Thomas of Reading: or, The sixe worthie yeomen of the West

' llfls

Wfflwfl IbSB

- ' • 9 ■'

-jjiijrivbur

"'/OaJAINIUtV

•'auauvj-du'

■'ouauvjau-

-jujnv iui —

^jQiivmin*

^EUNIVERS/A

O
la-

I

^lOSANGElfj^.

r"

UIF(%. ^0FCA1IF(%.

>

M

c->

^Aavaaii-^ ^Aavaain^

&

5

V-\\\EUN1VER% ^10SMCEI%

* ■■JV, E-J , J n \J CO

ARY0A

IS)

O

C3A

t — .

:ary^

-t"^V>

tTM-§

'jjto-soi

\>

•ANCELfTx

v/^3AINa-3\\v

^UIBRARY-0/-

<$UIBRARY0r

LI IT

2

%JITY3-J^

«,

7XJ

^OF-CAllFORto ^OF

U£\

AttMJNIVERS/A.

©I

,OF-CMIF0/?^

fcAavaaiH^

/EW//,

^TiUDNV-SOl^ %a3AINn-3ft^ ^OJIIVJ-JO^"

n

1AINH3WV

CO

SO

VERty*.

^10S-ANGEI&*

CJ» <_3

<^U|BR
5 1 I

^t-LIBRARYO-

iaCta 1 1 cnn .

%

<Til33NV-S

dOSANCElfj>

CO

SO

^3AINn-3WVN

r"l

<Tij33NV-S01

'/Wl3AINfl-3t\V

§

■30^

a s*Vv

F08^

o

C">

< ^ -J

^ II l ■ 1

CO f\ \

=3

Si *■""%—

1^

-J t J J\ i T JU I

0 *L- O

^V/^

THOMAS

OF

READING:

OR,

The lixe worthie Yeomen

of the West.

Now the fixth time corrected and enlarged

By T. D.

Ik

i § 1

5>

LONDON,

Printed by Eliz. A l l d e for
Robert Bird.

16 32.

.

.

'<A.

The pleafant Hiftorie of the Sixe

worthy Yeomen of the Weft.

N the Dayes of King Henry the
Firft:, who was the firft King that
inftituted the High Court of Par-
liament, there lived nine Men,
which for the Trade of Clothing,
were famous thorowout all Eng-
land. Which Art in thofe Dayes was held in high
Reputation, both in refpecl of the great Riches that
thereby was gotten, as alfo of the Benefit it brought
to the whole Common-wealth : the younger Sons of
Knights and Gentlemen, to whom their Fathers would
leaue no Lands, were moft commonly preferred to
learne this Trade, to the End, that thereby they might
liue in good Eftate, and driue forth their Dayes in
Profperity.

Among all Crafts this was the onely Chiefe, for
that it was the greateft Merchandize, by the which
our Country became famous thorowout all Nations.
And it was verily thought, that the one Halfe the Peo-
ple

f~~S M %~ur v .

The pleafant Hiftorie

pie in the Land lived in thofe Dayes thereby, and in
fuch good Sort, that in the Common-wealth there were
few or no Beggers at all : poore People, whom God
lightly blefled with moft Children, did by Means of
this Occupation fo order them, that by the Time that
they were come to be five or feuen Yeeres of Age,
they were able to get their owne Bread : Idleneffe was
then banifhed our Coaft, fo that it was a rare Thing
to heare of a Thiefe in thofe Dayes. Therefore it was
not without Caufe that Clothiers were then both ho-
noured and loved, among whom thefe nine Perfons
in this Kings Dayes were of great Credit, viz. Tho. Cole
of Reading, Gray of Glocefter, Sutton of Salifburie,
Fitzallan of Worcefler, (commonly called William of
Worcefter) Tom Doue of Excefter, and Simon of South-
hampton, alias Supbroth : who were by the King call-
ed, The Sixe worthy Hufbands of the Weft. Then
were there Three liuing in the North, that is to say,
Cutbert of Kendall, Hodgekins of Hallifax, & Martin
Byram of Manchefler. Euery one of thefe kept a
great Number of Seruants at Worke, Spinners, Card-
ers, Weauers, Fullers, Dyers, Sheeremen, and Row-
ers, to the great Admiration of all thofe that came
into their Houfes to behold them.

Now you mall vnderftand, thofe gallant Clothiers,
by Reafon of their dwelling Places, feparated them-
felues in three feuerall Companies : Gray of Glocef-
ter,

of Thomas of Reading.

ter, William of Worcefter, and Thomas of Reading,
becaufe their Iourney to London was all one Way,
they conuerfed commonly together : And Doue of
Excefter, Sutton of Salifburie, and Simon of South-
hampton, they in like Sort kept Company the one with
the other, meeting euer all together at Bazingfloke :
and the three Northerne Clothiers did the like, who
commonly did not meet till they came to Bolomes
Inne in London.

Moreouer, for the Love and Delight that thefe
Wefterne Men had each in others Companie, they did
fo prouide, that their Waines and themfelues would
euer meet upon one Day in London at Iarrats Hall,
surnamed the Gyant, for that hee furpafled all other
Men of that Age, both in Stature & Strength : whofe
Meriments and memorable Deeds, I will fet downe
vnto you in this following Difcourfe.

How King Henry fought the Fauour of all his Subjects,

efpecially of the Clothiers. Chap. 1.

^HIS King Henry ) who for his great Learning and

-*- Wifedome was called Beauclarke, beeing the third

Son to the renowned Conquerour : after the Death of

his Brother William Ruffus, tooke upon him the Go-

uernment of this Land, in the Abfence of his fecond

Brother Robert Duke of Normandie, who at this Time

was

The plea Pant Hiftorie

was at Wars amongft the Infidels, and was chofen
King of Jerufalem, the which he, for the Loue he bare
to his owne Country, refufed, and with great Honour
returned from the Holy Land ; of whofe comming
when King Henry vnderflood, knowing hee would
make Claime to the Crowne, fought by all Meanes
possible to winne the good "Will of his Nobility, and
to get the Fauor of the Commons by Courtefie : for
the obtaining whereof hee did them many Fauours,
thereby the better to flrengthen himselfe againfl his
Brother.

It chanced on a Time, as he, with one of his Sonnes,
and diuers of his Nobilitie, rode from London towards
Wales, to appeafe the Fury of the Welfhmen, which
then began to raife themfelues in Amies againfl his
Authority, that he met with a great Number of
Waines loaden with Cloth, comming to London, and
feeing them flill driue one after another fo many to-
gether, demanded whofe they were : the Waine-men
anfwered in this Sort : Coles of Reading (quoth they.)
Then by and by the King afked another, faying,
Whofe Cloth is all this ? Old Coles, quoth hee : and
againe anon after he afked the fame Queftion to
others, & flil they anfwered, Old Coles. And it is to
be remembered, that the King met them in fuch a
Place fo narrow and ftreight, that hee with the Refl of

his

of Thomas of Reading.

his Traine, were faine to (land as clofe to the Hedge,
whileft the Carts paifed by, the which at that Time
being in Number aboue Two Hundred, was neere
hand an Houre ere the King could get Roome to be
gone : fo that by his long Stay, he began to be dis-
pleafed, although the Admiration of that Sight did
much qualifie his Furie ; but breaking out in Discon-
tent, by Reafon of his Stay, he faid, I thought Old
Cole had got a Commiflion for all the Carts in the
Country to cary his Cloth. And how if he haue
(quoth one of the Wainmen) doth that grieue you,
good Sir ? Yes, good Sir, faid our King, what fay you
to that ? The Fellow feeing the King (in alking that
Queftion) to bend his Browes, though he knew not
what he was, yet being abafht, he anfwered thus :
Why, Sir, if you be angry, no body can hinder you ;
for poflible, Sir, you haue Anger at Commandement.
The King feeing him in vttering of his Words to qui-
uer and quake, laughed heartily at him, as well in
refpect of his fimple Anfwer, as at his Feare : and
fo foone after the laft Wain went by, which gaue pre-
fent Passage vnto him and his Nobles : and thereupon
entring into Communication of the Commoditie of
Cloathing, the King gaue Order at his Home Returne,
to haue Old Cole brought before his Maieflie, to the
Intent he might haue Conference with him, noting
him to be a Subject of great Ability : but by that Time

he

The pleafant Hiftorie

he came within a Mile of Stanes, he met another Com-
pany of Waines in like Sort laden with Cloth, where-
by the King was driuen into a further Admiration :
and demanding whofe they were, anfwere was made
in this Sort : They be Good-man Suttons of Salifbury,
good Sir : and by that Time a Score of them were
paft, he alked againe, faying : whofe are thefe ? Sut-
tons of Salifburie, qd. they, and fo hull, as often as the
King alked that Queftion, they anfwered, Suttons of
Salifburie. God fend me many fuch Suttons, faid the
King. And thus the farther he trauelled Weft ward,
more Waines and more he met continually : upon
which Occafion he faid to his Nobles, That it would
neuer grieue a King to die for the Defence of a fertile
Countrie and faithfull Subiects. I alwayes thought
(quoth he) that Englands Valor was more then her
Wealth, yet now I fee her Wealth sufficient to main-
taine her Valour, which I will seeke to cherish in all
I may, and with my Sword keepe my selfe in Posses-
sion of that I haue, Kings and Louers con brooke no
Partners : and therefore let my Brother Robert thinke,
that although hee was Heire to England by Birth, yet
I am King by Possession. All his Fauourers I must
account my Foes, and will serue them as I did the vn-
gratefull Earle of Shrewsbury, whose Lands I have
seized, and banisht his Body. But now we will leaue
the King to his Iourney into Wales, and waiting his

Home

of Thomas of Reading

&■

Home Returne, in the meane Time tell you the Meet-
ing of these iolly Clothiers at London.

How William of Worcejier, Gray of Glocefter, and Old
Cole of Reading, met all together at Reading, and of
their Communication by the Way as they rode to
London, Chap. 2.
11^ HEN Gray of Gloceiter and William of Worcef-
ter were come to Reading, according to their Cuf-
tome, they always called old Cole to haue his Companie
to London, who alfo duely attended their comming, ha-
uing prouided a good Breakefafl for them : and when
they had well refrefhed themfelues, they tooke their
Horfes and rode on towards the Cittie : and in their
Iourney William of Worcefter afked them if they had
not heard of the Earle of Moraigne his Efcape out of
the Land ? What is he fled ? qd. Gray. I mufe much
at this Matter, being in fuch great Regard with the
King as he was : but I pray you, doe you not know
the Caufe of his going ? qd. Cole. The common Re-
port, quoth Gray, is this, that the couetous Earle, who
through a greedy Defire, neuer left begging of the
King for one Thing or other, and his Requeft being
now denied him, of meere Obftinacy and wilfull Fro-
wardnefle, hath banifhed himfelfe out of the Land, &
quite forfaken the Country of Cornwall, hauing made

B a Vow

The pleafant Hiftorie

a Vow neuer to fet Foote within England againe, and,
as Report goeth, he with the late banifht Earle of
Shrewfbury, haue ioyned themfelues with Robert Duke
of Normandy, againft the King, the which Action of
theirs hath inflamed the Kings Wrath, that their La-
dies with their Children are quite turned out of Doores
fuccourleffe and friendleffe, fo that it is told me, they
wander up and downe the Country like forlorne Peo-
ple, and although many doe pitie them, yet few doe
releeue them.

A lamentable Hearing, qd. William of Worcefter,
& with that cafting their Eyes afide, they efpyed Tom
Done with the Reft of his Companions come riding to
meete them, who as soone as they were come thither,
fell into fuch pleafant Difcourfes, as did fhorten the
long Way they had to Colebroke, where alwayes at
their comming towards London they dined ; and being
once entred into their Inne, according to olde Cuf-
tome, good Cheere was provided for them : for thefe
Clothiers were the chiefeft Guefts that trauailed along
the Way : and this was fure as an A£t of Parliament,
that Tom Doue could not digeft his Meat without Mu-
ficke, nor drinke Wine without Women, fo that his
Hoftefle being a merry Wench, would oftentimes call
in Two or Three of her Neighbours Wiues to keepe
him Company, where, ere they parted, they were made

as

of Thomas of Reading.

o"

as pleafant as Pies. And this being a continuall Cuf-
tome amongfl them when they came thither, at length
the Womens Hufbands beganne to take Exceptions at
their Wives going thither : whereupon great Contro-
uerfie grew betweene them, in fuch Sort, that when
they were moll retrained, then they had mod Defire
to worke their Wills : now gip (quoth they) mufl we
be fo tyed to our Tafke, that wee may not drinke with
our Friends ? fie, fie, vpon thefe yellow Hofe , will
no other Die ferue your turne ? haue wee thus long
bin your Wiues, and doe you now miftruft vs ? verily
you eate too much Salt, and that makes you grow
cholericke, badde Liuers iudge all Others the like,
but in Faith you mall not bridle us fo like Afles, but
wee will goe to our Friends, when we are fent for,
and doe you what you can. Well, quoth their Huf-
bands, if you be fo head-ftrong, we will tame you :
it is the Duty of honefl Women to obey their Huf-
bands Sayings. And of honeft Men (quoth they) to
thinke well of their Wives j but who doe fooner im-
peach their Credit, then their Hufbands charging
them, if they doe but firiile, that they are subtill ; and
if they doe but winke, they account them wily : if sad
of Countenance, then fullen : if they be froward, then
they are counted Shrewes : and fheepifh if they bee
gentle : if a Woman keepe her Houfe, then you will
fay fhe is melancholy, if fhee walke abroade, then you

call

The pleafant Hiftorie

call her a Gadder ; a Puritane, if fhe be precife ; and
a Wanton, if fhee be pleafant : fo there is no Woman
in the World that knowes how to pleafe you : that we
think our felues accurft to be married Wiues, liuing
with fo many Woes. Thefe men, of whofe Company
you forewarne vs, are (for aught that euer we faw)
both honefh and courteous, and in Wealth farre be-
yond your felues : then what Reafon is there, why we
mould reflraine to vifit them ? is their Good-will fo
much to be requited with Scorne, that their Coft may
not be counteruailed with our Company ? if a Woman
be difpofed to play light of Love, alas, alas, doe you
thinke that you can preuent her ? Nay, wee will abide
by it, that the Reftraint of Liberty inforceth Women
to be lewd : for where a Woman cannot be trusted,
fhe cannot thinke her felfe beloved, and if not beloved,
what Caufe hath fhe to care for fuch a One ? there-
fore, Hufbands, reforme your Opinions, and doe not
worke your owne Woes, without our Difcredit. The
Clothiers, we tell you, are jolly Fellows, and but in
refpect of our Courtefie, they would fcorne our Com-
pany.

The Men hearing their Wiues fo well to plead for
themfelues, knew not how to anfwer, but faid, they
would put the Burden on their Confciences, if they
deale vniuftly with them, and fo left them to their
owne Wills. The Women hauing thus conquered

their

of Thomas of Reading.

their Hufbands Conceits, would not leaue the Fauour
of their Friends for Frownes, and as aboue the Reft
Tom Doue was the moft pleafanteft, fo was he had in
moft Reputation with the Women, who for his Sake
made this Song :

Welcome to Towne, Tarn Doue, Tom Doue,

The merrieft Man aliue,

Thy Company still we loue, we loue,

God grant thee well to thriue.

And neuer will depart from thee,

For better or worfe, my Ioy,

For thou fhalt ftill haue our good Will,

Gods Blessing on my fweet Boy.
This Song went vp and downe through the whole
Country, and at length became a Dance among the
common Sort, fo that Tom Doue, for his Mirth and
good Fellowfhip, was famous in euery Place. Now
when they came to London, they were welcome to the
vaft larrat the Gyant, & as foone as they were
alighted, they were faluted by the Merchants, who
waited their comming thither, and alwayes prepared
for them a coftly Supper, where they commonly made
their Bargaine, and vpon euery Bargaine made, they
ftill vfed to fend fome Tokens to the Clothiers Wiues.
The next Morning they went to the Hall, where they
met the Northerne Clothiers, who greeted one another

in

6

The pleafant Hiftorie

in this Sort. What, my Mailers of the Weft, well
met : what Cheere ? what Cheer ? Euen the beft
Cheere our Merchants could make vs, (quoth Gray.)
Then you could not chufe but fare well, quoth Hodge'
kins : and you be weary of our Company, adieu, quoth
Sutton : Not fo, faid Martin, but fhall wee not haue
a Game ere we goe ? Yes faith for an Hundred
Pounds. Well faid, Old Cole, faid they: and with
that Cole and Gray went to the Dice with Martin and
Hodgekins ; and the Dice running on Hodgekins Side,
Coles Money began to wafte. Now by the Mafle,
quoth Cole, my Money mines as bad as Northerne
Cloth. When they had played long, Gray ftept to it,
and recouered againe the Money that Cole had loft.
But while they were thus playing, the Reft being de-
lighted in contrary Matters, etiery Man fatisfied his
owne Humour.

Tom Doue called for Muficke, William of Worcef-
ter for Wine, Sutton fet his Delight in hearing Merry
Tales, Simon of South-hampton got him into the Kit-
chen, and to the Pottage Pot he goes, for he efteemed
more a Meffe of Pottage, than of a Venizon Pafty.
Now, Sir, Cutbert of Kendall was of an other Mind, for
no Meate pleafed him fo well as Mutton, fuch as was
laced in a red Petticoate. And you fhall vnderftand,
that alwayes when they went to Dice, they got into

Bofoms

of Thomas of Reading.

Bofomes Inne ; which was so called of his Name that
kept it, who being a foule Slouen, went alwayes with
his Nofe in his Bofome, and one Hand in his Pocket,
the other on his Staffe, figuring forth a Defcription of
cold Winter, for he alwayes wore two Coates, two
Caps, two or three Paire of Stockings, and a high
Pair of Shooes, ouer the which he drew on a great
Pair of lined Slippers, and yet would oft complaine of
Cold : wherefore of all Men generally he was called
Old Bofome, and his Houfe Bofomes Inne.

This Lump of cold Ice had lately married a young
Wife, who was as wily as fhe was wanton, and in her
Company did Cutbert onely delight, and the better to
make Paifage to his Loue, he would often thus com-
mune with her : I mufe, good Wife, quoth he. Good
Wife ? quoth fhe : Verily, Sir, in mine Opinion, there
is none good but God, and therefore call me Mistreffe,
Then faid Cutbert, Faire Miftris, I haue often mufed,
that you being a proper Woman, could find in your
Heart for to match with fuch a greazie Carle as this,
an euill mannered Mate, a foule Lump of Kitchen-
StufFe, and fuch a One as is indeede a Scorne of Men ;
how can you like him that all Women miflikes ; or
loue fuch a loathfome Creature ? me thinks verily it
mould grieue you to lend him a Kiffe, much more to
lie with him. Indeed, Sir, quoth fhe, I had but hard
Fortune in this refpect, but my Friends would have it

The pleafant Hiftorie

fo, and truly my Liking and my Love towards him
are alike, he neuer had the one, nor neuer fhall get
the other : yet I may fay to you, Before I married
him, there were diuers proper young Men that were
Sutors vnto me, who loued mee as their Liues, and glad
was he that could get my Company ; thofe were my
golden Dayes, wherein my Pleafure abounded, but
thefe Yeeres of Care and Griefe, wherein my Sorrowes
exceede. Now no Man regards mee, no Man cares
for me, and , albeit in fecret they might beare mee
Good-will, yet who dares fhew it ? and this is a dou-
ble Griefe, he carries ouer me fo iealous a Minde,
that I cannot looke at a Man, but prefently he accu-
feth me of Inconftancy, although (I proteft) without
Caufe.

And in troth, qd. Cutbert, he mould haue Caufe to
complaine for fomewhat, were I as you. As hire as I
live, and fo he fhall, quoth fhe, if he doe not change
his Byas. Cutbert hearing her fay fo, began to grow
further in requefting her Fauour, wifhing he might
be her Seruant and fecret Friend, and the better to
obtaine his Defire, he gaue her diuers Gifts, infomuch
that fhe began Something to liften vnto him : and al-
beit fhe liked well of his Speeches, yet would fhe blame
him, and take him up very fhort fometimes for the
fame, till in the End, Cutbert fhewed himfelfe to be
defperate, faying hee would drowne himfelfe rather

than

of Thomas of Reading.

then Hue in her Difdaine. O my fweet Heart not fo,
quoth fhee, God forbid I mould be the Death of any
Man : Comfort thy felfe, kind Cutbert, and take this
Kifle in Token of further Kindneffe, and if thou wilt
haue my Fauour, thou muft be wife and circum-
fpecl:, and in my Huibands Sight I would alwayes
haue thee to find Fault with my Doings, blame my
bad Hufwifries, difpraife my Perfon, and take Ex-
ceptions at every Thing, whereby he will be as well
pleafed, as Simon of South-hampton with a Mefie of
Pottage.

Deare MiftrefTe, quoth he, I will fulfill your Charge
to the vttermoft, fo that you will not take my left in
earneft. Shee anfwered, Thy fouleft Speeches 1 will
efteeme the fairefl, and take euery Difpraife to be a
Praife from thee, turning each Word to the contrary :
and fo for this Time adieu, good Cutb. for Supper
Time drawes neere, & it is meet for me to looke for
my Meat. With that down comes old Bofome, call-
ing his Wife, faying, Ho, Winifred, is Supper ready ?
they haue done playing aboue : therefore Jet the
Chamberlaine couer the Table. By & by Hufband,
qd. fhe, it (hall be done ftraight-way. How now, my
Mafters, who wins ? qd. Cutbert. Our Money walkes
to the Weft, qd. Martin : Cole hath woone 40 Pounds
of me, and Gray hath gotten well : the beft is, qd.
Hodgekins, they will pay for our Supper : then let vs

c haue

The pleafant Hiftorie

haue good Store of Sacke, qd. Sutton. Content, faid
Cole, for I promife you, I ftriue not to grow rich by
Dice-playing, therefore call for what you will, I will
pay for all. Yea, faid Simon ! Chamberlaine, I pray
thee bring a whole Bottle of Pottage for me. Now
Tom Done had all the Fidlers at a Becke of his Finger,
which follow him up and down the City, as diligent
as little Chickens after a Hen, and made a Vow, that
there mould want no Muficke. And at that Time
there liued in London a Mufician of great Reputation,
named Reior, who kept his Seruants in fuch coftly
Garments, that they might feeme to come before any
Prince. Their Coates were all of one Colour ; and
it is faid, that afterward the Nobility of this Land,
noting it for a feemely Sight, vfed in like Maner to
keepe their Men all in one Liuery. This Reior was
the moft fkilfulleft Mufician that liued at that Time,
whofe Wealth was uery great, fo that all the Inftru-
ments whereon his Seruants plaid, were richly gar-
nifhed with Studdes of Siluer, and fome Gold : the
Bowes belonging to their Violines were all likewife of
pure Siluer. Hee was alfo for his Wifedome called
to great Office in the City, who alfo builded (at his
owne Coft) the Priory & Hofpitall of S. Bartholomew
in Smithfield. His Seruants being the befl Conforts
in the City, were by To?n Done appointed to play be-
fore the young Princes. Then Supper being brought

to

of Thomas of Reading.

&•

to the Boord, they all fat down, and by and by after
comes vp their Oaft, who tooke his Place among
them : and anon after, the Good -wife in a red Peti-
cote & a Waftcoate, comes among them as white as a
Lilly, faying, My Mailers, you are welcome, 1 pray
you be merry. Thus falling clofe to their Meate,
when they had well fed, they found Leyfure to talke
one with another : at that Time Cuib. began thus to
find Fault, Ywis, my Oaft, quoth he, you haue a wife
Hufwife to your Wife, heere is Meate dreft on a new
Fafhion? God fends Meate, and the Deuill fends
Cooks. Why what ailes the Meate, quoth fhe, ferues
it not your Turnes ? better Men then your felfe are
content withall, but a paultry Companion is euer worft
to pleafe. Away, you fluttifh 'Ihing, qd. Cutbert,
your Hufband hath a fweet Jewell of you : I maruell
fuch a graue ancient Man would match himfelfe with
fuch a young Giglot, that hath as much Handfomenes
in her as good Hufwifry, which is iuft nothing at all.
Well, Sir, faid fhee, in regard of my Hufbands Pre-
fence I am loth to aggrauate Anger, otherwife I would
tell thee thy owne. Goe to, what needs all this, quoth
the Company ? in good Faith, Cu'bert, you are to
b'ame, you find Fault where none is. Turn, I muft
fpeake my Mind, quoth Cu berl, I cannot diffemble, I
truft the good Man thinkes neuer the worfe of me :
fo I have his good Will, what the foule Euill care I

for

The pleafant Hiftorie

for his Wifes. Enough, quoth Tom Doue, let us with
Muficke remoue thefe Brabbles, we meane to be
merry, and not melancholy. Then, faid old Cole,
Now trull me, Cutbert, we will haue your OaftefTe
and you Friends ere we part : here, Woman, I drinke
to you, and regard not his Words, for he is babbling
wherefoeuer he comes. Quoth the Woman, Nothing
grieues me fo much, as that hee mould thus openly
checke mee : if he had found any Thing amiffe, he
might haue fpied a better Time to tell me of it than
nowe, ywis he need not thrufl my bad Hufwifrie into
my Hufbands Head, I Hue not fo quietly with him,
God wot : and with that fhe wept. Come, Cutbert,
quoth they, drinke to her, and make Hands and be
Friends. Come on, you puling Baggage, quoth he,
I drinke to you, here will you pledge mee and fhake
Hands ? No, (quoth (hee) I will fee thee choackt firft,
(hake Hands with thee ? I will fhake Hands with the
Deuill as foon. Goe to, faid her Hufband, you mail
(hake Hands with him then : If you will not fhake
Hands, He fhake you : what, you young Hufwife ?
Well, Hufband, faid fhe, it becomes a Woman to
obey her Hufband, in regard whereof I drink to him.
Thats well faid, quoth the Company : & fo fhe tooke
her Leaue h went downe. And within a while after
they paid the Shot, and departed thence to larrats
Hall, where they went to their Lodging ; and the

next

of Thomas of Reading.

next Day they tooke their way homewards all toge-
ther : and comming to Colebroke, they tooke vp their
Lodging : and it was Coles Cuftome to deliuer his
Money to the Goodwife of the Houfe to keepe it till
Morning, which in the End turned to his utter De-
finition, as hereafter fhall be fhewed.

How Grayes Wife of Glocejier, with One or Two
more of her Neighbours, went to the Faire, where Ser-
vants came to be hired, Iff how Jhe tooke the Earle of
Shrewfburies Daughter into her Seruice. Chap. S.
TT was wont to be an old Cuftome in Gloceflerfhire,

that at a certaine Time in the Yeere, all fuch young
Men and Maidens as were out of Service, reforted to
a Faire that was kept neere Glocefter, there to be
ready for any that would come to hire them, the
young Men flood all on a Row on the one Side, and
the Maidens on the other. It came to paffe, that the
Earle of Shrewfburies Daughter, whofe Father was
lately banifhed, being driven into great DiftrefTe, and
weary with Trauell, as one whofe delicate Life was
neuer vfed to fuch Toyle, fate her downe vpon the
High-way Side, making this Lamentation :

O falfe and deceitfull World ! quoth fhe ; who is in
thee that wifhes not to be rid of thee, for thy Extre-
mities are great ? Thou art deceitfull to all, and trufty
to none. Fortune is thy Treafurer, who is like thy

felfe,

The pleafant Iliftorie

felfe, wauering and vnconftant, fhe fetteth up Tyrants,
beateth down Kings ; giveth Shame to fome, and Re-
nowne to others : Fortune giveth thefe Evils, and we
fee it not : with her Hands fhe toucheth vs, & we feele
it not : fhe treades vs vnder Foot, and we know it
not : fhe fpeakes in our Eares, and we heare her not :
fhe cries aloud, and we vnderftand her not : And
why ? becaufe we know her not, until Mifery doth
make her manifefl.

Ah, my deare Father, well maift thou doe. Of all
Misfortunes it is mofl vnhappy to be fortunate : and
by this Misfortune came my fall. Was euer good Lady
brought to this Extremity ? What is become of my
rare Jewels, my rich Aray, my fumptuous Fare, my
waiting Seruants, my many Friends, and all my vaine
Pleafures ? my Pleafure is banifht by Difpleafure, my
Friends fled like Foes, my Seruants gone, my feaft-
ing turned to fafting, my rich Array confumed to
Ragges, and my Jewels decke out my chiefeft Ene-
mies : therefore of all Things the meanefh State is
beft, Pouerty with Surety is better then Honour mix-
ed with Feare : feeing God hath allotted me to this
Mifery of Life, I will frame my Heart to embrace Hu-
mility, and carry a Mind anfwerable to my Misfor-
tunes : fie on this vaine Title of Ladyfhip, how little
doth it auaile the diflreifed ? No, no, I muft there-
fore forget my Birth and Parentage, and think no

more
6

of Thomas of Reading.

&■

more on my Fathers Houfe. Where I was wont to bee
ferued, now will I learne to ferue, and plaine Meg
fhall be my Name ; good Lord grant I may get a good
Seruice, nay any Seruice fhall ferue, where I may haue
Meat, Drinke, and Apparell. She had no fooner
fpoken thefe Words, but (he fpied a Couple of Maidens
more comming towards her, who were going to the
Faire ; and bidding her good Morrow, afked her if
fhe went to the Faire. Yea, mary, qd. me, I am a poore
Mans Child that is out of Seruice, and 1 heare that at
the Statute, Folkes doe come of Purpofe to hire Ser-
uants. True it is, faid the Maidens, and thither goe
we for the fame Purpofe, and would be glad of your
Company. With a good Will, and I am right glad of
yours, faid fhe, befeeching you, good Maidens, you will
doe me the Fauour, to tell me what Service were befl
for me : for the more too blame my Parents, they
would neuer put me forth to know any Thing. Why
what can you doe ? (quoth the Maidens) can you brew
and bake, make Butter and Cheefe, and reape Corne
well ? No verily, faid Margaret, but I would be right
glad to learne to doe any Thing whatfoever it be. If
you could fpin or card, faid another, you might do
excellent well with a Clothier, for they are the befl
Seruices that I know ; there you fhall be fure to fare
well, and fo live merrily.

Then

The pleafant Hiftorie

Then Margaret wept, faying, alas, what fhall I doe ?
I was neuer brought vp to thefe r\ hings. What, can
you doe nothing ? quoth they. No truly (quoth (he)
that is good for any Thing, but I can read and write,
and fowe, fome Skill I haue in my Needle, and a little
on my Lute : but this, I fee, will profit me nothing.
Good Lord, quoth they, are you bookifh ? wee did
neuer heare of a Maide before that could reade and
write. And although you can doe no other Thing,
yet poffible you may get a Seruice, if you can behaue
your felfe manerly. I pray you, qd. another, feeing
you are bookifh, will you doe fo much as to reade a
Love-Letter that is fent me ? for I was at a Friends of
mine with it, and he was not at Home, and fo I know
not what is in it. I pray you let me fee it, quoth
Margaret, and I will fhew you. Whereupon fhe
readeth as followeth.

f^\ Ienny, my Joy, I die for thy Loue,

And now I heare fay that thou doft remoue :
And therefore, Ienny, I pray thee recite,
Where fhall I meete thee foone at Night ?

For why, with my Mailer no more will I flay,
But for thy Loue I will runne away :
O, Ienny, Ienny, thou puttefl me to paine,
That thou no longer wilt here remaine.

I will

of Thomas of Reading.

I will weare out my Shooes of Neats-Leather,
But thou and I will meete together,
And in fpight of Fortune, Rat, or Moufe,
We will dwell together in one Houfe.

For who doth not Efteeme of thee,
Shall haue no Seruice done of me :
Therefore, good Ienny, haue a Care,
To meete poore Fragment at the Faire.

Now, alas, good Soule (quoth Ienny) I thinke he be
the kindeft young Man in the World. The Reft an-
fwered, that he*feemed no lefle, and furely it appeareth
that he is a pretty witty Fellow, quoth one of them,
how finely hee hath written his Letter in Rime ; truft
me, I will giue you a good Thing, and let me haue a
Copy of it to fend to my Sweet-heart : that you fhall
with all my Heart : & fo comming to the Faire, they
tooke vp their Standing.

Within a while after, Goodwife Gray of Glocefter
came thither to ftore her felfe of diuers Commodities :
and when fhe had bought what fhe would, fhe told
her Neighbour (he had great Need of a Maid-Servant
or Twaine : therefore, qd. fhe, good Neighbour goe
with me, and let me haue your Opinion. With a good
Will, faid her Neighbour, and together they went,
and looking and viewing the Maidens ouer, fhe tooke

fpeciall

D

The pleafant Hiftorie

fpeciall Notice of Margaret. Belieue me, quoth fhe,
there Hands a very proper Maiden, and one of a mo-
dell and comely Countenance. Verily, faid her Neigh-
bour, fo fhe is, as ever I looket upon.

The Maiden feeing them to view her fo well, was
fo abafhed, that a fcarlet Colour ouerfpred her lilly
Cheekes, which the Woman perceiuing, came vnto
her, and alked if (he were willing to ferue. The Maid
with a low Curtefie, and a mod gentle Speech, anfwer-
ed, it was the onely Caufe of her comming. Can you
fpinne or card ? faid Good-wife Gray. Truly, Dame,
faid fhe, though my Cunning therein be but fmall, my
Good-will to learne is great, and I truft my Diligence
mall content you. What Wages will you take ? quoth
Good-wife Gray. I will referre that, faid Margaret,
to your Confcience and Courtefie, defiring no more
then what I {hall deferue. Then alking what Coun-
try-woman ihe was, the Maiden wept, faying, Ah,
good Dame, I was untimely borne in Shropfhire, of
poore Parents, and yet not fo needy as unfortunate,
but Death hauing ended their Sorrowes, hath left me
to the Cruelty of thefe enuious Times, to finifh my
Parents Tragedy with my Troubles. What, Maiden,
qd. her Dame, haue you a Care to doe your Bufines,
and to live in God's Feare, and you fhall haue no
Care to regard Fortunes Frownes, and fo they went

Home together.

Now,
6

of Thomas of Reading.

Now, fo foone as the Good-man faw her, hee afked
his Wife where fhe had that Maiden ? She faid, at the
Faire. Why then, quoth he, thou haft brought all the
Faire away, and I doubt it were better for vs, to fend
the Faire to another Towne, than to keepe the Faire
here. Why, Man, quoth fhe, what mean you by that ?
Woman, I meane this, that fhe will prove a Loadftone,
to draw the Hearts of all my Men after her, & fo
we fhall have wife Seruice done of all Sides. Then
faid his Wife, I hope, Hufband, Margaret will haue
a better Care both to her owne Credit, and our Com-
modity then fo, and fo let her alone to looke to fuch
Matters. Is thy Name Margaret ? quoth her Mafter :
proper is thy Name to thy Perfon, for thou art a
Pearle indeed, orient, and rich in Beauty.

His Wife hearing him fay fo, began to change her
Opinion : What, Hufband (quoth fhe) is the Wind at
that Doore ? Begin you to like your Maid fo well ?
I doubt I had moft need to looke to your felfe : be-
fore God, I had rather then an Angeli I had chofen
fome other : but heare you, Maid, you fhall packe
hence, I will not nourifh a Snake in my Bofome, and
therefore get you gone, I will none of you, provide a
Service where you may.

The Maiden hearing her fay fo, fell downe on her
Knees, and befought her, faying, O, fweet Dame, be
not fo cruell to me, to turne me out of Doores, now :

alas.

The pleafant Hiftorie

alas, I know not where to goe, or what to doe, if you
forfake me. O let not the fading Beauty of my Face
difpoile me of your Fauour : for rather then that fhall
hinder my Seruice, this my Knife fhall foone disfigure
my Face, and I will banifh Beauty as my greatefl
Enemy. And with that her aboundant Tears flopped
her Speech, that fhe could not utter one Word more.
The Woman feeing this, could not harbour any
longer, nor could her Matter flay in the Roome for
weeping. Well, Margaret, faid her Dame (little
knowing that a Lady kneeled before her) vfing thy-
felfe well, I will keepe thee, and thou fhalt haue my
Good-will if thou gouern thyfelfe with Wifedome ; &
fo fhe fent her about her BufinefTe. Her Hufband
comming to Supper faid, How now, Wife, art thou fo
doubtfull of me, that thou hafl put away thy Maiden ?
I wis (qd. fhe) you are a wife Man, to fland praifing
of a Maidens Beauty before her Face ; & you a wife
Woman, qd. he, to grow iealous without a Caufe. So
to Supper they went, and becaufe Margaret fhewed
her felfe of finefl Behaviour aboue the Reft, fhe was
appointed to waite on the Table. And it is to be vn-
derftood, that Gray did neuer eate his Meat alone, but
flill had fome of his Neighbours with him, before
whom he called his Maid, faying, Margaret, come
hither. Now becaufe there was another of the fame
Name in the Houfe, fhee made Anfwer, I call not you,

Maiden,

of Thomas of Reading.

Maiden, quoth he, but Margaret with the lilly-white
Hand. After which Time fhe was euer called fo.

How the Kings Maiejiie fent for the Clothiers, and of

the fundry Fauours which he did them. Chap. 4.
JZ ING Henry providing for his Voyage into France,
againft King Lewis and Robert Duke of Norman-
die his owne Brother, committed the Gouernment of
the Realme in his Abfence, to the Bifhop of Salisbury,
a Man of great Wifdome and Learning, whom the
King efteemed highly, and afterward he thought good
to fend for the chiefe Clothiers of England, who ac-
cording to the Kings Appointment came to the Court,
and hauing Licence to come before his Maieftie, he
fpake to this Effect.

The Strength of a King is the Loue and Friendfhip
of his People, and he gouernes ouer his Realme moft
furely, that ruleth Juftice with Mercy : for he ought
to feare many, whom many doe feare : therefore the
Gouernours of the Commonwealth ought to obferue
two fpeciall Precepts : the One is, that they fo main-
taine the Profit of the Commons, that whatfoeuer in
their Calling they doe, they referre it thereunto : the
other, that they be alwayes as well carefull ouer the
whole Common- wealth, as ouer any Part thereof;
left, while they uphold the one, the other be brought

to vtter Decay.

And

The pleafant Hiftorie

And forafmuch as I doe vnderftand, and haue part-
ly feene, that you the Clothiers of England are no
fmall Benefit to the Wealth-publike, I thought it good
to know from your owne Mouthes, if there be any
Thing not yet granted that may benefit you, or any
other Thing to be remoued that doth hurt you.

The great Defire I haue to maintaine you in your
Trades, hath mooued me hereunto. Therefore boldly
fay what you would haue in the one Thing or the
other, & I will grant it you.

With that, they all fell downe vpon their Knees,
and defired God to faue his Maieftie, and withall, re-
quelled three Dayes Refpit to put in their Anfwere :
which was granted. And thereupon they departed.

When the Clothiers had well confidered of thefe
Matters, at length they thought meete to requeft of
his Maieftie for their firft Benefit, that all the Cloth-
Meafures thorow the Land might be of one Length,
whereas to their great Difadvantage before, euery
good Towne had a feuerall Meafure, the Difficulty
thereof was fuch, that they could not keepe th~m in
Memory, nor know how to keepe their Reckonings.
The fecond Thing whereof they found themfelves
grieved, was this, that the People would not take
crackt Money, though it were neuer fo good Silver ;
whereupon it came to pane, that the Clothiers and
diuers Others, receiuing great Summes of Money, doe

. take

of Thomas of Reading.

take among it much crackt Money, it ferued them to no
Vfe, becaufe it would not goe current, but lay upon
their Hands without Profit or Benefit, whereof they
prayed Reformation. The Third was a Griefe, where-
of Hodgekins of Halifax complained, and that was,
That whereas the Towne of Halifax lived altogether
upon Cloathing, and by the Reafon of falfe Borderers,
and other euill-minded Perfons, they were oft robbed,
and had their Clothes carried out of their Fields,
where they were drying : That it would pleafe his
Maieftie to graunt the Towne this Priuiledge, That
whatfoeuer he was that was taken dealing their Cloth,
might prefently without any further Tryall be hanged
vp. When the Day of their Appearance approached,
the Clothiers came before the King, and deliuered vp
their Petition in writing, which his Maieftie moft gra-
cioufly perufing, faid, hee was ready to fulfill their
Requeft : and therefore for the firft Point of their
Petition, he called for a StafFe to be brought him, and
meafuring thereupon the iuft Length of his own Arme,
delivered it to the Clothiers, faying, This Meafure
mail be called a Yard, and no other Meafure thorow-
out all the Realme of England fhall be vfed for the
fame, and by this fhall Men buy and fell, and we will
fo provide, that whofoever he be that abufeth our Sub*
ie&s by any falfe Meafure, that he fhall not onely pay
a Fine for the fame to the King, but alfo haue his

Body

The pleafant Hiftorie

Body punifhed by Imprifonment. And as concern-
ing the fecond Point of your Petition, becaufe of my
fudden Departure" out of the Land, I know not better
how to eafe you of this Griefe, (of crackt Money) this
Decree I make, becaufe they account crackt Money
not current, I fay, none fhall be current but crackt
Money. And therefore I will give prefent Charge,
that all the Money thorow the Land fhall be flit, and
fo you fhall fufFer no Loffe.

But now for your lafl Requefl: for the Towne of
Halifax : where by Theeves your Clothes are fo often
ftolne from you, feeing the Lawes already prouided in
that Cafe, are not fufficient to keepe Men in awe, it is
indeed high Time to haue fharper Punifhment for
them.

With that Hodgekins vnmannerly interrupted the
King, faying in broad Northerne Speech, Yea, gude
Faith, mai Liedg, the faule Eule of mai Saule, giff any
Thing will keepe them whiat, till the Karles be hang-
ed up by the Cragge. What the Dule care they for
boaring their Eyne, fea lang as they may gae groping
vp and downe the Country like faufe lizar Lownes,
begging and cracking ?

The King fmiling to heare this rough-hewne Fel-
low make this Reply : Content thee, Hodgekins, for
we will have RedrefTe for all : and albeit that hanging
of Men was neuer feene in England, yet feeing the

corrupt

of Thomas of Reading.

corrupt World is growne more bold in all Wicked-
neffe, I think it not amifle to ordaine this Death for
fuch Malefactors : and peculiarly to the Towne of
Halifax I give this Priviledge, That whofoeuer they
finde dealing their Cloth, being taken with the Goods,
that without further Iudgement, they mail be hanged
vp.

Thus (faid our King) I haue granted what you re-
queft, and if hereafter you find any other Thing that
may be good for you, it fhall be granted ; for no long-
er would I defire to Hue among you, than I haue
Care for the good of the Commonwealth : at which
Words ended, the King rofe from his royal 1 Throne,
while the Clothiers on their Knees prayed for both
his Health and happy Succefle, and fhewed themfelves
molt thankfull for his HighnefTes Fauour. His Ma-
ieftie bending his Body towards them, that at his
Home Returne, he would (by the Grace of God) vifit
them.

How the Clothiers had prouided a fumptuous Feq/i for
the Kings Sonnes, Prince William and Prince Robert,
at Gerrards Hall : Jhewing alfo what Chance befell
Cutbert of Kendall at that fame Inflant. Chap. 5.
HHE Clothiers departing from the Court in a merry

-*- Mind, ioyfull of their good SuccefTe, each one to
other praifed and magnified the Kings great Wife-

e dome

The pleafant Hiftorie

dome and Vertue, commending alfo his Affability and
gentle Difpofition, fo that Hodgekins affirmed on his
Faith, that hee had rather fpeake to the Kings Maief-
tie, than to many Juftices of Peace. Indeed (faid Cole)
he is a moft mild and mercifull Prince, and I pray
God he may long raigne ouer us. Amen faid the

Reft.

Then faid Cole, My Mafters, mall we forget the
great Courtefie of the Kings Sonnes, thofe fweet and
gentle Princes, that ftill fhewed us Fauour in our
Suite? In my Opinion, it were Reafon to gratifie
them in fome Sort, that we may not vtterly bee con-
demned of Ingratitude: wherefore (if you thinke
good) we will prepare a Banquet for them at our Oaft
Garrats, who, as you know, hath a faire Houfe, and
goodly Roomes : Befides, the Man himfelfe is a moll
couragious Mind and good Behaviour, fufficient to
entertain a Prince ; his Wife alfo is a dainty fine
Cooke : all which confidered, I know not a fitter
Place in London. Tis true, quoth Sutton, and if the
Reft be content, I am pleafed it mail be fo. At this
they all anfwered, Yea j for, quoth they, it will not be
paffing Forty Shillings a Piece, and that we fhall re-
couer in our crackt Money.

Being thus agreed, the Feaft was prepared. Tom
Doue, quoth they, we will commit the prouiding of
Muficke to thee : and I, faid Cole, will inuite diuers

of

of Thomas of Reading.

B'

of our Merchants and their Wiues to the fame. That
is well remembred, faid Gray. Vpon this they called
to their Oaft and Oafteffe, fhewing their Determina-
tion, who mofl willingly faid, all Things mould be
made ready, but I would haue two Dayes Liberty,
faid the Good-wife, to prepare my Houfe and other
Things. Content, faid the Clothiers, in the meane
Space we will bid our Guefts, and difpatch our other
Affaires. But Simon of Southhampton charged his
OafleiTe, that in any Cafe fhe mould not forget to
make good Store of Pottage. It fhall be done, quoth
ihe.

It is to be remembered, that while this Preparation
was in hand, that Cutb. of Kendall had not forgot his
Kindnes to his Oafteffe of Bofoms Inne. Therefore
finding Time conuenient when her Hufband was over-
feeing his Hay-makers, hee greeted her in this Sort,
Sweet Oafteffe, though I were the laft Time I was in
Towne over-bold with you, ' yet I hope it was not fo
offenfive to you as you made fhew for. Bold, my
Cutbert ? quoth fhe, thou haft vowed thy felf my Ser-
uant : and fo being, you are not to bee blamed for
doing what I wild you. By my Honefty, I could not
chuse but smile to my felfe, fo foone as I was out of
their Sight, to thinke how prettily you began to brab-
ble. But now, quoth he, we will change our Chidings

to

The plea fa nt Hiftorie

to Killings, and it vexeth me that thefe Cherry Lipps
mould be fubiect to fuch a Lobcocke as thy Huf-
band.

Subiecl to him ? quoth me ; in faith, Sir, no, I will
haue my Lips at as much Liberty as my Tongue, the
one to fay what I lift, and the other to touch whom I
like : In Troth, fhall I tell thee, Cutbert, the Churles
Breath fmeles fo ftrong, that I care as much for kifling
of him, as for looking on him : it is fuch a mis-fhapen
Mifer, and fuch a Bundle of Beaftlinefle, that I can
neuer thinke on him without fpitting. Fie upon him,
I would my Friends had carried me to my Grave,
when they went with me to the Church, to make him
my Hufband. And fo fhedding a few diffembling
Teares, fhe ftopt. What, my fweet Miftrefle, (quoth
he) weepe you ? Nay, fit downe by my Side, and I
will fing thee one of my Countrey Jigges to make thee
merry. Wilt thou in Faith ? (quoth fhe.) Yes, verily,
faid Cutbert : And in Troth, quoth fhe, if you fall a
finging, I will fing with you. That is well, you can
fo fuddenly change your Notes, quoth Cutbert, then
haue at it.

Man. T ONG haue I lou'd this bonny Laffe,
Yet durft not fhew the fame.

Worn. Therein you proue your felfe an Affe,

Man. I was the more to blame.

Yet

of Thomas of Reading.

Yet ftill will I remaine to thee,
Trang dilly do, trang dilly :
Thy Friend and Louer fecretly,
Worn. Thou art my owne fweet Bully.

Man. But when fhall I enjoy thee,

Delight of thy faire Loue ?
Worn. Euen when thou feeft that Fortune doth

All manner Lets remoue.
Man. O, I will fold thee in my Armes,

Trang dilly do, trang dilly,
And keepe thee fo from fudden Harmes,
Worn. Thou art my owne fweet Bully.

Worn. My Hufband he is gone from Home,

You know it very well.
Man. But when will he returne againe ?
Worn. In Truth I cannot tell.

If long he keepe him out of Sight,

Trang dilly do, trang dilly,
Be fure thou fhalt haue thy Delight,
Man. Thou art my bonny Lame.
While they were fmging this Song, her Husband
being on a fudden come Home, flood fecretly in a
Corner and heard all, and blemng himfelfe with both
his Hands, faid, O abominable Difiimulation ! mon-
ilrous Hypocrifie ! and are you in this Humour ? can

1 1 you

The pleafant Hiftorie

you brawle together and fing together? Well, qd.
hee, I will let them alone, to fee a little more of their
Knauery. Neuer did Cat watch Moufe fo narrowly
as I will watch them. And fo going into the Kitchen,
he afked his Wife if it were not Dinner-time. Euen
by and by, Hufband, (quoth fhe) the Meat will be
ready. Prefently after comes in Hodgekins and Mar-
tin, who ftraight afked for Cutbert of Kendall. Anfwer
was made, that he was in his Chamber. So when they
had called him, they went to Dinner : then they re-
quefted that their Oaft and Oafteffe would fit with
them.

Hufband, faid fhe, you may goe if you pleafe : but
as for me, I will defire Pardon. Nay, Good-wife, goe
vp, faid her Hufband. What, Woman, you muft beare
with your Guefts. Why, Hufband, qd. fhe, doe you
thinke that any can beare the Flirts and Fromps which
that Northerne Tike gaue me the lafl Time he was in
Towne ; now, God forgiue me, I had as liefe fee the
Diuell as to fee him : therefore, good Hufband, goe
vp your felfe, & let me alone, for in Faith, I fhall
neuer abide that Jacke while I liue. Vpon thefe Words
away went her Hufband, and though he faid little, he
thought the more. Now when he came up, his Guefts
bade him welcome. I pray you fit downe, good mine
Oaft, quoth they j where is your Wife ? What will
fhe fit with vs ? No, verily, faid he, the foolifh Wo-
man

of Thomas of Reading.

man hath taken fuch a Difpleafure againft Cutbert,
that fhe fvveares fhe will neuer come in his Company.
Is it fo ? faid the other, then trull me we are well
agreed : and I fweare by my Fathers Sole, qd. hee,
that were it not meere for Good-will to you, then
Loue to her, I would neuer come to your Houfe
meere. I belieue it well, faid old Bofome. And fo with
other Communication they droue out the Time, till
Dinner was ended.

After they were rifen, Martin & Hodgekins got
them forth about their Affaires, but Cutb. took his
Oafl by the Hand, faying, My Oaft, He goe talke with
your Wife : for my Part I thought we had bin Friends :
but feeing her Stomacke is fo big, and her Heart fo
great, I will fee what fhe will fay to me ; and with that
he ftept into the Kitchen, faying, God fpeed you,
Oaftis. It rauft be when you are away then, faid fhe.
What is your Reafon ? faid the other. Becaufe God
neuer comes where Knaues are prefent. Gip, goodly
Draggletaile, qd. he, had I fuch a Wife, I would pre-
fent her Tallow-Face to the Deuill for a Candle. With
that fhe bent her Browes, & like a fury of Hell began
to flie at him, faying, Why, you gag-tooth Jacke, you
blinking Companion, get thee out of my Kitchen
quickly, or with my powdred Beefe-Broth I will make
your Pate as bald as a Fryers.

Get

rn

The pleafant Hiftorie

Get me gone ? quoth he, thou fhalt not bid me
twice : out, you dirty Heeles ! you will make your
Hufbands Haire growe thorow his Hood I doubt : and
with that he got him into the Hall, and fat him downe
on the Bench by his Oaft, to whom hee faid, 'Tis
pittie, my Oaft, that your aged Yeeres, that loues
Quietneffe, mould be troubled with fuch a fcolding
Queane. I, God help me, God help me, quoth the
old Man, and fo went towards the Stable : which his
Wife watching, fuddenly flept out and gaue Cutbert a
Kiffe.

Within an Hour after, the old Man craftily called
for his Nag to ride to Field : but as foone as he was
gone, Cutbert and his OaftefTe were fuch good Friends,
that they got into one of the Ware-houfes, and lockt
the Doore to them : but her Hufband hauing fet a
Spie for the Purpofe, fuddenly turned backe, and call-
ed for a Capcafe which lay in the Warehoufe. The
Seruant could not find the Key by any Meanes.
Whereupon hee called to haue the Locke broke open.
Which they within hearing, opened the Doore of their
owne Accord. So foone as her Hufband efpied her in
that Place, with Admiration he faid, O Paffion of my
Heart, what doe you here ? what, you Two that can-
not abide one another, what make you fo clofe toge-
ther ? is your Chiding and Rayling, Brabling and

Brauling,

of Thomas of Reading.

o

Brauling, come to this * O what Diflemblers are thefe !
Why, my Oaft, qd. Cutbert, what need you take the
Matter fo hot ? I gaue a Cheefe to my Country-man,
Hodgekins, to lay vp, and deliuered it to your Wife to
be keept ; and then is it not Reafon that me mould
come and feeke me my Cheefe ? O, quoth the old
Man, belike the Dore was lockt, becaufe the Cheefe
mould not run away. The Doore, faid his Wife, un-
known to vs clapt to it felfe, and hauing a Spring-
Locke, was prefently fall. Well, Hufwife, qd. he, I
will giue you as much Credit as a Crocadile, but as
for your Companion, I will teach him to come hither
to looke Cheefes.

And with that he caufed his Men to take him pre-
fently, and to bind him Hand and Foot. Which being
done, they drew him vp in a Bafket into the Smoky
Louer of the Hall, and there they did let him hang all
that Night, euen till the next Day Dinner-time, when
he fhould haue beene at the Banquet with the Princes :
for neither Hodgekins nor Martin could intreat their
inflamed Oaft to let him downe.

And in fuch a Heate was hee driuen with drawing
him vp, that he was faine to caft off his Gownes, his
Coates, and two Paire of his Stockings, to coole him-
felfe, making a Vow, he mould hang there feven
Yeeres, except the Kings Sons came in Perfon to beg
his Pardon, which moll of all grieued Cutb. When

f Cole

\

The pleafant Hiftorie

Cole and the Reft of the Weftern Yeomen heard here-
of, they could not chufe but laugh, to thinke that he
was fo taken tardy.

The young Princes hauing giuen Promife to be with
the Clothiers, kept their Houre, but when all the Reft
went to giue them Entertainment, Simon was fo bufie
in fupping his Pottage, that he could not fpare fo much
Time. Which when the Princes faw, with a fmiling
Countenance they faid, Sup, Simon, theres good Broth :
Or elfe befhrew our Oaftefle, quoth he, neuer looking
behind him to fee who fpake, till the Prince clapt him
on the Shoulder. But, good Lord, how blanke he
was when hee fpied them, knowing not how to excufe
the Matter.

Well, the Princes hauing ended their Banket, Gar-
rat comes, and with One of his Hands tooke the Ta-
ble of Sixteen Foote Long quite from the Ground
ouer their Heads, from before the Princes, and fet it
on the other Side of the Hall, to the great Admira-
tion of all them that beheld it.

The Princes being then ready to depart, the
Clothiers moued them in pleafant Maner, to be good
to One of their Company, that did neither fit, lie, nor
ftand. Then he mult needs hang, qd. the Princes.
And fo he doth, moft excellent Princes, qd. they ; and
therewithall told them the whole Matter. When they
heard the Storie, downe to Bofomes Inne they goe,

where

of Thomas of Reading.

where looking vp into the Roofe, fpied poore Cutbcrt
pinned vp in a Bafket, and almoft fmoaked to Death,
who although he were greatly afhamed, yet mod piti-
fully defired that they would get him Releafe.

What is his Trefpaffe ? faid the Prince. Nothing,
if it fhall like your Grace, qd. he, but for looking for
a Cheefe : But hee could not find it without my Wife,
faid the Good-man : the Villaine had lately dined with
Mutton, and could not digeft his Meate without Cheefe,
for which Caufe I haue made him to fall thefe twenty
Houres, to the End he may haue a better Stomacke to
eate his Dinner, then to vfe Dalliance.

Let me intreate you, quoth the Prince, to releafe
him: and if euer hereafter you catch him in the
Corne, clappe him in the Pownd. Your Grace fhall
requefl or command any Thing at my Hand, faid the
old Man : and fo Cutbert was let downe vnbound, but
when he was loofe, he vowed neuer to come within
that Houfe more. And it is faid, the old Man Bofome
ordained, that in Remembrance of this Deed, euery
Yeere once all fuch as came thither to afk for Cheefes,
fhould be fo ferued : which Thing is to this Day
kept.

How

The pleafant Hiftorie

How Simons Wife of Southampton, being wholy bent to

Pride and Pleafure, requejied her Hujband to fee

London, which being granted, how /he got Good-wife

Sutton of Salifbury to goe with her, who tooke Crab

to go along with them, and how he prophejied of many

Things, Chap. 6.

r I ''HE Clothiers being all come from London, Sut-

tons Wife of South-hampton, who was with her

Husband very mery and pleafant, brake her Mind vn-

to him in this Sort :

Good Lord, Hulband, will you neuer be fo kind as
let me goe to London with you ? (hail I be pend vp
in South-hampton, like a Parrat in a Cage, or a Capon
in a Coope ? I would requeft no more of you in Lieu
of all my Paines, Carke and Care, but to haue one
Weeks Time to fee that faire City : what is this Life,
if it be not mixt with fome Delight ? and what Delight
is more pleafing then to fee the Fafhions and Maners
of unknowne Places ? Therefore, good Hufband, if
thou loueft me, deny not this fimple Requeft. You
know I am no common Gadder, nor haue oft troubled
you with Trauell. God knowes, this may be the laffc
Thing that euer I fhall requeft at your Hands.

Woman, quoth he, I would willingly fatisfie your
Defire, but you know it is not conuenient for both of
vs to be Abroad, our Charge is fo great, and there-
fore

of Thomas of Reading.

fore our Care ought not be fmall. If you will goe
your felfe, One of my Men fhall goe with you, and
Money enough you fhall haue in your Purfe : but to
goe with you my felfe, you fee my Bufineffe will not
permit me.

Hufband, faid fhe, I accept your gentle Offer, and
it may be I fhall intreat my Goffip, Sutton, to goe
along with me. I fhal be glad, qd. her Hufband, pre-
pare your felfe when you will.

When fhe had obtained this Licence, fhe fent her
Man Welfell to Salifbury, to know of Good-wife Sutton
if fhee would keepe her Company to London. Suttons
Wife being as willing to goe, as fhe was to requeft,
neuer refted till fhee had gotten Leaue of her Huf-
band ; the which when fhe had obtained, cafting in
her Mind their Pleafure would bee fmall, being but
they Twaine : thereupon the wily Woman fent Letters
by collericke Cracke, her Man, both to Grayes Wife,
and Fitzallens Wife, that they would meet them at
Reading, who liking well of the Match, confented,
and did fo prouide, that they met according to Promife
at Reading, and from thence with Coles Wife they
went altogether, with each of them a Man to London,
each one taking vp their Lodging with a feuerall
Friend.

When the Merchants of London vnderftood they
were in Towne, they inuited them euery Day Home

to

The pleafant Hiftorie

to their owne Houfes, where they had delicate good
Cheere : and when they went Abroad to fee the Com-
modities of the City, the Merchants Wiues euer bore
them Company, being attired moft dainty and fine :
which when the Clothiers Wiues did fee, it grieued
their Hearts they had not the like.

Now when they were brought into Cheapfide, there
with great Wonder they beheld the Shops of the
Goldfmiths ; and on the other Side, the wealthy Mer-
cers, whofe Shops mined with all Sorts of coloured
Silkes : in Watling-flreet they viewed the great Num-
ber of Drapers : in Saint Martins, Shoomakers : at
Saint Nicholas Church, the Flefh Shambles : at the
End of the Old Change, the Fifh-mongers : in Can-
dleweeke-ftreet, the Weauers : then came into the
Jewes-ftreet, where all the Jewes did inhabite : then
came they to Blackwel-hall, where the Country
Clothiers did vfe to meete.

Afterwards they proceeded, and came to S. Pauls
Church, whofe Steeple was fo hie, that it feemed to
pierce the Clowdes, on the Top whereof was a great
and mighty Weather-cocke of cleane Silver, the which
notwithflanding feemed as fmall as a Sparrow to Mens
Eyes, it flood fo exceeding High, the which goodly
Weathercocke was afterwards ftolen away by a cun-
ning Cripple, who found Meanes one Night to climb
vp to the Top of the Steeple, and tooke it downe :

with

of Thomas of Reading.

with the which, and a great Summe of Money which
he had got together by begging in his Life-time, he
builded a Gate on the North-fide of the City, which
to this Day is called Cripple-gate.

From thence they went to the Tower of London,
which was builded by lulius Ce/ar, who was Emperour
of Rome. And there they beheld Salt and Wine,
which had lyen there euer fince the Romanes inuaded
this Land, which was many Yeeres before our Sauiour
Chrift was borne j the Wine was growne fo thicke,
that it might haue beene cut like a Jelly. And in that
Place alfo they faw the Money that was made of Lea-
ther, which in ancient Time went current amongft
the People.

When they had to their great Contentation beheld
all this, they repaired to their Lodgings, hauing alfo
a fumptuous Supper ordained for them, with all De-
light that might be. And you mall vnderftand, that
when the Country Weauers, which came vp with their
Dames, faw the Weauers of Candlewike-ftreet, they
had great Defire prefently to haue fome Conference
with them ; & thus one began to challenge the other
for Workemanlhip : quoth Weafell, He worke with
any of you all for a Crowne, take if you dare, and he
that makes his Yard of Cloth fooneft, fhall haue it.
You fhall be wrought withall, faid the other, and if it
were for ten Crownes : but we will make this Bar-

gaine,

The pleafant Hiftorie

gaine, that each of vs fhall winde their owne Quilles.
Content, quoth Weafell : and fo to worke they went,
but Weafell loft. Whereupon another of them tooke
the Matter in Hand, who loft likewife : fo that the
London Weauers triumphed againft the Country, caft-
ing forth diuers Frumps.

Alas, poore Fellowes, quoth they, your Hearts are
good, but your Hands are ill. Turn, the Fault was in
their Legs, quoth another : Pray you, Friend, were
you not borne at Home ? Why doe you alke ? quoth
Weafell. Becaufe, faid hee, the biggeft Place of your
Legge is next to your Shooe.

Cutbert hearing this, being cholericke of Nature,
chafed like a Man of Law at the Barre, & he wagers
with them foure Crownes to twaine : the Others
agreed, to worke they goe : but Crab conquered them
all. Whereupon the London Weauers were nipt in
the Head like Birds, and had not a Word to fay.

Now, faith Crab, as we haue loft Nothing, fo you
haue wonne Nothing, & becaufe I know you cannot
be right Weauers, except you be Good-fellowes, there-
fore if you will goe with us, we will beftow the Ale
vpon you. That is fpoken like a Good-fellow and like
a Weauer, quoth the other. So along they went as
it were to the Signe of the Red Crofle.

When they were fet downe, & had drunke well,
ihey began merrily to prattle, and to extoll Crab ot

the

of Thomas of Reading.

the Skies. Whereupon Crab protefted, that hee would
come and dwell among them. Nay, that muft not be,
faid a London Weauer : the King hath giuen us Pri-
uiledge, that none mould live among vs, but fuch as
ferue feuen Yeeres in London. With that Crab, ac-
cording to his old Maner of prophefying, faid thus :

rr,HE Day is very neere at Hand,

When as the King of this faire Land,
Shal priuiledge you more then fo :
Then Weauers mail in Skarlet goe,

And to one Brotherhood be brought,
The Firft is in London wrought,
When other Tradefmen by your Fame,
Shall couet all to doe the fame.

Then mall you all live wondrous well,
But this one Thing I mail you tell :
The Day will come before the Doome,
In Candleweeke-ftreet mail (land no Loome

Nor any Weauer dwelling there,
But Men that mall more Credit beare :
For Clothing fhall be fore decayde,
And Men vndone that vfe that Trade,

And

The pleafant Hiftorie

And yet the Day fome Men {hall fee,
This Trade againe fhall raifed be.
When as Bayliffe of Sarum Towne,
Sail buy and purchafe Bilhops Downe.

When there neuer Man did fow,
Great Store of goodly Corne fhall grow ;
And Woad, that makes all Colours found,
Shall fpring vpon that barren Ground.

At that fame Day, I tell you plaine,
Who fo aliue doth then remaine,
A proper Maiden they fhall fee,
Within the Towne of Salilburie,

Of Fauour fweet, and Nature kind,
With goodly Eyes, and yet flarke Blind,
This poore blind Maiden, I doe fay,
In Age fhall goe in rich Array.

And he that takes her to his Wife,
Shall lead a ioyfull happy Life,
The wealthieft Clothier fhall he be
That euer was in that Country.

But Clothing kept as it hath beene,
In London neuer fhall be feene :

For

of Thomas of Reading.

For Weauers then the moft mall win,
That worke for Clothing next the Skin.

Till Pride the Common-wealth doth peele,
And caufeth Hufwiues leaue their Wheele.
Then Pouerty vpon each Side,
Vnto thofe Workemen mall betide.

At that Time, from Eagles Neft,
That proudly builded in the Weft,
A Sort fhall come with cunning Hand,
To bring ftrange Weauing in this Land,

And by their Gaines that great will fall,
They fhall maintaine the Weauers Hall :
But long they fhall not flourifh fo,
But Folly with them ouerthrow.

And Men fhall count it mickle Shame,
To beare that Kind of Weauers Name :
And this as fure fhall come to pafle,
As here is Ale within this Glaffe.

When the filly Soules that fate about him heard
him fpeake in this Sort, they admired and honoured
Crabbe for the fame. Why, my Maflers, faid Weafell,
doe you wonder at thefe Words ? he will tell you

Twenty

The pleafant Hiftorie

Twenty of thefe Tales, for which Caufe we call him
our Canuas Prophet. His Attire fits his Title, faid
they, and we neuer heard the like in our Liues : and
if this mould be true, it would be ftrange. Doubt not
but it will be true, qd. Weafell ; for He tell you what,
he did but once fee our Nicke kiffe Nel, and prefently
he powred out this Rime :

That Kiffe, O Net, God giue thee Ioy,
Will nine Months hence breed thee a Boy.

And He tell you what, you mail heare : we kept
Reckoning, and it fell out as iuft as Jones buttocks on a
Clofe-ftoole ; for which Caufe our Maids durft neuer
kiffe a Man in his Sight : vpon this they broke Com-
pany, & went euery One about his Bufines, the Lon-
don Weauers to their Frames, and the Country Fel-
lowes to their Dames, who, after their great Banquet-
ting and Merriment, went euery one Home to their
own Houfes, though with leffe Money then they
brought out, yet with more Pride.

Efpecially Simons Wife of South-hampton, who told
the Reft of her Goffips, that flie faw no Reafon, but
that, their Hufbands mould maintain them as well as
the Merchants did their Wiues : for I tell you what,
quoth fhe, we are as proper Women (in my Conceit,)
as the proudeft of them all, as handfome of Body, as
faire of Face, our Legs as well made, and our Feete
as fine : then what Reafon is there (feeing our Huf-
bands

of Thomas of Reading

»■

bands are of as good Wealth) but we fhould be as well
maintained ?

You fay true, Goffip, faid Sattons Wife : truft me,
it made me blufh, to fee them braue it out fo gallantly,
and wee to goe fo homely : but before God, faid the
other, I will haue my Hufband to buy me a London
Gowne, or in Faith he fhall haue little Quiet : fo (hall
mine, faid another : and mine too, qd. the Third :
and all of them fing the fame Note : fo that when they
came Home, their Hufbands had no little to doe : ef-
pecially Simon, whofe Wife daily lay at him for Lon-
don Apparell, to whome he faid, Good Woman, be
content, let vs goe according to our Place and Ability :
what will the Bailiffes thinke, if I mould prancke thee
vp like a Peacocke, and thou in thy Attire furpaffe
their Wiues ? they would either thinke I were mad, or
elfe that I had more Money then I could well ufe :
confider, I pray thee, good Wife, that fuch as are in
their Youth Mailers, doe proue in their Age flarke
Beggers.

Befide that, it is enough to raife me vp in the Kings
Booke, for many Times Mens Coffers are iudged by
their Garments : why, we are Country Folks, and
mull keepe our felues in good Compaffe : gray Ruffet,
and good Hempe-fpun Cloth doth befl become vs ; I
tell thee, Wife, it were as vndecent for vs to goe like
Londoners as it is for Londoners to goe like Courtiers.

What

The pleafant Hiftorie

"What a Coyle keepe you ? quoth (he, are not we
Gods Creatures as well as Londoners ? and the Kings
Subie&s, as well as they ? then, finding our Wealth to
be as good as theirs, why fhould we not goe as gay as
Londoners ? No, Hufband, no, here is the Fault, wee
are kept without it, onely becaufe our Hufbands be not
fo kind as Londoners : why, Man, a Cobler there
keeps his Wife better then the befl Clothier in this
Countrey : nay, I will affirm it, that the London Oyf-
ter-wiues, and the very Kitchen-ftuffe Cryers, doe ex-
ceed vs in their Sundaies Attire : nay, more then that,
I did fee the Water-bearers Wife, which belongs to
One of our Merchants, come in with a Tankerd of
Water on her Shoulder, and yet Half a Dozen Gold
Rings on her Fingers. You may then thinke, Wife,
(quoth he) fhe got them not with Idleneffe.

But, Wife, you muft confider what London is, the
chiefs and capitall City of all the Land, a Place on the
which all Strangers caft their Eyes, it is (Wife) the
Kings Chamber and his Maieflies royall Seate : to
that City repaires all Nations vnder Heauen. There-
fore it is mofl meete and conuenient, that the Citizens
of fuch a City mould not goe in their Apparell like
Peafants, but for the Credit of our Country, weare
fuch feemely Habits as doe carry Grauity and Come-
linefTe in the Eyes of all Beholders. But if wee of the
Country went fo (quoth me) were it not as great Cre-
dit

of Thomas of Reading:.

O"

dit for the Land as the other ? Woman, qd. her Huf-
band, it is altogether needleffe, and in diuers Refpects
it may not be. Why then, I pray you, quoth fhe, let
us goe dwell at London. A Word foone fpoken, faid
her Hufband, but not fo eafie to be performed : there-
fore, Wife, I pray thee hold thy Prating, for thy Talke
is foolifh : yea, yea, Hufband, your old churlifh Con-
ditions will neuer be left, you keepe me here like a
Drudge and a Droile, and fo you may keepe your
Money in your Purfe, you care not for your Credit,
but before I will goe fo like a Shepheardeffe, I will
firfl goe naked : and I tell you plaine, I fcorne it
greatly, that you mould clap a gray Gowne on my
Backe, as if I had not brought you Two-pence : be-
fore I was married, you fwore I Ihould haue any Thing
that I requefted, but now all is forgotten. And in
faying this, fhe went in, and foone after fhe was fo
ficke, that needes fhe mufl goe to Bed : and when fhe
was laid, fhe draue out that Night with many grieuous
Groanes, Sighing and Sobbing, and no Reft fhe could
take God wot. And in the Morning when fhe fhould
rife, the good Soule fell downe in a Swowne, which
put her Maidens in a great Fright, who running downe
to their M after, cryed out, Alas, alas, our Dame is
dead ! our Dame is dead ! The Good-man hearing
this, ran vp in all Haft, and there fell to rubbing and

chafing

The pleafant Hiftorie

chafing of her Temples, fending for aqua vita, and
faying, Ah, my Sweet-heart, fpeake to me, Good-wife,
alacke, alacke ! call in the Neighbours, you Queanes,
quoth he. With that fhe lift vp her Head, fetching a
great Groane, and prefently fwouned againe, and
much a doe ywis, he had to keepe Life in her : but
when fhe was come to her felfe, How doft thou, Wife ?
qd. he. What wilt thou haue ? for Gods fake tell me
if thou haft a Mind to any Thing, thou fhalt haue it.
Away, Diffembler ! (qd. me) how can I beleeue thee ?
thou haft faid to me as much a hundred Times, and
deceiued me ; it is thy Churiifhneffe that hath killed
my Heart, neuer was Woman matcht to fo unkind a
Man.

Nay, Good- wife, blame me not without Caufe :
God knoweth how heartily I loue thee. Loue me ?
no, no, thou didft neuer carry my Loue but on the
Tip of thy Tongue, quoth fhe ; I dare fweare thou
defireft Nothing fo much as my Death, and for my
Part, I would to God thou hadft thy Defire : but be
content, I fhall not trouble thee long : and with that
fetching a Sigh, fhee fwouned and gaue a great
Groane. The Man feeing her in this Cafe, was
woundrous woe : but fo foone as they had recouered
her, he faid, O my deare Wife, if any bad Conceit
hath ingendered this Sickeneffe, let me know it ; or if
thou knowft any Thing that may procure thy Health,

let

of Thomas of Reading.

o

let me vnderftand thereof, and I proteft thou malt
haue it, if it cofl me all that ever I haue.

O Hufband, quoth ihe, how may I credit your
Words, when for a paltry Sute of Apparell you deny-
ed me ? Well, Wife, quoth he, thou fhalt haue Ap-
parell or any Thing elfe thou wilt requeft, if God fend
thee once Health. O Hufband, if I may find you fo
kind, I fhall think my felfe the happieft Woman in the
World, thy Words haue greatly comforted my Heart,
mee thinketh if I had it, I could drink a good Draught
of Renifh Wine. Well, Wine was fent for : O Lord,
faid flie, that I had a Piece of a Chicken, I feele my
Stomacke defirous of fome Meate. Glad am I. of that,
faid her Hufband ; and fo the Woman within a few
Dayes after that was very well.

But you fhall vnderftand, that her Hufband was
faine to dreffe her London-like, ere he could get her
quiet, neither would it pleafe her except the StufFe was
bought in Cheapfide : for out of Cheapfide nothing
would content her, were it neuer fo good : infomuch,
that if fhe thought a Taylor of Cheapfide made not
her Gowne, fhe would fweare it were quite fpoiled.

And hauing thus wonne her Hufband to her Will,
when the Reft of the Clothiers Wiues heard thereof,
they would be futed in the like Sort too : fo that euer
fince, the Wiues of South-hampton, Salifbury, of Glo-

h cefter,

The pleafant Hiftorie

teller, Worcefter, and Reading, went all as gallant
and as braue as any Londoners Wiues.

How the Clothiers fent the King Aide into France, and
how he ouercame his Brother Robert, and brought
him into England, and how the Clothiers feajled his
Maiejly and his Sonne at Reading. Chap. 7.

THE Kings Maieftie being at the Warres in France,
againft Lewis the French King, and Duke Robert
of Normandy, fending for diuers Supplies of Souldiers
out of England, the Clothiers at their owne proper
Coft fet out a great Number, and fent them ouer to
the King.

Which Roger Bimop of Salisbury, who gouerned
the Realme in the Kings Abfence, did certifie the
King thereof, with his Letters written in their Com-
mendations.

And afterward it came to pane, that God fent his
Highness Vi£lory ouer his Enemies, and hauing taken
his Brother Prifoner, brought him moft ioyfully with
him into England, and appointed him to be kept in
Gardife Caflle Prifoner, yet with this Fauour, that he
might hunt and hawke where he would vp and downe
the Country, and in this Sort he liued a good while,
of whom we will fpeake more at large hereafter.

The King being thus come Home, after his Winters

Reft,

of Thomas of Reading.

Reft, he made his Summers ProgrefTe into the Weft-
countrey, to take a View of all the chief Townes :
whereof the Clothiers being aduertifed, they made
great Preparation againft his comming, becaufe he had
promifed to vifit them all.

And when his Grace came to Reading, he was en-
tertained and receiued with great Ioy and Triumph :
Thomas Cole being the chief Man of Regard in all the
Towne, the King honoured his Houfe with his prince-
ly Prefence, where during the Kings Abode, he and
his Sonne and Nobles were highly feafted.

There the King beheld the great Number of Peo-
ple, that was by that one Man maintained in Worke,
whofe hearty AfFe&ion and Loue towards his Maief-
tie did well appeare, as well by their outward Coun-
tenances, as their Gifts prefented vnto him. But of
Cole himfelfe the King was fo well perfwaded, that he
committed fuch truft in him, and put him in great
Authority in the Towne. Furthermore the King faid,
That for the Loue which thofe People bore him liuing,
that hee would lay his Bones among them when he
was dead. For I know not, faid he, where they may
be better beflowed, till the bleffed Day of Refurrec-
tion, than among thefe my Friends, which are like to
be happy Partakers of the fame.

Whereupon his Maiefty caufed there to be builded
a moft goodly and famous Abbey : in which he might

mew

The plea Pant Hiftorie

mew his Deuotion to God, by increafing his Seruice,
and leaue Example to other his Succeflbrs to doe the
like. Likewife within the Towne he after builded a
faire and goodly Caftle, in the which he often kept
his Court, which was a Place of his chiefe Refidence
during his Life, faying to the Clothiers, that feeing he
found them fuch faithfull Subie&s, he would be their
Neighbour, and dwell among them.

After his Maiefties royall Feafting at Reading, he
proceeded in ProgrelTe, till he had vifited the whole
Weft-countries, being wondroufly delighted to fee
thofe People fo diligent to apply their Bufmeffe : and
comming to Salifbury, the Bifhop receiued his Maief-
ty with great Ioy, and with Triumph attended on his
Grace to his Palace, where his Highnefle lodged.

There Sutton the Clothier prefented his Highnefle
with a Broad Cloth, of fo fine a Threed, and exceed-
ing good Workmanfhip, and therewithall of fo faire a
Colour, as his Grace gaue Commendation thereof,
and, as it is faid, he held it in fuch high Eftimation,
that thereof he made his Parliament Robes, & the
firft Parliament that was euer in England was graced
with the Kings Perfon in thofe Robes, in Requitall
whereof his Highnes afterward yeelded Sutton many
princely Fauours.

And it is to be remembered, that Simon of South-
hampton (feeing the King had ouerpaft the P'ace

where

of Thomas of Reading.

&■

where he dwelt) came with his Wife and Seruants to
Salifbury, and againft the K. going forth of that City,
hee caufed a moll pleafant Arbour to be made vpon
the Toppe of the Hill leading to Salifburie, befet all
with red and white Rofes, in fuch Sort, that not any
Part of the Timber could be feene, within the which
fat a Maiden attired like a Queen, attended on by a
faire Traine of Maidens, who at the Kings Approach
prefented him with a Garland of fweet Flowres, yeeld-
ing him fuch Honour as the Ladies of Rome were
wont to doe to their Princes after their Victories :
which the King tooke in gracious Part, and for his
Farewell from that Country, they bore him Company
ouer Part of the Plaine, with the Sound of diuers fweet
Inftruments of Muficke. All which, when his Grace
vnderftood was done at the Cofl of a Clothier, he faid
he was the mofl honoured by thofe Men, aboue all the
meane Subiecls in his Land : & fo his Llighnes paft
on to Exceter, hauing giuen great Rewards to thefe
Maidens.

Thomas Doue and the Refidue of the Clothiers,
againft his Graces comming thither, had ordained di-
uers fumptuous Shewes ; firft, there was One that
prefented the Perfon of Augujius Cefar the Emperour,
who commanded after the Romane Inuafion, that their
City mould be called Augujius, after his owne Name,

which

The plcafant Hiftorie

which before Time was called J/ca9 and of later Yeeres
Exeter.

There his Maiefly was royally feafled feuen Dayes
together, at the onely Coll of Clothiers, but the diuers
Delightes and fundry Paflimes which they made there
before the King, and his Nobles, is too long here to
be rehearfed, and therefore I will ouerpaffe them to
auoid TedioufnefTe.

His Grace then coafling along the Country, at laft
came to Glocefler, an ancient City, which was build-
ed by Gloue, a Britifh King, who named it after his
owne Name, Glocefler. Here was his Maiefly enter-
tained by Gray the Clothier, who profefl himfeife to
be of that ancient Family of Grayes, whofe firfl Origi-
nall iffued out of that ancient and honorable Caflle
and Towne of Rithin.

Here was the King mofl bountifully feafled, hauing
in his Company his Brother Robert (although his Pri-
foner the fame Time.) And his Grace being defirous
to fee the Maidens card and fpinne, they were of Pur-
pofe fet to their Worke : among whom was faire Mar-
garet with her white Hand, whofe excellent Beauty
hauing pierct the Eyes of the amorous Duke, it made
fuch an Impreflion in his Heart, that afterward he
could neuer forget her : and fo vehemently was his
Affection kindled, that he could take no Reft, till by

writing

of Thomas of Reading.

D

writing he had bewrayed his Minde : but of this we
will fpeake more in another Place : and the King at
his Departure faid, that to gratifie them, hee would
make his Sonne Robert their Earle, which was the
firft Earle that euer was in Glocefter.

Now when his Grace was come from thence, he
went to Worcefter, where William Fitz-allen made
Preparation in all honourable Sort to receiue him,
which Man being borne of great Parentage, was not
to learne how to entertaine his Maieflie, being de-
fc ended of that famous Family, whofe Patrimony lay
about the Towne of Ofweftrie, which Towne his Pre-
deceflbrs had inclofed with ftately Walls of Stone.

Although aduerfe Fortune had fo grieuoufly frown-
ed on fome of them, that their Children were fain to
become Tradefmen, whofe Hands were to them in
(lead of Lands, notwithflanding God raifed againe the
Fame of this Man, both by his great Wealth, and alfo
in his Poflerity, whofe eldefl Son Henry, the Kings
God-fon, became afterward the Maior of London,
who was the firft Maior that euer was in that City,
who gouerned the fame 23 Yeeres : and then his Son
Roger Fitz-allen was the fecond Maior.

The princely Pleafures that in Worcefter were
fhewn the King, were many and maruelous, and in no
Place had his Maiefty receiued more Delight then
here : for the which at his Departure he did fhew

himfelfe

The pleafant Hiftorie

himfelfe very thankefull. Now when his Grace had
thus taken View of all his good Townes weft-ward,
and in that Progrefle had vifited thefe Clothiers, he
returned to London, with great Ioy of his Commons.

How Hodgekins of Hallifax came to the Court, and
complained to the King, that his Priuiledge was no-
thing worth, hecaufe when they found any Offender,
they could not get a Hangman to execute him : and
how by a Fryer a Gin was deuifed to chop off" Mens
Heads ofitfelfe. Chap. 8.

A FTER that Hodgekins had got the Priuiledge for
■*^the Towne of Halifax, to hang vp fuch Theeues
as ftole their Cloth in the Night, prefently without
any further Iudgement, all the Clothiers of the Towne
were exceeding glad, and perfwaded themfelues, that
now their Goods would be fafe all Night, without
watching them at all, fo that whereas before, the
Towne maintained certaine Watchmen to keepe their
Cloth by Night, they were hereupon difmiffed as a
Thing needleffe to be done, fuppofing with them-
felves, that feeing they mould be ftraight hanged that
were found faulty in this Point, that no Man would
be fo defperate to enterprife any fuch Aft. And in-
deed the Matter being noyfed through the whole
Country, that they were ftraight to be hanged that

vfe

of Thomas of Reading.

vfe fuch Theeuery, it made many lewd Liuers to re-
ftraine fuch Theeuery.

Neuertheles, there was at that fame Time liuing, a
notable Theefe named Wallis, whom in the North they
called Mighty Wallis, in regard of his Valour and
Manhood : This Man being mod fubtile in fuch Kind
of Knauery, hauing heard of this late Priuiledge, and
therewithall of the Townes Security, faid that once he
would venture his Necke for a Packe of Northerne
Cloth : and therefore comming to One or Two of his
Companions, he aiked if they would be Partners in his
Aduenture, and if (quoth he) you will herein hazard
your Bodies, you fhall be Sharers in all our Booties.

At length by many Perfwafions the Men confented :
whereupon late in the Night, they got them all into a
Farriours Shop, and called vp the Folkes of the
Houfe. What the foule ill wald you haue (quoth
they) at this Time of the Night ? Wallis anfwered,
faying, Good-fellowes, we would haue you to remoue
the Shooes of our Horfes Feete, and fet them on againe,
and for your Paines you fhall be well pleafed. The
Smith at length was perfwaded, and when he had
pluckt off all the Shooes from their Horfes Feete, they
would needs haue them all fet on againe, quite con-
trary with the Cakins forward, that mould ftand back-
ward. How ? fay, fay, Man, qd. the Smith, are ye
fike Fules ? what the Deele doe you meane to breake

your
i

The pleafant Hiftorie

your Crags ? gud Faith, I tro the Men be wood. Not
fo, Smith, qd. they, do thou as we bid thee, & thou
malt haue thy Money : for it is an old Prouerbe,
Be it better, or be it worfe,
Pleafe you the Man that beares the Purfe.

Gud Faith and fee I fall, qd. the Smith, and fo did
as hee was willed. When Wallis had thus caufed their
Horfes to be fhod, to Hallifax they went, where they
without any Let, laded their Horfes with Cloth, and fo
departed contrary Way.

In the Morning, fo foone as the Clothiers came to
the Field, they found that they were robt, whereupon
one ranne to another to tell thefe Things. Now when
Hodgekins heard thereof, rifing up in Halle, he wild
his Neighbors to marke and fee, if they could not def-
cry either the Foot-fleppes of Men or Horfes. Which
being done, they perceiued that Horfes had beene
there, and feeking to purfue them by their Foot-
fleppes, they went a cleane contrary Way, by Reafon
that the Horfes were fhodde backward : and when in
vaine they had long purfued them, they returned,
being neuer the neere. Now Wallis vfed his Feate fo
long, that at length he was taken, and Two more with
him : whereupon, according to the Priuiledge- of the
Towne, they put Halters about the Theeues Neckes
prefently to hang them vp.

When

of Thomas of Reading.

-

When they were come to the Place appointed,
Wallis and the Reft being out of Hope to efcape
Death, prepared themfelves patiently to fuffer the
Rigor of the Law. And there with the Reft laying
open the Lewdneffe of his Life, grieuoufly lamenting
for his Sinnes, at length commending their Soules to
God, they yeelded their Bodies to the Graue, with
which Sight the People were greatly mooued with
Pity, becaufe they had neuer feene Men come to hang-
ing before : but when they mould haue beene tyed
vp, Hodgekins willed one of his Neighbours to play
the Hang-mans Part, who would not by any Meanes
doe it, although he was a very poore Man, who for
his Paines mould haue beene pofleft of all their Ap-
parell. When he would not yeeld to the Office, one
of thofe which had his Cloth ftolen, was commanded
to doe the Deed ; but he in like Maner would not,
faying, When I haue the Skill to make a Man, I will
hang a Man, if it chance my Workemanfhip doe not
like me.

And thus from one to another, the Office of the
Hang-man was polled off. At laft a Rogue came by,
whom they would haue compelled to haue done that
Deed. Nay, my Mafters, qd. he, not fo : but as you
haue got a Priuiledge for the Towne, fo you were bell
to procure a Commiffion to make a Hang-man, or elfe
you are like to be without for me. Neighbor Hodge-
kins,

The pleafant Hiftorie

kins, quoth one, I pray you doe this Office your felfe,
you haue had moft Lofie, and therefore you fhould be
the moft ready to hang them your felfe. No, not I,
(quoth Hodgekins,) though my Loffe were ten Times
greater than it is ; notwithstanding look which of thefe
Theeues will take upon him to hang the other, fhall
haue his Life faued, otherwife they fhall all to Prifon
till I can prouide a Hangman.

When Wallis faw the Matter brought to this paffe,
he began ftoutly to reply, faying, My Mafters of the
Towne of Halifax, though your Priuiledge Itretch to
hang Men vp prefently that are found ftealing of your
Goods, yet it giues you no Warrant to imprifon them
till you prouide them a Hang-man: my felfe, with
thefe my Fellowes, haue here yeelded our felues to
fatisfie the Law, and if it be not performed, the Fault
is yours, and not ours, and therefore we humbly take
our Leaue : from the Gallowes the xviii. of Auguft.
And with that he leapt from the Ladder, and hurl'd
the Halter at Hodgekins Face.

When the Clothiers faw this, they knew not what
to fay, but taking them by the Sleeues, entreated to
haue their owne againe. Not fo, qd. Wallis, you get
not the Value of a Placke or a Bawby : we haue ftolne
your Cloth, then why do you not hang vs ? here we
haue made our felues ready, and if you will not hang
vs, chufe. A Plague upon you, quoth he, you haue

hindred
6

of Thomas of Reading.

hindred me God knowes what : I made Account to
dine this Day in Heauen, and you keepe me here on
Earth, where there is not a Quarter of that good
Cheare. The foule Euill take you all; I was fully
prouided to giue the Gallowes a Boxe on the Eare,
and now God knowes when I fhall be in fo good a
Minde againe : and fo he, with the Reft of his Com-
panions, departed.

When Hodgekins faw, that notwithstanding their
Theeuery, how they flowted at their Lenity, he was
much mooued in Minde : and as he flood in his
Dumps chewing his Cud, making his Dinner with a
Difh of Melancholy, a Gray Fryer reuerently faluted
him in this Sort : All haile, good-man Hodgekins,
HappinefTe and Health be euer with you, and to all
Suppreffors of lewd Liuers, God fend euerlafting
Ioyes.

I am forry, Good-man Hodgekins, that the great
Priuiledge which our King gaue to this Towne comes
to no greater Purpofe : better farre had it beene that
it had neuer beene granted, then fo lightly regarded :
the Towne hath fuffered through their owne Peeuifh-
nefTe, an euerlafting Reproch this Day, onely becaufe
foolifh Pitty hath hindred Juftice.

Confider, that Compamon is not to be had vpon
Theeues and Robbers : Pity onely appertained to the
vertuous Sort, who are ouerwhelmed with the Waues

of

The pleafant Hiftorie

of Mifery and Mifchance. What great Caufe of Bold-
neffe haue you giuen to bad Liuers, by letting thefe
Fe^owes thus to efcape, and how mall you now keepe
your Goods in Safety, feeing you fulfill not the Law,
which mould be your Defence? neuer thinke that
Theeues will make any Confcience to carry away your
Goods, when they find them felues in no Danger of
Death, who haue more Caufe to praife your Pity, then
commend your Wifedome : wherefore in Time feeke
to preuent the enfuing Euill.

For my owne Part, I haue that Care of your Good,
that I would worke all good Meanes for your Benefit,
and yet not fo much in refpect of your Profit, as for
the Defire I haue to vphold Juftice, and feeing I finde
you and the Reft fo womanifh, that you could not find
in your Hearts to hang a Theefe, I have deuifed how
to make a Gin, that fhall cut off their Heads without
Mans Helpe, and if the King will allow thereof.

When Hodgekins heard this, he was fomewhat com-
forted in Mind, and faid to the Fryer, that if by his
cunning he would performe it, he would once againe
make Sute to the King to haue his Grant for the fame.
The Fryer willed him to haue no Doubt in him : and
fo when he had deuifed it, he got a Carpenter to frame
it out of Hand.

Hodgekins in the meane Time polled vp to the
Court, and told his' Maiefty that the Priuiledge of

Hallifax

of Thomas of Reading.

Hallifax was not worth a Pudding. Why fo ? faid the
King. Becaufe, quoth Hodgekins, we can get neuer a
Hangman to truffe our Theeues : but if it mall like
your good Grace, (quoth he) there is a feate Fryer,
that will make vs a Deuice, which fhall without the
Hand of Man cut off the Cragges of all fuch Carles,
if your Maiefty will pleafe to allow thereof.

The King vnderflanding the full Effect of the Mat-
ter, at length granted his Petition : whereupon till this
Day it is obferued in Hallifax, that fuch as are taken
flealing of their Cloth, haue their Heads chopt off with
the fame Gin.

How the Bailiffes of London could get no Man to bee a
Catchpole, and how certaine Flemings took that Office
vpon them, whereof many of them were Jledde into this
Realme, by Reafon of certaine Waters that had drown-
ed a great Part of their Country, Chap. 9.
HPHE City of London being at that Time gouerned
by Bailiffes, it came to paffe, that in a certaine
Fray two of their Catch-poles were killed, for at that
Time they had not the Name of Sergeants : and you
fhall underftand, that their Office was then fo much
hated and detefted of Englifhmen, that none of them
would take it vpon him : fo that the Bailiffes were
glad to get any Man whatfoeuer, and to giue him cer-
tain Wages to performe that Office.

It

The pleafant Hiftorie

It came to pane, as I faid before, that Two of their
Officers by arrefting of a Man, were at one Inflant
flaine, by Meanes whereof the BailifFes were enforced
to feek Others to put in their Roomes, but by no
Meanes could they get any, wherefore according to
their wonted Manner, they made Proclamation, that
if there were any Man that would prefent himfelfe
before them, he mould not onely be fettled in that
Office during their Liues, but alfo mould haue fuch
Maintenance and Allowance, as for fuch Men was by
the City prouided : & notwithflanding that it was an
Office moft neceffary in the Commonwealth, yet did
the pooreft Wretch defpife it, that liued in any Efti-
mation among his Neighbours.

At laft, a Couple of Flemings, which were fled into
this Land, by Reafon that their Country was drowned
with the Sea, heering the Proclamation, offered them-
felues vnto the BaylifFes, to ferue in this Place, who
were prefently receiued and accepted, & according to
order had Garments giuen them, which were of 2
Colors, blue & red their Coates, Breeches, & Stock-
ings, whereby they were known and difcerned from
other Men.

Within Halfe a Yeere after it came to paffe, that
Thomas Doue of Exeter came vp to London, who
hauing by his Iollity and Goodfellowfhip brought him-
felfe greatly behind Hand, was in Danger to diuers

Men

of Thomas of Reading.

Men of the Cite, among the Reft, one of his Creditors
feed an Officer to arreft him. The Dutchman, that
had not beene long experienced in fuch Matters, and
hearing how many of his Fellows had beene killed for
attempting to arreft Men, ftood quiuering and quaking
in a Corner of the Street to watch for Thomas Doue,
and hauing long waited, at length he efpied him :
whereupon he prepared his Mace ready, and with a
pale Countenance proceeded to his Office ; at what
Time comming behind the Man, fuddenly with his
Mace he knockt him on the Pate, faying, I arreft
you, giuing him fuch a Blow, that he fell him to the
Ground.

The Catchpole thinking he had killed the Man, he
left his Mace behind him and ranne away : the Cre-
ditor he ran after him, calling and crying that he
mould turne againe : But the Fleming would not by
any Meanes turne backe, but got him quite out of the
City, and tooke Sanctuary at Weftminfter.

Doue being come to himfelfe, arofe and went to his
Inne, no Man hindring his Paflage, being not a little
glad he fo efcaped the Danger. Yet, neuerthelefle, at
his next comming to London, another Catchpole met
with him, and arrefted him in the King's Name.

Doue being difmayed at this mifchieuous Mifchance,
knew not what to doe : at laft hee requefted the Catch-
pole that hee would not violently caft him in Prifon,

k but

The pleafant Hiftorie

but flay till fuch Time as he could fend for a Friend
to be his Surety ; and although KindnefTe in a Catch-
pole be rare, yet was he won with faire Words to doe
him this Fauour : whereupon Doue defired one to goe
to his Oaft Iarrat, who immediately came with him,
& offered himfelfe to be Doues Surety.

The Officer, who neuer faw' this Man before, was
much amazed at his Sight : for Iarrat was a great and
mighty Man of Body, of Countenance grim, and ex-
ceeding high of Stature, fo that the Catchpole was
wonderfully afraid, afking if he could find neuer a
Surety but the Deuill, mofl fearefully intreating him
to coniure him away, and he would doe Doue any Fa-
uour. What, will you not take my Word ? qd. Iarrat.
Sir, qd. the Catchpole, if it were for any Matter in
Hell, I would take your Word as foone as any Diuels
in that Place, but feeing it is for a Matter on Earth, I
would gladly haue a Surety.

Why, thou whorfon Cricket ! (quoth Iarrat,) thou
Maggat-apie ! thou Spinner ! thou paultry Spider ! dofl
thou take me for a Deuill ? Sirra, take my Word, I
charge thee, for this Man, or elfe, goodman Butter-
fly, He make thee repent it. The Officer, while he
was in the Houfe, faid he was cotent, but as foon as
he came into the Street he cryed, faying, Helpe, helpe,
good Neighbors, or elfe the Deuill will carry away
my Prifoner : notwithftanding, there was not one Man

would

of Thomas of Reading.

o

would ftirre to be the Catchpoles Aide. Which when
he faw, he tooke faft hold on Thomas Doue, and would
not by any Meanes let him goe.

Iarrat feeing this, made no more adoe, but com-
ming to the Officer, gaue him fuch a Fillop on the
Forehead with his Finger, that he fell the poore
Fleming to the Ground : and while he lay in the
Street ftretching his Heeles, Iarrat tooke Doue vnder
his Arme and carried him Home, where he thought
himfelfe as fafe as King Charlemaine in Mount- Albon.

The next Morning Iarrat conueyed Doue out of
Towne, who afterward kept him in the Country, and
came no more in the Catchpoles Clawes.

How Duke Robert came a wooing to Margaret with the
white Hand, and how he appointed to come andjieale
her away from her Majlers. Chap. 10.
r I ^HE beautifull Margaret, who had now dwelt with
her Dame the Space of foure Yeeres, was highly
regarded and fecretly beloued of many gallant and
worthy Gentlemen of the Country, but of Two mofl
efpecially, Duke Robert, and Sir William Ferris, It
chanced on a Time that faire Margaret, with many
Others of her Mafters Folkes, went a Hay-making, at-
tired in a red Stammell Peticoate, and a broad Strawne
Hat vpon her Head ; fhe had alfo a Hay-forke, and
in her Lappe fhe did carry her Breake-faft. As fhe

went

11

The pleafant Hiftorie

went along, Duke Robert, with One or Two of his
Keepers, met with her, whofe amiable Sight did now
anew re-inkindle the fecret Fire of Loue, which long
lay fmothering in his Heart. Wherefore meeting her
fo happily, he faluted her thus friendly.

Faire Maid, good Morow ; are you walking fo di-
ligently to your Labour ? Needes muft the Weather
be faire, when the Sun mines fo cleare, and the Hay
wholefome that is dryed with fuch fplendent Rayes.
Renowned and molt notable Duke, (qd. fhe) poore
Harueft Folkes pray for faire Weather, and it is the
Laborers Comfort to fee his Worke profper, and the
more happy may we count the Day that is bleffed with
your princely Prefence. But more happy, faid the
Duke, are they which are conuerfant in thy Company.
But let me intreat thee to turne backe to thy Mailers
with me, and commit thy Forke to fome that are fitter
for fuch Toyle : truft me, me thinkes thy Dame is too
much ill-aduifed in fetting thee to fuch homely Bufines.
I mufe thou canft indure this vile befeeming Seruitude,
whofe delicate Lims were neuer framed to proue fuch
painefull Experiments.

Albeit, quoth fhe, it becommeth not me to controule
your iudicial Thoughts, yet, were you not the Duke,
I would fay, your Opinion deceiued you : though your
faire Eyes feeme cleare, yet I deemed them vnperfecl:,
if they call before your Mind any Shadow or Sparke

of

of Thomas of Reading.

-•

of Beauty in me : But I rather thinke, becaufe it hath
beene an old Saying, that Women are proud to heare
themfelues praifed, that you either fpeake this to driue
away the Time, or to wring me from my too apparant
Imperfections. But I humbly intreate Pardon; too
long haue I fore-flowed my Bufinefle, and fliewne my
felfe ouer-bold in your Prefence ; and therewith, with
a courtly Grace, bending her Knees to the courteous
Duke, fhee went forward to the Field, and the Duke
to the Towne of Glocefter.

When he came thither, he made his Keepers great
Cheare, intreating them they would giue him Refpit
to be awhile with old Gray ; for we Twaine mufl
haue a Game or Two, quoth he : and for my fafe
Return, I gage to you my princely Word, that as I
am a true Knight and a Gentleman, I will returne fafe
to your Charge againe.

The Keepers being content, the Duke departed, and
with old Gray goes to the Field, to perufe the Worke-
folkes, where while Gray found himfelfe bufie in many
Matters, he tooke Opportunity to talke with Marga-
ret ; fhee who by his Letters before was priuie to his
Purpofe, gueft beforehand the Caufeof his comming :
to whom he fpake to this effect :

Faire Maid, I did long fince manifeft my Loue to
thee by my Letter ; tell me, therefore, were it not
better to be a Dutches then Drudge ? a Lady of high

Reputation,

The pleafant Hiftorie

Reputatione, then a Seruant of fimple Degree ? With
me thou mighteft Hue in Pleafure, where here thou
drawefl thy Dayes forth in Paine ; by my Loue thou
fhouldft be made a Lady of great Treafures : where
now thou art poore and beggerly : all Manner of De-
lights mould then attend on thee, and whatfoeuer thy
Heart defireth, thou fhouldft haue : wherefore feeing
it lyes in thy owne Choice, make thy felfe happy, by
confenting to my Suite.

Sir, (quoth (he) I confeife your Loue deferues a
Ladies Fauour, your Affection a faithfull Friend, fuch
a One as could make but one Heart and Mind of two
Hearts & Bodyes ; but farre unfit it is that the Turtle
fhould match with the Eagle, though her Loue be
neuer fo pure, her Wings are unfit to mount fo high.
While Thales gazed on the Starres, he flumbled in a
Pit. And they that clime unaduifedly, catch a Fall
fuddenly : what auaileth high Dignity in Time of Ad-
verfity ? it neither helpeth the Sorrow of the Heart,
nor remoues the Bodies Mifery : as for Wealth and
Treafure, what are they, but Fortunes Baits to bring
Men in Danger ? good for nothing but to make Peo-
ple forget themfelues : & whereas you alleadge Po-
uerty to be a Hinderer of the Hearts Comfort, I find
it my felfe contrary, knowing more Surety to reft
vnder a fimple Habit, then a royall Robe : and verily
there is none in the World poore, but they that
think themfelues poore : for fuch as are indued with

Content

of Thomas of Reading.

Content are rich, hairing nothing elfe ; but he that
is poffeffed with Riches without Content, is mod
wretched and miferable. Wherefore, moft noble
Duke, albeit I account my Life vnworthy of your
lead Fauour, yet I would defire you to match your
Loue to your Like, and let me reft to my Rake, and
vfe my Forke for my Liuing.

Confider, faire Margaret, (quoth he) that it lyes
not in Mans Power to place his Loue where he lift,
being the Worke of an high Deity. A Bird was neuer
feene in Pontus, nor true Loue in a fleeting Mind :
neuer fhall remoue the Affection of my Heart, which
in Nature refembleth the Stone Abifton, whofe Fire
can neuer be cooled : wherefore, fweet Maiden, giue
not obftinate Denial, where gentle Acceptance ought
to be receiued.

Faire Sir, (quoth file) confider what high Difplea-
fure may rife by a ram Match, what Danger a Kings
Frownes may breed; my worthleffe Matching with
your Royalty may perhaps regaine your Liberty, and
hazard my Life : then call to Mind how little you
fhould enioy your Loue, or I my wedded Lord.

The Duke at thefe Words made this Reply, that if
fhe confented, fhe fhould not dread any Danger. The
Thunder (quoth he) is driuen away by ringing of
Belles, the Lions Wrath qualified by a yeelding Body :
how much more a Brothers Anger with a Brothers

Intreaty ?

The pleafant Hiftorie

Intreaty ? By me he hath receiued many Fauors, and
neuer yet did he requite any One of them : and who
is ignorant that the princely Crown which adorneth
his Head is my Right ? all which I am content he
fha!l ftill enjoy, fo he requite my Kindnefie. But if he
mould not, then would I be like thofe Men, (that eat-
ing of the Tree Lutes) forget the Country where they
were borne ; and neuer more mould this Clime couer
my Head, but with thee would I Hue in a ftrange
Land, being better content with an Egge in thy Com-
pany, then with all the Delicates in England.

The Maiden hearing this, who with many other
Words was long wooed, at laft confented ; where
yeelding to him her Heart with her Hand, he depart-
ed, appointing to certifie her from CardifFe Cattle,
what Determination he would follow : fo taking his
Leaue of Gray, he went to his Brothers, and with them
potted to CardifFe.

Now it is to be remembered, that Sir William Fer-
rers, within a Day or two after, came vnto Grayes
Houfe, as it was his ordinary Cuftome, but not fo
much ywis for Grayes Company, as for the Minde he
had to Margaret his Maiden, who although he were a
married Man, and had a faire Lady to his Wife, yet
he laid hard Siege to the Fort of this Maidens Chafti-
ty, hauing with many faire Words fought to allure
her, and by the Offer of fundry rich Gifts to tempt

her.

of Thomas of Reading.

o

her. But when me faw, that by a hundred Denials
fhe could not be rid of him, me now chanced on a
Sudden to giue him fuch an Anfwer, as droue him
from a Deceit into fuch a Conceit, as neuer after that
Time he troubled her.

Sir William Ferrers being uery importunate to haue
her grant his Defire, and when after fundry Affaults
me gaue him ftill the Repulfe, hee would needes
know the Reafon why fhee would not loue him j quoth
he, If thou didft but confider who he is that feeketh
thy Fauour, what Pleafure he may doe thee by his
Purfe, and what Credit by his Countenance, thou
wouldft neuer (land on fuch nice Points. If I be thy
Friend, who dareth be thy Foe ? and what is he that
will once call thy Name in Queftion for any Thing ?
therefore, fweet Girle, be better aduifed, and refufe
not my Offer, being fo large.

Truly, Sir William (quoth fhe) though there be
many Reafons to make me deny your Suite, yet is
there one aboue the Reft that caufes me I cannot loue
you. Now I pray thee, my Wench, let me know that,
quoth he, and I will amend it, whatfoeuer it be. Par-
don me, Sir, faid Margaret ; if I mould fpeake my
Mind, it would poffibly offend you, and doe me no
Pleafure, becaufe it is a Defecl in Nature, which no
Phificke can cure. Sir William hearing on her fo,
being abafhed at her Speech, faid, Faire Margaret,

l let

The pleafant Iliftorie

let me (if I may obtaine no more at thy Hands) yet
intreat thee to know what this Defect fhould be : I
am not wry-neckt, crook-legd, ftub-footed, lame-
handed, nor bleareeyed : what can make this Mif-
like ? I neuer knew any Body that tooke Exceptions
at my Perfon before.

And the more forry am I, quoth fhe, that I was fo
mala-pert to fpeake it ; but pardon me my Preemp-
tion, good Sir William ; I would I had beene like the
Storke, tonguelefle, then mould I neuer haue caufed
your Dif quiet. Nay, fweet Margaret, quoth he, tell
me, deare Loue, I commend thy Singlenefle of Heart,
good Margaret, fpeake. Good Sir William, let it reft,
quoth fhe ; I know you will not beleeue it when I haue
reuealed it, neither is it a Thing that you can helpe :
and yet fuch is my Foolifhnefle, had it not beene for
that, I thinke verily I had granted your Suite ere now.
But feeing you vrge me fo much to know what it is,
I will tell you : it is, Sir, your ill-fauoured great Nofe,
that hangs fagging fo lothfomely to your Lips, that I
cannot finde in my Heart fo much as to kilfe you.

What, my Nofe ! quoth he, is my Nofe fo great
and I neuer knew it ? certainly I thought my Nofe to
be as comely as any Mans : but this it is, we are all
apt to thinke well of our felues, and a great deale bet-
ter than we ought : but let me fee, my Nofe ! by the
Mafie, tis true, I doe now feele it my felfe : Good

Lord,

of Thomas of Reading.

&■

Lord, how was I blinded before ? Hereupon it is cer-
taine, that the Knight was driuen into fuch a Conceit,
as none could perfwade him but his Nofe was fo great
indeed : his Lady, or any other that fpake to the con-
trarie, he would fay they were Flatterers, and that
they lied, infomuch that he would be ready to ftrike
fome of them that commended and fpake well of his
Nofe. If they were Men of Worfhip, or any other
that contraried him in his Opinion, he would fweare
they flowted him, and be ready to challenge them the
Field. He became fo afhamed of himfelfe, that after
that Day he would neuer goe Abroad, whereby Mar-
garet was well rid of his Company.

On a Time, a wife and graue Gentleman feeing him
grounded in his Conceit fo ftrongly, gaue his Lady
Counfell, not to contrary him therein, but rather fay
that fhe would feeke out fome cunning Phyfician to
cure him : for, faid he, as Sir William hath taken this
Conceit of himfelfe, fo is he like neuer to heare other
Opinion, till his owne Conceit doth remoue it, the
which muft be wifely wrought to bring it to paffe.

Whereupon the Lady, hauing conferred with a
Phyfician that beare a great Name in the Countrey,
hee vndertooke to remoue this fond Conceit by his
Skill. The Day being appointed when the Phifician
fliould come, and the Knight being told thereof, for

very

The pleafant Hiftorie

very Ioy he would goe forth to meete him, when a
Woman of the Towne faw the Knight, hauing heard
what Rumor went becaufe of his Nofe, fhee looked
very ftedfaftly vpon him : the Knight calling his Eye
vpon her, feeing her to gaze fo wiftly in his Face, with
an angry Countenance faid thus to her, Why, how
now, good Hufwife, cannot you get you about your
Bufines ? The Woman being a fhrewifh Queane, an-
fwered him cuttedly, No, mary can I not, qd. fhe.
No, you Drab, what is the Caufe ? faid the Knight.
Becaufe, quoth fhe, your Nofe ftands in my Way :
wherewith the Knight, being uery angry and abafhed,
went back againe to his Houfe.

The Phyfician being come, he had filled a certaine
Bladder with Sheeps Blood, and conueyed it into his
Sleeue, where at the Iffue of the Bladder he had put
in a Piece of a Swans Quill, through the which the
Blood fhould runne out of the Bladder fo clofe by his
Hand, that hee, holding the Knight by the Nofe, it
might not be perceiued but that it iffued thence. All
Things being prepared, he told the Knight, that by a
foule corrupt Blood wherewith the Veines of his Nofe
were ouer-charged, his Impediment did grow, there-
fore, quoth he, to haue Redreffe for this Difeafe, you
muft haue a Veine opened in your Nofe, whence this
foule Corruption muft be taken: whereupon it will

follow,

of Thomas of Reading.

follow, that your Nofe will fall againe to his naturall
Proportion, and neuer fhall you be troubled with this
Griefe any more, and thereupon will I gage my Life.

I pray you, Mafter Doclor, faid the Knight, is my
Nofe fo big as you make it ? With Reuerence I may
fpeake it, faid the Phyfician, to tell the Truth, and
auoid Flattery, I neuer faw a more misfhapen Nofe fo
foule to Sight. Lo you now, Madam, quoth the
Knight, this is you that faid my Nofe was as well, as
handfome, and as comely a Nofe as any Mans.

Alas, Sir, qd. fhe, I fpake it (God wot) becaufe
you Ihould not grieue at it, nor take my Words in ill
Part, neither did it indeed become me to miflike of
your Nofe.

All this we will quickly remedy, faid the Phyfician,
haue no doubt : and with that he uery orderly prickt
him in the Nofe, but not in a Veine whereby he might
bleed : and prefently hauing a Tricke finely to vnflop
the Quill, the Blood ranne into a Bafon in great
Aboundance : and when the Bladder was empty, and
the Bafon almoit full, the Phyfician feemed to clofe
the Veine, and alked him how he felt his Nofe, mew-
ing the great Quantite of filthy Blood which from
thence he had taken.

The Knight beholding it with great Wonder, faid,
he thought that no Man in the World had beene trou-
bled with fuch Aboundance of corrupt Blood in his

whole

The pica fan t Hiftorie

whole Body as lay in his mif-fhapen Nofe, and there-
withall he began to touch and handle his Nofe, faying,
that he felt it mightily affwaged. Immediately a Glaffe
was brought, wherein he might behold himfelfe. Yea,
mary, qd. he, now I praife God, I fee my Nofe is
come into fome reafonable Proportion, and I feele my
felfe very well eafed of the Burthen thereof ; but if it
continue thus, thats all. I will warrant your Worfhip,
faid the Phyfician, for euer being troubled with the
like againe. Whereupon the Knight receiued great
Ioy, and the Doctor a high Reward.

How Thomas of Reading was murdered at his Oajis
Houfe of Colebrooke, who alfo had murdred many be-
fore him, and how their WickedneJJe was at length
reuealed. Chap. 11.
r V^HOMAS of Reading hauing many Occafions to
come to London, as well about his own Affaires,
as alfo the Kings Bufinefle, being in a great Office
vnder his Maieftie, it chanced on a Time, that his Oaft
and Oaftefie of Colebrooke, who through Couetouf-
neffe had murdered many of the Guefls, and hauing
euery Time he came thither great Store of his Money
to lay vp, appointed him to be the next fat Pig that
mould be killed : For it is to be vnderftood, that when
they plotted the Murder of any Man, this was alwaies
their Terme, the Man to his Wife, and the Woman to

her

of Thomas of Reading.

her Hufband : Wife, there is now a fat Pig to be had
if you want one. Whereupon fhe would anfwer thus,
I pray you put him in the Hogflie till To-morrow.
This was when any Man came thither alone without
Others in his Company, and they faw he had great
Store of Money.

This Man fhould be then laid in the Chamber right
ouer the Kitchen, which was a faire Chamber, & the
better fet out than any other in the Houfe : the bed
Bedftead therein, though it were little and low, yet
was it moll cunningly carued, and faire to the Eye,
the Feet whereof were fall naild to the Chamber
Floore in fuch Sort, that it could not in any wife fall ;
the Bed that lay therein was fall fowed to the Sides of
the Bedftead : Moreouer, that Part of the Chamber
whereupon this Bed and Bedftead Hood was made in
fuch Sort, that by the pulling out of Two Yron Pinnes
below in the Kitchen, it was to be let downe and taken
vp by a Draw-bridge, or in Manner of a Trap-doore :
moreouer in the Kitchen, directly vnder the Place
where this Ihould fall, was a mighty great Caldron,
wherein they vfed to feethe their Liquor when they
went to Brewing. Now the Men appointed for the
Slaughter were laid into this Bed, and in the dead
Time of the Night, when they were found alleepe, by
plucking out the forefaid Yron Pinnes, downe will the
Man fall out of his Bed into the boyling Caldron, and

all

The pleafant Hiftorie

all the Cloaths that were vpon him : where being fud-
denly fcalded and drowned, he was neuer'able to cry
or fpeake one Word.

Then had they a little Ladder euer (landing ready
in the Kitchen, by the which they prefently mounted
into the faid Chamber, and there clofely take away
the Mans Apparell, as alfo his Money, in his Male or
Cap-cafe : and then lifting vp the faid Falling-Floore,
which hung by Hinges, they made it faft as before.

The dead Body would they take prefently out of
the Caldron, and throw it down the River, which
ran neere vnto their Houfe, whereby they efcaped all
Danger.

Now if in the Morning any of the Reft of the Guefts
that had talkt with the murdered Man ore Eue, chanfl
to afke for him, as hauing Occafion to ride the fame
Way that he mould haue done, the Good-man would
anfwere, that he tooke Horfe a good while before Day,
and that he himfelfe did fet him forward : the Horfe
the Good-man would alfo take out of the Stable, &
conuey him by a Hay-barne of his, that flood from
his Houfe a Mile or Two, whereof himfelfe did alwaies
keepe the Keies full charily, and when any Hay was
to be brought from thence, with his owne Hands he
would deliuer it : then before the Horfe mould goe
from thence, he would difmarke him : as if he ware
a long Taile, he would make him curtail : or elfe

crop

of Thomas of Reading.

crop his Eares, or cut his Mane, or put out One of
his Eies ; and by this Meanes hee kept himfelfe vn-
knowne.

Now, Thomas of Reading, as I faid before, being
markt, & kept for a fat Pig, he was laid in the fame
Chamber of Death, but by Reafon Gray of Glocefter
chanced alfo to come that Night, he efcaped fcalding.

The next Time he came, he was laid there againe,
but before he fell afleepe, or was warme in his Bed,
one came riding thorow the Towne, and cryed pite-
oufly, that London was all on a Fire, and that it had
burned downe Thomas Beckets Houfe in Weft-cheape,
and a great Number more in the fame Street, and yet
(quoth he) the Fire is not quencht.

Which Tidings when Thomas of Reading heard, he
was very forrowfull, for of the fame Becket that Day
he had receiued a great Peece of Money, and had left
in his Houfe many of his Writings, and fome that ap-
pertained to the King alfo : therefore there was no
way but he would ride backe againe to London pre-
fently, to fee how the Matter flood, thereupon making
himfelfe ready, departed. This crofle Fortune caufed
his Oaft to frowne, neuertheleffe the next Time (qd.
he) will pay for all.

Notwithstanding God fo wrought that they were
prevented the likewife, by Reafon of a great Fray that

hapned

M

The pleafarit Hiftorie

hapned in the Houfe betwixt a Couple that fell out at
Dice, infomuch as the Murderers themfeiues were in-
forced to call him vp, being a Man in great Authority,
that he might fet the Houfe in Quietneffe, out of the
which, by Meanes of this Quarrell, they doubted to
lofe many Things.

Another Time, when hee mould haue beene laid in
the fame Place, he fell fo ficke, that he requefted to
haue fome body to watch with him, whereby alfo they
could not bring their vile Purpofe to paffe. But hard
it is to efcape the ill Fortunes whereunto a Man is al-
lotted : for albeit that the next Time that he came to
London, his Horfe ftumbled & broke One of his Legs
as he mould ride homeward, yet hired he another to
haften his owne Death ; for there is no Remedy but
he mould goe to Colebrooke that Night : but by the
Way he was heauy afleepe, that he could fcant keepe
himfelfe in the Saddle ; and when he came neere vnto
the Towne, his Nofe burft out fuddenly a Bleeding.

Well, to his Inne he came, and fo heauy was his
Heart that he could eate no Meat : his Oaft and
Oafteffe hearing he was fo melancholy, came vp to
cheare him, faying, Jefus, Matter Cole, what ayles you
to-night ? neuer did we fee you thus fad before : will
it pleafe you to haue a Quart of burnt Sacke ? With
a good Will (quoth he) and would to God Tom Doue

were

of Thomas of Reading.

were here, he would furely make me merry, and we
mould lacke no Muficke : but I am forry for the Man
with all my Heart, that he is come fo farre behind
Hand : but, alas, fo much can euery Man fay, but
what Good doth it him ? No, no, it is not Words can
helpe a Man in this Cafe, the Man had need of other
Reliefe then fo. Let me fee : I haue but one Child
in the World, and that is my Daughter, and Half that
I haue is hers, the other Halfe my Wifes. What then ?
mail I be good to no body but them ? In Confcience,
my Wealth is too much for a Couple to poifeife, and
what is our Religion without Charity ? And to whom
is Charity more to be fhewne, then to decaid Houfe-
holders ?

Good my Oaft, lend me a Pen and Inke, and fome
Paper, for I will write a Letter vnto the poore Man
ilraight ; & Something I will giue him : That Almes
which a Man beftowes with his owne Hands, he fhall
be fure to haue deliuered, and God knowes how long
I fhall liue.

With that, his Oafteffe diflemblingly anfwered, fay-
ing, Doubt not, Mafter Cole, you are like enough by
the Courfe of Nature to liue many Yeeres. God
knowes (quoth he) I neuer found my Heart fo heauy
before. By this Time Pen, Inke, and Paper was
brought, fetting himfelfe in writing as followeth.

In

The pleafant Hiftorie

I N the Name of God, Amen. I bequeath my Soule
to God, and my Body to the Ground, my Goods
equally betweene my Wife Elenor, and Ifabel my
Daughter. Item, I giue to Thomas Done of Exeter,
One Hundred Pounds ; nay, that is too little, 1 giue
to Thomas Doue Two Hundred Pounds in Money, to
be paid vnto him prefently vpon his Demand thereof,
by my faid Wife and Daughter.

Ha, how fay you, Oaft, (qd. he) is not this well ?
I pray you reade it. His Oaft looking thereon, faid,
Why, Mafter Cole, what haue you written here ? you
faid you would write a Letter, but me thinks you haue
made a Will ; what need haue you to doe thus ?
Thanks be to God, you may Hue many faire Yeeres.
Tis true, (quoth Cole) if it pleafe God, and I truft this
Writing cannot fhorten my Daies ; but let me fee,
haue I made a Will? Now, i promife you, I did
verily purpofe to write a Letter : notwithstanding, I
haue written that that God put into my Mind : but
looke once againe, my Oaft, is it not written there,
that Doue fhall haue Two Hundred Pounds, to be paid
when he comes to demand it ? Yes, indeed, faid his
Oafte. Well then, all is well, faid Cole, and it fhall
goe as it is for me. I will not beftow the new Writing
thereof any more.

Then

of Thomas of Reading.

Then folding it vp, he fealed it, defiring that his
Oaft would fend it to Exeter : he promifed that he
would, notwithflanding Cole was not fatisfied : but
after fome Paufe, he would needs hire one to carry it.
And fo fitting downe fadly in his Chaire againe, vpon
a fudden he burfl forth a weeping ; they demanding
the Caufe thereof, he fpake as followeth :

No Caufe of thefe Feares I know : but it comes
now into my Minde, (faid Cole) when I fet toward
this my laft Iourney to London, how my Daughter
tooke on, what a Coyle fhe kept to haue me flay : and
I could not be rid of the little Baggage a long Time,
fhe did fo hang about me ; when her Mother by Vio-
lence tooke her away, fhe cried out moft mainly, O
my Father, my Father, I fhall neuer fee him againe.

Alas, pretty Soule, faid his Oafteffe, this was but
meere KindnefTe in the Girle, and it feemeth fhe is
very fond of you. But, alas, why mould you grieue
at this ? you muft confider that it was but Childifh-
neffe. I, it is indeed, faid Cole, and with that he be-
gan to nod. Then they afked him if he would goe to
Bed. No, faid he, although I am heauy, I haue no
Mind to goe to Bed at all. With that certaine Mufi-
cians of the Towne came to the Chamber, and know-
ing Mafler Cole was there, drue out their Inflruments,
and very folemnly began to play.

This

The pleafant Hiftorie

This Muficke comes uery well (faid Cole) and when
he had liftned a while thereunto, he faid, Me thinks
thefe Inftrumets found like the Ring of St. Mary
Queries Bells ; but the Bafe drowns all the Reft : &
in my Eare it goes like a Bell that rings a frozen Ones
Knell, for Gods Sake let them leaue off, and beare
them this fimple Reward. The Muficians being gone,
his Oafl aiked, if now it would pleafe him to go t
Bed j for (quoth he) it is wel neere Eleuen of the
Clocke.

With that Cole, beholding his Oaft & Oafteffe
earneftly, began to ftart backe, faying, What aile you
to looke fo like pale Death ? good Lord ! what haue
you done, that your Hands are thus bloody ? What,
my Hands ? faid his Oaft ; why you may fee they are
neither bloody nor foule : either your Eyes doe great-
ly dazell, or elfe Fancies of a troubled Minde doe de-
lude you.

Alas, my Oaft, you may fee, faid hee, how weake
my Wits are ; I neuer had my Head fo idle before.
Come, let me drinke once more, and then I will to
Bed, and trouble you no longer. With that hee made
himfelfe vnready, and his Oafteffe was very diligent
to warme a KerchifFe, and put it about his Head.
Good Lord ! faid he, I am not ficke, I praife God ;
but fuch an Alteration I finde in my felfe as I neuer
did before.

With

of Thomas of Reading.

With that the Scritch-Owle cried pitioufly, and
anon after the Night- Rauen fate croking hard by his
Window. Jeiu, haue Mercy upon me, quoth hee, what
an ill-fauoured Cry doe yonder Carrion-Birds make,
and therewithall he laid him downe in his Bed, from
whence he neuer rofe againe.

His Oaft and Oaftefle, that all this while noted his
troubled Mind, began to commune betwixt themfelues
thereof. And the Man faid, he knew not what were
beft to be done. By my Confent (quoth he) the Mat-
ter mould pane, for I thinke it is not beft to meddle
on him. What, Man, quoth fhe, faint you now ? haue
you done fo many, and doe you fhrinke at this ? Then
fhewing him a great deale of Gold which Cole had left
with her, fhe faid, Would it not grieue a Bodies Heart
to lofe this ? Hang the old Churle, what mould he
doe liuing any longer ? he hath too much, and we haue
too little : tut, Hufband, let the Thing be done, and
then this is our owne.

Her wicked Counfell was followed, and when they
had liftned at his Chamber-Doore, they heard the Man
found afleepe : All is fafe, quoth they, and downe in-
to the Kitchen they goe, their Seruants being all in
Bed, and pulling out the Yron Pins, downe fell the
Bed, and the Man dropt out into the boyling Caldron.
He being dead, they betwixt them caft his Body into
the Riuer j his Clothes they made away, & made all

Things

The pleafant Hiftorie

Things as it mould be : but when he came to the
Stable to conuey thence Coles Horfe, the Stable-doore
being open, the Horfe had got loofe, and with a Part
of the Halter about his Necke, and Straw truffed vnder
his Belly, as the Ofllers had drefled him ore Eue, he
was gone out at the Back-fide, which led into a great
Field ioyning to the Houfe, and fo leaping diuers
Hedges, being a luftie flout Horfe, had got into a
Ground where a Mare was grazing, with whom he
kept fuch a Coile, that they got into the High-way,
where One of the Towne meeting them, knew the
Mare, and brought her and the Horfe to the Man that
owed her.

In the meane Space the Muficians had beene at the
Inne, and in Requitall of their Euenings Gift, they in-
tended to giue Cole fome Muficke in the Morning.
The Good-man told them he tooke Horfe before Day :
likewife there was a Gueft in the Houfe that would
haue bore him Company to Reading, vnto whom the
Oaft alfo anfwered, that he himfelfe fet him vpon
Horfebacke, and that he went long agoe. Anon came
the Man that owed the Mare, inquiring vp and downe,
to know and if none of them miffed a Horfe, who faid
no. At the laft he came to the Signe of the Crane,
where Cole lay : and calling the Oaftlers, he demand-
ed of them if they lackt none, they faid no : Why
then, faid the Man, I perceiue my Mare is good for

Something

of Thomas of Reading.

Something, for if I fend her to Field tingle, fhe will
come Home double. Thus it paffed on all that Day
and the Night following : but the next Day after,
Coles Wife, mufmg that her Hufband came not Home,
fent one of her Men on Horfe-backe, to fee if he could
meet him : and if (quoth fhe) you meet him not be-
twixt this and Colebrooke, alke for him at the Crane ;
but if you find him not there, then ride to London,
for I doubt he is either ficke, or elfe fome Mifchance
hath fallen vnto him.

The Fellow did fo9 and alking for him at Cole-
brooke, they anfwered, hee went -homeward from
thence fuch a Day. The Seruant mufing what fhould
be become of his Mailer, and making much Inquiry
in the Towne for him, at length One told him of a
Horfe that was found on the High-way, and no Man
knew whence he came. He going to fee the Horfe,
knew him prefently, and to the Crane he goes with
him. The Oafl of the Houfe perceiuing this, was
blanke, and that Night fled fecretly away. The Fellow
going vnto the Juftice, defired his Helpe : prefently
after Word was brought that larman of the Crane was
gone ; then all the Men faid, he had fure made Cole
away : & the Muficians told what larman faid to them,
when they would haue giuen Cole Muficke. Then the
Woman being apprehended & examined, confeffed the
Truth. larman foone after was taken in Windfor

n Foreft,

The pleafant Hiftorie

Foreft, he and his Wife were both hangd, after they
had laid open al thefe Things before exprefled. Alfo
he confeffed, that he being a Carpenter, made that
falfe Falling-Floore, and how his Wife deuifed it. And
how they had murdered by that Meanes Ix. Perfons.
And yet, notwithstanding all the Money which they
had gotten thereby, they profpered not, but at their
Death were found very farre in Debt.

When the King heard of this Murder, he was for
the Space of vii. Dayes fo forrowfull and heauie, as
he would not heare any Suite, giuing alfo Command-
ment, that the Houfe mould quite be confumed with
Fire wherein Cole was murdered, and that no Man
mould euer build vpon that curfed Ground.

Coles Subftance at his Death was exceeding great ;

hee had daily in his Houfe an Hundred Men Seruants

and xl. Maides ; hee maintained befide aboue Two

or Three Hundred People, Spinners and Carders, and

a great many other Houfe-holders. His Wife neuer

after married, and at her Death fhee bellowed a

mightie Summe of Money toward the maintaining of

the new-builded Monaflery. Her Daughter was moll

richly married to a Gentleman of great Worfhip, by

whom fhe had many Children. And fome fay, that

the Riuer whereinto Cole was caft, did euer fince car-

rie the Name of Cole, being called, The Riuer of Cole,

and the Towne of Colebrooke.

How

of Thomas of Reading.

How diuers of the Clothiers Wiues went to the Churching
of Suttons Wife of Salisbury, &f of their Merriment.
Chap. 12.

OVTTONS Wife of Salifbury, which had lately bin
^deliuered of a Sonne, againft her going to Church
prepared great Cheare : at what Time Simons Wife of
Southampton came thither, and fo did diuers others of
the Clothiers Wiues, onely to make merry at this
Churching Feaft : and whileft thefe Dames fate at the
Table, Crab, Weafell, and Wren, waited on the Boord ;
and as the old Prouerbe fpeaketh, Many Women
many Words, fo fell it out at that Time : for there
was fuch Prattling that it paffed : fome talkt of their
Hufbands Frowardnes, fome mewed their Maids Slut-
tiihnes, other fome deciphered the Cofllines of their
Garments, fome told many Tales of their Neighbours :
and, to be briefe, there was none of them but would
haue talke for a whole Day.

But when Crab, Weafell, and Wren faw this, they
concluded betwixt themfelves, that as oft as any of the
Women had a good Bit of Meate on their Trenchers,
they offering a clean one, mould catch that Commo-
dity, and fo they did : but the Women, being bufie
in Talke, marked it not, till at the lafl one found
Leifure to mine her Meat : whereupon fhe faid, that

their

The pleafant Hiftorie

their Boldnefle exceeded their Diligence. Not fo,
forfooth, faid Weafell, there is an Hundred bolder than
we. Name me One, faid the Woman, if you can. A
Flea is bolder, quoth Crabbe. How will you proue
that ? faid the Woman. Becaufe, quoth he, they will
creepe vnder your Coates, where we dare not come,
and now and then bite you by the Buttocks, as if they
were Brawne. But what becomes of them ? qd. the
Woman; their fweet Meat hath fowre Sauce, and
their Luftines doth often cofl them their Liues, there-
fore take Heed. A good Warning of a faire Woman,
faid Wren, but I had not thought fo fine a Wit in a
fat Belly.

The Women feeing their Men fo merry, faid it was
a Signe there was good Ale in the Houfe. Thats as
fit for a Churching, quoth Weafell, as a Cudgell for a
curft Queane. Thus with pleafant Communication
and merry Quips they droue out the Time, till the
Fruit and Spice- Cakes were fet on the Boord : At
what Time one of them began to alk the other, if they
heard not of the cruell Murder of Thomas of Reading ?
What, faid the Reft, is old Cole murdred ? when, I
pray you, was the Deed done ? The other anfwered,
On Friday laft. O good Lord ! faid the Woman, how'
was it done, can you tell ?

As Report goes, faid the other, he was rofted aliue.
O pitifull ! was hee roafted ? Indeed I heard one fay,

a Man

of Thomas of Ptcadin^.

->-

a Man was murdred at London, and that hee was Sod-
den at an Inholders Houfe, and ferued it to the Guefts
in Head of Porke.

No, Neighbour, it was not at London, faid another :
I heare fay twas comming from London, at a Place
called Colebrooke ; and it is reported for Truth, that
the Inholder made Pies of him and Penny Parties, yea,
and made his owne Seruant eate a Piece of him. But
I pray you, good Neighbour, can you tell how it was
knowne : fome fav that a Horfe reuealed it.

J

Now, by the Maffe, (quoth Grayes Wife) it was told
one of my Neighbours, that a certaine Horfe did
fpeake, and told great Things. That founds like a Lie,
faid one of them. Why, faid another, may not a Horfe
fpeake, as well as Balaams AfTe ? It may be, but it is
vnlikely, faid the Third. But where was the Horfe
when he fpake ? As fome fay, qd. fhe, he was in the
Field, and had broke out of the Stable, where he flood
fall locked in mighty itrong Yron Fetters, which hee
burft in Peeces, as they had beene Strawes, and broke
downe the Stable-Doore, and fo got away. The Good-
man comming in at thefe Speeches, afked what that
was they talkt of. Marry, faid his Wife, wee heare
that Cole of Reading is murdred. I pray you is it
true ? I, faid Sutton, it is true ; that vile Villaine his
Oafl murdered him, in whofe Houfe the Man had
fpent many a Pound. But did they make Pies of him ?

faid

The pleafant Hiftorie

laid his Wife. No, no, quoth her Hufband ; he was
fcalded to death in a boiling Caldron, and afterward
throwne into a running Riuer that is hard by. But,
good Hufband, how was it knowne ? By his Horfe,
quoth hee. What, did he tell his Mailer was murder-
ed ? could the Horfe fpeake Englifh ? Jefus, what a
foolifh Woman are you, quoth he, to afke fuch a quef-
tion. But, to end this, you are all heartily welcome,
good Neighbours, and I am forry you had no better
Cheere. So with Thanks the Women departed. Thus
haue yee heard the diuers Tales that will be fpred
Abroad of an euil Deed.

How Duke Robert decerned his Keepers, & got from
them : how he met /aire Margaret, and in carrying
her away was taken, for the which he had his Eyes
put out. Chap. 13.

T"\UKE Robert hauing, as you heard, obtained the
-*^Loue of faire Margaret, did now caft in his Mind
how hee might delude his Keepers, and carry her
quite away. In the End, he being abfolutely refolued
what to doe, fent his Letter vnto her, wherein he re-
quefted, that me would be readie to meet him in the
Forreft, betwixt Cardiffe and Glocefter.

The young Lady, hauing fecretly receiued his Mef-
fage, vnknowne to her Matter or Dame, in a Morning

betime

of Thomas of Reading.

betime made her ready and got forth, walking to the
appointed Place, where her Loue mould meet her.

During her Abode there, and thinking long ere her
Loue came, fhe entred into diuers Paflions, which in-
deed prefaged fome difafter Fortune to follow. O my
deare Loue, faid fne, how flacke art thou in perform-
ing thy Promife ! Why doe not thy Deedes agree with
thy Inditing ? See, thefe are thy Words, Come, my
deare Margaret, and with Cupids fwift Wings flie to
thy Friend ; be now as nimble in thy Footing as the
Camels of Ba&ria, that runne an Hundred Miles a
Day : I will waite and flay for thee, fo I flay not too
long. There is no Country like Auftria for ambling
Horfes, & to carry thee I haue got one.

O my Loue, (quoth (he) here am I, but where art
thou ? O why doeft thou play the Trewant with Time,
who like the Wind Aides away vnfeene ? An ambling
Gennet of Spaine is too flow to ferue our Turnes. A
flying Horfe for flying Louers were molt meete. And
thus calling many Lookes thorow the Siluane Shades
vp and downe to efpie him, fhe thought euery Minute
an Houre, till fhe might fee him : fometimes fhe would
wifh her felfe a Bird, that fhe might fly through the
Ayre to meete him ; or a pretty Squirill, to clime the
highefl Tree to defcry his comming : but finding her
Wifhes vaine, fhe began thus to excufe him, and per-
fwaded her felfe, faying,

How

The pleafant Hiftorie

How much to blame am I, to finde fault with my
Friend? Alas, Men that lacke their Liberty, mull
come when they can, not when they would ; poore
Prifoners cannot doe what they defire ; and then why
mould I be fo haftie ? Therefore, if fafely I may lay
me downe, I will beguile vnquiet Thoughts with quiet
Sleepe : it is faid that Galino breeds no Serpents, nor
doth Englands Forrefls nourtfh Beares or Lyons,
therefore, without Hurt I hope I may reft awhile.
Thus leauing faire Margaret in a fweet Slumber, we
will returne to Duke Robert, who had thus plotted his
Efcape from his Keepers.

Hauing Liberty of the King to hawke and hunt,
hee determined on a Day, as hee mould follow the
Chafe, to leaue the Hounds to the Hart, and the
Hunters to their Homes, and being bufie in their
Sport, himfelfe would flie, which hee performed at
that Time when he appointed Margaret to meete him,
and fo comming to the Place, his Horfe all on a Wa-
ter, and himfelfe in a Sweat, finding his Loue afleepe,
he awaked her with a Kilfe, faying, Arife, faire Mar-
garet, now comes the Time wherein thou fhalt be
made a Queene : and prefently fetting her on Horfe-
backe, he polled away.

Now when the Keepers faw they had loft his Com-
pany, and that at the killing of the Game hee was not
prefent, they were among themfelues in fuch a Mutiny,

that
8

of Thomas of Reading.

that they were ready one to ftabbe another. It was
thy Fault, faid one, that hee thus efcapt from vs, that
hadfl more mind of thy Pleafure then of thy Prifoner,
and by this Meanes we are all undone. The other
faid as much to him, that he had thought he had fol-
lowed him in the Chafe : but leauing at laft this Con-
tention, the one pofted vp to the King, while the Others
coafled vp and downe the Country to fearch for the
Duke, who hauing kild his Horfe in travelling, was
mofl vnhappily mette on Foot with faire Margaret,
ere he could come to any Towne, where he might for
Money haue another. But when he efpyed his Keepers
come to take him, he defired Margaret to make Shift
for her felfe, and to feeke to efcape them. But fhe
being of a contrary Mind, faid, fhe would Hue and die
with him.

The Duke, feeing himfelfe ready to be furprized,
drew out his Sword, and faid, he would buy his Li-
berty with his Life, before he would yeeld to be any
more a Prifoner ; and thereupon began a great Fight
betwixt them, infomuch that the Duke had killed Two
of them : but himfelfe being fore wounded, and faint
with ouermuch bleeding, at length fell downe, being
not able any longer to ftand : and by this Meanes the
good Duke was taken with his faire Loue, & both of
them committed to Prifon.

But in the meane Space, when Crayes Wife had

o miffed

The pleafant Hiftorie

miffed her Maide, and faw fhe was quite gone, fhe
made great Lamentation for her among her Neigh-
bours, for me loued her as dearely as any Child that
euer fhe bore of her owne Body. O Margaret, (quoth
fhee) what Caufe hadfl thou thus to leaue me ? If thou
didft millike any Thing, why didft thou not tell me ?
If thy Wages were too little, I would haue mended it :
If thy Apparell had beene too fimple, thou fhouldft
haue had better : If thy Worke had bin too great, I
would haue had Helpe for thee.

Farewell, my fweet Meg, the beft Seruant that euer
came in any Mans Houfe ; many may I haue of thy
Name, but neuer any of thy Nature : thy Diligence is
much j in thy Hands I laid the whole Gouernment of
my Houfe, and thereby eafed my felfe of that Care
which now will cumber me.

Heere fhee hath left me my Keyes vnto my Chefts,
but my Comfort is gone with her Prefence : euery
gentle Word that me was wont to fpeake, comes now
into my Mind ; her courteous Behauiour mall I neuer
forget : with how fweet and modeft a Countenance
would me qualifie my ouer-haftie Nature ? It repents
my Heart that euer I fpoke foule Word vnto her. O
Meg, wert thou here againe, I would neuer chide
thee more : but I was an vnworthy Dame for fuch a
Seruant. What will become of me now, if I mould

chance

of Thomas of Reading.

&■

chance to be ficke, feeing fhe is gone, that was wont
to be both my Apoticary and Phyfician ?

Well, quoth her Neighbours, there is no Remedy
now but to reft content ; you (hall one Day heare of
her, doubt you not ; and thinke this, that fhe was not
fo good but you may get another as good, and there-
fore do not take it fo heauily. O Neighbour, blame
me not to grieue, feeing I haue loft fo great a Jewell,
and fure I am perfwaded, that fcant in a Bodies Life-
time they fhall meet with the like. •

I proteft I would circuit England round about on
my bare Feet to meet with her againe. O, my Meg
was furely ftole away from me, elfe would me not
haue gone in fuch Sort. Her Hufband, on the other
Side, grieued as much, & refted not Night nor Day,
riding vp and downe to feeke her : but fhe, poore
Soule ! is faft lockt vp in Prifon, and therefore can-
not be met withall.

But when the King vnderftood of his Brothers
Efcape, hee was maruelous wroth, giuing great Charge
and Commandement when he was taken, that both his
Eyes fhould be put out, and be kept in Prifon tit I his
dying Day : appointing alfo that the Maid mould lofe
her Life for Prefumption of louing him.

This Matter being rumored ouer all England, it
came to the Eares of Gray & his Wife, who hearing
that Margaret alfo was there in Prifon appointed to

die,

The pleafant Hiftorie

die, the good aged Woman neuer refted till fhe came
to the Court, where kneeling before the King, with
many Teares me befought his Maieftie to fpare the
Maidens Life, faying, Moft royall King, confider, I
humbly befeech you, that the Duke your Brother was
able to intice any Woman to his Loue, much more a
filly Maiden, efpecially promifing her Marriage, to
make her a Lady, a Dutcheffe, or a Queene, who
would refufe fuch an Offer, when at the Inftant they
might get both a princely Hufband and a high Digni-
ty ? If Death be a Louers Guerdon, then what is due
to Hatred ? I am in my Heart perfwaded, that had
my poore Margaret thought it would haue bred your
Highnes Difpleafure, fhe would neuer haue bought
his Loue fo deare. Had your Grace made it known
to your Commons, that it was unlawfull for any to
marry the Duke your Brother, who would haue at-
tempted fuch an Action ? If fhe had wilfully difobey-
ed your Graces Commandement, fhe might haue been
thought worthy of Death ; but feeing ignorantly fhe
offended, I befeech your Grace to recall the Sentence,
and let me flill enioy my Seruant, for neuer will I rife
till your Majeftie haue granted my Petition.

His Highnes, who was of Nature mercifull, behold-
ing the Womans aboundant Tears, tooke Pitie on her,
and granted her Suite : which being obtained, fhee
went Home in all Hafle poffible. And from thence

fhee,

of Thomas of Reading.

ihee, with her Hufband, taking their Iourney to Car-
diffe Caftle, they came at that very Inftant when the
Maiden was led toward her Death, who went in mod
ioyfull Sort to the fame, faying, that they were not
worthy to be accounted true Louers that were not
willing to die for Loue : and fo with a fmiling Coun-
tenance me patted on, as if fhe had eaten Apium Rifus^
which caufeth a Man to die laughing : but her Dame
Gray feeing her, fell about her Necke, and with many
Kiffes imbraced her, faying, Thou malt not die, my
Wench, but goe Home with me ; and for thy Deli-
uery behold here the Kings Letters ; and with that
fhe deliuered them vp to the Gouernour of the Caftle,
who reading them, found thefe Words written, Wee
pardon the Maids Life, and grant her Liberty ; but
let her not pafle till fhe fee her Louers Eyes put out,
which we will haue you doe in fuch Sort, that not
onely the Sight may perifh, but the Eye continue faire,
for which Caufe I haue fent downe Doctor Piero, that
he may execute the fame.

The Gouernour of the Caftle hauing read the Kings
Letter, faid thus to the Maiden, The Kings Maieftie
hath pardoned thy Life, and allowed thy Liberty : but
you muft not paffe before you fee your Louers Eyes
put out. O Sir, faid the Maiden, miftake not your-
felfe, they are my Eyes that muft be put out, and not

the

The pleafant Hiftorie

the Dukes : as his Offence grew by my Meanes, fo I
being guilty, ought to receiue the Punifhment.

The Kings Commandement muft be fulfilled, faid
the Gouernour : and therewithal! Duke Robert was
brought forth, who hearing that he muft lofe his Eyes,
faid thus : The noble Mind is neuer conquered by
Griefe, nor ouercome by Mifchance : but as the Hart
reneweth his Age by eating the Serpent, fo doth a
Man lengthen his Life with deuouring Sorrow : my
Eyes haue offended the King, and they muft be pu-
nifhed : my Heart is in great Fault, why is not that
killed ?

The Kings Maiefty, faid the Gouernour, fpares
your Life of meere Loue, and onely is content to fa-
tisfie the Law with the Loffe of your Eyes ; wherfore
take in good Part this Punifhment, and thinke you
haue deferued greater then is granted.

With this Margaret cryed out, faying, O my deare

Loue, moft gentle Prince, well may you wifh that I

had neuer bin borne, who by feeing of mee muft lofe

your Sight : but happie mould I count my felfe, if it

fo pleafe the King, that I might redeeme thy Eyes with

my Life : or elfe, that being an equall Offendor, I

might receiue equall Punifhment : hadft thou fuftain-

ed this Smart for fome Queene or Princeffe of high

Blood, it might with the more Eafe be borne, but to

indure

of Thomas of Reading.

indure it for fuch a one as I, it muft needs caufe a tre-
ble Grief to be increafed.

Content thee, faire Margaret, faid the Duke ; for
Honor ought to be giuen to Virtue, & not Riches :
for Glory, Honor, Nobility and Riches, without Ver-
tue, are but Clokes of Malicioufnes. And now let me
take my Leaue of thy Beauty, for neuer mull I behold
thy Face : notwithstanding I account my Eyes well
loft, in that I doe forgoe them for fo peereles a Para-
gon. Now, faire Heauens, farewell ! the Sunne,
Moone, and Starres fhall I in this World neuer be-
hold againe ; and farewell alfo the fruitfull Earth :
well may I feele thee, but thofe poore Windowes of
my Body are now denyed to view thee any more :
and though the World hath euer bin my Foe, yet will
I bid thee farewell too, & farewell all my Friends :
whiles I Hue here in this World, I muft fuppofe to
fleepe, & wake when I come in Heauen, where I hope
to fee you all againe. Yet had it pleafed the King, I
had rather haue loft my Life then my Eyes. Life,
why, what is it but a Flowre, a Bubble in the Water,
a Spanne long, and full of Miferie ? Of fuch fmall
Account is Life, that euery Souldier will fell it for
Sixpence. And truft me, I do now deteft Life worfe
then a Goat doth hate Bafill.

With that the Dodor prepared his Inftrument, and
being ready to fet to the Dukes Eyes, he faid, O ftay,

Mafter

The pleafant Hiftorie

Matter Do&or, till I haue conueyed my Loues Coun-
tenance downe into my Heart : Come hither, my Sweet,
and let me giue thee my laft Kiffe, while mine Eyes
may direct me to thy Cherry Lips. Then imbracing
her in his Armes, he faid, O that I might giue thee a
Kiffe of xx. Yeeres long, and to fatisfie my Eyes with
thy Sight : yet it doth fomewhat content me, becaufe
thou art prefent at my Punifhment, that I may hold
thee by the Hand, to comfort my Heart, at the fudden
Pricke of my Eye.

This being faid, the Doctor performed his Duty,
and fo put out the chrittall Sight : at what Time D.
Robert ftarted up, and with a moft manly Courage
faid, I mutt thank his Maieftie, that though hee de-
priue me of my Sight, yet he leaueth me Eyes to weepe
for my Sinnes. But fo foone as Margaret beheld the
Deed, fhe fell downe in a Swoune, and much a doe
her Dame had to recouer her Life : which when the
Duke underftood, hee was wondrous woe, groaping
for her with his bleeding Eyes, faying, O where is my
Loue ? for Gods Sake haue regard to her. And I pray
you moll heartily, good Wife Gray, let her haue this
Fauour for my Sake, that fhe may be vfed kindly.
And with that the Keepers led him into the Cattle,
and Margaret was carried away wondrous fick and
ill : but her Dame was moft tender ouer her ; and
would fuffer her to lacke nothing. When fhe was

fomewhat

of Thomas of Reading.

fomewhat well recouered, her Dame Gray fet her on
Horfebacke : and at her comming to Glocefler, there
was no fmall Ioy.

How Thomas Doue, being fallen to Decay, was forfaken
of his Friends, Iff defpifed of his Seruants : and how
in the End he was raifcd againe through the Liberal-
ity of the Clothiers. Chap. 14.

C VCH as feeke the Pleafure of the World follow a
Shadow wherein is no Subflance : and as the Adder
Afpis tickleth a Man to Death, fo doth vaine Pleafure
flatter vs, till it makes vs forget God, and confume
our Subflance, as by Tom Done it is apparent, who
had, through a free Heart and a liberall Minde,
wafted his Wealth ; and looke how his Goods con-
fumed, fo his Friends fled from him : And albeit he
had beene of great Ability, and thereby done good
vnto many, yet no Man regarded him in his Pouerty,
but calling a fcornefuli Countenance vpon him, they
palTed by him with flender Salutation : neither would
any of his former Acquaintance do him Good or plea-
fure him with the Value of a Farthing j his former
Friendfhip done to them was quite forgot, and he
made of as much Account as lob when he fate on the
Dunghill.

Now when his wicked Seruants faw him in this

p Difgrace

The pleafant Hiftorie

Difgrace with the World, they on the other Side be-
gan to difdaine him. Notwithstanding that hee (to his
great Coil) had long Time brought them vp, yet did
they Nothing regard it, but behind his Backe in mod
fcornefull Sort derided him, and both in their Words
and Actions greatly abufe him ; Reuerence they would
doe none vnto him, but when they fpake, it was in
fuch malapert Sort, as would grieue an honeft Minde
to heare it.

At lafl it came to pafle, that breaking out into meere
Contempt, they faid they would Hay no longer with
him, and that it was a great Difcredit for them to ferue
a Perfon fo beggerly : whereupon they thought it con-
uenient to feeke for their Benefits elfewhere. When
the diftrefled Man found the Matter fo plaine, being
in great Griefe, he fpake thus vnto them : Now do I
find, to my Sorrow, the fmall Trufl that is in this falfe
World. Why, my Mailers, (quoth he) haue you fo
much forgotten my former Profperity, that you No-
thing regard my prefent Neceflity ? In your Wants I
forfooke you not, in your Sickneffe I left you not,
nor defpifed you in your great Pouerty : it is not vn-
knowne, though you do not confider it, that I tooke
fome of you vp in the High-way i otherfome from your
needy Parents, & brought the Reft from meere Beg-
gery to a Houfe of Bounty j where from paltrie Boyes,
I brought you vp to Mans State, and haue, to my
great Coft, taught you a Trade, whereby you may

live

of Thomas of Reading.

live like Men. And in Requitall of all my Courtefie,
Cofl, and Goodwill, will you now on a fudden forfake
me ? Is this the belt Recompence that you can find
your Hearts to yeeld me ?

This is farre from the Minds of honefl Seruants.
The fierce Lion is kind to thofe that doe him Good :
plucke but one Thorne out of his Foot, and for the
fame he will mew manifold Fauors. The wild Bull will
not ouerthrow his Dam : and the very Dragons are
dutifull to their Nourilhers. Be better aduifed, and
call to Mind, I befeech you, that I haue not pluckt a
Thorne out of your Feet, but drawne your whole Bo-
dies out of Perils, and when you had no Meanes to
helpe your felues, I onely was your Support, and he
that, when all other forfooke you, did comfort you in
all your Extremities.

And what of all this ? quoth one of them ; becaufe
you tooke vs vp poore, doth it therefore follow that
we muft be your Slaves ? We are young Men, and
for our Part, we are no further to regard your Profit
then it may ftand with our Preferment. Why mould
we lofe our Benefit to pleafure you ? If you taught vs
our Trade, and brought vs vp from Boies to Men,
you had our Seruice for it, whereby you made no
fmall Benefit, if you had as well vfed it as we got it.
But if you be poore, you may thanke your felfe, being
a iuft Scourge for your Prodigalitie, and is my Opi-
nion
8

The pleafant Hiftorie

nion plaine, that to flay with you is the next Way to
make vs like you, neither able to help ourfelves nor
our Friends : therefore in briefe, come pay me my
Wages, for I will not flay ; let the Refl do as they
will, for I am refolued.

Well, faid his Mafter, if needs thou wilt be gone,
here is Part of thy Wages in Hand, & the Refl as
foone as God fends it thou fhalt haue it : & with that,
turning to the Refl, he faid, Let me yet in treat you to
flay, and leaue me not altogether deflitute of Helpe :
by your Labours mull I liue, and without you I know
not what to doe. Confider, therefore, my Need, and
regard my great Charge. And if for my Sake you will
doe nothing, take Companion of my poore Children ;
flay my Aiding Foote, and let me not vtterly fall
through your flying from me.

Tufh, (quoth they) what do you talke to vs ? We
can haue better Wages, and ferue a Man of Credit,
where our Farre fhall be farre better, & our Gaines
greater : therefore the World might count us right
Coxcomes, if we fhould forfake our Profit to pleafure
you : therefore adieu ; God fend you more Money,
for you are like to haue no more Men : and thus they
departed.

When they were gone, within a while after they
met one with another, faying, What Cheare ? are you
all come away ? In faith I, what fhould we doe elfe ?

quoth

-

of Thomas of Reading.

quoth they. But hear'ft thou, Sirra, had thou got thy
Wages ? Not yet, faith the Other, but I fhall haue it,
and that is as good ; tis but x. Shillings. Saift thou fo ?
(faid he) now I fee thou art one of God Almighties
Idiots. Why fo ? faid the Other. Becaufe (quoth he)
thou wilt be fed with Shales : but He tell thee one
Thing ; twere better for thee quickly to arreft him,
left fome other doing it before, and there be Nothing
left to pay thy Debt : hold thy Peace, faire Words
make Fooles faine, and it is an old Saying, One Bird
in Hand is worth Two in Bum : if thou doft not arreft
him prefently, I will not giue thee Two-pence for thy
x. Shillings. • How fhall I come by him ? quoth the
Other : giue me but two Pots of Ale, and lie betray
him, faid he. So they being agreed, this fmooth-faced
Iudas comes to his late Mafter, and told him that a
Friend of his at the Doore would fpeake with him.
The vnmiftrufting Man, thinking no Euill, went to
the Doore, where prefently an Officer arrefted him at
his Man's Suite.

The poore Man feeing this, being ftrucken into a
fudden Sorrow, in the Griefe of his Heart, spake to
this Effect : Ah thou lewd Fellow, Art thou the firft
Man that feekes to augment my Miferie ? Haue I thus
long giuen thee Bread, to breed my Ouerthrow? And
nourifht thee in thy Neede, to work my Deftruction ?
Full little did I thinke, when thou fo often diddeft dip

thy

The pleafant Hiftorie

thy falfe Fingers in my Dim, that I gaue Food to my
chiefeft Foe : but what boote Complaints in thefe Ex-
tremes ? Goe, Wife, (quoth he,) unto my Neigh-
bours, and fee if thou canft get any of them to be my
Baile. But in vaine was his Paines fpent. Then he
fent to his Kinsfolkes, and they denied him : to his
Brother, and he would not come at him, fo that
there was no Shift, but to Prifon he muft : but, as he
was going, a Meffenger met him with a Letter from
Matter Cole, wherein, as you heard, hee had promifed
him Two Hundred Pounds j which when the poore
Man read, hee greatly rejoyced, and fhewing the fame
to the Officer, hee was content to take his owne Worde.
Whereupon Tom Doue went prefently to Reading,
where, upon his coming, he found all the Reft of the
Clothiers lamenting Cole's vntimely Death, where the
woefull Widdou paid him the Money, by which Deed
all the Reft of the Clothiers were induced to doe Some-
thing for Doue, And thereupon one gaue him Ten
Pounds, another Twenty, another Thirtie Pounds,
to begin the World anew : and by this Meanes (to-
gether with the Blefling of God) he grew into greater
Credit than euer hee was before. And Riches being
thus come upon him, his former Friends came fawning
vnto him ; and when he had no Neede of them, then
euerie one was readie to proffer him KindnefTe. His
wicked Seruants also that difdained him in his Dif-
trelfe, were after glad to come creeping vnto him, in-
treating

of Thomas of Reading.

treating with Cap and Knee for his Fauour and Friend-
fliip. And albeit hee feemed to forgiue their Tref-
paffes done againfl him, yet hee would often fay, he
would neuer trufl them for a Straw. And thus he
euer after liued in great Wealth and Profperitie, doing
much Good to the Poore, and at his Death left to his
Children great Lands.

How fair e Margaret made her EJiate and high Birth
known to her Majler and Dame ; £«f for the intire
Loue floe bore to Duke Robert, made a Vow neuer to
marry i but became a Nun in the Abbey at Glocejier.
Chap. 15.

AFTER faire Margaret was come againe to Glo-
cefter, neuer did fhe behold the cleare Day,
but with a weeping Eye : and fo great was the Sorrow
which me conceiued for the LofTe of Duke Robert, her
faithfull Louer, that Ihe vtterly defpifeth all the Plea-
fure of this Life, and at laft bewrayed her felfe in this
Sort vnto her Dame.

O, my good Matter and Dame, too long haue I dif-
fembled my Parentage from you, whom the froward
Deftinies doe purfue to deferued Punilhment. The
wofull Daughter am I of the vnhappy Earl of Shrews-
burie, who, euer fince his Banifhment, haue done No-
thing but drawne Mifchance after mee : wherefore let

me

The pleafant Hiftorie

me intreat you (deare Matter and Dame) to haue your
Good-wills to fpend the Remnant of my Life in fome
bleffed Monafterie.

When Gray and his Wife heard this, they wondred
greatly, as well at her Birth as at her ftrange De-
mand. Whereupon her Dame knew not how to call
her, whether Maiden or Madam, but faid, O good
Lord, are you a Ladie, and I know it not ? I am for-
rie that I knew it. not before. But when the Folkes of
the Houfe heard that Margaret was a Lady, there was
no fmall Alteration ; and moreouer, her Dame faid,
that fhe had thought to haue had a Match betweene
her and her Son ; and, by many Perfwafions, did
feeke to withdraw her from being a Nun, faying, in
this Manner : What, Margaret, thou art young and
faire, the World (no Doubt) hath better Fortune for
thee, whereby thou maift leaue an honourable IfTue
behind thee, in whom thou mayft Hue after Death.

These, and many other Reafons, did they alledge
unto her, but all in vaine, fhe making this Reply, Who
knowes not that this World giueth the Pleafure of an
Houre, but the forrow of many Daies ? For it paieth
euer that which it promifeth, which is Nothing elfe
but continuall Trouble and Vexation of the Minde.
Do you think, if I had the Offer and Choice of the
mightieft Princes of Chriftendom, that I could match
my felfe better then to my Lord Jefus ? No, no, hee

is

of Thomas of Reading.

^-

is my Hufband, to whom I yeeld my felfe, both Body
and Soule, giuing to him my Heart, my Loue, and
my moll firme Affections : I haue ouerlong loued this
vile World, therefore I befeech you farther diffwade
me not.

When her Friends by no Meanes could alter her
Opinion, the Matter was made knowne to his Maieflie,
who, againfl the Time that fhe fhould be receiued into
the Monaflerie, came to Gloceiler with mod Part of
his Nobilitie, to honour her Action with his princely
Prefence.

All Things being therfore prepared, the young La-
dy was in mofl princely-wife attired in a Gowne of
pure white Sattin, her Kirtle of the fame, embroider-
ed with Gold about the Skirts, in mofl curious Sort ;
her Head was garnifhed with Gold, Pearles, and pre-
cious Stones, hauing her Haire like Thrids of burnifht
Gold, hanging downe behind in Manner of a prince-
ly Bride ; about her Yuory Necke, Jewels of inefti-
mable Price were hung, and her Handwrefls were
compaffed about with Bracelets, or bright-mining
Diamonds.

The Streets thorow the which me fhould pane
were pleafantly deckt with greene Oaken Boughs;
then came the young Lady, mofl like an heauenly
Angell, out of her Mafler's Houfe, at what Time all
the Bells in Glocefter were folemnly rung ; fhe being

Q led

The pleafant Hiftorie

led betwixt the Kings Maieftie, hauing on his Royal
Robes and Imperiall Crowne, and the Chiefe Bifhop
wearing his Mitre, in a Cope of Cloth of Gold, over
her Head a Canopy of white Silke, fringed about in
princely Manner ; before her went an Hundred Priefts
singing, and after her all the chiefe Ladies of the
Land ; then all the Wiues and Maidens of Glocefter
followed, with an innumerable Sort of People on euery
Side (landing to behold her. In this Sort me pafled on
to the Cathedrall Church, where fhe was brought to
the Nunry Gate.

The Lady Abbeffe receiued her, where the beauti-
full Maiden, kneeling downe, made her Prayer in
Sight of all the People ; then, with her owne Hands,
me vndid her Virgins faire Gowne, and took it off,
and gaue it away to the Poore, after that, her Kirtle,
then her Jewels, Bracelets, and Rings, saying, Fare-
well the Pride and Vanitie of this World. The Or-
naments of her Head were the next fhee gaue away,
and then was me led on one Side, where fhe was drip-
ped, and, in Stead of her Smoke of fofte Silke, had a
Smoke of rough Haire put upon her.

Then came one with a Paire of Sheares, and cut off
her Golden-coloured Locks, and with Duft and Afhes
all beflrewed her Head and Face ; which being done,
fhe was brought againe into the Peoples Sight, bare
foot and bare-leg'd, to whom fhe faid, Now, Farewell

the

of Thomas of Reading.

O"

the World, Farewell the Pleafures of this Life, Fare-
well my Lord the King, and to the Dukes fweet Love
farewell ; now fhall my Eyes weepe for my former
Tranfgreffions, and no more (hall my Tongue talke of
Vanity ; Farewell my good Matter and Dame, and
Farewell all good People.

With which Words fhe was taken away, and neuer
after feene abroad. When Duke Robert heard there-
of, he defired that at his Death his Body might be
buried in Glocefter ; in that Towne, quoth he, where
firft my cleare Eyes beheld the heauenly Beauty of
my Loue, and where, for my Sake, fhee forfooke the
World ; which was performed accordingly.

The King alfo, at his Death, requefted to be buried
at Reading, for the great Loue he bare to that Place,
among those Clothiers, who, liuing, were his Hearts
Comfort. Gray, dying wondrous wealthy, gaue Land
to the Monatterie whereinto Margaret was taken.
William Fitzallen alfo dyed a molt rich Man, hauing
builded many Houfes for the Poore j whose Sonne,
Henry, was the firft Mayor that was euer in London.

Sutton of Salifbury did also, at his Death, much Good,
and gaue an Hundred li. to be yeerly lent to poore
Weauers of the Towne, to the Worlds End. Simon
of South-hampton gave a moft bounteous Gift towards
the Building of a Monaftery at Winchefter. Hodgkins
of Hallifax did also great Good j and fo did Cutbert

of

The pleafant Hiftorie, &c.

of Kendall, who had married xxiii. Couples out of his
owne Houfe, giuing each of them x.li. to beginne the
World withall. Martin Briam of Manchefler gaue
toward the Building of a Free-School in Manchefler,
a great maffe of Money. And thus (gentle Reader)
haue I finifhed my Storie of thefe worthy Men, defi-
ring thee to take my Paines in good Part, which will
iftgage me to greater Matters, perceiuing this courte-
oufly accepted.

FINIS.

Edinburgh : Printed by James Ballantyne and Co.

k

**

TOITVDJQ'1

^illDNV-SQl*

•v/Ad3AINIIJU>

^»ojiiv>j^

^OJIIYHO^

^OKALIFC%

AWEUNIVERS/a

Or

^lOS-ANGELfj^

%

^OF-CAllFORfc

s iffidJ iV£)i

UNIVERSITY OF CALIFORNIA LIBRARY

Los Angeles

This book is DUE on the last date stamped below.

MAR 2 9 1989

tKi/A^

0 cO

<f

k

^OKALIFOftfe

^oAuvaaiH^

;lOSANGEtfj>

' - n =

-<

5?

%MAINrf

^LOSANGELfr>

%.

,5

«j\t-llBRARY&A
£T1 ir^ £

to

WIT

^0KALIF0%

- r~j*~j — 2 (si

i

y0A«vaaiH^

ANGElfj>

CO

ri

■JNd-jV^V

-<

[%

1

AINH3VW

CO
3d

^UIBRARY-0^

I IJfo I

^ ^3AINn-3UV

'-OTAIN

rn

3 1158 01029 0137

UC SOUTHERN REGIONAL LIBRARY FACILITY

A A 000 345 660 5

mi ii

ffvm

;■.■■ ;'•;;!■ un ..•■,•'•-■': /'