You are bound to be entertained by some of the biggest names in show business.
For the next hour and thirty minutes, this program will present in person such bright stars as...
Faye Bolter,
Jerry Cooper,
Delta Ribbon Boys,
Danny Kaye,
Maxie Rosenblum,
Rudy Vallee,
Julie Wilson,
Meredith Wilson,
and my name darling is Tallulah Bankhead.
The National Broadcasting Company presents...
The Big Show!
Ninety minutes with the most intimidating personalities in the entertainment world.
Brought to you this Sunday and every Sunday at the same time as the Sunday feature of NBC's All-Star Festival.
And here is your hostess,
the glamorous,
unpredictable,
Tallulah Bankhead!
Well darling,
this is the one big show that I've been waiting for all season.
Did you get a load of all those wonderful men NBC lined up for me?
I got half of mine not to take the money this week.
That's the half I'm sending to a psychoanalyst.
Well I was the only woman on the show that at the last moment some smart addict booked in that gorgeous gal,
Julie Wilson, to sing.
Until then it was a wonderful week,
rehearsing with all the divine men,
holding hands,
going out to dinner and holding hands,
dancing with them and holding them all.
Of course I expect my tech this week to be practically all withholding.
But you know men,
towards the end of the week they became almost unmanageable.
Kissing and hugging and really acting scusstily.
Honestly I don't see how that Julie Wilson can stand it.
Men, they're all alike.
Not me Miss Bankhead, I ain't alike.
That's your Maxi Rosenblum.
Now Maxi, you haven't forsaken me for Julie Wilson.
I don't think so.
What does forsaken mean?
Well I mean you haven't given me up for Julie.
Ah, no. I don't go out of my class.
You're more my weight.
Look Rosenblum,
don't start any fights with me.
Oh by the way, how many fights have you had in your career?
418.
Any of them with men?
Yeah, some of them.
Well I've been on this program only 12 weeks,
and believe me darling, I've had more fights than that.
Well you ain't gonna fight with me. I'm not fighting no more.
Well now that you're out of the fight game Maxi,
what are you doing with yourself?
Well I have been playing night club.
I've just been down at Baltimore.
Oh I'd go over very big with them Baltimore aunts.
Well what do you do to divert your cafe clear and clear?
What?
Well Maxi, I know that you'll pardon me and I mean no offense,
but I noticed that you talk rather peculiarly.
I mean, did you ever get hit hard in the nose at the boxing ground?
Yeah that's right. It's still up there.
Well darling, I would have given anything to have seen you in one of your fights.
What was your best punch Maxi?
Well I used to have a left jab and a right hook.
I used to call it my Sunday punch.
Oh, did you win many fights with your Sunday punch?
They never let me fight on Sunday.
Well of course not darling, that's my night.
But tell me Maxi, I'm a little confused.
Now are you the one who was involved with that long count in Chicago?
No, but once I was mixed up with a short countess in Detroit.
Ah, a romance Maxi?
No, I boxed her.
Well the fight game must be pretty tough in spite of the big money you can make.
Yeah and it's worse today.
Today prices are so high, years ago you could get a piece of steak for 20 cents
and put it on one eye.
And get another piece of steak for the other eye for 20 cents.
And that's how you got your 2020 vision?
What?
Maxi, why do you keep saying what all the time?
Listen Tallulah, when I get a hole of a one syllable word, I really use it.
I'll throw the call in for the moment Maxi.
I'll see you later darling, but right now I might as well get this over with.
Ladies and gentlemen, as much as I hate to admit it,
one of the most beautiful and talented song stylists who will sing
For Every Man There's a Woman, Miss Julie Wilson,
accompanied by Meredith Wilson and his...
Judith?
Julie Wilson and my...oh.
Oh that's how she got on this show.
Thanks, sister, thanks.
For Every Man There's a Woman
For Every Life There's a Plan
For Every Man There's a Woman
For Every Life There's a Plan
And wise men know it was ever so
Since the world began
Woman was made for man
Where is he? Where is he?
Love for me
For every prince there's a princess
For every jow there's a jow
And if you wait you will meet the maid
Who'll run for you alone
Happy to be your own
Where is he? Where is he?
Love for me
Find the one, find the one
Then together you will find the sun
For every heart there's a moment
For every hand a glove
And for every woman a man's love
Find the one, find the one
Then together you will find the sun
For every heart there's a moment
For every hand a glove
And for every woman a man's love
Where is he? Where can my lover
be?
Well, Julie, that was a beautiful song
and you sang it beautifully
and you must come and see us again some year.
Now, ladies and gentlemen.
Oh, just a minute, Tallulah.
If you don't mind, I have a date with somebody
and I'd like to wait until he's finished with his part of the show.
Well, darling, why don't you go home
and I'll have him telephone you after the show.
Which one is it?
Rudy Vallee.
All right, I'll have him megaphone you.
Now, why don't you get into the rest of that dress
and go on home, darling.
There's only room on this show for one glamorous woman.
Yes, I know. So I'll wait.
Now, look, Julie, it is quite obvious
that the only reason you're on this show
is because you happen to be related to Meredith Wilson.
But we're not related.
Meredith spells Wilson with two Ls.
I spell my name with one L.
Well, you got the L out of that once.
Why don't you do it again?
I've been looking for you, Miss Wilson.
I hope I haven't kept you waiting.
Oh, Rudy Vallee.
Oh, Rudy, it's so nice to see you again, darling.
Excuse me, madam. Miss Wilson.
As per our telephone conversation,
Saturday, January 27th, when I called you
person to person, evening rave,
from the Sheraton Biltmore Hotel in Providence, Rhode Island,
where I'm currently appearing,
this is to confirm our dinner engagement for this evening.
New paragraph.
May I recommend several restaurants
for your consideration?
The Hollywood Brown Derby,
the McFadden-Doleville, Miami Beach,
or if you prefer some place closer, Childs.
Charge of one, no substitution.
Childs. Why Childs?
Why not Childs?
I've been eating in Childs for a long time.
I'm a man of habit.
When I find something that pleases me, I stick with it.
I've been with the same barbers for 15 years.
I've been with the same tailor for 21 years.
As far as restaurants go, for the past 18 years,
I've been with Childs.
Congratulations.
Have a cigar.
Well, all right, Rudy.
Any place you say is all right with me.
Obviously.
Look, sporty.
What happened to that dinner engagement we had for tonight?
We had no dinner engagement, Miss Bankhead.
Well, obviously you didn't read your contract.
If you will hold your contract up
back at Claw's seven.
I never see the contracts. My lawyers take care of that.
Applebee, Cranshaw, Bates, and Walsh.
If you care to have dinner with them, you...
Charge of one again, huh?
What's the matter, Tallulah?
This guy making trouble for you?
We had a dinner engagement, Massey.
Now he's suddenly decided to take out Julie.
Oh, yeah? Listen, you can't do that to Tallulah.
I'll tear you apart. I'll beat the brains out.
If I had any.
I'll tear you to pieces and don't think I can't do it.
Stop shaking your fist at me.
I didn't do anything. It's Rudy Valley.
Oh, excuse me.
I'm the culprit.
What?
Culprit, that's what.
And I'd advise you not to engage in fisticuffs.
While in college, I was boxing champion of the campus.
Yeah, I've been on the campus myself.
But if you're gonna break the thing with Tallulah,
you gotta fight me.
That a boy, champ.
Isn't this wonderful two men fighting over me?
I warn you, sir, if you insist upon this vulgar display of brute strength,
I shall defend myself to the last ditch.
I shall give two for every one I receive.
I shall fight valiantly without compassion.
Even though I shall be destroyed and drowned to ashes like Phoenix,
I shall arise from these ashes for all to see the truth,
so crushed to earth will rise again.
Hey, what are you doing?
Fighting me or acting me?
That's telling him, champ.
Now let's get the fight started.
We shall fight Marcus of Queensbury.
Two of us against one day?
Eh, that sounds fair.
Very well, here we go. Defend yourself.
Don't worry about me. I'll take care of myself.
You just take care of yourself.
I can take care of myself.
Well, I can take care of myself.
I can take care of myself as well as you can take care of yourself.
Well, just so you'll take care of yourself.
I'll take care of myself.
Okay, take care of yourself. I'll be seeing you.
Look, Dove. Feel, Dove.
And that certainly was the jolly fight I ever saw.
I'm sorry I lost my temper, Tallulah.
When aroused, I'm like some magnificent savage jungle beast.
Well, music has charms, they say.
So how about soothing yourself with some music, darling?
Yes, I'd like to sing a song with lyrics by Milton Berle.
You took me out of this world when you took me in your arms.
Well, soothe yourself.
You took me out of this world when you came into my heart.
You took me out of this world into a world of ours
where every dream we share has a way of coming true.
But darling, this couldn't be had it not been for you.
You took me up on a cloud where I could touch every star.
You took me out of the cloud in the sand without
I'm feeding off the land of love that's bounded by your charm.
You took me out of this world when you took me in your arms.
I'm feeding off the land of love that's bounded by your charm.
You took me out of this world when you took me in your arms.
Rudy darling, you certainly stirred up fond memories.
I was listening to that beautiful familiar voice of yours.
Now, Tallulah, I'll take it from anybody else.
But don't tell me that you heard me sing as a little girl.
Oh, did you sing as a little girl, darling?
Oh, well you must tell me about that sometime.
But you know what I was thinking as I listened to you sing just now?
I was thinking this is the man who practically started radio.
That's strange. I was thinking this is the woman who's finishing it off.
Being the actress I am, I continue quite carefully.
Rudy, I was thinking of those days in radio when everything was new and exciting
and how you played such a big part in making it so.
You don't know it, darling, but I was really one of your most ardent fans.
When you left radio and the time was on, everything seemed to have gone flat.
I miss them all cheering and saying,
My time is your time. Your time is my time.
Yes, time has certainly gone flat.
I don't think I missed a single program you ever did, Rudy.
Thank you, and I don't think I missed a single play you ever did, Tallulah.
And I followed your career avidly for years.
Thank you, and I followed your career avidly for years.
And here you are today, just as youthful and handsome as ever.
Thank you, and I don't think I missed a single play you ever did.
Oh, Silk Valley, why don't you get lost?
Go on television, for instance.
As a matter of fact, I've been thinking that television might be pretty good for my talent.
Yes, I suppose so, if your talent happens to be wrestling.
All I've ever seen on television is wrestling and more wrestling.
Now, that's not fitter, at least not the theater I knew when I first came to New York.
Darling, darling, did I ever tell you about the first day I came to New York to go on the stage?
Yes.
It was a warm summer day. I remember it was a Monday.
I decided I was going to conquer Broadway if it took me the whole day.
I was 16 years old, darling. And that was the very first year I was 16.
Oh, what a lovely age, 16 years. There I was, fresh from a little town in Alabama
and really pretty nervous about the whole thing.
Well, I walked into the producer's office and was stopped cold by his secretary.
Hello, sugar. I'd like to see Mr. Bradley.
You know, just a friendly visit. And then, sugar, he was busy today auditioning for a play.
Who else would I have to tell you?
You know what, sugar? While I'm here being friendly, I might as well audition to play myself.
Tomorrow? Well, why don't I come back tomorrow?
No, I haven't got a sore throat today.
Now, you just tell Mr. Bradley I'm here, will you, sugar?
My name? Tudu the Bankhead.
What do you mean, is that the best I can make up?
Now, look here. Down where I come from, the name Bankhead is respected and revered.
While we Bankheads fought in the war between the states,
the history of the South is filled with the deeds of the Bankhead.
But, yes, I know the war is over, but you don't have to take it out on me just because we won.
And don't think you can just sit there and talk to me just because you keep calling me darling.
Oh, you do? To everybody? Well, now that sounds real nice.
It's a fuddy, ain't it?
Now, you just tell Mr. Bradley I'm here. Now, you just tell him sugar is here.
He'll remember. No, not Miss Sugar.
Honestly, you northerners, too, who talk crazy.
Now, you just pick up that phone, honey, and you just tell him I want to see him.
And no, I did not say I fought in the Civil War.
It was the war between the states. And I did not fight in that fight either.
Now, don't you freak talk to me with that darling.
I'm going in there myself, and don't you try and stop me, darling.
Darling, that I never hurt so many darlings that sit in the north and curse me.
Why, hello, Mr. Bradley, darling.
Well, I told you you'd remember me, darling.
Don't you remember you were in Alabama, Montgomery, darling?
I came backstage to see you and we talked about my going to the theater,
and you're the beautiful South and Robert E. Lee.
No, I am not Robert Montgomery.
Well, darling, I just thought I'd drop in and audition for your play, sugar.
I mean, darling, experience.
What do you mean by that crap?
Oh, have I been on stage before?
Well, not exactly on the stage, darling.
I'm quite active in the little place you put on for charity down south.
Well, I've always been in charge of selling tickets in the boos.
Well, I've always wanted to be in the place,
but the girl said I made such a nice appearance in the boos.
No, I did not say that I appeared with boobs.
Now, you don't care, Mr. Bradley.
Now, listen, honey, I think it'd be real cozy if you took a personal interest in middle-old me.
Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
Oh, I'm just kidding.
I just think you're just a man to please, Mr. Bradley.
I know, Mr. Bradley, you misunderstood.
Mr. Bradley.
You're hurting my arms.
Oh, now let go.
Now, one of us is gonna get hurt.
Now, Mr. Bradley, I'm warning you.
Take your sweaty paws off me.
Oh, I'm sorry, Mr. Bradley, did I hurt you, darling?
Well, no, I would not be interested in making it too far out of frame.
Well, Kahlula.
Yes, darling?
I see you're still wrestling with show business.
Arre, bolga, my darling.
Ladies and gentlemen, you are now in for a real treat.
Here beside me now is Broadway's most sensational dancing comedian.
Over the past three years, he's danced,
done and clowned his way into the hearts of every New Yorker who has seen Square Charlie.
Opening again at the Broadway Theater.
Fifty-third and Broadway.
Tomorrow night to 29th of January.
And I personally am buying 50 tickets for the opening.
Then I personally am getting in on the part.
After commercial like that, I should.
You can be my guest, Kahlula.
Thanks for the use of your microphone to plug where's Charlie.
And good night, darling.
Oh, no, you don't, Ray.
Now, you're not getting off that easily.
We have a lot for you to do on the show,
but the first thing I want you to do is that wonderful song Amy.
Will you ask the audience to sing along with you?
Well, I never ask the audience to sing.
You see, they love Amy as much as I do.
That's why they sing.
Do you think your audience will sing along with me?
Oh, will they sing?
They've been listening to me sing for 12 weeks.
They're dying to get back at me.
Ladies and gentlemen, the one and only Ray Bowser
and once in love with Amy.
Once in love with Amy, always in love with Amy.
Fascinated by her, set your heart on fire, she said.
Once you kissed my aim, tear up your lips, he said.
Fly her with bonbons, poetry, and flowers.
Moon a million hours away.
You might be quite the pickle-hearted rover.
So came Pink and Boat, who loved the girl and later
think they're all over, then just quit.
Come on, I want you out with Amy.
Always in love with Amy.
And ever sweetly romantic, trouble is the answer will be.
Amy'd rather stay in love with me.
Oh, I want you out with Amy.
Oh, I'm so happy.
I want everybody to sing with me.
Meredith, once you're kissed by Amy, tear up your lips,
says Amy.
Fly her with bonbons, poetry, and flowers.
Moon a million hours away.
Once you're kissed by Amy, tear up your lips,
says Amy.
Fly her with bonbons, poetry, and flowers.
Moon a million hours away.
You might be quite the pickle-hearted rover.
So came Pink and Boat.
Who loved the girl and later think they're all over,
then just quit.
Come on, everybody sing.
Once in love with Amy.
Always in love with Amy.
Ever and ever sweetly you'll romance her.
Sweetly you'll romance her.
Trouble is the answer will be.
Ha ha ha ha.
He's had it out of say.
In love with me.
Ha ha ha ha.
Ring ding dong dong, my little heart goes boom when I hear this melody play.
Ring ding dong dong, a little tip of tune, who cares what the words may be saying.
Ring ding dong dong, you'll hear it once and soon, you'll find that your heart begins to fling.
It's more than a wall, more after it holds, it lingers with you night and day.
And this song it might just come on, you'll find, ding ding and zoom zoom away.
Ding ding ding, zoom zoom zoom, ding ding ding, zoom zoom, we'll sing, we'll zoom, we'll fill the room with the
ding ding and a zoom zoom and a sing hum and a song.
Ding ding ding, zoom zoom, my little heart goes boom when I hear this melody play.
Ding ding ding, zoom zoom, ding ding ding, you'll hear what the words may be saying.
Ding ding dong dong, you'll hear it once and soon, you'll find that your heart begins to fling.
And ladies you can get home and you can go to your master for a little dance.
And this song it might just come on, you'll find that this thing has some grossly joy.
That was Meredith Wilson and his orchestra, and we'll be back in a moment just as soon as I ring my time.
This is NBC, the National Broadcasting Company.
The big show. This is the National Broadcasting Company Sunday Extravaganza with the most intimidating personalities in show business.
The big show. The Sunday night feature of NBC's All Star Festival is brought to you by RCA Victor, world leader in radio,
first in recorded music, first in television, and by the makers of Anison for fast relief from the pain of headaches,
urethanas, and uralgia. The big stars of this program are Ray Bolger, Gary Cooper, Danny Kaye, the Delta Rhythm Boys,
Maxi Rosenblum, Rudy Valli, Julie Wilson, Meredith Wilson, and the big show orchestra and chorus.
And every week, your hostess, the glamorous, unpredictable, Deluna Bankhead.
Well, darling, I want to say a first thank you for the wonderful thousands of letters you've been writing.
I thank you, and especially my maid thank you, because of the wonderful mail you've been sending,
she doesn't have to write all those fan letters to me anymore. Well, in recent weeks, the mail has been particularly big,
but NBC has never let me see any of it, so I sent them a very short note saying that I'd like to see some of that big mail.
Well, this week, they sent me some of the biggest mail you ever saw.
Gary Cooper, Maxi Rosenblum, Rudy Valli, Ray Bolger, the Delta Rhythm Boys, and Danny Kaye.
I mention Danny Kaye last because I want to introduce him first. Danny Kaye!
Well, Danny, darling, let's get it over with. I suppose you come on the show to plug something you're going to do,
a picture, a show, whatever it is. Let's get it over with right away.
Oh, no, no, no, not me, Deluna. I'm not plugging anything. I'm here on a two-week quiet vacation.
Oh, no, darling, that's nice of you, but where are you spending your quiet vacation in New York?
On the stage of the Roxy Theatre, four shows a day, starting this Wednesday.
My pretty country around the Roxy. And I'm sure things will be very quiet while you're there.
Well, if they're not, I can always come here and sleep Sunday nights.
Dear Lord, have mercy, please.
You know, your audience here is so well-behaved, Toulouse. At the Roxy, you know, they keep moving around all the time.
Kids wandering up and down the aisle are always...
I asked one of those little kids one day, I said, Hey, Sonny, where are you going?
Never mind where the kid was going.
And he told me.
Ah, you're at the living, Danny. Now, where are you going after you finish at that...
Club, dear, dear. I'm going back to England.
London, Danny.
Naturally.
But I shan't be able to go until my New York tailor finishes some suits for me, you see.
Do you have an appointment with my tailor in London before I open at the playroom over there?
But I don't understand, Danny. Why do you have a suit made here?
You haven't made an eno's, my dear.
Good heavens, are you serious?
I say, that's rather ridiculous at the moment.
I couldn't possibly walk into my tailor's in London looking as though I needed a new suit.
I know exactly what you mean, darling.
It's a matter of, I always clean my apartment before the maid comes in to clean up.
Oh, that's a frightfully good witticism.
You see, this is rather jolly stout girls.
Watch it, Butcher.
Well, I'm terribly sorry, old girl.
And watch that too.
I beg your pardon, so sorry, old boy.
Lost my head, you know, carried away and all that sort of thing.
Deeply sorry. I'm very desperately sorry. Carry on, my dear.
No, thank you. Now, Danny, tell me.
I say, oh, oh, oh, oh.
Oh, oh, sorry. I had a little left early, you know.
Sense of humor always gets the best of me. What?
Yeah, Danny, that's a wonderful image, actually.
Especially good for a boy who was born and raised right here in New York.
Watch your language, cute thing.
Why are you in New York? It's Brooklyn.
Oh, you come from Brooklyn?
Well, I come from Brooklyn, born on the corner of Abraham and Seville.
Do you know Brooklyn?
Bushwicky Avenue?
DeKalb Avenue?
Brighton Beach?
You ever been to Brooklyn?
Well, I've been thinking of getting up a safari any day now.
What kind of safari?
Why don't you take a subway?
I would rather drive.
What kind of drive?
You take the IRT or the BMC?
I'd rather take DTG.
Oh, a wise guy, huh?
So don't come to Brooklyn, who needs you?
We got ever steal home of the Dodgers
where Bankhead is the name of a pitcher.
All right, Danny, let's get out of Brooklyn
and back to the Dodge.
Ha ha ha ha ha.
Flip that in.
While you were in England, did you stay in London
or did you visit the continent too?
Oh, je les parle en sauteur, les plaies en fleurs.
Oh, how nice.
Did you visit Spain?
No, no, no, no, that is not Spain.
It is La Belle France, Paris, Guy Paris.
I've met so many of my French friends
who I have known for love for so many years.
Jean Sablon, Jean Gabin, Georges Carpentier,
Lucien Boyet, Charles Trenet, and Sugar Ray Robinson.
And my very good friend, Maurice Chevalier.
Oh, yes, yes, Maurice.
How is Maurice?
Keeping us kiffed for lower lifts, I suppose.
Oh, he's doing very well.
I hear from him quite often.
He sends me long letters in French.
I would be much happier with a postcard.
But while I was there, I sang for him a song,
a song called Enver Rubiere,
which is from my new 20th Century Fox,
technical, a picture of the same name.
Look.
But I would like to sing it for you.
May I?
Eh, oui.
No, no, I will sing it myself.
I have heard you sing before, Monsieur.
Eh, eh.
Oh, it's good.
Chef d'orchestre, donnez-moi un downbeat, Sylvia, please.
If you look, you see the people from Paris playing on the Riviera.
When there's ice and snow, it's nice to need to go where the moon, clair de lune, is clearer.
All the girls are gay, and they parle français anytime, anyplace, anyway.
If you want another kiss, but you don't think that you should on the Riviera, oh, you would.
If you're just out to bust out and see what life can give the place to live, here's the Riviera.
You know, I remember when I was a little boy, my father always told me the best place to go.
Riviera.
Yes.
Well, I remember I was no more than five years old, and he said to me, really, André,
one time we all the girls are gay, and they parle français anytime, anyplace, anyway.
If today you have a million and tomorrow you broke on the Riviera, oh, did you?
If you're just out to bust out and see what life can give the place to live, here's the Riviera.
Riviera, Riviera, Riviera, Riviera, Riviera, here's the Riviera.
Here's a word from RCA Victor.
For you people who are buying television now,
that word is combination.
Yes, an RCA Victor combination,
which brings you AM and FM radio,
recorded music in all three speeds,
and famous RCA Victor million proof television.
Now you can have all these in one beautiful cabinet
for one beautiful price.
Ask your RCA Victor dealer to introduce you
to the kingly RCA Victor combination, the Rutland.
With its doors closed,
the Rutland looks like a furniture masterpiece,
straight out of the 18th century.
With its doors open, it is like an electronic masterpiece,
straight out of the 21st century.
So superb are its RCA Victor features.
AM and FM radio, two automatic record changers,
play all record speeds,
and exciting RCA Victor million proof television,
proved in well over a million American homes.
Yet all these great instruments combined
actually cost you much less
than comparable console instruments would cost separately.
Yes, with an RCA Victor Rutland, wonders never cease.
But go on, pouring out show after show, record after record,
not just for one person, but for the whole family.
["The Star-Spangled Banner"]
It is now time, darling, for us to pay our respects
to that very tall, very handsome,
very distinguished caller from the West,
Mr. Gary Cooper.
["The Star-Spangled Banner"]
Gary and I are privileged to play for you tonight
on the big show,
some scenes from an enduring American classic,
Ernest Hemingway's famed novel,
Farewell to Arms.
["Farewell to Arms"]
Farewell to Arms is the story of another time,
of another world conflagration,
of two people who meet, who love,
and who lose their war.
This is the story of Frederick Henry,
an American ambulance driver attached to the Italian army,
and Catherine Barkley, an English nurse.
Our story opens in a place where it ends,
a cafe,
Lausanne, Switzerland,
fall,
1918.
["Farewell to Arms"]
Yes.
Monsieur, you think he would have the Italian wine?
Huh?
Yes, yes.
Chianti, all we have, but a good vintage, Monsieur.
Just leave it.
Yes.
You are very wet.
Shall I hang up your coat?
No.
Perhaps a little cheese with the wine?
No, nothing.
An unseasonable storm,
but the rain will surely turn to snow.
What do you think to hear thunder this late in the season?
Thunder?
I thought it was gunfire.
Oh, well, Monsieur knows.
Monsieur was in the war, perhaps?
Yes, Monsieur was in the war.
One hears much talk, one almost dares to believe,
this time that there might be peace.
Have you more of this Chianti?
Oh, yes.
Good.
Monsieur, forgive me,
but the dear one, the hospital, the food-wise,
the babies, they are where?
Dead.
Both dead.
All dead.
Oh, oh, Monsieur.
Monsieur, but what is there to say?
Just go away.
Watch the wine.
When it's gone, bring more.
There was thunder the night I met Catherine.
Very seasonable thunder of guns up at the mountains
where the Austrians were.
It would really be quite romantic, this old garden,
new moon shining, but the guns, the guns.
They're not bad when you get used to them.
You know, I think it's quite odd,
you own a medicine in the Italian Army.
Well, it's not really the Army, it's only the Ambulance Corps.
I think it's odd.
There's no odder than me finding you here, a British,
a beautiful English girl, posing as a nurse.
Little rough, but just as cold.
I guess it is at that.
Well, I shouldn't be sitting out here with you.
I'd better be getting back to the hospital.
The head nurse will be looking for me.
Don't go.
There might be an offensive start at any moment,
then I'd have to go.
I might never see you again.
Oh, well, I'll stay a little while longer.
You really are quite close to the front, aren't you?
Yes.
Do you suppose this war will go on our way?
No.
What's the stoppage?
It'll crack somewhere.
I wonder what peace will be like.
It could be you, me, but let's drop the lure.
Oh, that'll be very hard.
There's no place to drop it.
Well, let's drop it anyway.
All right.
No, please don't do that.
Don't.
I only want to kiss you.
I apologize, Miss Sparkley.
I'm so sorry, really.
I thought I had a certain thought.
Well, you were quite right, Nurse Sparkley.
But you are very beautiful, and I am only lonely.
You don't need to say that of nonsense.
I said I was sorry.
Well, I'm not.
I enjoyed kissing you.
Well, we do get along.
We have got away from the war.
You are sweet.
No, I'm not.
Yes, you are.
You're dear.
I, I, I'd be glad to kiss you, if you don't mind.
Yes, ma'am.
Oh, Catherine.
Oh, my dear.
I don't think I can bear to let you go now.
Oh, me.
Oh, my darling.
Oh, my darling, I was afraid of you.
Yes.
You know?
Yes.
You know, it doesn't really take time.
That's a moment.
A moment.
It's as big as an eternity.
Yes.
Oh, darling, you will be good to me, won't you?
Mm-hmm.
You will, won't you?
Because we're going to have a strange life.
A very strange life.
You were right, Catherine.
It was strange and wonderful and terrible, too.
Wars have a way of getting out of hand.
Our quiet, nice, orderly little war was in the mountains,
blew up in our faces.
Suddenly, there was a lot of movement, a lot of tension.
And we were ordered up.
I knew something big was simmering,
and I couldn't go without seeing Catherine.
I had that last-time feeling.
Miss Barkley, please.
Oh, don't bother.
Thank you.
There she is.
Miss Barkley.
Barry, what's the matter?
What is it?
I had to see you.
My driver's waiting outside.
Something is brewing up in the hills, something big.
We've heard nothing but rumors all day.
This is no place to say what I want to say, Catherine.
I know, darling, I know.
But we'll be back tomorrow night.
Sure.
Here, darling, I have something for you.
It's a Saint Anthony.
You're not a Catholic, are you?
No, but they say that a Saint Anthony is very useful.
Well, I'll take care of him for you.
Catherine, isn't there some place, any place at all,
except that it's busy for you?
Well, there's a balcony there outside the windows,
but it's raining so hard.
We won't melt.
Come on.
Well?
Oh, darling.
I don't know where this little adventure up there
is going to finish, Catherine.
If things get unstuck, where will I find you?
Milan.
Let's talk removing us to Milan, Frederick.
Nothing's going to happen.
It won't.
Nothing must happen to you.
It won't.
Come on.
Let's drop the war.
Right.
It's dark.
Look at it rain.
Yeah.
And you'll always love me, won't you?
Of course.
And the rain won't make any difference.
No.
That's because I'm afraid of the rain.
Why?
I've always been afraid of the rain.
Nonsense.
It's part of the war.
I like walking in it.
But it's hard to make love in the rain.
Oh, no, no.
Not if you try real hard, Catherine.
I'll love you always.
In the rain, the snow, the hail.
Always.
And I'll love you no matter how it is.
You're really not afraid of the rain, are you?
Not when I'm with you.
Why are you afraid of it?
I don't know.
Come on.
Tell me.
All right.
I'm afraid of the rain because sometimes I see you dead in it.
No.
And sometimes I see you dead in it.
So that's more likely.
But I'm not afraid of the rain.
I'm not.
Oh, I wish I were.
That's it.
My boys want to move along.
Sit up, Catherine.
Remember, I have St. Anthony to see me through.
And don't forget, if anything does go badly,
I'll see you in the land.
Yes, my darling.
I'll be waiting in the land.
You were saying, Monsieur?
What?
What was I saying?
It sounded like Caporetto.
Did it?
The wine is gone.
I thought more.
There you are.
Says nothing.
No.
No Nothing.
Even nothing.
It's 47 degrees along the coast.
Or even more below the 우리�ines.
Not even over the
Caporetto but another retreat.
Scared men cursing, wounded men screaming,
dead men getting in the way.
Something went bad all right.
It was very bad at Caporetto.
Catherine, I'll never know exactly
how I got through to you in Midland,
but this much I knew, for you and me the war was over.
It was time for us to bid farewell to arms.
Frederick, oh my darling.
You haven't much time, Catherine.
Oh, thank God you're alive.
Oh, Frederick, let me look at you, darling.
Oh, you do look badly.
You're not wearing a uniform.
No.
But if they catch you.
They won't.
You don't expect us to go on with the war
after the letter you wrote me.
Oh, oh.
Are you unhappy?
Are you angry with me?
Angry?
I'm going to be the proudest father in the world.
I wouldn't mind going it alone.
I'll get along somehow.
For you, darling.
No, you won't.
You'll never walk alone again.
But they'll be looking for you, won't they?
I mean, won't they arrest you?
No, they'll probably shoot me.
Then we'll not stay here.
We'll get out of the country.
Yes, Switzerland is down the lake.
We're going there.
That'll be lovely.
They don't appreciate what a fine watch you have.
I don't care.
I'll get you some place where they can't arrest you
and then we'll have another trip.
They're here. They're here.
No, no, that's Emilio.
He's going to row us across the lake.
And it's Tom?
Will you take a chance?
Of course.
I'm ready if you are.
Well, let's go.
Everything is going to be all right.
We, Henrys, are going to sign their own treaty of peace.
Monsieur Henrys, please.
I do not wish to impose the details of me inside
to have to watch you.
Just sitting there hour after hour,
drinking and feeling nothing of the wine.
Please.
You said the wife and the child.
Please, it is not good to sit alone like this.
Perhaps if you would talk, please,
if you would confide in me.
It was raining like this when I got her to the hospital.
It rained all day, all night.
And it rained when the baby was born, when it died.
And it rained hour after hour as I waited for them
to let me into her.
It rained as I did the first time she told me
that she saw death in the rain.
And it rained as I stood by the bed
and held her hand in my hand.
And it rained as I stood by the bed and held her hand in my hand.
Poor darling.
You're all right, Catherine.
You're going to be all right.
The baby.
The baby's gone.
Can he?
Yes, Catherine.
But you're going to be all right.
I'm going to die.
I hate it.
You're going to be all right.
I knew it.
I meant to write you a letter to have it been me.
But I didn't do it.
He wasn't, he wasn't talking so much.
Oh, I'm, I'm not afraid.
I, I just hate it so.
Please, darling.
All right, all right.
Just hold my hand.
You, you won't feel the same way about none.
You won't say the same thing to her.
Never.
I want you to have girls, though.
I don't want them.
Don't be lonely.
I'll come.
I'll, I'll be with you tonight.
Don't stop it, darling.
Don't cry.
You mustn't cry.
I'm not afraid.
I said you're not a kid.
Catherine.
Hello, Catherine.
We will share this new bottle of wine, monsieur.
Yes.
Good.
What has happened?
Hmm, happened.
Oh, did the storm pass over?
I mean, the bell.
Oh, that, that's the church bell.
They're ringing it because it's come.
What?
Peace, monsieur.
Peace?
No.
For me, there is no peace.
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Oh, Gary, Gary Cooper, darling, come over here.
You're so divine, darling.
I'd like to talk to you a little.
But before you do, Tallulah, I want to say that this portion of the program is brought to you by
RCA Victor, world leader in radio, first in recorded music, first in television, and by the
makers of Anisyn for fast relief from pain of headaches, neuritis, and neuralgia.
And now it's time for you to ring your chime.
That's right, Ed, darling.
We'll have our little chat in a moment, Gary.
And after that, Danny Kaye has a surprise for the audience.
Now I'd like to ring my chime, darling.
This is NBC, the national broadcasting company.
This is the big show where Tallulah Bankhead is about to have a cozy chat with Gary Cooper.
Gary, Gary, darling, I want to congratulate you on your touching, moving, dramatic performance
in Farewell's Arms a few moments ago.
You know, people forget that you have appeared in a great variety of motion pictures and think of
you only as these thoughtful and slow-talking westerners.
Well, you're not that way at all, are you, Gary?
Nope.
Of course not, darling, but that's Hollywood.
You know, once you've played one part, that's the only part they think you can play.
Now, now, for the sake of me, now since my first play, I've been typed as a high-spun,
temperamental, excitable woman who screams at people at the top of her voice and can only
say the most cutting, devastating things, but everyone knows I'm not that type at all.
Why, I can be as sweet and gentle and lovable as June Allison.
Don't you think so, Gary, darling?
Yep.
Well, darling, I hate to rush you, but I think it would expedite matters a little if instead of
saying, yep, nope, you just nodded your head. Could you do that, darling?
Oh, Kaluna.
Yes, my boo, yeah?
After watching you and Gary in that dramatic sketch, I got to thinking.
That looks like a pretty easy work compared to what I do, dancing all the time, and I
think there ought to be a place for me as a dramatic actor.
Some people say I ought to stick to my dancing. You don't think so, do you?
Yep.
Wait a minute, Gary, what do you mean, yep?
Well, that yep was just answering that question that Kaluna asked me, if I could nod my head.
Oh, I'm terribly sorry, Gary, darling. What was the answer?
Yep.
Now I've forgotten what the question was.
What do you think, Kaluna? Do you think I'll have to go on dancing for the rest of my life?
I'm getting sick of dancing all the time, coming home with my feet calloused and blistered.
I'm like a chain, like sitting in a saddle. The question was, could I nod my head?
No, yes, Gary, I remember now, but tell me, darling, what do you think about Ray? Do you
think he could play a cowboy? Do you, darling, think he could play a cowboy?
Maybe.
Well, at least he didn't say no, Ray. That's encouraging, isn't it, darling?
Yep.
I could be rereading Gone with the Wind. Now tell me, Ray, have you had any experience playing
western pop?
Well, I could learn. All it takes is...time.
Yeah, you should have learned it right there. Have you ever ridden a horse, a rope this
here, or broken a bronc?
Oh, I used to ride all the time down in South America.
Really? What country down there?
Down in...
Argentina.
Argentina?
It all sounds very easy to me. It sounds as if you're just both taking a lot of time.
How much time can you take, Ray?
Oh, I can take as much time as the next fella.
Hello, Ray.
Yep.
This must be what they mean by the wide open fizzies.
Oh, saluda.
Oh, yeah, do it about it.
May I pause here a moment?
Yep.
Hi-ho, everybody. Hi, Gary. Ho, Ray.
Hi.
Here we go again.
Hello, fellas. Hi, Gary. Ray. Rudy.
Hi.
A cup goes with that one.
Well, what's going on here, saluda?
What's going on here, saluda?
That was his line.
Nothin'.
Somebody forgot a yuck.
What's going on here, saluda?
Why, nothin', honey-chai. I'm on a jawn. It's Maxie, Road and Blue.
Yeah. Hi, Gary. Ray. Rudy. Danny.
Hi.
See you guys take a long count.
Oh, this has got to stop someplace. I wonder if the audience is still with us.
Are you still with us, darlings?
Yeah.
Wow.
You did the time it very well, darlings.
Well, thanks for that.
Well, now that I've got you all together, which one of you strong pilot men is taking me to dinner tonight?
The next act, ladies and gentlemen, the famous Delta Rhythm Boys singing one of their great record hits, the song they made famous, Dry Bones.
Are you ready, darlings?
Yup.
Dry Bones.
Black bone your backbone connected to you.
Shoulder bone your shoulder bone connected to you.
Neck bone you neck bone connected to you.
Head bone I hear the word of the Lord.
Our limb bones limb bones gonna walk around our limb bones limb bones gonna
Walk around our limb bones limb bones gonna
And I'll see you soon...
...with a new song.
That was wonderful, boy!
How'd you like that, Gary?
Very good, aren't they, darling?
Yep.
Danny K.,
while we were waiting
for Gary Cooper's answer,
we had a wonderful
little show
with a very good
very good
performance.
While we were waiting for Gary Cooper's answer,
would you sing for us now?
I'll be glad to.
That's a wonderful song from one of your pictures. I'd love to hear it.
I'll be glad to.
It's the only thing I'll ever ask of you, darling.
Please sing that song for me.
I'll be glad to.
This woman only listens when she's talking.
After all we got you on this program
here you sing. Why won't you?
I know this line backwards now.
Too glad, B.I.L.
Well, I'll just never forget tonight
I went to see you in that picture, Danny.
How that audience
were proud of that song.
Now if you sing it on this show, it'll be just
what we need at this point.
Look, no script. I'll be glad to.
Oh, Danny, I'm going to tell you what happened
the night I went to the movie theater
to see your picture.
I'll be glad to.
Well, Danny, darling, you know, there was a double feature that night
and I came in during the other picture.
Well, I don't know whether that other picture was an A picture
or a B picture,
but I'm sure if the Phoenicians had seen it
they would have invented a new letter.
Well, I got so mad
it would have been such a waste of time, darling.
I was just burning up in some
caloesha.
Came over to me and said, no
smoking.
Well, I could have just kicked.
Only I couldn't find my shoes.
So I said to him,
why don't you beat it? So he said to me,
madam, you're attracting attention.
And I said, well, that's
more than that picture up there is doing.
So he called the manager.
Only I knew he wasn't really the manager
because he wasn't wearing a tuxedo.
And this over-eager
underling had me
appr-us-tory
to say to me that he would have me
ejected from the theater.
Eject me from the theater.
Yes.
You can imagine
what I had called the manager.
So Danny, darling, would you sing
the song for me now? I never got to
see the picture.
I've been trying to sing it for five minutes.
Oh, you did?
Oh, well, thank you, darling.
You were just lovely listening to it.
But I didn't sing it yet.
Oh, dear.
Oh, you didn't?
Well, sing it now, darling.
You're waiting.
This boy is so confused.
What you have to go through on this program
is sing one little song.
We had a song we did in the picture called
Inspector General, and it's rather an unusual
story. This one's the story of an unsuccessful
gypsy. And in the picture,
I play the part of the unsuccessful-
unsuccessful-
That's hard to say, you know?
I play the gypsy who is
unemployed.
Whisking through the whispering woods
in a wild romany pony, with a
yack-yack-yack and a yack-a-drock and a yack-a-drock to donate.
I'm the gypsy, the gypsy,
the gypsy,
the gypsy, the gypsy,
the gypsy, the gypsy, the gypsy, the gypsy, the gypsy.
The world thinks
him tipsy and careless
and free,
but oh, the poor gypsy,
his lot is not
what it ought to be for.
Night and day and day
and night, there's a man there sick of obeying
with a whip
in his hand.
Oh, the gypsy he stands
and this is what
he is saying.
Hum, hum, hum.
Play gypsy
sing, gypsy dance,
gypsy laugh, gypsy cry,
gypsy live, gypsy die, gypsy drink.
Gypsy
drink to goodbyes
and drink to hellos, drink to
the open, drink to the close.
Drink to me only
with thine eyes and I will
drink with my nose.
And so
we dance. But first
we sing. Oh, I
forgot, ladies and gentlemen, how can you sing a gypsy song
without a gypsy chorus that has never been
done before in the history of gypsies.
I would like to ask you all to do me a favor.
Instead of you being the audience this evening,
I would like you to be for me
gypsies.
So it's very simple really.
We divide the theater into three grouts.
One, two,
three. Now the first grout from here over.
You see, when I make a beat you sing for me like this.
Zoom.
Everybody with me, please.
Wow.
Three gypsies.
Everybody
put an earring in your ear and make me a nice zoom.
Everybody with me, please.
Ah.
The center section here up and down.
When I make a beat you sing for me like this.
Stock stock.
Everybody with me.
Stock stock.
Very nice.
Stock stock.
This grout here, when I make a beat you sing for me like this.
Ha ha ha.
Not yet, I will give you.
Everybody with me.
Ha ha ha.
Thank you, Adam.
Let me hear the stock stock.
Stock stock.
Ha ha ha.
You see who zooms you.
One big zoom.
Everybody, please.
Now we sing gypsy songs.
Alright.
Ah.
The tremor's an o.
O.
Isn't that beautiful.
Now we go to the top of the class a little bit.
You see I will sing the tremor's a roach and you will sing zoom.
Zoom.
We do the notes a little bit, alright.
The tremor's an o.
O.
I like it, I like it.
I like it.
But what happens to the stock?
Stock stock.
Please don't disappoint me stocky.
Let me have two nice stocks please.
Stock stock.
I like it.
Stock stock.
Very strong.
Stock stock.
Very good.
Yeah, I'll be good.
I didn't make it.
I'll have to wait till I give you the beat.
Yeah, I'll be good.
You are late.
I'll be good.
Yeah, I'll be good.
With me?
Are you a zoom or a stock stock?
Yes, right now.
Now we all sing together.
We go.
Zoom stock stock.
Stock stock.
Stock stock is late.
Faster.
The winner!
That was wonderful fun Daddy.
What a great performance.
I enjoy it.
Thank you very much.
Watch your stubborn, Rosenblum.
I forgot the line.
Oh yeah.
What is it Maxie?
I hate to appear hereditary.
Oops.
Sit down.
Just for a minute.
I hate to appear hereditary.
Or subdued or
but I've got a feeling I've seen you
someplace.
Well, naturally darling, I've been the steeler for some time.
No, no, you look exactly like a guy
I fought in Milwaukee.
How did I do?
I was robbed.
You fight with all the likes.
When you lose your job, you're just a bum.
Please, don't say that.
I'm an artist.
Just like you are. You're the bum.
I'm sitting in the cinema.
You're the cinema bum.
I always say that when you see my new picture.
Skip along Rosenblum.
No Maxie, I'd like to see you in a fight with Joe Lewis.
You don't like me, huh Rudy?
I certainly do like you.
I'm willing to wage you that if you ever got in a ring with Joe Lewis, you could beat him.
I'll bet he can too. I'll bet a hundred dollars he can.
I'll bet a hundred dollars on Maxie. How about you, Salou?
No, not me.
Joe Lewis could knock him out over the telephone.
Not long distance.
I'll bet on Maxie.
How about you, Gary? You want to bet on him?
Oh, don't bother Gary Cooper, darling.
He's still working on that other question.
Well, we're all betting on Maxie.
Who are we going to get to cover the bet?
Don't go away, Gary.
I'll take the whole bet myself.
And now we're about to hear a special achievement arrangement
that only Meredith Wilson can whip it up.
The song, Yesterday.
And here is Meredith Wilson with the Big Show orchestra and chorus.
Meredith, darling, if you please.
For today I'm dreaming of my yesterday.
I'm dreaming of yesterday.
Meredith, that was as usual divine.
But I want to speak to you on a very, very important subject, darling.
Now you come here a minute. Meredith Wilson.
Yes, Miss Bankhead.
Now, Meredith, you're in charge of deciding who gets to sing the songs on this show.
Is that correct?
Well, sir, Miss Bankhead, I try to see that, you know, everybody who sings on the show gets a song to do.
Is that so?
Uh-huh.
Well, that's very interesting.
Now let me see. Rudy Ballet sang. Correct?
Correct.
Julie Wilson sang.
Correct.
Vin Ray Bosa sang.
Correct.
And Vigel who Rhythm Boys sang.
Correct.
And Danny K. sang twice.
And I see he has another song coming up. Right?
Correct.
So I'm going to sing my song right now. Correct?
I knew that check would bounce.
I think you've got a legitimate beat.
Oh, darling.
I really do. And if they don't give you a song to do alone, I'll be glad to share my next song with you.
Oh, darling, that's very sweet of you.
Very sweet of you. Marry me some music.
Danny and I are sharing a song together.
Separate checks, of course.
Yes. And separate keys, too, Mary.
How can you believe me when I said I love you when you know I've been a liar all my life?
You had that reputation, thank you, oh you.
I must have been insane to think you'd tell me the truth.
How can you believe me when I said we'd marry when you know I'd rather hang than have a wife?
I know you said I'll make you mine.
But who would know that you would go for that old line?
How can you believe me when I said I love you when you know I've been a liar?
Nothing but a liar.
All my talk gone cheated.
You said you wouldn't love me at all.
That's what I said.
And never would you be gone.
Talk to me, Prudu, talk to me.
Hey, cause you don't wake me.
Oh, no, baby, you must be lonely to trust a lover who's not like me.
You said I'd have everything.
What could I say?
You're a beautiful diary.
I bet I'll see you once upon a lullaby.
You're really naive to ever believe a fool of a lonely phony like me.
Now, wait a minute, I've got something on my mind.
How about the time you went to Indiana?
I was lying, I was down in Alapair.
You said you had some business you had to complete.
If I was doing it, I would be a bad cookie.
And what about the evenings you were with your mother?
I was romping with the heat of the honey lamb.
Two things you swore our love was real.
But baby, leave it not forget, I'm also a heel.
How can you believe me when I said I'd love you when you know I've been a liar?
Nothing but a liar.
All my no good, good, bad, bad lies.
Applause
Well, darling, darling, darling, darling, this about does it for the night.
And I only want to say, oh...
Oh, Chalula.
Yes, darling, Gary.
I have a question, whether I like the delta rhythm or...
I just want to say that I think they're one of the finest quartets.
It's been my pleasure to hear.
And their rendition of that song was one of the most beautifully arranged
and delightfully executed that I've ever heard in my...
Well, Gary, won't you please stop?
You've done nothing all evening but talk, talk, talk, talk, talk, talk, talk.
Also, I'm sorry, darling, but it's time now for me to tell our audience
that I guess next week will be Fred Allen, Robert Cummings, Lorraine Day,
David Durante, Leo DeRosia, Portland Hoffer, Judy Holliday, Frankie Lane,
Jane Pickens, and others, and of course, our very own Mary Wilson
and his Big Show Chorus and Officer.
Until then, may the good Lord bless and keep you.
Whether near or far away, Julie.
May you find back all my waited golden days today.
May your troubles all be small ones.
And your fortunes ten times ten, taxi.
May the good Lord bless and keep you.
Till we meet again, Danny.
May you walk with sunlight shining
And a bluebird in every tree.
May there be a silver lining
Back of every cloud you see, Rudy.
Fill your dreams with sweet tomorrow.
Never mind what might have been, Gary.
May the good Lord bless and keep you.
Till we meet again.
The Delta Rhythm, boys.
May you long recall each rainbow.
Then you'll soon forget the rain.
May the warm and tender memories
Be the ones that will remain.
Fill your dreams with sweet tomorrow.
Never mind what might have been.
May the good Lord bless and keep you.
Until we meet again.
May the good Lord bless and keep you.
Till we meet, till we meet again.
Good night, darling.
Applause
Coming up, Phil Harris and Alice Faye.
Time to make good times on NBC.