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SATIRICAL riEfr

LONDON.

• * •

SATIRICAL VIEW

LONDON.

BY JOHN CORRY,

Author rf ike Detector of Quackerif,
ifc, ifc. SfCm

> I . , I . - ■ .

London Ib by taste and wealth proclaimed

The fairest capital in ail the world —
By riot and incontinence the worst

COWFER.

THE FOURTH EDITION,

PRINTED FOR ROBERT BUTTON^ GRAC£CfrURCH<^STB£eT ;

AN1> JOHN AGO, BRIStOL ;
AXD SOLD BY ALL THE BOOKSELLERS.

1809.

B^ H-TlS'-^\-i'

NARVAftO COLLEGE LIBftAflY

. pnon
The bequest of
evert jan8en wendell

1918

TO THB
HIGHT HONOURABLIT'

SPENCER PERCEVAL,

CHAVCBI<LOR OF THB BXCHBQVEB,

4*C. ifC. ifC,

• Sib,

In an age Tcmarkable for that laxity of
]irinciple wkicA evidently aims at the combina*
lion of virtue and vice, I have been induced to
re-publish a work, the direct tendency of which
is the correction of error. On a review of the
many estimable individuals, illustrious for their
uniform adherence to rectitude, even in this age,
I find none to whom I can with greater propriety
inscribe the subsequent pages than youndf.

I also feel gratified at this^poitunity of
testifyin^^ my personal respect for a character at
once amiid>le ami benign ; at the same tame that I
felicitate my country on the acquisition of a states-^
man equally respectable for hk public and priva^f^
virtues. |^

I have the honour to be j^

Your very obUged ► 15T

And obedient humble servant, " j^^

JOHN A.r. 19a

Btiiiol, Jan. 1, 18Q9. • •- soi

..... til

COWTENTS.

Iiit|Ddnctioii«^**#w* •••••. • • ••..•••••»•»•• 1

Characttriatics of the InhabiUnts of London 9

Eni^hmen 16

WeUhQien Id

Scotchmen 19

Irifhmcn 22

CompttTison of the English, Sc€»ichy and Irish, now resident

Germans 35

Frenchmen ^ 36

Spaniards, Dutchmen, Jews 39

Nobility.^ ^ 41

Gentry : , 49

Merchants 53

Msinners of the Great 57

Dress 70

Female Education - • •-. .....^.. 79

Education of Youth , 9i

Clergy %.., 99

jL<awyerfr. •*..*• ....••..•.»>**•.-•.••.••■»«•*••«•»•*%•*»••. ...k* >•«•«« *«•«•« lus

Physicians 106-

Qnack Doctors 119

Cosmetics 19^

Caricature and Print Shops *• 130

Modem Philosophers ^ 139

Female Philosophers ^. ...» 145

Seduction ^ 157

The Temple of Modem Philosophy 169

Literature » 189

Newspapers » 199

Public Amusements 901

Appendix ^ ^ ,.911

A very entertaining and weU-written performance;
the author of which appears to be a man of extensive
knowledge, ^and jnst observation, possessing also an
acute discrimination of characters and mannets. We
say that it is well-written, and so it certainly is.

Monthly Review far June, ISOU

h.*

INTRODUCTION.

^MONG those cities celebrated in hntory for extent*
ms^nificencey and popttlation, London has for ages been
conspicuous. ' The very name of this repowned capital
excites a sublime emotion in the youthful and adven-
turous individual who, emulous of distinction, pants to
realize the expectations inspired by the fame of London.
Kor is this ambition peculiar to the inhabitants of the
'British isles; adventurers from every civilized nation
have also aspired to eminence in the English metropolis,
where public patronage is impartially conferred on every
meritorious candidate. \ ^ .'%

Psuris has indeed disputed the pre-eminence of London,
but the pretensions of those rival cities to distinction are
Tery different : for while the French capital is enriched
hy the plunder of surrounding nations, and even tyranny
itself derives a temporary lustre from martial achieve-
ment, the English metropolis supports her opulence,
dignity, and glory, by comniercial enterprize.

In tins imraeose capital, including a rcircumlerence
of twenty-six miles, and containing many myriads of
human beings, the observant mind is gratified whh an
inexhaustible variety of interesting objects. Society^ in
all its gradations, fsom regal dignity ^to <th« d^resstoa
of indigence, affords a rich fund of amusement and
instruction. The enjoyments and the evils of life exist
1^ t^is ^feat city jn all their varieties-; and the f^^fsoks
and n^^QAers of the busy, )the gay, fmd the dissjn^ite^y
who suqcessivpjy ^ppea|: in tbi§ world in miniature, pr*^
sep^ copipjax vjew§ pf h^inan qatnre which puzzl^ tb^
speculative philosopbi^r, and afford ample gratificatioo.
tP curiosity.

Adn^iratipfi^is the ^rst ^motion which arises in the
mind of a stranger on bis afrival in London. Tlie extent
cif the squares, the r^jdenpe of wealth and grandeur;:
the magnificence of the bridges, unequalled by any
other effort of human labour ; and the splendour of the
principal streets, with shops and warehouses overfloiring
with every necessai^ of life, every elegance of inventive,
genius, and every production of nature and art for the.
.gjntification of luxury; overwhelm the imagmation. ^A^
healthy af^d actiy^ populatioji crowd the streets; tlie
footways present ^p animated scene of passengers, aum**-
ing along the sam^ pavf;p^ent |ike two different streaiQ&;

• ••

111

fbe air Is &M ^nth the noise^ and the earth trembles
beneath the pressure of various carriages, some for the
accommodation of the opulent, drawn by fleet horses
with the Telocity of the wind, and others conv^ing arti-
eles of commerce, with a slow and regnhir motion^ to
the place of their destination.

A general and cursory survey of -the streets of London
might induce the stranger to imagine that he bad arrived
in a perfect paradise. The beauty of elegant women
moving with graceful ease in the public streets, the air of
satisfaction with which numbers of tradesmen hasten
along, eager for the completion of some important
transaction, and the complacent smile of groops of
young gentlemen sauntering arm in arm, might mis-
lead the visitor into an opinion that London was the
qpot which happiness had chosen for a perpetual resi-
dence.

The experience of a few days will, however, eflfectn^
ally remove the illusion; all the false lustre difiiised by.
novehy will vaobb, and London and its inhabitaots
i^pear as they mre. Thed will the visitor, no longer the
chipe of his own gpod-nataiCi be ready to exclaim with
the poet—.

'* Oh thoa resort ami mart of all the earth,. ^

(3heqaer'd with all complexions of mankind, '"

And spotted with all crimes; In whom' I see^
Much that 1 love, and more that I admire^
And all thai I abhor ; thou freckled fair.
That pleasest and yet »bock'st me ; \ can lau^fa.
And I can weep, can hope, and can despondv
Feel wrath and pity,; when I think on thee!*'

London has, indeed, since the revival of letters, beeir^
an inexhaustible theme, on which panegyric and censuce
have equally been employed, according to the views of
the describer; for while the man of warm imaginatioii
expatiated with rapture on the delights of life wbicl^
abound in this vast capital, the moralist discovered so
much of error and depravity, that his picture of the
Cnglish metropolis was a picture of deformity. Perlj^ps
a medium between these extremes would present a more
accurate portraiture of the manners and characters most
notorious in London, a city which is in«the' most exten-
sive sense of the word the capital of the imited kingdom.
It is, indeed, the attractive centre of science, intelli-
gence, and opulence ; the important spot where legisla-
tors enact, and sovereigns give activity to the laws ; the
depositary of the national wealth, and the citadel^. pi
national glory ; the school of geniuS; and the temple of
intellectual refinement.

.it

■i

llSliatei^r can amuse the fancy or improTeilie taste in
'the most fhikhed productions of human ingenuity, may
l>e found in this emporium of commerce, knowkdg^^
-and elegance. In London the intellectual powers of man
WK excited by the animating motives of competition,
emolument, and reputation, to « degree of energetic
vigour unattainable in the seclusion of retirement. —
-Hence, whatever is excellent in those polished arts
•ivhich contribute to refinement, is to be found in this
•celebrated city — a city more worthy of the attention
-of the pliilosopher than ancient Ilonic in the zenith of
'her glory.

It may be asserted, that a publication like the
present is superfluous, , because morality has been re-
commended by the elegant essays of Addison and

' others; but every age has its peculiar follies and
fashions, which require the correction of the satirist^
nor is the present day deficient in subjects of animad-
version. Though the liveliest exertions of intellect are
incompetent to depict the ever- varying lights and

^shades that- form a picture of London, yet the attempt
tnay afford an agreeable amusement botli to the writer
and the reader. To combine cheerfulness with, reflec-
tion, and candour with satire, has been the design of the
Author, and the public patronage has crowned hii
eflbrts with success.

¥1

lie t^ most powerfal motives that ke^ this Tsst*
joimnunilyin continaal agitatioQ. like the «>d«l»ti«iis
of the oceaoy are the love of pleasure and the love ^
,gain« Venus and her auxiliary, Bacchus, leigo in the
£ishioDable circles. Masquerades, bsdls, ^^tes, fiaUie
and private theatres^ and all the luxuriotts delights that
jfancy can devise, minister to the passions and appetites
, of those sons and daughters of dissipation. AssignatioBS,
seduction, adultery, and elopements, engage the atten-
tion of the voluptuous throng; and were a tem[^ ereel-^
ed in honour of Cytherea, those numerous votaries who
worship her in private would doubtless form a long pro-
cession to offer their gifts upon her altars.

•

In the city, Plutus has a great proportion of worship-
pers, insomuch, that were a golden image like that of
Nebuchadnezzar to be erected,, numbers would sur-
round the precious idol, and, with uplifted hands and
admiring eyes, exclaim, " Gold, thou art the object of
our constant devotion, thy influence has extinguished
th/e light of justice and humanity in our minds!''

{^ondon bein^ inhabited by a medley of varioHs
nations, must consequently exhibit a curious diversity of
character^. To delineate these with the pencil of satite ;
to-tiace deception and vice to their secret haunts, and

«•

til

eft^fb^tn to iJuMie iMieti^rjaM detesiatidfi,
iheyiri>9beftmM;iite|m>^rbf^ honM

Mifist. Itbaseve^ b^n hitf piffifege to *^ shoai fbihf
OM ii^sr and if iSouie icadeH feel f^at fKe^ are exdi-
]Mlediiico1ottr9to6 gfafariiig, let t&enn relificfttiflli those
follies .which are subjects of ridiciile, and the censure
will be BO loQger applicable to tbenu

Hiis work contains not only characteristics of the
native citizens, but of people from different countries
now resident in the English metropolis; remarks on
public amusements and modem literature; animadver-
sious on existing follies and vices ; and a satincal de-
scription of some persons of distinction conspicuous for
their career of dissipation.

The App^ix contains « ^an for the melioration
ofmoralsy andinsfittttiotiW parocRial associations for
the encouragement of industry and virtue. Let the
opulent inhabitants of thb great city consider all the
human beings Jifesident here as the inmates of one im-
mense mansion, in which there are apartments appro*
priated to different persons, according to their rank,
and where it must be for the general good that each
should be comfortably accommodated, so that none
shall feci any temptation to infringe the rights or pro?

Vlll

perty of another. . A litde reflection will convince lu
tiiat at most thb noble emporium is merely a heritage
occupied by succesave generations, in which each
individual should be solidlous to make such lasting.im*
provements as may render his memory dear to posterity.

•' r

■^•^ .

1^ ..

f^-

, .O.t' . V' *«' '• *

l*'-^

' < . ' *

SATIRICAL

VIEW OF LONDON*

Chgrdetemties of the hAahUanis of lAmdon.

J^ HE find oid^r btjiii^s Whkh daims oiir lU^-
tioD is the merchantii^ .iri|i> ztk undoiibtedly the inost
opulent and rtsfieclMk in the Milofldv whether cdnsider-
ed as nieniofbasineMi or private Individuab. Many of
the merchants who hate received is liberal education,
and travelled to form Commercial connections, are u>-
telligent and enterprising m^n; but it must be confessed^
that the greater number Hre rather confined in their
ideas, and connder the art of accumulating wealth as
the principal excdience. Dr. Johnson says, ** there is.
nothing ta trad^ connected with greatnc8ai..of v^vi^i* <m^

tile other bai^p it way nMy be asseited, that eomnwrce
is essentially. mstTumeDtal to the diffttsion of kno^iHedge^
The same ship that comes fre^hted with merchaDdise,
may import a still more vaKmble acquisition to the state,
in the person of the traveller or philosopher, who comes
to communicate new discoveries in^science.

In consequence of their frequent intermarriages with
the nobll^ty^ the highei^ order of dtizens are not otiy
more refined, but more luxurious than their ancestors.
Many of them are possessed of elegant villas in the cir-
cumjacent counties, to which they occasionally retire
from the bustle of business; but the love of rural scenes,
which is so natural to man, seldom predominates in the
mind of the merchant, till he has realised an immense
•fortune. Indeed, the d^ire of gain has become so habi-
tual to several citieesB, that tbey continue to deal hi
stock long alter 4fai^.Jttse .aesigned the more arduous
toils of commerce. The darling pursuit of the- citizen of
London is wealth, and he cheerfully devotes the energies
of his mind to the attainment of that object*

The amasements of the higher class of citizens are si-
milar to those of the great, whose fashions and follies the
city dames and belles are emulous to imitate. They
4i«a(] in tfaepatb diefined by the atbitrasses of the mode ^

Amrtbcr tr»t 4>f tbdr inereMng passioD for dianfMH
tiaii» IS the aigenieM wkh wbick Ibe wives and daugbttts
of the rich citi«iBiit waasMy viA the watering pfaioes^
Tliere, freed firom the lestndnts of domestic prOfnvetyi
they boldiy kanch nto the streaai of high life; where
ittBered by pmam, they are often shipwrecked on the
shoals of kvity, or engulphed by the quicksands of vice.

*' Toor pradent gTAii4-iHiiiiMaf9 ye no4efn MlM,

CoBteot Willi Brhtol, Bath, and Tanbridfe Wellty

Wbeo health requirM it would consent to roami

Else more attached to pleasures found at home.

But now alike, gay widow, virgin, wife.

Ingenious to diYersify dull life,

In coaches, chaises, caravans, and hoys.

Fly to the coast for daily, nightly joys |

And all impatient of dry land, agree

With one consepit to rush into the lea "

The principal foible of the more respectable order of
citizens is self-importance, assumed from a consciousness
of the possession of riches. Their most shining qualities
are probity and benevolence.

A great ptoportion of the opulent tradeatsen ikot ha-
ving country seats, and their amusements being limited

\y tht locality of their sphere -of actmh^ '^f tiatdrall j

turn their attention to tfae^enjoymeat M3it dothestic codr-
fort. In this re^ct they ai« tfxiiloubtedly happier than
any othetmeh^ntile people upon the globe. Indeed the

'^kgaiice and'coni^^nfence of their houses and fhmitnre,
the exeelkndet^f their food, and their deai^i^ess of per-%

'%ohtuld dress, aremdescribabie,

R *

With respect to the generality of those ai;tist£i^ trade%-
tneo« and mechanics, who inhabit th^ city, they are a seljT
opinionated people. Acci^stom^d tp behold the magnifi-
cence of the public bifildiQgs^ and th^ abundance of
merchandise whi^h fills the ^hops and warehouse^ they
by an tibsurd association of ideas consider themj^lveB.
connected with this grandeur apd pp^^en^e^ and liold
e.Y^ foreigner in contempt.

Their pride, however, seldom originates in a con-
sciousness of personal merit; in that respect it must be
acknowledged they are unassuming. They form a much
more judicious estimate of the lvalue of thuigs; and
are proud of their richer, the opulence .of their re-
latives, comparatively brisk trad^^, and other accidental
circumstances. Their kno^l^ge is very limited, msp-
miich that they would prefer a good dinner, or even a
pot of porter acid clean pipe, to' the circle pf th^
idences.

In. jconsequQiice of this too general neglect ofleani&igv
jpmy of them remaki ia a- state of ignoniDce, vrfaicfa not-
i^vithstandhig their ekverness in trade, renders them lia*
Me to bedapedby qnackdoctors andimpostbrr of every
descrq>tion. Indeed, their self love is highly gratified
by theses gentleman-like foreigners whocomesniiling and
bowing to impose on their credulity. They imagme that
these strangers are drawo hither by the fame of the ca*
pita!, and come to admire its inhabitants.

llieir mental attainments are generally confined to a
Itnowledge of trade, and the calculation of money, and
tbey realty consider themselves as the greatest people in
the world* A citizen of London, enviable pre-emi^
iience ! of which no deficiency of genius can deprive the
happy possessor. This alone confers an imaginary
dignity on every ran^ of citizens, from the smutty sweep-
chimney to the gambling stock-jobber.

V While the citizen beholds men of various nations
throng to London, his estimation of himself, and his
contempt of the adventurers who come to partake of his
bounty, are both raised to the higbesrt pitch; On the
other hand, the ingenious and the knavish who assemble
here are attracted by the fame of the metropolis and
consider the natives as a dull, plodding, mercan^race^

Bicapabk of geaen>iis sen(uiteot%' $uMl Imble to 'he
doped by a variety of axtUices,

Their wives and daughters soinetiiiies tisil thc^
theatres, where they make a rapid progres§( in xefiee^
meat. Wonderful indeed most be the improvew^t of
the yoiithfol females who frequent those degant tern*
pies of the Graces, where nonsense is so often sobetl-
toted for wit, and pantomime ibr tragedy. Yet these
are the public places where our gay young .women
obt«iia refined sentim^nt^ which, with the aid of
novels and romance^, confiae the mind to gMisft
attainments, ferment impure desiv^ and inflate &»
male pride.

. One characteristic of the female citizens is the free-
dom with which they analyse the actions of their neigh,
boors, lliey liberally censure each other, not froiQ
any gratification which they receive from satire, bnt
purely for mujtual edification* This love of scandal;
which $o generally prevails among the natives of Loo»
doB, is cherished by their circumscribed situation: great
minds like theirs, unwilling to remsun inactive, must have
some interesting object to contemplate and expatiate o9m-
In this point of view, every te^-taUe cooversatioa^
may be cofi^idered a9 a lecture of mexal pbilosqpbyj^

iriMuw tbf auditf^ are lAstioeted m tlie b^ node of
tracing tbe defc^ctsof oMien.

TbeeMbsofdi(|^iieDtdeiioiiii<iiitioiis into which the
loivoi^elaissesof DiepX^upofsaod tndes
ofteii i^pove detrimental to domestic comfort. Profit-
sion at the akhouse is productive of want at home. —
Discontent and discofd interrupt matrimonial happiness;
nod the husband, «tmig with the reproaches of his mh,
and alienated by the'joyous gratificatioas of conmiality
with his pot-compamous» neglects bis family and his
business; cmuequently he is either arn^sted for debt,
or enlists, ieaviog his wife and children to be supported
by the parish.

benefit societies, liowever, are aseiiil and excellent
institutions, by wbioh a subsistence is secured to each
member during indisposition ; and were tfaey to become
general throughout the empire, they would have the
most salutary efTects both on the health and morals of
the people, by pro^iotiiig industry and beneficence.

During theii^ Sunday rambies^ the Cockneys often
turn to gaze upon the dear town ; and doubtless several
of them would be afraid to lose sight of the spi^ of St*
Paul's, ksit they sh^iM aet find th^ir way homf . Th^

architect who erected that magnificent cathedral, wonKF
have conceived an exalted idea of the religbn of Bag^
land at the beginning of the nineteenth centory, had he
known that the superb dome, so justly admired by all
lovers of architecture^ would serve roei^ly a» a finger^
post to the gay citizens in their pedestrian excursions.

On a general survey it appears that the grand charac-
teristies of the inhabitants of London are an inde&t^a-
ble pursuit of business or pleasure, a ridiculous passion
for notoriety among the higher, and an afiectation of
gentility among the subordinate classes- of the commu-
nity. Indeed a passion for " pleasure,, fume, or pelf,'^
agitates the bosom of the multitude, from .the titled fool
of quality and his extravagant mistress, down . through
the various gradations of society, to the rout of the
washerwoman and the Sunday evMiing musical party of
the hackney-coachman,

ENGUSHMEN.

A considerable part of this great community is com^
posed of the natives of England, who come from the dif-
fkrtnt provinces to reside in London. They are in
general healthy, active, industrious men, whose assist-
ance in the more laborious avocations is highly con-
ducive to the ease and comfort of the citizens.. % •

Many of them are ftfaopkeepers, whose probity re-
requires do eulogtam. Meehanics fonn another divi-
sion, of. those settlers ; and almost the whole weight
of the drudgery of London rests on stout young men
from the country, who are alhired to town by the ex-
pectation oC higher wages thaa the farmers can afford
to give. These adventurers find ample scope for the
eisercise of their corporeal and mental powers in this
metn^lis, into which they incessantly flow like streams
into a reservoir.

They are distinguishable by the peculiarity of their
provincial dialect, 'so different from the language of the
Cockney; while their florid countenances, and muscular
forms, sufficiently evince that they are not natives of a
city.

That good sense which has ever been the characteris-
tic of the English nation,' is the most conspicuous trait
of these honest men, whose activity contributes so much
to the ]m>8perity of London. A flrmoess which some-
times borders on obstinacy marks the unsophisticated
countryman, who is more sincere, though less polished^^
than the luxurious citizen*

. GoldinikhliasdistiiicUy thaiftcterisedthbdesci^iitl^
of EDglufameii ki ihe ioilowmg lines : —

■ ' ' ■ "A thovf htfttl bftndf
*' By forms anfashioa'd fresh from Nature's hand I
'* Fierce in their native hardiness of soul,
" Ttne to imaginM right^-^bove controvl.
** White e'en the peasaat boft^ts those rights to scaft,
** And learns to venerate himself as man.''

WELCHMEN.

Most of tbe Welch residenh in London haye imper-
oeptibly ado[yted the manners of their English neigh'*
boursy yet their characteristic sincerity is still perceptible
to the reflecting observer.

. Honest in their dealings proud of tlieirancestiy, and
inflated with an imaginary superiority winch they ^1 as
ancient Britons^ they am loo apt to have a contempluous
opinion of (he rest of maidcind; but they are generally
distinguislied by that fhnple dignity of conduct which b
ever thei:ompanioa of integrity.

Among our modem writers, the name of Rennant ap-
pears with honour to himself and hb hirth-place ; and
Wales can boast of a lawyer who has perhaps never been

excelled in adkeMnee to justice. Lord Keo^n wa» in-
deed ao ornament to his ooontry^ and entitled to the
applause of evelry lionest man. Unawed by those vicious
characters in hig^ Ufe who encourage UcentiousDess by
their voice and example, his virtue was too exalted t0
associate or coincide with tilled voluptuaries^ and his
name will be ceiebtated by the historian, when L — d
W******, now M. of L— , the M. of B— , and the rest
of the elegant cffcie of modem adulterers and adul-
tFessea, with **^* faiinself at their head, will only be
recorded as instances of profligacy.

SCOTCHMEN.

The priucipal motive of a North Briton's visit to Loq-
don is a desire to profit by his learning and genius. —
Frugal, temperate, and religious, his natural sagacity is
preserved - amidst the enervating allurements of the
town; hence he pursues his avocations with steadiness,
and appropriates the firnits of bis industry with the
strictest ecc^omy. His success is facilitated by that na^
tiooal partiahty for which Scotchmen are remarkable*
Their readiness to promote a reciprocation of benefits
is like ^he brotherly-love of the Quakers, and highly
praise-wortliy ; though it has a tendency to suppress that
universal benevolence which should ever actuate the hu«>
man mind.

Scotchmen bave been long reproached with national
prejudice; but, as that is a species of 8elf4ove which
exists in different degrees in every mind, perhaps they
are not more reprehensible in that respect than the peo-
ple of other nations^ Indeed the resentment which they
generally express against the most elegant tourist who
ever explored their country is irrational,

pr. Johnson travelled to observe the appearance of
the country, and the manners of its inhabitants ; every
unprejudiced mind is delighted with hb narrative, but
unfortunately, as he was defective in the organs of vision,
many of the majestic woods of Caledonia escaped fiis
observation.

To compensate for this deficiency, however^ another
tourist, professor St. Fond, has described Scotland in
such a manner as must be very gratifying to every
lover of natural history. As the French philosophers
have ever been remarkable for their adherence to
truth, and aversion to hj/perbolickl description, we may
conclude that St. Fond's account is accurate. Accord-
ing to him, the face of the country is much improved
since Dr. Johnson visited it. He describes the soil as
fertile, and the people remarkable for their hospitality,
learning, piety, and refinement of manners. This ac-

coniit is corroBonited by a modem description of Scot-
land, published at Edinbui^fa, which is written in a kb<t
of poetical prose, replete with all the imagefy of a fine
ioYention.

The Scotchmen resident in London are industrious^
frugal people, punctual in their dealings, and mdefatiga-
ble in the acqubition of wealth.

With respect to their merit as authors, Scotchmen
have often distinguished themselves as historians, critics,
moralists, divines, and physicians.

In polemical divinity they have made a conspicuous
figure, yet the pernicious principles of modem p^iiloso*
phy have made some inroads among them. It is rer
markable' that those Scotchmen who degenerate into
sceptics and debts, revile Christianity with more malig-
nancy than the unbelievers of any other nation. These
apostates had received a religious education which en-*
joined moral purity and self-denial, consequently when
they became lovers of pleasure, their hatred of the tmth
was greater from the remorse which accompanied their
defection; — as weak eyes are pained by the vivid rays
of sqfar light.

Hie natives of Scotland siow resident in -diis metro-
polismaybe divided hito four dasses: — ^nobSky.and
gently; merchants and tradesmen ; iiteonry adventurers;
and labourers: all of whom we shall describe indiscrimi-
nately under the general heads. At the same time it is
but just to observe, that in all these different classes,
Scotchmen will bear an honourable competition with

the men of any other nation.

Among other moral qualities which adorn the North
Briton^ his honesty and veracity are the most conspicu-
ous. The Scotch nation has for many ages been illustri-
ous for a steady adherence to Christianity. Their
writers have indeed rather represented truth with the
solemn air of a retlnse, thanthe more animated, demean-
our of a smiling grace, but the people have nevertheless
proved their attachment to her dictates even to martyr-
dom! TTo'use the words of the pious Dr. Beattie, hh
coitntrymen are inflexible in faith ; and though those
resident in London may have relaxed somewhat of the
austerity enjoined by a religious education, yet they are
generally a worthy people, whose integrity is founded

on the imperishable basis of Revelation.

y., ■

IRISHMEN.

I - ■ •

No people of any nation now resident in London pre-
sent such a curious diversity of character as the Irish*

We shall fiist dasnfy and delineate tiiofle Irishmen
most remarkable for their oddites, or foibles, and con-
clude with the most estimable.

Among the other qualifications of young Irishmen
who migrate to this city their eloquence is the most re-
maikable. From their constitutional vivacity they are
generally possessed of such a superabundance of animal
spirits that their loquacity is astonishing. In almost
every tavern or coffee-house we meet with one or
more of these orators, whose wit and fluency are exert-
ed for the amusement of the company.

Whatever be the topic — ^philosophy, politics, or the
news of the day — ^the Irish orator speaks with.impressive
energy ; and this communicative disposition b doubtless
sometimes pleasing, and sometimes tiresome to his
auditory.

Our most sensible poet observes, that

*' Words are like leaves, and where they most abotiiid»
Moch fruit of sense beneath is rarely fband." ,

• ■

This simile is sometimes applicable to the Irish orator,
but the* true cause of his volubility is the sprightliness of

bis imagination. This is alsc^ the reason why lively
Irishmen so often commit blunders, as they generally
speak without much reflection or arrangement «f ideas.
Were we to account physically for this JUm of sounds,
it might be asserted that it is necessary both for the
health of the individual and the peace of society that the
volatile Irishman should be privileged to telk as much
as he thmks proper — ^whether sense, nonsense, pr» as is
too often the case, an intermixture of. both. For^ is it
not probable tliat those vivid animal q)irits which when
Tolatilised fly off from the tip of the tongue, would if
retained, operate like heated quicksilver ; aud, by taking
some other course, agitate the limbs, and dischaige
themselves in kicks and cuffs to the great attnoyance of
the coromimityl This hypothesis deserves the atten-
tion of the faculty ; and if duly investigated by a Scotch
or German medical writer, might form a valuable trea-
tise of four or five hundred pages quarto !

Another angular class of Irishmen consists of those
adventurers who repair to London as fortune-hunters,
and assume the character of gentlemen. Tliey are gene-
rally bandsome well-made men, and decorate their natu-
ral comeliness with a fashionable dress. Thus eqiupped,
they frequent the theatres, masquerades, and public
walks; and eagerly seize every opportunity to ingratiate

thevnehffis m& tlie (air sex. Their asaidaity and lively
4»avefsadoii are accomfiiislifiients of the highest order
IB the estimation of the ladies, who» charmed with their
boiBoaroQs compHmentSy and the earnestness ivith which
4b^ ofge their suit, often terminafe the amour by an
elopement and a trip to Grefna^green.

A little reflection, however, must convince a young
woman that the man who feels an honourable attach-
ment will ever be willing to receive her hand from her
pafent -or guardian ; and she ought to reject the prof-
Seted love of every suitor, however amiable, who besi-
.tates to avow his sentiments to her friends.

Another class of Irishmen are those labourers who
principally inhabit the noisome lanes and alleys. of St.
Giles's, and whose depravity exhibits a picture of human
nature from which the philanlhropist turns mounifully
away, however gratifyiBg it might be to the misanthrope.
Yet the inifnorality of these beings is not so great as it
has been represented; the seeds of virtue remain uncul-
tivated in their hearts, while their follies and vices ger-
minate in tlie foul atmosphere of obscenity. . Their ab-
surditiea^ though many, are generally ludicrous; and
their actions form a tragi-comic series, indicative of
feelii^ and humour. For instance, they have a great

itveience for Saint Rmcras' church-yani, as groimd
consecrated by the remains of good catholics frcMn time
immemorial. On the death of any of their fratefnity,
they carry the deceased on a bier to that repo^toiy,
having previously cheered themselves with a dram to
dissipate gloomy ideas. • By • the time the corpse is in-
terred, the liquor having begun to operate, after seve-
ral agreeable jests, -some man. of nicer fedings than the
rest takes offence at another, loud sounds of discord are
vociferated in the Irish language by the of^onents,
blows succeed, and a battle royal ofpeihaps a dosen of
combatants presents an animated scene in the field op-
posite the cemeteiy.

When they have vented their passion, and bestowed
a number of contusions on each other with the greatest
liberality, they shake hands, and march off the field of
battle to the next alehouse, where they drown their ani-
mosity in generous liquor; and oi| their return to town,
one of the party exerts his vocal powers in some humour-
otts Irish song, while his companions join in diorus.

Having sketched a description of the foibles of those
yoimg Irishmen who come to London to cuia daah^ and
also given a picture of the manners of the Irish labourers
in this city^ it would be itiiberalnot toxharaeteriaethetr

couBtfyniai iidio are distioguisbable fiirttiotedjgiiityfiP

It is araoDg the fa^ettcboKs of the Iiish that ire are
to look for the brighter tints of character, and no peqile
possess more exalted ideas of honour and magnanimity.
The Irish nobitity and gentry are (perhaps reprehensiUo
in a patriotic poiitf of vieW for diamig the cash from
their temintry in Ireland, but this metropolis derives a
manifest advantage firom that circumstance. »

The foible of the Irish nobility and gentiy resident in
London is a passion for luxurious pleasures; and the
virtues which they possess in an eminent degree are can^
dour, hospitality, and generosity. These amiable traits
of mind are indeed hereditary among every class of ^he
Irish nation: even their enemies confess the truth of the
assertion. But imdoubtedly their candour too often
degenerates into insolence, and their generosity becomes
profusion. Could they pursue the golden mean equally
remote from extremes, they possess those social qualities
of the heart which are essential to the happiness of

society.

The middle, and indeed the most estimable, class of
Irish residents m the English metrt^hs, is comi¥isedtf

flierchaiits and tradesiiieOy and peiliaps no men evince
more honour, candour, and generosity, in all their
transactions. These are the Irishmen who, by avoiding
the Tortex of dissipation, bec<Hne some of the greatest
ornaments of society.

Comparison of the English, Scotch^ and Irish, now

resident tii London.

*' Though black and white blend, soften, and vnlte
A thousand ways, are there no black and white T'

POF«.

It is amusing to develope the distinguishing traits of
the natives of these three kingdoms, now united in one
mighty empire.

The love of the Englishman, though often intense, is
cciitmonly influenced by some secondary consideration,
such as riches, convenience, or the benefit, of a respec-
table connection. The North Briton loves a bonnie
lassie dearly, and his affection is not diminished by the
expectation of a dowry : while the Hibernian, though
often reproached as a fortune-hunter, generally loves his
mistress for her beauty and accomplishments.

The friendship of the Englishman is cordial and con-
sistent; the Scotchman is also a sincere friend; (he

fridkidsliip of the Irishmau, though more fervid, is like
the blaze of a taper, too often liable to be extioguished
by the first gust of his anger.

In religion^ the Englishman is as systematic as in the
regulation of his business ; the Scotchman is still more
strict in performing the duties of his faith ; and tlie Irish-
man, ^ho loves God and his neighbour as well as either,
is seldom solicitous to appear religious.

In literature^ as in conmMrce, the Englishman has a
large capital, which he improves to the greatest advan-
tage : the Scotchman, who derives part of his intellectual
wealth from others as it were by iuberitance, applies the
rich bequest .of Homer, Virgil, and other illustrious
aucients, to his own use with propriety ; but he rather
lives on the interest than increases the stock. On the
contrary, the Irishman inherits but little from the
ancients. His literary wealth consists in the rich, but
unrefined ore of his own genius, with which he adven-
tures to almost every part of the globe, and is often uft-
sttccessful, though sometimes his bullion is coined into
current money.

For solid learning, sound philosophy, and the hap-
piest flights of the epic and the dramatic muse, the Eog-

may Inusard a cotnpaiiMm wiA tmy other natkiiBd —
.The Scotch Utentti, with lese claim to origifiality» suc-
cessfully pursue the useful researches of divinity, lustory,
and critidsm ; whOe the Irish, without either the exten-
sive knowledge of the foiniery or the discnminatiBg sa-
gacity of the latter, often excel in genuine wil^ ironieal
humour which commands risibility, and that pathos of
.aeasibility whipb melts the heart. In suf^KMt of this
assertion, England has produced a Newton, a Miltcm,
and a Shakqseare ; Scotland can boast of a Blair, a
Robertson, and a Beattie; and Ireland, as a proof of the
-justice of her pretensions, can bring forward a Swift, a
Goldsmith, and a Sterne.

With re^[)ect to pride, the Englishman glories in the
superiority of his country in wealth, trade, and civiliza-
tion; and his opinion is confirmed by beholding people
from all nations in London. The ambition of the North
Briton is cbeiished by his learning, and the antiquity of
his family; and the pride of the Irishman is generally
4»nfined to his own endowments, the beauty of his mis-
press or wife, or the accomplishments of his friend.

Both the Scotch and Irish residents in London seem
-pretty unanimous ia their preference of the productions
■^f tbeir respective coaotries to those of £ngland,r^

FrbnitiieireQk^mnis it sboidd appear, that Ae oat^
cakes of the former were, like the heavenly maima, deli«
cioiis to erery pakte; and the potatoes of the latter, at
least equal in fiatour to pine4ipples I What renders this
species of vanity the more oensarable is, the conviction
mhkh they mnst fiwi of the present superiority of Eng-
land in ciUtivation and produce. The causes of this are
bbvions to eyeiy comprehensive mind. London has
long been the seat'of goYerament, consequently its pro-
gress in ajts and refinement must have had a powerful
effect on the improvement <^the comtry. Hither the
most ingenious men of both Scotland and Ireland repair
for patronage, and the nation that rewards them natural-
ly receives ^the first benefit of their improvements in
^rioulture, or any othd: of the nsefid arts.

The hereditary ill-will which has for ages existed be-
tween the people of Great Britain and Ireland deserves
the investigation of the philanthropist. Britoos have
4>een accustomed to consider the Irish as barbarians,
■and to hate them with the most unfeigned sincerity ;
while the Irish are not ungrateful for the contempt
shewn by their neighbouring islanders; and to do them
justice, their animosity has been equally malignant.

What renders this disposition still mmre rational is,
Ihat the people of both countries profess a religion

yH^hith isicak2Ats peace ttnd good-^oiU among men! but
they seem to have forgot this precept, or rather they act
in direct contrariety to it, aa witches are said to repeat
their prayers backwards.

This disposition has doubtless been cherished by the
rivalry of conmierce, and perhaps it is a ha{^y circiun-
staoce for onr continental enemies. Were tlie people of
those islands to act with cordial onanimity, their com-
petitors might de^)air of success: is it not, Jtherefore,
very disinterested and laudable in them to counteract
the happiness of each other, that their enemies may pro-
fit by their animosity?

It would, however, be much to the mutual interest,
not only of the residents in London, but the inhabitants
of the empire, if each individual would endeavour by
repeated efforts to divest himself of those narrow pre-
judices which are so injurious to the general welfare. —
However amiable a predilection for our native country
may appear, it ever impedes the expansion of intellect,
as ivy clings to the trunk of the oak„ and while it seems
to beautify, prevents the growth of its supporter.

These hints are particularly applicable to the lower
clasises of both islands, as it is not uncommon for Eng-

lish mechanics to treat emigrant workmen of the sister
isle with the most inhospitable coldness and austerity,
under the impression that they are intruders, who come
to circumvent them in business.

The higher classes of both countries, however, have
long manifested a reciprocal esteem, as is evident from
their frequent intermarriages, and the most amicable in-
tercourse. Perhaps the blissful era will come when all
animosities will cease among mankind, and the intervene-
tion of a strait, a river, or a mountain, will no longer be
considered as a pretext for selfish distinctions among
men.

*' Self-love but serves the virtooos mind to wake.
As the small pebble stirs the peacefnl lake;
The centre movM, a circle straight sacceeds,
Another still, and still another spreads ;
Jriends, parents, kindred, first it will embrace ;
His country next; and next, all human race :
Wide, and more wide, the o'erflowings of the mind
Takes ev^ry creatnre in, of evVy kind;
Earth smiles around with boundless bounty blest.
And Heav'n beholds its image in his breast.'

GERMANS.

The Germans resident in the English metropolis may
be conyprehended in three classes: the first consists of

Jeamed naturalkts, physkiatis, and chyiQists; the second

comprises a ntimber of artists, and youthful adventiirers:;

and the tliiid class is composed of tiadesmen and
mechanics.

Among the truly estimable characters, it would ap-
pear invidious to mention any individual as pre-eminent;
and they all know, by pleaang •experience, that the
British public is willing to 'discriminate and patronise
genius and merit, from whatever climate they come with
just claims.

It must be confessed, indeed, that some young adven-
turers, who mistake the effervescence of the mind for the
sublune conceptions of reason, sometimes arrogate a
superiority in literature, which exists only in their own
. imagination. On the other band, many intelligent Ger-
mans complain, that only the most frivolous and absurd
productions of their countrymen have been translated
into English, while the best works of theur poets and
philosophers continue neglected. This assertion is
doubtless just ; and it would be meritorious in our male
and female translators to introduce continental science
to the English reader, instead of those ridiculous and
incongruous dramas, romances, and poems, with which
ihey have ^o long abused our patience.

Of fill the tidventorers who migmte from Germany to
this capital, the quack doctors are n^ost censurable.
Iliese empirics, without hesitation^ boldly propose to
^work miracles. One restores sight to the blind, and
"Bnother counteracts nature, by the restoration of health
to the emaciated valetudinarian. Despairing of success
on the continent^ they come hither to profit by the bo-
oest ciedtthty of a people who have ever been too easily
^oped by impost<»s.

Those German tradesmen and artiiicen who have
-emigrated to this capital, are in general very honest and
mdustiiotts ; consequently they are valuable members of
the community. Indeed, every class «f Germans is
distinguishable by a pleasing frankness of address and
demeanour, which forms a medium between the distant,
but dignified, manners and deportment of the English,
and the lively, but intrusive, flippancy of the French. —
At tfie same time it must- be acknowledged, that our
continental visitors are not without foibles and pecultari*
ties. They are too ready to cavil at our manners and
-customs, even when time has familiarised them; but
whether this propensity arises from the pursuit of ideal
perfection, or fipom that inclination to censure, so gene-
ral among .mankind, is unknown. Certain it is, that
.sonoue Germans satirise our unskilfulness in architecture.

because oor doors and windows admit a little of tbe
pure air; and wish us to drink ooifee, study the Kant^n
phiflosophyy and substitute tbe plays of Kotaebue for
these of Shakespeare; — thus evincing to tiie worid our
refinement of taste 1

There are, howerery many exceptions sanong eveiy
order of the Germans who now reside in this capital;
men who would be an honour to any country. When
will that selfish and contracted principle mis-named
patriotism give place to universal philanthropy, which,
embracing all mankind as brethren, will feel no peculiar
partiality, except for those enviable mortals who pos-
sess superior talents and virtues 1 When will mankind
agree to promote mutual peace and happiness on the
earth, instead of the homicide which attends competi-
tions for wealth and power 1

FRENCHMEN.

Several Frenchmen, who have sought an asylum in
London during the present contest, endeavour to make
themselves, not only agreeable, but in some respects
pecessary. Witness the literary productions of the
Abb6 Barreul and others, who have written with all the
poignancy of sarcastic satire against the French republic.

literary Frenchmen formerly Tisifed London from mo-
tives of curipsity, and a desire to enlarge their minds;
but those who now reside here repay their protectors by
writing against their persecutors. Thus they have saved
us the drudgery of invective against our eneniies: but,
however they may reconcile this conduct to their own
feelings, it renders their principles questionable in the
estimation of unprejudiced men.

The Frenchmen now resident among us are well
known to be emigrant noblesse^ priests, and persons of
an inferior class. They are in general very inoffensive,
intelfa'gent men, but mo^ly tinctured with that national
vanity which accompanies a Jrenchman like his shadow.

We may fonn some idea ^f the seductive manners of
:the French, from the account publicly stated as a fact,
.that the emigrant priests have, since their arrival among
us, converted two thousand maid servants to the catholic
faith!

Several French ladies who accompanied their fugitive
friends, have contributed in some degree to the improve-
ment of our countrywomen. The broad stare, the
waving arm, and the tripping gait, are strong indications
x)f the decency of French manners; and to dq our fair

feinales justice, especially those of the higher cla89es>.
they seem to Jiave soccessfully imitated their polished
visitors*

It lis almost impossible to exclude the pernicious and
Sitheistical opinions of the French, that (like the sirocco
l¥hich withers the .bloom of Sicilian fields) depraves the
mpjals of those who imbibe them ^ and it behove» us,
both as men and christians, to prevent the inroads of
thts baleful philosophisme with as much enei^ as we
would repel their invading armies.

The precept of the Grecian philosopher * reverence
thyself seems in one sense to be the fevourite maxim or
the French. This amiable. self-loVe, which they indulge
to such excess, is thus descijbed by Goldsmith : " Every
thing that belongs to them and their nation is great ;
magnificent, beyond expression ; quite romantic ! Every
garden is a paradise ; every hovel is. a palace; and every'
woman an angel. They shut their eyes close, throw
their mouths wide open, and cry out in rapture, Sacre!
what beauty ! O ciel ! what taste ! Mort de ma vie ! what
grandeur! was ever any people like ourselves] we are
the nation of men, and all the rest no better than two-
legged barbarians.'^ If this whimsical account be com-
pared with the hyperbolical proclamations and other

public papers of the gnai nathn, as they have most
ridiculously denomloated themselves, it will be* found .a.
&ithful portrait of French vanity, which is still increased
by our childish imitation of their follies and feshions. —
Our propensity to adopt foreign amusements and senti-
ments is a most odious degradation of our own original'
genius The names of Marmontel, De Lille, La Haipe,
Madame de Genlis, Mercier, and several other dbtin-
g.ud>ed contemponrie,. wiU .umve the Iktk pn^adices
of this age; and when the blissful reign of peace shall
be re-established in Europe, we shall derive much use-
ful knowledge from the acute researches of tMir great
Etvals m arts and arms*

To explore the regions of ^nature in quest of useful
discoveries, is the honourable task of the true naturalist;
and to promote the welfare of society by the unerring
principles of revelation, is the province of the moralist.
May we ever be able to sustain a generous. competition
with the French nation in every art that can contribute
to the safety and happiness of society !'

SPANIARDS, DUTCHMEN, JEWS..

With respect to the Spaniijirds and Dutch who have
{i^ttled in London, their number is too inconsiderable to

require a particular description. The Spanish merchant^^
retain their characteristic honour in all their commercial
transactions; and the Dutch are as indefatigable in
pursuit of wealth here as in Amsterdam,

A very distinct, class of the inhabitants of London
consists of Jews. It is computed that they amount to
twenty thousand ; and though a few of them are respec-
table characters, the majority are notorious sharpers. —
Their adherence to the Mosaic law prevents them from
mixing with the rest of their fellow-citizens ; hence they
absolutely subsist on the industry of others, and become
public nuisances. The Jewish dealers in wearing appa-
rel, gold, and silver, purchase these articles at an under-
value without scruple; hence they are the principal
receivers of stolen goods, while the itinerant Jew-hoys
circulate base money in every direction.

A classification of the different gradations of rank
which constitute a populous community, is extremely
di^cult; for though pride may inflate the nobleman or
the merchant with preposterous ideas of an unapproach-
able superiority, reason will never admit artificial dis-
tinctions as paramount to the claims of genius. Yet
£ven the pretensions of impostors are often successful in
Lojidon; nay, a very recent instance of an impudent

upstart having accidentaliy obtained the bononr of
knighthoody is illustrative of the hxH, To render this
presumption more glaring, it is well known that the
egotist, but a fiew years ago, was condemned by the
laws of his country to solitary imprisonment, for the
dissemination of seditious principles. The forgiveness
of injuries is doubtless magnanimous, and honours con-
ferred on a traitor, may transform him into a loyal sub-
ject; yet the loyalty of the knightof the brazen vizor
is questionable, and his exaltation reminds us of the
following epigram: —

** Wbeo men of infamy to grandeur soar,

Tbey light a torch to show their shame the more/*

NOBILITY.

Honour or shame from no c6ndition rise)
Act .well your part — there all the honour lies.

Our nobility are entitled to observation, both in con-
sequence of their exalted station in society, and the in*
fluence of their example on the manners of the age. —
Some persons of rank are as remarkable for their virtues
as others are for their follies; but the dissolute being
ambitious of public notice, and their vices having a per-

iijk;iou8 effect in the cootaminatioii of public morals, thetr
mo$t prominent foibles sbs^U be first iiiTestigated.*.

A little observation will convince us that both the vir-
tues and vices of persons of quality are imitated by the
subordinate classes. Is the nobleman a voluptuary? —
bis menials are al^o devoted to pleasure; and the lux-
urious manners of the fine lady are imbibed by her fem-
me-de-cbambre. If such be the force of example, would
not decency of deportment and the practice of virtue by
persons of quality be imitated by their various depeur
dants 1

*■ The following instaDces will demonstrate the present pro-
fligacy which pervades high life : —

Court of King's Bench, May ^, 1801..

Mr. G. Stifrt brought an action of damages for 9^10,000,
against the Marquis of Blandford, for criminal conversation
with his wife.

The Attorney General, as leading counsel for the Noble^
Marqnisy put his defence on two points. First, that the
plaintiff had been accessary to tiiat dishonour of which he
complained. Secondly, that Mr. Sturt had been living for
several years past in adulterous concubinage with Madame
Krumpholtz, who played upon the harp, and by whom he
bad five children. The Attorney General contended, that a
man so conducting himself, ' had no- right to stand iji a court eC
justice, and to call upon a jury fordams^ges.

Lord Kenyon reprobated the conduct of all parties.

Damages one hundred pounds^

' IWlth respect to the gay part of our nobility, who ate
the arbiters of faduon, an4 by whose caprice not only
Qur dres8> but our amusements are regulated, they gene-*
rally spend Ae winter in London. These refined mortals
may be compared to birds of passage, as they migrate
in the summer, and go about " seekmg rest bui finding
none/' Happiness is their idol, but they pursue her in
the semblance of selfish pleasure^a Ibrm ,in which she
will never be found. True happiness eoosbts in benefit
cence; and did those exalted Totaries* ef vanity take

Court 0/ Kin^s Bench, May 28, 1801.

The Hon. Ft Wyndham, against the Earl of Wycombe, for
af 10,000 damages, for a criminal conversation with the plain-
tiff's wife, daring their residence in Italy.

Mrs. Wyndham, on accoont of the illness of some of her
children, went I0 Bologna f when Lord Wycombe met her, h6-
accompanied her thence to Turin, and afterwards to Lausanne f.
at the latter place they lodged in the same hotel, and a woman
named Sombolina proved the offence of adultery. The defence-
was, that the plaintiff had not only^been guilty of gross inat-p
tention and neglect towards his wife, but also of incontinence.
That he lived in open concubinage with a Madame Bartoli ;.
and kept another lady named Mari, and took furniture, &c.
from 'the house of his wife for the accommodation of his mis-,
tress, whom he had taken from two gentlemen who had pre-
viously nfkintained her. After some observations from Lord
Kenyon, the Attorney General consented to. a nonsuit,^ which,
issued accoxdingly*-

half the pains to be usefU that they do to be prejudicial
to the community, they would act up to the dignity of
that high rank in which they were placed by Providence,
and be at once the ornament of London and the glory
of their country!

The wealth, superb mansions, and splendid equipages,
of our dissipated nobility, and the alacrity with which all
their commands are obeyed by obsequious menials, are
powerful stimulants to their pride. A multitude of in^
genious heads and busy hands are continually employed
for their gratification ; every elegance that art can bestow
is theirs, and their path is smoothed to th^ enjoyment of
every delight. Can such elevated beings, exulting on the
summit of pleasure, look down and sympathise with the
miseries of the indigent? — Shall wretchedness approach
the habitation of grandeur? — Can sorrow or pain invade .•
the " rich and perfumed chambers of the greatT' Yes,
sometimes these intruders will pay a temporary visit ; nay,
even death itself violates huoian happiness in those de-
licious abodes !

When the beauties of spring invite our nobility to the
country, the citizen feels all the regret of selfishness at
tlieir temporary absence. He explores hb ledger with a
heavy heart, and beholds the accumulated account un-

paid, Mrhile his noble customers are flying away from
him on horses fleet as the wind. Well may he censure
the tardiness othommrabk mm in the payment of their
bills!

** Anticipated rents and bills onpaid
Force many a shining youth into the shade;
Not to redeem his time, but his estate,
And play the fool — but at a cheaper rate."

- The dealers in lace, millinery, perfumery, and cos-
nietics, have most reason to refnne at the annual excur-
sions of the fashionable and gay. Our nobility, indeed,
like the genial sun, give existence to the various insect
tribes of effeminacy that thrive oniy in their fostering
smiles.

. If the votaries of pleasure pay a transient visit to the
antique castles of their ancestors, where hospitality once
reigned, they, soon grow listless, and all the charms of
Flora's musky tribes afford them little amusement. Im-
patient of solitude, and unable to bear the presence of
reflection, they hasten to some watering place, where
they purify the exterior by frequent ablutions. . Can
vice exist where external purity prevails 1 — alas ! the cold-
bath is too often resorted to as a preparative for the re-
petition of new excesses during the next winter's cam-

paigamthenietropoGB; and though our iBodem god-
'desses rise like Venus irresistibly charming from the 8ea»
jet few of them are possessed of the chastity of Diana.

A variety of amusements gratify the fancy of the fre-
quenters of watering-places :--the morning ride or walk
along the winding shore : the agreeable trip in a pleasure-
boat ; the newest publications at the circulating libraries ;
and the exhibition of pantomimes and farces at the tem-
porary theatres. The whispers of scandal, and the sighs
of wantonness, vibrate in unison, as the gay throng wan-
der through the deceptive labyrinth of unreal pleasure —

'^ That, like the circle boaoding earth and skies.
Allures from far, and as they folloW' flies."

In this vortex of dissipation, the fair sex are made gid-
-dy with the flattery of their beaux : here the kept-mis-
tress rears her supercilious front with unblushing confi-
dence; and wantonness,' sanctioned by the approving
sniile of the great, appears amiable ! What an excellent
school for the youthful modest vii^in ! Here the modish
rake will exercise every artifice to efiect her seduction.
His graceful form, elegant manners, and the ease attain-
ed by having seen the world, render this accomplished
love( irrisistible ; insomuch thaf^ allured by his seduc*

live wiles, she eldpes with her Jietrsyer, mars her own
happin^Sy and blasts the hope of her fond parents.

When the man of ^hiou reTislts the metropofis, he
commences his winter campaign by an intrigue. Some
beautiful young maid-servant, or milliner, has attracted
him: her vanity is gratified by the flattery of my lord :
she has often read in novels of noblemen manying for
love, and why should not she be a lady 1 Seduced by
his pronoises, she elopes: her satiated betrayer soon
turns her out of doors, Or consigns her to that inhuman
monster a bawd* After a nauseous course of excess,
disease, and misery, an untimely deith closes the scene,
and the charming creature, who might have been happy
in a life of innocence, perishes by the artifices of aii
exalted villain.

Yet this atrocity is considered by the world as a mere
^ct of gallantry ; and while we hang a wretch for stealing
a trifling article, we smile on the elegant man who robs
^n unprotected viiigiu of honour and happiness!

That class of men commonly denominated old bache-
lors are the greatest violaters of female chastity ; and
many of them who are opulent continue in a state of
-celibacy, under the supposition that they enjc^a greater

degree of liberty than tiiey Woold in wedlock. But
while they continue slaves to their aj^tites, where is
their boasted freedom? Would not the sincere endear-
ments of a wife be iniSnitely more felicitous than the
capricious blandishments of a kept-mistress; the proud
contemplation of a legitimate progeny be more satisfiic-
tory and respectable than that of children reared under
the stigma of illegitimacy!

One of the most pernicious nuisances of London is the
insolence of voluptuaries, who, relying on the respectabi-
lity of their rank, and the weight of their purse, endea-
vour in open day to seduce young women who attract
their attention in the public streets !.

Lord G. well known fo^ his amours, one day in pasr
sing through Throgmorton-street, observed a beautiful
young woman st2mding at a merchant's door. * After
viewing her attentively,- he went to a coffee-house and
wrote a note, which he sent to her by his footman, with
ViXL oSev oi twenty guineas 2L week as the price of her
virtue. The girl, though only a servant, happening to
be a raethodist, consulted a religious friend on the oc-
casion, who dissuaded her from the acceptance of his
Lordship's proposal. But though she so nobly with-
stood .tiiis ordeal, the accident made an impression oa

iief mifid uniatottrable to Tiittie» nisoniucli that i^ a 6ir
xnoatfas afletwafiis she actually eloped with a nurried
and thod becane the vktim of sedactioo.

species of delmqueiicy may be denominated
y^emidde ; for the monster who betrays a credulous vii^gin,
luid c<msigns her lo infiuny. Is in reality a most relentless
Diarderer!

GENTRY.

Left Done presume

To wear an andescrved dipiifty.

SnAKESPfrARE.

From their freedom of interconrse, contiguity of rest-
denoe» and frequent inter-marriages, our nobility and
^gentry may be consideied as one great body. The con-
stitution hasy indeed, distinguished them into separate
classes, by conferring on the former the honour of being
legirfators by hereditary succession, while the latter are
jippointed by ekctioo. But in a i^ral light their vir-
tues and vices, manners and amusements, are the same*,
i^ith a few slight shades of difference.

Whai our ccnrntiy geiiUefiMii first artive iti^ Loiiddii
they uiidergo'a cotuplete iii«ttm6rphb^k Tbt*fikm^
tioo from the cool breeaes tbat yentilate Hieir rural re-
treat/ to the warm atiiibspfaerie bftfaii metropoliiy i^cts
those fosticswith a malady wbith maybi?^t^ed a itatii-
fevtr; iiiidfer its faifioetice they become deikiom^ ikd.'
madly rush into the vortex of iashiokiabk disatpatioif.-^
The facility with which the squire adopts t&e modish
dress, phraseology, efieminacy, and vices, of the town-
bred rake, is almost incrediblcr On his arrival the no*
velty of the scene, and the extent, population, and
magnificence, of the, city, filled him with astonishment. —
Ashamed of his viilgarlty of manners and dialect, he was
silent and reserved, till an introdjiiction to a few polite
men of the world taught him to overcome his iincouth
bashfulness. 'Once initiated in modish follies, be boldly
divests himself of decency ; frequents taverns and stews;
stares at passing females in the streets ; and, in conse-
quence of his vigorous constitution, becomes a more
vociferous and outrageous blood than the feeble cit who
had been practising from his infancy.

Boldly independent in principle, lie proves by his
actions that pleasure is his idol, and the' shafts o^ bis-
ridicule, forged by obscenity on the anvil of dulness, are
directed-~by modem philosophy against tbat religion
which his ancestors held in due veneration.

. tt jtnijf^st.b^ copfesiedy that the fine arts.owe their pre-
aeiit perfe<;tioii to, the muoificence of our nqbility and
gen^; and the theatres inay be said .to exist in conse-
qu^iic^ of the annual visits of the gay and the opulent to
JLoi|^dpn. Besides, %vhat a number of perfumers^ hair-
diressers, and other creatures of fashion, would be desti-
tute if deprived of the patronage of the great? Nay,
do not the taverns, gaming-houses, and bagnios,' owef
tbeir chief support to the profusion of young men of
fashion?

One characteristic .which denoto .the. accomp}ishe4
modem fine gentleman is; his skill. in the arts of seduc*-.
tion. To allure a thougbtle^ girl by. presents and pro*
fessioils of love, and afterwards relinquish her to infamy^
is such an heroic achievement, that the man of gallantry
is prouder of his conquest over the credulity ofamaideny
" and the rich plunder of a taken heart," than a hero
would be of the wreath of victory. The moralist may
censure the conduct of the seducer. 9s infamoi^s, hot con-
sidering thatfiishion can make vice appear amiable.*

* The meanness attendant on intrigue, and the unwilling-
ness, which the most refined voluptuary wduld feel to have his*
amours recorded, is strilcin^ly manifested by the foUowlns
anecdote:

Racine, the celebrated Prctich writer, soon after his ap-<
pointment to the place of bistoriograpber to Louis XI Y* rc'^

^ St31« however, there are many iUastrious exc^tk>ii§
to .the predonunant depravity so prevalent among t^
hif her classes ; and if our nobility and . gentry would
seriously reflect on their influence in society, they wbulcl
discover, that an imitation of their follies and vices has
pervided eveiy subordinate class of the conimunity.
Divines mi^> preach, and moralists write in vain, if the
affluent practioe and encourage vice. But the dissolute
exclaim, '' Can the example of li few individuals re-
claim the world ? — ^must we fbilego our pleasmn&si to pro-
mote public happiness? Let the parsons inculcate mo-
rality, they aK paid for it: but we will live» while we
iive ! Such aie ^ Migge^tions of selfishdissipaUqa.

Bui were our persons of distinction to return to .die

I '■ ■' . . .■*

fii«itipil am aodSe9«f I .^ Sire," -satd ke^ Vau liistoriaD oo^fat
9ot to fat|eP{ lie is bound to rej^esent bis hero exactly as be
19 : in wbat way doei your majesty choose tftat I sbotitdsjf^ak.
of your gallantries ?" — **'Pas8 Ibem over," replied the king
cooly. *^ Bot« ala^t "firet what I omit the reader will sup-
ply. "-—^'Pa^t Hie«)l eirer, I te4l yoO)" cried I^otiis Impatiently.
*•* A* there are many incredible things in the life of yourin^e«>
tyi tht sitMcrity-wjtlt wbich.I should a¥ow the wcuknesses of
my hero to my reader will oersuade him that I regard the
truths and ibis regard to truth will, in his mind, be a pass-
port for my history." — *' I am not yet decided in my opinion
wbat you ought to. do," replied Louis whh ^ look of inquie-
liide-)^* aU tbfd l^an tell you at present is, to pass over my
li}*riguH/*

£3

-Iimiiooiui orbit. or.Tiitiiey whenoe, like wmnimmg §imr»»
J^ey are making coittinual abeiratioos — wera they tp

shine like a benign ,coii8teUatioOy they would; at 0Bce»

beautify and bannooise society^

Bat now, alas t

•
*' To the lascivtoos pipe and waatoa iongy
They dmrn down care tad ffolle U aloHif i
Wttli maa rapidity, aad ancoacemt
D*wo to tba falpk> from whence it J10 retiurii."

And the humrious fasbkmsri^Ie woild nay be c<mi-
pared to the North-American liidiaiii who is lulled aidaep
in bis canoe above the caianui: of Niagaia« and dntaliis
of illusory happiness, till^awakingy too late, he feek bioH
self'precipitated by the roaring wOiun into the tiemea-
.4I0US and foammg abyss t

J^ERCHANTS.

. ' ' '- .

if eAY^n speed the canvas gaUaoUjf^ anfarrtf.

To ftirnish and accomniodate airerld ! >

To giVe the pole the prodnre of tbe Buav

4nd. Iniit ill* unsocial climates liUo <iiie» . r

• »

!?•▼«•?

'S4

^ » '

Our merchants Lave loag been justly "considcfecl as
essential to our political existence. To their enteiprise
we are indebted for the delicacies of every clime ; conse*
quently they are instrumental to the comfort of society,
though they have contributed to the effeminacy of the
age, l>y the importation of exotic luxuries.

As public characters, the punctuality apd cr^it of our
merchants have loflg^beene^bHshed; ahid wheirany na-
tional exigence requires a contribution, the generosity of
the mercantile body excels even that of the nobility.

In'privAt^ life |h.ey .generally are amiable characters.
Btlt,'. however estfftiable when detached from business,
they seem' to conskter many evils connected with com-
merce as necessary consequences, and therefore venial.
Commerce, that empress of luxuryand dissipation, pours
her treasures into this city ; the people become selfish ;
and while Trade lib<;rally rewards her votaries, she laughs
at llie scruples of conscience. What was once stigma-
tised with the name of extortion, is now softened into
speculation. Speculation is a sonorous word^ a|;^lied
with great success both in trade and philosophy ; but its
true meaning in plain English is i mpositiok. The spe-
culaling-merchant looks forward, and perceives that there
will probably be a scarcity of an article of commerce: be

haptens to parcliase: the event justifies his expectailioii,
and Jie sells his merchandise for perhaps double the pri<je

it cost.

» • »

.Bfit.this is a veiy moderate monopoly. Let us for -a
moment tuin pur eyes tov^rds the East, and we m\\ be-
hold an inofi^niHve people deprived of their posse9sions
hy men whom they seTer injured, and who liv^ hi a01u-
'eqce and luxury on the spoils of the widow and tile fn-
theriess. . What s^ys Coamecce? — they are aH honour-
■able men*

. . • '.♦ • * '

The spirit of enterprise in this vast city is astonishing.
Corniactors monopolise our grain ; and even dairy-
, men prevent the waste of milk and butter by ei^liancing

■the price of these necessaries!

. . • • •

Many slight deviations from rectitude are overlooked
/in civilised society. Perhaps the most pernicious evil
Hvhich accompanies wealth is/ the idea that every thing
is purchaseable ; that the integrity and talents of men,
aad the.cfaastity of women, may be sacrificed on the
altars of Mammon ; nay, that loVe and even friendship
are venal. This assertion, though plausible, and in too
many instances applicable, is not true; and itVere much
to be wishedj for the honour of hiunan nature, that its

failacy should be exposed by every lover nffipeiBlba^
piness.

Those moralists who contend that maiikind are hqir
pier, in a state of agricultural and pastoral sii^licitY
than in communities where commerce prevails, seen <io-
bave forgot that ** strength of mind U exermfit mi
rest;'* and that we enjoy a thousand conveniences and
elegances unknown to the untutored agric^lturbts et
Otaheite, or even the Western isles of Scotland.

» *

The merchant, indeed, whose whole life k s^t m
the bustlte of trade, has biit little time for refaction;
and^ however censurable his traffic may appear, perha^
bis business came into liis hands by hereditary succession,,
and consequently habit has reconciled him even to the
slave-trade. But, had he time to moralise, hb consci-
ous heart would tell him, that to communicate happmess
to the bosom of oppressed bumanity, would be of more
value than the freight of his bomeward-bound fleet; lie
would awake from hb golden drean^ of unreal felicity,
and burst those chains so long rivetted on the limbs of
men by hard-henrted Avarice.

Still, however, it will be found, that tlie cayUs of man-
kind against the business of the mei^<;hant originates.

TiUiet ifHenvy ^ his |ir08perily« than » desire to pronote
Ttrtiie. yfhexk tlie wisdom of our Legialatiue shall
abolisb the tnffic to Africa for ahives^* and when mono-
poljTslMlI^ )M«fent€d by restrictive laws, the merchants .
of this city will doobdess eoatimie to manifest their sup^
rioritytothose of every other nation^ and contribute veiy.
^ ^ W iu tiaHy to the general happiness of the community.

MANNERS OF THE GREAT.

Increase of pow'r begets increase of wealth i
. ' Wealthy InsoTjc i and laxnry* esocss : .
That seizes flrst tbe opulent, descends
To the next rank confagiouSt and in time
Taints downward all tliegradnated scale
Of order, flrom tbe cfiariot to tlie plough.

COW]|BR.

JPlato, speaking, of immorality» observes, that the-
moral intemperance of cities, and the corruption of
BUBnoers, originate in the bad example of others ta
youth; and when we reflect on the powerful influence of
the great, we must be convinced that the puUic mind
will ever be strongly biassed by their conduct.

* That inhuman traffic has bappilY been abolished. Majr
our merchants never again attempt to '^ carry trade ot the sword's'
lf»tit.% Of d'ife the wkittribe <fmn(K€9l eomm£fcialju$tice red."

' The.disfflpationwbkh|ibt<kily{>mvidi^
lilile world, but has fifHread tfaroagb aU nnhs, is^ ^e
ereatiire of female extiiiTQ^nee^^^esy maiiy 'Of chut la-*
dies of rank are at onee the* arbUresK^ qf-feshiof^, and
.^edissemmator^of folly, profasHMi, and licenti^asiiess!

.An emalatiDn te.outviecai^ other. ifispires the, gieat
and the . gay* Private theatres resound with the affect-
ing sonnets of nvanton love. By aii imitafion of the un-
blushing matrons of fashion, the blooming virgin soon
assumes a sufficient degree of confidence to participate
their orgies^: it is so'vulgar to be reserved,, or to have
the smallest respect for modesty or religion! And, O
how charming and spirited to whirl through theconvolu-
tions of a Scotch reel, as recommended by an arbttress of
vanity I'-^how noble to excel in equestrian exercises like
.Lady L***, our modem Diana! — and how decorous and
characteristic of maiden reserve to make the vaulted
roofs of ple'a:sure riesonnd the ear-fnerdog music ofthe
cymbal, so often practised and recommended by the
iuodest Mrs. B^****! -

A polite wifer observes,, that *' the utmpst of a.
woman's character is contaided in domestic life; she is
blameable or . praiseworthy according as her carriage
affects the house of her father or her husband. • AJl^she

^r»

has to do 111 thh wotid b contained within the dutie^ of
H daughter, a sister, a wife, and a mother;-^! Ihese
' may be performed, thongh a lady should not be the
very iirst woman at an opera or an assembly.'* These
precepts, however just, ar^ inimicat to' the pursuits and
sentiments of bur modem females. ' The Woman of
fashToia thinks it more spirited to overlook' the bounda-
ries* of moralify, and boldly participates the varied
amusements of the gaming-table, the tnasqutetade, and
all the gratifications of sense. What signifies the loss of
character, health, and beauty? — ^' Fatne, wealth; amd
h&noikr, tphat are you to pleasure T Nobly independ-
ent in principle, with passions ^stimulated by luxury, and
sanctioned m their iiidulgence by the glozing sophistiy of*
modern pkilasophisme, the illustrious fair-one emulates
the voluptuousness of the most luxurious dames* of anti-
qiiity. '

It miist be very mortifying, however, for persons of
qiiah'ty to see themselves outdone by the iipe^ of society.
For instance, a certain lady, loti^ celebrated for her
introduction of reels into the circle of fashiofn, and who
has snccessfiAly endeavouted to fender the heads of
young ladies gid^, finds that; ai^er all her laudable
exertions, she is excelled in agility and grace by an opera
^ dancer! — "*' JUweaved oMiiiavt, Mna much aft tkou

«0

^irmkr IftBHnlbtpitidifetoMaecty a^
ble desiie of the gpreal^ tD exoei io firivoloasacoMiiplisb-
meats, has been bat too «ften unsiiceeasfid. T^t pth
lishid and AamMnr Roman emperor, Nero, entered iotp
a competition witk buffoons and fiddlers; l^ut he was
obliged to reUnqnisb the puimit, . firom a consciousiiess of
bis inferiority of takntss and probably our yom^ ladies,
who now practise wanton dances and fessons <m tam-
bourines and cynboU^ will eventuaUy leave the cniltiva-
tion of those polite arts to actresses.

Bat wb^e private tiieatros and fttes are sanctioned by
the presence of tiie most dignified characters, it is vaun
to hope for a reformation of ftshionable mannfrs.7~
This absurd indulgence of vanity seems to antbprise and
enforce the necessity of yoong ladies being educated like
actresses; nay, at .the £^te of a p^son of qiiality^ a
numbor of our young nobility of both sexes ^tuaUyi
performed a farce for the entertaimnei^t of the conipany f
We are told by an eye-witness, that ** This fiiiiry jproup
rivalled the Opera-house and Drury-lane in correctness
and spirit. LadyC-^; — — • was wonderfiilly happy in
her character as a clo»%rol Hilligsberg had instructed
her to turn in her toes, and adopt awkward gesture^
wfaidi she r was so successful^ that a stranger coill
flcorcely have beUevlBd her to be sagracrful and accouf

«i

astdoiftedetiety one by h«r accurate perfornmnce of the

Vfif nuskT We liefe Me an aiiiiai>le yoang creoEtim*

div^i^ed of tiiait moiiesty whidi oatvite ialcsided to be

both lier omattieiif and defence, diagaMI ia the dres»

of Hie otbef sexf and even ber very manoeis and actions

asstimedf ^d tbie iiuf her she de|Mn1ed from ber natural

deRcacy by tfie successfal imitation erf vulgarity, the

more loud {find rdterated were the plaudits of those titled

GoTHAMiTBS, wbo disgraced both tiie <ligifity of her

sex and their own rank by their sanction of such abswr-

dity. The other young hidy who personated the old

man -with so inut*h cle^raess, nrast have been much im-

proved iit her ideas of decoram, and the respect due to

the aged. Venerable old age was once held sacred

atnotig us, btft it seems* to be tlie wish, nay, the ambi*

lieii, ' of the polite world to invert the ordei' of thii^s ; to

^ kttach ridtcube to the most meritorious charaeters;. and

hiiigh i^ith pleasurable glee at proprietyf virtue; and

religion.

tn order to pkce the irreiigion 6f persons of quality
ill a proper poimt of Tiew, let us eaijuhe iilto the princi-

^ pl^s i^stilied by a boardirtg-school education. Is not
the adornment of the person the ipnatkpf^ object? and

^'ivQuid not a £ishionable lady blui^ if sbe were caught

reading a BiUe^ or a Pmy/en-baok'?; Would sbe^ iiol Jade,
or iiiie4iwav tbe unfiusluonable Tolurae 1 But if tbe. ob-
ject of bev study, shoidd I^ppen to be a ^otbI orpbj^
she^wouldpreseotit to ber visitor witb a saa^ of jatis-
^aetiiin^ ... . .

Among othepproofft of solf-importaace, tbe c<m6deat
air : with yvhkiy hfgh-br^ ladies conteoif^te die. other
self ifk their moraiBgrambl^ is a sufficientindieatiQii of
their modesty. T^ apparent supe.rio4t;f of ckoiea^pour
mi^y be the. con^ipauion of purity of heso*^ but. few men
wo|iki>i3b to see their ^iyes . and daughters saaotering;
in the public walksy' half dressed^, and g^^iiitg at eveiy
man that passed..* The observant ^e can ea»ly di^m
affectatioti in . their.deportmentj, and the. studied adioetr
ment of their bght Qoyvyag rob^s. These caj^icioits fair-
oQes aff^ so, vatn, tjiat^ their ^es claim the homage of
every man they meet» and they se^m. dissatisfied if we
pass them without gratifying theirself-love by appax^nt
admiration.

Many of our grey-ioirrc? m^trpns.Ttxt ^^orsited with
st^h a profusion of prnameuts^ that they attract the
eye ; as the foliage, of the. trees in autumn exhibit a more
gauc^ variely. of^ tints :than evf a the fi^sh beauties of
sprmg* . .

l« »

B«tt it ts at ouriSieatresiKBttfteBiddifti&ir di^ptey-.
tbekchaiins t(Kinalt'ad?iiitage; ihetm tlwy imbiNif re-i ^
&ied - seiidbetits; and syiofMttiBse with such virtiioiis* *
M the aduftiesfles' aiid Unstering^lierde!! of
tathe tneKomtidnof their iA«rfli»! Io4eed;»
the prhseitml advantage tb bedenvedfrdnreiMi medelyk >
dniHias % that iioothiflg rdakation ivhieb they afford
the mitid. Wheft the fine lady returns home ia^oed
afler asaccesdtiD of unportantnbniingvisks, and the^
exhaustion of her vivid spirits^ in the useful employment
of tuinliling over'a maltitttde of 'silks, laces^ aad miis-t
lins; the sefectiont>fchina/dr cheapening of perAmieryy
how gratifying must be theamusemeni of the theaUie \^^ v
There die unwelcome visitor Reflectioii will not intrude^ . >
bu^'sntounded by admiren, the ^r idol may indulge
herfiney-in Iwferies of vanity. The' concatenation of
her MUme ideas will seldcMi be broken either by the
wittidsms of her attendant bcauX) or the drivellings of
liceirtiottsdess and dollaess^ sooftoen foM or «tt»^<»u
the stage.

If our ladies prefer the iktt^ or the masquerade,,
gaiety ' attends their steps; iind the- power of gold
throWs open every door on their apprdacfh« At tb^e
ama^ments they pasa the hours m a feverish atadi^m
between pleasure and pain, andvrtum home.in t^ndid

^liicks, fiitigiied and waimfipy. TkMnom dreftnn fill
np the raeanm of their, vanity; and evoj wacoeame
day pneteatoan -insqiid rouad <^8ifDiiar gfadficatioBS.'—
It Ibis frantic misapplioatioo of health, foitaa^ and
lime, agreeable to the States of lewoo, or the fediogs
of aeooscioQS heart? No: but who can siunmoB £»rti-
-tnde 'enough to hteak die magic chain of fashion, or
««ndoie the frantic veviliugs of a dissipated thioiig^ in-
Toivei in the chaiybdis of ^stravaganccl

It must be mor^fying to onr modem arbitresses of
"taste to reflect, that they hsfffe not even the merit of
:originaUtif in their amasements^ as every q[)ecies oT
excess in diess and intrigue have been formeriy ptactised
by Cleo|)atra, and other celebrated nymphs of antiquity.
'^There remains only one unexplored path by which oar
ladies may arrive at a degree of refioement which will
surpass the elegance of former ages. lislen, ye lovely
•directors of our amusements— listen to the voice of
prudence; let your dress» deportment, and conversar
tioD, be r^ttlated by the secret dictates of your natural
-delicacy, and no longer sacrifice your noblest feeGngs to
the slavish foppery of fiuhioo ; or rather, by your e»un-
ple, render it fashionable to be vhrtnous. Recal your
onisguided countrywomen to the path of deccNimi^ from
which so many of them have widely strayed :— now, alas!

yon muAt like benigiited' tniirell^n anik) the quagmires
of pieftsure, allured by the ignis faiwu of diasipatioo,
«Bd the next step may overwhelm you in the abyss
iDf infamy: — expend the treasure which' you now
lavish on fttes and other amusements^ in the institution
of public seminaries for the children ofthe indigent and
asylums for the proteetien of female-innocence.

If we wish to contemplate the insipidity of fishion*
able life» let us wit the squares and streets inhabited
by the nobflity and gentry* There coaches and
lacqueys attend before their doors every momii^ with
all the ostentation of pride.. • Footmen strut, proud of
the badges of their servitude, like the bird with bor-
rowed feathers. The clown, who was usefully^ em-
' ployed at the plough or cart in the country, is here
metamorphosed into a beau, and attends the steps of
his lady with an air of self-conceit. Perhaps a few
traces of his former rustic^ basbfulness yet remain, but
be wtil soon learn to suppiess bis feelings, and glory in
iis.progre2» in depravity.

The mamHons of the great may, indeed, be called
aeboois of: aflectation* There the waiting-maid iiukates
the.ridicttlous air» of her lady; and the valet astumes

tlie insolent zntboiity of his. master orer the neiua!
gradations of servility below him. Throogfaoiit those
receptacles of pride, no hospitable doc»r is opened to
admit the necessitous strapger-^no accommodatkms for
the weary sojourner — ^no shelter for the houseless wretch;
ail is formality and forbidding grandeur, while the so-
cial pasaons languish in lethargic torpor.

Let us tahe a cursory view of what is called a liberal
education, such as is generally bestowed on a youth
bom to the inheritance of titles and a large estate.
From his earliest years our young nobleman's wants are
administered to with servile attention ; he is not per-
mitted to learn *' one earthly thing cf use:" for how
is it possible that my Lord can ever be under the ne-
cessity of exerting his faculties ? The years of infancy
elapsed, he is committed to the care of a tutor, who
studies his disposition with a view to his own future
emolument, rather than the improvement of his pupil.
Hence, the youth grows up with a mind confu^ied by an
imperfect attainment of the learned languages, aiid his
person is improved by practising the gymnastic arts
usually taught in our public seminaries.

** We give some Latin, aod a smatch wi Greeks
Teacb bim to fence and figure twice a week;
And having done, we think the best we can,
praise his proficiency, and dub him — man.'

'The mituml transition from ichool is to college,
^iprhere, by the magic influence of gold, even the wrinkled
brow of philosophy is smoothed to complacency, and
learning greets him with smiles. Here the noble youth
lives at perfect ease : — some needy and ingenious yonng
student will gladly supply him with themes for a few
pieces; and while he receives the praise of ingenuity
ivithout exertion, he passes the pleasurable and inglo-
nous hours in dalliance with some frail fair-one, or at
the tavern or gaming-table.

Our Phaeton now ascends the chariot of his ancestors
with a determination to illumine the fashionable world.
Emulous to excel his youthful competitors in extrava*
gance, his dress, conversation, and demeanour, are under
the influence of affectation. The ladies give his mind
the finishing polish of polite education, by initiating him
in all the modish follies of the day. Those fair instruc-
tors, the female philosophers, teach their lively pupil to
deride religion as the old-fashioned superstition of our
fusty ancestors. He eagerly imbibes their sublime prin-
ciples, learns their peculiar phrases, and, as a reward,
4s received by the complacent smiles of beauty in every
fashionable circle.

He now keeps a mistress, and becomes a regular man
4>f fashion; or, in other words, he lives not in confor-

mity to the dictates of reasooy but under the capricious
influence of every change in dressi iaste^ or pfineipla^
however egregious, if sanctioned by the ladies.

During winter he riots in every species of indulgence
which the metropolis can afford, and he passes the sum-
mer at some fashionable watering-place.

It may be asserted by the moralist, that this mode of
life is at once abominable, and pernicious to society;
and that it would be more patriotic in men of fortune to
reside on their estates, and encourage agriculture and
manu£ictures among their tenantry. But though build-
ing and peopling towns and encouraging the arts were
considered as god-like achievements by the ancients, our
modem nobility in general are actuated by very diflerent
ideas. The turf» the ganung-table, and the brothel,
occupy the attention and drain the coffers of those who
prefer present enjoyments, however grovelling, to the-
reversiouary glories of farne^ or even eternal happiness !

But, perhaps, this apparent degeneracy of so many or
our nobility and gentry originates in nobler motives than-
mere self-gratification. Wisely reflecting, that if they
circulat(^d their money among their tenantry, the conse-
queoces might be iigurioas to agsicuhure, as the far-

'men might glow t<K> ridi and negkct their business* our
patriotic landholders draw the superfluous cash from
the country to promote the prosperity of the metropo-
lis. Thus they preserve the agricoltiiral body in health
and activity, as the sanity of the anknal frame is pro-
moted by insensible perspiration.

Having expatiated so long on the foibles of the disso-
lute part of our nobility, let us now turn our attentioD
to a more agreeable subject* and celebrate those who
are as conspicuous for <tfaeir virtues as they are iUustcioUs
Uy rank.

The virtues of generosity and valour, for which our
ancient nobihty were deservedly renowned, are not yet
extinguished among their successors, and the present
age has witnessed several instances of tlieir munificence
aiid patriotism.

Many of our nobility might be mentioned who are
entitled to praise for their public spirit and private vir-
tues ; but we must regret that the number bears a small
.proportion to that of the licentious.

Were persons of cjuality unanimous in promoting vir-
tue and decency* we might soon hope to see a favourable

cbaDge in tlie mannefs of the people.. Bet wLere af^
those magoaoimous individuals who will, with a noble
fortitude and self^ienial, begin the work of public lefor-
mation. by their example 1 Where is that gigantie mind,
that, rising superior to the derision of fashionable Tanity,
and contemning the childish vagaries of a disordered
imagination, wisely prefers the approbation of the
t)eity^ and the " mnakmt of the breast^'* to the fantas-
tic joys of effeminacy and profligacy?

Let such truly great minds shine on the world of
fashion like light rising out of chaos, and by their
brightness expose the deformity of vice and the misery
of dissipation. Such benign beings may yet, like minis-
tei;ing angels, cherish the good propensities of the human
heart, and convince the rest of our nobility, gentry, nay,
the whole community, that decency of dress and man-
ners, purity of heart, charity to man, and piety toOod,
only, can conduct mortals to the blissful regions of eter--
nal felicity.

DRESS.

H-er women insolent and setf-caress'd,
By vanity's un^vearied finger dressM ;
JPoi'^ot the blush that virgin fears impart
To modest cheeks',, and borrowed one i'rom art $

Were Jast^Qch trifief, witlnnit'werlh or aie^
As silly pride and idlencsv prodoce {
Currd, scented, farbelow'd, and flounced arannd.
With feet too delicate to toacli the ground »
They stretched the neck, and roird the wanton eye^
And 8lgh*d for every fool that flntter'd- by. .

. Such were the ladies of Jenufaleniy as described by a
sublime poet; but can tiieir levity, by a parity of cir-
cumstances, be applied to our more beautiful aud per-
haps more luxurious countryworoeA?

lo many respects the similarity is striking;, but we
might as well think to describe the various convolutions
and grotesque developernents of a cloud driven by the
wind, as to give an accurate description of the various
forms assumed by fashion. Every gradation of hue has
been suecessively exhibited to allure the beaux. When
we behold the roost beautiful female forms gli«ling in
our public walks, robed in white, and with the most
lovely necks decorated with chains of gold — apt emblem
of their power of captivatioo — we can scarcely forbear
exclaiming, " Really, ladies, this is too much to attack
us at once with the united attractions of gold and beauty,
the two most powerful objects of man's desire ; for pit/a
sake divest yourselves aC those glittering chains, and

decently cfNoncal those' bosoms iviiicii siMmld * iiiit be
exposed to the poblk gase T

Bat lessons of pradence are beneath the attention of
our titled damesi, whose flowing robes, of a teiiture unfit
to resist the slightest shower, are at once typical of their
understanding, and a pro<^f of their refined taste. Their
fair tresses have been sacrificed on the altars of fesbioD,
or concealed like masked batteries beneath their head-
dress. The Circassian sleeve, the nnzoned waist, the
pendent woilcbag instead of pockets, and that preposte-
rous custom of conceiiling the purse in the bosom, pre-
sent such a combination, of jdbsurdity and indecency to
the feeling mind, that we afe ready to controvert the
fact 9 and cxcJaim, jore iheee (kings so^

A fair 'morali^,* who is as emulous to promote the
happiness of her sex as the vain-glorious slaves of fashicui
are to excel 4n frivolity, thus animadverts on tltcdress
of our ladies: — ** The unchaste costume, the impure
style of dress, -and 4hat indelicate statue-like exhibition
• of the female ^ure, which, by its artfully disposed
4blds, its seemingly wet and adhesive drapery, so defines
the:.forni as tofn-event covering itself from becoming a
veJi;*' This licentious mode, as the acute Bfoutesquieu

* Miss HaDub More.

*db«efT^^ oti Ae daoon of the Sfitrttii wgiosy 1u»
taught us '* to 9trip ckaaWy iiieifof modeBty." Thk
elegant satirist is certaioly too severe ; for much benefit
may be derived from tlie dress of our fashionable fe-
males ! Let us only reflect on the rapid improvements
^which will be made in the fine arts, while such perfect
modeb present themsehres to the observation of the
artist. The liberal, nay, profiise display of their bi hu-
-tiesy with which our modish dames and virgi ts gratify
-the eye in the public walks and theatres, will doubtless
iiiipro\'e the imagination of the poet, the painter, and
the sculptor. The elegant symmetry of form for wirich
out countrywomen are celebrated, is exhibited by the
light transparency of their flowuig raiment, so as 1o pre-
.sent the most exquisite beauties shining like a constella-
tion to irradiate the path of genius ! With what accu-
racy may the artist depict those graces which eomrt the
eyt! How infinitely superior are those tmimated origir
n^h of feminine perfection, which communicate the
most distinct and delightful ideas . of /orm, Ave, and
motwn, when compared with the UHanimated beauties
of even the Venus of Medici! Rejoice, ye men of

•

genius! beauty will aid and patronise your efibrts; our
modem Phrynes and louses, our gay matrons, even the
delicate graces of the shame-faced virgin, «re presented
to your keen inspection by. the liberality of fashion.

Nor is this vsiiity of dress and depoiimeiit cci^^
ottt women of rank. The wives and daoghteis of aor
gentry and merdiants, nay, of onr shopkeepeis. wbA
mecbanicsy are a^perfectly siniyar as circumstanees will
permit.

Among t£e different inventions for the- convenience of
the ladies, the wig is perhaps the greatest improvement
ever adopted* We have only to regret, that, like other
temporary advantages, it will probably soon be sacri-
ficed to some other whim of fashion*.

This be^utifid ornament was doubtless suggested by
some fair philosopher, whose lucubrations were devoted
to the happiness of her sex ; and though some fastidious
mortal may object to it as indelieate, it has many advan-
tages overihe natural hair*

It prevents the inroads of vermin which annoyed the
belles when high heads and hair^powder were the ton, —
Besides, it is a great saving of that time which is so pre-
cious to the ladies in thb age of philosophic research. A
lady can now take off her bead m a moment, place it
upon her toilette, and replace it next morning in a few
seconds. In hot weather the wig is very convenient to
ladies who are naturally &o^74<?a£fei/, and are apt to per-

\
\

^^^"^^iie fmij, as thqr nay take off their hcad-draflttttlia
^'^^Pftblic street^, and refiigerate their bare polb by mbbiog
'^ 'fbem gently with a handkerchieL

The superior^ of the wig over the natural hair at
masquerades must be obvious, as is changing dresses,

<- '^ ' iirigs of diffinent colours may be used in personating dif-
: lerent characters. In sitting for their portraits^ too, the

- ladies find that wigs facilitate the progress of the artist.
Ijady Levitt^, so well known for ingenious devices,
actually left her wig with an eminent portrait painter the
other morning, and put on another which she had brought
in her pocket, and which served to decorate her head
for the remainder of the day !

In compliance with the mode, those latiies who are
favoured by nature with beautiful locks, submit them to
the scissars of the bair-dresser, and uot only pay him for
his trouble, but generously present him with the spoil,
which be manufactures inta a wig for some bald-pated
dame of quality.

On a general survey of the dress of our ladies, and,
indeed, of females of every class, they seem universally
to agree with a witty female writer, who asserts that
" if U wet^e the fasAion to go naked, the face would

hardiy bp obiervedf' and if they continoe to undress b
<pr<^rtioQ as they have done for some tune past, we
may expect to hehold them tuning in liie unveiled effbl-
genee of natural beauty!

^Tbat the ladies, however, have not totnlly relin-
quished all ideas of modesty, is evident from tbetr liber^
use of the parasol and the veil. The parasol may be
denominated the modem iig-leaf, which conceals the
beaiities of 4he fair, who have ingeniously contrived to
make 1t^ very formidable weapon. When that elegaut
class of society the fops contemplttte the varieties of
female beauty with as much pleasure as ever ftorists did
a favourite carnation, the modest maiden is screened
from tbeir pryiog-eyes by the intervening parasol. Oil
the otlier hand, the coquet can render this little imple-
ment not only attractive, but dangerous. By \ariou8
motions she can first allure her beau, on his aj^roacb
she may conceal her face, or if she is determined to
make an entire conquest she may suddenly remove her
parasol, and break out-upoh him in the irresistible spki-
dpur of beauty, like the sun from behind a cloud. In-
deed, the fair sex seem well convinced of the power of
this engine. Nor are the seductive atlfacti<His of the
veil unknown; for, strange as it may appear, the very
emblems of modeisty itself are metamorphosed into tbe

most powerfbl anxilkiks of galhntiy by our modern
fine ladles t

When winter compels our pedestrian beauties to re-
sume the muff and the tippet, they very judiciously con-
trive to .render these comfortable appendages useless, by
the thinaesB of the rest of tbeir dress.. A Portuguese or
Spaniard, on his first arrival in town, might conjecture
that our fine women were penitents, whom the priest
had punished ior some peccadillo, by obliging them to
wear mufis, to keep the hand and Unter part of the arm
warm, while the upper part of that elegant limb was
exposed to the frigorific influence of the season.

Our ladies,, indeed, seem to be adepts in the art of
decoration; and„, like the painter, have studied the
power of contrast,, by an artful distribution of light and
shade. This is evident, from their skilful display of
formidable curls pn the polished forehead; and the
august dignity which their soft charms derive from the
furs of different ferocious animals^

In one respect, however, they seem sadly deficient,
for neither time nor experience can convince them that

*'*' The maid ivho modestly conceals
Her beauties, wbiht sbe hides reveali.
.Give but. a glimpse^ aiid fancj draws
Whatever the Greciao Veuus waa."

Th^ stfll .perset^re in fhe display of tfaeirpersonSj is
spite of the animadversions of satire. But perhaps this
proceeds from conscious innocence; and every bloom-
ing — ^painted or unpainted — charmer would wish, if it
were possible, that she had ^ window in her breast to
•exhibit bee most secret thoughts. Still, bowev^r, the
moralist has reason to suspect, Ax>m' the sigoificant
glances, the artful gestures, and wanton attire of beau-
tiful women in their perambulations through the street$p
that licentionsness is the directress of fiashion.

All the enchantment of feminine trharras is eyaneseent
as the resplendent rainbow that swells its magnific arch
in the majesty of light! The most delicate comple:xion,
the most animated bloom that smiles in tlie richness of
youthful luxuriance on the polished cheek, and the fair
fight that emanates from the eyes of beauty, must lan-
guish and expire f But, though the lilies and roses of
love must fade, the mental charms of modesty, sincerity,
and virtuous love, are immortal.

We shall now recommend to the attention of the ladies
-A sentiment of onr sweetest poet:

Beauties in vain their pretty eyes may roll ;
Churms strike the sense, but merit wins the sold I

FEIiAtE EDUCATION.

'*Ti» l^ranifd, and no plainer troth appears.
Our moat important are oar earliest yean:
The mind, impressible and soft, with ease
Imbibes, and copies what she hears and sees?
And throagb life's labyrinth holds fast the clao
That iA t eati m gives heri false or ime.

COWPKB.

Paradoxical as it may appear, we are at tliis moment
'3issailed by vice under the guise of refinement, and the
morals of the people are vitiated at their source by the
improper education of females. It is the duty of every
patriot to watch over those amiable young creatures on
whose virtue the honour, safety, and happiness of the
community so essentially depend ; and to preserve them
from the pestilential contagion of vice, which now
blights the first bloom of their mental beauties. The
following letter from an indulgent but disappointed
:parent, will illustrate this :

SIB,

I am a widower, and the chief pride and delight of
iny life would be my two daughters, were they endued
with discretion. But, alas ! all my fond hopes have been
blasted, by giving them a fashionable education.

Being an opalent mercbant, I resoWed to spaux no
expence in the instructioirof my children. Accordingly
when the eldest, whose name is Mary, had attained the
age of ten years, and her sister Elizabeth nine, I visited a
distant female relation, who kept a boarding-school in a
village adjacent to the metropolis, and proposed to place
my daughters luder her care. Mrs^ MamlLastored me
that the greatest painsr should be taken to render them
accomplished.

In a few days I accompanied my blooming chembs to
the I* oardiug -school^. and afterwards in my occasionai
visits I had reasoo to be pleased with their progress in
the French language, music, and similar accomplish-
ments, which are now considered as indispensable. I
thought, however, that I perceived a mixture of levity
in their manners, and expostulated with Mrs. Marall. —
She lulled ray appfeheusions, by saying, **■ My dear sir,
you may rely on my attention to the morals- of yoor
daughters — my school has long been celebrated for de-
corum, nris true, I have several young ladies of distinc-
ti >n entrusted to my care; and you know, cousin, we
' must hot he too austere with persons of quality, v\ ho
allow Ibemselves a greater latitude of action than would
be proper for people ot^ interior rank." " Madam/' re-
plieu J, " no station can sanction levity,, and 1 rtquest

tbat my da|ighten may not be permitted to imitate the
follies which you think pardonable in high life/' *' Coa-
sin,'' xejoined she, in a soothing tone, 'Mhe morals of
your girls shall be preserved like jewels; they shall be
consigned to their worthy father pure as innocence itself.''

When my daughters had continued five years under
the care of their preceptress, I conducted them home. —
Theu' education had cost me upwards of a thousand
pounds, and I was delighted with their proficiency in
polite attainments. But though their gentility of de-
portment, and easiness -of manners, were admirable, I
looked in vain for that angelic smile of simplicity which
had (Mice played on their lips, and glistened in their eyes;
. nay, I remarked a passion for finery, which appeared to
originate in pride ; but I forbore expostulation during
the first evening after their return home, lest they should
be terrified at any appearance of austerity.

Next morning after breakfast I desued my footmaa
to attend them when they shq^ld be disposed to walk. —
In the course of the morning I had occasion to pass
through St. James's-park, where the fine weather had
invited a numerous assemblage of polite pedestrians. —
Although I was delighted with the beauty and gaiety of

several groupes of young ladies, f could net ^upprefss a
-sentinaelit of pity, oh obserriog the verjindecent maimer
in which they were attired. But What appeared still
more censurable was, their haughty demeaftour, and the
satisfkction with which they seemed to enjoy the homage
of the men as they passed.

I entered into conversation with a gentleman, and ex-
pressed my disapprobation of the licentiousness of
fashion; he replied, ** Your observations are just, but
what can the poor girls do? they must dress and behave
like others, or they will be entirely neglected.'^ While
we conversed I beheld two young ladies approach, dres-
sed in tlie light drapery of the f^it, abd attended by a
servant. They stepped together with the most sprightly
air, and often varied their posture to^ excite the atten-
tion oi others. I contemplated the levity of these young
creatures with secret pity; but what was my astonish-
ment to find that they were my own daughters! They
blushed, appeared disconcerted at this unexpected meet-
ing, and proposed to accompany me home.. The gen-
tleman with whom I had been convershig, w^ a signifi-
cant smile, wished me a good morning, and I left the
public walk, overwhelmed with shame and sorrow, at
the indiscretion of my children.

I expostulated inth my dear girls on the improfuriety
of their conduct. Theyassured me that they had been
taught to dress according to the fashion, and thought it «
no crime to apf>ear like others*. While I expatiated <mi
the inddicacy of young tiigina being habited Ifte women
of the town, and the folly of supposing that tiiey would
gain admirers by walking the stn^ets half-naked, they
appeared to feel the force of conviction. Their dress is
now perfectly genteel, modest, and becoming, yet I per*
ceive with infinite regret that the seeds of levity sown by
a boarding-school education will scarcely ever be eradi-
cated. My lovely girls have, indeed, eaten the fruit of
the tree of knowledge, and, like Eve, have thereby lost
their primitive simplicity.

I am, &c.

Prudentius.

From the pernicious tendency of excessive refine-
ment, as described by Prudentms, it is evident that
our public seminaries are imfm)perly conducted. — ^Nor
is the private education of females among the higher
classes more productive of felicity. Even from her
iuduncy, the young lady is habituated to the unrestrained
gratification of her most capricious whims' — praised,
idolized! — in this ungovernable state of petulance she
proceeds with little advantage through the usual grada-

tions of education* Masters attend to teach bet dif-
ferent languages ; she acquires a smattering of eadi;
and, like the swallow, just sips the surface of the stream,
and flies off to some more alluring object The lighter
female accomplishments of dancing, music, and drawing,
are the principal objects of her attention, and her per-
sonal charms are cultivated, with such solicitude, that the
very air of heaven is not suffered to visit .her face too
roughly.

When perfectly accomplished, this charming -creature
is introduced to the fashionable world, where her . beau-
ties emanate like the first rays of morning, to the delight
of the admiring beaux. She enters the temple of Af-
fectation with a palpitating bosom, but her fears soon
subside, and she, participates the varied pleasures of the
ball, the fete, and the masquerade, with^ much ,glee as
the Duchess of -herself. Gratified by the "^ful-
some flattery and flippant wit of the titled coxcomb,- the
beautiful . tj/ro feels an emulation to obtain universal
adftiiration, and learns to wield the sonorous cymbals
with all the.' agility andrgrace imaginable. Those brazen
emblems of female modesty must be highly conducive
to the harmony of polished society, and enable the fair
performer^to suppress the small remains of. bashfulness,

■

,sQ Jucommodious in high life.

Such accomplishments are doubtless considered by

our modish ladies as indispensable, especially if they

hope to rival the actresses, and rccal the ^vandering

hearts of those lovers who are attracted by theatric

graces. Our men of fashion, indeed, have tlie example

oi English peers to countenance their attachmeot to

the beauties of the green-room; and we may expect, if

the mania continues, to see those heroines transplaced

from their fictitious greatness into the superb mansions

of our nobility, to preside over the vailing freaks of

vanity and extravagance.

But it is among the middle classes that the effects of
mismuanaged boarding-schools are most severely felt;^-
The ambition of parents to see their children exalted oc-
casions them to lavish that money on superfluous accom-
plishments, which would have been much better applied
to purchase more solid benefits. The wives of mer-
chants and tradesmen, viewing the infantine graces of
their daughters with maternal deligbt,^ vainly think that
to initiate them in modish quah'fications, will be their
certain exaltation, if hot to a title, at least to a higher
rank in society than that in which they have been bom.

For this purpose miss is entrusted to the governess of
a boarding-school,. Bind noreeruit ever suffered more on

drill than ^ is obliged to tmdergo^ Hex fomis moBld-
€d according to the correct ideas whieh her imc^ytnss
has of grace ; she is taught to lodk, sit, move, and sfieA
by mle ; and to Tphy npon lariout instninents c^ nmBiC,
dance and speak French, by masters whose insignificance
is only eqnalled by their adalati»fy ittperdnenee.

Unaccustomed to the conversation of men af sense,
the poor girl soon imbibes the flippant nonsense of her
teachers, and should any of those coxcombs happen to
be an agreeable man, an intrigue is probaUy commenc-
ed with his pupil, which terminates in an elopement.

The ffhtery ^f Mm fVentwarth.

' When the ^k^pping^apt was first inlpodnced at a
boarding-school for yonng ladies, near London, Maria
Wentwortfa, a fine sprightly girl, aged fifteen, was am-
bitions to excel her school-fellows by snperior agility
and grace, in that species of amnsement. Maria eonld
swing the skipping-rope backwards, fiuwards, or traos-
T(^rseiy, with inimitable dexterity, and her health was
iin))ro\'ed by the exercise; bnt she lost «dtat delicate
sensSPtion of modesty which formerly suffused her beaq-
tifiii iaee hmi the stiglilest occaiaoji. She gfew more con-
fideat^ «nd, xharmed by the rnddlation of her dancing-

vmt»h ikn becaioe die ni^im of delusion, This
^Ifmtch, whose n^tne wa9 JNT^nsel, w^ the pander t)^ n
joiing nobtemWy And practised on the credulity of un-
thinkiiig gjiris in tbe diffemit lepuiiaries iq which be was
•^gxplayed. H^ bad loog ^tqess^ the vivacity -of Miss
WentworU)» but did not att^pipt to seduce her, till she
l>ecanie ?l sJcipping-gtrl. From that monieot he resolves
to prpfit by her imprudence}

Maria commonly amused' herself with b^r fevouiite
-7ope in the garden belonging to the boarding-school,
9nd one delighted morping ia Septemberj when Mansel
caipe to tench her 9 lesson^ be found her in a retired

iyifdilk, tripping along with all the playfulness of a Grace.
He praised tbe fresh glow which beautified her i:hee]^
and the spirit that sparkled in h^r eyeS| from the salu-
brious ^ects of ei^ercUe ia the opeq air, and hinted
that she bad piade a conquest of a noble lord. Maria
blushed, ber heart palpitated* but jtbe plausible fale of
her deceiver soothe^ her apprebeffsienSf She consented
to indulge lier admirer with an interview; be came at
the time ^^ppointed, and breatbed 1^ rhapsody of tender
iKuisense, sucb as she had ofVen m^t with in novels, but
bad never before beard frpm tlie lips of a lover. In a
few days she ^oped with Lord y*****, who having no
object but sensuality 19 view, first led his mistress through

tbe fantastic round of illusory pleasures, and then tUmt-
doned her to want, iniamy, and despair? When Maria
reflected on the former innocence and happiness of her
life; the tenderness of her parents and friends, whose
esteem was for ever lost; and the sweet society of her
amiable inmates, who now regretted her absence and
exclusion; she became frantic, and in that deplorable
state was conveyed to a receptacle of the insane, where
she now remains absorbed in melancholy, a sad monu-
ment of female indiscretion.

Such are the beneficial consequences of an indulgence
in those modish amusements, the skipping-rope, and
the tambourine, so highly recommended as conducive to
the health of our youthful females. Those young ladies
who now so egregiously prefer an imitation of the wanton
contortions of a painted actress, to the modesty and-
good-nature which can render them tnily charming,
ought, as a warning against levity and seduction, to re-
member the fate of poor Maria Went^vorth.

Is there a father or mother feelingly solicitous fbr the
future honour and happiness of their daughter, who
would entrust her into one of those modern temples of
affectation, called boarding-schools ? No; rather let
tl|e loveliest part of our a|>ecie& be educated at home.

8Sr

Beneath a motiier's guardian eye; or if the mother be-
incompetent to the task, let a modest preceptress in-,
struct the blooming girl beneath that paternal roof
'Where seduction will not presume to appear under the
assumed name o{ refinement. This mode of education
will preserye the morals of the virgin, and be particiH
laily useful and practicable among those in the middle
classes of society ; as girls can not only n^ake a regular
progress in useful and omamenhd knowledge, whictt
renders even beauty more amiable, but they may also be
initiated in those easily acquired arts of domestic eco*
ndmy peculiar to their sex. Thus the daughters of shop-
keepers can occasionally assist in the sale of goods, and
at once learn an useful and profitable busmess, while
they repay the ^res of their ]|yarents, by grateful exer-
tions for iheir mutual welfare, at the same time that
-home may 'be considered as a sanctuary, where the de-
mon vice can have no influence.

By the present preposterous ambition to educate
young women of the subordinate classes with the profu-
sion pf those in the highest ranks, many girls are utterly
disqualified to fiil their place and perform (heir duties in
society, and in a manner prepared for seduction !

An elegant young woman,, long accustomed to the
homage of a irain of coxcombs, will expect similar

^|ei»tm from h«r busbandL and feel ber pii<)e morfK
tied wbeo «he findi henelf tr^ted «s a mere womao. —
From the fiivolity of her inlad, she is not possessed of
that iQodest dignity fo t^sseatial to command tbe esteeni
t>f her partner ;'^heQ€e bickerings, jealopsiesy and often
mutual infidelity, terminated by a separation.

Good sense is as much superior to the levity ^f wit n^
the light of the sun i» to th^ momentary glare of a
meteor ; and an accomplished female mind i? infiiut^y
more>estimable in the eyes of reflecting men tb4n those
exhibitions of feminine charms obtruded on our fancy by
fashion. Su<:h beautiful creatuies as glide along the
streets, decorated in sljowy apparel, may amuse the pas-
senger; but would he wi^ to see his wife in the loose
attire<of a womanof the town? Then let us discoun-
tenance this violaUon of pqblic decency, so abominable
to the virtuous mind, and endeavour to persuade the fadr
sex, that modesty aud purity of manners are the true
ornaments that render their beauty at once amiable .and
inestimable.

EDUCATION OP YOUTH,

AcceBi|»lifiiiBetit6 bave taken Tirtae^s pla^e.
And wtsdon falk before exttrimt ptmoBf
A jest deportment, maoaers graced wijb ease*
Elegant phrase, and figure form'd to please.
Are qualities that seem to comprehend
Whatever parents, guardians, sctmols intend :
Hence an nnfurnish'd and a listless nind i —
Though busy, trifling { empty, though refinM.

la cQptemplatiog tb« importaiicf of education, and

^ts influ^oe on the present and future happiness of man,

the mind is warnaed with philanthropic enthusiasm. We

i[>ehold the docile youth .pass in review, with lively minds,

ivhidi, like gemunattng plants, require the skill of the

-experienced to prune their luxuriance, and direct their

-^owth. We hehold their passions ready to rebel against

the authority of their sovereign reason, which is yet in

its infancy, unable to restrain them, and looking to us

for aid. Their untaught and unsophisticated minds are

Jike simj^ water, equally susceptible of the rich tincture

tif virtue, or the rank infusion of vice. They seem to

look up to us with an eye of supplication, and to cry

-Emphatically — Who will skew us nny good? — Who wiH

direct us how we may become the omaments, and not

the disgrace, of our nature tmd our nation 1

The youth of all the hi^er and middle classes is
aociety have a manifest advantage over those in a lower
station, yet it will be found that; in consequence of in-
judicious management, they derive little benefit from
contingent circumstances. The indulgence of infimtine
caprice, so prevalent in this metropolis, is one great
source of folly and vice. From a- ridiculous affectation
of tenderness, many mothers lay the foundation of the
future obstinacy of their sons, by gratifying their child-
ish passions. Such falsely good-natured beings vrili
exclaim, " I cannot bear to make my child unhappy,
even for a moment; poor fellow, he will have trouble
enough when he grows up — sorrow will come too soon.*^
This absurd idea is very common among parents, who
imagine their children will be taught tiie r^ulation of
their passions by experience.

Boys are indulged, lest severe restrictions should
break their spirit,, and render them timid : hence they
become assuming and impudent, and on their entrance
into life are like a luxuriant tree, whose superabundance
of branches and foliage prevents it from producing any
good fruit, till the severe hand of experience lops its
redundancies.

How irrational are those parents who permit their
sons to attain maturity, with only a few fashionable-

:93

'aco»iiplishiiieiit9!---They step into life with all thcdr
passions and desires in fiiU vigour; wheie, impatient of
contradiction, and unaccustomed to control, they are

-often involved in embarrassments and quarreb. In-

chanted by the smile of pleasure, the giddy youth reveb
in her illicit enjoyments, -Faseinated by public amuse-
ments, and misled by dissolute companions, he pursues

'the phantom of happiness without reflection. The
stews, the gaming-table, and the tavern, consume his
health and fortune; till ruined, emaciated, and for<

• saken, the wretch is kit to pine in hopeless deapond-

>ency; or, unable to meet his naked heart alone, he
teitninates his vain-glorioas career by suicide! Such,
alas! are too often the fruits ofan in^)tQper or imper-

-iect. education.

Under the head "'Manners of the Great,"- we have
' taken a cursory view of what is called a liberal educa-
tion : let us now investigate the mode of instruction
usually pursued with children of the lower classes. The
sons of tradesmen are generally taught a smattering of
Latin, which they seldom' find of any real utility during
their progress through life, while their morals are over-
Hooked, and the mind, .

*' Like a neglected forester, raos wild.''

Stilt more objectidotble is th« pieteiit cdirisitiOB ai
tbe children of mechanics. It being the pvi^pal object
of the schbol-master to increaae the number of his pupils,
at the same time that lie i» disqualified for the unportant

dbarge, both from hb ignoranee of human natuiey attd
his imperfect knowledge of the elements of science.

We often hear parents complain that their children m
a few months forget ail that they had learned at ^hool ;:
the fact is,' they had learned nothing except a smatter-
ing of grammar and arithmetic; and the principles of
these useful sciences had been impr^ied so feebly on
their memories, that, like the visions of the night». they
were forgotten with-the return of more vivid objects*—^
Many school-masters are shamefully negl^nt in the iih
eulcation of the first principles of religion ^d morality^
and commonly leave that most important branch of in-
struction to the mans^ement of a vain and irreligious
usher. Such are the most obvious defects in some of
our seminaries ; let us now suggest a few improvements*.

The law formerly made to prevent the growth, of
popery, which required that every teacher of youth
should he authorised by a licence from tiie bishop of the
diocese, might he revived as a check to the alarmiug
spread of immorality and infidelity. By a revision of

Has luvF, ei^ jMstDf might Hot ^y be enit)OW^y^» but
obliged to grant such licence, after havinif pl^Hottftly
scrutinised the abilities and character of every schooN
master and schoolmistress in his parish. No prohibi-
tion, however, ought to be issued against Christian
teachers of any denomination^ We have so many avow*
ed enemies in those deisb and atheists who arrogate to
themselves the name of philosophers, that we should co-
operate in the general promulgation of the great truths,
of the gospel.

To limit either religion or science within the pale of
any particular sect, is. derogatory to that sublime
brotherly love enjoined by Christ. Let the future com-
petition »nong Christians be, who shall do most to pro-
mote the universal happiness of mankind. This simple,
benign, and godlikv principle of charity will more ef-
fectually suppress inunorality, and counteract the iA-
sidious paradoxes of infidels, than the pen of satire, or
the sword of justice.

Young clergymen would be the most proper instnic-
lors of youth. Being well-taught themselves, and com-
ing fresh from classic ground, with their faculties invigo-
rated by polite learning, they are fully competent to the
task of inculcating* knowledge ; and from their pre])drd!-

;tory stady of ethics, tlieyaie proper guardians of 4he mo-
rals of others.

"Men of genius would find ample room for their actire
minds to expatiate in tracing 'and aiding the develope-
ment of the human understanding. Nor will any man of
sense object to the avocation, who will take the trouble
to recollect that some illustrious writers have presided
over youth as masters and assbtants in academies. —
Milton, Johnson, and Goldsmith, ** jwured the fresh
instructian o'er the mind:;*' nor can we rationally con-
•sider that employment as a degradation of talents, which
codtributes so essentially to the diffusion of knowledge.

When the pupil has been initiated in the elements of
useful science, and while the susceptible heart throbs
with generous feelings, the beauty of morality should be
exhibited in the most engaging garb. The simple and
sublime preceptsof Cliristwill awaken tliat benevolence
which 4s ti«e source of human felicity on earth.' The
tutor will have an opportunity to contrast the fanciful
doctrines of the heathen with the elevated and godlike
dignity of Christianity, and the unerring precept, " what-
soever ye would that all men should do unto you, do ye
even so unto tbem,'' will, by making an early and per-
manent impression, guide the happy being .in the path
of justice.

Elegant literature, such as poetry, history, biography,
uud natural philosophy, may be studied with success. —
With a mind thus imbued with divine and human know- *
iedge, the youth when he steps into the worid will feel
and act up to the dignity of a rational being. He will
be a column at once to adorn and strengthen the fabric
of society ; he will perceive his dignified situation in the
order of created brings, and rejoice in the honourable
privileges of a man and a Christian.

This Sketch is submitted to the consideration of the
middle and lower classes of the community, whose very
imperfect mode of education requires improvement,
especially as many of the 8<!hool-masters are incompetent
to a trust on which so much of the happiness of the pre-
sent and future generations depends! Happy, thrice
happy, would London soon be, if those miserable chil*
dren who are now taught the arts of deceit and thievery,
were taught to read and write, and bad their minds early
fortified with pious precepts, to enable them to resist
the influence of evil communications.

The human soul comes, pure and innocent from the
hand of its holy Creator ; by its union with the body it
acquires propensities which, under proper regulations.

are productive of good ; wliik its exquisite susceptihiiity
renders it liable to leceive continual impresaons from
«ufroundiiig objects. Hence tke vast importanee of oor
infantine ^ears» and the necessity of the early and gra-
teal inculcatio&of the moral duties.

Parents, look around! behold the little bloomii^
creatures whom Providence has committed to yotir
charge. Ah, cultivate their hearts, rectify tb^ jadg-
ments, and their grateful reverence will reward your
love I Do not imagine that your duty ta your offspiing
is ^onfmed to su]!^ying them with mere necessaries.
That is, indeed, indispensable ; but thek minds reqaire
a much more important kind of nutrimeot. Instil pie^
to God, and love to mankind, as the two great prkh
ciples of human felicity. Teach them to regard the

, jA'hole creation as the production of one great and good
Being, wliose wisdom is unbounded. As their faculties
expand, let them be imdat«d in the principles of usefol
science, and tat^t some aft conducive to the commoQ

^ p:ood. Then shaU your daughters be celebrated for
their modesty and virtue, and your sons become honest,
industrious, and intelligent men, the glory of their
parents, and an honour to their country.

CLERGY,

T venerate the man whose heart is warm,
Whose hands are pure, whose doctrine and whose life,
Coincident, exhibit lucid proof f

That he is honest in the sacred cause. Cow per.

Long have the various opinions respecting religion,
tind the sanguinary persecutions of men who caUed
themselves Christians^ employed the sarcastic wit of th«
unbeliever. The luxury, pride, and negltgence> of
many of our modem clergy, has induced malignant in-
fidels to point their ridicule against the \vhole clerical
body; and though it must be confessed that the dissipa-
tion of some pastors is a degradation of the robe they
wear, yet we can boast of many clergymen of the dif-
ferent, sects of Christians who are ornaments cf human
nature.

Several of our benefice clergymen, indeed, by era-
ploying curates at a low salary, seem to think that their
proxies are like the niilitary, better disciplined, and
more attentive to tlieir duty, in proportion to the small-
ness of their pay. Hence the curate is so far from
being prepared for his sabbatical avocation, that he is
often engaged during the week in some worldlv pursuit,
for the subsistence of his family ; and instead of the

100

a
%

zeal he should feel for the happiness of his flock, be toa
often attends on Sunday merely as an hireliiig» and with
a mind pre-occupied with business.

But if the Reverend Doctor himself condescends to
preach, his parishioners must doubtless be much edified..
And so they would, did he not substitute afiectation for
simplicity, and a few sweet-sounding aphorisms, equally
refined and unintelligible, instead of the perspicacious
and affecting doctrine of Christ.

Such pastors are well ponrtrayed by the satirist in the
foliowiug lines;

" The things tbat mount the rostrum wit& a skip.
And then skip down again ; pronounce a text ;
Cry-w-hem; and, reading what they never wrote.
Just fifteen minutes, huddle up their work;
And with a well-bred whisper close the scene T*

Yet even these fashionable and flimsey orators are
pardonable, compared with the avaricious pluralist, who
combines the deceit of the hypocrite with tlie covetous-
ness of the miser, while his meanness reflects an odium
on our boly religion.

Some clergymen go still farther, and convert the
sacred avocation into a sinecure. A recent instance.

101

iiewever« basoccunedy in which this shameful omissioa
bas been punished : we ace informed by the public pa-
pers, that at the last Summer Assizes, held at Durham,

the Rev. Mr. W ^ vicar of that city, was fined ten

pounds « month for non-residence during the nine pre-
ceding months; though he was proved to be actually
i)uildiog a house for the purpose of residence.

Notwithstanding these negligences, the. Christian
church in this comitry can boast of many faithful cham-
pions. Men whose piety is embellished by genius, and
sanctioned by truth. Such is the elegant author of
*' An Apology for the Bible ;" such the bishop of this
metropolis, who unites the imagination of the poet, with
the understanding of the philosopher; and such the in-
comparable Paley, whose elegance as a writer, and
purity as a moralist, are equally worthy of eulogium.
There never was an era, since the establishment of Chris-
tianity, when its enemies appeared so numerous, or so
audacious; and when peace, that precious gift of Heaven
shall be restored to Europe, it will require the combined
exertions of our divines and moralists to counteract the
influence of French philosophy.

Think then, ye ministers of the gospel, on the im-
portance of your sacred trust; beware, lest you im-

102

iDingte the leaven of human prejudice wiA the bread of
life. Instead of hoiding up the particular tenets of any
sect of Christians as exclusively excellent, imitate the
Saviour of inan, ivho commanded his disciples to love
one another.

View yourselves in the true light, merely as agents of
your divine master, authorised by his word to distribute
the fruit of the tree of life to his household, and pre-
pared by a life of sanctity to preach his gospel, wfaidi is
able to make, us mae unta salvation. Under thisim-
{>ression of sanctified humility, and Christian charity,
the blessing of Jehovah will accompany your pious
labours in the cause of truth; and the animative inspira-
tion of his spirit will renovate the love of rdigiou in the
hearts of many who are misled by the ilhi»ons of infi-
delity, and the sophisms of atheism,

LAWYERS.

We must not make a scarecrow of the law.
Setting it up to fear the birds of prey,
Aod tet It keep one shape, till custom make it
Their perch, and not their terror.

Shakspeabe,

■

Among the various sciences, jurisprudence is entitled
to a conspicuous place. The complexity and fitness of

103

the law to abnost every case deserves the reverence of
the public. By its sablety, right and wrong can be se^-
parated oat of tbe chaos in which they are involved be-
neath the wig of a serfeant, or in the still more intricate
labyrinth of an attorney's brain ; nay, by the power of
eloquence, equity can be metamorphosed into iiyustice.

High-spirited people, instead of appealing to honest
neighbours as arbitrators of a dispute, wisely seek re-,
dress from the civil law, which very civilly disbarthens
them of their superfluous cash, leaving them to enjoy
the pleasing reflectioo, that they have effected the ruin
of one another. The litigious, dispontion has been stig-
matised by the«ame of oktftinacy ; bat, if traced to its
origin, it will be found to spring from benevolence ! Let
us only consider what a multitude of seijeants, coun-
sellors, attomies,. and their coadjutors the catch-poles,
would be destitute of employment did not their good-
natured countrymen contribute to their support by law-
suits.

Pope says, "All discord's harmony;" and donbtless
the apparent discord in our courts of justice is conducive
to the social harmony and happiness of numbers, whose
Ume is occupied by the litigations of others. Indeed
the p&triotic ei^ertions of our lawyers are wMwIeiful.

104

With what zeal do they es|K>a9e the cause of the dient^
not for the trifling customary fee, hot a godlike love of
justice! Our Court of Equity may be truly denomi-
nated the temple of Astrea, where tine lawyers, like
sacred priests, attend in solemn robes to dispense bef
blessings to the community. A foreigner, unacquainted
uith our laws, would feel the greatest veneration for
those excellent men whose depot-tmeut accords so well
with their innate integrity ; but how great would be his
astonishment, when informed, that the respectable jiKKly
was wholly supported by the folly and vices of their
countrymen; and that the pride and phrensy which sti-
luulates to litigation, enriched thousands of virtuous
men, who were educated' purposely to assist in the ad-
ministration of justice.*

But as tlie most sacred institutions are not exempted
from censure, it has been asserted that bribery misleads
even some of these advocates of equity. History indeed
affords a memorable instance of the fallibility of a great
lawyer. Lord Bacon pleaded against the unfortunate
£arlof £23$ex,"who had formerly been his patron; and

♦ The nunibej* of the Courts of Justicft in the metropolis
amouots to 01,; the Prisons 14; besides four Houses of Cor-
ruction, and the numtsej of persons employed in tfie difierent
departments of the law arc^stimatcd at lOjO.

105

be ^ivas ajfterwards degiaded from his exalted situatioa in
c<Hi9eqaeiKe of bribery and corruption.

Some attomies act in the double capacity of lawyers
and bankers. These ingenious gentle ineo, reflecting
that a man who is mad enough to go to law is incapable
of managing his own affairs, on the successful issue of a
suit, prudently lock up the money for the client's future
purposes.

Tliis excellent device is sometimes aided by coincident
circumstances. A person employed hb attorney to re-
cover a debt, which the latter effected, and appropriated
the money to his own use, amusing his client from time
to time with promises that the aflTair should be brought
to a ^vourable termination. Meanwhile the person
'died who had paid the debt, aud the attorney now
looked upon the cash as his own m reality ! The papers
of the deceased indeed discovered . the fraud, but, in
Tain, for who would enter a suit against an attorney 1

This solHaty instance of ingenuity, however, is inapr
plicable to that respectable class at large ;-»-for is not
the integrity of an attorney proverbial 1

Su|i€rstition in religion has given place to that worst
of mental diseases, infidelity: but the superstitions of

106

kvr and phyuc yet mamtaio fheir gnHmd. When wOt
quackeiy in both, that so often depme men of their
lives and fortunes — when will tl|ese gigantic evils be re-
moved from society? When mankind prefer tensper-
ance to excess^ and exercise to mdolenee, health will be
promoted. And when the natural beneficence of the
human heart is directed by prudence, men will not in-
volve themselves and families in want and ruin by law-
suits.

PHYSICIANS.

The first physicians by dtbauek were made,
Exceu began, and «<otA sustains the trade.
By toil our long-liv'd fathers eam'd their food-
Toil strung their nenres and purified their blood.
The wise lor cure on exercise depend:
God never made his works for man to mend.

Drtoek.

Health and length of dap aiie such inestimable bles-
nngs^ that whoever can contribnte to their enjoyments
will be considered as a public benefactor. Hence, phy-
sicians have, in all ages, been treated with respect and
confideDce. Many of the medical men, whose skill and
experience contribute to the happiness of their fellow-
cltieens by the removal of disease^ have also enriched

lor

the troild of literature, not only with practical iretL'* •
tises on tfa^ healing art, but "with useftd productions'
in odier departments^ of science.

A very ingenious and indefatigable philosopher, in
mhsit he calk his ** Medicai pneumatic iMtitutUm^
informs us, that he has made a discovery which bids
fair to ensure the duration, if not the perfectibility,
ef man. How much superior is thb effort of Eng-
lish genius to any improvement hitherto made on the
Continent! A modem French chemist, indeed, has-
found out a mode of preserving dtad bodies ; but
our more enlightened countryman can preserve bodies
alive*

Aslnere existence, however, would not confer hap-
piness, this sage has found, by blissful experience, that
his panacea cftn, at once, revivify the frame, and fill
the mind with the most delightful ideas. Lest the
reader should feel an unpleasing impatience to learn the
name of this wonderful restorative, be it known to all
whom it may concern, that this universal medicine is air !
— -^es, my good-natured friends, it is air : — ^but not that
common effluvia of butchers^ stalls or cheesemongers'
shops which you have been so long necessitated to inhale
in your excursions through this capital ; — ^it is air in its

108

most nnadulterate and spirituous state, purified by
chemistry from eveiy particle of corruption !

This invaluable oxygen gas, or rather quintessence of
air, -will, ivhen it comes into general use, promote tem-
perance, sobriety, and industry, iu our populous towm,
especially the metropolis ; and the time now occupied in
short excursions to the country, for the benefit of pure
air, may be employed to more advantage at home, as
the valetudinarian may soon recover his health by the
daily inspiration of a small quantity of this aerial cordial.

This excellent medicine ivill be more efiicacious than
all the other famous remedies of the age. The botani-
cal syrup; the balm of gilead ; the lozenges of steel ;
ivith the rest of the miraculous nostrums of the day, ^vill
sopn fall into disrepute when put in competition with
refined ether. We must regret, indeed, that this inva-
luable remedy bids fair to ruin all those benign quacks
who have so long devoted their researches to the good of
the public. Poor men ! what will become of them?—
It would be worthy of the national munificence to raise
a subscription for the purpose of building a receptacle
for those destitute beings, to be called the Asylum for
Unfortunate Quacks.

109

IVIiglit not the general use of this joy-inspiring ether
render oar expensive public amusements unnecessary ?
Its titilating effect far excels our modern farces in raising
pleasurable ideas. Risibility may now be studied as a
science; and by the administration of difierent quanti-
ties of the doctor's merry gas, every gradation 6f mirth
may be attained from tlie gentle titter of the coquet^ to
the obstreperous roar of the coimtry 'squire.

Perhaps the philosophic discoverer of this cordial may»
by ^rther experiments, obtain an etherial substance
suti&ciently invigorating to support animal existence
without having recourse to the grosser elements for
subsistence. Then indeed, like the cameleon, we might
be said to live on air, nor would there be any danger of
riots on account of the high price of provisions.

Our epicures, however, might object to this hght
food, and still prefer gross turtle, venison, or even roast
beef, to the doctor's ambrosia. But when we reflect
how our gaiety is suspended during the process of con-
coction, we must rejoice th^t there is a sage in existence
able to provide aliment which, instead of promoting in-
dolence, stimulates to activity, and exhilarates to mirth.

The doctor says, that " under a certain administra-
tion of this gas, sleep may possibly be dispensed with i*^

110

%e ioteads to 0{^H>8e it to the decays of nature^ and lie is
himself so much re-invigonited by this grand lestorative*
that ** his morning alertness equals that of a healtlij
boy«'' it mast be evident to every intelligent reader,
that this sage far excels all other chemists ; if be has
• 9oty like Prometheus, brought down celestial fire to
animate the human Ibrm, he may justly^lmm the merit
of a discovery which will effectually prevent dissolution*
We may now hope to enjoy the ierrestrial inanottalitif
hinted at by modem sages ; while old age and death are
for ever banished from the haunts of man!

But, however delightful the prolongation of life nay
be to the community in general, there are a few selfish
individuals who will be little obliged to the doctor for
his discovery. Young heirs who are impatiently waiting
for the decease of their parents, and hen-pecked hus-
bands who wear the galling chains of tnatrimony, will,
doubtless, execrate that philosophy which disappoints
their hopes of the removal of those inimical to their
happiness. But sucb partial grievances are inconsidera-
ble, when compared.with the universality of the benefit
V held out to mankind.

By fnbaliiig this ecstatic ether, the most delicate Uoom
'4tvill adorn the cheeks of our ladies, who now in vain

Ill

lavish so much time and money io the pmfchase and
9{^lication of paints and lotions; at the same time that
Its icxhilaniting infloenee will hace the nerves and cheer
the beaft. .

Afte;t having expatiated on the benign efiects of this
fnedicine, the reader might suf^se that health was as
uniyersal as air in this city ; — alas! it is not ; — ^many now
languisb in liogeriog torture, from which death alone
can release them. Nevertheless^ above three- fourths
<of the diseases of London are ideal, and numbers of
-patients contr9>ttte to the support' of the physician, and
pay .him liberally for regular attendance, at the same
time that they labour, not under bodily indisposition,
^ttt the imaginary ailments of a mind diseased. Many
an athletic hypochondriac, whose sanity would be re-
«toreil in a few days by exeroise, now imagines himself
at the point of dissolution, though he will probably out-
live his physician. The revelry and excess of those un-
liappy beings has produced such a total relaxation of
body and imbecility of mind, that they tremble at the
momentary gloom occasioned by every passing cloud :
-ihe sight of a hearse fills them with horror; and the
mournful knell thrills throqgh every fibre with excruciat-
iug torture.

113

Were we to investigate the origin of those diseases
that really exist in the capital, they tvould be found to
proceed from gluttony* indolence, and sensuality ; con-
sequently, not only the preventive but the core may he
found in an adherence to temperance, activity, and. mo-
deration.

QUACK DOCTORS.

Amongst Ihe improvements in science of which this
age can boast, the art of healing has been brought to
the greatest perfection : Cures little less than miracnioos
are saidAo be daily performed by the administration of
nostrums, such as De Velno's Vegetable Syrup; the
Nervous Cordial, and theBalm of Gilead. It appears
that health and longevity may now be purchased for a
few shillings; and nothing but obstinate incredulity can
prevent the J)elief that some sage will suddenly arise, to
dispense immortality to the human species.

Indeed, Dr. Beddoes has made a gigantic stride to-
wards immortality. ^ His oxygen gas, if taken in suffici-
ent quautitv, will counteract the decays of nature ; and
as^there is little doubt that a man will Kve as long as he
can breathe this pure ether, the Doctor bids fair to re-
store the longevity of the antiileluvians. But even vital
air itself is less powerful in its effects than galvanism*

113

By the applkiition of metyiic subsKncel^ zinc, &c.
to the museolar parts'of cold-blooded unimals^ siicli as
irogi, and waim-blooded animak, such at geese, asses,
men^' women, and children, the most wonderful distor-
tions are produced. -Nay, we are told, that in an exr
pertment made on a malefactor wha was executed at
Newgate, he immediately opened his mouth ;-^oubtless,
another applicatiou would have made him speak, but
the operators, Aldim*, Wilkinson, and Co. were so much
4ifffigbted, that they threw down their ^instrumentsf and
took to their heels.

The galvanic Battery is very different finora that used
by the military. The latter destroys the living, but the
former, directed by an adept like IMr. Wilkinson, may
be brought tojraise the dead.

Having thus paid a tribute of approbation to those
disinterested and modest philosophers who labour inces-
santly for the public good, let us now turn our attention
to a still more extraordmary class of men, the modest
and jusi Doctors Brodum, Solonion, and Gardener. —
These extraordinary men, jvithout either education or
genius, have contrived to persuade the public to pur-
chase their medicines; in consequence of which they are

114

eii&bkid^4o]iVeioa<ityte'<ifgriDdett«S' J^itwittwotibi-
M, that \i4^ tte radMriourtradetiniDi^stMg^Bs' teid
to obtain a:4v^49riMdfl«bM8leiioei> saQkbanogfas ,Si^
mon shoutd'b^'MaolitHitdil^tatpataittiittba^pmvticetof
ofimpoitiirer l^H^y ^uchvisiiie'.paHR^cndalite^, tint
tliose poRxms^wlio^iBvlaifiiiagaiiigt tlK«nalla# ra a uu the
price of t i c e q5 «i i o y»> aw* vutaog: tboit finlrrtar.gifle?tltoir
HioQey4bi(nntuvn4»£tfeaele» water^.iiftaa( 4ndt'sr«aKi»>
ty of :nottieoi» iagtedkntSf undorttlle wfiltmHiiwliiig
namM^ Aito<#6ilfead^ NervDus 4!Iordiaiy aiid^V«gi>>
table Syrup. Alas! how many soiKwoiit Dpimev have
the poisoners of inaokind bestowed upon Death!

WW it be beHevedlby posterity, that at tbceoiniDence-
Ment^ of^ the nineteentlr' century Qoaek Dbctcvsweie
enabled, by the credulity of- Ebglcrfnnen, to- amass
wealth;' nay, that any pretender to the art of healiBg
might for a few pounds pwckase the academicdiegree of
M.'D. in a Scotch university, and afterwards obtain a
patent to slay his thousands and tens of thousands ac-
corditig tolawl If may, indeed,' bie assert^ in idndi-
eation of patents, that since people will Venture to swal-
low nostrums, the State oug-ht to proiSt by their credn-
lity and fbllv.

Though pa^ienU die, the poc^ot'*! pai4 1
lietni'dto UU^ lie gains a pafaoe
i^blr Wikt ^6f&)6r laoiiiits ^ gttlloWs t

Dr. Brodom b a Genmtt' Je#T b« attei4M.D^ B^y
in quality of a footouiD^ when that beoeikeat sage c^me
over to.eki]ighten the eyes of the £ngiish» aocl with him
made the tour of England. Efaving obtaibed the know-
ledge of several medical terms> by being present at the
lectures of liis eloquent . master, this enterprising litUe
lacquey resolved to conlmence Doctor himself. We are
not certain whether the love of gaih, or a denre to allevi-
ate the.sufferibgs of hisfdlow-creatures» first induced Dr.
Brpdum to give up the science of shavings dressing a wig,
and brushing a coat, for the liiore elegant art of prepar-
ing the Nertous Cat dial and Botanical Syrup — tw6
m^dk^neswiiiohy from the Doctoi^s knoMrkdge of the
lionttan^syBlem of botany^ w^may consider as graoA
re^tomdv^-of nature. Berhaps his medical skiil^ xn)^
communicated in aviiriofi by some demuMi of tlieO^maa
IHumimti, Bttt it is not imptobabie^ tfaM^' tHe jNtoret of
preparing^ the aboi^e-mentioned medicines- i^' hareditarf
ni;hk family^ as the D6ctor himself seems to in.4inaaiey
whed he tellius in his ^' Quids t^OM'J^e/^ that "there

116

is no other penKm oftBe Dame^of Brodmn in Englanfl^''
Many are the different media -by which wisdom can
be imparted to others. Connt Cagliostro may have
bequeathed to the Doctorthe secret of tnanufacturing
bis Bamn ie Vie; or, perhaps, the famous .Count de St.
Germaine communicated his recipe for the preparatioii
of his Tea far frolcnging Life.

The talisman, however, which metamorphosed a
lacquey into a physician, was the diploma which the
{fenevoleni and dirinterettei professors iii (be Mariscbal
College of Aberdeen sent to this enterprising foreiguer.
But 3dietber that learned body accepted a pecuniary
compensation .of one pound thirteen shillings and three
pence three tarthings sterling, as Dr, Panglos says tbey
did from him, nr whether the little German was liberal
enough to oend them a Jai]ger sum, b only known to the
parties concerned.

>60€)n aAer the commencement <tf Jus medical career,
the.Doctor found a powerful auxiliai^. IB the person of
the late jQuack. Dfoctor Freeman's widow. Jlis union , to
this sapient female contributed much to his physical'
AritotoMgejiand if she prove a fruitful vinf, their illustri-
ous progeny, by a timely initiation into the prmoiptes of
medical imposture, may be able to supply all the dupe$
sxml fools in Europe with remedies for every disease.

iiy

Having traVielled throagh diffiurebl parts* o£ Eoglandy
•like- a public benefactor,- generbasly dispensmg medicines
.for a 'small compensation, . Iba. Doctor at length I'esolved
^to become a resident in the metropolia.

' - • • ■

' That merit sdch- as his sliould. go unrewarded, would
be an eztraordinary^instanceof'd^eneiacy ii^ the Eng-
lish nation. A man who raised himself from the humble
sitoation of a menial servant to the bonourable avocation
« of working minieles, and who, without either genius or
education,. has been the author of a work which (he
says) has already passed through upwards of fifty edi--
tions, mast be a most wonderful. being I

A person'with such multifarious'endowmeiits must be
fully, adequate to the important task of producing a
treatisie fraught with instruction, andf calculated to guide
the aspiriug youth ai Old Engiand to tbe desirable at-
lailunent oi'^ premature oldnfpe /'aconsunmiatjon which
' tiiey appear to be ambitions of arriviDg at witfo all possi-
ble celerity, if we may judge from the dissoluteness of
their lives* . . t

The compiler of lAtetary Mlemoirs of Living
' Authors t speaking of Dr. Broduim, cialls him ''one of
'those empirics>itf>|^ysic and newspaper puffers/ whose

118

soiel Nay» was iliacft>iitotdioii8 in 1iid«iitieto>«nitHlN;
name of Dr. Solomon, whose pamphlet was equally entn
fBod lohh jafcw,tiuliai| t .Bn'B«6daniwtln»and" i^ery
^tthtr iitttfirtcf trf uwj f U pas> apimtrfverwMi tmr'Ab pBfaik
iM!fiocs,>iini3^«iQ^atale:'hiln6HT «di|i cMie refleetiaii, * that
igprt«f^««m»iA«ene«erobeaif iwftyfgBt ? to-^llig- fyJMmitifl
■ii^afbrof^caiQinn^ynBttdrtbat .chance MB :m tax".«IMi a
.^tduiiniitsl pAy> to tiMl poUiolbr Mng'cwianit.

When we refio^^ilimierK^.wi^llwuftlidnfeilii^^

unireraal health bestowed by those retailers of sanity, or

^K^A-^im»ga^s» * iv)e>>mii9t ir^kerantthe idea tfast .agri-

cij^iftWPp, Jiianii&^lttre$»>f^ *itiagr

4M^ k<P rpiifflM!til >wi|bo|ife >tibe. *i«ke9tuptiok;i< of" sadtncss.

,^iiiWptfjjfiritrrt ngt^n, ^liSi^ our . ^HiwiflMK^

,|«feif«r%^d#(^:<)nlfa^';iu^ QiM aie jnsHiy

jfii^lit^. ^:wk 4IOB0RII3. M a Homan ^ho aared/^tfae

i\^ffi^t9kytillsm09^^ ahini»iiidtoi^taliB«tBte,

how much more «hottld such men as Dr. BmAitnTtmrt

Dr. Solpmon, who have saved thousands, be rewarded

^fi^^lsoniN^rqdl, <«^ldH^«^ >«;pr% ^C^^riicgen-

f^rotti^ 4o.i^pe^»a iui^eipijplM^ fw t1i$ piiB|mf».qCtH9i(tolkig

lift

MUlnftMHHilPte liifc front <ifNfiir||a1«r datmUbe nfJ^it

ii^voaty yout%ibl4i«roe8*:4i&elhtir::ii^|hr loi the woi4d
4liilMi#«i!a. iTbe- mstism -tof : vice, -^i^m tbe laws of bis

l^otetcf the flMiieSraDd mon^ifeeivitfalii&iaist.brcathcii
tMbwdeficsM eSeitttf m8$ntms,pfhi&e lie acknowiedged,
tbat.tliepioaMe *ff>MMii0«ftfAMlfA'liadiBdu(jfediiim to
. i ^mitn ie his cittmr ^f tiepinmM^wkA to \f ttider tfarougli
the haunts of knpafity Mid disease, till «xoess» :iike a
flame to the oil, exhausted his constitution, and pernici-
•<««urhdbttiiidr0ve4iim to an ofieirvioiatioa ofihe lates of
!tlut soaetjiviitchvfaad **4ig»tkm4^iUGe m detoaied sin f

Kent to Broduoiy . the most, noted advertisviig Qaack

'of iviiioii England may jus^lyoast, is the dkmtefested

• Doctor Sotomon, of Lmrpool* v/ho has be^i^ authorise

-lijtbtt,^»iflr4|M Professors of th|g Markcfoal Collie of

Alierdeen to kill or cure secundum m'iem.

According tolbemost authentic documents it iippears,
.4bat thesageSdenmais^JcWywho in iua yonthftil ^ays
^e»jmed^mkmiest M$eHhi»d hy h^vfkin^ blacV-ball thro
'«he-sti«et9.of Namaslle'^a'^TyQe. His {advancement is
^senaaidHible ; for k appears, that fa.9 has since turned hjs
i^attenlioaxfram blacking the boots of the gentlemen ta

J20

varoishing the fiices of tbe ladies. His AbsUijgeiit Lo»
tion will doubtless eUanse the skin of any fair-one .who
has Uie folly to apply it to her qpidennis. Poor Solo-
inon has passed through almost as maoy changes as a
'butterfly. He endeavoured to establish a newspaper in
Liverpool, but the good sense of the people pr^ailed,
• the aspiring Jew was obliged to seek a more friendly
soil; and he actually had the lumesi^ and modesty to
propose to sell his unestablished newspaper to a young
bookseller in Castle-street, Liverpool L

« •

Dr. Solomon does not tell us by what means the won-
derful secret of mingling gold with the balm of Mecca
was first communicated to him. Perhaps the inspiring
dove of Mohi^et flew from Mecca ,to the Doctor with
the healing balm on its wings, and incited him to impose
upon the vile Chiistians of England; thus by a combi-
nation oiJewisk and Mahmnetan wisdom^ enabling tiie
sage to work miracles..

Cavillers may say, that the Doctor^s pretensions to a
new discovery in medicine is only a revival of the chme*
rirar experiments of formec deluded alchymistsi but>
from his geoera) professions of benevolencei ^t must be
evident, that he not only means well,- but Js convinced
of the efficacy of hb Anti-lmpetigines, . Thhhardwwd

J21

ts m of tlieobiervatioiiftoftr Spaniah si^yrist on.
Quaek medieiaes: — ^''To hear Quacks caB over their
Hmplea^ aa^^he, '*woiiM make yoa swear they were
niisk^so many devils; — suchas Ot|)opanex, Buphtalmas,
AlectorolophoSy Ophioserodeo,vand a: grei^maoy morei
And by all this formidalile bombast is iueaiit nothiBg ia
the woiitl^ bnt a few simple root% such as earrotsy tumips,
radishes, and the like. But they keep the. old proverb
in remeralHraiice — He thmt knows fhee tpUl never buy
thee : and, therefore, every thiog must be madci a mystery
to hold the public in ignoxaoce J*

It has been mentioDed i»<itheformer part'of this work,
.that.the Doctor has adorned his elegant Treatise with bis
portrait. Besides this embellishment, he has favoured,
the pablic with an engraving of bis mansion in Liverpool.
Hence the happy/cfio who have been so ibirtunate as to
. outlive the effects of his Csrdtal Balm and Anii'Imptti-
gmes, may view the residence of their benefactor. A
scale is annexed, by which it appears^ that the body of
this consecrated tenement is seventy feet long ; and un-
doubtedly, were the philanthropic proprietor exalted
. according to his merit,, be would be placed by. public
justice in a situation as emiaent and conspicuous as thai:
ivhich conferred immortalityoH Haman I

1«8

ftop^img llMit a>|MMiple «Im> hald^beeo «b loog^ii ^
tabft o£ ifWllMnng) iiq|dUhpoilta,^undlar "Hie Imlie^
MiM^,ymmid'iexafy 4>e pnanaded to: |Hiielwse bis
BMlram. . Oiiilis ariivalria tbelnsh ^capfttd/ he xaSOnA
opoftaivoider of fi^ent «itdiciiies9..flnd i«iii|iufed^ iiiie^
tec h^ sotcl thft Kicelleat fiaiiacea 4>f tbe-citlebittled and
fo»viiiowuMl'Dr.'*Sol6MOD, of Lifetiiibol. "Elie.t'iHUi
Mpliftd in tkenegotive ; — ^^ O, «ir/' said^tbe^pietok/' "^'Dr.
6d(iraioa is'ontf of theni^t ^MA ^phfjOMns in* Suffope,
his Cordial Balm of Gil«ad ts^aa aai^vienat ittstenitive.''
*' I now recollect/' said the sho]Aeeper, *^ that a friend
of riiHBe 'who tesidei in this -nrigfabemhood^'is very foud
m luB praisa of tfaataiedicine; ^if* yoafileasei .sir,^- !• will
iwnd'Ibf him."

3lie;DoGlts'r)bo«red assebt; the person 49UDe»:^aBd
•aflar thettiatMidactory compIinieDts^ ^theisel^oaiiQeited
ii^otntoxelaiaied, **Iittnde»itafid»«uv ttaitjAHiappi^ve
*of 'Dr^ Sdlomon's Cordial Balm of Oile^d.*' «t I; do in-
^d«ed»"r'r9|ri»d the ather, 'M ha»e^recaiipedv9e»y:^«at
^famifit from it; and shatt<i?ercoi|iideral^a«poe^of'the
.^andit excdient 'madickies in the world. ^A few vveeks
Mcea rich^old^umt of mineiAottghlipropier toi pmjEhtBe
a bdtUe of Di^.iSalomo«'8 GoidiaiBalm of €^IqM» or
Anti*Impetigines, I don't axactl^ know which; the cos-

tiM^>toMe».MA6^dicd,*isBfji4^i lilies tdtti* MlaiMl^
«>3Rorai3rpaft 1 sfaBlLffvevfeppnyee^ttaat^aittfttntHmdi-
icioe to: #faioh i am^iadebted formf CavtaM."

mve'^kAMW^rted Qmck^sMiked wmiy/^lraviigr the
-Hibemiaas to>'biijoy i<he-iaugh at Mi exptMe, aiid*'fae
'w>tnf iMid ton Obi Sqglftiid, iA«lnie^l Ibr'tllt MrcceMiul
practice of quaekefy.

>OMe beneCtviiiin time bc^ilerlveil by Ae eommmiity

^petntqiiaickiiHNlioiiies. The^peo^ple by repeated experi-

"liieBtfrofthefR^liioaey of Btfedum's/Seloiiioii^s, Sivani-

iflCHl's/ ttid Oatdfief^sh^tfunis, > wilt* at letfgtb find^tbem

-epefateas «H)«re lb« ercaWify.

<Wlh'^fegaril4o<'tbe<ve9piietiTe merit %f tbe GereiBti

'^«id» fiftglbb Qeiieks^ fts#oiddbe> (ll£eHlt4o4etoniiitie

^^ieb'ia bwt eetitMto oor^^eppfobfllioik :*Soloiiioii

ibekiga Jewol4{|ip«w«gi^D#tb^ pttMbfyceMid^rs^Bre-

odtini 9^iwa 'iateiteper. > We ^ iM^tam ifaat ekbev of

these pracdtiOQers^aie'*|K»piikr>eiE|0iig theirjbratlape^

Tbe children of Abraham are too CBBHing to give their

manUh'ibr ehherHhe'-Kervous'Cotdkdor evetfthcBabn

of Gilead itself! Iiyieed, the iipnpedttUjty jof the Irraelites

^is proveiUid. Hk^'Mmm m 49ttblk89:8]uUed Jo^the

124

^i^iitiws of every strnfile. ''fromtfie*cedartbat*gnMrsiB
Lebmum to the hyssop tfaatf;iows on the waB^'' and be
eveu seems to excd the GemuiB empire by expenments
upon those M«emiM 6|^kA who swaHow fai»eordiaL Fair
dames, who are desirous to imbibe instructioa at the
jf^Nintain-hes^d, have now a: fine opportunity to 'gratify
their curiosity; and we aiay expect to hear som% de^-
rcrp9 vbiting.tbe mse.man of Liverpool, as< the Queen
of Sheba did hb namesake at Jeru^alem^.

Dr. Senate, like a Ifenevolent philosopher/ bas en-
deavoured to remedy the. waste occasioned by the sword,
by Loztnges of Steel, which will render even sterility
.itself prolific. It is remarkable that the Quack- should
think it necessar}', in a. public advertisement, to *^ de-
clare solemnly, that no person living, except himself
and another person, ever saw or has any, knowledge of
the preparation witli-which Les Pastilles Martialles de
Monfpeilier, or Aromatic Lozenges of Steel,, are* pre-
pared/' Steel has eyer been either an extellent friend or
formidable enem^ to the human race, according to* the
use to which it is applied. The Poet says,

*' What time weold spare,. fron|. steel receives its date.
And monuments, like man, submit to fa^e ;
8f^e] could the labours of the Gods destroy,
A^id-strike tadiist the** imperii ton? Vs. <rf Troy>-

^teel eoiild the works i»f mortal priife coofoiud,
Aod liew trinmphal arches to the gronod :
What wonder thee, fiur dame, thy health shoald feel
The coDqa*riii|; force of anretisted eteel!

Indeed there is the greatest probability that sach ladies
as are rash enough to swallow the metallic tonic of Dr.
S.will have but too much reason to agree with the poet.

Few persons wiH have the hardihood to deny the
power of steel. As a poliikal medicine it has been
prvtty- liberally dispensed on the Continent, to the de-
struction of myriads of the human species ; but how
pills of the same metal can^be conducive to population
< is extremely paradoxical mdeed.

THE QUACK.— AN EPIGRAM.

Ne*er doobt my pretentions, 1 am a physician,
See, here's my diploma, and in good conditioo ;
From Aberdeen sent by the coach, on my honour,
I paid English gold to the,generoos donor.
If that won't snflSee, here's my prosthnte patent,
'To core all di>eases, apparent or latent
Perhaps yon suspected, I was but a poacher
On the right of physicians, a frontless encroacher;
■But my quaUfkati^n's like theirs, without flaw«
ji^d J kill my game fairly according to Utw !

tt^SStSfHiS.

ROBeS!fov 094AlMikB^

And lilies for tlie browt of faded age i
. Teelh for thp tootUeaiy ringUsts for the baldi .
}|eav*o, earth, and ocean', plander'd of their sweets :
Ne'cCsreims es8ekr<*te, Olylfaplad det^s !

, WentitQ.llw.qMMfc doctoMf^aMy »be clnwBdvtfciMe
litwitifieiB of 41m kwaavcouHlsBiuioft— 'tib < imt mfmm «f
c€muik$** Akbd-k9 tim ttUModoMfKiiNH^'ef M
andtncturet,; new beaolie&^^i^taavfniiae-thet&oe,' and we
]beboldr tlie..rQieate' blaomr o£ y<iutih «9ajle like nioiim^
light on the Tarnished ymg^ci age.

While a superabundaQce of paints. a|M) lotions reno-
vate beanty, the fair artist daily improves in taste; she
gnides the pencil mih such skill over every line of her
face, and imitates nature with snob elegance^ that we
may soott^be. aUeto boast o^ female* pettnit^pakiters
who will excel* even Sir/ Josfaa»' Re^nokls'himsdf ! One
great advantage in favour of feniale genius; in thl» in-
stance, is the superior texture of the skm to canvas, or
any other artificial ground* It is to be regretted^ how-
ever, that too many of our female artists grow nc^gent
after marriage, and* reiQeoting. that the portrait is sold,.

iir

take fittfe pain^ta^iMjpitofMts tiili^ ntju it 'is iMfciftd»
tlni they ^fh«!pb<owi»^-hMt#aiiy iii<lliinwl^tifcoi».»fiwr

ii«fl»]6iEllfe jtooel^emiMil! iiirihi iwthto -hiwt^iaenfliy
beeooM iiiofeie9lHRbte[*ia>tiwftyet ^Am^rnm^mtm «l
pvoportiQtt to'tbeii^sge;

HoiraiBWt tor soke Ills pveUed*} I»^it liioeitaie
liHtais ahMQiB eo mlmK i iin iDyti ol i fiiun oflier%p gMfc|^»
that die fair 8ex» who.aiiBPie*nirtiiMiJ.be<iitiail fhwrMr
a nciifice to tbeir own impnidenoel— ^the
r/cvSA add-^-liieir i»ixr7.

One of our edikat wiitenr sayi^ tkat' there* arc '^ no
better canref)te9 than a severe tempenmce and polity^
modesty and' homOity, a grackms temper dnd* eahMne^
of Bpirit; no true beauty vitiionttbe siginatmitai of these
graces in the very conntenaace."^ Snch pmitafiicaf pre-
cepts migfat have been »teenied in'Aedaysof yone? but
what womaikof qaiiit would now submit to such phSoso-
pfaic seliMeniall Seveie temperance, modesty, and
hnmilityi indeed! No, no, our modish fidr ones are
too knowing, to venerate the slavish restrictions of
morality^ —

'^Iloorlv they give, and-speodv juid/w«9ie« abd TfV<cftr,
*< And think no- ploaturo can beboaght teo dear !**

128

. Tn thtt «Bl%litened'agiB, the wage'tiibt time Iwd does
tored with a philoiiiot hue oovr ammes the mellow
lilttshofiiebe henetf. Cnroam sends her BIckmii to
animate the faceof English beauty: ^exotic iiknlies 'are
imported as superior to those suftisions formerly cele-
brated by our poets ; and art, woader-wofldng^ srI; is
the creator of fashionable beauty. Hoaiy lo^ks -and
tirrinklesarelMuiished from this happy metropolis^ and
•washes which render the ladies*' ever iair and erer
^oimg,'' may be oblamed for gold.

■

Those irresistible arms of tlie -ladies of London are
' chiefly compounded of ingenious chymical preparations.
JVfercury, that conqueror of the sen» -of pleasure* and
lead, that destroyer of heroes, form the principal ingre-
dients with which the fair-sex so plentifully lacker their
.epidermis!* Ah ! spare our beaux, ye fascinating ma-
trons and ever-blooming. virgins, nor thus incase ycmr-
selves in a coat of mail that at once allures and destnm I

The curiosity of our mother Eve first introchiced
knovirledge to the human race, and it may rationtdFy be
supposed that the first "woman has been excelled by her

• As bard words ere often unintelligible ta the iunoeent

.part of the fair sex, it may be proper to inform tbrm^ that

the epidermis ist^eotitcnrmost skiu of the bmnan body. ^9

• for the FSMALB fAi-lo^ophers, they know every thiog! ! !.

129

ijbught^rs la useful and excellent diteoVeries. indeed,
from what we can learn. Eve had but a very imperfect
idea of dress ; nor did she require the aid of cosmetics,
for her ^ce and form were already superlatively charm-
ittg. At length time deprived our lovely mother of her
graces, and death triumphed over the fairest part of the
Visibfe creation* Our modem belles, on the contrary,
have invented tints that set the assaults of time at de-
fiance : their happy skill can adorn the palest cheek with
a permanent vermeil hue, and prevent the decays of old
age from becoming visible; nay, it is not improbable
that their wonderful inventive powers will eventually
u-vcrcome the ghastly horrors of death, «nd shine with
undiminished chafms even in the shroud.

The superiority of miificial to natural beautv will
ap|)ear in all its dignity, if we contrast the permanent
bloom of the former with tlie unfashionable flushings of
the latter. A truly modest woman, whose delicate or-
ganization delineates every strong emotion in her ex-
pressive face, must appear a singular being in the eyes of
those modish females,, whose faces wear one unchange-
able smile. The aspect of the modest woman is like
the aurora borealis, while her blushes alternatelv flash
and fade; but the countenance of the accomplished

ISO

My, decorated with cosmbtics, resenribles llie t/m,
and ^mes with uiiiidiBg glory.

CARICATURE AND PRINTSHOPS.

The caricatore and printshops, which are so g r a lifym g:
to the fancy of die idle and lieentioos^ mast necessaiily
have a powerfol inAiieiioe on the morals and industry of
the people. Caricaturists are certainly entitled to the
reward which a well-regulated police wfll ever bestow on
the promoters of immorality and profaneness. Their
indelatigable study to ridicule oddities of character
might be overlooked, and in a few instttices their exhi-
bition of vice to derision may be useful, but the general
efiect of their productions is the proper standard by
which we can duly estimate ^their merit or demerit. —
When brought to the tribunal of reason, it will be found
that the greater part of such caricatures, prints, and
paintings, as appear in the windows of our printsellers,
are injurious to virtue.

This humouJt>us mode of satirising folly is very pre-
judicial to the multitude in many respects:— in the loss
of time to those who stop to contemplate the difierent
Hgiires; the opportunities given to pickpockets to exer-
tnse their art ; and that incitement to licentiousness oc-

431

caKoned by ibe «%iit of vekiptiMiis pMtkigB. The inde-
cent attitudes^ obscene labels, and similar decorations,
must have a powerful effect on the feelings of susceptible
youth; anditasfltt JUitlMitkat^ ftct, that girls often
go in parties to iMt Ifae windows of print^ops, that
tbej may amuse themselves with the view of naked
6guies In the most indecent postures.

Before tfaeae wiiidows, the apprentice loiters uumind*
-^1 of bis master's business; and thither the prostitutes
hasten, and with fescmating glances endeavour to allure
the giddy and the vain who stop to gaze on the deqHmg
Venus, the BrkiBh Vaau^ and a variety fsi seductive re-
\ ) resentations of feminine beauty.

Are these witty but prophane and indecent labels, and
this display of nudities, productive of any goodl-ndo
they not rather tend to the depravation of mind, and
contribute to relax the moral ties of sodetyl If such be
their tendency, the magistracy would deserve the grati-
tude, not only of the present generation, but of millions
yet unborn, by the sui^ression of those libidinous paint-
ings and engravings, which, through the medium of the
eye, empoison the pnriW of the human heart, and mis-
lead the hiughing victim into the paths of foHy and vice.

132

MODERN PHILOSOPHERS.

We nobly take the high frtm road,

And reason downward till we doubt of GoD ;

Make Nabtre still encroach upon hli plan,.

And shove him off as far at e'er, we can t

Thrust some mechanic cause Into his place i *"

Oi* bind in matter, or diffuse in space.

Pope.

This enlightened and ioqiiisitrre age wiU be dktio-
jg;uished in history ^s remarkaUe for refined and ingeni-
i>iis speculations. — ^Among our contemporary authors,
tiiose theorists who have modestly assumed the name of
{>hilosopbers have excited the most general attention.

These sages may be divided into two classes : the first
consisting of metaphysicians^ and e&ical writers; and
the second comprising those more dangerous innovators
%vho intit)duce sophistry in the garb of elegant literature,
,4ind promulge their opinions through the medium of
^omaDces, and the drama. Grave sages, having cuUed
the best moral precepts fi om the works of the ancients,
propose to improve mankind by a better system tbaa
•afty hitherto devised. Their doctrine inculcates the idea
of Xht perfectibility of the human mind in this life ; and
tijey profess to reform the abuses which have crept into
tt«i human institutions. The Utopian speculations of

133

these sBges, however, have not even the merit of origin
nality ; and, happily for mankind, their theories are con-
ceived so much under the influence of duhiets as to be
imintelligible.

Inflated with arrogance, they ascribe the slow pro^
gress of their doctrine to the obstinate and indocile igiio«
ranee of mankind, whose prejudices, like clouds, obscure
the light of the new phUosapky^ Foreseeing the opposi-
tion which their abstruse theories must encounter, they
have defended themselves by the very pertinent remark;
tjiat metaphysics are above the capacity of the common
reader. For whom then are such books published t-—
certainly not for the exclusive information of philosoph-
ers, but the general instruction of mankind : for, as a
modem writer observes, ** Metaphysics is in tmth
nothing more than the employment of good sense, in
observing our own thoughts, feelings, and actions; and
when the fects which are thus observed are expressed, at
they ought to be, in plain language, it is perhaps^ above
all other sciaices, most on a level with the capacity and
information of the -generality of thinking men. When it
is thus expressed, it requires no previous qualification,
but a sound judgment, perfectly to comprehend it; and
those who wrap it up in a technical and mysterious jarr
gon, always give us strong reason to suspect that tfae^
are not phihsophers, but impMars,

134

Were we to enquire why so nmnj new-s^^tais of me-,
taphysics aiid ethks are pronnilgated among numkind.
we should find that they originate in dm pnde of aspr-
iiig individuals. Learned pride in the philosopher and
tlie flattered vanity of his votaries, axe the origin t^ all
those abstruse systems of human knowledge that now
militate against revelation, and the happittes» of man-
kind; but the voluminous productions of French, and
German and Elnglbh freethinkers and atheists will, when
brought to the test of truth, be found to consist of a few
impious ideas, expanded into long dissertations. These
^rial castles, like immense columns of clouds, will, when
«)cp9sed to the per^'ading rays' of common seiyse, eva-
{sqzate into thin air.

Without a God, the universe would be as dreary as
/9ur system without a sun. The comfortable idea of his
j>r^8iduig Providence enables the believer to struggle
with adver»ty<» and to hope amid the most discouraging
ctpcuttistanees.. On the other hand, the atheist, who
fcaa emitted for himself a faneifnl edi^ce of human per-
.iJBCtion^. and who, trusting, to his own sagacity and ex-
j0itfoii% fipds to his inexpressible woe th^t his proud
Botiona wece onfounded, either sinks iuto the torpor of
iodyeeility, or rises to the plirensy of despair, and often
files to gelf 'murder 2i6 a refuge from reflection !

135

Wliat mys the Ckratiaiit

Tkere lives «nd works

A soul in all thiogi, and that soel Is Go p.

What says the atheist? *' Nature produced all thinfp/'
Atheists! look around, behold the woodeis of creative
wisdom in the heavens and the earth; contemplate the
structure of the human frame- the iacidtie9 of the
niiod; and exclaim with David, " FearfiiUy and won-
derfully am I madeT Ah! do not Smpiotiffly emplqy
your endowments in oppoutioa to the revealed will of
the beneficent Giver of life and reascm ! Act aot so un-
gratefully; but, with melting hearts, fall prostrate and
repeutiug before your omnipresent Creator.

^ Those atheistical metaphysicians, however, are not
so dangerous as might at first be 24>preheQded. Their
researches in the labyrinth cf£ .ratiocination has imper-
ceptibly carried them so iar into the bottomless abyss of
delusion, that they are alike unintelligible to themselves
and others. Tlieir lamp of reason emits a brilliant light
at the outset; but as they proceed, it gradually becomes
dim, and eventually expires, leaving them overwhelmed
in eternal darkness.

136

A more formidable and ingedious sect of specuiatirts
has emerged iuto public observation. These sages adapt
their systems to the natural propensities of the human
heart. By rejecting and deriding the moral precepts,
which eiyoin self-denial, and by artfully cherishing the
passions* they enchant their votaries, who extol them
as denii-gods.

Our modish sages, with an ingenuity and efirontery
unknown to the ancients^ have combined the pride of
the stoic with the voluptuousness of the epicurean ; and
at once gratify their proselytes with the idea that they
are pursuing the dictates of virtue, while yielding to the
impulse of every desire. Hence their popularity, and
the pernicious effects of their sophistry on the morals of
the community*

Thus vice has not only assumed the garb, but even
the sentinjients of virtue ! Under ^be plausible name of
refinement, the most abominable sensuality allures the
unsuspecting mind, both in the closet mid the theatre—
in the dramas, novels, and philosophical publications of
the day. Did our fashionable infidels allow themselves
to exercise their own reason, they would discover, that
instead of thinking independently, they are the most
superstitious of jnortalsi Misled by the eloquent so-

137

pfaistry of a few proud modem ilhmUnati, they are
neither free id thought nor action, but led captive by
their tyrannic appetites.

The new philosophy is little more than a revival of
the obsolete opinions of Bolingbroke, Tbdal^ and other
free-thinkers, who initiated Voltaire in the first princi-
ples of infidelity. By the activity and perseverance of
Voltaire, d'Alembert, and Diderot, scepticism was pro-
mulgated over the contment with astonishing rapidity .-r-
Those great men, glorying in their enterprise, employed
all then- powers to subvert Christianity, and the French
Encyclopedic proved a most powerful engine of infi-
delity.

Affecting a most philosophic benignity, those cunning
sophisters rang all the changes on iokratum and reas&n.
The contagion of irreHgi<m and immorality was commu-
nicated to the public mind under the insinuating forms
of history, natural phOosophy, poetry, and romances;
and Voltaire was particularly successful -in the adminis-
tration of those empoisoned potions. Having exercised
his wit in the ridicule of various human institutions, he
attacked revelation with all the malignancy of satire. —
There was something so spirited and noble in laughing
«t what others considered as sacred, that multitudes

13B

in tbe franfic ro«r»aiid ttblanghiiigMge
the fiiTOttrite of the peo|de. .

Havmg passed throng the medium ot Freneh
likegohiiefiiiediii tfaeerodbfey this fuecioiis j^ktaphy
has lecently bten iatroduced in * The Age otReutmJ
Bnt its andior unwufly eipoaed Ihe maUgnancy of Us
own heart, wih snch scmrility, that .he disgnsled and
abmned the leader. The teskof eail^itHdngtheiivh-
Hc mind has since been midertafcen by men of OMwe
refined manners, and superior genias» whohanFeoniied
elegance with sophistry. Indeed the fioenqfraui theory of
perfectibility a|^pean amosing, but its sophisms are im-
practicabie ; while Christianity enjoins no preempt tiiat
is not practical and conducive to happiness. The
gofgeousand Insnriaiit hues of the rainbow may dd^ght
.for. a momenty hot we soon turn from its fitfiii^ magoi-
ficeoce to enjoy the agreedble and petmaoent light of
the snn.

It is much to be regretted, tiiat the deist whose pene-
tration has discovered such errors in the religion of onr
ancestors, should be so successful in the d^iavatiott of
his fellow-ereatures. When Addison flourished, this
metropolis could boast of only a few free^tlmiheffs ; '' but
we are polished now,'* and the attorney's clerk, the man

139

ittiiiitav iui]r> cvci^ Ife Vaitiag-niiid and fiBotvnaii
cnriMmcing tlie moilini yh B—fi hy, 'deride the Aidi
nrlnch led their pemti to heairai. FnmthetBiMKietof

]flipe«s wit Ihere is no n y pitt l; — niM« is hersirovd*
9»ijpkktry her sUsM, and mofgleiy her femwd. Iq
8h<»t» lite nodisb deist denies tfaeaiillieffily» ead eie»
esales Ike yec e pts ef the Bihle» beeaase it pnoUhits the
iM tti gep cc ef his passioas;. while, hy his afiectetiiii of
homtm^ and scsrtM«eat» he passes thrsagh iifc wiliifc the
ehaiacterof an acoeiii|ilished gsntieam* thesigh desSi^
tale of that modest dignitiji mbkk ever aocompaaies

TeH nie» ye deists; d» joo JB gew a ouoly pe r asc the
Bible for iastmctiott ? Do yon aet rather giatiiy ymu
fMt, by crilieistBg tha€ sacied wilnnM^ and r qi eic t
when you find a passage which yon eaa waip seas to
exercise yoor wit at the expeaoe of rsvektiaft? Are you
hot ashamed of such artifioe, exerted to deceive others,
and excite their admiradoa of your sagacity, while thus
opposin g the leeble gli mmer of yowr maaMi to the meri-
dian glory ef divme troth 1

Weie we to trace this fSuihiottable infiddity to its
aaorce, we should find that it originated, in an injud^

140

«;ioa» mode of education. lodulgeiice in infiuicy kadk
to foppery in youth and pride in manhood : an inoidi-
iiate gratification of the appetites deiNaves the liieart»
and bewilders the imagination: a continnai soccessioa of
fllicit pleasures corrupts the morals ; — ^the next tdbep is
scepticiimy which leads to atheism. Glad to catch at
any twig that will save him from sinking into the ooean
t>f reflection, the voluptuary, who dare not mui hU
naked heart aiane, lulls his conscience in the «^K»rific
gloom of annihilation, til) remorse, rending the delusive
veil of infidelity, ezhil>its to his terrified mind the infer-
nal brood of vices, hatched and cherished by depravity.

A modem prelate, alike respectable for his eloquence
and piety, says, ** Whoever has passed any time in the
world, and has observed with any degree of attention
the manners, the habits, the prejudices, and the reason-
ings, of those who are enemies to Christianity, must
have discovered that infidelity is in general a disease not
of the understanding, but of the heart. By far the
greatest part of those who reject revelation are against
the gospel because the gospel is against them ; — ^because
it condemns ^d prohibits certain practices, gratifica-
tions, and pursuits, which they are determined not to
relinquish. It is not, in short, the want of evidence^

141

but the want of prineiple, and of a fair and upright
n&aid, which niaked tfaem sceptics and unbelievers* ' *

Sbaftsbury, Mandville, and the free-thinkers of the
last age, artfully endeavoured to depreciate religion, by
asserting that it was merely an invention of statesmen, to
overawe the credulous multitude, and render them obe-
dimt to the laws. For this purpose it was necessary that
it should be connected with morals; but the infidels of
the present day have gone farther, and, like the impious
Spinoza, contend that religion is subversive of morality !
It is indeed astonishing to contemplate the pains taken
by atheists to subvert the Christian doctrine. The interr
course of the sexes is considered by them as liable to no
restriction, but merelv a matter of choice ; and conse-
quently they condemn marriage as a tyrannic restriction
of the human will.

Such is*the accommodating nature of this fashionable
epicurism, tliat it excludes abstruse reflection, and leaves
the miiid, disencumbered with intrusive thought, vacant,
and ready to embrace every joy. Hence the voluptuary
will ever be its strenuous advocate.

• Vide a Charge delivered to the Clergy of the dioccs2 of
London, io 1799 aad 1799. '

142

StiU> h&treftst, there sve myriads <rf nagidsrbei^
intiusgiei^inetropc^is, whose principles^ being fowkM
on the Christian religioiiy enable them to lead indife-
Bushed lives, in direct oppositicm to the pvactiee of the
maltitade. How long these singidar mertab will petmt
m their vafiuhionable opposition to the refined sen-
snality of die times -b uncertain. Their obstioaey wM.
not submit to embrace the doctrine of materialism vaA
eternal sleq> — they believe in a future state of superior
lu^ppiness to that of this world; and they think they
ought to act up to die dignity of man, by a -love of
justice. These opinions they have adopted fiom an
almost obseiete bode called tiie Bible ; and they often
nver that it communicates more true knowledge of the
moral state and relative duties of man than ail the
ingenious and fimciiul systiems of human invention.
This superstitious attachment to truth and revelation is
the more unpardonable in the eyes of modem philoso-
pher^ and their votaries, when brought in competition
with the sidilime nnd witty productions of Vokime,
Eousseau, Home, Gibbon, Volney, and their abettors.

But those odd mortsds who have persisted in o^kmi-
tion to the persuasions of human wisdom will, to some
fanatics, appear Mameable in another respect. For
M'hile they reject the theories of metftphysics, they also

143

SKi^Md a fttttfeipatioB m ^ Qfgi» of endiiMiwDi.' They
look «p to Ifce Deky with filial it f fe w a c c wmd love, aad
li&Te DO idea of htiag UrnSeA into tiw lov« of |Nety»
Hence they endeavoor to keep in that medhun of mo-
raiityy Ifaat equqiOMe of l«itfa» that iteers dear of die
seytfa and chaiyhdis bodi of raoden jiAifMofMNie^ aad
AJiodeni fnuditkim*

'^ No wild cDibnuAst ever yet coald reftt
Till half the world was, like himself, possessed.
Philosophers, who darken and put out
Eternal tratli with everlasting donM ;
CIrardi quacks ) with passions under no comiaand,
Who filltlie world with doctrines contraband ;
DiscovVers of they know not wiiat, confinM
'Within no bounds— the blind that lead the blind ;
Fresh oonfidence the speculatist takes
From evVy hairbrain'd proselyte 1m makes ;
And therefore print»**him9elf but half deceiv'd"-^
Till others have the soothing tale believ'd."

Our deislieal writers, like the French theophilan*
frdpistSy first cuU some df the purest moralls from
Cinristianity, and afterwards rnigratefally depreciate it$
benign influence, and stigmatise it as tlte cause of war
and contention among mankind. By such piausibleas-
sertionsy and their artful adulation of human perfec-
tion, those innovators have insinuated themselves into
the fiivour of the fashionable world. They ** spuak

144

tmooth thmgSj andfropkeajf deceUs," for the

tion of the great, whoae examf^ mast ever have a

powerful influence on the morals of the commanity.

But sai^K)8e» ye laiighter4pving damea» aadphSoso-
phic beaux, that you had discovered a combination of
assassins^ ready to lift their empoiso^ed stilettos against
your hearts; would you not shrink? — Such, indeed,
are your instructors in those ingenious principles, ini-
mical to truth. Under the semblance of friendship^
they are your worst enemies — the malignant destroyers
of your present and future happiness I They first de-
prive you of your best hopes by their vain-glorious oppo-
sition of the subtle reflections of reason to the revelation
of the DEITY ; and then, by sarcasms against the im-
perfection of human institutions, endeavour to overturn
the order of civilised society. Investigate their fine-
spun reasonings, and they vanish into air — " into thin
air;'' and, like the delusions of magic — instead of the
superb edifice, the beautifiil and perfumed pavilion of
delight, erected by reason — you will find yourselves
wandering amidst the sulphureous stench, the hideous
pitfalls of error and despair.

145

FEMALE PHILOSOPHERS.

How charniii)^ is divine philosophy !

^ot soar and crabbed, as dull fools suppose,

But musical as is A polio's lute.

-tfC

Tliere is noiliing new under the sun/' was the ob-
-servation of a Jewish sage; but had he lived in- this
s)ge of refinement, lie would probably have embraced
another opinion. Instead of ladies- travelling from the
most distant regions to learn wisdom of him, he might
bave obtained from our fbmalb philosophbrs
some new ideas on the natural equality ej the sexes t

Our fair sages, armed witli the triple panoply of
reason, wit, and beauty, have boldly entered the list
of competition to assert their native rights. Tliey have
already proved to a demonstration, that there is no su-
periority of the niiale over the female sex ; but that the
former^ by some accidental advantage, not content
with equality, had, by a tyrannic asstimption, violated
the jpirtvifeges of the latter.

It is worthy of remark, that tlie fbunder of this new'
sect* like the fabled Luna of old, descended from her

146

.hmiBOBs elevatioB ta caress her &TOiiiile Eadymibn.
£avillers may say, that m this instance she braved Vke
a frail woman/ bat her disciples are convinced that die
.was actuated by the moat philosophic and bei^n phi-
lanthropy ; and thus with inexpressible cnei^ enforced
her precepts by example : ^

^* Strange to tell, she practised wbnt slie jtreac^d/'

Indeetl, it is evident, that she imitated tbe leaned
and delicate Eloisa, and adopted her sublime and ex*
fCcUent sentiments :

i' Let wealth, let bonoriir^ wait tAe wedded c&une ?
Attgttst her deed, aod sacred be her fitaie»
i^ot CtBsar^s enupress would 1 deigo to prove :—
No : make me mistress to the man I love."

But Etoisa^s philosophy had long been neglected bj
the world.; aod though her principles had been adopted
by that generous^and disinterested cla^ of females- called
J^ept-mistresses^ yet it required the genius of a modem
heroine to establish this system. Londoa> which, like
the sun, irradiates the world of science,, cmly required
this sect of female philosophers to claim the palm ia
every kmd of intellectual pre-eminence.

147

TbeUteRuy .productions €£ our fair sages^ and their
polite auxiliaries the modem puilosophists, have
contributed much to the success of the 9ect. A moralist
.whose views of human happiness were bounded by the
love of propriety and rectitude, would be apt to assert,
that the philosophism of the day is the child of sen-
suality, and that its iibettors owe theur success to the
latitude which they give their disciples in the indulgence
of their af^^Mtites. He would contend that the prin-
ciples inculcallsd by. the Monk, and the German plays
and novels of the day, have almost given a mortal
wound to foitish taste and morality* .

Bat to return to our subject. The noble struggles^
for independence so often made by every class of our
fiur countrywomen, from the duchess to the retailer of
oranges ; the curtain lectures of the fumer, and the
liberd epithets and contusions bestowed by. the latter
upon their beloved yokerfellows; seem to prove, that
they have an equal claim to equality* The contest for
equal rights may sometimes be productive of momen-
tary bickerings, but must eventually establish the beoiJi-
tiful claimant in her pristine independence. This event
will .harmonise the passions of both sexes, and, by a
reciprocation €^ endearments^ a nobler affection will
arise,. WomaD^ no longer looking on her partner as

148

superior in talents or resolution, will be equally readj',
liay, perhaps, the first, to defend the honour of botS
if called iii question ; and we may soon expect to* hear
of frequent challenges given by the ladies to that for-
luidable and res|)ectable body of men the fops.

This sect, when perfectly established, will prevent
many litigations; and the malef and female phtliosophers,
being bound by no tie but their own caprice, can, after
a tender intercourse for years, voluntarily separate with-
out the formality of a divorce ! .

The beneficial consequences of these modern refine-
iiients niust be obvious:

** Relations dear, and all the charities

• , ■. •

^ Of father, son, and brother^''

will sooii be forgotten, and, like the Spartan youth, the
rising generation will be the children of the state.

iSuch of our female philoi^tfpheTS as are blest with
high spirits and activity, may with' emulative ardour-
cope with the- men in gymhastic exercises. * They- may -
learn to itin tfie fiery charger,^ wield the firelock,
brandish the sabre ; and demonstrate, by their puissance
and intrepidity, the natural equality of the sexes.

149

Let a young heroine only reflect what an amiable
tigure she will make decorated with a helmet, and
charging the battalions of the enemy at the head of a
squadron of cavalry! Thus, like Minerva herself, the
glorious fair-one will gain the conqueror's wreath ; tfnd if
lier character should be slandered, she can challenge
her calumniator to single combat/

Those fair philosophers who are not anibitious to
sliare the " pride, pomp, anH circumstances of glorious
v^'ar," may rival their male competitors^ in the softer arts
of peace, such as navigation and agriculture. How
characteristic of the delicacy of the sex must it be to
see a lovely woman steering a ship in "a st'ofni^ and vo-
xriferating through a speaking trumpet to the sailors,
while the tempest howls

" WithdeafDiag cTatnoor \n the sUppVy shrouds !""
Or in husbandry, how delightful must the chanwing

* The idea of the equality of th.e texes is truly ridiculous.
Man is the.na|aral protec(<ir of wtMiian; and .the .shade of sor
boiT.dioatioji \% so deri<;^ite as to be almost imperceptible.. i.ct
the fair-sex meekly eojo^y their privileges, aod leave imperial

. mao in possession /)f^ his preregjiUves... They may believe a
friend who be^s leave to assure theqi, (bat Yeniis appears more

. amiable encirf;led \vitji ber gettiUf ii^ Al^oerva armed nith
her helm and shields-

130

^rmev appe^ wfafle gnidn^ the pkiog^ Aroag^ the
stubborn fallows^ or directing her kboufers in their
daily tadc!*

la literature, the fiedr-sex have monopolised almost
all the wit and genius of the age. Witness the sublime
instructive novels of the day, in which the iiiir opera-
tors have confused the vision of ^e reader by the oor-
mscations of magk;, and have artfiiliy made the insati-
able craving of the public mind ibr something new
subservient to their philosophic ^culati<Mis* Instead
4>f tlie .unintelligible jargon of the schools, those inge-

• Lavatcr defines the characteristic difference between tire
'fiexcswith great precision. — ** The female," says he ^^ thinks
■wot profoundly ; profound thought is the power of man. Hfo-
men feel more; sensibility is-the po^erof wonuui : men nnst
«inbrace the whole; women-remark individually. Man hcan
the bursting thunder, views the deBtractive bolt with serene
aspect, and stands erect amidst the fearful miyesty of tlie
streaming clouds.; woman trembles at the lightning and the
•voice of 4iistant thunder, and shrinks into henelf, or sinks
into t^e arms of man* A tay of light is singly received by
man ; woman delights to view 4t through a prism, in all its
dazzling colours : she contooiplatfS the rainbow as the pro-
mise of ,peace ; he e:rtends his en^iring eye oyer the whole
■horizon. Woman laughs, aian smilesj woman weeps, man
4'emaiQ8 silent. Woman is in anguish when man weeps, and in
.^es|»a?r when man is in anguish $ yet 4h^ has often mere faith
than main'*

151

'BMUrt seiibes kave ctmningly nuide fommiee the ▼••
Icicle of sophkiryi Thiis the thoughtless reader is^al*
lured by the rich pnwpect of a terrestitel ptt»<tise, And
caught by the blrdtiilie ef ddusknu

Oar modern Sappho has successfully employed her
'talents to Ihe'cdification of the age. May the lovely
daughters «f Britain never imitate the practical philo-
sopliy lof the voluptuous syren t

We have reason to apprehend that the wor^ks of Ba-

<^n, Newton» Locke» and Boyle, will be neglected for

th^ elegant conceptions of our fair writers in this *' age

of rsason/^ How puerile are the poetic flights of

Sfaakspeare^ Dryden, Milton, and Pope, to the in^iring

melody, and ebmte sentmeitiSf of our modem poet-

-esses! How vapid the productions of Swift, Butler,

and Stenie, when compared with the effervesence of

female geniosi and how inconclusive the morality of

Addison, Steel, and Johnson, when opposed to those

.pers[ncuonSvemanations of mind «o liberally diffused by

our female philosophers for the improvement of their

disciples!

Tbe virtuous woman, who, in conformity to the wise
institutions of her ancestors, is obedj[cnt to her husband.

152

md presides with maternal solicitude over ber eH3dfni»
inculcating the purest principles of mon^ty» must «p-
•pear' an -^insipid • being t;oni pared y^iih those spitited
dames who share with their male friends- ail 'thbse pl^
Burable indulgences which set propriety and religion at
defiance. ... • i . i • ♦ . f

' > ApDong the jn^ovements of 1 his^ ehl%htefted age; may
be reckoned the general practice .of mothers in the
higher classes, who intrust their infants to the' care of
hireling nurses. This iashionaMe violatioif of- maternal
duty generally proceeds from indolence, abd a desire to
be disencumbered 'in the pursuit of favourite amuse-
ments; but surely every^niother, endued with that ex-
quisite; sensibility which is the. ornament of virtnous
women, wHl suckle her child unless prevented by indis-
position.

. ' • ■:.'•■' ^ .:. '

Tliat the female votaries of Minerva, however,
should be exempted, not only, from this, but cverj
other domestic doty, is a privilege to which they are
entitled by their superior. endowments. Would it not
be prejudicial to the interests of science, were a Mr
astronomer necessitated to- descend from the contemp-
lation of tlie heavens to chant a lullaby 1 What an irre-
parable ii^iury would it be to public morals, if tbe

153

•i^smate tnnslatorsof cAtf«/e and elegant German dramas
were obliged, ta attend to the nursery! Nor co^ld it
'Tatioiially b^ expcfcfdd, that suclj of our fair phitoso-
pfaers as were engaged in metapkyskal, or ethical re^
search, could, amid their abstraction, recollect that
such beings 'as children existed. Indeed, those literary •
ladies are fully entitled to commit their oflspring to the
protection of others, a^d thus act in coufonnity to their
other innovations. . .

. V

Lady Mary Wortley Montague wa3 an advocate for

sending children to nurse,. and she defends her opinion

^with her usual wit and vivacity. " You tell," says she,

in one of her letters, "that our friend Mrs. is-

blessed with a son, and that her husband insists upon
her sncklin*' it herself. I grant that nature has fur-
nished the mother with milk to nourish her child; but
' I maintain at the same time, that if she can find better
milk elsewhere, shie ought to prefer it without hesitation.
Indeed, if she was A buiRoni sturdy woman, who lived
on plain food} took regular exercise, eBJt)yod proper re-
turns of»rast^ and Wi^ free from violent passions, she
n'.iglit''be a g6od nurse for her child'; .but as matters
stand, I do verily think that the niilk 6f a good comely^
vcow/ who feeds quietly in her mijadow,' -never devours
• rig<>uts, aor drinks ratifia, nor frets at quadrille, nor

154

^shs up till time in the monuiig dated wkh gain^ or de-
jeeled with lo89— 1 do thmk that >lhe milk ci sadt i
eoiw, lor of a none that xoiaes as near it as pes^k,
would be likelj to nourish they ouBg'iiqjaiie JBuch bettei
than hen.*^

These fipiightly vemarks are ceftaiiiljr just; But wby
should mothers lead such dissolute liiies, as incapacitafes
them to supply their offipring with wholesome nutri-
ment 1 Thb immoral deviation is not eonfioed to high
life, for even tradesmen's wives, -nay, the wives of me-
chanicsy resign their infants without scruple to the aie
of strangers; and the natund consequence is that es-
trangement, and a negligence in the fulfilment of the
:^ial duties, «o observable in the youth of both sexes.

Lavater observes, tiiat *' without religion man is a dis-
-eased creature, that would persuade himself he is weli*
vand needs no physician; but w^aaaim without religion is
raguig and monstrous. A woman with a beard is not so
disgusting as a woman who apts the fioe-tfainker; — her
•sex is formed, to piety and cdigioii.'' How inimkal are
such sentiments to the views and the wishes of -our nM>-
^ern heroines, who» aping the confident air of the pro-
«titute, and iexposiog theur sahunandrine yirttie to the or-
deal of masquerades, theatres, and excursions with their.
«iimons, boldly overleap the boundaries of decotuml

1S5

Tli« fidlolni^ dUegue 'between ft whty sotbortaid m
ienMde philosopher, will shew ^ propriety of joimg
4adie& indulging in metaphysical flpeeulatians. *' Madame

*deV tdid me «he believed nothing. I tdd Madame

de V— — *it might be her principle, bat I was fiore it

could not be for her interest to level the outworks,

vrithout which! co«ld not conceive how such a citadel

as hers could be defended. That these was not a more

dangerous thing in the wodd .than for a beauty to be a

-deist. We are not adamant, said I, taking hold of her

hand ; and there is need of all restraints till age in his

own time steals in and lays them on -us. But, my dear

•4ady, said I, kissing her hand, ^tis too — ^too soon. I

declare I>had the credit all over Paris of unperverting

Madame de V » She affirmed to Mons. D ^ and

the Abbe6 M*— -, that in one half hour I had said
^more for revealed religion than aU the Encyclopedia
liad said against it"

One of Ae most egregious iblUes of the present age
isj that afiected politeness by which coxcombs cherish
the ridiculous assumption of^eqoality in the other sex.
Alas, ye lovely •^young women 1 your obseqnious and eH-
ligkUmd beaux, who %voirid raise yon^o a ^tastic
.pie*em]oenee by the depredation of man, aim only at
'yoardestmctioii. They first;, through the medium oi^

156

flattery, iusinuate themslelyes into your favour; tbe^f
extol the superior beauties, finer sensibiiities, and nobler
virtues, of woman ; tbey expatiate od the happiness
arising from an unlimited freedom of thought and
action; and >vhile they assert tie equality,' they efiect
the seduction of the 'credulous 'fair. Th^y hold the
Circean cup of phHosophie sophistry to your lips, yoa
drink, and giving a loose to your passions, indulge in
sensuality, till, when too late, you find that your mo-
' nieutary elevatiod was like being placed on the piunacle
of ambition, whence you are pi^eipitated headlong int(^
• the abyss of misery.

Ye amiable maidens, the 'ornament and glory of so-
ciety, beware of the insiduous suggestions of delusive
fanc}' ! Now, while your hearts bound with gaiety, and
vour beauties illumine the so*rial circles, re£ef:t that on
ycittr virtue depends the happiness* of the community.
Remember that the duties of woman are comprised in
her tenderness to her relatives, as a daughter, a ^ife,
and a mother. Reflect, that the influence of a virtuous
woman h absolute over the niind of man, and that her
endearing manners, hei- modest smiles, are irresistibly
■ eloquent ; that to arrogate an equality with tlie other
' sex will render -you ridiculous and tmanliable ; and that
due respect for yourselves, sanctioned by the unajJTec ltd

(

157

ignify of female chastity, will command « tlic esteem,
sind ensure the admiration^ of mankind.

SEDUCTION.

How abandoned Ts that heart which bulges the tear of inno-
t;ence, and is the cause-*— the fatal canse of overwhelming the
^pQt less. soul ». and planging the yet untainted mind into a sea
.4)f sorrow and repentance! Though born to prptect the fair,

does not man act the pa^t of a demon first alluring b^ his

Iretnptations, and then triumphing in bis Victory?

Sterne. ^

Of all the crimes which contribute to homan infeli-
fixity, seduction is looked upon with the most' favourable
-eye. Even some persons of irreproachable morals seem
to think it a venial offence, nay, merely obedience to
the dictates of nature ! They do not consider that fe-
male chastity is the true foundation of national honour ;
'^nd that licentiousiiess, should it become universal among
lis, would, like an earthquake, overturn the social
edifice* • .:■'

Men of pleasure often triumph over the modest, by a
repetition of those witticisms which ha^e been adopted
us maxims by voluptuaries, from time immemorial. —
But what i^ still more reprehensible, the fair sex, by a

158

Mniper of complaceocyy coanlcDance tlie loose sdlks of"
the libertiiie, wiiile he exdaims^-**^ I bate a pnide ! give
me a girl whose freedom of dies^ and mien dedarea
mind disposed to gaiety and pleasutie: — surely it can he
no crime to love a pretty girl : — ^were not the sexes cre-
ated for matiial love I'' ** Ye mtlingsl Suppose you
rambled through a flower garden^ would you wantonly'
pluck the beautiful blooms, and after having gazed at
each a moment, and inhaled their baln^ odours, cast
them at your feet to wither T' *^ No, certainly; — n^
man of taste would behave so Imitishly.'' Then just
such a monster is the-sensmdist who robs the virgiu <tf
Jier honour — then flings her from hbarms *Uke a-de*
tested 9m f'BBd leaves her to perish* Yet this votary'
of Venus is admitted to an intercourse with women of
rank and character, who affect to consider these ble-
mishea merely as^spota in 4be sun* .

Let any man wha thoughtlessly proceeds in &e career
ei iutrigue, pause a moment, and laying his hand upon>
his breast, question himself — ^ Can I bear the idea of
my sister,, or au^ female relation^, being seduced V —
No: — the. enormity of the dishonour instantly presents
itselC and every generous and delicate feeling: rises in
cipposition to it* This i& natural — this is nobler and on
the sspie princip^e^.po man has a riglit to i^educe a wo^

159

num of eten the Idwest das8» She alio bas a iatber^ »
Ibvother. or a kinsman, to whom her innocence and hap-
IwMssaredeml Whyv would you add to the mass of
Hiunan mnery by her seduction — why detach a bhiine-
less Individual from society, aQdxondemn her to asso-
ciate with those wretched outcasts^ who, in their turn,.
prqr on thei»betnyers^t

The man who gains the affections of an amiable yotm

woman, and, forgetful that he b her natural protector,
sacrifices her chastity to his capricious-desires, is a more,
detestable monster tiiau the guard who robs the tra-
Teller whom' he was paid to protect ; — more brutal than^
the ferocious tyger^. who instinctively destroys the un-
lesisting deeK»

Is it Jiot superlatively treacherous in the seducer to
addfcfss hb mistress in a voic^ attuned by tendettiess, .
and with the smile oflove^ at the very moment he
aoeditates her^ ruin I

Pause and reflect, ye generous and brave^youth of

Britain, ere you violate the chastity of the maiden — it

' b her only treasmre,. a«d renders her truly desirable*.

Conscious virtue gives lustre to her eye, delicacy to her

demeaaous; it adorns her charming features with *the

160

smile of modesty, attunes her affecting tdicc to tht
social affections, and renders her atoDce the ornament,
tlie pride, and tlie delight of society^ Why would yoa
Teduce this angelic creature to gtiiit and -wretchedness T^-^
Ah ! love, but do not betray her ! -

Commiseration for an unhappy young lady si\ggested
t]iese reflections ; but lier OAvn simple tale will best il-
lustrate tlie necessity of an adiierence to virtue./ A
4'egard for the survivors of the catastroplie requires that
the characters should be. disguised under fictitious
•names.'. ^ . j . . . ■ . .

Tlie Histeri/ of Eliza,

Eliza was the dauditer of a cler*3'man in Devdn-
shire; she was educated under the eve of her mother,
who, as wcH as her father, was particiilarly solicitous to
form her mind to' the love of rectitude. She wds
docile and good-natured ; and as siie grew up» tlie
beauty of her person and her elegant attainments were

the delight of her friends. In the sixteenth year of her
age her ihther died, leaving his widow and thr^ daugh-
ters iu' possession of a small estate.

Soon after this mournful event, William Benson, the
'^Aon of a rich farmer^ was captivated by the tharms of

161

Xliza, and declared Lis passion with all the simplicity- ol
honourable love. As he was verv amiable, he soon in- "
^piFed his mistress with reciprocal tenderness, but their
union was deferred on account of their youth an(l
inexperience. < . .

Meanwhile, Miss Anderson, a dfttant relation from
London, paid Mrs. Warner a visit ; in the course of
which she was so much delighted with the conversation
and accomplishments of her cousin Eliza, th^t she pro-
posed to take her into partnership in tlie millinery and
perfumery business. After some hesitation, Mrs. War-
iier agreed to the proposal, but her daughter felt some
reluctance at the idea of a separiation from William.
He heard of her designation with all the anguiish of true
love ; and in an interview he besought her with tears in
liis eyes to relinquish the offer of her friend, and crown
his wishes by- marriage. Eliza listened and wept; §Iie
told him that obedience to the wlii of an affectbnate
mother was an indispensable duty; — bat she assured
him of her constancy. They parted with mutual vows
of fidelity, unconscious that it was at last adieu ; and
Eliza soon after>vards accompanied her relative tb
London: * , .-

. For some months after her arrival in the capital,
Eliza's hours glided away in uninterrupted cheerfulness.

162

The variety of castomers, the elegance of the town and
its amusements, aild the kind attention of Miss Ander-
son, cottj))ensated the lovely girl for the relinquishment
of the peaceful rural bowers where she had so often
tasted the sweets of domestic felicity, and listened to
the voice of her tender William. She kept up a corres-
pondence with him and her mother, which served at
once to amuse and enliven her leistire'bours.

£li2a Warner was a heauliful young woman; she had
now attained her eighteenth year, and her graceful form
was moulded by the hand of perfection. Her blue eyes
effused the lustre of health, her complexion was deli-
cately fair, and her soft voice irresistibly affecting. As
litr cousin'^ shop was in Bond-street, it becaine the re-
sort of several men of fashion, some of whom tried
various arts to seduce the lovely girl, but her modest yet
dignified behaviour abashed and awed even the brazen
\isagCof the libertine.

A fever which raged in the neighbourhood seized Miss
Anderson, who died after an illness of four days, leaving
Eliza at once mistress of a small property and unpro-
tected. Her anguish for the loss of a beloved relative
\\j& only the pnFJu^ ib« grealer nlsfortcnes. Her friend-
less Ktuation, which ought to haw commanded the j^ity

163

and esteem, only served to raise the dishonourable

_ *

hopes, of the debauchee. The pretty milliner of Bond-
street was oflen the toast at an adjacent tavern, nor
could her utmost circumspection escape the shafts of
calumny.

Many were the artifices of dissipated young men of
fashion to allure the lovely Eli^a from the path of recti-
tude. Her virtue, like a shield,* defended her from the
attacks of flattery^ the glauces of wantonness, and the
sighs of desire. But, though neither manly beauty, ac-
complished manners, nor all the splendour of wealth,
could subvert her virtue, she was betrayed through a
much more insidious and fatal medium — the mental can-
tharides of modern philosophy, as administeiea in novels
and other popular productions of genius. Deceived by
the sophistical reasoning of certain adepts in depravity,
slie was taught to consider an ideal jmiice as paramount
to the social affections; consequently any man possessed
of greater merit than William was entitled to the pre-
ferebce in her esteem.

While she indulged this pernicious opinion, the ac-
complished and witty Feignlove professed an honoura-
ble attachment, and as his affectation of passion had aU
the appearance of sincerity, the deluded Eliza listened

164

to him with complacency, forgetful of her rustic lover,
William. Overcome by the soothing eQtreaties of her
admirer, her bosom palpitated with the fondest emotions,
and the treacherous Feignlove triumphed over her virtue. '

On reflection, the consciousness of dishonour roosed^
ber to phrensy, and her seducer, to allay her pertur-
bation, promised to man'y her. Day after day did
Eliza urge her betrayer to lead lier to the altar, whil^
lie constantly framed some plausible pretext for delay.

Meanwhile she received letters from- her mother and
her lover, entreating her to return, to the country : these
proofs of their friendship osily served to render her
wretdiedoess more intolerable. She threw them from
her in an agony of desperation; and Feignlove, who
entered the apartment at the moment, and perceived
the cause of lier grief, hastily perus id them, and com-
mitted them to the flames. Eliza importuned him in.
the most solemn manner to make her reparation by
marriage. She mentioned her having reluiqi^ished her .
^uver and friends for his sake : he appeared affected,
calmed her mind by promises, but left her house vi'ith
a determination never to retuiU !

Alarmed at his absence during the whole of the next
dav, she sent her maid-servant to his lodgings, who, on

165

. enquiry, found that lie had removed to .another quarter
of the town, and .that his trunks were to he sen/t in a
hackney-coach at nine o'clock . the following Qiglit. —
Maddened by this intelligence^ the unhappy. Eliza has-
tened to end her miser}' by the destruction of h^r seduc-
er and herself. With this determination she left the
shop to the care of her servant^ >yent to tlie' former lodg-
ings of Feignloye, apd when the coachman came to take
away the trunks, she bribed him to convey her secretly
into her lover s apartments. The coachman, who looked
on the adventure as a mere frolic or intrigue, conducted
tlie business with so . nmch; address, that he conveyed
Eliza into Feignlove's bed-chamber. , .

After she had remained about two hours in conceal-
meut, she heard the voice of her, reducer in the. adjacent
room. He had invited a number of gay. young inmates
to supper, and as they sat round the festive board vaimt-
ing of their conquests over female credulity, F.eignlovo
amused them with the history of his .recent amour, aud
' concluded with saying, " She is a.chari^ung.girl,. but 1
was completely satiated : let her now cpusole herself in
the arms of her rustic lover. She is not destitute,, hav-
ing a small shop ; which is a lucky circumstance,, fgtr I'm
so confoundedly involved in debt that I couUJ not Ivaye
niade any provision for her/' •* D -n it, Jacl?," cried

166

one of the compaDj. '' why did you not introduce me?"
** No, faith," rejoined Feignlove, " I durst not have
nade that experiment: I really rejoice that my conneci
tioq with her is ended, for her temper is so violent, that
I sometiines trembled for my personal safety in her pre-
louce.

Eliza, who had listeoed with agonising attention, felt
her bnin fired with a sudden phrensy. She burst out
6f the bed-chamber before the astonished company, rusL-
ed forward to the table, and seizing a carving-knife, ex-
claimed, V Well might you tremble, villain! — well might
yoii fear in the presence of her you had injured ! for tbe
vengeance of violated honour now pursues you!*'

She then sprung upon Feignlove, plunged the knife
into his heart, and instantly turned the point upon her-
self, but she was disarmed and secared. Feignlove ex-
pired in a few muiutes, begging her pardon with his last
brealfa. The phrensy of the wretched Eliza now sub-
sided into melancholy, and she was removed to Bedlam,
wbere, alas! no phyaiciaii " could mnisier medicine to
her mind diseased r

While these calamities bcfel Eliza, her lover, Mr.
Benson, was suddenly enriched by a legacy of two thou-

167

' sand pounds, left bim by an uncle. Overjoyed at his
good fortune, be hastened to Mrs. Warner, and prevailed
upon her to consent to his union with his ever-dear
Eliz^. He faired a post-ch^use, and hastened 16 the ca-
pital : on his arrival, he went to Eliza's shop, but she was
not there. Her maid-servaat, who had %vaited with
piunfal soUcitudefor the return of her mistress, informed
fann that she had been missing about a fortnight, and
was prevaSed on by his entreaties to discover all she.
knew about the seduction of his beloved mistress. The

» unhappy young man was overwhelmed with afBiction ;
biit, though an impenetrable gloom of mystery huug over
her fate, he resolved to discover her if possible. His
fond heart still languished for her, degraded as she was [
He took lodgings in the bouse of a distant relation, who
good-naturedly soothed bis grief, and accompanied him
to view the curiosities of London.

After having visited Westminster-abbey, St. Paurs«
and the Tower, they proceeded to Bedlato^ where they
surveyed the insane with commiseration* Their guide
througlithis asylum of misery rendered the pitiable scene
still more ajfecting, by relating anecdotes of serexal of
the patients; and as they proceeded to a remote apart-
ment, he said, ^'We are nowgomgto see an object trulj
entiUed to our pity. The patieut is a beautiful young

168

ivoman who was seduced, and abandoned by ber seducer
iK'hom she 'pursued, and, in the madness of reveuge,
murdered. She was a most lovely creature when broD^bt
hiibefa few days ag'o ; but, as she will take scarcely any
'ijoiitisfamenty she is reduceil to a skeleton, notwithstand-
ing V)ur'ckre.' Poor thing, she is almost continually talk-
^iflg-i^ead softly, thSft we may observe lier undisturbed."
^WilliiiA MtVk suddcHquaim^ and his heart sickened at
the reedll^ctioft dfhis lost Eliza, while his ej'es glistened
t^ith'SympatUyfor the sufferer,' '

♦• ■

Tliey eiitered the ' room so silently, that the maniac,

who.w^s sieat^d on a chair "with her back towards the

tloorj did •Hijft pertfeive theiil. She appeared as if talk-

Mig'taanolijeii'perSbn, 'with her nght hand extended in

the att^cide of enh>eaty. '* Ah* ! my dear reignlove,""

<^rled'Sh^m -a foW tremulous' voice, ** I see— J see the

wound in your iside !— ^iorgive me ! — ^but why did you

deceive me l"'**^ Gracious Providence," exclaimed Wil-

.iiam, '* it is my Eliza 1'' The maniac turned her head:

;jiiLit '^rfs,-inde|bd", Eliza : — but" so altered, tlfat her lover

fttft^ed-^jack as^ If from a spectre ! — Her once blooming

-i'Cfelfekr^'as pale^ier eyes were sunk— her Ii|>s livid — the

igl^afe of mood^' melancholy frowned on her once

,{}aQtdli#^M serene brow. She viewed William with a

vwiixf'-aiid? vacasit glare : — he approached, and a feeble

169

ray of recognition for a moment animated her visnge.

She started up with a smile of ccstacy, and outstretched

arms, but. in a moment ber countenance changed — she

uttered a shriek of horror, and sunk back into the chair.

William supported her in his arms, while his generous

heart was bursting with sorrow to meet his beloved

Uliza thus unexpectedly — deprived of honour — and of

reasou-^and sinking to the grave 1 While he strove to

restore her to life, the tears of faithful love gushed from

Lis eyes, and besprinkled her face as he bent mournful! v

: over her. She revived for a moment — opened' her eyes,

gazed affectionately on his face, and instantly expired.

Medical aid was called in, but life was gone— for ever

-gone — ^beyond the power of resuscitation.

THE TEMPLE OF MODERN PIlILOiSOPHY.

.. A visioir.

» • • • _ .

Ruminating the otlier evening upon the numerous

discoveries which tlie ingenious are daily riiaking^hi* phi-
losophy, I was led by a train of thought W an anticipa-
tion of the ftiture fame of our sages and Jiterati. While
I continued absorbed in these reflections I fell asleep, and
a wonderful vision presented itself to my imagination.

Methoogjit I found myself travelling on a wide road,
accompanied by several persons of both sexes, \yhose

iro

.looks betra3fed ardour and impatience. As they pr<^
ceeded, I found by tlidr conveis^tion ^at they weie

. going to the Temple of A(odeni Pbiio90]Ay; tb receive
from the Goddess t)ie reward of their services. I Mt an
inclination to turn back, from a cod^ciousDesA that I had
done nothing to merit her iayoUr; biit my companions
emted my curiosity, by describiog the magnificence of

. the Temple and the benignity pf the Goddess, insomuch
that I resolved to proceed.

We^oon arrived at the entrance of the Temple, which
was grand beyond description. Triumphal arches,
adorned with iestoOd^ and dedicated to the hopont of

VOLTAISB, BOLINGBBQKB, ShAFTESBITRT, ItOtTS-

sbav. Hums, and Gibbon, led to the portico, whicb
was supported by the most magnificent columns of white
marble ; they were qf the elegant Corinthian order. The
portico was open, emblematic of the philanthropy of the
new philosophy, who unfolds her mysteries to the human
race. ^

My companions^ who had diluted during our journey
with all the eagerness of competition, were now silent. —
A sabred awe seemed to pervade the assembly, as we
slowly advanced into the body of the Temple. ^ vast
azure curtainof silk bespangled mt\\ diamopds, reflect-

iri

ing.Che rays of several lustre; which iUaminated the lofty
doiii£» was suddenly raised^ and we beheld Philosophy
seated on a throne of gold, adorned with gjems, *' in all
the Imes reflected Ught ctga gwe*" She. was a majestic
figure ; her countenance exhibited the delicate bloom of
youth, digged with the intelligence of nper years, and
enliyoied by a seductire «nilo that ftscinated the be-
liolder. Her robe was pur^ile ; she wore a crown of
gold, inscr&ed with the words Nscbssity, Reason,
YiBTUB, in the three prio^tive ccriouis of nature. On
. her r%ht hand sat Pkis>e, adorned^ with jewels, and
inflated with thf idea of self-imp>rtanoe ; on her left.
Vanity appeared in a garment of many colours, conti-
nually varying h^r posture, and viewing herself, with
smiles, in a mijrror.

Befo;« the throne stood Sophmtey; whose robe
changed its hue every moment ; an insidious smile played
over her features, and she held in her right hand a cup
£lled with intoxicating nectar. FASHION stood behind
Sophistry, with her eyes turned alternately on the god-
dess and her votnries.

The wall of the ti^mple, behmd the throne, ym^ com-
posed of one.entire prisnuitic substance, through w^ich
the most enchanting peiq^ctive views delighted the ey<$»

172

' Shady groves, sanny glades, trees bendicg with fruitage,

. • • •

flowers of variegated bloonl, clear -fountains, sprightly

cascades, embellished with sunshine from an unclouded

« .V

sky, presented a most inviting paiadise.

AVe gazed with mute admiration : the Goddess. waved
.her silver sceptre, and instantly, the Temple was filled
with harmony. . The music was quite in -the ^odeni
taste, of that lively kind which excludes tlie strong pas-
•sions,, and excites to mirth by a gentle titillation. Philo-
sophy again waved her sceptre ; the music ceased ; and,
while our bosoms were thrilling with pleasurable sensa-
tions, she thus addressed us: —

" My beloved votaries! welcome, thrice welcome to
all the delights of wisdom ! You shall all participate the
bounty of Philosophy; but the metaphysician, as the
most profoundly versed in my arcana, is entitled to the
most distinguished honours. Sophistry ! lead the vene-
rable Kant to my throne ; I long to reward a veteran,
who has so often contended against my enemies."

The sage was led forward by Sophistry,. who presented
her cordial to his lips. Having taken an exhilarating
.draugliti he thus addressed Philosophy :.—r .

■><■

Great Goddess, who hast bieen adoVed in e'veiry age
under ^different names, behold ah uged man, who, for a

173

series of years^ has studied the mysteries. Like thy
sidorers among the ancients, I have described thee as the
ohild of Nature ; and, by inculcating the doctrine of.
necessity, I Iiave den^onstrated, that it is to thee alone
^Te are to look for the deyelopement of human faculties;
that under thy influence the morals of society are in a
state of progressive improvement towards tlmt perfect iln-
lity which is attainable by reason. The simplicity of
this system excludes future retribution, and I have im^
perceptibly induced numbers of proselytes to consider
thee as the first and only fahr. Convinced of the pro-
pensity of the human mind to superstition, and awure of
the charms of novelty, I denominated thy doctrine the
Critical Philosophy, as one that investigated the iraper-
fections of all other institutions. . Finally, O Goddess !
I have argued, that with thy aid the generations of man- ,
kind will attain perfection. Thy haiidmaid. Sophistry,^
h:V5 often visited and inspired me with sublime and pro^
/(EJMWflf ideas; and, with the aid of the witty who have
• become proselytes to thy system, I hope to establish thy .
dominion over mankind. Myriads of Jlluminati,r:oi
both sexes, irradiate the Continent, and the people of
Britain seem well inclined to tbejadoption of thy pr^epts;
It must be the study of thy disciples to eftect arevol^tipa ,
in morals: and,. by indulging the humativpassipns ^ijid

-appetites, persuade the ^lations that pkasu^e i^theipeT

■^' ■ ' ..'■■■'.»'■

ward oftJiv. votaries." ' -

174

When the Philosopher ceased, t6e Goddess smfled
vfilh ineffable affection, and, extending her right hand,
the sage kissed it with the utmost devotion. Sophistry'
then led htm to a seat ori the right side of the' tiirone,
where he immediately sunk into slumber.

The next person singled from the crowd was the re-
doubtable dramatist, KotzSbub. There was a wild
and impetuous ardour in his e^e, the effect of an efier*
vescent genius. He came forward with a confident look,
like a man of the world, who considered effi-onteiy as a
proof of his good-breeding. Sophistry offered him her
newly-replenished cup ; but he declined it, and, with an
arch smile, whispered, " No, my dear friend, I have so
long been accustomed to quaff your nectar, that it has
become insipid to me ; but I have persuaded thousands
to drink so deeply of it as to produce complete intoxica-
tion."

He then looked up to Philosophy with a vivacious air,
and thus expressed his pretensions to her favour: —

" All-beauteous idol, behold thy warmest advocate,
who comes to lay the wreath of genius at thy feet. Tis
to thy irresistible influence, O Philosophy ! that t owe
the success of my endeavours to immortalize Europe ! I

175

have disseminated thy doctrine among the higher classes
of tnankindy many of whom have adored thee as their tn-
telarj divinity ; by lAy ridicule of religion and the artful
exhibition of sensuality, under the gnise of nobleness of
mindy I have at ouce effected the depravation of taste
and morals. In Germany, France, and England, my
dramas have, in co-operation with deism and atheism,
turned the current of popular opinion in thy favour.
In France I found but little difficulty to establish my sen-
timents, as that nation has ever preferred pompous pre-
cession's and extravagant ideas to simplicity and good
sense ; but in England I met, and still continue to
meet, with several obstecles, among a people, wha
have hitherto been accustomed to consider the pas-
sions as the auxiliaries of Virtue. The genius of my
translators, however, has partly triumphed over the
obstinate taste of their countrymen, and prejudice is va-
nishing before thy effulgence.''

The Goddess replied, '' My dear Kotzebue, thou hast
been an active and indefatigable servant : — ^receive thy
reward.'' She then touched him with her sceptre, and
his. raiujent was suddenly changed to a purjple robe, be~
studded with brilliants. Fasliion then led him to a seat
beside tliat of his countryman.

176

Several oth<?r candidates for reward now came fot-
M'urd, among whom I recognised Paine, and a celebrated
modern Lyrist. The Goddess gave them all a most gra-
cious reception ; but she conferred particular hononrs on
the facetious bard. " Welcome/' said she, •* my witty,
my incomparable son ! to thy genius am I indebted for
the progress of my po\yer in Britain. Thy more thau
Orphean lyre has transformed many who were formerly
discreet into satyrs of dissipation. Fashion, crown thy
favourite poet with his well-earned laurel, and let the
wreath be sufiicicntly thick to defend his venerable head
from the cane of an insolent adversary. Place him beside
his illustrious compeer Kotzebue.''

.A whimsical-looking individual, apparently intoxicated,
now approached the throne. I discovered that he was a
Senator, who had written a Romance which was prejudi-
cial to thtt cause of virtue. The Goddess beckoned to
Sophistry, who cotiducted him to a seat beside the
Poet.

* • *. .

1 ., • ■ • • •

A party of females now entered tlie Temple. — ^Tbeir
dress was in the extreriie of thie mode; each wore a
wig, and seemed to take a pride in the exposure of, the
neck and bosom. Que of the train bore a standard.

177

with this inscriptioD, equality of the S£XE3. The
sLir'of self-sufficiency, the broad and scnitmijsiDg st$u%,
the anthoritative brow, and masculine stride, of jtbese
ladies, excited my surprise; and although I did not see
any ofiensive weapons, I ^cied for a moment that they
vrere a detachment of Amazons.

The .Stimdard-bearer thus addressed the Goddess: —
•* We are come, O celestial Philosophy! to worship in
thy Temple; to prefer our vows, and supplicate thy in-
spiration. We have formed a new class of intelligent
beings, and are known by the denomination of Female
Philosofhers. Our enemies have stigmatised us with
the name of Voluptuaries, because we inculcate the un-
restrained indulgence of the passions, and invite mankind
to enjoy the pleasures of life, but the feeble opposition
of our calumniators must shrink into non- existence be-
fore the enchanting deh'gbts which thou Last prepared for
thy votaries. To prove our claim to thy protection, we
have disseminated thy principles by every n^eans which
wit could suggest or gem'us promote. We have written
poems, romances, and novels, for this purpose, and
translated every work that we conceived would tend to
inflame the heart and corrupt t!ie morals of others ; and
we have been successful beyond our most sanguine hopes.

178

It remains for thee, O Moved Philosophy ! torewaidis
according to oar respective merits. ; and when eadi dai-
joant has detailed her achievements, i&thy service^ we
hope that thou w3t at Inrsf place ns upon an eqaslity witb
the other sex, and realise our long^-wished-fbr love of
power."

When this fair orator had concluded her speech, ano-
ther female advanced with a most graceful and theatric
air ; but she was prevented from the exertion of faer elo-
quence by the Goddess, who expressed her approbatioo
of the party with smiles of triumph. ** Glorious aera!"
she exclaimed; ^' when woman has assumed, her natural
equality, and demonstrated, that * the lave of pU^surt
and the love ofiwai^ predominate in every exhausted
female mind. Yes, my beautiful votaries, you shall be
placed upon an equality with your admirers, who sit at
my rigli| baqd. There is no necessity for each of you to
mention her clainis; for, though. I: have long been con-
vinced of the eloquence of the sex,, aud doubt not that
vour orations on this occasion would fill a folio volume,
I wonld recconunend it to you to reserve your rhetoric
to persuade your husbands, lovers, and maqkind at large,
of my superior title to their devotion."

Although the ladies seemed disappointed at not being
permitted t^ speak suco^ssively^. yet^. when Sopbistiy

tmta

rrg

conducted tliieiii to a seat equally elevated with that of
Ae male philosophers^ and wheo they surveyed the su-
p^-b canopy ahove their heads^ I coold observe their
eyes sparkle with jrfeasurvb. .

These distingubbed &male philosophers being seated^'
Sophistry addressed the motley throng which filled the
wre2L before the throne, and whom I discovered, by their
^scourse, to be Pamphleteers, who had written in favour
of the Goddess.

" Beloved'anxiliaries!'^ cried Sophistry, ** none of yo*r ■
shall g9 ttarewarded. Philosophy is ever beneficent to
faisr adorers. You shall ••..." Here she was interrupted
by a confused noise from without, and a female^ called
Terror, rushed into the Tfemple^ vocif<ftrating; withfran*
tfc gestures,' ** Theenemy i» coming !'" These dreadful
sounds produced dismay throughout the assembly. Even
the Goddess trembled on her throne, and all her worship-
pers seemed thunderstruck* A vivid splendor now. il-
lumined the portieo^ and the next moment Reupqioit
\entered. Herstaturewas^tall, herbountenance maiestic
and serene; a diadem of the three hues^^pf the rainbow
surrounded her head, and her robe was light azure -of
the most delicate tint of the^ celeistial regions, whence she

had descended. On her right appeared her faithful at-

4jyguar-.

180

'tendaot Trutb> who held a buraing-glass in her leA: hand,
and a fieiy sword in her right. The other attendant of
Religion was Morality, who appearejd'on her left, clothed
in white, and holding in her left hand a Bible, into which
she looked with reverential love.

Behgion now aippsoached the -tlirone of her enemy,
and, with a voice -at once melo<tiQus and impressive, thus
addres^d the assembly : — " Unhappy beings ! your en-
mity against me has efiected your own destmction. By
embracing the delusive pleasures of Sensuality, iirhom
yon misnamed Philosophic, yont minds, are^incapacitated
for the enjoyment of my simple but permanent delists;
it only remains, in obedience to the dictates of immuta-
ble justice, that you should be punished for. your impious
writings, which have misled such numbers of your fel-
Ipw-creatures-^ — ^Advance,- O Truth ! ^ my futUful at-
tendant, and with thy resistless sword destroy these soul-
slajferSf and let their influence cease from l^is moment''

Tnuth instantly touched the throde of the new phi-
losophy with her. fiery sword, .and a wonderful meta-
morphosis took place throughout the Temple. Philoso-
phy fell from her throne, and was changed into a viper ;
the Mietaphysician vi^svtrans&nned into* a- mole r. the
Dramatist iikloa^ gi&at; and the other sages into monkeys

181

of- different . kiiids,* The female Philosopbeis were
changed into parrots, and tbe Pamphleteei^ Who' sur-
rounded me shrunk into the* fonn of toads*

My heart fainted wKh horror as^I gazed oh ffaes6 pro-
digies, and I every moment expected some dreadful
change would befal myself for. my temerity in visiting
this odious place.' Wliile I stood speechless' and trem-
bHng;Trutiitou<Aed the -floor with-her sword, and a
sudden concussion overturned the Temple fromitsToun-
clation« ^The throne vanished in a- thin- vapour;* the vi-
treous wall disappeared ; and beyond, where it had ex-
panded its deceptive medium,, instead of a' rich land-
scape, I beheld a blasted heath overgrown. with thorns
and thistles.

At this scene of desolation my fears increased ; I turned
towards Religion, and was going to prostrate myself be-
fore her, when Morality prevented me, and. putting the
Bible into my hand, whispered, *' Ypuare now safe; that
book will direct you to the Temple of Religion, which is
on the road to Salvation.'^ My spirits were revived, and
a new hope anuiiated my heart,' as I* clasped: the treasure
of Divine /Knowledge 'in my hands.' HeHjgbht turned
upon me her majestic eyes, beaming witk phil^tntliropy:
**^Keatnotj O Man!"said«hc, '*i*willeter betliyguat-

182

^ian vnhile thou porsuest the patli pointed out by R^ve-
latioD. Go^ feeble mortall feferm tby mantlets ; correct
thy passions by the vigilance and authority of Reason;
remember that Christianity is the true PhUotophy, and
that happiness consists Jn piety to die Creatoi^ and uai-
versal benevolenoe/*

While Religion was speaking, I felt unusual transport
auiioate iny heart; insomuch that I awoke and bebeld the
sun just rising. The- vision of the night enlightened, and
purified uoy soul, and incited me to that vuctivity in the
performance of the social^virtues, which, alone caaiender
thelifeof man valuable tolunself. and beneficial to his
fellow-creatures.

LITERATURE.

Literature is A liiM «»f4iitellectoal light, wlikk^like the
light of the sao, nay ■ sometimes enable as to see ivhat weilo
not like $ bat ^bo woolU wish to escape unpleai^Dg oijecU,
by coadentfiif^ihiawelf io^pei^peiiial^arkaess?

At the conmencement of the eighteenth txntury, Eag-
lisb literature, in addition to the sublimity of Milton,
.and the pathos of Shakespeare, received a more finished
polishy both in proKeaBd^vcrse, from Addison and Pope.

«<.

183

Tliat glorioBS and ever-to-be-adoiired cottstellation of
genitis uriiicb irradiated the reigns of Amie and George
tlie First, diffiised a lustre over our language, which
tine cannot diminish ! WhiH the dulcet strains «f Pope
are expressive of the very soul of harmony, the elegant
^daays of Addtson Ukiite the «pright]iness of wit with the
cUgnified^eieni^ of morally and religioc

Sterne was the first successful author of what has lieen
teimed sentimental writing. By a profound knowledge
of the passions, combined with an effervescence of genitn
seldom equalled, this smgular author overpowered the
'heart, and led. captive the fancy of his reader. His
** Tnstram Shandy'' and '* Sentimental Journey*' raised
^ number of imitators ; and since that period, all our
iiovels, and even our newspapers, have been tinctured
^ith sentiment.

But, alas! the eccentricities of genius, like the aber-
rations of a isomet, are often injurious to that system
which they might embellish. While the volumes of
Sterne abounded witli the energetic pathos which dis«
solved the heart of the reader, like the song of the Sy-
rens, they communicated the contagion of depravity, —
In his humourous delineations of character, he too often
degraded his wit bv an intermixture of licentiouspess ;

184

and while his philanthropy and sensibility rendered bi»
works a treasure to' the enthusiastic feeling heart, they
were prejudicial to that purity of mind which constitutes
the basis of true happiness.

Lord Chesterfield also contributed to the jaxity of
morals, especially among the great. > Jiis celebrated
*' Letters/' written in a familiar style, and abounding
with pertinent remarks which evinced the man of the
world, at once captivated and contaminated the heart.
Accustoined himself to revel in scenes of vblaptuous
pleasure, where all was artifice and delusion, he recom-
mended gallantry and suavity of maraiers in preference to
sincerity and manly integrity. The effects of his ivritii^s.
are thus energetically described by Cowper : —

^< Thou poUsh'd and high-fioishM foe to troth»
Grey-beard corraptor of oar list'oiog youth !
To purge and skin away the filth of vice.
That, so refin'd, it might the more entice.
Then pour it on the morals of thy son,
To taint his heart, was worthy of thine own!''

Hume's metaphysical essays were calculated to intro-
duce that scepticism which has since been too success-
fully pronuilged among us ; but their baneful efforts were

185

ably counteracted by a phalanx of moralbts, who arose
io succession to " vindieate tke ways of God to man/'

At the head of these elegant writers appeared Dr.
Johnson^ whose comprehensive intellect analised the
relative duties of mankind, and recommended, the prac-
tice of virtue with resistless eloquence. Sometimes, in-^
deed, melancholy begloomed his mind, like a cloud inter-
cepting the rays of the sun ; but on nrost subjects his'
intellectual radiations delight the reader, who is animated
and instructed by his sublime essays.

Dr. Hawkesworth and other moralists also studied to-
promote the improvement of public morals, but the la-
bours of those excellent men have been partly counter-
acted by several of our contemporaries of both sexes,
who have ingloriously prostituted their talents to vice.

Many of our modem female writers, both of poetry
and romance, havecontributed to the depravation of the
national taste, by their caricatures of" the passions. To
amuse is the object of these writers ; and they care not
how mu^h the heart of the reader is inflamed by volup-
tuous descriptions, if they can but amuse. When these,
liandniaids of licentiousness assume- a* more solemn tone>.
the demon of melancholy is conjured, up to terrify the

186

imagmatioii; the synapalby erf" tbe veaderb excited f&t
soBttoffieoder agaiast.theMciai viftues; and while the
unsaspicioos bo$om swells with a sigh of pity, the fatal
taint of dquavity- infects die heart imder the semblaiice
•of commiseration. The general peraieious tendency of
novek and romances is thus eneigetically satirised l^ a
juodempoet; —

** However dlsgais^d tb* inflammirtory tale.
And cover'd with a fioe-spon, specious veil,
Sttch wiiteri and such readers owe the ga^t
And rdisli of their j^ieasure all to lust.**

Doubtless many a Tiituons matron and Tirgm will he
surprised at this assertion, and blush to find (hat what
they had considered as a rational amusement, waa ia
reality a most dangerous engine of corrcption.

These lighler prddoctions^f genins^ kowewav v^ w/t
wholly engrossed by female writers. Men of distin-
guished talents liave added their names to the list-of flo*
velists. Refleetii^ that noveb might be oenverted into a
medium of philosophic iqseculatioiiy they have introduced
scepticism to thereader under the semblanoe of roinanoe.
Indeed, the geoeiaMf^ of our nofeb abound -either with
dangerous sopfajstiy, or girlish insignifieaace ; and, like
several of our modem dramas, are but too well calcu-
lated to vitiate the public taste.

187

AjDong tfae GonstellaHoii of «iir 'Contemporary \tii^
^eter Pindar* faas-loQg shove at^a slarof the^fiist mag-

« Tbe'^recpDt misfoftoae •£ tfcii agcAtMird ovght^o excite
-the comoiiierBUoaof hit a<lmiren, bat tlie lovert of jooulariiy
seldom sympathtie.with the wretch^. Tliose "Who iiave beftn
so often amused with hit humouroiufatires ms3Hl>e compared

to ohildrea, who» when their favourite toymssrcen bo longer
- sopiply th^ with some new ^batthle, hasten iajpursuit of no*

velty to some other sho|K

la his ioaaspicious rencontre the poor hard seems to have

^^ufTered an tttter extinction of hit inventive faculty; and, as a

' sM.iIi greater apfravation of hris misery, the very case which

had so often si^ported him was, in the handof >his opponent,

^ cbani^ed ioto-a magic wand, one strolLO of which extntited the

^ demon of licentious wit. This accident militates strongly

V against the supposed ferfeetibi^ of man.

It appears, indeed, that this exterior dnffer^d only a blight

^injury; but, alas! the sensorium of his delectable wit under-
went a dreadfiileoBcafisioa. This -ttraggle fifr the mastery

'lietween two satirists, indicates « rovival of anetent heroism.
Genius and valour have, indeed, often been combined ; though
some persons ridicule this coalescence, and maintain that men

-are always more ready to Tisit their lives in proportion to the

• -weakness of their understanding.

History can furnish many proofs ^bat the hero may alio Ise
sua accomplished scholar; and in modern times we have a re-
' markable instance in our literary colossus. Dr. Johnson, whose
■ puissance overthrew a blockhead.by a single blow of a folio !

Authors must henceforward be doubly armed, not only with
' << bar tremendous weapon a pointed gttote-^iU^ but witb a

• 188

nifude.'. His hmnotirons descriptions of licentiousness^
and his indirect sarcasms against .xeligion and morality,
have, perhaps, contributed more to the depravity of the
age,^tban all the coM speculations of the philosophic
fraternity. The nostrums of this poetical quack have
long Jbeen s^^^allowed as an antidote against the spleen,
that destroyer of imaginaiy happiness. The great £:ad
the gay wished for amusement;— an author who could
make them laugh was the man; — and the facetious Pe-
ter, by a combination of sarcasms against modesty and
piety, with personal satire, and by making his curious
verses tinkle prettily in rhyme, became the favourite
poet of the day. The fairest dames laughed with con-
vulsive glee, and beardless libertines treasured up his
Ode to Lais in their memory.

Tlie later eiRisions of this merry bard are compara-
tively duli; they do not contain so ^any oaths and im-
pious allusions as his former productions. Wonderful is
the ener^ communicated to dull verses by the inter-
spersion of exclamations. Had Peter (instead of the
name of Miss More) adorned his Nil Admirari with an
equal nu«iiber of vulgar execrations^ boys and fools

sword, or a cane; n&y, t bey mast puFsae their labours like
the apcient Jews, who, wli^n rebqildiog their city,, held a>
trowel ia^one band and^^wordin t^ie otber.^

189

^woold, as usual, Imve centiinied to praise his wit and
■liumour.

We are told that Waller employed the greatest part
"of* a summer in; composing and correcting ten verse^! —
' -Happy would, it be for the readers of the present day, did
our modem poets and prose-writers proceed with equal
circumspection. Novels would then be novel indeed;
and paper, which has been enhanced by the quantity
required for those voluminous productions, would be
purchasable at a moderate price, and might again be
used for the more valuable purpose of disseminating
knowledge.-

Mediocrity is tiuly said to be the distinguishing cha-
racter of our modem poetry, whicb in general is rather
pretty than beautiful, Thcu'e are few of those extrava-
gant but sublime flights of Milton or Shakespeare to be
< found in the favourite poetry of the day, which

" We cannot bl^me indeed, but i^^^emay sleep." "^

It is at once amusing and instructive to trace the rerd^

• lutions of the public taste since the.time of ''Addison. —

When he wrote, elegant literature became popular, and

•wonjy a few of the Aig^^ orders of society preferred-the

19a

sweet-sonndiiigf absurdities of the Italien opera to the
sublime diq>lay of bunaii paswms produced by the
tragic moacj or the genuiioe saltier of hjamour in^iied
by Thalia.

IJie national taste, like a vigorous coastitutiidn, con-
tuiui^d unimpaired till the poetical nostrums of the Delia
Cruscaempiriq?.* caused a temporary vitiation of taste. —
This attempt to introduce a Iklse refinement into mo-
dcEiipocitry, was corrected by the author of the.Baviad
and M^^viad, ,wiipse vi:ell-tu|ied satire operated like an
alterative*.

When the public taste had recovered from this tem-
porary deliriuin, the still more ridiculous story of Leo-
nora was translated from the German, and soon ob-
tained the palm ; being, ** In all the reabf^ of nonsense,
absolute/' It gleamed, like an ominous^ meteor of the
night,:for a.joioment, th^. vanbhed» andwas soon for-
gotten;.

But oven the absurd novels and romances translated
from other languages have been exceeded in impiety and
extravagance by "The Monk/' It has been obsened
thalt this>abofuinable.romance displays marks of genius.—

'^ Woe ta the oian whose wit disclaims its use,
SpariiUiag in vaih, or only to icduce.**

191

The hirpiliide of an immonl publicatidn m aggravated
in proportion to the taknts nuMipplied by the author;:
and few produptioos of an cftrvascent knagioation hare:
done more iiyui; than.this«.

If examined' by the eye of criticism, severar blemishes;
ivilt appear in this, celebrated wotk: — the style is ani^
mated, but the incidents are- improbable; and the high---
ivpought descriptions of human d^ravity are not natu-^.
ral — ^they are diabolical! The termination of the story.
is ridiculouSy puerile, and nonsensical; no school-boy.
could be- induced to beliereit : and the coltish genius of
the author has wantonly overleaped' the boundaries of
common senses taste, and virtue I The poetical tale of
*' Alonzo and Imogene" seems to have been written pur-
posely to cherish: that depravity of taste which delights
' In marvellous and chimerical romance. As a poem, it
hasmany beauties;- though that tripping measure, with
■ tlie accent on every third syllable^, seems ill adapted to
the subject. This poem is a very proper companion for
Brager's Loonora^ and Southey'^ Old Woman riding post
with the Devil. Indeed, they fdrm a trio unequalled
h^ any writer, ancient or modern..

Lican1ibH»novelsi^ romances, and'poeras, may be com-
pared ta» poisonous plants, which are cherished by the

192

^ame sun which ripeiis putritious graih ; and those iudiTi'
duals who are capable of writiiig should'pause^ and re*
^ect with the poet when speaking of the pen—

•* The sacred implement I now employ
^ay prove a mUc^efy or at best SLt9y.i
A trifle if it move but to amutey
But if to wrong the jadgmenf, or abuse,,
lYorse than a poniard ia the basest hand.
It stabt at once the morah oja land V*

We can boast of living authors whose works will de-
light and instruct posterity. Far be it from the candid
satirist to cherish for a' moment that unfounded pre-
judice, which would exalt the merit of our ancestors by
the depreciation of contemporary genius; at the same
time it must be acknowledged with regret, that our most
estimable are not always our most'popular writers* —
Those authors who stoop to amuse the giddy throng at
the expence of their principles, are too often suftessfal;
but sterling merit will survive such temporary produc-
tions, as the ever-green flourishes in perennial beauty
amid the decays of surrounding vegetation.

Let not a passion for fame tempt the man of genins
from the path of rectitude into the wild region^ of Keen-"
tious fancy. The task of an author is the most impor-

193

tant that can be imagined ; — it is lib daty to ameliorate
tbe morals of society : but errors disseminated by his
se<fuctive eloquence, may deprave thousands of intelli-^
gent beings! — Let him reflect, that his most secret studies
are open to the eye of an omnipresent Creator, to whom
he must be accountable for the use he makes of his
. talents. Under tfab impression he will consecrate the
energies of his mind to Virtue, convinced that " It is al-
ways a writer's duty to make the world better, and justice
is a virtue independent on time and place."

REVIEWERS.

He that refines tbe public taste is a public benefactor

JOHMSOZr.

Monthly Review.

The most valuable work of periodical criticism which
this, or any other, nation has produced, is the Monthly
Review, wiiich is evidently conducted on the most inde-
pendent principles. As moralists, the reviewers merit the
esteem of good men ; for though in a moment of vivacity
they may sanction the general laugh raised by the hu-
mourous description of Peter Pindar, yet they are neitheir
the abettors of licentiousness, bigotry, nor infidelity*

194

. From their decbioDS^ sanctioned by tastb, it will be
dangerous to appeal, as is sometimes done, to the judg-
ment of a people wbom they hsive so long amused and
instructed.

Critical Review*

As astrenuous and successful defender of moralify and
taste, the Critical Review is respectable and elegant. The
strictures of its conductors are indeed of a graver cast
than those of the Monthly Review, which it seems, how-
ever, to cancel in abstracted and metaphysical disquisitloD.
They have both been so long the coadjutors of science,
that we feel a similar veneration for their decisions which
a pupil does for those of his preceptor.

For nearly half a century this valuable review has given
criticisms on new publications, as they appeared in suc-
cession ; and although its pages have been accused of-
.partiality to certain booksellers, yet the general tenonr of
its critieisms will endure the scrutinising eye of the inves-
tigator.^ — Alarmed by the animadversions of this review
'On the works of others, many a young, author has paused
in his progress^ towards absurdity : and by turning into
the path of propriety, smopthed by criticism, he eventu-
ally iarrived fit the temple of JF^me, which would have
b6en inaccessible by apy other road.

195

BritUk Critic.

This publication has contributed to the rectification of
youthful judgment when employed in classical pursuits.
It is to be regretted, indeed, that its pages have some-
times been subservient to prejudice. Impartialit^r in a
review is, like generosity in an individual, the most ex-
alted virtue ; but ' though this review has in some in-
stances decided with too much severity agaiast writers of
opposite political and religious opinions, it has been a
formidable opponent to infidelity — a most eloquent and
puissant defender of Christianity^ In this light, the
British Critic is entitled to the veneration of pious men,
^fao, while they approve and admire the acuteness with
which sophistry is analised and confuted 'in its pages,.
*will readily overlook-its imperfections.

Ahtifacohin Revieio.

«...

This formidable adversary toinnovatoTS and theorists
of every description which militates against the. present
establishment in church and state, excites a mixture of
esteem and disappfob&tion* in inosi unprejudiced read-
ers. Theticrirtibny, nay, thie scurrility, with which it
satii^lses debiocriaticar WriteYs, is vinil^tin the extreme ;
and more frequently raises disgust, than enforces con-

196

viction. Like Japiter Tonans,. tlie reviewer hurls tus-
thunderbolts at the head of oppositioiu

It would be absurd to expect jpapwi'tMfcl criticisiir from
a publication apparently deyoted to a party. Even its
veiy denomination bears evidence of its end amd tum^ —
Its pages abound ^ith energetic and elaborate investiga-
tions of political wm1e8» and when dbposed to bestoK
approbation, the cntic can. do it with a good grace-

The Antyacobin Review has encountered immoralltj
and impiety with considerable success in its honourable
warfare against vice: it deserves the good wishes and tLe
aid of every virtuous luind; and where politics are not
iuentioned>» perhaps no periodical work is better adapted
to the improvement of youth,, in the principles of sound
morality. lEver vigilant, and jealous of innovation, its-
editor, like the augel with the fiery sword, guards that
Tree of U/e, the doctrine of Divine Revelation,, and
discomfits its enemies*

This ^' literary censor^ has successfully opposed the
itffo^ds of tlie new phUosopk]/ ; and though he hasscmier
times attacked the Monthly Reviewers in a very ilhberal
manner, yet there is a coincidence in their reprobation
of Geraum 4rania« and French infidelity.

197

And now, most awful censors, as the author has
irankly published his opinion of your merit, he entr^ts
you to cenmrr or pram his work so as to make au im-
pression on your readers* Do not, O venerable arbiteta
ofourtastel

« Damn with faipt praise/*

No, rather condescend to call this volume funueiMl*

cat, stupid, illiberal, or any other epithet of blame hi

your critical vocdMary. On your decision, '* most

potent, grave, and reverend sagniors,** depends its

success. Look down with complacency from your sub*

lime situatioiii where, like the fabled gods on Olympus,

you sit enthroned amid the thunder-clouds of science*

- and behold the struggles of an Observer in4his bustling

$cene below ; analyse his publication- with the generosity

of Britons, and do not assassinate his happiness with

that empoisoned stilettQ of literature-^ pen dipped it

the tincture of gall.

^ s

198

. N5,WSE!APERS.

— To hold as 'twere the mirror up to Katnre ; to shew
Virtae her owfa feature ; Scorb, her owit4iBage.; and the very
ng^e atid body of the Timey his form ao0 pressure.

S,HAKSPf:ARE.

. Amoog the numerous advantages besto^yed on civilised
natioas by tUb art of printing, newspapers have long formed
iin. excellent niedium of universal inteUjgei^ce. Before
the establishment of ..these pap^ mercuries^ the gene-
rality jof mankind continue^ in.a. state of ignorance res-
pecting each other, au4 the glob^ \vhiiph tl^iey inhabited,
excepting the vague knowledge communicated by the
i^nperfect accounts of travellers. .,

^ . ■ . • •- «■ ■ . . * •

, . 2iay be able to form some idea of the indis-*

. • lity of newspapers, let us only consider the

iclr circulation ; their useful cbriimuhications

oiumerce, politics, new discoveries in the

' nces, improvements yn agriculture, and ad-

of new publications. In this point of view,

said to convey information conducive to the

F the social bodv, as the blood circulates

mimal for the invigoration of its members.

Advertisements on different subjects not only amuse
but instruct the reader : but in this respect, it must be

199

^cknoiivledgecly that many of our public prints disseminate
pernicious intelligence. Fatse attestations in favour' of
nostrums often disgrace their columns ; and the modesty"
of the reader is sometimes offended by meeting ad ver-
tisements'by which assignations and intrigues are carried
on under fictitious names. This is the more reprehen-
sible^ as we often in the next column find a spirited and
well-timed satire on some recent immoral titnsaction.

Thus^. like. every other human institution^ our public
prints are tin(:tured with imperfec^tion, though of general
utility ; as the same fertile sqil^ is at once productive of
nutritious grain and poisonous plants. Till the legisla-
ture shall deem it proper to suppress quackery, the edi-
tors of our journals will accept money froqi empirics fof
the publication of their advertisements.

Our newspapers exhibit a lively and intei^sting view
of the busy and the gay world-; nor are the ridiculous
freaks of fashion overlboked by news-writers. The foi-
bles of the vain and the great are c6mmonly too light t6
be corrected by serious admonitions from the pulpit^ and
too evanescent to allow the satirist time to attack them
in a volume ; but our ephemeral ^ensprs^ like eagledL-toi
the wing, instantly perceive and pursue their quarry^
which is seldom able to elude or survive trieu* grasp, A

200

newspaper is indeed a tremendous inqubitorial insfarnment,
and the most abandoned character in high life woM
tremble at the idea of being publicly exposed through its
magnifying medium. By them we obtain general ideas
of the state of the civilised world ; affecting ineidenfs
which exhibit new views of human nature ; and tbe per-
petual vicissitudes of the nations of the earth.

Newspapers are confessedly the best vehicles of poli-
tical information, and as suc^ will ever be highly prized
in all free countries. Their suppression might therefore
be considered as a preliminary step towards despotism ;
for it b a well-authentSeated fact* that among those un-
hapi^ nations subjugated by tyranny, newspapers are
either nnknown* or those in circulation are under the in-
fluence of the crown.

•

In free countries, the case is happily different. Here
newspapers become important and of genend ntifity.
The report of the day may sometimes be artfully raised
by stock-jobbers^ and <ven the defamation of individuals
may defile the-press ; but such rumours and slanders are
soon superseded by the authoritative investigadoo of
truth.

Whoever suspects that newqxipers are not the best re-
jgistenof &cts relative to the progress of civiUzatioo,

201

arls^ and sciences, would do well to enqnire whence the
materials of our annals are supplied, which furnish the
liistorian with a regular series of interestings facts ar-
ranged in chronological order ?--— certainly from news-
papers. Thus a combination of materials collected
from the quarry, the mine, and the forest, in the hands
of a skilful architect, is reared into a magnificent temple
Ibat will endure for ages.

PUBLIC AMUSEMENTS.

Dare to Itave eense yovnelres ; assert the stage,
Be JBStly warmM with yoar own native tage :
Sach plays alone should win a British far.
As Cato's self had not dtsdain'd to hear.

Pope.

Public amusements, especially those of the D»nia»
nre peculiarly calculated to give us an insight into the
manners and taste of a nation ; as comedies are oflea
satires on existing follies, and from the tenour of popular
tragedies we may trace the refinement of the passions.
Even farees and pantomimes are not to be overlooked, as
they generally exhibit caricatures of the fashionable fin-
volities^f tbeday.

20i

Theatric exhibitioDS present so many gratificafioos to
the mind^ thattbey will ever befaTOurited with a perished
people. The eye is delighled with a variety of gracrefol
forms decora.ted in characteristic dresses^ and displayii^
the afiecting gestures of passion^ or the more pleasing
agility and grace of motion in the sprightly dance ; t^e
ear isjcbarmed with the- harmony of vocal and instrumen-
tal mnsic : the magic influence of sympathy pervades the
mind in unjson with the dignified woe of the tragic muae,
or the animating sallies of Thalia provoke irresistibJe
mirth. To these charms may be superadded the inte-
resting variety of graceful forms and animated counte-
nances of the audience, while appropriate scenery and the
splendour of taper-light give the whole an air of gaiety
and pleasure.

With all thes^ attractions, however, it is questionable
wliether the stage has not contributed to immorality.
Under proper regulations it would, as the poet has de-
Sbiribied it, be a powerful monitor —

" To wake the soul by tender strokes of art.
To mend the genius, and inform the heart;
•To make mankind in conscious virtue bold.
Live o'er each scene, and be what thi;^; behold. '^

<f^i Li

$»3

Bat a candid enquiry inJH conmce us that onr most

pqpidar plays have a peniicious effisct on the miod»

Shak9p^ce's best tra^edieSy Othelloi, Ha^et, and Richjicd

theTinrdy containsevendind^ent passives and allusipn^

at once yumle and obscene. Tfaos^ xUpt^tes c^ lewd wit

were written to gratify the in&ntta^te of the SogUst^

nation ; bi^tno«r> wl^ it has c^fes^fi^ty attained nialii*

rity, let us reject such passages which have a much greater

aflin^ty to dulwtts, than th^ iddizers of the Avonian bard

would admit

The recent introduction of the Germs^n drama may b^ ^
considered as a phei^menon in the world of dissipa(lifai>
That the good sense of the English nation shpuld tamely
submit to this revoliition of taste, is altogeth^ ]|ie¥(iir.
cable.

When the 'Stranger was introduced^ to the public^
many of our fair dames welcomed hua to this hospitable
metropolis. Their sympathy for the piKiir adultress, so
ably defended by Kotzebue, was a striking proof of their
sensibility \^-** A Yellow-feeling makes' one woudrdus
kind y aiid from the recent instances of crim. ^on. it
may be conjectured, that the system of our male and fe^'
^lale m£90g'izimsf« is daily obtaining new proselytes I

1
i

204

As K6tTOt>tie eloqaeotly pleaded the ranse ot the^adul*
tress in T%e Stranger, so in his Natural Son (or as it has
%een styled by an English play^^wright^ his Lovers^ Vows)
lie has place<l a kind nnwedded fiiir-one in an equally
afiecting and amiable point of view. The IVoMa JLk,
written by the same dramatiBty is another proof of the
fdicity of hb invention in the extenuation of guilt.

It has been asserted* and with truth* that though our
modem comedies are inferior in humour to those of Con-
greve and Farquhar* they are more chaste and delicate
hi sentiment The obscene allusion* the impioo» witti-
cism* and indecent gesture* are gradually vanishing from
the English stage ; yet enough remains to deserve the
animadversions of the moralist. Indeed* with all our
boasted refinement* the morality of our theatres seems to
consist in varnishing the haggard face of vice with cos-
metics; Their purity, like the cleanliness of our fashion-
able belles* is not the removal of dirt* but the puttiiig it
' artfully on as a beaotifier !

Some dramatic writers complain of the neglect of ma-
nagers ; but if we may judge from those rejected pieces
which Imve been published by the xiuthors* tliere is little
reasoo to regret the fastidiousness of theatrical cridckm*
as probably most of the plays which have beea i)^faa^

205

unworthy of pepreseDtation. Let it be remembered
, that some of the managers are men of acknowledged •
nius ; and it is but reasonable that they should give
tJfcieir o^n productions the preference.

With res]^ct to the actors and actresses of the princt^
pal theatres, several of them possess considerable talents,
l3ut one general defect is, their apparent consciousness c€
^lerforming in the presence of an audience. This gives
them an affected air in different characters and situations,
'wlule k destroys that pleasing illusion which onght to
predominate in the mind of the spectator. — ^Another de-
fect is, the profusion of paint which they use. In their
dress too, the actresses are censurable for a liberal dis*
play of person, which occupies too much of the specta-
tor's imagination. Modem pantomimes are reprehensi-
ble in several respects ; for though the frolics of Harle^
quin and Columbine display a most pleasing variety of
motion, the appearance of giants, bears, pump^ emitting
ilauie, 6c c. are ridiculous and puerile. ...

An absurdity in the audience, especially those ia the
galleries, is the requinng a Song to be repeated, of which,
from the distance, they cannot understand a single syl-
lable. . All that an actress has to do on this occasion, is.
to 9^e fonvai'd, and articulate a variety of niusical

«06

teifid% tcoompanied whh a smHe, und a gracefol atd-
tude. She may save henelf the trottble of express*
one word. Were a lavoante noger to make the expeii-
ment, she would. not only ref^eive plaudits, but hear the
exhilaratiiig encore resounded from the celestial regions';
and on a repetition of the Ume, she might rely on beings
dismissed with the loudest plaudits of those excdlent
critics !

Having paid our respects to the two principal theatres,
the next in gradation b the summer theatre, which is cer-
tainly conducted with considerable ability and address.
To enumerate the defects, or expatiate on the merits of
the pieces represented thore, would be almost a repeti-
tion of what has already been said, excepting that it is
more peculiarly devoted to Thalia, and of course light
and airy productions are generally represented. In
many instances during the last season, wit and humour
: were .happily combined for. the amusement of the town ;
but some of the aftertpicpes were deficient in every
respect.

Whatever be the present defecte of our theat;res, still
they furnish the most. rational. and elegant of all amuse-
ments to the public ; a^d. though they may have a ten-
detiejia^emmise, they at the same time humanixe the

sor

Iskeart. The afoolhioii of theatric exhtbitioiis woald ren*
d^f nieiiiiiore unsociid* illiberal, and mde. To use the
words of an elegant author, ** If men of wit who write
iVnr the stage would turn their thoughts upon exciting
^uch good natural impulses as are in the audience, but
are choaked up by vice and luxury, they would not only
please, but befriend us at the same time/' Hence it is
evident, that the representation of immoral dmmas must
lie injurious to public happiness, while the display of
Virtue in her native loveliness would engage the admira-
tion, and purify the heart of the spectator..

Italian Opera,

.Almost every rank of society participates the atmise-
ments of the theatres and public gardens ; but the Ita-
lian Opera is almost exclusively appropriated to the no-
bility. It would be a happy circumstance indeed for the
rest of the community, did persons of quality engross aA
other frivolous and expensive amusements, such as routs,
niasquerades, and private theatricals, which, by a most
absurd passion for imitation, several of oiir merchants
and tradesmen's wives and children have pursued with
frantic eagerness.

The sum of two hundred guineas, or upwards^ is annu-
ally subscribed by several of the nobiKty for abtios-at the

208

Opera-house, where, together with their wives and dau^
ters, tbey are eoDtented to assemble twice "k week to est-
joy sweet $ound$ ; — sense is out of the questioo. The
affectation of a knowledge of Italian assumed by tliis re-
fined audience; the exstacy to which they are aj^pa-
rently raised by dulcet airs ; and the pleasure tbey seem
to feel at the convolutions and contortions of the dancers,
are childish and ridiculous.

From the ardour with which some of our titled conn-
trymen patronise this exotic species of amusement^ we
might imagine that their mansions were infested by the
tarantula, and that they were obliged to resort to music
as a remedy for its bite. But the truth is, mucb more
dangerous diseases invade their repose: — remorse for
time and treasure mi:»pent ; splenetic vapours generated
by luxury ; and the imbecility of indolence, require the
temporary anodyne of music. ^

The patronage which tjiis frivolous amusement has re-
ceived in this country during the last century, aftbrds a
sufiicient proof, that obstinacy, combined with weakly
is sometimes invmcible. Satirists have in vain ridiculed
this preposterous waste of time and money ; for, hke
other hereditary diseases of some of tfie great, a depraved
taste seems to have descended from sire to son.

209

Masquerades*
The lieart distrnstin; asks }f this be jey.

A masquerade may be denominated the principal fes-
tival of licentioHsness. There Pleasure presides; —
*** That reeling goddess with a zoneless waist f — ^and
leading the young, the gay» and the dissolute, into her
fsLYomtfi recesses, she bids them revel in delights, una-
abashed by the scrutinbing eye of Decency, who is ex-
cluded from a participation of those inahanting orgies^

S!f

AFPEjrmx.

God and Nature link'd the general frame,
Ami ^m^H^fJhw aed soeitrf%e4lie mum.

POEB.

t^ROM tbe foregoing sketch of tbe present state of
London, it must t>e evident, that there are defects in its
police, which nothing less than legislative wisdom and
anthoritj eaa rectify. Out moral bodty requires an dl*
terstwe mther than a ^err^twe ^~-au tdtidpte agHindt
tile poison of vice, ia^ad ^an €^piat€ to inciieas^^ ile le*
tliaigy. Hnmaiiitj tolreais the pi«v€lltio» of dfittiieef,
^hieh^ if ei^lmiltedj jtisUee rndsftpiiniab^ tted ^a^mniy
mnst- not spare.

HoW ofifen^do it^ 9t^i 'ill Inaomebt^ wheil ^nrtrntimd
beneficence i^redemiDates^ f4t\ a ferv^t desire to coatri^
bttte W Ihe eomlofft'of tkeMniSeraMe, and a {riiikmUbro-
l>i€ afdoar te • prooMMe the iiniTet^l ht^pfriaess <aff man*
kind ! — ^A generous and sympathising wish thul tii^f^
was no misery in the world I How naturally do we par*

'ilff^dte th^ j(55^s^d' the ddf ferns 6f fhd^ ^oud^ us,
'Tim Mt&Xqmt^ s5t«^% hiipkhted in'^sln, by ihe

313

Divine Being! Let us cheriflh those geiieroiis»tiiose god-
like propensidesy by obedience to the dictates of benevo'
lence ; by the alleviation of honuin misery; and ibe
steady practice of that jnstioe and charity, whidi wHl in
the end exalt our ** $eIf4ove to wdal, to divme/'

Under these impressions, the antiior b^ kave to pie-
sent the following hints to the reader's consideration ;
and if they should, even in the smallest degree, contri-
bute to the amelioration of society, he shall think that he
has not lived, or written, in vain.

1. The punishment of seduction.^— At present this yio-
lation of social happiness is rather promoted than pre-
vented : for as- the only penalty is pecuniary, some de-
praved beings have been tempted to connive at the dis-
honour of thekriemale.relatives, from the desire to profit
by it !— Hence the necessity of a more severe law; sup-
pose the infliction of the pillory, and solitary imprison-
ment for a limited time. This would imdoubtedly dieter
mahy^a brutal debauchee from a pursuit the most perni-
cious to the population, health, and morals, of the peo-
ple ; for seduction is generally the precursor of pros-
titution.

■ '• " ' ■

2. As a preventiye of female misery, a public buUding

migbt be appropriated for the receptioo of ma^d-servaots

813

out- of place, where they might be supplied with needle^
work, the manufacture of &as, ^oves, artificial flowers^
&c. which might be disposed of to shopkeepers. This
institution would contribute to the wel&re of many a
beautiful and virtuous young woman.

3. The institution of several asylums for prostitutes*
It is a well-known and melancholy fact, that the present
limited receptacles for those unhappy beings are inade-
qiaate. Without exaggeration, we may venture to esti-
mate the number of prostitutes in this capital at teir
thousand ; and their disconsolate and friendless state
renders them particularly worthy of commisseration.
The feeling heart shudders with sympathy, and a mourn-
ful sensation, nearly allied to despondency,, fills the bo-
som of the passenger, who nightly beholds* those poor
victims of seduction stand shivering, and exposed to the
inclemency of the wintry atmosphere. Sometimes, where
a group of them stand together, vociferating obscene
expressions, responding hysteric fits of laughter, or as-
suming an air of gaiety, and humming songs which once
amused their days of innocence, the querulous voice of
woe is heard amid their feeble affectation of jollity, and
the starting tears of anguish roll down those cheeks whicli
once bloomed with health, but are now holkxw with dis-
ease, and florid with the tints of art. Were those poor.

^t4

yet 6'ecoMe as ibey Mfere Ulteiided by the d^v^^ir of aB
^ood— fte €ftiaav«aitidt the conuhuktf ty. Let fli6 ^.
iyairot)ist 6h^ f«fie<^t ob' itk jliatiomii advantage ^IM,
might be derived fr6m die restbratii^ii of so gttao, a HftlU^
ber of our fellow-creatures to the paths of virtae ! Let
iStii consider iht abce^on of haljp^mess and increase of
po|>iilatl64 Hi coosequeiice of ten thousand yomig \rxf-
tb^nh^vg reclaunM from vice, happily married, add
tlierSshzD^ a fiumerom antf heathhy offispring. Does rtHi
tiie huma^ Bosom swcfll and palpitate with an eameift
wisl to facilitate this grand and importeirt natfcuM
(renefitl

4. A hckge of indttstt^ far cOf^iSts, HkstisAd of hdfiiA-
tkertt,-—i^he atHity of such an ins^utM is too 66viotts
'tb're<j[aife any iilustration.

t\ 'the ioiA sti^ptessiOQ of ^a^nbrqi^ers, HbA Ufe
'a&oAtion of ^^tate-lotteries.

G; Lhhitaiim of taverns dnd idchouses. — ^it sippedh
ffiit ijfaere are ap\tardsr of^W thousand alebonses in this
capM; zod that mrthy of tfa^m are kept by immoM e%M-
igitikr^. On the other hand, several worthy xaen obtailb
•a coWOTtaliie livelihcrbd, 6y vefrdidg beer^ ?ile, &c.4di

jGDmiiiiiDity*

those dens of immoTaiity» horn whid^^ jl^i^^ pCPffipy
of death and sid, they issue to infest the conuniinityy till
the ann of the law arrests their dire career. In order to
lender such a measure truly and permanently efficacious,
it would be necessary to take up all the beggars, and con-
vey them jfrom their present wretched hovels to recepta-
cies where they might end dvBjr ,da^s jtn j[h»o^. Their
children might be taken under the protection of govern-
ment and educated so as to qualify them for an indus-
trious progress throiquh life. By such regulations, delin-
quencies would gradually diminish ; a sufficient degrae
of knowledge would enable those miserable children who

216

are now initiated in the mysteries of frand, to appreciate
the only true source of contentment and health — ^tfae
pursuit of some handicraft art-— which would enable them
to realise an honest livelihood* For, however question-
able it may appear to such misanthropic philosophers as
Mandeville, man is naturally an active, intelligent, and '
virtuous beiofg ; to suppose the reverse is an mdirect
imputation of imperfection in the omniscttnt Creator,
who undoubtedly made all things very good! At the
same time it must be acknowledged, that the influence of
evil example is but too powerful over the untaught mind.
Happiness is the natural wish of the human heart ; but
while the vicious pursue it in self-gratification, the virtu-
ous find it in the regulation of the passions, and the prae-
tice of beneficence.

J. Agg, Printer^ Bristol.

Str>^ •

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