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of  the 

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cL'forCf   JJuntah.  at  if,  black  J\.ap07ivi-r 
LS          -n    7.  -r  •  ''    w* 

JV  u  Itrcy 


THE 

DEVILS  PAT&IARCK, 

OR 

A  Full  and  Impartial  Account 
Of  the 

NOTORIOUS  LIFE 

Of  this  Prefent 


of 


INNOCENT  the  nth. 


Wherein  Is    nnvly  Difcovered  his  Rife  and 

.    Rtign  i  The  Time  and  Manner  of  Kis  being  chofen 

.Pope  i  His  Prime  Procclfion  ,  Confecration  and 

Coronation  i  The  Splendour  and  Grandeur  o^his 

Court  ;  His  moit  Eminent  and  Gainful  Cheats,  by 

which  he  Gulls  the  filly  People  i  His  Secret  and 

Of  en  Ttv.nfaiitions  with  the  Papifts  in  En%liind,Scot- 

hnd,   Francs  and  IrcLmd,    and  other    Proteflant 

Count!  evs  to  .this  very  day  ;    Together  with  the 

'.  jfyft  of  the  Hellilh  Policies  and  Infamous  Ad:ions 

or  -his  wicked  Life. 


Written  by  an  Eminent  Pen  to  Revive  the  Remem 
brance  of  the  alnicft  forgotten  Plot  againft  the  Life 
of  hisi'acred  Majeity  and  the  Proteltant  Religion. 


ro 


LONDON,  Printed  for  John  Dimton  at 
Raven  in  the  Poultry.  _i683- 


THE 

PREFACE 

T  O    T  H  E 

READ  E  R. 

Candid  and  Gurteous  Reader, 

WHen  a  fttddain  and  furpriz>ing  In- 
vafion    is    made    upon  us  by  ft 
Foreign  Power  ,     every  Right- 
thinking  Mind  cannot   hut  Judg 
it  high  time  to   Fife  our  Beacons.     jEfbps 
Witty  Wifdom,    (  in  his  Fable  of  the  Shep 
herd-Boy,  that  crfd  out  falfly,    AS  well  as 
frequently  ,    £  The  Wolf  comes  ,   the  WoJf 
comes,  Help,  Help.  ]    to  the  People,  )  hath 
in  the  Apologues  Moral  a  'very  Jhrewd  Con- 
gruity,  with  our  prefevt  Cafe,    thcugb  there 
-wants  not  alfofome  Difparity. 

( I.)  The  Congrtlity  conjijh  i#  thefi  parti 
culars, 

Firlt,  Every  Shepherd  Jhcttld  he  careful  to 
preserve  the  Flock  committed  to  kis  Charge  ; 
Jo  otught  every  Myftical,  as  well  asyhe  Lite 
ral  Shepherd,  (  whether  itofvlos  ailt  'EWI?X<* 
w  '&•,  Toung  or  Old,  )  to  he. 

B  Secondly, 


The  Preface 

Secondly,  Both  ought  to  cry  out  of  Proba 
ble  And  Approaching  Dangers.  It  was  not 
at  all  Improbable,  that  the  Wolf  was  a  coming, 
becaufe  he  us"*d  frequently  to  do  fo. 

Thirdly,  When  Dangers  he  both  Probable 
and  Approaching,  (/er,  Var  the  Nature  of  the 
Beaft  to  worry  the  Sheep,  )  then  "'tis  the  Du- 
y  of  Both,  not  only  to  Cry  out,  but  to  Crave 
Help  from  the  Peoples  Hands,  yea  to  quicken 
up  their  Ajjifttmce  with  ftrcng  and  Reiterated 
Outcry  s,  That  the  Abaddon,  (  a  bad  cm  in- 
dee  d,  )  the  Apollyon,  cr  Devouring  Beaft,  is 
juft  a  coming, 

Fourthly,  All  Hands  are  few  enough  to 
Help  the  Lord  againft  this  Mighty,  (  yea,  in 
the  Romifh  phraje,  Almighty,  )  Beaft.' 

Fifthly,  All  private  Works  muft  be  left, 
(  both  in  City  and  Countrey,  )  for  flopping 
the  ftrong  Current  of  a  Publick  and  (Common 
.  Calamity. 

Sixthly,  As  the  Sheep  of  JEibps  Shepherd 
were  Gracing,  [_  in  eminentiori  Loco,  J  up- 
cn  Lofty  Mountains ,  yet  not  Inaccefiible  to 
the  Wolf:  So  the  Sheep,  which  Gofpel-Shep- 
herds  are  feeding  ,  and  which  the  Romifh 
Wclf  would  Worry,  are  likewise  Gracing  up- 
tn  the  Holy-Hill  of  2ion,  the  higheft  of  all 
Hills  ,  .yet  not  fo  high  ,  but  ,  when  the  Sins 
•vf  the  Sheep  do  open  a  pajjage,  becomes  Accei- 
iible/0  the  Wolf  alfo.  Where  the  PC  aft  hath 

been 


to  the  Reader. 

been  before,  Treading  down  the  Green  Pa~ 
fturcs^  and  fouling  the  Reiidue  with  his 
foul  Feet,  he  hath  fome  hope  for  returning  tbi- 
tber  again y  elpecially,  feeing  the  Neft-Egg  of 
Romilrr  Reliques  ts  ftill  left  behind  to  encou 
rage  bis  Return  :  Bloody  Bifoop  Bonner  could 
once  Briskly  Brag,  Such  as  like  to  Sup  our 
Broth,  we  will  make  them  love  to  Eat  our 
Beef  too  :  God  grant  us  a  good  Deliverance 
frcm  fucb  Barbarous  Butchers  ,  and  Beaftly 
Butcheries,  from  that  Brutifh  People,  Skilful 
to  Deftroy. 

(2.)  As  t o  the  Disparity, 
Firir,  The.  Outcry  of  /Efops  Shepherd-Roy 
was  only,  [  Joci  gratia,  ~]    a  falfe  Holloe  for 
Sport-fake,    a  Bojijh-Trick,    playing  the  Wag 
with  the  Mafters  of  the  Sheep,   to  wbom  he 
was  but  an  Hireling-Servant :  Bmt  the  Outcry 
of  our  Shepherds   have  been  ever  more   Real 
and  Serious,  front  the  many   JLflays  and  At- 
tewpts,  which  Rome  has  really  made  to  Re 
duce  (  as  Colemans  Phrafe  isy  )   this  Nor 
thern  Htrefie  to  her  Obedience  :    She  hath  all 
along,  ever  fince  the  Reformation  of  Religi 
on  here,  with  all  her  Fraud  and  Force,  with 
all  Her  Craft  and  Cruelty  endeavoured  to  re* 
enter  with  her  Deformation  of  it,  and  to  Re 
cover  both  her  Neft,    and  her  Nelr-Egg,  from 
whish  foe  was  forced. 

B  2  Second- 


Thfi-Preface 

Secondly,  Our  Outcry  hath  not  been  made 
ly  Come  ens  Novice,  or  of  many  Kovices  on 
ly  t  but  alfo  of  the  moft  Grave,  nioft  "judici 
ous,  and  moft  Thinking  Discerning  Fathers  of 
the  Sheepfold,  who,  with  Moles,  csuld  efpye 
the  'Very  firft  Outgoings  of  Wrath,  and,  with 
Elijah  could  Obferve  a  Black  Cloud,  though  no 
bigger  than  a  Mam  Hand  :  All  thefe  at  Sun 
dry  Times  ,  and  in  Divers  Manners,  have 
ciJc.i'  as  with  one  Mouth  Sounded  Loud 


Thirdly,  Ttoough  thofe  called  in  to  he  Afji- 
ftants  againft  the  Wolf,  in  the  Fable,  [  nihil 
elfe  comperiebant,  ^  found  nothing  of  real 
Danger.  Tet  thofe  cattd  together  to  Ajfift  a- 
gainft  the  Wolf  of  Romes  Incurfions,  have 
upon  undenyalile  ground-s  found  out  a  Real  Dan-  ' 
ger,  Witnefs  Hx  Majefty  and  Privy-Conn-' 
cils  Reiterated  Proclamations  ,  the  Unani 
mous  Votes  of  Four  Succeffive  Parliaments, 
(  all  caWd  upon  for  their  Affiftants^  &c.  )  The 
Forms  of  Prayer,  Compoled  and  Impofed 
by  the  Bifhops,  for  the  Fa(l  appointed  by  Au 
thority,  upon  the  Account  of  the  Popifh  Plot, 
as  alfo  the  Murdtr  of  Juftice  Godfrey,  and  . 
the  Juft  Execution  of  fome  Grand  Confpira- 
tors. 

Fourthly,  The  Sheep-worrying  Beaft  in  the 
Fable,  is  exprejly  called  a  Wolf  only  ,   though 
be   other  Beajts  as  obnoxious  to   Sheep. 


to  the  Reader. 

But  this  Molock  of  Rome  is  fucb  a  BlouJy 
Beaft-j  as  no  Name  could  fufficiently  exprefs  bis 
Bloud-Thirjtinefs.  Hereupon  (i.)  Daniel 
calls  the  Fir  It  Beaft,  (  or  Allyrian  Empire,) 
a  Lyon.  The  Second,  (  the  Medo-Perilan,) 
a  Bear.  The  Third,  ( the  Grecian,)  a  Leo 
pard.  But  the  Fourth,  to  wit,  (  the  Ro 
man  Empire, )  he  calls  a  Beaft  in  general, 
(  without  any  name, )  as  if  Exceeding,  (  as 
well  as  Including,  )  the  Savage  Nature  of  all 
the  Three  former ,  Dan.  7.4,  f,  6,  7,  23. 
(2. )  John  alfo,  (  *j  W/  *M  Daniel,  )  calls 
him  a,  Beaft  in  the  general ',  (  without,  becaufe 
above  any  Name, )  jet  makes  he  him  a  Mon- 

ftrous  Btqft  ,  Compotmde4  of  all  the  Three 
Beafrs  aforefaid ,  as  bat'ing  the  Feet  of  a 
Bear,  rhe  Mouth  of  a  Lyon,  Himfelf  like 

~a  Leopard,  and  the  Dragon  giving  him 
Power,  Revel.  13.  2.  ^W  though  Rome 
Heathen  /W/>  ^owe  much  agamft  Chrifts 
Sheep,  Slaying  its  Thoulands,  yet  Rome 
Anti-Chriftian  hath  done  more,  and  far  out 
done  it  in  Slaying  its  Ten  Thoulands  :  So 
that  this  Bealt,  (  above  all  Names,  )  is  a 
Beaft  with  a  Witnefs,  an  Hyperbolical  Behe 
moth,  as  if  many  Beaft s  made  up  One,  (  fa 
the  Hebrew  Plural  Feminine  fignifes,  )  far 
beyond  the  mo{£  Blcud-ThirJty  Wolf,  _yea  the 
mo  ft  Savage  Cannibal,  for  Eating  the  Flefa 
and  Drinking  the  Blond  of  Poor  Proteitants, 
B  2,  evtn 


The  Preface 

even  to  an  high  Inebriation,  as  the  Second  will 
more  fully  Demcnftate  :  Take  but  this  Taft 
/here,  'Tis  credibly  Related,  That  in  the  [pace 
ff  Eight  Hundred  Tears,  this  Monftrons 
Beaft,  (  who  hath  all  Cruelties  Concentred  in 
him,  )  hath  been  the  Death  of  Twelve  Milli 
ons  of  Chriftians.  Idta  Reform.  Antichr. 
Tom.  i.  Part  2.  Sed.  2.  Cap.  6.  To  Inftance 
only  one  Specimen  of  this  Pourtray'd  Eeaft  in. 
this  place,  to  wit,  Pope  JuHus  the  Second, 
C  ivh&  was  turn  d  up  Trump,  and  Triumph' d  in 
the  Chair  of  Peftilence,  in  the  Fifteenth  Centu 
ry  )  that  made  a  jhift  to  Worry  (  in  Seven 
Tears  /pace  of  his  Papacy  )  no  fewer  than 
Seven  Hundred  Tko-tjand  Sheep.  See 
Baleus  de  Adis  Rom.  pontif.  lib.  7.  'Tis 
one  of  Luthers  Divine  Raptures,  that  Cain 
( the  Firft-Born  of  the  Devils  Patriarks  )  foall 
be  Murdering  bis  Brother  Abel  to  the  end  ff 
the  World  :  and  tbe  Older  he  groweth,  the 
mere  Blcud-Thirfty  he  becometh  :  T'his  Romilh 
Runner  (  as  is  commonly  faid  of  the  Com 
mon  in  Dairy  Hcufes )  the  Older  it  is,  it 
grows  Co  much  the  Stronger.  If  the  Eaaft 
were  Jo  Blcudy  in  that  Century  aforementioned, 
how  much  more  may  be  be  expelled  in  this  prc- 
fent  Pope.  Seeing  [  Morfus  moribund;e 
Beftia?  lunt  maxinie  mortiferi,  ]  The  laft 
Ritings  of  a  Dying  Re  aft  arewoftly  me  ft  Dead 
ly  :  and  whether  this  bejettaft,  Sub  Judice 
f  •*  ,. 

lis 


to  the  Reader. 

lis  eft,  'm  a  matter  of  Controverfie ,  and  if 
•not ,  I  would  ask  my  Countrymen  Prote- 
ftants,  Is  this  a  Beaft  fit  to  he  Courted  into 
England  ?  'which  is  indeed  the  Bloudy  Scar 
let-Colo  ur'd  Whore,  that  better  defer  vet  h  to 
he  Carted  out  of  it ,  and  out  of  the  World 
alfo. 

Fifthly,  It  doth  not  appear,  that  the  Wolf  in 
the  Fable  was  ever  retrained  from  any  At 
tempts  by  thofe  frequent  outcries  for  d/fiftaxce, 
feeing  the  Revert  of  his  approaching  was  falfe 
until  the  laft.  But  this  Beaft  of  'Rome  hath 
had  many  fignaland  fingiilarreftraintsby  King 
end  Parliament,  &c.  But  above  all,  by  an  In- 
vi/ible  and  an  Over-ruling  Hand ;  (o  that  foe 
hath  been  conjirained  to  alter  her  Methods,  and 
to  take  new  Me  A fares,  Foifting  her  dead  Brats 
into  the  Bofctn  of  Innocent  Proteftarrts,  which 
though  it  need  not  the  Wisdom  of  a  Solomon- 
to  Discover,  yet  requireth  it  ths  Power  of  a 
Parliament  more  fully  to  Determine,  in  a  way 
of  fondic at ive  ^fuftice. 

Sixtly  and  Laftly,  Iwifowith  all  my  Soul, 
that  there  may  be  found  more  Disparity  than 
Congruity  in  the  Cataitrophe  and  Clofure  of 
ihe  Fable,  as  Relating  to  our  prefent  Gale.  "The 
Apologue  indeed  concludeth  thus^  that  where 
as  the  Husbandmen  had  b?en  eft  abufed  by  the 
falfe  Alarms  of -the  Boy,  leaving  t/xir  Ploughs 
ft  and  ing  Idle,  in  the  Field  to  d'livSr  ihe  Shetv 

B  4 


The  Preface 

when  there  was  -no  Danger  jhenthtWo\£  corn-* 
ing  in  good  earneft  ,  the  Boy  cries  out^   but 
was  not  believed  by  them,  whom  he  had  Jo  oft 
deceived,  hereupon  the  Wolf  prevails  againft 
the  Boy,  Worries  the  Sheep  without  refiftance, 
Gluts  himjelfwith  their  Flefr  and  Bloud,  and 
efcapes  away  fcotfree,  without  fo  much  as  a 
Mow  for   that    unparalleled    mifcheif :    'The 
Moral  of  this  laft  part  is,  as  Solomon,   with- 
his  wonderful  Wijdom,  helps  us  to  Interpret  it, 
faying  ,  VVoe   be  to  that   Land,  that  hath 
£rai'«jw«  A^jOviumPaftorerrfjno  wiferthan 
a  Ch\ld,Eccl.io.i6./llas,He  is  not  able, (though 
never  fo  witting )to  Deliver  his  Flock  fac.  Solo 
mon  faith  alfitBunn  multitude  of  Councel- 
lors  there  is  fafety,  Trov.  11.14.  This  ShepS 
herds  Boy  had  Co  much  Hrit  in  him,   as  to  call 
in  more  helping  Hands  to  his  ownjhcugh  he  did 
oft  cry  fo  Childifhly,  and  at  laft  (through  his 
own  foolifo  fraud)  fruitleily    without  {uccefs**. 
We  have  had  many  loud  Alarms  T'rumpeted 
out,  crying,  [The  Romifh  Wolf  is  coming, 
Help,  Help,]  and  though  none  of  the  many 
have  beenfalfe  outcries,  as  before,  yet  would  to 
Gcd  the    Helping    Husbandmen    -may    not 
(through  fo  many  Disappointments)  grow  wea 
ry  of  ^p^earmgj  fo  let  the  Devouring  Eeaft 
have  his  Blcnd-Thirjly  Luft  fatiated  upcn  the 
Proteltant-Sheep  ,  and  all  this  without  any 
find   oppo/itton.      But    though    this 

Apologue 


to  the  Reader. 


Apologue  of  yfcfbps  be  thus  fignificantly  Cuita- 

bl&tn  its  Moral,  yet  have  we  &  Divine  Para 

ble  (to  Wit,  that  of  Jotharns,  Judg.  9-)  that 

infinitely  TranfcenJs  it  in  it  signal  and/ingttlar 

Signature  as  to  ourpreftnt  Calamitous  Condition. 

Blondy  Abimeleck  (  a  bale  Caltard  )  Ufarps 

the  Kingdom,  which  by  fubtlc  practicing  upon 

his  Kinsfolk  and  tbt  Men  of  Shechem  he 

craftily  compafled,  and  (  by  the  help  of  his 

'Vile  Vagrants  and  Villanous  Followers,  Hired 

with  the  Treasure  o/'Baal-Berithj  as  cruelly 

coniHtuted  the  foundation  of  it,  in  Murdering 

(like  a  bloudy  Tyrant)  Seventy  Innocent,   and 

all  Legitimate  Competitors  to  'make  his  way  to 

the  'Throne,  Good  Jotham  cnely  escaping,  He 

takes  the  boldnefa  (notwithstanding  his  Perfonat 

Danger)  to  make  his  mind  (yea  and  Gods  too) 

known  to  the  Men  of  Shechem  from  the  top 

of  Mount  Gerizim  (tkat  Bleiling,  not  Mount 

Ebal  that  Curling  Mountain)  Before  he  took 

to  his  Heels,  and  fled  from  the  Tyrant.     As 

this  Sacred  Apologue  of  Jotham's,    (  who, 

though  but  a  young  Man,  was  vir  bonus,  di-. 

cendi  peritus,  a  good  Man,  and  a  good  Ora 

tor,  one  that  coiild  declare  his  Mind  fitly, 

and  duril  do  it  Freely,   being  [  VOT^T^   \ 

Inspired  of  Gods    Spirit  )    dc.th   therefore  far 

(  I  fay)    Tranfcend    the    aforesaid  Fable  cf 

yi£fbp,  fo  it  more  highly  merits  a  larger  Def- 

cantutitn  it,  were  I  not  bound  »p  to  the  Narrow 

Limits 


The  Preface 

Limits  of  a.   Short   and  yet  Succinft  Preface.  • 
Hereupon,  all  that  I  am  Allowed  to  Add,  is, 
to  let  the  Ingenious  Reader  know,  that  the  He 
brew  Doftors  do  Understand  by  the  Fig-Tree  in 
the  Parable,  Renowned  Deborah  their  Delive- 
refs,  as  by  the  Olive-tree  Othniel,  or  Ehud, 
and  by  the    Fruitful  Vine,  Gideon  with  his 
Numerous  Off-tyring  ;    what;  is  meant  by  the 
Bramble  needs  not  much  Explication,  it  being 
n->t  a  Tree,  but  a  Shrub  (the  Product  of  Gods 
Curfe  upon  the   Earth,  Gen.  3.  17,18.) 
Prickly,  Barren,  Bafe,  Abject,  good  for  no- 
thivg,  but  to  Stop  Gaps,  or  Kindle  a  Fire  : 
Abimeleck  was  a  Right  Bramble  indeed,  who 
rcw  in  the  baft  He,dg-Row  of  a  Contemptible 
Concubine  ,    who  horribly-  fcratchd  and  drew 
Bloud  topurpofe,  when  once   he   had    (  by  the 
help  of  Baal-Beriths  Treasure)  fcrambl'd  up  to 
a   Dominion  ever  Ifrael,  whcrcunto   he   was 
Handed  hy  his  hired  Eeggerly  Rafcals,   and 
Debauched  Defy  zr  ados  :      The  c/^Ws-n"    or 
Moral  Hereof  (as  to  us)   is  obvious  to  every 
dimmon  Under  (landing,  and  neither   the  Ex 
plication,  nor  the  Application  is  any  matter 
of  Difficulty  :  I  (hati  therefore  conclude  my  Pre 
liminary  part  with  this  pathetical  Epiphone- 
ma,  as  a  Golden  Key  to  open  the  My  fiery 
of  Iniquity  ;  Oh  England,  .England,  Thou 
haft  had  thy   Delivering  Deborah  (  Queen 
Elizabeth)  who  favedthee  in  Gods  Hand  from 

the 


lie  Curled  Canaanites,  that  dtlt  cruelly  with 
thee  in  the  Marian  Days,  Thou  baft  alfo  had 
iby  Othniels,  Ehuds  who  didjtab  the  Red 
Letter  Came  with  their  very  Pens  {as  King 
James  )  excellently  and  unanswerably  Acccnt- 
plified,  though  he  was  but  left  handed /cr  the 
Swcrd,  having  for  his  Motto  [_  Rex  pacift- 
ClisJ  which  one  wittely  Englifatd  [  put  up 
thy  Dagger  Jamy]  And  fome  Abufive  wits 
limn  (I  hm  Tifture  with  a  Padlock  upon  his 
Swcrd,  yet  his  Learned  Writing  did  fo  effec 
tually  vindicate  his  undoubted  Right  again  ft 
Pope  Paul  the  Fifth,  that  there  was  no  need 
cf  Martial  Warring  (Cedant  Arma  Toga?, 
o^c.)  There  was  no  occasion  for  Mars,  where 
Minerva  was  hx  Bellona,  -which  wade  his 
Un-Ho!ine(s  Decline  the  Enaunter  :  Thou 
haft-  likewife  bad  thy  Gideon  with  a  fruitful 
Ofspring,  Jinut  Aflertors  of  the  Reformed  Re- 
ligiov,  fimddft  fhoit  ?  now  fcrjake  the  Fitnefs, 
the  FatnefSj  and  the  Fruitfulnefs  of  thy  Truly 
Noble  Figtree,  Olive  and  Vine  (which  indeed 
hath  cheered  God  and  Man)  ard  at  laft  em 
brace  a  Bale  Bramble,  that  exotick,  dry, 
empty,  Saples  Kex  and  Weed  of  a  Forraign 
Power,  to  wit,  that  of  the  Man  of  Sin,  the 
Son  of  Perdition  and  the  wicked  one,  which 
if  the  threefold  Black-Brand,  wherewith  An- 
tichriil  is  Stigmatised  by  the  Koly  Ghoft. 
Plow  far  this  threefold  Character  agreetb  with 

the 


The  Preface 

the  Pope  ;  Seethe  Man  of  Sin,  lily.  I,  chap.  4. 
Foulis  Hiftory  of  Romiih  Treafons  and  U- 
ftirpations  per  totum,  and  Neiles  Difco- 
very  of  Antichrift,  fag.  $$•.  to  63.  &c.  oy/vzt 
f&dr  6iy»  Aut  hours  Report  of  them  Wizy  &e 
£<?/  believed  :  That  this  Babylonifh  Brat  is  a 
Baftard  like  the  Bramble  Abimeleck,  and 
and  not  Legitimate,  or  Heaven-born,  their 
own  very  Creatures  are  ccnftrained  to  Ccnfefs. 

As  Firft,  Platina,  who  was  the  PopeV 
own  Secretary,  and  Keeper  of  the  Vatican-, 
Library  ,  yea  a  Writer  by  Commijfion  from 
Pope  Sixtus  the  Fourth. 

Secondly ,  Benno  Ufpergenfls ,  cne  of 
Romes  own  Cardinals. 

Thirdly,  And  Math.  Parifienfis  a  Bene- 
didin  Monk  of  the  Monajlary  of  St.  Albans 
here  in  England,  All  theft  three  (  ncne  of 
them  -writing  out  of  "Prejudice,  fo  they  would 
have  bewrayed  their  own  Neft,  but  Imparti 
ally  and  in  Truth}  doe  Unanimously  Defcribe 
the  Popes  to  be  Limbs  of  the  Devil ;  the  I  aft 
of  which  Relates,  HOW  [Diabolug,  &:  Infe- 
roram  Contaberninm,  d^c.]  that  the  De? 
vil  and  All  his  Hellijli  Crew  Wrote  Gratulato- 
ry  Letters  to  the  Pope  and  his  Clergy,  for 
fending  more  Souls  to  Hell,  than  ever  went 
before,  Math.  TarisHift.  Angl.  Gull.  Conqmft. 
Anno.  1072.  pag.  10.  Tea  ncne  cf  them  can 
deny,  but  that  fiwe  eftheYcpes  fold  themfdves 

to 


to  the  Reader. 

to  the  Deuilfor  their  obtaining  of  the  Tofedom 
by  his  Craft.  Therefore  the  Men  of  Shechem 
or  England  need  no  Jotham  to  Proclaim  to 
them,  (feeing  the  'Very  Romanifts  themfelves 
fay  enough}  that  if  in  Truth  ye  Anoint  this 
Pope  to  have  Dominion  over  you,  and  Re 
turn  again  to  put  your  Truft  in  his  Shadow, 
ye  will  be  not  onely  Notoriously  difapointed  in 
your  Shelter  under  fucb  a  Shadow  (for  the 
Bramble-Bufii  cannot  yeild  any  good  shade  ; 
the  filly  Sheep  flying  to  it  for  Jhelter,  are  fure 
to  hfe  part  of  their  Fleece,  if  not  of  their 
Flefo  too)  But  alfo  a  Fire  will  flow  fiercely 
forth  from  this  Bafe  Bramble  to  Devour  you, 
*nd  your  tulle  ft  Cedars  :  This  one  Ternt- 
tilius  cr  Baltard  will  dejlroy  all  your  true* 
barn  Sons :  He  that  hath  but  half  an  eye,  may 
both  fee  and  forefee  the  Matchlefs  mifcheifs 
that  muft  be  its  Conferences,  which  they 
that  are  fo  Hot  for  a  Popim  Siicceflbur 
( while  they  yet  frefefs  themftl-ves  to  be  good 
Proteftants)  dee  not  Duly  and  Truly  Conjider. 
But  1  muft  not  detain  you  too  loug  in  the 
Porch,  fcr  fear  of  your  catching  cold.  Having 
Dtfpatched  the  Prologue,  ccnjijting  of  a  Double 
Apologue,  (which  may  be  further  Illuftrated 
and  dpplyedin  the  Epilogue )  Let  me  now  hand 
you  to  the  Houfe  it  felf,  wherein  you  may  take  a 
plain  Profpettofthis  prefentPope  limn  d to  the 
his  Right  Red  VtrwiKon  Colours. 

1.0. 


•'••  >•»" 

The  Notorious 


F 


._y 

Of  this  prefent 

POPE  of 

XI.] 


His  prefent  Po^e  of  Rome  was  Gxr- 
<7;#£/  Odefchalcbi  of  C0we  in  the 
3«rc/&7  of  Mllaine,  when  called  to 
the  Roman-Chair  ,  whether  we 
wrong  him  in  reckoning  him  among  the 
Bafe  Brambles  of  the  Curfed  Earth,  is  the 
£  T>  'CVTK.AVOV  ]  Poftulatum,  or  Grand  Enqui 
ry.  In  the  General  let  Dr.  Prideaux  give  the 
Anfvver  for  me,  who  Writes  a  Compendious 
Hiftory  of  the  Lives  of  all  the  Popes,  and 
after  he  hath  paft  the  Patriarchs,  (  and  the 
tollerable  Popes  )  He  begins  at  Anno  Dom. 
606.  with  Ufurping  Nimrods  ,  (  a  Worfe 
Name  than  Brambles)  and  Reckons  T&rty 
£/£&/£  Popes  (  Crw/  Hunters  all,  )  from  that 
Year,  to  847. 

The 


2,  The  Notorious  Life 

The  Firft  of  which.  Black  Bed-Roll,  was 
Boniface  the  Third,  and  Leo  the  Fourth  was 
the  Laft. 

His  next  Rank  were  (as  he  Stiles  them  ) 
Rank  Liixurions  Sodomites,  whereof  He  Rec 
kons  Forty,  from  the  Year  8^5- .  10996.  the 
Ftrft  of  them  was  Pope  John  the  Eighth  (  in 
plain  Englifl},  Pope  Joan,  the  Rank  Whore, 
which  God  would  have,  to  Declare  to  all 
the  World,  That  the  Church-of  Rome  is  the 
^pocalyptick  Whore, )  and  the  Laft  of  that 
N  umber  was  Gregory  the  Fifth. 

His  Third  fort  of  Popes,  from  the  Year 
999.  to  1240.  that  He  prelents  to  out 
View,  are  another  Bundle  of  Forty  Popes  a- 
gain,  whom  He  Dignifies  with  that  Ho 
nourable  Title  of  ts£g)p;ian  Magicians  ; 
the  Firft  of  this  Black  Regiment  was  Syl- 
vefter  the  Second,  and  the  Laft  was  Calepwe 
the  Fourth. 

His  Fourth  Profpett  of  Popes  He  giveth, 
is  another  lovely  Cl after  of  Sower  Grapes, 
confifting  of  Eight  and  Thirty  Popes,  from  the 
Year  1243.  to  1^03.  The  Captain  where 
of  is  Innocent  the  Fourth,  and  the  Lieutenant 
( that  brings  up  the  Rear  )  is  Pius  the  Thini, 
AH  which  he  Brandeth  for  a  Company  of 
Devouring  AbadHws,  All  Rad-ones  beyond 
Bounds. 


of  thzs  prefint  Tope  of  Rome.       3 

Yet  ftill  there  be  Tvorj'e  behind,  [  Occupat 
vxtremum  Scabies ,  ~]  which  as  tome  do  Eng- 
lifl),  not  only  the  Scab,  but  the  Devil  Com 
eth  hindermoft.  'Tis  the  Divine  Doom  in- 
flifted  upon  the  Church  of  Rente,  as  an  Apo- 
ftate,  to  be  waxing  worfe  and  wcrfe,  there 
fore  it  may  the  lefs  be  wondred  at,  that  the 
laft  Clajfis  of  Popes ,  (  which  are  the  very 
Dreg!  of  Time,  )  muft  be  the  worft,  and 
thereupon  are  worthily  Stigmatiz'd  with 
the  worft  Appellation.  The  Words  of  the 
Reverend  Author  aforeiaid  ,  Run  thus , 
[  after  the  Devouring  Abaddons,~\  To  fill  up 
the  Myftery  and  Meafure  of  Iniquity,  the  Jr.- 
curable  Babylonians  do  neirt  ftep  upon  the 
Stage,  [  Curavimus  B'abylona ,  &  non  ejf 
Sanata,  jerem.  Jl.  6.  ]  We.  would  have  Cu 
red  Babylon,  but  jhe  could  not  be  Cured,  fcr 
the  reft  of  the  Men  that  were  not  Killed  by 
thole  Plagues,  Repented  not  of  their  (i.) 

urrbersy  (i'J  Sorceries,  f}.)  Fornications, 
(4.)  Thefts,  Revel.  9.  20,  21.  This  laft 
and  worj?  Rank  reaches  from  the  Year 

p3-  to  this  prefent  1683.  betwixt  which 
1'wo  Periods  the  Number  of  Popes  are 
7we»ty-Fi<ve,  (  the  f ewe  ft  Number  of  all  the 
Five  Glades,  yet  have  the  Fouleft ,  both 

atne  and  Nature  )  whereof  Julius  the  5^- 
cond  leads  the  Van,  and  this  prefent  Pope, 
(the  fubjecl;  of  our  Difcourle,  )  brings  up 
the  Rear.  C  I 


4  The  Notorious  Life 

I  would  have  given  forne  ftiort  Remarks 
upon  thefe  feveral  Clafles,  ( thus  dignified 
and  diftinguifhed  with  thofe  Five  aforefaid 
Honourable  Titles, )  and  upon  the  feveral 
Popes,  as  they  ftand  in  Rank  and  File,  un 
der  their  feveral  Banners  in  every  Claffis, 
had  it  not  been  befide  my  prefent  ptirpole, 
and  would  it  not  have  fwoln  this  Difconrfe 
too  much.  I  (hall  therefore  fatisfie  my  felf, 
and  the  Reader  with  Tivo  Remarks  on- 

fy. 

The  Firft  Remark  is,  That  the  Leader  of 
the  Van  in  the  Second  Rank,  is  a  Virago  ra 
ther  than  a  Vir^o^  a  Pope  of  the  Feminine 
Gender,    that  1  aught  Gramarians  to  De 
cline  Papa  with  H#c  not  Hie :    The  name  of 
this  Female  Pope,  (  Job»  or  Joan  )    both  in 
a  Literal  and  Myltical  Senfe,    fheweth  tha^ 
Rome  may  well  be  called  the  Whore  of  Ba- 
lylon,  Rcmifi  Chronologers  have  not  Inferr 
ed  her  Name  in  the  Catalogue  of  Pope?, 
Ifhich  Marianas  Scotus  Renders  this  Reafon» 
fpr,  [_  Propter  Turfituidimm  Rei,    &  Sexitrn 
Muliebrem,  ]    becatife   the  wrong  Gtxeler 
would  be  a  Reproach  to  them.    Wherefore 
to  avoid  the  like  Difgrace,    the  Tfcrfhirf 
Chair,  (  or  Groping-ftool )   was  Ordained , 
Ubt  ab  Ultimo  Diaccno  ,    &"C.      Where  the 
loiveft  Deacon  muft  make  the  Experiment. 
cH.    Hence  k  is,  That  theie  Popes  who 

bar.-; 


of  this  prefent  Pope  of  Rome.        ? 

have  called  themfelves  [  Johns  ]  are  fb  ill 
ordered  in  their  common  Catalogues,  fome 
making  that  John  which  Succeeded  [Adrian 
the  Second  ]  in  the  Year  872.  to  be  John 
the  Eighth,  and  others  John  the  Ninth  :  In 
genious  Platina  forequoted,  doth  only  (  of 
all  the  Romanics )  Recken  Pope  Joan  as  the 
Eighth  of  the  Johns,  and  fb  farward  :  And 
'tis  proboble  enough  (  faith  Dr.  tieyhn,  a 
Man  Fair  and  Favourable  enough  )  that 
God  fuffer'd  that  Proud  See  of  Rome  to  fall 
into  fuch  a  profound  Reproach,  the  more 
to  cat  the  Coxcombs  of  the  Succeeding 
Topes  in  their  Higheft  RufF  and  Riotings, 
and  the  better  to  beat  down  their  Big  Brags 
6f  a  continued  Succelfion  ,  whereof  they 
are  frequently  Bbafting.  As  [  Remember 
j  Lots  Wife  ]  is  a  due  Caution  to  u$,  fb  J  fee 
'not  why  [  Remember  Pope  Joan  _j  fliotild 
not  be  likewife  a  true  Check  to  them  :  The 
Truth  of  this  Story,  as  to  matter  of  Fa6t, 
Mr.  Alexander  Cook  (my  quondam  Prede- 
:elfourj  in  his  Book  of  Pope  Joan  hath  pro 
ved  it  by  Irrefragable  Arguments,  and  hath 
noft  Induftriioufly  batter'd  down  all  the 
3bjedlions  which  the  moft  Mercurial  Wits 
)f  Rome  could  raife  againft  it.  See  his  Book, 
md  Dr.  Heylins  Cofinografhy  in  Folio  the  laft 
edition,  pag.  107.  &c.  i'he  Bafard  Alim:- 
<x-b  aforcmeiuioned  did  Defperately  grudg, 
C  2  '  that 


6  The  Notorious  Life 

that  it  fhould  be  (aid  [  a  Woman  bad  Rraind 
him}  Judg.  9.  f  4.  Sure  I  am,  this  bafe  born 
Brat  of  Rome  (the  He<w/oftheChurch)hath 
Received  (  were  tie  feilfible)  a  Deadly 
Wound  by  the  hands  of  a  Woman  likewife, 
with  this  difference  only,  the  former  was 
Attwe,  and  Defigning,  the  latter  was  Taj- 
five,  and  never  pufpofed  the  Wounding  : 
'Tis  fuch  a  Reproach  to  the  Roman  Chair  as 
will  never  be  wiped  off ;  this  is  the  Semira- 
mis,  the  Amaz>oman  jQueen,  the  She-Captain, 
that  ftands  in  the  Front  of  the  Second  Rank, 
to  wit,  of  the  Luxurious  Sodomits. 

The-Stfofc/  Remark  is,  concerning  Julio 
the  Second,  who  ftands  as  a  flout  Gentralijfi- 
mo  of  the  laft  Rank,  to  wit,  of  Incurable 
Babylonians,  and  He  is  moft  fitly  placed  in 
that  Station,  as  having  far  more  of  the 
Sculdter,  than  of  the  Trelate  in  Him,  keep 
ing  Italy,  all  hisPopedom,  in  continual 
Wars,  and  for  a  pregnant  proof,  that  this 
Romijb  God,  was  a  Man  of  Mettal,  This  is 
the  Pope  ,  who  palling  Over  Tyher-BriJg, 
firft  Brandifh'd  his  Sword,  and  then  threw 
his  Keys  into  the  River,  faying,  If  peters 
Keys  would  not  ferve  his  Turn,  then  Pauls 
Sword  ftiould  do  it  Home. 

Such  a  Ihrafonick  Bravado  would  bet 
ter  become  Julius  C<efnf  the  Empercttr  of 
Rome,  than  Julius  Secundus  the  Bijlmp  of 

R  we. 


df  this  prefent  Pope  of  Rome.        7 

Rome.    But  I  have  been  thinking,  that  'tis  a 
Thowland    pities,    Famous  Pope  Joan  had 
not  her  Lot  in  this  Lalt  Rank  too,  yea,  and 
( were  it  not  to  Dethrone  and  Diipoifes 
this  Heroick  Hector  )    She  might  have  flood 
in  the.  Captains  place  there,  as  She  doth  in 
the  Second  Rank,  [  Detur  dignion  ]  is  the 
Rule,  She  belt  deferring  it :  for  where  could 
that  Whore  of  Babylon  (  as  above  )  be  bet- 
jter  placed  ?    than  among  the  Incurable  B<z- 
\bylonians,    and  where  could  that   Incurable 
\Whore  have  been  better  order'd t    than  in 
I  the  Front  of  that  File  of  Defied  and  Defle- 
ing  Beafts. 

However,    this  prefent  Pope,  Cardinal  O- 
/f&i/afe,   (  who  hath  chang'd  his  Name 
[into  Innccentthe  Eleventh,  )    is  Reprefented 
to  our  View  as  ftanding  upon  the  Tail  and 
[Fag-end  of  thofe  Incurable  Babylonians :  We 
|ii(e  to- lay,  Such  a  perfon  as  Labors  under 
[a  Mortal  Incurable  Dileafe,   hath  a  £  Mife- 
rere  Aid  Detts^  writ  upon  his  Door  :    who 
lit  is,  that  Writes  the  Continuation  of  Dr.  Pri- 
Meathls  Introduction ,   I   know  not ,  yet  he 
[Writes  an  Epitome  of  this  our  Cardinal  Odef- 
t&fo    public  k  Attions  and  Tranfatttons, 
[fince  his  coming  to  be  Groped  in  the  Por- 
\vhyry  Chair  :    and  we  are  much  obliged  to 
Ithat  Author    (  who  ever  he  is  )  for  fixing 
thisprefent  Pope  under  the  Head  of  Incurable 
C  3 


7  be  Notorious  Life 

Babjkvians,  but  I  know  not  (  in  all  the 
World  )  how  to  Reconcile  the  White  Chara- 
tfer  that  Author  givejth  him,  and  the  Black 
Title  he  feteth  over  him.  The  Defcription  of 
his  Life  there,  feems  to  carry  no  Congruity 
with  an  Incurable  Babylonian.  'Tis  great  pi 
ty  ,  that  any  miftaking  Candour  fhould 
make  fuch  a  DHparity  :  but  to  let  that 
pals,  come  we  now  to  give  a  more  full  and 
Impartial  Account  of  his  Rife  and  Begining, 
&c.  So  far  as  Hiftorians  lends  any  light 
hereunto. 

I  find  that  this  Perfon  ( fb  foon  as  any 
Fame  found  him}  had  his  firft  noticed  Ca 
pacity  at  Come,  a  place  of  note  in  the 
Dukedom  of  Mill*in*\n  Italy,  a  Town,  made 
the  more  Famous  by  being  the  Birth-place 
of  the  two  Famous  Plinjs,  and  fituated  on 
the  S0w^-fide  of  the  Lacus  Larius,  which 
from  this  Tcwn  hath  now  the  name 
of  Lago  fli  Como,  through  this  Lake  the  Ri 
ver  Afldua,  runs;  yet  (as  Geographers  lay) 
their  two  Waters  do  not  mingle :  Which 
two  Remarks  hath  occafion'd  in  Me  two 
Urtilies  in  this  mtns  behalf  The  firft  is,  that 
as  Pliny  became  the  more  Famous  for  ftop- 
ping  Trtfpw  the  Kmperonr  from  persecuting 
the  poor  Chriltians  in  the  Empire,  by  wri 
ting  elegantly  to  Him,  that  He  found  no  ' 
greater  fault  laid  to  the  charge  of  the  per- . 

fecartcl, 


of  this  prefent  Pope  of  Rome.        9 

fecuted,  fave  this,  that  they  did  (Cantus 
Ante-lucanos  canere)  fmg  Pfalms  before  day ; 
upon  which  Letter  the  perfecution  ceafed  : 
So  would  to  God  this  prefent'  Pope  might 
write  fuch  an  effectual  Letter  to  the  French 
King  in  the  behalf  of  the  poor  perfecuted 
Proteftants  in  France,  (Hire  I  am,  he  can 
rind  no  worfe  faults  in  them)  fo  flop  the 
perfecution  there,  this  would  make  him 
more  Famous,  than  ever  the  Recovery  of 
his  Regality  $  (he  hath  been  fo  long  contend 
ing  for)  can  Render  Him  :  whereas,  to  be 
outvy'd  by  a  blind  Heathen   (  fuch  was 
Pliny)  in  fhch  a   good  Work  of  P/efyand 
Charity  (which  are  Works  highly  cryed  UP 
,at  Rome)  may  Render  Him  for  ever  Infa 
mous.  Especially  if  He  be  found  to  puih  it 
on  and  promote  it,  inftead  of  putting  a 
ftop  to  it.     The  fecond  Wty  is,  Oh  that  this 
pretended  Vicar  of  Chrift  may  learn  fbme- 
Divine  Leilbn,  even  from  the  very  Nature 
of  his  own  Country-River,  which  will  not 
mingle  its  pure  Streams  with  the  puddle  wa,- 
ter  of  a  corrupt  edftanding  Lake  :  not  to  play 
the  Huxter  in  Sophiiticating,  and  Adultera 
ting  the  truth  of  the  Gofpel,  by  mingling  ic 
with  corrupt  Traditions.    There  is  certain 
ly  moft  Evangelical  Doctrine  in  that  Leviti- 
cal  Law,  tbou  flialt  not  let  thy  Cattle  Gender 
with  a  divert  Kind,  tbou  {lialt  net  Sow  thy 
C  Fie! J 


of  this  prefect  Pope  of  Rome.      1 1 

F/r/?,  Tis  not  eafie  to  Alfign  the  Reafbn 
why  his  proper  yrgnomzn  fthat  ofBenc&ft) 
fhould  become  *ib  dilguftful  to  Hint  as  to 
change  it  into  Innocent  (the  Name  of  his 
Predecellburs  in  the  Chairj  feeing  it  was  (as 
it  fignifiesj  a  bhffed  Name,  and  alfb  the 
Name  of  feme  Popes  before  him,  but  more 
of that  change  of  Names  afterwards,  when 
we  come  to  his  Pepedom. 

Secondly,  There  may  a  more  probable 
conjefture  be- given  for  the  change  of  his 
Sir-Name,  to  wit,  Odtfckalcho,  moreeipeci- 
ally  when  it  is  Allowable  to  give  an  Italiek 
Name  an  Anick  Etymclcgy,  and  fo  [nomen 
quefinotamen~]that  Name  hath  an  evil  Ibund, 
(eht,  and  fenfe,  fignifying  fnot  a  Golden) 
but  a  Brazen  Scxg.  That  which  fents  and 
favours  of  Brafs  (we  iilually  fayj  is  un- 
pleafant  to  the  Palate,  and  'tis  the  more 
likely  this  Name  might  be  difguftful  to  his 
Palate,  feeing  his  Predecedonr  Sergitfs  the 
Second,  even  quarelled  with  his  own  Name, 
which  ( before  lie  was  Pope)  was  [Kocca  di 
Tcrco}  ilgnifying  Swine- Mouth,  or  H<g-Facet 
and  thinking  that  ill-founding  Name  not 
fuitable  to  his  Dignity,  he  therefore  chang 
ed  it.  And  upon  ftich  an  Honourable  Pre- 
fidenr,  if  Hog-Pace  w;as  fb  odious  a  Name 
to  the  former,  why  might  not  alfo  Brafs- 
Face  or  Eraz,cn-Face  fas  a  Face  of  Erafs  is  an 

appro- 


ii  The  Notorious  Life 

approbrious  Phrafe  amongft  usj  be  odious 
to  this  latter. 

Thirdly,  As  to  the  Title  of  Saint  Onu- 
pbrius  he  was  dignified  with  at  Come,  I  (hall 
onely  fay  at  this  time  (though  much  more 
might  be  added )  what  Tradition  tells  us  .of 
tfysQmtpbrittf,  that  he  was  amonkifhMan, 
who  lived  a  folitary  Life  for  fixty  years,  in 
which  fpace  he  faw  no  Man :  had  our  Odef- 
cbalcbo  Imitated  this  monkifh  Patroon  ,  and 
trode  in  this  Pattern's  Steps,  he  had  never  be 
come  a  Cardinal,  much  lefs  a  Pope,  unto 
which  converfmg  with  Men,  and  conveying 
K'mdneffis  to  them  ( to  oblige  their  Votes 
at  Elcxtionj  are  neceilary  Ingredients,  and. 
which  he  to  the  utmoft  improved. 

Fourthly,  As  to  his  being  made  a  Cardinal 
while  at  Come:  this  is  one  of  the  higheft 
pitches  and  pinacles  of  Pride  ( the  very  next 
to  the  lofyff  Spire  of  the  Pope  himfelf)  that 
the  Romifh  Clergy  Afpireto,  for  the  Car.  di- 
nals  are  the  Popes  Senatours  or  Privy  Councel- 
lors,  and  are  called  Cardinal*,  which  is  de 
rived  from  Car  do,  the  Hinge  of  a  Door,  be- 
caufe  upon  them  (as  the  Door  hangs  upon 
the  Hinge,  and  turns  which  way  we  will, 
either  for  opening  or  fhutting)  all  the  im 
portant  Affairs  of  the  Roman  Church  hang 
and  are  turned  which  way  they  pleafe  : 
thus  the  word  ^JCarelln^l}  is  ufually  ufed 

thus, 


of  this  prefent  Pope  of  Rome.      1 3 

thus,  that  whereupon  any  thing  moft  turn- 
eth  and  dependeth,  as  to  Eaft,  We/,  North, 
and  South  ,  are  call'd  Cardinal  Points  of  the 
Contpafs.  Thusalfo  thofe  four  p rincipal  Vcr- 
tues,  [Prudence, Jnftice,  Fortitude,  and  Tew- 
ferance]  are  call'd  the  Cardinal  Vertues.  And 
thus  the  Word  is  generally  taken  to  denote 
fomething  that  is  Chief  and  Principle :  So 
thefe  Cardinals  are  :  But  the  Hinge,  upon 
which  thefe  Cardinals  did  themfelves  at  the 
firft  Hang,  was  very  Low,  and  their  Ori 
ginal  Extract  very  Contemptible  :  For  this 
great  Office  did  creep  into  the  Roman 
Church  thus,  Pope  Marcetius  in  the  Third 
Century  divided  the  City  of  Rome  into  2f 
Partjbes  (  fome  Authors  call  them  Diocefles) 
over  each  of  which  He  appointed  a  Presbyter, 
whole  work  was  Affigned  to  Baptize  Hea 
thens  Converted ,  and  to  Bury  the  Dead 
within  their  ieveral  Precmch :  Thele  were 
afterward  called  Cardinals  ,  or  Principal 
Priefrs,  or  Deacons,  becauie  they  had  f  ^% 
ram  Ammarum  ]  the  Cujre  of  Souls  com 
mitted  to  them,  and  had  others  ('  in  Sacred . 
Orders alfo  )  under  them:  There  be  Three 
forts  of  Holy  Orders,  fb  called,  to  difun- 
gnifh  them  from  their  Four  other  Orders, 
(  Door-Keeper,  Readers,  ExorciJ^s,  Acolyths^ . 
or  Taper-tie anr$>  )  Theie  are  ,  Fir  ft,  The 
Sn!?-Dc<?cws,  (  whole  Office  is  the  Grope, 

ing 


14  The  Notorious  Life 

ing  Work,  &c.  )  Secondly,  The  Deacon 
(  who,  with  the  former,  hath  the  Honour 
only  to  kite  the  Bifhops  Hand  at  the  Ordi 
nation,  )  See  Ro/es  View,  &c.  fag.  45-1. 
The  Third,  Is  die  Prieft,  whom  the  Rifoop 
Kiileth  to  (hew  his  'Parity  in  Refpect  of  Or 
der,  Id;m  Ibidem  Thefe  fame  2f  Priefts  of 
fo  many  Parifhes  in  the  City,  being  always 
fb  nigh  the  Pope,  the  more  that  be  grew  up 
gradually  into  his  -Grandeur,  the  higher 
did  be  draw  up  thefe  Priefts  (  his  Appurte 
nances  )  their  pplhire  all  along  keeping 
pace  with  the  Popes  Pomp,  Adeb  »t  quod  in 
principle  Onsri  fuitf  Tandem  Alie^uanclb  Hf>no- 
ri  efle  C<epit.'  So,  that  which  at  rirft  was 
but  a  Porrand  Burdenrcm  Office,  became  at 
length  an  Employ  of  Dignity  and  Honour  : 
Thus  Dr.  Hqlm  Teftifieth,  That  Pope  Tafcbal 
the  Firft  caufed  the  Priefts  of  the  feveral 
Pariflies  in  Rime, by  reafbn  of  their  nearnefs 
to  his  Perfbn,  their  prefence  at  his  Eledlion, 
to  be  Honoured  'with  a  more  Venerable 
Title,  that  is,  to  be  called  Cardinals,  See 
Cofwgr.  pag.  107.  at  the  Top.  Thus  from 
a  company  of  pitiful  PariJJ)  Priefts  ,  they 
account  themfelves  not  only  Check-Males 
to  Princes,  but  alfb  Compeers  with  Kings 
themlelve? ;  but  indeed  they  ought  to  be 
efteemed  the  principal  Limbs  of  the  Bsaft 
;  yea,  they  are  10  far  Incorpo 
rated 


of  this  prefent  Pope  of  Rome.      I  $ 

raced  with  the  Tope  himfelf,   that  they  muft 
riot  (  forfboth  )    fo  much  as  be  let  Blond 
without  his  (pedal  Licenie ;  'tis  (  no  doubt ) 
for  fear  lealt  the  Head  fhoiild  be  (b  concern'd 
in  thefe  his  Special  Members ,    as  to  Die 
with  them  by  Sympathy  :   The  Number  of 
them  at  their  firft  Roman  Cmfitution  (  for 
want  of  a  Divine  Inftitution  )    were,   as  is 
afordaid ,   Twenty  Five ,    which  Dr.  Pctter 
worthily  Obferves  to   be  the  exadl  Root 
Number  of  Six  Hunndfed  Sixty  Six  ,    the 
Ndmher  of  tie  Beajt  ;   bat  rioWr  they  are 
Multiplied  like  a  Numerous  Spawn,    into 
much  more  than  Doubfe  the  Number  ; 
that  depends  wholy  and  fblely  at  the  Popes 
pleafure,   who  can  Blov^  them  out  of  lifs 
Mouth  as  many  as  he  pleafeth;.  he  can 
Breath  out  a  Cardinal  with  as  much  eaie, 
3s  he  Breaths  out  the  Holy  Ghoft ;    yea, 
fof  Doing  fome  Notable  Jobb  in  Hand,   he 
..can  Breath  out,   or  rather  Spit  out  of  his 
"Palat  or  Pallace,   a  matter  of  Sixteen  Car 
dinals  at  one  Spit,   as  this  prefent  Pope  hath 
lately  done;  Oh  what  an  Improving  Leap  & 
Advance  hath  he  now  made,  whereas  while 
Jie  was  but  a  Cardinal,  he  is  then  but  a  Cre 
ated  Creature  of  the  Pope,    but  now  that  he 
is  become  a  God  Almighty  the  Pope,  he  can 
be  a  Creator  of  his  Creatures  :    Mcnflrum 
Horrendam,  &ro     Prodigious  U'ere  his  Pri- 

vriedges, 


1 6  7 he  Notorious  Life 

viledges,  (  which  not  Cbrift,  but  AnticMf, 
beftowed  upon  him  while  a  Cardinal, 

As  Firft,  When  ever  he  Rode  abroad  to 
take  Frefh  Air,  His  (  Sir )  Reverence  was 
fb  Glorified  (  yet  not  fb  much  as  Chnfl  was 
at  his  Transfiguration  )  with  his  Right  Re 
verend  Reel  Hat,  and  Rich  Robes,  that  the 
Splendor  of  Beth  thefe  DazePd  all  Spefta- 
.tors  Eyes,  yea,  the  very  Blaft  of  his  Body 
but  paffing  by,  Blew  oft  all  their  Flats,  and 
Bore  Ib  hard  upon  them,  as  to  Blow  them 
over,  and  made  them  fall  down  to  Worfhip 
Him,  and  to  ask  of  Him  his  Patriarchal 
BleiTmg ,  which  Fie  rarely  beftowed  with 
that  Ingenuity,  as  He  in  the  Story  did, 
who  in  fb  doing,  laid,  [  Si  Populus  Vult  De- 
cipi,  Decipiatur.  ]  Light  cheap  Words  make 
Fools  fain.  No  doubt  but  His  Shadow,  fas 
he  is  now  Pope,  and  Peters  Succefjor  )  can 
cure  as  many  Difeafes,  as  that  of  Peters  did 
Pope  Innocent  the  Fourth,  Graced  the  Cardi* 
nals  with  a  Red  (  Fools  Cap,  or  )  Hat,  by 
his  Ordinance  in  the  Twelfth  Century ;  and 
in  the  Fourteenth,  Pope  Pius  the  Second  Ad 
vanced  their  Splendor  yet  Higher,  with 
molt- Stately  Scarlet  Gowns,  (  Dr.  Heylins 
.Cofmogr.  pag.  108.  at  the  bottom.)  Thus 
were  they  Attired  in  fuch  Antick,  Gawdy 
and  Pedamick  Dreiles,  as  neither  Chrljt  nor 
his  Ap$ht  ever  Strutted  about  in,  which 

wtlft 


of  this  prefent  Pope  of  Rome.       1 7 

mu ft  Declare  to  all  the  World,  that  this  is 
t he'  dntichrift,  and  none  need  lay  of  Him, 
as  John  Baptift  laid  often  to  Chrift,  [  Art 
tbou  He  that  froald  come,  or  may  we  look  for 
another  ?  1  No,  this  is  the  Red  Letter- Man, 
in  his  Red  Hat  and  Scarlet  Gown.  This  is 
the  Eloudy  and  Scarlet  Coloured  Beaft. 

The  Second  eminent  priviledge  this  Car 
dinal  was  dignified  with  by  his  Creator  the 
'Pope,  is,  that  whatever  condemned  Male 
factor  ( juft  going  to  the  place  of  Execu 
tion)  could  but  he  Ib  happy  as  to  meet  this 
Man  in  his  Ponticalibus  in  the  way  of  his 
Progrels,  He  was  immediatly  to  be  Acquit 
ted,  and  his  Life  Ipared,  that  He  might 
evermore  Admire  and  Adore  this  his  Romtjh 
Saviour.  JTis  pitty  his  clemency  is  not 
more  exercifed  out  of  defign  in  this  Life- 
Saving  Work  :  Oh  what  a  choice  Act  of 
Mercy  might  He  fometimes  do  here  in  but 

fjing  the  way  at  a  right  Juncture,  betwixt 
Newgate  and  Tyburn,  when  his  Pontifical 
•Prelence  is  bleft  with  fuch  an  excellent  Ver- 
tue  as  both  to  fatufe  the  Nations  Law, 
(which  is  mortally  broken)  and  Save  alfb 
the  Life  and  Soul-  of  the  condemned. 

A  Third  Immunity  He  had  alfo  in  that 
Cardinal  Capacity ,  Was  ,  that  no  Cardinal 
can  be  Condemned  for  the  molt  Capital 
Crime,  except  He  can  firft  be?  Convicted  by 

the 


1 8  The  Notorious  Life 

the  Teftimony  of  Seventy  Two  Witnefles. 
By  this  means,  a  Cardinal  may  lafely  ven 
ture  to  be  the  greateit,  Villain  in  the  World, 
not  onely  becaufe  .  the   Canon-Law  faith 
[jZcdefia  fit  liber  a"]  let  Church-Men  be  free 
from  fecular  Cenfures,  butalfb  (though  the 
"aforefaid  may  fail)  if  they  do  but  obferve 
their   own  Jefuitical  Rule  [_Jinoncajie,  ta- 
mm  carte\  He  may  without  hazard  perpe 
trate  Whoredom,  Treafcn,  the  word  of  wick- 
ednefs,   (6  lie  do  it  with  caution,  and  he 
deferves  to  be  hang'd  feventy  two  times 
over,  that  will  aft  his  Villany  in  the  pre- 
fence  of  feventy  two  peribns,  that  may  all 
come  in  as  joynt  Witnelles  againft  Him  : 
The  Law  of  the  true  and  onely  wife  God 
(  fupppfing  the  TeiHmony  of  two  or  tbr.ee 
W$*ejJ'es  luffieient)  is   but   comparatively 
an    Infipid   Sentence:     b;vt    the  Law    of 
their   Lord    God   the    Pope  te  far  more 
profound ,    faying ,    two    or   three   and 
twenty    are   not    enough   of    Withefles , 
even  againft  the    btferiottr  Clergy.     There 
muft   (Guy    they^   be    twenty    (even    a- 
gainft  a  Deacon,  fixty  four  againlta  PrieB'v 
and  feventy  two.  againft  a  B;/h0p-GW;W. 
Dianse  compendium,  pag.  8f.  No  wonder   if 
the  Romifh  Clergy  be  the  greateft  Rogue?, 
and  vileft  Villains  in  the  World  :  No  won 
der  if  rhev  carry  fo  deepr  and  fo  Epidemick 

a  Tine- 


of  this  prefect  Pope  of  Rome.     1 o, 

a  Tindure  as  the  only  and  unparallelM 
Tools  to  be  employed  by  Befasbub ,  for 
urdering  of  Kmgst  Blowing  up  of  Parlia~ 
msi  managing  not  only  Privat  and  Perfo- 
nal  Affafinations,  but  allb  Publick  and  Na 
tional  Maflacres,  to  Aftonifhment  ;  to  (ay 
nothing  of  Burning  down  Cities  and  Mar 
ket-Towns,  and  many  more  MatchJeTs  Mi£ 
thiefs,  whereof  how  far  this  their  Holy  Fa 
ther  (  both  while  Cardinal,  and  when  Pope  ) 
in  Conjundion  with  his  Unhdy  Sons  have 
been  guilty,  the  Sequel  will  Demonftrate 
and  that  Ex  <tbu»Aantl. 

A  Fourth  Priviledg  (or  rather  a  Prero 
gative  )  this  Card'mal  had,  while  fo,  was, 
lhat  whofoever  would  dare  to  Offend  or 
Injure  (  in  any  k'md  )  his  7^rJ?wp  or  Cardl- 
vialfapj  tliough  the  Offence  were  only  an 
opprobrious  Word,  and  though  the  Offen 
der  were  (b  Lofty  as  a  K/y^  or  an  Empsrcr 
( who  apprehend  themfelves  above  the 
tomprehenlions  of  the  Law  )  yet  the  Po- 
pifli  Canon-Law  Runs  thus  (everely  againfl 
them,  £  L&fa  MajeftatK  Ret  Stmt,  cttjus 
cuntf,  fmt  OrJinis,  Imo  Imyerater  ipfe,  &C, 
Et  In  ptenas  Bullte  Cuen^e  Imurrent.  J  Such 
Offenders agaiflft  a  Cardinal  (yea  though 
it  be  the  E*tperar  himfelf )  fhall  be  Judged 
Guilty  of  Higb-TreafoK,  and  (hall  Incur  the 
Pain1?  atvl  Penalties  of  Exccwwankation,  De- 


10      '        '"The  Notorious  Life 

po/ition,  &c.  Was  not  this  ia  Lofty  Beaft 
then  ?  Exalting  himfelf  above  all  that  is  call- 

ed  God>  or  Magtjkrates,  even  of  the  very 
higheit  Form,  2  Thef.  4.  4.  He  might, 
w'ri:.?  in  that  Capacity  only,  challenge  the 
Stouteft  King  or  Emperor,  to  affront  his 
Cardinalfhip,  while  he  flood  thus  ftrongly 
Guarded  by  his  Canon-Law,  to  Batter  them 
clown  with  its  Horrible  and  Terrible  Canon- 
Bullets  ;  nay,  That  Canon-Law  did  not 
only  thus  lecure  his  Perfon,  but  it  aljtb  ex 
tends  to  protect  his  very  Hotife,  and  all ' 
his  Hang-bys,  or  Menial  Servants,  to  all  his 

.Creatures  and  Favourites  in  his  Prefence ; ; 
even  all  thefe  his  Appertinances  are  trou 
bled  with  that  Difeafe  called  \_  Noli  me  Tan- 

.  gere  ]  .They  mult  not  (  forfooth  )  be  twcb- 
ed,  though  never  16  Criminal,  'tis  an  Af 
front  of  the  higheft  Nature,  even  High- 

•  Treafon  it  (elf,  and  therefore  (  with  my 
content )  fhould  any  of  his  Clerks  be  affli- 

.  cted  with  the  Kings-Evil  (  as  they  are  over- 
i  un  with  the  Popes-Evil  )  a  Caveat  mail  be] 
Entred  to  Debar  them  of  the  Royal-Toucb\ 
1'jalt  by  a  Male-Improvement  thereof,  they 
turn  their  G*»0»-Mouth  againft  the  King  : 
How,  neither  the  Cardinal,  nor  any  of  his 
Attendants  (  every  one  bearing  for  his  Mot 
to,  the  fame  with  the  Bafe  Thiftle,  [  Ne m&\ 
me.  Impuna  lacej/it,  ]  none  can  touch  mej 

without! 


of  this  prefent  Pope  of  Rome.       2,  L 

Without  Pricking  their  own  Fingers  )  ftand 
Fortified  with  the  Grand  Diabolo's,  or  Great 
Canons  of  that  Canon-Law.  See  Diante 
Compendium  j  p#g-9$. 

1  he  fifth  Prerogative  this  Cardinal  had, 
above  all  Kings  and  .  Emperors,  is,  Than 
whereas  They,  Poor  Low  Shrubs  (incompa-- 
rifon  of  fuch  a  Tall  Cedar  as  a  Cardinal  is  ) 
muft  humble  themlelves  to  the  very  Fco: 
of  the  Pope,  muft  Honour  the  very  Hia- 
dow  of  his  Shoe-ftrings,  or  rather  Adore 
the  Sparkling  Diamonds  ,  wherewith  the; 
Buckles  of  his  Pantofle  is  moft  Richly  E« 
nambJed,  and  the  Higheft  Honour  that 
thofe  jfoȣ.f  and  Emperours  muft  have  vouch- 
fafed  to  them,  (  a  Glorious  Vouchfofcmenc 
and  Low  Condefcention  in  his  Unbolinefi 
indeed  )  is  only  to  Kits  the  Stinking.  Toe  of 
his  Gowty  Gulls  :  but  when  chis  Cardinal 
came  to  pay  his  Vifits,  and  do  his  Homage, 
unto  his  Mighty  God  Pope  Clement  the  Tenth, 
(  his  immediate  Predec'efibr  )  he  had  the 
Honour  (  without  any  profrrating  poftux-e, 
fave  only  a  flight  Congee  )  to  Kik  his  Ho- 
linefies  Hands,  with  a  Mental  RefSrvation 
too,.  (  Right  Romanift  like  )  wifhing  him 
well  in  his  Grave,  that-  he  might  (  upon 
fiicli  an  .Irrefiftible  Refignation)  yeild  up 
his  Pontifical  Chair  to  him  :  Nay,  the  Royal 
of  Kijjiflg  the  Popes  Hand  only,' 
D~  T,  was- 


12,  Ibe  Notorious  Life 

was  not  all  the  HonoiuHie  had  from  him, 
but  he  is  allowed  to  Kifs  the  Popes  Jttonth' 
too.  Lonnus  the  Jefuit,  in  Aff.  6.  doth  ac- 
knowledg  this  Ceremony  <(  as  to  matter  of 
Fad: )  to  be  the  Cardinals  Prerogative  above 
Kings  and  Entperottrs :  If  the  Rifling  of  the 
Bifhop  by  the  Prieft  at  his  Ordination,  do 
declare  a  Parity ,  as  above :  So  this  like- 
wife  muft  be  an  Indication,  that  a  Cardinal 
is  a  Popes  Fellow,  yet  Advanced  above 
Kings  and  Emperotirs,  (  contemptible  Ti 
tles  and  Offices  to  his )  by  this  mutual  Em- 
bracement.  The  Jjebrew  Rabbins  do  Read 
thefe  wordSj  \_GnalPi  Jehovah^  Dent.  34. 
5".  which  w?e  Tfanflate  [  According  to  the 
Word  of  the  Lord'}  in  this  Senfe,  That  Mc- 
fes  Died  at  the  Mouth  of  Jehovah,  (  which 
indeed  the  Hebrew  Words'  do  Genuinely  and 
Gramatically  fighifie, )  .  as  if  God  had  ta 
ken  away  Mofes  his  Soul  out  of  his  Body 
With  a  Kifs  in  a  moft  friendly  manner  .- 
could  this  Lord  God  the  Pope  (  Clement  the 
Tenth  )  have  done  fb  to  Cardinal  Odefchal- 
cbo,  when  he  Kifs'd  him,  it  had  been  no  bet 
ter  tlian  Qfculiirn  Ifcarioticmn.  rather  a  Trea 
cherous,  than  an  Amicable  Kifs,  in  fpoil- 
ing  his  Market,  of  deligning  to  become  his 
Succeflbr  upon  the  Pajxil  Throne,  and  then 
had  the  World  wanted  him  for  Pope  Innocent 
the  EfevsntB, though  both  the  Place  and  the 

Tifte 


of  this  prefent  Pope  of  Rome.      13 

Jitle  might  have  been  fupplied  by  fbme  o- 
ther  Perfon  :  Had  this  happen'd  fb,  That 
Pope  might  have  cry'd  Quits  for  his  wifhing 
( in  his  Mental  Refervation  afore  mention 
ed  )  the  Pontifical  Chair  before  the  Time  : 
what  lofs  this  might  have  been  to  the  Roman 
Church,  I  know  not,  but  this  I  know  upon 
more  Infallible  proofs  than  his  own  Infallibi 
lity,  that  had  he  Died  at  the  Mouth  of  his  Lortl 
God  the  Pope,  when  that  Complemental  Kifs 
pafs'd  betwixt  him  and  his  Predeceflbr,  he 
had  undoubtedly  pafs'd  off  the  Stage  with 
lefs  Guilt,  the  Horrid  Popifi  Plot,  the  Mur 
der  of  Sir  Edmondbury  Godfrey,  and  a  Thou- 
land  more  Diabolical  Intriegues  fince  that,  will 
lay  with  weight  upon  fome  Bodies  Confei- 
ence  (boner  or  later.  Veniet ,  Fernet,  yd 
mal<*  Judicata  Rejudicahit  Dies:  There  is 
a  Day  coming  ,  which  (hall  Judg  Righte- 
•|  oufly  all  Matters  over  again,  (though 
I  at  prefent  they  be  Hufh'd  wp  in  Judg- 
!  ment  )  and  this  may  be  done  even  in  this 
'  Worlcf. 

I  add  to  all  the  former  the  Sixth  Privi- 
ledg,  For  (b  many  rnuft  be  the  Number, 
that  it  may  the  better  Symbolize ,  and 
carry  a  Correfpondency  with  the  Number 
of  the  Eeafts  Name,  which  confifts  of  Three 
Sixes,  [666.]  and  therefore  (everal  Pope* 
bore  the  Number  of  Sixtut ,  and  had  I  been 
D  ?  of 


^.4  The  Notorious  Life 

of  the  Conclave  (  an'  Honour  I  am  no  way 
Ambitious  of )   I  would  have  advifed  trie 
Cabal,    that  this  Pope  Eleti  ftiould  have 
taken  upon  him  no  other  Name,    fave  that 
former  Name  of  Sixtus,  and  I  would  have 
prefs'd  this  Cogent  Argument,  That  feeing 
there  had  been  before,  Sixtus  the  Firft,   the 
Second,   the  Third,  the  Fourth,   and  the 
Fifth,  now  One  that  will  be  Stiled  Sixtus  the 
Sixth,    not  only  makes  the  Odd  Number 
Even,    but  alfo  the  very  Name  will  carry 
along  with  it  a  moft'  Grateful  Sound  and 
Symphony  :'  This  only  would  have  been 
the  nrifchief  thereof,    that  it  might  have 
Bordered  a  little  too  near  the  Number  of 
the  Name  of  the  Apocalyptick  Beaft,  for 
this  Name  would  have  conlirted  of  Two 
Sixes,  (  Sixtus  the  Sixth  )    but  that  Name 
confifts  of  Three  :     notwithftanding .  this 
little  difference  (  in  an  Unit)  it  might  have 
Sounded  fbme  Alarm  to  the  World  :    This 
fo  much  neceilary  Sixth  Priviledg  which 
this  Cardinal  OcUfcbalcbo  had,    was,   That 
his    Cardinalihip    did    Conftitute  him  an 
Ecclefiaftick  Prince,    whereby  he  became  a 
fit  Mate  and  Side-Fellow    (  (landing  upon 
equal  and  even  Ground  )    with  the  molt 
Potent  Secular  Prince  in  Europe,   and  there- 
Tore  to  Comport  with  this  Princely  Great- 
nsfs,  the  Canon  Law  allows  him  a  propor 
tionable 


of  this  prefect  Pope  of  Rome.       i  $ 

t  ton  able  Grandeur,    Sumptuous  Furniture, 
and  all  manner  of  Pompous  Splendor  for 
Supporting   the  Honour  of  that  Dignity, 
for  to  be  one  of  the  College  of  Cardinals 
is  the  Penultimate  Promotion  in  the  Roman 
Church,    it  being   the  very    Higheft  and, 
Uppermofc  Step,  from  which  one  or  other 
of  thefe  Crafty  Climbers,  Lands  at  laft  into 
Deters  Chair.      And  feeing  Wealth  is  an  In- 
difpenfible  Perquifite,   as  it  is  commonly 
call'd  the  Sineivs  of  War,   io  'tis  no  leis  the 
Nurfe  to  Honour j    yea,  oft  times  more  than 
Vertue,    upon  this  account ,  Their  Canon 
Law  allows  them  moft  Rich  Revenues  , 
moft  Rapacious    Offices    and  Employs  , 
wherein  ( as  if  they  had  got  the  Pbilofophers 
Stone )    they  turn  all  they  touch  into  Gold 
and  Guineys :   The  Italian  Author  of  the 
Juft  weight  of  the  Scarlet  Gcwny    gives  a 
Candid  and  Ingenuous  Account,    ( keeping 
the  Scales  even  )    of  thole  Crafty  Intrigues, 
and  manv  Subtle  Tricks,    that  thofe  Arch- 
Polkicians   do  put  in  Praftice  to   Enrich 
themfelves,   to  fill  their  Cotters  by  Sale  of 
Offices  that  are  Vacant,   by  Penfions  from 
the  Court  of  Foreign  Princes,    (  botli  France, 
Spain,  and  Germany }    who  all  ftrive,    not 
only  to  Counterbalance  one  another,    buc 
alfo,  by  a  pretty  Greafc-Fifto,  with  Yellow 
Ointment  to  Tilt  the  Ballance,  and  Id  fome- 
D  4  times 


16  The  Notorious  Life 

rimes  Advance  their  own  Faction  upper- 
moft,  through  the  prevailing  Intereit  of 
thofe  their  -cloiely  obliged  Creatures  the 
Cardinals,  who  have  fiich  a  mighty  Influence 
upon  all  Debates  and  Refblves  in  that 
fragmatick  and  Superintendent  Court , 
which  Lords  it,  and  Laws  it,  ( or  at  leaft 
would  willingly  do  fo )  not  only  over  Gods 
Herrttage  the  Church ,  but  alfb  over  the 
whole  Habitable  World. 

The  Scarlet  Gown  Author,  in  his  Epift. 
Dedic.  fpeaks  of  the  feveral  Applications 
that  are  made  to  this  Confiftory  of  Cardi 
nals,  from  all  Popifh  Yrinces  and  States, 
efpecially  from  the  Two  Mighty  Kings  of 
France  and  Spain  ,  by  their  Amballaclors, 
whoever  lay  Ledger  at  that  Court,  and 
who  always  Addrefs  themfelves  to  the  moft 
Politick  and  Powerful  of  thefe  Cardinals, 
driving  to  Outvie  each  other  in  their  proffer 
of  Fat  Penllbns  to  them,  giving  them  the 
bett  Spiritual  Dignities  and  Promotions 
thtir  l\vo  Kingdoms  can  afford  them  , 
C  which  in  either  of  them  are  plentiful 
enough  )  provided  always,  they  will  be 
engaged  thereby  to  Efpoule  (  as  much  .as 
ever  they  may  )  the  Interefts  of  their  Be- 
nefadors  Crown,  to  which  they  are  thus 
obliged.  Herein  thefe  Court-Penfioners  do 
Try  the  Trick  of  a  Treacherous  Judasy 

' 


of  this  prefent  Pope  of  Rome.      1 7 

(  who  with  his  F  JQuld  Dabitis?  ]  What  will 
ye  give  rrn  ?  and  I  ivill  betray  my  Innocent 
Mafter,  &c.  )  rather  than  play  the  part  of 
Faithful  Peter,  (  whole  Sncceliors,  though 
unlike  him,  lave  only  in  Denying  his  Lord, 
they  would  be  reputed  )  in  Defending  his 
Innocent  Matter  from  thole  that  Aiiaulted 
him  :  for  notwithstanding  never  Ib  ftrong 
Engagements  and  Adiiranpes ;  Oh  what  a 
flippery  Hold  either  or  both  thole  great 
Princes  have  of  thele  their  Cardinal  En 
gines,  who  frequently  (  and  upon  very 
flight  occaiions  _.)  are  found  to  warp  into 
the  contrary  Faction,  which  Verifies  the 
Vulgar  Proverb,  57/>  Hard  to  make  a  Fa ft 
Bargain  with  a  Loofe  Chapman  :  They  how 
ever,  in  playing  thus  at  Faft  and  Loofe  can 
notably  ferve  their  own  Ends ,  and  like 
Bac}  Lawyers  can  take  a  Bribe  upon  both 
Sides,  when  they  are  Courted  by  both  the 
Kings.  Elpecially  thole  Cardinals  that  fit 
nearelt  the  Papal  Chair,  arid  are  in  the 
fairelfc  Capacity  to  Climb  next  into  it,  as 
was  the  Happy  Cafe  of  this  our  Cardinal, 
and  therefore  muil  be  Highly  Courted  by 
j  Foreign  Age  fits  4n  the  \rame  of  their  Ma 
tters  ;  The  Height  of-  whole  Ambition  it 
was  to  oblige  him.  Thus  we  lee  this  Bene 
detto  O&fd'jicbo  had  fair  opportunities  for 
gaining  Wealth  enough.  $o  maintain  bis 

Grandeur 


2.8  The  Notorious  Life 

Grandeur,  the  Canon-Law  doth  Com 
mand  thefe  Cardinals,  that,  befides  their 
Living  upon  the  Churches  Revenues,  to 
catch  what  they  can  for  themfelves,  (  may 
we  Add,  'Per  Fas  &  Nefas  ,  Vd  Vi ,  Vd 
Clam  ,  Vd  Trecano,  either  by  Hook  or 
Crook,  to  wit,  the  Crofier  Staff,)  upon  the 
Account  of  Aggrandizing  the  Roman  Cler 
gy,  which  Poverty  would  render  Contemp 
tible,  Diantf  Compendium,  pag.  88. 

How  far  this  Cardinal  comply'd  (  as  who 
of  that  Catholick  Faith  would  not  )  with 
that  Canon-command  ,  we  fhall  have  an 
Account  By  and  By  :  But  before  we  can 
come  to  that,  Here  are  Two  mifchievous 
Stumbling- ftones  lays  in  our  Way  like  aCou- 
pje  of  Blockade's,  which  who  ever  were 
able  to  Roll  away  out  of  our  Way,  would 
do  us  a  very  great  Kindneis ;  when  let  faft. 

The  Fir/}  is  this,  Suppofe  this  Cardinal 
had  been  a  Monk,  'tis  not  to  fuppofe  what 
ought  not  to  be  fuppofed;  for  feme  Ecne- 
dith  (as  his  Fore-Name  and  fbme  Popes 
Name  were  )  had  been  Bcnedittine  Monks, 
and  at  their  entrance  into  their  Monafteries 
had  fblemnly  vowed  perpetual  Po<ve rty ;  how 
could  this  Monkifh  Man  with  a  good  Con- 
fcience  Relinquifh  his  vowed  Poverty  ?  Ga 
ther  Riches  (b  fall  that  he  got  the  Devil  and 
qll,  (as  will  appear  afterwards )  became  an 

Ecclefi- 


of  this  prefect  Pope  of  Rome.      19 

TLcdefiaftick  Prince,  Ride  his  Progrefs  in  all 
Prince-like  Equipage,  never  proud  Ilaman 
more  Highly   Honoured ,  and  never  any 
Triumphant  C*f*r  or  Conquerour  better' 
Arrayed  than  He  in  his  Richeic  Robes  for 
Splendour  and  Glory .-  Let  any  Man  come. 
forth  and  tell  me  the  Confiltency  of  thele 
two  Contraries,  &  erit  mihi  magnus  Apollo. 
He  that  can  rightly  Reconcile  them,  (hall 
be  my  Oracle. 

Tufh  (  faith  the  Romifh  Cafuifts,  one  of 
the  New  .Quacks  the  Jefuits )  I  can  with  a 
wet  Finger  make  thefe  two  Contraries 
Jump  friendly  into  one ,  two  odds  make 
even  (  as  Two  odd  Threes  make  even  Six, 
flill  he  will  harp  upon  the  Number  Six,  as 
above  )  and  why  may  not  two  at  odds  meet 
in  even  alfo.  This  is  the  Learned  Glofs  of 
the  Popifh  Cafuifts  upon  this  Cafe  of  Con- 
fcience  in  the  General,  but  more  particular 
ly  f  he  faith)  this  Vow  of  Poverty  was  taken 
with  a  mental  Reiervation,  that  he  refolved 
to  be  poor,,  no  longer,  than  while  he  could 
not  poffibly  be  Rich,  and  16  the  word  [?#•- 
fettitQ  in  the  Vcw  muft  be  vox  xqui'voca, 
and  to  be  taken  with  equivocation,  &c. 

Such  Dirt-Dawbers  (that  Dawk  with  un- 
temfer^  Morter)   are  the  Jefuitical  Cafoifts, 
yea,  many  Mor.ks  can  play  the  pranks  of  a 
Monkey  (there  is  not  much  difference  be 
twixt 


Y~>  "The  Notorious  Life 

twixt  their  Names  )  who  can.  flip  his  Col 
lar  on  for  his  Makers  Pleafure,  and  with  as 
much  eafe,  can  ilip  it  olf  again  fir  hts  own, 
The  Monk  can  play  at  fait  and  loofe  with 
his  ftrift  Vow  as  well  as  the  Monkey  with  his 
flrait  -dollar.  But  above  all  Caliiifts  that 
fpealc  home  to  this  Cafe,  hear  what  an  In 
fallible  Pope  ($4JM  in  Cathcdr*  r\on  poteft  er- 
vare)  and  that  Innocent  the  i  otb,  (  one  of  the 
laft  before  this  )  fpeaketh ;  He  furely,  ean- 
not  fpeak  but  like  a  moft  profound  Oracle  : 
I  have  heard  fbme  judicious  Clients  fay, 
when  I  want  Councel,  I  will  go  to  the  Head, 
and  not  to  the  Tail,  meaning,  to  the  pro- 
foundeit  Councellors  at  Law,  and  not  to 
the  mean,  pittiftil,  underling  Lawyers :  let 
us  do  ft>  here,  omitting  all  other  Icribling 
puny  Cafuilts  in  Popiflj  Schools ,  and  hear 
what  this  great  Oracle  faith  out  of  Peters 
•unerring  Chair :  This  1}ope  Innocent  the  Tenth, 
when  he  was  but  Cardinal  Tawphilio,  made 
a  promiie  in  the  Conclave  to  Marry  his 
onely  Nephew  into  the  Family  of  the  Bar- 
berinos  (  one  of  the  three  grand  pontifical 
Factions,  Paulino  and  Pamphilian  being  the 
other  two,  in  that  Sacred  Colledge  or'Con- 
llftoryj  the  fame  Fromiie  he  privarly  made 
to  his  Nephew  allb;  howbeit,  he  fbon 
chang'd  his  mind  ( being  then  not  in  the 
hair  and  fo,  nor  Infallible)  and  pro- 


of  this  prefect  Tope  of  Rome.      3 1 

moted  Him  to  a  Scarlet  Goivn  (inftead  of 
a  Wife,),  which  was  far  better,  and  which 
( he  thought )  would  beft  prevent  divers 
Emergent  Ditferencies  that  were  likely  to 
arife  by  Marrying  one  of  the  Pampbilian 
Family  to  a  Wife  of  the  Barberinos ,  a  con 
trary  Faction,  which  yet  had  been  whead- 
led  into  a  Beleif  of  this  great  Match  for 
their  She-Cozen,  beca'ufe  it  was  16  folemn- 
ly  and  pnblickly  promifed  by  the  Cardinal 
(the  tinkle  of  the  Gentleman,  or  in  plain 
er  Terms ,  the  -Father  of  the  Baftard  )  in 
their  Sacred  Colledge  of  Cardinals,  where 
there  was  a  dead  weight  of  Living  Witneiles 
thereof.  Notwithftariding  this  Promise  ,  -a 
Sacred  thing  in  it  felf,  made  in  a  Sacred 
place,  and  before  fo  many  faered  Perfbns 
(according  to  Popifh  Sentiments)  he  made 
a  fhift  to  cozen  both  them  and  their  S/je-Cc- 
zen  :  whereupon,  not  long  after  His  Af- 
fumption  linto  the  Papal  Chair  (no  doubt 
but  his  'Nephew  in  his  new  Scarlet  Gown, 
gave  his  Uncle  an  heaty  lift  thither  J  Cardi 
nal  Antonio  Barberinost  having  ftill  the  grum 
bling  of  his  Gizzard  for  the  late  cheating 
affront,  makes  his  Addrefs  to  his  New-Gre- 
ated  and  Now-Crowned  Holmefs  fexped- 
ing  nothing  but  what  was  Holy  Redreires 
fuitable  to  his  new  Title,  to  fweeten  unto  all 
his  new  Crown  and  Dignity)  He'  therefore 

brake 


3  a  The  Notorious  Life 

bnke  out  into  thofe  words  to  this  new  Pope 
Innccent  the  i  Qtb.  (into  which  he  had  chan 
ged  his  Name  Pamvhylio}  laying,  Maft  Blef- 
fed  bather  •>  your  7ran(affions  about  your  Ne- 
^heiv  (in  Marrying  him  to  a  Scarlet  Gown, 
and  not  to  cur  Ccz>en)  doth  n~:  well  correspond 
with  your  promijes  made  to  us  in  the  Conclave, 
when  you  was  but  Cardinal :  Hereupon  his 
new  Un-Holi»efs  (with  a  great  deal  of  Gra 
vity,  as  became  his  Place} as  Un-Holily  An- 
(wered,  thus  fay  ing,  Tell  me  my  Lord,  who 
was  He,  that  made  Jttch  promifes  to  you  P  W 'as 
it  not  Cardinal  Pamphilio  ?  Yes,  faith  Anto 
nio,  upon  which  the  Pope  turns  fliort  upon 
him,  and  bids  him  go  challeng  his  Promife 
of  Pampkilio ,  for  he  was  not  the  Man  of 
that  Name  now,  His  Name  was  Innocent 
the  Tenth,  and  not  that  Man  you  Imagine 
me  to  be  :  At  this,  Antonio  Raged,  and  like 
a  new  M&ngi  Bella,  Fire  ftarted  out  of  his 
Eyes,  and  like  Old  Orlando,  ftamps  with  his 
Feet  upon  the  Ground,  when  he  heard  the 
Infallible  Chair  (peak  more  Fallibly  and  j 
Fallacioufly,  than  ever  the  Devil  did  at  his 
Delphos-Oracle  :  In  this  Tranfport  his  , 
Voice  alfb  Vomited  out  ibme  levere  Inve- 
dives  againft  his  Lord  God  the  Pope,  and 
in  an  High  Diiguft,  Uncivilly  turns  his  Tail 
upon  his  Blafphemed  ,  as  well  as  Dial-  . 
pheming  Idol ,  Excommunicates  himfelf 

from- 


of  this  prefent  Pope  of  Rome.      3  3 

from  the  Sacred  Conff/tory,  and  from  the 
Metropolitan  City  of  Rome  (the  very  place 
of  his  own  Nativity  )  flies  into  France  to  be 
Protected  by  the  French  King,  at  whofe 
Devotion  he  had  all  along  been  in  the  Fa 
ction,  leaving  all  his  Riches  (  he  had  Vaftly 
(craped  together  )  and  Revenues  behind 
him  :  See  the  Subftance  of  this  whole  Sto 
ry  in  the  Author  of  the  Jujt  Weight  of  the 
Scarlet  Gown,  his  own  Preface  to  his  Book  ; 
who  tells  us-  likewife,  fag.  68.  That  this 
Bon  Antonio  Barberino  (  who  thus  Dif-refent- 
ed  this  profound,  more  than  Jefuitical,  the 
Diabolical  Salvo  of  his  Holy  Father  )  was 
none  of  the  Belt,  who  kept  for  his  Mifs  or 
Whore,  La  Checa  Bufona,  upon  whom  he 
waited  molt  Vaft  Sums  of  Money,  &c. 
fag.  69. 

Mark  here,  This  Papal  Qiftin&ion  with 
out  a  Difference  ( to  wit,  it  was  not  Inno 
cent  the  Pope,  but  Pampbilio  the  Cardinal, 
that  made  the  Promile,  and  therefore  not  at 
all  obliging ,  &c.  )  is  the  Beft  Bramble- 
Bum,  that  the  Infallible  Chair  it  felf  can 
find  out,  wherewith  to  Itop  the  Gap  in  a 
Romifo  Conference  ;  and  if  this  will  ferve 
as  a  fufficient  Salvo  for  the  Supreme  Pope 
himfelf,  much  more  for  his  Underling,  a 
Cardinal ;  and  16  our  Odefchalcho  is  brought 
off  with  flying  Colours ;  It  was  not 


34  The  .Notorious  Life 

cbalcho  the  Cardinal  that  Vowed  perpetual 
<verty,    it  was  only  OJcQk&fo  the 
that  did  fb,    I  arti  not  He  that  made  that . 
Vow,  'tis  not  obliging  to  me,  as  a  Cardinal, 
but  leait  of  all,  as  now  I  am  Pope. 

Such  ilippery  Tricks  of  the  Monkey,  we 
find  the  Jefuits  can  play  ,  as  well  as  the 
Monks ;  for  Cafi'fntr  the  Jtfuit  Could  (;by 
his  Fervent  Prayers  to  his  Founder  Ignatius 
Loyola  )  obtain  an  elfecliial  Diipenlation  for 
his  Acquitment  from  his  Holy  Orders  to  Em 
brace  a  Crown,  the  Jewels  whereof  had  a 
ctovereign  Vertue  to  Salve  all  Wounds  of 
Conicience,  and  to  give  him  a  Quietus  Eft  : 
Hereupon  he  became  the  King  of  Poland : 
but  while  I  think  of  it,  Take  this  pleafant 
Story,  I  have  fometimes  Read  with  com 
placency,  'tis  this,  The  Bimop  of  Triers  (I. 
think,  but  am  fare  it  was  ope  of  thole  Bi- 
ihops  that  are  the  -Electoral  Princes  of  the 
Emperour  of  Germany  )  was  found  fault 
with  for  -feme  Notorious  Extravagances  in 
hisPublick  Miniftration?,  by  a  very 
S&wtor,  Who  told  him,  Such  Grofs  Actings 
were  a  Scandal  to  his  Lawn  Sleeves  and 
Mitre  ;  all  the  Apology  that  Proud  Prelate 
could  make  for  himlelf,  was  this,  He  An- 
•fwered,  That  he'did  not  thole  things  as  he 
was  a  Bifocp,  but  as  he  was  a  Prince :  But 
Replies  in  a  cutting  Reprimend, 

faying,] 


tf  fbis  prefent  Pope  of  Rome,     y 

faying,  If  the  Devil  git  the  Prince  for  fuck 
rimes,  I  pray  yottj    what  will  become  of  the 
Bifiop.    This  Non-pins  did  not  admit  of  a 
ilejoinder ;   and  is  there  not  par  Ratio  in 
:>oth  thefe  Cafes  of  Conference  aforemen 
tioned  ,  If  the  Devil  get  Pantphilio  the  Car 
dinal  for  breaking  his  Promife,    (  contrary 
to  Pfal.  i  f .  )  what  will  become  of  Jnnocem 
the  Pope ;  .it  may  be,  he  hath  got  them  Both 
together  at  one  Mouthftil  (  being  but  one 
Individual  Man  )  already,   feeing  Pope  la* 
wcent  the  Tenth,   who  Was  before,  Cardinal 
Pantpbilto,  is  now  Trip'd  off  the  Stage,  and 
our  Qdefchakho  is  got  into  the  Chair  in  his 
Room  :    So  likewife,   If  the  Devil  get  the 
Monk  for  breaking  his  Vow  of  perpetual  Pe- 

rty,  what  will  become  of  the  Rich  Cardi- 
•nal,  fure  I  am,  Though  the  Devil  hath  not 
already  made  one  Mouthful  of  them  both., 
yet,  the  Pope  (  the  Devils  Eldeft  Son  )  hath 
done  it,  for  both  Qdefchalcbo  the  Monk  (  as 
fbme  fay  )  and  Qdefchalcho  the  Cardinal  are 
at  once  Swallowed  up  by  this  prefent  Pope, 
Innocent  the  Eleventh. 

The  Upfhot  of  the  whole  in  a  word  is 
this,  I  Refer  to  the  Judicious  Reader,  whe* 
ther  this  Grave  Senator,  or  the  Jefirits 
(  Azoriuf,  Navar,  &C.  )  yea  the  Infallible 
Chair  it  felf,  be  the  better  Cafuift ;  and  Whe 
ther  Dm  Antonio  Barberind,  the  Crook-Back 
E 


}  6  The  Notorious  Life 

Nephew  to  Pope  Urban  the  Eighth,  were 
not. a  Str  (lighter  Man  of  the  Two,  that-'Ab- 
hord  thofe  wicked  Evafibns  of  Pope  Inno 
cent  the  Tenth,  as  above. 

But  having  well  wearied  both  my  Setf 
a-nci  my  Reader,  with  lifting  at  this  great 
Stone  that  lay  in  our  Way,  and  yet  cannot 
get  it  Removed  out  of  the  Way  h&lf  *  fo 
well-as  was  ^wtf/tf'sStab'dBody,  that  ftop'd 
the  March  of  the  Army,  2  Sam.  20.  12. 
'Tis  high  time  to  leave  it ,  and  to  try  our 
Strength  in  a  Lift  or  Two  at  the  Second, 
which  in  like  manner  obftrufts  our  pallage, 
HI  giving  a  particular  Character  of  this  pre 
fect  Pope. 

The  Second  Objection  is,  Whether  thefe 
pretended  Governors  of  die  Church,  the 
Popifh  Prtlaies  and  Cardinals,  abounding  in 
all  manner  of  Pride,  Pcmy  and  Luxury,  can 
by  any  Ibber  Mind  be  Deemed  the  Rightful 
Succelibrs  of  Chrift  and -liis  slpoftles,  who 
nil  did  fb  oft  Recommend  Self-Dexyal  and 
Humility,  &C. 

To  this,  in  ihort,  I  mall  AnRver,  with  a 
•Sibry  that  1  have  Read  many  Years  ago, 
•and  \vhich  1  have  lately  met  with  in  the  Hi- 
ll-ory  cf  Cjri!hi<:!s,  pag.  46.  The  Author  of 
'I\ipotifwo  dl  Roma,  (  wherein  he  fhews  ho\v 
^'edu'oiis  every  Pope  is  to  promote  his  Ne- 
phcu?  or  Baitards)  Relates  the  Matter  of 


of  this  prefent  Pope  of  Rome.      3  7 

Pact  thus,    being  both  an  Eye  and  an  Ear' 
Witnefs  thereof  in  Perfbn  himfelf,    laying, 
I  Remember  a  certain  Sermon  I  heard  in  a 
Covent  in  Rome ,  and  in  the  prefence  of 
Two  Cardinals,  (  it  may  be  our  Odefcbalchv 
was  one  of  them  )   and  Cardinal  Saccbettt 
was  the  other  ;   The  Preacher  was  a  Bare 
Footed  Francifcan,  who  feem'd  a  poor  pitiful 
Creature  to  look  upon,   yet  geting  into  the 
Pulpit   (  on  the  firft  Sunday  in  Lent  )    in  a" 
:very  great  Auditory,    after  an  Ave-Mana, 
land  Two  or  Thfee  Ciringes  (asisufualj 
with  his  Knee,    rifing  up  again  upon  his' 
Feef,    and  pulling  his  Cappuce  or  Cowle 
upon  his  Head,  down  almolt  over  his  Eyes, 
he  paufed  a  while  (  in  this  poftnre)'  with 
out  fpeaking  a  word,   and  fixing  his  Eyes 
Iftedfaltly  upon  the  Cardinals  that  ftood  be- 
jlbre  him,  without  Naming  any  Text  at  all, 
lie  breaks  out  abruptly  into  theie  words/ 
•ct.  Peter  was  a  Fool,    6't.  'Paul  was  a  Fool, 
till  the  Apoftlcs  were  Fools,  all  the  Holy  Mar- 
\)rs,  all  the  Primitive  Saints  &f  the  Church  of 
\fefns  Cbrift  cur  Redeemer,  were  Fools.  J 

The  Cardinals,  were  Ih'angely  Stun'd  with 
jhefe  words,  and  flood  as  Infeiifible  as  Two 
[tames,  the  People  alfb,  and  I  among  the 
(eft,  Admiring  this  unuftial  Freak,  were 
lonccnr  enough  to  Attend  the  Attendency 


f-  If  it ;    The 


after  foffle  fiiiair  filenci: 
>•  ( 


}S  7 'he  Not  or  I  oiu  Life 

( which  he  purpofely  did,  to  oblerve  the 
Refentments  of  his  Auditory  )  began  his 
Difcoiirfe  as  followeth,  [  You  that  tire  Pre 
lates,  do  not  you  believe,  you  frail  be  Saved! 
I  know  your  Anfwer,  Tes ,  Father  Fryar, 
we  do.  And  you  People,  you  are  certain  of  Pa- 
radtfe  ?  without  Doubt,  you  will  fay,  Tes 
too.  Tes,  faith  the  Fryar,  What,  will  Turning 
Night  into  Day,  by  Feafting,  Sporting  and 
Luxury  ?  Will  Frequenting  Play-Houfes, 
Whore-Houfes,  and  a  Living  in  all  manner 
of  Debauchery  ,  bring  you  [_  People  ]  to 
Heaven  ? 

As  for  you  [  Prelates,  ]  Will  your  WTear- 
ing  Purple  aad  Scarlet,  Will  your  Glittering 
in  Gold  and  Silver,  Will  your  Riding  a- 
broad,  and  Carreeceing  about  in  Gawdy 
Coaches,  and  when  you  come  out  of  them, 
Will  the  having  your  Silken  Trains  carry'd 
after  you  in  the  Street,  bring  you  to  Hea 
ven  ?  Will  your  Spoiling  the  Walls  of  the 
Church,  to  Adorn  the  Walls  of  your  Cham 
bers,  and  will  your  Subtrafting  from  Cbrijl, 
to  beftow  upon  the  World,  bring  you  thi- 
thither  ?  Would  you  Oh  Rvmtpiff,  be 
Saved  in  this  manner  ?  Is  this  the  way  to 
Salvation  ?  which  we  are  told  is  not  a  BroaJ 
but  a  Narrow  Way. 

Then  certainly  ail  the  Afofhs ,    and  all 
the  Saints  of  the  Primitive   Cbufcb  might 

have 


40  Tl:e  Notorious  Life 

Colour  in  .both  their  Complexions  ,  and-, 
when  fome  Cardinals  blamed  him  for  putting 
an  Abufe  upon  their  holy  Predecellburs  (to 
Limn  them  more  like  Good  Fellows,  who  had 
been  taking  a  Cup  of  Nims,  a  little  too 
much  of  the  comforting  Creature  )  He 
Smartly  yet  Modeftly  Anfwered,  No,  Gen 
tlemen,  you  miftake  my  Genuine  meaning, 
for  there  you  may  behold  thofe  two  Holy 
'Afoftles  no  other  than  Blueing  at  you  their 
filch  Unholy  Succeffours. 

I  mail  conclude  this  Paragraph  with  that 
ftrange  Prayer  of  a  Trot  eft  ant  Divine  upon 
his  Reading  a  Gaz,et,  who  there  found,  how 
in  rhe  Vacancy  of  the  Roman  See,  fome 
Cardinals  were  confulting,  that  the  next 
jPope  when  Created,  mould  be  bound  to 
difcard  his  Nephews,  thofe  Stickers  of  the 
Churches  Treafure.  He  Zealoufly  Ejaculated 
this  mor,  but  pithy,  Petition,  faying,  [God 
Almighty  Remove  the/e  good  Thoughts  out  of 
the  Minds  ofthefe  Cardinals,  for  the  Scandal 
pf  their  Church  ,  are  the  F^dific  alien  of  curs, 
and  Difturhances  amongfr  them,  gives  a 
Sweet  Repofe  to  US  :  Hiftory  of 'Cardinal /, 
pag.  132. 

Suitable  to  that  before,  is  this,  that  which 
followeth  after.  Another  Divine  Difcourfing 
with  Cardinal-  Odefchalcho's  Chaplain,  and 
asking  him  what  he  was.,  he  Anfwered,  I] 


of  this  prefent  Pope-  of  Rome.       4 1 

a  Priejt,  and  pray  you,  laith  the  Mirii- 
fter,  what  is  your  Mailer  whom  you  Serve, 
Oh  Sir  (quoth  he)  'tis  my  Lord  Cardinal'. 
Go  to  then,  laid  the  Enquirer,  pray  what 
is  your  Work  ?  Oh  Sir  (  faith  he  )  I  Say 
Service  in  my  Lords  Chap  pel ;  Say  Service, 
(iaith  the  other  )  then  you  are  not  16  good 
as  an  Horfe  or  an  A$e,  for  both  thele  dumb 
Creatures  dse  Service,  and  doing  Service  is 
better  than  Saying  Service :  but  the  Dilcourfe 
ended  not  here,  the  Opponent,  a  little  too 
Pragmatical.,  mtift.  ask  lome  more  Qtiefti- 
ons,    being  too  much  Queftion-fick,  fur 
ther,  faying,  I  pray  you  Sir,  who  gave  to 
you  the  Name  of  'Prieft,   and  to  your  Ma 
iler  the  Name  of  Lord  Cardinal,   feeing  St. 
"Paul  Names  no   fuch  Offices  among  the 
Officers  of  the  True  Church  ?  Ephef.  4.  1 1 . 
The  Refpondent  Reply s,    Oh  Sir,    Our  Holy 
Muthzr  the  Church  gave  to  me  the  Name  of 
Trieft,  and  to  my  Matter  the  Name  of  Car- 
dmal.     Upon  this,  the  ^uefiionift  makes  this 
brisk  Repartee,    laying ,  f  God  Almighty 
Blelsme  with  my  Fathers  Name,  for  all  that 
Bear  only  their  Mothers  Name,    (  as  you 
fay,  Ton  and  your  Lord  do  )   be  no  better 
than  Baftards,    or  if  you  will  have  it  in  a 
cleaner  Drefs,  that  is  to  lay,-   the  Popes  Ne 
phews :   But  enougiv  of  this  Facetious  Dif- 


courfe. 


41  The  Notorious  Life 

Now  'tis  High  time  to  take  a  more  par 
ticular  View  of  our  oJefchalcho,  whom  we 
have  Characterized  but  little  as  a  Cardinal 
hitherto,  feeing  our  main  <Def5gn  is,  to 
give  him  a  more  Ample  Character  as  Pope , 
where  the  Myftery  of  Iniquity  mult  be  more 
fully  opened  in  a  large  Field  of  Dil- 
courie. 

As  John  the  Divine  gives  a  Graphical 
Defcription  of  the  Picture  of  his  Double 
Bcaft  in  general ;  how  He  gradually  Rofe, 
both  out  of  the  Earth,  and  out  of  the  Sea, 
Revel.  13.1,11.  So  my  prefent  Task  is  to 
Limn  to  the  Life  the  very  Perfon  of  this 
prefent  Scarlet  Colour  A  Beaft,  the  pope  in  par 
ticular,  (hewing,  Firft,  How  he  rofe  up 
Step  by  Step  to  the  Pontifical  Chair,  into 
which  this  our  Cardinal  Oilefcbakho  was 
Ufher'd  with  abundance  of  Pompous  and 
Solemn  Ceremonies :  'Tis  indeed  an  nfual 
•Saying,  That  Ctremonies  are  but  Indifferent 
things ;  yet  this  is  a  moft  certain  and  Try- 
ed  Truth,  (  to  the  great  Detriment  of  ma 
ny,  much  Damnified  hereby  )  that  though 
Ctrewwtes  be  in  truth  but  things  Iridifftrent 
to  Salvation ,  yet  Experience  ( the  belt 
.School-Miitrefs  )  Teacheth,  they  are  things 
Necejfary  to  Preferment.  None  can  Climb 
up  (  not  Jacob's,  but)  Jlnticbrifis  Ladder, 
li\Qftich  as  have  the  C/;f^r//Confcience  of 


of  this  prefent  Pope  of  Rome.      43 

a  Latitudintirian,  who  can  ft  retch  our  and 
Gape  wide  as  the  Greedy-gut  once  J:  j, 
(in  his  Eating  a  Fifh  Dinner  )  who  fv; al 
lowed  down  Bones  and  all,  till  he  had  like 
to  have  been  Choaked  :  We  muft  fuppofe 
our  oJefcbalcbo  had  a  Throat  wide  enough, 
he  was  not  at  all  (b  Scrupulous  as  the  precife 
Ones  among  us,  but  could  Gulp  down  any 
Romifo  Ceremony  (though  never  lb  Corrupt 
and  Unfcriptural  )  provided  it  might  but 
give  him  an  Hearty  Lift  into  the  Seat  of  In 
fallibility  :  'Tis  as  much  beyond  Queition- 
ing,  as  the  molt  Received  Maxim  in  Phylo- 
lophy,  That  fuch  as  are  molt  Defe&ive  in 
their  Morals,  are  molt  Zealous  to  fupply 
it  with  abundance  of  Ceremonials  :  How  far 
this  our  Odefcbalcfo  was  Defcient  in  Mora 
lity,  let  the  Author  of  the  Scarlet  Gown 
(  his  own  Countrey-man,  the  Italian  )  be 
heard  to  (peak  ,  His  Relation  Runs  thus,, 
Benedetto  Odefcbalcbo  was  a  very  Rich  Pre 
late,  who  a  long  time  Courted  Den  Rarbe- 
rino  for  preferring  him  to  be  Clerk  of  the 
Chamber,  which  place  he  was  Ambitious  of, 
(  that  he  might  be  the  better  Acquainted 
with  all  the  Grand  Intrigues  of  the  Confi- 
ftoiy  )  and  which  the  Don  had  promiled 
him  upon  his  paying  down  upon  the  Nail 
a  Round  Sum  of  Money  for  it :  But  find 
ing  that  his  Purchafe  proved  nothing,  lave 

only 


44  ?h*  Notorious  Life 

only  a  company  of  Court  Complements, 
and  that  this  Crooked-back  Don  Antonio  dealt 
but  Crookedly  with  him,  in  making  the  Fool 
fain  with  Fair  Words  without  Deeds,    he 
(  being  weary'd  with  a  little  fprinkling  of 
Court  Holy  Water  only,  )    began  to  think 
of  the  Proverb  too  late,    That  a  Fool  and 
his  Money  is  focn  farted  :   He  hereupon  Re- 
fblves  to  take  new  Meafures,    and  to  try 
whether    ( a  gain  ft ,     and  to  Confute  all 
Grawer  Rules, )  the  Feminine  Gender  might 
not  prove  more  Worthy  than  the  JMafctiline, 
and  whether  the  Gray-Mare  might  not  prove 
the  better  Horfe ;  -  fo  makes  he  his  Appljca- 
tion  to  that  Famous  Strumpet,   that  Impe 
rious  Je^abel,    Sifter  in  Law?  d^c.  to  Pope 
Innocent  the  Tenth,  Den  Olymfia,  wherein  'tis 
Remarkable,  that  he  deals  in  both  with  the 
Dons,   and  with  the  Greateft"  Dons  too,   the 
one  an  Ambitious,    and  (  as  to  the  Court 
Faction  in  Rome  )'  a  very  Potent  Cardinal ; 
but  the  other  (  when  he  fhifts  his  Sails  unto. 
and  makes  his  Second  (hift  )    was  no  lefs 
than  an  Omnipotent  Creatrefs ;     for  fhe 
could  Create  what  Cardinals  and  what  Pepes 
fhe  pleafed,   with  her  Irrefiftible  Charms  ; 
No  wonder  then,  if,  when  at  a  lofs,  he  falls 
upon  this  new  Expedient,   and  Turns  Den 
Antonio  into  Don  Olympia  ,    yea  Turns  from 
the  former  to  the  latter  ,   as  being  better 

furnifhed 


Et  Jt  qua  latent,  Mdiora  ?;itat,  Ovid. 

Was  not  this  a  Brisk  Madam  ,  and  well 
worth  a  Prelate,  yea  a  Cardinals  Court 
ing  :  The  Subirance  of  this  Account , 
(  though  here  drefs'd  up  in  other  Lan 
guage  )  may  be  feen  in  the  Scarlet  Gcu'n 
Author,  pag.  21.  who  fays  further,  That 
tliis  Benedetto  Prefented  this  Lady  with  Rich 
Love-Tokens,  wherewith  at  length  he  Got 

into  Her Favor  :    But  above  all  ( faith 

the  faid  Italian  )  with  One  Amourous  Bribe 
more  than  Ordinary,  and  molt  to  be  Re 
marked  ;  which  matter  (  as  that  Author 
Relates  it  )  was  manag'd  after  this  manner, 
Our  Qdefchalcho,  going  one  Day  fas  he  did 
often  )  to  pay  his  Relpects  to  this  his  Lady 
Don  0/p?p/£,  about  die  Coronation  of  her 
Brother  in  Law  Tope  Innocent  the  Tenth,  a 
Goldfmith  came  at  that  very  time ,  and 
fhewed  Her  a  very  fair  Cupboard  of  Rich 
and  Modifli  Plate  to  Sell  ,  and  perhaps 
prompting  the  Lady  to  Buy  it,  as  con 
ducing 


^  6  The  Notorious  Life 

ducing  much  to  the  Grace  and  Honour  of 
that  Great  Days  Solemnity  :  Qlympia 
Vieweth  it  thorough  and  thorough  in  the 
pretence  of  this  Qdefchakbo  (  Her  Para 
mour  )  and  other  Lords,  and  no  doubt 
had  more  than  a  Months  Mind  to  it,  but 
how  to  compafs  it  without  her  own  Coft 
and  Coin,  was  her  prefent  Projeft,  in  or 
der  to  this,  She  firft  highly  commends  eve 
ry  Vefiel  by  it  felf,  both  Mettal,  Workman- 
fhip  and  Luftre,  and  then  all  in  the  whole, 
faying,  It  was  a  goodly  and  curious  Cup 
board  of  the  New  Fafliion'd  Plate,  but  (he 
xvas  a  Poor  Widow  (  (he  mould  have  faid,  a 
Rich  Harlot  )  fb  pretending  fhe  was  not 
able  to  Purchafe  it ;  laftly,  upon  this  (he 
withdraws  immediately  to  her  Chamber, 
leaving  the  By-ftander  OJefihalcko  (  who 
admired  all  for  her  fake  )  to  make  out  fome 
better  proof  (than  yet  he  had  done  in  all 
his  former  Gifts  )  of  his  Cordial  Alfedions 
to  Her.  This  Prelate ,  being  but  (  as  the 
fame  Author  calls  him  )  a  Man  of  mean 
Undemanding,  was  the  more  eafily  Infnared 
with  the  wily  Wit  of  a  Woman,  which,  at 
a  pinch ,  doth  ulually  exceed  that  of  a 
Man  (  who  Requires  more  Deliberation  ) 
even  of  fiich  as  have  deeper  Reaches  and 
Capacities  than  our  fhallow  Odefchalcho : 
Hereupon,  under  this  fuddain  Surprize,  he 

calls 


of  this  prefent  Pope  of  Rome.      47 

calls  the  Goldfmith  to  him,  Asks  the  Price  of 
the  Plate,  'twas  below  his  Honour  in  his 
Amorous  Expectations  to  bid  him  lower 
than  was  Asked,  he  paid  down  Eight  Thou- 
fand  Crowns  for  it,  and  without  more  Adoe, 
lent  it  in  to  the  Lady  ,  as  a  Prefent  from 
Him,  to  her  in  her  Chamber,  that  this  Gift 
(  as  Sohm&n  faith  )  might  make  Room  for 
himfelf  thither  alfo  :  Don  Olympia  was  fb 
Tranfported  (both  with  the  Succefs  of  her 
Craft,  and  with  the  Pofleflion  of  fb  much 
Plate,  all  coiling  her  Nothing,  fave  only 
Carting  a  Figure  about  a  Credulous  Fool, ) 
that  Immediately  (he  went  to  the  Pope 
where  flie  was  Domina,  Fe,c  totum,  and  whe 
ther  fhe  had  free  Accefs  Night  and  Day, 
See  Scarlet  Gown,  pag.  Si.  at  the  bottom,  ) 
Begs  of  him  for  OJffcotldb,  not  only  the 
Clerkfliip  in  the  Chamber,  but  fbon  after  a 
Scarlet  Goivn  alfb  .  How  far  this  She-Don 
Help'd  him  with  her  Hand  (  if  not  in  Per- 
fbn,  yet  by  Proxy  )  into  Peters  Chair,  I 
know  not,  'tis  enough  to  know  here  that 
QJefcbalcbtfs  Familiar  Converfe  with  this 
Famous  Woman  ,  but  Infamous  Whore , 
gives  Ground  enough  to  beleive,  that  He 
was  Defective  in  Morals,  and  therefore  was 
under  a  Neceflity  to  Eeek  that  out  with  Ce 
remonials  :  No  wonder  then,  if  fuch  a  Man 
of  Immorality  (hotild  become  fas  it  were  )  a 

very 


'48  The  Notorious  Life 

very  Compound  of  Ceremony  :  His  Election 
to  the  Chair  confifted  of  Ceremony ;  his  Coro 
nation  in  the  Chair  confifted  of  Ceremony  ; 
but  above  all,  his  whole  Worfhip  and  De 
votion  in  the  matters  of  Religion  confifteth  of 
Ceremony  ;  only  a  Word  or  Two  as  a  By-, 
blow  upon  this  laft ,  it  being  befide  the 
Scope  of  our  prefent  Defign.  This  prefent 
Popes  Worfhip  is  drawn  forth  in  fuch  an 
4ntick  and  PedanttckDrefs,  fb  far  from  the 
Simplicity  of  the  Gofpel,  that  no  thinking 
Mind  can  look  upon  Popery  to  beany  better 
than  Foppery,,  Hire  I  am,  the  'Rom'ijli Church 
is  far  pair,  her  Meridian  ,  feeing  fhe  can 
fcarce  be  now  feen  for  the  length  of  her 
own  Shadow,  tiS&^batloQVs  of  her  Evening 
are  ftretched  out,  in  turning  Doctrine  into 
Sopbifiry,  and  Dijdpline  into  Ceremony,  and' 
though  the  I-Jed%  of  her  Ceremonies  may  fa 
vourably  protett  Carricn-Cr ows  ,  yet  is  it 
pricking  and  Vexatious  enough  to  harmless 
Doves. 

But  to  Wave  that  in  this  place,  and' come 
to  that  Compound  of  Ceremonies,  manag'd 
by  a  Maffer  of  Ceremonies,  at  the  Eleftion 
of  this  prefent  Tcpe :  No  fooner  was  his 
Pred'eceiibr,  Peps  Clement  the  Tenth  Dead, 
(  for  though  the' Keys  of  Heaven,  Hell  and 
Purgatory,  hang  at  the  Popes  Girdle,  yet 
there's  the  Mifchief.  the  Key  of  the  Grave' 

Was 


of  this  prefent  Pope  of  Rome.      49 

was  by  fome  Mifhap  or  other  drop'd  from 
it,  otherwise  the  Pope  had  been  equally  as 
Immortal  as  Infallible,  )   but  the  Congregati 
on  of  Cardinals  Y  having  Nine  Mornings 
after  bis  Death  Sung  Dirges  for  the  Repofe 
of  his  Soul,  and  preparing  themlelves  with 
rioly  Water,  Incenfe,  &c.  )  did  all  Repair 
to  the  Conclave,    and  with  them  Two  Ma 
ters  of  Ceremonies,    and  the  Secratary  of 
the  College,  &c. .  were  all  clofe  ftuit  up  to 
gether  ,    in  order  to  Eleft  a   New  Pope  : 
Then  Proceflions  came  Thick  and  Three 
fold  from  all  Churches  and  Monafteries  , 
Singing,    [  Vtnl  Creator  ,    &c.    Come  Holy 
Ghoft,  &c.  ~]    Round  about  the  Conliftory,' 
Imploring  the  Inipirations  of  the  Spirit  to 
come  upon  the  Cardinals :  The  n'rft  Step  or 
Ceremony,   was,    The  Three  chief  Cardi 
nals  of  the  feveral  Orders,  with  the  Cardi 
nal-Chamberlain,  took  an  Exacft  Survey  of 
all  the  parts  of  the  Conclave  to  fee  that  all 
be  clo(e,    and  fhut  up  on  all  fides,    as  if 
they  would  (hut  out  the  'Holy  Ghoit  from 
coming  among  them  ;   for  upon  the  Death 
of  Pope  Clement  the  Fourth,  when  the  Con- 
Clave  could  not  agree   (  being  divided  and 
Rent  in  pieces  by  the  Feuds  and  Factions  of 
the  French  and  Spanijb  Intereft )   about,  the 
Election  of  a  Succellbr,    one  of  the  Cardi 
nals   (  perhaps  fuppoiing  that  they  were 

'.'  too 


50  The  Notorious  Life 

too  dole  (hut  up  in  the  Conclave,  )  Cryed, 
Ton  muft  Order  the  Uncovering  of  the  Roof  of 
the  Canfiftory,  to  make  way  for  the  Hdy  (jh;ft 
to  come  down  upon  us :  The  Conclave  puts  lo 
much  ftrels  upon  this  feme  Ctrewonj,  that 
not  ftriftly  to  oblerve  it,  is  a  Nullity  of  the 
Election. 

The  Secmd  Ceremony  at  the  Election  of 
this  Pope,  was,  The  Matter  of  the  Cere 
monies,  (  after  a  Recital  of  the  Cardi 
nals  Priviledges,  which  each  Swore  to  Ob- 
ferve,  in  cafe  he  were  cholen  Pope,  )  Rings 
a  Bell  and  calls  them  all  to  Mais,  at  which 
they  Sang  the  Hymn,  [  Veni  Creator  Spiri- 
tus,  ]  and  the  Prayer  of  the  Holy  Ghoft, 
to  Implore  His  Illumination  upon  them  : 
But  I  am  afraid  they  could  not  find  one 
Promife  to  ground  their  Trayer  upon,  for 
the  promile  of  the  Spirits  coming  is  only  to 
thole  that  Seek  him  in  Spirit  and  in  Truth, 
and  that  are  found  in  Due  Order,  and  not 
in  fuch  Dilorders  as  Ufually  attend  the  Con 
clave,  which  once  gave  occalion  to  an  Old 
Cardinal  of  Sicily,  (who,  after  long  Ab- 
fence ,  coming  to  a  Popes  Eledion  ,  and 
finding  nothing  but  Animofides,  Factions 
and  Fractions  among  them,  )  to  complain, 
faying,  Ntttn  ad  Hunc  Aiodum  frmt  fonti/ices 
Ronumi?  &c  I  ex  peeled  that  fervent 
as  in  Times  of  Old,  mould  have 
procured 


of  this  prefent  Pope  of  Rome. 

procured  fome  fit  Man  to  be  pointed 
by  the  Holy  Ghoft  to  us  for  a  Vicar  r/~ 
Cbrift,  but  (  faith  he  )  If  promifmg  Re- 
xvards  for  Penfionary  Votes3  If  Cajoling* 
Curfing  and  Threatning  Revenge  b  ?  your 
tvay  of  Canvafing  your  Elections ,  then 
farwel  for  me,  and  fo  the  good  old  Man 
Returned  Home  to  his  Countrey  ,  and 
could  never  be  perfwaded  to  fee  Rome  any 
more. 

The  Third  Ceremony.,   was,   To  Elect  a 
Pope  by  Scrutiny,  (  waving  the  Two  other 
ways  of  Infpiration  or  Comyromife,  )    which 
they  thus  managed,    Each  Cardinal  hath  a 
Lift  of  all  the  Cardinals  Names  given  to 
him,  he  Wrote  down  in  a  peice  of  Paper, 
whom  he  would  have  cholen,   went  to  the 
Altar,    puts  his  Scroll  into  the  Golden  Cha 
lice  (landing  thereupon,  and  fb  Return'd  to 
his  place,    when  all  had  fb  done,    the  Prime 
Bijhop  took  out  all  the  Papers,  delivered 
rhem  to  the  Prime  Deacon,    who  unfolded 
them  all,    and  without  mentioning  the  Ele- 
ttor.  Read  aloud  the  Names  of  the  ULlefted  : 
The   Prime  Yriejt  Reckoning  the  Voices  , 
Pronounced  the  Majority  of  Votes  to  fall 
.ipon  Cardinal  OJefcbalcbo  :  Hereupon  he 
ilang  a  5ilver  Bell,  and  a  Pan  of  Coals  was 
brought  in,  and  all  the  Pa  per  Billets,  where- 
n  the  Names  of  all  the  Cardinals  were 
Written,  were  Burnt.  F  Coed 


5 1  The  Notorious  Life 

Coed  God,  How  far  the  Ancient  Chureh 
of  Rome  is  now  Run  from  the  Primitive 
Pattern  ?  How  far  is  that  Church  at  this 
Day  Run  a  Whoring •?  more  like  Eabylons 
Whore,  than  Sions  Spovfe,  who  both  Ask'd 
and  Received  Directions  from  the  Blelled 
Bridegroom  ,•  how  (he  might  follow  the 
Footfteps  ofChrifts  (  not ^ntiehrifts)  Flock: 
I  would  gladly  Ask  of  any  Man,  how  ma 
ny  of  tfaefe  (  and  many  more,  for  Brevity, 
omitted  )  filly  Afifi  as  well  as  Poptfl)  Tricks 
and  Trinkets f  were  put  into  pradice  at  the 
Election  of  St.  Matthias  into  Traiterous  JH- 
tlas's  tiijboprick  and  dpojMeflrip,  Aft.  I.  20.  to 
x6.  The  pure  Simplicity  of  that  Primitive 
Ordination  makes  OUF  Pope  Innocent  the 
Eleventh  look  more  like  an  Unholy  Jtpoftate, 
than  any  Holy  ^pofrle,  whole  SitcceJJor  he 
yet  prei times  to  be  Reckoned,  who  in  Truth 
is  rather  a  Sueceffor  of  Judas  in  betraying 
Cbrijt,  as  he  is  the  Anuchri(ty  than  any  of 
the  Holy  ^pojfles,  who  were  fervent  foltow- 
ers  of  the  Sacred  Footfteps  of  their  Sweet 
Saviour,  and  who  Commands  us  to  follow 
them  no  'farther  ,  than  t/xy  follow  Carijfi 
i  Cor.  ii.  i.  1'hey  make  that  Holy  Child 
Je fits  the  Regula  Regnlans,  or  Rule  Ruling, 
and  themfefves  only  the  Regula  Regulate, 
fhe  Rule  Ruled,  they  wonld  not  have  us  to 
ibllow  the  Dark  Side  ©f  the  cloud  of  Wit-' 

neflesy 


of  tits  prefect  Pope  of  Rome.      5*  j 

nefies,  as  the  ^gyftians  did  ,  and  were 
Drowned,  but  the"  White-fide  thereof,  aS 
the  Israelites  did,  and  were  .Saved.  Nei 
ther  do  we  ever  lind  that  St.  Peter  pafs'd 
under  thofe  Corhick  and  Theatrical  Cere 
monies  when  called  to  his  Apoftlefhip,  or 
ever  fb  Prefer'd  or  EnrichM  any  of  his  Ne- 
f  Ire-Ms  or  Baftardsi  as  the  Peps  (  his  pre 
tended  Succ;eifor  )  doth  now. 

The  Fourth  Ceremony  Wherewith  this  pre- 
fent  Pope  had  his  Pompous  Inauguration  at 
his  Election,  was,  Still  more  like  Apojtati- 
cal,  than  Jpo/lolicalj  to  wit,  No  (boner  was* 
the  Majority  of  Votes  (  even  Two  parts  of 
Three  )  acknowledged  to  fall  upon  our 
Cardinal  Odefcbahho,  through  the  Almighty 
Influence  of  his  Old  Grateful  as  well  as 
Humble  Servant,  Don  Olym^ia,  who  could 
riot,  with  either  tionour  or  Advantage,  fb 
fbon  forget  her  Stately  Cupboard  of  curi 
ous  Silver  Plate,  well  knowing,  her  lafting 
Gratitude  to  Him  would  be  a"n  Encourage^ 
ment  to  others  in  that  Court,  to  make  their 
Addrefles  in  the  lame  manner  to  Her.  No 
fooner  (  I  fay  )  was  this  Odefchalcho  owned 
to  be  the  Peps  Elctt  Dtiely,  though  never  id 
Fattioufly  and  Surreptittoufly ;  but  pre- 
frritly  the  Wicket,  or  rather  Wicked  Hole 
(  wellcaird  the  Goltlen  Door,  through  which 
the  Hungry  Cardinals  Receive  all  their 
F  2 


54  Ihe  Notorious  Life 

Meat,   as  well  as  ^/r,' during  their,  fome- 
times,    long  Confinement,)  was  then  bro 
ken  open,    at  which  ftood  an  Infinite  Num 
ber  of.  Poor  People,   on  .whom  this  New 
Pope  bellowed  his  Papal  Benediftion,   and 
to  whom  He  Remitted  all. their  Sins .     The 
Formality  of  opening  this  Gclden  Door,  was 
thus  Oblerved,   This  New  Pope  came  with 
a  Gclden  Mallet  in  his  Hand    (  all  He  med 
dles  now  with  mtift  be  Gold,  J  His  Silver 
Are  is  now  turned  into  a  Golden  One,    his 
Silver  Cupboard  of  Plate  before  purchaled, 
is  now  turned  into  a  Golden  Door,   and  into 
a  Golden  Mallet,   yea,   better  than  all  this. 
Here  was,    by  Vertue  of:  the  Philofophers 
Stone,  a  Silver,  or  rather  a  Leaden,  or  Cop 
per  Cardinal    (  as  Odefckalcho  fignifies  )  into 
a  more  Illuftrious  and  Golden  Pope.    With 
this  Golden  Mallet  he  ftrikcs  at  the  Goldtn 
Door,  which  while  He  was  in  Doing,    there 
were  Workmen  Ordered  without  to  Break 
it  open,    which  done,    all  the  Chips,  Stones, 
Duft  and  Dirt ,    ( that  fell  from  this  Golden 
Gate,  while  it  was  in  opening, )  are  gather 
ed  up,    and  preferved  as  the  choiceft  and 
moft  Inestimable  Relicks ;   and  as  to  the 
Golden  Mallet  which  this  New  Pope  held  in 
his  Hand,    He  Nobly  gave  to  Cardinal  Sfor- 
Ka  (according  to  Cnltom  )    who  was  his 
great  Crony  and  Correspondent,   ofteneft 

in 


of  this  prefect  Pope  of  Rome.      5"  5 

in  his  Company,  and  efpecially  in  moft 
Grace  and  Favour  with  him,  for  Lending 
him  fuch  an  effectual  Lift  into  Peters  Chair '. 
Now  let  any  Man  of  a  Sober  Mind  Judg, 
what  kind  of  Succefibr  this  prefent  _Pope  is 
to  Poor  Peter  in  his  Chair  ;  the  Apoffle  Peter 
faith  of  himfelf,  [  Silver  and  Gold  have  I 
none,']  Act.  3.  6.  But  this  Pope  (  his  pre 
tended  Succefibr  )  hath  Silver  for  himfelf, 
and  for  his  Olympia  too,  yea,  and  a  Golden 
Mallet  to  give  away,  &c.  Simon  Peter  Re 
jected  Simon  Magus,  when  he  would  have 
Hired  of  him  the  Gift  of  Miracles,  Afts  8. 
19,  20,  23.  whereas  this  Pope  will  do  no 
thing  without  Ready  Money.  St.  Peter  paid 
his  Tribute  to  Temporal  Princes,  even  at 
his  Lord  Chrifts  Command,  both  for  himfelf 
and  for  his  Mafter,  Manh.  17.  24.  to  the 
laft  ;  But  this  Pope  (  being  Antichrijt  ) 
Scorns  any  fuch  Difgraceful  Motion,  No, 
'tis  below  his  Unholy  Highnefs  to  pay  One 
Penny;  he  Received  not  deters  Patrimony 
upon  any  fuch  Ignoble  Terms .-  The  Law  of 
the  Land,  faith,  That  a  Mam  Heir  is  Ob 
liged  to  pay  the  Debts,  and  to  perform  the  Du 
nes  of  the  Inheritance,  otherwife  the  Heir  is 
Difmherited,  and^he  Inheritance  Divided 
among  the  Creditors :  But  the  Popes  Ca 
non-Law  faith ,  Peters  Keys  of  Authority, 
with  all  the  Profits  and  Emoluments,  belong 
F  to 


f  6  The  Notoricus  Life 

to  the  Tope ,  who  holds  them  faft  in  his 
Hand  ;  but  as  to  his  Key  of  Doctrine,  where 
in  He  Taught  Univeriai  Subjection  to  Secu 
lar  Governpurs,  is  a  Duty  no  way  Incum- 
1  ent  upon  Htm;  thele  are  great  Incurs 
I  ranees  to  Popes,  and  would  be  unfuppoiv 
table  Burdens  to  our  Sacred  Inheritance  : 
let  in  this  the  Pope  likes  well  enough  to 
Imitate  his  Predecelior  Peter  in,  He  dearly 
loves  to  Catch  with  his  Angling  Rod  fiich 
Fifties  in  his  Sea  or  See,  as  have  a  peice  of 
Silver  in  their  Mouths,  Matth.l'j.  2J.  and 
it  will  do  no  Harm,if  now  and  then  a  peice  of 
Gold  be  found  there  alib  ,  for  then  will  he  he 
furnifh'd  with  Materials,not  only  fora  Silver 
Cupboard  of  Plate,  but  likewife  for  making 
his  Golden  Doors,  and  his  Golden  Mallets. 

Tl  e  Fifth  Ceremony  mould  have  been, 
When  the  Goldtn  Door  was  opened ,  He 
ihould  have  proceeded  tq  the  Ycrfiiry 
Chair,  the  Chair  of  EyplGrpttGn,  where  the 
Youngeit  Cardinal-Deacon  ihould  have  Ex 
amine  d  Things  and  ihings.  l;ut  this  Cu- 
itomary  Ceremony  is  now  a  Days  Anti- 
q inted  as  Superfluous  and  Unneceliary, 
iince  commonly  thole  Popes  that  have  been 
lately  Elected,  had  given  iiilricient  procf 
by  their  Baftards  of  theif  Virility,  and  thi;t 
rliey  were  known  beforehand  to  be  of  the 
Ki£l:t  Ma' culm  Gencttr  ,  and  indeed  1  tliiiik 

it 


of  this  prefent  Tope  of  Rome.       5  7 

lt  need  not  be  much  Doubted,  -but  rather 
than  fail,  rather  than  this  Pope  mould  have 
this  trouble  given  him,  Don  Olympia  her 
(elf  might  have  come  in  with  her  1  eltimo- 
ny,  and  have  allured  them  Viva,  Vcce,  they 
might  undoubtedly  (pare  the  Labor  of  Ex 
ploration,  for  (he  hath  had  fbme  Experi 
mental  Knowledg  (  which  is  the  Beft  )  of 
-his  Manhood  and  Gallantry.  And  now , 
when  I  think  of  it,  I  cannot  but  Imagine 
this  Groping  Chair  a  very  ill  advifed  Injun 
ction  ,  however  upon  this  Account ,  That 
whereas  the  Rowanifts  do  ufually  Stile  their 
Head,  The  Lord  God  their  Pope,  now  if  as 
they  fay,  He  be  indeed  a  God,  they  do 
but  Debafe  him  ( if  not  Ungod  him  )  in 
Trying  whether  be  be  a  Man  :  Methinks 
the  Words  of  Chri/t,  with  but  a  little  Vari 
ation,  might  ferve  the  pretended  Vicar  of 
Cbnft  :  as  the  Lord  did  Evidence  the  Truth 
of  his  Reliirredion,  by  faying,  [  If  I  be  a 
Spirit,  Iflwttld  not  have  Flefh  and  Bc»es,~]  Luke 
24.  3  9.  So  this  Vicar  might  give  a  Repulfe  to 
Iris  Gropers,by  laying,f  If  I  he  a  GodJ  flwuldnot 
hweAfanly Members.]  [here  is  only  this  Ditfe- 
rince,ChHft  was  willing  to  beHandled,but  his 
Vicar  \s  unwilling,  unleis  by  Olympia,  there,- 
tore  this  Rude  Ceremony  was  Omitted. 

But  the  Sixth  Ceremony  (and  (6  many  there 

nuilt  be  to  comport  kill  with  the  number 

F  4  of 


5  3  The  Notorious  Life 

of  the  name  of  the  Beaft,  666.)  is  a  Cere- 
•moriy  of  Ceremonies,  So  it  fupplies  the  late 
omiffion  of  the f fib  by  way  of  Redundancy: 
for  this  introduced!  all  the  Splendour  and 
Grandeur  of  his  prime  Trocejjion,  Confecra- 
tion,Ctrcrjaticn,&:c.  (i)His  firit  Prccejfionafter 
his  Election  was  thus  pompoufly  managed: 
tms  great  Man,  or  rather,  tins  great  God  was 
mounted  upon  Mens  (houlders  in  the  moft 
fplended  Equipage  imaginable,  fuch  as  50/c- 
mon  in  all  his  Glory  'was  never  Araye d^with 
(for  you  muft  fuppoie  this  Pope  to  be  the 
goodly  Lilly,  or  rather  the  glorious  and 
gawdy  Tulip,  that  our  Lord  fpeaks  of 
Matt.  6.  28,  29-j  However  fuch  as  neither 
CbriA  himfelf  (who  was  greater  than  Solomon, 
Matt.  12.  42. )  nor  much  lefs  his'Apoftle 
Teter  fwhofe  Succefibur  this  Pope  pretends 
to  be)  ever  took  upon  them  the  like  pro 
digal  and  pompious  Grandeur.  This  Pope 
iras  now  Arayed  in  Scarlet  Robes,  Furr'd  with 
Ermines  quite  through,  and  Adorned  with  the 
Richeft  Gold  and  Silver  Laces,  there  was  pla 
ced  upon  his  Head  a  moft  glittering  and  glori 
ous  Tripple  Crown  of  Gold,  and  a  moft  Rich 
Collar  of  Gold  all  curioufly  Enameld  with  the 
choiceft  Jewels  and  chiefeft  precious  Stones  : 
there  were  put  into  his  Hands  two  Golden  Keys 
^pretended  to  be  the  lame,  that  Chrift  gave 
to  Peter,  and  that  'peter  at  his  Death  be 
queathed 


of  this  prefent  Pope  of  Rome.       c  - 

queathed  to  the  Popes  fucceffively)  wkicB  *??,. 
or  opening  and  putting  the  Gates  of  H.. 
'a  place  where  Himfelf  is  never  like  tb 
come)  for  whom  he  pleafeth  :  and  over  hii 
Head  was  carried  a  moft  ftatcly  Canopy  with 
lofty ,  flying,  and  mofr  gawdy  Streamers,  and 
He  Hirnfelf  under  it  molt  Trim,  with  his 
Artificial  Locks  finely  curl'd  and  powdef'd 
with  a  Vaft  Tower  or  Fruz  upon  his  Fore- 
lead  (in  the  very  Drefs  of  the  Myftical 
Whore}  and  in  all  this  Antick  Drels  and  Pe- 
dantick  Pageantry,  this  Pope  was  preferred 
to  the  people,  who  ( together  with  his  Page) 
made  thereupon  loud  Acclamations :  \Vvue 
le  Pa  fa,  Vive  It  Papa']  all  along  as  He  made 
lis  Progrefs  to  Peters  Chair :  mark  here, 
while  this  Apocalyptick  Beaft  was  thus  moun 
ted  upon  Mens  moulders,  He  was  then  car 
ried  like  a  Conqnerour,  who  had  now  made 
a  compleat  Conqueft  over  the  whole  Con 
clave  of  his  Fellow-Cardinals,  and  new  had 
ftotitly  Stormed  fin  defpight  of  all  fraud 
and  force,  yea,  of  Fate  it  .(elf)  the  ponri- 
;fkal  Chair,  and  in  this  pofture  He  was  not 
onely  like  King  Sattl,  who  was  higher  by  the 
Head  and  (ImtUers  than  all  the  People,  but  alfb 
as  a  mighty  Nimrod,  -who  was  to  Trample 
them  all  under  Foot,  His  Feet  ftanding  as 
high  as  their  Heads :  but  the  moft  fignifi- 
cant  Ceremony  in  his  palfage  from  the  Gol 
den 


60  77:e  Notorious  Life 

den  Hatch  .or  Wicket,  to  his  Chair  of  State»> 
was  this,  a  lump  of  Flax  was  carried  before 
Him  Burning ,  whereat  thefe  words  were 
proclaimed. 

— — 5*V  Tr an/it  Gloria  Mundi. 

*Tis  the  Prayer  of  prudent  and  pious  Pror 
teftants,  that  an  happy  Blair  may  deicend 
from  Heaven  to  blow  out  for  ever  all  this 
Antichrittian  Glory  .Even  fo  Amen  &  Amen. 

Thus  was  he  brought  to  his  Chair  of  State, 
which  was  likeivile  covered  with  Scarlet,  all 
richly  Embroidered,  Fringed  round  about 
with  a  Go'd  and  Silver  Silk  Fringe,  and 
gloriotifly  bedeckt  with  Golden  Balls  and 
Croffes,  and  which  was  placed  upon  as  Lofty. 
and  as  Coftly  a  Throne  as  was  that  of  ScL- 
nions,  i  Kings  10.  18.  Thither  was  he 
brougt  upon  Mens  (boulders,  and  when 
gently  taken  down  (for  fear  of  hurting  the 
good  old  MarO  there  was  Htfeated,  there 
was  He  conrecratedy  and  there  was  He  crown-, 
ed,  6Vc.  when  all  this  fokvtmtj  is  accom- 
plifhed,  then  His  Herald  (dreiled  up  in  a 
Garb  comporting  with  the  Pomp )  pro- 
cKiims  by  found  of  Trumpet ,  His  great 
Lord  and  Matter,  to  be  now  [the  King  tf 
Kings,  and  Lord  cf  Lords}  and  as  if  that 
were  not  iiim'ci^nt ,  Ha  had  his  Parafites 

prerjared 


of  this  prefent  Tope  of  Rome.      61 

prepared  to  cry  loud  [God  Elefs  cur  Lord 
d  the  Pope']  Thus  He1,  who  trode  under 
foot  onely  the  People  before ,  mult  now 
trample  upon  the  Neeks  of  Kings  and  EmT 
perours ,  inltance  onely  in  poor  Emperour 
Frederick ,   who  was    confrrained    to    lay 
fprawling  under  the  proud  Popes  Feet ,  on 
whofe  Neck  He  inlolently  trampled  at  lrc- 
nice :  Tis  therefore  one  part  of  this  Pompi- 
pus.  Magniricency,  that  this  Magnifico  hath 
two  Swords  Itanding  ered  by  his  Chair  of 
State  at  his  right  Hand,  to  denote,  that  not 
onely   the  Sword  of  Exc&itmunicaticv  ,  but 
alfo  the  Sword  of  Civil  Dominion  belongs  to 
him  alfo  :  To  lay  nothing  of  the  number  of 
Gawdy  Beads,  Agnus  Deis :    and   abundant 
more  Remiflj  Trumpery  expofed  to  publick 
View,  for  the  better  letting  otf  the  Solem 
nity  of   his  Inauguration:    I  think   'twas 
about  well ,  that,  together  with  his  1  itle 
aforementioned  ,  this  alfo  [  God  of  Gods  J 
was  not  fuperadded,  fo  exalted  Him  above 
the  moft  High  God^  as  well  as  over  all  Lords, 
Kings ,  and  Emperottrs.     The  Reman  Cavon 
and  Ceremonial  Law  commands  the  People, 
to   lay  at  the  ¥cpes  Injlalment  [ih:u  art  our 
God  the  'Pcpe]  and  Pope  Martin.  Could  calm 
ly  and  complaifantly  receive  the  Comple 
ment    of  the   Sicilian  Embailadour  laying 
\jlmtart  the  Lawl?  of  God,  tl?at  takefe  tnpey 

tbe 


£x  The  Notorious  Life 

the  ftnt  of  the  World}  fo  was  this,  but  to  deJ 
clare  to  all  the  World,  that  it  is  He  who  ft  A 
in  the  Temple  of  God,  exalting  Himfelf  above^ 
all  that  is  called  God,  if  not  above  the  true 
God  Himfelf,  the  Pope  daredifpence  with,! 
if  not  difanul  or    contradift  the  Law  oil 
God:   5 n re  I  am,  never  did  any  mortal 
Man  look  more  like  proud  Lucifer  (who  (aid 
ero  ficut  Al'.iffimm,  I  will  be  like,   If  not  a- 
bove,  the  mofr  Htgh,  i(a.  14. 14.  )  than  this 
prefent  proud  Pope  in  his  pontificalibtis  ex- 
pofed  to  View  with  all  thofe  Additional  For 
malities  did  go,  all  which ,  yet  one  more 
muti  Itill  be  added,  to  wit,  the  change  of  his 
Name,  his  old  Name  [pJefchalco  the  Cardi 
nal  muft  be  turned  into  Innocent  the  nth. 
How  Nccent  this  Innocent  was,  the   feqtid 
will  demonftrate.    Yet  follows  he  the  Pat 
tern  of  Bcce*  di  Porco  or  Hog-face,  who  was 
thejfr/  Tope  that  changed  his  Name,  thus 
when  his  Succeflburs  were  Cowards ,  they 
muft  be  called  Leo,  if  he  were  a  Tyrant,cal- 
led  Clement,  if  a   Ru/tick,  Ur banns  though 
never  fiich  a  Turbanus,  or  trouble  World  : 
If  an  Athieft  then  Pious.  So  if  never  16  ob 
noxious,  or  Nccent  then  it  muft  be  Innocent. 
The  Popes  of  thefe  later  Years  have  been  ge 
nerally   (hort  lived,  to  Inftance  onely  in  a 
few  of  the  laft  Edition,  Cardinal  Cbigi  was 
Elefted  Pope,  in  the  year  yy.  April  the 


of  this  prefect  Pope  of  Rome.      63 

7/&,  call'd  kimfelf  Alexander  the  jtb,  one 
troublefome  enough  to  the  Church,  &c. 
He  foon  trips  off  (Whether  from  the  good- 
nefs  of  God  or  his  own  good  Nature,  I  fhall 
not  fay)  gave  up  the  Ghoft,  and  Reilgned 
up  the  Chair  to  Cardinal  Ko/pg/je/,  who 
(iicceeds  him  June  2oth.  by  the  Name  of 
Clement  the  9^,  in  the  Year  67.  The  lofs  of 
Candia  afflicted  him  much  more,  than  the 
\urntng  of  London,  and  haftened  his  Death 
in  the  Year  70.  The  Conclave  being  fhut 
up  above  Four  Months  (a  long  time  to  be 
in  the  Dark,  where  they  made  day  of  Wax 
Handle,  Having  neither  Windows  nor  Holes 
:p  let  in  light)  at  laft  had  fo  much  light  as 
:p  Eled  Cardinal  Altitri,  which  was  the 
bating  Pope  that  Created  our  Cardinal 
ward  (who  is  after  to  be  mentioned)  and 
hen  Dyeth  in  the  Year  76.  having  born 
he  Name  of  Clement  the  Tenth.  So  gives 
3lace  to  our  Cardinal  Odefchalco,  &C.  what 
i  black  Character  they  all  bear  in  the  Hifro* 
y  of  cardinals ,  I  muft  rather  requeft  the 
leader  to  oblerve  it  there  than  to  expecl:  it 
lere ;  especially  of  this  prefent  Pope  Don 
~)lyntfias  grand  Favourite  :  but  above  all,  I 
vender  at  that  Iriflv  Prophet  Malachi 
which  Dr.  Heylin  mentioneth  inhisCofmog. 
aft  Edition  p.  106.)  who  lived  in  the  iif£, 
'entury,  contemporary  with  Bernard,  yet 

undertook 


6.j  The  Notcr/ctis  Life 

undertook  to  give  an  account  of  all 
Popes  from  that  time  to  this  day,  and 
He  doth  by  Symbols  andHierogliphicks,  and 
omitting  all  others,  as  be/kle  our  purpofe 
that  which  is  moft  remarkable,  is  the  cha 
racter,  He  fb  prophetically  Inlpofeth  upon 
this  prefent  Pope  Symbolically,  and  in  an 
Hieroglyphick    Way    plainly    Stiles   Him, 
Pelliia  Infatiabilis,  an  Infat  table  Reafty  I  have 
been  thinking  iince  I  found  it  that  this  Mala- 
chi  the  Iriflj  Prophet  (not  to  meddle  with  his 
other  predictions,  &c.)  hath  Accommoda 
ted  this  character  fb  eongruoufly  to  this 
Gdefchalcoj  as   if  he   had  been  t-he  'Jeiuifo 
Prophet  Adalachi,  vvho  infallibly  had  the  In 
fallible  Spirit ,  What  kind  of  Spirit  ("this  Po- 
pifh  Saint,  a  Ceitertian  Monk,  Arch-Bifhop 
of  Dublin  in  Ireland)  was  endued  with,  is 
not  eaile  to  Determine,  yet  is  there  found 
luch  an   Admirable  Harmony  inter  lignum 
O1-  fariatum,  the  Per  fen  and  the  things  do 
.Symbolize  to  Aftonifhmenc,  as  MfJ/ingbaf&j, 
Stiff &j  &c.  do  obierve. 

Ccnveniunt  Remits  itfdnfina  S^pe  Suit. 

Thar  this  4mftnt  Pope  flionld  be;  pointed 
<nit  (  as  by  the  Finger  )  to  be  an  Insatiable 
Bead,  above  Five  Hundred  Years  before 
i  fc  was  Born,  mult  be  acknowledg'd  Mira-i 


of  this  prefect  Pope  of  Rome.      6$ 

bile  Ditfu;  If  ieveral  of  the  true  Prophets 
of  God  did  (6  TrulyForete]  of  Nebuchadnez,- 
z,ar,  that  He  would  A  rile,  and  become  Gods 
\Battle-Axe  toHew  down  theDegenerate  Ge 
neration  of  the j/Wj,bring  them  to  literal  Ba 
bylon,  keep  them  Captive  there  for  Seventy 
long  Tears,  &c.  And  if  feveral  of  the  True 
AfojtlescfChnjt  did  16  Truly  Foretel  of  An- 
.tichrift,  that  he  would  Arife  out  of  the  Earth 
and  out  of  the  Sea,  and  become  the  Devils 
Patriarch  t"o  tread  down  the  outward  Court 
of  formal  ProfeUpurs,  carry  them  Captive 
to  Myflical  Babylon,  keep  them  in  Captivity 
for  one  thousand  two  Hundred  and  fixty  long 
Tears,  &c.  And  both  theft,  Some  Hundred 
of  Years  before  they  both  came  to  pals : 
Why  may  we  not  call  this  ftrange  Prophet, 
(that  thus  long  before  foretold  of  this  Indi* 
vidual  prefent  Pope,  that  he  would  Arife, 
and  become  an  Invariable  Beaft)  The  Pro 
phet  Mdacl'i  the  Second,  notwithftanding 
he  was  one  of  tteMonkifi  Order,l  cannot  but 
Judg  His  Teltimony  is  therefore  fo  much  the 
ftronger,  fop  'tis  a  received  Maxim  [  fir  mum 
eft  probandi  Genus  cjuod  ttitim  ab  ^d-vcrfflriv 
Siimifur ,  quum  far  it  as  etiatn  ab  Inimicii  Ktr/* 
tat  is  frobari  pcflt']  'tis  t-he  itrongelt  kind  o 
proof,  when  the  very  /><??#;«  cf  the  7 ruth 
are  conftrained  to  bear  \\  itnefs  to  it.  Here 
upon  LiidtvieHs  l/wes  de  Probabilitalis  Info-u 
rn ani  is 


66  The  Notorious  Life 

mentis  faith  thus  \_Amici  contra  Amkum,  & 
Inimici  fro  Inirnico  Invincibile  Teftimoniunt 
erit]  which  in  plain  Englifi  muft  thus  be  «c- ; 
flained.  The  Teftemony  of  a  Papift  againft  ft 
Fapiftj  and  of  a  Papift  for  a  Proteftant  is  a 
Teftimony  without  exception,  and  more  Ift- 
fallible  than  this  Infallible  Pope ,  againffc 
whom  this  Popifti  Monk,  Malachi,  bearetb 
fach  an  undeniable  Teftimony,  though  his 
Friend  as  of  the  feme  Religion  ,  yet  Ho 
nours  He  Him  with  no  better  a  Title ,  than 
that  of  an  Infatiable  Beaft. 

The  whole  Scope  of  all  the  following 
Difcourfe  is  no  other  than  a  Defiant  and 
Comment  upon  that  Black  and  Beaftly  Brand, 
wherewith  this  Irijh  Prophet  (  Monk  Mala- 
cbi  )  Stigmatiz'd  him  with,  fo  many  Hun 
dred  Years  before  He  was  in  Rerum  Natu- 
ra,  or  had  any  Exiftence :  Now  that  He 
hath  been  (b  long  in  his  prefent  Being,  and 
hath  been  Ading  (  like  the  Devils  Patri 
arch  )  his  Devilifh  part  in  the  Tragedy  up 
on  the  Theatre  of  the  World,  ever  fince 
September  the  Twenty-Firp,  in  the  Year  Se 
venty  Six,  whereon  He  was  CcnftcrateJ  and 
Crowned,  &c.  as  above.  Time  is  always 
the  beft  Expofitor  of  the  moft  Abftruce  and 
Obfcure  Prophecies  i  and  what  a  full  and 
perfeft  Exposition  Time  it  (elf  hath  already 
made  (  and  may  hereafter  make  more  ) 

upon- 


of  this  prefect  Pope  of  Rome.      6"^ 

upon  this  very  Text  and  Title  of  this  Irijh 

opb<.t  Malachi,  'concerning  this  Pope,  is 
my  Task  I  have  before  me  to  Demon- 
ftrate. 

Firft,  In  General,  That  this  prefent  Pope 
s  a  Beaft,  is  as  plain,  as  if  Writ  with  a  Beam 
of  the  Sun  upon  a  Wall  of  Marble .  Seeing 
)bth  the  Prcpbet  Daniel ,  and  the  Apoftle 
John,  do  Unanimoufly  call  the  whole  Se 
ries  of  thole  Roman  Popes  no  better  than 

a(ts,  yea,  fuch  Beairs  as  are  beyond 
and  above  all  Names,  as  in  the  Preface. 

Tis  manifeft  enough  even  out  of  their  own 
Authors  (fuch  as  Wrote  the  Lives  of  the 
Popes)  How  that  many,  if  not  moft  of  them, 
were  Men  of  Sin  with  an  Accent ;  yea, 
I'eafts  rather  than  Men  ;  yea,  even  Mon- 
fttrs  in  Iniquity  :  See  Dr.  Hcylirfs  Cofmog. 
pag.  1 06,  107,  108.  of  the  la  ft  Edition, 
where  you  have  a  Black-Bed  Roll  of  their 
State  and  Story,  to  the  number  of  Thirty 
one,  which  is  a  lucky  Number,  call'd  an 
even  Hitter,  and  is  (aid,  a  Knave  and  One 
and  Twenty,  (or  in  plainer  Englim,  a 
Knave,  that  ftands  for  ten  [Knaves  ]  and 
One  and  Twenty  more  (of  the  lame  litter, 
or  letter)  wins  all  at  the  Game  of  Noddy 
this  Chriftmaft  time,  wherein'  The  Knave 
'.'.  t?*9  is  turned  up  Trump  with  a  wit- 
:e(?-r.  Seealfo  J^V^  Difa-cefj  of  /intichrtft, 
G  pag. 


6$  The  Notorious  Life 

pag.  96,  p,  5:8,  99,  60,61,62.  \Vhereyou 
have  a  Compendious  Landskip  of  but  a  few 
of  the  Popes  Lives  (  all  gathered  out  of 
their  own  'Roman  Writers  )  to  (hew  in  fhort, 
what  Beafo,  what  Mongers  cf  Men  they 
have  been  :  And  that  this  great  Truth  may 
be  Ccmpleatly  Confirmed  by  the  Mouth  of 
even  Three  Wttneffis,  See  alfo  Dr.  Scalter  in 
his  Comment  upon  the  Second  of  Theffahn. 
pag.  1 1  $•,  where  he  faith,  [  If  a  Man  may 
be  fb  bold  with  the  Pop*,  as  f  0,60  Bapift  was 
with  our  Saviour  (  and  why  ihould  C&nj? 
be  more  Rudely  Handel'd  than  Anticbrtft  ) 
Asking,  [_Art  then  He  tbatfiould  come,  or  do 
we  look  for  another  ?]  The  like  Anftver  may 
moft  properly  be  Returned,  [  Go  and  Tell 
what  yen  heard  and  feent  to  Wit,  Cod  is  Ccn- 
fcmrfdi  the  Devils  are  J-Fbrflnpd,  Religion  is 
Tropbanft,  Superftiticn  is  Hatto^dj  Beaftly 
Luft  is  Prafttcdj  and  Yarricide  is  not  only  Ter.- 
fftrated,  but  PatrenizfJ, ']  with  much  more 
Horrid  Hellifhnefs  thole  [  Par  fa  prcoi  He- 
wine*  "j  or  Wicked  Popes  have  done  :  Is  not 
this  tlie  Man  cf  S;w,  the  dpccalypticL  Beafi, 
the  Matcblefs  Mcnpef,  Prophecy 'd  of  in  the 
it'ord,  that  fhouki  conic  into  the  World  and 
play  Rex,  and  his  Pranks  in  it :  Now  'tis 
below  this  prelent  Pope  to  be  better  than 
his  Piedcceiiors,  He  Scorns  to  Degenerate 
the  Worfr  of  them,  ehufing  rather  to 

Imitate 


of  this  prefent  Tcpe  of  Rome. 

imitate  them,  than  Holy  Peter.  The 
Prophet  Stiles  him  a  Beaft  ,  and  Time  hath 
proved  him  Ib.  Our  next  Work  is  to  fhew 
him  the  Infntiable  One  ,  for  Craft  and  Cru 
elty. 

The  Epithet  Infatiable  hath  Variety  of  Ac- 
ceptions,.  according  to  the  Variety  both  of 
its  Suhjeff  and  Objett*  There  be  various 
Pdffions  of  the  Mind  of  Mart ,  tliat  are 
H'eadftrong,  Extravagant  and  Infatiable, 
whereby  Man  is  turned  into  a  Beafr,  as 
Thus, 

Firft,  The  Paffion  of  Ltift,  when  it  grows 
Unruly  and  Ungovernable,  Tranfporting.ttie 
Monk  out  of  his  Monaftery  into  the  Nun 
nery  among  the  Nuns,  or  liippole  the  Man 
a  Cardinal)  or  a  Pope,  when  he  is  Exported 
•out  of  all  Bonds  and"  Bounds  of  Tempe 
rance  and  Continency  ,  his  Unruly  Liijt 
cauieth  him.  Rudely  to  break  His  Vow  of 
Chaftity,  and  He  hereupon  Applys  himlelf 
ro  lii?  common  Curte&ansj  or  Don  Olvr^pia^s, 
then  is  the  Beafr  truly  £tiled  Infatiable. 
Or 

Secondly,  When  that  Paflibn  of  Bloud* 
Thirliinefs  hath  the  like  prevalency  over  the 
Mind  of  Man,  makes  him  as  Savage,  and'. 
as  Blondy-Minded  as  a  Butcher"  or  Be^^ 
Mlornnch,  that  He  Delights  to  Wallow  in 
•'u.1  BloiuVof  others,  yea;  to  be  Drunk  with1 
J8  z  the 


7o  7 be  tfi-tori-w  life 

the  Blond  cf  the  Saints  (  whica  is  the  Trick 
of  the  Beafy  )  then  is  the  Beaft  Rightly 
Branded  with  being  Infat  table,  and  then  'tis 
High  Time  for  good  Froteiiants  to  put  up 
this  good  Frayer,  Lord  let  this  Drunken  In- 
fatiable  Bea/t,  Spue  and  Tall,  find  never  Rife 
ftp  any  more,  of 

Laity,  (  To  Omit  other  Exorbitant  Pafl 
lions  and1  Affections  of  Mankind ',)  the  Third 
Cafe  is,  When  the  Connatural  Paflfion  of 
Covetoufntls  hath  got  fuch  a  Predominancy- 
over  the  Mans  Mind,  that  it  Metamorpho- 
fes  htm  into  a  Muck-worm ,  yea  ,  into  a 
Mole,  that  Snbterraneal  Blind  Creature, 
which  lives  altogether  within  the  Earth  (be 
ing  Reitlefs,  as  out  of  ks  Center,  while 
out  of  it  )  and  hath  nothing  to  do  with 
Heaven  :  Mu ft  Evermore  have  his  Mouth  . 
and  Claws  full  of  Earth,  when  the  Manvtill 
Extraft  Gain  out  of  a  very  mnghil,  a  Vaft 
Revenue  for  Indulging  Stews,  and  that  as 
a  Necefiary  Convenience,  [  Ai  purgandos 
Renes  j  efpiicially  in  the  1  hree  Hot  Months 
of  the  Year,  when  the  Man  doth  practical 
ly  approve  of  that  Motto,  [  Lttcri  bonus 
eft  cdor  ex  re  tjufyzbet,  ~]  and  that  other  too, 
f  Lucrum  c  Lotio  eft  Optabile,  ~]  Theje  were 
the  Old  Symbols  of  *  fbme  Great  Men  of 
Rome,  who  thought  all  Gain  Sweet,  though 
r.or  out  of  the  Pite-Pot,  &c.  And  this 

Grot: 


of  this  prefent  Tope  of  Rome.      7 1 

Great  Man  of  Rom3  is  no  Changling  from 
them,  He  is  for  getting  the  Devil  and  all, 
with  his  Cain  front  all  .Quarters,  Ifa.  y6.  IT. 
and  Micah  3.  3.  ferTctum,  Then  alfo  is 
the  Beaft  Invariable,  and  upon  this  1  hird  .Ac 
count  it  is,  that  the  Trcfbtt  Malachi  the  Se 
cond,  aforefdid,  calleth  in  His  Characters, 
this  very  Odefchahho  (  the  prefcnt  ?ope  ) 
Bcllua  Infatabilts,  as  a  late  Learned  Writer 
doth  veil  Interpret  it :  Though  this  Beaft 
(>f  Rente  hath  been  Infati/tb!e  enough  as  is 
fuppofed,  in  the  Firft  Cafe  and  Account  of 
Infaiiak'Hty,  when  he  look'd  upon  Carnal 
Ccncuptjcencc  with  Romifl)  Spectacles,  and 
according  to  the  lopifh  Doctrine,  but  a 
FeccaJillo,  a  Trick  of  Tcuth,  a  Vtriial  Sin  j 
He  had  that  Flefh-ptealing  Circular  faying, 
£  Confefs  after  Sin,  Sin  and  Confefs,  in  Infioi- 
tum,3  in  great  Veneration,  as  a  Sovereign 
Cure  for  a  Popifh  Confcience,  and  indeed, 
'tis  a  wonder  that  all  the  World  (  which  lays 
in  Wickednefs,  i  John  y.  19.  )  will  noteafily 
turn  Papifts,  that  they  may  Sin,  in  Sins  of 
all  forts,  with  Peace,  wherein  they  can 
Blefs  themfelves  with  Pardons  prepared  and 
to  be  Purchafed :  But  to  let  that  pa(s,  feeing 
the  JeftlitS  Rule,  [  Si  non  ca/e,  tamen  caute  ] 
Anticipates  Intelligence  of  fuch  Deeds  of 
Darknels,  till  the  Pond  come  to  be  Scowred 
again,  wherein  were  found  Thousands  of 
G  3  Infanps 


7%  The  Notorious  Life 

Infants  Skulk,  which,  as  it  promoted  the 
Deftruftion  of  Abbeys  here,  fo  in  Time  eve 
ry  where,  yea,  of  Rome  it  felf,  that  JSrn 
thel-flcitfe  of  Babylon.  My  Work  at  jprelfcnc 
is,  to  give  him  his  due  Character  of  an  Infa- 
tiable  Healt  in  both 'the  other  Refpefts,  with 
a  little  i'ranipoiition  of  the  Third  ,  (  as 
coming  next  to  Hand  into  the  Seconds 
place  )  to  wit,  both  as  a  Greedy  and  as  a 
Cloudy  loanable  Beaft. 

This  Prophet  Malacbi  (  the  Irifli  Monk) 
hath   Divine  Warrant  to  call  this  Pope  an 
Infatiabk  Bea/f  ,   feeing   the   Prcpb.-t  Ifaiab 
calls   fuch    Priefts  (  ejufdem  Faring   of  the 
'fame  Erann  with  this  High  PrieftJ  Greedy 
Dogs,  which  can  never  have  enough ,   Ifa.  f  6. 
10,  ;i.  and  though  they   were  dumb  Do^ 
and  could  not  bark,  yet  could  they  bite  well 
enough,  perverting  the  Houfe  of  God  for 
Prayer  into  a  Den  of  Cut-Throat  Thieves  : 
How  far  this  Pope  hath  been  the  Jewifli 
"Prophets  Greedy  Der,  and  the  frifh  Prophets 
Insatiable  Beajt,  falls  fir  It  in  Order  to  De- 
monitrate  :  fb  His  molt  Eminent  and  Gain 
ful  Cks4ts,  whereby  he  Gulls  the  filly  People, 
Cohere  follow. 

He  is  (in  the  General )  the  Grand  Impo- 
jhr  of  thejfarld,  fo  the  Page  was  cali'd  by 
Doctor  Morten  Eifhop  ot  Durdm  many 
^  ears  ago,  vvhpjfe  Elaborate  Cook  Difiourfr 


of  this  prefent  Pope  of  Rome.       7  3 

eth  the  many  Legerdemain  Tricks  where? 
wirh  He  decei-mth  Nations,  and  all  and  only 
to  pick  their  Pockets. 

May  we  but  be  let  in  a  little  to  behold 

the  Bowels  of  this  Grand  Cheat,  and   View 

but  a  while  his  Guts  and  Garbage,  'twill 

(bon  be  Difcerned  that  he  is  the  Devils  Par 

triarky  bearing  upon  his  Banner  the  Abomi* 

•nation  ef  Desolation  :  The  time  would  fail  to 

tell,  How  many  Families  this  Abominable 

Beaft  hath  made  Defolate  :  what  elfe   is  the 

whole  Cento  and  Fardle  of  Popery  ,  but  a 

Concatenation  of  Wiles  to  compals  a  pnrfe  ? 

What  is  the  chief  Detign  of  this  .Balaam  of 

Rows,  but  a  continual  conjuration  for  an 

Houfe-fttll  of  Gold  and  Silver?  Witnefs  his 

lying  Legends ,  His  Mock-Miracles  ,  fraying 

for  the  Dead,  and  a  Thouiand  more  nimble 

Tricks  too  tedious  to  enumerate,  but  above 

all ,  His  Doctrine  of  Purgatory ,    The  Fire 

whereof  doth  more  effectually  warm  tke 

Popes  Kitchm ,  than  Torture  any  Soul  He 

Damns  into  it.     '1  is  a  Cheat  of  Cheats :  Me- 

think?  the  Apojlle  Peter  points  at  this  Pope, 

(Who   pretends  to  be  his  Sticcefibr)  while 

he   fpea-ks   of  fuch ,  as  through  Covetoufnefs 

with  feigned  Words,  do   make  Mtrchandife 

of  Men,  and  when  He  names  Balaam  tit 

Sen  of  Bofor,  who  loved  the  wages  cf  Iniquity 

fo  far,  until  the  Vitmb  Afs  forbad  the  mad- 

G  4  fiefs 


Notorious  Life 

nefs  of  the  profane  ?  rcpbet,  yet  Hs  .cannot 
pas  oil  Wi'hout  paring  a  Divine  Lor.m, 
ftving,  whofe  Ju^^f»r,Jt  nnv  if  a  tcng  rive 
lirgretbj  and  yet  ihtir  Damnation  jlumbrcth 
not,  2 Pet.  2.  3.1^,  1.6.  How  can  it  Jinmbeir 
long,  vvhep  the  cry  of  his  cheating  'I  neks 
(together  with  tkit  of  Ehud)  is  gone  up  to 
Heaven  to  lietch  down  Gods  Vtngeance 
upon  this  Topes  j^ead,  and  upon  his  vvi.Oid 
fcpeJom :  Let  the  dfopje  Paul  aifb  joyn 
IHue  in  this  matter  with  his  bdciad  ftttr, 
(borh  wlich  iire  reprefenttd  B/«//J;T*£,  as 
before,  at  fiich  pittiful  pretended  Succef. 
fors  )  who  faith  likewife  [  as  Jannes  and 
Januires  with  flood  Mofes,  jo  do  tb^e  :he  Mt\- 
fias,  Mtn  of  corrupt  A^inds,  (in$  Reprckatf 
concerning  the  Faith  :  Rut  tiny  fiall procetd  no 
further^  fcr  their  folly  faall  be  made  wanifcft 
to  all  Mtn->  as  theirs  aljo  was,  2 1  im  3.  8,  9. 
Now  what  Were  Janms  and  Jambrcs,  but 
a  couple  of  Gipfy  or  ^Egyptian  Ccujunrs, 
that  cheated  the  People  with  thejr  lying 
JMiracles,&c.  And  fuch  have  (oiiie  of  the 
Topes  of  Rome  (that  Myflical  ts£gypt,  Rev.  i  r . 
8.)  been,  &c.  [  Habemus  Reos  Conftentes  } 
Popiih  Authors  do  acknowledg  it,  and  did 
JMofei  muzzle  the  Months,  and  made  their 
Cheats  manifeft  to  all  Men  ?  How  much 
more  will  the  Mejpas  (who  is  greater  than 
Heb.  3.3.)  confound  in  due  time 

this 


of  this  prefent  Pope  of  Rome,      75- 

this  Grand  Impiftcr.  'Tis  impoflible  for  any 
Man  of  a  Sober  Mind  to  think  other  wile, 
efpeaal'y,  If  he  ca.t  but  a  feeing  Kye  up 
on  [7tixa  Centers  slppftolic<e~\  the  Apo^oli- 
cal  Chamber  in  the  Vatican  at  Rome,  where 
this  Pc.pe  harh  opend  his  Pedlars' tack,  expo- 
fed  all  his  Vendible  Commodities  (for  Ro 
ma  Omnia  Venalia,)  to  the  belt  Advantage 
of  commending  them  to  his  Chapmans  Eye, 
no  Mop  fb  well furriilhed,  orattbrds  filch, 
1  empting  Propped:  in  any  of  the  Walks 
of  the  Royal  Exchange  Chambers,  and  that 
which  gives  the  molt  Splendid  and  Decoy- 
ng  Luitre  is ,  there  you  have  the  Pope 
limfelf  in  his  Grandeur,  Courting  in  Cutto- 
mers,  gcod  Man,  He  dare  not  trull:  his  Vat 
als,  a  pack  of  Knaves,  He  hath  found  them 
ong,  wou'd  go  Snips  with  their  Malter,  He 
la's  now  Learnt  by  His  Loft.  Keep  the  Shop 
ilobin,  and  it  iv'dl  keep  tLee.  There  himfelf 
'tands  crying  in  the  very  Language  of  Folly 
•  not  of  Ifcidom]  who  Jo  is  J&ttplt ,  let  him 
urn  in  Hither,  Prov.9.  16.  He  Cants  in  his 
Profelytes  with  Pedlars  Pedantic  k  Oratory, 
"toying  them  in  with  come  along  my  Cro* 
ties,  my  Soft  Pates  (Tor  you  mult  fuppofe 
"~ !  is  of  the  fame  Sentiments  with  that 
Crafty  Sbcp-Keeper,  who  once  Boated,  He 
A/ould  not  fell  all  his  Children  and  Fools,  his 
Ciuftomers,  for  Ibme  Hundreds  of  Pounds 

in 


y  6  The  Notorious  Life 

in  the  Year )  come  along  my  Corculums, 
look  about  you ,  Gentlemen  ,  what  lack 
you  ?  Lo,  here's  a  Goofe-Giblet  Pye,  wherein 
every  Palate  may  pleafe  it  felf,  what  will 
ye  buy  P  I  am  juft  now  upon  my  laft  Legs, 
my  long  Leafeof  1260  Years  is  now  at  its 
lait  Gulp  and  Expiration,  what,  never  a 
packing- penny  among  you  all  for  a  poor 
packing-oil  *'-.pe:  But  are  you  Defirous 
jto  know  his  War^s  fall  very  Vendible  to  the 
Credulous,  that  never  think  of  the  Cheat) 
What  are  his  Commodities  in  particular  >  \ 
\vil!  tell  you  ,  where  you  have  them  all 
named,  and  we  are  not  a  little  obliged  to 
the  Infallible  Holy  Gkoft ,  that  will  take  all 
the  pains  in  giving  us  a  DillincT:  Catalogue 
of  all  this  Infallible  Gheftly  Fathers  Commo 
dities  :    He  tells  you,  Rev.iS.  12,13.  in) 
t'mfts  Stately  Shop,  you  may  have  for 
jt  Mqney  [the  Merchandise  of  Gold  an&\ 
ery  preci&us  Stones  and  Pearls,  fae  Lenncy\ 
Purple,  all  Silk  and  Scarlet,  all  Thjne  6/j 
Sweet  Wooel,  all  wanner  cf  Vefl'els  of  focrm 
ell  manner  of  VeJJ'eh  of  precious  Wood  ,  of) 
Jlrfffs,  of  Iron,  and  of  Marble ;  yet  more,1 
yea,  and  Cinnamon,  Oacitrs,   and  Omtmentsi 
yea,  Fnrnkincenfe,  Wine  and  Oyl,  yea,  fivei 
'floorer  and  Wheat,  yet  more,  there  be  Beaftsl 
and  S&etfr  and  Her  fa,  (  I  wonder  Affes  are 
kft  outj  and  Chariots,  an<i  Slaves,  (no  doubt 

odl 


cf  tins  prefent  Pope  of  Rome.      77 

n't,  :but  the  greateft  Ware  is  behind  J  the 

of  Men. 

Who  will  not  lay  here  [God  blelsus] 
Vjhat  a  Shop  is  this?  So  Capacious,  and  fo 
xrcommodated  with  all   the  choicelt  and 
hlefeft  Commodities,  that  this  lower  World 
.an  atford  :  Here's  the  Riches  of  both  the 
(Gold,  Silver,  and  precious  Stones  there" 
f )  Here's  the  Riches  of  allCountrys  and 
kingdoms,  betwixt  Eaft  arid  Weflt  North 
and  South  :  Here's  the  very  Quinteiience 
and  Compendium  of  Europe ,  of  AJia,  of 
if  rick  ,   and  of  America :    is  not  this  the 
Grand  Impoftor,  that  even  call'd  for  a  pack- 
ng-penny  p  a  poor  Pope,  who  hath   ib 
much  of  Treafure,  enoughto  fcrve  himfelf 
and  enough  to  fell  to  others,     But  I  wonder 
lie  expoieth  his  Scarlet  to  Sale,  Having  fo 
much  ufe  for  it  to  Array  the  Scarlet  H^hore : 
as  alfo  that  the  Beaft  fnould  be  a  Seller  of 
and  above  all,  I  wonder  what  price 
He  fas  u  pon  the  Souls  of  Men :  feeing  our 
Chriit  (who  belt  knew  the  worth  cf 
Souls,  becaufe  He  onely  went  to  the  price 
f)f  Sou  Is  J  Gained   cne  Soul  worth  the   whcle 
ld,  Matth.  16.  26.  Surely  He  muit  be 
jdntichrifty  who  fettetb  Souk  for  Trifies  : 
Iu  a  Word,  furely,  This  Pope  is  Jack  of  att 
s  :  Here  he  is  a  Goldl'with,  .with  his 
and  Silver,    and  it  may  be  a  Banker, 

I  wun 


78  ?w  Notorious  Life  l 

I  wi(h  him  to  become  a  Bankrupt.  Here  he 
is  a  Jeweller,  with  his  Pe^r//  and  Precious 
Stones.  Here  he  is  a  Linnen-Draper,  with 
his  F;»e  L*wT£»  and  Purple,  ( I  doubt  He 
wants  the  Scetcb-Clctb.)  Here  you  have 
him  a  Silk-Man  with  his  Silks  of  all  forts, 
and  fear  nor,  but  he  has  S^ttew  (  or  Sa 
wn  )  enough.  Here  he  is  a  Turner,  that 
Sells  all  forts  of  Vcgels,  wherewith  he  Tur 
the  World  Upfide  Down  ;  this  He  effects  by 
Veffilscf  Wra:b,  but  He  Sells  for  Slaves  the 
Vejjels  of  Mercy.  Here  you  have  him  one 
while  a  Bvaz,f.r  with  his  Brafs ;  another 
while  an  Ir en- Monger  with  his  /row  ;  yea, 
fbmetimes  a  Stcnc-Cntter,  with  his  Marble, 
and  why  not  a  7i»&r  too,  being  a  Kin  to 
him,  that  inltead  of  mending  fome  Holes, 
made  many  more,  yet  was  well  paid  for 
his  pains.  Here  he  is  a  Drugrift)  with  his 
Ctxnamon,  Occurs  and  Ointmtnt,  &C.  not 
one  Sophisticated  Drug  amongit  them  all. 
Here  he  comes  as  a  Vintner  with  his  Bottles 
of  Wait  to  comfort  the  Heart,  and  his  Cruifes 
of  Oil  to  Chear  and  Clear  the  Countenance; 
'tis  well  if  there  be  not  a  Tincture  of  the 
Wine  of  Sodom  among  Hands.  Yea,  ra 
ther  than  fail  ,  He  becomes  a  Corn-Chand- 
ler,  affording  you  Wheat,  either  broken  in 
to  Flour  (  with  Bran  enough  in  it )  or  in 
the  whole  Grain,  but  a  little  Mufty  by  lay-  f 

ing' 


of  this  frefent  Pope  of  Rome.      79 

ing  in  a  bad  Granary  or  Garner,  the  A- 
poltolical  Chamber.    Yet  lower,  nay  rather 
than  fit  Idle,    he  will  come  as  a  Ruiiick 
Drover  to  Sell  Beafts,  and   Sheep,    arid  Ht/r- 
£/,  (  well  Mouthed  and  Man'd  all,  and  made 
as  Tame  as  Affix.)  And  at  lait  he  comes  as 
a  Coach- Maker,  who  has  his  Charots  to  Sell, 
but  have  a  care  they  carry  you  not  to  PAT- 
ratory  inftead  of  Abrahams  Bofcm.     But  to 
Crown  up  the  Catalogue  of  all  his  Commo 
dities,  Note,  that  which  we  Read  Slaves, 
dothfignifit  [jW/w,  ]    which  he  Sels  for 
Slaves,  and  the  Souls  of  Men  too.    And  fb 
^altly,  he  becomes  a  Body-feller,   and  (  to 
make  a  thorough-whole-fale  Trade,  a  Soul- 
"eller  alfo.    Let  us  all   (  with  Mofes )    turn 
ifide  to  lee  this  great  Wander,  fure  I  am,  ns- 
/er  did  Proteus  turn  himfelf  into  fb  many 
Chapes,   never  did  any  Jefuit    (  this  Popes 
Creature  )  Convert  himlelf  into  ib  many 
fallings,   as  His  Marter  is  here  Reprefent- 
d  in.    The  Pope  hath  made  a  Monopoly 
)f  all  Employs  to  himfelf,  both  in  City  and 
Country.     And  the  greateft  Merchants  Shop 
whole  Riches  lay  not  there,   but  in  the 
i^arehoiife  )   cannot,   though  taken  both 
ogether,    be  compared  to  the  Afoftclical 
Chamber.     One  coming  into  a  Merchants 
hop   (  I  knew  the  Man,   a  Ruftick  Carri- 
r  ) .  and  feeing  no  Goods  therein,  Bluntly 

Asks 


So  The  Notorious  Life 

Asks  the  Apprentice  (  fitting  alone  in  the? 
Shop  )  what  was  Sold  there.''  the  Malapert 
Youth  Anfwered,  We  Sell  Loggerheads^  lay 
you  (b,  faith  the  Ruliick,  Then  you  have 
a  Quick  Market  for  them,  feeing  I  fee  but 
One  left  in  the  -Shop.  There  is  no  Danger 
of  any  Citizen  or  Countryman  either  Miffing 
(what  Wares  he  would  beat)  or  Miftakings 
^f  that  Nature,  for  here's  all  things  Expole d 
ro  View.  There  is  yet  One  Mifchief  men-* 
tion'd,  Revel,  i8-.ii.  where  (this  Rich  Shop 
is  Inventory 'd  )  that  jSTo  Man  Buyeth 
Merchandise  any  more  : .  This  will  break  hirtf 
at  laft. 

But  let  my  Countrymen  take  thefe  Two1 
Cautions, 

Firft,  Have  a  care  of  a  Cheat  in  his  cor-; 
nipt  Commodities  ;  for  he  fells  them  all  iii 
a  very  dark  Shop,  not  differing  you  to  ex1-' 
ercife  your  own  Reafbn  ,  you  muft  take' 
all  upon  his  crack'd  Credit,  and  comply' 
with  His  pnce  in  an  Implicit  Faith,  and  in 
blind.  Obedience  you  muft  believe  what  the' 
Pope  believes,  and  he  is  no  luch  Fool  as 
(iifcommend  his  own  Wares,  He  belt  Em 
braces  Blindfold  Buyers,  Ignorance  ;s  the  J/"- 
to&  of  his  Merchandise. 

The  Second  Caution  is,  'Tis  dangem:.- 
venturing  into  this  Sipoft-clicalCbamtter,  lea  ft' 
0>j?  Grand  Cheat  pick  vour   pocket?,  tor 

though 


8  2,  The  Notorious  Life 

of  the  Revelation  is  fo  Abftrule  and  My.le-t. 
rious,  that  it  requires  another  Revelation  to  * 
unfold  its  Myitery  :  I  confefs,  I  have  con-"-, 
fulted  fbme  Learned  Interpreters  upon  the 
plnce:    Cut  that  which  is  Inftar   Owning, 
and  gives  a  None-Such  Interpretation  is  the 
cbttf  Emitter  of  the  Apoiroiick  Chamber  in 
his  Infallible  Account  Book. 

Never  did  the  profcundeft  Interpreter  (  no 
not  the  Accutei?  of  their  own  Popifo  Po/iKers) 
make  a  plainer  Explanation  of  any  Dark 
Scripture  ,  than  this  Popes  Auditor  Gene-  ; 
r/z/hath  made  of  Rev.  1 8.  12. 13.  All  the 
Voluminous  Quirks  of  the  moft  Mercurial 
J'efuits  [_  Cajetsm,  Me-ido&a,  Salmeron,  &rc.^ 
are  comparatively  but  Iniiped  Stuff,  and 
dull  Defcants  to  that  one  ^udit/rs  Record  of- 
the  Romi(h  Merchandife  in  this  Popes  Apo- 
itolical  Chamber  Yea,  the  Chaise  Paraphrafe, 
orOnkelos(fo  much  cry'd  up  m  the  World) 
is  but  a  Jejune  Piece  to  ir.  1  bis  is  the  Master 
Piece  of  all,  wherein  what  be  the  Rtwifo 
Pearls  and  precious  Stcnes,fcc.  are  made  Ib 
Ltgtble  and  Intelligible ,  that  every  common 
Capacity  may  both  stpprehevd  and  Compn- 
btnd  the  right  Notion  of  them. 

In  that  known  Court-Rolls  and  Rate- 
Ecok,  isRegiltred,  and  made  publick  ;l-e 
common  and  current  Price  otamary  choice 
and  curious  Commodities,  as  Pard.n^  In- 

dignity 


of  this  prefent  Pope  0/Rome.      83 

,  Licences ,  Absolutions,  Sec.  what 
ever  you  have  a  mind  to  buy  :  Indeed  the 
Crys  of  Vendible  Wares  in  the  Streets  of 
London  [_  will  you  buy  this,  &C.  and  will  you 
buy  that,  &c.  3  are  both  [_  ^MU^H  and 
i  s\t  •'."//  ]  manifold  and  fbmewhat  hard 
i  to  be  understood,  efpecially  in  fome  of  the 
:  cryes  :  but  the  cryes  and  cutcryes  in  the  Street s 
\  of  Rome,  do  far  exceed  the  belt  of  curs,  yea 
that  of  Dainty  Trotters,  Curious  Tjotters :  But 
they  that  have  a  mind  toTrot  to  Rome,  may 
There  hear  far  better  Crys,  as  this  for  one 
[will  ye  buy  any  Bodies,  will  ye  buy  any 
Souls  of  Men?  ~]  This  is  a  Raree-Show  In 
deed,  and  fiich  a  Tickling  ,  Tempting  Cry, 
as  will  oaufe  empty  Houfes,  who  would  not 
Run  out  (  though  the  Pot  be  boiling  upon 
die  Fire,  and  the  Spit  turning  at  it )  to  lee 
the  Wonders  of  the  Beaft  ?  Revel.  13.  3,  13, 
14.  Who  would  not  but  defire  to  be  a 
Chapman  for  (  at  leaft  to  Cheap  )  his  Rare 
Commodities? 

But  becaufe  it  may  feem  a  little  below 
His  Highnefs  and  Holinefs,  to  become  a  com 
mon  Cryer,  He  hath  learnt  the  Trick  of 
pur  Nimble  Quacks  and  Don  jQuick-Sots ; 
as  every  common  jj>uack  and  Mountebank, 
Prints  now  his  Bills,  Hands  them  out  Gratis 
with  much  Generofity,  yet  catches  Children 
Foals  enough  to  pay  for  them  ;  there 
H  you 


§4  ?be  Notorious  Life 

j 

you  have  fet  down,  Elixir  Vita  at  fb  much, 
Elixir  Salutis  at  fb  much  j  the  Golden  Spirit 
at  fb  much,  the  Scurvy  Spirit  at  fc  much, 
Sovereign  Powder  forlb  rnxch,  the  Tlai/far, 
cali'd  AU-Hcal,  for  fo  much,  and  Twenty 
Rarities  more  (  all  Arcanums  )  none  At 
tains  to  fiich  a  Secret  as  himielf  ;  every 
thing  Expofed  is  good  for  all  things,  if  but 
a  Thumb-Battle  of  his  Liquor  be  Bought, 
'twill  Cure  all  Difeafcs;  if  but  a  little  ot 
his  Balfbm  be  Applied  ,  'twill  Heal  alt 
Wounds.  What  Madmen  be  thefe  to  be  ei 
ther  Slain  of  Die  in  the  mid.t  of  Ib  many 
Antidotes,  &c.  Yea,  the  Meuntebank  goes 
a  little  further,  He  comes  forth  Cum  Regis 
Privilege,  makes  Experiments  upon  him- 
felf,  both  in  Stabbing*  and  Poifonings,  Builds 
his  Theatre  ,  whereon  he  Expoleth  all  his 
Cheating  Tricks  to  Publick  View,  and  when 
the  Credulous  come  not  in  faft  enough  to 
make  their  Markets  there,  his  Merry- An 
drew  mult  Dance  upon  a  Rppe,  -play  Twen 
ty  pretty  Pranks  (  yet  all  the  while  more 
Knave  than  Fool )  to  Decoy  them,  and 
yet  when  all  is  done,  few  more  than  the 
kabble  are  Caught  in  the  Snare. 

So  this  Grand  ^uack  the  Pope,  and  JM 
ft er- Mount eb cink i  Prints  his  Dills  Cttm  Prir;~ 
%/<?,  commends  to  the  Life  his  Curfed 
Wares,  Acts  all  the  parts  of  the  former  to 

a  Threedf 


(f  this  prefexf  Pope  of  Rome.      $5 

a  Threed,  yet  Advances  upon  an  Higher 
Stage.  And  indeed  7  riis  Wares  have  a 
fttange  Operation.  If  but  a  Thumb- Rot  tic 
of  hislVme  of  Fornication  be  Drunk,  it  will 
Itrangely  Intoxicate  even  the  Kings  of  the 
Earth.  And  his  Jejuits  PeWer  vvill  work- 
Wonders. 

But  not  to  detain  you  in  the  Dark  any 
long -r,  If  you  have  a  mind  to  be  Cheated, 
or  only  to  fee  his  Cheats,  you'l  rind  his 
Printed  Bills,  Publiih'd  to  the'  whole  World 
with  Anticbrifs  Arms  itampM  upon  them, 
hi  his  Tax*  Camera  Apoftolica,  where  you 
have  the  Scarlet  Wbwtfs  Adulterated  Wares 
particularly  Reprefented,  both  in  their  Spe~ 
cicsj  Properties,  Profits  and  Prices,  yea,  and 
there  is  Mwfus  Diah'oli,  the  Herb  eall'd  De- 
<v'd-bit,  to  wrap  them  up  in,  call  into  the 
Bargain. 

Take  only  an  Anttyhnrmacon,  a  Divine 
A$ay  and  Prelervati've ,  along  vvith  you, 
kali:  your  Noltrils  be  oltended,  and  your 
Vital  and  Animal  Spirits  contract  any  Tin 
cture  of  Contagion,  while  I  am  ( to  fatisfk 
your  Cufiofity  )  but  a  little  way  Digging 
into  this  (linking  DungbiL  I  have  good  War 
rant  for  this  my  good  Work,  in  laying  open 
the  Cheating  Abominations  of  this  Scarlet 
Coloured  BeAft.  As  that  Man  of  Godt  greatt 
Elijah  could  not  tell  how  to  Ridicule  enough 

H  2  th» 


§6  Ike  Notorious  Life 

rhe  Prophane  Priefts  of  Baal,  i  Kings  1 8-. 
27.  Much  more  may  I  Ridicule  the  Grand 
Mafter  of  them,  and  this  cannot  be  hettes 
done,  than  by  giving  you  but  a  brief  Land- 
skip  of  the  Reman  Merchandize  ,  a  bare 
Recitatim  whereof  is  a  furficient  Refutation 
to  any  Sober  and  Right  Thinking  Mind. 

The  ^poftolical  Chamber  Pons  up  its  [Si 
J^w,  &c.  J  If  any  one  want  this  or  that 
Popifli  Trumpery,  they  may  c.mt  and  be 
welcomes.*.  tkis^rt/e»f  Popes  Ware-houie,  pro 
vided  always  they  come  with  Money  in 
their  Hands,  and  come  up  to  the  cu?n  nt 
Price  (  by  Canon-  Law  )  of  each  Vtndi'  le 
Commodity ;  come  along  my  Hearts,  My 
So»,  Give  me  thy  Heart.  You  (hall  have 
Robin  Hood  Penniworth3j  enough  for  your 
Money  in  all  Confdence :  becaufe  you  are 
all  Friends,  you  ihall  all  be  very  Kindly 
Uled,  and  fo  Farcwd. 

A  Schedule  or  Lilt  of  the  Romijb  Wares, 
this  Pope  (  the  Lord  of  the  Manour  )  Ex- 
pofeth  ro  Sale  by  Inch  of  Candle,  take  as 
followeth, 

Imprimis ,  Hi?  Expofeth  hisPick-pockering 
Pardons  of  all  forts  and  fizes,  and  the  Prices 
thereof  ( in  Ibme  of  them  )  are  fet  down 
in  Black  and  White  upon  the  Popes  Tables 
bung  out  to  PubHck  View,  or  fomething 
As 

k  Firfl.. 


83  Tlje  Notorious  Life 

fo  long  a  Time .  provided  he  may  have 
general  Warranty  for  fecuring  his  Bargain 
till  that  Tims  be  Expir'd ;  and  much  more 
of  this-Traih,  &c. 

i  '  Item,    stiifolutions  of  various  Prices,  ac 
cording  the  Crime  committed.     As 

Firlt,  For  Sacriledg  ,  Ten  Shillings  and 
Six  Pence. 

Secondly,  For  Symuny  in  a  Pneft  the  lame 
Price,  but  in  a  Lay-Man  the  odd  Eighteen 
Pence  (hall  be  Baited.  Kindly  done. 

1  hirdly,  For  Perjury,  'tis  a  Rich  Penny 
worth  at  Nine  Shillings. 

Fourthly,  For  Mttrdtr,  If  it  be  a  Prieft 
that  is  Kill'd,  it  cannot  be  Dear  at  one 
{_  Two  Pence  J  more  than  a  frlark,  J  would 
never  be  a  Fridl  there,  where  my  Life  is 
no  higher  Valued.  But  you  may  Kill  your 
father,  Mother,  Wife  civ  Sifter,  &C.  upon. 
Bailer  Tern]?,  That  fnall  but  eoft  you  Ten 
Shillings  and  Six'  Pence.  •<  , 

Fifthly,  For  Adultery,  Devouring  a  Vir^ 
gin  goes  at  Nine  Shilling?,  but  Inceft  with 
jMother,  Sifter,  &c.  is  cheaper,  palling  at 
Seven  Shillings  and  Six  Pence.  And  the 
Whore  that  Deftroys  her  Baltartf  Child  cji* 
ther  before  or  after  Birth,  hatli  the  lelf 
t'JnieSum  to  pay. 

Sixt'p.ly,  For   Burning  4  ±\eigkkou?s  ffouic 
,:  Do£'^;he;ip  at  Twelve  Shillings;   but  tor 

Burning 


oftbisprefentPoteofRQme..     89 

Burning  Heretical  Cities,    'tis  feverely  Pu- 
nim'd    with    being    Cammed  for    Saints  , 


Lieenrts  for  what  you  Lift. 

Fine,  it  you  be  a  Frieit  you  may  keep 
a  Whore,  paying  only  Ten  Shillings  and 
Six  Fence  ,  and  if  a  Lay-Man  it  will  colt 
you  no  more  ;  that  the  one  may  not  De 
ride  the  other. 

Secondly,  A  Ltctnfe  to  be  Lazy*  and  to 
become  an  ^%-^w/^er,  and  fb  to  be  Inutile 
fondus  Terr<c,  Living  there  like  Hogs  in  the 
Stie,  unufeful  to  Mankind  ,  unlels  to  the. 
Wanton  Nuns. 

Thvrdly,  A  Licenfe  to  be  Licentious,  and 
to  have  the  liberty  of  the  Stews  the  Three 
Hot  Months  of  the  Year ,  there  is  tbe  Ro- 
wan  Recipe  prefer ib'd  (  with  Dr.  Pope's. 
pobatum  eft  )  ad  ptirgandos  Renes.  1'his 
Grand  ^uack ,  or  great  Mountebank  ,  is 
Tender  of  his  Fro'elyte;  Health,  Allows  this 
Remedy  ( whic'i  God  never  thought  of, 
when  he  faid,  ' Jw  mt  gooti,  for  Man  to  be 
$i..ney  Gen.  3.  1 8.  )  to  prevent  his  Pope- 
Lugs  ( Under  the  V<n»  of  Cbaftity  )  from 
failing  into  Acme  Fevers,  and  to  (hew  hew 
good  .Matured  he  will  be  to  them  ('  Re 
membering  it  'had  been  his  own  needful  Fri- 
viiedg  and  Practice  )  you  may  have  thefe 
Two  lait  Licenfcs  (  both  to  bo-  La^y  and  to 
H  4  bv 


90  7  he  Notorious  Life 

be  Licentious  )  Gratis.  Gra-Mercy  up 
on  his  Kind  Heart,  they  (hall  not  coft  you 
a  Penny. 

Fourthly,  Vet  a  Licenfe  to  Eat  Flefi  in 
Lent,  will  colt  you  much  more,  tor  his  Lin- 
Holinefs  Infallibly  Tudgeth  this  to  be  a  far 
greater  Sin  than  to  keep  a  Whore.  Yea,  and' 
many  more  Indulgences. 

Item,  Here  you  may  have  Hly  Water 
Chymically  prepared,  Secundum  Artem  D*- 
bbdicam,  for  driving  away  the  Devil  •,  hence 
comes  that  Popifh  Proverb,  to  exprefs 
ibmetting  that  is  Hateful,  [  A  M*n  loves  it 
as  well  as  tie  Devil  loves  Hoi}  Waftr.\  You 
rnuft  fiippofe,  that  Water  which  the  Pope 
Conjures  into  the  like  Holinefs  with  his  own, 
is  able  to  Conjure  away  the  itrongelt  Devil 
in  Hell. 

Item,  You  may  have  Holy  Oil,  com 
pounded  according  to  the  lame  Art,  only 
'tis  an  Arcanum  and  Magisterial.  'I  he  Pope 
hath  been  (o  kind  to  let  the  World  know 
how  he  makes  his  Holy  Water •,  Piilij^g  it  out 
by  Conjuration  ;  but  be  hath  a  mind  to  be 
frivate  in  Confecrating  his  Holy  O//,  and 
when  he  hath  done  his  belt  to  it ,  have  a 
care  you  eat  it  not  with  a  Romifb  Sailer, 
leaft  it  be  mix'd  with  Jefuits  Powder ;  howv 
ever,  'tis  good  enough  to  Liquor  yaur 
Boots  after  your  long  Journey  to  Rome, . 

No 


cf  this  frefent  Pope  of  Rome.      9 1 

No  doubt  but  it  lerves  notably  as  an  Un 
guent  for  (  far  better  than  for  anointing  the 
Sick  to  make  them  well )  the  Popes  Cbaret 
W  keels,  makes  them  run  glib  in  all  Tran£ 
marine  Countreys,  and  is  now  calling  for  a 
waft  over  into  ours  ;  do  not  you  hear  Him 
at  CaUice ,  Crying ,  have  ever  for  Dover, 
have  cyer  for  England :  God  grant  Him 
contrary  Winds  ,  but  if  the  Prince  of  the 
Air  mult  be  permitted  to  lend  Him  a  lift 
with  a  Favonian  or  Favourable  Wind,  God 
grant,  this  proud  Myllical  Tharaoh  of  Spi 
ritual  tALgypt,  Rev.  ii.  8.  May  meet  with 
no  better  a  Fate  and  Fare,  than  that  Litteral 
King  of  <^£gyft  did;  who,  though  tor  ought 
we  know  to  the  contrary ,  had  as  fair  way 
and  weather  into  the  midic  of  the  Red  Sea, 
as  ijrael  had,  yet  when  Irrecoverably 
brought  into  an  unavoidable  Noofe  (  which 
He  could  not  Slip  nor  Retreat  from  )  then 
God  looked  out  of  the  black  fide  of  the  Cloud 
(  which  was  towards  His  Ho/,  as  the  brigbt 
fide  was  toward  Ifrael)  with  an  angry  Coun 
tenance,  took  oif  His  Cbaret  Wheels,  made 
them  ( though  never  fo  well  Oyled  with  His 
Priefis  Holy  Oyl )  drive  Heavily,  then  dowsM 
Him  $vith  a  Witneis,  and  drown'd  Him 
(too- ^  with  a  Vengeance,  Exod.  14.  7,20. 
22,23,  24>  2?»^-  I  cannot  but  be  confi 
dent,  that  the  Lord  will  look  through  this 

black 


91  The  Notorious  Lije 

black  cloudy  Di'fenfatian.,  with  a  look  of  Loie 
upon  his  own  People  (as he  did  upon  poor,- 
fsrplextd  Peter,  Luke  Z2.  61.)  and  with,  a 
fact  r  W->a*k  upon  this  great  Leviathan, 
His  HolyOyl  i:-all  fail  His  Chariot  Wheels, 
ard  they  ihall  never  become  as  the  Chariot  * 
of  Aminadab ,  England  cannot  ever  be  a 
Billing  People  to  Receive  Kim  : 

/few,  Here  you  may  have  His  He//  &*/* 
alio,  this  is  foundly  Conjured  likewiie  into  as 
good  an  Kolinefs  as  that  of  His  Holy  IVater, 
or  as  that  of  His  own  Holmtfs :  and  with  this 
&oly.  Stuff  tiie  Beaft  works  His  Mighty  Mi- 
^acles  and  Wonders :  What  place  ibever 
liath  this  Holy  Salt  fcattered  upon  it,  nei 
ther  the  Devil  nor  any  of  his  evil  Spirits 
have  any  power  againlt  it .-  *Tis  a  wonder 
there  fhould  be  fo  many  Houfes,  Haunted 
wifh  Hobgoblins  all  over  His  HoltneJJes  Do 
mains,  Surely,  either  His  Holy  Salt  hath 
lo.c  its  effcatious  Vertue,  or  Himfelf  hath 
Joit  the  Ri,-,ht  Art  to  Cor)fecrate  it,  or  more 
likely,  the  Devil  is  in  H!S  Prieits  that  they 
Improve  it  not.  'Tis  a  wonder  this  oU  Sc+. 
phifter  doth  not  dafh  whole  handfuls  of  this 
Holy  Salt  in  the  Eyes  of  thole  Raw  Frefamen 
( thofe  Novices  as  he  calls  the  Proteftaurs) 
and  fb  to  blind  them  for  ever.  But  though 
this  will  not  do  (His  Holy  Salt  having  loll 
its  Efficacy  )  He  hath  a  better  Trick  behind 

far 


93 

far  more  Bioudy,  He  would  Bleed  and  Burn 
thofe  He  cannot  Blind :  If  His  Hdy  Sakha™ 
loft  its  Savour  (as  indeed  it  hath,)  othenvUe 
there  could  never  have  been  fo  much  Car 
rion,  for  wanj  of  Seafqning,  both  among 
Popes  and  His  PopelingsJ  what  is  it  good  to, 
bus  to  be  caft  to  the  Dunghil,  and  to  be 
Trotltn  Underfoot ?  Matth.  f.  13.  England  is 
as  the  Garden  of  'Eden,  never  any  Pcpe  that 
palled  through  the  Varyhwy  Chair  ( ever 
iince  the  Hrit  of  Ejectment  was  by  an  Al 
mighty  Hand  Served  upon  Him  to  diipollefs 
that  Devil  in  the  Reformation )  but  Be  hath 
lick'd  his  Lips,  and  longed  after  fbme  fiveet 
Lettuces,  that  Grow  in  this  Ewgty/j  Garden, 
God  grant  it  may  be,  as  the  Law  calls  that 
Writ,  an  Ejefficne  Firm*  :  that  this  evil  Spi 
rit  (  once  calt  out )  may  not  find  the  Houfc 
of  our  Land  (which,  God  knows  is  now 
'  neither  Swept  of  Moral  Vices,  nor  GarniJInJ 
with  Moral  Verities,  but  too  much  over- 
fpread  with  Epidemical  Immortality)  empty 
alto  of  all  Grace,  and  (6  Return  with  Seven 
u-orfe  Spirits  than  the  forwcr,  Matth.  12.  43, 
44,4^.  I  would  to  God,  England  were  not 
Jo  much  like   'Jericbo  ,  WJwfe   Situaticn  was 
fltajant.,  but  the  tt'aitrs  liter e  naughty  :  Our 
freih  River  of  Tbanrts  lecms  to  R.un  (6  near 
the  (alt  Waters-of  Tybur  (ever  fince  the 
c'.tr    Fuwtflim  with  b.'S  F^ef, 
Eztk. 


Notorious  Life 

Ezek.  34, 1 8.)  that  they  ta.:  a  little 
and  fomewhat  Imbib'd  with  the  Salt-Sea  of 
Rutne ,  'I  is  too  much  Tinged  with  the 
Tmtture  of  its  Holy  Salt,  Oh  where  is  that 
Elijka,  that  will  take  a  Crufe  of  better  Salt 
fthan  this  pcpes  HJySaltis)  happily  to 
hand  in,  that  our  Waters  may  be  HealedtStc. 
2  Kings  2  19,  20, 21. 

/rfw,Hereis  expofed  to  Sale  the  H?/y  M/4 
of  the  Vvrrm  Af^r/jWhich,  (ome  of  the  Popes 
Dolours  affirm,  is  as  Sovereign  and  Salvu 
fical  as  the  B'oud  of  her  Son  our  Saviour. 
However,  Tis  commended  moft  Highly  for 
never-failing  to  cure  Conftimptions,  far  ex- 
ceeding  the  Milk  of  an  Affe,  or  that  of  the 
Red-Cow.  What  Fools  are  the  Confump- 
tive  and  Phtifical  Popelings,  that  have  fuch 
a  Ready  Cure  by  them,  yet  fb  many  dye 
of  a  Confumfticn^  which  is  fb  Ranting  and 
Regnant  a  Difeafe  in  thofe  Hot  Climates: 
Nay,  What  a  Fool  is  the  Confumptive  Pcpe 
or  Antichrifr  himfelf,  who  doth  not  by  this 
trufty  trick  difapoint  the  Divine  Doom  pa£ 
fed  upon  him,  what  need  he  Fear  [that  the 
Lcrd  frail  CONSUME  Him  with  the  Spirit  of 
his  Mouth.~]  2  Theil  2.  8.  Seeing  an  Hearty 
Draught  of  this  Holy  Milk  will  cure  the  Cor- 
(umption  :  This  Pope  might  then  fay  as  one 
of  his  Hory  Predece.Tours  once  faid,  I  will 
.have  my  Will  [  Al  Jefyito  di  dio  ]  in  Du- 

fpiglrt 


. 

of  this  frefent  Pope  of  Rome.     $5 

ipight  bf  God ;  But  the  mifcheif  is,  neither 
the  Pope  nor  his  Popelings  dare  take  afuffi^, 
cient  Dofeofthis  Salmiferous  Antidote,  for* 
fear  of  marring  the  General  Market  hereof 
'tis  a  long  time  fmee  the  Blelied  Virgin  gave 
her  Milk,  and  they  can  expedt  none  in  her 
Glorified  Breafts,  the  old  Stoek  (fuppofe  eve 
ry  one  take  but  a  little  fup,  though  that  is 
not  enough)  muft  needs  be  far  (pent  in 
above  Sixteen  Hundred  Years,  and  where 
orhowthefe  Traders  make  their  old  Store 
bring  in  »eu>,  I  know  not,  unlefs  that  Image 
of  the  Virgin  ( which  bid  Bernard  Good  Mor 
row  at  his  entrance  into  the  Church,  and 
whom  that  Father  Rebuked,  becaule  She  a 
Woman,  took  upon  her  (contrary  to  the 
Truly  Apoitolical  Canon)  to  fpeak  in  the 
Church ,  might  fupply  ,  for  that  Idol  of 
Stone  might  equally  and  as  Probably  have 
Milk  in  its  Breaft  as  well  as  a  Voice  in  its 
Muth  -  But  that  which  fpoil'd  the  expecta 
tion  ofthisfrefh  fupply  of  Holy  Milk,  was 
the  Diicovery  of  a  crafty  Prieft  that  was 
crept  into  the  Hollow  Belly  of  this  Holy 
Image,  and  that  gave  IJoly  Bernard  the 
Hearty  Salutation ,  and  fure  I  am,  there 
could  not  be  much  Holy  Milk  in  fuch  a  Pro 
fligate  Priefts  Breaft,  who  durft  put  fuch  an 
affronting  Cheat  upon  fo  Holy  a  Father. 
But  fuppofe  there  were  fupply  then,  'tis 

above 


9  tf  The  Notorious  Life 

above  5-00  Years  ago,  and  this  cry  [wiH 
have  any  holy  Milk,  &C.~]  that  Mi'k-irre-t 
Market  mult  needs  be  down  ef£  now,  fe 
ing  all  their  Milk-Maids  (whereof  the;/ 
cannot  have  many,while  the  Indulged  Stews 
afford  his  Uuholinefs  fuch  a  vaft  Revenue  ) 
are  now  fiirely  fitting  upon  their  Empty 
Pales:  But  I  had  forgot  my  (elf  that  the 
Beaft  can  work  Wonders,  and  can  multi 
ply  that  Holy  Milk  (  though  but  little  from 
the  Blelled  Virgin)  as  well  as  Chriit  did  the1 
Barly  Leaves ;  Yea,  He  hath  done  it  to  fucli 
an  overflow,  that  the  Prfeits  (  all  the  Pope 
dom  over)  do  expofe  this  Holy  Milk  to  .Sale, 
all  pretending  that  theirs  is  the  very  Milk 
of  the  Virgin  Mary,  which,  were  all  they 
have  in  their  Conlecrated  Dairys  gathered 
together  into  One  place,  Solomons  prodigious 
Mdf-n  Sea  could  not  pofllbly  contain  it. 
Nay,  hereby  they  put  the  greatelt  Difho- 
now  upon  the  Hoiy  Mother  of  our  Lord 
(  whom  they  pretend  to  Adore  )  rn  making' 
Her  fuch  a  Milk-Beaftj  as  Ten  of  the  beiS 
Cows  in  Holland  cannot  give  the  like  quan 
tity  in  Ten  Years, 

Item,  Hulj-Bread  is  here  to  be  had :  The 
Pope  (good  Manj  takes  care  for  your 
Table,  and  to  furntfh  it  16  far  as  Holy  Watt 
Holy  O>7,  Holy  Salt,  Holy  Milk,  and  Holy 
Bretul  will  go- :  But  furely  all  rhefe  do  but 

look- 


of  this  prefent  Pope  of  Rome.      9  7 

look  like  a  Lent  Dinner,  I  hope  his  Holinefs 
keeps  a  better  Table  for  Himfelf:  If  you 
be  a  tpater  Drinker,  here's  the  belt  of  the 
Kind  ,  Holy  Water  for  yon  ,  of  the  Popes 
own  making  \  ftiould  have  (aid,  Ccnfecrating: 
If  you  be  a  Milk-Sop  ,  Here's  the  belt  of 
the  Kind,  Holy  Milk,  the  (elf  fame  your 
Saviour  Sucked  out  of  the  felf-lame  Freaits, 
When  he  was  a  Child,  and  who  u  ill  not  be 
content  with  the  tame  Fare  that  Ered  the 
Elefled  Babe  of  Betbltkem,  the  H  ly  Chid 
Jefus ,  and  becaufe  the  Majhr  of  this  L.  »r- 
ffaf,  will  not  undervalue  you  as  a  fort  of 
ibrry  Sucklings,  He  is  (o  Kmd-ljearted  as  to 
allow  you  Bread  to  your  Milk,  that  you 
may  fop  it  and  not  fuck  it,  is  not  £,  tng  and 
fv¥fm£  ?ooc^  F^re^  efpecially ,  ot  Udy 
Bread  and  Holy  Milk  You  inn  it  not  expect 
a  Glals  of  Wine,  for  I  rind  not  any  illy 
Hlne  in  the  Popes  Ware  focp.  Ptrba  ps  he  ai  d 
his  Prie/h  Monopolizes  it  wholly  to  them- 
(elves,  for  in  the  Euchariit,  the  Cup  is  tor- 
bid  to  you  of  the  Laity ,  you  mint  fuck 
Wtoe  out  of  the  Ercad,  If  you  would  have 
it,  and  can  catch  it. 

Neither  mu ft  you  grudge  that  yoli  have 
onfely  Bread  ( though  it  be  but  courfc  Ear- 
ley 'Bread,  fuch  as  you  were  never  poffibly 
brought  up  with )  *tis  however  Ildy  Bread, 
tlic  Holier,  and  (b  more  (atistadnry, 

becauie 


98  The  Notorious  Life 

becaufe  ( as  this  Mart-Mafter  teUs  Von  ) 
'tis  a  Fragment  of  tliofe  feme  Five  Loaves 
Wherewith  Chrift  fed  the  Multitude  i 
and  picked  out  of  the  Twelve  Baskets 
( that  -were  taken  away )  by  lome  of  the 
Popes  nimblelt  Snips,  but  I  wonder  how- 
they  have  kept  it  from  Moulding  ever  (ince. 
The  Moulded  Bread  wherewith  the  Gibeen-es 
cheated  Jofittat  was  not  lo  many  Hours  old* 
as  this  Hcly  Bread  is  Tears,  at  this  Day .  If 
it  be  Sound  Bread  that  is  ft  evvn  you,  take 
heed  you  be  not  cheated  with  it,  as  Jojhua 
was  with  the  'Mouldy  :  But  you  will  fay, 
why  is  Holy  Salt  prepared  for  the  Table, 
when  the  forementioned  Fare  needs  it  not  ? 
Anfwer,  You  muft  know  'tis  not  let  there 
for  Fafhion-lake  onely,  as  ordinarily,  for 

Item,  Here  you  may  have  Holy  Fiflj  too, 
and  of  the  felf-lame  two  Fifties  wherewith 
Chriit  Fed  the  Multitude  allb,  the  Bread 
and  the  Fifo  were  taken  out  of  the  fame 
Baskets ;  and  if  you  fiippofe  it  Frejh  Fiflj, 
then  there  is  ufe  for  your  Salt ,  but  to  pre 
vent  your  Second  Objection  about  the  ufe 
of  your  Cty/,  you  mint  rather  fuppofe  it 
Holy  Ftfo  Salted  with  that  Holy  Salt,  (it 
could  never  have  otherwiie  kept  fb  long 
Iweet  for  this  Sixteen  Centuries  )  and  then 
your  Htjlv  Oyl  will  make  your  Holy  Fifh  ( 16 
railed  ^ilip  down  the  better,  and  be  mo- 

di(h 


tf  this  prefect  Pope  of  Rome.      99 

difh  enough,  and  -what  would  you  have 
more,  is  not  here  enough  for  a  Four  Penny 
Ordinary. 

Item,  Befides  this  Belly-Timber,  here  you 
are  Treated  with  a  Numberlefs  Number  of 
Rarieties.  As 

Firft,  The  Affes  Tail  upon  which  Chrift 
Rode  ;  not  a  word  of  his  Ears. 

Secondly,  Jofepbs  Breeches  both  Thread 
bare  and  out  of  Famion,  they  will  do  you 
neither  Credit  nor  Service. 

Thirdly,  A  Feather  from  the  Cock  that 
Crew,  o  and  awaken'd  Peters  -Confcience ; 
yet  this  Startles  not  Peters  Succeflbr  for  his 
Apoftacy  ;  as  alfo  a  Feather  from  Grafoiels 
Wing,  taken  up  at  fuch  a  time  when  as  An 
gels  caft  their  Feathers. 

Fourthly,  Choice  Hair  Cloth,  the  lame 
as  Elijah  and  John  Baptift  wore,  good  e- 
nough  for  the  Pope  to  do  Penance  in,  for 
forcing  the  Witnelles  into  Sack-Cloth. 

Sixthly,  Whole  Cart  Loads  of  Apoftfes 
Bones ,  fometimes  thofe  of  a  Thief  (  as 
once  )  drops  in  among  them  ;  good  for  I 
know  not  what. 

Item,  Sold  at  a  very  Reafonable  Rate, 

Firft,    An    Holy   Rag    clip'd  otf  from 

Ch  rifts  Seamlefs  Coat ;   *tis  a  wonder  how 

the  Pope  got  it  from  the  Soldier  to  whom  ic 

fell  by  calling  Lots,  and  'tis  a  wonder  they 

I  have' 


TOO  The  Notorious  Life 

.  have  not  clipM  it  all  away  by  this 
i  ime. 

Secondly,  The  Holy  Relick  of  the  very 
Slippers  Chii'l:  wore,  when  He,  being  wea 
ry'  with  walking  about  doing  Gr.od,  put  oti 
his  Shoes,  for  the  eafe  of  his  Feet,  ftirely 
•they  were  made  of  well  Tan'd  Leather, 
that  hits  ftill,  and  are  not  Rotten  to  Dirt 
.ere  this  Day  ,  and  I  wonder  the  Pope  doth 
•expofe  them,  and  not  Monopolize  them  to 
himfeif,  for  they  cannot  want  a  Vertue  to 
Cure  liis  Gouty  Golls :  'I  is  ftrange  we 
hear  nothing  of  his  Shooes  (  in  the  Popes 
Warehoufe  )  the  Latchets  whereof,  John 
Eaptift  (  though  the  Greateft  Bern  of  Wc- 
mtn  )  thofight  himfeif  Unworthy  to  Un- 
loofe,  Mattb  IT.  n.  Luke  3.  16. 

Thirdly,  The    very   Linnen  Cloth  with 

which  Chnjl  was  wrap'd  in  the  Sepulchre, 

as  Iikewife  that  wherewith  Chrift  wiped  his 

Difciples  Feet.    I  am  thinking  the  Man  that 

;  Cries  in  o-ur  Streets,  [  Here's  jcur  ftrcvg  /ap- 

,  ing  Linnen  Cloth,  '}    might  do  good  Service 

in  this  Rcrm$)  Market. 

Fourthly,  The  very  Ntedfes ,  Threap 
Jl-'crk-Badet  and  SciJJirs,  of  the  Virgin  Mary, 
wliidi  would  be  excellently  ufetlil  for  an 
Exchange-lhop,-  and  could  not  fliil  to  brin."j 
;in  a  whole  fhoal  of  Chapmen,  &c.  How 
the  Po])e  comes  by  all  thefe  Rich  Con:n-.o- 

dirics 


of  this  prefer: t  Pope  of  Rome,     ioi 

Cities  for  a!l  kind  of  Cuftomers,  is  the  Que- 
ftion  ?  But  the  Infallible  Tradition  of  the 
Church  mult  be  the  Satisfactory  and  Si 
lencing  Anliver. 

Item,  Laltly,  Here  you  may  have,  what 
ever  your  Heart  wifhes,  or  Need  doth  Re 
quire.  Is  it  any  of  thole  many  things  men-" 
tioned  in  Revel.  18.  12,  13.  Rich  all,  here 
they  are  to  be  had.  Want  you  Holy  Bells 
(  Baptized  with  God-Fathers  and  God-Mo 
thers  )  God  Blels  our  Empty  New  Erecled 
Steeples,  &c.  Or  want  you  Holy  Beads^ 
made  of  Glafs,  Wood,  Stone,  Coral  or  Am- 
bzr  ;  Holy  Wax  for  your  Candles  ;  Holy 
Knives  for  Cutting  Hereticks  Throats ;  or 
Holy  Kofcs,  this  Chriftntas  time,  a  Rare  Prc- 
fent  for  Princes ;  or  what  elfe  foever,  all  is 
Holy  that  comes  from  his  Unholinels  ;  and 
all  have  a  Power  to  drive  away  the  Devil, 
yet  the  Devil  takes  mod?  of -thole  that  are 
taken  with  thele  [  PM?  Fraudes  ]  Holy 
Cheats.  None  of  their  Names  are  Writ  m 
the  Lambs  Book,  Revel.  13.  8,  God  Bleis 
every  good  Engh^man  from  the  Beaft  and 
his  Cheating  Tricks.  9 

Having  taken  a  fhort  profpect  of  the 
Graft  of  this  Insatiable Beaft  (to  keep,flo(e 
itill  unto  the  Irifo  Malack'is  Character  of 
this  present  Pipe  )  let  us  now  take  a  brief 
View  of  his  Lradty,  He  is  a  molt  Acconv 
'I  2 


ioi  7 'he  Notorious  Life 

plifti'd  Beaft,  his  Infallible  Unholinefs  is  De- 
icribed  by  an  Infallible  Hand  (  the  Spirit  of 
Truth  himfelf  )  in  his  molt  Horrible  Accou 
trements,  no  lefs  than  Seven  Heads  to  Plot 
with,  for  the  more  crafty  carrying  on  of 
all  his  Gainful  Cheats,  and  no  lefs  than  Ten 
Horns  to  pufli  his  Plots  emhvay  with,  and  to 
pufli  all  down  ( that  ftand  in  his  way  ) 
with  Unparrallel\l  Cruelty.  To  pretermit  all 
former  Bloudy  Plots  in  foregoing  Ages  of 
this  prefent  Popes  Preclecelfors,  againit  all 
Proteftant  Countries,  ever  fince  the  Refor 
mation,  and  againft  England  in  particular, 
both  in  Jjjueen  Elizabeth's,  King  James's,  and 
in  King  Charles's  the  Firft's  lime.  I  mail 
confine  my  felf  to  Characterize  this  Infatia- 
ble  Beap,  the  Devils  Patriarch,  that  now 
Poflelfeth  the  Roman  Omnipotency. 

His  Name  is  Innocent  the  Eleventh,  who 
after  his  Inftalment,  was  Arrayed  with  a 
White  Surplice,  wherein  he  Worfhip'd  that 
God  which  had  now  Conftitnted  him  the 
Universal  Monarch  ;  in  this  White  Gar 
ment  he  feem'd  as  pure  as  Innocence  it  felt; 
there  was  nothing  liirely  under  it  ,  but 
Meeknefs,  Genthnefs,  and  Lamb-like  Innc- 
cencj^  You  might  then  ftroke  the  Beaft,  He 
would  not  fpurn  you,  you  might  put  your 
Hand  into  his  very  Mouth,  He  by  no  means 
would  Bite  you.  ''No,  He  had  newly  put 

on 


of  this  prefent  Pope  of  Rome.      103 

on  the  Name  of  Innocent ,  and  He  was 
;'  what  ever  he  had  been  while  a  Cardinal ) 
now  become  an  Innocent  Pope,  a  Toothlefs 
Innocent  Milk-Sop,  that  would  neither  Kick, 
nor  Fling,  nor  Scratch,  nor  Bite  ;  but  the 
mifchief  was,  He  ioon '  after  going  to  his 
Court-Office,  De  propaganda  Fide  to  a  Ccn- 
fult  there,  coming  thither  without  his  White 
Garment  (that  Reach'd  down  to  his  Foot  ) 
His  Red  Shoes,  and  Red  Stocking  were  there 
Unhappily  Difcovered.  At  that  Confab  He 
Declar'd  his  Determinations,  That  he  Re- 
fblv'd  (  Adjuvants  Diabolo  )  to  Reduce  all 
the  Heretical  Coimtreys  iif  Europe  into  the 
Subjection  of  His  Roman  See,  and  He  laid 
('  for  a  living  Argument  )  'twas  below  both 
his  Hignefs  and  his  Holme ft  to  prove  fiich  a 
poor  Puny,  as  his  Predecefibrs,  in  playing 
fuch  (mall  Games  as  they  had  done  ;  He 
would  (  for  his  part)  Take  New  Measures, 
and  Make  fuch  Methods,  as  neither  God  nor 
Devil  could  be  able  to  Difapoint  him  of  his 
Defign.  Whereupon  for  the  better  Prc-foga* 
tion  of  his  Popifo  Faith,  He  prcpofcth  the(e 
following  Expedients,  and  not  only  16,  but 
Ittiibfetb  them  alfb  upon  that  his  Privy -Coun 
cil,  who  dare  not  gain-fey  their  God. 

The  fir/  Propofal  Iwpojcd,    was   this,    Go 

forth  you  my  Ermjjaries,    and  Debauch  the 

Heretical  Coimtreys,  Foilt  your  Loofe  ~Prm- 

I  ciples 


1,04  The  Notorious  Life 

cifks,  (  Calculated  for,  and  Accomodated 
to,  the  Depraved  Natures  of  Mankind  in 
general  )  this  will  fbon  bring  Men  to  Loofe 
Yraclices ;  '"1  is  found  by  Experience  (  faith 
He  in  great  Gravity,  comporting  with  hi$ 
Grandeur  )  a  Profptrous  Bait  to  Catch,  and 
a  Powerful  Hook  to .  Hold  whole  Shoals  of 
Profelites.  I  am  a  Fiflxr  of  Mtn,  as  my 
Fredecelior  Teter  was,  yet  I  have  a  Trick, 
which  He  (  f.mple  Fifher-man )  never 
thought  of,  or  Practic'd  ;  1  can  make  Men 
dtbei/ts  in  their  Lives,  and  then  they  will 
turn  Tapi/ls  the  fconer,  for  Hopping  the 
Mouths  of  their  Natural  Consciences 
(which  will  be  Barking)  the  better  with 
my  precious  Pardons,  whereby  lean  make 
the  worlt  of  Sins  Venial,  &c. 

Ihe  Second  Expedient  propounded  by  this 
Pope  there  was  this,You  Jejttits  mult  be  my 
Locufts,  my  Ktutefiaus  to  go  into  the  Courts 
of  all  thcie  Kingdomes,  and  let  them  all  on 
a  light  Fire  (in  V»arrin#  one aga'mlt another x) 
that  ray  Religion  ('which  hatti  grown  very 
cold  ever  iince  Unhappy  Luther  cali'd  the 
Pcpe  ,  slutichrilt )  may  be  warmed  again 
witli  thoil' very  FLimes  that  I  (  by  you  m 
Engin-js  )  have  kindled.  You  know,  Cljn 
hath  made  me  a  Filler  ef  Men,  as  before, 
a -id  I  find  it  belt  Ftfmnig  in  Irmhhd  Bale 
urn  the  true  Sa'xmstnJir,  tliat  can  belt 

live 


of  this  pretext  Pope  of  Rome.      i  o  $ 

live  in  the  Flames,  of  Foreign  and  Secular- 
Princes  Contentions,  &c. 

'1  he  'Third  Propofal  >  was,  to  J>  *w/e  f/&0/* 
Kings  that  will  not  Truckle  >  and  to  Expnfe 
their  Ki-ngdomes,  ^r/'wo  cccHpatwo,  the  rirft 
that  can  win  it,  kt  them  wear  it,  I  will 
warrant  the  Allault  of  the  Aggrelfor,  &c. 

Ttie'FotiFth  nimble  Trick  he  Fropol'ed 
was,  faying,  1  hough  1  have  a  Ihaufand 
more  Reaching  and  Elfec'tual  Knacks  to  of 
fer,  yet  feeing  you  know  them  all  fa  well, 
'ris  fupef  fluous  to  mention  more,  fave  onely 
this,  which  is,  Injlar  Omnium.  You  mult 
in  Reducing  all  others,  Begin  with  that 
Stubborn  Kingdom*  of  England,  which  hath 
been  more  fatal  to  my  1  ripple  Crown  thim 
a/1  other  Kingdomes,  and  when  you  have 
made  a  Breakfaft  of  that,  then  make  your" 
Dinner  of  this,  &*ft  and  your  Supper  of  that, 
&c.  and  fo  go  on  and  my  Bhlfing  go  with 
you. 

Thns  ended  the  Sentpbical  or  rather  Dia- 
bttlical  Oration  of  this  Innccmt  Grave  old 
Gentleman  that  never  did,  nor  ever  will  do 
Harm  to  any. 

This  done,  the  Damnable  Popifn  Plot  was 
in  all  its. Parrs  and  Paragraphs  contrivred>&c.  • 
The  Romifh  Fry  ofVricfts  andje\hit$^  (who 
were  loon  Hatch'd  and.  grew  Fledge  under 
his  Holiness  Wingj  came  Flying  over  in 
I  4  great 


io6  The  Notdrious  Life 

f  reat  Wild-goofe  Flocks  into  England,  we 
may  fuppofe  they  came  fully  furnifhed  with 
their  Tick-lccks  of  Pardons,  with  their  Pad- 
Iccks  of  Auricular  Ccnfeffiw,  and  all  other 
nfeful  Engines  to  promote  their  Hellifti 
Trojetf,  the  Sum  whereof  in  the  general 
was,  to  Subvert  the  Efiablifh'd  Government 
and  Religion  of  this  Kingdom,  and  to  Re 
duce  the  lame  to  the  Foppery  ofPcpery,  yea, 
and  'twas  concluded  at  the  Confult  fwhich 
thefe  Romifh  Emiflaries  came  to  Accom- 
plifli)  that  no  manner  of  Tolleration  mould 
be  granted  to  any  fort  of  Proteltants,  but 
all  fuch  fhould  be  Extirpated  Root  &  Branch, 
and  if  all  other  means  failed,  it  mould  be 
effected  by  Fire  and  Sward. 

The  cheif  Confpirators,  who  defigned, 
and  were  engaged  to  carry  on  this  Bloudy 
project,  muft  be  thus  Ranked  in  a  lafting 
Record. 

(tf3  Firft,  The  Fountain  of  thefe  Bitter 
Waters,  and  Original  of  all,  was  this  Trefent 
Pope  Innocent  the  nth,  who  in  the  Congrega 
tion  [  fie  propaganda  Fide  ~]  confifting  of  a- 
bout  35-0  Ferfons,  (all  fit  Tools  for  the  De- 
'.iirf  Work)  and  held  about  December  1677. 
iisfbon  as  he  was  well  warm  in  Peter's  Chair, 
Ke  Plots  (  even  in  that  cold  Seafbnj  work 
Hot  enough  for  poor  England :  Then  was  it 
He  beichd  out  that  noctnt  rather  than  Inno 
cent 


of  this  prefent  Tope  of  Rome.     107 

cent  Oration  aforementioned,  Declaring  fur-- 
ther,  that  this  Kingdome  was  a  part  of 
St.  Peters  Patrimony,  and  was  forfeited  to  the 
Holy  .See,  by  the  Herefy  both  of "Prince  and 
People,  and  (6  muft  be  difpofed  of  as  he 
thought  meet:  though  this  Pot>e  was  the 
frimus  motor,  the  yrimum  mobile,  or  great 
Wheel  that  moved  all  the  lower  Orbs,  and 
fet  all  the  Mer  Wheels  on  Work,  yet  Itt 
us  take  a  fhort  view  of  his  linder-Engines , 
before  we  more  fully  give  him  his  due  Cha 
racter,  upon  this  I  aft  (which  at  the  lajt  day 
will  be  a  great )  Account  alfo,  to  wit,  his 
Plots,  as  before,  his  Cheats ,  in  the  one  a 
crafty  Fox,  in  the  other  a  cruel  Tyger,  and 
furely  .whoever  were  the  Inftruments,  the 
Members,  the  Hands  and  the  Feet  for  Acting 
this  Bloudy  Plot,  to  Reduce  England  to  the 
Roman  Rotten  Religion,  we  fhall  find  Him 
the  Head  and  Principal  Agent.  My  Defign 
is  here  to  fet  the  Saddle  upon  the  Right 
Horfe:  'Tis  a  Thoufand  pitties,  that  the 
jetty  larceners  fhould  be  Hangd  and  Beheaded^ 
(though  that  be  no  more  than  what  both 
DiflnbuWue  and  Commutative  Juftice  molt 
Juftly  Required^)  and  the  grand  Thief  ( that 
let  them  all  on  work)  efcape  Scot-free.How 
many  .did  pity  thole  poor  mercenary. 
Rogues  that  were  Executed  for  that  Inhu 
mane  and  Cowardly  Murther  of  that  Emi 
nent 


rcS  Ths  Notorious  L/fe 

nent  Patriot  EfejuireThinn,  when  they  Aw 
Count  Connifmark ,  the  great  Rogue,  (  that 
fit  his  filly  Valikls  on  Work)  to  be  acquit 
ted  .  bite  there  is  a  []  3U»  ]  a  Vengeance 
(  even  in  the  Judgment  of  no  better  than 
Barbarians,  Ail.  28. 4.  )  which  will  notjujjer 
either  the  one  or  the  other  long  to  It-ve ;  be- 
caufe  the  God  of  Juftice  hath  peremptorily 
laid,  that  the  B/MtifrSBld  Deceitful  Menfw'Ji 
not  live  cut  half  their  days,  Pial.  f  f.  23. 

Take  here  a  Diftind  Lilt  and  Catalogue 
of  the  chief  Plotters  in  this  Late  and  Dam 
nable  Plot,  and  View  them  from  Head  to 
Foot,  from  Top  to  Tee,  as  they  ftand  Ranked 
in  our  Englifh  Records,  and  Orderly  Re- 
giftred  for  everlalting  Remembrance.. 

Firft,  This  Prefent  fcpe  Innocent  the  Ele 
venth  ,  the  Mafter  of  all  the  Mifrule  and 
Matcblefs  Mifchief :  as  the  Philofopher  faith 
of  Finis,  'tis  primus  Intent ione,  but  ultimas 
Executione  ;  So  muft  1  fay  of  this  Fino  Filth t 
He  is  the  firft  in  Intention,  ( his  Curled  Cha- 
radter  being  the  principal  end  propofed  in 
this  prefent  Difcourfe  )  yet  mult  He  come 
loft  in  Execution,  not  ontly  in  the  Method  of 
this  Platform,  butalfo  (  for  ought  1  yet  lee  ) 
in  the  Measures  of  Gods  Providence :  For 
the  Law  of  Jujtke  (  compared  .to  the 
Cobweb  that  catches  the  teller  Fives,  but 
cannot  keep  the  great  ones,  &c.)  is  too 

Lew 


of  this  prefent  Pope  of  Rome.     109 

and  Short  Handed  (as  to  Man)  to 
Reach  (b  High  and  fo  Far  us  the  Great  Goff 
of-'  Rome,  Yet  iiirjly  in  due  Season  His  £*;  . 
jkall  find  him  cut  by  the  great  God,  Numb. 
32.  23.  unto  whom  we  limit  leave  Him, 
for  He  is  the  Gal  of  Vengeance,  Juftice  is  Htsy 
and  He  will  Repay,  Dent.  32.  3^.  43. 
Ron. 12.  19. 

SeconMy  ,Cartlinal  H  wanl,  I  y  Eirth  both 
an    Englijl)  Man,  and  Brother  to  the  Great 
Duke  of  "Norfolk  ;  So  one  of  the  Popes  lirit 
and  litteit  Engines  to  Betray  England  into 
His  HJineJfa  Hands,  that  thereby  this  CVr- 
siinal  might  the  more   Merit  Saint  T?etirs 
Chair  upon  this  Popes  Departure  from  it, 
and  then  this  Sweet  Bit  (  our  Land  )  would 
prove  a  Sowceing  Augmentation  to  Peters 
Yatrimwy.  Therefore,  as  the  Pope  was  Lcrd 
High  AdrsiiYcl  in  the  whole   See  of  Rente ; 
,co,  it  'was  concluded  by  the  Cabal  in  the 
Coiledg  dc  frafagtmtla  f'de,  that  this  fame 
Engliflj  Cardinal,  Ihould  be  his  Vice  Adw'tral, 
and    hereupon  He    was  difbatch'd   away 
from  Rome  to  be  the  Pc^cs  Lcgatus  a  Lateret 
or  a   NwSacb  Nuncio  into  i.nglaTtd,  upon 
fiich  an  imparalidd  Errand,  as  never  any 
'EtxbaJj'a/1-.w  durlt  undertake,  which  was  to 
take  poiiejiibn  of  is  in  tins  Popes  Name,  as 
if  it   had  been   elaps'd  into  his   Hands  for 
want  of  either  Kcir  or  Irolieilour,  though 

Bleiied 


no  The  Notorious  Life 

Bleiled  be  God  it  hatli  both,  and  needs  none 
of  the  Popes  falfe  Claims,  or  foul  ufurpations: 
and  to  make  this  Cardinal  more  brisk  in  his 


exploit,  the  Pope  Creates  Him 
of  Canterbury  (  as  if  there  had  been  a  Va 
cancy  too  )  and,  that  Sees  Vaft  Revenue  be 
ing  look'd  upon  as  too  little  a  Bribe  for  fb 
•Heroick  an  undertaker,  the  Pope  ordains 
Him  Forty  Thouiand  Crowns  per  Annum 
out  of  His  own  Coffers  (  where  there  is 
Gold  and  Silver  enough,  &rc.  Rev.  18.  12, 
13.)  as  a  neceflary  fupplement  to  that 
pittiful  Arch-Bifhoprick  (the  Befr  and  Richeft 
in  England)  that  He  might  be  had  in  more 
Veneration  ,  and  the  better  Support  His 
Authoritative  Grandieur  :  And  as  if  this 
alone  were  below  this  Innocent  Harmlefs 
Tope  (  like  another  proud  Hainan  )  to  lay 
His  Violent  Hands  onely  upon  our  'Mordecai 
(  the  .Bijliop  of  Canterbury,  as  well  as  King 
Charles  the  Second  )  to  Difpoflels  them  bodi 
of  their  Crown  and  Miter  ,  but  He  daringly 
Difpoifeireth  (  fo  far  as  the  good  will  of  the 
evil  Beaft  would  ftretch  )  moft  of  our  other 
Bifiops,  promoting  His  own  Fopelings  as  16 
many  Interlopers  in  their  places,  as  Father 
Tcrrot  to  York,  Corker  to  London,  Whitebread 
to  Wtnchefter,  Strange  to  Durham:  G  odder 
to  Salisbury,  Napper  to  Norwich,  &rc.  I  ap 
peal  to  all  thole  Eifhops  (  whom  this  Pope 

would 


of  tins  prefent  Pope  of  Rome,     in 

would  have  turned  out  to  Grazing ,  unlels 
they  could  have  t urned  in  to  Him  )  whether 
His  Name  and  His  Nature  do  correfpond 
well  herein,  and  whether  they  would  noc 
have  had  hereupon  tar  greater  Reafbn  to 
brand  Him  ( as  in  Scripture ,  tbu  « 
King  Abaz, )  fey  ing  likewife ,  this  is  Pope 
Nocent,  rather  than  Pope  Innocent  tlfe  Eleventh: 
AH  mult  Truckle  to  Cardinal  Howard  His 
Nuncio. 

Thirdly,  Johannes  Paulus  de  Oliva,  comes 
in  next  to  play  his  pranks,  and  as  He  had 
been  the  Father  General  of  the  Jcfuits  in  all 
Lands,  16  this  Pope  Conftitutes  Him  his  Rert- 
Admiral,  to  Mann  and  to  Mannage  a  right 
Romes  Great  Man  of  War,  the  Provincial  of 
the  Je frits  in  London,  in  (6  noble  an  Attack: 
but  is  Attacking  in  a  Military  manner, 
proper  Work  for  an  Olivets ,  whole  Name 
carries  an  olive  Leaf  (that  Badg  of  Peace J 
in  its  Mouth,  but  it  feems,  He  will  be  like 
his  Great  Mafter,  Pope  Nocent  Innocent,  there 
is  War  in  his  Heart.  Which  minds  me  of  a 
Story  concerning  the  foregoing  Pope  Inno 
cent  the  Tenth,  who  bare  for  part  of  his 
Arms  [  a  Dove  with  an  Olive  Branch  in  her 
Mouth  j  Whereupon  our  Turn  Coat  and 
Runagate  DoEtw  Bully  wittily  Quibbles  up 
on  oliv*  vera,  profoundly  perverting  it  to 
Oliver  us,  and  highly  Courted  that  Protector 

with 


^l^  Tbe  Notorkus  Life 

with  his  SeiMphick  Companion  of  the  Olive 
and  Oliver,  See  his  Life  of /-//for,  p.  260,26  ri 
'•Tis  the  genuine  Chancier  of  u  "/?/?«;  ro 
have  Hattfy  (  or  the  O//-tv  <,f ~  Ftvw  J  ill  his 
Atcutb,  arid  rb  have  dt'iigned  (  yea  Cofrfe- 
crated)  Swords  and  Daggers  in  his  Heart. 
Oh  brave  Olive,  Oh  brave  Oliver,  the  han 
dle  of  the'  Sword  that  fhonld  have  been 
Shedth'd  in  our  Bowels,  Readied  to  R<m,^ 
and  was  held  in  this  Brave  olivas  Hand. 

Fourthly,  Tedro  ^ferommo  de  Conlnba^  Pro 
vincial  of  the  Jefuits  in  New-Caftle  in  Spain, 
the  Pope  mufe  have  here  a  Paul  (  as  His 
Third  Engine  )  and  a  'Peter  fas  this  Fourth) 
engaged  with  Himfelf  herein,  though  both 
Jejuits  (  without  wbom  no  Mifchief  in  all 
Europe  can  be  managed ,  the  Hand  of  Jcab 
or  Jefaite  is  in  all  )  to  make  this  Damnable 
and  Dtcbdical  Tlot  more  like  tyoftolical : 
That  Work  which  this  Pope  cut  out  for  hirri, 
Was  to  re  a  drard  Filet  in  his  Countrey,  ard; 
to  give  the  Plor  a  lift  endways,  both  with' 
Money  and  Men  i  tinder  the  notion  of  Fil 
grims  :  and  where  this  Popifh  Pedro  or  7V 
ttr  plaid  his  pranks  like  a  right  Beautifeu  t 
Sow  his  Seed  of  Contention  betwixt  that 
Crown  arid  this,  thereby  the  more  to  facili 
tate  the  further  Progrcfsof  the  Plot. 

Fifthly,  La  Cbefe  a. '~fe'tn!t  :co  ,  and  Con- 
n-r  (and  fo  muit  be 
Privv 


of  this  prefent  Pope  of  Rom?,     n j 

jPrivy  tp  all  his  Royal  Cefigns)  He  was  alfb 
a  Grand  Pilot  in  that  Countrey,  whole  hands 
WLTe  dire'fted  to  Steer  a  right  Courfe  here 
in  by  that  conceited  Coxcomb,  our  Cole- 
wan,  who  was  hang'd  for  his  pains  in  Be 
traying  his  own  Native  Countrey. 

Sixthly,  Another  Jefuite  (  1  have  rot  his 
Name,  and  indeed 'tis  not  worth  enquiry) 
who  is  Confe!,oiir  to  the  Empcrcur  of  Ger 
many  ,  mult  Create  Fends  betwixt  Him  and 
our  King :  1  hat,  with  all  thefe  pretty  Di- 
verfions ,  we  might  be  wheadkd  into  a  Ga 
zing  abroad  ,  while  they  by  their  Englifo 
Jefuits,  &c.  could  cut  our  Ifcroats  at 
Home:  Mark  here,  what  a  Sacred  Num 
ber  is  Six  ,  with  them  there  muft  be  5ix  of 
Forreign  Affiftants  (the  Number  of  the 
Beaft  is  Three  Sixes  as  before  )  and  ftill 
J efn its  every  where  muft  be  the  Inftru- 
mems  of  Cruelty,  though  the  Pope  be  the 
hand  to  Improve  them  :  I  the  lefs  \vonder 
3t  this,  fince  I  Read  that  paliage  in  the 
Jefuit  Muffenis  ,  Writing  the  Life  of  Igna 
tius  Ley  all  their  Founder  ,  He  there  Inge- 
rioufly  confelleth,  that  their  Father  Imitated 
the  Devil  in  ufing  Tricks  to  Cwvm  (  or 
rather  Ttr-jirt  )  Difci^les,  &*c.  You  may 
S\vear,  that  all  ths  Jcfuitsfo  Patrizjnsind 
will  Try  the  Devils  7'ricks  with  the  beft  of 
7^:.,^r. 

Cut 


U4  The  Notorious  Life 

But  are  our  Jefuits  in  England  afleep 
all  this  while  ?  No,  the  Pope  hath  Domtfiick 
Tools  as  well  as  Forreign. 

This  Popes  Domeffick  Engines  erhployed 
here,  were  Thefe 

Firft,  The  •'Provincial  of  the  Jefuits  ,  for 
the  Time  being  in  England,  who  was  White- 
Bread,  who  would  have  made  Brownbread 
and  Brann  of  us ,  but  he  fell  into  hx  own 
Pit,  &c. 

Secondly,  The  Bcnta'iftin*  Monks  at  the 
Savoy.  The  Duke  of  Savoys  Country  was 
eall'd  Malvoy,  becaufe  it  was  pefterd  fb 
notorioufly  with  Theeves  as  made  it  Mala 
Via  or  Malvoy,  that  is,  a  Dangerous  PaJJage, 
but  when-  the  Thieves  were  Rooted  out, 
its  Name  was  changed  into  Salvoy  or 
Savoy ,  the  way  thence  to  Somerfet-houfe, 
makes  the  Application  more  eafie. 

Thirdly,  The  Jefuits  and  Seminary  Priefts, 
who  were  Sowing  their  Tares  among  the 
Wheat  ( like  the  Envious  one  their  Father') 
all  over  the  Land,  they  being  about  the 
Number  of  Eighteen  Hundred,  a  large  black 
Regiment  under  Roman  Colours. 

Fourthly,  Many  Laj-Papifts  both  of  the 
Mobility  and  Gentry  (  too  well  known  to 
need  naming)  who  had  all  Comniiffions 
•Sealed  by  Brave  Oliva  aforementioned,  both 
for  Civil  and  Military- Employ, and  fent  them 

bv 


of  this  prefeni  Pope  of  Rome.     1 1 ,5" 

by  this  Pope,  as  the  Higheft  Marks  of  his 
Favour.         , ,  ?  i'.-;-j 

Fifthly  ,  Multitudes  ,  M&titinUi  of  the 
LajrPapifts  among  the  Commonalty.  •  Even 
all  the  Papifts  in  England  could  not  chufe. 
but  be  Engaged  in  fo  Glorious  and  Merito 
rious  a  Matter ;.  and  this  is  the  more  pro-, 
bnble,  If  not  only  their  General  Principles 
Imbibed  with  their  Religion,  but  alfo  the 
Popes  particular  .Teft  (  for.  Anathematizing 
us  HereticksJ  Impofed-Univerlally  on  them, 
be  but  Well  confidered. 
,  Sixthly,  For  itill  we  mufl;  have  the  Six  in 
Adoration  of  Six  Hundred  Sixty  Six,  &c. 
All  the  Englifh  Covents  beyond  Sea,  (  as  St. 
ors,  &c.  )  rnuft  be.almoft  drain'd  Dry, 
and  Transported  Incognito's,  hither,  toCor- 
roberate  the  better  carrying  on  of  theCa-. 
tiiolick  Caufe,  Which  was  now  become  as 
Catholiek  as  their  Religion,  having  likewife 
all  the  molt  Eminent  of  the  Popifh  Clergv 
in  Europe  Engaged  to  help  at  a  Dead  Lift, 
and  to  Lift  England  to  Rome.  Hereby  this 
Plot  became  the  Unanimous  Ad  of  the, 
Whole  Romifo  Church,  Whole  Infallible  and 
Innocent  Head  (this Pope )  Adjur'd  them 
to  it,  upon  the  forfeiture  of  theft  Fathers 
Bleiling.  Though  we  may  not  Imagine 
every  Individual  Popeling  could  know  the 
whole  Intrigue  (  for  there  might  be  # 
K  Wheel 


1 1 6  The  Notorious  Life 

Wheel  within  a  Wheel  )  yet  in  the  Lump 
they  pay  to  this  Fop^  their  Blind  Obedience, 
however  the  Guilt  both  of  the  parts,  and 
of  the  whole,  falls  upon  the  Innocent  Con- 
fcience  of  this  Pope,  which  all  his  Holy  Wa 
ter  cannot  wafh  oil,  and  make  him  as  Inno 
cent  as  his  Name,  mould  he  Conjure  Tibur 
itfelf. 

Now  when  His  Holinefs  had  thus  well 
furnifhed  his  Holy  Caufe  with  Men  (  a  dou 
ble  Set  of  Sixes,  a  Jury  of  Twelve,  I  can 
not  fay,  All  <~jocd  Men  and  True,  No,  not 
fb  much  as  the  Foreman  hintfelf)  His  next 
Care  is  to  be  Ihpply'd  with  Money,  the  Si 
news  of  His  Holy  War,  and  though  his  own 
private  Exchequer  be  Puteus  In  exbaujtus(a.s 
he  once  laid  of  England,  when  it  was  his 
Afs  to  Ride  on,  and  therefore  would  fain 
beftride  her  foft  Baek  again,  )  an  Inexhau- 
Jtible  Fountain,  yet  the  Old  Crafty  Fox  liked 
better  to  get  feme  Bearers,  well  knowing 
that  many  Hands  make  lighter  Work.  Here 
upon  by  his  Afofolical  Command^  as  well 
as  Example.  A  Vaft  and  Prodigious  Fund 
was  quickly  Ereded  for  fo  Great  and  Pious 
a  Work. 

Fir/,  The  Pope  himfelf,  to  be  a  good  Pat 
tern  to  others,  conveys  into  his  Sacred  Trea- 
fiiry  by  Paulas  de  Oliva,  or  Paul  Olive,  Ele- 
vtn  Tbwfand  Crowns,  I  wonder  He  made  it 

not 


of  this  prefent  Pope  of  Rome.     117 

not  even  Twelve,  and  the  Crown's,  PotmJs  5 
His  own  full  Coffers  Revel.  18. 12.  might 
-jvell  enough  have  born  it  befides  ;  the  Re- 
-gaining  of  England  to  His  Revenue  would 
well  enough  have  Countervail'd  that 
Coft. 

Secondly,  The  Catbolick  King  (  His  Eldeft 
Son  )  of  Spain  (names  his  Holy  Father,  in 
Advancing  Ten  Thouland  Pounds  by  Peter 
Jeronimus ;  thus  his  Indian  Gold  was  Expend 
ed. 

Thirdly,  His  Moft  Chrifrian  Son  of  France 
(to  fhew  himfelf  the  better  Chrijtian,  or 
rather  Antichriftian, )  Advanceth  Ten  Thou- 
&nd  Pound  more  by  Father  Le  Cbeefe,  what 
a  (hame  it  is,  that  His  Holinefs  mould  be 
out  done  by  both  his  Sons,  when  it  was  pe 
culiarly  HisCaufe,  and  He  would  have  Run 
away  with  the  Profit. 

Fourthly,  I  wonder  we  hear  nothing  of 
the  Emperors  Charity,  was  it  becaufe  he  was 
too  Nigardly,  or  becaufe  the  Male-Contents 
of  Hungary  kept  his  Coffers  Empty ;  how 
ever,  divers  coniiderable  Sums  were  tranP 
mitted  to  Cokman  by  Foreign  Ministers, 
among,  whom,  He  from  Germany  might  be 
one. 

fifthly,  But  the  Engtifi  Jefuits  (  fuppo- 

fing  the  Emperor  to  be  too  -Narrow  So///V, ) 

Ex  Abundantly  fupply'd  all  Defers,   they 

&  z  having 


1 1 8  The  Notorious  Life 

having  Tbreeftore  Thoufand  Pound  per  An- 
mm,  Eftate  in  Land  here,  and  an  Hundred 
Thoufand  Pound  Ready  Cafh,  a  conliah; 
Running  Stock  in  the  way  of  their  "Trade 
which  (  you  know  )  is  the  Mjftery  of  Ini 
quity. 

Sixthly,  The  Benefit  ftine  Mwks  (not  tr 
be  thrult  out  as  Rotten  )  contribute  out  61 
their  Blefled  Treaftire,  Six  Thouland  Pound 
to  purchafe  the  Popes  Benediction,  whom 
they  alfo  exceeded  in  their  Benevolence,  &< 

Seventhly,  God  Blefs  us,  here's  the  Third 
Six  again,  and  16  we  have  got  rhe  exact 
Number  of  the  Beaft,  Six,  and  Six,  and  Six, 
or  Six  Hundred  Sixty  Six,  and  to  make  up 
this  Number  compleat,  the  Englijl)  Catholick 
('as  well  as  Rcmon)  Grandees  were  free 
Contributors  of  moft  Ample  Benevolencien  to 
ftiis  fo  Great  and  fo  Glorious  a  Work. 

No  fooner  had  this  Innocent  Pope  thus 
provided  Himfelf  ( though  He  as  to  his  parf, 
comes  oft"  but  Stingily  )  with  qnantum  fuf- 
fcit  (  or  rather  fxjfocfif)  as  to  Juitice  God- 
frey  )  both  tit  Mtn  and  Money  :  He  then 
lends  forth  His  hungry  Beagles  to  Hunt  the 
•hflrmlefs  Hare,  that  never  gave  them  the 
Jeait  provocation  :  but  He  muft  do  it,  'trs 
.ihe  nature  of  the  B'eaft  to-  worry  the  Harm- 
?eis,  and- 'tis  the  cnjtome  (  which  is  a  fecond 
rafure  v  of  this  Innocent  ¥<ope  to  be  notw'f- 
oi! ay  jVit-fw  to  tine  bmocent.  The 


I^o  fhe  Notorious  Life 

Succeeded  fb  far  as. to  make  this  Man  the 
firjt  Martyr  of  our -Religion,  and  a  fair  Ran- 
fow  of  cur  Realm.  ~ . 

The  like  was  Attempted  upon  Juftice 
Arnold,  though  no  other  Crime  was  found 
in  either,  lave  a  faithful  Dilcharge  of  their 
Oath  and  Duty.  Nor  againft  Juftice  Pye 
neither,  yet  Bodnam  the  Papilt  prevail'd  to 
knock  down  his  Clay-Cruft  with  his  Bill, 
whereby  thisgW  Pye  (a  lerviceable  Difhin 
fJcreforijhire)  was  Deftroyed. 

Fourthly,  The  Popes'  Agents  ( being  now 
Flefh'd  in  Proteftants  Blond,  yet  unable  to 
filfle  the  Plot,  when  it  once  was  Declared  by 
both  Houfes  of  Parliament  that  there  was  a 
Traiterous  Defign  of  the  Pope  to  Subject 
this  Kingdom  to  his  Tyrannical  Govern 
ment,  by  thefe  Five  pernicious  Lords  in  the 
Tower ,  whereof  Stafford  lately  Execu 
ted  was,  &c.)  do  then  club  their  Wits,  not 
onely  with  this  Pepe  (-the  Devils  Eldeft  Son  ) 
but  even  with  the  Devil  himfelf,  how  they 
might  handlbmly  Sham  it,  and  this  they  la- 
tour  in  the  very  Fire  to  Accomplifh. 

Fifthly,  Then  began  they  to  play  their 
Popifh  pranks  in  Slaving  the  Kings  Evidence, 
Sir  Dennis  Aftkurnham,  the  S'aint  Owners  Boys, 
are  brought  in  to  Accufe  Dottor  Oats  of 
Perjury,  as  Lane  and  Osborn  did  o 
.the  like  pranks  againft  Prance,  Bedlce, 


of  this  prefent  Tope  of  Rome.      1 1 1 

&c.  but  their  Bowl  Runs  not  here 
wirhout  a  Rub  for  their  Defign  of  Srabborn- 
ing  Alderman  Brook  and  Captain  Bury,  be 
ing  Dilcovered,  this  Difcover'd  alfo  that  all 
the  aforefeid  Tools  were  but  the  Popes  or  the 
Devils  Trunks  through  which  he  ipake,  as 
he  uled  to  do  in  his  Dumb  Images,  which 
the  Father  of  Lyes  taught  to  lay  what  he 
lifted,  yecmuft.be  his  Oracles. 

Sixthly,  They,  being  Non-plns'd  herein 
alfo  by  the  Over-ruling  Hand  of  God,  be 
gin  new  Methods  by  the  Popes  Advice 
(  and  indeed,  what  fhould  direft  Hands  and 
Feet  but  the  Head)  then  thought  of  fliift- 
ing  the  Plot  from  their  own  fhoulders  by 
Forging  feveral  Sham-Plots,  all  to  be  Fa 
thered  upon  the  Proteftants :  thus  at  a 
pinch  they  are  Ingenioje  nequam  ,  wickedly 
witty. 

Hen  quantum  fubitis  cafibus  Ingenwrn. 

Yet  this  was  but  to  new  Vamp  a  pair  of 
their  old  Boots,  for  that  Impious  Pope  Pitts 
the  Fifth,  taught  his  Popilh  Priefts,  that 
when  they  had  by  the  Powder  Plot  blown 
up  the  King  (James )  Lords  and  Com 
mons,  to  Father  that  filthy  Fad  upon  the 
Puritans :  the*  Father  of  Lyes  is  put  hard 
;o  his  Trumps ,  when  he  is  fo  low  Run, 
K  4  that 


The  Notorious  L/fi 

that  he  hath  no  new  Tricks  in  his  Tinkers 
budget  to  Itop  holes  with  ,  but  is  forced  to 
bring  forth  his  old  Bciiiboki  Stratagems, 
However  He  is  Refolved  to  drive  this  Tin- 
kers  nail  f  new  pointed )  fo  far  as  it  would 
"go  with  his  Hammer. 

.  In  Order  to  this,  They  ftart  many  Sf>a&- 
flotsy  wherewith  they  indeed  began  betimes, 
even  in  1661  fas  Captain  Tarranton  Demon- 
ilrates,  when  the  Crown  was  fcarce  warm 
Upon  our  King  Charles  his  HeacT:  but  that 
2nd  all  other  Succeilively,  were  but  low 
Games  compared  to  this,  for  then  they  had 
'not  fucli  a  Damnable  Plot  Discovered  to 
Palliate  as  now,  even  this  Pjot  of  Plots  that 
was  Hatched  at  Rome  as  (bon  as  this  Indent 
Pope  ItorrrTJ  "Peter's  Chair,  his  Miter  was 
icarce  warm  upon  his  Hea<4  fput  upon  him 
In  the  Year  1676.)  but  prefently  the  pevil 
enters  into  him  fas  if  he  had  taken  JuJass 
Sopj  and  lets  both  his  Head  and  his  Heart 
to  Contrive  this  Bloudy  Defign,  which  for 
i  wo  full  Years  (like  that  fir  ange  River  Re 
lated  in  Hiftojyj  Ran  underground,  before 
it  brake  forth  and  was  Difcoveretf  in'^he 
Year  167^.  Now  when  that  Devil  and  his 
Deeds  of  Darknefs  was  Brought  to  Light 
:  though  long  wrapM  up  in  Samuels  ManUe) 
by  the  Father  of  Lights,  who  always  o.v'er- 
Satan  in  in  his  own  Eqw,  thele  wliite 
"•  •  "'  \Vitchaj 


of  thU  prefettt  Pope  of  Rome. 

Witches  would  fain  Conjure  him  down  with 
fmiltiplyd  Sham-plots  :  Indeed,one  begetting 
anotherQm/pft"0  Unius  was  GeneratioAlteriw. 

The  Firft  was,  The  Clapping  up  of  Afr. 
Chpoolinto  the  Tower,  before  their  plot  was 
Discovered ,  that  fhey  might  have  him  at 
Hand  to  Father  the  Kings  Murder  upon, 
fo  (boo  as  he  fhould  fall  by  their  Hands, 
tvhereas  all  the  Treafan  that  can  be  charg'd 
upon  this  model!:  Gentleman,  is,  that  he 
jiath  led  a  Retired  Life  for  many  Years,  and 
onely  feekt  to  betray  the  Secrets  of  Nature 
by  hard  Study,  as  alfo  that  he  Marryed 
Olivers  Jewel,  which  render'd  him  more 
fit  to  Fatten  their  Defigns  upon. 

TheSecW  was,  A  Railing  of  the  Report, 
that  Jujtice  Godfrey  was  &  Papift  (one  of  their 
Creatures  laid  fo  much  to  my  (elf )  and 
that  he  was  Murdered  by  the  Proteftants, 
*&c.  This,  by  Devils  means,  was  made  the 
common  pifcourfe  in  every  Coffehou(e,  to 
•317111  le  the  Nation ,  and  to  give  them  a 
•Diverfion  from  the  Fapifts.  The  now  Ho- 
•neft  Mr.  Dangerjithl  knows  it  to  be  true. 

Of  the  feme  Bran  was  a  later  Report  that 
Juftice  Godfrey  Hangd  himfelf,  for  which 
jV.  T.  wasPillory'd,  both  could  not  be  true, 
if  the  one,  then  not  the  other,  whereas  nei 
ther  is  true,  for  he  neither  Hangd  himfelf, 
jior  civet}  he  by  Proteftants  but  by  Papifts 

'  Hands : 


Notorious  Life 

Hands :  ft  ill  the  Death  of  one  Sham-plot 
gave  Life  to  another,  and  one  Bafied  begat 
another  to  the  end  of  the  Chapter. 

The  time  would  fail  (as  Room  I  am  fure 
doth)  to  Reckon  all  Romes  Plots. 

The  Third  was  (to  omit  Netervils  endea 
vouring  to  Suborn  Captain  Bury  and  Alder 
man  Brooks,  &cj  The  Duke  of  Buck,  was 
an  Eye-fore  for  faying  (I  fuppofe)  he  would 
never  turn  Papilt,  till  they  can  eat  up  the 
Devil,  as,  they  fay,  they  do  God  in  their 
Hoft. 

For  this  they  firft  Accufe  him  of  Treafon, 
and  this  failing,  of  Sodomy. 

The  Fourth  was,  The  Earl  of  Shaft  shury 
was  their  greateft  ftumbling  Block,  becaule 
His  Sagacity  had  fb  oft  Countermined  their 
Devilifh  Defigns ,  Hereupon,  Plots  upon 
Plots  were  laid  againft  his  Life :  both  hy 
Men  and  Women,  in  City  and  Country. 

The  Fifth  was,  Sir  William  Waller  had 
f  while  in  Commiffion)  been  a  Thorn  in  their 
Sides,  for  daily  Ferreting  the  Foxes  out  of 
their  Holes,  where  they  had  Earth'd  them- 
felves,  and  openly  Condemning  their  Trum 
peries  to  the  Flames  of  a  Purgatory-fire  above 
ground  :  no  wonder  then,  if  they  at  that 
time  fought  to  blaft  his  Reputation,  as  they 
( to  wit,  Monfon,  whom  he  had  committed 
to  Newgate)  and  Nevil ,  aforementioned, 

(tf/ftfi 


of  this  prefect  Pope  of  Rome.     1 1  ^ 

(•Alias  Paine)  do  now  feek  to  Deftroy  his 
Life,  the  Preservation  whereof  the  'whole 
Nation,  yea,  the  whole  Froteftant  Intereft 
are  obliged  to  Pray  for,  He  being  an  Adive 
Inltrnment  in  Gods  Hand  for  the  Prelerva- 
tionofboth. 

But  the  Sixth  fand  ftill  this  Miftery  of  Ini 
quity  Runs  all  in  Sixes  both  in  the  Real  and 
in  the  Sham-plots,  in  the  fcrtner  and  in  the 
latter  Diftribution.  )  was  a  Plot  of  Plots,   a 
"Wickednefs  with  a  Witnefs  indeed  :  which 
(in  fbme  fenfe)  was  worfe  tkan  either  the 
jrft  or  Parifian  Maffacre,  wherein  good  Men 
onely  loft  their  lives,  but  herein  they  muft 
lofe  their  Reputations  too,  as  Branded  with 
Rebellion  to  Polterity  .  "I was  worfe  than 
the  Cruelty  of  Nero,  who  only  wifhM  all 
the  People  had  but  one  Neck  ,  that  He 
might  cut  them  all  off  at  one  Blow  :  but 
here  was  more  than  a  hare  u>ifo,  a  crafty  en 
deavour  to  blow  up  all  the  Proteftant  Lords 
(  the  Duke  ofMonmouth,  &c. )  All  the  Pro 
teftant   Gentry  and  Teamanry    in  City  and 
Country  at  one  Elaft,  by  fixing  High  Trea- 
fon  upon  them  all  Univerially :  and  when 
tlie  Knife  was  at  our  Throats,  God  fent 
Sir  William  Waller  to  turn  up  thebottou  of 
Mad-dame  Celliers  Meal-Tub,  where  all  the 
Bran  of  this  Briuiih  Intreague  was  Difco- 
vered,  Cum  mult  is  aim  ^u^e  nunc  perfcrifare 
e.  Thefe 


The  Notorious  Ltfe 

Thefe  and  a  Thoufand  more  pretty  Inno 
cent  Pranks  hath  this  Pope  Innocent  the  Ele 
venth  plaid  in  poor  England,  though  not  in 
his  Per/o»,  yet  by  his  Pro*/,  whatever  His 
Slaves  and  Vaflais  have  Aded  here,  even 
Mat  chiefs  Villanies,  All  have  been  by  an 
Implicit  Faith,  and  by  a  Blind  Obedience  to 
his  A-pofrolical  (  or  rather  Ayoftaticol  )  Com 
mands  ;  but  furely  that  Servant  who  will 
be  Hang'd  for  his  Matter,  or  for  his  Ma- 
Iters  Fault  more  than  his  own,  muft  needs 
have  more  pf  Blind  Charity ,  than  of  a  Solid 
judgment. 

l3r  One  would  Admire,  that  any  Hu 
mane  Breaft  could  be  fo  Capacious  as  to 
contain  in  it  fo  much  Villauotts  Venom  as 
this  Innocent  Pope  bath  poured  out  upon 
England ;  but  is  here  all  ?  No,  Scotland, 
France,  Ireland  and  Holland,  yea,  and  all 
other  Proteftant  Countries,  mutt  likewife 
£e  Wounded  ivith  the  Poifonful  Sting  of  this 
.Fiery  Ffying  Serpent,  this  Great  Red  Dragcn, 
Mounted  aloft  upon  the  Highefy  Theatre  in 
the  Christian  World,  hath  his  profpeft  into 
all  thefe  places,  and,  as  if  He  True  Baft? 
Ihi>  Kills  down-right  with  his  very  Looks, 
His  Looks  are  Top-full  of  Fafcinatjon.  'Jo 
tell  diftincWy  how  he  hath  Bewitched  with 
his  bare  Lwks  all  thofe  Lands  aforenamed, 
ire  anotjier  Vplufli.  Take  here 

only 


of  this  prefent  Pope  of  Rome.     117 

only  a  very  Brief  Landskip  hereof,  which 
yet  may  ferve  to  fatisrie,  that  this  pretend 
ed  Head  is  Top-full  of  Poifbn,  and  this  Ca- 
tholick  Head  of  the  Church  Transfufeth  a 
Fatal  Poifon  into  all  the  parts  of  the  Body ; 
his  Venom  is  as  Univerfal  as  his  Headship. 

As  Firft-y  For  Scotland,  He  fent  feveral 
Tetiiirs  to  Preach  there  under  the  Notion  of 
Presbyterians,  who  Induftrioufly  Blew  up 
the  Coals  of  Difcontent  among  that  People, 
knowing  that  Oppre/ion  rnaketb  Wife  Men 
Mad,  Aggravating  to  them  their  Unbeara 
ble  Burdens  under  Epifcopal  Tyranny,  ex- 
citeing  them  to  Vindicate  their  Religion 
and  Liberty  with  the  Sword,  and  promising 
them  in  the  Popes  Name,  That  they  fhould 
be  Alfifted  with  Eight  Thouland  Cathdicks 
to  overturn  the  Government. 

Oh  how  did  this  Pope  Laugh  in  his  Lawn 
Sleeves,  to  fee  liimfelflb  Successful.  See 
Dr.  Oats  Narrative,  Art.  i,  74,  n. 

Secondly,  As  to  France,  How  far  this  In- 
nocene  Pope  hath  been  Nscent  there,  How  far 
his  Tintture  of  Lucifer  hath  turn'd  his  Cbri- 
ftian  Son  into  Anticbrijtiant  may  be  Legibly 
Read,  even  in  Capital  Letters,  in  the  Blondy 
Wljalet  upon  the  Backs  of  the  Httgvnots,  but 
fnoft  of  all  in  thzt'-DetefableTeft,  which 
Wounds  not  their  Bodies  only  ,  but  their 
unlefs  they  will  Abjure  the  Prote^ 

ftant 


The  Notorious  Life 

fiant  Religion,  Anathematize  all  Proteftants, 
this  hath  Tu rn'd  out  of  France  many  Thou- 
fands  of  the  Tendered  part  of  that  People 
into  Foreign  Countries,  though  it  be  fo  Dia 
metrically  contrary  to  the  Sacred 
Editt?  of  Nants,  io  fbitmnly  Sworn  to  by 
'the  French  King.  Yet  this  Pope,  byiiis  Om- 
nipoter.cy,  dare  Abfolvehim  from  this  Oath, 
and  Undertakes  to  make  Sin  a  Duty.  See 
Sir  William  } filer's  Account  of  the  prefent 
State  of  the  Trot  eft  am  s  there.  And  fee  alfo, 
The  Politicks  of  France.  And  whether  all 
this  Gonteipt  betwixt  the  Father  and  the  Son, 
about  the  Regalia's,  be  not  all  a  Juggle, 
( feeing  the  poor  Proteftants  are  among 
hands  16  levearly  Perfecuted,  and  peltilent 
Jefliitsfb  Cordiaiiy  Embraced, )  Time  will 
Declare. 

Thirdlj,  As  to  Ireland  y  Dr.  Oats  De^ 
pofeth,  Narrat.pag.6)  ,66.71131.  this  Innocent 
Pope  fent  his  Bloudy  Info  Hounds,  Commlljlons^ 
Arms,  and  Eight  Hnndred  Thousand  Crowns, 
that  they  might  cut  the  Throats  of  the 
Proteftants  again,  as  they  had  done  by  ano 
ther  Innocent  Popes  Order  in  One  Thoufand 
Six  Hundred  Forty  One.  The  Death  of 
the  Duke  of  Ormond  mould  lead  this  Po- 
pifh  Dance,  the  Pope  loofes  of  his  Blond- 
Hounds  (  Four  Jefuits  )  who  Undertook 
to  Difpatch  the  Duker  Twenty  Five  Thou- 

land.- 


of  this  prefent  Pope  of  Rome.     119 

land  Irijh  were  to  Rife,  and  play  their  Old 
Bloudy  Game,  wherein  they  were  Experi 
enced,  and  Artificial  Gamefters.  Thefe 
were  to  Join  with  a  French  Army  to  be 
Landed  there,  and  as  good  Gamefters  of 
that  Kind  as  they,  fo  fall  on  to  their  Old 
Trade  of  Maffacring,  &c.  Yea,  fome  of 
thofe  Irijh  Cattel  had  a  Difpenfation  from 
this  Pope  to  take  the  Oaths  of  Allegiance 
and  Supremacy,  provided  they  promife  to 
Betray  their  Garrifons,,  and  other  Trufts; 
So  that  when  you  fee  a  Papiit  fwallow  thofe 
Oaths,  you  may  Swear  'tis  with  fuch  a 
frovifo,  He  hath  fome  Truft  or  other  to  Be 
tray. 

Fourthly,  Holland,  There  this  Innocent 
Pope  hath  fet  his  Foul  Foot  (  of  the  Beaft  ) 
to  purpofe,  in  lending  his  Moft  Chriftian  Son, 
moft  Unchriftianly  to  Scourge  them  for 
their  Herefie,  and  to  over-run  their  Coun- 
tfey  with  his  Rapacious  Army  i  and  had 
not  God  Almighty  put  an  Hook  into  the 
Jaw  of  that  Proud  Leviathan  at  Utrechj 
He  had  laid  their  Land  under  an  Abfolute 
Defolation.  To  fay  nothing  of  His  Intrigue- 
ing  Influences  to  plunge  them  and  us 
into  a  War  to  Waft  and  Weaken  each  other, 
that  He  might  the  eafier  worry  us  both  : 
To  fay  nothing  of  Hungary  and  other  parts 
of  Germany ,  nor  of  the  Three  Northern 

Crowns  \ 


130  Ttie  Notorious  Life  .. 

Crowns ;  in  all  which  fie  hath  throughly 
tryed  the  lame  Traity  Tricks  of  Divide,  and 
Command,  &C.  i  •; 

Yet  while  this  Pope  is  thus  Malevolent 
and  Mischievous  abroad  (  embroiling  all 
Countries  with  his  Contagious  Evomitions  ) 
He  is  all  this  while  Mighty  Magnificent  and 
Magifterial  at  Home  ,  itrutting  about  in 
that  Splendour  and  Grnndettr,  as  if  He  were 
more  than  a  Mortal  Man  on  Earth,  one  of. 
the  Immortal  Angels  of  Heaven,  Refembling 
the  Angelical  Nature,  not  onely  in  Innccency 
in  his  Name  Innecent,  but  alfo  in  Luflrs  and 
Glory  ,  as  to  his  Garb  and  Deportment. 
Grant  Him  to  be  one  of  the  Angels  Order,- 
yet  undervalue  him  not,  by  reckoning  him 
among  the  Inferior  Rank.  No,  let  him  be 
Reputed  no  lefs  than  proud  Lucifer,  a  Prince 
or  Principality  among  them,&c.  Ifa.  14.14. 
As  to  his  Innocency  ,  Angel  like,  I  can  lay 
little  of  it,  and  fure  1  am  nor  no  body  elle 
(  unlefs  fame  of  his  Sycophants  who  can  be 
content  to  lick  up  his  Slaver,  as  once  one 
Varafae  did  a  Tyrants)  no  further  than  his 
Name  [Inrioceni]  Will  be  the  Guarrantv: 
To  be  Nccent  in  Nature  ( as  the  premises 
have  proved  him )  and  to  be  Innocent  tn 
Name,  is  to  make  himielf  a  compleat  lump 
of  ContradiLtion :  However  this  Whore  of 
can  exactly  Imitate  Solomons  Whorr. 

in 


of  this  prefect  Pope  of  Rome.       r  3  r 

in  wiping  her  Mcuth,  and  faying  I  have  not 
done  thole  mifchtefsin  allthofe  Lands  afore 
mentioned  :  But  as  to  this  Splendour  and 
Glory,  Angel-like,  I  have;  inors  to  fay  than 
I  have  room  for,  as  to  his  Roman  Grandeur* 
never  was  Jaddus  ( the  High  Prieft  of  the 
Jews  )    (b  Richly  Arrayecf  for  Glory  and 
Beauty,  when  Gnat  Alexander  met  him  and 
fell  down  to  Worfhip  him  for  a  god,  as  this 
Roman  Pontifex  in  all  his  pompious  pontifi- 
calibus  is,  either  fitting  in  his  Chair  of  State, 
or  ftanding  upright,  or  ftrutting  about.  The 
Prophet  Eztkiel  moft  graphically  Defcribes 
this  Anointed  Cherub,   that  Seats  himfelf  intht 
Holy  Mountain  <>fGcd,&fosas  Gc;/(that  is  a  de-. 
greeabovean^^f  l)wue  ring  himfelfwith  every 
pretiotts  Stone,  the  Rubys,  the  Diamonds,  the 
Jafper,  the  Saphire  and  JLmerauld,  &c.  Ez^k, 
28.  2.  i  j,  14,  15-,  to  20.  Oh  what  a  glit 
tering  and  glorious  Scarlet  coloured  Beait 
is  this,   thus  bedeckt  with  Radiant  Jewels. 
No  wonder  if  they  give  him  this  Canting 
Courtfhip  [Thou  art  the  prime  of  all  Bifliops, 
the  Heir  of  the  Apt iftlet,   an  Abel  for  primacy 
(iure  I  am,  not  for  Religion)  a  Noah  fir 
Government  (not  for  Righteoufnefs)  an  A- 
brahamfor  Patriarkflnp  (  not  for  Piety  )  a 
Mdchifede&kfor  Order,  an  Aaron  for  Dignity, 
a  Mofes  for  Authority,  a  Samuel  for  Judica- 
a  Peter  for  rower,  yea;  a  Corifi  fa 


IJ1 


The  Notorious  Life 

Unction  ,  but  none  of  them  for  Holinefs, 
though  that  be  his  Title  :  No  wonder  if 
his    pickthanks  go  yet  higher,  in  calling 
him  rtfjeir  Lord  God,  their  Creator  in  whom 
they  muft  Believe,  and  whom  they  ?nuft  Obey 
upon   pain    of  Damnation  ~]    no  wonder  if 
they  fay  to  this  their  God  three  times  [Oh 
Thou  that  takeft  tnvaj  the  Sins  of  the  World, 
have  Mercy  on  us.  Thou  eanft  make  a  Sin  10 
be  no  Sin,  &  contrb]  No  wonder  if  Pope- 
lings  Kifs  the  great  Toe  of  their  Great  God, 
in  a  Country  where  C?od  hath  Toes,  which 
Mofes  (who  came  neareft  him )  could  not 
DKcern,  and  much  lels  Kifs,  Dent.  4.12,15-. 
No  wonder  if  Kings  and  Emperours  hold 
the  Stirrop,  to  this  God,  when  weary  with 
Walking,  and  would  Ride,  one  Beait  upon 
die  back  of  another,  rro  wonder  ifodefckal- 
cho  thought  his  Name  too  bafe  for  a  God,  as 
Offavian  did,  when  chofen  Pope  at  Eighteen 
Years  old,  caft  off  his  Name  becaufe  Heath- 
niflj,   and    calls    himfelf  John    the    Thir 
teenth,  but  he  proved  fticli  a  God  as  ivfed 
to  drink  Healths  to  the  Devil,  and  in  his 
Diceing  would  Pray,  that  Jupiter,   Vemrs 
and  all  the  Devils  would  help  him. 
This  was  a  Mad  Jack  indeed,  and  as 
e  All  good. 


of  this  prefent  Tope  of  Rome.      133 

To  conclude  ,  come  my  Country-men,- 
how  can  you  like  to  Worfhip  fuch  a  God, 
(who  is  rather  a  Devil  Incarnate,  or  the 
Devils  Patriarch)  can  you  itoop  to  kifs  his 
jlinking  Tee,  can  you  hold  his  Stirrup  (  as  too 
many  are  doing)  till  he  get  upon  your  owii 
Backs  and  Ride  you  to  the  Devil,  Grave 
Bifiop  Ufoar  feard  a  Mafiacre  approach 
ing,  and  that  this  very  Pope  would  be  the 
chief  Agent  in  it  ?  Can  you  Court  in  a  blou- 
dy  Villain,  who  will  certainly  cut  your 
Throats  ?  Can  ycjti  like  to  Trade  with  fiidi 
a  Cheat  (that  is  M  Crafty  as  Cruel,  having 
as  much  of  the  Fox  as  of  the  Lyon  )  in  his 
Trafli  and  Trumpery  afore  mentioned  ?  This 
Pope  had  great  hopes  of  Reentry  into  Eng^ 
land  by  his  hopeful  Plot ,  hereupon  Cotting- 
tons  Bones  were  brought  to  be  Buried  here? 
to  take  pofleflion  of  it  as  Jacob  did  in  like 
matner  of  Canaan:  Indeed,  the  late  Comet 
frighted  him  into  ftich  a  coll  Sweat,  as  no 
thing  but  a  Dutch  Stove  could  bring  warmth 
into  him  again,  and  the  Cockatrice  laid  by 
the  Prophetic k  Hen  in  Camfidcglis  Garden 
itnn'd  him  a  little;  But  now  he  Recovered 
with  warm  Cltatbs  and  hot  Cordials  again, 
. .  vet  1  hope  'tis  but  a  lightning  before  his  fall : 
God  forbid ,  that  the  Imperial  Crown  of 
J>£iV»^  fliould  again  Truckle  to  the  Mker 


ac 


134  "The  Notorious 

and Tripple  Crown  of  this  Pope.-  Erafmu? 
.Satyrical  Drollery  prevailed  againlt  the 
Pope  ,  as  well  as  Luthers  Argumentative 
Gravity,  I  wifh  the  like  Efficacy  to  this  Dii- 
courfe,  and  let  all  good  People  fay,  Amen. 


FINIS, 


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