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ir 3, » 


-— -^ ■ -' Jl 




* _ 

Guzman ctAlfarache: 

O R, t H E 


_ « • 

To which is added^ 

The Celebrated Tragi-Comcdy^ 


In Two Volumes- 

Written in Spanijh 

By M A T i O A 1 E M A n; 

Done into EngUJI) from the New French Verfion^, 
and compar'd with the Original. 

"J »' ■ 

feveral Hadds; 

Adontd with Scutptures by Gafpit Bouttats, 

T O L I; 

L 6 N D O N. 

Printed for R. Eommcky W. Freemany T. GooJmny 
y,. Wahhoty M. JVpttOTfj J. Nicholfovy S. Manjhi^y 
R. Parker y B; fookey afnd i?. Smitk ija8. 

^ '■ r. / ' •■» ■•.■»--.- ^ . ; ■■ • .-• .■ .- --:-'■. =- ■ 

\ . 

■.'it ' 


4 .• 

•- " . - r -r' _ __ J ■ ,_JL-_>_^^ 


* ■ M ll > ■ I ■ !■ ■ ' <l 



• > 


Lord Mdrqilels 

O F 


(Here's no need of ad- 
. qiiaitttiing .Your iefrrf. 

^/? with the Ch^a^^r 
6f the. fdUowing Treatifcj M^i|ioh 
feem$ ^t feft Vi«?«r to be ^Ipfgrt 


Epifile T)edicatory» 

eJ only for the Diveifiuii of the 
y^o/?&* But whoever looks into 
it, will find die Author intended 
ie for the Inftnii^ion, a^il^U a$ 
the Fleafure, of all Mankind. 

k A < 

Yotir JjOfi^^f IS too irelt read, 
in both Ancient and Modern 
Learning, to ir eoeive any Light 
j&om iis, in what coxicei|t^ , the 
^^to Lef^m. And Wfe mall be 
proud of the Honour of Enter- 
taining You in fome of Your 
Gayer Minutes^ when ^You^ re- 
lieve Your Serious StucTies with 
Things plea(aiit and :4moflng. 
Thou^ We muft be - fo Juft to 
«ut Author^ as to declare,- That, 
befides the Pfeafamryiof the 

•^ Reiie(ftions, 

Erfcaions, with as mudi Inge: 
nious SatvTr applicable to the 
Ck>mmon Irrois of Huaaak 


liEs y in tiiis , . as in any j^ook 
whatfoevdr; ne^idxftanding ks 
Air is not fo Solemn and Severe^ 
as thait of ibme of our A^d Ef 

Jays, . - .: 

The Reputation it is in Aw 
broad^ '^here it Has foiuid Ad« 
miti(ai)ge into the Cabinets^ of 
the moil Learned and moft Cu- 
rious of the Politer Nations, ever 
(inoe it wd^ publifti'd , fhews, 
'tis fbi^edDing more than the 
Mean Hiftory of ^ Vulgar Shar^. 
pet 5 /and that the Name of Gui^ 
man is oqjiy made ufer o^ to de« 
fe:^. the Marnier s of: feva:al 
. • . :^ A 5 Perfous 


Epijlle T>edicaiory. 

Pcrfbns of much better Gondii 
tion than (tJlfaracbcvBut Your 
Lord/hip will foon difcover all 
this y without any Intiinationi 
6x>tjfx:m ; and -t^s fui&ient that 
)iire:ai:e forgiren for approaching 
'X'bn in this W^y, without prcr, 
fuming to interrupt You with- -a^ 
tedious Difcourfe of the Good- 
n^fs of our Author, wftofe Me- 
rit iand Fame fpeak more for him, 
than we can fay in bis Vindica:^, 
tion. ' . ; i 

. ) 

Your Lbrdjhfp. willj .wc hopCj^' 
find we are not too Partial in our 
Judgment ; and though *we can., 
not ptetend to have pteferv^d alt 
the Beauties of the Original^ w© 
may venturQ to affirm; there's 


enough left to divert a Man^ 
who is willing to be diverted 

Yoiii LQrdJhif% High Birth ^^ 
and lUuftrious Alliance, -pkce 
You ii? the Firft Rank of the 
^riti/h Nobility I and Youf In- 
clination to Letters and ^fm, gives 
us the Fromilp^ that You will 
be their TroteSor: They cannot 
hope for a more ^powerful One, 
and they never ftood more in 
need bf Protedioii, • 

If You are pleas'd to allow it 
to th^ Tranflation of this Tteatife, 
it will rai{§ its Fortune above 
that of th^ Original: And what^ 
ever Caufe Don Jieman had to 
9pmplain of his Fate, the Tran- 


Happy as he was' Unfortunate. 
Vmki Fitb;; ajl imj*g|palpk Re^ 

moft Devoted SetvanKy 




s « 

' J. Savage. 

« « 4 

r < 


* « * •< ' 


> \ 

T H F 

Enslifh Tranflat 


'1 ^•' ^ 

♦ i 'I 

« . * ^ ■ '. • * * * * ^ 

'iEK^ i^ hardly avy^Jsmgn^ge ini'Bai^ 
Tope if A^ kpmvs^ niAl^xx^ztri akdtSe^ 
Spanifb Rogue m 4i:mmOaiJ(d &f, "-'ait 

if th^^ pas no oth^ in the World :^ Bnii^k 
AUf^l l^on AI&?a^he is only dii^ A\l%<xry fir idk 
M^inlffnd tp ieam by^ er^ at kafi\^in. hh Tikm 
^tTMOi : A General CharaUtr fsr rartifitdars fo' j&r^ 
^hr i^n>^ FiSnres in 5 . and there mr$ fep ofihe 
Saints of thofi D^s^ but one Part of anotier jrfs 
bif Cloaking tmhU fit them. We have the HfpS^: 
Mfi t^ live in pother j^q:^ Rogues, than^C our. 
Stars y OTi as fcaree nm>y as homji\Men were im 
QvtZm?kik':S Tinm. ■■r$s a temtiUe Thing to thrnl^ afi 

fo fftdt 4 Rafcal "as thk Alfariiche. How.U^ k> 
Manfter he.vpitnld hok at the Royal-Exchange/ 
VV^ftminfter-Hall, St. JamesV Park > People vBauldi 
h frkhfed at the Sight of him^ as Children are' 


The EngUfb Twnflators Prefaced 

iriV^ Raw-head Mnd Bloody-bones. But^ hot^ 
tvtr^ vpe mU venture a littk. 'Ifs but to makg tbem 
Start a firjl^ tbefl grow Familiar with bim dfterr 
fparcU^ and Ten to Une^ before they have reaa the 
Book oHt^ they cry^ I fee no Harm in him, 'tij 
the Way of the World. Every Body^ lives by 
jbis Wits , who would not be Rich and Hapr 
py if he coirid > Where's the Hu^^ if a Man 
e^n^^raife feimfelf from a Dunghill to ride*i|i 
&TS -Coach, and be carried about in his Chair 
by better Men than himfclf. No Man's a 
Rogue that has Money in his Pocket. 7^ 
^e j^pe Mqral^, are they not i They are con^on 
enough toe own\^ hardly a Gamefter^ a Ufurer^ d — • 
But Uh to no purpoje to enter upon F articular s ^^ 
huiily a Thriving Felhw in any^ufinefs hut 'har 
theje Ethfcks ij' Hearty yet\ as fine as they are^ 
they brought Guzman to the^OaHies. and wem^n- 
der his Difciptes efcape Jo well an. they do. As^to 
this Tranflation of him^ 'tis ftot from the Spartill^ 
0nlf^ as our old dry Englifli Quatman was^^bfO^ 
faithfkily done pom a Nero' Verfibn in French r 
Jn vrhich^ all that was Tediom in the Spanifh ir 
kft out^ and aU that was Plcafant kept in. But lee 
the French Tranfiator jujiify himfelf in this Cafes 
He fays in his Prefece; with an JJpirance^ i^^if)^ 
could command Afplaitfe : I dar« fay there arre 
itiany good Things in this Tranflation, becaftfe 
they are none of my own, and fomebadOnes^ 
which I aip not bound to vindicate Pfnd 
whoever lays them to myCliir^je, will dtTftw;^ 
Wrong: For, without Vafjit'y-tte it fpQkep, ; 
'. • i there 

The EifgHfh Tranflators Preface:^ 

lifaere would have been many more of the iAt% 
ttr. If I had not Abridged and Clipt thera. I 
have alfo added fevepal new Turns of Thought. 
and Expreffion, that the Whole might loofc 
with a Modern Air. 'Tis no eafy Thin^ to 
make a Spdni/b Suit fit a Frehch-manj efpecially. 
an old One. The Antipatfy between the TwjdJ 
Ndtions appears in every Thing. Though tbSli 
Book is not proper for Lent and Holidays; it 
win do well in CarnavaUtimc. 'Tis fitted to 
all Shapes and Sizes. A Saddle for every Horfe i 
A Man need but try it, and feveral lAm\ 
whb. believe 'twas niade for others, will find 
the 0>at fits as well upon them, as if the Tav^ 
lor had cut it out by their own Meafure. The 
Misfortune is, every one belieVes be is Tall 
and Well*(hap'd, and yet there are hardly' 
any but Crooked and Hump-back*d Men \^ 
the World. There is no Man but looks on 
himfelf with Pleafure and Admirationf, and 
9n otheis, only to Laugh and Rail at them. 
This is the Truth of the Matter. We caift 
Correft it ^ and. he. that would fet up for 2 
Hgfirmety will, find he has a . hard Task on't. 
I do not think my Author could hope for Suc- 
cess, he knew Mankind tdo well, and was 
bimielf too wife to fancy, he could make others; 
fo. 'Wherefore following his Example, I am, 
^car Reader, your moft Humble and nioft Obe-: 
dieht , €^c* Wha can we add to the French 

'■■'■' '"■..' it»d 

The Ei^ifb Tranflatois Picfeca 

0$£^hafe a nm estertahmtg Tranftatwn. Wwfinmd 
ss much go^ Sartfe aud mare Pleaftnhy ^ as mncb 
,Kefl$liion offdMore Witj im hiTQazman, tbatt m 
fhe Original SpaniBi. Trir, .his, RejkSions are, 
$tot fpun out fa fa much Lengthy jhft they oofnprifi 
i$s much Reafan in fewer Wards 5. and the Boak^ m 
be has mkn'agd if, is hath niare ^reeakk akdlfnan 
f^rnSive. For mhbiver reads the . Lifet.of A1&4. 
tache, fliauld i^. da. it as iin jimnfiipmrt a»tj/ ^ hi 
((mjtder aU-ahng^ ihd 'tis rather a Etble thma iHW 
ftory. ZXfukr tl^'Pcrfin. of Guzman, kmdktL 

(ewrd farts of Rdpies whavs ive mta. vtitk i»:thk. 
World i^ and th& Author bamng Jitfa, Mat^' hp vMvb 
mjhould kpom thentj we majf the better avoH^^ihemz 
Th4 Great, efieciaffj^ may fie the IneoMvemmieiof 
Jkch fart of Senumts as fiaitiet tkem in thean Fiia^ 
JiireSj fnakf Vuefd^r and bring ^$iin ant ithafi ibam 
*frkjithem. - ' ' i: :. .. . - :; i v :; 

• ^ I i • 

^ The Yiovththat. are kittrmT^d^ mtb the\Sl^ry^ 
tpere intended by the S^m^ Attthar to rdiew ir^ 
Tediajtjhefs, r»l^ch^ however ^ wants '»a Relief t: iFat 
yis eqiiAUy V^frl and Div^ting. We ftkHf^^nm 
mdre of the urigind^ having ihii. fair Recanmtem. 
datiah of hi/ Work: fhin Ge^kmen .af Mfiomni 
Country^ That:fke Ai^har Dan Pieman, was a Pith^ 
Jon who hiid'^ diAhgidJh'd himfil^ by h^ Mtritl 
Dan Luys dr^?at&s"f«^/ ia:/;*'i« ET^ 
printed before If A^j'Spamfh Edition of GottnaiV 

There never wks a poorer Sditilar / a xkbcb 
Mind, nor a more pcrplek^tl' Life, than his^ He 
preferr'd being a poor Philofopher, before the 

»• < V 

The Eftgitfb TimQutotiVtithLCQ, 

OmtSbet of a Weahhy Flatterer.; He kfsf'd 
Pi&r^ the Secbud in £ev«rftl oonfidemble fitlK 
ploys, and left hit . Service^ becatire be. coukk 
net oonform himfelf to the evil PfadifeS bf 
yrbkh he faar XKhers enrich • tbifitirelTes. . Ha 
bfhav'd bimfelf Fa ' Qpr%htly in iA dw 

Flaoes he en^yU, chst he got nothing but 
Efteertl'lsy it. 'He ruin d his tioalch by hti 
great Applkatidn to his:StHdie&» His Famo 
was as imtdi eelebcated io tjMji Fnnce, Ga*f 
Pkbfj/f and flofidert, as in his own Coua^^ 
His Natne wfts hardly ev>er mentkm'd vriiliotMl 
6)Me poffipoas Epithet, . and many ftil'd faamf 
tkt 'Sfani/b iXvhie, In Ids than Three Yeaf». 
lime ht faw his' Works traoMed iitito feverat 
LatiitU^es. ;I -Iteve beard, eottimm be, iji 
Tif^rlty (ix ii^prefiions of his Hock, whidi 
in all eontain'd Fifty dioofand .Copies. The 
llniv««fity of SaUntMc* na^hcboaft of MtMf. 
AkuSm, as i^hetu of' Ikntopxna , or Rami oC 
C*^^ ftfid an A*§»j^im Fryer at a PubliekA^ 
in that Academy dddar^d, Tbete never was J 
Bobk 6f gtt^r \Sk, both ioi its Morality sftd 
I>%ht, thah (be: J^e . of Gmumoi^ One M0MI 
hiiy*n^ tempted by thie Applaoiie given the Trot 
mtm Alemt^, pubUfltid A Ssdond Part Id it^. 
b»t 'twas foon ^{Vover^d to be wbritMn by snot- 
thttr'Hfttid, and ir aoaoidifi^y met with difl&*> 
W«t Sticce(k' ^mtn was thea bufy'd . in >snft- 
tflg^he Vx^iof^SvAntb&nif of Pa^^z; -wrbitjft he 
did, M P&ffoTmatker of t ^M[: «nkle to lKri)Ee 
k on bii Recovery 1ftofn«.Fit'i)<*i$ickad9i',. }^ 


The £%A^ tranflitdrs Pf e6^^^ 

find another Elogium in Spaoifll» hefbre th$ Lift 
$f Guzman , xtritten hy Dan Alphonfo de Bar-^ 
fOS 5 who^ afitr tery great CommendatiMs of the, 
Work,^ both as to its Pledfure arfd Profit^ writes 
tbtb : The Life of oiir Hiftoriair, Mdleo jUfi^ 
0Mk, was as Inftruftive as his BooL Iror he 
was very far ff oip being fach a fort of Pcrfon, 
as he infinuates in bis Htftoty. He Mras bred 
wp in the Study of the Belles Lettres from hi$ 
Youth, and, w>ile a Boy, was never oqt of 
Ibme Employment or other 5 fp tha!t,his Life 
can by nq means be charg'd wich Idkn^fs in 
any Part of it^ When he left the Court, and 
the lafl: Place he heW there, . which be faid re- 
lated to State Af&irs and the Minilfay^ 'twasr 
tbat be might have more 1 ime to follow hif 
Studies ^ and having afterwards Xfeifute for fqch: 
a Work, he undertook thid. He b^s follow'd 
Horace's Rule, in mingling thtVtite and the 
Dnlce together. His main De%n M^as |o Inr 
ttmdt^ and all the Reward he expeded for his 
Labour, was the Pleafure of having been fer* 
Vittahle to the PiiblicL Children have th« 
fame Obllgatton to him, a5 they have to their 
lathers who ta£ke care of thdr ]|dqcation^^ 
arid (hew them how to Tive in the- World 5 and 
Fathers may learn bete how to inftrqd theit 
Children, and teach them, to avoid thoft 
Rocks which fie in: their Way, and threate^ 
them with Dcftrudion. But , if n>e fhould faj^ 
aU that has baen fiud of this Avtbor^ and his Book^ 
fy hit CotttttfjMHin 4nd others^ m might tire the 


the Englifh traiidators Preface. 

RtaJer hefire he cofms at k: Far which Red-' 
fafy we omit mmth mare than has been faid al^ 
teaJbf ^ and' lanzH the WarJ( to /peak f^ i^ 
felf. ^ 



r • 

t • 

' I 

t HE 







* •{ \ 




•V • 


TH E tifc and Adventures df LdzjriHo de TormesL 
Written by himfelC Tranflatcd from the Ori- 
ginal ^anijhy and illuftrated with Twenty cu- 
rious Copper Cuts. In Two Parts^ ij^Tivelves. 

The Gentleman s DiHionan. Ui Three Parts , viz,. 
I. The Art of Riding the CJreat Horle; Containing the 
Terms and Phrafes tis'a in the Man^ge'^ and tlie Difeaf^ and 
Accidents of Horfes. II. The Military Att ; cxpl^iinih^ the 
Teriiw and Phrafes usTin Pield, orTjarifon : The Terms re- 
lating to Artillery: The Works and Motions of Attack and 
Defence, and the Pdftand Duty of Sea-Officers, &c. With 
Hiftoricat Escimples, taken from the Anions of our Armies. 
III. TheArt of Navigation; explaining the Tetms of Naval 
Afiairs; as Building, Riggings Working, and Fighting of 
iJhips ; the Poft and Dut^ of Sea-Officers, &c. With Hi- 
fiorical Examples, taken from the Aftions of our Fleet ; 
each Part done AlpAabetically, from the Sixteenth Edition 
ef die ©riginal French , publilVd by the Sieur Guillen ^ 
and Dedicated to the Dauphine: With large Additions^ 
Alterations and Improvements. Adapted to the Cuftoms 
and Ad^ions of the Englijh : And above Forty curious Cuts 
that were not in the Original. In OElavo. 

Of Wijdom. In Tliree Boote. Written originally in 
Prenchy by the Sieur de Charron : With an Account ot the 
Author. Made Englifh from the beft Edition. Correded 
and Enlarged by the Author, a little before his Death. By 
Gmjt-Srmhtfe.'fir. tTDcan cfCmgrbftfy, aM Cftiplain 
in Chrdinary to Her Majefty. Thd Second Edition : To' 
which is added, a krge Index to the whole. In Two Vo^ 
lumcs, in OBavo, 

A New Voyage to the Levant : Containing an Account 
of the moft remarkable Curiofities in Germany^ France^ 
Italy y Malta an^ Turkey : With Hiftorical Obfervations rt^ 
fating to the Prefent and Ancient State of thole Countries. 
By the Sieur iu Mom. Done inta Englijh ; and adorn d 
with Figures. The Fourth Edition. In OUav^. 






Firft BOOK. 

Cliap.T. /GUZMAN tiUs who dfU wba bl^ Fttber 9df} 

I -T dijmrpng by the hy rf Darker s gni Bdek^ 

^^^ hters ; <jf MncoHJcionnble TrsUerf • tf' nr^ 

Juiges \ 4j Tricked N^tdries ; 4ni 4f length ^ tdies Nkke^ 

Thdp twer-mce Vreffing if ill iff m W49ff4t$y' hii mrje in 4 

' Man. Page i 

Chap. II. Gu20ian £oes on mb dn Accmm j^ bis Puremsj mm 
fibs who Ins Mofber vds • defcriUng^ for our better Injfru* 
Siony the evil Condition and bad Quaiisies of a lemd Womkn ^ 
€f Bands ; of a Senfual and Lafcivums Man ; and concludes^ 
that dijhoneft torn is the Rsrin of a Masts Hononr, Efiasi 
and Idfe. 24. 

Chap. m. GuziJian leaves his Mothers Honfi^ andj ly th^ 

-p^ai^ difoourfes on the Tormenti ef Hunger : jlftenoards ho 

- tells yon vhat befel him mth an Hojtejsy reconntifig many no^ 

table Inflances of ill Government. 46 

Chap. IV. Guzman tells the Muleteer what bad befallen him 
with his Hofiefsy and refieEls $^n nnnecejfary Langhter^ 
.Then be teUs you Tnnjhort Tides ; One 4' a Covetom Fby/y- 
dan; and the other how Two Soldurs fervid Us Hofiefi • and^ 
at lafiy falls into a Learned Dlfceurje about fkrdojing of In- 
Juries. 57 

Cnap. y. Guzman tells how be and ■ the Muleteer eat jeveral 

Parts of ayotuig Mule, having it imposed sOfon them by bis 

Hefi at Cantillana/or f^tal: And afterward proceeds to fhew 

the many RafcaUy Tricks that wicked Hofisfut UfonpoorTra- 

'Vellers. '65 

Chap. VI. Guzman goes on, and tells how the ViUam of his HoJ 
i/Cantillana came to be difioverd ; and whdt s^terwards bo^ 
fel km and the Jaid.Hofi. '7? 

a Chap. Yll, 

The Contents. 

Oap.VIT. M*itt Jl^erMUM- fTf hire difconrjd ^ i and far 
tkta pffffi, * Sitry ttU tf the Gads of dncitnt Times. Then 
Gumum t»li-yttf hot be ViH ^prebeaded for a Thitf, Mid 
h whutAitMS ha eume to bt releas'd. Lajily, oae of the 
GetalemtB prwifit » t'^ * Storj, which yon htvt in the jeBoft- 
ng QiM^. Pat^c 79 

The Second BOOK. 

CktfX /^tlimtuit i» hit way frm Cualla n Madild, 

'^ ^ -'hehdStMtiiMdCuuUtimofiimiJtrahte 
tOeesfiiH tt Difcwr^ grmitly m-tht 
SiJMpr, C4lti in tht /iir, 4>U tbt Hh : 
ht etmi tojirvt /m Im^ptr, with the 
hat fort of People. P»^ 2^7 

■f hu Hafi, ojtd goti « htWftg tewardt 
wrv'dt ™ cOtttittHti that£mptrfmtMt j 
tr/irts^ faSi at la^ upm a tii^tm^ ^ 

^ „ 949 

Cb^ I)t Gmima.J^i bh mk his Difewrje agaia^ f^ain //«• 

' flOwr { and^ at lafl, comes te fpenk <^ Perfons in i$gh P^fis, 

m4 timr mm» ExtralHui. sa^ 

OvifklV. Gavmanpvesym a l»»g and mty DUenrfi, tfhif 

,,. . ^_ , ag^ the yi^yof I^otMr i tomhi^^ iy 

, theijy M the fHees of ServmN, SmpittptrSy Nttaties. Prth- 
: Sm, y«4$<r, Ati0tm,,^ii^Wrcanet, Phy^ijni akdlMii. 
m-g. a6^ 

Cb»p.V.Gvxaantiisf}»htfin/d aO)»ii^.hyaiaby, 
t«BU IMmA" W§& VpM jOwrW Prtftfioaf. m cwdamnt 
Cmut mLGmu/lin. /& r^aus a fmail Tb^t ef hit. 
He jijenfers the Ra^aerict of Stewards, Cooh, Sutlert^ and 
«ber fiuk-i^ CAetv ; dud aemnaiati ym hew *»/ith prtM 
Mr»^lfaaimmoafy lAus'i hy their Servamt. He AoAt ^ 
Kii^*t ^fitir luifiraUa State i and Jkws tie ya^ ef 
ft^nitm-f enm»dijig mb Sufenoart. Jit la^, ke a»Jtmni 
tioji Makers that ufe their Strvants ill, and leBi tie UlCtn* 

dp. VI. Qwimn»es w, mA tMi what j^f/dfa^'Je^ 
fPMif iffur «Kf ^ 3(f<(/rr, tiShtmt dijiu^d iit ferine. 

The C O K T I N T f . 

H€r^i9HmflH Spoils 0»i Tr^Pff^ f^S Ofkt ^ ^4^^ 4 

pU4^ Jf^^i^ilff U • fff5f«?». 

Ctop.VII, QwsE^n tAv mif the fdskn 4imjdni mk^s 

^m nfd4 mr^l Ji^fi^^m m M^mni. \f Im^ hy m^ns 
vt^p, yilj: Guiwafi t(Us hm ** ^nriv d ^t M44n4, dni jSr 

m^ifi Hnm^pufyt ^^fk^.4f length f^ttii^tlMQtj^ 
kf »^ fenui A fcttrvy Tricl at Malag;on»^ jao 

W mfte4s to jIm ^ he w^s I0ed fyr .^ $44i»^9 y^t rt^ 

k^d h fkf Qmmjf^. H^ f hence tales ^eciSm f» rcpq en 

^ 4mfif pf thiu an4 other Pefif ; and ^t l^ ^m^s t9 ^ak 

^ef )I9m^ M^my^ ^ th^ Qmji^nces ^ i(. 346 

V^ X. Qwf0nnjet4 f^th the pi/advantages rf ejte fm is 

dia^dmMs Fmntte^ 4^ hw d^i4t if if i»^ ^ w^ 

Mm fP fft iift9 any Emj4ywn(. He apquaiwtf jr?», hm 9^ 

Jnniid Iw Q^fm* Pffi^JTfi^sb hh fi^gwiri^sj ^4ter- 

W^dh h^ h f^am with him ^P weno^, »h§rf h^ diffb^gd 
hm immt¥4^% hi^ farmer Servtce^^ nmrl^ hfouf^ ef 
the t)4ifff9r4 h§ f^d A^ ^». 357 

'■ " ' iJ i i ii I ■■ Ml m I B, ! 

The Third BOOK. 

CWp- 1. /^UzuiaJi difcomjee ef Riches and Pcve^y, and the 

vJ EfeSti ejimh. Then he proceeds to uil hm he 

pas rqe^d by his JlelafiMS^ md what Tritl he M jdj^dhim 

wbde %e WfOi in f^fi ef them | ami ho» at lafi he took theRoai 

dire^ly temirdsSjoxn^. 371 

Chapjf. Qix«Xffj^fmbisfe$irneyt0ppardsKom€^difiottrfi 
Parfrmny, andg^od Mndfondsj i and as length tells you how, 
tfOft Us Arrivd a$ hiji Jewnm end^ he turtiA Beggar again ; 
and whas Infim&iens he had from an old Proidenty who com^ 
mamcaud to him the Lams and Ordinances of that Fratertusy, 
n^hich he ACfnai^syou with. 386 

Chap. Id* l^mauu teUsyon of Jeme nm Lavs heiearrid} and 
hew hewasferv'd for hegging as an mfeafoHaUe Hour^ a^ 
aftetrmarJalaagk^d ashy an M Proficient j v4)0 infiruSed-bim 
ietter: Thenm acamnti ym mh the daily PraSHfesAnd 


The CoNT f 1^ r $[ 

BxtrtiftUthif himfelf and his Companions, pfherehy tbtjfgof , 
' wlnrtppkhd to livt^not only plentifuOyj^t Inxtirioufy. Page 395 
Chap. IV. Guzman Difcoftrjes of Charity ^ and the many Benefit f 
cf'it. Then he tells, how he ca^f. to be relieved by a certdti 
Nobleman, v>ho thought his jiSl meritorious, Afteram^ds he 
* proceeds topTew »hat a free Life and Liberty a Bergar emoys 400 
Cnap.\V. Guanan hlls afirange Story ef one ^his ProfeffmrL 
and then proceeds to cry up a Beggars Life in Oppofrionto all 
• others. A$ length he acquaints you, hm he »asjervd as Gaeu 
f(n' ^Counterfeiting. ' • 40^ 

Chap. VI. Guzman difcourfes of Alms-grmng^andthemany Ad^ 
vantages af it : And then teHs you hew^pon ms returhto^l^cxciC 
and fatting to his old Trade ofBeggingJhe was taken in by a Car^ 
din^, pretending to have afore L^g, who order d him to be curd 
hy two Surgeons, who agreeing with him^. imposed on his Eminence^ 
and got a great deal ofMpmy. He laflly acquaints you how Joeing 
tur^,theQtrdinal took a fancy to him^nd made him hisPage^i 2 
Chap. VII. Guzman j!pf4)f/ of the many Changes in thk WOrld^nd 
laments his mn late Change of Life^ as not comparable to she 
Condition 0} a Beggar. He tells you fever al little Thefts of his • 
and at I aft acquaints you with one that he was fouhdly laJh*dfor^ 

with a notSteTheft of his, Vfhich had like to have co/i him his 
Place I "but his Eminence retain d him out of meer (Jharity, in 
hopes he might have an Opportunity to teach him better, and 
Prevent, if poffible^ his utter DefiruHion. ■': ' ^zy 

Cfiap. IX. Guzmsin fpeaks cf Charity in relation to the Cardinal- 
am thenjhews the Inconveniencies of Mafters being over'tigo^ 
rofts ani unkind to their Servants. He next tdlsyou another 
Thvft of his, and how well he came off. Afterwards he proceeds 
40*tieat of Gaming, andjhews the Kogueries (Jl >*- Here heteUs 
jtpUafani Story ; and at laftjhaving reconfmeruledfome Lasrsfor 
^Gamif^, acquaints you how he was difniifs'd the Cardinal*s Ser^ 
vice, and on what (Condition he was to return intd it,, - 436 

Cbap. X. Guzman goes into the Spani/h uimbajfadors Service j 
^and tells you what Tricks he playd there*, and above all,, one 
very plekfant one that he feH/i a Frenchman, ,and anotlkr 
thi^he playd a Coxdoudoi. • ; 453 

Chap. XI. .Tie AnK)U£ (if\Sount Falviano and* Elecmora. 
^ NoKl. V * ^ . . 462 


■ • r 

» \ 

. * ■ ' t •■ ^ , . .S . I 


Of the Famouf 


Gu^m^h d'Al&rache. 


Part 1 Bod& I. 



C H A R L 

Cuzman tetts vpho and what hfs Father was ^ aifi 
cowrfing hy the hj^ of Detractors and Backbiters ^ 
of Mncon/cionahie Traders^ of unluji Judges t^ of 
Jpickfd Notaries s, and atkngtbt^^ Notice^ That 
over-nice Drejfing k ill in a Woman, bnt mnje 
in a Man. 

IWds fo defirous, Courteous Reader^ to relate to 
thee the Adventures of my Life, that without 
allbwing my felf Latitude enough, I had like to 
have paffed by what is the very Bajts of itj the 
fooner to engage thee in the Reading my Story ; but 
over and above that it was altogether elientiil to my 

B Diicourfe^ 

« # * 

af The life and Mions Part I. 

Bife ou f fej I fliould thereby have expofed my felf to 
fome Sojfhij^ or other^ who would have been apt to 
have acculed me of not prpfeeding a Defafitione ad 
Definitum^ from the De^tion to the Yhing Defindi that 
is to fay, of not telling who my Parents were, and 
of ho^ uncertain an C&iiin, before I tame to fpeak 
of my felf. - *Tis true, 1 nave ^a great deal to fay on 
this tirft Head, sifi^ ^f W^?i^ J nund to enlarge into 
Particulars, might5^perh^ps,^aftora amore fatisfaAory 
Entertainment by fuch a Relation, than by any Ac- 
c6uiif I ckri give of my ovvn Anions } Biit I flisttcoi- 
tent rtiy felt with what innoft importanf, «nd" paft 
by the reft as either unneceflary or improper for me 
to t^. ''Let fome cih&r "fe^ Sqrupulous ft^fhn t)eat 
that Bufti for me 5 fiw my part, 1 care not fo far to 
participate of the Nature of the Hyena^ as to unearth 
the- Dead to procure my felf Suftenanee; and let mc 
tell you, as' tnere have never wanted Cemkrers in the 
World, f© no doubt ^my P«ren« ^ift never want 
Chroniclers. However, in the little I have to fay of 
them, you will poffibly be apt to imagine I fay too 
much, and be ready tfi c^ll me Fool or Blockhead 
for dwelling fo lon^ on' other People's Defeds, while 
I take lb little notice of my own. . This I allow to Jap 
true; yet give mele^ve to, procure my felf as good a 
Chara<9:er with you as I c^, fince certainly to boaft 
ef Wickednefs is mUchrWorfe than tobe really wicked. 
Ycfti ma& likewife belic^ie, if I acquififeeiti that Holy 
Commfiftid -which eoj(^s me to honour my Parents, 
it is becaufe I have Hopes their Frailties may conceal 
mine : Not that I have a mind to fecufe my Reputa- 
tion at the Expenpe of another Man's, though that be 
a common Thing to do, but only to render my Faults 
the more excufable, fince certainly ©ne difcovers ones 
own Weaknels whenever one expofes that of ones 
Neighbour. I own Slanderers are ever blameable ,; but 
I- hope that Crime wifl be never juftly imputed to 
me^ in regard of my Parents, fmte what I have to 
* ' ^ fay 

% of them will ke always ib artificially fet off, that 
whoever (hall read itj» will be apt to cry, BleffeJl^e the 
Man who hncoi^s fo ii^etl bov> to gUfs the Crimes of hit Afk- 
ttfoTs. Neycrthelefe, to (peak truth, their Story is (b 
well Icnown, and their Adiions have made fo great at 
Noife In the World, that 'twbuld be mecr madne(5( 
in me to go dbout to excu(e them^ and therefore 
to do them the greater Service, or rather Juitice, I 
tnuft relate all Matters concerning them according to 
the very Text, wherein, however, Ifliallgive die Lie 
to(evcral Commentators upon tneir Lives, who, as 
often ds tJiey have had occaiion tp nientiori themy 
have never failed to add (cveral Aiticles of their owrt 
fnventiori, which have always been to their Di(ad« 
Vantage, but neter to their Credit. Thus the great* 
^ft part of the World goes, and thus it fell out with ^ 
d Gentleman, si Stranger, who I my felf knew at 
^inL He was a greait Lover of Horfes, hiving 
two the fine(t for Shape thatt could be imagin'dl 
Thefe he would have willingly tranfported to his owrf 
Country, but it being again(t the Law, herefolvedto 
Jiave therti pointed, that he might at leaft have the 
Satisfa&ion of ihewing their Pi^&res to his Friends, 
For this purpo(e, he had reeourfe to two of the moft 
Famous Painters at that time in this City; to eSch of 
whom he gave a Hor(e to Paint, promifmg, whoever 
ftould excell the other, (houlcf, over and above the 
ftipulated Price, have a generous Gratuity. The two 
l^ainters (et to Work, and one painted tile Smtl fd 
^wonderfully fine, that there wanted pnly Life dm 
Motion to make him a real Horfe; ^nd he ha4 kept, 
the Likene(s (b well, that a Man could hairdly diftin- 
guifh the Copy from the OriginaiL The other drew 
*he Dapple-Grey^ Which indeed w^s, in the main^ i 
fine Piece, but Came far (hort of the 6tfaer in Pef* 
fedion. . This fainter, however^ excelled in ond 
thing J for having placed hh Horfe in ain open Couil-t 
^, he ifeprefented under hich &m t^ndic^ii ve^ 

4 The life and Mim Baitl 

nerable Rfiins, Superbe Antiquities, and divers good 
Pieces of Modern Archite<aure, and over him he 
drew fome fine Skyfchapes. All about him he left 
Shrubs, Meads, and fmall Water-falls : Hard by, and 
in the comer of the Piece, he hung all manner of 
Horfe-Fumiture^ on the decayed Trunk of a Tree, 
placing a Huntmg-Saddle at the foot of it, which, 
for Workmanftiip fcarce had its Equal, Thefe two 
Pidures thus finifh'd, the Gentleman who employed 
the Painters liked the Performance of the firft beft^ 
as he had a great deal of Reafon to do, paying him 
not only what he had agreed for, but making him 
.withall a liberal Prefent of a fine Ring. The other 
Painter obferving how generoufly his Rival had been 
dealt by, and conceiving a far greater Opinion of 
himfelf, demanded an exceffive Rate for what he had 
done j which the Gentleman being furpriz'd at, ask'd 
him how he could require io much, fince he law 
What he had juft then given for a Piece that was of 
much greater Value ? As for my Brother's Horle^ an- 
iwered this Painter, I have nothing to fay to it, it 
may be it may excel mine ^ but, fure 1 am, my Land- 
ichapes and Ruins deferve alone more than all his 
Pidure, As for your Landfchapes and Ruins, replied 
the Gentleman, 1 had no occafion for them, we have 
enough of thofe in our own Country ; all I defired was, 
a true Reprefentation of the Horle I gave you to 
Paint, which, fince I could not carry away in the 
Original, I had a mind to ihew to my Friends in a 
good Copy, The Painter replied, A Horfe only in 
luch a large Piece as you required of me, would 
have had but a very poor EiFed, and therefore I was 
•obliged tQ accompany him with feveral Ornaments 
.and Accidents that might fet him off. Alfo, I thought 
So fine a Beaft, Without Bridle and Saddle ready to put 
.on him, would look as mean as z Beau withoMt his 
JEquipage, or a fine Lady without her ToiUu Now I 
have taken fo^reat Pains,. proceeded he, about this 
.. . .: Bridle 

Bode 1 of Guzimn d Wacache. 5 

Bridle and Saddle^ by Embroidering, and th? like, 
that if ten times the Money you gave the other Pain- 
ter were laid down for diem, it would not above half 
ahfwer their Value, The Gentleman hearing all this 
Bragadochio iaid. and having already the Pidure 
he defked, told him frankly. Sir I required only a 
well painted Horfe from you, for which I am ready 
to pay you what you can defire in Reafbn j but as for 
your Horfe Furniture, your Ornaments and your Ac- 
cidents, I have no occafion for them, and therefore 
defire you would difpofe of them to. fome other Per- 
fon. The Painter hearing what he was to trufl to^ 
and finding the Xrentleman refblved upon what he 
faid, was fain to lower his Price,, and take what he 
could get. 

How many People have we now a-days like tlw 
Painter, who for their over-doing have been no bet- 
ter recompenfed. A plain fimple Horfe is only re- 
quired of them, and tbcy give you him Bridled and 
Saddled. If you defire any one to tell you a Story, 
he'll beifiiie to lard it with fbme trifling Digreffions of 
his owil, the better, as he'l acquaint you, to fet it offl 
No Horfe, though painted, can be in order, accord- 
ing to diefe Story-Tellersi without a Bridle and Sad- 
dle. This is my Father's Cafe, whole Life has been 
impofed upon by Commentators, who will ever be 
varying from the Truth : It is the Mode to do fo ; 
ana you fhall hardly come into any Company where 
fomebody or other is not flander'd. Scarce any body 
is fparedl When you come in, you fhall be loaded 
with Compliments and Civilities; and before you go 
out, be torn to pieces with Flattery, or downright 
Railing. My Parents were honefl enough, though 
againfi: whole Reputation there might poflSbly be 
fomediixig to be faid, as there is againft moft People s. 
Who can be fo happy as not to be talk'd of ? You 
may imagine, if I had been to chufe what part of the 

B 3 Blood 

f . The life and MieiK :: ."Bifcl 

Blood oi Adam I would have defdotid^d frothy it 
fhbuld have gone hard but I would have pitched upon 
the pureft. But dus is not a Matter in 6ttr Choice^ 
we muft not he our own Carvers ; every d>ie nraft b^ 
content with what Lot has been affign'd hiih. He 
that has fore-orddined thefe Things kneW well what 
he did^ and 'tis not for us to difpute it. Be his Name 
for ever b^fled. If it pleafed him^ I ftould have 
natural Failings^ yet were I well defcended^ for La 
Sangrefe bereda^ j tl Viciofe aft^a^ Blood is by Inherir 
tance, whereas Vice is Adventitious. He that is what 
he ought^to be, ihall be looked upon as he is, and 
not be obliged to anfwer for the Iniquities of his 

As for my Fathpr and Anceftors, they wef e Natives 
of the Levant* They can» to lettle at Qenody and 
were ingrafted with the Naikfe^ for which ftewm I 
iBiall term them Gencefesy tho' in truth they wer^ 
not born in that Country. Their Employqient was 
fuch as is generally pradifod by the Gentry of that 
tComniohwealtb, ^iz,. Exchanging of Momes to ail 
parts. This got them fome Refl^ons, and indeed 
(they were a little accufed of Ufiuy. They have 
often been reproached with this Vice to their Fapes, 
but they were a patient, peaceable, mild fort of People, 
and took no Qotice of it. When a Man does well, 
he need not to Value what is laid of him^ and every 
Body knows this Trade has been always allow'd^ andf, 
for ought I know, ever will be. |t is every where 
jpradifed, and, perhaps, on account of our Sim,' more 
here thati elfewhere. But what I can never away 
with, i)pr pretend to vindicate, is the Cuftomr- of 
lending Money upon Pawns with exceffive Inteipeft, 
which in a little time^ if the Pledge be not with* 
iirawn, j(hall eat it up, and 4:oftjG!ime it. This! know is 
praaiife4 every Day, but which does not mafce^it left 
yillanous. Aizother ion of Roguery thwe:i$> c4Ue4 

t ^ darn- 


BookX of Guzman d^Aliurache. 7 

* CamInQ SecOy or a dry kind of Ex^ *CambioScco,«r^ 
cbai^iy which finds nothing to an- ^fiifyMfn^M&^ 
fwcrit. Thefemuft needs be 4own- 'iT/y^mu 
ridit Cheats, for we hear the Voice /,^' Antwc^ tl 
of Jacob y but feel the Hands of Beztnfon in Lp- 
Efau. Though my Parents were ac- win, whin then 
cufcd of thefe and the like Vil^ «»/f^' «• Jf«^ 
lanies, yet I proteft, I never faw '^ZTZ'Jni 
any fuch Thing by them, and rmitted n Gtnoa 
for that Iteafbn : can abfolve them t^tfy t^gam Hm 
in my Confcience. As for what f^ Psynma. 
generally ffoes by the Name of Exchange^ it may 
>e pra&ifed either one way or the other, mat is, well 
or ill^ and therefore I am not furpriz d if fbme Peo- 
ple are reflected upon for their ill Pradices that way ; 
but what aftoniihes me isj that Peribns (hould oe 
ilandered right Or wrong^ becauie they deal in a Me- 
thod that is (bmetimes liable to Cenfure. 'Tis true, 
if I faw a Religious Perfon ^nter a Houfe at Mid- 
night through a Window, with a naked Sword in his 
Hand, and a Buckler at his <jirdle, I could not ima- 
gine that Perfon was going to confeis any Sick Body. 
But for fiich a Man as my Father, who prayed 
daily^ frequented Religious Exercifes, Communicated 
duely every Month, and Cpnfeffed himfelf as often 
as there was occaHon ; to think, I fay, that fuch a 
Perfon would be guilty of Hypocrify, or the Villan- 
ous Praftices we nave been fpeaking of, were down- 
right Injufiice and Calumny. I can alTure you on 
my Word, he had a large Rojary of Fifteen compleat 
Sedions, out of which he was taught to Pray, I 
mean, in the Sfanijh Tongue, and a great Cbaplet of 
Beads, whereof each was as big as a Hazle-Nut j and 
now, to fulped fuch a Man ! Thefe my Mother gave 
him, which Ihe in like manner had received, (rom hers. 
This Hi^/iry, I can fafely fwe^r, was leldom or never 
out of his Hands ; however, no Bpdy , can truly 
judge of ch« H^art of Man but Gqd, yet yw flipuld 

B'4 lee 

8 theijfeay Battt 

fee hitij eveiy Morning at A&/}, devoutly kneclmg 
on both Kneps, with his Eyes caft up to Heaven^ 
his Hands lifted up and croued upon his Breaft^ and 
then you fiiould hear fuch Ejaculations and Sighs fly 
irbrii his Mouth, as were alone fuflScidnt to inlpire all 
jairbund hith with true and flaming Devotion. But 
Sl^nder^when it has a n?iind to attack any Body^does not 
ftick to do it even at the foot of the Altar ; and I know 
not how many reproachful Things, were faid of him. 
bpon this Occafion : Yet let good and difintercfted 
People judge how perverfe andrafli it is to pais fo un- 
Ibh^iritable a Cenfure on One that appeared fo truly 
Religious. AU this unkind and unjuft Ufage which 
he had from the Inhabitants of Genoa, made him re- 
lolve to leave that Place; which he at length did, ta- 
king occafion for his Departure, frOm the Breaking 
of one of his Correfpondents at Sevil^ with whom he 
was but two much engaged. He embark'd then^ 
with defign to go and find that Perfon but j but die 
Ship, wherein he was, being taken by the Gorfairs^ he 
Was made a Slave, and carried with ^11 that were 
with him to Algiers. Now was my poor Father at his 
Wits ends, very difconfolate, you may imagine, to 
think he had not only loft his Money, but his Liber- 
ty to bbop. His Fortune, neverthelefs, was to fall into 
the Hands of a Rich old Tatrony who had a young 
and handfome Wife. My Father, as you'll find by 
the Sequel, was both well made, and had fly infinua- 
ting Ways ^ith hjim, which fuflSciendy won on his 
TatrofK who put Entire Confidence in nirrt; Vet had 
no lefs Jnfltience on- his Miftrels and Patronefi^ I will 
not trouble you with the Particulars of this' laft Af- 
fair, my Father having never thoroughly acquainted 
me with them ; all I think proper to tell you Js^- That 
after jst Y6ars Slavery, his Tatron happening to die, his 
Miftrefs propofed to marry him, and give him all flie 
had gbt by her Husband's Death, provided he would 
J3BP ma Tffri. This was ^^reat Trialfor him tp i«&- 

i k« If i- .■•>.. / ...... ...*,•»*» ^ J * ♦ i 

Book L of Giiztnkn d'Alfarache. : j> 

dergO) but believe me, I have known Several for lefi 
Advantage run thkt Rifque, and I could brin^ 
you divers Examples, if I pleafed, of that kind, ai3 
thofe of our own Times ; for it has of late been but 
too common for Men to make their Fortutjes ^t the 
Ex|>ence of Heaven* 'Tis true, my Father "w^s a grek 
Religionift, and perfedly Devout, but then he was afc 
jUgiers aSlavc^ and, that for ought he knew, during his 
Lffe. On the other hand, he faw his Miftrefs both Rich 
and Beautiful, and tho' the Step he was to take 
was terrible, it was neverthelefi flippery. In fhort^^ 
he complied with her Requeft, but tho' he con- 
fenced to turn Turk^ he refolved not to die fo. It was 
onfy to better his Fortune j aod how many have 
we now a^ays that would do the fame on a lefs Ad- 
j:ount. How nlany are there, I lay, that to fecure 
their Fortunes, 6r - acquire better, make a fliew of 
one Religion, whilft in their Hearts they are of a 
contraiy Perfwafioni I kiiOw this is generally con- 
demned, and, it may be, with Reafon, but it is never- 
thele& commonly praftiled. Intereft is a ftrange 
thing, my Father was ever fubje<a to it frdm his Cra- 
dle, and indeed it was the Lsr or Houfliold-God of 
his Family. I have ^ften heard him talk of that Ge^ 
nerjition; for, thanks to my Stars, I never knew them. 
He would, I fay, for Converfatiotf s fake, often teB 
me, they were a fort of Animals who loved to get 
whar they cOuld, but would part with nothing : That 
Mdth them Oathis and Lies coft little, efoecially where 
they were to deny any thing hiaid' been entrufted 
to them : That they took a great deal of Paiijs to 
fee diemfelves paid whatever was due to them,but never 
cared to, pay any Body what they themlelves ow'd : 
That they loVd to gain, and Ipend freely, elpecially 
where 'twas at another^fi Coft^ but tho* they got 
Money by Wholefale, they never lent it out but by 
Driblets, and that at exceffive Intereft, and upon go6d 
Pawns, which w(»re foon eat out by it. In a word. 
i »•'•>*> *• •'• **.-.<. .. they 

%o The life and ABiofti ^ . Firt I 

Nthey never parted wkh any thing they had got^ thoT 
never (o unjuftly^ unlefs they were forced to it} and 
fometimes too^ they had the better of die Law by 
che generous Fees they gave their Gouncil. , Many 
more of thefe kind of Gallantries he told me of them^ 
which I omit^ as being nothing but what has boefi 
pradiied before^ and wUl ever be^ I believe^ as long 
as the World lafts* But to return tp my Fathei^ 

The News of his being taken. by the Turks no 
looker came to Qenoa, but it was known at Sivil^ 
where his Rogue of a Correfpondent having notice 
of it^ he greatly rejoiced^ for he was his principal 
Creditor : and having thus got rid of him^ he doubted 
hot but loon to get clear of the reft. For this piu^ 
poie he fet about a fmallComporitionj as is cuftomary 
for Bankrupts tp do^ which, however, was eafily ac- 
jCepted } and having fome Money left, he foon paid 
oft every Body but my poor Father, whom he do- 
iign'd never to pay, though he ow'd him more than 
ttn of ^hem together. Being thus, as he thought^ a 
dear Man, he began to (et up for Trading a-new, 
itho* all his EfFeds were owing to other People s 
LoiTes. My Father, who had ever this Villain in his 
Thoughts, ibujght all Opportunities to write to Spsm^ 
that he might hear \yhat was become of him^ and at 
length he received Advice that he had ended his Matters^ 
tnd was become a new Trader, having greater Bufi- 
qeis than even This was fo far from nettling my 
^Father, that he gready rejoiced at it, fuppofing mr 
that Means one time or other to get himfelf paia, 
.and wherein he was not difappoidted^ 'Tis true, he 
had turn'd Turh^ and married a ^or, but that did 
.pot* trouble him, for he looked upon himfelf nevei: 
.the more a Aiabojnetun fojr. wearing a Turhatit. He 
doubted not but to make up all thofe Matters with 
his' Wife^s Money, which he defign'd to carry off as 
foon as he could. With this View. be. told her be- wgs 
Y : ; 4efu:oqs 

ddkousto Tride } aod that as t^art of her Pof tune 
hy in Laacb^ it wai biit i:eaiQiiabfe Ihe ftoiild tnrA U 
lato Mofley for that end She eafily coo^ented^ and 
ib haying got dll her Portables in a readinefls^ his next 
Buimefs was to find ^ honeft Chriilian Capt^> 
vrho^ Out of confideration of his Misfortone^ might 
d^er him from his Apoftacy^ by CFanfporeing hint 
to his own Cppntry, He Inckily lit onan Engl^of/, 
who thoT be was perfwaded of the fmcerity of hi^ 
lataaiom to retnm into the Bofom of Ids Mothers- 
Churchy yet demanded of him ifooo Che^mns for that 
pie«:e' of Service, if he <Ed it for him. MV Father 
offer'd him leo, but the Captain told him, he eould 
not ran the rifoae of lofing his life Md Veflel foi: 
fo liak, and to he wa^ obliged to give him 4o6, 
The Bargain thus ftrack, and right Meafures takenf^ 
my Father embarked on board his Skiff, for it ws^ 
no better, and before any Difcovery was made of 
their Departure, the^ were got half oref to Malaga, 
where they foon after arrived* This was a proper 
Plaoe for my Father to land at, becaufe he had not 
from thence above 30 or 49 Leagues to Sevil; whl^ 
ther he was impatient to go in queft of his Bankrupt 
At tii^ Imding, his firft Thought was to get recon* 
dled to the Church, which he had offended by his 
Apoftacy, and therefore he immediately went t6 
ibme Mmks of his Acquaintance, to whom, you may 
imagine, he did not give an imperfect Account of his 
^very ^ Sufferings, for he was naturally £l6qijeiic, 
«nd a good Comedian. In fhort, he ib far touched 
the t^ious Fathers with his Tears and lamentable 
^tory, that he foon obtained Abfolution for his Crime, 
and was again received into the Arms of the Church! 
jBekig got rid of an Affair of fo great importance. 
Ills nett Thoughts pointed 4ire<5fly towards Sevil, 
whither he foon after came altogether unexpeifted 
Jjy his Correlpondent, who was not a little (iirprifed 
^d ^e hiftv next ftiorning at Ins £f^&^ drefs'd more 

It TheUfeand Mioh5\ Partt 

like a Gentleman^ than a Slave. The News of my Fa- 
ther s Apoftacy had got long before him to Stvil, 
l^nd therefore the Correfpondent^ upon firft fight of 
him^ could not but believe him to be a Spirit in 
that Form; however he was foon recovered irom his 
'AftoniOunent by my Father*s demanding an j^ccount 
jfrom him^ but as they had had long Commerce together, 
which was interwoven with a great deal of Roguery 
pn both fides^ and which does not ufe to be entred 
pn Tradci^ Books^ he had a great Advantage of my 
fj^^y^Vi by denying abundance of Shares in Villany 
whiph ^ere nevermelefs due to him. Even among 
Thieves there's a Religious Obfervation of Ibme m>- 
•warrantabip Things ; but this Rogue was worle than 
a Thief in thAit particular^ for he would own nothing 
but what could i>e proved againil Mm.' At length, 
af|:er many Papers Tro and Con, Receipts given and 
t^kerxy Demands and Replies^ Reproaches^ hard 
Words and Returns^ an Accomodation was agreed 
upon^ that my Father ihould lofe a confiderable deal 
of what he demanded. Of. any precious Liquor 
ipilt^ we muft recover what we can. My Father 
was well advifed at Malaga, whtn he was told he 
muft rid himfelf of the Itch of Algiers, otherwife he 
jhad not got a Penny of this Dogy who was Rogue 
enough to have given the Fathers of the Iw/uifyum 
jxalf of the Debt to have difpatched him out or the 
way. But fince this was not in his Power, what Re- 
jpor ts did he fpread about the poor Man through 5^- 
fvil ? What a Noife did he make of the two times that 
he broke, which indeed were not without Fraud; but 
where are the Merchants that can always honourably 
^^cquit themielves under this Misfortune ? Is this Pra^ 
'dice of repairing one's ihatter'd Fortune at andther^s 
* Expence fo new in the World ? No, it is nothing among 
[Merchants, and nothing has always been (6 common; 
jfofthey eafily make one another amends bjf recjpro- 
jialFaiiingi If if were fogreftt 9 Qtm^ a* |oi»5 

BooH. 0/ Giustnin d'Al&rache: i 3 

may imagiheji woidd not Juftice^ think you^ ibon ftop 
the Progrefs of it ; buty on the contrary, we fee e^ 
very Day one or other break, and for one that is 
puniflied, a thoufand go fcot-free ? And now pray 
whence do you think all this comes ? Is it not, that 
thet Bankrupts have Money enough to clqg the courid 
of Juftice, by feeing thole that are ffo punifh them i 
What is not to be done with Money? You heed 
not wonder at this lb much, for it is what is prac^fed 
every Day, and thisre are thofe that make a Trade of 
it. (jooa God ! Youl cry, but what can* they pre- 
tend to the Confeffor ? Why the fame they do te the 
Courts of Juftice. Give him but Money,and he will find 
ibme way or other to excufe you, God alohe will not fiif« 
fer himfelf to be either corrupted or deceived ; but as for 
Confeffon, they refer the Matter to the other Worlds 
and leave the Criminal by his Crime to live fplen- 
didly in this. He may probably have time to repent 
and implore Mercy, and that's all the Care is taken 
of him. Believe rae^ of all the Ads of a good Chri- 
ilian, Reflitution is what is leaf): pradifed. A Man 
fliall live well as to other Particulars, give Alms, re* 
lieve the Oppreffed, comfort the Sick, and the like; 
but when you come to demand of him what has been 
ill got, he turns his Peaf-Ear to you. Tell him but 
his Father or his Unkle have uied indired and un- 
lawful Means to procure an Eflate he is in PolTeffion 
of ; that they got their Caufe more by Intereft than 
Right; and let him be never fo much a Zealot, he 
wiU not be moved at fo unwelcome an Haranguef. 
And then as to Reputaci(»n, which is a Thing that 
ought to be valued next to Life, who is there that 
takes care to reftore it after they have taken it from, 
one ? No Body, certainly ; for every one dies a Liar, 
as he h^ Uvd:a Slanderer. This they /look upon as 
a TriflBj a ftroke of Wir, a foft Revenge, a War 
withput Blood-ftied ; and^ jna Word, a Thing that is 
to be given and taken reciprocally without Ofienceu 
But let s return to Ipeak of jny Father. I 


14 / "The tIfeMnlMm\^ itlkrtt 

( I caa h9r% Ccr^ve him the c^ Breaki^ 
mentioned^ although he was my Father ; for if I am 
a Friend to "PUto^ I muft be more fo to Trudi. Con- 
fiDrming m^ felf therefore tb^that Saying of the Phi- 
lofop^er^ The World muft ekcufe me if I tfabk diis 
Crime a greater than thit on die Highway^ and 
more worthy of Punifhment. Hold, cries one of 
thefe Gentlemen, who begins to find himfetf fitun^^^ 
ybu are coo forward, me thinks. Sir;. Pray Wdeiredid 
you reiid that tlus was fo great a Orimei in what 
Attdior, I befeediyou ? Will fuch an Ideot, Gally- 
Slave, and Hang-^Eiog as yon, 4)retend to make Laws 
for others, when you deferve the worft of Poniftments 
for your own Crimes ? Not fo faft, I prithee. Good 
Friend^ replylj If lamanywaystoljlameinthisParti- 
pidar, itismeerly becaufelhaveiiretended to give LeC- 
fonstofiichas will never receitethetn, neither frcnnme 
nor any Body elfe. I would patiently endui:e all the 
ill Names yoii are pleafed to give me, which to my 
Misfortune are but too juft, iil could but apply the 
leaft Remedy to your Crimes, that is, have got you and 
my Father fairly hang'd, as you very well defertr'd. 
But let the Matter go as it will, fince, as yotx lay, 
it is none of my BuHnefs to make Laws ; and fince^ 
there are Crimes, of as great Importance, whith need 
refomling as much as this. Let the Perfons, whofe 
Employment it is, take care of thit j for my partj, \ 
will fay no more of it at this time. 

My Father's Correfpondent did not content him- 
felf with abufmg him only on the Score of thefe two 
Breakings j but, through a Diabolical Spirit of Ven- 

fpance, went about to reveal an Affair which had 
e«i laid to fleep with Money, and Which related to 
the counterfeiting of a certain Bill of texchange, 
wherein, as we fey, he w^s to have the Alcalde or 
Judge for his Father, and the l^otary for his Qod* 
father. Now, among many other excellent Qualities 
my Father was Mailer of, you mufl know one, an(i 

#% . - that 

that none of the le^^ was^ that he cotilcl coun^ 

terfeit Hands to a Miracle* This you may imagiaQ.. 

was no eafy Thing to do^ but he had ft ai unptmu 

What induced him to it, was the many Perplexities het 

lay under^ arid which came fo thick upon him, and 

all of a fudden, that he was forced in a manner to 

feek out for Money to ihield him againfl the Sword 

of Juftice^ His Plot however did not take, he was 

dUcovered in his Roguery ; and, to fare himlelf finom 

Puniihment, was fam to give the Akatde and Notaiy 

eadi of them a good Purle of Gold, which drained 

bimfb much, that he was obliged at laft to Break again. 

*ris true he had fome advantage by Breaking, having 

the iiic, or I might better fty. Propriety of other 

People's Money for nothing ^ but then he had like* 

wife fbme Lofs too, for his going off was not alto* 

gether fo fraudulent, but he had caufe to repent of 

itj and had perh^ ibme region to exclaim againft 

both the Judge ajid Notary. As for Judges, there are 

both good and bad among them j but for Notaries, 

good God ! where are any to be found that acquit 

themfelves honeftly in that Calling ! I muft hereupon 

teH you a Story. One Friday in Lenty a certain Prea-r 

cher whom I went to hear at St. Giles s Church in Ma-^ 

dridy where he Preached before the Grand Council^ 

happening to (peak of the Officers of Juftice, begaf»^ 

wjth the Cbirf-Jufiiciy and came down to the Notary^ 

whom he referv d for die laft j ^^ See here, faid he, my 

'^Chariot fticks, it will not move a jot further for the^ 

^ Mud and Mire that furrounds it ; and unlels aa^ 

^ Angel from Heaven is once more pleafed to deicenil 

^^ and difturb the Water, I know not how % (hall get 

^^ out of this Whirlpool. I muft needs lay. Gentle^ 

^ men, added he. That for thefe 50 Years that I have 

^^ been a Confeflbr, I have not known one of the 

^ many Thoufands I have Confefled, except fome 

^^ few Notaries^ but who, tho' he might have ro- 

f turn'dT ievetal times to his Sins,, has at length, 

*^ through 

^^ through the Grace of God, ft) thoroudily reform'd 
^ hisXife, as to become a new Man. The Wencher 
'^"^ has in time come to a Senfe of his Folly, in keep- 
^'^ ing a Baggage that Nos'd hiqi* , The Gamefter 
^* is reclaim'd from his Paffion for Play/ by being con- 
^ vinced he is made a Property of by fome Perfons that 
*^ are more expert at it than himlel£ The Thief, • or 
*^ Robber, quits a.t length his infamous Life, either 
^^ through Shame, or the fear of a Jlalter. -^ The Slan- 
*^ derer hearkens to thewholibme Advice is givenhim 
^^ by his Friends, and leaves off Railing. The haughty 
^^ prQud Man becomes at laft lenfible of his human 
^^ Infirmities, and allows he is nothing but Organized 
*' Clay. As for the Liar, the bare Turpitude of that 
^^ Vice Aiakes him to quit it, as well as the many Affronts 
^^ and Hiffes he undergoes daily on that Account* 
^^ Laftly, The prefumptuous BIa^h«ner is reform'd 
*' from his horrible Impiety, either by the Reprehen- 
'^ fions of his Kindred or Friends. In a Word. I 
^^ h^ve known of all thefe Sinners that have bid fair 
^^ for Heaven, and fhew'd confiderable Inftances of 
^^ Amendment. But for iSfotariesy Good God! of 
^^ whom fome few have fallen into, my Hands, I have 
'^ not met with one who has difcovered the leaft To- 
^^ ken of Repentance. They are to Day what rfiey 
^^ were Yefterday, and will be to Morrow, and to 
'^ Lives end, what they have been ever been 
*^ from their Births j that is, the fame Rogues ftill. 
^^ I know not who their Cpnfeffors are, and cannot 
*' but wonder how any Body can give them Abfolu- 
*^ tion. They not only live 111, but praAice Wicked- 
^ nefs inceffantly. For two i)ucats they'l write what- 
*^ ever you'd have them, though it extend to the 
'^ greateft Injuftice, and never let a he or fhe Crimi- 
'^ nal fuffer, if they have but Money to ballance their 
^^ Crimes. They rob this good Man of his Honoar 
and Eftate, and that innocent Perlbn of his Life ; 
*' and for a few Pence, will make even the greateft 

A !.' Offender 


Sook t of Guzman d^AIiarachc- i ^ 

/ Offender appear blamelefi. They are luch infatiabltf 
/ Hunters after other Men's Properties, that they 
/ hardly leave them, that have the Misfortune to have 
/ to do with them wherewithal to keep the Wolf 
^ from the Door j and have moreover fuch a knack 
^^ at converting anothers Subftance into their own, 
'' that I believe the very Devil himf elf oowid not wreft it 

from them. AH this makes me apt to think, if any 

rf thefe Harpies Ihould have the happinefs to be 
^ fav'd, (which, nevertheless, I look upon to be next 
^^ to ImpoffiHlity) the Angel that guards the Gate of 
^^ Paradice would give the Word to his Brethreif 
*^ withiii,That they fkould n^ake more than ordinary Re- 
'^ joicing, for that a Notary was come to Heaven \ 
Here the Preacher ended his Moral Reflediony 
and prooeeded to the Application, whiph I fiiaU 

Thefe Netaries^ to exciife themfelves for aill thefe 
ill Praftices, will tell you, the World is not now as it 
Ivas formerly j that now-a-days People muft live sis 
they can_, fmce they cannot do fb as they would j 
that Expences become greater every Day, and nev^ 
Taxes are fiK:ceffively invented to burAwi us* with. 
They will likewife let you know diey had not their 
Places for nothing, and therefore may be redbnably 
allowed feme by-ways to reimburfe themfelves ; and 
tefides, theyl above all acquaint you how many Va^ 
cations there are in the Year, and that they (houldftarve 
if they were not fometimes well paid for their Work. 
How unhappy and miferable is the Condition of a 
Maa, when ne is forc'd to make ufe of fuch weafk 
Realons to palliate fo great Crimes ! 

Let us next come to the Judges, wfro are fuppofed 
to give nothing for their Places, and therefore cah-^ 
not have the fame Excufes the JJi)r^my bring, in cafe 
they fhouldbe fuchRafeals as to have occafibn for them. 
Now of a!l the Rocks that are in this iSea of the 
Worldy ^ft>r the World in fome Meafure may be pr6- 

1 8 the Life $nd ABions > ^*irt L 

perly faid to be a SeaJ none are fo apt to Shipwreck 
one as thefe Judges Pofts. A Man that accepts any 
of them^ had need to examine himfelf well before I 
he enters upon his Office, for when he is once in, he | 
is apt to do as his Predeceffors have done before him. 
Judges are in Stridnefs God's Vicegerents, or rathef 
Earthly Gods themfelves. But, good Heaven ! What ' 
Gods of this kind have we now-a-days upon Earth ! 
To be convinced, we need only examine after what | 
manner Juftice is now adminiftred. We need only | 
fee,, whether any Caufe, Civil or CrimiEal, be now ! 
judged according to the Rules of Reaibn and Juftice ; 
or whether Intereft, Revenge, or fome &ch-Uke 
fmifter Ends, have not the greater Share in its Deter- 
mination. How terrible a Thing is this to refled 
upon, and how little are thefe Men acquainted with 
thofe they prefume to reprefent ! How much Blood 
and Injuftice have they to account for before the 
King of Kings, whom they have this way not a lit- 
tle offended ! How much Money have they to re- 
.ftore to thofe they have fo egregioufly wronged! 
Thefe are fo many Truths, as a Chriftian can never 
doubt of, and which can never offend any. but fuch 
. as- have renounced that Name. What ! fhall the Life, 
'Honour, Eflate, Fortune,, or Quiet of a Man, be en- 
tirely at your Difpofal, becaule it has pleafed God 
.and your Prince to let you be the Judge of them ac- 
cording to Equity, and Juftice J and yet will you pre- 
fume to pronounce your Decifions wholly out of a pri- 
vate Peke,particulax Intcreft,or unaccountable Inclina- 
tion ? A Caufe that, you might have ended in 
24 Hours, will you extend to as many Years, pure- 
; ly becaufe you have fome By-end, or are affraid to 
. oifoblige fome great Lord who has recommended it 
to you ? A poor Wretch that you have kept for ma- 
ny Years in Prifon, Ihall be nltreated, abufed and 
negleded, becaufe he has no .Body to folicit for him, 
. nor Money to bribe your Injuftice j when at the fame 


%!• fj 

it I. of Giizman d* Alfar ache i § 

time, another, who is a thoufand times more guilty^ 
fliall be proteAed by you for his Pence againft all 
Evidence and Verdids. Is this, Gentlemen Judges^ 
what you cill" doing your Duty ? It were well for you 
if the World were Eternal,, as fome have falfly 
dreamt, or that you might never die, for whenever 
you do, you 11 have a fine -Account to give to your 
Maker. . Vou 11 have a fine Account, I fay, to give of 
your Extortions, Bribes, . falfe Judgments, Cruelties^ 
and the like, which an evorlaftirig Gulph of Sulphur 
can only recorapence, and Hell-fire duly rewards 
Thefe are not Fables, Gentlemen, that I aflert to 
you, but eternal Truths, which are as inunutable and 
durable as. the Divine Being. 

But let's lay no more of thefejudges, for if wefhould 
pretend to go through. with their Crimes, a. large 
Volume would hardly contain ihem, and which, for 
its Prolixity, might juftly . deferve to be burnt, as 
well as the Subjects of it. Let it fuffice to affirm 
in one Word, That ahnoft whaitever belongs to them 
i$ Criminal. They are, 'tis true, the Expounders of 
the Law, but how they do it, every Day convinces 
us. A certain Peafant, who folicited hard a Soit aC 
Granada y which his Parifh had with the Lord of the 
Place, coming one Day into the New Squarty ftood 
gazing at the Door of the Chancery ^ which is one of 
the fineft Buildings in all Sfain. Over this Door the 
King's Arms was fupported by Jufiice and Fortitude^ 
which caufed our Country-man to make feveral Re-* 
fledions. Another Gountiy-fellovv of the factw Pa- 
rifli, who knew what tWfe came abdut, feeina him fo 
attentive, ask'd wh^t he ftar d at fo eameftly, an^ 
why he did not go in to folicit his Bufmefe? The 
firft Country-man anfwer'd, I find' I have nothing to 
do hcre^ How, faid the other, did not you dome ta 
folicit our Caufe ? Yes^ replied this, I did; but fince 
Juftiee is placed fo high, and. has ojti oiie fide die 
Kin^VArmsy arid on tw.pther. Force, .what ean *uif 

20 The Life and ABions Part L 

poor Parifh expeft ! It were better for me to return 
honie^ than ftay waiting here, for I find our Caufe 
is loft. 

My Father's Correlpondent attacked him farther 
as to what related to his Perfon, affirming, he took 
more Care to fet himfelf out than a tawdry Woman 
could. 'Tis true, being a handfome Man, as I have 
already infinuated, and no hater of the Fair Sex, he 
negleded nothing that might render himfelf accepta- 
ble to them, which is not only natural, but allowable 
for any one to do, that has a mind to make himfelf 
belov'd. I muft own he friz'd his Hair, perfumed 
himfelf from Head to Foot, and took more than or- 
dinary Care of his Teeth and fine Hands, for which 
laft hd had a Particular and moft Excellent kind of 
Paftc. I likewife confefs he took a great deal of 
Psdns about his Mtfiacbo\ which were duly turn*d 
up every Night with Wax, and inftruments made on 
purpofe. Tis alfo .true, that a-Nights, before he 
went to Bed, he provided two Curls for his Temples^ 
which the Women now-a-days call Favowites ; and 
that he was every Morning at nis Glafs, tricking him- 
felf up with the like Fooleries. Moft of this I was 
an E^e-witnefs of whilft he liv d, and could not but 
think him highly to blame for minding fiich Trifles 
at hvs Age. But what 6f all this j was he to be re- 
puted ever the lefs honeft for thefe Things ! He lov'd 
Women, and herein he imitated riheir Follies. This 
is all can be faid upon this Head. But as for Painting, 
and the like, as this Villain of a Correlpondent gave 
out he did, I pofitively affirm it to be falfe, or at leaft 
affureyou, I never faw any fiich Thing,and I was ahnoft 
alt^^ay s with him. My Father had no occafi^n for 
any thing of that kind, having as good a Complexion 
as any Body. He was fair, and ofthat fort endimng 
to reddifti^ which People never want a good Ski^ j j 
arid a!s iat his Carnations, they held very good to the 
kft. If lie ufed Red in any part^ it was his Lips, 
;. " whick 

Bodk I. 0f Gtizimn d* Alfarache. 2 1 

which wctt not fo well coloured as could be deiiref'. 
My Father had moreover this Ridiculous in him, for 
I would have you to believe I would not fpare him 
where he was blameworthy^ in that he wafti'd his 
Neck and Breaft every Ni^t and Morning with 
Milk and bitter Almonds foaV d in it, and fometimes 
with Bean-flower Water. But this is a Thing fp com- 
mon among BeMXy that one may fee Examples of 
it every Day iti the Week. 

For my part, who, thanks to my Stars, have not 
fern SL little of the World, I have known not only 
young Men that have Plaifter d. Painted, and wore 
Patches, but alfo old Leaehers, who made ufe of 
thofe fort pf Arts to make themfelves yet more de- 
form'd i and who, when once their Cruft was off, 
were hardly to be known : But thefe People were 
look'd upon as Mcrry-Andrpi/s ; and tho' they happen'd 
by thefe Means to enfnare the Hearts of Women, 
they were fure tobelaugh'd at by the Men, efpccially 
thofe of Sence. After ^is, we cannot blame Women 
fb much for thefe fort of Follies, fmce Men that are, 
or ot^ht to be, wifer, pradife the fame thing. Not- 
withitgnding, it is certain^ that Natural Deformity 
pleaiibs even beyond this artificial Beauty. Nothing 
charms more than Nature^ and one lofes half the 
Pleafure of a Thing as (bon as it difcovers it felf to 
be Artificial. What makes me always laugh Is, that 
thofe Women who paint moft, ftill think to deceive the 
cleareft-fighted Men, and imagine they know now 
thing of the Matter. 'Tis true, they may impofe 
upon Sots and Dotards, who are blinded by the Pa(^ 
fion they haYe for them ; but fuch as have the Ufe of 
their Eyes, and :the Freedom of their Hearts, will 
never lopk upiJn liiem but with Contempt. Women 
likewife are not fo much to be reproach'd with the 
ufe of their Toikt^ fmce I have known a great many 
Men guilty of the fame Folly ; I mean, not only fuch 
a§ were young and bandfome, but even old decrepit 

C 5 Fellows, 

22 The Life and ABim; Part L 

• Felloxvsj who, one would think, fliould have other 
Bufinefi to mind. Some, however^ among the(e fufly 
old Wretches, tho' thus Artfully difguizd, (hall be- 
lieve themfelves as beautiful as Angels. • I was never 
more furpriz'd, than the other Day upon entring the 
Chamber of one of thefe Narcifm's. It Was about 
Ten a Clock in the Morning • I went to folicit him 
about a certain Bufinels, and as I was particularly ac- 
quainted with him, I enter'd freely without knocking. 
i thought /to have found him in his Clofet readings 
or wricirtg, or about feme important Affair, and was 
not a little difappointed to fee him at his Toilet. 'Tis 
true^ I had been told more than once that he valued 
himielf on his Beauty, and thought no Man could be 
more proper to charm a Lady : but that I look'd 
upon as Railery, altho' -he hadfuch Geftureswith 
him when he was in Women's Company, as were 
enough to make" any Body laugh. He would then 

Eut on the Lan^ifting Air, roul his Ferret-Eyes a- 
out, draw up his Mrfuth to half its Bignefe, bite his 
Lips, and endeavour to foften his^harfli ydicc^:;^Now 
iuage, by the remaining part of hisPiiftlire^ if He was 
not a fine Fellow to' chaf-m a Lady': His Face was 
neither little nor great, but both together, the upper 
part being wholly difportion'd to the lower, and 
which, for length, might outmeafure a Foot. His 
Complexion was neither fair nor'brown, but reddifh^ 
and all over ftudded with blewifli Pimples. His Eyes 
were not much larger than a Ferret's, and, like them^ 
red and fiery, promifing a great deal of Luft, and 
very little Honefty. His Nofe was fmall, and a little 
tarn'd up at the tip, with two large Noftrils, that 
gap'd fo wide, you might fee the bottoms of them, 
and fmell what would not very well pleafe you. His 
Mouth, to fpeak prpperly, was like nothing fo much 
^s a Hen's A—, and not lefs wrinkled. What re- 
piain'd of his Teeth, for moft of them had been 
pough'd out, wer9 between black arijl yellow, and 

Boot I. (f Guzman d* Alfarachc. 2 5 

altogether left without Gums by the Scurvy. The 
bell' Thing about him was his Chin, whicn being 
h'ttle, and cock'd up, had Ibmething of Beauty in it. 
As for his- Shape, it was wlioliy Dutcb^ as were like- 
wife his Limbs, which ^were ftrqng^ and robuft. , His 
tegs were' like two large Polls, alLof ji bignels, and 
his tctt altogether as Monftrous., His Hands were 
to tht full as broad as they' were long, and his Arms 
of equal Proportion. Now judge you, if this M^as 
xiQt B. rare ' Fellow to have fuch an Opinion of him- 
lelf J If he had any thingto recommend turn to the 
Ladies, 'twas his brawny Back, which indeed pro- 
mifed much, and, perhaps, might lake with them. It 
wasone Morning, then about Ten a Clock, that I. went 
to pay a Vifit to this beautifiil Adonis. I furpriz'd him at 
his Toilet lb fardled up, that I knew not whether it was a 
Man or aWoman,and was about to have retired,as think- 
ing my felf miftakcn in the Chamber. He was like- 
w& aflonilhed on his part, and the more ioy becaufe 
I had found him in that Condition. Quitting his 
Curling;-Pincers he had in his Hand, and throwing 
off his Combing-Cloth, which, by the by, was as fat 
and durty with Oil arid Powder as a Cook's Apron 
with Grea(e^ he ran to, embrace me, and carry me 
into his Anti-Chamber, that I might not fee what 
was upon his Toiku There indeed was a compleat 
Apothecary's Shop, abounding with Paftes, Poma- 
tums^ Effences, Paint; t)enturices. Perfumes, &ci, 
treafur'd" up in Gallypots, Glaffes, and the like. Ha- 
ving thus fiirveycd his whole Treahiry , tho' he thought 
I had not^ I had a Word or two with him in the next 
lioom about my Bufmefs, and to l^ft him. 


$4 T^^ I-ffi "^^ ASiiotts Fart L 



Guzman goes on ncith an Account of hk Parents^ 
and tells vpho his Mather was ; defiribingy for our 
better InfiruSion^ the evil Condition and bad 
Qualities of a lewd Woman 5 of Bawds ^ of a 
Sen/ual and LafiivioHs Man ^ and concludes ^ that 
difljonefi Love is the Ruin of a Mans Honour^ 
JSJlate and Life* 

rjJL LL thefe Stories and Inventions, aswellfalfe 
jfjL as true, \yhich this curfed Correfpondent of 
my Father's, who was by the by a good Tongue-Pad^ 
had publifli'd of him throughout Sevily had like to 
have had Credit with thfc Inhabitants of that City where 
he was not fufficiently known, had not he fb well 
behav'd himfelf by his modeft atid juft pealinjg, a$ 
to gain both the Efteem and FriendiQiip of the beft 
Merchants there. He had brought a good Purle of 
Money with him from Algiers^ which, with what he 
could fell his Jewels for, might amount to at leaffe 
aoooo Francs. He recover d no lefs of his Correfpon- 
dent I all which was never thelels but little with him, 
who had all along been a great Trader. No 
feody made greater noife than he upon the Exchange^ 
and whilft he play'd the honeft Man, and kept to his 
Bufinefs, no Body fucceeded better. He had a Houfe 
in Town, and another in the Country, both which 
were nobly Furnifli'd, and the latter at St. Juan SAU 
farache^ from whence I took my Name, was in great 
meafure the Caufe of his Ruin. As he naturally 
loy'd Pleafure, he v^ould be there almoft continually, 
pnd triift his Affairs in Town to Factors and Servants, 
who wpifld not fail to make what ufe they could or 

Book I of Guzman d'AI6urach& 25 

dieir Opportunities. Finding this would not dOj he 
had recourfe to Play, which, with many other irre- 
^ar and expenflve Ways, fbon brought him low, and 
in the end empties the fulleft Purfes. He was in this 
Condition, when being one Day at the Excbangi in 
Seofi/ near the great Cnurch, where the Merchant^ 
walking in a kind of Gallery, eafily fee all that 
pafles m the Street, he of a fudden diicover'd t 
Chriftning coming that way, which feem'd to bCi- 
long to (ome Perlons of Diftindion. Immediately 
every Body was for feeing what they could, efpecial^ 
ly when they heardit whifoer d about, that the ChilcJ 
belonged to ibme Perfon or Quality who did not care 
to own it. My Father, being as curious as any Body, 
preis'd forwara to get into the Church, and planted 
himfelf near the Font^ not fo much out of a Deiire 
JO fee this Ceremony, as the Face of a certain Lady 
whom A Knight of the Order of Alcantara l^d^ and 
whom he judg'd to be probably the GofSps to this 
Child. The Lady had a good Air, was well Shap'd, 
walk'd briskly j and my Father concluded, if her 
Face was but anfwerable, (he muft be a lovely Wo- 
man. He was not difappointed, for upon her un* 
veiling her felf, as flie did foon after, he was charm'd 
to Admiration, for flie had not her Equal for Beauty 
at that time in all St'vil This Lady was afterwards 
my Modicr, whom this good Knight had maintain'4 
fpr fome time out of the Profits of two lufty Bene^ 
fices he enjoy'd. My Father gaz'd, like a Statue, on 
this incomparable Charmer, and flood as if he ha4 
been Thunder-ftruck during the whole Cerenjony^ 
My Mother was one of thole Women who eafily re? 
ceive Impreffion at firft Sight, from one fo well made 
as my Father : and theretere flie no fooner faw hin| 
look fo earneitly at her, but Ihe let him underftand^, 
hi^ Addreffes would not be indifferent to her. Thi^ 
pve him great Satisfadion; to augment which, (he 
let 9iy a ^endfrj-ook or two, which, in a Word, quite 

' undid 

2^ The'Life and ASlions Part L 

tindid'him. The Chriftning ended^ the Knight and 
Lady Teturn'd from whence they came^ but my Fa- 
ther could hardly move from the Place where he 
ttood i however^ at length he recover'd^ and did not 
forget to follow* hU Miftrcfs;, that he might know 
who flie was, and where fhe liv*d. Upon Enquiry, 
he found Ihe was kept by this old Knight, whom me 
had livM with a good while. He could not imagine 
ike could have any kindnefs for fiich an ungainly old 
Hunks, and therefore concluded his Addreffes muft 
needs be welcome to her. With this Thought, he con- 
triv'd all the Ways he could to fee and (peak to her, but to 
little purpofe ; all the Favour he obtain d of Fortune was, 
to fee her once or twice at Church, but which was al- 
ways with her old Gallant, who could not live a 
Minute without her. Neverthelefs, as Water at length 
pierces Marble, my Father, by trying many Ways to 
carry on his Amour, at laft met with a Duenna- pro- 
per for his purpofe, who being outwardly Religious, 
had eafy Admittance into the Knight's Houfe with- 
out being in the leaft mi^ruftcd. This old Woman, 
who did nothing but Pray from Morning till Night, 
was withal very Charitable, and having received fe- 
veral confiderable Prefents from my Father, with a 
Promife of many more, thought (he muft not be uii- 
gratefuj, but make what Return (he could by do- 
ing him what Service (he was able. Accordingly 
(he efpous'd his Intereft, (poke to the Lady about 
him, and altho' (he did not liicceed immediately^ did 
not doubt but (he (hould with the Affiftance of more 
Money. That was not wanting, for my Father find-? 
ing her Natural Bent, ftill took care to foreftall her 
Inclinations, being Generous even to Prodigality, 
efpecially where his Love was concern'd. The Duen- 
na did her Duty, and (he was well paid for her Pains. 
' Billet-doux went and came, ai^d Jewels and other Fe- 
male Gallantries were prefented as often as there was 
occafion, No Body has a Heart of Iron, and if Gra- 

. • '. titude 

Book! 0/ Guzman d'Alfirachc. 27 

titude wefe expell'd out of the World, God knows 
what we fliould come to. You muft not wonder 
then if my Mother, who was not bom with the DiC- 
po/ition of a Tigrefi, yeilded fo far to my Father's 
Perfeyei'aftce- and -generous Temper, as to take fome 
notice of himi, * The old' Woman, who was a true 
Subftitute of Satan^ was not wanting to blow the 
Coalsj by every Day fuggefting to my Mother, what 
fine Qualities my Father was Mafter of. My Mbther 
was as fenfible as flie of what (he luggefted^ but be- 
ing a Woman of Wit, had more regarato her Intiereft 
than any thing elfe: She knew flie could have Lovers 
enough upon uncertain Terras, but Ihe was willing 
to be fatisfi'd of the Condition of her ne w Qallant, 
before flie venturd upon him, and before (he quitted 
her old Knight, who was fo kind to her, and doted 
fo much upon her. Love^ however, is generally pre- 
valent, and whenever the Parties are agreed. Moun- 
tains Ihall divide to give them way, and Darknefi 
prefentit felf at Noon-Day to conceal them.- The 
old Knight had no other Charms but his Ducats; he 
Cough'd, he SpawFd, was * incommoded with the 
Gravel, and oftentimes with the Gout : He poffefs'd 
my Mother weakly, whereas my Father attacked her 
vigoroufly; -How then could a Town fo ill defended, 
and fo couragioiiflyftorm'd; be expeded to hold out? 
She yielded at laft, but that upon honourable Terms, 
which flie had learned to make of my Grandmother, 
who was alfo a Woman of Experience. My Father 
granted all Demands, provided he might but enter 
die Place, and the Articles were performed on both 
fides with great punctuality. The only Difficulty 
now, was to get an Opportunity and Place of Inter- 
view ; for, as I told you before more than once, the 
old Knight was fo infeparable from his Miftreis, that 
nothing almoft could be tranfaded without his Pri- 
vity. ' However, my Father and Mother contriv'd the 
Mattcbthus ; ^x^ proposed to th& old Gentleman to 
i go 

a« TheUf^^nd Miohs Parti. 

go and take the Air with her at Gehof^ a Village 
hard by St. Juan^ J'Alfaracbe, where they had former* 
iy been together at a certain Houfe. It wiw now 
Summer-time, and he could by no means r efofe h^ 
fair Miftrefs what ihe defired, neither indexed, had he 
any Inclination. Of all Parts of Spam^ Ani0lmfi0 is 
the moftPleafant, and in all that Provjince, no Retirer 
mem is fo charming as this they had chofen. The 
famous River Guaiahiuivir waters and renders it 
fertiL winding about in fuch various Meanders^ as 
ieem d as if it had not a mind to leave it* The whole 
Neighbourhood abounded with Pleafure-Houfes, En- 
chanting Gardens, Grotts, Fountains, Cafcades, and 
all kinds of the moft delicious Fruits and Flowers. 
In a Word, both the Sight, Tall and Smell, were 
here to be ravifti' Admiration. The Time being 
agreed on, the Day quickly came, and Proviiions 
were fent before, that they might be able to return 
after Supper, according to Cuftoip. The neceflary 
Servants were alfo fent with the Provifions; and next 
Morning betimes,the Knight and myMother letting out 
withth^Duepna, who was always of their Company, it 
was not long before they came in fight of my Father's 
Houfe, by which they muft of neceflity pals. Here 
my Mother began to fall into a Fit of the Cbolkky tel- 
ling thofe about her. That if they did not ftop im- 
mediately, Ihe mull inevitably drop from her Horfe, 
and die. This greatly furpriz d the old Knight, info- 
much, that he knew neither what to fay nor do ; 
which the Duenna perceiving, and it being now her 
Cue to fpeak, flie reprefented to my Mother that 
was to be, that it was neither feemly nor befitting 
one in her Condition to continue in the Highway 
where (b many People were going and coming ince^- 
fantly^ and tnerefore, fince there was a Houle in 
fight which feem'd to belong to fome Perfon of Di* 
ftin<9:ion, (he had better caufe her felf to be carried 
thither, irj hopes to find Relief by Reft, and fome 


Book J. of Guzman d'AI£iiackc.^ i^ 

Coi^dials Ihe might get there. This Advice mlchtily 
pleafed the old Knight, and the cunning Gipiy my 
Mother (for fuch I will call her, tho' fhe was not Vet 
fo) luiving confented that they fhould do with ner 
what they pleas'd, provided they carried her/ for 
walk Ihe could not fo far with thofe Paini Ihe fek, 
the vi7Q Footmen that were with them did that Office 
for her, whilft the poor afBided Knight walk'd be- 
fore to harangue the People that fhould come to the 
Door. As I have already told you, this Houfc was 
my Father's j and he had fo prepar'd the old Houfe- 
keeper he had there, that me no fooner heard a 
knockii^ at the Door, but ihe ran in great hade, and 
feem'd tarpriz'd to find Strangers there. Good Godl 
laid (he, I had like to have wt>ke my Neck for hafte, 
verily believing it was my Matter that knocked fo 
fiirioufly. We muft beg your pardon, replied the old 
Knight, fmce N^effity, and the Condition you fee 
this Lady hi, has obliged us to it. What aik the 
Lady, quoth the Houfe-keeper, and what Service, 
can I do either you or her ? We only defire, anlwer d 
the Knight, you would be fb kind ks to let her rfcft 
a-whiie on a Bed, and give her (bme Cordial or o- 
ther to relieve her from the Cholick, whichfheis ex- 
ceedingly tormented with* If that be all, repKed 
the Houfe-keeper, you could not have pitched upon 
a more charitable Houfe, for our Mafter has given 
us diarge to relieve all honeft Paffengers, and much 
niore jRiCh Peribns ias you fecan to be. Ccwhe in, 
come in a-<3od's Name Sir, proceeded fhe, both yoa 
and your Lady^ and I'll do what I can to ferve hen 
I am only fdrry my Mafter is not at home, for he 
would be fare to treat you after another-guels man- 
ner than I can pretend to, and, perhaps, more fuita- 
ble to your Quality ; but what is in my Power, you 
may depend on. She then conducted my Mother 
into a fiiie Chamber with a noble Bed in it, which 
was bui:^:half finifli'4, to take away Sufpicion. All 


^^<r . The Life and: AStioris' . Partt 

things being in/a feadinefs, as ^jerfum'd. Sheets, foft 
Pillows, and ia Satin pink'd Quilty the Sick Lady 
was put to Bed, who ftill comptaining of great Pains, 
hot Trencheifs were brought her by the Duenna^ 
to apply" to her Belly; but beiag afraid they would 
give hei* ^e Vapours, me Aid them down, to the bot- 
tom of the Bed without perceiving. Having drank 
a good Draught of muU'd Wiae^ fihe defu-'d the 
Company would leave her to her Repofe, which, flie 
faid, ftie doubtjed not would procure her Eafe, The 
poor Knight always, ready, to. oblige her, but more 
particularly at this tifne, when he judg'd Reft would 
do her good, was the firft that left the Room. He 
took Care, ho^ceyer, to leave the Duema with 
her to help herto any: thing fhe wanted, and fy 
having defir'd no Noife might be made to difturb her^ 
he lock'd the Door, and went into the Garden to take 
a Turn whilft Ihe flcpt. My Fajjier, as you may 
imagine, was not far off, lying hid in an adjoining 
Room,, where he heard aU that pais'd j (o that the 
Company was no fooner gone, and the Guards fet, 
( the Duenna^ and the old Houfe-keeper ) but he ven^ 
tur'd forth, and came into my Mother's Chamber^ 
with whom he had fuch a tender and lively Conver- 
fation, that, as I afterwards heard, I owe my Being 
to that very Minute. 

The Sun, which now began to make himfelf felt in 
(pite of all the Frauheur of the Shades and Fountains^ 
at length drove the Knight from the Garden, who 
not knowing whither to go, and being imeafy rill he 
knew how my Mother did, came with a flow and 
grave Pace towards her Chamber, which gave time 
to the Guards to advertife my Father, who retir'd, 
and lock'd himfelf up as before. The old Knight 
enter'd, and coming ioftly to the Bed-fide, ask'd his 
l2>ear Lady^ in a low and. whining Tofte, how flie 
did. She ieeming to bje awak'd, complain'd he had 
idifturb'd her, ana faid fiie woiiider'd he couU not 


Book I (f Guzman d'Al&rache. -^i^ 

fufFer her to fleep one quarter of an Hour, Good> 
God i cry'd the Knight, a quarter of an Hour. Tnv 
confident, my Dear Angel, thou haft flept thefe two-" 
Hours and more. That's likely, replied my Mother! 
but however it be, Tm fure I never had more need of 
Reft than now. . It may be flie did not lie much, 
tho' flie Q)oke altogether with that Inttvit. She, how- 
ever, own'd, Ihe h^d found great Relief by what had; 
been given her, and was in manner quite recovered ;' 
which the old Knight being exceedingly glad to 
hear, and perceiving the Day to be far advanced, he 
advis'd her to pafs the remainder of it tl^ere. She 
confented, providing the People of the Houfe would 
but give her leaye ; and fo the old CavaUer was em- 
ployed to fpeak to the Houfe-keeper about it. She 
told Mm, her Mafter, who was very much a Gentle- 
man, and a Man of Honour, would be very proud 
of that Favour, and confequently advis'd him to fend 
for his Servants fr<5m the other Houfe that was not 
far off^ which he immediately did. 

WhUft thefe Orders were giving, my Father found 
Means to get out of the Houfe by a private way, and 
return d to Sevily that he might appear upon the Ex- 
change^ and come back at Night after his umal Cuftom. 
He thought every Minute an Hour till he was againf 
in his Miftrels's Arms ; nor could he eafily forget the 
time he had fo agreeably Ipent in her Company. He 
came back, between Five and Six a Clock, with a 
very gay Countenance; and the old Knight no fooner 
fpied bim^ but he went forth to pay him his Compli- 
ments, and beg Pardon for the Liberty he and his 
Company had taken. My Father, who knew the 
beft of any Body how to make ufe of Words that 
coft nothing, fo charm'd the old Cavalier with his 
Civilities, that there was ever after a ftrift and invio- 
lable Friendihip between them, infomuch diat he 
himfelf introduc d him to falute his Lady, who was 
then walking ia the Garden becaufe it began to be 


^3 . The Life md AMions Vitt t 

cool. The twoLorers look'd with that indiff^ence on 
each other^ as if diey had never been acquainted, and as 
it was not yet altogether a proper time to walk, 
it was proposed to Play at Ptimcra a-whUe in an 
Arbour, where it was exceeding cool. The La- 
dy won, and my Father loft, or ratther fuf- 
fer d himfelf to lofe by an Agreement between 
them. After this, the Company took a Turn or two 
in fome of the Walks, and,, upon their fitting downy 
they were invited to a Collation which my Father 
had prepared for them in the middle of the Garden. 
The Supper erided, and the Time for returning to 5^- 
**;/ come, they went into a neat Barge of my Fa- 
ther's, which he had caufed to be Stt off with green 
Boughs and Flowers to flicker the Company from the 
Inclemencies of the Air, and to aflFord them agree- 
able Objedrs. This Barge ^as furrounded by a great 
many lefferOnes, in fome of which were Conforts of 
Miifick, and Peribns that Sung and Play'd on divers 
Inftruments. Thus the Company could not be more 
Agreeably entertained j ivhich had that EfFeA on the 
poor old Knight^ that he never thought he could 
make Acknowledgments enough to my Father for it, 
and from whom he could not be parted, without ha- 
Vii^ firft a Promife of feeing him again fpeedily. 

This Friendfliip was lb well concerted, and fo pru- 
dendyman^'d, both by my future Father and Mother, 
that it laftedduring the Life of the old Knight, who, 
in truth, iiv'd not much longer. He had been a great 
DAauchke^ and- given himfelf up entirely to all ibrt» 
of Pleafurefi,. without any Fear of the other World, 
or Regard t?6 this. It may be he knew there was a' 
God_, but he Iiv'd as if there had been none; dto^e- 
Aer abandbmng his Soul, and necleiSting the Duties 
of a Oiriftian. The End of ^ Man difcovers what 
ht is, and it was his deplorable Fate to die as he h^ 
livy J for. iii Three Days time he found himfelf &x 
«tr€pwhc!lftv*d mth Difeafes, tbac h^ had no leifure to- 
.L..' fhii»k- 

iBookL of Guzman d^AIfarachc. ^g 

think of any thing elfe^ and io expir'd with all his 
Sins about him. A ftrange Fatality this attending 
Mankind! who, tho* they fear D^ath above all Things, 
are fo negligent in preparing for their latter Endsi 
and tho' they every Day (ge Examples of the fiiort- 
nefs of . human Lite, live as if they believ'd them- 
ifelves Immortal. 

^ I was jfome few Years old wheii this pdor Knight . 
died, but was not his only Heir, for he had othei' 
Children by other Miftreffes that had the fame Pre- 
tences with my felf, and were in like manner entfir- 
tfained inhisHoufe. We were ^11 Loaves of the fame 
Wheat, yet, (as the faying is) every one had a "diiFe- 
rent Overi ; but if my Brothers had not coft the old 
Cavalier more than I aid, he would have maintain d 
them cheap enough. I was the only Child my 
Mother had ; but as I .was the youngeft, there was 
reafbn flie fliould take care to Prog for me, arid pro- 
cure me a good (hare in the Inheritance* , In a 
word, fhe provided for me like a Wortian of AnJa^ 
loufiAy for thofc are fam'd for. having Wit, even iii 
their Fingers. Ev^ery orie,iri fhort, made up his Bun-* 
die ; but befjdes that my Mother had done confi-* 
derably during the Life of the good old Man, Ihe 
did not forget to augmerit her Store with what was 
beft, how he was at his laft Gafp ^ for as flip was his 
Favourite-Miftrefs, flie had the Keys of all, and 
might confequently fcr^pe up what ftie would. What 
was deplorable, is, Thkt he loft even the Sheets froni 
his Bed before the Breath was out of his Bodjf^ 
All was fpirited aw^y in a Moment, fo fooA as tho 
Phyficians had given him over, and they faw there 
was no hopes of Life left. When he Wsls dead, the 
Kindred came dboiit him ; but tho* they faW f here 
was nothing for them, they found themfelves liridei^ 
an Obligation to bury him for Honour's lake; whichj 
however, they did at as little Eitpence ^s they dould/ 
iiad without fliedding many Tears, for omy fhey 

D that 


34 ^ t^f and ABiotts Part L 

that have fbmewhat left them are oblig'd to that Duty. 
The Mourners muft be paid, to be fure, and Heirs 
only have the Priviledge of dry Eyes, becaufe their 
Hearts are fuppos*d to be full of Joy. I could here 
tell you a pleaiant Story that offers much to the pur- 
pofe i but I dare not, becaufe it relates to a certain- 
Gentleman, with whom I am acquainted, and for 
whom I have fome Deference. The Kindred of the 
deceased, who expe<fted great Jffits from a Perlbn 
who had above 2000 Ducats a Year in Church-Reve- 
nues, befides what he had of his own Patrimony,, 
which was alfo confiderable, and who knew his' 
Houfe to be nobly furnifh'd, and that all manner of 
Plate was to be found there that fuited with one of 
his Quality, began to be furpriz'd when they faw 
only that left which could not be carried away, wz^ 
the Lands and Tenements, which, however, were 
deeply engag'd for great Sums. All this made thent 
enter Caveats, dnd put out Advertifements for DiC- 
covery of conceal'd Matters, promifing great Re- 
wards J but which was to little purpofe, for Thieves 
will be faithful to one another even where honeft 
Men will not. My Mother, 'tis true, had the beft 
Excufe for what fhe had got of any of them ; for 
when my fuppos'd Father would come home in 
good Humour with fome Moveables he had bought, 
be would commonly fay to her, Tlis^ my Dear^ is aS 
, thine ; This is all for thee : And Heaven reft his Soul, 
to fay Truth, he was a very kind Man. . Now was 
not this a Gift in Form, and ought my Mother to 
have any Scruple upon her Confcience, after fo fair a 
Conveyance ? Befides, fhe might well be faid to 
have earn'd what Ihe had ;. for who would lye by 
fuch a fulfom old Fellow every Night for a common 
Penfion ? . You muft needs acknowledge; a Ggllant of 
his Years was not a very proper Bedfellow for fo 
young and handfom aWoman as my Mother was. More- 
over^ the Divines, to whom fhe put' Cafes of Con- 

' t • ^ t * * 

Book I. of Oukman d'AIfarachc. 95 

fcience upbn this Occafion. acquitted her of any 
Crime^ providing fhe parted with a little Money to 
% Malies for the Deceafedi But what is moft la- 
mentable relating to this Knight, who died the moil! 
miferable of kll Meii, and which deferves our Re- 
flexion the moft, is. That Divine Protridence fuffer'd 
him to haVe much the fame Fate with the Poor he 
had forgotten, dnd whofe Revenues he enjoy'd • for 
either our Reli^on is falfc, or it is true, to fay^- 
That the Goods of the Church are the Patrimony of 
the Poor^ that the Church has thetii confided to her 
fc the Mother of the Poor, and for their Ufe • and 
that fee afterwards diftribtites them in Truft to Lay- 
Perfons> whe arc to render a ftrid Account of thcml 
If this be fo, ^ moft certain it is. How dare Pre- 
lates, Abbots, Priors, Canons, and other Ecclefia- 
iticJcs, apply them altogether to their own private 
t/fe, as they ire but too frequently accuftom'd to 
do ? Nay, we he^r every day, thefe People preach 
Charity to us, while they have little or none of h 
thcmlclti^e^. Do you now-a-days fee any of thefe 
Holy Folks, with their High Collars, ^nd their pro- 
mifing Countenances, vifit Hofpitals, Jails, Alms- 
Houles, and (iich-like Places, as they Ought to do ? 
No truly : And perhaps you'll tell me, they avoid 
thefe,as tney do Stage-PlSys,Gaming-Houfes, Merry- 
Meetings, and other Divertifements, tneerly becaule 
they are not convenient for them^ They^ forlboth^ 
mutt be fuppos'd to be in their Studies reading or 
compofing Ibrne florid Sermons ; and whefi ever they 
receive YiRiSj, it is from the Beaux Efprtisy and when- 
ever they, pay them,it is to thfe fine Lady, ftot oft th^ 
fcore of Love, you muft imagine, but om of purfii 
Friendfliip, whicn is not Criminal before God. There 
their Converfation was up6n Gallantries, Witticifmsy 
Puns, Quibbles, Coriunorums, and the like foolifh 
Levities j but without amufih^ our felves any longer 
about thefe Trifles^ let us enquire what they do <vicb 

3^ / The Life and Anions FartL 

thefe Goods of the Poor confided to them by the 
Church. What they do ! Why^ they build fine 
Houfes in the Country, whither they retire for 
Study and Prayer-fake; for you know, boththele are 
becoming a Divine. Thefe they furniih finely, and 
above au get a magnificent Library, which you* 
know is Eflential to, and, as it were, the Duty of 
their Charader. They muft render themfelves Learned 
before they Preach, and indeed whether they Preach 
or not. They muft divide their Lives between Prayer 
and Study; and they would have you to believe they 
do not Study but • to be able to Pray the better. 
But all this while, what becomes of the Po6r ? Muft 
they Starve for want of what is due to them ? The 
Poor ! Why, I confefs, they ought not to Starve ; but 
then let them live upon Charity. AsTor the Prieft, 
he muft live according to his Quality and Rank, let 
what will become of the Poor, He muft keep a 
good Table, and have a fuitable Equipage^ not be- 
ing obliged to Faft and do Penance, as the poor Beg- 
ging-Friars are. To live thus, is for the Honour of 
the Church, which he cannot do at lefs Expence ; 
and every one will allow, he that ferves the Altar 
ought to live by the Altar ; and that he that has one 
or more Benefices, (for fome you know have more 
than one) ought to have reafonable Recompences for 
his daily Duty. All this I grant : But why (hould^ 
what belongs to the. Poor be employ'd in building 
Houfes, buying Furniture, ereding Libraries, provi- 
ding, good Tables, paying unneceSary Servants^ and" 
the like Expences, which you fay are, as it were^ 
Eflential to a Benefic'd Perfbn ? You make me 
laugh to hear you talk thus. Are Clergymen only 
oblig'd to take Care of the Poor, and do Alms ? 
No, I don'f: fay fo ; but I aflirm they are more o-* 
blig'd to thofe Duties than other Men ; and that what: 
in others is term'd Charity and Almfgiving, in then^ 
, ought to be call'd Duty and Reftitution, You fcai 


Book L of Guzman d^AIraf achcJ 3 7 

the Matter too narrowly^ Sir i and, according to 
your Rules, I don't know what Clergyman could be 
lav'd. Fm afraid moft of us would not, becaufe our 
Profeffion requires abundantty more Circumlpcdion 
than thofe.of other Men, and yet, for the moft part, 
we are loofer in our Condud than any : However, it 
muft be allow'd, a great many of us acquit our felves 
pioufly of our Duty, tho' pernaps the greater number 
does not. 

But hold, Guzntan! What have you to do to meddle 
with the Churph ? Know you not, that they are People 
the leaft apt to foreive of any ? Are you another St.Cbarles 
Borromeoyf^otn^imQtid to Preach and give Leffons ? No, 
by no means ; but when the Oven is once heated, a 
opark or two will fly out. I beg your Pardon, good 
Reader, not only for this Fault, but whatever others 
of the like kind. 1 may ht guilty of hereafter. I muft 
confefs, I am apt to fix upon any thing that ftands in 
my way, and mall undoubtedly do the fame for the 
future, whatever AdvicQ you give me to the con- 
trary. But taHe no Notice of me, 'tis fufficient if 
I (peak to the purpofej and if not, you need not re- 
form your lelf by me. You do not enquire, whether 
a crooked Fellow made the Clothes you have on; if 
they fit you, 'tis \yell enough. I acquaint you never- 
thelels with my Humour, that you may Arm your 
felf with Patience. If my Charafters don't pleafe 
youj 1 hope, at le^ft, they won't tire you. I mould 
as much wonder that they pleas'd every Body, as that 
they pleas'd no Body. Every one has his Taft ^ but 
then the mifchief is, every one thinks his own the 
beft J and we have but too many fantaftick People in 
the World. Some Sot, it may be, will tell me, we 
muft not difpute of Tafts, but then there is nothing 
more true than that there is a good and a bad Taft ; 
and how fhould we come to know them afllinder but 
by difputing, tho', indeed, the obfttnacy of Mankind 
is npw grown (6 gr-eat, that few can agree about it. 

D 5 Butr 

^8 The life and ASiim Parti, 

But let's return to (peak of my Mother, who re- 
quires it of me, and who, being Widow to an old 
Gallant, was glad tp find a young onp in my Father* 
Formy part, I was now about four years old, and had 
this in common with her, that having \oSi one Father^ 
t quickly found another, which by die by is no fmall 
Advantage, and a fure Way not to become an Or- 
phan. My Mother, like a cunning Woman, knew 
well how to fob me upon them both, tho*, perhaps^ | 
belong'd entirely to neither, and that fome third Per- 
fon had a Finger in the Pye^ When I was with the 
pld Knight, (he would tell him, I was as like him as 
if i had come oi|t of his Mouth ; and yv^hen I was 
with the other, who upon her V eracity I have aU 
ways taken ror my true Father, ftie would make him 
believe, I refembled him as much as one drop of Wa- 
ter did another, All thefe Matters, however, are UDr- 
certain, for how many People are there in the Wofl4 
who have only reputed Fathers ! How many Princes 
and great Lords, who owe their Beings, next under 
God, to Footmen and Vakt de Chambres 1 What a Hur- 
ricane would it raife in ^milies, if the Childrea 
fliould happen to be like thdir Fathers only. 'Tis ^ 
pretty faying indeed. That if Blood ennobles, it muft 
be that of the Mother, whereas thefe Things are 
wholly cafual. For my part, they fliall never trouble 
my Head, and all that I know of the Matter is, that 
I m certain Fm a Gentleman, becaufe I'm the Soa 
both of a Knight of Alcantara and a Noble Gtmefsi, 
And then for my Mother's fide, flie was Nobilitv: 
it felf, being defcended from a long Train of illuftri- 
pus Anceftors of the very beft Families in Sfain^ in* 
fomuch, that you might make a Tree of their Ge- 
nealogies, ias large as that of the Houfe of Tikd^ 
It is neyerthelefs poffible, my Mother might hs^ve had 
9 third Gallant of not fo good a Family as the other, 
twoj for flie that deceives one Man, may as well de- 
ceive two. Examples are but i;oo frequent of this 

' k' 

Book r. if' Guzman cTAlfarache. 3^ 

kind, e^cially where the Parties are bound only by 
the Ties of Love or Intereft^ and not by that of 
Mdniage* 'Tij weU known, Love has it's Whimiies i 
^nd what is belov'dtoDay, ftall be hated to Morrow; 
and then as for latereft, when a Woman is only tied 
jto a Man by that, he that bids more fliall be fure to 
JiavQ her. But for married Women, that's quite ano- 
ther Thing. A Contrad is a Contraft^ and 'tis not 
lb eafy to fe{!>argte what Heaven has join d. 

It h aot but married Women have their Gallants, 
who arc to them inftead of Second and Third Hus- 
bands; but then the Husbands always remain, and 
the Gallants would have enough to do to drive them 
put of their Beds. The married Women have alfo a 
Priviledge above the unmarried in that, by an extra- 
ordinary Rule in Aritkmtticky they fatisfy two Men 
' for one, of whidi the Gallant makes the Number, 
for the Husband always paffes for a Cypher ; fo that if 
*hey happen t;Q be fo chaft as-to have but one Stallion, 
rhey ferve but one Man, tho' rhey lie with two. For 
my parr, I always went for the Son of the £ei;^»r 
Gentleman, I own'd him for my Father, and there* 
fore, according to Juftice, he pught to difown me 
neither in this nor the World to come. My Mother, 
who ought to know beft whole Son I was, for Intereft* 
lake put me upon my Dead Father. All I know of 
the Bufmefs is, Aat the Noble Genoefe^ who was ei* 
ther my Father, or not my Father, it matters not 
whether, lov'd us both, my Mother and I, fo cordial- 
ly, that at length he married her. He knew very 
weH what Reputation (he had, and that he was like* 
ly to come fpeedily into the Order of Alteon ; never- 
tnelei^ nothing could dilTwade him, have hei^he muft, 
and ft) he foon had. He was one that was very con- 
ftant to what he lov'd, but, believe me, in other re- 
fpe^ he knew what he did. My Father's AfFairis, 
as I have already told you, began to be a little un- 
tMfif^^d when he firft came to know my Mother; but 

P 4 ^^ 

4p The Life anJ AHions Tart I 

(he made him plentiful Amends for the Expence he 
had been at in courting her, by putting into his 
Hands not only what the old Knight had left her^ 
but alfo what (he had purloin'd from feveral others, 
with whom fhe had liv'd as a Miftrefs. Her ordinary 
Maxim was^ to refufc nothing that was offered her j 
and (he had this particular good Houfwifry, to live as 
much as (he could at other Peoples Charges, info- 
much that; with nine or ten thoufand Ducats ftie had 
fcrap'd up, (he foon (et up my Father again, and (av'd 
him from a (econd Breaking he was juft about to 
make. In (hort, he thought him(elf exceeding happy 
f o get her, and I hope you have nothing to fay a- 
gainft it, for thefe are Matters that happen every 
JDay. If only untouch'd Virgins were to marry, I 
dare promife the World would (bon be at an end, or 
at leaft it would not be fupported l^ Maniage. Your 
tried Women contribute moft to Generation, where- 
as Maids are (b fqueami(h, 'tis a long while before 
ou can bring them to't^ and fo much time there is 
oft, that migh t,methinks,have been better (pent. Well, 
but when you get a Maid, (he has always (bme Love 
Intrigue or other running in her Head, which if (he 
can accomplifh, then Good-night to all Marriage 
Joys. That's the very Rea(bn, lay you, I would not 
have her. But pray, Mr. Squeamijlj, (reply I) I have 
known as nice as your Wor(hip that have married 
fuch Ladie§ without fcruple, altho' they knew 
they had thefe Failings. Would you have me (hew 
you one of thefe ? I can do it if I pleafe, and one 
that at firft Sight, you would take for a Man that 
muft have a Woman cut out on purpo(e for him, and 
who would not look upon one that was not of the 
ftrideft Virtue. 'Tis he you fee there, and whom 
you know as well as I. You are not ignorant what 
a miferable Hand that mercile(s Cenfurer of good 
natur'd Husbands, and tender Wives, has made of it ; 
and that, afccf all his Caution, he has pitch'd upon 


Book L of Cttzm^n d^AIfarache. 41 

one for a Wife^ that miakes no fcruple of going at 
Noon-day to beat up her Lover s Quarters. This is 
no Secret^ for every Body knows they have been a^ 
bove three Hours together without any bodies inter- 
ruptinig them. In three Hours, you Know, there may 
be a great deaf done, efpecially between Perfons (o 
well inclind, yet the doting Coxcomb will have it, 
(he came thither only to ftring a Necklace j and that 
tho' Ae and her Paramour were both feeij fiting or 
lying on the Bed together, (I Sin t tell which) SierQ 
was nothing pafs'd between them. For my part, 
I believe the lame, nothing but what Ihould, for f 
would not wrong my Neighbour, by judging ill of 
him, for the whole World. In a Word, this mdivic|ual 
Marriage-hater married this Lady, whom he thought 
never the worfc for fuch a Slip. I will not pretend 
to tell you, whether 'twas Love or Intereft made him 
do this fine Feat j but this I can affure you. he's none 
of the bell Natur'd, nor none of the molt Amorous 
Men in the World j Love being what does hot at all 
agree with his Age, for he'9 much tum'd of Forty: 
Likewile one may compute, that fuch a humourlbm, 
brutiflij Iplenetick ; and filent Fellow, is always old. 
tho' he be but fiv6 and twenty. He was naturally alt 
this, and he's yet become more fo fince his fine Mar- 
riage. Capricorn is never without thele * Ibrt of In^ 
fluences, and 'tis faid he had that Sign for his Aicen- 
dant. What is laid, is faid^ arid a Man can't go 
contrary to his Star. . It muft be own'd, how- 
ever, that a Self-flifficient Fool can't be bet- 
ter punifti'd than this Coxcomb was. This is only, 
part of a Story which I tell you by the bv, and one 
Day or other, perhaps, I may tgll you the reft, for 
my Memoirs are already provided, and I have e- 
nough to make you laugh till your Sides crack. But 
let us return once more to Ipeak of my Mother, 
whom my Father tpok with all her Faults, and 
laugh'd at thofe that went about to undeceive him. 


£vexy one knows beft whiere the $hooe wrings^ a^d 
^cis the greateft Impertinence for any Body to pieteod 
to ihew one. If my Fathei^s Shooe had wrong htm^ 
he would ioon have found it out. The World would 
certainly go better^ if every one minded what only 
^lonfifd to him« I am now to tell y ou^ XM Father 
lb effotftually recover'd himfelf with fny Mother s 
Money^ that he never was in a better Condition. 
^isgreateflMisfortune was^he lov'd fplendor and (how^ 
mA would have a fine Equipage^ coft what it would. 
He led this Couri^ of Life fo long^ that, it being im- 
poffible it ihould lafl^ he at length foijnd himfelf o- 
blig'd to go afide again3 which almoft broke my Mo- 
ther's Heart. He nkewile was fo much conqern'd at 
it himfelf, chat feeing no Hopes to recover his loft 
State^ and live as he had formerly done^ be languifli'd 
JFor a while, and at length died, regretted by no 
^ody^ but thofe that had loll Money by him. 

My Mother was both greatly afflicted and embar-r 
rafs'a at his Death. We had already feen the Houfe 
at St. Juan dMfarscbt go, as ^kewife that in the City, 
to ftop the Mojjths of Creditors. All our ready 
Money went alfo by little and little during his Life- 
time. My Mother, notwithftanding, being as vain- 
glorious as lie, would needs bury him as fumptuoufly 
^s if he had died in the moft profperous Condition. 
This you may imagine drain'd us pretty handfomly, 
and there wanted but little to reduce us to the greateft 
Mifery. We had now only Ibme few Goods left, 
ivhich my Mother intended to fell, and live as. well 
9s file could upon what they produced. For my part, 
younp; as I was, I had a little Ambition in me, and 
jtherein I truly refembled my Father : Such a quiet and 
retir'd Life as my Mother intended to lead, was not 
9t all to my Liking ; I had been us'd to Noife and 
Buftle in my Father's Houfe, and I ^could hear nq 
more of that. I had been likewife bred with a Spirit 
of Liberty, as b^ing the only Son^ and could not 

\ " ROW 

now endure to be gorera'd by a Womani wbo^ I 

could plainly perceive, bad little Government of her 
felf. As I was hot and h^adilrong, I often plagu*d 
|ier to the very Soul^ and would needs be Mafier of 
the Houfe, tho' I were not above i; or 14 Years ohi 
In fhort, we had Quarrels almoft without ceaimg. 
She wiih'd a thoufan^ times ihe had had a Girl in« 
Head of me, who, (he faid, niight have been a Support 
to her old Age, as fhe had been to that of her Mo^ 
ther; who, by the by, was an admirable Woman at 
all Ibrts of Loxx-Intrigues» She had bred up her 
Daughter in the fame Profeflion, wlio, as you have 
already heard, was a Model for Virtue and Honour* 
Never had Child fo many Fathers as fhe. Ther^ 
were enough for her to cnoofe out of j but lefiihe 
ihould make an ill Choice, her Mother chofe one fort 
her. My Grandmpther was one of the fineft Women 
of her time, and had the moft Wit^ and beil Breeding; - 
HerHoufe was not fo much a School of Love, asof Po- 
liteneft and Gallantry. It was only free for thef 
greaceft Quality, elpecially the younger fort, whoxi:^ 
fhe kept under great Difcipline, and who might well 
be faid to be fine Gentlemen^ after they had been 
inftru<9:ed a while by her* She had my Mother by a 
random Stroke, for fhe hardly knew how her felf; 
but fhe neverthelefsdid every one of thefe Gentlemen 
the Honour to lay her at their Doors, and fatisfied . 
pvery one fhe had fome Refemblance with them in ibme 
Particular. She alio never fail'd to call her by the 
Name of the Perfon diat was by ;• and when there 
happened to be two or more, as there ibmetimes was, 
then fhe was call'd in fiiort J>onm Marcella^ whic^ 
was her Chriilian Name, ' but as for the Donna^ that 
to be fure was neyer forgot. My Grandmother all along 
had a kindnefs for the Family of the Gux.mans^2LTA asot^e 
of her Gallants happen'd to be of thac Name, and 
whom fhe lov'd beu of any, fhe thought fhe could 
x^t do better than mak^ her Daughter defcend from. 


44 the Ufe and Mions PattL 

a Houfe fo illuftrious^ tho' jQie confeffed to him at the 
fame time in private, that for ought flie knew, fli? 
might be begot by a certain Lord, who was a near 
R elation to the Puke of Medina Sidonia^ a Grande? 
of Spain. 

' In fhort, my good old Grannum was a very under- 
ftanding Woman, and altho* flie always liv d great^ 
file never wanted for any thing, for as her Beauty be- 
gan to decline, my Mother s began to rife. Now 
you muft know, a lucky occafion happen d much a^ 
bout this time to teach my Mother her Trade, for 
hitherto by great chance flie had continued a Maid. 
It feems a Mferchant w^s newly come from FerUy who 
meafur'd Money by Bufhel-fulls, and who coming to 
my Grandmothers Houfe, bargain d to give her 4000 
good Ducats for her Daughter's Maidenhead. The 
Offer, you may be fure, was accepted ; and after my 
Mother had learned her Trade, Hie went on in it very 
couragioufly. Never Chriftian acquitted her/felf 
better of her Duty, and if Ihe had had the good For- 
tune to have a Daughter in my room, or at leaft to 
have brought me a Sifter into the World, we ftiould 
no doubt have been in better Circumftances than we 
now were, for my Mother underftood her Profeffion 
perfectly well, and had an excellent knack at Com- 
municating it to others. Befides, Sevil was a wonder- 
ful proper Place for this fppt of Praftife, being the 
common Refuge for Perfons of the moft eminent 
Virtue, and who could not fail of getting good Liveli- 
hoods there; but if Sevil had not been mmcient, Ma- 
drid would have plentifully fupplied that Defe<9:. 
' My Misfortune, however, was to have little or nothing 
to do there, wherefore being a fort of Encumbrance 
to my Mother, becaufe I was of the wrong Sex, I 
refolved to go feek my Fortune elfewhete j and it 
came into my Head to go vifit my Kindred at Genoa. 
For this purpofe I thought proper to take the Nanie 
of my Mothet, which was Guzman^ as being morQ 

BookJ« of Guzman d'Alfarache. 45 

honourable than that of my Father, and to add to ft 

J'Alfaracbey which befpoke me a Perfbn of Quality. 

I knew of what Importance it was for fuch Knight- 

Errants as my felf to have Names of Confeguence, 

and was fatistied that the Titles of Count and Marquejs 

afe Gomfnonly taken up by fuch People with left 

Healon than I had taken thele. Without a Title, a 

Man in a ftrange Country is little minded; and with 

one, I have heard of an ordinary Tradefnian s Son, who 

had a little Money, and was tolerably h^dfbme, that 

has got ^ admittance into the moft iptendid Courts, 

and made himlelf equal to thole Lords whom he was 

not worthy to ferve as a Page. Tis true, a Man muft 

matnage thefe Matters with a great- deal of Caution, 

otherwife he may chance to be kick'd and degraded 

to his Primitive Condition, but thofe that hive Se^cc 

know well how to avoid thefe Difafters ; and if the 

worft come to the worft, 'tis but going into another 

Prince's Territories and you get clear of all; and may, 

if you think fit, play the Tame Game over again. 

This, in truth, is not very warrantable, but every one 

has a different Tafte, and, for my p j'-t, I'm for this 

fort of Life. Can any thing be more charming, than 

for a Man who, perhaps, is defcended from the very 

Dregs of the Populace, to ride in his Coach and Six, 

with his Pockets full of Pifioles ? How he comes by 

them is not material, but if he has a good Addrefs, 

andean fpeak well, he fhall enter where another Per- 

fon of much greater Confequence fhall be excluded, 

and at Hours that no Body, perhaps, but himfelf can 

be admitted. When one has a Talent for Things of 

this Nature, I think one ought to make ufe of it. 

What does a Man come into (;he World for, but to 

make a Noife ; right or wrong, I fay. he ought to 

makeaNoife. Perhaps, Reader, thefe Maxims may 

not be to thy Liking, but they are proper for fucn 

Rogues as I am, and therefore thou muft not be 

furprii'd if henceforward I make ufe of them. 


4^ the JJfe dnd A^imis tart t 


i>ii I "^i 


C H A ^. IIL 

Guimah teaves hk Mffther^s Hiujej and^ hy the 
WAjiy difcoHrJfei oh the Torments of Hunger i 
Afterwards he ieffs you what hefil mm with an 
Hojiefij recoHnting manj notahk Infiances of Hi 
Governments , 

/ ■ ♦ • 

NOW wks I in my Thoughts^ the illuftrioiis Don 
Guzman iTAlfarache. I was a Young Lad that had a 
great deal of Wind in my Head^^ but httle Money in 
my Pocket to carry on my Projeds. I was not yet 
well enough acquainted with the World, and I had 
£i mind to learn what it was made of. This was i 
great Undertaking I affure yoli, &nd I think I did 
WcU to begin it betimes. The worft Was, being an 
oxily Son, I had.not only been plentifully, but nicely 
brought up, hid had my full fwingfe of Pleafure, and 
ivas now entrlng upon the Stage of the World, 
Which is a Sea full ot Rocks ind Quick-Sands, clpe- 
Cially to one of my Age^ who was capable of but 
Httle Reflexion. I had often threatned my Mother 
1 would leave Her when Ihe leaft expeAcd ir, and, 
perhaps, flie defir'd no better, tho' flie pretended the 
fcontrary, and endeavour'd to alter my Refolution. 
But at length (he having one Day rattledi me more 
than ordinary on account of fome Money I had 
ftolen from her^ and whereof we had but little in 
the Houfe, I caught up my Cloak briskly, and, going 
out^ told her, if ihe iaw me any more (he muft give 
me better Language^ As the Day was far fpent, my 
jfourney was not over great j I went no farther than 
St. La%army a Chapel but alittle way oiF from the City.: 
Thera fitting me down on the Steps, I began to con- 


Book I. of Guzman d^Alfarache. 4/ 

fider what I had done. 'Tis true, I left my Mother's 
Houfe in a great fury, and walk'd at that rate as if 
Bailies had been at mv Heels, but you fee how foon . 
I was tired; I am hardly got half a League off before 
I begin to repent, andf Night and Melancholy have 
thrown their Sable Cloaks over me. I found my 
feif alone at a Church Door without knowing whither 
to gO; Befides, it was Supper-time, dnd my Belly be- 
gan to tell me fb J yet as Misfortunes never come 
fmgle, it happen'd to be Friday when I could get no. 
Flefli ; but what fignifies either Fifli or Flefh, if I 
were lb far off from an Inn that J could not come at 
them. 'Tis true, I had Drink enough, for Plenty of 
fine clear Water ran within a Foot of me ^ but what 
fignifies Water to a raw Stomach ? Wretched Repaft, 
unfortunate Adventurer ! I might be fad, 'tis certain,- 
l)ut Sadnefs would not fill my felly. I then began to 
find the difference between my Mother's Houfe ana 
a Church Door ^ between a Table covered with good 
Viduals, and not a Morfel to eat ; between a certain- 
ty of having a good Lodging, and not knowing 
where to lay my Head. But, however, what plagu^ 
me moft, was Hunger. There's no Pain, but whajt 
Eating can affwage, nor none, but what is augmented 
by Faning. When one has no Jaw-work, no Pleafure 
is relifh'd, nor Comfort entertained. Then every 
Body is out of humour, and hardly any Body know^ 
wherefore* We Talk and Preach, and lay dowp 
Maxims for each other's CondutSt,, but to little pur- 
pofe. While I was in this Quondary, feeing the 
Church open, I had a mind to go in and refign my 
felf into the Hands of God, beteeching his Divine 
Majefty to direft me what I was to do. I did as I 
was diipos'd, but was fain to make my Prayer fliort^^ 
becaufe the time was come that the Cfiurch Door was 
to be fliut, and I was intreated to walk out. This- 
feem'd an ill Omen, for what could I think when I 
was driven even out of the Church, which is the com- 

4? ^ , The Ufe and ASlions Part t 

moh Afylum for the Unhappy. \ did not know what 
to think on't ; but obey I muft, and fb out I went^ 
*Tis true, I did not go far, for I car d riot to venture 
farther th^n the Place where I was before, the Night 
being ei:ceeding dark. There fitting me down, in 
fpite of my fmall Courage the Tears began to flow 
frorti my Eyes. I did not know whither to go, for- 
ward or backward, dreading Precipices before, and 
Wolves behind, fo gfeat was my Panick Fear. In 
the midft of thefe Difquiets, Slee{) feiz'd mci when 

?utting my Nofe within my Cloak, and leaning my 
lead agamft the Iron Rails, I flept fo heartily, that 
the Suri had been up two Itours before I awak*d. 
This put me in mind of a Story of one Mmtagney 
who accottipanying his Wife's Corps to the Grave, 
and happening to pafs by a Tavern, where he knew 
they Ibid good Wine, he ftop'd, and pretending fbme 
extraordinary occafion to call there, defir'd his Friend* 
and Relations to proceed forward, and he would fol- 
low them. He Went inland being under great Affliction,' 
caird for a Pint of Wine, which having drank, he 
caird for a Second, a Third, and a Fourth, till at 
length, being got very Drunk, he fell afleep upon the 
Table. The Funeral Ceremony ended, the Com- 
pany wonder d he did not corne„ and therefore 
thought proper to go and look for him, fearing he 
might have fwoon'd on the R.oad, thro' Grief. As 
they went along, they enquir d of etery Body, and 
heard nothing of him ^ butatlaft coming to the Place 
where they had left him, they found him afleep on the 
Table. Calling him, he ftarted up, and immediate- 
ly recolle<aing his Error, cried out in a great Agony, 
Alas my Dear Wife ! what an unfortunate Day is this 
to me ! You muft pardon me. Gentlemen, fince yoii 
fee how God has afflided me, for nothing is lb apt to 
make a Man fleep, as Afflidion. So, I believe, it f&r d 
with me J Grief and Melancholy had made me fleep)^, 
but then it was not after a good Drinking-bout as th^' 


Man's wasj for 'tis well known Ihad nothing to drinfc. 
but Water^ and that^s but finall Comfort^ Heaven 
knows. I had now fafted from BiJsj Noon to this 
titne^ and that you may imagine was no finall M^at^ 
ter for one to do^ that conftantly had his fouc 
Meals a Day. Tfais^ nevertheleis^ did not hinder me 
from deeping heartily^ altho*^ in io improper a Place^ 
infbmuch that, as I told you before, I did not wake 
till SatttrJajf Mornings and which, perhaps^ I had not 
done then, if Ibme Country Wenehes, who were 
probably goring to a Wedding, had not difturb'd me' 
with their MuHck. At this Noiie I Itarted i^, and^ 
hardly awake knew not for the prdent where I wasy 
and at laft could fcarce perfwade my (elf I had been; 
afleep out of Sevil at a Church Door. Wtlj^ I was' 
pretw well come to my fdf^ and fpu^ the Cafef 
^)oa, that is^ that I had left my Mother aod was.ia 
queft of better Fortune, I cried, rll on aGodaNjame^' 
fince die Fates haveib allotted feer me; wbicjb layini 

t got upon my Legs, and feeing feveral Waysu an( 
not knowing whicii was beft to take, I chofe thel 
broad^3 and you know whitter that leadsv That 
Centtnonwealtn muft needs be ill govem'd where the 
Pect do tfaMS Office of the Head, and Reaibn. and 
Prudence have nothii|g to do« My Feet then were 
nsy' Guides^ -and I followed them whitherfoevef they 
led me. I were Uke that Mountebank of £/iJtfii9i^iii',wh^ 
having never ftudied, and not knowing how either to 
Write or Read, carried about with him a Bag full oi 
Recipe^ on one ^de of which he put thole foi: Jnlefi 
and Cardial Potions^ and on^the other thofe for Pur-* 
s and other Phyfick, When he came to yifir any^ 
tok Body^ he put in his Hand at random^ and drew 
forth what came next^ crying, Gad grant it, may dffibei 
go0d^ and fo fent it to the >^jp0^i&ec4!)7. In like manneri 
confidering the Road I had taken at flkndom^ I might 

iay tonw self, G$J^ant, Guzmaiij ir may Jo thee good. 

But as JDfvin^ PffOYidwQ^ O^ver feadsany Mt^fovcMoe* 


faiici' cm tvii' yHsHi^;, and thiit.M Ehdsbdl: 
taw>wiuitoWn»iyfj>fo even 'the Wori^ Way be tnade 
fpoA Ufe of if v*r coftfider rightly of thitrf^ and We 
ought at kaft to gitd Ttefiks that^ n6c totally 
forgot; for niy pdfti 1 hate more^an t)rcHftafry Reft- 
lbn:ro *mike AckhOwle<3gn\ents oil this Accouht^ ftir 
my Misfortunes hive taken tnt up6n leaving my Mo-. 
th^r's'Houfe, and kiipt hie Company all the while 
vvkhotit giving mfc the fekft Refpic. 'lis cruey they 
come froirt the Handof ' Godj, buk they are tteveithe*' 
lefs. what we draw iipoh cJur felvfes bv onr , ill Con- 
tduar. TliereiS^howevei-yagfeatDiTOrenc'ebef^ 

Misfortunes • thofe diat c6me from the Hafid of God 
he may deliver us from If he oleales^.they are Uk^ 
Mines of fine Gold 6r ^On^ tKamowdsj wMcft the- 
Hand of a skilRil Wot*ftian can bring td-Perfeftioft 5 
but for fach as a M&n brings »up6n himlelf by Ms 
iiTOguTar Cortdua, they are gildetf Pills, which both 
deceive the Taft ahd Sight by thei^falfe Appearance, 
dnd' difordcr and dvertdrn the WhoF* Conftitudtto 
rftheBody. ' ^ •^;'^ 

: Setting out theny as IVe already acfqmaiAted you l! 
did, 'I tra^reird two Leagues that Morning, WMch,, 
itoo' itot very large, wa^ rieverthelefs a: gireat dieal for 
a yociAg Man to do, who had never gofie fd far out-^ 
tidit fii his Life, and who, befides, had had his BeBy 
fell of Wind for tw^ty four Hours together. I Wds^ 
you may guefs, fwihgin^Iy tir d, and believ'ai was ftoc 
<o the Antifod^sy or had dilcoverdihOther World, like 
C(?W^/^,;When I few' in Inii before rtie. This Inn 
l:^htgr'd all fweaty^ ooverd with Duft, quite har-^ 
tafs'd' outi arid damnable hungry, as you may con- 
clude from whatl'have already told you. Being 
Noon, I eriquirUA>rf>inner> arid Was iAform*d there 
l^^e •only- new^aia -Eggs in the Houfe.^ -As for new- 
* laW Iggs^ciuofli IJ they may A6 W;fett enough if they 
drexeaftly fo/ *Yeu%eed^iictdool)t that^faid the Ho- 
aeg^,^^i«i*f6ei<ig-a^liPFa#^ttdy^^ bad 

u^ 2 agood 

a jgo&d Sfccmiach^ fiie thought Ihe might f«t any 

tlung upon tne« Laughing in my Fac^ with a ga; 

Air^ ihe asft'd me wh^ei came. I told her^ from 

&vU. 'And whether artthougoingi Child?. cricdihe> 

prnting at tlie fame time her amy Fift under my 

Chops^ and iki^ing as if ihe would kifs me. This 

made me to turn mj^ Head^ but which I co]ild not 

do fiidn! caoA^ to alroid'A be^^iy Belch diat came 

hot fxtom her ^tomadi^ which no doubt would have 

p^iboiM me^ and ccHnmuhicated her Difiempers to 

m^ had not I tumU fii haftily aboutj and by thai: 

means eicap'd the greateft part of the JsikSdon^ 

What I had of it^ fat ierv illupon m&> and if I had 

had any thing m my Beliy bdides^ I ihould un« 

doid>tediy have vomited. To be dvil^ neverthelefs^ 

and aniwer^ her Oi^ftiDn as well as I could^ I told 

her^ ftretching form my Nedc as far as pol£ble front 

her^ that I was going to C6urt^ andtlefir'd her only 

to give me fotoc Dinner. She theil made me ik 

do\Mi to a tfaiee Legg'd Cricket that was fobie what 

cnccy^ and laid b^ore mey for a Napkin5 a courie 

Ciodi .that had Imt newly clean'd the Ovea On 

this Ciodi ihe plac'd for a baltfeller the bottom of a 

fcrdcen Eardsen Potj^ with Salt mix'd with Dun and 

Greace ^ and gave mc to Drink the Water ihe. juft 

then took from die Chicken^ which was hioddyj and 

2a.the fisne Earthen Veflel. Having tbids done^ ihe 

let before me for Bread, a piece of a Cake as black asf 

my fibt^ and at the mat jdmt ferv'd up in a very 

iiithy cracked Platter^ a fort of (>«r/e^^. which^ never- 

thdeis^ might better be teim'd an Egg-Poukice. 

This umiet^ Breads Drinking-Pot^ Drink^ Saltiellerj 

Salt^ Kcqpkin and Hoilefs^ were all of a Piece^ that 

is to fay^ as nafty and forUdding as poffible j yet I^ 

who had fafted thus long^ and whofe Guts reproach'a 

me with their unkind tjUage^ fell on as heartily as if 

it had ^been the iinefl fet-out Table in the World. 

That X4tii^ make ibmi& Amends for wlias :was naft^ 
• ^\ - -— ^^ - teat 

5i the Life and Mi(m\^ IRwcl 

I eat oA both (ides my Mouthy as Hogs do A6oms; 
I felt indeed fooHMng grate between my Teeth 
that does not ufe to be ia an Omelet^ but that mattef d 
iK>t^ I eat on for ail that, and if diere had been 
twenty little Chicken therein, I had fwaliaw'd ,them^ 
Bones and all^ fb well nigh famifh'd I was. At 
lengthy however, this Omekt &exnid not to have die 
fame Taft as Omelets lis'd' to have, at leaft I £d not 
think it like thoie I had eat at my Mothers Houfe; 
but this I eafdy recondl'd^ bdievine the difference 
of the CoiSntry might be thei Caule of itj knd that 
Eggs were not in all Places of equal GoodnefL In a 
Word, after I had eat all, and that was no^all Jk&«. 
Jlkum neither, I found niy felf fo weil fatisfied^ that 
I thought I was more than ordinaril^r happy in gettini^ 
fo good a Repaft; for moft true it is, that Hunger is 
the bed Sauce, and that Neceflity will force its way 
thro' Stone-Walls. As I work'd with both Hands> 
as well as with both Jaws, the Bufineis was foon qver^ 
and I had met with no Let or Hin^ranoe^ if it had 
not been for the Bread • which indeed I had mudi ado 
to get down. I eat, tis trne^ by Inteihrals^ becaofe 
the Meat being very bad, my Mouthfuls maSL hare 
had time to get into my SK>mach, or dbey would 
have choak'd me. I began with die Cruft of my 
Bread, and ended with the Crum^ which indeed was 
the worft, for it was not above a quarter faak'd r \ot 
as bad as it was, I left none to find Fault wiJtiik l did 
as Boys do by Cherries^ whp, tho' they begui w&b 
the plumpeft and ripefl^ ufually eat aUbcfore &y haire 
done. If this Bread had been good^ three FoBZid% 
according to my Fancy, would not haive la&fied me. 
: Tis true^ that Year the Harveft was Yexy bad in 
Sfainy and then the City of Setnl was wootn ioffcr 
* extreamly, but that's no wonder^ finoe k ieUom has 
Com fumdent for its inhahitant% even ia dbe beft 
of Seafons. God knows wlio is tbe Cavfe of ir> 9nd 
it would mc have become me to dive into is^ Res- 

Bookl 6f GtBhfiaii cTAI^adieJ % ^ 

&ny beciule'I was but k Boy. All I might obferve 
was^ that 'twas the (kme Thing aknoft in all other 
Cities which are governed aBke. They that have 
the A^lminifiratioa of AJG^urs^ do Aot buy their Pofts 
for nodbiog. They muft haye AdYancages one way 
or, other to reimburfe chemfelv^^ and^ as the Say-^ 
ingis^ So many Map fir atts 4/0 f here are ^ Jo manf BhoJ^ 
fuckers art tber/e. Good Times likewile are not the 
beil for &em to Prey in^ but Bad are ever more pro» 
per, when they do not fail tq harass the poor People un- 
mercifidly. Hence it comes, that in few Years they 
are drawn by Coaches and Six^ build magnificent 
Hodes^ liirmih them fumptuoufiy^ qiaincain delicious 
Gardens at vaft Expence^ and go cloath'd, both 
themfelv^ and their FanuUei^ like fo many Princes. 
Do you. think the bare Revenues of their Pofts can 
afford all - this ? No, certainly, there is fomething 
more in the Wind, and, wmch the People ftall be 
ftre to' feel, 'Tis the Abufe of their Power is fcher 
Deftru<%kp!0 of the SubjeA, and to excuie themselves 
they only cry. Why it bdongs to the Publick; as if 
it were not as great a Crime to rob the Publick, as a 
private Man. A venerable and honeft old Gentle-- 
man, obferving one of thefe Officers to exceed his 
Chai|;e, faid to him, out of Zeal for the Publick 
Goo^ Is that Mr. N what you fwore to in 

the Towiv-Houfe ? What sthatto any Body, anfwerd 
he haughtily, fince I'm fatisfied I do but my Duty. 
'Tis probable he caird doing his Duty, turning every 
thing into Money, for he ow'd a great deal ; where-^ 
by having heap'aup a good 3um, he not only paid 
what he was indebted, but in a few Years ere<fted 
himielf into a Great and Potent Lord- Were it mot 
better then, inftead of Oaths which thefe Officers 
and Magiitrates are made to take, which neverdie- 
left do but ferve to damn them, and abufe the Cre- 
dulity of the poor People j Were it not better, I fay. 

That thefp Qmc^ vA Saiploym^ais ihould be f^^^ 

E ^ and 

54 thtafeMndMiimsy iPaiti: 

and the Money ho brotight into the PuUick^Tireifu- 

gy than that t^fc perjur'd Rafcals (hould have the 
jnefit of it* How can thefe ViUains^ who, in their 
exalted Stations, fliouldiefve sii Examples of Gocid 
to others, h^ve the Face to ^condenm thofe td rigou- 
rous Pdhifhrnetiis^ whom they have taught to rob die 
PubUcK ? Ought not ihey ta fear the lame Informa- 
tions beiflg exhibitdd' agaJhft thehi,.^ they have 
earned to be brought againft pdiers for the fame 
Crimes; whl<^'they thenUelves neverthekfs are m^cMre 
guilty of. They diink^^ perhap^^ they ar^ ftelttt-'d 
from Juftiee,'becaufe Ji^lfee is under theirrAdmi»^ 
ftration.. Tb^ govern thereibre as they pliaie, and 
cilery thing is right that they do. They Agree- ai 
mong thetnfelves, and &ake Hailds retiprocally; 
To my it Is my Turn, -and to morrow it^Aillb* 
yours. Do but fuffer me to Buy, and FU pertnit yoit 
€0 Sell/ They regulate th& Markets as they think fit, 
and pur whit Prkje they pteafe upon Pirovifiotis. 
They are' not i:)sdy Si^^^eiPvilors of the Fsftrm^ but ar^ 
oftentimes the Farmers tfeemlelves, under jborrOW'd 
Names j or elfe they let Thb(S farm the Pbbiick R6^ 
venues whom- they have^ light Underftanding with; 
and from ^ whom they draw great Sbms by way of 
Partiiei-ifliip. Iii a Word,- without explamiiig my 
felf further, What do thew pretended Zealots tor the 
Good of th^irCountry^pi; that does not turn to their 
own particular ProiSit ? We always hear them mako 
a Noiie • abotit their Services and Sufferings, - and yet- 
in a few ITearsyou fce*^thehi rife out of the Eatth tko 
Aiufliroms.' Thefe are ihe Animals thai lUngsarci 
generaHy ferv'd by, for Republicks have for the tftoft 
part more 'Caution, and piit into thefe Pofts Perfons 
of greater Integrity. Or this we have many Exam-f^ 
pies, and I fay nothing but what every Body knows 
as well as my felf. I fay again, that at Se^H thefe 
Abufes are greater than ordinary, elpecially as to 

Corn, and whatever eUe the Earth produces^ whichi 

: '^ perhaps^ 

^riiaps^ 1i tbefeaVodts as fei^ s^inao^ i^tHf^ain, 
zad vt^Mefi toiife^^ently ftoutd bcca^n lA^iuadairae 
ia tl^e diey ^ bat Thaiikfe be tb ^cha QendokehithSc 
ha!<^ chd Adlnbl^dori 6^ Pifbldt Maeeb»;r«bti^s 
<as gr^afSv^^ty there as 'd^fiwher^; aM aboni^ 
this Yea/^ WhetttMied'tAift tiponnv/nobld'Ek^ 
-didbal I jmoW'Wiiat Reafons tfiighc;be j^tven fi^io; 
t>at tha' I JIiQtfdt^U thetnj atid Gotnment )^<^ Jsheoi 
-S^^er fb^ trtnchj' ilhele PrtaS^tesr'would riot- tucjle- 
=fiMimVI; Tte'PfetJbhi ih4t tiai^tlie'Sapdt^lntcndtiidr 
«v!eF «|^:-«-e? Ibterefted4i^«hdin;<aikl will tellry^ 
•fh^i-e are fiXB&'Bttis that '(kig^t to be tolerated; -art3 
that'if ydb.|!luMeia Nfen's Ubdy'tciO-mufih, 'tis the 
^ed w^' t€K feftfl Imh' «>> Ws' Gr*ve. What Ai^jtt- 



cttbfehi6d'-^'^ti^y;-hfew '-tHfe'Ki^fe Withy- Tljroat, 
«Hd tli6"*Rln?fyto thy -Backi ' -B|^'*^h«tiPeopJe, ^^S?s©tl 
<3^d; is^ Mdiilfkid ^ tlW i^^fbrri^VeM^fi Hear 
Iftiem biit j^ki"a»d ^diiVr'nffiifiR^efiOfiisei^racIei, 
fd much i^hej^'^feeHi i6 deike'^lid^gdodw tH&ir€b^ 
ttyV btt«3.6«a»^ itijows-wbalTEhfey M -Th^ ©f^ 
tend a^*6f- ^i*'^ theif GbUfi#iy, bat; «6i:«»b «f 
themwiU'e^6 ri^di- A'Fagoe.' ^i^ there be 'ao^^^ 
MicS l«lftiig' tet'tlw buitt, tKej^lifre-both A&hlte^?, 
PidfeMers^afid MaJons. 'If>therei- be ahy^ ^bKfelt 
Wded ttf^.dut^-'tfieyl be fure' t«^ fUmHH- their Hoiifdfe 

to qpnjetof th?^i At anyp^fclicK Auvaionv-nd Ba^ 
tauft ■jir^fiim*' 'to^'^bid'^AbVe 'theft. But t am got 
into too 'Targd'-ft Sea,-ahd F find I ftall- be Ship- 
'wreck'd if 'P^fbceed ftriiheri therefore I had beft 
Eep ^dr0 . iigaih as 'foon-aind as well ^ I can. - 

$€ . ne^ufemdAmm ^tm% 

, , Tliou (ee^:, co]urce(ws Reader^ how ificUtiable JE 
am tofpare^ m Body, and that I can't help telling 
Truth, for the Blood: of me ; therefore I -hope tjum 
wUtcxcufe ite if I Oifefcd *ee, for I proteft I can't 
iielp k: My Pen wiH jTon^etimes fl^ from my Hand(» 
aind aU the Art I have «ani)ot hold it in.. I cajp only 
^rtake nhe: feme Excufe for it the Kfuletecr did, who 
cofiuQg by a Man with hi$ Mule laden, the Beaft hf 
chanie threw him 4^^^^ whiqh Ip Matter feeing, 
Jie tura'd abogt and cried, I hope Fnend youl excpft 
Jhim, for thelBeaft i$ but a Beait. Tq (Tpndude, the 
Bread that I eat in: ttiat damn'd innr wfi$ Curfed ba<^ 
tSao' Hunger taught' me to like it then j j^t I inade 
my felf Amends &erward$ with Win^ Vifhi9h I gpt 
the old Jade to bring out, and which was the beft ia 
all thofe Parts. In a WorcL having p^d my Hoftefi 
what ^ dein^ded, I iet forwards upon my Journey 
jnuch more ^ay a^d brisk than when I left StvU. My 
IFeet, which before wpre fcarce abje tf> b^ar up my 
Belly,' tho' that w^s as empty and light as q>ula b^^ 
now be^gan tp trip jii;, 'and had no occaGpn to bf bid 

the; D;oner J had eaten^ and'which made me'jCQ nuiH^ 
•a thouiaiKl Refledion^. Tho](e Ijlctle Things in the 
Oixfe/#r, 'Wt^ch cr^H'd between njy Teeth, gave me 
the dlojlt Pifturb^in^^e^ yet I ^ouldnof imagine what 
they ftould be, apd t^e more I though^, of them, th^ 
farther I wer? from Ending thern out j Ijowever, I 
.«ould not jbijt keck at the Kemembrance of them, ajs 
prdeitting to my Imagbiation fpmetlung tjhtat was 
highly riftufeous ^ and IpafhCome. This ,1 wf^ in a 
fnamier cpn§rm'd in, wh^n I r^edj^hovvill leaion'd 
.and black the OtntUt was, and which lookM as if it 
Jiad been fried in Candle-Greace^ and ^olour'd with 
Can^le-Spuffs. ,}J[y Ifoftefs allQ, jyith feer Blear**- 
^yes, came' into my Mind, and madS me ready t6 
ipH^ which, in eifedp l^erwards did. At length. 

B9olcL tf Gs^amJtmaOic: If 

by meer dinit of Thtnkingy I ftnded I had fbonS out 
the SecceV and 'Which was^ thdc iby Ometkt was 
Amphibiotts^ haying fofnechirig that flioDid noc 
be mere. Thi$ J was alto^cher ooAtinc'd of^ when. 
in ajbont an Hoars travelhng more, I foundl ooola 
go no further withoiit making Reftitution, aodwhich 
made die Matcecolam^ which before I but fandod. ▲ 
Wooiftti in Ti^vdi icould not endure worfe and mom 
iBclang Paom dbaa Jl 4id at firft^ butatlengdi^ aftdr 
feveru Spoofis^ I found my felf eafiet^ but was neveiv 
thekfi bTOtie^ all of a iudden io weak, that I codd 
Jiardiy (land. The Thou^s how I fhoold get to a 
lodg^ did nor a little a^d: m«3 having at leaft 
two Leagues to go before I poald c|>me at one ; but 
wl^ I wzs idms ptiiik^j. my good Fortune would 
have it^ tha/t a Mdefe^ efuae l^ with fome unladeii 
}Mc$^ who iepipg mein^that 'Condition^ bo. 
iriended m9> «s ypp ibaU ije^r i|i th« following 



jGazinan le//r #£e Muleteer »ka had hf4jk» Um 
tutb Idf Hifitfij . attd rtfieSt i^om iktmeetf- 
firjf Ijo^ter, Then he uBt you Two mk 
T4es 5 One of a CovOmu Vhfnm^ ma tSe 
other haw Tvpo Soldieri firv'J fit HojUjfs j ip«^ 
a Ufi, jMr $ifto a L^tamed JO^fimJe Mitft^ 

• - * " fl 

' * * ■ 

TH£ Mikt^er ibeing me io Sad and Melanpholv^ 
leaning ag^inft the Wall of a Vineyard^ leem'd» 
as I fancied^ to .have fome Pity onme^ and ftopjping 
iask'd me what m^de me to look fo pale. I told him 
wh§t h9fl haspfo'd (p pK 9t Che JLon^ wherejqxM 

±e Vast wpi £o *great a Laughtefy thkt^ I thought he 
;would> hare dtofd fr^m^ ms MtHL and which- hfe 

h^ i&taihifdonti if hehad'itci'rappotted Him&lf 
,mch4)Qfch .Ius:*fiMtdis. > This bynb^neaiis plMs^m^^ 
^orit iniift iieedi1>6diragyeeable' to Mii imdiijr ^AfflU 
ifii6]i(,jJto he k[Ugh\l at^ for what ^he' 6^11^ l«sl]>;:;^^]»^ 


id»jnorc. • I wsi v|io^ ways provide* • for fi^, 
nehfeer with SN*o¥d b(5f QuaAer-St^, ktiA foir. iPiftV 
J£:dfsi I j(new h# ^mafb nedds'^t)^ too hard foir tiie ^ 

'tis better to Diflemble than Contend. 1 jocularly, 
h a wwof, fta^ f t liliu lu mAJeiftaiid f was JlfplcasM , 
and faid to him. Well Friend, and what makes you 
fo merrily difpoa^^l I BfefifechiySI, What makes you 
to laugh fo heartily ? Is it that my IJIofg^ ftands awry, 

Mib^^.Thi8.jnaibi»lh!in\but l^^fejbb nkiSre^f^lknrer- 
^Jel^^? at;l^ngtfcilofiWy;aii3 fai^^-^U^Aotnat^ou 



^ on 

faief}|rf*my : IM&e^" and ill ttfil yoathcvSlory^arWe 
pfe^long. This iaft Comirfiihem iB»d^ ine full' A- 
tmofk for whathe had done bcfoFoVibi'iJvithoutf^itlr^ 
bfeekty, I got lip on one of m Beafts; a^d^- Was 
mi^to gi\:e h&m Audience ai iboA;a!5 he*lli^uia^ be 
Li d;fpos'd 

•t. • 

dij§>d&'d to he^/ He t^Id me thbiij ^kt thef^ twb 
Soiiim comiAg' kito the lame Inii^ ^u<h about the 
time thsrt i w^tit ^Mc^ they ask'd for iSmething t6 
eat^ 90d the Hoftefs aniwerltig them'^as;ihe had don^ 
me^ ihiftt file had heih^g but Egj^^' they b|d her 
mak^ Feddy a good4mi»^r^ which Ihemd^ apa brbuglft 
them|fmt when they were about to cut it, their 
Knives fouhd Reftftenoe in feveral Plteek This tiuh- 
kifigdiMii thiidc 'tfka:6 Wi^ fomethih^ ik it more than 

ihoiddbfc. th^ coiifemed to tear If t6 pieces', Mfhich 
they (fid^imo tteee-l^abs, and* theifety dilcover'a 
tworor*tlik'6e finallSilftips^ wMcti, up6h IHife Atoa; 
they §kiii$ to be To n^^ uhfori^^d Chtelbehs, . whofe 
fieadi» ini B^^wfertf fottie^hatf hta/d^afid plainly 
fliew^dvhattheyMtere; -The^tkets'fSiAighowtM 

ThcHiiiefs toW tfeehiy (he had^ Juft' been fcalW a 
&ffeiiy % fort of •Sea^Fifli BW * S&^/, of which, 
If *Sr: pleased, fhb ^ould broil %htm two "of 
Area Sices/ They bad feer do fo, ^ and told her thejf 
wottli tey hfcr Whit flie deferr'd: -iBttt "as fiie wa$ 
br(41^^1tms ll^ifli over the Kre, oife of my Comrade^ 
cad».tip^O hery ^ith the uneaten ,<)^fiff, and wicB 
all hS^force fl^*d i(f in h» Face3/iftfomuch that ribe 
£g§^fticking hkS'a'PIaiiler, (he Was blind for a good 
whriiiftier, and not bfeing abiejJrl^feikR^ to get' it oflE 
baul?4©|^:ftff Heip^ as ifihe had been ftui/c. At th^ 
?ny<iSfer^G}c«n^fede.came up, who,, (eeming to dilSp- 
prw« of 'ivhat Ms 'brother. $oldier had done, gave 
his landlady g6od;^ords, but at the lame tiiriq 
ftfoKii%' her over" the " Face with aii^dful of Spoti, 
mad^herlook tike lany Devil. This done, theybot^ 
wehf routcrf the Houfe, calling, their Hoftefi ol^ 
TootWefi Bitchy for treating Travellers aft^r that 
'ate, and giving them Flefli on Saturiaysy iyhcn they] 

ftodd eat none. Now, quoth tlic 'Muhrccr^ do you 


j)ot think this old Hag made a line Figure witb her 
black and yellow Face; her Ble^r-^Eyes encircled 
with a red Cslhm^ and funk { know not how far into 
lier Head ; her, tum^-up No(e with wide gaping 
>foftrils; and her Splay-mouth ftiMch*daYara wide. 
afKl fquawUng as if fhe had been damn'd in H^U^ am 
whercj indeed^ fiie ought to be. The Afithw had 
icarce ended ^$ Story before we met two Friars 
Qti die Road; who^ ieetng us afkf off, had WM»d 
pH we came up, that they ^ Ukewii^ might hftte the 
jbenefit of ridings of which it feems they hdd. great 
need^ being fwingingly tir'd as well as my (elf.. They 
.Quickly agreed wit^ the Mul^ter to carry them to 
C^^aUa, whither he alio was g^ing; a^d havinj^ 
mpuoted each his Beaft^ we jogjg'd on at ab eaiy 
race. Whilft we were thus ambUiG^ ^V>ng^ dyt jMu^ 
letter refum^d hi$ Stoiy > and^ in conqlufioiK told tii the 
bare Remembrance how that old Jade ch aa Hofttfs 
jbad been ferv'd by the two Soldiers, would ferve hini 
for Laughter all .^h^ Days of his Life. I repUed^ and 
It will .|ei;ve me no lefs for Vexation^ in tikt I could 
not be reveng'd on .the old Hag as they were ; but 
patience^ qpcdi I^ Ihe is not dead yet^ and I may 
|ia ve a fling at her ugly Ciipps before i die ililL The 
£ood Fryars^ feeing me in fuch a Paffion^ ask'd the 
Muleteer what: had been f;he 09<;afion of k. The fly 
Rafcal defiring no jbetter Sporty began my Story ar 
ne^j which^ you i9ay imagine^ y^as hp Tmalt Morti-' 
lication to me. The Fryars exceedingly blam'd the 
old Slut's Adion^ apd no lefs condemn'd my Refent- 
ment^ efpepially fince it lafted jTolong; and one of 
them turning to me^ fai<L ^^.You are but a Youth, 
^^ Son^ and that, I iuppole, is ti^e Realcn that your 
'^ Blood is fo warm j but I muft tell you, you oo ill 
^^ to ciye way to your PafEon, and you ought rather 
ff to bridle and uifie your Reientment, and not be 
'^ forry, as you pretend, that you did not take Revenge 
f^ upon that mitera|>le pl^ Womjij. JHe we« pij, gnd 

Boollt 0/ Gttiman d'Alfa^ 6i 

read me along Ledore Gpoa die Stff and bad CooCb* 
quences of Anger and Kereoge^ edMttmg me tor 
p^on Infuries after the Exampie of. OKBi^edSa^ 
vmr I but all he faid had little efifed lUKm me^ and 
I believe he did it only to keep in Mind the mt Ser- 
mon he had made on diefe Subfeds. Such Exhorea* 
tions were veiv improperly tdcke&'d to a Youth as f 
was^ 1^ much more to toch a Mdetetr as onrs^ who^ 
did nothing but latigh all the while.our good Fadier 
was preachings and throwing away his Fioas Inflru-^ 
Aions^ back'd by feyeral Paflagesoutof the Scriptnrej: 
on die who fo lltrle nnderftood dirm. Nererthel^^ 
as I hare always had a good Memory^ I ienienrf)er\l 
fuch as I lik'd t^ftof them^ and ^diich are as follows* 
^^ If we confideir lA^oAjj laid he^ what greater^ and 
^^ eren more glorious Revenge caa there be^ tl^ tQ 
^ have had it in otir Power to Revenge an Infnry^ 
'^ and yet not to have d(»ie it. What is more (kame^ 
^^ fizl .ttian tlus Paffion^ even before God and Man, 
^^ fmoe it \s nothing but what the fierceft Beafts 
^ are nu^ fubjeA t^. It is only excufable in Woment"^ 
^ on account of thdr natural Weaknefe ; for as to 
^ Man^ ibmedung Greater and more Rationd is ex^ 
^ peAed from him. - Pardoning is die Si|^.of a great 
^^ doul^ that knows how to - conquer it felf^ and 
'^ mafter its Paffions. The Revengnd Man becomes 
*^ diminal^ and fubjed to Juftice ; whereas the Lord 
^ of the Creadon's Buiineis Ihould be to judge Up- 
^^rig^tly^ and afford Mercy. We depend not on 
'^ our felves^ but on God^ who is our Creator^ and 
'^ to whom alone we are indebted for all we enjoy. 
'^ If alt we have*i)c his, «id we have nothing of 
^^ our own, who is that can take what we have 
'^ from us ? He that offends us, offends him. Crod 
'^ has reierv'd Vengeance wholly to himielf ^ and for 
^^ us to think to revenge our ielves, and thereby en* 
^ tfench dbthe Almighty's Prerogadve, is the utmoft 
l^Infolence and Temeruy* We oixK at |)eft but 

f revenge 

^whereas. God can do itJiltehiBiteUj a^(l fb$it le-o 
^>^ v'erely. Let iti Ie«re the& tl4s Oifice tp hiqi^ whois 
^teft able ca do: it e£fet9luy[|y* It canpot^ ^^ 
^>^\fiiA^ in reganl that M&q is q£ no long^diiukdm. 
^- Stnttay tho a Heathen^ giVe^ us^ m niaue^/ ^ 
? Example of.v^at Claimasis. ought to 4o. JBi^g 
'^ t>ffe Day in the Markec^I^cey and cme of \m Jiae* 
mies happening to iland by him^ he aIlo£ afud- 
. den gave himia Kick. The hSdoay to fy^k; truth^ 
^^ was oafe, atttiLChe Injury, very, great. Tboie 
^^that fiood byv and £lw. wtMt had been doiie> .^r 
^vifed Sineca to take the IJiW of his A4Y«fAry^ 
'^ Which he lauding heartily at^ faid> Whac^ would 
V you have me go to Law with a Beaft, b(9cauie 
^^ he has N05 i xxTOfidet 'it is his Nature 
5^ to kick, and.dierefore ha^e :no more tQ l#y to 
^^ hiqd.' Now was not this the greateft Reveqge he 
f ^ could have taken upon hk Enemy, to fliglit what 
f^ he had dohey and tb liken ^uor to a Beoft? The 

food Fadiec wtent^ on, and.utter'il Wonders on Uiis 
[ead, infomuch that his Sermon and Exhortation 
togeth^ lafted at ieait two Hours, that is,^tUl we J 
came to CamiBsaa ; where, hCu and his Companion 
left us, and went to fup and lie at a Friend's 



i^i I td^mmtf 

m\ t I t i% n« f » tw »■ 

t « 


■ •<•••• ^ « 

'*•«-.• 4» 

^ • '. k|A 


B6okI iD|r <saiiixim <RI^^ 6^ 


» ♦ " I 

■ 'C-H-AP.' -'y;'- ■ "■■;■ 

tQuettttfl ffffr 'Bo» Ik mA tie Mdleteer eta fivt^ 
•veral Parts. «f 4 jvms^ il^k/!?, ^KtitmsM; cf §»•' 
po?.d f^ thml]( hk Hop. 4f Cantifiaoa J^; 

. f^.* And.4^arvard froteedt to Jbew t^'tifif* 

* • • ■ 

FOR my parti Icar'cJ not to leave the Mdetttr^ 
whom asking whei*e we IhoUld Lodge^ he bi$ 

me not tixmble my IMf with that^ for he would carry me 
to one of the beft Iwis^ not only in that Town, but 
ib all the Cduntry thereabqats; aiid where I fiionld 
have no Reafon to fear hatched Eggs being put upon 
me fe^ Aew4aid ones. This pteasM hie exceedingly^ 
for I had a great Defoe ^o make my poor Belly a- 
mends fw the ill Treatment I had met with at the 
other Inn ; and^ beddes, I had more than ordinary, 
occafion^ being extreamly hun^iy;. The fan, in 
Trath, appealed what it was i eprefented to be, and 
the Hoft came to receive x& at ^ Door with great 
CvHlty. The MuUittr wferit.tof^ take care of his 
Malei; but, foir raiy pii!t3 I Hwas-Hatf dead, noi^f 
with ridyfang without 5t^rUp$. but il!b with the gre^ 
JdttfiiQr I had ^before had <M Tb&i" and to whic!^ 
I hfed been btit 4ittte accuftoiii'd. ' My Thighs wercl 
brafi^d^and Stiff, ^my Buttocks Were gapl'd, and^my 
Feet fo furb«fed ^ft* fweird, I coM hardly ftarid^j 
and fo I laid me • dciWh on rf Goiidh to reft my ftl^ 
Whfeh tfi'fc il*ifef«A^' had dohd,. he £^ii|e and askM me 
whetJfcr 1 wotiild'A?>t ^o to Siipj^ii?;, becaule h(?;mu<t 
be tip and out th^ hext Mormrig^^bi^thnes. that h^ 

tnighr:^ b&r.l^i^4JghctoU;&;riU;-'I'toIdium/ WiA 

♦ *all 


6^, UelJ^muimm FattL 

all my Heart j but tho' my Htmger was much^ it 

wji$ QQt ib gr eat as my Weariiififij therefore I defir^d 

him to help me a Uttle to walk^ and I would be o* 

blig'd to him^ whidi he did /with ^reat readine& 

Wnen I had taken two or three Turns I fat me down, 

and we <:aUVl for our Hqfty and told hitfi we ddk'd 

to ko to, Suppen. He acquainted us he bad variety 

6t £diblesj and we had npthii^ to do but to pitcn 

oh fomething^ and. we (hould have it out of hand. 

The AbAiietr whi^r'd in my Bar^ jmd told mie he 

wMjan ^xcdlent Cook) which I was glad to hear, 

but, withaU^ I found himagreatTaiter^ and fancl^ 

he had the Looks of a Rogue. Nomatter, faid I to my 

felf^ if he does but give us ^at's good to eat. let him* 

be as much a Rogue as he will^ that flian't onend-me^ 

He was a plealant for( of Fellow^ and^ feeir^ we 

badl beipoke nothing^ he came up again with a whim-^ 

fical Behaviour/ and ask'd us if we would have any 

VeaL for that h<$ had juft kill'd a fine ht Calf^ and 

we mould have what joint we pleas'd of it. He (aid, 

he would not have killed hnn yet a-while^ if the 

Drought of the Seaibn had not oblig'd him to it* 

We told him^ we lik'd his Propoial very well^ and^ if 

he wou'd« Ke might dr^fs us a finall Joint preiendy. 

But now 1 think on't, ^ed ly a Jomt will be coo 

much for us two* As to that^ faid he^ I have ibme^ 

what juft ready that wiU fit yon, What's that, qaod^ 

t. The Calve's Pluck, rcptied t^, and 111 warrant 

the beft that ever you failed in your Life. Go fetd^ 

it, (aid I^ but pray let it be well ieafoji'd : Leave that 

co^ me, quodi he ; and fb taking a Skip into tbo 

Kitdiin, he, alincn as quickly as 1 hlive been ^pe«k^ 

ing, returned, with a Sallad m one Hand^ and the 

pretended Calve's Pluck in the odier. As for the SaU 

Ud^ I though that coo crude and cold fen: my Sto^ 

imach. that had been ib long empty, and fb fell on 

the Plucky which was one of my greatef] 

my greateft _ , 
leaving the Muktm t.Q eat of wl^cb he pleasU H« 

Book L of Guzman d'AIfarache. 6$ 

at firft chofe the Sallad. The Pluck was FricaflTeed, 
and look'd tolerably well^ but there was very little of 
itfortwofuch hungry Fellows as we were. I nofooner 
touch'd a Bit, but I fwallow'd it, (b I gave my felf no 
time to tail whether it was good or bad. The Mu- 
Utter y oblerving how luftily I laid about me, thought, 
if he lef me go on after that rate, I fliould loon 
empty the Plate, for it was no better; therefore, 
quitting his Sallad, he came to help me, and between 
us we quickly devour d the Tluck, We called for 
more, but a le;fs Morfel was brought us, our Rogue 
of an Hoft thinking to conceal his Villany by fhar- 
pening our Appetites, for as long as we had little to 
eat, he thought we would feed heartily, and confe- 
quently not mind what we had, but ftill call 
for ipore as foon as that was done. This fecond 
Plate was as quickly clear d as the firft, and we muft 
needs have a third. I now began to flack my pace, 
for I did not find the Taft of our Dainties fo exqui- 
fite as I at firft imagin'd, yet did not know but the 
Hogo might proceed from the frying, and fo pafs'd it 
by. Neverthelefs, finding every bit offend me, I en^r 
quir'd of pur Hoft, if he had not fomething elfe to 
give us, for I had eat enough of that Difli. He told 
us, if we pleas'd, he would tofs us up a Ragout of 
the Calves Brains in an inftant. We bid him do fo ; 
and that we might not be idle in the mean time, he 
fent us up an AndouiUe made of the Guts and Appur* 
tenances of the fame Beaft. This, he fent us Word, 
was* an excellent Tit-bit ^ but I could not be of his 
Opinion, for I fancied it tafted of Mules-Dung, or 
foQiewhajt worle, which dilgufted me extreamly. 
This ijiade que to rife from Table, and leave it en-r 
tirely tp my Companion, who from the beginning 
had fed like a Farmer, and continued the fame rate. 
At length the Ragout of Brains carne up, when I 
thought to make my felf amends for the badnefs of 
th$ AndouiUe. Thi^ Ragout was made witl^ Eggs, 

* ' F into 

66 The Life and ASlions Part I. 

into a fort of Omelet; at the firft Sight of which^ the 
Muleteer fet up fo hearty a Laugh, that I thought he 
would have fplit Jbis Sides. His Mirth offended me 
as before, for I imagin d he laugh'd on purpofe to 
put me in mind of the other Omelet ^ which had made 
me fo cbnfoundedly Sick, and to difguft me againft this. 
I gave him to underftand as much,but he ftill laugh'd the 
more. Our Hoft, who neither knew certainly why 
he laugh'd, nor why I was angry, but guefling it 
might be about the Brains, and feeing me threaten 
the Muleteer to throw them againft the Wall if he 
laugh'd any more at me ^ our Hoft, I fay, feeing all 
this, was upon Thorns to be gone ; but as 'tis the na- 
ture of a bad Man always to be under Fear and Ap- 
prehenfion, he, tho' he had never valu'd any Body 
in his Life, feem'd now to ftiake and tremble; never- 
thelefs, thinking to hide it by falfe Courage, he came 
up to us with fcign'd Fury in his Eyes, and cafting a 
terrible Look on both of us, faid, clapping his Fift 
to his Bpnnet, 'Sdeath, Gentlemen, i'll maintain this 
to be good Calves Brains, and therefore there's not 
fo much need of your Laughter. I'll bring you a 
hundred Witneffes, if it were neceffary, fliall prove 
they faw mc kill the Calf. So ridiculous a Bravado 
from one we did not fo much as think of, made the 
Muleteer redouble his Laughter, and me to join with 
him, tho' I had no great Stomach to it at that time. 
This altogether difmounting our Bully, who, con- 
fcious of his Guilt, was afraid, even of his own 
Shadow, and who, thought every Word we fpoke re- 
pruach'd him with his Crime, he began now to hang 
down his Head, and grow as pale as Death^ not be- 
ing able to imagine any thing elfe, but that we had 
deteded his Viilariy, fince he faw nothing pafs be- 
tween us that could give occafion for fo much Laugh- 
ing and Refentment. However at length recover- 
ing his Courage, and feeing we laugh'd on, he 
proceeded to grow more warm j when fnatch- 


Book L of Guzman d' Alfarache. ^7 

ing the Plate rudely from the Table^ and which, in 
a manner, he wrefted out of our Hands, for we were 
feeding heartily, tho' we feem'd not to like our 
Viftuak ; Gentlemen, crys he. You may go laugh 
and eat elfewhere, if you pleafe, for I will nei- 
ther lodge nor diet any Body that (hall make a Jeft of 
me. Pay me only for what you have had, and go 
and laugh your Skins full. Tne Muleteer^ who was 
ftill hungry as well as my felf, finding the Matter no 
longer a Jeft, turn'd about haftily, and looking fierce- 
ly at our Holt, cried. Well, and what would vou have. 
Friend, who goes about to make a Jeft or you ? A 
Jeft or noty replied the Hoft, 111 maintain 'tis fweet 
and good Veal, and that thefe are good Brains. This 
he utter'd with fuch an Air and Tone, as if he had 
been juft going to beat us ; which my Comrade ob- 
ferving, who, it feems, knew him better than I, and 
was a fit Match for him, he rofe up, and taking upon 
him the Bully in his turn. What, fays he, and are 
there then Orders in this Inn that determin how far 
and when a Man (hall laugh, elpecially a Stranger 
that comes hither for Lodging ? Or is there any Tax 
that has been laid by ' the Government upon Laugh- 
ing, or are you employ'd to colled the^ Duty ? Or if 
none of thefe, pray. Sir, tell me what means all thb 
Interruption ? I don't mean any thing of that, re- 
plied the Hoft, grown fomewhat more mild, I only 
fay, 'Tis not reafonable that any Body Ihould ridi- 
cule ttie in my own Houfe, or make me pafs for one 
that did not treat his Guefts well. Wno fays any 
thing of treating yonr Guefts, quoth the Muleteer^ 
Do you but fet down the Plate as it was before, and 
you fhall foon find it was neither that we laugh'd at, 
nor complain'd of j but, I ftiould think, y;ju ought to 
fufFer every Body to laugh as well at your Houieaselfe- 
where. The Hoft then let down the Plate again 
foftly, as he had found it. Npormypart, cried my 

Comrade, If I had a mind to laugh at any thing 

p ^ what- 

<8 The Ufe and ASiiom FartL 

whatfoever that belong'd to you, I would be fure tp 
tell you of it. But 'twas this fort oiQmtkt you have 
given us that occafiond our Laughter, and which 
brought into my Mind an Adventure my little Com- 
panion here had to Day in an Inn where he dined. 
The made me laugh, and not your Brains, nor your 
Calves Head, of which I did not fo much as think. 
Our Rogue began now to be altogether appeas'd, in- 
'fomuch, that the Muleteer fet about telling him the 
whole Story of the two Soldiers and the Hoftefe, not 
omitting what Share I had in it, which, neverthelels, 
I was fain to hear with Patience^ tho' it was the third 
time it had been told. Now the Jeft was, to fee the 
many odd Geftures, and pious Exclaitaations, which 
this noneft Man of an Hoft made ufe of all the while 
the Story was telling, which he often interrupted 
with. Good Jefus ! Holy Virgin I Good Heavens / and a 
thoufand fuch-like Invocations, which made the 
Houfe to ring again, and which he always accompar 
nied with the Sign of the Croft. The Muleteer had 
no fooner done, but burning with a Defire to (peak, 
he began thus : Heaven be prais'd ( lifting up his 
Hands and Eyes in a fort of Extacy) that is has been 
pieas'd to give every good Man Honour and Cpn- 
fcience enough to govern himfelf according to the 
Laws ; but for him that does III, 111 will come of it 
Then taking a ferious Turn or two about the Room, 
with his Arms crofs'd and rais'd towards his Chin, he 
was fome Minutes without fpeaking ; but at length 
breaking forth into z, furious FafSon, he cried, in a 
thundring Tone, How is it poflible that wicked 
Houfe fhould efcape being fwallow'd up ! How goo^ 

. . muft God be, to defer the Pifliifhment pf that wretch- 
ed Wbm^! How can flie dare to tread on the 
Ground, and not apprehend being dragg'd to the 

; C^nttr^ where fome hold Hell is ? I never met with 
.any Body yet but complained of her, nay curft both 

, her ai^d - jigr ^leat. No Body ever wwt contented 

• ... put 

Sootl. of Gdzman d^Alfarache, €^ 

out of her Doors^ but every one left a Mark there; 

that they might never return thither again. Here hd 

ftop'd for a Moment longer, and then began again. 

Is it poffible-, faid he, that all fliould be Lyars that: 

go to that Houfe, and that one honeft Man fliould 

not be found among them to fpeak the Truth ? No^ 

it is not poffible, and therefore all mitft be believ'd 

th^t has been faid of it. All is true, all 13 damnable; 

She ought long ifince to "have been taught how to livef 

more like a Chriftian. Is there never a Smith in the 

Country that knows how to fit an Iron Trufs for hery 

or a Rope-maker that can furnifli a Halter to put an 

End to her Villanfes. O Juftice, Juftlce, what art 

thou become ! 'Tis true, fhe has been forbid feveral 

times to keep an Inn, but what does that fignify, 

fince fhe does it ftill, and carries on her Rogueries atf 

much as ever. Yet, whenever fhe comes to be pu- 

nilh'd, I fhall not be the occafion of it, for Heaven 

knows I wifh her no harm ; but I can^t but pity thofe 

honeft Gentlemen who are daily rob'd arid cheated 

by her. The Juftiee of Peace, Coriftable and 

Headboroughs, cannot but know, methinks, of thefe 

ill Practices of hers ; but then, if they do not punifh 

her, you may guefs the Realbn of it. Good, God ! 

In what Times do we live ! Here this honeft Man 

launch'd forth a deep Sigh, whteh I thought would 

have put an end to his Harangue ; but after fome 

time, he went on again for at leaft ha:lf an Hour^ 

tod then concluded, with a Praife be to God and the 

Bleffed Virgin, in that, for all my Poverty, I have 

not been tempted to Trade after this mannef . £very 

thing is fold with me, thanks be to Heaven, for what it 

really is, and not a Gat for a Rabbet, nor a Ram for a 

good Sheep. Honefty's the beft Policy ; and he thac 

deals fairly, may look any Body in the Face in all- 

Countries wh^tfbeven Let every one take only 

t^hat belongs to him, and not give their Minds ta* 

6heatin^, left at laft they cheat themlelves. HeC 

F J made 

JO The Life and ASlions Part L 

fnade an end at length only thro' want of Breach, 
which we taking advantage of, and not being wil- 
ling to hear any more of his Hypocrify, ask d him 
forlbmewhat elle in the room of the Deferty fori had eat 
little or nothing of the Brains-Ragout,becaufe I thought 
it tailed too much like the AndomUe^ but my Com- 
panion had made Ihifc to devour it all. He brought 
us a Plate of good large Olives^ which I lik'd very 
well, becaufe they relifh'd the Wine, which was in- 
deed excellent, and the Bread, that was much bet- 
ter than what We had met with at the other Inn. 
As for my Comrade, no Wolf ever fed more greedi- 
ly, I- thought he would never have done ; tho' we 
had been an Hour at Table, he feem'd to have as 
good an Appetite as when we firft fate down. As 
we defign d to be gone next Morning betimes, we 
defir'd our Hoft to get our Breakfaft ready early. 
This Order given, we went to Bed, but which was 
only on the Straw, and where we had nothing to 
cover us but our Mule-Furniture, with which we 
kept our felves as warm as we could. What became 
of us afterwards, you 11 find in the following Chapter. 

«<■ ■»» 


Guzman goes on^ and tells hovp the VlBafyf of hk 
Hofi of Cantillana c^^e to be difcaver'd 5 anil 
Tphat afierwards befel htm and the faid Hofi. 

H" A D I next Morning, which was Sunday ^ been 
L plac'd in the Market-Place of 5ew/, or fet at 
my Mother's Door, I doubt whether any Body that 
came by would have known me, fo much was J dis- 
figured with the biting of Fleas that fed on me all the 
Night. Ont would have thought this had been a 


Book I. of Guzman d'Alfarache. 7 1 

Year of Famine for them^ and that my Body was to 
ferve to bring them out of it : Or elfe you would 
have tak'en me for one that had lately had the Small- 
Pox, for not only my Hands, but all my Body over, 
was fwingingly fpotted. It was my good Fortune, 
neverthelefi, that beipg greatly fatigu'd with my 
Journey, and. having drank freely for one that was 
not us'd to it, I flept fo found ly, that I felt nothing 
of the Matter j and the Muleteer was fain to call me 
niore than once e re he could wake me, and when he 
did, he told me, I muft rife and go to Mafs before we 
^^t out- It was broad Day-light, and we were foon 
ready, for we had nothing to do but to fliake off our 
Straws that hung about us, and we were prepar'd for 
our Journey. Our Breakfaft only muft be had fifft, 
for which we call'd, for ray Comrade had all the 
Night flept with his Mouth open, and that was the 
firft thing he thought of when he wak'd. Our Hoft 
told us, it waited for us on the Table* When we came 
down, we found an excellent Piece, as our Hoft faid, 
of the lame Veal, which he had fet a ftewing on pur- 
pofe for us ^ and made a high Sauce, that wanted 
neither Salt nor Pepper. He had, no doubt, his 
Reafons for that. Tne Muleteer did not want biding 
to fit down, he did it without Ceremony, and was 
the firft that plac'd himfelf at Table, falling on this 
excellent Piece of Veal, as heartily as if it had been 
a Capon or Pheafant. For my part, either becaufe 
it was too early for me to eat, or that I had eaten 
too much the Night before, or elfe for fome other 
Reafon, I could eat little or nothing ; neverthelefs, 
feeing the Muleteer feed after that rate, it gave me 
fome Appetite. I knew I Ihould pay never the left, 
and I doubted whether we fliould find fo good a Re- 
paft^ at Dinner, or whether I might not repent of not 
Eating, if I did not. I ft^ove then to eat, and got 
down iome Morfels, but I did not find them (o fhort 
and delicate as the Muleteer pretended. They were 

F 4 oa 

72 The Life and ASlions TartL 

on the contrary very tough; and Fll affure you, their 
rellifli was not extraordinary good. I could not for- 
bear giving my Opinion or them before the Hoft, 
and told my Companion, he ought to have better 
Teeth than mine to manage them ; and befides, that 
I did not think they had altogether the Tail of 
Veal. Don't you fee, anfwcr'd the Hoft, blufhing a 
little, that the Calf has been juft kill'd, and hsfs not 
yet had time to grow tender. That is not the Rea- 
Ton, replied the Muleteer^ but our young Gentleman 
there, I fuppofc, has been fed with Cracknels, March- 
pane and new-laid Eggs, and that makes him he does 
not like this Veal, as thinking it tough, in refpeft of 
fuch fhort feeding. I made no Reply, but I left off 
eating, finding my lelf as well fatisfied with this Vi- 
ctuals, as if I had eaten never fo much-. I rieverChe- 
lefs let my Companion eat what he pleas'd ; and 
whilft he was feeding fo heartily, I had a hundred 
Thoughts came into my Head concerning the Taft 
of this Veal, that of the AndouiUey and that of the 
Brains-Ragout ; which two laft we had over Night. 
Thefe Refledions did not pleafe me, and I thought 
I had more than ordinary Reafon to fufpe6t om* Hoft, 
on account of his paflionate Behaviour when he law 
us Laugh, and the Oaths and Proteftations he made, 
that it was Veal we eat, and that the Brains came 
out of a Calves Head, of which, . however, no com- 
plaint was made. All this, I thought, foretold nothing 
that was good- and altho' I could not yet fee dearly 
into the Matter, I doubted not but there was ibme 
Roguery in it. My Imagination being thus pre- 
poilefs'd, you need not wonder if my Palate Was prc- 
judlc'd ; lo I arofe from Table, being not able to en- 
* dure either the Sight or Smell of that odious Viduals. 
Th^ Muleteer likewife role foon after, and going to 
take Care of his Mules, I ask'd him, if we flioulanot 
call to know what was to pay. He told me, there 
was nothing for me ; and being but a Trifle^ I muft 


Book I 0/ Guzman d'AIfarache. 75 

fuffer him to pay it. This Proceeding I thought ex- 
treamly obliging^ and which exceeded the Generofity 
of rtioft of his Rank^ but I did not think fit to make 
many Compliments upon it, becaufe my Purfe was 
lank, and I had hardly Money enough left to pay 
for two fiich Expeditions more. I therefore fulFer d 
him to difcharge this Reckoning, and believ'd io not 
below me, efpecially at this Jundure, to be treated 
by a Muleteer. Refleding then upon all this honeft 
Man^s Civilities, that is, his lending me his Mule^ 
hisComplaif3i?ceon the Road, his paying this Reckon- 
ing for me, and the like, I concluded, that a truly 
generous Temper was not only to be found among 
great Lords and Princes, but even many times in 
lowly Hutts, and with mean PerfonS^ who, thro* ft 
pure Principle of Virtue, of which neverthelcfs they 
knew not the Name, have naturally done that which 
the Generous, by ProfefEon, have done only thro* 
Vanity, Oftentation, and oftentimes Intercft. To 
fliew my Gratitude to this honeft Muleteer^ I led his 
Mules to Water, and carried them back to their Man- 

Jjers, to the end, that whilft they were getting ready 
or our Journey, they might have time to eat a few 
Oats, and Ibme Mouthfuls of Hay. I help'd him like- 
wife to curry them, and rub their Foreheads and Ears, 
nay, did every thing elfe for him that I could, and 
never thought I had done enough, fo grateful was I, 
at tijat time, to this my generous Benetador. Whilft 
I was employed in this manner, I had laid my Cloak, 
by chance, on a Bench hard by, which, turning a- 
bout fuddenly to take up after I had done, I found it 
was gone. This vex'd me a little at firft,' blit at 
length, fancying fomebody might have done it to 
play the Rogue with me, I grew eafier. I could fut 
peft nobody but my Comrade or the Hoft, for no- 
body elfe was near me, and the Street-door was (hut, 
fo that no Pilferer could come in that way. I en^ 
quir'd then firft of the MftUteer, who told me frankly 


74 ^^P ^'/^ ^"^ Anions Part I. 

and ferioufly, he knew nothing of my Cloak more 
than this^ that he faw it lie on the Bench^ but what 
was become of it fince^ he could not tell. Asking 
the Hoft the fame thing, he appear'd a little in Con- 
fufion^ and foon after began to Curie and Swear^ 
and Vow, that he had not touch'd my Cloak ; which 
fuddain Paffion giving me Sufpicion of him, I did 
not doubt but he had ftoln my Cloak. I never- 
thelefs feem'd not to think fo, and with all the 
Mildnefs imaginable beg'd of him to reftore it me, 
for that we were juft upon going away, and I had 
not much time to look for it. He notwithftandinjg 

Eerfifted in nis knowing nothing of it, and faid, he 
ad not fo much as feen it j which made me>elolve 
to fearch all the Houfe over rather than lofe it, for 
I knew he muft have it, and was certain he could 
not have carry'd it far. With this Refolution, I 
went from Chamber to Chamber, and from Room 
to Room, but could hear nothing of it. At length 
coming into a Back-Court that was near the Kitchin, 
the Door of which I was at fome trouble to unlock, 
I found a great Puddle of Blood that had been but 
lately fpilt. Looking a little farther, I faw a young 
JSiiule's Skin which was juil in a manner flea'd, and 
^had ftill hanging to it the four Feet, and part of 
the Head which had been open'd to take out the Brains. 
I prefently concluded this muft needs be the excellent 
Veal our Hoft had recommended to us, and which I 
could not but look upon with the greateft Horrour 
and Averfion. Thinking it an Adventure of too 
great Confequence not to acquaint my Friend rfie 
Muleteer with it, who had been as deeply concem'd 
as my felf, I went privately and call'd him, to the 
end he might be an Eye-witnels of io egregious a 
Villany, fhewing him the Mules Ears and Hoofs^ 
which made it plain what Beaft they belonged to. 
What think you now, my Friend,quoth I, Is tWsHoft 
of purs a Dog or not ? Do you think now, 1 feed 
. . upon 

Book L (/ Guzman d' AlfarachcJ 7 5 

upon nothing but Cracknels, Marchpane, and new- 
laid Eggs ? This is undoubtedly the fine Calf from 
whom we have had all thefe Dainties j and *tis from 
hence our excellent Poifoner of a Cook has regal'd 
us. What think you now of that admirable Calves^ 
Tkcky excellent AndouUky favoury Ragouty and won- 
derful Stew'd-Meat, with which you have fo plen- 
tifully gorg'd your Guts ? The poor Rogue of a 
Muleteer hearing what I faid, ftood as if he had 
been Thunder-ftruck, and at laft, only (hrugg'd up 
his Shoulders twice or thrice/but anfwer d nothing. 
You fee what a confcientious Rafcal this is, added 
I, who never fold Cats for Rabbets, nor Rams for 
good Mutton, yet could give us a young Mule in- 
ftead of a Calf. This is the Man that thank'd God 
he could fliew his Face any where, and who fo reli- 
gioufly curs'd the old Hoftefs for putting Tricks up- 
on her Guefts. The Atnleteer turn d his Head, and 
went away altogether confounded, kecking a thou- 
fand times by the way, and endeavouring to Vomit 
but could not, fo ftrong his Digeftion had been. I 
foUow'd to go and talk with our Hoft, not doubt- 
ing but ilow he would give me my Cloak, fince I 
had got fo good a Claw againft him ; for befides, 
that his injpofing on us in that manner was highly 
Criminal, he had incurr'd the Penalty of another 
Law, by having a Mule, fuch Coitions as produce 
that Creature biping prohibited in Andalesi/ia. This 
Fellow, however, being not over-fcrupulous, had 
permitted an A(s or an Horfe indifferently to cover 
his Mare. He only took care to keep the Matter 
fecret, that no Body might know what fhe brought 
forth J but then being willing to make what Advan- 
tage he could of the young Creature, he thought it 
Would not be very diffictdt to make it pafs on Tra-^ 
vellers, who are generally Hungry, tor VeaL I 
found this wicked Hoft at the Well, walhing ano- 
ther Piece of the fame Meat, whicix he endeavoured 


^6 The Life and Anions Part t 

to hide as. loon as he faw me. I came up to him 
with a great deal of Refolution, telling him perem- 
J>tprily^ he miift find my Cloak, or I would • bring 
him before thofe fbould not only make him, but 
likewife punifti him for other Crimes. He could 
not imagine I had difcover'd his Roguery, and 
therefore pretended not to underftand what I meant j 
which occafion'd him to look fcornfuUy on me, and 
threaten to Whip me, as, he faid. Boys ought to be. 
This provok'd mc yet more than the lofs of my Cloak, 
and made me to call him Rogue and Rafcal as loud as 
I could bawl, and bid him to touch me if he dar d. 
He came forwards as if he would ftrike me, which 
perceiving, I took up a Stone and threw at his Head 
diredly, but miffing him, he turn'd Tail, and ran 
to his Chamber. I knew not what he went for, 
but foon found it was for "a Sword, which he 
brought out naked againft me. I feeing that,- 
call a him Ten thoufand Cowards, Bullies, Bragga- 
docia's. Blockheads, Rafcals and Villains, for com- 
ing with a naked Sword againft a young Boy that 
he had but juft before threatned to Whip, and 
who had no other Arms in his Hand than a few 
Stones. All the Family came to fee what was the 
matter, and were not a little frighted to find our 
Hoft with a drawn Sword in his Hand, which per- 
haps he had never had before. My Friend, the 
Alukteevy came alfo to my Afliftance with a Pitch- 
fork, and between us we made fuch a curfed Noife, 
that you would have thought we had been all going 
to kill one another. The Neighbourhood hearing 
the Outcry, came likewife to know whence it pro- 
• ceeded ; and finding the Door fhut, would not ftay 
till it could be unlocked, but very fairly broke it 
open. Then enter d a whole Mob of People, with* 
Conftables, Sergeants and Bailiffs ; for, thanks to the' 
Wickednefs of the Inhabitants, there were two Bai- 
Ms in this Town, tho' one had been- enough- tty 

Book I. of Guzman d'AIfarachc 77 

have rum'd the whole Corporation, for every Body 
knows what fort of Cattel thefe are. God deliver 
every good Chriftian from fuch Plagues i for I once 
knew one of thefe efpecially, who would never al- 
low any Body to be Innocent that was brought be- 
fore him J for which reafon he became the Curfe of 
Mankind, and died loon after in the manner he de- 
ferv'd. See then, thefe two Bailiffs came into the 
Houfe to take Cognizance of the Fad, of which 
each would have the Determination to himfelf. The 
Conftables and Sergeants were likewife divided, as 
were alfo the Mob j fome taking one Side, and fofue 
the other; This rais'd a greater Hurly-burly than 
before, and the Noife was ik> exceeding great, that 
not one of all the Talkers could be heard. At laft, 
the Debate beginning to grow warm, each Party 
reproach'd the other with all the Scandal they could 
rip up^ which neverthelefs was for the moft part 
true. They did not, fcruple to difcover all they 
knew of each others Failings ; for thefe fort of 
People rather glory in^ than endeavour to conceal 
their Faults. They defy the World, and whatever 
it fays of them, they never Blulh, becaufe they fay 
they ajre usM to't. Cry they. We ought not only 
to know how tp do our Duty, but likewife to ma- 
nage our Trade. AtJength fome honeft Burghers^ 
who were come in with the reft, made up the Dif- 
ferences, and I were lajd hold of firft to lead up 
the Dance, it being ufual for the Cord to break 
where it is weakeft. I was a Stranger, not over- 
rich, without Favour, without Friends, without Ac- 
quaintance ; and how could I expeA to efcape any 
better. Is not this the ordinary Courfe of Juftice 
now-a-days ? Or do you find the grpateft Criminal? 
punifti'd, or put in Prifon ? No, It is the pooy 
Rogues only that fuffer, tho' their Crimes be nevey 
fo imall. . This is to be feen every day^ but in Iprne 
Countries mor? than others. Being tl^us fei^^'d, 

' ' ' ' '^ tnele 


78 The Life and Anions Part L 

thefe Maglftrates would needs have me tell them 
what was the Occafion of our Quarrel. I acquaint- 
ed them what pafs'd as to my Cloak, and added the 
Story of the Mule ; telling them withall, if they 
plcas'd, they might find what I faid to be true, by 
going into the Back-Yard near the Kitchin. They 
did as I advis'd, but firft feir'd our Hoft, He, poor 
Man, thought that Buftle was all about the Cloak, 
and fuppofing there could be no Proof of the other 
Matter againft him, did but Laugh at it ; but when 
he faw the Mule's Hide, and the other Appurte- 
nances brought fprth, he was ready to drop down 
dead. Upon Examination, he confels'd rather more 
than he was accus'd of; fo true it is, that fuch 
Cowardly Villains, when they come to be tried for 
their Crimes, have leaft Impudence where they have 
moft occafion for it. I was very attentive to all was 
faid to him, and When he came to be ask'd for my 
Cloak, expeded he would have own'd that piece of 
Roguery as well as the reft, but to my great Amaze- 
ment he denied it, and that, I fupposd, thro' Re- 
venge. Nevferthelefs, I us'd my beft Endeavours to 
find it, and fearch'd all the Houfe over once more, 
but in vain. My Rogue was fent to Prifon, and it 
was under Debate whether I ftiould not be fent with 
him for Company, for I look'd like a Lad of a good 
Family, and twas more than probable my Friends 
might have Money enough to redeem me ; therefore 
the Sergeants advis'd the Bailiffs^ not to let flip fo fair 
sn occafion, but to kill two Birds with one Stone. 
This had undoubtedly been put in execution^ had 
not the honeft Burghers oppos'd it, who faid. It was 
a Shame that I fliould be punilh'd for nothing, 
but detefting the Villanies of fo great a Rogue as 
this Hoft was. This fav'd me, and I could not but 
return Thanks to thofe honeft Men for their kind- 
nefs to me. The Muleteer ^ who was as much afraid 
of being feiz'4 as I, and having his Mules and Jour- 

Book! of Guzman d^Alfarachc. ^p 

ney ftop'd^ no fooner fa w himfelf cleared by my Acquit- 
mentj but he whifper'd me in the Ear, and defir*d I 
would be going out of a Town where Juftice was 
altogether at cne Magiftrates Pleafure, and where 
one was treated one Day after one manner^ and 
another after another, I confcnted, tho' I was not 
a little unwilling, you may imagine, to leave my 
poor Cloak, which I was never likely to fee again* 
We mounted foon after, and made haft out of the 
Town till we came to the Place where the two 
good Fathers ftay'd for us, and who had waited 
our Coming a confiderable while. \ told theih the 
occafion of pur Stay ; but as for my Friend, the Mu^ 
UutTy he had not a Word to fay, being wholly taken 
up with Thoughts of the two admirable Repafts we 
had had. The Fathers feem'd much concerned at 
our Misfortunes, efpecially the lofs of my Cloak, 
which they faid they believed was not retrievable. 
I were much of their Opinion, and wifh'd I could 
as eafily digeft that Lofs as I had done the Mule, 
but Impombility has no Remedy but Patience, and 
that thefe good Religious Men advis'd me to. * 


Mans Misfarttnkf are here difcoursd of*^ and for 
that purpoje, a Storj told of the Gods of ancient 
Times. Then Guzman tells you^ hovo he was ap-^ 
frchended pr a Thief and by what Means he 
came to be released. . Lafily^ one of the Gentkmen 
promifes to tell a Story ^ which you have in the 
folhwing Chapter. 

THE Egyptians y a very fuperftitious fort of People, 
were formerly, among other Errors, guilty of 


8o The life and Anions Part L 

worlhiping Fortune. They celebrated Feafts, in 
Honour of her, every firft Day of the Year^ and in- 
vited all the Great Men to coftly banquets. This 
they did out of Gratitude, for the Favours they be- 
lievd they had received from her the foregoing 
Year, and out of Policy to engage her to be as kind 
tp them for the Year to come. They look'd upon 
her as a Goddels, who difpos'd of all the good Things 
of this Wprld, who took away^ and gave as me 
thought fit J who, governing every thing, prefided 
over all, and, corifeqiiently, they thought 'twas to 
her <:hiefly Men ought to pay their Vows, and offer 
ttieir Sacrifices, fhe being not only the Source of all 
Good and Evil to Man, but like wife the Miftrels of 
all the other Divinities, who could enjoy no Happinefs 
without hen They could not believe this cou d have a 
natural Caufe, but thought fome invifibleand omnipo-* 
tent Hand muft have the difpolal of it. What made 
them of this Opinion, was the daily Misfortunes they 
faw happen to fome Men ; who, beginning to fink, 
were all of a fudden o'erwhelm'd and undone, with- 
out knowing from whence their Difafter came, or 
what had drawn it upon them ; and that, on the o- 
ther hand, fome others ftiould be Ihatch'd from the 
very brink of Ruin, and rais'd to exalted. Stations, 
without being able to guels what had been the occa- 
fion of all their Happinefs. The Egyptians wanted 
the Knowledge of a true God, otherwife they mighr, 
in fome mealure, have accounted for thefe Effeds of 
Divine Providence, and not of any fuch Goddelsas 
Fortune, which never yet was. If I had been as un- 
acquainted as they with the(e Matfers of Faith^ I 
might, like them,have doubted whence my Misfortunes 
^me fo upon the Neck of one another; but I was. fa- 
tisfied, my Sins were the Caufe of it. If myMifhaps 
had come fingle, I could have welcom'd them with a 
Bien 'vengas Malfifolo vienesy Jlfou art welcome Misfortune^ 
providing thou conifi alone j but I had no fboner got 

Book I. of Qxxtvaati d^lfaracht. d i 

out of my Mother's Houfe, but I was furprizfd bv 
Night and Hun^er^ and forced to take up with a bad 
Lodging at a Chapel-Door, .Thert for Dinner on 
Saturday, I had nothing but a Chick-Ometet ; and for 

Supner^ feveral Ragouts made oiit of i Mules Carcafs; 
At Night I was devoured t)y, Fleas, but let that pais; 
Sunday Morning niy Breakfaft was of the lame Mule 
Hew'd, and diiguis d like Veal, and, for niy greater 
Misfortune, t loft my Cloak by the very fame Rogue 
that had poyfbn'd me jult before. If' I bad been lent 
to Prifori with him too, my^ Dilafters had been fom- 
pleat, hut 'twas my good luck, it ieems^ to eicape 
that Snare. If thcfe Adventures of m^ne extend 
themselves iiiudh further, faiid. I to my Telf, I ffiaiH b© 
able, in time, to make i Book oiit of them* What 
ill-boding Star purfues me in ;his nianner, qiioth I^ 
ok rather what Devil prompted raie to^leave my Mo-^ 
ihcr's Ilouf^, from Which time all Thinj^ have gone 
ill with nie. t had heard fay, (:he Life of i Man wai 
Inaae uji of Goodi and Evil, of Plfeafure arid Sorrow^ 
of Joy and Sadnefs j but in my Cafe, the ]3iais rain all 
one >W i arid, in a Word, diiring all the ren^ainder 
6f my iJays, in Whatfoeirer Condition I was, I never 
taftea ^myJbut^falfe'^ Pleafufes, nor felt any but true 
kni laifting Pains. If you are one that will be fatis- 
fied with a F^l6, hearkdn to what follows, o*ri the 

fame Subject . . , , , j i - i 

The ^re5t Cod, Jupiter ^ havm^ created all Thing 
here below, ind Man to eiiJQy them, coriimandei 
the God Fleafure to go airid refide in the Lower Worh 
for the Satisfaftion of thait Creitttre, not believing" 
or imaginirig his Ingratitude would tetnpt hint fo far 
^ to make him forget his Makei^, &nd, foi^ the fatke 
Of a New God, rebel againff that Pow^f to whoni 
he o«v'd hisBeil^. But Mart, ^rid elpefially Womani 
beirfg dhkvttid With this tte\V l^^ity, who was altoge* 
thef to eheii' Liking, thoOght, Ai long as they h^d 
Km. tKey (Kould have 0dc3fi0n for no other Gods,/ 


82 T^ Life dnd Ailioni Partt 

fo Jupiter and his Affociates were left in tbeYutch, 
and no more Refped paid them^ than if they 
had never been Deified. All Viftims^ Vows^ Pray- 
ers and Sacrifices we;*e ofFer'd to the God Vkafure^ 
at which Jupiter being exceedingly enrag'd^ he cal- 
led a Council of the Gods to advife him What to do 
with Mankind. J^e did not care to zGt of himfelf in 
an Affair df thi^ Nature^ that he might not be accused 
of Partiality. All the Gods condemned this Pre- 
fumption of Man^ tho' fome did it more, anafonie 
lefs, according as their particular Interefts or Inclina- 
tions led them'. There \yere a fort of pacifick Gods^who 
much enclin'd to Clemency, reprefented to Jupiter that 
Men were but Men, that is to fay, frail and weak 
Creatures; and therefore, fmce he could exped nor- 
thing perfed from them, he ought, in their humble 
Opinion, to bear with, and forgive them ; for, faid 
they, if it were poffible we could change Natures 
with them, 'tis more than probable we fliouW do as bad • 
or worfe th^n they have done* They have, a God 
with them, whom they fee ^very Day, and who does 
them a thoiifand good Offices, whereas they fee you 
but leldom, and then, for the moil part^^ out of Hu- 
mour, with Thunder in your Hand, which frightens 
them, fo that they are in a manner oblig'd to fear 
but not to love you. The beft however is, 
they are not incorrigible j and if they have done, ill 
for the time paft, they may eafily be prevail'd on to 
do better for the time to come, and fo make fufficient 
Attonement for their paft Crimes. Momus would fain 
hate fpoke here, and began to propofe Matters very 
freely, but he was filenc'd^ and told he fllould be heard 
•inhisTurn. Hehad long wifh'd for an Opportunity to 
find Jupiter but of humour, that he ntight incenfe nimt 
againft Man, aind now he thought he had gof one, but 
he was, nevel'thelefs, forc'd to hold his IPeace. In the 
mean time, thpfe other Gods, who . were not lefe 
fet againft M*an than^4^<?w/y/, did all they- could to 


fioot L 0/ Guitnan d^ AlfaracHc- S j 

exa^rate Jupiter againft him, alledging he Wis ^ 
iifelefi Being, and one for whoiii the Gods had no 
manner of occafion : therefore their Advice was, 
he ought to be altogether extirpated. Such Others^ 
as Were not quite fo violent Againft Mankind, c^otin- 
f^l'd jFi^/Ver to exterminate only the pre fen t Race, 
iand creat-e i ne;W oiie^ Which, they faid, woul4 
be an tify matter for him to do. jlpoiloy who was .a 
great OratOr, finding his Cue was now to fpeak^ he 
put on an Air of Sweetnefi^ which, hoWeter, was 
natural to him ; and having hemm'd onCe or twite to 
clear his Voice, t)egan as follbivs. 
.^*^ Supreme Juptety full of Mercy and Truth! 
^^ that grievous Accufatioii wherevvith thou chargeft 
/Man is fo Equitable and Jttft^ that whatever Re- 
^^ venge thoii art dilpos'd to take of him, none of us; 
^^ I dare fay, will pretend to pppofe it, fince it does' 
^^ not only toricem thee in particular, but all of us 
^* in general, Man having i»een equally difobfedient 
^^ and ungrateful to all; fuffer me, however, t6 in- 
" finuate, if thou deftroy'ft Man, thou deftroy'ft thy 
*^ own Wojk, for what were ^11 the wbnderfiil Things 
" of the Lower World made for, but his tJfe^ And 
^^ if thou tSk'ft him away, and n6he of us go to in- 
;^ habit there, as to be fure we won't, then will that 
'^ part of tihe Creation be to no j5orpofe. Again, if 
J^ thou deftroy'ft Man, with defign to create a nev^ 
/Race more perfect, that will imply an, Irfiperfediioii 
'^ in , thy fdr, fiiice People ivill be ap)t to fay, thou 
/ can ft not be fare of thy Hand at 6nce trj^ing,, 
^^ which,, het^erthelefs, a God ought to be. Permit 
^^ then Mankind to be ^s the^ are, for it greatly cbh- 
^ cerns thy Glory to m'aintiin <ft^hat thoi fi^it <m<5e' 
createdi, i^erfiaps it is not confiftent with the Ho- 
^ nour 6f the Gqds, that Men {hould[ be mbi't per^ 
/ fed th^ihey are, for if fo, what occafiof\ would 
^- they hav« for .our. Afliftance ? Thoti Haft giVerf 
; tfenrf m m^& Fieajhre. ^hom' thejr ^re , fo m^ 




84 The Life anef Midns Parti 

II gratefully fond of, that they have forg;otten thee, 
^^mek Benefador; therefore my Advice is, that 
^J thou punilh them by the fame means they have of- 
^^ fended thee, that i$, fend them down the Brother 
to this Fondling God of theirs, and take him away 
from them, whereby, thou wilt foon find they will 
have reeourfe to thy Mercy in their Milery, and 
beg of thee to free tnem from the Torments they 
*^ undergo. Thou wilt then have Revenge enough, 
and it will be wholly in thy Power to forgive or 
'^ continue their Punifhment. This, Great Jupiter t 
^^ is what feems to me moft proper on this occafion j 
'^ but thou that art Lord both of Heaven and Earth, 
^^ k^iow'ft beft what is fit to be doae, and diereforc I 
^^ fliall defift from any farther Coun&i 

Here AfoUo, ended, when Momtfs^ who, out of his 
ill Will to Mankind, had waited all this while to 
ipeak, be^an to aggravate their Offence; but his Pre- 
judice being fufficiently known, all the Affembly 
were for what was proposed by the God of Wifdom* 
The Execution of this Projed wias committed to Mer- 
cury y who having difplay'd his Wings, cut thro' the 
Air in a Moment j and defcending upon Earth, found 
Man eiFeftually bufied and charm'd with the God 
Tleafure. He attempted immediately to carry him off 
according to his Orders, but found fuch Refiftance 
from both Sexes, that he could not efieft it. They 
rofe up in Arms, and feizing their beloved Goa, 
vow'd rather to die than part with him. The News 
of this Diforder foon coming to Heaven, put Jupiter 
into a greater Paffion than before; when JfoBo^ 
who was always at hand to get Mankind favour d as 
much as poffible, told the Father of the Gods, thar 
he muft once more coramiferate the Blindnefi of 
poor Mortals^ and that nothing fiiited fo well with 
his Divine Ma jefty, as Clemency and l^pderation • 
therefore, inftead of launching his Thunder upon, 
thetn^ as he faw he was. aboy t to 4p, hf need Qnt^ 


Book L of Guzman d'Alfaracfie. % $ 

qircumvent them, by Hiding down the God Dif- 
fatifaSim &iOT\g thtmy in the fhape of his Brother 
the God Tleafure^ and then the latter might be . eafily 
withdrawn from them without their perceiving it. 
This Stratagem was approved, and Afolld himfelf un- 
dertook to put it in execution. He defcended then 
upon Earth with the God DiJfatisfaSiony and found 
Mankind all up in Arms, . with their darling Deity in 
the midft of them, the Women holding him on one 
fide, and the Men on the otHer. ji^oUo immediately 
dazled their Eyes with his ordinary fplendor ; and 
having put the Exchange upon them, left them to 
think they had ftiil Plcafure amongft them, whereas 
it was nothing but Diffatisfa<aion and Difquiet. This 
Error yet c6ntinues in the World after fo many Ages, 
and nothing is fo common as for Men to take that 
for Pleafure, which has, indeed, but the, bare Ap- 
pearance of it. If you doubt of this, you need only 
examine all Feafts, Balls, Gaming-Houfes, Mufick- 
Meetings, and the like forts of Diverfions, which 
ftrike the Imagination moft, and you'll find there's 
not one of them but what is accompanied with Cha- 
pin^ Diflatisfadion, and Difcontent. You may talk 
as much as you will of the Delights of them ^ 1 look 
upon that done out of Vain-Glory, for if you. would 
<?onfels the Truth, I don't doubt but you would own 
ou have been ill diverted, either in that another has 

d more Relped paid him, has been more honeftly 
dealt by, or more Iplendidly entertained. All the 
Pleafures of this World are much of. the fame kind, 
meerly outfide, and nothing fubftantial. True Plea^ 
fure comes otily from above^^ and thither we muft go 
be&re we can enjoy it. 

When this fine Expedition of mine came firft into my 
Head, there was no Pleafure but what I fancied my 
fblf in poiTeifion of; and whereof the bare Thought 
did not exceedingly charm me. I fet out in the Month 
of ^pr\ly wt^iQh^ in Spain, is the moft pkafant of 


$4 The liffMn4 ASIions f^rt I 

all tl^e Year^ and >vhich I imagined would always 
laftj having no regard to^the fuccecdixig Months of 
Mayy Jme^ Juh and Jugufiy when a Man can hardly 
Travel ip. thei[e hot CQuntries^ novltafy, vvhither I 
h^d a mind to go. . J fa^hciecl^ >yhilft I was . on my 
Journey; I fliould /tieef. Mth nothing but fine Rows 
of TfceJs, ynder whofe Shade I might, delightfully 
walk, i reprefented to my fclf large and Ip^cioui 
koads^ y/ivliout the iQ^ft Inequality^ and beliey'd the 
very. Mojuni^ains would withdraw, either thro' Re-r 
iped Of; Friendlhip, to give me leave to pafs the more 
Qommodioufly. I did not think 1 could ever be tir*dy 
tho' 1 had been fo little accuftom'd to Fatigue, and 
fo had no Trouble on that Score. As for Eating, 
that was the leaft of my C^re ; I had read feveral 
Romances, and could find little or nothing of thai^. 
there; but in ,cafe I ftioilld have more occafion than 
other Knights-Errant^ commonly have, I thpught it 
would be anexquil^te Pleafure to eat iri Inns, where 
Ortolans y Partridges and Pheafants, are the, ordinary 
Food. I had not much Money, 'tis true,, to pay foi-. 
all this, but I .(,ruftcd for th^t to my good Mien, ajtid 
doubted not hut I flipuld be credited wherever I came. 
Befidcs, X.knew the L^wsof Hofpitalityj-equir'd^ that 
a Man fhould not be fbrc'd to pay who had not 
wherewithal,, a^d who Ihew'd a good Will. AH this 
m^de me eafy, infomuch that 1 coiicented my felf 
to feed on jvhatever I met with, and believ'd it 
the delicateft Viands that could be. After I had tra-^ 
yel d three Days, I began to wonder how the World 
came to be fo large, for I had never feeu it but in a 
Map, and fancied it not much bigger than it was 
there reprefented. But who could have thought,- fiicj. 
I to my lelf, that I ftiould have ever wanted ibr 
wholelbme Food, or met with fo many bafe People 
ar\^ Misfortunes as 1 have dpne in ib Ihort a time 4 
I did not Qonfider it waj? the way of the World^ axi4 
that a MaA ha4 need hav^a^gre^t deal of Cautioqandt 

Book I. of €uztnan d'AUarache. 8 7 

Pradence that pretends to Travel But this, / dii 
not cmJidcKyAs a very fooHlh iprt qf Charader- Ic 
is the common £:i^cu£b of fuch Fo<^s and Blockheads 
as I wa$y A Man of Sence will always refled upon 
what is' to. come^ and do all that in him lies to pre^ 
vent aijy ilK^nlequences ; and^^abovc all, take care 
to be on his Gus^rd againft Surprizes. Z behaved my 
ielf like an unflcdg'ci Bird, that, had fuft ventur'd out 
.pf its Ncft i God knows, 1 had but little Conducft, 
iWd kis Wit,- yet a gccat deal of Vanity and Indifcre- 
tioo. I was juftly punifh-d for my^ Folly, in leaving 
Biy Mother's Houfe, I bad a mind, like our Firft 
Parents, to know what Gopd and Evil was, and I ex- 
perienced .them with a Vcnge anqe, as the, Sgquel of 
x»y Story will Ihew, I confider'd, that Evil was the 
h& Thing we feek after, and yet the firft that we 
ttieet with. Thus I went along mufing till we over- 
took the good Fryars, who were mumbling over 'their 
$revi0rie^. As for my Friend the Muleteer ^ he was 
likewife icmploy'd in Soliloquies, for fince he had 
eaten lb large a Share of .the Miile, you can't ima- 
gioe how naelancholy he was grown. He was fenfible 
fie had given more than ordinary occafion for Railler}', 
by the excellent Rellifh he found in the Mule's 
Brains, and . other Parts of. that Animal, which he 
had devoured fo heartily ; but i feeing him mortified 
enough, Ipar'd' him. Befides, Prudence requires we 
% nothing to any Man before we confider what he 
|nay anfwer, and if we are in the Rallying Humour, 
wc ihould refle<9j whether we are likewife in the hur 
wour to be rallied. Rallying, however, is good at np 
time : with our Superiours it is Raftinefs, with our In- 
leriours Meannefi, and with ouf Equals it may be en- 
dured, but oftentimes produces Quarrels. One Free- 
dom occafiops another : From Raillery we proceed 
to Aflfronts, fron^ Affronts |o Blows j and when we 
^re once come to thofe, we kno^y not what may 
^©qeaft^r;. prides. Tetters generally, come pff worftj, 

8 1 The life an J AStiona > Fart I, 

^nd no Body pities them. This is of all CharaAeni 
that which is ufually moft hated^ and he is yet to be 
born, that ever got or kept a friend that way. We 
muft behave our felves well to every Body^ if wc 
have a mind any Body fliould do fo to us. We molt 
not rely on our Abilities in this caTe^ for when we 
have abus'd any one that is not of equal Capacity tp 
return the Affront^ he will be fure to watch his Op- 
portunitYj and make us fenfible of our Folly when 
we leaft think of it. A Man is eafily pleas'd; and 
^adly diipleas'd. There are a thoufand ways in Coftih 
verlation to oblige People, which coft little or t^ 
thing. If we are in the Humour to diibUitge^ Vfi^ 
ihall quickly make pur Selves the Town^Talk. Le^ 
us conclude thefe Documents with a cert^ ?^^^(%. 
that nothing is more eligible in the 0>mmerc4^dt 
life^ than an inofFenfive Behaviour towards God^ 
and towards Man. The MuUteer^ as I've alread^" 
hinted^ went fhudging alone;^ not daring to hold v^ 
his Head after the many Jeits he had pais'd upon me 
about my Omelet^ well knowing what Returns I could 
make if I had been difpos'd ; but I was otherwi^ 
employ'd^ and thinking what Cheer we fhould me«t 
with at the next Inn. Whilft my Thoughts wegpfe 
thus buHed^ not dreaming in the leaft of anothm 
Adventure^ I heard fome Mules coming upon tAik 
grand Trot behind me^ I look'd back^ and law two 
Men with fierce Countenances^ whom taking fo^ 
Highway-men^ I muft confefs I was a little furpriz*db 
They looking earneftly at me^ and feeing me in coni? 
fufion^ cried out^ Jby Afr.RogtUy have ii/€caughyoM, 
you fiiont fo eajily efcaf^ tts. noTif of you may wtagine j whidl 
fayin^^ they jump a off their Mules^ and came and 
took me by the Throat, foon dragging me to the 
Groiind, without giving me leave to make any I>e«- 
fence, or utter a Word. Having me down, thcf 
<;ried. Come, Dop where utbif Money I Where are tbk 
Jewels y£u carried aw^ ^oDay^ Xau mt^ reficte the^y 

3ook I of Gazman d'Alfaraehe.^ Zp 

and that infiantly. I was fo ftun'd. with the Blows they 
had given me, that I was hardly able to fpeak j how* 
pver, at length recoverng my Voice, I cried out 
as loud as I could haul, ^^]P' Help! Murther! Mur* 
ther ! The poor Muleteer ^ feeing me fo unmercifully 
handled, would needs interpK>re in my behalf, but to 
his own Misfortune: for going about to reprefent td 
them that they muft needs be miftakeri in me, thejr 
tum'd about to him* and told him they believ'd he 
was the Receircr of the Stokn Goods, andfojim-. 
^mediately feiz'd both on him and his Mules, asking 
him, as they iid me, what he had done with the Mo- 
4iey and Jewels. Thefe Queftions were as bad as 
Higih^Vmcb to us, for we did not underftand a Word 
of what they meant : and being able to make no 
other Anfwer, than that we knew nothing of whaf 
they talked of, they began to fall aboard us afreih, 
and to belabour us fo unmercifully^ that I thought 
they would have beat out our Brains. As we wer^ 
utKier this cruel Difcipline, our good Fortune would 
have it, that two Men habited like Lawyers came by, 
who feeing the Conflables, for fuch tt ffcems they 
were, laying us on fo lufliiy, ask'd them what they 
beat us after that manner for. They told them, I 
was Page to fuch a Lady, whom I had robb'd, and 
that they had a Warrant to feize me wherever they 
met me. You are miftaken, faid one of thefe Gen-r 
demen, for I ferve that Lady, and know that Page 
very well j This is not he. He is about 1 8 or 20 Yeaj^s 
of Age, and this young Man can't be above 1 1 or 14. % 
Befides, he has black Hair, and this Youth Reddim^ 
therefor«e you miift be under a Miflake. The Co% 
ftables then puird their Inftrudions out of their Poc* 
kets^ and found it to be as this Gentleman had told 
thenoi, which made them beg our Pardon, and fb re^ 
mounting their Mules, they left us without any other 
Satisfaftion. 'Twas pleafant now to fee what a Fi- 
gi^r^ the A^hteer madejj who had been fo fwinging^ 

f d Th Life and A&km Bart I 

)paiig'4 for being in my Company,. Hew^.Worfe 
l)€at than I, becaufe hehad the Wpadw Shoulders." 
A& fore as I <vas with beating, I Qould hardly iojrbear 
l^u^hing when I Jook'd uppn him, and \ believe h^ 
Mrifli d me at the Devil for it. for his part,: popr- 
Man^ Laughing was at an end with him, sindhe 
^uld fcarce Keep from Weeping. We, nev^rth^Ieis, 
4ren[K)unted oar Mules, and I thank'd the. Gentlemen 
M^ho had 4on6 i>s this important S^nvice. The)f w^ere 
io kind as to prober to bear us Con^any, b^ing^all 
^oing the fame Way. We foon overtook, the, fry an, 
wjxo never ftaid tp fee the Fate ftf.*ny of cftur :K^ 
Jirentures, to whom, having related this laft as wei^ 
before done the pthers^ they lifted up their Hifl^s, . 
>uid blefs'd and crofs'd themfelves in Ad^uilation. 
3ereqpon one of the two Gentlemen fei^,.GQd 
keep every Ma;i from There /fcA^thtt are in 5';»^V»,viz. 
Ij'liQ Hdj In^Hipion, the Holy Brotherbwir Mid the Ikly 
jl^rupidoi but efpecially, if he be Innocent^. God^eep 

fiim from th^. Ifyfy jBrotherhocdy becJaule, with: the\ jo- 
tter, two, there may be fome hopes of Juftice, they 
being not altogether unprovided of good Judges, 
;ind Tuch as fear God ; but for the f&ly BraihrlmJty 
|ae had nothing more to fay, than God keep every 
^od Man out of their Hands. As for JSergeants,^ 
C^tch poles, and.fuch-like fort of Venmn, he.feid^ we 
i)Kere to expe<^ nothing amonjp;* them . buc^ Rogues^ 
%i\\^\Ti%^ Thieves,, Falfe-Witneffes, and the. like Ral- 
f^ls, \yho for Money would do any thing ; but, ad- 
^ed he^ let^ leave this ungrateful Subje^, an4 pro- 
Qced to fomething that may be • more entertaining 
%fiA agreeable, fdr this purpose, quothhe,ifyott|dea(e, 
JFll tell you a Story I read Yefterday in the Hiftory 
pt our Wars with the Moors. It is curious enough, and 
^her^fpre may ferve to amufe us oh the Road^.\ All 
^he Company faid, they fhould be extreamly iotdisj'd 
to him if he would give himfelf that TmuMe, ian<J 
£b he began as follows.. . .,. ; - 

^ook I. 0/ Guzman d^Alftirache: p§ 


C HA P. VIII, , 
Th A^our of Ozmid m4 Para'w. A Nof d. 

WEfilft the CathplickKing w^ Queen of 5^^fW 
jFdyii»tf«i and ^ahllayweh ^ the Skge ol 
JB^x^^ there happened many CorAiiSts and SkirmrOie^ 
pn both Side$, in which it was hard to tell whether 
had the better. It was not hut their Catholick Ma- 
jeftifl| were wellTerv d by trave Officers^ and a greaft 
Nuiffier of good Troops^ but the Moors were likt-^^ 
wife well skilled in Afihs, ind^ pefhipJS^ not lefs thair- 
the Chriftians, fo that they defended themfelVes cdu- 
ragioufly^ and omitted nothing that might make tfte* 
Siege laft- The. Place was m a^gooq Condition/ 
and had a very adv^mtikgious Situation : The Gaiifori" 
was compos'd of the chojceft Troops the King of 
Qramda had^ and the Governor was a Man of Ex- 
perience and great Valour; fo that all thefe togethei:' 
were able to ballance the Bravery «id Numbers oP 
the Chriftians. The Queen was at Jaenj where flicT 
took Care to fupply the Army with Provifions j and- 
the King commanded the Siege, in Perfoni He had- 
divided nis Army into two Bodies^ * whereof trio lay ^ 
Vefore the Town, and the other op vfef^<3 thfc Si^ge,'- 
and hinder'd the coming of SiiccOufs. The Xfer-; 
queffes of Cadiz, and Agullar^ Dort IkwA Ftmafiin 
"PortocMterQ^ and the CommenJaJprs 6f tht Oxkfers bfl 
Akantarf acjd Caiatrd'vas with* divfeis Bf^e OffieeW 
9nd SoldierSj^ wer^ in the former j andin thfebtter lay^* 
encamp'd thfe King with the chief pF the Nobility 
^d GeAtry, and the moft experJency: Men at Arms. 
The two Camps were at leaff half a, League afiinder^J 
to tsrtfiethem direftlyj, but sks the Afwx had ftop*4 

pa The^ Ufe and Anions Part l! 

up the Pafles^ they were above a League^ io that 
the ChsjS&ZM were forc'd ca draw Lines and Tren- 
ches along the foot of the Mountains to keep up 
the Communication. This made the King refolve to 
build Forts and lte'J(mhs^ as well to favour that Work^ 
as to check the furi90$ a^d frequent Sallies of thQ Be- 
iiegfd. Upon tms^ great Numbers of Men were em- 
ployed, and the King would often go in Perfon to 
fee Hp^ they adtancd. Thb' the Mom did all they 
c^oold to hindor this Defign, yet the Works went on, 
^e Chriflians valiantly defending what they had un-« 
dertaken, tho' with the Loi& of many of dieir Lives, 
for fcarce a Pay happen'd wherein there were noc 

Seat Numbers kill d and wounded on both iades. 
; it was a Matter of the greateft Importancej^the 
King always took Care it fhould be follow'd both by 
Nignt and Day, and that the Workmen ihould have 
4r good Body of Troops to cover them. One Day^, 
as Don Roarigo^ Don Hurtado de Mendozui^ the Go^ 
'vernor of Cdzprf^^, and- Don Sancho de C^afiiUa, were 
Upon the Guard, his Majefty fent them Word they 
iboald take . Care ^of tbemfelves, for that he had re-? 
ceiy'd certain In/celUgence, that the Afb/^j would make 
a terrible Sally fijch a time, and therefore he had dif^ 
patch'd the Cpunt^'of Cabra and Unna^ with the Mar-^ 

Suefsof -^/<?)j5^,.tQXupport them in Cafe of Neceffity. 
^ be faid, 19 i% hjWpeh'd j .for the Moors, who were 
niptlels ^opcerA'd in the interrupting this Work, than 
the Chriftians were in perfeAing it, feeing them go 
on fo jjrofperoufly, march'd out of the Town doe 
Night in great (ilence> with agoo Foot and 600a 
Horfe to fecure, tljeir Retreat, and climbing up the 
Kiountatn, pour'd down at Day-break ott Qon Ro-^ 
Jt(fgQ and Don Hn^tado deMcndpz^, who did not ex-., 
pe^ them, tho* they had been adyejtix'd of their : 
coming j and who, without the timely Affiftance of . 
the (governor and Don Sanchoy who both cameiata 
?^if Aid,: h^d.bcep affure^ly <« tQ^..pieJ5Q%. Thefq 

Book I of Gu2man d^ Al&cachc.^ f^ 

httj whom the Moors beliey'd to have had a greater 
Number with them than they had^ becaufe they camo 
from behind the Mountain and made a great SboWj 
coming in freib^ reftor'd the Battle a little^ and gave 
time to Don Rodrigo and AlenJot^'s Men to take 
Breatl^i Nevertheleis thcMoors^ who had been fome-' 
what put to a Aand> feeing thele Succours not fq 
confiderable as they at firft imagin'd^ and being wil* 
ling to end this Matter at a Blow^ fmce to. faij( 
an Opportunity was ofFer'd them^ prels'd oa ia 
fuch manner^ that the Chriftians had been but rudely 
dealt by^ had not their Kine come feafbnablv to their 
Relief. He had no fooner been inform'd ot this At- 
tack^ and that Don Rodrigo was wounded^ but he 
could not be withheld from flying to his Aififtancej 
for mounting immediately on Hone-back with all his 
brave Men^ he came juft in the nick as the Chriftians 
were about to run. It was then the Couraee and 
Conduft of this brave Prince appear d^ for he not 
only fought like a General, but ventured his Perfon 
like a Private' Soldier ; infomuph, that there was nor 
one about him but would have willingly died in his 
Service, fo much the Perfonal Valour oi their King 
hadanimated and exalted them. Now were noble Feats 
of Amis to befeen, io many Moors and Chriftians fight?* 
ing like fo many Lions j but as the latter were re^ 
liev'd from time to time by frcfli Troops, the former 
were at laft forc'd to give Groimd. They had, 'tk 
tnie, a Detachment fent them from the Town to Uh 
vour their Retreat ; but the Chriftians, animated hf 
the Prefence of their King, pufli'd them fo vigOr 
roufly, that, notwithftading their Reinforcement, 
they were obliged to take a dired Highti The Cfari- 
ftians purfuing them with incredible iFury, not only 
made vaft havock among them^ but like wife entered 
with them Pell-mell into the Suburbs of J&i^i^i, whicfji, 
tho* a Place of Defence, had no- time to fbut i^s 
GateSf Here they got great Bo^ty, Wiid t9oft abu«%- 




dtnce bf Prifoners. The King, confidering whither 
tfcheir Fury had carcrcd them, caus'd a Retreat to be 
founded, and at the ftme time ^omnrmndcd a confide- 
rabld Body of Troops to move towards them, to pre- 
vent their being cut off by. a freih Sally from the 
Town, which they 'Tied moft certainly been, had not 
the Governor fouftd his Garifoh too weak for that 
purpde. Oft- die contrary) he judg'd it Pruaence 
fiot tcf expofe ' tlie -Town to the fame Accident that 
hiid befellen the Suburbs, and therefore contented 
himfelf with firing from the Walls on thofe Troops; 
thjt they might not make a Lodgment. He ^Ifo 
ihew'd, upon this Occafion, that the Glory and Ser- 
vice c^f his Kitig and Country was dearer to him than 
his own Blood ; for when it was told him, his 
DiiBgHtev had a little before gone to the Suburbs, and 
hat twas to be fear d fhe was taken by the Chriftians, 
lis Anfwer ^as, tie had rather hp Daifghter fljould he ta- 
keny than a Fcrtrtffy Ti^hlcb the tCing his Ma^er had con- 
jidtd io binfy he Ufi, and fo would not fufFer the Gates 
to be open d for any Body to go to her Relief. She 
^as indeed among the number of the Prifonei?, but 
'twas her good ^Fortune to fall into the Hands of d 
Vpung Nobleman, one Don Alonfo de Zumga^ to 
whom fee was rather a Miftrefs than a , Pnfoner. 
He -was about i8 or 19 Years of Age, and this was^ 
ttie jfirfi Ca|iipaigiV he had made. He was beauti- 
ful in Perfbn, and aimable in Temper, and, in a 
•Word, was as compleat i Gentleman as the Catho- 
Tick ^outt had tred for A longj. While. He was full 
t>f Glory, ind being greatly dieeirfd by his Prince, 
cook Care to deferve it on all OccaRons where there 
ivfts the greateii Danger, efpecially in this, #here he 
^entei'd the Suburbs Mriththe'foremoft of the Troops,* 
-And cut down all hi met, till he arrivM at i Houfe; 
•#hich feem'd. altogether built for' Pleafure> Snd 
'Which, indeed, belong'd to ffie Gdverribr'. He was 
•iefolvVi to ktto*r what it W»^^ and: therefore -iiiiifirie- 
• marelf 

Bookf. 0/ 6u2mati d*Altothe. pj- 

diately commanded his Soldiefs to force open' the! 
Doors, which they foori did with Battle-Axes. At 
their Entrance they found 10 or 12 Men ready. 
' to difpute the Pafs with them, but '8 of thfcm beiAg. 
laid on their Bdcks, the reft fled and fay*d themfelves 
over the Walls of the Garden. This Houfe was ex- 
ceeding fplendidly furnifh'd, and the Soldiers fell im- 
mediately to plundering it^ but Don Alonfo, who had 
no odier Aim than Glory, contented himfelf with 
running about with his Sword in his Hand, to fee if- 
he coiild find any Body to refift him, but met with 
no Body. At length, coming to an Appartment that 
by the Richnefs'of its Furniture feem'd the moft* 
confiderable in the Houfe, he found one Door fliut,- 
vvhich, commanding y or 6 of his Followers to break 
down, they met with fome Difficulty, it being barri-- 
cado'd behind. This gave Don Alonfo reafon to fup-^ 
pok fomebody was retir d thither j but, upon forcing. 
his way, he found nobody. Penetrating farther, 
even to the inmoft Room, and going sibout to breal^ 
down ahother Ddorthat was tikevvife1ock*d, he heard 
from within a gredt Skriek, as of Women. Entrin^^ 
he faw five, whereof four fell trembling on their 
Knees, all bath'd in Tears, and beg'd their Lives j 
while the Fifth, who by her Habit and MajefHck 
Mien, fecm'd Miftrefs of the reft, flood firm, wicK 
her Back againft a Window, and a Ponyard in her 
Hand. Her Countenance was fierce ana bold, tho' 
pale and wan ; and upon Alonfo s approaching her^ 
fte told him in good Cafiillian^ fli^wing him the Poh- . 
yard, that 'twas with that fhe would guard her Ho- 
nour "againft any one that Ihculd be fo infolent as 
to touch ^ her. Don Jkhfo^ who had hitherto fete 
none of thofe Paffions that young people of his^ Agj^ 
are wont to have.for Womer^, found .'neyerthelefs lie 
could not always efcape thfem, but fboher or later he 
Ihould be drawgi 'iijtQ *the cbmrR&n Siiare witK^t'^ 

relt <>f Mainkihdr He^had; 'tis^true; lltbgether* re- 


$6 The Ufe anJ ASHms Patct 

Icrv^d himlelf till now for the Glory of Arms j but, 
upon the Sight of this lovely Moar^ could no longef 
keep to his Refblution. He iio fopner caft his Eyes 
upon her^ who was indeed one of the moft beauti- 
ful Ladies of the Kingdom of Granaday , biit he felt 
his fieart wdunded in aU the Pliices where it was vul- 
lierable. He inunediately pull'd off his Helmet, and 

8ut up his* Sword, when approaching her with all the 
Lefped and Mildnefs imaginable, he told her, *Twas 
jlot for fuch charming Ladies as fhe to apprehend any 
Violence from one who had made Glory and Honour 
his Profeffion ; that he was extreamly concern d he 
had invaded her l^rivacies, but at the fame time, 
Cottld not but believe his good Fortune had condu&ed 
him to her Appartment^ to (ecure her from all future 
Outrages ; he beg'd her therefore to make ufe of this 
Opportunity, and not to ftay till the Fury of the Sol- 
diers, who hardly diftinguiA any Body upon thefe 
Occafions, might put it out of his tower to do her 
thdt Service he defir'd. This faid, he proffer d her 
his Hand to condpA her out of the Houfe, and at the 
fame time order'd his Followers to take Care of the 
other Women, And let them carry away with them 
whatever they thought proper for their Ladies ufe- 
Daraxa, for fb was this beautiful Moat^, who was 
Daughter to the Governor* cslird, being Itill under 
Concern for the Danger file had been exposed to, 
tvas not eafily got out of it, till at length, lookinjg ud, 
and feeing noming in her young Officer that mignt 
ocpafion her Difquiec, llie began to t^ke Courage, 
ftnd efteem her lelf not a little happy in falling into 
his Hands. Neverthelefs, when flie refledred pn her 
becoming Captive fo the Enemy of^ her Law, fixe 
could not refrain from Tears; infomuch, that not be- 
ing able to infwer the generous Proffers of her Ca- 
rrier any otherwlfe, (he only gave him her Hand,- 
and fufferd him to lead her wtiitfiier he pleased. X^od 
Almfo, moy'd by the Tears of lus fek moner, did 

;: V 

Bcx>k L tf Guzman d'Alfarachc ^7 

all he could to comfort her, and Ihe, truly fenfible of 
hisavilities, made what Acknowledgments Ihe couldj 
but that rather by Geftures than Words. 

As he was about to lead her out of the Room^ 
News was brought the King had caus'd a Retreat to 
be founded^ which oblig'd him Immediately to tako 
Horfc. He gave his own Steed to his fair Captive ; 
and going to help her up, foon found flie had no 
Occafion for any Affiftance of that kind. He quick- 
ly difcover'd ihe underilood the Manage as well a$ 
any Body j for her Father, who was perhaps one of 
die iinefi Horfemen in all the Kingdom of Cranada^ 
had taken Care to have her inftru(5ted betimes in 
that Art j and her Genius lying much that way, ic 
was not diflBcult for him to bring his Defign about,, 
for {he took that fort of Learning as f aft as it was 
given her> and in time became an abfolute Horfe- 
womap. Don Jlmfo having gather'd together as 
many of his Soldiers as he could,(for you muft imagine 
they were not a little intent upon Plunder^) he drew 
them up into a fmall Body ^ and having planted his 
Beautiful Mooty and her four Women^ m the midft 
of them, marched* at the Head of them towards th© 
King's Army, which then began to be in Motion* 

The King, who, weary 'd with the Fatigue of the 
Bay, had retir'd to (bme neighbouring Shades to re- 
frefli himfelf, was jufl about to remount, when New* 
came that Don Monfo was bringing the Governour s. 
Daughter Prifoner to prefent to him. His Majefljr 
began to Laugh, and was more than ordinary den- 
tous of feeing fo fine a Sight, being greatly de- 
lighted with fuch fort of Gallantries. Don Atonfa 
appibaching, and perceiving a great i-mmber of the 
beft Quality gather'd together, did not doubt but 
his Majeily was ^imong them ^ wherefore alighting, 
and defiring thfe fair Moor to do the like, he took 
her by the Hand^ and condu<9:ed her into the Kin|;*$ 
Prefence. His Majefly, not a little furpriz'd to lee 

' H fo 

4Z\ 'the Life imi ABi&K^ 'O f Mt t' 

fo beautiful a Lady, arofc^ and went fome few Steps 
t0 meet her; when flie, who knew well what Refpe<9: 
was due to a Sovereign, wonld prefently have fal-' 
len on her Knees^ buc the King would .not fuflFer 
her. ^^ My Lord^ faid Ihe, I could heartily have 
'^ wifh'd for a lefs difaftrous Occafion to have (klu- 
^y ted your Majefty, but Fate has order'd it other- 
^^ wife^ and I am oblig'd for this Happihefe to the* 
^ greateft Misfortune that could befal mc King* 
teydlnand^ who was a Prince of a great deal of 
Wit, and, when he pleas'd, a great de^ of good' 
Humour, (Jid all he could to Comfort her, telling 
her, he could forgivie her calling the firft'day of her 
becoming a Prifoner, a Misfortune; biit faid, he 
did not queftion but fhe would find her felf fo well 
treated and entertained- for the fu^ure^^' that fhe would 
have no manner of Occafion to . account her lelf 
Unfortunate. His Majefty then took Horfe co re- 
turn to the Camp, after having^ bid ' Don Monfi 
(fmiling) take care of his fair Prilbner, and wiit on 
her to the Army, where he faid he* would have a 
Tent .provided for her and her Women ; and after a 
Kttle time fend her to the Queen, by whom file 
fliould be cherifti'd as fhe delerv'd. , ' ' 

^ Being arriv'd at the Camp, which Was but a little 
diftant, the King gave Daraxa leave ' to . write to 
her Father, and defir'd her to affure him from him, 
that fhe (hould be treated with all the Refpe<9: due 
to her Birth and Quality. Thofe Officers thatfirftfaw 
this beautiful Moovy having cry'dher up for a Wonder, 
It excited the Curiofity of others to fee her likdwife,. 
among whom many were not contentfed with a bare 
View; fo that Don ^/(w/if's Tent, whither fiie was 
at fii^ conduced, became fb crowded, that he was 
very uneafie at it, if not apprehenfive of a Rival^ 
which made him Vow that no Body (hould fee her 
for the future, no not" his dearefl: Friends. This 
occafionM him * aba:ndiince • of Importunity, which 

""^ . never- 


kt of Guzman d'AIfaracbeJ .^51 

neverthelcfi he dcliver'd himielf from, next morning^ 
betimes^ before any of the Officers Were ftinring, 
by condu&ing his fair Captire to Jaen^ where he 
J>releilted her to the Queen by the King's Orders. 
Her Majefly had been inform'd of her coming by a 
Courier from the King^ andtherefore was prepar'd to 
receive her with all the Kih(tecfs imaginable, as well 
in reipe^ to her Birth, being, as &e underftood, 
deicended from the Kings of Granada, as in regard 
to her Perfbnal Merit, and odier good Quahties. 
The King had recommended her to her as a Prifoneif 
of Confequence, tod ihe found her to be fuch, be^ 
lieving by her m^tosthe Governor might be wroilghc 
upon to lurrender the City j and fo Ihe wrote to the 
Kii^, but his Majefty acquainted her fhe knew noe 
die Chsrz&tv of the Man, for Nature would noe 
be able to prevail upon him, where his Duty came 
in Qaeftioh. 

The Queen, who was at firft fight extrearitly de-I^ 
ligjhted with this charming Moor, whofe Eyes, iho 
faid, Q>arkled like fo many Diamonds, was yet mora 
raviih'd when Ihe came to Tafte of her Converfa-* 
tion ; for her Wit was the Source of that Fire and 
BriBant that topear'd in her -Eyes, and which hei 
Majefty foon fuffidently esperienc'd In the meaii 
time, Don Alonfo having perform'd his Commiffion, 
and being oblig'd to return to the Army, begin to 
be Icnfible, that Love, like all Things elfe, had its 
wrong ^nd its right fide, and that nothing . perma« 
nent was to be expeded fnwn that God, who, wheni- 
ever he did a Eavour, made us paly through the Nofe 
for'c* He experienced that this Deity begto widi 
Charms and Delights, but always ended with Grie£ 
and Tears. He knew not hitherto what Love wa^ 
and was fo pleas'd with that little he had fck of it> 
that he could wiffi it might have for efer faflbed^ 
but he foon recovered from his Error, when he fduna 

he was to\\part..widi his. b4ov'd JfeM**- ^ ^^^ 
. ; H2 a« 

w The Lifednd ARim ^ Parti. 

jiQt yet -undergone any Agonies and Uneafinefies 
that: belong to that Pkffion^ and was not a litde 
furpriz'd when he found himfelf all of a fudden 
feiz*d with them. Thde attacked him the Night 
bcfofe he was to go to the Army. He could not be- 
lieve, that Love could fo fuddenly reduce him to 
&ch a Condition^ or that his AiFedion had tnadie fo 
gteat.a Progrefs as to occalion him 'the Lcrfs of his 
Quiet, by being to lofe the fight of his amiable 
Miftrefs. -But what moil afflifted him was, tha: he 

- had not yet difcover'd his Pailton to his lovely 
Chprmer. Jt was not but he had had Opportunities 
enough, and thofe as favourable as could be wifii'd ; 
but whether he wanted Courage, which. the braveft 
in Lovfircafes fbmetimes want, or, whether he was 
too: ihuch a Novice in this Art, he never thought 
fit. to e^^plain his Sentiments by Words, but left 
them to be altogether guefs^d at by his A<^ons» 
Nevertheleft, as he had read a great many Romances, 
and learn'd from them that Lovers were to {peak, * 
and thereby difcover their Thoughts to their Mi^ 
ftreffes^. he fear d Daraxa might haVe an > ill Opi- 
nion of him if he left her without fo doing, ThereU 
fbre he refolv'd to acquit himfelf of this Duty, and 
(pent all the Night in contriving after what man- 
ner he fliould do it. . He confidfered all Ways, and 
hardly any would pleafe him ; till at length finding 
no other Remedy, and the Sun beginning to peep 
in upon him, he was fain to abandon himfelf entirely 
to Love, that his Deity might inlprre him upon this 
emergent Qccafion with what was moft proper to 
move a Miftrefs, whom no Body could dote^ upon 
more Paffiohately and. Sincerely than he did. This 
being xefblv'd on, :he gets up and dreffes himfelf, 
andgo^sti^ the Queen to receive her: Majefty's laft 
Comniands, and at the fame time begs Permiflion 
.to cake. I:^ave of the beautiful Mcor. -TJie Queen 

. was Isnfible, a.youogLwd, like Don^^^4fej/d, could 

i* li not 

0/ Guzman d'Alfarache. roV 

not be two Hours alone with a young Lady * like 
Daraxa without Love's playing his Part: Neverthelefi, 
having a mind torally^ me told him^ nothing was 
. more reafonable than what he demanded ^ but iince 
the young Lady was under her Charge, if he had a 
mind to lay any thing to her, it muft be in her Pre- 
fence. This embarawd Don JJonfo more than before, 
for now he faw plainly his Meafures were broken, 
yet did not defpair, but refolv'd to bring the Mat- 
ter about one way or other. The Queen having 
fent for Daraxaj Ihe no Iboner appeared but her Ma- 
jefty began to (mile, faying to her. See here. Daugh- 
ter, (for lb Ihe began to call her) a young Lord, that 
is more to be pitiea, and more a Prifbner, than thou 
art. He can't depart, nor go for the Army, till he has 
taken his final Leave of thee. I am his Friend, corf 
tinu'd the Queen, and know well he will not make 
a Miftery of his PafEon to me, therefore defire what 
he favs to thee may be in my Hearing. This Dit 
courfe made the pretty Aioor blufli j fhe had obferv'd, 
indeed, in the Countenance and Ai9:ions of Don Jlm^ 
fo fbmething more than ordinary,* but never thought 
it amounted to Love. Befides, fhe was fo taken up with 
the Thoughts of her Misfortunes, that ftie had no Time 
to reflet on any thing elfe ; and what Kindnefs flie 
was oblig'd to that young Lord for, flie believ d was 
more owing tp his generous Commiferation of her 
Condition, than any AfFedion he had to her Perfon. 
Her Heart was already prepoffefs'd in favour of ano- 
ther, therefore flie could make no Returns, in cafe 
Don jilonfo did love her ; however, flie thought her 
felf oblig'd to make a Reply to the Queen, and con- 
fequently told her Majefty, flie was extreamly en- 
gaged to that yoimg Nobleman, in cafe he had any 
Relped for ner, and fliould not eafily forget the 
Obligation; but as it was not in her Power to make 
any farther Acknowledgment, flie hop'd he would be 
•contented with her praying for him, 9nd wifliing him 

H 3 no 

102 . The Uft and ABimd . Parti 

90 wclrfe Fortune than ihe had had^ providing it (hould 
be. his ill hap to be taken Prifoner as flie was. The 
Queen made no Anfwer, on purpofe to give Don A- 
fe»fi opportunity to fpeak ; who, tho' he had natural- 
ly a great deal of Courage, and was known to make 
fluick Repartees on all Occafions, was, neverthelefi, 
iomething at a ftand here, either becaufe he felt too 
violent Emotions of Love, or was afraid to deliver 
himfelf too freely in the Queen's PVefence. He 
therefore contented himfelf to reply only to the fair 
paraxai That whatever Miihaps could befell him, he 
ihould always think himfelf happy to bear the Cha- 
rader of her Champion, and which was an Honour 
fee intended to ask before he left her. The Queen 
I'eplied, That was an Honour was leldom or never 
xefus'd ; and having a mind to keep up the Conven- 
(ktion and Intereft her felf for Don Jlmfo^ as much 
as poffible, flie added. And I believe Daraxa v^ill be 
able to give no Reafon for refufing it. J would glad- 
ly to be fure. Madam, replied Daraxa ^ have fo great 
an Honour as Don Aionjo for my Champion j but if 
the Laws of Arms are the fame among Chriftians 
as with us, I can't fee how I can accept of one in that 
Poft, who is concern'd in a prefent War againfl: my 
King, my Father, and my Country. What you lay 
feems to have fome weight in it, anfwer'd the Queen, 
but this is a particular Cafe, and you may certainly 
ihew Refped to one Perfon, tho' your Enemy, with- 
out injuring your whole Country ; and as for the King 
and your Father, they need not in fuch Cafe be or- 
fcnded at it. Dpn Jmfo thought himfelf extrcamly 
oblig'd to the Queen for fpeaking fb eameftly in his 
behalf, and whilft he was about to make his Acknow- 
ledgments, her Majefty went on, and faid, Tho' Da- 
raxa fhould only engage him by this Favour to ufe 
the Moors^ that might be taken Prifonersj more kind- 
ly, that would be a fufficient Recompence for the 
luppw'd Injury, &e might do her Coyntry by it x but 


.BoakI xf 'Guzman d^Alfarache. ^ 1 03 

Iheiaidy ihe bellev'd Iq ingenious a young Lady could 
have no Realbns to induce her to a Thing that moSt 
iieed$ be for her Advantagq^ and that her ieeming to 
be fo much againfi: it^ was only out of pure Modefty. 
She added^ if ihe lay under any further Difficulties 
or Scruples^ that hinder d iier from complying widi 
this realbnable Requeit of Don Alonfo\ the bare Q- 
bligations ihe had to that young Lord, were moj^e 
than a fufiicient Excufe for her. 

What Reafons foever D^r^x^ might have, not to 
' yield to thofe of the Queen, Ihe thought ic more ad- 
vifable to be iilent^ than periift in them^ fmce Silence 
might imply her Confent to what was defir'd of her. 
But as this was not enough of it felf^ the Queeq^ 
who had a mind to finiih the Matter^ told the Moorijfi 
Lady, It was a Cuftom among Chriftians, that when 
any Woman took a Man for her Champion^ fhe 
muft give him fome Token or otfaer of her good 
Will, which was commonly a Scarf, her Pidure, a 
Handkerchief, a Ribbon, qx fome fuch-Uke Thing. 
This was likewife a Cuftom among the Mpinrs^ who 
were at that time a gallant People, and fcorn'd to 
yield in Matters of Gallantry to any Nation whatfo- 
ever. But Daraxa fear'd the Coniequences of this 
Civility, and therefore declined at firft the doing it ^ 
however, as the Deiires of the Queen muft now be 
Laws to her, ihe could not difpence with them, and 
confequently was oblig'd to give fomething or other. 
She thought a Ribbon would be the leaft fhe could 
give, therefore taking off a TilTue-Knot from h^r 
Head, Ihe made a Prelent of it to Don Ahnfo. That 
Lord receiv'd it with all the Ceremony that Lovers 
of that Time were wont to pay towards their Mi- 
ftrefTes, that is, with bended Knees; and kifling her 
Hand a t^oufaiud times, he fwore eternal Conftancy 
and Obedience to her Commands. The Queen, who 
was exceedingly pleas'd widi tl;iis Scene which fhe 
had brought about, told Doxi4/p»yf'>.there would fpee- 

H4 "^v dily 

5o4 The life affd AMioHs Parti. 

dily be espeded fuch Feats of Anns from him^ as 
could not but be the ProduAs of £0 great a Fairour 
fis he had received; to which he readily replied^ That 
if Fbrtune would but furniffa him with Opportunities^ 
it ihould be his Fault if he did not perfonn all that 
was required of him. Now perceiving it was time to 
be gone^ he humbly took his Leave of ^e Queen^ 
ftnd afterwards turning to the fair Mot^r^ beg'd ai her 
to remember him fometimes^ and fb went for the 


If* ever Prifoner had Reaibn to be pleas'd with 
Confinement^ Daraxa had^ fmce fhe could not have 
been fetter treated^ even at the Court of her 
own King^ than fhe was at this of their Catholick 
Majefiies^ where (he was look'd upon not as a Pri- 
fontTy but a Lady^ whom the Queen highly relped- 
ed. Over and above her charming Perion^ her Ma- 
jefty difcover'd in her a more charming Soul, with a 
Wit fo much to her liking, that fhe could not endure to 
be without hen She would frequently entertain her felf 
with her about Pditiques and State-Matters, of which 
ihe gave as good an Account, as if fhe had been bred 
to them as many Years as fhe was old, which were a- 
bout Eighteen. She, in a Word, took fb great a 
- Fancy to her, that altho' there was fbon after an In- 
terview between King Ferdinand and King Mahomet y 
Sirnam'd el Cbi^uite^ i. e. the Uttle^ and altho^ the 
Town of Ba%a had furrender'd, and, that one of the 
Articles was. That all the Prifoners fhould be reflor'd 
on both fides : notwithflanding all t^s, I fay, her 
Majefly had lo fix'd her Heart on the fair DaroKay 
that fhe could never prevail on her felf to part with 
her , but, CO fatisfy her Father, wrote to him with 
pf effing Inflances, that fhe mi^^t continue with her, 
undAe would do all for her, that fhe could for her own 
IJflughter. The Governor, tho* much griev'd for the lofs 
pf his Dear Darasa, yet, confidering what Advantage 
U mig^lP be to hsr t9 b9 Favourite (o &> nreap a Queen, 


IcI 1^ Gtknian d^AIfaracha io; 

gave his Confent^ the' with Regret^ and was con* 
tented ihe Ihould go whither Queen IfahBa pleas'd. 

The Campaign thus ended^ the King rcfblv^d to 
go and pais the Winter at Sevily and accordingly 
wrote to the Queen. The Couft was very numerous^ 
and fiever known to be more magnificeht. Don A^ 
hnfo had i^erform'd a World of fine Adions (ince the 
Prefent he had receiv'd^ and Was become more in 
JLove than ever. As he was one df the ricbeft Lords 
of the Courts he could befk afford Expence^ and 
therefore fpar'd nothing that might make his Equi^ 
page and Train fplendid. Nothing could be more 
ficn^ nothing more gallant. As for Daraxay he had 
ftill the fame valu^ for her^ tho* he heard or Rivals; 
nevertheleis^ underitood fhe gave them no £ncou< 
ragement. He founds at his Retum3 her Refpeft 
was hot in the leaft leffen'd for him^ but then it was 
not encreas'd^ for the fame cold Icy Heart remained 
ftill^ which was enough to chil even the mofl flaming 
Lover. This Advantage, however, he had over his 
Rivals, That he bore the glorious Charafter of her 
Champion, and had the Tiiiue*Ribbon waving in his 
Hat, giving himfelf the Title of the Cbamtim to the 
fair Moor. But all this fignified little^ fince like them 
he was treated with the iame Indifference. He had 
only greater Liberty to fee and converfe^with his Mi- 
ftrefsj and 'twas to the Queen heow'd thatHappinefi, 
who, thinking to retain D^r^A?^ the furer at her Court, 
had a mind to make her a Chriftian, and marry her. 
She thought Don jiUnfo the moft advantagious Match 
for her, and that made her look the more favourably 
on him. She alfb believed nothing could work fb great 
a Change in her as Love, therefore fhe did all fiie 
could to promote that. She only wonder d at one 
Thing J that whereas other Afo^ri^ Ladies were more 
than ordinarily fubje^^ to that Paflion, Daraxa was 
very little fenfibleof it, notwithflanding themany Ad- 

(ire^es were made to her by almoft aU the young lords 


:iDt^ rb! Ufe ami ASidn^ .Eattl 

.of che Couit. M ibr Religion^ ihe often took occi- 
fion to Difcoarie her on that He^d^ bat cohld not 

f find (he was )Ret diipos'd to exchange hers for a bet- 
ter; d^refore tihe left that Affair to He^Vea^ and 

^ contented her ielf for the prefect to give Ikx good 

* Advice^ and a good Example^ which ihe wa9 very 
capable of dorng^ as being a moil Pious and Wife 
Princeis. In the mean tirne^ as ihe knew the :Moors 
had more than ordinary . Jifisifd to their Habits 
which they made a part of their Religion^ ihe us'd 

.her beit Endeavours; to make her cjhange that for a 
Spanifh one^ hoping by that means to draw her infen* 
fibly on to the Salvation of her Soul, which was 

. what Ihe moft defird. In- order to this, ihe broke 
the Thing to her one Day,, and told her. She. would 
CKtreamly oblige her^ in Cafe ihe would comply, with 
her Requeil, for that ihe had a mind to fee what an 

: Alteration a Spanifh Habit would caufe in her Beauty. 
Daraxa had long defir d wha( the Queen proposed to 
her, notwithiianding the Injun^onsof her Religion 
to the contrary j therefore was not backward to com- 
ply with her Majefty, but rather ov^rjoy'cj thajc fuch a 
Thing had been offered her. Accordingly ihe imme- 
diately confeflted, and Orders were given to the Wo- 
men to drefs her forthwith in the Spanifh Garh, but 
not to fay a Word of it to, any Body, becaufe the 
Queen would have the Pleafure of furprizing the 
Court, and the King himfolf. She appeacVl there 
with great Luftre and Magnificence ; her Dreis being 
one of the richeil that this Princeis had ever worn j 
and the Beauty and good Mien of Daraxa gave a 
fliining Addition toit. She was not long without be- 
ing diftinguifli'd. Her Charms made her remarked, 
in a particular manner, beyond all others ; and 
there were few but freely owh'd, ihe far excelled the 
xeil ; tho' among the Maid^ of Honour, and other 

.Court'Ladies, there were many perfedly beautiful. 
She was the p^pafipnof. a W^odd of Infidelities^ Mcd 

.. yet 


L \f Guzthan d^Alfirach& 167 

yet more Jealoufies j and her being but wo agrecabte 
to the Men^ rendered her almonodious to the Wo- 
men. TTiey found infinite Faults in her, and could 
by no Means agree to the merit of her Beauty. But 
what moft deeply touched them was^ the little Care 
they few flie took of her felf, and her Indifference 
for appearing handfbme ; tho' that be the reigning 
Paffion of Womankind. She almoft intirely neg- 
le^d Drefs and Ornaments j and it was only to 
pleafe the Queen^ that (he (ometimes took a litde 
Care of her lelf. This Princefs, who law fhe was 
cxtreamly thoughtful and melancholy, and was per- 
iwaded it was an eifeA of her fecret Grief, for being 
in a ftrange Country, and remote from her Friends. 
was of Opinion, that in giving her abundance or 
Ornaments, and variety of Drels, the dear Delight 
and Weaknefi of Women, (he might be diverted by 
it, and brought to take more Pieafure in herfelf: 
And in this Thought, the Queen was every Day heap- 
ing Prefents of Drefs and Ornaments upon her ; but 
it made no manner of Change in her. Sne drefi'd her 
lelf once or twice with what the Queen gave hen 
looking on her felf as oblig'd to do lb in Duty and 
Gratitude j but after that Ihe laid them by, and 
thought no more of them. Her Humour was alwavs the 
fame j a fort of languilhing j and 'twas perceiv d Ihd 
fought to be retir'd, and that nothing diverted her : 
Nay, the Queen was leveral times told, Ihe had beeii 
often fiirpriz'd in Tears. This Princels, who intirdy 
lov'd her, was much afflifted at it ; but with all her 
Endeavours to difcover the Realbn of it, Ihe was ne- 
ver able- to get it out of her j Ihe was however \x\ 
hopes, that Time, which is always the certain Cure 
of every Care, would at laft diflipate the Troubles of 
the beautiful Mooty in io ag;reeable a Court as that of 
Sfatn. But in the mean time, to contribute toward^ 
diverting the lovely Captive, and likewife to pleale 
and entertain, at the fame time^ fo many brave Offi« 


io8 TB^ Ufe and AMions PartL 

xers as then thronged the Cowt^ and had fb well be- 
hav'd themfelves during the Campaign ; the Queen 
propoies to the King^ ner Husband^ to permit a So- 
lemn Bull*fight^ and the Sports of 0^)^'$^ orCarioUf* 
fels and Turnements^ as in ibipe Places they call 'em« 
Ferdinand confents^ and the Queen prefently gave 
publick Notice of 'em at Courts that^uch as had a 
mind might prepare for 'em. 

The Grief and Melancholy of the lovely" Moor 
were of that fort^ that far f^om being leflen'd by 
Honours^ Pleafures and Di^rertifements^ they were 
augmented by 'em. She was in Love ; and with a 
Nobleman, altogether worthy of her ; from whom 
ihe had been forc'd away^ juji as the Preparations for 
their Marriage were in a manner cpmpleated. Fatal 
Reverie ! inftead of theHappineis fhe thou^t ib near. 
This Favourite Lover of hers, was a young Lord of 
Granada^ whofe M^rit and Valour had been diftin^ 

fuifli'd upon feveraj Qccafions ; who defcended from 
lings as well as fhe j and who, for the Perfections of 
his Perfon, as vyeil as for the Qualifications of his 
Mind,and the Excellence of his Wit, might vye with 
the moft accoimplifti'd in the Court of the King of 
Granada, They were acquainted from dieir very In- 
fancy ; and the Friendfliip between their Fathers, 
gave them frequent opportunities of Converfationj fo 
that this Love of theirs was not of a few Years only, 
but as old as their Reafon, and born with it* But 
when Daraxa was grown up to that Age and Stature> 
that requir'd a flrider Care over her Perfon and Con- 
dud, and forbids all eafy Accefs to her ; 'twas then 
that phefe two young Hearts begap to feel the firft 
vibrent ehmotions of Love, and to find the uqeaiinef^ 
of being depriv'd of the Pleafure of feeing what we 
mofl tenderly afFe<9:. But happily for our young Lo- 
vers, their Fathers,^ who continu d their old intimate 
Friendfliip, and were of Opinion^ that their Childrea 

could no where better match than with each other. 

* . -*■'••. ' ^ 


Bodk L of Gtizmin (i'AI£irach& 105^ 

reiblir'd to knit the Knot of their Amity more dofe 
and firm by this Alliance. The C6ntra& was made^ 
and the Time appointed for this agreeable Afimr : 
But it leems we make wrong Reck'nings^ when Ve 
compute without the Stars. Scarce was this fir& Cbr 
remony compleated, but Ferdinand takes a Refolution 
to befiege Baza. He took his Me^iires for the Siege 
with fuch Precaution and Diligence, that the Place > 
was inrefted before they in the leaft fiiq)eAed it at the 
MoQrifii Court ; fo that Ddraxai Father, who was Qo^ 
vemor of S^tca^ found himfelf fliut up with his 
Dau^ter in the Town, juft as he was fitting ail 
Thifl^ to celebrate this Marriage ; the gallant in- 
tended Bridegroom being almoft hourly expected 
from Granada J where he had prepared for it on his* 
part with a World of Magnificence. Ozminy for that- 
was the Name of Daraxa\ Lover, ftood in no need 
of Advifing, to know what was fit for him to do in 
this furprizing Conjundure. Love and Glory permit 
not the confulting any ; they,thofe noble Incitements: 
of young and gaUant Minds, pulh him- on to get into 
Baza ; and he had fiown into it, if he could. He 
puts himfelf at the Head of aoo Hoiife, who, for the 
greateft part,confifted of thofe Friends and Creatures 
that his Merit and Liberality daily gain'd.him ; who, 
refoWng to foHow his Fortune, were xxverjoy d they 
could auo at the fame time acquire Giory^ and ferv& 
their Prince, in throwiti^ themielves into JS^is^. They 
met with two leveral Parties in two Hours march, 
^d intirely defeated both j but not without Lofs tod 
on their (ide, divers of them being kilFd and wounded.. 
A diird Party that felK upon them within half a 
League of the befieg'd Town^ they found too ftrong 
for Men who had already fuftaind two Attacks diac 
had been vigorous enough. This lail Party confifted 
of 600 Men, who inftantly furrounding them, caH'd 
to. them to yield themfelves, and they (hould have 
Quarter. But Ozmin^ underftanding not that fort of 
. . . . Lah- 


% loi Tbt life tmi JMimi Pact L 

IjanffiWy widiout lofing his Courage or Judgment, 
form d his Men into one Squadron^ placing his 
Wounded, being x f in number, in the Center, ha« 
ving loft lo others, who, in the two preceding Ren- 
counters, had been kiU'd upon the Spot. In tms Po^ 
fhire he march'd dicedly up to the Enemies, and ^n* 
gag'd them ; and for an Hour, in ipite of the ine- 
quality of Numbers, .Vi<%ory feem'd in doubt on which 
Mt to (ktermine; fi> valiantly the Adoorsy atumated 
by the brare Example of their gallant Leader, main« 
taih'd the Fight,, like Men refolv'd to die or conquer. 
The iflue of the Adicm was ftill doubtful, aad tho* 
many of the Moors were flain, yet there woe far 
rhore kill'd on the. fide of the Cbrifiians ; of whom 
the greater part were difabled, and the jreft fb difbr- 
der d and broke> as to be afanoft ready for flighty had 
not a new Reinforcement of 200 Men come in to their 
Relief. Thde were all frefh Mtn ; fo that Ozmin, 
who was dangeroufly wounded in three feveral Places, 
fcmnd himfeff conilrain'd to endeavour to preierve 
the reft of his Men, by retreating in the bdl manner 
he could. He did accordingly retreat; but in fb 
good order, and with fo bola and frequent Stands, 
that the Cbrifiians thought not fit to puriue them far. 
He got back to Gtunaia with 1 10 men ; of whcxn, 
only 12 were not wounded. This Skirmim was coun- 
ted one of the moft brisk and vigorous AAions ^t 
happened during the continuance of the Siege of Ba^ 
xa ; and the J^ame of Ozmin^ which was already 
known among the Cbrifiiansy became more fimious 
than ever. 

Being got to Granaday his Wounds confin'd him to 
his Bed ; upon which. King Mabomety to whom he 
was related, would needs do him the Honour t)f a 
Vifit, after. an Adion fo full of Glory. But What 
gave him the greateft Joy, was a Letter he received 
from his Dear Daraxa ^ wherein flie told him. That 
the Wounds be. had received, ;nore Xenfibly afteAed 

*% her 

B&ok£ (f Cumxind*Alf:Sauhe. fit- 

hfer than the Qlory he had acquir'd • that flic ralued 
the Hero in him much/ but the Lov6rmorej and ' 
that file therefore prayed him to be a. little lefs zealous 
for acquiring Reputation at fo great Hazard ; and ' 
defir d him to fpare for the future, ^ that could be, 
the effiifion of hife -Blood* She lent him with this * 
Letter a large embroidered Haadkerchief, after the 
Afe^i^manner, of her own Work j and this wa^the' 
firft Favour, of its kind^ that,fhe had hitherto done* 
Kni . . ' " ■ ^ '-' ' ' ' ' . 

' 6z,ff^ffs Wounds were too gjf eat to give way to 
the im^tient ardour of his Love, J^romptirrg him to* 
make a fecond Attiempt to get into Saza^ and to fuc- 
ceed in it, or die in the Endeavout, for he could 
know no Mfedium in this Cafe; h? niuft needs be^ 
either with his I)car Daraxa^ or eff^'iiemuft fink Into' 
the Grave in a languifhmg Detain - The Governor 
of Baxufy intended Father-in-Law of the amorous'^ 
Osirwiw,' having Notice of his Defign to make aTd- 
cond Attempt, dilcpiirag'd him from endoavounnj 
to force his Way ; as being too full of Danger, anc 
impoffible to fucgeed, the Paffes being on iall fides 
fhut up, and the Cbriftians too numerous, and too' 
ftricSfcly on their Guards to ^ve amy hopes of getting 
thro' :'He advis'd him rather todifguize himfelf in a 
C/&r/j?fi«i Habit, and to fet out upon sj fix'd Day agreed 
on between themyjuft as it grew- dark; that lo the' 
next Morningy about break of Day, he might get 
wttbip a quarter of a League of- jB^ss^r into whidi he; 
naight from thence' throw himfelf under the fhelter of a* 
Sally, that fhouia then be made on. purpofe to favour 
his getting in.' ^The Governoi: fent him thefe Adr 
vices by one of his Dpmefticks, wHofe Nam^ vvas- Or-^ 
*vjW(?3 who had feejti t^ Years a Pfifoner amon^ the 
Cbrijtuinsi zn^; %^ that time, had made himfelf fo 
much Mafter of their Language, Mannersand Cultonjs. 
that any Body -Would have taken him for a natural 
Sfanfarat He was aMb pcxfcidHy well acquainted with th< 
. n Roads 

Tii The lift onJAltiMs , Part L 

Roads and Situation of the Country ; he was iharp 
and cunning, even to Trick and Subtilty / and was 
befide all this an excellent Horfeman. Oz>min having 
maturely weighed the Governor of Bax^s Advice, 
dnd beginning to recover his Health and Vigour^ and 
to be in a Condidon fit to put it in execution^ his 
Father fpoke of it to the King^ who highly approv'd 
on't,well knowing the Importance of having areribn 
of Ozmifis Valour in the Town. 

This Lover, feeing his Defign fupported by the 
Royal Approbation^ would no longer defer his (etting 
out with Orviedo^ when once the Day was come that 
the Governor had appointed him. But tho'they were 
both of them extreamly well mounted, and tho' 
they rode all Night long without making any ftop^ 
they were oblig'd to take fo many by-ways to a- 
void the Spantfh Parties, and guarded PaUes^ that 
notwithftanding all their diligence, the Day began 
to appear while they wanted yet near a League of 
Baz>a. They were got into a Wood, the better to 
prevent difcovery ; but ftill as they advanced, they 
law the Cbrifiian Troops fo very much in Motion, 
that they could not imagine what (hould be the Mat^ 
ter. It was juft the very Day of the Sally that I have 
already mentioned, and Eerdinand being gone to the 
Affiftance of his Men, and a Rumour running thro' 
the Troops that he was in danger, the whole Army 
march'd to fuccour and difengaee him ; fo that the 
more our Adventurers advanced, the greater Noife 
they heard from all thefe various Motions* They 
faw, thro' the Trees, the Duft rifing on all fides, 
by which they eafily eonjedur'd there was Ibme great 
DcCign in agitarion, if not fbme inftant confiderable 
AAion. They then began to be apprehenfiVe, left 
they fhouldprecipitate themfelvesinto lome inextrica- 
ble. Difficulty, mould they quit the Ihelter of the 
Wood wherein they were covered, as they nxuft ne- 
ceflarily do, for paffing into a&odber that lay about 

• k * 

*% aquar- 

Bool^ L j/ Guzman cTAlfarache. i j 3 

a qciarter of a League diftant, and couch'd upon the 
Rendezvous made themby the "Governor, for throw- 
ing themlelves from thence into the Town. But the 
Oovemor had not foreleen, that his Contrivance 
ihould be difcOVer'd, that the Cbrifiians would be £0 
exceeding diligent to fuccour and fupport their fin- 
gag'd Men, nor that Ox,min fhould meet with'fo 
many Obftacles as he aftually found ia his: way. 
Orvied^^ as a Mian enur d and forni'd to War^ was of 
Opinion, that Oz^min ftiould advance no farther .,• but 
that he ftiould rather permit himlelf to go aldnel on 
Foot, to enquire a little into the . Pofture and Difpo- 
fition of Things; and even to try, if hB-couhl, to 
gee into the Place^ and acq^uaint the Governor *wher« 
Ozjhin ftay'd, that fo he might be fafely gbt'into*the 
Town. Ozmhy who knew nim Co be a Man of good 
Senfe and Experience, and who, indeed, faw plainly 
there was no better Courfe to be taken, was content 
to acquiefce in that Advice; and they :agreed^«oge»- 
ther, that if Omjiedo did t)Oit return within two Hours, 
that fhould fervefor a Token that he was gotfkfe into 
the Place, and that all things were ready to get in 
Ozmin alfo. Orvledo being departed, the Time grew 
tedious to the longing Lover; but fo foon as heJ coiild 
reafbnably guefs that the two Hours weie pafs'd, 
and Orviedo not return'd> he became impatient of ex- 
pecting any longer : fo taking the dtreA Road, both 
as nearefl and lefs liable to Sufpicions, he got wichin 
a 'quarter of a Leajgue of Baic,a without, any iU 
Chance ; when, on a fuddaih, he^faw a great -Nuni* 
ber.of Mooti defcending the Mountain in nmch dif» 
order^ and like Men that fled. This fei^riz'd him 
cxtreamly : He immedialtely four d his Horfe up to^ 
wards them to inform himfelf^ not knowing: but ic 
might be a Sally ordered by the Governor in hi? Ea-^ 
vour, but h^ narrowly nufs'd being kill'd by them ^ 
for the' they were Moors^ as Well as he, yet theyifir^ 
upon ham, .believing him a SfaniaYd,.h^X5a^iboi^hi% 

i j^da* 

1 14 The Life mtd ASlions Part 1 

Andaluftan Habit- By good Fortune, an Officer who 
was at the Head of this Body, and was known by 
Oz;miny hearing himfelf call'd by his Name, prefent- 
ly knew him by his Voice, and made a Sign to his 
Men to forbear firing. This Officer was fiypriE'd at 
the Sight of Ozminy but told him in a few Words 
what had happen'd j that the whole ChriOtimt Army 
had fallen upon two or three thouiand of the Gan- 
' fon, who had made a Sally, and had cut off moft of 
them; andpurfuingthereit to the Suburb^ had en^M 
it Pell-mell with them, totheNqmberof about Three 
Thoufand Cbrifiiam^ and had poiTefs'd themfelves of it : 
That King Ferdinand was but a quarter of a League 
off with the main Body of his Army ; and that there 
was no Thoughts of getting into the Pl&cc, it being 
icertain Death or Captivity to attempt it. 0%mi^, 
affliiSted to Extremity at * this ill News, faw plainly, 
that as Matters flood, diere was nothing to be dooe 
hut to return to Granadat ; nor was there any Security 
for even fo much as fiaying any longer there. He 
therefore rallied what he couid of thefe £:atter'd 
Troq)s, and making up a Body of about ;oo Men^ he 
retreated by the w^ that he came, more overcome 
with Grief^than the fir ft time, tho'he had now no 
manner of Wound ; but his. Trouble rofe fron the 
Mortification of having been fo very near Bax^, and 
yet not able to get into it * 

. Tliis News much alarm'd the Court of the Mnrifb 
King, tho' his Men had upon this Occafionbehavd 
themfebnes with all poffime YaJiour : And tjio' the 
CbriJHxm had! dearly boi^t the Advantage that their 
Numbers had procur'd them over the M$m ; diere 
being ilain, ^fyocially atitrft]^ and at RfdisnsHsfsxxym^ 
inp;, abundance of Men of Ouality ; but ftiii the 
King of Crsnadoi juAly refldi^ed, that after §j ereat 
Fatiguei^^ the Gariibn 6f necoffity nowihg we^, it 
was nM pofSblc for the Place to hcrtd out much lon- 
ger j fo thar in Truth hisr Uneafiaeft was but too 



L of Guztxtan d'Alfarache. 1 1 $ 

well grounded^ fince Baza being taken, there would 
be no confiderable Town able to endure a Siege left 
him, except only the City of Oranaduy the Metropo- 
lis of his Kingdom, and his laft Refuge. 

All the AHmriJh Court following the King's Exam- 
ple, was fiU'd with Grief ; but that of Ozmin went 
beyond all imagination. Defpair mingled with his 
Sorrow ^ and there was no Hopes he could poffibly 
furvivc it, unlefs, come what would, he made a 
third Attempt to throw himfelf into Bazut. Soon 
after his Return to Granaday there came News, That 
the CbrifHans feeing themfelves expos'd in the Suburbs 
to all the Fire of the City, had abandoned it. This 
News c^ntirm'd him in his Refolution to try his Fate 
once, more j and he was determined to eo the fame 
way that he went with Oruiedo. But juu as he was 
ready to mount his Horfe, comes Oruiedo to Granada 
with Difp'atches from the Governor for the King, 
and with a particular Letter for Oxmin. His Joy was 
cxtream at the Sight of Orvkdo; but it lafted no lon- 
ger than till he had read the Governor's Letter j by 
which he was made acquainted with the Misfortune 
had befallen his Daughter. It would be difficult e- 
nough to cxprefs the dreadful Agony of the wretched 
(hmhty at this terrible and amazing News. At firflt 
he ftood as fix'd and motionleis as a Marble Statue, 
bccaufe the Blow had aftonifh'd and overwhelm^ 
him J but having a little recovered his Spirits, his Soul 
became agitatea, with all the Exceffes of Rage and 
Fury, that the mofk violent Paffions are able to in- 
fpirc. He fufFer'd under Tempefts of Sighs, Heart- 
wounding Sobs, and traniporting Agonies, that mel- 
ted all th^t faw him into the mon relenting Ten- 
dernefs, and gave a general Fear that his Life was in 
Danger. Nor indeed could he long refift the une- 
qual Force of fo violent a Grief. His Body, taking 
neither Refl nor Nutriment, was fbon reduced (6 low, 
as to put it out of his Power, either to ajflSia or la- 

. i I z ment 

i}6 The Life an J ASlion^ Part L 

ment himfclf. A Feaver feiz'd him; his Strength left 
him ; and from violent Agitations of raging Tran- 
tporcs, he became fo weak and languifhing, that^ his 
Death was alniofl: hourly expedEed. The JPhyfitians 
had given him over^ and all his Family were now in 
the utmoft Afflidion for him | when Love, that 
ml^ghty Worker of amazing Miracles, a Doctor more 
Learned and Succefsful than a whole College, elpe- 
cially in Diforders occafion'd by himfelf, happily 
fuggefted to him a Thought mofi proper to refcore 
him to his Health, and recall the former Peace anci 
Quiet of his Mind. He revolv'd this Expedient fb 
continually in his Mind and Heart, and long'd fo 
much to make it fucceed, that he became at Ijft firm- 
ly perfwaded he could certainly and cafily make it 
do. From that Moment he began to recover j and 
the ardour of his Defires, and ftrength of his Belief, 
in a Ihort time rettor'cl him to his perfcd Health. 
In fine, he no fooner found himfelf fit to fit his 
Horfe, but he imparts his Defign tp Ome^/o j whofq 
Service would be lifeful to him, and who had never 
ftir'd from him during his Indifpofitioa! . Bazji had 
been furrender'd^ aiid there was certain Advice, 
ThztFerdinand (by a finenefs of his wonted Politicks, 
the fmooth difguife of his Defigns for the enfiiing 
Campaign) was gone to pafs the Winter at Sevil 
with the Queen. . Every ^.Body knew at Granada^ 
^hat Daraxa was highly in tayour with this Princels j 
a"nd therefore Oz^min was certain Ihe waited at Court. 
Upon this Refle(5tion, he.rcfolv'd that he and OrvUJo, 
covering themlelves under the appearance of J)nda- 
hfian Gentlemerf, would go to Sevil ^ where, in the 
confus'd medley there rmaft need^ be, and both of 
them fpeaking Spanijhyli.e concluded reafonably e- 
rtough, that it would be difficulty to difcovei?' 
they were Moors^ and very improbable they fliould be in 
the leaft regarded* OwieJoy who was naturally of 

an enterp^-izmg Temper, and never ftuck at Dimcul- 

.... , • 

* nes> 

Book I. (f Guzman d'Alfarachc* 1 1 7 

ties, agreed in our Lover's Sentiments_, equally from 
Jnclination and Complaifance. Their Diiguife of 
Cbrifiian Habits were ready j they chofe two of the 
beft Steeds in Oz,mins Stables, who was a Man ex- 
treamly nice and curious in Horfes, and taking with 
them good Store of Gold and Jewels, (of which this 
Lover was in no want ) as a principal part of their 
Equipage^ they fet out from Granada one fair inviting 
Night, without taking leave of any Body, and took 
the way of the beautiful Plain leading directly to 5e- 
wL They expe<fted to meet with variety of Acci- 
dents, in pafling through fo many Places where the 
Cbrifiian Troops were polled ; but, by good Fortune, 
they met not with the leaft. interruption till the next 
Day at Noon, that within a League of Loxa^ they 
were unluckily fpied by the Grand Provoft of the 
Cbriftian Army accompanied with his Guiirds. He 
was in purfiiit of fome Deferters, when on a fudden he 
iaivtwoHorlemen, who had not indeed very much the 
appearance of Defertionj but yet he thought them too 
well mounted for an Equipage,"^ that in all other re- 
fpeiSls ifeem'd plain and mean enough. He bid thern 
Itand and give the Wo|-d, and demanded an account 
M^hence they came, arid whither they were going. 
Ozjuniny whd, as well as Orvkdoy prefently faw how 
'twas, finding phey were all of a fudden furrounded 
by a dozen of thefe Rafcals, with their Carabines 
prefented to their Breafts, thought it Nonfence to 
caufe their certain Death by a vain Oftentation of 
unieafbnaHe Bravery : He therefore left it to Owiedo^ 
who was foremoft, to manage the Point. Orviedo told 
the Provoft, they were under the Marquifs of Jfior- 
^asy and were going to Sevll upon Bufinefs they had 
at Court. Upon which the Provoft required to fee 
their Furlo. On/iedo pretended to look for it, but 
not finding it, the Provoft refolv'd to carry them back 
to the Poft from whence they faid they came. Thac , 
Refblution of the Provoft, as you may very well 

I 3 g^^% 

1 1 2 The Ufe and A^ion$ Part L 

guefs^ was by ho means agreeable to OssiviiVs.Wifhesj; 
but he knew very well the true Secret to mollify the 
StifFnefs of thefe fort of Men. He drew from one of 
his Fingers a very fair Diamond Ring, and hand- 
fbmly letting its Beauty and Luftre fparkle in the 
Provoft's Eyes, I am certain. Sir, (aid he, addreffing 
himfclf to nim. You are too much a Man of Honour 
to make me mils the Opportunity of an Employment 
that I am going to follicit at Court. Pray let me 
prefent you with this Ring, and have your Leave tQ 
purfue our Journey. The Provoft had inftantly hisi 
Eyes upon the Diamond, and underftanding weU the 
value of it, he was egually furpriz'd and Charmed 
with fo generous a Prelent. He was now full of Ex* 
cufes fpr having hinder'd their Journey, and pour'd 
out a profuHon of Civilities that Oz^min could well 
have abated him ; and by a further excels of Coair 
pliment, he would needs goard them to Lckka with hi$ 
Men. Oz^tn did all he could to prevent it, but 'twa$ 
impoffible j the over-civil Provoft would needs con- 
vince fp generous a Gendeman, that he knew when 
he was oblig'd, and that he was no ungrateful Peribn. 
When they came in Sight of Loxa^ the Provoft re- 
doubled the Offers of his Service, and Oz^min bis Re- 
turn of Thanks. At laft they made an end of their 
Compliments, to the great Satisfadion of the Mmsy 
to whom the Company of thefe Beafts of Prey was 
difagreable enough; and they got at laft thus in fafety 
from them. Tlus was the only Rencounter that our 
two Adventurers met with in their way to 5wi/j 
where being arriv'd, they judg'd it proper, for Rea- 
fons ea(y to be guefs'd, to take up their Lodgings in 
the Suburbs that lys beyond the Krvtr GuaJal^uiwr^ as 
the mpft retlr'd, private, and quiet part of the Town ; 
but every Comer was lb crowded, fo thronged with 
Quality and Equipage, that even in that commonly 
neglecSfced Quarter, they had much ado to get any 
tolerable Accommodation. It was juft at the very nick 



Book I. cf Guzman d^Alfarache. 1 1^ 

of Time, when the Court was moft intent upon the 
Preparations for the approaching Feftival ana Com- 
bat of Bulls ; fa very near it^ that it wanted but a 
Week to it ; and generally the whole City of Seruil 
was employed in the magnificent Preparatives that 
were making for it, both for Ladies and Gentlemen. 
Oar Mmts were no iboner arriv'd, but they were in- 
formed of all the News, by means of the Domeflicks 
of ictreral Court-Lords, with whom their Inn was 
iiil'd, as were indeed all the reft of the Inns in the 
Town. There was no Talk but upon the fubjcd: of 
this Feaft j and as Servants are commonly better in- 
form'd in publick Chat and Rumours than their 
Matters, or at leaft they talk of Things among them- 
felres with greater liberty, Ozmin in fbme Places, 
and Orvitdo in others, by giving attentive Ear to thefe 
Difcourfes, eafily and quickly made themfekes Ma- 
tters of all Things of any moment, relating either to 
the Court or the City. Ozmin^ for his Share, learn'd 
more than he wifliMtoknow, or more,* however, than 
agreed with the quiet of his Mind. He had before 
made Orviedo often relate to him', the manner of his 
Mittrefi^s being taken Prifoner by the Chrifiians. 
This faithful Servant had attended her into the Su- 
burbs* whither, acainft every Bodies Judgment, flie 
would needs go, that (he might give that pregnant 
Proof of her eariieft Zeal to meet that Dear Lover, 
who, as Orviedo had told her, was every Moment ex- 
pecfted at Bax/t. Orukdo was in the very Garden 
wherein Daraxa v^sts repofmg her felf^ in expectation 
of the Arrival of her belov d Ozmin^ when Don A* 
lofifo had cau^d the Gardei^-Gates to be broke down; 
but thchi.-conftrain*d to give way to Numbers and 
fuperior Force^ he artfully (under the flielter of his 
Sfanifi Habit) found means to mingle himfelf atnong 
tne Throng of Cbriftian$^ and to pafi for one of the 
Gentlemen belonging to Don Almfo, whom he fol- 
l9w'4 even into the Jung's Pref^nce, when this Lord 

I 4 P^^- 

1 29 The Life and AHiom Part L 

prefentctf Daraxa to him ; after which,, he made a 
fliift to get back to Bazui ; where he gave an Account 
to the Governor^ her Father, of all that happen d. 
Oz^mlny but too well inftruded in all thefe Particu- 
lars, and efpecially in the too lively Defcription made 
him by Oryhdoy of the Perfon of Don Almfi^ and of 
his NotjJe, Generous and Refpedful Comportment 
towards Daraxa ^ who could not be infenfible of Co 
many Cjvilities from 9 (gentleman fo nobly Qualifi'd: 
Ozmjvy I fay, already poffefs'd with all thefe Ideas, 
which had made but too^muQh Impreffion upon his 
Hearty had no need of the further Inticements to 
Jealoufy and Defpair that he met with, in hearing by 
all thp Talk of the Gentlenien's ^qd Noblemen's Ser- 
vantsi where he lay, that this fame Don jlmfo ftiFd 
himlelf the knight of the IJeautiful Moor ; that he 
had alfo feveral other Rivals, but that this was re- 
puted to be moil in Daraxa s Favour ^ and that if flie 
t;u*rn d Chrifiiany as there feem'd fome likelihood, the 
Talk of the Court was, that he would marry her. 
This was enough to ruin the Repofe of a Lover, far 
lefs paffionate and nice than he. And indeed *iwas 
well for him, that he had with him fuch a Confident 
as Orvkdo J who yet, with all his Wit and Manage- 
ment, had much ado to keep him froip reUpfmg into 
thofc Rages and Paffions that had already brought him 
fo nea f the Grave. He ftrove to comfort and reaffure 
Him, by reprefenting the Love, the Vertue, the Fi- 
delity of his Miftreis, as impoffible tp be ftain d with 
fjich a Guilt ; but that it was out of her- Power, 
teautiful as jThe was, to hinder her felf from being 
betbv'd, fince none that law her but muft needs be 
touch'd by fo much Beauty. Thefe Remonftrances 
of Orzfhdoy in fome ibrt, mitigated the violent Agi- 
tations of this Lover's Mind, but they could not 
reach ' the Root. That which beft liip{3orted his 
Hopes, and gave him moft Strength to bear up under 
his l^nhappinefs, was his being at prefetit actually 
• -' * ' ' *' = • upon 

Book I ^ Guzmaa d'Alfarache. 121 

upon the Spot ; and that there now prcfented it felf 
the moft favourable Opportunity imaginable, forhim- 
felf to difcern and diftinguifh the Merit of his Rivals, 
and Daraxas Condud towards them; upon which, he 
might the better take his future Meafures, as Lov& 
and his juil Refentments ihould infpire and didate. 
Purfuant to thefe Thoughts, he would by no Means 
permit Oruiedo to let his Miftrefs know of his Arrival 
before the Feftival, that fo he might the better make 
his Obfervations. 

In the mean time, as he was a great Lover 'of thefe 
fort of Exercifes, and Combats With Bulls, whereof 
the Moors had been the firft Inventors ; and being one 
of the ftrongeft, and moft expert ^nd dexterous, of 
all the Gentlemen of his Time in thofe Valorous and 
a^Stive Sports, he would not lofe fo fair an . Occa- 
fion of (ignalizing himfelf in Prefence of fo Great 
9nd Flourifliing a Court as that of the^ir CathoUck Mar* 
jefties i but above all, in the Prefence of his Miftrefe, 
to make her fenfible of the juft Diftindion there 
ought to be made between him and his Rivals. He. 
enjoin'd Orviedo to. prepare forthwith all that was fit 
for their Appearance at thefe Combats and Entertain- 
ments ;. and as no Money was wanting, and Orviedo 
had Orders to fpare for no Coft, Workmen were 
eafily found, tho' all fo full of Bufimefs ; and rich and 
magnificent Equipages were compleatly ready for 
thetn before the' Sports began. 

The Day of the Solemnity at laft arriv'd. Never 
was there feen fuch a profufion of Magnificence, 
BLiches and Bravery, as was then exposed to publick 
View. ' Every Body exerted their height of Gallajpi-* 
try. Daraxaw^s^ perhaps, the only Perfon at Court,, 
and even of the City alfo, who was leaft concern d 
.^bout it. Nothing but an exprefs Comniand from, 
the Queen could nave prevailed with her to dreis a- 
bove her ufual manner ; and yet ftie did it with a re- 
markable Negligengei but her admirable Beauty w^^. 

r \. : '• ' ftill 

122 The Life ami ASiim FarcL 

ftill (b fliining^ as obfcur'd the Ladies that happened 
to be near hen All things were in order early in 
the Mornir^^j ridi Tapefiries^ and all manner of 
fme Embelliuments^ were plac'd to adorn the Streets 
through which their Majefties and the Court were to 

Efsto the great Fiazz^yhting the ufiial Place for theie 
id c£ Diverti&ments^ and which was then adora*d 
in the moft fumptuous manner. Their Catbolick Ma- 
lefties oune thither about three a Clock in the After- 
noon^ and feated themfelves in their own magnificent 
Balcoi^. Dsraxa was in another^ on the fide of the 
King^s^ accompanied with ieveral Ladies: divers 
Great Lords being aUb there^ fuch as had KHtnerly 
been a^ive in thofe vigorous Sports ; but npw^ be« 
caufe of their mere advanc d Age^ made no Preten* 
tions to the Honours of theie Combats, wherein all 
file young Isloblemen and Gentlemen of QuaUQr^ 
that had any Hopes or Dependance on the Courtj 
were forward to fhew themfelves. The Cafiat or 7«r- 
fMmenUy were to be divided into eight Bands on Squa* 
drons^ each confiding of twelve Cavaliers befides their 
Leader; making together 104 Horfe. Of theie Lea- 
ders, four were of the Number of Dsraxa s Lovers ; 
namely, Don Rodrigo de PadiSa^ Don jilonfodt Ztmigay 
Don Juan iVregmy and Don Diego'de Cafiroy all or 
them nandibme young Nobletnen, of very great Per- 
ibnal Accompliihments, and of difiinguiind Merit ; 
but the moft palBonate were the two firft. and to 
them'at length the other two gave up their Preten. 

The Sports began according to Cuftom, with the 
Gourie or Combat of Bulls : Tney turn'd one looie at 
firft, that was none of the fierceft ; and as every pnQ 
ftrove to ftrike firft, it was quickly flruck down. 
Our two MoGTs were already preient at the i?lace, but 
not yet brought within the open Square of the Spor^j 
they kept without, among many others that were alio 
pn Horfeback, to fee a little aft^r wha; manner the 


Book! <^ Gasman d'AIfarache. izj 

Cbrifiians manag'd theie Matters^ and what pafs'd 
within the JLi/^ before they went in. One may ea/ily 
believe, that the firft Endeavours of Ozjmin were to 
look out for his Miftrefej whona, without much 
Pains, he ibon diftinguifli'd from the reft, not¥^« 
ftanding her Sfanifi$ Garb. The Novelty of tMs 
Drefs lurpriz'd him, it not having been mentioned to 
him ; and this change in her Habit, which ieem'd to 
pref^e him ibme other of more fatal Coniequence^ 
gave him at firft a little difquiet of Mind. He be- 
held her a long time with great Attention ; and tho' 
he was at fome- diftance from her, he could plainly 
perceive flie was much alter'd, and that (he had not 
that livehr pleasant Air io very natural to her. Htt 
very Figure expre^'d a certain Sadne(s and Meian^ 
choly. Whoever confider'd her, would have been 
very apt to conclude ihe took not the leaft notice of 
any thing that pai^'d diere, fince flie did not to mudi 
as vouchfafe to caft her Eyes upon the Diverfions. 
Her Elbow was negligently lean'd upon the Balcony, 
and her Head upon her Hand j and (he let the ieve« 
ral Obje^ pa^ indifferently before her Eyes, nor 
diftindly viewing any, or^ indeed, rather considering 
none of them ^ tor her Mind was lb wholly taken up, 
that ihe thought of nothing lefs than what fhe might 
feem to look upon. Lovers let nothing be loft, and 
tho' all this might be varioufly itkerpreted, yet 0&- 
w/», thro' Ibme remains of Hope, willingly applied 
it to himielf, and deriv'd a (ecret Pleafure from it, 
that none but perfed Lovers, and thole too of the 
niceft and moft refin'd Tafts, are able to find out and 
reliftu All thefe Ideas, and the Sight of his Dear 
Daraxay lb fiilly employed him at his firft coming, 
that 'twas no Wonder he had little or no Share in the 
publick Pleafure of the firft Bull; which, indeed, 
was not very confiderable; for the Reafon I have told 
you. But upon turning out the lecond Bull, which 
was of a much greater Strength than the firft, the 


124 The Life ' and Aborts Part L 

Noife of the People drew him from his fix'd Atten- 
tion at Daraxas Balcony, as a Man is wak'd out of a 
deep Sleeps and- then looking round over all the 
Square, he faw they had to do with a Beaft, who, 
tho' it were none of the moft violent, yet made work 1 
enough for them all. In the mean time, the Crowd 
of thofe who were roimd about him, as well thofe 
on Horfeback, who were of the Attendants of the 
Gentlemen within the Llfisy as the Throng of thofe 
that mob'd it a Foot, were furpriz'd, that two 
Champions of their Appearance, in whom they faw 
fomething of Uncommon,and even of Foreign,but yet 
magnificently equip'd, and in good order, fhould re- 
main thus without the Lifis. Are they only come hi- 
ther (faid the Populace one to another) to fee the 
Courfes ? Dare they not engage ? Are they afraid of 
the Bulls ? And do they carry a Lance only to lend 
it to fomebody ? They talk'd after this rate, and 
made other Ralleries out aloud, as upon fuch Occa- 
fions the Mob commonly do, without fparing any 
Body. Oz,min and Owledo over-heard all this Prate 
without (aying one Word, nor did they ftir at all for 
that. They knew very well that there would be 
time enough for them to fhew what they were, and 
whether they deferv d thofe Reproaches. Ozmin was 
defirous to (ee an end of the Courfe and Combat of 
this fecond Bull, which had already difabled two of 
the Combatants. Only Don Alonfo had wounded 
him j but the Blow proceeding from an Arm of un- 
propbrtion'd Strength, tha Bull was but the more en- 
raged by if, and the Ki light was happy in nimbly a- 
voiding the Bulls return of Hoftility ; which miffing 
the Mafter, yet lit upon his Horfe, and laid him 
dead upon the Place. Don Rodrigo de PadiUa^ one of 
the ftrongeft of all the Champions, had the Ho- 
nour to be Vidor, and at la ft difpatch'd this fecond 


Bookl. (f Guzman d^Alfarache. 12$ 

As ioon as ever Oz^in had leen an end of this fe- ' 
cond Courfe^ and perceiv'd they were going to turn 
out the third Buil^ he gave a Signal to Orvhdo to 
march to the Bars of the Lifis^ - and defire their Ad- 
mif£on> which was granted as foon as ask'd ^ bottf 
Mailer and Man making too confiderable a Figure 
tor any fcruple to be made about their entring the 
U^Sy or having their Part in the Cmrfes. As till therf 
they had been among the Crowd_, they had been bur 
very little minded, except by thofe juft round about 
them, whofe Sport and Jeft they had been j but they 
were no Ibonej got within the Lifis^ when the Eyes 
of all the Spe<5tators were turn'd upon them, and 
there was a general Silence for a time, as if on pur- 
pofe to ionfider them, as well becaufe of feveral re- 
markable Singularities they had by the Noble Fa- 
ftion of thdr Appe^ance,as by their equally Courtly 
and Warlike Mien,'^and the Richnefs and Splendor of 
their Arms, and of their whole Equipage ,• and Ch>- 
wi» in pai-ticular, who juftly pals'd for the mofli 
graceful Horfeman among all the Mom^ and the moft 
expert in Horfemanfliip. Both their Faces were co- 
vered with a blue Crape, as defiring to remain cbn- 
ceard^ >yhich the rathtt excit^ tne Curiofity of 
knowing who th^y were. The Efquire bore his Ma^ 
fters Lance after a difierent manner from what wa^^ 
cuftomary in Sfain^ but befides that^ the Knight wore 
upon his left Arm, in the manner of a Military Scarf^ 
a large Handkerchief^ embroider d a la M&refjue j 
which was another diftindion quite different from 
the Gallantries, of the Sfunifii Vogue j from all which^ 
'twas guefs'd that either they were real Strangers, or 
had a Mind to be thought fo ; but not one of all the ; 
whole Affembly had the leafl: Sufpicion of their being 
Moinrs. Ferdinand was one of the firft wjio had his 
Eyes upon them : He made the Queen presently take 
notic^ of them, and both King and Queen took a 

great 4eal Qf Pkalure in feeing them, draw nearer, 

J for 


126 Tire Life aad ASions FaccL 

for they went on that fide 6f the Sjuarey whereby 
their Mafefties had the Satisfiidion ot riewing them 
more difnxi^y. All the Cavaliers^ within the Bar- 
rier, made a Lane to let them paTs th«>'5 and gratify 
at the £uQe time their own Curiofity in ob&ving 
them attentively. The King was pleas d to fay^ That 
he never law Men that fate meir Horfes widi a better 
Grace; but that^ in particular, the Mafter diicover d 
by his whole A^t and Mien, that he was certainly a 
Man of a very uncommon Merit Daraxa was the 
only Perlbn whom this Grand Feftival, by a counrary 
Effedij had made more fad and melancholy than (he 
had been hitherto obferv'd, and who would not have 
given her felf the trouble of heeding theie two 
new Comers, had it not been for the Marquiis of 
Tsiiiay Father of Don Roshigo, who, at Ins Age, far 
more . iadin'd to Courtfbip and Oomfdiment than 
his Son, having teaz'd and rallied the lovely Mo(»r 
upon die SubjeA of the gloomy muiing Humour, where- 
in (be feem'a buried in the midft of lo many aereeaUe 
Diveriions, obUg'd her at lail to mm her Head that way. 
She immediately found a fort of Emotion in ho* ielf 
at firft Sig^t of thefe two Cavaliers, tho' ihe fcarce 
knew why. She only perceiv'd in them another 
manner than that of the Spaniards, as to their fitting 
aod managing their Horfes, tho' the Difference was 
^not very great; andT her Curiofity augmenting 
. every Mom^it, fhecouldnotforbearaskingPonJLoi/jbr 
who they wete : He replied, he knew nothmg of 
them ; and that the King himfelf had inquired con- 
cerning ihemt, without being able to be informU 
They were come almoft over*againft her BalccHiy , 
when ihe chanc'd to caft her Eyes upon^hat Hand- 
kerchief that the Knight wore upon his Arm, which 
ihe had not till then bbferv'd, and which ihe could 
not behold without a cavitation of Heart ; v^ich in 
i^ne Moment infpir'd tier with a thoufand Thoughts. 
And yet,' qievortheleis, flie was ODt able to believe that 


I: L if GazmaD d* AI£irache. 127 

which £he really faw^ as well as Urongty fancied^ 
that it was the very fdf-^iame Handkerchief that ihe 
had knt to Ozmin upon his having been wounded^ 
and that it was that very dear Lover himfelf j but 
when be had made a full iund^ as he did^ juft before 
her Balcony, his Countenance, h^ Air^ his noble 
Mien, eveiy thing agreed to auure her, that it was 
moft certainly he hunfelf j and that tho' her Eyes 
niight poffibly miftalw, yet by Ae Tranfports of her 
Heart, fiie knew (he was not deceiv'd. She was juft 
ready to abandon her felf to the warmeft ExceiTes of. 
(o unlook'd-for Joy, when the third Bull, who fixmi 
his firft Saily had fiU'd all the i^chfifrt vfith dmadfiil 
Diforders^ came and diftorb'd the dtar Delights of 
fo a^greeable Momems, advandng on that fide the 
Sfi$are wfaeie Ozmm ftood, with bello wings, tfaat<^ 
themf^vets w^e fufficient to fill Hie Ear aid Heart 
with Dread and Horr<3«r/ This fierce Animal was of 
the Breed o£ Tariia ; nor came there threr a morefu^ 
nous Beaft from thence, tho' that part of Sfmn is 
very famous for them. There was no need to excite 
his Rtige by Provocations; he was furious eno^g^ 
wither i€« Nevertheids they continually provok'd 
him according to Cuftom, by throwing great Sticks 
and Cudgels at htm; but the Cavaliers cud not pitfeat 
them^ves hefoie him with die iame unaaunted 
daring Ydour as they had fhewn with the two others. 
They made thdr Atlacks with more Caution, and 
Bridle in Hand, as well Don Radrigoi^A Don Jhi^ 
fo, a$ ttxe reft ; when^ as I was faying^ all on a £idr 
den he takes a frisit crds the encWd S^nwrr^ as if te 
went on tmrpofe to look for Qz^oni, ^ who was then 
alone with Ormdo on that fide die JLifis^ and being 
wfaoily taken i^ with fo inchanting an Ob^ed, .as 
that tfif : tus lovdy DarBxa^ did not dream^jof his £i^ 
ger^ afldmiidi le& of his Defence.; but the loud Ouc- 
criesiof die JPeopk, and even of his Miftrefs.toq, 
and the, lumce poetentedliim at the iame time by^.ob- 


t£8 The life imd AUions PiartT. 

njtedoy prefently made him turn to his immediate 
Danger. He ihad but juft Time to turn himfelf about, 
when feeing the impetuous Beaft ready to rufli upon 
him^ the vaiiant Hero (animated by the Prefende of 
the bright Goddefs of his Vows, far mor&than by 
any confiderationfor the Monarcbs ofSpain^and all that 
fhining Court) difcerning with an admirable Prefence 
of Mind a fair Opportunity to give a Mafter^-ftroak, 
puihing his Horle with the utmoft Vigour, pafles his 
Lance with incredible Swiftnefi, Dexterity and 
Strength, between the Neck and Shoulder of the 
Bull, in fuch wbnderous matiner, as that, opening 
all tefore Him^ he drove the fktal Weapon quite thro' 
his whole Body, and nail'd htm to the Ground with 
it fo firm and mre, that the Bead no more ftir'd after 
the amazif^ Thruft, than if a Thunderbolt had 
ftruck him. Our noble Lover, having thusconquer'd 
this furious Beaft, to the Wcmder of all this great Af- 
fembly,throwinginto the middle of the Area the broken 
Remainder of his ViAorious Lance, and retiring by 
the fame way that he came, as filemly as he comld, 
withdrew himfelf. So Noble and Brave an A&ion, 
of a Man already given over for 'dead, excited fo 
much Admiration, not only in Ferdinand and Ifabella^ 
in whofe immediate Prdence the Thing was done, 
but in the whole Court, and all the People, thi^ no- 
thing was to be heard for a good long quarter of sin 
Hour, but Shouts of Joy and Acclamations ; and no- 
thing could be heard thrx>ugh all the Place, but 
long live the Knight with the Blue Scarf^ . the 
braveft Man of the Age. They ftiled him thu^, ' be^ 
:caufe of the 'blue Crape Scarf mat cover'd his Face, 
and was fallen d behind his Head with a great Kliiot 
of Ribbons of the fame Colour, bemg that of D^- 
raxa. As for her, whofe Heart had pais'd in an inftant 
-from one Extream to another, from an EioceGr gf 
Joy, to a dreadfbl Terror, (he had been fb donfotuv- 
•ded betweea both, that flie became^ quite infiniibk 


for certain Xfomen^ difcemiiiG; nothing ; ib. that tho 
dreadful Bull was actually dem| when at her coming 
to her&lf^ ihe expeded to find him sill tn Fury juft 
before her ; but bein^ undeceiv'd^ by tht irpeated 
Acclamations and Prai£bs in Honour of this dear Lo^ 
ver^ (for ihe now no lonp;er doubted that 'twas he) 
and expetSing to find hun Under her Balcony^ ihd 
was mightily furpriz'd that ihe was not able to ieei 
him whererer ihe look'd. She thereupon idquir'd^ 
with new Concern^ wh^t was become of him ; 
and the Noblemen dnd Ladies that. were ^bouther 
ihew'd her where he was^ already it a gpdd diilance 
from the Lifiiy followed by t Throng or People thki 
crowded to gaze upon him is an extxiidrdinary Mam 
FerJif$4nd feveral times decl^t'd^ that he had nereif 
feen a more Bold and Vigorous Thruftof a Laiice | 
and for fotne time there was fearer :any Talk hot of 
this brave Cavalier ; every Body making thdr Queflei 
at him, and the King and Queen, and ^11 the Goort^ 
expreffing a!greatDeii]^etoknowhim. i 

Nightiwas now coiner; which being the a[ 

time fiw: thfe Diverfiort of the Sforting Spearsy the 

whole enclos'd Square wa& forthwith lighted wlfli ah 

infinite nomber of lUmbtafh i aeter was there a finer 

lUumidatSon. * And now c&iie on the ^tiadr^losy of 

Squadrons of the Sport, With their Trdiiipets^ ^\Sb^ 

Kettle-Drums; foUow'd by the Pages ^d Foormeni 

and twelve Smtipfer^Mules, all loaded vtrith Bundldi of 

Reeds,; . fofin'd into Sponrtini Spears^ or Lanci^.\ 'The 

Knights ifaad itheir Lead-Hoaes for the. CoWJei,^ all 

mbft ntagmAoently addri^dwith Gapariliais of Vch 

vet, of ttie.Citfoiir of -the Standard of cachr Barid^ 

and.en&brddisrd Widh GfJd and Silvef • the Cbtt o% 

Arms of each Commander being a^^iop. Never Ix^as 

fo mud) Ei^has feen j for 'twas hot otily ^old ada 

Silver that glitier'd every where^ ^d wte^riwith fhd 

Bridles^ Saddte9, Houfinj^; Poftral#and ev£n:tl^ 

ineaiiift Qirts were md.^m. all dieir. E^^^ 

M|;esuwsre duck &t vndi ponecious Stoiiesy and 
>ewebjof . grrat Priitej^v weU as their Per&fis» There 
were-in all jlSd Horfe& Firfl: oiarch'd the Eijatpatge^ 
ledi)y die Quenies or Mafters of dieilqrfe of every 
Ohaer of a Souadroix. r. Thed \ camec die Hodes^ 
hereof i the firic i? c^ried at their fooeofoft Saddle^ 
bdWs/ the Arms mid Cie^ i£ die Faniify of each 
Kjfiig^t^ and at their hinder Saddie^bow were rhut^ 
Aeir ^ Device^) iR^ Motto V faited ib leadti Kmgfat s 
Fancy or bsdiinadon; and all this adoni d with 2£un^ 
dance of Ribbons, and with Gold, Silver^, and Silk 
Fringe. ' The odier Hories bad onl^r their ufiiaf Fur- 
siimrc, widi' Silver Belk^ ivherewidi ,they naade no 
(naUNoife. After die Hcufes^ came Footi^ 
ireriesihdiefasne order. Theymarch'diotmdih^¥RhoIe 
enclos'd riace fdr die S farts, v^ich thefinttrely 
fiird;, ahd then mmSh!d out fay a dilE&rtot.Gate 
from tftat they camevin at> to avoid ijcMahm and 
Xtforder. Tne j^4&j£^V^ Bands or Sqnitdronv then 
made their Entry in twoFiles^ eadi faaTin|; dieir 
h cfy cOiv e Leader at their Head. They had%nqicch'd 
diro'tbe Streets ia the iilm& oider, andithea made 
die Tcwr'of the Sqnsri, 2k dieir Equipages had done ; 
after which, they begao dieic C^t^ by two^andtwo, 
Z^ance tnHand^ but with>& much'Vi^or and Addrels, 
ivith ib good an Air^ and (6 agreeable an £xaiSk|iei% 
thar every Body was diarnt'cTwith it r lAidl it may 
ivett be iaid, Tnat poflSbly there is^- ao Piacaela tm 
mdiole WorU where th|$ Ettfercifeis fauneir^^xent, 
or wtiere there b mompcybAly acontnptilhdfC^ 
tiers for diefe TsSrmmmixy.CialxTmJi^ 
Tiltmra or fuftings than 'in. j<«dy^/&r,' and more 
e&edflily in 5evi/^ C#rW(«rtf, imd JSrH^ 
where /evfe Youths^ cf'&^orxo Yearsrtif ^AgCLjnay 
beiel^ fo ride and manage Hor&^ aiki Jiinrmem at 
full fpeed^ witl^o moch.dexmritjr and gnaatfalneis^ 
that one ^alValmofi tUpk^diey :«n^i:^ sohe :Piede 
widi the iiori^ or iia(l' ai^ dxat Trade. frd&Liiieir 

.*^^ Births : 

Births: Hiere's no Stranger that fees them^ butWhat'^ 
TBViSh'd with Admiratioij, 

The J^Mllos^ after hdving rtui four times in thii 
manner at the fotir Fronts of the Square, fetreateo" 
by the ferae Gate as their Equipslges j anci then re^ 
enter'dfcy thefirftGate in die feme OrdersKbefore, but 

Sports or Combats 12 agafhil 12 ; that is to lay^ ^a-i^ 
tiriSo againft ^adriUb^ or one Bind^ Troop or Squadron^ 
againft another. This had not iafted aboVc a quarter 
ot an Hour before two ot^ber Squadrons carte, one 
on each fide; Which, while thp fecond ieem^a t;o p^rti 
the firft began a new Sktrmift, fo jmuch more deJ 
UghttuI, fey how tiiuqh th^ number wafe ettcreas'd ^ 
and, nevertiieleis; the whole \v*S performed Mrtth fx^ 
much order and exaftnefs, that it hAd more tfee r^f 
femblance of jDai^cing than Fighting.' 

While ;8ffl this was doings OssW*^ ivho Wotiy rtpjj 
i<rfe one Moment of Time that h^ could pqi^bly 
employ to £fee His belov*d Datax^ 2lg^in> *nd to W 
(een by her, in A Seafon fo favourable tp him as that* 
tvas * no fooher was got .at Uberty, wjth Ortihio^ frpnj 
the Crowd of l*eople that' haa followed thjem; bu^ 
having f^ivisltely difarm'd himfelf, he came t^aisk af- 
gain immediately to the Place of Sports* and prefHrl^ 
thro* ch^ Throng, j^laced Hlmlelt at his Miftrfe^? 
Balcony. As he was now but indifl^^rentiy ;H|6iped!^ 
no BQay troubled themfelves to diftingiufh hitil, not^ 
withftaqding his noble Mien i nor could it bb dond 
an fuch a Time and Crowd as that, it leaft uiil^^ hip 
hAd bpen Very weH known, baraka^ one may ima* 
ginc^ had her Thoughts wholly inteiit Uffpn hini^ 
And tho'ihe' wap peifwaded he would moft certaipijr vtr 
turn , thither^ 4nd irt that Belief had oft^rt look'cl 
rouni} oii j^Very fide for hitn, Vet fiie W^s far toougji 
from gtic(5ng tfiat he was already got lb tety neat' 
her I faejutttfien^tnoltcliaimingwlcgay; ^^^ 

1 32 . The Ufiand AStim .Vitt I 

intermingled with abundance of rich Ribbons that 
Don Atonfo had fent her that very Day, as fhe was 
toying with it^ chanc'd to fli)) out of her Hand^ alid 
fell down juO; at the Feet of ^his Lover^ as he was 
then gazing upon her. He immediately took it up^ 
and this caus'd her to look at him with a little more 
Attention ^ upon which fhc plainly, with an extream 
Joy, diftinj^ih'd him, notwithitanding the Diiguize 
of his Habit ; but as ihe perceived that fonie of the 
By-ftanders near him, would needs ofiiciou0y oblige 
him to reftore the Nofegay to whom it belong d^ 
and that he, on Ids part, prepar'd to give th«tn very 
rough Returns, ihe call'd out to them that he ihould 
belet alone with it. and that the Nofegay was Eatllen into 
;ood Hands. . This pacified the Matter i and the 
, lappy Ozminy in quiet Poffeffion of fuch a Favour^ 
ty 'cl It by way of Gallantry in his Hat, fomethin^ in 
tne manner of a Plume of Feathers. DarAxa^ having 
thus got Sight of him again, mov'd not her Eyes one 
MojQient olr from him. was continually attentive on alt 
his Motions, and mightily delighted her felf with this 
Accident of the Nofegay, as perceiving how much 
it had pleas'd her Dear Lover* He no looner turn'd 
his Eyes upon her, but ihe began to make Signs to 
him, which is a filent Language v^ry compoon among 
the Mms^ and which the Spaniards have fincfe lea|m'd 
of them, as they likewiie did their Sports of Carroa- 
fth or Tumamemfy Military Dances, and aU the 
reft of their Oallarttries : Ozjmin replied to hier m the 
feme .manner, none obferving them, every Body Be- 
ing fb intent upon the Sports. Nor was there any 
likelihood that any Body ihould once imagine that 
the beautiful Moor^ with all her Difdain aad Inlenii- 
'bility, ihould have found, among the Throng of the 
Populace, an Objed worthy of her Heart ,- and yet 
*it prov*d ioy and what intirely took up her whole 
!Mmd. Little did ihe exped, that this FeiHValfEould 
.produce io happy Moments for her j but ihe had 
.'""'" * paid 

Bookl tf Guztiiati d'AIfarachei 133 

paid dear for them, by the Fright given her by the 
furious Bull j and yet flie had ftill more to fuffer, for 
Love kept further Troubles in ftore for her. She was 
not to begin to find it, till that after the Sports of the 
^adriUciy the laflr Bull was let loofe, which was to 
conclude the Sports and Feftival. There was pre- 
fently a very great Noife, Hurry and Diforder in the 
Squau j for this Creature was at leaf): as terrible as 
that which had been kill'd by Oz,mn. Fear and Ter- 
r^r be^an to feize again upon DarMa^ who knew 
her Lover to be of a Temper, fcoming tq retire like 
(b many others, but who would on the contrary, 
tho' on Foot, give Proof of his Valour and Addrels. 
She was already frozen by her Fears ; and looking 
upon him afier a manner that fufficiently fhew'd the 
difquiet of her Mind, fhe made Signs to him to get 
upon a Scaffold that was jufl by ; but whether he did 
not or would not underftand her, he flir'd not from 
his Place j at which, fhe fuffer'd an extremity of 
Dread. Don Rodrigo de VadiUa^ Don Juan de Cafiro, 
Don Jl(mfoy arid divers others, who had already fig- 
nali2'd themfelves on Horfeback, were alighted, re- 
folv*d in a youthful Emulation to fhew their Valour, 
and Dexterity witJj their Swords, and on Foot, But 
one of them, whom this furious Bead had made to 
tre the Temper of his Horns, was already carried out 
of the Field difabled, and half dead. This had fome- 
whait moderated the Ardour of the refl. This mighty 
and raging Creature was ^ot into the midfl of th? 
enclosed Area, roaring moff hideoufly, tearing up 
the Earth with his Feet, and looking fiercely round 
him, as if threatning all in the uncertainty on whom 
to vent his Rage. Don Aknf^^ who, at the hazard of 
his Life, was defirous of doing fome brave Exploit 
in the Prefence of Dar^xa^ took this Opportunity to 
get near her Balcony,' to be the more within her 
View. Jle' found there a Man all alone by'himfelf, 
WhQ fcefls'dtohini wholly !uncQn(;eEn'd, or.^tjea^ 

Iv 3 M 

$14 The l^e md Mimt .P4rtL 

did not appear to have any great F^ar of Ait Ball 
He beheld him with fome Accention ; and above all^ 
hp looi'd ny)ft earneftly uptfq (he Nofegay that he 
hsii in his Hat ; which^ by the Riboons inter-* 
fi)ei:s'd with the tloWers^ feem'dto him to b<J the very 
iame he had fenc but that (ame Day to tht lovely 
Moor\ for tho' it were now Night^jVet the Place 
was fb enligbtned with Multitades of BanAt»uxy Aat 
^t Wasi as briehc as Day; and the Ribbons were fo 
cafy to be diuingmfli'd by their Colours and by their 
Kichneis^ that it was fcarce poffible to be nit^ken 
In it. This furpri:i'd him extreamly^ and made hin^ 
adv^cd towards him to be the. more certain^ and ta| 

at left diftance what fcrt of Man it might be. 

found there wa$ no doubt but 'twas the fame 
^ofegav; and as to die Man> he ia^ he had a fierce* 
hefs in nis Afped^ but that elie^ frOm his Equipage^ 
he di4 not feemof a Rank muph better than the vulgar 
fjoTt. ife knew npt what Conftru6);ion to Qiak6 
pn'ty nor was able to comprehend how that NoJfegay 
could come into fuch Hands. At \a& growing im- 
t>atient about it^ and eager to inform himlelr^ cdm« 
ing up within five or fix Paces of him^ and l0okihg 
yery difconteneedly at him ; Friend^ iaid he to hitny 
Where had ypu that Nofegay ? Where \aA I it ? re* 
plied Ox;miny without any Concern, tho' he rightly 
gueis'd s^t die very Inftant^ what bitereft he that 
i(poke to him might have in it ; it came to itic frofH a 
good H^d, bi^^ I owe it to Fortune. I know ^eU 
enough from what Hand it came, replied Dob Jimfo^ 
beginning to grow a little warm, to fee hlmteif 
treated with no more Refped by fuch a fort bi Man; 
but be it by w;hat«tcr Qhtoce or other Thihg come 
to your Hands^ take the Pate to deliver it u^ ta me^ 
for it was no( made for you. You ^k a iittie too 
much, anfwer'd Ozm%^(m widi tht faoKi Qoldnd[s 
an4 Indifference. No ar^re of yokir difpUtingj/ i^ 

Poh .ir^y^^/ briskly imeiitupting bim^^ eitiier ^gtv/e 


Bodfl. i^<jaziiiaiid^Macach& %^% 

me the NOfegay qoickly^jorlfhallihtkiiiyottkjt^ 
whom you ha^e to do ^ith. I am fbiry^ ic^ioA 
OzMifty that we are not in a Place proper torl^ 
What do you mean by that i laid Don jibefp^ iffak 
interrupting him : I mean, anfi^ev'd Ozmln^ with a 
Voicetom^vhatmore rais'4,That any wiieteoat 6f thi 
Jungs Prefence^ fo far from givu^ jrou up: dul 
JN[(^tegay^ I would force from you diat luiot^if Rib^ 
bons you wear. It was the very fame Knot JXn^^^hai 
^iven DonJUnfiy when (he received hin\^belier 
Champioli^ and that Ozmin had formeily given to 
Paraxa ; ib that lie no fooner c^ft his Eye: uj>on it; 
but he kneW it again ; and therefore no loii^ar doubt^ 
ed but that this was one of his Rivals, and ocre of 
the nioft favour'd of them : He ftood inoieed of all . 
his Judgment and Moderation, to help t/b reScain tl^ 
impetuo&Y of his Traniport. . I>on Akmfo^ wbbfh 
Temper was hot leis violent, quite lofm^ all Pa;- 
tience, and np longer able to reflrsun his Paffioi^ 
^xng himielf menaced 1^ Juoh a fort of Man j In^ 
foicm, faid he to him, is it fit you ihould thus forget 
the Rd|)e^ due ix> a Perlbii of my Qtudity ? and at th6 
lame time, he tbruft amonp;- the Kibbons of his Kk)ie^ 
gay a Batoon that he^had in his Hand, being one of 
thoie that the Cavaliers make ufe of to provoke anUI 
irritate the Bulls; and he had bertainly carried off 
^o&gay Bnd. Hat togethef^ if he had had to do with 
a Man of kfs Vigour^. Nimfaleneis and Addref% than 
Oz0rin ; 4^hprfeizAng.the fiatdoh; lA^enbh'd it iimaiit* 
}y by main jForce out of hil.Hand. J>6n Jlmfd^ in 
fti? utmoft Rage at fudh an Affixmt in preience of 
}ii$ MiftidTs, am even before the King himfelf, wa$ 
po longer MaRio: of his Piflioh ;* but without any 
Regard %q thGj iPxefenQe of their Majefties. :or any 
fhing eUfe, drawing his Sword, he was deiperatdly 
throwing himfelf iUpoh a Man, who iftood pr^ar'd to 
receive ^ai, iifiarfierce undapwed mabnei;;^: wh^ the 
^lUI GtniVPA^^QD i^m^ and parted thQiQ dQ what.thev 

Tg^ / The life Mid ABioHs Part I 

could All the Misfortune fell upon Don Jhnfij 
Svho, by one To% was thrown five or fix Paces ofl^ 
and received a dangerous Wound in his Thigh. The 
Bead became more furious than ever^ at the ^ght of 
the Blood that flow'd from the Wound, and prepared 
for a fecond Attack^ which muft needs have been fatal to 
tlib young Gentleman. Mo Body flir'd to help hinv^ 
whatever the King (aid to them, becaufe 'twas in a 
Place wheiie 'twas difficult to get at the JBeaft, with* 
out htixtg fo Ihut up from all Help or Means of efca* 

Sing, as was a manifeft expofing the Life of any that 
lould be raih enough to attempt it. But Ozmin^ 
Whp yet had lefs Reaion than any to render him fuch 
Service^ aftej: what had pafs'd between them, by an 
excels of Generofity, worthy the gallant Courages; 
and noble Minds of the luiights of thofe Tidies^ 
without any Regard to their particular Quarrel, or 
to any other Re^on that might fet hinq^againft him^ 
^uns. upon this wild Creature the very Moment that 
he was coming at Don Aknfo^ and puihing him in a 
violent manner with the fame Batoon he Md taken 
from Pon Jhmfoy he . made the fierce Animal turn 
ihort upon him with greater Rage than ever; but the 
Moment he bent down his Heaa, to makd his Adver- 
fary repent of his Rafhnefs, Oz^in took his Aim {o 
well, and fo well knew the Metal and Temper of 
his Sword, that giving him a back Stroak with his 
whole Strength, and luckily hitting him on the join- 
ing of, the Head and Neck, he laid him dead upon 
the Spot^ Never was Aftonifbment equal to that of 
the whole Alfembly, atfo Terrible, and yetfo For- 
tunate a Smpak. What had been done by the un* 
kQown Knight of the Blue Scarf, was almoft nothing 
noW;^ compar d to what, was done by this. For he- 
fides the difadvantagd of a Man on Foot, the nicety 
of the Conjunfture^jthe fituation of the Place, the 
feeming inevitable Danger, pn all Hands, all con^ir'd 
t9 renoei? this iVdtion^more St^ininp; an^ more Glo- 

^* - rious; 

Book! «f Guizman d*Al£uRach& 1^7 

riouf ; and the Acclamations for if, wherewith the 
Feaft concluded^ were alfo of much longer conci^ 
nuance. But Ozmin^ not much touch'd at all theft 
Praifes and Acclamations, only fought to retire him^ 
felf as foon as poffible, to avoid the Curiofity of In-^ 
quirers^ and not to be conftrain-d to appear heioTt 
the King. The King indeed ask'd for him, but he 
was already difappear d, sind none could be found 
that knew him, or could give any Tidings of himC 
Neverthelels, as he had been oblervy to talk with 
Don Jl&nf$y and that their Converfkf ion, according 
to what could be difcern d of it, fecm'd to have been 
hot and angry, and to have proceeded fo far as to an 
abfolute Quarrel, and to be ready to Fight when the 
Bull came upon them, it waspreiumM that Dotijilmfi 
muft needs know him j but the whole Court was like- 
wife curious to be informed from whence their Quar- 
rel might arife. DoxiAlanfo was at that time in no 
Condition of giving any manner of Account ; his 
Wound was not mortal, but it was deep and dange- 
rous, and he had loft abundance of Blood. Their 
Catholick Mdjefties were concerned at (6 ill an Acci- 
dent, from the Love they had for this young Lord } 
and they had caus'd him to be carried into an Appart- 
nient near their Perfons, and order'd him to be at- 
tended by their own Surgeons, that fo their Majeftie) 
might be the more fecdre that all due Care was taken 
of him, and might have a continual Account how h 
went with him. 

I have been unwilling thus far to break the Order 
of my Stoiy j but I now thirik 'tis high time to tell 
you iome News of the paflionate Daraxa : I have al- 
ready defcrib'd her of a Charader too fenfible, as to 
all things relating to her dear-l6v*d Lover, for yoii 
not (o have told your felf, at leaft fome part of the 
Pain, the Diforder, and the almoft Defpair .jfhe felt, 
fls.well for the Quarrel fhe faw riftng between thefei 
two Rivals 4;lp9n her Aacoulic, ^s «la for (he Dan- 

^3g .' imjLtfemdMwks Hot I. 

get 40* irfaidh Oarivin exposed himfelf now the iecond 
time. She faadjQOt been able to dUtinguiBi their 
lirbde TaUc^ h^ flie had well underftood the |;reater 
pitft of ic^ and that their Qoarrel happen d upon oc- 
cafiOn of the Nc^gay. She was almoft upon the 
irer^ Point of opening the whole Matter to the 
King, to prevenf tfaeir coming to Extremities ; and 
tl%9ugh it tm& bare coft her Lover his Liberty^ yet 
iliU bb Imptiifoiniient would be a lefler Evil thanhis 
Peath* But the dreadful Fright the Bull gave her 
when (he iaw him coming on with fb much Fury^ 
imd perceived htm got fb near the gallant Rivals^ lb 
f orally fei2'd hbr^ mat Ae became not only Speech* 
h&y and thereby anable to apply to the Ki|^ but (he 
l^as almoft uttefly idepriv'd ofSenfe and Motion. She 
reitlain'd in this cruel Agony till the raging Beaft 
wa$ kilTd. What ihe hadfutter'd at the Attack of 
the ftrft BuU^ was nothinjg; in companion to the vio^ 
lent Agitations of her Spirits at the Tight of this; facn. 
cw](e^ i(i reality^ the Danger of Ch^^mm was far 
jgreaten The Example of Don Alonfi had fo terrify'd 
mA amaz'd her, that ibe was quite befide her lelE 
lufine^ at was together impoffible to purcfaale^ af 
a dearer Rate tftnm Che had done^ the iWeet Tran^ 
^rt$ of Jk^ that (he felt at the. ftrft for the arrival^ 
Mid at the fight of her Lover. But this is the; isomv 
^lott Ouftom of Love ; and after this manner it takes 
llPri(ie and Pkafure toTirannize over Hearts fuhjcft 
to its Empire^ driving 'em to continual Eittcemicies 
^f ftl VkboSj anii ahsoft every Moment* 

t>9Hm EknraJe Vad^a^ Daughter of D^si Ltivis^ aii4 
(he p^EticulJir Brjend of Dar^xay ^ms in the fame BaU 
«my witti her, and had feen the whole pf the Ad-;* 
venture of tif»^ Mbfegay. * As that Accident^ and the 
PSTpiute betweieii pm Jlmfo and that unkxiQWa ;Bert^ 
|bn^ hid happen'd jufl under 'em ; and that^ lat kaf^ 
they were the neareft to^ the- S|^ ; . the Qjwei^ 

fis !^|()«$ it»} a&impatlettt ^^my^ body to )imtL km 

k waiy guitkly inquired of thed} the Partfcolfm ^ 
it Daraxa, as moft concern'd, judg'd it moft pro# 
per to let her Friend fpeak^ and flie very innoceatly 
and freely related the whole Matter^ or fo much of 
ic^ as leaft^ as came within her Knowledge j which 
was^ that (he took it to be upon occaTion of a Noie^ 
gsy that Don Ahnfo had prefented to D^b^^ and 
wnieh, happening to £|li out of her Handj haid b^ 
taked up by that Man^ who had thought fie to grace 
tiimfelf^ by {facing it on his Hatv that Dm Almfo bei 
ing thereippon come thither^ and recolie&ing th^ 
Nofegay^ was podibly difgufted at it^ and went 
about to take it from him; but .chat ihe had not 
heard any of their Talk* The Queen was but hi^Jf 
f^cisfied with thi$ Account ; and Dm AUfifa, froo) 
whom it was hoped the reft might be known^ was no 
fooher it a conaition of receiving aVifit^ but ihe f^t 
the Marquis of Aftorgaf to him. The Marquis^ tho* 
in his declining Years^ was yet a Man of a ploafoht 
facetious Humour^ and would commonly Laugh ami 
Rally with the youog Lords. Well^ my Lora^ faid 
he to Dm Akfifo as he enter d his Chamb^^ What 
think you now^ you Knight without Fear^ oodGem^ 
isi% dieib hprn'd Animals^ that pitilefs and i^gantieli 
prf^oh fine Sparks as you^ who add fuch Nutti^lli 
to thteir Fraternity^ come and gore ypa unmercifully 
wheh you think leaft of it ? What GaUantdes ^ 
thda i You will allow me^ that thefe ane hoxk ioii^ 
vy ibrt of Beafts^ and that the fportiti^ with 'em i$ 
but ian odd kind of Diverfion. It is a long time^ mjff 
JlordM^<3^^> replied ,D(?if vlilc»»/i (hiiUngj fince)r(^ 
ha^e been able to give a better Account of th^ 
Thiqgs than I c4n. You fay true, replied the ^fe^f' 
q^s,' ttls indeed a long time fince, to Ay great Rei 
grec-^ Ralliry apait^ added he, fa a mudi graa 
nx Tctae^ will you not teU us who ^is KA^ht c^ 
^e During Sword is, who d^livorVI you freqi ^ 

dcfr 9n4 S^9i m Extremity « tHat y^ (9.^ y^^ ids 

•'• . For 

4 1 . • 1 1 » \ 

t4« The Life arid MUns ^artl; 

For one may truly fay, he faved your Life, and that 
not one of all the Hero's of our Court was enough 
your Friend to diipute that Honour with him ; and 
yet they lay, you were juft upon the point of play- 
ing at Cut-Throats with him, I know better than 
any body, anfwer'd Dm Alonfo, what he has' done for 
hie, and the little Caufe I had given him to (how 
me (b great an Inftance of his Generofity ; but all 
that I can fay more, added he, is only that I know 
him not j that I am lo charm'd with his Bravery, and 
with his whole Procedure with me, that I think he 
far tranfcends the higheft Pitch of Generofity, and 
that I (hall efteem my felf the molt unfortunate of 
^1 Men, unlefs I can one Day find an Opportunity 
to convince him of my Gratitude. The Marquis 
thereupon let him know, that he was fent on the 
Part of the Queen, who was defirous of knowing 
more of the Matter, than that which he had told 
him ; that they were already pretty nearly inftruded 
as to the fubjed of their Quarrel ; that Donna Elvira 
and the beautiful Afw had informed the Queen fo far j 
and that all the Court, and even the King himself, 
were in an extream Surprize, that there had pals'd, 
during the late folemn Sports, two fo extraorainary 
Anions as thofe they had feen i and that both of 'em 
had been done each by a feveral Man, ( for no body 
imagin d they had both been done by one and the 
fame Hand ) who had been both of 'em as carefiil to 
conceal themfelves, as commonly others are to ap- 
pear, and accept the Gloiy and Recompenfe fo juft- 
ly their Due; and above all, as to the latl of the two^ 
he was not fuppos'd to be a Man of any coniider- 
able Value. 'Tis true, faid Don Ahnfo, interrupting 
him, if we fonn our Judgment by Drefs and Habit^ 
B^ at firft I didy ahd 'twas therein I was tn^aken} 
but whoever fce is, he is a valiant Man. and I can 
tell you no more than what thofe Ladies (aw,for that's 
the Utq^oft I know of it. The Marquis gliding ha 

Book L 0/ i3a!uh2ti d^Alktichc. 14 1 

€Ould be no further inform'd^ took his Leave of the 
wounded young Lord, and return d to give the 
Queen an Account of what he had done. 'Twas bc-» 
lieved at Court, that there was (bmething of Myfte- 
iy in all this, and that it was by a reciprocal Gen6« 
rpfity that Don Ahnjo would no turther explain him- 
felf concerning this unknown Gentleman; but Daraxaj 
nevertbcleis, was.fuQ^eded to be fome way or othet 
privy to the Mattery and the Concern that had beert 
obierved in her, was afcribed to the Part Ihe took 
in the Misfortune of Dm Aknfo ; which was admit** 
ted to be reaibn^ble enough, he being her particular 
Kiiight, and one of the handfomefl: young Lords at 
Court, and who paffionately lov'd her. She cnjw'd 
in private the imdivided Pleafu^e <^ thk whole Hi-« 
ftoiy, that none knew better, nor but one fo well a^ 
ihe ;- but this Pieafure' was not without Inquietude; 
She had over-heaid iwhat. Ost^m had laid to Dm 
^liffifo about that Knot of Ribbonsibe had given himi: 
3he knew the particular Charader of her Lover^ and 
the general Temper of die Moors^ nice to an Excefi 
upon Occafions of this kind. She condeinii'd her ielf 
of Weaknefs, or of Imprudence at leaft, in not ha^ 
ving given to Dm Amfo almoft any thing, rather 
than what had been given her by fo dear a Handt 
She was* unable to comfort her felf runder the Senfii 
of this Fault, fmce her Lover would alwa3rs faav» 
grounds to reproach her with it, even tho' he IHouid 
be conyioc'd after what manner it was done ; and 
tho* he ihpuld be petfvi^aded, that there was not the 
leaft Imputation cpuld be juftly charged upon her. She 
was quite at a Lois how to retrieve her ietf &oitl 
the Mifchiefs confequent to this Error ; aiid ihe 
feh an inconceivable vAnguiih from her affiA&ig 
Thou^ts about ic She would faiti have writ to 
him.; but what poffibility of finding out a Man, 
wrhoie Bufinefs it was to conceal himfelf, efpecially 
In Stvily and amidft she Cx:owds and Confuiions that 


t4t ThlJfedmfABiMt tmt 

ibw filL'd it ? And who couldlhe make ufe of upon 
fMit ft Nicety ? Not one of her four Aitwrijh Women 
CQcdd fpcak Sp0mlh enough to mike an Inquiry ; and 
b((fidc$> they were no moite permitted to ftir out ot 
iSic Palace than ihe was. Her whole H6pes centered 
ar laft ilpon the Diligence her Lover himfelf would 
^kmhtlns everts to find out fome way of Intercourib 
between them; not but ike fprefaw^ ^enin thisj 
9lbwdmcc of Difficulty from the rery great conftraine 
'Undi'efenrednels obierv d in that Court in ail mannei* 
of Cofiveifadon ; tuit fiie rely'd upon the Love and 
ManMMieoe of Otmin. She pais*d ibme Days in 
thejk MdkI of mdaodioly Miifings : wfaidi^ in the 
tnidft of the Satisfiaftion (he took!, in knowing that 
h^ Lover tad faer ieif were both in the fame City^ 
tirere not warning ibmetimes to mi her Mind wiidi lb 
tm^ ; TrauUe and Impatience'for not hearing from 
h^y i» idmoft diftraaed her ; When at laft^ one E- 
Iratdiig^ fU ikit ' wasL walking in the Uf^r^Garden 
iKith fil00M£kdr§^ ctpeding the Return of the King^ 
11^ twsih. All the .Couict^ was gone a Hunting> fhe 
indt iwlth ivhtftdhe ib much wi&'d for, i&e deoi De* 
ti^t jof (ber £yes.and Heart. In all probaUliey you 
fcntow^ the fUAnaer of die Gardem of the PatiiGe of 
SMt^, and the* diflindion of ^he JD^per and Ixywer^ 
(Bttden. Tls :notliii^^ eUe but «wo Gardens^ one 
iMeritauMh^ after the A£n^ Falhion ; as is alio 
U» Pttlfice kidfy an Edifice of^didi^ : The Lowers* 
Cflr^Bttisi theJ^er^ and as to the I7pper> Which is 
fitMwtodv^pQfi: Jkcthesy and ranges even widi the 
tm Boofi it by jtopQrly ipeaking^ no more tikh an 
Attttk Serrtcfeiof Walks, Flowers and Gra&Plots. 
/Xheliicft yvas.only for Men, but yet fuch d& were be- 
ffMll^totHc^e^ the Piivilege cf^xfyig 

^inittediatD it, atid that too but at certain Tline? j 
^In die . £ Viiinngs, and when the King was |tf the 
Paihce: The t?pper-.Garden was referv'd for the 
jUdki^ef :the./Cottrt, who cattMi^Ollftiflliy to Walk 
II ''^ . tbare 

there in the Evenings, to ihew thamfelviss to die • 
Lords^ and fometimes evien to difcoode with then^ 
over the BaBu/lradty which rum quke along this iGar- 
den, and is ahbut Elhow high; fautthiftwasneVer 
doiie but when the King and Quyeeft were Abfent^ 
for in their Preience none but the hmgii^.ot 
Signs was fuffer'd. Gentlemen had the PhmSmcn of 
Sin^ng €here> even^ in Pre£bnce-^QC thek Majeflies^ 
provided it were fbme fine Voice, and that there was 
lomething hew and uncommon to the^Airffld Wcftds. 
There was alio at Times, fome little £ntertainoifint$ 
of loftramefttal Mufick in Concert^, faut ihsn it-nwft 
be always done by tho£b of the Gomi^ and but a few 
te a Time ; fbr noHiing would be fdSkr d then but 
what was nice an4 delicate to the utnio& J9Mn^ 
havinjl Jtbcn flipc away^m the Queeai, to divert 
her ;f3£it-whild in tbis^ Gajnden wim DvmaBhfnt^ 
they had icarce taken two Turns befbf« they heard a 
Man's VQi» fingingv It at fii&iiurpdz'a dMBna 
littl^^ b^omfe it was unuiual to let asjy Body^intsi 6» 
Lowra^Garden wheii the King wai not in itne Pklao^ 
butthe Voicerfefim^ to them to be'extceamly moring; 
They HKere .bodi at once <!^urion^ to jm> w \vdbo it 
was,tandtogetnearcrto.hear him ; Jbnt/bra:ig unwi:^ 
ling^ to he leen^ thi^ got behind 4ie OrangQ*^Tr6te 
tfaac grofw/aloQg idx; JSMH^jtJe^ and fide fofdy t)h titt 
they wiere jufi joTw-sagaioft the Stngen Tfacn tbttf 
choie;each a Tree, thro' ivhichv thqr au|^ £beiafi4 
hup at* JPleafure, without my fear of. oswg d^oci^ 
ver d. Jhma SivkM xboKgfat nim to bb :i QctttUunatt 
extreamly handfome, and of a noble Mien. As for 
iWisfif/i seed but ttdi you 'twas.hibr Dear Qzmin. 
He i^Osi Ikt A^ym rupon a Bank x£ Ttirf under a 
Covert «f agreablec Verdures ; and teasing hislfead 
agaiafl: a Tree in a fi^tigeot Po&in»^ foag jtbaf lot* 
lowing; Words mSftm^ : 


144 * the Ufe and A$tkns Vml 

Cruel ttkntkjs Jealoufy^ 

FreexMg EffeSi of hot Defre^ 
Wilt thou extinguijh thy Parental Fife, 
Tiercingmr Heart v>itb fiin^ngCrudty^ 

Akfence alone is fueh an By 
As iS^itbcm other flaguei can un^J^ei kiU. 
fFitbcnt her Lo^e, her "Pre fence cannot fa'UCy 
. Slit jihfeHce^ tho kelov'dj "Would folk me to the QraVii 


Among many Excellencies of our Illuftrious Moof^ 
that of Singing finely was none of the leaft Ornament 
tal^ and few could exceed him in it ; yet he took a$ 
much Care to conceal it^ as others do to Pride them- 
ielves in it. As it was very common to fpeak good 
Sfanifi^ at the Court of Oranaday fo they were alfd 
very fond of Singing in that Language^ and efteem'd 
at even better fuicea to Grave and Lofty Airs^ than 
their own Morifco. Nay^ there were divers Moors 
fi> ^excellently skilled in the Spanifi Tongue^ diat they 
made Veifes in it; which were even approved and ao- 
mired 1:^ the Cdfiilian Poets. The Words that (>> 
min futif^y were made bv one of thofe Moors y as they 
were likewife fet to Maftck by anodier Moor^ iri 
•which they were aUb excellent at the Comtof the 
Moorijh Kmg. ' Oaraxa fail'd not to make the Appli^ 
^ xation to her fdf, plainly difcemii^ it was ^en- 
ided for her. She. was willing to take bold of the 
prefent Oppornufity^ to niake fome fort of Reply i 
IbtakingaBook out of her Pockety fhe tore out^c 
Xeaf^ and with a Pencil wrote thdTe Words ^ 

'^ No more Uneafinefs abotic the Knot of Ril4>ons, 
^^the Heart had no Concern in'ti for at Heart . of 
f^ Daraxas Framer^ loves but once^in its Life-cime i 
'^^ and what it^fixes upon^ for the Objeft of its love^ 
*^ it loves too well to admit of ai^other^ Bi$ perfwa- 
*^ ded of it i and if you would know more, LaiJd 
\^^ fliall attend at the Palace-Gate to morrow Morning 
^ at 9 a-Clock. Adieu^ Having 

BookL ^ Guzman d'id^rache^ 14$ 

Having written thefe Words, flie (bfty rolfd up 
the Leafy and let it dro^ dowb into the Lower Gar- 
den,^ thro' the Boughs of the Oranjge-Tree tia^t' con* 
ceal'd her. After this^ H^atever Pfeafiire (he took in 
the Sight of her Lover, fhe was very willing to quit 
the Place and be gone, for fear of fomeill Come* 
quence ; but Donna Elvira^ who understood Singings 
^nd fung well enoudii her ielf ; and who alio was 
chann'd with lb fine a Voice, and an Air q^uite new to 
her^ which leem'd to her to have fbmetfaing fo very. 
Tender ^nd Pafflonate, was not yet ready to leave 
the Place. In vain her Friend beckon'd to her to come 
away j 'twas to no purpofe : Ihe would not niind her. 
The Gentleman had no iooner done his Song> but 
(he call'd to him behind her Tree, Once again, fcfr 
the Ladies fake ; and fhe had without doubt madit 
him go on toaThird^ but for a great N6i(e)tfae^ 
heard from the Palace, by which they prefently ui|- 
derftood the King was returned from Hunting. This 
put them in mind, that it concern -d them tp retsrfe 
mftantly^ to the great Regret of Donna Elmra, wbB 
was in P^in to guefs who ^s Man could be, who 
had &) uncommon a Manner, and (udq & well; iand 
whom Ihe had never feen at Court. She talk'd.of him 
twenty times that Night to Danaxa^ or rather i&e 
talk'4 of nothing elfe io long as they were togeilier. 
Oimin had that I)ay put himfeif in the Equipage of 
aj^an of Quality, to get admittance into the Gar- 
den. He had been informed by Owie^/d, that the 
King was going to Hunt j and he thought it a fit time 
for Wm to try if his good Fortune would britig,f)4- 
faxa thither; to W^lk, as by chance it fell out. ■- But 
after all, he was refus'd to be admitted into the Gar- 
den^ till he made ufe of the Mediation of Motiey, 
that powerful Engine that opens every Door; He 
had already taken leveral Turns in the Walks, when 
he iaw thele two Ladies come out of the Palace into 
the Upper Garden J and Was only td draw theui 

'' ' L over 

Wtt tlo rchcit fidetiQxt biw^ that put him uppoi 3]ng- 
iiig. ^wiff^£/^inf ha4iQiittk<)brerv'd him at die 
BoiL^Ei^ts^ that having changed hi3 pcefe^ and ma- 
luii^ \ unite difierqnt App6araace^ it had hMti mxt 
pb imppifible for her tp reoolleA hitii. Dar0X4y ^ fiie 
haJ(2diy letirpd from her Poft in (he Garden^ havkig 
tmdp.iH(na5ignt0;be.^onQ'fllib5 he gue^'d pre&ntly 
whattiue matta }^as^ and cftktiig up the lucaf flie ha^ 
let £aJl to ^utni, he loon k^ the Inac^ caviih'd wid) 
loy/that .bh Ddign M4 ^o well fucc^ded^ and that 
hesbiAC kaitew hosr aod where to apply htm&lf whcQ 
Occalipns fairly prefenced. He read hisMiftr^$5 Billet 
wnAi a Worid of Ple&%ie, and fail'd not to 1^4 
(kijiejio, the next Mornings who a<)0f>r4Jli^}[ Met 
24iVajtt?the Hour and Plaoe appointed. This was 
t^p£ Bjira»a'$ ji^otifi Wo^ep^ and.had the gitateft 
l^hare^tif . Ker good Opdmoa. She was cover'd with a 

g'eat;fakci( Veil tiO hfnd^i: her beifig lotipwti^ but a$ 
ot) as^e/aw prvhJdy fhe knew hkli and goin^ to 
iupv e^vp him a Letter for his Mafter^ ^nd rec?eiv'd 
ibkc nom him ibr her. Lady, They had together 
m Conytifation loilg enough^ to funiifh t^em wit^ 
fofficiept Matter to gratify both the Lovers at th^ 
IkatvLnii- ^P%nm's JLet^e)- was full of Conjpliments/ 
DJ^/vxi/s^fJuftificatiohsj but all was appeaisM* There 
Is & little pleafttrp in being ^t odd& With whigt we 
t^Qifi that we get recdncird as Ibpn 9s poffible. 'Ti$ 
tme^ t^re is a ibrt x>( {l^ellifh in the Qiarfels of Lo-^ 
Vors^ njfoyided they are Xoon at an End ^ if long con- 
tinued/ they lofe thtir grateful Taft : Nor^ if poffi* 
hSk^ j^oiM th^ be reviv'd too frequently^ for that 
pften<^reeds fll Bloody 4ndis 9pt |^o prpdUQe very 

^ TbisCommestr&b^ Letter^ thus ]?cgulated without 
I)ang»3 Was no ffiriit CtmfolktiOli to bur two L^ 
yc!'^^ and y!f!iriinaB4i<yy*d Huntings asiid us'd it pretty 
Iflefltfently; he was na foohef gone, but dzoftin hai 
^tic^^ ind was oanfiil tdimpitre tw Oj^nunity. 

f- • 

1>^«M wrodd g^^ hAvtpyticfAoneto 
to favre faUc'd with liihi w!th die : greater 
bitt it ioB^ been a Gourfe fu^Oed to a Wpild of 
fiifobe^ -and liable to many Suipiciecis; both of them 
mdft h£te beeh mevftaUy l<m^ had they chaiK'd to 
be d]&61^*d. And Drima Ehira Made it iiill nofe 
difficdt ami daaffe]<oiis ^ for die Sig^c and Vi^ice dF 
this Sciiugior had alrotiy made no fmaU In^ffion 
Ob her Hearty* fi> that Ae ardently deflrU tb fee hitn 
again^ after haying in vain ibaght for^him aanong 
all d^ frequented the Court. She therefore never 
hSl'd^ tfaoie Evenings the Kii^ was abfent^ to go 
and piopofe to heir Friend to Walk in die Gardeii^ 
and tee if the <3endenian tbat iiiiig lb finely coukl 
be inet there ^agtin. Paraxk was elimy perfwaded tp 
have iMs Cooiphixfimce for her^ in a thing fte alfo 
equally de&r^. They ibund lam m the fdnie Pkce as 
at firft. DmAvbt £foir^ woAld needs be ieen by hiif^ 
and tatic \liridi Into ; dnd oblig-d her Friend to do fb 
too. {team ieem'd <at firft fiitpiiz'd to fee them^ and 
ipadea fdnt V)i a feibedfiil Retiring ; but D^n/^ &^ 
^^sb^^anmga Difcourfe to.retain him^' -he enterVi 
idth diein iiioo an agifeeable and ipniely Gonver* 
fttion^ bat ilistl as a Btranger^ A4^ith two unknown 
Ladies. His inuatural readiinefs of Thougb^^ ^uid Pre^ 
fence of Mind^ ftood iiim in mighty itead^ and 
Dtiha Shira^ abaiktated wkh nfore than . Goarnion 
Wiufndi, was notHvantingto flieW the^wcknefs of her 
Wit m ^ its fnll Extent. Daraxa only diverted her 
feif^' as '^e atf eale^ and fadsfied. All was darkling 
•aad:plfei£nt on all Sides ; a^ every Body pleas'd in 
.General, and in P4rdculan Tirtie thus fpent, paflfes 
Imtitoolvtriftly ; At l6aft, it api^ear'd diat thc^ Ladies 
idid not find it teditiis^ and tnat they were not weary 
of -rids .G^M:k^iai/s Company j for the King was al- 
ready come baok^ and got into the Palace^ while 
they ^l^cbmlnQed the Converfation^ iiot oncefb 
^udx ^os tiwdung ^'«Qyring. They had without 
V Lz ^ doubt 

148 The Uf^ aHdiMim\ JPartl 

doubf been furpriz^d, had not the GaiidBiner come to 
oimin^ and put him in Mind 'twas^ time ttf leave the 
Garden. Oi Nfeceffity they muft parf;.'but Donna 
khira made a Bargain firft with the unknawn Genr 
tleman for another Meeting, the- firft fiie- D^ that 
ihotild calkheKing forth to Huntii^. DonnaEhira was 
now fo 6ffd with the Idea of this uhkriown: Spark, 
fo pleas'd with his Wit and Merit, upon this Ctonver- 
iktion, that having taken Leave of him^ She could 
Mt refrain telling her Eriefid, that in her whole Life 
(he had never met with a* Man fo charmingl* To any 
other thari Daraxa; it' had been taking! too much'Li- 
berty to have faid fo 'miichi biit ^flie Taw fo little 
grotincf ifor any Apprehenfion of Dangd-, that it only 
Terv'd to divferther. She had the Pleafore, without 
^ny Care on - her Part:, of being jentertaih'd fipom 
'Morning till Night witn perpetual TXfoourfes about 
her Lover j ^nd Donna 'Ei'cnra^ who had a very great 
Confideiiceinher, arid thougbt her the moft imenfible 
Creature inthe whole Wiarld, no longertonceal'd from 
jief^ that (he found her felf touch'd by the Merits of 
this unknown Gentleman; and that ine was wilHhg 
to find out who he was, and for what Reafon a Man 
-of his Sort fliould nevpr come to Court : N^y," fiie 
jBVen earfteftly befought her, to inquire thefo Parti- 
culars of him the next' time they flrould meethiiA. 
-pofaxa acquainted O^^f^ym'with all thefp notable Mat- 
tersj, and wam'd him to guard his -^ Heart ; telling 
fiim wifhal, it would be ill to abufo the CreduHty 
and miftafcen Paffion 6f fo fine a young Lady; but that it 
Would be Aill more unworthy in him, ihould he make 
the leaft Breach by any Infidelity, in an Amour fo 
circfimftantiated as theirs^ and euablifii <i by length 
0f Time arid fo many p^owerful Rieafomi. that it con- 
cern'dWm'fo -acquit himfelf with^ Honour; ibnt in 
{q fiice ^ Paffion as that of Love, even 4are Appear- 
dijees weft fometime^ enough to make daxigerous Bn- 
perfipnsi-anfl.that When oiie^isjiiipoafe^oix.Df.the 

« • - 

• J » ♦ » 


Hearty oiie m>uld be in full pofleffion of all. d%mifi 
veriiy thpdg^lt has Miftrels meatnt np more than c6 
divert li^r felf, and thei^fore replied ia * ftraittof 
Pleafimtry, ftttencSng to laugh a^ well as flie< But 
the nextitimc he met the Ladies again^ to ReVenge 
himieif for the ftallery^ he employed his utmoft Force 
of fo& asid tender Coiirtihip uj)on pmna: Ehira; 
The Bacterjr was not made in vam i She received all 
his Careifes: in ttie moil ferifible manner ; and ^i^ in- 
flam'd Be^utyj ravifli'd With his feeming TrrfnlportSj 
retum'd ithem double upon hint But at laft he was 
interrqgateidrabeut the Condition and Quality of his 
Birth ttiari^drtune^- He replied. He was a Gent]e- 
. man d:Anj^m^ that hk Name was Jayme Vlvti ^ and 
thac faavjntfi;:.been taken hy the Ma^/, and let 9t liber- 
ty: by the Capitulation of Baz^^ he expefted Reiftit-* 
tance from i^j^t Family, to enable him to put hlnifelf ' 
intOT itn' Equipage fit to appear at Court, iand make; 
himfelf tatown. This wasafliortand plaufible Ac- 
count, Itod r^wai enough in Confcience io^poHna EU 
^ru^ wdid fail2 not- to Inquire if there wai a' Fanfilv 
in iAr^ffliit of ihe Name crfj^t^xj and ihe leam'o^^ 
with an excreami SadsfatfHori, that it was one of thef 
moft iliuftrioos: and mofi ancient Houfes of' thstt ! 
Kingdom! • Hj '-'' 

-Tlm.Inti^e continued for ^fom^ tim#, feuYks th^^ 
Paffion of Donna t^ira was every D^ increaffeg, ' 
our two Lovers 'grew afraid it wo^ld at laft prove; 
trottblefomief . tdi : them. Os^m> ho fooner perceiv'd 
that Zhrnis &v}ra$ PaflSion wa§ in earneft, but he care^ ' 
fully avdided' whatever might give the leaft Dif<ime<* 
to iris Miftreis 5 and except iiich Decencies ihi Ci-*^ 
vilities, from .which a Man' of Ws^ fort coMd not ab*' 
ftain towards a Lady of hei* Merit and Qtiality, he ' 
could not concribute lefs to her Paffion thaiii he did' 
But Doib^ Ehira took fire of her felf. t>ara9CAy th(/ * 
nice enough upon thefc Points* could not find ifi^ ' 
had any. Qaufe to compUin'ofiier LoVer upotf chi$ 

B^4 Syhe pitiMlher I^icod, aod WQuU giadX 1^ 
luifdieceiv^d Mr; and chtt^ as mnchiti Gmnofiqri^ w 
for th9 (Mec and Btfen^ of ber own Lovr;. bui flia 
bj^Uev'd ber Adricos would be ifireoct^'ilp tadfilQ 
wa^f/sarfiil to^expiofe herfelfi l^ tnfyiiing herrwtdi 
Sentiments, of Jjeaioufy, necdlefs and* daaKerous fiw 
her to giv#r her She ttteft oonchubd^ tbit mthfi^ 
ConK^ttioa of. her Fortune^ ibe .mufir nuir fiMiiQ hd* 
VentutHe^ and no( expoft to b& emnr wiqr. hapfqr^ 
Wu^f)( WAS abifi^dy {Utf&'d^ and the Spang-being^ a^ 
hcHK to give anothejp I^iee to the Attasroat Gouit^ 
€mf, loy^r^ muft prepare th$;miebnesri»raLCJim;e.n 
tbdrs. Theibr C^fiSffr&Jt Majefties bad r^Sokr^ m^ 
CqwcU to hefie^ thcr Oty of/ Gtmufd*^ aadi coi 
open the €ftnipaigti\ by for Gtoriooa «nt: j^atapirize. 
The Moors had rujw:]i9itfly ferdfoen itrefte^ die Sor^* 
raider of: B^xyi^ and : ttoy. were> pfcaparii^ Aoa ifeh w 
to dp their heft to proyidpratidbadt bnrthcjp: Ditfsnce. 
Th.er9 was. in the Ct^ of Grtm^y t/ €iad£ba of 
:Lf ooo Menu of the beft Troops of Ki^ Madman. 
Ft/fJifi^nd WM well iinfOrmVl of dlidiefi Thitffis^ and: 
lU^earWiie and Provident Prinoe, had fislici^sedl byJ 
his Minifters^ and the Pope's Itxtenofitttm» ail the 
Chriftiaa Prince^^ that moir'dby. a Priooifdn of Re- 
ligion^ that the^^ would affift him with their Eotce&ia 
fo Great and Pious a Befign, as the intkiety'' chaiine 
the Ii^el$;Out of Spainy and obliging a good pact (? 
th^m to enlace the Truth; He was uEiir'd'Of the 
SuGco]i^rs/pf divers Princes ; he had AaSky News^ diae 
tSey M^ere haftening on all Sides to jbsnihinft^ and 
tbereu^pn ,he made rcmly «d /begin fatf 'March' cariy 
in- the Springs the better to furprias the ikfeMv^ and 
W>!^ giye^.jtihepi Ttme to flfcengthen tbemfefar^s. yet 
njore.. jJ^Tpoops h4d Gbrders to bqgm to defile: by 
the $rflr qf 'Jl^arcb. He w^as co review them the twen^ 
tiet^^ ^tJik4^rcAly four Leagues bom Grunada^ and 
tha five Bf4 twentieth; the City was to be;mv€fted, 

..d ' ^ ' whole 

whole Army. iThe Qpcen, wHd plairfy penteiv^ 
that a Siege of this Im^rtance mmt xieetN continue 
for a coiwderable tunc, took d Itelblutign to ac- 
company the Kipfo tod ijpfs the whofe, Caittpaigcr 
with him. This News being quickly fere^itd, fborf 
feach^d our LpVers ; who at nrft conceiv d (bnie (qit' 
of Joy at it^ as hoping, that in the Huriy ^x^ Con-" 
fufion of an Army, they migjit poffibiy find Mearfs,* 
by help of Orvle^o^ to get into Qranada^ liiic fhcfr^ 
jfby was of a flioxt duration \ fpr fome few Ejajfs be- 
fore the Queetfs Departure^ Dtfr^a:/! was told by her 
Majefiy, Thac (he was not td have the Fatigue of thcf. 
Campaign i and that, for avoiding^ too unneceBa^ 
Troubfej^ tnofe Womeii only^ whcae Senridi' *irai io-^ 
difpenfible, Ihould attend her during the Gainpaigh j 
that the Maids of Honour fliould be left at Stvil un<^^ 
der the Care of their Reldtions^ or of other Vtx&x^pt 
Coniyeration,. to whofe TutcQge they (kqxi^ be rfe^. 
Commended i. thdt as for t)afaxa\x^ vAiyW^^f^'Xik^ 
be conuttittea to the Marquis /& TaMk. lite Qtieeit 
hadmadfc Chouie of this tord for Dataia^ tjot.oriijf 
becaule He wds one of the; l^irffe. Quality ^t* Go^^ 
but becaufe he wis alio orie of the nlol! firefeterpus 
tod moft Courtly, andbex^aulehisjDafugh^wrfsthrf 
particidar 'Sricpa of this beiddM ikfcor. Slfe wttt all 
this New^ to her lotrer, e:fchorting hiin it the fame 
time, to have Patiende to facriifice ^ little Glorr to. 
Love, and not to ^andon her^ unlefs he had a Mihd. 
flie ftould die' with Grief j dttffin havmg.ilteafSy 
fignified to her, fey b'is Letters^ the Defpalr tfhgft tor-, 
mented him, becaufe he w^ not in GranaJa^ iHtit he 
luig^t there be ferViceable to his King afno^Gomi-, 
try, as his Duty and Honour required; Bur' he 
had then ftill iome Hopes of getting' &i^tt timQ ' 
enough to acquit. himfelt as he ought, if his 0efiga 
fucceededrj and if he faw no likelihood of that/ yet 
ftill he wasipo/i the. Spot, and in a Pofture'abxJ'm^ 
f^^a of tKrOWln^^ himfelf;, wktt OH^W*> Inter tb« 

1 4 Toiirii 

ifai - TheUfeaud ABim. ParcL 

TowtL Thb new Order of the Queen broke all his 
Meafures^ and left him no manner, of Hopes. He 
was overwhelmed with Grief atit, and his Mind fJuAua- 
ting a^dft a Multitude of undeterrnin'd Thoughts, 
alternately fuggefted by Love and Glory, uncertain 
where to fix, ne felt fuch Tortures, as none but per- 
fejftly noble Hearts can pofliSly comprehend. Da- 
raxay being informed by the Faithful OruieJo of thefe 
racking Inquietudes ,of her LoVer, was extreamly 
co^cern'd and alarmM at it ; and wrote him upon 
that Subjed feveral Letters, fo paflionate and mo- 
ving, that at laii fiie Axi his hurried convuls'd 
Thoughts upon the firm Bafis of unalterable Love. 
Thus iruns one. of thofe extraordinary Letters, by 
which'ypu may form a fijifficient Judgment of the 
reft. . " 


Jhey tell me, Ozmin, you refblve to grieve 

'' wur mf to Death, becaufe of your Abfence 

'^ from Granada. Be gone, be gone, ypur Heart is 

^'inade for Glory., not for Love. Tciaii Die too, 

^^ and of Grief as you dp j but thpn I ffiall have the 

" Regfet.of Dying for an ungrateful Man, thataban- 

^^ dons me. when 1- want Him mpfti Came you to 

^\ Srvily only to ftab my Heart with fo great Cni- 

^^ elty.? I was miferable enough before^ but I had, 

^^ however, the Confolation of living for your feke. 

'^ 1 thought m)^ felf beIov*d above, all things, 'but I 

*^ l&id.l was miftaken; Is that my Fault, or ydurs I 

^*^'The Love. I bear you, blinds n)g* But, perhaps, 

*' I ask more of yoii than you o.we m^e, ; and more 

^^ than yoii can do for. me. All is immeaforable with 

^\ me/ Biit if yoiir Life' is minCj as y<)u' have laid 

^^ and fworn fo often to me, why then, agairift my 

. Will, do you difpofe of what's mine ? 'And why 

apply it CO any other ufe, than that of forving me ? 

^^ Ahy OzApinl hbw]iiUedo you undetft^nd to LoVe, 

**^ iihce you ftxll ftand v\ need of thefe. Leffons! 




k L cf.Qmoin 4'AUBiacha 153 

And bow far are yoii behind xne in Lome's Racet I 
Glory may be every where apquir^dj but it wo^Ut 
be ho bard matter^ if one had a mind to^t, to ^stA 
out thole who would believe^ that there is a .thftfta 
^^ iand times more folid Gl<ny in prote^g;,aiif| 
^^ comforting one under my Diftrefles ^ tMn^ in 
^ ferviag all the Kings in the Woild. FareweUj/^ut 
^ think on't. / > ./ 

Ozmin was unable to withfl^ ij^ powezi^l^i 
tacics. Love^ as therftrongefi^beqaine Vidpiious XQ. 
this Conteft^ iand he convinc'd r^himfelf /th^t het 
ought to yield to it. ' The Court fet tbrward tpwjir^ 
the Army, and Daraxa was receiv'd into the .Family; 
of Don Lev^u Je PadiBa with fudi HonomiS) aiKl 
treated with fuch Care and Regard^; that bstd (hp 
been Daughter to the Queen her j£lf, no gre9ter 
ReQ)eA could have been riven h?rf There w^aii'n<H 
thing 'but Mfegnificehce^ Care and Study^ in ^v^ryi 
thing file could wifli, and in everv tjiing thatmightj 
pleaie her^ and this was conftantly obJTerv'd towi^jd^* 
lier^ from firft to laft^ as long as fhe continued in the^ 
Family. She had likewife conftaAtly . with her^ h^r 
^carDofma Ehira^ w)io was charmed tp find they wece-. 
now become infeparable Companion^, as w^U b^.^ 
caufe of the real Friendftiip jQie had for her, as ^lft>^ 
for her being the Confident of her Paflion for,rtJ}9» 
agreeable Stranger. There was but one thing w^t^^f 
ing to Dar/ixay to have made r hex tolerably ^aj^^ 
under her Fatej and that was, the EnjpjTOeaf of^- 
little more Liberty than'fhe fouicf ihemufl; expeiftln-j 
that Family. She. was a little unprepared to^npf^ec 
with fo much Reftraint, as having not met witj^fo 
much in the Court it felf This tainted all th^ G^r 
nerpficy, and all die Civilities and Honours of^Pijjji : 
Ltwis% Treatment of her. She had never jfcnoyiriit 
fuch Confinement, fo much Slavery; acs here. Th^y. 
were never permitted to ilir oat upon any manner 


ot Oectffottv Theh: iidiol; Di^ertifeqient confifl^ 
fti'lferef'Pleafixres'oFa>6k]:(fen beautiful enoug^^ vrh^n. 
Afi^ #att*tf kf thc^Erening? at a certain fegulatc4 
Ifettf*^ and a^lrars accompanied either by DotkLewh, 
te^^ orbyliisScmI)onltt)i%(i: tter Apactment^ 
whitfc* was' to<fe/»^ Magnificent^ had no PtoQ>dai 
ftbt^'tfaat ef the Cfarden, and not one Window to- 
wards the Street. 3he faw no body that came from 
without Doors, neither Men nor women ; nay, not 
afljs even cS thoffr 06 rfie Family, but her owa 
Jifc^iv, were pcrtmtred to enter into her Apartment;, 
fliid few eHe of the: Family had fo much Privilegp as 
iiiat. All' this was corer'd with the. BLefoed otTriot 
iocofUmoding: her , and the Regards due to Ikct^ 
whfch^ were the .Colours and Vamift ttouLen^is put 
«^i>this CapttdtVi but with fo much Art, A4drels„ 
|^dd^B:eeding.and courtly Honours,^ diat nothing in 
the World couid poffiblylook more.' natural I>onn^ 
iSvint liv'd no. better^^ nor was treated m any other 
fort; but then ffie had been always us'd to It, andt. 
rflerefore could tiot tafte the Bitternels of it as Da- 
f^ftadiiy who fcund her fetf deprived by Itofali 
Hones of fo miich. as getting but a fittle News of how 
ate lar'tf- with her dear Lover. In this, miferable Stat^ 
J^^lww^EA;ml*s Pkflion for Ozmin became of great Vf£ 
to^ her J for as Ehir^ could fcarce live any lojoger 
wicfiout her dear Don Jaym^ flie was refolv'ota. 
JWrriccr to- himi and*^ ha^ round Means by the help of! 
one^of 'her Waiting-Women, in whom iae had an in- 
tfre CJonfidencej ra procure a Man . independanit of 
the Family, who tiiidertook to deliver th^ Jitter, 
with; 'the tttmoft 'Fidelity. Ehira cDnfu^ted her 'c&ar 
JDdra^m it> artd beggd erf her by Wafy of QaHaa- 
try^; toadd a Ppftfcrlpt in the il^'^c^ri^ Tongue,, tot 
flio'Could not write in SPamfh. pardxd w* ea^y 
IfrevaiFd upoHa^ ^^d this is thd Setife; of wl^ \m 


»i* V *" M 

1* iA^iyi 

^^' AlyfO^B tnott: iLhlamuax^ . ttidr ahoayq. fitted 
^^ and: tnon Paffionanel The whole Happing of *al 
'^ Heanv confiib in &eii)g die Obje& ot iii I;oi|ef> 
^ and: its exstreani t^nhappinefi^ in being- deprived 60^ 
'^ ifx Let m heao fboni you> and^^as fikmaspofliUby : 

!^ dfelcmnotlhiie. 

• • • « 

-• • . • - 

Sinaxai gam wh^t ihterpretatioa: fiie "pleaied of: 
tbd&.Wo^ to 1!>#8M E&ujr^i, who trnd^mood oo^: 
tfaing of/the'il/Mi9Jli Langa^g^ The Letter was oav^* 
ried^ and'OsunJ^ recdrea itwith ai«LB3i9Cafi>of fo^r >•/ 
for he had been extreapdyiin Paia tiiat he/hearVno- 
Ntais^ cf his Miflref% and was. iittei^ » su log tou 
knowKow to .write tp hen He tobk tm^Opportui^ 
ty ofi this^MeflkngQr to do iti» andixnade^Him a geqe^-' 
TomSj^oat to encourage: hioi;' to jpefxirhiwidivano^i 
theDLetien IHiis'unlGbKd^fixBBiiiccrwasfi^ 
fort' to him; simidft: t^e ITonrnnts h& Uiki ewtt foica' 
tbeidofe C(M:£neinentiQC iiis Miibbfs at: Dm i^aiiK/^ 
whidi badt faemt. hithert)o fo ftrid:^ chat hei could qoc 
longer either fee her^ or write to He?;, as he had^ 
doi^^^Miile the CcAirtr remain'd at :&«»/. This^was- 
too/greata Qiangeat once^ nocta:l;e^fenfibly fett^ 
but^ lie . know no Remedy, andi hi» whole Hepes^refti* 
ed.ii^n>the frtrnful^ invention andContrivancesiof 
Ormeh. This faithfol Servant^ wha wis^ exti?eaq|lv^ 
tondr'd at his Maflier:s Afffii^pbn^ dif^^ himleif 
undefi the HaMt dF a common Babonrpg^man^ and^ 
went eiveiy Day roohd^ Bon J&wiVs Ho^. BtAt^HH^ 
the Jkvesmes to it^ both lio try^ to make iome ko* 
quainmnce with iome Fbotman^ or^ other fach d^-^v 
vaMr^ and to fee.i0itw^mjx>fflt^^ to li^htr 

upon any oi limiaxfi^ M6o^Vltims^ CKtie Day as^ 
he was. ftanding} by 'Don Ziti*/#^' Qard^n*waU tban? . 
was repairing^ the Mafter^Mblbn feeing^ him very- 
attentively co^fti^ing< the WDrii>«took Him fop one 
o^l^&fiik l?f«|i|pi aQidc'vizaQtiiig Woidcmen^ becauA^ 



Don Lm^is was always pref&ng him to make hafte 

and dife^tcK thb Wodc^ and Workmen being ftarce 

by'reafon of the War^ he ask'd .him, whetherhe was 

onploy'd^ and if he^as willing to ferve him. Or- 

iriiJo reply 'd, that he was in Wcn^k^ but thkt he 

h^ad a Comrade who was ..out of Buiinefs, and wa £ 

willing to earn his Bread in an . honeft way.< The 

Mafon bid him bring his Comrade to him^ telling 

Hm, if hfc wei* good fiw: notKng but to carry M8r- 

tar, ot bring Stone with the Wheel-barrow,, jfet ho 

would employ him, and pay him very weH.« This 

was enough for OrviVi^ : He returned immediately to 

his Mafter, and told him, laiighii^, what a fine £m^ 

ployment he had found out for him; biit withd, 

that he might poffibly, by help of it, find Means 

to pufli on tne.Aflair m his Ainour, if Love'aiid For-* 

tune would but a tittle favour him. ThisContri** 

vaoce> how Comical Ibever it appear'd^ .was: ex* 

treaittly grateful to OixMin^ . who IroSntly accepted of 

the Employment. He only wlanted a Labom-ei^s Ha* 

bity which was quickly g<)t^.arid OrvieJo die very 

fsfme Evening brought his Comrade .to the Mafter 

Mafon. He told the Mafbn, his^Name w^isJmbrc^; 

tha:t he was a poor unfortunate Soldi^, who. after 

having b^ea four Years a Prifonec among theiibSiM, 

found Imnfelf reduced to labour for his Breadv "She 

Bargain was:£x)n ilruck, and he^wds hir'd;, and or^ 

d<:r'd to corner jand begintocwofek'hext Mof6bg. 

j^mkofio was up .heiiimes to^ attend his new Matter^ 

who,: bringinji hiiriinto the Garden,' puttthe.Wheel- 

barr4w into his Hands, and told liim the Bu&ie& he 

was to do. He went^ as readity and chearfuHy^ about 

it/ as tho* all his Life he had beea bred to the Tr^db. 

His Matter finding him take fo vety. well to bis^Bufi^ 

nefs, was mightily.pleas'd with him^ expreffing hin- 

felf. That if his neW' Labourei' continued, to work 

with fo much Diligence, helifliottld have ataii^hty 

Satisfaction ia him. No bodjtyet-^ear'd.Airriijg' 

« • >-• 

Bookt of Gi^idb d^Alfarddic 157 

in the Houle^ and it was much too early for the 
Ladi^ but the ufdal Hour for the Family in gene** 
nal to be ftirring and about being at laift come^ AtH'^ 
krofio began to fee fbme of the Moarijb Women appear 
in the Windows of D4raxas Apanment^ and toon 
after Daraxa her ielf and Dimna Ehlra. Thefe two 
LadSesj who had no Intimation of this new Contri- 
vance^ were far enough from believing or thinking 
of (Hmins being fo ntSLTy or imagining the Comical 
'Mafcarade he had' bethoujght mmfelf of. As for 
himi he was thus far mighty well pleased with his 
gcbdc Fortune^ and diverted nimlelf with the Plea- 
iantiy of his odd Difguife. He was in full Expeda- 
tibn of. very agreeable Fruits of it^ and was delight- 
ing himfdf Mdth the Thbughts of the Surprize it 
woidd be to the Ladies^ when they fhould come into 
the Garden and find him in that Equipage. But he 
made his EHimates without confldering the Temper 
of Don Lewisy who in Point of Women was moft ter- 
ribly a Sfaniard. An4 ^^nl>araxa had been recom- 
mended to him in fb particular a manner by the 
Queen^ that he thought it an indiipenfible Dunrlo 
watch Night and Day over every Step of her Con- 
duA ; ana that he Ihould iHew lumieff unworthy of 
the Choice the Queen had made of him^ ihoula he 
give the leaft Occaiion for any to itifpeift^ that he re- 
. lax'd his Care but for a fmgle Moment. He knew 
this Beauty wanted no Lover ; and his own Experi- 
ence had taup;ht him^ Love could make Men under- 
take any thmg. I|e did not believe Daraxa was 
more infeniible than other Women are i at leaft^ he 
knew well enough that thofe of her Nation were in 
no great Reputation for Infenfibility^ they paf&ng ift 
thole days to be full of Gallantry and Intrigue. %ilc 
he was yet more afraid from without than from 
within, of the Lovers than of die Miftreis^ becaufe 
Men are naturally more Daring and Enterprking 

than Women. .Tis true^ indeed^ be: whom Don 

i9$ :BeJJifi.gndMi^s IBtotl 

£^jf Im^gin'd he.liid moft <fai^to be ifraid (^^ 
whi<^. <^w 'Ddb ylW^ becdufe ite vms beUbvH t6 
fianct jfftirdl. in the Eftfeem «f fche loVely ^^dt^r^ \(w 
ftiU incomm'tfd^ by his Wound^ and fiirr'd iicft a- 
^{^d^ but the (i^mftierce by Otters tifid :ffJiZ«t«ii)ia^ 
^m'd to DonlMHs to bi di no ld(s dtogerous Cob^ 
Tequetlte tbtn tiie nearfeft Gotjvorfatiofo $ »nd tbbie^ 
foifeiy to euc off all Fears^ he're(blv>d to be iecwe on 
all Sides. He pi'e£'dhis Workmen pedrtmtu^ radiC- 
^atch and fiiake -^n end. /iiioit^d by the Sjtos of his 
0teriial A^^MrehetlHon^ Wft fixne body fliould be fonnd^ 
who mighe bebttld ehbiigh to bndertake (uch la M^ 
iage^ and ih that Difl^uiet he trtxfteidt not fo mtidi to 
his Soli, who was Unother Giiardian^ and of a Spcciios 
yet more VexAtidus dito hiMfeify biktheWbidd V^t- 
M4fe be at <he Patns^ in his pwh i^ro^r 'Petfrio^ to 
accompany thk Ladies eTtry Evtmng into the Gisitir* 
jtfef^ ever fince the Workmeh were bufiftd abbut the 
Repair of the Gar dfch-WalL *Tis mie, iAdeod^ he 
left them thb liberty o( Walkinj^ at th^rPleaituBe as to 
jhimielf ; but then his Sfon was^pecpetoally with them^ 
And gave him the Convtoitocy bf ihtptinrifiog his 
:Workmdn ; but Jmhrcfio was th&vthy put uhdtr die 
^ore Gonftrhiht^ifod by confeqtiefite tmdtrthe^rria- 
tdr Difllculey ^ind TrouUe. Dc^ Lewk ipitlendly 
>ook notice of tii^ new Woikmati^ at^ foofad ^hrni of 
« gmve and ieiridife Afpe&«iaild cihe tliat. U)^i6ar11 
very fiitent ahd ^diHjgent in his. Bufineis $ hut M: €hat 
tidie he facade no'furdier Reflefticxi ^oii4t;^aisl 
i^n a&er^ the Days Work beii^ oversale Wortaf»Bn 
fttir'd, i^;«r^r^(9 departed too with the reft^ and Jnd 
ino other LudK all that Day, but to foe his Mi^b^efs 
M^alkihg up ahd doWh with Ddn HjbM^^ ii^ho was Ihs 
IlivaL Lovfc> wWdi is die moft violent of all 
fPalfionSjfe nevcfrfhelcfi that wMch requires the ^reat- 
feft Paitiehce^ 'fcr it' rarely obtains its Ends, but by 
^^ Gradatidns. Ambt^Jio was wdl acqaakieed yixtlx 
ihis Maxmi i^dus w^ not die firft time he ti^d been 
.. '#% taught 

taug^ it: neidier 4ld he coed jSt- aH Ibr^Ws * firft 
Pay's Diia^okitmenci fo ^ £rom cocdiog^ Am hd 
thoul^ht liiMiifelf V9d\ revoked for idus Diyh IVlbtdife; 
1^ Love*Matters3 he is no Lefer whQ-ol)Mid$ btt'S 
^ance<of his MiAret^ j abundance of hmors^mdulA 
be weU content with fuehja l^vojir^ ahd in >i^» it 
psSks for « Privllc^ of thole <diat hart the more cpe^ 
cuUar Sxidles of Low md Fdrtune. . The ncoot Mokik^ 
ing the AmoroHs Jmh^Ji^ retnm'Hl ¥^ty «hrly Isi! Irit 
Labour^ arid fett. m his Wtork Mmh aUlmagifiableJDS)* 
li|^aC:e. His Mafter was woodiBrfelly ^eas'd wiA 
hinij^ and be^dfi to pro|)o(e Mm ias « Pattern of iiiito> 
ihy for th^ reft to foHowv The Wfaeol^barrow wal 
in fCTpuOfkl Motion ; and as he wti^'d tbe^ Sstoat 
about^ he fometimes ^^&*d throttghoofe 6[ lihe Walks 
whidii lay/Mtder the Windows o( DariMs Apai^ 
taeat; £fe m> foonet 4>i'di L^Vb there^^ but he hegik 

of th6 dliff^r^ Peaftkita / is 
\y Brisk and Gay^ ahd his 
Fellow^workmen knew be had been a lobg time « 
Prifoner in that Countiy^ no body 'wonder d at i& 
fkiging one of t&eir Songs; but i^mii txtteainiy cini^ 
ous to know what Man it trould be \lrho fung w weH 
in thdr iMx^afg^ w'eM ddWa lACO tiie G^an and 
foand 'twas X>zmik. She pretemded t6 hb ^therini 
Flowet5 for her Miftrfels^ as file veiy oft^n idid ; anl 
our Lover^ ^ he Jtettitn*d next time^ irltiibtit any 
ItoppiAg Or looking^ let fall^ ^ <by her> a LaMr 
he had prepared itx a resdinefs for fudb in Opportpi^ 
nityj and ine preiehtj y IhatchHi it ap^ and ran w}ih 
it to her MiftrefL The Suiprize aind Joy of l^ungs^ 
were fudi, as obe may eafily itaa|[^ ; bit ^'did 
not fudge it fit to in^att it to htt Fxiehd^ for fear^ 
leaft hier too uiiguarded Forwirdne6 dkouid ^oilafij^ 
and left it ihoiaid put Whims dfj^ody inrp htt 
Head. Dara^a wa^ as yet in Bed^ but got ^in a 
tri€e> und drefs'd hdr3 that (he nng^tget to th6 Win-- 
dow^ aftd enjoy the Sight of ber vomt dear X^nnar* 


> • « 

'i^ .. The Ufe and ARhns Part I. 

She was (cnflbly afield to fee in what an Equipage 
hcJ was^ and to what a ibrdid Condition he fubjeded 
htmfelf for Lore of hen But the Heart often feeds 
upon diefe Extravagancies ; and a Love^ all finooth 
thderen^ wants its Salt and Pionancy^ and is in 
danger of palling our Appetite. Daraxa writ an An^ 
iWer to thu Letter^ and LaUa took her time to coh- 
veyit tmperceiv'd. A&ihrtfio began in good earneft 
to felilh the Trade of a Mafon. Daraxa was almoft 
all Day at her ^indow^ and he had thereby the plea- 
sure ot feeing her almoft the whole Day. Their lit- 
de private Sig^ wer^ always in Exercife^ continual- 
ly as he went and came by the Window. Thofe that 
were never in Love^ or but very fuperficially, will 
efteem all thcfe myfterious Matters to be a verj tri- 
vial Builnefs ; t>ut thofe that truly know the mighty 
itoroe of high exalted Love, will feel a fecret Trant 
fKort only to hear it told. 

This new Commerce held fome Days. Don Lewis 
did not foil of going among his Work-folks every 
Evening, to qmdton them to a difpatch by his Pre- 
icnce ; if there was now and then ibme Faults thro' 
the Loitering of any, yet ftill heobferv'd, that this 
new Comer never fpar a himielf; but was indefatiga- 
ble in his Bufinefs: He took an AfFedion for him, 
in feeing his ; extraordinary InHuilry, and thought 
with himfelf .he mij5ht probably make him a very 
good Servant, r He drew near to the Mafter-Malbn, 
and ask'd him where he got this Workman. The 
Mafter repUM, One of the JUtiians of the City had 
brought him to him ; and that if he held on as he 
iegan, he fliould think, the Wages he gave him well 
. beftow'd. Don Ltwisj well pleas-'d with this Chara- 
(fter^ goes up to our Labourer, to whom he had no- 
^9iat yet fpoke, 4nd askU^ him from whence he came, 
./^/ir^ repli'd, in the moft clo\enifli manner he 
COlJd poffibly^ perfoliate. That he was an Arragonian^ 
and £> went on^witb an Acgotint of. himfelf, fuitable 
.ni< ^ ^ to 

fedott o/Gu2man d^AlFaradic. ^ i^r 

to what hadj been told before to the Maftcr-Mafon, 
Don Lewis found a fuffident appearance of Truth 
in what h6 faidj and it eVen teemed to hini, that 
his Cduntenafnce and Acdent had the Air of thatf 
Country. He as,k*d hini^ moreover, concerning the 
Mafter he had ferV'd at Granada^ and in what he 
employed him. Afnhrofio having anfwer'd, he was A 
great Merchant, who had a moft noble and beail- 
tifyil Garden, In . which he W2ls ^ut to Labour^ and 
chiefly eihjjloy'd in looking ^ter the Flowers, in 
ivhole Culture and Improvement^ hfc had beeii in-* 
ftru<9«d. This was enough fo prfevail ^bfoltiteiy on 
Don Lf^a^ to take hini mto.his Service. Me kiiew 
the Moors were very curioiis in Flowers ; and he 
wanted juft fuch a Man to look after thofc of hisr 
own Garden. As he had been Three* Months in- 
quiring after fuch a one, \it was not willing to lofe 
the opportunity of retaining this. lie tells him hel 
had already d Gdrdiner, but thiit he was not very 
expert in Flowers; and therefore, if he was wil- 
ling to ferve hi;Ti, and would take Care to cultivate? 
and impf bye his Plants, he would give him good 
Wages, and would alfo take Care of his Fortune ; 
and that he might fecurely depend upon it, in 
cafe he did his Duty with Fidelity ^nd Exa«nefs, 
Ambrofio aded the fervile part, exprefltng moxt bv 
Cringing and Scraping, than by Words, how jferin- 
ble he wis of fo great Favours from fo greit a Mfc -, 
and that he defir'a no better Fortune than tb ferVe 
and pleafe him. The Agreement Was prfclehtly 
made j and Don t^iifis told him. He ha(d no more 
to do, but to lay by his Apron, ^nd t^ke his Leave 
of thfe Mafter-Mafon ; rfnd fo come next day, andf 
enter upon his Employment in his Garden^ where 
all Things Ihould be ready for hini. 

Thus is Ozmifiy from a Mafon's Labbitrer, be* 
come a Gardiner, and that to the Marquis Je Pa^lU' 
Who J at his coming next day, fail'd not, in the firft 

M Pl^e> 

1.^* The Life mJ ASUm , PanrtJ. 

t^lace^ to give him grave and ample Inftrudions^ as 
to the Conduct he was to obferve in his Family^ and 
particularly with refpec^: tp the Women i and that 
not oi^y towards the Ladies^ to whom the utmoft 
Regard was due^ but alfo towards all the Female 
Servants ^ with none of which he muil have any 
(PonverfatjioA^ if he meant to continue in his Ser- 
vice, i^ dwelt fb much the longer on this Chapter^ 
becau£b he- found him, in fpite of all his affe&ed 
Il^iooks and Grimaces^ to be very handfome in his 
t^erfon, and of an agreable Air : And Don Liwk 
was by no means ignorant^ how dangerous an Im- 
plement a handibme Fellow is^ among Women that 
hs»re no other Man they can come at. All theie Lef- 
ions of Continence and Abftinence^ gravely explain'd 
at their fuU Lengthy fufficiently difcover'd to Amhrcfto 
die Genius of his Patron ^ and gave him plainly td 
und^ftand, that he mufl keep ftridly upon his 
Guards and take efpecial Care of never treading 
a Wry. He was no fooner fettled in his Bufmeis^ but 
he would needs begin to exerciie his Talent, to get 
the gopd Opinion of his new Mafter, who was 
come to fee how he went to work, and what he 
could do : And as he himfelf was not ignorant in the 
Culture. of Flowers^ he was pleas'd with his new 
Servant, and allow'd him to be an Artift. He had a 

freat deal of Reaibn to fudge as he did ; for Ozmin, 
ke rpany other Mocrijh Lords, had been a great 
loyer of Flowers, and underftood the Culture of 
tjfiem better than many a Florift^whofe Profeffion and 
Trade it was. Daraxa rifing that Mornijog, much 
earlier than was ufual for her to do, to delight her 
ijblf at the Windqw, was amaz'd to fee her Lover 
difcoiirfing with Don Lewis in the grea.t Flower- 
Garden/ The fight of Don Lewis oblig'd her to keep 
behind a Curtain, to conceal her (elf ^ well know- 
ing, how ypry Speculative he was upon luch fort of 
. pccafionsj^. She knew not w;;hat to make of this new 

• : 'Intrigue; 

» •• ♦ 

look I. (f Guzniari d'AIfaracnc. * ^ j 

Intri^c ; but the Matter of the JHoufe at laft with- 
drawing, OxMn^ to whom Ihe prefently difcpver*d 
her felv m^de her comprehend the whole. Matter by 
Signs, and how he had chang'd bis Matter and his 
Trade- This appear'd venr pdd and extraordinary 
to Daraxa i ike could not forbear fmillng at it:j and 
indeed (he was exceeding glad of it, hoping, ait 
leatt, for more frequent Opportunities ot feeing 
him, and for longer time, and at lefs diftance, with 
a full freedom of writing to him • Pleafures me lit- 
tle looked for, in a Houfe like mat ^ aivi- Pleafures 
file would'very gladly have ifparlngly niade fife of, 
that fb they might laft the longer, ^nd, if poflible^ 
till the Queen's return j but jfEe dreacje^ the'vio- 
lent Sallies of Donna Elvira^ from whom it wai 
impoflible to hide it any longer. She Chought ; it 
moft prudent to prevent JS^/Ws difcovering our di(i 
;uis'd Lover ^ and tell her of it ; that fb fne might 
)e prepared for it, and not at once furpri^xl ixitt it J 
left filch a Surprize, as the. firft unexpe-<9-ed 'finding 
her Don Jajme^ fhould fo difcompofe and difordef 
her, as to produce fbme Very ^ ill Effed, as woul4 
without all Difpute infallibly have happerfd^ , Don 
Lewis talked at Dinner concerning hds new Cjafdiner 
for Culture and Improvement of his Flowers j .iuK^ 
exprefs'd himfclf to be wonderfully pleas'd, thit h$ 
had luckily made fb very good a Choice ; for he 
was convinced he was Skiltul, ^nd therefore "hppedf 
that for the future his Flower-Garden would be in 
better Order. This Difcolirfe piafs'd quickly find 
Quietly over, for no Body made any Reply ib it 2 
Jut when Dinner was over, Daraka leading her 
Friend into her own Apairtment with her, and refbl- 
ving to dilrert her felt a little, Ae fliew'd net this 
Jiew Gdrdiner, of whoih her Father had been fpeak-^ 
ine J aftd at the ftme time ask'd her, If her Heart 
whi^cr'd nothing to her in his Favour? t)or>na; £/- 
^ira^ furf riz'd at fueha Qu^ftiofl/ was qtfite at a loft 


1^4 TU Ufe and ASions Fart I 

what to think otft. She look'd upon the Man, 
and having very attentively confider'd him, flie be- 
jan to have fome fufpicion of the Matter j but the 
ear of being miftaken, and then laugh'd at by her 
Friend, making her Balance between Joy andSnamc, 
fte durft not explain her felf j till Daraxay who 
could no longer hold from laughing, pre^^ her 
to anfwer, and reproaching her with LnLfenTibility, 
made her guels in good earneft the real Truth of the 
Matter. And then fhe broke forth into an excefs of 
Joy, that perfeftly convinced Daraxa to ^ what a 
height of Paffion her Friend was gotten ; and that 
'twas with a great deal of Prudence fhe had pre- 
vented Ehira$ Difcovery of our Gardiner^ in the 
prefencc of Don Lewif^ or before her Brother. Da^ 
raxa m^de her a grave and ferious Exhortation upon 
this Subjed ; reprefenting to her, of what Confe- 
quence it was to Don jayme^ that none of thefe 
kind of Sentiments fliould ever break from her be- 
fore any Perfon whatever. She promis*d to take all 
neceifary Care and Caution of her Condud in this 
fo very important Particular: but (he could not 
fufficiently admire the Addrefs and Contrivance of 
her pretended Lover, who had been able to Out- 
wit her Father in fuch an Affair, who was the moff 
fufpicious and diftruitful of all Men, and the moft 
upon his Gu^rd. To this^ with abundance of 
Transport, ffie added. That certainly Don Jay^ 
muft needs be very much in Love to give himlelf io 
great trouble; and to fubjed himldff to fo mean 
an Employment for her lake. Daraxa knew well 
enough what (hie ought to believe uppn that Score, 
but fhe had lefs Rcafon than ever to undeceive hen. 
There was nbthing now tut Pleafdres and Intrigues, 
from Morning till Night, between the two Ladies 
and the happy Gardineri Each of the Ladies had 
her own particular Confident i Lalda was the beau- 
tiful Moor' ^ I znd Claricia^ Who was tlie Wakihg-Wo- 


Book I ^ Guzman d^AIfarache. 1^5; 

man that I have already mention d^ was the amorous 
Donna Elmrjts. Both thefe Maids were witty and 
expert at what thev pretended to^ and were employed 
in ; and both of tnem lenr'd their Ladies^ in thefe 
Affairs^ with readinefs^ exa<5bnds and jfidelim jttm^ 
hof» acquitted himfelf admirably well^ ana to both 
their Satisfadions. Thus far all was well manag'd^ 
and nothing kppear'd. Daraxa was the general Con- 
fident of aU her Friends Affairs, but Elvira was not 
fo in hers : No^ that could not be ; nor mnft (he have 
the leaft Shadow of fuch a Confidence : For if (he 
had, all muft have been loft ; fo that 'twas an eternal 
Conftraint upon Daraxa^^ that ci^ft her ibmething; 
but there Was no Remedy ; Prudence was none of 
her leaft Ornaments, and Ihe had need enough of it 
on this Occafion. The amorous fair Sfaniard Was a 
diicerning Lsldy ; and ihe was too paiSonate, not to 
be eaiily touched with Jealoufy. The Love-Billets tra- 
veird to and fro, each Party had a particular Hiditiig;^ 
place for them in the Garden ; but Ehira knew no^ 
thing of htt Friend s. Thither the Billets were car- 
ried, arid from thence were the Aufwers fetch'd, at 
prc^r and <;:onvenient Hours : A Poft of Gallantry, 
ib admirably well regulated, that nothing could be 
better Oriier'd or Executed. There was no more to 
do, but t6 have kept ftricftly to that wife Difpofure. 
*Twas an agreeable delightful Life: but how can 
Love flt>p, wh6n 'tis well ? It would not then be 
Love. That Pafiion will endure no Bounds. It re- 
quires a perpetual Spring of new Pleafures j and Toon 
tires, if thfey are not vary'd. The beauteous Sfaniard^ 
who was the moft impatient of our Lovers, be^an 
to find, that the Pleaiures of Seeing and Writinf 
were nothing, when there might be Difcourfing an< 
Converting with what we love. She propoles to her 
Friend, that they may meet Don Ja/me by Night, at 
an Hour when all the Family were in Bea, and in the 
depth of Sleep J that their Rendezvous might beat the 

M 3 Windows 

llTf . ; 7h lifii, m( Mm^. fml 

WiiidffHfs pf die Gallery below ; for^which purpc^5 
Ckrkiayfill uk^ upon her oo get |l Key tojti and 
(h jit thole^Windows being but a Maa'^ h^i^ty on the 
CJar^eflrfide/ cb?y might! ejifily hav? the (i^vf^nience 
and Sap^a<^A of tiiLking with him a$ mugh as (Hey 
pies$% pittt0X02ktfirQ:w'^^ Ikttecrpiibrdiandj^^era'q 
ac thi^ jpfopoial ; this Clandeili w MeQtiri& cfa^' remote 
motigh ft^fjBk all Ppmefti^ D^ngei ^ leenj^'d tohec 
fubjed to v^rifety of ljp?ar4ft and In<?QnK€lrf|enpi^s } 
but a§ iheffe^d nqmind tp.oonverfe fefs rempt^y ufith 
her 4ear Lpver, and to bejjtherisby-abledip teUibim 
fpnietirBes the tender Sentiments of Hi^ffr&pul, %h^ 
vi^ti^f&j^ her Heart. carried the Point 9g^9K th« 
Strength. ai*d Prudence of all other Qonfi^pntiMsi 
'Doti Jayrmjv^s^ piade. acqwinted.^yijti^.ir^i^fhojVy-f 
fuJly 'e»«brac'd trhe Mptton^ He lay, a« tfeft k>W^ ep4 
of ftU.'tbe Garden, inrthe Gardiner's Houft^ :^'£>Oqf 
of which: w^ duly i(hut upas foon-asii'gr^daiik^ 
stnd}ifiii «0.mpreop^n'd till Morrutig, tip gP'toWcitk*; 
ao4t?W>3^#^.dpneby the eb^psrefs ?iBci^^j^ Comv^ad 
o{ Donijei^p^:, not to be ^iwbey'd;, ofl fp»/?f his E>i(^ 
pleafure i :Bw that wa^, ^ PiflicuJty pij^.^av^erdie- 
rpis'd >; h^ Was too learned, ii^ .JU?y€i4fijd|l«W>; tp be 
ft 4 ho& in lb flight a. Matter He fopn^made him a 
taddw <pf fi^iall Cprds^ by mQaps ;pf which h^ 
cpiild St any time, with Eafe^gp .dp^^rathfo'' his 
(Chamber Window intJoithie Q^rden, apd jfetjucn^^gajn 
with equal readiaefe. : He gpt the Ladies jipfi^rm-d of 
thisQgrceable Expedient^ and promised to at;Qend them^ 
fit the.. place ^d TimQ appointed, th^t very, iame 
^ight. The Defire of meeting beingr^qualJj' eager 
j9nd ^arn^it in ail Parti^s^ the How in. M^^ni^ 
washO/bfeoer ftruck, being the amepreft^'4/otyitjai3Kl 
tJte Wind?^ opead, but fh^% a new Scoan^ ftf . raviftb* 
ing Joy v^as ppen'd tpall pw hovtx$.D^n^Elvira 
gave way ^ without any Reftraint, toth^Prdi^fioaand 
impeCcLofinr of hers; that of JP^#X4^ tboV v?Jfely 
wfehheld firom overflowings yet w^^ notbittgrinfcriof 

• • ■ " „ I ' ^ tr\ 

Book" I. 0/ Guzmai) d^Alfarache. tiij 

to her Fftiends, But Ehha would abfblurely engrofi 
the whole Window j fhere was no, way in tne World 
to dilute it with her. Nor had thfe'bfeen mucih, 
would iiie have * ftop'd therd j but as Night naturally 
litres Libeitiftc Wilhes'in Matters Ot Love, ana 
even emboidens Ibmetimes to aft them too, or at leaft 
abates the Reftraims of Baftifulnefi, or covers the 
Bluflies ftrifin^ from it; pur amorous, tranlporte(^ 
beauteot^ Sfaniardy carrifed away by thq violent .Exr 
cefie^ of her Paffion, proceedeid to indulge her felf 
in fome Ibrt of Freedoms with her i)ear Don'^^r/wwr^ 
that were by no means WeH relifti'd by Z)^/3rii. Th^ 
Windows or this Ggllery were' only fenc'd roun'cl witji 
thick Iron-Bars,' at a good wide diftancs; and pcnn^ 
Elvira pift her Hands arid' Afnis quite throVto th? 
Heart's* Regret of her Friend Daraxa. But flie 4aw tKe 
indifpenfible Ncceffity 6? bearing withflt^^nd feeing 
bdides *fecure' of her 'Lovei^V faithful Heart, Ihe 
wifely' ftro¥e • to fortify;' her felf againft all thof^ 
Scruggte? 'Snd Emdtioris, that cffe would Certainly 
have poifond the Peace and Quiet of h^r Brealt 
Oxjntifty who 'perfectly -knew the nice atnti delicate 
Sence tA his'Gountry-vwmen;,' in thofe tender l^oints, 
was careful' to tike Opppittimdes, thro* the Advantage 
given hlfi* for It by the^Obfcurity of the Night, td 
miiagate iiiof€' TroiiBle's' of his Miftrefi, by feveraj . 
geiino, limorous Endeamenfe of her, unperceiv'd by 
Ehfira. • And thus' there was mingled' to the' lovelj 
il/m% Ibifte of the Bittef y arid * fome olf the Sweets^ 
fo umally met with in the ■ Ittcidenf s of tliis:Tyrant 
rf . tender! Amorous Heart?:" The S'i^^ijl* Beauty 
found her felf moft happy, tho^fcc had, by much^ 
the feaft Rerfott to be fo. In this World, ndt always 
thoie that might be, are really happy ^ *tis thbfe that 
think themfelves fo, are only fo in Truth. To be 
hapjpy, and libt know it, is th6 greateft of Miieries j 
to be mife^abte, and jtt fenjby the Pleafiu-e -of ari 
^Rreeabte Foitiane, is wnat may be term'd Happinefe. * 
' M 4 This 

1^9 Th lih ^4 Mms Fart I 

This firit nightly Converfatipn^ had be^fi fo charm- 
iiig to Pmna Isiviray that ihe could not but wiih, not 
only for a f^cbncjt^ but that all ' hpr Nights Wef p to 
1>e Tp (pent, Daraxa's Pleafure in tho(e li(|petings^ 
ferew lenfibly lefs and lefs eyery Day ; bcc^iUe her 
friend^ whole Paflton becamp more and more yiolenti 
was fcarce at length refiraind by any Senfe of Mb- 
defty . Thie over-perplex d Daraxa, at Jaft, ^o*ild not 
forbearV to Iqt h^r Lpver know the uneafy Agitations 
of her Mind) arid that the Pl^afure (J*^ took in meet- 
ing himj'ar this Window^ cpft her ip T§iy degr, that 
'fhe could not wifli it might l^ft any longer. . (^zoMin^ 
who woulfl rather h^ve died^ than dilCQQfipofe hi^ 
Miftrefs in, the leaft, frpm thei/ce-forward avoided 
moft carefudly whatever he could guefs would giye 
her any^ thp but the lead Difquiet^ and chang'dhis 
manner of converting with 'Pfmna Elvira intp a Cold- 
pels next a*|^in to InfenTibiiity. }}ut ftill^ a Man is 
not altogether pf Marble ; and therefore it mpft needs 
Ibe very cJiSiQuIt^ to be cohtinpally expo$'4 tQ the 
amorous Tendernefies of a moft beautiful yoittig 
Lady^ as this enamour'd Sfuniard was^ and yet not 
foretimes forget ones felf. The Crime would be the 
qourting fiich Tpncjerneffes^ or even the not avoiding 

than VJrtu^ is wanting to refi^ it j qnfy a {^feieis 
Stone, pould be fure to conquer in fuch a Trial Z>4- 
raxa^ Meafures were therepre well and wifely ^n* 
ded i anfi her JLover, who only fought tp gfcafb her, 
was wholly 'devoted to obey her. ■ \ ' 

The Mafons at laft had made an end of dieir 
Wof k, and p6^ Lewii being thereby delivered from 
that Care^ from thence-forward left the young Folks 
at their full liberty pf walking in the ]^venings about 
^he jGarden. This was a neW Joy for the Ladies j 
iffhQ flood, not iij fo mi^ch awe of Doii RoArigo^ eipc* 

cially his Sifter^ who minded him not mucbt She re« 
foha to uie him betimes to her talking with jimhr^fo; 
jEUid as (he law him paffing by an Arboufj^ where 
they were fittings ihe defir d her Brother to call cp 
hm^ and bid. him bring them fome Flowers The 
gratifying her Requeftj had little appearance of being 
of any moment ; lb that Don l&^rig^ prefently didii^ 
Ihe ddk'd^, and jimhofia brought them a Btsket c^ 
JFlowers. Da$wa Ehira, with intent to keep him 
ther^ ds long as fhe oould) ask'd him ieveral Queftions 
about his Confinea^at in Granada ^ and that oc^ 
cafioa'd Don Biodrig^ ?q ask him feveral other Parti- 
culars; ^ndy atlaft^ to pray P^r^r^^to talk to.hima 
Httlpia the Momjh Tongi^e^ to iee if he underftopd 
it well. She was eafily perl waded to glratify him in 
it j and the .charming M>or told himj that^ for t 
Sfaniardy he fpoke, it reafonably well. Don, Rodr^ 
hiad already (everal times done him. |he Honour to 
talk with him^ and fqand him to have more t\wx a 
^vuIgar Underftahding^ tho' AmhnSo was not ambi<- 
dous pf appearit^ Ovejr-ienfible to.hiin-. The Ladieis 
were Atisfied wji£ thU for an Intrpdu<%ion this way^ 
hut 'tW9S Might that gave the nighty Pleafgdre to 
'EJmfay 9nd DifplqaAiA to Daraxa^ o^ at leaft a Plea- 
fure toomu^h ^llay'd, As for the Evenings walking^ 
Amk^0o^ under one Pretence or other^ always made 
pne. I>OXi KodrigQy who was every Day more and 
more pleas'd'with bis talking^ and who had al^.a 
De%n to make u^ of him in his Pretentions to 
Dar^^ay ^rew very forward of himfelf to call him to 
theoK Without bein^ requefted to it by the Ladies^ 
and ^eqviently ^put htm upon talking Moarifh with Da^ 
ra^y in prder ^to the Peten he had fortnU Thi$ 
Gardiner^ of the greateft Ingenuity3 being by thi$ 
means Become more familiar with his youn^ Mailer^ 
and both the Ladies^ did not^ as at firft^ Hay till he was 
call'd^ but as ibon ashe faw them in the Garden^ he ilill 
found fomp Pyeteifj or other to go to %\^m j or, if by 


ch^oce he fail'd of doing k^ DomM Ehira AjifaA ready 
with tiers to g<>. look for him^ and was fare tb brff^ 
iHin. Don Rsdrigo did not trouble himielf "about 
riidfe- Liberties Of his Sifter ; he did* not loDiuch as 
nikd her^ not ih 'the leaft lUfpeiding that a Sfenrame^ 
and that of irifeliqur Rank^ coatd-^^t* be regarded 
h^ a Sifter of ftis. BatDa^xd^ who beheld DcMi jF^/- 
fmirk'Amlh^Jhy ahdOzmininJ^on JSyftk^^BXA ^pre- 
fertted continually to her felfj the Viofencc <rf £i^ 
nAras Tranfports^ could take no I^leafiire in any 
of dieie Matters; and I^fi}i^efs by ' Day^ and 
DJfguiets by Nijghc, were more than i littk tbo 
much. Shfc^had given occafioh to her own- Unha})^ 
' nefs. Shen^M eafil^^ bad (he been lb ^ei&% 
ive put a fk>p to it at its firft Appearance. ChimiH 
tiadiiothing contributed to it. Heevehtotdhdr codti^ 
tmMVy it was tronblefbme to him^to enddre4t;v*^Si]e 
c^atff blame honebut her felfi f H^r own Deftiny had 
t&t&vi^n her into it. But at 1^^ ^ cook a Relc^utlon^ 
-tfeat?^ coft whatitwouid^ ibe would ||reTent the ftme 
Deftiny from compleating her Otihaj^inafs^ in th& 
PcAht, by her own oret-com^aifaiftce. The nicety 
of the Matter confifted^ in taking hit Meafures with 
lb hiueli Caution^ as to keep die Remedy &om being 
ivt^ori^ than^ the Difeafe. For^ ^$ to the oUigit)g 
C^totb break off his ConVerfation with^fii^n^^ 
iioAing wa$ ntore eafy J this* tinalcerAle JJcfifct Was 
intirfly diip6s'd td obey her in that. But then the Gon- 
fequences of fuch- a Rupture were greatly to t5e lap- 
pfcb^ndedj, confidering the Violence of EMf^*s 
PAd&on. Daraxd:, upon thi&Occa(ion^^ftQodin need 
df ^11 her Wit and Judgment ; dM flie was^ hsippAy 
Toriier, of a Temper and Humdiir, n&vertodowiy 
jthiiig of which fhe mi t * 

' ]&uiits now titrie to acquaint yOti 'with fome Paiti- 
|rtolars, without the enclofure; of ©on Leii^i/^ Hoofe^ 
jn a Gity where Daranas Beauty had made too many 
Cbrigueib^ ^beimirdy forgotten fo icon* Among 


aU her t Lovers^. I)on j&mfoy iliU more amohMi^.tfaao 
ev^, aad bei^g .now pretty w^U reciQnrer'd.c^.fats 
W^i^d^ and begjomt^ to get abtro^d, grcWvqoim 
impacieni to be tYm totally deba«'d of &eing Dmiatiit. 
Hi^d been iniorm^^r to his extream TroaUe, tbatthi 
Q^een had pi9;hkvk>yely M]ili!elsi«w> DoniZ0ii;it?s 
tldi\4s«. Thi$ w^^^ubly aa AffliftiOiiitQhiin'^^ias 
Mrell fpr 1^ Awr60a that l^e^tOMicaUy had.ior 
lioii: R^rig^y 9^ ^or;the JealouTy indl /Attipathyv'tiF 
a k)^. fiandkig^betweea bis Funiily^ ^od .due of 
Pod j;€i^«r. TiHf^ma^ thai: Placey that ^f it ielf vas 
infl^^i^ffible tQaH M^tit ^ be farjipoil^ ibrto hiite^rahd 
et.h?n)u^rnee4s/ a{ atiy Rate^ get: (otne Tidings of 
is.'Miftre^3 and 'fee her tpo^ if it. Htere any ,wBjr 
pofl&bie*: Ift.Qrder 4Q tbis^. he had/tsikoi Care to em^ 
pl<^.ayc(. Bn^^ft ftodiEmiffaries^rto tiry to win hka 
foi|ie Woman belongktgfi^Doii^^^i' JSi^a;; and ClariOs 
was ihe on whpfnr thp'^Lot^leJI.: .She:was aiwkty in^ 
trig3)ing Gid^/f^ljmdlr/^ddy^ tried. iamanagiiig La* 
veK-Secrets,: andi wllinK to embark, if properly .e^^ 
gag'djand i>oda ^^jS^ was ycmig^lMttidlbaie^ w^^ 
fmuAting and Kbewl WofMn i rf her .fort, icHoin 
Icm rc^thefifm Att^S'OfiMeaioLhis.* Doa*^^ 
fcw/Tdefirld nothing:, of her, bufe::t^ feryej him as to 
Dar^0 in tk^ fitvSingf&ixm Strat^geM^ far LoveThas 
Straf(^en3^ asiweJl.asWar, to help to the Sight of 
be£ $ Andf if pofSbky v(^ fpe»k .wkh her. CiMridia^, 
HF^Lfmidbefore-bao^ 4^^^ ji: txwkftbe, if yotiwmild 
engage: a. Cdnfidepr ^ Xetve yon heartfly, ps6m\s'd 
him Waders ; .a^d^v,® ajt BarneiE of her Zeal .£op 
hkServi^ei bcihj^ught \m (^U of acquatnting^himrwidi 
aU th^ badp9i&^ oi^wei^ her l^fttefs and Don Jayi 
»»* fdwsi whOi :pf:4 QfiWe tord of the Kingdom of 
^^gofh Md made hkoTelf a, Gardiner lor Lote of 
her. . ^fcij/i took a World of Pleafiure in hearing this 
relate^ • aad infortrfd btmfclf. in the moft minute 
Particulars of it. NaBody eoiuld.ftri$fy his Curiofity 
io i^t; PoiACj heittj^r tbaa Ckncia ; fear ihe had been; 


I7i The Life and ASiibfis ^^tiL 

entrufted with the whole Matter^ and nothihg had 
been done without her. - As for l>ara»ay (he appealed 
fiot to have any part in dm Adventure^ other than as 
a true and faithnil Friend. But in vain ic was^ that 
Doft M(mfo tumi'd his Thoughts all manner of Wavs^ 
ta find out who this Don J^me Viws fhould be^ 
whpni he had never heard of before^ neither in the 
Cbuft nor Army ; and yet^ who was a Man of that 
Quality and Merit. He could by nb ttieam tell what 
to rSbkuk on't. But ftill 'twas pleaiant and diveiting to 
horn ; and he would fain have found out iome way 
bf njakin^ 4m Acquaintance and Friendfhip^ \{irith a 
Verfon of thatdiftindion^ to ad: in conjundion with 
him^ their Matters being not much unlike^ and^both 
didr MiftrefTes ihUt up together. This Thought 
ufherd a thoufand others; and being young, amo- 
rbtis^ and naturally adive and daring, he was touch'd 
witlr Emulation, and even with a little Sh^ne, to 
think he had not had as mueh Dei^tericy and Courage 
to make his Way into this Hoiife, arid to dp for the 
beautiful Baraisa, what another had done for the Love 
of Denn^EhifMi His Mind was filPd with a thoufand 
Defig^s, *all turning upon this one Point, and yet aU 
diverting, pleafant and entertaining to him. 

Daraxa was. ftill purfued with Fears and Cares; 
Jodoufy difturb'd the Quiet of her Breaft^ $nd all 
her Tnoughts were eameftly employed to fiitid out 
i^me happy Expedient, whereby, without risking 
any thing, fhe mi^ht be ame to re-^ablifli her for* 
mer Tranquillity of Mind. Doma ElvirM was con- 
triving, at the feme rime, to fill her Heart with 
Love's fupr^am Delights. She was periWaded, that 
Love was not made for nothing but eternal Sighing,* 
tiiat there was a certain cpncluf«re Point, and intimate 
Bud, in every Intention of all Things j and that, till 
they arriv'd at that, they remained iniperfeA. She 
had, as fhe thought, a Lover who merited all hpr 
Efteem, and her whole Heart. She pjac'd her intire 

Book I. of Guzman d'Alfarache. 17^ 

Happineis in pofleffing of him^ and (he imagin'd^ 
that this Happinefs depended only upon her (elf • 
from all whicn^thus (he rea(bn'd with her (elf. Why^ 
fmce I can be happy^ (hould I not be fo I Can I ever 
poffibly wiih for a more dofirable Man ? And hovir 
miferable a Life (hall J be fure to lead^ if I (fay to 
expert my Father's Choice, and that he gives me one 
for a Husband, in contradiAion to the Sentiments of 
my Heart! Dmna Ehtra continually revolving, for 
feveral Days, thefe and fuch-like Thoughts in her 
Mind, with lefs or greater agitation of ^irit, as (he 
was more or Ie(s pre(s'd by the Fits and Intermifltons 
of her Palfion ; and ooncludihg in fine, that for th^ 
Quiet of her Mind, (he ought to be once for all in(e^ 
parably united with her dear Lover ; (he determined 
to open her Mind to her dear Daraxa. She (lood in 
need of her, to break the Jicc in making the firft 
Overture, the(e being fome Remains of Decency (he 
ftiil retain'd ; and therefore deflr'd to fpkrc her (elf 
the Blu(hes and Confufions, from the Struggles of 
Virgin Mode(ly, with violent raging Love, at the 
difclofing her intentions to Don Jayme. She conlt^ 
der'd it as a great Advantage, that her Friend was al- 
ready (b very well inftruSied in the fecret Sentiments 
of her , Soul j that (he, knowing (b thoroughly the 
whole State of her Affairs, notmng of what (he was 
to tell her^ would be any Surprize to her. She be^ 
liev'd her to be intirely in her Intereih ; and after 
the Complacencies (he had had for her, the leaft (h« 
could expeft from her, was a hearty Willingne(s to 
ferve her upon this Occafion, on which all her Hapf 
pine(s depended* Dmraxa harken'd to her, but not 
without an extream Trouble, and violent Conrtdfiom 
of Mind. Notwithuanding that admirable Com* 
mand of her felf, wherein (he fp excelled, ft had not 
been very difficult for any other, befides DmnaEhira^ 
to difcern her inward Agitations by her outward 
MieA i but Ehirif's Thoughts were too buiy upon het 


tj^4 ThiUfe and ASikhi Pant 

own Cottccftimems^ cq be at leifiire co make any 
keitnarks upon another. The Jealous Daraxa ha- 
VH^had line to reoorcr ber lifual Temper, during 
this Difcourfe fo odious and affliding to her, put on 
a grave and ferious Look ; which was inftantly ob- 
ienr'd by El'ttira, and taken as an lU Omen to her fo 

Eaffionatc Wiihes. IXara^a began, however, with tel- 
ng her that fhe was wholly difpos^dto comply with 
hsx Desires ; but that ihe could not anfwer it to 
Fnendibip and Honour, ihould (he omit to ask her, 
as became a real Friend, whether flie had well re- 
fleifted upon what* ibe was going to ido j nor could 
fiu^ forbear reprefentin^ to her,. at the fame time, 
uitp how many Mifchien ibe was going to precipitate 
her ielf, by io raih an Adion. And thereupon Ihe 
laid before her, all that in Reaibn might make her 
afraid to execute her rafii DeHgn, as well with Re- 
gard to what (he ow'd to her Birth and Family^ a^ 
what (he ow'd to her felf. From thence (he proceeded 
IP th^ Confiderations refpeding her Lover, who was 
a qieer unknown Stranger ; of whofe Eftate, Birth 
or Merit, there was nothing appeared, other than 
what he himfelf had faid ; on which, it would be ^ 
great Impru(kncfe to rely intirely ; and yet, that fee 
wa^ going to make him fuch Advances, as were ne- 
ycf. decent for any Virgin to make ; and yet far lefs 
ifor one of noble Birth : And fliould it happen 
ijiat her Ad^^anccs. fliould not be received according 
to her Wiflies, as that might poffibly happen, ic 
wpQld proye zn eternal Grief to her^ and a Stain that 
T^ could never, wafli a[way. All thefe Remonftran- 
f$^ tho' juft and right, were very little felifli'd by 
.&0MW Bivira ; who^ impatient to hear fo long Rea- 
fo<ri(ig upon wl»t fhe had already refolv'd, made 
he^ the beft An^rver fhe could to all her Scruples ; 
iiipplying wlwt was wanting in flrength oFR^afon, 
wich Excufes drawn from, thb eitcefsof her Love; 
which: iiolongiec p«;niiictei^^ltnr'(a follow 4iW other 
r- . ^ ' Advice?, 


BoQk J. 4 QxaXG!^ d'Al£u»che. 1^7; 

Advices, than thofe of her Heart. When therefore 
Varaxa ia\v there was no Hopes that Reafon ccmld 
prevail, not being willing to vex hcs too much, il^ 
promised to do her this Office of Friendfliip, aadta 
break it to Don Jayme the very fame Ni^c j buc 
what a little difcompos'd her was, that£/w4, whe-. 
iher thro' Diftraft, or to be the better informed of the 
Succels, would needs, be prefent her ielf behind ^a^ 
Curtain, and unknown to the fuppos'd Don Jyfmu 
It was now grown late, and the Houc was pait for 
dving him notice' by Writings yet fhe comfi3rce4 
her felf in the Beliei^ that the Difcourfe. ibe fliould. 
make him would in all Reafon (6 much fiirprize 
him, that he would make no doubt but there was 
Ibme Myftery in it j for he was not a Man who al- 
ways ilood in need to be inftruAed, a Iktle Hint fuf- 
ficing to put him upon his Guard againft any Emer- 
gency. This fufficiently appeared upon this Ojp- 
cafion ; wherein 'twas impoflible to be lefi furpriz'd 
than he was. The very abfence of .I>a9ma Elvira^ 
made him prefently fufpeft there was ibme Novelty 
in hand ; and no fooner had Varaxa begun to enter 
upon the material part of lier Dilcourfe, but he. pre- 
fently underftood the drift of the Matter, tho' he 
never, till then, imagin'd that the lovely Spaniard 
would have pufli'd her Point fo very clofe and home. 
He was of Opinion, that the beft Turn he could gi^ 
it, was to take it only for a pure Piece of Raillery, 
and he did fo; and whatever Daraa^ qchM iky y to 
make him underftand that it was very lerioufly 
fhe was then fpeaking to him, and thgt he ought to 
aniwer her in the fame manner ; yet be iUll oonti-*^ 
nued ading the fame Part to the end of the Conver- 
(atioa This Night's Meeting being, thus jwafted, in 
a manner difagreable to all Parties, it was broke 
up fbpner^than was ufual. Don Jaymv^^ even the 
firft that grew Weary of it, and defir'd tiWyeto witb- 
dravtr. Daraxa thought £be had dul^ ^4ffcha^'d her 

/ Part, 

If 6 The Life and A^kni Part t 

Part^ and that (he had really out-done her felf in it. 
Her Friend had quite another Opinion of it ; flie 
was; altogether uneafy and diifatisned ; and imputed 
CO Daraxa^ all the wrong Conftruftions, andburlefqtie 
jbcoie Argumentations of D()ri Ja;ffne. She Conclu- 
ded from thence, upon the Whole Matter, that no 
Proxies are proper in the Affiirs of Love j and that 
one mufk tranfad: ones own Btritneis, by ones own 
Hands and Tongue, as well ds in ones oWn Heart ; 
becaufe the* Party immediately concerned, always 
beft knows what 6 fitteft to be doife, and in ^hat 
msbiner; and thus ftie Hill fupportec^ her Hopes, 
flattering hei* felf, file could yet find the Secret to 
bring her belov'd Don Jajme to the Point fiic fo paf- 
fionately wifh'd. 

Daraxa plainly faw, that, do whatever fhe Could, 
Che was to be char^'d with all the Blame of the ill 
Succeis of this Intngue ; but 'twas no mofe than! 
what Ihe lopk'd for, and there was no Remedy for it. 
She had been very lorry, had her Mediation fucceeded 
any better than it did j and flie repos'd that Night 
much the better, becaufe Things pafs'd according to 
her Wiftles. As for DmfM Ehiray flte was far enough 
from fleeping j but having had time, during the re- 
mainder of the Night, to let the Impetuofity of her Ar- 
dour in fome meafure abate, fhe found her fclf next 
Day a little lefs tranfported, and thereby ftiore fit, 
and better difpos'd, to diffemble the Anxiety of her 
Mind. She confider'd the Calmnels and cool Temper, 
wherewith Daraxa manag'd this Affair, as the refult 
of her Prudence, and thought fhe might very well 
eitcuie it, becaufe (he might, reafonably enough, 
have more than common A^prehenfions of embarking 
her felf in fo very doubtful a Matter, They met 
again neict Morning, but without imparting to each 
other their fcreral Sentiments upon what had pafs'd. 
Each had her diftincft Reafons in private to her felf; 
snd^ ^omtKis Hcne^ both were on their Guard ; and 
.- -- Was 


Book L of Guzman d^Alfarache. 

'rwas a Trial of Skill, who fliould be moft Politick* 
They took their JEveningWalk according" tpth^ir' 
ufiial Cuftom, but there tell out fomething ni^^ an4 
unexpeded i an Adventilre; of fuch an Air/ To p{ld 
and fmgular, as if exprefly ' cpptriv'd by lovp him- 
felf, to afright, embaraft and donfoundj arid yet ia? 
laft to prove in favour of the generous cdnftantpafjGpj^ 
of our two illurtrious and extraordinary Aloors, Pprt 
iloJrigOy as I have already told you, W^s in love w/tlj 
the ever-charming Daraxa^ or, however^ he thoughf 
fit to pretend to be fo, for LpVe had no great Domi- 
nion over hini, his art^Prbus PretenOons reCultiflg 
inore from Vanity, th&n any fix'd Inclination, Me* 
V-erthelefi, he was more than a Utplo'nioV'd^ gyert 
from that very Vanity/ to h^e more Iii^b: 
preffions upon his Miftrefs. ' HI? Atteoipis Hict bee4 
many, but, to his no little M<!>rtification, ^H to nppurT 
pofej he ftill met. with^^etptetualRepulfes, una thsi 
lame civil, yet cpld Indifference. But, Hp\y$Argr, this di4 
not much difgour'age him ^ and as hp. w^$ rioije. pf fhd 
moft violent Xbvers, he gave himfelf ftp great X>lh 

?[uiet about it. He comforted himfelf with the Plear 
ure and AdVantaee he h^ above his Rival§^ ip th^| 
he could vifit ^na dlfcourfe his Miftrpf§ \wh^tx h4 
pleased J and this fed his Vanity, a$ fom? fort pf ggPd 
Fortune and Diftindion^ ift favour of hin^ ap^ j^ 
Pretenfipiis. He had obferv'd 4mbro^ to be a preft^ 
fenfibie Youth, and eyery . Day irnore and aiQr§ djr 
ftinguifli'd him, to be careful and skilful \n i\\ Ij.e gA.i» 
dertook. This inclined hitn to thipk h? might i% 
ftruA hint with good SuccqIs, to affift hirrj iji Jiij^ 
Amour with paraxa j and ip purfuit of thi$ TThpughtL 
he had takep fit Occafions, to impart t'p him hu .tpir| 
for her. He had ende^vour'd, by foirle JitilgJ J-ibe^a,; 
litics, to engage hini to fpeak of him.rp hen "^xih 
Refpe.a 4iid Advantage, as often ^s he found Vp^pp* 
tunities fo^ it ^ but he was that pay refoly'4 10 f fll 
ploy hiiii in it dire^ftly^ and in good earneft. Hp ha 

3» ^' defig 

f y» Tht Ujt and Mioni ^ txa i 

defign'd he ftiDuId entertain her at large^ and in a very 
di(ftm<% and particular manner, infthe Afocrijfc Tongue, 
wherein ihe feem'd to tak6 Plealiire to talk with him, 
concerning the extream Paffion he had for her, and 
try to bring her to fome kind Temper towards him. 
Atnhrofio told his young Mafter, with a world of Re- 
^e<Ji, That he did hini too great an Honour, by en- 
ff ufting him fo far ; and that he Wanted neither De- 
fire nor Zeal to ferve himj nor eveft to deferve the 
g6od ^Opinion he had of him, but that as he was very 
unskilful in thofe Matters, he was much afraid that 
h6 fliould not be able to anfwer his Expedations. 
HqtiRodrigo defur'd no more but to fiiid him willing, 
ds he feem d to be ; and, as he was always wdl-^on- 
ceited o^ himfelf, told him. That he would have no 
more to do, than t6 follow exaftly the Orders he 
fliould give him j and if he did but obferve to do fo, 
lie made no doubt of .having good Succefs ; and 
thereupon he gave him full Inltru Aions, in every Pointy 
how to manage for him with the lovely Moor. That 
very Evening, when the Ladies were fate down in 
the Arbour where they coiiftantly relied themfelves, 
after fbnie Turns in the Walks to enjoy the Plea- 
fure of the frelh Evening Breezes, Ambrofio having 
brought in a Basket of flowers, as he us'd to do, 
Doii Rodrigo bid him make up the Nofegays himlelf 
for theXadies J and at the fame time, making St Sigit 
1K) hi$ Sifter to follow him, as if he had had Ibme- 
thing to. fay to her in private, he went out of the 
Arbpur, and ihe after him. They were no fboner 
l^oth gone out, when the pretended ^^^r^e^, feeing 
feis^ Time .now co^e for opening this new Scenfe, was 
about to begin it in a Tone of Pleafantry, as he ilia- 
ita^^d himfeify With the Sifter's Propofition; but p|er- 
jcelnhg in Daraxas Face an Air or profound Grief, 
jSfid^ah fextreartu wan and dejeded Look, that more 
'^thgmTuffifcienxly fiiew'd the violent Agitation and Pit 
feompofure dfiier Thoughts, he was moft feniibljF af- 

BOokl 0/ Gdiman d^AIia^^ iji 

feded by it ; and puttm^on a Manner and Mien more 

propomotfd to her Grief, I had a Mind^ iaid he, to 

have diverted you,^ upon occifk)n of tljc 'Part g^vesi 

me to id at this Timt before you, tod whidi is, ini 

fcort, tcry near ^-kin to thdt which yon were laft 

Night put u$>on with me ; hit I And you fo far from 

being in H Humour to he diverted, ind, indeed, fo 

bver-ivhelm'd by in ^tcefi of Grief, that I Sm ereri 

ftruck bjr it into a mertd Inquietude. Dataka fetch'd 

a deep Sigh, but thade no Anfwer j for her Hearc 

was lb intenlely wounded with the tapnciofis con* 

ftant Msllice 6f their Fortune, lind the continual Un^ 

happfaefe of their Lo^Cy which yris {Jerttetuklly tra*. 

vers d in all Thkigs with endlefs Crepes, that the 

too deep Impreflic^s, and too dark Ideais, incelpttitty 

repeated, ^uite dejeftcd her Spirits; Ozmi$iy w 

^vhoffl that Silencfe w^s st mortil Grief, befooghf her 

tiot to drive him to De(pair, by declining to tei hiai 

know Why fhe was thus exceftively Difconfol««. Let 

nie b^ y'ou to fpe^k, pur&ed he with a pa£Sott»te| 

Air,, for this Silertce, And thofe fniother'd Sighflf> fecal 

to ffiew tnore Mifchiefs tliinlWoiild Aun to hear. 

Is it not too |uft €i Catufe, even of the extreari Txoii^ 

We in <vhlch you fee nie, replied Ihe, With a kment^- 

ing Voice, to find mV felt eternally perfecaited bj^ 

the Brother, and, at the finie thhe, to fuffer lyhat I 

do by the Sifter ? But dear Daraxay repKed. ChJUim^ 

interrupting her, sind hoping and ftrivin^ to eonifore 

her, eVen ill you mentioft, tho* bid enougfy^ hv^^ 

rtot worthy the "Itroutle therein I fee fotL How ! 

replied ihe. Is it nothing then, to be ever^ £)ay t)ait- 

ed a^ I ^, in at manner crael atiough to hm&d 

Heart, far left Teiwler ind Senfibte thitntniae; ^ 

to be, perhaps, upon the very lirtnk of reproaching; 

my felf with tob rnuch Juftide^f that ftr^ tooj^reac 

Affiirance of your Fidelity has coft Cn6 aOl tJfe feuref 

Quiet of my Life ? Could fm dien ft^ft iitic^ tt^ 

plied bxMin, with at world of Cot^t^, to l* ti^ 

i 8 o The L^e and AMions Tml 

ble of fo criminal a Weakaefi ? Would you^ cohti- 
nued he^ widi ^n encreafe of Tranfport, do rae fuch 
an Injuftice: You-, who fo well know my Heart, 
* who know it values it felf for its ftri<9: adherence to 
Vertuc, and are fo well able to judge whether it be 
<Sapa1>le of the Gpilt, or even of the ihadow of a 
' Guilt jof Treachery ? I confe% indeed, Oz^win^ re- 
plied fhe^ wiping iway fome Tears that fell, I am to 
blame to be thus alarm'd ; but I love y ou^and you know 
my Weafeaefs j why willyou not then fpare me fuch 
tormenting Cares and Fears ? Your Ciomplacencies 
for the Fair and Amorous Ehira have gone a little 
too far J had they coft you- as much as I have paid 
for them, you would not have been fo very liberal of 
them as you have been. At leaft, you 'may now 
plainly fee the pernicious Effefts they have wrought 
in her Heart, and to what an excefsof Extravagance 
her Paffion is arriv'd. And who will fecur e me from 
the dangerous Confe'quence$ of it ? I v/ill — -^-^ Ot* 
fninvras beginning to reply^ but llop*d there^ at the 
nnekpedied Sight of Donna Ehira and her Brother, 
who juft then came both almoft together^y runniag 
into the Arbour. Ozmin did not look for them fo 
loon, according to what Don Rodrig^ had laid to 
him ,• but he had not been able to keep his Sifter 
from returning her Interefts at this Time, being 
quite different from his. She grew unquiet and im- 
: patient at what private Difcourfe might pafs in the 
Arbour j and getting away from him, and running 
'with* all her Force, fhe got bac^k ^gain before he 
could overtake her. It was a very dumb Scene that 
pais- d among thefe four Perfonsj^and yet, as dumb 
35 it was, it told more Tales> er at leaft it rous'd more 
Thoughts, than confified with any of their Intentions 
or Expectations. They at firft mutually beheld one 
another, according to the differing Interefts that they 
-feverally had ,• and as all of them had in their Faces, 
-certain Marks oir-Xracks of the fecret Agitafic^s of 
I. J ' ; their 

BookL 0/ Guzman (PAIfarache.^ i$i 

their Hearts^ and as thele Marks are not always (6 
diftindly intelligible as to declare exprefly what is 
intendea ty them, fo every Body naturally interprets 
for bimfelf^ and k> did each of them. Ozmin pre«- 
lently recolleded himfelf^ and perceived what an in-* 
different Figure he made; and as he had now nothing 
more to do there, and as it therefore was indeed his 
Duty, as Amirefio, to retire, that (erv'd him for a de- 
cent Handle to withdraw himfelf from (b dangerous an 
Accident. Don Roirigo no fooijer faw him out of 
the Arbour, but impatient to know what had pafs'd 
between hini and Daraxa^ and to inform himfelf, as 
to thole Sufpicions that were tifen in his Mind, from 
the unaccountable Manner and apparent Difotder 
wherein he had furpriz'd them/he prefently followed 
him, and with an Air and Mien full of Conftraint, 
and plainly expreffing the Trouble and Concern that 
then 'moft fenfibly touch'd him, he ask'd him what 
happy Succeft from the good Offices he had done 
him with his Miftrefs. Jvfy Lord, replied h^, you 
luve given me fo little time to talk with her, that ^tii 
impoffible for me to have done you any connderable 
Service^ And yet, replied Don RodrigOy in that little, 
time, you muft needs have faid fom^thing to ^er of 
a more than com!Qon Importance., to have caus'd her 
Looks tobe (b much changed as I found them, and her 
Eyes to be ftill wet with the TeJ^rs, that moft certain* 
hr (he had newly flied. I believe, anfwer*d Amhrofio^ 
that fhe was not- very well pleas'd with the Freedom 
I took^ to (peak to ner of your Paffion j and, per- 
haps, the Remembrance of her paft and prefent 
Condition, were thereupon the occafion or thofe 
Tears. Can you give me no better Reafons for fuch 
a Change, replied Don Rodrlgo ? I cannot fb well 
guefs, my Lord, znSwtt'd Amhrofio^ at what her 
Thoughts may be^ but that I may very eafily^je mi- 
ilaken. How can I tel^) contihued he, as if he' were 
making GfueiTes of whitt^might poffibly be the Cafe-^ 
' • >** Js[ 3 whechq? 

I g » 7h me and ABfotti^ Part l 

whether fhe may not already have engag'dher H^art j 
foTy to fay tmtb, it would be Ibmething extraordinary, 
}f 9 young L^^dy^ fo qualified as fhe^ fhould never 
meet with any thine worthy of her Thoughts, in a 
Court fo full of Gallantry »s th^t of Granada. I am 
f s well convinced it is fo, as you are, replied inftant- 
ly and warmly the Jealous Don Rodrigo: and further 
yet, that your Bufuiefs here is not to (erve me, bu| 
that happy Rival I cannot think, my Lord, aur 
fwer'd Ambrofio^ you will fulped I would betray you 
for a Mo$r. Mow or Cbriftian^ faid he, this is not thd 
firft time I have been flxongly inclined to think, your 
Underftanding was more than a little above the fize oif 
9 Gardiner's, ; and that all your Momjh Difcourfes 
^ith Darasca were not to my Advantage, nor ihall 
they end in yours ; as, added he, with a Tone and 
Gefture full of Menace, I will ibon make you fen- 
ifible, to yeur Coft. And having thus faid, he turn'd 
away from h|m in a mighty Pa(fion,'and went back 
to the two charming Friends, who had all this while 
kept the^r affliding Silence : but they no iboner faw 
iiim reh^rning, but they rofe up to retire themfelves, 
and to t;»e more at liberty, eaqh to entertain Her felf 
with her diftinA amorouis Thoughts in her own re- 
fpedive Apartment. Don Rodrigo followed them in 
j|i very difcohtehted Humour, and not at all inclined 
(0 enter into any Converfation with them^ but meet- 
ing his Father, who, thinking they were ftill walk* 
$ng, was come to take a Turn OJf two with them, he 
let the Ladies go, to have the more Freedom with 
liim. Don Radri^o was wiioUy intent upon what had 
t)afs'd that Evenmg, and more efpecially as to Jm^ 
\roJk ; and Doa LewU having chanc'd to mention this 
Servant, as they were paffing among the Beds of 
l^lowers,. and intimating how Well pleas'd he was 
with^the Induftry and SkUl <rf his nevi^ Gardiner; 
he is pbffibly, an(wer'd Dcm Modrig0y with a malicious 
Smile, more skillfull th^were to be wiih'd; and, I 
y-'--\ ' ^ ^ • :•.'••■ <)elieTc; 

V « 

Book! if Qxxztcaxi 4'Al&rache. i$ j 

beliere^ that he both vnderftands and pradHqes mof^ 
th^n one Employment. Don Lfwky who wgs thea 
looking upon lome Flowers, and was not io very at- 
tentive to what his Son fpoke, as to make any great Ror 
ile^on upon it^at fir ft made him no Anfwer j but quick- 
ly after refumiag the Difcpurfe, 'tis true, faid he, he 
wants no Senfe, but he is not therefore a worfe Ser- 
vant^ 9a<| I believe he will make me a very good 
OniB. I v«ry vtmf^ queflion, anfwer'd Don Roirip, 
with, the fame Tquq and Air, his cbmmg hither with 
that Intent, gr, at jeaft, I am perfwaded, that fome 
pthers will be better ferv'd by him than you. How's 
that! laid Don Lewis^ eagerly and innantly inter- 
rupting him j Pray whats the Meaning of what you 
fay ? And for whom would a Servant in my Family 
pretend to employ himfelf, mor$ than formed Tp 
be plain with you Sir, replied the Son, I am of Q- 
pimon, he is more in Daraxas Intereft, than in youq, 
pr^ 9t leail, in thole of fbme one of her Lovers. AH ! 
.my dear Son, cried the Father, laughing, I now 
perceive yoa are really in Love. If I am, replied he, 
. tis not a Love that blinds me, but one that helps me 
.fo dilcern; for I know very well what I lay^ and 
wljat I have fotn. But what is it then that you have 
^en ? laid Don Lev/if^ agai^ interrupting him ; ex- 
plain your.felf. Son, and let me underftand you ; 
for you. ihall find, I am Ppn LiwuJe TadiUa, SpQ of 
Don Gafjaty the Man of all his Contemporaries, of 
all that hv'd within the Age he liv'd in, the leaft apt 
to miftake himfelf, and the moft difficult to be fur- 
pris^'d by others. , A thoufand times has th? World 
aone me the juftice of declaring, that I degenerated 
not from my Anceftors in this Point, no more than in 
many others^ Our Court i$ one or the moft juftly 
peleorated in all Enrofe^ for its Fertility in grave 
fuid wxfe Men ; you may have taken Notice what 
{deputation I have in it, and you fee of whom the 
Ou^en has txv^ Choice, for the Care and Guard of 

1*4 tie life and A^iohi Parti. 

^his illuftripus Moor. In a Word, Son^ I have but 
this more to fay to you ^ I am now turn d of Fifty, 
ind'if, at four ind twenty, they had brought me, 
Jiot meerly ail Arragoniany who are noiic of the moft 
fubtile, but even the moft fliarp and cunning Fellow 
among all the Greeks, ; and if I had had but fo much 
leifure, i% to give him but one firm attentive Leek^ I 
\vould at firft Sight have penetrated the deepeft Rc- 
Cefles of his Soul. J am perfwaded of all theft 
^iTruths, my Lord, replied his Son, more than any 
lM[ah in the World ; but yet i canrioc but thiok, that 
this Man o^ly pretends to ferve you, while he really 
Jntends the Service of another j for* he has ijeen afl 
of a fudden ^ little too ifam'iliar with the Mi^mjh La- 
dy ; and all the little Difcourfes that pafs between 
*thein, and her too vifible Indulgence of his Free- 
dom^^ are no vain Ground of my Conjedures, that 
this is hot thp firft of their Acquaintance, and that-*-^ 
But pray, my grave Obferver, cried the Impatient 
Don Leip^y mterrupting him, and hot endurmg to 
have his Son tJike him for an Ideot and a Property, 
ire not you the ftrangeft Man in the World, to find 
•Fauk with that very thing, whofe only Blame is 
from your felf ? Pray, added he, very warmly, why 
did you perqiit thofe Familiarities J Is this according 
to the Inftrudionyou have had from me i. And areyod 
igncfcant of the Laws and Cuftoms of your Country, 
that a Woman wounds her Honour, by only looking 
itpon a Man, and that 'tis a capital Crime in a Ser- 
vant to lift his Eye towards hh Miftrefe ? And yet 
you are the Man that fuffers the Violation of all tnis, 
and the Prophanation of your Sifter's Honour, by 
being in the fame Company j . diflionouring your felf 
alfoj by Liberties ineonfiftent with all manner of 
Decency, and unworthy of a Man of your Quality. 
Ah! my SonJ putfued h6j deeply SigHing, What 
fort of Conducft is this! Change me but your Treat- 
ment of this Servant, and ufe him lite thi ripft, and 

Book L of Gui^man d^AITara^a 1S5 

I'll fecure you his Fidelity, and anlWer for him^ in 
Point of the Refpe(9: he owes to you, and to all rhit 
any way relate to me. Reft your felf content,' I 
am not a Man to be impos'd upon j and I fliall not 
fail to be perfedly awake, both Night and Day^ in 
order to a thorough Infpedion into all ehat pafles 
where I have to do. Don Rodrig^^ out of Refped to 
his Father, durft not reply j never thelefi, he cont}i- 
hued fully perfwaded, that his Father, how difcerit- 
ing foeyer he thought himielf, was yet deceived i^ 
his good Opinion of this Servant; and h^ took a 
certain fecret fort of Pleaftire to think, that fooner 
or later his Father could not but fee his Error, and 
find he had beeq quite miftaken in him. Juft theq, 
a Servant*, coming to tell Don Rodriga that one dcfir'd 
to fpeak with him, he left his Father to make art eAd 
of his Walk by himfelf. This Lord, who eafily took 
Umbrage at any thing, and wanted none to helb fill 
him with Sufpiciom, as ibon as ever he found riin^- 
felf alone, fell into a, deep mufing, and made a thou- 
land Reflecftions that nll'd him with perplexing 
Thoughts, notwithftanding the outward Appearance 
he had kept in Prefence of nis Son. But to complect 
his meafore of incurable Scruples, hi3 Chief Gardiner, 
>vho had endeavoured to fpeak with him for fbmie 
Days, taking this Opportunity of his being alone, 
game to inform him, that for fome time of late, he 
heard fome fort of Noife almoft every Night in the 
Garden, which made him fufpcd Somebody was 
there ; and that if he dar^d to ftif out of His Eodge, 
writhout his Order, he might have been able to have 
^ven him a better Account. People by Night Jp 
my Garden! replied Hon Lewi, as in a great Afto^ 
mfhment ; and from vvhence can they come, bqc 
out of your Lodge ! He fpoke this vu^ great Ardour 
and Emotion, becaufe his own MSm being preppf. 
iefs'd with what his Son had been tdfebg him abpiit 
jfmhofiB^his Imagitiatioa initantly petiwac^d^ him . 

it6 The Ufe and Mions Part I 

that if any Body came into his Garden^ it could be 
iione but ne j and^ confequently, that the Sufpicions 
of Don Rodrigo were but too well grounded^ fiut 
the Gardiner afToring him^ that there wa3 no manner 
of Fear from his Quarter; and that he would forfeit his 
Life on it^ as weU for Amhrofioy as for his own Manj 
becauie he entrufted no Body^ but lock'd the Door 
always with his own Hand^ and. kept the Key con- 
iiantly in his Pocket ; Don Lewm became amaz'd and 
confounded at it, not being able to form any tolera- 
ble Gueis what it Qould be^ or who ftould have any 
Bufmcls by Night in his Garden. He was in no ap- 

«rehenfK)n that *twas Thieves, the very height of his 
/alls was a fecure Fence from thofe Harpies; and be* 
fides, there was nothing then in his Garden to tempt 
them. As to t>Mf4^as Lovers, he was firmly of Opi- 
nion^ that none of them could poOibly be fo fenfelefs, tp 
expofe themfelves to fb great Danger, only to fee 
her at a Window^ if (he durft venture to expofe her 
felf to be fo feen. In fine, he concluded with hlm- 
felf^ that it muil either be (bme Miftake or Dream of 
his Gardiner, or elfe diat of neceffity it muft pro- 
fceed from within Ms own Walls ; and this laft 
Thought retum'd his Sufpicions ftrong upon jimirofioy 
whatever his Servant was able to alledge. Ac length 
having ask'd him feveral other Queftions to no man- 
jper of pi^rpofej he was tir d with talking fo long to 
jio end with him j and, therefore, only ordered him, 
jchat without mentioning the leaft Word of what had 

§a(s'dj either to his own Mail, or to the new Gar- 
iner, he (hould keep a ftriA Witch that very Nig^tj 
and that if they ch^nc'd to heaif the leaft N<>^^^g^i 
fie ihould fire a Musket, and forthwith Sally oat, 
l>oth he and his Man, complc^tiy arm'd ; and that be 
himldif, with the reft of his Domefiicks, would be 
fure to do fo too.' Don Lnt^kj having thi^s git es bis 
Orders on this: (ide^ went away to cake CaTcdft* 
where j for it would take him up (bme tixf^XQ get 


Book I. 0/ iGuzman 4^Al&r^chc. ^7 

all things in a readinefs for the nughty Feat he was 
contriving, and wjiich he look'd upon as InfaUtUe^ 
and a Mafter-Stratagem. 

If the tv^o Ladies^ Don Ltwisy and Doil R^drif^ 
were full of Trouble, Diforder, and Iniqutetude; Ot^ 
min was not without his Share* His Charader was 
not to be much alarm'd at little Matters ; but he 
thought Don RoJrigos parting Words deferv'd to be 
well confidcr'd, in order to prevent, in good time, 
any HI nnght be deflgn'd him. He was not now to 
learn, that the firft Sufpicion is the Spring of infinite 
morej and efpecially with Perfons Amorous and Jea« 
lous. jyotit RoJrigOy indeed^ did not iufpeft^ him to 
be his^Rival in Chief; but the Sufpicion he had of 
his being the Confident of another, in which he had 
clearly explain d himfelf , was enough to jprotokQ 
him to give him a world of Trouble with (uch ^ Matt 
as his Father, and to bring him at leaft under Ibme 
yexadous, and perhaps dangerous Ex^qikiation. He 
had no Weapon to defend him but one large Poni-« 
fird,and had fcarcely been able to hide that; and diis 
was but 9 poor Defence in a Faniily, where hd 
might be fet upon by ^aboye thirty l>on^fticks. Hp 
had feen Don Rodrigo^ a little after he parted from 
him^ walking in the Garden with his Fattfaar, ancf 
had obfery'd their Difcourfe %o be with Warmth and 
ilLdion.This made him ftill the mojje apprehenfive,and 
he no longer doubted his being the SubjeA of that 
>(^ann Conyerfation. He concluded,' from all his Re^ 
fledibns^ that Prudence required him to he upon hi^ 
puard ; but he believ'd it to be above what Was is^ 
cumbent upon him, to advertife Dar^xa how Things 
iloo4 J and even to inquire of her, whether Don Ro^ 
drigo had let any^ of his Difcontent appei|r , or his 
Jealpuly difcover it felf to heir, that fo he mighr 
thereby be the better able to govern hiq(ielf, and 
that both of them might the better concert theor 
X^e^Tures^ and aft with mutual Harmony firee from' 


^1 W The Life and ASlions Part L 

interfering. It was then too late to write that Night, 
and get an Anfwer; and befides^ a Matter of that 
Moment required a perfonal Converfation. He was 
in no Concern for Dotma Elviras being prefent at 
their Difcourfe, which he knew was not to be avoidt 
ed ; becaufe^ befides the Part it might bQ proper to 
aflign to her in this Affair, (he hid been fo accu- 
ilom'd to their Talking now and then in the Mmi^ 
Tongue, that he Ihould eafily be able to make Pre- 
tences to . colour whatever Secret {hould be needful 
to acquaint his Miftrei^ with. This was what Ozmin 
fix'd ujpon, after all the various Refledions and Strug? 
gles or his Thoughts that Night^for they were neither 
few nor calmj upon this unexpeAed Reverfe of Forr 
tune in his Love-Intrigue within thofe Walks, this 
fudden violent Shocjc giving him no Profped of any 
pleating Tendency. He was more 'than ufuallv Im- 
patient for the approach of the Hour of their Meet- 
ing ; but^ as it often happens^ the more one is uiit 
ealy, the more fliall Accidents fait in to heighten 
ourUneafmefs; he was* riot able to guefi whait ftpuld 
be the meaning of the Noife that he heard made 
over his Head in the Gardiner's Chamber. He had 
fecn ^ him that Night prepare his Musket^ and even 
Charge*it with Ball^ and put it in a Pofture arid Con- 
dition ready for Service, without ftiewing any Curio- 
fity of informing himfelf in the Reafon of it. The 
Man, tho* commonly in Bed by Eight a Qock^ 
and in his dead Sleep by Nine, was yet that Night 
Walking about his Chamber at paft Eleven. All this 
could not but give new SubjeiJls of Refleftiori to O^i- 
min ; for 'twas plain, there was fome Novelty and 
Myftery in band. He was more than once in doubt, 
whether he fhould ftir out that Night ; bpt, at iaft, 
the very lame Reafons that jBhew'd him the lingers 
be had on every fide of him, left he (hould be dtfcover d, 
vjnc'd him alfo of the neceffity 6f fpeaking to Da-, 
mta^ without any further Del^y, -tp inform one ano- 

BookL of Cuzma^i d'Alfiirachd^ iS^ 

ther of all Particuldrs^ and to conclude together up- . 
on what Me^fures fbould be bed for them^ in caie 
they were forcibly feparated. He, had rcfblv*d to ufe 
that Night his ucmoft Care and Precaution^ as well' 
in defcending from his Window with the leaft poIHt. 
ble Noife3 as afterwards in going But Step by Step* 
foftly and flowly . and in taking i further Compa^. 
than he ufually did« that fb he might be lefi liable: 
to fee feen qt heara by the Gardiner, if he watch'd^ 
for him, as it was to be fear'd he did. And, indeed,' 
he fucceeded fo well in every Particular, that he wa^ 
not in the leaft difcover'd on that Quarter j hilt therd 
were other Ambufcades laid for him, beddes that 
of the Gardinei5 i and he was fo furrounded. and. 
watch'd all manner of Ways, that little lefs th!an a. 
fort of Miracle could poffibly pretent his DifcQvery, 
or fecure him an Efcapc. 

But firft, we muft fee a little what becon^es of 
Daraxa, and how Matters pafi within Doors. The 
beauteous Moor hid' taken notice, in the Garden, o| 
a part of Don Rodfigo's Diforders, aind of his. Teverat 
Grievances, and uneafy Poftures and Geftures, whejB^. 
he had found her talking with Otmin 6r ^/iwlro/iq^ 
and when he had at any time rejoin d theni, ateei: 
having left them in Converfation; but all thefe Con^ 
fiderations;, tho' important enough, in their Qonfc: 
quences,* fcarce mov'd hex' at alf. When compar'di 
with the Bitternels of the Reflexions fhe made upon 
the intricate and veiatious Affair of Donna Uhira 
with Don ^ajme. This was^the grand Diflurbance 
of Daraxds Quiet; the Objeft of .all hef an:jdoui 
Thoughts, her endlels infinite Cares and Fears. . Her 
Mind was fo filFd with it, that there was no room 
.left for any other Reflection. She eXpe^ed, with 
great Impatience and Curioflty, to fee whait fort of 
an Interview would be this Night between Donna El-:' 
vira and her fuppos'd^ Lover, after a Converlation fo 
extraordinary as that which (be had had with hini 


1^ the iJfi antf ABiMi \ fertl; 

but the Night before for her Sake. A thousand 
Symptoms made her fufped^ that this amoroas and 
beautiful Sfmiairi was forming^ IcMhe Contritrance 
to furjjriK her. AH that Day (he had oblerv'd her 
in various and unufual Agitations. She had fcarce 
ipoke at all to her; and fbe had taken notice erf" a fort 
of Air of Conftraint and DiflSmulation, in whatereif 
flie had (aid to her, that leem'd to prefage nothing 
of Good or Sincere- Bur, what was moft lurprfzing, 
file came not once into her Apartment all that whole 
Evening, tho* it had been always her confttot Cu- 
fttm to pais almoft the whole Time there, from after 
$upper till the Hour came for going together down 
into the Gallery to meet the luppos'd Don Jaime. 
l>araxa concluded, from all this unufusd Condud, 
that file might expeft fome uncommoa Novelty; 
tod it came often, upon thefe Reflexions, into her 
Thoughts, that Vimna Elytra might poffibly intend to 
^0 that Night without her to meet her LoVer ; and 
this was wh^t fiie moft fujfpe(%ed, tod what would 
tS^ her in the moft fenfible manner.^ But at length 
Ae dilpos'd her Mind to whatever might happen, to 
f)revent too great a Surprife from any thing, atnd fb 
6ipe<fted the Event. It was impoffible to h^e pene^ 
frated more exa<aiy into the Intentions of Doma El- 
i;ira^ than was done by the Jud^ent mad^ of thent 
fcy the beauteous Jtdoor j for diis very thing wis tihe 
Aim stad Intent of ^1 the little amorous Politicks of 
&*tHra that whole D^. Sh^ eagerly atlpir'd at the 
Vifionary Blils of Meeting and Entertaining all alone 
her dear Don ^aynie^ that fo file rtifeht latiate her 
felft unkiterrupted with the Charms o^t his Converfa- 
tion With an the freedom her Heart long*d for, in 
order to found the Depth of his Sentiments, aha to 
toake him a full D^ifcovery of her own. iThis was to 
Sr^ak at once all the Meafures oiOzjmin and tfaraxa; 
but there was alfo preparing elfewhere for her, no 
Uft ObftrudiOns to a?ll her new Contrivances, cveit 


Book I of Guztiiati d^Al^rshche. i^r 

Act fhe fiiould have found in herfuppos*d Don 
Ujm€y a Virtue lefs firm ihan that of Ozjmin. Htt! 
'ather had not loft one Moment^ fince he left the 
Garden, to put* all Things in order of Battle, that is. 
to fay, to mufter up all the Am^s^ Offenfive ana 
Defenfive, that were about the Houfe, as Muskets, 
Masketoons, Carbines^ Piftols, Halberts, Pikes, Par- 
tizans. Back and Breft, Helmets, Targets, Swords,, 
Poniards, and others ^ the greateft part of which had 
been Co long bound over to the Peace,that they were; 
half eat up by Ruft ; but there was now no time to talk 
or think of cleaning them, for the Danger was juft 
at the very Door j at leaft one would have thought 
fo, to have feen the fierce Airs and aftire Motions 
of the vigilant and warlike Don; and that the Ene- 
my was tnat ver^ Night to have made a General At 
fault upon his Houle. For tho* he had never feed 
an Army, much lefs a Battle, in his whcjje Life, ye,^ 
being deicended from Anceftors Who had been in 
Military Commands, he fcom'd to have it faid. He 
knew nothing of the Matter, or was a Man fk to btf 
furpriz'd by an Enemy. All his Fire- Arms amounted 
but to Seventeen or Kghteen, and thofe were diftri- 
buted among the moft daring of his Domefticks^ be- 
caufe the Strefs of Action was expeded froin 
them. Notwithftanding all the Stir and Buffle that 
might well enough have attended all this warlike 
Preparation, he had taken fo particular, a Care, a 
given fo ftrift and pofitive Orders jfo prevent 
manner of Nolle, wherein he placed the main Hope 
of the Succefs 01 his Defign, Secrecy being the Very 
Soul of great Undertsikings, that neither his Son nor 
his Daughter whom he molt feared upon this Occa- 
fion, becaufe of their mutual Eiteem for Daroica^ had 
the leaft Intimation or Sui]>icion of It. To this end 
he only eritrufted two old faithful Servants, coni- 
manding them to fee his Orders Obey'd^ afnd ajl 
Things were made ready for A^on againft Eleven a 


1^ 2 : Jhe Ufe and Mions fart t 

Clocks atld then the reft of his Domefticks were 
brought foftly and privately, one by one, into his 
Chamber, where he gave them feverally their parti- 
4ular Orders^diftributihg^the Arms among them, as 
%t judg'd Qach Man mofl fie to ferve, and fendine 
each to his proper Poft iipon Guard i^ Centinei. 
The greater Part were dil|>bs'd in the lipper Rooms, 
for better Difcovery of others^ and Concealment of 
chemfelves ; and ftri<St Orders to 411 not to fire, nor 
tnSke the leaft Noife, without firft acquainting him 
what they difcover'd, unit Is they heard any .firing 
from others. He made Choice for his t>Wti toft, of a 
Clofet over-againft Darapcas Apartment, as the.mofi: 
fulpefted Place, and which therefore ftobd moft in 
need of his.oWnperfonal Vigilance,he having Co much 
Intereft and Cpnpem in tne Matter, as in his own 
Conceit he* Imagin'd himfelf to have. He was ac- 
companied by the Mafl^r of hb Horfe, an old Do- 
meftick, whofe Bravery was a-kin to that of bis Ma- 
tter, who wifh'd all the Moors far enough ofi^, at 
Granada, t>Y any where, and his Matter and himfelf 
faft afleep in their Beds, rather than be plagii'd with 
all this Buftle, good for nothing but to give them 
abundance of Cold and needlefs FatigiieV But 
there was now no Remedy; and fince Things were as 
they were^ there was neither Honour nor Safety in 
thinking of a Retreat, till they had fecur'd them- 
selves fcbiji the Enemy. Doq Ijwh was in his Night- 
Gown, Night-Cap and Slippery, the Windows open, 
iahd a Datjc I4nth6rn by him, that the Light might 
Jhot difcoVgr him* It was one of thofe fine clear Nignts, 
that are (b common in Sfah, as they are likewSe in 
other hot Cou;itries ; fo that tho' it were Night, yet 
the Stars gave Light enough to difcern the Shadow 
rof a.Man;ac the diftance of Two or threp hundred 
jpaces, wHicph was juft about the £xtent of the Place 
they were watching. Time feems vexy tedious in 
theie fort of Services, and elpecially to tnpfe that arc 


Book 1. of duztxian d'AIfaridhe. 179 

uh-us'd to them ; and the vigilant Don Leviis began 
to think it would never ftrike Twelve, that beiiig the 
Hour, or thereabouts, that by the Gardiner's Report 
the Noife us'd to be in the Garden j but no fooher 
had he heard the Clock ftrike , but he was feiz'd 
with fuch k Throbbinc of Heart, that one would 
have thought he had been the Perfon watch'd for, 
and who hadCauie to be afraid of all this Preparation^ 
This Agitation iufficiently (hewing the Temper of his 
Soul in time of Danger, encreas'd on a fudden with A 
world of Violence, thipking he fkw fome body creepi 
along by the Wall on the fide next the Gallery. Not 
knowing certainly whether he was miftaken or not, 
he pointed where with his Finger, to fliew it to hi* 
Second, but he, whether thro' Fear, or that really his 
Eyes were not fo good, law nothing. But theiy were 
loon put out of doubt J for two of their Centinels 
came to let them know, that diere was a Man ftand-» 
ing below under the Gallery, who talk'd with fomo 
body at one of the Windows, but that there was no 
hearing what was faid. This furpriz'd and heated 
Don Le)i>is in a wonderful manner j • but having the 
Key of that Gallery, among the reft of the Keyd 
which were regularly brought to him at Nine every 
Night , he caus'd inftant Notice to be privately gi- 
ven to all the reft of his People who were thus in 
Arms, and on the Watch, and ordered theiii to draw 
yp near iam- This done, he prefently took the. hardy 
Refblution to begin with, furprizing the Lady in the 
very Fad, that to he might deprive her of all poffi- 
bility of being able to deny or evade the Matter. He 
ordered, for this Expedition, two of his moft refoluter 
Musketeers, and the gallant and faithful Mafter of h^5 
Horfe, who never left him, to attend his Perfr^n . 
and defcending bare-foot , or however ^*;thout 
Shoes, to make no Noife, they came foftly 'aowji to? 
the Door of this Gallery, which theyfr^und ^*?idb 
open J but here they made a ft and, in o^rder to^liar- 

\^4 The Life and Mim Pml. 

ken to what was faid ; when Don Lmh^^ho was ad- 
vanced a little forwarder than my o( thd others^ 
over-heard thefe Words : ^^ I have too much Esteem 
" for yOu, and I fliould be unworthy of yours, if I 
^ abandoft'd my felf to the Weaknefs of making you 
" Unhappy. I know who you are, and what 1 owe 
" to your Birth ; let us not do any thing, of which 
^5 we may Repent as long as we live. 1 am a Gen- 
^f tlemai* of Quality, but want to make my Fortune; 
^^ the Court is the only Place where I can do it ; 
^^ I fli^l there ftand in need of Friends and Support, 
^f and to draw upon me the Hatred of II>op Lewis^ 
^f who isib powerful at Court, would be to deftroy 
^^ my own Pretenfions, and to ruin all my Hopes at 
^^ 04CC. Don Lewis prefently knew the Voice' of the 
pretended Jmbrvjio, whofe Virtue and Prudence he 
could not fiifficiently admire : but he thought it was 
t<5 Dafaxd that this Difcourfe was dire^d, and no- 
thing that he heard could as yet undeceive him* He 
grew impatient to know what this Beauty would 
reply, and he liften'd moft attentively to hear it. 
His Curiofity was prefently gratify'd^ but in another 
manner than he expeded. But, good Heavens ! in- 
to, what a Rage and Aftoniffunent he fell,, when, in- 
ftead of Daraxay he heard the Voice of his Daughter 
thus replying : ^^ Axe thefe, faid Ihe to the Gentle- 
'^ man, the Reafbnings of an amorous Heart ? And 
does your Paflion for me, infpire you nothing war- 
mer than thefe cold Difcourfes ? Are you come 
^^ hither thro' fb many Difficulties, and even in Daa^ 
" ger of your Life, only to teach me my Duty, and 
the Conduca I ought to obferve ? Oh ! extream 
Weakneft ! How have I been miftahen in you ! I 
thought to. find in you, a Man that deftrv'd to be 
belov'd, or who, at leaft, knew what Love meant. 
Alas 1 to what, am I reduc'd ! to pity you> and to 
repent my own unhappy Choice I .What ! fiiall I 
^ have more Courage and Refohition. than you ! 

'' ShjtU 






Book I of Guzman d^AIfaractie.^ t^ ^ 

Shall I deipiie all Things for your fake^ and will 
you do nothing for me ? The confideration of ma- 
Icing your Fortune can hare the Power of tooling 
^^ you, Whcin I place all my Fortune in yoa. What 
'''' need you fdar my Father? Is there no other Court 
in the World but ours j and fmce there is, why 
may not a Man of your extraordinary WorAj 
hopt w find elfeurhere an agreeable and fufficient 
^^ Eftablifliment ? And, for my part, I had a thou- 
" fand times rather live a contented Shepherdefs in 
'^ a Cottage, than be miferable in the moft magni- 
^^ ficent Palace. But to whom am I fpeaking ? — She 
was going oii thus, when the violence of her Pat 
fkm made ter break into a Torrent of Tears, that 
fhe was now no longer able to reftrain. Juft then a 
Musket was difcharg'd ; it came from that Quartet 
where the Gardiner's Lodge was, and confequcntly 
had not been occafion'd by Amhojioy but it was in- 
ftantly followed by Ten or Twelve more. The Tears 
and Lore oiDotH^a Ehira gave Place to the fuddain 
and violent Emotions of a more tumultuous Paflion, 
that of Fear. She was fo feiz'd with it, at the Noife 
of lb many IVluskets firing all round her, that at 
firft Ihe fcarce knew where (he was, or what Ibe was 
doing. In a little time recovering , though but 
very imperfe<aiy, flie betook her felf to flight, not 
fo much as remembring to Ihut the Window ^ bur 
juft as Ihe ^as running out of th6 Gallery, her Fa- 
ther, who had way-laid her in the Paffage, catching 
her all of a fuddain by the Arm : ^^ Is it thus, faid he, 
" to l^r^ wretched Girl, that you diflionour your Fa- 
ther, and the lUuftrious Blo«od from whence you 
are defcended ? Poor Donna Elvira^ already ex- 
ceedin^y frighted by the Noife of fo many Muskets, ^ 
and her whme frame of Mind (haken and diforder'a 
in an exceffi^e* manner, by the heart-breaking Con- 
rerfation iSie juft had with her too much lov'd Don 
y^jme^ found h€r fglf ijuite over-power'd with fcr 


1^6 / The Life and ASHdns , Partt 

many violent Shocks at once ; this new unexpe&ed 
Stop^ and above all, her Father's Voice, that, un- 
able to refill, (he fwoon d away in his Arms. Don 
Lewis perceiv'd it by the mournful Shriek Ihe gave> 
and by her remaining quite ftill and motionleft ; 
but opening his Dark-Lanthorn to inform himfelf 
more certainly, he found her in a^ Condition, that 
in ipice of all nis Anger, as he was naturally a tender 
Father, and above all, <o . this Dadghter, he was ex- 
treamly touch'd with Compaffion at it : and not be- 
ing able to bear the Sight without diicovering too 
much relenting^ he kft her to th^ Care of the Ma- 
fter of his Horie, and went away to reyenge himfelf^ 
and make his Refentment fall upon him who had 
been the Source of all this Mifchief. It was no lon'^ 
ger Daraxa who had thus wrong'd his Houie, for he 
could cafily have wafli'd away that Stain ; but Was- 
his own Daughter, which was a mortal Stab to his 
Reputation, and to the Honour of ajl his Family ; 
and therefore he no longer confider d either the Vir- 
tue or Prudence of this pretended AmhrQjw^ wha 
now, in his Efteem, was only come to bang Dif- 
grace and Infamy upon his Name, and fill his Family 
with fo cruel and extream Diforder. He affembled 
all his Men of Arms, and having tuck'd up his 
Gown, he call'd for his Armour, and put it on over 
his Clothes. But as he was arming himfelf, his whole 
Body trembled j perceiving which, and obferving 
that it quite furpriz'd his People, the Fear he had of 
^iv ing them., by that Accident, an ill Opinion of his 
tourage, made him have Reccurfe, as he was well 
read in Hiftory, to a famous Example that gave a 
handlbme Turn and Colour to this fort of Weaknels ; 
and added. That he had this natural Emotion m 
common with the famous King Don Pedro^ Gxmsuxid 
the Cruel^ who when he put on his Armour upon a 
Day of Battel, his whole Body trembled fb very 
much, that 'twas fcarce poffible to wm him j upon 


Book L tf Guzman d'Alfarachei 1^7 

which Occafion he was wont to lay. That if his Body- 
knew w how many and great Dangers his Valour 
was going to expofc it, 'twould do more than 
tremble, 'twould fweat Drops of Blood. You 
fliall fee, added he to this Scrap of Hiftory, 
that 'tis Rage, not Fear, makes me tremble ; for the 
infamous Wretch fliall perifli j his Death is refolv'd, 
and irretrievable. Finding himfelf now ready, and 
in good order, that is to fey, his Helmet upon his 
Night-Cap, his Back and ISreaft upon his Night- 
Gown, a Target upon his Left Arm, a long Pike in his 
Right Hand, and both Hands arm'd with Gantlets. 'Tis 
true, he was ftill in his Slippers, which was not quite 
the Equipage of a Man arm'd from Head to Foot ; 
but it would have took up Time to put on Shoes^ and 
arm his Feet j and there was now no Time to fpare, 
AU being thus readv, and his. Men drawn up in 
Battalia, he pofted nimfelf in the Rear, and com- 
manded the great Garden-Door to be fet open, from 
whence they defil'd by three and three, firft the Fire^ 
Arms, and then the Halberdeers and Pikes. There 
was nothing wanting except a Drum j but the Noife 
they now made, fupplied that Want. The Gardiner 
and hi$ Man prefently join'd them'^ which was a 
good Re-inforcement, tho' neither^ Man nor Mafter 
was over-valiant, as you may guels; for they told 
their General, that they had feen the Enemy, and 
that moft certainly there were two of them, ' That 
infonjiation aftonifli'd Don ttwisy who ask'd him 
why he did not fire upon them. He reply'd, he 
durft not do it without his Order. Don Lewis 
having informed himfelf which way they went, cau- 
fed his Brigade to march the faipe way, well perfwa- 
ded in himfelf, it was impoffible they could cfcape, 
out of an inclofure furrounded by Walls of that 
prodigious height. And yet he was mightily mifta- 
ken^ for the gpod Genius of O&^y^iir had taken Care 
of lum, ^nd be was already fecure from Danger, and 

P 5 feir 

i^ The Life mid A&ljoi(% iBirtX 

far enough from all the Rage and Malice (^ Don 
ttwis. This disguis'd Lover being fully pofiefs'd^ 
after all that had pais'd^ and what he had fee^n and 
obferv'd^ that there was fome Defign in Hand^ and 
that he was aim'd at by it^ no fooner heard the Dit 
fcharge of fb many Muskets, but he prefently conV 
eluded 'twas Pon RodrigOy who having caus'd him to 
be watch'd, had done all this. He was fenfible, by 
the many Musket-(hot he had heard, that lus Enemies 
muft needs opprefs him by their Numbers, he having 
BO Succour to expeft, nor any thing bijt his Ponyard 
to defend him : He therefore quick^ concluded, that 
)ie had nothing to do but to think of Retreating a$ 
well as he could ; fo that Donna Ehira had no fooner 
left him, but, ihifting for himfelf, he whipt through 
fL Walk, with intention to get into a little Ground- 
Room, where the Gardiner's Tools were kept, which 
Place feem'd to him the fitteft to fecure and defend 
him a^while, and to fell his Life at the belt Rate 
if he were driven to that Extremity, and found no- 
thing but his Life would fatisfy. But he was not got 
^o the middle of the Garden, when a Man that fol- 
lowed him, and began to get very nigh him, obUg'd 
him to make a fiand and face him, to fee what he would 
be at; and to make him feniible, if Caufe required it, 
he was npt retiring from a fmgle Perfon, He therefore 
ftood ftill, and then tum'd and fac'd him, and with 
his Ponyard in his Hand, he waited his Approach, in 
prder to fall upon him, if he were arm'd with Shot, 
and made any Motion towards firing upon hin^. But 
this Man was fcarce -well got within Piftol Shot of 
him, but he call'd to him in a friendly and obliging 
manner; My Lord Don Jayme^ if you ftand in any 
peed of my Affiftance and Service, I am perfe<^ly 
^iippVd to ferve you heartily ; you have no more to 
4o, but to honbut me with your Commands. I ve- 
rily believe, yoi^r J.ife is fought for j and that, in ^ 
*«7 f?Vy ?49m«*ts^ you will 199 a T«)0|> €>f JRafcals. 

Book L vf Guzman d^AIfarache. 49^ 

all arm'd^ fklly out upon you, who, no doubt, will 
bafely murder you, without any Regard to Virtue or 
Humanity. It wiU be no very hard Matter, to ima- 
gine the agreeable Surprife of Ot^min, at fo unex- 
peAed generous and obliging an Addrefs^ ; not being 
able to guefs at. this unknown Perfbn, neither who 
or what he was, nor how he came thither ; nor, in 
fine, how he could come to know that he was call'd 
Don Jajffne. He thought, indeed, that his Volcie 
was not wholly unknown to hirti j and he could plain- 
ly difcern, tho' it were Night, that he had neither 
the Mien, nor Manner, nor Habit, either of a Ser- 
vant, or of any of the Family j and that he was 
arm*d with two Piftols at his Girdle, and had a Sword 
for Service under his Arm. All this plainly (hew'd 
fome form'd De(ign, and that this unknown P'erfon 
had taken his Precautions. Thefe Thoughts and Re- 
fleiftions, which you know move more fwiftly in the 
Mind than they can be related, being pafs^a before 
him in a mental Scene, he confider'd a few Mo- 
ments without replying, till he was come up very 
near him j and then in return to fb obliging Lan- 
guage, and fb generous an Offer, I am not able to 
gueS, (aid he to the unknown Gentleman, from 
whence fb unexpeAed a Happinefs as this can pofli-- 
Wy defcend upon me; but whoever you are, yoti 
cannot but be a Gentleman of uncommon Worth and 
Noblenefi. And fince *tis only I that am fought for, 
if you hate no other Bufinefs here, I ask you no 
Affiftance, nor other Favour, but to lend me fome 
Aims J beeging you, at the fame time, to retire from 
henge, or fome way to fecure your own Perfdn,for I can 
by no Meians endure to think, that fo gallant and ge- 
nerous a Man, asyou mufi: needs be, fhould facri^ce 
his Life for my fake. As for my Arms^ replied the 
unknown Perton, they are at your Service; There 
my Lord, there's one of my Piftols, and you mavr 
depend upon't j but Lam not that fere of i M^n,- «*- 

4 ded 

9P0 The tife and Anions Fart L 

ded he, in a moft. generous, hearty and obliging 
manner, to leave a Gentleman of your Merit to be 
afTaflinated, and refiife to {hare the Danger with him. 
If therefore, ourfued he, you would have me retire, 
you muft relolve to go with me. ' I believe, replied 
Ozminy 'twould be the iafeft and fliorteft Way j for*tis 
to no purpofe to fpend our Courage upon Brutes and 
Footmen, unlefs we were conftrain*cl to diipute our 
Lives with them. But the worft pn't is, for ought I 
know, we muft be forced to ftand the Brunt, tor I 
fee no way to get off. I have a Salve for this Sore, 
how defperate loever it feems, replied the unknown 
CavaUer j and therefore, without lofing more time, 
let us be going ; and thus I lead you the Way. They 
haften'd along, and quickly came to that part of the 
Garden-Wall that had been lately rebuilt ; a Place 
that Ozmin well remember d, and where he now faw 
a good long Ladder, ftandmg eredred to the height 
pi the Wall. And here they would needs pals Ibme 
frefli Compliments, tho* a little unfeafonably, for 
jthey cpuld plainly hear the March of Don Ltu/iss 
Brigade. But therefore they did it; each contending 
for the Honours of being laft to aicend the Ladder, 
and ftand the Danger of the Garden, tho' after all, 
the Difference was not great. But at laft the Stran- 
ger was forged to give way to Ozmin or Don Jaywey 
becaufc the Affair chiefly refpeded him. They had 
time enough, and to Q]tare, not only to afcend the 
Ladder, but to draw it over ,the Wall j becaufe the 
pomeftick Patrole, that was in queft of them, had 
taken their March a quite different way from the 
Place of their Efcape j and they withdrew the Lad- 
der, to deprive them of the fatisfaftion of knowing 
by what means they had thus happily fav^d themlelvcs. 
There wgs another Ladder flood ready planted on 
the other fide the Wall, and five or fix lufty Footmen 
attending below, all arm'd, who were upon the 
Watch i \)y whiQh^ Oz^m found he had to do with a 


•If • 

k I if Guzthan d'Alfar^che. sot 

at the fame time^ as an addition of Favour^ that he 
would pleafe to let him know^ to whom he ftood in^ 
debted for fo fenfible an Obligation. Buttheunr 
known Gentleman anfwer d, that he fhould think hfc 
had done but half his Duty, if he fuffer'd him to go 
alone to his Lodgings j or, indeed, if be (hould leave 
him before this Matter was quite ended ; that being 
a Stranger, he might not, perhaps, fo well know what 
fort of Man Don Lewis was, and that he had need to 
make ufe of all poffible Precautions to guard himielf 
againft him : That he therefore made nim an Offer 
of his Houfe, where he might rely upon being ie^ 
cure from all Infults and Surprifes, even tho'^it IhouW 
be known he was there ; but that if he would not do 
him that Honour to accept of his Houie as his own^ 
yet that, at leaf):, he would not refufe him the Om^ 
tentment of refiding there with him, and affbrdii^ 
him his Company, till he could fee what was like tO 
be the IlTue of this Affair, and after what manner 
Don Lewis and his Son would refent and puirfue it 
Ozminy charm'd with a Procedure fo extreamly nobl€^ 
and io very uncommon, made him all the grateful 
Acknowledgments that a fenfible and generous Hearty 
warm'd with jufl: Efleem arifing from fo great Obli- 
gations, could infpire him with i but he could not 
defend himfelf from accepting, at lafl, the repeated 
Offers of his Houfe j whither he confented to retire, 
finding, by his earnefl perfifting in it, that he exr 
treamly defir'd it, and would take it unkindly, if de- 
nied. He therefore acquiefced in it, and they began 
to walk apace, both to avoid being known, and 
dogg'd by any of Don Lewis s People, and likewif^ 
to gratify their mutual Impatience of .feeing each o- 
thers Faces in the Light j it not having been poflible, 
tho' the Nijght was^ clear enough, tp diftin|;uUh wejl 


ttd ft The Life and Anions Part I 

die Air tnd Features of a Face. Bat as Ozmn 
idiought he knew the Voice of this Cav^ier^ fo he 
)Skewiie fancy'd he remember d Ozmn's; and his 
Curiofity was the greater^ as not having taken its 
Birih juft upon this Meetings but being of an ear- 
lier Date^ had been augmented by this Sound of his 
Voice^ which he believ'd was not unknown to him. But 
how extream was the Surprize of both thefe Gentle- 
men^ when they got to the Place to whidi they 
were going; and when two Footmen coming to light 
them at their entring the Houfe^ with each two 
'Flambeaux^ gave them an opportunity of gratifying 
their mutual earneft Defire or beholding each odiers 
Faces: What an Aftonifhment was there I fay^in both ! 
but chiefly in the Mafter of the Houfe! who yielding 
firft of the two to the Traniborts of his Heart ; By 
'What good Influence^ cried he out^ embracing hitu^ 
4tb I this Night meet a Man to whom I owe my Life^ 
^md whom I fo ardently wifli'd to find ! For my Ca- 
Yalier^addcd he,with an extream Joy^which fuificienc- 
«hr appeared in his whole Deportment, 'twas you that 
trtd me, in the late BulL-Feaft, from the Fury of a 
Bull, which, but for your timely Succour, I could 
not have efcap'd. That little Service, my Lord, re- 
iplied Ozmin very modeftly and finiling, has been 
rWell requited, by what you have juft done for me, 
ih retrieving me from a Danger, wherein, perhaps, 
more than my Life lay at Stake. If I have render'd 
Vou any Service in that, replied Don JJmfoy it has 
been without running any Rifque on my part, and I 
owe k all to Chance and my good Fortune ,* whereas 
* you entirely exposed your Life for me, after I had 
;iven you to much Caufe to treat me in a quite dif- 
trtnt manner j but 'tis only for Cavaliers of your 
iekalted Noblenels, to pufh their Generofity to fo 
^eat a height. This obliging Contefl of Services 
dnd ' Obligations continued for feme time, till they 
iwefie up into Pon 4l9nf9S Apartment^ while another 
...i was 

Book I. ofGuztmn d^Alfaiache. 203 

wai preparing for Don jF^we. But they pals'd the 
greateil part of the remainder of the Night infconver* 
iing together ; Don Jlonfo^ in relating to Us new 
Guefl all that he knevi^ of his Affairs with Dimna El* 
virsj with whom he believ'd him to be really in 
Love i and that it was Curiofity, and a Deftre that 
he had to mak;e an Acquaintance with him^ that had 
engag'd him to enter the Garden at that Hour. And 
Osyww imparted to him, all that he could tell him of 
that Intrigue^ without turning it too much to his own 
Advantage, for fev. of injuring the Reputation of 
Doma lidvira. Don Alonfo alio made him a Confi- 
dence of his Paffion for Daraxa j which had been the 
principal Motive of his defiring to make an Acquain- 
tance with him. Ozmlu, tho' he had no great Talent 
in an eafy difguifmg his Thoughts, yet judged ft 
concemM him raoft nearly upon this Occanon to do 
it, and to continue the afflim'd Fiditious Name and 
Perfon of Don Jayme Vtws, Day havinjg at laft fiir- 
priz'd them in the Courfe of fo agreeabte a Conver* 
lation, wherein neither of them were at all tir'dj 
Bon Ahnfo believed, that he ought not to trelpais 
too far upon the Complaifance of Don Jajme j and 
having made him fome Compliments upon that Sub- 
jeft, he rofe up to wait on him to the Appartment 
that had been particularly prepared for him j being 
the moft pommodious and magnificent in the whole 
Houfe. He left him here to his Repofe till about 
Noon: Having heard he was got up,and was drefflng 
himf^lf, he went tp him, that they might Dine toge- 
ther iq private, as they had thought it was moft pro- 
per. Ozjnin had already fent to look for Orviedo, to 
let him know all that had happened, and to be fur? 
nifii'd with a Habit more fuitable to the Honours he 
receiv'd from Don Alonfo, than thofe he had brought 
with him from the Garden of Don Lems. BeforQ 
that Day was over, the whole City was fiill of the 
Adventure of Donjajntt with D&ffjf^ Ehlra ; and 



404 The Life and ASlions Part L 

this U a Misfortune^ to whiph all Great Houfes^ that 
are fill'd with numerous Domefticks^ are liable ; no* 
thing can be Secret, if of any Moment i no fooner is 
any tning of Importance tranladed, or doth happen in 
fuch Families, but 'tis prefently divulc'd, and made a 
;Town-talk. This Story was told a thoufand feveral 
ways, but all to the Difadvantage of Donna Ehira ; 
at which, Don Jajme was very ienfibly touched. In 
a very few Days, the Friendfliio between thefe two 
Cavaliers was become the moii firm and mpft en- 
dearing in the World. For Don Alonfo made daily 
Dilcoveries of noble Qualities in his new Friend ; 
and pofieiCng, on his part. Qualities highly valuable, 
and worthy the Efteem of a Man, who, like Ozmin, 
both knew what Merit was, and poffefs*d jt and ho- 
oour'd it, both of them were equally fatisfied. Thus 
neither could refufe his Friendfliip to the other, 
where he faw it courted, honour'd, valued ahd de- 
ferv'd. Both of them long'd to know how Matters 
went at Don Lewis\ and to have more particular 
News concerning Donna Elvira^ than what the Pu- 
blickTalk afforded ^ for, accprding to thofe Rumours, 
Ihe was Ihut up in a Chamber, where none but her 
Father had liberty to fee her, befides one Woman 
that attended her. There was none but ClarkiacovXdi 
poffibly give thpm any Information ^ nor fhe,but with 
a world of Difficulty j it was become fo very hard to 
ileal put, fo as to get fo far as to Don Alonjos. For 
the Servants had now no manner of Liberty to ftir a- 
broad.; and Clarkia was obferv'd more nearly than 
the reu, becaufe of the Confidence her Miftrels was 
known to reppfo in her. But however, fhe did now 
and then make a hard fliift to get fo far as to Don A- 
Jonfos. And fhe it was that inforni d them of all that 
pafs'd that Night i and the . Rage and Delpair of 
I)on I^'wisy for having mifs'd his Aim, and not taking 
the Counterfeit Amhrofio^ whom he had refolv'dto dii- 
jpatf h, ha^ h<5 g^t him j but that it could never be 
\ ' • * com- 


Book I. of Guzman d'Alfarache^ 205; 

comprehended how he got away : That lo or 12 Men, 
had been employed to fearch after him in the City> 
and that he was ftill fought for j but ^twas believ d . 
he was retired : That Donna Elvira had been fick to 
extremity ^ and that Daraxa had alfo been much in- 
difpos'd^ whether from' the l^art (he took in her^ 
Friend's Afflidion, or from the Fright at the Noife ^ 
of fo many Muskets, and the Hurry and Buftle of that! 
diforderly Night, wherein none of the Family had. 
flept or refted : That Don Lewis had conceiy'd fo.' 
much Grief and Vexation at this whole Matter, that;, 
he had ,never been abroad fince, nor would fee or' 
fpeak with any Body ; and that 'twas faid, he wbuldr 
go into the Country for a Month, to give Time for all 
thefo Rumours to blow over. Thefe two Lovers ha-; 
ving thus been informed of all thefe Particulars, it 
fervd them for matter of Converfation and Mirth j^ 
efpecially Don Almfoy who had no Kindnels for the! 
Family of Don Leivlsy and therefore only diverted* 
himfelf with the Diforders of it, and turn d them in-' 
to Ridicule and Banter, As for Don Jay me y who^ 
was now out of the reach of Don Lewis s Rage^,^ 
Don Aknfo advis'd him to make ufe of this Maid^ 
and write, by her, to Dmna Elvira ^ to comfort her a^ 
little in her Jtfflidion. 'Tis true, indeed, that Cla-, 
ricia had no permiflion to fee Donna Ehlra^ any more ^ 
than others had j but as Daraxa^ to whom Don Lewisl 
had not dar'd to forbid the going into his Daughters^ 
Chamber, was almofl: always with her, it was Very^ 
likely (he would make no Scruple to give fuch a Bil- 
let to her Friend, or rather that fhe would take Plea- 
fure in doing it. Don Jayme'^ as you may well guefs^ 
was not over-hard to be perfwaded by his Friend ; 
fo leaving him to difbourfe with Claricia as much as he; 
plea^'d, he retir d to write, not to Donna Elvira^ biit'^ 
to Daraxa her felf, a very long Letter in the Moorljfi 
Tongue, to give her an Account of all that had hap^ 
pen'd to him on the Night of the Musket-alarm!' 

.. - Daraxa 

ao€. The Life and ABms Part L 

Daraxa receiv'd this Letter with an extream Joy j for 
(he knew nothing, till then, of what was become of 
her dear Lover ; and ihe was in a continual and 
mortal Apprehenfion, left he fhould been wounded 
by the many Musket-fhots that, as fhe thought, were 
fif'd at him. She had not begun to be in any Heakh 
of Body, or Quiet of Mind, till the Receipt of this wel- 
come Letter i and fhe made ufe of the fame Pretext, and 
the lame Conveyance, to fend him her Anlwer ; Claricia 
having profFer'd her felf to cat-ry it, that (he might 
j^nder her Lady an agreeable Service. Some C^ys 
after, Don Lewis, as this Maid had told them^ went 
with all his Family to his Country-Seat, about a 
League frdm ScuiL and it was not certainly known 
how long he would continue there. This put Oximin 
out of Humour J for by this Abfencc, he faw^himfelf 
deprived of Claricia s Negociation, which was to hini 
of exceeding Ufe. But Don Jlonfo foon found out 
an Expedient to content him ; for he told him, that 
he had a Houfe within a quarter of a League of 
Don Lewis s ; that they had nothing to do but to go 
thither ; and that they might eafily there firid Means 
to have a more fpeedy and certain Account of their 
Miflrefies, than they could do in Town ; and ei^en 
tb have Accefs to them, and be in frequent Conyer* 
lation with them. Don Jayme exceedingly approved 
this Defign, and the very next Day they went thi- 
ther with Orviedo, attended only by two Footmbn, 
to make the lefc Noife. They poned themfelves in 
this Houfe, one of the fineft in all thole f^arts. It 
only remained to let Claricia know they were there, 
and earneftly defu^d to foeak with her. Don Ahnfi 

Suickly found out d Peafant fit for this MelTage j for 
ley are admirable Fellows in this Country. Rit Hot 
to give this Maid the Trouble of coming fo far^ he 
caus'd her to be appointed to come to a beautiful 
Groye that lay within Musket-fRot of Don Lewis s 
Home, where they met together] Don Ahnfi »d 


Boole L (/ Guzman d'Alfaiachei S07 

Don y^i^ being difguis'd Uke Pe^ia&ts. TheCoiK 
verfacion by Letters was thus reviv'd ; but this was 
but an indifferent SatisfaAicm for our two CavalierSj, 
efpecially for Don Aknfoy who had icarce any Shar$- 
in that way of Converfing^ but juft what his Friend^ 
wa$ pleas a to admit him to by way of GenerofityVr 
or rather of Amufement. Don Alimjo therefore mpft 
earneftly prefs'd ClarkU to prevail with the twa fair 
Ladi^Sj to admit them to a Imall Interview and per^ 
fonal Converfation with them ; for Dmna Ehirm 
now began to walk about^ and Daraota was in per£^ 
Health. But how was it ppffible wtliL two fuch 
eternally watchful Guardians^ as Dod^j^ewis and Don 
iodrigOy who had been once already catch'd^ and the 
Wound was fiiU fb freih i It happened nevertheleis 
one Day^ that Don Rodrigo being gone to Sevily his; 
Fath^ was obliged upon occafion of an Affair ^ 
Confequ^ce^ that was jufl fallen out^ in an Eflater 
that he had about a League from the Place of his thes 
Refide^ce^ to get a Horfe-back forthwith, in ordet; 
to be there vvith all poffible fpeed to give his Or- 
ders about it^becaufe the Nature of the Thing pceife'djL 
^d very mpch required his immediate Prefeoce. H« 
madias little Noifq and Talk dbout his Jouraoey as 
poffibly he could, and told his People, as he went 
^way^ that he fhould return in half an Hour ; but as 
it was veiy well known in the Family what he went 
^bout^ ^od to what PUce, 'twas thought impofltble 
for him to return, whatever Dif^tch he, made, ia 
lefs than three Hours, Our two Beauties^ axul puir 
Brace of Lovers, cpuld: f<;arce wijSi for a fairer Op^ 
portunity, and they all were rcfoly'd tp lay hold of in 
Claricis manag'd the Matter with her u(ual Dexteri^ 
ty. The two Lovers difguis'd themfelves like ordi-f 
'lary j^eafants for their better Concealment, as was 
agreed among all Parties, and, without lofihg time^ 
away they went to the Grove that I- kjcely mentiQUr 
€d. Don Jame. a$ moft imim.ate with the, Ladie% 

' walk'd 

i<J» - ^-The Life and A^hns • !?art I. 

walk'd out towards Don Leu;»s Houfe, to fee whe- 
ther they rauft go from the Grove thither, or that 
the Ladies would venture out^ but he met them hard 
by coming up towards the Grove to walk there with 
them i and that the Frolick might be more uniform, 
they had taken the Habit of Shepherdeffes as near as 
they could imitate them, • and were only attended by 
flieir two Confidents, Layda and Ctaricia. There is 
nothing more delightful and entertaining than thele 
ibrt otftolen Meetings, but then they are no left 
Slippery and Dangerous. This prefent Meeting be- 
^an with att eJM Excefs of Joy on all Sides, ftrft to 
fee one anotM^ and then at the beholding their 
feveral Difguiies, laughing and plcafantly jefting 
at them. The Converlation was at firft General, 
JUid yet Charming between thefe four extraordinary 
Pcrfons, who were all in Raptures of Pleafure, at 
being once more fo near to what they fo much lov'd. 
They were beginning to defcend into the Walks of 
this Grove, which were wonderfully plealant and 
agreeable, when they perceived thro' the Trees two 
real Peafants coming along that way, whom they 
took to be^ fome that belong'd to the Town adjoin* 
ing'to Don Lems's Honk ^ as indeed they were. 
They could not imagine what Bufinels they had 
thejpe, for they- were not allow'd the freedom of that 
Place J ^however they thought proper not to take 
any notice, but 4et tfiem pals by j yet as they came 
on ftrait towards them, • whether thro' Curiofity, or 
fome other Reafon unknown to them, the Ladies, to 
prevent their Faces frpm being feen, which might 
nave betray'd them, flood playing with their Fingers 
upon the Trees , and Don Jayme before them with 
his Back towards the Peafants: Don Alonfo^vvho ftay'd 
fome Paces behind, being as little willing to be feen, 
ftood in a like Poll, pretending to beamufmg him- 
felf With fome fort or Trifle, when all of a Tucjden 
he fdc himfelf faluted with a good ibuad Blow of a 

*% Cudgel, 

BookL of Guzman d^Alfarachc. 2 op 

Cudgel that almoft fturfd him; Don Jayme having 
heard the Blow, turn'd about in a Momentj and very 
luckily too, for there was the fame Sauce preparing 
for him j but as he was inimitably adive and nimble, 
he avoided part of the Blow, fo that it Aid down his 
Back without much Hurt. One may guefi what Re-» 
turn was fit for fuch a Salutation : His StaflF was notf 
of the bigneft of the AiTailants, but the Strength 
and Vigour of his Arm was at leaft equal to that of 
the ftrongeft Peafant ; fo tnat with one back Stroke^ 
taking him^^uft in the Face, he broke half his Jaw^ 
and laid him flat upon the Ground. His Stick was 
broken by the violence of the Blow, but heprefent- 
ly feiz'd the thundring Cudgel of the Raskally Pea- 
iant, whom he had handled fo handfomly, and ran 
to die Affiftance of Don Ahmfoy who ftood in great 
need of it, for he was hard put to it by his Antago- 
nift, and reduc'd to Fight and Retreat. But this 
Fellow, having feen his Com-Rogue ftruck down at 
once, thought 'twas in vain to ftay with fb dangerouj 
an Enemy, and therefore ran away to the Town as har4 
as he could drive. There he put them all in Alarm i tel- 
ling.them his Comrade was kiU'd, tho', in Truth, h^ 
was but wounded. Don Jayme would not give him- 
lelf the trouble to purfue him, for fear of abandoning 
the Ladies and Don Alonfo^ whole Condition he could 
not tell ; but the firft Blow that was given him had 
only amaz*d him, tho' it were a very violent one, the 
Tree, againft which he was leaning, having broken 
the force of it. He had received another Blow upon 
his Arm diat was more troublefbme to him j but the 
"whole was no great Matter, and they had ftil only 
turn'd it into Raillery, but for the Confequence, bc- 
caufe of the Ladies ^ who feeing all this Confufion, 
had very prudently betaken themfelves to Flight, ex- 
treamly alarm'd, and mightily concern d for what 
might be the Iffue of it- But the Matter refted not 
here^ for as our two Cavaliers were reafbmng the 

P Cafe^ 

210 The Life and AMicm tsatt 

Ca(e^ and conndering whether they ihotild make any 
fiircher Attempt for that time to lee Ac Ladies^ or 
Ibotxld return Home, they were fuddenly attacked by 
diree Ruffians from the Town, who came running 
upon them with drawn Sworck The firil of them^ 
who was the briskeft and likeliefl: Fellow of the three^ 
baftening mpre forward than the reft to fbew hi^ 
Courage, chanc'd to light upon Ozmin^ whom he 
thought to fpit with the lirft Stroke, and he (~ 
wound him in the Hand, but he quickly fb^o^ 
Requital ; for Ozmin returned him iudi % ^lo^ vfon 
the Head with the Peaiant's heavy Trundiepn. tb»c 
he laid him flat at once ; and his Sword, which was 
of a good handiome length, ftood our C?valier in 
great ftead aeaanft the two others, who came jpjce- 
fently up wim him ; but being feconded by Dop ^- 
lanfoy who tho' he had nothing but a Sticky vet J^d 
on thick, and drub'd them to the purpofe^ mty ^b-- 

f ether far over-match'd them ; and having wouculed 
oth of them, they drove them, too warmly, to the 
yery Town s-end. The Town was all up m Arms, 
upon occafion of the Fellow that had been kili'd^ 
who happen'd to be the Son of the Town-Bailiff : By 
this Rabble of Clod-Pates they were inftaqtly iur^ 
rounded, and charg'd by z or ;oo of them arm'df 
jwith Cudgels, Iron-pointed Clubs, ibme few fire-- 
Arms for a Shew, for there was not an Ounce of 
Powder in the whole Town, feveral old Swords, 
Flails and Soits. This ill appointed Crowd wer^yet^ 
by their Numbers a^d Violence, acceding trouble^ 
feme to our two young Hero's ; and efpecially wkh 
their long Poles and Quarter-Staves, more than aU 
the reft ^ for befides the Blows they gave with them 
at a diftance, they were thrown between th^ i*^tS^, 
by which they were frequendy put to the ftumhie 5 
.fometimes ready to tumble backwards, and fometimes 
upon their Nofes ; and, at laft, Ox^in was a<^uaUy 
thus thrown down^ as he was getting forward to 


• • • 

kl. 4 Guzman d^Al&rache. an 

iktcoor Don Akafoj to whom h« had given a (econd 
Swoixi he had ieiz'd^ hat which coold not prevent his 
befaig tak»9 and himietf alfo fbon after^ by Qccafioa 
of one of dieie Poles unluckily thrown between his 
Legs^ as I told you. It threw him down^ and th0 
whole Mob taku^ the Advantage^ fell prefendy 
upon him^ and iecur^d him ; for as he appeared 
the moft adive knd animated aeainft them^ thc]f 
chk^ aim'd at him. There had been \ Men ltiU'4 
out^right^. and all laid to him^ befides lo pr x% thtt 
were very much wounded ; and Qod know^ how h^ 
had been us'dby that Kennel of forious Hounds in 
die Ra^e they were in^ and havinft now gof him 
utto their Clutches^ if happily fot mm. and cbi^^; 
for Don Mm^ik who veas all dver bloomr^ two Gen-? 
demen of C^ity had not chanc d^ \vSs, in the vjsry 
nick^ to pafi through vm Town in theil: Way to Se* 
^ly followed by three or foior Servants. Thelb Gen« 
demen, curious to know die Meanii^ of all ^ 
Mob and Tumulty forcibly OMn'd the Crowds Sword 
in Hand^ and came up to Don Mmf^y whom diev 
prefendy knew^ and were gi^dv furpriz'd, but reih 
cu'd him from diisPack of Raskaky not without I^n-* 
get of their own Lives^ two or t^r Servants being 
very much wounded. This made the Pcafants csb^ 
fill to iecure their other Priibner; and diat was the 
faving of his Life. In the mean time^ Don Aki^^ 
tfao' m no Condidon to ferve his Friend^ could not 
conient to ledii^e tte Place^ without ieelng him at Ii« 
berty J and openhr declared, he had rather dicM^ith 
him^ or be imprlion'd with turn, dum thus abandon 
hlau But thde Gendemen reprefented to him the 
iiii{x>ffibility of rticuing his Friend, becaufe he was 
now aAually JEhut up in the BiuHflf s own HouTe, who 
liadfaeen all alon^ at the Head of tluls Rabble, anima* 
ting them to revenge the Delstdi of his Son : and 
who kept the Mob ttill up it) Arms round his Houft 
to iecare the Prifoner. They were of Opinion, 

: V % dxar 

212 The Life anJ ABkns PartL 

that wliat they could beft and moit properly do^ was^ 
v^ithout lofuig a Moment's Time^ to go and aflemble 
all the Friends they could eet together^ and to come 
in the Nighty they and their Servants^ and refcue 
liim by force. Don Alonfi yielded to the Weight of 
this Advice^ as very reafbnable and probable ; and 
this had been aftually done as it was projet9:ed^ had 
tiot the BailiiF^ fufpeding fome fuch Violence, fent 
Away to Sevil immediately^ to inform the Magiftrates 
and Courts of Tuftice ; who prefently fent a Com- 
pany of the dual Guards, and other arm'd Men, 
to iecure the l^eace and Priibner ; which broke!dl 
the Meafures of theie Gentlemen, who had akeady 
got together at lead 40 Mailers and Men. Qoe 
may well conjedure, in what Pain, in what Alarm,, 
the two Ladies were, for they were too near all thi^ 
Buftl6 and Confufion, to be totally ignorant of what 
was doing: and they had too much Intereftinit^ 
not to inform themielves. All the Domefticks of 
TMi Ltwis^ both Wcrnieq and Men, were in the Field 
to (ee the Event of this notable Campaign, their 
Matter not being yet returned. They all knew Am^ 
hofk again, and they were every. Moment, one or 
OfneT, oringing News of the flain and the wounded, 
and of all the conftderable A<%ions and PafTages; bur 
'twas always in favour of the Brave JmSrofioy of 
whom they talk'd, as of the moft terrible Man they 
ever faw in their Lives, and yet with Heaiiire, for 
they all lov'd him. /Twas no fooner known that he 
was taken, but Dofm/iEhira, in concert with I>araxa^ 
fent to tell the Bailiff, that he ihould take heed what 
he did ,* for if that Man were injured, his Life would 
aniwer it. This Meflage was admirably timed, and 
proved exceeding ierviceable to him ; for from that 
Moment he was better treated, and more confider'd j 
and as all Don Lewis's Family had free Accefs at the 
Bailiffs Houie, who was an Officer of their Maftcr*$> 
rfiey h?d allof them fr?e Liberty to feethe Prifoner^and 
: * they 

Book L of Cu2tnad d^Alfarache. 2 1 3 

they brought him all manner of Refrefliments. All 
of them^ even to Claricia and Laida^ would needs 
have the Pleafurc of feeing and ferving him ; and 
the laft of them gave him a Billet from her Lady, 
which fhe dipt into his Hand^ unperceiv'd by the 
reft : It was pretty near in thefe Terms ; 



As there is no Body but your felf, Oz^in, that 
knows^ to what an excels I love you ; fo there is 
none but you that can poflibly guefs^ what I have 

fone through within thefe laft Three or Four 
[ours. Death it felf is a leis Evil, than this Con- 
dition wherein I find my felf, for your fake* 
One cannot fear Death, when one loves : and 
^^ when that which is beloved is invdv'd in (uch a 
^^ Danger, as that wherein my only ill Fortune 
'^ has plung'd you. I fend Laida to know how 
*^ you are ; whether your are wounded, and if your 
^^ Life be in danger. Mine depends on yours. Let 
'^ me, if poffible, know how it feres with you, by 
'* your own dear Hand j for nothing but tne Cha- 
^^ raders of that Hand, can Calm the violent Tern- 
^' pefts of my Heart. Ah ! wretched Day, for me ! 
^^ And yet more wretched Night ! unleis I am fb 
'* happy as to be affur*d, that 1 have nothing to ap- 
^^ prehend in point of Danger to you ! elfe, this will 
^^ be my laft ; ahd you mall not die alone* Has 
Love made and fram'd us for each odier, only to 
render us, even by that, fo much the more mife- 
rable ? At leaft, we cannot be depriv'd of thp 
^' Pleafure of dying together. That will depend 
^^ upon the News that Claricia and Laida will pring 
^^ me. Till then, I have no Repofe ^ but ftruggle 
". in the Confines of Life and Death, telling all the 
^^ Minutes. Moft miferable State ! But if no Oz- 
^^ fnin i depend upon't, there can be no Daraxa. 


t * 4 * 

j> 5 ' This 

214 TheUfitmdMtMi Fatcl 

This faithful Lover having taken a fit Time to 
read diis welcome Letter^ and having his Pencil 
and Writing-Tablets about him^ as was ufoal for die 
Men of Quality of thofeTimes^ and efpedany the 
Momy he therein wrote this Anfwer : 

^' Had I pour'd out all tfty Blood for your fike^ 
^ moft lov^ D0rkM y yet I could not have nte- 
'^ jiced the Tendeme^ ami R^ard you exprefi fdr 
*^ my Life, Thtt Life, you ai^ fo |)lcafed to Prize, 
*^ is hitherto fecure. I have been clareful of it, as of 
^^ &3mthing that had the Honour to be devoted 
'^ to you ; but now it will indeed become predous 
^^ ana eftimable, fihcfc you ate pleas'd tx> fix it to 
^^ your own. Live^ cnarnting DMraxa^ and hope 
'^ better of Love. He is a God^ of encfieis Po^ets 
'^ and Manners of retrieving, f^ beyond all our 
*' Prolpeds. He never intlrely abamons true and 
f ^ faiclmil Lovers. He ba^ b^un with us by Pauls 
^ and Mifeiies : He will make ah end by Joys and 
^^ Pleafures. 1 have intirely iubmitted my &If tt) 
^^ him : *Tis on his Pirt now, to fitew his Ptowelr 
'^ and Care, and Goodhbfs towards me. it hte this 
'^ Day coft you Ibme Teajts : He will repqr ^^ 
*^ wkE Uftuy, in Joys j and will flill prmrte you, 

ToMr Fshifitf 


Laida had ho fi)oner got this Anfwer from our 
Lover, but . (he and uarida went back to thdr 
Ladies, and gave them an account of die Conditioa 
he was in ; and that he had but two or three ffi^t 
Wounds- They prefenriy foit him wiiatever he 
could poflSbly want to forward his Cwe, and nujkft 
all Things eafie to him« But at laft Don Lwi 
returns, fo the Difturbance of all the little Confo- 
lation that they yet retained amidft this great Mis- 

' fortune* 

L (/ Guznian d^AlfaracheJ 21$ 

forrnne. He was not able to make Head or Tail 
of all this Tumult and Diforder of his Town, from 
the Peafants he had met and talked with ; they all 
fpoke of it fo varioufly and confufedly. But when 
he was got home, he prefently undemood a great 
part of the Matter. He was diftinAly told every 
Particular, except the going abroad of the two 
Ladies ; cdF which, none m the whole Family had 
aity Kiiowledge^ befides the two Confidents. This 
new Iniblence, of the pretended Amhrojioy put him 
in fuch a Rage, that he was no longer Mafter of 
himfelf.. He was perfwaded, that this Matter was 
not tranfaAed witnout his Daughter's being Ibme 
way or other concerned in it j and he inclined to 
believe^ that flie had caus'd him to have exaA No- 
tice or his Departure from home by ibme unknown 
Method or other. And what fiiu more inflamed 
him, was to obferve, that Daraxa was likewiie em- 
barked in this Intrigue ; there being, in his Opi^ 
nion, no manner of Doubt, but that Don jilonfo, 
who had been plainly difcem'd and knowQ as well 
9s the other, was prefent upon tlus Occafion, for 
her fake ; and fome way or other in expedation of 
ieeing her, or hearing from her. ThisThoughf 
fiU'd mm with Trouble and Vexation ; and, in that 
PafHon, he would fee neither of them. But a$ 
for his Daughter, he gave flri<% Command and Di* 
regions that fhe fiiould be (hut up again; and! 
watchM and guarded, and confined, more rigidly 
than ever. Ail his Comfort was, that the Sparl; 
was catch*d j but for that, moft Certainly he had 
burft with Rage, or died of Grief. He was now 
fill! of Hope, that this time it would be impoflible 
for him to efcape him ; and that he fhould hay^ 
the Ple^ure of making l>im fall a Sacrifice to his 
Rage. Heaven only knows, after what ^rt he fent 
to engage the BaUiflTs Care of him. But after 
Furious Ruminatings, he began at lafl' to confider 

' • P 4 this 

it6 ; The Life and ASicns PartL 

this Adventure, as an Aft of Divine Juftice ; and as 
if God himfelf had delivered this Man into his 
Hands^ to repair his Honour, and glut his Revenge. 
He defir'd to be inftruded in all the Particulars of 
this Affair, from firft to laft; and fent into the 
Town, for all that niight probably be beft able 
to inform him. He was told, that all this Misfor'- 
tune happened purely from a Miftake of the Bai- 
liff's Son J who being in Love with a Neighbour's 
Daughter, a very pretty Girl, and one that had a 
good Portion, and having a Rival, si Farmer's Son^ 
who jdwelt about half a League from the Town, 
and was more welcome than he, both to Father and 
Daughter, becaufe he was in better Circumftances 
of Fortune , and a more fober and regular Lad 
than the Bailiff's Son j thi^ latter had caus'd him 
to be threatned to have him well drub'd, if ever 
he Could find that he came any more near his Mi- 
ftrefs ; and having notice given, that two Meq 
habited like ordinary Country-Fellows, but feem-: 
ing to be Ibmething better than meer Clowns, werq 
that Day flipt into the Grove, he had made no doubt 
but 'twas his Rival, with a Comrade of his that 
us d to be with him when he vifitedt tneir pretty 
Nliftrefs ; and that they were thus in pi&iufe to 
avoid the Drubbing they had been .threatned withal. 
Upon this, the Bauiff's Son had fent two Peafants, 
employed by him for this Execution, who were two 
of the boldeft and ftrongeft young Fellows that be- 
longed to the Town ; and he himfelf follow'd them 
at a little diftance, with two of his Friends, in or- 
der to affift therp, if Caufe required. Dcm Lewi 
plainly faw, by thi5 exaft and true Relation, That 
all the Fault and BJame was in the Bailiff's Son, 
and the peafants ; and that what the Gentlemen had 
done, )iad been only in their own Defence, and 
confequently they were entirely free from any legal 
Cunie : But he was foo much incens'd againft the 


BoQ^L^ of Goznan a'Almadie. 117 

pretended Amhrojioy to omit doing all that lay in 
nim to make him feem Criminal^ tho' he was nor 
in Fault j and this Opportunity of ridding him out of 
the way^ was too favourable a Jun&ure to be let flip. 
He notmng doubted^ but that Don Almfo would ofi 
his part employ all his Power and Credit to, (ave 
him; but then^ this young Lord had not that 
Power and Intereil with the Judfi;es and Mafi;i« 
ftrates that he might pofSbhr /fuppole he had j but 
that Don Lewis knew himfelt really had^ and there* 
fore he was very well aflur'd of carrying it from 
him, in Pojnt pt Power and Intereft there. There 
had not one word been told him, of the Meet* 
ing between the Ladies and the Gentlemen, becaufe 
onp of the two Peafants, he whole Jaws had been 
jbroke, jvas in no Condition to Talkj and the 
pt^er had been kill'd by returning into the Scuffle, 
^ai\d pone elfe had feen them together. Don Lewu 
ftnf, the Bailiff all neceiTary Inftrudions to profecute 
pe Prifoner with the utxnoft Rigour ; alTuring him 
o^ his ProteftiOn, his Credit, and his Purfe, in this 
whole Affair, when ever he wanted them ; and not 
only for himfelf, but for all that were concerned, 
as well on the Part of thofe that had been kiU'd, as 
alio for the wounded Perfon$, He direded, that 
diey fiiould go the next Day, all in a Body, to 5f- 
mly and throw themfelves at the Feet of the Ma^- 
ftrates, crying for Jufiice. This was accordingly 
don6 j and it fo mov'd the People, diat there was 
all the Difficulty in the World to preferve the Pri- 
foner from their miftaken Fury when he was 
brought up into the City, which was the next Day, 
dboxxt Ten in the Morning. His Guard had been 
doubled, becaufe of a Rumour, that fbme Cava« 
liers of Don Jlonfos Friends intended to Refcue 
him from the Officers of Juftice, as he ihould be 
bringing up to Stvil ; but they were not yet ftrong 
enough for Tuch an Exploit, or rather they want^ 



siS The life tmd ^Mm Part L 

at: their Head a Man of fuflkiem AAtvipr and Vi- 
;oiir, and ode thac would io heartil]^ Eipoiiie th6 
^acter^ as to undertake and manage it with Spirit 
imd Reiblution^ and animate others by his own £x- 
4Mnple. Don jllmfoy to his great Regret^ condfteing 
io mi as not to have ftrength to fit his Horfe^ Don 
iMfisy dill boiling with R<ge. and breathing no- 
^itdgbotReTenge^ and who nad not been in. Bed 
alt that Nighty caused all his Equipage to be got 
jFoady betimes v\ the Mornings to return to Setnl 
with all his Family ) whercf he knew his Prei<mce 
!Would be neceifary to pulh on this Bufinels with the 
utmdft R%our^ ana get it difpatch*d according to the 
y iolorice and Impetuofky of his Paffion. . DmraM 
£iw aU his Procedure with an inexpreffible Grief^ 
tho' indeed 't>4ras no more than flie expefted fironi 
a Man of Don Ums^ Humour ; believing^ with 
Redbn^ diat the Confideradon or the fup{Ss'd In- 
trigue between Dmpm Ehrirs and Oxmn would 
prove <>i dangerous Confequence to hmi But as to 
returning to SrvH. (he was no lefi defirous ci it 
than Don iMfU himielfy to fee how this Matter 
was like to go, and to have frequently an Account 
of all Particulars relating to it j to the end^ that, 
without fiaying for the laft Extremity, if Ihe fhottla 
find OzMins Life in Danger, and that there Was no 
moi!ie Time left to carry on his Diiguife, ihe mieht 
tdilcover liis Name and; Quality ; beif^ throu|^y 
perfuaded, as (he had good Rea(bn to be ^ that 
the Judges, after fuch a Declaration, would not 
jdare to make any further Step, without expre(s Oi^- 
^clers from their Majefties; But what cruel Alam^ 
M^as it to her ! when (he was informed, and even 
l^eard the loud Out-crie^ of the Peoj^e, that 
they demanded his Death with clamorous Impor- 
tunities : There was nothing left to Coftifbrt 
her but the generous Ardour, Wherewith fiie was 
^ery (enfible Don Almfo^ and all his Relations, ana 


%:• J 

L ff Goztmn d'A^tiache. s t^ 

Friendsy emplcnr'd their whole Credit ahd Ittteiieft^ 
with tnd6&tigaDle 2^al^ for his Ptefervation. lliis 
young Lord ledng the Danger to which his FH^id 
was expo$'d« ana that the Judges reprefented to 
cholb that rolUcited for his dear Don Jayme, that 
'ci^as a very grtat Favour that Dcm Mtfify himfelf 
was nte fectur'd and profecuted ; and dUit^ in niipt/6t 
to fairn^ th&y were willing to aft the Blind anfl 
Deaf Part ; but that the Slaughter ind Wotindi, 
aild Maimitn; of fo many Pbribns^ calTd atoiid for 
Juftice ; and that were he him&lf iti the Pri(bner\ 
Pface^ tiiey ihould poflibly be h^ put to it to be 
able to lave. hitn. This Lord^ I fay, hearing of 
all tfatie ^tt and wife Reafotlings^ could nolon« 
ger be kept in Bed by any Confideration of his 
Wounds and Weaknefi ; but cauHflg himfelf to b6 
canled with his Hdad And Arm bound up^ and d- 
moft fadf . dead^ be went bi idiat Condition frook 
Judge to Judge j and repreiented to them^ the cryw 
11^ cifumce riiey would do to a Man of iueh un-^ 


Merity in condemning him to Deaths oq^ 
ly ick defimdkg hi& life aeamft a cr^w of Aflkh 
tms, and a tumulmoiis RfibMe. ^ This indeed pro- 
duced fokne vifible Effeft^ but ftot enough to have 
Urei Don Ji^me^ but for fome uhexpeded News 
tim came j which breaking aH the Meafiires of 
DbnLn^i^difcover'd^ teftdr'd and pAcifi'd all Things. 
This was begun by an Exprefi die Queen liad 
di(patch'd to Don Lewis, ttia WMch arriV'd at ^nil 
Ae fecond D^y of this Procefi. The Queen, by 
diis C^ouxien acquainted him with the (iirrender of 
the Cxcjf or QmmAia ; and «ve him Orders^ to 
caufe varaxM to let forwards immediately^ and to 
wcompany herhimielf; beduie hef Father, who 
extreamly wifh'd t6 fee her, had defir^d to turn 
CAripan, he and all his Family ; and 'twas hop d 
&t might be moved, by that Example, to embrace 
iphrifiUifnfj likewif^ There cam^ aUb Letters for 


;A30 , The life and AMioia Fart I. 

harsxs^ one froth the Queen^ and the reft from her 
Fadier^ and other Relations : But Don LeTi/isy fol- I 
lowing the Didates of his refin'd Politicks^ was un- 
Moiling to leave unfinifli'd this darling Profecution^ 
now he had brought it fo fairly forward ; and that 
he hoped to fee it compleated the very^ next day^ 
by ODtsdning a Sentence of Death againft the Pri- 
foner ; as indeed he did : He therefore judg'd it 
tnoft. proper not to deliver thefe Letters to the 
Mnnrifii Lady ; nor to lay any thing at all to her ] 
concerning tins great News ; nor let her know of 
the Courier ; but hide all from her^ left in her 
Impatience of returning to her Parents^ ihe ihould 
conftrain him to be p;oing before he had finifh'd 
his fine Piece of Juftice. He therefore redoubled 
his Efforts^ his Diligence and Solicitations^ the reft 
of that Day ; and in fine, he foUow'd it (b clofe, 
that the next Day, about Eleven in the Forenoon^ 
Don Jayme was condemned to have his Head cut off, 
and jOrders were at the lame time given for the 
Execution ; which was to be done upon the fourth 
Day from the Sentence. Don Ahmfoy who had a 
very early Account of this unjuft Judgment, ient 
word of it forthwith to (he two Ladies ; but he al- 
fo let them know, that he had already above Three 
hundred Men in a readinefs for Aoion, and diat 
he and his Friends would all perifh, rather than fui^ 
fuch an Injuftice. Such Promifes, how weU fo ever 
meant, yet having twice already fail'd, were not 
of Force iiifficient to revive the languid Spirits of 
the defblateP^r^x^. She was under an inconceivable 
Affliftion. She went to Don Lewis^ who was but 
juft come from the Palace, where he had been all 
the Morning; and talk'd to him at (iich a rate 
with fo much Haughtineis, and fuch extraordinary 
Tranfports, that (he no longer feem'd to be the 
fame Perfon. She told him, ihe would Poniard 
hitu with her own Hand> but that &e was afiurM 


Book I 0/ Gazimifi d'AI^urache. 2^1 

there were tiiofe among her Relations^ who could 
and would acquit themielves of it much better than 
Ihe could do. She added^ that it was her Lover and 
her Husband whom he had tjius purfned to Deaths 
and not thp G^lanc of his Daughter ; for whom^ a 
Man of his Sort and his* Quality was by no means 
made. That he was a Kinfman to the King of 
Granada i whofe Bloody notwithftanding the War^* 
could not be fhed upon a Scaffold with Impunity. 
That theReparation for it w6uld in a particular manner 
be exacted nrotn him; becaufe he alone would be the 
Gaufe of his Deaths as he already was of the cruel 
Sentence pronounc'd againft him by unworthy and' 
unjuft Judges^ he having done nothmg that deferv'd* 
it. She went on yet farther, enlar^g upon many 
Points; which, not to tire you, I omit. The amaz'd 
Don Lewis found himfelf ftrangely embarrafs'd^t the 
hearing of thefe Particulars, and fo many Menaces. ' 
All flie told him, had been fo remote from his Ideas: 
and Conceptions of Things, that notwithftanding^ 
the violent Tranfports wherein he faw her. Which- 
had a pecidiar perfwafive Language of their own/ 
and plainly Ihew'd the Intereft Ihe had in the Life of 
this Man; yet he fcarce knew what to believe, nor 
what to reply, but ftood like a Man ftruck Speech^ 
lefs, and over-whelm'd with Reproaches and Con-* 
fofion. He began, however, at length to tell hfeir, 
that the greateft Fault was on her fide, in not having^ 
fooner told him* of thefe Things, that he did not^ 
deny his having fblicited againft that Man; but then- 
he was concem'd in Honour to do it, there having- 
no Regard been had to him in the ieeiming At- 
tempt upon his Daughter. Daraxa was going to iii*; 
terrupt nim, to make him ienfible that Ozjtdm had 
not at all contributed to the ExceiTes of Dmna EU 
vira; but a Servant came and whifper'd Don JCev^V 
that there was juft now a great number of Perfbhs- 
ttid Equipages Come to the C^te, wibo were thoi%hr« 


2M Thf life 4n^ AMms fmt 

tp b« Mms^ and ^'d to fpeak with D4r4X4* Don 
I^9wm appear'd thoughtful at this Hcw^^ .and himibly 
bi^ibught the ai&i^d M^mfii Lady tx> pormit him to 
I^ave her for a Moment^ and he would inftanthr re- 
CKrnj but ihe^ whom the finallefl; Matter diJbom" 
nos'd in die agony of Soul wherjein flie wa$^ 
Had oreiently a ilrong Curiofity to know what tnighc 
J^ tne Matter^ iiot naving been able to hear one 
word of what the Servant had faid ; fo ihe ran to 
the Window to fee who it might be> whofe inquiring 
for Pon Zniw had made him feem i^ a^onifli'a ; but 
f^ her Celf wa& yet more foi vfhea (he faw they 
were Mms, with a great number c^ Hor£s$^ ana 
that the greateft part of the Man feem'd to be People 
tb^t beloi^'d to her Father* Her Joy was already 
ib great at the firft bare Appreheniion of it^ that her 
Heart paifing too fwiftly from one Ettcimkyxo aoo- 
tb^fj (be had fcarce Strerffi;th to bear it^ atid was 
JKft leady to fink into a Trance ; and this Surprife 
ftill MCreas'd upon her^ when flie (aw enter the 
B.QM95 where ihe was^ an Officer of her Father's, 
whom Don Lwis himielf came and prefented to her. 
Tbij? Officer^ after having firft paid her the R^ft 
^4 Duty owing to her Quality^ acquainted hdr diat 
thip War was now at an end, die Ci^ oiXSrmaJshdng 
t^k^n; and that her Father, havifig obtained thdr 
C^oliGk Majefties Permiffion fqr her Return^ had 
Hnt her m Equipage and Attendance fit for her il- 
luilrioos Birth ; adding, that he prefiim'd Ihe was dl« 
tft^dy inftruded ii) all thefe Particulars, by the Con* 
H« whom the Queen had fent E^ her, and 
wbp had Orders. to give her feveral Letters* But 
thflfe Letters had been till now detain'd from Jier by 
Pon Ltwif i who, being no longer able to aroid gi- 
ving them up to her, did ic with much ConfiiHon, 
ana many Bluflies, and the beft Eiccules he could 
VSISe* She was fo pofiefs'd wit^ Grief, not fo 
9iucih for the Cooditioaof her Country, as the.&tal 


Book L of GozrAan d^Alfarachc. 2 23^ 

Extreniity wherein her Lover wais {diing'd j and at 
the i^xpQ time (b agitated^ by the returning Hopes of 
better Fortune l:hat was derived to her^ fay the good 
Omet^ of the unejcpe^pd Arrival of all theie Do- 
meiticks belonging to her Father^ that flie had noc 
Power to make any Reply to this Officer^ and her 
Eyes appeared all fwelVd with gufhing Teafs. Don 
Lewis perceiving it^ prefently withdrew^ as did ^t 
Officer iikewife^ out of Refped and Duty. Slie Imc 
away preiendy for Orvledoy who contianid {at Don jtf** 
UnfoSy and who was wrap'd with Joy at the Sight of* 
ail the^ Country-men^ old Friends and Comrades <^ 
his^ who could never have come more opportune^ 
than now they did^ being jufl at the Eve of an En- 
teipri^3 ^^ which Don Almfo was preparing himfid^ 
in favo9r of O^^jtmn i and wherein OrvUdo qaade ncr 
doubt, but that th^e l<iew-Comers would fo heartfly^ 
aflifty ^fii^ difcfaarge (hdr Duty^ with Sb niudi Fef« 
vour aad Fidelity^ as to be rather an Exan^cAe (6 
others^ t^an be in any Point deficient; 'B»axafx^ 
der'd OrviiJo to go preiently after Diuner^ taking 
with him the Officer who was dius newhr ccMne from 
her Fath^^ and defire a publick Audience of die 
Judges J and to acquaint DoaAimfa with it^ who 
then beg^ to be a little better; and t<;> tdl inoi^ that 
file believ'd him to be lb much a Friend^ both to her 
felf and to the Prjifoijier) as that (he mi^t hope fronr 
him, that he wpuld willingly a^compai^ her upon 
fuch m Oceafion, MHief ein v» preferred him betom 
D(m LwU ; of whom^ as he might gueis^ ihe ihpuld 
be &r enough from accepting or pei^itdng any Setw 
vice. But as (be well knew the infem State ci faift 
und^l^d Health and Sti^ength^ ihe earneftly entreated 
him not to incommode himfelf, but to fend only 
fomQ of his Frieqds. The Judges were butt joft affiant 
bl^, when OrvkJo and the Officer arrived at dietf 
ufiial Pl^ce of Meeting ; and t^y were met to 
€oaie to foin9.1k^9luiji«ni upnnithic^stetal Advices 


224 i^TheJJfe and Aliens PartL 

they had received of the Defign of Don Jlonfo; 
wbofe Houfe^ as they were well informed, was con- 
tinually more and more filling wkh Cavaliers^ that 
came from the Country all round about^ for lo or 
12 Leagues ki extent; fo that the Judges were al- 
rc^ady aunpftrefoTv'd; for preventibn of fuch a Vio- 
lence^ to caufe the Prifoner to be executed that very 
Night in Private. They were at firft furpriz'd at this 
Requeft; but having confider'd and debated the Mat- 
ter a little) they concluded it could only be in Fa- 
vour of the Pnfoner, and for the fake of her Friend 
Donna Ehira^ whole Intrigue with Don Jayme had 
been the pubHck Talk; and that it was for that 
Caule^ that Don Leyvif had taken fo piuch Pains to 
further this Profecution. It was an intire Novelty, 
St Thing till then unknown^ for a Woman to come m 
€)eremony to an Audience^ and to ipeak in Publick 
tothenu They were a while much divided in their 
OpimonS) whether to grant the Audience defir'd, or 
not. . Many of them^ chiefly the old Gray-beards, 
were for excufing themfelves froni granting ft ; nc- 
vcrtheids^ at laft the Curiofity to lee her^ and to 
know what the Thing might be, together with the 
CCHofideratibn univerlally had for her Perlbn, Qua- 
lity and Merits^ and the Eiteem the ^een was known 
ta have for her, prevailing with them ; it was, upon 
the Queftion, carried by a good Majority, that Au- 
dience Ihould be granted her ; and Six a Clock the 
fame Evening was appointed for it. As for Don A- 
Imfo, he was cxtreamly charm'd at the Honour done 
\nm by his Mifirefs ; and had he been twice as baa, 
as he really r was, he would not have faiFd, in one 
manner or other, to have rendered her this little 
piece of Service, wherein he thought his own Con- 
cern and Intereft had exceeded hers. He was of the 
iame Opinion in this Pc4nt with the general Vogue ; 
believing that Ihe would not have made this Step, 
hut in conlktehitibQ of her Friendfiup for Dm^JtlS^ 

mra j 

Bbolf t of Cu2in4n d^lfkraiErbe,^ #1 1\. 

wra; and he praid'd the Adion as exceeding gener . 
rous. Orvkdoy Whd had no Dtrcdion as yet tQpf^tti^^ 
the Myftery to him, let hitxi ^lone in his Error, aiicjt 
went away to give Orders for the reft of th? M*t-* , 
ters^ that all Things might Se ready againft f Qr .6 ^ • 
Clock, Don Alonfo had no need to feek very far for th^ 
Friends he had a mind to employ in this fiavaUad^^ 
they were for the moftpart lodgd in his own Poj^e^ 
and he had no fooner told them the D^fire of rhp 
lovely Mcbf;, but they all ftrovfc who ihould get x^ik 
fooneft to do her Honour and Service, and have the 
licheft and nobleft Equipage and Furniture, as if 
in a Feaft of TurnMnent. Don jUhfo affifted iuany f^ , 
them in jt, who were not rich enough to do it ipf thets- 
felvesj and tt might well be faid, th^t' for io Kttle. 
time as they had to prepare themfelves, they couyi 
fcarce have appear'd more fplendid and n^agm^pe^ 
than they did. They were about .200 jSentl^mp^ o^ 
Horleback, attended by a numerous Retinue, but 
on Foot. Don L«i>w, who had notice of V^raofa.^' 
Defign from fome of die Judges chat were his parti-^ 
cular Friends, offered his Service to Accompany h^rz 
But flie returned him Thanks; telling him, Sh^ would 
%Y no means give him the Difpleamre of feeing her, 
jfoUicit for the Life of a Man, whoie Death he had 
endeavoured with fo much Induftry. Don LewU was 
much mortified at this RQfufal,.and tofindhimfeH 
€0 often reproach'd upon this Subje<9:^ fatuf what 
touch'd Mm 4cnoft nearly, and of which he ^had ^c^ 
met with the leaft Intimation, was, to ,fee So great si 
number of 'jQentlemen at his Gate, who W«re Qomp 
to attend upon Daraxa on this Occafion, and Don A- 
ionfo at the Head of tshem, inexpreffibly njagi^fic^itr 
;A4oft certsrinly, Jiad there rbeen time for it, and 'he. 
could JhAVe%eefl Arong .^augh to ha^g broJ^e diis 
Defigti, he would have left no Stone unturjEi'^, to 
have ^pepder'd it ulelefs ; but .ijicre was mw no rooni 

hmmy4>l?M^\^jf jy^.ftwWmfelf j>r|>w^^^ ?i\i 

sti€ tffe Life and Anions Pait t 

unable to iftetn ic; and it was fb much the more 
t^kcer and unfupportable tx> him^ becaule Daraxa, in 
exclufion of him»^ had made choipe of the very Man 
of whom be moft complain'd^ and was the mofi a- 
Verfe arid: op^fice to hinii She went out, taking 
little notice of ail the VeiKations that were fo vifibly 
painted in his Face^ tho' he did' his utmoft to conccd 
them. She was mightily forpris'd at fo great ancf 
gallant an Appearance of Men of Quality ; not be- 
ing able to comprehend how Don^Ahnfo could amais 
together fo great a number in fo fliort a time. He 
and all the principal of the Troop were alighted to 
conipliment-her, and' to affift her to mount foer Horfe, 
tho' he knew well enough (he flood in no need of 
any fuch Help She received him, and the reft of 
the Gentlemen^ with a^ moft charming Gracefulnefs y 
and m^e 5iii Effort to eiepre^ fome Aic of Joy, a& 
flowing" frdm tJ^ Pleafure that ffie, indeed, took in 
their kind ahd' refpedful Appearance ; but Itill there; 
was an Impreflfon' of deep Grief, and a fettled Sor- 
row, vifible in her Fasce, that was the Obfervation 
and Surprife of all the Company. She exprels'd to 
Don Almfoy the lively Sence ^ fte had of his ei^tream 
Civiliries ; acknowledging, l&e was moft fenfibly o- 
blig'd by them, and affuring him they fiiould never 
be fqrgot. She perceiv'd him to j&e ftili ib p^eand for 
weak, that Ihe very, much pity'd him > and told himi 
That tho' flie had a great deal pf Joy in ieeing him, 
yet ftie could have wifti'd moft heartily^ in Fxiend- 
ftip to him, that he had fpar d himfelf (o much Pains 
and Danger. Don Alonfo forgot nothings that a Man 
ib Love^ and full of lively Sence and noble Thoughts, 
could moft obligingly reply, and ev^n moft paffio- 
nately upon fuch an Occafion; telling her, he was 
quite unable to exprefs, ho w . veiy fenfible he; was of 
the Honour fhe had done him, in being willing to 
accept of himfel€ and his Friends to accompany her 
in the -A<%on &e was going upon j which wa^^ i9* 

deed^ an Ad of a real Heroine. The Complimenrs 
being over, fhe mounted her Horfe with her iifual 
Grace, and the Cavalcade began to defile by the 
Mom^ who ^era 40 in Number, all well eguipp'd, 
and excellently mounted, having OrvUdo and tlie 
New-come Officer at th^ir Hestd. After th^m camQ 
Daraxa in jhe middle, between Don Monfo an4 
Don Diego de Cafiroy who had alfo been one of h^ 
jLbvers, and was the intimate Friend of the Firlt 
All the Nobility followed next in very good Ordein, 
and. fix in each Rink/ Tho' this Defign had beefi 
fix'd upon with precipitation enough, and had bce^^ 
carried on very filently, yet, the Rumour of it had 
fpread thro' the City,* and had gather d the jPeople in 
Crowds, both to lee the beautious Mdov pais along 
with fp illuffrious and numerous a Body, and like- 
wife to know what' fhould be her Bufinefs at the Pq^ 
lace; fb that the Streets were fo throng'd, there 
^as fcarce dny jj^affing, the People being untir^d with 
beholding, praifmg and admiring her. .She.w^s 
drels'd in a moft extraordinary^ becoming mi^iier $ 
having' that Day put oh a Moori^ Attire j but fo rici),' 
^nd jfo rnagnificent,- as hardly could be. equalM* 
Her Father had fent it her fon^e fittle time befbr«, 
and fhe had deferred wearing it till tbe Return of the 
Court; but this . Occafion was too iniportant to be 
in that, or any thing, negleded. But wfi^t m'eil 
charm'd and furpriz'd, .wais her , graceful fitting, ri- 
ding and ma;riaging her Horfe ; a .thmg ra:re in Sj^'aiH 
for a Wo.ntaa' At laft the Cavalcade arriv'd at thp 
. Square before the Palace, where all this Cavalry 
form-d it felf Into one great Squadi;"pn round ihbXi% 
her,^ as a Guard of Honour, till the Judges Ihoald 
fend to receive her j which was done by two of thef 
principal ,CrJrers, or Ufhers, without the l^alace- 
Gate, and they conau(5te^ her f6 the Door of rher 
firft HatUi- Where fhe Wi? receit'd by two of the 
.}v4it^$4 ^ho dldh^^r aU tb€i Honours that <sqvM hifa 
^ ^ - - " ^i" Ira« 

228 The life and Anions Part I 

been done to a Princels^ and fhe was led after the 
feme manner to her Audience. All thoft Officers^ 
and other young Nobles, who had alighted from" 
their Horfes as me difmounted from hers, follow'd 
her, and enter d alfo into the Hall, to the great Afto- 
iiifliment of the Judges, who underftood* not the 
meaning on't, and many of them grew very uneafy 
^ it. They had fet her a great Arm'd-Chair with a 
Cttdiion, and fpread a Carpet of Tapeftry for a 
Foot-cloth. But the whole Affembly was uirpriz d 
and charm'd at the Free and Majeftick Air where- 
with fhe entered the Hall, and feated her felf in her 
Chair^ Being feated, after ibme Moments of Silence^ 
fhe fkft beheld all the Judges with great Earneftneft 
and fix'd Attention; and then with a loijd, clear, di- 
ftind Voice, that was naturally harmonious, fhe thus* 
Harangu'd them: 

^^ It is fo little Ciiffomary, my Lords, to fee a 
*^ Perfon of my Sex appear before fuch an Affembly 
*^ as yours, that you will not doubt, but it muft be 
*' fome very important Caufe that brings me hither. 
*^ I know the Rules prefcrib'd us by JDecency and 
*^ Modefty, and I Ihould not deviate pr vary from 
'^ them,if Time and Place had permitted me to make 
'^ ufe of the ufual and ordinary Means j but there are 
** Occ4fions and Seafons, wherein the beft and jufteft 
^^ Rule is that of obferving none at all. 1 am come 
^ hither, my Lords, to implore your Juftice, againft 
*' your Juftice it felf, and to put your Equity upon 
^^ correcting a Sentence of Death, that you ha^re 
^^ pafi'd upon a Man who hath committed no other 
f^ Crime but that of defending his Life againft Af- 
^^ faffins, who attempted to ravifh it from him. I 
^ fpeak not this, my Lords, from the Reports of 
^^ others : I acquaint you with what my Eyes faw, 
^ *' and what was alfo^ and equally, feen by the Eyes 
*'^ of the Daughter of Don iwiy,*hismortal Enemy. 

Bdok h if.Ositman d'Alfarache^ 22^; 



This cannot be calFd punifliing Crimes, but au-^ 
thorizing them, and making the Innocent fuffer 
the Pains of the Guilty. Your Sentence condemns 
the Lives of all the Honeft, and »v§$ them up for , 
^^ a Prey to Murderers ; and there is not one Judge 
^' of all thole that pronounced it, who cannot find . 
*^ himfelf equally diipos'd and inclined to the very 
^' lame Fault ^ fince it is certain, thpt there is not 
^^ one among them, , who feeing himfelf attack'd^ . 
^^ and in danger to lofe his Life, would not ufe his . 
^^ utmoft Efforts to prevent his Enemy, and even to 
^^ kill him, if he could not other wile preferve himfelf. 
^* But what need can there be of lb many Arguments 
^^ for the Proof of a Law fo wholly natural, and of. 
^* which you are alr^dy better perfwaded than I 
^^ am ? The Queftion is, concerning the Matter of 
^^ Fad, whether it be as I have ftated it? It is fi> 
^^ eafy to prove it, that I much doubt, whether any 
'^ Shadow of ian Evidence can be brought in Contra^ 
^^ di&ion to it. We were not alone, my Lords, 
Donna Elvira and J; we had alio with ps two of 


our Women, who may Ukew^fe be e^aniin'd, and 
who are r^ady to declare the Truth as well as we. 
Whaj Wrong, my Lords, wa$ done by two Gentle- 
men, tp two infamous Pealants, in being with us, 
that they fliould come in light of Don Lewis's 
Houfe, and attempt to brain (hem with Clubs that 
they were arm'd withal ? Well, but they lay now, 
^ 't w^ d miftake of the BaililF's Son. Does that ml* 
^^ ftake make thi^ Affaffination lels Violent, and left 
^^ Cruel and Outrageous, to be us*d towards People 
*^ of Quality?' But the lecond Attack, in which this 
'^ furious Son of the bailiff was the Head, that can- 
*^ not poffibly pafs for a Miftake, but is a downright 
^ formal Aflamnation, and inexcufably fo, fince they 
^* came fuperibr in Number, and arm'd with huge 
^^ 4rawn Swords, and fell upon woMen that had 
1^ pjjjy Staves. Wherie then,, my Lprds-^ is theCrinje 

83 the Life dM Anions P^rt I. 



.of the. Perfons attack'd, unlets it be in not letting 
. thv:TireIves be kiU'd and aflfaffinated by thefe new 
VillaiiiSj or by the whole Rabble of the Town, 
^^. whe took up Arms againft two Gentlemen that 
^^ had not done them the leaft Wrong, npr fpoke 
^^. one Word to them. I will^ ,my Lords, (pare you 
^^ the Trouble of enlarging my Difcourre, which 
^^ how juft foever, and tho' it contain nothing but 
what is True, Clear, and Evident, yet cannot, 
frorh the Nature of it, but be Tedious and Trouble- 
fome to you. I will alfo fpare fome, not fo much 
as naming fhem, whofe Paffions have made a lit- 
tle too much Noife upon this Occafion; but I 
ought no: to leave you in the Dark, as to what 
obliges me to Intereft my felf fo much in the Life 
^J of him for whom. I intercede. He is a nearKint 
. man to King Mahomet, defcended from the lyings 
^^ pf Granada.; 'tis the Brave Ozjmln^ my Lords, and 
^ no iDon Jaywe. His real l^ame, Oz^tnin^ is well 
^^ known among youx Troops, and fuflSciently fllu- 
" ftrious after fo many Adions worthy of Glory^ 
'^ This is theM^n that kill'dth6 two Bulls on the Day 
'^ of the Courfes, and fav'd the Life of the generous 
^ Don Alonfo. But to fay yet fomething more, at 
^^ leaft, with regard to me, he is my Husband,, if I 
^^ may be permitted to give that Name to a M^ 
^^ with whom L am engag'd by Promife and. in Ho- 
^^ nour, and that by the mujtual Commands. pf our. 
^^ Parents. It is now, my Lords, on your Parts to 
^^ confider what you have to do, withrpMrd to^ 
'^ Perfon of his Worth and Dignity, .\vhoIe Life is 
*^ not of fo little Moment, .as to be cheaply thrown 
V away, to be raflily condemn'd, arid to be put to 
^^ Death in the fame flight Manner,^s qlight be donQ 
'" to a Man of no fort of Gpnfequen.c^,' 


*■ ' ■ ^ -. . • • ' ... 

, . She had no fooner made, an end of Speaking, bm 
ifierp was a Noife throughout ' the Hall, that very 

i . J '« • »• 

Bod: I if Guzman cf Alfarache. a 3 1 

p^ch ftartled and frighted the Judges ; evciy body 
crying out^That the Prifbner ought to be dlfcHarg'd, 
and that his Ufage had been highly unjuft. The 
Judges repKedj in a few Words^ to the beautiful 
'Momjh Lady, 'that 'twas very poffible they nright 
have been mifinform'd in this Affair, and that it w^s 
no Fault of theirs that th^ were kept ignorant of the 
Rank and QuaEty of this Gemleman; that they would 
l^eview the whole Matter, and would give her their 
Anfwer that very fame Day. But the whole Affem^ 
bly cri'd out again. That the Prifoner was Innocent^ 
and ought to be fet at Liberty, threatening othei'wijfe 
^o break open ^he Prifon-Dobrs, and takeliim thence 
by Force. To which the Judges calmly repli'd'. That 
after Judgment, the Matter depend^^d no more upon 
them. That to make Ufe of Force :^nd Violence 
to free the Prifoner, would be an Affront to the Ma- 
jefly of their Princes, and an Injury to Juftice, which 
they w-ere entrufted with, and oblig'd to maintain. 
That all they could do on their parts, was to fufpend 
Executiontill their Majefties were pleas'd to give their 
Orders in it. Daraxa thtn deCix'd Permiffion to vifit 
the Prifoner; and it -was granted her, provided that 
po Inore than four Perfons ftiould enter the Priibfi 
>«^ith her, and that (he would engage that no Difof- 
der Ihould happen there, nor no Violence be us'd | 
all which Ihe promised. And thus every body was 
quiet and eafy, and this People, who but three Days 
before had demanded the Death of this Man, were 
ready to make publick Denionftrations of their Jc^ 
becaufe his Life was fpar'd. The Ca^valcade marched 
in the fame Order to the Prifon. Daraxa named 
' Don Atonfo^ Don Diego h Cajiro^ and Or^iedoy with 
the Mtmi^ Officer, to go in with her. As this great 
nutiabei- of Cavaliters, aind fiich a vaft throng of Peo- 
ple; made a mighty Noife and JJuftle in the Streets, 
Oimin heard it, " and was fiippriz'd at it, nor being 
^Blf to guefsvi^hat Ihould 'be *he Matter^ But he wa$ 

^4 p^i^<?^* 

^i Tk life and ASliOM PartJ. 

%ftiuch more agreeably fupriz'd when he faw his Ipve^ 
!y Daraxa entering hi^ Chamber with Don Alanjg. 
This Surprife^neverthdelsj how great and how agree- 
i^ble foever^ quickly gftve Plaqe to the Embtjons of 
-Joy that feii'd himj and above all, wb?n he knew 
what had brought thcHi to him, and what had been 
juft done for him by his dearly belov'd Spoufe or Mi- 
ftref^.. She was fo pleas'd and eafy in her Mind, and 
-her Heart was in fuch a Rapture at the fighl of hinsi 
. that me eould not exprefs her Sentiment but by her 
Eyes i, and ihe was a confiderafcle time without ha- 
ving Power to fpeak to him. Don Al(mfo embraced 
. bz^Min with |[reat Trahlports of Tendernefs j but in 
^ the midft of them, he intermingl'd kind Reproaches 
, ibr his want of an in tire Conscience in him, threat- 
iiing h}m to revenge it, by continuing to be in Love 
i^lth^ihc charming Para 9ca for tke whole remainder 
.6f his.Life, This drew obliging. Carelfes Oft him 
irora both of them ; and Daraxa aflur'd him. That, 
;tiext ^after Oz»mn^ he.fhould always poifeis a chief 
jpaft in her Efteem : While Oz,fnin cteclar d. That he 
could nev;er peafe to Lpve, Honour, Value, and Em- 
^>race^ with, his whole Heart, a Gentleman to whofe 
^ excels of JSIoblehefs he had fo rhwy and fo great 
pbligations. t)on 4lonfo made oblig^g Returns to 
DOtH, afTuring them of his imtputable Fnendfhip, and 
|bis utmoA Services upon all Qccafions. He prefent** 
(^at>on biezp de Calho to Oxminy as a Cavalier of a 
dimn^uifk'd Birth and Merit , and his particular 
j^nend : But, at lafl, pacing from thefe mutual, (pi- 
der,. And hearty Enaeavours, to the Confideration 
bf their prefeiit Cafe, and whftt moft immediately 
prefs'ci, which was to fee ^hat could be done to tcr- 
^ hiinate this grand Affair with the greateft Speed. Xt 
Was I'^foly^d to difpatch away Or^iaU that very 
Ki|;ht for Granada^ with Letters both to Ozmins and 
^araxa^ friends and Relations, to intercede inftantly 
. and ftr»n^o^fly with their CiffV^^i M<^j^fii^sM pbt^ljp 


3ookI. 0/ Quzman (FAlfarachc s|g 

their Pardon for Ozmin ; For the equally amorous and 
beautiful Daraica^hbw earneftly foever both the Queeij 
and her Father had prefs'd herein their Letters^to ha- 
ften hejp Joiirney to Granada^ flie was not able to think 
of it without the Company of her * belov'd Ozmip. 
OrvieJo made fpch Pifpatch. that he came hsLck thp 
third Day with Oj2:.iw;Vs Pardon; and an Order froni 
their Majefiks to the Magiftrates of the City, tp do 
him all the Honours due to his Birth and Merit. 
And thus he left that Prifon with as much Glory an4 
Joy, as he was thruft into it with Shame and Sorrow, 
Daraxa went her felf to fetch him out of Prifon with 
a like Equipage, Train and Attendants, but far more 
ilMumerous, Righ, Gay and Magnificent, a^ having 
hadmojce time to prepare fort.EvenDonll^^r//i> hinv 
felf would needs make one at it, and made himfeif 
remarkable by his Magnificence, ^d by his earneii 
Compliment3 of Joy to fiaraxa for the good Succels 
0f thjs Affair. 'Tis true, indeed, that in fpitc of all 
his "Father's Rage, and notwithftanding his Conceri 
in refpeA of his Sifter, yet he always comported 
himfeif with a great deal of Difcretion and Moderar 
tion^ and exprefs'd himfeif upon feveral Occafion% 
that he difapprov'd the Conduft of his Father, and 
would have folicited againft him, had he dar'd to do 
it. And, jndeed, he acquitted himfeif 'toy/ards Ozr 
mifK whj^h he faw him, in d very handfome, franjf 
anci obliging Manner, without entring upon what 
concerned his Father, faeither to excufe nor condemn 
him. As for the fierce D0n Lewis % Refentment,it aba^ 
ted but little for all the Difcoveries,occafiotfd by this 
Affair, of the Birth of Oz^min^ and the £ngagement$ 
t)etween , him and paraxa^ and that he had nevei^ 
?nade any Pretentions to his Daughter.. He continued 

£f Opinion, that the Honour p£ his Family muft 
. ave fuffer'd by the Noife tod Talk that had beea 
bade; and that (>x,mn^ thof otherwlfe riot much to 
\^^h y^^was fcuilty enoukhi asfphim/i^ bein§; 

194 The Life an J AHhns Parti, 

the Objc<5k of his Daughter's Extravagancies- but 
what he could never Pardon him^ and was a more 
fenlible Wound to him fhan all the reft, was^ to have 
taken him for ^ Tool ; he^ who thought himfelf the 
leaft capable of being impos'd upon in thofe fort of 
Intrigues ; and he was mortally afraid of being rallied 
at Court upon this Account, and turn'd into Ridi- 
cule. So that not only he would not go and pay 
his Refpe(93 and Compliments to Oz^rnhj as did all 
the r^ft of the young Cavaliers, and grave Lords, 
in and about Se^il ; but he even excus'd himfelf -from 
accompanying Daraxa to Granada^ under pretence of 
a feign d Indifpofition, and therefore appeard no 
more in SenuH till after fhe was gohe. Poor Denna 
Elvira was very unfortunate indeed, for ihe had all 
the ill Humours of her Father to contend with, who 
laid the whole Blame upon her j but fhe had other 
and more raging Ills to contend with, and fufFer hy, 
as thofe of Jealoufy, and mortal Regret of her.Infa- 
jtuation and Blindnefs, and to have been made a Tool 
and a Property of by two Perfbns fo very deair to her; 
tho' in truth me had more caufc to complain of her 
ielf than them. She did not long furvive thofe Trou- 
bles ^ but to the laft Moment of her Life fhe* could 
never forget, nor ceafe to love, her dear Don Jajmey 
as fhe intimated to him, by a Ring fhe fent him to 
tSramiaj fome few Days before ftie. died; All the ill 
humours of Don Lewis ^ and Jealoufy of his Datigh- 
Iter, 4id not hinder the makinjgof extraordinary Re- 
log^cings at SevH for the Liberty of Ozmm^ and chief- 
fy at Don Alonfo\ where he corltinu d to lodge, and 
TBThere he would needs flay one Day longei*, as well 
iiot to refufe his friend's ilequefl: of It,- as alfb to 
fiave fo mudi Time to return his Thanks tp all thofe 
^oneft Gendemen' of the late Cavalcade, of whom 
there was not one to whom he did not make fome 
jprefent before he wetir away • .having eniploy*d in 
** Gratifications, as fex as to 20Q00 Franks* Many 


pook I. of Guzman cJ^Alftradic. 2^5 

of the Gendemexi would needs accompany him to 
Granada^ to affijlf at his Nuptials j aqd^ among other;^ 
Don Alenfo and Don Xfiego de C^afho: They were^ccr 
lebfated in fpite of the Noife and Tumults of War> 
(not very confident with Feafting and Rejoycing) 
with lb great Splendor and Magnificence^ that fcarce 
has there beep any thing of that kind more Noble 
and ^lendid. Their Cathtliek Majefiiu honour'd 
them with their Prefence almoft continually. Ther^ 
was Tilts *nd Turnaments^ and BulUFeafts, whereiq 
as well Moors as Cbrifliansy of the one and the other 
Court, made their valour and Addrefs appear. AncJ 
in fine, haying receiv'd Baptifm, they and their Pa- 
rents, Relations and Families, they are fince become 
one of the moft Populous, Flpuriftiing and lUuftriou^ 
Houfes in the whole Sfanij^ Monarchy., 

. ' • • • 

This Story was no Iboner en4ed, but we faw th? 
Steeples of Caif^Ua. The Tiihe nor Way had been te^ 
dious to any body; every one after his manner re- 
^urn'd Thanks to the honeft Gentleman that had be-^ 
itow'd this Entertainment upon us ; and there was not 
pije of us, who did not fimify to him the particular 
SatisfacStipn he had reeeivd by To delightful a Rela- 
tion. The good Fathers, and the other Gentlemen, 
reafon d a licde niore upoa all thtfe different £v^k$^ 
like Men that underftood thcmfelyes well, and krieW 
the World. As for the Mukuer, who knew but little 
of thole Matters, and did not trouble himfelf much' 
about them, he was for another fort of reafbning 
with me. He had, as I (aid, kept a profound Silence 
ever fince our laft Adventures, but when he faw we 
Were at the Gates of Caz^f^y and were about to part, 
his ToAgue began to get loofe, to ask me for fbme 
Money tor my Journey, and for two fair Meals We 
had made at the laft Inn, which he computed at 
three Crowns. This was quite another fort of Story 
for me* He would h?iv^ been a rar? Fellow, if he 


iai. , The .Hfr an J Anions . I^artL: 

could have made me pay them, for I w^s far enough 
ftom being Mafter of fo much Money. We were juft' 
f eady to fall to Fifty-Cuffs about it, and I had alrea- 
dy provided my felf with two Flints' to make, up for 
the Weaknefs of my Arms: But thefe Gentlemen 
and good JFathers, who piti'd me, interpofing their . 
Authority, made him hearken to Reafon^ and as it 
Was not juft I fhould be compelled to pay for my 
Riding, which he had freely profer'd of his own ac- 
cord, and without my defjring j fd they only con- 
demn'd me to reimburle him the Expence of my Shot 
for the Mule's Provender, and to give him fomething 
more for the keeping of \^Mmt that Night, and 
]this almoft quite drein'd my poor Pnrfe, there now 
remaining (carce enough to make one good Meal^ 
And have one good Night's Lodging, which I went* 
to feek as far as I coula from this MuUtttr^ who uut 
deritood Jnns fo providently well, and had to do with 
fi> good Cpoks^ 9nd fuch honei^ Pepple^ 




t il I 

i. . 

» • # 

r> . . « ' i 

Book'XL i^ji 

■--'-- ■ '■' ■->...-y'< ' ■ -^ ■"■ ■• ■- .'.'i-.*. •■■■ . -^ -V -i -|f|',i , I I I J HIT 1' 

», ..■■ I H n I II M >ii U I ■■■■ M I 11 i> ' i ■■ ■■■ w wf 

t H E 



Of fhe Famotis 



Guzman dAIfarache. 

■ ■ . ■ .I.-. I p I I ■! I I I I I I p 11 I I , » I I mmmmmilmg^timf'^^''^'^^ 

Part I. Book II. 

M i ^ i iiy» *iifc ■ » ■ y « m tp Ill | i I ; ■ ■ i n< > ^ 


C H A P. L 

Cuzinan, inhk way from Cazallai^ Madrid, j|^/fj^ 
of the bad State and Condition cf a mifarable Man 5 
and thence tak§s Occasion to Difcourje gravely on 
, the Conjequences oi Want^ Shame^ Cajtles in the 
Air^ and the li^e : And at lafi^ tells how he 
came to Jerve an Innkeeper ^ with the wicked Dif 
portions of that firt of Peofle. 

[H O V fee'ft me.^ Header^ at length at Ca- 
z,aUay Twelve Leagues from Se'vi/, upon a 
Monday Morning, with my Purfe penni- 

lefsj and Condition remedilels^ after'having 

l^een accused for a Thief, as a fort of Prophecy of 
what I flipuld l3e pne Pay. TheFirft'Day f ifet 


i^^ the Life and A^ioni Vmt 

iotxAy I fuffer*d enough ; the Second yet more^ be- 
cauiexay Troubles encrqas'd^ and one Mifchief came 
upon the Neck of another. I had not long fince 
Money in my Pocket, and Meit to put in rity Belly j 
but now 'tis quite slnother Cafe, for now I have 
neither Money nor Meat. Any thing may be bomy 
when a Body has Br^ad to Eat ; but when one has 
none, every Thing is intoUerable. "tis good to have 
a Father, 'tis gooa to have a 'Motljter, but atove all 
'tis good to haive i good Belly-full. The Third Day 
.of my Expedition! was .in a mamier quite dead, for 
1 coald think my felf like nothing more than a lean 
half-ftarv'd Dog, at whom other Dogs barking, as 
is ufuafl, he turns about and gnafties his Teeth, but 
dares Bite none of them. So I, tho* I faw my felf 
furrounded with Misfortunes, durft not Quarrel 
^ith-aay of them,'tW I fuffer'd fo nxuch by jthem, 
fo low was I brought. I was then truly lenfible 
of the Viflue of the « leaft Piece ^f Money, for he 
t^hat. never wants^ never knows how to prize his 
Hafppinefs. Thi$, indeed, was the firft time I had 
look d the Hereti9k Nepeffity in the Fkce. I knew 
her before by her Charader, but now had leifurc 
io confid^r ,her better by her £jQte^. How many 
iofawous Things- does- thgct frightful Figure exj^ie us 
to ? What terrible Apprehenfions .does {he occSafion 
ts ? Whjit btfle and unlawful Adions make lis at- 
tempti,arxd fometinles eiren fuck as afre imprataicable ? 
'Onthe other hand, 1 Sufficiently experiencJdf, that 
• 'l^ature was . to . be cpnt^nted with little j^et, tho* 
flie difpericcs never io muph, how few are fatisfy'd 
with their Lot ? Every Body is poor, becaufe etery 
Bpdy complfidns xhat they hatv€^not wl?at they de- 
-fire. O unhappy J^/Viire / who confum*ft thy Wealth' 
fo lavilhly f What a Fool, art. thoa to ebniplain: 
, thw thou Ipetid'ft fo many Thpufand t>ticatsy when 
..thou at the fame time pWff that thou eatt ft ? 
jQcmpJUia rather^ tfatft thou haft ^cf fo aiahy t>ucau 

Boplrll* (/ Gozmaa d^Alfanche.^ 8 3/ 

to fpetid^ and employ 'd them fo'ill^ and not that thou 
haft eat chem ; for if thou eat'j^^ what Reafon haft 
thou to complain ? Art thou more a Man thaa 
I^who am fat and jufty i And yet I feed upon nothing 
but rotten Lentils^ dry Fitches, hard Grey Peas^r 
and Moufe-eaten Bisket. Wilt thou, or can ft tbou^ 
give me a Reafou for all this ? What I know of the 
Matter is, that if thou had^ft been once reduc'd ta 
Neceffity, as I have been, thou would'ft then know^ 
that Hunger- is the beft Sauce, For my pan, • i 
wifii no- Man ill, and only lament my own Misfor-^ 
tunes. Neceflity is not only the beft Sauce to all 
Meats, but likewife the beft Miftrefs to all Trades* 
She is full of Invention, and makes Magpies^ Jack-* 
daws, Thrufhes, and Parrots to fpeak. It was She 
alfo that made me ienfible, that bad Forttuie makes 
Men wife ; for She feem'd to reprefent .to me, as it 
were in a Mirfour, what. was Paft, Prefent, and to 
Come. I had hitherto been a Coxcomb, and the 
Condition of a Widow's Son well became me, that 
is, to be Well-fed and Ill-bred* There was a great 
deal to be amended in me, and the hrft Step towards 
it was die Omekf I met with, wWch made me ienfi- 
ble of fbme Folk's Dealings. ^ I faw my felf imme- 
diately after, young and unexperienced as I was, em^ 
bark'd in the main Ocean, without knowing -where 
to land* The worft was^ that tho' I found I was * 
thus embarrafs'd, I had no Body to ask Councel of^ 
therefore was fain to reafbn with my felf. Poor Rea^ 
Ibning^ alas I which helped but little towards bringing 
me out of my Troubles. I had refolv'd to go ho; 
farther, becaufe I wdnted wherewith, ,but then I 
wanted likewife wherewithal to return : -Moreover, 
I thought it a Shame to go any more to Sew/, which 
I had left with To great Indignation. O Shame^ thqu 
fatal Poifon> of human Life! How many Inconve- 
niencies have I known occafion'd by thee ? How 
many Maids have ceas'd to hj^fbj through >a Shamar 


%/^6 The Life dnd A^ioni Partt 

of refiifing any thing, to fuch as have been fo kind as 
to make them Prefents ? How many Mothers have 
firov'd Parricides on the fame Account? How many 
Cullies and Coxcombs have been drawn into Bonds 
and Suretifiiips for others, and afterwards paid . ?:he 
Debt, to the Prejudice of their Wives and Children, 
ihccrly becaufe they were afh^m'd to deny thofe that 
^k'd them ? How much Money his been lent and 
borrowed op the fcoteof Friendfliip, and yet both 
Money and Friend have been loft at laft ? Nay, he 
.diat lent fhall be oftentimes found to Want, and 
he that borrowed never fupply his Nep effities j the 
Lendef bolng afliam'd tp ask, and the Borrower too 
much a Rogue to offer. The Lender has not the 
■Courage to demand his own, becaufe he is reduced 
to a mean Condition j and the Borrower is fo much 
exalted above Ids former Station, that he thinks it 
below him to look down even upon one that has 
oblig'd him. I w:ptild have thee to know, if thou 
doft not know it already, that Shame i$ like the 
Web in a Weaver's Loom, where, if one Thread 
be broken, it all unravels, and muft be begun again. 
In all Things that m^y do thee Harm, or jtum td 
thy Difadvantage, haVa nothing to do with Shame, 
but let the Threads break as often as they will. If 
there be aay Inconvenience to undergo, by doing 
«ny thin^ that is a^k'd of thee, it were b.etter td 
fall on him that requires it of thee, than on thee 
that ow'ft him nothing, aiyi who art not oblig'd to 
takjB another's Crimes upon thee, to be recompenc'd 
.with Ingratitude and Repentance. Remember, that 
'iShame tor reftifing, is the Shaipe of Sots. Shame if 
^ Virtue in regard to thy felf, and a great Viceiit 
Tegard to other People. Thou ought'ft to have it 
for thy felf in this Refped, that thou do no ihame- 
ful or diflioneft A^, nay, tho* no Body faw thee, 
nor knew of itj ^but as for others, M^hat haft thoa 
to do with them ? JFreethy jfelf from Ipaft 



Book II. 0/ Guzman d'AHarache. 241 

in Matters of the greateft Confequence^ and do not 
keep it like a Dog chain'd behind the Door of thy 
Ignorance, Cut or flip the Collar, and let it get a- 
way from thee as faft as it pleales. Do thou only 
be afham'd^ as I faid before^ of what is Shame- 
worthy. *Twas this foolifh Shame made me fpoil fo 
much Paper in relating the Follies of myLife^ which 
I might neveYthelels have comprehended in much 
lefs uomp^fs J but I muft now ride Poft to come at 
Things of greater Confequence, and fo pray lend 
me your Attention. 

I was mighty unwilling, ds iVe already told you, 
to return Home, and that without my Cloak, which 
People would be apt to think I had either pawn'd or 
fold for Meat or Drink in fome Inn. I was not lefs 
concerned that I muft (top, when I was in fo fair a 
Way. A Point of Honour then feiz'd me, and I 
faicl to my felf. What a Difgrace will it be for me to 
return tamely Home after the Third Day, when I 
have fet out with fo much Refolution. This Point of 
Honour is another foolilh Thine ; 'tis the Father of 
that filly Daughter I have juft been fpeaking of: 
Since it falls under my Hands, I muft lay fomething 
of it too, and truly there*s a great deal to be faid. 
'Tis that which meddles with every Thing, and 
I have a mind to treat it as it deferves. But hold, a 
little Patience I befeech you, and do not run fo much 
a-head. You may find another Opportunity for this, 
when you may give its Charader at large, that Peo- 
ple hereafter may not be deceiv'd by it. 

I made it then a Point of Honour to proceed oa 
my Expedition; and I faid to my felf, I ought to put 
Confidence in God, who never forfakes any Body, 
With this Pious Reflexion I fet forward, and took the 
direft Road to Madrid, the ordinary Refidence of 
our Kings, where was then a fhining Court, and, a- 
bove all, a young King newly married. All thij 
muft needs excite the Curiofity of fuch a young Pel- 

R - low 

24^ The Life ctni ABhm !ParC t 

low as I was. I fancied every Body muft be in love 
with^ and ftrivefor me^ fincelwas fo well made, 
and had fo good an Air. How many Inftances could 
I give of the Simplicitjr of young Men, were it 
worth my while. There is a great deal of difference 
between what we may imagine it to be, attid what it 
is in reality. 'Tis eafy to form to our fel,ves bright 
Idea's, but difficult to meet with stny thing like 
them. I am confidering what a Man is like, that 
has thefe fine Fancies In his Head. Why, he's like a 
young Child, who, riding a Cock-hofte on a Stick, 
chinks himfelf the finelieft mounted in the World. 
And then, to bring them to pafs, is like an did Bald- 
pated, Palfy-fifteo, Lanoke-legg'd FeUow, who lean- 
ing on two Crutches, sttten^t^ riie Scaling a high 
Wall that is manfully defended. I have laicTa great 
deal, but yet I know what I've faid to be true. At Night 
when all is dark, and our Heads are upon ohr Pil- 
lows, a great many Things come into them, which, 
like Fogs, vanifh as fbon as the Sun begins to appear. 
Thus, tho'I had had fijch Fancies during my Sleep, as 
foon as I were well awake they left me, and I had 
nothing before my Eyes but a long and tedious Jour- 
ney, which; for a Youth as I was, and almoft ftarv'cf 
with Hunger, was not a fmall Matter to undertake^ 
or at leaft to perform. 

I am, neverthelefs, once more fet out with a ffiorf 
Cane in my Han<f inftead of a Walking-Staff^ for, 
me'thought, all the while I had this laft, I had my 
Cloaic on my Back. In Winter, a Cloak would be 
more welcome; but in Spring, a tough Oaken- 
Plant is as good. My Cloak,- 'tis true, covers me, 
and does me more Honour j but my Plant fatigues me 
lefs, and bears me up in walking. I ^uft do my 
beft to comfort my felf whatever happens.^ Two 
Gentlemen chanc'4 to pafs by, who, by their Looks, 
feem'd to be confiderable Merchants. They were 
mounted on two Mules, which went the Grand- 

Trot. Good, £ud J to my fel£» there arc two Gea« 
tlemen that I hope will de&ay 0iy Char|;es^ I call'4 
tip ray imall Cpunige^ and had a great mind to foUow 
them ; but the' they went only the ordinary P^ce^ 
they had like ^ out*<fl;rip one that had not beep, us'd 
to TraVel^ 9sul not; eaceoi well in three Days. I 
muft^ hotyever^ beftir my Stumps^ out of the Hopes 
of a^ood Dinner. They were filent People, and 
faid JSttle or nothing, which did not much pleale nie» 
I took it for i Sign of Avarice, for there are feme 
Foiks who Bf^ Covetous^ cveji of Words, wbien they 
think they c^n by ipeakit^. do any Body a Kiadneis» 
An aigreeable Converfation nouriines the Soul, keeps^ 
up the S{H»t$ of wearied Travellers, extiaguiilie^ 
Qiief, ^ijpefc Cve, (iortens your Journey, lex^then^ 
life, aad, by a particular £}^llence, places thofe oa 
Horfeback, wto were before on Foot. ^ I mader my 
Party, however, io good, that notwithstanding their' 
Obftinace Sil^^ce, we arrived together at the In^^ 
about thrpe iCeagues from Catalla^ >her^ we w/^re to^ 
dine^ t was more dead. than living, yet, tir'd i$ 
I was, megleded not to do my Duty, for I imme« 
diately diipos'd my ielf to ho)d the Gentlemens Stir<- 
rups while they aughted, and to lead their Mules tp^ 
the Stable ; offering befides, if they pleased, to carry 
their Portmantues to their Chamoers ; but whether 
my over-*readinefs render'd ny^ fuipeded to theiti, or; 
that they were natural^ . iui^iqioas, I no fooner laid 
my Hands upon their Cioa:k-£ags, but one of tbe^ 
calls out to me, in an angry Tone, to let them alone. 
I obey'd, cho' with Regret, fearing that falfe Step^ 
might occaCon me the Lois of my jDixmer, and (fai- 
ling to mind, that Charity and Brutality neyer met to- 
gether. However, I was refblv'd not to d^ipair, ^d 
coxiie<^ently foltow'd them very humbly . with. n>y 
Hat in ray Hand. They had brought their Dinner 
Along with them, as the Cuftom of Spam fs^ th&tif 
to iay, a good Ci^ot of Mutton, ^ goo,d Hani of 

244 The Ufeand Mim Pattl 

Bacon, with Bread, Wine, and whatever elfe was 
neceffary. I haid a great mind ^o wait on them at 
Table, and, the better to procure my felf that Liber- 
ty, ofFer'd to fill them out a Glafs of Wine, if they 
pleas'd, and for that End was going to walh the G\d&, 
when he that had not yet fpoken calling an ill-na- 
tur'd Look at me, by which Iguefs'd he was not much 
better humour d than his Companion, cried. No, No, 
let it alone, we have no manner of occafion for your 
Service, O Traytors, quoth I to my felf. Enemies 
to God and Man ! I find 'tis to little or no purpofe for 
me to follow you. I had a mind, neverthelete, to 
fee them eat, not knowing, but when their Bellies 
•were full, they might be better humour'd, and ^ve 
me a Bone or fomething to pick, for at that time 
nothing would have come amifs to me. They fed as 
they travell'd, without fpeaking a Word, said with- 
out fo much as calling the leaft Look on me. I how- 
ever, on my part, devoured them with my Eyes, but 
that would not fill my Belly. But when 1 faw them, 
to my great Difappointmerit, put up what thev had 
* left in their Wallet, even to the fmalleft bit of Bread, 
I was ready to run diftraded, and, I believe, fliodd 
have died on the Spot with meer Hunger, had I not 
feen a good Fryar, of the Order of Sr. Franeit^ juft 
then enter the Room, who, tho' I could not exoeft 
much from him, was yet going to eat what he had, 
sLxid^ with whom, I thought I might in Charity 
partake. This Fryar came on Foot, and feem'd 
much tir'd, when pulling out what Provifion he had, 
he laid it on the Table.- It confifted of a good Loaf 
of Bread, and a tolerable Piece of Salt-Beef, which 
made me to jump. I had my Eyes on hini all the 
while, when looking at me by chance, and perceiving 
what I wanted, (for my Looks fpoke) he took his 
' Loaf, and giving me half of it, faid aloud. If I had but 
this in the World, and knew not where to get any 

more, I would give thee thy Share of it, fince I be- 

BooklL 0/ Guzman (TAlfarache. ^245 

lieve thou haft occasion for it: Eat^ young Man^ what 
thou wilt^ and there's a good Piece of Beef for thee * 
into the Bargain. O good God^ faid I to my feif, what 
a Providence is diis ! When thofe that could^ would 
not affift me in this Extremity, a poor Begging-Fryar 
has fpar'd me what is necelTary out of his own Belly. 
'Tis commonly feen, that thole who have the great- 
eft Plenty^ are the moft uncharitable and inlenfmle to 
liich as want ; whereas thofe that are the ieaft in a 
Capacity, are the moft ready to do Afts of Charity, 
Thefe two Merchant-like Gentlemen, whom I had 
foUow'd on Foot above two Leagues, in Hopes they 
would take Pity on me, and to whom I had offered 
my Service in the civileft manner imaginable, 
would neverthelefs not hearken to my Neceffities, 
the' my Looks fufficiently proclaimed them, whereas 
(his poor Fryar comprehended them at firft Sight, 
and reliev^i me with Pleafure, giving me half his 
Loaf^ and half his Meat, when, perhaps^ he had not 
moris than enough for himielf. What Difference is 
there between Man and Man ! I was now pretty well 
replemfli'd^ Thanks be to God and that charitable 
Fnran I thought my Fortune would have been mado 
if ne had gone the lame Way with me ; but, as ill 
Luck would have it, he went juft the contrary, for he 
was going to SeviL When he was upon the Point of 
departure, he put lus Hand in his Wallet, and puU'd 
put another finall Loaf he had there, which, he faid, 
he would divide with me, that I might have niy full 
Share of all he had j fo praying to God to bleis an4 
affift me, he departed. I put up the half Loaf in 
my Pocket, an^ having pretty vi^ll refrefli'd my felf 
with this Repaft, and a good Draught of Water, for 
the good Fryar had no better, or I had had it, I 
jogg d on very contentedly on my Journey; I travelled 
three Leagues farther, and came late at Night to an 
Inn, where I fupp'd upon my Piece of Bread, having 
nothing el(e to eat, and finding no Body there to 

J^ive me any thing. Ht #as a Plaee whew the At^ 
eteers lod^dy fome of whom came* thither towards 
Night. TheHoftallokedmeaLdd^hg^intheHay- 
lofr^ whither I went veiy contenteidfy^, hecaufe I 
could not help my felf tq a better. My Sdoper Wd^, 
Ms truey fomewhat lights and any one wflf be apt to 
teliere me when t Swear, I found- niy Stomadh ex- 
ceeding empty next Morning; neverthekfs, refomm^ 
Courage, I went forth to continue my Journey, but 
I was hardly out of Doors before tfie Dog pf a^ 
Hoft follow d me for a Penny to pay for my Lodging. 
i had not ar Sous, yet tfee "RafcaJ would nave* taken 
pfF my Coat, which was- of good Cloth, had not 
prie or the At^eers^ whd chanc'd txy pafi by, took 
pity on me, and paid the Penny for me. This done, 
^he ViHanous Hoft* lookfd at nie, aiid a A'd iric if I 
would ferve fehn. ^A't another finie I fliould h^vi 
taken- that Qjeftion for a grofs Affront,, but now, ia^ 
|3ecd, it was altogether feafonablte. rcohfiderda 
while, and being prompted by Hftinger to accept his 
Profftr, told him I would. Eilter then into my 
Houie, faid he, and know that I fliaH require no 
Other Service of you, but to give out Oats and Hay 
to Paflfeflgers, and be fure you keep a good Accomtf 
pf them. I promised I would,, ana fb I was cng?g'4 
pi his Service without further Troijibfe. I:^eht fome 
Time in^ this worthy Employmfent, eating 'fflid 
drinking tolerably weft for one }ri rrif 'Station, ha- 
ting Kttle to do, for *till Night^ paiije, when the 
MdetterT arriv'd; I had only Provender to give out 
tofptnei accidental Paffengfers; 'Twas here f leam'd 
. how :»: manage Oat^'t^p Advantage with hot Water, 
wbich> made theni encfeafe k Thvci: Tv^as here I 
llnderftpod falfe MSaluring, by fweeping the Corn 
pfF with my Hand/ Ot thrufting my Arm* up to did 
PboW^ih it. Twas herd, I fay, ]{ v^s taught to fcr- 
ir?y t\^^^n^tv% ^and, if I were |iot w*ell looked after, 
to'cpwjureiiway Wlf th^^Com. - We'liad fomete 

tbak fint of Gettlemen came to our Hottie^ who 
having nicely cnird Whiskers^ aod no Servants, took 
Httie Care of wbstt was done in thd Stabks, whereby 
I held aa Oppormmty C!o ia^)ofe on them, and rob 
their poor Beafts as macb as I t^As'd ; and which^ 
indeea, thy Mafter expend trom me, whenever 
I had Itieh People to deal with. As foon as we faw 
(iich Fools come, we paid them more than ordinary 
Re^eA^ well- knowii^ we fliould eaflly be able to 
nudce oar ielves Amends. We took Care to put their 
Hories in fuch Pkces where they fiiould fina neither 
Oats nor Hay, and were fare tt^ dumb Creature^ 
amid not find Tongues to difcorer our Fraud. If 
we gave theAi amr Oats, it was juft before they went 
awav^ and that icanty Meafure to6, and fuch as the 
Poaltry had leff. All this was nothing to thofe th^ 
took no Care of it ; bat when the^ eatne to pay, 
WG Ihould be fore to hear of ic on both iide$ our Ears. 
Taxes and Orders indeed were fet'd on the put^kles 
of the Sc^le^Doors, bat little or nothing was ob- 
ferv'd of them within* They were plac d there orUy to 
Gffufy tttat the Officers muft be paid, and that was 
foffioent to eit<tufe all Faults* As for the Quantity 
of Corn the Beafts were to eat, that was a Thing 
regniated by Ciiftom; but then for the Expenee of 
ir^ i always^ ask'd Money for twice as much as they 
teed eat, precendihg I had given them their full Mea^ 
fore, wlwreas 'they had not half of it,^ neveftheleft 
wid) a hdgaUs hum Tr^n/echo, Much good m^y it do tbevn^ 
at the end of my Account, I never failed to gee a few 
Pentid for ifey feif. Some there, were that woiild pay 
me what I demanded at firft Word, altho' th^^y knew 
my^BlH taibettureafonable} whereas others, that took 
rhetnfelves co be more cunning, would needs have 
the landlord caird, that they might reckon with 
him J who, for fear of doing himfelr Wrong, always 
eharg'd more than I had done, fb that have they 
Money, cr have they none, they muft pay to the 

R 4 laft 

'248 The Ufe mid AHiom . FartL 

laft Maraveiis^ fo arUtrary are an Inn-keeper's De* 
mands^ as well here^ as in other Countries. Tis to 
no purpofe to make a Noife^ for they will be fure to 
be favoured by the Neighbouring JufticeSy or their 
Clerks^ with whom they go Snacks. If it ihould 
happen^ a$ it fometimes does^ that a Gneft diiputes 
his Reckoning, and refiiies to pay it^ the Hoft will 
be fure to follow him with a (brt of Hue and Cry^ and 
having taken him^ pretend he would hare fir^d his 
Houfe, ravilh'd his Wife^ or Daughter^ or the like^ 
of which he has always Witnefies ready ; fe.thac if 
the poor Trareller efcapes at lad with paying double 
what was demanded of him^ and begging; his Land:^ 
lord's Pardon to boot^ he may efteem himfelf more 
than ordinarily happy. In all Houfes^ of this kind^ 
there are certain neceffary Animals, call'd Trap-. 
Cuflomers^ wbo are ever at hand to recommend 
what you (hall find little or nothing of when you 
come to try. Moreover^ if you eve* chance to 
leave any tWng here, you may give it! uj), for loft, 
for you will be fure never to hear of it again* How 
many Villanies^ Rogueries, Extortions and Rafcali^ 
ties, are committed in thefe Inns I Neither God nor 
Juftice is fear'd there, and the greateft Grimes for the 
moft part go unpunilh'd. One would think, by diefc 
Practices, ' the bare being an Hoft entitled a Man to 
do what \\6 pleas'd, and to ufe his Cuftomers as he 
thought fit } J5ut for my part, tho' I have been cour 
fiderably Criminal my felt in this relpeft, I judge it 
high time to put an End to thefe Abules. Your Land- 
l(^d, forfooth, becaufe he gives you Meat, Drink 
and Lodging for your Money, believes himlelf em- 
power- d to deal by you as he fees beft for his Intereft, 
Without the leaft Regard to Confcienoe^ or juft Deal- 
ing. I fay, thefe Abules ought to be reform'd, fince 
they diicourage Trade, aha make People afraid to 
gpi about their lawful Bufiriels, for fear of being im- 
jp}s'd on J)y thefe worfe than Highway meQ, I me^n, 
^ ' ' ' Raf 

C . .' J 

BookIL o/ €u:^rnan d'Alfarach^^ 94^ 

RafcalJv Hofts. I my felf have been aa Eye-^Wicnefi 
of mofi of thefe Villanies I condemn^ and if we wer6 
to be told, that fuch Things happened in other Coun- 
tries, and had not experienc'd tnem here, we fhould 
be apt to diftruft the Truth of it, not being able td 
believe that any Nation could be (b tante as to fuffer 
them, or fo barbarous as to aA them ^ yet, here in 
Sfain^ we have daily Examples of this kind. I iay^ 
once more, that a thorougn Reformation of tkefl 
Things is what is moft to be defir'd for the Beiiefit 
of Travellers, tho' hardly ever to be expeAed. For. 
my part, I don't (peak for my feif, I have but one 
Journey to make more after I get out of the Gat 
lies, which, I truft in God, I fiiail before it be lonj^^ 
and that is Home aj^ from whence I lirft came, for 
'tis die Devil of a Life I have undergone, and I hav6 
been fufiiciently puilifh'd for mv DilQJbedience to my 
jMother, in leaving her as I did 

■ J- • .... * 

* ■ • •*•.!• • • 

. ^, , Iv , ' f " ' i . '■« . !■ ' i , ». 


■» ••' 

Ouzman Udves hk Btfi^ and gifts 4 kggitig to^ 
tpards Madrid^ vibtn behrg arrwdj iecomtimtes 
that Employment j Oftd bavittg lemtd laber 
Arts, fills at Ufi uffon a I^fiowffi of Vain Hth 

: nour. 

THIS Oftler-like Life by no means fuiting widi 
a young Fellow of my Humour, I reiblv'd to 
quit it, and the rather, becaufe I look'd upon it ai 
a difhoneft Calling, and what would not in the leaft 
contribute towards my grand Defigns. I, moreover^* 
thought it a very mean Employment, as in trudi it 
)vas, and would not for a thoufand Lives, that any 
QnQ .ihoi^ld ba^^ Teeii and known me in it. Being 

i%9 TimUfiand Mi^ %tl 

f^n ,«he Hi^-Rotd^ I law ereiy Diy Perfiuis as 
youag and a» w^lLdefertiag as 1 go a beggii^, if 
they Had no Money; wlach made me fay to my fel^ 
Wbar a Devil do I ail, that I cannot rave the Wit 
' induftry of thefe People ? Am I a Chidcen^ that 
j^ttld want tlkae Couragpe tliey. ieem to have! 
[ereupoft I took Hearty and leaving my Mailer^ 
went to feek my Fcntmie. The Money I had^ 'tis 
truej was not much, but then i thought I got it 
bomsftly^ and therefdre it wonldithrive with me the 
belter. It neverdieleft did not lafl: long^ y^ long 
eijbQi^ ti> rid my Way a little j^ and when it vras 

5q»s I had. nothing to do' hnr to ibetch out mjr 
\xtBLj open my Haiid, andllhrhgoip^ny SfaouldeiB, 
voth a For tbt I/tmaf Qoi^ Sti j&e. : This was wcmh 
me fefnetimes a Penny^ ibtnetiines a Half-peui^^ 
iometime^ oidy a Grs^ntrcri^^ andfometimes notfatog 
dt all. With a Pemiy or Hatf-pesuiy I co^ld. feed 
with a GaudeamMi; but with your Gramercy Icouid do 
Jiothing at s41y for it ierv'd me tn-ltttle or n o ( t ea J^ 
It was a very ufelels fort of Charity^ yet tliere was 
fomething to be falfl fof it^*thH'e3&ing^ at that time^ 
a general Dearth througt>out Sfain. Of this^ AnJ^ 
ki^a^.: had: Ibine^l^a^ but ^hidh-'Wtt AdthMlf % t^ 
&9^ f^ whsLK^^^tHl^fouod in the Hdsrt of the King- 
Cpijb and ia.the .Xwii^ns ',f^ froitt the. Sea, 

vetified, Librtti'Dios^de la Enfirmedai que hax^^d^Sa- 
fiiUay y de Hambre que fube del Andaluz^h; Thai is^ God 
deliver thee from the Tlague that comes down from Caftile, 
i/hd.frpm the B^mm thuf goes u^fr&m AsidSjbv&i. : i r ' 
c I. prcftied fa littk by this neW Tcadey and diQ 
If^ermngi. of it doft me fb dear, diat at le«^k X re^ 
iotv^d^to qtik it iii like mamieras I had xlone tlieo. 

Sber.. I was hereupon minded to make the beft 
[: cfynU of the (blodies I had on my Back, mid tatcccx^ 
"f^lylfoki fome, and pawn'd others as occafiofl 
^v'4 beginning, .with rach as wei^e of leaft Vie to 


ihcj. By thetei Means^ I foon k^dilcfcf my ftff to k 
tattered Pair of Rrecchcs, a black StAf, mta a' Pair.cff 
iStocktngs with a tfeoufend Holes' iifth^ffl j* ill toWctl 

man V Son of a good Fa^nify 

Be^g thus out of Repair^ ,1 coiifcf tlOt hopi fifj''Ji| 
Mplorc^ in dtiy |0cntlcman's* 'Sefvicfe, which ,v5^4 
nevctthelefs^Aeqtooffdf myAit^ MyAppe^jr- 
tode was too' bacf tdj)rdcyi'e lile tfhitTortaiK, aw^l^ 
miiiflf ha<re htQirdtp^m Kfati that i?^itfd h^vd^dtnlt'^t 
m& intO' his Hbtife' iri this Cmt^tidh: t had' alio 
fcmewhat of, the' Aifc of a Rogu^'^nrf litf Bcidjr th^] 
few riiei but criiecH Seef' that FellbW there,' Tsmo^ i5(J 
be, Hire, warits ,ohV a^ir Opportunity to prtt better 
Clothes upon Ms Backthanhe^-hi*?jpdti/ojcf. Tht 
delpairing of any Eoapldymenr;, fisty tttiit of curnin 
a Spit, I cried tcr ttiy fetf, WH^ft fh^l do ? aii4 A* 
the lame'timei i^^yirigik Confipihy of Bfeggar s be^ipii? 
mj^, who by thtei? m(?fi^ feem'ti w hate far*d:Wetfj 
and ta have lit'd' \prith6ut Trouble or C^e, I refby^ 
to ioin my lelP. with them: Ihttagfh'af Ao^cJ.tJfit 
^*el! i^eceiv'd' by them,, becaufe I Wfte much of ^ 
Kcce with: thfcfh ^ tb Habit j ahd then, as to RoguBf Vi 
ehey could haVe' rio Reafoh td-<?aff mTAbflitiiS's^ 
Queftfon, fmcei^fejBik''d! as mt^ch likbiXnav)5-af tliS 
worftofthem. ^' ^ ' ' ;-- .; . .: ' ^* 

I dM as I (fefign'tf/and it Was* W^eft fdr fti? 1 tell 
ihy Mbdefty oh the Koacl,: fdtii WcaM hst^e beed.i6;^ 
no Service to me^ on this <3ctk(kitu , fr would bi^Mtfef 
been^ too heavy hi 2C Foot^Tra'^etref t6' ^ug a1p%^ 
with him*,- anrfbeffcfes; it Wouldf h^ie^'been ufel^/at 
Mtdrid, where true Mocfefty lodges fnr the SuTjurb^jL^ 
whilflf tbe Falfe only ihhabirs the^ City. Fof my paf^ 
Thanks to my Stafs^ 1 had neitfrer the Shafdow or bneJ 
or tVther, and' vidiicWI were not forty forvt^'ai '^" 
the True is troublelbme^ and fn^kds one oo j|)oL 
Things, whil^ Ae Falfe fervesorify'tb iMptffeUpoiiPdb? 

f52 Th^ Ufe and ASUom BirtL 

^\t^ and render one more Impudent. I became ib 
indeed^ and began to grow wiler than I was before. 
^ k)oVd upon the Adventures of the OmtUty the good 
Supper the Muktitr had^ and the Lois of my Cloak, 
AS 10 many Things that happened to me in my Pren- 
dceihip ; I muft now have other Thoughts^ an4 
iincc I am come to MaMdy muft let People know 
I have feen the Worlds and that I have as much Wit 
in my Fingers^ as in my Head. I had already mad^ 
^Acquaintance with certain Birds of Prey^ tru^ 
Cocks of the Game, whole Dexterity and Cunning 
wejre both to my Liking. I imitated their Example as 
hiuch as I could, and foUow'd them whereioever 
they went; but as I did not well underftand the Map 
ibf the Country, I could not trace them fo nicely as 
J deTir d. I neverthelefs trod In their Steps as well as 
I was able, and went the fame Rounds with them, 
py which Means I foon got a little Money. How* 
j^yd^, becaufe the Wind was not altogether favoura^ 
bi^' fp me, I always went with, my Plummet in my 
Ft^hd, that I might know the Soundings. In the 
jjtiito., time, I fed as well as I could defire. Prog was 
^6t!^ wanting, and I had it rather three times a Day 
than once, but then I muft give due Attendance, all 
Hoiir^ would not do, and I leafn'd that the Guefts 
<^(fre, tp wait on the Treaters!> and not the Treaters 
ek tne Guefts.' We had our Times for Work, and 
ouB f imps for Iflay. 'As I was young, *nd knew Ut- 
Gaming, thp'I had always Inclination enough 
jf had hitherto pradifed nothing but Cock-5l, 
l^krb^e^, Chuck-farthmg, and the like ; but at length 
becott^ifig' mofe bold, 1 ventured on All-Fours, Om^ 
and^Thirty, ^inolof^ and Trimera. In ihort, I3 in a 
little ti^ne^ prated fo much in this School, that I fet 
Up f^ an Artift, and attempted Games of greater 
Ctlriftcluence ; and, in a Word, was fb pleas'd with my 
Courfe of Life^ that I would not have chan^d it for 
any ihy Anceftpr^ ever led. Q what a fine Tl)uag is 


Book II. of GuznEian d'Al^rachc 2$^ 

it^ faid I to my ielf^ to fwim^ and yet no Body hold! 
up my Chin : The Life of a Beggar^ is a Life for b 
Prince, abounding with variety of Pleafiire and Re- 
creation. No Cares moleft it, no Sorrows difturb it ; 
but it glides on in that fmooth and eafy manner, that 
no State on Earth can be more happy. What Poob 
ivere my Parents^ continued I, to give themielves ftr 
much Trouble to live unhappily ! What Charges 
Were they not at, what Plagues did they not. under^ 
o, to iupport their Commerce and Grcdit ? Whac^ 
iconveniendes did they not iuffer for the fake of 
this TUng, calVd Honour ? And vet, after all, what 
is this Mbnour more than a Mill-flpne, to fink hinx 
that has any tiling to do with it ? How many Perifii 
is a Man (ubjed to, that entertains and fears to Ible 
it ? How wary muft he be to take woper Means to 
preferve it ? Always upon his Guard, and (eldom or 
never at Reft ; ever agitated with a thoufead diffe- 
rent Motions. Thefe are the Rocks this Honoiir 
drives us upon ; Thele are the Thorns and Briars 
we muft walk over. We muft never think of Repofe, 
but always be, like Rope-Dancers, with one Foot 
lifted up in the Air. But tell me, prithee, how 
comes it to pafi that my Honour depends on the 
Brea^. of a slanderer, or the Hands of a Villain ? 
Is it in my Power to make this Man filent, or that 
do as he ought ? What HelJ-bom Fury firft infus'd 
this Thing, caird Honour, into the Heart of Man ? 
I have always heard fay. Honour was the ProduA of 
Virtue, and that the more Virtuous a Man was, the 
more Honour he had. If this ber(b, as you will be 
ready to own, then muft a Man be deprived of his 
Virtue, before he can be fo of his Honour j and it 
is impoffible my Honour fliould be taken from me, 
as long as my Viitue remains untouch'd. My Wife, 
according to the oncq ridiculous Opinion of Spain, 
might take away my Honour by lofing her own, 
for then 'twas thought, we Two being but one Fleft, 


qur JE^Kmofics »nfiuA: like wife be one and tbe £une. 
]^ chis IS nopv aa >6}n)lo4ed Notiop^ belieyU>Gtfik 
\>y S^ aiui l^oofs^ jukI froBi which dsle Men of Wk 
find Spnoe have fieea for forae tinsEe reclatm'd. Qap- 

gr dieamuil-^Mt.Man be^ who teows aot M^^atftbi? 
rt of Honour is^ and which is, indeed^ the^JBaoeof 
Xife^ depends on tbe Opinion of the Vdgar^ and is 
ofteotilDes <cof)fer'd o&a R^afcal or a mean Fellow^ 
pr^eifecably to a Geodeman or an honeA Man. You'i 
cry^ perh^3 What (^ifies all^this Preachings whea 
VQu are fafficiexx^y •cpnvinc'd of tbe \&aHdity <^ what 
u ^erted ? A very fi^e GentleBian' truly ! yxpp mr j 
yoji are iatis^d oi thi$ Tr^th^ and yet you fatter 
Vqifirfelf to b$r d^iy kppos'd osatby it^in^y, adhere to 
yc- ^ ^eUgi^uQy^ as if tho Salyaii^ ii ypur Soul 
^ris Q^Qimk4^ m it. Why dqn't you rather make 
iipnbur oon^ft in <^loathit)g the N^ed^ feedi^^ tha 
Huqgiy^ and fiigh^Uke WorJ^s of Charity^ whioh are 
truly iioBOHrablei and. your Duty ; as likewiie are 
|aany other Thiyngs that I fiiall omk^ for fear ^f he^ 
tng tiioiight too^vere upon you ? Can you think 4t ao 
llonour^thatyouhaveabundaflceof Wineinyour Cel- 
iar^ and yet the poor Hofpit^l wants it jthat is^h^ra 
iy you ? Can you think it an HoQOur^ that your 
Hories and Mules are covered and adorn'd ^vith rich 
Trappings,, whilft the. Poor go daily half-ffarv'd and 
loaked by your Door ? Can you, I fay^ talqe it foj: 
nn Ho«Qur, CQ have your Wife Q}ieoLdidly Cloadi'4: 
while your poor Creditors* perhaps, w^ntWeceffariea? 
Yet this is tjie Honour to much priz'd now-a-daysy 
9,1^^ whereof ithere' are but too many ^E^ipmplc^. 


BookIL <f 4Sfizmaii cMl^ache. 255 


Gutman ^^^/ ^« a*^ ^»* Dijcourfi agdnfi Vjdn 
ihtumr 5 and^ 4t lafi^ conm tjoh^ of "P^rfom 
in High Pffisy Mi4 thrir imm ExtraffiM* 

I Was now young, 'tis true ; .but 4s I had naturally, 
a Mind fonn'd for Reflexions, I did not n€gle<ft ta 
make fbme that were reafonahle enough. I Jate the Corner of a Street two or three 
Hours together, with my Hat in my Hand, cxpeding 
that fomebody would take Notice of me j but folding 
few regard me, I could not but rpfleft upon my Em- 
ployment. Very well, quoth I to my felf, for af 
poor Sous I fee thee, GuTMan^ become a Slave to all 
the World, and to be cenain thou wilt be happy 
when thou happen'ft to be fo j but after all, con- 
fider'd I, if I hve at my Ea(e, tod felf 
Happj, what's all the reft, nothing but Whimiy and 
Inia|;mation. This fame Gentleman that lies Idling 
in his Coach, does he fleep better than I, feed hear- 
tier, enjoy his Health more, or pals his Time with 
greater SatirfaAion ? .Undoubtedly not. What is it 
then thou want'ft. Dear Guzman? Whilft I was thus 

occafion to ipeak to me. What means all this Doling^ 
cried he, for a Brother of the careleis Tribe ? Why, 
whats the Matter? anfwer d I, like one that was but 
newly wak'd out of his Sleep : What are you dream- 
ing of? purfuecj^ he j have you a Suit of Law to 
foUow, or a Miffrefi to Court; that you fcem fo in- 

•tent ^ 

25^ TheMe and MUm Part I. 

tent ? Nekher^ I thank God^ replied I^ I have no 
fuch Filh to Frjr. I was only thinking of the diffe- 
r^ht States of Life^ and^ upon mature Deliberation^ 
cannot but efteem ours the beft of any. You are 
much in the rights replied he; and when you know 
more^ youl be yet more iatis^e4> for at pre&nt you 
Have experiettc'a but little of the Sweets of it. You 
have been hardly three or four Mondis with as yet^ 
and much longer Time is requii'd to underftand the 
perfeft Happineis of a Beggar. He^ indeed^ might 
well undemand it^ having been an old Dog at it^ 
and drove that Trade at Madrid for many Years^ 
there being fcarce a Man^ Woman, Turnings Street 
or Houfe^ in all that great City^ put what he knew. 
There are a great many People^ quoth I^^ and^ per- 
haps^ Ibme great Lords^ that do not enjoy theimelves 
fo well as we^ tho' they feem to do fo. There are 
hardly any, replied my Comrade, but what envy 
our good Fortune. Tney have, added I, fbmewhat 
more Honour, but then they pay dearly for it ^ and 
when a Man is cur'd of that Folly, he finds himfelf 
at no Lofs for the want of it. This Honour's a 
pretty Chimera truly, replied my Friend, which 
every Body hunts after, and Rogues more than any. 
There's hardly one of that Gang but would be taken 
for a Man of Honour. Harkee, (aid he to me, do 

ou (ee that Cavalier there ridmg upon his Mule ? 

!^es I do, anfwer d I, and I fee People laluting him on 
all Sides. YouVe miftaken, replied he, 'tis the Beafl; 
and his gaudy Trappings that they falute, and not 
the Man. He was, but t other Day, Footman to the 
Marquefs of N ■■ , and now, forfboth, he's all 
of a fudden become a Man of Quality. If this Gal« 
lantry continues three Years longer, you'I fee the 
Marquifi on Foot, and Monfieur tne Quondam Foot- 
man in his Coach and Six ; and, it may be, in a 
Condition to lend his Mafter Money, if he be honeft 
Man enough to do it. Next fee this Lady ot Ho- 
»% * nouf 


Hook llv cf Guzman d^AIfarai^c: 2$/: 

nour pafs.'by in her gilded Coach, and obfervc hov«r • 
many Obeifances are • made her, yet flie was two 
Years ago biic, an Adrefs, ^nd ftill d&^ the famis 
PartSj thp' on another and larger Stage. She has a 
fiifie Equipage^ ^numerous laickies, a Houfe well 
furnifti'd, and every 'Body ^Imoft goes to pay thteir 
Court to hen * Who thfcn' fhall dare to fay, ihe is not 
a Woman of Honour ! But vyhence came all this 
Wealth to her? From the i?lay-Houfe ? No, th^c 
cannot be, becaufe your Players ufually die poor, 
having no other Trade to truft to, when they are 
difabled from Ading. She is as fine a Woman as you 
kno\!«7 ; 2tndj* it; may be; a Prince has fallen in lovo 
with her. With m iiiy He^arc ; there's no Woman 
fure cMn refufe a Prince, efpecially no Player, There' 
is none of your mS& honeft Wbmen, but would be 
glad tQ have a Prince for* her; BeH-fellow.* But lets 
lay ho more of her, for here's one of t'other Sex 
a coming, that makes no lefs a Figured Your Ser- 
vant, good Maftet" 5eW, with your large bkck Eyes,* 
and your* lariguiflimg Air j with your dFeded Sfcrew 
of your Neck, and your Ihrugg'd-up Shoulders. I 
Know/ not how this Cteafure came to be on Foot, 
for, generally fpeakii^g, he keeps the backfide of a 
Coach warm. Two Fodtrrien follow. 'him, who are 
almoft as great Beauic zi himfelf j and^'tisten caone 
but they ^re of a better Fanrily^ j yet Ks^-e I fcen this 
Gallant fill out Wine' at his Father's Houfe who ftill 
keeps a Tavern. But he knows more thah other 
People do, he underrfands dexterity of Hand ; and 
would you hive an Ace, a Size, or what Tfitow yotr 
pleafe, hel immediately give it you. He runs no 
Rif^ue-fojt it, foif he does it with the. greateft Eafe.- 
Tou maH no* foorier fpeak^ but have what you- eaW 
for.-** If this 2 Game lafts, and he finds Bubbles- e- 
noifgh', yoii'l in a fhort time fee him a GrtandSigniof, 
arrd,'j>erh^ps,^^ne of the greateft Men in his Cofln- 
tty, Xxmk^ Bere ♦comes another. Is th«re any fa- 

* - S rtious 

258 The Life and AWom Psfft L 

mous Preacher that holds forth hereabouts^ that lb many 
good People vifit our Quarter ? See, here's Don John 
of Cafiiliy and a great many others. Don John of 
Cafiiky interrupt I, who's he, I pray ? What, don't 
you know the Marquefi of Cajiile, replies he J Where 
have you liv'd I wonder, that you mould not know 
him? Have not you been for thefe four or five 
Months at Madrid ? I have^ anfwer'd I ; but yet I 
don't know this Don John. Why, proceeded he, this 
Don John of Cafiik^ who was formerly a Turn-Spit 
in Mr. N — 's Kitchin, and afterwards Under-Cook 

to Mr. G , is now become. Steward and Intendant- 

General to my Lord S ; and that yet you Ihould 

not know him ! You fee how he rolls along in his 
Triumphant Coach and Six j never ialuting,any, but 
fuch as have as many Footmen as himfelrj and this 
for fekr of Degrading, forlboth. He, often fays, a 
Man of Quality eafily diftinguiflies himfelf by his 
Equipage. But hold, here comes another, that is the 
vcrieft Ralcal of all. Would you know how this 
Rogue came to be fo great ? Why, he was a Devoto, 
that ran from Prifon to Prifon to relieve the Wretch- 
ed, or at leaft pretended to do fo. This Fellow 
happening one Day to give his Coat to a poor Beg- 
gar, in the Prefence of a Lady of Quality that 
was but juft come from her Devotion, fhe took fuch 
a Fancy to him for this good Office, that ihe had 
him into her Houfe, and made him her Steward, 
giving him the Diredion of all her AfFainsj and 
when (he came to die, which was foon after^ left 
him all fhe had, to the great Prejudice of her Re- 
lations. 'Tis true, he had Suit upon Suit on this Oc- 
cafion, but at length the Will prov'd good ; and tho* 
he was fain to^ part with fomething, to enjoy the reft 
at quiet, he had, neverthelels, at leaft if 000 Ducats 
a Year left. He that you fee now talking to him, and 
pays him fo much Refped, was one ofthe Heirs to 
that Lady, and hopes to be fo to this Ikv9t9. Now 



Book IL of Guzman d'AIfarache, i 5> 

the Bufinefs i$ donfe, farewel Prifons, farewel Cha- 
rity • -there's now no more need of Devotion than 
what will procure a Man Refpec^, and that you may 
have for peeping into two or three Churches in a 
Morning. What you tell me is very furprizixig, re* 
ply I ; but pray^ are there many fuch People in this 
City? .Are there many fuch People? anlwer'dhej 
why the City fwajms with them. Stay^ faid he, 
rifing, the better to view a Man that was iurrounded 
with feveral others, do not you fee that honeft Mai? 
there, with his flaunting Periwig, and a Company 
of Beaux about him"? Yes I do, anfwer'd I, what of 
him ? Why he's the Son of a Taylor, replied he, 
Impoffible, quoth I, 'Tis not imppffible, faid he, 
for rrn fure I know him. His Father has not left oft 
his Trade above thefe two Years, and he lives npw 
in the great Square. But how comes he to have (p 
much Refped paid him, added I ? What makes pep* 
pie bow fo low^ and almoft kneel to him ? O, he's 
one of the Chief Juftices, anfwer'd he, and tbele 
Gentlemen are pleading before him. He has no PC-^-x 
cafion for them^ but they have for him. Would you 
know more ? He has, befides, a great deal of Mo* 
ney-— ' — . A great deal of Money J Yes, doe? thaf 
go for nothing with you ? Don't you know thaf 
now-a-days your Wit, Honour, .Pelert, ti^c. are alj 
meafur'd by Money? No Body enquires what you^ 
true Merit is, but how many thoufand J>Hcats 2i Veajr 
you have. Neverthelefs, it feems jtp me, quoth J^ 
that a pool will be a Fool ftill, and a Knave a Kuave, 
for all his Money. J am not of your Opinion^, re* 
plied he j for as foon as a Man comes to be rich, hfJ 
ceafes to be either a Fool or a Knave, and every 
Body would laugh at you if you pretpnded to be pf 
a contrary Opinion. The Laughers are always pi| 
their Side, that have wherewithal to give the J>pft 
pinner 5 and I am entirely of Mr. N-i— ^ s Mind, wjip 
feid^ that when a Man had Money ^ he had every Things 

S ^ Thif 

2^0 The Life and ASiions ; PartL 

This Chief Juitice, however, was of a different Chara- 
cter; for tho' he was very rich^ he was likejwife immode- 
rately covetous, which is but too common; and 
who, not contentecl. with what he had of his own, 
was yet defirous of ^that of his Neighbour ; and bjr 
his litigious Temper only had wafted part of his 
Fortune. He .thought, rieverthelefs, to patch it up 
again, by an Occafion that ofFer'd, which was this: 
He had an only Daughter very handfome, and very 
intelligent, but whom, tho'. fhe had been long of 
Years to be married, no Body would venture upon, 
Becaufe he would give her no Fortune,, but .what was 
to be got out of the Fire. * At length,- however, a 
Perfon offer d altogether to his good. Liking. .He" was 
Son to a Colledor-General, who had been formerly 
Tip-Staff to this Judge, but not finding Money conae 
in as he expeded, he quitted that Poft j and, by 'down- 
right Dint of Intereft and Importunity, procured 
himfelf the aforefaid CoUeftorihip. He had not 
been long in this Employment before he began to grow 
exceeding rich, making ufe of all his Arts, of which 
he had good Store, tcr further him in it, and where- 
by, in a fliort time, he heap'd up above a Million of 
Francs. He had only one Son, whom he was defirous 
to marry into fome confiderable Family, that might 
proted him, in cafe he fhould be call'd to an Account 
for his Exto'rtions. Now being acquainted with the 

covetous Humour of Mr. N , he, by a third 

Hand, propos'd this Marriage to him, giving him 
to underftand, he * requir'd only the Perfon of his 
Daughter, without any Fortune ; and ofFer'd, that 
his Son ftiould fettle upon her looooo Francs^ and 
that he himfelf would fend him, the Father, ,56000 
more upon good Security, tho' with no Intereft, 
for twenty Years. Tliis Propofal was too well lik'd 

by Mr. N to be. refus'd . by him, and he looked 

upon the Day it was made him, as the moft fortunate of 

► his Life, therefore was not willing to let it pafsbe- 

- ' fore 

Boole II. cf Guzman d* Alfarache. 2^1 

fore the Marriage was confummated, fo afraid was he 
of being depriv'd of that advantagious Offer. But 
3s this Matter could not be perfeded fo fpeedily as he 
defir d, he was fain to content himfelf with taking 
fuch Meafures as were neceflary, and referred the 
reft to Chance^ endeavouring, in the mean time, to 
keep it conceal'd, as'much as poflible, from his Re- 
lations, who were all Perfons of Diftindion, and 
who he knew would oppofe it to the utmoft of their 
Power. Neyerthelefs, as he could ^lot well proceed 
without acquainting his Daughter with it, (he no 
fooner. came to underftand it, but, tho' her Father 
had watch'd her narrowly, fhe inform'd her Uncles 
of it, protefting flie would rather die than difho- 
nour her Blood by fo bafe a Marriage. This alarm'd 
the whole Family, as well on the Father's as Mo- 
ther's Side, who thereupon deputed two of the moft 
confiderabie of their Number, and both Courtiers, 
to Mr. N — - ; who having reprefented to him the 
ill Coniequences of fiich an Alliance, he only an- 
fwer d. He I intend for my Son-in-Law, has Money. 
But as they • followed him, and urg'd their Reafons 
with greater vehemency, he began to grow warmer; 
and at lai^ running about the Hall, where this Con- 
ference was, 'like a Madman, cried out. He has Mo- 
ney, he has Moneys and fo left them, retiring into 
a Clofet, and locking himfelf up. Thefp Gentle- 
men, perceiving they were not like to prevail upon 
him In this Matter, addrefs'd themfelves to the King 
about Jt, whoorder'd, that the young Lady fliould be 
(hut up in a Conyent^ till fuch time as it was agreed 
what Choice Ihe ftiould make ; from whence i^t was 
concluded this Marriage would never happen. . But 
to -return to th,c Fortune of this Son of a Taylor, 
this illuftrious Judge, continued fie, I muft lef you 
know, his Father having got confiderably by his 
Trade, tum'd Merchant, and fo became a Merchant- 
.;?raylor, in which Calling he thriv'd fp mttcbj fcrving 
>' S 5 almoft 

til The Life anJ Atkioni , Part I. 

alntoft the whole Court with what they wanted, 
that in lefs than 20 Years he had 12 fine Houfesac 
Madrid^ a confiderable Eftate in Land, many Coflfcrs 
full of Money, and 48000 Francs which the Duke of 
i--A^^ ow'd him j upon which, nevertheleft, he did 
tiiot much reckon, no wever, the Poft his Son now 
pofleffes becoming vacant, he r^n to that Duke, 
who no fooner faw him but he cried out, extending 
his Arms to embrace him. Ah, Dear Sir, I am hear- 
tily glad to fee you, but I muft beg your Patience 
yet one fix Months longer, and I will be fure to 
pay your Debt to a Doit. I come not on that Ac- 
count, my good Lord, anfwer d the Merchant-Tayr 
lor, with a fawning and humble Grin, I thank God 
1 am not fo Self-interefted, I come rather to oflFer 
your Grace all that is in my Shop, or whatever 
elfe lies within the compafs of my poor Ability^i 
which your Grace may dilpofe of as you (hall think 
fit. But, added he fighing, there .is an .Opportu- 
nity ofFei*s, by which your Grace may naake the For* 
tune of me and my Family by a fingle^Word of 
your Mouth. How, quoth the Duke, is there any 
1 can ferve Mr. Foncetm} (fo was this Rogue's Name J 
I ihould be the moft ungrateful Man in the Worlclj 
if I did not do all that lay in my Power. Be alTur'd, 
yir.Tcfjceti continued he, I win not be wanting in 
any thing that may teftify my Obligations to you, 
and preferve your Friendlhip. Then Mr. PonM toU 
his Grace what his Ambition drove at^ which the 
Duke under ftanding, and being over-joy 'd that he 
hafl an Opportunitjr to difcharce at oncfc an Article 
or '48000 Franci^y which he muft hav^ paid one time 
or other> and that he had frefli Credit ofFpr'd for ^ 
much as he pleas'd, he promised to engage in the 
Matter, which he did with that Xtal and good 
ConduA, that as he was knowing and ;powerml ac 
Court, he foon brought his End about, .dn4 procured 
young Mn tmct tl]ie Bace he now fnjpys^ tho' he 

^ ' under- 

Book II. ' 0/ Guzman d^Alfarachc 21^3 

underftood neither Law ilor Latin. But what is not 
Money able to do ? We fliall never have done if we 
continue long here ; for I perceive others of the (ame 
Kidney, who let up for Lords and Great People^ 
the' they are of as mean a Parentage as Mr. Poncet, 
yet they fill Places above their Birth, and ex^rcifb 
Employments beyond their Capacity. 

Thus thou fee'ft, my dear Guzman^ what thefe 
People of Honour are, or rather, thcfe People that 
are 10 honoured, for there's a great deal of ^ difference 
betwixt one fort and t'other. Perfons of Honour 
owe the Refped we have for them purely, to their 
Merit, "^Whereas honoured Perfons are only beholden 
for theirs to their Pence or their Polls. On the leaft 
Reverfe of Fortune then: Salt meks, and they return 
to their Prjwiitive Water. When I obfervp a Footy 
nian, Vakt de. <lhambre, ox fome fuch-like Fellow, 
quitting his Matter's Houfe to go and take l^olfefEon 
« an ^i^oym^it or Poft has been given him ia 
lieu a£ Wages, I am almoft tempted to ask him whi- 
ther he's goiqg. He might aqfwer me, he's.goii^ to 
fill a Poft has been given him in Recompence of his 
Services, and to griitify his Defert. I underftarul 
you, but are you not Kkewife going to rob the Pu- 
blick ? I rob the Publick ! cries he, I am a Man . 
of Honour. Be as much a Man of Honour as yoit 
will, reply I, it can be nothing but robbing the Pu- 
blick, to putfuch Fallows as you in Places which you 
doni't underftand, and which by no means become you* 
Dp you believe the Exercife of thefe Pofts tp be the 
^me Thmg with brufhing a Coat, tying a Ribbon^, 
Combing a Periwig, filling out a GlaU of Wine, 
spreading a Table, or the like trifling Employments^ 
which yoa are only capable of? Were you ask'd 
when you had your Place given you, whether yoii 
knew what was the Duty of it f Or did you examine 
your Ability in reference to the Execution of it ? 
What fignify all thefe Queftions, cry you, interrupt- 
' • ■ S 4 ing 

2^4 ^^* ^^/^ 4«^ i45/o?ri Part I 

ing me, every one muft do as he can in this World; 
Every one muft get what Fortune he can. They 
that put us into our Places know well what they did 
I warranf yppy and if you queftipn it^ y oij muft call 
theni tQ Account, and not;, us. Right, my Friend^ if 
any oneV to^^Be call'd to Account/tis your honourable 
Mafters ind'efid, who becoming liberal at the Expencp 
of the Publipk^ th§ P|ib|ic^ is even with them by 
charging ' them home witl^ their ill Cpnduift and 
Male-aaminiftratioh, and loading them with Scandal 
and Calumny. j . , >. 

C H A P. IV. ' 

Guzman gives you a long m4 witty ^Difcourfe^ of 
his own Invention^ ^^inji the VanitJ of Honour 5 
touchi/fg^ by the by^ on the Vices of Servant s^ 
Shopkeepers^ Notaries^ ProSors, Judges^ Artifi^ 
cers^ Apothecaries^ Phjfficians ana Lawyers. 

.'TpHpS n^uch fhall fuffice, added hp'; fpr tho' we 
JL Beggars have ^ liberty to fpeak, yet ought we 
• tiot to 'talk on all Subjeds, linlels we would be bid to 
mind pur Scraps, or hourly Employment of cr^ckii^g 
Lice. ' Adieu_, for I fee a Pcrfon of my Acquain- 
tance about to make a Bargain, irid I know he will 
have occafion for my Afliftance. I muft get a few; 
MaravieJi's^ to rnake the Pot boil, or all the Fat will 
be ir| the TPirp. IJereupon he left me to go tp ^hat 
Mah^ arid 1 vvaj much' concern d at it, for J took a 
greaf deal of Pleafure in bearing; him talk.' He was 
a notable gyiining Blacje of Oalicia^ who knew a 
great deal, and was not fo much a Beggar by Necef- 
fjty, as thro' Inclination and Philofophy. He might 
h^vg liv'd better if he pleas'd, for he was born of 


Bool(lL 0/ Guzman cfAlfiwchc.^ 2^5 

good Parents, and wanted neither Money nor Wir, 
but he lov'd Begging, and wou'd not be induc'd to 
leave ic by all th^ Reafons could be given him. AH 
he had told m? >yas frefh in my Memory, and de- 
lighted me whenever I thought on t; but while I was 
bufi'd with Refledions, a Shoemaker came and took 
me off from them, by hiring me to carry a Joint of 
Mutton after him to his Houfe. As I was followin] 
iim, i am^^'d my felf with reading a Ballad I ha< 
found in thJe Sfreet, the Tune of which I endeavour d 
to get. My Mafter hearing me humming, tufn'd 
haftily about, and crv'd,' XVhat, Wretch J can ft thou 
read ? Yes, repli'd 1, I thank God, and write too. 
Write, quoth he mi^ch furpriz'd, is it poffible ?~ Yes^ 
faid I^ ' tis poffible^ for poor as I am, I have been 
well brought up. Hereupon he ask'd me if I would 
teach him to write his Name, and he* would reward 
me well for't. I told . him, with all ray Heart, for 
that would be an eafy Matter to do. But, faid I, 
what will that fignify if you don't learn further. 
That will be enough, repli'd he, for in the Employ- 
ment that Mr. N — has given me for making Shoes 
for his Family ^ri^^/if, the bare, writing my Name is 
fufficient. I have hitherto made ufe of a Man for 
that purppfe, to whom I gave twelve Pair of Shoes 
a Year, but I would be willing to fave that Charge j 
befrdes,^ I* cant but think it a tittle Scandalous, 
thac an Officer in the Government (hould not be able 
to wxUe his Name. I told him, I would teach him 
to write^ if he pleas'd, for one Pair of Shoes, with' 
Whfch he was fo well fatisfi'd, that he would needs 
give me theip before-hand. We were no fooner got. 
to bis Houfe but we began to fcrawl, I finding it 
not an eafy^ Matter to make him hold his Pen as he- 
ought, but at the fame time one of his Boys brought 
Uie a Pair of Shoe?, of vv^hich I had great need. . 
.Upon leaving this Shoemaker, who treated me 
T^ery handfomely tq encourage me to come again, 
'' ' and 

t€€ The Life an J Anions Parti 

and which indeed I promis*d^ I fell into a great So- 
liloquy. Very well Guzman, quoth I^ thou fee'ft 
now what this ferae Honour is which belongs to 
Perfbns in Employment^ and that it is iiUlicient to 
be a Taylor, a Shoemaker, a Footman, or a Vak 
gk Cbamhe, to get into a Place, or at leaft fuch 
Fellows ftand the faireft for Preferment. How 
jnany honeft and able Perfbns have been let afide 
by the fuperior Intereft of thefe Raicals ? How ma- 
ny Kjiights of the refpedive Orders of San Ja^y 
Cdatr^'VM, and Alcantara , have been oblig'd to pay 
them RclpCiSt as they pafs*d along in their Coiadies 
and Six ? How many others of the ancient Nobility 
of Layn Caho and Nunio Rafura , have found them- 
felves poftpon'd to make way for thefe Dogs I Tell 
nie, GuzmanyV/ho now a~days makes ^ Difference be- 
tween thefe hang-dogs and Perfbns of Birth and 
Merit ? - Shall not the former be honoured and refpe- 
Aed, while the latter are flighted or unknown ? Is it 
Merit is regarded in this Cafe ? No, they that arc 

Sreferr'd, have either had Money or Patrons j -they 
ave either robb'd or ferv'd; they are eftablifli'di 
they are in Place ; no more is required to procure 
them that RefpeA is paid them, while PerfcHis, with- 
out thefe Qualifications,are look'd upon as Vagabonds 
and Beggars, 

I fenqr I hear behind me fome Barber drefs'd Hke 
a great Lord, who not being able to endure that I 
fliould take this Liberty with his Fraternity, rails at 
me in his turn. Thefe Barbers are naturally great 
Babblers. This Fellow, impatient to hear me talk as 
1 did, cries with a fupercilious Air, Tell me I be- 
feech you, Mr, Dean of the Faculty, you thfit Ha-^ 
jangue thus like a Schoolmafler, ^ and right or wrong 
wiirneeds reform the World; what Qualifications do 
thefe Perfons want that you treat thus like Scoun- 
drels ? Are they not Men, and have they not Under- 
franding, or common Senfe ? Isj it neceffary they 


BookIL (/ Cuzttian d' Alfoachc 2^7 

fliould be Dodors of Law, to enable them to deter* 
mine Matters of this Nature ? Muft they have read 
over ill the Books of Politicks before they can pre- 
tend to give Orders right ? And may not a Falet de 
Chambtey who underftands the Art of War, be t3i% 
proper to conlmand a Regiment, as a Gentleman ? 
But tell me then, you in your Turii, reply I, you 
that have not been a Captam ab6ve thefe three Days, 
and that only for Shaving well, do you believe 
there's no more in this Art than thrumming a Cuitar^ 
or fcratching a CiterHy which you boaft you have 
learn'd without Inftrudtion? The Myftery of War is 
free for all, anfwers he : 'Tis the only Trade Man 
can arrive at without Pence, or Pater No^er, Birth 
and Quality figiiify little in that refped, v irtue does 
all. Nor is a Soldier jenvi'd for all thisj on the con- 
trary he is better efteem'd, and that with great Rea- 
fon, becaufe Feats of Arras are not fb natural to us 
as the Nohlejsy who feem to be bom for warlike At-t. 
chievenrents. But, continued I, how many Generals 
aad Leaders of Armies have ^ in defpight of this na- 
tural Propenfity in the Nobility to War, been made 
out of Vailet de Chambresy Serving-men, and fuch 
Fellows as thou art, notwithftanding they have had 
no other knowledge of Arms but what they have 
learn'd by following their Mafters into the Field, and 
yet thro* Intereft they have been preferr'd to many 
trave Officers who have been all over cicatriz'd with 
Scars. This, Friend, faid I, is leflening and depretia- 
ting the nobleft Calling that ever was in the World, 
and which is commonly done by fuch as ftiould have 
the greateft Care of it, becaufe they either are or 
ought to be Members of it. And then for the Civil 
Einployments/tis certain none of your Tribe are qua- 
Hft'd for them, for 'tis not combing a Periwig, or car- 
rying a Flambeau, will bring a Man acquainted with 
thole Myfteries. Tis the Bufinefs of a Man's Life to' 
l^rathem^and unhappy is that Magiftrate that ha^aSoc 


V^8 The Ufe and Anions PartL 

or Blockhead to his Gierk. Don't tell me, that fuch 
as are to diftribute Juftice to others have occafion for 
a little good Senfe themfelves ^ for if you do, I fliall 
readily believe you have little or none your felf. If 
ever there be occkfion for good Pilots, tis in the Sea 
of Juftice, where even the moft Expert are liable to 
Shipwreck. And tho' this happens more by their Ig- 
norance than their Fault, yet are they no lefs inex- 
ciifable before God and Man, than if they had occa- 
fion'd:it thro' Malice or Envy. As for thy*part. Bar- 
ber, continue I, thou hadft better kept, to thy Sha- 
ving ^ for if thou believ'ft that Employment and 
Trailing a Pike are the fame thing,^ thou art mifta- 
ken. Jf thou haft a mind to learn this Trade, I can 
^ffure thee it may coft thee dear, and thou wilt not 
find \x fo eafV as playing upon thy Flageolet to thy 
Black-bird. But fince thou art advanc'd to this De- 
gree of a Captain, I dare be pofitive, it will be much 
if thou doft not di%race the Colonel fhat gave it 
thee, . ••' 

. I think. Reader^ I have pretty well play'd my Part 
as to Honour and honourable Perforisj if I had not 
fear'd to tire thy Patience quite out, I had, perhaps, 
proceeded farther, for 'tis one of the moft deplorable 
Things in Civil Life, that fo Sacred a Charader as 
that of Honour ftiould be fo much abused as it com- 
monly is. I will not promife that nothing on the 
fame Head fliall efcape me hereafter; and ifl fliould 
happen to fay any thing more on this SubjeA, thou 
may'ft make ufe of it as occafion fliall prefent. The 
Sheets will be eafy to turn over, and the Benefit I 
hope not fmall^ tho' I ought to fay nothing in that 

. I did a few finall Bufinefles more that Day, by 
which! got a tolerable Subfifte6ce; but at Night, 
either; becaufe I were' not over-well, or that I was 
more; than ordinarily incommoded with thofe Ani- 
mals that love human Flefli, and are inieparable fromv 

'. ^ Beggars,: 

Book II. of Guizman d^Alfafachc i^^ 

Beggars^, or elfe that my Galicia Spark's Stories and '[ 
Morals ran in my Head I could not fleep a Wink. I 
then had recourie to my Soliloquies, and thus began 
with my felf : 1 fee, Guzman^ how the World goes, 
and therefore am refolv'd to have neither Employ- 
ment nor Comrniffiom. I have and^do renounce this 
Thing caird Honour, and will have nothing to do 
with it. Continue as thou art, my poor Guzwan^ and 
let thefe Gentlemen in Places make the World talk 
of them as much as they pleafe. They are only' ad-* 
mitted into Company to be laugh'd at, and one had 
better be altogether unknown. To accept of a Poll 
before one is able to manige it, muft need^ be a ridi- 
culous Thing. If thou art afraid of Danger, thou 
oughtlft not to venture out at Sea.Content thy felf with 
Swimpiipg betvveen two narrow Shores. Do not co-' 
vet toci much Wealth, that thou may'ft apprehend any* 
body's taking it from thee ; nor defire to be Co low, 
as to want ev6ry bodies Affiftance. This laft is abad 
Part to a<ftj 'tis'worfe than the Itch to h^ve nothing, 
'tis having the Plague when every body will fly 
thee. Do noti bpcome a Flatterer to get a Dinner, a 
Trencher-fly is always uneaiy. He muft watch not 
only his Patron's W:ords, .but Adions j nay, the leaft 
Sign muft not.efcape him,if he has a mina to be con- 
tinu'd in favour. Be hot only a good Husband of 
Life, in that, if thou liv'ft well, thou may'ft be re- 
warded according to thy Merit. Why ftiould a Man 
take fo much P^iijs, and be fo folicitous about gain- 
ing ^ Thing which,'perhaps,will vanifh with to Mor-- 
row. Confider, there's neither mention made now ' 
of King Don Pelayos Lord Steward, nor Count Jfo-- 
nanJo Gwzakss Chamberlain, and yet thefe two 
were undoubtedly very confiderable in their Time, 
and, perhaps, as Eminent for their Virtue and good 
Qualities as their Matters. * But fince they are dead, 
there's no more feid of themy or their Merits, than if 
they had never been vx the World, Thou may'ft be- 


37^ The Life and ASUons Part I. 

lieve, Guznfavy it will be the fame thing with thee, 
tho' thou art very far from being equal with thefe 
Perlbns in any refpedr It can hardly be known 
whether thou ever hadft a Being. What Ihould make 
People then make all thisBuftle^ this Stir, this Noifej 
Ibme will do it on account of their Table^ for they 
love to feed well, and fee others do fo at their Ex- 
pence, which they value upon^ pthers 
make all their Honour confift in fine Cloaths ,- and a 
third fort blufter about their Preferments , without^ 
which they cannot be^ fav'd. No, no, Guzman^ thefe 
Things will by no means agree with thee, and with 
fuch Cares in thy Head thou wilt be fure to grow 
Grey before thy time. Leave thefe proud Folks to 
be drawn along by their Coaches and Six, which ne- 
verthelefs reproach them with their Villanies, whilft 
thou art contented to trudge it on Foot. Go always 
as becomes thee, and never wear any thing but 
what's neceffary to keep thee from Cold in Win- 
ter, or to cover thee in Summer. Let nothing ei- 
ther Superfluous or Scandalous be about thee. Eat 
only what's neceffary to fupport Life, for all beyond 
is unprofitable and ufelels, and ferves only to injure 
the Body and Soul. A rich Man does not live the 
longer for being rich, nor a poor Man die the 
fooner for being poor. On the contrary, too greac 
abundahce of Edibles and Superfluity in feeding, is 
what occafions a thoijfand Difeafes. Happy Guz*- 
many nay four times happy art thou, that rifeft when 
thou pleafeft, and ferv'ft whom thou think'ft fit, 
without having occafion to be ferv'd by any body. 
If it be Slavery to hav« a Mafter, it is certainly a 
greater to have Servants, as I fhall fliew in its proper 
Place. At Noon, thou art fure to have thy Dinner , 
ready provided for thee, without being at tne Trou- 
ble of paying either Cook or Butlen Thou art fiOt 
concerned about thy Cloathing,nor fear'ft Ipoiling thy 
Cloaths ; no JLaCe or Ornaro^nts app^r th^te. Thou 

Book II. of Guzman d'Alfafache.^ 271 

art only folicitcms to keep what thou haft , and if 
thou lofeft itj 'tis without Regret* Thou haft no 
Envy^ Jealoufy, occafion for Lying, Stealing, or 
Cringing, to advance thy felf. Thou art always eafy^ 
and 'tis tne fame Thing with thee, whether tnou go* 
eft alone, or attended with Servants, whether thou 
walkeft faft or flow, whether thou laugh'ft or crieft, 
whether thou eateft or not. Thou art always Gay, 
always Brisk, always Nimble, The beft Tavern is 
thine , for therei one may be fure to find thee. If 
' there be a good Bit at the Cooks, that will be fure 
to come into thy Difh, and thy Hunger will not fail 
to be good Sauce for*t. At the Market, thou art air- 
ways beft pofted. Thou art at all publick Feafts, 
and no body calls, thee to account. In the Winter 
thou feek^ft the Sun, in Summer the Shade. Thou 
fpread'ft thy Table, thou mak'ft tby Bed as large 
and how thou pleafeft, and no body comes to di- 
fturb thee, nor does it coft thee a Penny the more. 
Thou art fafe from all Procefe and Suits, and not 
any body comes to trcfpafs on thy Copyhold. Thou 
art neither in Danger of being lii'd for any Thing, 
nor of being lent any Thing, nor need'ft thou fear 
any DecreCyComing out againft thee* Thou need'ft: 
neither apprehend wanting Bail, nor being ask'd to 
ftand for another, which by the by is no Imall Pri- 
vilege, as the World goes^ Thou art above all State- 
Plots, Bufinefs, Conteffs, Quarrels, and the like In- 
cumbrances of Life , which others are tormented 
with. In a Word, well fatisfied with thy felf, and 
contented with every body elfe, no body has the 
Power^ either to mofeft Or difturb thea Well pleased 
with tliy Condition, thou mind'ft only paffing away 
thy Time, and, like a Philofopher, locA'ft down with 
Pity on thofe great Men, who are fo blind as to dunfc 
themfelves above, thee. 

272 ^^* ^(/^ ^»^ Actions PartL 

All are hot born to relifti this Happinefs ; but thus, 
faid ly being about to finifli my imall Refledions, 
God opens the Eyes of the Poor, whilft he blinds 
thofe or the Rich ; thiis he is pleas'd to fend Joy into 
our Hearts, and make us pals our Lives as Agreeably 
as thofe that think themfelves in a much hapj)ier 
State. Tis true, every One has not a Relfiih or this 
happy Condition, but he that has, ought to prize it, 
and never fufFer his Mind to be poifdn'd with Chi- 
merical and Ambitious Thoughts, faoh as mine were, 
as you will find by what follows. 


C H A P. V. 

Guzman feffs htm hefervd a Cook^i^ and by and hj 
takfs occafion to refk^ upon feverdl Prdfeffions. 
He condemns Gaming and Qamejiers. ffe re^ 
lates a fmall Theft of hk. He difcovers the 
Rogueries of Stewards^ Cooks, Butlers^ and other 
fkcihlik§ Officers ; and acauaints you how much 
Great Men are commonly abus'd by their Servants. 
He fpeakf of Kings, and their miferable State ; 

• and fhttos the Vanity of Inferiours contending 

* mth Superiours. At tafi, he condemns thofe 
' Ma/iers that uje their Servants ill^ and tetli the 

ill Conjequences of it. 


IEnjoy'd this charming Liberty/ fo much bpafted 
of by the Philofophers, when the Devil^ always 
an Enemy to the Repofe of Man, put it into the 
Head of a curfed Cook, to ; think me piropfcr for a 
Scullion-Boy. He knew me, he was one of my 
Matters that us'd to employ me. I often made him 
laugh by Ways I had, and Jefts I utter d. H& 


I 0/ Gasman cf Al^adle. tys^ 

tKou^ht me an honcfter Fellow than moft of niy 
Companions^ and that ;nade him lore, oic^ Omf 
uij, whichj indeed^ v(is. an unlucky pn^ for me. 
after I hafl ^iari^ed honie fbme PoVil^pr ^r him^ and 
he had given tUt lioth Meat axid J)rink^ as was hi$ 
uflial CvAotAy he began (b, dijcourfe mo a$ fo|-t 
lowi^.^bich hein^ very fuBtil and deligniqg^ could 
not but hftVe be^n ftildied £Q»r fome tihie : ^ Friend 
^^ Gu7;m^,[ ijixoik He^ wjlt thou always be a Beggar, 
'^ an4 c^rry a B^^ *bout all thy Life lotag. 'InQV 
" haft Wit, thpu look'ft like one of a goojl Familyi 

and feem'f^ to have an Inclination to Good^ there^ 

fore muft be taken Care of. "TU High Time, and 
!^ at tl^e Age thou art of, tbojk} oughc'ft tp have begurjt 
' io Work. I have takon i Fan^y to tljee fipm' |ne 
f! Exadnefs and Fidelity t have obfery'd tn^tipe, ^pa. 
f ^ would willingly aifift tKee^ |n becop^^ng fomethii^ 
'^fuitabletothyM^nt IflaWord,Iliavefix'dmy%o 
'^ upon thee to be my ScutUbn-Boy, wl^ofe Place haji 
|f been vac2ii\t for fbme tim^ ; ana it tibou ^ilt approKfj 

thy felf k diligent tad, tho(^ may ft leam aTra^e 
" Will \k i Support to theo/o;r ^ver, ii?a wbiiph iHoiji 
" Wilt neter think thy felf MotjgK obliged to flje foir.» 
^ Thoii ^rif Ibon be fenflble of iKe A-ctVint^ge f4 
^1 the KJtdiih, Whiqh Is the fur^ft Sfep to Preferment 
^ inany tjehtleman'^Ho(ife. T^houneed'ftonly pl^i^ 

thy Iviaftei^ I^ate. Qi^e htn;^ a little 9x9,9 Aagpv^ 
^ now ina dien fo ^e ftim occafion tp ^i^eiif 
li ^ J^^^> '^^ iodetlnies prefent jpne or hi$ lii/ii^ 
^ftrene$withagooaFl4tei>rtw^^ andtfiy BuTiineAis 
^ abncj^ tl{y Forf^iiie is made from that ypty * *^ 

i. 1 my leif bjtve ^oWft bculftott^-Boy to 3 pnvjii^ 
^^ Centl^ihjin * I p^i M Aether, he did not once. 
L wear at-lVery,btttnoW tliptt lee'ft Kaw heis|>referra^ 
. ittftcad of wfcaring a live jy, h^ Ms (i^ l^^ J^^I^' 
: lowf that follow Itm In uv^$ wheret^r hi J&e$^ 




274 Th^ life and A&ions Pan L 

^^ Ah« GmmMu^ GuzmMj, a CoQk is not fb mean a 
^^ Poll as thou may'ft itriarine ; I know one^ now-a- 
^^ days^ that is Cbef-Mininer to a Great Prince, and 
^^ his Fac-Tott00. fo high his Virtu?^ and a Uttip In* 
^^ duftry^ has adyanc'a hifl[j. I have Orders fropi. my 
^^ Lord: to look out for a good ScuUion-Boy^ and I 
^^ think I have executed my Commiffion well in 
^^ finding thee. The other Boy we had^ had the fiood 
^^ Fortune to pleafe my Lady, and (he has preferred 
^^ him to be her Page. Can ft thou defire any thing 
greater at firft^ and yet 'tis the leaft Pre^rment 
mou m&y'ft exped^ in that thou art a hanc^mer 
'^ Youth than he^ and haft infinitely more Wit. ^ Who 
xould have thought that I^ who have made fo many 
fine Reflexions on Honour^ on Places^ and on aU 
other Varieties of this World> could at laft hav^ fuU 
fer^d my (elf to be led by the Nole3 and imposed 

5K)n' by the airy Vifions and fpecious Pretences of a 
. afcalhr Copk. How frail is Man ! and how different 
when he (peaks him(elf3 and when others fpej^ to 
him ! How little a matter di(reliihe$ all die Swpetsof 
tife ! A little Wind ift thy Head brings all thy Af- 
fairs into Di(brden In a Word, 'tis the Deftiny of 
3^an not to know when he's well, and to be ever 
hunting after Misfortunes, and this becauila he al- 
ways oefires to be in a better Condition than he ought 
to be, or what*s neceflfary for hinu I fay to my fclf^ 
I am defirous to taft a little Preferment ; I rifqge no 
great Matter, and if I do npt fuccee^ in it, thf (Sate. 
of Beggary is ftill open. I can't well fall lower, and' 
that^s my Comfort. I had a mind to haVe a little 
Honour, to (ee what would come of it. X agreed- 
then to the Propofal made me> biic that not without' 
Regret, or fear of repenting of my !FoHy,.for ex-* 
changing my liberty fo readily for the Poft of^a. 
ScuIKon-Boy to a great Lord. I was immediately 
carried to pay my Re(pe<9:s to bis Lord (hip, and to fc 
admitted amor^the Number of his moft bumble Vai^ 

BookE tj Gtusmati df Aifarac^hie. t^^.. 

Ms. He had already had a Chara^ker of me : So ' 
that I no Iboner araeard^ but be cried^ with a' grave ' 
and gibttffi;^ Air, Whar is the Pleafbre' of diis Lord of - 
Toca-R&faf (I^ Ckttbs.) Has he any Pfetenfionsat 
Comt r Woold he be m«le a Knight of the Qdim 
Fkece^ orwhat other Order ^ Has he a mind to mar- 
n any Marchione& or Counted? Is he in fmrfor 


thefe CompKments^ which I plainly perceived were' 
Jeffs upon me^ were enough to have difinounted amr 
one 6t Itfs Afiurance than my (elf j but I ftood Bhif^ ^ 
and, havinjgtnade him a^tfaomand'Oinses^ anfweKdy- 
with an Air as grave a$ his^ MvXcnx]^ 1 am^dierLord^^ 
of *Sifiaf, ana your moft faun^le "jfHr'A^^ 
Servant; and being likewife Knight of jWifrTolcda 
the Begjgiiig^Ordei^ have no greater Ambition than^ 
to ierve your Lordmip in your Kitchin^ in quality c^ 
your fiuthful Slave and Scu&ion-Boy. This bold ktt^} 
iWer from a Youth he thought was altogether filenc-d^* 
pleasVi: tiim exceedingly^ and made nim tO' lauglr 
neardly ; whereupon he told me^ I was welcome^ andt' 
that \ had nodiing to do bur to ftnre him faithfully,. 
^ he would take Care of me: A common CompH-- 
ment with great Folks^ whole Sight. neverthele& 
yoa fliaU be no fooner ourof> but they forget both' 
you and their Promifes^ 

Now am I become a Graduate in Scullionry^ wii!il 
^ white Aprott before me^ a Napkin-Cap on my^ 
.Head^ my Hair tuck'd up under it^ and a Rnift \n! 
tniy Girdle to fliredPaffleyw^h. I had not yet1eiarn^4^ 
to Lard^ beca«fe that was a Maftcr-itroke^ and 'twas^ 
fiot cvew one could do it» Whilft I was thus etn*> 
plov'd^ I faw the Servants coming and goings and) 
*notl of them, bulled in abuficg- their Lord one wayj 
>f other. ^ One would have Bggs^ another wouKi' 

We Butter, a third fore Meat, a fourlh a.J?i»f^«^i 

T a a fifth 


^^e the Life and Aaiont ¥aic 1 

a <iifth a So$tfe^ and a fixch a good chopping-piece 
of Paftv^Cnift. Every one was for having wnat he 
deouinaed^ and another thing, dio* good in its KiniL 
v^ywldnot ierve hts turn. GoodGod^ faidi to my Cwi 
What a Confufionis here i And what a Havock do dieie 
Raicak make of their I^ord's Edibles ? If any one hap- 
pens to go in anodier Road^ dieyl be fure to hoot 
nim5 and count him either a Blocknead or a lazy in- 
im;nificant Wretch. Theyl fpread a thouiand lies 
abotit him to make him odioiis and contemptible, 
and at laft, it may be, get him tum'd away for his* 
Hotfcfiy* Again, if you turn your Head on the 
Cfhtt fide, you meet with a pilfering, flothful, idle, 
drunken Drab of a Wench^ who, tho' ihe does 
IThtngs ever fo odly, you nmil Jiever call her 
tQ account, l>ecaufe flie, forfboch, is Favourite or 
JKiece to Madam the Goveraante o^ Houii^eeper, 
^ho is an old Toothlefi Jade, with too much Autho- 
rity, and too little Underftandii^. She ihall always 
have a Troop of Kindred at her Breech^ who are 
fure to have Tic-^Bits enough j and when (he wants 
Wine, it muft be the jRirongeft ibrt, becaufe her Sco- 
fOach's cold, and (bmetimes fhe wiU have Pepper and J 
Qinger boii'd in it to warm her fuperannuated Con^ 
ititution. Now, (aid I to my felf, is not all the 
World like thefe He and She Servants, who does not 
eodedvour to rob, cheat and pilfer what they cau? 
I need only go out of J^oors and look ^bout mc, and 
Iffiiall be fure to meet with either falfe Weights or 
fiilie Meafures, either in the Markets or Shops. If 
fe go a little higher, and take notkeof the greater 
pn of Hogues, who can be more fi> Chan N^mes, 
yho.will (ell their very Souls for a few Ducats ? What 
can be mere Mercenary than their Tongues, or more 
^geroijs than their J?ens ? If you leave thefe Fcl- 
tews and gb to'Attomeys, what will you get by that? 
TPhey'l pJuhge you into greater Difiicuities than ever, 
and only le? foui liave Usi and Uncerodnties-for 




kn. (f Guzman dfAlfarachc. a 77 

your Money j but I can affure y oii^y oul never fee nn Ertd 
iof yottr Caule as long as you have a Penny left^ and th^ 
erhaps you may. Go to the grave Councellor^ and 
c'l tell you a fine Tale for your Gold, yet never dp 
you a jot of Service, but rather Differvice. If he giv$s 
you the beft Advice in the World, he! be fure to be- 
tray the Weaknefe of your CJaufe to your Adverff- 
ry for as much more. He's eertainiY a Rogue if 
tfiere be one in Nature^ and icnows aU the Quirk$^ 
jSfaifts and Tricks, to prolong a bult. But pray teU 
me, Mr. Pe^^, you that go every Day to Mafi^ ah5 
confefs your felf^at leaft once a Month, how can you 
have the Conicience to plead for one that never pay^ 
any Bodv, nor cares what becomes of his v^rcr 
ditors ? Who pretends, there's thg Lord knows wha^ 
owing to him, «id therefore cares not what he owes* 
Who, becaufe oije Man has injured him, will let 9 
houcfr^d ftarve for want of their due Debts. How 
can you, i fay. have the Face to go to Chprch lo 
frequently, ana yet jgive your Advice to opprefsho- 
ueft People ? Where is your Cdnfcience, and Inlpiti? 
of your flours and your Beads^ whjit Religion dp yon 
pretend to be of i But I Ihall fay more to you irt^ano- 
thcr Place, and therefore, at prefent, will releafe ybu, 
I muft now talk to a certain Judge, who lets up for. si 
judicious Perfon, and pretends to underftand every 
thing, yet janderaands nothing, nor does any Body 
underftand hin^, fb, well he expreiTes himfein Yqu 
ftouid have &en him while he was in purfult of thq; 
Poft lie enjovs, and you wo^d have found him as. 
tame as a mtll ' simong Heifers ; but when once he: 
was poilbfs^d of his Place, he rav*d and bellovy'd ?- . 
bout witfcour Provocation. H5 Mras contentecf befpre; 
with a patcli'd Habit to kee* fitmielf froip Thieyesj! 
but msfw you fee him all fix Vehrcif, from Mead to 
foot; and if he, wears CIptK there V not zrxySj;^; 
imoagh ih^all 5e|wi« topleafel^im. Butatwiiofe^ 
^xben9e do^s'he 4o all thfe ? Why, at wh6& fhdutdl 


278 The Life mufASim farti 

he^ but at chat of the Publick. Wherever heiightsj 
he muH have either a Leg or a WiQg. He makes no 
Step unprofitably. He has Bufmeib every where^ 
and every where fomething to fay. No Body can 
, appear {nnocent before him^ and if there be Mooey 
10 the Oi&j no Body can appear goilty. 3Ut us^go 
en. Here's an Apothecarv behind his Counter^ m 
.him if he has not fuch a JDrug> or fuch a Medicine^ 
and he'l be fare to anfwer you^ Yes. He won't cry 
iiinkiqg JFi(h. and tell you he has none that's -^ood; 
fir, pernaps^ be may give you fomething like ic^ or 
;St may be yxtt contrary to it. As forOsls, Synms^ 
diftiH^I Waters, and the iike^they are generally ipotl'd 
With him. ana yet he'l juftify them^ and tell you .the 
iGood and Bad mufl; go together. I will not anfwer 
for him^ that he (han't Poifbn you rather ^thaniiot 
take your Money. It is but makins jip thefe Dnxg^ 
l^ood or ,bad^ according to the rsefcription : and 
t/^h^ther they do you good or harm^ cuse ^r kiv^ "'tis 
nothing to him, he's paid let it go how it wilL If 
he can but put tnem up neatly^ and icnd them away, 
fpeedily^ 'tis all he cares for. Expedttioo only is re* 
quir!d of him^ and tho' the Diieafe be proloi^'d by 
the Medecine^ hel tell you he can't help it. But 
here comes the Spruce Phyflcian^ who takes care of 
^\lj and who having enquir'd d the Apothecaries 
Boy if his Prefcription nad been ri^hdy db&rv'd^ 

S)es away contented, perhaps, without an Anfwer. 
ejct the Patient is vifwd, his Pulfe fel^ his Tongue 
view'd^ and theie QuefttOns put to him ; Have yoa 
Hept well ? Have you been at Steol i Hftve yoa nxsf 
Stomach? All thefe are anfwcfd.WAth a fltake of 
the Ilead. So much the woife. Thea the Urinal is 
brought forth, and no jComfort is ftamd there. • A* 
nothejr Ptefcnptioo tnu^ be Povnd. ims9e<fiaaelyj 
after v^hich, a Turn or. m> is t^ea in the Rpom, 
but ftill nothing corner wA, Bad^ tiie Patient m^ 
ci^e if btBejr Care W «ot tsken* ^.myladyde- 
' ' . * firci 

BdotE c/ Guzman d'Alfarachc: %^i 

lires youwould pleafe to accept of two TiJ^oUs. Ah, 
there was yio occafidn for it : What I db^ is more out 
of Friendlhip than Intereft: but fince your Lady 
will have it lb, I mnft. obey ner. You may tell her, 
Sweet-heartj her Husband is in no manned of Dan* 
ger, knd that he'l be a found Man again after two 

on her, to do her, or the Gentleman her Husband, 
irfiat Service t am aHe. ^ 

t return to my Kitchin, for t can fee nodung but 
V illame$. Thefts and Rogueries, in all other Phces^ 
as well as there. Courage^ Guzman^ here's BacoQr 
broiu^ht thee to cut intofmall Slices for Larding ; 
ru do it I wi^-rant, ^d be fure to take Care of my. 
feif to boot, according to Cuilom. 1 was like a 
Ox^Jn a Pye, in tbb Hoofe; I depended only on 
the Cook, who was married, and lodg'd and eat a^ 
t)art with him and his Wife, that 1 might be the 
readier at hand when he wanted me. At my Hours 
of Lcifure, ^tis true, 1 w« willing to oblige every 
Body, being hatarally oMdous and good humdur'o, 
which made me belov'd by alii anal confegucntly 
i'eceiv'daigreat many fihall Gratifications from the 
Scnrama of both Sexes. I perfotm'd their Commit 
fions fauhfully and fecretly, which procured me a 
good Opinion throughout the whole Hbufe. Now 
as to the Kitchin, you muft know I always came 
firft into it, and went laft out of it j and, in a Word, 
I acquitted my felf fo well of my Duty, that no 
Body coidd be better fatisfied with a Servant, tUm 
tny Mafter feemM with me. This, you may imagine, no findl Trouble, but that's nothing, ono 
iofps nothing by that in tne End j if ope is not re- 
warded, one has at lead ' the Satisfa^on of having 
done well, and that's fomethtng* For me reft, we 
are to refer bur felves to Hereafter, whenwefliall 

T4 ts 

it^ Tk9 Life mtJ AMioftt im% 

^ furely recompencd. Well^ what I can fay far* 
ther is, that fetting afide the &ggifig*Trade^ which 
is certainly one of the moft charming in the World, 
and which vA\l adhiit of no Com^ibn. there canC 
not be a tileafiin^r than tjiat I drate iii tms Kitdiin^ 
for ^fffidcring I h^d been bred to goo4 Chcer^i I let 
ho Tit-rBits elcape me. ' No Phce'came |n or went 
6iif bur I had a Lick' A it^ T moft idWaVs tail thd 
$atiee^ to fte whether ' it was g^> ^5 tbe ro^ 
cr BoiFd Things to knbw whether they wtn well or- 
dered. My Mafter was^ Indeed^ it fiuxt0U5 Cooki 
9n4 all the Treaters of St. (Sik/sy St. bminUk. thft 
Cf^td of the Stm, the Great Market-Pb<fe and TMdh 
Street, were but as fo many Sutlers to - hifii. I 
might have Ifccn happy enough^ if* it hid* nr 
btfcn for that cuffed 'Humour or Gaming which 
fel! lifto« upon feeing th^ Lackies and Pages pUfj 
At firft I fpent onTy noW and then a quarter of an 
Hour at It, and ^hat at iuch^ Times as I could beft bd 
fpar'd ; biit at laft I came to fit* <5ut whde Nightsi 
knd thought imr lelf wrong'd if I were checked for 
it. ' ' HoWever3 fcarce any Body would do me that 
Ihjuiy as to acqvudnt nly Mafter Virith itj liiid wfaeit 
they did^ I had always an Etcufe at hand' which 
ierv'd'hie inftead of a Rcflifon. But the wotft was^ 
I ipjferally loft my Money,' and if I would proceed; 
I niuft ^Amct Com or Steal, as others did. I plainl^ 
law this- Ijife wpuld lioc laft, and ihy Afofter In&ig^ 
is gresLt a Rogye as any Body, I |5ropos'd his Exam^ 

£le for my tuture Subnftfeapc. There^s no Vice? bdt 
rhata GamefteHsguUty of: Ganun|; is a Sea, M^erei 
|n all tfxe leflcr Wycrt df villany empity themftlves: 
A Qamefter is utterli^" mcapacit^ted to do Gopd^ and 
fe always endeavouring at Evil ^ You muft never 
believe a Word that comffs qtitof hi'sMoiith. HeV 
always either Lying, or TJjfeparing to do fy. He' 
knows not What it is to have a Friend^ for he ipare$ 
4ot eveft ht$ heaxeft Relations. An boxicft ManV 

ti * « 

of Gaiam a MtaraFha zl^t 

Reputation he laughs at, and He criesnp the Dext^ 
ricy of a Villain. The Game^ fays he^ goes alvtrayi 
%o the cunningeft Fellow^ and it is not redeem'^ 
Knavery iq him it^ thp' unwarrantably;, btt 
Addreil. I forgive him th^t knows more than I^ th^ 
I may hdiVe the like. F^P^r when it comes to my 
turn. Gaming is a' Battel^ \ifherein (he ftrongeft 
Sidie b^ |;enerally the better. Bi^ ypu diOionoiK^ 
your Fdmily by this ignoble Fragile* My Family ! 
a Triftg. What Family is there thith^^mc either 9, 
Rogue or a Whore in it^ and muft $:he whoie Race bft 
diihonour^d fpr the Fault of one t t game oot witb 
intent to Ipfe^ but tp winj and whatever contribute 
to that^ End. ii w^rf Ratable with me. OtherwU^^ 
bow would fo many honpit Fellows live^ that depen(} 
ivhoUjr on Play ? Ti^ impoffible tp game long, with^ 
but being $kiirul at' it ; and if Stratfigem^ are aUow'4 
in War. Why mayn'| they as wpll l^ tolerated here? 
This isreafoning like one that looks |(pbn bis Nei^^ 
botur's Goods 9s hU <:>vj^n« l^ut let him Ij^ve an ^ 
Jtland^at Play, and ^e wh^t a deplorable Figitfehii 
makes. He Frets, he Storms, he bwears, and ffiy$s 
lilmfelf to the pevU i thoufand tunes an Hom 
ta recover his loft' Fortune ; odt leeing all ineffedual; 
he ^f S hoti^e mightily difcontented, and will C^n 
tto ffoay. Every thing difpleaie$ and torments hiijti 
He 'ihuts himfeif up in his Chamber, ^nd, cakiM; 4 
F^cl ef Cards, Plays the Game ^yer with hfat^ 
fel^ to fee wjier? his Fault l4y. Jiavipg ftnmd it, ^ 
lifts dp his , Eyes in a gres[t P^ffion, ^d tears tho 
treacheroli^ DeVils in 4 thpufand Pieces, eating dHitiK 
Bit by Bit after he has dto^eJ Thus he fpen^greft 
bare 'of the Nighty fpr 31e?p he cannot ; and next 
.^Uuning getting up betimes, goes to ^e iame GaH 
fnmg^^i^^ale again, w|iere h? had loft h^i Money^ 
flcmandin^SRsv^^gc; Which is 0iven, him, %nd Jm 
)ie lofes everyreimy he hadrais'd'by pawning his 
Wife'$ J^w^lst Th^v done, he returns home onc« 

««2 fU Lifa dnd AStiotts ; PartL 

tnore, carfing, bldpheming an draving like one PoC- 
^s'd ; and all this whhout fpeaking a Word to any 
9ody. He's no'fooner within Doors^ but he redoubles 
%is Imprecations in a terrible m&nner^ an4 nothing 
%rfR Tatisfy t)r pacify him. If he's ask'd to eat. he 
trfafes it. He throws himlelf upon his Bed. aitd im- 
JRfiediately Madnels takes fuch entire Poueffion of 
liim^ that he^ fit for nothine but Bedlaftf. O Man, 
tiiow frtA thou art ! I flioulof nev^er have done^ if I 
ctttaded this Chatafter as far as I might rea&nably' 
'do J but let no one believe I form this out of my 
«>wii HtBdj that this is a Child of my Imagination. 
i paint after Nature^and this is nothing but what 
land every Body eoe has feen more than once. It 
is a true Ori^al^ as all the other Pieces are^ that lex- 

e(e to Sale in diis my Shop j where I have MirroUrs 
' til forts of !^eopie, by wiiich they may reform 
themfdlves, if they think fit. Life is mort, and the 
pMftice of this Virtue a Utrle difficult. Every one 
eretends to be petfed^ or, at leail^ to have but very 
few Faults. I nave one Shoulder a little higher than 
t'other^ but I am not Hnnch-back'd for all that, for 
HO Body knows it befides my Taylor and my lel£ 
We may hide pur Defeds if we wiU, and tho(e that 
are not too viiible may be ealily conceal'd. My De« 
fy6t was chiefly that of Gaming, which engag'd me 
in a thott&nd other Rogueries, and became both my 
Crime and my Puniinment. I could not get rid of 
tins pernicious Inclination, and whatever I got^ 
either by fidr Means or foul, I (hould be (lure to 
)pk that way. Money's only of ufe to Good Peo- 
|rte, who know how to employ it well; but as for 
Ited, it ierve^ meerfy to ruin and deftroy them. It 
|a with them, as with fome Creatures who fuck Ve- 
sdm from the faiQe H^rbs and Floweri that Bees 
jawke Iloto^y ot . 



BooklL ^1/ Guzman d'Aifitrache. vS^ 

I began to pick up Knowledge in my Profe^bn 
of a Scullion^ and might have tak^n my Degrees iq 
a fliort time, for I was well belov*d*by my Nfafte^;, 
had it not begn for this curled Humour of Gaming. 
In fine, it quite fpoU'd me : it taught tte to Pilfer^ 
to whidi, however, I was but tootnudi enclia'd na- 
turally } and vrtienever I had loft ^ my Money, | 
would be fure to have recourfe to Msans to get iQOfC 
without turning Coiner. 1 would caft my Eyes all 
about the Houfe, to iee if I could (py any thing 
that misht make up what I was t)nt of Pockefc 
Small Matters in the Kitchin were an aAut^d Penny 
to me, I never let them flip, for I need orily take 
my Timc^ and they were my own. This was aUb 
what I were perfedtly gifted in, for I itianaj;*d my 
Thefe fo difcreetly, that no Body, in the Hotife had 
the leaft Suspicion of me. One Day, my Mafter 
having treated feteral Friends of bis, good Bottle«t 
Companions like himfelf, widi a 0)Uation^ and gi-^ 
ven them good Hams, and other refifliipg Bks, to 
make them Tafte their Wine, I, upon my retufii 
from the Kitdiin, where I had diwie ray Work, ve- 
ry forrowfiil to think I had not a Penny left to play 
for a Quarter of an Hour, found the Cdaft was 
dear, ,tho' I faw there had been good Chear. TTie 
Gnefts were gone, very Gay you muft fuppofe, but 
the ' Doors were left wide open, and me Table- 
Qoth not taken ayvay ; fo that me Bottles, Plates^ 
and the like, remam'd in an ag;reeable i^ibrder^ 
Amon^ thefe lay a Stiver Cup that' they had dranlf. 
out ©fi which one Nvould have thought might havc^ 
been taken better Care of for the v aljue-lake. As 
far my Matter, iW I did not fee him, I heard him 
rfain enough j for heving throwij himfelf on the 
Bed, he 1^ (boring like the Drone-Pipe of an. 
Organ, and madi^ aH the Houfe ring with t1^ 
KoUk. My Miftr^> poor Womaa^ who deiif^dl 

to imitate }2«rH«$bati<i mall IMigs^ awf foVd a^ 


a$4 m Ufe 4nd AStifmf Parti. 

BoQte it w^ as h^ lay by to keep him Compiny^ 
9fi|^Derhap$ vras qo more fober than he. The Sii- 
yer Cup tempted me : FIe(h is frail^ quoth I^ efpc- 
9iaIIy in one that has loit his Money^ and knows 
not where tp get moi:e to Game with. As I came 
in uobb(erv'd^ fo may I eo opt^ and nothing is to be 
neglejfted^ for in great Affairs a Man cannot have 
^00 great Precaution. 1 went into my Mafter's 
Chamber to fee if he flept ilill, ^nd found both 
him and my Miftfefs as fail as a Church. I then cry'd 
foftly^ Mr. Cup, J mjift beg your Pardpij j and fo 
tQpk mm^ aqd Jut him into piy Pocket. Then I 
return^ to the ]sjFchin, where I found my ielf £mt 
ploynjent tiU fuch time as my Mafter caige in, ibmct 
yrhat recovered from his Debaucii, but his Head ak'd 
terribly. He was put of |iufnopr, and immediately 
pegan to Quarr^ with me for laying on a Fagot 
too much, telling me, he believ'd I had a mind cq 
£re the Houie. i made np Reply j an^i as he was 
liot in a Condition to V^rk, I got ready the Supper 
as well as I co)|)d,, and ferv'd i% i)p j. which done, 
we retired as uTuaL My Mailer was good for no- 

J^iWACUKIJ KUW19M tlAW^ V^aUtW \fK AL, L&IV/ 4. iW^Uf U Itf 

know nothing of the Matter, therefore! ask'4 h^f 
what ihe ^il'd. She havipg' always put great Confi- 
dence in tne, told me the Lois of the Cup, aq^ that 
ihe had Iook'4 all oyer the Houfe fpr't, b^t could not 
find it. *Ti$ not fo much for tl^e Valne of it, ' quoth 
fhe, but the PaHton jt will put my Husban4 in when 
becomes tp kno^ i( is gone.; He'l be ready to 
knock me o'th' (teiad for t. I eno^your'd tp. com^ 
fort her all I could,, and indeed was the prppereft 
Perfpn. I told her, there was g* liemedy ^c alt* 
'ipiings, and that this Cup was i|ot4b extraordinaryj^. 

tedk It of €ttzmah d^Alfarachc 2IB j 

vfs'd her to get a new one made of the fame Weight 
and Fafliion^ and fhe might pretend to her Husband 
Ihe had changU the old one^ or got it new boifd^ 
becaufe it was fl^'d and tarnifli d. The firft Pro* 
pofal (he lik'd Wft ^ btot as ihe could not well go 
oQt^ b^^dfd her Husband was apt to be jealoai^ tho* 
(he w&s not extraordinary handfome^ (he delir^d me 
td take that Task upon me^and go to the Goldfinittiks^ 
and iee if I coula Meet with one any thing like |t^ 
for ihe faid^ I miiil needs know what Ibrt of Cup 
ic was^ having feen it fo often. I told her^ I would 
db all that lay in my Power to ierre her m th!^^ or 
any thine elie ; and fo next Morning betiiAes^ be- 
fore my Mailer was up^ I carried the Cup to a Gold* 
imith a good way oft fiom our Houfe^ and defir'd 
him to trick it up as if it had been rfew^ whitb he 
promised to do^ and that in a fhott time. Return^ 
mg home^ I gave my Miftrefs an Account of my 
Commiifion^ or at leaft a^ much of it as I thought 

{>roper^ telling her^ I hard met widi a Cvqi to exad- 
y like hen, that they could not wteU Ibe known 
afunder, but that the Goldfmith would not ^ate a 
Farthing of 2 f Francs fov it. She Could not ^k 
that unrea(bnabie> becauie the old ofie had coft Tery 
near as much, and that I knew fall well, fori had 
weigh'd it. She ieem'd exceedingly iatisfy^d with 
what I had dpfie, and therefore out of tn Impa« 
tience to ha?e the Cut), ihe ran to her Chamber^ 
and immediately fetch d me the Money, giving ifte 
half a Ktal for my PalAs. I took it, but id I #9S 
otherwife en^l<^*d t^ my Mailer all th^t Cbiy, I 
could not go to the Goldimiths rill towards Night, 
when I found an Opportunity, and went; and ha- 
ving brought home the Cup, my Miitreis was per^ 
fedly charm'd with it, and 1 no leiS, ih that le 
had been the Occafion of my gettitag fo muc^ Mo- 
gey. I now h^d wherewithal to Game afrefli, bur, 
atas! k did not laft long {far hating t^ 4o ^ith 


lU Jht Ufsmd ABms Part I 

thofe dutt were ciumingef thaa my felfj they iboa 
i^p*d 0e of whto I had. I b^an indeed to flip 
Otfd% to make faiie Iifts> to Palm, and the like 
loft of Villantes praftis d by Sharpdfe ; but then I 
could put thofe Trick9 only on tlwi^oanfl; Pages^ 
who had not much Money to lole. As tor thofe 
thaft day'df higiier^ they were greater Rogues than 
iny lUf^ and took Care I fhouid get nothing of 
them. If I got off Scot-free^ 'twas all I muft ex«- 
paAj hot genprally I came off Lofer. 

I.oould not carry this Trade on long without be- 
iiig talmi Notke of. My Eellow^enraats oUerv'd 
I oilea pby^^ and (eldom or never woti> which 
made them* think I mufl hare ibme indireA Ways 
for recruiting my felf They talkrd of it fb fi[^ 
q«ently>. that at laft it came to my Mafter's £ars> 
who alio had begun to fufpeft me> not feeing me 
iO'dili&etit in> the Kitchin as I was wont to be. 
He rdolv'd to. watch me^ and havti an Eve upon 
myA&ions^ Thus Thieves am accuflomVi to be 
jeatousone of anotherj.and cannot fuffer one below 
them to pry ' into- their Rogueries. No NtoJier can 
be fo fevefc upon a Daughter's Praftioes as fhe that 
iias been guilty of idhe like Crimes^ nor Kfofler fo 
umnefcifui to his pilfering Servam as he diat is the 
gftsat^ft Hlforer himfelf. NiyMafbr was. one dmt 
uodi^ood this Bufmefs beit of any> and yer^ for- 
ibodu he tpok an AffeAion to me for the Hdehnr he 
smagm'd in me. But who ii it ttiat was nota Thi^ 
in.ttiis Houfe? The Steward^ GentlemftChUflier/ 
Vkh Jk* Cbsmht, Bttdfer^ Cook, Fages^ Coachman 
and' Footmen were, and who I wonder ih6dkl^ 
elcape ? Every one fpug^t to make his Neft as well 
as he could, and no Bodv took Notice of what tb6' 
other did, but all kept the Sea*et out Of acommen 
latereft reUgioi^y, and allconfented to cheat their 
Mafter whenever they had Opportunity; Tell-Taler. 
iwd Squoatefs wererfure: to be: kiok'd out of Coai^ 


pany^ and could not ftay loi^ ui that Houie. Thc^ 
would all combine againft them^ and one wi^ or 
other get them out, that they mi^t be aUe to tdl ^ 
no more Tales. Either they were hooted and drivMi'v 
out| or fp periecuted^ that they were not able to ftsf. 
All thefe petty feres of Theft were lo(^*d upon by 
them ^ imall Duties and Per<|uifites bekn^iiw to 
their I4aces^ for which they did net think diemlelni 
obUg'd to their Mafter^ but took them as dnt Dicf, 
and theoght them as mudi fo as their Wages*. What 
they prey d moft u^n,, was the ProvifiofiSL cine were 
brou^t UjXto the Kitchin^ of which the gmteft past 
was vSSL miffing^ without ai^ BocUos caring to giro 
an Account of it. Theie were general^ whole 
Loins of Veal^ good handfome Slices of BacoD> 
entire Hams, ChcrTongues. Boars-Heads, Yeniibi^ 
Pafly^ Salt-Uts^ and a thou^uid odier fudi*likeDaiii'- 
tiesy whjlch dilappear^d in a Moment after they came - 
once to be iee^u As for the Poulterer and Pi^iy^ 
Cook's Provender^ that was g^eraUy fecnc'd by xof 
Mafter> who never &il'd taiet by enough for hini'* 
felf a^d his Friends. Many other Thefts of- greater t 
Confeq9ence I faw every Day cqmmitted upon our 
poor Lord^ but 1 4uril not. ipeak for fear of beiiW' 
us'd fcurvily^ 9nd therefore consented my ielf wi£ 
obferving tbem^ without beiQg concerned in the ^ 
nefit of them. 

By thele Means^ ibch«*Ulie ^;^tXord$ aaown iboii 
reduce a potent and fiqorilhiQg^ liouie to ao li/sS^ 
t^l^ and ds this makes thein^mpftgage their Land% 
and ^Vi their Vaffals. Mife;able Heacb of a Family !/ 
whQoot caring to ^ve themielves dieTrouUe coiook 
into their Domei^ick Conceras^ fiiffer themielvea to 
be devoured alive by thefe Caterpillar, theie Haraie&, 
They muft needs be all fenfibj^, that the fewer thei^ 
are of thefe Blood-fuckers in a Houl<^ the better it ii» 
for the Houfe; yet there's never, ifc one oi them biup 
will have more of thefe Vermin than he has occafioa 


aft : TheUtedhJA^i^ ^aatt 

tlie hi|;heft to the loweft^^ for there's hardly ever i 
Dorter But thinks himfelf as good as a^Tradefinaii/ 
the Tradefimui will compare with the M^^ant^ tbd 
Mercfaint rivals the Gentleman • and, tKe Gendetnaif 
tkmks himielf equal with C6ufits^ MarqitflTes. Dukei 
lUid Princes^ and thefe laft^ ni^ny times^j hold up' 
th^ Heads ecpiid with Kirigs'; and 411 th& but to 
make the greater Koife^ and pretend to, a Degree 
that is not due to them. Nevertbele^^ if we con- 
fder a Ut^ thb fame exklted Conditfon of a King 
is not fo deiirable as we diaV imifgine; for t^t King 
is there^ whole Slee(> or .Dtverifions can be dompac^a 
with thofe of a I^orttr. The biffy Tradefman fenjdys 
more Quiet^ and the Adventurous Merchibit rtft^ 
not half the Rii^ue. A King fbids more Snares and 
Cares in a Crown^ than a Merchant does' in all his' 
Voyages. A King furdi taiy be alloiv'd tp haVd 
greater Trouble in giving out nis Orders it in Army; 

vi v^uai&vj may uw vugo^ u ui j^cuia^ 

uft be inevitably fi>, ifhis Subjeaf 
don't timely fupf>Iy him. In a Word^ there is ntf 
Brince^ whether a Subieft or not^ but has more 
Cares won him than ne that makes Court to him. 
He muft watch while others deep. For this Resdbti 
clie Effftiam^ when they had a ijiind to reprefent sl 
King, painted a Scepeer wit^ an £)re at the Top ot 
i(. He muft^ Uke a godd FilOt^ irork it the Helm 
while others reft themfelvdi. He %hs and mourns^ 
while others kiugh and are menjT. He's never l^ 
Ipv'd but out of a private Ihtereft^' whereiteite oueht 
CO be belov'd^ feared and hOQ6ur'd on a publick Ac- 
count. He rarely 6r never is told the Truth, for 
&ar it fliould diipleale him. He's yet more rarely 
iiadeoeiv*d^ and he knows well for wnat Reaibn. 


Book It d/ Gu2nkih d^^lf^ache; 2$^ 

But not to proceed any fiirthet on (b nice and deli- 
cate a Subjed as this5 which might occaiion me a 
greit many more ' Refleftions^ I will return to fpeafc 
of the Vanity of moft Men of Quality and Great 
Lords, who not cariftg to retrench the Nutaber of 
their Domefiicks, or abridge the Expenees of their 
Family, fall at laft to decay, and aiTe obliged to re- 
tire into the Country to fave Charges, Tnere they 
bufy themfelves at fome Country Village or Houfe 
of theirs, in rearing of Poultry, ratting thefr Cittle; 
or lowing their Grounds, for now, God knows, they 
would make but a pitiful Figure it Court, and there^ 
fore they do wifely to avoid it. They now begin tqf 
Icnow what it is to live^ but, alafs ! too lalte. If Rich . 
Meft had but more Condui9f, they would rieter be 
Poors 2<id if Poor knew better how to manage thefn- 
felves, they would foon be Rich. ^ Both need only 
obferve Times and Sesiforts, and be acquainted wit» 
the Extent of their Ca|)4cities. It does not always? 
become a Rich Man to fpare, no more than it doe^ 
a Poor Man to fpend. There's Rules for ill Things. 
Ojie need only obferve them. He that goes beyoni 
them, furely repents of it. Money^ 'tis true, is given df 
Man to make ufe of ,' but then he ought to knov^ how^ 
to do fo, and not to fool it away on all Odcafions; 
If a Lord thinks fit to live generouQy, bis Vaffal 
mu& not think to do fo too l Th^ doei m>t belong 
to him. He'l Coon come to the Ground if b^ does.' 
One has ^oooo FtaHe^ a Yearr, ^nd the other, it rmy 
be, but 20. The DHFerente fs greaft, arid the Am- 
bicwQ oug^t to be fuitably projfortion'd. Youf ai'qi 
but a Crow, and can only aroafc, and yet Vofi will 
pac your felf in Competition with the fineft biftging* 
Birds. Whit Folly, nay whit M^dnefs^ is this? 
When you have a: good Piece of Cheefe in your 
^cdky will you fet up a finging to pleafe a J^lmi$X9f 
l^elpw thic cooan^a$ youjf &ia Voice ? 


. We ought to flo^p with one Foot in the Air a$ the 
Crane doesj when our Wealth Js cqncern'd* If we 
have wherewithal to fppnd^ we care not to be robb'd 
<i*it. A Caterer, « Cook, and a, Clerk of the 
li^tchin^ are three Thieves that a great Man ougbtto 
ridhi^ Hqufe of as fbonas he can, if he has not a mind 
to be eat up by the{n. It is a F0II7 next to Madnefs 
to endure tnem. 

. It is oftentimes the Matter's Faub that the Servaitts 
^re Rogues. They give them but finall Wages, and 
pay them often indifierently. They take miferable 
Wretches into their Service, whofe Neceffity obliges 
them to accept vifhat they can get. When they are 
once received, they foon find a way to e^creafe their 
Stipends a( their Matter's Ekpence. So^ Goottemen^ 
if you are cheated, you may ev'n thank your febes 
iofXn You, play off a hundred fifinks a Night> and 
fometlmes, it may be, a. whole Years Income^ yet 
Hiike no Care to pay your Servants, nor afiocd them 
the le^ft Gratification. This, txuly, is a fee Wav 
to b0 fervid well. Juft Payments, and good Rewards 
from a Matter, always make good and faithful Ser^ 
vants. What ! fays one to me, is it not enough if 
\ give my Servant large Wages, and pay him well to 
boot. No, it is not enough j for if you ^ve him 
Vut what you owe him, what Obligation has he to 
you .? Youi fliould, by your Civilities, obKge bitn to 
5o for you even mofe than Jbe ought, and to fcrve 
you njpre thro'> Affe^on thdn Duty* You don't iee 
Servants are over-hafty to fef ve Wm that keeps his 
Purfe. too (clofe from .them. A certain . Gentlenxan 
tQljerably rich, but not over-brave>. had a Quarrel 
with a: Neighbour /of his, about a Hunting-Match. 
This Neighbour did not .-underft^nd :.Railery, -.but 
fought well. The: G^tlem^ jiot caring to ttaod the 
g^ryal himfelf, gob^ iufty youqg fellaw, .a Soldier, 
to go about with hihi:,..whoinbcproinis!4fo much a 
Month, and which he paid 'dul)''. The Neighbour 
3*»r V meeting 

tnci^g him, drew Upon Him, but hfe' eai-'d iiot to 
difpute the Matter hirilfelf; knd fo left it to his Backy 
who n^Wg'd his Swoii4'feyen,'tharhe dif^'dhis 
Adver far y. He had cAly' the Misfortune 1:6 lofe his 
Hat and SCabar d ih the • Scuffle, and th*t'' Was all 
the HfeM hfc receiv^ 5» -but he/hWpM Hi^'Mkfteir the 
Gentletriih,- who hisicl 'retreated 10 niihbff ' that h^ 
was by this time got Home, would make him con^ 
fider able, Amends. By no means he thought he was 
fufficiently recompenc'd by the Penfion he gaverfiim* 
This fneaking Proceeding furpris'd him, but he faid 
nothing, and coati*iud*to' wait en him as before* 
The Neighbour, extreanily, v,ex'd that he had been 
difarfii*c^,^and t^^^^^ HS fruJI^ri^^M^tft Wh?>f# My H 

had'the^C^fttel, hkd'^pefbi^ W fi^ fiJft.^pHtthig 
another iniiis {tead, fought ^11 OcGanoa»«i)imecc|k^ 

agaiity, -Ijttt. Hvwas; orily mtk-^,^^ go6d VGndgpU' \ Xho 
Gei3flf^a4>>^M4sfortui^t^ wouU^ Jiayp j^ th^f:^fhi^,Pe- 
ligh fiicceedra^i buthe^^iight triverjfe.aamiich^ircniind 
as he pleafed, dnd t^e a diVed Flight if he Ith'Diighc 
fit, for. his A^verfary b^ good Heels a^ he, and^ 
much better Heart: He laid him on lo unn^i.ercifuljy 
that he l^ft;hiin for dead, and all this in the Sight of 
his Back^ who mov'd not a Step to help hini. WitK- 
ouc his, PrbteAidn, h/t j^'ad not ventur'd abroad, and 
thereforfi Hd, was much ;furpris'd to fee him ftaxid fo 
inlehfimy; ' When he came home, and had had his 
Woimds'aftcf jSriiifes drefsM; he cairdforhi$Champi.oii^ 
whoiffhe reproach'd ^Vijch his Cowardice and Ill*wi|l^ 
tellijm;*hipi>' ;hf thoti'gjhV one that had ekt his Bread^ 
and orahk hisT)riiik,'.mighf have been more honour- 
able 150 hiiti; The Soldier j having heard him oui;, 
replifid^ $iif,;'ypu hir'd me to wait upon ^ou, and 
I have do^e it. I wak obligd to no more. ^ If I ha^ 
drawtt ttiV Stt^ord' in your Defence, as I did the other 
I>ay, and. had lofl anbther I^at and Scab'ard, it, might 
have coftme more thjan a Month's Wages, You kqow 1 
canhor a'iford that, aitid as !f am paid, fo I (hall always 
ferve. V 2 If 

2^2 . The tifi and Mi^i Btttt 

If Yqu h^ve a mind. Gentlemen and great Lords, 
to be well ferv'd, and hare your Domefticsks Ipve 
you, ibew likewile fome Ktncuiefs to them. A fmall 
Mattel: will fuffice. Let but your Adajar-Domo diftri- 
bute lo Tifioles among them, and they will be better 
fatisfied.than your Jilt of a Miftrels was with the fine 
Coach you prefented her lately, and which fte did 
but laugh at you for. 

' ; CH AP. VL 


Cuzmaa gSes on^ and tells whd fafsd fiirther U^ 
twee ft him Ma hk Mafter^ tilt be was dij$»ifs*d 
. hk &niee* He tdkfs an Occapan to cm&mn 
• Idlenefs and ill Company. He recoH$^s the Spoils 
: and Trophies of Cooh$^ and relies a pleafant PaJ^ 
fage between him and hk Mifirefs. 

r" VE^as then the general Difbrder of thisHoufc, 
and the bad Example of the Servants, that made 
Ihe a Thief, and Gaming gave the firft Occafion^ 
J was. every Day with Wolves, and how could I e- 
fcape learning to howl. I had natural Inclination 
ehoifgh to Roguery I muft needs confefs, 1)ut then 
"'twas Pradice I wanted, and that I had enough of 
tifere. Idleneft contril^uted much towards it. He 
that can' employ himfelf well, need never fear being 
'drawn Info this Snare, whereas the flothful Peribn is 
"ever in danger of it. I did not look into niy own 
Breaflf,*t)ut confulted the Actions of other l^eople. 
ithouglk I might be allow'd to do as they did, with- 
t)Ut confidering it became them better, and that they 
Verv'd ttiejir Lords with^np'otl^r End.* But at length 
•^. found LWas miffaken, arid' had taken th?i Matter 

Vrong, for that fuch PermiHSons were gficitcd only 

• tu 


Boakn. of Guzman d^Alfarachc. 2^3 

to Favouqtes^ and fuch as had Credit with their 
Lords, to neceffary Perfbns, and fleek well-look'^ 
Fellows, to Flatterers and Pimps, true Crocodiles 
and Scorpions ; and, laftly, to thofe fly infinuating 
Rafcads, who know how to tickle the Ear, and poi- 
fon the Soul. Thefe People had a kind of Right to 
enrich themfelves at their Lord's Expence j but for 
fcch poor Dogs as I, fiich a contemptible Scullionr 
Boy, I was not admitted to fa great Villany, biit 
having been .trap'd in my Rogueries once or twice, 
for as I told you I was continually watch'd, I had due 
Correftion given me with a good Cudgel. 

About this Time my Mafter was fent for to drefs 
^ great Dinner for a Foreign Prince that was newly 
arrived at Court. He carried me ialong with him, 
and we were no (boner come into the Kitchin but we . 
employ'd our felves in rending, tearing, breakings 
dividing, and fetting afide what we thought for our 
Purpole, and our Due, and this before any Body elfe 
came, for there were other Cooks to be employ'd 
under my Mafter, who might, perhaps, have preten- 
ded to fome of the Fronts, had they been prefent, 
but we thought gpbd to prevent them by thefe 
Means. My Mafter iiad the Direftion of all, and he 
believ'd nothing more realonable, than that Cafap 
ftould have what was C^/^rs, and the Cook what 
was the Cook's. As fop the Underlings, they might 
fliift as well as they could, he did not think himfelf 
oblig'd to take Care of them. When Night came, 
he lent me home for a large Sack, for the Dinner; 
was not to be till next Day ; and having brought it,- 
we crowded into it all that we judg'd proper, and fo, 
he fent me' away privately with it, but the Burdeii 
was fo great, I did not (weat a little under it» I re-it, 
tum'd, and he had prepared to fill my Sack^gain, 
but I could not carry it away till I had Opportunity, 
for now all the other Cooks were come, and vw had** 
but too many Eyes upon us to fiifFer us to* do it pri- 

V 3 vatety. 

VatelVj which was neverthelefs ncceffary to be done. 
We therefore referr d it to a convenient Seafon^ and 
in the mean time he eraploy'd me in. pulling of 
Fowls, kiitiipg; them^ larding them, fmgeing them, 
and the Tike Exercifes of f he Jwtchin. Having many 
Hands, w:e ;rpon difpatch'd that, and all the reft of 
the preparatory Work, arid fo my Mafter thought he 
might now take an Occafion to fend me away* He 
^ifinlfs'd me^ telling me he was very forry he could 
not gb along with me, and this, you muft know, be- 
cauie of his Wife, whom jl have already told you he 
was jealbus of. He appeared very uneafy, but bear it 
he muft, atid fb he was fnin. He bid me be fure to 
pake Care of the Houfcj and fee that nothing was 
purloined, for being fo great a Thief himielf, he ap- 
prehendecl every Body elfe* He bid me likewijle tell 
'Tils Wife he knew not when he fhould come home, 
but therein he lied, for he knew well enough he 
could liot come till next Day after Dinner j but this 
Jie did to blind her, that Ihe might not know the cer-- 
tainty Of his coming, and, conlequently,' not dare to 
call ma Neighbour to make good^ her Husbands In» 
fufficiencies, as Cooks^ as well as others, have fbw^ 
times beep lerv'd. I prpmis d to obey all his Com- 
mands, whqn following me to the Door, as if he 
had fomething more to fay to me, he took out of 
a Coach the Sack he h^d hid there for that purpofe, 
and putting it on my Head, fent me away. I no 
fooner got home, but after having made my Matter's 
Compliments to my Millrefs, which, however, were 
but like ftale fifjfi to her, I began to Ihoot out what 
I had in my Sack, when appeared Capons, Partridges, 
Pheafaijits, Pullets, Pigeons, Pieces of Venifon, Ouar- 
tkri oiF Lamb, Tongues, Hams, and, in a Wora, as 
great Variety,, almoft, as was found in Noah's Ark. 
This, with tbie ojher S^cklbrought before, which had 
no left y^rijpty, w?s, methought, the mou charming 

5ight rejTMiaw in myXife, and the heft diyerfified. 

^4f?i.. •! vUv {,rM-^' '^', w '' ' Here 


ikIL cf Guzman d^AifaracheJ i^^ 

Here were Colours of all Softs, ^iid Creatures and 
Things of all Forms and Siz^s. When I had thus cxc- 
cutedmy Commiffion, I went to Bed, and 'twas dme 

you'd fay I fliould, fince I had wrought hard all that 
Day, ana Iwingingly tir'd my ftlf. MyMiftrels was for 
going to Bed too, for tho' me had not worked fo hard 
as L flie had drank harden and therefore 'twas but 
reafonable flie fliould have lome Repofe. My Lod|;- 
ing was in a Garret over the Gallery, againu which 
the Sun darting fiercely^ it became almoft as hot by 
Might as by Day, fo that making u(e of a Priviledge 
we have in Sfain^ of lying Naked when we pleale, 
I puird off my Shirt and fell a-fleep heartily. About 
an Hour or two after, I was all of a fudden wakVi 
by a Conibrt of Cats, who made as terrible a Din in 
the Gallery below, as if there had been a thoufand 
Devils there. Thefe Cats you know are a fort of 
Animals that have no Regard to their Mailer's Good, 
and who growl continually^ efoecially while they 
are eating, therefore a Man can t tell when they are 
fatisfied. I faid thetefore to my felf, it would be 
the Devil if thefe Gentlemen, who are naturally fo 
malicious, fliould fall upon our Provender; they 
would certainly make mad Work there, and I fliould 
not care that my Bones fliould pay for their Impu- 
dence J it were beft then for me to fee a clear, rid- 
dance of thepi. What we have got, is uqquefl:iona- 
bly our own, becaule we have brought it home. My 
Matter prog'd for't, and I bore the Burden of it, 
which is certainly Title enough. There's no further 
Doubt to be made of it. Wirnout any more Argu- 
ments, I ought to go and fee whats the Matter. 
Hereupon jumping out of Bed, and not flaying to 
put on my Shirt that t might not lofe Time, being 
apprehenfive of meeting no Body at that time of 
Night, I ftole foftly down the Ladder, thinking to 
furprife thofe Rioters. When I was got tothe bottom, 
I was ftartled to find a broad ftrcak of Liglit before 
'- •' V 4 me. 

%$^ . The Life anj A0hp t 

me^ not having heard the lead Noife^ when h 
abouc^ I Giw a Figure all naked like my felf 
Lamp in its Hand^ and fo blacky chat I toqk 
be the Devil. It was, in truth, my Miflxcfi, ^ 
having been wak'd by the Cats, as I had been^« 
coming to (ecure the Belly-Timber ; and be^g ^ 
heated than I was with the Wine (he dr^ik 
iiight, had thrown off her Smock^ and not 
Care to hide her Nakednefs thro' the lame Co 
ration as I had, believing me to be fbundly a*j 
She perceiv'd me as (bon as 1^ did her j and wl 
I took her fpr a Devil, ibe took me for a Sp 
U^e both began to (guawl at the lame tim|^ 
ran into her Chamber, and I (owar4s the 
. lery, being like to break my Neck by the way.\ 
hearing me fall^ guefs'd it was I, and that I had'/ 
ior the fame Reaton ihe did, and fhe was much 
kight of. it, the curfed Cats diiappear'd s 
Noife we made ^ and I being Curious to know 
Jiad hecn the pccafion of our Difafter, Went 
t found a larded. Hare with nothing but, the 
Jeff, fb greedy . th^fe Animals had been, w] 
never more oyt of Humour than when they i 
Jng* I put Things in the beft Order I could, 
. return'd to Bed, But to fleep it was impoffible^' 
.over and above that' my Bruifes gave me a greajti 
o( Pain^ my naked Miftrefs ran fo much iaj 
Mind. I could not clofe my Eyes. The Sight & « 
iiakea Woman's t|ie tl>eyiL But this was not ^i^lor 
having Orders from' my Maftcr to return to hi^PJ as 
foon as it was Light, f^ive ^ Clock had no fppher Ibitek, 
hnt I was fain to get up and drefs me for that purpolb. 
Befpre I went, I thought proper to take a Turn m the 
Oallery, to fee if there were po more Mifchief ddiiej 
hut what a Stink did I meet with there I what dkl I 
fee! I dare not defcribe* ic Fear had it feems a tfflr^ 
nblp ]EfFeci on my poor Miftrefs, for all the wsy 1 
Went th^te was a ftiiiiOngTraio of Gun-t^owder laid, 


*v • 

BookE 0/ Gujtiiian 4^Al6rkhcr 2^7 

even to faer Chamber Dooc. I would not take the 
JPains to clean it/ and as (he had dropc it^ I thought 
it was iitteft for her to remoye it. I left Matters as 
I found them^ at^d fo hailed away to my Mailer. 
He enquired, immeidiately .how his Wife and Family 
idid^ and I gave him a fatisfa^ry Account^ but 
did not fay a Word of the Adventare of the Cats, or 
that of his Wife. That was too nice a Point to touch 
upon. He fet me to Work, and I laboured liard with 
the reft, who had been up all Night. JEvery Body 
was in Adion, and as this, like all other Noblemen's^ 
was a very diilbrder'd Houfe, every thing went to 
wreck, and there was great Spoil made of all Things. 
We need only fpeak to have any Thing, and fcarce a 
Third of what we got was made u(e of. What ne- 
mam d, was fecur'd another way. We demanded Su- 
gar for Tarts, and Tarts for Sugar, and every thing 
twice ^r thrice over, Varying only in the manner of 
asking. We call'd thefe Jubilee Feafts, becaufe then 
the Rivers over-flow'd, and Fifli fwam in the large 
Water. For my part, I waited to give a Stroke, 
which I believ'd I might do, after the gresjt Dog's 
had their Bellies full, for I would not have it thought 
but my Talons were as iharp as theirs. Neverthelefe, 
for Paftime, I, like a pool as I was, div'd my Hand 
into a Pannier of Eggs, which I lov'd very well, and 
put half a Dozen of them into my Pocket. My Matter 
faw me j and as there was then fevcral of the Houfe- 
Servants in the Kitchin, he, to gain Reputation at 
my E}^pence, ran to me, and, like a Brute as he was, 
jgave me fuch a Kick, that he threw me on the Floor 
on that fide where I had the Eggs. Judge you what 
an Omelet this mud needs make. The Eggs ran down 
my Thighs and Legs in fuch manner, as fet all the 
Company a laughing. You may imagine what a 
Conrufion and Rage I was in ajgainft my Maften 
He added Reproaches to his Injuries, and told me, 
lie would cea^h m? to il^al in fuch a sjeat Lords 


spS The Life and AMiota ParcL 

Vbofvle as dist wa& No Body mdeed could teach me 
^cter, and I was about to tell him^- 1 thought thofe 
Eggs belpng'd to the Fowls he had or der'd me to 
carry home to hfe Hode ; but I confider d of the 
Matter^ and belieT'd it .better to hold my Peace^ 
fince I had drawn that Storm upon my (elf by my 
IndiCbretion. I nevertheleis> to make my felf Amends^ 
thnift into my Breeches unobferv'd, a bi^ce of Par- 
. tridges^ four Quails^ half a roafled Pheafant^ and 
£oox Veal Sweet-breads^ not being willing to 
. nave it iaid^ I had been at Court and not (een the 

Afl thisConfufion of a Fcaft being over, my Matter 
and i retum'd home^ he pretending itill to be angry 
with me, and I being really fo with him. We both 
however held our Peace, till at length he being a- 
fraid, kaft I (hould go in a I|umour and difcover all, 
iaid to me, FooUfli Boy that thou we/t, where was 
thy Wit when thou went'ft about to difgrace me and 
thy felf for half a dozen Eggs, which them took'ft 
before fe many People? Is it that thou wantedft 
j^gs in our Houfe, or that, in a fCitchin fo well pro- 
vicM as that Lord's was, there was nothing better to 
take? Haft thou liv'd with me thus long to be fb great 
miOaii I would have excused my felf, but he would 
pot hear me ; when going on with his Difcourfe, he 
feid, I acknowledge I was in the wrong to kick thee, 
))ut as Matters ftooS I could not well avoid it ; however, 
to make diee Amends, I will buy thee a pair of Shoes 
$0 morrow, and make thee a Prefent of them. I 
^as glad to hear that, for I had more than ordinary 
pccalK>n for Shoes at that time, but I never faw 
ithem,. and I fuppofe my Miftreft hindred my having 
Chem^ either becaule (he was angry that I had feen 
her naked, tho* Women are not commonly offended 
tit fuch Matters, or elfe that (he fear'd I might reveal 
pur Adventure, which might turn to her Prejudice* j 
ifor. we were iio»<fix>fter come homey but my Matter 


BookIL ^ Gdzooan d^Alfarachel ^59 

having had half an Hours Diicdtirie wfdi lier in pri- 
vate^ from the beft humoured Mah chat could be be- 
fore^ he an of a fudden became the inoft incens^ 
agatnft me^ which T could tilainfy^ perbeire by hk 
Countenance. He nevertheteis faid riodiing tomt 
that Nighty but went to Bed betimes^ whidi he had 
more than ordinary occafion for^ having not flept th6 
Ni^ht before* For my part^ I fought all Oppor^ 
tumties to fpeak to my Miflrefi^ to know what had 
occafion d my Mafter's Diiplealure ; but (he avoided 
me^ and I. could never bring my Ends about. Ai 
I underilood from a Neighbour, to whom flie hsld 
open'd her Breaft, her lU-will to me was not on ao^ 
count of my feeing her Naked^ but becaufe I had 
leen what fell from her in that Fright, and (he there* 
fore was afham'd to look me in the Face. Let it bd 
what it* would I went to Bed too, not over-(bIicitoi2i 
what had been the occafion* either of her Diipleafhre 
or his. Befimes next Morning, being defirous to 
raife a little Money, I went into the Kit<^hin to pre- 
pare Matters for that t>urpo(e ; and as there was (omd 
Pafte left that remain d of the Pafties and Tarts tW 
had been made the Day before, I fet to work, and' 
made an excellent Pafty of it with fuch cold Meat 
and Scraps as I had hid. About Night, when I had 
nothing almoft to do, I went to the Market to kU] 
that and the Partridges and Quails I had (ecur'd the 
Day be&re; As I thought my Maftef Would be en-^ 
quiring after me, becaule I knew he would (eek ail' 
occaiions to quarrel with me, I made what haOt t 
could to get a Chapman, and, as good Luck would 
have it, I ibon found one. It was a hoary old Fellow' 
with SpcAacles. The Agreement was fbon made,' 
and if he had a mind to buy, I had no le(s to ^f. * 
We agreed then for 4 Francs^ which, tho* not above * 
half what my Merchandize was worthy 1 fhould have 
been happy if I could have got my Money lb fpeedi- • 
ly ^s was neceflary, for I had to do widi the greateft 


300 ! The Life anJ A&iom ' Sartl- 

Dotai:d> iht greateft Tiiflerj the greateft Pun6b[lio- 
Man^ the greateft Impemnent^ and the moft Ridi^ 
jealous Creature in the Wdrld^ ^ and it mads me when- 
fivcr I think of him ; for I ha^ « no fi>oner delivered 
my Goods, hut he muft put his Repmarj or Pocket- 
j^ook under his. Arm, hang his greafy Gloves and 
^ptty Handkerchief at his Girdle, pull out hisSpeda* 
cles^ which he muft clean to look on the Money, 
ppen and fliut his Purfe twenty rimes to make it go 
eafy, handle his Chaplet and his Buttons that he 
pretended incommoded him, and the like intolera- 
pie Delays, which were enough to make fuch a 
young Fellow as I fweat, who were appreheiifive of 
piy Mafter's furprifrng me every Moment. At length, 
^s I fear'd, he came before this old fumbling Cur 
would difpatch me : Ha, Spark, cnr's he ! What are 
you receiving this Money for ? what fine Bargain 
are you driving here ? I turn'd as pale as Death. I 
had not the Courage to anfwer him. And if I had 
had any, what could I have faid when this old 
Dreamer was ftill by. There was no Evafion could 
ferve my Turn, for the Partridges, Quails and Pafty, 
%)ke (ufficiently to my Prejudice. I therefore faid 
not a Word, but let him>take my Money, and thought 
I fliould be happy if I could elcape fo. He however 
told me, I muft not pretend to fet aFoot more within 
his Doors, and that, if I dar'd but to pafs by his 
Lodging for the future, he would give me luch a 
Welcome,, as fliould make me wifli myfelf further off ^ 
and fo giving me a good Kick in the A — ^ he cried. Go 
and take notice that is the laft Favour you (haU re- 
ceive from me ; which faid, he left me. All this was 
done in the Pirefence of that curfed old Dog, whom 
God confound,^: from whom, when he leift minded 
me, I fnatc^'d the Partridges, Quails and Pafty, tel- 
ling him, a^ I ran away, he might go for his Money 
to nim that had^^t it, for as fohmy Goods I would 
have them again. Seeing it to no Purpofe to follow 
^1./.jU ' me^ 

BooklL 0/ Cu2man d^Al&r^die: acr 

me^ he began to walk as fait as he could :0m nma 
he could not) after the Cook^who di4 not go fo fait^. 
but he overtook him as I perceiy'd; but how the; 
Matter ended , or whether he got any Satisfadion; 
from him or not^I cai^iot telll was not fo mad as to^, 
fiay to fee^ for fear my ^.^um Jam Mailer might oome' 
and demand his Goods again^ and then I Had been' 
in asfine Cafe; for having no Money^ and being juil:: 
turn'd out of Doors^ I had more than ordinary occa*; 
Hon for them to procure me a Lodgings whidi I didt 
not doubt they would do> and iooiethipg to bOOit; 
for I had been in iiich haft^^ that I had ibid them 
too great a Penniworth to this old RafcaL . 

• » • 

' < . • . : f 

C H A P. VIL > 

Guzman taJ^i np the Ba$ht ^^n^ in^d ni^/ ma^ 
fiy ' ^ftfd niord "SttMtims on Manli^nd. M 
laft^ bj fMans of a ihft^ be gdt^ a great deal of 
li/hney^ 0id Up ^aAxii. \ , 


* « ' 

IN whatsoever Coi^dition a Man isj^ it is ftUl better 
to be Wife than Ricji; for tho' Fortmie* fliould 
turn! Tail JCnowledge can never forfake. him. Wealth 
may decreaie every Day, but Underdanding.will ra- 
ther be augmentea than leiTen d. That Litcle a wife 
Man knows^is wor^h morcf than all a rich Man enjoys. 
There's no body but is fenfible what Advantage Wifn 
dom has of Fortune , altho' they bc^ tejcid to the 
fame End, that is, to make Meii Illuftrious and Ho- 
nouralple. The PHilolophers have given us different 
j^ortrdits of Fortune^ becauTe flie 'is ever variable irf 
her felf,, according as flie is looked upon. Every ontf 
paints her as he findf her in refpect to himfeif, or ha$ 
iionfiderM fier in Viigard to other People, If (hp he 
1 . .. • good^ 

^^ :thelJf€MndA»hHs Hnt 

BaSffkt « the Miftrefs of all Vktucsj if tad, the 
other of litt Vice. He that fke favours tnoft, is 
gnerally 6ht that takes the leaft Care to prcferve 
r; She is as frail as Glais, and both inconftant and 
reftlefs^ like- a S^herica) Body ona plain Superficies. 
Wteat fh^giveis to Day, (he takes away to Morrow. 
Siie is ft Flux^ and Reflift, which at latt. Shipwrecks 
us on: tile ^koffecof Deach^^ ^M4)ence we have no pofC- 
bility to retunfi 'As long as we lire fiie mikes Co- 
ritedians irfiis^.who have every Day a new Part to 
iliidjr^ ahd;taiift appear Jn^ a dilferent Form. The 
leaft 'fiveit difhiouilts, and'^fctt her vanifh. ' i>hi- 
loibphy alone* can deal with her, and bring that 
to rights which (he has put into difbrder. This fame 
P hilofophy i s a ^my Hneb^ Mine | haj^y is he diat 
can make a Difcovery of it. He may get thence a 
great deal of Tre^i^are^^wi^ou foar of exhaufting 
fe She Encourages one In gooa Fortune, and Com- 
iorti OfifekiwlMji • Sbe.i$ Stiver co. a. poo^Man/iiord 
to a rich^ 3^ fo.a great : Lc^^d^a precious .and . iaefti- 
mablejQWel .la the^ moit-aiHiiSdng,^ 
moft furprifing Events, Ihe always luppoftsand^ffoes 
along with us; whereas a Man whrhout her iis^t to 
trip and ftumble in the plaineft Road, '^he^re^ no 
AmiAion upon Earth, Tenipeft on the Sea, or Storm 
m the AJf i but what Philofophy Can (uiimount.' A 
Man ought liot io wifli to live, but to grow wflej'tior 
grow wife, but to live well. What a "Wiilolbpher en- 
pys, is peManeht, certain, and of continbance. But 
whither'4«fay, Gtizman, cry you, what makes you fo 
full of PhiloKraky ? What do you mean,bY beftowing 
fo many Itoe-Praifcs on what we kno^r oetteif than 
you? Where -will this learned pifcourfe end ? tt will 
dnd, Fri^kl, reply I, in bringing me back to* my 
Rags that I had quitted for ttfe Cjfflce df a StpIHon- 
Boy, and which I am now about to reftme With 

Ciohtent, whicii is all that die grcatcft Phflofopher 

can do. * .:.*.. ^ ^. * _. ..'•... 4 

* I was 

« ^ 

Book II «/ Gaznum ^Alfirachc. ^ty^ 

I was well enough born^ of noble and honeft Pa« 
rents as you know, and I could noc eafily prget tha^^ 
therefore was refolv'd not to degenerate. It was ne« 
cefTary I ihould fhew I re&mbled then> in erery 
things and that I could^ like them, TtCift the Difafters 
of Fortune, and endure 'with Patience all the Af- 
fronts and Injuries flie was plea&'d to impofe won 
me. Herein.! difcover'd Marks of a ^greatddul *I1ie, 
Bad become worle in Profperity^ aid the Good bet-, 
tec in Adverfity* When they can benefit tKem(eIve$ 
by iti it is fo them like a Crucible where Gojd is re-' 
fin d.- .Who tould have ctci* thought, thatj^ after ha- 
ving fo well ionr'd this Cook afs I didf, I ihould, hayti[ 
been fo ill rdwarded on fb crifling an Account. Yotf It 
tell me^ perhaps, fo the World goes ; that thi$ Iitep-' 
ptens^^tery Day to die honefteft People^ who rftcr ha- 
ving' fcrv-d great Lords and Princes with the^ utmoft' 
Fidelity, are driven out of Dboils^ and all riieir Ser- 
vices forgot accordiia^ to the Caprice or Ifomour of 
their Mafbr. iilne was alittle^exafperated againff 
itie, it may be, for ftealing the Eggs lo fooliflily. He 
had heard of fome other Roguenes perhaps^ and thac 
I pby'd higher than I could well afford, but allthar 
was nothing. Twas his Wife*^ Nakednefi that ftuck 
in his Stomach; he could not digeft that, but look'cf 
upon itas niv^Fault,^ and thought- himlel^ h^f dif&o* 
nour'd by my feeing her in 3iit Xondition. This 
made hidi to* wait only for a proper Occafion to get 
rid of me J his- Wife having told him, that,, after fa 
fhameful ah Adventure, fhevcduld not havethe Im-* 
pudencG to.look' nfe in thcf^F^iGiSw* fiut aR this fhe 
did to fhew her Modefly at my Expence, and make 
her Husband have abetter 0{)ifiipn of her than per- 
haps fhe deferv*d. ' 

But I am turo'd out into theStreet, and fcick'd in- 
to the Bargain. What fhall Id*. -'-whither fhalF I go, 
or what will f become of me?- 1 left my Msdler with 
the fine Reput^ionofa kogue^ ^bi wha will take 

' • me 

304 ^ ty Ufe and Mions OJ^artt; 

me iJDi with that Charafter. My only Hope was in 

my Baskec^which to me was as great a Talent as £lo^ 

quence to Demofibmes^ or Stratagems to Ulyjfes. I was 

not forry I had try*d that fort of Life^ and Eicperi- 

ence is a great C^nfort to oine." Wh&t a Man iiiffers 

with his good Will, aflSfts him Wonderfully when he 

comes to be obliged to undergo the fame Trouble^ 

There's no living in this World without Troubles. 

The Life of Man is interlarded with them. Nothing 

iis more advantagio^s than to leam bedmes how to 

digeft them. There are tiOne lb Thornr, but they 

may. be handled without Pricking. A Man niuft ne- 

verthelefs be skilful to know where to fit upon them. 

I liv'd fo well with tMts fairte Cook y thai when I 

came to taj[i:j3 a Revene of Fortune^ I (hould have 

been iiark Mad if I h^d not before experienc*d it. I 

iKoidd have been like at Frefli-water Seaman in a 

Storm. But well f^re the Market-^Basket I fay, that 

w^s my Eefuge. I came to that Employment again 

miich xn the lame Condition I had left it^ that is^ not 

worth a Crofs^ for you may imagine I had not laid 

out what 1 had got in Lands or Tenements. I was 

better cloath'd indeed^ but that w^ tiot extraordi^ 

nary neither. All went as it came^ that xs^ Lighttyy 

accordine to. the Proverb. Whatever I became Ma- 

fter of, . Gaming foon rid my Hands of ; but this Ad- 

vantage, however, I had by lofmg my Money, that 

t at the fame time loft likewife the little Moidefly I 

had left. That Virtue does by no n^ans fuit with 

poor Folks J the lefs they have of it, the lefefenfible 

they are of^ their Misfortunes, ani^ that's fo nmch the 

better for them. 

I. was well known to moft that ftequented the 
Markets, and had Money fufficient to buy a Basket^ 
and that, was enough* Nevertheldisi . to take away 
all Reproach, and pi?event Peo|3lcs atfributfog my 
^ettirnme; to my ol4 Employment to ahj^ ill Defign^ 
i refoly'dji before I ?ngag'd » il,.to go tspd offer my 

**ii^ ^^rvic« 

Book IL of Guzman d* Alfarache. 50 5 

Service to (bme Cooks of my Matter's Acquaintance, 
who knew well what I were capable of, intending, 
if they received me^ to render my felf thoroughly 
knowing in Kitchin- Affairs, for I had already madp 
a tolerable Beginning. I was every where well re-^ 
ceiv*d, tho' every Body knew my Hiftory, but then 
it was only for 24 Hours, for all their pretended 
Kindnefs for me was meerly to get out of me what 
had pafrd in our Family, and how many Rogueries 
I had feen my Matter commit. This is what dif- 
contented Servants are Commonly valued for for ;i 
while ; but they feeing me unwilling to tell any thing 
but what was to my Matter's* Advantage, (bon grew 
weary of me, and in few Days caftiier'd me. A 
thorough-pac'd Rogue now would have been abfc 
to have liv'd with them two or three Months upon 
fuch Stories as I was srble to tell, but, for my part, { 
could hardly hold out 3 Days, 

Having thus done my Duty as I imagined, I thought 
of nothing further, but taking up the Basket a^ain. 
I had ever been defirous of doing fomething, and 
hated Idleneis from my Heart. I was fatisBed, a Man 
was (b much the nlore a Man, as he knew how tp 
employ himfelf lawfully. If I had known better, 
I had done better. I can't imagine how, defiring tp 
be good as we all do, we (houTd find fo much Diffi- 
culty in coming to it ; amd tho' we every Day pro- 
pofe to our felves to labour at it, we don't accotn- 
plifli it in many Years, nay fometimes during our 
whole Lives. 1 fancy we don't wifli our felves over- 
well, or elfe lull our felves to fleep, becaufe the 
Thought of Futurity has not that EfFed upon us as 
might reafonably be expecSted from good Chriftiahs, 
who have a mind not to be furpris*d by Death. 

I refum'd my former. Calling, beginning to carry 
Sardens, and do Service to the Publick ais I did be- 
fore, by which I got a tolerable Livelihood, I did 
jiot, 'tis true, fare io well as I had donp with the 

X Copk, 

30^ The Life and ASHons Part 1 

Cook, but no matter for that, I was contented- As 
I did not depend on any Body, I had no* Body to 
give an Account to of my Adions. I eat and drank 
when I pleas'd, and that was Pleafurc enough. I 
knew how to be Sober, and was hardly ever Drunk ; 
fo much fome of my Friends Exceffes appeared beaft^ 
ly and ridiculous to me. The very Sight of them in 
that Condition would have made me Temperate, had I 
been naturally incljn'd to be otherwife. If Drunken- 
nefs be unfeemly, and of bad Example to Servants 
and ordinary Perfons, what muft it be to thofe of 
Worth and fome Station in the World ! What a fine 
thing 'tis to fee People drink other Folks Healths till 
they burft themfelves. If you have a mind to have 
this fine Sight, you need only go int6 fome Tavern 
Kitchin, where you Ihall find f or 6 of thefe Fellows 
making the Debauch, as they call it, and who^ tho' 
they aflume the Charader of Honeft Fellows, fhall 
utter a Million of Impertinencies and Slanders, and 
fbmetimes downright BlaQ)hemies and Execrations, 
iiich as the very Madmen in Bedlam would hardly be 
guilty of. Then you ihall fee them do fuch Extra- 
yancies^ as the leaft Scrupulous among them would 
be aiham'd of, and condemn, were ne but fober. 
[Now they come out of the Tavern, wh^re they have 
been all Night, but what Figures do they make ? What 
Phyz*s have tbey ? What fiery or fodden Counte- 
nances, and how they reel or ftagger ? They tack 
about inceiTantly as Ships fometimes do, and nm all 
the Points of the Cemfafs before they reach 4 Street's 
length. The Boys hopt at and run aftertheui, as 
they do after Befs-a-Bedlams, Now how can an ho- 
neu Man fhew his Face after fuch Vagaries .as thefe ? 
And how dares he drink after he has w much expos'd 
himfelf ? Let Rogues and Bullies follow this,Trade ; 
nothing can be too mean for them ; it fuits well with 
?their Condition, they are the -very Sinks .-and Com- 
:mon-Shore$ of Mankind j. but for Men <wf Honour, 


Book 11. of Guzman d^AIfarache, 307 

Reputation and Quality to do fo^ I am afliam'd of 
it. They (hould, methinks^ be more careful of their 
iCharacfters^ and not thus debafe themfeh^es to the 
very Mob. Should an Ecclefiaftick or Religious Peiv 
fan thus ftray from his Charac^er^ as there are but 
too many that do^ I have nothing to fay, let them 
be their own Judges, I don't doubt but they repent 
of it, and enjoin themfelves Penances when they 
come to be fober. This is (uch a Vice, that it is a 
Shame even to fpeak of it, Baf^ to difguife it. Infa- 
my to pra(5Hfe it,and very Unworthy of a Man not tQ 
have it in the greateft Abhorenpe, 

- We Basket-Bearers had a Houfe in the Market, or 
rather a Hovel, which we bought and repair'd at our 
own Charges. We held there our greateft Affem • 
blies, and had Rejoicing-Bouts as often as there wa^ 
joccafion. I always got up with the Sun, and wenf 
to thofe Places where I thought there would be Em- 
ployment for me. I was ever ready at Hand, an4 
tender d mjr Service with a good Grace. I was faithr 
ful and vigilant, and did not fleep as I wept alpng, 
as fome are apt to do. By this means I came to ^av^ 
Reputation in my Bufinefi, and had always, mor$ 
npon my Hands than I were able to do. This made m^ 
take a Journey-Man, who a{jEfted me, and for whof^ 
Fidelity I aniWer d. I knew him, and having don^ 
him former Kindneflfes, he look'd upon yn? as hi? 
Mafter, and waited upon me at Table. 

About this time there were Commiffions given pu> 
for new Levies. When any thing of that Nature 
happens, the Town immediately rings with it, an4 
a Council of State is held in almpft every Hpufe, 
'Twas but jiift, y6u*l fay,- ours Ihould have one tpo^ 
ancf fo we nad. , We Beggars have as good a Title t0 
Speculations, I^bjcds, and to difcourfe of ^fFaifS c^ 
State, as the beft.^ and it ought not to be thppght, be- 
caufe ourEmploymcnt is fo lojy^bur Sentiments .fljpul4 

l^ Jpli mfkyvf our Penetratitwii more diftant ffom th4 

3o8 The Life and Anions Part L 

Truth, I'll tell you by the way, I knew a certain 
Perfon who had as good Sence as any Body, and 
yet had no better Correfpondent for the moft fecret 
Affairs of State, than a certain Beggar with two 
Wooden Legs, who never ftir'd off the Bridge where 
he begg'd, but which was extreamly frequented- 
Good Seme is to be found in every Condition^ and 
Prejudice only confines it to the Great. It muft be 
thought, forfooth, becaufe they are Great in Title^ 
they are io in every Thing elfe j but this does npt al- 
ways prove true. They have great Palaces, great 
Equipages, great Employments, but it does not fol- 
low from thence that they |;^ave great Senfe. Na- 
ture oftentimes makes iis Amends, in refped: to the 
Mind, for what Fortune has denied us in relpeA 
to the Body. I have heard fome of my Comrades 
difcourfe, and, above all, the G^/iVw-Spark, whom 
I have formerly fpoken of, as neatly, and as much to 
the purj^ofe, as any of the greateft Minifters of State 
of them all. We know all that paifes moft impor- 
tant, either at Court or in the City, becaufe we go 
eveiy where : We hear all, and fee all, without any 
Bodies taking the leaft notice of us. Good Senfe, and 

pod Undemanding, does not depend upon a good. 

rortune. They are natural Gifts, which,- when 
well cultivated, do not fail to fhine, and even, where 
they are unpolifli'd, have Ibme Luftre. 

When we were met at Night in our Affemblies, 
each reported what he had feen or heard in the 
beft Families that Day. Some, indeed, would talk 
foolifhly of Affairs, but others would difcourfe (b 
gravely and notably, that Standers-by were lurpris'd 
at their Solidity and good Senfe- The Taverns 
and- Inns did not fiirnim us the leaft News, for as 
Wine w^ fold there, which makes People talk, and 
for the moft part. Truth, we learnt there moft of oar 
Affairs of State. 'Tis there that Armies are rais'd, 
the common Enemy's Power baUancM* the State re- 

" • ^^ ' ^ • fonn'd, 


Boot 11. «/ Guzman d^Ifarachc.^ 5 op 

form'd, the Conduct of the Minifters canvafi'd^ and^ 
in a Word,, 'tis there where every thing is faid, and 
•every thing done. 

We judged then, from what we had learnd, that 
thele new Levies were for Italy y tho* it was made a 
Miftery of, and we found it to be fo j for they took 
their Route by La Manchuy extending themfelves to- 
wards Almadovar and Argam^jiUay along the Skirts of 
the Jurifdidion of ToUaoy till they got to Akala de 
Henares and Guadalajara^ whence, advancing to the 
Mediterranean Sea, they were embarqu d at Barcelona^ 
as you'l find by what follows. I could not fleep all 
Night, after I had heard my Comrades fay there 
was all the likelihood in the World thefe Troops 
were for Italj^ for th^t brought into my Mind my 
Kindred at Genoa^ whom I had fOr a long time defir'4 
to fee. I thought I could not fail with them to 
make my Fortune, every Body telling me; they were 
rich, and fome of them without Children, fo that I 
believed I muft needs oblige them, when I ofFer'd 
them an Heir of fo great Merit in my own Perfon. 
This was immediately concluded on, lor I could not 
have a fairer Opportunity than to go with thefe 
Troops : But when I confider^d what Quality my 
Kindred were o^ i;ij6. the Chief of the Nobility of 
Genoay and how ill provided I was to appear before 
them, I was ready to forego my Refqlutions. I could 
then have heartily wifti'd no Body had mentioned 
thefe Levies to me, for, faid I, when I fliall come 
dirty and ragged as I am, and to be fure I fliall be 
more fo before I get to that Country, to prefent my 
felf to their grave Excellencies of the Long Robe^ 
my Kinfmen, and tell them I am their Relation, 
what likelihood is there they will either believe or re- 
ceive me as I exped ? If they fliould be good enough 
to Credit me* on my Word, yet would they not fail 
to treat me like a Rogue and a Rafcal, for prefuming 
to come before them in that pickle. My Father, 

X 5 who 

3 1 e> The Life anJ A^pns - Vixti 

who knew the People of that Country thoroughly, 
was always wont to fay, you muft never truft a Ge- 
noefe, where his Intereft or Reputation are concej-nU 
I was every Day revolving thefe Difficulties in my 
Mind, which all oppos'd my Defigo, yet could not 
make me defift altogether from my V oyage. I had 
hear4 iay. He that has a mind to be Pope, need only 
get it into his Head ; therefore I faid to niy felf. Is 
there any thing an Ingenious M^ cannot bring a- 
bout ? You need only let well about it, and the Bu- 
llnefs is as good as done. Why Ihould I pa(s fucll 
Tiifti Cenfures on my Kindred, who are, perhaps, as 
honeft People as my Father who fpoke againft them i 
They will, no doubt/be very glad to fee me, and have 
that Refped for their deceasd Brother or Unkle, as 
to give me whatever I fhall ftand in need of,- nay, 
very far front treating me as an Impoftor or Villain, 
their Prudence will fuggeft to then! proper pueftions 
to ask me of our Family, and I am prepared to an- 
fvvcr them, being capable of telling them fuch Se- 
crets as they 'I prefently conclude none but their Bro- 
thers Son could ever come to the Kiiowledge of, 
and which being not proper for e;very Boay tcf 
know, the}^l no doybt make .much, of me, that I 
may not divulge than. Thus I hung wavering be- 
twixt Hope and Fear ; fbmetimes I thought I flatter'd 
my felf too much, and at other times beliey*d I de- 
fpondcd without any Reafon. One Day, as I was 
fitting in a Corner of the Market, where I ufually 
took my Poft to be ready when I Ihould be wantea,^ 
1 all of a fudden heard my felf call'd two or three 
times. Turning about to fee what was the matter, I 
faw An. Apothecary of my old Acquaintance, who 
l^eckon'd to me to conie to him. I ran immediately, 
but not fo fwifc but; two of my Companions, who 
were nearer^ to him, had got thither before me. They 
both offered their Services, but he refused them. 
Prcffing to be employed, he cried. Get ye'gone. Birds 

Bdok IL of Guzman cTAIfaracheJ 311 

of Prey, this is not a Morfel for your Chaps, it is for 
my faithful Guz^man. Seeing me come up, he faid. 
Here, open thy Basket, ana at the fame time threw 
in three Bags of Money which he had in the Corner 
of his Cloak. To what Brafier, quoth I, muft I 
-carry all this Copper ? Here's a Rogue, faid he, that 
takes Silver for Copper. Come, up and away, 
proceeded he, for I muft go immediately and pay 
a Foreign Merchant with it, who has Ibid me fbme 
Drugs for my Shop. This might be his Intention, 
but it was not mine, for I look a ixpon thefe Bags as 
fb much Money fent me from Heaven, to deliver me 
from the Milery I had fo long undergone. I had 
done with Hopes, for I thought them mine for cer- 
tain, being in my Poffeffion. I waited only for an 
Opportunity to make fure of them. Open thy Basket, 
laid I,(bftly to my felf : O the blefs'd enchanting Sound, 
worthy not only of an Apothecary, but the greateft 
Phyfician of the whole Faculty^ in as much as they are 
abletocuremeof allmy Maladies together. I folio w'd* 
iny Man clofe, that I might not give him fufpicion 
of me, only now and then I would flay to reft me 
a little, as if my Burden were too great j but I could 
have wifti'd it had beea much greater, fince my De- 
fign was to fteal it. My Mafter walk'd luftily before 
fince he knew niy Reputation, which he had expe-. 
rienc*d more than once, and never fo much as look'd 
behind him: But his Hour was not come, it was re- 
jferv'd for this Blow. I was more than 
firous to meet with fome Crowd or Turning, that I 
might give him the Go-by without Danger. As I 
wim'd. Fortune prefented me with an Occafion. We 
happened to pals by a Houfe which I knew had a 
Thorough-fare, and a Back-Door. I threw my felf 
nimbly through it without meeting any Body; and 
before you could have told Twenty,! was got through 
two or three By-Streets to an unknown Quarter, and 
far enough pflFfrommy Apothecary. I tjien began to 

X 4 ' ' jrefume 

5t a The Life and Actions Part L 

refume my former Pace^ to avoid Sufpicicn, and 
Walk'd as gravely as if I had been going in a Pi^o- 
tcflSon. I neverthelefs verg'd as much as I could to- 
\Vards the Fields ; and being arriv'd at the Gate de la 
iJana^ thought my Prize luire enough^ yet beliiev'd 
It would be but l^rudence to think of other Means to 
prefer ve it. I Aid then along the Rirer^ and from 
thence crofe'd over to Oifa del Campo. I after that 
travcird above an Hour in By-ways, and being pret- 
ty welt got out of Danger, and Night drawing on^ 
1 at lengtji ftop'd m the middle of a thick Wcvod not 
very far off the River, but very diftant from any 
Road. The Moon ihining bright, the firft Thing I 
did was to look out a Place where I might depofic 
my Money fecurely. I could meet with none better 
rtor more private than the bottom of the River j 
where havmg^ made a Hole near two Foot deep, I 
let dowp my Basket and Bags into it, covering them 
with a Urge Stone to keep theip from floating. Then 
I fet uf) a Stake pretty near to know where I had 
left them, and fo went to fleep a? the foot of a Tree 
in Sight pf my dear T^eafure, indifferently well fa- - 
tjsfied, tho' not altogether void of Care. When 
Day-light appeared, 1 went and hid my felf till it was 
dusk ag^in^ when Hunger, which obliges even the 
Wolf to leave his Haunts, made me to think of re-r 
turning ^0 AfaJrid to get Subfiftence, for I knew I 
could not live long without it. I was affur'd, it was 
fafer for one in my tircumftances to go to a large 
City, where I could be beft conceaVd, than expoie 
my felf in a little Village, whither the Report of 
my Theft being cpme, I could not doubt but there 
would be Conitables and Boriholders enough ready 
to apprehend me. I therefore refolved to pals 7 or 
8 Days in the Place where 1 was, which was one of the 
obfciireifl and fecureftpf all the Wood j butthen I muft 
have Provifions, Or ftarve. I determined to venture 
pfl(;e fpr all, ap^ furniih my felf with Wh«t I wanted. 

Book 11. of Guzman d^ Alfarachc g 1 3 

Having Money fufficient, I bought a Hamper^ and 
jfiUing it to the Brim, return'd with fafety to my 
Lodging, where I made good Chear, having not 
eat in Twenty four Hours before. I fpent good 
part of the Night in that Divertifement, and the 
refl: I allotted for Sleep. My Days I jpafs'd agree- 
ably enough in reflerang upon my Conduft, and' 
how I fliould be able to fecure what I had got. 
It is not fufficient to have begun well, or continued . 
to do fo, unlefs one ends the fame. The two for-. 
mer are only Difpofitions, 'tis the laft that Crowns, 
the Work. What would all this fine Prize fignifie, 
faid I to my felf, if I fliould be obliged to reftore 
it, and give my Ears, perhaps my Life to Boot ?f 
I lov'd my felt well, and Money was too ufeful to. 
me to let it go without a Why-not Hitherto all 
was well, and I managed my ProVifions fo, that they . 
might ferve during tlie whole time of my Retreat, 
deHgning to go and get more for my jfourney to- 
foon as I fliould judge it proper to peep abroadr- 
I refolv'd to beat it luflily upon the Hoof, andi* 
not tarry long in aiiy Place for fear of bein^ 
difcover d. I liad the fmeft Contrivances for Mar- 
Icetting that could be, and I fpar'd for no Thoughts , 
that might procure me any Pleafiire. I had it in my 
Imagination to employ a thoufand times more Mo- 
ney than I had, and Fancy with Dainties . 
of all Kinds continually. I did no longer fear to 
appear befojfe my Kindred at Genoa WkQ a Beggar, 
but had already purchased in my Mind the moft 
fplendid Cloaths, and furprizing Equipage. AH my 
Trouble was, to know how much my Capital Stock 
conflfted of, but 1 thought I fliould be a Fool, if, to 
gratifie my Curiofity in that Point, 1 fliould go and 
eiicpofe my felf to be feen ,• for, quoth I, the Devil 
is ever upon the Watch to break the Necks of honeft 
People. Notwithfl:anding all thefe Reafons, which 
lyerc but (oo good, I could not hslp yielding to 


J 14 The Life and Anions Parti 

5he Tcmptarion, for fee I muft. what Cafli I had 
in Bank, and fo I did. The next Day, as foon as it 
was light, 1 went to the Water-fide and took up 
my Basket, well drench'd you may fuppofe, and 
having open'd it in my Place of Retreat, fouiul 
much more Money than 1 expeded. One of the 
B^gs had ;oo Francs in Gold in it, and the whole 
amounted to at leaft 900. I fpent all that Day in 
telling my Treafure over and over, and in putting 
the great Pieces by themfelves, and the little by 
themfelves. I refolv'd to carry the Gold about me, 
that in cafe of Pujrfuit I might not be hindred from 
rnfming, for the Burden would not be fo great. 
At Night 1 put my Basket in the fame Place whence 
I had taken it ; and on the Seventh Day, when I 
thought the Informers had loft their Scent, and were 
weary with looking after me, I w^ent by Night as 
formerly to furnifh my felf with more Provifions 
at Madrid. Upon the Eighth Day, I fifh'd up my 
'treafure again, putting it in my Hamper under my 
Provifions i but as for my Basket, I left that behind 
in the Water with the Stone upon it, having no for- 
iher Occafion for it. Then getting me two lufty 
Cudgels, one to carry my Burden on my Back, and' 
the other to walk with, 1 fet out by Ni^t crofs 
the Fields, taking the Way as near as I could to 
Toledo. I traveird at a pretty round rate, infomuch 
that in Two Night's time I was got to the Sagra^ a 
Territory belonging to Tohdoy and near a cut Wood 
caird Afutfueycay where I defign d to fpend the Day, 
that I might not enter the City till Night. Scarce 
W^s it Day-light, but, tir'd as t was, finding I had a 
Stomach, and that the Place invited me to it, I fat 
me down upon t^e Grais, and being near a Spring;, 
began to pull out my Edibles to refrefli and comfort 
me. I fell to amain ; but all of a fudden wasJnter- 
rupted by a Noife behind me. I look'd back hafti- 
ly, and faw a yoi^ng Man, .mudi about my A|;e, 


Book II. of <3U?man d' Alfarachc. 315 

comiog towards me. 1 ftarted, and fo did he : Wq 
both look'd on each other with Surprile , without 
faying a Word. He feem'd as if he deferv'd Pity, 
tho' he was well Cloath'd, and had a Bundle undei 
his Arm, through which I could difcern both 
Linen and Woollen. I judg'd : him at firft to be a 
Knight-Errant like my felf, and that, ai Infpir'd as 
I was, he had forfaken his Father and Mother's 
Houfe to wander about the World. He ieem'd 
well enough Fed^ and that he had not long been 
wean'd from his Mother's Bre^fts. I faw he look'd 
wilhfuUy on the Breakfaft I had, and as if he would 
not be asked twice to bear a Bob with me. One 
need be only under Advcrfity ones felf to pity tholb 
that are fo. I was generous t© him, ind invited 
him to. come and partake with me ; but he was 
ftrangely embarrafs'd between Neceffity and Shame,, 
for he had not ^uite (hook off tte .latter, as I had. 
Recovering himfelf, an4 being tonipted by a good 
Piece, of Mutton he faw in my Hand, a fwinging 
l^iece of Cheefe that lay by me, and a good Loaf 
of Bread of the fineft Meal, h^ laid afide his Mo- 
defty,, and approaching me, with a thoufand Ac-^ 
tnowledgments, gonfefs'd he had not eat for Twen- 
ty few nours together, and therefore might well 
fee Hungry. I bid hkn fall to, and us'd him like 
a Friend, tho" of but fo fmall , an Acquaintance, 
fie eat heartily,. . as you may imagine; and when 
he had done, we began to enquire of each other 
concerning our Travels, which is. a common thini 
to do. He told me, he came from TokJoy an 
^as going to Madrid ; and 1 acquainted him, I wag 
come from Burgos, and going for Cmrdoua. He 
gave me an Account of the Occafion of his Pilgri- 
mage, and I him fomething like it concerning mine* 
Then 1 ask'd him. How" he came to let- out on a 
Journey without Provifions ? adding. That Knight- 
Errant's Times were no more, who met with a 
" " •. - ^ ■ • ■ . Table 

3 1 6 The Life and AStions Part T. 

Table ready-fpread wherever they came ; but I laid 
I had found by Experience, fo much as a Man car- 
ries out with him^ (o much fliall he meet with on the 
Hoad, and no more. He anfwer d. He fliould not 
have been wanting In that Particular if he had had 
wherewithal, and Time to procure it • for he was 
forc'd to fet out with a little more Precipitation than 
ordinary, and was more laden with Cloaths than 
Money. Neverthelefs, reply'd I, Money is wl^at is 
more neceflary to a Traveller ; and if you were to 
go even on a Pilgrimage to St. Jago^ and had no- 
tWng but your Staff to lupport you by the Wajr, 
you would find you would be ready to be ftarv'd 
oefore you got half thither, fo much is Charitv out 
of Doors now-a-days. What you fay, quotn he, 
with a great deal of Smartnefs, ( for thofe of Toledo 
don't want Wit) is moft true, and I have been 
often convinced of it j but when a Man can do no 
better, what would you have him to do ? AU your 
Arguments in fuch Cafes will be to little or no 
purpofe. Why then, my Advice would be, reply*d 
1, That you made away with part of your Cloaths, 
and turnd them into ready Money, which wpuld 
b^ of greater Ufe to you, and not burden you asf 
they (fo now. That*s what I intend to do, quoth he, 
as foon as I can meet with a Chapman, but which 
I can hardly hope for before I come , to Madrid^ ^nd 
yet I muft live by the way, or die before I com^ 
thither. You are in the right, repl/d I i but if^ 
difpos'd as I am to ferve you to the utmoft of niy 
Power, you would let me fee thofe Cloaths of 
yours, it may be without going further I might 
eafe you of part of them, and give you as much 
ready Money for them as any Body elfe would do. 
My Pilgrim hearing me talk lb, began' to fufpeift 
me J he did not know, but I had treated him fo ge- 
neroufly on purpofe to bring him within my Power^ 
and deprive him of his Bundle, or at leaft part of it, 


BookIL qf Guzman d'Alfarache. 917 

not beii^ able to imagine^ that one, who appeared 
fo mean as I did, and whofe Cloaths were not 
worth many Mara'vedtSy could be able to purchafe 
the leaft part of his Equipage. For my part, I 
Ihould have b^en of th? lame Opinion had I been 
in his Cafe : This Diiadvantage, a bad Appearance 
begets lis. 'Tis good and bad Cloaths that makes 
the common Diftindion between Men. This makes 
them thought . Well or III of j this occafions them 
Honours or Affronts j this procures them Friends or 
Enemies ; makes them of ^high or low Birth ; and, 
in a word, renders them good for Every thing, o^^ 

Nothing, ^ual U baUoy tal te juzgo : As I find youy 
fo I take you to be. Nothing but Outfide panes with 
the World. Believing then I had pretty well guefs'd 
what my young Gentleman thought, as if I had 
feen into the very Soul of him j anaobferving he did 
not anfwer a Word, I Aid my Hand flily into my 
Hamper, and drawing forth a handful of Silver , 
held it up, and cry'd, I fancy little Gentleman this 
will be enough to pay for all I fliall buy of you , 
and if not, I can furnilh you with as much more* 
Seeing this, he immediately left off eating, and 
running to his Bundle brought it, and told me, all 
he had was at my Service. He would have open'd 
it forthwith, but I bid him eat on, telling hinx. If 
he were no more in hafte to be gone than I was, wc? 
ihould have time enough 'to talk of thole Matters 
afterwards. He did as I defir'd, and that with a 
better Appetite than at firft, tho', as I have already 
told you, he began heartily enough. ^ His Hopes, in- 
<Ieed, of eafing himfelf of part of his Burden, and 
procuring Money to defray the Charges pf his 
Journey, prov'd good Sauce to his Meat, and per^ 
haps made it go down the more nlerrily. In the 
niean time, I had no mind he ihould think the lAo-^ 
ney I had fhew'd him was ill got j for it wa$ n<^ 
^^ry natural for him to fuppofe^ t\^% pne^ fo Ul 

3i8 The Life ofuf A^Otts Pattt 

Cloath'd as I was^ could have fo much thaf was not 
lb ; and therefore, to prevent his ill Opinion of me^ 
I faid to him, I have one Piece of Advice to give 
you further, if you are difpos'd to take it, for this 
L believe is the firft Journey you have made, tho' 
*tis not mine by fcveral. You will not be difpleas'd, 
1 imagine, to be inform*dj that 'tis always good, 
when you Travel, to have your Purfe as well lin'd 
fts you can, and your Back as ill, that is, to wear 
the worft Cloaths you have ; for I believe, if I had 
done otherwile, I had been robb'd a thoufend times 
by this, and not had a Penny left to blefs my felf 
with now. A young Man habited like me, occa- 
fions Pity or Contempt in the Thieves, whilft one 
^rtfsd Kke you tempts them. I had, peAaps, as good 
Cloadis as you, or any Man, when I lefcJBur^w, but 
1 ibid them at the firft Town I came at to raife the 
Money you fee me have here : That has been a 

great Comfort to me, whereas a Burden at one's 
iack is no (mall Plague in a Journey. I contented 
my felf with .this miferable Habit, which I was nei- 
ther afraid of fpoiling or wearing, and was woot to 
lay to my felf, A Man that has Money, has every 
Tning. The young Man approv'd highly of ail I 
had laid ; and making hafte to have done eating, as 
If he fear'd I fliould change my Mind, he even with 
his Mouth full of Meat, and the Bread in his Hand, 
went to open his Bundle, whence he drew forth a 
compleat Suit of grey Cloth, a Cloak, Two Shirts, 
Two Pair of Silk Stockings, one Gelilla, and one 
Par of Ruffles. All thefe fitted me exitreamly, and 
fccm'd to hav^ been made on purpofe for me. I 
ety'd on the. Breeches and Doublet, and nothing 
could have fitted better. He could not help. telling 
in^ fo himfelf to make me have the better Opini- 
on of them, and I faw it well enough, tho' I would 
not tak^ any Notice of it. At .length, as I had a 
l^eat PQcafion for a Suit, lanfl he had yet mordfol^ 
^♦^•^'— Mpney; 

Book IL of Guzman d'Alfarache.^ 315^ 

Money^ the Bargain was ftruck. He ask'd me yo 
Francsy and I gave him them^ providing I might 
have his Cloak-Bagw which he confented to, ana I, 
in return, made him a Prefent of my Hamper. 
This Cloak-Bag was what 1 wanted, as well to put 
my Money in, as the reft of the Things which I 
Jbought of him, except the Cloaths which I wore. 
As tor my old Rags, I would not trouble my felf 
with them, but left them hanging on a Tree^ 
as Trophies of my Dexterity and good Fortune. 
My Chapman was well fatisfy'd, and io was I. 
When Dinner-time came, we fet down as be- 
fore, and eat up what I had left, both Mutton 
and Cheefe. We fpent our Afternoon partly ia 
Sleep, and. partly in difcourfing of various Mat- 
ters. When the time for our Departure was come, 
we made each other many reciprocal Compliments. 
He was well pleased to think he had no more fuch 
a troublelbme Burden to bear, and that his Purfe 
was foil; and I was no lefe rejoiced that I was 
Cloath'd like a Prince, and had Mon^ in my 
Pocjcet to Boot. We often turn'd our- Heads to 
falute each other after we parted ^ and at lait^ 
when we were quite out of fight, we had no more 
to do than to purfue each his particular Jbutt. 


3 20 The JJfe and ASlions Part L 

CHAR vm, 

Guzman tells h&w he arrived at Madrid^ and fet 
up for a GalUnt there ^ that having two Intriguet^ 
they both fucceeded unprojperoufly ^ and that at 
length quitting that City^ he was fin/d a fiurvj 
Trick. ^ MalagoiL 

IQot to toltio about Ten at Night ; I comb'd and 
put my felf in order, rubbing the Duft off mjr 
Shoes, that it might be thought I came in a Coach. 
I went to the beft Inn in the City, requiring both a 
Supper and Lodging, like one that was able to pay 
for them. I had no bad Mien5 and conlequently was 
very well ferv'd j for young People, who either have 
or feem to have Money, are always well treated in 
thefe fort of Places, where the Hoft will be fure to 
make what he can of them. I fupp'd well, and flept 
better. Next Morning, after I had had my Choco- 
lat, as is cuftomary for Perfons of Quality to have, I 
took care to provide my felf with new Sho^s, a Hat, 
a Sword, and other Things that were neceffary for 
me. Then I fent for a Taylor to difguife the Suit I 
had bought, to the end that, coming abroad, it might 
not be known to any of the young Fellow's Rela- 
tions or Friends, who might thmk I had either ftolen 
it or worfe , which might have brought me under 
bad Circumftances. The Taylor came, and in lefs 
than five or fix Hours he had fo tranfmogrify'd the 
Suit, that no body could have known it. He had ta- 
k^n off the Coat-fleeves which were of Cloth,and put 
on TafFata ones in their ftead. He haid alio changd 
the Buttons of the Waftcoat , and alter'd the Cape 
of the Cloak tp Velvet, fo that it was fcarpe poffible 


to know any of them again ; and I my fetf migbc 
have been deceiv'd that knew them before. WeU la-» 
tisfi'd with what had been done^ I paid the Taylor 
generoudy^ and vencui^d out about flight to go anil 
walk in the Zocodov&y or great Marketplace^ tho^ 
I was not altogether free from Apprehenfroo of 
meeting (bme^t^y might know me^ yet I could. 
rK)t continue always within Doors. I nevertheleis 
took what Precautions w:ere necei&ry^ never tarry- 
ing two Days in the fame ttm, nor venturing forth 
before it wa^s Duskiik. . I enquir'd if there were any 
new Levies to be made in that City^ and whether 
there were any Soldiers to pafs that way, . but coutd 
learn nothing certain. Whilft I was iauntering 
iibout, and walking ever now and then with the La** 
liies^. I faw every body fo gallant^ that I began to 
be a&am'd of my new-vamp'd Cloaths. When I was 
near any of theie ipruce Bmm^ me thought I k>o)c'(i 
like their Servant ; which I were confirmed in thd 

crofi the 
could not 
but envy bim- Tho' it was Jate, I went to my Loc^^* 
ing5 and determined immediately to fend for my 
Taylor^ that he might make me juft fuch a Suit ana 
Cloak ; but upon Tecond Thoughts y I deferred my 
Refolution till next Morning, and going to Bed^ 
could hardly fleep a Wink for thinking on what 
Garniture I fhould have. A thoufand Fancies raa 
In my ^ead^ but I could pitch upon none. When 
doming came, I began to refleA uponmy Pudbj 
dnd condder'd what fuch a Suit might coft. At length 
I (igh'd, and laid, very well, Guxman^ I find movL 
art quickly weary of being wife. If the Fancy takes 
thee in the Head to be ipruce and gallant, thou^lt 
quickly fool away that little Fortune thou haft^ and 
which thou haft acquir'd with the hazard of thy 
Ears, if not thy Life. If thou haft a mind thofe Dh^ 
cats of thine jQiould Dance, they'll quickly do fo^ and 

next Day, when I obierv'd a very nice Beau 
Square 10 exceedingly well drels'd , that I < 

S^i lU life and Jl^m fartt 

be oue of thy (ight before thou art well aware of 
tiieln. We iftall fefe what a fine C!k)nclt^li ^oult 
bring Matters tof, and what prudent Managers we 
ftait bcL Courage then; let a Suit be made as thou 
woidd'ft hate it^ and let tis CoAirt the Ladies as thou 
Iiaft a Fancy to do^ and fee if we don't come to our 
Basket again ? If we ihould^ where fhail we fkid My 
more' Apothecaries^ that will fiiffer us to gire them 
luch GEfter^^ as we gave to him at Madrid ? All 
theie Refledions <fid but quicken my Inclinations^' 
for Ddy was no fboner cpme^ but I fent for my Tay- 
lor^ and order*d him to make me ju(t iiich a Suit as 
I had feea» and which I gare him an exa<% Deicrip- 
tton of. He promised to do Wonders. I went Hong 
with him to the Drapers^ 'and bought what Ciom 
was necefikry ; as for the Trimmings 1 left that to 
him^ and only required of him to be as expeditious 
as he would be for one that was going to be marri'd^ 
mrii parely fta/d for Ms Wedding-Cloaths.The Tay- 
lor having hetn before (o well paid^ did all he comd 
to pledfe me^ and in two Days J had my Suit up- 
€m My Back very gallant^ fpruce aid magnificent. 
^othSn^ Was wanting that could fet it offy and Gold 
|;litte?a every where. I was now no longer a 
Gentleman that feared to look like anothers Servant. 
£>n the contrary^ they rather looked like mine, I 
liad compleatly the Ai^ of a Mafter^ and thought I 
refembled my Father very much when he was youngs 
fcr I was very well made^ and fo was he. I had a 
delicate white ^nd red Complexion 5 and:, ftir Hair> 
tho* feme what enclihing to Yellow^ as my Fathei^s 
was. My Shape was good ; and altho' t w^s Young, 
my Air ^ Mien and Gate > were what I could wilh 
them. In a wordy I oiight very well' pais for feme 
body. God knows how often I looked in a Glafi; I 
CX)uId hardly be tir'd with it ; neverthblcfe was more 
than ordinary defirous to fee abroad-^ that I ndght 
Ihew my felf; I had no fjH>aer Satisfied ntJT-Tiqr^, 

* but 

BoolE 0/ Gu2m^ cPAI&i^he: iij 

bat I went t>ut in gre«t hafte, arid ria thro' all iht 
StreetsofTo/i^^^fbrellook'dbdiindme. I did not: 
care whether aiiy body knew me^ or I them, a$ loirt; 
^ I wa$« ib wteli dreteU My Hofteis feeing me » 
genteel^ told me^ I ought to have a Lackey^ Z bid. 
her get me one, wMch fko doing, I took niift, and 
foufltfhftn to be one thaf lodt'd like a Page, #herc^ 
fore I had him dre(s*d aecordkigly. Suna^y cdttAhg^ 
I faird not to go and Ihew my ielf ac the ar^st 
Chordi, where 1 knew the fineft Ladies wfere, f or- 
dered my Pagei or Lackey, which you plesile, t6^ 
follow me dole ; and as he was a Kttte Ra^, I ^a*" 
fm to inftruA him how he ftouf d behave hinifelf t& 
db me Honour. The Congregation was gi*ea*, cott- 
fifting as well of Men as Women of tht' greaten CW*- 
lity. I tftru^ thro* them wi A a great deal of Ami* 
nice, and went and v£[ked all the Chapels one after 
anoAer, Kkc a Perfon that had ibme Devbtioft iit 
Ws Head; but, alias! nune wias only to OieW myRig^* 
ging. After I had iriade thhTour, I ftop'd bfctWfecni 
the tWQ Choirs, where were the prindMl ^d ithefEr 
ladies. It was there I dil|>Iay'd[ all the fihe Airt J? 
had leamM at Afydridi and which I had prai^'d oirer 
stnd over in the Morning at my Lookmg-GlaG. B 
expos^ my Cloaths to view as much as I coiild, that 
they mignt draw the Eye^ of the Spe^tors upoil* 
me; ana then I lifted up my Legs from time to time, 
that tjiey might fee my Garters, which were of Ad 
trueft G€mum Mode. I had very fine Buckles in my^ 
%ocs, and confequently toojc care to ihew my Feetf 
as much as was poffible. I flretch'd forth mr Neck; 
and fourd my Eyes about with a languifhing' Ain 
Then P thnift out my Bireaft , flood nrai upon one 
Leg, and tbfi'd the other mto the Air; whidt be- 
ing a^Pdfture not eafy to be continued, I chan^d it^ 
from fime tp time, fomctimes flanding upon one' 
£eg, and fometimes on the other. I bad new Gri-"^ 
macesv accor$ng to the Ladies - 1 look'^d upon; or ^ 
that b>ol&'d upon* tf». I'^fixMt tipoa one, fitnlM^ 

Y a upon 

324 The Life and Anions ^ Fstrtl 

upon another^ ogled a third, and look'd languifbing 
upon a fourth. Li a word^ I behav'd my felt fo ridi- 
culoufly^ that at length the Men^ who law my apiih 
Geflures^ and belier'd me to be a Coxcomb^ begaa 
to laugh out-right^ and fome of the Women did the 
like^ But as long as they looked upon ine^* I car'd! 
hot for that ; I had fo good an Opinibn^or my felfy. 
and my Equipage^that I did not thmk there was any 
dung. ridiculous in nie^ but rather took. their Laugh- 
ter for a Token of -their Efteem and Admiration. 
As for the Women, quoth I, whp dote upon every 
thing that belongs to a Mah,^ even his greateit Fol- 
lies, if they lau^ at me, it muii be fuch as I have 
hot look'd fo kmdly upon as I have upon others; 
for ibme I'm dtte have xts£ovi to believe me rank'd 
among the Number of their Adorers. So it fell out,. 
and for which I fufier'd, as you will hear hereafter^ 
There were two above the reft that form'd- Schemes 
againft my Perfon, or rather againf^ my Purie. I 
knew of the Pretentions of one, and encourag'd them ; 
but as for the other, I. knew nothing of the Matter^ 
and could attribute them only to the Stars. The for- 
mer had a Face good enough , look'd a little Ro- 
j;uifli, yet had fbmething that pleas'd me exceeding- 
ly. I gave her Ibme Tokens of my AiFedion , but 
like a Novice, which Women like better than the 
Proceedings of your thorough-pac'd Lovers. I was 
riot, of an Age to be very expert in that Art. She on-* 
ly made a Return to me once; but I underftood hex, 
and which charm'd me. extreamly. She contented 
her felf, during the reft of the Time of Devotion^ 
to loolc' upon me only now and then by Stealth, but 
that^ moft tenderly and ;pa{fionateIy, and I did the 
like to her. as well, as I could. Mafs being over, fee 
went'away,and I follow'd her as I thought it became 
me to do. ^he walked gravely along to give me time 
to come up with her, Allien I foohdid - and as I 
weiit behind her, :I would ever now and then fay 
feme £bft Thinji; to l{ej; as w]pll as I was aSI;.She made 

Bookn. of' Guzman <i*AIfarach& 32^ 

HO Reply, yet ever. now and then tum'd back, and 
gave me a laneuHhing Look with her great Eyes, 
<which I took for an Indication that flie durft not 
fpeak fi)r fear of the Duenna that followed her clofe* 
This Conftruftion I put upon her Silence, but I was 
yeiy well fetisfi'd for all that, A little matter ferves 
in tlieie fort of Affairs, and I fuiFer'd my felf Iq be 
cmangFd by her Lime-twig like a young Sparrow; 
I became every Minute more Amorous. At length, 
walking in this manner, we came to a Street juear 
St, Cyjrians Church, where flie liv*d. Entejing heir 
Houle, the only tofs'd back her Head as a figq of 
thanking me for my Trouble, and fo we parted* My^ 
Heart was top-full of Love and Joy, and fo I pa'rti« 
cularly tdok notice of the Street and Houle wh/sti^ 
fte llv'd. I was no fooijier got into another Straej^ 
but I was attacked afrem by a fort of WaatirigTWon 
«nan with a great Cap oh her Head. Sh,e' ftay'd fpjc 
me at the Coriier of the Street, and made Sigaitor 
hie to felldw her; which I did, being defirous *|ta 
know what flie would have with me. She. did. not; 
Carry me far, for the firft Ttfrt'cocher we came tQ^'Sk^ 
entered, and I after her. 'When We were theSre alone,' 
and (he thought no body could hear, Ihe began with. 
^ long Ekcomimn upon my perfon, telKiig me, X 
muft not' be furpris d , if being fo Charmjng and. 
G^ilfteel aSli v^ds, I had won upon a Lady of Quali-' 
tv who had Icen me in the'Oiurch ][ ganie fipip :^ 
She (kid^ Ae iiame from th^t Lady to s^equaiijit m^ 
with the 'tfdvantagious Opinion Ihe had of m?, 'and 
that (he mult needs know where I lodg'd, She; told, 
me moreover, her Lady was a Perfcn of great Qua« 
lity and*lef}t, newly marrl'4, fair to Perfe^ion^and > 
Whom I'W&ft be* tttore thaii ordinarily Happy to Jipve: 
mov'd^flrt'thfeflitt'ffghtj butftefiid, (hewqul^^idt 
me tie more of her, and leave me to cohciivjethe 
reftiwhen^I few her; which; xf I thdughtlfiit;,'! might ' 
(ooaiol itWattdw'd all this Bait With a great deal 

g2^ Tbt JJfp 0ii JStitrn ! iPartl 

of Grcedineis. and could, luirilly copcaiii nnr felf for 
the Pleafure I had in hearing k. I imil'd« lappeir'd 
modcft^ making her from time to time leveral Uccle 
Bows to (hew my Gratitude^ but that without inter- 
rapting her^for I had too great a SatfsjbAifHi in hear* 
ing her taUc to do that. But at lengthy when I found 
Hie had done delivering her Embailj^ affumiiyj; an 
Air of Grandeur intermixed with toma foftneis^ I 
tnfweii^a this intriguing Gi^^^ that I wa& ^together 
confounded at fo great an Honom* done me by a 
lady^ whom I had not the lea^ deierv'd it of | that 
I did t^ot doubt but ihe was a Perfon <^ great Quality 
ttd Merit, and flie had not addrefied her^ ieff to c«ms 
ef inferiour Rank, which I wouldj coftvincc her of by 
iny CotiAxiiSty not being willing to let her Lady come 
€0 my Lodging , but that 1 would wait upon her 
wbereibever ihe would plea& to ai^pcnnt i;ne» and be 
fe^idy her all the ServifC^ flv^ could s^^^tH 
west. Here the Qmfidmu intierrup^d me,, telijmg me^ 
her lady could not expo^ me (b much to the Fuiy el 
a Jealous Husband, as to let me come-tny where td 
her: bur had giyen her Orders to kwv^jpri^yi^ 
Lodj^g, that ihe might wait upon^mq wij^ l^eaiqr 
Security to us bodu It being a Thing iq^ilifeilKtSi 
told her where I lodged y which was. w oqe <tf ^ 
princii^af Inns of the Cky. Hearing tl|i«,: ilie def 
elGng me^ her Lady woidd ,So impatkiBi t» 
iSucceisofbenCommiffiony ; ' .;;; 
1 ^pught. when I came but cardie HCbiirSh, I 
fbouM nave but one Intnguc to nviai«fk )wt yourfte 
I did not go far before M^4 ^^o- Nev^f«h^Mi> ^ 
this laft feem'd to n«i a little Jljmmtipks.^fm hanog 
i^en the Perfon had been mentioned K> Vti Iwa$ 
encfin'd to lean .toward^, ^e otbfU!, ixHbor ^raa if^ 
&st$ a handfoofieWomi^.^d- had flK^Her pof^ 
ie^Td my He^rt^ ^^i^^h^isEn^^^ 
hoWeter, M^d mie w eiceedingiyi ttfd tAMe^iM 

\^0t tl :^p^ yaia^ ^ faid^l $fl jpy iei^ )rim 

^ Adrahtage itis co be wdl4)0iti^ for I find I Ihatt 
gukkly itieikible my Father as nearly as one Drop 
of 'Water eao aiiother. I did bat make my Appea^ 
ranee a Kttte in riiis City, and two Ladies, perhafft 
the moft beauti&l in ToMo^ are imiiiedia^nrli^eii 
In love u^th me. What may I not hope for^it I con^ 
tinue here lofig, fihce my beginning has been fb foic- 
tnnate ? I tefoiv'd, neverthelefi, not to be to6 lavifli 
oi mV (elf^ but to know who i had to deieil witlu 
thit I Mi^t.fupfiOtt my felf the better. W«h thett 
fSteafin^lndiights I went co my Lodging5which tho^ 
jdiey fifl'd mv whole Head, yet they did not hinder 
me fix>m dining. I had a go6d Stomach, and was not 
a lidver l^guifl^ng enough to baulk my AppsAts. 
1 love Soiidfty, «nd could liot be well iinpo^d upeii 
b}^ * trifling Aiiwuf. 

7he Hme of commodioufly willking the Streeos 
wis ndib)§fier come, bi^ I^epar'd to go and ibemir 
frit W£tritf^i &>r as for the other^ I knew not whem 
i» find her, ly^ was I very Solicitous abocit it, ik 
Joaking mMn itft> be a Defign-upon me* I-p^fs'd 
dtid repatt'd' through the Strreet where my tormet 
Mfti-els livVf^ iffld look'd very earaeftiy at her Wift^ 
dows, but obul^'Jidt &t 10 much as the Shadow of A 
"Domini appear.> At length, towards Night I faw ft 
lower Wirldow hi^If open^ \viuch approadiing caii^ 
XidUfly, I fouttd ttere was what Z inpft deftr'd. ' She 
leenfd to be under great Stiprife on accoimt of the 
Ketghbourtioieid^ who {hi Ml were all tattling Peo^^ 
frfe^ and therefoft fhe defir'd nke to come again ill 
two Hoim* and if I pieas'di I.niight fup with hei^ 
foir thitt there «ifb no body iri the Houfe but her &\t 
Axid Servi»lts, who were her i^aiifldents. Heaven 
knows^ htfw i w;iis 0?er-ioy'd a; fhis Proffer^ and 1 en« 
i&t^&at^'totaaitto her fenfible I was not a Petfeif ca« 
f^ble df fefttfKig fb^gftat m Honour. I begVl her at 
^ lame tlnKe^to let n^ biing iriy Dilh along with 
m^iTfS UrIsltiH ikk Mkf^fdi l^hat^wasl altogethei^ 
' - Y 4 lwneg«^ 

32.8 ^ The Ufe and ASims ; P^l 

uoneceflanr ; but for fear I mieht not Hke what was 
prepar'd^ I mjjght do as I thought fit. Thus our Dif- 
courfe ended for the preient, and having referred- the 
xeft tiU iNight , we parted with reciprocal Aif$ of 
Tendemefi. I was io well pleas'd with thk Ad^^fi- 
ture^ that I hardly toucK'd Ground all the way I 
went home^ fo brisk and gay I wa$. I tnunedlately 
gave Orders to my Lackey or Pag^^to go and get me> 
;fts fpeedily as the Time would permit^ a rQaAedDiib, 
as dx^uin&e and nice as oould be got. It confifted of 
Partridges^ Quails^ Leverets^ and many other Things 
f>i the juceft kind. I added to it fev^fal Bottles of 
iBXceilent Wine^ and a Defert of the choiceft Sweeo* 
meats and Fruits. AH this was ready^ and lent at the 
JHour appointed^ and I foon fpUpwed^ becaufe I 
would not have fo good a Supper i^il'd- At my Ar- 
jival I was very kindly receiy d by my Nymph, yet 
could not h\x% obferve a greaf: deal of Gonc^m-in her 
Countenance* She conduced m^ - inune^ately to 
htt Chamber^ which was neatly fet. out, and for Pii- 
yacyViake had order'd the Table to be ^ead there, 
Vhich was weU cover d. I was well- fatisfied with 
iiheie good Beginnings, which promts'd nothing but 
iivhatw6uld be agreeable for the future; yet, as I.per- 
ceiv'd, the Sadneis in* her Looks ftill cominu'd, and 
Ae appeared uneafy in whatever ihe faid qt did, I 
|>Ut on a bold Face, and ask'd Mri Whether any 
thing had h^ppen'd finee my ieeiag her laft, that had 
occafioo'd her any Difturbance } She anfwer'd at 
liril, th^e had not;, but, at length iteming unwilling 
jtQ conceal any thing from me, fh^ tpid me. That 
firice her Appointment with me, her Brother was 
fotsit ftom Madrid y where he had been (p iblicitea 
Coiut-Prefermentj. that fh6 knew n^t^ wh©re to 
fend ' to me, or £he would have given me notice 
pf it; that £be wasv unwilling ' tOi break her Word 
with me, and cpniequenti\r wpuld net turn me away 
Syhcn fhe. f^w ^ic ap 0ie Doof, /or («i« tfa^t might 

Book n. of Guzman d'Alferach& 32^ 

have caus'd me to have had an ill Opinion of hen^ 
She acquainted me moreover, this Brother of hers 
was a Perfon of a very fevere Temper, and over- 
nice in Poii^ts of Reputation. She laid, he was. ex* 
tfeamly Impetuous ana Violent ; but chat being gone 
to fee Tome Friends of his in the City, whence he 
was not accuftomed to return before Midnight, ihe 
hop'd he would not come to difturb their io happy 
Meeting. This Conclufion of hers feem'd locly 
enough J but ftill the coming of a Brother of fb im- 
.petuous and furious a Temper, at fo unfeaibnable a 
Time, could not but abate part of my Satisfadion ; 
and, to fpeak Truths 1 would have given Ibm^thing 
that I had had Notice of it before.; for altho' 1 was 
naturally none of the.greateft Cowards, yet 1 w&s 
fitter to feem Brave, than appear really io. In cafe 
of fighting, I had much rather have a large Field 
to traverle in, than be copp'd up in ^ a Chamber/ ai$ 
I was like to be heire, where i nrnft fight, or bfe 
kiird ; But, as the Matter ftood, thfere-was no Rertifi!- 
dy. I therefore feem'd altogether indifferent and 
refolute, telling :my Miftrefs, we^ould fup, come 
what would on t ; and that if her Brother fhpuI4 
happen to interrupt us, he might chufe what Pto^ 
ceeding he pleas'd, for as for ray part I fliould not 
troij)Ic my Head about it. I was ready to defend 
niy feif, and that was all an honeft Man could di 
She thep orde/d Supper to be brought up j but \^ 
was no fooner fet on the Table, but dils curfec 
D^v^ of a Brother came, and knocked io furioufly 
att^Popr, as if he would have broke it down, 
My Miftrefs immediately fell a trembling, or at 
Jeaft counterfj^iced doing (b, and I in good earneft 
began to grow pak and (hiver. The Servants feem'd 
afraid likewife, .and as if they knew not what to dpi 
I look'd abput for a hide in, and was 
going to creep under the Bed j but Madam thought 
» m 0*9 wS f^ ^^ ti9r felf in n»pre proper^ and 


:^^ti rh^ tJfe'mid ASUchs tm^ 

.lb I was dlrnft nhder chat. It ftood by her B«d^^ 
, «n45 the better to conceal mey (be threw a Tiplfj^p 
.Carpet over tne.' I lik'd ihar well enoQg^b; Ibitft 
.ibe .Tub y9» cbnfoonded wee and nafty> I 
been us'd but a ^ IMtle befbri^ and not wimld 
:TH^CttHedBtoiherenter'd; and feeing thii 
JDOi )¥4H 6oter*d^ (nttended to be forpris'd^' 

S}ip-9k Word for ibme time \ but at length br< 
ljfitc«| fttiiottfly . he cry'd to his Sifiet 
491 !(A woAdet> Hey day ! What's th 
4A r^ieid great Preparations^ and wh< 
;peft Mre to Night to help ydu off With alt^"^ 
Aoe Ptfliei^ No Body^ Brotshei'^ but ; 
ihi9 cunnifttly, who could 1 expe^ i 
;P^'d he} X ou donTt ufe to treat me after thif^ 
imd how you flumld come to doit n^w^ ^^^^ 
ipine : It Was to Wekome me frdm^M^^/ri' 
jFa^t.IjQeiAe tell me^ was ic not? Itrii 
AouM Mt «oAie home before Midnight^ 
WM ^tolV' be beforehand with me^ 
^hixigs rtildy ajj^aioft I came. I did fe 
Ufothtf^ qdotln ihe $ for tho' you always; 
yw Won't coflke hdme till it be late^ you tfftdlK 
and; Atfipnie vat^ as you have dpnt now ; kJT 

fpu jare Khtiy that your Supper is not tt&^^ .. 
[weiu rtfwdr now to prevent. Well^ SUttili^'l 
[hlyi <«U you thqf much/ reply 'd he, ThatwhHi 
05 <lpe$ by »;> medns pleafe me^ and I do jfift 
lOft Jbiu yon haji^ given more than luflicidiK: 
^ t^ Che Nc^g^ibodrs to talk of yoU as ^ ' 
^(^Iciiffw faowi mireU Reputatioh ought Yd be 
^ mwg Lady of your Qoafity, and liow f 
fly Nice I aiidri that Point ; and yet fof 
give me thefe CHi^fions tb Mft6t you^ 
Si^er^ Vm s^bmdd vi you. But letV is^ 
fmxfi you fiiy ydtt*#e ^provided 'it fctr me> 
waipds we'l mk mdr^. He thi^ &U t& 
tf ^e P^a h«l>p9ii h^hin>y M bfe 



BodklL rf Guiman d^Alfitrache* ^ji 

fter far down with hitn^ wfadlft ^f ly for M^hoth 
thofe Dainties had been prepai^d^*lay iMder die Tvh 
without tailing a Bit. As he ^eat^ he ^ -nt^ 
thing but murmur and growl ar lAi Siilef j 4h9 
whenerer fhe (poke^ he would % In e Pa^M 
with her^ a$ if he would hssfc GSc htt i^Oy tiUk^r 
ing of nothine but Killings Sl^iitt;^ Md Mprde^ii^. 
Ever now ana then I ventured foftlrlo lift ap ii^ 
Tub» to fee if he was fiidi a t^ml^te !MlOW af li^ 
fpoke himfelf to be ; but his oonfinjud) ftiniiite abi^u^ 
prevented my giving ii^ felf ths^t Saf !ifa^oh. I 
was plaguily afraid he would fee me. aiiid that thiM 
me treiBble every Joint of me. At faft^ howerist^^l 
got fo€h a fight of him^ a^ gave tile fhflSdetit Rodoil 
to believe he was mote a ivtily eKiatti S Wito^jet' i 
darft not attempr my Libetty^ fd m^h my Hteri 
was funk. My CoimnemeM w§s4m^ ihsok br^bai 
17 abiding to me whilllrhe enjoyed Mfbfetf itB^ 
at Table^ where he had beeri noW M^te ffii H^iir^ 
and which! thought m Age^ bdingMloi atble tti^ 
comprehend how fd p%(SonA»r a R^oW eou}^ (9 
bi^ concimie Patie^t^ tfK>' in eetirig;^- 1 wds cieii 
Biad to tlunk cm'r^ and wfft'd a thdfiddAd tkne^ fx^* 
would leave me ibmething ; for Fe»j^1i]|d iioe fb iU 
together taken away my Appetite htit 4 i¥te ifeady 
ro die with HUngir, efp^ally Wb£h 1 heard hm 
hu Chap weM, He (eem'd to^ m€ tin ^hrpof^ tha^ 
be m^iit leave me only Bones td fiel^ Witt nfd^ 
the Sifter, (aid I to my k\iy i&tkmSikf^Cy ^ ^M^ 
(ier^ and fet a*Bit by for C<^ifeien6e-^ke^ fmce |hC 
knows^^I have noe :fu|)p'd/tod wcM|M begM df mt' 
ourfed Brothel^s Leavings if he #€fttld bif bfat g6ne. ^ 
What was yet mo^ tormenAig^ hfen^t cwly eir 
Iw^ftily, but dranfc' fitiore heautlfy^ fer of iHtr 
Four Botde^ of Wine I had ienf ill/ (re k^ etttp^^ 
tied fhree befoite Supper was ©tter. I rctafconyf it* 
latft upon the Feurth; b^t I teA^difiOioat rttf 
H6ft3 a^ttit Si^^ng i$s for^O^^lk) hcii^^ 


352 . The life and Anions * PartT 

jrajkeo away than he caird for Pipes and Tobacco, 
to make an ead^ as he (aid^ of the Lait. A terrible 
^mence this to me ; but^ to compleat my Misfor- 
tiine^ his Sifter having faid to him^ he would do 
well to go and Sitaoak in his own Chamber^ and 
leave her at Mberty to uhdreG her felf and go to 
Bsd 5 he anfwer d briskly^ She might do as ihe 
p}eas'd ; buc^ for his part^ he was reiolv'd to Q>end 
i^ho jNight there^ and that for good Reaibn. Truly 
X now gave my felf up for loft, when I heard this 
iaft Relolution pf this mad Brother^ and could not 
but think feme of the Servants had betray'dns^ and 

Siven him Intelligence of our Feaft. But this would 
^ aye been nQthii^ if I could have been quits for 
raying for the^*. Supper without eating any of it^ I 
liould iK>t have matter'd thatj but to Ipend the 
whole Night under a nafiy Tub^ upon the bare Pave- 
men^^ 9nd during ,the Pieafure of a drunken Sot^ 
who I knew jiot -when . he would give over, that's 
ha^i youl J(ay«' It.did notp^eyle me by any means^ 
and i own I was lb r«duc'd^that at laft I was.oblig'd 
9? pray^ which I had not done in a good while be- 
lore^ and promife Heaven I would jEiever engage in 
the ^ike Folly ;agaiA if I might be^ but deliver'd from 
this^ wbiQh Heyi^hek^ I had fuifer'd with fb much 
Jiiftife. l^he/C|;^ing Gipfy of a Sifter feem'ddit 
dieas'd that heif IV^^tenaed Brother drove her out of 
ha^,Cbapiber;^:and would needs.atgue the Gafe> with 
liim } but^ 4e toM her> it was his I^Ieafure^ and £he 
muft obey. Behold me then! all alone^ with this 
Fellow, i|i the- Chamber^ daring fcarce. to breath or 
itir for fear ^o|[:^ing difcover'4 tnd dreading to 
let a F-;tj mq^e than I fhould have done to Hoop or 
H9U0W at anotheof'.time. For his part, he had a 
t^6H^^Kl ^itto'enit (fi^ftupes^ H^ith his Pipe alwavs in 
his ^(Cou(h 4 icpieti^ie^ he would fit in one Pofture^ 
Iindr6metini/esf.i^. pother ^j (bmetimes he woukl 
Vig^^ i9m^%\^mfi^9 mi fomf Ctwes flouriih-his 

Bookn. 0/ €u2mJta d'Alferaiphc. ^3^ 

Swofd^ and fence againft the Hanging^. He whiil- 

led, he fung, he fwore, he ftorm'd, he flampf'd^ , 
he put himlelf into the qiofl violent Paflions as 
a Man chat was either drunk or m^d, or both» 
I waited till he fliQuld fall a-fleep ; but^ alas ! Wine 
had not the fame EfFeA upon him as it has upon - 
others^ for he only tols'd himfelf upon his SifterV - 
Bed^ without undreffing; and having his naked 
Sword and Piftols by him for greater Caution Vi«ke^ 
lay finging almoft all the Nignc Whenever I made 
the lead Noife with my Tub, which I lifted up 
fometimes to hear whether he flept or not, he would 
leap up upon his Breech, and cry out as loud as he 
could haul. Who's there ? I fhrunk into my 3heU a«: 
gain, and never thought Night fo long as this. ; At? 
lafL t>^y beginning to appear, I heard him ihorft 
to iome purpofe, and then I refblv'd to venture forth^ 
and to deliver my ielf from fb gpcsLt Mi^^y* I. 
puird off vay Shoes that I might make no Noiie>. 
and taking them in my Hand, (lid foftly along to « 
the Door, which by good Fortune I found only* 
latch'd I open'd it gently, and making hafte to- 
the Street-Door, I law the Key hang i^, by ir>» 
which piece of Good Luct I believ'd I owVi to*. 
the honourable Sifter. Without lofmg any more^ 
time, i open'd the Door and got out, trudging it. 
away as f aft as I could towards my Lodgings, ei:-; 
treamly well pleas'd that I had Rot p^ar of fy, 
rough, a Fellow gt fo cheap a Rate. Whep I oam^ opr^ 
our Inn I. found no Body up, not fb much as my lit-j 
tie Rafcal of a Page ; So that'ooc beinig wilfiiiK tO: 
difturb the Houle, iwent and loitered at a Pal&y- 
Cook's^ defiring to tafte of his Pafties,, for you muft^ 
imagine I was plaguy Hungry. He gave me fome> 
and I eat them heartily, which was no fmall Com* 
fort to me after my fo unlucky Adventure ; which 
taught me, that a Man could not be (aid to be 
till he faw the End of what, he proposed to 


'334 The Ufe and ARioHs fartl 

At Utt pui Doon were open*d^ and ib I fKd in to 
B0d as ibon as I coold^ being confoundedly tkd 
with my hard Lodging tkc Night before^ and my 
Watdiil^ ta Bdbtl^ for you mttft think I could not 
flMp with fo many Fears :lbout me. When all came 
M m^ I could not fle^ now neither^ at lei^ for the 
ttefimt, femachtbev^ares and Fears of that l^Hght 
mintM ttif Spirits : Bat at lengthy I did llMp^ 
and that ibmidly: I had not lain long before my 
Bcwcaane ind wak'd me, tetlins me^ two Ladies 
htK)^ defu-Vl 10 r^k with me. I ask'd him hafiily 
iiiFhe they ^^^^j and he told me. One^ by her mag-* 
nMceiit Habit^ (dem^d to be Miftrefs to the otifer^ 
but that both were well dreG^d. I preiemly guefi^d 
tK(s WAS the linlmown Lacfy that pretended to be 
lA ;tO¥e wiih me, as in effeft it was. I had hot much 
§MMt bid n^ Lackey deflre them to walk m^ than 
Ifyw^lJtiy ptitet perfeAl^ well drefs*d^ who by her 
Ahr and Mien itould not in my Judgment be leii 
than a>fiu:^one6 or Couniels. She had with Imst 
th^&iid fV^man'Aat acoofted me m the Streer^-and 
VfhoMft&ui i^i^ Doior whi% her Lady ventbr'd 
Withi^ tk^ BmiUe^ and came bncf (at down by liiy 
Bed-iidd I made her Ten thoufimd low Bow^/beg- 
^il#^k ftfiiUiin bl^ Fardon9 for my Rudenefi in re- 
^vltig lier Honeur after that M&ti bat I told fuir, 
iti^ii(»!ix^iddi m ilhat Natui«, than have 

iMdo^hir JHkmovtr watt ac the Door/ tho" but for a 
MbltfHIiL * T aoiiq^finted^ her fhOfieot^r^ if I couM 
biiflhsi^'bii^'^^rm^d of the Grace and Faiour 
Am iM'^dwpy I Would haTe^ takeik Care not to 
faiV8%^* fiifpm$&L ^At iindecelit Pbfture^, bdt pre- 
^BuftS:0f'S&W » m^ itcer/d her Honour with all 
theRefpeftaMDdbrwceduetobi6r<^^^ She 
to^^tm itotiod <^/iif CompBmencsfy only nowand 
theii^bbw'd her^^lKi ; aoclin truthyt had ho f^tk 
l^iteibn^ to MjUte^i^niahy Apolc^s' for the Co^- 
ti»^^M#m0U,b«anffina'g6odSilkB^^ with' 

the fineft linen^ ahd every Thing alterable about 
me. She being defirous to com? to the Bufint ^ Of 
her Vifit, forthwith as k'd me. How lohg I ha4 becii 
in Tekdo ? If I were like to ftay there any t|mc ? 
What I came about ? Whence I came ? Who I wajr ? 
and a great many other fuch-likc Queftionj, whig^ 
I found no difficulty to ^fwer, bdng natur^ly pf * 
ready Wit, and a fruitful Invention, e^ecially wheje 
a Story was to be tpld on the Spot. Thfe wa? my . 
Talenc j fo I quickly (atisfied her as to my ([Jhiality^ 
my Bufi£ie6>«nd my Continuance at Qourt. | fejyf^ 
only in one Thing, and that was, in tilling her t 
came, to Tokdo only on account oiF Pfeafiire, ^nd, 
that I (hould not continue there Ipng. by which &« 
judg'd I wa> not a proper Perfon ^r ner j ther^ore 
immediately ruminatea in her Mind how fhe ioight 
pull a Quill from fuch a young Qooft ^ I waj. and 
not alfiogether Tofe her Labour. She hkd a larger 
Veil OR her Head, iuch as the Ladies of our Coiuv- 
try are accuftom'd to wear, whicH haying put a Ut- 
tle aSAe^ fiie difcoverd a fine Face, afterwvdj ^de- 
licate white Nejpk, di\4 at length cbrious M?hitft aad 
weil-fliap'd Hands, ^ith Rings on her Fipgers tfea; 

{rlitt^t*a and dazk^d n^y Eyes weedingly. Af^ 
en^h Ihe pulM her Yeilouite ofF, and then appesc^d^ 
a CHirlous Shape, an,d moft magpificept iPreiC Sh», 
iJext drew a fine Corjl Rofiaj out of Jier Poc^eir, bus 
all with a negpge^t Air, and a? if file did npt ||iiiul^ 
wh^t fte did- This^pfm was c;xccidjpg^ ri^h, fQ-" 
coi^am^d with Gold Croffes, K^Qlicks. pFecv^ufe 
Stei^, ah(|' other fuch-like Religiqus Qa^i^ncd^ of 
gceai Vaipe. W*^ '^^ — si/-._^ . : ^ . 

wieH Ker 

iilft file wtt dfconrfiog^ m^ an* 

^ _ l^fatjy alt of |i fudd?a fh^ G(ias'd 

ottkii%, feeli^ tnh^T Pocjcec, tod ipokiijg »Qm4 

.^ as if 4he ftgi ToijI fcAnewl^ Att thU w^ fta 

' fai<!-n<iia Wor«, bu; fufta^dy diftover*d bet S\ir, 

prlft |>y-ber Eameftne^i and Inqutetflck f%ijjacdi. 

•cely a^ a IM' wh^ vra; the' matter. Sta am^er'd 


^6 The Ufe ami A^hns lattl 

nothings but feem'd to afflid her felf incefTantly. 
This augmented my Trouble and Curiofity^ info- 
much that I r^quefted her a (econd rime to tell me 
what (he had loft, and that if it was any thing in 
my ChAmber^ I Ihould afliiredly find it^ and would 
reftore it to her again ^ be it of what Value it 
li^ouIdL She would not anfwer me yet^ feeming 
more and more concerned ; but at length calliDg 
her Servant^ (he told her^ She muft immediately go 
home, ftnd fee for her great Gold Crofs thlit hung to 
her Chaplet which her Husband had given her^ for 
that ihe feared fhe had loft it, and flie had rather 
lofe her Life ; fb rifing up to be gone^ (he would 
have left me. I begged of her with all my Might 
not to go away for that^ telling her, there were 
Crofles' enough of the fame kiqd to be had at the 
Ooldfiniths ; and in cafe (he had loft it^ if fhe pleas'd 
but to tell me what fort of one it was, I would loon 
procure her another. She refus'd my Offer: and be« 
ginning to lament more than before^ begg d of me 
in the tendereft manner to let her go, proinifing to 
come and vifit me again the fame Day^ providmg 
ihe found her Crofs ; and tho' fke fhould notj fte 
would be fure to come the next Morning betimes. 
IJpon this fhe left me very fad and melanchoUy 
that fhe would needs be gone in that manner ; for 
ihe Was in Truth, a hanolbme Woman^ with a good 
Air^ and feem'd to have been bred at Court. She 
had likewife a great deal of Wit. In the mean time^ 
as I had not flept all the Night before^ and but little 
chat Morning, being wak'd, forfooth^ for this Lady 
of Quality, i had a huge mind to take t'other Nap^ 
ootwithftanding my Love and other Adveatores; 
but which did not uft long, for I could not fleep 
heartily with fo many Cares in my Head. Beiqg 
broad awake^ I drefs'd my felf^ and Diaxier-time 
being come^ plac'd my felf at Table j but where I 
was a6 fooner fet^ dian the Lady of Quality's Wor 

Book IL tf Guzman d*AIfarachc. j 3 7 

mztiy with a Horfe-Pox to her, came to difturb me. 
After having made me the common Compliments oxj 
the part of her Lady, flie began, forfooth, to tell me, 
with a' mournful Countenance, they could not fioi 
the Gold Crofs neither high nor low \ and that her 
Lady had laid it upon her, becaufe fte had prefs'4 
her fo that Morning to come and fee me j that fliQ 
had been * all over the ToWn with all the Gold- 
imiths tO| find a Crofs like it ; and that at l^it ihe 
had met with one to her Mind, but having no Mo^ 
ney-—- I prefently cortiprehended herj and being 
generous to Profutenefs, interrupted and told her, 
it was but a Trifle for her Lady to trouble her felf 
fb much about. ' She reply 'd. It was not for the Va* 
lue o{ the Gold, but becaufe her Husband had given 
it her, that fixe w^s^ fo concern'd at the JLoft of it, 
he being naturally Jealous; and one that would be 
apt to believe Ihe had made a Prefenf of it to fprne 
Gallant or other j for {he was naturally very Liberal, 
and gave away moft fhe had. This pleas'd me yery 
well in a Woman, where Generofity doeij not eom-r 
monljr abound. I gave the Servant to underftand 
Ihe might depend upon the Crofs fhe had (een at th© 
Goldfmiths, and that if Ihe would but have Patience 
till I had din'd, we would go and Purcbafe it to- 
gether. She, who came on no other Account, wa$ 
very well fatisfy'd ; and while I were eating did. 
not fail to fet forth her Lady's Charms, and tho 
great Kindnefs fhe had for me j aflfuring me, fti.e 
would not for Ten thoufand-Worlds break her Wor4 
with me, but com,e punc^tually according to her Prp- 
mife next Morning, When Dinger was oyer, Iwen^ 
with her to the Goldfmiths and bought th§ Crpfs, 
which coft me 40 Francs, Having fo done, | gave 
it her, bidding her cell ber Lady, I did not loojk 
Upon that as a Prefent worthy her Accepcance } byt 
confidering the Qccafion that offerd, I made bold W 

repair ph^ J-pf^, tho' Innocent, fincQ it h^id been in- 

3[3S The Life and Anions Fart t 

curr'd on my Account, and in my Chamber. The 
Woman, overjoy'd, gave me a Thoufand Thanks on 
her own p^rt, promifing to make her Lady ac- 
quainted with my gallant and generous way or Pro- 
ceeding, which (he did not doubt would abundantly 
confirm me in her Favour, tho' I had already to 

freat an Intereft in hen This iaid, we parted, 
had Thoughts of following her to fee where her 
I«ady liv'd, but befides that I imagih'd it would dii^ 
pleafe her, and fpoil all, I had an Inclination ta 
go to my other Miftrefs, who tho' ihe had not fo 

food an Air or Face, I Hk'd better, becaufe her 
^auty was more natural, and le]& broken. I wa& 
not a little defirous to unriddle the Adventure of the 
Brother : I waited a proper Tim'e for't, and at length 
law my Miftrefs at her Window, who no fboner 
ipercetv'd me, but fhe made Signs to me to be gone^ 
for fhe had Compaffy with her. I neverthele^ ftay'd 
thereabouts, and in lefs than a quarter of an Hour 
obferv'd her to go out alone, taking her Way d^ 
re<ftly to the great Church. I follow'd her with a 
great deal of Joy^ but at a diftance ; and feeing 
her enter the Church, redoubled my Pace, that f 
might overtake and not lofe fight of her. She only 
went crofs one of the Ifles, and fb out at another 
Door to fhorten her way to the Street of Pattens, 
whence (he went into Mercers Street, where? feeing 
me behind her, fhe made Signs to me to come up, 
which I did. There fhe told me with a Thoufand 
Sighs^ and almofi: Tears in her Eyes, how concerned 
fhe had been on my Account, becaufe of that curfed 
Brother of hers, of whom fhe related to me a 
World of Stories. This alarm'd fiiy Heart anew, 
and I now found my felf infinitely more in love 
with her than before. She exprefs'd her felf with 
all the Kindnefs and Tendernefs imaginable, and 
(aid. She would at the hazard of her Life venture 
that Night,to.make rae Amends, for the ill Reception 


Book II. of Guzman d^Alfarache. 39^ 

I had had before, if I were io pleased ; but, conti- 
nued Ihe^ there will be now no more liich Rifque to 
run, lince this mad Brother of mine will be going, in 
an Hour or two at fartheft, into the Country with- 
out fail, where he is to ftay Three or Four Days. 
I lik'd this well, and was glad to hear her talk at 
that Rate : for otherwife I would not have run the 
Hazard of palSng another Night under that filthy • 
Tub for never fb much. As Ihe was come into this 
Shop, which fhe would have me think fhe did only 
^ to have an Opportunity to confer with me, flie 
' thought her felf oblig'd to cheapen fomething or 
other, and fo fell to asking the Prices of feveral 
Trifles that belong to Women. After flie had pitch'd 
on fome, and agreed with the Man for ; y Francs for 
them, fhe bid him make them up and give them 
her, and fhe would fend her Waiting-woman with 
the Money. The Shopkeeper making fbme difficul- 
ty to let his Goods go fo, fince he dianot know her, 
I was prelcntly at hand to offer my Service, but fhe 
would not hear of it. At length, however, fhe ac- 
cepted my Proffer, on condition I would permit 
her to repay me at Night j or in cafe I would not, 
fhe faid me would leave the Goods. I told her foft- 
ly in her Ear, we fhould eafily agree about that 
when we came together. Thea fhe recommended 
to me not to provide any Supper, for that fhe would 
treat me in recompence of that fhe had receiv'd 
from me, and of which, by the by, I had fb fmall 
a Share. This Excefs of good Humour charm'd me 
exceedingly, infomuch, that I told her, fhe fhould 
be Miflrefs of every thing I had, as fhe was already 
of my Heart. Saying this, we parted, but not with- 
out uttering the mofl lancuifhing and tender Adieu i 
that could poffibly come from the fincerefl Affeftion, 
and promifing we would foon meet again to accom- 
plifh ineffable Delights. I returned home to wait for 
the lucky Hour, which I expedted with fiich Impa- 

Z a tience. 

340 'The Life and ASlions P^trt L 

tience, that I hardly knew how to contain my felf. 
The Time feem'd long, and I believ'd Night would 
never come. It came, neverthelefs, at length, and 
my Expedations were fo extraordinary, that I went 
along as gayly as if I were going to my Wedding, 
and never thought I fiiould get to my Joiirney^s end 
time enough. I came to the Door, and gave the 
Signal on which we had agreed, but no Anlwer was 
made. I fancied I was not heard, and therefore re- 
peated the Signal once, twice and thrice. It was 
all one, no Anfwer came: I could not imagine what 
this tould mean, unlefs tne Whimfical and Ill-con- 
dition d Devil of a Brother had chang'd his Mind, 
and come to fmell out the Defigns of his Sifter. A 
thoufand fliocking Notions came into my Head 9 yet, 
at laft, I thought I might be alarm'd too (bon, and 
therefore proceeded to give the Signal agaixx, but 
with greater .Force than before, that I mi^t be fure 
to be heard. But all was to no purpole ; J[ had deaf 
or worfe People to deal with, for none can be fo 
deaf as they that won :• hear. I went and came, 
turn d and return d' through and through the Street, 
but ftill faw no Light at the Window, 1 hearken d at 
the Door, but the Houfe was in profound Silence. 
Quite tir'd at length with tormenting and pla- 
guing my felf, I refo^jr'd to knock, thinking the worft 
that could happen would be, that the Brother iliould 
be within and come to the Door, and ask who was 
there, and what I wanted ; to which I could an- 
fwer, that I was miftaken in the Houfe, and there- 
fore negg'd his Pardon. I knock'd then in good 
earneft, but which I might do once, twice or thrice, 
to little or no purpofe, tor no Body heard me, or at 
lea ft would hear me. What can be the Meaning of 
all this^ faid I then within my fclf ? Is it that I 
muft be Bubble twice to this unkind Nymph ? And 
that this gentle Creature, who feem'd to me Kind- 
nefs and Courteiie^ it fclf, fhould. be one of thofe 


Book 11. of Cuzmzn d^AIfarache. 341 

cunning Ladicsj who make it their Bufinefs to en- 
fhare fuch young Coxcombs as I was ? Alals ! but 
that cannot be^ quoth I, and therefore 'twere beft 
for me to wait, that I may fee the End of all thefe 
Delays, which are, neverthelefs, oftentimes fervice- 
able to Lovers, and raife their Enjoyments to a more 
exalted Pitch. With thefe little Reafonings I pafs'd 
my Time fadly enough, till fuch time as it began to 
be Twelve a Clock at Night, renewing ever now 
and then my Signal, and lometimes knocking as if I 
would beat the Door down. Whilfl I was thus ftand- 
ing, like a Fool, in expedation of what would never 
happen, I heard a Noife, and foon after faw a Com- 
pany of People coming along with Lanthorns, and 
a young Gentleman at the Head of them. They 
peep'd upon one Houfe and t'other, and at length 
came to this where they ftop*d. I had through Pre- 
caution retir'd to a corner of the Street, where I 
ftood, expeding what would happen. They a^ 
came up in a Body, and began to thunder at tho 
Poor with great Vehemence ^ but feeing no Body 
came, they redoubled their Strokes with great Vi- 
gour. I was curious to know what would be the End 
of this Comedy^ and fancied they were miftaken in 
the Houfe ; but as they began to thump with their 
huge Staves with greater Fury than ever, all the 
Neighbourhood became at length awak'd by it. Then 
a Servant came to the Window, and ask'd what 
they would have, to Knock and Bounce after that 
rate. She was anlWer*d, It was the Jufiice wanted 
to come in, and fhe muft open to them immediately, 
I (aw then it was the Jufike indeed, and, to fay 
Truth, was about to have fcamper'd two or three 
tiraes,not knowing but it was for me that they look'd.' 
However, recovering my Courage, I refolv'd to 
Hand ftill, fince I were in a Place of Security j for 
I knew, if the worft came to the worft, I could take 
to my Heels and run for't. I was pleas'd the Night 

Z 3 was 

342 The Life and AHkm Vsxth 

was dark^ and they could not eafity overtake me ; 
therefore I determined to fee the end of this Farce^ 
that I might take my Meafures better another time. 
The Door was at length open'd^ and it was indeed 
my Miftrefles Houie that they aim'd at^ for they en- 
tered all together. That comforted me a little^ and 
gave me hopes 'twas not my Back the Laih was de- 
lign'd for. The Neighbours^ who hfid for fome time 
look'd out at their Windows upon hearing this Noi&^ 
were now come down into the Street^ to fee what 
th^ could learn concerning the Occafion of it. I 
obferv'd them talking together^ and being at fo great a 
Diftance that I could not well underftand what they 
iaid^ I came hearer. It was then I heard this choice 
Brother and Sifter were two honeft People of Cw- 
douay who having been whipp'd out of Madrid^ had 
for fome time drove this" Trdde of Kidnapping at 
Toledo : That they had entrap'd feveral befides me ; 
and among the reft^ a young Scrivener^ newly mar- 
ried^ from whom they nad had divers good Lumps^ 
and who was the Perlbn had play'd them this Trick, 
they having cheated him of at leaft Ten thoidiand 
Francs. The hearing of this Story, was like the ta- 
king off a Stone of a Thoufana weight from my 
Breaft, for now my Blood began to circulate again, 
which had run but heavily before. Nothing could 
have happened worfe to me, than to have been taken 
by the jafiice in this Houfe ; and I could not but 
give unfeigned Thanks to Heaven for delivering me 
from fo imminent a Danger. I now valu'd no lon- 
;er the Charges I had been at for the other Night's 
iupper, nor the ; y Francs I paid down for that Ba- 
I thought my felf fufficiently reveng'd when 
Taw them both led out bound to Prifon, tho' my 
Heart began to relent at the fight of the Woman, 
whom I had a fort of Kindnefs for, tho' Ihe fo little 
defery'd it. This Farce being at an end, I went home 
fad and melancholy, tho' I had all the Reafon in 
"" ■ ' ^ ■' - thp 

I law 

3ookII. (e/ Gtizman d^AIfarache. .343 

the World to rejoyce that I had efcap'd Co great a 
Hazard. I went to Bed, but could not fleep for 
thinking of my pail Adventure. I was up betimes 
next Mornings in hopes the Lady of Quality would 
jcomej as in truth the feem'd in all Reibeds^ and 
make me Amends for what I h^d fuiFer'd ^ but after I 
,had waited a confiderable while^ I had realbn to be- 
lieve I was made a Bubble of^ as well by this Woman 
as the other. I might ocpeA her long enough^ for 
neither fhe nor h^r Servant intended to appear ; and 
£0 1 gave over the 40 Bancs for loft^ as well as the 2 f. 
Thus you fee what became of my Amours^ whicn I 
had promised my felf fo much Pleafure from. To fi- 
nifh my Aifli<%ion^ when I came to go to Supper at 
^ight^ I found a Ttf-Staff at my Lodgii^s^ who I 
heard came from Madrid^ and was enquiring of my 
Hoft after a certain Stranger who came lately to 
Toledoy and whom without doubt he was looking af- 
ter forjio Good. This I did by no means like^ and^ 
to fay truths it gave me,a great deal of Uneafine^ 
but I feem'd to take no Notice of it ; and having 
confider'd a while on the Matter^ perceiving the T$f- 
Staff to go forth, I went and ask'd my Hoft what I 
had to pay j and having difcharg d his Reckoning, 
and caus'd my Boy to pack up my Goods in my 
Portmanteau, I went immediately to lodge at ano- 
ther Inn. Calling for Supper, like one that was new- 
ly arrived at that City, I was no fooner (et down, 
but this confounded 7af/>-5//ijf appeared there like wife, 
I thought this muft needs be for my Sins, yet I kept 
the beft Countenance I could ^ but the Fear and 
Concern I was under hinder'd me from eating a Bit : 
I imagined, however, it could not be for me that he 
look'd, fmce he would have feis'd me when he faw 
me firft, if it had been fo. This Thought comforted 
me a little, yet not eno^gh to make me fleep much 
better than I had done the two foregoing Nights ; 
fpx it was no iboner Day than I got up,to go and fee 

Z 4 what 

344 ^^^ ^/^ ''^ ASlio9s Part t 

what was to be done in this Exigency. I had not 
gone far^ before I heard one cry^ Two return d Mules 
for Almagro ; which prefently brought into my Mind 
what courfe I were beft to take. I agreed with the 
Crier upon the Price ; and being glad of this favoa^ 
rable Occafion to quit Xoleioy where eyety Thingj 
feem'd to fordtell Misfortunes to me^and nothing iUcs- 
ceeded with me, 1 fent my Boy for my Cloaths, and 
to pay off my laft Ldndlord, . intending to be gon6 
forthwith. The Truth is, I were by no means ealy 
till I had got upoft my Mule, 'and were gone A good 
way out of the City. We lay that Night at Orgar^ 
and the Ni^ht following at Malmn, ; but I were io 
overcome with Sleep on my firft Day's Journey, that 
1 were ready to drop off my Mule Twenty • times 
before I got t0 my Inn. That Night, Love pur- 
fuing me wherefbever I went, I had a fort of Ad- 
venture that did not fucceed much better than thofe 
1 had already had. It was with a brisk,buxom,young; 
Wench of a Servant^ who ijeverthelefs feem'd rather 
b Gentlewoman by her good Mien and behaviour. 
She, foon after my Arrival^made me a Thoiifarid Ad- 
vances of Love and Kihdnefs, which gaVe me realbn 
to hope greater Favours from her. This good Will 
of hers augmented every Moment ; and as we grew 
. better acquainted^ Ihe at length told me. She coull 
jipt be fo hard-hearted as to let me lie alone: I took 
care on my Part to leave my Door half open, that 
Ibe might come in at what Hour fiie judg'd inoft 
co|ivenienc j and which Ihe might eafily ao, for I 
lay in a Ground-Room, that was very remote from 
any of the reft in the Houfe. As this iie w • Intrigue 
did not take tip fo ' much of my Thoughts as my 
others had done, I was no fooner laid on my Pillow 
but 1 fell heartily a flee^, when all of a fudden I 
Was wak'd by a certain Noife I heard in my Cham- 
ber, i did not doubt but it was the young WenchL 
&nd^ half a fleep iand half awak& as I wa^, I faiicied I 
: ..*-._ ' ^ -^, ^ . . ^ ' . • ^ • . heard 

Bookn. if Guzthah d^Alfatachc. §45 

heard the nilUng of a filk Gown. I caird foftly to 
know who was there^ and ask'd,' Is it you^ Martca ? 
No Body anfwering, I im^gin^d it muft be flie com- 
. ng flily to furprife me; when clipping my felf up- 
-on my Breech, and uttering the foftcft Things I 
could invetit, 1 grop'd to fee if I could feel and pull 
her td.hie. As my Hands were wandering about, 
they happen'd to light on fbmething that was ex- 
ceeding foft, which frightened me at firft, tho* it 
was nothing but. an AiTes Ear, who^ raifinghisHead 
at the fame time, gave me fuch a tQrribl^ Douft un- 
der the Chaps, that he ftruck out two of ttiy Teeth, 
and fiird my Mouth with Blood. This made me to 
haul out as loud as if I had been ftuck, which im- 
mediately brought my Hoft and Servant into my 
Chamber with a Light, who were not a little lur- 
pris'd to find an Afs, that had been drawn thither by 
the Scent of fbme Sacks of Oars plac'd there the Day 
before : But they were yet more amaz'd, when they 
law me in my Bed all pale and bloody, not being 
able to imagine how this^ Difafter happened. I fatis- 
fy'd them the beft I could, yet took Care not to tell 
them the Truth, that they might not laugh at me, 
as they were already but too much enclin'd to do. 
They quickly thunder'd the great Beaft of an Afs 
out of the Room, and left me to my Repofe ^ but, 
alafi ! I could not fleep, lying curfing ana fwearing 
at that treacherous Deity Love ^Imoft all Night, 
refolving never more to be caught by him, or mi(^ 
tohim^ ■' 

» « . 



^4<^ The Life ami AStioni Piautt. 


puzman tells the mensnng of a certdn Vr&mrh $ 
4Hd afterwards proceeds to Jbew bom be woo 
Med for a Soldier j jet rejn/dly the OkmwnJJkry. 
lie thence takgs occajum to refleS on the Aiufis 
of that and other Pofis ^ and at laft comes to 
fpeak^ of was^ of Money ^ and the Confequences 

of it. 

SOme time after I had made thele fine Refblucion^* 
I fell alleep^ and flept io fbundly^ that I did not 
wake till much later than I defign'd. My Eyes were 
no (boner open than I faw the cunning Gipfy of n 
Servant enter the Room^ who prelently began to 
make a Thousand Excuies^ or rath^r^ to tell me fb 
many Lies. I would have reveng'd my felf i^>on 
her^ and for that purpofe was going to make Friends 
with her when the curicd Intruder of an Hoft came 
in and (poil'd my Sporty telling me my Breakfaft was 
ready^ and the Mules likewue^ and that if I had a 
mind to ^et to Mslofm in any time^ I mufl be up and 
gone quickly. This made me think I ihould be un- 
lucky m whatever I undertook^ Tmce hardly any 
thing I attempted fucceeded. I breakfafted weil^ and 
thih mounted my Mule ; but before I got up^ the 
plaguy Beaft had like to have ruined me by^ a Kick 
he made at me^ yet which I avoided by being too 
near him^ for he only touch'd me with the upper 
part of his Leg. I look'd upon this as occalion'd by 
my unlucky Star, which never let me be fucceisfiil 
with any Females. I reveng'd my felf upon this skit- 
tiih Beaft, by gallopping him as long as I was able* 
As we rode along^ I diverted the Company with my 


BookIL 0/ C^zman d'Al^fftchc 347 

Adventure of the Ais, ' while I were waiting for Ma^ 
Yl0^ tho* the MuUteer laugh'd at me, and lo did the 
Afs-dnvcTy but the former with greater Reafbn, for 
'twas he was with my Miftrefs while I fo fuffer'd for 
the want of her. He told me, I was a Novice thai; 
did not know that fuch Morfels as the Servant-* 
Maids were for fuch as he, that brought moft profit 
to the Houfe, and not for fuch Chance-PalTengers 
asL That it was they were alwaysbeft treated at others 
Expence, and that the Hoft would be fure to con- 
tent them, that they might continue to bring Guefts 
to his Houfe, without which he could not live. We 
got to Malagm by Night, and no other Misfortune 
befel me for the preient, except the Lofs of a Bottle 
of excellent Wine which (bmebody had ftolen from 
me, and which made me think of the Proverb, Ma^ 
lagon^ en cada Cafa ajf un Ladron] fen la del jllcalde, 
Bjoy Padre; which m Englijh is, Malapn has a HUf 
in every Hotife^ and in that of tie jUeaUk there are two^ 
the Father and Son. I took occafion from hence, to ask 
the merry-conceited Muleteer what was the Meaning 
of this Proverb, believing he could ^tisfy me, be- 
caufe he had fo often pals'd and repa&'d that Way, 
He acquainted me, there were many stories told con- 
cerning it, but what (eem'd to him moft juft and rea* 
fonable, was this. In the Year 1236, when Don Fer^ 
dinand, Surnam'd the Hofy^ was King of Caftile and 
lemy that Prince being one Day at Beneventmn at 
Dinner, News was brought him that the Cbrifiiam 
had entered Qordma^ whioi was then in the Hands of 
the Moors^ and h^ already pofieis'd themfelves of 
the Bulwarks and Towers of the Suburbs, call'd 
even to this Day Jxarauia^ but that they were in 
danger of being every Moment driven out again by 
the Moors, who were far more numerous, if they 
Were not fpeedily fuccour'd. Don Ferdinand^ anima-* 
ted by his Zeal for Religion, and the very Name of 
3 ChrifUan, did not long confidec what Courle ho 


348 The Life and Miohs * Fart h 

was bcft to take, but even with thofe few Troops that 
were witb him, took a Refolution to fet out in three 
Days towards the Relief of thofe brave Chriftians, 
left they might otherwife fuffer for want of being 
affifted, and lofe that great Advantage they had got. 
Don Alvaro Terex, de Ca^roy and Don Ordonio Al^arez^^ 
who both were at Marts^ havine notice of what had 
pals'd at CwrJoMy went and offer d their Services to 
the King, carrying with them many other Valiant 
and I^oble Cavaliers. Thele two Lords were at 
that time the greateft at the Cafiilian Court. The 
King, greatly rejoic'd at their coming, fet out as he 
had determin d, tho* it was in the depth of Winter, 
being the jift of January ^ for he had not heard this 
News till the 28th. His Majefty's Army made to- 
gether not above aoo Men that were fit to fight, but 
ne fent to his Vaffals to join him every where^ and 
ordered all fuch of his Troops as were in any Towns, 
Cities or Villages, to defile towards Cordoua. All 
thefe Orders were difpers'd with great Diligence, 
and they might have been accordingly executed ; but 
there happened to fall fo much Snow, and fo great 
Rains, that the Rivers and Springs over- flowing every 
where, it was impoffible for any Troops to pals, fo 
that not being able to move any farther, they .were 
obliged to ftay where they were. There were fbmc 
cf thefe Troops that quartered in Mahgon, which was 
at that time a confiderable Town, and had a good 
Country for Forage round it. Every Houfe had a 
Soldier in it, and ibme of the Principal Burghers 
had two. Among thefe was reckon'd the AtcatiiSy 
whOj in con}un<5kion with his Son, had the Command 
of thefe Troops. As it was a very hard Winter, Pro- 
yifions, confidering the Numbers that were in that 
Town, became exceeding fcarce, infomuch that 2tt 
length there was a kind of Famine. This lafting 
longer than the Soldiers expeded, they wanting 
Money to buy NecefTaries, which were at exceffivc 


Book IL of Guzman d'Alfarache. 94^ 

Rates^ began to rob and fteal^ to prevent their dying 
with Hunger. A Peafant happening to pais thro* 
their Hands^ and going afterwards to Orgaz^y met a 
Friend of his upon the Road, who asking him what 
!News zt.MalagMy from whence he knew he came^ he 
made him the aforefaid Anfwer, which afterwards 
beqime a Proverb. Now, proceeded the Mtdtteer^ 
it IS mioft unjuft that this Proverb Ihould be applied 
to the Inhabitants of Malagm^ fince they were the 
Perfons robb'd, and notthofc that cbbVd others. On 
the contrary, to make them Amendil it.may well be 
laid and maintained, that this is the r lace, through- 
out all the Road from Madrid to Sevili where Paiien- 
gers are the beft entertained, and at the moft re^fb* 
nable Rates. Not that I will fay tl>ere are no Vil- 
lames committed here, for every Country has its 
Rogues, and fb no doubt has this, 

Whilft we were difcourfing in this manner to di- 
vert our lelves, an Acquaintance of our Muleuers, 
who was juft cpme from Almagroy caifte to us, anci 
told us there was a Company of Soldiers, newly 
rais'd, who were juft upon their March for the Midi^ 
terranean Sea, where he believ'd they would embark. 
This News pleas'd me exceedingly, infomuch that 
I began to fancy, that Fortune, tho' flie had bandy 'd 
me about from Place to Place, and from one Misfor- 
tune to another, would at length lead me, as it were 
by the Hand, to my defired Port, for nothing could 
have happened more pat to my Purpofe than the go- 
ing of this Company, which was all I had for a long 
time fought after. This comforted me. in an Inftanc 
for all my paft Follies and Misfortunes. I had no 
Reafon to doubt of this News as foon as ever I came 
to Almagroy for I happen'd to pafs by the very Door 
where the Captain of this Company lodgd, and 
whole Colours hung out ac the Window. The Mu- 
lct etr[(:>2ixx\^ me to a Lodging hard by, and' that 
Night 1 had nothing to do but to reft my felf. Next 


)$d The Lift dnJ ABiom Putt L 

Mornit^ having drels'd my ielf handfbmly^ I went 
to hear Mafs^ and meeting the Captain there^ fk- 
hited him^ and told him^ 1 was juft come to Mmagro 
to have the Ifonoor to lenre the King under his Com- 
loaxKL • He leeini; me lb well equipp'd^ and with a 
Senrant that look'd alio well^ took me for a young 
Peribn of Qiality^ and accorcHngly receir'dme with 
all poffible jHkmours and Relpetty which he knew 
well how to pay^ being a Cavalier of extraordinary 
Breeding. He teftified to me at firft^ the Joy he had 
at my Arrival, and that I was diipos'd to honour his 
Omipany wim my Perfon^ acquainting me^ that tfao' 
all his commifGon-Officers were fix'd^ yet I mig^t 
always Ihare with him in that of Captain. So great 
CiviUties from a Perfon, to whom I was altogether 
imkxKiwn, charm'd me exceediligly^ and made me 
conceive a Pleafure in the Employment I was going 
to embark in^ which I had never dreamt of. He 
f4>Iig*d me from that Day forward to dine with him 
every Day, and having enquir d of my Servant who 
I was^ he found he was not miftaken, for he had told 
him fny Name was Don Juan de Guzman^ of the Fa- 
inily of Toraly which was the Name and Qiiality I 
hadfaifum'dat 7^/e<&^ and that was all my servant 
knew of me. The Captain treated me extreamly 
well, and very heartily, and after Dinner lifted me 
of the Company in the ufual Form. The next Day 
I would needs treat my Captain at Dinner, and I ac- 
quitted my felf as fought, but it did not a little lighten 
my Purfe. All this however was nothing, and I 
might have done well enough if I had ftop'd here ,• 
but I muft game, forfooth, as great People are wont 
to do, and that with Officers who knew better what 
belonged to it than my felf. In a Word, I generally 
loft, and how I wonder fhould I do otherwife, 
when I knew little or nothing of the Matter. I 
were always verjr good at Refleftions. when there 
was no occafion for them, but in Cafe of Ncceffitv^ 

* the 

» « 

Boot: n. <f (^uzmafi )f Ali&racbe: ^s i 

the Impetuofity of my Humour ever got the Vidory 
over my weak Reaioning. I thought as long as I 
tvas a Soldier, and the Captain's Favourite^ I could 
xvant for nothing. I fancied, the Company did not 
look upon me as a Fellow-Soldier, but as their Cap- 
tain-Lioutenant ; I made ray Captain Prefents from 
time to time to fecure his Favour^ and would ofcea. 
treat both him and his Officers at an exceflive Ex-> 
pence. By thefe means, my Purfe, having no Flux 
and Reflux like the Sea, l)egan to diminim exceed^ 
ingly, and fo continued to do, I being in no Way^ 
but this laft poor One, of getting a Penny. At 
length the Mufter came on, and the Soldiers being 
to go in at one Door of a Church, and out at ano* 
ther^ in order to be examined, when it came to my 
Turn the Commiflkry would not pals me, becaufe I 
was too young. ' I might be angiy if I pleased, ancf 
fiorm as much as I would, and the Captain might 
talk as big as he thoi^ht At, for the Commiifary wa^ 
refolv'd to pedift in his Refolutioa All the Realbit 
he would give, was, that he had Orders and lur 
ftniftions to that purpofe j but I wifli he would have 
always kept to thole Orders and Inftru^ions. Some- 
times Fm iiire he mov*d excentricalljr, and follow'd^ 
the Biafs of a Self-interefted Inclination. But I had 
no Remedy but Patience in this Cafe, tno* my Con- 
cern and Confiifion appeared fufficiently in my Face, 
I vi^ent home, and the Captain was to kind as to 
come and fee me, and comfort me, telling me, I fliould 
go along with him to Italy for all this j where we 
ihould be no fooner landed, but he wpuld makeufe of 
his Friends to procure me a Colours. I thanked him 
heartily as became me, and having experienc'd fo 
many Civilities and good Offices from this generous 
Commander, I could not think my felf leis happy, 
fince I was lb much in his good Graces, than if I 
had obtain d this noble Employment of a Foot-Sol- 
dier, i have a good mind to difcourfc here of th(5 


• • 

35* . Tke Life akJ jmoni . P^rtt 

ill Ufage of brave Fellows that have engajg'd them- 
lelves betimes in the Army^ and always fought va- 
liantly for the good of their Country. When they 
have done all^ I fay^ they muft at lad be fubje<%ed 
to the Caprices of thefc Commiflaries^ or foipe fuch- 
Hke Upftarts, whom they left Footmen, or .at teft 
Vakf de CbambreSy when they went to taike leave of 
tlie Prime Minifter, or other Great Man^ to go into 
the Field. Yet fliall it be at the Pleafure of theie 
Wretches, who know nothing of the Matter, tho* 
they pretend to know fo much, to fnub and controul 
thefe old Officers and Soldiers, becaufe they have 
not Hearts bafe enough to make court to fuch vile 
Earth-Worms, whofe Knowledge extends- no farther 
than to filling their Purfcs, and wroncing the moft 
delerving Men. When I confider d all this, I thought, 
the Perion that pfefer'd. them to thefe Pofts of Au- 
thority could never have rightly inform'd hitnfeli^ 
either of their Abilities or integrity, but niufl have 
fufFe?d himfelf to be entirely .glided by Intereft and 
Favour when he exalted fuch worthlefs Creatures. 
Thus I was tempted to think all was corrupted, even 
from the Prime Minifter to thet meaneft Commiflkry. 
And what fliould be the meaning of all this, but 
that every Body minds his own particular Intereft 
whilft he negleds that of die Publick, and w^hicfa is 
the common Source of moft Mifcarriages and M^le- 
Adminiftrations, It often happens, that as there are 
more Minifters than one that have their different 
Provinces affign'd them, he that afts in one in iqm^ 
particular Cafe, Ihall have for Enemies all the reft, 
who, perhaps, have nothing to do ; and this becaufe 
they can t endure that he alone (bould be talk'd of, 
and engrofs the Favour of the Prince. What will 
they do then to right themfelves ? Why, thev will 
endeavour to ruin him that has acquitted himfelf fo 
well of his Duty, and been the Caufe of all their 
Difcpntenu • They will fpread falfe Jleports ^^pncern^ 

»7# • 

kU. 0/ Guztnah d'AIfarache. 35^ 

iag him anipneft the People^ and do cheir beft to 
render^' liiia omous both to them and his Prince^ of 
whom, nererth^lefi, he his fb well defenr'd. They 
will ipeak no 111 of him themfelves, but rather all the 
Good they can, and difown any Malice againft hihi 
whenever they are charg'd with it j yet which they 
do with fo dubious an Air, as ferves fooner to make 
them diicredited than betievU At the iame time^ : 
tho' they will not fliew themfekes openly, they (hall 
employ thetr little Emiflaries and Creatures to ao him 
all the ill Offices they can, both with Princeand 
People. They will, m a Wotd, lay a thoufand 
Snakes for him, and do all that in chem lies ro make 
his Deftgns mKc^ry, altho' they be nothing but 
what tend.purely to the Service <rf their Prince and 
Cotthtry,' bift which they feldom or never trouble 
their Iteads about. If there be any of thefe Mini* 
fters that lords it over the reft^ either thro' the Irt« 
tereft he has got in his Mafter, or the Authority he 
has acquired infendbly in alt manner of Affairs, whac 
Inconvjenieticiesdo not arife from thence, what Abufes, 
yirhat Diforders! What Ihall not this Favourite-Mi- 
^dfter do to iubjed his Brethren to his Power, and 
ikiake them acknowledge, that both their good or ill . 

'Fortune abfblutely depends « on his Pleafure! What ^ 
fiiall there pafs in the World that he will not have a 
Share in ? It is he that declares War, and that often* 
nmes purely to gratify his private Interefi, that he 
jnay have an Opportunity to advance his Creatures, 
crowd his CoflPers, or deftroy fbme Perfons he bears 
lU-will to, by expofing them to fome dangerous 
Poft. It is tl\us, for the moft part, a Prince is icrv'dj 
and his poor. SiibjeAs abus'd. It is thus, I fay, the 
publickTreafure is mifemploy'd, and the Sute ruin'd, 
by unaeceffary Expences. You fiull have' whole 
Armies rais'd to do nothing but devour the publick 
Provifions,' which, perhaps, the People have more 
occafioA. ior^ thro! J:he great Scarcity introducVI 

Aa ^ among 

354 The Life and Miom Tartt^ 

among them by immoderate Taxes. A 
other Misfortunes there are that accnie to a 
try by bad Minifters. Thus the AflFairs of the 
World for the moft part go^ and he moft be more 
than ordinary skilful that knows hovr to remedy 
them. This is alfo what makes a great many 
brave Spirits lofe their Courage^ w}k> not being 
willing to owe their Fortune to any thing but their 
Virtue or their Merit, find themielves oftentimes 
flighted and contemn'd, becaufe they have not ta- 
ken the ready way ta Preferment, by flattering and 
bribing thefe Prime Minifters. The Sfanlaris. who 
above all JPeople are the unfitted for thefe lore of 
ftrvile Complaifances^ think they purchaie this Fa- 
itour very dear when they die of tneir Wounds, in- 
£)much that, being difguHed againft the Trade of 
War, they are no longer what they have been for- 
merly. Li former Times their Name alone fought 
and conquered ; they made the whole Earth tremble, 
of which they were almoft the Mafters. Now it is 
no more the fame Thing j they are ^o fallen from 
their former Condition, that now they are more 
jfeady to tremble themfelves, than make othets do 
lb, as feeing their Empire like to fall to Pieces every 
Moment. . Neverthelels> in the main^ they are ftill 
what they* ever have been^ that is^ bold, couragious 
and reicmite, as any People in the World. Aiay 
Heaven pleafe to reform thofe Perfons that have the 
cogniiance of thefe Maters, and all will go well. 
I have but too many Examples of the Mifohtefs that 
erife to a State from the too great Favour of certain 
People^ who are nevertheiels generally hated. Ha- 
n-ed produces Envy, Envy I)iiifention> and Difien* 
tion a general Difor der in all Things. But Tl lay no 
nK)re on this Head for the prefent. defign^ng to re- 
fume, it again hereafter as I fhall fina occafioob 
: . ixeturo now to my Captain^ who afeer having 
ioazfed nte with Civilities zm Pxofeflxons^of Fiiend- 
♦^••••^•- ^hip> 




fliip, left me, in order tor go home to his Houfe. t 
would ftin have waited on him, but he would by no 
means fuffer ifte. The Conipainy march'd tWo or' 
three Daiys after, and I along with them, in quality 
of a Volunteer. We made no ftop till we got to the 
Sea-fide, where we had Orders to embark j but wo 
muft nevertheleft ftay for the GalHes that were to 
tranfport U93 which were, not yet arriVd, and WhicK 
did not come in le& than three Months after, fb well 
the Order? had been obferVd. In the mean tlm6 th* 
Captain ftiM prefertr'd his firit Kindnefe for me, but 
the Honour ne did nie, tho' it pufc u() my Hearty 
inade my I>urfe to groW lank, iillbmuch, that cohr 
tinuing to lead the Life I had fonherljr lcd[, I foon' 
found my felf not able to fupport it toy lon^^r. My 
Conditlcm grew worfe and Worfe etery Day, awd at 
length I became fo reduc'd. that I durft not appear^ 
any more. Having no Money to g«me, to what 
purpofe, thought ^ fliould I come abroad ; . th^e*' 
tore I ctonfirfd my felf to my Cell, and liv'd as fpS- 
ringly as I dould upon thSt tittU I had left. I hacf 
already parted with my Servant, who began to be 
an Encumbrance to me. This indeed gave but an ilf 
Opinion of my Circumftatnces, and Timetocomtf 
altogether confirm'd k. Refleftions now cgime fhicK 
upon me when there was no Remedy. As long a^ 
my Money lafted Inever gate way to them, biit a* 
foon as it was gone I entertained them tery freely. 
I was confcious of the Follies I had committed, ardi 
blam'd only my felt Then came RejM^caches upon 
Reproadhes, but to little purpofe fince the Timfe, 
was paft. I reiblv^d to manage my Money $ettef 
ivhen I got any more, but, alafs ! it w^s uncertainf 
''hen I (hould have any more to manage. I ha J 
bus'd my good Fortune, and might wait longc- 
^ough before I had any fuch again. ' I was now len* 
ble, I haH run into Extravagancies I might irery 
ell have efcapU Fine Cloaths, a FQOt-iBoy> a;n4l 

As a ihe 

55^ The Life knd ARitml ^ VMV 

the like^ were not only in^radeot^. but unprofitable 
Expences to me j and fince I. had kftown this Cap- 
tain^ I had confum-d a good deal in Treats and Pre- 
fents i but to what purpofe ?' Now my Money was 
gpne^ perhaps he woula regard me no longer^ and 
Ip in effed I found ir^ for tie did not invite me to 
Dinner^ as ufual^ now^ when I had moft o<:caf]on for 
it. 'Tis thus young Fellows^ fych as I, pay de«r for 
their Pleafures. 1 was almoft ready to run rbad 
when I refleded upon my Extravagandes. I founds 
that as good a Reputation as I had gpt in the Com- 
pany whUe my Money lafted^ I (houS not fail to (oie 
It now it was gone. My Friends I had procur'd by 
this mean$, began now to forfake and flight me; 
Their Friendfliip grew cold as my Stock Teflen'd^ 
and now I was reacfy to borrow of uiole whom I had 
forpierly lent generoufly. They would lend me in- 
deed for once^ but when I came again^ I met with 
nothing but pitiful Excufes. Not a Man would look 
on me twice ; nay^ even fome that had been more 
than ordinarily oblig'd to me. Thefe frighted the 
reft, and, in a Word, . every Body avoided me. One 
would have thought I had had the Plague, for Icarce 
any Body, would come near me. Neceflity, indeed, 
is Plague enough, and fufficient to make every Body 
fly one. Even Bailiffs would not keep me Company 
now, tho' they formerly came Cap in Hand to be 
employed by me. The Black-guard only fluck by 
me, who would willingly have had me or their Fra- 
tenMty, if I could have taken up with fo vile k Pro- 
feifion. Thus, by a jufl judgment, I was punifh'd 
as 1 deferv'd^ and reduc'd to my former Conolcion. 


. B^ IL 4/ Cvizmti jcPAirsHrache. ^9^7 

, • . . . • 

- ■ ■ * 

,e H A P- X 

XSuzman j?^/ )&/t^ tke Blfadvantnges of one fhft 
k decay d in his Fortum^ and haw dsmctdt it k 
far an homft Mm to get into any Entploymet^. 
He acqnaints yon^ how be fafplied hk Captains 
Necejfnies ty hk Rffgneries j and afterwardf^ 
how he came with him to Geaoa, white he dip- 
chared tnm^ notwithlianding hk former Service f^ 
meerty becaufi of the Dangers be expo/ 4 hif^ 

ON E Thing, however, comforted me in this de- 
plorable and comfortlefs Condition, and that 
was, that during all my good Days I hadlir'd (o, 
that no Body could have an ill Opinion of me, nqp 
believe me capa1)le of an ill A<SKon, for I had nevej 
/been feen to do any thing but what was hbhohrable 
and honeft. This terv'd me in great ftead, efpedally 
with my Captain, who ftill retained fome Kmdnefe 
for me, tho' he did not invite me fo often as' he us'^ 
to do to Dinner. His Fortune was not mijch bettet 
than mine, for being likewife reduced by uriv^ary 
Living, he was for'd to live by his Wits ; therefore 
I could not but be a little burdenfbn^e tQ him. If he 
had known my Talent for affifting him^ h^^ pei<j|aps^ 
would have lik'd me better. 1 went often to fee him 
cut of Civility, and he always 'received me yer^ 
kindly, never making the leaft* Reflexion upon m^ 
Condition. I appearM n6thinl|^ pea jr fb pida&nt S 
I us'd to be, nw carried my lelf fo haughtw;asri 
had forr&crly done, but which Was rather Al&a^oH 
than my ^atitfal-T-empftr. Ihad, f6r Ji' !?%• fidibl 

A a 5 known 

I$8 ' The tiff and ARim Parti 

known what it was to have Nothings thercfoip that 
was not capable of making any Alteration in me. 
But I believ'd it was becoming fuch a Man as I would 
be thought to be^ to fecm fenfibly touch'd with his 
Condition^ and would have People ittiagine I con< 
peard my Affliftion with greater Arttnoe than I 
teally did^ whicH I fiinciea would m^ke nie more 
cfteenj'd. It becomes no Body to be too proud or' 
foppiili^ but l^p^ fiire 9 Perfbn under Circumftances^ 
khan another^ who is in no fear of Want. The for- 
mer is like a C^melioiii that nev^ fallows an 
thing Wt Airj aad the latter fiiews him&i£ no lei 
H Sot by his fooUCh Behaviouri tho' h? has where- 
withal! to fill his Belly fubftaotially. Modeftyat 
this ^me had taken up its Quarters with me^ and^ 
in truths it fate eafily upon i^e. My Captain^ who 
believ'd I fufier'd exceedingly^ admir'd ine greatly^ 
dnd eo^ld not forbear at len^h giving me to on- 
derft^d^ how much he was iconcerh'd that it was not 
\n his Power to fupply my WahtsV at that Jutidure 
efpeciifdly/' He pWn a he had received 9 gteat many 
Ci^mei from h^e^ 9nd would have been gU(l of 
pat Qccafion of making me fome Ketqfo^ ; but in 
Regard he -was utterly ^^incapacitated, he l^op'd I 
would not take it amiis if he offered me tq come 
and e^t and lodge with hjs Seirvai^ts^ for^ as toiiim- 
felf^ he was oblig'd^to retrench his ow« Table^ and 
jgeta Dinner where he could, lie profict'd this 
with fome ibrt of Conliifion^ not being able to cjlo 
more for* me: bqt as he tehder d it \xi fuch an obliging 
mam^er^ anq with all the ieeming fince4ty and mo- 
iefiy in the ^orld;» I could qot refuife tp accept of 
tt| and ip from h]§ Companion Ibecaix^ ilttlele^ than 
tus Menial Servant; yet wai inhere £>mel>sfei^ehce paid 
me % M^ O^erj ^\ io reality, I fer'd no'feetter 
|V ^4ft* ^ I d^ Mn9 wM: Serv^oe i v^as abl^ be*. 
* /I V^f^ n^t bat |i^ Bread forocMiing, and that I 
toigftt % bea» 0^^ 4[ thought; 

Book n. ff Guznian d^Alfarache. 35^ 

however^ this would kit no longer than tilll got to 
Genoa^ for there I hop'd for Recruits, yet ftifl it 
was an Advantage that I could get thither in (pice 
of my ill Fortune, or rather my ill Condud. 

As I was cvenr Day for doing every thing that 
^^ht eain his AffeAion more and more, he put fb 
great 0>nfidence in me, that believing me to be dis- 
creet, rfio* I was really not fo, in regard to my felf 
cfpecially, he refblv'd to acquaint me with his Anairs, 
which incleed were fuch, that he knew not where to 
lay his Head. He own'd to me, that he had not a 
Penny of Money, and that all his Hopes lay in a few 
Stones and Jewels that he had ftill remaining^ which, 
neverthelels, were not fufficient to pay off half he 
ow*d. He told me, what had reduced him to this Ex- 
tremity was, the long Delays he had met with in 
"jetting his Employment, and the great Prefcnts he 
lad made to Perfons in Pow6r, tho , one would have 
thought, bis Merit of Twenty Years Service might 
have been fufficient to have obtained it. He faid, it 
was impoffible to guefs what Charges he had been at 
in his ieveral Solicitations, and how many . mean 
Things he was obliged to do, nay, cringe to the 
vileft Servants, before he could have the leaft Hopes. 
He acquainted ttie, how he was forc'd to run about 
from this Perfon of Quality to that from Morning 
till Night, make Reverehces to this Valtt de Chatnhre^ 
tod that Gntrny and pay the profoundeft Refpe<9: tQ 
the Matter of them. He faid, he was oblig'd to fol-' 
low him, wait upon him forwards and backwards, 
always with his Ilat in his Hand, ^nd hi^ Legs ready^ 
to run wherever hefliould command him. Whenever 
he but iaw him thro^ i Window, he muft be ready 
with a profound Bow i and if he but fpy'd him croft; 
a Court, or had' but the Happinels. to be ask'd by" 
him what 'twas a Clock, he muft believe there coulcf 
be nothing more fortunate to him. In a Word, this 
Captain g^ye me fo lively, but fo lamentable, a Cha- 

A a 4 r^i^ef 

9^0 The life and A^o^s P^rtL 

ra&er of thcfe Miuifters^ that nothing coulcjl be 
more touching. He added to it^ a finall Ax:cickat that 
had like to have been his Rain. He fai4 the Night 
before he was (o have had his CommiQIon^ after h^ 
had dapc'd Attendance 8 or 9 M onths^ going to 
wait on thb Minifter to his €>>ach as he came out 
of the Court, and happening to clap his Hat on but 
a Moment before the Coach went away^ this haughty 
Grandee was to oiFended at it, that he made him ftay 
for his Difpatch above 4 Months longer, and he was 
'like to have gone without it at 1^^ had he not made 
good Friends. 

God deliverraefrom luch an Union as that of Power 
and bad Conditions \ 'Tis a miferable Part theie Idols of 
the Court aA, demanding a ^rt of Adoration while 
they are Men as well as we, and, perhaps, worie 
Men than we are. Deprive them bur of tneir Em- 
ploys, and youl find, that, like Comedians^ they 
are nothing lefi than what they appear to bk Re- 
member Mr. Prime Minifter, tho' you'hdI4 your 
Head^ high now, a Grave waits for yoo as well as 
it does for me, and, perhslps, you may fooner oome 
to Duft than my Worlhip. ' The (Comedy of the 
WorhjL is already regulated, a new one wiU not be 
made for you. pJothiijig here-is eternal^ every Thing 
muQ: pais away, and your Honour as well as the refE 
>yhat a piry 'ris that tbele great Lords fhould knov 
themfclves fo little ; that they ihould think their 
Bellies are large enough to coiltam all the Water in 
the Sea ! htt them feed upon their Greatneis as if it 
>y ere. always to laftj and let them carry themfelves 
proudly^ as if Death had forgot them* ^ God be 
|>rai$ d that there is a God^ and be his. Mercy for 
ever bleiTed, in that he, h^Si. oeex^. pleas'd to appoint 
kimfelf a Day wherein heJ^^illji^ge all the world 
fccording^ to their .Works. - '/, ' ^ :-'•.. 

^f »• 


» * 

Book H of Gxaxfm iti'AKardche. 3^1 

I was3 -In truths more touch'd with thi^ lamentable 
Relation of my Captains^ than I could poffibly be 
with itiy own Misfortunes; but ftill his great Kind- 
ne^ for me^ upon this extraordinary Occafion^ movM 
me yet more. There was nothing but what I would 
have done for him^ to have dekrer'd him from Ms 
'Troubles. I gave 1^ to underftand as mnch^ in the 
n^ forcible manner I could expreis it^ and told him^ 
if my Life only were to be exposed in ferving him, 
I (hould notthinklventur'dtoomuch^ after the many 
Obligations I had received at his Hands. I acquain- 
ted him I was youngs and had not* ieen much of the 
World, vet Neceffity and fome Wit had fupply'd my 
Want ot Experience. I told him moreover, I would 
fee what I could do for him, but however he mig^t 
always depend on my Fidelity and good Intentions. 
He exprefs*d himfelf extreamly obli^d to me ^r the 
Zeal I ihew'd to ierve him; and having embrac'd m6 
heartily, told me, finiling, he did not doubt of my 
Sincenty, but could not imagiae what Service Tcduid 
do him in the Condition I was ia I replied. Good 
IVittes were not enough for me, and that if he 
would iiifier me to ad*, we would live well, at leaft, 
till better Times came. He fmil'd^ again, andiaid 
ixo more^; .but, as he knew me not, he quickly found 
I wa& able to do him more Service than he thought 
fori TTis true, I did Wonders to oblige him. The 
Gallics that were . to tranfport us with other Troops 
bein^ a long whiile a coming, we were quartered in 
ithe circumjacent Villages, and we changed our Quar^ 
ters. frequently. Th$t gave me occafion to make my 
&ft Advantage. 1 gave out a dozen of Billets upon 
every ^ Houfe, of \1rihich9 the leaft wais worth to m^ 
Five Francs y and ibme of the better fort Fifteen. Fo^ 
my own part, I lodg'd np where bat at Free-coft, 
and where I had my llaads at liberty. I would have 
i>een contented with Water out of the Well, rather 
fhaa goq? away empty. ' . ]^y Captain needed not «di 


9^2 7%e Ufe mid ASions Fart I 

go out of Doors for ffood Cheer^ nor be at any Ex- 
pence for't. I furnim*d him w^ every Tilings as 
w<XL Capons^ Pallets^ Geefe^ Pigeons^ and die ake^ 
as with ^ood Gammons of Bacon^ and other ex- 

giufite Diihes. I never kept ought for my (eli^ but 
icrific*d an to him^ fo true I was to him. If by 
dsance I were caught in the Faft^ and could not deny 
it, inodeit werea fhuU Thing I made a Jeil of it ana^ 
if a greater^ the worft could happen to me was to be 
carried bdbremy Captain; who would reprimand me 
feverely^ and fometimes confine me in a Chamber 
lor two cm: diree Days. If the Thdt was of any great 
Coniequence^ he was for'd to give me the Laih^ or, 
•t kaft^ pretend to do (b^ to fatisfy theComplainants^ 
Y^iea I would cry and roar out as if I had been flea'd^ 
fho*> in trudi^ he never tooch'd me. Other Puniih' 
mentf of the like Nature he pretended to ^ve me^ 
CO content die wrong'd Parties^ apd iave die Honour 
cf the Oflker. I had (bmetimes Friends that came 
CO intercede for me^ but my Captain always appeared 
inexorable^ ^ ftrift a Dilcipkne he feem'd to ob- 
ionne. When we were alcme^ we did nothing but 
Jaudi at theie Fools^ who fufFer'd then^Ives to be 
made fuch Babbles o£ From theie fmall Tlungs^ 
we at kft ventured upon greater^ which was^ to go 
en the Hig^way^ and fei& v4iatever Booty we 
could meet with, i had always^ five or fix lufty Fel- 
lows of our Company along with me^ who would 
not be baffled for a imali Matter. We were difguis'd^ 
and therefore could not be ea(i(y known. But at 
lengthy' our Captain thought this a dangerous Game, 
ana therefore forbid us to play any more at it. As 
for Falle-Mufters^ I had a Trick for that^ for by 
means of a different Peruke^ or by placinj^ a 
t>lack Patch, I would make the fanrie Soldier pals for 
i!everai, ancl fo brought fo many Men's Pay into my 
Capeain's Pocket. He quickly found what a Con- 
feniency he had in me^ and that I alone was worth 


Book IL (/ Guknan d'Alfarache. ^43 

more than his whole Compaxiy to him^ for in all his 
Mardi from Alm^gr^^ he had not got io much as by 
my iingle Induft^. Bi)t he was one who i|ient a 
^reat deal ; and let me get what I would^ at netr«r 
10 great Hazard and Care^ he laviih'd it away upcm 
^he firft Woman or Man he met that he lik'd. ^ 

The Callies being at length arriv'd at Barcelona^ we 
had Orders to embark upon the firft fair Wind. As 
thiii Wjas not a Country that could always find us with 
^p4 Cheer^ my Captain found himfelf ibon tr- 
gf[fmp4* He had no Pay remitted him^ as was tho 
and ancient Cuitom of Spain^ but muft wait 
le came to Italy for that. Bilk of E|:change 
He had no goodi Underftandii^ together^ yet he 
ae^ live' in the mean time^ but how^ he did not 
3M0iW. I ob|fery'd him to be.melancholy^ vex'd^ a^ 
lpx»i of humour, arid I was very forry to (ee it } Wt 
1$ { was a PhyHci^n that knew his Diftemper at fir ft 
»|ght^ I told him fov h\$ Comfort, thp' I had ne^er 
'frcen in this City before, and knew not the Plan of . 
^, yet he fhould fee I would do fomething in ir^ 
thro* Induftry, th?it fliould jedound to his Profit, 
He. told me,-:we hid »p more to do with Peafamsp 
jpnd I: muft take Care whut I didJ Now you muft 
Jcnow^ among thoie Stones and Jewels which I have 
acquainted you he had, there was a Oold Rilup$ary^ 
or .Cafe for Reliquea, all fet round with fniaU Diii- 
mpnds. It was very fine, and well made, and he dfr^ 
fipi^ to difpofe or it for Subfiftence till fjoxix time. 
US he embark'd. I deiir'd him to fhew it n^e^^ fnd 
fsk'd him, if he could have fb much Confid^noe ia 
me^ as to let me ha?e it for two or three Days, ^nd \ 
wQuld reitore it to him ^g^hi with Intereft. He smI'- 
Ivi^r'd, afl^ he had entruftedme wich his Reputation^ 
he £Ould toot refufe me fucha Thing;tho'itw« worth 
Xen t\xms more than it was ^ but he faid, he fear'd I 
wc^ld engage in ibme Piece of Roguerf or otber^ 
jthat neicher his Reputation nor mine woiud be able 

; 5<4 The life and Mkns fert T. 

: %Q free me from. I beg'd him only to trail that to 
- me^ and I would bear all the Blame^ without doiog 
/the leaft Injury to his Honour. Hereupon he left 
' me to do as I would^ not being able to forbear laugh* 
Jng; yet told me, if I had any Knave^r in my 
HeacL he would adirife me to take my Meamres rights 
' chat 1 mk;ht bring him his RtUqmry again^ in cafe I 
. did not (ucceed. I dpfir'd him not to doubt of diar^ 
for I would be fure . to take Care ^ fo having the 
Jewel deliver d to me, which was in a Purle^ I put it 
in my Bofiim, aiid ty'd the Strings to the Buttons 
of my Doublet. This done, I went to the firft 
Goldunith I could meet, who was an old Uiur 
rrer, and known for fuch throughout the whole 
City. Asking him if he would buy a very fine RsU-^ 
mtunji he defir d to iee it . I open'd the Purfe and fitev/d- 
It him, and he lik'd it very well. He then began to 
enquire of me who I was, and what I did at J?ixr- 
re/l9M. I acquainted him, I was come thither with a 
Company of Soldiers that were going for Italy ^ and 
that I came from Jlmagro. I told him, that havinj 
ipent all my Money, and only this Jewel left, I ha< 
l^ept it for a Referve to fumim me with Neceflaries 
before I went on board ; that if he pleas'd, he might 
enquire after me of the Captain, or any of the 
Officers belonging to the Company; that my Name 
was Don Jum dt Guzman^ and that if he heard fiich 
^Charader of me as he could venmre to buy my 
J^!«rel, he might come and find me upon the Key^ 
ts^hither I was going to fpeak with a Peribn of my 
Acquaintance about fome earqeft Bufbefs. My Man 
accepted my Propo&l, and haftening immediately to 
t^e Place where we lodg'd, did not fail to inform 
himrelf concerning me, both of the Officers. adixt 
Soldiers. He had a good Account pf me you may 
I}e fure, for he prefently came to Ibok for me npoa 
t^§ l$Ley> and haa no great Difficulty to find me, for^oti}^ £ufineis the^e, bqt tP'^a^tfor/'^Ad- 
t > trapaa 


BookIL (f (kaxt^ cTAtfirache. 9^ $ - 

trapan him. He jKdd me as foon a$ he came iip^ he t 
was come to tridat with me about my RtUauaryy and ; 
deiir'd to &e it dj^in. I gave it into his Hand^ but - 
beg'd of him to retire a little^ that People might not 
fee what we were doitigy and j^t about us. He con* 
fented; and haying confider'd it^ by turning it up and 
dowit aad every way, he ask'd me what I would have 
for it*^ I told him, ;ioo Crowns, which was not, ne- 
verthlblcfs, near what i( was worth, as I had been in- 
fpnn'd by thofe that knew as well as he. He feem'd , 
however furpris'd at my Demand, and told me, it 
was; not made of good Gold, and endeavoured to 
fhew me ieveral I>&feds, as well in the WorkmaniSiip, 
as in the Stones : In a Word, he ofFer'd me half what 
I ask'd. I told him, I had occafion for Money, and 
therefore, if he lik'd it at i^o CrowQs^ he might have 
it, and not under. He made a great nfany more; 
Cavils and Difputes, . but at laft he agreed to give me - 
400 Francs for it. He would have had me gone 
along with him to his Shop to receive the Money, 
but I told him that could not be, becauie I waited 
there for a t^riend, as I had acquainted him ; and 
that, if he pleas'd, he might fetch the Money, and. 
he inould find me there> or thereabouts. This trou^ 
bled him a little, for he would have been very g^ad 
to have paid me at home, and befides, he fear'd this : 
Friend of mine might be a Goldfmith, who might,: 
in his Abfence, buy his Bargain out of his Hands, 
by giving me a Trjfle more. Tor he k:new the Jewel . 
was worth twice as Qiuch as he ^ was to give me for 
it. This made him run aw^ immediately to fetch* 
the Money, and in the mean time I got a Comrad^^ 
of mine, as great- a Ro|;ue as my felf, to be near me, 
chat I might employ him as fbon^ as I had occafion. 
for him. My Merchant return^ gu)|:e out of Breadi, 
and all in a Sweat. He had the Money in Gold, in, 
a fiag, which having told me put, I gave him the 
tUluitiory. I defK'd jhe Bag ofbifiiy wd proffeyrU 



3^6 tlm Life and A^4m t^t I 

the Putfe in lieu of it^ which was Worth a gjreat deal 
more. He confetited with great Waiiugi^is. Ha- 
ving pnt up my Money in the Bag^ I feent'd to (kid a 
great deal of Difficulty in undofing the Strings of my 
Vvutfky which I had tied to the Buttons of mf Dou- 
blet. Seeing a Knife in a Sheath by his Si<!e^ I 
thro' impudence fnatch'd it ont^ and cut the S«^g$^ 
by which mbam I got the Ptirfe loofe. I gaire k 
him^ and he hairing no more to do^ ptfU'd o^ his 
Hat and dej^arted. He was no fooner gone^ hml 
made a Sign to my Onnrade to dome up and take 
the MoneV^ bidding him give k to the CtfptakK and 
tell him 1 would be fpeedily with him w^ the 
Jewel This done^ I march'd as fail as I could after 
my Goldfmlth^ fot I had not loft Sight of him^ and 
foon came up with him ; fc^ hz^b^g made a Bargain 
as he could wift^ be walked tdfu/ely along w^ue 
thinking any thing. It happened to be m ar Place 
irfaeft there was a Company of Soldfers Joft &awff 
t^, when making ufe ot the Otc^fion, I began to 
cry out as loud as rcoiil4 haul. Stop iTiiet, ft6p Thief! 
Pellow-SoMiers and Comrades, fiop th^t old ITiiet 
there, who has rObbM me of My Captains kefkmarfy 
ii^hich he took from me by force. The Soldiers 
knowing me to be of thait Company that was goini 
for Itsfyy and hearing me erf after mat manner, anL 
feeing me ihed fome Tears befides, thought dier^ 
muft be ibmething in the Matter, and therefore 
quickly ftop'd the Man, asking him why he wt)uld 
wrong fiicn a youn^ tad * I was. I wrong him, 
faid-the Goldfinith ! iofurpri&'d^ tfcat he cduld hardly 
ipeak, I hs?ve done, him no Wrong. Then I began 
to tell them, gaiteotifof Breath as I was. Ah, Gentle- 
inen, he*s a Thirf, an old Rogue, have pity i^on me, and 
f0 falling down on my Knees, if6 wrought upon trhem, 
that they conf innalfy ask'd me" what was the Matter, 
and would then turn to the Met'(:hant, and ask him 
*Rijg;ray thefetoe<iueftioii 

'^ Inter- 

^ookA (f GustMri cTAIfatiche.^ ^6y 

ntenupte^ him; and well knowing what Adrantage 
\c has that fpcafcs ftrft^ I operfd and t61d them. My 
::::aprain, whom they all knew, having left by chance 
lis Reb^tary at his Beds-head, fent me home, and bid 
cne take Care of it. I going to look after lAn to 
give it him, this Thief, whom I took for an honcft 
Man, feeing fomething in my Hand, came up to mc 
to look at it, and when he law what it was, he pre- 
tended to be a Goldfmidi, wherenpon I ask'd him 
what it might be worth. He looking flightly on it 
told me it was only Copper ^t, and that the Stones 
were falfe, but beoaufe t>{ the Work, if 1 would fell 
it him, he would ^ve me what it was worth. 1 told 
himlcoisdd not fell it, by reafon it was my Cap- 
tain's, when he defffing to fee it again, airf oblervlng 
it was in a Purft that was tied to my Button, he aS 
of a fudden, while he amus'd me with Words 
fnatch'd forth a Knife he had at his Girdle, and in-' 
ftaiitly cut the Strings, as is yet to be Icen j by which 
means, having got my Purfe, he immediately ran 
away with my R^ifuarp Now, continued I in the 
fame paffionate manner, I beg of you, Fellow-Sol- 
diers and Comrades, to dive into his Pockets, anJl 
you'l find what I fay to be true. The Soldiers leeing 
a gr^atdeal of LikeKhood in what I laid, and being 
exccecS6gly fet againft the Goldfmith, loaded himr 
with innumerable Inveftivcs and Reproaches, o? 
Old grioing Ufurer, old Thief, old Rogue, and the 
like J which Names alfo the Standers-by, who knew 
him, faluted Mm with ; and being mov'd by my 
Tears and Enfereaties,, they feH to groping the old 
Dog, dnd loiind-the Piirle juft asfhad iaid,^ with 
the Strings cut^ l^dthe ktli^arym it. The Gold- 
fmich trembkdrtVeiy' Joint of hita upon this plain 
Convi&ion, axid^came as pale as Death. Begging^ 
leave w fpeak, he pnwfted and vow'd he had bdught 
this Purfe and Jewel of me for 460 /r^^/, which he 
had p«id Me In g<)Qd Goldr ^t the ScMlers wotilit 
^ nor 

3^8 The Ufe and AStimit^ Bifcl 

not believe him^ there being no probability^ as they 
£dd^ tlbat fuch an old Fox as he^ who knew his 
Trade^ would buy b rich a Jewel as diat of iucb a 
young Fellow as I^ and give fb much Money fork 
without knowing me, for he would prefently be 
apt to imagine I had ftolen \t^ or done worfe^ at my 
firft Offer of it. Here the N|erchant demanded that 
Ilhouldbefearch^d toOj andhedid not doubt but th^ 
would find the Money about mty which he haid gt- 
Ten for the ; Rdujuary. I was accordingly fearch d^ 
bbt not a Soufe was founds whereupon they b^;an to 
treat my IJfurer after an unmerciful rate^ boro with 
•Words and iDeeds i and when they found fac would 
needs go before a Judge^ they carried us both to one* 
As foon as I came there^ I befi;an to tell the fame 
Story I had told the Soldiers^ who flood bv me^ mi 
were WitneiTes for me. The Judge confidering the 
Matterj^. and finding the Goldunlth had litde or no- 
thing to fay for himfelf^ reprimanded hisn (evetelyj 
but as he was an old Cit^zen^ tho' he knew him to 
be as oldaRogue3 he did not fend him toPrifofii 
but Ibar'd him tor that time^ telling him^ if ever he 
heara of the like Crime again^ he muft not expeft 
to be ib favourably us'd. As for the Reli^p$arjy he or- 
der d the Soldiers to carry it to the Captain^ who 
gave them larjgely to drink at the Expenoe of the 
poor Goldfinith, who was ready to hang himielf for 
the lofs of his Money. 

Roguery always pleafes thofe beft who have the be* 
nefit of it^ and not thofe who coinmi^it ; die (ameit is 
with Tray tors and Treafbn. He that doesiU^ may 
Urell pleale them for whom he dbes |it^ bitt he ihaU 
never be the better efteem'd pr bskw'4. 'Tjis Punifl^ 
ment that makes a baid A<^oa ^iJlfiporovM, . even hf 
him that has the Advantage of ic^ becaulb he does 
(io( know but ^ one time or other it may come to be 
his oWn Tum^ if iie encourages fi^^ unwarrantable 
Poin^ ^^ J^ yi^ dpaiiiliT]^ tQone^ may 
" . '" '' do 

»!• • 

^kn. ^Guztinan d^Alfarache. 31^^ 

do it to another^ and coafequendy impeach him that 
let him to Work. When we want Virtue, \ye muft 
of neceffity entertain Vite. The fame is to be met 
with every where ; and he that has betray 'd you once^ 
will not fail to do it again whenever he has an Oprf 
portonity. My Captain, to whom this Affiftango 
came very feafonably, wds not dilpleas'd, you may 
be fure, at its'boming j but flill he fbund the Ai^ion 
veiT bold, and that dSfturb'd him a littl?. He lik'd 
Well enough my Legerdemain Tricks, fime he reajr'^ 
Benefit by them, but he was ifraid of theGortfeouenry 
ces of thecrt> ds well in regard to nie as hinifelr, for f 
he did not know but at laft he might be hook'd intoi 
ibnle damn'd Pramunire by them. H6 therefore s^r 
iblv'd, as fbon is he fhould get to Genoa^ where n9 
believ'd he fhould have no mrther oc|:a(jon formal 
to get rid^f me as ibon as he could. This is gencrt 
rally dlie Fate of us popir Fellows that are good fot 
nothing. We are made ufe of like Vipers and Sport 
pions as long as thert can be any good sot out of U$^ 
and afterwards we arc thrown out of Door?. A^ 
wlule after we were landed, my Captain took naqi 
afide. and faid to me. Friend Guijman, fee now we 
are m ttaty^ whither you fo much defir'd to cpine ; 
I have no further occafion for you, as you W(sl| 
know ^ and befides, your little Tricks may one time 
or other brin^ me into an Inconvenience, therefor^ it 
IS high time w^ fhould part. Yoti khtw the Capa^ 
city of my Pocket, and I could wifti X were in 4 
better Condition to acknowledge your goo4 Places 

&% they deferve j j may, perhaps, one pay s In thq? 
mean time take this TiJloU^ and make the beft ufe pjf 
it yoi; can, aid be perfwaded 'ti$ with great JRLe- 
gret that I can make you no better Recoiiipence^ 
Tbjis feid, he turn d fliort upon me and left nje, buf 
f could fee by his mournful Air, that 'twas tiot with 
a little Reluftance that he forfook me. 1 flood as i^ 
t were Thund^r-ftfUGk; having not 9 Word tp offer* 


and if I crald have ipoke^ lie would not ftay to hear 
me ; io getting me out of the Houle^ I march'd a- 
long the Streets widi thy Hat orec my Eycis^ confi- 
deiing that if Virtne nc^er lets a Man .go without a 
Reward one time or odier^ Vice fetdom fails of pro- 
curing him Punifhment^ and Infamy to boot. I would 
have fain fpoke with my Captain3 to have reprefen- 
ted to him the bad Conditidn I had brought my felf 
2nto^ principally on his Account^ and the Services I 
liad done him in hisNeceffity, and that at the hazard 
of my Life, with no Advantage to my felf; but I 
t thought he would not hbarfcen to any Reafons I could 
give nim,. after he had thus fhaken me off^ as a rotten 
Kfember that would be apt to infeA the whole Body. 
I therefore comforted ihy felf in that I wacs got to 
Genoa y where, having ^encpiir'd after my Rcbtions, 
I learn'd they were fome of the moft Powerful 
Perfons of the Republick. This rlsftored my Cou- 
rage a little, not doubting but I (hould be relieved by 
them as fbon as they came to know me. 



fook Mi rf Guztisaii d*AI^ach& 3^7 1 

*-\ i i ■ - I w -' ^ ^ iii ' ' ' 11 'l' • III •- III , I I I , , t ' i , „• T | • | - , „- | ,., | , ^ f 

t H E 

ttfE and ACTIONS 


Of tlie l^amolis 


« • 

Guzman d'Alferacha 

• • • 

Part 1. Book llL 

^"•^ .'.% .. ■ ■- 1.< 


Gu^mati difcourfes of Riches and Poverty^ ' dhd the 
E0Ss of Both Then he proceeds to tell how hi 
pas rej0ed by his Retatiom^ and what Trick, 
he had plaid him tthile he ia>as in meji of them % 
Mnd bonf at tafi he tool{^ the Road aireSly totipard^ 

IHER£ is nothing fo difficult, as the World 
j^es^ i^ to give the true Definition of H 
fich Min. f am^ for Example, come ifttd 
i City where I have fome Friends^ or fom© 
i^erlbtiSj to whom I have been recommended. They 
iiid^af our to cr^at me after the beft Manner^ ^d 

B b d ft9fm 

372 The Life and ASUons Vitt L 

propofe to me to go and pafs an Evening at a Ridotto 
OT AjJembUiy where there is both Gaming and Mu- 
fick, and fometimes a Repaft. A Stranger that tra- 
vels, defires no better i I am carry 'd thither^ and I 
find a very noble Affembly of Perfons of the beft 
Quality of either Sex. They pay me fbme Civilities, 
becaufe I am a Foreigner ; then they leave me, by 
reafon they arc pre-engag'd to give Attention,^ and 
make Court to a Perion, who, by the Refpeft is 
ftiewn him, feems to be the moft oonfiderable of the 
whole Company. Tis true, he is all Gold from Head 
CO Foot, has a Diamond-Belt about his Middle^ largs 
and ffne Stones upon his Fingers, and his Garters and 
Shoe-Buckles glitter immoderately. He makes a great 
Noife j every body talks to him, both Men and Wo- 
men ; every body flares at him , hearkens to, and! 
applauds him« But to me, that do not know him, 
he jfeems but a Coxcomb, and talks very idlely. 
I lee nothing at all in him but what is Ridiculous, 
and I could &id in my Iteart to laugh at him but for 
good Manners. What antick Poftures he has I What 
an aflFecated Voice! and what Grimaces does he make! 
1 Ipeak lerioufly, were it not for the Company he 
was in, I fliould be tempted to believe he was hif a 
Fool. I am ft^rk Mad to know who he is j I muft 
know, and I can't help it. Here's a Gentlethan^ one 
of thofe that brought me hither, will inform me, I 
fuppofe. Pray. Sfr, let me beg of you to tell toe, 
who that fame nonetf Man is, whom there's fb much 
Buffle about ? You have guefs'd your felf„ anfwcrd 
he laughing, he's an honeft Man, a Man of Wit, and 
one who knows how to make the beft of his Af&irs at 
any time. At that very Moment^my Friend was call'd 
away to plary a Party at Ticket vt^itn this fine G^tle- 
man, and lo I could have no more Difcourfe with 
him. He ran away immediately, for he took it for 
a great Honour that was done him^ and fo left me as 
.wife as I was. before^ My Curiofity neverthelefi aug- 


Book III. 0/ Guzman d^Alfaf ache. 379 

ments^ I fee nothing extraordinary in this Man's 
Phyz, nor any thing that (hews him to be a Man of 
equality ; he jnuft needs have his Employment, if any^ 
in the Country, for I'm fure he would not be em- 
pl9y*d here. All the Ladies are mad to play with 
him ; and thofe that cah'c have that Honour^ content 
themfeives to fi^ by, and fliew him all the Civilities 
they can. I fancy he. treats them nobly ; they lovq 
to be treated , and to get a Man's Money at Play^ 
for I believe hp's Bubble enough to themv But her^ 
comes one, I fancy, will fatisfy my Curiofity about 
this Beau. 1 befeech you. Sir, if you love me, tell m^ 
who that Man is,about whom every body lb fwajrms, 
to whom every body makes fo man)^ Criqges, and 
upon whom all the Ladies (6 gaze, as if they had not 
Eyes enough to fatisfy d^eir Curiofity. Whaf, fay$ 
he, is it poffible you mould not know him! Why, it 
is Signior the Count of Nr— ? A Count, iaid I ! How 
could I know him, when I have not been in this Ci^ 
ty above thefc two Days? Would you have me di^ 
vine? No, reply^d he, that's not to be expeded; but 
yoi^ muft know he has looooo Francs a Year, a fin^ 

f'k Coach, a numerous Equipage, keeps a good 
able, is in great Reputation at Court, goes every 
where, and is very well receiv'd where-ever he goes. 
AU this is well for him, anfwer I; but what is- all this 
€0 you or me, who have no occafion for him ? Why 
mim we pay our Devoirs to him, and look upon hiiQ 
as the Cock of ^he Game, like others that itand in 
seed of him? Has he any Employment in the Coun^ 
try where he lives, or does he exped Adoration 
merely on account of his jplftate ? Noj, hp lias no 
Employment , but when a Man has three or four 
Millions of Money, he can't want for either Quality^ 
Wit, Merit, Or Virtuep But once more, pray telj 
me, what fort of Man is he, for hitherto I have 
obferv'd nothin|g but ridiculous Honours paid to him, 

ffld fppUft affsded Cringing an<J Crowding abput 

5 b I Ww? 

^74 ^^^^ m^ anJAtUohs^ VinV 

him ? He hasj I tell yoa^ neap Four. Milfionsjk his 
Pockety and owes tio body a CroiL He is^ in a word;^ 
a very hon^ft Gentleman^ and treats the Company 
to Nighty and I am to be iqnted^ and I beUeve'yoU 
lyill too. As for my Invitation^ quoth I^ I thank 
him^ but I am engaged elfevrtiere : I can neither 
ti^ait upon him nor his Four Milltofis. Bat my Que^ 
ftion is fet Imdedded^ therefore I muft needs ask 

this'Lady^ and I am afraid we fhail lo(e otir Mo- 
tiey.-'I km fiiad with ail my Hearty cry I^ that I can't 
^Ct an Aii^er to what I ask fb plainly^ and which 
Inay^bci ^nM6rd in tv^roWprds. BUt I guefi^ by the 
little I have heard, what the reft may be^ and pity 
the^l^effort with all my Soul. In the midft of thdc 
RtfleAIoShs of mine upon moft Peoples Behaviour to- 
wards a rich Man^ an Accident ha]^n'd in regard 
to rt>y felf, foif either in tha? I was a Stranger, or 
becaiife he had heard of my Name, this fame Count 
turns about, and deiires me to give Judgment upon a 
iPoint at Play. I came up to him with a great de4 
of Reiped as 1 ikw cdiers do before me, and lend? 
ing my Ear attetitively to all he faid, began to con^ 
fioer of his Cafe, but found he the wjtoogj 
heverthelefs, for fi^u* of difobliging'-him^ Ijdsd ben 
half give it againft him. Now were not I the greats 
eft Fool of all the Company, for fitfferingmy feif to 
be byafs'd. by Riches^ after I hnd conclenxi'd tfae.liJcc 
^olly in other People. \ . / .^ . /a 

'Tis fiot poffibie to give a more naturtf Defcri}!^ 
tion of a rich Man, than. I have done by this. &da- 
iion: Now let us turn die Medal, and fee MHbat we 
have upon $:heR^vei?fei why 'tis Powrty. which hte 
always been tny Portioii, anc^wheneof a right Defmii- 
tion may be given,^ finoe Flattery ha^ tiottuiig to do 
With it. Flattery is its ^^poncUera^. £sietoy^o!jfo 

BookllL </iGiiztmn #AIfirach& ^j% 

)>e cpmmoifiy to be fouadamoi^ the Poor^ b^ing an 
'BffdStoilmigsncty apd* tpo^quendy the o4ly Re4 
f uge of Pwert^*- . .• * 

PovertT is either Davghrer of the Spirit and Wii^ 
dom^ aod then ihe is a Treafure; or el(e flie i^ Mo-; 
ther to Infamy and Reproach^ than which nothing 
cajihappen woiie toMsuL She is his greateft Enetnyj 
ihe is a contagioitf Leper * fiie is a Sea where Pati- 
ence often Shipwrecks; a Roc4c whei'e Honour gene*- 
ralLy fptits* a Fire that coniiimes our Lives; and za 
pbiivions Draughty that makes 4js forget what we are; 
Poverty^ is a fort m Coin that paiTes no where. It is 
the Curfe of the whole Earthy the Sink of a City^ 
the Refufeof the Market^ and the Afs to a rich 
Man* The poor Man will ever be one that eats laft^ 
and always what is left^ though he pays dearly for't. 
His Mciney i$ falfe^ his Wifdonv Folly, his Wit Non- 
f&o&^ ai}a his Sentiments Trifles. He has no Reve** 
0ue but what comes from the Publick. No body 
mak6$. a Scruple of affronting him, every body flies 
bim^ M *,he happens to come into Company; it muft 
be iusrpart to give Attention; and if he willar- 
pic^ he^ always jhojight too bold, and will ever be 
interrupted. Tho' he benfever lb Ingenious, he 
rouft be iQppos'd to want Wit ; and if he fucceed in 
lUDy Uodertaki^, he will be thought a Conjuren 
The^ leaft offenlive Word he utters, is judg'd next a-. 
kin .to Bkfghemy^ and the leaft Fault he commits, 
unworthy of any Pardon. There's no Appeal for him 
in this* World, and he niuft wait for his Remedy in* 
the neai:t. JEvery body is againlt him, and no body 
takes his.Part. He can have no Affiftanee in his Ne- 
iceffity, no Comfort in his Adverfity, nor no Com- 
pany in his Solitude. AH die World thwarts him, 
all the Woicld pillages him. He owes no body any 
things and yet every body exaAs fome thing fronjt 
him./. How unfortunate and tniferable is the poor 
M^i wh© is 4?Wig*d' 4:0"f)urchafc even his Leave to 

jt^ I He U^ and ARii^ fefftl 

^eg, which I knew foldoflcc by an JJcJUe of a cer- 
tain City. A poor Man may h^ve as much Wit as 
he Will, he miift ftill be contented to be devoured by 
3otS3 Uke ftale Mcaf that is thrown out to Dogs. 

Lei: r us retwn.once more to the rich Man^ who 

iias ^vV the Wind in his Pood^^ and fails with a full 

Gale. The Sea is always calm and quiet for him, 

^nd be meets with nothmg.that gives him the leaft 

Difturbance, He h?s neitheyr Care nor Trouble, his 

Gran^ieij are full of Corn, his Cellars of Wine, and 

his Cabinets and Coffers of Money. He makes a 

Winter of Summer, and of Summer a Winter. He 

inverts the Seafons, or . rather is fenfible of none. 

Let him do what he will, every Thing fueceeds with 

pirn , and he is well received where-ever he comes* 

Let him talk what he pleafes, hes always in the 

right, TitA no body dar^ to contradid him. He may 

inake Abfurd Things pafifpr Gallantries, Fooliih iot 

3enteuces, and Lies fqr Railleries. Though, iw be a 

Rogue,' ha s ilil'd an honeft Man, and one Jthat un- 

derftan4s himlelf If he be Prodigal> he paifes for 

Libera) ; }f Covetous^ ft)r ^ Peribn of Qeconomy j 

ai^d i£ Infolent, for on^ pnly th^t takes an innocent 

Freedom. ^ If he affronts yov, *tis all good Manners 

in him j if he banters you> 'tis a fign of good Hu* 

tnour ; and if he talks you to Death, an Argument 

of his good Converfatipnt : If he be over-mucn given 

to Wpmeri, he pajTes only for a g^lant Perfohj ifaa 

Extortioner, for a Man of Authority ; if.anopiaio* 

native Fallow, for one that is fteady and coiiftantj 

\f a common Swearer ^ for a brave and reftlute 

Hero ; and if a flow, and ftupid Blockhead, for one 

that is grave and iblid, ajid \pho does nothing with* 

out mature Deliberation. All this neverthelefs is 

Jjothihg, and we ftiouU never have doile, ihould we 

examine all the Excravaeanoies that toe in the 

World. We heed only pblerve how afraid every bo* 

dy is pf a rich Man j h)o\^ rO body itv«l tO-difj?letfe 

IRopkUl 0/ Guzman dl^lfar^kche* ^77 

bini, and how eafily he brines his Caufe to a good 
Hearing , becaufe he himfelf is both Judge , Party, 
and Wicnefs. One need only obferve, I lay, how 
a rich Perfon is waited upon, flattered and care(5'4* 
wherc-ever he comes. Let ils conclude then, Thaj; 
Poverty, according to the common Maitim of th^ 
World, for ^tis of that I (peak, is what renders on$ 
the loweft of Men, and Riches what elevates one 
above all others. Wbere-ever Blood boils, or th^ 
PuUe of Honour beats. Want is look'd upon a grea--^ 
ter M^ortune than the lols of Life, becaufe Monej^ 
alone (ets the Blood a-iioat , and gives us a Being, 
He that has hone> is like a dead Corps tifat walks uff 
and d6wn like a Ghoft among the Living. Without 
Money a Man cari do nothing to the purpofe, nor 
hardly f^leaie himfelf with what he does. This is the 
ordtoaiV Courfe of the World, and there's no Rem'ev 
dy for (t: As \ye found it, fo we Ihall leave it. 'Tij 
a folly to pretend to find a better way than that w$ 
are in ; and yet a greater, to think that our Fore-fa- 
thers were wifer than we in this Particular. What is 
liow, has been, and will ever be the fame. Our firft 
Father was an Infidel, pur flrft Mother a Liar, an4 
their 1?irft-bom, bofh a Robber and Parricide. Wha? 
is there that has not been already, and what can w6 
hope from what IhaB come herean:er ? If what is pai^ 
feems better to us, \is becaufe we feel the prefenc 
lUs^but neither remember the paft Benefits nor Trou- 
bles any otherwife, than to rejoice at our being got 
rid of tnem^ There's nothing more ple^fant than to 
behold a Meadow at a diftance, it Charms us with 
its Beauty and Verdure j but when we come near itj^ 
we find nothing but MaHhes and Boj^s ^ we know 
not where to fet a Foot,every thing diipleafes us, and 
we muft go elfewhere for ttiat Pleafure We thought 
to have round there. It is as common as ancient in 
the Worl^d for Men to loVe Prosperity, court Riches^ 
i^k Cpt^TeiueiiCies^ hbpur ftfcer pittUcuUr loterefts. 


178^ • Tke life and Altiom Pi«tt 

9nd to deGre Abundance wkh Pai&on. Where that is 
Wanting^ the Father is wanting to the Son^ the Son 
to the Father, the Brother to the Brother, the Friend 
to the Friend, and I am wanting to my felf. More 
than one Experience has render a me wife qpon this 
H^d. My Life has been a perpetual School^ for tne 
%<0, learn thefe Leifons in at my own Expence. If I 
|lad Known better when I oame to Ge^, I h94 ^'^ 
^een expos'd in the Condition ( was iii to appear bCt 
fore my Relations, in order to make my i^f . knowQ 
to them. I Ihould have waited^ a more fanfom^bi^ 
Opportunity till J had (>een better cloath'd. I fbpftitld 
fiot have Iq^ my i^lf with th^ma; X dlid^ m yoa'l 
find by what follows ; ..••:,'. 

I had no (boner parted with my Capti^iii, o^ xt^ 
fpe^k more properly, he had no footer wu^^ ;^ith 
xtity than I iet mv felf about looking atcer ,aii^(hei 
llin, where I mignt live thriftily,. till Ti^h tjfng a&| 
<^ould find and (peak with my Relations. { ^4$ ia? 
.deed in a very bad Equipage,, yi^t a Sl^ and 5iip« 
were what I wanted moft. Thefe forced n^.^ ;tijp 
my Ti^fiU^ of which, above one half went a^ <;^e. \kf 
Cloaths feem'd tp have been ;f9{nethi^ fom^Xf^ 
but now they were like the Ruliis of Tn^j. . yi^ Hst 
and Stockings were not muph b^tper. . Tho^^yoigtry 
was exaiJt When I had my new Shoes ^4:^,hlrt Pf^y 
I thought no body would fook on any other ^artj of 
me. At length, m as ill a Pickle a^ I W2^$, jt:refaly'4 
\o go and look after my Relations, and to t^l evei^f 
body I had the Honour to be of their Family^ that 
is, of good OldGothick Extri(%ion. This beit^ quiek- 
lyTpread abroad, my Relations came to tho heaiiog 
pf it, and were v^ry mu-ch offended. T^ey jtopk'd 
ypon my Mifery as a downright Scandd'fp .tJbeip> 
and. I believe, if they could but have rid fne^ont or 
^he way handiomely, they would not have- ftugk tq 
have do^e it/uch |^r«4^ife^ being but ^99 ^ 

BookllL ^Guzman d'Alfan^che. g^jf 

that Country ; but as I began to be talk'd of ki. a 
City vrtiere my Father had been fo well known^ j£t 
had diiappear d all of a fudden^ the Caufe would 
have been foon guefs'd at. You muft not. chink it 
much^ Reader^ that I were expos'd to fuch Hazards^ 
for had you been in my Relation's Cafe^ and feeii 
fiich a miserable Fellow as I come and falut^ yo]| 
openly in the great M^ket-l!^lace^ and call you tjni 
cle or Coien3 could yiou have forbora entertaining 
feme fuch-like Thoughts? Imprudence was always 
on niy Side^ and Shame and Deteftation on theirs : 
They therefore i?eceiv'd nie juft as you or any other 
would have done. 1 never faluted one of them that 
did not treat me with the Titles of Rafcal and Im^ 
poilpr^ and threaten to fend me far enough off; 
You a Ge^oefe? cry they to me, with Rage and Con-» 
fufion in |heir Faces: You the Son of luch a one? 
You v« rather the Soq of a Whore^ ^fhat thought fi^ 
to do him that Honour. Go, get you* gone, if yoa 
han't a mind to have Spurs in . your« Ar-*e, to ienq 
you away fafter. You would have bieSR itpt. to belicv^ 
now> my Father died iqo Years ago, jand had noPa-j 
rentage left, fo loth were thefe RekaoQS of his tci 
pwnhirn. At length, however, Vinet^a ceruin o^ 
Rogue, who nodoubthadheardof me, who receiving 
me with all the Civility imaginable, laid to me widi 
an if^ipuating Air, Young Man,I reniember fbmething| 
of th« Perfon you fpeak of, and who yon fay -waji 
your Father. There 'are certainly in this-Gity fe* 
veral of thf^ principal Cobles that are his Relatioas | 
and lean bring you to a Man who -will make yoi| 
known to them. It is now fomewharla^e, and joi^ 
iiave ito be fure.fupp'd; come therefore and lodg^ 
wich^me, and'to morrow I will carry you to^ 
{awe Perrpiry who will givt you^ ^tisfa^iou, ^if 
unriddle all this Miftefcy, Q, Thanks < be to God j 
laid % to my fclf, altogether tranlpprted witfejo 
f\m I ^y^ « M ««9t V^«H m^OBeft Maoiiti tl 

!j8 d The Life and ASlions Part L 

City, who will take Pity on my Misfortunes. I fan- 
<tied now. Fortune would be reconcird to mc, and 
that I had gain d the Point I defir'd. I faw I had to 
do with a Peribn of a venerable A(ped, with a grave 
and ferious Air, a bald Head, ana a white Beard 
that reach'd down to his Girdle. /He hlid a Staff in his 
HancLand a lon^Robe after the'^manner of the noble 
Genoe/es. I fencied him another St. Taul, and I hear- 
kened to him as an Oracle ; all that he faid,appearing 
to me not only Truths, but Sentences. 1 had no 
Thoughts of diftrufting him j I foUow'd him to his 
Houfe fo pleas'd, that I hardly knew whether I 
f ouch'd the Ground with my Feet or not. Tis true^ 
that Compliment pf, Tou barue to he fure fuffd^ did 
by no means pleafe me j* it was fuch as they make at 
Cordoua j but I thought at Genoa, like many other 
places, when People have eat well themfelves, they 
don't fancy any Body elfe can be hungry. For m\ 
part, my Misfortune was fuch, that I had eat lei 
that Day than any of the foregoing, my Tifiole being 
Juft at an end, fb riiat I made worfe and worfe Cheer 
cVery Hour. But there was no Remedy, I muft en- 
dure it in (pite of my Teeth, rather than lofe fo fair 
kn Opportunity of getting acquainted with my Re- 
lations, as this old Fellow oiFer'd me. As foon as 
we were cdme to his Houfe, a Servant came to meet 
him to take off his lopg Gown, but he would not part 
with it. Then fitting down, he began to joober 
with him }n Italian, which I did not underftand, 
but which did not laft long, for he foon font him 
•way, and conduced me iftto a great Hall, to en- 
tertain himfelf with me. He began by asking me 
feveral Queftions concerning the Affairs of Spain , 
and from them ttroeeeded inftftfibly to thcrfe ot our 
Fartiily. He infbrm'd himfolf 'very cuiioufly con- 
cerning my Mother : ask'd if my Father had left 
her much ; as like wife, how many Brothers and Si- 
fters I had J yfh^t part of Sc^$h we Uv'd ia ; with 
•" ' ' many 

Book IIL of Guirtian d'Alfafjfchc. jf i 

many ;other Particulars j in all which I fatisfied hioi. 
to a Tittle. This lafted above an Hour, when the 
fame Servant came, I fuppofe, to acquaint him his 
Orders had been obey'd, and that all was ready. 
I, however, underftood nothing of the Matter j but 
at laft; the old Gentleman, turning about to me, 
faid, I believe you are weary, "ana would gladly be 
a-bed : 111 leave you to your Repofe, and return ta 
you stgatn to morrow Morning, Then he cry*d^ 
Ho there, Ahtmio Maria^ come and wait upon the 
Gentleman to . his Chamber. It was defign'd I 
fiiould fee the fineft part of the Houfe, which was 
indeed a Palace, and therefore I was carried through 
Sevch or Eight Rooms fucceflivcly, all magnificent* 
ly furnifhed, and where the moft common Orna- 
ment was Marble. From thenoe I was cpnduded 
into a long Gallery, dt the ttvA, of which was a large 
and fine Bed-Chamber, with a noble Bed in it, and 
very rich Tapiftry-Hangings, wrought with Silk and 
Gold after the manner of Turky. The other Orna«» 
naents and Furniture were proportionably rich and 
noble. This Roonl was fit to Ipdge a Prince in^ 
but now muft have only a poor Beggar ; who, ne«« 
verthelefs, might have been more happy if he had 
, not had thi$ Honour. I was altogether confounded 
^t it, but that was becaufe I knew not what w^9 
preparing for me. )^e were no iboner come into 
this Chamber, but Antmio Marh having 
nie,ic was his Mafter s Pleafure I ihould lodge there^ 
where only Princes had lodg'd before, he began to 
offer me his Affiftance to undrefs me. I thank'd 
him, but would not iui&r it, not having a mind to 
let him altogether know my Poverty j and b^fidgs, 
niy Rags were fo crazy, they were to be handled 
^ith more than ordinary Difcretioii. The Valet, 
either through Malice, or that he thought it his 
puty, and that I oppos'd it meerly out of iueremony^ 

infifted upon doing me the Service he ofter'd* Catchy 


^H The Ufe 4mt ASicHB Part! 

log me twice or thrice by the Sleeve^ he would 
bave polled off my Coat and Doublet in Ipite of my 
Teedi^ but that I prcTented him^ by holding faft at 
the oth^ end> and 'twas a Wonder of Wonden he 
Ikad not torn both to Pieces. At lengthy quite tir'd 
vkh Compliments^ Ibeg'dofhim^ for the Love of 
God^ to let me alona^ for that I never made u(e of 
n Senrant to help me off with my Cloaths : Upon 
this^ he defifted for fear of angring me^ which he 
iaw he had almoft done* I then retir'd behind the 
Bed^ and letting fall die Curtains, dropt my Rags 
giently upon the Floor^ which were held together 
mAv uy a few Laces. This done^ I got into Bed^ 
Md quickly found the Sheets were PerfumU I 
told the Senrant^ he might take awiy the Candle if 
fie pleas'd ; but he anfwer'd^ It was not convenienty 
for that in this Country^ in fudi high-pitch'd Rooms 
as that was^ it was a comnton thing for large Bats to 
fiide themielves^ who were very dangerous a*Night5> 
feut would fly from any Light. He alio added^ Twas 
euftomary in this City to leave a Candle burnings 
to drive away certam Spirits that haunted greac 
Houfes, and ivould do a great deal of Mifchie^ but 
by no means lov'd the Light. He told me all thefe 
Stories with a ibrt of Air^ that a wifef Man than I 
might have been deceived by. NeVerthelefi^ as much 
k Fool as I was^ I was more afraid of Bats^ which I 
hated exceedingly^ than Spirits. The Servant was 
no iboner gone out of my Chamber^ but I got np 
to go and fook whether the Windows and Door were 
tirell faften'd^ md I found all fafe ; neterthelefs^ for 
better Security^ I boked the Door. Now think- 
in^ neither Spirit nor Bdt could get in^ I went very 
quietly to Bed again^ and in oae time fell afleep> 
flotwidiftanding any Impreffion I might receive from 
thefe Stories, jlefore I flept, I anius'd my felf with 
reflefting oil the good will of this VeneraWe old 
Oentieman^ not knowing but he might prote my 



^ . 




BookllL (^ iGuzmaa d'Alfarachel |l| 

Relation at laft^ and treat me thus Hke a Stranget 

meeriy 4x> lurprife me the next Morning. This was 

a good Beginmng I thought^ ^nd I fancied I ihbald 

have a Taylor at my Lewt before I was well awake 

to make me a Suit of Cloaths. t was^ however,- 

]!>erfaaded, I ihould never want for any thing, for; 

that fuch rich and noble Relations as i h^^ wotdd^ 

never foffer that Difiionoiir. What other Iritereft 

could this good Man have^ quoth I, to treat me rf- 

ter this rate ? The Condition I am in, could never 

engage him to throw away fo many Civilities uporf 

me.. He would not cany me home with hini, tor 

drive me out of Doors afterwards. He muft infalK- 

biy be my Relation^ and that very near ; and I ftiay 

now well lay, I have ihet with good Fortune, an4 

an honeft M^n, tho' lb Uhufual a Happineis for me tqr 

%ht upon. I have not loft my Pdns in coming ta 

'^fy J and tis well faid, that a Man's Blood cannot 

£e. trhus young and unexperienced as I was, I rea-^ 

^jbtid mdi my (elf, not being able to comprehend 

idiar too great Kindnefles were never without fome 

Pry-Defigns. However, being invited to reft by la 

deUcious^ahd delicate a Bed, 1 fell fo profoundly ai 

fleep, as I've already told you, that I did not hear 

the Nolfe of Four Hobgoblins, or rather Four De- 

trils, t^at enter d my Chamber foon after, vrtio 

coming to my Bed-fidd, and feizing me j>y all Four^ 

put me into luch a tcfrrible Fright, that I was rather 

dead than living. They were all habited Hke Devils^ 

. with huge long Tails, frightful Vizards, and two 

Hortis on* each of their Heads* • I could not Ipeak 

I was fo furpris'd, and had lordly any Life left in mel 

Alltiiat I could get out, was the Name of 5^/^if, 

and fome few Prayers 1 had learn d by Heart, whicht 

neverdidefs iignined nothing to thefe Chriftian Dc-: 

vils, which afterwards I came to underftand they 

were. They had fpirited away mv Bed-Cloaths in 

a momenta when uking meinto tnek Hands, they 


384 'The Life and AMiotis Fafrt t 

began to tofs me after chat rate^ that tho^ the Cham- 
ber was exceeding highj I fear'd I ihould have my 
Brains beat out againfl the Ceiling. But they con- 
tented themfelves with* only bruifmg me^ and tir'd 
as they were^ for they did not leave off tiil they 
could hold out no longer^ plac'd tUe aC length in my 
Bed again all batter^d^and bruis'd almiofl: to a Ahmmj. 
There was no fign of Life left in me^ but the Sighs 
I fetch'd^ which in any but Chriftian Devils Would 
have wrought fome Pity. They cover'd me over as 
diey foundme^ put out the Candle^ and fo left mo 
as if there had been no Harm done. My whole Bo- 
dy was fo disjointed and mauVd^ I could not fleep a 
Wiok> and it was ali^ady broad Day before I came 
to mv ielf^ and knew where I was^ fof I hAd all along 
fancied I came piping Kot from Helt. God^ who 
iav'd me that bout from Deaths knew well why he 
did iEb« As I were about to rijfe^ for I belief'd bj this 
time the evil Spirits were gone^ I fmelt an ill-fa* 
Votir'd Imell not far off from me ; which made me 
immediately gueG^Fear had had the fame effed upon 
me as it had upon the Cook's Wife. I was not mif- 
taken, and getting up, fa w what I fb very much fuf-^ 
pe&ed.' I knew no better Remedy, than to clean it 
the beft I could with the Sheets, which I did, and 
then reiblv'd ico get me aw^ as faft as I could 
out of that curled Houfe. Renediog upon the cruel 
Adventure I had had that Night, I was like to have 
thought it a Dream, had not mv poor Bones 
told me to the contrary. I was hardly able to 
itir^ yet would needs get up, and fee how thofe De* 
vik Incarnate could come at me. I found the Door 
and Windows^ as I had left there, fad fiiue. This 
frighted me, tor then I thought it muft needs be the 
Devil I had had to do with. Well but, thought I, 
tvhy ihould his Infernal Majefty take mor^ pleafure 
in Blanketting me than another. This was not liks^ 
l)c, 1 fancy'd^ t;ho' p$jrh?p^ I betwrdsferv'dit; I th^re* 


Book III. of Guzmart d'AIfarache. 5^^ 

fore lifted up theHangings to fee if there were not fome falfc ' 
Dooif behind them^ and I found two great Windows tliat. 
look'd i|ito \ht long Gallery,whcreof orii was open,at which . 
I fuppos'd thefe curfed Spirits came in, and went out again 
after they had executed tlieirill-naturdCominiflion. .riaid . 
not a Word, I only drefs'd me as feft as I could, and having 
put the Bed-Cloatns in order,which 1 had left othcrvi^lc per- - 
fum^d than I had found them, I foftly itole towards the 
Door, withdefignto get away-; Ixit as I was going out, 
whom Ihould I meet but that Villain Antonio Maria, who 
feeind to me,by his ha ng-doijXDountenancejto have been 6he • 
of the Fcnir Diabolical fimiflaries. He told me in his whin- 
ing Tone, his Mafter waited for meat the next Church, and 
I anfwer'd, I would .go and wait upon him, but I intended 
nothing kfs. I was no fooner got out of Doors, but 1 made 
all the Iiafte away I could, for fear the fmelling Adventure 
fhould be found out, for which I might very well expeft 
Ibmc new Chaftifement. I was fo battered and brtiis'd all 
over my poor Body,that at another time I believe I could not 
have ftir'd if ybii vvould have given ifac tlie whole World ; 
l)ut now making a Viiltuc of Neceffity, I trotted a^vay in 
fudi Pott-hafte, that one would have tliought I had had 
Wings at my Heels, £b eager I was to get out of this abo- 
minable City* Bear makes a Man do ttrange Tilings ; and I 
was fain to ky Lefes-to Ground pretty handfomely, after the 
great Charity I hai experienced from tncfe worthy Kclat ions- 
All this Friglat, nevcrthelefs, had not taken away my Sto- 
mach, I was as Hungry as ever j wherefore happening to 
pals through a Market, and feeing fome boila Meat that 
look'd well, I bought a little of it* with a large Loaf, and. 
fell to eating as Iwalk'd along the Street,, not knowing 
whither I was going,, or entertaining any Thought about 
it. I did not- ilcTp till I got out of the City, and then 
feeing a Cabaret before me, fwcnt in and drank a Glafs of 
Winic, which you may imagine by this time I had Occafioa 
for. Here I began to feel my Pangs afreih ^ but theAVine, 
which was very good, comforted me under that Affliftion ; 
fo that refuming Courage, after an Hour s Bait, I demanded 
whither that Road Jed ? I wa^ told to Rome ; which taking^ 
for ^ good Omen, I without further delay prepared toy lelf 
to travel forMrard. As I went along, I could not but re* 
flc6t on the Treatment of my treacherous R^lajipp^^ yvh^i I 

C c iwy» 

38^ The Life and ASiim Vm I 

fuppos'd, us'dmc ill, on Account of my mean FiguK, nrfadi 
they fearU would dilhohour them. But I coa^catsd my 
felt with having one Day an Opportunity to Rcven^ my 
ill Ufage on that old Hunks, and make him know wtother 
I was realty the Son of my Father, or not. 

CHAP. n. 

Guzman, in his Journey towards Rome, difcourfes »/ 
' his Tarflmony and good Husbandry j an^ at length 
tells you how, upon his Arrival at his Journeys end, 
he turnd Beggar again ; and what InfiruBions he had 
from an old Troficient, who communicated to him the 
Lcnvs and Ordinances of that fraternity, which he ac- 
t^uaints you with. 

I}ogg'd on leifurcly,becaufe my Bortes had been fb fljafcn 
! 1 durft not, for die prcfcnt efpcdally, put them into a 
more violent Motion. I arrived at length at a Town lo 
Miles from G^^^^j witliout fo much as turning my Head 
once tcfwards tliat City> If tat'^ Wife had done the fime^ 
ihe liad not been changU to a Pillaat of Salt. 1 looked up- 
on my felf now, as one efeap d from the Battle of Ri^mt^ 
i^alles ; but then I was &ilen imo a& great a Misfctftunc, 
which, was not to have a Penny wharmithal to hdp my 
felf, and that in a Country where I undlerfldod ndt a: Word 
of the Language, and yet was travelling fo long a Jouniey 
as that to Rmse, This you muft own. was no fmail Mitter 
to undergo \ yet \ who had been accuftom'd to Misfbr- 
tunes, and taught not to defpair, mads fli^t of &em. 
After I had rclted for two Hours, and fpent the little Mo- 
ney I had left, I refi|zn'd rwy felf entirely into die F&i^ of 
providence, talcing tha (^red Road toi Rsmn as a Filgrim 
in qt^^it of Pardonsy fot which t ha4 niioiie than ocdmai^ 

Poverty, ae IVe already told you, is a lad Thing : If it 
fometi^ies rtiarpens. the Wit, it m<M.i2 filecpiemly Wu^tsit. 
It w^s well for me \ had already been made acquainted 
wiifeitj and-tliatl^a^not akoj^tfecu igaorant i» the- Art- 

, of 

Book III of Guzman d^Alfarachc. 38; 

of Begging^ otherwife I fliould not have known whiat to 
have done. This Juftice muft be done to Italj^ Tliat nd 
Country in the World has more Charity in it. I inci; 
with fo much on the Road, that in all my long journey I 
did notf fpend a Farthing of ithat I got, but nad always 
more than fufficient for my Belly witlwut it. In a Word, 
this Trade charm'd me fo exceedingly, that when I came 
to the famous City, I could not leave it. I had fome 
Temptation towards it I muft coftfefsj for fteing my felf 
have Monev enou^ to buy a new Suit of Cloatjbs, I had a ' 
mind at firtt to employ it that way, with defign to get into 
ibme Nohfcman s Service : but at length I began to cry 
to my fclf ; AhjGMicman I can'tt thou not have Five or Six 
Soufi in thy P&cket^but thou muft prefently refumc thy for-: 
mer Vanity ? Thou haft had old Follies enough, do not 
feck alter new Ones. TiKm art well in Health and Citcum^ 
Aance by the Baiine(s thou haftj VVhat makes thee to de** 
fire more ? Every one becomes Wile one time or other by 
his Experience ; do not thou refift thine. This faid, tte 
Temptation vanKh'd, and I heard no mote of it. I ty'd 
up my Purfe-ftfings with a double Knot i and faying to 
my Money, You inall flay there, if you pleaft,, till I haver 
greater Occafion for you ; it tarried very ^ietly. The 
Cloaths I already have are very proper for myipmplwm*ent ; 
ivere they better, tliey would not be fo well. Since Fortune 
has chaljk'd out tliis Way for me to Felicity, why ihould I 
oppofe her ? I had better be contented^ fmce a worf^ Fatir 
niay loon happen to me. 

I began then to traverfe the Streets c^.Rome^ like a 6egr 
gar of a new Edition, holding open my Hand, and ftrctcfr- 
ing forth my Arm, in fuch manner as I faw the moit SkiJ- 
fnl do befiace me. I formed my felf ui>on their Model ; and^ 
in regard I knew not the Greets lb well as they, I was 
obliged to follow them, and take what they refus'd^ or at 
leaft what ,they left. I at length got acquainted with a 
young Fellow of that Citj) who was well vers d in this 
Trade, and gave me good inftni6tions concerning it. He 
taught me in a trice, after what manner I ft)ou)d oeg of all 
forts of People; and told me, the fame Tone would 
not do always, nor- the iamc Speech* He faid, Men did 
not love a whining Note, but one that beggd an AU^s 
boldly i Wtmeas Womsn^ who fome af tfacb paid th^il 

C c 3 ' Pevotionj 

3 818 The Life and Anions Part I. 

Devotions to tlic Holy Virgin, others to our Lady of the 
^ofany and each in particular as God had infpir' f^thcm for 
his Glory, required Prayers for their Deliverance from Mor- 
tal Sin, Falfc Witncfl'es, the Power of Traytors, and Bad 
Tongues. Thefc fort of Wiihes or Prayers, pronoun^*d 
with a great deal of Vehemency and Whining> makes their 
Purfes immediately fly open, and happy is {he that c^n 
fupply thee firft. He taught me moreover, how to more 
the Compaffion of the Rich, who are ever moft inexorable ; 
and to excite the Charity of Dtvotos^ who are ilot lefs dif- 
ficult to work upon, for they'l freely give you what's 
anothcrs, but part with nothing of their own. In a Word, 
he gave me fo good Inttrudions, that in a Ihort time I got 
a great deal more tlian I could ipend, and was acquainted 
with the w^hole City of Rwkc. 1 knew right well where 
there was any thing to be got 5 but not to trouble my 
Cuftomers t6o often, I refolv*d to obfenrc a Deconm. 1 
divided the City into fevcral Quarters, allotting one for 
each Day in the Week, which I vifitcd conftant!y. As for 
the Churches, they went according to their Hohdays, and 
fet Times of Devotion. It often happen d I got only a 
Piece of Bread ; but then whatever I liad itiorc than I 
could cat, I would be fure to fell, and make Money of. 
There were feme (hame-fac d Beggars that could not ask 
openly, but whofe half-{farv*d Countenances fufficiently 
betraying their Wants, they were certain to be relieved in 
private 5 which was no fooner done, but they would not 
fail to come and lay out their Pence with us, fince wc 
xould aftbrd them better Pennyworths than the Baker. We 
-fold Scraps of Bread alfo to die Country People and others, 
whofe Bufinefs it was to fat Poultry and Hogs 5 but thole I 
that always paid us bell for thisC^ommodity, were your 
Makers of Spice-Cakes. I likewife cot a good deal by old 
Rags; for People feeing me almoft naked, efpecially in 
'Winter, would take pity of me, and give what they could 
fpare. Coming at lait to be acquamted with the mott 
antient Dons of the Faculty, I every Day learn'd how to 
manage Matters better, tor I oblerv'd them narrowly. 
However being one Day at the Ambaflador of Frances 
Door, where there was always a jpublick Dole difpens'd, I 
heard feme of my Comrades behind me cry, See tliat Oaf 
of a SparMrd there, lie knows notliing of the Matter ; hc'l 


Book III. of Guzman d^AIfiirache. 38^ 

certainly fpoil our Trade. When once his Guts are full, 
if any Dody offers him any Thing, herefufcs it. We (hall 
have a fine Fellow-Labourer of him. By thefe means, Peo- 
ple will be apt to think we Begprs * have too much given 
us, and fo withhold tlieir Chanty. One of the old-Stan- 
dcrs hearing him talk thus, and knowing me, began to' 
reprimand them after the following manner. This Bro-' 
ther of ours is a Stranger ; we ought to conGdcr him as* 
fuch, for he can't half know his Trade yet; but let me 
alone with hini, and I'll talk to him ; perhaps I may 
give himfuch Inftruftions as he may be the better for. 
Now you mull know, this was a Doctor in the Art of 
Begging, a very great Proficient; who calling me afidc, 
began "to enquue into my Life, and ask me, Whence I 
came } • How long I had been in Rome i If I had beg'd 
clfewhere ? Or whether I had ferv'd my Apprcntifiiip in 
that City? In ajl which, liaving fatisfied nim^s well as 
I could, he inftruded me very mildly in the Duties that 
Beggars bw'd to each other, and what Decorums they 
ought to obferve. He faid, they were to aflift one ano- 
ther with their Advice, and live like Brothers : And from 
thence he entered into a long Detail^ and taught me fo 
many Tricks and Secrets, as loon gave me to pnderfland 
what a Mafter T had to deal with, and that I my felf 
were yet but a Novice. ^ He taught me to widen my 
Stomach, that I inight eat four times as much as at ano- 
ther time, without incommod'mg my felf. He fliew'd 
me with what Greedincft I fliould eat before People, and 
what deep Bites I were to make in the Bread. He told 
me what Grimaces I ftiould ufe, and what different Tones 
of Voice, according to the different Perfons I ask'd Alms 
of He made me, moreover, acquainted with the Hours 
I were to be at eadi Place ; what Houfes I might enter 
freely, and what fuperficially. and the like. But all tliis 
was nothing in relpeft of tnc Begging-Laws and Ordi- 
nances, which he communicated to me as foou as we came 
to his-Houfe, whitlier he infenfibly drew. me. He ^ve me 
leave to take a Copy of them, that I might ftudy um^l at 

kifurc. They axe as follow. 

' -. . . 

e ^ • • i • 


Cc 3 . L^T^s 

3^0 The Ufe and AHions Part I; 

Laws and OrMnances to be inwolablj ohfervd by dU Beggars* 

P'Oiafmudi as all Nations and Kingdoms have tiipx 
^ differtnt Methods of Begging, whiai they are diftin- 
guilh'd and known by ; as tlic Germans^ by tlieir Sing* 
*^ ing, and going in Companies ; die Frenchyby thdr Pray- 
^* ing • Ac FlemmngSj by their making of Lcgs^and their 
^ low and frequent Cringes ; the Behetnians^ or Gipfies, by 
^ theit Importuning j tiie PmuguefeSy by their Slabbering 
*^ and Crymg ; the Jtalians^hy their long Circumlocutions 5 
^ and the Spaniards ^ by their big hooliSy and lofty Lan- 
'^ guage^ We ftridly En;oyn aiid' Command all Pcrfons, 
^* to whom it (hall in any wife appertaiii, to condudi and 
^^ reform themfeives for the future, purfuant to the follow-^ 
*' ing Ordinances and Statutes. 

^' I. We Will and Command, That none of our Bro- 
" ther-Ro^€s or Beggars, whether Wounded or Lame, of 
^' any Nation or Country focv^r, fliall join at unite ivi^ 
** tliofc of any Kingdom or Sovereignty that ztt Well an4 
^ in Health, to prevent Inconvcniencies that may arifc 
^' thereby, and the Advantages they may havt over one 
^^ another. 

^' IL We Will and Command, That thofc who arc Well 
^^ and in Health, and without any Indilporttion upon 
^' them, do not confort or keep Company with, in any 
*^ manner whatfoever, any Blind Beggars^ Thofc diat fay 
*' Prayers from Door to Door, any Mountebanks^ Pidlers, 
^* Poet«, Slaves fet at Liberty, old Soldiers tliat have eibp'd 
f* out of a Battle or Sie^, Shipwrecked Seamen, or the 
^* like; for altho' iris allowed ui general, that all theft 
<^ muft fubfift by Alms, yet tlie Ways of Begging being 
^^ diderent, each mui\ itick to their particular Rules and 
^^ Orders. 

^* ill. We Will and Comtnand, Tliat the Poor pf every 
f' Nation, efpecialty in their own Countries, have certaul 
?' Inns and Victualling-Houfes affign'd them^ where ftiali 
V prefide Four or more of tlieiir Antij^tt^ vwth Staves in 
^* theij: |^ands as Enllgns of their Authority, tp deter- 
f^ jnine all fuch Differences ajid Difputes as flull happen a- 
P Ippi^g ?li?i^ } and aft?f ^ hayc fo done^^ th^ may fit 
"''■■' - f* over 

Book IIL ef Guzman d'Alfarache. 9^ i 

^' over dicir Cups, s^itd- tell old Stories, boafting of Battels 
J^ they were never id, and Dangers they have never run. 
^ tSf. W^ Will and Command, That every Beggar carry 
a good B^tt or Cudgel in his Hand ; and tliat fuch as 
are able put a good Spike at the end <^ it, that they may 
be arm'd and provided ^gainft all dfualties that may 
^ befall either their Pjurfes or their Perfons. 

^ V. We Will and Command, That no Beggar wear any 
newer tolerable Cloadis whatfoever, but iuchonly as 
fliall be well worn, Patched and Threadbare, for fear of 



^^ bringing Scandal upon the Profeffion : Provided alwaj^s, 
^ in cale any new Cloak or Coat has been given by way or 
** Alms, then fuch Perfon, to whom it was given, inall 
*^ have liberty to wear it for Aat Day, and no longer, un- . 
** der pain ot our high Difpjeafure, and his own parti- 
** cular Hindrance. • 

^ VI. We Will m4 Command, That in cafe of Prece- 
*^ dency, each iliall take Place Secundum Antiijuitatem Pojfef- 
fionis^ and not Perfona, according to his Standing, and 
not nis Years. 

^ VII. We Witt and Command, That two Sick or Lame 
Perlbns do keep together, and call each other Brothers ; 
but widi this Conaition, Ttiat they beg by Turns, and 
ftniin their Voices in different Manners, the one ftill be- 
ginning where the other leaves cA', and both obfcrvi^g 
egual Time and Meafurc. They are to keep each to a 
^* diffctcnt fide of the Street, and not to ufe any artificial 
^ Phra^, "Or af&fted Forms, to fet off their Aihnents, but 
^ todi^ay them as naturally and fignificantlv as they 
can, 10 as they may be plainly undcrffood : When this is 
done, they may divide the Booty at pleafure, and no 
Account mall be required of them. 

VIII. We Will and Command, That no Beggar carry 
about him any Arms, eitlier Offcnlive or Defenfive, other 

^ than fuch as we have permitted, unlels it be a lihall 
** Knift to dolt liis Vi6hials with. He is likewife to wear 
'* no Gloves, Pantofles, nor Spectacles, nor to have his 
** Stockings rolW or garter'd, or to have any thing elfe 
" that may look neat about him, under pain of our high 
" Difplealure. 

IX. We Will and <!:ommand, That all pretended fick 



Becgars wear a Clout abcmt iheit Hc^fJs, inttcad o[ a 
"^ '' Cc 4 [' Boiincij 

59 2 The Life and Anions Part X 

'* Bcnnct; and that thcy, as welt as all others, be per- 
*^ mitted to carry with them a pair of old Sizzars, an Awl, 
" a Needle and Thread, a Thimble, » wooden Difti, a 
*^ Cio%rd^ a little Hand-basket, and a Scrip* or Wallet. 
" They ihall likewifc hare liberty to walk with two 
*^ Crutches, and have a Well-Leg ty'd up upon a 

^' X. We Will and Command, That all Beggars carry 
" two Purfes about with tliem, one little^ and another 
*' great ; but that they receive their Ahng in their Hats. 
*' We forbid them to make a Pouch or Budget, either in 
" their Cloak, Coat, Frock, G^t/t r//i»f , . Caffock, or Adan- 
^^ dillm^uvon pain and Forfeiture of all that fliall be found 
*^ about tncm, and upon being moreover looked upon as 
*^ Coxcombs. 

"XI. We Will and Command^ That no Beggar what- 
; focverdifcovcr, reveal, <h: divulge the. Myfterics, Subtle- 
" tics, and Secrets of his Trade, unleft it be to one of the 
fame Society or Profcflion. 

" XII. We Will and Command, Thalt any one who has 
*' invented or found out any new Trick or Device in the 
** Art of Begging, Ihall be oblig'd to communicate the 
" fame to his Fraternity within the fpace of one Month, 
*^ that the Publick may benefit by it ; and in cafe he docs 
" io Communicate, ne fhall have the folc Privilege of 
'^ pradifing it fpr Three Months, as a Reward for his In- 
*^ vention ; and no Body lliall prefumc to interfere with 
" him in it without his Leave, unlefs he has a mind to for- 
" fcit all he fliall cet by it to thcPerfon he has fowxongU 
. "' XIII. We Will and Command, That all Begears ihall 
^' dilcover. and make known to each other, all Houfes 
" where tnere are any Alms to be ^had, efpecially fnch 
*' where there is either Gaming or Courting; for thofe 
^' Places leldom fail pf bringing in good Rents. 

^\ Xl V. We Will and Command, That no Beggar, un- 
" det pain of our heavy I)ifpleai'ure, keep any nunting, 
" Setting, or Qpn-Dogs, and but pnly <?ne Mungrel-Cur; 
" which neverthelels is permitted to fione but Bliu4-Men, 

*^ to conduct them along witfi a Haider apd Bell about his 

*' Neck. 

*' XV* We Will and Command, ThatiiDn? that carry a 
*; Po^ about' witji tl^qp, -to jnak^ hjn^^ dance or jump 

^ tlirough 

Book III. (/ Guzman d'Alfarachc. 3^5 

through a Hoop, fhall have any Station at a Church- 
Door, or other Place, where B^igars.arc us'd to be aP- 
fembled, for fear of interrupting otibers in their Calling. 
" XVI. We Will and Command, Tliat no Beggar pre- 
fume to come to . the Shambles or Fifli-Market to ouy 
either Fielh or Fi(h, except in Cafes of extream Neceffity, 
by reafon of the ill Confequences may arife from fo doing. 
'^ XVII. Wc Will and Command, That none that Dance, 
Sing, or Play on any Inftrument, to get Alms, fhall 
contort or keep company with any other Becgars,. but 
have their Stations apart, under pain of our mgh Dif^ 

*^ XVIII. We Licence and Permit all fuch Beggars, as arc 
fo dilpos'd to. have borrowed Children, to the number 
of Four, but hot above, their Ages being firft examined ; 
. and in cafe they take Twins, the Elder mutt be above 
Five Years old. The Woman that goes about with thefc 
Children, muft have one fucking at her Breaft, and lead 
the others in her Hands ; and as for a Man, he mutt 
carry one in^his Arms, and lead the other, and not other- 

" XIX. We Will and Command, That thofe Beggars, 
who have any Children, teach them to lie at Church- 
Doors, or any fuch-^likc Places of publick Refort, there 
to take notice of who comes in, and who goes out 5 of 
whom it (hall be lawful for them to beg an Alms for 
their poor Fathers or Mothers that lie fick and weajc, or 
keep their Beds and have nothing to help themfelvcs 

*^ vfithal ; or elfe, that have Four or Five finall Children 

^^ that are ready to ftarve for want of Bread : Provided al- 
ways. That this Liberty extend not to Children that are 
above Six Years of Age ; for when once they exceed that, 
they arc to ftiift for tliemfelVes like fledg*d Birds, and, 
li^e Whelps that are fit to be entered, nole out tlieir 
Living, and bring home their Prey at convenient Hours. 

*^ that their I^rents may fee what tliev are able to do. 

XX. We Will and Command, That no Beggar fuffer 
his or her Children to be bound Apprentice to any Trade 
but their own Profeffion ; for therein they will greatly 
oflfcndjby not following the Foottteps of their Foreiathers, 
and running a Courfe quite contrary to that laudable 

«« Way wherem they have been bred. 

'-' XXI. We 









5^4 T%e Life and ASliom Part L 

^ XXI. We Will and Command^ Hut no B^ar be 
^ within his Bed, or in his Lodging, at Seven a CSodc in 
^^ a yVimn% Morning, or at Five in the Smumtr^ but be 
^ out by Sun-rifing, or fooner if poflible, to lee wbt 
*' Fvrdme he can make j and then to be in again by Sun- 
'' ftc, or before, unlefs in extraordinary Cafo, and accord- 
im to the DuK6iiom of liis Superiors. 
^XXn. Wc WUl and Command, That no Beggar, ex- 
^ cepc fuch as ^e Sick and Weak, break&lt upon any 
^ tfamg but what he gets that Ehy^ for otherwii^ the 
^' Stocac would be diminifh'd, and the Princijnl be im- 
paired. They are likcwife oblig*d to walli their Moutb 
oefore they eat, and not to carry Onions or Garlick a- 
bout in their Hands, as is but too cuftomary to do. 
* XXin. We Will and Command, That no Bcgmr 

Eitfiune to play the Impoftc^ commit any grofs ^^• 
my, deal H<xi(hold*Stuff, help to convey it awajr, 
^ untife Houfcs, ftrip Children, or do any the like txde 
^ A6)ion, upon pain of being excluded from our Brodicr- 
^ hood« and ddiver'd over to the Secular Bower. 

^ Laftly, Our Will and Pleafure is. That every B^r, 
" when he fliall be of fiill Age, that is, Fiftem mrs 
•* oM, Ihall be no longer deenrd a Novic^ but be held, 
V" allowVl and efteem'd, as a Perfon ihat has ftUfilfd die 
Law, and comply'd with this Institution ; and although 
Two Years more be reguir'd to render him compleat, 
yet he flhall be now rcoeir d for a Graduate : And having 
thus given Proof of his Ability and Parts, we firsf^Iy 
Enjoyn and Order, That he hold and enjoy all the 
*' Liberties, Excmi)tions and Privileges, bv us or cur An- 
^ c^ors at any Time granted ; but wida this Condition, 
" That he neither ftiall now,nor at any time,for(ake our Ser- 
** vice, without our efpeclai Leave firft had and obtained \ 
^* and that, in the mean time, he ilhew fudiSubmiffien and 
f* Obedience to our Laws and Ordinances, as they rctjuirc 
?^ of him upder the Penalties before Q)ecify4. 


C H A P. 

Book III. of Guzman d'AI£irach& 3^5 


Guzman ttlU you of fame new Laws he learn d^ and 
how he was J ew* a for begging at an unjeafonable Hoat^ 
and afterwards laugh' d at by an <dd Proficienty n/ho 
infirtiUtd him better : Then he acquaints you with the 
daily VraBifes and Exercift both <f himfislf ^nd his 
Companions, whereby they got whevewithat to Ri^e^ not 
only plentifully^ but luxurioujly, 

IThank'd this good Man for all his Kindneflfes, Init mote 
efpccially for communicatitig to me tbefe Laws and Or- 
dinan^, which I promised to observe inviolably. Over 
and above thefe, there were fevcral others handed down to 
Poflerity by Traditi<Mi, and which the Itdian Beggars had 
eftaWifti'd from time to time, according as Engenccs re* 
quit d. Ttic chief of thefe, and nioft cBcem^d, were thofc 
coftipird by one Alhertiy call'd in Raillery, Afefer Abr^on^ 
who was look'd upon as Generaiiffimo of the Beg^isin Rome. 
In truth, he deferv*d to govern their Empire, inaimuch as 
he was better made, better bred, and more truly m3alify'4 
for his Poft, tlian any of his Predeccffors. He might well 
be ftil'd, The Prince rf Idlenefs and Cowardice, and Arch-* 
Beggar of all Chrifiendom. He would devour you at one 
Meal all. the Tripes and Entrails of two good Sheep, toge- 
tlier with the Puddings made out of diem, and the T'rottcnj 
and Headi8. With thefe, he eat Ten Pounds of Bread, and 
draftk in proportion. He would alone fcrape up as much 
Orts as Ten others ; b^t which he had Occafion ibr, being 
able, as IVe already told you, to eat asmudiasTchj anq 
then for the Monjy he got, that was rcferv^d wholty for 
•drinking. He made fo (hort wt>rk with every Thing, tha^; 
iiis Sub^^ or Vaflals were fain to fupply Iris Occafion^ 
when he wanted, and which they aiwaj^ did "with a great 
deal of Pleafurc and Satisfa6Hon. You never law him fa- 
tiafy'd cither witli Wine or Vi6tuals. He ahvays went 
both Sununer and Winter c^en-brcaltcd, nor erer had fq 
mudi as a Shirt or Stocking on. His Head was fikewifa 
always bare 5 apd to lee how his wiutc Sfan Ihin d, 
' you 


5P^ The Life and AUims P^rt I. 

you would have Sworn he had rubb'd it with Hogs- 
This fiimous Mefftr Morton oifdain d, during his Reign, 

** I. That every Beggar (hould carry about him a wooden 
" Difh, or dry'd Pumpkin, but fo that they might not be 
** feen. 

" II: That no Beggar fliould draw Water in a Pitcher^ 
*^ or drink out of any Pot ; but for that end fliould make 
^ ufe of a brood Tub, an Earthen Tar, or the like, whcrc- 
^ in he ihould thruft his He^d, and drink after the manner 
" of a Beaft. 

" III. That he that (hould not drink a found Drau^ght 
^^ after his Sallet, (hould be rendered incapable of drinkuig 
*^ afterwards during his whole Repaft. 

" IV. That no Beggar ihould buy or eat any Comfits, 
" Conferves, or the like fwect Things. 

" V. That every one fhould cat Salt or Pepper with his 

Meat, providing it had not been well feafon d before. 

*^ VI. That your poor Rogues fhould be bound to flccp 

upon the Ground, without either Pillow or Bolfier, and 

Iving upon their Backs with their Faces upwards. 

*^ VII. That haying got fufficient wherewithal to Ipend, 

he fhould go no more a Begging that Day, but leave 

others to Glean where he left off. 

^^ VIII. That no Body fhould take Care for to Morrow, 
' it being a Beggars particular Happineis to depend entirely 

upon Providence. 

Tliere were many more Articles of the fame kind, which 
I have not room to iiifert. This Prince of Beggars always 
cat lying, lazyin^ along, and would ever, both Winttr and 
Summer y fleep without any Covering. I had almoft got all 
his Laws by Heart j but I neverthelefs took notice only of 
fuch as were radft confiderable, and related to good Govern- 
ment, which I were as fond ofl a^ if mv Fortune or Sal- 
vation had d^cnded on them. Notwithftanding, as I had 
not had anylong Experience of this Tra4e, and new Diffi- 
culties daily offer d, I did not fail to be oftentimes much 
embar^afs'd, efpecially when my Ambition drove me upon 
jiiaking new Experiments, which I vyere but too apt to da 
ypon a Holiday^ about the beginning of Sepumbety tpr 
; , . wards 



Book III. of Guzman d'Alfarache. 5^7 

wards Ghc of the Clock in the Aftcrnaon, I happened to 
go forth during the great Heats, imagining that whofo- 
cycr fliould fee W beg at that time of Day, would imme- 
diately relieve me, as "thinking I had more than ordinary 
WantjOrl would never go abroad while my Comrades were 
fsiil in their Hutches But I did not find Matters fucceed 
as I exped^ed ; for after having ranged over the two moft 
famous Quarters of the City, without gaining any thing but 
Injuries and Repulfcs, I came at length to a Place, whcri 
an unlucky Wench feeing me begging at that unfeafonablc 
Hour, made no more ado, but without any other warning 
than ^gua vi, guardate debaxo ^ Ware Waur^ Looi to your 
filves ham there 5 pour'd down a Cauldron of boiling Water 
on my Head, which fhe took care I ftiould not be able to* 
avoid. Never was Man fo jfcalded and frighted as I was ; 
I began to cry out as loud as I could baul. Every Body, 
gathered about me ,• fome blam'd me, «nd fome the Maid.; 
Everyone however pitied'mej and fome there were that- 
gave me their Charity, but to little purpofe fince I were 
under fo great Pain. I muft neverthelefs have Patience,*- 
and bear air as well as I could. I went homewards, and 
by the way laid to my felf,Dyelee now what your fine Ex- 
periments come to ? You have always fome notable Fancy 
or other in your Head. You have richly deferv'd whaC 
you luvefiifrcr'd, and I don't at all pity you : You 1 learn to* 
be wifer I hope another time. Thy Mains Gemus tempted' 
thee, poor Gtu^man, and thouhadft a mind to be knowing 
more man was convenient for thee to know, and thou haft 
paid for it with a Vengeance. If thou' wouldft know yet 
more, thou muft return to the lame Plac^e, and thou wilt 
no doubt be further inftrufted. Whilft I was thus reafon- 
ning with my felf, I were got almoft to,my Lodging. As 
I came near, the>good old. Comrade with whom 1 once 
lodged, caird to me, and feeine me in that Pickle, and a 
little melancholy, ask'd from, whence I came, and whether 
I had been bathmg in a Hog-Tub, becaufe I fmelt fo of 
GreajTe ? Entring his Cellar, and fitting down upon an old, 
broken Form, 1 began, to relate to him my whole Adveii- 
iure. He lau^U heartily at it, and faid, I am very much 
afraid^ Gm;man^ thou art but indifferently qualify'd for this 
.new Employment. Thou wilt needs pretend to be Old-Dog 
at it, and, yet thou feem'ft to me to be but ^ meer Novice. 


3p8 The Ufe and ASHons Part I. 

Novr you mnft know this i/^ an otd CordtmafK a great 

Proficient in Begging. He was both born and orcd to it, 

and refolvtd to die in it^ and for Countries fake bad a great 

Friendftiip for me, tlierefore would needs upon this 0:ca- 

fion flive me ail the necei&ry Advice he could* He told 

me tli^n^ it was a Cuftom in Romt to give no Ahns after 

Dinner, particularly among Perfons of Qtiality^ who 

took tlut Time to fleep, and did not care to be wak'd, eipe- 

cially by a poor Beggar ; Tiut after one had ho^vl'd once or 

twice at a Door, and feen no Body come, it was a fien ei-^ 

ther no Body was in tlie Houjfe) or that no Body &d a 

mind to be uiere, and therefore the beft way weie to be 

gpne, and not to lofe ones Timie ; That whenever one found 

a Door (hut^ one ought not to c^n it for fear of Dogs, 

who are natural Eneimies to B^^rs, or of difpkafing the 

People of the Houfe, who might not caie to have theii* 

Ptivades pry'd intoi)y fuch Perlbns as us. But that which 

he taught me, which was moft curious, was aSecret to raife 

a Leprofie and Ulcers. He informed me likewife how to 

itvike my Foot or Leg fwell, to become pale and wan in a 

Ktoment, to disfigure my whote Body, and, in a word, to 

da many other neccdary and important Tricks whic^ he 

had learn d from hid Father, wko had in like manner been 

a Maftex in his ProfefTion. He totd me,he would conceal no^ 

tlu^g from me that related to this Art, becaufc he faw a 

land of towardiy Difpofition in me to come to fomething 

in time; bui. nerceiving 1 had a mind to go and change 

my Cloaths, wnich were exceeding wet and nafty, he dil- 

mifs'd me ; yet iiwitcd me to come and foe him iometimes^ 

and afTur'd me I would not Hud my Labour loft. I tbank'd 

him very kindly for his Favour^ highly perfuaded that what 

lue fiiid tvas ttf ue, and fb return d to my Lodging. 

. We oftentimes met togetlicr feveral of us to piadtft 

Qur Parts, and try wliat Bcclama/tions wculd fuit us beft, 

and be likely to turn moli to Account. This was our 

chiefeii Exfsraii& an^igfits ; and diere were fome amonj; us 

ifaat would ita^ent Rew Forms and Metliods of BenediCcion, 

iyl^ida they f^d to its, a>id get good LiveHhoods by. And 

all you^l fay was li^tljc eneu^i, and no more than needed, 

to move MeitL^s Mkds, atfiid ftir them ut)'to Con^don. 

On FciJiv^l-Days we would be up Dctsanes, and nin to 
ajt Pto:^ yfh^m Pardons and InduigencGs wert fiirringf 


Sook III. of Guzman d'Alfarachc.^ 3j^p 

hat TTC might provide our fdvcs widi gcxDd Pofts, and get 
Ls near as we could to the HolyrWdtery or the Chapel where " 
:he Heavenly Ware was given out. Towards Night wc 
ivoi>Id make an Excurfion into the neighbouring Villages, 
md not leave one unvifited. whence we ^ould always re- 
tuirn laden with Booty. ' When we law any Perfon of Di- 
[^in<SI:ion coming towards us, we would immediately haul 
out for Qiarity Dcfore he came near, that be might have 
time to put his Hand in his Pocket; £ac manv timesPeofde 
■would not flop if we accofted them only jnSx as they cami^ 
to us. At other times, when we were to accoft a Com- 
pany of People together, if we had but Time to prepare for; 
itj we would every one aft a diflferent Part. One would 
Halt as if he were Lame, another carry his Arm in a Sling, 
a third twift and quiver with his Lips as if he had the Pal- 
fie, a fourth turn up his Eyes as if he were uiKler the 
greateft Afl3i6Hon, a fifth would be carried upon his Com- 
rades Shoulders as if he had loft the ufc of his limbs, a 
iixth would diftprt his Legs as if he were Ricketty, a fe- 
venth counterfeit Dumbnefs, an eighth BHndnefs, a ninth 
ivould tie his Legs upon two Stilts ; and, in a word, every 
one, tlio' vft were never fo many, would appear in a ()iR 
ferent Pofture^ each chufing that which he uoderArod b&ft; 
We always 1^ thofe go firit that were the moft dsilfui in 
their Profeffion, that' they might prepare the Way for the" 
reft, and move the People to Cnarity. If you had. buc 
heajpd the various Benedidtioos we ga^, and the Ptayets we 
iHadq for their Profperity, you would have wondcr'd. 
Sonde wc would wifh ^ood Fortune, pray that God vcoiald 
deliver others from their Enemies, accompliOl the DeCresr 
of a third fort, give a fourth Children, bids a fifth with 
good Trade, prfcferve the Health, and efpccialiy the Sight 
of a &sdiy and fhovver down on a ieventb all matmet of 
Felicity. Thefe, and a thoufand fuch-like ExpreffiOBs we 
had, which were always worth us ready Money* ^^ called 
this a fort of going to War, bccaiife we praAis'd it in the 
Country, and went in Troops. We wers nercr better 
pleased than when we heard of a Treat or Fcift, whithwi. 
wc would be fuse to come, but that in finall Nuithets, 
for fear of out-numbring the Guefts, which in S^» is^ 
look*d upon of unluckyCoiifequcnce, God kmnvs how 
we made up our Mouths here, for we. never &U'4 to. go. 


400 The Life and ASlioKS Part I. 

laden away. We fa;ad admirable Nofes to finell out proper 
Places, and your Houfcs with Pone^cheres were fure to 
have enough of our Company. Whether the Hotel belonged 
to a Cardinal, Ambai&dor, or other great Man^ it mattered 
not; if we could but expeCl the Icatt welcome, we would 
be certain to vifit it. By tliefe Means, tho' w^c had nothing 
of our own, we were Matters of every Thing, and pof- 
feis'd even fome Superfluities tliat wc liad no manner of 
Qccafion for, which made us live> not only plentifull}', 
but luxurioufly. 


C H A R IV. 

Gtizman Difcourfis of Charity^ and the many Benefits of 
it. Then he tells-, how he came to he relie'ud hy a cer- 
tain Nohleman^ ;who thought hisA£t meritorious. After- 
. Tvards he proceeds tojhew what a free Life and Liberty 
a. Beggar enjoys, 

/^"AN E fure and certain fign of our Predcftination. is the 
V^ Pity and Compariion we have for our Neignbours 
Warns 5 for he chat can have a fellow-feeling of another's 
Milcry, muft needs be dcfign d for Good liiiniclf. Charity 
covers a multitude of Sins, and where there is Love, there 
is God. The Almighty ever dwells in thofe Hearts where 
Charity and Mercy abound. Neither the Gift of Prophe- 
cy, die Underftanding of Myfteries, the Kxiowledge of (jod, 
nor Faith it felf, canliibfift without Charity. To love my 
Neighbour as my felf, is the greatcft and.moft perfctft of 
Sacrifices, becaufe it is offer a up in the Temple of the 
Living Grod. He that fhall be charitable jo others, . ihall be 
fure to find, the Lord mercifiil to him at the laft Daj'. 
As we merit noticing of our felves at the Hands of God, 
and as Charity is the Gift of Heaven, we ought to beg it 
on our Knees, to moiften the Drought of our Souls, and 
mollifie the Hardnefs of bur Hearts. 

Riches being fo nearly ally d as they are to Pride, tlicy 
arc oftentimes the Occafion of all Ibrts of Vicjs, and weak- 
en and enervate our Virtue. They are a Precipice to iheir 
•_ Owners, a Tyrannizing Lord, andaTraiterousSlavc. They 


BookllL of Glizmatl d'Alfarache^ 401 

arc alfo of die Nature of Sugar, which being (Vircet iand 
pleafant, heats when eaten With hot Things, and cools 
tvhcn eaten with cold. They are to thefn that nave tl:ein a 
ineans to Purchafc eternal Happincfs with, and that by 
Charity. One that is really Rich, may become Poor by 
comforting and relieving the Afflidted ; but he Ihall by no 
Incans lofc his JReward. 

I flood one Day at the Gate of a Cardinars Palace, muf- 
fled dp in a Cloak of fo many Colours, that you could not 
well tell which ?t was originally of; but^ as bad as it Was, 
it defended me ftom the Wet, and that was all 1 required of 
it. As I wafe thus ftanding, a certain Nobleman^ who was 
coming to make a Vifit to his Eminence^ chanced to fpy me, 
who leeing me in that Condition, verily thought I was ei- 
ther Sick, or had an Ague. The Truth was, I had waited 
all that Night at that Gate in hopes of ibme good Fortune, 
end jfinding my ielf cold in the Morning, which I might 
very well be, it being Winter, I had thruft myNofe wim- 
in my Cloak to warm it. This Lord, taking Pity of me,^ 
ftop*d, and caird to me. I having drawn my Phyz out ot* 
its Neft, and feeing a Perfon of Quality fo near me, b^n 
to be muchfurpris'd. He looking earnettly at me, I bluih* d, 
which confirm'd him in his Thought, that I was miferablc. 
He hid me wrap my felf up as before, telling me, he plain- 
ly faw I was not well. At the fame inrant, ne put ^s 
Hand in his Pockety and pulling forth a handml or Silver^ 
ir^vc^ it me, which furpns*d me yet more than at fir(£ 
iHfaving fo done, be went from me, lifting up his EycF^ 
and feeming to thank God that he had an Opportunity to 
do fo great an atft of Charity. Nay, perhaps, ne thus tea- 
fon*d with himfelf : Tho* I am of no better Make tlian 
this youne Man, nor it may be of .bettet Parcitage, I flecj^ 
in a good Bed while he wakes, and am {helter*d firom 
die Wind and Weather whilft he is ciqx>s*d to both : I 
am well cloathU while he is almoft naked ; and while I 
am plentifully fed, he. perhaps, is half-ftarv*d : I am in 
Health, while he is Sick : I am well received, while he i) 
flighted : And whereas thoti might'ft, O Lord, have de- 
graded me, and put me in his Place, thou haft exalted me, 
and made me able to relieve him* Why (hould I not then 
do it ? I fhould be the worft of Men if I negleded it ; I mufl 
tctum part of wfeit thou haft fo liberally bcftow'd m. mti 
*^ P d I 

402 The Life and ASiiOns . Parti. 

I am happy, I am eafie^ I am blefs*d, I am fadsfy'd^ and tfac 

. For my part, I think this Nobleman was much in the 
right, to do Good when it was in his Power. Such good 
Men as. he arc in a fair way to eain Heaven by our Means, 
wliilft we like Wretches lofe it by the fame Method. We 
are [till craving and begging, tho many times we are in no 
Want ; and by that means often rob, as it were, thafe that 
are under Neceflity, by depriving them of what they fliould 
only have. They can follow no other way to get their 
Livelihoods, while it is in our Power to purfue another 
Courfe for Subfiftence. But there are Rogues of all Trad^, 
and Roguery in all Tilings. The wicked Difpofition of 
Man corrupts every thing, and there is nothing good in the 
World but is aflfedled witn it more or lefs. We are flill full- 
gorged, and greater Gluttons and Drunkards the World 
cannot afford ; our Bellies were ready to burft with Gor- 
mandizing, and our Brains to flame with Bowzing* Your 
Senators of Rome could not live more Merrily than we did ; 
for we were aiB good Trencher-men and Piteher-nMn as the 
beft of them. And altho* we are not fo much refpeded, 
nor live in that Repute and Efkemas diey did 5 yet I will 
be bold to aver, our manner of living has a great deal 
more Eafe in it, and lefs Trouble. 

VVe have Two fuch Privileges,tliat Rme in the moft flou- 
riiliing Eltate of its RcpublicK never had the like. One is, 
that .we have a Right to Ask and Receive, witliout any 
manner of Sliame orConfufion, which nootlier Condition 
of Life can boafl. Nothing is more grating, tlian to be o- 
blig'd to ask even of one's own Brother, tho' one is fure not 
to be denied ,• becaule he that asks, always buys very dear 
, what is gi^n him 5 and he tliat gives, for the moft part fells 
. it dear enough too. A poor Beggar is not fenfible of this : 
He has every thing given him without Trouble, and he re- 
ceives it without Pain. If there be any that have the like 
Privileges with us Beggars, it muftbe Sovereign Princes, 
who ask Alms of their Subjefts without Confunon j and 
they for the moft part give them without any good Will. 
The difterence however lies here ; That what they have from 
the Publick,they in a manner Extort from fuch as are poorer 
•tlian themfelves, while we ask only of the Rich, and thole 
that can well afibrd to give us a Benevolence. The other 
, Privilege 

BookllL 0/ Guzman d'Alfarache. 403. 

Privilege weBcgg^irs enjoy, is, That we c^n taftc all tbe 
Pleafures of Life,without fear of being ca|rd to Account for 
them ; nay, with greater Freedom; Tranquility and Relliili^ 
than any other fort of People wbatfoevcr. tho' in never {6 
good Qrcumftances. For nrft, What Feall is there whither 
we don t come without inviting ? And wh^t Ragout fit ni&i. 
t)ilh, which we do not dip a Finger in ? A Beggar pjrefently 
finds out all the good Houfes, and no Perfon knows fo well 
\vhcTt there are the bcft Cooks. As for the knowledge o£ 
what paffes in the World, no Body has fo good Intelligence 
as we Beggars, who go every where, hear every thing, and 
fee all. Nothing is hid from us : We are look'd lipon as 
infignificant and difinteretted Perfons, and therefore no Se-* 
cret is kept from us. Nothing of Importance can pa(s,either 
without Doors or within, but what we foon hear, and arc 
able to make a faithful Relation of. But if we may thus 
hear all withoiit offending any Body, we may likewif? lee 
all without giving any Body the leaft Difturbancc How 
many fine Women have I ftar*d upon in the thurcheSj an4 
elfewhere^ whom their Lovers durft not fo much as lift an 
Eye towards ? How many Things have I feen, that I il^ll 
take no Notice of here for fear of going too &r^ and which 
have been aded with Indifference^ becdufe^twas pnly a Beg- 
gar that law them? But fome ther^ are, who believe a Beg- 
gar can liave nothing to do with. Love ; but tbey are nu- 
ftaken ; for without diving far into Hiflory, I can bring 
many Examples to the contrary. I could, name fome Beg- 
gars of my Acquaintance if 1 pleas'd, who, in Matters of 
this kind, liaye had Favours ehougli from the fair Sex, to 
make the Rich'blufh with Envy aiijd Madnels ; but I have 
better Things to entertain you with. All t would dcfir? 
you to believe, , is^ That Poverty and Love are not jncoiur 

fatible.. The Poor fbmetimes have liad as good Fortune iia 
.ove-AfFairs as the Rich, and oftentimes at the Expcnce d( 
the Jkich ; but this is a MyHery every Body canned pen©-* 
irate. There are fome Beggars, who, for all their Tattsf^ 
and Patches, will be fooner' received intp certain Placcf, 
than the greateft Lord with all his Gold and Equipage; 
and there arc lonie Women will put greater Confidence int 
ihe Dilcretion of a Beggar, who knows how to manage a a 
jAmoHT^ than in the Levity ot a rich Man, who can rjcvef 
be at "relttill he has ruin a her that granted him the favour. 

Dd 3 JHk)W 

404 The Life and Anions Part I. 

Now many Ladies have taken a Plcafuie in giving me Alms 
■with their own Hands ? I know not how other Beggars 
have fer'd, for thcfc arc Myfterics arc not rcveal*d even a- 
mongft us ; but for my own part, I can fefely aver^ That 
having taken many a Lady by the Hand, I have kii^ it 
heartily, and (he has not been difpleasVl at my Prcfomption. 
I was I oung, and it may be that vras the QccaficMti of it. 
But all this is nothing in rcfpeftof what I could tell you, 
if this were a proper Place for it. In truth, what gave us 
the greateft Plcafurc, was the fight of what we got of our 
own, and wbidi was a more fuoftantial Satis6i66on to us, 
than to fee nfevcr fo much of another Bodies. In dS^^ we 
were richer than they ; for what they had, was kept for the 
ufe of other People, to maintain their Houfes. and pay their 
DeMs; whereas ours was purely enjoyed by our ft Ives. 
We ow*d nothing, and therefore had nothing to pay : We 
Were ferv*d by no Body, and confequently had no Body to 
maintain. Our fmall Trcafure was div*d into by nonebut 
our own Hands ; and we were ever lb Cautious as to carry 
our whole Stock about us, fometimes few'd up in one cor- 
ner of our Rags, and fometimes in another 5 bi^t there was 
always more than liifficicnt to buy a new Coat. Every 
Nidit we went to Bed, we could fay we flept upon Gold 
and Silver ; and we could not rail at length to grow 
rich, for wf (pent little or nothing, and were always a get- 
ting. What IS moft true, is. That feme among us, cQjeci- 
ally the old Dons, had heap'd up fuch Hoards, as would 
have fuffic'd any other People to have liv*d contentedly all 
their Days, vsithout any more Trouble ; but fuch is the 
fleafure of Scraping, that a Man cannot eafily get rid of it, 
cTpecially Beggars, who ate generally more Covetous than 
other Folks. They would have other People liberal, btit 
they will be poor-lpiritcd and niggardly themfel ves. I wi 11 
give you an Inifance of Three Qualities belon^ng to us 
Beggars, in one of our Brotherhood who has made a great 
Noilc in the World, and may pafs for one of the moft fe^ 
mous among us. 


Book III. 0/ Guzman d^Alfarache- 405 

c H A p. V. 


Guzman tells a firange Story of one of his 'ProfeJJiony and 
then proceeds to cry up a Beggars Life in oppojition to all 
others. At length he acquaints you^ how he wa^fervd at 
G^Qtafor counterfeiting, 

JT is a very common and natural Thing for all forte of 
"■' poor People to be induftrious, and ftrive Night and Day 
to deliver themfeives from the Mifery they are under ; but 
ta make uG^ of Knavery, Villany, and even Cruelty for 
that'EncL is a little too much. This is, neverthelefi, what 
may be Icen pradtis'd every Day with us Beggars, cfpecially 
the Italians ; among whom, tne Genoefes are reput^ to be 
the moft Gruel and moft Covetous. This, fome will tell 
you, is the Reafon they have had the Name of White Moors 
given them, but I have heard other Rcafons which feem*d 
more juft, with which, however, I will not trouble you, 
that I may not be eternally amufing you with Trifles, tho*, 
to fiy Truth, thefe are not altogether fa However it be, 
he that I am about to tell you this furpriling Story of^ was 
Son to a Genoefiy and Native of a Village not far from the 
City of Genoa. He was a Perfon thcaroughly cndud widi 
thofe Qualities that are commonly attributed to the Genoefes, 
and one, whofe Wit was not always cmploy'd in doing 
Good. Hb Name was Pantdon CajiellettOy a Be^r by pro- 
feflion, who married at Florence^ and had one 5on by his 
Wife, who was no fooner born than his Father thought of 
a Way to procwe him a fulficient Livelihood, without obli- 
ging hiiQ to Work. The Proverb in that Country ftys. 
That Son is truly happy, whofe Father gou to the Devil j but for 
iny part I thin^ him moft unhappy, it l?eing next to Im^ 
poffible that ill-got Wealth fliould defcend to the third Heir, 
I have known leveral Eiimples of this my fclf^ and this 
was one, as you will find by what follows. 

CafieBetto thus married to a Woman of his Profeflion, for 
you never knew a Beggar care to matdi with any other, an4 
having a Child by her, whom he might very well have 
inaintai}^*4 Qjg; qf wliat he had already got^ and got daily, 

Pd ^ • .wa? 


40^ The Life and AHions Parti. 

IJI^as not ncvcrthclefs contented therewith, nor would truft 
"is Son to Fortune on that account. He rather chofeto 
have recourfe, for his Advancement, to one of the moft un- 
natural and unheard-of Barbarities that ever entered into the 
Heart of Mail. This was, to maim and cripple his Son ia 
all his Members, which was, however, but too common 
for Beggars of all Naftions to do in fomemeafure; who, 
when they had a mind to excite and raife Pity in any Paf- 
fengers or Standers-by, have been accuftoma to dillocate 
and break the Bones of their young and tender In&nts, 
thereby rendering them Mpnftrous, and confcquently Ob- 
jects of Charity. But our ^e;zPfji had a mind to excellall 
others in Cruelty, and give his Son fuch a diftorted Form 
^s had never been fpen before. Now you milft know this 
wras nbtthe Work of a Day, but of niany Months, nay of 
Ibme Years; fpr whilft he was growing, by means of Ban- 
jiages, and fometimes hot Water, he hindered the; Members 
from having tlii^ir due "Nourifliment, till fuel; time as the 
Body was brought to the Figure I am going td reprefcnt. 
As for hi» Mind, wjiiqh tliis Villain of i Father could not 
touch, he had naturally a great^deal of Wit. fpokc well, 
and to the Purpofe ; but for his Perfon, which this un- 
natural Dog had an entire Difpolal over, he rendered it fo 
ideform'd and frightful, that nothing could be more dis-^ 
£gyrU To begin with his Head, it had been fo wrting a- 
bout, that it ajmoft Itood quite backward?, and his Face 

J)ointe4 oyer his right Shoulder. The upper and neither 
r'arts of it were fo bow'd together, that they feem'd one 
JLump, and you could hardly lee his Ej^es. His Forehead 
and Temples, which had been branded, wer^ full of Wrim 
iles and Scars. He was Hump'd both behind and before, 
and had fo little of a Hilman Figure, that he rather feem'd 
a huge Bottom of Yarn. His Legs and Feet were turnd 
upwards, and perch'd over his Shoulders, being both dif- 
jointed and "tvitlier'd. The only found Parts auout him 
;were his Arms a;)d Tongue, li'hich had been left unhurt bc- 
caufe he had moft Occafiori for tliem. He was ftiut up in a 
Cage like a Jackdaw,, and |3)ac'd on a little Afs,' whom he 
could guide through the Wires of his Prifon. He had, as I 
nave ajready told you, a great deal of Wit, and was excel- 
lent at Repartees; but he had this in common with other 
^^iig^J^^^'f^h^t^lili®' he could put good CloaAs^on his Bacfe, 

Book III. of Guzman d'AIfarache. 407 

he wore only Rags, the fpcedier to excite People's Cliarity.' 
He got a great deal of Money, but that as much by his 
witty Exprefljons, as the Compaffion he raised by his De- 
formity. He liv'd after this manner till he was 72 Years of 
Age and Ibme Months^ at the end of which, as miferable as 
he was, he had a great deal of difficulty to die. Finding, 
however, his Hour was come, and that he muft fubmit to 
it, and knowing that there was a God, who would punilh 
and reward eternally, he began to rcfleft on his paft Life, 
He faid, it was no longer time for Raillery and Jcftingj 
tlierefbre he immediately fent for a Confeflbr, whom nc 
knew to be a Perfbn of Piety and Learning. He difcours'd 
him about all his Affairs, as well Temporal as Spiritual; 
and was defirous to make nis Will, which he endited him- 
felf, in few Words, after the following manner. 

" Imprimis^ I recommend my Soul to God, who gave it, 
" and my Bwy to the Earth, to be decently interr*cf in my 
" own Parifti. 

htm^ My Will is, that my Afs be fold, and that the 
Money arifing from thence be employed on my Burial:, 
And^asformy Pack-Saddle, I bequeath it to the Great 
Duke, my Lord and Sovereign, to whom it of right be- 
longs,, and whom I hereby nominate and appoint my 
" Sole Executor, and Univerlal Heir. 

He died fome few Days after ; and as every Body knew 
hiiii to be a merry-conceited Fellow, and one that was ftill 
of his plealant Jefts and Fancies, they thought he would 
have died as he had liv'd, but they round their Miltake 
when they faw his Will, which now began to be made 

IDublick, The . Great Duke, who was one of the firft that 
lad been told the Story of this Beggar to divert him, had 
a difierent Sentiment concerning him ; and as he believ'd 
him to be not only a pleafant but difcreet Man, he fancied 
there muft be Ibmething more than ordinary in the Matter. 
He therefore commanded all the Telfators Goods and Chat- 
tels, and more efpecially the Pack-Saddle, to be brought to 
Court, that he might take cocnifdlce of them. Being 
brougnt accordingly, he caus'd the Pack-Saddle to be forth- 
with upripd from one^End to the'other^ and thereby. difco- 
vcr^leyeral Pieces of Gold of all kinds that were taken out, '• 

40 8 The Life and Anions Part L 

to the Value of ^600 Crowns. It came afterwards to be 
known, it was by the Advice of his Gonfeffer that he had 
fo difpos'd of his Eftate, for that Pcrfon gaye him to under- 
ftand what he had did not properly belong to him, and con- 
Jcqucntly he Ayould do well, for the Salvation of his Soul, 
to redore it to his natural Lord, the Great Duke, under 
tvhoff Prptcdionheai^ all his Brethren liv'd. The comply- 
ing with this Advice foon auieted his Conicieoce> and the 
Great Duke, like a good ana jpious Prince,, and an honeff 
and faithful Eacccutor, employ d all this Wtpney for a perpc-» 
tual Mafs. to be faid lb many tknes a/ Year for liis Teitator's 
Soul.' What do you fay now of the Pleafure this unhappy 
Wretch concciv'd in his Gold, tvhich to him was in lieu of 
every thing? I dare promife you have never had the like. 

Whenever I rcfje^i on the Pleafure and Tranquility of a 
Beggars Life, I cannot think the World can have any like it ; 
for, in Ihort, it is to have your Table ready fpread, your 
Bed ready made, ypur Chamber ready furniin'd, your Scrip 
and Gourd ready filfd, and, in a Word, all your Bufi- 
nel& ready prepared for you. You h?ive no Realbn to fbt 
any Thie ve& ; no ba4 Weather can hurt you ^ let it Rain 
or Shine, 'tis all one tp ypu. You are never coQcern'd a- 
^bout your Harveft or Seed-time, nor fear the Ravages of an 
Army. You neverarouble your Head with Modes, Fa- 
fliions, Cuftoms or Ceremonies. You have no occafion for 
Flattery or Lies to advance your felf ; are under no Care to 
find wherewithal to fuppprt your Equipage and Train, and 
maintain your Houfe and Family in its neceffiiry*Splenaouri 
You have no Obligation upon you to give Vifit% or receive 
any ; nor are ever perplex'd with thinking when ^tis proper 
to make Court to on^, and when to apother ; ; or how you 
Ihall approach fuch a Great Lord, or luch a Prime Minifier. 
You are never oblig'd tp be up betimes that-you may get early 
tp the Anti-Charnber, and where your Builnefs is only to 
(hew. that yoi| can wait and fawn like a Spaniel You are 
never jealous npr envious of anptlicr's Fortune, nor under- 
jriine any Body to get a Caufe or a Place fioni him. You 
never boa ft of your Birth, your Gxaiideur, your Drefs, 
your Equipage, your Houfe-keeping, your Wit, your great 
B^ploits, nor your Services. You never tell how well you 
have l^een receiv'd, how much you liave been admir d, noi! 
how diligeiuly you have been bcarken'd to. You never rail 

' at 

Book III. of Guzman d^Alfarache. 40^ 

at any Body, nor flandcr him that }}a8 juft beforfe fpoke' 
well of you. O! how many fine Thipgs could I lay far- 
ther on this Subject, if I were not afraid to difobligc and. 
tire the Reader, whole Pifture I very often draw, while X 
Icem to paint thbfe of other People ! The Qyality efpecial- 
ly excel! in Slander and Calumny, tho- Vices lo very un- 
worthy of them ; infomuch, that to mention a Man of 
Quality, is as much as to lay, he is a Perlon that does no- 
thing but (lander and backbite from Morning till Night, 
tliat has always fome Story or other to tell you" to anotfief s 
Prejudice, and oftentimes of his beft Friends or neareft Re- 
lations ; but this only to divert himlelf or his Company, 
at the Expcnce of his Neighbours or Kindred. But we muft 
flop here, and proceed no further, for this is a Road will 
lead us to the WorldVEnd. None of tbcfe Vices, never- 
thelefe, areto^be found among us Beggars, who are na- 
tumlly exempt from them and their ill Confequences, which 
mttft not be reckon d the leaft Part of our fiappinefs. 

/By what Rule or Compafe muft a Man fteer, whole For- 
tjane depends upon another's Pleafure? If it be Good, he 
lauft be contented to wait a long time for it ; and if Bad, 
'twill come but too foon. Whatever Care he takes of his 
Conduct to avoid Reproach, he fliall always have fome- 
thing faid againft him, either becaufe he ms or. has not; 
done Ibmewhat. Tho* what he has done be allowed by 
moft to be perfectly well performed, yet will there not 
want thofe that will give an ill Turn to, or falle Interpre- 
tation of it, according as they are enclin'd. If he talks, 
tho' never fo much to me purpofe, he fhall be reckon da 
Babbler 5 if he feys nothing, a Sot or a Fool. If he diC- 
courfes of high and delicate Matters, he fliall be astd what 
he lias to do with tliem ; and if of low and mean, every 
Body will defpife him. If he humbles himfelf, he is Mean- 
Ipirited ; if he ftands upon his Merit, he is Proud and Self- 
conceited. If he's prudent and moderate, he's thought a 
Coward ; and if too jplous of his Honour, a Royfter. If 
he has a bad Look^ ne's counted Impudent ; if a modeft 
one, a. Hypocrite 2 if he laughs, he s accused of Levity ,• and 
if he frowns, ot Arrogance. If lie's grave, he's reckon'd 
Saturnine* and if aftaole, too MercnrUL If he's cour- 
tepu?, he's flightly regarded ; if auftere, exceedingly ab- 
horr'd : if juft, he'& efteem'd cruel : and if merciful, a 


4 1 o The Life and ASlions Part I. 

fjlly Oaf. In a Word, t6 how many odicr falfe Conftni- 
Clions arc People's Characters fubjeft, according as they arc 
well or ill in the Opinions of certain Gentlemen who ict 
lip for Lords Paramount, and decide every Thing as they 
think fit, right or wrong. I was, at tliis time, in liich a 
Condition, as I thought, that no Accident could difturb my 
Tranquility, but Tune and Fortune, that fuffer nothing to 
be permanent in this World, at lengtli entrenchU upon my 
Repofe. This happened at Gaeta, whither I went, to fte if 
tlieu: Charity exceeded that of ^ow^, imagining tliat, skiUlbl 
as I was in my Trade, Doles and Benedictions would fliowcr 
down upon me like Hail. As foon as I were got to this 
Place, I planted my felf at a Church-Door with a Ibrt of 
icab]?y Head, which I knew very well how to counterfeit. 
The Governor of the Town happened to come by, who 
cafting his Eyes upon me, pitied me, and gave me Alms. 
This good Luck lalled for lome few Days, but as Covetout- 
ncfe at laft burfts the Bag, I on the next Fettival refolv^d to 
change my Trick, as what had been too much us*d. I there- 
fore determined to make my felf an Ulcer in my Legj, which 
was one of the Secrets I had learned of the famoys CordoiMn. 
I prcpar'd all was neccfl'ary for that purpofe, and tliinking 
my Leg would bring me in a goal Harveft, I went to 
Church, where I was no foon^er arrived, but placing my 
icif fo as I might be fcen, I began to howl in lucha Tone 
as if I had been exceedingly afflicted with my Ulcer, but 
with that ruddy and healthy Countenance, as fufficientiy 
tely'd my Complaints. Good People, however, took no 
notice of that, and I had almofl the whole Alms to my ielt^ 
For my Sins, I believe the Governor came likewife to tlut 
Church to hear Mafs^ who feeing me, knew me by my 
Voice in fpite of my Difguife, for 1 liad then an old 
Clout on, wliich reach'd even to my Eyes, but did not 
cover iny Head, fo that it plainly appeared my Scabs were 
gone. This Governor was one who liad feen a great deal, 
a«d confequently knew not a little. He could not imagine 
hpw, in lo (hort a time as fince he faw me laft, I could 
naturally have fo large an Ulcer a^ I complained of, or how 
it was poflible I could be fo loon cur'd of the fcabby Head 
r pretended to have. He doubted there was lome Roguery 
in the Cafe, and as it was his Duty to enquire into fuca 
Enormities, and punilh fuch Rogues as I fccin d to be, he 


Book III. of Guzman d* Alfarachc. 4 1 1 

was rcfolv^d to kn6w the Truth. He therefore feeing mc 
altnoft naked, took the Pretence of proflfering me a Shirt 
if I would go home with him. I went accordingly, not 
diftrufting any Thing, for if I could have guefs'd the leaft 
at his Defign, not even his two lubberly lackies that fol- 
low-d him fliould have been able to force me along ; •but it 
w^ my Fate to be fo us'd, becaufe I had deferv'd it. Be- 
ing come to his Houfe, he look'd more carneftly at me than 
before, which I thought foretold no Good, and then deman- 
ded of me, if I were hot the Perfon he had feen the other 
Day at fuclj a Church-Door with a fcalded Head. I 
changed Countenance, and had not Impudence enough io 
tell mm I was not. He then order'd my Clout to be taken 
oflfj^and found ttiy Head was as whole as his own j upon 
which, he proceeded to ask me hj what extraordinary Means 
I had Dcen cut'd io fpeedilyl I could not tell what to fiy, 
fo abaihi'd I was, and he minding little what I did fay, 
went on, and cry*d. Is it credible that fuch a young, lulty^ 
>velHook'd Lad as you are fhould have an Ulcer in Iiis Leg? 
I can by no means believe it. I know notj, my Lord, an-' 
fwer'd 1 with a very m9urnfu^ Air, how it comes to pafj^ 
unlefe it be tliat God is pleased it Ihould be fo. Having 
Ipofee thi^, I no longer doubted what Reception was pre- 
paring for me,' and tpcrefore caft my Eyes towards the Door ' 
to lee if I cbuld make my Efcape, but tourid it locked. Tho 
Governor then call'd for'a Surgeon to examine my Leg, and 
one' was immediately brought. He was, it feems, a very 
skillful Perfon, yet at firft doubted whether my Sore was 
not as bad as I pretended : but after die Gqyetnor had talsen 
llim afide a little, and wnifper'd him, hedete^ftcd the whole 
Cheat, and thereupon told his Excellency, I hkd no mord 
Ailment in my Leg than he had in his Eye j to which he 
added, if he would be plea^'d to order fome hot Water to ba^ 
]5rougnt, he fhould immediately fee tlie Fallacy. Hereupon 
Water was brought, whcnfettinff himfclf about unrolling 
and unbinding my Le^, an4 ridding it of all its Linen 
and Plaitters, lie made it plainly appear, by well rubbing 
and wafliing, that it had no other Ulcer than what I 
brought into the World with me. The Governor feeing 
this, was greatly aftonifli'd, and immediately ordered I 
fhould be paid the Cliarge of the Cure. I remained as it 
YfClQ in a Trance, and was ready to fwoon, not foipwing 

* ' ' \ what 

412 The Life and Anions Part L 

what cither to (ay or do ; but had it not been for my Youtb 
which always ftood me in good ftead, I bad been much 
better paid than I was, yet I had thirty good Lafties 
given me, which were more th^n fuHicient to fatifi- 

gfor my Journey, and had a Promiie of double the 
umber m cafe I ever returned to that Town any mor^ 
out of v^hich I was immediately thruii I obey'd this lait 
Order with great Exadbiefs and Diligence, making what 
haft I could away, and ever now and then fhruggme up 
my Shoulders, but never fo much as loc^ng once behind 
me, not caring to remember even the Road i went, unleis 
the Wounds t had, put me in mind of it, which they fre- 
quently did. I never ftop'd till I came into the Pope's Ter- 
ntorie^ which I loclk'd upon as an ^ylfm, and no fbonct 
£iw my dear Rome but the Tears came into my Eyes, re* 
fle6ling feverely upon my paft Folly of having left a plenti- 
ful Country, and the Delight of Beggarsi to go Sid havQ 
my Back flaw'd fc» notjiing at Gacu. 


Guzman difcourfes of Alms-givlngy and the many Ad- 
. 'uaantages of it : And then teUs you how, upon his rettim 
. t0 Rome and falling to his old Trado of Beggings he 
was taken in by a Cardinal^ pretending to have a, fort 
*' LfCgf who order d him to. be curd by two Surgeons, wha 
'Agreeing with him^ imposed on bis Eminence^ and got a 
'':^eat deal of Money. He lafily acquaints you how, be- 
"ing cureJy the Cardinal took a fancy to bin$^ and made 

»TI S a common thing for young Fellows to fee no far- 

^ thcr tlian their Nofcs/ efpecially in Cafes that are nice, 
and i;equire a ferious Refle6hon. It is not Undocftanding 
they wai)|:, but Prudcnc^ which is the Produft of Expe- 
jyence^ and Experience of Time. Unripe Fruit has not that 
gratctpl Taft it afterwards comes to have, but is fliarp and 
l^npleajfatit 5 fo a young Man,who is not yet arriv datYears of 
Maturuy,wants.his true Tafte to make Reflections onThings, 
and fails ih the fciowledge of what they are. It is no won- 
ftcy then he flaould err'^in this Particular, but would be 
" ' - : ' Pthcr 

3oofeIIL «/ Guzman d^Alfardche. 415 

father if he did not. A Youth, however, of good Parts, 
is more capable 6( thcfe Confidcrations, and readier to re- 
ceive the Impreflion of them. For my own 'part, I can 
truly fey, 1 ricvtt had any unlucky Tninfif happen to me, 
but it was immediately accompanied witn a Moral Re-- 
fteftion, which exceeded a Perfon of my Years ; and tho' 
the im^tuofity of my 'Humour, as well as the unfteddi- 
nefs of my Youth, foon made me to forget both this Re- 
flexion, and the Occafionof it, yet Aerc i-cmain'd enougli 
vridi me to preferve me from feveral future Diforders, into 
/whidh Iftiould othejrwife have feilcn. Iwasfenfible, for 
Ejeample, that all my Rogueries and Ways of cheating o- 
thersL were in the End but cheating my felf, and tlat I 
robbd fuch as were pobrcr than I of thofc Alms that of 
right bielong'd to them. The poor Man, however, cartjrK)t 
deceive, tho* it wis his Intention to do fo, becaiile he that 
givesj-jafegards not to whom he gives, but for whofe fekc. 
But, faid I to my felf, if I have Reafon to rejoice, in that 
Alms h^e been fo plcntifolly beftow'd on me, 1 have no 
Icfe to quake and trtmble; tor over and above tbit the - 
Medns I have made ufc of for this Erid have been unlawful^ 
\ have oftentimes had no occafion for thefc Aims, and being 
othcrwife able to get my Livelihood, I fliould one time or 
other be obligd to the like Rcftitution that the F/dr«»fi;if 
thought himfelf Ncverthclefs, when I confider'd certain 
rich old Fellows, who would be an Hour a fumbling for a 
poor Smfe or a Tingle Blanco to give you, and when they 
were without luch, you were fure to go without Charity j 
thcfe Wretches, I lay, would juftly raife my Indignation, 
and I could not forbear crying, Oyemiferablc Creatures, 
if I deceive you, 'tis what you richly deftrve. WePo^r 
are like Cyphers in Arithmetick, which go for nothing of 
themfclves, but being added to Pictures, make great Sums. 
Do not you examine, whctj&er the t^erfon dcfcrves Aims or 
not ; whether others have given him any thing, or nothing ;' 
if he^s able to Work or not 5 if he's old oryoung 5 well or 
ill cloathcl ; fick or in health : All thefe Things relate no- 
thing to you, and ferve only to excufe your Avarice, as 
you tliink 5 but your Bufinefs is to do Aos of Charity for 
God s fake, in whofe ' Name it is demanded of you. But 
that you may better know what Charity is, Iwilladd^ 
ihort Sifory ftom one Siphronm^ whom Gi/w/fiw, a veiy 


414 The Life and Anions Parti 

leatntd and pious Man, quotes. He (ays, a Widow Wo* 
man having one only Daughter, who was very , fair and 
beautiful, the Emperor Zcno became fo enamour'd of jher, 
that he could not fatisfy his Paflion, unlefs he enjoy'd her ; 
and not being able to do it by fair Means, he us a Force, 
and d^owred her. The afBidkd Mother, tiaving a more 
than ordinaryVeneration for the BlefTed Virgin, went often 
to pay her Devotion at her Shrine, begging both Ju(Hce 
and Revenge. The Author fays, one Day as this poor Wo- 
man was thus praying, fhe heard a Voice from Heaven fay 
to her. Ton vmi have been revengd, and had Jtifiice done jom 
ter m»^ hdd not the Emperors parity bound up the Hands tf 
Cod. Now what do you do with all your Wealthy you 
that have far more tlian you Iiave occafjon for ? Wny do 
you not employ it in afljfling the Poor ? You may well cx- 
pe6l God fnould take it from you to give it than, which 
you know he may eafily do. He that gave it, can require it 
^in whed he pleaib. You are n9t made of better Clay 
than I ; if you think ib, you are miihken. we are both of 
the £tme. You have been a little more taken care of in- 
deed by Heaven, and tliat*s wliat you ought to pay your 
Acknowledgments for, by relieving the Poor who are re- 
commended to you, and tor whofe Uie alone you have io 
great Riches given you. Tis more your Advantage to give, 
than theirs to receive. God has not fo much made the Rich 
for the Poor, as the Poor for the Rich. 

But I perceive you begin to think to turn me into Ridi- 
cule, and vainly to make my Procels upon what Fve al- 
ready . faid, that Alms are to be given without Choice ot 
Di(hn6tion to all fuch as ask tl>em of us. I agree with 
you, that Order ought to be obierv'd as well in Charity as 
other Matters, and I fay nothing to hinder it, I wifh only 
you would always obfcrve it j all I pretend to tell you once 
.more, is. That you ought to give Alms for God*s lake, and 
not. trouble your Head whether the Perfons deferve them or 
not, for tliat would be doing Pleafurc to your lelf, and be- 
• . coinine Cliaritable for other Ends tlian what you fhouid. 
It is the Governors and Magiikates Bufmefs to enquire 
who arc poor, and vvho only pretend to be fo. Tbey are 
not placed in their Offices meerly to make good Clieer, di- 
vert themfclves, and take their Plcafure, but to watch over 
tfao NeceOities of the Publick, to lament the Miferies of the 

Book III. of Guzman d^Alfarache. 41 5 

People, and to reward, affift and punifli, as every one {hall 

I was now come once more to Rtrnty which I law before 
mcj but durft not enter in Triumph, after fo fine an Expe^ 
dition as I had made. I entered then with Loul-Ears, and 
Tears in mv Eyes, but that ratlier for Joy than Grief, look- 
ing upon that dear City as my 'Nurung-Mother, whom I 
would willingly have embrac d upon my fo happy Return^ 
had I but had Arms long enough. I foon fell to my oldcourfe 
of Life, which I had 16 great Benefit from, that I quickly 
forgot my Difgrace at Gaeta. 

When once we have efpoufed any fort of Life," we have 
no relliftifor any other, tho' never Xo ;uft and reafonablc. 
This of mine, which I Jed with the Beggars^ feem'd the 
moft charming and delightful that could be^ and I look'd 
upon all others as mifctable and contemptible. 1 was not, 
neverthdefs, altogether Blind, I had a Notion of Good 
arid Evil, but Aill my Inclination prevailed upon me, in 
prejudice of all tliat was Good. I got me up one Morning 
betimes, and went to wait at the Gate of a Cardinal, whom 
1 knew to be in Reputation for his Charity. I had prepared 
one of my Legs after that manner, tliat 1 thought it would 
be Proof againft the Skill of the beft Surgeon in Romey and 
fo compofing jny Voice and Mien to a mournful Air, I b^ 
gan to beg in a very languilhing Tone. People went in 
and out continually, and fcarce any pafs*d by but gave 
me fomething. At length came the Cardinalhimfelf, who 
coming to go out,. and for whom I had all along waited, 
I began to let up my Pipes in'a more hideous manner than 
before, wreathing my Body into a thoufand Poftures, and 
crying, My Nobl# Lord, for Chrift's fake have pity upon a 
poor fick and crippled Sinner, who is not able to get his 
Bread, nor knows not which way to turn him. This illuftri- 
CUE Prelate feeing me in that feemiug bad Condition, ftop'd 
to liear me, and looked earnellly at me for lome time, as if 
' he had been thoroughly prcpoflcls'd of my Mifery. He did 
not feem to confider me as a common Kafcally Beggar, as 
indeed I was, but as one that was really what I pretended 
to be, and therefore immediately ordered his Servants to 
take me up in their Anns, carry me into his own Bed- 
chamber, where he made them take off my Rags, and put 
on me one of his own Shi^u, and lay me m liis own Bed, 
, , • whilil 

4?^ ' The IJff and A^om Bac^ 

• 41 

Mrhilft be had another prep^r'd for himfelf 
Room. OGoodncfs, whiclimuftof ncceffityproceai 
% Heart fin'd with the Love of God ! O Charityv i 
may ferve for an Example to all fudhi Chnftians'as 
love jour Saviour Cfarift, in the Pei<fons of the Poori ' 
ihripd naked^ to cloatli me better. IhadallOccafi* 
Be^nc^ .taken from me, bv having more givenmel 
could Kquire^ or, indeed^ tnan Ti'as necefl'ary. I was 
ivhelm'dwith Courtefies and Favours, tlio' I did notd 
rvtn the leaft of them. Gqd is fometimes pldts*d fo tcybh ^ 
die mott wick^ Sinners. This good and hdv Canli 
9iot ftop here, he loaded me with &rt)ier Kindndl 
lending for two of the moft fiimous Surgeons in 
City; he order'd them to take care of my Lcg^ 
iwould £itisfy them for it ; fo leaving me m thSijt 
Jic blefs'd me, and went to the Confiftcnj, whithi» 
jbefeife goinjg. Thefe two Artifts, as wife as they \ 
tiot at firft underftand <ny Cale, but judg'd it i 
rrying, my leg muft be cut off to flop the Gutm^O^t 
how deceiv'd tney were, for all that Ulcer had^ be^'" 
fion'd only by a tew Herbs, of which, if 1 omitted 
|)Iication out three Days, both the FleOi atid ^dA 
return as fair and found as ever. My phimp aiiii 
•Countenance, howevcn always betray 'd die, as y 

it did now ; for one ot the Surgeons, nftMfc iiibtle , 

•other, obferving how well I lookd, began to fiilpe^ 
withftanding my piteous Grimaces, that there wan 
Roguery in the Matter, as it feems he hadExperi^ ' 
like Gafes. He therefore proceeded to examine i 
more narrowly, and tried all Ways to deteft my 1 
They had both thrown oflf their clloaks, and call' 
Things neceflary for a great Cure After feeling fl 
they began to demand of me how long I had Iiad 
cer ? If I did not know how I firft came by it ? If 
any Wine ? What I cat commonly ; and the like. ] 
all went well, for I gave them the moft pertinent AisArcfS 
that could be defir'(ij but I was ffill in Pain for i#fert 
would follow, for I heard one of them anfwer the otlier, 
who would have a Cauftkh apply'd, and fome proud Flelh 
taken away, That, in his Opinion^ the only Remedy would 
be to take off my Leg. But this he fpoke out of pure Cun- 
toing, for he knew my Malady as wdl as my felr, Ffc had 



*• • 

. V 

♦ A 


P . 

- ■*» 

4 .^ 








Book III. of Cuzmzni^M^t^fhc- 41 f 

- -.. ^.__ , long 
tould, an4 if they ftiould come jb that EttfOBity they proi' 
posd, IthcU^ Jt would be time chough at laft to dif- 
cover the Mat^jr, rather thah cxjpofc hy felf to bp made 
nuferablc all jny Days, fojrldid pot dpubt btittheyd«f 
y?;« d jyhat^diey pretended. ^ Then I began td teftcft on my * 
llight Pjinifliment at Gaeta in V^lpe(Jl to this, for 1 could 
never propofe to get <^ at fo cheap a Rate as I did there, 
^at thcfe KcfleAions camp too late, as mine inde^ alwaj^ 
did. There wajs Jiardl^r a ^int in Ac Skies but I recom- 
Sf^pded my felf to his Ptotedion, cfpecjal^y to'thc G6c4 
in^ tho*;| coUid n6t cafily believe there Wa6 any Pattoiri 
there fot Rogues and Robbers. In a WbtcL whilft J Wis 
binder the greateft Perplexity to think ivfvA they woyld do 
With me, the Surgeons, aftet havihg pdT*i upori^ cbtj,* 
lideri turtfd and tols*d my Leg aboUt, retired ihtb anb- 
tlier Chamber to talk in private concerning mc. 1 thbueht 
It but my Duty to jtiear what they faid, and thrfpfi^ tp^y 
m- mt been gone fohg before | got u^, and^eht foftly 
?*t^ to hgatken. I heard ohfe % to the- othef, We njay 
™*?/ mi Cute of this, and make it laft a gpjq^^ while 
h^ ^{ ^c manage Matten h«t rightly, fot I d^n t dotibt 
D^t the Bone is touch'd. The iSone is i^ mbre ^uditl^ 'iiF 
iwer d the other, Aan mine is, for I would (engage to cUrc 
^^ y,% i/i |tot %S| How) repUed^^.^fit^feUc^ 

ir.^j wnat you ymU it is as l lay; ^ % aon t ttouiTt your 
**petieticc. repl|c^ the fccond, w|io, ncverthefefi, kncyr 

-*i"^ucncc. rep;|c?i tnc iccona, wjno, ncverineteis. Knew 
?|2^ .^f tibe Majter j but I wont lay this Wager with ybu^ 
Jl^yfe t^ori't win my Friend^$ Money. For look yc, jp^r- 
lUed hft, is it not fuf&ient if ive get a Sum tbgcthen jvith^ 
out troubling our H«ad5 ajiy fe/ther ? Butj between Ftterids^ 
l^, fecure ybu^ for I have knowp ihe like Cafe ftat 
m 1$ npjaiing but a Sham-Ulcct cailsU'by certi^n Pblfon^ 
^^^M«bs, Ind that our Patient isJbUt aC^jf-^tfl. ' f htf 
^W Surgeod n^iras Vmt iinwilUtig to tfefipve t^s^ ah* 
*^5ht Ti >bne^9i^d h^ Reti^tation .to tS^Mo Wtj^Qf 

41 8 The Life anJ ASlioni Fartl. 

Affcrdon, therefore nuintain'd it ftrenuoufly ; fo that the 
Difputc was like to have grown hot, had not dje fecond 
Surgeon^ more Politick and Ids Paflionate, work'd his Bro- 
ther down by meer Art, and brought him to hear Reafbn. 
He told hiiii, he would be convinced of the Truth of what 
he affirm'd, .if he would but infpeft the Pan as narrowly 
as he had done ; but he faid, that was not the Bufinefs, the 
Matter was to make a Purfe of Moncyj and befides^ why 
ihould they go about to ruin a poor Devil, who had done 
this only for Suftenance. lie urg'd moreover, bot^ God 
and Nature requir'd they fhould conceal the I^ailings of 
their Fellow-Creatures, and, that (cein^ thfey could get 
bodi Reputation and Money by this Cure, and run no 
Riiquc. It not being likely the Patient would difcover it, 
why mould they not do it ? The firft Surgeon (bund his 
Brother's Arguments fo good, that he confeqted to be rul'd 
. by him, provided the Ulcer was fiich as. he maintained it to 
be ; .but (aid, he would not yield till he was fully iatisfied 
in that Particular. However, before they^ proceed any 
farther, they enter'dinto a Detiate about dividing the Money. 
The fecond Surgeon, who had deteftcd the Roguery, pre- 
^ tend^, if the Matter was as he faid, he would have more 
than a Half-Share, which the otlier would by no means 
grant ; fo that falling out about it, and both being in a 
inanner mon the Point of refolving to acquaint the Car- 
dinal witn tlie whole Truth;, Iflepd in, for I thought it 
proper t9 lojfe no more tinie, ' and falling on my Knees, be- 
\ gan with Tears in myEycs (for I could cry wnen I would) 
to utter fiiibh moving Things, as well relating to their Good as 
mine, that at length I prevailed on them to join with me in the 
Cheat, and unite for our commonTnt^eR. Being thus a- 
greed, wereturn'd into his .Ewi»ifw*/s Clumber, where they 
proceeded to infpedt my Leg anew, not to conuder how to 
cure it, for that was not neceilary, but to make it a lafting 
Sore, that they might have tinie to get Money by it j lo 
that chafing me with Peftilential Oils, and plaiftering mc 
with poifonous Plaifters, they r9urd up my pretended Ul- 
cer, and each taking me in his Arms, as if I had been 
the moft indifpos'd rerfon imaginable, they were juftcarry- 
ing me towards the Bed when his Eminence came into me 
Chamber. He had been ameify all the while he was in the 
OnJ!/{9ry on account of my lllhels, fo excellently good he 

Book III. of Guzman d'Alfarache. 41^ 

was, and that made bim make all the hafte he could back 
to hear News of me. The Surgeons told his Eminence^ it 
was a grievous Ulcer I had, which bean to mortify, out 
that Heaven having, as it were, direfted mc to his End- 
nence\ Door to favc my Life, they would engage, with 
God's Afliftancf, to ftop the Gangrene and efteO: a Cur^ 
the* they had not a Moment to lole. They laid moreover, 
there muft be great Gare taken of mc, and they would 
come twice a Day till fuch time as the Mortification began 
to abate, after which^ coming feldomer would do. His 
Eminence was very well pleas a with what they tqld him, . 
and bid them be fure to co^le regularly, according as oc« 
cafion required/ till fuch time as I were out of danger} 
and as for his Part, he faid he would §ive order that no- 
thing fliould be wanting that was convenient for me. Upon 
hearing this hft Dialogue between his Eminence and the 
Surgeons, I was exceedingly reviv'd, for hitherto I had been 
under no fmall Concern for fear thofe treacherous Ras- 
cals fhould betray me, as they had done the Cardinal; 
but now feeing, tliem embark d in the fame Danger \fnih 
any felf, I bcg^n to take Heart a little. You fhould have 
feen me in this magnificent Bed. where I was ferv*d like ai' 
Prince for three Months together,, during all which time 
thefc Rogues of Surgeons kept me xmder their Hands. I 
was heartily tir*d Fll affure you, and, notwithffcinding all 
iny good Treatment, could not but refleft ypon the Onions 
ot Egypt, and the Plcafures of my Life mft j fo that being 
impatient of undergoing any ferthet Penance, and not 
caring to be locked up any longer on this Hypocritical Ac** 
count, I made application to thefe Fellow-Rogues of mine 
1 to difmifs me, which they at length did at the end of 
1 three Months, tho* their Defign was to have confin'd me 
L much longer. Havitig, asIVc feid, thus made niy Appli- 
l cation, they began by degrees to flacken their Unions 
and Plaiflers ; lo that in few Days my Leg became whole 
E as it had ever been. This done, they went to acquaint his 
Eminence with it, who having view'd it, looked upon iX as 
a Miracle of a Cure, and largely rewarded the Surgeons. He 
had been fo good, during my Indifpofition, a* not to fail 
one Dsiy to come and fee me , and at firft he fent almoft 
every Hour to know how I did. As hg found \u mc ^ 
greaj de^il pf ready Wit, he lov'd to talk with me^ and a^^lc 

420 The Life and ABions Part I, 

snc ieveral Queftions much above the teach df an ttdmrj 
Beggar, to which I would anfwer fo fmattly^ that he tobx 
a huge Fancy to me, and at laft would mcds have itie to 
be his Page, which was au Honour I could nt^tt (ute 
hop'd for, and by which I might have fii0identlv benefit- 
ted my leiF, if I had but known how. I was neseupon 
remov'd into another Appartment, and new cload^'d in 
order to wait upon his Eminence. 

CHAP- va 

Guzman ffeais ^f the many Changes in tbi Worli, 
and laments bis own tate Change of Life^ as not cm- 
far able to the Condition of a Beggar. He teBs yofi fevt- 
rai little Thefts of his ; and at laft accjuaints you 'Hfith 
one that he was founily laflyd for^ V^bichy howtver^ hi 
fufficientty revengd on the Executioner* 

TTHis was a great Cliangc indeed, from a poor Beggat at a 
, Cardinal's Gate, to become his Eminence*s Page. In 
like manner all Things change in tliis World, and wc 
change wdth them, not only our Conditions and our For- 
tunes, but likewife our Humours^ our Undcr^ndings j 
nay, let but one Day pafs, and we (hall not know cut 
fel\res. We no longer know thofe we have been formerly 
well acquainted with, or tliey no longer know us, accotd- 
inc to the different Situations that Fortune has plac'd us in. 
The World it felf leems to be upon the perpetual Change, 
infomuch that if a Man could be abfent firom it only Ten 
Years, and return again at the Expiration of that i imc, 
be would not be abJc to know where he was, but would 
think he had drop'd from the Skies. I would fiiin know 
!lvhat the Mode and Cuftom does npt occafion to change, 
and how great a Variety of Dependants wait upon theni. 
Tloe Mode not only affedts the Matter of HaUte and Orna- 
ments, but the Manner of Dreffing, which we fee change 
daily. We are no longer pleas'd with thoife Cloaths tbt 
chann d us but juft before, but rauft have thena of a ne^ 
Faihion, and vary the Method of putting thcmoninccl- 


Book III. of Guzman d'Alfarachc' 421 . 

lantly. We muft likcwifc have Variety and a Mode in Talk- 
ing, Walking, Bowing, Eating, and even in Arts and Sciences, 
nay in many otha Things, which to defcribe would require 
a Volume apart, and tnerefore I fhall omit them. All 
thefe mtift alter and vary continually, or they cannot pleafc 
us, the Mind of Man growing tir'd with what is old and 
c<Miimon, and defiring Novelties continually. For my own 
part, I muft needs lay, I' was not a little delighted when 
1 faw how I was bedaub d with Gold ana Silve-Lace. 
What fine Silk Stockings I had on, what neat Shoes, 
vrhat white and fine Linen, what glaring Ribbons, and 
the like^ all which I took a great deal of Care to (hew to 
evcjy (jlafe I came near, wreathing my Body into a thou- 
fandi Antick Pofhires, and making a thoufand Turns and 
Returns about the Room, but all in Sight of my dear Mir- 
ror. I was quickly qualified for this wanton Employment 
of a Page j I need only be lhew*d a thing once to learn it, 
and that as perfe&ly, as if I had pra<%s'd it all my Life long. 
Nay, I topp'd upon the reft of my Comrades, and invented 
new Ways of waiting and introducing People to my Lord, 
which pleased his Eminence exceedingly. I had the good 
Fortune to pleafe him in moft I did, and if it had not been 
the Fault rather of my Condud tlian my Fate, I might 
have made my felf by it; but how {hall a Man do well, 
when he is too much at Eife? This regular Life, which 
I was obliged to obferve, did not at length by any means 
plesifeme. To Pray, Eat^ Sleeo and Riicatfet Hours, in 
which I was never to fail^ did not at all agree with me. 
I had no Liberty which was not immediately found Fault 
with, I could commit no Roguery but which was look'd 
ppon as abominable. To take Care of my own Cloaths 
and thofe of other People, to behave my felf with thq 
greateft Nicety and Exadtnefs, to be modeft and prudent in 
all my Adions, andathouiand other Things of the like 
Nature, to which 1 had been neither Bred lior Educated, 
made me to figh after ^e Life of a Beggar fQ full of Eafe ' 
and Pleafure, which I had forfook for tHis fine Bmpioyment. 
What could I have defir d more, faid I to aiy iSf, thaa I 
formerly enjoy'd, and what vtras wai|)Qng th^n to make my 
Condition truly tiappy? I had eiioygb to cat and to fpare. X 
(lept from Morning till Nigti^t, I depended on no Bodyi 
I nether took Care for ipay mn Al^^l nor any Body's 

B c } clfc, 

41 a The Life and Anions Part I. 

elfe, 1 got more Money in a Week than I do now in a 
Year, I did only tvhat I pleas'd, and had no Reaibn tq 
apprehend being contradicted or reprimanded for any 
thing. All Rome was my Province, and all was even too 
little. What an Alteration do I find now ? With rfiy fine 
Pages Coat, I have neither liberty to cit, fleep, laugh or 
talK, without another's PermiflTion. This is not living, qr, 
at leaft, not living for ones felf, but rather for another Bo- 
dy, as Slaves do^ who have not the benefit of their Birth^ 
right, for Man fure was not born for this End. O charm- 
ing 6e^ry ! What have I loft in lofmg Thee, who art 
made up of endle& Joy and Fleafure ! I am here in conti- 
nual Hurry and Contufion, either running up Stairs or 
down,' trotting about my Lord's Bufmcls, waiting on him 
in his Chamber, Coach or elftwhcre, lighting him a- 
bout from one Place to another, and the like Utiidgery 
which never hardly ceafcs. I muft fometimes get bdtorc 
the Coach; at others, keep ftanding for Hours togdther; and 
for what end, I pray ? Why, only to fte my Loiii play or 
cat^ when, perhaps, I have a mind to do both my felf 
This is a hard Cafe you'l fay, but I muft bear it. But then, 
Vrhat does this fine Page get at tlic Years end ? Why no^ 
thing. He has fine Cloatns indeed given him, but that 
not 1q much for his own Ule, as his lord's Honour. Even 
at laft^ We Pages get nothing but the Poil^ the Itch, or 
fome luch Scurvy Difeafe, unlefs it be a few Ends rf Fbm- 
beaux, which we make fome fmall Profit bf, by felling 
them to the Cobler^. This is the mott we muft cxpeit, 
dio' fometimes we may lay out Hands upon a wnolc 
Flambeau, but then wc run a Rifque of being ftrap'cL foif 
we are watdf d continually. For my part, who coula not 
be contented with fuch fmall Fronts, and who had been 
us'd to greater Advantages, I fell flatKlalli upon my Fellow- 
Pages, and robb*d them as they robVd their Matter. They 
were but filly Fellows, and I could deal well enough witn 
them. AU their little Tricks amounted only to robbing th^ 
Plates, and getting now and then a Tit-bit One ajiiong 
the reft had a pretty Accident befell him.' As fac was 
waitingone Da£ at Table, he charic d to thruft his Hand 
into a I>ifll of Fritters^ whence taking out half a dozen^ 
he wrapUthcm up in his Handkerchief and cramn^'d thent 
into his Fockd. The Fritters being v^ Bot> aiidpoit up 

■ ■ ■ ■ • w 

Book III. of Guzman d^AIfarachcJ 423 

in a clofe Place^ foon began xm difcharge their Honey 
wherewith they were made, vVhich melting, ran down a- 
pace along the Page's Stockings without nis perceiving. 
His Eminence happening to turn his Head that way to 
ask for fomething, ' prefently iaw the Honey, and gucfling 
at firft Sight wmt it was, began to laugh heartily, askitig 
t\it Page what Wound he had got that the Blood ran down 
his Legs. All the Company, and even the Servants, began 
to laugh too, which lo confounded the poor young Pel- 
Jow, uiat he knew not which way to turn him; however 
he dcferv'd it, for being fuch a Blockhead to expofe him- 
felf in that manner forlb fmall a Matter. He moreover 
paid dear enough for his Fritters, having due Chaftifement 

given him for nis Theft the fame Day. I dare jpromifc you 
lould never find my Father's Son guilty of iuch a Folly. 
To keep my Ffcind in ure, I robb'd my Comrades of what- 
ever they nad that was good for any thing, and they 
never were able to find it out, fo desctrous l was. At 
length finding they could fcero nothing for me, they be- 
came more vigilant and watchful, which neverdielefe Gg- 
jiifiol little againft my Dexterity. 1 however look'd upon 
all this as Childs-Play, yet, ratiier than ftand out, would 
venture upon any Thing, even Edibles that I did not much 
mind, being naturally no Glutton, I know not whether 
I had contrafted an ill Habit by converfing with thefe 
Pages, but fure I am my Nature was at length quite changed, 
as thef fay it will do in time. I was now as much for 
jnean rilferijig as the word of them, and Tit-bits and Dain- 
ties running m my Head, I gave into them Uke an Epicure. 
Wherever I faw any Tmng of that kind, 1 was fure to 
leave the Marks of my Tallons lipon it, and hardly any 
thing efcap'd me. Now it happened that nis Eminence hacL 
in an adjoining Room to his Bed-Chamber, a great Cheft 
of Sweetmeats, made up of the choiceft candied and dried 
Fruits that Italy afforded. As often as he had a mind to 
tafte of thofe Fruits and I was by lum, which I was oftener 
than any Body elfe. he would give me the Key to take fome 
cut, but he would always be prefent himfelf, diftrufting, 
as 1 fuppos'd, my thieving Temper, wloich I was hearti- 
ly vex'd at. This rais'd my Inclination fo much, that at 
length I could not refift the Temptation j therefore refol- 
fipg to have a Lick at them, come what would of it, I ber 

^ah to think o^ the moft ptoper Means (o ScSt it ttii 

Chcft was about two YardU and a half long, and welt 

Mrtought, dccording to the manner o( Shdn and It fly ^ but 

it had only oiie I^k in the middle. I feeing this, got a 

Wooden Wedge, wbidi 1 drove in at one of the Corners, 

and by degrees rais d die lid fo high, that t had room to 

t^ut in my naked AnUf t liad then the Pleafure to pick 

and chule where I pieas'd^ dfpedall]^ when I made ule of a 

pointed Sti^k) which reacn'd me iip what I wanted, tho 

never fo d^cp, or at never fo great a diftance* This fuc- 

c^eded twice or thrice ; bat as I was too lickerilh, and came 

too often, dicrc were at length fo great Hol^s made, that 

his Emirunce came to find out the Cheat, efpeciajly Wnen lie 

favir a £iir Citron gone, of which he had a mipd to talk. 

He was greatly furpris'd, and the mprc vex'd, m that any 

Body fhould prefume to meddie \Vitb wliat he had wholly 

referv'd to himfelf. He made great Enquiries about it, and 

cmj)lpy'4 the Sixiretary. who was an ili-natur'd and four 

Vx\sAy to fee if he could find out the Thief. Bqt to little 

putpofe was his Searching, his Threatning, his Fromifing, 

for all Was fully digeftSi, apd nothing'could have dlfc^ 

vcr*d m^ but my Shirt, and if tjiat could have told Talcs, 

I Would nevef ^ve trufted it. I was fulpefted no more 

thaii another, tho' in Truth \ had a Roguc*s Look. At 

laft all the Bufinefs blew over, and when it had been ulkd 

of two br three Days,' no more was faid of it. His £wi- 

p^nce^ howeycr, the' he feeirfd to take no farther notice, 

kept it ftijl in his Mind* and was ttill defirqUs to fii^d out 

the Ko^u^. He was afraid fometliing wqrfe migjit mp- 

peh to him, and conieqpeptly was oftet^times awajce when 

cve^y Body thought he (lept. For my part, fuppofing lb 

g;rcat a Man as he coulil riot trouble lus Hea4 long about 

liich Trifles as tliis, 1 y^ rily thought h« bad for^o^ it ; there- 

to Lid of tbe Chcft as before. 1 thruft in iny Arm a good 
Way, it feemihg to mc they had temov'd thi? Sweetmeats as 
fair as they cj>^ld put of my reacl^ ; but as 1 was gropbg a- 
bouty \m Eminence diro* a ftrarigc Fatality happening to. 
cOrti^ into his Chamber, arid not Sndin^ me thert as \ us'd 
\p bei cilltl tot me/ I m a great Frlg^ going t^ Withdraw 


fiookW. cf duzman d'Alfatdchc. 42$ 

iny Arm fomcwhat ta(}ily, dunc'd to ftrike out the Wedge 
witli my Elbow, whereby I was caught by the fpring of 
the Lid. and could nOt calily recotct my felt I might, *tis 
trobable, have eot tny Arm Itdk^ ir I had made a good 
Effort, but I had nftft tim? tg do it, for his Bminertce won- 
dering I did not come nor arilwer after he had call*d once, 
and Ixfides, being mov'd to Icalquly by th^ tJolfe he heard 
the Lid make, began to fulped): fomcthing, and therefore 
immediately coming towards the Place, found me as I have 
told you. Ah ! Is it then you, (aid M, not being able to 
forbear laughing at the Comical Figure I madc^ Is it you, 
my feithful Ouz^an^ that have thus robb*d mo of my Sweet- 
meats ! Which Saying, he gave a ftamp withv his Foot, and 
iimnediately the reft of the Company came in, lirho ail be- 
held me in that deplorable Condition, nay even the Fntr 
ter-Page made a Jeft of me, as I had betore done of hinu 
But this was another-guefs Cafe to his, and 1 had a great 
deal worfe Raillery to deal with, but I durft not (peak a 
Word. I bore all patiently, and held down my Head. At 
length the Fox is caught^ guoth his jBmmenccy and we mufk 
fee next what we have to do with him. All the Company 
interceded for my Relcafc, and I was delivered, but not 
from jPijnilhmcnt, for all they could fay could not free me 
from the Lalh which I was dcftin'd to. All they could ob- 
tain wi^*that I fhould not have above half the Stripes ' 
were dengn\[ me, and that in truth was Favour enough, 
cohfidering toe bad picample I had given, and the heinous 
Crime I bad ctomitted. The Punifhing of me was com-, 
mitted to Sigmpr Nicola his Eminences Secretary, who 
being my mortaPEnemy, gave me indeed b^t twelve Lalhet 
as he had been orw'd, but thofe with fo good a Will, that 
I was hardly ablc\o ftir for above a Fortnight after. 1 
was niad at Heart \t this Ufagc, and would have done 
any thing to have rwchg*4 njy lelf, but I diffembled my 
Refi^ntwent accofdin^o the Cuftom of this Country, yet 
it was not long befbte^ had ap Opportunity^ whichi tiras 
tefolv'd not to let flip. \You muft Knpw this was the Sea- 
fon for Afefftiito's^ wherewit}i Signior Niada was fo plaeu'd 
he could not fleep Ni6(hV nor Day. This oblig'd nim 
tQ gp a)a4 lodge in another Chambet^ but all to little pur- 
fdi&y for {hey followed him and tormented him continually. 
He was a ?^rf^|^ ;hat }9v'4 W ^^t ^n^ conf^iiexitly they 


The Life and ASlions PartL 

pnnr'd more than ordinarily vtsations to bim. He had had 
lereral Secrets given him to drive them away, but none 
fiicceeded. At knph I oflFer'd one, which I told him was 
infidlible. and which we commonly made ufe of in Spam 
in like Gifes. This was, to take a good Bunch of Parlley, 
dip it in Vpegar, and lav it at his Beds-head, which I ac- 
quainted hun would uiiooubtedly kill tliofe Vermin. He 
oeliev'd me, and did as I had diredted, but this Method 
.utras fo far n:om fuflfocating or driving away thefe Infedis, 
that it did but invite them the more, fo that be was more 
plagu'd than fonnerly, and confequently when I came 
fliiext Morning to fee how he did, he could hardly look 
out of hb Eye^ which were extreamly fwelfd and bloated, 
nay he was like a Leper all over bis Body. As fbon as 
be iaw me, he calfd out to tell me my Secret was not 
worth a Farthing, for he had been more uung that Njdit 
than any of the toregoing. I aflur d him, the Fault muftb^ 
wholly his own. and that either he had not let Uie Parfley 
fieep long enougn in the Vinegar, or that the Vinegar was 
Viot ftrong enough, for that in my Chamber I had totally 
driven ttoft Vermin away, infomuch tliat there was not 
one to be feen, whereas there were groit Numbers before 
I us'd this Remedy. He believ'd me again, and refblv'd to 
renew the Experiment To be more fure, he had fieep'd 
Paxfley not only put into his Bed, but fcatter'd all over his 
Chamber, whereby God knows what furious Attacks he 
was emos'd (o from thofe Animals. Legions of them came 
into the Chamber ; fo that keepi|ig him awake for feveral 
/ISights together, he at ^ leneth fell down-right Sick H? 
yras moreover fo disfigur'd^ that no Body could have know4 
i^un, and the left coming at laft to be known, he was fuffi- 
pently laugh'd at His Eminence coming to n^r the Story, 
jfaughd heartily ; and after having a little reprimanded me, 
made -me to beg the Seaetary's Pardon, which was a new oc- 
diflon of Mirth, for no Body could forbear being merry at diQ 
sight of him, a^d ^c I^emonbrance how I had f^ry'a \m, 


' ' < 

Sook IIL of Guzman' d*^Birachp. 427 



Guzman telU^ ba^v he rwengd the CardinaFs Gentleman^' 
Ujher upen his Secrttary : And aftfrwards acquaints jvm 
-'with a notable Theft fff hiSy "which had like to have 
cofi him his Place; hut his pminenfC retain d him out 
of meer Charity, in hopes he might have an Opportunity, 
to teach him better ^ and prevent^ if pojjible^ his utttr. 

^ erct fincc my unluciy Adventure of the 
_ Sweetmeats, I had been difcharc'd from attending as 
a Page. I now no longer waited on nis Eminence^ but was 
baniih'd to the Gcntleman-Uflicr's Appartment, and ftnr'd 
in Qpality of a Foot-Boy during my Difgracc This was 
a very good fort of Man, good humour'd, and down« 
right noneft, but a little fimcifiil. He had leveral young 
V^omen his Relations that were very Virtuous, but Pcion 
to whom he would often fend in a Joint of fomething and 
go and eat with them. He had many Enemies in our Houf^ 
efpccially our illuftrio^s MofquitoSecKtaLTyy who would be 
always playing ypon him ; lb. that .they often made Sport 
for his Eminence^ who ieem'd greatly diverted with it On^ 
Night, the Gentleman-Uftier having been at Sapper widi 
his Relations, came home a little flufter^d, and finding 
himfelf out of order, fneak'-d to Bed* His Eminence mi^ 
fmg him, ask'd for him, aiid was told he was no;t very 
iyell. He fent fome Body immediately to Ipnow how hcf 
did, and Word was brought he was a little indilpofcd (di 
the preient, but doubted not, by the Blefling of (Sod, to 
be able to wait on his Eminence next Morning. This pafi'cf 
yrell enough; but the Secretary, whowasalway? endea- 
vouring to pick a Hole in the Gent leman-Ufbers Coat, had 
found out th? Truth ; Wherefore refolving to play nim a 
Trick, lie had one of the Pages drcfs'd in a young Woman*j[ 
l^abit, and fept ^im into bs Chamber betimes in the Morn^ 
ing, ordering hiiii to get behind the Bed-Curtains whilfl he 
was MIccp^ He didas hip was ordered ; wkn the Secretary 


TV - X- 

42^ The Life and ASlions Vart I 

itntncdiately went to the Cardinal, and told his Emif^emty 
lit uildermod the U(her was much better, knowing he 
would be preiently for going to fee him. The CarciQnal, 
who was a true Father ot his Family, determined to go ac- 
cordingly ; and the Uiher, who haa Notice of it, prepared 
to receive the Hotiout was intended him. His Eminence 
came in juft as the Uiher was bolted up in his Bed, and after 
fee had a^'d him a few Q^eftions, the Page ajspear'd i who 
ieeniing in great Diforder and Surprife, naving his Coif 
4angting about his £ars, drop'd a Curly, and ran out in 
^rcat Confufion. The Cardinal, not knowing what all this 
meanti was fi;reatly furpris'd too ; and much mote io, when 
he law the tJlher under iiich Confternation, that he was a- 
bout to leap naked out of his Bed feveral times to fare 
kimfelf, btheving thi^ was a Spirit fent on purpoie to tempt 
fcim. This made all the Company laug^ who were privy to 
the Defign ^whereby the Cardinal coming alio to underiund 
this was a Trick upon his Ufher, and leeing him continue 
in the lame Agitations as before, he took pity of him, ani 
md die Goodnels to undeceive him himfelf. I came into 
the Room juft after his Eminence was gone cut, when the 
Ufher, hardly recovered from his Fri^t, told me the whole 
Story^ not doubting but he was obhg d to the Secretary for 
wlut had happened. I heard ail very patiently ; and when 
lie had done* told him, my Opinion was« he ought to re- 
turn Trick for Trick. He laid, that was bis Deugn, but 
he knew not how to do it without my Afliftance ; by 
which you may fee, I was not look'd upon as a Novice in 
this Family. The Ufher was a very honcft Man, as IVc 
already iniorm'd you, but he had no great Brains, and 
therefore could not depend upon his own Invention; how- 
ever, he thought, if I would but join with bim, we might 
together be abl^ to covitrive fpinething that might fufnci- 
^ntly revenge him. But 1 knew it was not for little Dpgs 
to attack great ones, and much leKs for Pages to meddle 
with thol^ Officers that were above them, who had all 
Power over them, and might revenge their Railleries as 
they pleasU I liKewife confider'd I had been pardon'd fbi 
my Saucinefs to the Secretary, becaufe what I did was to 
levenge my felf 3 whereas this was another M^n's Qjianei, 
and that made the Cafe different. However, the great 
J^vc I bore the Uflier, and the mortal Hatred I had ta 



"Book III. of Guzman d'Alfilifachc. 4251 

rlie Secretary, together with the natural Inclination I had 
to play TricKSj carried it ahore all other ConCdcratibns s 
inlbiDUch, that I immediately promised the Uflier to affift 
Iiim to the utmoft of my Power, providing he would fay 
nothing, and fcem to have put up the Affront. The Secre- 
tary verily believing he had forgot all, did not trouble his 
Head about the Matter ; but tno' he lecm'd to be a-flccp, I 
was awake ;^ and having provided my felf widi a little Ko- 
fi ti, Frankiruzenfe and Maftick^ I poynded and fifted thcQi 
all together, till I had brought them to be as fine as Meal. 
This done upon a Spanijh mi-Day, that was very hot, 
when I knew the Seaetary would have a great deal of Bu- 
iinefs upon his Hands, I went to his Appartment aboiit 
Nine in the Morning, and finding only nis Man in the 
Outer-Room, I faid to him, Honeft Jacobs if thoU haft a 
mind to have a good Breakfaft, find me but a Bottle of 
WinCj and rll nelpthec to an excellent Steak, whidi I 
. have ready grill'd below. Jacob hearken'd to my Propofiil, 
and promis d to be of iny Mcfs, defiring me to wait a lit- 
tle in his Room in cale his Maftef Inould call, and ha 
would go fetch the Wine. This Was all I wanted ; for he 
was no fooher gone, but I took his Maftet's Breeches that 
hun«; upon the Chair, he being us'd to write without in 
hot Weather, and ftrew'd my Powders all over the infidc 
of them ; which done, I put them in the fame Place where 
I found them. Jacob returned with.his Bottle • but juft at 
wc were going to Breakfaft his Matter chancd to all, fo , 
tliat I was fore d to go and eat clfewhere. I refolv'd ncver- 
thelefs to wait the Succefs of my Rogtiery, which did not 
(hew it felf till Noon, when the Secretai^. Was tb drcfi 
himfelf to appear before his Effrinenct. He had flay'd lb 
long, he was oblig'd to put on his Cloath? in hafte^ which 
made for my Stratagem, for heating himfelf, and Iweatitig 
with too great Action, my Powders took the better effoS 
However for the prefent he (At nothing * but was no 
fooner comft into the Hall, where his Emtnence din'd with 
a great Company, but he found himfelf uneafie ; and as 
he" was naturally as hairy as a Bear, he felt feveral Twitches 
that went to me Heart of him. He could not imagine 
what was the Matter^ yet durft not put his Hand in his 
Breeches for fear ot oeing feen, neverthelefs knew xiot^ 
how to keep his Countenance hs was fo plaguily tonnentea/ 


^6 The Ufe and Anions Parti 

At longdu Sx lis greater Misfortune, his Eminence^ vrbo 
" bad fbcneaiing to iky to him relating to the Poft of that 
.DiaYy beckon d to him to come to him. He went inunedi- 
.ately ; but Xbc Gurdinal bad not fpoke two Words, befcur, 
intemipting his Difcourie, he cry'd. Good God ! jy7icoU^ 
What IS the matter widi you ? What makes you fb fmell 
lOf an oddiort of Perfume ?^ All the Company fineit the 
lame, but they knew not whence it came. Nicola blufli'd, 
and nardly knew what Anfwer to make ; but at length 
he confefe'dy he fmelt the fame Thing himielf* yet could 
not think it came from him, having been near nothing of 
that Scent all Day : But as he began to ^row wanner, the 
Smell encreas'd, lo that his Eminence^ being not able to en- 
dure him any longer^ bid liim wimdraw, and he would 
talk with him after Dinner. Forhis part, who could not 
beUeve he had been the Caufe of all that ill Scent, he re- 
tired contentedly ; but when he felt himfelf pric& d and 
twing'd, as it were with a Pin or Needle, he knew not 
what to think : yet when he came near any of us, accord- 
ing as we had nad Inftru<9dons from die Gentleman-Uflier, 
we fled from him, holding our Nofes. Thofe aL Table (tid 
the like when he came near them ; but at length all 
palsM over in Raillery, and gave only Occafion for fome 
ihort Parallel Stories. At laft, his Eminence observing 
our Uiher laugh'd more than ufually, and that we fre- 
quently whiiper'd one another in the bar, he began to fuf- 
pe£l i}fiit was (bmething more than ordinary in the Cafe ; 
wherefore feeing me near him, who did not laugh at all, 
but look'd demurely, he ask*d me. What was the Matter^ 
and what made us intrigue fo together ? I told his Eminence, 
Mr. Secretary had that Day taken a Tuq>entine Potion, and 
that I fuppos'd made the People fo merrv. This made the 
Com^ny laugh yet more heartily than oefore; which put- 
ting Signior Nicola ouite out of Countenance, who now 
began to think fome Koguifh Trick had been play'd him, 
being no longer able to keep the Field, he would have been 
cone. But as he was about to retire, his Eminence^ who 
had really Bufinefs with him, calfd to him a (econdtime 
to (bv ; neverthelefs he could not talk with him but 
with his Nofe in his Handkerchief, which confounded our 
Secretary to the laft Degree ;io that having ftood the whole 
' Laugh of the Table for fome time, he at tengtb turn d his 

H ' . Bfi* 

Book IlL of Guzman d'Alfarachc 43 1 

Back, and went off in great haflc, not carine to fey to 

hear what his Eminence md further to fay, wnich diverted 

them yet more than before. He was no iboner gone, ' but 

the Cardinal was told what the matter was, which he Was 

very dcfirous to inow, and which he had no (ooner 4ieard^ 

but he was ready to bur ft widi Laughter, as was indeed all 

the reft of the Company. His Eminence fent one of his Sc^ 

vants to fee how this Farce was like to end, but he would 

let ho Body come in ; for he fliiit the Door after him as 

foon as he nad entered his Chamber, and would not befeen 

any more all that t)ay. But it was afterwards known, by 

means of his Servant, that it coft hiin the whole Lining of 

his Breeches, if not fome of his ^n, to get clear. He 

foon came to know I had played' him this Trick ; and he 

^ould have been feverely reveng'd of me for i^ had not 

his Eminence interposed, and charg'd him not to injure mc 

upon any Account whatfoever. 

The Two Months I was to be banifii*d ftom the PagA 
Chamber being expired, I was reftor*d to my firft Honour 
and Dignity, and admitted to wait on his Eminence ssho^ 
fore. I acquitted my fclf, as I had always done, with Im- 
pudence enough ; for it was a long whirle fince I had fhook 
Hands with Shame. You have no doubt heard the fhort 
Story of the Air, Earth, and Shame, who having kept 
Company together for fome time, and being at length o- 
blig d to part,were defirous to know where they ihould fee 
one another ?^gain. Qyodi the Air, I ftiall be found on 
the Tops of the Mountains ; and I, "without fail, reply'di 
the Water, in the Entrails of the Earth : You are both 
happy, faid Shame, that you can be found anv where 5 ftwr 
when once I luve been parted with^ it is impoilible to meet 
with me again. For my part, I did not look after her coy 
Ladyfhip, fince flie was fo hard to come at, for I knew her 
to be .a troublefome Gueft, and good fornothing. He that 
knows nothing of her, may afiinn the Town is his own. 
You will wonder neverthelefs, how, after fomany Inftanceg 
of my bad Conduct, I have not beccxme more wife. God 
keep every Man ftom fuch an Inclination to Roguery -as I 
had, which was rooted in me by a Habit of many Year% 
and confirm*d by a Series of Good and Evil, which accom- 
panied me continually ; for it muft be nesct to a Miracle to 
reclaim fuch a one as I was. You might have as well bid me 


41 « The Lift and AWons Part 1 

dirow my (elf Indloogdf from Ci/^/ ^r. jif^eh; ki not to 

eiy tbc Rogue oc Pilii^. I wa$ very ftniiblc wKat wbiild 
ppcn to 1SIC9 if I wcTie caught ft^Iing a fixdpd time; 
but yet I comfprtcd my fclf with tliis laying, Thdi he th^t 
ftdts DtMb, dois mf dejervi t9 liveJ What fjenifics leaving 
a Takot, i£ wa don't make ufc of it fjjst Fools live like 
FbolSy nd Hen of Wit liln Men of wit. I will notherc 
grow rufty (os want of (bmething to do. .&try one knows 
what he's good for^ and erery oi>e has a Part to adi in this 
.World* I don't, neyerthelds, give yau th^ Hillory of my 
life that you may follow it^ but rather that you may avoid 
it aspermcious and (la^geuHi& ' His Zmnewcj as you have 
already heard^ was a great Lovjer of Sweetmeats, and when- 
ever his Stock was out, he wpuld fend to buy more. He 
commonly boudbittfacne that came from the Camriej in Bar^ 
. n^ The old Casks were given to the Servant£!| ^nd I bd 
one fell to my Share, wherein I us'd to p;ut fooiie Trifle or 
ocfaer. It bapppn'd one Pay, a Mw came tp a^aint his 

fmmnce there were freili Sweetmeats ^mf d, and only 
welve Barrels of them. He fent i^mti^iatel^ to have 
than bought up fi>r his Ufe. I lipr^ng this, laid within 
iny fejf, It ihaUgo hard jbnit I will have one of them ; fo 
gDmg into my Chambei^ that fame Moment, I empty'd the 
Barrel I had of what was in it ; and having fiird it again 
with Earth j|nd Straw, clos'd it up fo neatly, that you 
would have fworn it had been new, and^nevq: openU 
This done, I went into the Court- Yard to wait the com- 
ing of thcde that were full of Sweetmeats. I did not f^y 
long be&ir^ they came. Jhi Steward had Jthe Qmge (£ 
tfaems aMad he no fooner iaW ^m brougjtf |n^ hixi h^pifh 
us Orders to carry them into his Emine/xte'^ Cio&t. yfc 
were Hands enoueh for that ; and I iJp brder'd the Matter, 
that I was JCo march h&. 1 teia'd m^ j^rirel after die refi; 
and as I was to pafs b^ my Cbtinher in gpiig to this 
Clofet, it was an eafie matter fcur ine, qo Bmjr toUowi^ig 

us. to flip afide^ and^ ei^^hange miM for th^ I had prgnr d; 
which I did, carrying it boldly into theCloiet w^h (lie 

refl, and (etting it down bc|iye the Stctvard, wlprould, I 
thou^t, Iw Wit^cis for me if Occaiioh were. His $mintnc^ 
commeat the fameti|i>^ to fee thefe Barrels^ he 3ad po 
fooner look'd upon them, but he cafl his Eye upon V^ 
^hom he found very attentivji an^ frid^ Imifing, WcU 

Book III. o[ Guzman d'AIfarach^. 49 1 

(jHzman^ haft thou any thing to fey to theft Barrels, as 
formerly to the Chcft? My Lord, reparteedl, nothing k 
iinpoflible. Ah ! rcply'd he immediately^ but I dcfie tfiec. 
Theft Barrels have not Corners to lift up as the Cheft had. 
That's tru^, my Lord, reply*d I j but I huiqbly bcfccdi 
YoutEmnence not to defie me m any things for the Devil 
may in fuch Cafe tempt me to ao fomething extraordinary. 
With all my Heart, quoth the Cardinal, T would fain fee 
what thou can It do, I give thee Eight Days to do it in ; 
and if thou art Artift enough to rob me or any of thexu 
in that time, I here promise not only to forgive thtc what 
thou (halt ip get, but ta give thee a Reward to boot 
But their^ continued he, thou muft oblige thy ftlf HIk- 
wife to iome Penalty, in cafe thou miftarry'ft in thy Etii^ 
terprize. Whatever mail pieafe your Eminence^ ttp^j^li 
But Eight Days for {q skilful a Perfon as I am, fcems a lit* 
tie too much. Scarce one of my Comrades but wou}4 b^ 
able to do it in Four : Formypart,! would undertake to do 
it in Twenty four Hours. Twenty four Hours, rcp!y*d his 
JEminence^ looking earneftly at me with great Alloniftunent I 
Yes, my Lord, reply'd I, Twenty four Hours j and if I 
do not accompliih niy Task in that Time, I am willing to 
fubmit to what Punifhment Mr. Secretary there will pkaft 
to ivSidi on me for my Prefumption, having no realqn to 
doubt bi^ he would give me fuch as I (hould delervei 
I ! reply'd the Secretary; Til have nothing to dp with you. 
His Eminence may find thoft that have ftron^er Arms than 
I have to give you your Delerts. The Cardinal, who ba4 
hardly ceas d laughing during this who(e Dialogue, now 
began to redouble his Laughter, feeing how afraid tl;^ 86? 
cretary was of me. The Conclufion of the Mattes* |V^ 
That I ihould accompliih this Undertaking in Twenty lour 
Hours, or be contented to undergo a liiitable PunithmcDt^ 
I coniented, for you may imagine ^ was un4!Pr po Apprct 
,;.henfions abput it, having the Barrel already Ia& in piy 
r Chamber. 1 adk'd Twenty four Hours, 'tis true ; put that 
l^*was only the better to amufe the Carainal| that h; nughf 
tnot tlunlc 1 had a Familiar, liow many Guards di4 hf 
liet fucceffively vpon thisCloiet ; Th^r^ waa alivays one 
iFage or other there, and ever fuch as were xnpft fOpiiUcd 
in. His Eminence obferving next Day at Dinner I did npt 
\f9^\ » Wordj 9^4 was opt ib md-a-m^ a^ } \^%^ IP 

454 ^^^ ^'/<? <'*^ ASliom Part I. 

be, in faying fomctliing to dirert him ; he cry'd^ Well^ 
Gfifunan^ the Hour is n^r at hand, and thou look'ft as if 
thou had*il the Stripes upon thy Back al.ready. I (hall only 
be at a Lofs to find one that is abfe to Reward thee as thou 
tr ilt defer vc, fince Signior Nicola will not take that Trouble 
jxpoti him. I am furc of vaj Hand (oi all that, cry I, 
my Lord, and fear neither Signior Nicolas Arm, nor any 
otners. The Sweetmeats are already in my Po&flfion, and 
I have no'rcafon to be afraid ef lofingiiay Wager. ,Hi3 
Eminence took only what I faid for 9 Specimen of my Impu- 
dence,, being thoroudily perfuaded that no Body could 
have entered his Clolet, or touch'd thjs Baiirels; He theie- 
fore only laugh'd at me, and rallied.ime all pfinner-tiine a* 
bout the Flogging that was defignd for me. I took little 
notice of wliat he laid, ^nd did not pretend to defend my 
fclf 5 but when the Time for fcrring ilp the i^rrcame, I 
fljd. privately up to my Chamber^ and taking ^ tl^nna Biaibn, 
fiird it with Sweetmeats -out ^ my Barrel,^ ^nd carried 
. them to the Table. Nevftr -vtae furprife fo great as that of 
his Eminence at this Sight. He look a upon the Sweetmeats, 
and afterwards upon me, with greatEarndftnelfe. He knew 
not what to thin^ of it 5 but, the better to fatisfie himfelf,^ 
he immediately diiipatch'd away, his Steward,- to fee if ^e 
Barrels were entire, and of the fanie-Nsmber they 
£rfi The Steward, who had plac'd them hiin^^ fo:und 
them ^s he had left thetn, fafe and ibimd^ wd lb went 
and acquainted the Cardinal, who was now upon the 
Whippmg-ftrain again. I perceive, Friend GusLmdn^ what 
thy Fetch is now,proceeded lie : Thou haft been and bou^t 
fome Sweetmeats . of the fame Merchant J bought o^ 
pLud, thou think'ft to fob them upon .pc for mine; but 
thou art miftaken, I am not tp be fobbed off" fo : Ifll make 
thee Itand to thy Wager, or thcJtt ftialt be laftxd. No- 
diing is more jult, teply I, my iotd j siifti if ttefe are 
not the fame Sweetmeats your Ewmme bwght^ I ha¥C loft^ 
and deferre your Difplcafure ;' Ivit if they .^re Qut;cf one ot' 
the lame Barrels, tlien I hope your Emmvi^ will do mc 
Juftice. Tliis brought the Cardinal from oneSurprife to 
another 5 inlbmiich, that looking earncftiy 2^t mc, he ery*d, 
Here is no E\raCon of fly Fetch to be admitted of, €htzMa». 
SiVe know the Number of the Barrels; and my Steward, 
fflK) had the Q^arge of them,, has ,been ;u(l telling diem, 



t III. (if Guzrtian d^Alfarachc. 455 

^nd finds tjiem to be the fii&e Number they were at firft« 
t believe it, my Lord, anfwerU i, but your Bmm%ct know^ 
the Proverb telatine to count^ Sheep. We'll fee that 
quickly^ reply'd the Cardinal; Let U5 but dine Srfl; and 
ive'li giVe the Comedy afterwards. Every one was impa- 
tient to kno'*'- the End of all this. The Tabk was po foonet 
voided, but nis Eminence would needs go himfclf, and iki 
how Things flood in the Clofet. He carry'd all the Com- 
pany along with him jhat din'd with him that Day, that 
he might give them"" feme Diverfion. When they came 
thithen they found all the Twelve Barrels fafe and found 
as the Steward had faid. Wtll, Gujcman, What doft thou 
fay now, (juoth the Cardinal immediately, Here are th« , 
Twelve Barrels fafe and found as we left them. As for 
their being Twelve, I have nothing tb fay. My Lord, an- 
fwer*d I, 1 can fee that plainly enough ; but aS for their 
being all fa& and found, 1 much queflion it The Car- 
dinal being willing to have himiejif fiitisfy*d in that Parti- 
cular likewife, would have had them all prefently opcn'd ; 
but I being defirous to fave him that Trouble, pointed to 
th it I would have vifited, and fo excused the reft. I de- 
fir'd Leave, at the fametime, to go and fetch that which I 
had in mv Chamber, which was granted. But how great 
was the Surprife of his Eminence^ when he faw the firft 
Barrel opend, and nothi&g but Dirt and Straiv found 
there, and afterwards perceived ine coming with the other 
Barrel above half fuU of Sweetmeats. He own d this laft 
Fetch exceeded his Imagination* and that he could not com- 
prehend it. All the rett of tne Company were likewife 
equally aflonifti'd ; but at length their Surjprile gave way ' 
to Mirth^ and they fell xfy Laudung and }eiting as before. 
That however would not fiiti^ae me, X demanded anotbci' 
Barrel of Sweetmeats I bad woo, and his Eminence ordered 
them to be given me. TJiea to fhew what I did was only 
to divert his Emtmme^ and not with any Defign to get ano- 
ther Barrel, for wlut \ already had was «»oMh for jny U% 
i diflributed this fecond B^cjjel among my Comrades. Hid 
Eminence extreamly appr^'d my Generolity 5 but whatever' 
, Fleafiice he took in my T^ck^^. he fgond I had too much 
. Cunning for a young Man, and f^d the ill Conlequenoe» 
of it. ne thought me too Bad i^ his Family, which had 
none but^ honett People in it i for \\t would inner x^Qpdwt^ 

F f a and 


43^ The Life arut Anions Parti 

and he would no doub( have Cafliired me that very Mo- 
ment, but that he took pity of me, and apprehended, if he 
abandoned me, I might come to Ruin, ivhich would after- 
wards be great Concern to him. He therefore refolv'd to 
letain me out of Charity,- that he might have an Opportu- 
nity to teach me better, and prevent, if poflible, my utter 


Guzman ffeaks of Charity in relation to the Cardinal; 
and tbenjhews the Inconveniencies ifMafiers being ovir^ 
rigorous and unkind to their Servants. He next tells 
you another Theft of bisy and how 'well be eame off. 
Afterwards he froceeds to treat of Gaming^ and fhcws 
tie Rogueries of it. Here he tells a fleafant Story ; 
and at lajf, having recommended fome Laws for Ga- 
ming y acquaints you bow he was difmifsd the Car- 
dinars Service^ and on what Condition be was to rt" 
turn into it.. 

nrHere never was a better Noblemath nor a better Maftcr, 
^ than this Cardinal. I have eliewhere difcours'd of 
Charity largely enough i yet I muft here beg leave to add 
a Word or two more concerning it, in relation to this Prc- 
kte, who was Charity and (joodneis it &lf. Charity 
obliges us to love our Slants, and have the lame Care of 
them we have of our Children : An Example hereof we 
have in this good Prelate, which ought to charm all fuch 
as have any Notion of loving their Neighbour. He thou^t 
of ail the Ways imaginable to alter my bad Couric of tife, 
and ipar'd no Fains to make me tsdce to the Road of Vir- 
tue ; yet his Methods of Reclaiming were gentle, and not 
violent, which would but have frightned m^ and never 
wrought upon my Inclination. It was not his ChaiaSer 
to threaten or punifh, but to proceed by the mildeft Means 
that could be ; fuch as Infbruction, Remonftrances, Kind- 
nefles, and the like. When he was at Table, and foncy'd I 
had a mind to any Bit there, be would be lure to give 

- - '" ^ it 

Book III. 0/ Guzman d^Alfaracha 437 

it me "with fbine Jeft or other ; as he did toe Day^ when 

he gave me a piece of excelJent Pafty. Here, Guz^an^ 

faid iie, take tliis as an Earneft of my good Will, and for 

Contintiance of our Peace, for I would not willingly hare 

any Diflcrence with thee. I am not braver than Sjgnior 

Nicda $ and befides, have but too much reafon to be afraid 

of nw Sweetmeats. Thus he pleased himfelf in Rallyine 

and }eiting with his Servants whatever Company was' witn 

him. He lodk'd upon them all as his Children, he treated 

them accordingly, and they ferv'd him rather as a common 

Father than Mafier. No Children could liave more Affe- 

6lion for their Parents, than they fhew*d lor him upon all 

Occafions. Thofe People that have Servants, know not 

what they do when they treat them haughtily and rigCK 

roufly ; uiey had much better have none at all, for it would 

be more to their Omtent Servants are Men like other 

Folks J ufe them well, and they'l ferve you well ; abu^ 

them, and theyl abuk you. Sudi as the Malter is^ fo is 

commonly die Servant. This is a Proverb nioft oroper for 

us. If you pay him ill, and cheat him of his Wages, hel 

befure ta cheat you whenever: h^ has an Opportunity. 

If you mifufe him within Doors, he will not fail to do 

the like by you without. If you ruflSe him with hard 

Words, he won t fparc your Charafter when it comes to 

his Turn. If yon fion*t love him, hel be fure to hate you. 

In a word, as there is nothing better than a good Servant 

therie is nothing worfe than a bad ; and 'tis to the Matters 

rfiat either Qiiality muft be afcribU They are commonly 

fuch as they make them, or they deferve to have. The 

beft Servant in the World will become a Ro^ue with a 

bad Mafler, and the worft may be reform d with a 


Much about this time, a great Cheft of Sweetmeats was 
brought his Eminence from uenoa. They were finer, better 
gilded, and more neatly put up than thofe before ; vet ha- 
ving ukcn Wet, they were damag d, and had occafion to 
be dried. His Eminence having viewed them with a great 
deal of Pleafure, and the rather becaufe Aey came from 
one o£ his Relations, who was accuflom'd to fend him 
fome Yearly, had a mind to have them laid a drying iq 
fome Place where I might not get at them, but he raew 
not where« and tfaeirefose confulted every Body about it. 

Ffj Eafb 


The Life and Anions Part I. 

Each Pcrfon gave his Advice (ingle, but no Body would 
tkkc the Charge of them. , After having confider*d fomc 
time, his Bminence thought he had fopnd out a better Me^ 
thod to prcferve them tfon any Body j and vrldt (houI4 
that be, bpt to cntnift me my felf with them. I was at 
that time out of the Houfe, and return d jiift as they were 
debating about this Contrivar , fo that his Eminence no 
Iboncr law jne, but he cryM, We are at a lofe, Gwcmdn^ 
where to lay thefe Sweetmeats a drying, for they have 
pccafion for it, and I am very much afraid of the Rats. 
if your Ewinence, reply'd I, will but pleafe to entruft me 
and my Comrades with them, we'll take Cjrc the Rats 
rtian't come at them. I believe ap much, reparteed his 
Eminence laughing, but I ihould get notning by that. 
t have ha(l Thoughts, Guz,m4ny added he, to lecure Aera 
from the Rats, thy Companions, and efpecially frprti thy 
felf, by putting diem under thy Care, that thou may'ft lay 
fhem every pay out in the Sim, ana, above all, lee that 
thy Companions don*t touch them. But this is no Jeffing- 
Matter, proceeded he ; they Ihall be giv^n thee out by TaJe, 
and in like mariner will be requir'd of thee again. Thoii 
fee'ft in what Condition they now are, and be liire thou 

{eftor*ft them ip' the fame Plight thou receiv'ft thciiL 
f thou fiiirfl: in any Particular, thou di{pbligeft me for ever. 
Your Eminence , reply I , puts ine upon a very great 
Temptation. I can arifwer for fccuring your Sweetmeats 
from the Rats my Companions, but frpm my felf I cannot. 
I am, my Lord, the Son of Eve*, and if I am planted in 
^ fort of fweet Paradife, Iknow not but fome Conicrve 
jpf Genoa may chance to tempt me. Do as thou wilt, 
reply'd the Cardinal, who could hardly fpea^^ any more for 
laughing^ but tliou mpft be the Guardian of them, and 
fee thou reltore tKein in the fame Condition thou fbund'ii 
them, or it will be the worfe for thee. ' If that be all, 
yeply I, my Lord, I undertake it. I will be lure to r^^ 
ftore thepi m the lame Condition I find them, of at leaft 
no Body fhall b^ able to find me out' if I eat ahy of than. 
Very well, be it fd, reply 'd his Emirfence ; It thou art 
Artitt enpuch for that, I forgive thee trithaflrnyjfcart; 
jt)ut if thy Roguery happens to be difcover'd, thorr fnalt be 
alTuredly |ai(h'd: I undertook the Charge on thefe Terms j 
a|i4 that very Day |aid them put tp dry in the Gallery, 

Book in. (/ Guzman d*AIfatachc^ 45^ 

one Box after another, they beino; Jndeed the fineft Sweetr 
meats I ever faw. When I bad fo done for feveral 
Days fucceffively, and they began to be dry enough, I was 
thinking how I mould do to get a Siacc for my lei/, with- 
out running any Rifoue. I thought the jpropereft way 
would be, to turn up tne Botes and take off the Bottoms, 
which I did^ by drawing forth tht Nails gently with a 
Knife ; and then having taken out what I wanted, and 
fill'd up the void Spaces yirith Paper, I clos'd them up again 
as neatly as they were at firft. I ferv'd only Four fo, con- 
tenting my felf with thofe only for the j eft's fakcc At 
Night, when his Eminence was giving a Collation, I came 
to him, and told him, I thought the Sweetmeats weredry'd 
enough, and therefore they might well be clos'd up. He 
ask'd me if they were ail fafc. I anfwer'd, I believ'd no 
Body could find to the contrary if they were not. ,He 
vvould needs fee them ; and fo I and Three of my Compa- 
nions went and brought each of us a Box to him. They 
happened to be the very Four deficient Boxes I had made 
the Experiment upon ; and when 1 thought I had an Qp- 
portunity to fpcak, T ask*d his Eminence^ if I had acquitted 
my felf well of my Charge, or not. He look'd very nar- 
rowly upon them, c«amin*d them on all Sides, and at laft 
was fore d to eonfefs, he thought they were as they were at 
firft. Neverthelefs, to be fure/ he afek'd the Standers-by 
what they thought of them. They look*d more narrowly 
than he- had done, and to be certain would have been 
glad to have pick*d a hole in my Coat yhut when they had 
done their utmoft, tliey were in like manner obliged to 
own, they could not fee any thing wanting in tlK)fe" Four 
Boses. They mtift then needs go and vifit the others^ 
which I had not touch'd, and to be fure they could find 
nothing miffing there ; fo that his Eminence at length de- 
clared, if I had rpbb'd him he would freely forgive me, 
fmce there was not the leatt Appearance of it, and I had 
dotte *it dextroufly. Hearing this, I went and brought 
thofe I feid ftolen in a Balon, und prefented t^em to iiis 
Emotnce, protcftihg- J had not ta{fed a Bit of them* which 
indeed tvas true. ' He was wonderfully furprisd, and 
would needs know how I came at them ; I fliew*d him ; 
and the rett 'of the Night ti'^as fpent jn Railleiy upon this 

iiib/cet. r was now look'd upon irlf Otjr Family as no- 

Ff 4 > tlijf^g 

J^4d f^ ^tf^ ^^ AHitins fktt t 

thin;; iefs tluin a ju^ler or Hoem-Vocus Man, and every 
Body was fo afraid ot mq diat where I came they iircrepic^ 
fciitfy upon their Guard. We had Four Hours allc^v^d us 

gcry Day for Study, Two in the Morning, afid Two after 
ihncr,to learn Ldtin and Gretl^ of both which, by my Ap- 
))lieation, i had acquired a competent Knowledge. Tnc 
tcft bf oiir Time, and when wc were not employed in 
Editing on his Eminence^ we fpent in reading diverting 
Boola.' learriingto Sing, and fometimes t0 Game^ whicn 
laft KecroLtion I was a little more perfed in than was ne- 
ccHkry. If we ivent abroad, it was only fot ibme Oiort 
tiiiie Xh viCt the (jingerbread*man whom! always robb'd, 
or tht Paflry-Cook who always robb*d us. Sometimes 
tve would give Serenades and cold Treats to the Ladies of 
our Neighbourhood^ but then we were fain to be Cau** 
tiou^ ; f6t if hi^ Emtnepicf had come to know it^ aU$he Fat 
would havi^ been in the Fire. Thus I fpent iome Years of 
iny Youth $ and when I cajptie to be olderi I grew never 
the tvilet You'l eafily believe this, when I fliall tell you^ 
that tho' I liv'd fo happily with this Lprd, who had all 
the Kindnefs for me imaginable) and much beyond the Pe^ 
fert of luch a poor Rogue as 1 was^ I ilill thirfted after 
the life bf a Beggar,^ which I looked upon 9^ thouiand 
times mote agreeable than that 1 led hi this Palace, be** 
caufe a Beggar ^ life had Libeity^ which I Wanted, and b^ 
liev'd no Condition could be happy without it. More^ 
over findilig I had now a Beard, and was fit to wear a 
Sword* t cryd. What ! lliall I be a Page all my Life long^ 
and iiv^ in a Moufe-Trap! io my extrava^nt Ddires 
tnade mc to call my noble Lord's Palace. It is high time 
to Ibok put, and leek to make my Fortune. I ilvas in a 
Place proper enou^ for that, if 1 would have been my 
own Friend, and tak^n right Meafures ; but I muft have 
Jny Vagaties^ and foljovir my own Fancy 3 I could not be 
con^i^'d* but mtift tread in a Path that led dirc6tly to 
Ruin. I had been fo acqiftom'd to Play^ that now I could 
not leaVe it ; ihlbihijch, that at length negleAing all my 
Duties, ahd nbt fihding Gamefters high enough fo trA 
withih Dobr^) I vvpiild needs go abroad^ and were not 
fceH fopietime$ folr a ij^hole t>aV together^ and oftentimes 
Ibft the very Shirt from mjr Back* As I was luturally not 
6ve^fcru jpulotiS|I iyal |^fs lb in Gat^ing tlian a^y thing elfe, 


Book HI. tf Guzman d'Alfarache^ 44 i 

for I would win any Body's Money if I could, tho' ncvef 
Ho un&irly. Sometimes indeed I did win, btit oftncr loft • 
for as I play*d with every one I met, I could not fail or 
meeting many times with thofe that were too cunning for 
tnc, who would get more of me at one throw, than per- 
haps I had got in twenty. I Was skiird above aU at Pri- 
merOj tvhich was a Game then very itiuch in Voeue • and 
knew how to j^ve my felf Three Cards when 1 fhould 
have but Two if I wMs to Deal, and afterwards Two in- 
ftcad of o|ic ; fb that having Five in my Hand^ I would 
let Two Aide down gently under my Feet, and play with 
the other Three that to be fure were the beft. At other 
times, I would take the third Card^ and clapping it under-^ 
neath, fee whether it were good for me or not ; and in an 
Infiant look on the other already feen, and fo make my 
Advantage of them. But theft were but final I Tricks : 
t^ever was Man more Wroi^ than I in flipping a Card, and 
no Body ever underftood turning a Game all of a fudden fo 
well as I. I would have the fli^ Card ready in my Sleeve, 
and when I gave the Cards to my Antagonift to cut, and 
received them again, I would flily flip tiiat Card Where I 
thought fit to place it. How cAen had I a Friend fit by 
sne, KX^ as we call him in Spain^ a DeatoH^ and in France^ 
a Crmtpkr^ who would lean upon the Table as if he were 
afleep, and yet give me under it fuch Cards as I wanteds 
A:t other times^ I had a Perfon that would be continually 
i/valkin^ round the Room where weplay'd, who by Singing, 
Whiftling, Dumb Signs, oi: fome other fuch like Token 
agreed on between us, would give me notice how the Game 
iiood. How often would I fo pack the Cards, that I 
ivould deal to him that played againft me Two and fifty, 
and having an Ace to help me, would make my lelf Five 
and fifty> or elfe with a Five encounter Four and fifty, 
whereby I fliould either win the Game by one Peep, or by 
the elder Hand. I have known People a great deal more 
expert and dextrous at thefe Matters^ in fome Particulars, ' 
tmn my felf^ whde Secrets, fhould I tell you them, would 
fill a large Volume. I have alio known even Churchmen en«» 
^ge in this Myftery • but for Perfons of Qjiality and 
Pnnces, it was a common thing tp.have them of our Fra- 
ternity, and I could name feveral if I pleased. But let us 
^ thele Qhurchmen, how they bdbave th^mfelves when 


'44> ^ ^fi ^ ASthfii Fart I. 


they fit as Beaeoris. Why, the^ fit in their little black 
Cloak», and when tbey have Ojpportcmity, (Itde a falfe 
Card into your Hand, if you are of Intclttgence wiA 
lihsxsL They so to fMnous Ordinaries, where youne Scran- 
ce»eat. on purpofe to dmw them in to pby, where a 
uiird. Sharper will be fure to be found to en^ge them. 
Other Matters of thi» kind are undeirftood adrmrsu>ly welt 
W th^ OentlemeA Mfith the littk Bands, who will not 
wt K>.brte your Head off! if fou hare any diing to do 
with tlietn. As for the Ladi^s^ diey are as frequently as we 
Y^^eA. with thi^ Peftilencej and being naturally more fub* 
)e^ to t^afTioli, when once Gaming has taken roflfeflion of 
themii v<5u ne^er find thctfi reclami'd. They break thro' 
all Di^culues to gratifie that Inclitiation ; fo that a Man 
that can't prevail over hi« Miftrefs's Virtue, needs only 
teach her to phy^ and he (hall do what he pleafes with hen 
Here occdts a Storv I muft needs teH you on thisOccafi(»i : 
I warrafit it for Tnith, becauie I knew' the Peribns who 
weipe the Subje^ of it. A Gentleman, one of the mofl" 
Gonfiderabk of hia Protince, and who had Qualities fuff^ 
cient to recommend hitn to the whole World, happened 
to be enamour'd of a Lad^' ^^^ ^^ (^^ handfcnxieft cHF die 
City where fhe liv d, but in Meters of Eiove a very L#- 
^etidj at lea ft in Appearance, for £he fofitr'd abundance 
d her Admirers to due as it were at her Feet: This made 
ter paf^ fer one of more thaa ordinaty Virtue, her Lorcis 
being all Perfons of ei(traordtnary Merit and great Accom- 
^iihoiems. Our Lover, however,, of whom I am fpeak^ 
Hig, Was not difcourag-d for all this. He fancy'd he mould 
be happier than any of tlirfe, tho* lie liad not, it may be, 
the fame Defcrt, fince he knew Women to be whimficat, 
and not to continue long; in tlie lame Mind. He knenv fhe 
lov'd Play ; and akho' iJhe was not fo much addicted to 
it as .forae W(Mncn are, in regard to her Husbandfs Intereft 
aad her own ReputaCion, yet Ihe did not hr\ fomet'mves 
to tofe large Sums. T^o* he did not love Gaming him- 
ieifyaklk>he could vety well atford it, being exceeding 
rich; yj9l confideriog ^that Women love naturally to get 
by Pl%; he, thouf^ iti would be attacking her in her 
weake^.Part, to play Avith and lofc to her. He tum'd 
then Gamefter all of a fudfden, and got into all thofe Sets 
^h^rf ihf was^ and.wouid^aspft^nas be could, chufe to 


Book III. of Guzflaan d^Alferache. 443^ 

play tvith her alone, tliat flte mi^t have the foie Benefit 

of nis Lofings : But as be had not been in the leaft us'cf 

no Gamingjand tho' he had ftudy 'd thofe Gatnes he knew hi$ 

!Miftrefs delighted in, he wa$ not over-well sktUxi ift them^ 

ihc out of a gicnerous Hunionr, not common whh Woincn, 

refos' d to play with hiin, 'betaufe fhc was fere to win, 

siay one Day told htm as ii:fcrch. Our Lorer finding hi^ 

Hopes crofed this wav, was fain to have Recourse to otners, 

nay/ try'd all Ways tmt a Kfan paffionatiely in love, a^ h^ 

was. could think of, to betid the ftubbotn Hdart of m deaf 

Mirads. Thie whole Town t»«re Witnefes of hi* Conffency. 

Afliduity and Fidelity, yet all prov'd Fruhlefg*, fo that h| 

liT^d in a manner in Etefpair^ and confequenrtly fou^t 

all Means to rid himfelf of his eitorbitanc Paflion.' At 

Jength, however, good Fortune dcfigrfd to fmile on him, 

for one Day, when he Icatt thought of it, Wcard was 

brou^ him a Lady cklk'd to fpcak W4$h him. He knew 

not what this fhoutd mean, yet ordered fhe fhould be 

eondu6led in to him. He foon after few a Woman enter 

wiili her Hoods over her Face, pi^obibly f hdit (he might 

inot be known to his Servants. He took her Meaning, and 

inunediateiy ordered them to go out of his Chamber; 

which done, he came up to her^ and ask'd in what he 

could ferve, and what had brought her to his Lodging? 

She lifting up her Hoods, gate hrn t^ underfiand who flie 

was 5 and then he faw, with ^eat Surprife and Woncfcri 

fhe was his Miflrefs's Qnfidme and Waiting-Woman. 

Having paade him fome few Compliments on tne nart d[ 

her Lidy, fhe put a Lettej? kito hn Hands, whkh fne toi4 

him required a fpeedy Anfwer, He fcrupfcd to take it at 

fyH^ as not knowing wha« to think oF it, his Mif^eft 

having never done him the like Favour befoft ,• but at 

length he did venture upon it, and opct^ing it^ fotind the 

following Words. » 

** Of all the Friends I ever had, I will not % 1 ^v<t 
f^ lov^d you beft, becaufe I could never love any Body 
^ but my Husband 5 but that you are tlie Peribn I hav^ 
f ' always beft efteem'd is moft true, becaufe you are one 
^* on whofc Difcrction and .Goodncfe I could ever befl dc^ 
f^ pcnd. I liave npw Occafion for fuch a Friend ; I play'dN 



'444 7%e Ufe and ABions Pare I* 

** Ycflcmight a little more raihly than ordinary vtvii 

^ the Marquis of N , an unfuccefsful Rival of yours, 

^^ who I fuppofc thou^t to g^n my Heart by ruining my 
^ Fortune, and winning more of me dun I was able to 
** pay. It was ^0000 rraitcs ; but 'tis your love muft 
^ revenge me on his Malice. This is the Price of my 
^^ Favour : And if you don't think it too lu^h rated^ 
'^ as I truft you will not, if your former ProfeflSons were 
** fmcere, lay hold of this Opportunity to triumph over 
•* your Rival , who would have triumphed over my 
^^ Weaknefs, and to whom you owe the eood Fortune of 
^' thb Day. AflTift me only to fatisfie nim in another 
^^ manner than what he pretends tpu I am verily per- 
^ fuaded you are generous enough to do it without In- 
^* terett, but I care not to be indebted to any Body, and 
^^ ihouid be highly ungrateful, if after you have acauitted 
'^ your felf fo generouily to me, I ihould not do the like 
" 0^ you to my Power : To morrow I promis*d to pay 
^' tms Sum. Get but 50000 Francs ready againft Night, 
^' and ru draw a Bill upon the God of Love to repay you 
** with Intereft. This Letter will be your Pledge till you 
^ are.repajd, when you muft reftore it. Adieu till Night, 
f ^ -when Love will Have his Part to A&L 


This Letter had not all the £f&6l upon this Lover's 
Heart one might reasonably have expe^ed ; for tho* he 
had lov 'd this Lady with an incredible Paflion for a long 
while, and now law his Deiires like to come to a ha^^y 
Conclufion : yet being a perfef^ly honeft Man, }iis Lore 
began to leilen, when he round to what he was tp be in- 
debted for his Happinefs. He could not, I fay, above 
half Value how wnat he would have facrific*4 a thou- 
fand Lives for before, fince he iaw it offer'd at fo dieap 
a Purchale. Ncvcrtnelcfs, Love, which had for a long 
time taken deep Root in him, would not fuffer him to 
be ruVd by his Reafon,but eng^g'd him wholly to his Party, 
rendering nim in an inftant fucn as Lovers are wont to be 
on the Eve of their Happinefe, that is, altogether tran- 
fported with Expediation. He therefore took Pen, and 

wjrit the following Anfwer. 


Book III. cf Guzman d'Alfarache. 445 





^^ Whth an hbnifft Man has once parted with his Heart, 
his Purfe is wholly infignificant to him, I would wil- 
lingly owe your Favour to Love, rather tlian the Fortune 
of Play ; but from wliat Qiiarter foever it comes, .be a£- 
fur*d 'tis equally Welcome. As every thing in you is ex- 
traordinary, fo I find your manner of Loving is^ fince Ga- 
ming was tne firft ocaifion of it. \Ve Ihall now recon- 
cile Wo Thines that are the moft incompatible in Na- 
ture, and thofe are. Love and Play. I'll anlwer for the 
former, do you but make your felt Miftrefs of the latter, 
and there Imll not be in tne World two fiich happy Lo- 
vers as our felves. I die with Impatience for this Union ; 
but after fo many Years of Dcpedation, do not delay my 
Happinefs fince you are pleas'd toaffurc me of it, it you 
would have me capable of enjoying it. I fliall count 
all the Minutes, and to be iiire reckon them much longer 
than diey are till I fee you. How happy are you that ne- 
ver knew what it was to Cgh, but I mall be a thonfand 
times yet more happy if I can have but the good Fortune 
to teach it you^ and fince you fay Play has thrown you 

into the Arms of Love^ if I c^n but fecure you there. 

MicH my Hearths Dtlight. 

This Anfwer Aus writ he folded and ibi'd it, and ha- 
ving put it into the Hands of the Qnfdente to deliver to her 
Lady, he withal defir'd her to acquamt her he would not 
Ait out all diat Day in expedlation to hear further from her. 
When the Woman was gone, he no fooner found himfplf 
alone, but he be^n to read his Miftrcfs's Letter over and 
over a thoufand times, not being able to imagine what he 
{aw with his own Eyes, fo fingular the Adventure appeared 
to him. But when he came to refled): on the unfuccefsful 
Length of his Amour; and that at laft, when he leaft 
thought of it, his Milheis threw her felf into his Arms up- 
on account or a little Pique at Play, he was above once m 
the mind to have renounced all Commerce with her. She 
made him at laft fenfible, I lay, how fmall a Share he had 
in this Matter, and what a Woman's Heart was, whole 
Virtue he thoudit inflexible. But there was one Pafiage in 
this Letter whidb ftem'd yet ^c^ furprifins ^ ^^ ^^ 

44^ the Life ind ASlioni Fart 1 

that ms, that he was to tcftorc tlic BiBet after he had recci- 
Tcd his FaTmetit. , A Confidcratidn of that fort, after a 
Woman haa refign d her Honour, he fancied looka a little 
extraordinary, and fecui'd to foretei fome Defign upon him^ 
which he cculd not as yet comprehend. He thought vrhen 
a Town was once furrendefd, 'twas to little piurpofe to 
|;eep die Gates ihut^ and after the Principal was paid, it 
was necdlels to be fi:riipulous about the Intereft, Ilk belie- 
ved it would be but i»iid^^ ui hixn to have feme Sally- 
port to efcape at in cafe he found Treachery in the Place. 
This Device was to Copy tlie aforelaid Letter fb exadUy, 
that the true ooe rniebt not be known ftom it ; whkh be 
did^ and ieal'd and Broke it o^n again in like manner as 
1^ Ori$;inal had been. Hairing fo done^ be kept both fafe^ 
and fpent the renuinder of the Pay in getting together the 
30000 francs in Qc4d, and dre(&ng hirmelf^ whjcn he did 
after the moA ]^finificq)t banner imaginable. When 
Night came, which ne loQK'd uppn to be tnat of his Nup« 
lialsy^ he was fQmt for according to Piconulie, The On&lenti 
entering his Chaiiiber^ told him he was ftay'd for, and that 
her Lady was alreadv at the Place of Rende^ous. ^ told 
Iiim where it was, but requeued him in her Lady's Name 
to bring no Servants with nim^ not come in his own Coach 
for fear of Dii£€V«ry. The Gallant thought all thefc Pre- 
cautions hic;hly neceffary, and therefore told h«r^ fhc might 
aiTure her l^dy ]pe would be fure to obferve all her Com- 
mands pun6hiaily. The Houfe this lady had pitch'd upon 
bx this Interview^ was that of a Relation of hers^ whom 
ihe could truft) ?nd who k^^^^^w not this Gentleman. He 
came thitlier foon aft^er in 4 Hackn/sy-Coachu wrap'd up in 
a Scarlet Cloak that copceal'it bis Finery, and his Money 
tlmt he carry 'd in a Bag under lis Arm. Having difinifs'd 
the Coach whicji;! he had no fartW occaHon for^ he euter'd 
^he Houfe , ai>d was C9ndy<^d t6 the Lady's Chamber^ 
which he iou^d estnaocdiparily well fett^ut. The Lady was 
there all aloiie in a mia^nfficeui Di/^biiyey but masku As 
loon a^ ihe iaw |)im enter the K9bmy me tan to hun, and 
told hm wit^ a tender and engaging; Air, ihe had a Favour 
to beg ot him. above all Things^ which wa^, that he would 
bot oblige her tq pull off her Mask, iince. ihe fliould be 
piuch more free with hw in C9& h^ dad noL The Lover 
anlw^r'd, That would be d^fiving hu9l 9f more ^han haU' 

* his 

Ik Ik 

>ookin. of iGuzman d^Alfatache. 44.^ 

is PJeafurcj by miffing the Satis6<&ion cf feeing her diar-*' 
ling Face 5 but Cnce it was har Defiie itfliould be<fp, he 
ras contented.^ Their Converfation having becun here^ 
j-liat follow'd was ^imch more ravifliilig and deJfi,^htfolj| 
v^hich every Reader will be apt to giiefs at witliout inyfur- 
her Explanation. It is enough he j[ndws what pafs'd was 
^etvireen two Lovels, well intentian'd and aimable, whp 
lad: known one anomer a great while, and wete not come 
hither to pick Straws. Eer my part, I believe they pafs'd 
heir Time very agreeably, Tincc they fpent a good pait of 
he Night in that Recieanon. Story tells,. That both being 
Areary and quite tir'd out^ at length the Lady taking it 
ligh time to be gone, began tc ask the Gentleman if he 
.vas iatisfi'd widh^hbr^ and he hashing anfwerd with the pro* 
fcaindeft Humifity and Tranlbort, th^t no Creature upon the 
Bartli could be more happy than ihe l^d made hrm/ ilie d^ 
Sr'd he would :th^ give her the Letter again as he nad pro« 
mis'd. TheLwcr wirfiout any manner of Delay put 4Tts 
Hajid in hi§ Pocket, and ^ve itier, but it was tne falfe 
Oji£ vvtbich Jie had placid. there on imrpoie, having tJbe oth^ 
iafe at home. As Xbon as (he had got it, ihe only open'd it 
a* littte carelfsily, and beUeving it to "be the fame ihe had 
•writ, .put it into thejFlame of the Candle and burnt it. 
Tlien ilie thank'd her dear l^ver for his Complai^ilce and 
Es^iShiefs ; .andafbeiofsards, this being the laftSce^e ef tliis 
liappy Comedy y gave lum to undjer(knd it was time- to fe« 
parate. He would have fain h^d her unmask, but (he- 
found fo many Ejccufes to the contpary^ he thought beft to 
let her alone. .Then began new Proteflations ofLove and 
Kindnefe, Conltaacy and Fidelity ; but at length tlie Timo 
being come that th^. pauft part, theXara: was' obliged to go 
firft, however unwilling he fcem'd, that he might give op- 
portunity to tha^ Lady to go when ihe pleas'd. This jiditM 
ivas tender and. touching, and never Man underw-ent (b-fe- 
vcre a Trial. Hcdid not forget, as he went oqt, to pay his 
Acknowi^dgments to tlae Coxfidei^e ^Lod the Landlady ^H^- hk 
accuftoiia'd generous Manner. The Lady nofooner found her 
l^elf alone, but llie^nquir'd of rhcr Confidme far the Wbncy, 
and having feeii it in good Gold, locked it up in a Serutor^, 
in order to be carry 'd to the Marquis of iV-— thcncxt bay. 
Then leaving upon the Table a/very iii^ Ring for the Mi-*- 
i^efs s£ thdi-joiuey who deftfU no. better >ii&& mm-Detfi 


448 The Ufe and Anions Part L 

ihe went and took Coach at a Lady's, a Friend of hen, 
and io drove home exceedingly &tisry a that flic had got 
clear of an Aftatr which very much troubled her, and wluch 
was indeed die worft that had ever happened to her during 
her whole Life. 

The Morning following, our happy Lover, welL pleas'd 
he had at lengm come to enjoy the Blefling he had to long 
iigh*d for, put on a new Suit of Cloaths, and went to Majs 
to fee his Miftrefs, being more than ordinarily defirousto 
Ipiow whether he had pleas'd her or not. He entcr'd the 
Church with fudi an Equipage as made every body to Aarc 
at him, tho* that was but an ordinary Thing for him to do^ 
and approaching his Mifhrefs with that Reipe6t he i^ually 
paid her, tho with an Air of more Satis&dion than before, 
he ask'd her in her Ear, How (he had f^t the remainder of 
the Night. The Lady, who received him with a great deal 
of Coldnefs and Referve, aniwer'd, ihe fpent it as fhe us d 
to do I but could npt but wonder what made him to ask 
her fuch a Qpe(iion. He beginning to iinile, as verily 
thinlofig (he had rallied, repli'd, He thought he had good 
Reafbn for what be faid, fince he was fure ihe bad above 
half the Pleafure. At thb the Lady bluihing, cri'd, luxe 

J^ou Dream to talk to meafter this rate. The Lover, great* 
y furpris'd to hear her fay io. looked round about to lee if 
9ny body heard them, and iinding no body near enough, 
repli'd imiling as before. That indeed finc^ he had never 
had that Happinefs before , he might well have taJcen it for 
^ Dream, had it not been for fome fblid an^ real Circum^ 
(lances which convinced him to the contrary. I declare, cod- 
tinu d (he, with the fame haughty Air (he afTum'd at ix% 
I know not what you mean , nor can iinagine what (hould 
induce yi9u to aftront me after this |:ate. Hpw^ Ms^dam, re-^ 

{^li^d the Gentleman, who now began to he a little warm, 
s it becaufe you had a Mask upon your Face that you de« 
fiy wha( jpa&d between us lail Night? And what pis'd, 
p:i'4 (m briskly? Nothing, Madam, repli'd hf jeering, it 
you hav^ a mind to have it fi). B^t, continu 4 % I httle 
thought ypu would have made a Miflery of thpie happy 
Minutes that we fpent togctlicr. What happy Minute^ 
cri'cKhc in a great Paflion? Speak, explain your lelf. Ex- 
plain mv felf, quoth he ! Why Madam, and fo he went 

on^ and tpld the whole Story, which Ipeixig ;09 Jj^icms 

Book III. e/ Guzman d'AIfarachc. 44^ 

for xtie* to repeat, I hope the Reader will hold me citcus'd if 
I ctnit it. The Lady not being able to bear fo great frce- 
dorti taken with her, ftept up'clofc to him, and told him, . 
he was an impudent Fellow* to affront her after tlut rate, 
and at the fame time gave him fuch a Box o'th* Ear as w^as 
hcatd oyer half tlie Church. The Gentleman, *cis true, had 
hete an ciccafiou for all his Prudence to hinder him from 
ftriking a Woman, which he was about to do> and from 
behaving himfclf irreverently in a Place that tlicre couJd 
not be too much Refpeft paid to. He rccover'd then from 
his firft Tranfport, and being willing to ctfend neither good 
Manners nor his Confcicnce, contented himfelf with tel- 
ling her as loud as he could fpeak, that every body might 
h^r him. Ah ! Madam , then I find I have bought your 
Favours a little too dear,and for Confcience-fake you would 
give me tliis Box o'th' Ear back again. You thought. I 
luppofe, 30000 Frmcs was too much for one Night's Lodg- 
ing, and truly I now diink fo too ; but Tm iure I paid 
down lo much, and have a good BiHkt at home under your 
Hand to prove it ; for don't miftake yout fel^ Madam, you 
did not burn the Original, but the Copy only. The Lady 
beginning to repent of the ra(h Adtion (he had committed, 
firom exceeding ruddy that (he was before, turned all of 
a fudden as pale as Death, fearing (he fliould be tuin*d if he 
had really the BilUt he pretended to have, and having only 
Strength to creep out of the Church, (he took Coach ana 
faurry'd home as £ift as (he could. The Gentleman, about 
tvhom all his Friends were got, highly tefcnting the Ra(h* 
»cfs of the Lady, turn d the Matter to Kidicule as well as he 
could, for it was not an eafy inatten This Adventure foon 
made a great Noife, nqt only in the Church wher^e it had 
given great Offence, but throughout the whole City, where 
every body related it as they thought fit, but none forgot 
the Circimiftance of the 30000 Pr^n€s which they heard the 
Gentleman infinuate he had given the Lady for a Night's 
Lodging. As for the Gentleman, his Friends would needs 
wait upon him home, and he ftay'd thccti at Dinner, when 
they preis^d to know of him what had been the ocafion of 
all that^ Dilafter. He told thciti, his Defign Was to tell 
them ; for Cnce he had been fo abus*d by that Lady, who 
riot content to make a Cully of him, muft lifccwife aflfront 
faim in that infupportable niaxinetj he diougfac he was 
• * - Gg , xio 

45 o. The Life and ASiiom Part I 

3no longer^ obliged to keep her Secrets , though of never 
fo great Coticcrn to her. He up then and told them the 
vrhole Story, and ftiewing them the Letter^ fb|ne of the 
Company knew the Lady's Hand. By this means , the 
Thing became foon publick to the Lady s great Confufion^ 
who being got into the Country, forfook not only Play^ 
but durfT not appear in any Company for a long time 

I could tell thee, Reader, a great many other Stories re- 
lating to Play, if I had no omer Sub;e(^ to entertain thee 
with but tliat ; but as I have other ^Things to go upon, 
thou muft content tliy ftlf with this,which is fingular in its 
Kind, yet true to my Knowledge. To go on then, and con- 
clude this Chapter^ I muft ne^s fay, t tliink it would be 
for the Publick Good, fince the Villanies in Gaining are 
every where allowed, that every body ftiould be permitted 
them, and no body punifh'd for praftifing diem ; that there 
ihould be Academies eltablifti'd to learn them in, aijd Ma- 
fter-Rogues appointed to teach them, in like manner as 
there are Fencmg-Schools to teacli the Art of t)t(tnc% not 
to murder any body, but to defend one's felf as often as 
there ihould be occafion. The fame in refpeft to Play ; one 
itiay learn the Art of Gaming, and all the Tricks belonging 
tdit, the better to defend ones Eftate againft Sharpers J Set- 
ters, and fuch-like Vermin ; and tho' there are thole that 
would inake an ill ufe of this Liberty, yet there arc others 
to whom fuch Leflbns would be beneficial, and who woujd, 
perhaps, by that very Means be reclaimed from Play, tirhen 
ipb other £)o<ftrine would do, it. Then likewife Rogues 
would not have thofe Opportunities to cheat as they have 
lioiv, for then we might De able to contend with them up- 
^n tne Square, and dilpute all Advantages with them. Ga- 
ming was invented to unbend the Mind, and divert one in 
che'^ Troubles and Affli<5tionsj whenever it exceeds tliat 
Rule, it becomes a Paffion, a Vice, anInBimj'', and a Theft. 
It is now become a Trade, and there are a great many Pro- 
fc'fsU Gaineltcrs, who will pretend to be very honeft Peo- 
ple ; 'but if they are fuch as theyVould be thought to be, 
dicy need only confider the xnaay Difadvantages and Mls- 
fljrtuhes that attend it, t<5 enclinethem to quit it. Let theft 
noheft Gamrters tell ite. if they do not always ftek to play 
with fuch as arg wc^ki^ than themfdlves, ana then if thei; 
'// ^^ ''- - Aaioo 

Book ItL of Guzmati d^Alfarache. 4$ t 

A6tion be nek as bad as Thieving. Let them tell me, if 
they dd not take any Thing from one they ivin ofj where- 
^ in other Cafes they would be much mote fcFupulous« 
Let them tell me, I fey, if they have always kept to thtf 
fiune Stri^efs in Play, and whether, when they have loft^ 
they have play*d with the fame tntegrity as when they have 
tvon: if Gaming has not forcd mat from them, which 
they nave afterwards been obliged to blufli for 5 if in a 
Word, they have not a thoufand times fworn to forfakd 
Play^ whereas they have returtfd to it the next Minute. 
i^ut now many Qpeftions tould I ask you upon this occa- 
fion, who are, perhaps* a much greater Gamefter than my 
iclf, and underttand tnc Myftery much better. There attf 
a thoufand Confiderations to make a Man not only avoid 
Play, but the Places where it is pradHsU For tny t)art> a§ 
I have already own'd to you feveral times^ it was one bt th^ 
cfaiefeft of my Vices, and which I had greateft Reafon tQ 
afcribe my Ruin to. I had us'd it while I liv*d with my 
firft Xlafter^ and confequently could not avoid it with my 
fecond. Tis very difficult for one that is in Service, to ac- 
quit himfclf as he ought towards his Mafler, if he be ad- 
di6^ed to play, t hardly know one that would entertaiii 
fuch a Servantj for if he chances to lofe, the Maftet mutt 
be fare to pay for it one way or othct j and if he is not en- 
trufledwitn anything of value, as m my Cafe, then he 
will hot fail at leaft to be Wanting in his Duty every Mo-* 
sient) and mind every Thing more than his Matter's Bufi- 
nels. His Eminenee having been divers times informed of 
this, made ufe of all gentle Means to reclaim me, but td 
no jpurpole. One Day^ as he was talking to fomc of liii 
principal DomefUcks about me^ he declared what a Kind-* 
ncfs he had for me, and how glad he would be of an Oi^* 

}}ortunity to do me good 5 but, added he, fmcc I filid it i$ 
mpoioribk to reclaim him by other Means. 1*11 try whal 
diiinifling him will do ; but ftill I would have him eat! 
here, and be frequently told, That I would always be ready 
to receive him again whenever he fhould forlake his ilt 
Courfe of life, and return to his Duty. O fingular Vir- 
tue of a Prelate^ worthy of eternal Ptaift ! who deferv'4 
not only to be lerv'd and beloved as a Matter, but to b« 
honour a as a Father, fmce he treated his Servants mor# 
like hiB Children th»UQ Slmm^ It was not lo&g bef<M» I ga^ 

Gg a \m 

45 « The Lif^ and Anions Part I. 

his Emwewe an occafion to put this Refolutton of his in 
Execution ; for fomc ftw Days after I gave my felf fuch a 
Ioo(c at Gining , that 1 loft the very Cloaths off my Back^ 
and reducd my felf to an old tatter'd Waltcoat and 
Breeches, which they would not throw at, or it had gone 
too. This done, I made all the haftelcould home; but 
what to do, not to wait on his Eminence any more , but to 
avoid the fight both of hini)and the reft of Mankind,as much 
as 1 could. But I muft have Vi<ftuals; why thofe I had by 
means of a Brother-Page, who, tho he brought them, ne- 
ver faw me* When I had been miflfing for two Days, his 
Emhtence began to enquire after me, and no body daring to 
tell him why I kept up, becaufe he hated to have us accuie 
one another, he beean to grow importunate, and would 
needs know where I was, and what occafion d my keeping 
out of the way. Having underftood the Giufe, he was fo 
incensed at my irregular Condud, and want of Refpeft fat 
him, that he immediately ordered a new Suit to be given 
me, and fb bid them put me out of Doors, with this Cau- 
tion neverthelefs, That in cafe I Ihew'd me Icaft fign of 
Repentance, I ftiould be received a^in, and in the mean 
time be maintained with Meat and jDrink at his Expence. 
It was the Steward had tliis in Charge, who upon difmif- 
fing mej^ g^ve me all the AfTurances imaginable of his Emi- 
nence% Favour in cafe I would return to my Duty j but 
Proud, and like a Dog as I was, as if I had aeferv*d every 
thing, whereas I deferv'd nothing but this Fate which was 
juflly beftow'd on me, I went away gnunbling, and vow'd 
never to fet Foot more witlun thofe Doors. I kept to my 
Refolution, notwithftanding all they could fay to me, and 
diou^t I niflficiently reveng d my felf upon his Eminence by 
luinmg my Fortune. I became as great a Rogue as ever, 
and render d my felf highly unworthy of the Grace and 
Favour Heaven had beftow'd upon me by the means of this 
tious and Good Prelate, whoie Goodnefe towards me was 
inexpreflible. I became, however, at length truly fenfible 
of my paft Folly, and would have conformed when it was 
too late. I livd with that eood Cardinal with greater Eafe 
than I could have done with my own Father. He gave inc 
greater Liberty, and would often be pleas'd to hear me 
^alk* becaufe 1 had a fort of Wit that diverted him. I am 
confident evpu my Father cguld not h^ve indulgU me more 


Book III. 0/ Guzman d'AI^rachc. 453 

than he did^ nor would have tolerated hi xnc half the Im- 
pertinencies and Extravagancies. He never ihew'd hupfelf 
Mrcaty of doing Good, nor ever gave me the leaft angry 
Word, tho' I dcfcrvU fo^nany ftom him. In a Word, he- 
was Goodneft it ielf, and I altogether the contrary, .ip that 
'twas in a ms^net impoflible we ihould long agree togetberi 
and if^ we parted. 


C H A p. X- 

Guzman gtu into the SpanHh Amhajjadars Service^ 
and teUs you what Tricks ht flayd there y and.ahave ally 
one 'verj pleafant one that he fervd a Frenchman, and 
another that he flayd a Corcjouan, 

IFoUow'd rm Humour in every thing, and was ever 
ayerie to all good Advice, refolving mil to take my 
own Courfe ccMne what would of it, which was the rea- 
ion I always became my own Executioner, and in tin^ 
ruined my lelf e&Aually.' After I had thus Ibrfaken my 
good old Fatron the Cardinal, I went rambling about the 
Streets oiRome^ qotknowing whither I was going, or what 
Employment I were beft to engage in next S^eti^nes I 
cat at one Fnend's Houfe, for you muft know I bad got 
Friends by living with this great Man ; and foi^etimes at 
anothers,. who being not mucn better than mv fclf, would 
be fure always to eive mc bad Advice : .but feeing iqy Mo* 
ncy begin to fall ihort, they at Ungtli abandona ine^ for 
fear I might one Day become a Charge to them. I might, 
if I had lo pleas'd, gone every Day and vi<S^uar4 niy Camp 
at a much more honourable Flace, 1 mean my oki Mafters, 
wluthcr I was frequently invited ; but I was fo bcwitcfrd^ 
it could never enter into my Head to do my;fe|f fpmpch 
good, which in time I had reaibn to repent of heartily. 1 
chofe rather to fptmge upon thofe that wifh'd ^e hang d fpr 
tny Pains. Do not pretend to judge of the Sinfrerity of a 
Man's Invitation till you come to eat with him, for 'tis 
then he will fhcw you his true Countenance. People that 
invite you, do it for the mpft part out of Cprnpliment, and 
^ ^ ' Gg 3 therefor^ 

454 ^^^ ^(/^ ^^ Anions * Pirt L 

Ihcrcfore thofc that undcrftand the Woridi are Very rcfcr- 
▼ed upon that Head, and fuftcr themfelvcs to be umtc4 
twice before they come once, The Spsn^ Proverb lays* 
ToH mnfi mt ctmtimie long -0$ d Friend' £ TMe^ fir fearym bed 
the Qfair : /md another adds^ Vfitb a manauy a Week is 
4 great dexl { with n Brother, -a Aidtuh^ mtk 4 gmdlrietul, d 
Tear : tnt with yofir Father, tho' he be bad, yoM wdyJUy Ayutr 
fj^e lopig, for he wiB hardly grudge you your ViRudls. 

Hanng at iength obfenr^d y began to be tcoubkibme to 
my Friends, I thought of feeking out etfewhere for Sulte- 
pance. The Cardinal's Servants invited me no longer, 
they began to be weary of me, and bcfides he foon after 
fifU fick, and in a fhort time died, to my great Mbfortune, 
mv Folly depriving me of that Share in luis Favour whidf 
Ctners tecly for be left every cme of tl^em a good Legacy. 
Seeing my felf thus red^c'd to Araits, and knowing that 
the Spanijh Ambafladpr, who was one of my deceas a Ma- 
fter^s particular Friends, had a great kindnels for me^ the' 
h^ duf R 'n6t Aen take me for* tear x£ difobiigiikg hb Bta^ 
fience -, ^I vfttiX, now he was dead , ahd oflfer'l m^ /Service to 
htm, A«)d hetdseiv'd aie v^y^^racioudy. - As faecaipeo^ 
VS ftiy'XQi:<1^5, and cbniaquetitty I had many Of^ttuiiities 
i£ OSie^yi^^ hith what I ^i«af9:gbQd for, hc'taook a ^peat Fanv 
^Kon^jdkA thought; me {)roper tp d&TcIt imi. 1 Spmn has 
fiieen e^rffrpitfui in ^ood Genius s, and ^ood &ii&^ans 
io haVe '^b^n al1ott!ed It mtumlty, we SptmaMs poetendiog 
to bei^or^ jtidicious and ready witt^d ithan X)dier:NatiQttt 
dommorrfy are. Thii litinifter, who had; been ^hoftm £» 
mn Ehibajn^ ih a vefy ilkse Conjun6bire, acquitted jsiitafrlf 
perfe<$Iy fi^ell in k^ beifig a Man of {^Ttsj, Md qo body 'had 
that to fay againft him^ which mieht be faSkliagainft lieiany 
in the fame Empldymcnt i but yet he had caacF^e^ whi(^ 
fi^-tH Pei^s t<^mmonly hate, and al>ove'aU wcSpamtrds^ 
and 'thsti #as, that he was a i^ttle too miu:hfiddi(%d to the 
feir Seat, whf(^h took off friaji j^ie Eftccm he would dtbar- 
)^fie%^^ad in^^Ms^i and bade him to negtaSbthe moft 
importWt'Afl&irs df his WLinitfllry*' He few in sire a Wit 
Ppcy ^opcr ^o promote, his Amaum htxif^^ and that 
it. was lie it firtt defie^n'd me f<ir, Thi\ Ttis'ttrue, is none 
of the iTrfrtt hbnpurabie Emptoyments a Sepra:iit <pati have, 
but yet it is the mqft aivaittagioui and agwaibk, ituE&mcfa 
as it mali$5 pnej^fler gf ooes Lov^^ Secretin w^.. frpoircs 

K . ■' one 

Book III. 0/ Guzman d^AIfarachcJ . 455 

one the eafieft Acccfi to his Fayoi^ and gpod Will. Great 
Men mud: luve all forts of People about theoi ; yc^ to &y 
truth, I was not ovcr-prc^r For this Bufipefej bowcY^^ 
when a Man is once born a Rogue^he eaflly brings his Mind 
to all kinds of Roguery. He began to i»ake ufc of mc,. by 
lending me on lope petty Mcflages to fome Ladies, wherein 
I acouitted my lelf tolerably well ior a Beginner, and at 
length becainc £0 ddroU^ tliat he cong^ iv*d a more than oiv 
dinary Aflfeftion for me. In a word, I foon became Fac^ 
Totnm in this HoujTe, and all I did was perfeciily well lik'd. 
This made fom^ of my Fellovf-Scrvants envy me, ^^^9^^^ 
ally the Old Stagers, who woujd often call me'BuflNjon^ 
and fomctimes their Lord's Mercnrj*, but as I gave them 
tio g^eat Q(;c^fion of di0ike to we, . a^d did not pretend tp 
engrofs their Lords Favour to thei^: Prejudice, they Jiv!d m 
good Intelligence with me, and vwould fomedmes b^ 
Boons of nie. For they law \ was always ready to obfige 
every body. When they had any Trick to play any one} 
they would always come to me, for I was juftly reputed 
fot ftich-Iike Fancies while I livU with the Cardinal, aui 
they knew I did not want Wit. We employed onr ill Na- 
tive ipoft againftPwfites and Trencher-Flies^ never ajv 
peat before the Clotliis laid, and will ever be lindingFaulf 
with Ibme thii^g oy other, to fliew they ate Pcrlons of Di- 
ftindlion. THele Yerniin incommoded hi§ ExceJkncy moftj 
but we fciifld ]iVay5 to get rid of them, for we us'd - them 
very Icurvily.'. JM for fuch as were really invited,, and 
whom we knew pi^jb Loijd had any Refped For, wc would 
be fure to Terve tnpn with the gjreateft Exaftndfe . We aii 
ways W2uted -their Jv^otions,. aiui upon the leaft Sign were 
ready to bring thejn what they wanted. But £o»otbcx$ V 
ha^ been fpeaking pF, whowiere jaaany times Perftms in a^ 
njariner un^aowii, Kn^ght-Brrante, and fuch-liki Vagrant^^' 
who came impudently to occupy: hottA Mens Polls, we 
would not Fail to .oDlige our tofd Ambaflador, by let-' 
ting them wait Tor Crink ^ill^tjiey wj:re- ready, to* ourft' 
again. They might ^ake as :inany>Kgn8 as they" would, 
no body regarded tl)em, no body uoderttood- tbem. « If 
we let them have a little Drink fiwetimes when wc could^ 
hot ayoid it, it ih9iild be lure to^i^ Fq littlci, that it fliould; 
r^er Xerve to encrcafe thcjf ThiflV than queiicli ity <*• 
cjfe we gave it them without fee in SummcTj or in luch 

Cg 4 fcrt 

45^ The Life and Anions ^ Parti 

foon that they iliould not have time to tafte it, atid give 
them in the room of it fomething that was very fait to 
augment their Drought,or clfe what'^wasthc lead inviting at 
Table without their calling for it, by which means we 
fometimes drove away whole Shoals of them at a time. A- 
mong the reft, there was a Frenchman fo very impudent, that 
he pretended to be Coufm-German to my Lord Ambaffador, 
and who of conieodence muft be a Man of Quality,- but 

fou muft believe nim on his Word, for he had no other 
'roof to bring of it. He was of a very peculiar Character, 
he talk'd inceflantly, and in fuch a Tone, that he feem'd to 
demand Attention ; neverthelefs, what he faid was for the 
moft part very fiUy, and littlfe to the Puitjofe. His greateft 
Topick,and of vwhich he was always top-rail, was the Prailc 
of his own Nation. T6 hear him talkj you would' have 
thought there was no honcft People in any other Country, 
ror none pcrfeftly accomplifli'd but in that whetc'he liy a : 
That there was not cllcwhete to be found any Nobility 
well-bred, well educated, or that underftodd how to live. 
Then he brag'd of the Greatnefs of his Country-mens Soula^ 
their Fidelity towards theiif Kings, their Gerferofity towards 
Stranger?^ and their Difintcreftednels and Integrity Upon 
ail Occauons wbatlbcver. He faid, there were no Women 
more referv'd than his Country ladies, nor who made Pro- 
ftffion of a more auftcrc Virtue; that they diftinguift'd 
themfclv^s in Convcriation as much by their Wit as their 
Beauty ,• that the Ref ptft they drew from Mtn ' by 'thefe 
means, amounted very dften to a kind of Adoration ; thai 
they were towards Forcigh Ladies Curtefy and Civility it 
ftlt ; that, generally fpcaking, there was not a People of 
more iuft Dealing than were both the Men and Women; 
that tni& charm'd all Strangers ; that there was not a foberct 
Nation under the Copes of Heaven, nor one where the true 
Religion was better obfery'd, and Jufticc fpeedier admini- 
flred without the leaft Corruption. A thoufand other Par- 
ticulars he reckoned up, whidl I have cither forgot, or care 
not to tell you, for fear of fatiguing you^as mudi as he did 
my Lord, rrhm havinfj foHrtcrly been Ambaf&dor in France^ 
knew vrcll what Credit to give to thefe Stories. But being 


Book III. 0/ Guzman d'Ali^rache. 457 

It length quite tired witji) hearing Jb.-mucb on the £une 
Subject, he faid one Day tp me in Spm/h^ which this 
Frenchman did not underftand, Thip Coxcomb has wearied 
both my Eyes and my Ears. This ^a$ enoygh for me, and 
his ExceBeney did not fpeak to one that was deaf. The 
Company fitting down to Sypper, I made it my Bufinefs to 
wait upon our f r^^cA Adventuren who calling foTiWinc 
plentifully with a great deal of Aiiurance, after nis wonted 
niaiiner, I were fure to give him that which was ftrongeft, 
that he might come the bftener, which in truth he did, to 
Quench his Thirft. I likewile took care to help him to the 
ialtefi Bits and the largell GlafTes, which out of the accu-* 
fiom*4 Sobriety of his Country he generally coveted, and 
drank to the laft Drop. All this went well, and from his 
manner of Talking 'twas eafy to obierve tlie Wine began ta 
work. When I found him pretty- ilear gone, I took a; 
large iilk Twift I had prepar d for that purpofe, and co- 
ming behind him, tied his Leggs gently tp the Chair he fat 
upon. When Supper was ended, 9nd ; the Cloth about to ' 
be taken away, going to rile briskly .^fter hisaccuftom'd 
manner, he tumbled. Chair and all, along upon the Floor/ 
but with that Force tliat the Blood gu(h d out at his Nch 
ftrils and Mouth, and 'twas thought be had broken his 

Jaw-Bone and GriUle of his Nolc. This occafion d Ibch a 
aughtcr as you may imagine. I was one of the firft that 
went to help him up, and' untying the String nimbly, he 
never came to know what had been the occafion of Ins FalL 
But the Jeft was in our Grimaces while^ we were lifting 
him up, and the Zeal we every one of us fliew'd to affitt- 
him in tliis Exigency. One brought him Water to wafli 
his Mouth, anomer a Napkin to wipe away the Blood, a. 
diird was ready with a Brufii to clean his Cloaths ;. and, in 
a word, every one was fo forward to ferve him, as gave 
fufficient Diverfion to tlie Company. For. my Lord's Part/ 
he was ready to burft with Laughter 5 whilft, to lay truth, 
our poor Frenchman was ready to cry^, *He was^ indeed, in: 
a great Pet, but that was what we were glad of At length 
whisking out of the Room, without fo much as taking. the 
leaft notice of the Anabaflador,' he never returnd any more^ 
which I fuppofe his Excellency was not forry for. All our 
Tricks did not fucceed alike. We Jiad lomctimcs to do 
with Perlbns that would make a ]eft of. us, and turn all 

' our 

45 ? ^^ ^f^ ^^ Anions Part I 

Gmmoes upon lis; tiay, would not budge whatever 
«re laid or did. I remember one above the relt that was a 
GnbMM, and caifd kimielf an Officer. He was a cunning 
Baical, and carried his Impudence much hkher than any i 
erer knew befbre.Coming in one Day into the Ambafikdor's 
Houfe about Noon> when his ExceUeney was goins to Din^ 
aer, he <:ame up td him, and told him wim a bold Air, 
yet very civilly,that he was a Reform'd Officer, born in Or- 
doHM^ and a good Gentleman, but having met with Misfor- 
tunes, 1r was a little reduc'd, therefore oeg'd his ExceHencj 
would be pleased to let him taft^ of his Favour. The Am- 
bo&dor having heard his Harangue^ and well knowing 
wiftt it meant, pulfti a little Pur(c out of his Pocket, 
whore diere were about five or fis Piftoles, and.being mtu- 
lally generoujs, gave it the pretended Officer without open- 
ing it Having fo done, he thought to have ^ot rid of 
him, wherefore wifhing him all manner of Happinefs, and 
suloiig him a fraaU Inclination with his Head, he tum'd 
away to go and fit down at Table. But our Omcer would 
Qot quit liim fo, for reckoning upon a good Dinner, he 
waarefohr^dmotto let go the Occafion teat prcfcnted for 
getting one. He foUowd his ExctUcney, and coming up 
with, him, began to give him an Account of his Birth, Lift, 
foowefs, and what not, till fuch time as lie came to fit 
down at Table. He took Pkce among -the reft, and beco- 
ming at length very 4ry with continual talking, he bec- 
kon d to me to give him fome Wine, for *twas I whofc 
lot it was to wait on kim. Seeing I did ftot ftir for five 
or fix Signs he made , and not knbwirtg wlbether to afcribe 
it Do Ignorance or Imptidence, he t^riVd about faaffijyto 
my LooA Ambaflador, and fa«d with « grave Aif ^ I bppe, 
my Lord, you do not think I hav« taken too much Biberty 
isi placing my fetf fo freely at your ExcellentVi Tablcirndi- 
qvt Invitation. I am a.GentkmaU) my Lord, and, ^s fudi, 
believe my lelf not'^nworthy of any Honour or Civility 
may he done me by Potions of your ExcelleMys Birth and 
Chacafter. I am mcMreovcr. my Lord, proceeded he, a Sol- 
dier, wliich is a Qiality tnat would not dishonour even a 
^nor, tho'I ihonld dme with him. But above all tbis^ 
nay Lord, continued he, it is mcer Neceffity that puts me 
upon this Recourfe^or a Dinner, and mak^ me mnfgrds 
all fli^t Formalities, which at another ^me it may be I 


• »' V". •« ,' 



. ■. - > ♦.'>.?*.* I-' 

■ ■ r T 


't* '* 


' \' 

», * 


^ i 





■:,» * 

.. .• ^ 

if - 


3- .'j; • t- .. 

. *»«*-' 'ili -S 


cnif^t better obicnrc I tfaoii^bt your EfcttBencyt Table a 
proper Place to remedy thefe Inconvemehcies, and that an 
f nviutioti was not ncceftiry to iml(c a Man well received; 
In £ne, my Lord, added he, if it be the Guftom in your 
EATstlkncfs Houfe tn give one Drink to ones Mcat^ I beg 
your EscctlUncy would be pleaftil to order that I may faavo 
a Glaia of Wine upon calling for it. My Lord Ambaftdov 
XK>t bifeing able to torbeat laughing at diis fine Speech c^thii 
pretended OflScer, made Signs to'ite to gire him what he 
wanted. I obey'd^ and broueht lum Wine^ but that & lit*^ 
tic. and info io^ a Glaf3, that he mufi needs fee I gni^VJt 
it riim. I had no ibdner rebcivU the Glafi a^in^ and iet 
it on the Side-Boatxl, but I ^w two other Rllows entor^^ 
wbouiL I had fen twice or thrice before, but lifao novir 
connng too late found their Places takefi.: I beard them a« 
I paiad tfy mtittsr againft this iamc Officer, whom they 
lodk\l uppn with an Ait o£ Indignation and Contempt. I 
drew nearer thro' Curiofityy and asl^d them, if they knew 
that Gentleman tfaejr. look'd ib eamefily at Know hkn^ 
fays oiie, to t^c fure I do, if ycu caii him a Gentleman^ 
that is but the Son of a Cobkt^ who , livfes near the Oreat 
Qnirch at Qrdoua^ and who him&lf, while in his >owti 
CilTV Gould nev-er pretend to aiw higber Station thien xbic 
I tf a Tavern^Boy, tho' oaw I hear, forfootb, he i^s up 
ibr a Ee&rm'd Ofiioen If I catch him ont oW Doors, 
lays dbdher, VM tsachhim %vfaat it h to .take Gentlemen a 
(^bdes, that axe Men of Honovn:, amd Seryants to his Ma/o- 
ity and my Lord Amba&dor: which Shying, twiriijig 
9bout their WhiskeiB. and ihaking^ tfam Codk:'s Feaitherg^ 
yrhereof they had' eacm a Plume m their Caps, they tqiolc 
die Pains to retire. I law plainly tfaey were a couple of 
Bulliea, who had not much more Coura^ than ihe ^er. 
I let them go a little wiy, and then ran after them, and 
&id, Gentkmen, theOsnciemaaiivbom you have >j'uftn0W 
f^ grotly abufi'd, (ays, he knows you, and you only ace the 
Scomdrels you repceient bim to be ; , and that if you wilf 
be but pleas'd to wait for a Moment, fadll come and gtre 
you what yoin deferre for toextrng a Msm oof has Qpality af- 
ter diat'rate. With aii our Hearts ^ Lethiati come, kt IniKr 
come, cri'4 (they both together, we'll wait 6x lum till to 
mooiqfvJMbrning, hat well fee whaxhs ptytftm^y Ux Then 
\ ran tohiin that ioi at T^ble, and tsQld hinpi in hisiEar, 

4^0 ' The Life and Anions Parti 

but fo loud that every body mij^ht hear me. that there were 
two Gentlemen below, that delir'd to fpeai with him. Let I 
them flay: till I have din d, anfwer'd he very gravely. They - 
lay they cannot ftay, repn d I^ and that they muft needs 
ipeak lyitli you abo^t a Matter of Oxifejuence. But diey 
muft flay^epli'd he with the fame grave Air/or I fbah't fiire 
betray my want of Breeding fo mudi. as to leave my Loid 
Ambai&aor in th«- midft of his Dinner for them. Well, 
but they know you, added I, and fay you are but the Son 
of a Cobler, ^d that you never had any better Employ- 
ment than that of a Tarem-Boy. What, do they ulk lb 
irreverently of me, interrupted he, bluiTmg and riling up 
in a PaiTion? Yes, they do, repli'd L andboaftmorecnrer, 
tbey will not budge from the Spot where they are till diey 
have drubb'd you. well to boot .Oh! this is not to be 
born, cri'd he in a huge Fury ! if I bear this^ I may bear 
any thing; fo trying at his Sword once or twice^ to fee if 
it would move, and turning often about, as it he knar 
pot what he did, he baufd out mcefkntly^ Where aie they, 

Shere are they, let me come at them ! They are below in 
e Court, replied I, waiting for yooi; come, come, Sir, 
revenge your Honour, and tr^at them as they deferve. Then 
matdiing before him, he coiild not but follow me ; and my 
Lord Ambaflador and the Company/ almoft ready to burlt 

Eith Laughter, ran to the Windows that look a into the 
ourt, to fee what would be the Cdtdfirophe of diis Tnge* 
dy ; but they had not the Pleafure they expedbd, tfao' m 

Jtpparent Cowardice of thefe three Bravo's was not mudi 
e^ diverting. Coming down into the Court, I immedi- 
ately cry'd, See Gentlemen, here is this Son of a Cobler, 
this Tavern-Boy j confider what you have to fay to him. 
We know where we are , replied thty Trembling.and Pale, 
and owe too much Re(pe6^ to my Lord Adibailador and his 
Majefly, to meddle with him here: Another Time and Place 
wiU do as well. Seeing my Man did not anfWer a Word 
to all this. I tcliim'd the Difcourfe, and cri'd. Let not your 
being witnin his Excellency s Houfc prevent your doing the 
Gentlemati Juftice, he fliall go out it you plmk. Wim all 
our Hearts, anfwcr^d die/, but however we fliall meet 
with him fome time or other. Yes, yes. Gentlemen, re- 
plied our bold Officer^ you ihall meet with me, and fo 

iball I with you y. which Sayings be turn'd his Back and 

- .: . • - * tvcnt 


Book' III. 0/ Guzman cfAlfarachc. 4^1. 

went in again after a kind of triumphant Manner, as if hq 
had put fiis Enemies to flight. He retum'd into the Ha J I, 
where the Ambaflador and his Friends had taken theit 
Places again. They joy*d him upon his Efcape fo happily 
out of the Hands of two fuch rafli Bullies. He play d the 
modcft Part, and onlyfaid, he bclicv'd he had in his time 
had to do witli Pcrfons of as great Courage ; then finding, 
he began to hare occafion for more Wine,hc would not (fay 
till I ftnr'd him, which perhaps might be never, but rery. 
rcfolutely went to the Side-Board, and having fiU'd out a' 
large Glafs, fwallow'd it at three Gulps. Tnis done, he 
fet down again to Table, for you muft remember he had 
not din*d, and fell to as heartily as if he had hot eat a Bit^ 
without taking notice of any body. When the Fruit came, 
which he did not much care for, he darted up, and makina^ 
a low Bow to the Ambaf&dor, told him he mu^ fiive his 
Excellences Pages the trouble of giving him Wine, there-* 
fore iminediatcly went to the Side-JBoard again, and filling 
himfelf out a good confcicncious Ghfs, drank it off heartily • 
which done, he turn'd about and bow'd profoundly again, 
as it were to thank his Excellency , telling him he was now 
Roing to look out for his Men , and that he fhould hear of 
him again before the Day was over. So (aying, he rctir'd, 
leaving the Company as much aftonifh'd at his Impudence, 
as they were furpriz'd at his Patience with me , and whole 
Tricks he had found fb many ways to elude. 

My Lord AmbdTador was pleas d to own, he had not been 
fo well diverted for a long time ; and whilft the Company 
Was defcanting upon it^ a Neapolitan Gentleman chanc cl to 
enter the Room, who was an Acquaintance of my Lord s, 
and who told his Excellencjj there had happen d lately the 
fttangeft Adventure had been heard of tot a long while 
in Romey and which every bodv went to enquire inta My 
Wd having a great defire to Know what it was, prdcntly 
^rderd thetientlemanaChair, anddeiir'd him to tell die 
Story, which he did as follows: 

C H A F. 

4^2 The life £fuf AHiOHs Partt 


7h AMOUR of Comt PaM^o ani Eteonori 


T Am fenfibjci Sir. the Stctfy I am about to relate to your 
^ ExciUincj is tola fevcral ways in this City ; but as nci 
Body knows it better than iny fel^ I hope I may ' be be- 
lievU preferably to the reft. I was do& bye and Ear-Wit^ 
Heft ot great part of it, and what I did neither fte nc( 
hear, I tad from a Friend, who was pm in Prifon tbis 
Moroittg for the fame Bufmefs^ tho' he had no other Sbaie 
in il dun beiog left by the prmcipal A6ior to give him an 
Account how ihingj^ pafs d. I perceive^ my Lord, added 
be^ your Excell&My has Leilure, and therefore I isnaguie you 
wUl not be difpleas'd if I enter into fuch Particulars as I 
knew to be true^ and not tell the Story too concifely. The 
Ambaflador told him, he might relate it with wbsLt lati- 
tude hepleas'd« nay dolcend to the moft minute Circum- 
ihnces if he thought fit^ for that he had Leifure fuifkient 
to hearken to him. 

Then th^ Gentleman proceeded thus. I know not. my 
lord, pofitivelyi whether you know the Count Pdviim 
or not, yet can liardly think one fo confiderable bodi in 
Cfaurdi atid State can be wjbolly unknown to yott. The 
Amba&dor having laiisfied him he knew him ooly by 
Sight, the Gentteman went on^ and faid, your Excelferu)^ 
havii^ onlv iecn htm> is fufficient to inform you he is one 
of t^ fineft Gentlemen in all this Country. None exceed 
him either for Beauty or good Qualities} and he ^as, no 
doubty mtide on purpofe to charm at nrft Si^t. I il^^H 
oivt your Excdlewy tio long Character of him here, the 
Ssquel r)f.hb St^ry i^iU abundantly acquaint you of his 
Merit. He was born to bp the Ornament of tne World, 
and of Rome in particular ; and you'l foon hearj how con- 
cern d every Body was that he was out of it. I cannot 
omit telling you, by the by, he was a Cavalier of about 
27 or 28 Years of Age, and had iKiches fufficient to fupport 
att thdft g^od Q^liues he was Mafter of, there being no 
lord throughout tlie whole Ecdeiiaftieai Pominions that 

k>okIIL 0/ Cazman d^Alfairache^ 4^^ 

ad a better Eikte. Being fuch z&l hsivt told ytftty gn^' 
'efervedly efteem'd by both Sexes^ he became the Envy ^ 
very Body, and was thought the happieft of Men, \rhe|i- 
c being decreed be ihpuld undergo a like Fate with ctbar 
^eople, he all of a fudden cnanc'd to &I1 in iove' 
vitii one of the. fineft Ladies in tlie City of Rome. He 
>w'd this Adventure to a certain Holyday, wlioi he went to 
lear a Confort o^ Muiick at the Adinerva. where a Gentk* 
nan, a Friend of his, reflgnd a Place to mm that was oa 
I Bench which the ladies were oblig'd to pafs by. The 
Coiifort ended, tlie County who had not a inind to be tirod 
to pieces in the Crowd, refolv'd to flay behind and divert: 
himfelf with feeing tne Ladies pafs by, among whom he 
thought there mig|it be fome of his Acquaintance. He &w 
a great many, but none that lie fancied, fo that he was a^- 
bout to rife and be gone, when at length came one that 
had a much better Air than the refl, occailon d not by het 
Drefs, which was very magnificent, but by her flately. 
Gate, Mien and Modefty, which law charmed himmoffy 
and rais'd in him an Inclination to know who ihe wa& 
He thought at firft the Care fhe took to conceal her feif un- 
der her Veil, which was not cuftomary for Woipcn to dO' 
that were any thing handibme, was no great AiguiaCHt of 
her Beauty ; but he was quickly after uiadecciv'd, when 
b}^ chance a Woman liappentng to pafs rudely the contrary 
w^ay, tore off part of her Veil, wliich was towards^ the 
CoHf^y whereby he difcoverU the fineft Face he had eves 
feen. The Lady wa« a little out of Countenance, and en- 
deavouring to recover her Veil^ could not but caft her 
Eyes upon the Count, who, looking iipon hoc at the jEamer 
time, receiy'd his Amorous Wound, Sie went on^ aiid left: 
the Cavalier in a kind of Extafy, {landing as if lie had 
been Thunder-^ftruckj bi^t coming at length to hia&lC ho. 
%valk*d after her, yet fhe liad got fo much thefWt of* hisa, 
that before he could overuke her, fhe was is^ nuxU with ^ 
great number of Ladies that flood at the Doos, allwitb 
black Veils over their Faces, that it was next to impoffibkr 
for him to diflingui/h her. This troubled him eacce^ingjly^ 
but having employ'd his Eyes confiderably In the SeaiTch of 
htu he at length faw a Lady enter a Chaifi^ who 9$ w^ll 
by her Shape and Cloaths, as by her Waiting-Woman, hf ^ 
thouj^ muft be. the iame he had feen ^ m tjie Qwrc^. 
• • ^ ^^ He 


4^4 The Life and A^ibns Part L 

He talfd one of his Footmen, and bid bim follow that 
fiime ChMfty and tell him whither it went, and who was in 
it. Having given theic Orders, he went home very well 
pleased that he had at laft found her out, and that-fce could 
xlot efcape him as (he intended. As he went along he 
could not but contemplate this diarming Lady, who had 
made fuch an Impreflion upon him, ^t he cliought be 
could paint her naturally. He had never feenany Face 
with fo much Sweetnels in it, nor with fuch beautinil and 
regular Features. He had never be held a more lively or fairer 
Complexion, more piercing or tender Eyes, a bi^tter fliap'd 
Mouth, or, in a Word, any thing in to great Fcrfiwiiion, 
which lie fancied the wnole World could not equal, or at 
Icaft exceed. The more he contemplated this Objaft, the 
more he became paflionately in love. He was no fooncr 
got home, but he was impatient for the return of his Ser- 
vant. Every Moment ftem*d an Age till he came, and he 
enquir'd incef&ntly if he was not come, or if any Body 
had feen him. At length he return d; and inform'd his 
Mafler, the Lady he had feen was Wife to the Cblcxiel of 
the Pope's Guardk and that if he had any mind to know 
"tnore of her, he nad die faireft Ofjportunity in the World 
to fatisfy him, being acquainted with one of the Servants 
of the Houfe, who would tell him any thing. The Cowa 
was fo taken up with his Thoughts of tiiis Lady, that he 
did not think of giving any new Orders to his &rvant 
upon what he had proJBfer'd him. He had never leen diis 
Coloners Lady, but had heard much Talk of her Beauty. 
He had urideritood likewife flie was exceeding jMroud, and 
valued her felf much on her Virtue, or, at" leaft, would 
not have Love made to her, but according to the Rules in 
Romances^ which was, to admit of no I^avours but finall 
Ones, and whidi fervid rather to encreafc a Lovefs Thitft, 
than quench it. A Gentleman, a Friend of his, had liiffi- 
cicntly experienced tKs, and who, after foitte Months of 
afltduous Attendance on her, was fiin to retreat inglo^ 
lioufly. All thefe Reflexions did not neverdbeleft diicou^ 
lage our Lover, they rather animated him to the A&iilt. 
He knew there was no Woman infenfible, and tibat if the 
Lovar did not fucceed, it was more his Fault than Ms Mi- 
llrefs^s. He laid. Women had two FoihUs^ thatof^.tevinj? 
Itts Men, which they did foihethnes mdrc fedoy* and 
• ' mocc 

fiooklll of <luzrhan d^Ali^rache. 4^5 

ttiorc^iqjkntiyv ahd that of dcCrin^ t6 bcbciqr'd, ^U/mf 
ing to do fo, wKich was a fprt <f Vanity that hbhe of them 
Could exempt thottfclv^ ftorft, ittxd which ittfcnfiblydrcw 
them all in afifr bac aqbthefi Oui'CJitllant'wa^ tio Noviqe 
in thcfe Mifterie;^^ He liad kqoviii' Wdoich of all fpnL 
and lucceeded widi many of theit!^ nay hbfd. hk ^tb be 
Itfe fuccdifbl here. Whi^ft' he was cntcttainiti^ VuKTctf 
with all.^efe variotis an^ ambrom Thou^ts; the H&urarr^ 
riir*d ithat Lovers in this Country are wont to ttttlirthcir 
Paflions knovtifti 
He ftfolr 'd ttOt t6 

tend Urn in good order, he rdde to and fro in thatfSrttfeif 
Ivb^re his Footman had toid him his Miftitfs Ur'd. ThV 

indeed it im. HejiEulhcver^^renher jplamljr^'andit^ 
impbdiUe Ibr hiin to ^^^^ thro' the GMes; whedjier it 
Was the ^uoe Lady had fo chsiiin'd him in the Cfaiird^ ^iie^ 
.verthelefs lie had a mind to heliei'e it; and l^d ^thaj^inatioi^ 
teprefehted to him that it could bjC nbidthtr/ One things 
however tj^fttitb^d hiiiK IJrhich tb'as, that that Lady havinjg 
been matriM fi^e ^cr Ik Years, could not be Icfs tharj fcuf 
tt five and' twenty, whereas this that he 'hadfettiif} th^ 
.Church did not appear to him- to be above TcveiptcA dr 
eighteen, yet he knew there wc^ fonie Women that cacricd( 
their Years better that^ others j and moreover .his Heart 
bein^ not wil4j)Dg to'bis undcQdrd, he declined aU furthpf' 
-Scrutiny^ Tdtftit of ^lins; into fomc Pcrpiexity a thofifejod 
times more kitripte tfian Siis Error df Tiijs cctald be. ^ Sup- 
t)ofmg then it muft be his bdov*d Lady tNt he fawj hp 
Ixgan by fome Si^ns to mate a Declaration of his live, 
livmch is euftboQiary m this Cbunir/; but in return^ Ke had. 
no other i'i^^Wer than to ftc the Window let ^oy^p. * ,Thit 
did not at air ititi^zc him, for he Jiad thi Vaniry to c^n- 
^lude from Aenee that the Lady uhdefltood him, and ap' 
proV'd of w|»t !be 4ad'done» 5b much iii 'thtfiiijKt waj 
^ffiqqit Jof jc^c Day, that is, LoVinj^j and'^irhaiing his 
love-kJHowh fe ifce ,Krftv befbv*di He retiini'd <hc &itt 
JDay, and th^ Lady dealt oy Vm mtjch as fte had done . pve 
S>ay btfore^ but 14^ A* was 120 N9Vfec w thefft fort or 

^66 , : TbeJlJfe an4. A^f^ .: fan I 

^{iflcrieiy and had had &UixiC3 befoi|s ^ov, .ihe. nfily^ u;^ 
dafEood, ^^^^<^ ^^ lecond Viil^ tlm 4w[ va^ % Lover of a 
fiicw^Oiific^ jFct as ihc liad cieirfr Jbadiooc tut caoiie up to 
bixn in TOuit/.dTRcgatatiQn ti^ Quality, it l^ter'dher 
Vanity, , imit {he was s)9rad9clid& rdoiv'd to adhere ffaidly 
Co the IUiksaQdMaxui2s.lheJfiadfon3^ i€- 

fixiS; to bdtfxs, Fnde,, Bifdaif), ^Indll^np^. aiid even 
Cruelty^ mud be xoade ufeiof for, this purpc^;; and this 
Per^ML fori^thi mu{^ iu&r more th^'t} an;, of bis Pjede* 
ceiloss nad done. As for pur Cav^licr>/ wm^ba^i been ec* 
cui^coii'd to thcie forts of Pioccodi^apdcl^qi^ that tho£; 
that })tctAndeci to be inofl luughty, wese bou ad^i^^^ 
moil tnfeaiiblk, be. kept oHhi^ ^^> ^lti^ <^99tiixuf4'fo£ 
lome Days'lus prancing .abcNK'tha;t^Str€^ bdt^dry Dav 
with an l5:]uipa^e nictfe iiuffii^ficcnt .ihajj^ pfidtixuiry. He 
watched lus Miftrefs >whcB^ £be ame put io jodI to Church, 
and would be iure afways to follow j)a,;iy!hen he would 
taAguiih and. Ogle like a trije Lover« All tlungs of this 
Nature ioeak in this Cpumry^but luv^nga^aiindtoQc- 
plain. his Pa({f)n farther, he wr^te a Letterj^^hca^* and.made 
(is Servant, who was aireadg 'acqualqt(si ;U$he Faiaiiy, 
deliver it.. But this was-'gpmgalittl&'ioo^, theLm 
was.fent back/ and the S!ervanttmeatned, Jp;Caie«hf u 
todtj^fuch Meilages, to have liis Bones/brote^ ^Ajl-thisdid 
«ot dticourage our patTiouate Admirer, his.Xove> took but 
>tbe deeper Root for't, andlie ivoi^Jd 'need'& infertile of Pre-^ 
jfentSy wliich he Hnew to be \h^ Ihorted^way ta deal widi 
the ladies^ but lie did not i^cc^ed for alt that^ his Srefcnts 
wererefusd* and fentVack.jai likc.inanner wifh his Letters, 
'jphis vnc'd the Contu very mudV for now ^ .^^ plainly his 
Milbefs begftu to conceal, her Iclf ftop him^ andretir'd 
fironi the Window as fopais Hie obierv'd him coming into 
the Strcc^/ She Jikewiic .changjd her Cliur^ every Efey, 
sbd fb difgt^isd her, iel^; that ,lus Servants.di^.^^^ W^ 
^cr. and* confequently.<qiiild'Uot follow jie^ ai-formerly* 
All tluf flic^did ihe bettcjfitajjrqve his. l^jxiffTs^ 
and, out of a Vanity ihe Jh^q^' tO; diic^ipuiq^Lovors^ and 
ma]^ thei^ wait upon. Ixr as JsiiKl);as\/l|g' could. Our 
(W/bequae *^erV Cji^ mo^^^^ 
ijrays to caw y lus Pomt, ^^^^^^^^ 
culty indou^g^it. , He bx.chaqcc<Ji6f>d^x3*^^|t^ 
bec'ft formerly iaf iy^-^cQi^i^j^c^gija^ io^c>,;teM jus 


. 4 iviutrcls's 

Book IIL of <^\xxm d^Al&r^che. 4)^7 

^ JMi^y^A 4[l^Utioti/ iSov ' her Jdwf: ©Jfy*, - M^ ti^f)Ugbt flie 
SQuft h^s be feWiceabie to' hon.^ &x was^pp; a little 
upoB me I>SGa;y, but who liad ibcso form^iy a Lady in 
'Efleetti,' ^andvalttodibrber'Beaxityand ^oodAu&liri^- ^e 
refol^'d 10 rene^v his Acquaimarice ivithher, aiid for that 

Ekixptit gbin^ to wai^on^faen joadeh^. acquainted mt^ 
IB AaiDur. ' 7hc Lady, who ddir'd notbitig mqi^e tlian to 
'be fer^i^eabte to fo get^croids a Gentkmana&iie was^ and to 
i)fe cooeemd iijaJLovcJntriguc, whew the Intriguinjg Pcr- 
ibn has ev^ t6c greateft Share of the Pleaiiirej.did'n^t 
much (criipie engaging in his Intcreit, tho' at t|i ^xpcncc 
of ber Rdadons Honour. She promisU Woadjers,jiaiwl, be- 
ing i/<r4Mif»K to \Qk no -Time, imm^iiali^ly Avent to vifit^ier 
Cbufin. Ihe forthwith put h^ iipoafUd^ii^ of Lov^ 
^ovtx% t^ ordinary Conwiatioji between Woinenj ^ 
found no great Dimculty to lir^ thc/OM^/ir intp tl^e J^ij^ 
covLTk^hmOHndsy fo was tliip ^Ladies Name^ gave ik) 
^r to "What due ^id. This di^kaikg ^t Co^dtnte^ . 
ihfc began^ to reprdadi her Kiniwoooan wilh ilnleniibiUty, 
itelling her (he knew dbe ^hoie Bufine^, anddjat the Gen- 
' tlenmi had come hbnfelf to aoquaint her ;v^th it. ^hs, then, 
fet forth the MMt <of this JLover, his Du^^ his j^ood 
iiumour, his C^erdjQr. and^ in a Word, all .the refi of^bis 
'good Qualities,^ which ine did not fail toglreths b^ft Glois 
to; Celtnda perceiving her Coim M^eli inform'd 9f the i^iat-^ 
ter, and .finding ihe could no longer di%uiie het^Setui- 
mcnts, adaiowledged (he had betaif^ fome time courinc'd 
\of the G^if/af'slhciinatiotis, and a|^ced with h(r that he' was 
a very atmaUe Perfoti, but laid^ that finding ^o Eiuotiqa 
in her fctf towards him, ftic c^uld not think ihe jvas ciil- 
pable for not gloving him, aior j^iving. him aQ|r Tokens ^f 
4ier AflRwSion.' ' M^eover, Ihc laid ibe Jiv'd m a perfect 
'good Undferjftatiding with her .fcfaisbiind, who yjrz% very 
Icind to her ; and diercfore, if ihe might dcfirt tnj JFay^r 
from the Cbi^, it (hould be, that he w^ald dilhirbt% 
rjlepofe of ter .and her Family no further, but eixiployHu$ 
^CourtlWp elfcyvherc,' where nit might potebiy te wUijtSh 
./xiv^d, for as for he*:" jArt^ ffie ivas i«lolv*d to Jiparkcn bo 
no Addt^ df that Nature. ' HerCc^iTiAhayingrhcardh^ 
*jvitFi a great d«irjpf'Attejiu<ii, i^ould >ao^ for t]b p|«i^ik 
pufli the Matter any \&tth^, bjit contented hei'felf wi§h 
HDaring btfbke-i^i^^k^^ and re^ aaothj3£.£^eK»:typ 

4^S The Life ami ABkns Fan: L 

to dilconrfe more largely about it, to die end, ^t jgainkig 
Ground by little and mdc^ ihe might at Iqigth be capa- 
ble of mabng greacter .Efforts, ^e therefore took Icare of 
her; and the 'Cbifff^ like an impatient Xcnrer, coiniDg the 
fame Night t^ ktxm- the Sticras of faff .CowmfliaOy (he 

Eve him a better Account than the Thing would beafc^ that 
! might not defpair. telling him he need only oontimie 
his Amour to fiicceed in it. He made ufe of her to snake 
levcral agreteble Prefents to this coy Miftrcls of his, and 
ivhich (he could not re&le to accept from a RelaliQii. 
They wer^ generally Fruits and Flowers that be.fent her 
every Day, and luch as were always the beft in their Kind, 
-and the moft in Scifon. .&/iar/4. knew wdl lyj^aKealt 
'ihefe <3ivilities came, tho' her G^ufm pretended, .tq dhe 
' HbnoiiF -cif them ; but as they were only Fruit and Flowers, 
which (ht lc^*d very wciL flie. did not trouble her fclf 
mulch about them. 'Xhz Qinfiientt continued her Vtfits, 
.and made Iter daily* Prefents,. which were ibmetimcs accom* 
jpanted ^jividi- Things of greater Confequence, which had 
that Efte6^, thro' good Management, that £he was every Day 
* better and bett^ received. . The Mind of this coy La(w be- 
• gan to be n^ore and njiore: ibftped iu ttfy^ %o the uMr»r, 
who woiitd^ibt&iltopais'nowwand then by bis Mifttd^s 
' Door w4)i4e the two ladii^ were togctber. , S^ great Paiiia 
and Aflidnity^ being ^ not .liksly always to prove Fruitkfs, 
efpecially -with a Lady. vthat.\\si^ thoroughly convinced ihc 
^was ' belbv-d. they at lemth made ib confiderable a Breadi 
m'Cthndd^ Hearty that ineL wa^ prevailed upon to fee the 
<iiHnt once^ that if ihe cduld.npt approv]e the Addrefies of 
lb coin|3kata^iCatalier^ ihe inijdit at leaft rnake ufe of 
that Oppqrturxity to diiiiu^ chjsi Pret^tions* It Was with 
-no fiiiail ^4fficulty>tbat Gri/Wconfented to this Interview ; 
hi\t ds 'it jwas tO:.get Jid of ia tover (hat lb endanger d her 
^Rep6fe afld Biputation^ % ?* length gavjc way to it The 
ofil)' t^ifiiculty was to pit;^ upon a proper Place for this 
-Meeting, that might give no^joc^fipn of Jcalouly to Ixr 
Husbafha^ gor of Slandci tpa^y %9A^ elfe. The Place was 
foon feuhd^ if having already Wn agreed lipop between 
die Opifiipfue and tbc.Gtnm. The ConJMCfUe ^xopdid to her 
•tlien, tOHCome one Nidit and fup iu a Garden Ihe had in die 
-Neigbbouthood c{,i%my.. where her HusUnd had* ban 
mofo tlai}4)nce^.aad whece^: i?y ^eaQ$.oif,{i/Dai:l>Poor th^ 
"' ^i: *i .4 / '^ bpend 

Bcbklll. «/ Guzman d^Alfaraclife. 4^9 

^n IntcrviMr t^rlth the LmUy who h^ all minnetiof .Tdibcr'^ ? 
^y iti Atf Cardinars Hoiife, being. h& Relation.:: (i/iV4 
lik'd this Ropofalvery well, andthey both had no luteal 
difficulty tt) thake their Husbands cbnfcnt tolitv wiio t>frtn 
met and amus'd thtmfelves with' feme Game or lothfcr. . The - 
Countj who Was local advertifed of the ladies CoAfeitt; got ' 
hitnielf ready ijpbfa the Day of Rendezvous, • ^d did not • 
fail to be ^ere atiiie Hour appointed, whidi was fix at 
Night. ' The Ladies nvfoofeer law their Hurf)ands engaged 
at Flay, whidi was cuftomary with them to be, but tlicy - 
found MeansNiO Itoal away from' thclm to eo and priepate 
for their defign'd Walk. &lind4 acquainted ner Cbufm ihe 
imc^ded to ^o teil'd, ^s well for rDececcies^iake. as that 
the v^s TcibWcd "hot to cohvttle baie^c'd with the County 
and defir-d * h«i t<> 'do the like. H^r Coufin tdd her^ that . 
would bia llttietoo unkindl towards a Lovtf that had al- 
ways dl&Over'd^rcuiuch l^ndernefs and' PaflSon for lier, 
and' to whom (he hadci^er Aew'd fo littlc;Compliifance, 
She ait^RTCt'd^'Klie had not confthtQl to this Mtctitie out of 
any^ Deiign to: continue the Amour, biit rather to ^mk tt 
dSy and wotUd tm lian the tonat fibink ihe Jtnet jhim to- 
aUginent'hisTPaflton, but rather to »rcjcft attd atmul it. 
Hhe Gii^nifti^uld no( dispute with her anv farther upon 
this Head,: bains 'tfaoi;cughly pedfwaded that tneGw^ft wouM 
be able tofday ni^ Part wim h£r * when they Ihould meet. 
Moreororj Chc had obfetrU her Coufin had taken more 
P^ns th^t Dtiy todrefs her felf^ coittinuiiKabove an Hour 
at her Ola^^wJiich ihe ims^'d, with Kealbn enough, 
was not ^dragnU to be hid undes a Veil- The Ladies 
now fet foiftfi out of the Houfe without any Noife or 
Attendance: and having taken two or three Turns in the 
appointed Uarden, they enterd,into a thidc Arbour belong-* 
ing to the Cardinal, which led to a Pleafure-Houfc where 
Xhe Om^ was to meet them. As they were.walking aldig^ 
they enteftatn'd thendelves with talking of this Lover, 
when ail of a fudden Qlinda begau to feel fuch an Agita- 
tion of Heart, Jtliat ihe could not'fbrbear telling her Coufm 
of it j who^ : neverthelefs, had alreadv obierv'd it by her 
ftltenng in her Speech when ihe fppKe to her. This made 
them boch^gk They entered into die firiiKoom, where 
they fat;; ^anfelvosdownon a.CamomiI*BMn]^. which Ce* 

H b 3 linds 

476 ihe Ufiind ABioki I'tattl 

iMa bttf morir "dan otiiAuj <taa(i<^ iinr^ Vt^.^Uixdly. 
able to iland. They began to fte. d)e Lov^ wwld iffiakc. 
them wait fbrhini^ faot hcvasalx^y^ i9rC4l{lid|crRoom^ 
aDd no'^bdner Ikw thitci etna but be came tofiyvn)^ ivtth 
a Heart' mnctrhcaTia tfaafL'CriiWjts, becaufe JQ# 99^aa nore. 
in lore Ifhra^lben peicciT*d nttn ctmth^p V^hm t^e f^if . 
^*rfttcft^tI>ilordtr bcfc;a<i w rcteevir. He ww Jfeiv?eU drcfs'd; 
th^t Tidthvn^ couidr Ue erer like < him. lie b^ia/mtha 
f(«ble aiid unaftn^d Accents liiob a featfuir Init pa^ocate 
I^vef, tD pay Ids Refpoiis ta hi^ ^tfisefe ij^hi bating ha4 
time tdrdcdverker ieif!.imder her Veil, ^Jbidi^l^as ^crsa^ 
AdraDtage to ber^ ihe> hoarlccD'd.wHhi^ {9^ de^l oE I^Ji&r 
iufc to atl he iaid to^im ; tot^' "iiritboiif Id^iuig^^ Am 
f'Aier to ^hat ttbtcd;to bb Jtovir. ^e^toIdiii9% me did 
not k"no«f 4fhctbcr Ac oti^rtatoink facKjMlfobkg'd to 
iiim for the Paflioil' hi CB^f efs4 fbr ber^ Utt flMe i};^ mras^ 
line had done btm too i^reat a V^YdatMp&n^ ftmHiui Ac* > 
quaintance as^wds between: jJbRtfi^ |^t cdiifidmpf^ l^ Ne^. 
ceffitv flie was^pndec 10 di^ade:hjn fiK>m.his j&eten^ 
i^ fhougfat d^yrzk wxiiobbmcBMo &c:;a{forditag.tillit Ice 
tervtew^ Thtr ihe Inie^r ^aerT^di.-aaja^.Wonajbt'm l«fw 
vrhatWiisrrdtietD hibMerift^^ ^d^ihomr grext E&»i he w» 
in* but^lie^ltkewilc knmv) rind tbaft imich'Abettfcr,. wha^ 
Confideralmcli \ikt o^'d bar ietffaiid: Ittr. utiuabalidy wfaa 
lov'd iKt teiulmfiy, aiid.Mrttb:H;ltoni {hebad:;«^t^ deal ot 
Reafch tobeVell iktisficd:: 'TnaT'tii regstfdilie Am^rdblir'd 
to be ifviming. neither tb' oatf ilpf t^^cdiiel^ ifhe beli^ 
dealt tendlTf by biin inffldvifing him to cc^cj jife rPjori^tt^ 
trhich ti'Oirid be of no.Swrkt.i6km)^\\^u^b^ 
the Loi$> of* her! ReptitadiMy wA tiit Difttobebice .of her 
Family, iVhich was what iheinbtt fca'r'd r^Biatibc diou^ 
him to0 mucli a M&n o£>Honoiil'v and^n.h<)m^:Mlili ; and 
befidds^ believ'd he had .a ^Eoksr KefpoSkv^tba Ladies^ 
than to prejudice ohe whom he had pio&ftU'^ an 
Hileem for : And moreover^ after ihe had < free asi 
to diicover her Apprdsenikitis and UneaHiiefi.Qft bisAc-^ 
county flric hop'd he won Id confMcr her at lealfc and focem 
his Pretentions whatever Trouble it migirt; ooft :hiht -Tte' 
(iunt fttch'd a deep Sigh;: and. aftcir having ?reoaver*4bi8 
Sffiritfealittle^ aniWer^rf with all theTendtnid^axidSatll^ 
tniffion ,» ttUc. Lover waK capaiDle ofl ^ Air lenfeti^ srfimt a 
very n^^ni^ "pialogdetoftwoiIdo^iftCoiitiimaflir^ Yrbkh 

:. : : tho 

BookllL (SjF iSiezmafi 4;Alf2rache. 471 

his Mi^eftr^to ptemk hoo'totohirand fiiv« bdr^ ifao' if 

it-in her P^wer ^t)pr htridcr ittna^ wists ^in- to coofent to it | 
but (he fievpfti9idif& ' tecpjitVL^cn; him* that he woirid do H 
i^itbout Skew, wd' Vtfitb ^he tnoft DifcmioQ. bl couk^ 
and morecfv^ bcg'd of htin^ : tlnlt he *wo&ld /tiidt tnii 
ic 6:eqpet)tly tbra. lier Stree^ cmifing xather tirgive httfl 
l^ye- to \iEfit(t:f)9 her fomctiztm, stsinsKedtieftwafi, pr6f 
Vidinj; hts^Ltttei^ omtain'd ndtmiijg bat what was ft^^ 
and dnl^*^iRl\lhat ht ^ine them dpcnU toh«er'Ootiririi 
that ihe nu|^ reafA thearbfcfoce die igpe thesn toiiei. H^ 

t)ay, efpediiiy ttom (hcfa a ladfatt this,\vas;'coQtd batdiy 
find WoidU to expreis hi? Acknowledgment $ ai^dMatter§ 
bei^g tliQS' regulated, Qlinda hcf^ to talc of tetiting: 
The C^nti ktm^ her about tt> be gone, altogether tranfpor^ 
ted with. F^k»i; fell ontliis Kneeij and b^'d'of her td 
fhy £qam ftnlMoments longer, and that, .teme (he retired; 
(he would' at'ieaft be. fo good^as to kt him feehtr Facc£* 
This Rcqucftixi]^ likewife idebhded by the dnfidenu/^limid^ 
after having &ifbfd her felf ta be eonrtcd a toBg tittiei 
and leave the G^m^it the Moment after he had 
leen her, ihe held her Veil fo iUghcly, that her Coufin had 
Opportunity to^ lift it up^ whereby me difcover'd the fineft 
^e that ever had been leen, and which, beineafltfted by; a 
final! Bluihy becain? yet more dnrmi^* The Lover liill 
xexnaining ixpon his Knees, appeared to confounded and 
aflotiiih'd at this Sight, that be wasa long while witluDut 
^)eaking, which CtUmla perceiving; ihe pmentty imagined 
it was her Beauty had made him fo filent ; wherefere, thro' 
a gaiety of Temper that proceeded from the Pkafure (he 
jconceiird on this Occafion, ihe began to utter a thouiand 
witty and agtceablc Things, ^e moft clwmtng in the 
Worlds All tlm while the GMi;»r faid ndthing,; ieeming to 
niufe u^a Ibm^bat that aflfeded him exceedingly. '- The 
lady went ^n and addre&'d her felf to her Couun, who, 
^ving likewflfe a great deal of Wit, anfwet'd for the poot 
afimrimd lont*^ This gave time to the CMot to come k 
little to lismfdf, who ftarting up) like one that had been 
awak'd out of a pleafing iDrea^ began to make his iftmod 
f!(fqn 10 Anolo^aing; lor th^ fmal t Attention he had giveft 

H b 4 $0 

16 iirhitditladT was pleased tnfiy^ iiid^ dlb(tti» ^ ^<^^ 
free Air^Q bemd hicfaertodMe; fhc^i ^hLttut c^ul4 
poth do and (kj t^btnt he was Mailer of himietf. In the 
mean timc^ CnbuUj who (teenninVl to4)e ]^nc as fcoa a» 
th<; CwfH bad feen (tfr, was now. aItQ«;edier of another 
Mindi bmng^tlie iirfl tint mmiion'd fittifig, without being 
f ntfeiied, :^hcn tfaejConver(ati€li began to run lb high up- 
OQ pkafant: Matters; ibait Ixwe Ivas loon forced to give 

0la(|e to Mirth. Tne Comt^ whofe langmCbii^ Eyes had 
|)een jsrtatjy.eoltven*d^..the Sight of dna hit lady, be^ 
cime (]toitc aoothte Man^-rawl Supported the Converiatfon 
jpiqre ItlK a Gallant than. &• Lover. Btit:the Time of 

of retiring, but hei^ iSoufut ftay'd her, wdt knowing 
iy)thinj; . required her toiije gone. As &r ^ Cb*«y 
whp trpm. time to. tino« ictiun^d to bis Love-Hts, he did 
XK>t here all. the P^ititff a tedder and sy&fHcnate Lo« 
yrei:; for. whether it were that his Mind wa8xx)ntiniia)ly 
taken tip with Tio9gbt9^ or that hev^had » taind to 
Ktire 'htntftU, he. dictnot: in, the le^ft ibtw any further 
WilUognels. td haveUi|!L Miftrds ftay. CdbaU.:^&rv*A 
It with iome $Jtirpri|p,w(i eVea Goncem,' infomuch duo 

Jhe i0O0 aftf r riie^ttf'begooeinqirncft, andhewitfa-* 
cut ^ny tOtnoire dm the like. Jhc:Gt^eMt:o\^i(a»im 
foinifmblc a ConduS, and which favourd noihing of 
tiie Pafli^Yi he pretended, tdcdc the Libertv to remember, oim 
of it4 • lit: tl^^n hli again into nis Fsiflionate Ain^ 
but to jittle purpoit, h^y'ws^ to do .with £o ingenuous a 
Lady a^ Celi/id4 waf^ who being thoroughiijr angry, did not 
ffay for.her Goufin^ but contenting her lel£ with telling 
ner tpvex, ilie knew very well (he had done more than Ihe 
ought to 4cs but if he >vas any Ways plrasU with iL he 
owU^e OUligatipn to her Cotji^in) Ine retirii. . tfcr Cou- 
fip-ii¥^ediate]y foUow'd ; ^nd they were hardly got to the 
uardien Back Door betcre Cdt^n could not help looking 
about to lee if hqr LovetfoUowd her, or. at Is^ Igokd 
after, her ;. but ihf cpuld not diicover tbeieaft bUnkof 
him, Vrhich rendered her yet more inceps'd . 4tan flie was 
pcfore^ tho^ Hie ih^y^d npthing to lier Cbu&i ^tiut. the iit- 
mofl jlpdi|:erencc The Connt wa^ hkewift. no Jeis cimn 
cern a,at his being t})e Bubble bodi- ot Love and Fortune; 
&r jt was no^ the Lady s Beanty he ipokU aft^ wdwag 

:0bbk in. 6f (Sfuzrtiaft cTAlfaraicdc, 4i$ 

ih paflionatcly cnimottr'it oC C^^w/i was in tmth a fofc' 
Woman, flie had eftcc^inj^ regular Features; an excell^' 
Slmpe, a good Air^ arii lucb othtar Agrccmcm^ both-ofi 
Body aind Mind that are not commbn ; out it waj hotdir 
IVvccmels of her Cotintenancey her lanj^mfhirig Byes',' i*^ 
Ccttiplcirion fo equally made up of Ltlltes and Riofcs. a? 
ymiibful Air, and abcyc alj^ f ftcret €Harm; in which*is- 
Eyes iasr well as H^art could be decefivU- nc was ra<her^ 
ready to run itwd that he had fe foAfdJiWiy his Tim^. ^iid * 

Sent Two Monihs in purluit-of a Wofnan'^ttet he hew' 
oujrht ddirv^d fo fittle of Mm. HeUid-all theqaiife*' 
Qf hifr Misfortune iip&i her. and jtidj^d^ her altegetKef dn-^ ^ 
worthy <f the Piains he had taken. Ti?' if word, he Ithw' 
began to hate her itiofe than bfttpre he Ipd lov'4 ^'^9 ^"d" 
thcmght he could nor do her greater Jufttce'than entirely ta: 
forget her. But whUlt he was thus difinj^^ing hiinfttt fti ' * 
cnc fide, his Heart bejjan tcT cnflam**i6rc and ihorcioiiJte' 
othcr^ which ne%*>crtbclefi might hire been fu^p6rttoh|?. 
bad he known whctc to find lucbario^he^ Beauty as tljis ' 
was, for her he wa$ tcfolv^d to hare'rio more to a6 with!? 
This Thought altogether difmounted him, ahd loaikKita^ 
to wiih heartily he had never fccH'^ Getimla^ but alw|n^ 
lov'd her without having the fi^ht of hefc But mis! 
Thought was foon forc'd to give ^ay (d a thdufind otl^ 
more tormenting,- and more conforuiabl^ to his Paffibtt.! 
>Je plainly law he could not live without her, but mufr 
mSkk her, or die with Grief. His Malldy ehcteas'd tterf^ 
Pay, thro' the Dilficultie$ he xqet with in Winging l^sl^ipdi^: 
about. He was no longer Count P^ltrianoi nor wpiehted 
thofe Places or Companies whete he was us*d to come. 
He avoided even hisi^iends, tliat he might the better enjiof - 
ni9 melaxKhoIy Humour. Hefpent his Life altogether in. 
Hunting, which he would employ him(^f in from Morn- 
ing 'uU Night, and never return home but when it was 
datk^ and when he fliould be fure to ict t^oBody^ Thi< 
fumifii'd Diftoutie for the whole Qty, ivho could not 
imagine what Cattle to attribute this Alteration ta £>^ 
linddy whO| notwithfiarkling her haughty Caxriage, now 
l^egaxi t0 be more concerned at what related tb the Cotint 
timi (he defir'd^ being one of the firft that wss informed 
of the Change in his tourfe of Life, became ^reatfy afto- 
nilhUat it|^ as ^s likewiie her C^fih^ JiiwmiidSi that^ 


i|H, I - ^M l^ ^»^ A^¥m Part I 

&Ubm diicoDtsU : of any iUdk ^ But 
.^ jis a^ui[uf/4 nuift sfras^ that a(tf^/fo: ftiany Pro&flions 
oC^Xoirc add SiDcaitv, he (kio/iM. a|l of a iudoen ceale lus < 
T;;ffiljports, grow. tndii&tent| an4 n^t fiiajcc uie in. the Jeaft 
6r that Liberty )dbc £p(v« him of waiting to bqr. ^)e hod 
bbfcTF^d a Uule )x(crf iV ^ Gurnet th^. his P^flton did upc 
^ciKtfo lively c^r^animatfid^int^beginnin^ of.thisJiv- 
tei^iew $ brxt (be'c^ujd jyof^ tor h^ tiit^. iwasine bew^ be- 
ing .ia tranfportei^ he Was at ii» 6fll fi^t of . her only 
in the. Chuidh^ hc^bfuld take fudi a £^i>l^ to bet upoa 
ieeit^ her apin^. eTpMiallT Uf&^t her . CoofiD had: fi^ : wm* 
toIdhiA (he f)eva Ipi^w ner tncHcc Beavtifis). Moreover^ 
ihcJccckonU Su hi^d fila/d hf r Pfl^n ifi the late Convcria- 
tiioo, and that cvoAhc^aa me ^iQ(ntkin?n as hx^y^ib^ 
Aj^ 4n the I<aft had; .aiy: A4faH|^ ^<i^ Mr i« S^&ouric. 
I^ruthy/ihis Carmge of his.p[cftd<9JLber.Iinag}mumi 
u4aJLtho ihe would fiot let her. CWin ^ 

_. .^ if rooble ihf wm ui^cTj.beq^ftft of her haumtty.^* 
tfifiaiiour, yet fiif woAild willinglyhfYe beni iatisMd what 
''^xfai^'&mi^^ Her 

JigJsxKVir not what to think any..rno£e. ttmti (he ; bu( 
scpas altogether on the fide «oC Plrafiire^ihe told G?- 
,^^f, Clicej[}ui had. made ncifnore^^^ brcamo. 

.J3r^;ll)e would do well to wait «iU his I^ind £b^ubi be. 
clmi^di and he come and pay his t>evoirs.:a5 fortncriy,. 
ISiis^Aayjce would have been rcUihd weUeocHiglt by od^ 
^^^boie Heart was* at Eafe^i ^rid who liad not felt a Plcafim 
axid Vaoityin believing ner felf beldyd by fiKh a. Man as] 
t^e Cbunt was ; but .^at of Celin44 was in another Gon- 
(fitiox^ ^thadtnad^ a greater Progre^ than.^he C^piente 
thought for, and the Impe^uofity of her Huniour^ 95 well 
a$ t^e Sentiments of her Mind, did not much incline to 
Ii^bderation 9 L^ut^^bad nevertbel^is Difcretion fnfllicieQt 
to di&ihble. her rrailtie^ for foine ,time: However, at* 
length heacui^ iao Mews of . her Lov^r^ ikting him no 
where^ and not baying fo niucb aa si Vifit frooi the On- 
fdente^ her Relation, ine could hold no longer^ but maSt 
iieeds go and nhload ha Breall with her &id Kinlwoman, 
ibe being the^lV Perfon £be ar^. hrjr Mind ta 
and \vno.w'as,j^eftableto comfo]^ her. .This nftvertfaefcls 
iTie did not. do witliont abundance . of Tears that &A£iem 
her u^usvaj^^^jut.^bicii (l»:wiyBj«l believe. wocinQt.on 
. . ' the 

GimnaB dmracte 4^,.: 

jibe Account of hc5 lo^cr,' b^ir &f / W ;to 'fte h«r. -lift ^ 
}nfident9^^ who av:#r a^d above (be Obti^t^m £b»k9ii'M.''C 

MfHch fh9 had firft fits ^vk foot^ fi^'d* ^ 

.. jp fht bid always had foi bee S^c: (old hfif, /j^e fitiMf"" 

tiot vreU' ^ive into rhe Caule. oftyi ^ i^d^i Ci)^i^^iir>/ 

t):i9 Cip«;f/ ^ but if ibe were to gyoi^ ae:i^ 4^ moul^^k0>t 

apt to attribute it to the man^ CQyiKfi<|^..apHd Uaof^tiitf^'t 

(he ]^ad ihew'd to that Gem leimn.^wbaw^ /lot acfcufti^^^ 

to fuch Ec^ul-fes^ aod -who, kine iiMt^'dnifli.l: 

the leid GUnipi<^ of Hopc^ ^^uld npt ^iJUto^ntuspn tofaet-? 

as taMi and amorous as erer^ it be|ng oaiie to pe»:eiTi:^.{ 

by tne Life he led, tte^t his* In€on^n<^,< Prvp not owm^rt^n 

any odber Womans Chants, bat to^dovfj^gHt Otipiit otri 

^i^puiic .<A* ferik G/i«if figtfd, ^p^ fl^ yety gl«d^tt<jo 

hear her Coufm talk afm that rate, fytH^^UId'ctf J 

the iaxae Opidion, havijrij^ a quite c^t^^jh^ • N^Ho^rrof tfaoiS; 

Lover* l:^wever, Ai? faid wt|iiBg*HMt9>