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Accession No. I *-)05^6} *V
Digitized by the Internet Archive
in 2009 with funding from
Lyrasis Members and Sloan Foundation
OF NINETEEN HUNDRED
AT HAVERFORD COLLEGE
HAVERFORD • PENNSYLVANIA
B- S, LOEWENSTEIN, Editor
P. B RICH ARDSON. Sujinci! Mandse'
n the hope that this
record book will crysta -
ize pictorially the common
interests of the past anc
future, we, the editors,
present this book . . .
Campus Views 10
Centenary Celebration 24
Other Classes 101
Junior Prom 116
Features 1 38
We dedicate this book
to the Alumni of the past
century with as deep
and genuine a sincerity
as they have dedicated
themselves to our College
RUFUS M. JONES
There are four major events in life: Get-
ting born, getting married, selecting the
right center of education and finding a
career that fits one's aptitudes.
I was born at the right spot and time,
married the right person, chose the ideal
college and have had a perfectly happy
career of forty-one years as a teacher
of Haverford men whom I have both
admired and loved.
DON C. BARRETT
LiFe at Haverford is full of interest and
helpfulness and enjoyment. One feels a
sense of deep regret in separating him-
self from its active duties, yet he wishes
to retire with as much grace and con-
tentment as lies within him so to do.
Fortunately, retirement does not mean
inactivity — only opportunity to pursue
many interests crowded out hitherto.
LEGH W. REID
Having been asked to write a few words for tfiis
Record on the eve of my retirement after thirty-four
years' service as a member of tfie Faculty of
Haverford College, I am glad to do so.
The recollection that I have known and taught
every man who entered Haverford as a Freshman
for thirty years will always be a great satisfaction
to me, and I only regret that it has been possible
for me to know and teach only a portion of the
students now in college. The memories of these
associations will always be precious to me, and I
can soy truthfully that among my happiest hours
hove been those passed in my classroom.
May I hope that all of you, alumni and students,
whom I have known, con say "Forsan el /laec olim
••}-. « '•
■■■^- -.* f V
i<^^H ''^^H *^?^H
WILLIAM WISTAR COMFORT, President
Haverlord College, AB,, A.M., and Ph D , Harvard Universily,
University o( Pennsylvaniai LL.D., Universily of Maryland and
Lake Forest College
LYMAN BEECHER HALL
A.B., Amherst College, A.M. and Ph D., University of Gottingen
John Fainum Professor of Cfomistry, Emeritus
ALBERT SIDNEY BOLLES
Ph D., Middlebury College, LL D., Lafayette College
Lecturer In Commerciol Law and Banking, Emeritus
HENRY SHERRING PRAH
A B , University of Michigon; A.M. and Ph D., University of Leipzig
David Scull Professor of Biology, Emeritus
JAMES ADDISON BABBIH
A.B., Yale University^ A.M., Haverford College/
M.D , University of Pennsylvania
Professor of Hygiene and Physical Education, fmeritui
RUFUS MATTHEW JONES
AB. and A.M., Haverford College;
A.M. and D.D., Harvard Universityj Litt.D.,
Penn College, LL.D , Haverford College,
Swarthmore College, and Eorlhom Col-
lege; D. Theol., Universily of Marburg
Professor of Philosophy
LEGH WILBER REID
SB., Virginia Military Institute, A.B.,
Johns Hopkins University; S M., Princeton
University; Ph.D., Universily of Gbtlingen
Professor of Molhemalics
DON CARLOS BARRETT
A B. and A.M., Earlham College; A.M.
and Ph.D., Harvard University
Professor of Economics
WILLIAM EDWARD LUNT
A.B. and LH.D, Bowdoin College;
AM. ond Ph.D , Horvord University
Wallet D. ond Edilh M. L. Scull Ptofenor
of Engliih Conillturionol History
FREDERIC PALMER, JR.
A.B., AM,, and Ph.D., Harvard Univeriily
Profmor ol Phyilci
B., AM, PhD., and STB., Boston
Proleiior of Biblical Llleralur*
Absent on leave, second half
FRANK DEKKER WATSON
SB. in Economics and Ph.D ,
University of Pennsylvania
Profefior of Sociology
and Social Work
RAYNER WICKERSHAM KELSEY
Ph.B., Earlham College, M.L. and Ph.D.,
University of Colifornia
Professor of History
LEON HAWLEY RITTENHOUSE
M.E., Stevens Institute of Technology
Professor of Ensineerlng
DEAN PUTNAM LOCKWOOD
A.B., A M., ond Ph.D.,
Professor of Latin
3 n a
■"^ H l
. . I
"And two morihats ihall ctear the woy"
Every one agreed that Centenary Day was a glorious success. Its campus crowded with
worthy old grads and their families and educational leaders From all America, Haverford
forgot its famed modesty and retirement for at least twenty-four hours. Polite under-
graduates, all wearing neckties, and in nearly all cases coats to match their pants, were
seen everywhere, like plain clothes men, shadowing their eminent elders. The sun
shone graciously all day long, and the belfry of Founders carried on the good work
with a battery of spotlights at night. We realized, that day, that hiaverford is more
than a place where we happen to spend four years of our lives.
"Leaving thoie who were to
remain at the Institution
to their own reflections"
"Now, where did thee
get Ihy Ph.D.?"
Und*r th* Big Top
And thou, O Time, though strong
Yet never, never sholt thou port
The ties that ever bind the heorts
Of every son of Haverford.
Save my child
"Can you led me where?"
^ ^'^BK^. '''
FIRST HALF SECOND HALF
RICHARD R. PLEASANTS .... President PHILIP B.RICHARDSON
JAMES D. LOCKARD Vice-President .... CHARLES M. BANCROFT
GERARD HOLZRICHTER .... Secretary JAMES H. COWAN
JAMES A. MACCOLL Treasurer GERARD HOLZRICHTER
JOHN MONSARRAT . .
CHARLES M. BANCROFT.
ROBERT H. BEAVEN . . .
ROBERT B. JONES . . . .
. . . President .... RICHARD R. PLEASANTS
. . . Vice-President ROBERT H. BEAVEN
. . . Secretary ... LOUIS W. FLACCUS, JR.
. . . Treasurer HENRY G. RUSSELL
PERMANENT CLASS OFFICERS . . . Atmoi* ar*oiurw), RIehl* (Vlcc-Pratldtnl), Flaeegt (Pietident), Plaaranli (SKitlarv)
ROBERT C. ATMORE . .
WILLIAM H. HAINES, III
ROBERT H. BEAVEN . .
LOUIS W. FLACCUS, JR.
President RICHARD O'B. GIBBS
. Vice-President ARTHUR T. RICHIE
. Secretary EDWIN P. TRIPP, JR.
. Treasurer .... LOUIS W. FLACCUS, JR.
FIRST HALF SECOND HALF
LOUIS W. FLACCUS, JR President .... LOUIS W. FLACCUS, JR.
ARTHUR T. RICHIE Vice-President ARTHUR T. RICHIE
ROBERT B. JONES Secretary .... RICHARD R. PLEASANTS
NORMAN J.RUSH Treasurer ROBERT C. ATMORE
ROBERT CRAIG ATMORE
314 LOUELLA AVENUE WAYNE PA.
Born 1912, Enlerod (rom William Penn Charter School in 1930.
Class President (3); Permanent Class Treasurer; CIoss Execu-
tive Committee (3, 4); Freshman-Junior Dance Committee;
Soph-Senior Dance Committee; Class Day Committee; Student
Council (4); News Board (3, 4); Glee Club (1, 2, 3, 4); Cap
and Bells (2, 3, 4), Vice-President (4); Founders Club (4).
To my d-d-darling S--5-sue:
Ever since y-y-you have spurned me for that
f-f-f-fillhy Princeton man I have b-b-been unable
to s-s-sleep or to e-e-eat, . . . w-w-well, anyway,
I haven't slept. You are u-u-unaware of my - my -
my possibilities and just because I do not look like
C-c-c-clark Gab— b— ble you scorn me.
Did it ever o-o-occur to you that I am the
b-b-biggest man on my c-c-compus? It Is possible
for m-m-me to sit any place in a theatre and s-s-see
without the slightest trouble . . . and I c-c-could
hold you in my l-l-lop with e-e-e-ease.
I have b-b-been actively connected with the
G-Glee Club ever since I have been in c-c-college.
I probably know more about M-m-music than Bach,
but not as much as H-H-hHunt Bach J-Jones, my
friend here. I a-a-adore Bridge in all forms but
S-S-Spin-the-Plate is what I am b-b-best at. I like
horseback rrrriding and have spent some ssssum-
mers at D-D-Dude Ranches although now I am
interested in a B-Boys' Camp.
I might not bbbbe as intel-tel-tellgent as that
guy from P-P-Princeton but then, it is an admitted
fact that 1 ttttake snap courses such as MMMUsIc
2; German something-or-other and L-L-Logic. I
have deliberately sssshunned all hard courses but,
hhhheck, it doesn't ttttake hard c-c-courses to make
mince-meat, which is where I will end up when I
I am a g-g-god-send to women for I can dan-
dan-dance great and think Shubert's Works are
just ggggreat but DO N-N-NOT compare with
Gilbert and Sullivan at all!! The lost g-g-girl I
had thought G & S were l-l-lousy and that is why
I want to go w-with you . . . S-S-Sue. You dont
mind if I call y-y-you SSSSSSue, d-d-do yyyou????
I am nnnot much of an aaathlete although I do
hove athlete's feet and can j-j-jump at ccconclu-
sions. I l-l-love to do Indian DDDDances when
everybody is in bbbed and go Whoooooo -
Whooooo and jijump up and dddown.
I am interested in Animal LLiiife and while at
College have been taking care of a C-C-Crow's
NNNNest. I am interested in BBBBr/n Mawr
College and voted fffor Hoover. PPPPIease write
P.S. I wear Size 14 ssshoes.
Stenographic report of telephone conversation
between the president of Notre Dame and a well-
known track coach. Lent to the Record by Bell
President: What do you know about Charles
Bancroft? Well-Knowr] Trsck Coach: You mean
Charles . . . Charles . . . you mean Charles Ban-
croft? Pres.: Yes, I mean Charles Bancroft; we
wont a new football coach because Layden just
resigned. W-K.T.C: Oh, that's loo bad. That's
too bad. Charles is a funny fellow . . . a fun . . .
fun . . . funny . . . Bancroft's a funny fellow. He
sleeps the dorndest hours . . . Sometimes he sleeps
through sup . . . sup . . . sometimes he sleeps
through dinner . . . The other day I went to see
him to ask him why he didn't go out for track that
afternoon ... to ask him v^hy he didn't go out
for track that afternoon. And he says "Pop" . . .
he soys "No kiddin'. Pop, I was goin' out, but I
fell asleep." Charley's a funny fellow, what do
you want to know about him? Pres.: Is he on
athlete? W-K.T.C: He and I coached a football
elev . . . elev . . . eleven . . . Charley and I
coached a football team last year. As fast as I
took men out, he put them bock. Charley's a funny
fell. . . Bancroft's a funny boy. He doesn't smoke
cig . . .cigar. . . cig . . . Charley doesn't smoke;
he only chews the ends of 'em. (Laughter from
W-KT.C). Pres.: How good on athlete Is he?
That's what I asked you. W-K.T.C: Well, well,
Charley's won the hard luck prize for othlel . . .
for athletics. He works terribly hard and he's
good . . . he's good . . . but he never seems to
get to the t . . . t . . . to a letter. Pres.: How are
his personal habits? W-K.T.C: Ban . . . Bon . . .
Well, Charley never seems to get very good marks
in French. Dear, dear, I shouldn't have said that.
You'd better ask somebody else all these ques-
tions. Pres.: That's all right, but could you get
Mr. Bancroft to the 'phone, please. W-K.T.C:
Why this is only a week after vocation, and
Charley nev . . . nev . . . seldom gets back to
college that soon. He's at his girl's house, he's
over at Anne Murphy's. Pres.: What was the
girl's lost name? W-K.T.C: Murph . . . Murph
. . . why, it's Murphy, Murphy like in potato.
Pres.: Are you sure it's Murphy? W-K.T.C: Posi-
tiv . . . posi . . . Why sure it's Murphy. Prej..'Tel!
Charley he has the job once held by the great
CHARLES MARCH BANCROFT
562 MOHAWK AVENUE
NORWOOD, DELAWARE COUNTY, PA.
Born 1911. Entered from Brown Preparatory School in 1930.
Class Vice-President (1, 2), Football, Numerals (1, 2, 3);
Track, Numerals (1, 3), H (2, 4), Captain (4), Hjverlotdiin
Board (3, 4); Record Board (4),- Triangle.
ROBERT HADDON BEAVEN
1 122 SOUTH GOODMAN STREET ROCHESTER, N. Y.
Born 1913. Entered from Peddle Preparatory School in 1930.
Class Secretary (2, 3); Class Vice-President (2); Permanent
Class Executive Committee; Chairman Soph-Senior Dance Com-
miltee; Junior Prom Committee; Football Dance Committee (4);
Class Day Committee, Chairman, Freshman Tennis Team; Glee
Club (1); Band (1); Instrumental Club (1, 2, 4); Cap and Bells
(1, 2, 3, 4); Record Board (4).
Dear Alumni Editor
I found the following clipping in the American
Mercury under the heading "American," a column
devoted to revealing the weaknesses and foibles
of the American body politic.
Religion up to the minute and very vital as por-
trayed by the Rochester (New York) Post-Scimitar;
Last week a new minister, Dr. Robert Beaven,
burst into town, and he has since stirred the town's
spiritual forces to their depths. The new divine,
a disciple of Rufus Jones and a follower of the
Inner Light, preached his virgin sermon on the
topic of "CornettingyourWay to Heaven," accom-
panying his remarks by appropriate snatches of
lively tunes on his own cornet.
A Post-Scimitar reporter asked Dr. Beaven what
his sermon next Sunday would be about. A great
punner and man of humour, he pulled the old one,
"Oh, about twenty-five minutes." "But seriously,"
he added, "1 have prepared a sermon on the
subject of 'Getting to Heaven by Making Funny
Faces.' This will be accompanied by extremely
uproarious grimaces which I have spent long years
in mastering. Then, the following Sunday, 1 intend
to dish it out (the same old stuff, of course), under
the title 'Getting to Heaven by Funny Noises,'
which, you may rest assured, will be a howl.
Other subjects which should also fill the house are:
'Dancing My Way to Heaven,' 'Sunday School
Teaching My Way to Heaven,' Getting to Heaven
on 'Very Little Food, Even as Do the Birds of the
Air,' 'Philosophizing My Way to Heaven via Rapt
Attention to Haverford's Man from Maine and
His Ethics Course.' In that sermon I will give
visual illustrations of how a man may integrate
himself although made up of two conflicting char-
acteristics, as I am, being very serious and at the
same time very frivolous." The reporter asked
Dr. Beaven if he believed in Heaven. The minister
replied, "Yes, if you define it in certain terms,"
and went on to a dissertation concerning Logic
with which we won't bother the reader.
I just had to write and tell you to take good care
of yourself on account of the track meet tomorrow,
and get to bed early. Of course, you always do
get to bed right after your nightly trip to Doc's,
unless you're out with me — at least your room-
mates say so — and the Lord only knows when you
get in. I'm sorry I've made you miss the last train
We were driving Hoverford way and I stopped
in lo see you yesterday, but you were at track
practice. How neat your room is — such a methodi-
cal person I never did see! No wonder they call
you Uncle Podger! One of the boys said that you
usually remake your bed after Lou is finished
because he doesn't do it just righf. My, Oh My.
But you're not an old maid, even if some people
do think so. I felt a little that way until last year
when you suddenly appeared in brown end white
sport shoes, instead of those everlasting brown
ones. It was quite encouraging. Now please
don't blow up at what I've said. You've got a
quick temper, but I will say, you cool down quickly
and are good-humored and playful again.
Dearest, I do want to thank you again for the
Orchestra the other night. It was wonderful,
especially the Wagner we both love so well. Do
you remember last summer at the Dell? I'm awfully
lucky to have a boy friend who loves good music,
but I still think it's a pity you don't dance.
Now remember, Harold, early to bed, and win
that race tomorrow. I'll be rooting for you. If
you had a milk-shake instead of breakfast this
morning, you'd belter omit the afternoon one and
just get your evening one at Doc's. Don't study
too hard — I know that's one of your failings —
and if you win, I'll take you to see Janet Goynor
HAROLD FORT BODINE
6723 EMLEN STREET PHILADELPHIA, PA.
Born 1912. Entered from Germantown Friends School in 1930.
Track, Freshman Team, H (2, 3, 4); Cross-Counlry Squad
(3, 4), H (4), Captain (4).
Your own, Susie
LEWIS HOWARD BOWEN
Born 1910. Entered from Georae School in 1930.
Student Council (4), Monager Cooperative Store (4)/ News
Service (4); News Board (1. 2, 3, 4), News— Make-up Editor
(1)i News Editor (2)) Monaging Editor (3); Editor (4); Record
Board; English Club (4), Liberal Club (2, 3, 4).
Mr. Arthur Brisbane
New York City
Dear Mr. Brisbane:
I cm the editor o( the Haver(ord News, and I
have news for you. I cm going to graduate. It is
practically a sure thing. In spite of the very fine
advantages of this college, my term is drawing
toward a close, and it looks as if^'m going to
get an honorable discharge.
You are getting old, Mr. Brisbane. You can't
keep that stuff up forever. Longfellow died even-
tually. So did Wordsworth. Edgar Guest will, too.
They're all the same, and you're no exception, no
matter which way you put it.
My point is this. In view of the hold you have
put on the public with your platitude pounding,
no one should gainsay the existential aspect of
your column, or deny that you have figured out a
way to sell the same old product with no change
in price. But this country is changing, Mr. Brisbane.
The American Public isn't so dumb as you think.
I've got a product that can match it. I think
I con confidently say that given enough office
room, time, salary, and cigarettes, I'll be able to
dictate stuff that will make your head swim, though
to be sure, you wouldn't duck if you got caught
in it. What do you think I worked on the H^verlord
News for? Nothing?
But before you mail me any papers to fill out,
I want a few things put straight. All transactions
are to be carried on in office hours and right in
the Tribune Building. Nobody's going to know
where I live or what I do in my spare time. If I
like to do Settlement work now and then, or read
Browning to my girl as we sit on the banks of a
woodland stream, or go watch 'em do it at the
Burlesque, well — that's my own business. And
by "It," at the Burlesque, I don't mean "read
I'd like a reply at once. And by the way, could
you let me have a five? My room-mates cleaned
me out again last night.
Director of Record Office
This introduces my fairest-haired boy, Thomas
Shipley Brown, a prophet with honor even in his
own hamlet, the inspiring educational center of
Westtown, Pa. I have great faith in Tom's making
some brilliant discoveries in your office since he
made a marvelous find here, which was, that if a
student laughs at all of his professor's jokes, he is
bound to make perfectly swell marks.
One thing which leads me to think he will be a
success as a bookworm is the remarkable rapidity
with which he turns out term papers of an extreme
degree of erudition. On the same day that I
announce a choice of topics, he hands me a
finished essay of some 25,000 words. He intends
to teach English somewhere, but his genius would
only be wasted in such an arid occupation (you're
asking me?). I suggested that he tackle the
problem of what was, say, the influence of Petrarch
on the third assistant printer's devil in Heminge
and Condell's printing establishment. The result
of such a study performed in Brown's painstaking
manner would be an addition of indubitable value
to the world's present knowledge of Shakespeare.
Besides that, the boy is no slouch at cricket. Who
on earth wants to play that game, I don't know,
nor care much, but Brown plays it. And, in
England, it pays big dividends to be able to
cavort occasionally on the crease, eh what?
An important aspect about my progeny is his
Ouaker make-up which shows clearly in his face,
his robustness, and above all in his swearing
which, while manly, is nevertheless the refined
cursing of a gentleman who has glimpses of the
Please oblige by permitting this young man (who
also plays soccer, and instructs little tots in athletics
at a nearby Ouaker grade school, if you care to
know) to browse through your mass of . . . mate-
rial. I am sure he will turn up something worth-
while or grow gray-haired and impotent in the
J. Beslie Batson
THOMAS SHIPLEY BROWN
Born 1912. Entered from Wesllown School in 1930.
Cap and Gown CommiHee, Chairman; Soccer, Junior Varirty
(1), Numerals (2), H (3, 4), Cricket, H (2, 3, 4), Captain-
Mnnager (4); Corporation Scholarship (4), Poetry Prize (3),
Associate Editor Record, Secretary English Club (ht).
FRITZ K. DOWNEY
5717 ROCKHILL ROAD KANSAS CITY, MO.
Born 1913. Entered (ram Pembrake School in 1930.
Corporation Scholorship (2, 3, 4); Phi Beta Kappa (3, 4).
You call me a fool for taking Greek. You said
the some when I started Hebrew (and in that
specific case I agree. Of all the confounded
languages, Hebrew is the worst.) I'll not answer
you by tabulating the values of the classics.
Instead I'll explain why / did it. Your philosophy
of life and mine ore different. Yours is based on
religion and on the ethics ladled out by our
reverend Gunga Din to poor damned souls burn-
ing in the hell of insensibility. I have cut that
Gordian knot and my philosophy is based on
vanity. It pleased my vanity to take Hebrew and
now Greek. Everything that I have done since
my attainment to the age of reason has been done
in accordance with this standard. To please
myself is my highest aim.
Don't mistake me. I am no misanthrope. Com-
mon sense dictates that I conform in many respects
to the usage of the times. I find it very pleasant
to be friendly and agreeable to others and I
hope my attempts have been successful and have
lit the fires of friendship in the hearts of others.
To my fellows I must appear as one who is fond
of company, who studies for the sheer joy of
intellectual effort, who does things quietly and
cheerfully, who lends a helping hand to those
less gifted. Indeed they might equate the word
"altruistic" with my name. These things I have
done for mine own pleasure.
I know not whether in my heart I actually believe
this doctrine, or whether I believe it only when
defending it in argument, but this I do know:
my life thus far has followed a pattern whose
principle is hedonistic.
Mr. H. J. Nichol
The Lick Observatory
Jeez it's been a long time since I've had a letter
from you. What the hell's the matter over there
in England? Are you working on another of those
vile, uncompromisingly degrading, half cocked,
superficial mathematics books? My God, it's been
twenty years now since the days when I could
drag you back to any kind of normal, untrammelled,
existence at hiaverford by making you brew me a
cup of tea and listen to my reasons for thinking
that Nothing Matters. Bah! Pooh! There ain't
I don't know why the hell I've been working
at English literature all my life. It's a disease with
me. Can't quit it. One of the most ponderously
pretentious, enervating, diabolically stultifying
works I've had to read for YEARS was one I just
finished this morning — E. K. Chambers' new work on
Shakespeare. It's called What We Perhaps Know
About The Man Shakespeare. God! It's in seven
huge volumes and I've taken ASSIDUOUS notes
on the whole thing. It'll go into my thesis, but
I'm not iust sure where. My thesis is going to be
on Chaucer, but I figured I could use a lot of this
blasted scholarship iust as well.
Classes are terrible. Some of the professors that
are highly spoken of here are so fundamentally
and egregiously STUPID that they don't know
which is third base. But I should worry. I've got
my ov/n classes to worry about, and I've got them
oil sewed up. I make my students write a thousand
word theme for each class and correct each other's.
This gives me more time to work on my thesis. You
can say what you bloody please about duty to
undergraduates, but I have found that the numb-
skulls aren't worth it. Let 'em talk. I used to
myself. They'll find out when they start teaching
Got another offer from the Atlantic Monthly
to do an article on Shakespeare. I hate it, but
I think I'll do it.
JOHN LAFONTAINE DUSSEAU
EAST LANSDOWNE, PA.
Bom 1913. Entered from luinsdowne High School in 1930.
Classical Club (1, 2), Debolino (1, 2, 3).
OLIVER FLETCHER EGLESTON
922 CHURCH STREET INDIANA, PA.
Bom 1912. Entered (ran Schenley High School in 1929.
Hiverfordidn Board (3, 4)/ Editor (4); Record Board (3, 4))
Associate Editor (4).
New Yorker Publishing Co.
New York, N. Y.
I hereby make application for Thurber's job
on your magazine. You might say that that's on
extraordinary request. Well, I am an extraordinary
man. I have brilliant ideas/ in fact, I think they are
swell. Here's what I can do —
(1) Ploy the banjo — and sing a lot of long
and scrimy songs, all of which will enliven your
already rather ribald editorial sanctum. (Thai
reminds me — here's one I will let you use for
nothing. "An editor gave me fifty thousand dol-
lars for an essay on 'Cigarettes'. I generally write
on cigarettes, so I sanctum and took the fifty
(2) Keep a diary. Out of this I get a lot of
ideas and approximately twenty-five approximately
humorous essays a year. When I don't write about
cigarettes, I write about my diary.
(3) Collect books. This is really my passion,
picking up books of all sorts and descriptions.
My prize is one that ten cents bought from Leary's,
a copy of "Ala Baba and The Forty Thieves"
given to Uncle Bill when that estimable gentleman
was a mere child prodigy.
(4) Think up all sorts of systems. Say, you should
see my desk. All I hove to do is think of an object,
put my finger where it ought to be — and then
look for hours until I find the darned thing.
(5) Write in Old English. If you ever think of
putting out a whole issue written in Chaucerian
language, I'll do it for you, given a couple of
rye highballs and being allowed to stay up all
Well, look for me on June 10, for, Good old
Father Knickerbocker bless you and keep you,
I need a job. Get rid of Thurber by that time,
for when the Gods arrive, you know, the half-
gods must scram.
O. F. E.
This is an excerpt from the pages oF Samuel
Pepys' diary in his seventh reincarnation:
14lh. Walking through Whitehall I heard the
Duke of Wistar was gone to watch the Tennis,
so I down to the New Tennis Court, and saw
Sir Louis Flaccus play against my Lord of Hogenauer
for the Virginia Cup. My Lord beat three, and
lost two sets, they both, and he particularly
playing well, I thought. Sir Louis, is very popular
among his fellows and is Permanent Class President
and Captain of the Tennis and basketball teams.
15th. Comes our company to dinner/ my Lord
Wistar, Sir L. Read, Lord Gene and Sir Louis, my
wife and daughter. At nine to sup and then to
cards, and last of all to have a flagon of ale and
apples, drunk out of class mugs, which made all
merry/ and they full of admiration for the presenta-
tion of the cup to Lord Gene. Sir Louis bore his
Must see to it that he meets my niece for do
feel they would come off splendidly, hie is slim
and very graceful/ dances well, but in large
company is shy and reserved unless the talk turns
to Tennis. Learned from an intimate that Sir
Louis is being pushed for an Ambassadorship to
Germany, hlis command of the language is un-
common. Was greatly astonished to find his bridge
so good, shows much practice and knowledge
of the rules, hie bid and made grand slam
with poor cards well played. Sir P. Richards has
failed to corrupt him, though certain low beings
attempted to slander Sir L. by telling me that he
strayed late at night and other frivolities to which
I turned deaf ears. But after the company left me
again, my wife nagging at me, begs for a new
car. So, away to bed in a great huff, and feeling
martyred but both agreed on Sir L. for our niece
LOUIS WILLIAM FLACCUS, JR.
109 BRYN MAWR AVENUE
Born 1913. Entered from Wesltown School in 1930.
Closs Secretary (2); Class Treasurer (3); Class President
(4), Permanent Class President; Executive Aftiletic Committee
(4); Soccer, Numerals (1, 2)/ Basketball, Numerals (1), H
(2, 3, 4), Captain (4), Tennis, Numerals (1), H (2, 3, 4);
Captain (4); Founders Club (4).
librup ot AobfTforb Collritt
. (..-.-* .1.^,^^ [
III! II I I m mill I
page torty. seven
GRANT VAN LEER FRAZER
7102 HILLTOP ROAD BYWOOD. PA.
Born 1913. Entered from Upper Darby High School in 1930
The Lurid Library Association
New York City
For a long time you have been sending me
advertisements of books. It isn't entirely that I
am getting sick of them; they do bore me, and
I do throw them into the library waste-basket
here, but they also have made me think of o way
for you and me to make some money.
Have you ever really sat down and thought
about your advertising methods? If you have,
I'm ashamed of you. It is no wonder that the
overage sex book company can't make as much
money as it ought to. You pound away in the
same old style. A while ago I had the oppor-
tunity to sell an inexpensive pants presser. By
sheer mellifluous verbal chicanery I managed to
knock off a goodly number of sales.
I don't preen myself when I say I'm fairly
familiar with the book racket. I've been working
in this library, watching the habits of students and
librarians, for years. I know pretty well the
subtle relationship between book and peruser.
Let me give you a few suggestions: Instead of
saying "Aphrodite, complete and unexpurgoted,
with twenty-five full page drawings by Wm.
Le Nude. Limited edition. Order at once," why
don't you take a more conservative spirit and say,
"Aphrodite/ be sure to mark down her accession
number before you go." All you sex hawkers
sweat away to make yourselves glamorous. What
you need to do is to moke your prospects imagine
that the book is already theirs. Say "three cents
fine is charged for all books overdue," and your
customers will realize at once that there is no
time to waste.
I've studied philosophy here at Haverford and
I know a thing or two about human nature.
'T ain't all honey, t ain't all jam. There's con-
servatism in it. I'm conservative myself. I don't
shout or scream or refuse to eat my supper. I
take life as it comes, and earmark the seasons
and ears that seem to sound a note of profundity.
Remember what 1 say and quit your blatancy.
Attain calm, even as 1 have done.
Special to Business Manager:
re: Jack Morton Fultz, 2nd
Following orders from the main office, I wish
to report that a special investigation at the Col-
lege attended by the above mentioned applicant
for Pilot with American Airways brings a most
Fultz is a tall, well-liked fellow greatly inter-
ested in airplanes and fully qualified for accep-
tance. He is not athletic and restricted his college
activities chiefly to the Glee Club, an organization
of which he was a very capable and very active
member. Fultz was interested in [i\s studies and
obtained above-average grades without being
a severe student. Engineering was his Major
subject and it is interesting to note that he was
farsighted enough to enroll in Astronomy, a
knowledge of which subject will greatly increase
his value to the American Airways.
f-le is a direct descendent of one of the signers
of The Declaration of Independence although he
does not make very much ado about the fact. At
college he always arose on time and never was
addicted to night life until his Senior year. His
previous years had seen him living in Barclay
Hall but when he moved to Lloyd Hall, for his
last year, he took up quarters with two men named
Haines and Bancroft. Suddenly, for no apparent
reason, he began to stay out nights and was even
frequently seen holding a lighted cigarette in
his lips. In spite of these handicaps, he plugged
on and maintained his usual high ideals and
The report is to the effect that Fultz was of
varying degrees of success as far as his private
love lives were concerned. He keeps all his
friends, and the girls, too, wondering just what
the outcome will be. A most notorious affair was
held with a Mile. A-L. from Br/n Mawr who is
reported to have caused him much loss of sleep
during the early years at College. However,
Sulphur and Molasses plus the intervention of a
smoothie from the class above, dispelled the
illusion and Fultz began his spasmodic wanderings
for fairer game.
Agent 198 advocates acceptance of Fultz.
JOHN MORTON FULTZ, 2ND
44 SOUTH WYOMING AVENUE ARDMORE, PA.
Born 1913. Entered from Episcopal Academy in 1930.
Senior Prom Commiriee; Glee Club (2, 3, 4), Cap and Bells
(3, 4), Enoineerino Club (1, 2, 3, 4).
RICHARD O'BRIEN GIBBS
497 LARCH AVENUE BOGOTA, N. J.
Born 1911. Entered from Bogota High School in 1929.
Class President (3)j Class Executive Committee (4)j Student
Council (4); President (4), Football, Numerals (3), H (4),
Tennis, Junior Varsity (3), H (4); News Board (2); Business
Manager of Musical Clubs (4); Cop and Bells (4)/ Founders
Club (3, 4), Secretary (4); Triangle.
Bogota, N. J.
Dear Snail Fingers:
Listen, crocodile, I've had enough of your lip.
When ya goin' to quit tryin' to play bass viol
with a fiddle bow? You rat. I told ya once
who was goin' to run Bogota, and if I hear any
more of this stuff about poyin' hush money to the
dicks, I'll give Lead Pants the word and he'll put
the finger on ya. GET ME?
I suppose ya think the citizens of Bogota have
enough guts to object to my conscription of school
children into machine gun practice. Where the
hell do you think I am goin' to get guys to run
my show? — breed 'em from a flamingo? Or /
suppose you think because I had to bump off the
Spider that the W. C. T. U.'s going to fan me
with a necktie. You must be avi'ful dumb. Snail
Fingers. Why when I went to Haverford, there
wasn't a mug on the campus that didn't know
where to pay his fines, OR ELSE. The sheep in
Founders hardly dared come out of their boxes
when I ran that joint. Heh heh. When I think
how those chicken-livered baboons tried to break
up my manager system on the musical clubs.
Heh heh. Why I had everybody that ever tied
a boiled shirt on his chest pay me a rake-off
without ever knowin' it. And as for the dances,
they was all graft. How do you suppose I man-
aged to live in the only Penthouse on the Campus?
I knew enough dope about all the librarians
and stenogs to put any professor on the spot, and
I had 'em all payin' me hush money. YOU! Why
I'll tear ya LIMB FROM LIMB if I hear any more
fair/ stories about who's king of Bogota.
Now get this. Tell Lefty to call up the Editor
of the Bogota Bugle and make him run a serial
story of my life as one of Bogota's leading citizens.
I got to cover up after that orphan and widow
deal. Then arrange a free picnic for all the kids
in the city. Gel Horse Mouth to stick up a few
filling stations to pay for some balloons and stuff
for the kids. And arrange to have my picture
taken with my Haverford football "H".
Boss Gibbs ... OR ELSE
pao e fifty
Dear Miss Baltimore:
Since I am to marry you in a very short time,
I think it best that we should understand each
other in all particulars. First of all, this marriage
will be a (ifty-Fifty affair: in other words, we will
each shore the cost of the household. Another
thing, I must know more about your family, how
they made their money, and, incidentally, how
much money they have.
Another thing, I must be allowed to read your
moil, because if there is anything I hate it is to
have someone (especially someone as intimate
as you will be with me) know something that I do
not. Another thing, I must be permitted to place
my pictures all over the house — no high-toned oils
or etchings for us — all the pictures will be my
artistic photographs, many of which as you know,
have taken first prizes in contests all over the
Another thing, I am going to wear the type of
clothes I desire to wear/ no wife of mine is going
to criticize my suits, shirts or general appearance.
I will have you know that the clothes I have been
wearing since my father started to manufacture
clothes are the best that money con possibly buy.
And if I wont to wear "race-track" clothes, I am
going to do so as often as I please, so there,
there, and there.
And another thing, if the above does not con-
vince you as to who is going to be boss in our
household, I will take the privilege of telling
you — it is to be your future husband, lord and
master, Leonard L. Greif.
And another thing, our library will be composed
from within and without of Boccacio, Balzac, de
Maupassant, and twenty copies of "Aphrodite."
And another thing, — oh, I forget what it was just
now, but I will tell you at the altar.
LEONARD LEVI GREIF, JR.
3 SLADE AVENUE BALTIMORE, MD.
Bom 1913. Entered from The Pork School in 1930.
News Board (2, 3)j Photooraphic Editor (3), Record Boord/
Glee Club (2, 3); Liberal Club (4),- Camera Club (2, 3),
International Relations Club (3).
WILLIAM HENRY HAINES, 3RD
THE CAMBRIDGE GERMANTOWN, PA.
Born 1911. Entered from the Choate School In 1930.
Class Executive Committee (2); Class Vice-President (3);
Junior Prom Committee; Personnel Manager Musical Clubs
(4); Assistant Treasurer Cap ond Bells C4); Advertising Man-
ager Record) Beta Rho Sigma.
I have never written to you beFore but I feel
I must turn to someone now for advice since I
am at a very important cross-road in my life. My
dreams have all been blasted to teenie-weenie
Four years ago I met a most charming boy at a
Society Bridge Carnival. Our meeting soon
blossomed into friendship ond everything was
beginning to look rosy. But, Cynthia, dear, this
Bridge habit of his I fear does work evil. Is it
wrong, Cynthia dear, for a boy to look so expert
at such a game as Bridge? Maybe he slips cards
out of his sleeves or something. Ever since that
first night it has been my ambition to reform him.
At first the experience was thrilling, the thrill of
building up humanity and planning a better, richer
life for both of us. Every Sundoy evening he came
to our house for supper. I cooked while Mother
and he talked of inspirational matters. Then he
and I went to Christian Endeavor where his rich
voice soon won him recognition as leader of the
group singing of hymns.
But, this Fall he stopped coming to see me.
Can it be my cooking? Some of his college mates
told him he was socially prominent and he prob-
ably thinks he Is a little too good for me, although
that does not seem like his true self. I love him
so, worship everything he does. He has such a
pleasant smile and -cuts his hair such a cute way.
His excuse for staying away is that he has to
study history and chemistry but I am almost certain
he is out with a Betty Rho. I had much higher
hopes tor him, too, maybe, someday he could
be a big business man, a broker, a plumbing
manufacturer, a book-seller, a teacher — all these
ambitions teemed through his fertile brain. I fear
that wine, woman and song will exact their toll
and dim the Inner Light of his soul. What should
Ever hopefully thine,
Miss Chestnut Hill
P. S. Cynthia, it was those evenings alter C. E.
that got me!!
Madame Ecks, Mesmerist
Pacific Ghost, Calif.
Dear Madame Ecks:
I am writing to you In weariness and disil-
lusionment. I am tired of the life of an actress,
and I am sick of the people I have to work with.
I wonder if you can help me.
Madame Ecks, I need a husband, a real husband.
Not one of these flashy song-and-dance papas,
and not one of these half-baked personality
boys. I want someone natural, quiet, courteous,
and dependable. Are there any of these left in
the world? I wonder if there are any who don't
smoke or drink or waste time in extra curricular
activities? I wonder if there are any, even, who
don't have slick black hair, or arr/ who have nice
healthy complexions? Madame Ecks, I'd like
that kind of a husband — a strong rawboned
husband who wouldn t bat an eye at all my
tantrums and funny ideas.
Some men are constantly shooting off their
mouths about what they expect from marriage.
I don't want that. Heavens, I'd like to have a
man who would take his marriage as plainly as
he'd eat Shredded Wheat. But I guess they were
all killed off in the Boer War. Then again some
men keep telling me "I love you, I love you."
None of that fake stuff for me. Why couldn't
I meet a man who would say "Hello" when he
sees me, and nothing else? Oh, I am sick of life.
Please look into your crystal ball and tell me
where to hunt for my dream husband, my strong,
tousle-headed, silent man.
ELLWOOD MEACHAM HAMAKER
53 WEST GREENWOOD AVENUE
Miss Jean Scarlot
Dear Miss Scarlot:
I hove looked into my crystal ball and I have
seen your heart's desire there. Go to Havertord
College, in Pennsylvania, and get an introduction
to a sandy-haired chap named Hamaker. Allah
is great. Wire me fifty dollars.
Born 1912 Entered From Lansdowne High Sctiool in 1930.
Chemlslr/ Club 0, 2, 3, 4)f Secfetary (3), President (4).
JOHN OGDEN HANCOCK
2708 HARRISON STREET WILMINGTON, DEL.
Born 1913. Entered from Wilminglon Friends School in 1930.
Spoon Commitlee (3)j Engineering Club (1, 2, 3, 4).
Dear Miss Lonely Hearts:
Since you hove so graciously aided other poor,
lonesome souls find solace for their restrained,
but, nevertheless pronounced desires, I pray that
you may be able to relieve mine.
Miss Lonely Hearts, I want a WOMAN! And
when I say I want a woman that's what I wants!
No beating about the bush by saying that I should
bury myself in work. No beating about the hedge
by reminding me that I am too young to appreciate
the full meaning of giving one's soul and body
(tsk! tsk!) to a chosen mote. Ah, is me!
Miss Lonely Hearts, such insinuations from you
would be mere twiddle-twaddle.
I wants me a woman! Some gorgeous, divine,
statuesque-like creature with the form of a
Goddess! A harmony of ethereal spirit! Truly,
o paragon of the Gods.
The ver/ personification of devotion to one
man, namely, John Ogden Hancock, which Is I,
the writer. •
For all these demands I have not so very much
to offer. I will graduate (the Administration being
willing) from my college in the spring of 1934.
Nor am I an athlete, though I con jump at an idea
or leap at a chance. I doubt if I would simply
slay all the women who shall meet me in response
to this my fervent plea as typified by this letter
and which I hope you will print in your daily
column. But, Miss Hearts, I know my Jtuff, if you'll
pardon the common vernacular, when it comes
to Engineering and even English. All the boys
think I am just peachy.
1 could write more but then I would be leaning
With sincere wishes for prompt attention to
this little matter,
John Ogden Hancock
P. S. But, I am a devil with the slide-rule.
po ge fiMy-four
Manager Reading Ball Team
You oFfered me $10,000 a year to play for
your poohedout team! You have as much chance
of signing me up as a man in a leaky canoe in the
middle of the ocean has of staying alive. It
doesn't take any magnanimous mind to see that
I am worth more than that. And as to your claim
that I should play for you simply because my
present woman lives in Reading, you know what
you can do with that idea. Anyhow, Dean Brown
who Is my po/ says he con get me a job with the
Yanks, and if I keep up my wise-cracks (?) I will
probably take Nick Altrocks place on the Senators.
Did you hear the one I pulled on George Rice
last year at training table? Boy, boy, was he
mod, was he mad!
About that money you loaned me. Listen,
Charley, I mean Sam, I'll get that to you next
week, sure. No kidding, next week, I'll have
that dough right in your mitts. Sure Joe, and say,
my father and mother want you to come out for
dinner some time, and as a favor, will you bring
Madge down with you.
If you are still selling gasoline, could you let me
have a couple of tankfulls on the cuff. The old
man says he refuses to run a free bus line to
Reading any more, and I'll have to buy my own
gas from now on. And it doesn't take any mag-
nanimous mind to figure out that that's impossible,
does it Jack, Joe, I mean George?
Have you seen Penn Charter play ball lately?
Boy, they re going strong, going to win the pen-
nant this year, nobody's close to them. I know
that Montgomery shouldn't have beaten them,
and that Penn Charter should hove had more
than six points, but Sam's got them going like hell
on wheels now.
Listen Bill, I mean Charley, I have to go to a
German class tonight, and then to an art gallery
in the city. I'm very fond of art — in fact I hove
written an editorial on the subject. So I'll close
now — but you'll have to pay more than $10,000
to get me!
Bill, I mean Fred
FREDERICK HANNES HARJES, 3RD
VAUEY FORGE, PA.
Born 1912. Enlered from Penn Charier School in 1930.
Student Council (4); Executive Athletic Committee (4),
Baseball, H (2, 3, 4), Captain (4), New, Board (2, 3, 4);
Sports Editor (3); Editor (4). Record Board.
4318 WYALUSING AVENUE • PHILADELPHIA, PA.
Bom 1911. Entered from Overbrook Hioh School in 1930.
The prize-winning essay for 1933 on
WHAT COLLEGE HAS DONE FOR ME
AND WHAT I HAVE
DONE FOR THE COLLEGE
is herewith reprinted with the kind permission oF
the writer, Samuel Hassman, and The Haverford
College Board of Managers.
When 1 started attending college all my Friends
gave me the bird and five of my friends from the
Bronx were on hand to give me a cheer. But,
now, I may laugh at them and I may say to myself
at any time, since I am a pseudo-Frenchman,
"Laugh, froggie, laugh."
What has this marvelous college done for me?
This divine institution founded in the year of our
Lord 7833? Let me list the actual benefits:
1. I once kibitzed at Bridge; always the boy
who kept the score but never a player. Now I
play Bridge . . passionately, fondly and ador-
ingly. To me, Ely Culbertson is Allah, before
whom there is no other. Allah be praised!
2. Gasping a long sigh of shuddering ecstacy,
I was formerly addicted to the smoking of Russian
cigarettes. All this with exquisite tenderness.
Now, I have learned to smoke ordinary weeds.
My prosaic nature is affected neither one way
nor the other by this acclimation.
3. For three years I was voted the worst waiter
in the college dining -hall. This obiurgatory
epithet bothered me not a jot nor tittle. I served
them one and all with perfunctory tenderness
and remained aloof in my precocious wisdom.
Vive la France! Then, after years at Haverford
I soon attained a skill rarely seen anywhere.
These three accomplishments testify to the
great value of what I have done for the college
and what the college has done for me. More-
over, I have saved enough money to make my
first trip to the 6i/ou (ooohhh . . la. LA). Even-
tually, to a "SPEAK" and finally WEBER'S
I owe all to Haverford.
Actual interview, translated From the original
Czech. The scene is poorly arranged in the
bedroom oF Edward Hendrickson. Edward is
there oF course, and there is the poor, sweating
interviewer From the 1934 Annual. The whole
aFFair went something like this:
Man from the Annual: . . . Now certainly you
must have other interests than your chosen
Field, Engineering. Do you ever do any
reading? Some people have favorite authors
or authoresses. How about yourselF? Is
there some book you have enjoyed more
Ed. the Engineer: . . . Well, I do not do much
reading, only like along engineering or
such. No, I hove not done enough reading
to talk about it . . .
Man from Annual: . . ■ Well, is there anything you
can tell me about yourselF? Everyone on the
campus calls you one of the "Rope and
Pulley Boys" but they cannot say anything
else. Certainly you must have other interests?
Ed. the Engineer: . . . Oh, gosh, eh, heck, no,
. . . that is, oh . . . shucks . . . well, I like
to ice-skate . . . see those Figure-skates?
. . . they keep you From Falling . . . and I
have nosebleeds a lot and . . . oh, gosh,
gee, heck . . . no, there really isn't anything
I do . . . eh, oh, gosh, gee, heck . . .
Man from Annual: (who by now is beginning to
realize the hopelessness oF it all) ... I see.
Isn't there some peculiar trait? What kind
oF pie do you like? Or, do you hove a
favorite movie-star? ANYTHING? . . .
the Engineer: . . . Oh, gee, gosh, I don't
know . . . sometimes I like apple and some-
times mince, but, you can't eat so much mince
. . . I, oh, gee, gosh, I saw Lillian Harvey
lately but, oh, gee, gosh ... I guess I have
no Favorites . . . oh, gee.
EDWARD MIDDLETON HENDRICKSON
CROSSWICKS, N. J.
Born 1912. Entered from Westlown Sctiool in 1930.
Engineering Club (3, 4).
And so, aFter an interview like that, the Man
from the Annual slinks home to his room ... a
BYRON THOMAS HIPPLE, JR.
517 SOUTH HIGH STREET WESTCHESTER, PA.
Born 1913. Entered from West Chester Hioh School in 1930.
Glee Club (1); Orchestra (1); Bond (1); Cap and Bells
(1, 2, 3, 4); Track Manager (4); Field Club. President (3);
Founders Club (4).
West Chester, Pa.
Editor PaciFic Weekly
10 S. Milk Street
In your letter of the 18th of last month you ask,
For the benefit of my reading public, how much
of my "Collegiate Rhapsody" is autobiographical.
Since I did not write the poem with the thought
that any one would take such an intimate interest
in myself, it is with reluctance that I confess that
the section beginning "Another one there was"
L. 695 down to "he sweats like other men" L. 727
is largely autobiographical.
Byron T. Hippie
EDITOR'S NOTE — For the convenience of our readers
we have extracted this section and print it here
"Another one there was, a timid Texan lad;
A oentle, only naughty, never bod
Young man with curly hair and handsome face;
A young Don Juan, but without a trace
Of that great man's low dominating taste;
He was like sad, unchosed Diana, chaste.
He drank his beer and smoked a borrowed butt
With some degree of grace, ond though he cut
The cards at bridge with certain dash and style,
He spoiled the main effect. For his shy smile
Betrayed his inner, nervous perlurbaiion;
In deed, in Fact, he lacked sophistication.
The right to censor books he'd never read.
The right to dump another Fellow's bed,
The right to wear a derby thus on all occasions,
He felt were sacred, safe against invasions
By any power less than God the Father,
(And even he was ordered not to bother).
Now Byron knew the economic world
Wcs run by statesmen who just sat and twirled
Their thumbs in tearful, FeorFul, impotence.
And so to prove the grand omnipotence
Of youth and theory, he rode the horse
Of economics, ond by meniol force
He solved the world's distress in one long paper,
A clever, senseless, intellectual caper.
This great work did, in College dialogue,
Replace our old Sears-Roebuck catalogue
Beside the seats of learning in the halls
Of Center Barclay. But, alas, those colls
To service for mankind have ceased since then;
Down to earth, he sweats like other men."
•-. ■•^:.**-^ 'i,Ttt:>.-_*.i 5
page fifty -eight
Mr. Bernarr McFladden
New York City
Thanks very much for the silver cup. Gee, I, —
it was darn nice of you to go to all that trouble
packing the thing up and everything, because
Christmas, it really must have been a job. You say
you'd like to have a story from me about How I
Got That Way for your new magazine to go along
with the announcement? I really don't have time
to write a whole story, but I could give you some
I won the Berserker Memorial Cup for Strong
Men because 1 have spent years conditioning my
body for it. There are certain things I believe in
doing every day. (1) Eat just as much as possible/
(2) Think seriously about it while eating/ (3) Take
good care of the digestive tract/ (4) Take exercise
which your stomach would never think you had
nerve enough to take/ (5) Gargle often/ (6) Go
to the first show so you can get back in time to
get plenty of sleep/ (7) Eat as much as possible.
To conclude your story, you might give a resume
of my intentions In life. I mean to follow along
the suggestions I got from a certain course in
ethics given by a man named Rufus Jones. 1 believe
In the harmonious use of all one's potentialities.
I believe that the subordinate aims of life —
play, altruism, the aim at knowledge, and the
aim at completion — should be fulfilled without
stinting. I have fulfilled the first by playing foot-
ball and tennis with all my heart and motor cue.
The second I have realized by doing my bit In
the college dining-room, carrying fodder to
starving classmates. The third and fourth have
been combined in my painstaking determination
to land that college diploma. I believe In the
Importance of "the beloved community" and have
found spiritual release in that direction by singing
In the glee club, as well as leading that organiza-
tion. But above all 1 believe humon emotion
reaches its height in married love. That's why I
mail a letter every day to St. Augustine.
With all good wishes,
EUGENE FRANCIS HOGENAUER
2640 MORRIS AVENUE BROIMX, NEW YORK CITY
Born 1909. Entered (rom Evander Ctiilds High School in 1927.
Tennii, H (1, 2, 3, 4), Captain (3), Football, Numerall
(1, 2), H (3)j Editor Handbook (.3), Glee Club (1, 2, 3, 4);
Leader (4), Cap and Bells Club (3, 4), Triangle.
HENRY HOTZ, JR.
Born 1912. Entered from Haverford School in 1930.
Spoon Committee, Chairman; Chairman Blazer Commitfeo
(3); Soccer, Numerals (3), H (4); Track (2, 3, 4), H (3, 4);
Glee Club (4), Record Board; Everett Oratorical Contest (1).
The Give-ond-Stretch Underwear Co.
Peoria Corners, Iowa
My dear Mr. Ponsystitch:
As Agent No. — .07, I beg leave to report:
Business conditions here in the nasty, nasty East
are simply dreadFuI.
But, I do have good news For you, Mr. Pansy-
stitch. Remember reminding me to keep on the
look-out for an illustrator? Well, never in all
my experiences of girdling the globe have I
stepped — into such an experience as I am now
going to tell you.
I was seated in the train reading the recent roporf of
Aoent No. 91, "BALI BRASSIERES, their good pomts,"
which was not such a bloomer as I first thought, when,
suddenly a young chop slipped down beside me. h-te
hod been oitroctod by the title oF the report, ond,
introducing himself as on Art Student from (he school
near Peoria Corners, we soon were engaged in
exchonging confidences. His name is something Itlce
BLOTZ , . SNotz ... no, I have it . . . HOTZ. I
sow some samples of his real-life poses (although he
is shy when it comes to showing his work) and from
these proofs, I om convinced he is our man.
What is all the better, from our point of view, is that
he has evidently had much experience with women.
In fact, he assures me that each one has been more
divine and more perfect than the previous ones, either
collectively or individually. Of course — it sounded
lilce exaggeration, but, we'll guard against such stuff.
I learned from a slip that he pants for the essence of
ChrJstion Science, as a religious dogma. He was
inclined to argue upon ony phase of the creed. In fact
he seemed inclined to argue about anything, not caring
which side he favored, as long as he could argue.
And, Mr. Pansystirch, he was on athlete oi college,
playing soccer (some horrid kicking game) and tossing
a slick called the javelin. He attempted to croon a
song to show me that he reolly was in the Glee Club
at Haverford. (Note: Get Miss Pantibodie to find
out in what country Haverford is.) Fortunately, my
sample-case fell from the rock over our seal and covered
him with what-nots and ihing-mo-bobs, successfully
stifling him for the time.
I hope this thumb-nail sketch will let you know
that I have had my mind on the company's business.
Anthony C. hiemise
P. S. He is very thick when it comes to catching
jokes, and, when you interview him, under no
conditions should you pull his little finger at his
suggestion. I assure you, Mr. Ponsystitch, the
result will be very disillusioning.
Mr. John Hazard
The Old Clipper Ship Line
No I won't go to sea with you. Since you left
college, I've got bock to the style of life I like —
no romance and sea adventure, but good old
economics, governmental studies, sociology, and
banking. I admit I can still lick you, and I keep
in condition by running around the track every
day and chinning myself in the showers, — but
I've got better things to do than to go hand over
hand up the ropes on the mainmast, or to bring
back the second mate after he's got dead drunk.
I'm going to live right here in the U. S. A. and
I'm going to make some dough.
You had me bamboozled for-a long time, I'll
admit. You used to make me think that the end
of life was romance and adventure, and you
persuaded me to major in English so 1 could get
a good background tor appreciating Conrad.
It's lucky for me that you graduated a year before
me after all. During this last year I've hod enough
time to grind away at my practical subjects and
thirty years from now when you are yelling "Thar
she blows! " through grey whiskers I'll be telling
my private secretary to buy me another thousand
shares of Consolidated. Then see who's happier.
As for that trip we mode to Philadelphia when
we slept in the jail and found out how the unem-
ployed live — I've managed to study economics
long enough to get over all your enthusiasm. The
poor we always have v^\th us, John. Why don't
you give Conrad a rest now and then and read
the Bible? You'll never moke any money your
way. I'm sick of all your blather about an exciting
life with no fears about material security. How
will you ever support the 2.381 children that
statistics say you must have a dozen years from
now? Answer me that.
Black Jock Ike wrote me from Panama the other
day. He says there's going to be a revolution
down there in a couple of months. On the whole
I think you might as well overlook what I have
just written. Sign me up as a deck-hand and I'll
be with you in forty-eight hours.
RAY BERTHOLF HOUSTON
LONG HOUSE FARM BELL VALE, N. Y.
Born 1912. Entered from Worwick t-tigh Sctiool in 1929.
Commencement Day Committee, Ctioinnonj Track, Freshman
Team, Cross-Counlry (3)/ Chemistry Club (2), English Club
(3)) Corporation Scholarship (2, 3, 4); Phi Beta Kappa (3, 4).
HUNT BRECKINRIDGE JONES
49 CASTLEWOOD LOUISVILLE, KY.
Born 1914. Entered from Culver Mililarv Academy in 1930.
News Board (1, 2, 3, 4); News Editor (2); Instruinenlal
Club (1, 2, 3, 4), Leader (3, 4); Glee Club (4); Cap and
Bells (3, 4); Cap and Bells Play Cortimilleo (2, 3).
New York Times
New York, N. Y.
In response to your request For samples of my
musical criticisms, I herewith enclose one week's
output for the Haverford News. This is to sup-
plement my application for the position of music
critic on your paper. My column, incidentally, was
the best part of the paper every week.
Besides knowing an awful lot about the
history and about the appreciation of music (I
hate modern music/ it irritates the nerves sol)
I am a connoisseur of beautiful women, ticket seller
supreme for bum concerts, and a promising young
medico (note the use of Latin derivatives showing
extreme culture) I am very frugal, hitch-hiking to
and from my home in Louisville, Kentucky. Here
is the sample:
Dear Music Lovers Everywhere,
Perhaps we were expecting too much lost
night at the Bijou orchestra concert, for it seemed
to us that the orchestra lacked completely the pep
that they showed the lost time I was there. The
pieces, all well known and often played, pre-
sented no great difficulty but the output gave me
a pain in my aesthetic feeling.
Gershwin's "I Got Rhythm" overture which
opened the program, is a piece of little import.
Therefore, we paid little attention to it, except
once or twice when the roggedness of the horns
was almost too evident.
We're not so fond of Irving Berlin's works on
the whole, and weren't overly pleased with
"All Alone," a tone poem. The counterpoint,
what there was of it, was not at all clear (whether
it was the fault of the orchestra or of Berlin, we
can't say) and there was a great deal of unneces-
sary blaring by the brass, we thought. The idea
of the piece is fine — the meditations of a poet
brooding by the telephone and his ultimate
curseword, and his finally getting the right
number, but it all needs better music.
Don't expect a review next week, for we
intend to stay away from the Bij until they stop
playing these modern "hotcha" songs such as
"You Got to Be a Football Hero," and "I've
Got the Jitters." I guess we're too old-fashioned,
but anyhow we're not going."
H. Bach Jones
Since I saw you only last night, I have very
little to report — except that I had the usual
heavenly time followed by the usual long walk
back. That campus — and you — would drive even
Bill Carter to poetry. Away, however, with such
drivel. Let me tell you about the paper I am
writing for one of my English profs. The subject is
"The Prenatal Influence of Godwin on Shelley."
I am trying to make it as hypnotic and satiric as
possible, because this particular prof likes things
that way. Up to this minute I have written exactly
738 words/ when I get to 1738, I shall take time
out for Guy Lombardo. It has been ages since
I danced with you!
Did you know I was cost in another college
ploy? You will be proud of me yet, for this time
I have six whole lines to say, and I wear a full
dress suit for three of them. They offered me the
lead, but when it dawned on me that the hero
was a seducer of innocent maidens, I could not
bring myself to accept the honor.
Sometimes my yearning for you becomes almost
unendurable. I am so lonely in this world of men,
and half the time even the men are not here or
are here in such a way that you would not notice
them. You see, one of my roommates studies every
moment of his time that he isn't running around
that fool track, and the other is always up at
Reading, so I am generally very lonely. Your
gracious allotment of some of your time to me
means more than you will ever know.
Only fifteen seconds are left for completing
this epistle, and then my schedule calls for memoriz-
ing some more poetry — these prep school teachers
of ours are driving me to drink with their outworn
Ideas! Well, as Keats said to Fanny Brice, Time's
P. S. I'll come at 7.30 Wednesday. O. K. ?
ROBERT BRUCE JONES
5538 WAYNE AVENUE PHII^DELPHIA, PA.
Born 1912 Entered trom Germantown Friends School in 1930.
Gitt Committee; Class Treasurer (2); Class Secretary (4);
Soccer, Junior Varsity (1); Numerals (2, 3), H (4); Freshman
Tracl< Team; Tennis, Junior Varsity (2), H (3, 4); Tennis Man-
ager (4)/ Record Board (3, 4), Handbook Editor (4); English
Club (3, 4); Secretary (4), English Club Play (3); Cap and
Bells Spring Play (2); Fall Play (3); Founders Club (4); Biblicol
Literature Reading Prize (3).
I rta^ h . .. . t . h.11 » M i n i
FRANK LEE KENNEDY
610 SHADELAND AVENUE DREXEL HILL, PA.
Born 1913. Entered from Penn Charter School in 1930.
News Board (1, 2)/ English Clob (3); English Club Play (3).
The Following Is o French letter intercepted by the Post Office
Department for no reason at oil except that Farley felt inclined
to check up on something- They translated it and sent it to the
Dear Le Petit Chose; —
This is indeed a strange country, and Philadelphia
is its strangest city! Yesterdoy I was strolling
across the Delaware River Bridge behind a very
despondent looking young man. He was mutter-
ing to himselF, and it sounded as if he were talking
in French. Naturally interested in hearing my
native tongue, I walked a little faster and soon
caught up with him.
He kept repeating five or six sentences in
French, while looking straight ahead, and walk-
ing with thoughtless but steady steps. "J'oime
voyager en France. Jaime filles jollies. Jaime
envoyer les fleurs aux filles jollies. J'aime la
Penn Charter. J'aime etudier le francais. J'aime
"Beg your pardon, ' said I politely. The
stranger gave no reply, nor did he even glance
at me, but in the same monotonous monotone,
insisted on repeating those six loves of his.
A fairly good-looking fellow, he attracted my
deepest attention all the more since I sensed some
impending disaster. He wore exquisite clothes,
including a striking Blue and Gold blazer. But
on he walked, never turning his head one way
or the other, but continually mumbling to himself.
When we reached the middle of the bridge, he
turned to me suddenly and said something that
sounded like "Yowsoh."
I laughed in his face, and his face turned black,
and he bellowed (still in a monotonous monotone)
"Not even you appreciate my genius. "Ah,"
said 1, "what then is your genius?"
He replied, "1 con imitate Ben Bernie, have
spent two summers in France, send many flowers
to many pretty girls, bring the best-looking dames
to the dances, and, above all, went to Penn
Chorter whose emblem is embroidered on the
breast of my beautiful blazer."
Upon completing this list of his talents, he said
dejectedly, "But you have to do more than that
to be somebody, " and jumped gracefully over
the railing. His body floated ephemerally through
the air and was in my sight through its entire
downward course. But, mirabile dictu, when it
reached the river, there was no splash of water,
not a ripple — the body made no impression on
the liquid, nor could I hear it. It just silently dis-
appeared. Is this not a strange country?
The Erector Toy and Doodad Co.
This letter will introduce my kinsman, Thomas
Knight, who, I am of the firm opinion, will do you
much good if you adopt him on your designing
staff. It has always been my opinion that a great
company like yours should pay more than cursory
attention to the qualifications of the men it hires
— In other words, that you should find out not
only whether your prospective employees can
think up Doodads, but whether or not they love
to do so. Now I con unequivocably say that Tom
does love this kind of work. From the cradle on
through college this boy has been tinkering away
at knick-knacks like nobody's business.
But I have further reasons. Thomas is the man
for you, for he understands the psychology of
children who like toys and adults who like gim-
crocks. Tom likes to sit in a big overstuffed chair
smoking a special kind of pipe with his own Tom
Knight (Middleton's) mixture/ as he sits there, his
eye is liable to travel up the wall from the floor
to the ceiling and bock again. "Good place to
run a cord and o couple of rheostats for that old
electric cigar lighter of mine, " he will likely be
thinking. Before the day is out, the chances are
that Tom will be able to sit in the same choir, with
the same pipe between his teeth, and in the some
position, and be able, without so much as moving
a great toe, to throw a switch, adjust a rheostat,
and light his pipe. (You see the lighter operates
by a spark gap between the lighter and the silver
stem core of the pipe. The rheostat is to control
the violence of the bombardment of sparks on the
Perhaps others could show as much inventive
acumen, but few could show it combined with
such ideal philosophy — namely, that of ease, com-
fort and pleasure. Give this man a whacking good
salary so he con buy himself the eases, the comforts,
and the pleasures of life, and you will see a
Newer and Better Doodad Company.
THOMAS MAY KNIGHT, III
e/o HAWAIIAN TRUST CO. HONOLULU, T. H.
Born 1913. Entered from Punahau Academy in 1930.
Glee Club (3, 4); English Club (1, 2); Enoineerino Club
(2, 3, 4), Secretory-Treasurer (3).
HERMAN ADAM LINGERMAN
226 FOURTH STREET BUTLER, PA.
Born 1907. Entered from Wyoming Seminary in 1930.
Cop and Gown CommiHee; Track (1, 2, 3, 4).
Lamia Simple McFlercewoman
Foursquare and a half
Well, well! It's been a long time, hasn't it
Lamy? I've wanted to write you a letter for
months, but my Theological work has kept me
on the ball every minute. You know, by Jeez,
it's a funny thing how I got into this racket in the
first place. Twenty or so years ago when I was
just a kid starting in college, I thought I wanted
to be a minister. No stuff! That was before I
came under your influence. Of course, then, there
was a time when I thought I wanted to gel a
Ph.D. in Government and take bar examinations
and teach in college and maybe go into public
life. Public career! That's what I'm doing, all
right, but being head of the First Faithhealing
Spiritualist Union is something different from being
state legislator. Last week I cured a couple of
coses of paralysis by laying on of hands. She
was some looker, too, by Jeez.
Lamy, I thought you and I could do each other
some good. Why don't we team up? I'm getting
rather sick of this territory around Philadelphia,
and I'm also getting a little conscience-struck.
Sometimes I think it would be better even at this
late date, if I turned to something clean like
politics. Don't get me wrong. I don't want to
chisel in on you. I'll sell my outfit down here very
reasonably to one of your bunch/ then I'd come
down to Los Angeles and do just enough work
For you — stenographic if you want to — to carry
me along quietly for a while. You may think I'm
crazy, but I want to read some philosophy — espe-
cially Nietzsche and Tolstoy and Bergson. I'd
also like to hove you introduce me to some of the
babes there in Hollywood. In other words, I
wont a little peace and meditation. If at the end
of a year or so of it, I want to decide to go bock
to my original plan of economics and government,
I'll do so. If not, I'll reserve the right to buy back
my old outfit and tell the public I've been away
to the Holy Land.
Let me know.
TO THE READERS OF THIS ANNUAL!
We, the dear editorial staff, tiave called to
your attention the fact tfiat you are now touching
a page hallowed by its consecration to one of
our class-mates, Douglas Lockard, the Baltimore
Chemist with an eye on The Pennsylvania Medical
College, God-willing. We are awed by the
futile attempts at writing an appropriate persons!
letter for this likeable young man for no one seems
able to handle the delicate job.
To get a good mental image of Doug, just draw
a short, straight line. There you have this young
chap. For, he is as keen-wilted and as neat-
appearing in manner and mannerisms as the care-
fully plotted line. But, we cannot devote a full
page to that.
Doug is delightfully dumpy and would easily
pass at a masquerade for a pudding-dumpling,
with gravy. Yet, we cannot write an entire page
over somebody being dumpy, or looking like a
dumpling with gravy.
He studies an awful, awful lot and when he
finishes, he studies some more. He did next year's
work, last year, and last week's assignments two
years ago and he had all his Ethic's papers written
^hen he was a Sophomore. You know, and can
see the point, Doug is like that. Always days and
days and years ahead of everybody else in getting
his homework done. But, you can't v^rite a whole
page because a guy does his homework, can you?
He likes baked beans. Finish that yourself.
A regular shark at Bridge.
Heck, all we can think of is to call him cute
The staff admits defeat on this assignment and
offers a reward for persons calling at the Staff
Headquarters, said persons being able to do
better than this.
Love to you all,
THOSE LinLE DEVILS
FROM THE EDITORIAL BOARD
JAMES DOUGLAS LOCKARD
964 MADISON AVENUE, APT. H COLUMBUS, OHIO
Born 1912. Entered from Forest Park High School in 1930.
Class Vice-President (1); Chainnon Freshman-Junior Donee
Commitfeej Soph-Senior Donee Commtttee; Chairman Basket-
boll Dance Committee; Glee Club (1, 2, 3, 4); Cop ond Bells
(3, 4); Chemtstry Club (3, 4); Freshmon Track Team.
BENJAMIN S. LOEWENSTEIN
580 PELHAM ROAD GERMANTOWN, PHILA., PA.
Born 1912. Entered from Germantown High School in 1930.
Freshman-Junior Dance Committee; Tennis, Freshman Teom;
Junior Varsity (2); Ivy Committee (3); News Board (1, 2, 3),
Make-up Editor (1), News Editor (2), Managing Editor (3)j
News Service Board (1, 2, 3, 4), Director (4), Record Board,
Editor-in-Chief; Basketball Manager (4); Debating (1, 3)/
Everett Orotoricol Contest (1); Classical Club (2); inter-
national Relations Club (2, 3); Founders Club (3, 4); Centenary
Dear Bennie Loewenstein, Jr.:
You have been at college two months and It
is about tiine for you to have a little advice on
HOW TO BE SUCCESSFUL WHILE
From experience I know just what I am talking
about so don't you go asking me silly questions.
In your first place, be friends with everybody
who is of importance: professors, students or
anyone else on the campus. There are, of course,
various and divers ways of creating valuable
friendships, but, since you are a chip off the old
block, you have Inherited a natural tendency
along these lines.
In the first year, do not study too hard, but get
out after the big campus activities. This will moke
your marks extremely low at first, but then you
can work more assiduously in the last two years
and, maybe, win the Improvement Prize.
Do not bother with a girl until your senior year
and then choose her only from Vassar or some
other high-class college. She herself should be of
the first water and to her you should devote
yourself with all your heart. Do not go in for any
rough stuff, son, for sex is a beautiful thing and a
man must have a happy family life, with plenty
of incomes, substantial insurance, and healthy
Guard your tongue carefully and even though
you may find it in your power to know fully what
the entire campus is doing in its spare moments,
do not be a "news-dispenser."
The one thing you must positively not do is to
edit your class annual. I have many reasons for
this warning; you lose all friendships you so
carefully established and "nobody wants to
write-you-up" for the blame thing.
Please give much thought to this advice from a
Without a doubt I owe you an apology for
letting this letter go as long as it has but you
know how things have been at Dad s place and
I hove been head over heels in work trying to
get the muddle straightened out.
With regard to this fellow Loomis, about whom
you wrote, let me assure you that I believe he
will be the man needed and most suited for the
job you have at hand and I am delighted that
he mentioned my name for reference.
While at college he was a Physics Major and
since you yourself failed to pass your Physics I
Final Exam, you are aware of what stuff this fellow
has in him. He was extremely good-natured
while at school and I con say without exaggerat-
ing that Dave did not have on enemy during his
four years there. In fact, he was the focal point
for much good-natured teasing, all of which
would hove driven you or me or hundreds of
others to seek for means of revenge. Instead,
Dave seemed to laugh most heartily when the
joke was on him.
He is, though, a little bit shy and I never saw
him pal around with many of the fellows. He is
gifted with a friendly nature, however, and will
gladly talk when once started. He is content to
mind his own business and faithfully performed
any tasks assigned to him, a fact which you will
be especially glad to hear and have doubtless
observed for yourself by this time.
He is not a rapid-fire boy and takes his time
In whatever he does, reaching the ultimate goal
at his own speed, but he always reaches what
he goes after. I hope you will be able to get
him to work a little more rapidly than when he
was at College for while he has efficiency he
certainly must combine it with speed if he wishes
♦o stay with you.
The thing I remember most about him is the day
he occidenriy set his hair on fire. It happened in
the Chem. Lab. and caused much excitement. The
Chem. Prof, rushed in and surprised Loomis by
charging him fifty-cents for a SINGE!
This letter isn't much but it tells you as much as
I know and I hope it helps.
DAVID GREENE LOOMIS
275 MONTCLAIR AVENUE NEWARK, N. J.
Born 1912. Entered (rom Barringer High School in 1930.
Glee Club (4), Inslrumenlol Club (2), Mothemalics Club
(4); Field Club (1, 2), Radio Clob (1).
FREDERICK REIMER LYDECKER
48 LINCOLN STREET GLEN RIDGE, N. J.
Born 1913. Entered from Glen Ridge High School in 1930.
I haven't told you about my boy friend at
Haverford have I? He's positively the sweetest
thing. He's got curly black hair, fair skin, and
SUCH eyes . . . He likes me to call him "Don
Juan" — vvhy, God only knows — but it seems to
please and when he looks pleased he is ABSO-
LUTELY irresistible. He gets all flustered and
smiles In a sheepish way and says in a big gruff
voice "Cut it out."
He tells me he's quite an aviator too. He's
got ever so many hours of solo flying to his credit
towards his commercial license or some such thing.
It's all very complicated. He knows such a lot
about flying — wing spreads, and radio engines,
and slip seams, and stream lines, all of which he
tries to get across to me, and in self defense I
nod and brightly say, "Yes. Of course."
And you know, he's o budding AUTHOR.
The other night he finally opened up and let
me in on the great secret. His next story is almost
bound to be accepted by some pulp magazine/
I've forgotten its name . . . "Hell-Birds Awing"
or some such title. But he's the most self-conscious
boy about it. He won't show me the stories.
He says, "Aw, you wouldn't like them. Anyway,
there's too much swearing in them." Pardon me.
He tells me he's quite convinced the boys at
college that he's never been drunk. Well, I
suppose it is a matter of definitions.
He's a nice kid but he certainly does choose
the wettest set of bosom pals. There was one
from Norristown. All he talked about was
Bulcks. Can you imagine?
Well, write me soon.
Dear Mother and Dad:
College is great and you would never recognize
your young son now since he is all rigged out
in an attire commonly, and I mean commonly, called
the Rhinie Outfit. But everything is done in fun
and no one seems to mind so very much, realizing
that the Rhinies get their chances on the next
class that comes in.
Dad asked me to look up about his friend's son,
Bob McKee, and I hove met Bob several times.
He is a large, good-natured egg, full of fun and
almost always laughing with a most enormous
chuckle that sounds like the bull we have down
in the pasture. This Bob is really huge in size,
built In the form of a rectangle with light hair.
I have learned already that he has two pet
hobbies, namely. Photography and Golf. Not
only is he playing a big role along photographic
lines for the year-book of his Senior Class, but
Bob has played with a marked degree of success
in many golf tournaments. You should get to
know him, Dad, in spite of the fact that you just
broke "two hundred."
His size, bellowing voice and good-nature
have all helped to give him such nicknames as
"Mac," "Dotten," "Bruggy," "Lord Plushbottom"
and a host of others which it would be too
difficult to remember. When he isn't tied around
a camera, he is driving a golf ball up and down
a nearby lawn with several of his friends.
I understand that he loves to tour the country
in his Ford and has made several trips out West.
One of them was a regular camping trip with a
Hinkie Haines, whose father you know also.
Dad. Hinkie and Bruggie must have had the
time of their lives for 1 have often heard them
speak about their journey.
I almost forgot to tell you that Bob is the Captain
of the 1934 Golf Team, having received this
distinction following three years of splendid
play. That is positive proof that he has a host
Well, I must have this off in a few minutes to
catch the mailman.
ROBERT WILSON MCKEE
414 SOUTH 47TH STREET PHILADELPHIA, PA.
Born 1911. Enlerod from Episcopal Academy in 1930.
Spoon Committee; Chairman Ivy Committee (3); Golf (2, 3, 4),
H (3, 4), Captain (4); News Board (2, 3, 4); Photographic
Editor (3, 4); Record Boards International Reloiions Club (3).
WILLIAM FRANCIS MAXFIELD
217 SOUTH CASSINGHAM ROAD
Born 1913. Entered from Columbus North School in 1930.
Gill Committee, Chairman/ Instrumental Club (1, 2, 4),- Band
(1, 2); Cap and Bells (2, 3, 4); Engineerina Club (1, 2, 3, 4),
Resting in a corner of an old closet a Diary was found, relic
of another day. A fev/ whisks of the handkerchief and a slow
thumbing of the pages, then to stop at:
To my Diary:
Well, old diary, I have left Bill Maxfield at
the station for his trip back to Columbus, Ohio.
I hated to see him go. Somehow he was so much
fun and so sincere and conscientious in whatever
he tried. I can remember loads of things about
"Mox" as so many of us called him.
He was greatly interested in Engineering even
though his father is a Psychology Prof, at Ohio
State U. And speaking of that University reminds
me of the way Bill used to praise it. You often
wondered why he never went there. Everything
the gang used to argue about would be greeted
with Bill's "Now, out at Ohio State they do . . "
and then would follow a glistening tale of that
apparent paragon of all colleges. And he was
pretty good at German, too, altho' he was
better on the Sax. Gosh, that Sax. He was
kinda all pepped up with that thing. Diary, when
we were Rhinies, but we gradually talked him
out of it. It wasn't seen after the middle of our
Yes, and I remember the way he loved to
skate. Morning, noon and night . . . heaven
only knows when he got his work done . . .
the Mox would be down skating. He was fairly
clever on stunts with those steel blades. Outside
of ice skating he wasn't so very much In athletics
although in his Senior year he showed consider-
able promise as a Football player. There, as in
everything else, he gave all he had.
I have often wondered. Diary, whether that
girl over in Germantown was really a cousin as
he claimed. Gosh, for a cousin he was sure inter-
ested in her. Although another girl named after
a cigar and The World War began to rear her
head into what had been peaceful harmony.
But, there used to be a girl from Swarthmore
College. I wonder whatever became of her.
Do you know. Diary, I used to like her myself a
He was a fit companion for Lord Plushbottom
McKee and Shorty Atmore when it came to doing
Indian War whoops. Good old "Mox."
Mr. Edgar Blest
The Great Middlewest
I am enclosing some verse I recently discovered
in the Journal of Profound Matf)ematics. It is by
a young graduate of Haverford, one Nichol.
I think it has unity, coherence and emphasis. It
is an unusual thing for poetry to appear in a
mathematical publication, and I think the implica-
tions are great for you and myself. Here is the
SONG OF THE PARABOLA
Surd of rhe North rhol rests in quadratic gloom,
Where are your asymptotes, your fiery binomials?
The focal points that hung on function's bosom
From the mathematical womb to the mathematical tomb.
Think v^hat has gone into that poem! Think of
the scope of sympathy a man must have to produce
such an effect of love, forgiveness, hesitancy,
challenge — all in the ineffable realm of numbers!
I tell you we have made a find. Of course I found
out what I could about this Nichol. He studied
mathematics when he was at Haverford, developed
a reputation for puns (something you and I will
have to look into and suppress), and got many
letters from a young Spanish girl. Putting these
facts together, I determined to meet him, but
when I went to his rooms in New York, I couldn't
find him. They say he is so short that he often
escapes notice, so I haven't exactly given up
But bock to this poem. I feel that it is a lesson
for both of us, especially you. I'd like to see you
get a little of the same rich spiritual suggestion
into the poems you write about raisin pie and
the kitchen range. Nichol shows that it is pos-
sible to be at once a student of that most abstract
and rigorous thing, mathematics, and yet to be
thoroughly human. I wager the rascal uses pro-
fanity. I know the type. And he would be one
to complain about the food. Composers of verse
never did bow to the status quo.
HERBERT JAMES NICHOL
43 SOUTH CLIFTON AVENUE • ALDAN, PA.
Born 1913. Entered from Overbroolc High School in 1930.
Gift Committee; H^veifordidn Board (2), English Club
(1, 2); Everett Oratorical Contest (2), Poetry Prize (1).
page s e v e n t y - 1 h r e e
RICHARD RUNDLE PLEASANTS
DARBY ROAD PAOLI, PA.
Born 1912. Entered from Montgomery School in 1930.
Class President (1, 2); Permanent Class Secretory (4)^
Student Council (1, 2, 3, 4); Football, H (1, 2, 3, 4), Captain
(4)i Track (1, 2), Numerals (3, 4); English Club (1, 2), Play
(1, 2),- Glee Club (1 , 2, 3, 4)i Cap and Bells Club (4)j Founders
A gentleman with the air of a newspaper
man, in fact smelling of printer's ink is interviewing
young man who persists in holding a football.
The young man's stand-offish air implies that he
is from some very respectable place, perhaps
even Bryn Mawr. If we listen to what is going
on, I may not have to fell you anything further
about the young man. If may even get to be
dramatic before it is over.
N. P. M.: Do you like football? Y. M.: Well,
uh, football is, uh . . . N. P. M.: Thanks, Coptoin
Pleasants. Now, is it also true that you hold the
record of making the longest run on Walton Field?
Was it ninety-eight yards or something like that?
Y. M.: Why, uh, the way it happened was, uh . . .
N. P. M:. Yes, I thought so. Thank you. Now the
readers of our paper would like to know just
what you think of pep talks by coaches before
the game. Do you personally approve or disap-
prove of them? Do you think they are juvenile?
y. M.: Well, there's certainly a lot of . . . N.P.M.:
Thank you, Captain Pleasants. I am sure our
readers will be glad to hear such an unbiased
opinion. Ahem! It is true, is it not, that you have
held numerous class offices and that you are
actively connected with the Student's Council?
/. M. (determinedly grinding his nails through the
pigskin cover): . . . Well, uh, football has been
a . . . N. P. M.: Thanks, sir. It is so nice to meet
a young fellow such as yourself who possesses
the ability of uniting sports and studies without
impairing either himself or his proficiency in com-
petition. Y. M. (his eyes have a funny store)
Football is, uh . . . N. P. M.: Captain Pleasants,
since I understand that your chosen field is French
literature, is it true that you desire to teach your
favorite sport and study at Montgomery School,
your former alma mater? /. M.: (his biceps
stiffening) Football . . . N. P. M.: Thank you for
your time, Capt. Pleasants, and I assure you that
the article will be printed just as you wish. Is
there anything more you'd like to add? /. M.
(roaring and drawing a revolver with which he
kills the reporter) Football is no good, don't let
me hear you mention it again, or I'll make you
Dean Falnall Clown
We have, in our so-called jail, a young man,
claiming to be a Senior in your so-called college.
He says to write to you for reference and bail;
he says if you can't give him a clean bill and boil,
God in heaven above only knows. We nabbed
him for going through a red light, and smashing
into the car of our so-called mayor. Oh yes, his
name is Asa Wing Potts (so-called Si, for short).
Now, Si pulls a long cock-and-bull stor/ about
how he is slightly color blind, says he can't tell
the difference between red and green.
Well, it all looks rather fantastic to my way of
thinking, to say the leost. Si soys he tells whether
to go ahead or stop by looking at the light and
seeing whether the upper space is lit or the lower
one; soys he can tell that way. Well, Dean, it so
happens that in our town things in general are
reversed, and the lights in particular, and so he
crashed, with little doubt existing as to whether
or not he crashed. Anyhow, he crashed.
Now, Dean, can you tell me whether Si, as
you know him, is telling the truth about himself.
To further identify him in your mind, I might add,
that at the time we apprehended him (and we
had to run pretty fast and jump rather high to catch
him) he was unshaven, wearing the damndest-
looking gold rim glasses that 1 ever saw, dressed
in a horrible combination of red shirt, green tie
and corduroys, the latter being extremely sloppy
and held up by polka-dot suspenders.
Not only is he held on charges of so-called
assault and battery by automobile but we also
think he is a trifle daffy. His conversation is a
terrible jargon of principles of economics, chem-
istry and socialism. He keeps repeating, "1 should
never hove changed Majors/ but maybe 1 should
have. Well, 1 can play soccer and 1 can ploy soccer,
and I can high jump. Do you wont to subscribe
to Charity, a little bit, mister?" It all befuddles
us, Dean, can you help? By the way. Si mentioned
that you might need a good detective around
your campus, how's about it?
So-Called Police Commissioner
ASA WING POTTS
254 WEST WALNUT LANE • GERMANTOWN, PA.
Bom 1912. Entered from Germantown Friends School in 1930.
Commencement Day Committee^ Track Squad (1, 2), Numerals
(3, 4)i Soccer, Junior Varsity (1, 2, 3, 4), Numerals (4), Record
Board (4), Liberal Club (1, 2, 3, 4), Executive Committee
(4)i Chemistry Club (1, 2)i International Relations Club (3))
Chairman Charity Chest Committee (4).
PHILIP BURTT RICHARDSON
236 VAN HOUTEN AVENUE PASSAIC, N. J.
Born 1911. Entered from Westtown School in 1930.
Closs President (1); Closs Executive Committee (1, 2, 4);
Permanent Committee (4); Class Day Committee; Student
Council (1, 2, 3, 4), Executive Athletic Council (4),- Secretory
(4); Customs Committee (2, 3, 4); Choirman (4); Soccer,
Numerals (1), H (2, 3, 4); Basketball, Numerals (1), Track,
Numerals (1), H (2, 3, 4); Business Manager Record}
Engineering Club (1, 2); Everett Oratorical Contest (1)j
Founders Club Award (1).
Miss Elizabeth Wiswall
Dear Miss Wiswall:
Do you, or do you not, know Mr. Philip Richard-
son? This is the reason we ask: Early in the fall
of his Senior year, Philip who has a charge
account with us, ordered some stationery — 200
sheets and 200 envelopes, with your name and
address printed on the front of the envelopes.
He charged the order — $4.50 — but he makes so
many trips to Wellesley (to see a girl he knows
up there) and to Falmouth (to see a girl he knows
up there) that he cannot pay our bill. Could
you pay us the sum,- after all, the things had your
name on them, and you have most of them by this
time. Could you, Miss Wiswall, would you?
There, that's our business letter, now let me
tell you about this fellow Richardson. He is
naturally a reticent boy, so probably doesn't tell
you all about himself. In fact, if he acts around
your house like he acts here, he no doubt sleeps
95 per cent of the time — and comes to meals late,
never uses soap, and charges you for rides in
that big, beautiful Buick of his. First of all — he is
the dirtiest soccer player in the Eastern League.
Then again (the thing about which he boasts
most often) he took French 2 for so many years
that he was eventually made Professor of Romance
Languages-(where he would obviously be quickly
forgotten) but he was fired soon thereafter. The
president asked him one day who wrote Com-
fort's "French Composition" and your Hero (ours
also, confidentially) didn't know!
He has never brought the same girl to any of
the college dances. Among one-fourth of the
Student Body he is the most unpopular man on
the campus because of the fiendish tortures he
perpetrates on the Rhinies. He has darling black
wavy hair, and the nicest skin — but, of course,
you know all of his physical attributes, so we
won't bother you with them.
In closing may we repeat our first plea — could
you, would you. Miss Wiswall?
Manager of the Haverford
The following letter was intercepted by the
Year Book's own mystic and is herewith presented
minus Mr. Foxy's quaint misspelling — mainly because
we're too lozy to try an imitation of his style . . .
Much doth thy activity on Haverford's greens-
ward warm the cockles of my heart. Never have
I seen such wholehearted support of the Inner
Light since my early connections with the Seekers.
Thomas, believe an old hand at the game of
righteousness when I tell thee thot thee hath oil
the characteristics necessary to make a name for
thyself in Quakerdom. Thy determined chin, thy
quiet manner till thee is aroused, thy belief in a
pure body and a pure mind, and thy distrust of
war as a means of international policy — all these
i had, and my predecessors before me. Thee
should go far in thy chosen profession of Quaker
— and those mild blue eyes which at times hove
a divinely earnest glint!
Oft hath my spirit watched over thee in the
Students' Council meetings. Amidst all the
ungodly clamour in those meetings, thee hath
kept thy head and insisted on clear and concise
interpretations of the rules. Although other
members are intent on getting out of the conclave
as early as possible, thee hath continually insisted
on getting things right. Might I odd that some
county in the kingdom of heaven will be set aside
for those rare and square-jawed men who take
their jobs seriously?
And I am glad, Thomas, that unto thy heart
thee has taken a virgin for love and admiration.
She'll odd years unto thy life, even though she
bothers thee now with eight- and ten-page letters.
Thomas, I am deeply interested in thy fight
against the CMTC. That institution must go, and
your breaking off diplomatic relations with a
dear friend because he signed up with that arm
of the devil will help destroy it.
Inner Lightly thine,
ARTHUR THOMAS RICHIE
154 EAST MAIN STREET MOORESTOWN, N. J.
Born 1511. Entered from Moorestown Friends School in 1930.
Class Vice-President (3, 4), Permanent Vice-Presidentj
Class Executive Committee (1, 2); Senior Prom Committee;
Student Council (4); Customs Committee (4), Soccer, Numerals
(1), H (2, 3, 4), Captain (4); Baseball, Numerols 0, 2), H
(3, 4), Liberal Club (3, 4),- Engineering Club (1, 2, 3, 4);
Chairman Executive Committee (3); President C4); Founders
NORMAN JOHNSON RUSH
1110 MILLCREEK ROAD JOHNSTOWN, PA.
Born 1913. Entered from Wesllown School in 1930.
Class Treasurer (4); Soccer, Junior Varsity (2), Numerals
(3), H (4); Track Squad (2, 3, 4); Basketball, Junior Varsity
(2); Chemistry Club (1, 2, 3, 4), Cap and Bells Spring Play
WHOOSIS MEDICAL COLLEGE
Little America, South Pole
I received your radiogram asking my help in
getting a young man to help you in your work.
I recommend most highly one of our youngest and
most able graduates. His name is Norman J.
Rush. I consider him mentally and physically fitted
for the tasks you mention. In the first place he is
chubby. Those extra layers of blubber will keep
him warm, and in case of necessity would furnish
you a great many units of energy if taken internally.
(Shake well before using.) Also you might find
it convenient to disguise him as an Eskimo Fuller
Brush man in order to obtain detailed informa-
tion about the private lives of your native neigh-
bours. In the second place he plays bridge with
a persistency which is matched only by his rashness
in bidding. He has played through so many long
evenings here at college that I am sure you would
find him willing to make a fourth at any time during
your Antarctic night. In the third place think of
having a pole-vaulter in your party, airily jumping
from floe to floe on his way to get food and sup-
plies for your wrecked party! In fourth place he's
clever with his feet/ yes, a soccer player. He
might possibly train a couple of seals for you with
those nimble feet of his.
So you see. Admiral Byrd, I think you'll find
this young man one of the most enticing bargains
you'll ever run across in a day's shopping.
Agatha T. Quack
P. S. He's a good doctor. What a bedside
Mrs. Dhandi and I were extremely glad to get
your letter, and we thank you for all the good
recommendations from your philosophy professors,
your college president and your society friends.
Granted that there were the kind of position here
that you want — teaching philosophy and tutoring
thirteen-year-old girls, — I have no doubt that you
would fill the bill perfectly. I con see that your
problem is a real one — whether to stay in the
U. S. and to get a good job in business so you
con marry and settle down, or to return to Egypt.
From what your professors say, I have no doubt
that you have enough moral stamina to combat
these difficult conditions in Egypt, or even in
India. But, Henry, it takes more than that: you
need to be religious. Have you got religion?
Have you lost your faith? If I didn't have religion,
I don't know where I'd be. I think you'd better
stay in America another year and try to pull
your ideas together. But let me give you a few
Throw your Rubiayat into the waste-bosket,
and put Stevenson's Apology for Idlers into an
old bureau drawer where you won't find it.
Hang up your tuxedo for a year, put on your
overalls and go back to the fields of Nebraska
and pitch hay. See if you can go for a whole
year without falling in love. Quit the cigarettes,
and the pipes, too. Give movies and burlesque
shows a rest for a twelvemonth. Spend so little
money that you won't even have to think about
that careful expense account. Leave your com-
rades when you can and go off by yourself and
meditate. Then, and only then, should you think
about coming to India and studying Indian
philosophy. Am I the voice of your conscience,
Henry? I have a sneaking notion that I am.
I don't want to be a wet blanket, but I have
another sneaking notion that you'll end up with
a good steady job with Vacuum Oil or Provident
Mutual. But that's all right. You'll make a good
Happy birthday, and don't take my words too
HENRY GIFFEN RUSSELL
ASSUIT COLLEGE ASSUIT, EGYPT
Born 1912. Entered from Hotchltiss School in 1930.
Class Treosurer (2), Sophomore-Senior Donee Committee,
Junior Prom Committee; Cooperative Store Committee (1, 2,
3, 4), Choirmon (4); Tennis, Junior Varsity (2, 3X H (4J; Cross
Country Squad (4); News Board (4)/ Glee Club (1); Liberol
Club (3, 4), Vice-President (4).
AWBURY, GERMANTOWN, PA.
Born 1912. Entered from GermonJown Friends School in 1930.
Senior Prom Commilleej Track, Freshman Team, Numerals
(2), H (3, 4), Cross Couniry Squad (2, 3), H (4), Liberal
Club (1, 2, 3, 4), Secretary (3); President (4).
"PEACE MARCHES ON"
Setting oFf stage can be heard the roaring oF
cannons as they fire a nineteen hundred and
one-half gun salute. A military band is playing
■LONG LIVE THE DEMOCRATS". Twenty
million and seven fully armed soldiers stand with
bayonets drawn. Suddenly a bugle is blown.
Then another bugle is blown. Then, to make it
even, two blowns are bugled and a path exactly
seven-eighths of an inch wide appears through
the angry mob of drawn bayonets and a young
man is seen walking on his hands across the
bellies of the dead and wounded, collecting
postage stamps before him.
It would be foolhardy to say he appears war-
like, as he places on the floor his revolvers and
two gas-masks. From around his neck hangs a
chain of withered human skulls. Roger Scatter-
good, for 'tis none other, has been doing some
tall skull-duggery. In an instant, in an instanter
instant, he is before the microphone. He speaks:
I am Scaltergood, leader of the movements for
peace. I am against everything concerned with
War . . . War . . . Wars. Crimes and Wars . . .
Wars you there, Charrlie? (/lere Roger ducks a
rotten pineapple plant which explodes with a
bang, blowing oft the back of the auditorium) . . .
' have done much peace carovaning for my cause
and should be made the head of all Peace Move-
ments . . . Drop your arms . . . Might will not
make right . . . My experience in the College
Liberal Club has shown me that ... I am the
head of my College Club, (so there) (someone
stabs him in the leg with a penknife, but Roger,
does not seem to mind since the doctor told him
he was to have as much iron in his blood as he
could stand. Roger is still standing.) . . . What
if I am a Quake? ... I can hold my own with
the white people ... I am equally at home with
the common people and the conventional types
. . . Down with Capitalism . . . Hurray for Cap-
italism . . . (notice how he plays with the mob!)
. . . I am a man of many interests, and have been
on my college track team ... I am ever awake
. . . (But, here Roger is interrupted by a voice
reminding Roger of the night he, Roger slept out
all night when his car became frozen, Roger not
even telling his Dad. Roger, at this unexpected
attack on his good name, wilts like a lily, and
tlys thru the ceiling).
Somewhere in Tabasco, Mexico
December 22, 1933
I meant to call up before leaving for Mexico
to tell you I was going and why, but a card game
got going in Fifth Entry (incidentally, my luck
changed, and that's where I made enough money
to take the trip) and it continued so far into the
night that by the time it was over I knew you'd
be in bed.
This is why I came down here — last week I
read about the convention of the National
Revolutionary Party in Queretaro in which Senor
Perez, a delegate, said/ "There is no God. God
exists only in petrified souls. Down with God. "
Says I to myself, that Perez son-of-a-gun is a
genius, for I have noticed that all genii have
been atheists. So I hopped off by plane from
Camden (after stopping at Weber's for a beer or
two) and am now in Tabasco at Perez's home,
having a darn fine time. Already I know enough
of the language to talk about calculus to his son's
tutor/ in fact beginning next week I am going
to be the tutor.
I plan to go back to college in time for the com-
prehensives, and since I am only taking two of
them, there will be no trouble from that quarter.
What I am worrying about is the Math Club/
what they and Little Al will do without me is
more than I know. But I will write to them often.
Senor Perez has asked me to join his party, but
you know how much I detest ioining any organiza-
tion/ the only reason I joined the Math Club was
because I couldn't help it.
This will have to be a short note I fear, because
some of those lousy Mexicans are shooting things
up to beat all hell down in the town below our
hacienda. Senorita Perez (what a babe she is,
too) says they are clearing the way for a new
president, and I want to be there at the finish
of the present administration.
As Einstein says in "Relativity," xi, x", =pi, Q',
or "Merry Christmas to you. Pop, and three good
glasses of beer."
The blessings of Ingersoll on you,
1529 GERMANTOWN AVENUE
Born 1912. Entered from Northeosl Higti School in 1930.
Soccer, Junior Varsity (4), Crickol (3, 4); President Math-
ematics Club (4), Corporation Scholarship (1, 2, 3, 4), Phi
Beta Kappa (3, 4).
BOX 143 TOWACO, N. J.
Born 1913. Entered from Newark Academy in 1930.
Liberal Club (3, 4), Secretary (4).
To my adorable Dr. Horsedon:
Do you realize that the ape can catch your
cold and you can catch his?
That sentence means nothing, and I only put it
there to catch your eye and to attract your atten-
tion to that bit of composition which I am now
writing to you, so to speak, that Is to say, as it
I have always admired you and respected your
opinions and it is For those reasons, mainly, that
I am taking the Government Major. Your thoughts
and ideals spur me on to better thoughts and
reasoning and it is for your own good and my
personal benefit that I am interested enough in
you to remind you tactfully that you con catch the
ape's cold and he can catch yours! It is from your
guidance and inspiration that I once carefully
decided to go out and conquer the world, although
I have long since given the idea up as a bust.
(You Mae-West assured I do not hold it against
your dogma. Get it? The pun, I mean? About
Mae West and — ?)
I wish I could find your romantic side, fori, too,
am a little romantic and the boys take secret sport,
some of them do, anyway, in making sport of my
marcellishly shaped hair. I do wish you would
find time to drop into my room for a cup of coffee,
which I frequently brew. Romance is a great
thing. Even horses have romance and sex, I am
You can see how our minds run in different
lanes together. I am also interested in automobile
designing and I would be very glad to show you
my drawings at any time you mention. Added to
this will be found my passion for horses since
they are such dumb but understanding animals.
1 love them. Do you?
I am not much of a one for athletics but do adore
indoor sports and games. I think "Scratch-as-
scratch can" is swell. Don't you play that some-
But, there goes Founder's Bell for dinner, and
with this I leave.
Scalpwell Medical School
You ask me for a recommendation of Frank
Siebert to your Medical School. I believe I can
throw both light and mud on the subject. This
Siebert, it should be said at the outset, has a
passion for the art of medicine, he is serious, and,
without a doubt, it could be said that he is a boy
of irrefutable probity. He also wears glasses.
But there are details I must come to in a minute
which may put rust on these golden words.
This Siebert boy loathes women, and he abhors
English literature, especially Byron, Kelly and
Sheets. Do you think it is right for the American
public to have such a one-sided whippersnapper
learning the art of needle, scalpel, saw and
axe? He might very well be called to the bedside
of a bleeding poet or a jitter/ woman and throw
over all his art merely to cash in on, consummate,
and materialize his theories. He might kill.
Think of that.
But let me not to the marriage of true minds
admit predicaments. If Frank Siebert doesn't
cultivate the humanitarian graces, he certainly
cultivates flowers. Was denken Sie? Quien
sobe? Et la! A heart that goes out to leaf and
tendril cannot be adamant to vein and artery.
A man whose ground-swell ideal goes deep
enough to include xylem and phloem, cannot, I
state, be wholly destitute of the bowels of Com-
passion. And may I add. Sir, that I am having
a hell of a swell time writing this letter.
To conclude briefly with pertinent facts.
Siebert likes Indian archaeology. Siebert hurdles
on the track team. Siebert likes to work in the
laboratory. Siebert is a gangling youth, but has
faith, hope, and charity. Can you say the same
Yours awfully truly,
H. Hatnall Pink, Dean
FRANK THOMAS SIEBERT, JR.
127 MERBROOK LANE MERION, PA.
Born 1912. Entered from Episcopal Academy In 1930.
Track Squad (1, 2, 3, 4), Numerols (3), Chemistry Club
(1, 2, 3, 4), Field Club (2, 3, 4).
page eighty. three
ARTHUR GREGG SINGER, JR.
4661 LEIPER STREET PHILADELPHIA, PA.
Bom 1912. Entered from Frankford High School in 1930.
Spoon CommilteSi Baseball Squad (1, 2, 3, 4), Numerals
(3), H (4); Basketball Sqoad (1, 2), Numerals C3)i Enoineering
Club (2, 3, 4); Vice-President (4)i Band (1, 2)j Corporation
MR. BUGGER SINGER
HAVERFORD COLLEGE ■ HAVERFORD, PA.
Mr. Daniel C. Roper, Sec'y
U. S. Department of Commerce
Woshington, D. C.
I understand that the Bureau of Fisheries is in
your department. If so, you are the people I
would like to talk to. My personal ambition is
to have installed in the Federal Government o
Bureau of Buggeries. If fishes have fisheries,
certainly bugs may have buggeries. That is only
logic, pure and simple.
For the head of this new/ bureau I recommend
my roommate/ I am modest myself and would only
desire to be Administrator of Firecrackers and
Water Fights. The directing personnel of this
bureau should be extremely youthful in order to
carry on the necessary arduous labors entailed
in thinking up novel and annoying buggeries to
be carried out. We two are admirably fitted for
the jobs in that direction, being very youthful
indeed — for reference, write to the Haverford
Students' Council or the Hsverford News.
I would suggest that the new bureau be called
BIA. The government has already installed the
NRA, ECPC, FCA, CWA, CCC, AAA, HOLC,
and the new part of the "alphabetical soup"
could be called, as I said before, the BIA —
Buggery Inception Administration. Win Smith
and I have already thought of a slogan from these
three letters out of which and around which a
propagandical poster might be drawn. The
slogan is, "Bia firecracker and blow up the
whole contraption." This attention to the smallest
details shows how thoroughly we have delved
into the plan we propose.
Haverford graduated me as an engineer/ Win
is planning to be a preacher of no mean repute
for "slinging it," so you may be sure, Mr. Secretary,
that our plan is both technically, and spiritually
I must close now since someone outside my
room is yelling "Fire," the call to arms that tingles
the blood of every true Bugocrat.
Haywire Sweater Co.
Dear Mr. President:
My name is Bruce Smith, BRUCE DONNAN
SMITH and I am a student at Haverford College
In Pennsylvania. I am quite an athlete at Haver-
ford, participating in almost all of the Major
Sports and being an interested spectator to those
sports which are not fortunate enough to have
me participating In them. All the coaches will
gladly make mention to you of my athletic skill
and ability. I am directly connected with the
Football, Basketball and Baseball Teams and only
the other day told the coaches that I was undoubt-
edly the Greatest Athlete ever to attend Haver-
ford. Besides that I play Bridge and even Mr.
Culbertson says I am a card. (Do you gel it,
Now, Mr. President, what I want to write to
you about Is one of your sweaters. Since i cm a
Varsity man, I hove many Varsity Insignia to
display. At the present time I am wearing two
letters on the front, two on the back and one on
the front inside. I have a set of numerals sewed
on under the right arm-pit. Now, I wear this
sweater practically all the time so that the boys
will know I am an athlete and of late I hove
noticed that one of the sleeve's knitted threads
has started to give. Mr. President, isn't there some
way your company will make amends for this
I am also connected with other activities at
College, namely the Day-Students League/ The
Bridge Playing Club/ Howard Comfort's Latin
Guild/ Haverford College Bounders Club/ Attend-
Every-Dance Club/ Be-a-Big-Shot Union/ and The
l-Am-for-Smith Propaganda Society, among many
others. I am well known to all the boys and played
an Important port in the celebration of the Cen-
tenary of the College. Naturally, I put your
sweater to the most severest of tests and am a
splendid ad for the Haywire Sweater Company.
Please let me know, Mr. President, as soon as
possible, your Intentions.
B. D. S.
P. S. I am a devil with the women, too, Mr.
BRUCE DONNAN SMITH
2715 OVERBROOK TERRACE
MERIOIM GOLf MANOR ARDMORE, PA.
Born 1912. Entered from Haverford Sctiool in 1930.
Football Squad (1, 2), H (3), Numerals (4)i Boseboll Man-
ager (4); Basketball Junior Varsity (1, 2, 3); Centenary
WILLIAM WHARTON SMITH
535 CHURCH LANE GERMANTOWN, PA.
Bom 1912. Entered from Germantown Friends School in 1930.
Track, Freshman Team, Numerals (2, 3, 4),- Chemistry Club
(1, 2, 3, 4)i Mathematics Club (4).
What time are you coming home this week-end?
I've got a couple of your Main Line debs on the
line, and you're in for a sure-fire evening. Save
all your energies — let Pop fume a day or so. Of
course I know the aim of your life is to make good
in your track efforts, but for the sake of our passion
flowers, take just one day off. Don't take your
lap on the track this time.
I stopped by to see you last Sunday. Asked a
Freshman where you lived, but he needed a
graphic description before realizing you were
one of the denizens of Quaker hieaven. I said
you were the Quake with the convict haircut,
the beaming smile, the brownish brown suit, and
the pigeon-toed bouncing walk. Then he caught
on. "Oh I know who you mean. I generally see
him walking down to the Chem. Lab., but some-
times I see him walking back."
Now I know where you spend your time. How
do you get along at Newport in the summers
without a laboratory'' Your sister told me you
go sailing all day, and steer by slide-rule. She
said your suit has a specially designed slide-rule
pocket. Then when you want to know what time
it is or which way the wind is blowing, your
instrument is right handy.
But you can leave your slide-rule behind this
time, Smeese my boy. You won't need it with
these Main Liners, so let Norm play with it. He'll
wonder at your leaving it behind, but he always
wonders about your week-ends. Sometimes I
even do myself. Your nonchalance is utterly
mystifying, but perhaps someday I'll be able to
figure you out.
This note is getting longer and longer, so I'll
stop and let you finish that Math, problem. Let
me know when to expect you.
EAST HARTFORD CONN.
r, I L 9-4-33
You needn't put on airs just because Miles
traded me in, me, a perfectly good 1921 Franklin
whose speedometer was just about to turn 200,000
and who hod three trips across the Continent to
my credit, for you, you a 1933 Plymouth with noth-
ing but o shiny coat of paint to recommend you.
With all your polish you haven't got Miles a new
girl yet. He dropped the last one because of
her paint job, so watch your step.
Yes, he learned o lot in me. I helped him all
I could. I've coughed and died as though I
hadn't seen a gallon of gas for a month, even
though the gauge said Ji and there was an
emergency gallon beside. I nearly split a gasket
one night. She said, "Oh, Miles, please don't
park here." And then "Oh, Miles, please don't
park." And then "Oh, Miles, please don't."
And So On.
On the other hand I've run five miles with
nothing but a faint odor in my gas tank when
we've been off on trips to Vermont or to Stanford.
We had great fun roaming back country roads
that you'll not see till a little of your pertness is
worn off. He knew I could take it and believe
me he put it on. I suppose you think you've seen
life on your trips to get hunks of rock for his
geology course. Never mind, youngster, you'll
learn. Write me some time and tell me how you
like Mount Mansfield. Of course all your weak-
nesses are congenital and you can't help it. But that
makes it all the more incredible to me that Miles
should pull such a boner. After all he's supposed to
have benefited by a four-year Engineering course.
While he was under my management all went
well. He stuck to the road. Since he lost his
head, he's got some crazy notion about osteopathy
instead of aviation. If he thinks he can jack
peoples bones around according to rope and
pulley principles he learned in College, he hasn't
learned as much anatomy as I thought he had.
Well, drop me a line v^hen he trades you in
or a car. I'll be very interested.
Your Respectable Predecessor,
HORATIO MILES SNYDER
GREENSBORO • VERMONT
Bom 1911. Entered from Leiand Stanford Jr. University in 1931.
Cap and Gown Comrritfeei Glee Club (3), Engineering
Clob (2, 3, 4).
MATTHEW WYNN STANLEY
PARK MANSIONS PIHSBURGH, PA.
Bom 1912. Entered from Shady Side Academy in 1930.
Soph-Senior Dance Committee; Junior Prom Committee;
Chairman Senior Prom Committee; Track Squad (1, 2); News
Board (1, 3); Secretary (3); Haverhrdhn Board (1, 2, 3, 4),
Business Manager (4); News Service (2, 3, 4), Editor (4);
Football Manoger (4); Golf Manager (4); Glee Club (3, 4);
International Relations Club (3); Founders Club (3, 4); Vice-
President, Secretary (4); Centenary Committee (4).
ALUMINUM COMPANY OF U. S. A.
Who's Who Publishing Co.
New York, N. Y.
I am astonished to find that one has to pay to
get his name in your yearly publication. But I
am truly angered to find that I must pay double to
customary price because my activities take up so
much more room than the ordinary man's. Enclosed
please find the check, however/ you have a
monopoly on this sort of thing, and n\y name must
There are several mistakes in your listings which
I desire to correct. For your convenience I will
write out the activities which you have published
incorrectly. The Sounders' Club of Pittsburgh is
the thing I cherish most highly, and you have
omitted it altogether. To be in that club one must
have several important offices, a host of minor
posts, and, above all, a character above repute
for the two years prior to admittance. In order
to join that organization I have taken on a great
many little jobs for which I am now paying double
to have listed in your book.
The other corrections as corrected are: Business
Manager of the Pittsburgh Literary Magazine/
Manager of the Pittsburgh National League
Football Team/ Secretary of the Pittsburgh Press
Association (for two months or less)/ Manager
of the Pittsburgh-Mellon Golf Team/ one of the
founders of the Pittsburgh International Relations
Club/ and founder of the Pittsburgh Anti-War
If you will pardon the intrusion, I would sug-
gest that you delete from your book the name of
that fabricator who wrote "Mellon's Millions."
I thank you.
You wouldn't want to buy some aluminum
would you? I thought not.
P. S. Almost forgot — be sure to include Grand
High Master Penna. Gamblers' Association.
WILLIAM J. BURNS DETECTIVE AGENCY
Case— No. L9-H34
Name — Samuel Taylor
Address — God knows, chief, I can't find it,
History — This man is wanted for one and only
one simple reason. That reason, chief, is that his
classmates at Haverford College would like to
see if there really is such a man. And if there Is
such a person as Samuel Taylor (calling all cars)
they would like to know [ust who he is. There
are two conflicting reports concerning his identity,
both of which are very plausible though neither
have any real basis in facts. One theory is that he
is the ghost of Bayard Taylor who also come from
Kennet Square, Pa., and uses Sam merely as a
clever alias. This theory receives support from
all those who have made a study of American
Literature, for to these people Bayard come very
suddenly into the midstream of American Literature
and then as quickly disappeared. The other theory
is that he never came to College at all, but Mr.
Chase thinks he did and still has his mail sent to
No. 35 Lloyd Hail, and has a seat reserved for
him at every meal.
FACTS: re. — Samuel Taylor
(A) Subject likes blonde women as well as he
(B) Intends to go to a medical school when he
evaporates from Haverford.
(C) Was host to a lot of tea-parties in his Fresh-
man year, with real brass kettles and all sorts of
chic accessories to serve the steaming liquid.
(D) Subject walks about the campus as if in a
deep trance, looks up once in a while with a
faint glimmer of intelligence.
REMARKS: Those facts are pretty good, chief, for
never having seen subject nor found anybody else
Agent No. 34
JOHN SAMUEL TAYLOR
359 NORTH UNION STREET KENNEn SOUARE, PA.
Bom 1912. Entered from Kenneft Higli Scliool in 1930.
page eighty -nine
HARCOURT NEWELL TRIMBLE, JR.
1307 BEECHWOOD BOULEVARD
Bom 1912. Entered from Shady Side Academy in 1930.
Chairman Junior Prom Committee (3)j Chairman Football
Dance Committee (4); Track, Freshman Team; Soccer Manager
(4); Record Board (4); Haverlordian Board, Advertising
Manager (3, 4) International Relations Club (3).
To The Editor of the Nation:
All these dirty old capitalists give 'me a pain
in the place where pains are really trenchant.
There they are in their beautiful homes (those
Mellons in Pittsburgh are the worst) while we are
forced to live in one or two rooms. There they
are in their magnificent cars equipped with
luxurious radios, while we poor unfortunates
must walk. Are they blind that they see not our
poverty, our want and our misery? Are they deaf
that they hear not our heart-rending grumblings,
our soul-twisted prayers to unheedful Gods, the
whimperings of our hungry children?
I have slaved for three years (maybe it's four,
if so, it is worse yet) and what do I get — nothing
but God-forsaken managership of soccer. Can
we not arouse the masses, compel them to do
something about their down-trodden condition?
Must we remain dumb and humble as the beasts
in the field, must we, I ask you? Think of those
people working in glassware factories/ my heart
goes out to them especially. And their bosses,
what do they do, but go out and play the stock
This whole civilization is about to crumble/
war is inevitable/ laissez-faire economics are
running rampant as is sex and other sins — Socialism,
Communism and Marxism will help this deplorable
state of affairs, because they will do away with
rugged individualism. I may be sort of rambling
in this letter, but the strong force of righteous
indignation is coursing through my blood. What
I want for this country is dames and beer for
everyone/ a car with a radio for everyone/ and
a girl like my Anne for everyone — Heil Stalin,
Lenin, Trotsky and Norman Thomas — the heroes
H. N. Trimble
-, Mi q ii . iiy PI y ay y_>T .»T>^y ^ i . aii^ ^ i ^^ .4^»^i^iaai^mmif^fg^ffi
(This is a scrap of a letter Found in an old fire-
place. The edges were badly charred but the
main part was legible. Anyway, this is the part
that interests us.)
. . . after all these months you should be set.
Of course, your school is not as splendid as my
alma murder, Bryn Mawr. Anyway, being at
Bryn Mawr gives us the first crack at those pos-
itively ducky boys from Haverford, and you know
how thot . . . (here a part was burned) ... to
us, Marge. Speaking of the Quake College,
reminds me of the cutest boy I met there last week.
George J., you know that . . . (here another
part was destroyed by flame but it must have
been awful for look what follows!) . . . God
forgive me, took me to A Dance there and one
of the dances traded was with a darling little
boy named Tripp . . . Edwin Prescolt Tripp.
Marge, he is divine. Such a little dear, scarcely
five — five with the cunningest, wavy hair. I
understand he is from Falmouth (George, the cat,
told me Falmouth is nothing more than a water-
tank town in Mass.) and that he is a darn good
pitcher for the college nine. He is a little bit shy
and has the darlingest twang, saying "whaaaatter"
for water, "tyeeer" for tire and such things.
Marge, and can TFHAT boy dance!!
I like him loads and he is so funny! FHe enter-
tained a crowd of us by imitating a college Prof,
named Bones or Jones, I think the name is. Every-
body who knows the Prof, said it was perfect.
F-|is friends tell me he is interested in Art, spending
much of his time at a place called THE BIJOU.
I am a stranger around here so I do not know
what kind of art they have there, but. Marge, it
DOES show he has ambition, doesn't it. Just
think, a young fellow devoting himself to Art.
He has the ducklest little roadster and we . . .
(this part was obliterated) ... so please do not
tell any of the others but, you should see his
HAIRY chest. O Marge, I . . . (the carbon-
charred paper ended here at what might have
interested us even more!!)
EDWIN PRESCOTT TRIPP, JR.
AMIN STREET FALMOUTH, MASS.
Born 1912. Entered from Lawrence High School in 1930.
Closs Secrefory (3); Blazer Committee (3), Ivy Committee
(3)j Baseball, H (1, 2, 3, 4).
WILLIAM JOSEPH WAGNER
277 WEST END AVENUE NEW YORK CITY
Born 1913. Entered from Townsend Harris Hall High School
Freshman Track Teom Squad (1, 2); Cricket Squad (3, 4);
Cheer Leader (3, 4)/ News Board (1, 2, 3, 4); Advertising
Manager (2, 3); Business Manager (4), Record Boord; Glee
Club (2); Centenary Committee (4).
SURE-FIRE AUTOMOBILE LOAN CO.
777555 We'M-Gel-You-Yet Lane
Mr. William Wagner
We address you in the plural, "sirs," because
surely no one man could give so many different
promises. To be frank, we need that little sum
advanced to you to buy a car. You said "when
the time comes, Wagner will take care of it."
Well, well, well, the time has come, and come
again, and also fugited, and still what do we get
— nothing but smiles, and pleasant (?) slaps on
And about our secretary (nice blonde, swell
dancer, and all that, we admit) we really pay
her to work here and for us. We have added
$49.52 for the time she gave to you instead of her
work/ after all, Mr. Wagner, someone has to
get money for it, and since you did not give her
any, you might as well pay her employers. We try
to be fair and square, but we are not running a
taxi dance hall.
Your last letter (which came to us something
like three months agO/ore you actually still living?)
mentioned the possibility of accepting something
instead of money for the debt. Nothing doing!
We don't want the car you bought (even if it
were still intact) nor do we want our suits cleaned
and pressed/ nor do our wives wont dates with
a former Brown gridiron star/ nor do we want
to buy your loose-haired wolf-hound (he's been
here for three weeks board free now, end we are
getting a little tired of it — but we'll write another
letter about that or else sic Macintosh on you.)
We have written to your father, but he says
he can't bother with your troubles what with
Tammany getting overthrown, and everybody
turning vegetarians and all.
Please may we hove a check to show us
Sure-Fire Automobile Loan Co.
per Dolores Delight,
I had a strange dream, or as Chaucer would
put it, a "streange drame. " Edwin While ap-
peared, walking into a fortune teller's tent.
She spoke to him, promising to tell him of his past
so that he might believe her forecast of the
"Look at me and I shall read in your eyes what
your profession is." At this point a slide rule
tumbled self-consciously from his pocket. "Ah,
my spirit tells me you are an engineer and if
you are an engineer, you are an interested
and hard working member of the Engineering
Club." Unable to control itself any longer, a
large smooth egg with eyes and nose and a
heavy beard waved an emphatic affirmation of
this tact from the back of a long store counter
on which electric Imotors were humm ng, "The
Old Spinning Wheel. '
"Look at me again and I shall tell you what
musical instrument you play." Strange to say
Edwin snatched a violin bow from beneath his
coat and began to pick his teeth with it. "Ah,
you ore a violinist, but not a good one. Look at
me again and I will tell you what you long to do."
But seeing the mast of a sailboat slicking from his
pocket, she went right on talking. "Ah, you long
to go to sea and sail a boat. You are a sailor and
a dreamer at heart. Beware the Jabberwockey
of Math and Science.
"Look at me and I will tell you what you did
last summer." At this point a T-square and a large
pair of dividers began to caper wildly around the
floor and finally quieted down beside the slide
rule which edged nervously away from them,
managing at lost to hide under a book of multipli-
cation tables. "Ah, I see you were a draughts-
man. Look at me and I will tell you what girls
you took to what dances." Strangest of all there
was no movement of anything. Even the slide rule
stopped squeaking. "Ah, I see you ore afraid of
the ladies. Do not be so. Never write anything
to them and you will be absolutely safe."
EDWIN CHANDLEE WHITE
185 WARRENTON AVENUE
Born 1913. Entered from Wesllown School in 1930.
Engineering Club (1, 2, 3, 4).
JOHN CYRUS WILSON
323 RUGBY ROAD BROOKLYN, N. Y.
Born 1912. Entered from George School in 1930.
Senior Prom Committee/ Baseball, H (1, 2, 3, 4), Football
Squad, H (2, 3)i News Board (3, 4), Sports Editor (4), Store
James B. Eastman
Coordinator oF Railroads
18th and Pennsylvania Avenues
Washington, D. C.
In response to your request for my opinions on
railroad coordination and possible further improve-
ments in train service I enclose some suggestions
which I consider very worth while. It is with great
pleasure that I realize favorable reports have
reached you concerning my speech on railroad
stabilization in the Doll's Ec 9 course.
Here are my suggestions:
(1) Practically free train fare from Brooklyn,
N. Y. to Troy, N. Y., and faster service between
those two cities, because when I want to get
to Troy I generally want to get there in a hurry.
(2) Same as No. 1, only with Sandy Springs,
Md., substituted for Troy.
(3) Drop the Prince Plan. My sentiments on the
Boston financiers' proposal are summed up by
saying that you can spell his name two ways.
(4) Continuous movie shows on oil through
trains, the more the better. I see as many as five
a week, but please, no ballet dances!
(5) Some sort of athletic event on each short
run/ I have swell plans for railroad cor palestras,
stadiums and swimming pools.
(6) Burlesque shows — not too arty — on some
through trains. This is, of course, a very radical
(7) A Magazine Library on ever/ train, includ-
ing all the smutty pulps, and the wild west pulps,
also Red Book and Colliers. There should also
be easy chairs, the kind where your rump almost
touches the floor and your knees hit your chin.
(8) Of course there should be radios and cross
word puzile books at every seat, numerous
bars, plenty of free Chesterfields, a golf course,
plenty of French novels, and innumerable Sunday
These suggestions are purely personal and are
the outgrowth of much intensive perusal of dry
time-tables and out-of-the-way statistics of any
kind — and some experience in the first two sug-
gestions at least.
Sincerely thine (I am a Quake)
John C. Wilson
Here we Find an imaginary letter by Bernard
Shaw to his beloved Ellen Terry
Dearest, darling Ellen:
What a week! nay, a fortnight!
Just after my last letter was posted, when I
was on the point of foiling asleep, I suddenly
recollected that your eyes were not strong and
that I had been inflicting a ream of liny crabbed
writing on you. Forgive me: man is by nature
I hove read carefully through that copy, but,
worse luck, I must either write hurriedly or miss
the post, as some people have arrived here and
I have to spend a lot of time in mending punctures
in female bicycle tyres. Therefore, brief and
blunt 1 must be.
After all your mentioning and praising I was
naturally on the lookout for that fellow Winne
the other night when I was at the party after
Doll's House. He has probably changed a lot
since you last saw him. I introduced myself and
we were on very friendly terms before the evening
was on the start. I chided him as best I could about
keeping all his expenses in a budget as, darling
Ellen, you wrote. However, he has changed in
that respect for he swore up and down that he
gave up the "silly" habit after he had been in
college some time. No: I've no courage; I always
am and always have been as timid as a church-
mouse and accordingly, 1 did not seek to find the
answer to your question as to why he spends so
much time in the Physics courses, when he is so
much better in other things. 1 gathered from his
freely-flowing discourse that he plans to enter
Medical School someday. Is that right?
He was right smartly interested in your acting
and so forth and, of course, 1 painted you in the
purple. I notice he wears a slave bracelet. A
friend tells me it is a token from one of the fair
sex (poor boy!) and from which he never parts
himself. Ellen, you never told me he is such a
Plainly and bluntly, darling, college has changed
him from the sweet boy he was when he first
entered (as you tell me) to a sophisticate. And,
darling, did you ever hear him swear? From your
letters I understood he never did such! Anyway,
we took the tram home together and I was pleased
to meet one of your friends.
Night, you gorgeous thing,
CHARLES KNICKERBACKER MERRILL WINNE
151 CHESTNUT STREET
ALBANY, N. Y.
Born 1913. Entered from The Albany Academy in 1930.
Senior Prom Committee, Band (1, 2), Instrumental Club
(1, 2); Cop and Bells (2, 3, 4), Stage Manager Cap and Bells
Play (3, 4), Play Committee (4), Kecord Board.
FREDERICK HAMILTON WRIGHT
2134 WYOMING AVENUE WASHINGTON, D. C.
Bom 1912. Entered from Western High School in 1930
Commencement Day Committee; Radio Club (1, 2); Math-
ematics Club (4); Liberal Club (4); Corporotion Scholar (2).
Dear P. B. Shelley:
It is with the deepest sense of tragedy that I
realize that I have been born one hundred and
ten years too late. In this world of cold, hard,
facts, great idealists of our calibre cannot find
suitable environments in which to express our
innate potentialities to the highest. Even at
Haverford, where esthetes are looked upon
with tolerance and compassion, I have never
been fully appreciated. I have cultivated a vague
and ethereal attitude of mind, rather maddening,
I understand, to more practical souls, such as
professors who like papers to be handed In on
time, or approximately so. This chronic lateness
is due in part to the largeness of my ideals.
A man's reach should exceed his grasp
Or what's a heaven for?
So I have gone through college, taking six, seven,
eight courses, honors work, and never doing
justice to more than three of them. In fact, one
course proved so interesting that I didn't bother
to take the mid-year exam, so that I could study
over the summer and take the course again. Yes,
I agree with you, that's idealism.
Instead of a Venetian gondola, I find a Packard
touring car quite as efficacious in achieving
romantic effects, affections, and affectations.
Another one of my poses is that of a cricketer.
("Cricketeers have hairy ears" — some rhyme,
eh boss?) as a matter of fact — most abhorrent
as facts are — I really took to cricket like a duck
to water. Now my only concern is not to get
ducks or dunk in my tea.
Having a brilliant mind, I have yet to reach
the depths of writing such poetry as Roos's and
Hoover's. However, I am beginning to realize
that only through the medium of verse is it possible
to give real expression to all within me.
Had we been born at the same time, we might
have changed the world — separated by a century,
the forces of idealism are dissipated and nullified.
The lime is out of joint, O cursed spite
That ever I was born to set it right
Nay, come, let's go together.
.. ' 'V? ' '!;^ ! t- j -y . ' . ' ."t";!,'!;,. ' .
Mr. Elmer J. Babbitt
Pres. Rotary International
New York City, N. Y.
Dear Mr. Babbitt:
If the Rotarians have been hard hit by the
depression, and have lost many boosters because
of serious disillusionments, we offer you a man
that will take the place of thousands of them.
In fact, you wouldn't need a single other booster,
if you hired this one — Willard M. Wright, Jr., strict
believer in Sportsmanship, Cleanliness, Order-
liness, Capitalism, and The Purity-Of-Most-
Jusf those few qualifications are enough to
make him a thirty-third degree Rotarian upon
application, are they not? AH, but besides those
the boy is really clever. Willard knows innumerable
cord tricks which will come in handy when your
meetings get dull. And he can always laugh,
^ith an extraordinarily enthusiastic guffaw at
any of the attempted witticisms you speakers pull
off. One trouble that we find with him is that
he may laugh when there is absolutely nothing
at all to laugh at, like sometime when someone
is speaking on the holiness of the after-life, or
something else really serious like. We are gen-
erally pretty fortunate in staving off such momentary
outbursts by telling him that he is not setting a
good example and he is such a motherly soul and
hales so to lead others into sin and wickedness
that he often stops laughing immediately.
One of his greatest attributes is his geniality
and ability to bulldoze people into believing
he really is somebody, and not just good ole' Bill.
The two things which make this possible are his
genial smile (it literally goes from one ear to the
other) and his graceful dancing, hlis favorite
foreign country is Russia, about which he knows
three words in Russian and a lot of things young
lovers did under the Czars. Please give him a
job, or else he will be driving trucks filled with
dry ice or selling neckties/ 1 am afraid of such a
thing because it would hurt the fair name of our
H. Batball Town
WILLARD MOORE WRIGHT
1828 NORTH 13TH STREET PHILADELPHIA, PA.
Bom 1912. Entered from Episcopal Academy in 1930.
Class Doy Committee, Blozer Committee (3); Footboll Dance
Committee (4), Student Extension Committee (1, 2, 3, 4);
Traclc, Freshman Teom; Football Sauod (1), H (2, 3), Numerols
(4); Monoger ot Cop and Bells (4).
CHARLES HALSTEAD CLOUKEY
BORN . . . APRIL 15, 1912
DIED . . SEPTEMBER 28, 1931
GEORGE BREIDENHART ALLEN
BORN . . . MAY 29, 1913
DIED . . . AUGUST 8, 1932
FRANCIS WHARTON STORK
Meadowbfook Lane, Chestnut Hill, Pa.
EDWIN CHOUTEAU PERKINS
CUTHBERT ALTAMONT PIHER
CHARLES SCUDDER BARRETT
Lowrencevjile, N. J.
HARRY EDMUND RICE
DOUGLAS SELBY VANCE
JOHN SHARPLESS EDWARDS
Walnut Lane, HoverFord, Pa.
JAMES A. MAC COLL
Quaker Ridge, New Rochelle, N. Y.
JOHN P. DES JARDINS
7 Becket Avenue, Rochelle Park, N. J.
OnHO GERARD HELDRING-BYE
901 Harvard Avenue, Swarthmore, Pa.
ROBERT WILMOT COLOMY
JAMES HUSTON COWAN
WILLIAM WORCESTER DORMON
JOSEPH GORDON EARP WILLIAM BENSON NICHOLAS PAUL HARMON WORCESTER
ISO Greeves Slieel, Kane, Pa. 67J Putman Avenue, Btooklyn, N. Y.
JOHN LEWIS GROSS, JR.
DAVID JUSTIN HOLDEN
JAMES BARCLAY LEEDS
JOHN BENJAMIN MC CLINTOCK
RICHARD MUNN SUFFERN
CHARLES WILLIAM HART
6S5 Lexington Place. Washington. D. C.
i"2k *** »^
page one hundred one
GRADUATE STUDENTS . . . SEATED— Sorgant, HIatt, Shafef, Hole . . . STANDING— Biidger. Mekeel, Parsons
James Matthew Bridger
Wilmer Baily Clement
Franklin Kirkbride Fite
Edwin Peelle Hiatt
Francis Doon Hole
Arthur Jacob Mekeel
David Henry Parsons, Jr.
John Romoine Sargent
Mervin Cecil Shafer
Hugh Hayes Aikens, Jr.
William Lesher Azpell, Jr.
David Hinrichs Bates
Howard Sloan Bevan, Jr.
Clifton McCousland Bockstoce
Arthur Brenlon Boggs
William Robert Bowden, Jr.
Paul Willits Brown, Jr.
Benjamin Bartram Cadbury
John Barrett Christopher
John Adams Church, III
Meredith Bright Colkel, Jr.
Charles Blankley Conn, Jr.
John Campbell DuFfield
David Dennis Dunn
George Elliott Dutton, Jr.
John Habersham Elliott
Woodruff Jones Emien
Ernest Mervyn Evans
Frederick Erwin Foerster
Richard Edward Griffith
William Henry Harmon, Jr.
Richard Wesley Hires
Sidney Hollander, Jr.
William Nathan Huff
Robert Franklin Hunsicker
James Boird Case
William George Kirkland
Edward Charles Kunkle, Jr.
Jerome Henry Lentz
Edward Joseph Manning, Jr.
Edward Wayne Marshall, Jr.
Edward Jones Matlock
Jackson Kenneth Matthews
Edward Hommel McGinley
William Thomas Mcintyre, Jr.
William Harrison Mechling, II
Allen Roy Memhard, Jr.
Harry Chamberlain Meserve
Edward Ross Miller
Vincent Putnam Morgan
Charles Thomas Nicholson, Jr.
William Benson Nicolas
Fred Fletcher Patten
Kenneth Eccles Paul
Samuel Potter, Jr.
Alan Robert Pretzfeld
John Biddle Rhoads
Russel Warner Richie
Kimberley Sidney Roberts
Frederic Noble Rolf
Rowland Greenough Skinner
Charles Graff Smith
JUNIOR CLASS, Continued
John Winslow Smith
Richard Reed Smith
Martin Pullinger Snyder
Glenn Cameron Stayer
Alfred Gilbert Steer, Jr.
Philip Pendleton Steptoe, Jr.
William Sabin Stoddard
Francis Joseph Stokes, Jr.
William Hammond Totem
Robert Stockton Trenbath
James Ernest Truex
Clarence Bradley Watkins
Henry Dean Wellington
Alexander Cooper Wood,
Paul Harmon Worcester
Elijah Dale Adkins, Jr.
Robert Crozer Alexander
Robert Wilson Baird, Jr.
Joseph Barton, Jr.
Henry Corneau Beck
Thomas Ralston Bevan
George Baruch Bookman
Samuel Lippincott Borton, II
John Briggs, III
Donald Wesley Brous
Jonathan Allison Brown
Thomas Downing Brown
William Richard Brown, III
Daniel Francis Coogan, Jr.
Ben Thomson Cowles
William Avery Crawford
Ellis Irving Curley
Marion Bostwick Davis, Jr.
John Robert Diehl
Arthur Sim Dulaney, Jr.
David Cope Elkinlon
Edward Sifton Evans
Francis Cope Evans
Grant Clippinger Eraser
William Reed Fry, Jr.
Lafayette Ross Garner
Robert Smith Gawthrop, Jr.
Milton Eager Glessner, Jr.
John Nichols Goodridge
Howard William Green
Allan Clyde Hale, Jr.
Henry Strong Huntington, III
Robert Midgley Hutchinson
Arthur Raymond Kane, Jr.
Dean Carey Klevan
Robert Ellis Lewis
Howard Thomas Lodge, Jr.
SOPHOMORE CLASS, Continued
William Herman Loesche, Jr.
William Alexander Macan, II
Lewis Bach Maier
David Kempton Maxheld
David Pollock McCune, ill
Samuel Stuart McNeary
J. Don Miller, Jr.
Park Hays Miller, Jr.
Warren Brooke Morgan, Jr.
Charles Christopher Morris, II
Lloyd Emery Morris, Jr.
Ralph Christian Most
Peter Kimball Page
John Lindley Parker
Edward Owen Parry
Henry Frazer Parry
Harry Theodore Paxton
James Watson Pearce, Jr.
Frank Gardiner Pearson
James Gird wood Peirce
John Sebastian Pugliese
Joseph Dixon Purvis, Jr.
William Rothermel Reynolds
Albert Lyon Scott, Jr.
Wayne Sensenig, Jr.
Thomos Kite Shorpless
William Edward Sheppard, II
James Olson Sloss
Caleb Allen Smith
Walter Tausig Spaeth
Allen Woodruff Stokes
Edmund Moore Taylor
Joseph Hooton Taylor
George Brinton Thomas, Jr.
William Francis Tiernan, Jr.
Henry Llewellyn Tomklnson
John Van Brunt, Jr.
Hubert Mayo Vining
Joseph Kenneth Weitzenkorn,
Alexander Coxe Williams, Jr.
Robert Benjamin Wolf
Charles Wislar Yeorsley
Ellis Bordiner Youtz
Charles Jackson Allen, Jr.
William Williams Allen, III
Howard Aston Andrews
Thomas Seth Barker, Jr.
Kenneth Antrim Beck
Sidney Willis Blackman
William Henry Bond
Robert Clarke Bone, Jr.
Walter John Bragdon, Jr.
Robert Franklin Brattan, III
Oliver George Brown
John Abbot Cantrell
James Gray Carr, Jr.
Joseph Reed Carson
Stephen Grellet Cory
William Wilkie Chambers, Jr.
Richard Melvin Clayton
William Ward Condit
Thomas Armour Conway, III
Thomas Norton Cook
James Albert Dailey, Jr.
William Herbert Doudt
Henry Sandwith Drinker, III
William Morris Dugdale
Thomas Evans Edwards
Hans Bernhard Engelmonn
Bruce Hartung French
Henry Herman Freund, III
Daniel Chappell Frysinger
Allan Walton Gilmour, Jr.
Roger Louis GreiF
Roger Wisner Griswold, Jr.
Henry Clark Gulbrandson
Marshall Crapon Guthrie, Jr.
Roy Conrad Haverkern, Jr.
James Robert Harrison, Jr.
Edward Lupton Hawkins, Jr.
Charles Elmer Holzer, Jr.
James Dawson Hoover
Horn/ Samuel Hopper, II
Andrew Dickson Hunt, Jr.
Bryden Bordley Hyde
FRESHMAN CLASS, Continued
William Lawrence Kimber
Robert Henry Krieble
Horry Howard Kruener
Paul Grimley Kuntz
John Jacob Lawser
Robert Waltner Leibold
Boyd Conlin Lentz
John Ashby Lester, Jr.
Morris Albert Linton, Jr.
James Harrison Lockwood
John Brockie Lukens
Richard Barron McLaughlin
Ralph Henr/ McMohon
Frederick Johnson Morgan
William Newton Nelson, II
William Bullivant Nichols
Gregory Nicholas Nicholsky
George Norris, Jr.
Francis Edwin Nulsen
John Edward Osmanski
William Allen Polster
Samuel Sturgis Poorman
Edgar Moskedal Rector
Henry Dawson Riley
Joseph Tracy Rivers, Jr.
Peter Picord Rodman
Edward Hoffman Rosenberry
William Taussig Scott
Edward Bettle Scull
Leslie Birchard Seely, Jr.
Henri Cleret Seibert
Thomas Louis Shannon, Jr.
Richard Bailey Shoemaker
William Mason Stevens
Herbert William Taylor, Jr.
Michael Leonard French Taylor
Irving Telling, Jr.
Daniel Field Tillotson
James Wallace Van Cleave
Melvin Atwood Weightmon
Frederick Hawley Wheeler
Philip Martin Whitman
Carl Edward Wilbut
Stephen Vincent Wilking
Edmund Culberlson Wingerd
Joy Wesley Worral, Jr.
Frederick Dunstan Wright
page one hundred si
FRONT ROW Brown
THE RECORD BOARD
Richardson Loewenslein Haines Egleslon SECOND ROW Grerf Hoti
BACK ROW— Harjes Beaven Bowen Jones Wagner Stanley
Synthesized from the stuff men are
made of, this bewildered-appearing
collection of editors, assistant-editors,
photographers and Tll-have-done-by-
tomorrow" boys is responsible for
your Record Book. Procrastination, a
disease valiantly fought by Editor-in-
Chief Loewenstein, threatened to throve'
things for a while, but by prodding
on his temperamental stooges like a top
sergeant, he eventually Vi'on, for here
we are, aren't we?
BENJAMIN S. LOEWENSTEIN
THOMAS S. BROWN OLIVER F. EGLESTON
CHARLES M. BANCROFT ROBERT H, BEAVEN
LEWIS H, BOWEN ROBERT B. JONES
C. K. MERRILL WINNE
LEONARD L. GREIF, JR. ROBERT W. MCKEE
HENRY HOTZ, JR.
PHILIP B. RICHARDSON
WILLIAM H. HAINES, 3.d
ASA W. pons HARCOURT N. TRIMBLE, JR.
WILLIAM J. WAGNER
The old moral backbone of Haverford broke into print this year
for the first time in a long while by threatening to resign when its
authority was questioned. To be sure the occasion was only a
matter of snowballing and the culprit was just another one of the
boys who traipse around Lloyd. But then look at John Wilkes
and think how much trouble he started. Maybe we ought to be
thankful. Anyway our friends of the moral backbone may cut a
notch in their gun handle,- they won. They're in dead earnest
from now on, so be careful.
The college newspaper, containing all the old
news, some of the new news, sportslight, and
sidelights on campus activities, continues to be
the big activity machine of Haverford. it had
its twenty-fifth birthday this yeor, but the age
of twenty-five is purely chronological; the age
of Its members is considerably less. They work
pretty hard, and as you see, fill up a good-
Bancroft Stanley Egleston
Our magazine, the Haverfordian, at whose name every head is
bared and every heart does leap — our magazine, God bless it, with
Oliver Egleston at the helm, has sailed the dubious seas of college
literary taste for another year. The sails flapped a little when at
mid-ocean a change of pilots took place, and there were not
enough old salts to put over another chapbook. But issues
have appeared regularly, and in spite of the usual mud-slinging
from the News, the boys have served their Muse as honestly as
All the news from our campus that might provoke
interest elsewhere reached the outside world
through the h-iaverford Press Bureau. From the
exchange material printed in the "College World"
we suspect that most of this college news consists
of quips and cracks and wanton wiles. However,
this organization, revamped and renamed this
year, is one of the few campus activities with
Coogan Rodman Hole
Jones Beaven Almore
The Instrumental Club, which was getting to be a myth, suddenly popped into
existence again this year. Hunt Jones, the wand wielder, sweated and
agonized to get his young band cf musicians to keep practicing and managed
to get them to do their stuff at four of the concerts, including the brilliant hHorne
Concert. Brilliant it was, and made the Glee Club have reason to feel proud,
especially after the difficulties they encountered this year. One of these diffi-
culties was the dearth of tenors (so masculine this college seems to be) and
another was the cruel accident suffered by Gene Hogenauer, which necessitated
Bob Almore's stepping into the breach as leader for a few weeks. Atmore's
solo hits and other special features mode it an excellent season, and a hard one
for next year's boys to beat.
This Club which has been mysteri-
ously silent for about five months
suddenly crashed through with
announcements about try-outs for
Three-Cornered Moon. The cast-
ing accomplished, there has been
little more for us to report,
although as we break into print,
v^e ore willing to moke a hypo-
thetical reminiscence and soy it
was a howfer of a success.
CAP AND BELLS
Full! Hoinei Hoganouat
Jones Beoven Wrigtit
MoiReld Rohrei Gibbs
This select group is still an unknown quantity to most of the
College — despite efforts at reform. There are banquets
and fight talks for the Rhinies, and a neat schedule telling
how to work your way In. Once in, the idea seems to be
Good Fellowship and a Further Tie with Haverford. But
most of us must say, with tears in our eyes, "Farewell, thou
art too dear for my possessing!"
Liberty and justice for all! Here is an array of students
seriously attached to the idealistic principles of better
human understanding. Under the chief instigator, Roger
Scattergood, the ensemble has been nourished on choco-
late-coated capsules of lectures, addresses, arguments
pro-and-con with frequent flights of white doves bearing
F. Evans C. Smith
Etiilnlon C. Smith
1 1 tS ^1
The Engineering Club gives our future bridge builders,
aviation experts and what-nots a chance to try their hand
at practical problems. These addicts of the slide-rule and
try-square make many trips to interesting manufacturing
plants and museums. They are frequently found around old
engines, drills, buzz-saws, etc.
Guided by capable professors, and activated by
promising student-chemists, this group has advanced
by leaps and bounds until it is one of the most vital
and most effective clubs on the campus. Oxygen,
nitrogen, hydrogen, test tubes, beakers and flasks
are the pre-requisites.
In the little bungalow at the corner of Railroad Avenue and Buck
Lone, some Haverford students, led by Joe Stokes, hove been
helping in the education and edification oF the younger inhabitants
of thaJ territory. Games have been refereed, various stunts have
been put on, and, as this book goes to press, we blush to say that
the Haverford Fencing Team gave an exhibition of its prowess.
The Field Club mokes interesting studies in bird-
lore and general out-door life. Several trips over
country trails and roads ore made during pleasant
weather. The Club makes special effort to arrange
for the actual feeding of migrating birds in the
appropriate seasons. Vive Audubon!
^■"JllJl III r:^".
Less allenlion to dramatics than in the past, and
concentration on literary efforts by Club members,
made the English Club more worthy its name this
year. Perhaps after a while, like some of the more
practical clubs, this Club will arrange for regular
outside speakers. Outsiders they will have to be,
for the present members don't relish preparing
informal lectures any more than they like to write
theses for English courses.
FRONT ROW— Efllerton, Spatlh, Tru«x, Hollander, Dunn
SECOND ROW—Sloddord, Brown, Blanc-Roos, Jonsi
THIRD ROW— Bowd*n, Robwti, Criffilh
Art Singer and Win Smith cheerfully direct a
gathering of students interested in religious ethics.
Christian men from prominent sects are frequent
visitors to meetings where they arbitrate many
discussions and aid in Bible study. The only hitch
IS that the two "Knights of Firecracker Abbey"
(apologies to Dove Wilson, '33) are torn between
the desire for destruction and their religious com-
pulsions. But God willing, religion will win.
FRONT ROW— Kiticnw, McN«ary, Smith, Slngtr, Curley
BACK ROW—Kunli, Stoddard, Fraiw, Dallcy
Though little known and less understood, this little
group of prospective Einsteins meet regularly, and
those that know say the discussions are interesting.
Here's hoping President Schmid remembers to use
English and not equations when addressing his less
FRONT ROW— Elliot, Smith, Schmid (PrMidwil), Huff, Haywood
BACK ROW— Walkini, Boggi, Scott, Aipoll
MATH CLUB ^
page one h u n d r e d s t x t e e n
THOSE RESPONSIBLE FOR IT ALL
FRONT ROW H. G. Russell, H. N. Trimble, Jr. (Choitman), M. W. Stanley
BACK ROW R. H. Beoven, R. O. B. Gibbs, W. H. Haines, III
Where, oh wheie can my little gitl be^
The traditional ivy is also present
The social high light in the undergraduate career of the class of '34 was reached
on May 5,1933, and was carried out with all the proper enthusiasm and sunny
weather. Shown herewith are the more notable, picturesque, and striking scenes
"Shick" Which One?
Paul Sabin contributed rhe Msential for the Prom
"Doc" Hyder and his Southernaires livened the Tea Dance
page one hundred twenty-two
'>.V,»/* '' •' '
Loe$che Gibbs Gaines
Ambler Hogenauer McNeary
Wilking Holier Evans
LeTolle (Assistant Coach)
Maserve (Assistant Manager)
Inaugurating the new coaching regime
headed by Roy Randall, hHaverford's 1933
eleven gained only a single victory in six
games, a 7-6 conquest of Wesleyan.
However, the true success of the season
con best be estimated in terms of the
foundations laid for larger returns in the
wins column next year.
Aside from Captain Dick Pleasants, bock-
field star, only three members of lost
season's squad will be absent, when the
first practice session is called this Fall.
These are Dick Gibbs and Bruce Smith,
both of whom were letter winners, and
Bill Wright, who received a numeral
Haverford 7 .
Haverford 7 .
. Earlham 6
. Susquehanna 6
. Wesleyan 6
, Hainilton 1 4
. Johns Hopkins 14
. Washington College 8
This liHle piggi* staved at home
A. Slolcet Rush Richardion
T. Richie (Captain)
T. Blown Hoti R. Richie
C. Brown Evans
Horman Tomkinson Shorpless
J. Stokes P. Brown
A record of five victories in eigfit starts
tells tfie story of Haverford's 1933 soccer
season. Headed by Captain Tom Ricfiie,
All-American forward, and including Ricfi-
ardson, Rusfi, Brown, Hotz, and Jones
among its Senior members, the local eleven
finisfied second in tfie Intercollegiate
league, losing only to tfie University of
Pennsylvania, cfiampions. A fiair-raising
2-1 conquest of Swartfimore concluded
onottier banner season.
Haverford 5 .
. Lafayette 1
Haverford 3 .
. Crescent 5
Haverford 4 .
Haverford 1 .
Haverford 4 .
. Navy 2
Haverford 2 .
. U. o( P. 3
Haverford S .
. Swarthmore 1
Poor old Swarthmorel
A familial K«n(
Taking a hlgh'boll at Navy
;1 1 Y\\-\
BASKETBALL TEAM BASKETBALL
Reaching the crucial Swarthmore game with a record
of only three wins in a dozen contests, the pros-
pects of a basketball victory over our ancient rival
seemed extremely remote and almost out of the
question. However, with the newly-installed system
finally showing results, and Captain Lou Flaccus,
the team's only Senior, leading the scoring parade,
Haverford stamped the season a distinct success
by drubbing the visiting courtmen 31-25.
Ouolco Flaccus, the high-scoring flash
Hoverlord 23 .
. Philadelphia Textile 9
Hoverlord 1 7 .
. Weslevan 22
IHoverFord 27 .
. Trinity 30
Hoverford 8! .
. Upsula 26
hHoveriord 1 3 .
. Lehigh 28
Haverford 21 .
. P. M. C. 32
Haverford 1 9 .
. Delaware 28
Haverford 38 .
. Moravian 1 4
Haverford 1 7 ,
. Hamilton 25
Hoverford 20 .
. Lafayette 23
Haverford 21 .
. Stevens 22
Haverford 31 .
. Princeton Seminory 29
Haverford 31 .
. Sworthmore 25
In Its first season as a recognized major sport, the Haver-
ford mat squad failed to win a single meet, oltfiougfi
gaining an 18-18 deadlock with Gettysburg in the opener.
With a squad composed entirely of underclassmen, next
year's team, which will again be led by Captain Blanc-Roos,
should succeed in compiling a more successful record.
Also assuming the role of a newcomer to
Haverford athletics, the fencing squad,
under the tutelage of hienri Gordon, gained
Four victories in nine starts. Oliver Egleslon
was the only Senior member of the squad
to be lost by graduation.
Totvm Brous Aikvns
FRONT ROW— Shoemaker
BACK ROW— Vining
Likewise competing for the
first lime as a recognized
varsity sport, the Cross-Coun-
try team was equally unsuc-
cessful, failing to gain a single
victory in five starts. Captain
Bodine and Scattergood, the
team's only Seniors, were its
outstanding performers, the
former gaining one first place,
two seconds, and a third in
the five meets.
A new addition to Haverford
athletics, the squash team, in
its first season tared poorly.
Meeting a group of nearby
Prep schools, the local racquel-
eers gained only a, single vic-
tory in eight starts. However,
with the exception of Floccus,
Hogenauer and McKee, who
played in a few matches, the
entire squad will return next
year and should compile a
more enviable record for 1935.
STANDING — Floccm
HulcSinion Seely McNeary
F. Morgan MoH
Leitei Holier Ambler
Rodman Beck Potter
Hunt Wall Marshall
Ouffield Lingerman Bodine
Richardion Pott! Siebert
The home stretch
Preparing for their opening meet with Dickinson,
the local trackmen found themselves extremely
poor in the hurdles and the field events, v^^ith
the prospects for a successful season greatly
dimmed by these weaknesses, hlotz. Rush and
Richardson in the field events, Bodine and
Scattergood in the distances, and Captain
Bancroft in the dashes, appeared as the most
likely point winners among the Senior members
of the squad.
In the lead
.<4Jlll<! * .T^SR-
April 14 .
. Dickinson, home
April !1 .
. Amherst, away
April 88 .
. Johns Hopkins, owoy
Moy 5 .
May IJ .
. M AS.C.A.A ,oway
May 19 .
. Swarthmore, away
Taking the low hurdles
i - ^
Umph! Yyh got mel
The weary trek
Hawkins Smirh (Manager)
Wtlllnglon Malx Allceni
Baird Gawlhrap Frawr
Corion Gritwold Gainftt
Nicholson Singer Richie
Haries (Captain) Wilson
Tripp Foerster Taylor
For the First time in many years Haverford's
baseball prospect this season was unu-
sually hopeful. With only two members of
last year's team having graduated, and
with the entire infield returning, the local
tossers had, in the early spring, high hopes
of turning in an enviable record during the
campaign. Captain Harjes, Richie, Wilson,
and Tripp, all of whom have had three
years of varsity experience, ore the Seniors
who will contribute to the team's success,
and are looking forward to their first victory
over an ancient rival, Swarthmore.
April 14 .
. Delaware, owov
April 18 .
. Moravian, home
April SI .
. Osteopathy, home
April 25 .
. Stevens, home
April S7 .
. Wiltiami, home
May 1 .
. Lehigh, away
May 2 .
. Lehigh, home
May 7 .
. Homplon-Sydney, home
. P. M. C. home
May 11 .
. Swarthmore, home
May 16 .
. Lafayette home
May 19 .
. Moravian, awoy
W*ll, why don't you run?
One of our boys
Junior day game with Swarthmort
jM.1 I I
Although decisively beaten by Virginia,
Navy and Pennsylvania in their opening
matches, the local netmen, v^ith a well-
balanced squad, gave earnest of more
substantial results during the remainder o\
their season v^'hen meeting teams of their
own calibre. Captain Flaccus and Man-
ager Jones, playing first and third singles
respectively, are the two Senior members
of the team.
At managsr and play*
Tha climax of the l«nnli i»aion
Match 30 .
. Virginia, away
. LalayeHe, awoy
. Novy, away
. Lehigh, home
. Pennsylvonic, owoy
. Bucknell, away
. Weit Chester Teocherj
. Dickinson, away
. lohns Hopkins, home
. Union, home
. Brooklyn, home
. Hamilton, home
. Swarthmore, away
. Stevens, home
. Temple, home
. Bucknell, home
. Wesleyan, away
Schmid Smith Haywood
Knight Rector Matthews
Bridger Wright Crawford
A group of veterans led by Captain Tom Brown,
strengthened by the addition of a few promising
Freshmen, carried on Haverford's distinction as the
only cricket-playing college in America this spring.
April 1 4
The chirping cricket
Lemon or cream? — Lemons!
. . Ardmore C. C, home
, . Baltimore C. C, home
. . General Electric C. C. home
, . Crescent A. C, home
, . Viscose C. C, home
, . Alumni, home
. Princeton Graduate School,
. Alumni, home
Voted the most popular course
April 13 .
April 16 .
April 19 .
April SO .
April S3 .
April !5 .
April !7 ,
Under the leadership of Captain McKee,
the local linksmen started their campaign
by garnering a pair of easy conquests
over West Chester and Swarthmore.
The team is a group of veterans aug-
mented by the addition of two Fresh-
men, Linton and Allen.
"I wandered, lonely oi o cloud
Franklin and Marshall,
May 1 5
May 18 .
May 21 .
May S3 .
, Swarthmore, away
, Hill School, away
Johns Hopkins, home
. St. Josephs, awoy
. Cornell, away
. Alumni, home
page one hundred thirty-eight
The necessary steps
AFter the war
Little comfort in the prospects
Snaps of College Life,
usual and unusual,
we think to be more
than a prosy and
The pause that lost us the Penn soccer gome
The nudist of the new
The early birds get the worms. And how I
Loyalty or college spirits
The anafomy of flits
A mess hall (In truth)
An atmosphere of slumber pervades the library
The eve of the Delaware game
They're off —
all, lusl a little
The sublime and the ridiculous
The radio doesn't work, either
For miles around nothing may be seen but quaint old carts and children at their play
"All hope abandon,
ye who enter here"
Mac — the flying
Some jockeys, eh, boss ?
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HAVERFORD • PENNA,
Official Booksellers to Haverford College
Ardmore Printing Co.
Printers for Particular People
49 RIHENHOUSE PLACE
BRIGGS & SONS
with its large
alumni circulation, unique
among college papers,
offers an exceptional
advertising medium for
CAMPUS CIRCULATION ....
ADVERTISERS AND EXCHANGES
68 Years of Constructive Service
and Character Building
Thinking men and women know that a
reputation sustained over two-thirds of
a century is not accidentally gained,
but that it is significant of high ideals
and useful service
Business Administration, Accounting
and Secretarial Courses
PEIRCE SCHOOL OF BUSINESS ADMINISTRATION
Pine Street, West of Broad • Philadelphia, Pa.
^a tke O/^ii aj: 34-
HAVERFORD PHARMACY ■
HEALTH • WEALTH
NSURE AND BE SURE
It is only natural to want to know that what is yours today will
continue to be yours. Yet how can you be certain when your
home, furnishings, car and other possessions are constantly subject
to the dangers of fire, explosion, windstorm, collision and other
hazards? Any one of these can take your property from you
as effectively as a thief.
YeC there IS a way to evade the financial punishment of
these hazards. Adequate property insurance guarantees
that what is yours will continue to be yours.
INSURANCE COMPANY OF NORTH AMERICA
AND ITS ASSOCIATED COMPANIES WRITE PRACTICAUY
EVERY FORM OF INSURANCE . . EXCEPT LIFE
I INS. CO. N. A.
INSURANCE FOR STUDENTS
Personal Effects, Automobiles, Accidents,
Fire or Tfieft while at college or else^^here.
Risks to property or person wfiile traveling
in this country or abroacj. Damage to motor
cars. Liability for accidents to persons or
J. B. LONGACRE
Successor ro Longacre & Ewlng
BULLin BUILDING -141 S. FOURTH ST.
CATERERS ■ CONFECTIONERS
For the Discriminating Hostess
Caterers for the Haverford Centenary
RESTAURANT, 114 and 115 N. 19th St.
WILLIAM NEWMAN, Manager
. . . the name of this firm
has been nationally rec-
ognized as headquarters
for Young Men's Apparel
that is exceptionally fine
in Quality, and authentic
to the lost detail of Style!
JACOB REED'S SONS
CHESTNUT ST., PHILADELPHIA
BEYER & CO.
233-235 CALLOWHILL ST., PHILA.
POULTRY • EGGS • BUTTER
FAMOUS BEACHDALE DUCKLING DIFFERENT
LIBRARY AND LAW BOOKS
2416 NORTH FIFTEENTH STREET
BREYER ICE CREAM CO.
Patronize the Breyer Dealer
WASHINGTON NEW YORK PHILADELPHIA
Cricket Hand Laundry
(The Homelike Laundry Service)
41 CRICKET AVENUE • ARDMORE, PA.
Strictly Hand Work ... All Types
of Service . . . We Darn, Mend,
and Sew Buttons on . . . FREE
WE CALL AND DELIVER
Yo ur Guarantee of
Real ROOT JUICES
J^ku ^;:/-raveti:ctJL L^clleae cir^itnuaL was printed by the
AQUATONE PROCESS • EDWARD STERN & COMPANY, INC.
140 NORTH SIXTH STREET, PHILADELPHIA