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Full text of "The Mikado : libretto of the Japanese comic opera in two acts"

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AIDA Giuseppe Veidi 1.50 

In four acts. Italian text 

BOHEMIAN GIRL Michael W. Balfe \.SO 

In three acts 

CARMEN Georges Bizet 2.00 

In four acts. French text 

CAVALLERIA RUSTICANA ..Pietro Mascagni 1.50 
In one act. Italian text 

FAUST Charles Gounod 1.50 

In five acts. French text 

LAKME ;. Leo Delibes 2.00 

In three acts 

MARITANA William Vincent Wallace 2.00 

In three acts 

MIGNON Ambroise Thomas 2.00 

In three acts. Italian text 


In three acts Camille Saint-Saens 2.00 

TROVATORE, IL Giuseppe Verdi 1.00 

In four acts. Italian text 


In three acts Robert Planquette 1.50 


VIRTUE Edward Solomon 1.00 

In two acts 


PALERMO Franz von Suppe 2.00 

In three acts 


In two acts Julius Eichberg 1.50 

FATINITZA Franz von Suppe 2.00 

In three acts. German and Italian text 

LITTLE DUKE, THE Charles Lecocq 1.00 

In three acts 

MARTHA Friedrich von Flotow 1.50 

In four acts. German and Italian text 

MASCOT, THE Edmond Audran 1.00 

In three acts 

MUSKETEERS, THE Louis Varney 1.00 

In two acts 

OLIVETTE Edmond Audran 1.00 

In three acts 


LOVED A SAILOR Sir Arthur Sullivan 1.00 

In two acts 

SORCERER, THE Sir Arthur Sullivap 1.00 

In two acts 

STRADELLA ... ....Friedrich von Flotow 1.00 

In three acts 
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jjnmaiis ttiruna. 


( J3 Son, disguised at a VMM- ) 

NAion-Poo < faring minstrel, and faf 

( love wftA YUM- YUM ) 

Ko-Ko (Lord flij^A Executioner of TYttjw) 

POOH-BAH (Lord High Everything Else} , 

PI8H-TU0H (A Noble Lord) 

YUM- YUM \ t 

Prrn-SiNo... > T * &*&** Wardt 1 

I of Ko-Ko ) 
Pmmr-Bo J ( 

An elderly lady, in love teitA ) 
( NAma-Poo ' ' 


ACT I. Coortyard of Ko-Ko' offleUl 
Aor n 





Sane*. Courtyard of Ro-Ko's Palace in Titipv, Japan** 
tMntrtd standing mud fitting in attitude* luggated by native* 1 rmvrinf* 


If 700 want to know who we are, 

We are gentlemen of Japan : 
On many a vase and jar, 

On many a screen and fan, 
We figure in lively paint : 
Oar attitude 's qneer and quaint 
Ton're wrong If you think It ain't. 

If you think we are worked by strings, 

Like a Japanese marionette, 
Ton don't understand these things : 

It is simply court etiquette. 
Perhaps yon suppose this throng 
Can't keep it up all day long ? 
If that's your idea, you 're wrong. 

fnter NANKI-POO in great excitement. He carries a n+ti+i pirttar <> 
fcoefc, and a bundle of ballads in hit \**d. 

Bncrr. N'ANKI-POO 

Gentlemen, I pray you tell me, 
Where a lovely maiden dwelleth, 
Named Yum- Yum, the ward of Ko-Kof 
In pity speak oh speak, I pray you ! 

A Noau. Why, who are yon who ask this qnestloa ' 
Cosne, gather round me, and I '11 tell roo. 


A wandering minstrel I 
A thing of shreds and patches ; 
Of ballads, songs, and natch**. 

And dreamy lullaby ! 

My catalogue is long, 

Through every passion ranging. , 

And to your humors changing 
I tone my supple song ! 

AM you in sentimental mood t 
I '11 sigh with you, 

Oh, willow, willow 1 
On maiden 's coldness do you brood? 
I '11 do so, too 

Oh, willow, willow I 
I '11 charm your willing ears 
With songs of lover's fears, 
While sympathetic tears 
My cheeKS bedew 
Oh, willow, willow I 

tat if patriotic sentiment i* wanted, 

I've patriotic ballads cut and dried; 
For where'er our country's banner may be plaato 

All other local banners are defied I 
Our warriors, in serried ranks assembled, 

Never quail or they conceal it if they do 
And I should n't be surprised if nations trembled 

Before the mighty troops of Titipu. 

And if you call for a song of the sea, 

We '11 heave the capstan round, 
With a yeo heave ho, for the wind is free, 
Her anchor's a-trip and her helm's a-lee, 

Hurrah for the homeward bound I 
Yeo-ho heave ho 

Hurrah for the homeward bound ! 
To lay aloft in a howling breeze 

May tickle a landsman's taste, 
But the happiest hoars a sailor sees 

Is when he 's down 

At an inland town, 
With his Nancy on his knees, yeo hoi 

And his arm around her waist I 

Then man the capstan off we go, 

As the fiddler swings as round, 
With B yeo heave ho. 
And a ruin below, 

Hurrah for the homeward bound 1 

A wandering minstrel I, etc. 

(Enter PisH-Tusa.) 
Aad what may be your business with Tum-Tu 

Van. Ill tell you. A year ago I wa a member of the Tittpv 
town tend. It wac my duty to take the cap round for contribatioui. 
While AiMhargln* this delicate onto, I saw Two-Tarn. We ton* 

aach other at once, bat she WM betrothed to her guardian, Ko-Ko, 
cheap tailor, and I saw that mj salt was hopeless. Overwhelmed with 
despair, I quitted the town. Judge of my delight when I heard, 
month ago, that Ko-Ko had been condemned to death for flirting! I 
harried back at once, in the hope of finding Tum-Yum at liberty to 
listen to my protestations. 

PUB. It is true that Ko-Ko was condemned to death far flirting, bet 
t was reprieved at the last moment, and raised to the exalted ran* 
of Lord High Executioner under the following remarkable 


Oar great Mikado, virtuous man, 

When he to rule our land began. 

Resolved to try 

A plan whereby 

Young men might best be steadied. 
So he decreed, in words succinct, 
That all who flirted, leered, or winked, 
(Unless connubially linked), 

Should forthwith be beheaded. 
And I expect yon '11 all agree 
That he was right to so decree. 
And I am right, 
And you are right, 
And all is right as right cam be I 

CVOBUS. And I expect, etc. 

This stern decree, you '11 understand, 
Caused great dismay throughout the land; 
For young and old 
And shy and bold 
Were equally affected. 
Hie youth who winked a roving eye, 
Or breathed a non-connubial sigh, 
Was thereupon condemned to die 
He usually objected. 

And you '11 allow, as I expect, 
That he was right to so object 
And I am right, 
And you are right, 
And everything is quite correct I 

CBOBUS. And you '11 allow, as I expect, ett 


And so we straight let out on bail 
A xmvlct from the county jail, 
Whose head was next 
On some pretext 
Condemned to be mown off, 
And made him Headsman, for we taM 
" Who's next to be decaplted 
Cannot cut off another's head 
Until he's cut his own off * 

And we are right, I think yon 11 My, 
To argue in this kind of way. 

And I am right, 

And you are right, 
And all is right too-looral-lay I 

CHOKUS. And they were right, etc. 

[Exeunt CvoBct 
(Enter POOH-BAH.) 

NAM. Ko-Ko, the cheap tailor, Lord High Executioner of Tltipu ! 
Why, that '0 the highest rank a citizen can attain ! 

POOH. It is. Our logical M'kado, seeing no moral difference be- 
tween the dignified judge, who condemns a criminal to die, and the 
Industrious mechanic who carries out the sentence, has rolled the two 
offices into one, and every judge is now his own executioner. 

NANK. But how good of you (for I see that you are a nobleman of 
the highest rank) to condescend to tell all this to me, a mere strolling 
minstrel ! 

POOH. Don't mention it. I am, in point of fact, a particularly 
haughty and exclusive person, of pre-Adamite ancestral descent. You 
win understand this when I tell you that I can trace my ancestry back 
to a protoplasmal, primordial, atomic globule. Consequently, my family 
pride is something inconceivable. I can't* help it. I was born sneer- 
ing. But I struggle hard to overcome this defect. I mortify my 
pride continually. When all the great officers of State resigned in a 
body, because they were too proud to serve under an ex-tailor, did I 
not unhesitatingly accept all their posts at once? 

PISH. And the salaries attached to them? Ton did. 

POOH. It is consequently my degrading duty to serve this upstart 
as First Lord of the Treasury, Lord Chief Justice, Commander-in- 
Chief, Lord High Admiral, Master of the Buck Hounds, Groom of the 
Back Stairs, Archbishop of Titipu, and Lord Mayor, both acting and 
elect, all rolled into one. And at a salary! A Pooh-Bah ' paid for his 
services ! I a salaried minion ! But I do it 1 It revolts me, but I do 

NANK. And it does you credit. 

POOH. But I don't stop at that. I go and dine with middle-clasa 
people on reasonable terms. I dance at cheap suburban parties for a 
moderate fee. I accept refreshment at any hands, however lowly. I 
also retail State secrets at a very low riirure. For instance, any further 
Information about Yum- Yum would come under the head of a Stat 
MCret. (NANKi-Poo taka the hint and gives him money.) (Aide.\ 
Another Insult, and I think a light one t 


Young man, despair, 

Likewise go to. 
Yum- Yum the fair 
You must not woo. 
It will not do : 
I'm sorry for you, 
You very imperfect ahlutioner J 

Tki* Terr day 

From school Yom-Ym 
Will wend her way, 
And homeward cone 
With beat of dram, 
And a rum-tum-tum, 
Y wed the Lord High Executioner! 
And the brass will crash, 
And the trumpet* bray, 
And they '11 cat a dash 

On their wedding day. 
From what I say, you may Infer 
It ' as good as a play for him aad hsv 
She'll toddle away, as all aver, 
With the Lord High Executioner' 

It 'e a hopeless cae. 

A s yon ma; see. 
And in your place 
Away I'd flee; 
But don't blame me 
I'm sorry to be 
Of your pleasure a dlmlnutioMr. 

They'll TOW their pact 
Extremely soon, 

In point of fact 
This afternoon 
Her honeymoon 
With that buffoon 
At seren, commences, so y<w ahum her I 

AIA. The brass will crash, etc. 


And hare I journeyed for a month or nearly 
To learn that Yum-Yum, whom I love so dearl; 
This day to Ko-Ko i.s to he united ! 
The fact appears to be as you 've recited : 
Bat here he comes, equipped as salts his static* 
Hell give you any farther Information. 

Knur Ko-Ko, ttetUed. 

Behold the Lord High Executioner t 
A personage of noble rank aad titk 

A dignified and potent officer, 
Whose functions are particularly vital 

Defer, defer! 
To the noble Lord High Ixecntioaer I 

SOLO. Ko-Ko. 

Taken from the county jail 

By a set of curious chanoM ; 
Liberated then oc bail, 

On my own recognizances : 

Wafted by a favoring f ale 

As one sometimes IB IB trance*, 
To a height tiiat few can scale, 

Bare by long and weary dances ; 
Sorely, never had a male 

Under such like circumstances 
Bo adventurous a tale, 

Which may rank with most romance* 

Behold the Lord High Executioner, etc. 

Ko. Gentlemen, I'm much touched by this reception. I can onij 
trust that by strict attention to duty I shall ensure a continuance oJ 
those favors which it will ever be my study to deserve. If I should 
ever be called upon to act professionally, I am happy to think that 
there will be no difficulty in finding plenty of people whose deaths wll] 
be a distinct gain to society at large. 

Snter PoOH-BlH. 
SONO. Ko-Ko. 

4s some day it may happen that a victim must be fonnd, 

I've got a little list, I've got a little list 
Of social offenders who might well be underground, 
And who never would be missed who never would be missed ! 
There 's the pestilential nuisances who write for autographs. 
All people who have flabby hands and irritating laughs, 
All children who are up in dates, and floor you with 'em flat, 
All persons who in shaking hands shakes hands with you like that, 
And all third persons who on spoiling, tett-b-tetea insist 
They 'd none of 'em be missed they *d none of 'em be missed I 


He 's got 'em on the list he 's got 'era on the list ; 

And they '11 none of 'em be missed they '11 none of 'em be mlMad 

There's the nigger serenader, and the others of his race, 

And the piano organist, I 've got him on the list ; 
And the people who eat peppermint and puff it in your face, 

They never would be missed they never would be missed I 
Then the idiot who praises, with enthusiastic tone, 
All centuries but this, and every country but his own; 
And the lady from the Provinces, who dresses like a guy, 
And who "doesn't think she waltzes," but would rather like to try; 
And that singular anomaly, the lady novelist, 

I don't think she 'd be missed I'm sure she 'd not be ml Mod ! 


He 's got her on the list he 's got her on the list ; 

And I don't think she '11 be missed I'm sure she '11 not be mlissd ' 

And that Nisi Prlus nuisance, who just now is rather rife, 

The judicial humorist, I 've got him on the list t 
ill funny fellows, comic men, and clowns of private life 

They 'd none of 'em be missed they 'd none of 'em be missed ) 

And apologetic statesmen of a compromising kind, 

Such as, What-d ye-caU-hlm, Thing- 'em-bob, and likewise Nevet 


And 'St 'st 'st, and What 's-hls-name, and also Tou-know-who, 
The task of filling up the blanks I 'd rather leave to you. 
But it really does n't matter whom yoa pat upon the list, 
For they 'd none of 'em be missed they 'd none of 'm br mlsend? 


Too may pot 'em on the list yoa may pot 'em on the list , 
And the? '11 none of em be missed - they '11 none of 'em b ml mi I 
Pool-Bab. It seems that the festivities In cnnnerrinn with mv p 
roacrung marriage must last a week T -honid like to do it hand- 
somely, and T want to consult yoa a* to the amount 1 ought to spend 
upon them 

POOH. Certainly In which of my capacities? As First Lord oi 
the Treasury, Ix>rd Chamterlain Attorney-General, Chancellor of the 
Exchequer, Privy Purse, or Private Secretary? 

Ko. Suppose we say as Private Secretary 

POOH. Speaking as your Private Secretary, I should say that as the 
lity will have to pay for it. don't stint yourself, do it well. 

Ko. Exactly : as the city will have to pay for it. That Is your 

POOH. As Private Secretary. Of course you will understand that 
as Lord Chancellor of the Exchequer, I am bound to see that due econ- 
omy is observed. 

Ko. Oh. But yon said just now. ".don't stint yourself, do it well." 
POOH. As Private Secretary. 

Ko. And now you say that due economy must be observed. 
POOH. As Chancellor of the Exchequer. 

Ko. I see. Come over here where the Chancellor can't hear us 
nhey cross stige}. Now, as my Solicitor, how do you advise me to deal 
with this difficulty? 

POOH. Oh, as your Solicitor, 1 should have no hesitation in saying. 
' chance it .** 

Ko. Thank yon (shaking hit hand). I will. 

POOH. If it were not that as Lord Chief Justice, I am bound to see 
t*at the law is n't violated. 

Ko. I see. Come over here where the Chief Justice can't hear us 
(itoy crest the stage). Now, then, as First Lord of the Treasury ? 

POOK. Of course, as First Lord of the Treasury, I could propose s 
special rote that would cover all expenses, if it were not that, as leader 
sf the Opposition, it would be my duty to resist it tooth and nail. Or 
as Paymaster-General, I could so cook the accounts, that as Lord High 
Auditor I should never discover the fraud. But, then, as Archbishop 
f Titipu , it would be my duty to announce my dishonesty and git e my 
self into my own custody as First CommlMtoner of Police 

Ko. That's extremely awkward. 


POOH. I dont say that all these people couldn't be squared; bat 
tt Is right to tell you that I should n't be sufficiently degraded in ny 
own estimation unless I was insulted with a very considerable bribe. 

Ko. The matter shall have my careful consideration. Bat my bride 
and her sisters approach, and any little compliment on your part, such 
as an abject grovel in a characteristic Japanese attitude, would be es- 
teemed a favor. 

Enter procession of YuM-YuM's schoolfellows, heralding Yen-Yin 


Comes a train of little ladies 

From scholastic trammels free, 
Each a little bit afraid is, 

Wondering what the world can be ! 

Is it bst a world of trouble 

Sadness set to song ? 
Is iti<i beauty but a bubble 

Bound to break ere long? 

Are its palaces and pleasures 

Fantasies that fade? 
And the glory of its treasures 

Shadow of a shade ? 

Schoolgirls, we, eighteen and under, 

From scholastic trammels free, 
And we wonder how we wonder 

What on earth the world can be I 

YUM- YUM, PKKP-BO, and Prm-Sura. 

Tn THBKK. Three little maids from school are we, 
Pert as a schoolgirl well can be, 
Filled to the brim with girlish glee, 
Three little maids from school I 

YUM- YUM. Everything is a source of fun. (Chuckle., 

PKKP-BO. Nobody's safe, for we care for none 1 

Prrn-SiNG. Life is a joke that's just begun I (C7k*cAIe.) 
THJC THRKK. Three little maids from school ' 

ALL. (Dancing.) Three little maids who, all unwwf, 
Come from a ladies' seminary, 
Freed from its genius tutelary. 

THE THRKK. (Suddenly demure.) Three little maid* from 

YUM-YUM. One little maid is a bride, Yum- Yum 

PncrBo-. Two little maids in attendance come 

Prrn-Snro. Three little maids is the total sum. 


Turn THUB. Three little Maid* fr 

YUM-YUM. From three little maids take one away 

Pnr-Bo. Two little maids remain, and they 

Prm-8iNG. Won't have to wait very long, they say 
THE THEM. The three little maids from school I 

ALL. (D*nnng.) Three little maids who, all unwary, 
Come from a ladies', seminary, 
Freed from its genius tutelary 

THK THREE. (Suddenly demure.) Three little maids from school* 

Ko. At last, my bride that is to be 1 (About to embrace her.) 

YUM. You 're not going to kiss me before all these people t 

Ko Well, that was the idea. 

YUM (Aside to PEKP-HO.) It seems odd, don't it? 

PEEP. It 's rather peculiar. 

Pirn. Oh, I expect It 's all right. Most hare a beginning, JOB 

YUM. Well, of coarse, I know nothing about these thing* ; bat I *ve 
no objection If It 's asaal. 

Ko. Oh, it 's quite usual, I think. Eh, Lord Chamberlain ! (Appeal- 
ing to POOH-BAH.) 

POOH-BAH. I have known it done. (Ko-Ko embrace* her.) 

YUM. That's over! (Sees NANKI-POO ana rushes to him.) Why, 
that 's never yon? ( The three girls rush to him and shake his hand*, all 

peaking at once.) 

/ YUM. Oh, I 'in so glad ! I have n't seen you for ever so long, and 
/I'm right at the top of the school, and I got three prizes, and I've 
I come home for good, and I 'm not going bacir any more. 

j PBKP. And have you got an engagement? Yum.Yun. t got one, 
/ bat she don't like it, and she 'd ever so much rather it was yon. I *v 
1 come home for good, and I 'm not going nack any more ! 

/ PTTTI. Now, tell us all the news, !> use yon go about everywhere, 
I and we've been at school, but than* goodness that's all over now, 
\ and we 've come home for good, ana - e 're not going back any more ' 

( These three speeches art spoken together in one breath.) 

Ko. I beg your pardon. Will you present me? 
YUM. / Oh, this is the musician who used 
PEEP. -J Oh, this is the gentleman who used 
Pirn. ( Oh, It is only Nanki-Pco who used 
Ko. One at a time, if you please. 

YUM. He 's the gentleman who ased to play M beaatifolly am the - 
tn the 

Pirn. On the Marine Parade. 

TUM Yet, I think that was the name of fee lastrumnt 


KAJTK. Sir, 1 hare the misfortune to IOTO yewr ward, Ywm Ynst 
k, I kmow I deserve your anger t 

Ko. Anger 1 Not a bit, my boy. Why, I lore her myself. Chi 
lag little girl, la n't she? Pretty eyes, nice hair. Taking little thing, 
altogether. Very glad to hear my opinion backed by a competent 
authority. Thank yon very much. Good-bye (to PISH-TUBH.) Take 
him away. (Pisa-TusH remove* Aim.) 

Frrn. (Who hat betn examining POOH-BAH.) I beg your pardon, but 
What is this? Customer come to try on? 

Ko. That is a Tremendous Swell. (She itarts back in alarm.) 

POOH. Go away little girls, can't talk to little girls like you. Gto 
away, there's dears. 

Ko. Allow me to present you, Pooh-Bah. These are my three 
wards. The one in the middle is my bride elect. 

POOH. What do you want me to do to them? Mind, I will not klsu 

Ko. No, no, you shan't kiss them : a little bow, a mere nothing, you 
needn 't mean it, you know. 

POOH. It goes against the grain. They are not young ladies, they 
are young persons. 

Ko. Come, come, make an effort, there's a good nobleman. 

POOH. (Aside to Ko-Ko.) Well, I shan't mean it. ( With a great effort.) 
How de do, how de do, little girls ! (Aside.) Oh, my protoplasmal 
ancestor ! 

Ko. That 's very good. ( Qirlt indulge in supprested laughter. ) 

POOH. I see nothing to laugh at. It is very painful to me to have 
to say, " How de do, how de do, little girls," to young persons. I'm 
not in the habit of saying, " How de do, how de do, little girls," to 
anybody under the rank of a Stockbroker. 

Ko. (Aside to girlt.) Don't laugh at him, he's nnder treatment foi 
It. (Afide to POOH-BAH.) Never mind them, they don't understand 
the delicacy of your position. 

POOH. We kmow how delicate it is, don't we? 

Ko. I should think we did! How a nobleman of your importaaot 
can do it at all is a thing I never can, never shall understand. 

(Ko-Ko retires up and goet of.* 


, Pnr-Bo, AJTD Pirn-Saw. 

So please you, sir, we much regret 
If we have failed in etiquette 
Towards a man of rank so high, 
We shall know better by and by. 
tut youth, of course, must have its ftia, 

So pardon us, 

So pardon ua. 


And don't, in girlhood's happy spring, 

Be bard on as, 

Be hard on n, 
If we 're disposed to dance and slag, 

Tra la la, etc. (Dancinf). 

Omotan or Gnu. Bat youth, of coarse, etc. 

FOOM. I think yon ought to recollect 

Ton cannot show too much respect 
Towards the highly-titled few ; 
Bnt nobody does, and why should yoml 
That youth at us should have Its fli*f , 

Is hard on us, 

Is hard on us ; 
To oar prerogative we cling, 

So pardon us, 

So pardon us, 
If we decline to dance and sing, 

Tra la la, etc. (dancing.} 

CHOKU* or GIRI-S. Bat youth, of coarse, mast have iu Aing, etc. 

Exeunt all but TuM-Tuit 

N AXK. Yam-Turn, at last we are alone 1 I have sought you nigbt 
ind day for three weeks, In the belief that your guardian was beheaded 
and I find that yop are about to be married to him this afternoon ! 

TUM. Vlas, yes ! 

NANK. But you do not lore him? 


NANK. Modified rapture t But why do you not refuse him? 

TUM. What good would that do? He's my guardian, and to 
wouldn't let me marry you ! 

NANK. But I would wait until you were of age ? 

TUM. You forget that in Japan girls do not arrive at yean of dis- 
cretion until they are fifty. 

NANK. True : from seventeen to forty-nine are considered yean of 

TUM. Besides, a wandering minstrel, who plays a wind Instru- 
ment outside tea-houses, ia hardly a fitting husband for the ward of a 
Lord High Executioner. 

NANK. But (Aside.) Shall I tell her? Tesl See will not betray 
me! (Aloud.) What If It should prove that, after all, I am n 
musician ! 

TUM. There 1 I was certain of It, directly I heard you play ! 

NAVK. What if it should prove that I am no other than the son ol 
bis Majesty the Mikado? 

TTTM. The son of the Mikado I Bnt why Is your Highness disguised? 
And what has your Highness dona ? And will your Highness promiM 
mver to do it again ? 


NANK Some years ago I had the misfortune to captivate lacuna 
an elderly lady of my father's court. She mlsconstructed my custom 
ary affability into expressions of affection, and claimed me In marriage, 
ander"my father's law. My father, the Lucius Junin Brutus of hii 
race, ordered me to marry her within a week, or perish ignominously 
on the scaffold. That night I fled his court, and, assuming the dis- 
guise of a Second Trombone. I joined the band in which you found ma 
when I had the happiness of seeing you ! (Approaching her.) 

YUM. (Retreating.) If you please, I think your highness had better 
net come too near. The laws against flirting are excessively severe. 

NANK. But we are quite alone, and nobody can see us. 

YUM. Still that don't make it right. To flirt is Illegal, and we mart 
bey the law. 

NANK. Deuce take the law 1 

YUM. I wish it would, but it wo n't I 

N ANK If it were not for that, how happy we might be \ 

YUM. Happy indeed 1 

NANX. If it were not for the law, we should now be sitting side by 
side , like that. (Sits by her.) 

YUM. Instead of being obliged to sit half a mile off, like that 
( Crosses and tits at other side of ttage. ) 

NANK. We should be gazing into each other's eyes, like that 
(Ajyproaching and gassing at her sentimentally. ) 

YUM. Breathing vows of unutterable love like that. (Siyhinf 
*nd gating lovingly at him.) 

NANK. With our arms round" each other's waists, like that. (Jfm 
bracing her.) 

YUM. Yes ; If it was n't for the law. 

NANK. If It was n't for the law. 

YUM. As it is, of course, we could n't do anything of the kind. 

NANK. Not for worlds ! 

YUM. Being engaged to Ko-ko, you know I K 

NANK. Being engaged to Ko-ko ! 

Dc*r. YuM-YuM and NANKI-POO. 

Were you not to Ko-Ko plighted. 

I would say in tender tone, 
" Loved one, let us be united 

Let us be each other's own ? " 
I would merge all rank and station, 

Worldly sneers are naught to us, 
And to mark my admiration, 

I would kiss you fondly thus [ ! JUr 

J would kiss j f?" 1 fondly thus (MM), 
tie ( me j 

* would kiss \ 1? I fondly thu (M*)- 
Me c me > 

Bat as I'm engaged to Ko-Ko, 
To embrace you thus can fuoc, 
Would distinctly be no JTJ'OCO, 
And for yam I should get toco 

on. Toco, toco, toco, toco I 

NAMK So, In spite of all temptation*, 

Such a theme I '11 not discuss, 
And on no consideration 

Will I kiss yon fondly thus 
Let me make it clear to you, 

This, oh this, oh this, oh this (MMtftf tor) 
This is what I'll never do ! 

(Exeunt in oppotitt direction*.} 

(Enter Ko-Ko.) 

Ko. (Looking after YUM- YUM.) There she goes! To think how 
entirely my future happiness is wrapped up In that little parcelj 
Really, it hardly seems worth while ! Oh, matrimony ! Enter POOH 
BAH and FISH-TUSH.) Now, then, what is it? Can 't you see I'm solil- 
oquizing? Yon have interrupted an apostrophe, sir. 

PISH . I am the bearer of a letter from His Majesty the Mikado ! 

Ko. (Taking it from him reverentially.") A letter from the Mikado! 
What in the world can he have to say to me? (Reads letter.) Ah, 
here it Is at last ! I thought it would come 1 The Mikado is struck 
by the fact that no executions have taken place in Titipu for a year, 
and decrees that unless somebody is beheaded within one month, th 
post of Lord High Executioner shall be abolished, and the city reduced 
to the rank of a village ! 

PUH. But that will Involve us all In Irretrievable ruin I 

Ko. Yes. There 's no help for it, I shall have to execute somebody. 
The only question is, who shall it be? 

POOH. Well, it teems unkind to say so, but as you 're already under 
sentence of death for flirting, everything seems to point to you. 

Ko. Tome? What are you talking about? I can't execute my- 
elf, Recorder f 

POOH. Why not? 

Ko. Why not? Because, in the first place, self-decapitation is ai 
extremely difficult, not to say dangerous, thing to attempt; and, In tb 
second, it's suicide, and suicide is a capital offence. 

POOH. That is so, no doubt. 

PISH. We might reserve that point. 

POOH. True, it could be argued six months hence, before the ful, 

Ko. Besides, I don't see how a man can cut off his own head. 

POOH. A man might try. 

PUH. Even if you only succeeded in cutting it half off, that 
to something. 


POOH, it will be taken M an earnest of your desire to comply wlu 
the Imperial will. 

Ko. No. Pardon me, but there I am adamant. As official heads 
nan, my reputation is at stake, and I can't consent to embark OB 
professional operation unless I see my way to a successful result. 

POOH. This professional conscientiousness is highly creditable to 
you, but it places ns in a very awkward position. 

Ko. My good sir, the awkwardness of yonr position is grace itoeli 
compared with that of a man engaged in the act of cutting off his own 

PISH. I am afraid that, unless yon can obtain a substitute 

Ko. A substitute? Oh, certainly nothing easier (to POOH-BAH) 
Poo-Ban, I appoint you my substitute. 

POOH. I should like it above all things. Such an appointmeat 
would realize my fondest dreams. But no, at any sacrifice, I must Mt 
bounds to my insatiable ambition ! 


M* brain It teems 

With end!e scheme* , 

Both good and new 


But If I flit, 

The benefit 

That I 'd difftue 

The town would IOM! 

Now every man 

To aid his clan 

Should plot and plan 

A well at he can, 
And so, 

I 'm ready to go, 

Yet recollect 

*T were dlrpct 

did I neglect 

To thus effect 

This aim direct, 

Bo I object 

80 I object 

80 1 object 



I am so proud, 
If I allowed 
My family pride 
To be my guide, 
I *d volunteer 
To quit this sphere. 
Instead of you, 
In a minute or two. 
Bat family pride 
Must be denied, 
And aet aaide, 
And mortified, 
And BO, 
I wish to go, 
And greatly pine 
To brightly thine, 
And take the line 
Of a hero flue, 
With grief condign 
I mut decline 
I must decline 
I mutt decline 


I oeard one day, 
A gentleman ay 
That criminal* who 
Are cut In two 
Can hardly feel 
The fatal steel, 
And so are slain 
Without much pain. 
If this Is true 
It ' jolly for yon ; 
Tour courage screw 
To bid us adieu, 
And go 
And show 
Both friend and foe 
How much you dare. 
I 'm quite aware 
It ' your affair, 
Yet I declare 
I 'd take your share, 
Bnt I don't mnch ear 
I don't much care 
I don't much care 

ALL. To sit in solemn silence in a dull, dark dock, 
In a pestilential prison, with a lifelong lock, 
Awaiting the sensation of a short, sharp shock, 
From a cheap and chippy chopper on a big black block t 

Exeunt all but Ko-Ko. 

Ko. This is simply appalling ! 1 , who allow myself to be respited 
at the last moment, simply in order to benefit my native town, am now 
required to die within a month, and that by a man whom I have loaded 
with honor! Is this public gratitude? Is this (Enter NA.VKI-POO 
with a rope in his handt}. Go away, sir! how dare you? Am 1 new 
to be permitted to soliloquize ? 

NAKK. Oh, go on don't mind me. 

Ko. What are you going to do with that rooa ? 


HAKK. I am about to terminate AH unendurable exljtenc*. 
Ko. Terminate yonr existence? Oh, nonsease ! What foi t 
NANK. Because you are going to marry the girl I adore. 

Ko. Nonsense, sir. I won't permit it. I am a humane man, and U 
yon attempt anything of the kind, I shall order your instant arrest. 
Oome, sir, desist at one*, or I summon my guard. 

NANK. That 's absurd. If yon attempt to raise an alarm, I instantly 
perform the happy despatch with this dagger. 

Ko. No, no, don't do that. That is horrible] (Suddenly.') Why, 
you cold-blooded scoundrel, are you aware that, in taking your life. 
you are committing a crime which which which U Ok ! 
(Struck by an idea.') ' 

NANE. What'a the matter? 

Ko. la it abolutely certain that you are resolved to die? 

NAKK. Absolutely ! 

Ko. Will nothing shake yonr resolution? 

NANK. Nothing. 

Ko. Threats, entreaties, prayers all useless ? 

NANK. All I My mind is made up. 

Ko. Then, if you really mean what you say, and if yon are abso- 
lutely resolved to die, and if nothing whatever will shake your deter- 
mination don't spoil yourself by committing suicide, but be beheaded 
handsomely at the hands of the Public Executioner ! 

NANK. I don't see how that would benefit me. 

Ko. Ton don't? Observe : you '11 have a month to live, and you 11 
live like a fighting cock at my expense. When the day comes there'll 
be a grand public ceremonial you '11 be the central figure no one 
will attempt to deprive you of that distinction. There Ml be a proces- 
sion bands dead march bells tolling all the girls in tears- 
Turn- Yum distracted then, when it's all over, general rejoicings, and 
a display of fireworks in the evening. You won't see them, but they '11 
be there all the same. 

NANK. Do yon think Turn-Turn would really be distracted at my 

Ko. I am convinced of it. Bless you, she 's the most tender-hearted 
little creature alive. 

NANK. I should be sorry to cause her pain. Perhaps, after all, if I 
were to withdraw from Japan, and travel In Europe for a couple of 
years, I might contrive to forget her. 

Ko. Oh, I don't think you could forget Yum-Tum so easily, and, 
after all, what is more miserable than a love-blighted life? 

NANK. True. 

Ko. Life without Yum- Yum, why It seems absurd t 
NANK. And yet there are a good many people IB the world v W 
tare to endure it. 
Ko. Poor devils, yes 1 Tou are quite right not to be of kheir nnml 


NAH. (/Suddenly.) I won't be of their number I 

Ko. Noble fellow ! 

NANK. I '11 tell you how we '11 manage it. Let me marry Yam-Yam 
la-morrow, and in a month yon may behead me. 

Ko. No, no. I draw the line at Yum-Yum. 

NANK. Very good. If you can draw the line, so can I. (Prepmrinf 

Ko. Stop, stop. Listen one moment, be reasonable. How can I 
consent to your marrying Yum-Yum if I 'm going to marry her myself? 

NANK. My good friend, she '11 be a widow in a month, and you can 
marry her then. 

Ko. That's true, of course. I quite see that; but, dear me, my 
position during the next month will be roost unpleasant most un- 
pleasant ! 

NANK. Not half so unpleasant as my position at the end of it. 

Ko. But dear me well I agree after all, it's only putting 
off my wedding for a month. But you won't prejudice her against me, 
will you ? You see 1' ve educated her to be my wife ; she 's been taught 
to regard me as a wise and good man. Now I should n't like her view* 
on that point disturbed. 

NANK. Trust me, she shall never learn the truth from OQB. 


tnter CHOBUS, POOH-BAH, and Pun-Tun. 

With aspect stern 

And gloomy stride, 
We come to learn . 

How yon decide. 

Don't hesitate 

Your choice to name, 
A dreadful fate 

You '11 suffer all the same. 

POOH . To ask you what you mean to do we punctually appear 

Ko. Congratulate me, gentlemen, I 'ye found a volunteer I 

ALL. The Japanese equivalent for Hear, Hear, Hear! 

Ko. (Presenting him.") 'T is Nanki-Poo ! 

ALL. Hail Nanki-Poo! 

Ko. I think he '11 do? 

Au.. Yes, yes, he '11 do ! 

Ko. He yields his life if I' 11 Yum-Yum surrender; 

Now I adore that girl with passion tender, 
And could not yield her with a ready will, 

Or her allot 

If I did not 
Adore myself with passion tenderer still I 


ALL. A*, y e I 

H IOTM hlmaelf with passl*! traaarar still t 
Co. ( To NAJTO-POO.) Take her, she ' yours I 

AUer TtDf-ToM. Pccr-Bo. and Prrn-Sara. 
NAMK mud Tun-Tun Oh. rapture! 


TuM-Trw and NINKI-POO. The threatened cloud hM p****4 
And brightly shines the dawning day ; 
What though the night may come too 
There 's yet a month of afternoon ! 
Then let the throng 
Our Joy advance, 
With laughing song. 
And merry dance, 

With joyous shout and ringing cheer, 
Inaugurate oar brief career I 

CHORUS. Then let the throng, etc. 

Prrn-SiNG. A day, a week, a month, a year, 
Or be It far, or be it near, 
Life's eventime comes ranch too _ 
Yon '11 live at least a honey moos I 

Then let the throng, etc. 


As in three weeks yon 've got to dU. 

If Ko-Ko tells us true, 
T were empty compliment to cry 

Long life to Nanki-Poo ! 
Bnt as you 've got three waeks to live 

As fellow citizen, 
This toatit with three times three well fir*, 

" Long life to you till then ! " 

OHOBUB. May all good fortune prosper you, 

May yon hare health and riches too, 
May yon succeed in all you do. 
Long life to yon till then t 

Enter K ATIBH A 
CAT. Tour revels cease, assist me all of you 1 

CHOBUS. Why who is this whose evil eyes 

Rain blight on our festivities? 
HAT. I claim my perjured lover, Nankl-Poo! 

Oh, fool t to shun delights that never cloy I 
Come back, oh, shallow fool I come back to Joy ' 

CBOBUI. Go, leave thy deadly work undcme ; 
Away, away I Ill-favored one 


IT AM- (Atid* to YUM-YUM.) Ah! 
The maid of whom I told yon. (Abovt to py 

KAT. (Dttmininff Aim.) No! 

Ton shall not go, 

These arms shall thus enfold yon t 


(AMrmfaf NAUD-POO.) Oh fool, that flees t 

My hallowed joys I 
Oh blind, that seest 

No equipoise I 
Oh rash, that judges, 

From half, the whole 1 
Oh base, that grudgest 
Love's lightest dole ! 
Thy heart unbind, 
Oh fool, oh blind ! 
Give me my place, 
Oh rash, oh base ! 

CMOHTT*. If she's thy bride, restore her place, 
Ob fool, oh blind, oh rash, oh b*s ! 

Yuu-YuM.) Pink cheek thai rulest 

Where wisdom serve* 1 
Bright eye, that Coolest 

8tccl-tempere<i nerves; 
Rose-lip, that scornest 

Lore-laden years, 
Sweet tongue, that warn**. 
Who rightly hears, 
Thy doom is nigh, 
Pink cheek, bright eye I 
Thy knell is rung, 
Rose-lip, sweet tongue 

CMOBTTS. If true her tale, thy knell is rung, . 

Pink cheek, bright eye, rose-lip, sweet tongue I 

Prrn-8me. Away, nor prosecute your quest, 

From our intention well expressed, 

You cannot turn us ! 
The state of your connubial views 
Towards the person you accuse 

Does not concern us ! 
For he's going to marry Ynm-Yum. 

Yum- Yum I 

Pirn. Your angry pray bury, 

For all will be merry, 
I think you had better succumb. 
Cumb comb! 

Pi 1 11. And Join our expressions of gle, 

On this subject I pray you be dumb. 


Dumb - dumb I 

Pirn. Ton '11 find there are many 

Who '11 wed for a penny 
The word for your guidance is " Mum" 

AM.. Mam mam! 

Prrn There '* lot '8 of good fish in th seal 

Atjt. There 's lota of good flub in the sea ! 

And yon '11 find there are many , * 

Soix>. KATIBHA. 

The hoar of gladness 

Is dead and gone ; 
In silent sadness 

I live alone ! 
The hope 1 cherished 

All lifeless lies, 
And all has perished 

Sare love, which never diet I 

Oh, faithless one, this insult 700 shall me : 

In rain for mercy on your knees yon 11 so* 

I '11 tear the mask from your disguising ! 

NAJK- (Atide.i Now comes the blow 1 

KAT. Prepare yourself for news surprising t 

SAM. (Atidf,.} How foil ray foe? 

KAT. No minstrel he, despite brarado 1 

YUM. (Aside ttruck by an idea.) Ha! ha! I know ! 
KAT. He is the son of your 

NAsn-Poo end Ytm-YCM, interrupting, ting Japan*** wenb to 

her voice.) 

O ni ! bikkuri shakknri to I 
O sal bikkari shakkuri to! 

CAT. In Tain yon interrupt with this tornd > 

He is the only son of yonr 

A LJL. O ni ! bikkuri shakknri to ! 

KAT. I '11 spoil 

AIJU Oni! bikkuri shakkuri to! 

K.AT Yonr gay gamb*di 

He is the son 

Aio. O ml! bikkurt shakkurl to i 

KAT. Of yomr 

Omil bikkuri shakkmrl v* ' 



T torrents roar I 

Te tempests howl 1 
Tour wrath outpour 
With angry growl ! 
Do ye your worst, my vengeance 


Shall rise triumphant over all ! 
Prepare for woe, 

Te haughty lords, 
At once I go 

Mikado- wards, 
Aod when he learns his son la 


liy wrongs with vengeance will 
be crowned ! 


We '11 hear no more 

Ill-omened owl 1 
To joy we soar, 

Despite your scowl 
The echoes of our festival 
Shall rise triumphant over all 
Away you go, 

Collect your hordes j 
Proclaim your woe 
In dismal chords ; 
We do not heed their diaoaai 

For joy reigns everywhere aroud t 

ruke fwioutly uf rtope, clearing tie crowd away riekt 
itfl, jf nfeMitf * ittft mt tk tat* of ita^e. } 


-I u M dtowwred Mated at tier bridal toilet, turrvunded fry 
w*0 ar dreMt'n? *r hair, and painting \er foot and lip*, at kt judgtt 
tftkt f*A in a mirror. 

CKNE. Ko-Ko's iJardsn. 


Braid the raven hair, 

Weare the supple tress. 
Deck the maiden fn'r, 

In her loveliness. 
Paint the pretty fac. 

Dye the coral Up, 
Emphasize the grace 

Of her ladyship I 
Art and nature thus allied, 

Go to make a pretty brio*. 

SOLO. Prrn-Swo. 

Sit with downcast eye, 

Let It brim with dew. , 

Try If you can cry, 

We will do so, too. 
When yon 're summoned start, 

Like a frightened roe . 
Flutter, little heart. 

Color, come and go ' 
Modesty at marriage- t.'de 
Well becomes a pretty I ride. 

Braid the raven hair, etc, Sz^unt C\or*. 

Tun. (Looking at herttlf in glass.) Yes, I am Indeed beautlfal! 
Sometimes I sit and wonder, In my artless Japanese way, why It ti 
that I am so much more attractive than anybody else In the whole 
world ? Can this be vanity? No ; Nature Is lovely, and rejoices l 
her loveliness. I am a child of Nature, and take after my mother. 


The SOB whose ray* 
Are all ablaze 
With ever-living flory 


DON not deny 

His majesty, 

He scorns to tell a story \ 
He don't exclaim, 
" I blush for shame 

So kindly be indulgent." 
Bat, fierce and bold, 
In flery gold, 
He glories all effulgent ! 
I mean to rale the earth 

As he the sky, 
We really know oar wont 
The son and I. 

Observe his flame, 
That placid dame, 

The moon's Celestial HlgkMM , 
There's not a trace 
Upon her face 

Of diffidence or shyness 
She borrows light 
That, through the night, 

Mankind may all acclaim bar ' 
And, truth to tell, 
She lights op well, 
So I, for one don't blame her 1 
Ah, pray make no mistake. 

We are not shy ; 
We 're very wideawake, 
The moon and I. 

Tent. Ye*, everything seems to smile upon me. I am to be mar- 
ried to-day to thfc man I love best, and I believe I am the very hap pie* 
firl in Japan. 

PKXP. The happiest girl indeed, for she is indeed to be envied who 
has obtained happiness in all-bat perfection. 

YUM. Is " all-bat " perfection? 

Pro. Well, dear, it can't be denied that the fact thai yoor husband 
Is to be beheaded in a month is, in its way, a drawback 
Pirn. I don't know about that. It all depends ! 
Pncr. At all events he will find it a drawback. 
Pirn. Not necessarily. Bless you, it all depends ! 

Ten. (In tears.} I think It very Indelicate of you to refer to rock 
abject on such a day. If my married happiness it to be to be 
Pur Cat short. 
Tim. Well, cat short in a month, can 't you let me forget it? 


(Enter N AND- Poo follrwtd by PiBH-Tvn.) 
HAHK. run-Turn in tears and on her wedding morn? 

Tux. (Sobbing.) They 've been reminding me that In a month you 'r 
t to toksaded (Burnt into teart. ^ 


Pirn. TM, we *re been reminding her that 700 "re to be behead**. 

(Muntt into tear*.) 

PMKP. It's quite true, 700 know ; 700 are to be beheaded. 

NANK. (Artfo.) Humph! How some bridegrooms would be de- 
pressed by this sort of thing! (Aloud.) A month? Well, what's a 
Month? Bah! These divisions of time are pa rely arbitrary. Wa* 
says twenty-four hoars make a day ? 

Pirn. There 's a popalar impression to that effect. 

NAXK. Then we '11 efface It. We '11 call each second a mlnote 
each minute an hour each hoar a day and each day a year. Ai 
that rate we 'ye about thirty years of married happiness before a* I 

PKKP. And at that rate, this interview has already lasted four hoar* 
and three quarters 1 (Exit PEEP-BO.) 

YUM. (Still tabbing.) Yes. How time flies when one is thenmghly 
enjoying one's self! 

NANK. That's the way to look at it ! Do n't let 's be dowmhearted : 
There 's a silver lining to every cloud. 

Yuif. Certainly. Let 's let 's be perfectly happy I . (Alt 

PISH. By all means. Let 's let 's thoroughly enjoy ouiselvt 

Pirn. It 's It 's absurd to cry I ( Trying to font m la-*gk.) 

YUM. Quite ridiculous 1 (Trying to laufk.) 

(All break into a forced and melancholy laugh.) 

YUM-YUM, Prrn-Sura, Nxmti-Poo, and PMH-TI 

Brightly dawns oar wedding day ; 
Joyous hoar, we give thee greeting I 
Whither, whither art thou fleeting? 

Fickle moment, prithee stay ! 
What though mortal joys be hohewf 
Pleasures come, If sorrows follow; 

Though the tocsin sound, ere long, 
Ding dong ! Ding dong ! 

Yet until the shadows fall 

Over one and over all, 

Stag a merry madrigal 
A madrigal ! 

Pal-la fal-la! etc. (Ending in tear*.) 

Let as dry the ready tear, 

Though the hours are surely rrseplag. 

Little need for wofnl weeping, 
Till the sad sundown is near. 

All must sip the cup of sorrow, 

I to-day, and thou to-morrow; 
Thii the close of every song 

Dtajr dong f Ding dong ; 


What, though solemn shadow* fall, 
Sooner, later, over all 1 
Sing a merry madrigal 

A madrigal 
Fal-la fal-la I etc. (Ending in tean.) 

[Exeunt Prrn-SiNO and PBM-Twam 

Ram-Poo embrace YuM-YuM. Enter Ko-Ko N ANn-Poo retawM 


Ko. Gk> on don 't mind me. 

NAUK. I 'm afraid we 're distressing you. 

Ko. Never mind ; I must get used to it. Only please do it by de- 
gree*. Begin by putting your arm round her waist (N ANTCI-POO d&et 
to.) There ; let me get used to that first. 

YUM. Oh, would n't you like to retire ? It must pain yon to see as w 
affectionate together I 

Ko. No ; I must learn to bear it t Now oblige me by allowing her 
head to rest on your shoulder. (He doe* so Ko-Ko much affected.) I 
am much obliged to you. Now kiss her! (He does so Ko-Ke 
writhes with anguish.) Thank you it 's simple torture I 

YUM. Come, come, bear up. After all it 's only for a month. 
Ko. No. It 's no use deluding oneeelf with false hopes. 
What do you mean ? 

Ko. ( To YUM-YUM.) My child my poor child ! (Aside.) How shall 
I break it to her? (Aloud.) My little bride that was to have been 

YUM. (Delighted.) Was to have been ! 
Ko. Yes, yon never can be mine I 
YUM. (In ecstacy.) What ! ! ! 

Ko. I have just ascertained that, by the Mikado's law, when a Mar- 
ried man is beheaded his wife is buried alive. 

YUM*'} Buriod* 1 ! 1 

Ko. Buried alive. It 's a most unpleasant death 
NAN*. But whom did you get that from ? 
Ko. Oh, from Pooh-Bah. He 's my solicitor 
YUM. But he may be mistaken. 

Ko. So I thought, so I consulted the Attorney-General, the Lord 
Chief Justice, the Master of the Rolls, the Judge Ordinary and the 
Lord Chancellor. They 're all of the same opinion. Never knew such 
unanimity on a point of law in my life ! 

NANK. But stop a bit ! This law has never been put in force ? 

Ko. Net yet. Yon see, flirting is the only crime punishable witk 
decapitation, and married men never flirt. 

NAN*. Of course they don't. I quite forgot that ! Well, I flap 
oee I may take tt that my dream of happiness is at an end I 


YUM. Darling, I don't want to appear selfish , and I lore 700 wit* 
all my heart ; I don't suppose I shall ever lore anybody else half as 
mnch but when I agreed to marry you my own I had mo Idea 
pet that I should hare to be buried alive In a month ! 

NANK. Nor II It 's the very first I 're heard of It I 

Y KM It it makes a difference, don't it? 

NAM* It doe* make a difference, of course. 

Yen. You see burial alive It's such a stuffy death! Yn SM 
mj difficulty, don't you ? 

SANK. Tea, and I see my own. If I insist on your carrying oat 
four promise, I doem you to a hideous death; if I release yon, yo 
airy Ko-Ko at once ! 

Two. YUM-TUM, NANKI-PO, and Ko-Ko. 

YUM Here 's a how-de-d I 

If I marry you, 

When your time has come to perish. 
Then the maiden whom you cherish 

Must be slaughtered too ! 

Here 's a how-de-do 1 

H AM*. Here 's a pretty mess ! 

In a month or less, 
I must die without a wedding ! 
Let the bitter tears I 'in shedding 

Witness my distress. 

Here 's a pretty mess I 

Kc Here 's a state of things ! 

To her life she clings I 
Matrimonial devotion 
Does n't seem to suit her notion. 

Burial it brings I 

Here 's a state of things ! 

YUM- YUM and NAinn-Po. Ko-Ko. 

With a passion that 's intense With a passion that 's intense 

I worship and adore, You worship and adore, 

Bat the laws of common sense But the laws of common sense 

We ought n't to ignore. You ought n't to Ignore. 

If what he says is true, If what I say is true, 

It is death to marry you I It is death to marry yoa ! 

Here 's a pretty state of things I Here 's a pretty state of things I 

Here 's a pretty how-de-do I Here 's a pretty how-de-do I 


Ko. (0mf p to NAina-Poo. ) My peor boy, I'm really very sorrj 
tor 70*. 

HAWK. Thamks, old fellow 1 m sure yoa are 

to. You see I *m qnlte belple 

RAJTK. I quit* wjt that. 

Ko. I can't conceive anything more distressing than u> tive one'i 
uuriage broken off at the last moment. But yon shan't be disap- 
pointed of a wedding, you shall come to mine. 

NANK . It ' awfully kind of yon, bnt that 's impossible. 
Ko. Why so? 
NANS. To-day 1 die. 
Ko. What do you mean ? 

NANK. I can 't live without Yam-Yum. This afternoon I pcrfom 
die Happy Despatch. 

Ko. No, no pardon me I can 't allow that. 
NANK. Why not? 

Ko. Why, hang it all, you 're under contract to die by the hand of 
the Public Executioner in a month's time? If you kill yourself, what 's 
to become of me ? Why, I shall have to be executed in your place ! 

NANK. It would certainly seem so I 

(Enter POOH-BAH.) 

Ko. Now, then, Lord Mayor, what is it? 

POOH. The Mikado and his suite are approaching the city, and will 
be here in ten minutes. 

Ko. The Mikado I He's coming to see whether his orders have 
been carried out I (To NANKI-POO.) Now look here, you know this 
is getting serious a bargain 's a bargain, and yon really must n't frus- 
trate the ends of justice by committing suicide. As a man of honor 
and a gentleman, you are bound to die ignominiously by the hand* of 
the Public Executioner. 

NAKK. Very well, then behead me. 

Ko. What, now? 

NANK. Certainly ; at once. 

Ko. My good sir, I do n't go about prepared to execute gentlemen 
at a moment's notice. Why, I never even killed a blue-bottle ! 

*OOH. Still, as Lord High Executioner, 

Ko. My good sir, as Lord High Executioner, I 're got to beheaa 
him in a month. I' m not ready yet. I don't know how It 's done. I *m 
going to taKe lessons . I . mean to begin with a guinea pig, and work 
my way through the animal kingdom till I come to a second trombone. 
Why, you don't suppose Chat, as a humane man, I 'd have accepted the 
post of Lord High Executioner, if I had n't thought the duties were 
purely nominal ? I can 't kill yon I can 't kill anything I ( Weep*. ) 

NAOTL Come, my poor fellow, we all have unpleasant duties to dis- 
charge at times ; after all, what is It? If I don't mind, why should 
you? Remember, sooner or later it must be done. 

Ko. (8pri*fi*f q MtdtfetUy.) Must ttf I'm not M> van ab 


M AXE. What do you iae*n ? 

Ko. Why should 1 kill yoa, whea making an affidavit that 700 T 
been executed will do Just a* well? Here are plenty of witneases 
the Lord Chief Justice and Lord High Admiral, Commander-in-chief. 
Secretary of State for the Home Department, First Lord of the Treas- 
ury, and Chief Commissioner of Police. They '11 all swear to it wont 

POOH. Am I to understand that all of us high Officers of State an 
required to perjure ourselves to ensure your safety ? 

Ko. Why not ? Ton '11 be grossly Insulted, as usual. 
POOH. Will the Insult be cash down, or at a date? 
Ko. It will be a ready money transaction. 

POOH. (Aside.} Well, it will be a useful discipline. (Aloud.) Very 
good. Choose your fiction, and I'll endorse it I (Aridc.) Hal ha) 
Family pride, how do you like that, my buck? 

NANK. But I tell you that life without Turn-Turn 

Ko. Oh, Turn-Turn, Yum-TumI Bother Turn-Turn I Here Com- 
missionaire (to POOH-BAH), go and fetch Yum- Yum. (Exit POOH-BAH.) 
Take Turn-Turn, and marry Turn-Turn; only go away and never comt 
back again. (Enter POOH-BAH with YUM- YUM and Pirn-Seta.) Hen 
he is. Turn-Tom, are you particularly busy? 

YUM. Not particularly. 

Ko. Tou 're fire minutes to spare ? 

TUM. Tes. 

Ko. Then go along with mis Grace the Archbishop of Tltlpu ; he 'U 
marry you at once. 

YUM. But if I 'm to be buried alive ? 

Ko. Now, don i ask any questions, bat do as T tell yon, and Nankl 
Poo will explain all. 
NAKK. But, one moment 

Ko. Not for worlds. Here comes the M .do, no doubt to ascertaia 
whether I 're obeyed his decree ; and if he tads you alive, I shall bar* 
ihe greatest difficulty in persuading him that I 've beheaded yon. 
(Xxeunt NAND-POO and TuM-Tuii, followed 6y POOH-BAH.) Clo 
thing that, for here he comes. 

. Enter proceuion, keraWnf MlKADO trftA KATOBA 


(" JfcreA ,// the Mikado'* troop*.*) 

Miya sama, ralya aama, 

On ma no maye ni 

Pira-Plra surn no wa 


Toko tony ar6 toe var6 na I 

Dun. Mix AO and KATUBA. 

From every kind of man 

Obedience I expect ; 
I 'm the Emperor of Japan 

And I 'm MM daughter-in-law elect! 
He '11 marry his son 
(He has only got one), 

To his daughter-in-law elect. 

Mm My morals have been declared 

Particularly correct. 

CAT But they 're nothing at all, compare! 

With those of his daughter-in-law 

Bow Bow 
To his daughter-in-law elect. 

ALL. Bow Bow 

To his daughter-in-law elect. 

Mm In a fatherly kind of way 

I govern each tribe and sect, 
All cheerfully own my sway 

KAT. Except his daughter-in-law elect! 

As tough as a bone, 
With a will of her own, 
Is his daughter-in-law elect! 

Mix My nature is love and light 

My freedom from all defect 

EAT. Is insignificant quite, 

Compared with his daughter-in-law 

Bow Bow 
To his daughter-in-law elect I 

B*w Bow 
To his daughter-in-law elect I 


A more humane Mikado never 
Did In Japan exist, 

To nobody second, 

I 'm certainly reckoned 
A true philanthropist. 
It la my very humane endeavor 
To make to some extent, 

Each evil liver 

A running river 
Of harmless merriment. 

My object all sublime 
I shall achieve in time 
To let the punishment fit the crtae - 
The punishme 'm 


And make each prisoner peat 
Unwillingly represent 
4 source of innocent merriment, 
Of Innocent merriment. 

411 prosy dull society sinners 
Who chatter and bleat and bore. 

Are sent to hear sermons 

From mystical Germans 
Who preach from ten to four. 
The amateur tenor, whose vocal 
All desire to shirk, 

Shall, during off- hours. 

Exhibit his powers 
To Madame Tussaud's wax-work. 

The lady who dies a chemical yellow 
Or stains her gray hair puce, 
Or pinches her figger, 
Is blacked like a nigger 
With permanent walnut Juice. 
The idiot who, in railway carriage*, 
Scribbles on window panes. 
We only suffer 
To ride on a buffer 
!n parliamentary trains. 

My object all sublime, etc. 

The advertising quack who wearies 
With tales of countless cures. 

His teeth I 'v enacted, 

Shall all be extracted 
By terrified amateurs. 
The music-hall singer attends a series 
Of masses and fugues and " opp* " 

By Bach interwoven 

With Spohr and Beethoven. 
At classical Monday Pops. 

The billiard sharp, whom any one catch**, 
His doom 's extremely hard 

He's made to dwell. 

In a dungeon cell 
On a spot that's always barred. 
And there he plays extravagant matches 
In fltless finger stalls 

On a cloth unirue 

With a twls'cd cue, 
And elliptical billiard balls! 

My object all sublime, etc. 

(Enter POOH-BAH, who handt a paper to Ko-Ko.) 

JU>. I am honored In being permitted to welcome your Majesty, 
[fuess the object of your Majesty's visit, your wishes have bee* 
attended to. The execution has taken place. 


Mix. Oh, you're had an execution, hare you? 

Kb. The coroner has just handed me his certificate. 

POOH. I am the Coroner. (Ko-Ko hands certificate to MIKADO.) 

Mix (Reads). " At Titipu, in the presence of the Lord Chancellor, 
Lord Chief Justice, Attorney-General, Secretary of State for the HOOM 
Department, Lord Mayor and Groom of the Second Floor Front." 

POOH. They were all present, your Majesty. I counted them my 

MIK. Very good house. I wish I'd been in time for the 

Ko. A tough fellow he was, too, a man of gigantic strength ; kif 
struggle* were terrific. It was really a remarkable scene. 

TRIO. Ko-Ko, Prrn-SiNG and POOH-BAH. 

Ko. The criminal cried, as he dropped him down. 

In a state of wild alarm ; 
With a frightful, frantic, fearful frown 

I bared my big right arm. 
I seized him by his little pig-tail, 

And on his knees fell he, 

As he squirmed and straggled 

And gurgled and guggled, 
I drew my snickersnee ! 

Oh never shall I 

Forget the cry, 
Or the shriek that shrieked a, 

As I gnashed my teeth, 

When from its sheath 
I drew my snickersnee. 


We know him well, 

He cannot tell 
Untrue or groundless tales , 

He always tries 

To utter lies, 
And every time he fails. 

Prm-8iHO. He shivered and shook as he gave the siga 

For the stroke he didn't deserve ; 
When ail of a sadden his eye met mine, 

And it seemed to brace his nerve, 
For he nodded his head and kissed hie hand 
And he whistled an air, did he ! 

As the sabre true 

Cut cleanly through 
His servical vertebrae ! 

When a man's afraid, 

A beautiful maid 
! a cheering sight to see 

And its oh, I'm glad. 

That moment sad 
WM soothed by sight of m* i 


Her terrible tale 

Too cant assail. 
With troth It quite agrees . 

Her taste exact 

For faultle.sH fact 
Amounts to a disease. 

Now though you'd have said that head was 

(For its owner dead was he), 
It stood on its neck with a smile well bred, 

And bowed three times to me I 
It was none of your Impudent off-hand nod*. 
But as humble as could be. 
For it clt arly knew 
The deference due 
To a man of pedigree ! 
And its oh. I TOW, 
This deathly bow 
Waa a touching sight to see ; 
Though trunkless, yet 
It couldn't forget 
Tho deference due to me J 


This haughty youth 
He speaks the truth 
Whenever he finds it pays, 
And in this case 
It all took place 
Exactly as he says I [Exeunt CHOBUS. 

Mix. All this is very Interesting, and I should like to hare seen it. 
But we came about a totally different matter. A year ago my son, the 
heir to the throne of Japan, bolted from our imperial court. 

Ko. Indeed? Had he any reason to be dissatisfied with his posi- 

KAT. None whatever. On the contrary, I wan going to marry him 
yet he fled I 

POOH. I am surprised that he should have fled from one so lovely I 

KAT. That 's not true. Ton hold that 1 am not beautiful because 
my face is plain. But you know nothing; you are still unenlightened. 
Learn, then, that it is not in the lace alone that beauty is to be sought. 
But I have a left shoulder-blade that is a miracle of loveliness. Peo- 
ple come miles to see it. My right elbow has a fascination that few 
can resist. It is on view Tuesdays and Fridays, on presentation of 
visit ing card. As for my circulation, it is the largest in the world. 
Observe this ear. 

Ko. Large. 

KAT. Large? Enormous! But think of its delicate Internal 
mechanism. It is fraught with beauty] As for this tooth, it almost 
rtsnili alone. Many have tried to draw it, but in vain. 


Ko. And yet he fled ! 

Mix. And Is now masquerading in this town, disguised M a 

Ko. ) 

POOH. > A second trombone ! 

Pirn. J 

MIK. Yes ; would it be troubling yon too much If I asked you to 
produce him? He goes by the name of Nanki-Poo. 
Ko. Oh, no ; not at all only 
MIK. Tes? 

Ko. It 's rather awkward, but In point of fact, he *s gone abroad ! 
MIK. Gone abroad ! His address 1 
Ko. Knightsbridge ! 

KAT. ( Who is reading certificate of death.) Ha I 
Mm. What 's the matter? 

KAT. See here his name Nanki-Poo beheaded this morning. 
Oh, where shall I find another! Where shall I find another? 

(Ko-Ko, POOH-BAH, and Prrri-SiNO, fall on their knee.) 

MIK. (Looking at paper.) Dear, dear, dear; this is very tiresome. 
(To Ko-Ko.) My poor fellow, In your anxiety to carry out my wishes, 
you have beheaded the heir to the throne of Japan ! 

C Ko. But I assure you we had no idea 
Together. 2 POOH. But. indeed, we didn't know 

( PITTI. We really had n't the least notion 

MIK. Of course you hadn't. How could you? Come, come, my 
good fellow, don't distress yourself it was no fault of yours. If 
man of exalted rank chooses to disguise himself as a second trom- 
bone, he must take the consequences. It really distresses me to se* 
you take on so. I 've no doubt he thoroughly deserved all he got. 
(They rise.} 

Ko. We are Infinitely obliged to your Majesty 

MIK. Obliged? not a bit. Don't mention it. How could you tellT 

POOH. No, of course we could n't know that he was the Heir- 

Pirn. It was n't written on his forehead, you know. 

Ko. It might have been on his pocket handkerchief, bnt Japanese 
don't use pocket handkerchiefs ! Ha I ha ! ha I 

Mnr. Hal ha! ha! (To KAT.) I forget the punishment for com* 
passing the death of the Heir-Apparent. 

Ko. ) 

POOH. > Punishment! (They drop down on their knees again., 
Pirn, j 

MIK. Yes. Something lingering, with boiling oil In It, I fancy. 
Something of that sort I think boiling oil occurs in it, but I'm not 

ore. I know it* something humorous, bat lingering, with Ithw 
boiling oil or melted lead. Come, come, dont fret I'm not a Ml 

Ko. (In abject terror.) If yonr majesty will accept oar sirimrsiui. 
we had no Idea 

MIK. Of course you had n't. That 's the pathetic part of it. Unfor- 
tunately the fool of an act says "compassing the death of the Heir- 
Apparent." There 's not a word about a mistake, or not knowing, or 
having no notion. There should be, of course, but there Un"V 
That 's the slovenly way in which these acts are drawn. However, 
cheer up, It '11 be all right. I '11 have it altered next session. 

Ko. What 's the good of that? 

MIK. Now let 's see. Will after luncheon suit you? Can yon wait 
till then? 

Ko., PTTTI, and POOH. Oh, yes, we can wait till then I 

Mix. Then we '11 make it after luncheon. I 'm really very sorry for 
you all, bat It's an unjust world, and virtue is triumphant only IB 
theatrical performances. 

MIKADO, KATISUA, Ko-Ko, POOH-BAH, and Prrn-8iK. 

Mix. and KAT. See how the Fates their gifts allot. 
For A is happy B Is not. 
Yet 15 is worthy, I dare say, 
Of more prosperity than A ! 

K.O., POOH, and Prrn. 7s B more worthy? 

MIK. and KAT. 1 should say 

He 's worth a great deal more than A. 

Yet A is happy ! 

Oh, so happy I 
Laughing, Ha! ha! 
ENSKHBLK. Chaffing, Ha! ha! 

Nectar quaffing, Hal ha I ha ha! 
Ever joyous, ever gay, 
Happy, undeserving A ! 

Ko., POOH, and Prrn. If I were fortune which I 'm o* 
B should enjoy A's happy lot. 
And A should die in miserie 
That Is assuming I am B 

MIK and KAT. But should A perish? 

Ko, POOH, and Pirn. That should be. 

(Of course, assuming I am B.) 
B should be happy I 

Oh, so happy ! 
Laughing, Ha! hal 
Chaffing, Ha! ha! 
Nectar quaffing, Ha! hat ha! h*< 
Bat condemned to die Is he, 
Wretched, meritorious B I 

Jfeeunt MIKAPO 


Ko. Well I a nlc mess yon 've got us Into, with your nodding head 
and the deference due to a man of pedigree ! 

POOH. Merely corroborative detail, Intended to give artistic veri- 
similitude to a bald and unconvincing narrative. 

Pirn. Corroborative detail Indeed ! Corroborative fiddlestick I 

Ko. And you 're just as bad as be is, with your cock-and-a-bnll 
stories about catching his eye, and his whistling an air. But that 'a so 
like yon I You must put in your oar I 

POOH. But how abont your big right arm ? 
Pirn Yes, and your snickersee ! 

Ko. Well, well, never mind that now. There 's only one thing to 
be done. Nanki-Poo has n't started yet he must come to life again at 
once. ( Enter NANKI-PO and YUM-YUM prepared for journey). Here h 
comes. Here, Nanki-Poo, 1 've good news for you. You 're reprieved. 

NANK. Oh, hut it 's too late. I *m a dead man, and I 'in off for my 

Ko. Nonsense. A terrible thing has just happened. It seems 
you 're the son of the Mikado. 

NANK. Yes, but that happened some time ago. 

Ko. Is this a time for airy persiflage? Your father is here, and 
with Katisha! 

NANK. My father ! And with Katisha ! 

Ko. Yes, he wants you particularly. 

POOH. So does she. 

YUM. Oh, but he '8 married now. 

Ko. But, bless my heart what has that to do with it? 

NANK. Katisha claims me In marriage, but I can't marry her, 
because I *m married already ; consequently, she will insist on my 
execution, and If I'm executed, my wife will have to be burl** 1 

YUM. You see our difficulty. 

Ko. Yes, I dont know what 's to be done. 

NANK. There 's one chance for yon. If you could persuade Katisha 
to marry you she would have no further claim on me, and in that 
CMC I could come to life without any fear of being put to death. 

Ko. I marry Katisha ! 

YUM. I really think it 's the only course. 

Ko. But, my good girl, have yon seen herT She's something 
appalling ! 

Pirn. Ah, that 's only her face. She has a left elbow which people 
come miles to see ! 

POOH. I am told that her right heel Is much admired by con- 

Ko. My good sir, I decline to pin my heart upon any lady's right 


It comes to this : While Katisha Li single, I prefer to 
disembodied spirit. When Katimha is men-led, existence will to * 
welcome aa the flowers in spring. 


NANH-POO and Ko-Ko 

NAKK The flowers that bloom In the spring, 

tra la, 

Breathe promise of merry sunshine, 
As we merrily dance and sing, 

tra la, 
We welcome the hope that they bring, 

tra la, 

Of a summer of roses and wine ; 
And that 's what we mean when we say that a 
Is welcome as flowers that bloom in the spring. 
Tra la la la la la, etc. 

Aix. And that 's what we mean, etc. 

Ko The flowers that bloom in the spring, 

Tra la, 

Have nothing to do with the case. 
I 've got to take an tier my wing, 

Tra la, 
A most unattractive old thing, 

Tra la, 

With a caricature of a face ; 
And that's what I mean when 1 say, or I sing, 
" Oh, bother the flowers that bloom in the spring t * 

Tra la la la la la, etc, 

Au. And that's what he means when he ventures to sing, etc. 
(Dance an J exeunt NAinn-Poo, YuM-TuM, POOH-BAH, and Pm. 

SlNO ) 


Alone, and yet alive I Oh, sepulchre I 
My soul is still my body's prisoner I 
Remote tin peace that Death alone can glT, 
My doom, to wait 1 my punishment to live ' 


Hearts do not break ! 
They sting and ache 
For old sake's sake, 

Bat do not die ! 
Though with each breath 
They long for death, 

The living II 

Oh, living It 

Cone, tell BM why t 

When hope ia gone 
Dost thou stay OB? 
Why linger here, 
Where all Is drear i 
May not a cheated maiden die? 

Ko. (Approaching her timidly.) Katisha? 

KAT. The miscreant who robbed me of my lore I Bat 
parsaes ; they are heating the cauldron 1 

Ko. Katisha, behold a suppliant at your feet 1 Katisha, mercy ! 

KAT. Mercy ? Had you mercy on him ? See here, you I You bar* 
lain my love. He did not love me, but he would have loved me in time. 
I am an acquired taste, only the educated palate can appreciate me. 
I was educating his palate when he left me. Well, he is dead, and 
where shall I find another? It takes years to train a man to love me; 
am I to go through the weary round again, and at the same time im- 
plore mercy for you who robbed me of my prey I mean my pupil 
just as his education was on the point of completion? Oh, where shall 
I find another? 

Ko. (Suddenly and with great vehemence.) Here I Here 1 
KAT. What ! I ! 

Ko. (With intense passion.) Katisha, for years I have loved you 
with a white-hot passion, that is slowly but surely consuming my very 
vitals ! Ah, shrink not from me I If there is aught of woman's mercy 
in your heart, turn not away from a lovesick suppliant, whose every 
fibre thrills at your tiniest touch ! True it is, that, under a poor mask 
of disgust, I have endeavored to conceal a passion whose inner fires 
are broiling the soul within me. But the fire will not be smothered, 
it defies all attempts at extinction ; and, breaking forth all the more 
eagerly for its long restraint, it declares itself in words that will not 
oe weighed, that cannot be schooled, that should not be too severely 
criticised. Katisha, I dare not hope for your love, but I will not live 
without it ! 

KAT. You, whose hands still reek with the blood of my betrothed, 
dare to address words of passion to the woman yon have so foully 
wronged 1 

Ko. I do ; accept my love, or 1 perish on the spot. 

KAT. Go to 1 Who knows so well as I that no one ever yet die* at 
i broken heart ! 

Ko. You know not what you say. Listen I 

SONG. Ko-Ko. 

On a tree, by a river, a little tom-tlt 

Sang " Willow, titwillow, titwillow 1 " 
And I said to him, " Dicky-bird, why do yon lit 

Slnginf 'Willow, titwillow, titwillow'f 
" ! It weakness of Intellect, birdie?" I cried, 
Or a rather tough worm in your little inside t" 
with a shake of his poor little head, he replied, 
44 Oh willow, titwillow. titwillow I " 


Me flapped at hit chest, as he sat on that bough, 

Singing Willow, titwillow, titwillow I - 
And a cold perspiration bespangled his brow. 

Oh willow, titwillow, titwillowl 
He sobbed and he sighed, and a gurgle he gave, 
Then he threw himself into the billowy wave, 
And an echo arose from the suicide's grave 
" Oh willow, titwillow, titwillow !" 

Now I feel just as sure as I 'in sure that my name 

Is n't Willow, titwillow, titwillow, 
That 't was blighted affection that made him exclaim, 

Oh willow, titwillow, titwillow ! " 
And if you remain callous and obdurate, I 
Shall perish as he did, and you will know why, 
Though I probably shall not exclaim as I die, 
Oh willow, titwillow, titwillow ! " 

{ During tkit tong KATISHA has be^n greatly affected, and at tin end it 
almoxt in teart.) 

KAT. ( Whimpering. ) Did he really die of love? 

Ko. He really did. 

KAT. All on account of a cruel little hen? 

Ko. Yes. 

RAT. Poor little chap 1 

Ko. It's an affecting tale, and quite true. I knew the bird inti- 

KAT. Did you? He must have been very fond of her I 
Ko. His devotion was something extraordinary. 

KAT. (Still whimpering.) Poor little chap ! And and if I refus* 
you, will you go and do the same? 

Ko. At once. 

KAT. No*, no you musn'tl Anything but that I (Fallt on kit 
Breast.) Oh, I 'm a silly little goose ! 

Ko. (Making a wry face.) Yon are ! 

KAT. And you wo n't hate me because I 'm just a little tey . 
weeney wee bit bloodthirsty, will you ? 

Ko. Hate you? Oh, Katisha! is there not beauty even IB bloo* 

KAT. My Idea exactly. 


KAT. There is beauty in the bellow of the blast, 

There is grandeur in the growling of the gate, 
There is eloquent out-pouring 
When the lion is a- roaring, 
And the tiger is a-lashing of his tall > 


le Tea, I like to see a tiger 

From the Congo or the Niger, 
And especially when lashing of hi* tell I 

KAT. Volcanoes hare a splendor that is grim, 

And earthquakes only terrify the dotte ; 

Bat to him who 's scientific 

There 'a nothing that 's terrific 
IB the falling of a flight of thunderbolt*! 

Eo. Tea, in spite of all my meekneM, 

If I have a little weakness, 
It ' a passion for a flight of thunderbolt* I 

BOTH If that is so, 

Sing derry, down derry I 
It's evident, very, 

Our tastes are oae. 
Away we '11 go, 

And merrily marry, 
Nor tardily tarry, 
Till day is done ! 

Ko There Is beauty in extreme old age 

Do you fancy you are elderly enough t 
Information I 'm requesting 
On a subject interesting : 
Is a maiden all the better when she ' tough? 

KAT. Throughout this wide dominion 

It 's the general opinion 
That she '11 last a good deal longer when the ' 

Ko. Are you old enough to marry, do you think? 

Wont you wait till you are eighty in the hade? 
There's a fascination frantic 
In a ruin that's romantic ; 
Do you think you are sufficiently decayed ? 

CAT. To the matter that you mention 

I have given some attention, 
And 1 think I am sufficiently decayed. 

SOTS, If that is so, 

Sing deny, down derry I 
It's evident, very, 

Our tastes are one I 
Away we'll go, 
And merrily marry, 
Nor tardily tarry 
Till day Is done I [JBtemrt tef**** 

Enter the MIKADO, attended by PwH-TxrsH and Cowl 

Ma. Now, then, we've had a capital lunch, and we're quite 
Havtt all the painful preparations been made ? 


Pm. Tour Majesty, all Is prepared. 

inc. Then produce the unfortunate gentleman MM! hi* two well 
waning bat misguided accomplices. 

Enter Ko-Ko, KATUHA, POOH-BAH and Prrn-8iNO They throw them 
rlvf. at the MIK ADO'S feet. 

KAT. Mercy! Mercy for Ko-Ko t Mercy for Pitti-Sing! Mercy 
eren for Pooh-Bah t 

Mix. I beg your pardon, I don't think I quite caught that remark. 

KAT. Mercy I My husband, that was to have been, Is dead, and I 
have just married this miserable object. 

MIK. Oh I You're not been long about it t 
Ko. We were married before the Registrar 1 
POOH. 7 am the Registrar. 

MIK. I see. But my difficulty is that, as yon hare slain the Heir 

Enter NANX-POO and Tun-Tun. They kneel. 

NAKK. The Heir-Apparent is not slain. 

Mix. Bless my heart, my son ! 

YUM. And your daughter-in-law elected ! 

KAT. (Setting Ko-Ko.) Traitor, you hare deceived me I 

MIK. Tes, you are entitled to a little explanation, but I think he 
will give it better whole thau in pieces. 

Ko. Tour Majesty, it's like this. It is true that I stated that I hao 
killed Nanki-Poo 

Mix. Tes, with most affecting narUrmlars. 

POOH. Merely corroborative detail Intended to give vert-similitude 
to a bald and 

Ko. Will you refrain from putting in your oarl (To MIR.) It's 
like this : when your Majesty says, " Let a thing be done," it's as good 
as done, practically, it is done. **ecause your Majesty's will is law. 
Tour Majesty says, " Kill a gentleman," and a gentleman is told off to 
be killed. Consequently, that gentleman is as good as dead; practi- 
cally, he is dead, and if he is dead, why not say so? 

MIK. I see. Nothing could possibly be more satisfactory ! 


Pirn. For he's f one and he's nuurled Turn-Turn 

Turn-Turn ! 

Pirn. Tour anger pray bury, 

For all will be merry, 
I thik you had better succumb 

Cumb cul 

Pirn. And Join our expressions of (lee I 

&o. Oa this subject, I prmy you be dumb 

ALL Dutb dtatfei 

Ko Your notions, though many, 

Are not worth a penny, 
The word for your guidance IB " Mom " 

A_LI. Mara mam 

Ko. You've a rery good bargain in me, 

YUM and NAITK. The threatened cloud has passed away, 
And brightly shines the dawning day ; 
What though the sight may come too 
We're years and years of afternoon ' 

SJLL Then let the throng 

Oar joy advance, 
With laughing song 
And merry dance, 

With joyous shout and ringing m.tmi> 
our new career I 



Arr. by MACT 

Andante moderate. 

Hearts do not break ! They sting and ache For 

old love's sake, But do not die! Tho' with each breath Thej 

long for death, Ad wit-nesseth the living II the living I! 

Ob, liv - ing I ! 

Come, tell me why, when 

^^=f-\ : r"TU3f4gL m 


Coor.1hU 1W6 bT OUrr U1UOD * On 



hope is gone Dost thou stay on, Why lin - ger here Where 


all is dear? Oh, liv - ing I ! 

Come, tell me 

why, When hope is gone Dost thou stay on! May not a cheated maiden 

j jr i 

-* " o 

die ? May not a cheated maid-en die ? 


RMTta do not brMk. -i 


irr by MACT 


1. On a tree by a riv - er a lit - tie torn - tit Sang 




wil -low, tit-wil-low, tit -wil -low!" And 1 




said to him, "Dick- y - bird, why do yon sit Singing, 

P *. 

JJ '' 

Willow, tit - willow, tit - wil - low?" 

Is it 


weak - ness of in - tel-leet, bir - die I" I cried, "Or a 



J- JJu: 

rath - er tough worm in your lit - tie in - side ?" With a 

shake of his poor lit - tie head, he re - plied, "Oh 


-3 =1 * 1 1 



' g j ^ II 

wil-lo%, tit- wil-Unr, tit - wil -low!" 



-J .. J . 

^j 1 1 W 1 




The Musicians Library 

C.This notable series has been planned to embrace all the master- 
pieces of song and piano literature ; to gather into superbly made 
volumes of uniform size and binding the best work of the best com- 
posers, edited by men of authority. Each volume is independent, complete in itself, 
and sold by itself. 


BACH PIANO ALBUM. Vol. I. Shorter Compositions Dr. Ebenezer Prout 

BACH PIANO ALBUM. Vol. II. Larger Compositions Dr. Ebenezer Prout 


BRAHMS, JOHANNES. Selected Piano Compositions Raphael Joseffy 

CHOPIN, FREDERIC. Forty Piano Compositions James Huneker 

CHOPIN, FREDERIC. The Greater Chopin James Huneker 

GRIEG, EDVARD. Larger Piano Compositions Bertha Feiring Tapper 

GRIEG, EDVARD. Piano Lyrics and Shorter Compositions Bertha Feiring Tapper 

HAYDN, FRANZ JOSEF. Twenty Piano Compositions Xaver Scharwenka 

LISZT, FRANZ. Ten Hungarian Rhapsodies August Spanuth and John Orth 

' LISZT, FRANZ. Twenty Original Piano Compositions August Spanuth 

LISZT, FRANZ . Twenty Piano Transcriptions August Spanuth 

MENDELSSOHN, FELIX. Thirty Piano Compositions { -^^p^bSbrS^^I^SS^ 

MOZART, WOLFGANG AMADEUS. Twenty Piano Compositions Carl Remecke 

SCHUBERT, FRANZ. Selected Piano Compositions August Spanuth 

SCHUMANN, ROBERT. Fifty Piano Compositions Xaver Scharwenka 

WAGNER, RICHARD. Selections from the Music Dramas Otto Singer 

ANTHOLOGY OF FRENCH PIANO MUSIC. Vol. I. Early Composers ? , jd p ni > iD i 

Vol. II. Modern Composers 5 

ANTHOLOGY OF GERMAN PIANO PIANO MUSIC. Vol. I. Early Composers I Moritz Moszkowrski 

Vol. n. Modern Composers ) ' 


TWENTY-FOUR NEGRO MELODIES Transcribed for Piano by S. Coleridge-Taylor 

Each volume in heavy paper, cloth back, $1.50; in full cloth, gilt, $2.50. Copies mailed postpaid. 
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All librettos have Englisn text. Additional texts are indicated by Italic letters, as follows : 
/, Italian; G, German; F, French. Those marked with (*) contain no music and are 15 cents 
a copy. All the others have the music of the principal airs and are 25 cents each. 

A G 

Title Text 

Af ricaine, L' /. 

Aida /. 

*Amico Fritz, L' (Friend 

Fritz) 7. 

Armide F. 

Ballo in Maschera, Un 

(The Masked Ball) /. 
Barbe-Bleue (Blue 

Beard) F. 

Barbiere di Siviglia, II 

(Barber of Seville) /. 
Belle Helene, La F. 

Bells of Corneville 

(Chimes of Normandy) 
*Billee Taylor 
Bohemian Girl, The 

do. /. 

Carmen F. 

do. /. 

Cavalleria Rusticana /. 

Chimes of Normandy 

(Bells of Corneville) 
Cinderella /. 

Contes d'Hoffmann, Les 

(Tales of Hoffmann) F. 
Crispino e 'a Comare 

(The Cobbler and 

the Fairy) 7. 

Crown Diamonds, The F. 
Dame Blanche, La 
Damnation of Faust, The F. 
Dinorah 7. 

*Doctor of Alcantara, The 


Giacomo Meyerbeer 
Giuseppe Verdi 

Pietro Mascagni 
C. W. von Gluck 

Giuseppe Verdi 
Jacques Offenbach 

Gioacchino A. Rossini 
Jacques Offenbach 

Robert Planquette 

Edward Solomon 

Franz von Suppe" 

Michael Wm. Balfe 

Georges Bizet 

Pietro Mascagni 

Robert Planquelle 
Gioacchino A. Rossini 

Jacques Offenbach 

Luigi and F. Ricci 

D. F. E. Auber 

F. A. Boieldieu 

Hector Berlioz 

Giacomo Meyerbeer 
Julhis Eichberg 


Don Giovanni 
Don Pasquale 

Elisire d'amore, L' 
Etoile du Nord, L (The 

Star of the North) 


Favorita, La 

Figlia del Reggimento, 
La (Daughter of the 
Fille de Madame Angot, 

Flauto Magico, II (The 

Magic Flute) 
B iedermaus, Die (The 


Fleur de The 
Flying Dutchman, The 


Fra Diavolo 
Freischutz, Der 

*Gillette (La Belle 

Gioconda, La 
Gotterdammerung, Die 

Text Composer 

7. W. A. Mozart 

7. Gaetano Donizetti 
Alfred Ce liter 

7. Gaelano Donizetti 

I. Edward Jakobowski 

7. Gi^lseppe Verdi 

7. Giacomo Meyerbeer 
Franz von Steppe 

F. Charles Gounod 
7. do. 

I. Gaetano Donizetti 

G. L. van Beethoven 

7. Gaetano Donizetti 

F. Charles Lecocq 
7. W. A. Mozart 

G. Johann Strauss 

F. F. Herve (Ranger) 

Richard Wagner 

G. do. 

I. D.F.E. Auber 

G. Carl Maria von Weber 
L do. 

Edmond Audran 
I. Amilcare Ponchielli 

F. Charles Lecocq 

G. Richard Wagner 


Standard Opera Librettos 

All librettos have English text. Additional texts are indicated by Italic letters, as follows : 
/, Italian; G, German; F, French. Those marked with (*) contain no music and are 15 cents 
a copy. All the others have the music of the principal airs and are 25 cents each. 

G Z 


Text Composer 


Text Composer 

Grand Duchess of 


/. Giuseppe Verdi 

Gerolstein, The 

F. Jacques Offenbach 

Pagliacci, I 

I. K. Leoncavallo 


Ambroise Thomas 


G. Richard Wagner 

Jewess, The 

I. Jacques F. Hativy 

Pinafore (H.M.S.) 

Sir Ar/hur S. Sullivan 

Konigin von Saba 

Prophete, Le 

1. Giacomc Meyerbeer 

(Queen of Sheba) 

G. Karl Goldmark 

Puritani, I 

I. Vincenzo Bellini 


/. Le"o Delibes 

Rheingold, Das (The 

Lily of Killarney, The 

Sir Jules Benedict 


G. Richard Wagner 

Linda di Chamounix 

/. Gaetano Donizetti 


/. Giuseppe Verdi 

*Little Duke, The 

Charles Lecocq 

Robert le Diable 

1. Giacomo Meyerbeer 


G. Richard Wagner 

Romeo et Julietta 

F, Charles Gounod 


/. do. 

Romeo e Giulietta 

/. do. 

*Lovely Galatea, The 

Franz von Suppt 

Samson et Dalila 

F. Camille Saint-Saens 

Lucia di Lammermoor 

I. Gaetano Donizetti 


I Gioacchino A. Rossini 

Lucrezia Borgia 

/. do. 


G. Richard Wagner 

*Madame Favart 

Jacques Offenbach 

*Sleeping Queen, The 

Michael Wm. Balfe 


F. Jules Massenet 

Sonnambula, La 

1 Vincenzo Bellini 


Wm. Vincent Wallace 

* Sorcerer, The 

Sir Arthur S. Sullivan 

Marriage of Figaro 

/. W. A. Mozart 

*Spectre Knight, The 

Alfred Cellier 


I. Friedrich von Flotow 


Friedrich von Flotow 

*Mascot, The 

Edmond Audran 


G, Richard Wagner 

Meistersinger, Die 
(The Mastersingers) 

G. Richard Wagner 

Traviata, La 

1, Giuseppe Verdi 


/. Arrigo Boito 

Tristan und Isolde 

G. Richard Wagner 

Merry Wives of 

Trovatore, 11 

1 Giuseppe Verdi 

Windsor, The 

Otto Nicolai 

Ugonotti, Gli (The 


J. Ambroise Thomas 


J. Giacomo Meyerbeer 

1 Mikado, The 

Sir Arthur S. Sullivan 

Verkaufte Braut, Die 

1 *Musketeers, The 

Louis Varney 

(The Bartered Bride) 

G. Friedrich Smetana 

I *Nanon 

Richard Gende 

Walkure, Die 

G. Richard Wagner 

H Norma 

/. Vincenzo Bellini 

William Tell 

I. Gioacchino A. Rossini 

1 "-Olivette 

Edmond A udran 

Zauberflte, Die (The 


C. W. von Gluck 

Magic Flute) 

G. II' A. Mozart 



Songs from the Operas 


Bound in paper, cloth back, $1.50 each, postpaid 
In full cloth, gilt, . . . $2.50 each, postpaid 

In these volumes of THE MUSICIANS LIBRARY the editor has 
presented in chronological order the most famous arias from operas of 
every school. Beginning with songs from the earliest Italian productions, 
a comprehensive view of operatic development is given by well-chosen 
examples from German, French, and later Italian works, down to con- 
temporary musical drama. 

1 Each song or aria is given in its original key with the original text, and 
a faithful and singable English translation. 

Each volume contains an interesting preface by Mr. Krehbiel with 

historic, descriptive and interpretative notes on each song. 

, Portraits of the most noted composers represented are given in each 


C. Size of each volume, 9^ x I2>^ inches. 

Soprano Songs from the Operas 

Contains twenty-three numbers by nineteen composers. The music covers 188 
pages, the prefatory matter 25 pages. Portraits are given of Beethoven, Bellini, Gluck, 
Gounod, Meyerbeer, Mozart, Rossini, Verdi and Weber. 

Mezzo-Soprano Songs from the Operas 

Contains thirty numbers by twenty-five composers. The music covers 186 pages, 
the prefatory matter 29 pages. Portraits are given of Auber, Bizet, Donizetti, Handel, 
Massenet, Saint-Saens, Spontirii, Thomas and Wagner. 

Contains twenty-nine numbers by twenty-two composers. The music covers 176 
pages, the prefatory matter 20 pages. Portraits are given of Glinka, Gluck, Handel, 
Lully, Meyerbeer, Purcell, Rossini, Thomas and Verdi. 

Tenor Songs from the Operas 

Contains twenty-nine numbers by twenty-one composers. The music covers 192 
pages, the prefatory matter 27 pages. Portraits are given of Beethoven, Bizet, Gluck, 
Gounod, Mascagni, Massenet, Verdi, Wagner and Weber. 

Baritone and Bass Songs from the Operas 

Contains twenty-seven numbers by twenty-four composers. The music covers 
188 pages, the prefatory matter 20 pages. Portraits are given of Bellini, Bizet, Cheru- 
bini, Gounod, Halevy, Handel, Mozart, Ponchielli and Tchaikovsky. 

, Bizet, Cheru- E