You're about to be entertained by some of the biggest names in show business.
For the next hour and 30 minutes, this program will present in person such bright stars as
Vivian Blaine, Jose Ferrer, Sam Levine, Ken Murray, Margot O'Brien, Gloria Swanson, Brian
Warren, Meredith Wilson, and my name darlings is Tallulah Bankshirt.
The National Broadcasting Company presents The Big Show.
The Big Show, 90 minutes with the most scintillating personalities in the entertainment world.
Brought to you this Sunday and every Sunday at the same time as the Sunday feature of
NBC's All Star Festival.
And here is your hostess, the glamorous, unpredictable Tallulah Bankhead.
Well darlings, how did Santa Claus treat you?
I must tell you about one beautiful present I received, a new mink coat.
My best friend sent it to me.
I bought it myself.
I saw it in the window, I liked it, I decided I simply must have it.
I wrote out a check for $10,000 and took the coat with me.
When I got home, I decided I'd been a little too extravagant, so I sent it back.
And what an odd coincidence, the coat got back to the store just as my check came back from
the bank.
But Christmas is behind us now and we have a show to do.
Last week on our Christmas program, one of our guest stars was Margaret O'Brien of the
movie.
She did so well, too well to suit me, that she's with us again this week, a sort of Christmas
hangover for me.
I wish I could take an anisone and make her disappear.
But she's been held over by popular demand, not mine, you understand.
The child is too talented, much too talented.
After all, a job is a job.
I'm not trying to take your job, Miss Bankhead.
Well darling, little Margaret O'Brien.
I want to thank you, Miss Bankhead, for your lovely Christmas present.
Oh, did you like it, darling?
Oh yes, it was sweet of you to send me a one-way railroad ticket to California.
I thought I wrapped it nicely.
Oh, it was super.
It was what, dear?
It was super.
Super, of course.
But I'm not going back to California, Miss Bankhead.
You're not?
I'm going to stick right close to you.
You are not.
Because I've decided I want to be a great actress just like you are.
Oh darling, isn't he sweet?
There's so much I can learn from you, Miss Bankhead.
Oh Margaret, you may call me Tallulah.
Oh may I?
Thank you.
So you want to be an actress, little Margaret.
Yes, I do, Big Tallulah.
You see, I think a person should have an ambition, a goal in life.
For 13 years now, I've been drifting aimlessly.
Of course, for the last seven years, I made a niche for myself in the movies.
Yes, a seven-year niche.
And what did you do the first six years of your life?
With just a bum, I suppose.
Yes, those were bad years.
I was disorganized, confused, tortured.
I couldn't decide whether I should be in the theater or the movies.
I became so nervous I was eating two packs of chocolate cigarettes a day.
Yes, I see you still have the chocolate stains on your index finger.
And I'll bet you used to hit that pablum bottle pretty hard too.
But now I know that theater is my real life, and you're the one I want to pattern myself
after.
Oh, isn't he sweet?
To be an actress like you, acclaimed by the critics, applauded by the public, in magnetic
dynamic electric personality, so lit up.
What's your language, child?
I mean, the way you walk out on the stage without any assistance.
That's acting, Mr. Lula.
That black coffee, child.
That's my ambition, to be a big star like you are.
And then after I've had my success, and if I had to retire and wind up on radio like
you did, well, those are the chances a person has to take.
Oh, I'm afraid so.
But darling, how would you like a shot in the head?
Besides Margaret, actresses never retire.
They are always between plays.
Between plays?
Yes, remember that.
And besides, Margaret, I must warn you that theater is an exacting task, master.
To become a fine actress, it will take you years.
Oh, I don't care.
I want to become a fine actress like you.
Theater takes me years and years and years and years and years.
Now just a minute, just a minute.
I wonder where this child is getting her material.
Margaret, here's lesson number two.
An actress is very sensitive about her age.
But then I wouldn't expect you to understand that, at the tender age of 13.
12 and a half.
I want to be just as sensitive as you are.
Oh, Margaret, you're just a child.
Now why are we standing here talking about the theater, such grown up talk for a little
girl.
Let's talk about the holiday season.
Now let me tell you all about New Year's Eve.
No, don't tell me all about New Year's Eve.
Why don't you just tell me all about Eve?
So that's where she's been getting her material.
Well, I'll put a stop to this.
Meredith, Meredith Wilson.
Yes, Miss Frankhead.
I want to thank you, Margaret, for that Christmas present.
You're welcome.
Of course, I have no plans to go to California right away.
What?
Margaret sent me a one-way ticket to California and it was very nicely wrapped too.
By the way, Miss Frankhead, thank you for your present.
It was just what I needed.
A box of fragile.
Meredith, that was a five-piece set of cut cloths.
There was more pieces than that when I got it.
And well, I want to thank you, Meredith, for that darling scarf you sent me and that delightfully
warm Christmas card you encloaled.
60% rayon, 40% wool.
How warm can you get?
Well now, darling, how about some music, Meredith?
Well sir, Miss Bankhead.
This is the big week in football, the bowl games, you know.
So I wrote a song for my home state university, Iowa.
Oh, is Iowa one of the bowl games?
Well, not exactly.
They might have had a chance though.
See, Iowa was just nosed out in a game with Ohio State, 83 to 21.
That's quite a nose.
Well, Iowa just couldn't get going in that game.
Every time we started setting up a play, somebody fumbled the ball and we couldn't get to our
next play.
Always got caught between plays.
I'm between plays too, Meredith.
What?
Never mind, Meredith.
Let's hear the Iowa fight song you wrote for Iowa, but which is dedicated to all the teams
who didn't get into any of the bowl games tomorrow, but who are going to, by golly, make
it next year our bucket.
What's the word?
Fight, fight, fight.
The word is fight, fight, fight for Iowa.
The word is fight, fight, fight for Iowa.
The word is fight, fight, fight for Iowa.
Until the game is won.
The word is fight, fight, fight for Iowa.
Let every loyal Iowan sing.
The word is fight, fight, fight for Iowa.
The word is fight, fight, fight for Iowa.
Until the game is won.
Meredith, that was really swell.
You've got quite a band there.
Ken Murray.
Hello, Tallulah.
Tallulah, I was just listening to that Iowa fight song that Wilson wrote.
Kind of brings back old memories.
Oh, will it, darling?
You went to college in Iowa too.
Oh, no, no.
As a matter of fact, I didn't go to college at all.
I don't believe a man has to go to college to get an education and acquire a polish.
I'm proud to say that I learned all I know in the school of HN.
School of HN?
Hard knocks.
Well, it wouldn't have hurt you to have had a short spell in college, dear.
Oh, no, not me, Tallulah.
You see, I started in show business when I was a kid.
Never had a chance to go to school, but I used to read books all the time.
Right now, I've settled down here in New York and I've got Dr. Elliott's five-foot bookshelf
in my home.
But do you read the books in the five-foot bookshelf?
Oh, sure.
I read about three inches every night.
My, you read quick.
Yeah, I read that too.
We all read in my family.
I read, my dog reads, even my wife and even my dog reads.
Your dog reads?
Yes, yes.
For Christmas, I got him a copy of Bulldog Drummers.
Of course, he's just starting to read books now.
When he was a puppy, we broke him in our newspapers.
But Tallulah, I came over here to your program for a very special reason.
I'm not here to be entertaining.
What makes you think you have been, darling?
I do a television program.
How would you like to be a guest on my TV show?
I would rather die.
What makes you think you won't, darling?
Now look here, crude cut.
I'm quite satisfied to be doing the show I'm doing here.
But Tallulah, radio is old hat.
But can television is old movies?
Not on my show.
I'd certainly like to have you on my television show with me, though.
Oh, stop talking about it, darling.
Whenever anyone mentions television to me, I see red.
I'll pay you $5,000.
All of a sudden, I see green.
Tell me more about it, darling.
Well, there are a few things you'll have to change.
For instance, if you wanted to wear a black dress like you're wearing now, you'd have
to wear a red dress because you see red photographs black, you see?
Oh, I have a red dress.
But what about my hair, darling?
You'd wear that, too.
Oh, I'm sorry.
You mean the color of your hair.
I'm so sorry.
Well, we had a girl on the show with hair just those same colors.
But to make it photograph better, we had to give her a blue rinse.
Boy, was she soft.
Blue on top, huh?
What about makeup?
I suppose makeup is a big factor.
Oh, yes.
It acts a big difference.
Because otherwise, you see, you don't photograph with the right coloring, you see?
And then, of course, I'll have to give you some jokes to tell.
I suppose the jokes will photograph blue.
Oh, Ken, I'm sorry I forgot.
I want to introduce you to my protege, my new protege.
She decided she wants to become a great actress in the theater, and she's trying to pattern
herself up to me.
Come here, Margaret, sweetie.
Margaret O'Brien, this is Mr. Murray.
Hello, Arthur.
Shall we dance?
She sure is patterning herself after you, Tallulah.
So you want to act in the theater, Margaret.
How old are you?
Twelve.
That's my girl who said that.
Ken, why don't you put Margaret on your show?
Well, I'd like to, but don't you think that she's a little Y-U-N-G?
I'd rather have Y-O-U on my T-E-L-O.
I mean my T-O-L-I.
How do you spell television?
Darling, when I go on television, it'll be spelled T-A-L-L-U-V-I-S-I-O-N.
Oh, Tallulah vision, huh?
I've made up my mind to be in the theater like Tallulah.
Oh, what are you doing now, Margaret?
I'm between plays.
Oh, you've already been in some plays?
No, she's between her first play.
Well, have you seen any of the plays since you've been in town, Margaret?
Oh, yes, I went to sing King Lear by Shakespeare.
That's a lot of laughs.
And I saw The Cocktail Party by T.S.
Eliot.
Good man, T.S.
I've got his five foot bookshelf, you know.
And I saw Enemy of the People.
Starring Milton Berle, I suppose.
Look, look, Margaret, didn't you go to see any of the lighter things, the musical comedies,
maybe?
Oh, no, I wouldn't go to musical comedies.
They're so cheap and the prices are so high.
And besides, I couldn't get any tickets.
You're right, Margaret.
I wanted to see one of the musicals this week.
I know the star of the show very well.
She happened to be a personal enemy of mine.
So I went to the producer and I asked him for a pair of tickets.
And do you know that I couldn't get them for love or money?
Tallulah, I've got a ticket broker who gets all the tickets to the theaters for me.
He got me a couple of guys and dolls.
Guys and dolls, I think that is.
Of course, I had to send him a nice Christmas present.
No, well, speaking of guys and dolls, we happen to have two of the stars of that show with
us today, Vivian Blaine and Sam Levine.
And after Vivian sings her song, Margaret, you ask her for a couple of tickets.
I'm sure she has them.
Meredith, darling, darling Meredith, are you ready for Vivian Blaine's song?
Oh, sure.
All set.
Hi, Meredith.
Hello, Ken Murray.
Well, as I always say, long time no see.
Yes, you do always say that.
And that's why no long time, no see.
Meredith, I want to thank you for your Christmas present.
Oh, you're welcome, Ken.
I wrapped it up pretty nicely, didn't think.
Yes, I'm very sorry.
I can't use it.
I don't sleep well on trains.
You don't mind, I'm sure.
I gave it to somebody for a Christmas present.
That one-way ticket is making a round trip.
Meredith, what is Vivian Blaine going to sing, huh?
Well, Vivian has a wonderful arrangement of what is this thing called love.
Oh, that's wonderful.
I love it.
Ladies and gentlemen, Vivian Blaine with Meredith Wilson's orchestra and chorus in What is This
Thing Called Love.
What is this thing called love, this funny thing called love?
Just who can solve this mystery?
It came and made a fool of me.
I saw you there one wonderful day.
You took my heart and you threw it away.
That's why I ask the Lord in heaven above, what is this thing called love?
It came and made a fool of me.
You took my heart and you threw it away.
That's why I ask the Lord in heaven above, what is this thing, what is this thing, this
crazy thing called love?
Congratulations, Vivian, darling.
Congratulations not only for your song, but for the enormous success you've made in Guys
and Dolls.
Thank you very much.
You're very kind, Tallulah.
Yes, I know.
Look, Vivian, little Margaret here is interested in the story of your musical comedy.
Why don't you tell her what it's all about?
Oh, I'm sorry, but I can't do that.
We're not allowed to give away the plot.
Oh, you can't even give it away.
You're so wrong, Tallulah.
We're selling out every performance.
I got in on a couple of passes.
Yes, that's what I heard.
The manager made one and the box office man made one.
You're just jealous because you can't get any tickets and you're in the show.
It just so happens, Tallulah, darling, that I have two very good seats with me.
Yes, you have, darling.
And it might interest you to know that when I saw your show, I was sitting in the very
front row.
I'm sure you must have seen me.
Oh, no.
I never look way up there.
Now, just a moment, why is it that everyone who comes on the show starts thinking of me?
I try to be as pleasant as I can.
Oh, excuse me, Tallulah.
What is it, Margaret?
Let me, please.
Hello, Vivian.
Darling.
Why, Margaret O'Brien, hello.
Golly, I haven't seen you in years.
Remember when I met you out in Hollywood when I was making pictures?
You remember.
You must have seen me in states fair.
Oh, yes, darling.
You won a blue-collar ticket to the United States.
Oh, yes, darling.
You won a blue-collar ticket to the United States.
Oh, yes, darling.
You won a blue-collar ticket to the United States.
Oh, yes, darling.
You won a blue-collar ticket to the United States.
Oh, yes, darling.
You won a blue ribbon for that, didn't you?
That's my girl who said that.
Well, that's a new twist, hiring a little girl to insult your guest.
Oh, no, Vivian, Margaret didn't really mean it.
She's just trying to help me out.
Very, very interested in seeing your play.
Now, you said you had a couple of tickets.
Why, yes, indeed I have.
I'll be glad to give them to her.
Oh, wonderful, darling.
I hope she'll be able to understand it.
The show is quite adult, I hear.
How old are you now, Margaret?
Eleven.
Oh.
Why, she'll be able to understand it,
because by the time she can use these tickets, she'll be fifteen.
You have tickets four years in advance.
Why not?
Every night there's a sign in front of the box office that says SRO, standing room only.
So what?
When I was in private life, we had the SRO sign in the box office too.
Yes, it was SRO.
Six rows only.
Just a minute, just a minute.
If you two dolls will excuse me.
Damn Levine.
I've been standing here listening to you two bros,
you two dolls beating each other's brains out.
This one says she's got two seats.
That one says why don't you try standing room?
The other one says it's one of blue ribbons.
So enough already.
Now, what does this kid want, this little Miss Mark O'Brien?
All she wants, darling, is to buy two tickets to your show.
That's all?
Hmm?
For this we went through this hoo-ha and nish-mash with Vivian.
Stop dooming.
Two tickets to guys and dolls can be arranged.
Oh, do you mean you have two tickets?
Well, not with me. Who carries that much cash?
Well, you mean you know you can get a pair of tickets?
What a question there, Sam Levine.
Now, I'd like to ask you a question for your own information.
Who has been on Broadway longer than I have?
Oh, I'm sorry.
That's an unfair question to ask you.
And Mr. Levine, what is the point beside the one your hat is on?
Oh, you're going to start again with the two seats, huh?
Look, Tallulah, what I'm trying to point out to one and all
is that I happen to have connections with a certain highly placed gentleman
who can put their dukes on a pair of dockets for a friend anytime.
And I happen to be that friend.
All that it takes is a telephone call.
I know the right people.
I happen to be the star of the biggest hit on Broadway
and I have plenty of influence.
So show me the telephone and give me a slug.
Don't tempt me.
Sammy, you won't need a slug.
Just pick up any phone here and make your call.
This is NBC. They have thousands of telephones.
Thousands of phones? What a location for a bookie.
Can you stop to think how unfair life can be?
I got a friend, Benny the Book, has one lousy telephone.
They came and they tore it out by the roots.
And besides, they arrested him.
Oh. Did they send him up the river?
No, it was his first offense. He's just up the creek.
Sam, we're going to make a phone call. Here, use this one.
Okay. Yeah, I'm sure he'll be in.
This is Sunday. They don't run anywhere on Sunday.
Sam, you're not calling a horse player to get tickets to your show.
Why not? He's a mutual friend of mine.
A two dollar mutual friend of yours.
Well, I haven't seen him in months.
The last time I saw him was, let's see, May, June, July, Saratoga, September.
Oh, hello, Marvin. Oh, Irving.
Oh, Marvin ain't there. Irving, this is Sam.
Could you ask Joey to run across the street to Manny, Max, and Eddie's
and ask Sal to send Marvin to the phone?
Yeah, tell him it's Sam Levine.
Sam Levine the actor.
All right, Sam Levine the bum.
What? Just for going across the street?
Okay, I'll stand good for it. Go call him.
Look, Sam, if you're going to call every Tom, Dick, and Harry in town...
Who called Tom, Dick, and Harry? I called for Marvin.
Irving said he would send Joey to Manny, Max, and Eddie's.
All right, already. Let's get the tickets.
Okay, so Joey went to call Marvin. It's a person-to-person call.
I don't think the tickets cost five dollars extra.
What's the five dollars for?
Well, you can't expect Joey to walk across the street for nothing.
He only makes $2.50 on it.
The other $2.50 is for the premium for the accident insurance
in case while he's crossing the street he should get knocked down by an automobile.
What am I doing in radio?
I could get myself a pair of track shoes and I'm in business.
Look, Tallulah, I'm doing this for you out of the goodness of my heart.
Plus a small fee for incidentals.
I wouldn't get tickets for anybody else in the world, but for you I'm going to this trouble.
Well, if I'd known you had to put so many men on the job, I wouldn't have asked you.
How long is it going to take?
It'll take only long enough for Joey to get Marvin and then to come to the phone.
Well, Joey should be back by now.
Well, look, figure it out. First he's got his shave.
Then he's got to put on a shirt and a tie.
Shave to go to Manny, Max, and Eddie's? What is it?
One of those fancy restaurants where you can't eat unless you wear a tie?
At Manny, Max, and Eddie's you cannot eat at any time.
It's not a supply store.
A formal auto supply store. You have to dress.
Well, they run a little handbook in the back, and they could get rated any minute.
So how would Joey look in the lineup without a shave and a tie?
Golly, I'm sure.
By the way, I should mention in case they are rated, there'll be an extra $500 added to the tickets. Bail.
Margaret, darling, won't you reconsider that one-way ticket to California?
Yes, maybe it would be cheaper. Meredith, can you give me that railroad ticket back?
See, I'd like to, Margaret, but I gave it to Ken Murray.
Hey, Ken, if you're not going to use that railroad ticket, I...
Oh, I'm sorry, Meredith, but I gave the ticket away to somebody who did me a favor.
Maybe I could get it back for you if I can use the phone.
Hello, Marvin. Oh, Joey. So where's Marvin?
Look, I want you to get me right away a couple of tickets to Guys and Dolls.
All right, Boys and Dolls. So where's Marvin?
He left town. Somebody gave him a Christmas present.
A one-way ticket to California. Oh, fine.
Well, Tallulah, I tried and I failed. Now, there's only one thing left to do.
Here, I'll give you these two tickets that I got in my pocket for tomorrow night.
Oh, damn. You mean that you had those tickets in your pocket all the time?
Yeah, go ahead, take them. I'll let you have them for cost. $40.
$40 for a pair of fitter tickets?
I'd rather wait till your scalpel friend Marvin gets back.
And I can get them from him for less than that.
Tallulah, don't be a schlemiel.
Where do you think Marvin gets his tickets from?
Ladies and gentlemen, that was Meredith Wilson and his big show orchestra and chorus.
We'll be back in a moment, darlings, just as soon as I ring my chimes.
This is NBC, the national broadcasting company.
The big show. This is the national broadcasting company, Sunday Extravaganza,
with the most scintillating personalities in show business.
The big show, the Sunday night feature of NBC's All-Star Festival,
is brought to you by RCA Victor, world leader in radio,
first in recorded music, first in television,
and by the makers of Anisyn, for fast relief from pain of headache,
urinitis, and neuralgia.
And every week, your hostess, the glamorous, unpredictable, Tallulah Bankhead.
Well, darlings, in a few hours, 1951, we'll be here.
I've devoted this entire day to thinking of the things I've done this past year that I shouldn't have.
And I've come up with the most darling resolutions.
I can hardly wait till midnight to start breaking them.
Meanwhile, our show goes on, and one of our guests, little Margaret O'Brien,
keeps tagging after me because she's made up her mind she wants to be an actress in the theatre, just like I am.
I feel as if I'm her fairy grandmother.
That should be Godmother!
That misplaint was deliberate.
Oh, Tallulah?
Yes, Margaret, darling.
I just saw Gloria Swanson and Jose Perera come into the studio.
Yes, Margaret, yes, darling. They're going to do a scene later in the program from 20th Century,
the play they're starring in on Broadway now. It's a drawing room comedy.
What's a drawing room comedy?
Well, drawing room comedy is, well, it's usually a play where a lot of rich people pay 6.60 to see a lot of poor actors
acting like a lot of rich people.
Gee, it must be wonderful to be in a play on Broadway. I wish I was as great an actress as Gloria Swanson.
I beg your pardon, Taz. How about me?
Oh, I mean you too. I wish we both were as great an actress as Gloria.
Darling, I love Gloria no one better. I would be a very dear friend.
But this is her very first day on Broadway. I've been in dozens of plays.
Oh, I know. I know them all. And what fun you must have had in them.
Private Lives, The Little Foxes, Skin of Our Teeth, Dark Victory, Rain, Reflected Glory, Mr. Roberts.
Marvellous. I was never a Mr. Roberts. That's a play with all men in it.
I know, but wouldn't it be fun?
Why, Mr. Roberts? When I was your age, I never...
Oh, well, what were you saying, darling?
I was just thinking how wonderful it would be to be a big star in the theatre
and have your pictures in all the papers and the magazines.
I once saw your picture on the cover of Life magazine.
How did you ever get them to put your picture on the cover of Life?
Well, someday, darling, I'll explain the facts of life.
Oh, I've been meaning to ask you. Can I have your autograph?
Why, of course, dear child.
Would you write it on these three pieces of paper?
Well, an autograph and triplicate, I am honoured.
I need three because the kids outside the theatre told me that for three Tallulah bankheads,
you can get one Gloria Swanson.
I was just stabbed.
Oh, I didn't mean what you think. I meant what I said.
I mean, I meant because everybody wants your autograph, that's why I'd like three of them.
And very few people want Gloria Swanson. You see? Does that sound better?
Darling, have you ever thought of giving up the theatre and becoming a surgeon?
You put that knife in so gently.
Hey, Tallulah. Yes, Ken Murray?
I just saw Gloria Swanson and Jose Ferrer come in the studio.
Yeah, so I've been told.
Gee, that Gloria Swanson, she sure looks young for her age, doesn't she?
I look younger for my age and she does for her age.
Dad, I did it. I knew it would happen. I finally insulted myself.
Now, wait a minute, Tallulah. Now, wait a minute. Let me figure that thing out.
Now, if you say that you're younger for your age than she is for her age,
then that makes you older age for age. Is that it?
No, no. What I meant is that I'm younger for the age I say I am
than she is for the age she really is.
And that's older than the age she says she is or the age I really am.
Would you mind repeating that question?
Well, what I'm trying to explain, Ken, is you say she looks young for her age
and I said that I'm younger for the age I say I am
than she is for the age she really is,
which is older than the age she says she is, which is older than the age I really am.
How many witches were in that sentence?
Only two.
Ken, may I ask you a question?
Why, yes, Margaret.
Why do you always hold that cigar when you're on stage?
Oh, I don't know. It's an old habit. Sort of puts me at ease.
Here, have one. Try it.
Thank you.
Hello, Tallulah.
Well, Fran Warren, darling.
APPLAUSE
Say, you know who I just saw backstage?
Gloria Swanson and Jose Ferrer.
She looks so young for her age, doesn't she?
He looks pretty young for her age too, darling.
And, Fran, may I say that you look divine for your age, whatever it is.
What are you going to sing for, sweetie pie?
I've got the right to sing the blues.
At her age, look who's got the right to sing the blues.
Go ahead, darling, sing it.
MUSIC
I've got the right to sing the blues.
I've got the right to feel the down.
I've got a right to hang around, down around the river.
A certain man in this old town keeps dragging my poor heart around.
All I see for me is misery.
I've got a right to sing the blues.
I've got a right to moan and sigh.
I've got a right to sit and cry, down around the river.
I know the deep blue sea will soon be calling me.
It must be love, say what you choose.
I've got a right to sing the blues.
I know the deep blue sea will soon be calling to me.
It must be love, say what you choose.
I've got a right to sing the blues.
I've got a right to sing the blues.
APPLAUSE
Here's a word from RCA Victor.
As we look ahead to the gigantic tasks our country must perform in 1951,
it's clear that every individual's working life is going to be busier and more complicated than ever before.
We're all going to need recreation in our home lives to erase the cares of each long day
and recharge our batteries for the next one.
That's where television fits in perfectly.
And now is the time to see your RCA Victor dealer and choose from 18 beautiful models,
each one seemingly more beautiful than the next.
You do well to choose a 19-inch set for pictures that are wonderfully clear and big.
Of course, they'll have that matchless quality which has made RCA Victor million-proof television far and away America's favorite.
Here's wishing you RCA Victor Television and with it, the high morale,
which will help so much to make 1951 a happier year for everyone.
MUSIC
You know, darlings, the holiday season is traditionally a time of extraordinary excitement in the theater.
But these holidays brought us a little more than the ordinary extraordinary.
ANTA, meaning American National Theater and Academy,
marked a red-letter day in its worthy history when it presented Gloria Swanson,
Jose Ferrer, and an all-star cast in Mr. Ferrer's revival of that famous hit play of the 1931-32 season, 20th Century.
So tremendous has been the public response that the play is moving over to the Fulton Theater for an extended run.
We'll give you a taste of the kind of evening you can look forward to at the Fulton
by presenting now a scene from the play starring Ms. Swanson and Mr. Ferrer.
Ladies and gentlemen, the curtain is up on 20th Century.
MUSIC
This is the story of an eccentric Broadway producer named Oscar Jaffe and his meal ticket,
a glamorous bundle of talent and temperament, Lily Garland.
This is the story of an overnight train trip on the 20th Century Limited from Chicago to New York.
TRAIN WHISTLE
We are several hours east of the leader, Ohio, as the scene of the play begins.
Lily, played by Ms. Gloria Swanson, faints sleep in her apartment.
Sadie, the watchful maid, is not at all surprised when the door opens and Oscar Jaffe, played by Mr. Jose Ferrer,
recognizes the situation.
TRAIN WHISTLE
Another word, Sadie. We must not wake her.
Poor child, nobody understands her. She's very delicate.
If you don't mind, I'll just sit here and watch.
She's very delicate. If you don't mind, I'll just sit here for a moment and breathe the air that surrounds her,
look at her little possessions, and remember things.
Sadie, who's in there?
Oh, I'm sorry I woke you up.
So it's you. You sneaked in while I was asleep.
What do you want, scorpion?
If it makes you any happier to call me names, go right ahead.
Oscar, you're complete. You're the most horrible excuse for a human being that ever walked on two legs.
As you've always misunderstood me, Lily, you lack the true intuitive gifts to appreciate great love.
Your philosophy of love doesn't interest me, Mr. Jaffe.
I'm an oriental, Lily. Love blinded me.
There was always a trouble between us as producer and artist.
Oh, so that's what it was, was it?
How about your name in electric lights, bigger than everybody's, your grand illusions that you were a Shakespeare and Napoleon,
and the grand llama of Tibet, all rolled into one?
You're absolutely right.
What?
I'm big enough to admit it. I never appreciated your real greatness until I lost you.
Why, that last quibble we had about percentages, gad, how small, how cheap I was.
What egotism, not to know that it was Lily Garland and not Oscar Jaffe that night.
Running all over town telling people that I, that you had to put chalk marks on the stage so that I'd know where to stand.
That you had to teach me to talk like a parrot.
Gad, it was despicable I could cut my throat, but I've paid for it a thousand times since.
When I saw that last movie of yours, I only blamed myself.
Oh, you've seen it, have you?
Well, you'll be glad to know that it's a tremendous success.
I'm marvelous in it, too.
Don't say that, Lily, please.
Here, if you don't believe me, look at this.
Now, where did you get this dreadful thing? For bowling?
Well, read what it says.
The Academy of Motion Picture.
Art and science.
It's pathetic, isn't it?
Don't fall for this sort of thing, Lily.
There were moments in the film when you were marvelous.
Yes, they couldn't stop the real Lily from coming through several times.
But that cheap story, that clumsy, unimaginative director,
well, he must have been related to the bank.
Well, you're right there. And you want to know why?
The director was an idiot. I couldn't get anything into his head.
I had to fight him all the time.
It was tactfulish to throw you away on a man like that.
I wouldn't have him for my office boy.
And the lighting in that picture.
Don't you remember how I always brought the lights up every time you stepped on the stage?
You became a radiant creature to the audience.
People left the theater feeling that they had gone through some great spiritual experience.
I left that movie house feeling that some magnificent ruby had been set in a platter of lard.
You put yourself back ten years, Lily.
But we can mend that. You'll be greater than ever.
Listen, Oscar, if all that the dodger's by any chance preliminary to a contract,
you can save your breath because I might...
Who said anything about contracts? Shame on you, Lily.
What are you talking about? You'd do anything to get my name on a contract.
This brilliant trophy, this obscene-led statue must be doing things to you.
I didn't come in here with contract.
I came with a dream we both had long ago.
The thing we planned as a climax to your career.
The last golden stair.
Look out.
The courtesan. The great courtesan rose.
Oh, look out. Oh, no.
So this is a big surprise you have for me.
Another part where I'm unworthy of the lieutenant's love and make the great sacrifice.
I wouldn't sneer if I were you.
All right, what is it this time? Montezuma again or that big drama about Hetananny, the pride of the gas house?
No, Lily, it's none of these things.
This happens to be the greatest woman of all time.
Just her memory has kept the world weeping for centuries.
The Magdalene.
Magdalene who?
Now, you listen to me, Lily Garland.
I'm going to put on the passion play in New York with Lily Garland as Mary Magdalene.
I've had it up my sleeve all this time, waiting for the right moment.
The wickedest woman of her age.
Pencil, heartless and beautiful.
Corrupting everything she touches, running the gamut from the gutter to glory.
Can't you see her, Lily? This little wanton reduced to helplessness.
Standing in the street, starving and wet through with her own tears.
I'm going to have Pontius Pilate ride by in a chariot and I'm going to splash mud all over her.
No, no, no, wait. A pilot sees me.
He does a test. His horse, his horse, uh, both.
And Pontius is thrown out on his feet with a broken neck.
Oh, and I smile through my tears.
Very touching inspiration. Go on while you're in the creative mood.
Well, I'll tell you how I see the whole thing.
I can see the Magnum as a woman who was an aristocrat at the beginning.
And after being broken hearted by some man she loved madly and trusted,
she went down, down, down.
Into the dead.
Hating and despising all men. Laughing at them so cruel. So terribly cruel.
Yes, Lily, I'm going to make it my greatest production. Gamble every penny on it.
I've brought over an entire troop from Europe.
Smuggled them across the Alps right through four iron curtains.
It cost me my shirt, but I wanted them. Two of them are geniuses.
No, wait a minute, Oscar.
Lily, if the play runs for five years, I won't make a dollar.
You can have all the money. I only want to stagger New York.
A desert scene with a hundred camels and real fans brought over from the Holy Land.
I'm going to have a Babylonian banquet that you give for your lover in the second act.
The governor of Judea punches Pilate with your flames all around you.
You're covered with emeralds and that seems from head to foot.
But that's nothing to the finish, for you stand in rags.
Rags?
In rags, and the emperor Nero himself offers you half his empire.
You answer him with a speech that is probably the greatest piece of literature ever written
and figured with love and pacifism and all the lights just pouring down on you.
Nero crazy.
And the last wish of you is this little pathetic figure selling olives in the marketplace.
Lily, it's a blime. Tell me, have I reached the artist in you?
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.
What is it?
You're crazy.
What do you mean?
You're a poor case of leaping paranoia.
Lily.
No, I am not angry.
You're too funny to make anybody angry.
Don't be cheap, Lily.
Coming in here with a lot of camels and real fans from the Holy Land, you're a screed.
You're going to put on the passion play.
Oh, you have a hundred dollars to your name.
I can raise millions, millions.
Yes, and I know how you intend to raise them.
Get my name on a contract and go out peddling it.
Shake down some new angel on the strength of my reputation.
Well, no, thank you. I am thrilled being your meal ticket.
You're at liberty to call up any one of my banks in the morning.
Your banks?
You mean the ones that are taking your theaters away from you?
That's a lie. You've been listening to my enemies.
I've been listening to Mr. Oliver Webber, a so-called business manager who broke in here with a sob story about
that you were going to commit suicide unless I took pity on you.
Well, you go on and commit it.
It would be a blessing to all concerned.
Lily, what in heaven's name are you talking about?
Mr. Webber's no longer with me.
I fired him for stealing.
Oh, shut up. I've had enough of your lies.
I'm offering you your one last chance to become immortal.
Thank you, but I've decided to stay mortal with a responsible management.
Not Jacob.
I can't believe it.
No, read the papers in the morning.
Jacob, he's got parishes. I had to fire him to protect the health of my office.
He's a thief, besides, illiterate. He can hardly write his name.
He writes it on text all right and great big text.
Oh, it's money you want. That's what you want.
Just another Broadway hand, that's what you've become.
I suppose if I jiggle the miserable ten or fifteen thousand dollars in front of your nose,
your mouth would begin to water. You'd start drooling and squealing,
Gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme.
That's right, Oscar. Now get out of here before I have a porter show you not thrown off the train.
Look how who gets thrown off the train.
Get out of here, you fake, you swindler, you.
Hit me, you cheap little sharp girl.
Get out before I call the conductor.
Go on, ring that bell. I'll tell the world who the fake you are.
I made you. I took everything you know. Your voice, your walk, your cheap little talent. They are mine.
I gave them to you. I gave up everything to breathe them into you.
Even your name, Lily Garland, I gave you that.
For the lady conductor.
Well, as sure as there's a God in heaven, Mildred Platt, there.
You'll line up where you belong. In Burlap.
You, you, low.
Ring the bell. I'll tell the whole train. I'll tell the whole world. Mildred Platt.
Conductor, conductor, throw this man out. Throw him off the train.
Bravo, Gloria and Jose. Come here, darling, come over here.
That was so fun. That excerpt from your brilliant production of 20th Century.
Gee, thanks, Faloula.
I find it a lot of fun working in the theatre, Faloula.
I bet you do. And Jose, you directed a play for Broadway, didn't you?
Well, as a matter of fact, uh...
Oh, I read the wonderful notes that the critics gave you.
Yes, they certainly were.
Not only for your direction, but for your acting.
Well, they were awful.
I understand the theatre's selling out, but it should make you very happy.
Well, of course, yes.
Oh, darling, I know you like it, darling.
It's just, oh, we're telling you how wonderful your play is, but I certainly must interrupt you.
But if you'd only give me a chance to say something, then you could interrupt me.
Oh, of course, darling, go right ahead.
But all I wanted to say was that I'd like to go up to my dressing room and change my shirt.
I'll be back in a moment.
Oh, why, of course, darling, go right ahead.
You're ringing west. That's it. Right to there, darling.
You gave a wonderful performance. You were superb. And so beautifully directed.
See you later, darling.
Boor.
Well, Gloria, Gloria, it's so nice to have a motion picture star on the program.
We really should just to plug some picture she just made.
The old picture was such an enormous success, darling, that doesn't need any plugs.
Well, what's the news from out in Hollywood?
You mean, what's new along Sunset Boulevard?
Ha ha ha. You slipped one in, didn't you, darling?
Well, let's forget business and just talk some old-fashioned girl talk.
Just between the two of us.
Yes, girl talk just between the three of us.
Oh, Margaret. I forgot all about you.
Oh, Gloria, you know Margaret O'Brien, of course.
Yes, hello, Margaret.
Hello, Gloria, darling.
Margaret is going to become an actress in the theater.
Isn't that sweet?
Well, Gloria, I bet you must be exhausted from working in the theater.
Oh, yes, we'd have a cigarette.
No, thank you, Salilla. I don't care for one now.
Have a cigar, darling.
No, thank you, Margaret, darling. Cigar?
Oh, I just carry it to put me at my ease.
Ha ha ha.
Well, Gloria, I was in Hollywood, you know, just a couple of weeks ago.
I saw everybody and everybody was talking about...
It's Navy.
I'll tell you.
Well, everybody was talking about you know who.
Oh, yes. He's been behaving terribly, I heard.
Terribly. He had me upset to come to the studio with the... what's-her-name.
With what's-her-name? Where was her husband?
Oh, darling, he was driving that blonde hoosier down to Palm, or whatchamacallit.
Well, no, darling, no.
You don't say, darling.
Margaret, please, you don't know what we're talking about.
Oh, yes, I do. I've heard this story before.
What?
This is the first time I've heard the details.
Where, may I ask, did you hear this story?
Oh, from some of the kids on the loft. Dean Stockwell, Lionel Barrymore.
That said Lionel is incorrigible. I'm going to tell his kids at the Apple about it.
Oh, Tallulah, I almost forgot, and I don't know whether I should mention this or not,
but I just read in the paper where that certain friend of yours got that wonderful award
for the Best Motion Picture Performance of the Year for the Critics Circle.
Which proves what I've always suspected.
The Critics Circle is a bunch of squares.
Well, don't you agree, darling?
Well, I'd like to, but I might want to make another picture in another 20 years.
Well, now, what was the matter with the picture you made, that Sunset Peak?
I thought it was brilliant.
It's Sunset Boulevard, Tallulah.
Oh, well, I saw it in the neighborhood, too.
Well, whatever it was called, it certainly deserved the award,
because the same thing, you know, happened to me a few years ago when I made a magnificent picture.
Oh, yes, I saw it. Life saver, wasn't it?
You were superb.
Life both, darling.
Well, whatever flavor it was, I thought it gave the outstanding performance of the year.
Ladies, if I may say a word.
Oh, you backhoe, darling.
Speaking of great pictures, you're forgetting a picture that I made this year, Cyrano de Bejrak.
Darling, don't stick your nose into this argument.
Well, I made a picture once called Journey for Margaret,
and I thought it would win the Critics Award.
And when it didn't, did I write them a nasty letter?
This child will someday grow up to be the President of the United States.
If you would like to know a quick, easy way to ease the pain of a headache, neuritis, or neuralgia,
then by all means, try Anisyn.
Your own dentist or physician may at one time or another have handed you an envelope containing Anisyn tablets.
Then you already know how incredibly fast and effectively Anisyn brings relief.
Anisyn is like a doctor's prescription.
That is, Anisyn contains not just one, but a combination of medically proven active ingredients.
For your own sake, try Anisyn.
Anisyn is sold to you on this guarantee.
If the first few tablets do not give you all the relief you want as fast as you want it,
you may return the unused portion and your money will be refunded.
You can get Anisyn tablets at any drug counter.
Anisyn comes in handy boxes of 12 and 30 tablets and economical family-sized bottles of 50 and 100.
Music
Jose, I want you to have a little talk with Margaret O'Brien.
She's so interested in becoming an actress in the theatre,
and I really don't know of a more expert artist who can come to for advice.
Well, that's quite flattering, Delula.
I'd appreciate any help you can give me, Mr. Ferrer.
I know the child is quite young.
Nonsense. One of the greatest thoughts ever written was for a young girl,
because the character was supposed to have been 14 years old.
I'm referring, of course, to Juliet and the immortal Romeo and Juliet.
How old are you, child?
Oh, I just turned 14.
You know, you might well play her to death.
Oh, this little girl played Juliet, Jose.
Some of the greatest actresses of the theatre played it.
Jane Cowell, Judy Marlowe, Catherine Cornell, and Miss Ethel Barrymore.
I know, Delula, but I've always thought it would be interesting to have the 14-year-old Juliet
played by a 14-year-old actress.
I wonder if you would read a scene with me, Margaret,
the famous balcony scene.
Oh, may I? Jose, are you mad?
Now, how can a 14-year-old child run the gamut of emotion necessary
to portray the exacting role of a girl torn from the arms of a man she loves,
frustrated every turn by parents who finally drive the lover to their destruction?
What could this child possibly know about love?
Why, when I was 14 years old, I never...
Margaret, maybe you'd better try to play it again.
Oh, excuse me, Delula, before Mr. Perer and Miss O'Brien appears, Romeo and Juliet,
I wish to say that this portion of the program was brought to you by RCA Victor,
world leader in radio, first in recorded music, first in television,
and by the makers of Anisyn, for fast relief from pain of headache,
eritis, and neurosis.
Now, Delula, would you bring your child?
This is NBC, the national broadcast of something.
This is the big show.
And Margaret O'Brien, one of the guest stars, is about to realize her lifelong ambition
to become an actress in the legitimate theater.
All right, everybody, on stage, a star is about to be born.
I want you all to watch this, but you blame...
What's going on?
Jose Perez is going to act out a beautiful scene with Margaret O'Brien.
That guy is going to act with that little doll?
Vivian, what is this guy and doll talk?
You mean that you don't know what a guy is and what a doll is
from the play of the same name where I talk like this?
No, I don't know what a guy is and a doll is
from the play of the same name where you talk like that, darling.
Well, listen to me, I'll be glad to explain you.
And darling, they've been trying to explain me for years.
Well, to move it, darling, I'll explain you very simple.
Do you ever go to Lindy's for a bite?
If I'm going to be bitten, I'd rather be bitten at the store store.
What I mean is, do you ever go to eat at Lindy's?
No, I rarely dress for dinner.
Yes? From this, a person can catch a cold.
Well, what about Lindy's?
Well, we'll say, for instance, Lindy is packed to the gills.
It is impossible physically, if you'll pardon the expression,
to squeeze, if you'll pardon the expression, another person.
But at one table for four are sitting two fellas,
and the other two seats are bare.
If you'll pardon the expression.
Excuse me.
So the two girls walk over to the table where the two fellas are sitting
with the two bare seats, and they ask the two fellas
politely, are the two bare seats occupied?
But the fellas go on eating and don't even answer.
Well, those two girls are dogs.
And the two men are guys.
They're slobs.
But if they invited the girls to have dinner with them, would they be guys?
Well, if it's Dutch treat, they're guys.
But if the guys paid for the girls' dinner?
Oh, well, those guys would be dogs.
So those are the kind of people that are in your show, guys and dogs.
Would I fit into your show?
Well, if you were in our show, we'd have to call it guys and darlings.
Well, Vivian, although your explanation was confusing,
I must admit it was quite dull.
Likewise, I'm still a...
So let's get back to Margaret O'Brien and the part of Juliet.
Vivian, have you seen Juliet?
Not since the show opened.
I've been meaning to call her, but I've been so busy.
Vivian, dear, Juliet has been dead for years.
No kidding!
Now, I'm really sorry I didn't call her.
You know, a patient should never put off till tomorrow.
Yes, well, we all have to go sometime.
Sammy, Sam Levine, come over here.
I want you to watch this, too.
What's the pitch?
Margaret O'Brien and Hilda Ferrer are doing a scene from Romeo and Juliet.
And for this, you broke up my pinnacle game.
It's a wonderful scene where Romeo meets Juliet on the balcony.
A very good place to meet a doll.
I met more dolls on the balcony of Louis Pitkin's theater.
This balcony happens to be Louis Verona.
And Ken Murray, wait a minute.
Now, why are you sneaking off?
You aren't interested in Romeo and Juliet.
Oh, sure, I'm smoking one now.
I'm talking about Hilda Ferrer.
That's a good cigar, too.
I mean Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet.
Oh, yes, Tallulah, I'm sorry. I know it very well.
Oh, did you ever play Romeo and Juliet?
Oh, sure.
And how did you do?
Rand 2nd paid 16.80 to play.
So, it's Bronson, Fran Warren, let's listen to Hoda Ferrer play Romeo to Margaret O'Brien's Juliet.
Go ahead, Hoda.
Well, Margaret, are you familiar with the lines of the scene?
Oh, yes.
We kids on the lot used to play Romeo and Juliet all the time.
I bet that Lionel Barrymore kid must have made a great Romeo.
Well, now, why don't we try a few lines from the scene that begins,
But soft, what light through yonder window breaks?
You remember?
Oh, yes.
But soft, what light through yonder window breaks?
It is the east, and Juliet is the sun.
Arise, fair sun, and kill the envious moon,
Who is already sick and pale with grief,
That thou, her maid, art far more fair than she.
Be not her maid, since she is envious.
Her best delivery is but sick and green,
And none but fools do wear it.
Cast it off.
It is my lady.
Oh, it is my love.
Ami.
She speaks.
Oh, speak again, bright angel,
For thou art as glorious to this night being on my head
As is a winged messenger of heaven unto the fight
Of turn'd wondering eyes of mortals that fall back to gaze on him
When he decides the lacedly-pacing cloud
And sails upon the bosom of the air.
Romeo, Romeo, wherefore art thou Romeo?
Deny thy father, and refuse thy name.
O thou wilt not be but sworn my loving,
I'll no longer be a Capulet.
Shall I hear more, or shall I speak of this?
Tis but thy name that is my enemy.
Thou art thyself, though not a Montague.
What's Montague?
This nor hand, nor foot, nor arm, nor face,
Nor any other part belonging to a man.
O, be some other name.
What's in the name?
That which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet.
So Romeo would, were he not Romeo called,
retain that dear perception which he owes without that title.
O Romeo, we adore thy name, we fall thy name,
which is no part of thee.
Take all myself.
I take thee at thy word.
Call me but love, and I'll be new baptized.
Henceforth I never will be Romeo.
What man art thou that dost be screened in night,
To stumble upon my counsel?
By a name I know not how to tell thee who I am.
My name, dear saint, is hateful to myself,
because it is an enemy to thee.
Had I it written, I would tear the word.
My ears have not yet drunk a hundred words for thy tongue's utterance.
Yet I know the sound.
Hast thou not Romeo and a Montague?
Neither, fair maid, if either thee dislike.
How camest thou hither? Tell me, and wherefore?
Or should walls are high and hard to climb,
and the place death, considering who thou art,
if any of my kinsmen find thee here?
With love's light wings did I o'erperch these walls,
for stony limits cannot hold love out,
and what love can do, that dares love attempt.
Therefore thy kinsmen are no less to me.
It is almost morning. I would have thee gone.
And yet, no father than a wanton bird,
who lets it hop a little from her hand,
and with a silk thread tucks it back again,
so lovingly jealous of its liberty.
I would, I were, thy bird.
Sweet, so would I.
Yet I could kill thee with much cherishing.
Good night, good night,
parting with such sweet sorrow.
And I shall say good night till it be morrow.
Applause
Thank you, darling.
And whose day your little contribution was as usual divine.
Laughter
Ah, isn't he sweet?
Laughter
Just a minute, kid.
I wouldn't bow that low if I were you.
Your rubber panties are showing.
Laughter
But Tallulah, I was only acknowledging the product
of the multitude.
I wish I had time to get to the famous death scene.
That might be a raise.
Laughter
If you'll give me a moment to go out
and get a little something,
I'd like to see you do the poisonous drinking scene.
Oh, would you enjoy that, Tallulah?
That's for the dregs, dear.
Wait a minute, wait a minute.
What are you picking on the kid for?
I think she's done real good.
You think she's done real good?
I think she did real good.
All right, did real good.
The little doll's got class.
But, Pam, darling, the role of Juliet should be played by an actress
who has had much more experience than Margaret had.
She's so young.
All right, I'll give you that.
She ain't no Irene did.
Laughter
Irene's done.
Well, make up your mind.
Laughter
I don't think you'd require such a depth of perception, such inner fire.
Oh, I would do very well indeed.
But of course, you can't expect a child to have the third dimension that I have.
Well, it's as broad as it's long.
Laughter
Personally, I think she made a fine Juliet.
I'd like to hear you do it better.
I was wondering when you'd stop ad-libbing and get to that line.
Laughter
I'll show you a side of Juliet you never saw before.
From a balcony?
Laughter
All right, go ahead.
Oh, Romeo, Romeo, wherefore art thou, darling?
Laughter
Here I am, Julie, right under the fire escape.
Laughter
Deny thy father and refuse thy name.
Refuse my name?
All right, so I'm Jessica Dragonet.
Laughter
Oh, Pam, stop that.
Don't you know the romantic story of Romeo and Juliet?
Well, let me put it this way.
No.
Laughter
You never heard of Romeo and Juliet?
So kill me, I never heard of it.
Laughter
Pam, you're in the theater. Where have you been all these years?
Well, three men, a horse, room service, light up the sky, and now I'm in Guy's and Dow.
But this Shakespeare, I don't dig already.
So don't dig it. Let him lay there already.
Laughter
And I'll tell you the story of Romeo and Juliet, or as you would call it, a guy and a dog.
Now this guy Romeo comes from a wealthy family, the Montagues.
They're in the woolen business.
Ice business, legit.
Yes.
And the dog family is well-heeled, too.
They're capulets. They operate a chain of flower stores.
And that's how she knows and erodes by another name.
Still, if you'll pardon the expression, slow.
Laughter
Well, that figures. And from the flower shops they make money?
So all right.
All right.
They do a little book making in back of the store.
Laughter
Well, that's...
So the guy and the dog, they got a yen for each other. But the family's object.
Ah, huh.
Laughter
Before they married, they already got mother-in-law trouble.
No, it ain't the mother-in-law, it's the father.
You see, the old man is a Montague, he's in the woolen business.
And old man Capulet is in the flower business.
So where's the competition?
The Montague's make tooth without button holes in the lapels.
And it's ruining the Capulet flower business.
Laughter
What a lousy trick.
Laughter
The guy and the dog want to get married, so they elope.
And later the dog's father doesn't know she's married.
So he wanted to marry another guy.
And so the dog lays down on the bed and makes it look like she's dead.
And Romeo finds it and thinks she is dead, so he kills himself.
And when the dog wakes up and he finds the guy's knocked himself off, so the dog knocks himself off.
Well, that's the finish of the play.
That's the finish?
That is the finish.
Well, I don't know.
You don't know what?
If they got some big hit songs, they've got a chance.
Laughter
What's the name of that play again?
Death of a Woolen Civil.
Laughter
What difference does it make?
You wouldn't understand if I spent the rest of this year explaining it to you.
And there isn't much left of this year.
1950 is almost over.
And in a few hours, it'll be 1951.
A new year.
I don't know where the time goes.
It seems there should be another month in the year to do all the things we forgot to do.
A month to remember what we forgot.
October, November, December, remember.
It even rhymes, doesn't it, darling?
A whole month of days to remember a kind deed we should have done.
A soft word we could have spoken.
A friendly smile we should have restored.
Jose, what do you think?
I think that your month of remember should have at least 31 days.
We could all use 31 days of grace devoted to undoing some of the unthinking things we did during the year.
Well said, Jose, and I think we can carry the idea further and make it a month for the whole world to stop and remember what a wonderful place this could be to live in if man would really be brother to man.
You're so right, Gloria.
The grown-ups would only take this month of remember not to forget that the world they're making today is a world the kids of my age are going to have to live in tomorrow.
Margaret, that's a beautiful pitch.
Every grift around Broadway, every crumb on every street corner, every pinhorn on 42nd Street.
If we could only give them an extra month to remember, they might have less to try to forget when they go to sleep at night.
Yes, Dan, and with this extra month of remember, what a chance it would be for the guys and dolls on Broadway and in Hollywood to remember that there's a real world outside the little dream world they live in.
You're so right, Vivian. I sure could use that extra month just to sit around and remember all the kind and unselfish people who helped me up a few rungs of that long, rough ladder.
Fran, that's a beautiful sentiment. You know, I didn't think too kindly about this extra month at first.
I got to thinking about the extra bills that would come in on the first of remember and the income tax on remember the 15th.
But believe me, give me that extra month to remember some of the things I could have done better in the 12 months we've had, and I'll pay those extra bills.
Ken, you're right. But, Tallulah, you know what I would do if we could make this a universal month?
I'd spend every one of the days talking to people everywhere in the world in the universal language, music.
Then tell the world, Meredith, with some of the new and lovely words of that universal language, some of the great songs from some of the great shows of the year passed by.
It's the Big Show Medley of the Big Shows of 1950, opening with one of the newest and gay and the most recent of musical hits, Meredith Wilson's The Big Show Orchestra and chorus in Guys and Dolls.
What you doing? What you doing?
I love you, a bushel and a peck, a bushel and a peck, and it beats me all to heck, beats me all to heck.
How I'll ever tend to barf, ever tend to barf when I want to keep my arm above you.
About you, about you, talking all about you, can I live without you?
Because I love you, a bushel and a peck, you bet your birdie neck I do.
Because I love you, a bushel and a peck, and you bet your birdie neck I do.
I do.
From South Pacific, Vivian Blaine sings.
I'm gonna wash that man right out of my hair.
I'm gonna wash that man right out of my hair.
I'm gonna wash that man right out of my hair and send him on his way.
I'm gonna wave that man right out of my arms.
I'm gonna wave that man right out of my arms.
I'm gonna wave that man right out of my arms and send him on his way.
Don't try to patch it up, pair it up, pair it up.
Wash them out, dry them out, push them out, dry them out.
Cancel him and let him go.
I'm gonna wash that man right out of my hair.
I'm gonna wash that man right out of my hair.
I'm gonna wash that man right out of my hair.
And send him on his way.
The Big Show Chorus and Orchestra in Melrose's arrangement of Irving Berlin's smash hit song,
Call Me Madam.
Put your head on my shoulder,
Give me someone who's older,
And rock down with a beltless rope.
Stars that used to twinkle in the sky,
Start twinkling in my eyes.
I wonder why.
Why is singing endless, no one's there?
I spell a blessing and the trees are there.
All day long I keep to walk on it.
I wonder why.
I wonder why.
I keep counting in my sleep at night,
And once more I love my appetite.
Stars that used to twinkle in the sky,
Start twinkling in my eyes.
I wonder why.
And now our own Fran Warren sings another great 1950 hit.
Here's one of the best songs to speak to.
Ooh.
Strange dear, but true dear,
When I'm close to you dear,
The stars fill the sky,
Who in love with you am I,
Even without you,
My arms hold about you.
You know darling why,
When in love with you am I,
In love with a night mysterious,
The night when your first was end,
In love with my joy delirious,
When I knew that you could care.
So taunt me and hurt me,
Deceive me, desert me,
I'm yours till I die.
So in love,
So in love,
So in love with you my love,
Am I.
Don't stop the music Melody, you haven't heard yet from Tallulah.
Here it is darlings my big song of 1950.
Give my regards to Broadway, remember me to Harrow Square.
So in love,
So in love,
That made the world and time
All time, my dear
All time
That made the world and time
All time
So give my regards to Old Broadway
And say that I'll be there along
Oh, thank you, darling, thank you, darling.
And now I think we'll be very nice of the orchestra
and all the cast and everybody would sing Old Lang Syne.
But Miss Bankhead, we already did that.
You see, nobody ever tells me anything on this program.
Oh, well, darling, this winds up our New Year's show.
And we ask you to be with us at this time next week
when our stars will be Fred Allen, Marlene Edithric,
Portland Hoffer, Edward D. Robinson, Danny Thomas,
Fran Warren and others, and of course, Meredith Wilson
and his big show orchestra and chorus.
Until then, may the good Lord bless and keep you
whether near or far away.
Fran, may you find that long-awaited golden day today.
Jose, may your troubles all be small ones
and your fortune ten times ten.
Vivian, may the good Lord bless and keep you
till we meet again.
Sam, may you walk with sunlight shining
and a bluebird in every tree.
Meredith?
May there be a silver lining
back of every cloud you see.
Margaret?
Till your dreams with sweet tomorrows,
never mind what might have been.
Gloria?
May the good Lord bless and keep you
till we meet again.
Ken?
May you walk with the sunlight shining
and a bluebird in every tree.
May there be a silver lining
back of every cloud you see.
Till your dreams with sweet tomorrows,
never mind what might have been.
May the good Lord bless and keep you
till we meet again.
May the good Lord bless and keep you
till we meet again.
Happy New Year, darling.
Listen to the Big Show next Sunday
when we'll have with us
Fred Allen,
Marlene Dietrich,
Portland Hoffa,
Edward G. Robinson,
Danny Thomas,
Ben Warren,
Meredith Wilson,
and the Big Show Orchestra and Chorus and others.
And of course, as always,
the glamorous, unpredictable
Delula Bankhead.
20th Century was written by Ben Hecht and Charles MacArthur
based on a play by Bruce Charles.
And adapted for radio by Frank Lueb.
The Big Show is directed and produced by D. Engelbach
and written by Goodman Ace
with George Foster and Mort Green.
This is A. Hurley.
He's saying Happy New Year.
Now, Phil and Alex,
later here at Theatre Guild State Fair on NBC.