be the rift in ourselves or 
in the writer. That Dear Old Sword, a 
pretty child's story by Nettie Gray Dainger- 
field, is one of the exceptions. (Presby- 
terian Committee of Publication, Rich- 
mond, Va.) 

27^ American lieptiblic and Its Oovern- 



ment, by James Albert Woodbum, is a 
work of decided importance and one 
which has been much needed. Of per- 
functory constitutional histories there 
are enough and to spare. And there is 
always Bryce. But the middle ground 
is unoccupied, and Mr. Woodbum fills 
it with a work of admirable quality. (Q. 
P. Putnam's Sons.) 

* Historical romance for young begin- 
ners is supplied by Beulah Marie DLr ir 
A Little Captive Lad, a story of Crom- 
well's time in England and Holland. 
The story is very childish and the lan- 
guage very grown up, but the young are 
precocious these days and may like it. 
(The Macmillan Company. $1.50.) 

Henry A. Shute's Beal Diary of a 
Real Boy is a tag end of the Magic 
Carpet. Open its pages and, presto! 
the years fall away and we are ten 
again. Don't let us ask how much of it 
Mr. Shute* wrote in the '60*s and how 
much last year. Enough that it has the 
Magic Carpet's powers. (The Everett 
Press, Boston.) 

An edition of James Jefirey Roche's 
amusing skit, Her Majesty the King, a 
Romance of the Harem, with illustra- 
tions by Oliver Herford, should find many 
new readers. The little volume has the 
grave style of an Oriental manuscript, the plot 
of a comie opera, and a full share of wit withal. 
(A. H. Russell. $1.50.) 



Hints to Golfers, by "Niblick," attempU to 
give the Why of Golf methods as well as the 
How. It is semi-scientific in its treatment, 
and its theories and advice are elucidated by 
excellent diagrams. (Niblick, P. 0. Box 1579, 
Boston.) 

Charles H. E. Brookfield's Random Remi- 
niscences is a large, light, handsome book of 
light stories. The author is a son of the Mrs. 
Brookfield who was so great a friend of Thack- 
eray. He was an actor. He says in the preface, 
" I am hot aware that I have included in this 
volume anything of importance." He has not, 
but he has made an unimportant, entertaining 
book that it is easier to read than to stop 
reading. Some of his stories are not quite 
advantageous to himself, but none of them is 
tedious. (Edward Arnold, London. Long- 
mans, Green and Company, New York.) 

J, B. Ktrfoot. 



** 'y»00 bad about the Goldslathers. 
"*- They haven't a home. ' ' 
** Where do they live? " 
** In a million-dollar marble palace." 




The First Janitor : hbt thbbb, tou I 

NO CHILDREN ALLOWED IN THIS TBXB I 



LIFE 



243 



ALICE IN MARCH. 




S the 17th of March fell on a Tuesday, 
Alice decided to go- for a walk. The 

blustering March wind (why are March 

winds always said to bluster?) was so 

chill, that Alice wrapped her long fur 

boa more closely about her neck as she 
ran down the front steps. 

The boa was not a new one this 
year, so it was not a flat stole, but a 
long, snaky affair, with all the 
serpentine sinuousness of a liye 
boa-constrictor. And in the afore- 
said blustering wind the ends of 
the boa writhed and curved 
through the air like real snakes 
round a snake-charmer. 

Indeed, so very blustering was 
the aforesaid wind that Alice 
scurried along with her head held 
down — in the mistaken notion which 
women have that this posture will 
keep them warmer— and so she 
wandered away from the road she 
meant to take, and soon found 
herself in an unfamiliar part of 
the city. 

She paused to inquire of a 
young girl who was passing, 
where she might be, and how she 
might return to her intended 
])ath. 

But the stranger paid no heed 
to Alice's questions, for she was 
gazing with glittering eyes at the 
boa, which still twisted and 
writhed in the blustering wind. 
She seemed fascinated with it, and stroked its undulating 
curves as it wreathed toward her, and fairly clutched at 
it as it blew away from her grasp. 

" Who are you ? " said Alice, " and why do you act like 
that ? Do you want my boa ? " 

«* J« it a boa? ** asked the girl. "A boa-constrictor? A 
snake? " 

»* Who are you? " asked Alice again, almost frightened 
now by the snaky glitter in the girl's eye, and the soft 
sibilant hiss of her voice. 

**I am Elsie Venner," she replied, cordially enough, 
"and I am going to a meeting of the Snake Club. Per- 
haps, as you seem fond of boas, you would like to go 
with me.** 

** Indeed I should,*' cried Alice, who was always ready 
for an adventure of any kind, and who, moreover, was 
much interested in meeting Elsie Venner. 

** It isn't far," said Elsie, as they walked along together 
in the blustering wind, **but I'd be glad if you*d let me 
wind one or two ends of your boa round my neck." 

Alice agreed, and after a walk of a few blocks they 
reached a small building that looked like the home of a 




It isn't far:^ said ElHe. 



secret society, such as they have in ool- 

And so it proved, for on entering, 

Alice discovered there were no windows, 

and no mode of egress save the one 

door at which they had come in. 

A number of people were moving 
about, and in the centre of the 
room was a large copy in marble 
of the Laocoon. 

** Great, isn't it? " said Elsie to 
Alice, writhing about as she spoke; 
** but come with me, I want to in- 
troduce you to our President." 

The President of the Snake Club 
proved to be none other than Eve. 
Although the oldest member of 
the Club, she was the most beauti- 
ful woman Alice had ever seen, and 
seemed the incarnation of youth 
and grace. 

"How do you do, my dear?" 
said Eve, who was eating an apple 
while she talked. "What a beauti- 
ful boa ! I never saw one like that 
before. Indeed, it is most unusual 
for a serpent to have such long 
hair. Look, Cleo, isn't it wonder- 
ful?" 

Alice was then presented to the 
Secretary of the Club, Miss Cleo- 
patra Ptolemy, and though not so 
rarely beautiful as Eve, Cleopatra 
had a wonderful charm, which en- 
thralled Alice at once. The Egyptian, 
too, had the advantage of Eve, in being 
magnificently attired, and wore jewels 
enough for an opera night. 

'* By the shade of Marc Antony ! " she exclaimed, " what a 

boa I Here, child, take my tiara, and give me your tippet. " 

"Don't you do it," whispered Elsie Venner; "she'd put 

Eve out and be President if you did, and we'd Jiave an 

awful row." 

"Are there only women in the Club?" asked Alice, 
beginning to understand. 

"Yes, except that St. G^rge and Perseus are on the 
advisory board. But they only know about Dragons, 
which are not really Serpents. There is only one man we 
fear." 

"Who is he?" asked Alice, but Elsie shuddered so at 
the thought of him, that she couldn't pronounce his name. 
Medusa came up next to ask for an introduction, but 
though she was pleasant, the fact that she had thousands 
of writhing snakes instead of hair made Alice feel queer. 
To be sure the snakes were done up in a classic knot, 
and waved back from her brow in an immense pom- 
padour, but still they looked untidy. 

"How do you like my coiffure?" said Medusa, tossing her 
head. "I've just blondined my hair, and I think it's 



244 



LIFE 



awfolly becoming, though Bometimee T wish I had had copperheads/* 
Snre enough the soakes were a pale yellow, which coatrasted well with the 
black aipvtte which madded coqnetti«hly above them. 

Then Lamia floated up to Alice, but though she was eweet aud gra^ieful, 
Alice liked Eve the best of all, 

She turned tr» speak to the Preddeut again, and found she wtm juat calliuf^ 

the meeting to order, 

'' Ladies/* said Eve, aa she rapped on the table with a spray of apple blossoms, 

*' the businefls before the meeting is the election of new membt^rs. I pro 

pose Alice, the yomig stranger who is with ua, a* an eligiblo member of our 

Snake Club." 

Alice was duly seconded, and without more than the asunl aiitount of 
parliamentary nou&eose n^essary to a ladie«}' olub, she was unanimously 
elected. 

' * You have to stay hero ail the time, you know, ' ' said Elsie casually to her, 
** What 1 '' cried Alice, " do yon mean litf; here ? " 

** Oertttiuly ; we never go oat except once in a hundred years. Today 
waa my day out, and that's how I chanoed to meet you/' 
^' But I mm' I stay here,** cried Alice, 

" Tut, tut/' said Eve, " don*t talk hke that. You allowed youraelf to h© 
elected, and now you cau*t get away/' 

Alice stormed and fumed, and then aho cried, but the ladies were squab* 
bling over some parliamentary questions and paid no attention to her* 

At last she bethought herself of strategy. . 

Sidling up to Cleopatra, she whispered : ^ If you'U let ma just put J 




LIFE 



245 




8irO€IB8nON FOB A MONXnaNT WHICH MIOBT BB PBVBBNTBD TO OUB TBANSATZ^MTIO FBnHD. 



my head outside the door for a moment, I'll promise not 
to run away, and— 1*11 give you my boa." 

" I will,** said Cleopatra, '* if we can get a chance when 
no one is looking, and if you*ll give me the boa first." 

Alice agreed, and watching an opportunity they managed 
to open the door unseen, far enough for Alice to put her 
head out, while Cleopatra h^ld tightly to her skirts. 

** Police 11!" shouted Alice, and a burly blue-ooated 
policeman, who was passing, came bursting in at the door. 

Such a panic as ensued 1 

"It's St. Patrick I '* cried Elsie Venner. ''He's the only 
man we fear. Run — all run ! ** 

In a trice all the members of the Snake Club had con- 
cealed themselves in subterranean hiding places, which the 
policeman found himself unable to discover. 

" Who are they, Miss ? *' he asked. ** Was they hurtin* 
you?" 



"No," said Alice, **it's all right; I only want you to 
' take me away from here, and help me find my way home." 

<' Yes, Miss,*' said the policeman, who, though he was not 
St. Patrick, had been celebrating the memory of the Saint. 
**Yes, Miss, — yes. Miss." 

They soon found their way to Alice's house, but the girl 
shivered, for the blustering March wind was chill, and she 
had no boa to wrap round her throat. Carolyn Wells, 

A Queer Country. 

•* T APLAND is a strange and remarkable country," 
-^ said the eminent explorer. ** The customs of the 
people are so odd, especially during the season of court- 
ship." ^ 
** How is that? " we ask. 
" At that time, every girl sits uxx>n her own Lapp." 




DESPERATE COUBSB OF A LOVER WHOSE 




lANCES IS A CONFIRMED LIOM-HUNTEB. 



24S 



LIFE 




DRAMA! 




I 



Another Prelate on the Stage. 

A VIVACIOUS young widow, whose for- 
C\. tu ne in case of her second marriage 
oefl to the church, is the disturbing element 
u the otherwise placid life of the bishop who 
fpires a.B the real hero of the play now at 
he ^Unbattan. He is the real hero because 
he other characters are conventional, and a 
modpm bishop who can let a fortune which 
might go to his diocese slip through his fin- 
gers and go into secular hands is a hero 
indeed. The more is this remarkable 
m this bishop shows himself a most 
adroit match-maker. His gifts 
in this line he uses to divert the 
affections of his ass of a nephew 
in the direction of a youAg and 
colorless girl, and away from the 
vivacious widow. Between The 
Bishop and The Duchess it is a 
battle royal, with allusions to the 
ecclesiastical game of chess whiob 
gives the play its title, "The 
Bishop's Move." It is by John 
Oliver Hobbes, and contains a 
number of— not tod many — clever 
epigrams which are not forced 
into the dialogue as is customary 
with epigrammatic playwrights, 
and therefore are twice as effective. The whole thing is quietly 
satirical in the matter of the Koman Catholic clergy, but Mrs. 
Craigie has made her satire subtle for obvious business reasons. 

" The Bishop^s Move " introduces Mr. William H. Thompson as 
a star. Mr. Thompson would probably long ago have been known 
in this capacity had he assumed a romantic stage name instead of 
sturdily and honestly adhering to his own commonplace and easily 
forgettable one. Stage students remember him long and agreeably 
as a most conscientious and able artist who has never done any- 
thing badly, and many things very well indeed. The present part 
fits him admirably. His sonorous voice, dignified grace, delight- 
ful reading, gentle, almost caressing manner and quiet sense of 
humor belong absolutely to the man of the world who is 
also a prelate of the church. Dorothy Dorr's Duchess 
is hardly a competent foil to Mr. Thompson's Bishop. She 
has very little of the requisite French piquancy which should 
supply the contrast to his impressive qualities. In the last act her 
deliberation and slowness almost bring ruin to a play which at 
best is not written in sprightly measure. Mr. Worsley, the 
Bishop*s nephew, whose matrimonial doom seems entirely in his 
uncle's hands, so little character has the youth himself, is not 
exactly an ideal jeune premier either in personality or methods. 
But the part is a silly one, about as silly as that of the young girl 
Barbara, to which Deronda Mayo brings more intelligence than it 
deserves. 




:hetropoutah 

:=-^ OPERA -ti 

iilnfft 




is a fbol^ 
very far 



HE BISHOP'S MOVE" is far from being 
either a great or strong play, but it is 
simple, clean and amusing. After the deluge of 
musical comedy and unwholesome, unnatural 
rubbish dumped on the American stage by the 
Theatrical Syndicate as the sole theatrical diet for 
which the American public hungers, it is refresh- 
ing although not exciting. It would probably — 
outside of Mr. Thompson's acting — ^rouse scant interest were there 
more plays of even ordinary merit to be seen. But the public sits 
through this little pieoe with evident attention and enjoyment, an 
evidence of its sense of relief fW>m the kind of stuff which has 

been forced upon it. 

• • • 

A NOELS might 
-"- well fear to 
tread the 
path Herr 
D i re k t or 
Conried 
has rushed 
in on. 
This is not 
meant to 
imply for 
an instant 
that Herr 
Conried 
for he is very, 
removed from 
that. Id fact, in every- 
rhing h« has so far 
undertaken, Herr Con- 
ried lias shown excellent 
discrjtaiiiation and that 
high urti^tie ideals. But in 
handling the toug-birdi of grand opera he 
will eiicoti titer pee itlianti^s in human na- 
ture such a^ hi* liua ntvtr before known. 
The labora <►(' Hercules were bagatelles 
in eonijmrisoii with th(»»e before him. He 
hna Liii'K^i f.ttioc!n? wishe* for his success. 
Ifoeh ii*r Oonried! 

Metcdffe. 

LIFE'S CONFIDENTIAL GUIDE TO THE THEATRES. 

Aeademv qf iftMi^;.— "Florodora.'* Production not remarkable. 

Btlafco.—*' The Darling of tbe CkKls.'* Splendidly staged and well acted 
Japanese tragredy. 

^^M.— Marie Cablll In " Nancy Brown.'* Musical comedy In the light- 
welgbt class. 

Broadway.— 'The Prince of Pllsen." Notice later. 

CaMno.—" The Chinese Honeymoon.'* Musical comedy of moderate 
excel leDoe 

CVt/erion.— James T. Powers In "Tbe Jewel of Asia.'* Musical comedy. 
Feeble In tK)ok and score. 

Daly's.— "The Billionaire. '* Musical comedy. Will not appeal to persons 
of taste and reflnement. 

Garden . — ' * Hamlet. ' ' Last week of Mr. Sotbem. 

Oarrick.—'* Mice and Men." A pleasant lirtle play well acted. 

Ilfrald Square— lAst week of "Mr Pickwick." Musical comedy, 
suggested by Dickens's story. Diverting. 

A'nicA^ftocA:^.— "Mr. Bluebeard." Musical comedy. Gorgeously staged 
but stupid performance. 

Manhattan.— ** The Blsbop's Move," wltb W. H. Thompson as Ths 
Bifhop. See above 

PrinceM.-'* The Frisky Mrs. Jobnson." Fairly amusing play of up-to- 
date society by Clyde Fllcb. 

Savoy.— •* The Olrl with tbe Green Eyes." Also by Mr. Fltcb. Also 
society. Also amusing. 

Fic^oria.— Blaocbe Walsh In '* Resurrection." Tolstoi's tale of feminine 
reformation In stage form. Absorbing. 

Wallaek^s.-*' The Sultan of Sulu.** Musical comedy by George Ade. 
Funny and tuneful. 

Wel>er and i^Mc/^V.— Burlesque and vaudeville. Not entirely a chariUble 
enterprise for the benefit of tbe ticket-speculators. 




LIFE- 



••Truth." 

»pHE *' naked truth" go^s forth nudreased^ 

'Tis shockingly bad furni. 
The "plain truth " is too plain, you see, 
The smart set to adorn. 

" Unvarnished truth " muflt i»lish up, 
That through it we mihv nee. 
The '* gospel truili/^ is jiow n myth 
And not a myiittry. 
The *• simple truth '» is simple quite, 

Has no tone, so society 
Is at a loss for brands of tmtii 
It may tell with prtjprit?ty. 

Molllf* lioxirke (OodJYt^,} 

Municipal Mots. 
JgOSTON is its own reward. 

,^ ^ A Ladysmith in the Imnd Is worth two in 
tne Bush. 

The wicked flea.whom Sau Fracciaco 
pnrsaeth. 

Chicago is paved with ^ockI inten^ 
tions. 

An ancient and a flsh-like 
Gloucester. 

Every Pittsburg has a silver 
lining. 

Washington makes strange l>ed- 
fellows. 

All's Philadelphia on 
Potomac. 

New Orleans is a lot- 
tery. 

Oh, Brooklyn, where is 
thy sting? FUtbush.where 
id thy victory? 

The race is to the New 
York. jf^ j^^ 

Pensions. 

TF, as they say, Congress 
passed no fewer than 
fifteen hundred special pen- 
sion bills during the last 
session, a broadening of the 
general pension law would 
certainly seem to be called for. 
Of course, Congress ought 
not to be spending its time 
with a multitude of special 
acts, when one general act will 
achieve the same end. 

A general law giving everybody n ,«>j,..|an 
who wants one, and is willing to vm* tM- 
Republican ticket, would virtually do away 
with this special pension business. 

QL^K: There is a woman out- 
side who says you have robbed 
her of all she had. 

Truot President : I wonder which 
one It is. 



249 




A Word to Visitors. 
gTRANGERS sojourning in New 
York should avoid all forms of 
iUness in the streets. Anything in the 
way of fits, nausea, dizzmess, or loss of 
consciousness from whatever cause is 



'^on, com, c*RL( tou kxqw wb 
*UBrr JMAKE tan*m QAtufi.'* 

can't do it. CI.AKA. iiATR tO M-ORK." 

nKATKiTsi 3>os*r YotJ CAUL thai woaur* 



regarded by ambulance surgeons— or 
thugs — as inexcusable drunkenness, 
and treated accordingly. 

More than one good citizen has lost 
his life from this little peculiarity of 



LjFE 

W 



i-m. 



^^m^f^^ 



No Stop-Over. 

A BRAND-NEW baby and it smother 

"^^ once got on a train which was bound 

through to RnddTville. Before the train 

got to its first stop, a man came through, 

'and said: 

*' Dear lady, the next station is the Pep- 
tonized, Concentrated, Infants* Essence of 
Idfe Station. If you want that baby of 
yours to thrive, you*d better get oflf here.'* 
And he handed her a circular. 

The lady smiled and thanked him, but 
shook her head. 

The train stopped and passed on, but 
before it slowed up again, another man 
came through, and said : 

"Madam, you'd better get off at the 
next place with your charge. We are com- 
ing to the Modified, Peptogenized, Sterilized 
Laboratory Station, and unless you get off 
here, I won't answer for that child's life." 
The lady thanked him politely, but kept her seat. 
By and by the train, which had passed this celebrated 



station, slowed up again, and another man 
came up. 

** You must surely get off here," he said. 
** This is the Pasteurized, Constituent, Sepa- 
rated, Plasmonated, Stuffing Baby Feed- 
ing Station, Patented. This is the right 
place. * ' And he showed her a sample photo- 
graph of a patient three months old and 
weighing at least three hundred pounds. 

But the lady was obdurate, and kept her 
seat. 

Finally, the train, after passing by 
a hundred or more other stations each 
labeled with startling letters, came to the 
end of its destination, Ruddyrille. 

When the mayor of the place, who hap- 
X>ened to be at the station, saw the mother 
and child alight, he came forward and 
said : 

" My dear madam, how in the world did you 
succeed in getting that baby through with- 
out stopping off anywhere on the route ? '* 

" Easy enough," said the mother. ** Don't you see that 
I came on a good, old-fashioned milk train? *' Tom Mcuaon. 



Ad Infinitum. 

(Dr. Dempwolff, of Berlin, anDounces that he has found an 
aquatic insect which preys upon the anopheles mosquito. He is 
cultivating the creature artificially, with the expectation of de- 
stroying the mosquito and the host of germs which inhabit its body.) 



THEY'VE found the bug 
That eats the bug 
That fights the bug 

That bites us ; 
They've traced the germ 
That kills the germ 
That chews the germ 
That smites us. 

They know the bug 
That knifes the bug 
That stabs the bug 

That jabs us ; 
They've seen the germ 
That hates the germ 
That biffs the germ 

That nabs us. 

They've chained the bug 
That bolU the bug 
That jolts the bug 

That bings us ; 
They've got the germ 
That gulps the germ 
That nips the germ 

That stings us. 



They hold the bug 
That scolds the bug 
That told the bug 

To pinch us ; 
They chase the germ 
That helps the germ 
That cheers the germ 

To clinch us. 

They've struck the bug 
That slays the bug 
That flays the hug 

That sticks us ; 
They've jailed the germ 
That guides the germ 
That taught the germ 

To fix us. 

But still these bugs — 
Microbic thugs — 
In spite of drugs 

Combat us ; 
And still these germs — 
Described in terms 
Inspiring squirms — 

Get at us ! W. D. NesUL 




' HOW WOULD TOU LIKE TO HAVK TOUR PICTUBK TAKSN, 
•'sat, D0N*T T008 KNOW A BOT WHEN TOU SEE ITt*» 



LITTLE GIRL?*' 



LIFE 



25J 






;'''!i ta 



C '!■ 







,^' 



■•.I-''' 






"D EHOLD her here, a vision 
-*-^ Of idleness supreme ; 
And see with what precision 

The pencil traced the dream : 
Her throat, a bower of blisses ; 
Her lips, a lure for kisses ; 
Her eyes, the blue abysses 

Wherein the love-lights gleam. 



A Day-Dream. 

What tender fancies waken 

Behind that forehead white, 
Above whose dawn are shaken 

Her tresses spun of night ! 

And in those twin stars under. 

Kindled with love and wonder, 

What wealth there is to plunder, — 

What measureless delight I 



She is a matchless May-dream, 

A graceful, girlish thing 
Lost in the first, sweet day-dream 

Of love and song and Spring : 
Shapely and fair as Juno, 
Not more than one or two know 
Her name ; but. Sweetheart, you know 

It is of You I sing ! F. D. S, 



LIFE 



l%S(fl')f>V)h!(\h\^ 




MASCAGNI'S ODE TO AMERICA. 



(From the Unpubliahed Writings to P — t — o 

Jf — a — gn — .) 
O wondrous land of coin and fame ! 
The future shall revere thjr name. 

And in my heart shall linger warm 
The country where attachments form — 
Attachments that are great and strong. 
Unchangeable as any rock. 

Which hold us through the ages long, 
Unless we skip by 12 o'clock ! 
O wondrous land ! I pull the stops 
And play a fanfare to thy cops! 

(BctBa drum agitato. Tenor drum furioao. Trom- 
bone fortiaaimo.) 
O wondrous land ! So rich, so fair ; 
Appreciative of long hair; 

Imbued with culture ; music tossed — 
Intent on art at any cost ! 
I praise thy men and maidens, too ; 
I praise the cheer that loudly comes — 
Although a shiver rends me through 
At thought of demon-laden bombs ! 

splendid land ! Abode of peace ! 

1 tune my lyre to thy police ! 



(Baaaoon gra<Hoao. Fugel home creacendo. Xylo- 
phone pizzicato.) 
O land where the injunction grows ! 
Where law and art in conflict close ! 
I lift my feeble voice to thee 
Each time the ticket booth I see. 
O wondrous land ! I'll ever prise 
The tokens thou hast given me — 

Thou taught'st me how to advertise. 
And how to gain publicity. 
O wondrous land ! It is enough 
For me to say : "You are the stuff I" 
(Caah regiater appaaaionata. Steamahip accelerando.) 
— Chicago Tribune, 
"Now." said Mrs. Biggleson's cousin at break- 
fast on the morning after her arrival, "don't make 
company of me. I want to be treated just as if I 
were one of the family." 

"All right." replied Mr. Biggleson, helping him- 
self to the tender part of the steak, "we'll try to 
make you feel right at home." — Chicago Record- 
Herald. 

Mr. Gotham : So you are going to settle in the 
United States? 

New Arrival (from South America): Yes, sir; 



they've got to drawing things a little too fine in 
South America to suit me. Why, sir. it's got lo 
now that a man can't even get a job at overthrow- 
ing a government unless he belongs to the Retolo- 
tionists' Union and has paid his fees regularlj for 
six months! — New York Weekly. 

An Episcopal clergyman of Cincinnati was being 
shaved by a barber who was addicted to occasional 
sprees. The raxor manipulator cut the panon'i 
face quite considerably. 

"You see, Jackson, that comes from taking too 
much drink." said the man of Qod. 

"Yes, sah." replied Jackson ; "it makes de skin 
very tendah, sah. It do for a fack." — Saxby't 
Magazine. 

"Now, my lads," said the first officer, looking 
over the bridge to the vociferous crew, who were 
getting up ashes, "can't you get that work done 
without using so many adjectives?" 

There was silence for a moment or two. and then 

one of the men spoke to his mate : "What the . 

, , h-11 does the mean by h«J«c- 

tlves?" — Sporting Timea. 



LiPi is for sale by all Newsdealers in Great Briraln. Tbe International News 
Company, Bream*s Bnlldini^, onancery Lane, London, E. C, England, Aokntr. 



Established 1823. 

WILSON 
WHISKEY 

That's All! 



THBJ WILSON DIBTIliLINO CO., 
Baltimore. Md. 



High Mark 

When perfection is reached 
tbe highest mark is touched. 

Hunter 
Whiskey 

is perfect in purity, age, flavor. 
Wm. Lahahav a Son, Baltimore, Md. 




Sore Throat 

Quinay, Laryngltlf, TooalllltU and all I 
throat troubiM quickly rdlaved and | 
prompUy cnrad by tha nae af 

pydrozone 

Endorsed and recommended by 
leading physicians everyA^here. It 
cures by killing the germs, without 
injury to the patient Nature then 
promptly repairs the damage. Sold 
by leading druggists 25 cents a trial 
bottle. If not at yours, sent prepaid 
on receipt of 25 cents. 

i>ept.D,60*VlaceSt^ W«W YORK 



French Dress Fabrics 

in Blacks and Colors. 

Pointillettc, Gazoline, Flamm6che, 
Madrilene, 

Voiie Melangee, Voile Dentelle, 
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Diamantine, Damier, Violine. 



NEW YORK. 




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GEO. N. PIERCE CO.^''ZittV 
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Catalogues Free on Application. 



ROYAL L LEGRAND 



Tff£ LATEST SUCCESS OF THE ^^^ 
ORIZA-PERFUIMERY (Oiaad Friz Faris 1900) 



LIFE 



No better Turkish Cigarette 
can be made 



E^gyptian 
Deities 




GO RKGHT TO CARRMGE HEADQUARTERS 

Write to-day for our illastrated catalogue (free) which describes our goods truthfully, 
explains our method and our guarantee and makes it safe, simple and easy for you to 
get carriages, harness and horse accessories direct from our factory at wholesale prices. 

THE COLUMBUS CARRIAGE md HARNESS COMPANY. 
Factory and General Oflllce, Columbus, 0. Western Office A Distributing House. St Louis, Mo. 

Write to neaxett olBoe. 



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Avenue of Palms, California. 

To go to California with you this spring and escape inclement 
weather ^t home. California's climate is perfect. Travel on 
the Califomiot Limited — absolutely finest train in the world. 

All about the California tour in our books. 



Atchison, Topeka& 
Santa Pe R'y 



Santa Fe 



Qen. Pass. Office 

1312 Qt. Northern Bldg. 

Chicafo 




The club 

are the original bottled Cocktails. 
Years of experience have made 
them THE PERFECT COCKTAILS 
that they are. Do not be lured 
Into buying some imitation. The 
ORIGINAL of anything U good 
enough. When others are offered 
It Is ror the purpose of larger prof- 
its. Insist upon having the CLUB 
COCKTAILS, and take no other. 

G. F. HEUBLETN & BRO., SoU PrcfrOtorsf 

29 Broadway, New York, N. Y. 

Hartford, Conn. London 



Rare Old Violins 

Lnrit»iit and flD4*t ^) lection on thin contl nrMit, 
iL'OULprUlnif th« oompl«t« t:«rniirAl«<) H awl 07 
iM»|(4a<.tiioQ. Fiiii! oiittLlDifdv (fro*!' conlabiknji 
m iaiHiii^ll»i4b«!ii In flo^onuDd BiosrAt^hLtvoT 
all th » noted id iilL*r«. Ll nt an d part i cul n ra af 
tjola iniCraiQfiiDt* from t^ to ilOjOUO. Mnhtblr 
[ULjrnietitp iDfij km arranifwl^ VtaliD* Mnt on 
AATttn dftFii BiiiiMJiLntiaii, Fctrmni certificat* 
of OeEiiiiuvnimii wLth ^tich Ini^trumeEit,, 

LYON&HEALY. '*c*.'kSL* 




1 ^Ir^^ 


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Segars— 


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- MaLde in the old.faLshioned honest 


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Look for the Bull 






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John W. MerriaLin & Co. 

The Roycroft SegeLr Shop, which 
is **At the Sign of the Bull Dog" 
NEW YORK 



IF IN HASTE TAKE THE NEW YORK CENTRAL. 



•LIFE 



(gNTEMPoRAi 




"Vjsu/* concluded the raedltul rai-uriiiur, "sha 
bpcamf! Insane through ejccf?flH|v^ dancing/' 

"Onti tnlgtit say ^he wan huiiprni^ mad, 1 ^u^* 
pose," gnrglE-d the Ch*ftrful td lot.— 5a iHm ore 
American. 

Fob coDT@nioac«, renllj nuperjcr hotel t^^rvlcc 

for Kew Yorkera QuUe like l,&kf?woud^ Xew JiTsef. 

La V R£ 1.' 1>J - T HI* - P»J E8 . 

Thb Maip : Shall I daat the hrlt'-SL-brac, 
mum? 

The MiKTREBfi : Not to-day, Nor*. I donl 
think we can afford i\. — Fick-Mc-Up. 

CALlFORNtA m LESS THAN THREE DAYS 

VIA ChlE!ftg{} fltid North-'Westenj, Union Paclfle, and 
SouthtTn Pacific Rail way is from Chicago, Tbtj <dkc- 
trlC'Llehtcd "Overland Limited" provides I ho beat 
of eTflrythlng, Dlversily qf routes : finest seen err ^ 
C^mpartmiznt obuervatlou car«, hufffit-llbrflry «:ar? 
(with barber nnd bathi ; dinlu^ cara. All agents 
sell tkkcts via this route. 

ANxiottfl MoTttEB: DfttJshter, why do you per- 
eibt In reading; tbo^ pfinfiatfon&l ^rtorlee^ 

Pretty Dauqhtkr : Bt'caui^o they make my 
bafr c.ntlf maEnma, — Chicago Daili/ Sewi\ 

HOTEL V£N0OMi. BOSTON* 
CommoEi wealth Aveoue. Elect no Ughts. New and 
most appmred plumblng^ 

DocTOB : Clood'Tnorning: I How are you foet^ng 
to-d&y? 

Sick PatCHOLoolST l Splendidly, doctor; my 
nervea transmit tbe nenaatlotia of pain without a 
break ! — Uarvurd Lampoon. 

Step from the kfltlls of ^'hUFtle" to tht^ bosom of 
comfort — Old Fotiit Cotnfort, V'a. An Ideal resort . 
A postal to the Chamberlln brlo^i a booklet. 

"I'm bo sorry they can't go/* »ald the wife of ji 

dintlnsulshed actor-manager to a friend who hod 

Invited hpr children to tea, "btJl they're whooping 
the whoop^''^L.onrfoft Dai! if Nfjwif* 

AFTRR the opera, a t^hadniir dish and a plot of Covi** 
Impetiai Ej^tm Dry Ckatnpagm is Alwaya appreciable. 

PHfsiciA^f : The truth can no longer he hJoden 
madam. t am obliKed lo tpll you that your llitlr 
Bon la — er^weak-niinded ; that \^ — well, It niu,n 
h^j said— he U on tdlot. 

Mrs* ILEGHfPP : How fortuoalp It U that we 
are rich ! No one will ever not Ire It — ytic York 

W€€kllJ. 

A HKiLTn glv^^rand a bealtl] prefuerver : AblKitl'a. tbo 
Orlgmal A nguAt ura Hi r i ers. A i i\ ri i ggHta. 

"I SEE In the morn I UK paper that a New York 
woniiiu has *iiccohb fully gone through the bank- 
ruptcy court/' 

"Cotifaund V-ra \ There goe* another of tGan*fl 
exclusive privileges!" — Clr\^eUinit Plain Dealer. 

SuKBorvnis^! ttje Uotela tiny a i rolnclana and The 
BttAters nn? Itx'aled the tn^tfil ponuLar folf links In Florid*. 
The flrsL teuine gnnjod U jnftt opptjatte tHi^ i^onchern nn- 
imnco to Xh& Itojal Paine Eana, TteRiile wliich i^tandA ihc 
comfi^rtiiiiio »iu'i boaae The etmrso Men dtwn towards 
ThB DreakeT?. wliloli h aa n(»r to !he oeean hejieh nii ibe 
Ri^yal ivlnclana bf lo ihe lake, over n carper t»f itie most 
perfect lawn graa^e* 

A GEouGlA exchange has diwcoverod the meanest 
man la th& VniCrd i^tate!^. U l& aaid that he 
pumped water on hlit head, let ht« hair fri.h?ie, and 
then broke It olt, rather than pay a borber for eut- 



ViVe 



you do **'''"'<' ^rinn Trf 



"ibiQ " 





A pure ryei 
flO years old, ajfe^d 
by time, 
(tiot artificially 



[Whiskey 
Green Label. 

At All Flmt^Ctiua I>eAler9. 



MORTON TRUST COMPANY 

3S Nassau Street, New York 

Capllal. - - - $2,000,000 
Surplos and Uadivlded Profits, $5,815,982 



OFFICERS^ 



hfX\ 



P, WtmTON. Preaidefit 
THOMAS P RVAM. Vic«^ProsJd«nt 

IhMWJ^ IC.CORQ]l£RE.2d Vice-Preat 
H, H. FR^INCTS, S*cr*rari» 

G. L lA^'IL^IERDlMO, Aaac Secretary 

H. tl, ^tiHRV. Truar Qlllcvr 

EXECUTIVE COMMITTEE : 

Levi P. Morton Joseph C. HendriJt 

Tnoniiut F R;an JaoieN N Jarvlu 

Edward J Berwind Geofae Foster Feabody 

«. f!. Haven Jacob II. fcehUT 

wniiam €, Whimej 



WASSERMANN BROTHERS 

STOCK BROKERS 
40 EXCHAE^GC PLA(T. NEW YORK 

Memberi ot N«w York Stock EzcbaEige 

BRANCH OFFICES: 

rsa Finh ATeoiie triaiti BaiiS . 

Wlndaor Aroade, oomer A^llk gt aod £th Ave, 

A*rt»r Court ( Waldorf- Astorl* HoiH> 

Imperial noteL 

A W«st J«tb St., oppoai re Martin "a RearaiumnL 

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OLD eR©W RYE 



A 
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H. B. KIRK & CO., 
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-LIFE- 

lon dondcjTi] uTHMwiSrEB 



surely goes straight to the 
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Guaranty Trust Co^ of New York 

IHatoal litre Bulldlns, 

NASSAU, CORNER OBDAR STREET. 
LONDON OFFICES 83 LOMBARD ST^ E. C. 00 ST. JAMBS ST., S. W. 



Fiscal Agents of the 
United States Geternmeot. 



} 



Manila, Piillippine lalands, 
Heng Kong, CkiM. 



} 



Oepository of tlie Qevernment ef 
vim Pliillppine isiaads. Maiiiia. 



Capital, $2,000,000 Sorplas ant Undivided Profits, $5369,000 

INTEREST AI.LOWED ON DEP081TH SUBJECT TO CHEQUE OR ON CERTIFICATE. 

Acts as Trustee for Corporations. Firms and IndlTldnals : and as Qoardlan. Ezecaior and Administrator; 
Takes entire cbarge of Real and Personal Estates; careniUy selected securities offered for investment. 

TRAVELERS' LETTERS OP CREDIT AVAILABLE IN ALL PARTS OP THE WORUX 
COMMERCIAL LETTERS OP CREDIT ISSUED. 

DRAFTS on all parts of Great Britain. Prance, Germany, Uliina and Plillippines BOUGHT and SOLD, 

WALT. I Q. OAKMAN, President! AURIAN ISELIN. JR.. Vice President. 

GEORGE R. TURNBULL, 2d VlcePrest. HENRY A. MURRAY. 3d YlcePreaident. 

WM. C. EDWARDS. Treasurer. JOHN OAULT, Manager Foreign Department. 

E. C. H'.BBARD, SecretAt- F. C. HARRIMAN, Assistaat Treasurer. 

R. C. NEWTON, Trust Officer. 

DIRBCTOBS : 

George F. Baker. R. Somers Hajes, 

George S. Bowdoin. Edwin Uawley, 

August Belmont, Obarles R. Henderson, 

Frederic Cromwell, Adrian Iselln, Jr.. 

Walter R. C llette, Augustus D. JuUUard, 

G. G. Haven, ,. James N. Jarvie. 

E.. H. Ham nan, Richard A. McCurdy, 



Levi P. Morton. 
Alexander B. Orr. 
Walter G. Oakman, 
Henry H. Rogers, 
H. McK. Twombly, 
Frederick W. Vanderbllt, 
Harry Payne Whitney. 



Londcn CommUteet ARTHtm J. FRASER, Ctiatrman; DONALD C. HALDKMAN. 



A WEEKLY MAGAZINE 



$2.00 A YEAR 



10 CENTS A COPY 



Is made for thoughtful people and contains 60 pages of reading matter, wHh occa- 
sional illustrations, divided into f jur main departments : 



THE SURVEY OF THE WORLD~-A luminous and 
strictly unbiased account of the important 
events of the weelc told in brief para- 
graphs. 

EDITORIALS— The Independent's interpreu- 
tion of these events, discussed positively 
and fearlessly in every field of thought — 
Sociology, Religion, Art, Literature, 
Science, Ethics, Politics, etc. 



SIGNED ARTICLES— By the leading authonties 
in the world. "The Independent prints 
more articles from the ablest writei^than 
any other paper in the United States." 

BOOK REVIEWS— All the important books pub- 
lished in the English language reviewed 
by experts who cannot bo deceived by 
what is faulty or trivial. A helpful guide 
to the book lover and book buyer. 



to tliese four departmaoto EVERYTIIIN6 of fanprn-taace in the whole world is treated. 

SEND 25 GENTS FOR TRIAL SUBSCRIPTION 

OF EI8HT (8) CONSECUTIVE WEEKS 



THB INOEP1CNDBNT, 130 Fnltoa MrMt, New York 



If you drink Ale 
for Ale's aaket order 

Evan? 

Ale 

Once you try It, 

You'll keep on buying it. 

BettMinuitB and D«iUeni ErerTwhere. 
a B. EVANS A SONS. E^ 17M. Bodaoo, N. Y. 



Importattons for 1902 of 

G. H. MmfA & Co/s 
Extra Dry 

were 407 , 304 bottles 
more than any other brand* 

The Famous 1898 Vintage of Mumm's Extra 

Dry, now arriving, is destined to make 

a still more emphatic increase. 



IP UNSCRUPULOUS DEALERS 
serve their customers m ith an inferior, 
impure and incorrect Mineral Water for 
the sake of saving two or three cents on a 
siphon, WHAT MUST YOU EXPECT 
OP the QUA'LITY of their other goods? 

CARL N. 8CNULTZ 



Tolephon* Connection. 



480-444 First Ave., N.T. 



To (hose who 

are Inl^rr^trd 

Enough to forward ti ctni^ 

^0 covfT iraNlnE* 1 wilj sen J frw* 

'^bookltils and ot^ef miitlcrf tncludinj;^ 

^niftng^ other thl^nes, "How ShjlJ a YounzM*n 

■^SuCCfflJ?*'. *'Thft lll^oftune of Brother BiU," 

**0!her P^o^^lit's Brains/' '"Who ShouSd Study AJvef- 

iisin^ " *'WTiv Advertlslnir Should be Studied. '*Why 

I mnd How Advertising c*n be Tani«ht,'* 

CN4iLES ALSm lUTtS, 1 33 t«iiuii St., Kew Vwfc. 



Under THIS Cover 

IS THisai^MBi^^ OUR 

i i^.-^H CATAID&UE 

i. 1 WILL 

' I , RAISE 

/ 1 ^ , ^THIS 



Standard 
Operators 
Can Do 

1 More Work 

cm the 



I W hich writes in piai/i sigM^ 

VV llliams iiun on afiv other Typewriter* 

|.=ypCCl£ll ITICC ,,i^^ UTritor>% Trial 
3i>:)rhLne^ ^^n\ in reiiiiotisible paitiesn 

WILLIAMS TVPE1M?ITE« CO.. Deffcy. Conn, 
Lu MMi M ^ 1 oj Sv TUKi* ht^ I m n rr ..^ ^ ^ . , s V A s ua*. 



LIFE 



Humorous and Serious 

LITTLE imagination is required to believe The AngeLu^ human. It has its Humor- 
ous side too, in the coniraeu it brings to each owner. 

Here arc ibe first and later orders of two men who are members of the Anj^clus 
Music Library. Each member has bis choice among thousands of compositions and 
each can change his music as often a^ he pleases. 



First Mflfi 

wtKk llk«B 

popular muilo, 
ordered: 

AWaltnt 
AXarohefl 
SNatioiuaAlri 
ftOpeiwtio Beleo- 

tlons 
AOldSonirt 
A Goon Bong* 

One Year Latt r 
he ordered : 

4 Worn B«etlioT«n 
AFromLlBrt 
1 Ftom Huidel 
AFromOhopln 
IFtomBlBot 
• PopnlArAln 




Second Man 

%kho baa atud* 
If^d tuuilo, or- 
dered i 

Twentf-foor rollg 
Including oholc- 
eHt ••leotiona 
from Bach, Bee> 
thoren, Haydn, 
Chopin, Schu- 
mann, Mosart, 
Mendelaaohn and 
Wa^rner. 

One Ytar Later 

he ordered : 

Ten faroritea 
from hit time> 
honored old oonw 
poaers and foor- 
teen of the latest 
popular aelec- 
tions in the U 
brary coUectloiL 



The first man keenly enjoys symphonies and sonatas, the very names of which 
were formerly unknown to him. The other man, who ordered some ** stuff " in order 
to please his children and friends from time to time, now appreciates the fun and 
swingr of jolly music when it is properly played. The Angelus has added capacity for 
enjoyment to each of these music lovers. 

THE ANGELUS 

EXPRESSION DEVICES 

WHILE the beginner is satisfied at first with merely a loud and soft pedal attach- 
ment, he quickly understands the expression devices which are found only on 
The Angelus, and by means of which the performer subdues treble or bass, 
accents a note or phrase, retards or accelerates a passage without changing the tempo 
indicator. 

Every Angelus music roll is so simply but completely marked that the novice can 
see at a glance how to play with correct time and expression. 

The best music stores will gladly show The Angelus and we will mail handsome 
booklet free. 



THE WILCOX & WHITE CO. 

Main Offices and Factory, MERIDEN, CONN., U. S. A. 



We Invite Your Deposit Account 



55 Cedak Street, New York 

WEBT end office, 73d street and BROADWAY 
CAPITAIi AND SURPLUS 

FIVE MILLIONS 




Harvard's Seal 



In eniboffned gilded 

a meted ; a perfect fac- 
P^tnilti of ojrljzlnal. 
M on u ted on Jh 1 ernlph 
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Delivered anyvliefc 
ma receipt of ft2- BO- 

AtiK». aemlw of Yale. 
I-rl II e^'toii, p* EitiOjlTaiila, 

HfrnO i*rltie, or c.'omTikHff 

K4r ur Mix tor sr^.oo. 

Jii^ tlie tliLnir tof t>9ti 
deear^tiuna. 

DECI L H. SHERMAN k CO.. 27 Satrth tl tfi St., PhUaHtipk^ 



JFrom J.IFB reb. 96, 1903. 

"IR. i J. DiWSOl 

HAH ACHIBTBD RBMAJaKABl^S 
RESCL.T8 

in his story 

HIDDEN MANNA 

IT IS A REAL STORY 
OF REAL MOROCCO 

Gathered bit by bit at the gates of the strange 
cities, and in the. bazaars where news and 
gossip are bought and sold. To write it the 
author has first become a Moor, and his 
tale is 
SATURATED WITH THE SPIRIT OF ISLAM." 

^T* 1 ToL 12mo, cloth, $1.60. 

V For wl* by all bookMllen or Mut bj mmil p<w^»atd oo 
receipt of price by tbe pabiiahert. 

A. 5. BARNES & CO., 



New Yprk. 



^^ -A-FXi E -^^r O O D 

NEAR CINCINNATI, OHIO. 
A Sanatorium eetabilahed In 1876 for the jtrivate care and 
medical treatment of Droff and Alconollc Addlr- 
tlona, Tboosands having failed elsewhere have been 
cured by us. Home Treatment IT l>eelred. 
Address The Dr. J. L. Stiphsnb Co., Dep. 77, Lsbanon. U. 



THE CITY OF NEW YORK, 

DEPARTMENT OF TAXES AND ASSESSMENTS, 
MAIN OFFICE. BOROUGH OF MANHATTAN. 
NO. 280 BROADWAY. STEWART BULLDING. 
January 12, 1903. 

NOTICE IS HEREBY GIVEN, AS REQUIRED 
by the Greater New York Charter, that the book« 
called "The Annual Record of the Asseaeed Valuation 
of Real and Personal Estate of the Boroughs of Man- 
hattan, The Bronx, Brooklyn, Queens and Richmond, 
comprising: The City of New York," will be open for 
examination and correction on the second Monday of 
January, and will remain open uotll the 
1ST DAY OF APRIU 1»03. 

During: the time that the 1>ooIl8 are open to public 
inspection, application may be made by any person 
or corporation claiming to t>e aggrieved by the as- 
sessed valuation of real or personal estate to have tbe 
aame corrected. 

In the Borough of Manhattan, at the main o*o«-2i 
the Department of Taxes and Assessments. No. 289 
Broadway. 

In the Borough of The Bronx, at the office of the 
Department, Municipal Building, One Hxuidred and 
Seventy-seventh Street and Third Avenue. 

In the Borough of Brooklyn, at the office of the De- 
partmeat. Municipal Building. 

In the Borough of Queens, at the office of the De- 
partment. Hackett Building. Jackson Avenue and 
Fifth Street. Long Island City. 

In the Borough of Richmond, at the office of the 
Department, Masonic Building. Stapleton. 

Corporations in all the Boroughs must make app»- 
cation only at the main office in the Borough of Man- 
hattan. 

Applications in relation to the assessed valuation or 
personal estate must be made by the person assessed 
at the office of the Department in the Borough ^here 
such person resides, and in the case of a non-resident 
carrying on business in The City of New York, at 
the office of the Department of the Borough where such 
place of business Is located between the hours of iw 
A. M. and 2 P. M., except on Saturday, when ft".*K 
plications must be made between 10 A. M. and I* 
noon. JAMES L. WELLS. President, 

WILLIAM S. COGSWELL. 
GEORGE J. GIL.L.E8PIE. 
SAMUEL eTRASBOURGER, 
RUFUS L. SCOTT, . 

Commioaloners of Taxes and Anessm«Hi> 



LIFE 



r 



£VlRr0N$MSKS'H(Wf^Rf 




TELL5 THE DISTANCE EXACTI.Y 

"* Vt-cder Oao meter aiii lit It oji jfour W'l\i\ t*'» *o tbnl I 

bi* t'*uf. Hi) 1& not Afmld of ihu reoord If *^lil (nnko.^ 

Mnil*! ill hU *h ht-el r atw for evfrrTrthliiirth»t tiBe* ttii* rciod, 
anthill) oi>i 1 e, hort*a or i-y t*' ^. In d rfl*? rl ii}f ■ ' ato diuut!t«i r 

TtKDII W?&. CO,, 7 aargMSt Stntt, Bvtioril. Cimd. 



^wB^i S0fit»/jc«B are Best 
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WHITMAN'S 

Chocolates and 

ConfcctiotM, 

WHITMAN'S 

Initantaneouiy 
OhocolEit«. 

mjadflplhlK. 



r^: 



) 



^ WE 
PAY 

POST- 
ACE. 



All Toa bave g:neMed abooP 
life inBantDcemay be wroDff. 
If yoa wish to know tbe tratb. 
lend for ** How and Why," 
iMaed by the 

Pknn Mutual Lifk, 

ttn-S-6 Cheetnut Street, 

^^^^hllad^ghja^^^^ 



BROWN'S 

Bronohtai Troehes 



Sold in Box99 only, Aoold Imltatlont, 




STALLS BOOKS 

A Man witb a Message 

Millions of people always await 
the man with a real message. 
Dr. Stall has found it so. His 
books are already circulated in 
every land. 

278tli thouMuid In Bnffllsh. 

They are being translated into 
several languages in £uropc 
D*. STALL and two in Asia. 

THE SELF AND SEX SERIES 

has the unqualified endorsement of 
. Jqaeph Cook Bishop Vincent 

V.C.M. Sheldoo Anthony Comstock 
ViP. B. Meyer ••Panay" 

^eodore L. Cuirler Prances B. Willard 
^... rancis B. Clark Lady H. Somerset 
Bmiaent physicians and hundreds of others. 
4 BOOKS TO MEN. By Sylvanus StaU, D.D. 
WHAT A Young Boy Ought to Know. 
WHAT A Young Man Ought to Know. 
What a Young Husband Ought to Know. 
What a Mam of 45 Ought to Know. 
4 BOOKS TO WOMEN. By Mrs. Mary Wood- 
AUen, M.D., and Mrs. Emma F. A. Drake, M.D. 
\ir^ A Youifo Girl Ought to Know. 
^ti^ ^ Young Woman Ought to Know. 
What a Young Wifb Ought to Know. 
What a Woman of 4 5 Ought to Know. 
9r/€r c0/y, post free, Sendjor tabU 0/ content*. 

VIr Publishing Co. ^S^S^ fiSIS^pr 




IMPLEX 

PIANO PLAYER- 

'* ft Mmkies Mu%i€iMnM of Vm Ati " 



H:u a ir^ffnesi atifl elasticity of 



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The elTccta obtaLtiar>Io with the 
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conceived a pJauo placer capable of* 



^^^\f*f ffhf*^f t ^ 




'' No inher Envenlloa of Itn kind (;ax) 
ni^iare wUh It la iwiy way/* 



'i^i. 




"More eftBDy manipulated phyaU 
rally. Its posjlbllltteB areffmatfir tUan 




Thi^r^ la uu conip&rlsoti bplw««i^ 
the piiHislhi^ltlPB of thfl Slmt>l«x aacl 
a.11 y ( h f' r 1 1 II] H ar Ln9tni]ii(.^ii t " 




Prijtl Liciii(( ;i rlraiuatic f-flett fstr tbfl 
jttudy of r<>]«a wblcli I have lound In 
00 oUier p!a^er." 



IIMllllillMlil 

Voii Can Render All Cl&^ses of Mtjsic- Yoxi Can Play Any Pifttio. 

r * * 1 ■ 1 ■ 1 ■ ■ t ■ 1 1 1 * ■ ■ ■ ■ ■ I 




PRICE, $250.00 

Send for UIustrHted bookM of the SIMPLEX, The music for the SIMPLEX embraces the widest 
possible range* aod is obtainable at a moderate cost through the music libriiries that have been estab- 
lislied at all the principal SIMPLEX Agencies. Th« Music CataJog will be sent on application^ 

THEODORE P, BROWN. Manufacturer 
27 May Streetp Worcester. Mass. 






CAPIITAL., £1)000,000 






ftUBPLUSt $£00,000 



A. iMaEKtit Kuaaia, a«?t. 



'^Kin6^(?r dimd Ctomjjaun 



Atijrn«t I^olmont 

Jfiliti Koi 
AnnJlr^w Fr^odmaii 

It^^bqrt L* Citing 



Bf>b«H Wa'loii Q<Klet 
Joim If, H*li 
K-nopht r^lm 
ViUlt*m J4]r 
WillUm n LFfNls 



FlTTH Aviura ^JfD FO&TT-SEVl!*rT)J hmtfT, NtW YuUS 

DriiECTOli!* 

Cord «c-T(-r Rol^rt a Ptbth 

i^^vwL'Amw J o r»Ufi J . lUil U bit 

l>Qlanc«/ "SiiriM I'hlllp 8ti><nh ion 

Dftiii«.l "'D»j Kbm \\. tlitinittA 

CtaAiu I^thnip riM,-Ic Jftlth^ TllUtiM>;.i11 

Uorton F. I'lont OorDvlhifi Vaadcrtiat 



Charle? B^ Vph Eirmit 
Ctua, l\. WptniujT- 
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Jolin AJvia Voon^ 



•LIFE 



lfarcIil9,iM8. 



The U. 5. 



"Long Distance'' 
Automobile Co.'s 

TOURING CARS 

Built for American Roads 




Tbuo Cjrliftifer^ Vertical Engine 
Trice. ^2SOO.OO 

Built for service, long runs and hill climbing. Simply 
operated, free from vibration. Each part easily reached, 
no intricate machinery to get out of order. 

TYPE A. RUNABOUT ----,--- $1250.00 
TYPE B. TONNEAU -:---.--, 1500.00 

Oiy book is of unusual jnierest to 
Automobilists. Sent free on request 

U.S. Long Distance Automobile Co. 

110-*1H West 41st Street, N^w Yoric ' 
Factory, 307 Whiten St., Jersey City 





Bordeaux 
Wines 

CLOSSMANN & CO. 

Foanded 17701 



Chateau 
IVIalleret 

Grovrn on the tstoie of 
Mti P«iul Clossmann* 



Oiher Clossmann 
brands constaniJy on 
h&nd. 

Booklei of Qtir wines 
sent upon request* 

C it. ARNOLDS CO., 

AGfNIS FOR tJ*S., 
27 South William St., 

NEW wm. 




N^OFL 



C1G/\RETTEJ 



A STANDARD OT 

EXCELLENCE UNJURR/UJED 



STUDEBAKEI ELECTIIC AUTOII«BllES 

N« Expert Ckaslftmr Ne«4ei. 

Wide TOurioff&dlQC ▲ SacoMtfol Hffl CHntar. 

BoiooChOpemtion. Sellable Brake ControL 
Greet Struirth of Oonelractlon. 




DeecripttTeCalaloffiieoiiAppUcetioo. OMibe*f*"J^^ 
lowtDff Repodtoriee. whero wealK) riwwaftill BMW 
(be oelebreted Tehloiee mad 



Stodeteker BrOa Oo.^of New Toifc BroedWW» "Tg^ 
Are., OCT. Wh 8t, Neir*Tork CltjiBta^belw Broyy^ 



STSio 



Go., ror. lAth and Blake ^^^^SBWvr,Cai.i»»^g^J^ 
Co., of Utah. W7 to IM State 8t, BallLekeOtter. 5*gi "^ 
baker ^roH/Mtg. Co., S17 to S19 Bm 8t, I^^^^^^l^S^ wu** 

O. Aartin A Co., Frorldenoe, B. I. ; ^5£*S£Lt WdT; 



Br«i 

meker. 
H. O. I 
bUe Exobange^ Fatereon, 






Proepect St.. COereland, Ohlot ■••*■ ^■'2?^ £» Beee 8t, 
Oolambae, Ohio ; Cindnnatl Antomolifle Co,, tin wwe ^ 
ClAciima^OUo; Tlie Baleej AutomoWle Oc^ «» «*" «^ 



pukbb or tmc 4. w. phatt eo., nkw vorr. 



VOLUME XLI. 



NEW YORK, MARCH 26, 1903. NUMBER 1066. 

Entered at the New York Post omce aa Second-Class Mall Matte^. 
Gopyrlgbt, 1902, bj Lifb Pubushino Company. 







copvmoHT worn orkat biiitain by jamkb hknocrson 

UNOKR THE ACT OW ie»1. 



Llht 




The Sign of the Rock 

THE PRUDENTIAL 

Which Furnbhes Life Insurance Protection 
for Men, Women and Children 



Investmeot UaexceUed 



Secarity Absolute 



*fViV^ /br Parftirtt/afS a/ Vmir Age. Depi. O. 
JOKN F. DRYDEN. THE PRUDENTIAL HOME OFFICE: 



NEXT WEEK (TuQsday, Maroh 81) 

THE EASTER LIFE 

A DOUBLE NUMBER 

WILL APPEAR 



Among the Contributors to 

Artists :. 

Charles Dana Gibson 

E. W. Kemble 

F. W. Read 
C. H. Ebert 
F. T. Richards 
Otho Gushing 
W. Balfour Ker 
Orson Lowell 
John Cassell 

E. W. Blaisdell 
Arthur Young 



This Number Are 

Writers : 

Marguerite Merington 
E. S. Martin 
James S. Metcalfe 
Felix Carmen 
Tom Masson 
Clinton Scollard 
Edw. L. Sabin 
Frank Roe Batchelder 
Alexander Ricketts 
Carolyn Wells 



^N'T FAIL TO GET IT. 



PRICE. TEN CENTS 




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have been in successful service since 1895. The latest models 
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COLUeU 24-0. p. (lASOLENE TOUItlNfi CiR 



Maffc XLL 




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Trice, - ^5,000 

COLUMBU UfiHT EECTRIC RUNABOUT 

Me.sk XXXVnL 




One of the sensations of the New York and Chicago Shows. Most con- 
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Forty miles on one charge of battery. 

Trice. - ^900 

ELECTRIC BROUGHAMS, HANSOMS, COUPE5, 
CABRIOLETS, TONNEAUS, SURREYS, VICTORIAS, 
RUNABOUTS, SPECIAL SERVICE WAGONS, 
BUSSES, WAGONETTES, DELIVERY WAGONS, 
TRUCKS, PATROL WAGONS, AMBULANCES ^ ^ 
CaUlogne aad fall iaforiMtioii will be teat on request 

Blectric Vehicle Company 

HARTFORD, CONN. 

NEW YORK SALBSROOMS, Wert 3Ptll St., opp. Mctropolltui Opera Heow 
BOSTON, 43 Colombui Ave. CHICAOO, 1431 MIcUgu Ave. 



LIFE 




The Delineator for April 

awaits your request to call upon 
you with its complete collection of 

the 70 Styles for Spring 

It has also many items of news to discuss with you — news from Paris and London — 
important news of Easter Things — illustrated news of the Easter Hat, whole 
pages of it — and some charming stories to tell you, both Fiction and Truth ; a love 
tale of Colonial Virginia, and a true story about "The Out-of-Town House" — and 
something serious and serviceable about Servants that is certain to interest you — 
and much else to make the visit a pleasant one, for we hope to be invited to call 
again— reg^ularly 1 Your Newsdealer or the Butterick Agent will introduce us. 



A Heathen Virtue, by Martha 
McGuLLOCH-WiLLiAMS, with il- 
lustrations by Georcb Gibbs. 

Xary Xanneriar, with exclusive 
photosraphs. 

Oarlotta and I« by Miles Bradford, 
with illustrations by Grace Cook. 

Xiladi, by Clara E. Laughlik, with 
illustrations by F. X. Leybn> 

DECKER. 

The Shoot-ITp at Laramie Oamp, by 
Minna C. Smith, with illustra- 
tions by Harry Stacby Benton. 

Eomee of the Past and Present, by 
Alice M. Kellogg. Illustrated. 

ThjrraVarriok, by Amelia £. Barr, 
with illustrations by Lbb W. 
Zbiglbr and Grace Cook. 

Stories and Pastimes for Children, 
by LiNA Beard, Grace Mac- 
Gowan Cooke and Charles 
McIlvaine. 

Health in the Household, by Dr. 
Grace Pbckham Mijrray. 

Embroidery, Laoemakinr, eto. 

Childhood, by Mrs. Theodore W. 

BiKNBY. 

The Kitchen, etc. 

Club Life and Oirls* Interests. 

Practical Oardeninf, by Ward 
McLeod. 



To 

The Butterick Publishing Company y Ltd. 

7-27 West Thirteenth St.y New York City: 



ff 





^/ 



sent to the address below for twelve 
months^ beginning with April number. 
Enclosed is One Dollar. 

Name 

Address 

THE APRIL EDITION lO eOO.OOO COPIE*. 



The May number of 
THE DELINEATOR 
will contain the first 
of five instalments of 



THE BOIS 
BRUL^ 



A STIRRING, 
DRAMATIC 
NOVEL BY 

Mary Hartwell 
Catherwood 

This story was revised by the 
famous author of '* LAZARRB *' 
only a few weeks before her death 

To insure receiving the 
Magazine during the 
Summer months sub' 
scribe for it NOW. 



LIFE 



VAN NORDBN 

COMPANY 



751 FIFTH AVENUE.NEAR 58^." STREET 
NEW YORK 

Capital and Surplus, $2,000,000 



Ko. 23 

A Letter of Credit issued on our correspondents in all 
parts of the world may be secured from us immediately 
without expense, enabling us to arrange now for your 
banking facilities in Europe this summer. Your decision 
not to use it later entails no charges. 



OFFICERS 
Warner M. Van Norden, Prtsidtnt Arthur Kinj Wood, Secretary <5r» Treat, 

William F. Havemeyer, Vice-Fresident William W. Robinson, A**'i Treasurer 

Morton C. Nichols, y ice- President James B. Haig, Jr., Aet't Treasurer 

TRUST DEPARTMENT 
Edward S. Avery - - - Trust Officer 



Warner Van Norden 
Warner M. Van Norden 
William F. Havemeyer 
John H Flagler 
James Talcott 
Hon. Comelioa N. Bliss 
John Claflin 



DIRECTORS 

Dumonc Clarke 
Henry F. Shoemaker 
Benjamin Perkins 
Richard L. Edwards 
John H. Washburn 
Jonathan B. Carrey 



Thomas P. Fowler 
Ernst Thalmann 
Charles W. Morse 
Mahlon D. Thatcher 
Henry H. Cook 
Henry T. Hronaon 
Arthur A. Fowler 




BARTON & GUESTIER 

BORDEAUX 

Established jy2^ 

Fine Clarets, Sauternes, and Cognac Vierge 




MONTAGNE & SONS 
45 Beaver St., New York 



JAMES DE FREMERY & CO. 

San Francisco, Gal. 



McCutcheon Wash Waists 

This illustration shows one of our new and exclusive 
models. It is distinctly tailor-made in effect, and ver)' 
stylish anci attractive. It is finished with three small 
box-plaits on each shoulder and fivt^ plaits down the back, 

converging at the waist 
line. Regular shirt 
sleeves and square link 
1 ,.C^BL Bt^ cuffs. 

Made in all sizes from 
32 to 42 inches, in 

Scotch Madras, 

$3-50, $400, and $4.50. 
Irish Dimity, $350. 
Fancy Swisses, 

j4-5o> fcoo, and $6.00. 
Shirtins: Linens, $4.50. 
Pure Linen Lawn, $4.50. 

Mercerized Cottons, 

$3.50 and $4-5o- 
Wash Sillcs, $5.00. 

Special attention given to 
mail orders. 

We publish a little bcx>k showing 

oiher models which we are pleased tu 

— ■- — »end free to LiFB readers on request. 

I James McCtttcheon&Co.,14W.23d$t,NewYork 





Operators of writing machines, especially skilkd opera* 
tors, prefer the REMINGTON, and for very good reasons- 

The Best Results 

ia the Amount and Quality of work done, and the Easc And 
Speed with which it is done, are attained only through the 

use of the i^gjjjjj^gfQjj Typewriter 

REMINGTON TYPEWRITER COMPANY. 327 Bpoidway, Ne* York 



\ 



The Unearned 

Increment. 

n^O be extolled for what 
"■- one is 

One loves, for there^s a sub- 
tile bliss in*t ; 
But there's a rarer Joy than 
this— 

Tis to be praised for what 
one isn't. 
Drank lYeston Smart. 

Relief. 
•TI> Y using a portion of 
-*-' the last million given 
by Mr. Rockefeller for the 
erection of a complete 
aquarium, the anthorities 
of the University of Chi- 
cago relieve a critical 
situation. Of course, there 
is no gainsaying the moral 
right of the press to count 
on filling a certain number 
of columns per annum 
with fish stories, and the 
obligation thus created had 
devolved upon the faculty 
of the institution duties 
that tended more and 
more to the embarrassment 
of education in its highest 
aspects. The aquarium 
will do the bulk of this 
work hereafter. 




LIFE 



261 




TYPOGRAPHICAL TERM. 

"UOHT-FACXD TYPE.'* 



HARDLY WORTH WHILE. 

**THBBI eOBS MT FSAlfti NZOKULOV IMTO THB WABB-BASIN, AMD DOWN IKTO THB TBAPl ISMD FOB TBB 
FLUMBBB AT OXCK, MT DKAR.*' 

" 1 onus HOT I HOT FOB OTU PXABL HKCKLACH I " 



2«2 



LIFE 




•• While there is Life there's Hope:' 

VOL. XLI. MARCH 26, 1903. No. 1066. 

19 WWT TeiRTY-FiRaT St., Nbw York. 



Publlsbed ereiT Tbnrsday- t>^CO » year In ad- 
▼auce. Poetacre to forei^o countries In the Po»ul 
Union. $1.14 a year extra. SuiKle current copips, 
10 cents. Back numbers, after three months from 
date of pubhcatlon. 26 cents. 

No contribution un'li be returned unless 
accompanied by stamped and addressed 
envelope. 

The illustrations in Life are copyrighted^ 
and are not to be reproduced. 

Prompt notification should be sent by sub- 
scribers of any change of address. 




and of the Kaiser's letter of comment 
and partial disagreement, make inter- 
esting reading for the light they throw 
on the position of the line which a 
pions and practical statesman draws 
between the kind of "higher criti- 
cism " that he will endorse, and the 
kind he will not. Professor Delitzsch 
is himself a religions man, and a Lu- 
theran in good standing. He is, as his 
father was before him» the most 
learned Assyriologist in Europe. He 
has kept the mn of all the recorded in- 
formation that has in recent years 
been dug out of defunct cities like 
Babylon and Nineveh, and has con- 
sidered attentively its bearing on the 
stories and historical narratives which 
have been preserved in the Old Testa- 
ment. He has found that much of 
the Old Testament's historical litera- 
ture has been verified in a most inter- 
esting manner by Assyrian and Baby- 
lonian cuneiform documents recently 
disinterred. In other cases he has 
traced back Bible stories to their 
sources, and discovered errors in the 



Bible narrative which are highly curi- 
ous and edifying, when considered in 
connection with their origin. In his 
lecture in December he told why he 
rejected the literal accuracy of the im- 
portant story of Moses and the tablets 
of stone on which the ten command- 
ments were divinely inscribed ; why 
he found the story of Jonah and the 
whale a moral tale, much enlivened by 
oriental fancy, and what was the 
source of the erroneous allegation that 
Nebuchadnezzar ate grass for seven 
years like a steer. The Kaiser heard 
his lecture, and circumstances con- 
strained him to disclose how far he 
was in agreement with the learned 
professor. He backed him up in his 
conclusions about the tables of stone, 
and, inferentiaUy, in his conclusions 
about Jonah and Nebuchadnezzar. He 
agreed that the Bible had historical 
errors in it, and was not all " revealed " 
as we have it. But he stuck out reso- 
lutely for the inspiration and validity 
of those i>art8 of the Old Testament 
which concern the divine origin of the 
religion now dominant in (Germany 
and the rest of Christendom. The 
professor doubted the Messianic reve- 
lation. Not so the Kaiser. 





rpHE Emperor's admissions seem of 
-■- more inunediate practical im- 
portance than his doubts. Let him 
cleave to the Messianic tradition and 
all it implies, and welcome I He has 
helped, and is helping, to dig out the 
truth about the older part of the Bible, 
so that pious folk may read it with 
their eyes open, unreproached by their 
consciences for their natural desire to 
know what they are reading, and 
where history leaves oflf and myth be- 
gins. The Bible is of imperishable in- 
terest, and enjoys a popularity among 
the reading public in this country that 
is unapproached by any other book. 
Whatever any distinguished leader of 
men finds to say about it is sure to 
command the attention of a vast au- 
dience. A very eminent American 
statesman who has views on all im- 
portant subjects could undoubtedly 
find congenial topics in Jonah, Nebu- 
chadnezzar, Moses, the bears that 
vindicated Elijah and the lions that 



wouldn't eat Daniel. Whenever he 
sees fit to speak about these matters, 
the people will hear him just as gladly 
as the Germans have heard their 
William. 

'X'HB Fairbanks family in America 
-^ has thought of a new thing to do. 
It is about to have itself incorporated 
as a society for the collection and 
preservation of all matters pertaining 
to the history of the family. The so- 
ciety's headquarters will be the old 
Fairbanks house in Dedham, Massa- 
chusetts, which will be bought for it, 
and there the records of the Fair- 
bankseswillbekept. This scheme has 
grown out of a Fairbanks reunion, 
which was held last August in Ded- 
ham. There are more than four thou- 
sand families now existing in America 
that trace descent from the original 
Fairbanks, and a fair proportion of 
them are solvent, so that the purchase 
and endowment of the family head- 
quarters presents no dififtculties. Hav- 
ing fun with one's forbears is one of 
the cheapest and most innocent forms 
of diversion the times afford. It is 
more interesting than postage-stamp 
collecting, and even when it runs to 
excess, as it sometimes dpes, it is not 
nearly so deleterious as the liquor 
habit. The Fairbankses will get good 
returns from their investment, and we 
shall probably see other families f ol- 
lo¥ring their example. 



'T^HE colleges and schools— Harvard 
-*- in particular— seem very resolute 
in requiring some abatement of the 
fury of football. The rules will doubt- 
less be changed, but whether the game 
can be successfully modified by cob- 
bling the rules is a question. Hobbles 
on the players might restrict activity 
a little. But why not do away with 
gate money ? That would impoverish 
the game, limit expenditure for prepa- 
ration which is now excessive, and 
tend to make the sport more of a sport 
and less of a commercial enterprise. 
When a single game brings in fifty 
thousand dollars, it is bound to be 
too important, and to be taken too 
seriously. 



LIFE 



263 



^^^^"^" 




The Race War. 



TI7ASHINGT0N : The United States weather office at Pianola, MisB., has 
• ' l)een closed. 

Recently the leading men of the place tarred and feath- 
ered the observer because he predicted the same kind of 
weather for whites and blacks, and rode him on a rail ont 
of town. He appealed to the department and was told not 
to go back. 

The President has been besought by members of Con- 
gress and others to order two kinds of weather predicted at 
Pianola, but he declines to truckle, as he terms it, to the 
mob element. 

Feeling at Pianola is very bitter. In that climate it 
is difficult to live without weather, and there is open 
talk of throwing the Mississippi delegation to Senator 
Hanna in 1904. 



** TTTHAT are your religious vie-v 
^^ "I haven't any. I am a 



I views? " 

k Democrat.** 



LIFE'S FASHIONS. 

FULL BBOALIA FOB MS. ANTBOKT COltSTOOK. 

Ideals. 
^T^HE Mormons are saying now that they go in for wives 
^ only incidentally ; the main thing is children. 

Of course, the end does not justify the means. 

The beautiful Chris- 
tian thought that babies 
come from heaven leads 
naturally to their being 
considered as foreign im- 
migrants, and finally, 
since they bring no 
money with them, and 
cannot speak or write 
English, to their exclu- 
sion. 

We cannot suffer these 
Mormons to depress our 
domestic ideals, which 
call more and more for 
the childless home. 



THIRST LAWYER: 
-*- These * people are 
kicking because we don't 
settle the estate. 

Second Lawyer : As 
if we didn't need the 
money as much as they ! 




-■OAt^Ai^ 



TBI USUAL qUBSTION OF PBBCKOBNCB. 




Pat: NOW, WOULDN*T TBAT JAB TSt JX7BT LOOK AT TBB DUTCBMAN BWIVMIN* IN THOT ICY WATBR I 



264 



LIFE 




rpHERE has been no work belonging to 
-*- the literature of reaction, gradually 
taking form in our day, more sane and 
wholesome than C. Han ford Henderson's 
Education and tfie Larger Life. Naturally, 
therefore, we welcome any new output from 
the same pen. John Peercyfieldj the Anatomy 
of Cheerfulness is apparently largely auto- 
biographical. To the mere seeker after a 
story it will perhaps hardly appeal, but as 
the confessions of a practical idealist, it is 
replete with both interest and charm. 
(Houghton, Mifflin and Company. $1.50.) 

Richard Bagot follows the preyalling fash- 
ion in Donna Diana, and rides atilt against 
the Vatican. The story hinges upon the 
efforts of a young Englishman to marry a 
Roman girl of wealth and family, whom the 
ecclesiastics haye destined for the cloister. 
The bitterness with which the author 
assails their financial probity and the relish 
with which he analyzes their moral short- 
comings are the weak points of a decidedly 
interesting novel. (Longmans, Green and 
Company.) 



CHAUNCEY 




Journeys End, by Justus Miles Forman, 
is a very pretty and a very disappointing 
story. Frank Stockton's celebrated trick of 
The Lady or the Tiger ? was very funny in 
a short magazine story. Applied to a novel 
of normal length it assumes the proportions 
of a practical joke. Journeys End, how- 
ever, shows that when the author gets over 
being funny he can write attractive love 
stories. (Doubleday, Page and Company. 
$1.50.) 

Sociai Life in the Early Republic^ by 
Anne HoUingsworth Wharton, is a hand- 
some volume dealing with the society of the 
capital during the first sixty years of our 
'national history. It is largely drawn from 
contemporary letters and other private 
sources, and should appeal to the many fe- 
male descendants of the Revolution. (J. B. 
Lippincott Company, Philadelphia. $3.00.) 

A new volume of stories by Mary E. 
Wilkins Freeman, called Six Trees, is a 
companion to her Understudies of two years 
ago, in which 6he tried to exploit the re- 
semblance of certain animals to certain 
people. She now extends to the vegetable 
kingdom the same scheme of forced analo- 
gy, and with no better success. In one or 
two instances the idea is apt, but its repeti- 



tion is distinctly artificial. (Harper and 
Brothers. $1.25.) 

The vogue of "Mr. Dooley " seems to 
have started a rage for republishing news- 
paper serials in book form. The concen- 
tration of covers, however, is a severe test. 
The Seedy Gentleman, being articles by 
Peter Robertson from the San Francisco 
Chronicle, is neither strong enough to bear 
consecutive reading, nor alluring enough to 
induce one to keep it at hand for occasional 
perusal. (A. M. Robertson, San Francisco. 
$1.50.) 

T?ie DoU Man*s Gift is a pretty story of 
the fairy tale order by Harry A. James. It 
is profusely and daintily illustrated, and 
should win the hearts of many children. 
(Qeorge Newnes, Ltd., London, England.) 
J, B. Kfrfoot, 
OTHER BOOKS RECEIVED. 

Isn't n So r By Nettle Seoley Murphy. (J. B. 
Uppmcott Company, PbUadelpbla. $1.00 ) 

Beyond the Requiems, and Other Verses. By 
Louis Alexander Robertson. (A. M. Robertson, 
San Francisco. $1.00.) 

My SpiHVit Flight Br Cecil J. Denton. (Scroll 
PabUsblng Company, Chicago.) 

A Wanderer^s Songs qf the Sea. By Charles 
Keeler. (A. M. Robertson, San Francisco. $1.00.) 

The Old School House, and Other Poems. By 
T. S. Denlson. (T. 8. Denlson, Chicago. $1.00.) 

Some Lett^s by Robert Louis Stevenson, (In- 
galls Kimball.) 



boke 




LIFE 



265 




IN THE GARDEN OF HARMONY. 
* BM OAH'T OOMB BKTWBZN US, JOHN. MT BAOLX'S BTB 18 ON Bllf / 



A Fable of Fashion. 

N elegantly at- 
tired lady, with 
a beaatifal vic- 
toria waiting for 
her at the cnrb, 
stood at the front 
door of an old- 
f ashioned and 
dignified man- 
sion in Madison 
Avenue. The butler 
- cid the mistress of the 
iiiaiisiim was at home, and 
took the caller's card up- 
stairs. 

He returned presently saying that 
his mistress wished to be excused. 
Something there was in his manner 
that the caller did not like. Just 
what, she could not say, for the man- 
ner of servants Is often vague and 
undefined. 

She drove to her own home, In a 
more expensive and modern neigh- 




borhood, and sent a note to the mis- 
tress of the Madison Avenue man- 
sion. 

By her own liveried courier she 
shortly received this reply: 

Madam : 

You have asked me to explain. You 
should know that your public disregard of 
those proprieties goyeming men and women, 
whatever their social position, makes it im- 
possible for a self-respecting woman to ap- 
prove of your conduct. To receive you 
would be approval. I do not approve, 
therefore I do not receive. I had hoped 
you would not compel me to write this let- 
ter, but as you have asked for it, I give it 
to you with no apologies. I want you to 
understand clearly my position, and you 
must respect it, whatever else you do. 

Regretting the necessity of this letter, but 
not its contents, I am . 

When the lady had finished the 
reading she laughed lightly and said 
with a little sigh: "How very few of 
the old-fashioned people are left to 
us.'" 



Then she fared forth again In her 
victoria and she stopped at many 
beautiful houses, but was turned 
away from none. 

William J. Lampion. 



Facts in the Case. 
lyrONUMENT MAN: What shaU 
I put on your husband's tomb- 
/ stone, madam? 

Distracted Widow : Oh, say that 
he was my husband, and that he is 
happy now. 

Hard to Believe. 

OHE : Yon wouldn't think Mr. Hen- 
*^ peck had been married ten years, 
would you ? 

The Old Bach.: No. Wonderfully 
well preserved, isn't he? 



p\ ASHAWAY : You don't mean to 
-^-^ say she jilted yon? 

Cleverton : She did, old man. That 
girl has the heart of a motorman. 




266 

New Preparations. 

HE great success attending 
the manof aoture and production 
of "Taka-Bita." "Feeda-Summa," 
** Chewa-Chnnka," and other 
ready-digested foods has not 
failed of effect upon the inventive 
genius of the country. The following 
labor and time-saving products will 
soon be on the market : 

JIOTTA-JAGGA. — A new whiskey, 
whose ^ intoxicating qualities have 
be^n «pent upon a neatly contrived 
machine* : Yoii don't have to drink it 
CANTA-FITTA.— Ingenious suit of 
clothes. YoH dolx't need to wear it 

OUTA-SIGHTA. — Marvelous 
achievement in eyeglasses. It is not 
necessary to look through them; 

WALKA-FASTA.— Artistic shoes, 
which have been walked ten thou- 



LIFE 



sand ndles before being placed on sale, 
don't have to break them in. 

GRINNA- GONNA.— The latest form of 
breakfast-food joke. You don't have to laugh 
at it. The manufacturers guarantee 
that all the necessary laughing is done 
before the joke leaves the factory. 

PAYA-DEBTA.— A South Ameri- 
can invention. Through its use it is 
possible to buy everything one needs, 
and not have to pay for anything. 
It's great 

SMOKA-BUTTA.— A ready-smoked 
cigar. 

•• "P)ID you hear about Coddington's 
^-^ scandal?" 
"No. What was it?" 
'* Had an intrigue with his wife.*' 

"TjIXPERIENCE is the name we give 
-*^ to our blunders. 





F 



A Pony of Love. 

iLIRT you may, you can't dishearten 
Him with whom you jest and play, 
For in Capid's kindergarten 

Love grows wiser every day ; — 

You can tease him or amuse him, 

You can please him or abuse him, 

You can seize him, too ;— but, lose him, 

Never while he knows the way ! 

Flirt you may, and turn your nose up 

At the sentimental swains, 
But when Love the rascal grows up 

There'll be losses for your gains : 
You will mind that for your fun you 
Must be kind ; — that, once begun, you 
Later find that Love has done you 

While he let you hold the reins. 

Flirt you may, all whim and laughter, 
Light of heart and fancy free ; 

Have your fling in youth and, after 
All your frolic, fVoth and glee, 

Say good-by to every crony, 

Then just fly to matrimony : 

I shall try to play the pony, — 
Won't you come play horse with me? 

Felix Carmen. 



O 



UR wishes are not as orthodox as 
our prayers. 



SNAPSHOTS IN HADES. 
OH lABCB HI WAS ALWATB LOOKOVe TOB ▲ " BOTT SVAP.' 



'^ODD : What ! You are out every 
-*^^ night until three! Isn't mid- 
night late enough ? 

Todd : I found when I get home at 
midnight my wife could talk to me, 
but when I get home at three, words 
fail her. 

A MAN with prejudices is always 
"^-^ reliable. 



LIFE 



2«7 




UNOLX DZXO TX8TXIIDAT« 8IB, AND I WANT TOU TO OmOIATS. CAN TOU BAT 80MKTHIN0 NICK ABOUT HIMr*' 

** BUT I didn't know HIM." 
" GOOD 1 TOU*&B JUST THB MAN/* 




Ill 

CO 

< 



H 
111 H 
Z ^ 



270 



LIFE 




1 1 T 1 J r 

mhm 





The Dullness of Mid-Lent. 

K flpite of the clever and high-salaried 
[lorsons in the company of Weber and 
Fields the performances given by the 
organization this season seem to 
have lost much of the originality 
and mirth -provoking characteris- 
tics "which made the early vogue of 
these entertainments. The material 
placed at the disposal of the com- 
pany this season, in the way of 
lines and musiCf has fallen con- 
siderably below the former stand- 
ard. The individual members, too, 
seem to have lost the sest and 
spontaneity which, although some- 
times demonstrated with question- 
able taste, gave unusual piquancy to anything 
done ui this house. From the present rather 
ci>iiit£]f>i] place entertainment there stands out 
QEie piece of work which, although not in the 
UigheEit field of artistic effort, is really a gem 
in its way. This ia Fay Templeton's Sarah 
Ortuie, in the burlesque *' The Big Little Princess." Any one who 
has seen Millie James's Sarah Crew in *' The Little Princess " is 
bound to wonder at the fidelity of the imitation, particularly when 
it is remembered that the original is slender and spirituelle in 
person, which Fay Templeton certainly is not. But even in looks 
the resemblance is made wonderfully close, and in carriage, 
gesture and intonation the reproduction is so exart thnt if 
anything should happen to Millie James, Fay Ten i I ~ 
ton would be a most desirable understudy. The i mi Lo- 
tion is the more interesting because it is done fio 
seriously and is very slightly exaggerated or carica- 
tured. '^The Little Princess'* was so delightful a 
performance and appealed to such good instincts in t tac 
human breast, that it seems almost sacrilege to bur- 
lesque it, but Fay Templeton's performance is so clever 
and the horse-play is so frankly horse-play that one 
doesn't resent it seriously. With, though, the materiul^ 
at command it might have been made funnier. 
- Life has occasionally remarked that it is dif- 
ficult to iiecure good seats from the box office at 
Weber and Fields's Music Hall. This is still 
true. • • • 

'IKE Diogenes looking for an honest man, the 
American critic looking for acting and actors 
has to have a lantern, a pair of binoculars 
and microscopic eyes, like the boy Dickens 
tells about who starved to death because his 
miraculous vision showed him dis- 
tinctly the living animalculse in 
every mouthful he attempted to eat. Even with 




all this equipment very little that's worth while comes into the 
critic's field of vision. The omnivorous Trust which attacks the 
vitals of everything it touches has almost eliminated living actors 
and live acting in America. The latest announcement ii that even 
the poor shadow which existed at the Empire in the I-am-going- 
away-from-here style of art is about to give up its feeble ghost, and 
that next year New York will have no stock company outside of 
the cheap theatres on the side avenues. 

Therefore, even the slenderest attempt at a play and acting de« 
serves attention, and Life sticks to its duty manfully in giving 
serious consideration to efforts which in less Trust-stricken times 
would be thought almost too trivial to notice. In 'iie case of 
" Cynthia " and Elsie de Wolfe there is, at least, an attempt to do 
something which is not musical comedy, negro cake-walking, dirty 
linen nor tommy rot. The play tells a most simple and threadbare 
story, and in the telling brings in a few clever speeches and one 
rather ingenious situation — that of a loving husband who fancies 
his wife's secret is that she has betrayed him, when the truth, which 
makes him happy, is only that she has ruined him financially. 
The English of the piece would make the late Goold Brown, 
wherever he is, do agonized handsprings, and its paucity of plot 
shows the pitiful condition of the dramatic churoh-mouse who 
wrote it. 

Elsie de Wolfe lacks personal magnetism, her voioe is unsym- 
pathetic, and the is wanting in grace, this last fact made painfully 
evident in a dance lugged in to give the play its final climax. 
The dance is not pretty and fails of its point. It might easily be 
made devilish and effective. Even with all these defect* the star 
scores in the piece and appears to better advantage than ever be- 
fore in her career. She has intelligence, distinction of manner, 
and a good delivery. With the exception of Mr. Max Freeman, 
who has a nice fat part as a Jew money-lender, the others in the 
cast are not noteworthy. 

'* Tumipe is a poor food, Ood gie us grace, but even turnips is 
better than starvation." "Cynthia" is rather amusing, and in 
these times of dearth of really good plays has a reason for 
existence. Metcalfe, 

LIFE'S CONFIDENTIAL GUIDE TO THE THEATRES. 

Academy qf MuHc.^'' The Suburban/* Notice later. 
Beiaico,—" The Darling of the Gods.'* Elatwrate and 
. artistic production of weil-acted tragedy of Japanese life. 
' ^(/OM.— Marie Cahill in " Nancy Brown. '* Musical com- 

edy. Ordinary. 

Broadway,--'* The Prlnoe of Pllsen.** Notice later. 
Casino.^" The Chinese Honeymoon.** Musical com- 
edy. Reasonably tuneful and runny. 

tYiterion—lMat week of '*Tbe Jewe* of Asia.** 
Musical comedy. It never will be missed. 

Daly's.— LAst week of ''The Billionaire.*' Musical 
comedy. Good riddance to bad rubbish. 
Garden.—" Hamlet.'* Last week of Mr. Sothem. 
Garrick— Annie Russell m "Mice and Men.** Clean 
and amusing. 

I/fra/d i<qvare.—GT%ce George in •*Pretty Peggy." 
Notice later. 

Ktiicketbockfr.—"'UT. Bluebeard.** Musical comedy. 
Handsomely mounted but chesmutty. 

Madison Sguart.— Elsie de Wolfe in '* Cynthia.** See 
above. 

Ilojt Stic.— ** The Wizard of Oz.'* Spectacular and 
clever. 

Jfanhattan.—** The Earl of Pawlncket." Bright 
and well-acted comedy. 

Ptiuceioi.-**The Frisky Mrs. Johnson.'* with 
Amelia Bingham as the star. Rather Interestmg 
society play. 
^ Savoi/.—C\^Ttk Bloodgood in "The Girl with the 

^ ► Green Eyes." Society play by Clyde Fitch. Worth 

seeiog. 
n<*^/>Ha.— "Resurrection.'* Impressive perform- 
« ance of dramatlziitlon of Tolstoi's story. 

Wal/ack'tt—*' The Sultan of Snlu.'* Melodious 
snd mirthful. 

Weber and Fields' s.— Burlesque and vaudeville. 
A little pull and considerable money will secure 
BL8II 01 WOLFI. good seats from the ticket speculators. 




LIFE 



271 





GSTTINO ACQUAIIVTSD. 

A Busy Day. 

IT was exactly nine o'clock as the President 
of the great American oollege briskly en- 
tered his office and said good morning to 
his typewriters. 
"Ladies," he said, " yon have a hnsy day 
before yon. I find that dnring the last 
month we have only taken in two millions of dollars in 
donations, and only two blocks of buildings have been 
added to onr institution. We must get a move on 1 " 

Sitting down at his desk, he touched an electric gong 
that summoned his staff of confidential advisers from the 
football field. 

<*Grentlemen," he said, as they entered, ''get to work I 
In the first place, we need more display. Put your minds 



on some n^'w and attractive begging letters to be sent out 
to millionaires. Ifo man in this country who has a cent 
to giv6 away must be allowed to escape. How many 
dnuuiners are ont? '' 
'* Eleven/' was the answer. 

** Then double the force. I heard yesterday that in New 
York alone, Mr. Rockefeller, in the whole of last week, 
had only been seen ten times. This will never do. Our 
millionaires mtuit not be allowed to sleep. I hope that 
in pix months from now we shall be able 
to add several square miles to our labo- 
ratories:. And now, let me see some of 
my professors." 
A tall, spare man entered. 
"Ah, Professor Sharper, 
what have you been doing 
lately?" 

"For the i)ast twenty- 
four hours, sir, I have been 
engaged in some original 
researches." 

** Good 1 Have these been 
reported to the papers ? ' * 

"Not yet, sir. There have 

been no results." 

• ' Results ! What do we care for results ? 

What we want is notoriety. Leave 

me at once, sir, and secure an interview with one of the 

reporters who are waiting in the anteroom. What do we 

pay you ten thousand a year for, if it isn't to furnish at 





WHBM THl THBBMOMSTBB 18 LOW. 



▲ SBADT 8T0BT. 



272 



•LIFE- 



least one magazine write- 
up a month, and a special 
to the press at least once 
a week? '* 

The Professor shame- 
facedly hurried back to 
his laboratory. 

The President began 
opening his morning 
mail. 

There was a knock at 
the door. 

A clerk rose to see who 
it was, and then came 
back and stood by the 
President's desk. "I 
have to inform you, sir, 
that the new freshman 
class is outside waiting 
to pay their respects." 

The President laughed 
strenuously. 

** What nerve I " he 
exclaimed. •* Here I am 
writing a book, making 
arrangements for a lec- 
ture tour, dictating at 
least eighteen magazine 
articles, to say nothing of 
drumming up the millionaire 
trade from Maine to California, 
and these mere students come to 
bother me. Bah I TeU'eml'm 
not at home I *' Tom Masson, 




Uhde DanH: bf that citt chap, what comflaihkd that wintsb in tbk oountrt was dsyoid of 

AXUSIN' FSATCRKS, could KB 8KSN BILL BUMSTID 8KNCB BB OOT BIB*N FBOZB, BB'D EB FOUND THAT WB 
COULD SHOW UP 90m€ THAT WAS PBBTTY ALI^PIRBD PBOMINENT, ANTHOW. 




A U. «. ARMY POST. 



It Was All Right. 

" T HAVE a great idea." 

-*- As he spoke, it was more than 
evident that the young playwright, 
whose name even now was a house- 
hold word in two continents, was more 
than ever before in his career, carried 
away by the tide of a true inspira- 
tion. 

•* Can it be possible," said the mana- 
ger, *'that your play has already ma- 
tured? Why, when we parted com- 
pany last evening, you could think of 
nothing, and now " 

•* Now," burst forth the enthusiastic 
artist, "it is finished — it is complete! 
Listen, while I tell you." 

The face of the manager showed a 
trace of disappointment. He moved 
uneasily in his seat. 

"Don't be too sure,*' he muttered. 
*'Tour enthusiasm may have misled 
you. But go on.*' 

*• Listen then. The plot? Bah 1 It is 
nothing. I stole it from the French. 
And then I fixed it up to suit myself. 



First, then, we have an opening chorus. 
The girls will come out in some brand-new 
color scheme which your designer can put 
his mind on immediately. Then some 
vaudeville specialties will be introduced. 
The scene will be laid — well, say on Broad- 
way at midnight, or on some uninhabited 
island — that doesn't matter. And here's 
a new topical song, entitled 

* But I cannot swallow that ! ' 

"Li the last act Chippie Bandoline, the 
star, is just saved from — oh, well, some 
one, and every girl in the chorus appears 
in pea-green tights." 

The manager grasped the great man by 
the hand. 

" Grand 1 " he cried. *' Simply grand ! 
Do you know, when you first si)oke, I was 
afraid you were going to propose some- 
thing entirely too good for the public." 

Limited. 
/^LARA : Did he kiss you more than 
^ once ? 

" Once and a half. He only had an 
hour." 



LIFE 



273 




J0NB8 HAS A8KBD XI88 B0BIN80M TO BIT OUT THl XSXT DAMOB WITH HUf. BOW THl POOB HUHGBT 
VniD, IHflTKAD OF TBS DABCB, THAT BBFBBBHMBNT8 HATB BVSN 8EBYXD. 



THIN08 WILL VXBL» WHBH THXT 



LIFE 





NAN'S ADVENTURES UP TO DATE. 
It Is a long time since a bit of doggerel has at- 
tracted so much attention as the Jingle about "Nan 
of Nantucket," which originally appeared in the 
Princeton Tiger. All over the country, the new:i- 
paper bards have added new verses, until now the 
adventures of the mercenary Nan make quite a 
thrilling story. We quote the original lines, and a 
few of the most amusing additions : 

There once was a man from Nantucket. 
Who kept all his cash In a bucket. 
But his daughter, named Nan, 
• Ran away with a man. 
And as for the bucket, Nantucket 

— Princeton Tiger. 

But he followed the pair to Pawtucket — 
The man and the girl with the bucket; 

And he said to the man 

He was welcome to Nan, 
But as for the bucket. Pawtucket. 

— Chicago Tribune. 

Then the pair followed Pa to Manhasset, 
Where he still held the cash as an asset : 

But Nan and the man 

Stole the money and ran, 
And as for the bucket, Manhasset. 

— New York Press. 
The pair then went on to Natick ; 
When the man thought he might turn a trick. 

They had nothing to pawn. 

As the bucket was gone, 
And the people would give them Natick. 

— Boston Transcript. 

Pa's wife Joined the party at Lima. 

So glum she appeared, they said, "Fie. ma." 



^J^WAvTMLv^ 



But she raved, "You well know 
That the bucket of dough 
Is mine." Nan exclaimed, "How you Lima." 
— New York Sun. 

So they beat their way up to Woonsocket. 
Where the Judge found their names on the 
docket ; 
When 'twas over the man 
Remarked sadly to Nan : 
"Gee! Didn't the legal Woonsocket!" 

— Chicago Record-Herald. 

But they came to the river Shetucket. 
And they still had the cash in the bucket ; 

'Twas a sad, sad affair ; 

Nan left the man there. 
And as for the bucket. Shetucket. 

— New Haven Register. 

Pa followed Nan to Jamaica, 

Where a copper did soon overtake her. 

"Where's the bucket?" he cried. 

"Won't tell," Nan replied. 
Then Pa shouted. "Judge, won't Jamaica?" 

—Ex. 

With Nan's cash Pa lit out for Miami 

But in Jail he remarked. "Now, where am I?" 

Nan said with a Jeer: 

"You're In Jail, Pa, I fear." 
And Pa sadly replied, "Oh, Miami !" 

—Ex. 
Nan's bucket was really a sack 
And she bundled it into a hack ; 

Pa weeps — good old man — 

For a far away Nan. 
Her address now Is, Nan, Hackensack. 

^New York Sun. 



In a recently published memoir of Lord Salis- 
bury there is an amusing story of Ills childhood. 
"Oh, Betty," he sighed one day to bis nurse, "I 
wish I was a cat !" 

"Why?" asked the astonished Betty. 

"When I think," said the child, "of the manj 
times I must dress and undress before I die. I wish 
my clothes grew on my back!" — Argonaut. 

A DOCTOR was attending a dangerous cmae wbere 
a Scotch butler was engaged. On callios in th« 
forenoon he said to Donald : "I hope your master's 
temperature is much lower to-day than it '^as la£t 
night." 

"I'm no sae very sure aboot that," replied the 
butler, "for he dee'd this morning." — Argonaut. 

A BTOBT is going the rounds of a youthful min- 
ister who, when he preached his first funeral ser- 
mon over a woman in a small Maine town, prai^d 
her so highly that the poor bereaved husband, sit- 
ting there listening, could not recognize her by tbe 
description. Finally, in a glowing peroration. h« 
pictured God and the archangels and the angeU and 
all the hosts of the redeemed Joyously forming a 
parade to welconie to heaven this "one of the very 
best of all women." The patient husband, who bad 
never been able to rule his own household, coald 
stand it no longer, and. leaping up. interrupted tb« 
preacher with a beckoning hand, gasping out : "No. 
no, elder; not quite that! She was only Iwat 
middlin'." — Argonaut. 

"Do you think there is any danger of Anieri<» 
being dominated by Europe?" 

"No, sir." answered Mr. Meekton. with extraor- 
dinary emphasis ; "not so long as eminent Euro- 
peans continue to marry American girls." — Wash- 
ington Star. 



LiFi is for sale by all Newsdealers in Great Britain. The International Kews 
Company. Bream*s Bnilding, Chancery Lane, London, B. C, England, Agbntb. 



Established 1823. 

WILSON 
WHISKEY 



That's All! 



TRB WILSON DTSTTLLINa CO., 
Baltimore. Md. 



Woman cannot 
conceive 

BORINE 



to be the best 

Antiseptic. 

It is ; and non-acid. 



-UK NMie B evomMNG.* 

Csterbrook 



w ft ptn 



Probate No 
ular stub 
medium 
Over 150 
otiier styles 
every pur 
stationers 
Accept no 




as at»$QUiG 
its exceiloice 

3i3isapo5> 
pea, witli 
points, 
varieties of 
to sail 
pose. All 
Hiave ibem, 
substiltile. 



The Esterbrook Stek Pbi Ca 

W«te.CMd«.N.X UJs t mUfm K fL^ 



gy^'^pmiWEm 






A Good DigflsttonLv^c 



If Toninflst 



..^l^lSSi'^JaSoJcc Sauce 

it ■timolates and promotes a healthy, Tigoitm^conditkm of theiUmiaeh. Tryltonoek Bold 
by all irrooexv. f^«6 Booklet on Reqttert. McILHEMNY'S TABASCO, KSW ISEBU. LA. 



VIOLETTESddCZAR 



THE iVER FASHIONABLE PERFUME OF 
ORfZA-L. LEGRANDCOra&d Friz Paris laOO^ 



LIFE 




B^gyptian 

Deities 




GO RIGHT TO CARRMGE HEfUBQUARtERS 

Write to-daj for onr illustrated catalogue (free) which describes our goods tmthfullj, 
explains our method and our guarantee and makes it safe, simple and easy for you to 
get carriages, harness and horse accessories direct from our factory at wholesale prices. 

THE COLUMBUS CARRIAGE w^ HARNESS COMPANY. 
Factory and General Ofllce, Columbiit, 0. Western Oflce A Oistributins House, 8t Louis, Mo. 

Write to DMiMt office. 




Bicycle 

S|P^ Playing 
if^\ Cards are 
world-wide 
favorites. 



When you play with "Bicycle" 
Playing Cards you hold good 
Cards. Sold by dealers. Popular 
price. 29 backs. Order by name. 
Design shown Is "Motorcycle." 
Copyrighted, 1900, by 

The U. S. Playing Card Co. 
Cincinnati, U. S. A. 

We will send 128-page Condensed Hovie 
for 10c. stamps, if addressed to Dept 61. 



NATURAL SHERRY^ WINE 

Now for fhe First Time 

Obtainable in tliis 

Country. 

OHE prodtict of the finest TineTard 
of Spain* A natural^ ancolored 
and tmsweetened wine» containing only 
the actual alcohol made hj its own fer- 
mentation* A delidoos tabk wine of 
aboot the same akohofic strength as 
clarets and may be drank quite as freely* 
It is the adopted luncheon wine of the 
Wine Merchants^ Luncheon Qub of Lon- 
don (the members of which are the best 
judges of wine in the world)* 

Price per atse of 12 bottles, $12.00 
SsmpU bottles, $S*25; express pjtid 

G. F. HEUBLEIN & BRO* 

Hartford New York London 



■'-^"^^^-^^p^rs 



fcaPIINAUD'S 



V^ vioLCT ml 





Colored Dress Goods. 

Additional Styles and Colorings 

in Scotch Homespuns, Zibelines 
and English Mohairs, 

now so much in vogue for 
Tailor-made Gowns. 



NEW YORK. 



Chicago's Theater Train— 12.10 Midnight— New York Cent 



LIFE 



^W? 



(9NTLMPO. 




A POLITICAL ODE IN BRIEF 
He thought he saw a False Alarm 

That told him to beware. 
He looked again and found it was 
A candidate for Mayor. 
"There ought to be some way," he said, 
"To harness all this air." 

— Chicago Tribune. 

ELECTRIC-LIGHTED TRAIN TO CALIFORNIA. 
The *'OTerland limited** via Cbloatco and North- 
Western, Union Pacific, and Southern Pacific Rall- 
way8, has electric reading lamps In every berth ; 
long distance telephone service, buffet-library cars 
(with barber and bath), compartment observation 
cars, and dining cars. All agents sell tickets via 
this route. 

At the request of the confirmed dyspeptic the 
operator was taking an X-ray photograph of the 
seat of his trouble. "This, I suppose." remarked 
the sufferer, with a ghastly attempt to be facetious, 
"is what might be called taking light exercise on 
an empty stomach." — Chicago Tribune, 

Taps — witness the pulse and thrill of naval and 
military life. See Old Point Comfort and Its en- 
virons. Historical and beautiful. Send to the 
Chamberlin for booklet. 

Mrs. OiLBiBT tells in her inimitable humorous 
way of a lifelong friend of hers, an elderly maiden 
who Is always sent for by nephews and nieces when 
an interesting event takes place in their house- 
holds. This maiden aunt had occasion to visit the 
dentist some little time ago. and was accompanied 
by Mrs. Gilbert. ' Gas was administered, and when 
the patient was emerging from under its influence 
she horrifled the dentist by crying excitedly: "Is 
it a boy or a girl?" — Neyo York Times. 

HOTEL VENDOME. BOSTON. 
All the attractions of hotel life, with the com- 
forts and privacy of home. 

An Oklahoma paper prints this story: She was 
from Boston, he from Oklahoma. "You have trav- 
eled a good deal in the West, have you not. Miss 
Beacon?" 

"Oh, yes, indeed — in California and Arizona, 
and even in New Mexico." 

"Did you ever see the Cherokee Strip?" 
There was a painful silence, but finally she 
looked over her glasses at him and said : "In the 
first place, sir, I deem your question exceedingly 
rude ; and, in the second, you might have been 
more refined in your language by asking me if I 
had ever seen the Cherokee disrobe." — Exchange. 

Don't show yonr bad taste, but insiat on having Coot's 
ImjHrial Extra J>ry Champagm of porest vintage always. 

The stories told in "the profession" of Mr. 
Brookfleld's scathing repartee are endless. On one 
occasion a young actor who had lately made a bit 
of a hit in a small part was regaling a few friends 
at great length upon the "splendid notices" he had 
received and the various merits of his performance. 
At last Brookfield quietly remarked: "But, my 
dear sir, you are not really at all good in the part. 
I havd never seen you do anything well, but in this 
particular you are simply naughty." 

"Indeed !" said the young man, bridling up. 
"I suppose so distinguished a critic as yourself 
would deny my being an actor at all !" 

"I certainly should," said Mr. Brookfield. 

"Then what would you call me?" asked the 
young man, a little recklessly. 

"Well," said Brookfield, with a sweet smile, "I 
should describe you as a pardonable error." 
fall Qazette. 



What 

PURITY 
Means 



7 "ills:!!' 



Purity req\iires pure woofer* 

We get it from six wells, driven down to rock. No purer 
water flows anywhere in the world, 

Purity^ necessitates pure air. 

All the air that touches Schlitz Beer, after the boiling pro- 
cess, passes first through an air filter. 

Pure beer must be filtered. 

Every drop of Schlitz beer is filtered by machinery 
through masses of white wood pulp. 

Pure beer contains no ^erms. 

Schlitz Beer is sterilized after it is bottled and sealed, 
by a process invented by M, Pasteur, of France, It 
requires one and one-half hours, 

That's how we double the necessary cost 
of our brewing. We do it to make purity 
certain — to make Schlitz Beer healthful. 

Will you drink common beer, and pay just 
as much for it, when Schlitz Beer can 
be had for the asking. 

Ask for the Brewery Bottling, 



WE CUIM 
THAT 



OLD CROW RYE 



IS BEST- 
BECAUSE 



H. B. KIRK 
& CO.. N. Y. 



It is sold straight It brings the distiller far more pnce 

than any other made in the United States. 
It is hand made, sour mash, and has the best reputation. 
Our Scotch Whiskies are true Glenlivets ; are sold straight 
The Souvenir is old. 
The Bonnie Brier Bush is very old. 
Compare them with any others. 



LIFE 



The Furrows 



The wear, the tear and the 
worry of life plough deeply. 
Physicians prescribe a tonic- 
al stimulant. 




o%^^ 



Hunter 

Baltimore 

Rye 



is their choice 
for strength, 
cheer and com- 
fort. 



For the physical 
needs of women, 
when rccom- 
mended, it is the 
purest tonical 
stimulant. 



S^ at aU nnt-clan cafen and by Jobbers. 
WM. LA.NAHAN A SON, BaltiinoTc, Md 



ro, Md. V 



*' Tbe moet wonderful medicine for all bron- 
chial affections."— Hon. Miis. Pbrrt, Cattle 
Gfi'y, Limerick, Ireland. 

BRONCHIAL 
TROCHES 



BROWN'S 

Fac-8ira!le Ji^ J /? >/ on every 
bif^natureof ^Om^jO /iU^$mu^^ box. 



Ul & RHEUMATISM 



DiiiiiCreatErig-lJsh Remedy 1 

BLAIR'S PILLsl 






.j,Effectiv«, 50c, tl$1, I 

P&irgoiSTS, OT sa4 ViUitm at, y. y.i 



A BIT OF SCOTLAND IN CANADA. 

At a point 146 miles north of Toronto on the 
Grand Truok Railway System Is reaolied one 
of the most magnificent dlf tricts in the High- 
lands of Ontario known as the Lake of Bays 
District. Tbe reflrlon comprises a series of con- 
n> cted lakes, over whiob Urge steamers are 
navigated, what frreatly adds to tbe Lsk*^ of 
Bays yalae as a health-giving and sportsman's 
r-sort is tbe unmatched purity of tbe air one 
breathes upon its heiirbts. The visitor forcrets 
Ills ills under its reviving influenf-e in 1^8s than 
a week, and sees life's problems in a smoother 
light, enjoyinfr the eood things in this life 
which Nature and Providence have prepared 
for him Its braoins morninfr breeze, which 
rivals the celebrated atmosphere of Pike's 
Peak, Col., imparts new lung power and fresh 
vitality. 

Handsome illnstrated publications sent free 
on application to 

PRANK P. DWVER, E. P. Agent. 

Grand Trunk Ralltoat| System, 
290 Broadwaii, New York. 



a 




99 



VELVET 



Most vel vets hre stretched. "Nonparfir'Vsl- 
vft It never ttrstchsd. Its pile is therefore 
faster than that of other velvets, and its 
wear jniaranteed. The dyers* name. J. A 
J. M. woRRALi^, on back of every yaid. 

Mrs. Kendal writes: "Your charmlnf 
* Nonpareil ' Velvet U Indeed soft, silky and 
sweet/* 

**Nonnnrell'> Velvet awarded rinit Gold Medals 
at Farla, London and Amaterdam Exbitrftlona. 
ALL COLORS AT FIRST-CLASS STORES. 




CopyHght 1902, by Ufe 

" All is Vanity ' 



PRICE, $3.00 

LIFE PUBLISHING CO. 

19 and 21 W. 31st Street NEW YORK 



REDUCED RATES TO NEW ORLEANS 

via Pennsylvania Railroad, account meeting 
National Manufacturers' Association. 
$37.50 for the round trip from New York. 
Tickets on sale April 11, 12 and 13, good 
going on date of sale, and good returning 
to reach New York not later than April 19. 
By depositing tickets with joint agent at 
New Orleans between April 12 and 19, and 
payment of fee of 50 cents, an extension of 
final return limit may be obtained to reach 
New York not later than April 30. Propor- 
tionate rates Irom other points. 



REDUCED RATES TO NEW ORLEANS 

via Pennsylvania Railroad, account meeting 
American Medical Association. $37.50 for 
the round trip from New York. Tickets on 
sale May 1, 2 and 3. Good going on date 
of sale, and good returning to reach New 
York not later than 10 days from date 
of sale. By depositing ticket with joint 
agent at New Orleans between May 1 and 
12, and payment of 50 cents, an extension 
of final return limit may be obtained to 
reach New York not later than May 30. 
Proportionate rates from other points. 



•• As good ©ls any other *•— 
is NOT to be tolerated— the 

Best Ale 

in the World 

is Evans' 



Brefw«d and Bottled by 

C. H. EVAN8 6c 80N8, 

Established 1786, Hadwrn, N. T. 



Rae's Lucca 

Olive Oil 

appreciated by connoisseurs 
for its 

Delicate Flavor 




(No rank smell nor taste, so frequent in 
some brands of Olive Oil.) 

Onaranteed Pure Oil of Olivet 
. . • only . . . 

S. RAE & CO. 

(Establuktd ISSG) 

LEGHORN. ITALY 



LARK'5 



NORWAY, 

Sweden, Russia 

The m OS t d f ' I i ^ 1 1 1 fill way \ r > visit these 

I intc'r^'SiiMgfounLrn'ftistal^trt'fi by our July 

I 2d Cruise of \"l duvs on Mie popular 

Lloyd eipresa stcamor " KAISERIN," 

I specially chartered for oiir party. 

RATES, 8276 AND UP. 

All necessary expenses included. Send for 

illustrated programme. Programmes ready for 

various Enropean tours ranging from |2fi0 

|*o«800. pn^H,^ Q^ CLARK, 

'ill Broadway, NEW YORIU 

' 8taf St,, B08T0N. 




Extra Dry, 



Du-mi-ny 

The highest type 
of French Champagne 

CX)DMAN A HALL CO., A«tB., BosTOV. Mass. 



LIFE 




A 5TANDARD OT EXCELLENCE UNiURPASJED 



MINERAL WATERS SQUIRTED 
OUT UNDER THE 15AR are not 
CARL II. SCHULTZ'S. All places that 
serve our Mineral Waters want to show 
their castomers that they are getting the 
best on the market, and on that account 
place the siphon in plain view. 

OBSERVE. 
CARL H. SCHULTZ. 

Telephone Conneotion. 48(M44 First Av.« N. T. 



i 



Richard Bennett 

TAILOR 

Riding, Driving, Golf $ultt, Unlffomt and LIvtritt 
Importtr off Fine Woolens 

Fine Shirks a Specialty 
206 and 208 Broadway, New Tork 

EVENINQ POST BUILDINQ 



Express Charges Prepaid to any Point 

One correspondent writes : • * I live way out here in Seattle^-do you really mean that you will 
pay ail the charges ? ' ' Wg do. Of course, we lose money on some orders by this offer, but we 
are safe on the average. We will also refund your money and pay the return charges if, after 



15 



thirty nights' free trial, you do not find 

The Ostermoor Patent $ 
Elastic Felt Mattress, 

equal in cleanliness, durability and comfort toany I50 hair mattress ever made. You can get your money 
back by return mail — " no questions asked." There will be no unpleasantness about it at all. About 
ten have come back in over four years. 

Our 73-Page Book <« The Test of Time '' Mailed Free 

to anyone who applies, whether you desire to buy a mattress or simply gratify an idle curiosity. 

a feet 6 Inches wide, as lbs., $ 8.35 ' 
3 feet wide, 30 lbs., - 10.00 

3 feet 6 Inches wide, 35 lbs,, 11.70 

4 feet wide, 40 lbs., - I3*35 
4 feet 6 Inches wide, 45 lbs. , 15.00 

Made in two parts 50 cents extra. 

These pricts include ex^res* charges . 

OSTERMOOR & CO., 114 Elizabeth St., New York. 



BBWARB I There is not a single 
store in the country that can sell our 
mattress ; almost every store now 
has an imitation so-called "felt" 
which is kept in stock to sell on our 
advertising. Our name ami guar- 
antee on every genuine tnattress. 
Can only be bought from us direct. 



"'Ve have cushioned as/xx) Churches. Send for our b6ok ' 
Canadian AddrMs, 801 St. James St., MontreaL 



Church Cushions.' 





:m -A. E=> i-i E -^^TO or 

NEAR CINCINNATI, OHIO. 
A Sanatorium establUbed in 1876 fbr tbe printt 
care and medical treatment of Droff and Alco- 
holic Addlctlone. Thousands havlngWlM 
elsewhere have been cured by na. Home Treai- 
ment If Desired* 

Address 
The D B.J.L.SrBrapi8 0o.,Dep.7T, Lpaiwbco. 

/One taste convinces 

KORNHSRISP 

Thatitis^lMisi 



Dedication St Louis Exposition 



REDUCED Rates via Pennsylvania Rail- 
road. $24.25 for the round trip from 
New York to St. Louis. Tidccts on sale 
April 26. 27, 28, 29, good going only on date 
sold and good to return until May 4* on being 
executed by the joint agent at St. Louis, lor 
which no fee will be required. Proportiofl- 
ate rates from other points. 



'5lia''Man 



— - To thos« who I 
p^ are lntere»««^ 
enough to lb wd 6 ctftt I 

^to cover maiirne. I will »«nd Jt^ I 
■"booklets and other matter, todudtagj 
•^mone other things, •'How Shall «V«nsyjr2 
^Succeed?'', "The Ill-Fortune of BrotlM^ B"^ 
•*Other People's Brains." "Who Should Stud;|f iWvej 
HslnK." "Why Advertising Should be Stodkd. wny | 
and How Advertising can be TauCht." . 

CIAILES AUSTIN BATES. 133 ■««MiSt.lleyV<gJ 




the new medicinal soap, is es- 
peciaUy vaiuable. While deanilDff 
tbe Bkln, it nourisbes the pom and 

Eromptly cures al/ eruptionM peculiar to baby- 
oud, even to ecsema. Qeatle yet elective. 

la endoreed by many pTominent pbyiiciaiis. It 
is a derivatiye of the faniooB sain ointment— 
Realnol. sold eyerywbere. Sample sent free. 
RMlnolChtmicaiCo.. Baltimore, Md., U.S.A. 







«AhCS ALL ROADS SMOOTH- ■- 



fiEO. N.PIERCE CO., »"?*M-^- 

Pierce Motorettes and Arrow Motor Cars 



/Qne taste convinces 
^way£ ready to eat 



THE CITY OF NEW YORK. 

DEPARTMENT OF TAXES AND ASSESSMENTS. 

MAIN OFFICE. BOROUGH OF MANHATTAN. 

NO. 280 BROADWAY. STEWART BUILJ>ING, 

January 12, 1903. 

NOTICE IS HEREBY GIVEN, AS REQUIRED 
by the Greater New York Charter, that the books 
called "The Annual Record of the Assessed Valuation 
of Real and Personal Estate of the Boroughs of Man- 
hattan. The Bronx, Brooklyn. Queens and Richmond, 
comprising The City of New York," will be open for 
examination and correction on the second Monday of 
January, and will remain open uotil the 
1ST DAY OF APRIL. 1803. 

During the time that the books are open to public 
inspection, application may be made by any person 
or corporation claiming to be aggrieved by the as- 
sessed valuation of real or personal estate to have the 
same corrected. 

In the Borough of Manhattan, at the main offlce of 
the Department of Taxes and Assessments, No. 280 
Broadway. 

In the Borough of The Bronx, at the office of the 
Department, Municipal Building. One Hundred and 
Seventy-seventh Street and Third Avenue. 

In the Borough of Brooklyn, at the office of the De- 
partment. Municipal Building. 

In the Borough of Qveens, at the office of the De- 
partment, Hackett Building, Jackson Avenue and 
Fifth Street, Long Island City. 

In the Borough of Richmond, at the office of the 
Department, Masonic Building, Stapleton. 

Corporations in all the Boroughs must make appli- 
cation only at the main office In the Borough of Man- 
hattan. 

Applications In relation to the assessed valuation of 
persona] estate must be made by the person assessed 
at the office of the Department In the Borough where 
such person resides, and in the rase of a non-resident 
carrying on business In The City of New York, at 
the office of the Department of the Borough where such 
place of business Is located between the hours of 10 
A. M. and 2 P. M.. except on Saturday, when all ap- 
plications must be made between 10 A. M. and 12 
noon. JAMES L. WELLS. President. 

WILLIAM S. COaSWEHLi.. 
GEOROE J. GILLESPIE. 
SAMUEL 6TRA8BOURGER. 
RUTTTS L. SCOTT, 
Commtesloners of Taxes and Assessments. 



LIFE 



,«i*y '^v..^ >:j^ 









WHITE ROCK— the selection of the most exclusive 



Buffalo 
Lithia Water 

The Best of Known T&ble Waters— A Veritable 

Antidote to the Pernicious Acids of Wines 

and Liquors— Its Use Neutralizes 

Excess of Nitrojfen in Rich Food. 

Dr. Roberts Bartholow. M. A.. LL. D.| Professor of Materia Medica and 
General Therapeutics in the Jefferson Medical College of Philadelphia, and author of 

'' Bartholow' s Materia Medica **p,, ^Lt_j SPRINGS of Virginia 

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ABBOTTSo^iciNAiANCOSTURABlTTERS 



LIFE 



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LIFE 




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An Easter Carol. 

SIX long weeks of lookiog solemn : 
I have scarcely seen you smile I 
Absent from the smart set column 
You have been a weary while. 
You have tried a turn at fasting 
I^st your pace be found too fast, — 
It seemed almost everlasting ; 
I am glad it ends at last. 

It was Matins in the morning 
^ With no hope of matinees ; 

Every hint of pleasure scorning, 
You were all for prayer and praise 

In the evening it was Vespers,^ 
Little time for love was there 

With my Lady Loveliness pers- 
istently engaged in prayer. 

But the end is here, and Easter 

Finds you smiling once again. 
With ft hat to make the priest stir 
When he thinks of other men 
Who can look upon the lily 

And its languors all as prose 
And, like me, grow somewhat silly 
For the raptures of the rose. 

So, Myrtilla, since the steeple 
Throbs no more with daily chimes, 



You can mingle with the people 

As you did in other times. 
Lent is gone*; but let me borrow 

Just one bit of happiness 
From your goodness, and to-morrow, 

When Love prays to you, say Yes. 

Felix Carmeni, 




A POET IS A PERSON WHO 

AT EASTER WRITES A SONNET, 

AND SENDS IT TO A LADY WHO 
WOULD RATHER OAVB A BONNET 



286 




LIFE 





" H'hiU there is Life there's Hope:^ 
VOL. XLl. APRIL 2, 1908. No. 10«6. 

19 Wbot Tbirty-Fibst St., New York. 



T^ 



Published erery Thursday. $.\C0 a year In ad 
▼auoe. Postage to foreign countries In the Postal 
UntoD, $l.(>i a year extra, cilngle current copies, 
10 cents. Back numbers, after three months from 
date of publication. 2i cents. 

No contribution will be returned unless 
accompanied by stamped and addressed 
envelope. 

The illustrations in Life are copyrighted, 
and are not to be reproduced. 

Prompt notification should be sent by sub- 
scribers of any change of address. 

"^HE experiences 
of the people 
of Water- 
'^bury, in Con- 
necticut, have 
attracted the 
attention of 
the g^eneral 
public for 
some months 
past. Water- 
bury is the 
place where 
they make the 
n o t o riouB 
Waterbury 
watches which it 
takes 80 long to 
wind up. They 
make other things there, too — clocks, 
hardware, pins, all sorts of brass ware, 
rings, machinery and the like. About 
forty -six thousand people live in the 
town, and the Ck>nnecticut Railway 
and Lighting Company runs their 
street car system. A while ago the 
employees of the street car company 
struck for more pay and other pallia- 
tives of toil. Very likely they de- 
served it. Street car companies are 
prone to water their stock and under- 
pay their employees. The Connecticut 
Company refused to grant the demands 
of its men, and proceeded to discharge 
them and hire others in their place. 
Then the trouble began. The labor 
unions were all in hearty sympathy 
with the strikers, and the Waterbury 
folks were notified not to ride on the 
Connecticut Company's cars on pain 
of being blacklisted and boycotted. 
Waterbury sympathised with the 
strikers and kept off the cars for a 




time, but there was so much violence — 
so much beating and maltreating of 
non-union men, so .much rioting and 
boycotting and general browbeating of 
all hands — that finally, after a police- 
man who was protecting a car had 
been murdered by strikers or their 
abettors, a large part of the Water- 
burians got tired of the strike and its 
oppressions, and came out openly and 
defied the strikers, and began riding on 
the cars again, boycott or no boycott. 

That is the situation at this writing. 
Waterbury is known as a city where 
life and property are no longer safe. 
The business of the town is checked, the 
city*s credit is impaired and its repu- 
tation damaged, but the labor union 
magnates say they will win the street 
railroad strike if they have to stop every 
wheel in every factory in the place. 




TT looks as though the strike indus- 
-^ try in Waterbury had been car- 
ried somewhat too far. The strikers 
have said, in effect, to the railroad : 
** If you don't yield to our demands we 
won't work for you, no one else shall 
work for you, your property will not 
be safe, and we will punish all your 
patrons, even though it causes them 
the gravest hardship not to ride on 
your cars." And they have said to 
their neighbors : *' We are in a fight. 
If you don't fight on our side we will 
fight you." And they have fought 
them, with blacklist and boycott, and 
however they might. Now, that is 
terrorism. All over the country ob- 
servers are speculating about the 
trades unions and the extent and limit- 
ations of their powers. The unions in 
Waterbury are showing what they can 
do, and lookers-on are watching to see 
how much bully -ragging the ununion- 
ized population of Waterbury can en- 
dure. 

It is known that the trades unions 
in many cases are found by their 
own members to be exceedingly op- 
pressive. There is never a consider- 
able strike which does not call out 
many workmen who are very unwill- 
ing to stop work. It is inevitable that 
if the unions become sufficiently tyran- 



nical the non-union men will organize 
for mutual protection against them. 
In Indianapolis this point has already 
been reached, as appears by the incor- 
poration of the Independent American 
Mechanics' Union, which aims " to de- 
feud its members against all attempts 
to abridge the right to work for such 
wages as shall be mutually satisfac- 
tory to the individual workman and 
his employer." This seems a pretty 
timely union. If organized labor can 
carry matters to such a pass as has 
been reached in Waterbury, the need 
of counter-organization is apparent. 




T ONDON Truth says that the Amer- 
ican woman has unquestionably 
been a success in Europe, but that if 
English women can maintain their 
"higher and more womanly ideals" 
and *' profit by the education and ex- 
perience of modem surroundings," 
they will hold their own in the long 
run. ** Their disinclination to * thrust 
themselves under the limelight ' will 
be appreciated," Truth thinks, ** when 
the men of the Old World cease to go 
for money to the New," and the Ameri- 
can woman's ways are no longer novel- 
ties. 

Heaven speed the day, but alas I 
when will the men of the Old World 
cease to go for money to the New? 
Never, until money is far scarcer here 
than it is now, or the tquest becomes 
vain for other reasons. Possibly as 
the American man becomes richer and 
less busy he will compete more suc- 
cessfully with his European rivals. 
Fashionable life here grows more 
luxurious, varied and coruscant all the 
time, and there is probably less induce- 
ment for a rich American girl to marry 
abroad than there was twenty years 
ago. We do not disparage the English 
ladies' attractions, nor grudge them 
their men, but as to our own girls, 
Traih must not judge them solely by 
those we export. Those are often 
lovely, but it is true that the limelight 
does not daunt them. When it comes 
to a consideration of womanly ideals, 
without disparagement to the Amer- 
ican ladies who bestow themselves on 
peers, we think we keep our best girls 
at home. 




HER FATHER'S DAUGHTER. 

' WHAT DID TOU DO WHBN WK KISSED TOUf " 
" I TURKXD TBB OTHCB CHBEK, PAPA/* 







Th4 DevU: bt osobob I kokb of thb oamv-lawi symB ibsmb to afplt to that boy. 




Whitmanically Put. 
DO not ordinarily swear ; 

I do not stiffen myself and 
think up doable distilled doable 
dashes wherewith to embellish 
my remarks ; 
I do not spoat forth larid elo- 
qnence npon ordinary occasions. 
Profanity has small place with me. 
Bat when I hear the rattle of the 
twenty-dollar-per-ton coal as the 
heavy-weight driver dumps the short- 
weight wagon before my door ; 

When I hear the meat bandit pre- 
senting his bill in the kitchen ; 

When I hear ihe grocery pirate ask- 
ing for his money at the hall door ; 

When I hear the gas-meter ring- 
ing its doleful melody in the base- 
mcTit ; 

When I hear my taxes and my rent 
and my water bill adding themselves 
up; 
When I hear and see all these and 

many other things 

And note that the wife of my bosom 
is reading an advertisement with a 
face suffused with joy ; 



When she tarns to me and murmurs 
something concerning an Easter bon- 
net 

Then do I search the bright lexicon 
of youthful memory for all the com- 
pound hyphenated cuss words I ever 
knew, 

And use them to express my opinion 
of the practice of reaching into the 
future for troubles 

That may be piled upon troubles 
that are trampling upon my heels from 
the past I 

Yea, then do I swear in a beautiful 
manner 1 



y^'-f^ 




THE LATEST book: 




TT7HATEVER one's opinion of Mrs. 
' ' Humphry Ward's past works may 
be, it would seem that she "has arrived" 
in her novel just completed and published, 
Lady Hose's Daughter, It is worse than 
useless to make prophecies. It is next to 
impossible to judge current literature other- 
wise than relatively and subject to the color 



contrasts of its surroundings, but oertainly 
in the company of their contemporaries 
Mrs. Ward's latest characters seem the 
creations of a master. (Harper and Broth- 
ers. $1.50.) 

Descending from the realms of literature 
to the plane of ephemeral fiction, we have a 
tale of some novelty and interest in TKe Tar 
Heel Baron, a story of North Carolina, by 
Mrs. Mabell Clarke Pelton. The scene is 
near Asheville, and both the characters and 
the story are entertaining. (J. B. Lippii* 
cott Company, Philadelphia. $1.50.) 

Mrs. Alice Hegan Rice and the public 
are both to be congratulated on the rather 
remarkable fact that the success of Mrs, 
Wigga of the Cabbage Patch has not given 
rise to a *' school." Mrs. Kice is thus 
enabled to glean the field she has alreody 
reaped with a sequel called Lovey Mary, 
and we have bt^en spared what might have 
been a veritable affliction. (The Century 
G)inpany. $1.00.) 

A very attractive volume for young read- 
ers is The Book of Romance, edited by An- 
drew Lang and illustrated by Henry Ford. 
It contains versions of the legends of the 
Round Table, of Roland, Diarmid, Robin 
Hood and others, all but one being done 




LIFE 




289 



by Mrs. Lang. (Lougmans, Green and 
Company. $1.60.) 

For some time English Poetry has been in 
rather a bad way, and there have even been 
those who despaired of the patient. One of 
the most encouraging bulletins we have had 
lately is a little volume called Captain 
Oraig, from the pen of Edwin Arlington 
Bobinson. The author is a bit inclined to 
the obscure, and in places he is deplorably 
harsh, but he is a poet, not a versifier, and 
he may go far: (Houghton, Mifflin and 
Company. $1.00.) 

The Woman WJio Toils, by Mrs. John 
Van Vorst and Marie Van Vorst, is the 



record of some months' experiences by the 
authors as factory hands in various States 
and cities. Whether they were inspired by 
altruistic purpose or merely in search of 
copy, their reports are interesting and give 
at least a superficial notion of existing con- 
ditions. (Doubleday, Page and Company. 
$1.50.) 

We tremble to note a volume upon JJoto 
to Gesture^ by Mr. Ott, president of a Chi- 
cago "School of Expression." If to the 
methods of the New York school of acting 
is to be added the Chicago school of ex- 
pression, what will the harvest be ? (Hinds 
and Noble. $1.10.) J. B. Kerfoot, 





SNAPSHOTS IN HADES. 
WeU'in/ormed Sinner {to Newcomer): that*8 old cebbbbus. 

BIOMALLT FOR A LITTLE FDK WITH THB8B MBN WHO KKFT 
ALLOWED THKX TO BUN OUT AT PA89BR9-BT. 



SATAN TUBH8 HIM OUT OCCA- 
VIOIOUS Does ON EABTH AND 



A Plea. 

~p\EAR GIRL, whose piercing glances are 
•^-^ What makes my song to start, 
I wonder what the chances are 

For my enraptured heart 
That nothing does but sing to you 

As 'twere a bird above. 
And ever comes to bring to you 

My love. 

All ardent and all amorous 

The joyous lyrics go, 
Like bees bewitched and clamorooB 

When first the blossoms blow : 
I don't think it improper to 

Make love as does the bee, 
So long as I've the opportn- 

Nity. 

I know of no vendetta, for 

How could a poet hate 
His music, muse and metaphor, 

His fancy and his fate 7 
I want your heart, and trust if I 

Have pierced the doubt that screens 
Desire, the end will justify 

The means. JVIix Ourmen. 

Life's Worst Newspaper 
Contest. 

ANNOUNCEMKNT OF PRIZE WINNER. 

THE prize of fifty dollars bas been awarded to 
Number Eight, published In Life of Febru- 
ary 26, the subject being The Botton Herald. 
This does not mean that The Botton Eerald is 
really the worst newspaper In the United States, 
but merely that, in the opinion of the Judges, 
the contribution, of which The Botton Herald was 
the subject, was entitied to the prize according 
to the conditions. 

TT'NRAGED READER: I have come 
-'-^ in to horsewhip the editor. 

Office Boy : You'll have to wait, 
sir; there are two others ahead of you. 



290 




LIFE 





Trying His Hand. 

^< -TTT H A T I claim ii 
VV this," said Dim- 
pkto LI / ' t hat i / 1 had complete 
( K^Lrju^e ot' this household, as 
50 u hiive, I would run it 
r>Ti husiness principles. 
MtTj know how to msm- 
lA^ethnae things so much 
I lx"tt*^r than women. They 
I aro trained in method. 
Instead of being 
on my feet all 
I day, which you 
are constantly 
complaining of, 
I would have 
several hours to my- 
self. It's business, that's all. and women 
don*t know how." 

** Why not try it for a day or so? " said 
Mrs. Dimpleton. '*I will visit Aunt Jane 
to-morrow night, and you can stay at home 
and manage in your own way." 

"Done! " exclaimed Dimpleton. "I've 
long wanted to give you a lesson in prac- 
tical affairs. I'll send word to the office that 
I won't be down, and you can get off as early 
in the morning as possible. All I want is 
the formula for making the baby's milk, and 
the keys." 

Mrs. Dimpleton was off at seven o'clock 
the next morning, and Dimpleton, the mo- 
ment the door cfosed, smiled a triumphant 
smile and proceeded to his study. 

" This is the greatest snap I ever had," he 
chuckled to himself. " A day of quiet, un- 
interrupted reading. But in the meantime, 
I will make out my schedule. I haven't 
pondered this matter oveV my wife's shoul- 
der all these years for nothing." 
He sat down and wrote the following : 

NOTICE. 
This schedule goes into effect until further 
orders. In case of other instructions, I may 
be seen in my study from 10 to 11 daily. 
R. G. DIMPLETON. 
6:30— All rise. 

6:45 — Cook will make 6re. Nurse will 
dress baby. Waitress dust halls and library. 
7:00— Waitress will set table. Cook will 
prepare breakfast. Nurse will feed baby. 
7:30— Breakfast. 

8:00 — Cook and waitress will breakfast. 
8:15 — Nurse will breakfast while cook 
and waitress mind baby. They can al- 
ternate every other time. 

8:30 — Nurse will take baby out and 
wheel him one mile. 
9:00— Nurse will wash dishes. 
10:00— Nurse will feed baby. Waitress will 
make all beds. 

1:00 (p. M.)— Nurse will fe^ baby. Wait- 
ress set table. Cook prepare luncheon. 



1:30 — Luncheon. 

2:00— Nurse will put baby to sleep. 

2:15 — Nurse will make baby's milk. 
Formula: Two tablespoon fuls of cream to 
half pint water and half pint milk. 

4:00 — Nurse will wake up baby (very 
gently) and feed him. 

6:00— Waitress will set table. Cook will 
prepare dinner. Nurse bathe baby, feed him 
and put him to sleep. 

6:30— Dinner. 
11:00— Lights out. 

" There," said Dimpleton, as he rang the 
bell and handed the card to the waitress. 
** There, Marie, put this in a conspicuous 
place in the back hall, and tell the other 
girls to read it carefully." 

Marie held the rather imposing looking 
card, with its bold characters, gingerly be- 
tween her fingers, and retired slowly. 

"Very well, sir," she said as she backed 
out. 

" Now," said Dimpleton, lighting a cigar, 
" for a few hours* solid comfort." He had 
Just had a good breakfast and was at peace 
with all the world. In five minutes he. was 
absorbed in the stirring incidents of the 
front page of his newspaper. 

Suddenly there obtruded upon his con- 
sciousness a low wail that grew louder and 
louder and still louder. Then a succession 
of short, sharp, agonizing cries. Hesprangto 
his feet and bounded upstairs to the nursery. 

The cook, with the baby in her arms, was 
doing her best to pacify that recalcitrant 
youth. 

" Where's the nurse? " said Dimpleton. 

"Sure, sur, she's eatin' her breakfast." 

Dimpleton remembered the schedule, with 
a certain sense of pleasure that it was being 
carried out. even though the result was paore 
discordant than he had thought of. In 
the meantime the nurse, attracted by the 
commotion, came running up the stairs. 

"Maggie," said Dimpleton to that func- 
tionary, as the baby quieted down in her 
arms, " I never heard him do that before at 
this hour. What's the matter ? " 

" Mrs. Dimpleton always held him, sir, 
while I was eating my breakfast," said 
Maggie. 

" Well, you go back and finish," said 
Dimpleton, "and I'll amuse him myself." 

And for fifteen minutes he played he was 
ahorse. 

Then he went back to his study. He had 
been there about ten minutes when there 
was a timid knock. It was the cook. 

* * Excuse me, sur, " she said, "but what are 
we to haye for lunch, an' for dinner? " 

"What do you usually have to-day?" 
asked Dimpleton, with slight chagrin. 
" You're the cook, aren't you ?" 



"Sure, sur, the missus ginerally goes to 
the market in the momin'." 

"Of course," said Dimpleton, vaguely. 
Here a whole department, and the most im- 
portant one of all, had entirely slipped his 
mind. He must go to market. Otherwise 
he would get poor things to eat. He knew 
that — and yet — well, this morning he was 
too busy. He would for once trust to the 
butcher. 

"All right, Bridget," he said, "111 fix 
that" 

He stepped to the telephone, and in obe- 
dience to the suggestions from the other 
end, in five minutes had ordered enough to 
supply a fair-sised regiment. But it was 
great fun. " I'll have enough to eat, any- 
way," he said to himself. 

Then he settled back again for three min- 
utes more. 

There was another timid knock at the 
door. 

" What thedev " half exclaimed Dim- 
pleton. 

" Please, sir," said the voice of Marie, 
" the man to,fix the water-pipes^'' 

Dimpleton and the man vwent downstairs 
into the cellar. He grop^ his way along a 
passage where the cook had. told.hi^i to go, 
opened the door and stood face to face with 
an unknown woman. . -. '[ 

" Who are you?" said Dimpleton. 

The woman wiped ^er brow. 

" I'm tthe laundress, sur," said she. 

Here was another possibility for disci- 
pline. '< ' * . ' 

" Well, well," said the master of the house 
toJiiroself,* ''I ^lust revise that schedule." 

He showed the man about the pipes, or 
rather the man persuaded him that a new set 
was. necessary, and once more he went back 
to bis study. 

But muc^ to his surprise, it was now 
Ipncheon time— and nothing done. 

Dimpleton sat down to a profusion of 
food. Never before, it seemed to him, had 
he seen so much of it together at one time. 

" Marie," he said to the waitress, " what is 
the meaning of all this?" 

" I don't know, sir," said Marie, "I'll a>k 
the cook, sir. The cook says, sir," she ex- 
plained, as she reentered the room, "that 
the things came, and there's twice as much 
for dinner, and, and " 

She lowered her voice to a whisper 

"She had to cook 'em to keep 'em, as 
there was no room in the refrigerator, sir.'* 

Dimpleton sighed. " I'll know better 
next time," he said to himself. " No living 
human being could strike it right the first 
day." 

After luncheon he started back to his 
study to finish that from page before the af- 
temoon paper was delivered. 




^^UPB(J_^ 




29J 




LOOES BAD FOR TBI BILL. 



There again yy&B that wail. Then he re- 
membered that he must either bear it or 
play h orse again ; He sprang to the nursery, 
mad as a hornet. 

This time Marie, it being her turn accord- 
ing to the schedule, was doing her best. 

"I'll teach him," he exclaimed. **It'8 
evident that this kid has been spoiled. I'll 
teach him I Now, sir, you sit there !" 

The baby, however, was quick to perceive 
the difference between his father's morning 
and afternoon mood. He yelled louder than 
ever. 

Then Dimpleton yielded. He became a 
horse again for fifteen minutes. 

Once more back in his study, he picked 
up his paper. But he could not read. His 
mind was in a tumult. What infernal in- 
terruption would happen next ? He thought 
of his business. How he longed for it I He 
would go — he would steal away, if only for 
an hour. 



Just then the door opened quietly. 

A woman faced him. He could not be- 
lieve his senses. 

*' Didn't you go? " he gasped at last. 

'*0f course not," said Mrs. Dimpleton. 
** I went shopping. You don't suppose I 
would leave you in charge for more than a 
few hours at a time, do you 7 How did you 
get on ? *' 

Dimpleton was silent for a moment. Then 
he went over and put his arm around his 
wife, while he pressed into her hand a new 
hundred-dollar bill. 

" Here, my dear," he said, ** take this as 
a slight token of my esteem and admiration. 
I wouldn't have your job for a million dol- 
lars I" Tom Masaon, 

•* "prOW beantifnlly Sadie^s cheeks 
are colored. It must be arti- 
ficial." 
"Notatall. That'sastraight flush." 




▲ LIGHT DIST 



292 




^Z5^ LIFE 





EASTER VERSES. 




An Easter Offering. 

O LILY I 
By poetasters doomed to go 
With illy, 

Chilly, 
StiUy. 
And wbatiio silly 

Rhymes beside. 
Or nilly-willy 

Forced to blow 
At Eastertide, 
I wot your spotless lot is not 

A bed of roses. Lily! 
Marguerite Merington. 

A Reflection. 

WHEN Easter comes to strew my 
path 
With sunshine and with flowers. 
And all the Joys of budding Spring 

Bedeck the passing hours, 
My daughters get new hats and gowns, 

My wife gets frocks and frills, 
My sons get brand-new Easter suits, 
While I— I get the bills. 

J. B, K. 

Easter on t6e Avenue. 

"THVERY tribute to transgression— 
-■— ^ We assume — has now been paid ; 
Shall we join in the procession ? 
Shall we march with the parade ? 
All the glamours, all the graces, 

They may here be seen on view ; 
Mobile, — automobile faces I 
Easter on the Avenue ! 

Gowns of gay and tender tinting ; 

Hats that are a very dream ; 
Laces flowing, jewels glinting, 

Lips aglow and eyes agleam. 
Silk and kid and patent leather ; 

Vanity ! — you have the clue ! 
O the wondrous, wondrous weather! 

Easter on the Avenue I 



Laughter, like a prismy bubble. 

Floats adown the vernal air ; 
Where is now the wraith of trouble ? 

And the ghost of sorrow, where? 
Fled is moody melancholy ; 

Rules the rose and not the rue ; 
Tx), it is the reign of folly ! — 

Easter on the Avenue I 

Clinton Scollard. 

The Easter Catechism. 

'VT'OU ask me " what she wore," and wait, 
-*- And marvel that I hesitate, 
Since right beside her in the pew 
I sat for full an hour or two ! 





"And what did she have on ? " you ask. 
As tho* it were an easy task. 
But I will answer like a man. 
And give such details as I can. 

Now, first of all, you say, the hat — 
I surely can reply to tfuit ! 
V faith, there isn't much to tell, 
Save it became her wondrous well. 

The color? Oh, a pinkish-pink, 
To match her dimpled cheeks, I think. 
What elser In truth, I didn't note ! 
I reached the ribbon at her throat — 

But as I slyly gazed, you see. 
She turned her head and smiled at me ! 
She smiled, you see — as said before. 
And I forgot to notice taaore. 

Edwin L. Sabin, 

Her Easter Hat. 

T SING MyrUlla's Easter hat ; 
-^ And, not to be satirical, 
I call a pretty thing like that 

A millinery miracle ; 
How much it cost, I do not know, — 

That matters not a whit to me 
So long as it is oomme Ufaut,— 

Style's climax and epitome. 

Of ribbons wrought, and, woven wire, 

And with an ostrich feather in ; — 
What more could any girl desire 

To celebrate the weather in ! 
It is a captivating crown. — 

A queen, you know, must have a new 
Sensation when she greets the Town 

At Easter on the Avenue ! 

So, watching as Myrtilla goes 

In all her vernal royalty. 
My heart remembers what it owes 

And pledges love and loyalty : 
A bonnet's apotheosis I 

And if I sing its wonder it 
Is just because Td like to kiss 

The rosy face that's under it ! 

jPUix Carmen, 




LIFE 




293 







A 




.^im«H«aii MagnaWi Daughter: don^t tou hatb xlsotbic liobts amo ontx pillabs and diamonds in 

HKAYNN f 

" NO, XT DBAB. ONLY BUNLIOHT AND PLAIN GOLD 8TBXST0.** 
" MY I WHAT A OOXE-DOWN I " 



A Twentieth Century Docu- 
ment. 

Extract from the Diary of a Metropolitan Street 
MaUway Conductor. 
\ OKDAT NIQHT : A blamed fool, who wanted 
me to stop the car, In hlB excitement rang 
np twelve teres on me to-day. Well, I came out 
even on the run, anyway. Washed my hands this 
morning for the first Ume In six months. Qneer 
sensation. 



M^ 



TuxsDAT : Had a row with a woman at Twenty- 
third Street this morning. She didn't like it be- 
cause I called her a "slob.*' Some people don't 
know when they are well treated. Said she was 
going to report me. Wonder If she did. Well, 
ru never know, anyway. 

Widnbsdat: I made one whole trip to-day 
without being blockaded once. Such a thing 
never happened before, and probably never will 

Friday: I was called into the Presidents 



office to-day for orders. A spot- 
ter said I wasn't lively enough. 

** Remember.** said the Presi- 
dent, "that you must not only 
say ' Step np In front * but mAke 
*em do It. Push *em along your- 
self. What do wo pay you for, 
anyway r" 

Well, he won't have to com- 
plain of me again. 

Satttrday : I stopped the car 
tcmay for a woman to get on. It 
happened In tbls way: I was 
ringing np fares, there being a 
spotter aboard, and touched the 
wrong cord. The motorman was 
wild, and I had to apologize to him 
later. 

Sunday: Last night I woke np 
out of a sound sleep and found I 
had punched the top off my bed, 
and had pushed all the furniture 
In the room out of place. 
Dreamed 1 was on duty. 

Easter Inquiries. 

Tj^ORTY days of virtue, 
-^ Sweetheart, you have 

spent: 
Come, you little flirt, you, 
Doesn't Conscience hurt you ? 
Let your heart relent. 

Here is Easter Sunday : 
Have you told your sins ? 

Think. To-morrow's Mon- 
day, 

And there's only one day 
£re the fun begins. 

Shall yon still continue 

Flirting as before? 
Come now, let me win you 1 
Kissing is a sin you 

Cannot quite abhor. 

Loye in song or sonnet 

Is the only bee 
In your Easter bonnet : 
Take my word upon it. 

Does he sing of me 7 

TpURTS are the filibns- 
-^ ters of love. 




* CHANOB FOR 



294 




LIFE 








Ballade of the Illustrious. 



COME people rise to lofty station — 
The lucky favorites of Fame — 

As. for example, Carrie Nation, 
Who makes a cyclone seem quite tame : 
Or "Mother" Eddy, with her "claim" 

Of rodents in her upper story, 
Who puts the gp-een-goods men to shame; 

But do you envy them their glory ? 



There's Hobson, Prince of Osculation ; 

There's noble General Smith, the same 
Whose " water cure " investigation 

Has given him a deathless name; 

There's Kitchener, who likes to maim 
And burn and stab, and make things gory; 

To be illustrious they aim, 
But do you envy them their glory? 




i)LIFE 




-i«*> 




^Jl X>^/ V"^ 



295 





There's Willie Hearst, whose elevation 

To Congress feeds Ambition's flame 
His Presidential aspiration 

Burns in each fibre of his frame ; 

And David Hill, who lately came 
To grief, despite his oratory ; 

And Piatt, Past Master of the Game.— 
Say, do you envy them their glory ? 



Friend, you and I are not to blame 

If Fame regards them conamore; 
The world may greet theni with acclaim, 

But do you envy them their glory? 

Frank Roe Batchelder, 





THI WBDDINO FBAAT— RICB. 

To a Qirl Angelic. 

NO penance do, dear heart ; I vow 
By all celestial hopes above me, 
'Tifi I should kneel ; lo — 'shamed I bow 
Who have not traits to make you love me. 

TpLSIE, IN CHURCH, TO 
-■-^ HER MOTHER : Oh, 
mamma, I can think of so 
many things to do that are 
nicer than this. 

" T T is interesting that 
-*- Bishop Smart should 
marry so much money.** 

"Oh, well, it*8 an old 
church doctrine, don*t you 
know, the laying hands on 
consecrated material. ' ' 



^HE last lesson we learn is 
to pardon ovrselves. 



/ 





* XT I TBOUOBT TOU COULD LIVl DOWN TOITR BBPUTATIOX AS ▲ * BAD HAH,' I TBIMK I COULD MABBT TOU/» 
"why I ORSAT SCOTT I TOU SHOULD HAVB KHOWX Ml WHIN I LIVED W NIW TORK I" 



'RAISINe THS DKVTL." 




LIFE 




297 




His Duty. 

* ' f K SOW now that I love you.'* 
-1- M illington Mugwump was no fool. 
His penetrating eyes seemed 
to look quite through the 
queenly young woman who 
sat opposite to him. 

"The fact that I have 
waited, before makjng this 
declaration, until I was as- 
sured of certain character- 
i»Ui !i (iiuift not seem too calculating on my 
pflrt/' W went on, "but I realize, that 
where so much is at stake for us both, it is necessary that care 
should be taken. When, therefore, I first took you out to luncheon 
and observed that with scarcely any hesitation at all, you im- 
mediately selected the most expensive things on the bill of fare. I 
felt drawn toward you at once." 

Millicent Spenderly smiled back at him. 

"1 was afraid,*' she said, "that you might think me extrava- 
gant." 

" You do not understand me yet," her lover replied, impetuously. 
" I noticed almost immediately that nothing was too good for you. 
and I said to myself, ' Ilere is the one woman in the world for me.* 
When you insisted upon my buying the theatre seats of speculators, 
when you told me that you had overdrawn your allowance, when 
you said that your dressmaker's and tailor's bill was something 
that your father didn't dream of, what with me had been simple 
admiration, rapidly deepened into the most fervent desire." 
He leaned slightly forward and took her hand in his. 
** My darling," he said, " will you be my wife? To me you are 
the loveliest and most expensive thing in the world." 

Millicent blushed deeply. She thought with her extravagant 
tastes that the idea of anyone wanting to marry her was a strange 
thing — something she had not dreamed of. 

*' It never occurred to me," she said frankly, "that you would 
care to run the risk of taking me for a wife. You are now a free, 
careless bachelor, with no troubles. But with me, think of what 
you will have to bear." 
But Millington Mugwump did not falter. 

" I know it." he said, "know that what you say is too true. 
But it is my duty and I mast not shrink from it. I am too patri- 
otic to refuse." 

" Duty ! Patriotic ! " she repeated. What have these things to 
do with it?" 

" Simply this," replied her sublime suitor ; " I am a New Yorker 
by birth and an American by inheritance, and I feel that it is no 
more than right for me to lead, in common with others, the 
ordinary life of an American husband." T. M, 

Obeying Orders. 

/^NE of Mrs. De Style's fads is to distribute Easter lilies 
^-^ among all her charities, and do it herself. A day or 
two before Easter, therefore, she swept out of the florist's 
to her carriage, followed by her footman with both arms 
full of lilies. Either the wind or a no less mischievous 
small boy had closed the carriage door during her absence, 
and, upon seeing this, Mrs. De Style commanded, with her 
usual imperiousness : 

** James, open the door for me instantly." 

Immediately there was a tremendous crash behind her 
that made Mrs. De Style turn with a startled jump, and to 



her amazement she beheld the pavement covered with 
broken flower-pots, earth, and Easter lilies, with James 
calmly picking his way through the debris towards the 
carriage door. 

" James, what does this mean? " she demanded, sharply. 
** Did you drop those lilies purposely ? " 

"Yes, ma'am; certainly, ma'am," responded James, 
placidly holding the door open. ** Haven't you always 
told me, ma'am, to drop everything and do what you told 
me to at once, ma'am ? " Alex, Ricketts, 

THE MISTAKE OF A MOTHER. 




** WKIX. WELL I THIS 18 LCCK. IT*S MT SBTTIMG TIMB, AND HBRB 
ARK HOXB FIMK NEW EGOS. 



^i-ijm 



'"-'■I^^OK^ 




" I GUESS THIS IS GOING TO BE ▲ SDOCISS. I FEEL SOMETHIMO 
MOVING. 




Z/' 






** OH, MT CUIDBBN, MT CHILDBBN I ** 




OVFrtf *f. rnr, h, u/4 ^hiitktnv {jo 



WHY SHE DION'' 

THE MAN BKHIKD THE PAPEB VESTD 




GET THE PLACE. 

ED THK OPINION THAT 8HK MIGHT DO. 



300 




LIFE 





TnrT~n^^--r^„ 








The Circus and More Musical Comedy. 

■'- ^'^^~ ^*Cr^ surer sign of 

-"^^ approaching 
spring is vouchsafed 
to New Yorkers 
than the arrival 
of the circus at 
^ Madison Square 
Garden. It is as 
reliable a portent 
as the rapid 
lengthening of the 
< i ; lys or the return of the 
rijbins to Central Park. 
Ftir a few years sub- 
Btkutes have taken the 
filate of the only, original 
Bi^miiiu\ which has been 
ji:3linbi^Li]ig li>rt!]gii parU Willi the AiiM'rii unrhess of its immensity. 
Its sojourn abroad, however, seems to have given ** the greatest 
show on earth " ren#:wed youth and vigor. It would be impossible 
to describe its many, myriad, megatherian attractions without 
dropping into the literary style of the distinguished author of its 
advertisements. Suffice it to say that any child who wishes to 
take its parents, grandparents or other adult relatives to the circus 
this year can do so with perfect confidence that they will not be 
disappointed either in the perplexing simultaneous performances 
in the arena with its three rings or in the reinforced army of freaks 
and wonders. The generations of circus-goers who have come 
into existence since Bamum's went abroad will find that the tradi- 
tions they have heard concerning it were in no wise exaggerated. 
• • • 

EW YORK has just had the unusual 
experience of getting its musical 
i^omedy second-hand. The airs of "The 
Prince of Pilsen " were familiar before it 
made its appearance at the Broadway, 
the piece having experienced previous 
long and thorough tests in such dog- 
towns as Chicago and Boston. Per- 
haps those places have not had such 
overdoses of musical comedy as this 
unfortunate metropolis, so they were 
more enthusiastic over it than we are 
likely to become. This statement 
doesn't necessarily mean that '' The 
Prince of Pilsen " is at all bad of its 
kind, but the kind has monopolized 
oar theatres to an extent where the public 
is ready to welcome any other kind of 
show ; in fact, even *' Uncle Tom's Cabin " 
noK Tn 0HOBU8 OP or *'Ten Nights in a Barroom" might 



N' 




find appreciative audiences. The blame for this state of affaira, of 
course, rests between an easy public and the Theatrical Syndicate, 
which has neither the brains to discover good material nor the 
artistic knowledge to give it proper presentation. 

'* The Prince of Pilsen " emphasizes one thing — we have either 
got to have fewer musical comedies or more comedians. It must 
have been a hopeless search which resulted in giving the leading 
comic r6Ie in the piece to Mr. John K. Ransome. He is disiinctly 
un-funny, and it may be taken for granted that he would not have 
been cast for the part by so astute a manager as Mr. Henry W. 
Savage, if better material had been available. The only other 
member of the cast who standi out with special prominence is 
Helen Bertram, whose excellent technique, both in singing and 
acting, is refreshing by comparison with the crudeness which 
infests the comic opera stage. Also there are pretty girls in 
abundance, the Jewish type too much in evidence, perhaps, but as 
a rule shapely and nimble, and well rehearsed. The mounting of 
the piece in costume and scenery is unusually gorgeous and tasteful. 
'' The Prince of Pilsen " in neither book nor score is as good as 
its stable-mate, '^ The Sultan of Sulu." It has a number of 
fetching airs, the " Stein Song," rendered by a male chorus, being 
the most pretentious. With fewer musical comedies in town ** The 
Prince of Pilsen " would doubtless become very popular. As it 
is, it is sufficiently above the average to hold its own and success- 
fully co|)e with its many competitors. 

A pleasant feature of the first performance in New York of 
"The Prince of Pilsen*' was Mr. Luders's evident enjoyment of 
his own music. He is the composer, and conducted the orchestra. 
A solitary hand-clap from any one in the house meant an imme- 
diate encore. This was pleasant for Mr. Luders, but tough on the 
audience. MetaUfe, 

LIFE'S CONFIDENTIAL GUIDE TO THE THEATRES. 
Academy of MuHc.—*'' The Suburlian." Notice later. 
i;f/a«a).—" The Darling of the Qods.'' Tragedy o( Japanese life. The 
most notable prodaction of the year. 

Bijou.— UMXit Oahlll in "Nancy Brown.'* Conunonplace musical 
comedy. 
Broadway.— ** The Prince of Pilsen.** Musical comedy. See above. 
Co^no.— '*The Chinese Honeymoon.** Musical comedy of the usual 
type. 

CVi/«Hon.— Charles Hawtrey in •« A Message from Mars.** Revival of 
last season's clever satire. 
Daly's,—'* The Jewel of Asia.** Musical comedy. Pretty bad. 
6rar(/«n.— "Everyman.** Artistic and impressive performance. Very 
well worth seeing. 

(?<irrt<;it.— Annie Russell in "Mice and Men.** Clever little play, well 
acted. 

Herald Square.— Once George in • 'Pretty 
Peggy." Noilce later. 

Knickerbocker.— "Mr. Bluebeard.*' Ma- 
steal comedy. Pretentions in presentation, 
but poor in quality. 

Madiwn Sqiiare.—EAAe de Wolfe in 
** Cynthia.** Amusing but not imposing 
comedy. 

if{^/<#/k.— "The Wizard of Oz.** Elab- 
orate spectacle. Amusing and melodious. 
ManhaUau.-'^ThQ Earl of Pawtucltet.*» 
Really humorous play, well done. 

/Viw««.— "The Frisky Mrs. Johnson.*' 
Clyde Fitch society play of average interest. 
Saroy.—*''T\iB Girl with the Green Eyes.** 
By Clyde Fitch. Fairly interesting. 

Mcloria.—'' Resurrection.'* ImpressiYe 
stage version of Tolstoi's story. 

Wallack's.— ''The Sultan of Sulu.*» Mu- 
sical comedy of the better sort 

Weber and il«/<^*«.— Burlesque and vaade* 
ville. If you haven't got any money for the 
ticket speculator, you needn't come 'round. ** thb nuMOi OP FILBBI.** 





LIFE 





301 




i'M .\ew uergyman : or ooursb tou will comb to sunoat-schuol, xt uttlb mam. 
Bobbie: what inducements are tou oFrEBiNGf 




A/f R. AND MRS. 
->J- GETTE THAYER 
HOBBS are still at their 
country place, Gold- 
' acres, on the Sound. 
Their son Richard ties 
his own cravats. 
Mrs. Hardy Snubber 
looked out of her drawing-room window on Madison Ave- 
nue last Tuesday, about three o'clock in the afternoon, 
and saw Mrs. Bulliphat Inkum going by. They bowed. 

The opera season has been a great success. People who 
prefer other operas to those of Wagner have been made to 
realize their guilt. Mrs. Groundfloor Jones and her 
daughter Flippie (|6,000,000 in her own right) both agree 
that Wagner is ** just too sweetly symbolic for anything." 
Speaking of Wagner, Billy de Splay says that now he 
likes **inotif8'* better than fancy waistcoats. The de 
Splays are second cousins of the Endlyss Delias. 

Mrs. Innittor Dedd gives a dinner next Monday. The 
roses alone will cost sixteen thousand dollars. The shad 
will be stuffed with emeralds. 



In other words, death will presently be confined to the 
very poor, who are too proud to take advantage of the free 
clinics. 



^pHE worst thing about the vain man is his sociability. 



" Pallida Mors i£quo (nit) Pulsat Pede.*' 
** nr IFE is short, art is long and experience is fallacious," 

-^ exclaimed Hippocrates of Cos, voicing the diffi- 
dence that has ever been the character of medical practice. 

Thus, doctors merely suspect that salt and water injected 
into the veins will revive the moribund and indefinitely 
prolong life. 

But happily the newspapers know it. 







"bots, doh't tou bmow it's wicked to fight? now, if I 

TOU, I'd kiss AMD MAKE UP.'* 

**SAT. WOT DO TOU8 TIKK DI8 18— A WOMAM'S CLUB?" 




FRENCH HISTORY. 

THE HURUKNDSR TO THE REPUBLICAN ARX8 WAS IMMEDIATELY roLLOWEI) BY THE TERROR. 



Street Sayings. 

TT'S a long Maiden Lane that has no 
-^ turning. 

Many a poor devil has gone to the 
Wall street. 

It's a cold day when some folks get 
left ; but it's Bleecker for others. 

In Union Square there is strength. 

One good Forty-second street de- 
serves another. 

Let us have Gramercy Park before 
meat. 

Some people have a hard Park Row 
to hoe. 

Give me Liberty street, or Death T 

Life may be one Grand street song. 



Worth street makes the man, and 
want of it the fellow. 

Every Murray Hill has a vale. 

Vesey street is not for everybody. 

The Dey street is cast, 

But Broad street is the way that 
leadeth to destruction. 

Do not cast Pearl street before 
swine. 

Diddle, diddle dumpling, my son 
John street. 

All is not Gold street that glisters. 
Tom Masson. 

** T^ID McMerger inherit his money?" 
-*-^ " Indirectly. He inherited the 
ability to get the best of others." 



iEsop Up To Date, 

The Fox akd the Grapes. 

A HUNGRY Fox saw some Tempt- 
"^ ing Grapes hanging high up on 
an Arbor. He made many Attempts 
to Reach them, but all in Vain. 

Tired out by his Failures, he grum- 
bled to himself: ** Nasty, sour 
Things, I know you are ; not at all Fit 
for Eating." 

A Friend who was Passing said 
Tauntingly : 

** How do you Know the Grapes are 
Sour?" 

"Watson," replied the Fox, "you 
should know Enough of my Methods 




^LIFE 




303 




by this Time to answer that Question your- 
B<*lf. Bat since you Inquire, I will 
Hhow yuu how Easily a Mind like 
'Miue can Reach Conclusions. Ob- 
serve these Footprints. They 
are 3iade by a Man who is 
lamed by Gout; who is rich, 
and who is married to his 
Third Wife, a Beautiful woman 
of Slight Force of Character.** 
"How can you Possibly 
Ituow all that? " exclaimed his 
P^^ Friend. 

fX' **It is so Easy," said the 

fc * ^^ Fox, wearily, as he lighted 

• ^ his Pipe. ** You can see the 

Man is Lame, because 
the Footprints are Un- 
even. Also, beside 
them are the footprints 
of a servant who assist- 
ed the man to Walk. 
This proves him a Rich 
man, and his wealth 
proves his Grout. He 
must be married to a 
Third Wife, for a First 
would have had all the 
servants Herself, and a 
Second would have 
been Tagging after the 
Man. His wife must 
be Beautiful or he 
would not have mar- 
ried her. She has 
slight Force of Charac- 
ter, or she Too would 
have monopolized all 
the Servants' Services. 
Now the Footsteps do 
not go near the Grapes, 
although the Fruit is within 
Easy Reach of a man's arm. 
This, therefore, proves them 
sour, because I deduce that the 
Man with the Gout would take 
no Acid into his System.'* 

Moral : An Ounce of Deduc- 
Titju is worth a Pound of Fact. 
Carolyn Wclh, 




*' don't you THIMK that six club J IS A GOOD M ANT POR A MABBIBD MAH LIKB TOUB- 
»BU TO BELONG TO f '* 

** BUT, MT DARLING, TOU MUST RBXEMBEU THAT NOT XVBBY XARBIBD MAN HAS A 
TTOMAK LIKE TOU FOB A WIFE." 



FirH Chick : ehb, too, is lucky. 
Second Chick : how so f 

"WHY, isn't 8HB BEINO BOBN WITH AN 
EASTBR HAT ON HEB HEAD t *' 



LIFE 




NO BACILLUS HUGGIBUS. 
Tbey tell us microbes lurk upon 

The pouting ruby lips; 
That fierce bacilli lurk, to grab 

With terrifying grips 
The man who dares to take a kiss 

Without a trembling shrug — 
But let's be thankful they have found 

No microbes in a bug. 

The germs of every known complaint 

Are in the air we breathe — 
Each honeyed nothing we may hear 

With direst ills may seethe ; 
Who knows? The coyest glance may hold 

A bad microbic thug ! 
It's good to know they have not found 

A microbe in the hug. 

We will not lay us down and die. 

Nor petulantly sneeze. 
Because of any illnesses 

Contracted in a squeeze. 
So bring the bobsled and the girls, 

And tuck yourselves in snug — 
One Joy of life remains unscathed — 

No microbes in a hug ! 

— Chicago Tribune. 

"Hays you ever heard the story about the man 
with the torn coat?" asked Senator Depew recently. 
after shaking hands with an old Albany friend. 

"Is this one of your own make?" queried the 
friend. 

"The story, or the coat?" retorted the Senator. 
as he cleared his throat. "Well, it was this way: 
A man and his wife went to a dinner dance. They 
arrived so late that the dressing-rooms were empty. 
The wife noticed a rip in her husband's coat. She 
therefore led him into the ladies' dressing-room, 
saying she could fix the tear with a pin. On exam- 
ination, however, she found she could not mend the 
rent unless he took off the garment. The husband 
took It off. 

"Just then footsteps were heard, and women's 
voices. The husband, in a fright, looked around 
for an avenue of' escape, but saw only one other 
door besides the one by which they had entered. 
The wife was still more terror-stricken, and, seiz- 
ing her husband, she precipitately shoved him 
through the second doorway, and turned the lock 
behind him. 

"At the same Instant two women came into the 
dressing-room and discovered the wife standing 







there with a man's coat In her hands. She at- 
tempted to explain, but her words were drowned by 
a r>eries of ferocious poundings on the door through 
which her husband had disappeared. 

" 'Open the door ! Open the door !' he shouted. 

"'I can't!' shrieked the poor wife. 'There are 
two women here !' 

"'Hang the women!' shouted the poor wretch 
again. Tm out here in the ballroom !' " — New 
York Tribune. 

"I SEE the ships," said the Eavesdropper, as he 
stole round the world to me, "on a dozen Hides of 
the world. I hear them fighting with the sea." 

"And what do you see on the ships?" I said. 

"Figures of men and women — thousands of fig- 
ures of men and women." 

"And what are they doing?" 

"They are walking fiercely," he said, "some of 
them — walking fiercely up and down the decks be- 
fore the sea." 

"Why?" said I. 

"Because they cannot stand still and look at It. 
Others are reading in chairs because they cannot 
sit still and look at it." 

"And there are some." said the Eavesdropper, 
"with roofs of boards above their heads (to protect 
them from Wonder) down In the hold — splaying 
cards." 

There was silence. 

"What are you seeing now?" I said. 

"Trains," he said, "a globe full of trains. They 
are on a dozen sides of it. Tbey are clinging to the 
crusts of it — mountains — rivers — prairies — some in 
the light and some in the dark — creeping through 
space." 

"And what do you see In the trains?" 

"Miles of faces." 

"And the faces?" 

"They are pushing on the trains." 

"What are you seeing now?" I said. 

"Cities," he said — "streets of cities — miles of 
streets of cities." 

"And what do you see in the streets of cities?" 

"Men, women, and smoke." 

"And what are the men and women doing?" 

"Hurrying." said he. 

"Where?" said I. 

"God knows." — From '/The Loat Art. of Read- 
ing/* by Gerald Stanley Lee. 



.OJR 



When Roscoe Conkling first began the practkt ■ 
of law in New York, he lost a most importsni mar- | 
der case on which he had worked very bard, not 
only for the fee, which he needed badly, bm for i 
reputation which he had to make. Despite hi& cf. 
forts, his client was hanged. Later, when be prv- 
sented his bill to the man's family, they refused to 
pay It, on the ground that it was excessive. He 
took the bill to Charles O'Conor. the great criminal 
lawyer, asking him to pass Judgment as to th» 
equity of his charges. O'Conor scanned tbe ac- 
count very closely, and then, turning to Conkling. 
very gravely remarked : "Well, Conkling. taking 
Into consideration tbe enormous amount of energr 
and time you have devoted to this case, tbe chargn 
are reasonable : but see here, Conkling. don't tob 
think the man could have been banged (or Im 
money than that?" — Argonaut. 

Recentlt a Winchester (Va.) girl came to 
Washington to visit the parents of her flanc«. 
Upon her return home her old colored mammj 
came to see her, and said to her. "Honey, wbens 
you goln' to git married?" The engagement bid 
not been announced, so tbe young woman replied: 
"Why, I don't know, auntie ; I am not even en- 
gaged. What do you think of that?" Tbe oM 
colored woman said : "Laws-a-me, but that snt- 
tanly am a pity: but. Miss Nancy, ther do sar 
that ole maids is the happiest critters tbere 1$. 
once they quits strugglln'." — Harper* b Jfaporiw. 

"My brother Jakey's got a good job." 

"Where's he working?" 

"Down to the electric light plant." 

"Picking currents off the wires?" 

"Yes. How did you guess? He says h« like* 

the job ; it's such light work." — Cincinnati C(m- 

mercial-Tribune. 

Rbab Admiral Frank Wildes, who died ^^ 
cently. used to be fond of telling of a great sUrt 
that a Boston clergyman once gave his congrep- 
tion. 

"I was bom In Boston." Admiral Wildes wonld 
say, "and in my boyhood attended church there. 
Well, at church one Sunday morning there was, ii 
seems, a couple to be married after tbe '^^^^ 
The minister made the announcement in tbi^ ^- 

" 'The parties that are to be joined In m ' 
mony will present themselves Immediately after < 
singing of Hymn J^o. 245 — "Mistaken Soob 
Dream of Heaven.'"" — New York Tribune. 



LiFK la for sale by all Newsdealers In Great Britain. The International Kews 
Company. Bream's Building. Chancery Lane, London, E. C, England, Agimtb. 



Established 1823. 

WILSON 
WHISKEY 

That's All! 



WILSON DISTILLINQ CO., 
Baltimore. Md. 



On the Wing 

Reputation travels like the wind. 
Over the Continent 

Hunter 
Whiskey 

has founded a new type, a new 
name for what is a pure, old, 
mellow product. 

Wm. Lamaiian & Sow, Baltimore, Md. 




ROYAL Ll LEGRAND ORIZA-PERFUIWERY (Oraaa Friz Faris 1900) 




Oldsmobile 

**lhe Besi Thinif on WTiee/**," 

The real p^eautr« t*f ^utocnobiling is fotind in the bn^^r sunny spfingtiuie whtii 
t wittCDai» ber d^veiteei with an ever chai>ging puaorama of beaut y« 
Tfie linipliriiy of the Dliismob:]^ enables its drivers to appreciate Irt (He full eat ex- 
tent all th* deiliElits of a spnnis outing -tftere It no fompJtrjt nrrusigemifnt oi uTnuifit'^ibte 
i&ech^inii kii devices— n» i^inelfl levrr lo start mitli, and a seniittve, yet ab-Hjlmnriy certain 
foot contr*->| leave ^^J^fftMimg U tVut^^ 6ui ihr Road,** 'H^e Odimohile ch«>ertunv inounts 
Ibe hjghest bill, nev«f i ires on tlie longKst drives and i^ readr for a j{)uri4ii«, eithiUrating 
run in the upen country or a i-c^date pace *tn the crowded sitrect* 

Price S650.00 

Thete arc OldlsmtJbUe ^ffenolefl fti every Siute ftpd In all tbe laf|;er cftJea. 
WHte oa for an tHustrAted book or oiill on your l<Kitl ui:ent. 

^ Olds Motor Works, 




Twtjuty horeopowcf iwfl DaRRAC^. with ta^ anil tor>iif?iU] ( 



NolaelesfM-^intrTBiailc InlTripalkib— cnnQplet* UimtUe tt3toln>]^rtiirt* tt%mi ti* «*L K, 9^ I4M4 

Wwtlr luipnrUitlonB inwire iKleat Btylpa »ftd lidiaedliitf; aellTcrr- 

84fc our l>u(ciDi>M t^wUvi-rr wH^>n&. CtrriiUrt free. 

AMERICAN DARRACQ AUTOMOBILE CO, 

OoQtroned by F. A. LA »OOHK 00 MP A ITT 

feiitmii A^FAitf for the Clevetiind Roadjti^ 852-f»64 Hudson StT«et 

Bnmeh. 117 Wert 3tttit Wnot NEW YORK 

ClilCfttfO Mranchr fi09-AQ4 Wabash Avenue 



Thi Otdy oth6 tAiit attract won 

T^ HAYNES-ARREIRSON 

WftA Evety Grtd«r»nce Contest MeU in America* i-very Conte»t or Race Ever 

enteral]. More kecords Than Any Other Hade in the United StaU», and wi* 

the Only Gaaoiene Car that Ran ttie Conlr^t from New York to Beit on 

■nd Hack WithQut Repalra or Adfustmenta OF ANY KIND 




SURREY , 12 H.P., 11800, TOP, A WD FRONT riEADLlOnT EXTRA 

17 Rccordi amS Awards all Earned by Stock Macblnca. The Machine you Buy 

!■ the one that Mak«a the ReCfirdS 



^p mtAwr mimter In t}*e ^orld eat* «A' 
•j^tiLial anit rf*rn;jit«J ofDelalcoTnp«tiLiv 






tfiltfjMhir kp 



Gft»t ^'lir C»ta]Cfff»ie an J the *' LUtI* IWtak.'^ 
Surrey, SI SOO- Phaeton, $]500-R[inab«Ut« £1200— Tonneau^ $2400 



If AYKi:S.APP£RSON CO., Kokomo, Ind. 

Dtuneli t*'''«TT MtlQJS5 inriiiNUkh Ati»„ Cblca^, Eartffti HpTifw-eniiUvaBr BrwoltlTn Autr^mo- 
Irtte O-^* ligjftti-*} *^tt..r ~ - 



urcM'kiya, 



U. S. A, 



. V. ><rw Vort Icif'^rl'au to tha ftanouniTtd. 



Naili^nai 



The Ideal PHYSICIAN'S Automobile 



Made la RUN 
ALL thi Time, 

Under AM Con- 
ditions of Roads 
and Weather. 



THE ACME 

of Slmplicit^r 
and Eleganct 

Unequaled 

lOr DurabJtIty 
and Comfort, 




GEO. N. PIERCE CO.»?r^»a"T- 

Fierce Cyctes^^Arrow Motor Care 

GATALOGDES FSEE OH APPUCATIOn. 



Llhf 




DeaciipilTo Okteloinie on Applioatton. C«n be aeen at the foK 

lowing Reposltortea, where we aim show a fall line of 

our celebrated rehldes and harneH. 

STCDRBA&BR BR08. MFO. CO. 

Stadebaker Broc Oa, of New Toiic, Broadwaj and Serenth 
ATe., cor. Mth St., New Tork Cftj: StadebakerBroai iUg. Oo., 
378 to 888 Wabaah Are., Chicago, DL 

Bimncb Hovses mnd Selling Avents 

In All Other PriBCipalCitles. 

ract4Ny and General Offices, South Bend, Ind. 

FIBST4U88 161X18 DBIUB H TIUIITORT lOT ALRIADT0OYIU9 



Gas-oline motive poiver Staris from the 
scat. Speed up to 30 mi le^ an hour. Sha^t 
drive. Siniplc to operate and U iim^ttess. 
Ko chains, * 

too tniles on n. single che.rg«. 
SEND FOR CATALOGUE, 

CREST MFG. COMPANY, 

CAMBRIDGE, MASS, 

Ai;r[icii"i ii3 Sew York And oth*:r l*j»^*e cltka. 




An Automobile for Family Use. 



Our Beautiful 



THOMAS 



Model, No* 18 



is the cue tDiLQeau macMne th^t c^n 
be latl^factofllT' «p<rated and cared for 
without the employment of an cjtpert 
chauffeur. For Beatttj of Outlioe aad 
Finish, QnietncM »f Moyeiaeat, Faie of 
Control, ftxtd Freedom from Mecbajilcal 
CoaipllcatJana, the THOMAS k yet to be 
ei^omled* Addrest for CAtal4>ffuer 



^ E. R. THOMAS MOTOR CO., 1227 Niagara Street. Baffalo, N.Y. 




1*9 per cent 1)/ a Camera's Foiiti 
i* m th& If Hi 

Htmi pHtt oiiJy In a camt^m Ji 
for th«' i^uti^it^ of ibw jitHyrp, 

Si. \n.tUrt |iL{ tor*.' f vtii by uccide^Ui. 

The Goerc Leni 

m „HM I hy 1 ln^ IrjulkijLE Tihrno^rmphentttfuUBT 
jiiKJ [irjtft>fjii)ihal, in I'wry rtjiiturj. 
At >inir ^Imli^r* or JlrvcL Wllte Ui 

C.r GOfR/»Roc«13«91£ UakbaSqMnlT. 



EYERTONEJlSi 



WM 




ODOMCTOt 



TfiLLS THE DlSTA^iCE EXACat 

MOfiT L'^dlwiuAiiu'at'tufvr* waiiU>l«tMf»*«*'«* 
" * ^\'«'U . r oa om Pt .Hf #^11.1 n 1 1 1 «n juo r Teii M iff »■ 
Ttnjiiri't 11 rri-ii, Tli*^ nj^kiT »lio flit 4 rtrtltrtfliii** 

^1 sit! !■ i n nil * htf*l P a«,^ fer » **■ ir^ii Jinff t taut lav^ IV ew 

<HJ tn ► PI ( ^I 11 1«, h , in«e fPt eyi "If, ] n fi rrterlH* • •** fl1»*^ 




IJi,-* wU.i ln<lB« th- FimsiHiRirB Jf 'f,^i,: 
1 h i;- 1 1 f ar rpt" d I *l* r an 1 bn r H r. Jj 1 In ■ n' '-«""'' ' 

i^.o.itHJkirn cfttakjjrtiw tr^i H'^""i ,;:«,/■ « 

^j W iKTdi^Mjn. . 

NATIONAL PHONOttliif tt CO,* 0«NM;i, 
San Fn. nel*co* «i lUflWt i*- 



• Lire • 




Aatom c b ite s 



have been in successful service since 1895. The latest models 
are a result of eight years steady and consistent attention to 
development and improvement in the largest and best equipped 
automobile factory in the world, and are unequaled for effi- 
ciency, durability, perfection of details and elegance of finish. 

COLllBU 24-0. P. 6AS0LENE TOURINe CAR 



Mark XLI. 




Everywhere admitted to be the most perfect gasolene car yet devised. 
Seats six persons. New and exclusive features throughout. AH parts of 
engine and transmission gear instantly accessible. All operating parts 
interchangeable. Igniting plugs and valves removable without tools. 
Speeds four to forty-five miles per hour. Minimum of vibration and noise. 
Finest body work and furnishings ever seen on an automobile. 

Trice^ - ' ^5^000 

COLDMBU UeHT EEaRIC RUNABOUT 

Mtkrk XXXVin. 




One of the sensations of the New York and Chicago Shows. Most con- 
venient, fastest and handsomest Electric Runabout in the 1903 rnajket. 
Battery and motor beneath the floor, leaving entire body space available 
for luggage. Low center of gravity gives great steadiness and splendid 
. riding qualities. Two brakes. Five speeds up to fifteen miles per hour. 
Fofty miles on one charge of battery. 

Trice, - ^900 

ELECTRIC BROUGHAMS, HANSOMS, COUPES, 
CABRIOLETS, TONNEAUS. SURREYS. VICTORIAS, 
RUNABOUTS, SPECIAL SERVICE WAGONS, 
BUSSES, WAGONETTES, DELIVERY WAGONS, 
TRUCKS, PATROL WAGONS, AMBULANCES ^ ^ 

Cateloffiie and full i«foriiiatlo« will be teat on reqoest 

Electric Vehicle Company 

HARTFORD. CONN. 

NEW YORK SALESROOMS, West 39th St., opp. Metropolitan Opera House 
BOSTON, 43 Columbus Ave. CHICAQO, 1491 Michigaii Ave. 




<*OH, I BIO TOUR PARDON, SIR ! I MISTOOK THIS FOR ▲ TRKR-TRUKK !*' 




ii cipitdl in iuclfactd ha* a definite money vilue 
(,0 thoM dependent upon it. Life Itirfunnce in 

THE PRUDENTIAL 

protecti Ihit cnpT«l »nU renders that valtic 

permanent and certiiin. 

Pvticku Al AfU. I ID Mt Ovlh Sen (J. Amnunlt. IfaO^fHW t4» Iff. 

THE PRUDEIVTrAL INSURANCE CO. OF \MKRlCA 



PvtIClMJ 

r ^ 




l^ir JCr 



(SNTEMPO. 




Sfe^ 



Bill: What would you call this attack on the 
poolrooms? 

Jiix : Race prejudice, I guess. — Tonkcra Statea- 
man. 

Two young ladles were arrested the first of the 
week for choking another young lady and using 
profane language.)— Caney (Kan.) Chronicle. 

CALIFORNIA IN LESS THAN THREE DAYS 
VIA Chicago and North-Western, Union Pacific, and 
Southern Pacific Railways from Chicago. The elec- 
tric-lighted "Overland Limited" provides the best 
of everything. Diversity of routes ; finest scenery. 
Compartment observation cars, buffet-library cars 
(with barber and bath) ; dining cars. All agents 
sell tickets via this route. 

"Was his speech good?" 

"Not very. It wasn't clever enough to cause 
anybody to suspect him of plagiarism." — Waah- 
ington Star. 

FtBST Divinity Student: What is the subject 
for discussion at the Debating Society to-night? 

Second Ditto: The Influence of Creased Trous- 
ers on the Decadence of Prayer. — Unidentified. 

HOTEL VENDOME, BOSTON. 
The ideal hotel of America for permanent and 
transient guests. 

"In Hawaii," volunteered the Wise Guy, "many 
people live in houses made of grass." 

"How convenient/' remarked the Cheerful Idiot. 
"When they want fresh breakfast food all they 
have to do Is to take a bite out of the wall." — 
Cincinnati Commerciai'Trilnine. 

Good health la real wealth— Abbott's, the Original 
Angostura Bitters la a veritable fortune to the weak. 

"The day isn't far distant when the man in 
the flying machine will look down upon the auto- 
mobillst/' said the prophetic soul. 

"And let us hope, too," replied the weary 
pedestrian, "that he'll fall down on him." — Phila- 
delphia Press, 

In this age, when so many adulterated goods are 
oObred, you want Ooak^s Imperial Extra Jh-y Champagne. 
It la pure. 

Noah and Shem, taking their flrst walk from the 
stranded ark. came upon a beautiful little pool on 
Mount Ararat, in which some gorgeous trout were 
disporting themselves. 

"What a splendid place to flsh !" said Shem, de- 
lightedly. 

"Bully !" acquiesced Noah, who had lived on salt 
cod till he was tired of it; "but, dash it all, we've 
only got two worms!" — Sporting Times. 

Dig money in matches. We manafactnre the latest 
machinery and wUl famish you a manager or teach any pur- 
chaser the bosineas. F. W. Mubpht A Bbo., 1118 Ashland 
Block, Chicago, 111. 

V "I want half a pound of water crackers," said 
Mrs. Newcome. 

"All-fired sorry, ma'am," replied the country 
storekeeper, "but I ain't got but two dozen of 'em 
in the place." 

"Well, I'll take them." 

"Jest wait ten, twenty minutes. Hi Peters an* 
Josh Slocum has been usin' 'em fur checkers an' 
they're playin' the decidln' game now." — Phila- 
delphia Press. 







A bottle of ddl clous, sparkling Londonderry Lithia 

Water when seen on a club, hotel or home table, 
proclaims the good taste ol the user. 




h 





Muster thinks Im a dandy • 
at mixing cocktailsV 

(OCKTAILS 

voir ^^^ **** ** 

1 \J \J }ust as well 



Pour over lun\ps of ice. strain &nd serve 

SEVEH KIKDS BEWARE OF IMITATIONS 

G. F. HEVBLEIN ®. BRO. 

HArtTFOftD NEW YOKK LONDOH 



'^st Line to Chicago and the West— NEW YORK CENTRAL. 



•LIFE- 



ImportatloBs for 1902 of 

Go H. MUMM & COo's 
Extra Dry 

were 407 ^ 304 bottles 
more than any other brands 

The Famous 1898 Vjiitage of Mumni's Extra 

Dry, now arriving, is destined to make 

a still more emphatic increase. 




STALL S BOOKS 

A Han witli a Message 

Millions of p«ople always await 
the man wiih a real messaee. 
Dr. Stall has found it so. His 
books are already circulated in 
every land. 

275th thousand in English. 

They are being translated into 
several languages in Europe 
DR. STALL *°^ ^^^ ^^ Asia. 

THE SELF AND SEX SERIES 

has the unqualified endorsement of 
Dr. Joseph Cook Bishop Vincent 

§ev. C. M. Sheldon Anthony Comstock 

ev. P. B. Meyer ** Pansy" 

Dr. Theodore L. Cuyler Frances E. Wlllard 
Dr. Prancis E. Clark Lady H. Somerset 
Bminant physicians and hundreds of others. 

4 BOOKS TO MEN. By Sylvanus Stall, D.D. 
What a Young Boy Ought to Know. 
What a Young Man Ought to Know. 

What a Young Husband Ought to Know. 
What a Man op 45 Ought to Know. 

4 BOOKS TO WOMEN. By Mrs. Mary Wood- 
Allen. M.D.. and Mrs. Emma F. A. Drake, M.D. 
What a Young Girl Ought to Know. 
What a Young Woman Ought to Know. 
What a Young Wifb Ought to Know. 
What a Woman of 45 Ought to Know. 
Sf ^r copy, post/ree. Stud J or tail* of content*, 

VIr Publlshlns: Co. ]i^^^^ f SSlS^pTS 




Scotch 
Whiskies 

JOHN HOPKINS & CO. 

OLASGOW AND LONDON 
AND 

'*Navy Liqueur" 



'•The best Scotch 
whiskies, the 
favorites of 



Booklet of all our wines 
sent upon request. 



C. H. ARNOLD & CO. 

AGENTS FOR U. S. 

27 South William St. 

NEW YORK 



• i • 



In PoHte Society 

IT IS THE CUSTOM TO TAKE 
A GLASS OP 

Chartreuse 



-GREEN OR YELU>W- 



AS A FITTING FINALE TO A 
GOOD DINNER. THIS CELE- 
BRATED LIQUEUR HAS 
BEEN MADE FOR 300 
YEARS BY THE MONKS OP 
LA GRANDE CHARTREUSE, 
GRENOBLE, FRANCE. 
IT IS DAINTY, DELICIOUS, 
DIGESTIVE. 



Wine BferchaatSf Oroeen, Hotels, Calls. 
0., 4S Broadway, New YorkrN. Y., 



Hitjer&Co.,^3 ».»^w.,, ..«.. .».», 
Sole AgenU lor United States. 



THE CITY OF NEW YORK. 
DEPARTMENT OF TAXES AND ASSESSMENTS, 
MAIN OFFICE, BOROUGH OF MANHATTAN, 
NO. 280 BROADWAY, STEWART BUILDING, 
January 12, 1903. 
NOTICE IS HEREBY GIVEN, AS REQUIRED 
by the Greater New York Charter, that the books 
called "The Annual Record of the Asseaeed Valuation 
of Real and Personal Estate of the Boroughs of Man- 
hattan, The Bronx, Brooklyn. Queens and Richmond, 
comprising The City of New York," will be open for 
examination and correction on the second Monday of 
January, and will remain open nottl the 
1ST DAY OF APRIL, 1903. 
During the time that the books are open to public 
Inspection, application may be made by any person 
or corporation claiming to be aggrieved by the as- 
sessed valuation of real or personal estate to have the 
same corrected. 

In the Borough of Manhattan, at the main office of 
the Department of Taxes and Assessments. No. 280 
Broadway. 

In the Borough of The Bronx, at the office of the 
Department, Municipal Building, One Hundred and 
Seventy-seventh Street and Third Avenue. 

In the Borough of Brooklyn, at the office of the De- 
partment, Municipal Building. 

In the Borough of Qv*»ens, at the office of the De- 
partment. Hackett Building, Jackson Avenue and 
Fifth Street. Long Island City. 

In the Borough of Richmond, at the office of the 
Department, Masonic Build'ng, Stapleton. 

Corporations in all the Boroughs must make appli- 
cation only at the main office in the Borough of Man- 
hattan. 

Applicatlons'^in relation to the assessed valuation of 
pergonal estate must be made by the person assessed 
at the office of the I>epartment In the Borough where 
such person resides, and In the case of a non-resident 
carrying on business in The City of New York, at 
the office of the Department of the Borough where such 
place of business is located between the hours of 10 
A. M. and 2 P. M., except on Saturday, whon all ap- 
made between 10 A. M. and 12 
JAMES L. WELLS. President, 
WILLIAM S. COGSWELL. 
GEORGE J. GILLESPIE. 
SAMUEL STRASBOURGER, 
RUFUS L. SCOTT. 
Commtesloners of Taxes and Assessments. 



plications must be 
noon. 



THE ONLY AUC THAT IS 
INDIVIDUAL AND DISTINCTIVE 

Evans 

Ale 

It exemplifies Ale -brewing 
as a finished science— Any- 
one can see it 



Accept no substitute 
use only the genuine 

MURRAY A 
LANMAN'S 
FLORIDA 
WATER 

For the Handkerchief, 
Dressing-table and Bath. 




«<At the SIGN of the BULL DOG** 



Ws maks 

Pure 

Habana 

Segars 

In the honest 
old fashion. 

Sold by 

Independent 

Dealers. 



Baron DeKalb- 



Henry Irving 



For 60c. we will send you a handsome 
picture cf KIKQ LUD, channpion Bull 
Doer of the world, framed in weathered 
oak kenneL 

J^Kn W. MerriaLiTi & Co. 

The ICovcroft Sega^r Shop, which 
is "At the Sign of the Bull Dog" 

139 Maiden Lane, New York 



©LO eROW RYE 



A 
STRAIGHT. 



WHISKEY 



H. B. KIRK & CO., 
SOLE BOTTLERS, NEW YOR' 



Llhb- 



From The Four-Track News. 



"OUR LEADING CARDS 



ff 



No. 1— THE JOKER 

** It BeoLts Everything " 



ke:vv'york 
Antral 




The New York Central's 

Empire State Express 

Most Panovt Train ia tlie World 



Rons everv bosineM day, New York to Buffalo, 440 miles in 405 minntefl ; and for 216 of the 440 milea it 
rons at a speed exceed in^r eixtv miles an hoar. 

Nearly three hundred million pictures of this train were issued by the United States Post -Office Depart- 
ment on ine two-ceni stamp of the Pan-AmericAn series. 

The Pour-Track News, an Illustrated monthly maf^asine of travel and education— 100 or more pages, 
every one of which is of human interest. Mailed free to any address m North America for 50 cents a year ; 
foreign countries, $1.00. Single copies 5 cents. Sold by news dealers. 

George H. Daniels, Publisher, Grand Central Station, New York. 
5eod a two-ceot stamp for a f lffty-two> pago llliistratad catalogue of the '* Poor-Track Sarlos." 



iM ^A. F Xj E "\^r o o r) 

NEAR OINCINNATI, OHIO. 

A Sanatorlnm establlEhed in 1876 for the private 
care aod medical treatment of Droa: and Alco- 
holic Addirtion*. Tbonsands having failed 
elsewhere hayie been cured by as. Home Treat- 
ment if Deaired* 

AddreflB 

Thb Db. J. L. Stbphkns Co., Dep. 77, Lbbanon. O. 



*' Where smiling spring its ear /test visit pays ** 

OLD POINT COMFORT, VIRQINIA 

HOTEL 
CHAMBERLIN 

The mo»t magnificently situated and comfortably 
famished hotel on the Atlantic Coast. Unique in Cai- 
sine. Service, and Appointments. 

Vtry Rtatoaablt Rattt. Vary Suptrlor Accomfflodatloat 

GEOBGB F, ADAlVIfl, lllffr. 

New York Boofciag Office, 289 Foartb Aveaae. Secoad 

Floor. Taiopboae I749-I8tli 

^^Write for Booklet. New management 1908 
Golf the Year 'Round 



Dyspepsia 

and othmr 4fonk€ich iroubU^ 

quickly relieved and in most cases 
surely cured by the use of 

Silycozone 

This scientific germicide is ahso^ 
tutety harfnte^s^: it subdues the 
inflammation of the mucous mem- 
brane of the stomach, and by re- 
moving the cause, effects a cure. 
Used and recommended by leading phy- 
sicians. Take no substitute and see that 
each bottle bears my signature. Trial size, 
•l.OO, at druggists or by mail, from 




DtpU 9., 60 Prince 8t. New York. 

Send for BwMd. 




AutomobUs House 



SommsrCoMq^e 



Portable Houses 

are praetkal, accoratAly built, eadly tymmvottsd, mttsblt 
for wuj climata aod esn be errcted in a day. 

The ** t'alt HTOteai" of constmcUon orevaCitbrMcb. 
oat and ewry pan* • Is Interchn ngeable. No nails raqufatd- 
no carpenters. AUiostmctfonsarefamlsacd. 

No Experience Needed to Erect 

Tbess boons are perfect fa coiiiitni<>lion ; vrleJ mm^ 
water preet; admlrabtr adapted to mesi ererr 
rsqalremMit i < mameutaJ and rsssonable In prieei 

(mr superb faculties and autonstio machinery cmUs « 
to dellrer tbes^ ) ono«8, ready to erect on preaJses, si local 
price of mat..! ial alone. 

SUMMER COnAGCS-AUTOMOHU NOUSES 

CWLOREIfS PUYHOUSES - HUNTErS CAMS 

Wrtte at once for catalogue and prirea. SUteyovraNdi 
in detail and we will Inmiah you wlih full I 



MERSII0W4M0«UYC0..a001roadway.8atiaaw.Mkk 



ENNEN'S 

BORATKD TAL.OUM 

TOILET 
POWDER 

for After Shaving. 

laalat that your barber use« MeaaeB's 
Toilet Powder after he ahaves you. It a 
AbUm^Io, and will paKTIST any tit the 
uany skin discaaet often contracted. 
A potiilve relief for PBICKLI HIiT. 
CHAri^U and srilBrBII. and all afflictions of the skin. R*> 
moveik all odor of perspiration. Set a— ee*a— the nrigiaaL 
Sold erery where, or mailetl for 9S cents. Sample Frte. 
«KRHARD BnC»lVK.¥ CO.. Wewark, JT. J. 




"Big Four" 



The 



World's Fair Route 



From tlM 



Leading Cities of 

Ohio, Indiana 
and Illinois 



To 



St. Louis 



Write for Folders. 

Warreo J. Lynch, W. P. Deppe, 

Qen'l Pass. A«t Aas't Ocn'l P. !• 

CINCINNATI, omO. 



LIFE 



ADMIRAL 



A GOOD COLLAR 

tQdP«i»]fTTi the nanio taiti^ hnve a touch t>f (ti?- 
tinct Fly tn I muBt bf irnftouful In Umv up-UMUt*- 
Imnuft frrtiki»li. Tim.* A^Jniirqu! ihown iith>To la 
the voTnu^t simp& in n wUm eullftr„ om* itt the 
muni' ix^puUr ftlyles of oqr Holitiot WrRiicl. 
Boltl i'T|4rTwheT¥ 2 far K i:ent& Tli<?jr wre 
tnodemb- Iti ()rit'f,^hDt why tj^jr more « 

CORLtSS. COON dl CO. 
60 BrciAdway, Tro>, N. Y. 



il' CORLISS COON ceo. 




6RCAT mOOO HIT IN MUSIC 

HIAWATHA 

A Sixty-Cent Piece. 

Our price 30c 
If not proairable of 
your deaJer, send us 

25c. 

each, for any one in the 
list, except Hiawatha. 

$1.00 

for any six, including 
iliawatlia. 



nOe Fi»g* vf iht 110,000 Pltf, 



"Hiawatha." A beautiful 
fptermeKBo. "Earns to play 
and Terr catchy. We paid 
$ lO.OOOforthispleceand 
predict a greater sale for it 
than has ever been reached 
\ij any infltromental piece. 

"I>lxleland." Harcb two- 
step. Introdudnfir Old 
Black Joe. A very clever 
number. 

"Cecelia." A new waits. 
Has an irresistible swine. 
Yon cannot faU to like thu 
one. 

'Smoky Top««." Two- 
steow Characteristic. You 
win not be disappointed in 
this one. It Is very pretty. 

'Dream Ijady." MardL 
Starts off wfth a strain 
which marks It for a win- 



• Cordelia." March two- 
step. Sounds like a son^r 
title but is not. Is even 
more musical than its 



" Dolores. " ^ Two-step by 
composer of Hiawatha. 
ACnbanDansa. imeofthe 
very best in our catalogue. 

"Prayer and Paaaion." 
Walts. A very beautiful 
number. Easy to play. 

'Cubanola." A Spanish 
Love Serenade. Cam be 
used for two-step. 

* Hearts Oouraseous." 
To say that they are great 
is an accurate description. 

* Sue. " Two^tep by Fred 
Stone. A novelty. Very 
easy to play. 



Ten of our most 
1 beautiful sonars. 
; Any one of these 
included in our 
six for $1.00 offer, 
or SS cents each. 



"To-Hiffht.* 

"My Dream lAdy." 

"To Thee, Dipareat One." 

"There's No Other Oirl L ke Tou." 

(Walts Song.) 
"Hiawatha." (Song.) 
"You Tell Me Your Dream." 
"Daffo Down Dilly." 
" Dream Sprite. " (Lullaby.) 
"I 'Wanta a Man Like £«meo." '' 
"Lenore." 

The Oreat 'Whitney-'Warner Mandolin CTollection, co]> 
stating of first and second mandolin, guitar and piano ace. 
26c. each book. Send for our beautifully illustreted 
catalogue FSRB. You are sure to find something in it 
that wiU interest you. 

WhItMy-Wanier P«b. Co., 35 State St., DelroH, Mich. 




"(X>MB, OLD CHAP. BKACB UP AND LET Ml TAKB TOU BOMB AND 8QUABB TOU WITH TOUB (HIO) WIFB." 



lit 



"''^^^ 



>**WS 



THE 



EQUITABLE 



IS 



HtNRY B.HYDE 



JWAltXAMlER 

Pnfe-4lt>ENT 



Vlt'E PRb<klDtNT 






'1100^ ABQUT$1 

^\^ ' ' '"ii a IV e e U paid on 

W^4^-^ an tncJowrnent in the £quft<ible 

^#P| will give $1,000- wWh proCits- 

¥Wi^''4i *** voti at the end of 20 years 

^'fi^.^ " ** y**^ live. 

rA:'^ '^^ If you die your family receives 

V^M*^^^ $1,000 at once . Issued in amounts from 

;;;rBr''M: $1,000 to $200,000- 






f»**ySTal*lorinen ol (mtt^v anrf thnt^trr 10 aft 4^ i-feprrvenlativ^^. 



SEND THIS COUPON FOR PARTICULARS OR WRITS, 



THE KQUITABLE LIFE ASSURANCE SOUBTY OP THE 
UNITED hiTATES, 130 BnOACiiViT, I*Bw Yufiii, tNspLNo. ST. 

Fleast' actid ide luff^rmjition resanlliiK an Eiidnwineut for 

I M iii^tiud at ypflT* of jigt. 

XamCn 

ArJdn?** 



LIFE 



■ 




■ 


^^^^^^^V" "^S 


King Eduard drank 

WHITE ROCK at the 

Lord Mayor's banquet 





GO RtGHT TO CHRRMGE HEMBQVURJERS 

Write to-day for our tllnstnted catalogue (free) which describes our goods truthfnllj, 
ezpUuns our method and our guarantee and makes it safe, simple and easy for you to 
get carriages, harness and horse accessories direct from our factory at wholesale prices. 

THE COLUMBUS CARRIAGE mSd HARNESS COMPANY. 
Faetory Mtf GsAsral 0«ct, Coluabus, 0. Wtstern Ofict k Dlstribntiiig House. 8t Louis, Mo. 

Write to neareit oOoaw 



Ask your Wife 




Avenue of Palms, California. 

To go to California with you this spring and escape inclement 
weather at home. California's climate is perfect. Travel on 
the CalifomioL Limited— absolutely finest train in the world. 



All about the California tour in our books. 



Atcbisoo. Topelui & 
Santa Fe ITy 



Santa Fe 



Geo. Pass. Office 

1312 Qt. Northern BMg. 

Chicago 




^ CIGAKETm 

A JHTANDARDOr 

EXCELLENCE IJN5URPA5JED 




MBIOAOWAY. 688M0A»WAY. 
723 SIXTH AVCNUL 

WtW YOWL 



Imported Qarments 

in Lac« and Appliqu* Effects. 

Peau de Soie, Taffetas. Pongee, Broadcloth 

and Etanune. 

Walklns: CoaU, 

in Kersey and Covert Cloths. 

Evening: and Summer Wraps 

in light colors. 
Tissot, Cloth and Crash 

Travelling: Coats. 

French Aotomobfle Coats 
(Rain ProofJ. 

dOusodorai^ c^ 1 9t£ dt 

NEW YORK. 



GOVT? 



RETOKVBRrt, 

MlliUry Goods, NEW 



and OLD, 



pword**. 

Mietiooed/o 



. Banuerman, 679 B»w^. H. Y. Ifio CalTg «Td to 



WHITMANS 

Chocolates 



Don't miss all of tbc 
sweet thmg^ ol lile* Try 
a box of WHtTM AN'i 

'Tul*' in A mm-itF* l-j,jt piiT-T s.r njllit 

STEPHEN F, WHITMAH A SON, 

1310 Ch««tnMt St«f PhltadamMa. 



LIFE 




Columbia's Seal 



In emboctspd gilded 
brass, with colore en- 
ameled ; a perfect fac- 
simile of o r i ff i n a 1 . 
Mounted on Flemish 
Oak shield. Size,10Hx 
1SV4 Inches 

Delivered anywhere 
on receipt of 92. SO. 

Also. flralM of Harvard, 
Princeton, Pennsyl- 
vania.ValeudCoraell, 
mounted t he same «ray , at 
Nil me price, or complete 
■et of sU for 913.00. 

Just the thing for Den 
deoonitloDS. 
Cirrular rbowlnff aeal in colors 
m-J.ed on request. 

CECIL H. SHERMAN A CO., 27 Soathlltli St., Philadelphia 



WASSERMANN BROTHERS 

STOCK BROKERS 
40 EXCHANGE PLACE, NEW YORK 

Members of New York Stock Exchange 



BRANCH OFFICES: 

753 Fifth Avenue (Plaza Bank). 

Windsor Arcade, comer >46tb St. and 5th Ave. 

Astor Court (Waldorf-Astoria Hotel). 

Imperial Hotel. 

6 West 26th St., opposite Marttn's Restaurant. 

Fifth Avenue Hotel. 



MORTON TRUST COMPANY 

38 Nassau Street, New York 

Capital, . $2,000,000 

Sorplus and Undivided ProQls, $5,815,982 

OFFICERS: 

LEVI P. MORTON. President 

THOMAS P. RYAN, Vice- President 

JAMES K. C0RBrERE,2d Vice-Prest. 
H. M. FRANCIS, Secretarii 

0. L. WILMERDING, Asst. Secretary 

H. B. BERRY, Trust Officer 

EXECUTIVE COMMITTEE : 

Levi P. Morton Joseph G. Hendriz 

Thomas F. Ryan James N. Jarvie 

Bdward J Berwind George Foster Peabody 

G. G. Haven Jacob H. Scblff 

William C. Whitney 



COUGHS, 

Bronchitis, Hoarseness, 

Sore Throat, 

Effectively Relieved. 

Fac-Simtle 
Signature of 



bronchml] 



on every 
box. 



;VEN DRUGGISTS will at times try and sell 
' tlieir customers interior Mineral Waters when 
they ask for CARL H. SCHULTZ'S. 

Why? 

Profits on inferior hranda are double the 
profits made on our products. 

CARL H. SCHULTZ. 




THE "IXOCRPTA." 



DO YOU LIKE GOOD COFFEE? 



You can have it, every time, if you use an *' EXCERPTA" CoflFee 
Pot. A delicious beverasre. clear and frag^rant as wine, made 
instantaneously, NO BOILING. NO EGGS. 

AROMA, FLAVOR, HEAT and STRENGTH preserved. 
SIMPLE, PRACTICAL, DURABLE. 

A beautiful coffee pot in which to make and from which to serve — 
just the things to use at a dainty breaicfast or a charing; dish supper. 

Send us your address and a stamp and receive a copy of one of the 
World's Masterpieces and particulars of the "EXCERPTA"— 
they will interest you. 

HOUSEHOLD MFG. CO., 89 Dun Building, Buffalo, N. Y. 



We Invite Your Deposit Account 



55 Cedar Street, New York 

WEST END OFFICE, 73D STREET AND BROADWATf 
CAPITAL AND SURPLUS 

FIVE MILLIONS 



Obaiclbs H. Vak Bainrr Paxsr. 
RoucaT H. McCuBOT, yio*lnun. 



€APITAI«, $1,000,000 



Jajoeb a. BuBDKir, Ja^ Vica>PaniT. 
JOBUf ALTnr Touxo, vxcb-Pbsbt. 



SURPLUS, $500,000 



FoBD HuinrnroTox, Trxas. 
A. Ooaoox KoaaiK, Bbct. 



lKtn65or Ci-ru^i (^ouipauii 



FOTB AVSIHTK AKD FQBTT-8SVS]rrH STBSKT, NXW YoHK 



Aognst Belmont 
James A. Borden, Jr. 
John Fox 

Andrew PreedmaD 
James H. Gayley 
Robert L. Gerry 



Robert Walton Goelet 
JohnlLHaU 
Ernest Iselin 
WUllamJay 
William sTLeeds 
Bobert H. Jf cCordy 



OrRECTOKS 

Cord Meyer 
OgdenlUllii 
Delancey Niooll 
Daniel (VDay 
Ghas. LathropPack 
Morton F. Plant 



Robert C. Pravn 
Jordan J. Rollins 
Philip Stockton 



James Tlmpson 
OorneUus vanderMlt 



Charles H. Van Brunt 
Coas. D. Wetmore 
Archibald 8. White 
Oea W. Yonnff 
Jolm AlTin Yoan^ 



Guaranty Trust Co* of New York 

mataal Life Bolldlns:, 

NASSAU. CORNER CEDAR STREET 
LONDON OFFICES 33 1X>1CBAR0 ST., £. C. 60 ST. JAMES ST., S. W. 



Fiscal Agents of the 
United States Government. 



} 



Manila. Philippine Islands. 
Hong Kong, China. 



\ 



Depository of the Government of 
the Philippine Islands, Manila. 



Capital, $2,000,000 Snrplas and UndlY lded Profits, $5,369,000 

INTEREST ALLOWED ON DEPOHITH SUBJECT TO CHEQUE OR ON CERTIFICATE. 

Acta as Tmstee for Corporatloiis. i-trms and Individuals; and as Oaardian. Executor and Administrator; 
Takes entire charge of Real and Personal Estates; carefully selected securities oiTered for investment. 

TRAVELERS' LETTERS OP CREDIT AVAILABLE IN ALL PARTS OF THE WORLD. 
COMMERCIAL LETTERS OP CREDIT ISbUED. 



DRAFTS on all parts of Great Britain. Prance. Germany, China and Philippines BOUGHT aDd%OIjD. 

WALTER G. OAKMAN, President ADRIAN ISELIN. JR . Vice President. 

GEORGE R TURNBCLL, 2d Vlce-Prest. HENRY A. MURRAY. 3d Vice-President. 

WM. C. EDWARDS. Treasurer. JOHN GAULT. Manager Foreign Department. 

E. 0. HEBBARD, Secretary. F. C. HARRIMAN, Assistant Treasurer. 

R. C. NEWTON, Trust Officer. 
DIRBCTOBS * 
George F. Baker. R. Somers Hayes, Levi P. Morton. 

George S. Bowdoin, Edwin Uawley, Alexander E. Orr. 

August Belmont, Charles R. Henderson, Walter G. Oakman, 

Frederic Cromwell, Adrian Iselln.jr.. Henry H. Rogers. 

Walter R. Gillette, Augustus D. Jullliard, H. McK. Twombly, 

G. G. Haven, Janies N. Jarvie. Frederick W. Vanderbilt, 

E. H. Harrtman, Richard A. McCnrdy, Harry Payne Whitney. 



LIFE- 



Ihe umw mMU:iiivL\ t^imp tot tkin aritJ 

ihv BAHiti vLnui^ It tieautLi^in vb» 
nk tn — «s ublii! h u* beaJ LL y eg b .J Itki lif . 
It f^fnnfej uid corr^tfj. For dun- 
tJrtilT, Ittrhlriff, tfUtJtJve »cuk>, AiJiktic 
hifclr^ fN^Zfina, 1 1 Is miequiilt^^ 1 1 in k 
d^rl VB 1 1 v/ rj f ! h*» f*inn u b s U in ol ntmcf^t 




Write for 

illustrated 

booklet A.A. free. 

JOSKPH BIX03I CRUCIBIJB OO4 
Jer««r City, If. J. 



WE 
PAY 
POST- 
AGE. 



All Toa have gneraed abont 
life insarance may be wroDe. 
If yoa wUh to know the troth, 
Bend for "How and Why,»' 
iiisoed by the 

Pbnn MiTTUAL Lire. 

fiSl-a^S Chestnot Street, 

Philadelphia. 



Thert U a NjituraJ Affinily btiwecn the 
Hcinun Or^mlnn kmf 

SBREDDED\^SS^ BISCUIT 

The Ctiemical PirtA ttfid the l¥opor- 
tlonfl at both ftrc PRECISELY THE SAME. 

This Nstiiml Food iemi» Itaelf to Saiv- 
ory Combination!! that ileUf bt tll« Eye 
And please the Patatc. 

Bc£jiit»e Shre<td«d Wheat utlsrica 
both the &cn9« «nd Senses It may be 
termed th« Senilble Food ftM- ScnS' 
ibie People* 

Are yvu o«ie of ihem ? 

Shrcddrd \^lio!c ^^liLat BisicuU b sold by oil 
KTtitci-s. Send for *'Thc Viiat Quest] on" {rot>k 
BfMik ii11u5inited in colors) FREK. Addrcs* 

THI MATURAL FOOD CO., 
Niafltra Fltfi, It. Y^ ^ 





REPARTEE. 
Ostrich : IF T017B Lias WMEM AS LONG AS Mllf I TOC*D Bl AS TALL AS I AM. 

Mr, Due':: tbs, and if your hbad was as loko as minb tou'd ksow as xuch as i ro. 



You 
press 
the 
button — 




them 

do 
the 
rest* 



KODAK 

Developing Machines 

do away absolutely with the dark-room and give 
better results than the old way. Anybody can make 
perfect pictures by the Kodak System. Ask your 
dealer to show you. 

Kodaks* $5.00 to $75.00. Brownie Cameras. $1.00 and $2.00« 
Kodak Developing Macl^ines» • • • $2.00 to $10.00« 



Kodak Lit9ra turt «/ tfu tUaltrs «r ky matL 

Catalog ues, fret. 

Carre sfcndtnct School Circular s,/r€*, 
Kodak Raby Book,/rtt. 

Kodak P,*rt/oli4>, containing 40friMt ^gitming 
^iurtt, ten cents. 



EASTMAN KODAK CO. 

Rochester, N. Y. 



PNCBS or TMC . 



phatt eo.f ncw tomk. 



[(mm 



m 






»# - •■^. ' 




Libby's ^^^^Fw) Food Products 

tempt the tired palate with their exquisite Havor. and the dainty ways 
ill which they -can be served. 

Lihbys Veal Loat" makes must delightful luncheons— always ready- 
easy to serve— wholesome, appetizing, satisfying. 

It's only one of Libby's Good Things to Eat. 

nandsiime illustrtiteil liooklet, "Good Things tn Eat," sent free. Send Hve 2c stamps for 
large Atlai; cf the world, in colors. 

Uhhy, McJWeilt 4^ Libby, 

Chicago^ 







SCOTCH WHISKY DISTILLERS 

BY ROYAL WARRANTS OF APPOINTMENT 

AND SUPPLIERS TO 

H, M. THE KING and H. R. H. PRINCE OF WALES 



•« ••VAi 





cc 



••HERE'S TAE YE'. HOOT, MON, IT'S A' REETl" 

THE POPULAR SCOTCH WHISKY 

BLACK AND WHITE" 

JAMES BUCHANAN & CO., 43 Broadway, New York. 



Ar»*T"UTTr» T T»TT T T^T TT '.J 0»-»,_ «»- 



VOLUME XLI. 



~*SW YORK. APRIL 9, I903. 

Entend **^* New Tort Pd« Offlce as Second-ClMs MaU Hatter. 
''^Pyrlght, 1902, by Lira I 



NUMBER 1067. 




' POOB OLD BIRD I 

who'll cut off his HBADT ' 

"l/* SAID UNCLB BAM. 

" I don't cars a : 
I'll cut off his hbad.' 



eO^VRIOHT POfll 



UNOKR TMK A6T OF 10«1. 



LIFE 



>0^N NORDBN 
TRUST COMPANY 

751 FIFTH AVENUE.NEAR 58^.- STREET 
NE:W YORK 

Capital and Surplus, $2»ooo,ooo 

Transacts a general banking and tmst business. Pays interest on deposits, subject to 
dieck. Takes entire charge of investments and collects incomes. Furnishes information 
aboat inrastraents and other bnsmess matters. Accepu Trusts. Issues Letters of Credit. 



No. 24 

Security and convenience are assured by paying house- 
hold bills through the medium of a checking account with 
Van Norden Trust Company. 

If a receipted bill is lost, the cancelled check remains 
a permanent evidence of payment. 

2 or 2^ per cent, interest allowed on deposits. Higher 
rates of interest on deposits left for stated periods. 



OF PIC BR s 

Warner M. Van Norden, Frttidtnt Arthur King Wood, Secrttarr A» Trtat, 

Wflliam F. Havemeirer, Viet'Prestdent William W. Robinson, Aia't trtmturfr 

Morton C. Nichola, ViwPrtiidtni James B. Haig, Jr., Ats't Trtasurtr 

TRUST DEPARTMENT 
Edward S. Avery • • Trust OjfUtr 



DIR 1 



; T OR S 



Warner Van Norden 

Warner M. Van Norden 

William F. Havemeyer 

John H. Flagler 

JameiTaloott 

Hon. Cornelius N. Bliss 

JohnClaflin 



Domoot Clarke 
Henry F. Shoemaker 
Bcmamin Perkins 
Richard L. Edwards 
John H. Washburn 
Jonathan B. Currey 



Thomas P. Fowler 
Ernst Thalmann 
Charles W. Morse 
Mahlon D. Thatcher 
Henry H. Cook 
Henry T. Bronson 
Arthur A. Fowler 



$2,500,000 

NEW YORK CITY 3 %0/^ 

Tax Exempt Gold Bonds 

(Payable in Fifty Years) 
TO BE SOLD THURSDAY, APRIL 9. 1903 



OFFERED D/RECT TO INVESTORS 



A legal invettment for trust f^nds. exempt from taxation 
except for State purposes. No *'aU or none" bids received, thus 
giving investors the same advantagea at dealers. Bonds are 
awarded to bidders offering the highest premium. 

A bid of 108.75 yields 8.15 per eeiit. Ineonie 
A bid of 107.44 yields 3.20 per cent. Income 
A bid •€ 106.14 yields 3.25 per cent. Income 

Send bids in a sealed envelope, enclosed in the addressed envelope. TWO 
PER CilNT. OF PAR VALUE MUST ACCOMPANY BID. It must be 
in cash or certified check on State or National bank of New York Citv. This 
deposit will, if requested, be returned day of sale to unsuccessful bidden. 
For ftiller information see "City Record," published at 2 City Hall, 
New York. 

Consult any Bank or Trast Company^ or address 

EDWARD M. GROUT, Comptroller Gty off New York 

280 Broadwayf New York 



QUEENS COUNTY 
JOCKEY CLUB 



^yiqtuduct, L. /. 



Carter Handicaf 

TO BE RUN OPENING DAY 
APRIL 15s 1903 



7 Fxirlon^s 



SmmomAAg%, Xte. 

Hennls,4 ISS 

01dBDgkuid,4..1tt 
8ombrno,4 .. .l«i 
Francesco, 4 .... 119 

Articulate, 6 118 

Royals 115 

8yrliD,a0Bd 114 

NamtorTl 118 

OrdnoDg, afled..ll8 
Demurrer. . . . .100 
MonoffrmiMi,6 ...100 

ArtvteLS lOH 

Bon Hot, 4 106 

Toang Henry, 6..108 

BthiccS 108 

Doellst,6 107 



KmMwisdAQt, Urn. 

Contend, 6 106 

Money Moss, 6... 106 
Spencer Reir,t....l*<0 
Wealth.6 . .. 106 
PaalCliirord.5....1Uft 

Potenta, aged. 106 

RlghtfuVl 104 

IsU,6 108 

Hlave, t 108 

Hlmadf, 6 108 

Wax Candle, 8..... 109 

Yellow Tail, IOC 

MarBballNeU,6.. lOi 

Kaloa,0 lOS 

8euaker,4 10S 

April Shower, 4... 108 



yamtamdAfft, Lbt, 

Glincrack,8 101 

lDjaDCtion,8 100 

Janeway, 8 100 

Lord Badge, 4. lU) 

TheBegent,6 100 

Daly,6 lOU 

Palmist, 8. 100 

TamO*8hanter,8 .100 

8ilarlan,6 100 

John A. Scott, 8... 100 

Remorse. 4 90 

Ahamada,8. 90 

CaptlTator,8 08 

SLDanleLS. I« 

Roeetlnt,8 97 

Hh&otaor, 8 97 



Par ExcellcDtt,4.. 
BarLeDac,C ... 
BobMcUu,t 

Canrtling. 1 

Nomflral,! 

Dr. Baylor. I 

Saturday.! 

KnigbtofOoid,l.. 

TogatBer,! 

DakeofKenML 

ODaardii,6 

Aocke.8 

Black Dick, 6 

Ahola,S 

Illyila,8 



Track can be reached fh)in foot of East 34th St., also Fls 
bush Ave., Brooklyn, and Kings Co. '<L" Boad. Seedai 
papers for Time Tables. 



GORDON'S 
DRY GIN 



Procurable 
Everywhere 




Most Popular 

With 
Connoisseurs 



FOR COCKTAILS. FIZZES 
AND RICKYS 

REPRESENTED IN ) E. LAMONTAGNE & SONS 

THE u. S. BY i 45 Beaver St, New Yon 



-o^;^^^ 



COLLEGE 



LIFE 



^ 3 19^:^ :^»9 



Expensive. 




1 T was a beautiful evening in the Spring of 2001. The moon 
-^ shone pale and transcendent in the clouds above, and as the 
two lovers sat close together, no sound was heard save the stealthy 
tread of the t>ii© Hi>»'ctator to their tryst. 
The yonuK man pr^'ssed the maiden to his heart, and turning her 
face to bK ^vrls about to kiss her, when she drew back. 
jc^-^K **Darliuk^" she asked anxiously, "what is the tax on 

^^3i^Xi>^ kisses?" 

"^ ''One dollar each," he observed grimly, "but I 

don't care if my salary is mortgaged up to next 

Cbmtmas. I'm desperate for a kiss. ' * 

' ' Don't ! " she said pleadingly. ** The tax assessor 

watching our every movement and is ready to 

chalk it down. Ton know, even now, it is costing 

you fifty cents an hour to be with me." 

*' I know it r* exclaimed her lover, ** but, my 
darling, aside from our own cramped finances, 
you know the trusts must live. The head of the 
Lover's Trust is only worth eight trillions, and sup- 
pose we should go out of business I Why, his divi- 
dends might be cut down. No, no. Let us love, 
even if the tax is raised to a dollar an hour and 
there is no bread in the house. I must be true to 
TO J (country's best interests." 
*' Yon are right," she said, yielding to his superior 
mind. 

And as their lips met in a long, lingering 
dollar kiss, the registering machine, planted 
twenty feet back of them, clicked out its 
ominous sound, showing that John Jones, 
American citizen, had been docked for one 
kiss by the United States Amalgamated 
Lover's Trust. 



Development. 
" 'yHIS Congress," remarks Rep- 

-^ sentative Payne, '* has given 
greater attention to private business 
than any of its predecessors." 

Is not this unavoidably so? 

In the earlier stages of national 
development, when interests are 
more nearly common, enough graft 
to make elections safe may be effect- 



uated by general legislation. But 
with the complication of human rela- 
tions, graft takes on more of the 
chai-acter of individuality, so to 
speak, and special or private legisla- 
tion is necessary. 

The condition which Mr. Payne 
calls attention to shows that we 
have easily emerged from the chrys- 
alis state. 




•te-l yi.\Khii> 



Polar Bear : hahg thb luck I not a dbop ov loa 

WATSR rOB ▲ BATH t 



320 



LIFE 




' » H'kiie there is U/e there's Hope:* 

VOL. XLl. APRIL 9, 1908. No. 10«7. 

19 West Thirtt-First St.. Niw York. 




Pabllflhed ereir Thursday. $&00 a year In ad- 
Tauoe. FoAtaffe to foreiffo coimtriee In the Ponul 
Union, f 1.U4 a year extra, ctlnsle current copies. 
10 cents. Back numbers, after three months from 
date of publication. 26 cenU. 

No contribution will be returned unless 
accompanied by stamped and addressed 
envelope. 

The illustrations in \a¥}L are copyrighted^ 
and are not to be reproduced. 

Prompt notification should be sent by sub- 
scribers of any change of address. 

)RBsn>ENT Roose- 
velt's Coal Strike 
Ck)mmis8ioD has 
made a report with 
which no one finds 
fault. It gives the 
strikers ten per 
cent, increase of 
wages, which they 
oonld have got 
from the operators 
with oat the help of a Com- 
mission. It rejects the 
demand of the United Mine 
Workers for recognition, 
and recommends the an- 
thracite miners to form a 
union of their own. 

It defends the non-union workmen, 
and contends vigorously for the right 
of every man to settle for himself, if 
he chooses, the terms of his employ- 
ment. It condemns the boycott and 
all the violent means strikers are wont 
to use, and did use to such a scandal- 
ous extent in Pennsylvania, to carry 
their point. It finds that the conditions 
under which the miners live were 
not so bad as was made out, and did 
not necessitate their sending their 
children to work too early. It con- 
demns the practice of letting young 
breaker-boys vote on strike questions, 
and it recommends that Congress 
should devise means for investigating 
and passing upon the merits of future 
coal strikes, though it does not go so 
far as to recommend compulsory ar- 
bitration. Inasmuch as the Com- 
mission included men very favorable 
to the labor side of strike disputes, 
as well as men whose natural inclina- 
tion might be expected to tend in the 



other direction, their unanimous agree- 
ment in this report gives it great 
weight. Its greatest merit is the vigor 
with which it condemns the idea that 
a strike is a state of war, in which 
what are, practically, war methods 
are warrantable. 




pHARLES G. LEIiAND, who died 
^-^ last month in Florence, Italy, 
lived to be nearly fourscore, and spent 
most of the last thirty years of his life 
in Europe. We all knew him best as 
the author of the ballads of "Hans 
Breitman," which he produced about 
a generation ago. They are first-rate 
ballads of their kind, and in their day 
were so profusely popular that they 
are still far from lost to the public 
memory. But they were hardly more 
than a lucky incident in Mr. Leland's 
life. He was a man who took his time 
about living, and tried hard to get out 
of life what good things it contained. 
To all appearance he succeeded re- 
markably well. He was an eager stu- 
dent from childhood, and joined humor 
and enthusiasm to notable erudition. 
He became an authority on gypsies, on 
folk-lore, on the Celtic language, and on 
manual training in schools. He was 
an editor and a writer in New York and 
Philadelphia for about thirty years, in 
the course of which he was a member 
of the staff of the first American hu- 
morous paper, the short-lived Vanity 
Fair. The rest of his life he seems to 
have sp^nt in acquiring knowledge and 
having fun in his intelligent and hard 
working way. His excellent example 
is respectfully commended to the pres- 
ent generation of Americans, which 
seems too distracted about dollar- hunt- 
ing to have much fun, and in too much 
of a hurry about everything, to get all 
the flavor and all the joy out of any- 
thing. 




/^NB thing at least the Americans of 
^^ our generation find time to do — 
they read the newspapers. They have 
read a vast amount within a month 
about a murder in Buffalo. It has 
been interesting reading of its kind. 
The murder had its mystery, which at 



this writing is still unimpaired. Be- 
fore the inquest we had clnes and 
theories by the column, but they came 
to nothing. At the inquest we got a 
vast amount of testimony, the upshot 
of which was that the murdered man's 
wife had a lover who was infatuated 
with her, and that his infatuation was 
diligently reciprocated. When this in- 
fatuated lover took his own wife out 
in an automobile a day or two before 
the inquest, and ran himself and her 
over the edge of a stone quarry, killing 
both, interest was undoubtedly added 
to the situation. Following the testi- 
mony at the inquest has been a good 
deal like reading a French novel, and 
it is no more than just to say that the 
moral of the situation has been well 
brought out. Making love to another 
nian'.s wife is not an expedient exercise, 
and if she has children it is doubly in- 
expedient. Who killed Mr. Bnrdick 
has not been disclosed, but the pre- 
sumption is strong that both he and 
the Pennells would have been alive if 
Penuell's attentions had been confined 
to his own wife. 




"DRESIDBNTIAL politics are get- 
ting interesting, and there is 
much to encourage the hope that there 
will be a real campaign next year be- 
tween two good men. either one of 
which is fit to sit at the head of the 
national table. One of them will 
doubtless be Colonel Roosevelt, but no 
one can yet say who will be the other. 
In the East, there has been a revival of 
interest in Mr. Cleveland, who is to 
make a tour of the West for the better 
discernment of the feelings of that part 
of our population. Will he run him- 
self ? Possibly ; and if he does he will 
get a great many votes. But it seems 
more likely that he goes West, not so 
much to test his personal hold on the 
voters, as to test their attachment to 
the policies, and the sort of Democratic 
Government, that he, better than any 
other living Democrat, represents. As 
a forerunner, whose voice is to be the 
voice of one crying *' Prepare for a real 
Democrat ! " no one could equal him. 



LIFE 



321 



Experientia Docet. 

'T^HERE was once a carious and energetic jouth who wished to 
"^ see something of th^ worli], bo hi? went to hjs^ father i^titl fl&bl : 

"Father, my experiejit-e lairln^rto hita bee» soroewliat limited, 
and I wish to enlarge it. ^^^hui ^^ uuld you adrisif ? '^ 

His father gave htm i>ne hutidn^d dcfllarft^ 

" Here, my boy,'^ he si:tid. ^' Go out ftiic] learn Sfimething/' 

By and by the boy ertiue back and Haid ; 

" Father, I got as £juu<h tx[}t'riHnoe on I could with that 
hundred, but I find thut I iii-tHi mam to t^iirrj put certain 
investigations I am bLTomiiig iutirrB^ted in/* 

This time his fath^ r gave hun two hundred dollar?, 
and the youth went ewuy rt?jojciiig. After a whilt?, bow- 
ever, became back agiiiu and «aid i 

*' Fatlier, I find that exi^trieuee is aomcwhat expensive 
Now could you ? '' 

This time his father gave bjut five biindred. * 

It was not long, hdraver^ before he was back 
again. 

"Once more, father," ho said, *^ 1 bave couie 
to ask your kind a^fti stance/' 

This time, however, tlie father fihoi>k biti head, 

•' You have had R'nua of the experieuce thai 
can be bought wkh ca^ib,'' be 
observed, "and now, my stiu, sup- 
pose you go out and try liouie of 
the experience that money cannot 
buy. This, you will iind, ia fnlly aa 
valuable as the other, if not more 
so." 

So the son went awn y, ex- _. 

oeedingly sorrowful. 

In the course of time, how- 
ever, he came back. There 
was a bright smile on hU liice. 

"Well," aaid his fnther, 
" how did you make out?" 

"First-rate, father" said 
the now experienced youth- 
" You see, with the fir^t pay- 
ments you made tome, 
I established a line of 
credit, so this last 
time I had every- 
thing charged. 
Here are the bills." 

MORAL. 

It's a wise father 
who knows his own 
son. 

Surprised 

^'A/fADAME, I 

-^■^ caught your 
husband making love to my wife. '* 

"Oh, lovely! Thm he hasn't forgot, 
ten how !" 

''T^HATis Easter on the Avenue, 
'^ anyway?** 
•• Why, it is merely the general ap- 
proval of society on the rising of the 
Lord." 




HOW LONO WILL IT TAKB TO MAKE THIS KOKUMSNT TO MT HUSBAND 7 * 
*' OH, ABOUT TWO MONTHS, MA'aM,'* 

"but I MAT NOT WANT IT TDEN." 



322 



LIFE 




1n|:rical and philosophical analysis 

»f Mm. Eddy '8 book by M. Carta 

Sturge, should be read by 

every sincere putter of this 

question. (£. P. Dutton and 

^ Company. $1.50.) 

Lunclieom is a supplement 
to Mary Honald's Century 
Cook Book^ and is devoted to 
suggestions for tasty dishes, 
the preparation of which is 
facilitated by numerous pho- 
tographic illustrations. (The 
Century Company. $1.40.) 
J, B, KerfooL 



The Captain : takb in that spinhaksb. wb arb nbarimo thb fu^tibob. 




^T'/m? Better Sort, by Henry James, is the 
-^ most important of the unusual num- 
ber of collections of short stories which have 
marked the opening of the new season. 
Coming from Mr. James, the book is almost 
an offer for a compromise. 8o marked is 
the evidence of a reaction from his extreme 
manner that there are whole sections where 
one forgets the method in enjoyment of the 
matter. Both author and readers should 
profit by the change. (Charles Scribner's 
Sons. $1.50.) 

Another collection, by Israel Zangwill, 
bears the title of T?ie Grey Wig, It in- 
cludes his Great Bow Mystery (1892) and 
Mtrely Mary Ann (1893). Th^ shorter tales 
are, as usual, in quite a different style from 
his novels and are marred by a forced effort 
after epigrammatic smartness. (The Mac- 
millan Company. $1.50.) 

Some sketches by Arthur Colton, who has 
already published one good novel and a 
number of short stories, appear in Tioha, 
Some of them are excellent. The book, 
however, includes so many and such sudden 



changes of mood that the casual seeker 
after amusement will scarcely trouble to 
follow them. (Henry Holt and Com- 
pany. $1.20.) 

In marked contrast to these is Tht- 
Turquoise Cup, containing two stori. s 
by Arthur Cosslett Smith, the first a U ie 
of Venice, the second one of the SahjLni 
They are neither subtle nor smart, but 
they are bright and charmingly writt^ n 
and enable you, for half an hour, to fn 
get weariness and worry, ((^arl 
Scribner*s Sons. ($1.25.) 

Basil King's new story. In the 
Garden of Charity, has for setting 
tha rugged coast of Nova Scotia, 
and for actors the simple fisher 
folk of those bleak shores. The 
book is extremely well written and 
holds the interest in spite of the rather 
psychologic nature of the theme — tlae 
struggle between love and jealousy in 
the minds of two women. (Harper 
and Brothers. $1.50.) 

One constantly hears expressed a re- 
quest for a succinct and logical setting 
forth of the doctrines of Christian 
Science, and the irony of the demand 
is usually unconscious. The IHUh 
and Error of Christian Science, a 



OTHER BOOKS RECEIVED. 

The Layt qf Ancient Borne. Bj 
Tbomas Batilngton Macaulay. 
Tlie Temple Classics edition. 
(The Macmlllan CompMiy. 60c.) 

Patiemct, or BunthomeU Bride. 
By W. 8. Gilbert. (Doableday, 
Page and Company. $1.00.) 

Hie Story, ThHr Letters. By 
F. D. B. (P. J. Drake and Com- 
paoy, Chicago.) 

Bf tactions itf Bridget McNyUw 
By Prank C. Voor&les. (Dlck- 
PabUshlng CompMiy.) 

Mrt. MeFlggs of the V^ry Old Scratch. 
By VrmiA C. Voorhles. (Mutual Book Com- 
l^j, Boston.) 

The Ootet of SUenct. By Robert Love- 
(The Knickerbocker Press.) 

THumphiof Seienee. Edited hy M. A. L. 
Lane. One of the exoelleni Yoath*s Com- 
panion Series. (Ginn and Company, Bos- 
ton.) 




"yes, those patxnt brbakfabt poods gats MS 

INDIOSSTION, AMD II T DOCTOR BAS BBOOXXSMDBD A 
XJOHT DIST OF KUT8." 



LIFE- 



323 




** Now we come to t7u underiyinQ thought*^* 

GIVING UP. 
The Millionaire Sunday School Class. 

Topic : Giving Up. (Golden Thought : Give and Make Others Give. 



T EADER: You will notice that our 
-^ topic this morning is Giving Up, 
•which, we infer from the Scripture lesson, 
means that we mast give up something in 
life. First, let me suggest that we need not ' 
worry with the argument of the Nazarene, 
that it is easier for a camel to pass thfough 
the eye of a needle than it is for a rich man 
to enter the kingdom of heaven ; the com- 
parison is not well drawn, for all depends 
upon the size of the needle and the camel. 

He also mentions that we should give all 
we have to the poor, but we know that it 
would be simply folly to consider that liter- 
ally. The Nazarene was undoubtedly a 
wise person, but He never managed a coal 
trust, nor an oil trust, nor a beef trust. If 
He lived to-day and should happen to be 
president of an oil company, and should at- 
tempt to do business on those lines. He 



would soon go to the wall. (Unanimous 
assent from the class,) 

These injunctions must be taken prac- 
tically. We naturally desire a few shares 
of the future life, therefore we know that it 
is business to give up something that will 
extend our influence with the Creator of all 
natural products — the one who made a uni- 
verse of trusts, each of which He holds in 
the hollow of His hand. The question is : 
What will be the easiest service for us ? 
Giving ! 

Now we come to the underlying thought. 
The -command to give is virtually a com- 
mand to get, for we cannot give unless we 
first get something to give. How shall we 
get it to gile ? From the people ! This 
will be a twofold work : When we get it 
from other people that we may give up, we 
will be making them give up, too, and 



they unconsciously will be saving their soulfl. 

I should like to have an expression from 
a number of the class as to how we can ar- 
range to give up something according to 
these principles. As for myself, I have ad- 
vanced the price of oil two cents on the gal- 
lon, and at the end of a year I not only will 
have made others give up, but will have 
gotten enough extra profit to enable me to 
give a few hundred thousands to a univer- 
sity. 

Coal Operator : I can easily cut miners' 
wages and clear enough to endow charities 
to help the poor buy fuel. 

Head of Beef Trust: I can fix the 
prices of beef and other meats and raise a 
sum to establish friendly inns and soup 
houses for those who cannot get enough 
work to live. 

Steel Trust Magnate : I can manage to 



324 



LIFE 



A WINDY DAY. 

MORA in BBATKN AT HBB OWN GAMB* 




clear the price of a few free libraries where 
people can read and forget their miBeries. 

Head of Sugar Trust : I can make peo- 
ple give up enough extra for sugar to de- 
fray the expenses of a hundred or so mis- 
sionaries in Cuba and the Philippines. 

Leader : This is what I call a practical 
Christian spirit. By our works we shall be 
known I Jariiea Ravenscroft, 

Ballade of the Undiscovered 
Country. 

/^H 1 for an undiscovered land 
^^ Where novelists may emigrate, 
And with their thrifty pens in hand 

Their freshly varnished tales narrate. 

Prairie and plain pass out of date ; 
The middle West is wearing out ; 

Tales of the South are decades late ; 
Oh, for a land to write about I 

New England's not in loud demand, 

Europe's a theme attenuate ; 
I'hey've done up India's coral strand, 

At Greenland they don't hesitate. 

With geographic zeal elate. 
They seek for pastures new, and shout : 

" Oh, for a wild to penetrate I 
Oh, for a land to write about ! " 

They've left, this romance- writing band, 

' No spot on earth inviolate ; 
They've set their scenes in " Beulah- 
Land," 
Or Russian steppes, or Golden Gate. 
'Tis not the plot, the style, of late,— 
It is the literary scout 

That other writers emulate. 
Oh, for a land to write about ! 

A few are bold enough, when scanned 

Entire the geographic slate, 
A spook or medium to command 

And in a trance to speculate 

Of Mars and of the moon ; or prate 
Of spheres our cosmos wide without. 

Now, will the novel-trade abate 
Without new lands to write about ? 

The novelist's a clever hand, — 
Witty and wise, he's worth his weight ! 

'Tis pitiful to see him stand 
Bafl9ed, resourceless, palpitate I 
For all the world's illuminate, — 

For " copy " 'tis turned inside out. 
Till a new planet emanate, — 

Oh, for a land to write about I 



Pity the scribe insatiate, 
Traveler from the far redoubt I 

Canst of a virgin soil narrate ? 
Where is a land to write about 7 

Olivia Howard Dunbar, 




Her Objections. 
«• A/f Y DEAR,*' whispered the hus- 

^-^ band who had aooompanied 
his better half to the shop where she 
expected to purchase a spring gown, 
"I think that dress with the black 
lace fixings on it is nobby. Why don't 
you get it?" 

** Oh, it would never do," answered 
the wife. "Everybody is wearing 
that style." 

*' Then, here's another good-looking 
one — this one with the separate jacket 
and the strap fixings on the skirt." 

** Mercy, no 1 Why, nobody is wear- 
ing that ! " 



/^REGON is a long way oflf, but so 

^-^ far as we can judge from the 

Salem Journal , wisdom abides there : 

New York Life In all Its features conttDues to 
be Americans best, cleanest and most original 
humorous paper. Its editorials have a sane and 
kindly introspection that makes the point it 
seeks to elucidate without the usual bludgeoo 
style of wriiinfir directly at the thing Itself. Ita 
political cartoons are the best that appear In any 
of the papers, and are generally broader than 
party lines. Its society poems, sketches and 
verse are better than one finds In the alleged 
society papers themselves, while Metcalfe's dra- 
matic criticisms are head and shoulders above 
anything attempted in that line. The story that 
Gibson is getting one thousand dollars apiece for 
fifty cartoons from another Illustrated weekly is 
only a tribute to the demand Lmt has made for 
his drawings.— Dtttfi/ Journal, Salem, Oregom. 



LIFE 



325 




As Deer. 

~r X the Adirondacks, one dark day, 
-■- Two men are shot for deer, and so, 
(None knew their names) the coroner, 

A facile man, as such men go. 
Held quest, and wrote the strangers down 

As John Doe and Richard Roe. 

THE EDITOR OF LIFE. 
Jkar Sir : Will yoa let me thank yon for 
the clean and bright and happy manner In which 
you have treated the festival of St. Patrlck*8 
Day r It is BO dlUlerent— although one would ex- 
pect it to be dltrerent if treated at all by Life— it 
la so very different from the unsightly and vul- 
gar way In which ilo many contemporary papers 
will treat it that as an Irishman I am anxious to 
express my thanks to you. ICany Irishmen, you 
may be sure, whether they express their thanks 
or not, will be grateful to you for your apprecia- 
tion of their sentiments regarding St Patrick's 
Day. Yours truly, P. A, Moynahan. 

Vice. 

INDIANS of the South Pacific are addicted to 
the curious vice of drinking keroflene.~/f«m 
qf Newf. 

The Devirs arts are being turned 
against him pretty often these days. 

Obviously, heathen who drink kero- 
sene are working out their own salva- 
tion. 

The great pity is that the Whiskey 
Trust is not likewise dominated by 
heavy contributors to foreign missions. 



A MISUNDERSTANDING. 

*' WHAT BSXW IS THAT* WAITBBf'' 
**" DOT, SIB, IS BB BBSW.*' 




OHE was not quite what 
^ one would call 

A beauty, save in jest : 
She was too angular and 
tall, 
Her bones too manifest. 
Yet in her manner she was 
coy- 
Decoy, I ought to say, — 
And ogled every man or 
boy 
In a coquettish way. 



Heaitless. 

It happened once she lingered 
by 
A wall where Cupid hid. 
And sought to snare him with 
a sly 
Wink of one wrinkled lid. 
Love took one glance, then 
bent his bow 
And sped a sudden dart : 
It struck, it stuck, but could 
not go 
To penetrate her heart. 



A wasted arrow then he saw 
Where rib and ribbon 
meet, 
And smiled to see her deftly 
draw 
And drop it at her feet. 
" Heartless ! " he cried. Alas, 
how true I 
She was all bones and skin I 
/( must he mortifying to 
Be frivolous— and thin, 

Felix Carmen, 




Lnv^Hght, fjoa, bit X.^> INilu JWwtf U>. 



TWO^S 



COMP** 



THK THIBD ^^^ 



snoiTJ> 



FE 







THREE'S A CROWD. 

MEMBER THAT HE 18 A CROWD. 



328 



LIFE- 



T 1 r "JTi 



DRAMA 





*a-^. — '■ ^^ 

Horse Drama and Dramatic Melange. 

TTORSE ifl king at the old Academy of Music 
-*— ^ in a play which without the useful animal 
would be very commonplace indeed. Its title, 
Uktn from the great turf event, is **The Sub- 
_ urban," and its author is C. T. Daiey. The 
aUiry is of the sloppy weather, primitive kind, 
and deals with a wrongly accused hero, a 
wietcd villain, an imposed-upou, wealthy 
ffiiher, a deserted but trusting wife and an 
bnormally precocious infant, the unnatural 
Dd unchildlike stage cleverness of the last 
tuking us wish that the Gerry Society used its 
owers with greater critical discretion. The 
h. ,^ plot wanders amid various bucolic and 
i .domestic scenes in which it becomes 
befogged with a wealth of incidents 
and characters of the usual melo- 
dramatic quality, although at times it 
becomes a mystery just what they 
have to do with the story. We know, 
however, that eventually the horse is 
going to be the real hero, aiid simul- 
taneously rescue the innocent oppressed 
J^ and punish the wicked oppressors. 
^ The scene where the horse does this 

by running and winning the Suburban 
Handicap right before the eyes of the 
audience is really thrilling, and is one of the 
best in the Academy's long list of stage 
spectacles. Racing experts may take exception to some of the 
deUils, but there is no doubt of the effect of this scene on the 
spectators. Their excitement and enthusiasm are much the same 
in expression as the feeling shown at the real event where 
thousands of dollars are in the balance. To heighten the tension 
there is the added possibility of one of the numerous horses in the 
race finishing in the laps of the audience. 

The other scenes and the acting are of slight merit. Unlike the 
English writers of melodrama, the present author pins his faith on 
the one great scene. His trans-pontine rivals usually manage to 
keep their hearers in a state of excitement from start to finish, 
piling climax on climax and thrilling scene on thrilling scene to 
the very end. Mr. Dazey hasn't done this, but it is worth while 
sitting through a good deal of the dreariness to witness the victory 
of the horse hero. • • • 

F the race scene from " The Suburban " could only have 
been introduced into " Pretty Peggy" at the Herald 
Square, we should have a compilation in one play of 
every known variety of dramatic material. The 
piece is the medium through which Grace George 
seeks once more to win the theatrical affections of 
New York. Opening with a scene in the greenroom 
of a circus where all sorts of performers are trying 
their "stunts," we are carried into the *' School for 





Scandal " atmosphere by means of a supper at which are present 
Col ley Gibber, David Garrick and their contemporaries, our 
musical senses are tickled with a rendering of *' Drink to Me Only 
with Thy Eyes," and so on through various other scenes into all 
the schools of drama, until we feel that the author, Frances Aymar 
Mathews, has been indulging in a surfeit of dramatic literature 
and that we are suffering from her indigestion. But the piece has 
been so generously mounted by Mr. W. A. Brady, and the com- 
pany has been so well rehearsed, that we are led to forget what a 
dramatic jumble it is and follow the quickly succeeding transitiona 
with real interest. This culminates when the auditorium of the 
theatre is suddenly taken complete possession of by a crowd of 
costumed actors from the stage, and the real audience feels that 
it has suddenly been invaded by a section of Donnybrook Fair or 
one of Dry Dollar Sullivan's Tammany picnics. The artistic 
value of this episode may be more than questionable, but there is no 
doubt that it creates a sensation among the spectators, and that its 
novelty and boldness make it a valuable advertisement for the 
play. 

Grace George impersonates Peg WoJfin(,t')n, the Irish actress, 
who once had Ixindon at her feet. It's a strenuous task the 
author has laid out for the star, but the latter is not feazed by the 
immensity of the undertaking, and it must be confessed that ^he 
comes out of it with considerable credit. She is not a great nor a 
finished actress, but she has an agreeable personality, a pleasant 
delivery and more than ordinary intelligence. What she lacks in 
personal magnetism she supplies with perfect self-possession. Her 
versatility was demonstrated by the ease with which she could 
pick up and drop the Irish brogue supposed to go with the part. 
This probably was not done designedly, but, if it was, it might be 
justified on the theory that she had associated so intimately with 
the English nobility that she had taken up their ways of speech 
and only accidentally and occasionally reverted to the mode of her 
early years. This peculiarity is sometimes noticed even in our 
own best society. Mr. Robert Loraiue was the David Oarrick, 
handsomer in person than his original and sufficient to the not 
great acting demands of the part. The remaining members of 
the large cast did all that could be expected of them. 

" Pretty Peggy " is a liberal performance. There is lots of it» 
and it is lar from uninteresting. The spectator gets his money's 
worth, and it fills an evening to overflowing. lietcajfe. 

LIFE'S CONFIDENTIAL GUIDE TO THE THEATRES. 

Academy qf MuMic.—** The Subartian. " See almve. 

Bfloitco.—'- Tbe Darling of ttie Gods.*' Picturesque and admirably pro- 
duced play, wltti scene located in Japan. 

BiJoH — Bfarie Cablll In ''Nancy Brown/* Musical comedy. Not 
notewortby. 

Broadway —''Th9 Prince of Pilsen/' Musical comedy. Handsomely 
staged and rather more tuneful than the averaffe. 

Casino.— "The Chinese Honeymoon/* Musical comedy. Fairly div'^rt- 
ing. 

6Vi/«H(m.— Charles Hawtrey in " A Message from Mars." Interesting 
dramaiic sermon on selfishness. 

Ai/y'tf.— '* The Jewel of Asia.** Musical comedy. Not surprisingly 

Garden.—*' Everyman/* Excellent performance of Interesting morality 
play. 

Garrick.— kunie Russell in "Mice and Men/' Amusing play, well 
presented. 

Herald »*»^<ify.— Grace George in "Pretty Peggy." See above. 

Knickerbocker.— "Mr. Bluebeard.** Musical comedy. Elaborate and 
stupid. 

Madinon 59iiar«.—** Cynthia,'* with Elsie de Wolfe as the star. Light 
polite comedy. 

Majestic.— *" The Wizard of Oz.** Funny extravaganza, handsomely 
staged. 

Manhattan.— ** The Earl of Pawlucket/' Witty comedy well acted. 

Pnncettg.—'^The Frisky Mrs. Johnson.*' Amelia Bingham In moderately 
diverting Clyde Fitch play. 

.SVitJoy.— "The Tamlnsr of Helen.** Notice later. 

nc/f/Ha — '* Kesurrectlou.'* Blanche Walsh in an Interesting version 
of Tolstoi's sombre tale. 

WaUack's.—'' The Sultan of Sulu.'' Musical comedv. Funny and musical. 

Weber and /^W(/«>.— Burlesaue and vaudeville. Inexpeiienced \ 
sometimes attempt to buy good seats at the box office. 



LIFE 




329^ 

A Wedding. 

HE wedding was solemnized in 

a floating chapel bnilt for the 

occasion. This clever mse was 

made necessary by the bride 

having only limited divorces 

which did not x>ermit her to 

marry again anywhere except on the high 

sens, and also by the groom not daring to come 

within the jurisdiction of the courts of New 

York, 

His effulgence, the extremely right reverend 
liii^hopof the diocese, conducted the ceremony, 
and was never more felicitous. When he 
pronounced the benediction on the kneeling 
pair, the aristocratic congregation were 
deeply affected, and cheered loudly. The 
bishop thanked them feelingly in behalf 
of himself and Jehovah. 

During the ceremony the ushers passed 
highballs and cigarettes, a chic innova- 
tion especially welcomed by the younger 
women present, who were not accus- 
tomed to sitting so long without drinking 
or smoking. 

Another new feature was the Cake- 
walk recessional. When it was seen to 
what advantage this enabled the bride 
to display her exquisite lingerie, great 
surprise was expressed that nobody had 
thought of it before. 



THS T7. 8. SENATE IH SBMION. 




Vindication. 
\HE Korean merchant coming 
over to America to get idols 
made for his heathen cus- 



tomers is a thorough, albeit late 

vindication of Christianity against 

the aspersions of the Demetrius 

who persuaded the silversmiths of 

Ephesus that Paul's religion would 

hurt their business. 

We have no reason to feel ashamed 



of our religion, from the point of view 
of trade. Vastly more money has 
been made by Christians than by the 
adherents of any other religious 
system. 

A Mistake. 

AT BW ARRIVAL : I, sir, was a 
"*^^ Brigadier-Oeneral in the Amer- 
ican Army ! 

St. Peter : This is no place for 
political refugees. 




TRICK FOR TRICK. 

" ACH 1 DEB TBUFBL 1 BE TBIKK8 TO PLAT US 
0MB TKICK. rOB IP WE SHOOT HIM MOW, WB MUST 
DBSCBMD PITE THOUSAND PEBT TO GET HIS 
REMAINS.** 

'*LET us POOL HIM, BANS, BY NOT 8BOOTINO 
HIM AT all/* 



LIFE 




LIFE'S FASHIONS. 
WOBKINO C08TUMS FOB ▲ BUSSlAN PBA8ANT. 

A Drastic Measure. 



whnt do yoa call 'em * Lectures to P&rents ' ? — would 

jmtiirallj be enthusiastic about them. But, xnj dear, I 

tell you what I will do. I will, as yon suggest, 

take more of an interest in the kid. Perhaps 

I have been neglecting him." 

" But will your interest," said Mrs. Dimple- 
ton, " be the right kind? Tou know that un- 
- less a parent is carefully trained in our modem 
methods he is likely to do more harm than 
good." 

'* Well," said Dimpleton, ** in my coarse, un- 
natural, primitive way, I'll do the best I can. 
Bring the boy in here, and 1*11 stay home with 
him this afternoon and be a father to him, 
while you go and drink in culture and instruc- 
tion from the lecture platform — that fountain 
head of all wisdom." 

Edward, four years old, came toddling in with 
his nurse, who was instructed to put on her 
things and go with Mrs. Dimpleton, that she, 
too, might be inspired in the right direction. 
The carriage presently bowled away, and left 
behind — a fond father with a fell scheme, and 
a plastic-minded youngster, just waiting to be 

taught. 

• • • 

TDT and by, in the dusk of the afternoon, the 
"^ carriage came back. Mrs. Dimpleton, 
her face flushed with renewed enthusiasm, en- 
tered the house and ran upstairs to the 
nursery. 

An unusual and striking scene met her gaae. 

Dimpleton, with a huge cigar in his mouth, 
sat in the centre of the room, dealing the cards 
on a card table that he had brought up from 
the library. On the table, in two large stacks, 
were a lot of many-colored poker chips. On the 
other side of the table sat Edward, an expres- 
sion of infantile absorption on his innocent 
face, holding his hand, with intense interest, 



«« TTT^HAT do they do?" 
^ ' said Dimpleton. 
"What do they do!" re- 
peated Mrs. Dimpleton ; " why, 
they tell us parents just what 
we ought to know. I have 
always felt that you never 
realized the responsibility en- 
tailed upon you as a father. 
Tou are apparently so flippant 
and BO indifferent to it all. I 
spoke to the president of the 
club about you the other day, 
and she wished you would just 
come to one of our meeting^. 
She felt sure you would be 
awakened. Oh, — it was the 



last one, I mean — it was so ' 
inspiring." 

" What do you want me to 
do? " asked Dimpleton. ** Go 
there with you and listen to a 
lot of ridiculous gabble? Do 
men ever go ? " 

<*0h, yes," exclaimed Mrs. 
Dimpleton, " ihdeed they do 1 
And although they are not so 
numerous as the women, they 
take 9ucJi an interest in every- 
thing." 

Dimpleton laughed. 

<* I should imagine," he said, 
" that any idiot of a so-called 
man who would attend such — 




* MABT HAD A UTTLl ULXB. 



LIFE 



331 




'*olo8e to his chin/* as his fond father had 
instrncted him to, 

Mra« Dimpleton uttered a feminiue shriek 
of dismay* 

**0b, what ff^fl j'ou doing?" she 
gasped, 

** Beiug a parent to onr child/' said 
Dirapleton* '* Edward, say ' Damn/ '' 
"Dam/* lisped Edward. 
Mrs, Dimpletou, thoroughly horror- 
fitricken^ snatched up tb** boy and f ulded 
him to her breast. ** Are you mad? ** 
ebe exclaimed, 

"Not exactly/' said Dimpkton. 

'* This is only a little id^a of 

my own, I hope to tt^ach our 

* little son to play poker aod 

ewear fluently. At present 

his vtxsabulary is limited to the 

little word you have ht?ard, but 

in a few more aftemoQi:is I'll 

iimke an expert ont of him. 

Oive nie time I " 

His wife laughed hysterically. 

"Tou'll never have another 

chance t *^ she exelidmed. 

'*IIow can yon help yonr- 

t*elf 7 " aaid Dt mpleton. * ^ Yon 

trill go to these nicer intetest- 

ing parents* meetings, and I 

give yon my word ihat 

every time yon go I'U stay 

home and teach that kid 

Just wtmt I have been 

teaching him this after- 

DOQU." 

"Then III never go 

Dimpleton went over 
iiud patted his wife on the 
shoulder, 

'* Good for you 1 ** he said 
affectionately. ** My dear, 
there is one thing in the world 
more important for & mother to do than 
to attend a lecture to parents, and tJiat 
is, to stay home and protect her child 
from its father/* 



^'■6/''-^ 



7%t Ytnitfi/til, t^Ht Ptnuitnt ^vitof.* Toy wtu. a it rmnn op KMWVnt^a mm 

30M£ DAY I 

** TBS. ALL PLSAnUBEB Km).** 




BACK TO ASIA. 



LIFE- 





BOOK STRIKE BULLETINS. 

[From a Staff Correspondent.] 
Indianapolis, Ind., March 2. — (Special.) — An- 
other conference between the book operators and 
the book miners was held to-day. but no settlement 
was arrived at, and there is talk of asking Presi- 
dent Rooseyelt. who is a book miner himself as a 
side line, to arbitrate the dispute before the present 
distressing condltlooB become unbearable. Already 
the famine in historical novels has reached the 
point where It is impossible to buy them in ton lots, 
and people are purchasing by the bushel basket. 
In some parts of the country consumers are re- 
duced to the bituminous subscription books from 
the Conkeyville district. 

I visited to-day the home of a typical book 
miner, Mr. Booth Tarklngton. The poverty of the 
Interior was pathetic. I suppose the entire fur- 
nishings of this humble home could not have cost 
more than $10,000. I foimd the miner in a small 
room on the second floor, miserably furnished. 
There was really nothing in it except a few Oriental 
rugs, some mahogany chairs and tables, a few oil 
paintings, and a lot of bric-a-brac. I noticed a 
motto in a gold frame: 
"And so from hour to hour we write and write. 
And then from hour to hour write rot and rot; 
And thereby hangs a historical romance." 

"This is the best I can offer you." he said, 
handing me a fat 25-cent cigar, which I regarded 
suspiciously. "Take a seat on that divan." I did 
so, and we fell to discussing the book-mining situa- 
tion. 

"The position of the anthracite book miners has 
been misstated," said Mr. Tarklngton. "Our de- 



^p)H^fiS(H^ 



mands are for 15 per cent, of the gross selling 
price up to 50,000 tons, after which we demand 20 
per cent. The operators wish to cut us to 10 and 
15. We will not stand it. We will not mine an- 
other ton until our demands are acceded to. This 
is our final answer to the operators." 

"How about the poetry miners? Will they 
unite with you, as threatened?" 

"If a settlement Is not effected within forty- 
eight hours, we are assured that the poetry miners 
will suspend work in a body." 

Up to midnight the operators refused to give 
out a statement, but they are expected to yield. — 
Chicago Tribune. 

YAWCOB AND HIS DOG 
f 

And Tawcob, observing his dog Schnitzel, spake 
unto him as follows : "Tou vas only a tog, but I 
vish I vas you. Ven you go mit your bed in you 
shust dum round dree dimes und lay down. Ven 
I go mit my bed In, I haf to lock up der place und 
vind up der clock und pud der cat out und undress 
myselluf und my vrow vakes up und scolds, den 
der paby vakes up und cries und I haf to valk him 
mit der house around; den maybtf ven I gets my- 
selluf to bed it is dime to get up vonce more again. 
Ven you gets up mit your bed you shust strectch 
yourselluf, dig your neck a leedle und you vas up. 
I haf to light der fire und put on der kittle, scrap 
some mit my vlfe alretty und git myselluf break- 
fast. Tou blay mit der day all round und haf 
plenties of fun. I haf to vork all der day round 
und haf plenties of drubble. Ven you die you vas 
dead. Ven I die I haf to go to hell yet." 

— Boompernickel Blatter. 



EXCHANGE OF COMPLIMENTS. 

The village sexton, in addition to being grave- 
digger, acted as a stonecutter, house repairer and 
furniture remover. 

The local doctor, having obtained a more lucra- 
tive appointment in another county, employed the 
sexton to assist in his removal. 

When it came to settling up accounts the doctor 
deducted an old contra account due by the sexton. 
He wrote at the same time, objecting to the charge 
made for removing his furniture. 

"If this was steady, it would pay much better 
than gravedigglng." 

The sexton replied: 

" Indade, Ol wud be glad to ave a steady job; grave- 
dlggin' is very slack since you left." — Spare Mo- 
ments. 



V It has been said of the Southern darky that he 
has not always a clear idea as to property rights, 
but on some points it appears that he la not in the 
least hazy. 

An old colored man in the days "befo' de wah" 
was given one of his master's cast-off hats, which 
he wore with great pride. One Sunday his master 
met him coming home from a camp-meeting in a 
pouring rain, bareheaded and holding his hat under 
his coat. Later on the master questioned him Jo- 
cosely : 

"Why didn't you wear your hat, Jerry? Did 
you feel the need of cooling your head?" 

"You see it's like dis, sah," responded Jerry. 
"My head 13 yours, but my hat Is mine, and nachelly 
I feels like Uking care ob it, sah." — Youth's Com- 
panion. 



LiFK is for sale by all Newsdealers in Great Britain. The international News 
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Established 1823. 

WILSON 
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yon will be aetoniehed at its improvement, 
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THE EVER FASHIONABLE PERFUME Of 
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LIFE- 




E^gyptian 

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^x^ Norway- 

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These delightful and health-givins: cruises, 
upon the iMlatial twin-screw steamships, 

Prinzessin Viotoria Luise and Auguste Viotoria 

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For dates of departure to and 
from New York by the Hamburg- 
American Line's Twin-Screw 
Express and Passenger Steamers, 
in connection with above cruise, 
see regular Trans-Atlantic Sailing 
List. Through rates quoted on 
demand. 



PIR5T CRUI5B, 

Duration, 17 Days. 
Rates, $182.60 upward. 



SECOND CRUISE, 

Duration, 22 Days 
Rates, $150 upward. 



THIRD CRU15B, 

Duration, 16 Days. 
Rates, $102.50 upward. 



To Norway and the Korth 
Cape, leaviacr Hamlrarir June 
9, 1908, bj* croMag steamer 

FBmBBSDr ViCTOBIA LUUB. 

To Norway, the North Cape, 
and Spitsbergen , leaTlnflr New 
York June 18, igos, by steamer 
AUOU8TB ViCTOBIA, but crulso 
begins at Hamburg Jnly Ist 

To Norway and the North 
Cape, learing Hamburg July?, 
1903, by cruising steamer PBQf- 

VXCTOBIA LUISB. 



FOURTH CRUISE, 

Duration, 22 Days. 
Rates, $200 upward. 



FIFTH CRUI5E, 

Duration, 28 Days. 
Rates. $200 upward. 



To Norway, the North Cape, 
and Spitsbergen, by twin* 
screw cruising steamer Prdi- 
nssni VicToaiA Luns, learlng 
Hamburg July 28, 1903L 
To Norway, Sweden, Bos- 
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twin-screw cruising steamer 
pRimaesBiir Victoria Lttisx, 
leaving Hamburg August 23, 
1903. 

Special pamphlets, containing full descriptions of the above trips, will be sent 

upon application to the " 

HAMBURG-AMERICAN LINE 

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LIFE- 



gNTEMPO 




"Come along," said Mr. Nupop, fresh from bis 
Interview with the janitor, ** we*U have to look at flats 
elsewhere." 

"But why can't we take this?" demanded Mrs. 
Nupop. "It's like heaven here, and " 

"Not much it isn't ; and that's the trouble. 
They take children in heaven." — PhiUidelphia Press. 

ELECTRIC-LIGHTED TRAIN TO CALIFORNIA. 
The Overland Limited is a solid through fast train leav- 
ing Chicago daily at 8:00 P. M. for San Francisco, leas than 
tbree days en route, via the Chicago ft North- Western, 
Union Pacific and Southern Pacific Railways. Its superb 
equipment Includes buffet and smoking cars (barber and 
batb), compartment, observation and dining cars, electric 
reading lamps In every berth, telephone and Booklovers' 
library. The best of everything. Two other fast trains 
leave Chicago lOHX) A. M. and 11:30 P. M. dally. 

^ Sib Richard Powell, the eminent English 
physician, is noted for his frankness in speaking 
his mind without regard to the social position of 
his patient. Once, when he was called to prescribe 
for the Duchess of Manchester, he ordered her to 
disrobe. "But. Sir Richard, I haven't my maid 
here," she . said ; to which the baronet retorted : 
"Madame, I have no Intention of examining your 
maid." — Argonaut, 

"Don't you think that elections could be con- 
ducted without the use of money?" 

"Of course they could," answered Senator Sor- 
ghum ; "but it would be impossible to guarantee the 
result." — Waahington Star. 

HOTEL VENOOME. BOSTON. 
All the attractions of hotel life, with the com- 
forts and privacy of home. 

It ifl told of Bishop Williams, of Connecticut, 
for many years Presiding Bishop of the Episcopal 
Church in America, who lived all his life a bach- 
elor, that he was talking one day with a young 
man from the West about a tax a Western State 
was trying to Impose on bachelors, the tax to be 
increased a certain per cent, for every ten years 
of bachelorhood. ."Why, Bishop." said the young 
man. "at your age you would have to pay about 
$100 a year." 

"Well," said the Bishop, quietly, and in his old- 
time vernacular, "it's wuth it." — New York Tribune. 

"It's almost impossible, dear, te lease a Jiouse 
for a shorter term than one year nowadays," he 
said, "so, to protect myself, I must ask you " 

"Ask me what?" Interrupted his bride-to-be. 

"To agree not to seek a divorce until the ex- 
piration of the first year's lease."— Cat?u>I{c Stand- 
ard and Times. 

If you desire a valuable Champagne, send to your 
dealer for a case of Oook^i Imperial Extra Dry. 

Thbt tell this story of Lord Charles Beresford 
and Sir Frederick Treves, the King's physician: 

V>rd Charles fell ill, and Sir Frederick was 
called to his bedside. "Tell me," said Sir Fred- 
erick, "your symptoms." 

The other said he had a pain here, an ache 
there, and a stiffness somewhere else. And to 
each of these announcements the physician ex- 
claimed, chuckling delightedly: 

"Excellent !" 

"Charming!" 

"Splendid !" 

When Lord Charles had concluded the enumer- 
ation of his troubles. Sir Frederick slapped him 
heartily upon the back, and cried in a bold, gay 
voice : 

"My dear fellow, let me congratulate you! 
You have the rarest disease of the century. Tou 
'ou lucky dog. a disease that heretofore was 
o be extinct." — New York Tribune. 





a Million 
Barrels a Year 



Those are sales of Schlitz Beer 

making it the leader of all Milwaukee beers, by far. 
That's a result of maintaining absolute 
purity. We doubled the necessary cost of our 
brewing to have Schlitz Beer right. 

The Result Is 

A Million Barrels a Year 

We have used the best materials —the finest barley 

—paid as high as twice what we need pay for hops. 

We bored six wells to rock to get p ire water. 

We kept our brewing as clean as your cooking. 

The Result Is 

A Million Barrels a Year 

We filtered all the air that touched the beer. 
We filtered the beer through white vood pulp. 

We aged it until it could not caus( biliousness. 

We sterilized every bottle after it was sealed. 

The Result Is 

A Million Barrels a Year • 

Isn't Schlitz Beer —pure oeer— worth 
asking for, when the cost is the 
same as of common beer? 

Ask for the Brewery Bottling. 





WE CUIM 
THAT 



OLD CROW RYE 



IS BEST— 
BECAUSE 



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It is sold straight It brings the distiller far more price 

than any other made in the United States. 
It is hand made, sour mash, and has the best reputation. 
Our Scotch Whiskies are true Glenlivets ; are sold straight 
The Souvenir is old. 
The Bonnie Brier Bush is very old. 
Compare them with any others. 



•LIFE- 



" taflNAUD'S 







#toteT w 

_JltlfW«CS — \ ^ 



TOURS 

TO THS 

PACIFIC COAST, 



Via Pennsylvania Railroad, Account 
Presbsrterian General Assembly. 

For the General Assembly of the Presbvterian 
Church, at Los Angeles, Cal., May. 21 to June 2, 
the Pennsylvania Railroad Company will run 
three personally-conducted tours to Los Aneeles 
and the Pacific Coast. These tours will teave 
New York and Philadelphia May 12 and 13. 
Tour No. 1, coverinff twenty-four days, $134.60 
from New York; $132.75 from Philadelphia. 
Tour No. 2, covering forty-three days, including 
Yellowstone Park, $253 from New York and 
$251.25 from Philadelphia. Tour No. 3, covering 
thirty days, including Grand Canyon of Arizona, 
$159 from New York and $156.75 from Philadel- 
phia. Proportionate rates from other points. 
Arrangements may be made to return independ- 
ently on Tours No. 1 and No. 3. 

Special Pullman trains will be used, and the 
services of a tourist agent, chaperon, baggage 
master, and official stenographer will be provided 
on each train. 

For itinerary giving rates and full information 
apply to Tourist Agent, 263 Fifth Avenue, New 
York City, or Qeo. W. Boyd, Assistant General 
Passenger Agent, Broad Street Station, Phila- 
delphia, Pa. 




fl ^w. 



fi 



ABBOIlSoRicfNAl 

Angostura Bitters. 



:m; .A. 3P Xj E -\^7- O O 3D 

NEAR CINCINNATI, OHIO. 

A Saiiatorinni estebUshed In 1875 for the pitrateoare and medical 

freMiKent of Druff and Alcoholic Addiotiona. Thoaaaoda 

haTlng failed elaewhere hare been cored by oa Home Tr««t- 

mentlf Dealred. Addrea 

TBB Db. J. L. B i aPHM a Go., Dep. 77, loAiioir, O. 



Reduced Rates to New Orleans 

via Pennsylvania Railroad, account meeting Na- 
tional Manufacturers' Association. $37.50 for the 
round trip from New York. Tickets on sale April 
11, 12 and 13, good going on date of sale, and 
good returning to reach New York not later than 
April 19. By depositing tickets with joint agent 
at New Orleans between April 12 and 19, and pay- 
ment of fee of 50 cents, an extension of final return 
limit may be obtained to reach New York not 
later than April 30. Proportionate rates from 
other points. 



Richard Bennett 

TAILOR 

Riding, Driving, Qtif Soitt, Unifornt and LIvtrItt 
Importer tf Fine Wooltnt 

Fine Shirts a Specialty 
206 and 208 Broadway, New Tork 

EVENINQ POST BUILDINQ 



THE MARKET IS FLOODED with 
cheap Mineral Waters of uncertain 
and . varying composition and doubtful 
purity. To avoid all possibility of mistake 
insist on having only CARL H. 
SCHULTZ'8. Send for illustrated 
pamphlet. 

CARL H. SCHULTZ. 

Telephone OoDneotion. 480444 First At., N. T. 



Express Charges Prepaid to any Point 

One correspondent writes : " I live way out here in Seattle— do you really mean that you will 
pay all the charges ? ' * We do. Of course, we lose money on some orders by this offer, but we 
are safe on the average. We will also refund your money and fay the return charges if, after 
thirty nights* free trial, you do not find 

The Ostermoor Patent $~i fe^ 
Elastic Felt Mattress, JLO» 

equal in cleanliness, durability and comfort to any $50 hair mattress ever made. You can get your money 
back by return mail — '* no questions asked." There will be no unpleasantness about it at all. About 
ten have come back in over four years. 

Our ja-Page Book «« The Test of Time " Mailed Free 

to any one who applies, whether you desire to buy a mattress or simply gratify an idle curiosity* 



BEWARE I There is not a single 
store in the country that can sell our 
mattress; almost every store now 
has an imitation so-called " felt " 
which is kept in stock to s«ll on our 
advertising. Our name and guar- 
antee on every renuine mattress. 
Can only be bought from us direct. 



All 

a ii 



a feet 6 inches wide, 25 lbs., $ 8.35' 

3 feet wide. 30 lbs., • 10.00 
3feet6incne8 wide, 35ilM., 11.70 

4 feet wide. 40 IIm. , - ■3>35 
4feet6lnclie8wlde, 45ilM., 15.00 

Made in two paru 50 cenU extra. 

These prices include exprtu ckarftt. 



OSTERMOOR & CO., 114 Elizabeth St., New York. 

We have ctishioned 2$fioo Churches. Send for our book " Church Cushions." 
Canadian AddiMi, 801 St. James St., MontrML 




Trade Xark 



LIFE 



|Tlie(ireat$l«,OMPieceofMosic 

HUWATHA 

A Sixty-Cent Piece. 

Our price 30c. 
If not procurable of 
your dealer, aeod na 

25c. 




Tittopnf* of •BfatMOa.** 



HIAWATHA — AbK>lat». 
ly the mott beauUful, the 
nuMt pnu.'tlcahle, and aJ- 
torether tbe catohieat 
pfeoe of InatniineotaJ mu- 
■to erer wHtten. Eamr to 
pb^r^Makea aa ezoeOent 

Z«AZAa&S-.WaltBea By 
STb. Blanke. Briffhtl 
■mooth, Tery pretty. 

OIiOBIKDA^By Chann- 
ceyHaiaea ▲ perfect two- 
atep I ffreat. 

WUBN* KMIOHTHOOD 
WAS iNjriiOWXB- 
WattMa One of our beat 

BIZIBLAKD-Xareh 
two«(ep bj Halaea. An> 
other o^ hie maaterpieoea 

OBOII«IA WAIiTZXB — 
Oar lateat. written In a 
tuneful and popular Tein. 

DIZia OI air>lfareh two- 
st<-p. Bt Lampe. oom- 
poeer of '^Creole Bellea'' 

OUBAirOIiA— A Spanidi 
danoe. Ihpeclally good t 
eaay toplay. 

OORDXIiIA-llareli two- 
•tep. la aa mnakml aa ila 



each, for any one in tha 
list, except Hiawatha. 

$1.00 

for any six, inclnding 
Hiawatha. 



'HXAra 80UTHXRN 
8KIS»-lCarch vwo^topi 
Irredatlble, bright. iSe 
melody ia very catchy. 

8UNKT BUBAH-March 
two4(tep. Very bright and 
oachy. Suretopleaae. 




Sr^ok^SSK 




Ij^^AftES^LLROADS S^abofH^ 



GEO. N. PIERCE CO., ^^^l^J^ 

Pierce Motorcttes and Arraw Mator Can 



BMOKT- TOPAZ-March 
iwoi«tep. A Tei7 catchy 
number. 

n ANGBZKA — WaltaM. 
By Blaake. Beautiful, 
BrflUant, ICelodloua 

OUB DIBBOTOBB- 
A oompoattlon of unnauAl 
rli In atralght march 

=,ifi«Bieeippi 

- BBIjB— Vmt catchy, 

oharaeterlfltlc march two- 

■tep. 

HBABT8 OOTTBA- 

OBOUB^Waltaea By the 



composer of 
XT PBBAX ULDT- 

March. The opening itralna 

attract at once. 
OBBOLB BBXiLXB- 

llarahtwo-etep. Thetnne 

that makee people happy. 
DOXiOBBB-A Cuban 
"the oompoeer of 



a,bTthc 

kwatha." 

POPULAR AND PLEASINQ SONQS. 

** Tke Satmi «imI tk* Simmer" (m SMrad story mmg); *' mmwmMMm " 
(words Mt to ibe popoler 9lOMi InterniesM Itj Jiudm O^Dtm^iuat 
U). 'To-Mgk^'^(Xml.»A^' hfttlMNo Other ii^l^Tal!^^^ 



JW^ "(bellad). 8pMe do«a Botpennlt dcMTlptJea of each dm. 
h). eecb, or any ono iaclad«l Id oor 6for aLOO offer. 



S6e. eecb, or any ono iaclad«d Id oor 6 for 

The Oreat Whitnay- 
Ijtaad id meadoUn, indter. 



iiy-Wamar XaadoUn'ooUectlon , 
u* ■«<■ •«■ lUBHuwuu, KuJtar, piano accomp. Each book ISo Tha 
ffreatoci maadoUa oolleetloa pvt»li«hod. Ikm't fl^l to ««fc- fbr 
our iUuatratad catalogue IVaa. «^ »" w uaK lor 

TK WMTNEY-WAIMER PUBUSHMG COMPANY 
276-278 Woodward Ave. > . Detfh, Mich, 




Automobile Homw 



M&M 



Snmnier Cottage 



Portable Houses 

ar« prucifrnl^ act^umt'Iy bullt^ ^v^y trhnt^Ktnnl^ nnltable 
tortuty ciUttAta- A\n\ c« n In- eirctod In a dnj. 

Tht' *♦ I nU S vn( fm '» of f (jtuftnutlonprpraUt tbrougb- 
mit Ein rl t V f FT pniii- II A 1 nti-rr h^ngv&blcL »u nalin rajnhed— 
no cflLipeDlens. All tEu^trutrclcniA af« ftntdehed^ 

No Experience Needed to Erect 

Thfs« hfinwa ap« pcrft^t tn conrfrucdou ; ^vrlnd uid 
^TKOT proof; aflmimbJT o^lflpt*^] to uunt erenr 
Tvijuln^rrK'Ht ; rmnnipcital nod rMBOtabtir' in prirc, 

f>Qr!<uii4'rh fai-llltlt^ ATkd autoni&tJ4^ mnchVnery enable ua 
todi-UTorth^-*9 Tioqdi'ia, rtsady t^i erect on inX'mixn, at local 
pHcci < vi niju . TisX nJone. 

SUMHCR COTTAGTS-AUIOMOeiLC HOUSES 
CHlLDltfltf^S PUVHOt'SrS-Hl^TER^S CABINS 



Write at ouLt fur cutalnfuti And prk-uti. ^iriAa Jourii.„„„ 
^<ttail and we wUl fumiah you with full information. 

0NaM0«LEYC0.,900Bfoodwoy,Sogfciow,Micli. 



bears the seal of 
universal approval. 



For rich, healing lather, convenience 
and elegance of style it is peerless. 

Price, Twemty.Jivt Cemtt, of aU Dmgiistt. 
TUB J. B. WILUAMS CO.. Qlastoiilwry, Ct. 

tOMDOM PAJllS DRBSDIN SYDMaY 



Redflced Rates to New Orleans 

▼ia PennsylTanU Railroad, account meeting 
American Medical Association. $87.60 for 
the round trip from New York. Ticketa on 
sale May 1, 2 and 8. Good going on date of 
sale, and good returning to reach New York 
not later than 10 days from date of sale. By 
depositing ticket with Joint agent at New 
Orleans between May 1 and 12, and pay- 
ment of 50 cents, an extension of final return 
limit may be obtained to reach New York 
not later than May 80. Proportionate rates 
from other points. 



LARK s 



NORWAY, 

Sweden^ Russia 

Th(^mo f.l, a way to visit these 

intr n^sEJug < oujiirii- iHofi*ered byoarJaly 

2c! I riiise of 42 duva on the populsr 

Ll'^vtl <'xi.ri-(« Ptoaiiier " KAISERIN," 

I speciatly churtered for oar party. 

RATES, 8226rf AND UP. 

All Decenary ezpemet inelnded. fiend for 
illustrated programme. Programmes ready for 
various EttropMui toars rangiiig from $210 

•«>•*»• FRANK C. CLARK, ^ 
I 111 Broadway, NBW YORK* 

» 9 Staf »tt BOBTON. J 



Dedication St loflis Expositiofl 



p EDUCED Rates via Pennsylvania Rail- 
*^ road. $24.25 for the round trip from 
New York to St. Louis. Tickets on sale 
April 26, 27, 28, 29, good going only on date 
sold and good to return until May 4, on being 
executed by the joint agent at St. Louis, for 
which no fee will be required. Proportion- 
ate rates from other points. 



G0U1 & RHEUMATISM 



c« Ou G r oatEngHihRemedyl 

BLAIR'S PILLsl 

Safe, Sura, [ffacUv*. gOc 4 St I 




mi 



;R.ec\iperaLte at: 



Atlantic Otyl 

Get away from your desk and the worries of the office and enjoy the bracing 
salt air and exhilarating: salt baths at 

The Chalfonte 



BEACH FRONT. 



CENTRAL LOCATION. 



LIFE 



The Backbone of the Revo- 
lution Jn the Ale industry is 




VANS 




It has given e^le new fame 
eind made a new chapter in 
a.le history. 



\uon6bxvw CAJ^Ca 

Upholstery. 
Summer Curtains and Coverings, 

Rumod lltuliti, Lac« And Cojonsd Madraii 
SwlM« BliisUn anf] Liice BodnpraulB, 

tamJUtt Ui ftttj tlltdnlred, 

Umptry Silk, BnicK' R^ugAi unci Prliit«<| 

M<>r( jjTlm' htilks ffir H4n]i Cortftlii*. 

Ligbt Ilrupenu? and Fiuaj Filluwft. 

CrproatiM AJ)d Prlnteil Unf^nm 

m Jjupi vu-iecy qf new, Atrtttctlve nud dulnUito 

IwttemA, ftalijtbli? for htidrootna And 

boudolri In couiitry liug«efi. 

Hotel and Y*cht Upholatery Work* 

EtUmaUM on tippiU^ian. 

NEW YORK. 



Ej:ira Drs. 



BruU 



Du-mi-ny 

The highest type 
of French Chaiiupugiia 

OiDXAN & HALL Ca„ i^fti, Hoatoh, lLia«. 



'^ff'^^frr smt/ine spring iu fari iesi vhtf pays " 

OLD POINT COMFORT, VIRQINIA 

HOTEL 
CHAMBERLIN 

Thr mtrti mai^Snceiiitj itUuate^] isd comfort*b|v 
f ami ihed i) otel cin 1 1» u A I lam I e Com t . UolqmUn Cn U 
atEft, Scrvicir, *n<i Appoint men («, 

^•r| it«iiofiibl« Ril«i. Vifj Superior Accoifim<HS«(i(tni 

OHOEIGE F- 4DAns, Ulcer. 

^lew ?«% ftookinq Oflk4f» 289 f nurih Awnue, Second 

neor. li$1«p|ione I749-I8th 

|3f~Wrtt« for Bookk't. Nfiw niaisugnmeut 1903 
Golf ibe Year "Bound 



PI6 [bm& AgWI^EtSAfiBS 



a^::- 




Prvpritior : A mam cams iff AKn AtltiD wncTsriH i had jutt oooi> pi«, ho t M«ti>Lr 
pt^irwrin ro thb sion. 

'* WPAT THENf ^' 

" WHY, Ei ttKJlC SnOKTC4tl/^ 





Every thorouKhbiTd jrolfer unites the two by play- 
it] g the !asI bole of the match for a w^e Qippie of 

lDewar'8 Scotch 

the Whisky which has fcxtti awarded 5jg<ild aod prite 
mtd.tfs. ami isi siipplie^l bf Royal Warrant to His 



C.OLF PRINT 

vnlltlrrl "Tbf Utf* Holft for l)F»AT'i" < CO[trH|rl3tt. 1W«*. liT ftTiU 

t-y Jtimi^ J*7wti.ni, i>)hPim bamfm. will be mwletl io Uijott*.^ on 
fiit-pjpt (if tt-ii ct'fjtji Id sU'rfrt'^ It im printtHl In foyr rotore on limry 
JApfLa Tcllnpi, txi^ and 1» mltel^lp fnr frAniJn? kn flub hv^u^ nr 

DHnVfpettlcb fc*r iLit iiri iMlr>ni!i^ In Itay wi" irflf ^br»w i fAftctxTiur 
«Mii« bff^ Edtfurct l-mm Id, Vor eopii* t-l thisi print addfrm 

FREDERICK GLASS UP 
126 Bleccker Street, New York 



LIFE 



April 9,1911 




Axitomobite^ 



have been in successful service since 1895. The latest models 
are a result of eight years steady and consistent attention to 
development and improvement in the largest and best equipped 
automobile factory in the world, and are unequaled for effi- 
ciency, durability, perfection of details and elegance of finish. 

COLllBU 24-H. F. (lASOLENE T01IRIN6 CAR 



MArk XLI. 




Everywhere admitted to be the most perfect gasolene car yet devised. 
Seats six persons. New and exclusive features throughout. All parts of 
engine and transmission gear instantly accessible. All operating parts 
interchangeable. Igniting plugs and valves removable without tools. 
Speeds four to forty-five miles per hour. Minimum of vibration and noise. 
Finest body work and furnishings ever seen on an automobile. 

Trice^ - ^5^000 

COLUMBU U6HT EEaRIC RUNABOUT 

Ne.rk XXXVIIL 




One of the sensations of the New York and Chicago Shows. Most con- 
venient, fastest and handsomest Electric Runabout in the 1903 market. 
Battery and motor beneath the floor, leaving entire body space available 
for luggage. Low center of gravity gives great steadiness and splendid 
riding qualities. Two brakes. Five speeds up to fifteen miles per hour. 
Forty miles on one charge of battery. 

Trice^ - ^900 



ELECTRIC BROUGHAMS, HANSOMS, COUPES, 
CABRIOLETS, TONNBAUS, SURREYS, VICTORIAS, 
RUNABOUTS, SPECIAL SERVICE WAGONS, 
BUSSES, WAGONETTES, DELIVERY WAGONS, 
TRUCKS, PATROL WAGONS, AMBULANCES ^ ^ 

CaUlog m Mid full iafbrflMtioii will be teat on ra^na rt 

electric Vehicle Company 

HARTFORD. CONN. 

V YORK SALESROOMS, Wot 39th St., opp. Metropolltaa Opwa H.n*e 
BOSTON, 43 ColuailMM Ave. CHICAGO, I4>i Mkhlgaa Ave. 




Life Insurance 

Free from AU 

Speculative 

Features. 



The 



Travelers 
Insurance 
Company 

Hartford «Coiin. 

S.C.OVNHAM. 

President. 



Accident Insurance 

latlm 

Oldest, Larg'est 
and Stron^st 

Accident Company 

in the World. 



There are some 

Eye Openers 

in Accident Insurance Polides 
Just placed on the market by 

The 

Travelers Insurance 
Company 

They are something new, and 
there is nothing now offered that 
can touch them in LIBERAL- 
ITY, in INCREASED BENE- 
FITS, in SIMPLICITY. 

And the same old security 
grown larger, that makes THE 
TRAVELERS* contractt the 
most widely popular among 
solid business and professional 
men, is behind them. 

Agents in every town. Write 
us for details. 



OtX tUhSi^-p 



VOLUME XLI. 



NEW YORK, APRIL 16, 1903. 

Entered at the New Tork Poet Office as Seoond-ClMs MaU Matter. 
Oopjrlgbt, 1002, by Life Pitblibhtno OoMPAinr. 



r 

NtJMBER 1068. 




G, 0, P,: I LOVK THIS TOY THE BEST OF ALL. 



COPYRIOMT row ONKAT SIIITAIM •¥ JAMI 
UNOKR THK ACT Or %Wi. 



LIFE 




24 H. P. GASOLINE 



TOURING CAR. ^^* 



XLI 



Leading faults of gasoline automobiles hitherto have 
been noise and excessive vibration in ninning, and diffi- 
culty of access to parts in need of repair or adjustment. 
To overcome these faults and at the same time to gain 
greater efficiency, reliability and usefulness, have been 
chief aims in the development of our Mark XLI. Touring 
Car. Exhaustive practical tests under all conditions of 
travel have demonstrated the complete attainment of 
these objects. 



The engine, of entirely new design, has four 
5-inch vertical cylinders and develops 26 actual 
brake H.P. All lines of strain upon the frame are 
about the axis of the main shaft. An important 
feature is the method of taking out and replacing 
the bodily removable igniting plugs and inlet and 
exhaust valves. 

All of the plugs and valves may be removed 
and replaced In a few moments without use of a 
wrench or tools of any kind. 



Operating parts interchangeable. All bolts and 
screws have standard threads. New Eisemann magneto 
system and auxiliary battery. Sliding gear transmission. 
Through drive on high gear. Speeds 4 to 45 miles 
per hour. Improved clutch; no shock to vehicle or 
undue friction. Carbureter gives constant mixture for 
all speeds. New form of steering; perfect control with 
no lost motion. Two sets of double-acting brakes inter- 
acting with clutch. 



Our new catalogue will be mailed on request. 

In print and in illustration this is the most artistic 
book of its kind ever issued. The pictures and de- 
scriptions cover the entire line of Columbia auto- 
mobiles, including Electric Runabouts, Victorias, 
Phaetons, Surreys, Tonneaus, Cabriolets, Coupes, 
Broughams, Hansoms, Busses, Special Service and 
Delivery Wagons, Trucks, and the 24 H.P. Gasoline 
Touring Car. 




COLUMBIA GASOLINE TOURING CAK. MARK XLI 




CHASSIS — SIDE VIEW 




CHASSIS —TOP VIEW 




THE ENGINE 



LECTRic Vehicle company 



U A 



York Salesroom : 134-136-138 West 39tli StreO 

Opposite Metropolitan Opera House 



LIFE 






•'Wa.'i-OGE, V, 





342 



LIFE 




' ' H'hiie there is Li/e there's Hope.'* 

VOL. XLl. APRIL 16, ig08. No. 1068. 

10 Wnr THiRTT-PiRar 8t., New Yoke. 



Published ererj TaaradaT- ••V.OO a year in ad> 
▼auoe. Poeta^e to foreifni countries In the Posul 
Union, I1.U4 ■ year extra. Hlnsle current copip*. 
10 cents. Back nnmbedra, after three mouttis from 
date of publication. 25 c<'nts. 

A/o contrtbuttoH unit be returned unless' 
accompanied by stamped and addressed 
enveiope. 

The illustrations in L.UF: are copyrighted, 
and are not to be reproduced. 

Frompt notification should be sent by sub' 
scribers of any change of address. 




LDrofes- 

SOR 
WORTMAN 

of Yale 
bici ks that the 
tethod of de- 
elopment of 
lonkcjrs into men 
'Q^ Bomething 
ikt- this: The 
LOU keys began 
life in the north 
uf Enrope and Asia 
wheti that part of 
tbe earth was 
tropical. They 
i^o flourished and developed 
' f' there as monkeys, bnt as 
the North grew cold, they 
migrated southerly, receding farther 
and farther as the cold drove them, 
until finally some of them brought up 
in the i>eninsulas which reach south- 
erly from Asia and Europe. Then they 
could go no farther, bnt the climate, 
even down there, was not tropical, and 
existence became a serious problem to 
them. They had to come down out of 
the trees they had been used to live in, 
and dwell on the earth. They had to 
find new food — fish, nuts and ground 
fruit, instead of the tree fruit they 
had relied on. A change of diet 
brought a change of structure. They 
were crowded along by necessity, until 
finally it became a question whether 
they should give up being monkeys or 
give up living. Some died ; others 
dropped off their tails, perfected them- 
selves in perpendicular locomotion, 
caught the trick of striking fire, and 
set up as men. They had to, or quit. 
It was root -hog -or -die. with them. 



Those who were driven south on the 
American hemisphere were never ao 
hard put to it. They got down into 
South America, the climate suited 
them, food was abundant and they did 
not have to make a special effort to 
live. The consequence was that the 
South American monkeys did not climb 
up in the social scale, but continued to 
be low-grade monkeys as they are to- 
day. 




T T looks as though the tropical coun- 
-*- tries of South America, including 
more or less of Central America, were 
no more conducive to progress in men 
than in monkeys. Consider Vene- 
zuela, that being the country most 
under our observation just now. Ac- 
cording to the best accounts we get, 
its government is a despotism of suc- 
cessive scalawags. The biggest rascals 
seem to govern. There is a constitu- 
tion, but it does not work ; there are 
republican forms, bnt there is no life 
in them. One dictator after another 
rules according to his whim ; plunders 
till he gets his fill, robn the foreign 
trader, shoots the native protestant, 
and finally, when things get too hot, 
runs away to Paris, where a huge for- 
ttme awaits him. This kind of thing 
has been going on in Venezuela for 
generations. There is no liberty there ; 
no security for person or property. 
The country cannot be developed, and 
things are getting — not better— but 
worse. North, in Mexico, Diaz has 
made a nation ; South, in Chili and 
Argentina, where the climate is colder, 
there is true government and prosper- 
ity. But in the equatorial oountries 
things are going ill indeed. 




T>RESIDENT ROOSEVELT lec- 
■^ tured to the people of Chicago the 
other day on the Monroe Doctrine, and 
asked them to increase the navy. No 
doubt he will have much to say on the 
same subject during his Western trip. 
Very well . Most of us approve the Mon- 
roe Doctrine and are ready to back it, 
and are prepared to assent to a reason- 



able accumulation of warships to punc- 
tuate our feelings. But meanwhile what 
is to become of equatorial South Amer- 
ica ? How long is it to lie idle 7 How 
long is it to be pillaged by scoundrels 
and ravaged by revolutions? How 
long are its decent people to be shot 
and its helpleM people oppressed? 
Dealing with such a creature as Castro 
is represent^'d to be is absurd, yet he is 
all the government Venezuela has. 
They need new blood down there. 
They have no New England to breed 
hardihood. And Brazil, too, though 
not such a scandal, is ill off. The 
whole of tropical South America is a 
problem. The world needs its re- 
sources. How are they to be devel- 
oped ? The Monroe Doctrine will work 
well for the protection of autonomy 
that is progressive. It saved Mexico 
to the Mexicans, and that was worth 
while. But it cannot, for an indefinite 
time, protect anarchy and retrogres- 
sion. Some kind of decent government, 
not inconsistent with it, must come to 
Venezuela and all the tropical Ameri- 
can countries that are in a like case. 





iiiM 



n^HERE has been an enormous in- 
crease of rich young men in this 
country of recent years. Every month 
— almost every week — some laborious 
person, who haa devoted himself to 
money-making, lets go his hold, and 
leaves a huge fortune to be divided 
among his heirs. Judging from the at- 
tention the newspapers lavish on these 
heirs, public interest in them is acute. 
There are a great many millionaires in 
the country, nowadays, who are less 
than thirty five years old. They are 
worth watching. It is not worth while 
piling up a big for time by such 
means as most huge fortunes are piled 
up, unless it is going to be an advan- 
tage to one's descendants. Mr rely to 
keep one*s descendants fat and cheer- 
ful is a doubtful advantage. As long 
as the European monkeys continued 
fat and cheerful they continued to be 
monkeys. How about our crowd of 
young millionaires ? Are they getting 
to be men, or are they growing tails? 



LIFE 



343 




C9nn§kt, 190S, Up Hf9 PubtUMng 6a 



A HAPPY FACULTY. 



Youny Tutter (to Hostess) : i hatb had a vehy plbasamt evbnixo. bct thsk i always v amagv to bnjot 

MTSELr, NO MATTER WHERE 1 AM. 



344 



LIFE 



To Spring. 

TpXHAUSTLESS fount of poesy, O Spring, 
-^ Thou art Love's rival in the realm of rhyme : 

Thou art the vision and the voice sublime 
That wake in melody on pipe and string. 
Thou art the season and the seasoning 

Of song, perpetually pure and prime ; 

Thou art the daughter, best beloved of Time, 
Who makest man to dream, to love and sing ! 

For thee doth Flora with her fragrant train 
Of blossoms dance along the hill and dale 
And light their jewel lamps in vine and tree. 
Thy beauty thou dost robe in sun and rain, 
But once when thou did^t draw aside thy veil 
I saw Myrtilla who is Spring for me ! 

Frank Dempster Sherman, 

A Literary Episode. 
"D Y the Ramparts of Jezreel but Tito shall never cut The 
-^ Six Trees that grow On Satan's Mount ! Youth he 
may have, but The Things That Are Csesar's must keep 
out of The Pit. The Kiss of Glory, given by Lady Rose's 
Daughter, was spumed by Soltaire, but The Oaptain and 
The Whaleman's Wife, with Hearts Ck)urageous, made up 
because they were of The Better Sort. Questionable 
Shapes were exposed in The Confessions of a Wife, but 
The Observations of Mr. Dooley precipitated The Crisis, 
and Mrs. Wiggs led Lovey Mary into The Cabbage Patch 
where she captured The Chameleon For A Maiden Brave. 

Joe Cone, 

Child Study. 
/^NE hundred children were handed each a hot iron. 
^^ Thirty- three boys and eighteen girls said ** Ouch ! ** 
Twenty -five girls and ten boys said ** Ooch ! " 

Of the girls who said " Ouch 1 " seven had pug-noses and 
one toed in 
Thirteen boys born of foreign parents said "Ooch I " 
The conclusions to be drawn from this interesting ex- 
periment will be embodied in a book and published in the 
Practical Science Series. 




jjmerican Diplomacy in the Orient, by John W. Foster, 
combines in a most unusual degree the qualities of a 
valuable book of reference, of a succinct history and of a 
readable narrative written in a delightful style. The 
author's long diplomatic career and his standing as a 
writer alike lend weight to this work, the only weakness 
of which is a slight bias toward patriotic optimism. 
(Houghton, Miflin and Company. $3.00.) 

Two rather suggestive side-lights are thrown upon the 
question of plagiarism by recent books. The charges 
against Mrs. Ward in regard to Lady Bose's Daughter and 



the public verdict of their irrelevance is one instance. A 
book by Edna Kenton called Wfiai Manner of Man (Bowen- 
Merrill Company, Indianapolis) , which shows what a x)Oor 
thing William Black might have made of A PrineeAts of 
Thule, is another. The truth is that plagiarism by a genius 
is a compliment; by a bungler it is a joke ; it is only a 
crime when perpetrated by an equal. 

Hotc to Attra^^t the Birds is the title of another " nature 
book " by Netje Blanohan. It contains a very little about 
attracting the birds and a great deal of graceful talk com- 
pounded of natural history, poetical assumption and bird 
stories. The illustrations match the text, being partly 
photographs from life, partly from stuffed specimens and 
partly fakes. (Doubleday, Page and Company. $1.35.) 

Benjamin Swift must have hugely enjoyed writing a 
book called In Piccadilly, and those who catch the author's 
spirit will enjoy it with him. It is a contemptuous satire 
of English society and society literature, but the story is 
told with so perfectly straight a face that the reader feels 
that he and the author have the joke all to themselves. 
(G. P. Putnam's Sons.) 

Mr. Hervey White, under cover of an attempt to amuse 
the youngsters, has written a very clever imaginary de- 
scription of a baby's first impressions of the world. He 
calls his book Noll and the Fairies and does not let on that 
he is discussing some mooted questions of philosophy. 
(Herbert S. Stone and Company, Chicago.) 

How to Sing is a volume by Lili Lehman, the well-known 
vocal teacher, devoted to what one might call the physical 
mechanics of song. It is illustrated by physiological dia- 
grams quite appalling to the uninitiated and gives in- 
structions for doing unimaginable things with organs of 
which most of us live in blessed ignorance. (The Macmillan 
Company. $1.50.) 



On an Irish Jaunt- 
ing - Car Through 
Donegal and Conne- 
mara is the record, 
by Samuel G. 
Bayne, of what to 
Mr. Bayne was 
doubtless a very en- 
joyable trip. Why 
he writes about it 
for publication, how- 
ever, does not ap- 
pear. It is, suc- 
cinctly, "Bayne, 
Green Label, Brut." 
(Harper and Broth- 
ers. $1.25.) 

J. B, Kerfoot, 

nPHB children of 
the rich lack 
the chief stimulus 
to imagination — the 
rag doll. 




A BOOK PLATE. 



LIFE- 



345 




Suit case witl^(M9Qtent8, $16. 
Sept , 1901. 



LEVY. 

Trank and contents, $10. 

Jane 14, 1901. 



*'I am afraid, dear,! shall 
hiive to try another country. I 
have sncceeded in procuring 
my iiassage to England and 
there, perhaps, I shall be able 
to start again where compe- 
tition is not so keen and merci- 
less as it is here, 

WANTED —Men to work their paasagv 
w England on fast cattle steamers. 
Apply at office. 
** and I came bnt to say ' good- 

by.' No, it is tme I have 

no money, bnt I will get 

along somehow.** 
She thmst a paper into 

his hand. 



"PBCBBS, SBB HOW THE COLOB HIS BUN IN THIS WAIST. IT*8 SIMPLY BUINED t'* 

** *DBED, XI88T, I HAS DB WU8T LUCK ; COLOB 8BE1IS TU BUN IN OUH PAMBILT t * 



The Mintown Bank. Pay to 
the order of James Barker the 
sam of one hundred dollars. 

Dorothy ITopHnt. 



t^A 



A Proved Romance. 

NOTB: The ttntUncjf of th* modem story ie 
towards exaggeratUm, Qften the reader has to 
take eniirfly unsvpported the uord of 
the author for alleged fads and eir- 
fttfMtamces that constitute the plot. Is 
it not time this thing was stopped f 

TT was a beautiful, balmy 
"^ day in June ; the 17th of 
June, 1901, the year before 
Commissioner Greene becmne 
head of the Police Depart- 
ment, and also the year before 
Piatt retired* from the ma- 
chine. The Sun (sent his 
scorching rays with furnace - 
like heat on the parched 
earth. 

See report of Weather Bareaa for 
Jnne 17, 1901. 

With her eyes cast down, 

Dorothy Hopkins walked 

slowly along the country 

road of Milltown, lost in 

thought. There were lines 

of care about her eyes 

and mouth. She was the 

daughter of Squire Hopkins, the 

wealthiest man in those parts, 

Bradstreet 

Hopkins, Merchant, W. D. E. 



and the girl was his only child, at 
that time just seventeen years of age. 

BIRTHS.— Mrs. Jane Hopkins, wife of Sqalre 
Hopkins, of a daughter.— ifl^^otm BvgU^ June 
17. 1884. 

Of a sudden the face of Dorothy 
lighted up, and a blush kindled in her 
cheeks at sight of a manly figure 
rapidly advancing towards her on the 
road. 

"Jim," she cried, for it was Jim. 

Mr. James Barker, of New York, Is in town for 
a few dAjB,—Milltotcn Bugle^ Jnne 16, 1001. 

The man wore a plain grey suit. 
As he saw Dorothy, a fiush over- 
spread his countenance and he quick- 
ened his pace. After their ardent 
embrace there was a pause, during 
which Dorothy anxiously scanned 
James's face. At last ue spoke: 

"Dorothy," he said, "I am a fail- 
ure. I went to New York to make a 
name writing, but I have not done it. 
I have not been prosperous; at times 
I have been very poor. 



He recoiled. **I can't 
take it," he cried, slipping the paper 
into his pocket. Then, with a choke 
in his voice, he murmured : *• Did you 
endorse it?" 
Unable to say more, but feeling 



ROSENTHAL. 

O. Watch, $6. 

An?. 7, 1901. 




*WHO*S THB VICTIM T' 



34« 



LIFE 




One cent. London Timet, One cent. 
I regret. 

B{fktM, 








'* WHAT INTBBUTINe BBBMOH8 TOD PBCACH T* 

** TE8. THB TIMB I SHOULD HATB BUM IN A THBOLOOICAL BBMIMABT I 8PBMT IN SOWING 
MT WILD 0AT8.*' 



PALL MALL GAZETTE. 
Enclosed seems really good staff, bat we nerer ose 
good staff In this pBper unless I write It, and I am tlie 
only Jadge of wliat Is good staff. TT. W. A. 

AUhoagh Dorothy conld not understand 
the fatal significaDce of these coantless 
pieces of paper in the occnrrenoe of 
the tragedy, for she had never written 
herself, being always a bright and 
happy little girl, she began to pine 
away. She refused to attend church 
sociables and concerts. Her father did 
all he could for her, which was not 
much, for all he had was money, but 
to no avail. On the 17th of June, 1902, 
just a year to a day from the time 
James sailed, Dorothy experienced the 
Final Shake-up, and joined in brighter 
lands him whom she could not live 
without. 

DIED— Dorotby Jeanette Hopkins, only daogb- 
ter of Squire Hopkins, at ber borne, yesterday. In 
ber 18tb year. 

'* In Heaven we sball meet ber. 

In ber robes of silvery bne. 
Sbe bas gone to join tbe angels, 
Tbat*s tbe place for me and yoa/' 
—MiUtown BugU, June 18, 1902. 

Norman Harris. 

"DRIGGS: What is the longest street 
-^ in the world? 

Griqgs: Give it up; but I know 
the shortest. 

"What's that?" 

"Wall Street.'* 

* TirrAITER, give me some Phila- 
^^ delphia gin.*' 
"What's that, sir?" 
'* Why, Sloe Gin, of course." 



somehow lighter in spirit on seeing 
Dorothy once again, he went away. 

Cleared -Steamer Argentine, for Liverpool, 
wiib cattle— ^Al/7pifi^ Nttrs^^ 

Dorothy stayed with her father on 
the farm. This story begins to re- 
semble those written by Hall Caine, 
but never mind. James wrote often, 
and she answered. But the sum of 
his success, translated into the ver- 
nacular of the time, was "Nothing 
doing." And then one day bad news 
came from England in the form of a 
cable for Dorothy at MiUtown under- 
ground, containing, as each word at 
night rates cost 25 cents, but this: 
"James dead." 



Later advices said he had used a 
pistol, and the London Times, with 
its usual love for aught sensational 
and "yellow," made a good story out 
of the suicide, featuring the 
fact that the body lay sur- 
rounded by piles and piles of 
printed elips, each alike in 
tenor or tone. 



TDEAUTY has made more martyrs 
-^ than Faith. 



Tbe Editor of Punch regrets 
being unable to nse tbis. D. 



TIT- BITS. 
Retnmed witb tbanks. 

J.S, 




BORATIUS AT THB BKIDOB. 



LIFE 



347 



•DON'T QUARREL WITH THE CABMAN' 





A Great Invention. 

'* XTES, sir, the telephooe is the greatest invention of the 
-^ age. Let me give you an illnstratiou of what it 
can do. Yon know that I live ont in the conn try ? '* 

"Yes." 

** Well, yesterday morning after I came to town, my cook 
left suddenly, whereupon my wife immediately called me 
up and told me about it.'* 

** How much did it cost ? ' ' 

** Oh, a mere nothing. Twenty-five cents." 

** What happened then ? " 

** Well, I immediately called up the manager of my ser- 
vant's agency. Had some little trouble in getting her, it 
is true, but I got her." 

" What did 8h3 say?" 

"Told me to call up a lady in Plainfield, who had a 
cook who was going to leave. I did so." 

** How much was that? " 

** Oh, fifty cents. I found out that the cook was there 
all right, and that she was a good cook. So then I called 
up my wife again." 

t* Twei^ty-five cents more." 

**Yes. Told her about the lady who had the cook 
in Plainfield, and advised her to call her up and talk 
about it. She did so." 

"How much?" 

" Oh, about fifty cents. Well, sir, will you believe it, 
she engaged that cook over the telephone." 

" Did the cook come ? " 

** No. Fact is, she didn't show up, and my wife 
came to town herself to-day and got another. But 
that isn't the point. What I wanted to show was 
what can be done with a telephone." 

" As near as I can make out, the telephone cost you a 
couple of dollars, and took up time enough to disturb 
your whole day. Why, if you hadn't had a telephone in 
the first place you wouldn't have known your cook 
left, and anyway it didn't make any difference, because, 
after all, your wife had to come in and attend to the 
matter personally . ' ' 

" By Jove ! You're right. I'll have that instrument 
taken out of my house at once." 



m^ 





L 




^4^^ 



<^*. 



THE BURIAL 




IE TRUSTS. 



350 



LIFE 



"TT- n I I 1 i r 





The Taming of Mr. R. H. Davis. 

TUSTICE has never been a distinguishing feature of 
^ what passes for dramatic criticism in the column! 
of New York's daily newspapers. Mere smartness and 
personal pr^udice most frequently take the place of the 
judicial fair-mindedness the public has the right to 
expect from the writers who are to determine the 
quality of plays and players. The way the daily 
newspapers have treated '^The Taming of Helen** 
at the Savoy is an excellebt illustration of that fact. 
It seems that through excessive self-conceit, or 
j bad manners, or something of that sort, Mr. R. 
I H. Davis, the author of the play, has made him- 
'self personally unpopular.' This personal un- 
popularity b especially strong among newspaper 
writers. Judging from the newspaper notices the 
day after its performance, "The Taming of 
Helen" was the worst play ever seen on the 
boards of a New York theatre. There were one 
or two exceptions, but the unanimity of censure looked almost as 
though there had been a preconcerted arrangement to ''jump on " 
Mr. Davis's play simply on account of Mr. Davis's personal un- 
popularity. In this festive proceeding the New York Herald, 
whose dramatic department has. for a long time been conspicuous 
for its lack of ability and integrity, took the leading part. Its 
article was as fine an example of distinguished incapacity as one 
could wish to see. 



•* n^UE TAMING OP HELEN " is not a great 
•^ play. But it is a masterpiece compared with 
some pieces which have met the favor of the New York 
daily newspapers and whose technical defects have 
never been discovered by them, or at least have not 
been dwelt upon at length. While not a great play, 
"The Taming of Helen" is very far from being 
beneath contempt. Its story is a connected one and is 
told with clearness. If Miss Grace Elliston, the Helen 
of the piece, had been more coquettish and less intense 
in the earlier scenes the air of probability would have 
been heightened and the title better justified. At no 
time did it seem necessary to " tame '* her into marry- 
ing the budding dramatist, impersonated by Mr. Henry 
Miller, and whose vicissitudes in love and in getting 
his first play produced furnish the plot. A London 
actress, Marion Cavendisk (Miss Jessie Millward), is 
the hero's good fairy and helps him to success in both 
his ambitions. Incidentally we have two very good 
scenes, one a ball at a London town-house, and the 
other the greenroom of a Loudon theatre during the 
first performance of the hero's play. 

Mr. Miller, as the young American dramatist, has a 
light comedy part into which he fits with considerable 
He reduces his tendency to stiffness and 




Miss Eluston 
AND Ur. Millxr. 



staginess to a greater ex- 
tent than ever before and 
his performance is 
smooth and agreeable. 
Miss Jessie Millward evi- 
dently finds her task a 
congenial one, playing 
the part with spirit and 
evident enjoyment. Miss 
Elliston might be de- 
scribed as an actress who 
reads her lines without 
punctuation and almost 
invariably with the 
wrong inflection. But 
lier penroniility is pleasing and she is very 
miifh ky i^wniL'st, so her defects are not 
SatHl M isH Drina de Wolfe is Urs. £vian, 
a Jiiily ^' with a record," and makes the 
dm meter 'a badness sufilciently evident. 
Mr. John Flood does a really clever bii as a 
I.*(irit1on actor-manager, and Mr. Morton 
Bel u II Itf m unctuous as ever as a good- 
iarnrtod but stupid English friend of the 
hrTu's. In fact, the play was smoothly 
jM t^ tl throughout, owing to a considerable 
ti|*riciice on the road before it was 
broujjht to Kew York. 

**The Tntning of Helen " has some 
bright linc.H and a few monumental chest- 
nut;^, hut oil the whole is amusing and 
furiiielie* A goad deal mOre rational even- 
ing's entertainment than do many of the 
*' shows " which are boomed into long runs. 
Metcalfe, 




MISS XILLWABD. 



LIFE'S CONFIDENTIAL GUIDE TO THE THEATRES. 
A eademp qf MvHc.—'* Tbe Suburban.'' Melodrama with stirring racing 

.B«Ja#co.— "Tbe Darling of tbe 6od8." Japanese tragedy 
most artistically staged. 

Bifau.—'Mairie Cablll In '* Nancy Brown.'' Musical comedy. 
Usual type. 

Broadway,— ** The Prince of Pllsen.** Musical comedy. 
More tuneful than tbe average. 

OzHmo.— "Tbe Chinese Honeymoon." Musical comedy. 
Fairly diverting. 

CW/eHon —Charles Hawtrey in "A Message from Mars.'' 
Tmusnal and amuslBg play. 

Daly's,—'* Tbe Starbucks," by Opie Reed. Notice later. 

Garcf^n.— "Everyman.*' Artistic rendering of interesting 
old morality play. 

OarrUk.—'* Mice and Men,*' with Annie Russell as tbe 
Star. Pretty play, weU done. 

Herald Square.-QvBce George in " Pretty Peggy .» Elabo- 
rate producUon of play based on life of Peg Wufflngton. 
Wortb seeing. 

iinirJb«r6odb^.— "Mr. Bluebeard.'' Musical comedy. More 
gorgeous than clever. 

Maditon Square.—" A Fool and His Money. "Notice later. 

jr<r/«<k.— "The Wizard of Oz." Funny, spectacular and 

tuneful. 

Manhattan,—** The Earl of Pawtucket" Excellent comedy. 

Ptinctfs.—lstAweek of **The Frisky Mrs. Johnson." Clyde 
Fitch play of society life. Diverting. 

SnrXu — •• The Taming of Helen. " See above. 

l5cSria.-"Re8urrecilon." Pretty strong meat but inter- 

^mSiflf*'*.— 'Tho Sultan of Sulu." Musical comedy. 
Clever. 



LIFE 



351 




*FOB LOYB AND 8PRIJIO XAKI A GOOSB OP BVXRT ONE.**— 0/(i Boiiad, 



Postals from a Home-made 
Son to a Self-made Father. 

T^EAR FATHER: I arrived on the 
^-^ college green this morning. 
Something is wrong with my clothes, 
as I was made considerable fnn of. 
Am going to get a new suit. Will 
send you bill. Yours, Jim. 

Dear Fa : Cnt chapel this morning. 
All the boys do it. I am keeping away 
from whiskey as you suggest. Have 
you eTer tasted cr6me de menthe ? It 
settles your dinner. Yours, Jim. 

Dear Pop : You are way off on 
temperance question. Beer is the 
great leveler. If we all drank beer 



there would be no drunkards. I got 
away with ten bottles last night. Dead 
®***y* Yours, Jim. 

Dear Dad : Would you care if I 
got married ? I was introduced to a 
lovely girl last night. She is older 
than I, but a few years don't matter. 
What allowance can we count on from 
you? Wire answer. jj-;^. 

Dear Father : If you have not yet 
answered my last postal, don*t bother. 
Affair all off. She went back on me 
in most shameful manner. After all, 
she was only a college widow. I send 
bill for new waistcoats. Had to have 
'©ni. Yours, Jim. 

Dear Ooternor : Can you let me 



have my next month's allowance? By 
the way, have you ever played x>oker ? 
Great game, isn't it? ji„i^ 

Dear Dad : How is everything 
around the old homestead? How's 
Dobbin, and are the calves taking 
notice yet ? I love the old place dearly. 
Send me a hundred, will you? I'm 
raising a crop of peaches myself . 

Jim. 

Dear Pop : I've just got an invite 
from a chnm to spend the vacation 
with him, so don't expect me. Say, 
can't you ^et a second mortgage on the 
farm, and send me enough to buy an 
automobile ? Yours, Jim. 

Dear Old Bot : It was handsome 



352 



LIFE 





LIFE'S FASHIONS. 
▲ sLoaBsnoN to vast tbb monotomt or ths prbsbnt dimhbb 




A TIB UP ON TBB BBIDOB. 

of you to stand by me. I Hend yoa a registered package 
by this mail containing ten thonsand dollars, being part of 
the royalties on my new book, Seeing Life, More to come. 
This week I marry a millionairess. But don't yoa mind. 
She's respectable. Yonrs, Jim. 

Tom Mas$an. 

~T N Society one must pnt gloves on one*s worda too. 

Real People. 

THE DEVIU 
n^H£ DEVIL is one of the most important parsonages of 
-^ ancient or modern times. He began to attract attention in 
the Grarden of Eden, but now his headquarters are in Chicago. 

One of the peculiar things about him is that while no one has 
ever actually seen him', a great many have raiBed him. 

He has a large personal following, not only among out-and-out 
sinners, but some of bis most important work has been done by 
church people. He stimulated some of the missionaries iu their 
Chinese mission, and brought on a delightful little war in which 
he came out a handsome victor. He has a branch office in every 
city, and if it were not for his splendid constitution, he would un- 
questionably break down. On the contrary, however, his work 
seems to agree with him. " Plenty of work, but no worry,*' is his 
motto. 

He has a political machine of his own, runs several important 
newspapers, controls several legislators, and is present at every 
church conference. 

The Devil has no vices. He never touches 
rum, nor smokes cigarettes, nor attends meet- 
mgs of the W. C. T. U. 

At present he is engaged upon a new Edu- 
cational System, which he thinks will do 
more harm than any we have yet had. 

The Devil has ollen been urged by some of 
his friends, the publishers, to write a book, 
but has always refused. 

''My monument," he says Justly, '*mnst 
lie in my work. I am self-made, but not so 
vain about it that I wish to rush into print. I 
have plenty of admirers as it is, and I am 
satisfied that by pressing my own modest line 
of work, I shall not have lived in vain, and, 
somehow, I feel that I shall always have my 
due." 

The present address of His Migesty is 
" Car^of W. R. Hearst, The Chicago Anuri- 
can." Cable address, " Sunny Kick." 



m^^- 



OOMB people prefer to take their 

patent medicine in the form of 
Christian Science. 






A WAMDBBBR ON TBB PACB OP TBB BAJtTB.' 



LIFE 



353 




A CASE OF NECESSITY. 

"WHT, ALL MT XONBT*8 60!l« I'* 
**T»II, 1 TOOK IT, dear/' 

"what under nSATENg DID TOU DO THAT 70R?** 

*' WHY, I KNBMT TOU WOULDN'T LET MB HAVE IT 11" I AflKED TOU." 



LIFE 



^^^M^ 




REFLECTIONS OF A REJECTED MANUSCRIPT. 



A MS. in the publisher's hand Is worth two 
In the author's. 

An editor is known by the MSS. he keeps — 
and the stamps. 

Desperate authors require desperate reme- 
dies. 

A poet and his poem are soon parted. 

In submitting a MS. he who hesitates is a 
wonder. 

All is not gold that glitters ... on book 
covers. 

Faint purse never won fair publisher. 

A true friend Is one who laughs at our Jokes. 

It is a wise author who knows his own MS. 
after ... it has been blue penciled. 

An author's royalties are often far from royal. 

No satirist is hero to his own epigram. 

"Many Happy Returns of the Day" applies to 
the unsuccessful writer all the year round. 

—London Speaker. 

The burglar softly opened the door of the sub- 
urbanite's sleeping apartment, slipped inside, and 
searched the room thoroughly, but found nothing 
worth stealing. "Dam him!" he soliloquized; "I'll 



get some satisfaction out of him, anyway !" There- 
upon he set the alarm clock on the bureau for the 
hour of three, and softly departed. — Chicago Tri- 
bune. 

That the people of South Carolina had little 
regard for Theodore Parker, the anti-slavery leader, 
is evident from the experience a Boston merchant 
once had in Charleston. According to J. H. Trow- 
bridge, an excited crowd gathering around tbe hotel 
register where he had written his name, observed 
him. with suspicious whisperings. Thereupon the 
excited landlord stepped up to him and said, 
anxiously: " Your name is Parker?" 

"That is my name, sir." 

"Theodore Parker, of Boston, the abolition- 
ist?" 

"Oh no, no, sir! I am Theodore D. Parker, a 
very different man !" 

The landlord heaved a sigh of relief. "I am 
glad to hear it!" he said; "and allow me to give 
you a bit of wholesome advice. When you are 
registering your name in Southern hotels, write 
the D damned plain !" — Atlantic Monthly. 

There is a Chinese story which tells how a 
very stingy man took ^ paltry sum of money to an 



artist — pajrment is always exacted In advance — 
and asked him to paint his portrait. The artist at 
once complied with the request, but when the por- 
trait was finished nothing was visible save the 
back of the sitter's head. 

"What does this mean?" cried the sitter. Indig- 
nantly. . 

"Well," replied the artiet, "I thought a man 
who paid so little as you paid wouldn't care to 
show his face." — China and the Chinese. 

The following advertisement, printed under the 
classification "Matrimony," is taken from a recent 
Issue of the Melbourne Argus: 

"A. — Marriages celebrated any denomination, by 
clergymen, with due solemnity, in strictest privacy, 
at Holt's Matrimonial Chambers, 448 Queen-st.. 
Melbourne, opposite Old Cemetery, or elsewhere, 
from 10 a. m. till 9 p. m., daily. Saturdays included 
(no notice required) . Marriage fee, 10s. 6d. ; or 
marriage, with guaranteed gold wedding ring and 
necessary witnesses provided. £1 Is. More costly 
wedding rings in stock if required. Marriage cer- 
tificates supplied with above marriages are same as 
those supplied by leading ministers of Victoria." — 
Exchange. 



LiFB is for sale by all Newsdealers in Great Britain. The IntemaUonal Mews 
Company, Bream's Building, Chancery Lane. London, E. C, England, Aosktb. 



Established 1823. 

WILSON 
WHISKEY 

That's AIII 



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Baltimore. Md. 



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Neckwear. 

ORAYATS-Gradoated Tlea of Lawn, Dimity, 

or BArathea. 

ENGLISH SQUARES— Chest wick. Flowing 

Euds, Four in- Hands. 

Shirts to Order or Finished to Wear. 

Collars and Caflb, Pajamas. Bath Gowns. 

Negligee Robes, SUk Handkerchiefs. 

Gloves. 

Easter Shades and Weights. 

Lap Robes, Tourists' Rugs, etc. 

NEW YORK. 



Hunter 
Whiskey 

Perfection in Age,. 
Purity, Flavor. 

WjL Lahabah a Son, Baltimore, Md. 





The Ideal 

Physicians* 

Automobile 



GEO. N. PIERCE CO.«"SS^'t^ 
PIERCE Cycles and ARROW Motor Cars. 

Catalogues Free on Application. 



YAL L. LEGRAND 



Tff£ LATEST SUCCESS OF THE 
ORIZA-PERFUMERY (Oraad Friz Faris 1900) 



LIFE 



No better Turkish Cigarette 
can be made 



Ergyptian 
Deities 





\^^^^^^^^^K^_^ -p 


King Edward drank 

WHllE ROCK at the 
Lord Mayor's banquet 


1 




THE CLUB 

are the oris^nal bottled Cocktails. 
Years of experience have made 
them THE PERFECT COCKTAILS 
that they are. Do not be lured 
into buying some imitation. The 
ORIGINAL off anything Is good 
enough. When others are offered 
it is ffor the purpose of larger prof- 
its. Insist upon having the CLUB 
COCKTAILS, and talce no other. 

G. F. HEURLETN & BRO.. S»U Pr^prUtort 

29 Broadway, New York, N. Y. 

Hartford, Conn. London 



Comics Wanted 

In single column for regular daily service. 
Steady work for clever artists. 
Address 

HIGH CI-ASS, 
P. O. Box 277, New York City. 



««at the SIGN of the BULL DOG'' 

We make 

Pure 

Habana 

Segars 

In the honest 
old faahlon. 

Sold by 

independent 

Dealers. 

Baron DeKalb 




Henry Iilving 



For 60c. we -will send you a handsoma 
picture of KINO I«UD, champion Bull 
Doff of the world, framed In weattaared 
oak kenneL 

J^hn W. MerrioLin & Co. 

The R.ovcroft Sege^r Sl\op. wiiich 
is ''At the Sign of the Bull Dog" 

139 Maiden Lane, New York 



The Great Passenger Line of America-NEW YORK CENTR/ 



LIFE 



4^^ 




r^iT'OuR. foOLfSH 
(9NTEMP0RA, 



A REMINDER. 
"Ads." of breakfAst foods sround us 

Point to dsys when men untsught 
With their wisdom will astound us. 
Fed on pre<ligeBted thought. 

— W<uhington Pott. 

ELECTRIC.LIGHTCD TRAIN TO CALIFORNIA. 
The Oyerland Limited is % solid through fast train leay- 
log Chicago daily at 8KX) P. M. for San Fraqcisco, less than 
three days en route, Tla the Chicago k North- Western, 
Union Pacific and Southern Pacific Railways. Its superb 
equipment Includes buffet and smoking cars (barber and 
bath), compartment, obseryatlon and dining cars, electric 
reading lamps In e^ery berth, telephone and Bookloyers* 
library. The best of eyerything. Two other fast trains 
leaye Chicago lOHX) A. M. and 11:30 P. M. daily. 

"I wish you had broken the news more gen- 
tly." sighed the editor, as the office boy pled the 
first page by dropping the form down a fiight of 
stairs. — Baltimore American. 

HOTEL VENDOME, BOSTON. 
All the attractions of hotel life, with the com- 
forts and privacy of home. 

Sunday School Tbachxk: Well, who wab 
sorry at the return of the Prodigal Son? 

Little Gibl: The fatted calf. — BoBton Chris- 
tian Rigiater. 

QooD health Is real wealth—Abbott's, the Original 
Angostura Bitten Is a yeritable fortune to the weak. 

Instbuctor (of claaa in phyaiology): Wbat 
do you know concerning the sebaceous follicles? 

Boy at Foot op Class (making a wild gueaa): 
Sebaceous Follicles is the name of the new Senator 
from the State of Washington.— CAko^ Tribune. 

** Haotb thee, nymph, and bring with thee Jest and 
youthful Jollity *'— Milton : and a bottle of Cfook's imperial 
Extra Dry Champagne. 

Miss Flirty: How do you like my new en- 
gagement ring? 

Miss Cutting: It's a t>eauty; when does it 
come off? — Town and Country. 

APPRECIATION. 

Gee whiz ! 

What a dream it is 

Of golden sparkle 

And crown of white 

In a gurgling guzzle 

Of pure delight 

That tingles the nerves 

And makes one wish 

That he were an ever 

Insatiable f.sh 

Turned loose to live 

In an infinite pall 

Full up to the brim 

Of Evans* Alb. 

Yum, yum! 

Wow! 

See? 

The Bar to Riches : More men would be 
rich if money were as bard to spend as it is to 
earn. — Chicago Newe. 




Etc 



^"Auto-Sparker 

does awmj entlrelj with all star^ 
inic and nmninsr batterle*, their an- 
noyance and expense. Ko belt— no 
■witch— no batteries. CSn be ac> 
tacbed to any enclne now aalji^ 
batteries. ftiUy guaranteed ; write 
for deecriptlve catalog. 

Motalmrtr Device Mfg. Co. 
70 Main Street, Pendleton, Ind. 





^ CIG ARETTES 

A STANDARD or 
EXCELLENCE IKIWPAUED | 



/ \ 

SPRING MEETING 

METROPOLITAN 
JOCKEY CLUB 

—AT— 

JAMAICA, Long Island 

from Monday, April 27th 
to WednesdoLV, May 6th 

OPENING DAY 

THE EXCELSIOR HANDICAP 
with $5,000 added, e^nd five 
other retces. 

Track can be reached tU Lodit Island Raliroad. 
foot or East Situ St. ; and from Flatbiuli Ave. 
Station, Brooklyn. 

For Time Tables, tee Dally Papers. 




londondcrri) 

LITHIA WATER 

IS gTatIfyiG[yi satirfying and 
healthful. This greatest of 
all table waters is enjoyed 
as weU by the young club- 
man, who needs a health* 
iul stimulant, as by his 
elders who fi^ght against 
gout and rheumatism. 




©LO CROW RYE 



STRAIGHT l^f4IOl\LE m SOLE BOTTLERS. NEW* YORK. 



LIFE 



C 



Buffalo 



LiTHiA Water 

A Powerful Nerve Tonic and Restorative. Does 

it Contain Hypophosphites of Lime and 

Soda ? An Invaluable Remedy 

in Neurasthenia. 

Hunter MeGulrSy M.D.i \A^D»^ ex-President of American Medical Asso- 
ciation and of Medical Society of Vir^inta^ Late President and Professor of Clinical 
Surgery^ University College of Medicine^ Richmond^ Va,^ etc. : ** It has never failed 
me as a powerful nerve tonic when I have prescribed it as such, producing a 
decided calming effect in men and women whose broken-down nervous system 
had Icept them In perpetual motion, who could not sleep, and who could not rest. 
I sometimes think it must contain hypophosphltes of lime and soda. It acts as 
that compound does — as a tonic and alterative. I know from constant nse of it per- 
sonally and in practice that the results obtained from its use are far beyond those 
which would be warranted by the analysis given. I am of the opinion tliat it either 
contains some wonderful remedial a^ent as yet undiscovered by medical science, or 
its elements are so delicately combined in Nature's laboratory that they defy the 
utmost skill of Uie chemist to solve the secret of their power." 

Dr. E. C. Lalrdy Resident Physician, Hot Springs, N. C: "No intelligent 
observer can fail to note the BnvB^v g% f nvflM UnVB ^^ * Nervous 
extraordinary power of the DUsTJIUI IslilUA lUilUi Tonic. In view, 

then, of the fact that a healthy condition of Nervous Endowment is essential to 
all vital process, it is readily understood that it is a remedy of great potency and 
wide adaptation in morbid conditions of the human system. In the conaition known 
as Nervous Dyspepsia Neurasthenia, and broken-down conditions generally of 
the Nervous System » it is often a wonderful restorative." 

Dr. J. T. Menlstrlnai St. Louis^ Member of the St. Louis Medical Society, 
Visiting Surgeon City Hospital, WHxmmmmg^ 1 WUIM litorro ^^^ ^^ P^^ 
etc. : ''1 have been prescribing DVCFJlMl lillffllAWfilEJI twelve vears 
in Uric Acid Diathesis, in Nephro-Lithiasis, in Chronic Parynchsematons Nephritis 
and Interstitial Nephritis with marked improvement in my patients. I may add 
also that in Neuras- !>■— — »^ f mmmgmm litoMwu Spring No. 2, an invalu- 
thenla we have in IMFrfflllJU LI11IIA WfllUC abte remedy. A trial 
will satisfy the most skeptical." 

Voluminous medical testimony, attesting the value of this water in Bright*s 
Disease, Albuminuria, Inflammation of the Bladder, Qout, Rheumatism and 
all Uric Acid Troubles, mailed to any address. 

BUIfALO LiTHIA VfiSTER ^ ^^' ^^ ^y ^^^^^ a^d grocers generaUj. 

Hotel at Springs opens June i5th. 

PROPRIETOR BUFFALO LITHIA SPRINGS. VIRGINIA. 




161 BROADWAY. S88 BROAOWAY. 

723 SIXTH AVENUE. 

NEW YORK. 



Importatioiis for 1902 of 

G. H. MUMM & Co.'$ 
Extra Dry 

were 407 , 304 bottles 
"'ore than any other brand. 

The Fmhms 1898 Viiitaa. of Mumm's Extra 
Dry, now arriving, is destined to malte 



^ 



a still more emphatic Increase. 



THINNESShWOMEN 

la a dl0tr«idnff and humlHatlng' oondltf on from which 
any womma to afflicted can now obtain relief. ^By Dr. 
BlTard'sBystem the welffht can be easily, onlokly and 
Mfely increued t