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'BIT OF
ELEBWTIES.
OLIVER
HERFORD
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AN ALPHABET
OF CELEBRITIES
8
AN ALPHABET
OF CELEBRITIES
Oliver Hcrford
BOSTON
SMALL, MAYNARD & COMPANY
(899
COPYRIGHT 1899 BY
SMALL. MAYNARD & COMPANY
(INCORPORATED)
ENTERED AT STATIONERS' HALL
THE HEINTZEMANN PRESS
BOSTON U.S.A.
An Alphabet
of Celebrities
'S Albert Edward,
well meaning but
flighty,
Who invited King Arthur,
the blameless and
mighty,
To meet Alcibiades and
Aphrodite.
IS for Bernhardt,
who fails to
awaken
Much feeling in Bismarck,
i
Barabbas, and
Bacon*
IS Columbus, who
tries
to explain
How to balance an egg
to the utter disdain
Of Confucius, Carlyle,
Cleopatra, and Cain*
'S for Diogenes,
Darwin,
and Dante,
Who delight in the dance
Of a Darling
Bacchante.
IS for Edison,
making
believe
He's invented a clever
contrivance for Eve,
Who complained that she
never could laugh
in her sleeve*
IS for Franklin,
who fearfully
shocks
The feelings of Fenelon,
Faber, and Fox.
IS Godiva, whose
great bareback
feat
She kindly but firmly de
clines to repent,
Though Gounod and
Goldsmith implore
and entreat.
IS for Handel,
who pours
out his soul
Through the bagpipes to
Howells and Homer,
who rol
On the floor in an ecstasy
past all control*
IS for Ibsen,
While Irving and
Ingersoll
hasten away.
w
j?
s
IS for Johnson,
who only says
-Pish!"
To Jonah, who tells him
his tale
of a fish.
Some original verses to
Kipling and
Keats.
IS Lafontaine,
who finds he's
unable
To interest Luther and
Liszt in his fable,
While Loie continues
to dance on the table.
1
ft
IS Macduff,
who's prevailed
upon Milton
And Montaigne and
Manon to each try
kilt
on.
IS Napoleon,
shrouded
in gloom,
With Nero, Narcissus,
and Nordau, to whom
He's explaining the
manual of arms with
a broom.
V
B
IS for Oliver,
casting
aspersion
On Omar, that awfully
dissolute Persian,
Though secretly longing
to join the diversion.
IS for Peter , who
hollers
-No! No!"
Through the keyhole to
Paine, Paderewski,
and :*oe.
IS the Queen,
noble
and free
For further particulars look
under
a
B
'S Rubenstein,
playing that
old thing in F
To Rollo and Rembrandt,
who wish
they were deaf.
C
IS for Swinburne,
who, seeking the
true, the good, and
the beautiful, visits the Zoo,
Where he chances on Sap-
pho and Mr. Sardou,
And Socrates, all with the
same end in view.
a
1
IS
Miss
the side of her well,
in a glass of vermouth,
And presenting Mark
Twain as the friend
of his youth*
IS for Undine,
pursuing
Ulysses
And Umberto, who flee
her damp, death-
dealing kisses*
For further particulars look
under
ton, Wesley, and good Doctor
Watts. His prurient plots
pained Wesley and Watts,
But Washington said he
" enjoyed them in spots/
And frightening the
army of Xerxes
away*
IS for Young,
the great
Mormon saint,
Who thinks little Yum
Yum and Yvette so
quaint,
He has to be instantly
held in restraint.
presenting
To Zenobia the brave
and Zuleika the fair,
Whose blushes they
artfully conceal with
their hair.
This Alphabet of Celebrities
written & pictured by Oliver
Herf ord with a border & initial
letters by Bertram Grosvenor
Goodhue and end papers &
cover design by E, B* Bird is
printed for Small Maynard &
Company at the Heintzemann
Press in Boston U* S* A* in
the month of November
MDCCCXCIX
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