Mystery House.
That strange publishing firm owned by Dan and Barbara Glenn,
where each new novel is acted out by the Mystery House staff
before it is accepted for publication.
Mystery House.
Hi Dan. Hi Barbie.
Where are you? Greetings everybody.
You're all up in your parts, are you?
Yep. Say, this is a mighty squirrely story in this family, isn't it?
Of course. That's why we think this story will make a hit.
Readers don't enjoy reading about ordinary folks.
They like the unusual.
That's right, Barbie. The more unusual, the better.
I disagree on that, Mr. Glenn.
It's the straightforward, direct approach that wins friends.
For example, listen.
Okay, Tom. Set the scene.
Murder in Paradise.
The first act opens in the palatial home of the late Happy Harris,
tremendously successful publisher of inspirational books.
His daughter has just admitted a newspaper reporter to the living room.
Let's see. You'd be Hope Harris, wouldn't you?
Yeah. Won't you have a seat?
Thanks. Where's everybody else? The rest of the Happiness Boys?
The Happiness Boys?
Sure. Didn't you know that's what they call your family?
Well, I never thought about it, I'm sure, but I don't like it.
I hope you'll remember that when we granted you this interview for your paper,
you agreed there'd be nothing sarcastic or cruel about...about father.
Don't worry, kid. You know, old Happy Harris was a fabulous character,
any way you look at it.
Tell me, honest now, was all that happiness and light on the level?
Didn't the old boy ever get sore on Nash's teeth or throw things?
My dear sir, happiness is a state of mind.
There's never any reason for making yourself unhappy by losing your temper.
It's a matter of self-control, and anger is a sign of weakness.
It's one of the worst vices of mankind,
and the Harris Publishing Company has always driven to...
Hey, hey, wait a minute. Don't give me the sales talk from the book catalog.
But, honest, didn't the fact that Happy Harris made himself a million bucks from inspirational books...
Oh, I hate that word, inspirational.
Didn't that have maybe a teeny weeny bit to do with this happiness act?
Father was the most sincere man who ever lived.
His whole life was a shining beacon, an inspiration to the world to follow the happy life,
to think happy thoughts...
Okay, okay, I'm sold. I believe you.
Boy, he certainly sold his idea to this family, if you're any example.
Most guys would be sore as all get out of some of the cracks I made about your man.
Anger is a sign of...
I know. A sign of weakness.
It hurts the person who exhibits it, and it hurts the person who has to listen to it.
If you refuse to listen, then...
Oh, mother, this is Mr....
Joe Corning from the Herald, Mrs. Harris.
Oh, I suppose you're here to get a story about the Happy Harris family carrying on the Harris Publishing Company,
continuing to bring inspiration to the world.
Something like that.
The happy children and the happy mother all joining together to bring sunshine.
Mother, please, see, Mr. Corning...
I never fell for the happiness gruff Mr. Corning.
It's a mighty handsome living, but if I had known I was marrying a smile,
I don't think I'd have done it.
Mother...
I know, Hope.
Your father's scarcely cold in his grave.
Well, I've lived in an atmosphere of perpetual joy for so long,
it's a relief to be able to grouse about something,
not to have to smirk at everybody every time I go out in public.
You can't imagine what a wonderful thing that is.
Mother, this man's from the newspaper.
I know.
Mr. Corning, you can tell your readers that henceforth,
I am the scholar of the Harris Publishing Company.
High chief scholar.
I'm going to stick out my tongue at people.
I'm going to get into nasty argument.
Well, if it isn't my sunshine.
Oh, Jeff, dear, I'm so glad you got here.
See if you can do something with Mother.
This is Joe Corning from the Herald, a reporter.
Yeah, you know, I write.
How do you do?
Don't get upset, Hope, darling.
Mother's just suffering a reaction to Dad's untimely death.
I've got a lot to know about it, Jeff.
Trying to irritate me, Mother? You can't do it.
Listen, my boy, I handled you when you were a squalling brat,
and I liked you better then than I do now,
with that synthetic smile spread all over your mouth.
You see, Jeff, she's a...
If you kids had an ounce of gumption, you'd stand up for your rights.
No, Mother.
Don't you now, Mother Meade.
You don't get up on your hind legs and howl,
Junior's going to take the pennies right out of your piggy bank.
I take it Junior's your eldest son?
Yes, and Happy left him more than a trick grin.
Junior had some of Happy's larceny.
You see, Junior was with us when Happy and I were pitching books at county fairs
before we'd hijacked the natives out of enough money to go into the publishing business.
Mother'd like to start a quarrel, Mr. Corning.
You see, Junior's the eldest of the family,
and naturally he's entitled to head up the company.
We're all perfectly happy about it.
Count me out if you're taking that statement for publication, Mr. Corning.
You may quote the elder Mr. Terrace as saying, quote,
We put no pennies on Happy's eyes because we were afraid Junior'd get them.
Mother!
Oh, I wonder who that could be.
Well, I'll see. But I won't smile at him.
What's gotten into Mother anyway, Hol?
I don't know. Oh, it's Mr. Keller.
Yes, he hasn't smiled in 50 years and the best man with a doll in the city, Mr. Corning.
Corning?
Howdy-do.
Hi. You're a treasure of the Harris Publishing Company, aren't you?
What's left of it?
Now, Keller, you know business is wonderful.
The country's gone absolutely mad on inspiration literature.
Yes, that's just it. It's a bad sign.
They buy the books because they want to get happy, and they're already getting happy.
And the next thing you know, we'll be in bad shape.
What we need right now is a good line of tearjerkers.
Junior here with the papers yet?
What papers?
You'll find out what papers. Freezing us all out, he is.
What? What do you mean?
Slick little devil slipped out and bought up stock.
Scared the folks in the plant into selling to him.
Got proxies from some of the others to conserve the estate.
So he said...
What? What's this all about anyway?
Gave me a showdown with that nasty smile on his face.
Said he was taking over following this meeting and I wouldn't be needed anymore.
Said he'd be able to handle the money himself.
Did he say anything about me, Keller?
He said the company couldn't afford to pay salaries to the family.
And he wasn't going to have it said he'd let the family ruin the business.
Talked about his responsibility and maintaining the family tradition and name and...
Yeah, sickening, that's what it was.
Now don't get excited, Mr. Keller.
If Junior said that, he had a reason for it.
He must be trying to arrange things so that we'll all have more money.
Isn't that right, Jeff?
I... I suppose so.
Well, sure, we trust Junior implicitly.
A fine pair of nitwits you raised there, Nellie.
I don't know what that louse Junior is the best of the lot at that.
Mr. Keller, the Harris family has a national reputation for living the good life,
for following the golden rule.
Now I don't care what you say about me, but you've no right to...
Hey, wait, that sounded like a shot.
A revolver shot.
From Junior's study.
I didn't even know he was home. Come on.
Oh, it must be an accident of some kind.
I don't think Junior's even there.
The rest of you stay back. No use taking any chances.
Oh, Harry.
Well, if somebody's been shot, he won't get away.
Now fast, anyway.
Stay back, all of you.
Junior?
Yeah, I'm afraid he's dead.
Shot right through the temple.
Then must be suicide.
Poor kid.
Happy just gave Jeff and Hope the front.
The glad act.
He gave Junior the works.
Poor unhappy kid.
Stop it. You've no right to talk that way.
Junior was a fine upright man.
For his own mother to even think such thoughts about him.
When he's given his own life to save the company for us.
I'm afraid that's a bad guess, Hope.
Why? What do you mean?
You think he killed himself because...
Wrong. He didn't kill himself.
That shot we heard didn't kill him.
Couldn't possibly have killed him.
But it had to.
It was only one shot. We all heard it.
Look, Jeff. This will probably make you very unhappy.
But the body's cold. Feel it yourself.
I...I couldn't.
Blood's coagulated around the wound.
Oh, stop it. You've no right to say such gruesome things.
No? Listen.
I was shot by someone after the fingers had stiffened.
Nobody ever held a gun like that in this world.
Junior Harris was murdered.
But that's not possible.
Maybe it isn't possible, but it's happened.
And you happiness kids are in for the jolly of life.
Why? What do you mean?
I mean that these papers here on this desk are what Keller was talking about.
All legal.
You three were frozen out of the firm as neatly as it's ever been done.
Which gives you pretty good motives for bumping him off.
Do you think that we'd actually kill our own brother?
Whoever did it didn't do it for laughs.
And if you're hunting for a motive, you folks had a pretty good one.
Oh, Lordy, it's a relief to hear a young man talk some sense for a change.
The police are going to give you folks the worst.
Yes, and me too.
I suppose they'll hound and badger me so that life's miserable.
I can just see him pestering me.
You. You, Mr. Keller. You could have killed him.
Because he said he was going to take over your job.
To save your job and for revenge.
Look, Hope. From what that reporter fella says,
Junior was already dead when I got here.
That's just it. When you got here.
None of us knew Junior was here. Why?
Because you killed him and lugged him in through the window.
Then you tiptoed out, closed the window, and came around to the front door.
Junior's study door was closed so naturally we didn't see or hear anything.
After I closed that window you're speaking of,
how do you figure I got it locked from the inside?
Pretty good trick.
I... Why, it is locked, isn't it?
Yes. And that shot after I was here with you folks.
You know I'm no ventriloquist.
Hope. Yes, Jeff.
You were in the living room alone when the reporter came, weren't you?
Why, yes.
Naturally I couldn't know anything about Junior's being here because I was upstairs.
Mother wasn't here either.
But it's quite obvious that he did come in.
Probably before the reporter.
And if he decided to tell you what he'd planned...
If he decided... Jeff.
Are you trying to say that I murdered him?
I'm saying it's a possibility.
Why, you... Listen, you... you namby-pamby.
If you think you're going to pin this murder on to me, you've got another guest coming.
I'm simply saying what could have happened.
Well, you just go right ahead. Keep talking, Jeff.
Try to get me into all the trouble you can,
and when you get through I'll show you what trouble really is.
You want to be nasty, do you?
Well, okay, brother dear, I'll be nasty too.
I'll tell them about that cute little scene I heard between you and Junior last night.
Oh, so you're an eavesdropper, are you?
You bet I'm an eavesdropper.
And why wouldn't I be with a couple of two-faced hypocrites for brothers...
brothers who'd rob me blind if they got the opportunity?
Well, I don't know that you're such an angel yourself, Hope.
I suppose you weren't trying to pull a fast one with Junior.
You lie!
I suppose you didn't tell him you'd cooperate with him in every possible way,
and that between the two of you...
I said I'd cooperate because I had to, or lose everything I had.
He was a rotten, no-good, tricky cheat.
And the only way anybody could protect himself was to work with him.
Sure, against Mother and me. Why, you...
At least I didn't threaten to kill him.
I guess that'll hold you for a while.
You mean... you heard your brother threaten to kill Junior?
Certainly did.
And they weren't smiling, either one of them.
Just a minute, Mr. Corning. Are you leaving?
Yep. Sorry, but this is too good a story to pass up.
Talk about your sweet angles, murder in paradise, happiness kids, tear each other's hair.
I'll be back with the police.
Just a minute, Corning.
Take your hand off that doorknob.
Mother, you... where did you get that gun?
Never mind where I got it.
You might as well make up your mind to stick around a while, Corning.
But my story, I...
We've got close to a million dollars in the Harris Publishing Company, Corning.
And you're not blowing the company sky high with that kind of a story.
Sit!
Sorry, Mrs. Harris.
Mother!
Sit, Mr. Corning.
Next time, I might not try to miss.
When you fool around with a million dollars,
you don't play for laughs.
Not many clues on the identity of Junior Harris' murderer, are there?
Well, the tangle will all be unsnarled in the second act of tonight's story.
And now, Act Two of Murder in Paradise.
The scene is Junior Harris' study.
The warm-up, which reads, You can be happy, is a skew.
Joe Corning, the reporter, seems to have resigned himself to staying around a while.
It's pretty obvious that two guns played a part in Junior's murder, isn't it?
One to kill him, and one to fire that shot we heard from the living room.
I...
Why, yes, I guess that's right.
And we found two guns, haven't we?
What are you driving at?
There's nothing so mysterious about it, is there?
I said we'd found two guns.
The one in Junior's hand, and the one Mother fired in your general direction when you tried to leave.
Listen, you lousy little brat, if you're trying to mix your mother...
Oh, let him alone, Keller.
Go on, Jeff, darling.
What was it you were going to say?
You had another gun, and there were two guns used.
That's right.
Then your gun could have been the one that fired the shot we heard from the living room.
You could have had it hidden in here, rigged up some way to go off later.
Look, I'm about ready to take a poke at you.
I've seen some fourth-rate heels in my time, but one who tried to stick his mother in a murder case.
Oh, don't get so indignant, Keller.
This makes me very happy.
Happy?
I've seen him smile so much that it's a real pleasure to see him getting nasty.
And I can't begin to tell you how pleased you made me feel, Hope, when you screamed and snarled at Jeff.
Mother, please, you shouldn't talk that way.
Jeff deliberately accused you of...
I know. Murder.
But it doesn't mean anything, dear.
Well, of course not, but that gun...
Worrying you too, is it?
Well, remember, I fired a shot to persuade Corning to stay.
Yes.
Here, Corning, I'll open it.
See if more than one shot's been fired.
No. Only one shell missing.
Been fired just once.
But I'm interested in hearing more about your little fight with your brother last night, Jeff.
The one where you said you would kill him.
Well, I... I guess I did say that all right.
I suppose we might as well get one thing cleared up.
We all knew what Junior was pulling on us.
Dad had left Junior a little more stock in the company than the rest of us,
because he wanted Junior to head the firm.
Junior used his position to work a squeeze play on the rest of us.
He called a family meeting for this afternoon.
And you all admit you knew what he was doing?
Yeah.
We worked things to get you in here for this interview this afternoon as a last resort.
We had Mother call you.
I don't get it.
Well, we thought if we all gave out stories to the press about the family
and how we trusted Junior and knew anything he was doing was for our best interests,
well, we thought we might shame him into changing his mind.
Dad was always scared to death of bad publicity.
He said it could ruin our kind of a firm.
Good, Joe.
That's why he brought us up the way he did.
We were supposed to be living testimonials to the power of his happiness crusade.
So you tossed your little problem to me, huh?
That's right.
Well, it looks like one of you had a lot more effective way of handling it.
Couldn't it have been some outsider?
Don't be naive, Hope.
Of course it was one of us.
You're not going to be able to keep the story out of papers forever, Mrs. Harris.
How about giving me a break and letting me get back to the office?
You'll get the story before anybody else does.
And you'll get it the way we want it.
Let's see.
The suicide story would stand up if it weren't for that pesky shock we heard.
Or did we hear it?
I heard it, Mrs. Harris.
Did you hear it $10,000 worth?
Ha ha ha.
I don't buy off, Mrs. Harris. Sorry.
Somebody could have killed him with robbery as a motive,
coming in through the window and going out the same way.
It wasn't for that lock.
I suppose it would hurt anything to just give it a little jiggle, maybe.
If you want to tackle with the evidence, Keller, you'll be able to read all about it in the Herald.
Look, we're not going to get anywhere until we find out about that second shot.
Even if you won't let me leave, you've got to let me call the police.
You really have to, Mother.
I do.
Oh, well, there's no way out of it.
Go ahead.
Just a minute.
Mrs. Harris showed us a gun.
She fired one.
I wonder if anyone else in this room has a gun, a revolver that's being hidden.
That's preposterous. Why should anybody?
I'm going to search the rest of you before I call the police.
How about you, Jeff?
I...
No.
See here, you're no policeman. You can't...
I think maybe I could. Now hold still.
See here, you've no right to...
Oh, try to slug me, will you?
Ouch, my wrist.
Search him, cover quick.
Okay.
That'll do any good.
Well, I'll be doggone.
A revolver, Jeff.
Hmm.
Bullet missing from it, too.
See here, Corny, you have no authority.
Forget the authority, Jeff.
I guess now maybe I can call the police.
No, listen, I had the gun with me.
We heard the shots from in here. I couldn't possibly have...
Hello? Captain Heron, please.
Captain Heron?
Ah, this is Joe Corny of the Herald.
Yeah.
Say, there's a guy out here at the Happy Harris place
has a nice little puzzle for you to solve.
Yeah.
How he managed to commit a murder.
They've got him covered so he can't get away, but...
Hurry.
It's perfectly terrible to think of Jeff in jail.
They had no right to take him.
That policeman didn't have any idea how Jeff could have fired the gun.
He didn't.
What?
But you told the police...
I know, I know.
But I think your brother was telling the truth about that revolver.
Well, then why did he...
Didn't you ever notice?
A murderer lays low until somebody else is arrested.
Then he gets brave.
And if he doesn't do anything, we'll never catch him.
This way there's a chance.
But who do you think...
I'm not saying.
Mother and Mr. Keller.
No, they wouldn't do such an awful thing, either of them.
Awful thing?
Look, he was a great A-heel and he deserved exactly what he got.
The charming Junior Harris, the papers always said.
But as charming as a rattlesnake.
Then you knew him.
No, and I got along very nicely without knowing him.
Mother, Mr. Keller, where have you been?
I've been worried about you.
I'm quite able to take care of myself, Hope.
We've been engaging legal counsel for Jeff.
And they're quite encouraging.
Expect to have your mouth in a couple of hours.
Oh, but that's wonderful.
They say the police haven't a prayer of holding him.
Something will probably go wrong, though.
Red tape or some fool thing will keep us from getting him out right away.
Well, I wish you luck.
And it's high time I was getting back to the office or I'll get scooped on my own story.
Oh, just a minute, Mr. Corning.
Eh?
I've admired your stories in the Herald so much.
So many of them are signed.
Oh, I get all byline knowledge, sure.
Well, that's why I asked for you when I called this morning.
That and one other thing.
Yes.
I was snooping through some of Junior's desk drawers late yesterday afternoon,
and I ran across some letters from a Julia Corning.
The name isn't common.
Is she your sister by any chance?
Why, I, uh...
It'd be quite easy to check, Mr. Corning.
Yes. Yes, she's my sister.
It's relatively threatening.
That's the second reason I asked for you.
You understand, don't you?
Then you think... but...
I never even met the guy and had no desire to.
Oh, I knew what Sis thought of him, sure, but...
I wanted to see what you'd do, Mr. Corning,
before you'd try to blame for the murder.
I wanted to give you enough rope to hang yourself.
That's why I didn't say anything about Sis before.
Look, I didn't kill him.
I had nothing to do with it.
I never laid eyes on him until I opened the door of that study.
I think the police ought to know about this.
I don't see why you didn't tell them sooner, Nellie.
This is soon enough.
Will you go to the police station quietly, Mr. Corning?
Remember, I'm a pretty good shop.
When I missed you before, I did it deliberately.
I'll be hanged if I let you drag my sister into this mess.
She's had enough unpleasantness out of this family without you...
An over-speech, Mr. Corning, but not too convincing.
Come along.
Oh, no.
If you think you're going to involve her in this mess, you're wrong.
Get wrong. You're not...
Stop it!
Oh, well...
You see? I don't always miss Corning.
My... my arm.
Get me to a doctor, quick.
They have a doctor at the police station, I imagine.
Come on, Keller. You better take him in.
But you can't go like that, Mother. You'll need your coat.
Never mind my coat. Come on, Keller.
But it's chilly out.
We've got to hurry before he loses too much blood.
Come on.
It won't take a second.
Your coat's right over here in the clothes cart.
Hope, I said no! I don't want my coat!
You're going to take it anyway. Here...
There's a hole in the pocket and a burn streak down...
Grab her, Keller, quick!
You! You! You! You!
I'm surprised at you, Nellie.
Stop aiming that thing at me.
Get it, Hope!
I... I have...
But I don't understand.
Look in the coat pocket.
Don't let her get her hands on it.
Hmm...
A revolver with pieces of broken matchsticks
wedged in behind the trigger.
And there's a bottle with some water in it and no cork.
And the inside of the pocket is all wet.
Okay.
And I put the matchsticks in behind the trigger.
Not firm enough to make it go off.
Not quite.
The bottle was full of water when I stuck it in the pocket on its side.
I knew the water'd eventually expand the matchsticks.
When they swelled up enough, the gun had to go off.
Pretty cute.
You knew nobody'd expect a shot to be fired from a clothes closet
and that it'd sound the same as if it came from the study.
It did. You all fell for it.
But it was supposed to be suicide.
Didn't want to get anybody into trouble.
You were here in case anything went wrong.
To be the fall guy.
And you were my undoing right from the start.
But... when did you kill him?
Early this morning.
I told you and Jeff he'd left to see the lawyers.
Oh, your own son. Your own flesh and blood.
No, Hope.
I always told Happy he was wrong about that.
None of you kids was Nellie's, really.
And Happy, he thought it'd make better publicity
not to mention his first wife had walked out on him and got a divorce.
He wanted to make folks think he'd always had a happy family.
Happy? I've been kept miserable for years by one smirking hypocrite.
I wasn't going to let another one cheat me out of the money I'd earned.
All right, Keller. Take me in.
The boy reporter better come along, too.